#i fear how long its gonna be
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Tootega dithered, one foot on the steps and grip tight on the handrails. For the first time, he looked at Zanna and found no outright malice in her expression. Her face was even, and she kept his gaze for as long as he dared to look, Bergstrom’s dopey grin just besides her. Tootega shook his head, made a motion that David presumed was the equivalent of a Catholic crossing themselves, and stepped back onto the tarmac.
“If this kills me, I’ll haunt you forever.” He said, and David was not certain exactly who he was indicting. “Bloody fucking ravens.”
(hehe it's happening)
#rangnar rambles#wow these characters are having such a good time. i sure hope there isnt some kind of foreshadowing in this flashback#truly i should have 1- a writing tag and 2- tags for different fics huh#ehh ill do it eventually#i planned this thang to fuck and back and insanely. it is so easy to write when you know where things are going. crazy i know#been thonking about this fic for at least 10 months tbf#i fear how long its gonna be#its 14 chapters but i couldnt guess how many words they shake out to be#i was getting stressed about chapter lengths being different and then remembered i never care about that in published books so meh#i also... made it 14 so i can use an album for the chapter titles... and if it was less or more i wouldve had to think harder 😔👉👈#purely 4 the drama (its not based on the album it just bangs)#anywho. im outta the country for a week. i cannot imagine having something finished in that time but who knows.
0 notes
Text
oh damen we're really in it now.mp4
#caprisun#captive prince#damen#damianos of akielos#damen of akielos#kings rising#prince's gambit#ITS HIM ITS MY GUY#also can i just say#i know i made him blush in the rip pitcher sketch because thats the correct interpretation of that scene. cuz he saw his thighs#but can we all agree that those must be the palest pastiest legs a man has ever put in direct sunlight#diogenes said to plato “this is a man” about that peeled chicken because he mistook it for Laurent in a chiton#i bet he burns like a lobster#you leave him in direct sunlight for too long and he starts heaving like an office laptop from 2016 booting up Baldurs Gate 3#i am still in the middle of book 3 and when i tell you i am in DIRE NEED OF SOME LAURENT POV DECRIPTIONS OF DAMEN#TELL ME HOW LOVELY HE IS I NEED YOUR PASTY ASS TO SAY IT#I want to hear those rapid fire thoughts because you just know he is extinguishing them like summertime mosquitos#if the govart dies chapter is anything to go by#damen oh damen you really thought ancel was gonna shove that stick up his ass during that one performance. i love you.#you are THE funniest motherfucker in that book and your obsession with that blue eyed featherless biped only adds to it#who drops a pitcher when they see a white boy approach#god out of fear maybe#i would never live it down straight up never#that memory instantly became damen's dark horse in the championships for the most embarrassing shit that he will think about in bed at nigh
1K notes
·
View notes
Note
sorry if you've already mentioned but what (re?)ignited your love of comics/x-men/cherik? curious because there are so many different adaptations of them
i think im gonna speak for a few (or a lot of) people when i say that TL;DR the wolverine x deadpool movie that came out this summer is what pulled me back into comics and i COULD leave it there but i will go into excruciating and unnecessary detail instead because i love an origin story and i love oversharing.
under the cut tho because im nice sometimes (there's also wxdp doodles in here. if you want to see that)
ironically (and probably commonly), growing up i was more of an avengers kid. Kinda. Loosely <- binge watched the cartoons and movies and read copious amounts of comics and fics and i am hoarding fanart in my old dresser as we speak ok 'loosely' is a modest lie.
embarrassingly i remember getting into discus cause of captain america LMAO so yeah needless to say i was a Humble Fan- me joining my school's comic class/club didnt help either (shoutout to my teach from that she was the realest one out there for. A Multitude of reasons). she definitely is was inspires me to even draw still and make comics and i often think bout the tips i learned from her class tbh she was great
back to the movies t and comics tho, i got into em because my brother would offer to take me and that's how we'd hang out (i rarely saw movies in theaters and i even more rarely went anywhere as a teenager. still kinda like that today tbh ooops) and yk. it just snowballed after that.
