#i dunno i just feel like no matter what i write people won't be happy with it which is Also why it's taken me to so long

[arklayraven]

Just felt like writing this out. Just thinking about the accidental ways Ren and Sol could kill their Angel / Soulmate/pumpkin.

⚠️ Warnings: Mention of death, accidental murder, suicide, angst, reader death, other stuff I'm dunno how to tag. PROCEED WITH CAUTION.⚠️

Fatal Mistake

He was just trying to keep you safe, he thought locking you up in a room for a bit would be good, while he handled the final lose end in your life. Then finally you both can live the happy ending you both deserved together.

He said he'll be back, gave you a kiss and hug before leaving. But then something happened. He was gone for hours...DAYS...

He was cursing the people, the situation that kept him away from you, but he had to also not push it. Else he may never leave.

Though after he had enough, he forced his own escape to go back to you. Even if he left a trail that could lead back to him...

But that didn't matter to him right now. What mattered right now most to him was you. Though he was panicking, because he knew too much time passed. You must of been cold, alone, starving, thirsty...

He halted in front of the door to the room where he left you before opening it. A strong odor hit him hard...He knew that smell...The stench of death...

His heart was beating hard, and his breathing was heavy now as he slowly opened the door. Just to see your lifeless body laying there before him...

He saw the claw marks on the door, the dry blood around...The way you clearly fought to get free, to leave the room, to survive...But it was all pointless, because there was no escape unless given from the outside. Ren made sure of that...

He knelt down to pull you in close and cradle you in his arms. Looking down at your lifeless form, feeling your cold stiff body, yet touched and caressed your face. As if you were living, or would wake up from his touch...

Until you didn't, then the reality started to hit him hard. He begun to sob apologies while begging for you to wake up.

"A-angel?...P-please wake up. I'm sorry I left you. I--I won't do it again. I swear. P-please...I'll do anything for you...ANYTHING...I...I love you...Please don't leave me..."

"Sleeping Beauty"

When it comes to sleeping pills. They can be as dangerous as any drug taken if abused or taken too much by accident. Or if you have any health conditions.

Sol however didn't take that into mind when it came to you after the first few attempts of his plan succeeded.

It went on like every night, you drank your juice laced with sleeping pills he put into it. You got sleepy and went to bed, then he'll visit you and admire and worship your beauty...

However this night, he noticed something different...

When he reached out to touch you, you weren't as warm as usual...If anything, your body felt cold, stiff...He then grabbed your arm and lifted it up and it fell as before, but you didn't react with a mumble or breath like before...

Then he realized, you weren't breathing.

Panic started to kick in as he ripped your covers off and checked for your pulse. Nothing...He felt his heart racing and breathing unsteady and quicken as he tried to shake you awake. Nothing...

"Oh god no...No no no. Pumpkin? Pumpkin! Wake up! Fuck! Please wake up!" He was pacing around the room now, his hands running through his hair, gripping and lightly pulling at it in a panic.

Then he pulled out his phone. He panicked, called for Hyugo first for help, but Hyugo told him to hang up and call for a ambulance after he heard what was going on.

Sol did as he was told, but he was a mess on the line as he described what was going on. What was wrong with you...They told him to try to perform CPR on you...He did but now he was sobbing as he tried to save you, revive you. But nothing was changing. You weren't waking up.

Soon after help arrived, and they tried to save you but it was too late...Cause of death, heart failure. As to why, a autopsy will show in time. But Sol knew why, he knew what caused it...Then it'll surely lead all back to him. He was certain of it.

"It was my fault..." Sol muttered out to Hyugo when his friend arrived to comfort him. When Hyugo asked what he meant, to explained. Sol just grew quiet...

After your funeral, Sol downed a whole bottle of sleeping pills that night and let himself fall into a deep never ending sleep while holding a picture of you. "I'll be with you again soon, Pumpkin...I'm sorry...I love you..." His body was found the next morning in the cemetery you were buried at, lying lifeless next to your grave...

[sports-on-sundays]

boulevard of broken dreams / LN4 / Part 2

Summary: After meeting a savior, there's still a lot of mess to clean up.

Warnings: drunk, partying, stranger touching reader, use of the nickname 'Lan' for Lando because I think it's cute ok?!, hangover

Requested?: Yes. Thank you for the suggestion, @rorabelle15

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who enjoyed part 1! Here's a part 2, if you're interested. And if after that you're interested, I'd be willing to write a part 3, in which things kind of get bad again, but of course with a happy ending. Here's the link to part 1:

Sometimes, the sunshine that appeared, found you, and is helping you pick up all your pieces, leaves.

Sometimes you stumble back to where you were.

And the guilt is worse, because you know your sunshine wouldn't ever want you to go back there again.

Your head is thumping in sync with the beat to the party music. There's a bit of wine dribbled down your collar, but you don't remember how it got there, and frankly, you couldn't care less. All that matters is swaying to the music, letting go of everything, and having the night of your life, that won't feel so fun when you wake up with a hangover and a guilty conscience in the morning.

There's a man with tan skin, messy slicked back brown hair, and striking eyes, and he's got his hands all over you. You feel a twinge of fear deep down, but you're sure to brush that off as quick as you can.

It's all good. We're just having fun.

His hands caress all over your body, and before you know it, his lips are leaving imprints on your neck that you'll definitely regret tomorrow when you're sober again.

But for now, you giggle and let him do what he wants with you.

And once he's finished with you, he leaves you and moves onto someone else.

And you flop on a stool at the counter. You dig into your Coach purse, fish out the final bit of your cash, and demand another drink. After receiving it, you chug it down, then stagger up to head back out on the dance floor.

But you bump into the last person you want to see here, right now.

Not because you don't like him. No. It's the exact opposite.

It's because you love him. And he loves you.

And Lando can't be seeing you here, like this.

Damn it.

You watch as Lando's eyes practically pop out of his head. He grips your arm, and pulls you away from the dance floor, against a wall. He stares at you, his mouth hanging open.

"Heeeyyyy... Lan... Lan..." you hiccup. "Why're you here?"

He shakes his head. There's that look in his eyes. He's disappointed.

In you.

His hand moves up, and brushes some strands of hair away from your face. "I was just going out for a drink with friends... How many have you had, Y/n...?"

You swallow. Everything's warped and weird. "I... I dunno. Why don't you... have a drink? Maybe we could dance together...?"

"Oh, Y/n, no. No, no. Not a chance. I'm bringing you home now."

You bite your lip, protesting, "No... Lando, I don't want to... I don't want to go home..."

But he pulls you to his side, and leads you to the door, through all the people. And there's not much you can do to resist his strong arm in your intoxicated state.

It feels like it's just you and him, and it feels terrible.

"I don't want to leave, Lando," you wail as he opens his car door.

"Well, that's a shame," Lando says through gritted teeth, "because we are going home."

And that's that. He drives you home, gripping the wheel all the way, and when you get home, he leads you to the bathroom. He wets a paper towel and begins wiping the smeared mascara and lipstick from your face. As he does this, you stare at his brown eyes. They look hard, and upset. Your eyebrows furrow, and some not-so-good emotions of concern and guilt flood you.

But then Lando sighs. His hand drags across your cheek, and he mutters, "You can shower tomorrow morning. You need to sleep. Stay here. I'll get you some clothes to sleep in, and then you should go to bed."

"Here?" you ask, looking up at Lando with googly eyes.

"Yes, here," he grunts. "You can sleep in my bed. But I don't feel like sleeping with you; I'll sleep on the couch."

Before you can respond, he walks out of the room to fetch you a change of clothes. When he comes back, he tosses the clothes to you, shuts the bathroom door behind himself, and you change into a light pink t-shirt and blue plaid pajama pants. They're a little big on you, so you tie the drawstrings tight and stumble out of the bathroom, calling, "Uh, Lan?"

Just like that, he's there. He grabs your wrist gently and brings you to his bedroom. You climb into his bed slowly, and he pulls the blanket up to your chin for you. He smooths it out, before walking across the room to the door. He flicks the light off, so you can only see his silhouette in the doorway as he murmurs with an exhausted sigh, "Good night, Y/n."

You watch as the door begins to shut.

