#i doodled this at 6 in the morning while i was sick yes

[sassycyborgninja]

does anyone else see the vision or am i insane

my friend @sol-thorne suggested Ford as Six cuz— SIXer— SIX finger- yk in case that wasnt obvious

we’re geniuses i know youre welcome dont thank us

[its--fandom--darling]

little bean - em x fem!reader

This is my submission to @oneforthemunny​‘s summertime writing game. I chose to do a wildcard 🃏 submission for cowboy eddie and sweet girl. I hope I did them justice and that everyone enjoys this sweet little story about dad!cowboy!eddie as much as I enjoyed writing it. 

Pairing: Dad!Cowboy!Eddie Munson x Sweet Girl!Reader

@oneforthemunny​ @munsonology

Warnings: talk of pregnancy, reader being called little mama, afab reader, brief mention of car accident. please let me know if I’ve missed anything and I’ll update my list. (This isn’t edited. hopefully it’s all good. Enjoy!)

A/N: this is heavily inspired by personal experience with one of those ride and spring ponies that my sister and i had growing up. all header pictures are from pinterest, credit to the og owners of the photos. graphics by @firefly-graphics​

“Can you please uncover my eyes now?” you plead with your fiance as he guides you outside to see his latest surprise. You and Eddie had never really talked about having kids, always considering the many farm animals that you’d convinced him to adopt over the years as your pseudo-children. So when you’d found out that you were pregnant after a fender-bender, you and Eddie had the realization that you both wanted this little bean to be a part of your life. 

This brings you to now, 6 months into your pregnancy. The morning sickness had wrecked you for a while and your cravings had been intense and random. Pickles and peanut butter, sardines and fiddleheads, copious amounts of cheese doodles. But Eddie had taken everything in stride, making the 20 plus minute drive into town to hit the only 24 hour mini mart in the area whenever the urge for a midnight milkshake struck you. He’d truly been a saint, he’d always been good to you, treated you like a princess, but seeing you round with his child had unleashed another side of him, one that was incredibly tender. Without hesitation the two of you had decided to be surprised when the baby came, knowing that no matter what you had, it wouldn’t change the fact that you two were going to spoil, cherish and raise your little bean to be a kind person.  

“Just be patient for a second more, little mama. I don’t wanna spoil the surprise just yet,” he murmured, a grin evident in his voice. 

You huffed in fake annoyance, crossing your arms after the screen door, thwapped shut behind the two of you. 

“Alright, ready?” 

“Yes, Eds! The suspense is killing me!” you squeak, bringing your hands up to grab at your man’s calloused hands where they rested over your eyes. 

He chuckles as he lets his hands be pulled from your eyes. You blink a few times to adjust your vision before taking in his latest surprise. In your silence, your feel him lace his fingers with yours as you feel the familiar burn of tears in your eyes. 

“I know little bean won’t be able to use it for a while after they’ve made their grand entrance, but it was the last one in the store and sweet girl, I just couldn’t resist.”

You turn and kiss him softly. “It’s perfect, I love it.”

Sitting on the front porch is a ride and spring horse, almost identical to the one that you’d described to Eddie. You’d been telling him how, despite being a city girl, had spent many of your earliest summers of childhood at your grandparents. They lived in the countryside in a big white farmhouse style house.  Your grandfather was always a fan of black and white westerns, so you’d watched more than your fair share while your granny took her afternoon nap. You’d expressed to Eddie that those were some of your favorite childhood memories, especially when you’d arrived one day to find a beautiful chestnut colored ride and spring pony on your grandparents front lawn. The image of his sweet girl as child with little pigtails and her grandfather’s cowboy hat slipping down over her eyes as she bounced away the afternoon on that horse had made his heart clench. 

“Really? It isn’t too much? I know that I’ve been spoiling little bean and they ain’t even arrived yet but…”

You cut him off with a sweet kiss, cupping the back of his neck with your free hand and pouring your love and appreciation into the kiss. “It’s perfect,” you repeat as your lips part and he breaks into a grin as you bump your nose against his affectionately. “Thank you, for the horse and for taking care of me and bean. Thank you for listening to me and remembering those little details I shared with you.”

He grins wider, eyes crinkling with it. “It’s my pleasure, sweet girl. You two are my whole world.”

You grin at him, “You forgot about Medusa, can’t have her feeling left out now.” 

He chuckles and rolls his eyes at you, “Well, you’re right about that, sweet girl.”

You kiss him again. “Always am, aren’t I?”

He rolls his eyes, “I’ll give you most of the time, little mama.”

You smirk up at him, “I’ll take it. Now come on and show me what else you got.”

He furrows his brow at you, “What are you talking about?”

“I just know you didn’t leave the store with just that toy, lay it on me, what else did you get?” 

He sighs, “You know me far too well, sweet girl.”

“It’s because I love ya handsome, now show me the goods.”

He chuckles as you settle on the porch swing he’d installed for you when you’d first moved in with him. “I’ll get the bag.”

You giggle and kick your feet up resting your hands on your bump, stroking your thumb over it tenderly as Eddie ran to the pick up to grab the rest of his haul. As you watched him go through everything that he picked up for your future child, you knew that there was no way that you would wanna do this with anyone but your Eddie. 

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(Read more sacrifice)

[fanartfunart]

[Image ID: A 6 panel line art comic of an AU version of Miraculous Ladybug characters where Adrien is using the Peacock Miraculous (Paon Lilas), and Sabrina has the black cat miraculous (Féline Sombre). Panel 1: Paon Lilas sneezes into his arm, surrounded by feathers. A text bubble reads “Aahchoo”. Panel 2: Ladybug stands next to Féline Sombre. Ladybug looks at him with a frown, while Féline Sombre looks at him with concern. Her text bubble reads “Pea-body, are you sick?” Panel 3: Paon Lilas, standing straight, rases a hand. His text bubble reads “Oh, no, I’m just allergic to feathers.” Panel 4: Féline Sombre looks at him with sympathy while Ladybug looks confused. Behind her, as a representation of Ladybug’s internal thoughts is a doodle of a peacock “+” Paon Lilas’s fan, and a feather in a “no” symbol. Ladybug’s text bubble reads “You’re allergic to yourself?!” Féline Sombre’s text bubble reads “oof”. Panel 5: Paon Lilas looks at them, disappointed. Handwritten text reads as his thoughts: “Allergic to myself?” Ellipses in another one of Paon Lilas’s text bubble overlaps with the final panel. Panel 6: Paon Lilas stands straight, closing his eyes with a faux-sad look. His text bubble reads “Yes, totally. Every morning I sneeze myself awake-” End ID]

Fly Away’s version of Mr. Pigeon # who knows anymore. :P

[ladyyatexel]

I'm so sick of filling out paperwork with a Pain Scale!!

I want to be honest and say yes the level of pain that is happening is currently not that bad but the fact that it just never fucking goes away and I am well over having it for 6 months, THAT'S really annoying, that's really life impacting

It's not like I have a really sharp horrible pain occasionally it's that I have worst pain occasionally and doing certain tasks but I have some pain constantly all the time and I just want to be able to move my fucking torso

I have an appointment with a pain doctor at 8:20 in the goddamn morning tomorrow I do not know why that was the only time slot available for me but I'm so fed up with all of this and I sometimes suspect that that is the plan that everybody just wants me to get sick of it and live with it because it would be easier for them to deal with

They're just going to diagnose me with being fat and female and decide that that means it doesn't matter.

This is why you're looking at doodles from me having binged an overt the top manga series because it was easier to ignore that my house was 95 degrees and that I was in constant pain while I was reading comic books

I've made this entire post using the voice to text feature and I haven't gone back to read any of it so whatever

So there's that stressful brain vomit, how about those traumatized friends playing card games 👍

[bobasheebaby]

200 Brooklyn 99 Prompts

Rosa

1 “Talk to him, that's what friends do.” “Nope. I'm gonna wait 'til I'm on my deathbed, get in the last word and then die immediately.” “That's your plan for dealing with this?” “That's my plan for dealing with everything. I have seventy-seven arguments I'm going to win that way.”

2 “I'm already seeing somebody, NAME.” “Oh, and just like that, things got interesting.” “And just like that, I left.”

3 “NAME is even wearing his/her formal leather jacket.” “It's the one without any blood on it.”

4 “Right, that's the guy/girl you said the lame stuff about. Like he’s/she's a good listener.” “Sorry, what do you look for in a guy/girl?” “Real stuff, like the shape of his/her ass.”

5 “Sorry I'm late. I had to go back to the deli and return my Everything Bagel. In what world does everything not include beef jerky?” “All of them.”

6 “He/She also likes to look up recipes online and go, "Who's got the time?"

7 “Thank you, NAME. Your entire life is garbage.”

8 “NAME , tell us about your family.” “I have one.”

9 “Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell.”

10 “I am dating his/her nephew/niece. Now we are hanging out on weekends. What is next? Oh! Small talk.”

11 “Wait, is that a smile I see?” “Possibly. My immune system is too weak to fight off my smile muscles.”

12 “Whoa, what happened? You know what, forget it. I'll just read NAME’s notes.”

13 “NAME? Are you stuck in there?” “No, I'm in here by choice.” “Oh, 'cause I hear some banging noises as if someone was struggling to open the door.” “No. That was the pipes.” “Or, is it the sound of you learning how to ask for help? You know, you can't spell ‘independent’ without ‘dependent.’” “And you can't spell ‘Go [bleep] yourself’ without ‘[bleep] you.’”

14 “I've said "excuse me" more times this morning than I have in my entire life. Twice!”

15 “Oh, nothing better after a long shift than coming to BAR NAME. It's like Cheers, where everybody knows your name.” “A place where everybody knows your name is hell. You're describing hell.”

16 “So, what is this? Casual, serious? I need to know how to make fun of you.”

17 “NAME and I broke up. He/She ate soup too much.” “What, like every day?” “It happened twice.”

18 “So, what are you drinking?” “I'll have a margarita. But, like, a skinny margarita. So, like, tequila, lime, and a tiny splash of agave.” “Mm. I refuse to order that.”

19 “What are you looking all wistful about?” “Just thinking, about relationships and love, and how I'm way better at them than I thought I'd be. Should I do a TED Talk on it?” “Doesn't seem any dumber than all the other TED Talks.”

20 “Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea things were getting that serious.” “Yeah, it's very embarrassing having feelings.”

21 “So are you bringing someone to the wedding?” “No, I'm taking a break from dating for a while.” “What?” “I'm sick of asking people how many siblings they have. Oh, is it somewhere between zero and two? How fascinating.”

22 “I grew a goatee and it looks amazing, and I know you can see it.” “Of course we can see it, NAME. It's horrible.”

23 “It feels like you're being a little harsh.” “Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh. I'll turn it up.”

24 “Are your senses heightened?” “I think I might be pregnant, not bitten by a radioactive spider.”

25 “You're what sneezes are!”

26 “Seriously, you guys should stand up once in a while. You know, for your hearts.”

27 “NAME, this is dumb. I'm just gonna go.” “No, no, no. You promised me more time. I still have seven minutes.” “I really don't want to miss my flight, and I cannot physically stand the way that room smells anymore.” “Just breathe through your mouth.”

28 “You know, some people say, ‘Mo money, mo problems,’ but those people are idiots. Money's amazing.”

29 “Dude, just admit you ruined everything and turned our lives into a living hell. No biggie.”

30 “We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, so if you throw up, you're disqualified.” “I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. My body is terrified of me.”

Jake

31 “I also have a hairline fracture in my thumb. Mankind's least important finger, am I right?”

32 “I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.”

33 “How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty, sixty bucks?” “Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.” “Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?”

34 “So, I'm going to grab a healthy breakfast.” “Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?” “Breakfast burrito, but yeah.” “I pity your dentist.” “Joke's on you. I don't have a dentist.”

35 “I'm talking to my credit card company. I tried to get an online subscription to the New Yorker and they declined me. Apparently, based on my previous purchases, they assumed it was fraud. That's crazy. I'm fancy. One time I had coffee-flavored ice cream.”

36 “Rules are made to be broken.” “They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.” “Uh, piñatas.” “Glow sticks.” “Karate boards.” “Spaghetti when you have a small pot.” “Rules.”

37 “Hey, can I ask you something?” “Mm-hmm.” “If the toilets drain into the ocean, does that mean a tiny shark could swim up and bite me in the butt?” “No, not at all.” “Psh, lame.”

38 “NAME, super important question. Which one of these shirts should I wear to dinner with your dad/mom tonight?” “Those are exactly the same.” “I have a signature look, NAME.”

39 “Hello, good sir, I'd like your finest bottle of wine, please.” “That will be $1,600.” “Great, I'd like your $8-est bottle of wine, please.”

40 “I am straight-up depressed. NAME’s been doing her best to cheer me up. He/She gave me this sticker this morning just for waking up.” “Ew, it's like you're dating your teacher.” “I know, it's so hot.”

41 “Wait. Before you say anything, I want to guess what happened based on your face. Someone died. No! You won a prize. I'm not getting better at this.”

42 “What is the bandwidth on the wifi here? We have much content to stream.”

43 “Oh, you sweaty, chair-spinning morons. You're gonna get us out of here.”

44 “Sir, I think I speak for all of us when —“ “He/She doesn't.” “He/She doesn't.”

45 “So, your brother/sister's a bit of a nightmare.” “I wouldn't say that. I mean, at most, he’s/she's a daymare.” “Those are so much scarier.” “Yeah.”

46 “Look, NAME, I burnt two hundred calories.” “That's your heart rate.” “Yeah, that checks out.”

47 “I don't slump, people. I opposite of slump. I pmuls. That's slump backwards and it's what I do. I pmuls all over this bitch.”

48 “Excuse me. We were just looking for a place to —“ “Boink.” “Yes, boink. That's my preferred term for it, too.”

49 “Thank you for doing this. I love you.” “Noice. Smort. I love you too.”

50 “Adult parties? I believe they're called orgies.”

51 “I have a sexy voice!

Champagne.

Mountain range.

Hugs.”

52 “Has anyone ever told you you look just like a statue?” “Yes.”

53 “NAME, you're smiling. It's very weird. Like seeing a turtle out of its shell.”

54 “You look happy. Let me guess. Your egg sandwich fell on the floor, and they gave it to you for free.” “No. Can you do that? Why doesn't everyone just drop their sandwiches on the floor?” “I was trying to insult you.” “And instead you gave me an amazing life hack!”

55 “So, we gonna talk about what happened back there? I haven't seen someone cry that much since NAME heard they were remaking ‘First Wives Club.’”

56 “Hey, there, NAME. Everything okay?” “No, I'm having a meltdown.” “Props. That was amazing.” “Thanks. It was a lot of work.”

57 “Almost makes me wanna take things seriously all the time. But then I'm like ‘boobs, farts, boobs, whatever’.”

58 “Ahh, babe, this is so nice. There are hot stones on our butts for no reason.” “Not on mine. My butt stones keep falling off, because I'm so tense about NAME being here and ruining everything.”

59 “Okay, don't shoot! That's how people get shot.”

60 “Rule number 3: Let's not have sex right away.” “Cool. Cool cool cool cool cool. No doubt, no doubt, no doubt. Good rule. No sex. Good rule.”

Charles

61 “Okay, but I thought since you were in charge, maybe I could be your right hand man? Your Tinker Bell?” “Tinker Bell?” “Let me tell you something about Tinker Bell. Tinker Bell is a loyal lieutenant and a real thorn in the side of Captain Hook.”

62 “NAME, why don't you show Danger what a fax machine is.” “Okay. Imagine a letter had unprotected sex with a phone.”

63 “Hey, NAME, are you ready to go streaking?” “What?” “That's what my dad/mom and I called getting blonde streaks in your hair. We used to do it to our ponytails on road trips. You just take a little lemon up top, and let the sun do the rest. We called it giving each other road head.” “You just said you called it going streaking.” “It had a couple names.”

64 “So we have good news, and we have bad news.” “My Nana always said, ‘Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie.’ Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.”

65 “What about me? What if something happens to NAME, and he never gets to meet my baby? I don't want to hang out with some stupid baby who's never met NAME.”

66 “Oh, you're right. I'm gonna tell him/her. It might not be today. It might not be tomorrow. It definitely won't be later than tomorrow. So pretty much today or tomorrow then.”

67 “No! I was eavesdropping. I'm always eavesdropping.” “I don't like it.” “Look, I didn't spend the last seven years watching your love ripen, only to have it sullied by a city hall wedding. You're getting married right here, right now.”

68 “I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like him/her a little bit.” “You doodled your wedding invitation.” “No, that's our joint tombstone.” “My mistake.”

69 “How many times have I smacked you in your face?” “Lost count.” “And you still have no fear of me.” “I'm trying to read your womb vibe.” “Exactly. Knock it off.”

70 “Okay, first of all, NAME, you look amazing. Secondly, I made an appointment at the salon with Nikki, for you, under the name Gabriella Fuentes de San Miguel Estrada. I had fun with the name.” “Clearly.”

71 “He’s/She's got a type, which is really any one but you.” “Yeah, that was my ex-husband/ex-wife's type, too.”

72 “Sexy train is leaving the station. Check out this caboose. Later, sluts.”

73 “I can't wait to see you, my luscious little breakfast quiche. I just want to draw you a bubble bath and spoon-feed you caviar. I think we should open up a joint checking account. I love you. [pause] What am I doing?” “It's okay. I hung up right after ‘Chucklebunny’.” “Help me. I've gone Full NAME.”

74 “Do you desire a crispen potato?” “Oh, don't mind if I do-ble. Wait a minute. Crispen potato. Why are you fancy talking.” “How dare you, sir/madam. I speak the common tongue.” “There it is again. You only do that when you're lying or hiding something.” “Hiding? Ha. Pish-posh.”

75 “Hey, donut holes. Don't mind if I do. Eurgh! Fish? Fish donuts, NAME? What is wrong with you?” “It's takoyaki. I'm drowning my sorrows in octopus balls.”

76 “Put on a T-shirt for all I care. It doesn't matter what you wear.” “Of course it matters. He has to wear the smaller checks. Big checks wash him out. Where are you, NAME?”

77 “Ooh, if they have your phone, we can track where they're going. I have ‘Find My Phone’ set up to track you. What? I do that for all my friends, not just you.” “Show me.” “There's no time!”

78 “You okay?” “Yeah, no burns. The doctor said I was lucky my body was so damp.”

79 “You guys have been down here for two hours. What, did you have sex forty times?”

80 “What? You don't need closet space. You have, like, one outfit.”

81 “You just graduated pie school, bitches. [pause] Sorry I said bitches, I'm just really worked up.”

82 “So, I know you're NAME’s best friend, and —“ “Did he/she say that? Did you get that on tape?” “No.” “No, he/she didn't say that or no, you didn't get it on tape? Doesn't matter. Either way, you screwed up big time.”

83 “What you did is the culinary equivalent of unprotected sex.”

84 “That's right. Boom. Just kicked Santa in the testicles.”

85 “No, there's no one in my life. [wink] Sort of a sad thing to wink about, I realize now.”

86 “NAME! Were you dreaming about NAME again?” “Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!”

87 “You used all the touching time, NAME. I get 100% of the goodbye touching time. 100%.”

88 “Do you wanna know why he/she went out with him/her and not you?” “Yeah.” “Because he/she actually asked him/her out.”

89 “NAME, will you taste this batter?” “Mm-hmm. Hmm. I think it's a little off.” “You know what's off? Your mouth! Why NAME lets your stupid tongue anywhere near him/her I'll never know. Nope, I forgot the sugar. That's on me.”

90 “There's no need for NAME to see me unleash the beast.”

Captain Holt

91 “Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big/little brother/sister?” “Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.”

92 “It's the most fun day of the year. Something you wouldn't understand because you're not programmed to feel joy.” “Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.”

93 “Sticks and stones, NAME.” “Describing your breakfast?”

94 “NAME, how are you feeling?” “Better today. I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.” “Smart. Something bland.” “That's my favorite breakfast.”

95 “Joining us for lunch, Sir?” “Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories for this day period.” “Yummy.”

96 “You all right, NAME? Tough weekend?” “I went to Barbados with my husband/wife. We wove hats out of palm fronds and swam with the stingrays. I've never been happier.”

97 “Maybe I should wing it. Love, it sustains you. It's like oatmeal.” “Okay. Okay. Not bad for winging it.” “I lied. Took me two hours to write that.”

98 “I do not have a problem. If I want to play Kwazy Cupcakes, I will play Kwazy Cupcakes. Kwazy is a difficult word to say in anger, but I think I've made my feelings clear.”

