#i dont want to fucking talk to dazai osamu right now

[verpaine]

fuck i want to TALK TO HIM. please, chuuya find me. i cannot bring myself to talk to you first. maybe its fear i wont live up to your expectations or be the brother you deserve. all of us in our system know what you're doing, its what dazai did, and it worked. i want to talk with you so badly, don't give up on me. i just cant talk to you, maybe im ashamed, i wish i could tell you. surely you'll find me. it's unbearable, like this, i just need to hug you again chuu. please.

[tittysuckersworld]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEAAAASE!!!!! tell me about your huhhhhh fem skk au .... actor dazai.. band chuuya. idk where the post went i think it was you, i beg, on my hands and knees i love them. plzplzplz (agree with ur tags btw me2:(( )

I AMMM THE PERSON WITH AUU THANK YOU FOR ENABLING MEEEEEE- ehem hi hallo i am yes hi sudhsudjs okay ya uhhhhh hm im not sure where to start from where left off- rant got long so under cut is more :>

but pretty much soukoku as an idol group til the photographer/aspireing writer oda somehow gets in a scandle and has his parental rights to his kids taken away. before was shared custody but now is.. not.

at this point dazai was already very ready to quit being an idol. so to try and cover up the oda scandal she leaks some pictures of her kissing some people earlier in her career and some mysterious ginger lady....... she also sets up a bomb under one of the agencys cars to really blow everything over.

chuuya is not happy with this. very not happy with this.

but, now she has the freedom to do whatever she wants with her music. so she gose full pop-punk rock<3<3<3<3 and also this is where stupid animatic make their way into my plan. remember the song black sheep cover by lady in schot pilgram, this is one song chuuya makes when she hits it off on her own. she also gets really popular when she moves to pop punk rock

okay dont actually have much else planned with this- just that 2-3 years later dazai publishes a book and its a crazy best seller. talking about the inner workings of the industry and is working on her next books. mabey publishes another in like a year. i am not fully sure timeline-

the dazai leaving the agensy and car bomb really give off breaking up vibes to chuuya til a hose soaked dazai is in front of her door. not even fake rain just blondie(kunikida) got mad at her plan and desided to try soaking the prick. i dont think they immediately start dating again, but they do at some point. and is secret dating ya.

dazai just shows up to some of chuuyas shows? its a running gag that dazai will somehow get on stage and fuck with chuuya. or mess with the lights. or just anything to make a lil ruckus. the media has no clue how dazai keeps ending up at them at the right place and right time.

so! one time 4-5-6 years after dazai leaves the company and a few years of them dating again, dazai sorta.. stops coming to the shows for a little? like seems to be super busy with new book or smth.

animatic timee

then on anniversary chuuya desides to sing one of her old songs. and dazai is sitting in the croud. and is so so much. at the end the light moves over to dazai in the croud as she walks tword the stage. then the lights shut off when shes on the stage. just those two, heres their dialog have thought up, will be little janky not best but im trying. pls change if want.

Ch: "oh so right here-"

D: "Chuuya Nakahara. that first day i met you. that was begrudgingly one of the best days of my life. you were one of the best things in my life. you are one of the best things in my sorry life."

*the sprinklers to the concert all go off*

Ch: "DAZAI?!!?!"

D:"Remember that first arcade date? it was raining so hard we got instantly soaked. got sick for a week with our managers yelling at us. i hated it, but i hated it with you."

D:"or how we snuck out durring that one stop in paris? i was able to get that shitty corner store wine and a day old baguette and you smiled so wide. it was like the sun opened up in front of me."

D:"Mabey instead you could think of that one time, after that accident at that one fan meet. where you slowly unwound and rewound my bandages. kissing each little thing. had to drag you off before you tryed kissing every molecule of my arms."

Ch, wispering: "Osamu.."

D:"Chuuya Nakahara. i am sick of telling lies to the world. im sick of hiding how my eyes can light up hearing your snorts. im sick of hiding the butterflys in my stomach whenever we brush hands on the sidewalk. im sick of not being able to say and shout to the world im yours. so today, no more hiding."

by this point any audience people that stayed are using the flash on their cameras to take pictures, and dazai had bent down to one knee.

D:"Insted, how about we be Chuuya Nakahara-Dazai and Osamu Dazai-Nakahara? from today to death do us part, will you marry me?"

and yada yada ruegfuejhrbe okay yup not sure thats any good- half tempted to have chuuya take the knee here but i think she dose her own cute more private proposal for her engagement back. but yee thats all i got planned!! thank you so much for enabling me and pls pls pls if wanna talk more about this me dms are so so so so open and so is my ask box please begging

[ashthemadwriter-archived]

Hello!

May I request Chuuya and Dazai x fem!reader (separately, ofc) where the reader has suicidal thoughts due to severe depression? It's okay if you find it uncomfortable, I understand!

Have a good day/night!

Fandom:Bungou Stray Dogs

Pairings: Chuuya,Dazai X fem!reader

Genre:Fluff,Comedy

Format:Head Canon

Warnings:None

A/n: it is hard honestly,but let me worry about that :D

tysm love :)))

@miss-akutagawa

Osamu Dazai

well hes the same as you so he understands what it feels like

hes just good at hiding it,unlike you

but he doesnt really know how to help you get through it.cause...he never tried himself

hes like:

so,wanna commit suicide together?

hes not comfortable while asking you though,cause this time its possible for you to say yes,and that has never happened to him

he regrets it when he sees that you are actually considering it

he'll try to talk to you about it.he knows that talking about it kinda hurts,but it does feel good afterwards(if youre talking to the right guy

he will comfort you.its even possible that he tells you about his own story,if hes comfortable enough around you

i think he will feel better himself after the conversation :)

Dazai is so sad,honestly...i feel really bad for him

now im crying too lol

ahm...so,where were we?

just imagine him comming to you inthe middle of the conversation,hugging you from behind while comforting you

he'll plant small kisses on your forehead to distract you,and he kinda succeded

when hes alone he'll realise something that will made him smile softly...

all this time he was looking for someone to commit suicide with him,andnow that he has found the perfect girl...he doesnt wanna do it.he wants to live.he wants to see her smile happily.he wants to see her face when he wakes up in the morning.he wants to hug her tightly on rainy days,while smelling the coconutt scent thats comming from her hair

bruh i got so emotional LMAO

yeah...so dont worry.with this guy taking care of you,you'll definitely recover soon :D

Chuuya Nakahara

this ones kinda hard,cause the same crap goes for him too ecxept for the suicidal part lol

ok

so...he comes back home from a long mission,and finds you broken like that,surrounded by your thoughts

hes terrified.he finally found someone who will never betray him,and now hes gonna lose her in another way

is he gonna let that happen?is he gonna let you say goodbye to him that easily?

hell fucking no

he is terrified,but he wont show you that.instead,he comes in your bedroom,sits on your bed while asking you what is wrong with a serious face

"hey y/n! snap out of it! what is going on with you?"

thats when you just start crying.like a bumb which was about to explode,you were just waiting for something or someone to upset you,and then you found it

Chuuyas reaction is kinda funny lol.hes shocked and worried

"im sorry i didnt mean to upset you!hey stop crying!"

after hugging you a bit,you'll eventually calm down.you'll start talking to each other,and that will make you calm down a lot

Chuuya is sad now too

"my poor darling...what have you been through while i was gone?"

he'll definitely make you go talk to a therapist (unlike Dazai,he doesnt believe in them)

with an expert checking up on you and having Chuuya by your side,you'll be ok again not long after that :)

really hope youre ok KitKat,feel free to send me messages whenever youre feeling down

i got you :)

-Ash

[alcoholandcakes]

𝓢/𝓸 𝔀𝓱𝓸’𝓼 𝓪 𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓬𝓲𝓼𝓽

<Dazai Osamu, Chuuya Nakahara, Atsushi Nakajima, Akutagawa Ryunnosuke, Yosano Akiko>

Dazai Osamu

- you have a lot of medicine at home

- please lock it away from him so he won’t try another attempt

- you only keep those ones around that he cannot overdose on

- “ HOW CRUEL OF YOU BELLADONNA? YOU DONT EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE NOW DO YOU?”

- “ osamu I do love you but I won’t give you pills on which you can overdose- get that out of your mind right in this instant!”

- you can be pretty strict with him

- but it’s because you’re worried for him

- when he’s sick you always make sure that if you give him medication he doesn’t drink it down with alcohol

- he likes whiskey a little too much

- all in all he is fascinated by the fact that you know every medication, their side effects and what they’re for

- and he likes how you don’t allow him to just take it without your presence but he wouldn’t admit it

- it shows Him you care

- plus you bring him free bandages so it’s a win-win situation for him

Chuuya Nakahara

- you don’t need to worry about him trying to overdose with the pills you keep at home

- but you need to worry about him trying to drink it down with FUCKING WINE

- you always need to remind him to not drink wine

- one time he was a bit irritated and reminded him he started yelling

- “ DO YOU THINK IM THAT DUMB TO NOT KNOW THAT I SHOULDNT DRINK WINE WHEN TAKING IT?!”

- you just stayed calm looking at him with doe eyes and he apologized right away

- there wouldn’t be way too many arguments about it but he would get mad once in a while

- once he got sick and you were at work he tried to find himself some pills but there were so many he literally got lost 😭

- he needed to call you for assistance

- you assisted him as much as you could

- he loves how you can tell him right away what medication is for what

Atsushi Nakajima

- he doesn’t get what medication is for what so he keeps his distance

- you don’t need to worry about him really

- when he’s sick you stay at home with him because he won’t take pills

- he would rather suffer

- you usually give him only painkillers nothing more or herbal tea

- that helps him, he has a strong immunity

- you would even teach him what is for what

- he gladly learns because you’re passionate about it

- he loves to learn about it really

- so he knows the primary ones like frontin, Xanax, ibalgin

Akutagawa Ryunnosuke

- he’s pretty sick

- he has problems with his lungs so yeah

- you actually met him when he went to buy some medicine

- once when he came again you gave him your number on the bill with the text “call me up if ya wanna”

- well he called you out to go on a tea with him

- so you went out and got to know each other better but you mostly talked about pills and what he should take instead if he had bad side effects

- you started calling him after work and brought him his medication without him needing to pay

- first he looked weirdly at you and thought you wanted something from him

- he hardly realized that it was only your kindness

- you did this pretty often because you felt like he needed it

- after you got together with him and move in with him you made sure to always have at home what he needs

- when his condition gets worse you always stay home with him even when he’s so stubborn wanting to go to work

- but you force him to stay at home so he gets atleast a bit better

- he really loves you for it but doesn’t wanna show it

- you always take such a good care of him and now gin doesn’t need to worry so much because he’s in good hands

Yosano Akiko

- when she was getting a re-fill she met you

- she really liked you (love at first sight)

- she gave you her number right away that day

- you called her at the end of your shift and things just happened

- now she doesn’t even need to come to the pharmacy

- she just calls you and at the end of her shift you bring her the medication she needs

- she just loves the fact that your interest kinda match

- you can talk about work and you’ll understand each other

- you guys take care of each other

- when she has time she will bring you lunch to work

A/n: so rn I’m having ideas so yeah<3

I hope you guys stay well hydrated and safe I luv you guys so much <33

28.08.2022- Cali

[yatsugareboyf]

How would dazai and chuuya deal with jealousy?

