#i feel like dean in dta
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bloodfreakcastiel · 2 years ago
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apparently i have a kink for misha behind the wheel of a car, like a true passenger princess
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bagsley · 2 years ago
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here’s the thing sometimes i’m like wow wish i could tolerate destiel even a little bit because then i could give dta a shot. but then i’m like if everyone says u don’t even need to have watched supernatural to read it… well… maybe i wouldn’t have such a good time
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gayangelcrimes · 2 years ago
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Having a dta moment (having a fever and fucking hating it)
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bloodydeanwinchester · 4 months ago
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Do you have any destiel fic recs? I haven't read many fics and I've been wanting to get into it but there's just SO many lol. I love long fics but any recs are appreciated! Sorry this ask is kind of out of nowhere. I was looking through my following list and you seemed like a good person to ask lol.
hiiii!!!! oh boy yesss i have SO many recs for you!!!!
first of all. i already have a few posts about destiel fic recs so i'll link those here: time travel fics, fics over 100k, canon fic recs, fix-it fics, fics over 100k 2, and canon fics recs 2.
but since you're new to reading destiel fic and like you said it can be overwhelming because there's just SO MUCH i will give you a list of some of my favorites that i think are really good ones for people first starting out with destiel fics:
a turn of the earth - this was the first destiel fic i ever read!! and honestly it was THEE perfect introduction into destiel fics
the benjamin franklin key-and-kite experiment - faith dean meets emmanuel cas this one is just a really fun play on canon and i am so fond of it
spirit of the west - i am not a huge au enjoyer but this fic is absolutely required reading for any destiel girlie it is THEE destiel au imo
let's take a drive - sobsicles is probably one of my all time favorite destiel fic writers and this fic is probably my favorite from them but also if you enjoy it there are tons more written by them for you to read!
crossing lines - if you are a deangirl this is THEE fic for you that's all im gonna say
the cheapest room in the house - god this fic has such a choke hold on me it's just sooooo fucking good!!! you have to read it!!!!!
also i'll share this post with you, the destiel classics post. when i was first starting to read destiel i read these fics first (after a turn of the earth), they are probably the most popular fics in the fandom and some are better than others but i do think they are all important ones to read eventually! (but i would suggest skipping twist and shout and waiting until you've read quite a bit more fic before you start Map of the World/DTA!)
anyway hope this helps and didn't just confuse you more! feel free to message me anytime if you want more specific recs!
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chitaquahq · 6 months ago
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Reverse DTA where Endverse Dean ends on in the main storyline would be so funny.
First of all, he doesn't have an army, it's not the end of the world anymore and most people he haven't seen in years are alive or don't even know him.
I think seeing Bobby alive would soften him, but knowing Sam is alive too? That the other Dean did as he promised and he saved the world without saying yes to Michael? That'd do it.
I think they'd figure out pretty quickly that their Dean is on the Endverse and try to find a way to bring him back, but then the Leviathans start to wreck havoc and they don't have time.
He would feel just as jealous as the other Dean felt when he started comparing their lives. Just that he'd probably start with the hunter camps and he'd feel like he's winning the competition 😂
Also??? Meeting Cas as Emmanuel might kill him on the spot due the whiplash and the irony of Cas being married, having amnesia and living the life of a saint. That'd be so messy, lol.
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autisticandroids · 2 years ago
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Director's commentary on "hunger" PLEASE. I cannot stop thinking about the yonic abyss.
[the goal here is to provide a director's commentary, a la the one i did for i fold in half so easily, though obviously less comprehensive. this commentary is for hunger.]
i don't have a TON to say about hunger. but. well. ok. first of all. yonic abyss castiel comes from this post by @allegedlyopposed. that's crucial before we start. okay. second thing you have to know is that i was DESPERATELY finishing this ON november fifth. in order to get something posted and i managed it at like 11pm. the third thing is that the original concept for this fic was um. much weirder. as you'll see.
also like, i had a ton of fun writing this fic because like... a lot of endverse cas fic is like. it's About The End. that's what it's about. it's really uninterested in how the endverse related to the rest of the canon except in terms of differences. but the thing about the endverse is like. the point of divergence from the timeline is free to be you and me. that's pretty fucking late! a lot of things that we see happen in canon have also happened to endverse dean and cas. endverse cas sat with dean on a bench and discussed doubts. endverse cas saw dean fall apart in on the head of a pin. endverse cas said "we're making it up as we go." so like, it was a lot of fun to write a fic that is essentially mostly about lazarus rising, framed through the endverse. like it's very explicit that this is like... also how our cas feels. he would just never say it, and may not even have the words to articulate it yet.