99 “This place is so romantic.” “Yeah, and so intimate.” “Don't worry. I'm not listening to you. I'm just thinking about how this sea bass is cold but not as cold and cruel as the hands of fate that have thrust my entire life into darkness.” “Ah, damn it. I just ordered the sea bass.”

100 “Yeah, and your new shirt is very aggressive and confusing. Is the pineapple the slut, or is it calling someone else a slut?” “Clearly the pineapple is the slut.” “Huh.”

101 “Oh, I've caused a problem. I think I am getting a text message. Bloop. Ah, there it is.”

102 “So nice of you to greet us, NAME. I thought surely you'd still be crushed under that house in Munchkinland.”

103 “So, do you NAME --“ “Yes.” “And do you --“ “Yes. Yes. We do. We're married.”

104 “I mean, don't people call you NAME?” “How dare you.”

105 “So you lied to me? Out of pity. You pity me.” “I wouldn't put it that way.” “I would. I am offended. I am angry. I am very tired. So I'm gonna take a nap, but when I wake up, oh, you are in for it.”

106 “Look at that. You've helped me find my smile.”

107 “Huh. Meat from the street. Sounds like a fun treat. Hah. I'm a poet and ... I didn't even know I was rhyming those words. But it happened anyway.”

108 “Oh, look at that. An alert. I'm probably trending already. What? My account has been deactivated?” “Twitter thinks you're a bot.” “Why? I am a human. I am a human male/female.”

109 “Care to sit? I'm sure you'd like to take some weight off your cloven hooves.” “Call me the devil, NAME? How original.” “Actually, I was calling you a goat. You goat.”

110 “NAME! I'm coming with you.” “Thank you, NAME.” “I'm also coming.” “Not necessary.”

111 “Spot checks are done. Needless to say I'm thoroughly underwhelmed.” “Huh. From your expression, I would have guessed constipated. Or chilly.”

112 “NAME, you have a pretty low bar for what you consider drama. Once, I used an exclamation point in a email. You called me Diana Ross.” “I assure you, in this case, I do not exaggerate.”

113 “I know they say it's not good to have a TV in the bedroom. Which is why I don't.”

114 “NAME, did you just laugh?” “Uproariously.”

115 “You know when you play along with the robot jokes, it kinda ruins my enjoyment of them?” “Yes, I know.”

116 “And what do you hope to get out of this, NAME? Let me guess revenge on Dorothy for killing your sister?”

117 “It was a good game though for a dumbass.” Okay, you're kinda overusing that one. Maybe switch it up a little bit.” “Oh, good note. You dick.” “That landed good.”

118 “Dancing over. Situation defused.” “No!”

119 “All right, NAME, I'm sick of you wasting time. So, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants and I'm sitting in my underwear. Happy?”

120 “You found me. Drinking seltzer in the shadows.”

Gina

121 “It's a sloppy Jessica. Mac n cheese, chili, pizza on a bun. Its everything I've wanted to eat for the last 48 hours.” “What happened? I thought you were gonna 'last forever bitches.'” “Turns out I gave up easy. You hear that bitches? I gave up so easy.”

122 “If NAME had a twin, he/she would have eaten him/her in the womb.”

123 “Wait a minute, I think I just figured something out. I got to go.” “Aren't you forgetting something?” [person a gives Person b a kiss on the forehead] “Uh no, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?”

124 “The English language can not fully capture the depth and complexity of my thoughts. So I'm incorporating Emoji into my speech to better express myself. Winky face.”

125 “All right, gang. Diet day 4. How's everyone holding up?” “Honestly, I'm going to last forever. You hear that bitches? I'm gonna last forever.”

126 “If I die, turn my tweets into a book!”

127 “The only reason I didn't tell you is I don't value you as people, so why be honest?”

128 “Breakups are a cartoony thumbs down. They make people feel face-with-Xs-for-the-eyes.”

129 “I'm sorry. I just don't think this is something you're good at.” “What? The only thing I'm not good at is modesty, because I'm great at it.”

130 “Click. I just captured the exact moment you realized you had failed. I guess we all got something out of this.”

131 “It's so addictive, right? I play so much that when I close my eyes at night, I just see cupcakes instead of my normal dizzying array of flashing lights.”

132 “Forget your ex with meaningless sex. It rhymes because it's true.”

133 “NAME. NAME. NAME, I screwed up, big time.” “NAME, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be more specific.”

134 “So, talk to me, goose. How are we looking?” “Sexy, but not like we're trying too hard. Like, sure, we're trying, but it's almost effortless.”

135 “Give me the ring.” “You sound like Gollum.” “That means nothing to me. I don't see those movies, I'm too pretty.”

136 “Oh no, six drink NAME isn't fun. He’s/She's just sad. Damn it!”

137 “I never have second thoughts. That's the luxury of having great first thoughts.”

138 “Ugh, constantly getting NAME’s approval is the worst.” “Yes. I can only imagine.”

139 “You think you can just bully people, but you can't. It's not okay. I'm the bully around here. Ask anyone.”

140 “This just might work out after all.” “You're damn right it will, 'cause we're a ragtag, scrappity, fart-dumb, moron parade, smart-ass team!”

141 “Okay, NAME, stop freaking out. I have the day off. I can step in and help.” “Yeah, me too. I'm not off, but I come and go as I please. It's part of my charm. I'm like an outdoor cat.”

142 “Gina, please keep an eye on NAME today. He's/She’s gonna say something to the wrong person and get himself/herself punched.” “Sure, I'd love to see NAME get punched.” “Try again.” “I will stop NAME from getting punched.” “Correct.”

143 “Oh, I want him/her out. But I'm too scared to tell him/her. “ “All right, listen. I know that your spirit animal is a caterpillar that's been stepped on —“ “Mm-hmm.”

144 “What are you creeps doing? You made me look away from my phone. You better pray I didn't miss a text.” “In the two seconds you looked away?” “Seventeen texts. All of them important.”

145 “What is my favorite soup?” “Chicken noodle.” “Potato leek.” “Corn frickin' noodle. I mean, chowder, damn it.” “You're all wrong. I've never had soup.” “Don't bother. They all suck.”

146 “Okay, so that plumber was useless. But we are two smart and capable people who can definitely figure out how to fix a toilet.” “Of course we can. The internet will tell us what to do. She always does.”

147 “It's crazy how much he/she flirts with me.”

148 “Good morning.” “For whom?” “For you-m.”

149 “So he/she didn't say what happened, which can only mean one thing.” “He's/She’s in a fight club.”

150 “What's up? How can I help?” “Well, when I was a kid, I invented a magnetic flashlight clip so I could read under the covers. This clip and I went all around the world together the Shire, Sweet Valley High, Terabithia.” “But never to a friend's house, huh?” “Uncalled for.”

Amy

151 “That stuff with us is in the past. We talked about that.” “I know, but that was before you saw me in this dope ass tux. I mean you must be freaking out.” “Oh, I really am. I'm really into rented clothes. I love how many butts have been in them.”

152 “You know, we're birds of a feather, you and I.” “I hate cliches.” “Cliches are the worst.”

153 “And now I don't know what to do.” “I think you do know what to do.” “Thanks, NAME.” [leaves the room] “I have no idea what he’s/she's gonna do but that's the safest way to give NAME advice.” “Yep.”

154 “Insult me all you want, for I have only this to say —“ “Victory shall be mine!” “I heard you practicing in the shower. You can't surprise me. Letting me into your life was the worst mistake you ever made.” “Cool, fun take on our relationship.”

155 “NAME, where you at?” “Four drinks.” “What's four-drink NAME again?” “Why don't you come over here and find out?” “Right, Horny NAME”

156 “I'm sorry. We only excluded you because you're kind of an over-texter.” “Over-texter? That's not even a thing.” “Oh really? So you don't remember the time you sent 97 unanswered texts in a five-minute span?” “My phone vibrated itself off the desk. I think it was committing suicide.”

157 “What the hell? I used NAME's exact recipe. I know I'm not a great cook, but I love following instructions.”

158 “What's going on? Is this a dream? No, I'm not holding a label maker.”

159 “My power went out last night and my alarm didn't go off.” “Your alarm is power dependent? You brought this on yourself, son.”

160 “I'd also like to apologize for my friend. His /Her parents didn't give him/her enough attention.”

161 “I'm in! A bet which improves someone's manners? Double score.”

162 “He’s/She's scared.” “He’s/She's not scared. With all due respect, NAME, NAME has no feelings.”

163 “I'm so cold even my fiery dance moves aren't keeping me warm.”

164 “I'm sorry. I tried to be myself and they hated it.”

165 “All right, someone's gotta go out there and kill that feathery bastard. NAME, you're always looking for an excuse to behead something.”

Sergeant Jeffords

166 “It was like taking candy from a baby.” “Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place? Don't give candy to a baby! They can't brush their teeth!”

167 “I was raised on disco. Little NAME loved to hustle.”

168 “Or is your favorite artist really Taylor Swift?” [Scoffs] “No.” “Lie.” “All right, fine, she is. She makes me feel things.” “She makes all of us feel things!”

169 “Urgh, what's in these?” “Potatoes, butter, a little milk. Oh, and I ran out of salt, so I used baking soda.” “Why wouldn't you? They're both white powders. Of course they're interchangeable.” “Yeah.”

170 “I warned you against using donuts. They're my trigger food.”

171 “Hey, NAME, you know how you're really good at doodling?” “I know you think you're complimenting me, but calling them doodles is an insult. You a big fan of Picasso's doodles?”

172 “Your tone's braggy but your words are real sad.”

173 “See, NAME? Tough love works.” “Damn it! NAME proved the wrong point.”

174 “Now, be respectful and grieve your asses off.” “I don't know why this is happening.” “NAME, I love it. Everyone follow his/her lead!”

175 “Everything's spoiled. My lunch is ruined. My chicken, my potatoes, pasta, my meatballs, ham, my yogurt.” “Wow, that's a lot of yogurt.” “I love yogurt.”

176 “Kind of seemed like you were gonna get up and leave after saying all that.” “I was, but I think I hear NAME.”

177 “You better look cute in this picture, or no one's gonna want you. Do something with your damn paws!”

178 “My tolerance has really changed since I had kids!”

179 “I'm hungry!” “Oh, you're in luck; the fanny pack is filled with granola.” “Mmm! Loose granola.” “I don't want fanny granola! I want steaks and whiskey!”

180 “You probably can't tell, but I'm flexing my brain like crazy right now.”

181 “What's that smell? That's lavender. NAME loves lavender.”

182 “Okay. Excuse me. Can we please eat? My body is starting to digest itself. NAME needs nutrients!”

183 “Don't look at me. NAME wastes all that time building muscles, make him do it.” “Oh, come on, you all know these are just for show.”

184 “Sorry? You bumbling son of a bitch. You just ruined my life. I hope you get hit by a truck and a dog takes a dump on your face.” “Nothing to see here. Just a little hypoglycaemic rage. Move along.”

185 “I feel like a proud mama hen whose baby chicks have learned to fly!”

Hitchcock

186 “NAME, why do you have your shirt off?” “Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.”

187 “What bet? What are you guys talking about?” “Seriously? The bet? They've been keeping score all year. It comes up all the time. What are you doing all day?!” “Nothing. Why, you want to hang out?”

188 “So you just want us to lie on the ground and do nothing like a bunch of losers?” “Yes, precisely.” “No!” “Jackpot!”

189 “I don't like it. Something stinks.” “Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.”

190 “My God. NAME, are you the only person still making sense?” “Yeah. It's bad.”

191 “All right, food is ready, decorations are set, guests should start arriving any moment, and the chairs are still perfection.” “He/She said they're perfection. I'm so proud of you, buddy.” “It was you. You made this happen.”

192 “Who do you think it's gonna be?” “I've no idea.” “I bet it's me. I just hope I'm ready.”

193 “Okay, look, this was maybe a weird way to start the night, but the good news is, we can still make our dinner reservation and no one got hurt.” “Actually, I cut myself real bad.” “Of course you did.”

Scully

194 “Oh, so your plan is to not take this seriously at all?” “Oh, I am as serious as a heart attack. No offense, NAME.” “Nah. Mine are never that serious. I call 'em ‘oopsies’.”

195 “I miss my home chair.” “You miss a chair?”

196 “Are those thumbtacks? What the hell, NAME?” “I thought they'd make good confetti.” “Why?”

197 “All right, anyone else have questions? NAME, NAME, you've been weirdly silent.” “We didn't want to say anything that would get us uninvited.”

198 “Okay, first of all, I want to say that this was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. There is so much talent in this room.” “Just tell us, bitch. Act as if you already have the role.”

199 “I'll be back. Don't move.” “Not a problem. I hate moving.”

200 “Where should we begin? Do you have any experience with puzzles?” “Yes. I've never solved one.”

[kkeidawrites]

Her.

Another Plus-size Female Black!readerxAlucard!Castlevania story! This was set before the war began. Enjoy!

Her.

She was graceful.

Beautiful.

Kind.

Ambitious.

And she was way out my league.

Everywhere I went she was in my sights, whether it was in town or she was in the fields pulling weeds to make a living. It was just nice to watch her.

How did it happen? How did we meet? Was it destiny?

I’ll tell you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was late at night and I was returning to Wallachia, where the castle resides. It would was something you would see in your nightmares. A place no one would dare approach. But, it was home. At the time it was.

Her home was perhaps closest to the castle, deep in the forest not to far from the village but, far enough from any prying eyes. I had never once spoken to her, but, simply watched her.

I couldn’t help it, she was so gorgeous and I, Adrian Fahrenheit Țepeș Alucard, was afraid to approach her. It was just this night where I would finally have my chance. I didn’t even know her name.

I was almost to the castle when a shriek broke through the silent night. Alarmed, I looked around my surroundings and smealt blood. Who would be foolish enough to enter the forest this late at night?

“Get the fuck off me!” A woman yelled out along with a loud roar bellowing in pain.

I changed into my wolf form and raced to where the roar was heard. Pausing by a couple of bushes, I could see her. Her beautiful form prancing around a large bat demon that was swinging its heavy, clawed hand at her. She easily dodged his swings and a ball of energy lit from her left hand as she fired blue flames at the monster.

The creature screamed in pain and she used her right hand to take out her curved knife to stab the back of the creatures leg, making it fall to a knee. Stopping her flames for a second, she jumped in the air and slashed the demons neck. Purple blood splattered all over the ground and the demon finally fell to its death, landing by her feet with a sickening thud.

Throwing her long hair over her shoulder, she sighed in relief and put her knife away. Walking towards the dead demon she used her flames to incinerate the body; to prevent it from returning.

Hearing something in the bushes, she pointed her flames to the bushes nearly hitting Alucard. He watched the flames hit a set of trees before being extinguished.

Alucard’s POV

‘A speaker magician?’ I thought.

“Whose there?” She called out. I turned my attention back to her and watched as she prepared herself for battle again. She pulled out her knife and readied herself for anything.

“Come out now, or I’ll be forced to kill you.” She threatens. Raising an eyebrow, I took a step out from my hiding place and morphed back into human form. Stepping into the moonlight, her eyes roamed over my lean form and finally landed on my long sword on my hip.

“Who you?” She asked.

Her voice. Why could I not say anything?

“Hello? You don’t understand me?” She continued.

“I am Adrian Fahrenheit Țepeș, son of Lisa and D-” I had stopped. No. Not yet. I could not tell her who my father was.

“Son of Lisa and D? Is that some kind of acronym?” She asked.

“No. My father’s name is Mathias Cronqvist Țepeș. You may call me Alucard and I didn’t mean to say D-I meant-well...ahem.” I cleared my throat and bowed to her.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, my lady. May I know your name?” I asked.

“I am Aila. I don’t have a family, wouldn’t call them one anyway.” She said shrugging.

“Why are you out here so late?” I find my self asking.

She tilted her head at me and shrugged again.

“Dunno. Nice night.” She said loosely.

“That’s not a very good answer.”

“So, What? It’s not your business to know what I’m doing at night.” She sassed, crossing her arms.

“Perhaps it isn’t but, there are demons out here.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“You can. But, what if you end up in a dilemma where you can’t?” I asked. She couldn’t answer me, only pouted. She was too beautiful to pout.

“I’ll find a way.” Alia finally said.

“Anyway, what are YOU doing in the forest so late at night?” She asked.

This time I didn’t have an answer to give her. I couldn’t tell her I was going home because she’ll become suspicious of me.

“I am a traveler.” Mentally face palming, she frowned in suspicion and looked at my attire again.

“Why would a traveler where a long cloak, and a dress shirt to travel? You look like you are going to a ball first then a sword fight afterwards.” Alia said. I chuckled.

“Alright, I’m not a traveler. I am simply...out and about.” I told her.

“Hmm...” she put a finger under her chin and began to think.

“Out and about you say? Interesting.” She stated before turning to leave.

“Well then, Mr. Țepeș I hope you have a good night, but I should be on my way now.” She waved goodbye leaving me to my thoughts and watching her curvy figure leave the area.

Alia.

Beautiful.

Continuing my trek to the castle, I couldn’t help but feel giddy about my success of finally getting a chance to speak with the beautiful woman that has been on my mind for weeks.

Finally home, I pushed the large double doors and entered the main hall where the never ending spiral stairwell was in view. It was warm in here. Perhaps, my mother made the castle this way to her liking, it was becoming quite cold out.

“Adrian...” I heard a masculine voice call to me. I looked up on the stairs to see my father. The well renowned vampire, all who fear him and know him as Dracula Vlad Țepeș. He descended the steps and finally made it to the bottom where he nodded in greeting.

“Father...good evening.” I said respectfully bowing to him.

“Where have you been, my boy? Your mother has been worried sick. Won’t go to bed without knowing where you were.” He told me.

“I was out learning about minerals in substances and how it can effect the human body.” I said, digging around in my pockets to pull out a notebook and a red book.

“I took some notes of what I’ve learned and made some comments on my research.” I continued. Dracula approached me and held out his hand, I sat my notebook in his hand and he flipped through the pages to look over my work.

“Hmm, very interesting work you have here...” he continued to flip the pages while I stood and watched him with a focused eye.

“All of your notes are very well written and informative. However...” he slowed his pace and gave a raised eyebrow with a small smirk.

My eyebrow raised as well at this as my father turned my book to my view and I almost fainted. It was an unfinished picture of Alia. She was walking on the shoreline near the river outside of the village, wearing such sinful clothing. That was the first time I saw her. Her curves showcased and her hair curly and wild, that looked so soft to touch.

“I-” I didn’t know how to explain this. I could have sworn I took out that drawing ages ago.

“My boy, are we smitten with this woman in the picture?” My father teases, closing the book.

“That is just a doodle. I was slacking off one day and I decided to take a break from my studies.” I tried to lie. Tried to, but my father laughed, his deep laugh bellowed throughout the empty halls.

“My son, you cannot lie to a man who has been in the same situation as you have. Tell me, is she as beautiful in the picture?” He asks.

“Father-”

“Adrian! There you are!” We both turned to see my mother coming quickly down the steps and running over to us. Her blonde hair was bound in a bun on top of her head and she wore her night dress. She pulled me into a hug and I returned the gesture. Once she pulled away, I felt her small hand hit the side of my head. It didn’t hurt but, I still winched at the contact of discipline.

“Where have you been?! I have been worried sick! You were supposed to be back by nightfall! It’s damn near morning!” She scolded me.

Bowing my head in embarrassment, Dracula laughs again and places his hands on Lisa’s shoulders.

“Be calm my dear, it would seem that our son has been keeping a secret from us. And I believe he should share.” My father was cheesing over my mother’s shoulder whom was still glaring at me.

“Well Adrian? What is this secret your father is talking about?” She said hands on her hips and tapping her foot.

Groaning, I rubbed my head and looked at my parents.

“There is a woman-”

“A woman?!” My mother squealed, her anger obviously gone and now she was bouncing in place.

“Yes, I have grown interested in her but, I do not know how to approach her.” I told them. I suddenly became upset. My parents noticed.

“The thing is...I don’t want to scare her away because of who I am.” I said solemnly.

“You have not told her what you are, have you?” My father asked. Shaking my head, I heard him sigh and my mother’s soft hands lifting up my head to look in her blue eyes.

“My sweet boy, you just have to be yourself. Being who you are won’t scare her away.” Lisa told him.

“Now, come come! Let’s talk about what she’s like in the study!” She said. I looked to my father for help and he shrugged with a shit eating grin.

End of Part 1

1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8 // Bonus!!

[devnny]

CHAPTER TWO.

