#i drew this during a funeral lmao

[soupmonarchart]

Another Card to add to the Deck! Jiseon as the 8 of Hearts!

Super excited to print these when the set is done!

[cyndraws]

Kaishin secret santa 2023

This is a Kaishin roleswap au for @blueamphibians! I hope you enjoy this art + my ramblings on the au underneath. Because of course, I couldn't just leave it as one piece of art haha (ehem please buckle in for preparation)

Many thanks to @dcmkkaishinevents / Mack for hosting this event, it was super fun participating and interacting with the community <3 <3 As a side note, I would absolutely recommend it to others who are considering signing up next year. Everyone is very friendly!

(Hey Blue, I had more art planned but unfortunately many things came up. But I hope you enjoy this anyways! I might draw some more for you later ^-^ Thanks so much for this prompt <3 <3)

Edit: I have decided that now you will receive a completed arts + ramblings + some WIPs behind the scene hahahaha https://www.tumblr.com/cyndraws/737208478471487488/kaishin-secret-santa-2023-extras-basically-wips?source=share

AU ramblings under the cut (ngl it's a lot):

Random details and notes that don't really fit anywhere. Mostly about the fanart:

Kaito is 1 year older than Shin and is taller than him

This scene is set over the Haido City hotel. In the distance you can see Shiriyomi Trust Hotel (can't full recognise it behind Kaito but I assure you I drew it lol), Tokyo tower (easy to spot) and Roppongi Hills Mori Tower (Just behind Shin on the right, the one with the lights in a --u-- shape) Main reference: https://www.detectiveconanworld.com/wiki/Haido_City_Hotel

I was also screaming at the Kaishin pic in ED70 throughout this LMAO.

Kaito breaks through Shinichi's mysterious KID persona in this drawing and Shinichi shyly reveals his face behind the mask. Kaito then produces a blue flower, claiming it matches Shinichi's beautiful eyes (he's also the one who bred it)

Kaito has extra pockets sewn into his uniform to carry more tricks. This wasn't really necessary in canon, but here, Kaito has to be prepared to investigate at any moment.

Lmao help me render hair *stares at Kaito's* Cool effect but not quite right. I need to go experiment later.

Kaito/Shin getting shrunk (aka Conan situation) never happens in this au. But Haibara and the other victims are still around. Haibara still lives at the professor's.

~

Background:

Yusaku was much more entangled and involved with Toichi and his fight with the Black Org. Side note but in this au, Snake is from a division of the Black Org

As a result, they both end up being killed during the fateful accident. Yes, both Shinichi and Kaito are there for it. They were going to be introduced to each other on that day, but well,,, we can see the way it ended.

It wasn't well known that the Kuroba and Kudo family were close at all. Extra vigilance was taken after the funerals to ensure their safety. Their families parted ways for the better or worse after thsi event.

Yusaku's and Toichi's friendship/rivalry included collaborating for some heists, having a second secret base in the Kudo mansion, and Yusaku donning the Night Baron costume... even if he was just hidden in a car and sending information to Toichi via an earpiece lol.

After their husbands' deaths, Yukiko and Chikage meet up occasionally and travel together in secret.

~

Shinichi:

Shinichi never became a famous detective. The years after Yusaku died in the tragic accident, Yukiko and him tried their best to move on with varying success. Shinichi's dream to become a famous detective never came to fruition.

This was because for various reasons including not having Yusaku's guiding hand to develop Shin's detective skills, was only being taken to crime scenes for a year, and of course the trauma.

After avoiding detective work as much as he could (well considering that he's still a corpse magnet), Shinichi finally starts to dig through his memories. From then, he uncovered a strange inconsistency with the logic of his father's death and starts to obsess over the idea that it was a murder.

Shin painstakingly and slowly investigates in the shadows with his *ehem* admittedly rusty detective skills and chases after the very little crumbs left by the organisation. What he uncovers is that the accident wasn't one at all, but premeditated murder by an encompassing third party.

Shinichi finally finds a lead to,,, Jii Konosuke. This takes quite a few years, and Shinichi is 15 when he confronts Jii.

Jii reveals everything after Shinichi's deduction and also mistaking him for Kaito. And such Shinichi is brought into the fold. Shinichi also makes up his mind to take on the KID mantle, greatly sympathising with the fellow teen whose father was also involved.

The years after Shinichi uncovers the truth, he learns many skills such as disguise, acting and magic from Jii and Chikage. However, his magic skills will never be on par with Kaito's.

Shinichi in this au has more acting and disguise skills from living with his mother. She passed this skills onto him, and they bonded over it to recover from their grief.

When Shinichi is 17, he officially takes on the role of KID. Chikage permanently locked the KID cave in the Kuroba house, and the KID cave settled in its new home in the Kudo mansion. Inside the second base previously used by Toichi and Yusaku.

Shinichi as KID:

Well, he's just as dramatic as Kaito in canon, but it's a different kind of dramatic. Shin is more of a mysterious and cryptic phantom thief and wears a menacing Night Baron mask. He overall speaks less, and when he does, he says a lot of dramatic lines. Like in theatre almost, with plenty of double meanings.

He takes on a lot of aspects from the Phantom Lady and Jii's interpretation of KID.

And also, I was inspired by the Black Knight, Shiragami in canon, and AngelicSentinel's fantastic fic, Heart of Eternity. I guess you could describe it as more theatrely, cool and princely. He's still very athletic (laughing at Shinichi being Tarzan as Shiragami)

Unlike Kaito, Shin's notices often involve cryptic riddles. It satisfies Shinichi's puzzle loving side and adds to his mysterious reputation.

It's funny to me how Akako's 'Demon of Light' moniker is still accurate haha

Shinichi investigates a little in the shadows and is overall a touch more hot-headed than Kaito KID

He uses a lot more gadgets to cover for his lesser magic skills. He's still learning though! A lot of them are references to Conan's and KID's in canon. Between Jii and Agasa, he gets a lot of them haha. This includes:

Mask/monocle -> voice changer, mask to cover for poker face, zoom and night vision, tracker, microphone and radio, gas mask.

Transmitter/microphone -> button stickers, bugs in general, cufflinks. In some cases, a camera but it must be asked for first. Shin uses these to cover for Kaito's doves in canon.

Wristwatch -> Clock of course for his heist times, tranquilliser, emergency flashbomb (KID has one in canon too)

Shoes -> jet powered rollerskates (equivalent to skateboard). Of course, Shin still kicks things but it looks more to take down the occasional criminal, trigger emergency traps, and more. He doesn't kick often because it doesn't really suit the image of KID + it's a unique skill to have.

+ other usual KID gadgets -> smoke, flash, sleeping bombs, grapple gun, hang glider, etc.

~

Kaito:

He's still an aspiring magician

Since there's a rising amount of cases in Beika, Kaito gets recommended by Nakamori because of his magic skills. The idea is that his knowledge of magic tricks will help uncover the criminals' tricks... Well this includes basically all cases lol. It works though! And the news of Meitantei Kaito starts to spread.

Kaito falls in love with the dramatics and triumphs of figuring out a criminal's trick. He starts to get called into Beika every time a case is discovered. One different to Shin is that Kai gets called to the cases instead of the cases coming to him.

His detective persona is like KID's in canon - flirty, dramatic, confident, charming, a bit of a pervert, and a classic showman's personality. Aoko is sick of it hahaha.

Kai's deduction show is very dramatic. He uses flashy magic tricks to reveal evidence and tricks, and uses his magic to take down criminals.

This includes his acrobatics, trusty card gun and traps he set beforehand. I like to headcanon that Kaito invented his cardgun first before integrating into KID. Kaito's cardgun includes the normal sharp cards (Kaito uses it to pin down criminals with their clothes, cut ropes, etc), tranquilliser laced cards, smoke and flash bombs. And also sleeping bombs but he uses it vary sparingly because even that toes the law a little too much... Megure is exasperated but the criminals are taken down quickly without much harm so he lets it slide

Kaito also follows in the spirit of dubious investigation. He changes his voice, uses his doves to spy on others, uses disguises (very very rarely), and is noisy overall.

Kaito and Hakuba:

Has a detective rivalry with Hakuba.

Hakuba still thinks, even in this au, that Kaito is KID. After all, Shin's profile is very similar to Kaito's. Kaito vehemently denies it but acts like a KID fan around Hakuba to annoy him. He isn't really though, citing KID's magic to be third rate, but he is still intrigued.

Hakuba offhandedly slips in wording and insinuations to Kaito's huge annoyance. You can imagine them bickering at a crime scene while Megure is just Too Used to this.

Much later on, when Kaito learns Shinichi's identity, Kaito tells Shinichi's about Hakuba's warnings. So Kaito is kinda a messenger between the two. Despite Hakuba being annoying, Kaito knows he can trust him.

~ Other character interactions:

Shinichi and Kaito:

Shinichi is still a corpse magnet. So he encounters a case, calls the police, and escapes as fast as he can after giving a witness statement. This is partly to avoid the awkwardness of meeting Megure and the police officers (he hasn't met them since his father died), as well as his new night job.

This results in the most frustrating yet amusing situation where Shin and Kaito miss meeting each other for quite a few years. Shinichi is busy hurrying off while Kaito is called to the scene and busy listening to the details.

Quick sketch I may/may not fully finish in the future:

Description: Set in suburban Beika. Shinichi is at the foreground, looking at his watch and worrying about meeting Jii on time. Meanwhile, next to a police car, Megure merrily discusses case details to Kaito. Kaito is glancing over to Shinichi in curiosity while keeping an ear open. He has his hands in his pockets. Behind Megure, the scene has police tape barring entrance.

~

Kaito thinks KID is a third rate magician but can appreciate the dramatics and mysteriousness. He is Intrigued. This leads to a meeting later on. Kaito uses his connection to Nakamori.

Shinichi is of course startled by Kaito's namedrop.

... Sorry no more details/plan about their meeting. It's definitely a dramatic face off though.

Regarding Shinichi's identity reveal, I was playing around with the idea that Snake is there, threatening the two at gunpoint and sneering over the '"lovely family reunion between father and son". It would definitely spur Kaito to grill Shin for more details

~

Shinichi and Hattori:

Hattori hears about the "Meitantei of the East" and goes off to meet him and challenge him to a deduction battle. He doesn't know how to contact him, so he goes with the strat of wandering around Beika until he runs into a case. He figured that with the high rate of cases being reported, he's eventually run into Kuroba ,,, yeah hahahaha Thats his entire plan

Luckily for Hattori, his detective luck exponentially multiplies with Shin's and a scream runs out. As Shinichi is reporting the crime and tried to head off, Hattori slings an arm around his shoulders to stop him from sneaking off.

Hattori loudly greets him as Kuroba despite Shinichi's insistence that "No, I am NOT Kuroba, please get your arm off me". Insert much scepticism from Hattori.

Even after they part ways, this isn't the last they see of each other. Hattori keeps wandering around Beika while running into Shinichi. They eventually become friends huhu.

Shinichi and the Detective Boys:

The Detective Boys admire Kaito a lot. Obviously they've watched the news reports on TV. So when they see him at the park playing soccer, they glomp him HAHAH Poor Shinichi

At this point I think people mistaking Shinichi as Kaito can be a running gag. The Detective Boys keep annoying Shinichi and even attempt breaking into the 'Edo house' to see the ghosts... Shinichi is still not happy. And also, when they visit Haibara, they're basically next doors so Shinichi's never going to get them out of his life.

Despite the annoyance, he eventually becomes fond of them and takes on the big brother sort of role.

When Kaito and Shinichi get acquainted, they take the DB on outings a lot. The DB is very fond of Kaito-nii-san and Shinichi-nii-san.

[soratsuart]

Alright, here we go again. QSMP Day 26 Lore Update, based on what I saw and what I gathered from other people's summaries on Twitter:

First of all, I'd like to address the fact that Census Bureau seems to be more active these days, since Cucurucho was already spying on Vegetta before warning him about the no diamond rule.

Early on not much happened, Wilbur and Philza were introduced to each other's eggs and they had some family bonding time. It is now canon that Wilbur is Philza's son and Chayanne's brother, as well as Tallulah being their granddaughter and niece respectively. When things start to go downhill is after they log off, at Slime's stream.

At first Slime was just gathering resources, running away from mobs and trying to invoke angel!Rubius. Since q!Slime didn't know about Flippa's death at that point, he just kept finding stuff to give her whenever he sees her again (pain).

Everything would change with Cucurucho's visit while he was mining. They started asking him a bunch of questions about Flippa, and Slime started suspecting something had happened to her and demanded they told him. Cucurucho told him to "figure it out yourself", but in the end they did show him the clip of Mariana killing Flippa again.

Slime then enters a state of denial, refusing to believe his daughter is dead and hallucinating with her, however he seemed to finally accept her death after invoking angel!Rubius. Rubius addressed the fact that he had promised him an extra life for Flippa, though he said he had to "ask his father and other people" (aka he most likely promised him that in the first day of the event without knowing if he was allowed to do that lmao). He told Slime he had to choose between bringing back Flippa or Tilín, and Slime ultimately chose Flippa, but asked to give the life to Tilín if she didn't want to revive a second time. He also asked Rubius to not tell Quackity he was given the option to choose.

We now move on to Bad and Foolish, who learn about Leo's "friends": a platypus called Perry, Cucurucho themself and a mysterious black creature called Dark. This creature looks very similar to the monster Quackity drew according to a vision he had after Tilín's death, and according to Leo it protects her, though Foolish isn't very sure of this.

