#i dont think i can take any days off from here or else an Event Occurs
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wait aminute what's going on with this fuckass site
#is something happening .#incubus.txt#i dont think i can take any days off from here or else an Event Occurs
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OP men and being “told”they are in love with you:
Ft. Law, Kid, Zoro
Cw: implied fem reader (mainly in zoro’s part)
Ngl, not much of a fan of this so i might make a follow up! lmk if i should!
Part 2
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Law:
Oh boy.
This man doesnt realize it until one of his crew members tell him. He’ll give you small smiles when youre not looking. Completely mesmerized at you: Your focus, your dedication, your delicateness with every task performed. But most importantly: your smarts. Every-time you spoke, he would stop what he was doing and listen intently at whatever subject it was. Which was how the crew…mainly ikkaku, Shachi, and Penguin, knew there was a special interest.
“Am I in love with y/n? I dont see how thats any of your business”
Law says, looking at an accusatory Ikkaku.
“Captain. I can see that look on your face. You’re all red.”
“No im not.”
“Oh yes you a-“
“Room”
~
After that, It really got him thinking. Why did he get all flustered? No. There is no way he was in love. It was just a coincidence that he happened to get all worked up around you. That his heart would beat a little faster. That he was willing to drop whatever he was doing to help/listen or be with you. That he spoke more softer and less stern too. That was all a coincidence….right?
~
“Captain? Who’s that tiny person you’re drawing on your sticky note? Are you distracted by something? Is that… y/n?”
“Don’t any of you know how to knock?!”
A blue bubble surrounds the submarine.
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
Kid:
Same as Law.
He doesn’t realize his behavior till a teasing Killer points it out.
“I didn’t take you to be such a romantic, Kid.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
His soft tone of voice in comparison of his rough one. The way he yelled at everyone except you. The way his brows furrowed every time he saw you talking to someone else. The way he locked himself in his workshop and didn’t let anyone in when he saw you enjoying yourself with another crew member that wasn’t him. Killer was the one who found him and he could see right through Kid.
What was this feeling? Why was he more angry?
“You were staring at them that whole time. You’re jealous huh?” Killer asks, Kid could sense the grin from under his mask.
“Jealous? For fucks sake. No”
Killer shakes his head with a laugh and mutters “Whatever you say” before leaving the room.
Kid scoffs. Killer didn’t know anything. This is how he always acted….right? I mean you were beautiful… but that didn’t affect him right? You shouldn’t be all smiley and happy with anyone besides him.. thats just a friendly way of thinking right?
“Eustass? Killer sent me in here cause he said you needed my help with something?” You walk in all shy and innocently. You didn’t know about the little trick Killer was pulling on Kid.
Kid turns soft when he sees you and becomes a blushing and stuttering mess for how caught off-guard he was from your sudden appearance. This, as everything else, enrages him.
And who else is to blame for this?
“KILLER IM GOING TO KILL YOU!”
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Zoro:
He knows what he feels. He just doesn’t want to believe or pursue his own feelings.
Every-time he sees you, his heart beats faster. But this wasn’t the same fast heart rate he got when he was training. Nope. It was every time you were in his presence. Every brush of skin. Every-time he saw you fight. Every time you assisted him in anything.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t have time for romance.”
“Ah! So you’re not even denying it!You’ve never told Sanji off when it came to him flirting with us, but now you suddenly do?”
Nami says, pointing at herself and Robin next to her, referring to the event that led for the crew figuring out he was in love with you. Sanji was serving ice cold drinks he made for the hot summer day and as usual…he got flirty. But once Sanji got to you, his heart eyes and kneeling position in front of you as if you were accepting his hand in marriage. Zoro’s eyebrows furrowed and he stood up from where he was napping.
“Leave them alone Sanji. Can you not be a creep for one day?!”.
Although Sanji would’ve made a snarky remark back. He didn’t. Sanji looked stunned? He looked back at Nami and Robin from where they sat at and Nami shrugged, while Robin gave a knowing smile.
~
“You two don’t know crap. I don’t have time for this”
Suddenly, you walk in..
You look at Robin and Nami who were hovering over Zoro cleaning his swords on the bench. Although you were confused, you shrugged it off.
“Oh hey…” you say… “Zoro, wanna train?”
Zoro looks away and starts to stutter.
“Oh uhm…s-sure…”
Nami and Robin smirk at him, which is met with a death glare.
“Im slicing all of you.”
#one piece#trafalgar law#eustass kid#eustasscaptainkid#one piece eustass#one piece zoro#roronoa zoro#trafalgardwaterlaw#zoro x reader#law x reader#eustass x reader
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“Notice me” “Beg for it" (LN4)
Summary: After what feels like centuries of back and forth flirting, Lando and his Mclaren teammate have tired people out with their inaction to do something about their very obvious crushes. Aka the 5 times they confused fans with their interactions + the one time they made everything clear (SMAU)
Part of my summer event! Warnings: Zak Brown, Reader sort of takes Oscar’s place? Also the timeline on this is weird sorry
mclaren
liked by georgerussell63, landonorris, and others
mclaren Proud to announce our official driver lineup for the next season as yourusername joins the McLaren family🧡! Can’t wait to see her and Lando in action next season👊🎊
username1 oh I am about to be unbearable once we get more content with these two
username2 i have no one i can tell about this
mclaren guess how we felt having to keep it a secret!
zbrownceo welcome to the family yourusername!
yourusername happy to be here!!!
yourusername Thank god the news is finally out, you all don’t know how hard it was to not scream it from the rooftops once I signed my contract
landonorris Wouldn’t want anyone else as a teammate 👊
yourusername I would
landonorris wasn’t what you were saying earlier
landonorris “oh Lando, what a dream come true to drive alongside you, I’ll be such a good teammate you’ll forget all about Carlos-whats-his-face and the other old guy”
danielricciardo why am I catching strays?
yourusername you’re saying I haven’t made a pretty good impression? Maybe I should have stayed at Alpine…
landonorris definitely not saying that, please don't leave
username3 the vibe between these two is off-
yourusername
liked by landonorris, mclaren, and others
yourusername P3! My highest yet 👊! What a blast this year has been so far and we have still got a couple races to go! While I could talk about how thrilled I am with my first podium in F1, it wouldn’t be right to not mention my teammate’s spectacular race, earning him his first F1 win. So happy I could be on the podium right next to you, Lando, to celebrate your first (of many) wins! 🎉
username1 they sure do put every other duo to shame with how much they support each other
username2 Lando’s win was amazing but my god I would rather talk about her overtakes
landonorris always the best supporter 👊
f1gossip
liked by 15,158 others
f1gossip Spotted: landonorris and yourusername seem to be spending quite a lot of time together on their summer break! While most teammates like to take this time to get away from the people they work with every day, these two seem to do the opposite, getting quite comfy with each other while on a eurotrip together.
username1 they can’t do this to me oh my god
username2 completely unprofessional in my opinion! They are coworkers they should not be vacationing together, especially since they are wearing revealing outfits at the beach. Disgusting how much this sport has changed
username3 you will live i swear its not that big a deal
username4 usually id argue against getting into drivers' business but it does seem inappropriate to be going to the beach and having dinner alone with your teammate…
username5 dont know who i am more jealous of tbh
username6 im sorry do you people not want them to get along?
yourusername
liked by zbrownceo, carlossainz, and others
yourusername team meetings and court (mclaren) ordered teammate bonding
username1 lando norris make it less obvious how in love with your teammate you are challenge (impossible)
zbrownceo I don’t think we ordered any bonding, you guys are close enough already. Maybe I will file a restraining order between you two so you guys stop distracting one another?
landonorris sorry boss 😞
yourusername boo you are no fun old man
zbrownceo want to rethink that last comment yourusername?
yourusername we promise we won’t distract each other as much, Mr. ZakBrownCEO
landonorris notice me
yourusername beg for it
carlossainz you both may be happy now but just wait until he replaces you with a fancy new teammate and forgets all about you
yourusername stop being a diva
landonorris
liked by 53,836 others
landonorris Going into today I wasn't expecting the technical failure that would cause us to have to retire the car. Because it wasn’t an easy day for me by any means, id much rather take the time to congratulate my favorite person on her first Formula 1 win. Seeing you grow from your rookie season till now has been such a wonderful thing to witness. Its even better to be by your side while you do it. No one is more deserving of this win. Congrats on your first (of many) wins :)
username1 he is so in love i am sick
username2 who do they think they are fooling
usernamer3 so sorry to see you dnf 😢but glad to see you are in bright spirits
yourusername Lando 😭 such an incredible day and an even better celebration afterwords. Thanks for being by my side all this time, I couldn’t have done it without you
landonorris we both know damn well you would be just as successful, maybe even more considering how much of a distraction I am for you 😉
yourusername the only thing distracting about you is your stupid face and annoying personality
landonorris I guess you are just spewing out a bunch of lies today huh?
username4 they are already hot rich drivers why do they get to be in love too?
username5 fr leave some happiness for the rest of us
yourusername
liked by 97,839 others
yourusername yes, we know you all knew this but let us have this moment please
username1 oh my god what a shock 🙄
username2 how will we ever get over this news🙄
username3 how could they have deceived us for so long
username4 nah i can’t even pretend like this is breaking news.
yourusername I knew it was a rumor but I wasn’t expecting everyone to know 😀
landonorris I always thought we were kind of discreet about it…
username5 are you kidding? It would be less obvious if you guys held up signs that said “we are in love”
#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#lando norris x reader#lando x reader#lando norris imagine#f1 x reader
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wanna know whats so perfectly and endlessly exciting about fantasies? i can have them anywhere about anyone af any time.
i can be at work, in an important meeting with the ceo on a project, keeping professional and on topic while my mind wanders to how his old hands would feel fondling my breasts and sliding inappropriately up my inner thigh until his fingertips brush against the soft damp cotton of my panties, how his breath would feel on my cheek as he whispers that he only hired me because he wanted to stare at my tits all day, how his heavy body would feel keeping me pressed down over his desk while he slowly fills me with his thick cock...
i could be in a shop buying groceries and feel a chill go down my spine as i wonder how it would feel for a random man to press up behind me, grope my ass and my tits from behind, breathe against my neck that i should stay quiet and make this easy for him as his hand lifts my skirt, pulls my panties aside and shoves two fingers inside my cunt, fingerfucking me against the shelves until im tight and gushing and shaking as my wetness slides down my thighs, until i gasp as i cum, and he disappears as i buckle and slowly sink to my knees to catch my breath...
i can be at a pride event with all my lesbian friends, flipping off passing men and holding the hands of other women around me, as my thoughts flood with tingling accuracy at images of those same men getting fed up of my callous arrogance, charging the parade, grabbing me and my lesbian friends by our hair, throwing us to the ground and showing us what it really feels like to have the priviledge of society behind you.... shoving our legs apart and slamming into our obviously still virgin gold star cunts with their hard throbbing cocks, ignoring our screams in protest just like everyone else at the parade ignores us, laughing and fucking our wombs hard and deep as everyone who was once celebrating our lesbian pride is now cheering for the men raping us into the concrete street, our tits (and "unintentionally wet" pussies) on full display for these men to stuff and cum into over and over, taking advantage of our prideful lack of clothing to give us exactly what we were asking for...
i could be walking down my street just for some air and feel my body tremble with the anticipation of a random stranger running up behind me, tackling me to the curb and fucking me hard and fast because he just had to use me, needed to get off and i was the most available cunt for him to stuff...
i could be in a session with my therapist to work through my daddy issues and trauma, trying not to grind into the couch im sitting on as i picture him moving to sit beside me, whisper that he's here to help me overcome the difficult thoughts im dealing with, telling me as his fingers gently rub my nipples over my shirt that my trauma is the only reason i 'think' im a lesbian, promising as his other hand gently parts my thighs to rub my pussy and clit over my jeans that he can fix me and make me a good girl again, whispering as he kisses my neck to lay back, relax, dont think about it too much until eventually hes ontop of me, panting and moaning into my ear as he gets off, softly and slowly raping me for the first time of many...
and i can do this all day, without anyone ever knowing any better. these are just a small handful of all the ones i have 🤭🥴
#love daisy lo#lgetsd#dykebreaking#dyke correction#orientation play#cnc k!nk#mis0gyny kink#r@pe fantasy#patriarchy kink#serve the patriarchy#men are superior#fake lesbian#fake dyke#r@pe k!nk#c0ckslut#c0ckwh0re#lesbian conversion#cr3ampie#lesbian correction#dyke breaking#dyke conversion
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even my phone misses your call, by the way
Summary: Elle knows perfectly well that it's a bad idea and that she'll probably regret it when she sobers up, but she still picks up her phone and dials the number of the one she misses the most - you.
