#i dont think im even explaining it properly here. bc i also like have a huge aversion to attention and like. when my friends are lookin at

[bangcakes]

messaged my friends last week like hey ik its been less than a week but i Need to see you guys i feel like a Lot has happened. but now its been a week and im like. Fuck. now i have to go through Everything and i dont remember it all JDJDXJZNNXMZ

[aspd-culture]

i been searching about ASPD and it seems i actually fit the criteria for it, but i am kinda confused, i dont know how to explain it but here are the symptoms i believe can have but i dont understand to be fully secure:

- "failure to conform social norms with respect to lawful behavior" i dont know if is something, but i do find social norms kinda meh and i dont fully understand it, i even believe that i can ignore a social norm because of this belief, but i dont get in trouble since i will find it more annoying to deal with it rather than "oh this is bad behavior"

- "deceitfullnes, repeated lying, conning others for own pleasure or personal profit" i dont wanna sound like an asshole really, but this happens to me, since before, i learned how to lie very well, i am often finding myself i lie so i can get what i want, but also i lie very much in general, and i believe is more about lying about myself so people can think i am a good person and get praised because of it, relating it more to NPD? is other PD i believe i had and in this case i fit almost all the criteria for it

- "Impulsivity and failure to plan ahead" This happens to me very often, but I don't understand, how is failure to plan ahead related to ASPD? like i mean, for me, i think is more related to how bad i am at organization, but also i am often doing very impulsive things, but i dont know i dont feel like in my case is related to ASPD

- "Irritabily and aggresiveness" this also happens to me, it was worse years before because i got into fights because of it, now i do still get irritable and there can be a point where i am aggressive but i don't get into fights anymore

- "Reckless disregard for safety of self and others" this one too, for me, i put myself in danger and i know is dangerous but i find myself doing it because of other reasons such as self harm and to get attention, but when is about the safety of others is often because i dont know, is not an excuse but seriously i dont know when i am pushing someone of their own safety, but also it can be in purpose but genuinely still don't understand the other person and my actions, maybe related to other things rather than ASPD

- "Lack of remorse, being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated or stolen from another" This one is something i always wanted to reject, but i just cant feel remorse of my own actions, when someone says i hurt them, often i dont understand their situation, is later when im like "oh fuck i did something bad" and i get guilty about it, but it disappears, maybe is again of possible NPD, for the lack of empathy and because when i hurt someone, i think more of how they will perceive me, dont want to rant about it but when it happens i tend to think more about myself and how others will never praise me again, i always try to think of the situation so i can feel bad about it but i really cant, and when i do is because i think about myself rather than others

So, is that, long text, if you dont wanna reply is fine, but i wanna understand better to properly know about ASPD, i relate a lot to pwASPD too. Something to note is that I am not an adult so it could be anything else.

So the first two sound very much like what the ASPD symptom is referring to there. As for the planning ahead one, that one relates to ASPD because, despite what media and such tries to say, one of the main pillars of ASPD is irresponsibility/poor planning/etc. The reason it doesn't sound like ASPD is just bc people harp on the violence and rule breaking symptoms bc they're scarier. Plus the prosocials don't like that they sound like assholes if they admit that we struggle with this disorder too - that it's worse for us than it is for them - and that we aren't some amazing masterminds who ruin lives and laugh. Most of the symptoms of ASPD can be entirely internal, in fact, and hurt no one else.

On top of this, with a disorder birthed from trauma as intense as ASPD is, you're likely not dealing with caregivers that taught you *how* to plan ahead - maybe just expected to do it without direction, maybe expected to learn by being punished when you failed, or maybe neglected so much that they didn't notice and/or care that you were failing to plan ahead. All of that can cause this problem. Kind of like the thing where people realize as adults that the reason they hate cleaning and can't seems to force themselves to do it regularly is because they were never actually taught how, planning ahead also is not an innate skill.

Lastly (outside of ADHD comorbidity which is very common), pwASPD live constantly in this state that the rug could be pulled from us at any second. Either that we may actually d*e from some perceived threat, or that we may have any plans we make taken from us. Instability in caregivers is one big thing that can cause ASPD, and that feeds into this. If you were constantly in a situation where any plan or routine you could rely on might be taken from you at any moment (or if you're just enduring so much abuse/other trauma that it's the only thing you know how to expect), then you won't leave survival mode long enough to make those plans so you never do.

In reference to disregard for the safety of others, not knowing when you're pushing people to/past their limits is very much part of what that means. Intentional or not, it's symptomatic of ASPD bc prosocials can usually tell when they're pushing ppl to those limits.

Everything I didn't comment on seems to also fit the criteria in my mind (of course going blindly off of your descriptions here) not warranting additional comment, and I didn't see a question to be answered in them.

Overall, yeah this sounds (in my completely non professional opinion bc I am not a professional and even if I was which I'm not I'm not *your* professional so I only know the snippet you've shared with me here) like it very much could be ASPD. While there is some very tricky overlap with NPD in ASPD, much of this sounds to me like it isn't heavily influenced by the NPD enough that I would say it's possible it's comorbid if you know you have NPD already. That's not something I can comment too heavily on as I'm not well researched into NPD.

Plain text below the cut:

So the first two sound very much like what the ASPD symptom is referring to there. As for the planning ahead one, that one relates to ASPD because, despite what media and such tries to say, one of the main pillars of ASPD is irresponsibility/poor planning/etc. The reason it doesn't sound like ASPD is just bc people harp on the violence and rule breaking symptoms bc they're scarier. Plus the prosocials don't like that they sound like assholes if they admit that we struggle with this disorder too - that it's worse for us than it is for them - and that we aren't some amazing masterminds who ruin lives and laugh. Most of the symptoms of ASPD can be entirely internal, in fact, and hurt no one else.

On top of this, with a disorder birthed from trauma as intense as ASPD is, you're likely not dealing with caregivers that taught you *how* to plan ahead - maybe just expected to do it without direction, maybe expected to learn by being punished when you failed, or maybe neglected so much that they didn't notice and/or care that you were failing to plan ahead. All of that can cause this problem. Kind of like the thing where people realize as adults that the reason they hate cleaning and can't seems to force themselves to do it regularly is because they were never actually taught how, planning ahead also is not an innate skill.

Lastly (outside of ADHD comorbidity which is very common), pwASPD live constantly in this state that the rug could be pulled from us at any second. Either that we may actually d*e from some perceived threat, or that we may have any plans we make taken from us. Instability in caregivers is one big thing that can cause ASPD, and that feeds into this. If you were constantly in a situation where any plan or routine you could rely on might be taken from you at any moment (or if you're just enduring so much abuse/other trauma that it's the only thing you know how to expect), then you won't leave survival mode long enough to make those plans so you never do.

In reference to disregard for the safety of others, not knowing when you're pushing people to/past their limits is very much part of what that means. Intentional or not, it's symptomatic of ASPD bc prosocials can usually tell when they're pushing ppl to those limits.

Everything I didn't comment on seems to also fit the criteria in my mind (of course going blindly off of your descriptions here) not warranting additional comment, and I didn't see a question to be answered in them.

Overall, yeah this sounds (in my completely non professional opinion bc I am not a professional and even if I was which I'm not I'm not *your* professional so I only know the snippet you've shared with me here) like it very much could be ASPD. While there is some very tricky overlap with NPD in ASPD, much of this sounds to me like it isn't heavily influenced by the NPD enough that I would say it's possible it's comorbid if you know you have NPD already. That's not something I can comment too heavily on as I'm not well researched into NPD.