my brother and i have always liked comics- he just more than me for a while (though he still very much loves comics and As We Know From My Posts we still talk about them whenever i see him To An Exhausting Degree)
durin then i was really into stony and i have a few surviving doodles i made but those are between me and god. and anyone who asks tbh LOL
'snap can you make this related to x-men again this is long' ok so fast forward to This Summer again I Still Don't Really See Movies but my brother offered to take me and this was the first time i'd actually seen an x-men movie in full
as a kid i only remember seeing the 'perfection' scene between erik and raven in first class while i was channel surfing. pretty sure i changed the channel after seeing mystique naked cause i was scared my parents would get mad at me if they caught me watching it LOL
BUT MOVING ON As A Kid i think it's also natural you'll sometimes watch 92 if it's on And I Did though evidently it didn't stick too hard (i do remember really liking beast and gambit though.... still do really): my knowledge of x-men was. INCREDIBLY sparse. like diabolically so so i didnt have too much expectations (aside from the fact i vaguely liked deadpool beforehand).
tbh i dont know why my bro never took me to see any of the x-men movies. it's not like he doesn't Also like x-men (90% sure nightcrawler's his favorite but my brother will be caught dead saying he has absolute favorites like that)- he owns a bitch load of deadpool comics/omnibus sets too (of which ive read over the years and reread this year) but Shrug moving on
Much Like Most Of The Internet i fell down the rabbit hole that way. i have some doodles i made a couple days after seeing WxDP that i now have an excuse to throw at all of you Look And Perceive
and so. As I Do. i got curious and told myself i'd binge watch all the x-men movies the week before i went back to school And Then I Did ft. My Brother Sometimes and then i said i'd binge watch all of '92 and And I Did That ft. My Brother Sometimes But Less So and now we're here. currently watching Evolution...
once i got to school i realized i lived near a comic shop and started getting into the comics that way (the first ones i got since going down this rabbit hole was Magneto Was Right!, The Resurrection of Magneto, and The Trial of Magneto. if you were curious !!!!! clearly i didnt care too much about context i just needed to see My Guy jelvejlkvj i have no regrets and Evidently ive read more since)
i'm pretty sure what dragged me into cherik specifically was the fact i saw a clip of The Famous ending to 92 where erik's aghast at the notion jean even has to question his love for charles. i think that was what officially had me refocus my lens on them: not a single poolverine thought after that LOL (all the cherik posting i saw on twitter definitely helped too but that was the nail in the coffin for any other interests i had: i was locked into cherik and x-men in general now)
that clip specifically, i was surprised at the fact they- frequently even- have the x-men franchise say erik loves charles and vice versa so bluntly. even if it's not meant to be romantic, i fear im just a fan of how casually the word's thrown around with them two and i got tender bout it all. Then Yk. i just live for the drama. the hilarity even. the sincerity .... they make me sick if i think of them too long so im gonna end it here
before i go tho ironically enough, the first x-men issue i owned was This one (story a this is that while stuck in some wacko dimension charles accidentally gets himself trapped in logan's mind while utilizing his astral projection. if you were curious). pretty sure i got it for free with another comic set i got years ago since our old comic shop loved to do that, but it's poetic aint it. maybe ill doodle something referencing it..
i should probably look into finishing this arc someday im Dummy curious to even know how it started and how it ends.....