Pairing: Elle Greenaway x fem!reader
Warnings: Mentions of a slightly graphic event that happened to the reader, allusions to smut, a few y/n's, no happy ending (for now?)
Author's note: It's day 3 of me watching season 2 after Elle left and it's safe to say that I'm still incredibly wounded, so what better way to project my feelings onto everyone else than writing this! :D For a girl who hates reading angst I sure do love writing it, so buckle up. I'm dedicating this to @bbbbadoobee i hope u like it pls dont hate me
Word count: 4,4k+
Elle knows she shouldn't. She left the BAU for a reason, and it's late. She glances at the clock on the wall, wincing as the time reads close to 3am. But as she sits in her bleak living room, her third bottle of vodka sitting unfinished on the table right next to her phone, she doesn't care about making good decisions. She's lonely. Desperate.
Leaving didn't make her feel any better. She's been lonely for years. She found a home within the BAU, and she doesn't think she'll ever be able to get over it. Get over her team, that at one point became her family.
She's drunk, and she's tired. She should go to bed. Instead, she picks up her phone, and calls you. She misses your voice the most.
It's been years. She doubts you'll answer. She listens to how her phone calls once, then twice, and on the third time when you pick up, she relaxes. "Y/n...it- it's me."
"...Elle?" You ask groggily, sitting up on your bed and trying to rub the sleep away from your eyes with the back of your hand. Wait, what? Elle? You voice your thought.
"Wait, what? Elle? Elle Greenaway?"
Her heart immediately lurches towards you at the sound of your sleep-ridden voice. She can see you so clearly in her minds eye, how you're sitting on your bed, the strap of your sleep top falling off your shoulder, how the freckles painted on your skin form constellations, the same ones she used to trace with her lips.
"Surprise, I guess." Elle responds, her tone a bit off in attempt to seem casual. Her heart is racing right now, but her voice remains steady. "Did I wake you?"
You stay silent for a beat. You don't notice it at first, but the hand you just used to pull the blanket tighter around you and now is resting on your lap is shaking. You can feel your throat constricting and your eyes beginning to sting, both from the lack of sleep and the emotions you're feeling.
"Yeah, yeah you did, but it's fine. Is- is everything okay? I didn't know you still had my number."
Her heart sinks, hearing how off you sound. Your voice quivers a bit, and she can only imagine your face right now, probably pinched and hurt.
"Of course I do." Elle says, and her voice softens a bit. Maybe she shouldn't have called. What was she thinking would happen?
"I just..." She struggles to articulate her thoughts as she rubs a hand over her face. "I needed to hear your voice."
"I, um, I miss you, Elle. We miss you, back at the BAU," You whisper, looking up at the pale ceiling of your room, taking a deep breath to force the tears down. "How are you?"
Your question feels like a punch to the gut, and for a moment, she can't speak. Because how is she actually doing?
"Oh, I..." She hesitates, and swallows the lump in her throat. "I'm...I'm fine." After a few moments, she adds sheepishly, "And I, I miss you guys too..I miss you a lot."
"Did you continue with some sort of federal work at your new um, home?" You ask as casually as possible, the word home leaving a bitter taste in your mouth, because her home should be here, with you, not wherever she is right now.
She's glad you're not prodding her for more information, asking more questions that would be too difficult for her to answer. But she does cringe a bit.
"...No." She finally replies, and her voice is more than a bit embarrassed. "I went...in a different direction."
"That's, that's good, actually. I hoped that you wouldn't. Thought that it would be better for you to leave this life behind, get a chance to heal."
A moment of silence follows that. You don't know what else to say, so you're twisting a strand of your hair around your finger as you wait. But you've always been curious, always digging a little too deep and as you're speaking to her for the first time in years, you can't help but ask.
"Are you happy, Elle?" Was you leaving us worth it?
She listens as you speak, and her heart hurts because when you say it like that, it sounds like you know what's best for her. She thinks for a moment you might tell her to come back, to heal with all of you.
But you ask her if she's happy instead.
And her heart hurts even more because it's the most difficult question you could've asked her.
"Define happy." She says, finally.
From those two words alone you know that she isn't, not fully at least. The perks of being a profiler, you suppose.
"Can you sleep without waking up in cold sweat? Have you managed to stop reaching for a gun that isn't there? Have you stopped being hypervigilant when walking on the street?"
She swallows thickly once you ask her those questions. And the fact that she can't answer any of them with a yes makes her temples ache.
"I..." Her voice trails off, and she shakes her head as if you can see it. "I don't...no. No, not really." She finally says with a sigh. "I can't sleep, I still reach for a gun, and I'm paranoid as ever that someone is after me."
You rest your forehead against your knees that you've tucked under your chest and you bite your lip hard enough to draw blood to keep your tears at bay. All that pain, and and suffering and everything that she's gone through still haunts her, as if her leaving this life behind hasn't had any impact at all.
"I haven't seen you in so long. Did you grow your hair out? Or did you keep the bangs and the bob?"
"The bangs and the bob." She says, and she winces as she realizes how much she actually misses you. If she concentrates hard enough, she can almost feel the ghost of your hands playing with her hair. "I have a few more grays now, though. I'm a real old lady."
You can't help but let out laugh at that, but it comes out wet. You cringe at that. An average person might've missed it but you know that she heard and you know that she has put it together that you're crying. You cringe even more.
"I'm not the youngest anymore either, Greenaway. Sporting a few greys myself under these luscious curls. Thankfully it's not too visible."
You're right - the wetness in your laugh doesn't go unnoticed. Her eyes immediately tear up as well, and she swallows against the lump of guilt in her throat, because she knows she's the reason you're crying right now.
"Yeah, well, you're too pretty to go grey anyway." She's teases right back, but her words are also laced in bittersweetness.
"Always the charmer, huh?" You bite your lip in a smile, feeling giddy for a moment. "Is there, um, anyone special for you nowadays? Are you tied down?"
"No one special, no tied down." She says quickly, maybe too quickly for it to be casual. After a few moments of silence, she adds, hesitantly, "Is there someone special for you right now?"
You shake your head, because how could there ever be someone who isn't her in my bed and in my heart, but then you remember she can't see you so you somehow manage to utter a soft "No."
"There isn't. There hasn't been one, really, ever since you left. You're always in the back of my mind." Your voice quietens as you say the last part.
She can feel her heart start racing when you respond, her body tensing up. She can't believe what she's hearing. There's no one special in your bed, no one in your heart...not even in these last YEARS since she left?
There's this strange, overwhelming sensation that rises up in her. One part of her wants to be angry that you've wasted away waiting for her. But the other part of her, the part that has her heart racing can't help but feel happy. Hopeful.
You keep talking, not giving her a chance to say something in between. "I know what you're gonna say. I can imagine your face and your expression so clearly. You're mad that I've wasted years waiting for you, even though I knew that the chances of me ever seeing you again were close to none. But I just couldn't help it. You can't blame me for that."
She actually laughs aloud at that, because you know her so damn well. She's frustrated, because of course, you've guessed right. She doesn't want you to have waited for her, especially in vain.
She never intended to see any of you again, especially you. And of course, you couldn't help it, because that's who you are. Loyal to a fault.
"You're right, I'm pretty damn frustrated right now." She responds, and her tone is more fond than angry.
"How can you expect me to move on after what we had, Elle? After those nights in the jet? After the nights curled together under the sheets? After we've taken bullets for each other, after I've stitched you up with my bare hands and bailed you out of jail? After that night we spent together right before you left the next morning, leaving me to wake up to an empty bed?" Your voice breaks in the middle of your ramble, and you can feel the hot trails your salty tears are leaving on your cheeks.
"How can you blame me for waiting when you're the only woman I've ever loved?"
You leave her, for the first time in a while, completely speechless. Every event you name flashes before her eyes, so familiar yet so far away. There's so much she wishes she could say, but she's always been a coward when it comes to voicing what she feels.
"Why did you call me, Elle?" You ask, your voice no louder than a gust of wind. Your bed feels extra cold tonight, too large for you to sleep in it alone. You curl up on your side, clutching your phone in your hand.
Why did she call you? She asks herself the very same question, and the guilt begins to chew on her when she realises she doesn't have an answer for you.
"I...." Her voice breaks. "I don't know. I just...I wanted to hear your voice. I missed you, I guess."
Her answer is as unsatisfying as you guessed it would be. For some reason you hoped that she'd confess her own love for you as well, telling you everything you've longed to hear for all these years. But her answer is as vague as always, and the disappointment burns.
"Did you know that Gideon left, too? And that Hotch and Haley got divorced?" You ask meekly, toying with the silky sheets under you.
She knows. She hates herself for it, but she's kept tabs on all the team since she left. She knows about Gideon, about Hotchner's and Haley's divorce, about Haley's ....
Every single time she finds herself reaching for her phone, about to type in a phone number, she has to remind herself that it's healthier for her not to reach out. But each time, it has gotten more and more difficult.
Her voice comes out soft and remorseful. "Yeah, I know, I...I've heard."
Oh.
"I got taken hostage a few months ago. Barely made it out alive, was in a coma for two weeks. Did you know that?"
Her blood runs cold in her veins as you say that, her heart rate increasing immediately. Her hands begin to shake and her eyes widen.
"No. I- no, I didn't know that. You...?" Her voice falters as she begins to ask that question, and she pauses before trying to finish that sentence. "You were in a coma? What happened?"
There's something satisfying about hearing her panic, however cruel that might be. It feels good to know that she didn't reach out because she simply didn't know.
"There was a bomb. I was too close. Hit my head against a block of concrete so hard my skull fractured and my two of my ribs broke off, piercing my lungs."
The moment you say all of that, she actually feels dizzy with panic.
Imagining you lying on the floor in pain, struggling to breathe, struggling to stay alive.. She can feel her nausea rising as her stomach twists.
Elle can't speak as she thinks about all of it. You could've died. She almost lost you and she wouldn't even have known. Would Garcia have told her?
"I'm okay now, though," You whisper softly with a smile, hoping that she can hear it through your voice. "Sometimes I get really bad migraines, but the doctors say I shouldn't have any other complications."
She tries to collect herself, steadying her breath as you tell her that you're okay. Mostly okay, she should say. But you're here, so that's what matters.
"Y-yeah?" She asks, her voice a bit shaky. "How long ago was this, baby?"
Baby. She always used to call you baby. It used to fill you with fluttering butterflies but now it just feels like swallowing acid.
"I think it was at the beginning of the year. It's July now, so 5 months at least." You hum in thought, counting back the months on your fingers. A car drives past your window, the lights flashing, and it feels melancholy. You can't help but let your mind wonder and imagine it's Elle, coming to see you. But she won't, you know she won't.
"Five months..." Her heart aches to think of you going through all of that, dealing with that alone, while she didn't even know. Didn't even check up on you. She hates herself for it, even more than usual. She feels like she's going to throw up.
"Y-you never, did you..?" She can't even get out her question, swallowing heavily. "...call me?"