[enden-k]

yall, pls no one be upset with me or misunderstand me. lately im just. unhappy with everything and having big issues and im not sure what it is or why.

friends/family and colleague (to my embarassment) noticed smth is off and asked, simply asked if im ok or need help and in both cases i started crying bc i was overwhelmed and confused w the question. idk whats with me rn its just that people. everything? just overwhelms me lately. i feel stressed by people. everything. i fall back into old habits to avoid or deal with stress. it got a bit better bc rn im having days off but i still feel so extremely stressed and overwhelmed when i open inbox here sometimes that it just makes me wanna cry for hours.

i dont wanna turn off messages bc at the same time im kind of battling w loneliness (it got too much) and i do enjoy babbling about some stuff which also helps me distract or lighten my mood. i just wanna ask you to kinda. behave? yourself a little? like. not to overwhelm me. to properly read things before asking me smth that was stated somewhere (eg eremite au). to not ask me the same questions in short time again and again and again (eg password question). to reign in some of your excitement or compliments. i am happy and love how you all enjoy things, really, but rn with my current state as soon as im blasted with all this i feel so overwhelmed and sometimes even panicked. i dont know what to say. i dont wanna come off as ungrateful. its so difficult to react. i dont. idk.

i have such a hard time to explain this or myself in general lately. its so hard for me to think and speak lately. idk whats wrong with me rn. idk why i feel like this or nothing and why im so extremely sensitive and overwhelmed in seconds. i just dont want anyone to misunderstand and think of me as an asshole bc im so weird or cold lately. usually im not like this. im really sorry if someone thought this. i just dont know whats going on w me and thats why im asking some of you to be a little. calmer? idk. with me. im sorry

[akgaereporter]

꩜ briizes: seunghan/wonbin/taro main dancer discourse 🤕

tldr: an ot7 account made a big thread on why seunghan is vital to riize's lineup, talents and visuals wise. they explain why his dancing is needed to balance the team but some taro/wonbin stans took it as shade towards their biases dance skills and ended up seeming lowkey ot6..

so everything started with this ot7 user posting a thread in korean about how seunghan is vital and unreplaceable within riize. they mentioned things like how his visuals and proportions blend the group properly, how he’s the mood maker and has good sense in variety and comedy contents, etc. very well written thread btw, here’s the link to read it if u havent already !

anyways, the issue started bc of the part where nomad talked about seunghan’s dance position within riize. they praised him for his flexible movements in contrast to shotaro and wonbin’s “rough street dancing and standard styles.” they also said that after watching the member’s fancams, seunghan is the member best at “using his upper body” and “highlighting the details of the choreography.”

here is the whole translated paragraph transcribed from the ss:

“Additionally, in order to widen the range of performance types that a group can handle, it is best if the specialized styles of each dance member do not overlap too much. While Shotaro and Wonbin's characteristics are rough street dancing and standard styles, respectively, Seunghan's style, in contrast, is very flexible and allows him to control the strength and weakness well. Also, by analyzing the members' fancams, we can conclude that the member in Rise who uses his upper body the best is Seunghan, and more importantly, Seunghan is the member who is the best at highlighting the details of the choreography among the members. In this way, the three dance line members are already the best combination, complementing each other's shortcomings, so if even one of them is missing, the quality of the performance will inevitably decline.”

this thread sparked a lot of seunghan praise:

now idk abt yall but after reading all these, the first thing on my mind isnt “ok but what about x member..”. this is clearly about seunghan, how he affects the performance/stage/vocal dynamic of the group, and what they lose without him. this is for seunghan and about seunghan, RELATIVE to the other members, not comparative. but some people clearly have other things in mind..

things got kinda messy from here🤕

and some people just straight up revealed they dgaf about him fr☠️

and youll never guess whats in shawty's bio..??

like hmm?? if 2+2 is 4.. how can you support an ot7 riize if you think he doesn't bring anything to the group? that hes not vital in anything? that they're doing fine w/o him? like im genuinely curious but anyways..

some people clocked how weird these reactions were but the damage has lwk already been done bc this is such a strange discourse to have at all🤕

☆ my opinion

again i just think its crazy how u can call urself ot7 when u dont believe he’s indispensable to the group? the whole point of nomad’s thread was to showcase what seunghan brought to riize, and why this ot6 body isn’t bringing out their full potential as vocal&performance artists. there are so many things to take into account here:

because one member is good at a certain aspect of a skill doesn’t make another members’ any less than..

the thread was to show seunghan’s unique differences from any other member, and highlight what the group loses by not having him. not to say “hes better at x than y member,” but to say “this is how seungan’s skill contrasts any other member and creates a better result.”

riize is a team, teams have members, members are going to have distinct styles that they execute best. shotaro is obviously the main dancer as he's very versatile and can cover a wide range of movement, but that doesn't change the fact there are details & aspects of seunghan’s dancing that he makes most noticeable, & that differ and contrast shotaro’s in a good way. those differences make them look better as a group. like yes taro is a pro dancer, but he has a more "x" style while seunghan accentuates more "y" movements, and "x" and "y" work together perfectly with the rest of the members on stage. its not about who is better, it’s about how they look together as one.

i feel like some taro/wonbin stans are referring to individual skills, which explains why they're bringing up taro's past as a dancer. individual skill is a whole different story, and again, that wasn't the purpose of the thread, it was to show what riize loses as a group by not having seunghan.

the “better at moving his upper body” part is one of those details seunghan highlights, but that comment is an opinion on nomad’s part, so ofc u can disagree with it. however the undeniable fact is that seunghan is very talented at dancing with his upper body, and whether x member is better than him or not isnt the point - it was included to show how he and only he executes it differently than others to create an enhanced look on stage. i think its funny how theres literally a part of the thread where wonbin is agreeing that seunghan has the most flexible upper body in an interview but some milkteas were still acting like nomad saying that is a snub to taro??😭

getting mad at a seunghan praise tweet for praising seunghan is odd behavior. u can of course have preferences, but to call it “discrediting” shotaro is a huge stretch. no one is downplaying shotaro’s skills as a dancer, in fact nomad’s thread is one of the only threads ive seen actually articulating and placing focus on seunghan’s dancing, so to say it was “objectively untrue” is crazy and i think we should just let hongjjangus have nice things. if u disagree, and think taro is better at something, gone ahead and make ur own thread like this user did (maybe with a less shady caption🤕) instead of creating a space for people to feel comfortable demeaning seunghan's skills comparatively to other members.

like who was speaking on him??😭😭 some people have definitely lost the plot but at least its a minority.. unrelated to these screenshots but theres srsly an epidemic of briizes who are lowkey moving ot6 but claiming its in the name of supporting riize's active members so be careful who u call oomf & stay strapped in these streets😕🙏🏽 seunghan WILL be home soon trust me ladies.. im psychic

[c l o s e t a b ?] ◀ ⇨ akgaepop.com

[moonlit-escape]

⋆⛧°. ⋆ Sasha Mystreet headcanons !!

i have a tummy ache rn from eating too much. anyway here's sasha i lobe her

half russian, half korean

demisexual (this is me projecting not just bc of her color palette i promise dont LOOK at me like that)

still pretty closed off, cold, and stoic. but, once in a blue moon, gene and zenix get her to genuinely laugh or mouth off and get angry and they absolutely relish in it

they're best friends :(

the only one of the three who can currently legally drive.

breakcore / hyperpop-punk Queen !! (crystal castles, quinn, swrslvt/cynthoni, laura les, snafu, charli xcx, xn88ax. yknow, shit i added to her playlist)

PIERCINGS!! honestly w all these headcanons, if they are/were a punk, they have piercings. she has double eyebrow piercings, a bellybutton piercing, and a tongue piercing

got deeper into and still practices witchcraft, just not potions or spells. she prefers her palm-reading, tarot, herbal mixtures and remedies, and crystal charges

im planning on making her patron saint someone from MCD that didn't get to mystreet, but first i have to actually Watch MCD.

loves scented candles and incense. she has pretty incense holders all around the house

favourite video game is luigi's mansion

always plays luigi during mario party and always loses. but it's fine bc she always wins mario kart (zenix is always princess peach and gene always plays one of the fuckin monster goons: dry bones, shy guy, goomba, one of the koopa kids)

had a crush on gene at one point, and they even tried out a relationship in uni, but then realized they were just doing the same exact things they did as friends and weren't really going anywhere, so they stayed besties

uses potion bottles as water bottles because they're just more practical

runs a vampire fanfic tumblr blog. she makes really fuckin good vampire au fanfics of really popular fandoms

has a butterfly knife and switchblade collection. they're all really pretty

zenix made her match phone charms with him, but he tells everyone she forced him (nobody believes him)

her and gene used to be skater buddies (zenix couldnt figure out how to skate for the life of him), but she's the only one who still skates around sometimes

i don't know how to explain this to anyone and it is honestly just my own delusion but oh my God did sasha have a mini crush on katelyn in high school

like it wasn't anything super. but she cannot lie to herself and say she didn't have fun during gym getting to see katelyn

typical "goth gf" reads classic literature and edgar allen poe poems and short stories. but also she has to work, so she listens to audiobooks

it's not that she doesn't feel her emotions or anything, but more-so she's just not used to expressing them, and doesn't know how to properly. and now, she feels like it's too late and would be too awkward to learn how

so, she expresses herself in other ways. like through her loud music, or her witchcraft, or through pen sketches and painting

she likes to go on walks every once in a while in completely random or strange places. yknow, ones where it feels like you shouldn't really be going. and sometimes she sketches whatever she finds there and thinks about

whenever she has a particularly.. excruciatingly stressful day, she likes to lay on the floor with her astral projector light, listen to music, and take an edible. it helps her calm down, and feel like she's in a different world for a while

it has backfired before though, because her mind went to the wrong place, and she ended up having a panic attack. so, she makes sure she only does it when both of the guys are home to check on her and ground her if she does start spiraling