I LOVE JEALOUSY LETS FUCKING GO

jealousy with dazai & chuuya.

dazai osamu

i think he's more "playfully" jealous more than anything, really

like when kunikida talks to you abt some mission he whines from behind "kunikida-kun, dont take my belladonna away from me"

or when atsushi gets paired up with you hes throwing a tantrum "atSUSHI-KUNN, WHY WOULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS"

but he isnt JEALOUS jealous

he rarely ever gets jealous, but he does get protective...

like when someone flirts w you and you're openly uncomfortable he'll step in and shoo the mf away

he'll always be close to you in some way so it's known that you're taken

when he does get jealous i dont think he'll show it that much?

like YOU'LL DEFINITELY FEEL IT AT HOME.... IF U KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABT...

but really all he'll do is hold your hand and smile bitterly at whatever's making him jealous

of course, you reassure him that you only have time for him, which really really feeds his ego

"ah, my belladonna is so famous with other people but only chooses to be with me? i feel blessed"

"i literally just talked to a barista"

he doesn't feel insecure bcs he knows you love him a lot

lots of neck kisses when u get home

ofc if u like it then u gonna put a ring mark on it right

nakahara chuuya

now he is openly jealous.

gets really angry and irritated

hes like AGHRHRHRKSKDKKDKD NO THEY'RE MINE LEAVE US ALONE kind of jealousy

he doesn't get easily jealous tho, he just gets really really insecure and possessive

cant have u leaving like that like your his

he trusts anyone inside the port mafia with you, so he doesn't worry about that

but people blatantly flirting with you ? that u barely even know? yeah no hes going feral

"y/n, can you come here? let's go somewhere else, yeah?"

or

"back off, don't you see they're taken? they clearly look uncomfortable. leave us alone."

orrrr

"baby, lets go home. clearly some people can't mind their own fucking business"

while maybe holding your waist or having you wrap your arm around his, a clear public display that you're already taken

i feel like he wont be.... aggressive with you when he gets jealous

he just wants some reassurance and words of confirmation that u wont leave him 🥺

like love on him more and he'll be so happy

u dont even have to give so many things ot affection just reassure him and spend more time with him and just show him that hes yours only

AHDJKEKRNKSLAKSJKSKSN I LOVE HIM

[tender-rosiey]

No matter how much I say it ur writing is always a bless to make my day happy🥺💕

Atsushi/Chuuya/Dazai dealing with their lovely pregnant wives😊❤

❥ Dazai and Atsushi dealing with their pregnant s/o

❥— Chuuya’s part: ❤︎

ᴀ/ɴ: I am so happy you liked it and I hope you enjoy this one as well! Chuuya already has one tho and I linked it above 💘

Dazai Osamu:

LETS FUCKING GO

man has two lives depending on him now 😙

YOU WILL BE ABSOLUTELY PAMPERED

“Belladonna, do you need anything?”

“Would you like me to do something for you?”

“Do you want me to get it to you so you don’t have to stand?”

ITS NOT EVEN TEASING

that’s for another time ;)

He is gonna be so nervous during the pregnancy but will try his best

He will try and do things that will keep your mood light and happy

If lord doesn’t want him to be spared then

Despite his efforts he will get twice the trouble the demon you were on your period

“I AM SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME”

“Belladonna let’s talk this out o-okay?”

Osamu honey, a couch won’t stop the knife she is gonna throw

Now to the teasing

He doesn’t get near the teasing of your weight tho

He knows that you may be troubled by it so instead he keeps complimenting how you look

“You look so pretty with our baby inside of you 🥺”

what he actually teases you about is how you might walk funny then he relate it to ‘something’ else

“That walk reminds me of that time after we-“

He has been hit by a chair

K.O.

He always smiles when he lays his eyes on your baby bump

You could be just standing there and Dazai would just look to it and smile softly

HE CANT WAIT FOR THE BABY TO BE IN HIS ARMS

I genuinely think Dazai would need reassurance from you that he will be a good father

He is like scared that he might be unable to raise someone well and that the baby will be like he was or what he is trying to hide in a sense

So please tell him that he will be alright and that you will by his side guiding him through it all

Now you know how chuuya doesn’t let you leave the house, right?

Dazai is the opposite

The reason is that he doesn’t want you to leave his sight so he can be able to help you in case something happens

“I can still do stuff Osamu, I am not a baby-“

“You HAVE a baby in you so technically you are baby.”

Aw

He likes telling jokes to the baby bump 🥺

Gets so excited when the baby kicks

One day he was just caressing it when he was telling a story about how he pissed off Kunikida

When it came to the funny part, the baby kicked and Dazai got so happy and sparkly eyed

“HE LIKES MY STORIES; BELLADONNA HE LIKES MY STORIES!”

Well at least you know prior to its awakening

That you will have a another mischievous little shit

A cute one tho <3

Atsushi Nakajima:

How dare he be so adorable

And of course he is an aged up bean

Also Wan watchers how are you all feeling about the ending of the episode of the fireworks 😃

Okay now let’s get to business

He would be so cautious about everything

Even more cautious than you

And you are the pregnant one here

“NO Y/N DONT MOVE”

“NO I WILL COOK”

“PLEASE JUST STAY IN ONE PLACE; I DONT WANT YOU OR THE BABY TO GET HURT”

Atsushi baby they aren’t made of glass

Another one that would pamper you like a queen

At least with what he can manage

but as we all know Kunikida has a wallet for a reason <3

Low key making him a bank right now

I genuinely love Kunikida tho

Anyways

So atsushi will search videos on what to do so he can make your preganancy easier on you

Most of the time he will just keep complimenting you so you don’t get in a bad mood

And probably use his puppy dog face cause he finally knew it’s your weak point

But yeah he still gets thrown with chairs

“Angel did you-AHHHHHHHHHH”

He just wanted to tell you a pick up line Dazai told him ;(

Atsushi LOVES and I mean LOVES talking to your baby bump

“How’s daddy’s baby doing?”

Talks to it when he had a bad day and just complains to it

“Dazai-san ate more poisonous mushrooms and tied me to the ceiling today 😔”

Or when he had a good day :D

“I kicked akutagawa’s face accidentally today when I saw him shopping; that was the accomplishment of my life.”

“And you are alive?”

“Exactly,”

Don’t interrupt their conversation or Atsushi will pout and go ‘our dumpling was gonna talk, angel :(‘

He kisses it too 🥺

Then kisses you and proceeds to thank you for having his baby

And for being with him <3

The first time he felt the baby kick he was so excited and happy

You know the gif of him up there?

Yeah that reaction

I think he will buy the baby so much clothes :0

He imagines cute scenarios that can happen with the baby when it comes

“Y/N, what if for example the baby’s first word are papa? 🥺”

copyright © 2020 tender-rosiey

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

[daughterofsinsloth]

I heard from a friend of mine that you are suggesting great fics of soukoku! Everyday I always go to AO3 and look for Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya tags to find interesting stories but recently I dont feel anymore of enthusiastic when I see updates, probably just stress from school. If its okay do you have any skk amazing fics that you like to recommend me or some you read?

hello anon-chan!! and hello to your friend too!than k you very much for your words! they makle m e really happy!

now! I kinda understand what you mean. maybe coz lately there are more angst fics? also school can be a major reason! i freak out a lot too! neh I will give you some fluuf and romantic  or action fics so you can realx and forget all about school okay?

lets see!

first some great writers, that you will definatly enjoy, are:

ReaperStygian 

setosdarkness

photography_tea

Memos

Witheryvine

Avi_pizzapopolis

AnonLearnsToWrite

Konoha79

sodenoshirayuki_23

izanyas

stargazerlilith

SoukokuParadise

hellosweetie17

gureshintrash

TheGreatCatsby

hybridempress

Lake_Toya

Kohaku69

okay now some am amazing fics that my heart always skip a beat reading them!

Mother by WhisperingWinds99:

a really heart warming fic! Kouyou narrate skk life and we see her mother sight! well written and overwelming emotions . one shot

Movie Nights and Lazy Mornings by evie_maria:

a cute little one shot abouot skk weekend! pure fluff and calm feelings.

Seven days to show you my love by holdinglucy:

It takes Dazai seven days to prove Chuuya he’s still his partner in the things that matter. one shot and absolutely lovely! Im jealous of chuuya here! its nice seeing Dazai as a caring boyfriend who tries to find happiness and Chuuya deserve some too.

Chuuya’s Secret by Anonymous:

Chuuya’s behavior has become strange lately, but Dazai, with his insight, is certain he can figure it out. a hilarrious fic! one shot and a fluffy one! its mpreg too and its funny seeing Dazai as these dork dads!

Fire in the Night by ChubbyHippo:

I love this one. its one shot and AU. brothel!Chuuya and solder!Dazai fell in love under the bright moon and my hearet stopped!its lovely, romantic,bit sad but overwelm ing and leaves you full.

Five more minutes by counter_illumination:

from morning to night their typical day. cute and fluffy.crak makes an apperance too coz we are talking about Dazai.a really nice feeling in it. one shot

Shared Gravity by writingfromtheshadows, ZODIACHUUYA:

mind the writes too. multi-chptrs. the writers take turns with the chptrs leaving no hoe init and giving you the emotions open to see. AU!high school and reallyyyyy good.The first time they slept together, Dazai and Chuuya were little more than academic rivals thrown together in a haze of dancing and alcohol.Every time after that, well, they just seemed to be drawn to each other. its an awesome fic

A Hearts Desire by Kaokita :

AU and multi-chptrs.Chuuya works in a brothel when he meets Dazai, a journalist. Dazai thinks he can save Chuuya but Chuuya doesn’t need saving. The one who needs saving is the one who longs for a reason to keep living. Chuuya and Dazai end up saving each other. this two are like magnets and when they connect they are explode. Chuuya thinks that they are different but they are not really. A+++ for Oda being alive.