"...I tried to. I asked Garcia if she could find any way for me to contact you, but she never managed to. You disappeared pretty good on us." You laugh a little, but there isn't any humour behind it. Just a little hurt.
Her heart sinks at your answer, and she closes her eyes in anguish. Goddamn it. Of course you tried to call her. Of course you wanted her there.
"Yeah, I..." She tries to speak, tries to find her words, but she can't. Not when she knows how badly she hurt you.
"M'sorry." She finally murmurs, a bitter feeling bubbling up her throat.
You coo at her. "It's okay, Elle. I'm fine now, aren't I? And you're on the other end of the phone. No need to fret about it now. I didn't mean to make you feel bad with all of this, by the way. I wasn't trying to rub it under your nose. I was just curious if you knew."
She swallows at that. Even now, even after she's abandoned you, left you behind, caused you pain, you're still trying to comfort her. Trying to make her feel better, trying to tell her what she wants to hear.
She doesn't know why she expected something else, but she hates it.
"You're too kind for your own damn good, you know that, Y/n?" Even saying that is hurting her.
You don't know what to say to that. You've never been good with compliments or praises of any sort, so you just blush and change the subject.
"Did you know that Spence and Morgan still talk about you? Oh, Elle would've known this and Elle would've liked that gets thrown around the office pretty often."
A faint smile tugs on her lips and a small laugh escapes her.
Thinking about Spencer and Morgan still having her in their thoughts doesn't make her feel exactly good, but it makes her feel something.
"Really now?" She asks, her voice still a bit rough from earlier, trying to mask her excitement. "What do they say about me?"
"They still value your opinion very highly, even after all this time. It wasn’t always like that, though. Your name has a lot of respect at Quantico now, but it was a very sensitive topic for a good while. You're missed....I miss you, too." I reminiscence, letting my eyes fall shut. If I try hard enough, I can pretend that she's here and that we're talking face to face, not thousands of miles apart.
"Where are you? Are you still in the US? Or did you leave?"
"I'm still in the US," She replies softly, the corner of her lips pulled back in a sad smile. "I'm in New York. I...couldn't imagine going farther than this from here."
"The Big Apple, huh? I've never been. It sounds awesome, though. I'd love to go one day as a tourist, not as a profiler. Fly economy and all that stuff." You laugh softly, turning to lay on your back.
She grins widely because the thought of you walking around New York, on a vacation, having a good time - it seems like a faraway dream to her.
"It is awesome.There's quite a bit to do, and to see. Especially for a tourist that's not on call."
The hours of the night are catching up to you and you can feel sleep pushing it’s dull claws into you, but you don't want to tell her that. Hanging up could mean never talking to her again.
"Is the subway really as dirty as they show in movies?"
She responds with a snort and an eye roll. "It's worse. Far worse."
"Yeah?" you ask, giggling quietly. "You're having hand to hand combat with the rats?"
"It feels like it, honestly," She grins at your question. "Fighting them for a seat, that is. I feel like I've seen more rats and roaches than human people."
You let out a loud laugh at that and cover your face, letting your phone drop from your hand, your heart feeling light.
A genuine laugh escapes her at that, and the sound of it surprises her. When was the last time she had laughed like that? Was it back when she had just started at Quantico?
For a moment, it feels like the years between the two of you have disappeared, and she's in your bedroom, laughing with you as the night deepens. As the noise calms down and both of your breathing returns to normal, you feel tears prickling in your eyes yet again.
"Will I ever see you again?"
Her body goes rigid at that. She was just having a good moment with you, giggling and laughing, and now...her stomach is in knots.
How could she answer your question? She wants to say "yes, of course", but that wouldn't be true. She wants to say "no, probably not", and that wouldn't be fully true either.
Instead, she swallows and says, "I-I don't know, Y/n. I don't know."
You expected that.
"Tell me that I will, Elle. Tell me that you'll be here tomorrow morning, that you knocking on my door will wake me up. Even if it’s a lie. Please tell me." You beg, a sense of urgency and desperation in your voice.
Her heart thumps wildly inside her ribcage as she listens to you. It's like her heart and mind are having a mental battle, because they want completely different things.
She wants to be there. She wants to be the one to wake you up by banging on the door, she wants to see you in all your glory, hair and clothes messed up from sleep, your cheeks puffy...she wants that more than anything in the world.
But it's not so simple. Her mind is reeling with all the reasons why this can't happen, why she shouldn’t grant you the peace of her saying it, but she can't help it. You’ve always been her vice.
"Please tell me that I'll see you tomorrow." you plead again, your voice cracking. Your heart is constricting inside your chest.
Her resolve begins to crumble at your desperation. God, you're begging her. And she can't find it in her to disappoint you.
"You'll see me tomorrow," She finds herself saying, her voice barely above a whisper. It hurts her to say it, because it's a lie. Because it won't be true come the morning, which means she's setting you up for that same disappointment she tried to avoid just now.
You quickly wipe the tears from your cheeks with the back of your hand, nodding along, feeling reassured. Kind of.
"Will you- will you hang up, now?"
She doesn't want to. She wants to keep talking to you, but she knows she's keeping you up. She can hear the tiredness that’s laced in your voice.
"Yeah..I should," She murmurs begrudgingly, her voice thick with emotion.
Your resolve breaks.
"I love you, Elle. I don't think I'll ever stop," You can't help but confess, the words feeling like shards of glass leaving your mouth.
Her heart shatters into dust when you say the words. It's the most beautiful and yet the saddest thing she's heard in years.
She knows, of course she does. She’s always known that you loved her. Back when you were sneaking around with each other, when you were convulsing around her fingers, your climax having you cramped up, the three words always fell from your lips one way or another. She just didn’t have it in her to say them herself. But now, she has to cover her mouth to stop herself from confessing the same. Her breathing wavers and her hands shake.
"Don't say that, Y/n. Don't say that," She all but begs, her voice strangled and strained.
"You know that I do. My heart is yours and yours only. You know that, too." you keep on going, your voice thick with emotion.
The words pierce her like a dagger right into the heart. She can't deny it and she can't tell you to stop, so instead, she responds with a soft, broken, "I know, I know you do. And you know that I feel the same.”
"Say it, Elle. Please? Say it properly." You plead her gently, toying with the straps of your sleep top. You suddenly notice that it's one of Elle's old shirts that she left here. You swallow back a sob.
She feels her heart beating erratically as you urge her to say the words. It's such a simple thing, just three little words. Three words that she's wanted to say to you for years, but always held back.
"I love you, Y/n," She finally confesses, her voice quavering. "God help me, I love you."
You laugh softly and close your eyes as you finally let the tears stream down your face freely. Hearing her finally say those three words was probably the most painful thing you’ll ever experience, but it feels euphoric. After all these years.
She isn't sure how to label what she’s feeling. Relief? Anguish? Saying that she loves you should make her happy, but all she feels is a deep aching pain because she knows that it isn't going to change anything. But what’s done is done. She can't take it back now, and she's just made the whole thing so much harder.
"I'm sorry," She apologizes, her voice cracking now. "I'm sorry, Y/n. I love you, I've always loved you, I'm so sorry."
"It's okay, honey. You know I'll always forgive you, and this time it isn't even your fault. Thank you for loving me. I love you, too. I'm ready to hang up now, if you want. I know this can't be easy for you either."
She can't speak past the lump forming in her throat. How do you always manage to forgive her? Saying that this time it's not her fault. You're so kind, too kind. But you’ve always been like that, and she feels sick for taking advantage of that. She wouldn’t deserve you even in a million lifetimes.
"Yeah," She manages to croak. "I should go, and you have to get some sleep. It’s late."
"I don't know if you'll call me ever again, but thank you for doing it today. It feels nice, talking to you again. I missed you terribly."
Her heart breaks hearing that you think this might be the last time she ever calls, even though there’s a high possibility that it is. She wants to tell you that she'll call you again, and again and again, but she can't. She can't promise you that. She can't make you false promises, not anymore. So instead she just murmurs, "I missed you, too. Night, baby."
"G'night, Elle.." you whisper, barely audible, and press the end button. A small click sound echoes around the now eerily silent room and you let out a wail, falling on top of your pillows in sobs.
Elle can't move for a few moments after you hang up, just sitting and staring at the wall. She feels numb. Cold. Empty. Why the hell did she do that?
She can still hear the sound of you crying, it was so distinct and full of pain, even through the phone. She's the one that did that, she made you cry. It’s just like the day she left.
With a pained cry, she brings the phone down to her lap and buries her head in her hands, squeezing her eyes tightly shut.
You don't know whether to hate or to love her for picking up that phone tonight and pressing that call button. Your heart feels strangely light after finally being able to free itself from all the emotions it’s had to carry over the years, but your soul feels terrifyingly empty. What now? You just go back to your everyday routine and pretend that tonight didn't exist?
The same thought is racing through Elle's mind. There's a small part of her that's glad she managed to hear your voice again, but everything else...god, she just made things so much harder for the both of you.
You're going to wake up tomorrow morning, and there won't be anyone at your door.
That realization, that she did that to you...it kills her. But right now, she can't undo it. What's done is done.
It's stupid, but as you lay on your cold sheets, alone yet again, falling in and out of consciousness, you can't help but hope that you’ll find her behind your front door as the morning comes.
hi please excuse the repetitive words and the medical talk idk if your ribs piercing your lungs is either survivable or puts you in a coma
#criminal minds#criminal minds fic#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds angst#elle greenaway#elle greenaway fic#elle greenaway x reader#elle greenaway x fem!reader#elle greenaway angst#elle greenaway smut#criminal minds imagine#elle greenaway imagine#criminal minds smut#criminal minds x fem!reader#elle greenaway x you#elle greenaway x y/n#criminal minds x you#criminal minds x y/n
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this will stop your addiction to scrolling.
do you even realise how long an hour is? 2 hours, 3 hours, and it goes on.
in this post, we will be chatting about all things scrolling. learnings from a book i read, sciences, information from articles, the negative impacts of it, and ways to fix it. grab a snack and a warm cozy drink, because this is gonna take a while! ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
many times i sit at home thinking that that i "haven't got enough time" to use a whole hour of my day just doing one thing. but then i open my phone, i impulsively go to youtube shorts. "one video" i tell myself. but its never just one video is it? i ended up on my phone for a bit over 1 hour that day. it was disgusting. it made me so mad. i could have spent that time on a hobby, a skill, with my sibling, going for a walk, reading, doing something, anything else! but i didn't. i was so angry i immediately put my phone on airplane mode and switched it off.
see, the thing with scrolling is that you dont even realise how much time has passed! at first it may just be 2:30 but then the next minute you look at it, its already 4pm. and boom. 1.5 hours of time, valuable time has just been gone, evaporated, into thin air. do you not get disgusted of yourself?
the amounts of negatives to scrolling will easily outway any value it brings. whether its youtube, instagram, tik tok, twitter, etc. whatever value or thing you're trying to achieve from these, there will ALWAYS be a better alternative!
this is one of the concepts in the book Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. it talks about the philosophy behind reducing the time you spend on technologies. see your time as money- say an app charges you by the minute. would you use it as often? you'd probably try to find different ways to getting that same "value" you think your receiving from these addicting apps.
example (for more older people):
you may tell yourself that by being on twitter for hours on end is useful because it can help you get knowledge, news and new connections with people, but that same value you can get- if not more- from just attending monthly or quarterly events, or having a conversation with people, or hand picking a few honest and effective articles to read for a couple minutes each day. as you see, immediately you start to get the same effects you'd be getting from twitter- but more + with much less the amount of time.
or an example from platforms like yt, tiktok, etc.
if it is planned and you've actually told yourself "i have worked very hard, i deserve having a bit of down time to scroll and switch off." , go ahead. (of course there are ways to get that same brain switch off feeling like doodling/ colouring, writing a diary and letting your mind wander, reading a fiction book, taking a bath, etc. but if you've intentionally made this choice, if you truly think this is whats right currently, go for it.)