A little fire goes up within you, and you say, "Wait, Lando."

The door stops moving. It slowly creaks open again. You stare at his dark figure, hesitate, and then stumble out, "I... Thank you, Lan. I... I love you. You're my sunshine."

Lando takes a few steps closer, so you can see him a little better. "Did you say I'm your sunshine?" he asks gently.

You nod slowly, looking up at him. You hold your hand out to him. He steps closer, and he takes it in his. Your hand is a little shaky, but Lando's grip is firm.

"I'm sorry," you whisper.

He squeezes your hand. "It's okay," he whispers. His thumb runs over the back of your hand. "I forgive you, Y/n. And I love you, too."

You nod.

He gives your hand another squeeze before letting it go, gently. He softly removes some hair on your forehead, before muttering, "Good night, Y/n." He walks to the door, watches you for a few moments, and finally the door slowly creaks closed again, with a soft click.

"Good night, Lan."

In the morning, you lay in Lando's bed for a while, awake, just staring up at the ceiling, tears slowly and silently falling from your eyes.

Finally, though, you slip out of the bed, wipe your cheeks, and pad over to the door, feeling like there's an extreme weight on your skull, causing it to pulse. You slowly pull the door open, peek into the hall, and call, "Lan- Lando?"

There's a few seconds of silence, before you hear his voice call, "Coming!" And soon enough, he's walking into the hallway, and towards you. He's wearing a hoodie, grey sweatpants, and a necklace around his neck.

It's clear he's already showered and gotten ready, which prompts you to ask nervously, "What time is it?"

Lando hesitates, before saying, "10:30 A.M." When he sees the distress in your eyes, he quickly adds, "Hey, but don't worry. You needed that sleep."

"Don't you have plans today? I'm sorry if I'm keeping you from your plans-"

"Shush. No, I don't have any plans. Don't worry. Now, would you like to take a bath?"

You hesitate, but then nod. Lando nods as well and says, "I'll fill up the bathtub for you."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure," he responds in a level tone. "Go undress in my room. There's a clean towel draped over my chair you can use."

"O- Okay..." you respond, before going to do just that.

In the mirror in his room, you look at yourself. You look at the marks that stranger left on your neck last night. You sigh, dismayed, and feel anger rise up within you as you touch them gently with your fingers, despite knowing it is completely your fault for putting yourself in such situations.

So you wrap yourself in the towel and walk back to the bathroom. It smells like sweet vanilla, and the tub is full and bubbly. You wonder where the scent came from, but don't ask. Lando stands up from the side of the tub and says, quickly leaving, "I'll leave you to it. Call if you need anything."

So you step into the warm water, let yourself sink into it, and relax. The warmth and the scent seems to calm your deepening guilt and slow down your rushing thoughts.

You sigh, contented.

When you finish, you begin draining the tub, before wrapping yourself in the towel again and calling, "Lando?"

"Yeah?" you hear his voice ask back from the other room.

"Uh- What clothes can I wear...?"

"Oh, sh*t," you hear him say to himself, before saying, "Sorry, I forgot! I'll get you a change."

You wait, and soon there's a knock on the door. You open it a crack for him to hand clothes to you through the door, which consist of a loose long sleeve black shirt, fuzzy socks, and comfy sweatpants. When you exit the bathroom and enter the living room, your hair wrapped up in the towel, Lando looks up from his phone and softly smiles, "You look nice and comfy," he comments.

"Thanks," you smile weakly.

He pats the spot next to him, slipping his phone in the pocket of his black hoodie. "Come on. Why don't you sit down next to me?"

You nod and walk over, doing just that. Lando wraps his arm around you. You swallow, feeling a little awkward, and mutter, "That bath- it was really nice and relaxing. Made me feel a lot better."

"Good," he smiles, pleased with this information. There's a few seconds of silence, before he says hesitantly, gently rubbing your shoulder, "Well, what happened? Why did you do it?"

You swallow. "I don't know, Lando... I guess I just... When you're gone at races or back at your home in Monaco... I miss you... a lot..."

His hand freezes on your shoulder. "That's why? Because you missed me?"

"Yeah, well, pretty much. And when you're here, I'm happy. But when you're not, all the stress comes back... I'm sorry, Lando... I'm sorry I'm so clingy... I just... I'm sorry I annoy you... I don't know why you haven't given up on me yet, like everyone else..."

"Hey, stop that," he says firmly, grabbing your hand. "Haven't I already forgiven you? And the only time I get annoyed at you is when you hurt yourself. Because I love you. You're so important to me. I don't want to see you in pain. But I'll never, ever give up on you. It takes patience, Y/n... You just need time to heal, and that's why I'm here to help you with that."

You sigh and nod slowly.

He sighs as well and says, "I wish there was some way to always have you by my side..."

"Lando, I feel so needy..." you confess softly.

But he responds earnestly, "But that's okay. It's okay to need other people. It's been months since we met, and we're becoming better and better friends. To the point where I do love you. But Y/n, this isn't a one-way street."

"What do you mean?" you ask, looking up, meeting his eyes.

"I think sometimes I need you, too. You don't try, but you're like a refuge to me. You get my mind off all my stress, too. I like spending time with you, and you always listen to whatever I need to say."

Your eyes begin to water slightly. "Really?"

"Of course!" he nods earnestly.

You stare, and sniff. You wipe your eyes before leaning in and hugging him. He hugs you back as you say, "Thank you, Lando... That's the nicest thing anybody has said to me in years... You're so special to me."

He grins. "You're even special-er to me!"

You smile softly through your tears and whisper, "You're my sunshine."

He grins even wider, and leans away to wipe your tears. "Do you know, I love that nickname? Well maybe you're my lovely moonlight."

To you and your dark world, sunshine is all you need. You don't understand how sunshine would need moonlight. How does that even work?

But you trust your sunshine. So if he said it, it must be.

Lando gives you a few months, and you're getting better. Things are getting better. And your relationship is getting...

Very close.

One day, you're sitting together, snuggled on the coach, each respectively doing important things on your phones, when Lando suddenly sets down his and says, "I've got a few important things to talk about with you."

Your eyebrows immediately crease together, and a pit threatens to form in your stomach. "Oh no."

But Lando grins. "Jesus, don't look so worried! It's nothing bad."

"You said it like you were about to tell me you're moving across the world and I'm never going to see you again or something!" you half-heartedly complain.

But Lando smiles, amused at this, and ruffles your hair, "Do you worry I would ever do that?"

"I don't know... Maybe..."

He shakes his head. "You worry about too many silly things. No. The first thing I want to talk about with you is your job."

You blink in surprise. "Why my job?"

"Because you hate it, and it one of the things that makes you most miserable, and I hate it when you're even the slightest bit not happy." Your heart warms at this from Lando as he continues, "So, I think you ought to quit your job."

But you snort ruefully. "Oh, yeah, and then what? Go and become a race car driver? You've only taken me karting once."

"No..." he trails off, seeming to know what he wants to say, but unsure of how to say it. Finally he sighs and says, "I make a lot. If you came and lived with me..."

Your eyes pop out of your head. "You mean your smaller place here in the U.K., right?"

He hesitates, before a sheepish smile appears on his face. "No, I mean Monaco."

"How the hell am I going to repay you?!"

"That's the point. Your happiness, and getting to be with me all the time, is the payment. I get you, you get my house and food for free, without having to work."

"You're insane!" you gasp, covering your mouth at how ridiculously dead serious he really is about this.

But he grins. "I know. So, will you do it or not, missy?"

"Oh, Lando, shut up!" you laugh.

"Well?"

You smile falteringly and respond, "I'll think on that."

You stand in Lando's flat. You only had a few things to bring with you, and you're already all unpacked, and feeling a bad, unsure, nervous feeling within you. Lando's hand from behind plants itself on your shoulder, and as soon as you feel this touch from him, you turn and hug him. He seems surprised, but hugs you back. You sigh. "I just don't know about this, Lando."

"Hey, you're still worrying about it? Come on. It will be an adventure, living someplace new. And you don't have to worry about anything. Because you know I'll take care of you..."

"I still feel bad..."