“Want some?” Cas says, offering the joint, and Dean looks over at his jailer.
“No, thanks. I, um, don’t partake.” Dean feels his cheeks heat.
Cas laughs, then. It’s a big belly laugh, complete with a coughing fit halfway through. He chucks Dean on the shoulder.
“It gives you panic attacks, I know. I just wanted to see if you’d agree out of embarrassment. You were such a priss about admitting it back in the day.”
i love you weedsocks boy. the thing about dean winchester is that he is a little chihuahua of a man and could never smoke weed he is TOO anxious. however, as an homage to the dean winchester beat sheet. i do believe that he pretends to other people that he smokes weed.
Dean doesn’t know what to say to that. He doesn’t say anything. He sits and he watches Cas smoke, instead.
“-can’t even fucking look at him” is what Dean’d heard this afternoon through the cabin wall. “So you want me to?” came the drawled reply. That’s when Cas had come into Dean’s cabin - Dean’s in the sense that it belonged to his future self, but also Dean’s in the sense that it was where he’d been kept for the past however many hours - and taken him by the arm.
it's crucial to me that endverse cas be mean. that's like. it's the last power that he has, over dean. they both know that cas will follow dean to the ends of the earth willingly, and they also know that dean can't do anything to cas, so it's like. stalemate. dean keeps cas around, and cas makes nasty remarks, and dean gives orders, and cas does what dean says in the end (no pun intended, hah). you know? and it's also about how endverse cas is you know maybe in some ways better off in his relationship with his dean than like, season fifteen cas. more secure, less afraid, possessed of more power and agency. even if when all is said and done it all ends up the same.
Now he’s in Cas’ beaded hippie dreamscape, minus the girls, and he’s not cuffed but he’s pretty sure that if he tried to leave he’d be down before he took four steps. 
look i'm not a dta girlie but that bit in dta where cas just obliterates dean in like the first or second chapter was compelling.
There aren’t really chairs in Cas’ cabin, just a couple big wooden chests all covered in candles, but there’s these fat, plush silky pillows, and the carpet’s real soft. It’s nice as long as Dean sits criss-cross applesauce and doesn’t think of what might be caked into it. It can’t be worse than some of the motel beds he’s slept in, right?
Cas is leaning back on a pile of cushions, one leg bent, the other loose and stretched across the floor. He blows a smoke ring, and Dean can see his throat working. Watches his Adam’s apple bob.
“You used to be a priss about everything. You know, when you had to shoot Jo Harvelle, I held your hair back as you bent over the toilet. It was long for a while. We were hiding out in one of Rufus’ old cabins. Couldn’t get electricity for the clippers.” Cas sighs. It’s a wistful sound. “It's a shame we've got solar panels now. You were so pretty. It fell around your face like…” he trails off, staring at the ceiling. A shiver goes through Dean. “At least we can flip the lights on at Chitaqua.”
cas voice who cares that jo is dead i got to touch your face. gayboy moment of the highest degree.
Dean glances around at Cas’ cabin. There’s no bulb in the single ceiling fixture. Just candles.
also it's crucial that i am positing a prelapsarian time where this dean and this cas WERE happy. they may or may not have been sleeping together (probably yes but it doesn't really matter) (it will become clear as the fic goes on that they have slept together at SOME point, but possibly not until things were falling apart, hard to tell) but they WERE happy. or, more likely, cas was happy. dean was miserable - he had to put down his friends like rabid animals - but cas and dean were holed up together all alone or nearly so, and dean was soft and vulnerable, enough so to both let his hair grow out and to let cas hold it back. like this was clearly an idyllic time for cas, specifically, because the world may have been ending but he had dean, in a meaningful, serious way.