Don't do drugs, kids. And if you REALLY have to try it because you're stupid, don't do it Stupidly. have a babysitter. a Trusted babysitter. and don't start with edibles. Be safe, or fuck up and die

[hypogryffin]

genuinely curious by what you mean by "jewish (factual)" in your tier list. i can assume for a couple what you mean (sophia as an example) but i dont see how the others could be like jewish-coded! interested in hearing your thoughts

link to the first post for claritys sake, but this is the tier in question:

ok so for clarification: i made the tier list a little while ago and then scheduled it for later to keep uploads consistent, something i usually do all the time but am not for this discussion for now. this means that by the day the tier list posted, i was already a few weeks or so divorced from the actual creation of it, so some of my opinions have changed (as i said in the og post, i was unsure on a good portion of the characters even when i first queued the list), and some of my reasonings behind placements have been lost to time and my silly little goldfish memory.

bc of this, as of now as im trying to find a distinct line between "jewish (factual)" and "jewish (based on vibes)", the criteria for "factual" is sort of murky. some placements in the category were serious, but a lot of them were also entirely for joking reasons, and i had moved on as soon as i was done laughing to myself without coming back to it.

all this is to say, i have no idea how to summarise it, so im going to explain everything i can remember about my thought process at the time so you can see where i was coming from.

SOPHIA:

yup 👍.

ok so for the uninformed, sophia is the name of a gnostic figure and the specifics change depending on the context of which ur referring to her in, but in judaism specifically sophia was given as a translated name for chokmah which is like a being thats like really important in kabbalah and considered like. this sort of i guess personification of divine wisdom?

anyways this is a concept that i doubt im anywhere near the first person to bring up, so im not gonna spend a lot of time on it like i will the things i havent heard other people talk about. like the whole "good friend of humanity" thing! judaism puts a lot of emphasis on kindness and care for other people and i think its important that thats so big for her character and for how jewish she can be read as. she is also jewish because i like her :^).

TATSUYA:

suffers endlessly because g-d hates *him*, specifically, and he hates g-d right back. jewish.

that was a joke. ok so right out the gate i think the whole "fighting hitler" aspect of IS should count for something during the discussion of which characters are jewish. like just putting that out there. anyways tatsuya is jewish because of eternal punishment. specifically, you know how hes like super into "atonement" and repentance? bro would really have benefited from going to a high holidays service lemme tell you. and he does it in a specific way thats like. his atonement is actively trying to repair what hes fixed right like hes not doing what hes doing to be redeemed, hes doing it because its his responsibility to fix whats been broken. i just idk how to explain it properly but thats a thought process your rabbi talks you through in jew school yknow?

also theres this thing called tikkun olam, which literally translates as "repairing the world". so it means more like. doing ur best as a citizen to improve community and country, or general social work. but just considering it as taking the literal translation, then its just like... yep. that sure is what hes doing isnt it

also, killed hitler. hashtag work

KATSUYA:

placed here mostly because being tatsuyas brother, theyd probably be at a similar "level" of religiosity. however there are some unique things i want to point out here;

katsuya like embodies the idea of "tzedek tzedek tirdof" like. its unfortunate hes a cop but for a cop hes a pretty good person? hes pretty uncompromising on right and wrong, and in a way that totally lines up w tzedek tzedek tirdof as its described in the torah.

extra emphasis on his compassion, as in theres like that core facet of judaism, the tikkun olam, where people have a moral obligation to help others; not just do good as oneself, but also stop other people from doing bad. that last bit doesnt really matter, cuz im bringing it up so i can talk about katsuya as a police officer to clear his dads name and try and ensure a better future for his brother. he gave up his dreams for them.

i mean, when i say "giving up his dreams", im kinda laughing to myself bc theres no way he ran it past his parents bc if he looked his jewish mother in the eye and said "i want to be a pastry chef" he would not make it out of the room alive. hed go "my dream is to become a pâtissier" and his mom would immediately be like "no its not its to be an accountant" and that would be the end of the discussion

also, i think he would make some of the best fucking challah in the world. hed make matzo ball soup that could make you jizz your pants just looking at it. look me in the eyes and tell me that he doesnt actually go nuts at rosh hashana when he gets to make the round challah with the raisins in it and stuff or whatever else. there is such a crystal clear vision in my mind of him rocking this apron my dad used to have that says "real men make latkes". it was pink and ugly as sin and i think it would be katsuyas most prized possession.

LABRYS:

her name is fucking labrys obviously shes a jewish lesbian. next.

/j i will actually talk about this. like not mentioning the only survivor of her upbringing, which isnt a one to one considering the death match portion of her backstory but still close enough to feel um. relavant to jewish culture. she acts very...stereotypically jewish?

its not entirely the accent, but it is...part of it. so like i know its like a new jersey accent and that the stereotype is new york, i guess? but im not american and i dont rlly know the difference. they look close enough to each other on a map tho so i think it counts

but also shes like kinda confrontational in a way i specifically associate with jewish people or jewish characters? like not really bitchy but argumentative right, shes got this really sarcastic or mocking sense of humour. and girl kvetches with the best of them.

(also, side note: since i made the original list, i found out that the voice actress for aegis in p3 reload, dawn m bennett, is actually jewish! if i were to remake the tier list, aegis would be moved up from "vibes" to "factual" because of this. mentioning that here because of the sister thing :).)

JOKER:

kills g-d which is the jewish dream. this is a another joke.

someone in the replies of the tier list said something abt a possible reason being that he has an "abrahamic figure" as his ult. persona, which could be a good point if satanael was actually an abrahamic figure! but it is not. like ok im not a history guy but satanael is a name used in the 2nd book of enoch, which arguably could be part of jewish "canon" (i know this is actually the term for it but fandom has rotted my brain and it sounds terminally online to use it in terms of real life religiosity) but most rabbis agree it like is not, and theyre kind of who im listening to on this, and quick google search says even in christianity, enoch is debatable? idk

so like satanael isnt in the torah. and if anyone says "oh its just like another name for satan so technically--" shut up i know. satan isnt real in the torah either. ok like "satan" is used as a term, but not as like the specific dude that like rules hell. hes just like at most a specific dude who is not a devil/cast from heaven or whatever, but instead is a lawyer. more often its a concept, something representative of like the urge to go against g-ds will or a kosher life, this "evil inclination" which everyone is born possessing and grapples with when trying to be a good person. NOT THE SAME AS THE CHRISTIAN SATAN. WHICH IS WHAT P5 WAS GOING FOR. SATAN IN JUDAISM IS NOT A "super demon lord" or whatever they call it in the text of the game

satanael isnt an abrahamic figure and i dont think satan is either cuz its so different between religions and honestly i think calling things abrahamic religions, at least w the context i hear of it, is like kind of a misnomer or just kind of generally misleading cuz judaism christianity and islam are all so different and if were talking about this i think whoever invented the term judeochristian should eat a sheet of glass for it because whenever i hear those terms its very clear the person saying it means just christianity but theyre trying to be inclusive without actually putting the work in and thats not the point of this.

ok if im honest, as i think abt it joker isnt like. really... super jewish, in a way that you can point out? its just like... this overall vibe im having trouble explaining which is probably also like super influenced by how much i like him. i want to say that this strict sense of right and wrong that remains uninfluenced by the rest of society is something that clearly creates or maybe just intensifies this like. empathy for other people that reminds me of this concept in judaism which i cant remember the hebrew name of rn but i think its most commonly translated to english as "lovingkindness", one word? or that the whole idea of the phantom thieves can be contributed to tikkun olam. but, on the other hand, even if lovingkindness is what i personally consider one of jokers core character traits, the other one is pure, blinding rage.