Feel My Love by eunrihae:

multi-chptrs, one going, mpreg.they are just in  love and noone thoought that Dazai was serious about Chuuya. but boy they are wrong. coz in the end of the day they will always be in love.

Five Times Dazai Didn’t Stay, and One Time He Did. by kidspawn02:

I honestly loe this one. its well written, well built and over welming. emotions bear for you to see and feel . it has smut b ut not graphic but its about Dazai and Chuuya don’t really know how to deal with sexual tension, and Chuuya doesn’t think it’s fair that he’s fallen in love and that Dazai leaves every time they share a bed. it hurts but the ending is perfect. one shot

Strangers and Painkillers by TheEnigmaticPhoenix:

thiiiiiiiis fic!!!!! best absolute perfect! fluff and light angst but its great! Chuuya has no right as a stranger to make assumptions that the man sitting in front of him is hurting more than he is, despite the huge bloody gash running down the length of Chuuya’s arm.So, in an attempt to become less of a stranger, Chuuya lets the man drag him to the hospital to get his arm treated, hoping that he’ll answer Chuuya’s questions.What Chuuya doesn’t realize is that it’s not that easy to get a certain Dazai Osamu to open up. (part of series)

(i believe) i think i said goodbye to my soul tonight by iskendaris:

this one has smut but I choose it for what it represent. the raw emotions and the writting just bring to light words and promises long buried and very much needed by afraid to be said. true emotions that no one wanted to say but they are not bad and its great how the writer portain them. Dazai OP is “This isn’t sex as much as its an interrogation. Whatever Chuuya wants from him, he doesn’t know why but he knows he can trust Chuuya not to fuck him up.Or rather, he knows why, but he doesn’t think about it too much about baseless trust issues, because therein lies hell and damnation.” and its nice seeing through him

Temporarily by prettypurplegirl08:

cutness overload and a very much needed happiness.multi-chptrs and you dont want it to end.In Dazai’s arms was a small child–Chuuya would guess he was probably around 3 or 4 years old–with, surprisingly, silver white hair staring at Chuuya with those wide purple-yellow mixture orbs of his. The little kid was only wearing an over-size white shirt–well it’s definitely oversized for the small kid. Chuuya fell silent as his gaze never left the child who was thumbsucking in Dazai’s arms, part of his brain trying to figure out where he had seen the kid and another part trying to fathom why Dazai had come to his apartment with him in the first place.//or Atsushi gets turned into a child and Chuuya and Dazai has tot ake care of him, Akutagawa is somehow involved?

I’ll Hold You Close, and Half of Us Closer by doubleblack :

multi-chptrs, on going, mpreg. a lovelly fic. a very needed fluff. “This is the baby.” The doctor smiled. “They look like a little spot right now since you’re not far along. And that is their very strong heartbeat.“Chuuya and Dazai smiled as they looked at the ultrasound of their baby. The doctor printed out the ultrasounds of their baby. She prescribed Chuuya prenatal vitamins, told him he was 10 weeks along, and that he would be due early December. Chuuya and Dazai were now on their way home, and Dazai held Chuuya’s hand as he was driving home.“If Mori finds out…”“He won’t.” Dazai stated. “And even if he did. I will not let anyone hurt you or our baby. Ever. I will destroy the whole Port Mafia before I ever let that happen.” its cuuuuuute. its a journey that i would love to see.

Lips by SilentSoukoku:

cut and unexpected! “My dearest Chuuya, do you even take care of your lips? Look at how cracked they are!” did you died yet? coz I did! one shot

Waste of Bandage’s by ChuuChan1994:

hilarious, cute, amazing! one shot. Chuuya is getting along better with the ADA, that still doesn’t mean he’s willing to put up with Dazai’s bullshit. Where Akutagawa was use to the sight, Atsushi was left gaping at the sight before him.

Just like we agreed by codenamecat:

I will say on thing : Yosano is a b adass  Goddnes. thats all. one shot and smut sorry but its funny and fluffy  too. “I’ve been giving you excuses to leave since the very beginning, why won’t you just do what we’re both waiting for and take your gross ass away from here?!”Dazai tilted his head, his expression suggesting that he suddenly forgot his mother tongue and didn’t understand a word of what Chuuya just said.“Who said that it’s what I want?”

bounded by fate by Nekito :

super interesting multi-chptrs, AU!!! kouyou never took chuuya in and chuuya never joins the mafia, thus never meeting dazai when they were kids; instead chuuya lives 22 years a normal life until he mets dazai; dazai’s connections with the port mafia however soon causes problems on going.

Without Gods, Without Guidance by dancing_dazai :

another super interesting AU but with Gods! niiice and very promising!Without gods, without guidance, By the window, a woman has passed on; the white sky is blind, the white wind is cold.-The Hour of Death, Chuuya NakaharaTwo lost souls find their way to Quindecim with no memories of who they are or how they got there, and they’re determined to get their lives back. No matter the cost. multi-chptrs and on going

centrifugal/centripetal by TopHat69 :

my absolute favorite! majestic, powerful, overwelming, lovelu, lovely fic! multi-shptrs, omegaverse, on going their story from the begging but they are true mates. problem is that its more than they can handle. it what they need but Chuuya is not good at this and Dazai is too afraid. Chuuya wants to learn, to reach Dazai and Dazai want to be free and filfull a promise.

Cover Up by Satquael:

one shot and beautiful! It wasn’t long after they’d first met that Dazai noticed the tattoo. It was on the back of his neck, a bunch of letters and numbers that didn’t make any real sense. A serial number, of sorts.Chuuya had tried to hide it, understandably. Under his clothes, and then makeup. These solutions didn’t really work. Not in the long term, anyway. Clothes shifted, and makeup rubbed off.Dazai had a better idea.

lastly, will be too bad of me to share my works? I think that you may mostly like this fic:

Can you sew my suit? : Akutagawa and Atsushi are getting married and who is a better person to be their best man, but Dazai Osamu? Unfortunally, all guests has to wear newly sew suits, but Dazai missed the deadline for the order!Now, eight days before the wedding, Akutagawa sends Dazai to his last resolt; his good friend’s tailor shop, Nakahara Chuuya.However, his Dazai’s suit will not be the only thing fixed.Ch1.: the prologueCh2.: the meetingCh3.: a bonus

aaaaaaaaaand thats some of my favorite and amazinf fics i LOVE! hope you like them and happy reading! tell me what you think okay?

be well! :)

have a nice day!!!

[maryniss]

How Does Waiting Sound?

Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs

Summary:   How did Dazai named his ability?

Why won't Oda leave Dazai?

***

On a last mission before leaving the Port Mafia, Dazai and Chuuya finally find the perfect name for Dazai's ability.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationships: 

Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs)

Dazai Osamu&Oda Sakunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs)

Characters:

Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs) Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) Oda Sakunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs) Original Female Character(s) Yoko Ogawa

Tags: oh boy here we go - Freeform;thats why i dont like writing long fics because of the tags;anyway;Drugs;Drugs Made Them Do It;Underage Drinking;does chuuya care they are underage?fucking no;oh yeah;Swearing;Angst;Light Angst;Fluff;Nakahara Chuuya is ticklish;Blood and Violence;i selected blood kink accidentally there are no kinks here;Murder Family;Odasaku Hunts Dazai's Thoughts;Riding Motorcycles(aka Jenna)’Motorcycles;I love Chuua's motorbike as much as I love cherry's carla’Port Mafia Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs);But he quits the very next day so not pm dazai really idk;Tags Are Hard;i wrote this because the thought of how dazai named his ability kept me up at night;and yeh;I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping;soukoku kiss i forgot to tell y'all that;Gentle Kissing

Notes: Pfff...cant believe i finished this im so happy rn. so i have one important thing to say before.

YOKO OGAWA is a real Japanese writer. This here doesn't make any assumptions about her real life persona, this is only a fanfic. That is all.

OK, yo now lets see. So, what is this fic really about? idk but soukoku kiss so im happy with that.listened to this while writing hehe

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4mIVbG8EnA6JgSqzgk87pA?si=LVJB_uZyRQqIIMejQeSzgg

           Dazai smiles, even if he is not happy.

           Dazai smiles because he is happy.

           Dazai never cries.

           He smiled at that moment when his life changed. That day when he got a good beating from a child much smaller than him (even if that stubborn redhead would never agree with him about their height)

           Dazai always thought that he was special. He was indeed. After all, the people around him were human. They died. Everyday. Every single day, before his eyes. Sometimes, he killed them himself. Other times, he had to witness blood shed from afar.

           It still hurt. But, he got used to it. He was strong enough to do so. It was like he didn’t feel it anymore, actually. Just like when you get used to the sound of a broken clock; it is as if it never existed in the first place.

           But, Dazai felt something, he was just burrowed too deep into his thoughts to reach his feelings. He... he felt like he was...

           No Longer Human. Dazai spent a lot of time thinking about the name of his ability (and, no, we would never tell anyone how it got that name; personal reasons) and he concluded that it fit perfectly.

           Walking down on a random street, Dazai thought about it again. Actually, he had told somebody about the origin of his ability’s name. The sun threw pretty, orange, almost transparent curtains of light, making Dazai seem like an angel that has just ascended from Hell.

           He stopped and looked around himself. He knew that his instincts would not fool him; he knew the street he was on.

           If he turned around the corner, he would find the bar, the same as always. Unchanged, as his feelings. 

           He hated himself. Not only when he was going to the bar, even though he promised himself that he would never go there again. Not only when he let everyone around him down. Not only when he did what he thought was right instead of what he wanted.

           He hated himself in general. And, to tell you a secret, there was only one other person Dazai hated. 

           He entered in the bar and, as always he saw Oda sitting there.

           “Were have you been? You are late! , “smiled his friend with a drink already prepared in his hand.

           Dazai sat down in the cold and empty room. He did not have time to tell Odasaku how he got to name his ability. 

           “The usual?, “ asked the bartender.

           “Mhm, sure.” 

           Dazai relaxed against the back of the chair. There was a clock in that room, but it was broken. 

           “Hard day?” Odasaku’s tone was concerned. Dazai smiled to himself and nodded.

           “Kind of. How about you?”

           “Nothing special.”

           The barman brought two glasses of whiskey and put them on the table. Dazai looked at them and saw nothing, nothing more than the person who should have drank that, right next to him.

           “You know, actually, there is something that I want to tell you.”

           Oda left his glass back on the counter and smiled at Dazai. 

           “Do tell. I am pretty bored. What could happen that would make you want to talk like that, so suddenly?” 

           Tik-tok-tik-tik-tok. The clock on the wall sang its broken song.

           “It’s not a so good story; but I want to tell you.”

           “Ok, I am listening, Dazai.”