On his part, Maxo was getting drunk due to his grief over his egg's, Trump, death until he meets up with angel!Rubius, who accidentally tells him about Flippa's possible revival. Maxo confronts him about his own child's death and Rubius makes a deal with him to revive Trump if Maxo builds a church for him. However, soon would appear Cucurucho, who tells Maxo not to trust Rubius, and instead tells him that there's a chance that Trump can revive if he is online the next day, during the funeral for the eggs that have died. Maxo threatened then Cucurucho if they didn't actually bring back Trump, and they just... Laughed at him.

He then goes to visit Bad and Foolish, who by this point have had to fight a bunch of Withers Rubius spawned, to tell them about the deal and ask them for help. However they get interrupted soon by the binary code creature as well as more dragons attacking them. They are able to run away and get shelter though.

Maxo, Bad and Foolish start discussing and theorising some stuff, with Bad and Foolish agreeing to help Maxo if Cucurucho doesn't help him after all. Maxo also expresses worry that he's going to be turned into a robot like Luzu, as he was also told to go visit him by Cucurucho.

Turns out: Cucurucho was spying them, which they realised, and they followed Maxo as he ran away from them to make sure he actually believes them and tells him to trust the Census Bureau of the QSMP. The other two went their separate ways, with Bad going out of his way to check up on all the eggs and make sure no one would die out of neglect again.

And I believe that is all. Take into account I had to gather much of this from other people's commentary + the official update accounts so I might have left something out, but hopefully this is good enough.

Also, it seems something will be happening at the funeral, and since someone said "the worst is yet to come" my bets are Dark is gonna appear and won't be as kind as Leo believes it to be, but that's just a theory.

[waynes-multiverse]

Hahaha I love that "a little Shakespeare" was a warning, but as Eng lit major I couldn't agree more 😂

Douchface has shown up and I was livid several times during this part. Read my outrage below 👇

“So she’s talked about me,” he said.

I wish you could see the face I made when I read this, but it was pretty much 😒😒😒

“Oh, believe you me, that’s not something to brag about, Mike.”

Give it to him, Beau! 😂👏

“I’m Michael, her fiancé,” he tried to introduce himself with an outstretched hand.

THE AUDACITY!!!! I gasped!

What are you? Delusional? Do we need to 51/50 you????

“You’re missing an ex in there. As in no longer, and wish we’d never been,” you said.

Great comeback! Bravo 😂 I love her sass!

For a moment, you paused with indecision. You didn’t want to make a scene here in the middle of a bar. Not in front of your friends, where half of them were police officers. You didn’t want to stop them from having a good time either.

Gah, I hate this! What a manipulative ass to put her in that situation! Of course, she doesnt want to discuss this in front of her new friends 😬

“That’s such a lie! You wouldn’t even talk to me at the funeral,” Michael shot back.

Who cares, Michael? Whoooo? NO ONE!

He's such an immature, gaslighting, conniving little prick... Like shut up! (I screamed this several times during this conversation with her. Pretty much at every line he said 😂)

“Look, you know how hard it was for me to come out here and beg like a dog, but here I am…because I still love you.”

“She’s not you,” he said.

DEAR GOD! This man exhausts me! Go home, Micheal! GO HOME!!!

But I loved everything that came after! Cassie bringing her tequila, Jenny offering her help, and of course, Beau *swoon* 🥹🫶

Not only had Avery bought a gun, but he’d given her some unhinged, quasi- “If I die” speech that had freaked her the hell out. 

Yeah, that was great! 🤣 That was the point in the show when I really started to get annoyed by Avery and his whiny ass lmao

I loved how you described those scenes by the way and provided the inner monologue for Beau! It's so awesome not only to see his emotions but to read them as well!

Beau’s brows rose in interest, but again, he tried not to picture you in some tight-ass yoga pants.

Oh please do, Sheriff 😏

“Only two calls and eleven texts before lunch, but I’m not answering. He’ll get the hint and go home soon,” you said.

Will he, though? I'm inclined to drop the "idiot sandwich" gif again 🙄

“Let’s just say?” you repeated. Your brows drew together in frustration. “Why don’t you just say it? God knows you know everything about my messy life.”

Hahaha damn he pissed her off! 😂 (And I love the callback to his little comment in the beginning when he still hoped he'd never meet her angry side lol)

And you brought the old clam back! 👏👏👏

And not just because you had some…unnamed feelings for her father. 

You guys are driving me nuts! It's called "liking each other." Google it. Stop messing around and make out already. You both want to 😝 (I think I'm still upset over that whole Michael annoyance and lashing out. I apologize... kinda 😂🙈)

“God. Maybe he wants to get back together with his ex-wife,” you realized, with some small shock.

Ugh, yikes. God no... 👀

the sniping and the arguments and the misunderstandings between them had been love all along…

Mmmh, yeah, like kindergartners tugging on pigtails 😆

“Michael?! What are you doing here?” you asked.  He stood there with determination set across his face. “We really need to talk.”

YOU ALREADY DID!!!

I knew he was dense 😒🤦‍♀️

And I know I used waaay too many gifs in this part, but like I stated in the beginning I was livid and ahd to express myself. I channeled it into gifs. You're welcome 🤣

Such an exciting and fantastic part! I honestly love to get upset while reading and yell at characters. I had so much fun during this 😅🫶

Can't wait to see how she deals with Michael in the next chapter! 🤍

Take Me Home - Part 5

Pairing: Beau Arlen x F. Reader 

Summary: You are another lost soul at Sunny Day Excursions. You’re aiming to settle in Helena, Montana, where Beau Arlen is the new sheriff in town. But you’ve both got a past you’re running from. 

AN: Welcome back, friends! We’re gonna start ramping up from here on out.

Word Count: 5K

Tags/Warnings: Angst and tension, a bit of heartbreak, a little Shakespeare, and another small cliffhanger…

❤️ Series Masterlist

Part 5: Not That Simple

“I’m keeping close tabs on Carla and Emily just to be safe,” Beau admitted. 

Your face became the picture of concern. But before you could respond, a man approached the table, tall and lean, with a shaggy cut of dark blonde hair. He wore a pair of faded jeans, boots, and a gray Chicago FD t-shirt. 

Your face paled, and your mouth parted in surprise. 

“Hey there, stranger,” he said with a smile. 

“Michael?” you gasped. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Beau’s eyes widened. Michael was younger than him, closer to your age. And cocky too.  

“Hey, baby,” Michael said. His smile quirked with charm, but his next words were anything but charming. 

“We need to talk,” he said, raising his brows.

“We actually don’t,” you retorted in a firmer voice. Cold even. You straightened in your seat. 

Beau saw none of your softness and good humor from earlier. This was a different woman, and he was actually proud of you for standing your ground. Though he realized then that he’d never gotten on your bad side. (He hoped he never did.)

Michael frowned, sighing through his nose. He seemed to expect your reaction, to an extent, but was still disappointed. His gaze slid to Beau. 

Seeming to realize his manners were lacking, he reached out his hand.

“Sorry for interrupting. Michael Hadley,” he greeted.

Beau stared at the other man’s hand for a moment. Instead of shaking it, he held all his true thoughts inside and flashed the newcomer an easy grin, as well as the badge on his belt. 

“Sheriff Arlen,” he replied, raising a brow. “So you’re Michael.”

Michael met your eyes briefly, then Beau’s again. Michael’s hand lowered back to his side.

“So she’s talked about me,” he said.

Beau’s eyes were sharper when they took the other man in. 

“Oh, believe you me, that’s not something to brag about, Mike.”

You had to bite your lip so you wouldn’t smile. Michael’s politeness thinned, but just as his mouth opened to offer a retort, Cassie and Jenny returned with the drinks.

“Hi, there,” Jenny said with civility (sort of), but her blue eyes raked over Michael in an assessing way. She’d clocked your surprise and discomfort from across the room.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to stop the party,” Michael said, making you want to scoff.

Of course you did, you thought.

“I’m Michael, her fiancé,” he tried to introduce himself with an outstretched hand. Jenny also ignored that hand in order to set down the drinks.

It gave you the opportunity to interject with some reality.

“You’re missing an ex in there. As in no longer, and wish we’d never been,” you said. You crossed your arms and met Michael’s annoyed look with your firm one.

He eventually sighed and rested a hand on the back of the booth, behind your seat. You twisted to face him, but you were purposeful in leaning away from him.

Beau had to just watch the scene unfold. He didn’t like the way Michael leaned in, crowding your personal space when you were clearly trying to create distance.

“Can we talk?” Michael asked you. “Please?”

For a moment, you paused with indecision. You didn’t want to make a scene here in the middle of a bar. Not in front of your friends, where half of them were police officers. You didn’t want to stop them from having a good time either.

You met Cassie and Jenny’s eyes, and finally Beau’s. Despite the controlled, almost lazy way he’d handled Michael, you could see he didn’t look happy. You sighed.

“Sorry. Give me a minute,” you said. You got up out of the booth and went with Michael to a somewhat private corner across the restaurant.

Meanwhile, Beau tried not to seem like he was keeping an eye on you two. Cassie and Jenny were too, while sipping on their respective drinks.

“What’s the story there?” Cassie asked.

“Cheating ex,” Beau supplied.

“Great,” Jenny said wryly. Her lips pursed as she met Cassie’s knowing frown. They’d been there before.

Cassie turned to Beau and bumped his shoulder with her own. 

“You okay there, Sheriff?” Cassie asked him. Beau flashed her a look that showed he was unsettled. 

“I’ve got another one to add to the punch list,” he replied.

“I can’t believe you’d ambush me like this!” you whisper-yelled.

Michael crossed his arms in defense. The two of you ducked a server who was coming in hot with a plate of buffalo chicken wings.

“You came all the way to Montana? For what?” you continued. “I already said everything I had to say to you last year. And at Mary’s funeral. Thanks again for that, asshole.”

“That’s such a lie! You wouldn’t even talk to me at the funeral,” Michael shot back. “And you haven’t been answering my calls, my emails. What the hell was I supposed to do?”

“You’re supposed to respect me,” you snapped. Though you couldn’t help the emotion making your voice shake, just a little. “You’re supposed to respect me, and my choices. That’s what you’re supposed to do. But I don’t why I should expect you to start now."

You started to walk away from him, but he grabbed at your hand. You turned back around and jerked your hand out of his grasp.

“It’s over. It’s been over for months. Damn near a year,” you said. “What do you want?”

He looked down at you through sad eyes under his furrowed brows.

“I never wanted it to be over,” he said quietly.

“Well, you pretty much made that decision for us,” you said, crossing your arms. You didn’t know whether it was to stand firm, or to shield yourself. “And I’m done. Quite frankly, I could live the rest of my life without seeing you again.”

“Come on. You don’t mean that,” he said.

He genuinely looked gutted, which was the confusing part. You shook your head and tried to blink the frustrated tears out of your eyes.

“I don’t know what you want from me,” you said.

“I want to say I’m sorry. And I am, more than you know. I want…I want to ask if you can forgive me,” he all but pleaded. He touched your arms, not quite grasping. For the first time since you’d known him, he seemed desperate. “Look, you know how hard it was for me to come out here and beg like a dog, but here I am…because I still love you.”

You were shocked into silence for a moment, but not out of happiness.

Then, you had to sigh. You held up a hand against his chest, a subtle move at pushing him away. 

“I can’t give that to you. Even your apology is hollow. Because what you did…” you said, on a halting breath. “You did it to me for years, Michael. Pretty much from the beginning of our relationship, if it ever was one.” 

You shook your head as a tear made its way down your cheek. 

“And if you could do that, then you never really loved me,” you said.

Michael’s eyes fell away, to hide the emotion stinging in them.

“So…just go home,” you told him. “Be with Kate if you want. I could really give a shit.”

Once again, Michael held your wrist when you tried to leave, this time more gently. He met you with frustrated blue eyes. Those eyes you used to drown in. 

“She’s not you,” he said. 

You slipped out of his grip and uttered a laugh devoid of all humor.

“That, you should’ve known from the beginning,” you said.

He was hurt.

And when he was hurt, he tended to cover it up with anger. His jaw began to work with frustration.

“What, so you’re just going to run away? Live in this dusty piece of shit town until you die?” he said, with the derision you’d come to expect from him when he didn’t get what he wanted. 

“Go home, Michael,” you repeated. “I’m not going back.” 

“Everything okay?” Beau asked, when you finally returned to the table. He didn’t tell you that he, Jenny, and Cassie had been watching on standby, in case Michael tried to press his luck and get more grabby. It had taken everything within Beau to stay in his seat for the past ten minutes.

You gave him a smile and took up the shot of tequila Cassie had brought for you. You downed it and grimaced at the burn.

“I’m good,” you said, with a bit of difficulty. Part of you felt accomplished, that you’d faced Michael and hadn’t let him soften your resolve. Yet there was a big part of you—not so deep down—that felt like utter crap.

“Sorry for the unnecessary drama,” you muttered. 

Jenny gave you a more serious look. One that said she had no problem stepping in if she needed to.

“If you ever feel unsafe, just let one of us know,” she said. 

“That’s right. If he doesn’t leave it alone, all you need to do is call,” Beau added. Cassie echoed that sentiment with a nod. You met Beau’s gaze, despite the uncertainty inside you.