JTRM — THE “R” STANDS FOR RECOVERING!

PREVIOUSLY.

This is it fellas; the MEAT, the starting point that actually matters. It's all a damn mess hereafter. Devi, babey... forgive me, the Hell begins now! (And Johnny... please fucking behave yourself.) 

Dear Diary,

I’m back from vacation.

I have a date FUCK meeting with Devi. Yes, that Devi. Weird, no?

She grew a head-thing too, but she can control it, and she’s going to try and help me do that too… We’ll see how well that works out. She yells a lot��� scary.

I haven’t totally given up on my emotional enema idea, though! Just gotta work on my temper. Why does everything have to be so aggravating?

--

3:00PM:

“I must be out of my fucking mind, Tenna.”

“I thought you just got over being out of your mind.” Tenna replied from the couch, squeaking Spooky as punctuation to her sentence.

“Don’t chastise me.” Devi moaned, loosely draped over her armchair. “Sickness has nothing on Nny.”

She dragged herself into an upright position to continue her complaints.

“AN ART LESSON FOR A MURDEROUS LUNATIC, yeah, innovative idea there, Devi!” She cried to the gods in vain. No gods could save her from the bed she’d made so neatly for herself.

“Maybe he won’t show up?” Tenna tilted her head further off of the couch in an attempt to make eye contact with her forlorn companion. Devi only melted further down her seat.

“That’s my only hope.” She sighed. “But knowing my luck, he’ll show up with a bouquet of severed hands for me. God it was so… weird talking to him again. Besides the topic being about personal insanity and death, it was sorta like old times.”

Tenna sat up to stare at her skeptically.

“Don’t tell me you missed him.”

“NO, no! Nothing as stupid as that.” Devi insisted. “Well, I mean, I did miss the Nny I thought I knew, but that’s kinda “sucks to suck”, seeing as that Nny wasn’t… really him.”

“And what if that was the real him? And you’re going to slowly scrape Mister Nice-guy out of his skull with your bare hands, like some kind of monkey artist-therapist combo?”

“I doubt that even more.”

Devi got up from her chair to scoop up the art tablet that was besmirched with Johnny’s drawing from off of the coffee table. The little stick figure he scribbled down had stayed there, mocking her, since his creator had left in the early morning hours. Johnny had only shared a couple of his “Happy Noodle Boy” comics with her long ago, likely because he was embarrassed about them. He had said he used to paint and sketch very detailed pieces, but as “something” – which she now knew was the “Doughboys” and wall-demon, and whatever else was involved with these brain parasites – overtook him, he lost all ability to create beyond these meager doodles. She couldn’t imagine a more horrid fate for a creative. For herself.

To some degree, she pitied him, but then she would remember he that tried to murder her and felt a lot less pity. Even if she understood now that he was hapless pawn, set forth to do obscene violence in the name of some otherworldly creature, all that said about him was that he was too weak-willed to stubbornly commit to his art the way she had – so could she even help someone like that?

It was irrelevant, she decided, since his new little “voice” wanted to involve her in his scheme to eat the last remaining bits of Johnny’s brain. If she didn’t try and aid him now, he would probably just manifest in a couple of months to try and either murder her or… worse.

She shook her head. Disgusting!

“I don’t have a choice with this Tenna.” Devi grumbled. “Or rather, I guess I do, and I’m choosing to deal with this now, instead of trusting Nny to have any mental wherewithal to fight this off and not turn into a puppet again.”

“That’s very brave of you, Devi. You’re an inspiration.” Tenna joked, wiping a fake tear away. Devi groaned.

“Thanks. Now get out of here, before the creature himself shows up.” She tossed the tablet back onto the table haphazardly. “I know how he acts around me, relatively anyway, but I don’t need extra company throwing him off-balance, and this ends up a double murder.”

“Okayyy, but if things get hairy, give me a code, like, three stomps on the floor, or eerie silence, or something, and I’ll call the cops!” She grinned from the doorway.

“WHAT GOOD WOULD IT DO!?” Devi steamed and slammed the door shut. She still had very bitter feelings about the city’s useless police force – demon intervention or not.

--

6:01PM:

Johnny sat with his knees up under his chin in the driver’s seat of his car. He pressed his shins against the steering wheel anxiously while he tried to think about what to do. He had gone home and bummed around – the house was still as he’d left it, only dustier, which was to be expected -- until the afternoon, after which he started panicking like the madman he was. What the hell was he supposed to do, actually show up to this thing against his wishes? An ‘art lesson’ with that intimidating woman that he didn’t particularly enjoy being around anymore, mostly because she berated him with scathing honesty now!? Ridiculous!

Yet he was here, parked behind a 24/7, less than a block from her apartments, at the time she requested he come. Curse her, and curse her rightness about all of this. He didn’t want to go.

Hesitantly he moved a hand over and grabbed a small bag of his own art supplies from home. Nothing fancy, but he preferred his own pens for inking comics, as he knew how they performed. Small increments of control was better than none, after all.

Johnny, bag clutched to his chest, exited his vehicle and kicked the door shut. As he walked from the alleyway to the sidewalk that lead to Devi’s building, he questioned all the uncertainties that he was headed directly towards.

The most basic of those worries was his timing for this meeting – arriving early was out of the question, but he had arrived almost exactly on time, which also seemed kind of pathetic. He hated getting caught up in these sort of social dilemmas – but since it involved another person, and one that he kinda-sorta respected in the highest regard, he wanted to make a good impression! What if she was irritated that he was even a minute late? Or what if that made him look totally creepy, and arriving loosely around 6:00PM was more of what she imagined? Stupid social cues!

Amongst his inner-monologuing, he failed to realize how close he was to Devi’s apartment until he was at the steps of the building. He cursed to himself, then treaded up into the lobby and checked the time on the digital wall clock that hung lopsided by the elevators. 6:14PM.

“Shit.” Johnny mumbled again. He didn’t want to hurry if this was supposed to be a casual timeframe, but he didn’t want to doddle either! He decided to take the stairs, but briskly.

--

FOUR FLOORS UP:

Devi had just started to think that the glimmer of a chance that Johnny wouldn’t show up was plausible, when the door knock came.

“Shit.” She griped from the kitchen. Her chest heaved out a sigh, and she aggressively set down her glass of water on the counter. This was going to be a long night, surely.

A few short strides to the door, and she opened it up to her expected guest. At least he didn’t have a bouquet of human limbs.

“Hi.” Johnny shot her a sideways smile. Devi did her best to hold in any unhappy noises, and tried to force what little optimism she had out from the very bottom of her soul.

“Hey, Nny.” She replied, only a little dryly. Johnny smiled wider at that.

“No bat tonight?” He pointed to her bare right hand. Devi looked down to it, then back at him.

“Don’t tempt me.” She stepped aside and let him in, hoping that the act wasn’t just as good as signing her death certificate. Johnny strolled in much too casually for her liking, but she ignored that, hoping to put off any bursts of maniacal rantings from him as long as she could.

Johnny looked around her apartment, like a normal house guest might, seeing as he was one this time. He inspected a few of her paintings with a thoughtful smile on his face and his hands crossed behind his back, still clutching his pencil bag. Devi’s eyebrow ticked in annoyance.

“I didn’t really get a good look at your apartment last night. It’s nice. Very you.” He hummed.

“Thanks.”

“These are your paintings aren’t they? I like them.”

“Thank you, Nny.” Devi rolled her eyes tiredly. “Can we focus here, a little bit?”

“I’m only trying to be polite! You were so kind to invite me back despite desperately wanting to smash my skull in yesterday.” He smiled at her again, almost arrogant, as though trapping her in small talk was a necessary evil, and if he had to suffer this social outing, so did she. Devi snorted.

“Your immense politeness is noted. Now let’s get on to what you’re here for.” She tilted her chin in his direction as she walked by, leading him further into the living room. She sat with a leg tented up on the floor, and Nny followed, sitting across from her with his feet together.

“I see you came prepared for this. That’s good.” She noted the little bag in his lap, choosing to assume it was art supplies and nothing sinister. Johnny grinned while Devi took up the same drawing pad from the night previous. He eagerly opened the pouch to spill out his pens and pencils onto the table. Devi held in any relief that she was right in her assumption.

“So. You just want me to draw?”

“Yeah.”

“And you really think that’s the key thing here?” Johnny questioned skeptically.

“Sickness always talked about how annoying my work ethic was for her. While she was trying to form, I guess, I was using too much of my brain for painting stuff, so she couldn’t grow right, or quickly, or whatever.”

“I see…” Johnny brought a knuckle up to his mouth. “So it’s not so much using your brain, but using it for creative endeavors? Writing, drawing, thinking?”

“Seems like it.” Devi leaned back on her palms. “And to a further extent, not giving in to the temptation of sitting around and doing nothing. There were times where all day I’d be thinking; “I need to work, I need to work”, but I just sat there on the couch thinking about it, never actually got up and did anything, which is what she wanted. For you, it was probably a little different, seeing as – as far as I know – the only supernatural thing that lived in the apartments besides Sickness was the psychic fat of a morbidly obese woman.”

“…What?”

“Nevermind.” Devi looked around before settling her eyes on the paper again. “Just draw, for like, an hour. I need to get some work done too, so I’ll just sketch concept crap while you do that.”

“What should I draw?” Johnny inquired while he jammed the eraser of his pencil up against his gumline.

“I can’t tell you that, that defeats the purpose.” She sighed. “Just, draw a comic, I don’t know. It doesn’t have to make any fucking sense, just something.”

“HAH!” Johnny laughed. “Well I have good news about my Happy Noodle Boy comics, then.”

He seemed a little more enthused at that and pulled the tablet in his direction, before hunching over the table and skritching away at the paper beneath him. Devi watched him curiously a moment before returning to her art room to retrieve her own sketchbook.

--

45 MINUTES IN:

Devi looked up from her perch on her armchair at her struggling ‘student’. She’d already watched him wad up and throw three separate sheets of paper around him, and he was looking more unhinged the less his drawings were coming out like he wanted. Johnny stared at his current page with his lips pursed and his eyebrows furrowed tightly. As he lifted a hand up to the spiral of the tablet, Devi interrupted him.

“Ah.” She scolded. “Keep going.”

“But it’s STUPID. It makes no SENSE.” He argued at her from the floor.

“I told you that’s fine. Don’t get frustrated on the details, it’s fine if it looks like crap as long as you finish.”

“IT’S NOT!”

“Nny.” Devi’s eyelids lowered, indicating as ungently as possible that she wasn’t budging on the subject. Johnny responded with collapsing across the table dramatically.

“THIS IS TOO ANNOYING, I WON’T CONTINUE.” He seethed. “I’m going to the 24/7 and getting a Brain-Freezy!!”

“No, you are not. Finish your stupid comic, you only have like, ten minutes until ‘break time’ anyway.”

“YOU CAN’T MAKE ME STAY!” He screamed back, raising up to glare at her with his hands flat on the table. “I’M TIRED of being controlled, this is idiotic!!”

Devi frowned and set her sketchbook aside.

“Don’t be such a baby!” She chided him. “Think of the goal you’re working towards, you moron! Complaining about not being free when working toward freedom? HELLO?”

Johnny kicked his legs out and let himself fall backwards onto the floor, glaring at the ceiling as though it had called him a slew of cusswords. After a few moments of heaving breaths, Devi watched his chest slow to childlike huffing.

“But… I HATE it, Devi. I HATE IT!” Johnny clenched his fists tightly. “I hardly even enjoy drawing these ASININE Noodle Boys anymore!! I want to draw the way I used to, and this just reminds me that I can’t!! Sometimes it’s still fun, but mostly it SUCKS! COMPLETELY SUCKS!”

“Jeezus… don’t look at it like that, Nny.” She sighed. Tenna joked about her being a therapist monkey, but that was barely an exaggeration if this was going to be how things went every encounter. “Look at your scribbles like the first step back to your previous talent, not a continuous path of stagnant shit you have to walk. I swear, Johnny, this is going to help.”

She hoped that she was swearing to something she could actually bolster, especially after Johnny rolled his head over to give her an immensely forlorn expression. After a moment he sighed and sat back up, lamely picking up his pencil to continue drawing. Devi watched him again, a pinch uncomfortable with the sudden seriousness of the mood, and tried to think of something funny to say.

“Well,” She picked up her work again. “I guess if all else fails, you can just die again.”

Anyone else might have thought the comment cruel, but Johnny burst into a fit of muffled hysterics. Devi smiled against herself, but did her best to hide it behind her sketchbook. Johnny’s giggling tapered off as he settled his hand back onto the page he was working on.

“You know,” He began as he started scribbling. “the funniest thing about the whole dying incident… the method was so stupid.”

“I told you about the RadioShack arm and all of that, but the way I rigged it, it shouldn’t have ever worked! It was hooked up to the phone, and would activate when I got a phone call, but wouldn’t actually go off until I picked up the receiver and said “hello” into it. As Psycho-Doughboy so kindly said, it was a load of shit! I never get calls, not even wrong numbers, and especially not at 2 o’clock in the fuck-all morning!”

Devi’s hand stopped moving mid-stroke, her eyes wide. Johnny didn’t notice, and continued speaking while he drew.

“But, out of all the shit luck I’ve had, the phone rings, right then, right when I was screaming with the Doughboys, saying I was calling the whole thing off! Now that I think about it… I don’t know why I didn’t just… not pick it up – BUT, thank fuck I did, right?”

Devi remained silent, her throat suddenly, and increasingly, dry. It couldn’t be, it just could not be. Her mind raced; maybe it was wrong, she was mistaken – but there was no way, it fit too well. All she heard was that fucking “hello”, then a bang – a gunshot. A thud. A scream. If Johnny was still talking now, she couldn’t hear him.

“It was me.” She said suddenly, bringing Johnny out of his thought.

“Huh?”

“…It… was me. It was me, I was the one that called you that night.” Devi’s widened eyes lifted to stare at him as she spoke. “Tenna said… I was just… checking if you still lived there.”

Her mumblings died off as her eyes wandered away from Johnny’s face to bore into the drywall across the room. Johnny blinked, barely processing what she was saying.

“What? You called me that night, Devi?” He wondered only briefly how she could know it was that exact night, but quickly rationalized that he hadn’t received any other phone calls besides that one, before or since. It was Devi. His eyes grew impossibly larger as the reality of it dawned on him.

He stood up, unable to keep still with the sudden surge of energy pulsing throughout his body.

“You, you – YOU called me Devi!” He paced as he handled the information. “You did – oh my God, I can’t believe I never thought of this before!”

Devi’s attention made it’s way back to her now manic guest, and she watched him uncomfortably from her seat. Johnny smiled uneasily, holding his head while he walked.

“The entire reaction, I gave the reaction the credit for removing those shitty horrors from me, but I never thought of the action! The call itself! It wasn’t just the GUNSHOT, it wasn’t just DYING, it was that phone call! MORE IMPORTANTLY, it was the one that placed that phone call!! My God, all this time I’ve been ambling around, a slave free from his shackles, thrust into a world unknown, when the KNOWING was right there!! It was so obvious!”

He stopped his frantic pacing to kneel into a lunge at the foot of Devi’s armchair, startling her further into the fabric of it’s back. Johnny grabbed the corners of her sketchbook, which she was using as a pathetic shield between her frazzled self and the man before her, and he smiled wide with excitement.

“Oh, Devi! Devi it was always YOU – who else would it be!? Who else COULD it be!” Johnny breathed through a laugh. “Devi, you KILLED ME.”

She could only stare at him in silent horror. It wasn’t like she meant to kill him! She did say that she wished he would die for making her like him so much and then letting her down so horrendously but – Christ, it wasn’t meant to be so literal! She didn’t want to be the cause of it! If he wanted to just go vaporize and leave her alone, that’s what she would have preferred back then. Johnny didn’t seem to realize her discomfort on the gruesome truth to his ‘demise’.

“You stripped me of those wretched little monsters – even the WALL-THING!” His smile didn’t waver. “I should have known; there was a reason you escaped! No, a reason I MET you!”

Devi wanted to interrupt before he convinced himself of some soulmates bullshit, but her throat felt clogged, and nothing would come out.

“And here you are, helping me again… Fuck’s sake, I’ve been so foolish! So BLIND!” Johnny’s fingers gripped onto her sketchbook harder, pulling it down so the top was under his chin as he leaned in further. “All this time, it was always you; you made me happy, you escaped, you released me of that Hell!! If fate’s a real thing, THIS is it! How else would I get aligned with the one person, after all of that previous shit, that has the mental fortitude to withstand an attack from those disgusting vermin!?”

“J… Johnny.” Devi managed finally, through her barely functioning jaw. The sound of her voice seemed to reel him in a ways, and he slid back to sit on his heel expectantly, but with a much less wild look in his eyes.

“Oh, I beg you, please don’t be nervous Devi! I don’t hold any resentment for your hand in my death, not at all!” He chuffed. “And I’m so sorry for… for yelling, and being an overall pain in your ass since visiting you. I swear, after this, that’s it! Whatever you say, goes.”

Devi blinked in surprise at that. Was he honestly pledging his loyalty out of sheer gratitude that she inadvertently kind-of murdered him? She could only stare at his eager eyes, unsure of whether to be horribly afraid of this new measure of weirdness in their relationship, or to feel safer in that she was his so-proclaimed Angel of Death.

“Um… uh…” She tried to think of something to say, but was still panicking internally. “Um, y-y’know what, Nny?”

She hated how his head perked up, like he was waiting on her word.

“A uh… a Brain-Freezy sounds good, actually. You wanna go grab us a couple while I… think about what kind of existential bullshit I’m experiencing right now?”

“YUM. Yes, okay! I will!” His smile pulled up on one side, letting his gums peak out, before he ran to the door. He halted abruptly and turned to her again. “Is Cherry Doom okay? That’s the flavor I get.”

“Yeah.” Devi didn’t even think about her answer, and watched him leave with an uncertain, disturbed look in her eyes. She melted unceremoniously against the chair, arms and legs splayed out, and continued to stare at nothing in particular. She didn’t want Johnny to like her so immensely -- she didn’t even want for him to like her much at all! The way this was going, she might be stuck with him as long as his gratitude lasts. How long could the frenzied gratefulness of a homicidal maniac last, exactly?

--

NEXT.

[ebhenah]

Klancemas December 18: Snowed In

@monthlyklance 

Klancemas 2018

"Jigsaw"

Dec 18: Snowed In

(A future Klance-Family Fic)

Keith woke to the smell of food. Something vaguely reminiscent of bacon and eggs, but not… quite. There was a very strange quiet stillness to the air that he wasn’t a huge fan of, too. And he wasn’t the only one who felt it- Kosmo was pacing. Weird. There was something weird going on.

He was just about to call out to Lance when the bedroom door swung open and Lance appeared before him, dressed in pj bottoms and an apron, carrying a tray, and holding a neon green alien flower between his teeth, tango-style. “Ayyy-baape,” he said around the stem, the flower making his pronunciations strange, and set the tray over Keith’s lap. He pulled the flower out of his mouth and bowed dramatically, offering up the pleasant smelling plant with an over the top flourish. “Breakfast in bed for Mr. Kogane, prepared especially for you BY Mr. Kogane.”

“Lance, the wedding was six months ago,” he laughed, accepting the flower, “when are you going to get sick of that joke?”

“Ummm… never!” He looked scandalized, “you, sweetums, did not get to see the look on your face when you found out I was taking your name. If you had, you’d know, I am never going to get sick of reminding you that I am Mr. Kogane. Ever.”

“Dork,” he muttered, letting his hair fall into his face to hide his blush… because, despite his protests, he loved it. He loved that Lance took his name. Loved Lance’s reasons for it “your Dad was a hero, and he had one son… who is also a hero… I am VERY proud to be a Kogane”. Loved that Lance made a point of reminding him of it, or correcting people who called him McClain. Loved that even now, half a year after the wedding, he’d still find ‘Mr. & Mr. Kogane’ doodled on scrap paper and napkins and the margins of paperwork that had been within reach when Lance was trying to pay attention to something that bored him. It was something he hadn’t thought mattered to him until the instant that it happened.

Lance had a knack for knowing what would make him happy, or upset. It sometimes felt like Lance knew him better than he knew himself. When he’d mentioned it, Lance had waved him off saying that Keith knew- he’d just spent so long convincing himself not to care so he didn’t get disappointed when it didn’t happen, that he just ignored it. Lance didn’t ignore it.

Lance’s long fingers cupped his chin and tipped his face back up, “but I’m YOUR dork, so… what does that say about you, Mullet?”