Cas’ head flops to the side, and it would have felt unintentional except his eyes are so clear and bright and now they’re staring right into Dean’s.
“C’mere.” Cas cricks a lazy finger at him, and he might have said that in his chill stoner voice but God, it's a command. It's an order, and Dean can't disobey. Cas used to lead armies, and Dean can feel it in the smoky air they're sharing.
Dean scoots closer, but Cas pats the cushions beside him.
“Lay down. Stay awhile.” He laughs again, like it’s some sort of joke, but the sound is creaky. Breathy. More like a sigh than a laugh, less like a sigh than a gust of wind through an old house.
Dean lays on his side. Facing Cas. Cas rolls to meet him, and they’re nearly nose to nose. 
Cas reaches over. Runs a hand up Dean’s left side. Gentle. It would be ticklish if he weren’t wearing a shirt.
“You used to be a priss about this, too,” Cas breathes, and kisses him.
It’s soft. Cas’ lips are chapped, but they’re still pillowy. And Cas is warm, his hand solid on Dean’s ribs.
Dean’s eyes fly open. He chokes.
“What?”
This close, he’s treated to quite a show when Cas’ eyes roll.
“Still a priss, then.”
king of negging. there are a lot of things going on in this fic but one of them is that cas wants to fuck dean and is heaping him with the perfect combo of compliments, insults, and commands to make dean want his approval in order to fuck him. and it works. manipulative ❤️
Dean can feel the words against his lips.
Cas flops back onto his back, still watching Dean from the corner of his eye. Dean stays where he is. 
Cas brings a hand up. Cups Dean’s chin. Draws the pad of his thumb across Dean’s bottom lip.
“I can promise you, you’ll get over yourself eventually.” 
Dean licks his lips involuntarily, goosebumps running up his spine, but all he can think of is the man his double shot this morning. It’s called commonplace.
i love it when being gay is a sign of losing yourself. like the thing about endverse dean is that he's a complete ego death for our dean. he does what dean would never do. whether that's coldly kill people he cares about or have gay sex.
“I-” he can’t really speak. He can’t talk to this funhouse mirror image of his friend, this antifuture doppelganger, this Cassandra prophecy. He can’t say who are you. He can’t say who am I.
All he can do is try to prove Cas wrong. Or just try to prove himself.
He takes Cas’ face in his hands. Presses their mouths together with force. Slips his tongue into Cas’ mouth, desperate for a taste of- 
this was about the point where i was like okay if i'm being realistic about dean then i am never getting them into bed together. it's too hard. he's too much of a little bitch about it. i'm gonna need to turn up the "doe-eyed and slack-jawed" slider to max on this one. and on reflection i also just needed him to get manipulated because that was what cas wanted to do. it's enrichment
He feels a little huff of laughter burst from Cas’ chest. Dean rolls, and finds himself straddling him.
“Ooh, forward, ” Cas says when they break apart. Under him Dean can feel Cas’ bony hips digging into his thighs. 
Cas leans back, closes his eyes. Runs two fingers up Dean’s arm, and goosebumps follow. The movement is so easy but Dean can see the tension across Cas’ shoulders. His baggy shirt rides up, and Dean can see just a sliver of soft skin.
i used endverse cas running his fingers up dean's arm in another fic. let it never be said i'm not consistent. anyway i do think cas is a toucher in general and endverse cas, because he fucks constantly, would turn that into a flirting style, you know? and like the thing about cas is he hosts orgies to become a part of something larger than himself and like. touch is part of that. i think endverse cas touches people to hit on them and etc. but he also craves touch and has not been trained out of it as aggressively as canonverse cas was because in canonverse dean really held all the card in that relationship while also like. not being as close to cas. whereas in the nebulous beforetime that i posited previously 1) dean and cas were lovers and 2) they were each other's most important person, depending on each other. it actually seems like cas was more taking care of dean for a while, because dean fell apart when the world ended and cas didn't because like, he had already torpedoed his own life by falling, what did he care.