#snap chats#usually this onea them posts i ramble bout in the tags but i have photos and this is Long long so .. i use the main body for once ...#sorry i gave a biography but i never talk to people and i also love typing. im one of those party can-of-worms i fear#i feel like i could talk about this forever because x-men itself has never been super prominent in my childhood#it was just kinda there in the background BUT comics themselves have always been with me. theyre a keystone to me i think#but yeah. x-men definitely sticks a lot harder than avengers does now OOPS this is not me taking shots i am just SAYING#i have a lot of old marvel doodles tbh .. i found an old deadpool one i remember drawing with my bro during a car ride#kinda funny how much my bro and i bond i dont think of it much but I Guess thats another reason why comics are special to me#we dont bond much- i dont bond with my fam in general tbh we're kinda. Isolated in a way LOL so its cool we're tight at least#if you wanna go deeper bout Comics And My Family my dad really liked comics growing up- more dc tho maybe#apparently he used to draw hulk a lot but if he did those drawings are loooong gone.. at least i know who to blame for me drawing#he loves superman tho. i remember id get embarrassed watching superhero cartoons and superman was on screen when he was around#for some reason i thought id get in trouble if he caught me watching superman but when he did once he was real happy so. tf wrong with me#he loves to say hes superman a lot and id be like Dad... Stop... LMAO but in the cheesiest way possible he do be my hero so. accurate ig#but yeah thats my origin story for why i like comics again thank you for reading if you actually read all that#and sorry it got all sappy Unfortunately i be like that sometimes. i am very emotionally constipated and i over explain a lot#ok i fr gonna end it here im gonna keep going by accident if i thinka any longer and i have stuff i still have to do
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just sped read two chapters (I’ll have to update on later) but imma be honest people: I am on chapter 61 (or I guess it’s the next one I read? Idk words🤦♀️) and I am feeling very real fear right about now👀🫥😬😅 like I got a few pages in & was like; mmm… yeah… no…this is gonna keep me up finishing this book (and I cannot be drowsy working tomorrow)… but like… Rowan is sneaking out… and it’s stupid Maeve (I really do hate her and she’s only been in like 2 chapters and I am so over her)… and it’s worse cause I KNEW IT the second Elide was like “Lorcan’s restless” I was like ITS MAEVE PROXIMITY but ANSEL JUST GAVE ME HOPE! and Lysaedion😊🥹 & Manorian😉😂 are being allllll cute! And then Rowaelin because ROWAN IS HAPPY😭 for once in 2 centuries this man is smiling & SJM has the nerve to say “the spark went out” (writing this like she isn’t the genius author that created everything and is instead some random opinion😂) and now I’m scared because they’re all toooooo happy???… like oh yeah we’re kinda happy — until… idk… I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS; she just left me on THAT… THATS THE PROBLEM & fuck fuck fuck this CANNOT end well😅😅 but Dorian said Asterins alive? BUT WHERE IS ABRAXOS? And everyone’s been warning me & I am STILL NOT ready at all in the slightest… UGHHHHWHHHHHYYYYYY (they deserve an ACOFAS style fluff book after this😭) and I guess I just need to schedule finishing this book and reading all of tower of dawn cause I can’t with these cliffhangers anymore😅😅
#quick typed long ramble of reading update fangirl nonsense cause the feels#first read#currently reading#next chapter#Chapter 61#EoS#Empire of Storms#Empire of Storms spoilers#no spoilers please#fangirl problems#don’t hurt my babies#SARAH WHERE IS THIS GOING#very real kinda fandom fear here#ROWAN DONT LEAVE#AELIN WHAT DID U SAY WAS IT NAMELESS WAS IT A FIRE GOING OUT HOF STYLE ARE YOU MESSING WITH ME#ELIDE WHOS TALKING TO YOU#ANSEL COULD YOU BE MORE GLORIOUS#DORIAN HOW ARE YOU JUST HOW ARE YOU BUT LIKE HOW DO YOU EXIST CAUSE WOW JUST HOW#MAEVE GO BURN YOURSELF UP IN ELLYWE OR FALL IN THE OCEAN OR SOMETHING PLEASE#FENRYS WHAT DID THAT MEAN#WHERE IS GAVRIEL#WHAT IS AELIN PLANNING#IF SHE HAS NO PLAN I PANIC#ITS GONNA HURT ME AND I JUST KNOW IT#ON THIS HILL PROCRASTINATING#HERE WE GO AGAIN#AT LEAST TOD HAS YRENE#I MISS THEM#AGH#headesk all caps keyboard smash except I didn’t type this in caps lol
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
hey uncle nina do u happen to have that one para where u talked abt how jersey couldn't say ily during sbst and stan was like super sad abt it? i tried looking for it on ur blog but i can't find it</3
t-the...
tHE DIVORCE PARA???>?@?@?@?3/2/
YOU WANT THE FUCKDISNFN DIVORCE PARA????!!!?!?!
noooooOOOOOOoOooOo!!!!!!!!! :'(
i......Siiiigh.
goddamnit, guys. what happened to 'we hope you heal, uncle nina!' wAS IT NOT ENOUGH THAT I DIED ONCE??? I GOTTA DIE TWICE?!
but....because i love you very much, i will link it for you.
edit: oh god, i am reading it rn and it is soooo rough, i'm am so sorry. cringe. goofy aa. oof. later today, i might reopen it and just so we can suffer i will have it start mid sbst ( which, assumes i can write the smut which, no promises ) and then have it end with ravenstan leaving ( fuuuck lmao, like that fight does not even end there, we're in H-E-L-L holy shit ) because i hate my life but...anyways....
without further ado,
Please Enjoy The WORST
( and i do mean THE /WOOOORST/ )
Part Of Your Day...Maybe Your Life.