im not going to go super into it, because im a few years rusty of torah study bc its only really consistently done in my community for kids preparing for bnai mitzvah cuz of how few people we have in our congregation. but from what i remember, my interpretation of the exact limit between righteous and sinful anger is a bit more... lax than the average jew's, or at least the average rabbi's, meaning mine, lol. either way anger is almost always seen as sinful because its an emotion that can like. turn you from g-d, its the same thing that invokes that "evil inclination" we just talked abt. so, joker textually feels this rage that arsene, his other self, literally refers to as "sacrilegious", something that very clearly states that he is willing to *knowingly* commit sins for this rage and is perfectly capable of causing undue harm to others for it, which is exactly the reason why judaism warns of anger. this means jokers anger is distinctly against jewish teachings.

again, im really lax, my familys reform (/lh) and i think there are some parts of this characterisation that make me feel this rage is overall constructive, especially considering that is what feeds his constant practice of lovingkindness and tikkun olam, but it being such a huge facet of his personality (made worse bc as a silent protagonist, you really have to search to get away from this trait) brings him down on the Jew Scale(tm).

in short, now that im really discussing this id probably move him to incredibly jewish based on vibes or even to just "jewish" no further classification. but even w the undying sinful anger thing i cant not think of him as jewish and i dont think its just bc hes one of my favourite characters of all time.

also that hair texture looking really familiar is all🤔🤔. all im saying that is in the tutorial, instead of "frizzy hair", morgana deffo should have been calling them blondie and jewfro /j /j /j

EDIT AND JOKERS KITCHEN!! JOKERS KITCHEN!! FOOD AS A LOVE LANGUAGE!! IN P5 YOU MAKE FOOD FOR YOUR FRIENDS AND YOU PUT LOVE INTO IT

MORGANA:

i know i put morgana before joker in the tier but i think in order to rlly discuss morgana we needed joker first bc part of my reason for putting them in the same tier is because they really are a pair, do not separate.

anyways, morgana does have a lot of the same problems as joker when it comes to being difficult to pin down. his inclination to tikkun olam is similar, sort of even greater than jokers depending on personal characterisation of joker, but instead of this discrepancy of his jewishness being anger, the ethical conundrum with morgana is sort of. arrogance? like, i have trouble figuring out how to really put into words how i feel abt morganas "lovingkindness", because it is so hard to understand where hes at in terms of empathy?? like. fucking. idk hes definitely a very caring person but its not exactly like

ok i cant figure out how to say it moving on. i used the word arrogance even though i dont really think thats right, because morgana has never seemed haughty. his "arrogance" is really just him making up for an inferiority complex caused by the amnesia thing, its not as if he genuinely totally believes himself to be above the others. but like no matter what it stems from, the way he behaves and his personal pride hurts people. ie the okumura arc, or his entire relationship w ryuuji. he speaks ill of others, belittles them to bring himself up, etc. arrogance and excess pride is as condemned as anger in judaism if not moreso, since its even less useful/constructive to be "arrogant" than it is to be angry. OH ok so what i meant with the hard to figure out his empathy thing is this actually!! hes very caring and has a really notable respect for human life but its always at war with his need to prove himself, so even if when you think about it its like Oh Morgana Is A Really Caring Person, which makes sense because he was created from human desire and as such is really in touch with what people need, the desperation he has to be seen as "worthy" comes off as wanting to be seen as "above", even if it means trying to get the people around him as being considered "below" him.

tldr so if it was just those two traits i think id have to move morgana lower on the list, alongside joker.

HOWEVER. speaking directly to the other jews in the crowd, but morgana is totally textually a golem, right? like not exactly, obviously, but think about it. morganas a being of the velvet room because he was created from "the dregs of human hope" (canonical line from yaldaboath that i think about more than what can be considered healthy tbh), whose job is was and always will be to protect and guide the trickster and his community, the phantom thieves. hes a golem right? am i insane? am i seeing things? i dont care, im not giving up on this interpretation, so morgana is factually and canonically jewish cuz of it.

ZEN:

i do not remember.

as of today id probably move him to either jewish no other classification or not jewish. my b guys. anyways

JUN:

life is indescribable torment, and then hes also got additional, mostly unrelated, mommy issues. judaism 101.

also his suspenders when he was a kid are the most young jewish lad shit in the history of ever like i have seen that exact outfit on a young boy every time i go to temple, and each time it is a different kid

ok more seriously, i really do think juns story-- specifically his relationship with memory-- can easily be extracted into a jewish narrative. like nyarlathotep messed with his memories and convinced him that the other members of the masked circle killed maya right. and so the way he fanatically reminded himself of the past was a mix of trauma and active manipulation. but if i think abt it a certain way i also can see it as like. ok so in judaism memory is really important and like a lot of the time during for example passover, youre meant to refer to yourself as being a jew in egypt, saying "we" instead of "them" and such. but im specifically meaning how important memory/remembrance is in grieving. jun in his grief for mayas perceived death "kept her alive" in a way. she was never forgotten, and so she never died. even though the entire masked circle forgot, from trauma or fear or guilt or whatever, jun held on, remembering her, and so she survived. joker took peoples dreams but his actions also caused them to be completely be forgotten. they were alive, but they were robbed of their ability to be remembered at all, and so they were as good as dead even still breathing and talking.

retroactively, this idea enforces tatsuyas jewishness, considering the entire story of eternal punishment. he refused to forget the masked circle, even though it hurts.

anyways back to jun, i also think the whole repentance thing is important too. he hurt people in his anger and sorrow and spends the rest of his life (until the world is reset at least lol) atoning for his wrongdoings.

also, i know i said kid him is super jewish looking, but he has not gotten better as hes grown up. 17y.o him is exactly the guy your bubbe will pull up on facebook and be like "this is the grandson of my friend or whoever! you should go on a date with him, hes your age! he looks a bit gay but hes a very successful doctor! ...and hes JEWISH YAKNOW...." and ur like "ok bubbe"

ERIKO:

i actually do not recall exactly why she is in this tier specifically. the only thing i for sure remember was that i at least partially placed her here bc of her fascination with the occult.

HIKARI:

ok this one was kinda me goofing. its the whole extended family thing like whats more jewish than being actively discouraged from a creative career for something "safe" and "normal?" bro the aunt might as well have dropped the "being a doctor is very respectable" line in the song.

but like even without that, wanting to be a director or associated with film? hitting her with the jew beam. mazel tov babygirl.

[fruitybashir]

for the fanfic game: C I P S

C: What member do you identify with most?

i said its a tie between jan and kris and explained jan first so now here's kris:

when kris said waiting for jan is stressful i felt that In My Soul. i would rather die than be late, if im not minimum 5 mins early im already getting a stress headache. i plan things through start to finish, if you go on vacation with me anywhere you dont need to do anything except stay by my side the whole time and ill get us where we need to be, when we need to be. i always have all my travel connections as a physical note, as a phone note, and as a google doc. im going on vacation in october and i already had a finished map since december including hiking trails, tourist spots to visit, options for both good and bad weather, and restaurants with affordable and good vegetarian food. kris go on vacation with me you would be so happy. <this is funny bc the person im going with is also named kris

i have terrible fashion sense but somehow other people can find me great outfits from my own wardrobe, i often make awkward and/or cringe jokes in conversations everyone just politely laughs at, i too would accidentally let band secrets slip or call bojans parents "just regular people", i have been told many times that people are afraid to approach me in public bc i have "a resting face like youd tear my throat out if i even just look at you" and i got that exact resting face from kris when i passed him and damon on the street in oslo. terrifying. absolutely terrifying. unapproachable king.

we both look too femme to be using he/him pronouns

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

already answered this twice and i honestly cant think of another thing 😗

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an “architect” or a “gardener”? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story unfold as you go?)

architect. for sure. as mentioned and demonstrated before, i write everything down in bullet points first and then start properly with the actual writing. i need to have everything planned out in detail before i can start

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

friends with benefits, fake dating, miscommunication where both pine for each other and think the other doesnt love them but theyre just both stupid, goddddd i cant get enough of that shit

[kiwibirb1]

More meetup au stuff because my brain keeps making the sashas extra angsty-

Basic general thing here but the party (which is what I'm calling the entire group think d&d) grows in the order I come up with the aus. Like in the beginning it was just canon and CiH, then BT joined, and so on. (I'm trying to think up some sort of plot but for now it's just an excuse to make them interact.) So the ToaF girls are the most recent additions. Also ages so from oldest to youngest we got BT (34 ish), canon (23ish), ToaF (19-18), WV (16ish), CiH (14ish), and CF (13ish). CiH is only older bc they spent a little longer in Hyrule than canon did in Amphibia (and by extension CF).

