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where-theres-smoak-2 · 2 years ago

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S+B Season 2 Alina and Nikolai Clip Thoughts (Spoilers)

I just watched the clip released showing the meeting between Nikolai, Alina and M*l. I think its revealed some interesting possibilities and I have a few questions now too. I am going to be discussing some things that happened in the books in this post so you’ve been warned if you haven’t read the books and don’t want to be spoiled, scroll on past.

I said in another post that I thought maybe the grisha in the cages was actually where the first army had turned on the grisha after Novokribirsk and judging from the opening line from Nikolai in this clip I am even more sure that is exactly what is going on. What is interesting is it looks like everyone believes that Alina and Aleks were working together which makes me think that this shot:

With what appeared to be a propaganda poster in the background might actually be like a news piece or even a wanted poster. If people do believe that Alina and Aleks were working together then maybe they are now actually both being hunted. Maybe the first army are searching for them and Aleks has now found himself in the same position he was in during that flashback in ep 7 of season 1, but Alina is also now in that position even after Aleks promised her he wouldn’t let her become the new heretic. I do wonder how this is going to effect darklina’s relationship. Like now that she herself is being hunted is it going to make her a little sympathetic towards Aleks or is there only going to be anger between them. She seems pretty angry at him here but I am curious to see what their dynamic is in these mind palace scenes and whether Alina will have moments where she is conflicted and can relate to Aleks and understands where he is coming from even if she doesn’t agree with him. I do feel like at the moment they both feel like the other betrayed them and I suspect at first they’ll both just be too angry but I do wonder if over time that anger will soften and Alina will start trying to listen more to Aleks’ side and vice versa.

Another thing this clip makes pretty clear is that it looks like that whole plotline of the Darkling working with Nikolai to find the sea whip and Alina and M*l being held captive on the boat has been cut. This opens a whole kettle of worms because that means no Ivan death scene, so are they just going to say in the show that he never made it out of the fold? It means Genya never lets Alina go which means the Darkling has no reason to scar her and we’ve seen pictures where it doesn’t look like she is scarred so does that mean they are just cutting that whole plot out too? It also changes how Alina and Nikolai meet and how Alina and Aleks reunite. From this clip my theory is that Nikolai has seen the poster and has captured them because of this and is maybe threatening to hand them over to the First Army and Alina is now bargaining with him. I wouldn’t be surprised if there is some kind of reward for their capture. I do think at this point Alina won’t know that it is Nikolai the prince and will likely think this is Sturmhond which is why she says he will be rewarded if he works with them, she thinks he’s just a pirate looking for his next pay out. Another possibility is that Alina sought Nikolai/Sturmhond out, maybe they did some investigating and asking around about whether there was someone who could be hired to help search and were pointed in his direction. Personally I think the first theory is more likely but you never know.

Another difference is it looks like Alina is the one hunting the other two Morozova amplifiers, again this is different in the books as she was very upset when she finds out that the darkling was looking for the sea whip to put on her and didn’t want it. I am glad for this change though as it does give Alina alot more of her own agency as opposed to the books where it felt more like she was being dragged form plot point to plot point by other characters. What did catch my attention though was when Alina brings up the sea whip to Nikolai, M*l goes to interrupt and stop Alina from saying anything further. It is obvious that he isn’t happy about something here. So my question is are they going the same route as the books and M*l has a problem with Alina hunting the other amplifiers because he thinks she is getting too power hungry, I mean he had some major issues with her having the sea whip amplifier in the books. Or is it just that he doesn’t trust Nikolai and doesn’t want Alina sharing their plans with him or what he considers sensitive information? Is it possible we could see some tension between M*l and Nikolai? I also wonder whether or not they are going to go with the whole Nikolai as a potential love interest thing or not and whether they’ll have the political engagement part. Honestly, personally I think Alina already has a more interesting dynamic with Nikolai in this 1 min clip than she does with M*l but I still don’t think they’ve got time with everything else they’ve got to cover to introduce a romance as well but who knows, we’ll just have to see I guess.

With them changing the whole search for the sea whip and cutting out Aleks capturing Alina and M*l though I can’t help but wonder/worry about what they are going to be doing with Aleks’ character instead. If he’s not on the boat with others searching for the Sea whip then where is he? What is he doing? It does look like from the trailer that he at least will be saving some of the grisha that were turned on by the first army but other than that we really don’t seem to have much of an idea on what Aleks is going to be up to this season. Honestly I am a little worried that we might not see much of his character and they are going to have cut his role right back which seeing as he’s the most interesting character to me would be a bit of a bummer for me personally. It also makes me wonder how and when he and Alina will reunite outside of the mind palace, but also when Genya and Alina will and what that dynamic is going to look like. Anyway I’m done rambling now, I’m still not sure how to feel about the new season, the closer we get and the more promo content they put out the more nervous I get but I am still holding out hope that I’ll enjoy the season, only two weeks left to go.

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone spoilers #darklina #anti malina #anti mal #s&b season 2 #s&b season 2 spoilers

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bardofavon · 1 year ago

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Can u do 18 about the about the name scène? "I want you to have it" / "give it to me". You had me at the edge of mu seat and I still can't stop thinking about it 😭

weird questions for writers

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end.

This is another verrrryyyy long response because I'm really taking you through every single change and where all my choices came from, so it's also under the cut!!

Okay so this is actually very funny because it's everyone's favorite part of the chapter, including mine, but it actually wasn't there originally. The scene was supposed to end after the line “I’m just wondering what other monstrous things you’ve merely let people think that you’ve done.”

So anyway there I am, 1am the night before my self-imposed deadline, and I finish the chapter. And it's...like...shorter than I would like it to be, and I didn't feel GREAT about it but I was really determined to update. And then the next day I copied it from my google docs to the "add a chapter" page on ao3 and I was doing my last read over before I posted it and I got to the part where Kaz gets weird about calling the Darkling "Darkling" in a conversation. And ORIGINALLY that was a seed I was planting to deal with later but I was like, "no, actually, they're going to talk about it now"

so I just took like an extra twenty minutes and banged it out on my keyboard before i went to the party i was supposed to go to meaning i didn't have time to overthink it.

originally, after Kaz says "give it to me," the Darkling tells him his name and Kaz repeats it and then they KISSED but then I was like.....no.....this is too soon (I KNOW IT'S BEEN 20 CHAPTER SINCE THE LAST TIME THEY KISSED BUT IT'S STILL TOO SOON!!!!) but it ALSO felt like the name exchange was still happening a little sooner than I wanted it to in my chronology.

it doesn't happen in canon until Ruin and Rising after a lot of shit happened, and it's not going to take that long here but I did want it to build a bit more.

It was important to Alina, obviously, but it feels like it's somehow more important to Kaz. Kaz is someone who also changed his name, shed his old identity, and knows exactly how much it means to share that with someone else. He's still angry, actually, that the Darkling knows his true name and used it to prove a point during an argument. So part of him wants the Darkling's true name as retribution, he wants to have something of the Darkling if the Darkling has something of his, but he also feels like the exchanging of the name would make them more equal in a way they weren't before.

It also does the double job of continuing to humanize the Darkling which is something he's subconsciously trying to do in his head because throwing his lot in with a tyrannical dictator who wants to destroy half the world is not great to stomach, and he thinks he'll sleep better at night if he can understand the Darkling's actual goals and who he is as a person and work toward something with him.

It would also give him a new bargaining chip, chess piece, puzzle piece, whatever you want to call it. It's information he doesn't have, and once he has it he's going to be better off because it's something he can use. He already knows if the Darkling is soft on him, having his name and using it in a conversation will pull things more toward his favor.

And of course, the part he would never admit to himself, he just wants to know it. He wants to know more about him, he wants to say his name, he wants to be that close to him.

Throughout the whole scene I wanted it to have that level of emotional vulnerability but I also wanted the exchange to kind of feel like a metaphor for kissing, in a way??? Kaz has all of these physical boundaries that can't be crossed, even if crossing them and making that physical connection will make him more powerful. The Darkling has emotional boundaries that can't be crossed, even if crossing them will help get him what he wants (which is Kaz).

In the end, I kind of like that even though they're both trying to work on these things and overcome them even when they get to a part within themselves where they might be able to take steps toward progress, they forget that there's also intrinsic factors keeping them apart too that are almost more monumental than what's going on inside their head, and that's where Sturmhond comes in.

Also, I knew I needed a confrontation between the two factions on the boat to keep the plot moving and this interruption felt like a good segue into that for the next chapter, oops, so sorry gamers.

it's also funny because me going "this could be a little longer, what if they kissed" is exactly how i wrote chapter 25 HAHA.

#a good myth is hard to kill #kazling #ask meme #i am having a lot of fun with this ask meme actually

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serpenteve · 2 years ago

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Last two questions i’m sorry, i hope i’m not bothering you

What do you think Aleksander would have done if at the start of them kinda circling each other or just early on she was like “you only like me because i’m the sun summoner and also immortal”? Would he even be self aware enough to seperate the difference between that and his feelings for her?

Also i keep seeing people saying that he just…never would have been able to be with her in a healthy way no matter what happened because time had just ruined his ability to relate to people, even potentially alina, in any way that they would have worked. I’m of the mind that everything would have worked out had bAgHrA not ruined everything. Book darkles maybe but show aleksander seemed like they could have really had a shot

Not at all! I love getting asks and speculating about things lol

I think answering both these questions depends a lot on your interpretations of the characters. I think the reason why there are so many different theories and interpretations of Alina and Aleksander (as well as other characters, tbh) is because neither are written consistently. At least with the Darkling you can say that he's the villain or that he plays his motives close to the chest to keep you guessing. But Alina is written pretty poorly and seems to only come to certain conclusions or take certain actions because the author needed her to do so for the sake of the plot. Very few of her actions and thoughts come across as an organic expression of her character---whoever her character is supposed to be.

That said, here's my personal take:

I don't think Aleksander could have separate out his feelings at the start because he's spent his entire 500+ year life being the only Grisha of his kind. As a summoner, it would have been very isolating as he mentions summoners usually work in pairs. Also, it's possible he lived most that life assuming he was alone and the myth of a Sun Summoner was just that---a myth. So when he discovered Alina, I really do think he had to radically rethink his entire life plan, his identity, his purpose, the meaning of all his centuries of being alone, etc. Like,,,,,,he really put all his eggs in the Alina-Is-My-Soulmate-And-We're-Gonna-Change-the-World basket ☠️

He was pretty distressed when she lost her powers at the end of R&R because I think it pretty much doomed him to an eternity of being alone.

However, with whatever crumbs we get in Rule of Wolves, it seems like even though Alina is no longer Grisha, he still feels attached and drawn to her because of how she challenged and bested him. I think meeting Alina made him feel something he had long forgotten: being human and being vulnerable and feeling like maybe there was someone in the world who could understand him, however brief that was.

I think he genuinely tried to see Alina as a useful human lightbulb in his geopolitical plans but then he caught feelings and those feelings caught him by surprise.

Being immortal and being hunted for so many centuries probably did erode his humanity over time and ruin his ability to relate to people. However, I like to think his love for Alina could sneak up on him when he least expected it. We never really saw them in an actual relationship with Alina in the books so it's kind of all speculation and fanfic at this point but I do I think they'd have reached a more equal partnership if the story was stretched out to be over hundreds of years where both characters can grow and change and influence each other along the way.

I could also see that happening within the text of Shadow & Bone had different writing choices been made and Alina being a different kind of character.

#viv answers #alina really is written so badly it hurts #its just surprising in a story where you have a 1st person POV and the worst written character is the damn narrator

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mlobsters · 1 year ago

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supernatural s7e4 defending your life (w. adam glass)

possessed car?? we did ghost truck i guess that's different enough. oh, no. ghost car. okay, the splat effects (and sound effects) on the titles - i have been itching to snark about. combining the splat of the ghost car victim and the titles is so goofy

okay. *argh* stop making me mad at you, dean. he was just railing into sam about not telling them about the hallucinations, but now he just lied to sam's face about jewel staite.

DEAN Some kind of ghost? DEAN With a license? License to kill. SAM Seriously?

why are they acting like that's weird. wasn't there a ghost truck that killed people episode already?? are they gonna talk about cassie???? (no)

SAM No. Just dirt. Could be "Christine"-like. DEAN Ugh. Even possessed cars can't do stairs. It's something spectral.

great minds

sam's hair, it's very fluffy and long and feathery, what's going on

DEAN I gave up AA for Lent. SAM We're not Catholic. DEAN Always with the details. AA gives me the jeebs. SAM Wow. Shocker.

so is this gonna be a very special episode where we acknowledge dean's alcoholism? (no)

DEAN Kind of makes you wonder if the guy wasn't drunk when he ran her over. SAM Yeah.

this episode has been full of weird pauses/moments focusing on reactions to things that may or may not have warranted the reaction that happened.

okay so i was like you know there's not a lot of pale red haired covered-in-freckles people in media, being a pale and covered-in-freckles person myself i do tend to notice, so i had to get a screenshot of the hands. my people's hands 😂 though his face does not look freckled in the same way but it's stupid hard to cover with makeup and still look vaguely skin-like... anyway. he's also been in altered carbon lol

altered carbon s1e4 force of evil - teach grant as jimmy desoto

what's going on with grumpy mcgrumperson dean. very special episode where dean learns people can actually grow and change? people like jewel staite and i dunno, sam?? (no)

DEAN Wow. I'd be so interested in that if I ate apples.

you really gonna have dean "pie's #1 fan" winchester say this?

DEAN I'm gonna check the bar. SAM To work or drink? DEAN I haven't decided.

i'm at the very special episode about alcoholism. i'm at the very special episode where dean tries to learn that people can change. i'm at the combination alcoholism and how people can change very special episode.

BARTENDER Love life or job? Two quick doubles, it's something. I'm Mia, by the way. DEAN Well, Mia, that is a complex question. I'm Dean, by the way.

lol. and plausible deniability

oh he's grumpy because he killed jewel when he told sam he wouldn't and that he trusted sam? because you should feel bad about the lying. and the not trusting.

BOBBY They identify the God Osiris. Real authoritarian type. He gets ahold of you, he's judge, jury, and executioner. Lore says that he can see directly into the human heart. He weighs the guilt. If he finds more than a feather's worth – boom, you're done.

weighing guilt, great. clear consciences all around.

