#i dont think anyone would even look but thats fine the goal isnt to be found
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fagutt · 2 years ago
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feelign weird
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leafonground · 1 year ago
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i think toby fox isnt great at writing trans characters actually. like -napstablook despite being referred to as they/them for the literal decade its been since the undertale demo ppl still he/him them. cus tobys never gone out of his way to say anything. and then he MADE THEM a COP in DELTARUNE what the FUCK is WRONG WITH YOU -mettatons backstory is at least existent. but like. why didnt he talk to his literal nonbinary cousin. who he lived on the same snail farm with. about the fact he was trans and got alphys to be his nurse practitioner. or when their other cousin became a nintendo-exclusive trans girl. the underground is supposed to be tightly-knit, the level of community you see in places like snowdin and even in places like the ruins or hotland is one of the most charming parts of the game. why dont they hang out. why is mettaton hunting humans and not terfs no but really, mettaton being done SLIGHTLY better is like. the bar one should have to pass, like everyone who knows the games lore sees the transmasc allegory, even those insistent on misgendering someone like napsta or kris. -mad mew mew (mad dummy) is also a very clear transfem allegory but done slightly better. that being said all of these characters being ghosts that can possess objects in order to have a shortcut to their transition goals makes apparent an issue toby has that ill elaborate more on when i talk about kris. overall shes not done badly in the switch version but the fact that its only in one version is a bit ?. ill let it slide tho -kris is the big one. yeah yeah toby corrected people in the 6th anniversary stream with an incredibly quiet tts voice that the ppl he was playing with didnt hear half the time. but not everyone watched that stream and not everyone cares. plus, kris is a human kid. theyre not a ghost who can speedrun their perfect transition goals like mew mew or mettaton, which toby used in undertale to make the trans allegories stick for people who dont pay attention-- but now that he cant do that he doesnt have any other ideas. so while they look like your average nobinary kid (someone whos prolly never seen an afab enby in their lives in OP’s replies keeps insisting kris looks amab probably only because theyre wearing pants. if youre that person hi please block me) people just project amab onto them cus thats whats “normal”, whats “usual” for video game main characters in our patriarchal society. its like what happens to people in real life. and while a real life enby can correct people themself kris is a video game character so its up to the creator of that character to do it. and toby just like. isnt doing it. i swear to god all he has to do is tweet it. like i get kris isnt like mad mew mew where you can give them boss fight dialogue to spell it out and isnt like mettaton where you can find a secret key to kris’ secret house. and kris has a lot more going on in their character that has nothing to do with their gender. thats fine, thats actually GOOD! but when it comes to kris and napstablook, where unlike mew mew and mettaton their whole character arcs dont revolve around that transition, just. have it written down somewhere. its all you need to do. in a perfect world you wouldnt need to but we dont live in that world and writing trans characters well means taking that into account. tl;dr trans/nonbinary characters whos character arc is “i’m trans” like mad mew mew and mettaton, tobys ok at those. but anyone who isnt a transphobe would be ok at those. writing trans/nonbinary characters who have literally anything else going on and toby completely faceplants. all he has to do is tweet it out. or give teacher alphys a piece of throwaway dialogue about how it took berdly 6 months to get over the fact that you can use singular they/them in sentences. literally anything.
toby fox needs to add like a bit of narration in deltarune abt kris like "they themmed they/themily down the stheirs" cus i cant go on seeing them constantly get he/himmed in yt comment sections
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linkk2146 · 5 months ago
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coming out of a breakup, i realized how mistreated i really was. what i thought was love isnt real love. what they were doing wasnt right but i thought it was cause i never experienced real love before. i was just then experiencing their version of love, which was wildly wrong.
the same is true for friendships, i never really knew what true friendship looked like because of the people i was around. life forced me to surround myself with new people and theyre the ones showing me what being a friend really means. they do things for me that no friend or ex has ever done for me in the past and sometimes, it can be shocking and overwhelming.
im so used to being mistreated all the time that whenever im faced with real love, whether it's romantic or plantonic, i convince myself that theyre just lying to me, i immediately reject the love and start degrading myself. cause why would anyone ever treat me like that? all people have ever treated me like is shit, i obviously dont deserve this and they probably dont mean it anyways.
im working on believing that real love can exist, in both platonic and romantic situations. im not quite there yet but im starting to allow that mindset into my life. im seeing things that friends do for me and realizing that they really would not be doing this for me if they didnt genuinely care about me. i wouldnt be doing that if i didnt care, so why would they do that if they hated me or didnt think the world of me.
its hard but im learning self-love slowly and theres certainly parts of me still that are rejecting that sort of mindset. i just gotta fight against that and allow me to love myself and value myself. its going to be possibly the hardest thing i will ever do in my life but in the end it will be worth it.
theres gonna be times where i want to give up and want to kill myself, like there always have been, but thats okay as long as i let myself have those moments, acknowledge it and acknowledge that i cant give up yet, then move forward.
i still really dont believe a lot of the stuff im saying yet but thats okay. at least i know. and ill get there someday, even if it takes me weeks, months, years, decades, a century, even after im dead. ill still be working because i just cant accept my life the way it is anymore. i gotta learn my own worth, and make myself believe it, or else im just going to keep getting hurt and keep crying for the rest of my life. i dont want that. i want better. i know i deserve better. i just have to train myself to believe that. i can say that i deserve better all i want, but i still dont believe it and i wont get better until i believe it.
i got things to keep me happy in the meantime; games, friends, wrestling. and as long as i dont lose these passions and lose sight of what my goals are and what the reward is, i think ill be fine.
everything will be fine.
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antiloreolympus · 3 years ago
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12 Anti LO Asks
1. arent some of the copies of that lo book upwards of $40 dollars if not more? like bare minimum ive seen it at least $20 even for the paperback but it goes way up for the hardcovers (tho the second vol already had a pretty massive markdown by what i saw on amazon which was ... weird). wt readers flip out over paying a few cents for fast pass, why would they buy the same thing they already read for free for a much higher price thats not even formatted correctly and kept all the typos?
2. i swear LO is making me into a pearl clutching nun. I get its trying to be ~pro sexuality~ or whatever but its so hamfisted in trying to do so and everyone and everything is so horny for??? reasons?? like no one talks or acts like this.
3. the way rachel "designs" characters deadass looks like how NFTs work. she just uses the same template and changes one or two things and calls its unique.
4. Does anyone know a comic where Persephone ACTUALLY chooses to go to the Underworld? Because LO and Ficlets still has her be kidnapped and Punderworld has it just be an accident she ended up there.
5. i think whats annoying me too about all these flashbacks is that im not sure whats actually true?? which i think is maybe the point but even when we see it from h or p's POV it comes across as the worst option? like helios' version actually made persephone look better than reality, hermes' flashback gave her personality and set their relationship better, meanwhile we get it from hxp and hades is just a neglectful ass to a literal child meanwhile persephone just looks like an idiot? like?? 💀
6. The biggest thing to me is these ancient stories don't belong to us, and modern "retellings" are not the "natural progression" of mythology, it's just people taking known stories and more often than not just making fanfic with the creator's biases. LO is allowed to exist, but Rachel is not "keeping the mythology alive" or "adding to the canon" as her fans claim. LO doesn't even fit a loose retelling, and it is not nor will ever be as legitimate as the actual texts. Sorry to be harsh but 🤷🏿
7. The way my skin crawled at the Niobe part… that’s so dumb if RS wants to portray Artemis as good and Apollo as bad why would you choose that myth like 😭 “hey Artemis only killed 6 instead of 7 like her awful brother” how does that even make sense??? Also ofc cutting so much of the original myth like-
From OP: Yeah, it doesn’t even make sense because we hear Leto is a sun goddess in LO but not the goddess of motherhood.
8. i dont get why all of a sudden now persephone wants to be queen? off of what? first its set up on she had goals to get her degree and have freedom, but now she just wants to be his wife? why? second, even her idea of making elysium is just her trying to relive her own guilt, not that she actually cares about the dead. her motives are out of nowhere and purely selfish, which the latter would be fine if LO didnt set up one set of goals but drop them to be hades' wife instead with no reasoning.
9. i think the biggest issue with this trial plot line is one) so dragged out, who cares, but two: hades is both leading up and during this whole thing has been so cartoonishly awful that i dont even care if he points out something right. a broken clock is also right twice a day, but that doesnt mean it still isnt broken. not to mention its very easy to make him look "right" when rachel purposely makes everyone else so irrational/wrong that he looks correct in comparison. that isnt a win, actually.
-----FP Spoilers/Mention-----
10. FP SPOILERS// Hades basically tells Persephone that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in reaction to learning about her sexual assault and that really rubs me the wrong way because that kind of trauma doesn't make a person stronger, it damages you and as you heal you become stronger in spite of what happened so idk that whole diamond pep talk just irked me idk if anyone else feels the same way
11. Fp) Helios (thought it was Hera at first lol) she gives you HOMEMADE birthday cards as a bribe each year how dare you report a homicide she committed... Of course now we will get to know the real story is completely different and Perse is an angel who allowed those poor mortals to duebabd Minthe co. are such a horrible people for lying. She can't do anything wrong. Also, seriously? Russell? Such a Greek sounding name again.
12. I shouldn't be as annoyed as I am that episode 184 was basically more pointless stalling, it's honestly just a trend at this point. Is it bad that I actually laughed when Helios told Persephone that her birthday cards ain't shit? The way she actually tried to guilt-trip him for reporting her murdering people by saying "bUt I mAdE you Birthday Cards!!11" and him njust not having that shit. Beautiful. Also, as much as I was never a fan of Smythe's demonizing of Apollo, I'm not sure I like the direction she seems to go in now, namely the implication that Apollo's predatory behavior is really all Leto's fault because she encouraged it. It's yet another female character Smythe villainized just so Persephone could be the most perfect woman of them all in contrast to all these manipulative harpys on Olympus.