-uncle nina, who is going to request a lobotomy at her doctors appointment to forgot the divorce happened.
#yall would do this to me#right before my doctors appt#GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD#no i am so sad i am actually so sad and this is just a fragment of it the whole thing is so fucking upsetting and sad#LIKE HE WANTED TO SAY IT HE JUST CANT HE HAS TRAUMA LIKE HE MEANS IT THO HE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#it was so horrible like the second raven realizes that hes just#been saying i love you this whole time#and jersey has just been saying me too#FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK#HORRIBLE#AND DURING SBST TOO LIKE MAN WHAT THE FUCK#MID SBST LIKE THAT IS JAIL WORTHY THEY WERE HAPPY#and when i tell u ravenstan NEVER EVER EVER GETS MAD EVER you know it was GNARLY u know it ruined his life </3#lover boy king wow its so horrible bc like no one has ever loved anyone more that jk loves rs too hes just a weapon#and doesnt know how to emote and turned that part of his brain off and cant switch it back on and its scary and#dO YOU SEE HIM STRUGGLIN LIKE JK NEVER EVER EVER BEGS ANYONE AND HE WAS ON HIS HANDS AND KNEES#SCARY ASS JK LIKE SCARY AS FUCK LIKE WHIMPERING AND SHAKIN HE WAS SO SCARED HE WAS INCONSOLABLE#and it triggerin a rs bp episode and him goin out into the snow in a tshirt and shorts and Leaving which is jks WORST FEAR#like losing him AGAIN???? AND ITS HIS FAULt#help im gonna end it all if you dont hear from me im ruined#jk cried after that btw for the first time in a very long time#and he did it alone and in rs clothes knees to his chest :(
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
no actually it is kind of a wonder to me how pb is operating with whb like it is bc. arent yall also hosted (i believe anyways im not sure if their partnership w/ erolabs goes beyond that) by another company w/ SEVERAL gachas under its belt. so whats goin on here. nobody taking notes? are we doing market research? is anyone even play testing. hello. its so dark in here
#cliffnotes/.txt#whb#LIKE. atp im just here to see how long it lasts#not even a full year yet and honestly it srarted going downhill december....#i feared back in march they were gonna be trying to do passes monthly and its not a good look. thats like ~60 per month#thats a bill payment.#even subscription based mmos dont cost that much.#and lets be frank the game is not of any sort of quality that justifies $60 for a jpeg (and imo a lackluster side story)#like sry u can only use the company size as an excuse for so long and i will never dickride a company ever#but its. man.#i am interested in the game and its characters and story if we could GET TO ITTTTT#RAHHHH#atp im like is anyone trying to make sure this game lasts. it feels like its gotta be fully aware sabotage now#bc these choices arent making sense unless the point is truly just a quick buck#theres some useful little changes here and there but. man#it get overshadowed by the greed real quickly#i dont even care abt beel either just on principle. this is. a real head scratcher.#also this has been in my drafts since may if that means anything.#i just rewrote my tags 😭
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go
(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)
#today's gone Badly and i'm upset but instead of venting abt it i'm gonna channel that energy into doing a bit of tag rambling abt Boothill#well. less abt Him and more abt uh. self-analyzing my anxiety surrounding contributing to fandoms. he's just today's catalyst#like. i know it's mostly a me thing. i'm hypersensitive to criticism and very conflict avoidant + socially anxious + perfectionistic etc.#so I'm the one that keeps myself from posting more stuff out of fear of being criticized or called-out for what i've made#bc inevitably Someone's gonna see it and think its OOC or a problematic take or they'll misread my intent. etc etc what have you#but like. that's inevitable. there's no way to communicate every single thing with all of the nuance required to avoid misunderstandings#and other times it's not a misunderstanding it's just a difference of opinions and that's Fine!! there's no accounting for personal taste#there's no accounting for several things actually. taste‚ bias‚ lore-knowledge‚ differing levels of chronic-online-ness‚ etc#so this isn't me complaining abt the state of fandom culture (although i do think. sometimes. ppl take shit a bit too seriously)#but anyways all of this is mostly just anxiety-fueled. it's not like i very often actually even receive negative feedback or anything#if anything ppl tend to tell me that i'm overthinking it and killing my own fun and worried that my stuff is more OOC than it is#which like. yeah. Yeah u right :) but that's just the way that i am! always losing the idgaf war i suppose#anyways what's Boothill got to do w this ur wondering. well. i've been thinking abt the quickly emerging concept that he's illiterate.#and it just. has me feeling a lot of ways. and watching ppl disagree over it has me feeling some Bad ways. bc it's def a loaded topic!#if you'll pardon the pun there. and i don't rlly have anything new to add other than that i'm conflicted abt it.