DEAN It's been a while. But you owe yourself. It's nothing but a ground ball – you just got to put your mitt down. You are Dean Winchester. This is what you do.

hyping himself up for his hookup? kind of assumed that was still happening off camera.

aw, he's "sammy" in dean's phone

OSIRIS You and that waitress had quite a talk, huh? Get a couple drinks in you, and the guilt comes pouring out.

course it was too much of a real interaction to be anything other than a little plot device. this dude's voice/accent was very familiar, and aha.

the magicians s3e1 the tales of the seven keys - faran tahir as the great cock of the darkling woods

haha lawyer!sam what au fic is this

SAM Witness is being called without prior notice. DEAN Good one. SAM I saw that on "The Good Wife."

this is a weird episode. tone and message keeps bopping around.

SAM So why'd you start? To impress some loudmouth ass you just met... Or 'cause you wanted to be like your dad? JO Daddy issues. Definitely.

dean looking hurt/embarrassed about being called a loudmouth ass, hum. and same jo, same.

OSIRIS But were you or were you not happily out of the family racket until Dean showed back up in that gas guzzler? Ah-ah. The truth, now.

you know i like to talk about the money they have to spend to keep the impala fueled

OSIRIS But don't you think that your brother dragged you back into that catastrophic mess because he'd rather damn you with him than be alone?

okay but all that and dean i guess REALLY feels guilty about is killing jewel staite. not the torturing people in hell thing. or a million other things. so don't feel guilty that that's what made you guilty, dean -_- was inevitable

DEAN You were a kid. JO Not true. DEAN You and Sam. I just – you know, hunters are never kids. I never was. I didn't even stop to think about it. JO It's not your fault. It wasn't on you. DEAN No, but I didn't want to do it alone.

okay. no longer at the combination alcoholism and people can actually change very special episode. we're at the dean should not feel guilty for getting sam and jo into hunting very special episode? (eh?)

been a tick since their last scenic drink and chat date

SAM Look, I don't know what to tell you, Dean. I mean, I've spent a lot of time feeling pretty crappy – like, my whole life. DEAN What, you got a secret stash of happy pills? SAM Hell. SAM Look, I'm not saying it's logical. I just... you know, I feel like I did a lot of stuff I should have felt bad for, and then I paid a lot of dues and came out the other side, you know?

DEAN Well, I don't know whether to be, uh, jealous or weirded out. SAM You'll get used to it. I mean, I don't want to sound lame, but... I kind of feel good, Dean.

shut your mouth, sam, you know that's just asking for it. happiness is not allowed on this show. is this just denial though. foreshadowing something awful works all around

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 7x04 #adam glass #spnhiky #hiky #the magicians #faran tahir #amy pond #jewel staite #teach grant

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mercutiotakethewheel · 2 years ago

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hello! this is in regards to the darkling venn diagram. i completely agree with it and find it very amusing i just have a genuine question! am i missing the incesty vibes from aleks and baghra? i mean no disrespect but as someone who does dabble in those ships from time to time i just feel like i’m missing the incest subtext? this could also be because i haven’t read the books in two years!

so yeah, just curious is all :’) thanks!

/gen

I mean no there’s no incest-incest. Its def not something I think I’ve seen be shipped for nor would I want to lowkey lmao. Its a reference to like emotional incest, which is like that thing where, in this case, mothers do the whole “shes taking my son away from me” thing. Basically, its just when parents treat their children like partners or people they’re dating or vice versa. Other examples are like when men want partners who will cook and clean and emotionally support them for nothing in return (like a mommy). Or when Dads do the whole my-daughter-my-property shotgun on the porch shtick they do in country music. I don’t know realizing very quickly how weird it is to explain emotional incest. But yeah.

For Baghra and the Darkling specifically, there’s a lot of room to interpret Baghra telling Alina to run to “save her sons soul” or whatever as a whole getting rid of the gf so the son will just care about you. Which I feel like that reading is especially evident in the books because otherwise her motivation for doing that just doesn’t make sense, seeing as getting Alina out of the picture doesn’t exactly slow down his march towards coocoo bananas territory. In fact, it significantly picks it up.

But even though that part of it is more evident in the books I feel like, I put the emotional incest as more in the show mainly bc of: A) Baghra does the same shit with Luda, telling Aleksander it was a mistake to date him bc she isnt immortal like she and him are. Which really feeds into, for me at least, the idea that Baghra needs to be the only person Aleksander has because if she isn’t then he won’t care about her anymore, and he’s the only person she has. Which makes sense for a couple of immortals who have been thus far the only immortals Baghra knows (I don’t think Aleksander told her about Ulla). So it might be understandable and non-incesty, except that Baghra is specifically doing things that lend itself to that interpretation when she feels threatened by a potential romantic partner. And, b) Aleksander kind of seems to see their relationship the same way when in ep 5 he says “you don’t really matter now either” which kind of implies that he sees his relationship with Alina as a replacement for his with Baghra.

Which, like all the above could definitely be happening in the background for Book Darkling and Baghra, but we don’t really see their POV, so we don’t know. Though their dynamic is also really fucking weird in the book.

#aleksander morozova #baghra morozova #yeah idk how to explain emotional incest as a concept #except when parents and kids are weird about each other #but yeah #i hope tbis clears the venn diagram up #and im sorry to anyone who follows me who might see me pushing an analysis about incest #blah blah blah this is not my heart

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the-warlock-syndicate · 4 months ago

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Worldbuilding is kind of like doing math in reverse. You know the answer is 4, and your players will see 4. But in order for them to believe it, they will want to know the equation you used to get to 4. So make a note that 2+2 is your equation. And then if they start asking funny questions about 2+2, evade the question and use it as a plot hook for next session.

You start with the answer and have to figure out the question. You have decided that your campaign will have an evil lich. Consider the following questions your players might ask.

Where did the lich come from?

Why is the lich evil/what is the lich trying to do?

Why has nobody killed the lich yet?

Well, what produces a lich? Clearly he was an attendee of the Marrow Institute, a renowned college for necromancers.

Why is he evil? Well, because he is seeking to overthrow the king in favor of the King's younger brother, who is more beholden to the interests of the Darkling Alliance.

Why has nobody killed him? Because he is being protected by the Darkling Alliance, and it is politically impractical for the King to outright kill him, hence the hiring of an adventuring party who can provide deniability to the King.

You see the trick is to have the answers to the questions you know they will ask, and then prompt them to ask questions to which you already have the answers. You know that players will want to know the who, what, when, where and why of a major villain. So you provide those up front. But did you notice the trick there? The next obvious question, is what is the Darkling Alliance?

To which you answer, it is a center of power semi-integrated into the kingdom, of formidable mages and casters who are given royal permission to erect mage towers, and possess land in inhospitable areas, but with obligations to the throne of defense of the realm, like the marches of old.

And then your players see that you have thought this deep down, and are suitably impressed, but not necessarily interested in questioning you about the dry details of the bureaucracy, or vassalage system adapted to fantasy elements, or wherever you leave them.

But in my experience with worldbuilding, particularly for RPGs, it is about questions. Every time a question is asked, and an answer is formulated, a little bit more of the world comes to life. That does mean though that it helps a lot to have people to bounce ideas off, and have them ask questions from differing perspectives.

And of course, cribbing from history is a great way to make things seem realistic. A lich enacting a doomsday ritual is fantastical, and may well add stakes, but can be hard to worldbuild around. So, feel free to borrow motivation from say, the fanaticism of Jonestown. Or to go with the example I gave, medieval history is positively littered with examples of meddlesome nobles seeking to undermine royal authority, particularly in favor of a rightful claimant. Make the King tyrannical towards a group of nobles, the Darkling Alliance, slot the fantasy characters into the historical role of a March, with associated Marquis/Margrave/Marquess(fantasy language dependent), and now you get an easy way to characterize your BBEG as evil yet rational, establish the power structures in play allowing them to be a threat, establish the social structures you would expect others to adhere to with said characters, etc.

Do you have any advice for worldbuilding a fantasy setting, or any random ideas I could use? I’m working on my first dm campaign of the type, and am a bit stuck at the moment.

think about what kind of campaign you want to run first. I'll give you the example of my first setting

I want a campaign where the characters have to go around to get items that the bad guys are trying to get also, so they can be combined into a superweapon

What's a logical within-D&D-rules way to differentiate these items?

They're stones with different powers (this was pre Age of Ultron I promise) that align with the different schools of magic

What are they currently doing?

Influencing the world from their hidden spots

The different major cities of this land are themes around the different schools of magic

And then it just kind of evolved from there - Paper

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cheekygreenty · 3 years ago

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Hi, I just saw your prompt list for Shadow&Bone!! could you possibly do No. 2 from Angst, but like with a happy ending? Like reader n Kirigan are togeather but then Alina's comes along.. just, please let be happy at the end. I like angst, but my heart can't handle sad endings 😢😢 thank you!!! ❤❤

Future- The Darkling x Reader

(Very very angsty with a happy (?) ending. It made me cry a lil bit writing it ngl)

You trusted him, wholeheartedly. At least that's what you told yourself every day since she came to the Little Palace; the place you had always called home, where you felt safe from the prying eyes of the public.

Yet now, the place was fueled by harsh rumors of him and her. Everywhere you went you could hear a whisper, nobody tried to hide it anymore, the words were always entirely devoted to your crumbling union;

'I thought they were happy'

We were.

'How can he and Alina not be together, it's destiny.'

I'm starting to think so too.

You didn't acknowledge it. Just put on a sweet smile and a brave face. Don't let them see you're hurting. Even in your own home, you had to pretend and lie, which at the end of the day, when you laid in an empty bed, made you exhausted.

He told you she meant nothing more to him than a mere weapon. But that was when she first came and when he still managed to make it to your shared chambers and would whisper sweet nothings as you fell asleep.

It was different now, on more than one occasion you caught a glimpse of them together, him looking at her the way he always looked at you. However much he claimed to be a good actor and manipulator, there was something there and he couldn't deny it either.

You hadn't confronted him about it yet fearing that if you did, the truth would hurt and sting and make all those rumors true. In addition, you haven't seen him in days and the last time you did, he told you to stay away from the wonderful Sun-Summoner.

The truth was you knew deep down in your heart that she wasn't at fault. That she was not the root of the problem. You constantly fought with yourself to stop any hatred you felt towards her. She was lovely, kind compassionate, and innocent. She didn't deserve to feel your wrath.

But with that came the confusion of who to blame. You or Him. It made you tired and weak. The smallest of tasks made you drained and tears would well in your eyes at the thought of having to live another day like this, a day full of questioning yourself and the man you loved more than anything in the world.

No matter how much of a strong person you swore you were, this was taking a substantial toll on you. He had become your support network and he knew it, he loved it. He always said he finally felt appreciated when you came around, that he wasn't alone anymore. He had conditioned you to be this way. When times got tough, he was always your shoulder to cry on.

No doubt that shoulder was now next to Alina. Perhaps they went on a horse ride, visited the Black Heretic fountain, or were enjoying a rendezvous next to the lake.

You didn't want to know, all that mattered was that he wasn't there with you when you were falling apart. Maybe you relied on him too much.

You wondered if he noticed the whispers too, or the way you'd been missing crucial meetings, or even if he noticed you wearing your red kefta more often, ditching the black once you'd heard Genya speak of making a golden-black kefta for Alina, per the Darkling's request.

That was a punch in the gut. It hurt more than him avoiding conversation with you or even his deterrence of touching you. He had bestowed his colors to her when not even three months ago he didn't know she existed. It had taken you a long time to gain his trust and don his signature black yet all she had to do was waltz in and show up. And it hurt.

And now here you were, training the next generation of heartrenderers, as you did almost every day. You had given your life to the Little Palace and its Grisha and this is how you were being repaid. Not even Ivan, who you had shaped into an excellent soldier, had looked your way lately.

'Excuse me Ms. Y/L/N I have an urgent request from the General' You whipped your head around to the young Grisha boy with an obviously hurt look on your face which he couldn't understand.

'Of course' you choked out and took the piece of paper from his hands and watched him in sorrow as he left.

Ms.Y/L/N? what happened to moya sovereignny? You were never one to uphold the formality, but this was just another blow to your confidence. You were no longer referred to as his other half which only meant your position in the palace was quickly dwindling.

You opened the wax-sealed envelope and took out the thick sheet of paper. There was a time when he himself would deliver the news to you himself and use it as an excuse to spend extra time with you.

'I cannot make it to the meeting with the King this evening, attend and report back to me anything relevant, no horse business'

You scoffed loudly, drawing attention from the young Corporalki around you and leaned on the table in front of you. Not even a please or thank you. With the note clutched in your hand and tears of frustration in your eyes, you stormed out of the Corporalki room and towards his war room.

You peeked through the open door and seen him. He didn't look at all busy as he chatted with Zoya, Ivan, Fedyor, and some other Squaller you didn't recognize. Zoya threw her head back in laughter at something Fedyor said but Aleksander kept his stony expression. You threw the door open dramatically and everyone froze.

'Leave us' you cautioned as Aleksander's onyx eyes looked right into your own.

Nobody moved but Zoya was the first to speak ' Y/N, we're actually in a meeting if you couldn't tell' while everyone nodded along, except him.

You never had anything against anyone in that room, but in that moment you couldn't help yourself and used your small science to bring everyone to their knees in front of you, except him.

'Leave us' His voice rang out in the midst of their sharp breaths and chest-clutching. They scrambled to their feet and left one by one, Fedyor quietly muttering 'moya sovereignny' as he passed you which filled you with some courage. The door shut and the sound echoed over the walls.

You threw the note across the room and let it hit his arm. 'Did you forget your manners General? Or does it only apply to the people you claim to love?'

'Funny you should say that Y/N, you haven't attended any meetings in weeks without providing a reason. You're making me look like a fool'

'I'M MAKING YOU LOOK LIKE A FOOL?!' Your tears were now streaming down your face, falling quicker than you could wipe them away.

He stayed silent and that broke your heart even more, he could've said something, anything.

'Aleksander, I'm trying to keep myself together for everyone, I'm trying so very hard to appear normal and happy but I don't think I can do this any longer. The whispers and the rumors, watching you and her-' You slid down the door and sat on the floor, head resting on your knees. '-It's getting to me.... and it's killing me.'

You thanked the Saints you didn't see his face, for the silence spoke for itself. He didn't deny anything or reach out to comfort you. I've lost him.

'All I wanted was a happy ending.' You laughed a sad laugh that pulled at his heartstrings. With your eyes still facing away from him, you didn't see his hand go up to wipe the lone tear that fell down his face or the slight shake in his hands as he did so. He had no words that would comfort you. He knew what he'd done. He'd been avoiding you ever since he realized it. He didn't want to see you cry or see how his actions affected you.