           The brown-haired man inhaled deeply and looked at the glass in his hand. He then drank it all and slammed it against the table. The drink next to him was untouched. Dazai called for the bartender and ordered two more drinks. 

           “Ok, so where should I start?” Tik-tik-tok-tok-tik-tok.

           “From where you see fit.”

           Dazai tried to remember. The details of the day his life had once again taken a 180 turn. It        was late spring, or maybe already summer, and the sun was setting almost shyly. 

           “Yeah, it was a golden afternoon. And the sun was smiling down upon…”

           “Wait, I already know this story.” Dazai looked puzzled. He was sure he never told Oda this one. Their drinks were waiting on the counter. Tree, in total and one empty glass.

           “Are you sure? I don’t remember...”

           “No, I don’t actually know this one in particular. But, I do know who this is about.”

           Dazai understood then and he smiled melancholically. The Oda in his hallucinations really knew him that well, huh? He bet that the real one would have also guessed.

           “Whenever you talk about that person, you get all poetic and dramatic, as you are covering yourself with another layer of protection, so that no one can see into your heart. “

           Dazai gulped and took a mouthful of whiskey. The alcohol burned down his throat, and then up again to his brain. It was not a big problem; Dazai could handle his drinks quite well (or so he thought).

           “Well, you are right, but you’ll hear me anyway, right? It’s not like you have a place to be. And this one it’s not like all the stories about Chuuya that I told you before.” 

           Dazai may sound all confident when he talked; but deep in his heart, in that numb place of his heart, where he could not reach his frozen emotions, he was scared. If he would had have problems with his kidneys, he would probably piss himself very often and not only because of his disease.

           Oda sighed and the clock on the wall did too. The sound of something that doesn’t function anymore.

           “Of course, go on. I won’t interrupt you anymore.”

***

           “Oi, I can’t believe that old geezer! Putting us to work when he is relaxing in some exotic country! ,”said Chuuya, not so subtly, drawing other’s people attention. The afternoon sun was making him look like an angel that had just descended from Heaven. His hair was high-up in a ponytail and it was the first time Dazai saw him without his hat.

           He was beautiful, not that Dazai would ever admit that to Chuuya, god no! He wouldn’t even admit it to himself. He always caught himself staring; against his own will, of course. He liked to look into Chuuya’s eyes. Because he felt like they were alike. They tried to hide their feelings; or, better said, never got a chance to expose them in the first place.

           Chuuya’s eyes were always full of light. Nor hatred, nor any other emotion tainted them. They were pure and Dazai admired him for that. He would never tell Chuuya that, again, that was a very big no.

           But, it was something. To have eyes blue like the sea, like the reflection of a world full of freedom, like the blue sky Dazai could never see completely. Everything was written there.

           “Now, where is that building and those bastards? Let’s kick their assess quicker, ‘cause I wanna   drink something.” Dazai smiled at his partner and showed him to turn left.

           “Oh, Chuuya, but you are still underage! You can’t drink! , “ said Dazai, being surprised at his own words. It was not like him to make such comments. Irrational and not funny at all.

           “You really are dumb, right? If I am going to go beat some guys and steal whatever, I am sure that I am allowed to drink. It’s not like I have respected the law before.”

           They walked down a dark alley, chatting or fighting or both at the same time, because that’s how their conversations usually work. Dazai telling Chuuya that he liked his shoes; Chuuya checking to see if he really did take his good pair today;  Dazai shattering all of his hopes down and laughing everything off; and then Chuuya smacking his partner and mumbling not-so-beautiful nicknames.

           That’s how they work. Like a broken clock.

           But, even broken clocks strike sometimes the right hour. They may have seem to not pay attention around them, but it was quite the opposite actually.

           They knew they reached their destination, so they tried to focus on the shadows around them; on the sounds of steps that were so loud, even if both Chuuya and Dazai could feel the effort of the people following them to not be heard.

           They silently looked at each other.

           “We finish this fast and then we go to drink somethin’?”

           “Ok, but if you get drunk you’ll let me drive your motorcycle.” Chuuya seemed to hesitate, but he also didn’t want to go drinking alone. He was not afraid or something, it just felt lonely…

           They finally reached the building from where they were supposed to extract…

           “What are we supposed to take from here? , “ whispered Chuuya. “ Is there some human trafficking that we should take care of?”

           “I think that somebody took something from Mori-san, like documents or boring things like that, “whispered Dazai back.

           “I swear that I’ll kill that man if he ever sends me to bring him some piece of paper.” Dazai chuckled and looked one more time at the building.

           Yeah, of course it had to be a night club. Why did fancy people (or actually people who considered themselves fancy) always came to nightclubs? Where were they supposed to search for those papers? In somebody’s underwear, or what?      

           And this one didn’t look like a very expensive one. The big sigh with “ NightClub Insomnia” shined pink and green, those cheap neon ones. The windows were dark, so you could not see inside. Or maybe there were just some thick curtains.

           Chuuya moved forward and stopped, making  a disgusted face.

           “Eww, here smells like piss and bear.”

           “Let’s go inside then, though I think that there smells even worse, “  answered Dazai. The moon was already high in the sky, illuminating Chuuya’s fragile silhouette. The brown-haired man almost laughed at himself. Fragile? Yeah, sure. He should say that after he beats Chuuya at a one-on-one fight; though he liked when he is being pinned down, and when the redhead smirks triumphantly from above him, his long hair almost brushing over Dazai’s lips…

           “Are we going or are you afraid that you’ll be kicked out because you are  a minor?”

           Dazai snapped out of his dreams and focused on the mission at hand. After they are done, he would go with Chuuya to drink. And he has time to admire his partner (and hate himself for doing so) afterwards.

           “Well, if the police catches us, we can just beat them.”

           And, so, Dazai and Chuuya entered on the club’s door.

           From afar, Yoko Ogawa was observing them. She gestured and her guardians nodded.

           The woman resisted licking her lips ( a nervous tic that she has since she was little)  as she looked at the two young boys trying to make their way through the crowd. The night has only started, and she already had them where she wanted.

           Lights, loud music, neon colors, dancing, people and sweat, drugs, drinking, and the smell of cheap wine and beer, mixed with another one that Chuuya had sensed since he first arrived. An old woman sitting in the corner, wishing she had listened to her wife. She should have took some lip balm with him.

           Well, it was not so important. Because, that night was the night she would catch the Double Black. Soukoku. She would be the one to do so.

           Soukoku, huh? Just a bunch of kiddos. Yoko Ogawa had two reasons that forced her to break her first marriage, and another two that forced him to get married again with her second wife, the one that was always telling her to use lip balm.

           The first reason that determined her to divorce from his wife was that she was not good with children. She didn’t have the patience, the determination to play with such despicable creatures.

           And there was another one… oh yeah. Because she accidentally killed his children.

           Well, this was her wife’s fault! She should have not left her with them!

           She did once, she could do it again. She whispered: “You are dead, Soukoku”, but the club’s liveliness made his words seem dull and not true at all.

***

             There are 3 glasses still full of whiskey on the table. There are 3 glasses with only the ice left in them.

           “It’s pretty hard to tell this story in the 3rd person,” sighs Dazai, propping his head in his hand. The room is still empty and cold; he gathers all the drink in one place and puts them in a circle.  

           “Why are you telling it in 3rd person then? You can… , “ he stopped and reached for the glasses that Dazai was playing with. “ That’s mine, you can order more if you want to do whatever you were doing with them.”

           “Ok, ok here you are.”

           “Thanks. So, why are you not using the first person?”

           “Well, that’s because this is not only my story. You’ll see.”

           The clock made a disharmonic sound. The room was quiet then for a while and Dazai took another deep breath. That was the moment that their plan to go drinking went wrong. Though Dazai got to ride Chuuya’s motorbike afterwards.

***

           “You were right, it really does smell worse here,” yelled Chuuya, trying to make himself heard over the sound of the tasteless music that some DJ- Chuuya would very much like to go and teach that DJ what good music was supposed to sound like- was playing.

           “I don’t know what you are saying. This smell kind of reminds me of your apartment. There is the same smell of cheap wine and…”

           “That’s because of a certain someone only buying me wine at the smallest price!”

           “You should go buy your own wine then!” A woman, almost naked of course, approached Dazai and put her hands on his shoulders. The brown-haired man pushed the woman away; her breath was smelling like beer and there was another odor, a musky and sour one that made Dazai scrunch his nose.

           “I am sorry, but I have no such tastes in women,” said Dazai and went on, trying to catch up with Chuuya. He could his small partner ahead of him, avoiding the strippers that were coming for him like a wild group of animals comes for its prey.

           “Chuuya, look there!,” shouted Dazai, trying to get the chibi’s attention. Chuuya turned to him and followed the direction that Dazai was showing with his hand.

           There were the men that they had to meet to retrieve the documents. Port Mafia didn’t like to spill blood uselessly. So, Mori-san gave them the order to try and negotiate first for the documents, giving them some money in return.

           Neither Dazai, nor Chuuya understood the old man. They could just beat those guys and take the documents and that was.

           It was almost as if there was something that they didn’t know; as if they were fooled; as if they were going right inside a trap.

           Yeah, Dazai knew that was very probably. A trap. He was more than sure about it. He didn’t know if Chuuya realized this; but he trusted his partner. He knew that Chuuya could protect himself, even if he was being in disadvantage. For fuck’s sake, Chuuya was literally a god, so Dazai should not worry about the redhead so much.

           The brown-haired man looked around. An elegant dressed woman, wearing red lipstick, her hair tied up in a practical bun, sitting on a celadon sofa, that was probably bought from the SecondHand shop next to the club; Dazai could tell that the sofa was not very comfortable, but what could you expect from such a place? She didn’t seem like a bad person. Besides her, there were two women. Dazai scanned them quickly. A gun hung loosely next to their hip. It was pretty dark, but Dazai could also see the shine of some small, sharp blades. Total: around six. There could also be some hidden ones, in their boots, their hair and maybe even a small bomb in their mouth. He was not so sure, but they needed to pay attention.

           Chuuya and Dazai looked at each other. After years of missions when they needed to be silent, they developed some kind of secret language only between two them; almost like they could reach each other’s minds and pull out the thoughts directly from there.

           “Do they pose a threat to us?”

           “Maybe to you, I am capable of protecting myself.”            “Ok, but you won’t let me die this time, no?”

           “…did I ever let you down, Dazai?”

           Dazai smiled.

           “No, chibi, let’s go. We do this quick and then we go to that new bar, right?”

           “I swear, if you call me…” Chuuya stopped mid-sentence, looking somewhere between Dazai. He blinked four times and then he took hold of Dazai’s hand.