#like yeah i saw the leaks days ago. of him mentioning 'not hitting the books' much as a child when we ask him why he sends voice messages#or voice Transcriptions ig. ykwim. and like. *braces for impact* ...i liked it? like. it doesn't feel right to call it endearing#i'm not trying to infantilize him. ok that's not the right word either but ugh. you know? what i mean?? who am i kidding even i don't know#it's not quite right to say that it feels like Representation either. but it's something close i guess#as a southern person myself who didn't receive a 'complete' education due to factors that weren't to do with my intelligence#the concept of seeing him as a capable force to be reckoned with and respected who also happens to have not received much formal education#i like that. i do. but there's so many issues w it at the same time. like. as i said‚ being southern myself has me Wary of the way Hoyo is-#writing him. as well as of the way that the fandom is taking the bits of his lore and running away w them. and i'm Very aware of how ppl-#will see a southern character and be All Too Eager to agree that they're lacking intelligence based on our Redneck™ stereotype#sigh. and before we even go too far with this. it's not even confirmed that hes completely illiterate. which is a valid criticism i've seen#there's Multiple reasons that could make him prefer voice to text. but regardless. i'm just worried that ppl will misconstrue my intentions#like. example: that edit i made the other day of him saying 'no thanks i can't read'. wasn't me playing into the stereotype of-#'haha dumb country boy can't read!' it was. in my eyes. something he'd say as a joke to make light of a potential insecurity#like. i think there's far more depth to Boothill's character if ppl could look past the surface. and i dont wanna contribute to the problem#but sometimes ppl Will have stereotypical traits and i wish the same could apply to characters as long as it's done Thoughtfully.
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
FROM THE START self-love and acceptance has been one of the major themes of the series and if ANYONE could benefit from that tigress is RIGHT THERE
#will we ever get closure over her and shifu. will we ever get to see her confront her fear of BEING feared#WILL WE EVER GET TO SEE HER LOVE HERSELF OR CONFRONT HER ABANDONMENT ISSUES#like. she's not just hardcore and untouchable. she loves just as much as everyone else and wants to BE loved#i will die so mad that they left her so unexplored#WHAT IS THE POINT OF SETTING HER UP AS TAI LUNG'S ANTITHESIS#AND AS THE YIN TO PO'S YANG IF ITS NEVER EXAMINED#like. it's SHOWN. we see how their development has affected the other but it's never focused on for more than a scene#they make me curl up all dead and janky like a spider they make me so sick and ill#and from a writer's perspective THAT'S INTENTIONAL. SO WHY AREN'T WE MAKING IT HAPPENING#kfp#im just disappointed and miss her soooo much#i knew it'd be a long shot to hope for a tigress-centered movie considering we got a short (which I love w all my heart)#but like. i feel like that will-smith-displaying-wife meme#you set up all that gorgeous heartache and we're NOT gonna go into it??#tigress#ok but if you are in need of smth like that i cannot recommend KFP: One Thousand Years of Peace enough#its on ao3 it's a tigress self-love story it focuses so wonderfully on each of the five and it's tipo and it's POETIC CINEMA
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
How do I say, without coming across as a jaded miserable little bitch who likes raining on everybody's parade, that the PJO Disney plus adaption is nostalgia bait, in the same way that their live action remakes are
#it'll probably be good#it sounds like its gonna be a pretty faithful adaption#im not denying that#but#20-30 something year old you ARE being pandered to by the Walt Disney Corporation#its fine to be excited for it. just so long as we are all aware of whats happening#also we gotta stop acting like mr riordan is some underdog in this situation#hes written one of the most successful teen lit series of all time#and in disney's current quirky girl phase of grasping hold of anything that already has a following#of COURSE they snatched this shit up#''Percy Jackson. A Disneyplus original.''#do you have any idea just how much theyre salivating to have their name attached to this series?#(tbf the books were owned by disney too. but a streaming service makes their link to the franchise all the more evident)#anyway. maybe i sometimes get a little bitter when i think about all the original projects in production that were abruptly cancelled#usually because of the current fear to take risks and put something new into the world#and then i remember adaptions like are going ahead#there is no risk associated the pjo series. the first few books are relatively squeaky clean for a teenage audience#this is a comfortable direction for them to go in#''but but but theres gay people in it'' hush. disney is not afraid of captilizing on the gay experience#also im pretty sure the gay people dont show up until like. 8 books in#thats 8 seasons#can you imagine#''guys we need to keep giving this show our support so we can eventually get solanjello (or whatever its called)''#ooooh theyre quite evil. very interesting#even tho like. dont worry you'll get your gay people eventually. you'll get all your book adaptions. you'll get all those seasons.#this franchise is disneys new pet#you can smell it#the hype. the cast announcements. the promotion#LIN MANUEL MIRANDA???#theyre going to squeeze every last drop of engagement they can get out of it