If you need me, call me, his eyes said. 

You nodded then, with a thankful smile. 

Beau couldn’t help it. He felt protective of you. It welled up in his chest and simultaneously felt heavy like a stone. And he could admit, if just to himself, that it was in the personal sense. 

He tried to remember that his life was complicated right now. Too complicated probably, for all of that…but he cared about you. And he didn’t want to see you hurt.

Out of the corner of his eye, Beau spotted Michael Hadley at the bar. He was drinking a beer with an angry frown, and no good written all over his face.

Carla called Beau in a tizzy yesterday morning. 

Not only had Avery bought a gun, but he’d given her some unhinged, quasi- “If I die” speech that had freaked her the hell out. 

In searching Avery’s vacant hotel room, Beau found the missing pages of Paige’s journal. Pages that contained a seed phrase passcode to unlock the $15 million crypto account she and Luke had stolen. 

If Avery had those pages, then it only confirmed that Avery had made a play for the money in order to save his failing business. He was attempting to break the encrypted code to unlock the account, likely for the shady-ass people Paige stole the money from in the first place.  

Naturally, Beau had gone looking to bring the man in for questioning. He’d found Avery at a different, much seedier hotel, being led away by another man who walked and talked like a killer. Beau rightly assumed he was a hitman, gunning for Avery, and quite literally about to take out the trash.

Maybe the people he was working with were tired of waiting on him to unlock the account. Or maybe he’d already done it, and now they’d decided they didn’t need him anymore.

Beau was able to save Avery’s life, shooting the hitman. Then he’d arrested Avery. In return for that save, Avery had been giving Beau the runaround all night, with a side helping of audacity. 

“What’s your plan here, man?” Beau asked. He leaned forward in his chair across from Avery’s. A narrow table lied in between them within the small holding cell for questioning. 

“New identity? Thailand? Or maybe you’re not into the whole heat thing. Maybe Winnipeg,” Beau posed, with all due sarcasm. “You see, these people don’t forgive. And they don’t forget. And the ones that steal from them rarely die alone, which means you have put Carla, and you’ve put my daughter into danger. Did you even think about that?”

Right about now, Beau himself was beyond forgive and forget. In fact, he was irate. But he held it all down beneath a thin line of professionalism, despite the fire in his eyes. 

Avery rested his elbows on the table as well.

“Everything I’ve done has been to protect my family. That’s all you need to know,” he said. “You on the other hand. You’ve made quite the mess, haven’t you? Killing that man put us all in more danger.”

He then leaned back in his chair, as if he held all the cards, and Beau was just a monkey wrench in his plans. It was a good front, but Beau saw right through it all. Avery was bluffing through his ass.

Still, he put on a good show.

“And now I’d very much like to speak to my lawyer,” he said. 

It took everything within the sheriff to stop himself from reaching across the table, grabbing the other man by the collar, and yanking him down hard on the table, face-first. 

Instead, he got up from his seat, deceptively calm. The only explosion of his rage came when he kicked his chair hard on his way out, making it slide across the room and hit the wall. He yanked the cell door open and closed it firm behind him.

He knew he couldn’t hold Avery, not even on Paige’s journal pages. As Avery had so cleverly pointed out, the money hadn’t been reported stolen (why would criminals drop a dime on themselves?). So Beau would let Avery go, for now. All he could do was wait for the cocky son of a bitch to mess up, even more than he already had. 

Beau hated waiting.

But his next step was returning to his office and calling Carla. He asked her to join Emily in staying with him, until this thing with Avery blew over. Likely the people he was working with knew where he lived, knew how to find Carla and Emily. 

Carla sounded shaken even on the phone, but she agreed.

“Is Emily at work right now?” he asked.

“Yeah. I’ll tell her,” Carla said, releasing a breath. “I’ll take her to your place again tonight, and I’ll bring an overnight bag for myself.”

“Good,” he said. “Thank you.”

After hanging up, Beau leaned back in his office chair and covered his bearded face with his hands. He rubbed at his tired eyes. What the hell do I do now? 

The answer eluded him, especially when a knock sounded against his door, disturbing his thoughts. He sighed.

“Yeah?”

“It’s me,” you answered from behind the door. “I come bearing baked goods.”

Beau’s eyes widened in surprise. He beckoned you to come in, and so you did. 

“Working hard, or hardly working?” you teased.

The sight of you was a balm to his frayed mind. Your familiar face, your pretty yellow sundress, the way you’d done your hair. It all managed to kick up his smile at seeing yours. Not to mention the delicious smelling basket you carried on your arm. The top was covered with a red checkered cloth. 

“Hey, there. How’re you doin’?” he greeted, trying to hide the brunt of his former frustration and worry behind a more upbeat attitude. 

He knew he hadn’t done well enough when your smile began to fall. 

“Sorry, did I come at a bad time?” you asked in concern. “Deputy Poppernak told me I could stop in real quick…”

Beau shook his head and waved you in. “It’s all right. Come in, please.” 

He stood and walked around his desk to sit on its edge. 

“I have a feeling I’m gonna want whatever’s in that basket,” he added, nodding at the whicker you carried. You offered it to him, and your warm hand brushed his on the exchange. 

“Just a little something,” you said. “And an apology for making a scene at the bar last night.”

Beau frowned. “You’re not really blaming yourself for that, are you?”

Though he soon brightened, whistling lowly when he found a half dozen chocolate chip muffins under the checkered cloth. A smile grew across his face when it dawned on him. The first thing you offered him when he met you was this very same treat. 

He had a feeling your muffins would be even better. (...And he tried not to think about the potential double meaning there.)

“Damn, between you and your aunt Denise, I’m gonna have to start running again,” he quipped. His eyes met yours in amusement. “And between you and me, I freakin’ hate running.”

You chuckled at that. “I’m more of a yoga girl, myself.”

Beau’s brows rose in interest, but again, he tried not to picture you in some tight-ass yoga pants.

“Thank you for this,” he said, instead, waving the basket of muffins. He set it down beside him on the desk. “I definitely needed a pick-me-up today.”

You searched his face and began to frown at what you saw there. He both looked and sounded…tired, down. Not himself. 

You drew closer and chanced resting a hand on his arm. “Hey, are you okay?”

Beau glanced down at your hand. He took in a deep breath through his nose before he met your gaze again.

“Yeah, don’t you worry. Everything’s fine,” he said. You gave him a somewhat chiding look.

“Beau, you don’t have to tell me it’s okay when it’s not,” you said.

He considered you ruefully. He should’ve known you were perceptive enough to see right through him. Or maybe he was just a shit actor. 

He blew out a breath and nodded. “I asked Carla and Emily to stay with me for the next few days. At least until this investigation of Avery plays out.”

Your patient expression melted into worry. You had a feeling he wouldn’t do that unless things were truly dangerous. 

“See, that’s what I didn’t wanna see,” he said, lightly bumping a curled finger under your chin. Despite yourself, you smiled a little. “I just want them where I can see them, is all.” 

He was putting on a good front, but you weren’t convinced. And Beau could see that. He nodded at you to change the subject. 

“Has Mike tried to contact you?” he asked. It was your turn to let out a sigh.

“Only two calls and eleven texts before lunch, but I’m not answering. He’ll get the hint and go home soon,” you said. 

But Beau was perceptive too. He knew you well enough to read your added thoughts as you frowned and looked away. It said, At least, you hope he will. 

Beau wanted to reassure you, not just to help make you feel safe, but because his gut churned with both unease and anger at the thought of that guy harassing you. 

Beau reached out and gave into the temptation to stroke a thumb across your cheek, earning not just your attention, but your widening eyes. 

“Hey. No more worrying, huh?” he said. His voice was quieter, warmer. He gave you a smile, along with an assured look.

“If anything happens—” he started to say, but you actually beat him to it. You held his hand to your cheek, surprising him this time.

“Yeah, I know. I’ve got the sheriff on speed dial,” you said. Your smile was sweet and teasing. 

Beau had to smile back. His gaze roamed your face. Then your eyes dipped down to his lips. There was heat between you, prickling across your skin and zipping up his spine. It was an inevitable, raw kind of feeling.

He wanted, more than anything, to lean in those precious few inches and find out what you tasted like… He wanted nothing more than to haul you up on this desk, hands sliding up the skirt of that sundress.  

But he held himself back with more self-control than he thought himself capable of. His hand fell away from your cheek. You looked up at him in confusion, and a bit of hurt.

“I’m sorry,” he said, in a lowered voice. “My life is…complicated.”

“And mine’s not?” you countered.

“Not the same,” Beau said. “Trust me. I uh, I’ve got some things in my past that I’m not proud of. Let’s just say you’re better off steering clear.”

“Let’s just say?” you repeated. Your brows drew together in frustration. “Why don’t you just say it? God knows you know everything about my messy life.”

Beau sighed. His gaze fell away from yours. 

“It’s not that simple, darlin’,” he said. 

He saw your disappointment, tinged with disbelief. As much as he didn’t want to hurt you, he also didn’t really have time to explain things properly to you. The truth was, he didn’t have time for this. 

“Look—” he tried, but you cut him off.

“No. It’s fine, I guess,” you said. You looked down at your shoes and muttered, mostly to yourself. “Em was right. You are an old clam.”

“What?” Beau asked in confusion. 

You shook your head and withdrew from him. 

“Okay, sorry. I just…you know what? I need to go,” you stumbled over your words a bit, and you backed away.    

It had Beau feeling at a loss already, not to mention the lance of guilt hitting him between the ribs. He stretched out a hand to you.

“Wait—”

You were too quick for him to stop, however. He watched you leave his office in a hurry, and mentally kicked himself all the while. He sighed and looked over at what you’d left behind—the damn basket of muffins. They smelled heavenly. Torturing him. 

Damn it all, he thought, until he played back the reel of what you’d said in his mind.

“Old clam?” he repeated. 

Once again, a knock on his office door disturbed his thoughts. Except this time, it was Deputy Poppernak.

He stopped short, seeing the furrowed look of confused, guilty frustration on the sheriff’s face. 

“Everything okay, boss?” 

“Fine,” Beau said, shaking his head. “What d’you got?”

Poppernak hesitated for a second, but he held up a file that he passed along. 

“Here’s everything I could dig up on the guy from the hotel shooting,” he said. 

 Good, Beau thought. A worthy distraction. 

You gave Poppernak a belated wave on your way out. You didn’t want to answer any questions or talk to anyone else. You just wanted to escape to your car, where you covered your face with your hands and tried to breathe through the tears stinging in your eyes.

Once again, you felt stupid. Your heart was racing in the worst of ways.

So you peeled out of the police station and headed home…

Or rather, you almost headed home. When you saw Dewell & Hoyt P.I. coming up on the right side of the road, you turned into the parking lot and went inside to see if your aunt was working. 

Cassie wasn’t in, but Denise and Emily were. You greeted them both with warm hugs (and you tried to hide your frustrations from the latter, especially). 

“What brought you in, hun?” Denise asked. 

“Nothing really. I was just in the area and decided to pop in,” you replied with a shrug. Denise smiled and rubbed your arm.

“Well good. Em’s actually going on a coffee run for us. You want anything?”

“No, no, I’m good,” you said. 

“You sure?” said Emily. “I can get you a banana bread or something.”

You smiled and shook your head, touching her arm in thanks. “It’s okay, honey. I just had lunch not too long ago.”

“Okay. Oh hey! Did you ask Dad about being on the podcast?” Emily asked. 

You blinked as you went blank for a moment. The last thing you wanted to do right now was see that man (even if your heart called you a liar). You narrowly kept yourself from lying to Emily as well.

“Uh, yeah, we did talk about it. He’s on board with the idea,” you said, trying to give her a smile. Maybe it didn’t reach your eyes, but Emily seemed to buy it. She smiled back in triumph.

“Yes! Okay, this is good. Now I just gotta start thinking of some questions and we’ll set a date to record the first episode,” she said, doing a little fist pump into the air. 

You tried to match her enthusiasm, but you knew you were falling short. Denise could see it too. Lucky for you, Emily ran off to get to the nearby bakery, the excitement keeping her face bright all the while. 

Denise turned to you knowingly. 

“Okay, grab a seat. I’ll make us some tea, and you can tell me what’s got you looking white as a sheet,” she said.

You sighed and sat down in the lounge area—a seating of couches and a chaise. You sat on the couch while Denise took the chaise. And between mugs of jasmine tea, you told her everything that happened at the precinct when you went to visit Beau.

When you were done explaining, Denise looked contemplative and sympathetic. However, you knew there was more to that look. 

“Okay. Honey, I know you don’t want to hear this, but he’s in a complex situation right now,” she said. “Between investigating Avery, and how it’s falling back on Carla and Emily—”

“I know. He told me about that,” you said. You were worried about them too. While you didn’t know Carla all that well, your friendship with Emily meant something to you. And not just because you had some…unnamed feelings for her father. 

Your bond with Emily had started at that damned camp, and solidified the night of Mary’s murder. “Trauma bonding” was a thing for a reason. But besides that experience, you genuinely enjoyed the girl’s company, hearing her talk about her interests in school, careers she was considering after college, and even helping her explore her creative side. She was young, but she was bright and mature for her age. 

You cared about what all this was putting her through…though you finally realized that Emily might not be comfortable with the thought of “you and Beau.”

“I don’t want to upset Emily with all this either,” you admitted. “I don’t even know what she thinks of her dad possibly dating again.”