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many-gay-magpies · 3 years ago
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@honeyseungz @loabivey so that uh. that mini au that you had like a very small rb thread about yesterday (well over a few days ago now that im posting this). well uh. um . actually you know what im just gonna let you read it yourselves
so. heeseung, jay, and sunoo are all brothers. wether its actual brothers or just "brothers" by blood bond or whatever idk. but, regardless, they're brothers. im thinking that like, at first they aren't vampires, theyre just regular dudes yknow? (and just a forewarning, a lot of this isnt gonna be as compliant with the enhaverse theorizing we've done so far, it's just a little brain worm i wanted to play around with, throwing a little bit of enhaverse crumbs in here and there)
but anyway. they're not vampires, im thinking theyre just like... adopted/found family brothers, probably orphans or something. regardless they love each other a lot and its great. personality-wise everything is super different, but just for plot conveniences, heeseung, jay, and sunoo are the yunmeng trio (heeseung as wwx, jay as jc, and sunoo as jyl respectively), and jungwon is lwj.
the three brothers meet jungwon, probably brought together by this Big Fantasy Evil, maybe something involving the vampire queen as a character? idk. there's some big evil shit going down, and the three brothers somehow end up with jungwon and HIS big bro, who im imagining is jake (basically the lan xichen in this situation—very soft, kind, gentle; the vibes are right). both of them are vampires, not that our three orphan bois know that. they get caught up in the danger, and vampire bros jake and jungwon coms to the rescue.
now, a little bit of personality-mapping here: jay is outwardly very loud, fun, temperamental, and sarcastic, generally very much like he is irl; but inside, he's intensely loyal, protective, and loving, with a HUGE soft spot for the people closest to him. sunoo is very sweet, sensitive, and kind—the walking hug of the three brothers, who is certainly not without his bite and wont hesitate to talk back to anyone who hurts them. aggressively and without mercy. also he makes them soup for comfort and is generally best boy. heeseung is very goofy, playful, free-spirited, and bright, but insecure and sensitive underneath it all; generally a loud annoying mess of a boy. pure chaotic neutral and a gremlin if there ever was one. jungwon, on the other hand, is... not. he's nervous, quiet, cautious to a fault and intensely righteous, always standing up for what's right and refusing to waver from his chosen path. very lawful good vibes. he, naturally, is more than a little put off when jay, sunoo, and heeseung's chaotic ass come crashing into he and his brother jake's once-peaceful (ish) lives. and it doesn't help that heeseung is a... huge flirt, and apparently deadset on making jungwon his friend. fuck.
jungwon... doesn't know what to do. and it would all be so much easier if heeseung were dumb or stupid or unattractive or just a total asshole—but he isnt any of those things. he's beautiful, smart, insanely witty with a brain faster than any jungwon's ever seen—he can't help but admire him. but on top of that, he's wreckless as hell, unpredictable, and pushy, and gives jungwon heart attacks way too much for his liking. he doesn't even have a heartbeat. he's fucking dead.
it eventually comes out that jake and jungwon are vampires; the brothers are surprisingly cool with it. not the craziest thing that's happened to them.
the five boys get closer, staying together as they fight their foe (which im becoming increasingly inclined to make the werewolves), and through a series of convoluted events, jungwon learns that heeseung is not only gorgeous, smart, talented, and funny as all get-out, but also sensitive, caring, insecure, and thoughtful... and heeseung, who's only goal had been to break through the nervous and straightforward outer shell of his young dongsaeng, does just that. and jungwon, naturally, starts to fall in love.
somewhere along the line, though, things go wrong—as they were bound to do in an au loosely based off of the untamed. something happens to heeseung; he's fatally wounded after saving jay's life, and disappears, nowhere to be found. his brothers eventually assume the worse; that he's gone forever. but the queen finds him, takes care of him, nurses him back to health. turns him.
when he comes back, nothing's the same. the war is still going, and his brothers thought he was dead—but he isn't. but he's... different. jungwon and jake are quick to realize that he's been turned, how, they dont know—but they talk to him, teach him, try to help him, jungwon especially. of course he does; he's in love. heeseung, of course, is dismissive; doesn't take it seriously. ill be fine, whats so bad about this? or, perhaps, he doesn't let on just how hard he's taking it; fearing vulnerability more than he fears being a vampire.
inevitably, though, heeseung's wrecklessness leads to doom—he lets his bloodlust overtake him, relishes in it, no matter how much jungwon had warned him against it, pleaded with him to take caution. he says it's usefull—says he can help them take out enemies, help them win this war. jungwon warns him that he could end up getting more than he bargained for. heeseung doesn't listen.
heeseung helps them win the war; practically wins it for them. hes happy, bitterly, until he isnt. he's happy, until he sees his brother—sees sunoo. blood-covered, pale-skinned, drained.
no.
heeseung is broken. jay even moreso. jay yells at him; yells and yells and yells and yells. curses him out, tells him he hates him, tells him he's nothing but cruel evil—he doesn't mean it, of course, but no one knows it then, not even him. now he is only angry; so, so angry. heeseung, wrought with guilt and shame and grief, flees—hides himself somewhere secluded, does the closest thing a vampire can possibly do to death, the equivalent of a thousand-year hibernation. none can find him, he's made sure of that. in his guilt and shame and anger he stews, asleep, for hundreds, thousands of years.
after the anger passes, jay is more than anything in mourning—for heeseung as well as for sunoo. he has a realization, that being that, when, inevitably, heeseung comes back, he doesn't want him to be alone: even if he'll have jungwon and jake, it won't be the same as having his brother. so jay pleads, cries, begs for jungwon to turn him—so that they can search for heeseung together, so that when heeseung comes back, he'll have jay waiting for him, too. so, reluctantly, jungwon gives in and turns jay—after which he helps him deal with his newfound immortality and vampiric status—helping him handle his bloodlust and helping him learn how to feed. over the centuries that heeseung is gone, jay, jungwon, and jake grow even closer (j line eyyy), inseparable as they search for heeseung and even outside of that. jungwon and jay are the closest, jay growing a colossal soft spot for the boy and not hesitating to take him under his wing and protect him with all he has (initially, sort of as a replacement for protecting heeseung, but eventually jay's affection for jungwon grows into something all it's own). to be clear, no love triangle bullshit here, only sickening-sweet platonic soulmates jaywon and a jungwon that is still achingly in love with heeseung.
(okay for anyone thats actually watched cql/read mdzs, yes i KNOW lwj and jc did not get along at all and kind of hated each other but. this is my au i do what i want, and if i want to add soft jaywon into the mix then im fucking going to, goddamnit)
OKAY TIME FOR SOME WACKY SIDE-PLOT MADNESS
so. sunghoon. how does he fit into all this? how does he end up being the one to trigger heeseung's "resurrection"? how does heeseung GET resurrected in the first place? well, not to worry, you're about to find out! and i am too because i'm just figuring this out as i go along baybyyyy
sunghoon, im thinking, is a friend of jake's (lets throw some jakehoon in here too bcs why not), either from before everything went to shit and heeseung went and isolated himself, or sometime during the numerous centuries jakewon spent looking for heeseung with jay. either way, sunghoon is this boy who jake is friends with and cares about a lot, and is also maybe kind of in love with. while jaywon spend most of their time looking for heeseung, jake spends his with sunghoon—finding himself often alone, now that his little bother is going off on his own adventures.
in a situation quite similar to heeseung's, sunghoon probably gets fatally injured somehow and is near death, but jake, not wanting him to die, decides to turn him instead. niki is also involved, and it's a sort of package deal, because before meeting jakewon, heeseung, and everyone, they were their own little thing; not unlike jay, heeseung, and sunoo's brother's triad. they were both probably orphans, niki being the much younger one, and as such sunghoon took him under his wing and never looked back. when jake turned sunghoon, niki was basically like "m8 what the fuck" and demanded he be turned too, not wanting his sunghoon-hyung to live on forever while he grew old and died. jake, also having a soft spot for niki, was like "fine alright" and turned him too. so, now their little vampire coven numbered five, and all was (moderately) well.
or not.
the thing was, jake hadn't anticipated how powerful sunghoon would be—there's nothing in life that anyone's found yet that would indicate a person's level of power once turned, so jake had... pretty much no way to see this coming. but, anyway, sunghoon was... really, really powerful. like, insanely powerful. all the abilities vampires were said to have in legends, the likes of which were previously reserved for just legends, he had them; flawless teleportation, mind control, shape-shifting, the whole bit. and on top of that, he was controlled—insanely good at monitoring himself and keeping tabs on his own instincts. one of the most self-sufficient, well-mannered vampires jake had ever seen. it was... frankly insane.
the problem? the queen. this is where she comes in, because she's played a part in all the boys' transformations, albeit indirectly—when jake and jungwon first turned, it was she who turned them. she could sense sunghoon's power, and she wanted it for herself. jake and jungwon had done well at avoiding her, even forgetting about her for a while; but what she wanted, she took, and take she did. it was sunghoon she took: luring him to her in small increments and then all at once, taking control of him, turning him into a mindless puppet. sunghoon had always prided himself in control, and without it, havoc wreaked: bodies dropping left and right, people being killed seemingly at random, their only purpose being to instill fear and paranoia.
now, niki had heard tales, before, from his hyungs but also from regular townspeople to whom the legend had gotten passed down, of heeseung, and how great and terrible he was. heeseung, the townspeoples' folktales said, had been insane, unstoppable: a mad genius far too gone for redemption. niki also knew from his hyungs' fond stories that heeseung, more than evil, was kind and caring; he was loyal, and powerful in his loyalty, and niki thought that if anyone could save his sunghoon-hyung, it was heeseung.