71 notes
·
View notes
Text
mad w power rn
#i am following crashsune academys 3d character modelling tutorial playlist#i tried to just do a cadaver turnaround in this style but then i got annoyed so im just winging it while kinda following the base they#provided. i fear the boots r way too high poly i hope they wont stand out ... i just got excited bc i was like. actually able to do that on#my own likee i modeled them yk. very exciting stuff#but the original shoes r like. far simpler. they were like 9 sides or something#i got annoyed abt cadaver bc of the skirt idk how to make a long skirt work with like. the bones and stuff... wuthout it being weirdness...#my true hearts wish is to do scientist but ill experiment w cj first bc ill feel less bad if she looks a bit wonky JKDBKAJBFW#Now im allowed to add my tags and tumblr wont try to scare me. ok#'is this gonna be another cj in his underwear' IM SORRY!!! I JUST IMAGINE IT WOULD LOUNGE AROUND IN UNDERWEAR ALL THE TIME ITS NOT MY FAULT#if i can figure out how to give it a long skirt and still be able to walk without being weirdness i will be doing that. or i can just put#her in pants i never put it in pants anymore. its always just black turtleneck + dress overtop. and the reason is bc shirt w dress overtop#is My main outfit ever. sry. sue me. lock me up. take me out back and shoot me
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey so Snap this is going to be so fucking weird, but honestly don’t care. So I was watching a clip of Drag Race Philippines and it was the make over episode and I think they were making over family members and this father was all about getting into drag. So, I just wanted to tell you never forget how much of a lovely loving kind and caring father you have, who loves you and protects you and makes you feel heard. That’s all.
i'd have to die before i forget how great my dad is thank you for the opportunity to brag about him again anon
#snap chats#no smarmy one-sentence response i fear i never play about my dad's character and its been. A Month so i gotta be earnest#Comically And Topically tho i still wonder wtf my dad meant when he said 'i always thought of being a girl' when i opened up to him#part of me thinks he was just joking and thats probably it but also ....... //audible confusion + vine boom + eyebrow quirking//#its so funny you brought up my dad though i was thinking of visiting him this weekend#last week my Bitch Ass Mom wanted to watch a movie with me and since speak no evil was coming out i proposed we see that#since starting therapy shes been 'trying' to be closer with us but she still doesnt like me on a fundamental level so get bent ig#but she hates horror movies and made a whole show of not wanting to go and how american movies are so brutal and blah blah#this was right after she took me ice skating with her .. cause shes obsessed with ice skating now ... like maam please#i like skating so thank you but ... idk ... she never wants to do things i wanna do#then again we're pretty different i think so. LOL sorry i like horror movies and nothing you like apparently#im glad she didnt come cause i just went with my bro and since the theater was Virtually Empty we just cracked jokes the whole time vjlaekv#plus i just know my mom wouldve been annoying and i wanted to enjoy the movie !!!! which i did ty !!!!!!!#but yk who LOVES horror movies and who i used to watch horror movies with all the time growin up !!!!!!!!!!#i havent seen a movie with my dad in forever.... the last one we saw was so long ago but it was some weird owen wilson movie i think#wait now that ive dragged my mom into this she started therapy Did I Share That. Im Reminding You Anyway#but the most vile thing i ever heard her say was that she admitted to me she never loved my dad 'emotionally'#like wow ..... a thousand life times in hell for you i think i cant even begin to describe the rage chat i could write a novel#but i only have 30 tags so i wont. i should call my dad tho.. this is inspiring me to call my dad thank you anon#if youre still reading Double Thank You. i havent complained about my mom in a while and this was just funny timing overall vjRLKJAEVK#ok im gonna go talk with my dad now. my college friend's coming oevr in like three hours and we're gonna watch glass#cause that came up in convo yesterday Long Story so that should be funny vjlekjlakj
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
🤹