           “We gotta go, Dazai. This is not ok. Fuck the files, this is a big ass trap. We haven’t been careful enough…”

           Dazai turned to see what frightened Chuuya so. He blinked himself, telling himself that it was impossible. This mission should have been an easy one. What kind of Ability User did they have the luck to stumble across this time?

           The club was slowly melting, its walls, people and everything peeling down, letting bright sunlight come in.

           “Come on, Dazai, move!” The brown-haired man needn’t be told twice. It was not like them to run; normally, Dazai would not run with Chuuya. But, that day was the last day when he would be recognized, officially, as a member of the Port Mafia. He did not want to go around, killing people as some kind of maniac.

           He was crazy, he knew that already. But, even crazy people had their moments. Just like broken clocks.

           And, Chuuya always run. Not because there was something that he could not handle. Dazai bet that his partner could fight with a dragon from those fairytales Oda used to read kids before sleep and he would win, without even scratching himself. Maybe he was foolish and greedy to think that Chuuya was scared for him, for Dazai; maybe he was just blinded by the light coming from Chuuya’s eyes to think that the redhead really did care for him that much.

           “Ok, Chuuya, let’s go.” They did not get out in time. They didn’t and Dazai is somewhat glad because of that.

***

           “Could you just bring me an entire bottle? I am feeling bad for always telling you to bring two more glasses of whiskey,” chuckled Dazai, not a hint of nervousness in his tone. The barman nodded. Dazai looked at the bar’s door and then at the clock on the wall. He could almost hear Ango coming in, mumbling something to himself, and then taking a seat next to Dazai, sighing and ordering something to drink.

           Dazai knew that he would never come here again.

           “Well, what happened then? Why did you stop?” Oda looked at him with tired eyes, yet ready to find out whatever Dazai wanted to tell him.

           “Just a moment of silence. I thought about my friend who died right before this story took place.” Tik-tok-tok-tik…

           “Oh? Do I know them? Who is this friend of yours?”

           “You.”

           The bartender came with two bottles in his hands and put them on the counter.

           “I only said one, though.”

           “The other one is for the man right there,” said he, nodding towards the empty chair where Odasaku should have been.

           “There is no one there.” The bartender lifted his shoulders and shook his head. He filled his arms with the empty glasses Dazai had drank and smiled fondly at the only client that was still coming to his bar. And then he left, leaving Dazai with the sound of a broken clock and his very own hallucinations.

           “I can’t believe that you didn’t order one bottle for me,” laughed Oda, punching Dazai lightly. The brown-haired man sighed; it really was a mistake to come there, but it didn’t matter anymore.

           “Old men can’t handle their drinks,” answered he, sipping the remaining whiskey from his glass.

           “Hey, I’m only five years older than you.”

           “You are…” Dazai bit his tongue. He almost said “dead”. “Ok, let’s continue the story, then. If not, I feel like I am going to fall asleep and you will never know what happened.” Oda nodded and Dazai started to tell his story again.

***

           Chuuya and Dazai did not stop to look; they had enough experience to be able to apply the rule number 1 in such cases: never look. You can think about it afterwards. First survive.

            The club was collapsing, the people transforming into thin smoke threads. Glass shattered on the floor had also started to disappear and then there was no sign of the location where Dazai and Chuuya should have had a nice and reasonable conversation to take back those documents.

           They were now on an island, both of them could hear the distinctly sound of waves of the sea. Seagulls flew above them and as both of them stared up, at the blinding sun, at the clear, blue, day sky, somebody approached them.

           “Welcome! My dear kids, this is the Memory Police! Couldn’t be more happy to have you here!”

           Chuuya and Dazai turned back and faced the woman they saw in the club. She was alone this time. The two exchanged a look.

           “She is the Ability User.”

           “Well, we are not very happy that we are here so,let’s go back so we can take those documents and bring them to our boss.” The woman smiled; now Dazai saw that she was not wearing red lipstick, but a purple one. She didn’t look as pretty as before.

           “You know that you can’t keep us here with only an Ability, right?, “continued Dazai, all while shooting his most charming smile at the woman.

           He was more than sure that the island they were on was part of her ability, so one touch and it would probably vanish. Actually, he was standing on it already, so it was probably already melting, but given that it was such a big object it would take longer for it to go away. But, whatever other spells there were hidden on the island, Dazai nullified them all.

           “Oh, I do know that, which is why I don’t intend on keeping you here…”

           Chuuya was done listening to the woman’s crap. “What the…,” he threw some gravity discs in her direction, “fuck do you want?” The woman didn’t even move; she raised her arm and made a swift motion, as if she was at a concert and she was the bandmaster.  The discs vanished. Chuuya and Dazai were left looking at her surprised; but then they remember the number one rule, the golden rule they must always follow.

           They had to do something, but what could they? Why wasn’t Dazai’s ability working already? And what was that from before? Could the woman also nullify somebody’s gift? There were too many questions and Dazai had the answer to only one of it.

           No, the woman didn’t have the same ability as Dazai, because that would mean that there was somebody else, another Ability User that brought them to the island. Also, she didn’t even had to touch the discs, they simply went voosh and bye-bye Chuuya’s attack. So, it had to be the island. Maybe this was like some sort of environment where she was able to do whatever she pleased and whatever satisfied her. In other words, a secluded space where she ruled every single rock, every single tiny bit of sand, every single force and every single person.

           Well, that would have been bad, if only Dazai wasn’t there. After all, that was his job: to make him and Chuuya un-vulnerable to such attacks. But, why was it not working? Maybe he should get closer to the woman, maybe if he touched her…

           “Chuuya, let’s do the thing we did then, when we had to steal those diamonds…you know.” The redhead looked at his partner. He sometimes couldn’t believe that such a fragile person (even though Dazai was much taller than him, but we do NOT talk about that here, in the Port Mafia gang) could make his world so much more than the red angry he used to see. That was before he met Dazai. After that, after they became a team, there was always a black dot in Chuuya’s red world that was jumping and fooling around, making the boy’s head spun.

           Chuuya hated that little, tiny, stupid thing! He hated it for confusing him so!

           But, it was nice. To be able to see something else than red. Something else than blind anger.

              “Are you sure it’s gonna work?” Chuuya asked just because he was used to do so. He trusted his partner completely, meaning that he would follow whatever plans Dazai came up with.

           “Have I ever let you down, chibi?”

           Chuuya smiled. Did he really hate that Dazai called him chibi? Yes.

           “Well, if you say so…but don’t call me that anymore.”

           Chuuya smiled. Did he really hate that Dazai called him chibi? No.

           Dazai winked and the redhead rolled his eyes. From somewhere very close to them, they could hear the waves crashing onto whatever they were sitting on (an island, an ability or a giant lion-turtle with magical powers). The seagulls seemed agitated – maybe a storm was coming.

           “Well, lady, we would love to stay, but he have to go.” Dazai backed a few feet away, discovering that Chuuya was no more by his side. He could see the hole that his partner dug for them to escape, the sand starting to cover it up already.

           “Oh no, I am afraid I can’t do that.” Yoko Ogawa smiled.

           ‘You see, this is my island. Not some playground for such bastards like you.”

           And, suddenly, Chuuya was above Dazai’s head floating in the air and the brown-haired could see that he was not using his ability. The redhead looked down and wriggled his legs, he tried to come down but to no use; he got the same feeling as when he was a kid and he couldn’t control his ability.  But, now, it wasn’t he that was the problem.

           “Dazai, do something!”

           Dazai looked at his partner and there were a hundred thought that flooded onto him at the same time. Unfortunately, his instincts took over before he could react rationally. Dazai shot Yoko; she didn’t dodge, she just stopped the bullet with her very own hand.

           The little piece of metal was not on the island anymore. When she opened her palm, there was no sign of her previous action; the skin was  fine. That did not surprise Dazai. He had a vague idea of what the woman’s ability was…

           “DAZAI. I swear to god, I-“

           “Shh, little Chuuya,” said Dazai flashing a snakey smile at his friend, “the adults are trying to solve this.”

           Yoko Ogawa laughed. The seagulls flew over their heads, not a care in the world. Did they care that Chuuya was hanging seven meters high up in the air and something happened to his ability?

           No! And guess who also did not? Dazai. Or at least, that’s what Chuuya thought.

           “You consider yourself an adult? Please, you can’t even drink legally.”

           “Well, maybe that’s true, but I still think like one. For example, your ability. What do I know about it? That it’s called “Memory Police”. Why I don’t know and I don’t care but I definitely won’t be coming to you to help me choose the name of my ability.” Dazai looked around discreetly. There really was no one around. Now, there was no turning back, anyway. He would just tell the woman what he knew and he would try to resonate with her. If not, there was Chuuya; he knew that he was not alone.

           “Oh and also, this island or whatever this is… this sand is not part of your ability. I don’t know, you probably put it here, but this is not a real island.”            If Yoko Ogawa was impressed, she didn’t show it.

           “You control everything here: even gravity, that’s what Chuuya can’t use his ability. Or, better said, using his ability doesn’t have any effect.”

           “Well, aren’t you a clever one?” Yoko looked at Chuuya and with another swift motion of her hand, she let him down. The redhead almost smashed head first if Dazai didn’t run to catch him.

           He did not fall into Dazai’s arm, unfortunately, because his long cultivated instincts kicked in and at the last moment he made a pillow of air to sustain himself and then he let himself down carefully.

           “You really are clever, but too bad you won’t be around here anymore to see the rest of the story.”

           “What…?” Dazai then realized. It was like a premonition; he knew what would happen and it really did happen like that: in the next three seconds, he was thrown around in a black hole, and he was back in  the club. The loud music (who played such bad music? Dazai should teach them a lesson later) and the neon lights were messing with his head; he felt like throwing up.

           “Wake up, pretty boy ‘cause mama has to give you some pills. You’ll feel better then.”

           A voice that Dazai very much did not like was the only thing he heard before he fell asleep. His last thoughts ran off to Chuuya.

           Dazai hated himself in general, but now that he had left Chuuya alone, his hatred towards himself seemed to increase. A little.

***                                                                                                                

           Dazai woke up on the island; he felt his limbs numb, and he tried to move them. He couldn’t, and that didn’t surprise him so much. The memories of what happened yesterday (had it already passed a day? It was hard to tell) came to him slowly and he opened his eyes, even if the bright light was uncomfortable.

           He could hear the seagulls, the waves of the sea; and he could smell the salty wind. His eyes started to adjust, but his vision was still a bit hazy. Dazai could see that he was somewhere above the ground, in a metal cage. He did not see Yoko Ogawa.

           “Chuuya. Where is Chuuya?”