“Do you know what it was like, having you inside me?” Cas says. Dean’s breath catches, and he can feel his dick perk up.
i hate to write unsubtle sexual arousal like that but needs must.
Cas’ eyes slit open, and he smirks a little. “Get your mind out of the gutter. I meant when I flew you out of Hell.”
this was approximately the point at which i decided that this fic should be normal and not the original weird thing i planned. the thing about castiel mouthgenitalia fic is that i still do desperately want to write it (edit: i did do something a bit to the left in that it wasn't endverse, buuuuuuut...) but i'm not sure it adds that much to endverse. certainly not outside the context of this specific fic. i do kinda miss the original scene i had planned where dean was like [pointing between cas' legs] what the hell is that and cas was like popular among the people of camp chitaqua ;). also i have a great fondness for tangibly inhuman endverse cas <3.
“O-Of course.” Dean swallows.
“Anyways. Angels are… we were built by our Father. Or… we were built for our Father. And every angel… every angel has a hollow. At the center. It’s meant for worship. There’s this emptiness inside us, all of us, and it’s meant to be where we receive His love but…” he trails off. Dean thinks about Cas. His Cas. Was he empty? Was he hungry like that? When Anna said that only four angels had ever met God…
when angels are empty. like the thing about angels is that they were built to love and worship god but they LITERALLY never knew him. and they were never supposed to! isn't that cruel?? like even demons are twisted to love something that is present, even if they are tortured and brainwashed into it. angels are literally built FROM SCRATCH to love god and he never planned to be there. evil evil evil.
“And you… you were vicious. When I picked you up. You didn’t want to go, and I think maybe you were terrified of me, and you screamed and struggled and snarled and snapped and I just… I couldn’t hold you. I couldn’t hold you and fight off the demons that were all over the place trying to stop me. So I just… I took you inside. I took you into the place where my Father was supposed to be. And I… God, I don’t remember what it was like, fighting my way out.” Cas sighs. Takes a deep breath. Dean thinks maybe he remembers. Nothing clear. But a cleansing white light, first shining on him, then all around him. And a feeling of…
i love it when cas puts dean in the hollow where god was. worship. deification. consumption. new forms of daddy kink never before invented.
“I know it was bad. It felt like every demon in Hell was trying to stop me. Maybe they were. But all I could feel was you, this feral thing, biting and scratching so deep in me and it was… it was more than I’d ever felt before.” 
i truly do believe that this is the vibes of what happened in canon. when castiel experiences internal abrasion by tooth or claw resulting in fertilization <3.
Dean can feel the blood rushing in his ears. 
“More than the exhilaration of battle. More than the joy of the Song. More than the horror of an abomination like your brother. It was… God.” Cas shifts under Dean, and Dean thinks he can feel the start of a bulge in Cas’ ridiculous hippie pants.
haha did you catch the double meaning. god is a normal exclamation there but it's also like. "it was god" = deifying dean and the experience of having dean in him where god was meant to be.
 “And when I spat you out, I could still feel it. It was terrifying. I was so empty and now I knew what it was like. You gouged pieces out of me I didn’t even know were there. I couldn’t fill it.” 
Cas fingers Dean’s waistband, slipping the tip of his thumb under to caress the soft skin underneath, and Dean’s stomach muscles clench. He feels his thighs go tight against Cas’ hips. It’s just self-preservation to grab Cas’ wrist.
“You know, I tried. I tried to lose myself in the Song for a long time. Angels aren’t really… we’re not like you. Our minds aren’t… fully autonomous.” Dean can feel Cas’ fingers as he starts fiddling with the button on Dean’s jeans. 
[citation]. i love youuuuu hivemind boy. also. borg drone moment.