Okay now that the housekeeping is out of the way time to make WV!Sasha sad heh (ugh still stuck on their nicknames. Sasha will prob be Vagabond but i dont know what to do for anne and marcy...). So even though he's not the oldest, he kinda became the groups navigator bc he had traveled the most. He like calls put shit that's ahead, but it's always really gruff and pretty much all the speaking he does. Rest of the group just assumes he's shy or something, but he sure don't act it. And his Marcy and Anne are constantly mentioning conversations they had the previous night, despite no one hearing a single word from any of them. Anyway Heron and Domino are practicing their sign one day (everyone in amphibia knows it, most especially the lower classes. Since accidents are so much more common with frogs and toads and Idk other reasons im tryna worldbuild here okay) and Vagabond walks by them and waves. But Heron realizes that the reason she thought Vagabond always waved a little funny is bc it's not actually a wave its hello in sign! (they're like slightly different okay?) Heron tests her theory by signing something to Vagabond and he automatically signs back. So then Heron, Domino, and Vagabond are holding an entire conversation in sign and both the BTs are realizing "holy shit this kid is the exact opposite of shy" so one of them asks why they don't talk more and Vagabond awkwardly explains how he prefers signing but figured the rest of the group didn't know it. So yeah. Vagabond was also like really happy when ToaF joined because ToaF!Sasha was also fluent (WV!Marcy wasn't completely, or at least as fluent as Sasha, same with BT) so he could hold conversations with extra words and shit.

Hmmm oh! All the Sasha's with an eye scar have slightly different ones. WV's is two slash marks right over her eye, going towards her nose, that have nice clean edges because Rosie helped make sure it healed properly. ToaF has two slash marks as well, but they go away from her nose, and are much more jagged bc no Rosie to help. BT has one long thin one going from her hairline to that one spot at the edge of your jaw. Knife wound hehe

[pumpkinsy0]

idk how to describe this post, but just describing characters psyche lol

darry,dally, and tim- they have little to no genuine support system and have to harbor everything they go through pretty much alone and bottle shit up cause growing up quickly sucks

tim- his parents werent rlly parents, so he had to emotionally mature fast and understand what they did wrong in life and in having kids so that he could better take care of angela and curly, he learns quickly that looking out for ur own blood can save ur skin more than yknow it, his parents arent around rlly anymore and he doesnt exactly know where they run off to even if they come back home for a few days but he knows theyll never learn that

angela- she canonically had a break down about her life being actual dogshit and bryon says that in the morning she’ll go back to her own stone cold strong self cause thats just the way she is, that's just the way she's learned to go through life

literally every singular one of the characters LMAOOO- its self explanatory HOWEVER i will highlight darry here

curly- faces a shit ton of oppression (even if u dont agree w him being queer hes still black to me but if u dont see him as black hes still a poc and a greaser) so hes just learned to do whatever he wants bc no matter what he does hes always gonna b judged so y not live life to the fullest and in a way that makes him happy, he’ll still be shunned, but at least he’ll be happy

tim- i cant properly find the words to explain it, but someone needs to check up on this nigga fr, a good portion of the neighborhood is religious, especially the older ppl yet they always judge him for one thing and another, nobody is rlly genuinely hoping (or in this case praying) he gets better

curly- shameless reminder that i ship purly, so I thought about curly saying this to pony for a sec cause i think cures that type guy to just explore the world any way he wants and he'll do anything to get someone to join him in on it

this is also for very obvious reason two bit, soda and if u squint, steve

darry- he cares for pony sm it comes off to pony that he doesnt care at all, pony needs his space to breathe and darry doesnt wanna let em go

the shepards but most particularly angela- for some reason she held her parents in a high light cause unlike some kids in the neighborhood they had them both, curly and tim knew this wasn't rlly the case very quickly and as angela grew up, bit by bit she knew what they meant and would lay or even cry in bed over it

TAKE AWAY THAT THESE R COUSINS PLS ONLY PAY ATTENTION TO THE WORDS THATS WHAT IM TRYNNA HIGHLIGHT HERE IM BEGGING U

purly- either way u chose who's who the other has always felt like they weighted other ppl down (for ponys case) or like theyre just to far gone to be helped (for curlys case), they still love each others company because they see the other as being worth it/deserving of it

however if u dont ship purly or can't get over em being cousins this is literally darry and pony or johnny and pony for like the same exact reason

[plasmasimagination]

Hi! I hope You’re doing well and I wanted to ask who you’d match me with from HSR, preferably the guys because ahhahdjsbdks my pfp, but ignore jingy rn I want your true and honest opinion. (I don’t mind a female suggestion either)

I’m going to really try and keep this short (I feel like I will fail this as I literally over-explain everything—) but don’t feel pressured at all to reply to this or anything! (I kinda feel i alr did this but im forgetful too help-)

A quick summary:

I’m afab, like 160cm(5’2? With chest which I hate because I want the dark academia dressing style (i dont have money)), she/they, libra, INFP, I’m sorry, I haven’t really had the hyperfixation on sun moon and rising and well astrology stuff tbh 😭

My personality (a mess im so sorry):

Well, I don’t think I could tell you. What I know of myself is that I try to be honest, I am loyal to my friends and probably obsessive when someone shows me interest and i dont know- (there’s some mental disorders going around, along a suspicion of autism) Personally I see myself as a shy annoying brat, while in reality I don’t ever initiate conversation and never know what to say unless it’s about a hyperfixation or something—AGAIN I OVEREXPLAIN EVERYTHING. My mouth doesn’t work as well as I’d like to, I cry too much (imo) I’m sensitive to well a lot, I get overstimulated quickly depending on the situation and um well I’m a picky eater I guess.

RAHHH I LOVE FOOD. And I’m chubby. I’m VERY self conscious and messy (which I’m sure you’ve noticed if you got this far)

Fun fact! If i were to live alone (still living with parents because house market is hell) I’d probably forget to eat a lot/overeat even more than I already do. Why? Because I don’t feel it. I don’t feel a limit to my ‘hunger’ and I don’t even really think I feel hungry at times.

Also, I hate to be perceived by people. It makes me feel like… too much alive. I don’t really feel a connection between my mind and my body, like someone sees my body and I’m just: THAT AINT ME YALL PLEASE IT AINT MEEEEE 😭😭😭😭 but id never say that bc again, my mouth doesn’t work.

I think I’m pretty useless at a lot too, but I don’t mean for this to be a traumadump thingy, which I also don’t realise when I should stop or not like RIGHT NOW I SHOULD PROBABLY STOP (the doubt is real, I’m so sorry—)

LAST THING!

I’m a Jing Yuan simp, obviously, name and all, but I also firmly believe we wouldn’t be good together? Like he’d be great for me. But what would I bring to him? Besides messy thoughts and nothing?… Which is literally nothing. I want to be someone he could properly rely on and not just a hopeless random girlypop who stops processing information after something becomes a bit too much mentally.

I have my serious moments, which will for most part go unnoticed online, but it’s not like I’m inherently useful or whatever. I feel like I’m really lacking in lots of aspects, and yes I’m aware I’m not ‘old’ yet, but my thoughts eat me alive and I won’t be surprised if I well blablah me me me I hate talking about me. Nothing bad even happened I’m just weird at this point, apologies! (Im a mess, my mind is still that 12 year old kid who just wanted a good hug from her mom and a good chat with her mom without all the school and later college problems aghh I wanna be 5 again.)

ANYWAYS if you made it this far, kudos to your determination anddd i hope you stay hydrated! And eat well. Health before anything.

I FAILED TO KEEP IT SHORT. Sorry I- AAAA that’s how my brain is.