Telling you that it means nothing to him was of no use. You had it in your mind now, forever engrained around his name, the rumors wouldn't stop and Alina was still around. He truly felt nothing of importance for her. All she meant for him was a key to a better future with you.

He approached you slowly, getting down on his knees next to you. He took your hand in his and held it up to his lips. He never prayed, but right now he silently muttered words to all the Saints. Don't let her leave.

'I'm so sorry Darling. Y/N I love you so much.'

'But you love her more' You yanked your hands away.

'NO. no. Y/N. I swear it. You are everything to me' He had grown serious now, he wanted you to look at him. He missed you.

'Then explain why you're parading her around like a Queen, letting her wear your colors, probably sleeping in her bed'

'I have never toucher her in that way. I'm yours Y/N.' Please look at me.

You lifted your head and looked at his beautiful face. He too looked tired, exhausted. His eyes were red and puffy. Saints, I've never seen him cry.

'You will have a happy ending. I promise Darling' He took your face into his hands and connected your foreheads together. 'I promise. I'm doing everything I can to make sure you will, and even if I can't, I swear you will you and our children-'

Children. Aleksander never spoke of them to the point where you had settled with the idea you'll never have them. Something about the desperation in his voice made you believe him, Aleksander was strong, he never gave up but he also never sacrificed himself for anybody. Up until now, you didn't think yourself worthy enough to be saved in exchange for him.

'-I would give up everything to see you and them safe, away from harm's way. Right now, the world doesn't deserve them, but once I do what I have to do, I'll give you children. However many you want, Just stay. Please'

You were borderline hysterical as you melted into his embrace. Weeks of frustration and hurt disappeared into thin air. Aleksander held you so tight you were having trouble breathing but you didn't care. He held you all day and all night. All meetings and tasks forgotten.

He explained everything in detail, from the stag and firebird to what happens if things don't go to plan. He kept nothing from you, not even the stress and pressure he felt. You comforted him as he always does to you. You fell asleep together and dreamed of a life with a happy ending, one where you never had to doubt his motives, you dreamed of your future.

Taglist (if you want to be added, plz tell me!)

@theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld

@0-artemis

#shadow and bone #grisha #imagine #the darkling #the darkling x reader #alexander #alexander morozova #alina starkov #fanfic #ben barnes #general kirigan x reader #black general

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atlas-of-a-human-soul · 3 years ago

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Draw your swords, pt.9

Summary: Darkling’s secrets are soon to be unveiled, just in time for a trip to the Fold.

Warnings: angst, swearing, mentions of alcohol, implied sexual content

Part one // Part two // Part three // Part four // Part five // Part six // Part seven // Part eight

=================================

The Darkling walked with a spring in his step. Residents of Little Palace have gotten used to his skulking in black keftas he wore like second skin. Never before had they seen him smile as much as he did on this particular day – as if he found the secret to happiness.

In truth, the Darkling refused to let himself hope for much. He simply hoped she’d allow him to kiss her now without receiving a death threat for it. It felt incredibly dangerous how foolishly addicted he is to his fickle wife. He never wanted anyone as much as he wanted her.

“General”, Fedyor joined him on his right, while Ivan silently took his left side. They both kept a reasonable distance from Kirigan, two steps behind at all times.

“What reason did you have to knock on my door this morning?” Kirigan’s voice is leveled, but his words are a death trap. There’s nothing more the general hates than his Grisha interrupting his private time – regardless if Y/N is with him or not. Unless there’s a burning issue at hand, he disliked being bothered unnecessarily.

“We’ve intercepted a few interesting stories you might like”, Ivan responds calmly, unafraid of his temperamental general. After all the years they’ve known each other, Ivan could read Kirigan’s mood easily. Despite his discontent, Kirigan is chipper for the first time in a long time. In fact, Ivan can’t even remember the last time his general was this happy...or happy at all.

“What kind?” Darkling asked, but his attention was undeniably divided as he caught sight of Y/N.

She walked across the hallway with a purpose – determined to raise hell and he found it incredibly sexy. She paused for a moment, her gaze meeting his briefly. When she pursed her lips, his twitched at the corners – a smile starting to form.

“Sun Summoner kind”, Fedyor spoke in a hushed voice.

Kirigan’s smile falters, his eyes leaving Y/N’s. “Follow me”, he barked on order before walking in the opposite direction.

All his life, the Darkling had been searching for the Sun Summoner. Every whisper of their existence turned out to be nothing but a fabrication, but something felt different now.

Once inside the map room, he leaned with his palms on the table. Kirigan didn’t say anything for a moment or ask for more information, but then his mouth moved on their own accord.

“Is it true?”

Glancing at each other, Ivan and Fedyor silently argued who should deliver the news.

“I asked you a question”, the general growled out, looking at them over his shoulder and the intensity of his glare had erased his earlier happiness.

“Nothing is confirmed yet, but we have quite a lot of accounts from the people surrounding the forest.” Ivan replied.

The Darkling made a sort of a grunting noise that Ivan didn’t know what to make of. The shadows covered the windows swiftly, engulfing the room in darkness as his left eye narrowed ever so slightly.

“The forest?”

Fedyor clears his throat, “Near the border.”

“Near the fold”, Ivan adds.

“I want”, he paused. Running his fingers through his hair, his shadows killed every source of outside light. “We need to prepare for a trip to the armies stationed at the fold.”

Nodding, Ivan looked to Fedyor and his deep-set frown.

“Are we to cross?” Fedyor asks.

The Darkling’s face is stone, his eyes unblinking. “Would it be a problem for you?”

Breath caught in his throat, Fedyor’s heart started to race. “No.”

“Good”, Kirigan remarked. “Prepare everything for departure in no more than a week.”

Sending them off, the Darkling sat in his chair. He wants so many things. His fingers graze his chin as he sighs – there would be no leaving without Y/N following. It’s not in her nature to do nothing and if she learns of the reasons behind his departure, he might lose her. The path of less resistance is to convince her the trip is to prove he’s honored his promise to her. He had sent the instructions yesterday and while she did force his hand on it, he didn’t hate her for it. If he’s bound for hell, at least it’s not a false one. She hates him, but she’s honest with him. He appreciated that.

Finding the Sun Summoner will change everything – for once, he will have a partner who can understand the weight of his past choices. He regrets too many things he’s done, but he was rarely given a choice. They broke the wrong parts of him, in the end, he showed them what happens when they laid a hand on those he cares for. That included Y/N now. If anything, she was a priority. Y/N is the only one he has left in this world.

While the Darkling pondered on the possibility of a Sun Summoner being true, Y/N sat in the library with a pile of books at each side.

The lingering effect of Aleksander’s gaze upon her and his devilish smirk had warmed her up in a way she least expected. For a moment, she couldn’t tell if time stopped or her heart did.

Shaking her head, she flipped the page in frustration. Her skin still burned bright from where he touched her. No amount of bathing can erase the fact she belonged to him now.

Swallowing thickly, she groaned. In all the books she had found, barely few had any information on the shadow summoner. Aside from Morozova creatures that serve as amplifiers, Y/N found mere mentions of a black heretic and the creation of the fold.

Her neck hurt, her eyes felt like they’re being pierced with needles and there was no saving her mind from all the theories she concocted. Leaning back in her chair, she huffed. Rubbing her eyes, she slammed the book closed before standing in frustration.

She didn’t want to love Aleksander, to risk her heart and life. She didn’t want to lay in bed, always afraid of what he might do if one day she’s not careful enough and he learns the truth. Naively, she hoped he’d either stand with her or just walk away but that’s not the Kirigan she knows. He wouldn’t forgive, it’s not in his nature.

Placing the books where she can find them in the morning, she headed to her room. Genya was kind enough to send a servant with lunch, but Y/N missed dinner entirely. Engrossed in books all day, she hardly felt any hunger.

At least not the kind of hunger food could satisfy.

Walking into the room, she hadn’t expected to find Aleksander sat at the bottom of their bed….shirtless.

Standing, he narrowed his eyes at her. “You weren’t at dinner.”

She raised a brow, “Wasn’t hungry.”

Kirigan crossed his arms over his bare chest, the movement making the muscles in his stomach flicker.

“Get dressed”, she quipped.

He smiled, “Do I make you uncomfortable?”

“I’m surprised you don’t have a mirror in every corner of this Palace, since you love yourself so much.”

He laughed wholeheartedly as she just turned away, clamping a hand over her mouth. She couldn’t let herself laugh with him. Every moment like this feels like the world is spinning, making her resolution fragile. She’s aching to let him in, but it would be a mistake. She feels it in his bones, he’s not honest with her.

Caring for a man like him is dangerous, like standing in the eye of a hurricane.

“We’ll leave Little Palace in a week”, Aleksander speaks, “Just as you asked of me.”

She stares at him, disbelief and joy colliding. And it’s the look in his eyes, the hopeful, terrified look in those dark skies that disarms her.

“Why do I feel like there’s a catch?”

Running the tip of his tongue along his lower lip, Aleksander takes a step closer. “You’ll ride with me.”

Pursing her lips, she nods without ever breaking eye contact. “And?”

A breathless chuckle passes his lips, “You’ll have to wear a special kefta. One that won’t let you get hurt easily.”

Taking a deep breath, she tilts her head up, “And?”

Suppressing a smile, he raises an eyebrow. “You’ll be equipped with a weapon of choice. I believe you’re more than familiar with guns as a soldier of the First army.”

Raising both eyebrows in response, she takes a step closer to him. “Swords”, she notes.

Humming, his eyes widen ever so slightly as he waits for her to continue.

“I prefer swords”, she touched his face gently with the back of her hand.

“Of course”, he breathes out. A soft smile spreads across his lips, “Draw your swords if you see an enemy in sight.”

“Even if it’s my husband?” Her lips remain parted, her eyes flickering to his chest where she raised her hand to.

“I don’t care, as long as you keep yourself safe.”

She held her breath as his words resonated with her mind. How can he be so callous one day and then offer up his life for her to take. No game had ever made her question every single word that left someone’s lips before. Sometimes she’d look at him and see through the mask he shows the world and other times she couldn’t see anything other than her own reflection in his eyes as if his soul didn’t exist at all.

“Since when do you care?” She frowns, gnawing on the inside of her cheek.

Letting out a heavy sigh, his eyes flicker to the hand she splayed against his bare chest. Just the simple touch of her hand made him want more. It was becoming too hard to pretend he hates her. What he truly hates is how human she is – what is he supposed to do when her hair turns grey and he’s still young? How will he survive when someone takes her to exact vengeance against him? Will he be too late to save her then?

When your world comes to a stop and the value of life is amplified by those dead before their time in gruesome ways, it feels like an earthquake shakes the very foundations life is built on. But when the walls start falling, past and future no longer exist, only the moment you’re in and the first person that comes to mind when those walls are gone is what your life is all about. For Aleksander, that person is Y/N.

Looking into her eyes, his hands cup her face, “Since I had to spend five days believing you’re dead.”

He wanted to wrap Y/N in his arms and tell her he would never let her walk away, not after he had a taste of what it means to be with her. He wanted to tell her his love is unconditional and that his soul is hers, even if she didn’t want to give him hers. He would wait, as patiently and as stubbornly as he did by now and that she will never lose him because even if he wished, he can’t scrub his heart clean of her. And he never wanted to.

“I thought you’d protect me?” She raised an eyebrow, teasing him.

She had become his heart, his reason to live. She lit a fire within, something he had lost over time and while she’s completely unaware of it, if the world tried to take her from him, the Darkling would wage war to make sure she remains by his side.

Blinking slow, a faint smile upon his lips, the Darkling tilts his head slightly to the left. “Would you allow it?”

There is nothing in the world he wanted more than to kiss her again, but this time around Aleksander decided to let her make the move. She is tender, but fierce. To understand a woman like her, one must realize that the former is who she is and the latter is what life demanded of her.

“Not likely”, she remarks and he throws his head back, chuckling.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she wets her lips in thought and he can’t help but think this is a well-designed trap for him to say the wrong thing and for her to use it as excuse to put distance between them rather than face her own desires and he was almost certain those desires included him.

“You want me”, he whispers in her ear as his fingertips slide up her spine and to the back of her neck, “And it’s killing you.”

“Physical attraction means nothing”, her voice is low, but unwavering.

Aleksander bites the inside of his lower lip in anticipation of her pushing him away and storming off, but even as he waits, he feels her hips press closer to him as if she’s telling him he won’t be left alone. Not again.

“Yet you’re here”, he grins. Tucking her hair behind her left ear, he admired how firm she stands in her opposition.

“So are you”, she quipped,.

A cocky smile appears on his lips, tiny wrinkles forming around his dark eyes as he holds her gaze bravely, unwavering even when her gaze becomes a glare.

Biting her lower lip, contemplating the right move, Y/N could hardly fight her desire for him. Her head knew he it would be unwise, but her heart screamed at her to kiss him and those butterflies in her stomach felt more like killer bees as the need to feel him inside her had taken over every rational thought she generated.

One hand caressing his lean cheek, she gave into her primal instincts as she slammed her lips against his and Aleksander’s own heart leapt inside his chest.

Their need for each other was urgent. Y/N grabbed a handful of flesh and muscle on Aleksander’s back. He gasped and laughed throatily at her haste. When her hands clawed at him again, he grasped both hands in one of his and held them over her head. She struggled to free herself, but he was too strong. When he entered her, she gasped, then moved her hips up to meet his.

He released her hands and she pulled him closer and closer to her. They made love quickly, almost harshly, before they found the sweet release they longed for. Aleksander collapsed on top of her, their bodies still joined as one when their minds gave in, slowly drifting to sleep.

Just like the previous morning, he remained in the bed, his arms wrapped around her tightly.

She barely saw him during the day as the week progressed, but their nights were spent together – entangled mess of limbs, desperate moans and needy pleas neither held back. She’d close her eyes in his embrace and begin her day the same way.

“You don’t have much time”, Genya warned as Y/N dressed in haste. She decided to dress for the trip, it was the only way she could fit in a few hours in the library.

“I won’t be long”, she smiled at her friend.

Licking her lips, Genya took her by the hand. “What is it that you’re looking for?”

Y/N clenched her teeth, wondering if she should tell Genya. Something inside her warned against it – she didn’t tell anyone his name is Aleksander, feeling privileged to know such information. If she’s wrong and she can trust him, she didn’t want to poison anyone else with her doubt beforehand. A single book remained unread on her pile of very thick books she went through.

“Just trying to learn”, Y/N shrugged.

Nodding, Genya smiles, “In case we don’t see each other before you leave, I have to implore you to reconsider David as an ally.”