“The boundaries between my thoughts and my brothers’ are… it’s not clear where the line is. Or it wasn’t, when I still had brothers. But I tried to lose myself in them, to stop being Castiel and just be an angel, but none of them- I was too different. None of them understood. None of them understood what it was like to have been full and then empty again. I was so alone and I wanted…” Cas lays big hands on Dean’s thighs, grasping the meat of them. Dean shivers. Rolls his hips automatically.
i am always very intrigued about cas as a being discovering desire. like i don't really think of cas as a creature that had an independent, unique will before he was sort of forcibly jolted into the world by dean and the mission. like i think that's how most angels are. they are part of a whole and if they sing out of key they get lobotomized. so cas is like. he is really discovering the twin concepts of desire and dissatisfaction at once. he is the freudian baby removed from the breast and forced to experience that separation for the first time. i've written a lot of other fanfiction about this, or, well, at least two. like the thing about cas is that he's kind of learning emotional maturity on the fly, lmao. like he's never had to regulate his own behavior and emotions before, that's always been done with orders and hivemindiness and punishments and lobotomies. cas has never needed to deal with anything like that before. he's an intellectual adult with the level of emotional experience of a toddler, or rather, he starts that way. he's had to work on it. also note: the implication here is that all of this, the trying to lose himself among his brothers, took place during canon season four and happened with our cas as well.
“God, I wanted. I tried everything. Sex, drugs, and even rock and roll.” Cas’ eyes are wide open now. Open, and clear enough to slice right through him. Clear enough to bite right into him. “ Nothing fills me up like you, Dean.”
can't fill it can you? not with food, drink, not even with sex. i don't think endverse cas is truly pulling a dean here as such. the thing about endverse cas is that he is both a genuine hedonist and also "substituting short term pleasure for long term happiness." like the thing is cas does absolutely enjoy sex drugs and rock n roll but he is also like. one, he has lost the communion of heaven, and two, now that he has truly known desire for the first time he can never unknow it, he will always hunger for more. but also... he does just want dean. like dean is what he wants. if he had dean, that would satisfy him. but he doesn't. so he's kinda fucked.
And Dean remembers now. He remembers being on the rack. Off the rack. He remembers Alastair beside him, whispering in his ear as he- and then remembers the light coming. And he remembers the feeling. 
The inescapable terror of prey.
the thing is. okay. the thing is this fic is one more in a very long line of fanfictions by me in which dean is like. he is tortured by the experience of cas' desire for him. like this fic is more on the "cas' desire is terrifying" side. as i said earlier, cas has only just learned what it is to want. thus his desire is not tempered. it is absolute and demanding and predatory. it consumes and destroys. but i'm also just interested in dean's horror of being desired in general. like the thing about dean is that he is the ken doll he is the marlboro man he is the cowboy and he has to be those things and it tortures him and being desired as those things tortures him more and makes it real. and he's spent his whole life being objectified (sexually and otherwise) in the course of his work as a hunter. like, he's played bait and flirted his way through security doors and kissed monsters to get a spit sample his whole life. he's been valued for what his body can do his whole life. he's been having casual sex with random women because it's what a man does or because it's the only human connection he can get, take your pick, his whole life. he spent his formative years as an extraordinarily beautiful teenage boy hanging around bar rooms and motels on the fringes, places filled with gropey drunk adult men. dean's relationship with other people being attracted to him is going to be tortured at best. like that stuff doesn't come up too much in this fic but it's something on my mind generally when the topic comes up. cas may be fixing to eat dean up, but for dean, it feels like all desire is going too eat him up.
Dean shivers, his mouth too dry to speak. He licks his lips instead.
well. i said all that. but it's also a turn-on, being afraid. at least for dean. he wants to be eaten up so bad.
Cas reaches up to Dean’s shoulder, puts a hand on his sleeve, and Dean can feel something pulse from the scar there. From Cas’ brand on him. Cas grabs him, hand over where they both know the handprint sits on his skin, and pulls him down until Dean is folded nearly in half. Until their noses brush, and Dean can feel Cas’ hot breath on his lips.
“So, if I can’t have every part of you in me,” he traces one finger up the line of Dean’s zipper, “the least you can do is give me your cock.”