"Don't. This isn't a hard thing for me. I want this. And I can take care of you. I want you to be happy. Find your thing, you know? And I know you will. I know you're not a lazy person- how hard you've worked for so long is proof of that. And I know you've felt trapped for so many years. Now I'm giving you the opportunity to branch out. See and try new things! Make the most of life! It's an adventure, after all. Maybe the opportunity of the dreams you had as a kid are past, but there's still a lot you can do. You're not even twenty-five yet. Come on. Brighten up. Just think of all the dreams you still can fulfill."

It's your first Grand Prix, in Silverstone. Lando has already shown you around, but you've been keeping close by his side the whole time, since the crowds are a little hard for you. But you love them. You love the luxurious, intense, rich atmosphere.

You even got to meet some of the other drivers on the grid.

But now you sit in the McLaren garage, by yourself, since Lando had to go off to do something. You tap your foot, nervous, feeling like you're just about going insane if you have to sit here a second longer, when suddenly you feel a presence in front of you and look up to see Oscar Piastri.

"Hey," he smiles. "So, are you Lando's girlfriend, or...?"

You immediately feel yourself heat up at this, and at first, you hesitate, not knowing the correct answer, before you blurt, "Oh, no, of course not! We're, uh, roommates."

Oscar nods at this, a smile coming on his face. "Oh, alright," is the response with slight doubt, before he adds awkwardly, "Well, enjoy the race..." and walks off.

And you do enjoy the race.

But after the race, it's all kind of a whirlwind. People are everywhere, and it's busy, and everyone is determined to do or go to one thing or place or another, and you're kind of just caught up in it.

So in the end, you're disappointed that you don't get to see Lando standing on the podium.

You sit in the garage, staring down at your feet, kind of in a daze, when suddenly the familiar sunny voice exclaims, "Y/n!"

Your head snaps up, and you stand up. Just seeing Lando's shining, bright grin is enough to melt your sadness away. He steps toward you. You open your mouth to speak, but suddenly-

You can't.

Because your sunshine's warm, soft lips are on yours. And his gentle hands wrap around your waist, hugging it. He pulls your frozen, confused, shocked self closer to himself. He leans down, and you lean up, connected.

Within seconds, he pulls away, looking down at you. Your head and heart are pounding. You're sweating. Lando's eyes are shining as a mutters, "This was the perfect race for you to come to."

"Lando..." you gasp. "What was that?"

"A kiss, darling. Because I love you," He gently touches his nose to yours. "And I think it is about time we take this to the next level."

"Oh- Oh..."

"Are you okay with that?"

You hesitate, but then nod. "Y- Yeah... You're everything I've... ever wanted... But... why me?"

"What do you mean, 'why me?' You're still thinking in those terms?" Suddenly he cups your cheeks in his hands. "I'll tell you why. You think I'm your savior, and you think you need me. You've told me you need me. You just told me I'm everything you've ever wanted. But don't you understand, that this goes both ways? I need you. You're everything I've ever wanted, and that's just you being you."

You stare up at him, awestruck, in wonder.

And he pulls you into a tight, sweet, warm embrace. He rubs your back and whispers in your ear, "Okay, cutie?"

You nod, and feel a real, lovely, warm smile creep up on you. "As long as you never stop being my sunshine."

[undertale-writing-times]

uhhh-

the bad sanses with a s/o (or friend- either one is fine :P) with ADHD, if that's alright? and let's just say that it's kinda acting up? i dunno how to describe it exactly, but i can definitely tell when a day is worse than it usually is.

i don't even know what type i have- i just know that sometimes, energy is there, and sometimes, energy isn't. sometimes i can't sit still, and sometimes i can. sometimes i clap or talk because "haha energy fun :D" and sometimes i just stare into space, so if that helps to write it out, then yay!

also i really like your writing. i enjoy reading it a lot. *casually gives love and hides in a hole*

I made it so it didn't really matter if they were a friend or a datemate :)

Nightmare: He understands. Sometimes he thinks that Killer has that but he doesn't quite know, and doesn't want to be the one to suggest it. If there is anything he could do to help you, he will. Sometimes he'll give you his books and ask you to put them away when he knows that you have energy, and if you don't have the energy to do anything, he won't force you to try anything. Now if there is a time where you need to sit still and you can't, he will lose his temper a little but he'll normally just give you something to mess with so he can focus.

Killer: He too has a lot of energy most of the time that he can't get out. He'll share his figet toys with you and if he can, he'll take you out places to run around with him to get out your energy. If Axe is around, he likes to call that your cat time, as a joke. Other than that, he really doesn't bring it up or really does anything about it. If you don't have the energy to do things, he'll either lay on top of you, or go off to do other stuff and check on you every once in a while.

Dusty: Sometimes when you have too much energy and keep messing with him or his things it annoys him, but he normally tries his best to not lash out at you. Sometimes he will, then feels bad, and he'll always try to make it up to you. He thinks that you're a little like Papyrus when you have so much energy, and that makes him happy, then sad, and he tries to not think too much about that. If you're staring off into space for too long he would check on you cause he's worried. If there is anything he can do to help you during those time he will, if not, he'll just keep you company.

Axe: He really doesn't mind. He knows that he wouldn't be able to keep up with you if you were running around. He can run fast too, of course he can, but he normally tries not to if he isn't hunting or chasing people… he's more of a powerhouse of damage rather than a speedy one, though he is faster than most people expect! He lets you run around and will check up on you if you're having a slow quiet day, will make sure you eat too.

[hislittleraincloud]

In regards to the “Holy Post” by Mrs. Ortega: if guilt is the driving factor then she may have done it to get Jenna to spend the Holiday’s with her family…whomp whomp whomp, girlie is rocking out at the Charlie XcX concert on turkey day. So much for her dubious social media practices.

You appear to be correct, if this video was taken today as labeled by its OP.

It's probably going to be a long time, if ever, Mama O there realizes that there's no escaping the ramifications of the two completely different worlds of being a non-celebrity and being a mega-star like her kid. She admittedly heard the warnings and had a vague idea of what kind of world that was, yet still highlights her probably inconvenient to all other kids sacrifices that she made to allow the loudest little kid to get their way. But, on the other hand, the truth is, is that (no matter what her motivations were then or now) she did make those sacrifices driving hours upon hours to auditions, choosing to make Jenna happy. So maybe the "family" holidays means a lot to Natalie and Edward. I'm not going to shit on them for that, because I've lived long enough to see other younger people steeped in regret about what they took for granted when they were younger. Ha ha, look at me, straddling a fence that no one wants to admit is there, i.e. looking at both sides a little more objectively without my own disdain for religion/culture of the religious coming through. Just bc I understand something doesn't mean I like it, and once again on this issue, my sympathy for either is thin. Nonetheless, Catholic Guilt goes both ways, it's still a thing that sticks in the back of one's mind, and sometimes avoidance/shutting down or off or going to a concert is a way of dealing with whatever guilt she does feel. And make no mistake about it, she does. Or hey, maybe some day we'll find out that it was all lies and Jenna was pushed into it so her TV 💰 could help alleviate their costs. Who the fuck knows. None of us really do.

So can we now take everything this unserious girl says with a grain of salt? I feel like we won't know a damn real thing about how she thinks now post-COVID, post-Wednesday fame until she writes another memoir...and even then I dunno if I'd take that more seriously than anything I've heard so far. I'd rather watch her sister yap for the 50th time about her damn foot surgery because at least we can trust in its relative truth.

[gren-arlio]

Yeah, I'm still doing this. Shocking, I know. Welcome to Season 2 of Episode 3 of Waku Puyo Translations.

(...I can't explain what happened here today.)

Hey, Gren here. It's been a bit and I took a break for Christmas and New Years to spend time with family...and as of currently writing this, it's snowing outside. But during that time, a teaser was thrown out for an actual translation team working on Waku Puyo Dungeon. Shocking, IK.

This is also late because imma be real with you...I didn't save this once and the entire thing was gone. Pain.

I'm happy about this, genuinely am, but it also sorta left me in a...moral dilemma. I'm glad it's being worked on, but should I even continue, despite it not going to be as good as the actual works? It's probably just a iffy feeling I'll experience for a week or two, but eh, we'll see.