#bo posting#vent#i was gonna posy this with a picture of croutons but that felt wrong shxjdh#uh im. scared i wont be able to draw again consistently for a while#i think im really accepting just how burnt out i am#i dont like the fear. anxiety. and envy ive been bottling up about drawing lately#like its not doing me any good to avoid everything artistic just bc i cant draw rn#but im... afraid that this will last for a long time#the last time this happened i barely drew for 2 years straight#i dont think im conveying just how painful and stressful this actually is. im not okay and im struggling to accept this#and its fucking depressing too?? i feel miserable knowing i cant do shit for my ocs and cant contribute creatively w friends#i just... feel like im... like not fun to be around rn ig? like a killjoy? a haunting presence who cant offer anything new or fun#im really debating reaching out and offering refunds to people who commed me#at least if they dont want to keep waiting#because idk when ill be able to get them done and i feel incredibly guilty#🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
@strdstd replied to your post:
{...Pyro Boothill thinkings are being thunked-}
👀
#strdstd#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//This idea has reached you so now I raise: WHAT IF THIS CONCEPT BUT APPLY IT TO KHAENRI'AHNS#//What of part of the immortality curse is the fact that they can get torn apart/killed; and no matter how brutal; they just#//CANNOT die#//And suffer every moment through the revival process#//Shit like Halfdan in the Chasm is actually a mercy bc they've been freed from that terrible cycle#//but ye#//Thinkings of Dain just#//Heckin SUFFERING every time he gets slaughtered during a bout with a Herald/Lector#//And as he's wheezing that telltale rattle of a dying breath; he bleakly knows he's just gonna have to get up and keep fighting#//he will NEVER know peace#//And curses his own existence as his vision fades; knowing he will experience the trauma and sweet release of death only BRIEFLY#//Before he will inevitably snap awake in agony and have to bear it until every wound is healed and he is 'whole' again#//Knowing more of his body will prolly have been afflicted with Abyssal energy in the process#//Each 'death' and 'revival' making him more and more afflicted with it each and every time as it keeps thinking it needs to 'fix' its host#//Which is worse for him over most Khaenri'ahns considered he's so entrenched and exposed to such energy in his fight#//...or is that too dark kjdkgfg#//Okay adding to this bc I realized I veered lol#//BH gaining that sort of ability with a Pyro Vision is GOD TIER#//Bc can you imagine him dying for the first time with it#//And feeling such terrible FEAR all he's done is for naught; his family will go unavenged#//Only for the Instant the darkness closes on him; he feels such horrible AGONY and snaps back awake with a gasp#//He's still himself with his cyborg body; but he's ALIVE and RESTORED before his deathwound even if a lil banged up#//And each subsequent 'death' only serves to make him more and more reckless as he realizes he ain't got nothin to lose#//Tumbling further into the self-dehumanizing as seeing himself & his body as nothing more than a means to an end#//Bc now more than ever he 'doesn't matter' nor does worrying abt going 'too far' and 'self-destructing'#//Not realizing each 'death' is actually traumatizing him in the long run; no matter how cool he tries to play it#//Worse still if each 'death' leaves those very killing wounds marked on his body as reminders#//And each subsequent revival only tires him out more than more (bc it must rlly take a LOT of out him)
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
feeling complicated things this wednesday at 2pm
#thinking abt how at the tail end of high school both friend groups Completely cut me off..one because 1 girl was jealous the other#was soending more time with me and was tired of being essentially bullied by her. but not enough to not cut me out :')#and the other bc the Main Girl decided she didnt like me calling her out for being a jackass so she condemned me and the rest were too#afraid to challenge her lol. they ended up literally replacing me with a kid 2 yrs younger that i had previously been assigned as big siste#to??? lol and even she was happy to be included which. fine she was a kid not really her fault#but then 1 month after graduating wgich i sat thru Alone omi had her 1st stroke and then the hospital failed to notice the 2nd one she had#in their care. so my best and only friend in the world had her life stolen from her and her biggest fear realized overnight.#so ofc i completely shut down and ny mom is so personally offended by this she becomes wildly cruel and bullies the fuck out of ME#and i had already been suicidal for like a decade at that point and was Only staying alive for her sake. suddenly that was all for nothing#so i give up get into drugs and alcohol after having never touched any if it VEHEMENTLY being against it at all but fuck it at that point#which spirals into me dating my ex who was my new boss after my parents forced me to get a new job despite already deciding i was gonna kms#so he sexually harasses me until i say sure fuck it why not . except it turns out i fall in love easily. bc i had never dated before.#and then im public enemy number one for this and all the family friends and STRANGERS regardless of watching ne grow up or not#decide to jump on the lets attack slash be rude to slash bully this kid even more so they KNOW we dissaprove#anyway. its been a very long 9 years.#this is me Still leaving significant shit out too. god lol i was ROBBED of my early adulthood truly
4 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi nina!! can we plz see some of the char sheet youre doing?