so niki went on a journey. without telling jaywon or anyone else (and thus causing quite the panic), he spent years searching for heeseung, everywhere jaywon had thought to look and everywhere they hadn't, and twice more for good measure. and, by some stroke of luck, either due to his own sheer force of will of something else entirely, niki found him: locked away in an old castle that never quite seemed to stay put, constantly phasing in between realities. it made sense why no one had found him before then—he didn't want to be found. desperately, in fact.
but niki, too, was desperate. he enacted a ritual that was said (by jake, so of course it was to be trusted) to wake any vampire that had gone into hibernation, and, miracles continuing to work for the bitter young boy, it worked. heeseung awoke—startled to find himself staring into the face of a very teary, very angry (visibly) sixteen-year-old.
confusion passed, things and motives were explained, and heeseung (although bitter at having been woken up, and still riddled with enough guilt to last 1500 lifetimes) attempted to patiently tell niki that he had no fucking idea how to help sunghoon whatsoever. niki pretty much said "well you better fucking find a way because you're not going back to sleep now, the world's about to fucking end. also jay and jungwon-hyung have been looking for you for literal centuries, do you know how pissed theyd be if i went out looking for you, found you, then came back empty-handed? really fucking pissed is how much. also sad. did i mention sad?" and heeseung, notoriously weak and also kind of (read: very) in love, is just like "...jungwon? jay?"
so niki brings heeseung back to the others, the return journey taking a long enough time that the two become significantly close to each other, heeseung's long-forgotten big brother instincts (tm) kicking in around the younger vampire. niki has to basically drag heeseung out of the castle by his teeth, because as much as he misses his brother and jungwon, he's still so incredibly guilty, and completely convinced that he isnt worth love or life whatsoever and that jay still hates his guts. and, jungwon... he doesn't even want to think about jungwon. how he failed him. how he let him down. but, niki slowly works through the insecurities, bit by bit: assuring heeseung that, no, even though jay will definitely rip him a new one once he sees him again, he'll also cry and hug him for at least 24 hours because he misses him like hell and heeseungie hyung you have no idea.
they weather a lot together. storms, mental breakdowns, bouts of blood-starvation so severe heeseung thinks he'll lose it again: but they're there for each other. they hunt, talk, keep each other warm, and in it, form an unbreakable bond. niki had heard tales of the legendary lee heeseung, who wiped out entire armies in two seconds flat and comforted his friends when they were sad and annoyed jay to the very ends of the earth: but what he's faced with is a man with more insecurities than niki has hairs on his head—and he has a lot of hairs on his head.
by the time they make it back to the coven's home, heeseung has grown sufficiently attached to the enigma that is niki, and has almost completely but it out of his mind that he's here for his old friends, too. he's only doing this for niki: it's a fact he's comfortable with. so when they reach the front steps he just... freezes.
i have a very clear image of it in my head—jungwon, jay, and jake sense niki's presence, in some weird vampire-y way. it's been around 10, 15 years since he left at this point, so of course they rush out to greet him, ready with scoldings and lashings about how stupid he had been (after, of course, making sure he's unharmed and alright)—but it all dies on their tongues as soon as they see who's with him.
frozen. everything is frozen.
i imagine it's a lot like lulu and artzyy's post. jungwon is the first to move, stepping forward and whimpering out a broken "hyung", and all heeseung's guilt and avoidance is forgotten in favor of cradling jungwon to his chest, holding him close and whispering reassurances into the crown of his head, wonnie, im so sorry, hyung's so sorry; i didn't mean to leave you for so long, i'm here now, its okay. and of course then jay comes in, crying and screaming about how the fuck is it okay, how can it ever be okay, how could you just not mean to leave us alone for 1500 years?! how the fuck do you just expect to waltz back into our lives like nothing ever happened and pretend its all okay?!? and then he hits him, and hurts him, tries to make him feel even an inkling of the hurt he was made to feel for the past fifteen hundred years—but then punching him turns into fisting hands into the back of his shirt and sobbing into his neck and holding him so tight he wouldn't be able to breath if he had the need to and please, please don't leave, why would you leave, you asshole, why did you leave?
so yeah. things happen. reunions are had, tears are shed. some indirect heewon love confessions probably happen later on in the form of very intense devotions of life and self and all that. "walking on the single-log bridge in the dark really isnt so bad" you know the whole shbang. meanwhile jay salty in the background just like "cant you just say you love each other like normal human beings jesus fucking christ"
jayseung's relationship (or the reigniting of it) is, well, rocky. they're both conflicted—jay even more than heeseung. because, the thing is, heeseung killed sunoo. as regretful as he is, that doesn't make it any easier to forget. but he's back, and alive, and in one piece, and he isn't leaving, and jay knows it wasn't really his fault, he wasn't in control—but he killed him. he killed their brother. and it WAS his own stupid fault for losing control in the first place, for not listening to jungwon, so what the hell is jay supposed to think? he flip-flops between being intensely grateful that heeseung is back and okay and finally with them again, and then remembering what he's done, giving him the cold shoulder and not speaking to him for hours on end. and all the while, heeseung is riddled with guilt, and shame, and grief he'd suppressed for far too long; niki's stubbornness combined with jungwon's unwavering support being the only things keeping him from bolting into oblivion all over again. all in all, it's a difficult time—but they get there. eventually.
naturally, they save sunghoon. what else is there to do? they defeat the queen, break her control over their friend—and then jakehoon have their own teary reunion, not unlike heewon's, and sungki have theirs, not unlike jayseung's (although with a... considerable decrease in cursing and conflicted emotions, and a lot more immediate sobbing). they're a mess—sunghoon is traumatized, heeseung is traumatized, jay and niki are traumatized, they're all just fucking traumatized. jayseung will probably take a long time to get back to the way they once were, if it's even possible—there'll always be an empty space there, something gone, something missing, and it's one that can't be filled. jungwon barely lets heeseung out of sight or touch alike, and heeseung isn't much better off. jay's always been the more touchy one out of the three of them; but after years of missing, of longing, there's plenty of time to be made up, and heeseung is just... so, so soft, and warm, and being held by him is the loveliest thing jungwon's ever known.
AND NOW A SUNOO THING, BECAUSE THE IDEA OF ENHA LIVING HAPPILY EVER AFTER AS OT6 WITH SUNOO JUST FUCKING DEAD DOES. NOT WORK FOR ME
so like. sunoo isn't dead, or he doesn't stay dead, or not the soulless-unmoving kind of dead anyway. you know how necromancy and fierce corpses exist in donghua and shit? well they exist here too because fuck you and also i said so. i made myself sad and now im making it happy again goddamnit.
anyway. after he dies, sunoo gets found by the queen, too, and because she's all-powerful and whatnot she fucking necromances him—figures he'll be useful later. as he is, though, he's basically nothing more than a puppet; like wen ning and song lan were when they were being controlled. his soul isn't... gone exactly, just imprisoned, prevented from being able to come forward and command his body.
so. sunoo is still partially alive, and the boys (jay, jake, jungwon, sunghoon, niki, and whatnot)... don't know that. i imagine that for pretty much the entirety of the centuries that heeseung is gone, sunoo's status as a necromanced fierce corpse goes entirely unknown to them, and it's only after heeseung is brought back by niki that he starts to resurface. i imagine they realize it in a sort of tense, action-filled scenario: the boys have gone to investigate another attack, thinking it's sunghoon, but as it turns out the queen has had TWO undead corpses running around doing her dirty work instead of one. and one of them is sunoo.
heeseung and jay, of course, are stunned. they cant believe it's real; it isn't real, it can't be—and yet.
a lot of angsty plot stuff happens—i dont have the energy or enough shits to give to figure out what. the thing is, the queen only kept sunoo this long and brought him out as a tactic to lure heeseung, make him weaker; and it probably worked. in the midst of both fighting against sunghoon and fighting to SAVE sunghoon, heeseung is bent on saving sunoo as well, and there's probably a lot of very angsty talk wherein there are disagreements about who's life, really, is more important in this situation, and if heeseung is just trying to make up for what he did to sunoo. regardless, heeseung ends up saving sunoo and bringing his soul back to the surface. what he doesn't expect is for sunoo to forgive him—fully and wholeheartedly. and it feels wrong, because no, you should be angry with me, you should hate me and want to hurt me like i hurt you; but sunoo is just... happy. happy that he's back, happy that heeseung is back, happy that they're all together again. and its conflicting, to say the least. even moreso because sunoo isnt stupid—he didnt just act like heeseung was an innocent who did no wrong; he knew he had been wreckless, knew he was at fault, and he forgave him still. loved him still. that was something heeseung... hadn't been prepared for.
like i said in the last part, they save sunghoon; how, im not sure, but they save him, probably with a fair bit of sunoo's help, and they're together again. only the tiny difference here is that sunoo is with them too. sunoo is back, and the gang has yet another undead bestie to teach the ropes of being a vampire to. things are awkward, obviously, especially between the original brother's trio of heeseung, sunoo, and jay; because sunoo is his usual sweet and kind self while jay believes that he should be more angry at heeseung for killing him, heeseung agrees, and jay has some very conflicted feelings about how self-depricating his hyung is being (because like... yeah you killed sunoo and im supposed to hate you but you're not supposed to hate yourself, you idiot, what the fuck?)