            Dazai found the answer to his question in no time. In the same cage as him, too far away for Dazai to reach and touch him, there was Chuuya, breathing hard. His head was hanging loosely and the red hair covered almost all of his face. He could see that Chuuya was trembling and he could also see the sweat glistening off him in the light of the artificial sun. Chuuya never sweated. Dazai suspected that both of them had been drugged.

           “Chuuya…Hey, Chuuya,” whispered Dazai, his voice going hoarse in the middle of the sentence. The redhead didn’t move. His hands were pinned above his head, cuffed with iron chains covering his small palms completely. His long-sleeved shirt revealed some delicate skin; and Dazai then saw it.

           How could he not from the start, he didn’t know. Chuuya’s hands where covered in that red, snake-like pattern that Dazai did very much not like; the stripes seemed alive, as if there was something impure lurking under his skin, some kind of disease, some kind of  filthy demon. Dazai shuddered.

            So, his partner used Corruption. What was he thinking? Didn’t he knew that the woman controlled everything on the island? That he had no chance of winning?

           But, why was he not doing anything now? How much time has passed since Chuuya was in that state? Again, Dazai was left with too many unanswered questions.

           He tried to calm himself. He looked above himself and saw that his hands were also pinned up like Chuuya’s. He tried to think logically; would Chuuya use Corruption if Dazai was not around, if he hadn’t chance to come back to his human-self? No. That was for sure.

           Which meant that it had to do either with the island, with Yoko Ogawa’s ability or with the fact that they both have been drugged. Dazai chose the second option. So, what was it? What kind of drug? He could only take guess: maybe it was something that brought Corruption to surface; and even if Chuuya tried to use the ability, he could not, because Yoko was controlling the gravity around him, so that he could not escape.

           So, the woman was probably around here. Dazai should be careful about what he was saying, about how he revealed his plans to Chuuya. But, Yoko Ogawa didn’t know that Dazai figured that much, so maybe he could use that to his advantage.

           A seagull stopped on the cage, making it move a little.

           “Are you awake already?” The voice came from down, from under the cage. It made sense; it was the only place where Dazai could not see. The brown-haired man didn’t say anything, and the other part also stopped asking questions.

           Right now, Dazai had one big problem; he needed to touch Chuuya, so that he could deactivate Corruption. But, how? He didn’t even feel his hands. He didn’t feel his whole body, damn it!

           “Chuuya, are you awake?, “ asked Dazai, but he got no response. He knew that the woman was clever; she did manage to bring them into this situation, after all,  so he had to be careful.

           “Chuuya!” This time, Dazai called his friend loud enough that it was impossible for Yoko not to hear.

           “Oh, so you are awake. Then shall I explain the situation you are into right now? You have to understand the rules of the game form the start, so that you don’t make any mistakes.” Dazai tried moving his fingers, but he wasn’t sure if he succeeded or not; they were like a piece of meat attached to his body with a rope. Useless.

           “If you would be so kind.” Dazai could almost hear the smile in the woman’s voice as she spoke.

           “Well, I think that you figured pretty much already, but I am too excited so I am going to tell it to you once more. So, you both have been given a drug. Yours is just something plain, and it was not administrated in a big quantity; you still need to see this plan unfold right before your eyes and you can’t be high for that to happen.” She stopped and took a deep breath. She seemed to be happy with herself. At the same time, Chuuya made a slight movement, but Dazai saw it. His friend was starting to wake up. It was going good.

           “And, well maybe you asked yourself: what does that drug exactly do? And maybe you thought that it brings out the god-form of your partner. And you are right, but not entirely. Because this drug doesn’t only bring your partner’s inner demon…”

           Dazai clenched his teeth. Chuuya was more of a human that that woman would ever be. Chuuya was not a demon; maybe he looked like one, maybe he sometimes acted like one (only around Dazai though), but he was not a demon.

           How should Dazai put this? He always found himself admiring Chuuya, that succeeded in keeping his humanity, even when he had the powers of a god. Dazai couldn’t even do that, he, a regular person.

           Chuuya was more human than Dazai would ever be.

           “…it forces the kid to fight with it.” Dazai almost missed the last part as he tried to escape from his shackles. He stopped his action at once. What did Yoko mean?

           Suddenly, Chuuya jerked forward. His chains hit the metal bars of the cage and clinked; like the bells on a wedding day. It was as a veil had been put over Dazai’s eyes, over his intern logic. He felt physical pain by just looking at Chuuya, just by looking at his small partner struggling like a trapped animal, his body spasming uncontrollably. And, all Dazai could do was watch.

           Dazai always thought that he was special. He was indeed. After all, the people around him were human. They died. Everyday. Every single day, before his eyes. Sometimes, he killed them himself. Other times, he had to witness blood shed from afar.

           Chuuya cried in pain. He was breathing hard, almost chocking on something that was not there. His eyes were hollow; two white, milky spheres, showing no emotion, empty. There was a liquid rolling down his cheeks, from his eyes, something like tears, but with a coarse density. Chuuya was shaking and crying and Dazai could not do anything.

           “See, this is the thing the drug does. He will die in no time.”

           It still hurt. But, he got used to it. He was strong enough to do so. It was like he didn’t feel it anymore, actually.

           No, this time, Dazai would not get over it. He just lost Odasaku. He could not lose Chuuya. Not him. Not him, not him, not him…

           His head was spinning. He lied, he lied. Dazai fucking lied! He felt it all, he felt the pain, he felt the guilt of his past actions hanging around his neck, suffocating him every time he tried to go down, towards the mortal world, towards what he loves. He hated it.

           Dazai fainted. Right then and right there. It was too much, too much, too much, even for him. Tears poured out of his close eyes; he had finally let his guard down.

           The seagulls sang a song only for the two of them; only for Chuuya and Dazai to hear. The birds sang in their crooked voice; they sounded like a broken clock.

           Chuuya fainted from all the pain shortly after his partner, but he knew he was not going to die. After all, he had somebody else to protect from death.

***

           Dazai woke up in white room. To be honest, he had first thought that he died. That was how he always thought the afterlife would look like.

                       Well, he would have definitely be dead if there wasn’t a certain redhead lying motionless on the floor. Suddenly, the memories of the club, of the island, of Chuuya shouting in pain came back to Dazai and he ran towards his friend.

           It couldn’t be… Were they both dead? No, no…

           He knelt down and checked Chuuya’s pulse. There was nothing. But, his partner did look normal. He didn’t have the red stripes over his body anymore. But, he was not breathing. Did they really die? Was that…

           Chuuya sit up straight, slamming his head into Dazai’s nose. The redhead coughed a fistful of blood and then wiped his mouth with a gloved hand.

           “Chuuya~!,” screamed Dazai in surprise.

           “What the fuck… Where are we?”

           Chuuya looked around, clearly confused. Actually, what was there to look at? They were literally in a room (or maybe it was a white infinity) and the boy seemed even paler than before.

           “Ah…” Chuuya shoved his head into his hands. “Don’t you tell me you actually convinced me to commit double-suicide with you!”

           The redhead took Dazai by the collar of his coat and swung him around.

           “Or, what stupid thing did you do to bring us into this kinda situation? I swear…” Dazai laughed wholeheartedly and Chuuya raised his fist. Ah, yes. The good ol’ fight between friends – or whatever they were.

           “Chuuya, don’t! Wait, let me explain!” The little boy calmed down a bit. He took a deep breath and sat on the floor, cross-legged. Or maybe it was the ceiling or another wall. He didn’t even want to think about their situation. His head hurt already so bad, and he still had to deal with the nuisance in front of him.

           “Ok, then go on, you shitty…”

           “Shh, Chuuya, don’t use such words,” said Dazai, putting his index finger on Chuuya’s lips. The redhead looked at it and his blue eyes hid emotions Dazai could not recognize. But, whatever was lying there, he could for sure say that those ocean-like orbits were luminous. So bright and so lovely, Dazai would love to drown in them. A perfect way to die, he considered. He sighed; if only Chuuya would let him.

           “OUCH! CHUUYA!” Dazai retreated his wounded finger and looked at his partner. There was a fresh, red stain on Chuuya’s lips, from the blood that had flowed out Dazai fingers; Chuuty really bit him!

           “What are you, seventh grade? A dog should not bite his master!!” As Dazai was wrapping up a small bandage over his finger, Chuuya licked his lips; such a salty taste made him shiver for some reason.

           “And, for you to know, it was not my fault. You tried to shut me up! From using cursed words or whatever… Fuck that, I always curse!”

           Dazai made a tsk-tsk sound, but said nothing more. Chuuya looked at him and sighed, laying on his back. He thought about the situation they were in. It was most likely a dream caused by the drugs he and Dazai have been injected with.

           He would not want to wake up.

           “Chuuya, let’s play a game! I’m bored! Let’s play truth or dare!”

           He would very much like to wake up.

           “Oi, Dazai, shut up I am trying to think.” No, he wasn’t but Dazai didn’t knew that.

           “Oh, ok, I’ll be quiet, you need after all some practice.” Chuuya did not say anything; every word would be like fuel to an already massive fire. He, for once, shut up.

           Did he think that Dazai would leave him alone? Yeah.

           Did Dazai leave him alone? Nope.

           “Chuuya~! Let’s play, please!! I’ve got some really good questions!”

           The redhead ignored him at first, pretending to be asleep. Of course Dazai hadn’t fallen for it. The brown-haired man decided that if that was how Chuuya would play, then he wouldn’t be nice either. With only a war-like scream, Dazai hurled over Chuuya and started to tickle his sides. Chuuya burst out in laughter, trying to push Dazai off, but without succeeding.

           “Dazai you ~haha~ little brat, if I put my hands on you!!~stop –hahah- don’t tickle me there!”

           “I’ll stop if you play Truth or Dare with me.” Chuuya continued to laugh and he chocked, but Dazai had no mercy. He tickled him until his fingers hurt.

           “Ok, ok, ~hiC~ I’ll play, get off you mother ~HIc~fucker…”

           Dazai got off in an instant, clearly pleased with himself. Chuuya tried to catch his breath; the touch of Dazai’s fingers still felt so real to him. There, on his left ribs, a little lower than his heart, where he was most ticklish. There on his stomach, where Chuuya didn’t like to be touched (he didn’t mind now tho). There on…

           What was he thinking?

           He got up, sitting with his legs crossed again. He eyes Dazai that was also standing like that, at only 4 inches away from him. He reached out and punched his friend.

           “I’ll kill you, Dazai, you shitty suicidal maniac, if you ever do that to me again!” Dazai only laughed; he was already good friends with these kind of threats; that he knew would never actually happen.

           “Ok, Chuuya, you go first!” Chuuya sighed.