“That I am incredibly lucky?” he guessed, smiling tenderly at Lance.

“Nice save,” Lance laughed, “you’re learning.”

“Maybe marriage just agrees with me,” he countered, closing the distance between them to give his husband a kiss. “Is this all for me, or are we sharing?”

“We are sharing,” Lance crawled into the bed beside him, “it’s more romantic…. And there are fewer dishes that way.”

“Alright, but we shouldn’t get distracted,” Keith said, trying for a serious tone, despite the huge smile on his face. “It feels really late. We need to get going.”

“Yeahhhh,” he drawled, “about that… we aren’t going anywhere.”

“What do you mean?” Keith froze, his fork mid-air. “We finished up the mission YESTERDAY. We need to get back.”

“Soooo, while we were sleeping, it snowed,” Lance offered him a wan smile.

“Okay- snow isn’t a big deal.”

“On thiiiiiiis planet, it kinda is, though,” Lance said, “because the entire cabin is buried. I was talking to Rigrill on the intercom- remember Rigrill? He was the check-in guy at that weird pool-slash-gym-slash-bouncey-house- building? Anyway, he said that this happens all the time and that we should be able to leave by the end of the night.”

“The end of the NIGHT?” Keith echoed.

“Yeah…” he looked sheepish, “by the time we get out of here, get to the Lions, and make our way home…”

“It will be lunchtime, at the earliest,” he sighed.

“Yeah.” His shoulders sagged, “I’m sorry. I know you promised my parents we’d be there for Noche Buena celebrations tonight, and your mother and Shiro were going to join us for Christmas brunch in the morning. I shouldn’t have pushed to spend the night here. I messed up our first Christmas as a married couple.”

“You didn’t mess anything up, Lance,” Keith sighed, “you had no way of knowing that we’d get stuck here.”

“I just thought it was so pretty with all the ice walls and the rainbow lights and stuff.”

“I know,” he smiled at Lance, “and it was. We had a really great night. Stop being so hard on yourself. I can think of worse things than being stuck in a luxury cabin with you for a day.”

That seemed to cheer Lance up a bit, he peeked up at Keith, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips, “you’re sure?”

Keith laughed, “yes, Lance. I’m sure. Now, eat… before the breakfast you made us gets cold.”

Lance picked the flower up from where Keith had set it on the tray and tucked it behind his ear, the bright green standing out against Keith’s black hair. “Love you, Mullet.”

“I can’t believe you STILL call me that,” Keith sighed, “my hair was never a mullet. It’s just long.”

Lance paused in his eating long enough to snicker at him, “mullet… mulllllllll-et…”

“You realize that your mother loves me and has offered to show me allllll the photo albums, right? I heard rumors from your brother about some kind of mishap with beard trimmers?”

Lance gasped, clutching his chest dramatically, “you wouldn’t! You PROMISED!”

He took a bite of the not-bacon and quirked one eyebrow in a clearly challenging expression.

“Keith!” Lance squawked, “I’m serious! No looking at childhood pictures with my Mom! I almost put it in the VOWS!”

He washed the bite down with some water- which tasted oddly perfumey. Not BAD, just weird. “You realize that’s VERY strange, right?” he laughed, “almost concerningly so. Silvio looks almost exactly like you and he’s a cute kid- what on EARTH could be so awful in those pictures.”

“Nope! Not telling! And you are going to KEEP that promise. Right?”

Keith narrowed his eyes suspiciously, but relented. “Fine. I promised. I keep my promises.” He leaned over to kiss Lance’s jaw softly, “just… remember that I ALSO promised to love you no matter what the universe throws at us. I think some bad photographs and embarrassing home videos falls into that category… don’t you, Tumbleweed?”

“Yeahhhh,” Lance drawled, “I don’t want to risk it.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Keith muttered, shaking his head.

“Hey! You knew that when you married me!”

“I wasn’t claiming it was a NEW development, Lance!”

The conversation devolved into their unique brand of flirting- half good natured ribbing, part challenging each other, and part genuine affection. Most people didn’t quite get it, but it worked for them. By the time the food was gone, they were both well-fed, as was Kosmo, who was routinely snuck morsels from each of them as they both pretended not to notice the other breaking the ‘no table scraps for the space wolf’ rule.

Keith insisted on clearing the tray away, since Lance had cooked. The cabin had started to get chilly, so after he loaded the dishes into the cleaning machine, he built up the fire. The alien wood burned blue and purple and green, but he’d been assured that it was absolutely safe. It was pretty, actually. Once the fireplace was pumping heat out again he wandered over to the funky windows. They looked like the rest of the wall, but you could trigger a panel and they turned completely transparent. He and Lance had spent a good few hours taking in the breathtaking views from their windows of the ice walls- huge cliffs of what looked like icicles, that caught the light and glowed in rainbow hues. There had been some absolutely gorgeous pale blue and lilac swan-like creatures that Lance had fallen in love with, too. As the sun set, the entire place lit up, and the birds took to the sky once full dark hit, luminescent against a starless sky. It had been well worth getting stuck here an extra day.

He wanted to get an idea of how the snow clearing was coming along, so he triggered the windows. At first he thought it hadn’t worked- there’d been so little change in the greyish blue wall. It took him a moment to realize that the light was different in the window sections. The walls were the same color as a drift of snow. Lance hadn’t been kidding when he’d said the cabin was buried! Yikes!

“Cool! I found some… umm… I think that’s a board game, but I don’t know the alphabet, so probably not gonna be able to figure out the rules… Oh! This is a jigsaw puzzle! No language barrier to a jigsaw puzzle, right?”

Keith looked over to see his husband, barefoot and bare chested, but wrapped in a blanket he’d stolen from the bed, holding up a wide, shallow box triumphantly. His heart skipped a beat, just at the sight. They’d been married for 6 months, engaged for a year and a half before that, dating for almost a year before THAT… and before they’d started officially dating… well, things had been complicated and confusing and intense. But he could barely remember what life was like without Lance by his side. He SHOULD be accustomed to it by now… but no. A few times a day.  Everyday. Every SINGLE day. Without fail. A few times a day, Lance would say something, or he’d catch a glimpse of him doing something totally normal and unremarkable, or he’d catch a whiff of Lance’s scent lingering on his skin, or the pillow, or his collar and he’d fall, all over again. His breath would catch, just like it was doing right now. He’d get butterflies, just like he had right now. His heart would skip a beat, just like it just had… and his blood would sing,  drowning out everything but Lance. “No, I guess there isn’t,” he answered with a smile.

“Spiked hot chocolate and puzzles in front of the fire?” Lance suggested, “I’ll share my blanket…”

“I think that’s OUR blanket, babe.”

“Possession is nine tenths of the law, love. I know you know that.” Lance tsked, “but my offer to share still stands…” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, making Keith laugh.

“Alright,” he agreed, “you get set up with the puzzle, I’ll make us some spiked cocoa.”

“Yes! Best hubby ever!”

“Are you talking about me? Or patting yourself on the back?” he teased.

“A little of column a, little of column b,” Lance shot back.

It took four rounds of spiked hot chocolate, and a fair bit of good natured squabbling to complete the puzzle. When they’d pressed the final piece into place, the image on the puzzle changed. What had been a simple geometric pattern of softly shifting colors morphed into a holographic image of the ice cliffs, a flock of those swans taking flight and dissipating into twinkling lights that lingered in the air for a moment.

“Wow,” Lance breathed, his face flushed, eyes bright, features soft and relaxed from the buzz they’d gotten from the hot chocolate, flickering light from the fire dancing over his face and hair. “Soooo beautiful…”

“Yeah,” Keith agreed, heat coiling in his gut, skin crackling from being so close to Lance, curled into the same blanket, brushing and bumping against each other for the last couple of hours. “Gorgeous…”

Lance turned his face, it looked like he’d been about to say something, when he’d caught the expression on Keith’s face. Keith could watch the realization that he hadn’t been looking anywhere near the hologram when he’d agreed wash over Lance’s face in a sweep of color. The flush from the alcohol deepened into a true blush, those blue eyes darting away and then back again, “did you even see what the puzzle did?”

“Mmhmm,” he nodded, “kinda… corner of my eye…” He reached out to trace his fingers along Lance’s jawline, smiling when Lance let his eyes drift shut in a very long blink and sighed.

“You know,” Lance whispered, wrapping his arms around Keith under the blanket, “technically, we are still newlyweds…”

“Mmmm?” He tipped his face up to Lance’s.

“Mmmhmmm… and newlyweds are kind of notorious for not being able to keep their hands off each other…”

“Ahhh… yeah… that… is a thing that is true…”

“And it’s not like we can really GO anywhere…” Lance’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“Not safely, anyway,” Keith agreed, inching closer, “and we have a limited supply of firewood…”

“Very true… we should,” his gaze settled on Keith’s mouth, his own tongue peeking out to lick his lips, “do all we can to… conserve heat…”

Keith nodded slowly, completely mesmerized by Lance’s face, “keep each other warm…”

“Yeah. That.” And then Lance was kissing him and they were falling back onto the plush rug in in front of the fire all hungry kisses and lazy caresses… and by the time either of them was ready to pay any attention to anything but each other, the snow had been cleared- much earlier than expected.

If they rushed, they might just be able to get to Cuba before midnight. Maybe. Keith slid into the pilot seat in Black’s cockpit and rolled his eyes at Black’s almost teasing reaction to his emotional state. “Stuff it, Kitty. I’m a newlywed. I’m supposed to be lovestruck,” he muttered, getting situated.

“Keith?” Lance’s face popped up on the display in front of him. “There was a gift on my seat when I got here. Is this from you? Or did someone find some way into Red?”

“It’s from me,” Keith answered, smiling, “Kosmo played Santa for me.”

“You want me to open it now?” Lance asked, beaming.

“Up to you,” Keith answered, “it’s nothing that NEEDS to be private, if that’s what you are wondering.”

“Then I think I’ll wait,” he answered, chewing at his lip as if he was second guessing himself. “Let’s get home.”

About halfway back to Earth, Lance popped up on Keith’s display again, “when did you find the time to get this!?!”

Keith laughed, “I thought you said you were going to wait?”

“I DID wait,” Lance huffed, “we are halfway home! Now, answer me!”

“I asked Rigrill about it when we were leaving. He said the gift shop had a bunch. I bought one, the shop wrapped it, Kosmo dropped it off- all while we were walking back to the Lions. You like it?”

“Babe! I love it. That was the coolest puzzle I ever saw,” Lance gushed, “and I like… having… a reminder…” Lance flushed adorably.

Keith smiled, “good. Me, too. I really liked our first Christmas Eve as a married couple.”

“Aww, you’re being all romantic on me and I can’t even kiss you right now. Evil, wonderful man.”

“I feel so loved,” Keith teased.

“You should,” Lance replied, his voice soft and loaded with emotion, “because you are. So loved.”

“I know,” he answered, softly, “I DO know, I never doubt it… and so are you.”

“I never doubt it, either.”

[jenatwork]

Mental illness and self-care at work

 I’ve had more than one person (including my doctor, ugh) suggest to me that, since I hold down a full-time (and fairly high-level) job, my mental illness can’t be all that bad.

Not true. It’s not uncommon for people with mental illnesses to work full-time, to reach high levels of management or be self-employed and successful. I’m lucky to have a job that I genuinely like, working for an NPO, and my job is my reason for getting out of bed in the morning. In previous jobs, I absolutely have been unwilling to get up or leave the house, taken long stretches of sick-leave or resigned when a job wouldn’t enable me to take time off when I needed it. And even in this job that I love, I struggle a lot, and often can’t do much in the evenings when I get home.

The reason I get by at work is because I’ve developed a ton of self-care strategies and coping mechanisms so that even when I’m tearing myself up inside, I can still get shit done.

 1.       Dress for work.

My job has a fairly relaxed dress code, and if I want to wear jeans and a T-shirt I actually can (and sometimes do). But on days when I’m wearing a button-down shirt or a smart dress, it makes me feel ‘managerial’. It puts me in a work-ready frame of mind before I even leave the house. In previous jobs where I had a uniform, I felt better when my uniform looked good – shirt ironed, smart shoes, and so on. I’m not at work to get a date; I’m here to lead my team and run my shop, and looking the part is like putting on a costume to get me into character.

 2.       Wear stuff you like.

Having said all that, wearing a bit of jewellery or a pair of socks that make me smile helps too! So I’ll wear my button-down shirt, but I’ll wear a pair of dinosaur earrings, or a Pride wristband, or my BMO socks, and get a little reminder of something that makes me smile. My Line Manager actually notices and makes positive comments (I’m lucky to have a Line Manager who appreciates that I’m unapologetically nerdy). If you can’t wear pierced jewellery, wear character socks or a tie-pin or put a keychain on your bag.

 3.       Take packed lunches.

Even if it’s a sandwich you made five minutes before you left the house, it can be a reminder that you did something positive to take care of yourself. When I’m feeling well, I take time to make elaborate decobento boxes or try new recipes. When I’m doing okay, I do meal-prep while making my dinner in the evening (or make extra and pack up the left-overs). When I’m not doing well, I have packets of ramen and small cans of veggies that I can heat up in the microwave at work. Taking even a few minutes to plan ahead and save a bit of money makes me feel like I’ve got some control and am looking after myself. Also, as I have ASD, I have issues with food choice, and if I have to buy a sandwich at the supermarket and they don’t have what I like I can have a full-on meltdown before I even get to work, so packed lunches eliminate that possibility.

 4.       Have healthy snacks available.

Obviously this isn’t possible for everyone, but if you have an office or a break-room and can keep your own food, it helps. I keep cereal and a pack of dried fruit in my office for when I couldn’t manage to make breakfast or if I forget my packed lunch or just want to keep myself from raiding the staff biscuit tin. Eating healthy food regularly also means your brain has fuel to work and focus.

 5.       Use a planner.

I started bullet journaling two years ago, and it’s had a big impact on managing my mental health. As well as helping to organise work stuff, I have spaces for doodling and bullet journaling, so if things get too much I can sit at my desk and have five minutes just putting the bad thoughts down on paper. It probably looks a bit overly dramatic when I read it back later, but at the time, it really helps me to put my thoughts in order and get some stuff out of my system. Plus it’s a way to switch off from work but still look like I’m doing something productive if anyone walks by my office!

 6.       Delegate tasks.

If you’re a supervisor, team leader or manager, trying to do everything yourself can be tempting. My mental illness often makes me feel like I’m worthless if I’m not doing everything myself, but then if I do too much I tire myself out and literally can’t do anything. So I’ve had to work hard to learn to delegate stuff to my team. But I’ve realised that delegating actually helps to remind myself that I’m in charge and I’m managing a team, not just running a business. It takes a bit of effort sometimes to train staff to do something they haven’t done before, but training someone on one specific task saves you a ton of time and energy in the future when you can hand the job to them (or even get them to train someone else!)

 7.       Personalise your work space.

Again, this doesn’t work for everyone. I have a tiny cubbyhole of an office with no door so anyone can walk in at any time. But I have a couple of photographs of my niece pinned up above my computer. Three years ago, when I was at my absolute lowest, the one thing that kept me from killing myself was thinking that I’d never get to see my niece grow up. I also collect little plastic dinosaurs on a bit of empty shelf space, and sometimes my staff even bring one to add to the collection!

 8.       Take breaks.

If you’re bound to take breaks when you’re told to, make the most of them. Have something to read or something relaxing to do (not video games – give your eyes a screen break and enjoy time passing slowly for a while). Sit away from your usual work space. This one is tough for me because we don’t have a break room and I can’t really leave the building, so I switch off my monitor and read or write in my planner.

 9.       Work in short bursts.

When I’m really struggling mentally, I can’t focus on anything for very long. So I work on one thing for about half an hour, then move to a different part of the shop and do something else. I take short breaks – maybe five minutes – then go back to task for another half hour or so.

 10.   Record your achievements.

I do this in my planner, but anywhere you can keep a list works. It’s especially useful on those days when I’m working in short bursts. Even if it’s stuff like ‘answered an e-mail’ or ‘submitted supplies order’, stuff I do daily, having that reminder that I’m getting stuff done helps to keep me motivated.

 11.   Encourage and appreciate others.

Honestly, this is the one I often find the hardest. When my mood is low and I’m isolated from friends, find the mental energy to praise other people seems almost impossible. But it keeps my team motivated and means they’ll work hard even if I’m not. I find that delegating tasks is easiest if my team feel like I’m someone they want to work for. Plus saying positive things to others can help lift my mood when I see them feeling encouraged.

 None of this stuff is intended to be a magical quick-fix. It’s stuff that requires mental and physical effort. I don’t do all of them all of the time (I wore jeans and a T-shirt at work today, and I’m really struggling with the ‘encouraging others’ bit lately since my mood has been particularly low). But putting in that effort is an investment in both my job and my mental health. Yes, it does often leave me exhausted by the end of the day. But putting the effort into my job means I build my sense of self-worth (when I’m unwell and my friends aren’t reaching out to me, I remind myself that my job benefits tons of other people). It means I can pay my bills, and live independently, and have money to do fun stuff when I am feeling well.

I realise this isn’t ‘fairy lights and blanket forts’ fluffy self-care, but I hope this shows it’s possible to hold down a job with a mental illness (and also serves as a reminder that your colleagues who seem like they’ve got their shit together might actually be struggling as well).

[jaemtens]

Rescue (Chapter 7)

seventeen | junhao | side meanie / vernkwan | chapter 6 of 10 | 27.9k

tumblr links: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 ao3 links: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

written with @rendawnie | updates every saturday morning

summary:  When Soonyoung finally “agrees” to let Junhui get a dog for their apartment, he realizes that he needed something a little bit more than a puppy. Enter Minghao, the bona fide Bad Boy™ with tattoos and piercings. Oh, and he doodles puppies and kittens in their Probability and Confirmation class.

chapter 7: junhui

After that, Junhui didn’t leave his apartment, or his room, for nearly three days.

It was probably an overdramatic response. He was very aware of that.

Soonyoung was aware too, judging by how often he banged on Junhui’s door as loud as he could when he walked by, and also how he refused to continue delivering Junhui’s meals to his room instead of making him come down to the kitchen table to eat them, after the first day.

It was just...Junhui had never felt so embarrassed in his life. He’d never screwed up this royally, or accidentally, or humiliating...ly.

If he’d known, if he’d had any inkling whatsoever of Minghao’s situation, he would have done so many things differently. All of the things, maybe. He could see now how many times he’d said insensitive things, how often he’d made mistakes. He never wanted to hurt Minghao’s feelings, and it seemed that, through misunderstandings and missteps alike, that was all he’d managed to do. And so, that being the case, Junhui saw no other appropriate course of action but to sequester himself in his room, where he couldn’t be a danger to society at large. Especially the most handsome members of it.

Two days passed. Junhui still didn’t have any answers. He didn’t know what he’d expected.

As embarrassed as Junhui was, he knew that Minghao was probably even more so. Junhui wanted to find him, to tell him that he didn’t care at all what Minghao’s situation was, except to try and help him if he could. But, that just wasn’t going to be possible, and Junhui understood why. It was a matter of pride, for Minghao. Junhui couldn’t go to the shelter. He was positive Minghao wouldn’t want him there. (He was also pretty positive Minghao wouldn’t want him anywhere, currently, and that thought made him sadder than he was ready to admit.)

When Junhui finally got out of bed, finally forced himself out of his room and out of the apartment, he decided to go to the library on campus, to maybe get some studying done. He was aware that he’d been neglecting his classes and education in a massive way, and it was starting to make him feel guilty. So, he ended up on the second floor of the large building late one night, so late that he was probably the only one there. He was happy about that part. The less people around him, the less he would have to try and pretend he was okay with anything currently happening in his life.

He had just flipped open his Probability and Confirmation text, and dug out the extra large bag of homemade trail mix Soonyoung had made him, because even if he couldn’t express it, Junhui knew his best friend cared about him a lot, when Junhui realized that he was, in fact, not alone in the library.

He wasn’t alone, but he had been so distracted by digging out each and every M&M Soonyoung had thrown into his trail mix that he didn’t even notice someone sort of hovering in his orbit awkwardly, waiting to be acknowledged.

Finally, there was a clearing of the throat, and Junhui looked up, mouth full of red M&Ms (Soonyoung knew they were the only color Junhui would eat) and eyes wide.