And something else you hadn’t considered. Could all this shakeup between Avery and Carla, not to mention her and Emily staying at Beau’s place now…

“God. Maybe he wants to get back together with his ex-wife,” you realized, with some small shock. 

It wasn’t inconceivable, and it had tears welling up in your eyes for a whole different reason.

"Oh, honey, you don't know that," Denise started to say. You shook your head and set down your tea.

“You know what? I’m just gonna go home,” you said, but Denise tried to keep you with gentle hands on your arms.

“Come on. You don’t have to go,” she said. 

You shook your head and eased out of her grasp. 

“Sorry. I just…it’s his choice, and if he’s already made it…” you trailed. You didn’t want to even acknowledge that your heart was fracturing. “Well, if that’s the case, then I have to respect that.”

Denise didn’t know what else to say to you. But that was just as well. 

“Tell Em I’m sorry, but I had to go,” you said. 

Denise protested, but you left Dewell & Hoyt before your tears could fall in earnest. 

When you actually got home, you were exhausted. It was a case of emotional stress weighing down your body as you forced yourself up the stairs to your second-floor apartment.

You didn’t bother changing. Instead, you grabbed a familiar book of plays from your desk and dropped yourself onto the couch. You got comfortable with Much Ado About Nothing. You hadn’t finished reading it while at the camp, and you needed to brush up on it if you were going to be mentally prepared for the coming school year.

It felt like a world away, but at least with the characters in Much Ado, you had familiar ground. In the scene you were reading, the main characters, Beatrice and Benedick, were already at each other’s throats:

BENEDICK: What, my dear Lady Disdain! Are you yet living?  

BEATRICE: Is it possible disdain should die while she hath such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick? Courtesy itself must convert to disdain if you come in her presence.  

BENEDICK: Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I am loved of all ladies, only you excepted; and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart, for truly I love none. 

BEATRICE: A dear happiness to women. They would else have been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank God and my cold blood I am of your humor for that. I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me.

It was hard to believe that these two were supposed to fall in love. Actually, their later “epiphanies” would lead them to realize that the sniping and the arguments and the misunderstandings between them had been love all along…

But you’d come to realize that there was no “Benedick” for you in real life. Sometimes, the angry sniping wasn’t sexual tension. It was just a man who’d never truly respect you.

And sometimes, the arguments and misunderstandings were just two people in the right place at the wrong time, never quite meant to be. 

Thankfully, a knock at your door interrupted your romantic musings. 

Releasing a sigh, you set Much Ado on the glass coffee table in front of you. You got up from the couch and went to the front door, where you looked in the peephole. Your lips drew into a frown, but your disbelief had you unlocking the door before you could think better of it.

“Michael?! What are you doing here?” you asked. 

He stood there with determination set across his face.

“We really need to talk.”

AN: *Sigh.* This guy just doesn't learn, does he? And I'm not just talking about Michael.

Next Time:

“If you give me one more chance, I promise I won’t mess it up again. I’ll be the man you deserve,” Michael said, taking your hand and uncrossing your arms in the process. 

“Believe it or not, I took a week off without pay, just to be here and get a chance to say this to you: I love you. I love you. And I know now that it’s meant to be you.”

You hesitated, and even made the mistake of looking up into his eyes.

▶️ Keep Reading: PART 6

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[pestopastaenjoyer]

Nancy Wheeler and necklaces

Hi all! After re-watching clips from s1 and s2, I noticed something that hasn’t been present in the previous two seasons (other than chester but theres been a direct reason as to why lol): Nancy’s golden ballerina slipper necklace she wears pretty religiously in s1 and for some of her outfits in s2. It’s an easy connection to make that she simply just used to do ballet (in s1, she has a ballerina music box El rummages through while she’s exploring the Wheeler house and Robin plays with it again in s4 and I’ll talk about that much later), but at the same time, I personally find it odd that a piece she wore for all of s1 and most of s2 is oddly absent in parts of s2 and all of s3 and s4 - especially considering just about every outfit a character wears in ST has a deeper significance to it. Mike has literally been wearing the same goddamn Casio calculator watch for the whole entire show - why would they forget Nancy’s necklace?

Well?

I don’t think they did, because it was on purpose. I think it has a deeper meaning - specifically to her romantic relationships with Steve and Jonathan respectively.I also think that Mike wearing the same watch for the entirety of the show has a deeper meaning/connection to his character/his close connection to time itself but that is a completely different rabbit hole LMAO.

Anyways, lets look back at s1 Nancy

Something that really sticks out to me when watching a show is characters wearing articles of clothing/accessories/jewelry multiple times. In Nancy’s case, it’s her fabled necklace that’s practically glued to her body. While it is easy to just say “yeah, people have jewelry that they wear on a daily basis” (I have a necklace I wear basically every day if I can make it go with my outfit), I find it too intentional that she actually doesn’t wear it during and after her and Steve’s fight (and in her PJs while studying and at Will’s ‘funeral’, too, but like. come on). 

See? Nancy is very conveniently dressed in collared shirts when hanging out with Jonathan - rendering ‘unable’ to flaunt what I personally think is supposed to represent Steve. It’s a common (albeit mildly fucked up when you think about it) trope (is that even the right word?) in media to have necklaces tied to a specific romantic relationship. And again, maybe it’s just a necklace she wears because she used to do ballet (which WOULD also fit with her arc over the course of the show). At the same time, it could’ve also been a gift from Steve himself. He’s wealthy enough to buy a genuine gold necklace, and when you think about it, it makes sense on both a more concrete and abstract level as to why he would choose ballet slippers specifically. There was a part of me that was leaning more towards the first explanation before I re-watched Nancy’s s2 scenes. And then I was more convinced by my second theory. 

So let’s look at s2.

There’s the necklace! Does it show up anywhere else this season?

Conveniently collared shirt while she’s questioning her relationship with Steve?

Convenient turtleneck while she’s in a fight with Steve, afterwards going to Jonathan for advice? (and a callback to their fight in s1 at that)

Oh come on. You could’ve totally worn the necklace with that shirt, Nance.

The infamous ‘We like Steve. But we don’t love Steve’ scene featuring *drumrollllll* ....yet another collared shirt! I wonder what she’s going to do after this scene!

And finally, the nail in the coffin: no necklace. No Steve. But what now? 

A new necklace for s3!

If the conclusion I drew about Nancy and Steve’s relationship = the ballet slipper necklace is true, then her necklace from s3 represents her relationship with Jonathan. From what I can make out, it seems to be an opal on a thinner gold chain (compared to the ballet slipper necklace, which makes me lean more towards the idea that Jonathan maybe bought it for her as a gift). After consulting my good ‘ol pal Google, I’ve found that Opals symbolize a few things: faithfulness and (kind of more important to her individual character arc at this point in the story) confidence (they’re also thought to be good luck and I just thought that was cute). Nancy wearing a stone that represents the newfound confidence she’s gained while dating Jonathan is, in the context of her character, a perfect fit. She doesn’t wear an outfit in s3 that excludes the necklace - which makes sense because roughly scene she’s in, she’s with Jonathan (with the exception of the heart-to-heart with Karen). But what? I lied? There is an outfit that she doesn’t wear the necklace with in s3?

Very convenient, given the circumstances at the end of s3. 

Really this whole scene in general with everyone is just kind of off but I could ALSO go into a whole post about the last ten minutes of s3 but like. Not today haha.

Finally, s4.

(I honestly thought it was silver at first LMFAO)

Conveniently wearing a collared shirt? That doesn’t stop Nancy from wearing a necklace now.

Oddly enough, Nancy is not wearing her ‘Jonathan’ necklace - and certainly not her ‘Steve’ necklace. She’s wearing her “Nancy’ necklace: a simple golden chain with no charms/pendants. I wouldn’t have noticed this if I didn’t re-watch s1, but it looked oddly familiar to me.

I screamed when I realized this btw. It makes so much sense.

Anyways, what about her final scene outfit? The one where she re-unites with Jonathan?

Conveniently collared shirt strikes back after she’s been wearing a necklace all season! I wonder why!?

Moral of the story: I personally think that Nancy’s necklaces across the series are meant to represent her identity/relationships with the grand total of two boyfriends she has had over 4 seasons. I found it interesting that Robin made a big deal out of Nancy still having her ballerina music box while Steve was present, and the fact that being gifted jewelry/accessories in the context of Stranger Things isn’t a foreign concept (El’s ring in s4 being confirmed as a gift from Mike, Chrissy’s necklace). And even if these necklaces weren’t gifted by Steve and, very frankly, Jonathan, what they represent given Nancy’s character over the course of the show remains intact: Nancy starts off simple, shy, and on the edge of girlhood (the ballet slippers) - transitions into a confident and self-assured young lady (the opal necklace) - and finally, has fully become a woman (the simple golden chain). 

Anyways I am so tired rn I literally hunted for all of these SSs.

[hyacinthian-chateau]

Hey! Congrats on 200! Could I get a matchup please?

My hobbies are writing and reading mostly, sometimes a little art. I love character creating too

as for my likes, I love the band Mother Mother, rainy days, potstickers, painting my nails black, hmmm oh and bullying my best friend James, lmao

and for dislikes, hmmm I would have to say controlling people. Aaaand snow, math, humidity, my shop class :| and restricted freedom

personality? Uhmmm I talk really fast, my mouth moves faster than my brain heh, I can get pretty loud and weird when around people I like, but usually I’m pretty quite. I make fun of my friends out of love 💕 aaaand I speak mostly in rants lol

thanks so much in advance!

Hu Tao, ｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

You and Hu Tao are quite the spirited pair.

The Wangsheng Funeral Parlour had been a business that stood the test of time, alongside its long list of successors who conducted their duties invariably. At the present time, The establishment is headed by the 77th director, someone who you heard of but hadn't the pleasure of meeting as of yet. There had been various rumours that the current head was quite strange and unpredictable, but at the same time an admirable and witty individual.

The day you had met Hu Tao had been like any other. You had been dawdling among the various stalls after just having finished lunch with a close friend of yours at the Wanmin restaurant. It must have been the sociable air that you emanated that drew her to you. With a burst of confidence and a slight tug of your sleeve, you are greeted by the petite young woman who, without missing a beat, inquires if you were interested in taking a look at their funerary services.

The young director had adopted a rather upfront yet liberal approach when it comes to attracting potential clients, but instead of being declined or shooed away, You had given the brunette a friendly smile. It’s only when you finally introduce yourself and enthusiastically accepted the flyer from the young woman that she knew that you were one of a kind.

It takes a few years for you and Hu Tao to become close companions, all due to your similar tastes and character. On the days that you were neither working, you two would be found spectating at one of Xinyan's performances at the Harbour--She had taken an immense liking to your avant-garde taste in music, or hanging out with a few of her other friends like Xingqiu and Chongyun with the exorcist being the one to take the brunt of a few pranks--courtesy of the twin-tailed girl. The Cyro-user sincerely thinks you and the Hu Tao spell trouble whenever you are within hearing distance of each other. Seriously, it's scary how you, and she are on the same wavelength that you finish each other's sentences!

During one of the slower days, the young woman would be found tending to the front desk of the parlour after having sent everyone home. You had insisted on accompanying her until closing time, and here you two were: sitting closely behind the counter while perched on stools, nursing steaming cups of tea. It had been your idea to paint her nails, seeing that it would help pass the time. For some strange reason, you found the twin-tailed brunette being unusually quiet as you continued telling her about your day.

Unbeknownst to you, the young director had been struggling to name the emotion that always took a hold of her whenever you were nearby. From the slight giddiness when you take a firm grasp of her hand or the butterflies that would suddenly appear in her stomach when you tenderly brushed her locks as you fixed her slightly askew hat. Although the Pyro-user is young and inexperienced, she is an intelligent businesswoman who has read her fair share of literature, and it doesn't take long for her to acknowledge that she's fallen head over heels in love with you.

It is the sensation of your cold fingers cupping her cheeks that jolts the female out of her muddled thoughts, and you can't help but grin when astonishment appears on her lovely face. The parlour is quiet, and you take it as an opportunity--it is you who takes the initiative in expressing your deep affection for her, affectionately calling her your muse-- and you are rewarded with those usually mischievous blood-red eyes growing wide and blush across your companion's cheeks. You can't fight the grin on your visage, as you had successfully rendered the impish funeral director speechless.

To the public, you were an eccentric but affable individual who had a talent for making beautiful and innovative items under the tutelage of your mentor; A person who takes delight in living life to the fullest all the while carrying out your duties earnestly. But to Hu Tao, She had been drawn to you ever since you had met along the busy streets of Liyue. Now with you becoming an important figure in her already exciting life, she can't help but look forward to spending time with you every day.

What are these? Oh, they're flyers. And If you look over there...