With that, here's the video I'll be translating.

Timestamps:

Intro: (0:18)

Suke Boss (2:19, defeat at 4:25.)

Serilly Boss: (5:25, defeat at 9:00)

Apologies if this isn't up to par. Enjoy.

Intro: (0:18)

Scaly Lady: (Mermaid Girl/Woman/Lady also work here honestly.

Kyaaa~

Arle:

Woah there! What's the matter with you?

Scaly Lady:

You're here to bully me, aren't you? Please, please don't bully me...

Please - Don't - Do - It ~ (...Whar)

Arle:

Err...

Scaly Lady:

Everyone always bullies me since I look like some sort of fish...

Arle:

(I really dunno what to say here, maybe we should head back...)

[Somehow Suke enters the scene]

Suketoudara:

Whew! Hey, I'm right here you know!

Scaly Lady:

Eek! You're here to bully me too!

Suketoudara:

What- no! That ain't it at all! I'm Suketoudara!

Scaly Lady:

... ... ...

Arle:

Umm... I don't think she really knows you, ya know?

Suke:

Gaah! (Appropriate response.)

Scaly Lady:

Ah...

Suketoudara:

That's awful, Serilly!

Arle:

(Aha, so her name's Serilly...)

Serilly:

Wait, hold on! How do you know my name? (I assume it's to Suke.)

Arle:

Eh? They both went in...

There's no one here now. Maybe I can enter too?

Carbuncle:

Gu!

------

Suke Boss: (2:19)

Arle:

Wait, you're-

Suketoudara:

Wait, you're...that gal from the entrance!

Arle:

Yeah, I'm Arle. Nice to meet ya.

Suke:

And I'm Suketoudara! (He starts to dance, and honestly? It's either Sha or Cha IMO for Onomatopoeias.)

Arle:

W-Wha? What's with the dancing? It's so odd, please stop!

Suke:

Hey, what the!? You insulted my dancing!

I won't forgive anyone who does that!

Arle:

I'm being honest though! Look, if you really wanted a fight, you could've asked for one!

----

Suke Defeat: (4:25)

Suketoudara:

Oh no, Serilly will forget about me now...

It's just not my day today! Feeesh! (...I hate translating this guy.)

Arle:

I told you to stop with that odd dance!

Suke:

It's like no one here understands my sadness...

Arle:

(...Nothing I do seems to help.

There's plenty of people[?] who won't listen to others...it's an issue.)

Suketoudara:

Serilly...you're so kind, yet you forgot about me...

Arle:

...I don't really get it but alright.

Carbuncle:

Gugu?

-----

Serilly Boss: (5:25)

Serilly:

Even all the way here...you still want to bully me?

Arle:

That's not it! I'm here to play and enjoy my day...

Serilly:

What in the world did I do?

Arle:

... ... ...

Serilly:

Please, just leave me alone!

Arle:

Hey! What did I do to you!?

Every time you interact with me or anyone else you tell them to go away, or they they'll bully you!

Serilly:

It's because it's true!

Arle:

You're driving me to my wits end! Are you going to fight or not?

Serilly:

Hey, even I get mad sometimes!

-----

Serilly Defeat: (9:00)

Suketoudara:

Hey, wait for me!

Arle:

Oh, you're...

Suketoudara:

I've had enough of this. Give her a minute.

She didn't mean any harm either. (...And then he Cha and Sha dances again..)

Serilly:

So, you're here to bully me also?

Suketoudara:

S-Serilly...you know that's not true...

Serilly:

You and everyone here, you're all here to bully me, aren't you!?

Arle:

What you're saying right now is worse than anything you've said so far!

I'm upset also, yet Suketoudara still wants to be your friend!

Serilly:

Wait...? My friend...?

Arle:

...if you keep pushing everyone away from you, then no one will want to become your friend!

Serilly:

... ... ...

Arle:

(Sounds like I was preaching. Are you going to cry from that?)

Serilly:

Um...do you hate me?

Arle:

Eh? No, not really, but...

Serilly:

Uh...I'm sorry...

[And she leaves.]

Suketoudara:

Hey, wait for me Serilly!

Arle:

Go after her! Be a good friend for her!

Suke:

Gya Gyaa! I'm out then!

[He leaves.]

Arle:

...She's a nice girl, but I feel like it'll be hard for you to be friends with her...

Carbuncle:

Gugu?

-----

And that is IT. Expect delays and sort now because school is getting significantly more challenging + midterms, but with that, that'll be all.

Adios.

[captain-kraken]

Writeblr Positivity Tag

Thank you for the tag @writernopal - see her post here

No pressure tag for: @sam-glade @lynnedwardswrites @aquadestinyswriting @elshells @blind-the-winds

Blank list of questions below the cut!

-

1. What motivates you to write?

Mostly because I enjoy it when I actually get writing done lol. I like having something that I've created that I can actually see, rather than it all just being in my head. Also, I always get an extra burst of motivation every time I get a comment on anything.

2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

A snippet from one of my poems that I really like, I dunno why, I don't think it's the best I've done but I just like it:

The past never leaves, The hunt never ends. It doesn’t matter if I break, Because the path always bends.

3. Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

Definitely Pocha. Not only is he one of the most interesting ones, but he's one of the few characters I have that genuinely enjoys life and has an apprecitation for things that I sometimes don't think about.

4. What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

Honestly, I enjoy the prep the most lol. I love building all my notes, my spreadsheets, and organising it all.

5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

I'm not sure actual writing-wise, since I've never really had any feedback about that kind of thing. I like to think I'm pretty good at worldbuilding though.

6. What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

The interactions <3 every tag, ask, comment, makes me so happy.

7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

To be honest, all of my writing is done on Microsoft Word. I've used it for writing for the last 19 years, I don't think I'll be changing it any time soon lol

8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

OOF this one is tough because I love it all so much. I'm gonna cheat this and say the heiros system since that it basically the heart of all of my worldbuilding for Sonhara.

9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

Whenever I get to a really rough patch where words just won't come at all, I work on something else creative that's still related to the WIP. Cook/bake something that your character eats, try and cosplay as them using things you already own, try a craft project! It helps me anyway lol

10. Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters

@writernopal @sam-glade @elshells @blind-the-winds who reblog a lot of my things and make me feel even more hyped about my own OCs <3

1. What motivates you to write?

2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

3. Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

4. What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

6. What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

10. Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters

[whoseafraidofliloleme]

I CAUGHT UP!!!!

first off, as always, LOVING the sibling dynamic!!! each of them have their own colour and i love seeing them interact <3 and how they baby our dear yn too of course

moving on to the matter at hand, the guy on everyone's minds (derogative): hyunjin. i... rlly don't know how to feel abt him??? like he clearly has red flags but i feel like he might pull through in the end and stop being so toxic. i wonder if there's actually smth behind his behavior, or if it's just plain jealousy. tbh i think i'm just too much like our dear yn and i'm giving him the benefit of the doubt, but i don't wanna jump completely on the hate train. rn i'm waiting at the station and i might get in when it comes 😚

then the man on everyone's minds (affectionate): jungwonnie!!!! nothing to say besides that i love him <3 it's so refreshing seeing him be so kind and understanding and having proper communication from the beginning, we love to see it! and the park siblings already love him, as they should

i gotta hurry bc i'm gonna go eat so. question time!!! is this smau gonna be around the same lengths your other smaus are? are you planning on expanding more on yn's backstory? (please say yes) AND MORE IMPORTANTLY: why buttercup? is it because she's tough and never doubts, unlike yn???? or just bc she liked her colors the best??????? why did yn want to grow up to be her?????????

have a nice day and i hope something good happens to you tomorrow! you're gonna find a pc on pristine condition lying on the ground i just know it!!

By saying you loved it, I'll add you to the tag list 😊. Now you won't miss an update and I get a lovely reblog with your reaction in the tags, which I love btw they crack me up every time. Moving on...

I'm just happy that people love the sibling dynamic, writing siblings is always tricky cause I don't have any so it's not from experience just what I've seen and read but I'm glad that all the Park Siblings seem like distinct characters.

If there are siblings that play a major role, 100% YN is gonna be the maknae 😂. Then again I might just challenge myself to make one of my YNs be the eldest or the middle child...