but lets be real. a lot of the time, its unintentional. even if we have chosen to do it thinking that it is the best thing to do, are you really willing risk hours of your valuable time? "one more video" we ALL say that. its not new. so dont you ever get tired of your excuses? tired having your time thrown away just because you couldn't control yourself? what is that pleasure we get from scrolling?
dopamine.
scrolling activates the brain's reward center by releasing dopamine. every new mini video, like, comment is always keeping us hooked, making us want more and more until it never ends. until its 10pm at night and you're still here. on your phone.
ok so i know i've yapped on a lot. in fact you're probably too lazy and have to less of an attention span to read it all. (yep, also the effect of scrolling.) so,
heres a list of all the harms of scrolling: to enlighten you, not to scare you. (okay maybe a bit to scare you)
lesser attention span. as i mentioned earlier, scrolling reduces your attention span which means it reduces the amount of time you can spend reading, walking, just sitting idle. or you even may not be able to watch a movie without having something on the side like your phone to scroll on! (guilty😬). when that happens, you know something is seriously wrong. if you want to be able to watch a movie without needing all these different distractions, keep reading.
makes you more bored. yeah! i was surprised by this as well ngl!! this also applies to the point about attention span. scrolling can make you feel more bored because all that scrolling, and your brain being super hyper will make you feel bored at the things you used to feel excited by (ex: watching a movie! , reading a book)
increased anxiety and stressed. imagine not being able to stay away from your phone for even a few hours without feeling stressed. thats just so sad but also a truth for many of us. not just that but it can also leave you feeling overwhelmed and hopeless.
sleep disruption. this isn't new. we all know that scrolling late until night not only can affect your sleep schedule/ sleep timings, but also the blue light from your screen stops your brain from making melatonin (a hormone that helps you sleep), which then also affects your sleep. and we know what that can lead to.
on top of all that, it can make you disconnected from real life, nature, increase comparison, harms relationships, productivity and focus and the list goes on.
but you probably don't want to listen to this anymore. you're here because you may be feeling angry. angry at yourself, at your phone, at the internet for taking away so much time that could be spent living a happier life. you have actually felt the harms and now want a change.
[disclaimer: not all of these tips can apply to you depending on your job, your situation, career, relationships, etc etc. take and apply whatever you can.]
tips to stop scrolling (as much):
delete all the social media apps. anything that you scroll on frequently, delete it. this isn't to say that you can't access it at all, you can have it on your laptop or ipad. but the point is that it will increase the friction between you and opening that app.
switch up your feed. this is the very least you can do. start by pressing "not interested" on anything that isn't providing you any actual value. start following people who do provide value. slowly, change your feed to a more positive, motivational page which just makes you feel more inspired/ better every time you leave from it.
set a screen time limit on your phone + set the password as "i failed". this is something i got from online a while ago and its such a good idea! not only will the screen time limit prevent you from further usage, but also setting a password like "i failed" makes you really feel the impact of betrayal to yourself which will make you refrain from doing so!
slowly by slowly, work to reduce the amount of time you scroll everyday.
find the alternative!! okay so now you arent on your phone, aren't scrolling. now what? if you dont already have things that you can do in this immense amount of free time you have, then of course you'd surrender back to scrolling. fill your days with hobbies, new skills, being with other people, with nature, with meaningful and fulfilling activities. "do more things that make you forget to use your phone."
linking back to the earlier point, GET A HOBBY. ngl, it is SAD to only spend your days, vacations, weekends on the damn phone. get off of it! is your life that sad an empty that you have literally nothing better to do then scroll on your phone? thats actually pathetic.
switch off notifications / put on do not disturb- so you dont get constantly reminded
find out why you start in the first place. for me, it used to be an escape to bad things happening in my life/ around me. once you get to the root cause of why you actually start, work back from there. is there away you can remove that trigger from your life? if not, find a different activity that can help you with that trigger.
keep your phone away from your bed. i do this its actually really helpful because it gets me out of bed to have to turn it off which means i dont go back to sleep. also: if you can get a alarm clock which isn't your phone, even better!
things you can do instead of scrolling:
read a book (if its fiction it may be more enjoyable, but its your choice!)
have a shower
set some goals & a to do list for the day
do a puzzle
wordle
try a new skill/ hobby: crochet, guitar, writing
paint/ draw. and stop making thinking it has to be perfect!! if you see it as perfect, it is.
journal / diary writing
hang out with a friend/ someone
cook/ bake
go for a walk or run
learn something new
put a facemask on
listen to a podcast
sleep
yoga/ exercise
write thankyou notes to people
gratitude list
skincare/ a fun grwm of you!
go to a restaurant
style your clothes
make a wishlist
clean out your camera roll
listen to music & just chill
dance
scrap book- phsysical or digitally!
clean/ organize a space
watch a TV show/ movie- WITHOUT your phone.
go swimming
learn about plants so you can start gardening
other things to read:
Psychology behind it, neuroscience, etc.
why you can't stop mindlessly scrolling + tips
BOOK: Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
reddit
#agirlwithglam🎀✨#social media#scrolling#quit your scrolling addiction#quit scrolling#addiction#it girl energy#self improvement#becoming that girl#girlboss#girlblog#self development#it girl#self love#girlblogging#itgirlism#health#wellness#it girl tips
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hi !! can you do a gideon graves x male!reader who owns a flowershop? (if you dont do male readers thats ok lol, gn!reader is good too)
Better than Any Boquet
(a Gideon Graves x male flowershop owner! reader)
EEE MY FIRST REQUEST !! (TYSM ANON IM LITERALLY SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS) ALSO I DO ALL GENDER READERS !! SO MALE READER ISNT A PROBLEM AT ALL !!! ^_^ (ALSO I WILL SAY THAT THIS SUUUUUPER LONG. I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT ANY SHORTER BUT PLS DONT BLAME ME IM BARELY STARTING 🙁 ) BUT I RLLY DO HOPE U ENJOY BC THIS HONESTLY TOOK ME SO LONG TO PUT TOTHER. BUT THANK U AGAIN !!! <3333 (also this isnt proofread so)
Gideon had been acting..strange lately. The league noticed, his employees noticed, even he noticed ! But, nobody could seem to pinpoint what exactly it was.
He had been going out more, being a little bit less harsh on certain people, and the biggest thing people noticed was the amount of flowers around now. Of course nobody dared to ask, heavens no ! But still, it was strange. It’s not like he was a big fan of the flowers himself, but for some reason he had so many around.
Eventually, it had started as a routine. Day after day he would do the exact same thing ! Saying he needs to go do something ‘important’ out, taking his leave, and ending up in the local flowershop. But why ? Its not like he was there for the flowers, no. He had a better reasons.
He walks in, his mind somewhere else before hearing something that completely snapped him out of it. A simple, “Good morning, Mr, Graves!”
< Thats > what he was here for.
The nice owner, thats what he was here for! How could we forget? How could he forget such a nice boy, the same boy who helps him every day no matter how many questions he asks or how many times he ends up repeating them. He even remembered his name! Not by the fact that he’s THE Gideon Graves, but by the fact that he comes in every day to his shop !
Will he ever admit its for him? Maybe later. But right now? Certainly not ! He can’t lose such a ‘friendship’ with this lovely boy he’s met ! For now, he simply comes in, looking for him at the desk in the front. Asking things such as “How do I take care of these?” or “What type of flowers would go best with this event ?” . Simple things to hide the fact that he’s only there to see him and to hear him talk.
After about an hour of mindless questions and small talk, he comes home, once again with a boquet of flowers in hand. He couldn’t help it ! He HAD to buy flowers every time he’d go in there, or he’d leave feeling a bit bad. So, there he goes, grabbing another empty vase and putting some water in it, then placing the flowers inside.
He sighed, looking around at all the flowers he now had. How long could he keep this up ? How long could he push his feelings for this boy away and just keep going and buying flowers, never making a move?
It honestly didn’t take long, he was running out of room for flowers and was so head over heels he couldn’t help himself anymore.
Though, for the first time he couldn’t help but feel a bit afraid. Would you like him? I mean yeah, he does have quite the name and ego, not to mention the billions he has in cash, but would you really find him attractive? He guessed he’d just have to find out.”
He spent about a week thinking about this.
Infact, he spent the whole time trying to distract himself, he had forgotten to go to the flowershop. After the week, he had finally decided to go say something. Thats when he remembered. He spent the whole week away from YOUR presence after being there non-stop for a few months!
Now he was really worried. He probably made you sick thinking something must have happened since he stopped coming for a whole week!
So, off he went! Sprinting down the street to the flowershop, holding on to his glasses for life. His plan? Say everything through a letter. He couldnt get himself to say it to your face, no matter how big of an ego he had.
He comes in, pushing the door open, almost falling over as he catches his breath before looking up. And there you were, making direct eye contact with him as you out new fresh flowers in a certain section.
“Mr. Graves! There you are! I was wondering where you’d been.” You say, giving him that same, sweet smile.
“Please..call me Gideon.” He says, closing the door behind him as he comes in entirely. “I have something..a bit more important for you this time.” “Anything! What do you need, Gideon?” He liked how you had listened without a question.
“I need a boquet of roses, the best ones you’ve got, and I need you to put this letter in there. But, I’d like you to read it first.” He says, handing the note to him. “I need these by 5 p.m today, and I’d like for you to write me a reply on the letter of what you think.”
With that he mutters a “Thank you” and runs out quickly, not even giving you a chance to respond.
You stand there, a bit dumbfounded. But, there was no need to go chase him down and question him. It seemed simple enough. So, you grab the roses, picking the best ones as he’d asked. Then, the letter.
You grab the letter, opening it slowly, then is when you get met with something..suprising.
“Sorry about the leave, I couldn’t be here for this. All these visits were never about the flowers, it was about you. I wanted to get closer, but never knew how. I’ve liked you for all these months, and never knew how to truely say it. You were always too kind, and quite the handsome man too, giving me that smile every day I walked in, no matter how clueless I was about anything. Especially the flowers. But you always listened to me. But, I do love you and everything you do a lot. And I would love to have you by my side. Because to me, you’re better than any boquet.”
#gideon graves x reader#gideon graves#scott pilgrim x reader#scott pilgram vs the world#scott pilgram takes off#x reader stories#fluff#??? idk#i love gideon#thank u sm anon#writer#new writers on tumblr#vancesrambles
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HELLO!!! congrats on finishing the intellect skills!!! :D!! this ask is your free pass to share any INT quotes you didn't get to share this week >:3!!! i would LOVE to read all of your cool quotes!!! <33 (if you have more than can fit in this ask i CAN AND WILL SEND YOU ANOTHER if you want me to!! hkjg <333)
hello voli!! ooh... I like this. You also get my not-asked-for comments on them, yay!
fair warning that most of these are probably 'less good' quotes since i had to pick and choose the ones I liked best to put in the posts. but. anyway.
making a cut here because it's gonna be loooong
lots of Logic ones! he has the most passives of all the skills so...
hehe logic won't let you mess up some important stuff!
this second one, Kim will stop you. And if Kim's not there, Reaction Speed will stop you (easy). And if RS doesn't fire, Logic stops you haha.
he gets so excited! very rarely!
go go logic deny it!
big one, but I love when so many talk at once. yeah logic, why didnt you think of it?? hmm??
as always, it's you who's dumb! never ever logic
it's endlessly funny to me when the skills ask the others to contribute and then they just... dont show up.
good question...
This one is SO funny. Logic. ily. this is also a Medium check!! I completely missed this one when searching through earlier. I wish fayde could just bomb my computer with all the logic dialogue so I could sift through 80 pages of it, instead of limiting it to 100 results :(
(this shows up if the query is too big - Sorry, all the words from your query were filtered out. Please use less common words, and ones which are longer than 1 letter (partial and mid-word matches count, you see, so searching 'd' would return everything with a 'd' in it, and that's like 53,000 records, you won't want to read all that!) and, like... no, no, you are severely underestimating me. I actually do want to read all that, desperately)
anyway.