╰ ☆☆☆☆╮

[mallowstep]

When I think of Hestia, I more often than not think of her role as the link between men and the Olympians and her privileged position in receiving both the first and last offerings in any rite, both civic and domestic. I'm curious if that aspect of her played any part in picking the association for the title or if it was mostly/exclusively about the domestic/protrectress of hearth and home aspect of her divinity.

it's about a lot. it's about.

actually. there wasn't a Specific quote on my mind, but this quote is what like. this is what i was thinking of.

not with the thought that I shall be saved, but to make sure that my slayers will involve themselves in an act of impiety against the gods

i just. i dunno. hestia as a peaceful figure but also a protective one.

hestia is an interesting figure: she is revered; she is barely mentioned. she is honoured with every sacrifice (not just those made to her); her temples are a rarity.

and what cemented why i wanted to use her was this:

no ancient source or myth describes such a surrender

which is in reference to her and dionysus. like i saw THAT and i thought of stonefur and mistyfoot and [you know The Thing] and went OH DAMN THAT'S IT WE'RE USING HESTIA BABY.

there's an element of...riverclan's leader as divine, their mate a connection between them and the clan. their deputy is...

their deputy is of the clan, yeah? but the deputy is on patrols and hunting. their deputy is of the warriors. their mate is their connection to kits and queens and elders. and i don't think i have to explain how Highly those groups are valued.

but. there is Specificity here wrt stonefur.

hestia as the goddess of the hearth has been on my mind, because i Wanted to make a connection to the hearth, but it took me stupidly long to go, "i want to connect to hearth because i want to connect to hestia."

this is Just Slightly Unfair to everyone else, but when it comes to hearth and home and:

hestia does not choose her position, she is given it. admittedly, she is given it for Exactly The Opposite reason that stonefur is, but still: i think hestia conjures up a specific image, but it...the fact that she is given her position feels very Connected.

i am Not a hellenistic scholar or Anything close to it and i won't pretend to be. i'd like to think i have a slightly stronger base of knowledge than your Standard greek mythology kid, in that i was obsessed with ancient cultures as a whole and therefore don't have the "greek mythology untethered from their society" problem, but still, not an expert and shan't pretend to be.

that all said, as i understand her, hestia wouldn't Work in riverclan's mythology. the position of keeper comes from amber, river's first mate and dawn's mother. amber is a very maternal cat, there's a lot, there are like specific funeral rites for keepers who die as keeper? did i like. i haven't said that to anyone, have i? no i haven't. yeah there are it has to do with amber anyway. on topic.

hestia wouldn't work and stonefur shouldn't work and i drew a Connection to them. right because: well. yeah. hopefully You're picking it up here lmao sorry to everyone else. i love y'all but sometimes i do in fact keep plot threads close to my chest.

anyway.

but also the keeper organizes a lot of holidays. they're...not. there's not like a Thing about when they eat but unless they're like. nursing kits. their whole thing is being responsible for camp and so forth so. they're not going to eat until elders and queens have eaten.

(which, fun fact, is not actually a rule for anyone but apprentices! in hard seasons, no warrior would be foolish enough to take prey from those who needed it. but in warmer seasons, if there's no concern of prey shortage? they wouldn't think twice about taking something off the pile.)

buuuut. after preparations have been made, the keeper can just...enjoy the holiday. they have no Specific role to fill during most of them, and everyone is in camp so like. they get the day off basically lmao. right like. someone else can manage bickering apprentices for a day.

and yeah, on those days, they eat first. well maybe not first. but. metaphorically first. like okay kits might get hungry or if it's a hard time on a holiday and they don't actually have enough prey and so on but. the Idea of it is there.

(greenleaf in particular is a good chance for local Been Sleeping Outside The Nest Since Leaffall for having a Lot of Audacity hailstar to make things up to echomist by being Doting.)

uh. but we're talking about titles.

while her role as a goddess is important: if she wasn't a goddess of the hearth, the whole title would fall apart, the title is "in offering to hestia" rather than like. something directly from her. "hestia, the bearer of good" or something. (*the bearer of good might be in reference to apollo BUT it does seem to fit with how hestia is usually described so.)

because. what is stonefur doing but continually offering up more and more of himself to riverclan? it starts with a promise every warrior makes. and then a choice he'd make for her, for them, without thinking. and then a choice they make together, because of course they do it together.

and then he doesn't have a choice.

It means when Crookedstar dies, whatever parts of Stonefur still belong to himself are given to RiverClan.

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Actually for me it's pretty weird that the most popular ship in Free! is Makoharu. I mean, they give me like zero romantic vibes, if not Rinharu I would've definitely shipped Sourin. It's the main reason I hated Sousuke when I watched 2nd season for the first time - I saw him as a threat for Rinharu (now I just don't like him that much, but I decided to let Rin has his best friend, lol). Maybe it's just me loving rivals to lovers :)

Well.. for me Free! was never that kind of anime where there are other ships, but honestly after several years of watching anime and lately discovering that people ship Wei Wuxian with Jiang Cheng I kinda lost my faith in people lol And yes, I also truly don’t get those ships, where there are zero romantic vibes, but I got used to seeing this already.

I think I’ve talked about Makoharu only once, I usually don’t do it cause as a ship it’s so illogical to me that I just don’t see the point of wasting time on this lol I feel like it’s gonna be long answer so I’ll split it and after “***” I’ll talk about my bro-rinharu-shipper Sousuke.

I’m not gonna throw a debate if it’s the most popular ship or not, but I just want to say that I don’t think that it's really called shipping Makoto and Haru, since firstly, let’s talk about Makoto as a character (which is the main problem in this whole thing tbh) cause from what I saw the Makoto the MH fandom created has nothing to do with the real Makoto. Like the dude is scared of dogs, ghosts, bees, water and I forgot what else; covers his eyes when he sees anyone even in swim trunks and gets embarrassed easier than a nun (apparently you can’t even unbutton the collar of your freaking jacket!!!!!!!!!!! oh lord!!!!!!); crumbles under everyone in this anime including Hiyori and can’t even talk back. 

And suddenly like half of this fandom thinks that Makoto is a dominant top apparently. We seriously laughed our asses off seeing that, I mean even my mom (who’s a teacher btw). I’m like... I have a sister who’s majored in psychology and I myself in literature (like I seriously promise we ain’t stupid) and we just seriously don’t understand.. In what Tarzan’s ass does he suit this description? Dude can’t even answer properly while being offended. Like maybe they like Makoto’s twin brother? Because real Makoto does not have any dangerous dark side, seriously, this ain’t “8 dogs of the east” lmao.

I appreciate their friendship at times, but I never was a fan of him, because I don’t really like people who treat everyone equally (friends and strangers) and think that some asshole deserves as much love as the closest friend. I just don’t understand this life position and don’t like those “world peace” guys anyway. I mean, that fish died moment in the books was when my brain died honestly. Like I get it, dude is sensitive, but... seriously?

And for me being kind is not really a personality. I mean, hell, sometimes it’s no good to be kind. There is a fine line between being kind and being a mop you know.

And sometimes his behavior is really cringy to me. Like during the funeral and during Haru passing out in the book and during many things that are very serious. I just don’t think he’s the person you can rely on at times. I mean at first I thought he’s a steady shoulder, but somehow in all serious situations he doesn’t do anything useful.

Like I might be in the minority here, but to me when you know very well that you panic in the ocean you don’t go there trying to save somebody, it’s not brave, it’s just plain stupid (like it’s not like the tent was far, it was fucking next to him, all he had to do is wake up a pro) so by the end we had to rescue two instead of one, just because he’s dumb af.

He also panics a lot which I really hate on people. I’m sorry but like panicking ppl are the only worst. It reminds me of one of my life situation when my sister was badly hurt and we needed to keep our heads cool to act quickly and do what was necessary asap. And I’ve seen ppl behave like Makoto in situations like this and man it’s seriously no fun, it’s annoying. Like when you need to help somebody and someone panics beside you it pisses you off. And he does it even in little things like when he yelled Haru in the ear while driving JUST BECAUSE A CAR IN FRONT OF THEM BRAKED I mean omfg I would seriously yell “shut the fuck up, you pussy!”

And it all honestly keeps getting worse and worse like the way he’s written, his behavior just buffles me so much. Makoto in s3 just murdered me tbh. Like he didn’t help with anything, he didn’t bring anything to the plot, you can just erase him, he only sat there anyways. And the way they pulled his “dream” out of his ass was just a second-hand embarrassment tbh. And he’s not even Haru’s emotional support anymore. He’s just... I don’t get it. There were literally scenes where he was third-wheeling or just forced into that looked laughable. 

Which brings me to the second point. From what I saw many of Makoharu fans are mostly Makoto fans, so they just want what’s good for him, and since he has no life goals whatsoever (like after he dropped his “I dream of making children like swimming” thingy like a hot potato and was like “training children.. but look at Rin and Haru” I really lost my last marbles watching him) they apparently don’t care for what Haru’s dream is and that he said openly that he wants a future with Rin.

Like I get that everyone has their tastes, but like what.. two people who are crazy about each other since twelve and blossomed a dream of having a future together and the thought of being with each other got them through and they finally have what they wanted.. this is not a trend anymore? Mutual romantic love is not a trend anymore? Like I even without novelization can see that (and I quote Rin word for word here) that “every time he sees Haru his heart beats so fast he can’t calm down” and quote “Haru sees Rin and he’s shaking, he closes his eyes desperately trying get rid of the image, but the pain in his chest doesn’t go away”.

I am personally very happy that Rinharu are finally together and will be doing what they wanted in their life by each other’s side, cause they’ve been dreaming about it for too long, they’ve been thinking about it for  years. So not wanting them to have that is very weird for me. And the argument that Makoto somehow better than Rin for Haru is so invalid, I always laugh. I guess it depends on what you want for yourself. But honestly like you guys better find someone who make you want to reach for the stars and make you heart skip a bit everytime you see him.

So I as a huge fan of Haru want my boy to fly and now I have all the canon proof for those who were blind that Rin is the only one (been said) who makes him feel that way. So all those anons who kept writing to me how relay with Sosuke, with Rei and what baffled me the most swimming with Ikuya was just as emotional for them can finally shut it (lmao I’m sorry).

***

Now... Sousuke, my bro, the first Rinharu shipper on the village who helped them to get together is a threat? Okay. Well, I actually like s2, there are some dumb episodes but s2 actually to me showed how rinharu relationships are different from anyone else. There are literally two whole episodes and several scenes of how the bROMANCE prevails over BROmance.

Sousuke and Rin have typical brothers relationship. From their secret handshakes “parent trap” style to the fact that they draw them exactly the same with his real brother. I mean I don’t know if anyone noticed, but in 3x11 they drew Sousuke doing the exact same teasing move with Rin, that his older brother did to him in 3x01, and it’s definitely not a coincidence. Which means he treats him like his little bro, and not just that. I have lots of proof.

You know, I had a friend back at university who had an older brother who she was very close with and she kept telling me about how he kept testing her boyfriends if they’re good enough... I mean Sousuke was doing it with Haru since Rin has told him that he has found his one and only. And it never ever looked like he was possessive of Rin and was like “he’s mine”, it was always like “he’s yours so make sure you make him happy you loser”, he even stalked Haru to see if he still swims alright which is really funny (like okay dad), so by the end of the season when Rin lovingly looks at Haru and says it was all worth it, Sousuke looks very content like he was sure that they’re all good now.

And that moment like in Yakusoku where Rin dropped Sousuke as soon as he saw Haru, I honestly don’t think it’s the kind of jealousy people think it is. It’s like if I asked my sister “do u want to see the new avengers movie” and she’d answer “sorry, I already promised to go with my boyfriend” (not that this would ever happen, but let’s imagine that she found herself her nanase) I would be fucking upset too, but I would kinda get it (if it’s a love of her life I mean). Or like literally imagine you lived with your best friend for years and suddenly she wants to move in with he boo. I mean it happens sometimes. But it’s not the jealousy really, he’s just sad because he knows that he needs to let Rin go and he won’t spend as much time with him as he did before. Sousuke knows how much Rin loves Haru, plus after he saw that Haru is as good as Rin told him, he started to like him himself so he was worried about both of them. 

And I love Sousuke, he’s our godmother. I’d rather have him on the international team than Ikuya but he sadly he doesn’t swim breaststroke or back and we only have one butterfly and one freestyle spot xD

I’m sincerely saying as a person with two siblings that I really don’t see it. It’s just there’s a huge difference between brothers and lovers. And you can’t call Harurin bros. It’s just laughable. Even if you haven’t read anything and just watched the anime.

I mean I think it’s easier to see if you try to imagine Haru in Sousuke’s place in any Sourin scene and see how it would’ve went then. Like do you remember when Sousuke asked for cola and Rin went to get one and there was only one can left so they rock-paper-scissored it and Rin won and drank it?

Now imagine if Haru was there in Sousuke’s place. I can tell you 100% that Rin would’ve just given him the can. And then he would’ve looked at him with that face he makes when he’s content just by watching Haru eat, you know.

I mean it just how I see it. And there are a lot of comparable scenes in s2 that bring me lots of evil joy, but I won’t tell lmao.