“I will”, Y/N promised and she would. Someone in Aleksander’s inner circle could be of use to her.

Going through the pages, she felt exhausted. Spending all her time in ancient books didn’t seem to be of use, but for once the text made sense. It spoke of the black heretic and the many names he’s been called in history.

“He walks the earth with a power only the saints could possess. They call him The Black Heretic, The Shadow King, The Starless Saint, Staski, Eryk, Leonid – numerous names that he exchanged for each lifetime he was given and by now it must be at least a few hundred lifetimes of darkness. His name – true name was lost throughout the centuries, occasionally heard as a whisper carried in the wind.”

Wide eyed, she read through the text of a scholar who described the Black Heretic and his powers, his entire lineage being his mother who remained unnamed and…him.

“He has no descendants?” Y/N’s lips quiver. If he has no descendants and his line begins and ends with him, how would Aleksander even exist?

Unless…

No.

It would be impossible, would it not?

“Numerous names that he exchanged for each lifetime he was given”, she reads aloud only to cover her own mouth in face of a startling epiphany. It was as she noticed the dark connection between the great mystery, the horrific realization set in.

“Pardon me, miss, but General Kirigan has sent for you”, a servant frightened her.

Taking the book in haste, Y/N stood on her shaky legs. Mouth dry, she pressed her lips in a thin line.

“Thank you”, she walked out so quickly, barely containing her quick and shallow breaths. Sweating profusely, she felt as if the black kefta she wore weighed down on her like battle armor.

Was it not her armor? Was this not a constant war she’s struggled with?

Aleksander…Kirigan…The Darkling…who is he?

“Are you ready?” Aleksander is waiting by the door with a small smile on his lips. His hand is opened for her to take, but she ignores it. If she took his hand, he’d feel the shakiness she’s trying so hard to steady.

Mounting his black stallion, she tucked the book safely inside her inner pocket.

“I’ll take the reins”, she informed him as he took his place behind her.

She heard him scoff, “I’m the general.”

Is Aleksander even his real name?

Are the stories about him true?

“On this side of the fold, so am I”, she gripped the reins and the stallion obeyed.

Riding a horse always helped her clear her mind, but this time it seemed impossible.

When she married Kirigan, she believed she would marry an old, unattractive man…As it turns out, she got the old part right.

=============================

A/N - I’m not quite happy with this chapter, but I wanted to post today to keep my streak going. Also, i suck at writing a summary, like WHY IS THAT?! xD It’s Eid, so I’m tired and sleepy, forgive my grammar and prepare for things to heat up in the next chapters. Thank you all for sticking with the story and all the feedback, it honestly gives me life and will to keep writing. I also finally found the books in my native tongue, at least the Grisha trilogy and Six of crows duology and I’m really excited to dive into it and further my understanding of Darkling as a brilliantly written villain that is a multi-dimensional being with, let’s be honest, actually good points. I may not be happy about his willingness to commit mass murder, but I kinda see where he’s coming from and I really can’t wait to know more about the situation as it is in the books.

Tags: @bruxa0007 @rangotangomango @kaitlyn2907 @thestoryofmylife9 @shelivesindaydreamswme @hxrgreeves @safetyhtom @kaqua @savannah-elliott @all-art-is-quite-useless @azure23x @girlmadeofavocados @ashdab2611 @acciorudolphx @ladyblablabla @wckedheart @xceafh @sanna2020 @tarkanelima-blog @takethee @mellifluous-cosmos @marvel-ousnesss @tea-effect @starlightofsolaria @p3nny4urth0ught5 @blackbirddaredevil23 @sarcastic-and-cool @slytherinsbiggestproblem @within-thehollowcrown @notthatchhavi @musicconversedance @freakytillthemoon @lgkoval @honeyofthegods @queenmalhinewahine @misselsbells06 @whatthefluffrichard @aami98 @britriestbr @itsfangirlmendes @padme-parker @readingsssssssss @runawayolives @thehighladyofasgard @emlynblack @keithseabrook27 @dailydoseofchoices @deceivedeer @olympiacosplay @pansysgirlfriend @extrakyloren @daybleedsintonightfa11 @thoughts-and-funnies @weirdowithnobeardo @folkloresworld

PART 10

#the darkling x reader #the darkling fanfiction #aleksander morozova x reader #aleksander morozova #general kirigan #general kirigan x reader #shadown and bone

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ignyxdaughter · 2 years ago

Text

𝐗𝐈𝐈𝐈 - 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐓

(𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 /𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐤𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐳𝐨𝐯𝐚 𝐱 𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐨𝐧)

MASTERLIST

READ ON WATTPAD

summary: Kirigan and Katherine have a curious talk, but, due to interruptions, they schedule a another meeting. Agatha is excited for finally reuniting with someone that truly knows her.

word count: 3442

warnings: grisha/witch hunt, blood

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

They entered the Little Palace through the Darkling's personal door chambers, not wanting to be seen nor bothered by anyone. Kirigan had only told a Heartrender, one of his personal guards, to not be disturbed. The man nodded and went away to spread the General's order, but Katherine felt his gaze burning her back.

She has a feeling that she'd already interacted with the Darkling while this Corporalki was near him, but couldn't remember that at all. However, little does she know that this is true. Ivan — along with Fedyor — was one of the Heartrenders that were shocked to present the first time that Kirigan wasn't annoyed or bothered by an otkazat'sya servant clumsiness. The two Corporalki privately discussed that event, both having no idea of what had happened that day.

When they finally got into the General's office, he circles the wooden desk until his chair, making Katherine feel obligated to sit down at the one in front of him. The Darkling's silence, analyzing every movement of hers to decide what he's going to say first.

After a tense minute, where both of them just look at each other without a word, he breaks the silence with a question: "Who are you?"

Your equal, the witch thinks.

Instead, she answers: "Someone that wants to fight for my people."

He raises an eyebrow, intrigued. "You don't seem Grisha."

"I am not."

"Then who are your people?"

"The ones that just want to survive."

That catches his full attention, making him fight the urge to lean over the table to get closer to her. The Grishas are the only ones he knows that fight for survival and for a place to live in peace. And since that woman said she isn't a Grisha, then what is her?

"We hide to live. Lie to survive. Although Ravka is a safe place for Grishas, it isn't for my kind."

"Nonsense."

"It isn't nonsense when it's true." Katherine tries to breathe without trembling. "Especially when you're threatening to end our security."

There it goes. The thought that he is the villain of every narrative in this world. The disgust for his deeds, no matter how much they helped the Grisha on their quest to conquer a place to call paradise.

Kirigan can already feel the hatred towards this woman starting to corrode his insides. She's one of the ignoramus people that blindly believes that the world before the Fold was better for the Grishas, that the hunts were like nowadays — less atrocious — and there were no fights for survival between Grishas.

If there's anything the General hates more than hunters and traitors is this kind of people.

"You're ready to cease the peace we lived through so many centuries, one of the only things that protect us from the bastards that wish to torture and murder us." Disdain starts to fill Katherine's veins as she remembers the stories of many supernaturals of what Ravka was like before the Unsea.

People accusing each other, riots in villages for someone to be condemned, supernaturals fighting with themselves to survive, friends betraying friends for fear of being thrown at the gallows or at the stake... The list of heinous cases just goes on and never seems to end.

"You want to dissolve the Fold with your lightscu— Sun Summoner." She quickly forces herself to say the right term. "And I want you to rethink—" end "that decision."

Kirigan's breath stops for a moment. That's not what he was expecting at all. Usually, people want the Unsea gone to navigate through the waters without fear of being killed. However, this woman wants it to stay how it is and change nothing.

Wait. It's not just her. Her people wish the same.

An entire species, then? And if they aren't Grishas nor otkazat'sya like she said, what are they?

The Darkling has a whirlwind of questions in his head. He needs answers, to know about the life of this mysterious woman and all her people who, apparently, have the same intentions as him. An entire population can become his ally.

You're ready to cease the peace we lived through so many centuries— She has said. One of the only things that protect us from the bastards that wish to torture and murder us.

Finally someone understands the danger of dissolving the Fold and disdains the silly narratives of those who never lived through such a dark period for Ravka! This is a miracle! For Saints sake, not even his mother comprehends that!

But there are only two ways to know this: having heard accounts of Ravka before the Fold, or having lived in that period.

"You're silent." The witch's voice takes him away from his reveries and makes him look at her, who's admiring his office while walking through it. When has she stood up? Was he so immersed in his thoughts to not notice this?

"What are you?" Katherine turns to him in awe, yet confused. That's a very broad question. "You said yourself that you're not Fjerdan nor Shu Han, and I doubt you're Ravkan. Though you speak marvelously and have a good backstory to not know some common habits, there's something... uncertain about you." He analyzes her from top to bottom, skepticism all over his face. "It seems that you're lying about your nationality, Ms. Anya."

She narrows her light green eyes at him in an attempt to conceal a surprise. Katherine had indeed thought he wouldn't discover that lie of hers. And if he's doubtful about that little untruth that rolls off her tongue so naturally, he's skeptical about more lies than she had considered.

The witch weighs on a balance the consequences of telling the truth in this case. If she insists to him she's indeed Ravkan, he'll doubt her more and jeopardize this already fragile alliance. On the other hand, if she tells him the truth, he'll want to know more about her and invest in tricks to make her deny her own lies.

After a minute, the shadow singer takes a deep breath, her decision made. "You're right. I am not Ravkan." She faces him without nervousness. "I am British. English, specifically."

To anyone, Kirigan's face would've seemed normal, amused at its maximum. However, Katherine's captured a slight glint of shock in his features. He must be replaying her sentences in his mind while questioning what on Earth she's doing in Ravka.

"You seem surprised", the woman breaks the silence without looking away from his face. "Please tell me, General, what were your guesses on me. I'm quite curious now."

"I thought you were at least Russian." His statement made her lips quiver in a small smile.

"Ketterdam?"

For her amusement, he chuckled. "You're too refined for that city, Ms. Anya."

"Although I do prefer big and developed cities, I can survive Ketterdam." He looks at her in skepticism. "I'm telling the truth. Compared to some... situations I have been in, Ketterdam is heaven."

"I might state the same, then. But changing subjects now, I can't help but wonder what's your real name." She frowns to pretend innocence. "Anya doesn't suit you. It seems wrong on you, especially for a British lady."

"Kirigan seems wrong on you too." He couldn't reprimand his eyes widening. "Is Gaelic, isn't it? It means black."

"What are you implying, Ms. Anya?"

"Oh, me? Nothing. I'm stating facts." Katherine leans on her chair to be closer to him. "This is a name that suits your power, which means you've spent some time searching for it. After all, old Gaelic names are not that popular. To my amazement, you're the only Kirigan I've ever heard of."

He has to gather all of his patience to not slap this woman, and somehow, he thinks she's doing the same. "I don't like to repeat myself, Ms. Anya. Answer my question."

"You're older than everyone thinks. You're not 120 years, as you say."

The Darkling feels his blood run cold. Since he gained power in Ravka, no one has ever doubted his past. Every person followed the silly story he'd made to cover the truth. However, just in this conversation this woman has managed to put the pieces together and — almost — complete the puzzle of his life.

Kirigan knew that knowledge and cleverness are developed with time; it's two characteristics that if you don't practice enough, you'll never get them. It took him almost two centuries to gather all his wisdom and know the perfect moment to use it — never too early or too late. You have to be shrewd to detect a lie and search for exactly what you want in the person who said it.

This woman in front of him knows this, she has knowledge and cleverness together in her mind. She has the behavior of a manipulator: lies naturally roll out of her tongue. Moreover, her fake personality seemed real in the Little Palace, along with all the pretense of being an otkazat'sya. For a short period of time, she managed to deceive him and all trained guards.

There were few times that the General clashed with someone's wit. The times when someone was actually on the same level as he were even smaller. Furthermore, he could count on one hand how many had managed to gather real information about him, about his life.

In just a few minutes of conversation, this woman shifted its focus from her to him. She turned his own game in her favor. With her gift of the gab, she's discovered more about him than he wanted to share with anyone.

There's only one way that she has such an analytical behavior.

She had lived as long as him.

That would explain not only this situation, but also her smartness and why she's never backed off of him. That woman hasn't shown apprehension nor nervousness at any moment by his side. She was bold enough to accuse him of stealing "her" books at his face without dreading its consequences withal.

She doesn't fear him. And he doesn't know if that's an act of silliness or courage.

"They are naive enough for you to puppet them, but I'm not." Katherine continues without breaking eye contact. "Unfortunately for you, General, I'm no fool. I cannot be manipulated."

"How old are you?" That's the only thing he managed to say in a heat wave of shock. There's been ages when he wasn't so astonished.

"Centuries", she smirks. "Just like you. Though I think you're older than me."

"And why do you have such thoughts?"

The witch shrugs. "Intuition."

He opened his mouth to reply to her, but was interrupted by a knock on the door. "Yes?"

Ivan entered with an annoyed look on his face. "The tsar requests your presence in the meeting, moi soverenyi."

That child cannot do anything by himself! He mentally scolds the monarch.

He controls the urge to roll his eyes. It's unbelievable how he'll have to replace such an interesting conversation with a boring one. The tsar may want his presence just to compliment his opinions — which will certainly not happen.

Kirigan slowly faces the woman in front of him. "Unfortunately, I must go now, though I'm sure we can rearrange another encounter."

Katherine nods in understanding. "Meet me before dusk in the fountain."

"I'll be there." He assures her and stands up to go to that hideous meeting. "Ivan will secretly escort you out of the Palace."

She doesn't oppose him, yet obediently seated on the chair, waiting for him to leave and be accompanied by the Heartrender. However, when The Darkling is almost crossing the doorway, she mutters:

"Ekaterina." He stops on his tracks, not able to conceal more surprises. The woman gracefully stands up while looking at him. "That's the Russian version of my name."

He gives her a quick nod before heading to the royal office. And even with the entire court almost making his ears bleed with all the unimaginable nonsense in this world, his mind only thought of her. Of her confident words, of her elegant behavior, of her light green eyes gazing at his dark brown ones. But most of all, of her last phrase.

Ekaterina is the Russian version of a very common British name, one that's impossible to not have heard of it.

Katherine.

Her name is Katherine.

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

"So—", she locks the bedroom door and looks at her cousin "tell me everything."

"Agatha—"

"Why did I want to go to Russia? Where are the others?"

"Agatha, that's not how—"

"Why the hell are they hiding?" There's a momentary pause, and she gazes at the redhead with a frown. "Are some of our enemies here too?"