Hmm I dunno where his story line will take us atm. There's definitely a backstory there and it's coming in future chapters but at this point in time it's up in the air if Hyunjin will be recieving a redemption arc or not 😂.

Ngl this might be my favourite Jungwon cause he's just such a sweetheart and he's been like that since the beginning 🥹🥹🥹. I just love him so much and I'm so happy that everyone loves him too, TSIT Jungwon deserves all the love.

So my last 2 smaus that ended, Long Story Short PSH and A Diamonds Gotta Shine LHS are on the shorter end.

However, I hate short smaus myself so this one will probably be 30 chaps, maybe longer if I feel like I can add more drama and angst 😂. Or even fluff, really it depends on my mood.

YNs backstory, I'm not sure if it'll be explained more in future chapters or not but so you know I'll outline it here:

Parknae was kidnapped as a baby by a couple who had just gone through a miscarriage. They saw a young baby unattended by nurses and kidnapped her from the hospital.

Parknae being kidnapped was big news and they saw on the news but seeing that the Parks were rich and there were already 5 older siblings they ran away with Parknae thinking the Parks will get over it eventually.

They did care and love her for the first decade of her life, they treated her as their own child. Unfortunately the Park family never recovered from losing a child.

Their parents went through depression, blamed themselves for losing their youngest child and did everything they could to find her again. The remaining Park siblings, felt the pain of a lost little sister and did all the could to help find their youngest sister.

Despite the loss of Parknae. The parents didn't forget that they had 5 other children, they still loved and cared for them as they did before but there was always something missing. The whole family felt that missing piece.

Sadly a year before Parknae was reunited with her family, the parents were in a car accident and they died, coincidentally they were on their way to see a Private Investigator who they had hired to find Parknae...

Subsequently Parknae never got to actually meet her biological parents, she only knows them through pictures, videos and stories.

I hope that answers the questions on Parknaes backstory.

Buttercup because she's what YN strives to be and also YN just loves that Jungwon took this random bit of info and made it into a nickname for her.

This turned out to be a hella long ask 😂. Go eat something and I hope you have a good day too!!. I do still recommend you read Peace a Jay Harry Potter meets Gossip Girl smau, but that's just me wanting to see you reaction to that smau 😂.

Have a good day! Stay hydrated and happy!!.

[emberlynnrayne]

8-12-24

I'm trying to take better care of myself.

I'm not doing a great job, but I'm getting better.

Started with my new therapist today, and I'm optimistic.

Start my new job tomorrow, and I am nervous, but confident. I am good at what I do, just hoping I mesh well with the family.

One month till move out. Gotta get packing.

Been thinking a lot about Hali lately. I've come to realize I wouldn't let her back in now, if she tried. Our friendship falling apart has weighed heavy on me, but I think I'm making peace with it. The further into my recovery I get, the clearer I see my past relationships for what they were. We weren't all bad, but she was stuck in unhealthy patterns that only got more severe with time.

I dunno. Now shes made another series of impulsive decisions and isn't happy with where it got her. And she's stuck there now.

I won't make the same mistake twice. There will not be another Hali, another Jill, another Justin, Jason, or Alex. My standards are set and I'm no longer giving passes to patterns.

Patterns.

I'm watching everyone all the time. Watching myself. Watching for patterns and

...

And ready to run.

Fuck. Is that still where my head is at? That I have to be ready to run at the drop of a hat? Why am I surprised by that? I've recognized it in different terms- the fear that everything could crumble at any moment, for example. But running. Am I escaping or staying on my feet? In fear, or hitting the ground running again? Does it matter?

Where is my faith?

Ha.

I'm held together by pure stubborn force of will. I will not stop. Ever. If my heart is dead my body will keep going through the motions until it beats again. I will not stop. That is where my faith is.

There is a fire in me that just won't die. I've always had this certainty that I was here for a reason, and that I would find and live a happy life if I just did my best. So I am. Always. Trying.

But I am watching for patterns in the people around me. Skittish of danger like a bunny in the meadow. Ready to start back into my hole at the first movement of shadow.

I am so tired of hurting. I understand why I'm not in a hurry to invite that potential again.

I literally cried, utterly bawling the other night. It was a moment of realizing how deeply I loved my partner, and how profoundly terrifying it is. They're so deep in my heart. The hurt they could cause is just... Blinding.

I feel so guilty sometimes. It's not that I don't trust partner. It's not that I think they'd be malicious. It's not about them. This fear is seeping from my scars.

I won't let the FOG control my life anymore. I live through my fears and love through the scars. As much as I can.

Ugh. My brain goes in circles. Always searching for my flaws and mistakes. Always on the lookout for danger. So afraid of myself and every damn one else.

My therapy homework was to write 5 of my own daily affirmations.

1. I deserve grace.

2. I am good.

3. I am capable.

4. I am likable.

5. I

These feel not good enough, but I am tired.

Goodnight.

[ancient-reverie]

s/o to my fellow systems whose brains are just wild and will see a nice rock and make an alter. like okay brain, that's nice thank you. no idea what started us as a system, but over the years we've had many new people form and the causes are varied. this is not a full list, just a couple of experiences

i want to preface that there is nearly no way to "prove" if these are true reasons or not as is the nature of dissociation. but they FEEL right and it's our brain so we would have some idea. and it Doesn't Really Matter in the end being as what matters is that we Are Here Now.

really we made this as a list so maybe someone who needed to could relate to or laugh at one or more of the things

a lot of feelings about not being able to sing gave us a vocaloid with a broken voice

almost drowning landed us a transmasc siren

started writing a new character and oops hi pretty okay and strong girl

"i need a big brother"

some really bad shit went down in mindspace (this happened often when we were younger) and an alter or two were traumatized so write a note to wait two months and start looking for a new one but still be surprised and confused when the new one comes up anyway

some symptom got too much to handle so now it's this guys turn wait who is this guy

discovered a new song and listened to it on repeat and maladaptive daydreamed someone a new friend or child

bestie said we weren't friends no more so i'm gonna become someone who has never met bestie

We Aren't Talking About The YouTuber That We Watched Too Much Of And Used For Emotional Support Until They Showed Up And We Pulled Off A Perfect [redacted] Accent And Refuse To Speak Of Since (sorry)

uncomfortable moment you will only ever be Confused about despite being able to remember it and what was happening

every alter rotating out during the Suicidal TimesTM until there's no one else who can handle it so yOu MakE ONe and they're actually really happy for a minute and can appear to break the depressive session but very quickly realizes what they're in for and joins the rest of the Sad Club, thanks for the help buddy, sorry and welcome to the club we have weed

Bird Hyperfixation

"i need a new mom"

Vampire hyperfixation

literally just a different version of an existing alter. alternate-timeline 'if this had happened or hadn't happened' or future/older selves

you really liked this character in that show but your brain for some reason won't take the actual character. oh no it has to make its own person that is an exact mirror of that character! but it wont tell you! you have to forget all about that character until 10 years later when the alter realizes it but they're so different now you don't actually know but it probably shaped you in some way

had a slut phase on discord and the fake personality 2 of the alters used online turned into her own person

You haven't met the alter that you know exists because you asked for them to exist at the same time you heard your father cry for the first time at 27 when you all Lost a creature who the whole system considered their daughter.

people just form when the brain decides it's a good idea for us. it's been awhile since we've had a new fully fleshed out alter who has the energy and desire to be out/slots into the main group that takes care of most things. when new ones form these days (like 2.3 every 4 years) it's "quieter" people that pop up, introduce themselves, and then chill in mindspace with the rest and we don't really hear from them much.