Logic passive fails my beloved
is he not creative enough to make something up?? echem, drama, and inland come up with times for him
hghhk the great serotonin jackpot. I'm super normal about electrochemistry. who is NOT an int skill and will have to wait. logic's comment heals your morale!!
ah yes, very normal things for a joyrider to have in their car. ty logic!
his love of jigsaw puzzlessss
what could go wrong??
related:
this is a different check! but thank goodness for these guys and their stupidly brilliant ideas. saved the day in my 1 INT run.
wow! sarcastic logic my beloved. one second before empathy throws moralism at you
mmm, this one isn't super logic focused, but you can't get this dialogue without passing the challenging Logic passive... and it's really interesting.
this is about to get really rambly but I read a story once about if when you die, your soul travels to a timeline where the flow of events was different and you didn't die. But as your life progresses, avoiding death becomes less and less likely... (eg, avoiding death by getting hit by a bus would take you to a very similar timeline. But avoiding death from old age...) and by the end, the world was unrecognizable. It was a bit sad... I wish I could remember what it was called.
This dialogue reminded me of it. Of the improbable futures. A world where you hit that 3% chance on the dice over and over and it slowly changes everything.
anyway!!
if you didn't deduce that the 2mm hole in the world is a baby pale, a Legendary Logic passive can deduce that it's really off that your radio is catching entroponetic crosstalk all the way in Martinaise.
If you deduce the pale in the church, Soona comments that the recording in the electronic doorbell is likely crosstalk, and Kim makes a comment about often getting crosstalk on the police radio as well.
But it doesn't seem like anyone else has come to the same conclusion...
Harry knows a lot more about the pale than he should.
The final rest state for reality.
hustler logic!!
Logic... come on man. this is not helping. The whole dream is so horrible. He's so nonchalant about it too.
Look at this! The variable is called volition tea... Conceptualization imagining the yummy ginger tea for you is so sweet
I love this. Poor Kim...
Thank you Conceptualization. We would be lost without you.
:(((
poor harry
KIM don't take away concy's poetic name!! >:(
I love these twooo.
and that's apparently 30... uhm. I got extra logic and conceptualization ones in at least..?
you can feel free to send another ask if you actually want even more haha
I was supposed to spend tonight assembling volition quotes!!! and then I somehow got sidetracked on this for (checks clock...) 2 hours. oops. but it's okay cause I picked up lots of other great quotes to shove into my giant doc!
ok :) that's it. thank you for the ask!!! hopefully you don't regret asking (though if you do... you should have known better lol)
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okay your blog is my comfort place so let me just get this out of my system along with everyone else so I never have to think about it ever again.
Karina is not a naive girl, which for some reason, everyone paints her out to be. She’s been in the industry long enough to know how dating rumors can negatively impact an idols career. With that being said, she 100% knew that she was being set up to be in a dating scandal with ljw. Whether she agreed to it fully or not, we will never know.
People keep pointing fingers at it being a promotional stunt to promote their upcoming album/drama, but that literally makes no sense to me because they’re both so successful in their own careers. I think there’s bigger players here that we don’t know about and the ulterior motives will remain unknown.
It’s just odd how dispatch would release the announcement that they’re dating, have absolutely no picture proofs (not even one?? 😭) and then both companies confirming the relationship shortly after. Everything sounds so forced and abrupt and unlike any other idols whose relationships got exposed.
Like when dispatch revealed that joy and crush were dating, they had picture proof of them together on dates and they both shortly went on their ig pages to confirm said relationship. Karina’s apology that she posted didn’t even address that she was in a rs or “meeting someone with good feelings” if anything, I felt like it was void of any real emotion and it was something that she was forced to post in order to diffuse the situation .
The kpop industry is and always will be a business. It’s always going to be about profiting the most and taking advantage of the pawns on the board so the higher ups can reap all the benefits. I’m sure all idols know this themselves. It’s just unfortunate to see it happening with our own very two eyes and watch the events unfold right in front of us.
i agree with you on ppl keep painting jm to be naive or downright dumb sometimes which pisses me off ngl. i think ppl took it too far with stupid cheese cat or just calling her a loser that they started to believe that its true. like ofc i call her those stuff too affectionately but because of this ppl act like jm cant be ambitious or want things for herself. ofc you can keep calling her that and i will too but ppl need to realize shes not some 2d angel character but an actual human being with dreams which she would do anything to achive.
i dont think jm agreed willingly. you can tell by how much she wanted to distance herself from it (dead to romance cap, tagging mj to her glasses bcs ppl thought it was a couple item, singing wanegbt, saying she'll come in the morning but break news dropping instead etc) and i dont think her apology was devoid from emotion. korean speakers talked about how beautiful it was and kmys that were mad at her(hope they die) all came back saying" i love you jimin ofc i forgive you this made me cry. " high chance she was advised to post it but her emotions were real and this doesnt prove dating news really at the end of the day she caused stress for the fans and she was sorry for that no matter the reason. i wish she didnt have to feel this way but she does. she always comes to bbl too when this ungreatful fandom complains about something.
yeah kpop is all business we will never know how much the idols show us is real. at the end of the day all we can do is speculate
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And that... Is the end of Flawed.
Or the one I hosted for my silly event here anyway.
[ TL;DR under read more: The lack of interest and stress I got from irl matters led me to drop the event and ending it early, but! I have a blog made for the sake of continuing/restarting the event.
Please vote on the poll if you want it to be catered to the reader or stick to Yesterday, and be unbiased, too. Vote what you want, and I'll try and make it happen.]
CONTEXT UTC:
So, I know you guys have a lot of questions, and I can't blame you. I know the biggest one in your mind right now, which is:
Why did I end Flawed early?
The reason why I ended Flawed was actually multiple. Please keep in mind that these are for my observations, and overall I'm not blaming anyone for this. I just noticed it and thought I should bring it up lol.
1. Writing for days burnt me out.
Although Flawed is a passion story/project of mine, writing so much burnt me out. And by a lot. There were days I struggled to think of writing because I have other commitments to do, and sometimes its why polls came out super late or super early. I tried to compensate for it by posting 1 poll a day, but when it didn't work, I pushed myself to make more for 1 day.
I wanted so badly for the whole event to flow like a CYOA because by next month (April), I won't be free to host this as I used to with OLC. However, in that process, I burnt myself out to the point I needed to take longer breaks/forget this event.
It sucks. I would not recommend doing this if you think you want to (because it is NOT worth it).
2. Interactions were... Lacking.
This event is interaction heavy, and the reason why is because you guys control the story that Yesterday and others are in. Naturally, this also affects the characters and how I shape Flawed from start to finish. I have a plot line for it, of course, but the interactions were... Not there.
I noticed the usual ones from my mutuals, sure, but there were moments that I felt like I was simply posting to no one. It was unfortunate during the time with Diluc, where I had hoped that some of you would go, but due to complications (ahem, the votes weren't able to decide on going when the deadline was up), I had to write how it's supposed to go with some... Changes.
It also made me feel sad to see that there weren't much (if at all) interactions to Yesterday. Tinuvion received a fair bit, which is nice because he's a little shit (please bully him lol), but Yesterday after the first week and a half just... Didn't get any. At least, in my records.
I'm not saying this to guilt you guys to interact more, but I am saying this because it feels sad for me to see that unlike OLC, this... Flopped. I had a lot of responses + moments planned if it took off that much, but... Oh well. There's always that one story that won't hit for everyone.
And finally:
3. Maybe you guys wanted it to be catered to you, not to an OC.
I had a feeling that, from the start, Flawed may not take off.
Unlike One Last Call (which was a matchup event + story), Flawed was a CYOA but you guys aren't the main focus/MC, Yesterday (my oc) is. I was hoping that with this method, you guys get to play the omnipotent voice and see how far the story can go until it's conclusion.
However, as I hosted the event for the next few days to weeks, I realized that it was simply too difficult. Maybe I wasn't prepared to host this type of format, as ambitious as it is, but I realized that maybe, you guys don't deserve this format and I should've made it catered to a reader insert instead.
It was hard for me to swallow the pill that this event may not be fun for the majority. I knew that having an OC be the MC + canon characters interact with them may be flaky at best (esp the whole OC x Canon being... well. very much a huge "oh dear"), but seeing minimal interaction/interest than my friends were (and people I admire, too. Hi Harmony! o/!!) and realizing that maybe I shouldn't have done this just... Made me regret it.
For that, I'd like to say:
I'm so, so sorry that this event failed. I'm very sorry if you guys expected it to be like OLC: about the reader/reader insert format.
I know it's not right for me to apologize, but I feel that I have to. I let all of you down, and I don't want you guys to be disappointed in something that you all don't like to see in this blog.
So I decided that I'll run this event in its own blog, but here's the thing.
I don't know if I should keep Yesterday in the blog.
I have to open up a poll for this, so here's the options you guys have for it's fate:
If you guys want it to be a reader insert game (aka you are the main star, not Yesterday), I will set up a menu to BUILD your personal darling.
This means that you guys get to decide how darling will look, the gender, their preferences, and even their job. However, this will be for your darling, and if darling dies, you can't use them anymore.
PROS: This is catered to the reader, and thus, you guys are the ones to choose your own destiny. I won't be the one to decide this time, and if the majority agrees on a specific option, your darling will do just that. This is also more open for variety + reader/canon interaction because I know some of you would have a lot of fun being able to see yourselves in the story.
CONS: When your darling dies, you get the chance to restart. However, the game will continue on with a new darling you guys will have to make and the stats reset to zero. The characters will also mention your past darling, and you'll have to restart from scratch. I still need to tweak this, but just know that it is VERY tricky for you if your first darling dies.
If you guys want it to stay the same (Yesterday is the MC), the format will remain the same.
This means what you witnessed here in the blog WILL happen on the other blog.
PROS: You guys get to either continue or restart with Yesterday's story, and with newfound knowledge, you get to choose more options that were previously unavailable. This also opens up to you all being able to essentially shape Yesterday's outlook + what'll happen to them, because you are the one guiding them to their happy ending.
CONS: This one does not offer a restart like the reader insert (one try only), and this could result to another "this'll flop because many people aren't interested". We've seen it happen here, so please decide wisely.
If you guys want BOTH, the format will be different as you have the option to build a darling (reader insert) or stick to Yesterday's story.
This means there will be a new system for both options to be available, alongside new menus!
PROS: You guys get to have a chance of an 'easy route' or 'hard route' and all of you can use your experience/s to get your desired ending for either one <3 go crazy lol
CONS: If you choose one of the two options for both, the latter will be locked. That's the only consequence I have for this one tbh.
So yes, I'd like to say thank you, and sorry for the fail of Flawed on this blog. I wish I could give you all the quality like in OLC, but there were... Too many things to consider. Sobs.
If you guys still want to continue, please lmk. I worked hard on Flawed and I still want to continue, but this time, its a permanent event and will be on my own pace.
Thank you for your support. Again. And I'll see you guys next time (be it a random fic or the next event <3)
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HELLOOOOOOOO THEREEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Do you have any Tf Ocs? or Ocs in general? Asking for no reason (:
-🪐
oh my god so many so many transformers OCs😭 I only have one drawn so far so im just gonna infodump on you so hard
Clapperclaw- my FIRST actual transformer oc :3 hes a lil guy and hes designed to look like a bird!!! and he transforms into a mosquito helicopter! He used to be a decepticon, but he defected after a series of events that kinda made him have an identity crisis.. alsooo hes conjuxed to MisClick!! who ill talk abt now
MisClick- Big blue tank thing!!!! shes a scientist and doesn't prefer fighting, but shes huge and buff and can protect herself verrry well. She was also a decepticon, but didn't really care for sides all the much, but stayed with the decepticons for convenience (first faction that found her, her partner was part of them, they had the materials she wanted for her experiments) but when Clapper defected, she did too.