Good god jingsnuggler you're Litteraly the best request I've had in my inbox- (IM SORRY MY OTHER CUTIEPIES DONT GET JEALOUS)

And I also was scrolling from like bottom to top to write some request and saw your pfp and was like "wait didn't I just recently get another one of them?" And I was right >:} You really did stay in my memory HSHSHS anyways anyways not tryna chit chat too long since we know why you're here, and I'll use both of your submits to give you the perfect match...

Drumrolls please....

🥁🥁🥁

.

.

.

JING YUAN!

WAIT ! LISTEN IM NOT BIASED.

I genuinely with all of my heart think that you guys would be perfect like no joke

He would balance you out, just fine.

He's a gentle soul, and would find you very amusing and enjoy being around you

Your talkative and bubbly nature would soothe his soul and calm him even.

Sensitive personality? Don't worry Jing yuan will pat your head and tell you it's fine

Forget to eat? Jing yuan will take note of it. And make sure you never forget. Ever

Okay enough of fluff you said you don't think you have anything to offer for him while I strongly disagree

I think Jing yuan needs someone who can keep him entertained, someone that can talk to him, he's a lonely man believe it or not, he doesn't really interact much with plp other than Yanqing, and between you and me Yanqing is boring af

So he'll greatly appreciate having a small birdie on his shoulder that will tell him all that they think , after hours of doing general work all he would need is to have someone talk to him about some casual stuff and random thoughts, yk?

I also think he would turn to you in case of a crisis, sometimes just come home to you and lay down to cuddle with you, it comforts him somewhat, youre like his stress reliever, hes usually very reserved and calm with other people, but with you..it's so different

To him you're like a fresh breath of air, like just a slap to the face to wake him up, you keep him from going freaking insane

I don't think Jing yuan is usually fit for people with a personality of like blade or Dan Heng (just an example of personality I am no shipper nor anti shipper don't shoot me)

Like ...yeah I guess they can be friends but like...Jing yuan wouldn't click with them? I don't know how to explain it but jing yuan needs someone lively and like all over the place, so he can take time to slowly organize you and your thoughts in his mind.

Phew that's all from me, sending lots of hugs and loves I hope to see you around on my blog since you're a small blessing on my acc (≧◡≦) ♡

[bl00dh0rs3]

I really need a name for this au. Anyway i nailed down their color schemes (flats and some character design-y thoughts notes below)

Aw man im really about to go in on this here, ok--ill stick to just design stuff and a bit of Their Deal^tm for now! ill explain the au in full some other day, with a more polished drawing.

Alright so. I am still doing research, its ongoing, but i think ive decided that, in this au, their relationship is something more akin to... in a past life they were the same, but for spiritual development reasons, the qi that made That person split, and went on to reincarnate as Them--narratively this is going to make them function like. Just normal Foils lmao--just with an added umph of it being somewhat literal for them, in the scope of their world, if that makes sense! I dont want to put myself in the box of calling them brothers, bc it just irritates me, but they are Not going to be romantically involved in this au either--SWK has enough trouble in his weirdly uneventful but still tumultuous love life as it is (👀 at Erlang and ZBJ), im not going to torment him by adding his evil clone to that list LMAO. Also LEMH aromantic as hell bc i said so.

Also their both trans thats very super important. Trans monkeys forever obviously

Anyway, So theyre still sort of "the same person", yet not, as they had still Never properly met (until Liu'er chapter)--their both incredibly similar and incredibly different, due to the imbalance of the energies within them and the actions they took for the majority of their lives. SWK is the yang, extroverted and bold and destructive and take-no-shit, while LEMH is the yin, (at least in this story) by being reclusive and a bit of a pushover for the longest time--the, erm.... Outburst, being the result of built up resentment and imbalance within himself spurning him to overcompensate for what he was lacking. It's kind of complicated and intricate and i like it that way if describing it is kind of rough Pfft--but anyway!

Point is, i wanted ALLLL that to be reflected in their designs by giving them plenty of Contrasting but Complimentary, and even sometimes juxtaposed details! The incorrect yin yang belt buckles/brooches are the most obvious one i think, next to the general warm vs. cold color palettes--then there's Liu'er being shirtless and with shorter hair, just to bring a sense of masculinity into his appearance, counterbalancing the fact that he's otherwise very feminine and in line with his Yin nature. Id say i made SWK's hair longer for the same kind of reason, but given that long hair isnt seen as inherently feminine, mileage can vary on that--if one reads it that way then yay, fun detail, and if not, then you still get to be looking as a SWK with long hair, and thats always a win in and of itself.

The red parts of their face are also matching--SWK's making up the over eye and LEMH's the under eye, to visually indicate the "this is the same person split in two" dealio. I also tried to make SWK appear a bit more Rounded and Soft, curving his cheek tuffs and little beard In a bit more (belying a gentler nature and other. Yknow, Round thoughts underneath his theatricality (contrasting with his yang-ish behavior), while LEMH's is sharp and feathered out (bringing to mind hostility and action and other Sharp thoughts, equally in contrast with his usually yin-ish nature).

They were initially going to both have the fillets on their heads, for reasons Like the ones above, but without a shirt Liu'er torso was feeling empty and i felt like he needed something to break up the grey of his fur--so, necklace. Hes bouta get choked tf out dont worry about it ❤

Uhhh thats all i can think of writing down right now, feel free to let me know if any of it is kind of Eh, constructive criticism and all that--if you saw any typos no you didnt, thank you for coming to my ted talk and have a groovy day

[gammagoop]

my recent fixation has been the wings of fire book series since ive been rereading it, which i feel is not very related to any of my other interests and so i havent posted much about it. but i literally have “post whatever i want” in my bio so i’m not going to let the whims of an audience stop me any longer

all that to say heres some of my series opinions in the form of tierlists

(not including 3rd arc bc i havent gotten there on my reread and i dont remember it very well)

character tierlist! (added the legends: darkstalker characters manually since they weren’t in the tiermaker version)

notes:

mightyclaws is my background character fave. category 10 glup shitto event

i need to do a long post on how much i love whiteout. another day

i realy like clay in the first book and if he retained the same level of depth throughout the series he would be in the top tier-- its just that his writing makes him so shallow in the rest of the books it makes me so sad :[ i was listening (audiobook) to hidden kingdom and like. 90% of his lines/actions were about food and the other 10% were about protecting the other dragonets..... i related so much to his anxiety in the first book and his empathy and his ability to see both sides of things... gah. sad.

jambu is also one of my glup shittos. i love his whimsical ass

foeslayer is a hard one for me because she never did anything wrong she's just..... not as present as i wish she was. she's treated as a very vital character with how many large plot points hinge on her, but she doesnt have much agency herself. its stated a lot that she's extremely important to darkstalker but in the legends book we dont see much of them interacting? idk. i like her but she always feels so uninvolved

the 'beat you to death (funny)' tier is just for characters who i like on some level but are also pathetic and worms. out of that tier i like deathbringer the best and mastermind the worst

tier after that are for characters who i have a positive opinion on but not really a strong one. anemone and sora are more complicated, but i do generally like them. i really just feel bad for them if anything. i think i like clearsight more than the other characters in this tier, but she's not in the 'wonderful :D' tier because i dont think she has a very strong personality

the 'conflicting feelings' tier is kind of a trainwreck because it means a lot of things

obviously riptide is the outlier since he hasnt done anything nearly to the degrees of coral, glacier, and albatross-- but i do have conflicting feelings on him. riptide is completely inoffensive, hasn't done anything wrong, i just dont like him because he has no real reason to be in the story. like you could write him out very easily. his only purpose is to be a love interest for tsunami which is like...... gh. dude. she doesnt need one. if she's gonna have a romance it should come naturally. not "wow this seawing is handsome and also he's the first one ive properly met as well as a guy do im in love with him now" like girl do better

coral and glacier both have done bad things and obviously have bad intentions but also.... theyre not the worst. bad but not the worst.