"That's not how it works, Agatha!" Hope regrets yelling as soon as she sees her cousin shrink a bit. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have screamed."

"No." The dark skinned woman sits on the bed, looking down at her lap. "I was being annoying."

"You're curious. It's different." She shrugs, and Hope sighs, sitting by her side. "We can't help you."

"But you said—"

"The spells that recover something that shouldn't come back have a price. Like necromancy: a soul for a soul."

"A memory for a memory." Agatha's stomach twists at the realization.

"It's not always that; there are some that give your memory in flashes."

"I don't want that."

She chuckles. "I know, and that's why we're trying to find another one. We want a spell that doesn't affect you. But for that, you have to remember things naturally as much as possible."

"So they won't go away when you cast the spell?" The tribid nods. "At least tell me how they are, then. Please."

Since her cousin now remembers the family and only wants to know if they're fine, Hope tells her how things are going. She says how Nick is trying to stay strong as much as possible and the times Levi has to hold him to not invade the Little Palace and jump on Agatha. Informs how Michelle is spying on some people in Ravka in search of a good wizard, how Levi is contacting every ally he knows to get a safe memory spell, and how Katherine is staying up all night trying to find that as well, but in grimoires.

The redhead also explains to her that they didn't tell any of their uncles and aunts to not worry them. If they become aware of the news, chaos will explode. They'll all go to Ravka and not act discreetly. Heads would roll, blood would be sucked out, memories would be erased, hearts would be ripped out, and some limbs would be severed... All of that in front of everyone to impose the Mikaelson power. After all, the family always leaves a track of chaos wherever they go.

Due to that, the cousins have decided to just call them if nothing works on Agatha.

"I can't tell you stories—", Hope smirks at an upset Agatha "though I can confirm them."

The hybrid brown eyes widen. "Really?"

"And I can help you to remember too. We can go to places that can unlock your memories. How does that sound?"

Her lips quiver in a genuine smile, happiness finally making Agatha's — preciously tense — body relax. Finally she's going to have some help from a person that really knows her, that lived with her since they were children and learnt together how to control their powers. Although she won't tell any story, just the company of Hope is ensuring for the hybrid, meaning that she's not alone in a different country anymore.

The family will pass through this with her, and will fight with all their strengths to get her memories back. Because they're always and forever.

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

It's almost dusk when Katherine arrives at the fountain. She came early to analyze the forest to guarantee a good conversation with The Darkling, without any interruptions. This is a less comfortable place than the Palace, where the eerie silence makes you listen to anyone's approach. Also, the witch's escape plan can go better if the General tries to attack her; she has more strategic corners to hide and more space to fight and defend herself.

The woman sits on the fountain for a few minutes, attentively observing the landscape. If there's one thing she learnt in life it's to never get your guard down, no matter how amazing the situation is or how good people are. If you let your strong defense rest for a minute, enemies can take advantage of that and attack you.

All your achievements will turn into ashes of the past. Moreover, there will be more chances of you getting blackmailed, tortured or murdered.

A sudden rustle of the leaves makes Katherine stand up in alert. She's not alone anymore.

It's not him. One of her shadows whispers.

That's all she needed to know. Whoever this person is, they aren't The Darkling, which means she must get rid of them before he arrives.

"Whoever you are, I suggest you leave." She slowly distances herself from the fountain, analyzing the trees where the person might be hidden behind.

No response. But the witch knows they're still here. She can feel their shadow; quiet, alert and ready to attack.

"You shall not come back home if you threaten me. Leave before you regret it."

The woman quickly recoils as soon as she sees the silver glow. But even her quickness didn't stop her from being hurt. The metal of the blade scraped against her left arm, ripping her skin enough to cut through the fabric of her clothing and smear it with blood.

Katherine lets out a shriek of pain, but quickly looks at the spot where the dagger came from. Fury begins to take over her, her fingers crunch, itching to grab the weapon on the floor to kill its owner.

"Drüsje!" The attacker yells from behind the tree. She learnt enough Fjerdan to know the meaning of this word.

Witch.

Her attacker is a drüskelle, a man that hunts Grishas because they "insult Djel". Therefore: someone that doesn't deserve mercy.

That'd explain why he aimed her arm: to disable her from using her hand. Grishas can only practice Small Science when their hands are free, but witches and wizards can cast spells without them. Their minds are the only thing they need to hurt a person.

She picks up the dagger and marches towards the hunter, using the blade to deflect the others thrown. The witch wants this to last, that every minute that every weapon that doesn't hit her makes the man feel that his death is coming. She wants him to experience the same fear and agony that all drüskelle victims feel. So Katherine won't use magic against him yet. She will only do so when looking into his eyes. The creature he hates so much must be the last thing every witch hunter should see before they die.

Their last breath needs to be before their greatest enemy to know that they lost the fight.

The man finally comes out of hiding. His jaw is clenched with hatred, one the woman reciprocates towards him. It is visible that his blades have run out, which has left him to try his luck with her.

"Don't worry." The Shadow Singer says. "You will pay for everything you've done."

"Drüsje demjin!"

That was enough for the hunter to shoot her. Well, try to shoot her, as she quickly managed to dodge and run towards the man to stab him. She had no more patience, she couldn't bear anymore to breathe the same air as someone so repugnant. The witch wanted him bleeding on the floor while she casted the most painfull spells in him till death.

A quick wind blows her hair forward, the dark brown strands blocking her vision enough that she can't see clearly. She removes them from her face in time to witness a beam of darkness hitting the man.

There's been decades since Katherine was impressed by a fighting technique and finds it truly good. But this one not only surprised her, it startled her as well. Her breath caught in her lungs, her light green eyes widened and the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. It's the same feeling that ran through her when she first saw her father rip out a living person's heart.

Fast, silent and lethal. A blow that guarantees certain death.

But, as incredible as it may seem, this one is more violent than ripping out a heart or beheading someone. Because the drüskelle is now split in half.

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

A/N: Hey, guys! How are you? I just want to thank you that are reading and enjoying. I can't believe there are people that like my writing! I also wanna say that the Fjerdan words in this chapter were taken from Grishaverse Wiki, so forgive me for any mistakes.

A/N: English is not my first language. I’m gonna mix the books and the tv show to make the story line clearer (I read soc, the grisha trilogy and its tales). I don’t own Shadow and Bone and TO/Legacies characters; they’re, respectively, Leigh Bardugo, L. J. Smith and Julie Plec. Also, this is how I think the Darkling is,and some of the events will be changed due to the story's course!

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #darkling fic #the darkling #darkling x reader #darkling x oc #the darkling x reader #the darkling x oc #aleksander morozova #aleksander morozova x reader #aleksander morozova x oc #general kirigan #general kirigan x reader #general kirigan x oc #the vampire diaries #the originals #legacies #the mikaelsons

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aleksanderscult · 9 months ago

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People accuse the Darkling of...

⚠️TW!: Genocide, sexual assault and abuse⚠️

People accuse the Darkling of lacking empathy.

Well that's what immortality does to you, my friend. The human brain is not designed for this kind of thing. It's miraculous that he wasn't insane by the start of "Shadow and Bone".

He also willingly stopped feeling emotions because they distracted him from his goal.

Furthermore, he was raised by a mother that kept telling him to never believe in love and always tried to isolate him from people he could bond with.

And I don't think you call someone "unfeeling" when he seems concerned about what will happen to Ravka and the Grisha or when you remember his reaction to his mother's fall or when he saw the woman he loved lose her entire soul, her very being right in front of him. The man could feel. But his emotions were buried deep within.

People accuse the Darkling of being a murderer.

Yes, he was, I agree.

But so was Alina, so was Mal, so was Nikolai. Everybody killed people.

"But Nikolai didn't kill out of evilness"

Neither did the Darkling. He didn't do it because he enjoyed it, he wasn't a sadist. He killed because he was fighting a war. At times of peace (if there was any in Ravka) he didn't go around shooting people out of boredom.

People accuse the Darkling of lying to Alina.

He lied to Alina because she was a new and, apparently, naïve person that he couldn't just trust from day one. He was the leader of an army that was already in danger of being hunted down if the King changed his mind. Why should he trust her? Why should he tell her his secrets? Is she his lieutenant? Is she part of the royal council? No, I don't think so.

"He lied to her about who he is!"

Isn't that the same lie he was telling to literally everyone for 400 years? You say it like he did it because he had something personal against her. It really shows how clueless all of you are for the matters of politics and ruling. Read a book ffs.

People accuse the Darkling of committing genocide.

He didn't. He was actually a victim of one.

I can't believe this accusation even exists

People accuse the Darkling of being a sexually creep towards Alina.

Aside from the fact that neither I nor the author herself consider him as one, are we talking about those moments where they already were enemies? Do you know what an "enemies-to-lovers" trope is? Do you know that in this kind of trope attraction and aversion are the primary ingredients?

Or the fact that, in the Grishaverse, the very rules of consent are different. How can you or anyone put modern laws into a fantastical universe where people with magical powers exist and things are run differently? Each universe has its own setting, structure and rules. Why are you putting your contemporary ideals and ethics there? What are they even doing there in the first place?

People accuse the Darkling of being manipulative towards Alina.

If you accuse him as such, could you please DM me the passages from the book where he did that? Because even I can't find them.

And I'm talking about before his big reveal as the "villain". Because after that, those moments are again taken as the actions of an enemies-to-lovers trope.

But where he was manipulative before that?

Good luck trying to figure out the impossibly ambiguous scenes where Leigh tried to paint him as one in S&B and failed.

People accuse the Darkling of being power-hungry

I agree, he sought power. But as far as we know he never wanted power exclusively for himself. In RoW it was revealed that even the Fold was the result of him trying to stop the wars:

Wars ended and began again—and again and again. Grisha were not accepted; they were resented in Ravka and hunted abroad. Men fought them with swords, then guns, then worse. There was no end to it, and so he had sought an end. Power that could not be questioned. Might that could not be reckoned with. The result had been the Fold.

The amplifiers? To control the Fold and stop the wars.

The nichevo'ya? Used them to lower the losses of his army.

The throne? Unlike his predecessor, he seemed to be involved in paperwork, listening to his advisors, feeding his army and trying to deal with all the deserters from that army.

"You try to defend him and his actions!!"

Actually we're trying to protect him from your stupidity and inability to read between the lines and past the narrative. And the Darkling has become totally evil in the eyes of this fandom because:

A) the narrative really did him dirty. Always talking about his atrocities and villainous actions.

B) the fandom is really clueless and stupid about the ways of leadership and ruling and I will die on this hill. You have NO idea how treason must be handled, or political intrigues are working and it shows from the very first second you open your mouth. "The Darkling scarred Genya!" Welcome to the world of "treason is met with consequences". "The Darkling lied to Alina!" Welcome to the world of politics.

Also, it's the double standards that kill us. You forgive Kaz for killing people for money but spit on the Darkling for doing it for a selfless purpose. You love Nikolai for trying to usurp the throne, but hate the Darkling for doing the same when he did it to bring a change to Ravka.

The Darkling was an anti-villain. Anti-villains are characters with a noble, sympathetic goal but the means to achieve it is through violence. And these characters are meant to stir sympathy towards the reader and are, almost always, tragic characters.

Now whether someone forgives his actions or excuse his character is always up to the reader.

But let's not pretend like the heroes did better. Or the fact that you probably wanted him to act like a forgiving, kind-hearted fairy godmother after one thousand years full of shit to the point that he broke, said enough and stood up against the violence and atrocities his people were suffering from. He decided to fight fire with fire and I find that understandable, just like the majority of his supporters in this fandom.

#i know and recognize his crimes and still stand by him #because he did something even if that something was too distasteful for you #the darkling #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #grishaverse trilogy #shadow and bone #grishaverse

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yesimwriting · 3 years ago

Text

Crossing lines

General Kirigan/the darkling x reader

Summary: This was requested by my friend @vvsdiamond28 who also writes and has a really good kirigan x reader story up right now! The request was basically for a fic in which the reader is out wandering at night and runs into kirigan while he’s in the banya and then they get to talking and some other stuff before he admits to only trusting the reader and giving her his real name. This gets kinda steamy bc of the request and bc the story called for it lol but it’s not full smut bc i decided that it would be better to do that as a part 2 so that i could add some jealousy tension haha

a/n i think im back?? Ive been working on requests a lot and ive really enjoyed writing regularly again. A small side note, after rewatching revenge of the sith im kinda in the mood to try writing an anakin fic 😭 pls he was my OG fictional crush,, so either send help or a request for him or something, Anyways,, back to this fic--ahh i had fun writing it but i still feel awkward writing steamier stuff so be nice!!

Those that wander in the night, lost in uneasy thought--there’s probably a lot that can be said about them. But I can’t think of anything to be said about me. Nothing good comes from walking around a place full of powerful and tense people in the middle of the night. It wouldn’t take much effort to interpret my actions as suspicious, and yet I continue forward. I’m an idiot--just because I can’t sleep doesn’t mean I have to wander around campgrounds. My presence is barely tolerated here, I shouldn’t try backstroking in waters I can barely tread.

But still, I walk, eyes more fixated on the open night sky than anything else. The moon is as full as an overflowing glass, the stars twinkling as if desperate to compete with a light it will never be able to duplicate. I sigh, pressing my lips together. Maybe the stars and I have more in common than I thought. Normally, that would be a good thing.

Letting out a weary breath, I continue forward, away from the relative safety of the main tents. I’m still on the grounds, I’m approaching the border where the tents of higher ranking officials are. That should make me more nervous, but if anything it almost eases me slightly.

General Kirigan is not the type to be friendly, and yet our interactions have always been laced with a touch of intimacy I can’t quite explain. We’ve been alone together more and more frequently, and I think that’s how I like him best. It’s strange, but when we’re alone some of his sharpness dulls, leaving space for something I might consider humor or actual personality on anyone else. He probably speaks to many girls like that when they’re alone together--a fact I have to fight to remind myself of--but it’s the closest thing to friendship I have here. Maybe it’s foolish to hold onto that, but I can’t bring myself to release my grip on those sentiments. At least not yet, when the kind moments are still rare and fleeting and no line has been crossed.

The danger, however, comes from the prospect of not recognizing lines before they’re crossed. Even now, as I walk aimlessly in the night, pacing in hopes of exhausting my thoughts, I’m crossing lines in a much more literal way and even these are ill defined. I must be in new territory now, and even that I can only vaguely recognize because of the strangely humid scent that surrounds this area of the grounds.

I’m near the banya. I didn’t intend to wander here, but the thought of splashing water on my face is too tempting to pass up on. I move closer, finding a sense of peace in having some direction, even in a small way.