(also like. if we're gonna take some more crumbs from cql canon here im gonna go ahead and say sunoo's death was at least somewhat self-sacrificial, even if it was heeseung that ended up causing it in the end)
(i kind of love how jiang cheng-y i made enhaverse jay here to be honest)
(okay this has been in my drafts WAY too long because ive been waiting for some miraculous Other Detail i need to add to pop up in my mind, but honestly i can just add anything else i think of in a reblog afterwards, this bitch just needs to see the light of day)
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phoenixharp-05 · 2 years ago
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okay so ive been thinking about this all day and...i feel like wang yi would most likely not let bai mo be the one to 'save everyone' because she wasn't at the scene of the crash so her time traveling would have to go back far enough and she'd somehow have to stop the accident on a college field trip she wasnt a part of which of course wang yi would have to explain to her first (and at that point, the butterfly effect would make things sort of...wack. this is why i hate time travel lol). also, does time reversal also make anyone not using it lose their memories of that time?? would wang yi be automatically ripped out of the system in that case? so if qin xian came to his world in that scenario, wang yi would know nothing about their various meetings which is....angsty to say the least (of course, might not happen that way but a fan can fan-tasize)
also, i know bai mo is clearly speeding through and there are the readers to be accounted for (which i dont think has been brought up since the first world...) but there might be the possibility that her system's function is different from wang yi's. wang yi's goal is to become the smart but suddenly stupid villain for the happy ending of the protagonists, but bai mo *is* the protagonist in these stories so whats her system's purpose? logically the protagonists just have to respond normally. since she passed her first worlds with little trouble though, even while screwing over the mls, i think it is fair to say she has more leeway with plot changes. for a revenge/change the story to not be cliche and kinda dumb type system, she would do very well. her wanting to rush through the story kinda proves that its working fine in the points department id say. it looks like her system is one that can ignore romantic subplots because we really cant say she has been trying any flirting so far
about wang yi having to stay in role and the punishments, I went back to look and it seems that as the villain who needs to be a proper antagonist, he also needs the overall plot to work (even when he is entirely out of the story?) which conflicts with bai mo's style of screwing everything and everyone over since she wouldnt romance qin xian but wang yi needs her to for the plot to work just like how the 1st world fl and qin xian had to fall in love *and* wang yi had to bully qin xian and get his identity exposed... thus bai mo and qin xian would have to pretend to like each other for wang yi's sake or wang yi would have to pretend to be bai mo, in front of bai mo, to flirt with qin xian.....it really is the most wackass love triangle that isnt a love triangle haha (also, i dont think this qin xian knows about the punishment system, because wang yi hasnt been punished in this world. i know qin xian's theory in ch74 makes a lot of sense from the pov of bai mo who seemingly only has to "win" in the end but qin xian says something like wang yi will be "abandoned" by the system for not completing the task [supposedly of brainwashing bai mo and not dying at the correct time] which almost definitely means punishment in actuality; and supposedly the punishments are going to only get worse the more mistakes wang yi makes though honestly, qin xian's healing ability and fcked up tendencies make me think he might just ignore that anyways)
but concerning that and the "readers" it is somewhat unclear but like. can they choose when they are playing the scene? is it only when the systems are watching?? i recall wang yi was nice to the fl in the first world at the start, though maybe the og wang yi of that world just wasnt a jerk to little girls so it didnt matter. though qin xian saying the fl couldnt visit wang yi while he was injured in that world seems to show that there are certain requirements for an interaction to count. i think wang yi could get away with working with bai mo since he was supposed to bring her to his side via brainwashing anyways though. its really just our fcked up ml thats the problem haha
also, i just remembered that the current bai mo shouldnt know that qin xian likes wang yi? uhh wonder how thatll work out
although as you said if they meet bai mo again later and qin xian reads her mind, if they really dont recognize qin xian again it wont be a problem but if they do....then qin xian might know a version of "him" fell in love with wang yi which honestly if it were me would only make me less likely to actually fall in love with that person, mostly because of spite
really wonder how the story is going to continue from here considering Bai Mo's goal is obviously to get Wang Yi back. She and Qin Xian will probably clash right?
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aprito · 4 years ago
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hello <3 since i got these asks at the same time i decided to combine my thoughts on them in this post. yet another annoying sjw essay from yours truly on this blog 
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before i get into these i think i need to preface why im like. i guess overly hyperfocused on a certain unproblematic base (same age au / platonic canon) for them and avoid the ped0philic content like the plague lol
tw for pedophilia ment, rape ment if that makes you squicky. ALSO THIS IS LONG AND RAMBLY
as i’ve mentioned a couple times already, ive been into the ship since i was 12, back when it was very very common to not only post untagged (nsfw) canonverse content of the two in writing and in drawing but also non con and the like, so you can imagine how bad my first impression online was. thinking back on it ...as a child i found it disturbing but didnt really register how problematic it really was?? (i know, but i also lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one explain this to me) 
skip to 2014 aka me coming back to naruto at 17ish and i had kinda become hyper aware of the fact that there was an increasing amount of people online who had come forward with explaining how fictional problematic content, mostly pedophilia, had been used to groom them into starting relationships with adullts. it was also a time where a lot of people didnt believe these victims, not registering how common it was for minors to be online friends with adults who had no boundaries and no qualms exposing them such content. not gonna get into my personal life here but i was lucky to not having gone through this myself. like... it kinda was my first time truly realising how fiction can EASILY be used to manipulate others irl (and yes i will not argue this, if you dont think fictional media can form and manipulate people’s opinions on attitudes, countries, cultures and virtues, pick up a book about the effects of propaganda media at least once please) 
i, being young, still liking the dynamic but not really the romance, would point this out here and there in the fandom and get into fights with grown adults in their mid 20s who assumed i automatically hated the ship(s) and tried to restrict their freedom of speech or whatever, heard everything from the “age of consent doesnt exist in naruto” to the “sasori looks like a child what does it matter” despite people clearly playing on him being older and experienced. it made me so upset that people were just consuming all this content uncritically and exposing children to it tbh?? not really just sos but a lot of minor/adult ships in naruto in general. and thats where i sat down and thought, i do not want to be a grown adult talking down to children that point out how unsafe the fandom is. theyre absolutely right in drawing these boundaries and calling out adults who defend the uncritical consumption and creation of this content. i do not want to consume or create content that predators could use to groom minors, and i absolutely do want to let younger people in fandom know that i am respecting their comfort zones and want them to have a safe and fun experience. after all, naruto is not an adult show and i think a lot of people forget that!!!! i am not perfect in that regard but its something that i, at the age of 23, am very passionate about and strive towards to.
and i guess thats where same age au was born for me and i have been sticking to it ever since. 
so finally we can move to the first question 
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aside from the fact that we both dont like canon sos, i dont think it would work out even if i wasnt prejudiced to it anyways. in all honesty, 35 year old canon sasori is not a redeemable character to me, given the fact that he’s easily amongst the cruelest villains in naruto (torturing and killing and taxiderming people for his own fun personal gain, never for a goal that served anyone but himself. how do you redeem having over 300 corpses in your backpack that you felt absolutely no remorse for killing). sasori was legit one of the only cruel villains that didnt had someone else pull the strings, which sends a clear message on kishi’s part, who absolutely loves to redeem villains LOL.
being that old, he obviously had already been very manifested in what he believed in, even if it was shakey, to the point where the first crack in that world view (sakura and chiyo protecting each other) immediately had him give up on his life all together. that, in my opinion, is not a man who’s going to know what healthy relationships would look like, regardless of it being romantic or not. 35 year old sasori to me has the same appeal as an expired can of tuna and he’s probably very happy 6 feet under. he’s supposed to be a failed gaara in that sense that he had no one to look out for him and therefore was never going to experience anything but a bad ending in life. its fine that hes dead honestly, it wraps up his short character development the best IMO.
adding to that, seriously, sakura was obviously interested in knowing why he was that way, and called him out for being seriously fucked in the head, but it’s weird to me that people assume she had any interest in actively rehabilitating him, let alone starting a serious romantic relationship with him. sakura who’s not only very, uhm, immature and straight forward when it comes to her romantic viewpoints also, as a big bootlicker, wouldnt soil her standing in the village by starting anything with a disgraced and far too gone criminal like sasori. shipping that version of sasori with sakura intimately is still going to set her up for a huge power imbalance that would be difficult to handle imo, even if she was the one in the fight ultimately exerting her power over him. i would still look at it and think damn she deserves better than having to play therapist for man like that lol.
additionally, even if you ignored all of this, you cant really ignore that sasori had already known her as a child, and that had been his first and most impactful impression of her. i dont think that sasori would look at 35 year old sakura and see her as a grown woman and not the little green girl she was in the fight. plus, you easily fall into predatory comparison territory between the “childish” and “womanly” and i have seen way too often in fic just being boiled down to her now being fuckable. a lot of of ships do this and i would just like to remind yall thats it not normal for adults to want to start relationships with children they have seen grown up or known as a child when they themselves were fully grown adults. therefore, maybe if sakura hadnt met sasori before it would be less of a problem? but that also obviously defeats the point of the dynamic and the reason he died in the first place. so yeah, it sounds kind of doomed especially if you were to make it romantic. 
WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE SECOND QUESTION
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let me preface this that im not fundamentally against age gaps, even if im not super interested in it. after all, colorblind had a 5 yr age gap (with sakura being 21), even if, say, i wrote similar fics today i probably would make it smaller lol. i think it can be handled well if both parties have enough life experience to deal with it, and the author is cautious of where the age gap starts, i think a 10+ year age gap would be fine in a scenario where the younger party (i guess sakura) was at least 25-27ish, meaning she has completed most of her most formative life stages and probably had been in relationships before, meaning she would be able to handle it without having to fear a huge power imbalance. the older the younger party is the less the age gap is going to matter tbh .TsukiHoshino and AngelOfDeath10 both handle age gaps in their fics really well imo, so i do not mind reading about them.
unfortunately, a lot of people in this fandom think making sakura barely "”””legal””””” (18, not even 20 which is hilarious to me because the source material is obviously japanese) because they both cannot stand her being past her “prime years” of being young fertile and fuckable to much older men as well as thinking a 20 year old is automatically old enough to handle that type of relationship. ive seen a lot of unironic takes that believe it will absolve them of callout posts if they throw around age of consent and “shes 18 now suckers!!!” enough lmfao. absolutely hilarious. aging a minor up without aging the adult down seriously reeks of predatory “cant wait until youre 18″ narratives and thats why i find it similarly disturbing as straight up pedo shipping.
ultimately, sasosaku is and will always be a inherently problematic ship in canon, which is why i think it should always be handled a little more responsibly in fandom spaces, ignoring or outright excusing the main problem factor, which is sasori, isnt going to convince anyone that the dynamic in itself is well written and interesting enough to explore in aus, like giving sasori the redemption most of us wanted him to have by aging him down to a point in time where he was still realistically going to allow being positively influenced, similar to gaara. 
so really, what i think is well handled age gap and how most people handle age gap in the naruto fandom are two different worlds at times lol 
tl;dr
canon shippers have never been anything but gross when i was younger and i didnt wanna be like that, even if youre “smart”enough to differenate, actual creeps dont really care and might use your content to blur the lines, sasori isnt rly redeemable so romantic canonverse realistically wouldnt make much sense and is still iffy, age gaps are fine if they are handled well, but given that the dynamic doesnt really need the age gap to still work im not that invested on making that an essential part of my shipping experience.  
thank you for reading and hope this makes sense!
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yellowbluemoonshine · 4 years ago
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Spinner & Spinaraki
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Thanks for question, anon.
I didnt have much thoughts at first but now, i got. So i will write the things in my mind and i agree. Spinaraki is a underrated ship/relationship.
I will talk about Spinner’s character, Spinaraki and what might happen in future with Spinner under the cut.
About Spinner’s character;
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He literally showed those swords to make himself look powerfull. When we first sax him, he completely looks like empty, in scene when he talks about Stain’s will, even his eyes arent seen like he is like an empty fanboy.
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We know that he felt empty for a long time. He probably became an outcast cause of his weak and mutant quirk. He is a young man who couldnt find anything enjoy in his life. He probably didnt really close to anyone that much and he didnt have a job despite being an adult, this is why he end up becoming a neet.
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He keeps talking about games cause during his empty life, thats all he did. He didnt really meet or interact with people, real world, this is why he treat real world as games cause he cant handle real world, like others. He wasnt in real world for a long time after all.
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Spinner doesnt look like “exteremely” traumatized like Shigaraki or Twice etc. He is also the second sane character in league, after Mr Compress. He is also not “i want family-friend guy” so probably he didnt feel the loneliness that Toga and Twice felt.
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I think his family didnt die or he wasnt emotionally abused the way way Toga was with her parents but he doesnt seem to close his family either. Maybe they thought Spinner is useless for being a neet and doing nothing all the time.
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He might not be clever or powerfull but he is the one who looks after things in league. When Dabi asked Twice’s condition, Spinner is the one who answers it. When Toga asked Shigaraki’s reason to wearing another hand, Spinner is the one who is answering it. He is the one who joined the meeting with metahuman liberation with Mr Compress to take care of things. When Gigatomachia came, Mr Compress asked what happened to Spinner. So from outside, Spinner might look like doing nothing but thats not true.
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If Shigaraki is the leader/boss, Spinner is the supporter/secretary, the person who will take care of things for leader so leader can focus on important things.
Spinaraki;
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We didnt see how they meet but at first, they both didnt care about each other at all. Shigaraki didnt really care about what will happen to the people he sent to camp and Spinner saved Deku, despite Shigaraki said them to kill him. He came here for Stain but more importantly to change things.
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Spinner may start emphatizing with Shigaraki before than we thought. Like the moment when he saw Shigaraki’s room. Thats probably the time he realized how much similar they both are.
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Then this is probably why in overhaul arc, he did what Shigaraki said, despite it doesnt seem to have anything to do with Stain.
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Then, time goes, Spinner kept watching Shigaraki and he decided to call him out cause from outside, he doest seem to doing anyting. This why Spinner called him out and told how he feels.
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Shigaraki is the only one who truly listened Spinner’s story and understood his feelings, the others looks like whether they dont care or dont understand. It’s hard to understand that “emptyness”, if yourself didnt experience it after all.
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Every league member wants something from Shigaraki. Toga wanted freedom, Shigaraki gave it. Twice wanted friedship,care, Shigaraki gave it. etc. Spinner wants a future, he wants that the things he does will have meaning, he wants better future.
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All of those requests are important cause Shigaraki himself is confused about what he truly wants to do. After all, he is living his life as AFO’s thing. Unlike Shigaraki, league members know what they want in life but Shigaraki doesnt so when they asked them, he is choosing to listen and decide what he wants to do, what kind of person he wants to be.
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Thats why when Spinner opened himself to Shigaraki, Shigaraki also decided to open himself again to league. He talked about his past and how he felt empty, just like Spinner. They might have different lifes and all but that emptyness they felt is the common thing they have. They both find nothing to enjoy in life.
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And thats the moment Shigaraki won Spinner’s hearth. And it was mentioned by someone else, in this panel, Spinner is the only one who look at Shigaraki’s himself. Others either they dont care or they dont understand. Unlike others, Shigaraki and Spinner both understand each others in deeper levels.
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Like Toga and Twice became best friends cause they emphatized with each others and they saw theirselves in each other. Their common point was lonelyness, they both want just someone to trust them. Thats why they were good friends cause they both understood each others in deeper levels. Shigaraki and Spinner also emphatized each others and they saw theirselves in each others. Its like; if Twice is Toga’s bestfriend, Spinner is Shigaraki’s bestfriend.
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This is why i always thought they would be bestfriends, if little Spinner met with Tenko before. Tenko definitely would be friends with him and league cause Spinner probably need someone like Tenko in his life. He was bullied cause of his quirk and he probably wouldnt end up like this, if he had someone like Tenko in his life.
(I think all league, people like league, outcast need Tenko but especially Spinner and Toga needed Tenko in their life.)
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And it was so nice to see that they both asked each other’s opinions about condition. Spinner isnt really the caretaker of the group (thats mostly Mr Compress’s job) but he specifically focus on Shigaraki and his work
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so he can help him to carry his burden cause Shigaraki definitely needs someone like him in his life, someone specificially will focus on him so he will be fine. Also thanks to Shigaraki’s existence/the way he treats him, Spinner become an invidual, a person. He got the power to do something, even its for someone else. And someone is also care about Spinner as person and thats precious, especially for outcasts.
(Hoping, one day league can understand that Shigaraki self destructs and stop him and save him cause he needs it.)
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Botn Shigaraki and Spinner cant fight for theirselves cause they both feel empty, worthless. This is why Spinner wants to help Shigaraki, Spinner wants to heal and want a better future.
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UnLike Spinner, Shigaraki doesnt have any hope for future, he thinks that he doesnt deserve to have a future or healing but since his comprade request him, at least he will try to give a future to them so people like them can live life how they see fit. Even Shigaraki cant wish a future for himself, he will wish it for others.Thats literally how Shigaraki’s “villain academia” end.
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Thats why  the horizon that created by Shigaraki seemed beatifull to Spinner, he felt that things are changing, Shigaraki is opening a new door that will change the world.
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This is why Shigaraki’s goals are not just destruction and he wants to be more than being AFO’s thing. The connection he had with his comprades made him better person/Tenko started to appear cause he didnt close himself to others The empathy between league is what saving them and the person who made league that way is Shigaraki, their hero.
What might happen with Spinner in the future?
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I think we might get an arc about racism cause we need one. And we definitely might see parallels between him and Shigaraki again.
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So we will learn more about his past and eventually, i think he will need to meet with Stain. I think he will give up on Stain cause Stain is not like Shigaraki. I dont think any of Shigaraki’s comprades would like Stain’s himself cause Stain is someone who blindly believes in system and you can be Stain’s enemy in any second, you know what i mean if you read vigilantes.
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I have a feeling that Spinner might die in some point, just like Twice and maybe his death might change Shigaraki’s idea about future, maybe he can learn how to live too. Like spinner’s last request might be Shigaraki’s being alive or sometihng like “dont give up on future” or something. I hope (i hoped this for Twice’s too) Spinner wont die though and league can be ok, even in the end.
Extra;
You might look at those analysis.
Shigaraki-Spinner parallels;
https://linkspooky.tumblr.com/post/188765417810/spinner-shigaraki-two-neets
Spinaraki;
https://thevoidable.tumblr.com/post/622428681400401920/why-spinaraki-is-an-underrated-gem-of-a-ship
There might things that i forgot to mention but for now thats it.
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a-merman-not-a-guppy · 5 years ago
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It will be alright, alright, alright | Carrotflakes
Finn reaches out to Nemo and Tae after an argument with Ariel. The conversation sort of devolves from there. Talk of prom, goats, etc. Group chats man.
@justkeepdancing-nemo​ @moon-yeongtae​
Finn: hi Nemo! hi Tae! I hope it's not weird to put us all together in a chat like this.
Finn: it might be weird Nemo: course its not weird ahah we've group chatted before :heart: Finn: :heart: Finn: I want to ask you guys Finn: well I want to talk Nemo: yeah? whats up!
