#i dont want to do anything except lay in bed and listen to mbmbam
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i want to play acnh but the controller drift is unbearable and i dont have a spare $100 to buy new ones. also im depressed.
#i dont want to do anything except lay in bed and listen to mbmbam#god i literally just listen to mbmbam and taz on repeat. im so pathetic#ive been eating two meals a day for the most part. and i take a nap each afternoon#and i wake up like 3-5 times a night and i feel like shit when i wake up#my shoulders and back are permanently tense. so tense it hurt to massage them with light pressure.#my dad is supposedly only having 2 drinks a day instead of as many as he can drink#but im just waiting for him to start again and verbally abuse me over something insignificant like last time#i was just talking about something that happened earlier that day to my great aunt#and he interrupted and started yelling at me and gaslighting me and claiming that i was the one who said something earlier not someone else#and i just. im so scared. i live my life afraid of what hes going to do next. im afraid of him snapping and deciding that ive done soemthing#bad enough to 'deserve' being hit and im afraid hes foing to stab me with his fork or hit me with his metal cane w a spike on the end#hhhhhh im gonna cry i need to stop. god i wanna die 😔#glub glub
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