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bedlund · 1 year ago
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Started reading DTA and boy… if this isn’t the weirdest least toxic dean rep Ive ever seen and the most insane but accurate cas rep Ive ever seen then idk what is (all positive I’m loving it already onto book 2)
don’t worry he gets crazier. which one? well🤭😉
not that early seasons dean wasn’t toxic but i feel like i have to point out that this is pre-purgatory pre-angels-falling pre-mark-of-cain pre-knowing-about-chuck dean. anyways i love that you love it ❤️ i keep saying i need to get back in there i miss them so much
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chappelroan · 1 year ago
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sometimes it feels like im a fake destiel fan because i refuse to read down to agoncourt but sometimes it feels like im the lurest destiel fan because i wont feed it. i will tolerate an au. mostly beat sheet because that is forever my all time fanned fiction. but because dean is gay. is dean gay faggot kinsey 6 gay in dta? then get back to me. endverse does nothing for me outside OURSIDE of 5x04 but even then 5x03 supernatural free to be you and me does way more for me than The End. because dean and cas are dean. and cas. but
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cas-ettetape · 1 year ago
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Not to be the eternal DTA shill but I feel like I understand the ideal of Dean that Deangirls see through that version of him. Bc unlike canon it is a Dean that a. Has security in Sam's safety while also distance to stop their codependency b. Forcible recovery from substance abuse via illness c. Actual friends and socialization and a stable home/obligations. Despite my #deancrit tendencies I do think that he is very capable of being well and great I just think that canon Dean is Not That and also the show is a series of events putting him in even worse scenarios and digging deeper into the hole
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deanofcas · 4 years ago
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still thinking about that fic... oh my god 
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spnorwhatever · 4 years ago
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endverse, but in a DtA way 
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gayangelcrimes · 2 years ago
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Expanding on this I think dta Cas would like A Montanha Mágica but especially this version
What do yall think Dean and Cas's favorite Legião Urbana songs are. I think Cas's is Monte Castelo and Dean claims his is one of the cooler angrier ones like A Dança or Que País É Esse or O Senhor da Guerra but actually it's O Mundo Anda Tão Complicado (<- guy who is trying to play cool but deep down yearns for a simpler happier life)
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sodomitecastiel · 4 years ago
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Do you have any recommended spn fics? To be restored is consuming all of my non fenario brainspace
This is in no way an exhaustive list - @jewishcharliebradbury is the one to go for that - but these are some favorites of mine, please always heed their tags just in case!
Putting it under a readmore because I'm a wordy bastard:
Sky Verse by starandrea: Angelic civil war! The crispest, most in-character dialogue! Vast, sprawling worldbuilding! Dean and Cas get together and are very bad at it for a long time! This series obsesses me the way other people are obsessed with dta (which I have not read for fear of commitment but fully intend to eventually).
To Be Restored by serenetyfails: You mentioned this one already but it's worth repeating - it's my favorite trans spn fic that I didn't write myself. Cas's transmasc identity is handled so carefully and so competently, Dean flips out in a way that's both in character and still kind to him, and Sam and Rowena are wonderfully fleshed out. I think many people would look at the premise and worry it's either misogynistic or fetishy, but it's neither, it's such a love letter to Cas's well-earned masculinity. Also, I'm obsessed with Rowena knowing and being buddies with a lot of trans women witches :)
Talk Therapy by shara: This is one of my favorite 'Dean is bad at asking for things' fics, it deals with his inability to want things past what he can give to others really well. I also appreciate that not everything in their relationship is fixed just because they're together, although the amount they love each other is always obvious.
Epilogue by JayneL: A weird little time travel story that is NOT a fixit for endverse, but is exceptionally kind to endverse Cas anyway. It aches very badly. I remember it being pretty trippy but also having to sit and look at the ceiling a while after reading it.