But as I said before to me there’s a huge difference between bromances and bromances. So I mostly don’t get most of these ships. I don’t understand anything in this world apparently lol but I only see Rinharu since the first time I’ve watched it, and then I’ve read everything and realized that I’m right, so I’m ok with all this xD 

[prqltothesql]

Been feeling really really depressed recently. Like REALLY depressed since my birthday. So here’s what my 2022 has been like

- Started an indoor drumline at the brand new HS that I’m teaching at. We did a show of Spider-Man music from the Spider-Man PS4 game, the Into the Spider-Verse movie and Avengers. We did standstill so it was low-commitment, low importance, but they had an undefeated season (of two shows lmao) and the kids did great. - Taught Middletown’s pit and wrote their show which was in dedication to Kevin, who passed in July 2021. We did Jupiter, Schism, Wish You Were Here and Waiting on the World to Change, which are 4 very different songs but I think I made it work. Kids did great, I met a new tech named Lauren from UD who was super awesome and became one of my closest friends during the season. At Wildwood, while we only finished 5th, we finished 2nd in music, getting 1st overall in music achievement from the only judge on the panel worth a damn. Was my last season after working with them since 2014 and a great way to go out. - Saw Tool, Dream Theater and John Petrucci live in concert this year, as well as seeing 3 wrestling shows; NJPW, AEW and WWE. - Saw The Batman, Doctor Strange 2, Jurassic World: Dominion, Thor: Love and Thunder, Rogue One IN IMAX!, Clerks III, Black Panther 2 - My dad died this year. I’ve been wrestling hard with my grief all year and it’s hitting really hard as we get to my birthday, Christmas and the New Year, all things that were extremely important to my dad and us as a family. A few weeks before he died, he started doing a bunch of stuff around here. Fixing my ceiling. Putting up floor jacks in the basement, fixing things, offering to buy me things I wanted. It was very weird, like he knew he was gonna die and didn’t have long. Two days before he died, he had a mini-heart attack. He said he threw up and was sweating and having chest pains, every sign of a heart attack. Yet that same day, he had his friend over to record and was helping him record a song. The day before he died, he woke up feeling great, we ate dinner, he was in an awesome mood, everything was fine, and he woke up the next day, had another heart attack and died. My sister didn’t wake me up cause she didn’t want to leave him alone, even though I was right upstairs and it would have taken just a few seconds. I don’t know if there was anything I could have done, or anything anyone could have done at that point. I never got to say goodbye to him. I never got that chance. I woke up and he was dead. - I planned his funeral and burial, I think I did a good job but didn’t write a eulogy, just gave some haphazard speech that went only a couple of minutes. That still haunts me. I miss him so much and think about him every day. The grief, the regret, the anxiety, the depression, the guilt. It’s not been 5 stages of grief, it’s just been a recurring cycle, ping-ponging back and forth between all of them, never quite hitting acceptance. - After he died, I gained a lot of weight and wasn’t active in the summer to the point where a brisk walk made me short of breath and caused my back to ache. After doing more band, I felt a lot better, but I still haven’t lost any of the weight I put on. - I went and saw a Blue Rocks game with Rachel on Father’s Day, just so we didn’t have to sit at home and refresh social media and see a bunch of stuff about Father’s Day. I went and saw 2 drum corps shows with Drew and it was really really fun just getting to go and be a spectator and talk shit and watch shows. - I met a girl online who lived in Ohio who we talked for 3 months and then she blocked me on everything and ghosted me out of nowhere. So there’s that. - On a whim, I applied for a job teaching the front ensemble at George Mason University. The director is a guy I’ve known since I was in HS, also a Delaware guy. I’ve never taught or marched world class, I’ve only taught HS for a majority of my teaching career. I didn’t think I’d get it, but I applied anyways, interviewed for it and was offered the position. I’ve gone down 6 out of the 8 weekends so far and it’s been a blast but very humbling. I never would have gotten the chance to do this had my dad been alive. He hated me doing band, and now with me driving down on the weekends and being gone all weekend, stranding my sister here by herself, he’d have lost it and it would have been miserable. But instead these weekends are like little adventures for me, and I’m learning so much and getting my name out there for possibly other things. It’s a bittersweet thing. - I got COVID. After the first marching band competition of the season, I felt bad, wound up being sick, wound up testing positive for COVID. My sister also got it. I’m vaccinated, my sister is not, but it both hit us equally as hard. That was really rough. - Odessa went to ACCs as a competing unit for the first time this year and it was at Hersheypark Stadium, so getting to take this little band to such a big time place was awesome, and we finished 3rd in percussion and 3rd in colorguard, which was huge. Last year was weird because I was still dealing with strife with my dad about teaching again, I was double dipping at Middletown because I was loyal to Kevin’s memory and Garrett, and Odessa was only doing a backing-track-led Festival class show. And Middletown had a core of seniors in the drumline. So it was hard splitting my time. But this year, committed only to teaching one school, it was a lot better. And I enjoy working with Odessa because the kids are brand new and only learning what I’m teaching them, so I can drill in fundamentals. I don’t have to break bad habits or change culture. I’m creating the culture, I’m creating the technique program. It’s been super fun. - I’m still at my job. We lost our manager back in February and we gained a new one back in August. It’s been rough in that transition as she’s changing the paradigm in our department, but it’s been good. - We lost our second to last dog, Wolfie, back last November. The last remaining dog, my dog Angel, she doesn’t have long either, so I’m dealing with a lot of sadness and anxiety about her, hoping she’s good, trying to keep her health the best I can these last few days, weeks, months she has. Overall, I’m in a decent position in my life. I’m still single, I’m still in the same crappy house, I’m still stuck with my sister. But I’ve made moves, I’ve improved as a teacher, I have two really great jobs lined up teaching and I’m having a blast at both, whether I’m good or having success or nobody likes me or not, it’s been very fulfilling. And I’ve done a lot of cool stuff and despite the soul-crushing sadness of losing my dad that has taken hold of in my heart, a lot more opportunities to live life and have fun have opened up for me and Rachel and it’s been interesting learning how to live in this new life.

[written-s0ul]

A Good Time (2/4)

SUMMARY. College AU. Bucky Barnes x F!Reader. As a joke, your friends wrote your phone number on a graffiti wall for anyone who “wants to have a good time.” You didn’t expect someone to call. But someone did.

WARNINGS. Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader. Cursing / swearing. Don’t call any numbers on graffiti walls, kids!

WORD COUNT. 1.3k

AUTHOR’S NOTES. I hope I wrote Bucky well. And have I told you guys how much I enjoy writing Bucky and Sam’s frenemy-ship? It’s so much fun. As always, I welcome and appreciate your feedback!

#1 // #2: you are here // #3 // #4

“What’s with that face, Barnes?” Sam said, glancing at him at the corner of his eye, with one edge of his lips perked up.

He brought his glare down to the paper cup in his hand, teeth gritted. “I would be studying right now, if it weren’t for you.”

“You are studying right now,” he said, lifting his cup to his lips. “You’re learning that I ain’t ever gonna get your coffee for you.”

Bucky swiveled to face him, jaw locked and eyes hard. The coffee in his cup sloshed at the abrupt and rapid movement, long strands of his hair swaying. “Just once, Wilson. It wouldn’t hurt to do me a favor. Just. Once.”

“I already did you favor,” Sam said, turning left into a playground. The smooth gravel beneath his shoes crunched, soft, at every jolly step. “I got you outside. During the day.” He gestured to their surroundings, the tender gaze of the morning sun breathing life into the otherwise deserted, rusting playground. “After nearly a week of – being a vampire. Not that you aren’t one already.”

Throwing him a look, Bucky pushed his cap further down his face, shoving a hand into the pocket of his jacket. “Locking myself in helps me focus.”

Sam scoffed into his coffee, just before tipping it into his lips for a sip and lowering it to his chest. “You need to go out, man. Go out and have fun. I’d go with you, but–” he said, shrugging an indifferent shoulder. “I don’t like you.”

Bucky huffed, unimpressed. He rubbed a hand across his face, with a tired kind of exasperation, and shrugged a shoulder. “Well, Steve and I–”

“Steve has a date tonight,” Sam said, cocking a brow at him like your BFF can’t save you now.

He winced, face scrunching. A memory surfaced in his mind, that of Steve recounting of how he finally asked out the girl he liked like a shy schoolboy, complete with pinked cheeks, awkward storytelling and delighted, blue eyes. They then celebrated his sudden surge of balls with a late-night pizza delivery. Damn, Bucky thought, how could he forget that? He paid for that pizza.

Beside him, Sam was shaking his head, staring at his coffee with twisted lips, as though tasting something sour. “No idea why he’s going for the niece of one of his professors, but – it’s his funeral.”

Both of them stepped into the veranda, Sam’s gaze sweeping across the graffiti, lazy and casual. But upon spotting a phone number on the wall, he froze, brows furrowed. Approaching it, he stepped across Bucky’s path.

Stumbling back in surprise, Bucky gripped on his coffee cup tighter and looked up, ready to shoot his friend daggers with his eyes, but paused at seeing the gleeful smile on Sam’s face, and the raised finger pointing to a phone number on the wall, with words right above it: “If you want to have a good time, call …”

Sam wiggled his brows. Bucky’s face fell. “No.”

“It’s much better than the other ones!” Sam said, gesturing to other phone numbers written around them: want weed??; 29F looking 4 s3x; free BJs!! When Bucky’s wrinkled nose reached him, he arched a brow. “You choose.”

“How about I choose none of them?”

“Sure, but you’d be a boring old man in your entire boring, old man life,” he said, deadpanned. “Just because you didn’t, for once, take a chance.” He shook his head, frustrated. “C’mon, Barnes, it wouldn’t hurt.”

A crease appeared between Bucky’s knitted brows. “What if it isn’t safe?”

With one hand, Sam gestured to the words above the number. “It’s spelled correctly, with proper grammar and punctuation, in decent handwriting. And it has nothing about sex! Plus–” He pointed to the 100% worth it beneath the number, raising a brow. “That says a lot.”

They stared at each other, one urging and the other glaring, until finally, Bucky heaved out a sigh and pulled out his phone from the back pocket of his jeans, cursing under his breath. A bright grin lit up Sam’s face, brilliant and triumphant.

“If I get stalked, Wilson–”

“Then you’ll have a reason to throw that battered old thing away,” he said, nodding at the ancient phone.

Once the number was in, Bucky stared at it. His heart bounded in his chest; blood thrumming loud and fast in his ears, like the crashing fall of a gushing river from a cliff. He blamed the coffee for this.

And Sam. Yeah, Sam too.

His thumb floated above the bright, green call button, reluctant to press down –

“C’mon!”

A pull on his hand, and the phone slipped out and into Sam’s grip. Bucky reached over, ready to grab it from him, but by then, it was back in his own hand, vibrating with every ring. He looked at him, eyes wide – what the hell?

“Put it on your ear!” Sam said, hand flailing, urgent and wild.

“What the–” Bucky obliged, shuffling back with eyes as big as wall clocks. He tried to wave his arms around, but with the phone and the coffee in his hands, he was restricted to just flapping his elbows like a panicking chicken. “What the hell am I going to say when–”

Click. “Hello?”

He froze.

Sam raised his brows, questioning. “Someone answered?” he asked, voice hushed. Bucky nodded, resembling a mute deer caught by the headlights of a car. Sam looked at him like what are you waiting for? “Say something!”

“Hello?” the female voice on the other line said, soft with confusion. “Hellooo?”

“Uh, um – hi, hi there,” Bucky said, finding his gravelly voice after a few, thick swallows. “Is this the one to call, when I want to … have a good time?”

A beat of stunned silence. Then, low, exasperated murmurs, incomprehensible to Bucky’s ears. “Oh my god, I cannot believe – um, no. No, this isn’t the one to call if you want to have a good time. In fact, please – don’t call this number. Ever.”

He drew his brows together, forehead wrinkling. “I–” Click.

“Well?” Sam said, lifting an open palm, when Bucky brought the phone down, blinking. “What’d they say?”

He glanced at him, surprised, as though just remembering his presence. “It was a girl,” he said, pocketing the phone. “She said to never call her again.”

“Damn,” he said, corners of his lips dropping. “Hardly a word and you’re already rejected.” He turned around, and stepped out of the veranda, Bucky trailing behind him, with features scrunched up in thought, the voice still in his head. It was a pleasant voice, if it wasn’t so annoyed. Sounded like she didn’t even want for her number to be on that wall. What could have happened?

He lifted his coffee to his lips, the now cold liquid soothing against his tongue, seared earlier when he, in his eagerness for caffeine, completely forgot that it was sizzling. At the corner of his eye, he caught the curling movement of Sam’s now slumped shoulders. With a dejected sigh, his previous energy slipping out of him, Sam’s posture almost seemed deflated.

Bucky frowned. Why would this guy, of all people, be disappointed that he – Bucky, his ever-so-hated roommate – doesn’t get to have fun? Then it hit him. Steve. He looked at Sam, brows furrowed with suspicion. “Did Steve ask you to–”

“Ten bucks, man,” he said, nodding, lips pressed together in firm disappointment. “I was almost ten bucks richer.”

Bucky breathed out a resigned sigh, shaking his head. He may not be going out to have a good time tonight, but at least Sam wasn’t going to get anything out of it. Yeah, that was much better. Almost.

AUTHOR’S NOTES. I love the dynamic of these too, lmao. The next parts will be posted this weekend. (: Hope you guys enjoyed!

TAGGING. (Let me know if you want to be tagged to the story or permanently!) @courtneychicken @ailynalonso15 @monsis-world @cami23593 @redqueen1221 @cinthias-corner @shortiiqt16 @inside-lizzys-head @riddikuluslyemily @boyzines @ishipmybed @jorddeenn @fabulousfrankiefurball @gingerstarlight

[septemberpoems]

bella watches teen wolf 6x13 and 6x14

but before we do, a few metaish highlights from 11 and 12 since I watched them while internetless:

11

I wonder if the mass of crows with jennifer and the mass of rats now are similar

there’s this creaking sound in the background sometimes that was present in 3a, I believe, but I’ll have to look it up 

they do this thing where you can hear the heartbeats of the people speaking sometimes (I have a stiles meta about it only showing up during the nogitsune) but can’t find it atm

what drew derek to north carolina? note to self

12

ms “trust me, I’m a guidance counselor” needs some lessons in undercover ops, gathering intel and counterintelligence bc she's about as smooth as sandpaper

I still ship marrish like a motherfucker and I think they’d be good for eachother

I also like malia and scott, at least in theory

“what’s it gonna take for you to explode liam“ I have read at least 250 fanfics that have started like this

my five years spent not trusting dr fenris worth shit unfortunately paid off on this day

it’s gonna be interesting to see what people are afraid of, if it exposes their fears. 