albatross is a victim of emotional abuse and even though that doesnt justify his actions it does explain how they could have been negated

next 3 tiers are self-explanatory. i forgot to put her on there but queen vigilance goes in 'the grime beneath my shoe'

actually no i wanna talk about scarlet and battlewinner: i think the thing that i like about them is their theatrics. they bot have such a huge presence, like a disney villain. whenever i read scarlet dialogue it almost feels poorly written with how over-the-top she is but. no other character talks like that. its just how scarlet is. and i think thats so good. whereas battlewinner's situation conceptually is just cool as hell. i love how she struggles to speak because of the ice in her throat, her rage, the way she's hinted at but her reveal is completely unexpected...... very very good

no one likes morrowseer

when im in an emotional abuse and classism competition and my opponent is queen lagoon 😧

ship tierlist! (made on ms paint since i couldnt find any good ones on tiermaker. turned out to be nice since i can mess with the placement more)

notes:

top tier is /j i just dont really like how tui writes romance

i was kind of against glorybringer at first for the same reason i dont like tsunami/riptide but honestly it grew on me. their dynamic is so fun

anemome/tamarin is good i just think tamarin could do better if she wanted to. but i understand the "i can fix her" mentality and i do genuinely think tamarin could help anemone

sunny/fatespeaker is kind of a funny concept but also i can totally see it

i genuinely forgot turtlejou was a thing in canon ... it does not make sense to me. who came up with this. in the words of my friend "forced heterosexual on both parts tbh"

i love turtle and peril as friends so so so much if i saw someone romantically shipping them i feel like i could get mad

smolder/thorn is like if glorybringer was bad. mostly just because thorn can do way better than him. smolder and vermilion should kiss each other and bond over being wimp princes who havent actually done anything wrong themselves but bow to tyrant relatives to avoid getting killed

i dont know if this will be an unpopular take but clay and peril is such an awful ship. i like them as friends, i think theyre great as friends, but a romantic relationship between them would be so deeply unhealthy considering their situation. peril would be even more dependent and attached to him than she already is, and clay is not the kind of dragon who has an easy time saying 'no' to things. it would not be a malicious relationship in any way, but it would not be good for them. peril needs to learn how to live for herself, not for the approval of anyone else

okay thats all for today friends. thank you if you read all of my mismatched thoughts if you did ^_^ i love talking

[devondespresso]

1, 25, 81, 94 for the fanfic ask game! <3

KOKO HELLOOOOOOO ad thank you so much for the ask 💕💗💖💞💝 i went a little wild and had to reign it back in a bit and its still pretty long so apologies in advance

(ask game we're talking about is here but i also have questions next to the answers)

1. do you know how you want the story to end when you start, or are you just stumbling through the figurative wilderness hoping to find a road?

for the vast majorty of my fics i think i have a pretty good idea of where its going to go, i think because i get the ideas of these cool scenes usually set in act 2 or 3 or i at least the vibe i want from the start and The Point is usually clear the second i put thought into it. currently the only exceptions are 1) this super secret (woooo~~~) ficlet im working on that came from a prompt so i had to spend like 3 or 4 days writing it to properly understand the direction i wanted to take it, and 2) the steve henderson au, which is fucking massive already and it's even bigger in my head stnzgns. that one you obviously know how it ends y'know, it aint the steve henderson au if steve doesnt become a Henderson, but for all the arcs i have along the way it took a while to properly figure out what i doing and how to do that and im just now figuring out what that looks like for the first major arc.

so tldr: usually i know, sometimes i gotta figure it out, but i do need to have it figured out before it can really take shape

25. what’s your revision or rewriting process like?

oof ok so i tried writing this and good fucking god explaining everything i do in editing took up so much space. so this is the short answer for convenience but if anyone wants a long answer im foaming at the mouth to talk about writing stjsnystn (the rest under the cut)

the majority of my process is editing and sometimes first drafts are literally unrecognizable from the final. a lot of how i edit line by line is intuitive/vibes based, and whole scenes/arcs/pacing/flow/theme etc etc is based on a really deconstructed thought process for storytelling, to put it as briefly as i can (because this is one of the parts that got really long) its about The Why of everything going into the story. Picking details or making decisions not based rigidly on formula or trends but instead whats best for the kind of story you want to tell (and then making sure to implement it in a way that actually does that in the story).

for small works i prefer to just change shit as i see it and not worry about doing focused passes through the work, but in the steve Henderson au i literally cannot its too fucking big smhdmyxyn so in that case i do passes that span like whole writing sessions just hyperfocused on this one thing. one of my favorite passes is in-character passes where i pick one person (often dustin bc hes a main character), rewatch them a ton to get in their headspace, and go back and make sure everything they say or do fits them as if they were the sole focus if the story. I'll also do passes to focus just on medical accuracy, passes for a specific character duos to keep their story progressing and consistent, passes for ideas that stay between the lines making sure they stay consistent and understanding how much information im conveying, character's specific mindsets that their arc is about and making sure they dont have any unintentional exceptions, literally if its a thing in the text i probably need to do a pass for it so i know its consistent

also more lighthearted stuff tends to need wayyyy less editing time and its a more balanced half solo half beta process. the easiest was the claudia henderson drabble because it was really just a backstory with an active scene or two all rooted in her outside persective.

also sometimes i just start from scratch halfway through, like mr crayola henderson has one previous half-complete version in my doc fhdlas tho i guess thats how drafts are supposed to work

and this is the tldr im sorry i dont want to cut it down any more just read this one its my favourite fdhaskl

81. if you could go back in time and give your younger self a piece of writing advice specific to you, what would it be?

honestly i wouldn't have much to tell them. i didn't start writing fanfic until july of last year?? something like that and i started with the steve henderson au. maybe don't write that one about the triggering thing lol.

actually wait no. id tell them its okay to abandon projects (and maybe tell them not to make some purchases dgnxngsyn) but ye i spent a while mourning projects because they felt like they ceased to exist, but i had several screenplay outlines that probably helped me a ton. in my writing and those experiences never leave me so their existence still had a purpose and value

tldr: dont write your very recent triggers silly goose, dont cry over abandoned art

94. do you prefer dialogue or description?

i definitely prefer dialogue, and with it action descriptions because i still think in movie-medium (tho i am getting better at understanding how the FUCK prose works and especially prose pacing oh my god why can't i just hold on an actors face for several seconds of silence gAAH!!). i like saying things without saying them, i like subtly building towards something body language until a snap, i looooove making blocking relevant in a medium where you're not even seeing the movement with your eyes, and i love getting into a characters head so far that each person has a different way to word something or a different detail they focus on or a certain tick that tells the other character whats in their head.

but i struggle with internal monologue sooooooo hard, its a practiced skill im actively working on to write a characters internal logic about something but still keeping it from being too on the nose about whats really going on. like i can do it but i struggle to fill page time with it because exploring ideas at least for me usually leads to the source and thats decidedly not where the characters going! its a tuesday afternoon! they're not unpacking shit they're trying to have a third coffee!! i also struggle finding the best words for the reader to feel the text, like idk man maybe im using the onelook dictionary wrong but it just does not get me what im looking for in under three looks zgnshnsyn

tldr: dialogue and blocking, good description is witchcraft

_

but yee thank you again for the ask dude!! this was so much fucking fun i fucking love talking about writing and the logic process behind everything. thanks anyone seeing this for actually reading this far 💕

[t4tdanvis]

Dante selfcest rant 👀 👀

-@gendervoid-zane

im going to shove a couple (read: many) posts ive previously made about this here and then rant about it MORE bc im MENTALL ILL!!!!!

now AHEM

u see this could work with mcd dante ending up in the mys universe OR mys dante ending up in the mcd universe - or even they go back and forth between both!! either way could be very interesting and silly

with mcd dante ending up in the mys universe, it would be very funny to watch him try to figure out what the Fuck is going on bc mf has no idea what a phone or a computer is and is just so fucking confused. at first mys dante is more focused on going "hey wanna play video games!!!" to stop and process that mcd dante doesnt even know what a video game is. and then seeing mcd dantes confusion at Literally Everything he decides to sit down and try to explain things (unfortunately mys dante is Dumb - fortunately mcd dante is equally Dumb so mys dante going "this is a phone... it does... stuff.... you can call people!! idk how they made it able to do that tho dont ask me :D" is good enough for him)

on the other hand, with mys dante ending up in the mcd universe, itd be even Crazier because mys dante (who is used to having the internet and a car and big cities etc) is now stuck in the medieval era. thankfully mcd dante is here to help!! except he does a horrible job of helping bc he just goes "well im sure he'll figure everything out!" and then hands mys dante a sword - and is shocked when he ends up getting injured. mys dante doesnt mind because running around and throwing himself into danger is fun (especially when he gets to do that with a "friend" (read: boyfriend who he hasnt figured out hes dating yet))!! mys dante is also Struggling because adhd meds dont exist yet and his brain is completely fried and he can barely function until zoey figures out how to make potions thatll help. which leads to mys dante bouncing off the walls and mcd dante having to practically drag him to bed every night to get him to go to sleep, until mys dante Finally is able to function properly again

and, of course, the inherent romantic comedy of "i cant be in love with this other version of myself nope nope nope- oh god the other version of me is hot". the first time they kissed they stared at each other for a solid five minutes before mcd dante went "so uh.... yeah....." and mys dante just went "that was like... kissing myself. haha"

they are both Dumb and do not know how to function correctly around each other. they are mischievous silly little guys who cant stop getting into trouble and getting injured and doing stupid shit (but its ok bc their friends somehow keep them from getting themselves killed). and also they definitely tried to make out in a tree but ended up falling out of it and getting hurt. and at one point they tried to make out underwater and somehow didnt realize how stupid of an idea thatd be until they almost drowned. theyre gay and silly and dumb ur honor

this post was uhhhh way longer than id expected but thats ok ty for listening to me rant sorry it took a bit to type all this LOL