           “Geez, I feel like a seventh grader, not that I’ve actually been to school before…”

           “You do have the behavior of a seventh grader, but unfortunately not the brains of one.”

           “Do you want to have no brains at all?”

           “Is this the question you are asking for the game? Then, no I don’t really, but I would rather blow them up myself. Not the best way to go, but it’s an option, I guess.”

           Chuuya shook his head. How did he end with such a moron?

           “How can we play when you are making this so difficult?” yelled Chuuya, suddenly wanting to slap Dazai. In fact, no, it wasn’t suddenly, he always wanted to slap Dazai, yes, the urge was always there. And moments like these was what it took for him to actually do it.

           “Chuu~huya, it’s not your turn anymore!” sang Dazai, smiling and provoking Chuuya with his gaze. The redhead calmed himself; he should not use his energy on that bastard after all. He sighed again; he felt like he did that too often when he was around Dazai. He did it rhythmically, like the sound of a good, completely functioning clock.

           “Ok, then you go now.” Dazai beamed and Chuuya’s heart sink; was that what made him happy?

           “Chibi…”

           “Don’t call me that.”

           “Shrimp…”

           “If you call me that, I’ll call you mackerel for the rest of our lives.”

           “My life won’t last, I’ll make sure of it so I don’t really care.”

           “Just ask the question already.”

           Dazai shot Chuuya an evil smile. The evilest smile Chuuya had ever seen. His brows furrowed. He was getting kind of scared…

           “Truth or Dare?”

           “What?” asked Chuuya, still a little bit lost into his thoughts.            

           “That’s how you play the game, chibi. Or did you not have someone to teach you that?”

           “O-of course I played before!” stuttered Chuuya and he tried to show Dazai that by looking directly into those brown-red eyes, eyes like the withered camellias in Chuuya’s room that he forgot to water. His lie didn’t get past Dazai; but the boy decided to drop it or else Chuuya might really beat him.

           “Ok then Truth or Dare?” Chuuya thought for a second.

           “Truth.” Dazai closed his eyes and put his hands together as if he was meditating. Chuuya rolled his eyes, but the corners of his mouth were still lifted upwards. Just a little bit.

           “Hm~It has to be a really good question…” Dazai sat like that for several minutes in which Chuuya just looked at him.

           He always thought Dazai was beautiful. Like a withered camellia. Don’t ask Chuuya why, he wasn’t good at poetic descriptions, Dazai just seemed like a camellia person. His hair was soft like the small petals of his favorite flower. He was even built like a camellia; slim and tall (Not so tall that Chuuya couldn’t outgrow him someday, though), a slender silhouette, that Chuuya felt like he should take care of everyday.

           Else, it would wither away.

           “Ok I know. Say Chuuya, is it true that a few days ago, when you screamed in the middle of the night was because Koyo waxed your leg?”

           Chuuya chocked on nothing. Well, that was true, but how did Dazai find out?

           “Uhm…Yeah, it’s true. It hurt like a bitch. I don’t know how women do that on a regular basis.”

           Dazai laughed out loud, startling Chuuya.

           “Why are you laughing, you miso-“ Dazai wiped a tear and lied down, looking at Chuuya upside down.

           “I am not laughing at women, I am laughing at you, ‘cause I didn’t expect you would admit it. Either way, I already knew because I was the one who set it up. I have also filmed it!”

           Chuuya was confused. He felt like Dazai would do that, he could really see him, but that was also something that he did not expect.

           “You… what?”

***

           “Dazai, I think that’s enough drinks you had there,” said Oda, visibly concerned for his friend. The bar smelled like his favorite whiskey; Dazai held a glass in his hand, the bottle the bartender had bought more than three quarters empty.

           “BOOO, you shut up, you just a hallucination…” Dazai looked at Oda through half closed eyelids. The clock on the wall made a ding-dong sound, reminding them that the midnight had come. Dazai almost jumped off his chair.

           “Dazai, stop…”begged Oda, but the brown-haired man didn’t even cared as he chugged down the bottle.

           “No, Oda, I am not here to listen to you, you are here to listen to me.”

           `I have listened to you enough. I changed my life because you said so. You can also listen to me right now.`

           Dazai didn’t say that, but it wasn’t necessary because Odasaku heard it anyway. After all, he did live in Dazai’s head.

***

           They played Truth or Dare for hours. Days maybe? They didn’t know. It was like a dream; with each question, Chuuya and Dazai would insult each other more, would find more dark secrets about each other.

           With each question, Chuuya and Dazai would love each other more.

           Right now, Chuuya was standing in Dazai’s lap, the taller man (though Chuuya still had time to overgrow him! Let’s not forget that) combing his long fingers through the red hair. It wasn’t silky, but not wiry either. It smelled like strawberries.

           The room they were in wasn’t white anymore. It was filled with their stories and with their laughter, with their love, with their hate for each other. It was more like a pretty orange-pink shade. Their voices echoed in the colorful infinity.

           “Chuuya, it’s your turn.”

           “I feel like we don’t even have what to ask each other anymore.” Dazai started braiding Chuuya’s hair gently, careful not to hurt the boy in his lap.

           “Come on, think of something.” Chuuya closed his eyes and scrunched his nose.

           “Dazai, do you really want to die? So bad that you…” Dazai’s hands stopped their movement and the room seemed to become colder. He cleared his throat; he was afraid that his voice would break when he gave Chuuya the answer. He gathered his courage and finally admitted to somebody else than himself.

           “Yes. But I’m a coward. I can’t do it. I love this world, even if it scares me. Even if it hurts. There are so many beautiful things here. And I’m just too afraid to leave them here.”

           Chuuya didn’t say anything, just placed himself better into Dazai’s lap.

           “I don’t think you are a coward. I think what you are doing is an act of dumb courage.”

           “Really?” laughed Dazai, starting to braid Chuuya’s hair again.

           “Yes. To decide to live into this world, to just live here alone… You feel lonely, don’t you? Since he died.”

           Dazai gasped. He knew who Chuuya was referring to. Was it yesterday that Odasku died? Or was it better than a week since then? Dazai couldn’t tell. But it hurt like hell. And it was still stinging his heart, like an open wound that will leave a very big scar.

           Dazai lied.

           “He was just a friend. I will get over it. I am used to this.”

           Chuuya suddenly reached for Dazai’s face and touched it with his gloved hands. It was as if they were high; high on their secrets, stories and whispers only they had ever heard.

           “Don’t lie.” Dazai averted his gaze.

           “It’s my turn. Truth or Dare?” Chuuya felt his heart sink.

           “Dare.” Dazai looked down at Chuuya again and got closer. Chuuya’s hair was half braided.

           “I dare you to kiss me.” Chuuya blinked and he looked into Dazai’s eyes. He saw it then; that sad happiness. He would do it; he wanted to. He wanted so bad to do it.

           “Ok.” Chuuya lifted his head and Dazai lowered his. Their lips found each other, almost clumsily and it was only a brief touch but both their hearts felt like they would jump from their chests and ran off together, lost into the colorful infinity that only the two of them had built.

           They alone. They were alone together.

           They kissed delicately, and the next thing they knew, they were back into the cage on the beach. Back to reality and their separate loneliness.

***

           The sun was setting lazily behind Dazai. He opened his eyes and he felt his head hurt. The smell of slat and the sound of waves. His wrists hurt. He took a deep breath and vomited.

           “Oh, finally! I thought you were dead!” Yoko Ogawa’s voice was like a harsh ringing in Dazai’s ears.

           “I would love to, trust me…” The brown haired man looked around him; he was still in the cage, but he could now move his body somewhat. Chuuya was in front of him, though he looked paler than before. His arms were tied up, but the metal gloves around his hands were no more. Probably from all the gravity pressure he and Yoko exerted. Chuuya’s head was resting against the metal bars and Dazai sucked in a breath.

           One of his eyes was blue and wide open, but dark somehow; looking dead. The other was still a white ball, the light reflecting on its shiny surface. There were tears of blood coming down on Chuuya’s cheek from his blue eye; from the other, something as tears but much more dense. Dazai wanted to reach and wiped them away, he wanted to so bad.

           His face, his body, every inch of skin Dazai could see was covered in those red stripes, like camellia petals. He felt like he would vomit again. They were a dark nuance of red, an ill light still coming to the surface from under them.

           Dazai had a lot of time to think in his dream (which he could not remember very clearly) One thing he knew, he and Chuuya came up with a plan to escape. Well, it was based on Dazai’s guesses about Yoko’s ability, but if what he thought was true, then his plan was flawless.

           Kind of. He hoped so.

           “How long have we slept for?” asked Dazai, but expecting to not be answered.

           “About three hours. “ Hm. It felt like a lot more time to Dazai. He wondered if Chuuya had the same dream… He shook his head. It was impossible.

           “Why didn’t you kill us while we were sleeping? It would have been easy.” He heard the sound of feet on sand and he looked down. Finally, he could see Yoko. The woman looked up at him, a malicious smile stretching on her purple lips. Kind of the worst combination possible with the orange light of the sun setting on her face.

           “Well, where would be the fun in that? You have to watch your friend die first.”

           Dazai scoffed. Did the people around him thought that he could not take it? That he was not strong enough to?

           Maybe they were right, but they would never know. Because Dazai never cried. There was always someone that would see him; he had to always be ready, he could never let his guard down. Even when he was alone, he was not. His fifteen year old self was laughing at him from the mirror, and his head was stuffed with voices that were not his own. Or maybe they were?

           And then there was Oda. Since he died, he followed Dazai like a blood ghost, guiding him, protecting him and making the voices from his head go away at times. Even now, he was standing in the cage, dripping blood from his wound.

           “Do you have a plan?” Dazai ignored Odasaku and responded to Yoko instead.

           “I already watched my friend die. Actually, no, I watched my friends die. There were more. I am the only one left as you can see. Chuuya is not my friend.”

           Yoko remained silent for some time and then pointed her index at Dazai.

           “You are just a kid; you know nothing about this kind of things, but you still think you do. You still think you are above the world. You think that…”

           She stopped mid-sentence and flicked her wrist. Dazai’s shackles tighten around his hands and he felt as if they were almost chopped off. Blood started to drip on the metal floor, mixing with the vomit from earlier. Drops of the strange mix trickled down onto the sand. Dazai held his screams in.

           “You think that you know how this world is! You know NOTHING!” Yoko twisted Dazai’s left wrist. He squeaked in pain and like that, with his eyes shut close, he did not see Chuuya slowly getting up. Neither did Yoko Ogawa.

           It was as if the woman had gone mad. Yes, she was crazy, there was not a single thing about her that could be described as sane, but what happened to her?