The Love Story of the Runner Up by Margo_Kim: Cas dates a normal human man with a good soul for a little while before he gets with Dean. Both of them know it isn't for forever, but they look after each other anyway. Told through the lens of story-swapping between gay friends and written with so much care & love. (You can thank @okologie for finding this one and making me read it despite my reservations.)
where the weeds take root by deathbanjo: Everyone recommends this fic but it's for a reason. Probably the best post-retirement fic there is, and definitely helped me form the neural connections to write Fenario, haha, I can't recommend this one enough. The complicated Dean and Sam issues are held with just as much weight as the Dean and Cas ones, although both are handled gently.
you and me in the war of the end times by stickthelanding (@tallahasseemp3): Alma knocked it out of the park with this one. THEE shotgunning fic. I've reread it more times than I can count, it has the loveliest atmosphere. I want to gnaw on this prose, said with love!
A Drinking Song by Balder12: Endverse snapshot. This one is mostly just bone hurting juice but it's one of my favorite characterizations of them - sometimes I find that endverse stories either make Cas way too soft or fucked up in a way I find goes too far in a direction I don't agree with, this one feels pitch perfect.
Everyone Is Trying to Get to the Bar by Balder12: All time fave angel true form fic!!! It's deliciously weird and fun, definitely a mind-melter. I only read it the once but sometimes I think about it and get a funny little shiver.
Tall Grass by aeli_kindara: This is another 'universal favorite', but also for good reason. Extraordinarily tender, it's my personal favorite Cas-grows-a-garden post canon story, especially because it manages to write a jealousy plotline that doesn't make me want to bite and kill. Dean's voice is exactly right and everything unfurls with this tender inevitability, idk how else to describe it! It also ends on a final image that's so lovely it's seared into my brain.
Dean (and Cas') Top 13 Zepp Traxx by pantheon_of_discord: Nobody does vignettes like supernatural writers. I love the way the road feels in this one, and how carefully picked each moment is. A string of pearls, this fic.
There's Only One Sure Thing That I Know by blinkiesays: Dean and Cas get trapped in the midwest by a curse that doesn't let them leave the state, and they want to break it until they don't. Being trapped gives them an excuse to want to settle down, but the route they take to get there is, of course, circuitous. This one hurts a little because it takes place while Sam is dead, but it isn't gratuitous in its sadness. Sweet and melancholy.
the taste of gravel in the mouth by deathbanjo: FAVE FAVE FAVE FAVE. I push this one at everyone I can. I'm extremely picky about 'Dean's self loathing' fics, mainly because I think it can veer easily into melodrama, but this author weaves Dean's self hatred and his anger together very seamlessly, in a way that feels real to the show. Also, Cas is perfect.
sweeter coming from my hand by perilously: A story that I liked before Nov5 and withstood the test of time!! Dean and Cas get married/soul-bound in order to both remove the Mark of Cain and fix Cas's grace. Features a formative scene for me where Cas expresses worries about if he has a soul and Dean raps knuckles on his chest, going, "knock knock, sounds like a soul in there." If you like this one, perilously has many good fics that are just as in character.
On Labor by a_good_soldier: I very nearly couldn't finish this one, but not because it's bad, haha. The premise just makes me want to tear my clothes in mourning - Dean knows Cas is in love with him, after getting him back from the Empty, and decides that he should give him what he wants without realizing that he wants it too. Dean performatively dating Cas while trying to talk himself into liking it (not knowing that he does actually like it) is exactly the kind of convoluted bullshit Dean's internalized homophobia would do to him. Nauseating and spectacular. Sticks in your brain for weeks.
canticles by 2street2car: An excellent 'weird girl best friends' fic. After striking out at the brothel, Dean decides to treat Cas to the "first date experience" himself, since the guy might die the next day. To sum it up succinctly: the rituals are intricate. And dirty dancing is referenced!
we shovel all the ashes out by xylodemon: As the author states themself, this fic is a love letter to California - it's a road trip casefic that's so rooted in place, the setting is rich and lush and the atmosphere makes me ache, and not just because it's set in my home state! I saved this one for last because this is another prolific author who has many stories I come back to again and again (Sweet Home and Love: A Retrospective are particularly good), they really don't miss. Usually when I read fic, it's a mad dash to the finish, but I took my time with this one. I highly encourage you to do the same :)
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mybrainproblems · 2 years ago
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there are... so many fic that i am daydreaming about and not writing. this feels a tad bit like cheating bc it's only been in my head for about 12hrs now but i'm gonna be thinking about it for a bit. i also know i'm never going to write it bc it would hurt me too much :')
disclaimer that i know next to nothing about DTA. however! inverse version where endverse!cas is flung into s13 instead of cas being resurrected.