Finn: i got in a fight with Ariel? Finn: i mean not physically Finn: though she did. got in a physical fight Finn: with ASHLEY A! Nemo: ohhhhh yeah i heard Nemo: at mei's party right??? Nemo: but wait why did u fight ariel then Finn: everyone's heard. Finn: well she just Finn: she's just so Finn: reckless? i mean she told me not to panic Finn: and I know I panic a lot okay. but whenever she says that I swear my heart rate picks up ten times because I know something's happened Finn: and that she's gonna be super casual about it and laugh about it while I have my tenth heart attack of the year Nemo: oh i see Nemo: she's not taking your worry seriously, thats why? Finn: I guess? I mean she never does really. Which I get kind of. Finn: I worry about everything. I know that. Finn: but the ashleys are really awful and I'll cry if they do something awful to her. Finn: I mean it's one thing if it's me, I mean I get it and I'm used to it. but she's my best friend Nemo: :/ ok well she should take your worries seriously Nemo: i get why you'd be upset over that Nemo: and the ashleys arent a joke! they seriously messed with robbie for months under everyone's noses Finn: I've never fought with her before! But this is so... Finn: god and Robbie! Finn: she talked about how you and Robbie were in the burn book too and were 'doing okay' and acting like none of what the Ashleys do is a big deal. Finn: I reminded her of what they did to me and she said it was more reason to stand up and fight them! Finn: I wouldn't ask anyone to do that! Nemo: i mean i think it is important to stand up... i dunno about fight... Nemo: i just mean that we cant let the ashleys rule our lives but yeah purposefully antagonizing them is bad haha why sneak into a falcon's nest you know! Finn: they've ruled my life for years so I guess it's hard for me to even think about that. Finn: i don't want them antagonized and doing awful things to you or to robbie or to ariel. Nemo: :/ Nemo: i mean i get where ariel is coming from Nemo: and you too Nemo: is she really planning to...uh...fight more? what would that even mean? didnt she like punch ashley a or something Finn: I don't know. I think so? Finn: she didn't give me details which made me a little more suspicious but after I reminded her about what the ashleys did she said Finn: ' Youre only giving me more reasons to stand up to them and not let them get away with all of that' Finn: and Finn: 'I cant just stand by anymore and im sorry if that makes you upset and that i didnt do something sooner' Finn: i'd rather be homeschooled again than be the excuse to pick more fights Nemo: aw jingles i hope she isnt gonna involve you Nemo [deleted]: i already feel like i made you a target as it is D: sdlfkajs Nemo: maybe give it a day?? she could calm down! maybe it wont seem so important anymore Nemo: to her, i mean Finn: I asked her not to but there's really no telling with her sometimes. Finn: she really makes rash decisions! Finn: i hope she will but I don't think so. And now we're not talking so I don't know what I'm gonna do Finn: besides maybe idk Finn: do you think Tae would make sure Ariel stays safe? I could make cookies Nemo: course he would but Nemo: ...i dunno if ariel would uh, like that Nemo: i dont know much about her but from everything you're telling me i mean Nemo: though maybe she could eat lunch with us if that would make you feel better! Nemo: except ur fighting Nemo: well after you make up! Nemo: though maybe having three burn book victims in one place is a bad call.... Nemo: hm Nemo: hold on let me think ahah Finn: I just want her to be safe. But I guess you're probably right. she'd hate it Finn: and I feel stupid for not being able to do anything to keep her safe either Nemo: well no matter what we would ALL be there for her if she needs it Finn: I'm so lucky to know you guys. Nemo: im so lucky i know you finn :heart: Nemo: im sorry there's more ashley drama ugh Nemo: if i could go back to new years eve and do it all over again i really would Finn: there's always drama with the ashleys. Finn: next year they're gone though from school! and then it'll be fine! it'll be good. Finn: but I wouldn't change New Years Eve. I did something I'd never do otherwise and I had a lot of fun with my friends before everything Finn: Ashley A can...she can....ugh I can't insult her yet not even like this Finn: but you know what I probably mean Nemo: i can Nemo: she's a wartface who can choke on tree fungus Nemo: and ashleigh q is a literal monster who needs to be exorcised from the planet Finn: I can't believe I giggled at that. Finn: that's a very unique insult Nemo: ii got plenty more where that came from! Nemo: but i  will keep them to myself and this group chat!
Finn: hahaha that's probably smart. No need to cause more fights. Nemo: all i wanna do iis get through school without getting grounded again im really trying not to get into trouble lol Finn: a good goal to have too. Finn: it'll be fine. We've all got each other. It should be. Yeah. Nemo: yeah! Tae: I CANT BELIEVE I WAS WORKING Tae: ARIEL FOUGHT ASHLEY A? Nemo: omg u didnt hear yet?? Tae: no I was in Jun's all work and no play orbit Nemo: lol did he take ur phone again Tae: yes next time I'm gonna axe murder him Tae: THE POINT IS THAT ARIEL KICKED ASHLEYS ASS YAAAAAAAAY Tae: sorry I hate her Nemo: join the club aha Tae: I can't believe he took my phone at such a critical time I'm gonna point to this as an example that u cant just take a teens phone bc their friends might need them Nemo: well the fight happened like a day ago Tae: does he have to know that? Tae: no Nemo: i dont think this is a very convincing argument anyway tae yah Nemo: say someone was dying Tae: right yes also I'm really sorry finn Tae: I'll protect ariel Tae: if I can Nemo: just dont get in trouble yourself Nemo: can we all try not to get in trouble??? Nemo: we gotta go to prom in a couple of months ago we need CLEAN RECORDS Tae: sometimes trouble just finds u neems did John mcclane ask for trouble Nemo: (prom is real right thats not just in movies..........) Tae: prom is a real (stupid) thing yes Nemo: tae yah u r going to prom Nemo: sorry not sorry Tae: I dont have a suit and we are poor I cant go Nemo: i dont have a suit and im even more poor and im still gonna go Nemo: i bet you can wear jun's suit Tae: jun is an oddly proportioned dorito Nemo: and you're not??? Finn: pfft Finn: I'm not going to prom Tae: I am a beefcake with angelic proportions thank you very much Finn: oh god Finn: no Finn: i mean respectfully Finn: no Tae: wow rude
Nemo: what!!! finnyyy you gotta Nemo: we'll all go together Finn: please no Nemo: D: Nemo: but why not? Nemo: its not an ashley party, its school sanctioned Nemo: there will be chaperones right? Finn: yeah but they'll be there Finn: they have to to get their devil horns Finn: i mean crown Nemo: but there will be grown ups! Nemo: also lol Tae: we could carrie them Nemo: no Finn: isn't that the scary thing with blood?
Nemo: we'll just mind our own business ok Tae: :))))))))) Nemo: we'll dance and eat food and look fit in our suits and be home before 10 because thats my curfew it will be so lame and fun! Finn: alternative plan: we could not go and have an anti prom hang out Nemo: but i wanna go to prom :/ Finn: oh. that's not fair Nemo Finn: i can picture your sad face Nemo: :(((((((((((((((((((((((((( Tae: you cant go with us anyway nemo u have to go with rooooooobbbbbbieeeeeee Finn: NEMOOOOO DDDD= Finn: that's true too Tae: finn do u wanna be my date? I'll fight everyone for u Nemo: i wanna go with YOU LOT TOO Nemo: c'mon Nemo: i wanna do the big group thing Finn: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Nemo: we have to go to prom at least once Finn: remember the last party we went to? Finn: it can't be that soon to be forgotten Nemo: if not this year then next year when the ashleys arent at school??? Tae: I cant believe I just put my WHOLE HEART ON THE LINE and finn ignored me ya_bae_nemo [this is a snapchat]: 
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Finn: WAIT I'M SORRY Finn: TAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Finn: dgpsodjpgojgspdgjdsg Nemo: i meani really wont make you guys go if you dont want Finn: if i were a prom person i would definitely go with you tae of course Finn: wait Finn: why do i have to feel GUILTY Finn: meanies Tae: nemo I'm asking for a date shut ur mouth Nemo: sorry i just realized i was doing the same thing i did at new years!! Nemo: im the worst lol Finn: omg NO Finn: no you're NOT Nemo: nevermind nevermind we'll do anti prom this year that sounds fun too Finn: stooooop it right there Nemo: seriously you're right anti prom could be cool Finn: Nemo Nemo: i mean it! Finn: Nemo: i could go to prom prom next year! Finn: 
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Finn: stop Nemo: WHAT Finn: ugh i don't wanna fight with more than one friend today and Finn: who's to say prom wouldn't be fun if Finn: and ONLY IF Finn: Mr. Hot Date over there doesn't leave for another hot date ever Finn: during the time of this Nemo: we arent fighting Finn: it feels like we could and i don't wanna make you sad Tae: I'll stay by your side the whole time Finn: wow Nemo: no im not sad at all Nemo: you arent making me sad Finn: you sure? Tae: only bc u called me hot ;) Nemo: its too early to be talking about it anyway!! who knows maybe robbie will dump me and i'll be too depressed to go to prom lol Finn: omg. you're both going to kill me Finn: here lies Finn Finn: rip Finn: and if Robbie ever dumps you Finn: he'd be the BIGGEST IDIOT ON THE PLANET Tae: nemo u r literally so dramatic ok robbie is so far up ur ass hes like coming out ur throat Finn: that's gross tae Nemo: im just saying its literally three months away Tae: WHERE IS THE LIE FINN Finn: too vivid a mental picture Tae: what's our color scheme picasso Nemo: the theme hasnt even been announced Nemo: u cant decide that yet tae yah c'mon even i know that Finn: can i make our clothes? Tae: oh hell yes you can Finn: :heart:
Tae: also nemo u can always decide first if ur not a coward cmon Nemo: i think the theme makes it fun Tae: ok fine ur right bc I could be something cool like die hard then I could wear a tank top and no shoes Nemo: id just go shirtless Finn: nooooooo Nemo: rub myself up in blood and oil Tae: hahahaha Finn: sounds like the most terrifying form of prom Nemo: its HOT Finn: blood and oil? Finn: gross Tae: yeah Finn it's for the aesthetic Nemo: its so i can take out the germans Finn: ...... Finn: what Tae: have you never seen die hard either Finn: no? Nemo: omg you dont know my husband john mcclane!!! Tae: do I have to do all the work around here Finn: i guess so Finn: you've never invited me for a movie night this isn't my fault DDD= Tae: nemo we have to make him watch die hard with us Nemo: duh! Finn: is it a scary movie? Nemo: yes Nemo: but cool Tae: no Finn: .... Nemo: there's guns and stuff Nemo: and death Finn: ahhh intense Tae: yeah and a really ineffectual police department Nemo: people die hard lolol Tae: I learned that word today Tae: ineffectual Nemo: i dont even know what that means Nemo: tae yah dont get smarter than me Nemo: its not fair lol Tae: good because I probably used it wrong LMFAO Finn: no Finn: you did fine! Finn: :smile: Nemo: see finn is already smarter than me Tae: jun bought me a word of the day calendar bc I called myself a dumbass last week Finn: wahhhhh Nemo: ahhahaha Tae: so maybe I wont sound like a dumbass while still secretly being the biggest dumbass ever Finn: you are NOT Tae: UNDERCOVER DUMBASS HAHAJAHA Finn: D= Nemo: i'll still sound like a dumbass Finn: DD= Nemo: hopefully i'll be cute enough to make up for it Finn: you guys are making me sadddddddd Nemo: :kissing_heart: Tae: nemo ur the cutest it's ok tell him hes cute finn Nemo: im kidding finn i mean im not super smart or anything but im a fairy so who cares Finn: you're smart and funny and kind and cute? Nemo: oh jingles Nemo: i really wasnt trying Nemo: i didnt mean i mean i really was kidding !! Tae: yeah and I wanna be a cop and if you've seen any movies you dont have to be smart to do that either Nemo: now im blushing Finn: my friends are great! i just wanna hug you guys when you say stuff like that about yourself Finn: and we can talk about pots and kettles but i won't hear it Finn: today at least Nemo: also thats tru tae yah all cops are terrible except for hopefully one day u Nemo: well finny you ARE also smart and funny and kind and cute too Nemo: and kind of a bad ass wow Nemo: i promise i wont call myself a dumbass anymore Finn: i'll try to believe everything but the badass part lol Finn: but good :heart: Finn: YOU TOO TAE Tae: I promise I wont call myself a dumbass out loud anymore Tae: lmfao sorry Finn: -.- Finn: fine i guess Finn: sorry. i just really love you guys a lot Nemo: i love you too :slight_smile: Nemo: tae is just okay :slight_smile: Tae: that's me ok tae Nemo: what we call it Nemo: u Nemo: tae just ok moon Nemo: wow saying it like that was weird Tae: lmfao Finn: tae a great friend moon Finn: moon great friend yeongtae Tae: yeah I hate it too just put moon first white people it's not hard Nemo: omg ok is in tokki Nemo: tOKKi Finn: people should figure out how to say names right though Nemo: mine isnt actually hard im lucky Nemo: people butcher my appa's its awful Tae: tae is easy it's like Taylor's swift Finn: I think they'd butcher mine Nemo: Taelor Swift. Finn: but only my mom and aunt called me it anyway Nemo: tae yah thanks for giving me so many great nicknames for u Finn: taelor swift is good lol Nemo: wait finny u never told me your birth name? Tae: if u call me taelor swift i might kill everyone Nemo: i didnt realize you had one Finn: yeah I don't go by it so most people wouldn't xP Finn: dad said it was 'too hard' to say Finn: and they named me Finn Nemo: yeah i get it i dont go by nammin either Tae: i'm gonna pull a power move and use my goat's name Nemo: omg dont Nemo: tae yahasdfja Finn: isn't the goat just Finn: no wait never mind Nemo: dont get him started Tae: MY GOAT HAS A BEAUTIFUL NAME NEMO Nemo: i know that tae yah Tae: i'll just walk into class one day and pronounce myself Hanuelbyeolimgureumhaennimbodasarangseurouri Nemo: theeeeeeeeeere it is Finn: my eyes Finn: what am i trying to read Nemo: ha nuel byeol im gureum hae nnim bo dae sarang seurouri does that help Finn: i wish it did Tae: HAHAHA it's basically the most genius sibling win ever Tae: i named my goat something that basically means more lovely than the sun sky and stars which are, coincidentally, my sister's names HAHAHAHA Tae: it is my legac Finn: oh my god. i'm a lot slower on trying to read hangul and I got some of it Nemo: it IS pretty hilarious Finn: but not all Finn: wow Nemo: and the goat IS pretty sexy Tae: the sexiest goat Nemo: i want her to call me oppa Tae: HAHAHAHAHA Nemo: >) Finn: oh my god Finn: so is this gonna be Finn: 
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Finn: not judging Finn: lol Nemo: whoa is that a movie about a romance between four men and a goat Nemo: humans are wild Finn: i honestly don't know. I just know this movie exists Tae: that's one i've actually never seen so i can't help Nemo: im gonna believe its a romance between four men and a goat Finn: should we find out? watch die hard and then Finn: a goat movie Nemo: i will watch anything so sure!! Tae: that's true he is a slut for movies Nemo: hey Tae: um i've seen more than u so Tae: i'm the biggest movie slut around Nemo [deleted]: well u werent called a whore so Nemo: lol true Finn: we could do a movie night at my place? Finn: or yours if you want Tae buttttt Tae: no yours is fine Nemo: if its yours i can play with pannieeeee Finn: i was about to brag and show a picture again Finn: i guess i don't have to Finn: xP Nemo: were u gonna show a picture of pannie!!! Nemo: you read my mind!!1 Finn: i mean Pannie is a treasure! i will definitely cuddle him for all scary things! Nemo: guess that means i gotta cuddle tae yah Nemo: sorry tae yah ur stuck with me Finn: guess so. we could both cuddle pannie too, i could share i guess Finn: check this out Finn: 
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Tae: HIS SHIRT Nemo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Finn: he gets to be stylish with me Nemo: U DID NOT Nemo: did u make that! Finn: of course! Tae: there is no way nemo will cuddle me now look at him Finn: well if nemo desperately wants to cuddle pannie i gueeeeess i could cuddle you tae if you're sad Tae: it's okay i'm a big strong man who doesn't need cuddles lmfao Neems: I CANT BELIEVE U MADE THAT Finn: oh. so you don't want to cuddle me? D= Finn: so very sad Finn: nemo cuddle me with pannie Neems: i will cuddle anyone who needs it tae yah knows im a big rotten coward Neems: HE LOOKS LIKE A GENTLEMAN Neems: sorry im still not over it Finn: =DDD Neems: u should make him a little tie :((( id cry Finn: ooooo that's a good idea Finn: i'll make him a black tie so he can feel fancy Finn: or black bow tie? Neems: both! Neems: one for the office one for special occasions duh Tae: tie the tie around his head so he looks like a karate master Finn: i think he'd just chew that off Finn: but i like the creativity Tae: thank u i'll be here my whole life Neems: tae the tie master moon Tae: omg that sound cooler than taelor swift i'll take it Finn: a bit wordy though. TTTMM Tae: just call me tm Tae: traDEMARK BITCHESSSSSS Finn: hahaha
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laurent-ofvere · 5 years ago
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How did you get over your Sensitivities? Idk if this is what you mean but I relate/project too much on Laurent and seeing him in sex scenarios that feel ooc bothers me a lot, I would love to get over that to enjoy all the smut that the Capri fandom has to offer :(
oh yeah thats fully what i mean, it would honestly just put me in a weird mood and make me very blah, and i couldnt get myself to read it if i wanted to. then sensibilities aside, i wouldn't even be able to objectively enjoy it bc for me- i mainly read fic bc i wanna feel like im getting more out of the characters that i enjoy, so when its context that i dont believe would ever happen/i dont think they would ever do or say a certain thing, it just reads extremely flat to me. not in a holier than thou “this is ooc and would never happen, what terrible writing”, way, more so in a “i read fic to read more things they might do, so if i dont feel like they would do that, im simply disinterested” kinda way. its why i still shy away from anything post canon, i truly dont think they’d ever be with anyone else or involve anyone else so its just really unenjoyable for me bc it just defeats the purpose. 
honestly? i dont know how i got over it. im still pretty much like that with damen, i dont really like thinking of him with other people the way laurent/other can sometimes be 🔥🔥 (tho i dont objectively find the concept as appealing as the way i do with laurent regardless so its fine lol) truthfully, i think its just my overall disconnect from fandom and the books. its been a few years and my crazy spark has dwindled, and with the fandom being far less engaging and the mass production of content that once appealed to me having diminished significantly, i just dont feel as tethered. and honestly for me, picturing laurent/them in scenarios i didnt before is actually what helps me feel reengaged and more often sparked, bc it sort of opens new possibilities and outlets whereas everything else feels either ‘been there, done that’ or generally just dull at this point (not that i dont still love lamen in every scenario and i still prefer them to any other pairing etc etc etccc)
if laurent is your tender spot then maybe try removing damen entirely from the universe? like i personally really dont like the idea of damen being an option and laurent (a monogamous, not sleeping around, I'm-looking-for-one-man laurent) choosing someone else. if damen purely isnt an option for laurent then it wont feel, idk, inaccurate that he isnt only with him?
or you can make damen involved in a significant way, just not a focal way. i wrote a thing where laurent wants damen and his sights are entirely set on him in every way, but he wants to be experienced and completely confident with him so he makes an arrangement with lazar and he basically gets all of his sexual experience with him, someone he doesnt actually care that much about but still finds attractive and some kinda draw. but damen is always, always laurents end goal, no question about it.