The whole “it feeds on fear” and nogitsune!stiles going “I feed on what you feel” and counting off the coyotes and the foxes and the ravens- I think this might be the raven. It would also make sense to stick it in the hunt, in that case.

13

I’m guessing either satomi’s pack shared the tunnels with the hales or that they simply knew where they were

how are they not able to smell gerard

fucking sun tzu again. I guess I’m reading a book this weekend.

I’m gonna kill gerard. I’m gonna find him and kill him dead.

why is it always biology class with melissa and chris nowadays

like I want to like this chick but I fucking hate her at the same time

I want to hate this kid and I do fucking hate him

I genuinely want to punch him in the mouth

NVM LET ME STAB HIM INSTEAD

kinda regretting you didn’t just fucking kill gerard now, didn’t you

maaaamaaaa, just stabbed a guuuuuy, put a pen into his hand, outed a shifter, now I’m (hopefully) dead

I feel s1 and s2 derek’s justified rage flow through me

I’m oddly okay with melissa and chris with the way they’re doing it actually. if they’d gone into “I’m your stepdad”-territory it would have been bad but the whole “maybe we’ll call” thing works

WHAT THE SHIT

14

genuinely thought she was allison for a second

she’s my new favourite and if she dies I will fuck shit up

THIS IS WHY THE US NEEDS MORE RIGOROUS TESTS BEFORE COP SCHOOL

look. I've paused and read half of the art of war now and honestly, their best hope right now is probably malia, oddly enough. she may not be military or a genius or a very good leader but she’s good with making hard decisions and this is probably the first time I feel like her additions make sense in more than a grr I’m a coyote-kinda way

LMAO THANK YOU LYDIA

I can’t wait to see this little kid get stabbed in the fucking eye

I hope coach makes him feel worthless first

I want to make it very, very clear that gerard using a young woman employed at the high school to eradicate all supernatural beings in beacon hills is a direct fucking parallel to kate and I want to vomit

OH SHIT QUEEN LYDIA 

NOW THE MORNING NEWS: NEWBIE HUNTER CHALLENGES LITERAL GODDESS OF WAR AND DEATH AND EXPECTS TO SURVIVE. FUNERAL DETAILS AT TWELVE.

“why do you only show up when there’s bad news“ lmao

WHAT KIND OF SHIT TEACHER

“ah, great“ in which noah is me and me is noah

wow this bitch is going to die an early death

HOPEFULLY SHE TAKES THIS PIECE OF SHIT KID WITH HER

lmao the first rule of anything: arrogance gets you killed faster than anything else. 

HAH someone please tell her who it was, just to see her squirm

LYDIA IN A LEATHER JACKET I. AM. SO. GAY.

SEE THE LIGHTS FLICKER WHEN IT’S IN THERE. I BET MY BARBIE COLLECTION IT WAS IN THE VET CLINIC WHEN ISAAC NEARLY LOST IT IN THE BATHTUB. I also think the flickering is a sign of a trickster, not necessarily just the nogitsune

BLESS YOU COACH. I FUCKING LOVE YOU.

what the hell is that thing? the ghost of peter hale’s past?

YESSS SHE’S ALIVE

but who is she

my wife but still

quinn? that’s quinn? NICE

[junker-town]

The 101 best moments of the 2016-17 NBA season

The long NBA season produced so many incredible moments. Here are our favorites.

The 2016-17 NBA season ends on Wednesday. Well, the regular season ends. The playoffs begin on Saturday. We tend to remember seasons by what happens in the postseason, even when the 82 are filled with surprise and wonder.

This year we decided to celebrate the regular season at its close, before the playoffs wash our brains with new achievements. We’re taking a moment to acknowledge the amazing things that happened over the last six months before we devour and catalog what happens over the next two.

These moments are listed in NO PARTICULAR ORDER, and we apologize if your favorite moment (or team) isn’t represented. Please share those moments in the comments! We’re sure we missed some. With 1,230 games to recall — not including Wednesday’s finales — things are bound to fall through the cracks.

But we are confident these 101 unforgettable moments are worth remembering. They are sorted into convenient (and sometimes overlapping) categories and numbered. We apologize to your phones and hope you enjoy.

DAGGERS

Let’s open at the close with the most memorable daggers of the year.

1. James Harden’s sprinting game-winner

Harden is an MVP favorite, so he leads the list. This slaloming full-court, one-man fast break sealed a win for the Rockets ... whether Nene held a Nugget or not.

2. Serge Ibaka’s no-look, game-tying bank shot

You’ll never see a weirder clutch shot than Ibaka putting it off the glass without looking, to send it to overtime.

3. Giannis Antetokounmpo’s buzzer-beater at Madison Square Garden

The only thing better than The Greek Freak’s shot is Carmelo Anthony’s reaction to it.

4. Kawhi Leonard’s seven-second MVP case

Kawhi buried a clutch jumper and then smothered James Harden on the other end to seal a win for the Spurs. This had people speaking in tongues and denouncing the entirety of Houston.

5. Kyrie Irving’s game-winner on Christmas Day

After hitting the dagger that gave Cleveland its first championship in decades last June, Kyrie followed it up with a turnaround fadeaway over Klay Thompson to beat the Warriors on Christmas. Golden State has nightmares about Uncle Drew.

6. Dion Waiters beats the Warriors

The best dagger of the year, and not just because of the shot. It’s the triumphant pose that really sells it. Business is booming on Waiters Island.

GOOSEBUMPS

We experienced some special emotional moments together this season.

7. The Paul Pierce tribute in Boston

The Truth is playing his 18th and final season in the NBA. There hasn’t been too much pomp ... except in Boston, where Pierce received an appropriate hero’s send-off.

8. The Roots' Basketball History Musical and All-Star intros

This was a damn cool moment that was uniquely NBA in every way.

9. Joel Embiid celebrates T.J. McConnell's buzzer-beater

#NBAVote Joel Embiid http://pic.twitter.com/bNzIpcAub7

— Christian Crosby (@ChristianCrosby) January 12, 2017

There hasn’t been a whole lot for the 76ers to celebrate in the past few years. So to see Embiid’s ecstasy after McConnell beat the Knicks was refreshing and heart-warming. And it gave us one of the greatest photos ever.

10. Coaches speak out

There isn’t really a good category for this one, but it was rather surreal and, for the majority of NBA fans, refreshing. It helped define the league, given the silence of management in other major American sports. Here’s Paul Flannery’s Shootaround on coaches speaking up in the wake of Nov. 8.

11. DeMarcus Cousins and Joel Embiid become BFFs

In a season rife with beef, two talented big men found friendship and mutual respect. There is hope for America.

12. Russell Westbrook and Kevin Durant share one more alley-oop

One of the dominating storylines at the All-Star Game was the opportunity for Durant and Westbrook to reunite on the West team. Would Steve Kerr play them together? (Yes, of course.) Would they acknowledge each other? Would Westbrook feed Durant for a transition alley-oop? He did, and the world reacted like the Berlin Wall fell. The reaction from the other West All-Stars was worth the price of admission.

13. Drake + Doris

The Raptors annual Drake Night turned into an evening of Canada’s favorite son wooing ESPN’s star broadcaster Doris Burke. It culminated in Drake asking DoBu to dinner on live television and Burke later accepting on Twitter. Basketball and romance — all in a night’s work for the Toronto Raptors.

14. Tim Duncan’s jersey retirement ceremony

Everything good about the Spurs is on display here.

15. TNT’s emotional Craig Sager tribute

The world lost a bit of color in December when Craig Sager died after a years-long fight with leukemia. TNT paid tribute to the beloved sideline reporter with a five-minute eulogy narrated by Ernie Johnson.

16. The Sager charity shootout

Two months later, on All-Star Saturday, the NBA put together a special moment starring DJ Khaled, Steph Curry, Candace Parker, Reggie Miller, and others. The purpose: raise $500,000 for the Sager Strong Foundation. Curry couldn’t hit a halfcourt shot in street clothes, so to punctuate the moment, Shaq lifted up Sager’s youngest son for an assisted finger roll.

WTF

The NBA stays weird. Note that the LMAO category has plenty of items that could double in this category.

17. The Warriors’ bizzaro groundbreaking ceremony

Golden State officially began work on its new arena in San Francisco in January. The Warriors don’t do anything boring these days. So of course, the ceremony featured dancing construction workers and excavator ballet. YES, EXCAVATOR BALLET.

THE CRANES ARE DOING A SYNCHRONIZED DANCE WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON http://pic.twitter.com/VfbbcsFGx5

— Courtney Cronin (@CourtneyRCronin) January 17, 2017

18. Lance Stephenson returns to Indiana

The Pacers had a blasé season ... until Lance Stephenson blew into town in March. In his first game back in Indianapolis, he led a stirring comeback, insulted the Raptors with a garbage time layup, acted like he had no clue why they were so mad, and earned Paul George’s highest praise. It was better than MJ in the 4-5.

19. The great NBA potato mystery

In March, various NBA players began receiving personalized potatoes in the mail. Of course, it was viral marketing. For two days there, you had internet writers going full Rust Cohle.

20. The NBA’s Flat Earth Society

Just before All-Star Weekend, Richard Jefferson and Channing Frye revealed on their podcast (which was a revelation in itself) that Kyrie Irving believes the Earth is flat. Most of All-Star Weekend, thus, was filled with serious questions about Kyrie’s beliefs — Adam Silver even had to respond to it during a press conference! — and jokes at Irving’s expense. Shaq later pranked everyone by claiming he too believes the world is flat.

BEEF

If there was one constant this season, it was BEEF. Everyone’s so mad at each other all of a sudden.

Mark D. Smith-USA TODAY Sports

21. Russell Westbrook vs. Zaza Pachulia 22. Kevin Durant vs. Andre Roberson 23. Steph Curry vs. Russell Westbrook and Semaj Christon

Let’s get the NBA’s biggest running beef out of the way with these three critical moments. When the Thunder visited Golden State in January, Zaza put Westbrook on his tail and the OKC star vowed retribution. In Durant’s highly anticipated return to Oklahoma City, ex-teammate Roberson got into his face and butted heads with him. Durant missed the second game in OKC due to injury, so Semaj Christon and eventually Westbrook mixed it up with Curry. I’m starting to think there’s some bad blood here.

24. Serge Ibaka vs. Robin Lopez

Ibaka and Lopez almost traded punches in a late-season battle between the Raptors and their arch-rival Bulls. Luckily, both whiffed and so each were only suspended a game. This could have been much more notorious.

25. Jusuf Nurkic vs. the Nuggets

Denver traded the Bosnian Beast to Portland — its closest rival for the No. 8 seed in the West — and Nurkic immediately became an All-Star-caliber player. He groaned at his diminished role with the Nuggets, so when the Blazers freed him, he made sure to remind Denver what it was missing. At the conclusion of his epic revenge game against the Nuggets in March, he wished his old team a “happy summer.” Savage.

26. Charles Oakley vs. the Knicks

Knicks owner James Dolan had Knicks legend Oakley booted from a game, arrested, and banned from Madison Square Garden over some personal drama between the two. The entirety of Western civilization took Oak’s side; eventually, the league tapped Michael Freaking Jordan to broker a cease fire.

27. C.J. McCollum vs. Chandler Parsons

We hit the lottery by not signing you https://t.co/eSiBaNT061

— CJ McCollum (@CJMcCollum) January 28, 2017

These dudes had such a petty social media fight that the league had to send a memo to teams telling everyone to chill their Twitter fingers.

28. JaVale McGee vs. Shaq

There’s actually nothing funny about this one. The Warriors and both dudes’ moms got involved. This was definitely a season in which beef went a little too far.

29. LeBron vs. Charles Barkley

LeBron had enough of Chuck’s chatter and produced the research to bear. He brought up Barkley spitting on a kid and throwing a dude through a window! So of course, Chuck announced that the feud was over. YEAH it is, buddy. It’s over.

30. LeBron vs. LaVar Ball

Oh, God. LaVar Ball. LaVar talked about how Lil’ Bronny won’t ever measure up to his dad because NBA stars can’t raise talent like LaVar did. Big Bron snapped back. This is the closest he’s ever been to old-man status and it’s just great.

31. DeMarcus Cousins vs. Meyers Leonard

Now this is a great beef. Inexplicable, even to the parties involved.

32. Funeral Game

Speaking of inexplicable, Wizards vs. Celtics came out of nowhere to become the fiercest team rivalry in the league. John Wall did not appreciate getting booped by Jae Crowder, and next thing you know, the Wizards are wearing all black to a game in January to signify the Celtics’ “funeral.” Needlessly intense, like all good NBA beefs should be.

DRAMA

A close cousin of BEEF is Drama, from the courtroom to the locker room.