Current- also a scientist, and specializes in chemistry and biology mostly. and he turns into a boat!!! a big as hell yacht!!! so he a reaall big bot. hes an autobot and in most versions of him hes really close with optimus cus yayyy :3 also his face got fucked up in one of his experiments (acid burns teehee) so he wears a mask most of the time
Pike- okay soo... this guy isss complicated??? the initial reason i made him was for transformers reader insert fic reasons, and then he just kinda stuck around in my brain. sometimes hes with megatron, sometimes with someone else, hes an autobot and a decepticon at the same time , i dont fucking know. the only constant is that he's ancient and doesnt eat energon like a normal person (he doesnt really eat energon at all, he feeds off the energy thats always being dispelled by other bots. hes silly like that)
Crimson- now this guy silly!!! hes tiny and has a liiiittle bit of an italian accent cus his alt-mode is based on my dads car which is a really old alfa romeo (which are italian cars :3) hes silly and always super optimistic and is the reason that Tine eventually joined the autobots
Tine- (placeholder name) Saddest guy on the block. wasn't on a side and was doing his best to survive. kills on sight, takes no risks, serious as FUCK. hated everyone and everything until meeting crimson. saw a silly old man so full of joy and whimsy he couldn't help but fall in love lmao. still very wary around everyone else but can and will kill for crimson (also his alt is a jeep btw)
Prodsling- yeah this is a cowboy. texas accent , would wear a cowboy hat if he could, likes to pet cows and horses, loves driving through mud. hes like a chill southern granpa that sits on a porch and gives weird advice and makes farm animal noises. turn into a pickup truck ofc
Shiver- Weirdest girl on the block. literally your local cryptid that watches u from the shadowy corners and knows all your secrets. actually quite sweet but has the autism that makes you strange and unsettling <3 alt is like??? i dunno some cool black car. she walks silently and is so good at eavesdropping
Polyphon- weird little decepticon kid that wants to be friends with soundwave SO BAD. wants to party, covered in rainbow biologhts. RAVE BOY RAVE TIME!!! has speakers on him :3 here to have a good time not a long time 🎉
Vironmet- Little old lady in the woods that loves to meditate and talk to animals. will NOT HESITATE TO THROW DOWN if you fuck of the forest or anything living in it. bakes you a pie but if your mean to dogs its poisoned. basically what if tfa prowl was a little lady that killed. she turns into a Squirrel i think
Matte- Mercedes that does not quit. stares into peoples eyes menacingly all day. wants to bite. most fucking stubborn guy ever. Only loosely tied to the autobots and just does his own thing, cus literally no one can handle him!!!!!
Nano- tiny little medic! about the size or a human and her alt is basically a swiss-army medical tool! so shes made to have other bots handles her. also shes basically Ratchets child for funsies. tiny, bitey, ready to be covered in energon when its surgery time!!!!
aaand thats a out it so far! I dont have a lot of time to draw them cus im in college snd have ine million assignments 😭 but ill try!!! so watch out for em!!
#transformers#transformers oc#transformers original character#tf oc#im mostly thinking of tfa anf tfp when making these#maccadams#asky
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could i request tachihara with prompt 13 and 21? thankk youu, remember to stay hydrated <3
13 (“Keep looking at others and I will gift you their eyes.”) + 21 (“I don't regret any of the blood I have gotten on my hands, it's for you and only you!”)
this was supposed to go up on monday but the fear of mischaracterization was kicking my ass, sorry for the Tachihara stans that dont think my portrayal is accurate, i tried. i did try to mix up his hunting dog persona at the end, just in case if i missed the mark there.
also i finally got an A03 account in the running! eventually i'll post the event there as well. enough rambling, here you go.
WC 676 // valentines event open!! TWS, blood, threats,
You wouldn't consider your boyfriend Tachihara to be necessarily violent. You'd more consider him busy, you don't exactly remember how you met him but you both are in the Port Mafia together. As of late you couldn't help but notice the more attention Tachihara put towards people who would talk to you. More focused on their words, eyes getting sharper with the more bond you and the other party have. He used to be slightly discourteous towards you until you both got to talking just a bit and he opened up. But him warming up to you suddenly doesn't mean he was any less teasing and insolent with you. Sometimes when his rebellious nature backfired on him you’d get a good giggle or two out while he would be stun locked before going back to the Tachihara you knew.
Then he got softer when you two were alone, you both got to know each other a little more, patching eachother up when missions were rough. Sometimes he would ditch out for plans you made, in a sudden rush then proceeded apologizing after, usually saying the boss needed something done last minute or he wouldn't clarify at all. You didn't mind this soft side of him, understanding how tiring it can be to hold up a big guy facade. When you two went out, he would always pay, at some points you were suspicious on how much money he had, you two got paid the same but you never asked. While you were a little stubborn, he was just a bit more stubborn than you could be, it was just a little fun at times during non serious arguments.
Yet you noticed the tension rise up in his frame whenever someone else was near. The glare that would gladly kill at the person who talked to you for even a few moments. If he was touching you, you’d certainly get a bruise the next day from him gripping down way too hard on your skin.
You did start to mention his behavior towards him in concern, but he always shrugged it off, saying the person did something personal towards him. Your hesitation was not unnoticed by Tachihara. There were certain days where it was worse, but again, he was probably just stressed. Until he started his threats when you were there in clear view. It really only got worse as the time continued and your tolerance and ignorance couldn't last forever. “Keep looking at others and I will gift you their eyes.”
That was your last thread, you started venting your frustrations more clearly and left. The person was only trying to get to know you more and yet they got threatened. This response from you wasn't taken lightly as you noted blood towards where you usually work at. The blood worsened when it led up to your specific work area. Your senses quickly flared up with boiling anxiety and being on guard, where the culprit was gasping away. There was Tachihara, covered in blood, the blood flowed gently down on his arms, the blood falling making quiet noises every time it hit the floor. As you’re taking in the sight with horrified eyes, the best you could do was step back while gripping your free arm with your wrist. Tachihara quickly noticed your presence and smiled casually, he tried to calm his breathing and straightened out his posture before unhurriedly walking over to you. “They put up a good fight but I finally got them, eyes are hard to carve out.”
All you could do was take a step back with disgusted eyes and tensed up muscles that started to hurt.
Even though words didn't have to say it, he didn't take your reaction lightly. “I don't regret any of the blood I have gotten on my hands, it's for you and only you. And I’m aware of what I did, but I hope you understand why I did this.”
The voice was calm, it wasn't the hot headedness tone Tachihara usually used, just eerie tranquility.
#yandere bsd#yandere bsd x reader#bsd x reader#yandere#tachihara x reader#bsd tachihara#tachihara michizou
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now, ofc, i have to ask for a match up! i love them too much to resist. and especially now from you? how could i miss that chance?? 🤍
so, let me tell you about myself: i'm an introvert! 90% intro, 10% extro. i think a lot, constantly thinking about five different things in different languages all at once. i'm very observant and unfortunately mirror people's vibes if i feel uncomfortable or put on the spot. but i love interacting with people that fuel my energy, where i feel real joy and not tired of yapping at all. i love sarcasm, i love bad jokes, i love to challenge people that have negative opinions about important topics. but i suck at giving presentations, i have very bad anxiety when it comes to speaking loud and in front of a lot of people. i also have a very quiet voice to begin with. despite being a thinker, i'm highly emotional in my relationship, love physical touch and being taken care of teehee
some of my interests/hobbies are definitely working out (i do it twice a day), doodling, gaming, reading (actual books as well not just smut 🙃), studying up on history, cooking, and any fixation my adhd deems worthy for a few weeks
i'm not good with ignorant people, i point out bad behaviour on the spot. i speak my mind. i hate baking but man, i love cakes. i also love spice, it's my favourite type of food category. anything spicy, really. oh, and i'm quite indecisive ;-;
fandoms: i need to pull my joker here... you gotta help me, sam. choose between wind breaker, jjk, or blue lock for me
tropes: enemies to lovers, soulmate, love at first sight are probably my top three, not counting dc tropes here 🫣
my type: sylus. I MEAN, i love someone who is in control, who can control me and situations. someone where i can feel safe and turn off my brain for a bit. i don't like to doubt myself or the relationship, so i love honesty. they need to speak their mind as much as i do. i gravitate towards more domineering men, 50/50 on the batshit crazy or kind guys, really. like eevee said, i have a type: the type is trees, i love climbing trees. i like it when they take initiative and show me more than what i have known prior to meeting them. i love a man who can make me laugh! and passion, pls, i'm a scorpio, i love romance and passion in my relationship ahdjsj. someone who can keep up with that is my type 😏
favourites: nagi, rin, barou, kunigami, umemiya, endo, geto, choso, sukuna, inumaki, nobara, utahime, shoko, mei mei dont judge me, beside that weird thing she is so fkn badass
icks: i dislike boring slow pokes/dumb characters and child-like characters. someone who won't put in effort. pls no short king, i'm too tall for them. else i most often find the mc to be lacking to get my interest, i love the bad guys and the side characters
that is all, thank you, dearie <3 remember to take breaks and stay hydrated!!
Tea my absolute BELOVED, I am so excited you decided to participate!! UGH I have had thoughts on yours from the moment I decided to set up this event. LETS GET INTO IT!!
I pair you first with Hajime Umemiya!
⤜♡→ Okay listen, this has actually absolutely nothing to do with the fact I know he’s one of you faves. I am fully going into this with no favoritism or special treatment. I just genuinely think your personalities go so well together. Extrovert x Introvert is one of my favorite ship pairings and I think you both are a perfect case!
⤜♡→ Hajime immediately took you under his wing upon first seeing how reserved and shy you can be at first. He was DETERMINED to pull you out of your shell. What Umemiya wasn’t expecting to fall more and more in love with you with every passing day and with every interaction where he got to peel back your armor.
⤜♡→ Ume is so excited to hear that you love spicy food, because do you know what he’s doing? He is immediately going to the greenhouse where he purchases his seedlings to plant you your own section of pepper plants in his garden. He is so excited when he shows you, going on to tell you how impressed you’ll be with him once he cooks you all your favorite spicy foods. With Kotoha’s help of course.
⤜♡→ No one can tell me that Ume's love language isnt acts of service and physical touch. His favorite past time is taking care of you. he craves the feeling of you in his arms, and will stop at absolutely nothing to ensure you feel every ounce of his love at any given moment. He has lost so much in his life and he was sure to let you know every hour of the day just how precious you are to him.
Umemiya couldn't keep the smile from his face if he wanted to. To him there was something so intimate about bathing with you, it was one of his absolute favorite things to do with you and something he craved after a long day. It had nothing to do with seeing your beautiful body exposed to his gaze, well it had a little to do with it let's be honest here, but he just adorned the skin-to-skin contact that came with this time. Feeling your warm skin so close to his own was his own little slice of heaven.
His lips pressed against your shoulder leaving a trail of kisses along your skin. "You're so beautiful, baby." He hums in contentment against your skin, arms wrapping around your middle as his larger frame dwarfs your form. "I'm so unbelievably lucky that I get to call you mine." His praises of you are whispered against your skin between kisses. His large hands roaming your form as he washes your body for you. "And you're all mine Isn't that right, sunflower?" He grins when you hum in agreement. "And that tattoed freak can never have you right?" Cue Ume getting splashed in the face with water. "Okay I earned that one." Come on Tea it's me you really thought I wasn't gonna mention Endo?
Your next matchup goes to Choso from JJK!
⤜♡→ Choso holds such a special place in my heart, and so do you!! Choso is the older brother type, and has so so so much love to give, If you need to just unwind and have someone ready to nurture and care for you, to just allow you to shut off and recharge for a bit he is definitely your man!