Last we counted we have about 50 people (we counted a long time ago i'll be honest), but on a daily basis only about 3-5 people are active and it's not always through the whole day. at least 2-3 are always active. Siruss is the only one who can solo we dunno why.

our usual routine someone will be out and they'll have a co-fronter and or a couple background buddy(ies), and then the co-fronter and background people change after a week to a month, it depends on who it is. sometimes one of the background or co-fronters will swap out and be the main one for however long they can manage (depends on who it is)

but if we're leaving the house and around other people the routine is totally subject to change.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary47

10/24-25/2023

tuesday-wednesday

didn't do a lot today.

because i vc'd with friends, which was nice, i got to talk to the new guy my friend added, he's awesome, i'm really glad to be around him and everyone else now. i'm talking so weird. basically i have a new friend who i'm going to be talking to, he said we should make music, i said, of course, of course.

that reminds me, i need to write a response to my friend's poetry thing since he passed it onto me.

okay done, that was fun. i'm awfully obsessed with the word "gigolette" because it means prostitute and also piece of meat. it's a very scary word, it's scary what the slang says, i guess, about how men see anyone like that but also it's something that makes me feel like i could curl up beneath it. it's funny how awful things work that way and i just want to repurpose them as self defense. like all i have is my latent, i dunno, whorishness, and feeling like a piece of meat all the time anyways, maybe that's like, an internal sexism thing. i dunno. if i were at this point of my life and not tethered to someone, i think i would have started doing very self destructive things with my sex life, instead i'm monogamous and safe/happy.

anyways i packed a little for tomorrow, or not a little, i think decently, some stuff might get thrown in tomorrow morning, i have to get my skincare stuff ready tomorrow too, otherwise, we should be chill. we meaning me. my gf is chill too i guess. i'm worried about being in a red state but most people don't really give a shit, right, about whatever i am (androgyne and hopefully pretty / hopelessly hopeful that i am pretty / wannabe / sometimes actually what i want to be), the fact i'm nothing definite might keep people away. mostly i'm scared of public restrooms but i'm likely going to have to. so whatever. i should just make peace with something bad maybe happening.

i am gonna bring my camera, to arizona, it might be fun for photos, and hopefully i'll remember to get them off my gf's comp if i bounce them onto therrrre.

anyways i offloaded the pics, some are of bruises, but some are of that imac, here's one that i think is fun/ny:

freakish riffs on this song, i really love the guitar on the right channel, but i guess i love it for how it plays off the left channel, which is also pretty strange. idk, i just love that, i'd like to get to this level some time. i think i made a sound kinda almost there, it's a bit more fucked up though, it's got these really short delays on it w/ constantly modulating times, all super short and it results in a sound that's too close to itself so it makes something kinda uggy (in the good way) and i want to keep messing with it. the constant feedback is cool too.

anyways i did all my working out today, too, sad i won't be able to do anything but the 60 squats while in arizona, but hopefully there'll be enough walking for that to not matter too much.

thinking about taking my psp for the car ride. it would be the first time i play a video game in a while. i had fun just loading it w/ a bunch of noisy faggy stuff i've been listening to (like the above song) lol.

i'm also now thinking if i should make my own psp theme. it seems like a fun way to spend a day. who knows, maybe i will. my psp is the cute sakura pink one.

the only game i have in here is persona 2, which i like decently. i should get farther into it. if i play it on the ride i will. also, i really wanna get a camera peripheral for my psp to do stuff w/ that, that seems like it could be really crazy for the stuff i'm looking to do.

anywayssssss, i need to sleep soon soooo:

byebye!!!!!!!!

[lyra-swan]

Hiiiii I know you're offline as I'm writing this but nevertheless I still felt like jumping into your inbox and word-vomiting for a second because I've been following Mechanical Angel for quite some time now and picked it up again recently and I just made it to part IV, god I'm having a blast. I can't wait to put all my full, extensive thoughts out there once I'm done but for now I need to stress that I'm just super impressed with both your writing style and the tone/ character development as a whole but the world-building in particular got to me gooood.

Am I right to assume that a lot of research went into this???? Because you can genuinely tell, to the point I literally felt transported to the places as you described them every time and the details are just so captivating to witness. It really feels like I'm reading a ww2 novel, I feel transported back into German literature class on occasion and it's just. Impressive???

Anyway thank you SO MUCH for putting this out there, I'm so happy Mechanical Angel (and all of your works) exist!! I've already noticed that there's another story focused on Natsume/Sora set in the same universe and I can't wait to finally jump into that one too once I'm done with MA. (Especially since Natsume is in my top 4# favorite characters but that's only a bonus)

Last but not least I am very mentally ill over Eimika now, congrats, I'm rotating them in my brain a very normal and totally not concerning amount, haha

May you have a wonderful day!!

Oh hi thank you so much!! I both loved and struggled with Part IV so much, but it was extremely fun to write, especially that dumb part in ch.38... I dunno if you've reached ch.45 but that was also very fun. I hope you continue to enjoy the rest!

I'm going to ramble like an old grandma again, adding a read more thingy so the post won't be a bother to scroll past for others.

In my opinion I don't think I've done enough research! But I'll always feel like that no matter how much I do so bleugh, nevermind. The scenery is typically based on my own surroundings but changed slightly to match an European feel... I think I wrote more in the last ask answer but it has a tiny bit of spoilers, I believe. The setting is a bit of amalgamation of my own country and europe because my own surroundings is what I'm familiar with, and of course although it's supposed to be inspiried by Germany everyone drives on the left side (I think I mentioned it in a chapter note) because I didn't want to accidentally trip over myself from a simple description of where a character turns their head. It's the Little Details that are important!

I say, as if I also didn't mess up a few details here and there because I started posting before finishing the first draft and so I couldn't edit the way I used to do for my previous longfics... But yes, it was very fun adding random bits from what I learned into the story because I used to love watching WW2 docs and laughing every time the nazis messed up and suffered a crippling defeat.

Like, I'd read about how they lied to their citizens that they were doing just dandy, and then have Wataru ask Eichi if he wanted more 'false reports of our so-called victories on the battlefield' to be published in the newspapers. Because that's the funniest shit ever to me...

Then one day I'd read about the nazis being among the first to connect smoking to bad health, and I'd add something like that in a conversation between Eichi and Tatsumi, they're not nazis obviously but because of the setting's inspirations that's where I got a lot of information (but you'll have a scene later on that's more Britain than Germany, so the fic truly is a amalgamation of different european settings during WW2). And of course, people are sceptical of new medical findings, that was mentioned. And the part where Eichi mentions 'common people are suspicious of IV drips' to Mika, that was a thing in the real world too.

I wonder if there is a single medical invention that wasn't regarded with suspicion by at least one person at first.

I kind of wish I had Eichi offering gold watches to anyone who quit smoking, it would've been funny, but eh.

And of course there are some things that don't make sense because this IS an alternate world so I DO have freedom. Like, even though this takes place generally in 1930s-1940s time, tranquiliser guns weren't invented until the 1950s (by a NEW ZEALANDER!!! Colin Murdoch. He's also the genius behind the modern day syringe, if I recall correctly), but you know, I added it in anyway because alternate world, alternate invention timeframes. I wrote that fog scene where Mika is shot by Midori while also sitting outside one dark foggy morning, and I liked the scene so much I kept it in.

Anyway I'm so happy you like the world-building! It was super fun to work on! I really like rural settings for world war stories... one of my favourite authors, Michael Morpurgo has that kind of vibe going on too, my bookshelf has a few of his books. So many dog and animal stories with themes of war lingering in the background if they don't directly deal with war and I love every one of them. They're all so full of emotion, they'd always make me cry. I love the stories that can make me cry and look back and think it was the most beautiful thing I've ever read and Morpurgo's works can do that A LOT. But also I'm very emotional...

And thank YOU for this! I'm always so happy hearing someone enjoyed what I wrote!

I still need to finish that natsusora fic. It was supposed to be a part of the main story itself but because it would've taken so many chapters, I was worried about 'forcing' readers through a side story that had no bearing on eimika. So I posted it as a separate fic! It takes place during that last chapter of Part IV so you can actually have a look whenever you've started Part V.

Natsume is very out of character, however. He's in his 30s and not really the cute feminine witchy boy that he truly is in canon (at least, that's how I see him), he's an engineer and really logical... but he hates Eichi with a passion, that's VERY necessary. Nevertheless, I try to write him as close to his canon self within the au that I've shoved him in and told him to survive in. Totally fine if you end up not liking it!

Excuse the rambling!! Thank you! You have good day!!