When the promise of water is only steps away, I begin to regret everything. There’s a figure in the bath. I freeze, ready to attempt to shrink away in hopes of disappearing before I’m caught. This could easily turn extremely awkward even though I technically haven’t done anything. Most people don’t bathe at this hour. Who bathes this late at night?

I keep my eyes on the individual, trying to make out who they are and how aware they are of their surroundings in the dim light. Pale skin, dark hair--unbelievably attractive torso. My eyes linger there longer than they should. I force my gaze upwards, towards their face as if that can erase my ogling. Embarrassment leaves my face burning--I’m not the ‘ogling’ type, and this person doesn’t even know I’m here. I keep my eyes on them as I step back, taking in unaware features as best I can in the dark.

I know them--I--Saints, it’s Kirigan.

Fantastic. Of course he has to be even more impossibly attractive while shirtless and wet. I turn my head upwards sharply, more desperate to not be caught than ever. I would never, ever recover from being caught. Whether he’d tease me or be angry with me, I don’t know. I also don’t know which option I’d prefer.

I step back again, my gait wider due to my urgency. Snap. The sound of both a twig and my chance of a stealthy escape being shattered. I cringe, craning my neck to the left in a desperate attempt to make it clear that I wasn’t watching him. I take another desperate step, ready to duck behind a nearby tree. Maybe he hasn’t seen me--maybe he’s distracted and assumed that some kind of rabbit or something passed by. He may not actively dislike me, but I’m not sure any semblance of favor he may have for me extends to this situation.

“Y/n.” His tone reveals nothing but his level of certainty. Ignoring him will only make me seem guilty.

I pause, keeping my gaze off of him. “Yes.” It wasn’t really a question, and yet I still answer it like one. “I was--I couldn’t sleep so I thought I’d get some air, and I was walking kind of aimlessly and I ended up here and I didn’t think anyone would be here.” Why do I feel like I’m making this situation worse? “I’m sorry--I’m gonna--I’m going to go now.” This is the kind of embarrassing moment that will come back to me when I’m trying to fall asleep at night. I know it.

“You know the polite thing to do after intruding is to make eye contact.”

I don’t think my face has ever felt this warm before. At least he doesn’t sound angry, but his voice doesn’t reveal that much. I raise my gaze carefully, turning my head slowly. “I didn’t mean,” I exhale slowly, “It wasn’t my intention to intrude.”

He straightens slightly at my words, exposing more of his chest. I stay still, eyes trained on his to avoid an accidental lapse. “You could make it up to me by offering conversation.” Kirigan’s tone is deliberate, his words measured and calm. I don’t speak, feeling like I’m being presented a test I don’t understand, but most of our conversations leave me feeling like that. “Only if you’re comfortable.”

And just like that, I’m backed into a corner. A challenge. To deny him now would be to expose the effect he has on me. My chin raises a fraction of an inch as I take in that assured half-smirk. “Why wouldn’t I be comfortable?”

Kirigan arches a dark brow, assessing my response. “Then sit,�� his voice has not changed, “You want air and I want company.”

I don’t think anyone that looks as good as he does shirtless has ever had trouble finding company, especially with the smooth way he speaks. Despite this, I step forward to accept his challenge without calling him out on his coyness. Each step is the crossing of another invisible line until I’m near the water’s edge. I make sure to keep my nightgown at a respectable length as I sit down.

I make a point of extending my legs towards the water while leaning back so that I can’t be easily accused of being a coward. “I feel the need to warn you that I might not make particularly interesting company.”

He angles his head to the side slightly, drawing attention to his jawline and neck. I force my stare to focus on the water. “I’ve never found you uninteresting.”

There’s something resigned in the way he says this. On instinct, I look up, taking in the slight softening of his features. The release of his usual sternness only adds to his beauty, a fact that I’m already resenting.

“You may be the only one.” It’s not meant to be a deprecating comment, but I’m not sure my partial laugh softens my bitterness. I hope it does--I’d rather his interest than the interest of my entire unit.

Kirigan shifts forward, the water moving with him. “Do you think that any coldness you’re experiencing has to do with you?”

The question has me drawing my eyebrows together. What else could it be? I shrug, “I’ve considered it.”

He nods once, eyes hardening slightly. “Do you always have trouble sleeping?”

The personalness of the question shouldn’t surprise me as much as it does. Kirigan seems to only understand boundaries when he’s the one setting them. “Not really.” A partial lie--this time I’m glad I can’t quite bring myself to look at him. “It’s not uncommon for me, but it’s not something I deal with every night.”

I risk shifting my eyeline when I hear the sound of water moving. Kirigan’s now resting an arm on the rim of the pool, wet skin dangerously close to my ankle and lower calf. “It’s not always easy,” his voice is low now, “Being alone with your thoughts.”

That’s not the kind of reply I’d expect from him. I blink twice before turning to study his expression. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him seem so tired--so weary and human and in need of something. The line between his eyebrows and the far off quality of his eyes leave me with the strong desire to give whatever it is he needs to him. The urge to reach out, to touch him in hopes of breaking him free from his odd trance leaves my stomach knotted. That line is too clear to cross so recklessly.

I need to chase away the serious atmosphere he’s created. “Is that why you bathe so late at night?” I let myself smile, “To avoid thoughts?”

“I like the peace of it.” Something akin to amusement touches his words. “And for the record, little dove,” the nickname is pointed and earns him an eyeroll, “The warm water doesn’t exactly chase away thoughts so much as encourages others.” He pauses. “You understand, considering you can barely look at me.”

This is the most embarrassing thing to have ever happened. The suggestive jilt to his words has to be intentional. Damn him. I turn my head, forcing myself to meet his gaze. “I can look at you just fine.”

“And if I were a Heartrender and could hear your heartbeat your pulse would be normal?” The question is teasing, a small smile pulling at his lips.

The warmth in my face increases, spreading down my neck. Kirigan’s expression remains smug. “You’re not as funny as you think you are.”

“No?” He leans forward, angling his head so close to me I can faintly feel the warmth of his breath on my lower calf. “I find myself amusing.”

At least being around him like this is getting easier. I open my mouth, ready to provide some sarcastic comment I haven’t thought out yet. My mouth clamps shut on instinct when I feel his touch on my ankle. The faint contact quickly grows, his fingers brushing up my ankle and calf, leaving drops of cool water across my skin.

“What are you doing?” That’s a--a fair question, right? I’m not sure, rational thought slipping from me more and more with each passing second.

“Nothing, really,” his reply is quick. “Nervous?”

There is no way he doesn’t know what he’s doing. I roll my eyes, fighting against my instinctual fluster. “No,” a full lie, “You’re just getting me wet.”

“Barely.” When he’s not busy being brooding he’s not much better than an irritating child. He retracts his hand slowly, fingers grazing my skin slowly as he submerges his hand beneath the water. The loss of contact should feel like a victory. It doesn’t. “Y/n,” he shifts closer, back straightening.

There’s an odd seriousness to his demeanor that almost leaves me reeling. “Yes?”

He beckons me forward. I hesitate, but comply, letting myself shift closer to the water’s edge. Kirgan’s lips part, but no words leave him before he moves his arm, purposefully splashing water over my thighs and bottom of my nightgown. I let out an instinctively annoyed sound. “That is getting you wet.”

“Kirigan!” My tone is as menacing as I can make it, but he continues to grin. There’s such a lightness to the look I almost forget to be annoyed. Almost. “I should tell the entire Second Army how much of a child you are.”

My threat does nothing, his smile softening without fading. “They fear me too much for your stories to make a difference.” He says this flatly. “All of them except you.”

I don’t know if I’m supposed to make something of that comment. A brief moment passes in which I think his eyes come close to softening. Maybe that’s a side effect of seeing the world as you want. Wait...what do I want? Him? No, no, I can’t.

Okay, he’s objectively attractive and sometimes I think I may see more depth in him than he wants to be capable of. But that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to want anything with him. Even if he was trustworthy enough for me to be with him in any capacity...even casually, it could never happen. Nothing good could come from having relations with the highest ranked general and I doubt he’d ever want me like that. He likes to fluster people and I’m an easy target. I just accept it because being some level of entertainment to him is better than being nothing to everyone.

“I don’t think there’s much point in fear.” It feels like a fair answer. The fairest answer I can manage, anyways.

He sighs, the sound heavy. His hand stretches forward cautiously. I watch him and make no attempt to stop him from touching my lower calf. His fingers trace absentmindedly across the skin. “Of course you’d think that.”

Again, I don’t know what to make of his words. Or his actions. He couldn’t find anything wrong with me just slightly adjusting my position. It’d be a polite way to remind us both of the natural order of things. But then again, someone like him is allowed to be mad about anything. And I’m not sure I want to remind us of our place.

Actually, I’m completely sure that I want the opposite of that. But admitting that to myself is enough of a risk. I’ve already crossed thousands of tiny lines and what I want will require us to cross a thousand more.

“I’m a little surprised you’re not reminding me how foolish a notion like that can be.”

He lets out a tiny breath as he shifts even closer to me. “Maybe I’m enjoying your foolishness.”

“I’m not sure if I should take that as a compliment or the opposite.”

The slightest hint of a smile is visible to me beneath the moon’s glow. There’s something about darkness that adds beauty to things. I wait for him to reply, but instead of speaking his hand moves further up my leg. I struggle to hide my reaction to his long fingers trailing up my skin.

He’s touched me before, sure. Tiny moments in which he’d push a strand of hair out of my face or wipe at a bit of dirt on my cheekbone. More recently, he had gripped my hip firmly to guide me through a crowd of soldiers. He had been in a hurry, stealing me from a conversation with the only member of my unit that’s been somewhat friendly to me. It wasn’t serious--he had just been rushing me because he only had a minute between meetings and apparently he had too long of a day to not take a moment to speak with me.

“Are you alright, Dovey?” Normally, the nickname and all of its variations earns him an eyeroll. But everything is a lot less humorous with his hand half up my lower leg, leaving a trail of cool water wherever he touches.

His fingers press more firmly into my skin. “Yes, I’m fine--it’s just late.”

“Hm…” Kirigan breathes before tilting his head slightly. “You’re warm.” I stay silent as his hand shifts slightly. “Perhaps too warm.”

If I’m hot that has absolutely nothing to do with fever. “I’m fine, General, I promise.”

“Come closer,” he says, “It’ll take me no time to check.”

...A little too convenient. My nightgown is still embarrassingly damp from the last time I eased tonight. “Please tell me you don’t find me that naive.”

“Naive? No.” He lifts his hand slightly. “Warm? Yes.” I still don’t trust him. “I’m not going to do anything. I promise.”

His eyes are dark and the limited lighting of the moon doesn’t offer me much in my analysis, but what I can see makes him seem genuine. “Why do I feel like that’s not the first time you’ve had to say that?” Despite my comment, I move towards him.

The back of Kirigan’s palm is pressed to my forehead for less than a second. He brushes his hand down the side of my temple, rotating his wrist so that his fingertips can touch my cheek. His hand then continues to move down my jawline and then my neck...and then finally trails down my collarbone. I bite my tongue to avoid exhaling audibly at the contact.

“Warm,” he concludes with a tsk, and yet he doesn’t withdraw his hand. “Though that could just have to do with the climate.” His thumb slips beneath the sleeve of my nightgown. “Perhaps you could benefit from joining me.”

I bite my tongue to avoid letting out a surprised, embarrassingly enthusiastic squeak. I don’t know what’s gotten into him...maybe it’s the night air and the prospect of being fully alone. I should be strong enough to break whatever spell he’s starting to place on me. But I’m not. I’m really, really not.

He pulls on the sleeve of my nightgown slightly. “I’m…”

“Unless you’re nervous?” Another damn challenge. To shy away from this would be to expose myself. He tugs on the sleeve a little more assuredly, exposing my shoulder to the humid night. “Do I make you nervous?”

His voice comes out a shallow rasp. I feel it straight in my core. “...Not more than you should.”

“More than I should?”

Ugh--too honest. I let myself get distracted. It shouldn’t be too difficult to explain what I meant. He knows he’s feared. He wants to be feared. “I’m sure we’re both aware that there are a fair amount of cautionary tales revolving around you.”

His hand falls next to my lap. Oh? I didn’t expect to miss the contact between us so much. His expression seems to have fallen slightly as well. Was it my response to his question? It felt fair and straightforward without being too blunt. “And you believe every cautionary tale you hear?”

There’s something stiff about the way he asks the question. His moodiness is making me miss his touchiness even more. At least then I didn’t have to feel like I made a mistake. Did I say something wrong? “Should I?”

“It depends on whether or not you plan on being brave.”

“I told you...I don’t see much point in fear.”

“And yet you’re still there.” A bit of humor returns to his voice. “Why is that?”

Rolling my eyes, I shift forward, letting my legs dip into the water. This is as far as I should let this go. I’ve already lost too much more control. “Better?” He’s strangely tense again, a hint of something bitter playing at the smug look he tries for. “You alright?”

“Of course you’d ask me that.” He says this with a tired sigh. “You can never make things easy.”

“I don’t understand.”

He shifts backwards slightly. I can feel the distance between us like I’d feel a pebble in my shoe. “Do you believe all the stories about me?”

Is he still bothered by that? “I didn’t mean it as literally as you’re taking it. All I meant is that people are intimidated by you, but that’s not a bad thing. It’s the way things have to be, you’re the only Shadow Summoner in existence and the army needs you to be intimidating so that they can act on your guidance.”

“The way things have to be,” he echoes, his voice strangely weighted. “There’s a specific kind of loneliness that comes with being feared by everyone.”

Oh--I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him feel defeated like that. I reach for his hand without thinking, pulling his fingers towards my lap. “I don’t--I’m not scared of you.” It’s a weak attempt to comfort him, but it’s the only one I can think of. “That probably doesn’t mean anything, but I--”

His hand turns in my lap, squeezing the exposed part of my thigh. “It means something.” Kirigan’s voice has hardened in a different way. “You’re the only person I’m certain of.”

Everything in me seems to tighten at that. At the implication of something so personal from someone so closed off. “Kirigan, you don’t have to be as alone as you feel. You talk to me all the time and you do so in a way that makes it easy to forget the cautionary tales.” His hand moves further up my thigh. I fight as I try to remember our usual dynamic. “You’re the only one that talks to me like that.”

“Have you ever considered that maybe the others refuse to take to you because of the favor I’ve shown you? The instinct to stay away from me is strong enough to extend to those around me.” Kirigan’s hand moves higher up my thigh. “To be near me is to involve solitude.”