[acti-veg]

Hello Acti-veg! Im a big fan of ur blog. Ik ur no Vegan prophet/guru or anything, but i could really use another vegan to talk to. I'm vegan and also I have been trying to live as low waste a lifestyle as possible. Growing my own food included. My mom, despite my best efforts, refuses to go vegan. In fact she is a staunch Anti-vegan. Her doctor told her to go plant-based, her health is failing bc of her diet, and refused to change. But she's a stubborn until proven wrong type.

She made a huge fuss about how useless growing our own food was, but through ignoring her and making an effort, and successfully harvesting, I convinced her that growing food was a good idea, and have slowIy started including more vegetables and water into her diet. She expressed interest in backyard hen keeping. I always wanted to adopt rescue chickens, I could give them a good life, spay them so they dont have to be egg machines, and the manure/ free roaming habits for eating bugs could help around the garden and give them enrichment, and I briefly considered the option. But I know that Veganism is about harm reduction, condemning, and reducing the reliance on animal exploitation as far as possible of Human and Non-human animals.

I thought that by eating yard eggs as opposed to grocery store eggs I could explain the conditions of factory farm animals, and then teach her about the impact it causes on animals even locally, and then spay the hens properly. But it still feels shitty on the end of the hens..

I feel like by trying to get my mom to slowly transition to veganism full stop, I would be making non-vegan decisions along the way, but if I do nothing, I would have wasted the opportunity to make another activist and save more animals in the longterm, i was wondering what ur thoughts on it may be? Or anyone in the comments

I can totally appreciate the dilemma here, but honestly I think you may be taking on the responsibility of her choices a little too much. I could be wrong, but it sounds like you're taking her failure to reduce her harm as a personal failure, and therefore determining that it's up to you to directly change her behaviour.

I think that is probably how you have arrived at this dilemma - you are wanting to reduce her harm to the extent that you're willing to put yourself through something you'd not only find uncomfortable, but would actively go against your own ethics. You can advocate, you can provide opportunities for her to do better, but it's really not up to you to provide her with less harmful animal products.

Besides, I think it's an assumption that her having backyard hens would be more likely to lead her to veganism - in my experience, welfarism is not on the same continuum as abolitionism, one doesn't lead to the other. She will still think of animals as essentially there to provide things for her benefit, she will just also think they should be treated well while doing so, which she probably already believes.

I share that impulse to try to help those around you see the truth you have arrived at, and to some extent that is our duty as vegans and activists. However, you can't take on the burden of their choices as your own, and you shouldn't compromise your own principles to lessen someone else's harm.

Personally I'd take a third option - tell her you'd like backyard hens too, you think it'd be great to save some battery hens, but you'll be looking after their health by preventing them from laying, because that is the responsible thing to do given the health impact. You coul still educate her if she chooses to go down this route. See where she lands on that, but either way, I really don't think it's on you to try to make the animal products she consumes more ethical - that way you really would be making her choices your own.

If you'd like to chat this through more with another vegan then please feel free to message me - my inbox is always open.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

Hey, I know you're a Projmoon fan, I guess I'm curious because I'm at an impasse on what to do rn, did you play through the entirety of Lobotomy Corporation, did you just skip it entirely for Ruina, or did you read a summary/watch a cutscene compilation or let's play/something else? And what would you recommend as an approach? I've tried playing through Lobcorp but it's just extremely tedious and I'm considering skipping it to get to something I think I'll like more (Ruina)

oh!! ok my answer is a little bit complicated tbh; bc i havent. played any of the series at all. WAHAHA

what i personally did was um. attempt to watch an incomplete lobcorp lp ==> couple months radio silence ==> watched one (1) day of gameplay from a friend (for one boss fight specifically) ==> got recc'd summaries i slowly watched thru ==> couple months radio silence. ==> watched someone else's (actually complete) lp ==> (rabbit hole'd) summaries again.

um. dont do that. JSNBGKHDBK

im not gonna act like i Know how t tackle a series like this (since it took me like 4 circles around to Actually Commit to it (and also im kind of. new. here)) BUT from my personal opinion of the series and how it carries itself, i CAN recc at least Some order of something.

TRY to play Lobcorp! which i can kinda see is already done on your end. its something i Super want to try but absolutely know i wont finish SKJFNKDJF;; the main draw of PLAYING lobcorp is the struggle. it Sucks! its Long and Tedious and the game HATES you... and that's the point! it's plot relevant. it's an experience i didnt get to feel, but can so painfully just Understand by merit of watching someone else do it, only skipping about occasionally. tl;dr: the game loop is Telling A Story, Dragging You In-- THAT is the draw in insisting folks play it. it genuinely makes the... everything... hit that much harder. Once youve given it your best, dont feel ashamed to look for someone who's Done It! (i hear a lot of folks havent completed lobcorp themselves, so ✌) DONT UM . SKIP IT COMPLETELY THOUGH ruina is literally a Direct Sequel to it. i think it does a good enough job at introducing the setting on its own, but i am GRABBING YOU this shit will hit fucking DIFFERENT if you Understand. also its a lovely game worth looking at and appreciating bc GOD what a fucking experience those last few days are. i do not cry that easily to stuff like this but OUGH. AUGH. H

Wonderlab??? its a webcomic thats heavily reccommended you read through, but due to um. circumstances . it doesnt seem t be feasible atm. however, there IS a synopsis up thats pretty darn good! wonderlab, iirc, isn't directly plot relevant, but DOES introduce certain important concepts for ruina. however, it's not Mandatory, as ruina Also explains these things. as far as i know, its just a fun lil kickass story in the universe taking place between series you can look at if you want :)

Play Ruina! or watch, i guess. again, i watched an lp and it kicked the shit out of me emotionally (affectionate) so honestly do what you will here, i suppose.

honestly though, these are both super fucking long-ass and ridiculously heavy games so you're probably gonna be here a while. it took me like two weeks of committed watch time t look into Properly, and that was even when i started skipping straight to cutscenes at the latter half. embrace that! i cant stop you, but id heavily reccommend at the very least watching through the gameplay loop for a good chunk of the time-- giving the story that space really hammers home the... Everything. heavily heavily recc letting it Have that space.

for ruina specifically though, definitely at least watch through the beginning and ending legs of every fight-- and at least a solid chunk of every boss fight. if you're intent on skipping round gameplay loops like i did, imean. watch the boss fights watch the boss fights these fuckers do NOT play around. i cannot applaud these games' soundtracks enough and i wont say anything but trust me trust me trust me.

ANYWAY. here's the stuff that was recc'd to me, personally! if you wanna give watching through the series a go! :]

Lobcorp LP: [x] (Commentated+Completed! I couldn't find any no-commentary ones that were finished, but honestly for its gameplay loop it Helps. Blind on his end, but he does genuinely really like the series so i give it a thumbs up ✌) Ruina LP: [x] (Same guy :] also completed!) Lobcorp SUMMARY: [x] (Brief, but a good opener+summary!) Wonderlab SUMMARY: [x] (It Sure Is Wonderlab!!) Ruina SUMMARY: [x] [x] (Actually incomplete, but goes pretty well in depth and is easy to watch+absorb.) Alt SUMMARY: [x] (Consists of both parts of the duology! I haven't actually watched it in a while so i don't exactly remember much t say about it, but it sure is on my list!)