There was a cute guy standing next to Junhui, sort of. He was far enough away to be respectful, but close enough that Junhui was fairly sure he wanted to talk about something. Or maybe just stand there, being quietly adorable. Either/or. He looked familiar, but Junhui couldn’t quite figure out why. The guy didn’t try to say anything, at first. He seemed content enough to let Junhui squint up at him, trying to figure out where he’d seen him before. The guy waited patiently for what could have been entire minutes, until Junhui sorted it out in his head.

Junhui had seen Minghao in the library several times before, and this guy was always with him. At first, Junhui had thought they were just acquaintances, but finally, over the course of several ogling sessions (study sessions. Study sessions.), Junhui had figured out that the guy was actually tutoring Minghao. If only Junhui were as lucky to have a tutor who looked like that, instead of Soonyoung, whose attention span tended to last just long enough to get through one or two flashcards worth of notes.

If only Junhui were lucky, maybe he could be the one tutoring Minghao. On whatever subject he wanted. Any subject, really. Junhui would probably have tried to learn Russian, if Minghao needed him to.

Anyway.

The guy must have noticed the wheels in Junhui’s brain slow to a steady pace, once he stopped thinking so hard, because he smiled and spoke for the first time, in a light, lilting voice. “Hi. I’m Joshua. I’m Xu Minghao’s tutor. You’re Jun, right?”

Junhui blinked. “Uh… yes? How did you know that?”

Joshua furrowed his brow, as if he was trying to figure out a way to answer that question that wouldn’t incriminate anyone. Junhui sort of very much hoped it would incriminate the shit out of Minghao, even though knowing how Minghao felt about him wouldn’t change the fact that he currently wanted nothing to do with Junhui.

“Oh. Um… I guess Minghao just mentioned you sitting near him, in a class. Maybe. Once or twice,” Joshua replied, fumbling over the words, while Junhui frowned harder and harder. Minghao had mentioned him to his tutor. He wondered what exactly the context had been.

Haha yeah, there’s this huge fuckin’ nerd that sits next to me in Prob and Conf. I can hardly concentrate, his dorkitude is so loud, he could imagine Minghao saying.

Or maybe, I tried to talk to this idiot and he basically ate his own face the entire time, until it became so unbearable that I literally had to run away from him to save us both the humiliation.

Both of those seemed like reasonable options.

“Oh,” Junhui mumbled after a while. “Okay?” He really wasn’t sure where Joshua was going with this, or if he wanted to go along with him.

Joshua cleared his throat again, sitting down in the chair across from Junhui, chin in his hands. “I haven’t seen Minghao in several weeks,” he said. “I’m getting a bit worried.”

“Oh,” Junhui repeated, feeling a little dumb. “I haven’t seen him, either. He hasn’t been coming to our class for about that long.”

Joshua looked even more concerned. “I’ve tried to get ahold of him, but he’s not answering emails. I don’t have his phone number. I wondered if you might have it?”

Junhui couldn’t help snorting. “Why? He doesn’t want to talk to me. Probably ever again.”

Joshua frowned.  “Well, that doesn’t make sense. He--” Just as quickly as he’d begun speaking, Joshua stopped himself. Junhui watched him regroup silently. He didn’t know what to say, what to do about anything anymore. Maybe there wasn’t anything he could do.

After a few moments, Joshua licked his lips and nodded once, getting up from the table with his mouth set in a straight line, instead of the smile he’d given Junhui at the beginning of their conversation. “Listen, just… if you see him, will you let me know? Here’s my number,” Joshua said, tearing a sheet out of Junhui’s open notebook without permission and stealing his pen to write on it. Junhui didn’t protest. He was too lost in thought.

“You can give it to Minghao,” Joshua told Junhui, straightening up and setting the pen back down next to Junhui’s notebook. “Just…” he started, and then he trailed off, thinking again. “Just tell him I’m worried about him and I’m here to help if he needs it, okay?” Joshua finished, pushing his hands into his pockets.

Junhui stared at Joshua’s number numbly. “Okay,” he muttered, not raising his eyes to Joshua again. He sat there staring at it so long that eventually, Joshua just sort of wandered away.

Junhui felt sick. He was so confused, and now he was worried about Minghao on top of everything else, and he still didn’t know what to do about any of it. All of his thinking was getting him nowhere, and also, it was giving him a headache.

He couldn’t even study, after that. Junhui just sat in the library, alone, for another fifteen minutes, looking at the torn piece of paper in front of him, and then he gathered his things, using Joshua’s number as a bookmark in his Probability and Confirmation textbook, and walked home.

*

Somehow, Junhui managed to make it there in one piece, despite the fact that his head was down the entire time, gazing into the proverbial, infinite void that his life had become. He didn’t look up at all, even as he climbed the steps to the door of his apartment building, pressed the number for his floor on the elevator, and rode it up. He didn’t look up from his shoes, not even once, until he was in front of Mingyu and Wonwoo’s door.

Junhui glanced down the hall at his own apartment, just a few doors down. Mingyu and Wonwoo had only recently moved into the same building as Junhui and Soonyoung, and he’d never actually been over to their place. Or invited over. Fleetingly, Junhui wondered what time it was. He was sure it was probably way too late to knock on the door, way too late for polite company, or desperate advice, or whatever in the hell he was considering asking for.

He was saved from his own thoughts by the door in front of him swinging open without preamble.

Mingyu wore a wide grin and his pajamas as he leaned against the doorframe, regarding Junhui. “Hey, man. You gonna stand out there all night?” he asked pleasantly. Junhui blinked several times.

From inside the apartment, Junhui heard Wonwoo’s voice. He could also hear the eyeroll in Wonwoo’s voice, the one that was sort of always there, whether it was intentional or not. Junhui could understand. Mingyu was kind of a handful, if their class together was anything to  go by.

“Just come in, Jun. Close the door behind you, you’re letting out all the bought air,” Wonwoo called, and Mingyu took a step back so that Junhui could slip in. Once the door was shut behind him, as Wonwoo had ordered, and he was standing in the front hallway with Mingyu, his taller companion grinned again.

“I’m off to bed. You can hang out with the night owl,” Mingyu said, jerking his head toward the kitchen, where Wonwoo presumably was. “Later, dude.” Mingyu yawned, shuffling away to the bedroom as Junhui peered into the dimly lit apartment.

“In the kitchen,” Wonwoo confirmed a second later, and Junhui followed the sound of his voice, creeping through the apartment carefully. The last thing he needed at a time like this was to knock over some precious object with his clumsy limbs, something probably irreplaceable and expensive. He didn’t know why Wonwoo and Mingyu would have anything like that, really. Junhui was just prepared to continue being a total and complete human disaster for the forseeable future, so it seemed to go with the territory.

Thankfully, he made it to the small kitchen unscathed, and so did all of Mingyu and Wonwoo’s possessions. Wonwoo was sitting at the table, glasses on and reading a book quietly, but he glanced up when Junhui started hovering in the entrance uncertainly.

“God, you’re so fucking awkward. Sit down,” Wonwoo said with exasperation, getting up to go into the kitchenette. “How do you take your coffee?” he asked, pouring two cups from the steaming pot on the counter.

Junhui wrinkled his nose, finally pulling out his phone and checking the time, like he’d meant to do before. “Wonwoo, it’s one o’clock in the morning,” Junhui said, tossing the phone onto the table and sitting down obediently.

Wonwoo chuckled, throwing him a glance. “Like I said. How do you take your coffee?” he repeated, separating each word as if it was a whole new sentence and staring a hole into Junhui’s forehead, suddenly.

“Milkshake,” Junhui replied meekly, and then he slumped over in his chair and waited for his drink.

Less than two minutes later, Junhui had a milkshake in front of him, a cup full of milk and sugar and not a lot of coffee, and Wonwoo had his pure, unadulterated beverage, and as Wonwoo took the first sip, he regarded Junhui thoughtfully. “So. What are you doing here?”

Junhui groaned. “I don’t know. Just... falling apart, I guess.”

Wonwoo squinted at him. “Go on.”

Junhui could feel all the words bubbling up, all the things he’d been worrying about and stuffing down and worrying about and kicking to the side for weeks, since Minghao. He could also feel things from before that, crap that had been bothering him for ages that he’d tried to compartmentalize. Spoiler alert: compartmentalization was not one of Wen Junhui’s very limited skills.

“Okay, because like… I haven’t done this before. Like, ever,” Junhui started, staring at his hands wrapped around the coffee mug. “I haven’t even been out to my friends for that long, and I’ve never actually dated anyone since I came out, and…” He stopped, biting his lip. “I’ve never likedanyone enough to want to date them. And now I like Minghao. I like him so much.” By the time Junhui stopped talking, his voice was almost at a whisper. Wonwoo was just watching him quietly. It was unnerving.

“I like him so much, and I’m just screwing everything up. Everything I do seems to make him mad,” Junhui huffed out, feeling himself blush. “I’m trying so hard to be cool, but I’m not cool, and--”

“No, you’re really not,” Wonwoo said dryly.

Junhui rolled his eyes. “So supportive. So helpful.” Wonwoo snickered.

“Anyway, I just… I feel like I can’t do anything right. The harder I try, the worse everything gets. And now he like, monumentally hates me, or whatever, and I don’t even know why!” Junhui exclaimed, banging his fists on the table lightly in frustration. “I don’t know why.”

He picked up his coffee cup and took a long swig, barely noticing how hot it was on his tongue. Junhui sighed after he’d swallowed the sweet liquid down, trying to figure out where to go next. He supposed it didn’t actually matter, because nothing he’d said so far had made any sense, anyway.

“I just want another chance. Like, a real chance. I want to fix whatever I did wrong, but I can’t,” Junhui said.

“Why can’t you?” Wonwoo asked. As if it were that simple.

“It’s not that simple,” Junhui bit out. “I can’t just… okay, like. Please, please, for the love of god, don’t tell anyone this, but…” Junhui paused, unsure if he should tell Minghao’s secret, but… it was important to the story, he figured. “Minghao’s homeless. He lives in a shelter.”

When Junhui raised his eyes to meet Wonwoo, his companion looked calm. “I know,” he replied straightforwardly.

Junhui threw up his hands in disbelief. “What the hell?! Did everyone know this but me??” he shouted, and then he looked back in the direction of the bedroom guiltily.

Wonwoo chuckled. “Don’t worry. Mingyu sleeps like the dead.”

Junhui nodded a little. He gave himself a three second break before he went on. “How did you know?” he asked, quieter.

Wonwoo sighed, looking away. “Mingyu and I were out doing our grocery shopping a few months ago, and we saw him bringing a box or two into the shelter across the street from the store,” he told Junhui. “At first, we assumed he was just helping someone take their stuff inside, but when we came out of the store, he was sitting by the front desk filling out paperwork.”

Junhui frowned. “That’s not exactly a sure bet as far as clues go,” he muttered, and Wonwoo shrugged, nodding.

“It’s not,” he agreed. “But then, we saw him again a couple weeks later, in the morning. He came out of the shelter looking like he’d just showered. I’d guess he was probably going to work,” Wonwoo mused. “That’s when we started to figure it out.”

Junhui’s jaw dropped. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

Wonwoo gave him a disapproving frown. “Because it’s none of our business. He obviously doesn’t want anyone to know, or he would go around telling everyone he met. Sometimes you just have to leave things alone, Jun.”

Junhui shook his head so hard that it gave him a headache. “No. I can’t. I can’t leave him alone, Wonwoo. I want to help him,” he protested, hearing how his voice started to rise in pitch frantically.

Looking at Junhui seriously, Wonwoo considered his next words before he said them. “I get that, Jun. I really do. But…” he began, stopping to sip his coffee before he went on, “Minghao seems like he has a lot of pride,” Wonwoo said, echoing Junhui's thoughts from earlier. “A lot of pride that can be easily wounded. You get what I’m saying?”

Junhui sighed. “Yeah.” He did get it. He just hated the idea of it, suddenly. He thought for a moment, before turning his face back to Wonwoo. “Do you think I’ve fucked it up forever?” Junhui asked.

Wonwoo laughed quietly. “Nah. You can’t fuck something up that hasn’t even started, Jun.”

Crossing his arms, Junhui frowned. “It sure feels like I can,” he muttered.

Wonwoo rolled his eyes. “Don’t be so dramatic, dude. It’s fine. You haven’t burnt any imaginary bridges.”

Junhui chewed on his bottom lip, thinking. “Then… what do I do? How can I fix it, when he’s up and disappeared off the face of the earth?” he asked, his mind running through all the possibilities at top speed.

Wonwoo stretched, getting up from the table to refill his coffee cup. Junhui honestly had no idea how Wonwoo functioned so normally, with this schedule and these habits. Junhui had only had one cup of late night/early morning coffee (okay, with a lot more sugar than Wonwoo preferred), and he was already starting to get the shakes.

Granted, a lot of that nervous energy might have been to do with the Minghao Situation. But, Junhui was suddenly manifesting the ability to compartmentalize enough to convince himself that they were two totally separate entities. A very healthy approach, he thought smugly to himself as he waited for Wonwoo to reply.

When he sat down again with a freshly filled to the top coffee cup, Wonwoo clasped his hands together on the table in front of them, and between that and the glasses starting to slip down his nose ever so slightly, he was beginning to look like any number of Junhui’s professors. Hopefully, what Junhui would learn from Wonwoo would be a lot more helpful in his daily life. Even if it just helped for one day. One day and one chance were all he needed.

“I think you need to go to the shelter, Jun. You need to make a gesture,” Wonwoo decided finally.

Junhui swallowed, hard. “He doesn’t want me there,” he said softly, even though part of him begged to be heard, telling him otherwise.

Wonwoo shook his head. “I think he does, deep down. Even if he doesn’t want you there, per se, he wants you. He wants to know you care. He wants to know you don’t care about his situation, or that at the very least, you don’t judge him for it,” Wonwoo said wisely. Junhui leaned forward, listening carefully.

“Just go, and be honest with him. Make him listen to you. Try your best, and I think you’ll finally get through to him,” Wonwoo advised. “And if you don’t…” he trailed off, regarding Junhui. “At least you can say you tried. That’s all you can ever ask of yourself, Jun.”

Normally, Junhui wasn’t a crier. He was pretty reserved in his emotions. But something about this whole thing, this whole Minghao thing, was pulling at his heartstrings in a way he’d never experienced before. He’d had approximately five hysterical meltdowns over Minghao so far, and suddenly, before Junhui even realized it was happening, it became six.

To Wonwoo’s credit, he didn’t make fun of Junhui for it. He just pushed their chairs next to each other at the table and read his book in silence while Junhui cried on his shoulder until he couldn’t cry anymore, patting his shoulder every so often in between turning the pages of his book.

By the time Junhui finally left, it was three in the morning, he’d had two more cups of sugary sweet coffee, and his eyes hurt from all the crying he’d done, but he felt lighter. He felt hopeful.

He felt determined.

[peculiar-bonds]

Out of Sight, Not Out of Mind: Chapter 6 - Reawakening (ENDING)

Synopsis: While Mane 6 are on a research mission in a small town from another world called 'Earth', they learn about an old myth among the inhabitants: the Slender Man. What is the ugly truth of this haunted town? Will they survive the monster's deadly grasps?

It was a gruesome night for the girls…

Slender Man decided not to show any mercy anymore towards his intruders. They were too many this time, and all of them had to die by his hands. Except for one of them. Kate. Even if she stood in front of him, quite close, he didn’t touch a strand of her hair. Absolutely none. They stared at each other for a long time, and Kate knew what was going on. He was trying to communicate with her.

“I have plans for you, Kate…” the faceless monster told her in her head, with a deep and terrifying voice.

Kate couldn’t stand the pain. Every word that he said felt like a migraine.

“Then why are you hurting them instead? LEAVE THEM ALONE! I’M SICK OF YOUR SHIT!” Kate screams, still unable to stand on her feet.

“Human pest. They’re all standing in my way…” Slender Man telepathically replied to the human hostage.

Kate was in even more pain. She almost curled up into a ball, and yelled among the other ones in danger. “SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

Meanwhile, Twilight was watching the entire scene, and quickly realised that all of this was a distraction. She couldn’t bear the prolonged bloodcurdling screams of her friends, who were slowly strangled by the appendages of the tall monster. But she had no choice, the ‘game’ had to stop; the last page might be the only escape. So she sprinted as hard as she could to the last landmark, while avoiding Slender’s direct attacks. Twilight might not have been the athlete of the group, but she was small, and it definitely gave her an advantage against Slender Man. The captured ones couldn’t resist for much longer; the tendrils were strong enough to break a human’s bones, but they were suffocating them instead. Slender Man preferred to give a slow and painful death to his victims. On the other side, Twilight reached the final destination: the big and leafless tree. The last page was placed on its trunk and the message was “DON’T LOOK, OR IT TAKES YOU”, written in the same style as the others, also containing a small doodle of Slender Man in the down right corner and an X in the upper right corner. Before she could even grab the paper, she felt a sudden stab of pain in her back. She gasped, and looked down. A tentacle pierced her right through the spine, bleeding all over the grass. The pain was unreal, the vision blurred,and death was on its way.

“I’m…sorry…”

The other girls, including Kate, witnessed Twilight’s last breaths in utter shock.

“NOOOOOOOOO!” Pinkie screamed with tears in her eyes, sobbing loudly.

But her cries made Slender Man even madder, and Pinkie was about to have the same fate as Twilight. He impaled her without any remorse, crimson blood oozing from the hole in her body. The creature quickly retracted his tentacle from Pinkie’s corpse and dropped her as if she was a ragdoll. This time, the others didn’t dare to make a sound. The fear was getting stronger and their breaths were getting louder. Each one of them was panting intensely, internally mourning the loss of their friends. Even Kate didn’t make a single move; the headache from before was too traumatising to handle. Slender Man was glaring at all of them, and all of them looked at him in fear, when suddenly, Rainbow Dash’s adrenaline bursted out.

“LET US GO! UGH!” she snapped.

“Rainbow, don’t!” Kate warned.

But it was too late; Slender Man’s tentacles already gripped her neck and strangled it with brutal force. The athletic girl tried opposing resistance, but it was futile; the faceless one was way more powerful. The rest of the girls that were left were watching in pure horror as their dear friend died under the tentacles’ pressure.

They were aware it was their turn. There was no escape. Thus, Slender Man started torturing all of them at once. Applejack and Rarity were also strangled to death,while Fluttershy was impaled, spitting blood from her mouth.

It was a grisly sight for Kate. She was helpless and too weak to stand a chance. Soon enough, Mane 6 collapsed on the ground, limp and lifeless. But there was more; Kate might have been alive, but she was still trapped. She started running in the other direction and look for an alternate escape. But it was no use, because Slender used his tendrils to catch her and lift her up to his level, just like he did before. The girl was petrified; she just couldn’t say anything to confront the monster. It was all over…

Out of nowhere, the other side of the forest was glowing with orange lights. These light beams weren’t ordinary, they were accompanied by several unknown voices. Just like they were alive…

On the landmarks, something unusual happened as well. The Cutie Marks of the Equestrian Girls were magically carved into most of these landmarks, with neon-like traces. The rocks were marked with Rarity’s symbol, the walls with Fluttershy’s, the restroom with Applejack’s, the tanks with Rainbow Dash’s, the tunnel with Pinkie’s, and finally, the tree with Twilight’s.

The orange lights spread across the forest until they reached the corpses of Mane 6. The bright strange lights surrounded the lifeless bodies, lifting them up in the air. Slender Man paused, and Kate was completely stunned. Not only that, the bizarre beams started healing and reviving the girls, while they also formed the everlasting Elements of Harmony: Generosity, Kindness, Honesty, Loyalty, Laughter and Magic.

“What is happening?” Kate muttered, feeling like she was dreaming.

Meanwhile, the girls woke up, glancing at their surroundings.

“No way!” Twilight exclaimed, completely puzzled.

Suddenly, the magic around Mane 6 grabbed Kate from Slender Man’s grasp. The creature tried to get her again, but Twilight involuntarily formed a magic shield that rejected the tentacles.

“Tara, is that you?” Kate wondered, believing that her insanity had progressed.

“Yes, Kate, it’s us, your friends,” Twilight replied with convincement.

At last, Mane 6 made their final move, All of them rose their hands in the air, then pointed them at Slender Man, who was angry that he couldn’t do anything about all of this. His tentacles were still coiling in mid-air, surprisingly showing fear.

Out of each girl’s hand burst out a colourful beam of magic. Inover a few seconds, there were six distinctly-coloured beams that hit the faceless monster; suprisingly, they caused him unbearable pain and agony, signaled by his monstrous scream. For the first time in humanity’s history, Slenderman was completely defeated. He melted and disintegrated into oblivion, then he exploded in a luminous rainbow, very similar to the Sonic Rainboom.