⤜♡→ I feel like Choso is so often mischaracterized as a submissive, while I fully believe sometimes Choso will let you take the reins, this is Choso “you hurt my brothers, its on sight” Kamo we’re talking about here. He has no problem taking control of the situation in and out of the bedroom. And if anyone would dare to make the mistake of hurting or upsetting you, this man would watch the world burn if it meant keeping your smile on your face.
⤜♡→ He is intensely loyal and very passionate, Choso may be a bit behind on the times. But he will consistently go out of his way to show you all the love and appreciation you deserve, which is simly all of it!
⤜♡→ He is nothing short of desperately in love with you. Choso wants to spend the rest of his time on earth with you. He wants to build a family wth you, share a last name, and love you with every fiber of his being.
⤜♡→ He loves seeing you and Yuji interacting, he wants nothing more than the two most imprtant people to him to get along and develop a care for one another the way he cares for you both.
Choso leaned down, tongue poking out of his mouth in concentration as he held the icing bag, he knew your distaste for the act of baking itself but he knew how much you enjoyed cakes. Choso was extremely perceptive when it came to you and how you were feeling. He always noticed even the most minute details. The furrow in your brow, the way you tended to fidget a bit more, how your voice had gone back to a quiet octave. He noticed it all. So he had taken it upon himself to surprise you. He spent the day watching countless videos on cake decorating just so he could impress you with your favorite cake to come home to after the week you’ve had.
He perks up upon hearing the sound of the front door turning he smiles wide, eyes melting with affection as he walks over to you. Leaning down he cups your face in his hands, pressing a long loving kiss against your lips. Dragging you into the kitchen once he pulls from you, presenting you with the cake. Your eyes widen a bit s he presents it to you. “Did you make this Cho?” You ask, eyes wide with surprise at his action. He nods his head, giving you confirmation he did in face make it himself.
The icing is haphazard, it truly isn’t the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen but the knowledge that he made this because he knew of your love for the sweet made you melt into his embrace. “It's perfect Cho.” He could swoon at your words, dipping his finger into the icing and plopping some on the corner of your lips. “Oh would you look at that, it seems your dessert got on my dessert, looks like I need to clean it up.” He coos teasingly before leaning down to capture your lips once more.
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The Break of (a new) Dawn - part 2
"Uhhh, it has been quite a month" an amused Ren looked at his journal again after writing the final words about his last adventure in Tural.
Ren sat in his garden, enjoying an apple, the sun was already shining at this early morning. The past two weeks had been heavy for Ren. Shortly before he left to Tural, last month, Ren acquired a small cottage in the Lavender Beds. The renovation works had to be postponed due to the sudden travels but it was worth it. Ren now finally had his own place he could call home. It became a new routine for him to take the time to write in his journal about his expierences but also about more emotional events that happened in his life. He found that writing is soothing, healing, but also forces him to understand all that happens and happened.
After a few final musings Ren stood up from the table, brought his plate inside and came back outside to water the plants in the flowerpots. He heard a faint moogle "beep" behind him, meaning that the postmoogle delivered some mail in his letterbox. Ren finished his chore and emptied the mailbox. It was then that Ren's seemingly normal morningroutine was disturbed by an overenthousiastic yell from afar. A high pitched voice that he recognised as no other:
"REEEENNNNN !!! YOU ARE BACKKK !!!"
Kaen.
Next to Ren suddenly stood a young Viera with coral red hair, and dressed in a color matching outfit: sneakers, jeans shorts, a singlet and a cap on his head, all in colors fitting his haircolor. Kaen seemed a little out of breath and was a bit sweaty. Ren remembered that the twins Koori and Kaen often used the early morning as their time to workout. Almost always unseparable from each other. This time there was only Kaen, no Koori. Something was off.
"Goodmorning Kaen, seems you found me." Ren let out and amused giggle.
"I ... I did huh. You are a dumb bunny and a scoundrel! You know that Ren ?"
"Why ?" Asked Ren even more amused.
"Well, dumb bunbun, because you return here, suddenly you have a house AND! You didn't TELL US!"
"I was going to, It's also not long since I returned here, I barely had any time for anything so far aside from making this cottage a place to call a home."
"Sequoia should give you bumslaps ..." Suddenly Ren froze and turned a bit sad upon hearing the name of his best friend and former lover. Kaen froze too, realising he shouldn't have said that, but then he said:
"He ... misses you Ren" Kaen stretched out his hand towards Ren's face, a tear was rolling over his cheeks. "We miss you too"
"Kaen, can we talk about something else please?"
Kaen struggled a bit with finding another conversation topic and actually decided to be stubborn. "No we can't Ren. I actually even have a question for you"
"Oh?" Ren looked slightly annoyed and surprised at the same time.
"Yes! So uuuhh, would you like to join us for dinner this evening?"
"Dinner ?" - Yes dinner, Ren, you know, foooooood"
"I know what dinner is Kaen, it's just that I don't really feel in the mood for it today and also I'm not sure if i'm actually ready to see Sequoia yet."
Kaen stepped a little bit closer towards Ren, and took Ren's hands in his smaller hands. Ren's hands felt warm and he could feel the veins running over the palm of Ren's hands. Trained hands of a battledancer he tought to himself.
"Ren, Sequoia had a rough time after you two decided to become stupid and breakup. He sought refuge in alcoholic beverages, some days he even did not came home, then he appeared again looking all beaten up and stinking of alcohol, blood and sweat. We decided to ask his brother Dawn to come look after Sequoia and that helped. But we all feel he is very depressed. I dont ask that you two suddenly make amends and do as if nothing happened. I only ask that you want to spend the evening with us today and share a meal with us. I think it will be good for him to see you. Will you not consider this for me, Ren ? If not for Sequoia then for me ?"
"Kaen, ..." Ren let out a deep sigh and gave his brain the time to reflect. "Alright"
Even though this was only one word, it was enough for Kaen to light up and smile. "Ren ! I promise you that this evening you will be in good company. And if something goes wrong, me and Koori are still there. But promise me Ren, please, that you will try ?"
"I promise that i will try. But that's all I promise."
'"Thats all i ask for. So, I see you this evening then, Ren! Don't be late!"
Ren found himself all of a sudden in a wave of emotions. He remembered how much he loved Sequoia, and how much he still loves him. He remembered how sweet and innocent they once were, how they became the bestest of friends, how they fell for one another and then ... he also remembered that moment where he started noticing that Sequoia often isolated himself and outright dissappeared for some days, without notice. These were the events that led to a fight that then eventually ended up in them breaking up. It all came back in a flash. But he promised that he would be strong.
Ren spent the rest of the morning with gardening, tending to his chocobo Chichiri, helping her with a sandbath and feathercare, making lunch, going out for a run and some excercises, an afternoon nap and then ... the moment to get ready for the dinnerdate.
The Dinner
"So, will you two misschievous boyos tell me why i needed to dress neat and wait here ?" Sequoia was a bit grumpy. He didn't really like all this mysterious behavior.
"Eeh, don't look at me Seq" said Koori with a slight annoyance in his voice. He did not know about his brother's plans.
" You are going to behave yourself this evening, right ? Sequoia ?"
"Yeah yeah, be kind and whatever. I just stay silent and hope that your mystery guest is a talker and not boring to listen at, eat my pizza slices and then bugger off to my bed and read some books or sleep. Not like I care."
At that moment as Kaen wanted to offer the cheeky Sequoia a fierce reply the doorbell rang. Kaen felt a warm change in the cold mood of the evening. Kaen and Koori walked towards the door to welcome their guest and Sequoia stayed seated on the sofa wanting to observe a bit from afar and out of sight. He would say hello when he felt like it.
"RENNNN!! SO YOU ARE THE SECRET GUEST !?" Koori couldn' handle his own excitement and hugged Ren as soon as he stepped inside, Kaen followed suit and before anything Ren found himself embraced by the twins. It felt good see them again.
They let Ren go again and allowed him to step more inside the room leading him to the kitchen. Ren started saying something wholesome like that he appreciated that he was invited and that it was nice to see them all again.
But then... he got interupted by a suprise hug that came from behind him. It was then that he noticed the heavy spicy scent of a perfume he recognised out of a thousand. Sequoia.
When the doorbell rang Sequoia did not pay much attention, yet he observed from afar. But when he saw who stood in the dooropening he felt like he fell through the sofa. Ren. Was he hallucinating ? He sat frozen in the sofa and followed the entire event. but then he stood up and walked to Ren.He actually didn't realise what was happening, he just did, almost automatic, he walked to Ren and embraced him.
The feeling Ren felt that moment was like coming home. Safety. Sequoia still had these strong arms. "Good evening Sequoia"
"I didn't know you were going to be our guest." He still embraced Ren. Koori stepped closer towards his brother and placed his hand on Kaen's schoulder. "You sneaky bunbun, not telling me, heh.
"Okay everyone, I suggest that we prepare dinner, Maybe Sequoia can take care of some nice drinks for us all ? And Ren you are our guest so pls take a seat at the table and relax"
Kaen shoved the pizza they prepared earlier the late afternoon in the oven. After some time the whole room was filled with the inviting scent of fresh food. It didn't take long for the pizza to be ready and soon all four sat at the table enjoying slices of pure happiness.
Ren was invited to tell about his adventures in Tural which was enjoyable for the company. But mostly for Sequoia who was intrigued by the tales of exploration and adventure. After a while Ren was done with his summary of what he expierenced in Tural. Sequoia was very excited about all this and felt more comfortable by the minute.
At that point Kaen silently whispered to his brother that it was time for them to take care of the dishes and leave the room.
"Ren? Sequoia ? We uhh, wish you both a great evening. We will go to our room so that you two have some time for yourselves to catch up with one another."
The twins said their good nights and got cuddles and pets from Ren and Sequoia. Sequoia whispered to Kaen "thank you for this evening" Kaen looked at Sequoia, and smirked "Don't make a mess of this now, see you tomorrow morning"
After the twins left to their own room Sequoia and Ren left the dinnertable and moved to the salon and made themselves comfortable on the sofa.
"Sequoia? Ren asked with a shy undertone in his voice. "Ren?"
"I'm happy that i'm here ...and that we can talk. I missed you a lot.
I missed you too Ren. No matter what happens or happened in the past you will always be my best friend. Always.
I want us to stay like that, Sequoia. Besties.
Sequoia stayed silent for a minute and then smiled and looked Ren straight into his eyes. "That's all i can ever ask for, my dear Ren".
Sequoia, I uhh, there is something i need to tell you. I want us to be honest with each other, and its better that you know this from me personally.
Okay, i'm listening. Sequoia said this with an intrigued look on his face.
"I met someone, in Tural, whom I really really like. A lot." It was clear that this came from Ren's heart, because he was blushing heavy.
Ren was still looking into Sequoia's eyes while saying that and could see that Sequoia held back a tear, but then he saw a smile forming on his lips again. Sequoia then took both Ren's hands into his, moved a bit closer to Ren and leaned in.
"Ren. My only wish for you is to be happy, follow your heart, spread your wings and fly into the open sky. You deserve that. And if you found love then you should take it, embrace it and enjoy the feeling. Like what you once gave me. We work, as besties but not as a couple. I'm too much of a free spirit for that, i want my freedom and I know it may be selfish of my not wanting to give that up. But that's the same as what i tell you: follow the heart, because a heart is always right. So, you give your everything for your lover! you hear me ? And hopefully one day we can meet and welcome them into our family. As ... (Sequoia smiled a little bit cheeky, clearly enjoying this), ehem! As chief of the Treehouse Bunnyboys tribe i give you my blessing."
They both burst out into laughter. Ohh shut up you crazy bunbun! Thank you, Sequoia. You know, this means so much to me. Just know, that I will always hold you dear into my heart too. All of you. No matter where we go, or what happens.