“I don’t care.” The answer leaves me too quickly. “Being near you is worth it.”

He leans closer before resting his chin on my knee with no hesitation. “Careful, you don’t understand the line you tread.” Kirigan places his hand more firmly between my thighs. “Or perhaps you do...perhaps you know what you want to cross.”

This time I can’t help the airy sigh that leaves me. Kirigan pushes against my thigh slightly, separating my legs. I feel his breath on my inner thigh before I know what’s going on. I can’t move, I can’t think, I can’t even breathe. That inability to do anything but feel my heart pound against my chest only worsens as I feel his lips press into the inside of my thigh. His lips trail up my skin before his teeth gently sink into the top of my thigh.

“Is the line you want to cross?” He breathes the question so softly I feel like I’m being coddled. Everything in me feels too hot to think of any kind of coherent response. Kirigan uses his free hand to pull the fabric of my nightgown as high up my thighs as he can from his position below me. “Or maybe this is the line you want to cross?” Kirigan pulls me forward so suddenly I let out a tiny gasp. I’m not fully on the edge of the banya. “Or perhaps this one?” He kisses the skin of my inner thigh gently. Each time I exhale too loudly, his teeth graze my skin. He gets harsher with each passing second. “Lay down.”

My body listens to him on instinct. How is this happening? How am I this powerless to fight against something that’s so clearly wrong? The sound of water shifting causes my entire body to tense. He’s pulled himself out of the water. Kirigan moves above me instantly, water dripping from his toned chest and dark hair and onto my still damp nightgown.

Before I can speak, he’s on me completely, his lips pressing against my jaw. He kisses down my neck, his teeth grazing against my skin sporadically. He pulls away from me by tracing his tongue across my collar bone. I let out something dangerously close to a moan. “Such pretty, little sounds.”

“Kirigan--”

“The only name I want you to hear from your lips is the only name that I’ve not given myself. The only name that holds meaning to me.”

His lips graze where my skin meets the hem of my now soaked through nightgown. I’m not sure the poor lighting is offering me enough coverage now. There’s no way the thin fabric leaves much to the imagination while being this wet. He kisses up my chest and neck until his lips reach the shell of my ear.

“Aleksander.” The name is grace in the form of a breath so soft it’s more like I’m feeling the name than actually hearing it.

He presses his lips against the spot on my neck directly beneath my ear. I exhale into the contact. “Aleksander.” As I test his true name on my tongue, his teeth dig into my skin much more harshly than before.

I let out a partial squeak at the sudden shift in pace as his hands grip my waist. “Say it again. Say my name again.”

He traces his tongue gingerly over the skin he just aggravated with his teeth before I can speak. The soothing sensation is so much I can barely find my voice. “Aleksander.”

His hand bunches the bottom of my nightgown, raising the fabric to my hips. “...Say it just like that.” Kirgan’s rough hand slips between the bone of my hip and the fabric of my hip. “Like I’m the only one that knows you like this.”

“Aleksander.” I breathe as he traces invisible patterns into my skin with his lips. “Aleksander.” Each use of his name earns me extra attention--a stronger hold on my hip, a more adamant nip at the base of my neck. I feel my need for him so heavily I swear it’s leaked into my bones. “Aleksander.”

When he pulls away, I fight the urge to whine. The night is still humid, but with the absence of his touch I feel like I’m shivering. He regards me silently for a long moment before shifting his weight again. I feel my heart stall in my chest as his hand softly brushes a strand of hair out of my face. He lets his hand linger there, at the apple of my cheek. The entire world seems to stall as he leans down, his hand cupping the side of my face as his mouth inches closer to mine.

“I can feel the fluttering of your heart.”

Any poor defense dies in my throat as his lips meet mine. He gives me no time to think about what’s happening as he presses into me even harder. Kirigan holds my face as his teeth graze against my bottom lip. My mouth opens slightly in surprise, giving him the opportunity he needs to slip his tongue into my mouth. His tongue slowly brushes against mine, coaxing me into total, delirious, compliance. When he starts to pull away, I react, my hands flying forward to grab his hair. He lets me get away with tugging him towards me, prolonging the kiss as he bites my bottom lip.

One of his hands leaves my face and travels up the hands holding onto his hair. He pulls me off of him easily, pinning both of my wrists above my head with one hand. “Easy,” Kirigan warns, “You’ve been such a good girl, let’s not ruin it before we’ve started.”

A tiny sigh leaves me. I can feel the pride he takes in that as his hand trails further down my body. His fingers ghost along the hem of my underwear teasingly.

“Is someone there?” I’ve never damned the voice of a stranger more.

Panic and dread roll in my stomach. I’m going to get caught like this, with my nightgown bunched at my hips beneath the General Kirigan. An unclothed, wet, General Kirigan. “I’m bathing.”

Okay...good...Aleksander spoke. Anyone with common sense would run at the thought of invading on Kirgan’s privacy. It’s a good thing that the soldier had the sense to linger behind a thicket of bushes. “Pardon General, but there’s been a crucial development. A new strategy should be thought of as soon as possible.”

No. No. The thought of losing contact so entirely, of having a moment that should have never happened be ripped from me before it’s even really happened is overwhelming. I feel my lips pull into a pout. Kirigan’s hand adjusts on me, his thumb pressing teasingly over where I’m neediest. I bite my tongue to avoid making an inappropriate noise.

“Five minutes--I’ll be in the strategy tent in five minutes.”

“I’ll tell the others, General.”

Great. I hear the stranger disappear, his feet crushing twigs and grass as he leaves us. Aleksander’s attention returns to me quickly. Disappointment swells in my chest as I take in the solemn look that crosses his features. His hand moves to my chin quickly before pulling me into another deep kiss. It’s too short lived.

“I have to go.”

Frowning, I lift my hand to trace my fingers up his arm. It’s softer than I should allow myself to be, but it doesn’t really matter anymore. Not when this is probably never going to happen again. “Do you?” I mumble to myself, half joking.

He sighs once, his thumb brushing against my cheek. “No pouting.”

Now that whatever little bubble we were in has popped, I’m capable of normal feelings. Including shame. “I am n--”

“Easy, little dove, I’ll remember all of this when I find you again.”

This...this is going to happen again? “You’re going to find me?”

“I haven’t yet heard your voice crack on my name as I undo you.” He punctuates the promise with a kiss to my jaw. “Again.” Another kiss. “And again.” Another brush of his lips as he finally pulls away. “And again.”

My breath catches itself in my throat as he moves off of me entirely. Damn whatever change in the war that’s pulled him away from me so suddenly. I sit up as he stands. I’m not sure where to look now that he’s not in close enough proximity to cloud my thoughts. I should leave as he dresses, but I can’t quite bring myself to. It doesn’t feel safe, not when the man that interrupted us could reappear at any moment. Not when I want to hold onto his presence like this as long as possible.

He squeezes my shoulder warmly as he passes before bending down to press one more kiss next to where his hand is.

“Soon,” he promises again.

General taglist: @theincredibledeadlyviper, @grishaverse7 @benbarnes-supremacy @tranquilitymoon @kaitlyn2907 @lunamyangel @christinawxxx @deceivedeer @real-mbappe @tonks33

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 2 years ago

Note

I just wanted to jump on here and say, I love your blog! I’ve been looking for someone who has similar views as me regarding SaB and darklina specifically and who is actively answering anon questions and HERE YOU ARE! Yay! All your answers have been so interesting and great!

By the way, have you listened to my tears ricochet by Taylor Swift? It is basically Darklina’s anthem. It’s quite tragic and she was writing it based on her broken relationship with her old record label but that’s the beauty of top notch writing, it can be related to other things easily. Give it a shot!

💕💕

Seeing this in my ask box really made my day so thank you for that. ❤️ I love to get asks because it gives you that opportunity to really examine the show and characters and maybe think of things you might otherwise have overlooked. I also love hearing others thoughts and theories and its really fun to have discussions about characters, ships and shows that you love. So asks, anon or otherwise, are always welcome.

So slight confession I may have watch 1 or 2 (or more like 10) darklina edits to my tears ricochet, I love that song and you are absolutely right it is a darklina anthem. I also agree with what you said about top notch writing being easy to relate to other things. One of my favourite things about all types of media, shows, films, songs and books is that everyone perceives and interprets it differently and everyone can take something new and personal away from it or relate to it in different ways.

But getting back to the song here are some parts that remind me the most about darklina.

'If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes too.' This line reminds of darklina's bond and how their fates really did seem to be tied together. Also how by working against each other they both kind of destroyed by the other. In the books seeking to destroy the darkling resulted in Alina losing a part of herself, in the show it looks like it may have lead to her corruption.

'Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe, All the hell you gave me?' This reminds me of several things, one is how alina feels about Aleks putting the collar on her and stealing her powers. But it also can be related to Aleks and Baghra's relationship, to Alek's and Anastas' relationship and basically to anyone who betrayed, hunted or tried to kill Aleks because lets be real he was put through alot of trauma by a lot of people.

'Cause I loved you, I swear I loved you, 'Til my dying day' I mean this one is pretty self explanatory but I think its can be representative of how despite everything and being on the opposite sides to each other darklina did love each other, especially Aleks towards Alina right until the day he died.

'And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? Cursing my name, wishing I stayed.' Ok this is totally how Alina, and at times Aleks, act like they no longer care for the other, that they are dead to each other, yet they still are drawn to each other. Despite cursing each others names they both still wish things could have been different. And Aleks definitely wishes Alina had stayed.

'You know I didn't want to have to haunt you, But what a ghostly scene.' Again this one reminds me of their tether bond and how in a way they are haunting each other, they keep coming to each other through this bond but again they both dreamt of something different, both once dreamt of a time where they could both work together to better ravka. They didn't want to be haunting each other they wanted to be at each other's side.

'Cause when I'd fight, you used to tell me I was brave.' Alina talks about how Aleks was the first person to make her feel like she could be something more and Aleks always admired Alina's fight, loves to watch her grow in power, this line reminds me of that, of how Aleks would rise Alina up and help her feel powerful, help her feel brave.

'And I can go anywhere I want, Anywhere I want, just not home.' Ok this one makes me sad because I do feel like darklina became each others safe place, each others peace and they found a home at the LP. But now they are broken apart and I think both are a bit lost, neither one can find their way back home. Back to that feeling of peace they had.

'And you can aim for my heart, go for blood, But you would still miss me in your bones.' This is the perfect line to describe darklina's dynamic in season 2. How Alina, and again at times Aleks, would try to hit each other where it would hurt. Alina mocking Aleks loneliness, bringing up his past, Aleks reminding Alina that she has no future with Mal who will grow old and die as Alina remains ageless. Yet despite that anger and spite they still miss the other deep in their bones.

'And I still talk to you (when I'm screaming at the sky), And when you can't sleep at night (you hear my stolen lullabies).' Another line that makes me think of the tether bond and how they are still drawn to each other, still apart of each other.

'And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves, You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same.' Ok last one, the battleships line makes me think about how neither one can really win in this fight against each other, either way they both will sink. The part about you had to kill me but it killed you just the same, obviously makes me think of how Alina believed she had to kill him to save Ravka. In the books this really does have an effect on Alina and I do think it killed her to do it. In the show while she currently seems less effected by it I do think in season 3 we will see that it was actually hard on her.

#darklina #s&b season 2 spoilers #answered

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light-yaers · 3 years ago

Text

Fools in the Darkness: Chapter Nine

Darkling x Reader

Warnings: Death, violence, drugs (Parem), NSFW and sexual content. This content is explicit and 18+ at some points.

A/N: OHOHOHHOHOHOHHO. That’s all I can say about this chapter. Hope you enjoy it. All of you need to go to horny jail.

Buy me a Ko-Fi

Fic Masterpost

Word Count - 3.7k

Chapter Nine

“I have a feeling I know how this story ends,” Jesper said sadly. You found yourself scoffing at him.

“No, you don’t,” You said lightly. “I still don’t know how it ends,”

“What do you mean?” Kaz spoke up, interested suddenly. You let out a sigh, sending a glance over to Inej who was watching you so closely; so worriedly.

“He’s still looking for me, still trying to find me. He doesn’t know I crossed the Fold—,”

“You crossed the Fold?” Kaz interrupted, standing abruptly. “Why? How?”

“You—you should be dead,” Inej said timidly. She was right, they were both right to react in such a way. It was almost impossible really, to cross the Fold on your own. No skiff, no secure route, no way of knowing what would happen when the dark swallowed you whole.

You thought then about telling them how—telling them how you did it and came out of the dark with nothing more than a few scratches on your body; but a lot of scratches in your mind. But you chose not to; that was the end of the story.

If it ended, then maybe... they’d throw you out. Cast you aside. Be done with their interest in your sad little life. You were scared that they’d leave you, even though you hardly knew these criminals. You were scared that you’d be alone again, when the weight of realisation that you’d been alone all along at the Little Palace had hit you so hard before.

All you wanted was security, stability, a home, a family.

“I know,” You finally replied, forcing yourself to smile. “You’re getting too far ahead, though,” Kaz slowly descended into his seat once more, fingers curled tightly around his crow-headed cane. You wondered then, what it felt like to constantly have something on your person.

Inej with her knives. Kaz with his cane. Jesper with his pistols.

You had no such thing, unless you counted the raggedy old Kefta on your shoulders, but you didn’t particularly want to. You’d hated it from the beginning; you’d only worn it because of him.

You could still remember the first time you’d ever donned it.

The Little Palace, Six Months Ago

“Hey! Hey!” Genya’s yells cut through the forest easily, as if the trees allowed her voice to penetrate through them to hit your ears. You stopped training as she approached, breathing heavily, her face blotched with red.

“Genya,” You said, amused, jogging over to where she was hunched over, catching her breath. “Did you run here?”

“No... horses... left...” She heaved out, waving a hand in front of her face in place of a fan. “Saints—that woke me up,” You placed a supportive hand on her shoulder, on the brink of laughing at her flushed face.

“What’re you doing?” You questioned, as she started to calm down. She sucked a breath deep into her lungs, regarding your amused expression.

“It’s the General,” She said. Your face immediately dropped as your heart catapulted into your throat. “He’s back,”

You waved Genya off as she rode your horse back to the stables. There was more than enough space for both of you on the steed, but you needed time to calm your trembling limbs. The walk back would be able to offer you that.

It’d been four months since Aleksander had left the Little Palace. Time had gone fast, but also agonisingly slowly at the same time; which still confused you as to how that was even possible. His face had been forever etched in your mind since that night—his timid knocks, his abrupt and unapologetic kiss, the way his fingers roamed your bare skin like an extension of your own body.