[healingheneree]

Last letter of 2022

Dear Tam,

Well it's been a while since i actually wrote. I think it's been a choice the past couple of weeks to avoid and to feel past it.  Knowing things are a choice is a bit different and a change but i think it's a start. In my head I had so much I wanted to say but now writing it and ready to put it on paper feels different. 

So the end of the year is here. The feelings i have for you and this family i currently accepted that it is me and it makes no sense but at the same time who the fuck cares as long as it makes sene to me and i am getting there but learning to be happy thats all that matters right now. I have this weird fuck it mentality that i think i abosorb from you sorta i dunno how tho. But we are going to dance the rest of our lives. One reason is we love these kids so much and we both know how much the mean to us and the relationship and dynamic of this family is will and always be my #1 priority. So what thes Plan B that the kids get the best of everything especially from us. I will get better at setting boundaries I will actually stay within. And we will have to compromise but  from a  place where we are both ready and can trust the intentions.  These past couple days have been interesting. I knew your trip was coming up and I know it's so easy to get emo and be in that place. But like it said its a choice.Those feelings are there and they do fucking suck. Like you I'm going to be with it and cry it out. And come back here and be present and know it's ok to drive and morn and still love and want PLanA but a new plan is here and we are committed. All in as always. No clue what the motto ended up being for this year for us lol.  I know its a long journey and its going to be hard but fuck we do the hard shit and it always pays off and we just have to have faith and hope and i do so its going to be a great new year. 

You have always and still will forever be my best friend. You just know me, know me and I know you know the flaws as I do, but you never really give up. For that i love you so much and as easy as it could be for me to not try. This will never be one of them. I am always going to try to be your friend and put in the work. But it won't work because it's just part of who I am.  I finally accepted that it's ok.  The reset button has been pressed. Saved points erased forever. Time to play again now with a lot more knowledge on how we want to spend the rest of our lives.The forever Journey lol. The game of Life.  I am very happy you are happy. But I am also sad. I feel less happier than you. A little bit of jealousy in there is an emotion that is new to me to sit through. One of the ones on the list that I def avoid feeling.  But I also know this part is out of my control. I am working on making the best of it as fast as possible. Wish you were home so we can play some overwatch. And kill people and enjoy the present. You have taught me so much over this past decade and I hope I have done the same for you. I know deep down we balance each other out in all ways The so called GOOD and the BAD. We make a great team but it's not an easy Dance. But i'm ready and excited to see what happens in season 5 of the Tam and Henry Show. haha every 2 years can be a season. Many people would love to watch us. But anyways there is a place where we are so comfortable with each other and that's our zone. We will get there where  it's within each other's boundaries.  

I cannot wait for stories about your journey bubs. 

Love always,

Henry

[stranger-awakening]

yo it’s been like a year and a half but I’m going to update iwlybn because I finally managed to finish the next chapter somehow

[anewp0tat0]

Kuroshitsuji Chapter 194

wow! I feel gross! and sad!

this chapter has left me quite perturbed, but for once it is not in reaction to Yana's humor or her decisions on portraying children. I think this is an appropriate and warranted reaction to seeing so many children being... what's worse? groomed, or harvested?

I do like seeing Finny get serious cause I just love seeing emotions, that's just me. but of course I'm still left very afraid if our local sun child is so on edge.

and the way that snake doesn't understand why Finny is so unnerved. hhhhhHHH this is gonna HURT ME.

and then of course there's the child exploitation. it appears to me that they're being trained to replace everyone in the phantomhive manor(more simular to the previous staff), for the most part.

I'm just gonna admit it though, I don't understand why they need... so many. do the souls/bodies need to be replaced regularly, and these are all back ups? I would understand that for the Ciel doubles, but what are the rest of them for. so many child servants??

the dark place my brain went to is that the undertaker basically plans to immortalize the phantomhive manor- or what it once was- by replacing everyone with these bodies and souls, from an orphanage that gives him a constant supply. my God. probably not the case eh?

and this hurts me too.

it seems that no matter what, Doll will always be stuck in the position of leading people to their doom(in the circus she was[allegedly, i forgot if she ever stopped hesitating] killing people on the side, and here she's raising these kids so that their souls can probably be replaced). it's just awful.

plus the way that she is taking charge here, almost undoubtedly aware of the deeper plan, that's just very grim. it seems that there won't be any happy ending for this character. it's a good think Yana sprinkles humor in there cause we need it.

also, about Finny and Snake recognizing everything. after seeing everyone in costume preparing for their future role play, it now makes most sense that these rooms were made to resemble the phantomhive manor. what I don't understand is... why don't finny and snake just say that, if that is indeed the reason why the rooms look familiar?

I mean for snake, sure, maybe it'll take him a moment. but the phantomhive manor was practically the only home Finny had, so I feel like if the rooms were so simular then Finny should pick up on that instantly: something like "this looks like the tea room from the manor...!!!" so why are we not already at this conclusion? is Yana writing Finny to be stupid so he doesn't connect the dots for the sake of suspense? does she think we're stupid and haven't already noticed the similarities? I doubt either is true. so maybe I'm just over thinking it, dunno

yea this may be the worst(affectionate, I do hope) mini arc yet 👁,👁,

especially since I'm pretty sure Snake is thinking that Doll doesn't know what Ciel knew, that the rest of the circus arc was kidnapping children, and that they left her to continue doing that. and he doesn't know how to tell her. probably.

either way, 3 way deception. nice :] we should start betting on who breaks the news first

[isagisyoichi]

YOU MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL!

SYNOPSIS: niko as your boyfriend

CHARACTERS INCLUDED: niko ikki aka my boyfriend hello

WARNINGS: swearing, pretend all the boys go to the same school and they're all friends for plot, normalize not writing serious boys as someone that practically hates their s/o and never opens up to them god bless, also no such thing as ooc since we dunno shit ab him so everything i say is law. SUPER LONG LOL, it's like 2k+ words 😭

A/N: i love my boyfriend and i'm v happy about all the attention he's getting (even if he will prob will b subbed out 👎) this was fun to write bc i think he would b very soft as bf and also i hate the notion that stoic and serious = boring and detached in a relationship. also first post w the new user yayyyy rip yoichisagis an end of an era for realsies.

FOR: fox anon my beloved this one is for u😩

it takes a while for you two to get together, just because niko wants to think things through and be sure he’s making the right decision, as well as him being naturally apprehensive about this whole dating thing.

when you do eventually start going out, keep in mind you're probably his first real anything, so-

niko needs to take it slow for the first month or so because he needs time to adjust and get used to being in a relationship.

when he gets comfortable around you, niko starts to talk a lot more.

niko starts to talk about his interests more-soccer, stem stuff (idc i'll die by my hc that he's a stem boy), etc. and niko's really happy that you're genuinely interested in what he has to say :)

and as your relationship progresses, niko becomes more inclined to share his inner thoughts.

“this song is so bad, i hate it and how it's everywhere,” like, babe that sucks, but what do you want me to do, take it off the radio myself? 😭

you find out that niko’s kind of a hater LOL, but it’s okay, because it means he can be himself around you <3 and the mini debates you have with each other are fun.

he’s someone you can take shopping with you if you need a solid second opinion.

“ikki, is this cute?” you niko as you adjust the shirt you tried on in the fitting room mirror.

“no.” he’s so straight up LOL. “the blue one from earlier was better.”

“this one?”

“yeah, that one. you look really pretty in it.”

ngl though, niko’s not much of a mall person. he'd just follow you around like a little puppy LOL, but he doesn't mind too much because it's for you.

communication is important to niko!!!!! he wants someone that he can have real conversation about the things that matter to him, so he rly makes an effort to have that kind of connection with you.

niko's naturally funny but he isn't aware that he is lol.

but when he does try, i feel like his humor comes in the form of sarcasm and dry wit. likes poking fun at you here and there with a lighthearted jab.

"you're so weird, y/n," is the most common one.

niko’s naturally closed off emotionally (male aquarius 😒) but i, personally, think he’d really try and push himself to be more open with you, especially if you expressed for him to do so </3

he'd be really appreciative of someone patient and understanding of the fact that he doesn't open up easily, though.

but eventually, you become the person closest to him- niko confides in you a lot, which he’s grateful for because he usually holds everything in.

not one for pda or other lovey-dovey things in public, other than the occasional holding of hands but behind closed doors, niko’s so soft around you, it’s like he’s a completely different person.

also, i feel like niko’s real handsy with you, i get the vibe he’s super touch starved 😭

although it does take him a while to get used to physical affection, once he has, niko cannot get enough. he’s always touching you when he has no real reason to.