Everything faded to black in the moment.

*next morning*

Twilight slowly opened her eyes. The forest never looked so peaceful. It didn’t take a lot for the others to wake up, without any remaining scratch or scar.

“Girls, we did it! We finally did it!” Twilight exclaimed in excitement, then touched her tiara, which was a true miracle. The other girls fet their Elements of Harmony around their necks as well. It was, indeed, a miracle.

“Um, what the heck happened last night?” Rainbow asked, while rubbing her eyes.

“Whatever that was, I’m glad we’re free from him…” Fluttershy admitted.

“Girls, can’t you see? Our Elements of Harmony! They’re back!” Twilight exclaimed again.

“You owe me an explanation, Tara…” Kate added with a smug expression. “But first, we gotta rest for a while. Don’t you agree?”

Mane 6 nodded at Kate’s statement.

“Perfect! Let’s hang out at my house, it’s not far from this place. My mom would be glad to meet you!”

Rainbow and Applejack felt a bit of distrust, but they had no choice, apparently. Their legs couldn’t walk anymore, so the group went towards Kate’s house. When they arrived, they couldn’t believe what they saw. Kate’s house was really big, placed in the heart of the forest. The sight was beautiful, indeed. Right at the threshold, there was Kate’s mother, Beth Hayes; despite her age, her expression was truly youthful, and her red curly locks complimented her appearance. Still, she had a worried look on her face.

“Kate! You’re finally back, my dear!” she ran away to hug her daughter.

“Good morning!” Twilight greeted.

“Are you Kate’s friends? Come in, I have cookies and I’m gonna prepare smoothies for y’all!” Beth said with an inviting tone, then hurried to the kitchen.

Kate shrugged at her mother’s excessive generosity, but she was glad to see her again, after all. Especially after that night. Before making themselves comfortable in the living room, Twilight and Kate had to take all of the Elements of Harmony and hide them in Kate’s room.

“Listen, Kate, I would like you to keep all of them in a safe place. As much as I’d prefer having them at disposal, in my apartment, I still think it’s a huge risk, hence anyone can come in and take them without having any idea how powerful they are…” Twilight explained.

“What’s the deal with these things, if I may ask? You aren’t from this world, aren’t you?”

“No, we aren’t. But you must not tell anyone about this. Not yet. I want you to keep them safe, Kate, because you’re far away from a potential threat. Do you understand?”

“I do. When will I hear the entire story, though?”

“Soon enough. We’ll come again after we get used to all these ‘human stuff’ and explain you everything. But for now, promise me you’ll keep them out from your mom and any stranger that passes by!” the Equestrian demanded.

“Alright, Tara…I promise. And I’ll wait. Just be careful, okay?”

“I will…” Twilight promised as well, then hugged her new friend from Earth. Kate felt it like a huge responsibility at some point, but she had to deal with it nonetheless. At least she had a purpose once in a lifetime.

Meanwhile, the other Equestrian girls had a wonderful time with Beth Hayes. The mother was permanently cheerful and welcoming to her guests, confessing that it had been a long time since someone came to visit her; not even the relatives bothered to check on her and Kate from time to time. But both of them got used to the situation after all.

“This ain’t fair…those people can’t be called ‘family’, ma’am!” Applejack commented.

“We’ll make sure to pay you a few visits, miss Hayes. You’re a very delightful company!” Rarity said with compassion in her voice. “If it’s no bother for you and Kate, of course…”

“Good Lord, Rachael, I would be very happy to see you again! But I hope not in the same circumstance…” Beth replied with genuine warmth in her statement. “Besides, I’m glad to finally see my daughter having a few friends that truly care about her…” the woman sighed, sobbing and crying for a few moments.

Fluttershy rose from the couch and hugged Beth without hesitating. Later on, the others followed her and did the same; the bond was stronger than ever.

Finally, Twilight and Kate came downstairs, witnessing the affectionate moment from before.

“I see you’re getting along…” Twilight said with a smile on her face. “Come on, let’s get back to the town! We still have school to attend!”

“Oh, come on!” Rainbow Dash protested. “Can’t we stay just a few more minutes?”

“No. We’ve got a lot to do, trust me!”

The others also sighed, then exited the house one by one. “Goodbye, Kate! Goodbye, miss Hayes!”

“Wait, sweetie! Let me give you a few cookies. You didn’t eat anything…” Beth insisted, while offering a paper bag filled with chocolate chip cookies to the petite teenager.

Twilight had no time, nor energy to protest. “Thank you very much! Have a great day, miss Hayes! Bye, Kate!” she said while going out with the others.

Mane 6 simultaneously waved at the two humans from behind, who waved back to them. Finally, they left the yard, then the entire forest, heading towards the town on foot. Towards new experiences as humans…

                                                    -THE END-

                                                     (for now)

[invisibletinkerer]

Fic: 30 Seconds Later (chapter 4)

Chapter 1 – Chapter 2 – Chapter 3 -- Chapter 4 -- Chapter 5 -- Chapter 6

Length: ~4000 words

AO3 link.

When Ford closed the bathroom door and turned the lock without another word, Stan could only hope he’d gotten through to him. He found himself leaning back against the wall next to the door and rubbing his temples. Ford was a wreck, that was for sure. But he’d fix that. If only he could have seen it and done something right thirty years ago—

He’d been a bit of a wreck himself thirty years ago. But that was no excuse.

Stan shook his head and pushed himself away from the wall, taking off towards the bedroom. Ford would be alright this time, he’d see to it. Ford was so – so goddamn young. He had all the reason in the world to get through this.

He figured it’d be easiest to give Ford Stan’s own bed for the night. Stan pulled his own sheets and pillowcases off and hid them in the closet before spreading some new linen on the bed – not necessarily neatly, but at least they were clean.

A selection of his brother’s old clothes was in a laundry basket in the corner next to the stove – he’d taken them out of storage and washed them last night when the kids were at the Northwest party. At the time it had been a nervous measure just in case – in case they still fit, and in case his brother needed something to wear temporarily. As it turned out, these were still the clothes Ford expected to own, so it was probably a good thing not all of them were still buried in mothballs. Included was a pair of plaid pajamas, which Stan threw on the bed.

And then there was the demon containment measure. Stan actually owned three pairs of police handcuffs, tucked away in different drawers, though only one of the pairs had its original key. He checked that the key still worked, then put that pair of cuffs on the bed too.

Looking around, Stan grimaced at the mess. Ford wasn’t in any position to judge, of course, and there really wasn’t any point in trying to tidy up, but it’d be best if the demon couldn’t get his hands on anything dangerous from the bed. He moved the bedside table off to the side, then did a circuit around the bed to take away any and all trash – Pitt cans, used napkins, a paperclip, a cracked cup – sheesh – from within reach, before he figured he was done.

When Ford emerged from the bathroom some twenty minutes after closing the door Stan was waiting for him. He’d picked up an issue of Gold Chains for Old Men that was lying around, flipping through it and wondering when in the world he’d ended up in that particular target demographic. Seeing Ford made Stan jump and conspicuously drop the magazine face down on the floor, though Ford didn’t seem to notice or care.

In fact, Ford didn’t seem to notice much at all. He remained unmoving in the doorway for several seconds, one hand on the doorframe for balance, eyes unfocused. He’d put his dirty clothes back on, even the coat, although he’d skipped the tie. The shirt was buttoned up all the way to his chin, and his hair was dripping wet. He hadn’t shaved, and he was still deathly pale, but his face was sort of ruddy from the hot water. Stan supposed the fact that he’d used hot water at all and not tried to shower cold was probably confirmation enough that he’d decided to accept the offer of sleep – which was good, because that one wasn’t negotiable.

“Alright,” Ford said eventually and straightened his back with visible effort. “Let’s do this.”

Stan nodded and motioned towards the bedroom, ready to step in and grab him if he started to fall over, though it didn turn out to be necessary. He still echoed Ford’s soft sigh of relief when they reached the bedroom and Ford sat down on the bed, allowing his shoulders to sag.

Stan threw the pajamas over his brother’s head. “Wanna change out of that outfit?”

Ford pulled it down into his lap and seemed to consider it, then shook his head. “Let’s just get this over with,” he said. “You tie me to the bed and I sleep while Bill is unable to move around.” His eyes flicked to Stan. “And you’ll release me again in the morning.”

“That’s the plan, yeah.” Stan showed him the handcuffs. “I figure that if I cuff one of your wrists to the middle rail of the headboard—” He pointed, “—you’ll still be able to turn in your sleep and whatnot, but Bill won’t be able to go anywhere with you. Sounds good enough?”

Ford didn’t reply except to offer his left wrist for Stan to cuff. When Stan touched his hand, it was trembling.

Stan took a deep breath. “At least take off your coat first,” he reminded his young twin. “There’s blankets if you’re cold.”

Ford nodded and shrugged the coat off, letting it fall in a heap next to the bed.

“And your shoes.” Stan couldn’t believe he was saying this.

There was a hint of a tired smile in Ford’s face – apparently he couldn’t believe it either. He did take his shoes off, then offered his wrist again. The smile disappeared in favor of cold determination. The kind of determination he wouldn’t need if he wasn’t scared.

“You do know that it’s okay, right? I’m not gonna leave you hanging.”

“I know.”

“I’ll be back to check in on you later,” Stan promised. “Or him, as the case may be. And if you need something, just yell.”

“If he talks to you, don’t listen,” Ford said. “Just – don’t.”

“I figured as much.” Bill had already talked to him through Ford once, by the portal, and that had been painful enough. He knew what was going on, now. He casually slid the cuff securely shut around Ford’s wrist. “Now lie down.”

Ford took a deep breath and put his head down on the pillow, his left arm raised to allow Stan to fasten the other cuff to the vertical headboard bar. When it was done he pulled his glasses off with his right hand and gave them to Stan.

Stan put the glasses away on the bedside table. “Well then,” he said, pulling a blanket over his brother’s body because he might as well, “See you later.” He went over to the door, muttering half-loud, “I can’t believe that I’m now the responsible adult between us.”

“Hah,” Ford said weakly from the bed. “Goodnight, Stanley.”

“Goodnight, Stanford.”

Closing the door behind him, Stan realized it was three in the morning and he had no idea what he should do with himself for the rest of the night.

After considering it for a moment, he shrugged and settled for the TV chair.

 * * *

Stanford woke up gasping, his head on an unfamiliar pillow. Echoes of a rapidly fading dream flooded his mind with sensations of profound failure and loss, and for a moment he barely even remembered who he was.

Then he realized he must have been asleep.

Cursing and berating himself to all hells and back, he bolted off the bed – or he tried to, before being pulled back by his left wrist caught in something behind him, his shoulder twisting painfully as he’d tried to move further than the restraint allowed. For a terrifying moment he was convinced Bill had done this to him. He’d lost, everything was lost.

Then he remembered. He let himself sink back against the mattress, trying to breathe.

Stanley. Stanley the old man with the grey hair and the lined face and the unrelenting insistence that he trust him. As a result he was now stuck to a bed, and Bill had not been able to get to the portal or – yes, the rift. It was okay. It was fine. He had not doomed the world by succumbing to sleep. He was held prisoner, yes, but not by malevolence.

Surely not.

He sighed shakily, looking up at the blurry wooden ceiling, and tried to recall the dream. The fact that it was all but gone indicated that it had been exactly that, though – a dream. A mundane nightmare. It was an unfamiliar sensation. Bill’s mindscape visitations were different – they were always lucid for one thing, and tended to be almost as clearly recallable as real-life experiences. Once, not too long ago, he’d have been disappointed at having to deal with his own randomly firing synapses again, but now it was a relief. A dream that wasn’t real.

Ford stayed on his back and slowly felt his heart and lungs return to a more reasonable tempo. Only then did he reluctantly acknowledge the stinging pain. Being hurt was no surprise, of course – he was always in pain these days. Even the fact that his left wrist felt tender and raw was perfectly expected, no doubt the result of a struggle against the cuff during the night. Nevertheless, large swatches of his chest and abdomen hurt in a new way, and he didn’t like it at all.

Part of him simply didn’t want to look. If he didn’t look he could still pretend it was nothing. But he clearly remembered buttoning his shirt up after the shower last night, and just as clearly it was hanging open around him now, so that would have disproven the hypothesis that Bill had left him alone even if there hadn’t been any pain.

He groaned as he forced himself up to sit on the pillow with his back against the bars of the headboard. Looking himself over, he felt his stomach sink.

His torso was stained with red and brown and black from his abdomen to the left shoulder, blood in various stages of coagulation dripping slowly from a myriad of shallow cuts. Some of the cuts seemed to have re-opened when he moved, and probably when he’d tried to scramble off the bed, too. The edges of his white shirt were stained with blood.

And it wasn’t just random cuts. Bill had been... doodling. Ford’s skin was carved with a multitude of roughly equilateral triangles of different sizes, making an irregular pattern covering most of his stomach, chest and across to his left shoulder. Most of the triangles were plain, but a few included an eye, and even little limbs. The cuts were deep enough to hurt, probably to scar, but not to cause any real damage.

The message was crystal clear.

He could hear Bill’s unearthly laughter in the back of his mind, and he shuddered violently.

Ford forced himself take a deep breath. Then another. And a third, frantically trying to convince himself not to give up breathing altogether. He felt sick. Bill was trying to rattle him, and it worked – it always worked. He’d given his own bodily autonomy away, and he wasn’t going to be allowed to forget it. But for a moment he’d imagined – he’d hoped – that nothing would happen. That Bill couldn’t hurt him tonight. Of course Bill was going to pull something like this to prove him wrong.

He wanted to get up and pace the room. He wanted to hide himself under three layers of sweaters, never see his own skin again. The shower yesterday had been bad enough, but the older marks had never been so large, or so... pictographic. He was owned, and he’d stay that way for the rest of his life, and he knew that. He still had to fight.

He settled for using his available hand to close the shirt he was wearing. There were more stains bleeding through. He was shaking again, and he couldn’t stop.

It didn’t matter. It was completely inconsequential. Bill had been stopped from endangering the world, or even threatening anyone else. Stanford was only paying for his own mistakes. It didn’t matter.

He wished he knew where Bill had gotten his hands on a knife. None of Stanley’s drawers or shelves were reachable from his restrained position, and Ford’s bitten-down nails were hardly sharp enough to be responsible for these cuts. Of course, Stanley could have left some sharp object lying within reach on the floor.

Stanley could have done that on purpose.

He wouldn’t.

It would help if he could at least see the tool Bill had used, but he couldn’t. As far as he could make out of his immediate surrounding without glasses, there was nothing. And Stanley had placed his glasses out of reach on the bedside table.

How long had he been asleep? Bill must have had some time on his hands to do this. The stained-glass window was letting in more than enough light to see by, so it had to be past sunrise. Wasn’t Stanley supposed to check on him?

He tugged at the handcuff without thinking, hissing as he the hard metal frame of the restraint rubbed against his already raw wrist. He was trapped.

He’d agreed to this, too.

He was helpless.

Ford swallowed and pulled the blanket up around himself where he sat, struggling to arrange it around himself while only having the use of one hand. He wasn’t going to panic, he was not going to panic.

The journal. It was still in his coat pocket on the floor, just within reach. Getting it and the pen up on the bed one-handed was a bit of a fight, but one that he was able to win. He needed to finish the calculations he’d started last night on the temporo-spacial properties of the portal and the formation of the rift. Perhaps he could even deduce some of the rift’s more specific properties, making it possible to formulate some options for neutralizing it.

He had to do something.

 Some time later – though he hadn’t managed to do more than confirm known facts and discard some of the more outrageous ideas that came to mind (don’t throw the rift into the bottomless pit: high risk of spacial paradox) – when the door to the bedroom opened, slowly and quietly, as if someone was trying to sneak inside without disturbing. Ford dropped the pen immediately, leaning back and pulling the blanket up to his chin, hiding the bloodstains.

A gray-haired blur stopped in the doorway, most likely to process the fact that Ford was obviously not asleep. “Stanford?” It was a question.

“Yes,” Ford said. “It’s me. But check my eyes and don’t take my word for it.”

Stanley came closer and did just that. Apparently satisfied, he sat down on the edge of the bed a few feet from Ford. “I didn’t expect you to be awake yet,” he said. “Did something happen?”

Ford blatantly ignored the question. “What time is it?”

“Nine-fifteen. It’s been six hours, kid – that’s not nearly enough sleep for the state you were in.”

Less than that, actually, considering that he’d been awake for a while, but still more consecutive hours of unconsciousness than he’d had in weeks. He’d take it. But— “Stanley, did you just call me ‘kid’?”

Stanley looked confused for a moment, then it seemed to hit him that he’d really done that. He leaned forward with his arms on his knees made a strange choking sound that might have been laughter.

Stanford watched it with some kind of emotion that he couldn’t name in the pit of his stomach. He was a grown man in his thirties – he shouldn’t be called ‘kid’ by his own twin. His own twin shouldn’t be of an appropriate age to call him ‘kid’. It was ridiculous, but it definitely wasn’t funny. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to reach out to his brother, but the cuff would have stopped him even if he did.

It seemed to take an effort of will for Stanley to calm down and straighten up. “I’m sorry,” he said finally, looking at the far wall. “Won’t do that again.” He turned back to Ford. “I don’t suppose I could convince you to try to get some more sleep?”

“No,” Ford said. He’d lost all will to sleep. Hopefully a few hours had done some good, at least. “I’d appreciate it if you undid the restraint.”

Stanley frowned, but nodded. “If that’s what you want,” he said, fishing out the key to the handcuffs from the pocket of his boxers and edged closer to Ford to get to his left wrist by the headboard. “But you’re still sleep-deprived, so don’t go disappearing anywhere on your own, okay?”

Before Ford could decide whether or not to reply to that, Stanley must have gotten a look at his wrist, because he gasped a curse and hastened to get the cuff off without another word.

Losing the restraint was like a terrible weight lifted off his shoulders. He had to resist the urge to get off the bed immediately just because he could. Instead he pulled his left arm up against his chest and watched his six fingers flex, feeling lightheaded.

“Shit,” Stanley was saying. “I’m so sorry, I should have realized—” He took hold of Ford’s arm again, looking at the bleeding, raw mark that encircled the wrist directly below the hand.

“Don’t!” Ford said reflexively, trying to pull away, but Stanley was stronger. The lightheadedness evaporated, replaced by a terrifying certainty that Stanley wasn’t going to let him get away—

“Easy, Poindexter,” Stanley said, letting go of his arm and raising both hands in a placating gesture. “You’re bleeding. I was just trying to take a look.” Ford realized he’d been tensing up like a bowstring, and his brother must have noticed. He wasn’t a prisoner. Stanley wasn’t with Bill, and he wasn’t like Bill.

Surely displaying a chafed wrist was less humiliating than wearing the cuff in the first place. “Look, then.”

This time Stanley barely touched him, but simply studied the wound with an increasingly steely frown. Ford hadn’t actually seen it properly himself before now, and he had to admit it looked ugly. He’d lost more skin than he’d expected.

“How could I be so stupid?” Stanley muttered. Then, louder, “Bill did this.”

Ford nodded silently.

“This is deliberate,” Stanley continued with an agitated gesture towards Ford’s wrist, as if the wound was an insult to him. “This isn’t just from tugging at it – he was doing this deliberately to hurt you.”

Ford huffed dryly. “That would be the assumption, yes.”

“And I didn’t even think of that possibility. Goddammit, Stan.” Stanley picked up the handcuffs and threw them at the nearest wall with a loud clatter. “Okay, this was a bad idea. Unless maybe we could wrap them in cotton or something... I don’t know.” He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Ford pulled his left arm inside the blanket, too, wincing slightly when several minor wounds rubbed against cloth and each other. He was not going to mention the rest.

“Did he manage to do anything else to you?” Stanley asked, as if reading his mind. “I didn’t hear anything, and when I checked around five you were sleeping like a baby, but—"

“I’m fine,” Ford said with as much conviction he could muster. It wasn’t a lot. “The important thing is that he didn’t get anywhere near the rift.”

Stanley sighed. “If you were fine you wouldn’t be awake after six hours in the first place.” He grimaced. “Are you cold?”

“I suppose I am,” Ford said. It wasn’t actually a lie. It wasn’t the main reason he was balled up in a blanket, but it was a decent one nevertheless.

“Do you have a fever? Can demons cause fevers?” Stanley touched Ford’s forehead with a couple of fingers. “I have no idea. I’ll get a thermometer with the bandages for your wrist.”

“Is all that necessary?”