33. Palace intrigue in Lakerland

Jeanie Buss hired Magic Johnson, fired her brother ... and then her brother tried in hilariously inept fashion to replace her as the controlling owner of the Lakers. She sued, her brother disappeared, and all is now well in Lakerland. What a weird family.

34. The night Boogie got traded

DeMarcus Cousins had a strange All-Star Sunday, playing only two minutes as trade rumors swirled. Immediately after the game, as he faced the media scrum, a Kings PR staffer apparently whispered in his ear that it looked like he was going to be traded. The news broke less than an hour later.

35. Kevin Durant’s return to OKC

We covered the beef involved above, but the scene in Oklahoma City was something else. The cupcake shirts and signs, the chants, the boos.

36. The Bulls’ Instagram saga

Dwyane Wade and Jimmy Butler decided to trash their teammates in the media ... so Rajon Rondo (whose current role in the NBA is apparently to cause havoc wherever he goes) lit them up on Instagram.

DUNKS

Be honest, this is what you came for. Enjoy.

37. Willie Cauley-Stein on the Celtics

38. Terrence Ross 360

Holy cow! Terrence Ross throws down a 360 degree jam http://pic.twitter.com/HbeUfuJoJS

— CSN Northwest (@CSNNW) December 27, 2016

39. Sam Dekker on Enes Kanter

You have to click through for that one because Vine died for our sins. But YO.

40. Andrew Wiggins on JaVale McGee

A better look at Andrew Wiggins' monster dunk! http://pic.twitter.com/OHGPXFDyBV

— NBA (@NBA) November 27, 2016

41. Zach LaVine on Alex Len

Another Vine, so click through. But trust me: Do it.

42. Russell Westbrook dagger dunk on Clint Capela

43. Larry Nance Jr. on Brook Lopez

44. Larry Nance Jr. on David West

Here is the Dunk of the Year by the Dunker of the Year. To my knowledge, Nance has still not apologized to West for his incredible disrespect. This is unacceptable.

LMAO

Here at SB Nation, we like to laugh. (You’ll notice that this is the biggest category.) The NBA came through for us this year.

45. The Lakers thought LeBron was praising D’Angelo Russell (he wasn’t)

When social media goes wrong.

46. SI’s Sam Hinkie 2.0 story

This brilliant Chris Ballard profile fueled two weeks’ worth of Twitter takes. I treasure this story like the beautiful young child it is.

47. Steph Curry and Draymond Green wearing cupcake shirts

After the Warriors bludgeoned the Thunder in Kevin Durant’s aforementioned return to OKC, Curry and Green acquired cupcake T-shirts ... and wore them in the postgame.

48. Michael Jordan trashes the Warriors to their owner’s face

During a meal while NBA owners negotiated a new collective bargaining agreement, the Hornets’ boss, who once won 72 as a player, trashed the Warriors’ empty 73-win record to Golden State owner Joe Lacob’s face because his team didn’t win the ring. MJ never loses.

49. JaVale McGee made Draymond Green-Face blankets

No one has more fun than the Warriors. Speaking of which ...

50. Steph Curry loses Marcin Gortat

Curry won’t be the MVP again, but he has some magical moments.

51. Steph Curry lays down to avoid a poster, fails

One of the funnier subplots at All-Star was Giannis Antetokounmpo playing way harder than anyone else. So when Curry was back to defend a Giannis break, he decided to avoid posterization by literally lying down. Giannis got him on a putback, like, a minute later anyways. Sheesh.

52. Steph Curry slides on the floor after a chest bump

This is my nominee for NBA Meme Material of the Year.

53. Kyle Lowry and DeMar DeRozan on the Jumbrotron

There’s no friendship in the NBA more special than the one between Lowry and DeRozan. This moment captures that perfectly.

54. Epic Warriors jokes hit Jeopardy!

NBA Twitter denizen Loren Chen made it to Jeopardy! and delivered some high-profile meme jokes at the Warriors’ expense.

55. The Cavaliers’ Halloween party

As if the Warriors-Cavs rivalry needed more heat, LeBron had jokes for Golden State at his Halloween party. They have gravestone cookies for Steph Curry and Klay Thompson!

56. Dion Waiters forgets a quote he wanted to share

To be fair, Dion Waiters is too busy HITTING DAGGERS to remember stuff.

57. Shaq tackles his co-workers

When Randy Moss visits Inside the NBA, Shaq takes the opportunity to do what he wants to do every week: tackle Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith.

58. The Spurs retire Matt Bonner’s flannel shirt

Respect.

59. Festus Ezeli’s locker room speech gets shut down

Maybe the funniest scoop of the season from ESPN’s Chris Haynes:

After suffering a [...] loss to Milwaukee, Ezeli, in street clothes, addressed the team in the locker room with a stern speech centered on playing with urgency, sources told ESPN. Then two games later, after a crushing defeat in Memphis, Ezeli once again started giving a team speech, but he was cut short.

McCollum interrupted Ezeli in midsentence and told him that was enough, sources told ESPN. [...] Players were desperately pouring out every ounce of effort trying to change the trajectory of the season, and being lectured by someone who wasn't even playing wasn't received favorably.

60. MUSECAGE

What the hell are we doing here ESPN http://pic.twitter.com/10SHUqOrIv

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) March 26, 2017

Kobe Bryant is getting even weirder in retirement. This is a snip (via @cjzero) from his education puppet show/horror film, which debuted in the middle of the day on ESPN and is intended for children.

61. "Keep Calm Like Kristaps Porzingis"

Latvian music video of the year every year for the rest of Porzingis’ career.

62. LeBron dancing like nobody is watching

... because he thinks that nobody is watching.

63. Mo Speights ethers the Clippers (he's a Clipper)

After a horrific loss to the Warriors, Speights, then brand new to L.A., implored the Clippers to stop being the Clippers.

64. Sweater Mom vs. Gold Suit Man

CHRISTMAS SWEATER MOM VS GOLD SUIT MAN DANCE OFF http://pic.twitter.com/F4WJZibHFh

— the geek freak (@rachaelhoops) November 27, 2016

65. The bonkers Nets vs. Clippers double overtime game

Nothing about this game made sense. Nothing.

66. J.R. Smith mid-possession dap

J.R. Smith stopped playing defense so he could say hello to his friend Jason Terry on the bench. The other team scored.

67. Klay Thompson living the best life

No one enjoys his awesome NBA life more than Klay Thompson, which is odd considering he so often looks grumpy. He enjoyed a mid-interview beer, showed off his paper plane engineering skills during a press conference, and brought his very good dog to work.

68. Obama cracks a J.R. Smith joke

The Cavaliers hustled to visit the White House two days after the election. Once there, No. 44 got in a crack on the Clown Prince of the NBA.

69. Zaza Pachulia’s erotic celebration

Zaza smacks his own butt and dances. Go Warriors.

70. Devin Booker gets ejected but still signs an autograph for a fan

This was overall the chillest ejection ever. Booker gave the ref a thumbs up, said bye to his homies, and signed a card for a fan on his way out.

71. Marc Gasol's billion dollar strut

I want to apologize.... TO ABSOLUTELY NOBODY!#GrindCity http://pic.twitter.com/JN6p8YdV0G

— Marc Gasol (@MarcGasol) November 17, 2016

72. Human Hungry, Hungry Hippos

This apparently existed out there in the world before this year, but the Cavaliers brought it to NBA intermissions and the world was never the same.

73. The Grizzlies’ mascot strips to "Pony"

For your viewing pleasure: @grizz dancing to @Ginuwine's Pony. http://pic.twitter.com/uySCMjagfT

— Memphis Grizzlies (@memgrizz) November 9, 2016

Grizz, the Memphis Grizzlies mascot, stripping to Ginuwine’s “Pony” is squarely in the middle of the Venn diagram that constitutes SB Nation’s wheelhouse. It gets better on every viewing, too.

74. Sam Dekker’s doink

Dekker almost had the Dunk of the Year, but he succeeded in winning Doink of the Year.

75. The Lakers' failed tank job

It’s difficult to understate how hilarious the Lakers’ failed attempt to lose to the 60-win Spurs in the final week of the season was. L.A. played Metta World Peace 17 minutes and still won!

76. Kemba Walker shimmies ... while his shot clanks

Here’s the blooper of the year. Kemba takes the classic Nick-Young-celebrating-a-miss moment and revs it up by giving us a shimmy.

AWE

We all crave moments that take our breath away. Basketball provides.

77. Russell Westbrook's 45-foot nutmeg bounce pass

I mean ... what? What? How? I don’t think I watched a highlight more times than I watched this one in 2016-17.

78. Anthony Davis' record-destroying All-Star fourth quarter

For 55 years, Wilt Chamberlain held the record for most points in the All-Star Game with 42. Davis destroyed it by double digits when he dropped 52 at home in NOLA in February. Those 52 points included 36 off dunks. It was that kind of All-Star Game.

79. Steph Curry’s impossible layup

Curry and the hoop must have a telepathic relationship or something.

80. John Wall between the legs pass on the break

We saw Westbrook go between someone else’s legs on the break. Wall does it to himself. Magical.

81. Steph Curry hits 13 threes in a game

The dude hit 13-of-17 from deep in a game back in November. If there were any questions as to how he’d play with Kevin Durant, he answered them. (We kept asking, nonetheless.)

82. Kyrie Irving fakes John Henson off the court

Best handles in the NBA.

83. The Knicks and Hawks go to four overtimes

This game included multiple clutch Carmelo Anthony shots, Paul Millsap playing 35 straight minutes and a full 60 overall, and a bonkers fourth overtime. The Hawks won, but isn’t it the journey that counts?

84. John Wall Shammgods Al-Farouq Aminu

If anyone can compete with Kyrie on insane handles, it’s Wall.

85. Kristaps Porzingis’ one-handed block

It’s too bad this only registers as a blocked shot in the box score. I feel like the Nets should have lost points when Kristaps did this.

86. Kris Dunn dribbles around Shabazz Napier

This is a dribble equivalent of a poster dunk. So much disrespect. Poor Shabazz is left having no idea what has occurred.

87. The Warriors score 149 in regulation

... and they didn’t even break a sweat! In fact, Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Draymond Green all sat the fourth quarter.

88. Serge Ibaka Revenge Game

Serge actually got a perfectly respectful welcome back to Oklahoma City in his first game there after being traded to Orlando. But he was not respectful to the Thunder, scoring a career high and hitting a game-winner.

89. The Cavaliers’ White House mannequin challenge

Cleveland recruited Michelle Obama to participate in the best sports Mannequin Challenge during that meme’s run. What a way to cap eight years of basketball being the official sport of the White House.

90. Isaiah Thomas becomes a Boston legend

Isaiah has been incredible all season, but it was in January where he became the King in the Fourth with a string of clutch performances, including this game-winner against the Hawks.

91. Klay Thompson's 60 in 29 minutes

When you play with Steph Curry and Kevin Durant, you get clean looks more often than usual. That doesn’t mean that scoring five dozen in less than a half-hour of play is anything less than insane. Klay is my top candidate to drop 75 in a game in the next five years.

92. Westbrook's 57-point triple-double against the Magic

This was the individual performance of the year for me, edging the next moment on the list. The Thunder, fighting for favorable playoff position, trailed the Magic in the fourth. Russ took over and sent the game to overtime with a game-tying triple. He ended up registering the highest-scoring triple-double ever.

93. Devin Booker's 70

The young Booker became the sixth player ever to score 70. Sure, he did it in part because the Suns intentionally fouled the Celtics in garbage time to get the ball back for Devin. They still count. Booker is super legit.

94. Giannis Antetokounmpo covers 45 feet in one dribble

How?!

95. The LeBron vs. Paul George duel

As LeBron and the Cavaliers prepared for the playoffs and PG and the Pacers were fighting just to make it, the duo had an epic duel that eventually ended with a Cleveland win but an Indiana moral victory.

96. The Warriors vs. Rockets thriller

Houston’s signature win of the season came in the best game of the season ... and the first one that kept everyone up way too late on a weeknight. We had a James Harden triple-double, a Kevin Durant explosion, and a Draymond Green kick — pretty much everything you could want from Rockets-Warriors minus Patrick Beverley ending someone’s season.

97. Marc Gasol’s no-look outlet

This was the season in which Marc’s latent swag came into full view.

98. James Harden's wild no-look lob

This is one of those plays that looks so pretty in realtime and then completely blows your mind when you slow it down and see what happened. It’s a perfect symbol of the extraordinary season Harden had.

99. An impossible Warriors fast break

Steph Curry just throws it up & KD flushes it home! https://t.co/BFKnzbfVnn

— NBA TV (@NBATV) December 6, 2016

Eighty feet without the ball ever touching the floor, and after it leaves Draymond Green’s hands, it never even touches someone whose feet are touching the floor. Unreal.

100. Kevin Love outlet to LeBron for the tie

This incredible play sent an incredible game between the Cavaliers and the Wizards to overtime. In case you’d forgotten, Love can pass as well as any big man and LeBron is cold as a Popsicle in Nunavut.

101. THE BEST MOMENT OF THE NBA SEASON

And finally, the best, most appropriate moment of the 2016-17 NBA season: Metta World Peace hitting a free throw and declaring to all who care to listen: “I love basketball!”

Metta World Peace just loves basketball https://t.co/1jjdkANloe :: @TheCauldron

— SB Nation NBA (@SBNationNBA) November 2, 2016

Thanks for spending the regular season with us. Stick around for the playoffs, too. It’ll be great.