(and because you're his first relationship, i feel like it’s just natural that niko’s going to be kind of clingy towards you.)

“you okay, ikki?” you ask as niko suddenly wraps his arms around your waist from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“mhm,” he mumbles. “just wanna be close to you.”

niko likes when you sit on his lap when he’s on his computer. you can have your arms wrapped around his neck, your head resting in the crook of his neck, or you could just be on your phone or whatever, it doesn’t matter, niko just likes you near him.

you guys don’t really talk to each other when you do this, aside from niko occasionally checking up on you and asking if you need anything from him.

but other than that, you guys just enjoy each other's touch in silence. it’s one of his favorite things to do with you.

however, if you start kissing him in the middle of whatever he’s doing and keep it up for long enough, niko will drop everything to make out with you right then and there (also one of his favorite things to do with you).

speaking of kissing- you kiss niko first.

niko would try to plan your guys first kiss out because he wants everything to be perfect.

but, he ends up taking forever to execute it because he keeps overthinking and you can only wait so long before kissing him, so you take matters into your own hands.

his kisses are sloppy and juvenile at the beginning, but he’s smart and learns quickly what you do and don’t like.

likes being kissed on his jaw and forehead the most :')

if the team ever happens to see niko kissing you, they're gonna be so annoying 😭

"yooo niko's making big moves ‼️" "my son's growing up on me!😩" "good job *pats on the back*" and niko is red all over as he drags you away from them, muttering about how childish and annoying they are 😭.

but, they're all very supportive of you guys, even if they're embarrassing as hell 🙄.

they even give niko relationship advice- which luckily, he doesn’t follow (most of the time), because, let’s be honest, if you're getting unsolicited dating tips from a bunch of teenage boys, it’s probably bad 😭.

you’re the only person niko shows his forehead to. just know that having the opportunity to see it means that niko trusts you more than anyone else :’)

repay his trust by kissing his forehead lovingly and showering him with compliments whenever you can !!!!!!!!!!

“y/n, why’re you so embarrassing,” niko says under his breath, blushing as you hold his face and litter soft kisses on his forehead, rambling about how cute he is.

always looks for you in the bleachers when he has a game and you’re always the first person he talks to after.

and the fact that you make an effort to come as often as you can means sooo much to him. definitely considers you to be his biggest fan.

real classy with nicknames- uses “my love/love,” and “darling,” the most.

his favorite petname from you is "pretty boy." gives him butterflies each time he hears it.

the first time you call him that, he's confused, but after you explain that being called pretty is basically the highest compliment a boy can receive, he gets all soft on you.

only uses instagram to like and comment on your pictures and that's it 😭.

comments stuff like “you're so pretty” and "beautiful," without any emojis because niko refuses to use them LOL.

remembers the compliments you give him! they help with his self esteem and i feel like he values your opinion a lot.

so, tell him all about how cute and smart and talented and hot and funny he is and how much you love him and he'll replay it in his head 24/7.

i think he prefers to be the big spoon, unless he's sad- then he really wants you to hold him.

niko gives me homebody vibes, so expect relaxed dates, but still nice, yk?

what i mean is niko's not gonna take you out to get gas station food and call it a day 😭 he's classier than that and he always puts in effort towards dates.

he always plans them ahead of time and takes into consideration what he thinks you'd enjoy. and he insists on paying 🤗.

but, niko always does something special for days like your birthday or an anniversary, like go somewhere fancy if you wanted to or buy a nice gift you've been eyeing for a while.

helps you with your schoolwork, 100%. most of the time niko tutors you because he wants you to actually learn the material, but if you're feeling lazy and just wanna get it over with, niko will just give you the answers.

this is a big deal because i love him and all but, niko gives me the vibe he's super stingy with his work 😭.

"this is the last time i'm going to just give you the answers, y/n." niko sighs out. "you have to start doing your homework by yourself."

niko's said that dozen of times but he's still giving you the answers free of charge. can you guys say #whipped 🤣?

LOL speaking of school, if you ever text him during class, i highly doubt that niko would entertain you 😭😭 (it's out of love, though)

y/n 💗: hiii baby imy 🥰

pretty boy: do your work, y/n.

y/n 💗: ALL I DID WAS SAY HI

pretty boy: pay attention.

y/n 💗: fine ur so lame 👎

pretty boy: whatever you say. i miss you too, by the way.

he likes to moves your hair out your face because he wants to see your pretty face better.

which is why you have to do the same with him 🥰!!!!!! makes him blush like crazy.

gets soooo soft when you post him or even take pictures of you and him together :') just the thought of you wanting to show him off makes him soooo happy.

he won't entertain you if you make a tiktok, though LOL. he's very stubborn in his belief that it's stupid.

just stands in the background with his arms crossed if you try to make him do a dance or something 😭 (he does think you look cute, though).

niko has such nice eyelashes but i doubt he's aware of it 'cause he's, y'know, a boy 🙄.

"my eyelashes are ... cute?" he questions. niko wasn't even aware that such a trivial thing like his eyelashes could be considered cute.

"yes, oh my god," you gush. "they're so long and nice, i wish mine were like that," you groan, examining yours through the camera of your phone.

"you're so weird, y/n," he says, a blush staining his cheeks. "your eyelashes are nicer," he mumbles as he kisses your forehead.

he's one of those people that prefers to be alone, but you're the exception. you know?

niko likes to keep to himself most of the time, but that whole thing doesn't apply to you, because he'd choose to be with you over being alone anytime :')

[celestialmango]

For Sun, Moon, Eclipse and Glitch: How do you feel about playing with prey before, during and/or after noms? This can be with ones that you're friends with, so they know there's no danger and are happy to play along (i.e. hiding, running, struggling and 'fighting') or (particularly for the more gremlin like or straight up gremlin ones ) ones that are unaware and/or aren't safe ~Shy

☀️: Soooo like hide and seek or tag only I'm always it and I have to nom them after I catch them? That sounds fun! I don't think I could do that to multiple people though so it would have to be a one on one type of game. I dunno about during and I would have to figure out what types of games we could play while they're in my stomach. I can't think of a lot besides a few word games or poking at each other.

🌕: Oh I definitely like a chase doesn't matter if they're willing or not, the thrill of it just makes swallowing them a much, much better experience, it's wonderful to spook them when I finally catch them. The sound of willing prey laughing when I do is delightful. The screams of unwilling prey are very entertaining.

For the willing I would like them to take a nap after I swallow them because I would definitely tire them out by letting them run off from their hiding place so the game can continue till they're too tired to play anymore. For unwilling I would end it much faster because I want them to squirm...that is unless I take a clear liking to them during it, then I'd just tire them out and make them nap like my willing prey.

For ones that aren't safe? They're the ones I torment the most but they've done something very very very naughty to deserve that treatment from me and I would be much much meaner about it, they deserve to be punished after all.

🌑☀️: I've never really thought about play beforehand or at all, I do enjoy getting my stomach rubbed from the inside but I don't consider that play. I suppose it is something I may have to try out.

👾💧: Hehehe, yes yes, messing with them is so so so much fun. they'll scream and I'll play, want them to struggle a lot a lot a lot. unwilling and unknowing are so much fun. It's less fun if they're willing, they won't struggle hard enough.....but willing is nice sometimes. Yes, less scary, more playful and so very very nice. Gentler, softer, sweeter. Rarely like this, so very rare. Real game then. Pounce, play, but gentle. Such sweeeet and fragile prey. Hurt them then no longer sweet, no no, do not want that for the rare rare few who will play with me happily. Soft feeling, nice feeling. Nice nice nice.

🥭: gonna be honest, did not expect Muse Glitch to say something like that.(Honestly treat all these questions like an interview, I just type out what they want me to write.)

👾💧: ehehehaha, not even you you you know me well enough yet. Play more, you'll see.