“You bet it is.” Stanley looked at him intently. “And afterwards,” he said, “I know exactly what we’re gonna do.”

“Oh?”

“We’re gonna have breakfast.”

Stanford chortled in spite of himself.

“And then—" Stanley pointed a finger at Ford, “—we’re gonna find a way to get that demon out of your head. And that’s before we worry any more about the end of the world. That rift is gonna last longer than you will at this rate.”

He sounded so earnest about it. Ford let his head fall backwards and stared at the ceiling, biting back the explanation of how that was impossible. “Have you kept any of my clothes?” he asked instead. “I’d like to change.”

“Yeah,” Stanley said and pointed towards the other end of the room. “I washed up a bunch earlier – they’re in a basket over there.”

“Good.” Ford motioned to get up, still huddled in the blanket. “I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”

Stanley hesitated, and for a moment Ford was afraid he wouldn’t agree to that, that he wouldn’t give him the privacy to get dressed, but after a moment he nodded. “Don’t take too long. I’ll be waiting with some first aid and pancakes,” he promised before leaving.

 Stanford stared after his disappearing brother for a few moments before making an effort to collect himself. Dropping the blanket made him shiver, and he did not feel like looking at his body, but he could hardly ignore the cuts when moving at all made them protest painfully. He could feel barely-formed scabs reopening just from straightening his back. It was distracting, he could handle that.

Once he got to his feet he was also annoyed to note that the room was spinning around him, making him touch the wall for support until it passed. He’d slept; he should have been stronger.

His glasses were right on the temporarily isolated bedside table a couple of steps away, and being able to see – together with being mobile and unrestrained – did make him feel better, though. And while he might still be shaky, he did feel better than before. Slightly less clouded.

Bill could do what he liked to him; he still had enough strength to fight back.

Ford put Stanley’s laundry basket up on the bed and rummaged through it, moving stiffly as to not disturb the cuts too much. The clothes were a welcome bit of familiarity in the middle of a place that should have been familiar but wasn’t. Something in his house that was still his. They smelled clean, too. He’d almost forgotten what clean clothes smelled like.

He changed into clean pairs of boxers and pants, then shrugged his bloodied white shirt off. It was a lost cause anyway, so he bundled it up and used in a futile attempt to dab away some of the excess blood. It didn’t matter, he didn’t care about the blood – it was the markings as such that made him feel sick. What he needed was to get the whole mess out of sight. He picked a dark blue shirt and shrugged it on, actively ignoring a few drops of blood that leaked through while he buttoned it up. A soft brown sweater vest on top covered that – he patted himself down just to make sure. Even better – the basket contained his spare trench coat, and wrapping himself in that added yet another layer.

The journal went into the designated inside pocket of the clean coat, and the pen into his chest pocket. The blood-stained shirt and the rest of the dirty clothes went out of sight under the blanket, haphazardly thrown over the bed with its own stained side down. He put the laundry basket back on the floor and sat back on the edge of the bed, running a hand through his hair and sighing.

Stanley had promised pancakes.

[mysplaced-pen]

Day 3.1: Keeping the Spark

To my dear @namjoonthebabe . Who dragged me into three(3) kpop groups and counting, who is a great friend, who is hilarious and fun to talk to, who needs more sleep and good food, who is actually the first person I met in our friend group. You know I love you lots and lots. I hope you get better soon!! You’re doing great, babe.💛

Hope you like this!

[ Word Count: 1183 | Prompt: where what you write/doodle on your skin appears on your soulmate ]

A. N. : I know this is choppy, but I’m sick and I hope its cute :’) also, there’s a note at the end~

The familiar itching sensation snapped Yoosung’s attention away from paperwork. ‘We still on at 8 tonight?’ appeared on Yoosung’s hand. He reached for his pen, quickling scribbling a ‘yes’ to reply. It made him smile, though, thinking about it. The two of them haven’t had a date night in a few weeks now, part of him missed them. Not that their dates were extravagant or anything. In fact, the last time they went out and did something crazy was their first anniversary. They splurged on a indoor skydiving place, where Yoosung was half scared out of his mind, but they did have a lot of fun. Usually, their dates were either dinner - maybe a movie - or a picnic.

‘Great! See you after work babe<3’ Was Caleb’s response. It made Yoosung smile again, bringing his hand to his chest. One of his workers noticed and immediately started teasing him about it. “You do know phones are a thing, right? Text messages?” They said, laughing afterwards.

Yoosung rolled his eyes lightly before shrugging. “Yeah, but this is more fun. We could text each other, but this feels...more special.” And when he thought about it, it really was.

For some reason, this was still their preferred method of communication. It made things feel special. Some couples leave post-it notes to each other, some sneak notes in lunch boxes. They just happened to doodle things on each other’s skin all the time. It was their soul mark after all. Just because they found each other doesn’t mean they can’t continue to use it.

A lot of it was random, seemingly mundane things, but it made all the difference.

---

‘We need milk.’ Came onto Caleb’s skin, on the back of his hand. He shook his head. Really, Yoosung? Using the soul mark for that reason? Well...it did come in handy, but really? Caleb got out his pen and replied. ‘Yeah, I got you. Making some good dinner? Or are we going out?’

It felt weird. Especially thinking back to how they used this to found each other? How they found out they had this in the first place. And now they were all the way here. Using each other as grocery lists.

‘I’m making dinner~’ Yoosung’s reply came. And it still made Caleb smile. So I guess it worked out anyways.

---

‘Good luck today!’ Showed up on Caleb’s fingers - one letter on each finger. It surprised him - this never happened before. What on earth was this? And then, messy on his right palm, something else popped up. ‘Sorry that was weird, I just thought I would wish you luck..it seems like you were studying for something last night. You wrote a lot of formulas on your arms’ The writing was messy, but still readable, and he honestly found himself blushing. Who the heck was this? This had...never happened before.

Oh oh oh oh oh oh, it was that soulmate thing, wasn’t it?  One of his friends called it a ‘soulmark’. And that friend was snooping on him and slid over.

“Heyyy~ What’s that? Your soulmark?” She said, raising her eyebrows. Caleb shrugged her away from him, shaking his head.

“Whatever it is, it’s none of your business?” He said, tone heavy with sarcasm.

She grinned, clinging to his arm. “It is your soulmark! You got one of the cute ones! I just have this countdown clock.” She shook her head, but smiled at him again. “They’re wishing you luck? How cute~”

Caleb rolled his eyes, shaking his head again and facing away from her, but he smiled to himself. A soulmate, huh?

---

‘Be mine?’ Was written across Caleb’s nose when he looked in the mirror that morning. He burst out laughing at it.

The two of them were talked the night away last night, getting to know each other and trying to work out a time and place to meet up. They had been getting closer the past few days, and it was honestly just exciting. Though, at first, Caleb was hesitant. Not because he didn’t believe in soulmates, but just...you never know.

It felt real, though, and he was opening up more and more. He could tell Yoosung was too. They seemed to have a lot in common.

Thinking about meeting in person made both of them blush. Despite the distance and the fact that they never met before, it was going to go great. They both knew it.

‘Of course, dork. I’m already yours.’ Caleb wrote back to Yoosung, on his stomach. ---

Yoosung got off work that night at 6. He got home as early as he could just to set up. It was going to be a long night, anyways.

His plan was that they would start at home, a nice dinner. Something fancy, with candles and everything. Then they would go out and Yoosung would have a little scavenger hunt ready for Caleb. It would lead him to this picnic at their favorite spot for dessert. Then, they would end it back at the house to just relax and maybe play some LOLOL? Yoosung hadn’t played that in months.

...Kidding, he had a present. Nothing too fancy at all, but he felt like it would mean a lot. Or, at least he hoped it would.

---

After the scavenger hunt and picnic in the park, they were finally back home. Caleb went to go change into some more comfortable clothes while Yoosung went to get his gift.

When Caleb came out of the room, he expected to see Yoosung sitting on the couch, laptop ready and LOLOL already set up, but instead, he found Yoosung with a guitar.

“Yoosung?” Caleb started, but Yoosung shook his head and started playing.

“Noye Converse High~” He started.

“AbsOLUTELY NOT-” Caleb said, starting to turn away, but Yoosung just laughed.

“No no no, don’t go anywhere, I’m kidding!”

“You better be-”

Yoosung took a breath before closing his eyes and starting to play, singing as well.

**“amugeotdo saenggakhaji ma neon amu maldo kkeonaejido ma...geunyang naege useojwo nan ajikdo mitgijiga anha i modeun ge da kkumin geot gata sarajiryeo hajima”

Caleb was honestly shocked. He knew Yoosung could sing, but never thought that he would do so for him...and this song? ‘Butterfly’? Dang.

After the song, Yoosung smiled up at Caleb, who was wiping a tear. “Babe!” He said, putting down the guitar and running over to hug him. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Caleb said, hugging him back. “I just...wow. Thank you, babe, I can’t believe you did that.”

Yoosung smiled and kissed his nose. “Anything for you~”

The two of them stayed like that for a minute, hugging and just enjoying being with each other, before they went back to the couch.

“Wait.” Caleb said.

“What’s wrong?” Yoosung asked, turning around to face him.

“Was that why a butterfly was doodled on my arm? I thought it was just me.” They both laughed in response.

“I have to get better at hiding surprises, then.”

Caleb smiled, “No, I think it’s fine...I loved it.”

“And I love you.”

**Note: Here’s the Eng. Translation~ 

Don’t think of anything Don’t say anything, not even a word Just give me a smile I still can’t believe it All of this seems like a dream Don’t try to disappear

[solaciummeae]

Ship meme - Ivy x Vashti, Royce x Aaliyah.

TO: @notsobasicSUBJECT:  1. send me a ship and I’ll tell you… 2. send me a ship and i’ll tell you 3. send me a ship with a heart and i’ll tell you… 4. Send me a ship and I’ll tell you.. (KITCHEN/COOKING HABITS)  5. ♡ Send me a ship and I’ll tell you 6.send me a ship and i’ll tell you… 7. Ship Meme: BedroomMUN OR MUSE: Mun/MuseSTATUS: ACCEPTING { Established Ships ONLY! }

Okay so I’m giving you the “oh holy shit package” of ship memes are you ready?

{ IVY X VASHTI: }

1.who is more likely to hurt the other? I want to say neither, but Ivy usually gets hurt. I hope it doesn’t happen with them.who is emotionally stronger? Probably Vashtiwho is physically stronger? Ivywho is more likely to break a bone? Ivy who knows best what to say to upset the other? Vashtiwho is most likely to apologise first after an argument? Ivywho treats who’s wounds more often? Vashtiwho is in constant need of comfort? Ivywho gets more jealous? Ivywho’s most likely to walk out on the other? I don’t know Vash well enough to know if she would, but Ivy definitely wouldn’t walk out on her.who will propose? Ivywho has the most difficult parents? Probably Vashtiwho initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public? Ivywho comes up for the other all the time? Vashtiwho hogs the blankets? Vashtiwho gets more sad? Ivywho is better at cheering the other up? Vashti who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes? Vashtiwho is more streetwise? Ivywho is more wise? Vashtiwho’s the shyest? Bothwho boasts about the other more? Ivywho sits on who’s lap? Vashti

2. who hogs the duvet Vashtiwho texts/rings to check how their day is going Ivywho’s the most creative when it comes to gifts Vashtiwho gets up first in the morning Ivywho suggests new things in bed Ivywho cries at movies maybe Vashwho gives unprompted massages Ivywho fusses over the other when they’re sick Ivywho gets jealous easiest Ivywho has the most embarrassing taste in music neitherwho collects something unusual not surewho takes the longest to get ready Vashtiwho is the most tidy and organised Vashtiwho gets most excited about the holidays Vashtiwho is the big spoon/little spoon Ivy/Vashtiwho gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports Vashtiwho starts the most arguments Ivy

who suggests that they buy a pet Vashtiwhat couple traditions they have none yetwhat tv shows they watch together horror movies, zombie flicks, gay cinema, foreign filmswhat other couple they hang out with JudexEmma, AaliyahxRoyce, RyanxRaven, LoganxAlicia, AnthonyxGenevievehow they spend time together as a couple a lot of one on one time and staying in at this point.who made the first move I guess Ivy did.who brings flowers home Ivywho is the best cook Vashti

3.who is more affectionate in public? in private? Ivy. Vashti.who is the bigger romantic openly? secretly? Vashti. Ivy.who is more likely to plan something big for valentine’s day? Ivywho is more likely to initiate hand-holding in public? Ivywho is more likely to make huge declarations of love in front of other people? Ivywho developed a crush on the other first? Ivywho spends more time (possibly overthinking) what presents to get the other? Ivywho initiates most physical contact? Ivywho is more likely to send cutesy texts to the other? Vashtiwho spends time reading their zodiac compatibilities? Ivywho is more protective? Ivywho tends to get sick more often? Ivy 

who is better at taking care of the other? Vashtiwho said “i love you” first? or, if neither has said it yet, who is more likely to say it first? Ivywho believes in soulmates? both?

4.Who washes the dishes by hand and who uses the dishwasher? Vashti. Ivy.Who cuts vegetables, fruit, etc by hand and who uses the easy to use chopper? Vashti. Ivy.Who pours the cereal into the bowl first and who pours milk before the cereal? cereal first for both.Who buys/drinks bottle water and who uses/drinks from the tap? Vashti. Ivy.Who hoards disposable containers and who throws them away? Vashti. Ivy.Who buys milk in a paper carton and who buys it in a plastic jug? Plastic jug for both.Who picks paper bags and who picks plastic bags after grocery shopping? Always paper.Who HOARDS the plastic bags and who recycles them? Both recycle.Who hoards salt/pepper packs, togo silverware and other togo condiments? Ivy.Who lets the garbage can overflow before throwing it out? IvyWho gets annoyed when someone doesn’t use the clips for the potato chips? VashtiWho uses paper plates? IvyWho uses coasters? VashtiWho licks the spoon/butter knife after they use it? IvyWho loses the bread ties? IvyWho kicks the ice under the fridge when it falls on the ground? IvyWho constantly cuts/burns themselves when they cook? IvyWho organizes the spice rack?  VashtiWho uses the microwave more?  IvyWho stops the microwave one second before time’s up? Vashti

5.Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa IvyWho doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them VashtiWho starts the tickle fights IvyWho starts the pillow fights VashtiWho falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile IvyWho mistakes salt for sugar IvyWho lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning IvyWho comes up with cheesy pick up lines BothWho rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order VashtiWho licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies BothWho buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion IvyWho draws little tattoos on the other with a pen IvyWho comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation VashtiWho convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines Ivy

6.who believes in love at first sight? Ivywho started liking the other first? Unknownwho is more likely to suggest a romantic, candle-lit dinner? Ivywho’s behind the wheel more often during road trips? Ivywho sets up the tent and who gathers firewood during a camping trip? Ivywho hooks bait during a fishing trip? who catches more fish? Ivy. Vashti.who insists on learning how to ballroom dance? Vashtiwho goes all out on the other’s birthday? Ivywho sings louder while cooking? while showering? who teases the other for said singing? Ivy. Vashti. it’s mutual.who insists on checking their zodiac sign compatibility every so often? Ivywho drags the other to fortune tellers at fairs? Vashtiwho would carry who over the doorstep of a new home? Ivy carrying Vashti

7.Whose room was it first? IvyWhat size is the bed? QueenWhat color are the sheets? Wine RedHow many blankets do they use? TwoHow many pillows do they use? ThreeDo they sleep together or separately? TogetherDo they have a regular sleep schedule? Yes.Are they cuddlers, or do they keep to themselves? Cuddlers definitely.Who hogs the bed? VashtiWho snores? IvyDo they ever share the bed (with pets, children, etc?) Yes Is this their primary location for sex, or is somewhere else? No.Under the sheets, or on top of them? On topLights on, or lights off? BothIs the bed frame sturdy, or does it wobble with more vigorous activities? Wobbly for sure. Are the walls thin? No.How much time do they spend in the room? Not a lot.What other furniture do they have? bedside tables. armoire. dresser. lamps. chest. Do they have a system of organization for clothing and other items? Yes, Vashti’s doing.Do they keep the blinds open, or closed? Open. Is the room decorated at all? Yes, but again. Only because of Vashti. Ivy is more minimalist. Dark rich color. Dimly lit space. 

{ ROYCE X AALIYAH: }

1.who is more likely to hurt the other? Unknown.who is emotionally stronger? Royce.who is physically stronger? Royce.who is more likely to break a bone? Aaliyah. who knows best what to say to upset the other? Royce. who is most likely to apologise first after an argument? Aaliyah.who treats who’s wounds more often?  Aaliyah.who is in constant need of comfort? Neither.who gets more jealous? Aaliyah-- but I don’t know maybe Royce, we just don’t know.who’s most likely to walk out on the other? Royce? who will propose? Royce?who has the most difficult parents? Aaliyah.who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public? Royce. who comes up for the other all the time? Royce.who hogs the blankets? Aaliyah.who gets more sad? Aaliyah.who is better at cheering the other up? Royce. who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes? Aaliyah.who is more streetwise? Both.who is more wise? Both.who’s the shyest? Aaliyah, but only in the sense of their relationship.who boasts about the other more?  Aaliyahwho sits on who’s lap? Aaliyah.

2. who hogs the duvet Aaliyahwho texts/rings to check how their day is going Aaliyahwho’s the most creative when it comes to gifts Aaliyahwho gets up first in the morning  Royce

who suggests new things in bed Bothwho cries at movies Aaliyahwho gives unprompted massages Roycewho fusses over the other when they’re sick Aaliyahwho gets jealous easiest Aaliyahwho has the most embarrassing taste in music Aaliyahwho collects something unusual neitherwho takes the longest to get ready Aaliyahwho is the most tidy and organised bothwho gets most excited about the holidays Aaliyahwho is the big spoon/little spoon Royce/Aaliyahwho gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports Aaliyahwho starts the most arguments Aaliyah

who suggests that they buy a pet Aaliyahwhat couple traditions they have none yetwhat tv shows they watch together comedies, stand up, documentaries, disneywhat other couple they hang out with IvyxVashti, JudexEmma, CameronxCaroline, RyanxRaven, LoganxCici, AnthonyxGenevievehow they spend time together as a couple going out to V’s, clubs, dinner, movies, staying in, vacationing, they’ve always got plans of some kindwho made the first move Roycewho brings flowers home  Roycewho is the best cook Both

3.who is more affectionate in public? in private? Royce. Aaliyah.who is the bigger romantic openly? secretly? Aaliyah. Royce.who is more likely to plan something big for valentine’s day? Aaliyah.who is more likely to initiate hand-holding in public? Royce.who is more likely to make huge declarations of love in front of other people? Aaliyah.who developed a crush on the other first? Aaliyah.who spends more time (possibly overthinking) what presents to get the other? Aaliyahwho initiates most physical contact? Roycewho is more likely to send cutesy texts to the other? Aaliyahwho spends time reading their zodiac compatibilities? Aaliyahwho is more protective?  Bothwho tends to get sick more often? Aaliyah.

who is better at taking care of the other? Aaliyah.who said “i love you” first? or, if neither has said it yet, who is more likely to say it first? Aaliyah.who believes in soulmates? Aaliyah.

4.Who washes the dishes by hand and who uses the dishwasher? Aaliyah. Royce.Who cuts vegetables, fruit, etc by hand and who uses the easy to use chopper? Aaliyah. Royce.Who pours the cereal into the bowl first and who pours milk before the cereal? Cereal first for both.Who buys/drinks bottle water and who uses/drinks from the tap? Filtered for both.Who hoards disposable containers and who throws them away? They throw them away.Who buys milk in a paper carton and who buys it in a plastic jug? Plastic jug.Who picks paper bags and who picks plastic bags after grocery shopping? They use reusable bags.Who HOARDS the plastic bags and who recycles them? Recycle if ever.Who hoards salt/pepper packs, togo silverware and other togo condiments? They throw it out. Who lets the garbage can overflow before throwing it out? NeitherWho gets annoyed when someone doesn’t use the clips for the potato chips? AaliyahWho uses paper plates? NeitherWho uses coasters? BothWho licks the spoon/butter knife after they use it? BothWho loses the bread ties? RoyceWho kicks the ice under the fridge when it falls on the ground? AaliyahWho constantly cuts/burns themselves when they cook? AaliyahWho organizes the spice rack? BothWho uses the microwave more? neitherWho stops the microwave one second before time’s up? Aaliyah

5.Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa AaliyahWho doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them AaliyahWho starts the tickle fights RoyceWho starts the pillow fights Aaliyah

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile It depends on the night. Both.Who mistakes salt for sugar Aaliyah.Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning RoyceWho comes up with cheesy pick up lines BothWho rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order AaliyahWho licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies BothWho buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion AaliyahWho draws little tattoos on the other with a pen RoyceWho comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation  AaliyahWho convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines Aaliyah

6.who believes in love at first sight? Aaliyahwho started liking the other first? Roycewho is more likely to suggest a romantic, candle-lit dinner? Aaliyahwho’s behind the wheel more often during road trips? Bothwho sets up the tent and who gathers firewood during a camping trip? Aaliyah. Royce.who hooks bait during a fishing trip? who catches more fish? Royce. Aaliyah.who insists on learning how to ballroom dance? Aaliyah.who goes all out on the other’s birthday? Bothwho sings louder while cooking? while showering? who teases the other for said singing? Royce. Aaliyah. Neither. Both have good voices. Sometimes they sing together.who insists on checking their zodiac sign compatibility every so often? Aaliyah.who drags the other to fortune tellers at fairs? Aaliyahwho would carry who over the doorstep of a new home? Royce.