AWWWW!!!! this is so sweet, omg. ;-; <3
i fucking LOVE character sheets sm; it is a relic from when i first broke into writing online and used to tumblr rpg ( cringe ). i just feel like they really help you see and understand your characters and figure out what they look like, how they act, what their motivations are, etc.
but yes!!!! i spend a lot of time on them and i haven't had a lot of time...recently, so i haven't been able to work on the ones i have for The Nasty Nina Boys From ( Fine As ) Hell, but you can have this little section i started on appearance in the ravenstan one ( he has been on my mind a lot lately, i srsly love him so much, he's my baby )
i'll drop it under the cut for you <3
-uncle nina, tumblr rpg survivor, char sheet queena
#AAAAAA#this is so cute idk i get excited#when people ask me for character des#and character stuff where i go into crazy detail#hopefully the sex/gender identity was stated correctly#i try to consult my trans friends and do research often#anyways in case u were wondering how ravenstan's hair looks to me idk i'm sorry its not as nasty as yall probably think it is#its v chaotic blonde bi roxstar s4 eren yeager izumi miyamura#thats my closest approximation i fear#it gets touched up a lot and always kinda looks good...Sigh.#i did give him my Trich tho god bless him it sucks :/#and my bipolar like he really is my son huh#but yeah i hope u think its cute there are like 73209473 sections but they take me a while bc i like to go into#Laser Focus Amounts Of Detail but bc i can't draw and i can only write as vividly as i can i hope its a good visual ref#also i love him i love the lil half up half down stan hair style i'm sorry ur gonna have to pry that out of my cold dead hands#also his lil hipdips he is saur cute i love him so bad#his legs are lowk long hi model rstan#i keep forgetting hes Tall in the platforms love that#when i tell u the shit-izens of south park were telling stan routinely at like 11 that he should model...honestly i see it#he do be slouching tho modelling agencies would hate him like why is this man fine as hell and burping Out Loud???#and putting his feet up on the couch and being DISGUSTIN#yeah...yeah...anyways i love him thank u for asking#nina character sheet supremacy BABEY
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
can I be vulnerable with u guys tonight the only thing I actually want for my birthday is a hug. just one i dont wanna be greedy that's all 🥹
#like a proper one. feasibly achievable but will i ask for one? no 💞#the boundaries i set for physical contact out of fear of making other people uncomfortable are unfortunately set in stone#i will not be initiating anything ever until i feel safe enough around another person to do so#have i ever felt safe around another person in my life? ahahahahahaha. lets not answer that#its just been a week. and a whole year. and a lot of good things have happened this last year but its still been a hard one!#and I would just like to be held a little while. I know I could want a lot more than that but it feels beyond even imagining#its ok tho im gonna get cake and maybe some new work clothes. might go to the cinema but depends on how sick i feel..#if i dont ill watch a movie at home instead. and ill call my parents too and do my ironing. i dont think theres anything else#apart from gp registration but not counting it as part of my plans bc its a Necessity not optional 😡😡 ive left it too long already#sigh okay going to sleep for real now i tried an hour ago but couldnt. shakes my fist at my meds. hope my dr gets back to me tmr#.diaries
2 notes
·
View notes