Your heart had been aching ever since, but you’d tried to replace that void with training. You worked hard, mercilessly, tirelessly, so that Aleksander would be able to marvel at your improvement after his return.

He’d sent letters, but rarely. You had three in total, scrawled down in rushed handwriting by a man who you imagined to be busy beyond belief. But he’d still sent them; he’d still checked in with you, sent his words of affirmation, adoration—

Craving. Words of craving and longing and the obviousness that he was missing you.

You kept those letters in the locked drawer of the desk in your chambers, keeping the key secure in the cabinet at your bedside. Maybe it was supposed to be secretive, maybe it was supposed to be kept in the dark—or maybe you were overanalysing it all—but you didn’t want people prying. You didn’t want the extra pressure or scowls or attention that would no doubt come from having this kind of relationship with the General.

If it even was a relationship. You opted not to call it as such, not fully understanding what Aleksander even saw in you, wanted from you—liked about you.

As much as these four moths had been incredibly lonely, you couldn’t stop the uncomfortable wave of anxiety that beat through your entire body as you walked back over the fields to the palace. Beyond those cream walls and gold trim and décor, Aleksander would be back inside.

Waiting for you.

You’d improved; there was no doubt about that. There was a small thought then, when you got ever closer to the palace, that perhaps you should show off. You could already see the hub of carriages and Grisha in the distance, surrounding the General upon his return—

And Saints, maybe it was jealously, or excitement, or fear—

But there was something urging you to summon the air and glide to him. Show him what you’d learned, what you were capable of, what you’d taught yourself in his absence.

You took in a deep breath, bringing your hands together quickly. The air surrounded you almost instantly, circling your body and ruffling your hair and blouse as it descended to your feet. Within seconds, you were hovering atop the mound of air at the ground, and as you directed your hands forward, the air followed your commands.

You were propelled forward quickly, gliding effortlessly up the remaining fields until you were back on the palace grounds. You kept going, rounding the stables and slaloming between plant pots and other garden décor, until you approached the courtyard in a flash.

A few Grisha squealed at your arrival, parting the crowds around Aleksander’s carriage and making way for your storm. You lowered your hands then, jumping to the floor as the air at your feet dissipated into nothingness. You took one step forward, and all of a sudden his eyes were on yours—

His stare unwavering, his shoulders broad and brooding, his eyes as dark and deep as the time he’d left; but the smile on his face was one that you’d never seen before. Some mixture of longing and nostalgia and awe. He was impressed, as his eyes roamed down your body until they hit your feet, where your summoned pocket of air had been just moments before.

He trailed his gaze back up your body, landing upon all of the places that he’d touched before. You skin buzzed beneath your clothes, set alight by his stare that you hadn’t realised just how much you’d missed him, until he was stood before you once more.

Aleksander turned, fully, to you then, approaching you slowly, step by agonising step.

“General,” You spoke first, trying to bat away the huge grin on your face into something more subdued. “You’re back,” You added, with a lack of what to say, other than I missed you, Aleksander. Saints, you wouldn’t say that here, not around the other Grisha.

“I see you’ve... improved,” He said softly, trickling his rough voice over you warmly. Saints—you’d missed that fucking voice.

“I suppose that’s up to you, Sir,” You replied, ignoring the tension that floated between the two of you like a storm cloud, just waiting for thunder to crack and lightning to flash.

“Let’s discuss your improvements later. This evening, in my office,” He stated. You tried to keep your expression flat; professional.

“I’ll see you then, General,” He shot you a smile before moving away. The crowd of Grisha and officers dissipated as Aleksander made his way to the palace, and all too soon the black of his uniform was hidden behind the closed doors.

Genya came up beside you then, crossing her arms as an amused smile littered her face. “Someone’s happy to see you,” She said slyly. You shoved your elbow into her rib softly, giving her a light push.

“Shut it,” You said, but there was no denying it. You were happy, the happiest you’d been in months, seeing the stubble that dotted his chin and the pensive look he reserved solely for you. You didn’t care about the murmurs surrounding your abrupt entrance or the obvious secretive nature that you and Aleksander conversed in from the other Grisha—you only cared that he was back.

He was back with you, after what felt like years.

You couldn’t shake the smile from your face when you walked through the upper corridors of the Little Palace, headed back to your chambers that evening. You couldn’t shake the excited energy that coursed through your veins or the anxious buzz that you got from imagining being alone with Aleksander again, after so long.

“He’ll get bored, you know,” Her voice was the only reason the smile drained from your face then, as you stopped in the corridor and turned back.

Zoya stood in the middle of the hallway, silhouetted by the dwindling evening light. You’d recognise her defensive stance and tense shoulders anywhere. “He always does,”

You’d almost forgotten what it was like to be face-to-face with her, after so long avoiding her presence. But all too soon that uncomfortable feeling hit your gut whenever she was around; fear of the unknown.

“What are you talking about?” You replied, but you knew she was talking about Aleksander. She took a few confident steps forward, brooding and almost frightening in this isolated part of the palace. You kept your guard up strongly.

“Kirigan loves girls that he can mould to his own perception. You’re just another in a long line of Grisha that he’s taken an interest in,” Zoya said, her voice coarse and unforgiving. You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. You didn’t know what to say.

“Let me guess, he called you special. He called you powerful and strong. He’s littered your mind with ego-building drivel and promised you what you desire the most,”

You were stunned by her words, as your mind started fretting the last six months under this roof. But—this was also Zoya. Zoya, who hated your fucking guts. Zoya, who was endlessly jealous of any woman that stood by Kirigan’s side. Zoya, who evidently had qualms with the General himself that had been long forgotten by him.

You refused to acknowledge any words that fell from her lips as fact. She was untrustworthy and always would be in your eyes. She continued to approach you, and you started to lose your nerve. You balled your fists instinctively, and she stopped when she saw your shoulders drop defensively. The grin that curled onto her lips was akin to the Devil—devious and all-knowing.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, when he decides you’re of no worth. What happens when he finds the Sun Summoner, hm? You really think he’ll stay by your side?”

“You’re hurt over something that has long since passed, Zoya. Kirigan saw through your childish behaviour. You need to grow up,” You finally replied, but the words felt muddied leaving your mouth. You hated confrontation at the best of times, but this conversation had curdled your blood faster than you’d expected.

Zoya let out a disgusted chuckle. “See? You’re already too far gone,”

“And you’re a snake who can’t get over the fact that Kirigan may prefer the company of others. Others who don’t hoard past relationships over his head like a curse and constantly beg for affection that he doesn’t want to give,” You watched as her face dropped, and then all too soon she was storming towards you. She swiftly shoved you into the wall of the corridor, shoving her arm beneath your neck and pushing down just enough to keep you stuck. You refused to fight back.

“Your days are numbered. He will soon come to realise that you are nothing but a lost soul, just like the Volcra in the Fold that he wishes to destroy,”

She left as soon as she’d appeared, rounding the corridor and leaving you to place a soft hand against your neck, sucking in air as you caught back your breath. You shut the door of your chambers quietly, flexing your fingers in an attempt to make them stop trembling.

You washed and freshened yourself up, your mind racing. That’s when the wardrobe caught your eye; something within it was burning to get out.

You stomped to it, opening the doors swiftly and laying your eyes over the long forgotten Kefta that Aleksander had commissioned for you so long ago. You draped it over your arm, tracing your fingers over the intricate and beautiful patterns of white and grey, next to the backdrop of such a deep black—his colour—

The colour of the Darkling.

“Enter,” His voice said lowly, and you entered his chambers confidently. Aleksander stood with his back turned to you, placing down two tumblers and that oh so familiar bottle of Ravkan rum on the dark wood table.

When he turned, he stopped immediately. Time slowed, the air stilled, and Aleksander was but a marble statue in a world of concrete creatures.

You stood by the centre table, tall, chin out, Kefta donned for the first time. The fabric draped over you snuggly, the belt showing off the waist that you had underneath such bulky clothing. In this light, the embroidery glistened like Fjerdan snow; bright, light, powerful. After six months, the Kefta that Aleksander had so desperately and patiently waited for you to wear was now on your frame.

You were a Grisha. And perhaps, you were his.

The smile that curled onto his lips hit you—that’s what you’d been waiting for in response. The subtle curve of his smile, the gleam of his dark eyes as they traversed every crevice and curve of your body before him, the subtle flex of his fingers as if eagerly awaiting when he’d be able to touch you again.

The Aleksander you had so dearly missed, after months without his presence. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

“Just as I expected,” He said finally, as he began to walk towards you slowly. “Radiant,”

You blushed at his words, allowing yourself to don a small smile as he approached ever closer. “You picked the right colour,” You replied, prompting a small scoff to fall from his lips.

He reached you then, standing face-to-face comfortably. You peered up at him, noting the way his Adam’s apple bobbed with every gulp he made. Tension surrounded you both once more, but it was much stronger than you’d been expecting.

Aleksander reached out and grabbed the belt of your Kefta, tugging you forward abruptly. You refrained from squealing as you were pulled into his chest, laying your palms flat against him and feeling the unmistakeable pitter patter of his heart, thumping mercilessly beneath his skin.

“It’s such a shame that the first time I see you in your Kefta, I also want to rip it off of you,” He whispered lowly, cascading his voice over your face until you were mere putty in his hands. His hands snaked around your waist then, keeping you flush against his chest. You raised your hands to his neck, eyes flicking to his lips involuntarily as a warmth gushed through your gut.

“That doesn’t sound like a shame to me,” You whispered back, drawing circles over his skin with your fingers. He shivered at your touch, and a small growl sounded from the back of his throat. Abruptly, he hoisted you onto the table, treading quickly so he stood between your legs snuggly. You let out a gasp at his forwardness, but there was no denying it—

Both of you wanted this, wanted each other.

It’d been months in the making, and the absence of one another had only increased these feelings tenfold. You wanted Aleksander to rip the Kefta from your body and kiss you everywhere. You wanted to run your fingers over ever section of bare skin that the Darkling possessed; intentionally, lingering your touch wherever you could, so he’d always feel the warmth of your fingertips even when you weren’t there.

“Do you know how much I thought of you while I was away?” He questioned, and you swallowed down your incessant heartbeat.

“I imagine it was close to how much I thought of you,” You replied, inching your lips closer to his own.

“I poured over your letters,” He admitted. “I imagined your voice reading them to me. I imagined us in the forest, alone together, when my body refused to sleep,”

“Aleksander,” You said abruptly, when the feeling in your gut became far too intense. “Just kiss me,” You begged. He obliged.

His lips pressed into yours with a ferocity that you’d been waiting for since he’d left. It was more than the kiss you’d stolen before he left; more meaningful, less hasty, as if he was taking his time to navigate the intricacies of your body and mouth, now that he was able to.

You gripped onto him as if you’d never let go, feeling the curve of his spine, the tension in his jaw, the soft but trusting way his eyes were closed as his lips were flush against your own. Without parting, his hands pried off the belt of your Kefta, exposing your bare chest beneath. You’d opted against wearing your blouse, almost knowing that this would happen.

When his hands lay upon your warm, bare skin, Aleksander parted from you. His eyes skimmed your chest, landing upon your clavicle and your exposed breasts. There was a hunger in his eyes that you’d never seen before, but one that only made you want him more.

He smiled boyishly. “This was quite presumptuous of you,” He let out roughly, referring to your bare chest.

“I know you, Aleksander,” You replied, as you allowed the thick Kefta to fall from your shoulders until your torso was utterly exposed.

“Yes, you do,” He said, before plunging his lips onto yours once more. You noticed the difference now, as if he was craving so much more, and didn’t know how to grab as much of you as he could. His fingers swiped down to your trousers before long, toying with your waistband.

But this time, you pulled away quickly. You looked at him with a smug expression, flicking your eyes over his clothed body. “I don’t think that’s fair,” You said playfully, as your fingers moved to the buckles of his uniform.

You’d seen Aleksander bare just once, when you’d both jumped into the lake those months ago. You’d been thinking of that day ever since, imagining the time you’d get to be the reason for him undressing in front of you.

He mimicked your smile, but instead of helping, he simply raised his arms. Like the body of Christ on the cross, he smiled and waited for you to undress him. You let out a scoff, jumping off of the table to kiss him playfully, as your fingers pried apart all of the buckles on his jacket and dropped it to the floor.

Aleksander toyed with you when you got to his shirt, nipping at your earlobe and neck while you tried desperately to undo the buttons.

“You’re terrible at this,” He whispered in your ear.

“You’re terrible at standing still,” You replied, giving him another peck while you tried to avoid his playful teasing. You undid another button and moved onto the next.

“I don’t want to stand still,” He said. “I want to carry you to my room and lay you down,” His words made your entire body shiver. Arousal crept up through your gut to your chest, causing your heart to almost explode beneath your ribs.

“You can do that after I’ve touched every inch of you,” You said, amused, but Aleksander let out a guttural moan. He stopped playing suddenly, as he abruptly wrapped his arms around your waist and hoisted you from the floor. You wrapped your legs around his hips instinctively.

“I’ve run out of patience,” He muttered, as he carried you to the adjoining room of his chambers. You’d never been in Aleksander’s bedroom before, but it was just as you expected. A dark wood, four poster-bed in the centre of the large room, dotted with matching furniture.

He dropped you to the bed and wasted no time as he went for your waistband once more. You protested playfully, scrambling to keep undoing the buttons of his shirt.

“No fair!” You yelled, but it was obvious you weren’t really complaining. Aleksander tugged down your trousers, pulling you abruptly as he loomed over you. His arms were by each side of your head, your body encased in his shadow as he towered above you, boxing you in from all angles.

He stopped then, as his eyes ate you up. All bare skin and soft curves and subtle goosebumps—his. He looked at you like he’d imagined this moment often, like it littered his mind when he tried to focus and only left him frustrated by his own desires.

“I didn’t think it was possible for you to get more beautiful,” He whispered. You swiped your fingers over the last button, undoing it finally and tugging the shirt off of his shoulders. Your fingers skimmed over his chest softly, until you reached his heart. You placed your palm flat against his skin, keeping your eyes fixed on him.

“Your heart is racing,” You said, feeling his incessant beat. It only made your own speed up even faster, mimicking his own pulse.

“You know why,” He replied, and as he did, he dipped his head down, pressing his lips against yours strongly. You inhaled him fully, wrapping your legs around his hips and bringing him down on top of you.

He pulled away, coiling his arm around your head until his fingers were combing through your hair.

“It’s because of you,” He breathed out. “I’m only focused on you,”

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