endverse!cas being jack's john. a barely-known presence corrupted in the aftermath of a traumatizing death. alienation from your remaining parent who was supposed to love and care for you. dean being happy to have a cas back even if it isn't his cas. a cas whose wings are clipped closer and one who he knows never left (to his own destruction). sam and cas being total strangers, sam knowing nothing about endverse and the fact that this cas has seen him say yes to lucifer. has seen a world destroyed bc of it.
cas finding himself alongside a dean who is hurt but nowhere near as broken as the one who lead him to death. a dean more like the dean he fell in love with.
i absolutely cannot bring myself to write it bc i cannot hurt jack like that. i just cannot.
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bedlund · 3 years ago
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you seem like an expert on fics that really suck you in. I'm officially on winter break and need to recover from school. really looking to feel immersed and get away from it all and just, like, feel everything about destiel all over again
if you follow me you already know what i want to recommend to an ask worded like this.... but i'm going to assume you've already read it and rec some fics set in the same universe instead, just in case you haven't read those:
life before chitaqua: phil, patrol report: phil opposition the orchard the couch scene (cas pov)
and now for the non-dta section:
ghosts that we knew (hits sooo hard, cas is a ghost but it's also kind of like the 'cas takes dean as a vessel' trope)
galveston (no explanation, stream this)
everyone's a critic (when i close my eyes i'm literally watching the hallmark romantic comedy movie adaptation of this fic)
cruel angels (definitely sucks you in, very immersive, very exciting But it's unfinished in a way that was a bit frustrating even for me (big wip enjoyer) i'd say it's still worth it though!)
of the unlocking and the lift away (oh naur a wip... i don't care you all need to read this. Now.)
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tiktaalic · 2 years ago
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I recently finished dta and I feel like I gotta spread the gospel. the thing about dta. is that it has the best cas. he has infinite knowledge. he’s the funniest bitch alive. he’s autistic. he invents a new element and tries to name it deanium. he makes intense crazy declarations to dean at the drop of a hat. he has several best friends. he’s strange and offputting. everyone wants to fuck him. he grows out his hair. he acts murderous and violent and dean is like ☺️ that’s my guy. he thinks religious ritual is sexy. he never lies but yes he does. no he doesn’t. he experiences infinity-induced delirium. he has to be swaddled and cared for. he finds both horror and beauty in humanity. I love him your honor.
to clarify, having not read ack I don’t know how the horrifying aspects compare. some of the things in that dta chapter are genuinely very upsetting so this is very much a heads up to read the warnings on that chapter. but also overall. I do think that taking the fucked up things in supernatural to their logical conclusion with the full weight of what that means. is a plus side of the story.
the other thing about dta is that in book 4 it takes a turn for the very intense which kinda blindsided me. however, I haven’t read ack yet, but I get the impression that you like a fucked up little story about the characters having massive issues. so as long as you read the warnings it should be cool. final word is I like your supernatural opinions and I think you could be a dta understander.
LOVE AND LIGHT i kn ow i am literally a supernatural blog but. i am not reading all that (dta). if im gonna sink time into a game of thrones length text it will be. gamey thrones and not supernatural fanfiction. i am not huge on fanfiction in general and even less huge on longfic its something i read when im on a plane. everyone i know whos read dta tastes i trust completely but my sticking points are. a) lol im not reading all that and b) im just. not intae endverse as an ongoing spool of narrative. no ones ever pitched The Dread as part of dta which is intriguing i am intrigued. that and the fever dreams no one EVER mentions and then i find out and im like. what the hell you guysyou did nt tell me there were compelling aspects in there. i dont think i will ever in my life overcome the momentous inertia that means i havent read it yet. the only scenario i can think of where i read dta is that the books appear on my door step without me buying them and i happen to have the slowest week of work in my life
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