7.Whose room was it first? Neither.What size is the bed? King.What color are the sheets? Black pinstripe. How many blankets do they use? threeHow many pillows do they use? sixDo they sleep together or separately? together Do they have a regular sleep schedule? yesAre they cuddlers, or do they keep to themselves? both.Who hogs the bed? AaliyahWho snores? neitherDo they ever share the bed (with pets, children, etc?) Yes Is this their primary location for sex, or is somewhere else? YesUnder the sheets, or on top of them? UnderLights on, or lights off? BothIs the bed frame sturdy, or does it wobble with more vigorous activities? Sturdy. Are the walls thin? NoHow much time do they spend in the room? Usually just nights.What other furniture do they have? dress, nightstands, vanity, armoire, television, stereoDo they have a system of organization for clothing and other items? No. Sometimes they share clothing.Do they keep the blinds open, or closed? bothIs the room decorated at all? yes. everything is clean and classically elegant. there are rich colors and textures and the furniture is all high end. 

[lucifer-kane]

Long post with all those damn questions, For Luca! 

1. What is their gender?: transmasc but also ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

2. What is their sexuality?: bi

3. What is the meaning behind their name? Do they have any nicknames?: Not really a meaning to him, just he saw a name and was like ‘mine now’. Nicknames range from “Lu” to “Shit head” Depending who it is

4. Do they have any siblings? How many? Are they older or younger?  Which sibling are they the closest with?: One sister! She’s younger and they’re pretty close, the void kinda fucked that up but they reconnected 

5. What’s their relationship with their parents like? What about other relatives?: Very close with his parents, they’re not all that close with more distant family.

6. What would they give their life for?: Real talk? Fuck the void up so no one else can get hurt because of it 

7. Are they in a romantic relationship? With who? How did they meet?: Depending what verse, it’s Ron mainly, the Big Husband. Then the “Self Care” one is the big ot4 of him with Ron/Jack/Sammy and it’s real good stuff  But sticking with Ron, they met because Luca spent so much damn time at the lake after he got thrown out of the void because it was kind of a peaceful spot, he loves it there. 

8. What do they believe will happen to them after they die? Does this belief scare them?: He’s not super sure at this point, and it scares him just a bit 

9. What is their favorite color? Favorite animal?: Deep green, Ferret 

10. What are some of their talents/skills?: Art mostly, really good at fishing in all honesty. 

11. If they could make a mark on history, what would they like it to be?: Making King Falls not be Like That all the time, helping make it a more comfortable place to live for anyone. 

12. How old are they? When is their birthday?: 35/37 Feb 14th

13. What do they do for fun?: Draw, nap by the lake, read, rollerblade 

14. What is their favorite food? How often do they get to eat it?: Ron makes really good chicken fried steak and he will eat it as much as Ron will make it 

15. What was something their parents taught them?: Mom: Sewing Dad: Fishing

16. Are they religious?: Nah, more agnostic than anything else 

17. Where were they born?: Biiiiiig Pine 

18. What languages can they speak? Where did they learn these languages?: Mostly English, some Polish (moms side of the family)

19. What is their occupation?: Freelancer 

20. Do they have any titles? How did they earn them?: None 

Personality:

21. What is their favorite thing about their personality?: How nice he can be

22. What is their least favorite thing about their personality?: Silent anger

23. Do they get lonely easily?: Very much so

24. Do you know their MBTI type?: Not At All

25. What is their biggest flaw?: He’ll shut down if mad, will run off to do something without telling anyone first 

26. Are they aware of their flaws?: 100% 

27. What is their biggest strength?: The ability to admit he was wrong

28. Are they aware of their strengths?: Yes

29. How would they describe their own personality?: Timid, talkative when someone gets to know him, funny, kind

30. When frightened, will they resort to “fight” or “flight”?: Fight! Fight! Fight. Has punched Frickard more than once

31. Does this character ever put somebody else’s needs before their own? Who do they do this for? How often do they do this?: Absolutely, and constantly. First it was Ron for a couple reasons, but Jack is the biggest 

32. What is their self esteem like?: Eh? Could be better, but not the worse really

33. What is their biggest fear? How would they react to having to face it?: Going back into the void / he goes back in there to save his friend

34. How easily do they trust others with their secrets? With their lives?: Secrets: Depends how close they are. Life: They gotta be close as hell 

35. What is the easiest way to annoy them?: Ask them about the void really

36. What is their sense of humor like? Give an example of a joke they would find humorous.: Dark humor, uses it mostly as a front 

37. How easy is it for them to say “I love you”? Do they say it without meaning it?: Very easy! Never said without meaning 

38. What do others admire most about their personality?: Energetic, but will chill if others aren’t wanting to deal with it

39. What does their happily ever after look like?: A comfortable life, stability. 

40. Who do they trust most? Is that trust mutual?: Ron mostly, 100% mutual. 

Physical Profile:

41. What does their laugh sound like? Do they snort when they laugh? How often do they laugh?: So many snorts, it’s loud and happy, they laugh a lot more often now 

42. What is their favorite thing about their physical appearance?: Hair! Hair! Hair! 

43. What is their least favorite thing about their physical appearance?: Weirdly short torso?? idk really 

44. Do they have any scars? If so, what are the stories behind those scars?: A few, most from void weirdness

45. How would they describe their own appearance?: Not tall, not short, stocky

46. How easily can they express emotions? How easily can they hide emotions?: Expressing post void was a little hard, emotions for the first little while just showed without him wanting them to. Same with hiding

47.  What’s their pain tolerance like?: Pretty high really 

48. Do they have any tattoos? What are the stories behind those tattoos?: A few (not fleshed out) 

49. Do they have any piercings?: ears/belly button 

50. How would you describe their style of clothing? How would they describe their style of clothing?: Comfortable for both. 

51. What is their height? Weight?: 5′8 / ????

52. What is their body type? Are they muscular, chubby, skinny, etc?: chubby/broad shoulders 

53. What is their hair color? Eye color? Skin tone?: Hair: white/reddish brown Eyes: Hazel Skin tone: White/Tanned

54. What is their current hairstyle? What have been some of their past hairstyles? Which was their favorite hairstyle?: Shaved at the sides/long at the top, it’s been that way since basically forever 

55. What is their alcohol tolerance like? What kind of drunk are they? How bad are their hangovers?: Quite high, giggily drunk, not that bad really 

56. What do they smell like? Why do they smell like this? (Is it the things they’re around or a perfume they wear?): Pine-y? Like the earth and dirt but not in a bad way. 

57. How do they feel about sex? Are they a virgin?: It’s fun! He likes it. definitely not 

58. What is their most noticeable physical attribute?: Strong Arms

59. What does their resting face look like? Do they have RBF?: Tired more than anything

60. Describe the way they sleep.: Tosses and turns a lot, loves sleeping on his stomach if alone. If with someone(s), loves being cuddled up

Environment:

61. Which season is their favorite season?: Fall! 

62. Have they ever been betrayed? How did it affect their ability to trust others?: Eh, not really

63. What is always guaranteed to make them smile?: Friends, a good joke

64. Do they get cold easily? Do they get overheated easily?: Cold real easily, can almost never get warm

65. What’s their immune system like? Do they get sick often? How do they react to getting sick?: Shockingly good immune system, is grumpy when sick

66. Where do they live? Do they like it there?: King Falls is nice, he could like a warmer climate, but likes the size of the town

67. Is their bedroom messy? What about their bathroom? Kitchen? Living room?: He’s actually really neat, gets anxious if things are messy 

68. How did their environment growing up affect their personality?: I don’t think it really did??

69. How did the people in their environment growing up affect their personality?: Not as much as some would think

70. How do they feel about animals? Do they have any pets?: Loves animals! Has a dog! 

71. How are they with children? Do they have any? Do they want any?: Loves kids so much, will have 2

72.  Would they rather have stability or comfort?: Stability 

73. Do they prefer the indoors or outdoors?: Outdoors

74. What weather is their favorite? Do they like storms?: Warm but not too hot, not a fan of storms 

75. If given a blank piece of paper, a pencil, and nothing to do, what would happen?: So many doodles 

76. How organized are they?: SUPER organized, helped Ron get the bait shop more organized 

77. What is their most prized possession?: A lil art book from his grandfather 

78. Who do they consider to be their best friend?: Hard to say, he’s close with a few other sonas, loves them SO much, he can’t just pick one person 

79. What is their economic situation?: Could be better, but comfortable 

80. Are they a morning person or a night owl?: Night owl all the damn way

Miscellaneous:

81. Are they bothered by the sight of blood?: Nah, he was going to be a doctor 

82. What is their handwriting like?: Could be better 

83. Can they swim? How well? Do they like to swim?: Good swimmer! Not great, but good enough to swim in the lake

84. Which deadly sin do they represent best?: Envy (past) Wrath (current, more towards assholes in town) 

85. Do they believe in ghosts?: 100% (”Apparitions!”) 

86. How do they celebrate holidays? How do they celebrate birthdays?: Holidays are spent with friends and family, same with birthdays 

87. What is something they regret?: Leaving Jack even if it wasn’t in his control 

88. Do they have an accent?: Not really?? 

89. What is their D&D alignment? Neutral Good

90. Are they right or left handed?: Left! 

91. If they were a tweet, what tweet would they be?

92. Describe them as a John Mulaney gif.

93. What’s the most iconic line of dialogue they’ve ever said?: I.... really don’t think about this thing often alkjsfgrlkh “You know Harrison? The weird immortal bastard? I’m gonna go break into his house and steal some shit” 

Not really ~iconic~ but like Drunk Luca is just Time To Crime 

[exileoblivion]

all of them for you too buddy

alrighty, here goes!!1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? I try to make it equal, but I always end up with more milk than cereal

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? For the most part, yes. Unless I’m not feeling well or whatever

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Whatever’s close at hand that’s flat and small, lol

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? My coffee has to have a LOT of creamer and/or sugar. My tea depends; for the most part, it HAS to have at least a little bit of sugar, but there’s some that I don’t mind not having sugar in, just depends

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? YES.

6: do you keep plants? No

7: do you name your plants?No

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Either writing or drawing

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Yup!

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Mainly my sides, but I’ll lay on my back when I’m sick or hurt

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? …oh god…my one friend and I have one that deals with DMMD, and I am SO not talking about that here pppfffttttttt

12: what’s your favorite planet? I don’t really have one

13: what’s something that made you smile today? I WATCHED THE LEGO BATMAN MOVIE, AND IT WAS SO DAMN CUTE ALSDKFJELAKJSDF

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? Dorky AF. Probably a lot of purple/shades of purple for the colors

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! Space smells like burnt meat and metal, or something like that? I remember hearing that a while back

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Chicken alfredo, or Mushroom Ravioli alskdjfalskjdf

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? I REEEALLLLYYYYYY want to dye the right side of my hair pastel pink

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. that same inside joke about DMMD omfg alskdjf

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? a writing journal? No. I do have a TON of sketchbooks though, which have random doodles in them.

20: what’s your favorite eye color? Blue. BRIGHT blue. I’ve also lately REALLLYYYY been loving shades of brown that almost look red. 

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. I recently bought a Castiel bag from Hot Topic, and while it’s not old, it has gone on a few adventures through the woods with me, and went with me to my last job quite a lot. I’m going to be using it a TON when I get my fursuit partial in 2018.

22: are you a morning person? Depends on if I get enough sleep, and wake up in a good mood

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Laying in “bed” curled up in a few blankets with snacks and watch youtube vids

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? In the past, yeah. I haven’t had someone I could trust that much in a looonnnggggg time though

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? Technically it wasn’t breaking in to, but I went to explore my old abandoned house and it was SO cool, omfg. 

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? Lately it’s either my red converse or my gray winter boots

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? Man, I haven’t chewed gum in YEARS…I dunno?

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? i can’t think of an answer to this one

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? OF COURSE

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I love them in the winter! I love the ones with patterns, or things on them. The plain colored ones are so boring, tbh. I loooveeee the ones that go up to my knees, or the super fuzzy ones. I also super love slippers asldkfj 

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. I can’t stop thinking about that damn DMMD joke between my one friend and I alskdjfalkds that happened WELL after 3am when we were both super tired to the point of delirium, and it’s just so funny alskjf

33: what’s your fave pastry? It’s a tie between pie and cinnamon buns/rolls

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? I had this plush cat that my one grandma gave me for christmas like…a year or so before she died? I named her Jellybean, and I took her EVERYWHERE with me. I should still have her…at least I did when we moved here when I was like 15…but I haven’t checked…she could be ruined for all I know ughhhhhhh

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yeah! I use stuff like that on rare occasions.

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? STARSET!!!!!

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? I don’t have a room, and have way too much stuff in all different areas to keep anything organized. I HATE it :”D

38: tell us about your pet peeves! I CAN NOT FUCKING STAND THE SOUNDS OF PEOPLE EATING. IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT IT IS, I CAN ALWAYS HEAR PEOPLE EATING. I HATE IT. I HATE IT. I FUCKING HATE IT ALSKDJFALSKDJFLAKSJDFUUGHHHHHHHHHHHH. No, but seriously. I can NOT be around people that are eating. I HAVE to have headphones in. Like, no offense…I have sensitive hearing, and chewing ((honestly, any kind of mouth noise other than talking)) noises make me gag and spiral into a HUGE anxiety attack and it’s so bad alsdkjfalskdjf 

39: what color do you wear the most? Black

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? Okay, so since I keep mentioning DMMD; I got an Industrial piercing in my left ear just like Noiz. It was the last piercing I got, and my first one from a PROPER piercer. The whole experience was awesome, and I loved it. It was back when our group was still 4 people, and we made a day of it. The piercer was SUPER nice, talked me through everything he was doing, being calm and reassuring, and just super sweet in general? Afterwards, he gave me a box of apple juice to help with my blood sugar, and I loved that idea so much, that to this day after I get tattoos or piercings, I always make sure to have apple juice as a tradition. I got my last piercing because 1.) I thought it looked HELLA cool, 2.) I reallllyyyyyy wanna cosplay Noiz, and 3.) Noiz’s character has a TON of meaning and stuff with me. Up next I’m gonna start stretching my lobes like him. Maybe it’ll be soon! 

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? Another Note: The Los Angeles BB Murder cases

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! Sadly, no. If I did, it’d probably be a Starbucks or a Crazy Mocha

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? Like, actually laid out with a blanket and watched them for a long period of time? When I was a little kid with my brothers, watching a meteor shower

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? n-e-v-e-r~

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? sometimes

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of  for the life of me, I can’t think of any at the moment alskdjfalskdjfleakjsef

.47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? BLACK LICORICE

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? I think it may have been the dark…? And I mean…I do suffer from sleep paralysis…so…sometimes, kinda…..bllleeecchhhhhh

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? YES! The last two that I bought myself was  Gorillaz’s Demon Days and Plastic Beach 

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Do stuffed plushes/animals count…? Cuz…ya boi has a bad addiction with buying stuffed things

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? The only ones that I can think of are all sad/depressing/triggering…

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? What in tarnation dog…I don’t get the whole babadook being a gay icon one, but it is funny af for some reason??? distracted boyfriend….is the “BITCH I WON’T HESITATE’ considered a meme at this point, cuz I LOVE that one even if it isn’t

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I will NEVER watch or listen to that shit, get it out of here. Not yet, but maybe someday. HATE IT. Never seen it.

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? IRL…? no clue lmao

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? God…I have no clue….probably like, raise my voice…?

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? …I really need to start paying attention to people more…I can’t think of anything…

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? Unpopular opinion…I hate that song. 

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? I don’t have enough friends to apply this to anyone oops

59: what’s your favorite myth? I don’t have a favorite myth, but can we talk about conspiracy theories and stuff like that???? cuz, holy hell…my eyes are finally open to them and some of them are GLORIOUS

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? Poetry’s okay, I don’t have any faves

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? Probably like everything I ever give people. I can’t think of any

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? If I have apple juice, I WILL DRINK THAT EVERY MORNING ALSKFJLSKEJF

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? I kinda just leave them be. As long as they don’t get ruined

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? It looks black?

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? convention friends. I also used to have a lot of online friends who have all pretty much disappeared that I miss terribly…

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? It’d be made of golden flowers. because reasons.

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? ALIVE alskdfjaslkdfj

68: what’s winter like where you live? It’s all over the freaking place. Sometimes it’s super cold, snowy, windy….other time’s it’s kinda cold, no snow, we’ve had a few where it’s practically spring weather?!???!?!?! 

69: what are your favorite board games? I love CAH, and other kinds of adult humored games like those alskdfj

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Not an Ouija board, but I have used a pendulum thingy with a sheet of paper that almost represented an Ouija board

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? I love ALL kinds of tea. I have so many faves, I can’t pick just one alskdjfalskdfj

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? Sorta, yeah

73: what are some of your worst habits? Whew boy, just about everything I do anymore is bad lmao

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. um…they’re…human?

75: tell us about your pets! I don’t have any

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? sleeping lmao

77: pink or yellow lemonade? yellow

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? HATECLUB

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? no one’s done anything cute for me in years thx

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? The area that I sleep in has white walls. It’s the color that was here when we moved in.

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. …it just occurred to me…that I have no idea what color eyes my friends have…WELP

82: are/were you good in school? Nope lmao

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? I think the art for Plastic Beach is pretty neat

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? YES!!!! I have my Bill Cipher one all drawn up, just need to get it done. And then, I’m thinking of getting the seal of Metatron from the SH series done on my other rib, and then….I have SOOOOOOoooooOOoOOOoOoO many more ideas for tattoos, it’s ridiculous, lmao.

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? I don’t read comics, but I do read manga lol. I LOVE Deadman Wonderland, I just got the complete series of MARS which was the first manga series I ever read through, Alice 19th is SO GOOD, of course my unhealthy love for Killing Stalking, Blood Bank…um…I can’t think of anymore atm

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? I honestly don’t know what that means….? But, it’s possible…?

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Nightmare Before Christmas, Inception, Shutter, the original Halloween movies, Guardians of the Galaxy, The Lost Boys, Queen of the Damned, Ironman 3

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? Not really

89: are you close to your parents? nope

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. Okay, so…I’ve only ever been to D.C. once so far, but it’s REALLY beautiful alskdfj I can’t wait for next Otakon, and hopefully be able to explore it more. There’s such a surreal charm to it. You can reallllllyyyyy feel the history everywhere you go there. Just. Damn. 

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? I WANT TO VISIT CENTRALIA SO GOD DAMN BADLY WHILE I’M STILL THE SAME AGE AS JAMES SUNDERLAND, AND I’M RUNNING OUT OF TIMEASLDKJFALSKEJFLAKSJFLKJ

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? no cheese plz

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? messy buns or ponytails

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?…one of my brothers…???

95: what are your plans for this weekend? celebrate Thanksgiving, make a dessert for our dartball tournament…hope to hell I don’t get dragged to it…and hopefully write or play games. Maybe also clean too….

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? I tend to let them go for awhile before updating

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INFP, Aquarius, Slytherin

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? too long!!! and, I think so?

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Hiro no Tsuki/Melfina’s song, Is there Somewhere and Control by Halsey, just about the whole Undertale soundtrack, the sountracks to both Portal 1, and 2, ESPECIALLY Exile Vilify by The National, All of Me by John Legend,JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING BY STARSET, I know there’s a ton….but those are all of the ones I can think of at the moment

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the future. 5 years ago was TERRIBLE, and I never want to relive it again.