You're a Treehouse bun, Ren. That's a forever thing. Speaking of Treehouse ... Dawn and I finished the actual Treehouse last week.
"Ohhh ?" Ren asked slightly suprised
"Yes, maybe tomorrow you could stop by and then we can show you".
"I would love that very much. "
__
Will continue in further adventures :)
#ffxiv viera#ffxiv wol#final fantasy 14#ffxiv screenshots#breakup#heartache#heartbreak#relationship#gay#gayviera#wolship#it had to be said#dawntrail#we see each other again
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Busy with important family events over the next couple of days, and so I thought it would be good to get a day-and-date release for this Debrief on the latest entry in my Sapphic Valley series, "How You Get The Girl." Be sure to read the story before jumping in!
Did you do it? Did you read the story?
Alright, I'm trusting you. Go ahead and hit that 'Keep Reading' button you scamp.
It only seems appropriate to start this Debrief off by addressing the elephant in the room. I haven't posted anything in over a month, and "By Moonlight" came about a month after its predecessor, the conclusion to "Stone-Cold Lovers."
Work, naturally, has been a major factor.
You can see me talk about that almost two weeks ago in this Tumblr post I made about writing in a coffee shop, which came weeks after I actually started writing during a trip to a friend's house.
===
Side note:
Just wanted to take a moment and acknowledge my beautiful Haley and Emily keychains. My friend who's responsible for the affairs of one ghostly farmer named Jizzabelle (Gisabelle to the laymen) got them for me! Only appropriate after I commissioned some art of her and Abigail.
Emily was my first Stardew wife, and Haley currently holds the biggest place in my heart. They make a lovely duo!
And I'll avoid any sister-wife jokes
===
While I've had some other projects like Zine writing to take care of, work and life can't explain the full absence.
The best way I can think to explain things is that:
I had the general writer's block, and
Despite the best intentions and advice of my irl friends and online pals like @alchemicallymoon and @duelbraids, I couldn't force myself to "break" that block by just... Writing something else.
This is entirely the result of my own psychosis. I have a tendency to carefully plot things out and impose a timetable that really doesn't need to exist. When I feel the cause is righteous enough, it's hard to get around that. In this case, I knew I needed to get my poll-winning idea out after dawdling for holidays like Valentine's Day, and then I knew I only wanted to post one more story before jumping on a very special event for my upcoming 30th AO3 post.
Thus, here we are: arbitrarily forcing myself into a spiral of writer's block misery because of a silly promise on Tumblr and my own sense of ordered chaos.
At the very least, this meant it's coming out not long after my AO3 pal InsertACatchyPennameHere also emerged from the woodwork to tell me they're working on something INSPIRED by my four-person friend group farm adaptations.
Much love to them, wherever they may be.
I'll probably start writing more eclectically now that my shoulders are unweighed, but don't expect my next publication to hit until I'm finished working on teasing the big event. All you Pokemon fans better get hype!
And oh how sweet this publication feels. Between my great set of recent ceramics, the figure drawing class I've been attending, and creative writing, I've felt more fulfilled than ever.
You're here to talk about Stardew, though. So let us talk.
This idea began less with any one event as it did a desire to advance the Alexis/Haley relationship, and Haley's characterization in particular. It was always going to end with watercolor painting reference, but 2 Willow Lane was what I really wanted to dig into.
As I see it, a lot of what keeps people invested in Stardew when its comfy vibes becoming routine is the air of mystery in Eric Barone's worldbuilding. Haley and Emily's parents being some world-traveling duo who left their home in the siblings' care for who knows how long (and who knows how many times over their lifetime) really piqued my interest. So much so that the new writing challenge I set for myself in "How You Get The Girl" was crafting a particularly long set of descriptions that emphasize how overwhelming the parents' influence feels — without creating an impenetrable wall of text.
Hopefully I succeeded in that. Let me know!
I tried to include some vaguely real world-adjacent references into that description of the house, as happens with the magical-realism world of Stardew Valley. For example:
The computer sitting next to their bonsai tree is an iMac G3, the kind of old 'futuristic' tech that my dad loves!
A Speedwell refrigerator is based on even more vintage tech, the Mayflower fridge, but named after a different ship ridden by Pilgrims coming to America.
That city that the family visited in an old photograph with a "monument of arching, interlocking steel" is, of course, Paris — with the statue bookends referencing any number of statues in the Louvre.
Haley's FAD magazine could be referencing any number of publications, but Vogue is probably the closest analogue to what I imagine her reading.
Furthermore, I took some notes on describing the home's layout off of my sister's apartment building, and I asked my bestie @trybard for input on what kind of hanging plant should be used in the transitional hallway. Hanging pothos, philodendron, and spider plants were the three options provided, and my response was appropriate:
They know so much about plants.
Go bug them about it.
I drew on other friends' knowledge to help decorate the house. Specifically, I asked one of my witchiest friends what kinds of protective wards someone like Emily would leave around doorways and windows. She had... A lot of reference material.
I picked Hazel given it purportedly "protects against evil; encourages abundance and inspiration." I also picked Amethyst as one of Emily's loved gifts, one that purportedly "absorbs negative energy, promotes harmony."
My witchy friend is the same one who provided the TikTok that I referenced in my advertisement post:
Perhaps the most important thing about 2 Willow Lane was the recurring motif of Barbie's Dream House.
As a surface-level reference, I think the groundwork is clear. Blondie's love of fashion and general queen bee demeanor fits comparisons to Barbie well, and she lives in a big ol' house full of stuff. We all saw Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie last year. It's still in the cultural zeitgeist.
I'm hip with the kids.
Yet, early on I also tried to make it clear that if this is a "dream" house, it's neither Haley's nor Emily's dream. Haley is a Barbie in that stereotypical sense, but also there's much to be mined from the analogy of a sort of powerless doll in an immutable house, constrained by social obligation to her family rather than literal plastic and stickers.
The cold open of Jodi and Sam was meant to stand alone, but in execution I also think drawing Kent's absence into the conversation makes for a more thematically rich comparison to these sisters who appear to have themselves more put together.
My beta reader said this wound up being one of my stronger stories because of how all of that intertwined, which I appreciated given how down on myself I was following the whole writer's block thing.
But also.
Also.
Alexis gets to be horny. She's hitting on lonely MILFs and watching girls shake their asses to the tune of bad reality TV.
We love a buff dommy mommy farm girl in this house.
Haley is probably horny too, she just doesn't realize it yet. For now I think it's fun enough to play into her being coy about building excuses for Alexis to come over, and then getting incensed when Emily barges in on their private time meant to learn more about this farm girl she just can't get out of her head.
===
Fun fact:
Every story in this series is named after a Taylor Swift song, but I know next-to nothing about her discography. All of them are suggestions by my friend whose house I was at when starting this story — the same one who controls Gardenia on the farm.
While I went with "How You Get The Girl," her alternative suggestion was "The Man."
===
All that w|w talk aside, I also want to give Sam the loveable idiot a shoutout. Had to do a fair bit of research into how skateboards are constructed for his failed ollie, and I slipped in a reference to shitty old technology that's exclusively for my beta reader to enjoy.
I also tried doing some agricultural research to figure out how the folks at Kevin Farm could have grown cucumbers so there'd be a jar of legitimate pickles... But that was getting too in the weeds.
Insert laugh track here
Decided to just go with pickled artichoke hearts to save everyone a lot of trouble.
And where does "Kevin Farm" come from, you may be asking yourself. Or the fabulous "Kevin's Special" with its definitely not innuendo tagline.
That story will have to wait for another day, my friends.
#I really went in on this one#Moreso than I was expecting#But I guess that's what happens when you get very anxious about how people on the internet are judging your ability to do things well#And in a timely manner#Not that I think any of you are judging me#My fans are great <3#Anyway thanks so much for reading!#I promise the Kevin Farm story isn't all that interesting but one day I'll make it relevant to a piece#Fanfiction Debrief#fanfiction#fanfic#companion piece#author's commentary#ao3#stardew valley#stardew haley#writing#creative writing#struggle#macintosh#vintage technology#paris france#louvre#vogue#plants#tiktok#witchcraft#protection#barbie#metaphors
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THE JESTERS' PLAY! an invitation; from clara & lee! — long awaited, 1k follower event !! (CLOSED, STILL FINISHING UP EVENT REQUESTS/ASKs!)
hai :3 im angelism/lee and from this day forward ('till end of may) i'll let this little events pass— for now, but yaaaa lets goo
CLICK HERE FOR MASTERLIST !!
PICK A CARD !! pick a theme!!
X-RATED: The Queen. (smut) — 18+ RATED \\ lust isn't an uncommon sin, definitely deadly, it'll kill you too.
A Toast To Everyone: The King. (fluff/etc.) — MAKE A TOAST \\ pride is indefinitely common, it eats you inside out.
A CARD! BUT OF WHAT KIND? pick a.. another theme?!
One of Spades: Schrodinger's Cat. (headcannons) — if you don't mention anything about what kind of fic, it'll default to headcannons! aka one of spades!
Two of Hearts: Can A Heart Beat even after Broken? (full fic) — this can take long.. but big sister lee will get to work as soon as possible!
Three of Diamonds: You shine brighter than any gem. (drabble) — easy peasy! even clara can help big sister lee with it—! oh.. right.. i can't touch any of the pages 'till they're out.. it could also default to this if you dont mention a card! depends on the prompts you pick! pick as many as you'd like!
Four of Clubs: I love you more than Life. (imagines) — this one is pretty easy too! but it's always what's really just on big sister lee's mind!
SHUFFLE THE DECK FOR ME, WILL YA? pick a prompt!
THESE CARDS ARE RATED: THE KING (FLUFF/ROMANTIC)
I want nobody else, understand that I only want you.
I want you to be in every life with me, I'll even go out of my way to find you.
You didn't have to do this for me you know... // That's why I did it, it was for you.
I could just propose to you right now and finally put this ring on your finger. // Wait.. WAIT—!
I wanna stay in your embrace forever.
Kissing under an umbrella before they drop you off at your home <3
Drunk Confessing; "Heehee... I love you so much you know~" // "I'll accept your confession when you're sober."
"Oh— wow— You look just.. wow."
Just hold my hand, don't be afraid.
I wish we could live in this moment forever.
I wanna wake up next to you in all my mornings.
I fell, and fell harder, but I made you fall too.
Don't think I'll forgive you for what you did. // If I kiss you enough times you will!
THESE CARDS ARE RATED: THE QUEEN (SMUT/18+)
"I've wanted to do this with you ever since we met."
"Haah—! Don't stop!"
"You're more than a one night stand."
"Try to stay a little quiet, just for me, okay?"
"They can't make you feel as good as I do, can they?"
"God— Fuck— You taste good."
"We're more than just friends with benefits, you know that."
"There's people right outside that door!" // "I know."
"Don't muffle those pretty moans, I wanna hear how good I make you feel."
"You look so adorable with my hands around your neck."
"My my, already so wet for me, hmm?"
"Shit.. you feel good, baby."
"You think you deserve this reward?"
"Don't make a mess now.. We'll certainly be giving the maids a hard time in the morning.
"Don't come 'till I say you can."
yippee!! my asks are always open, come on over!! next milestone will be letters from characters! ctto for the prompts! not all are my ideas/prompts! i reworded some of them! PLEASE MENTION WHAT/WHO CHARACTER U WANT :3
#angelism.delusions#genshin x reader#genshin imagines#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact fanfiction#genshin headcanons#genshin impact scenarios#genshin drabbles#genshin fanfic#genshin scenarios#hsr scenarios#hsr x reader#hsr x you#caelus hsr#gepard hsr#zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#kamisato ayato x reader#dan heng x y/n#dan heng x you#dan heng x reader#hsr smut#genshin smut#honkai x reader#honkai star rail x you#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail smut
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