           Dazai didn’t know that, like him, Yoko Ogawa heard voices, he didn’t know that he was followed by her own ghosts dripping in blood that she spilled.

           “Kill them…”            “Yes, now…like you did to us…”

           “Murderer….! I hate you.”

           “Mama, don’t! Mama, mama, hahaha…”

           “Do it, darling, kill them, kill them, kill, kill, kill…”

           “Kill, kill…”

           “Mama!”

           Yoko ignored them and broke Dazai’s left hand. Tears rolled down her face. The voices of her family hit her like the waves hit the island. A storm was coming; the sky was getting grayer, darker and it was not long before rain started pouring. It hit the metal cage violently. Yoko’s makeup didn’t seem to be waterproof; her mascara was all over her face and she was still twisting Dazai’s arm, without mercy.

           The boy closed his eyes and bit his lips and did not make a sound. It was raining as that day.

           “Do you have a plan?” Odasaku would just not leave him alone.

           “I do, I do… Now quiet.”

           Suddenly the metal cage shuddered and Dazai opened his eyes only to see a red flash in all the grayness surrounding him. It was Chuuya, it had to be!            And yes, here he was indeed! It seemed that Yoko could not control two things at a time. Dazai’s guess was correct. His plan didn’t involve in getting his hand destroyed though, but it didn’t matter anymore. He was just glad that it worked out.

           He heard Chuuya grunt and he watched down to see his friend trying to reach at Yoko, a fight where both sides had gravity as their ally. Who would win?

           Chuuya looked up at Dazai. His eyes were not hollow; they were both blue and full of live and he smiled as he pushed harder and harder until Yoko was half buried in the wet sand. The sea was ragging.

           But, suddenly two women came running. They were behind Chuuya, so he didn’t saw them, but Dazai did. His shackles were now merely some pieces of chopped metal. And he still had one good arm. He quickly escaped from them and jumped off, holding his gun pointed at the women. They looked at him surprised and then at the cage, at Chuuya and at their boss and exchanged a look.

           They charged forward and Dazai shot them. He missed. He missed and the women could have killed him, but there was no need. They ran towards him but did not stop. One of them pulled out a blade and cut Dazai’s stomach. He collapsed and cursed his weakness. But, he did not cry.

           He caught a glimpse of Chuuya being thrown over and that was all. Then he fainted again.

***            “Well, you sure fainted very much in this story,” said Odasaku, looking at a half-wasted Dazai from across the table. He didn’t even try to stop him anymore. Chuuya would come to pick him up afterwards anyway.

           “Yeah~!I was ~hic~ dipressed.” Dazai’s head was spinning, but he wanted to finish the story. There was only a little bit to it…

           “You mean depressed?”

           “Yeah, what~hIc~ever now shut up and listen, Oda! This is a legendary story! I bet those kids of yours will love it!” Odasaku sighed and looked at the watch on his wrist. It was a little bit after midnight. He nodded towards Dazai as his friend started to narrate his love story again, interrupted only by his hiccups and the sound of a broken clock.

***

             Dazai woke up with a stinging pain flowing from his arm, exhausting his whole body. A seagull was picking at his hair and only for that reason did Dazai sprung up and made the bird fly away. His whole body was feeling hot; did he have a fever?

           He tried lifting his right arm, but it was too hard. He looked down at it and the sight of Chuuya’s fingers being intertwined with his made him recall everything that happened. He quickly checked Chuuya’s heartbeat; it was there, and Dazai let out a joyful breath. It was weak, but it was ok, everything was going to be ok…

           Dazai got up and put Chuuya’s arm over his shoulder. His left arm was completely ruined; it didn’t even hurt anymore, there was only a sense of numbness. It was going to be alright, repeated Dazai to himself, struggling to walk with Chuuya hanging on him

           He would go and leave the Port Mafia. Maybe Chuuya would want to come with him. Maybe they would go overseas and start their own business. Maybe something like an orphanage, maybe they would buy a house and they would stay there.

           Chuuya wouldn’t have to use his ability anymore. They would be normal, they would be good people, better than they are now. Yes, and maybe he and Chuuya could go watch the pink cherry flowers bloom, they could make snowmen in the winter, they could everything neither of them got a chance to as a kid.

           They could watch the moon on a windy autumn night, while the pie they had tried to cook for hours is burning in the oven they set wrong. The moonlight would illuminate Chuuya so beautifully, accentuating his blue eyes. And maybe Dazai could lean down and…

           “DIE! Die you filthy bastards, you motherfuckers, you gross me out! Die, die, die!!” Yoko Okawa’s voice startled Dazai as the woman came towards them. Her hair was a total mess, and her purple lipstick has been replaced by red stains of dried blood. Only now did Dazai see the other two women lying lifeless on the sand, face up, eyes open, their throats violently split by human hand.

           Dazai tried to go out of Yoko’s path but he felt an overwhelming force pinning him down. He looked at Chuuya who opened his eyes. They were not full of freedom; there was nothing else than pain and anger there. He didn’t know where his friend gathered all that energy to keep going.

           It was a mystery for him.

           Yoko approached, her legs trembling.

           “Die, die, die!” cried she as tears ran down her face, as her hand was gripping on a pointy rock as she was slipping on the blood the ghosts around her left behind them.

           “Mama, come to us…”

           “Don’t kill them, mama! We love you!”            “Darling, we are waiting. Come to us.”

           She stumbled and she fell face forward on the rock she was holding. Dazai winced; blood splashed on his clothes and he heard the woman murmur:

           “I am coming, my kids.”

           And then the island fell silent. Chuuya coughed and Dazai looked down to see the red sand before him. The redhead did not stop and only now did Dazai notice the wound on his torso. It seemed like a knife cut and even if Chuuya tried to suppress the hemorrhage, it was still bleeding pretty hard. His friend went numb in his arms again and the island disappeared right before Dazai could assure Chuuya it was ok.

***

           They were back in the club. The people around them seemed to not notice anything unusual about the two members of the Port Mafia.

           Dazai’s mind was finally starting to function. He needed a hospital for Chuuya, quickly or else it was possible for him to…

           No, he first had to get out of there. The music (who the FUCK plays such bad music, now let’s be serious!) was making his head hurt and the smell of piss and beer didn’t help either.

           He took a deep breath as soon as he was outside. His muscles were sore and his left arm started to awake. But, Chuuya was his priority. Dazai rummaged through Chuuya’s jacket and he pulled out the keys of the motorcycle (Jenna, that was what Chuuya named her) and smiled tired. He clicked the red button and he heard a ding-dong noise.

           He loved Jenna! It was on her way to Dazai and Chuuya. The brown haired thought; once he had Jenna, he would bring Chuuya to a hospital. What was the closest one? Hm…

           “Dazai…” Chuuya’s voice was hoarse as he spoke. “Dazai, please don’t leave me…” Dazai looked down at his friend surprised and chuckled. He brushed Chuuya’s hair out of his face.

           “But, you are a god and I am human. We can’t be together.” Dazai felt a stinging pain in his heart as soon as his words left his lips. It hurt him more that the pain in his arm, more than anything he ever experienced.

           “Then, from now on… you’re no longer human. So, just stay with me.” Dazai’s heart twisted in his chest and he nodded, even Chuuya could not see him.

           “Ok, Chuuya. I’ll stay with you forever.”

***

           “And this is how I got the name of my ability,” finished Dazai, smashing the empty bottle of whiskey on the counter. Odasaku nodded.

           “Hm, I guess it could have been worse.”

           “You, shut up! You old hag ~HIC~!!” Dazai covered his mouth. “HGG, I feel like throwing up…” Odasaku sighed and pated his friend on the shoulder.

           “Well, I should go.” Dazai sprung up and pointed accusatory at the man in front of him. The empty room smelled like Odasaku’s favorite whiskey.

           “You will leave me here? In this ~bleaghh…” Dazai had thrown up on Odasaku’s shoes and the man looked indignanted at the only one that was still keeping him alive. He smiled and he exited on the door.

           “Don’t worry, I’ll always be with you. And, don’t forget that there is someone else you are waiting for.” Dazai didn’t hear those words as he was already asleep.

***

           In the other part of the town, a phone rang. The man who owned it put his glass of wine down and answered.

           “Who is it?” The man listened closely to what the one who called him had to say. He nodded a few times and then said:

           “I understand. I’ll be there in a moment.”

           Chuuya went into his garage and pulled Jenna out and as he was thinking about what he was going to do, he smiled. That dumbass.

***

           The door of Lupin opened as the clock struck midnight again. It was definitely broken. Chuuya eyed his former partner, that was sleeping on the counter, his hair covering his closed eyes. Chuuya approached and he felt something slippery under his feet.

           Of course he had to walk straight in Dazai’s vomit. Of course there was no other way. The bartender appeared and greeted Chuuya, smiling at him. The redhead nodded.

           “Thank you for calling me. Do I have to pay for anything?”asked Chuuya, already drawing his wallet out of his jacket.

           “No, no, it’s ok.” Chuuya frowned at man and slammed 50 bucks on the table.

           “For dealing with this idiot for such a long time.” The bartender smiled and sighed.

           “I see you know how…peculiar this man can be.” Chuuya burst out in laughter as he drew Dazai’s arm over his shoulder and exited from the bar in the cold night.

           “I know better than anyone.” He walked with Dazai to Jenna and he tried to wake up the man. By slapping him hard on the face. It worked.

           “Ouch, what was…” Dazai’s face lighted when he saw who had come for him. “Chuuya! I’ve been waiting for you!” Chuuya rolled his eyes and raised his palm warningly.

           “Hop up right now or I’ll slap you again.” Dazai looked at his friend and he chuckled. He sat up on Jenna, almost falling once, but Chuuya put him back in place.

           “Chuuya~!”

           “What do you want, motherfucker?? Isn’t it enough that I came to pick you up, drunk, at such an hour!?”

           “Can I sleep at your place?”

           Chuuya hoped on his motorcycle and almost punched Dazai. He started Jenna and screamed over the sound of her motor:

           “You are crazy!”

           “I am!”

           Dazai smiled and nestled himself into Chuuya’s body. It smelled like peaches and wine. He closed his eyes and let himself fall back into sleep.

           “I’ve been waiting for you, Chuuya” murmured he as his eyes close one more time. Chuuya remained silent as they left Lupin far away behind them.

             Waiting for you sounds like a broken clock.

****

End Notes

And, yes, while they stayed in that white room (i leave it to you to decide what that was) dazai did tell chuuya that he was leaving the port mafia. and yes chuuya did punch him and he also told dazai that he cant come with him and refused to explain further. for that, he had to let dazai tickle him because i REFUSE to believe dazai left like that he cant he is better that this

i think? ok hope you liked it bye bye muah