IDK WHY THIS IS SO LONG IJFNKMC idk man i feel you, and i definitely feel you on wanting to enjoy everything the fandom has to offer. fandom is meant to be fun, but also a comfortable safe place for you. just find your balance! find ways to ease in. maybe just talk to someone about it? throwing headcanons around and dipping your toes in that way can be a good starting point. im always here if you wanna hit me up, even if its just on anon.
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dndfuckhouse · 5 years ago
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Session 19 - your majesty, i present to you the vengaboys
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> 🎵  Pianissimo Epilogue / Silent Hill 2 OST
Returning to our tale, the group have all found respite in Vorde’s temporary abode in Shorewater, resting up and recovering from the night's events. Soon morning comes, though with the curtains shut as they are, it's a bit hard to tell that it's now daylight outside as they all slowly come too.
Peering about the group dont spot Vorde about, supposing he’s still in his room. Feeling a hankering for breakfast, Keva and Psalm wander over to the small dining table in the room and the fruit still piled upon it, chowing down. Psalm continues looking at the tome they stole yesterday as he does, continuing to copy runes and scan for any more information as he does.
Keva: keva is cuttin up an apple into slices with a small knife, giving some to amos and setting some aside and occasionally eating a slice Psalm: i'm just cooling at this breakfast table
Rokka begins his morning stretches, Finn sees this and decides to join him as well, Han watches and secretly does her own stretches, trying to not seem as if she wants to join in.
Plum: WHY Han: issues ! Plum: LMFAO Rokka: did our near death experience not bring us closer
In the meantime Plum and Cimmorro prepare their spells for the day, either via quick study or short prayer. Seemingly done with her stretches, Han comes over and joins the two at the dining table to eat (she hoards some of the food after everyone's had some). As the group go about their activities Orin eventually ambles out of him and Finn’s room somewhat drowsy, he takes a seat at the table next to psalm and takes a bite of an apple.
Psalm: good morning orin Rokka: i am crushing an apple in my mouth whole Orin: "mornin'" he looks like hes about to continue but rokka eating an apple whole makes him go : 0 though he quickly sneaks one of Keva’s slices after. Keva: an apple a day keeps the Chip: cult away Psalm: CLEARLY IT DONT
Han heads over to the window to the balcony briefly and opens the curtain ever so slightly to peer outside, looking down she sees the fenced garden of the building, a few birds flitting about in the branches of trees. Craning her head to try and look at the street she doesn't see anybody around. Out of the corner of his eye Finn sees Han move the curtain slightly and quickly becomes on edge before realising all is fine.
Finn: 
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Han: LKSAD;LKHFLKHAWEFDS Finn: grimaces @ han opening the curtain and moves slightly. Chip: like a cat Finn: yes! Chip: fur raised Finn: KHJSHEJEHLJ
After a time the group hear some shuffling from the door Vorde disappeared behind last night, it slowly creaks open revealing his form. He walks out and looks about the group of them idling about and rubs his eyes turning and walking to the dining table to also grab an AppleTM, he doesn't sit down though
Han: i am 100% imagining this strained awkward silence Psalm: is he gonna crush it in his bare hands, BAROK VON VORDE... Finn:😳 Han: chip what did we watch dgs FOR Chip: NO
Finn: "morning uncle" finn stares kinda wondering why hes not sitting down but thats not gonna ruin his day Vorde: "morning finnian, i hope waking during daylight hours isnt too much for you" his eyes look sleepy as he speaks Orin: orin swallows his apple and speaks up "take a seat boss!" Vorde: he shakes his head in response "need to stand for a while for the blood to return to my legs" Finn: finn cant help but smile at that and responds "mm not exactly pleasant but i can manage. did you stay up?"
As the two chat Keva takes the moment to go take a quick morning bath, bringing Amos into the bathroom with her to give him a clean as well. Orin watches her take the rat into the bathroom with a face of confusion.
Vorde: "good to know" he pauses "hmm yes, I’ve been working through the night on how to present our case to the royalty, im going to be needing you all to speak as well once were before the court, merely on the things that prove you weren't responsible for the assassinations. We've the evidence to back up our claims so im not too worried. Of course if the royalty calls upon you you're each to respond in kind as well.” Finn: source: trust me Han: han hmms
Vorde seems to stretch slightly after finishing his apple and finally takes a seat at the dining table with the others, crossing his legs as he sits. 
Vorde: “My plan is thus; gain entry to the palace and an audience with the royalty, once there reveal the truth that the Red Letterhead’s machinations are the true cause for all this strife and go from there, i intend to warn them that Theyord’s apparent plans are about to be put into motion soon as well” he glances back over at his room “i will be presenting and handing over the items we have procured this far, including the tome" he glances at you psalm "hopefully it will be proof positive enough, should the archmage be around she won't find ive anything to hide on the matter”
He takes a quick sigh and rubs one of his eyes “I'm not sure what the royals will decide after that, I imagine they will put further efforts in place regarding the protection of the city and its walls, they should in anycase. If we are free to walk after we can investigate madam Shelly Carter’s lead after, perhaps we may request aid for the task as well, though I'm sure they will be hard pressed to spare much after such a threat to the city has been revealed. They’ll want all hands on deck”
Finn: finn nods and just thinks "man my uncle is so smart and cool. what a solid plan." Cimmorro: 🤨 Plum:
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Han: a lot seems to be hinging on the royals kind nature Vorde: true, they arent benevolent but i dont think they're idiots either. It would be hard to ignore the items we've gathered. As well as the presence of a time limit Han: .... not that we have a better plan, but were i in that position, i just throw us in jail, less loose ends Psalm: Here's to hoping they don't just jump to conclusions hm? ^_^ Han: "what might we think to do then" said at the group kinda Plum: dunno, never busted outta jail before
The group decide that if worse comes to worse they’d prefer to try and figure out a plan to jailbreak themselves rather than resist the guardsmen and die trying. They also bring up the fact that they still currently think the mayor and Vinny are still compromised or under Theyord’s influence, and to keep it in mind. Keva leaves the bath around soon after and rejoins the group discussion.
Vorde: he continues, blinking slowly “hmm yes i forgot to specify, we are going ahead with the prisoners plan. However it won't be good for me to parade you all through the street even if you are ‘restrained’, it would be best if we could appear right before the guardsmen at the palace so the closest place for them to lock you up if they decide too is within the palace itself. I should state if they do haul you away, I advise you not to resist, with the city on guard as it is it will be nigh impossible for you to escape anywhere. If I do my job right you will be out within half an hour I suspect and brought to the court if you are carted off, that is what I plan anyway.” he pauses "ill do my best to stick with you however" Han: HAN BREATHES A LONG BREATHE X2 Psalm: “Appreciated. Always good to have friends in higher places for this kind of thing, rather than muscle your way out of it “ @ han Han: neither of those things seem to go well for me Psalm: he just shrugs
Vorde: he unclasps his hands and continues speaking "speaking of, are any of carrying any rope on your person" Han: shibari time huh Cimmorro: bondage ti Keva: keva asks "what for" Vorde: aforementioned restraints
Cimmorro: "yall don't have rope in this house??" 🤨 Vorde: 🤨 vorde like no bro Cimmorro: damn ok sorry Chip: [cimm leaves the room] Cimmorro: KGJFLSDKJGKLSFG
Rokka hands Vorde a few lengths of rope from his pack to tie the group up with in their fake prisoners ploy, satisfied Vorde then tucks it away for later. He then brings up another concern he seems to have on his mind.
Vorde: he turns to you Finn with his brows furrowed “I am not sure...if I ought to bring you along Finnian. It is best we act swiftly which does mean leaving during daylight. You could stay here, though perhaps i ought to leave Orin with you. Best if you weren't alone after what happened a week back.” Finn: finn also furrows his brows and ponders his uncles words for a moment. "is it only because of the daylight uncle?" Vorde: he thinks for a moment "i suppose so"
Finn asks Orin to then go check and see how harsh the sunlight out today seems, he obliges, getting up to carefully sneak his way past the curtain as the group continue discussing the matter.
Han: han glances btwn vorde n finn quizzically "what happened a week ago" Finn: i exchange looks with vorde as to telepathically ask whos gonna answer her. Vorde: he looks at you finn and sighs before turning back to you han, tapping the table with one finger "when we first arrived in Shorewater and began poking around we were sent an uninvited visitor" Han: who Vorde: an assassin Han: han rolls her eyes "yes i got that but. any identifying features" Vorde: i found a letterheads token on him, though he was dressed as a guardsman. No ring so i assume he killed someone and stole their clothes to find passage to our room. Nothing else stood out about him. Han: han hmms thoughtfully Chip: geralt hmmm Han: yea, the energy im channelling today
Han: he didnt return and they didnt send anyone else to finish the job. cocky Vorde: [a nod] Psalm: or maybe with their ceremony on the horizon they decided they needed everyone focused on the same goal? Han: which is, in a word, cocky Psalm: sure if you want to put it that way
Han: "wait what did you do with the body" @ vorde Vorde: dumped in the sewers Han: han goes HHHRMMNH fwustwated
Orin returns and informs Finn and the gang that it appears to be cloudy out today, they should be good if Finn covers up with heavy cloaks. Finn thanks him and tells his uncle it should be alright for him to come with them, though he wouldn't mind staying back if that is what he preferred.
Vorde: vorde like hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 
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Psalm: “wouldn't it be safer to stick with a group in that case?” with his nephew there maybe he'll try harder to make things not go badly for us! 🙂 Plum: i also think it'd be kinda bad to be here alone, not like they didn't see us all runnin around Vorde: "i suppose it is better to stick together in this case" he looks at you finn "try not to horse around too much in the daylight" vorde worried parent mode engaged Finn: finn gives a big smile "got it!". >finn feels cared for friendship meter goes up Vorde: hmm, it would be more convincing in any case if i wasnt the only one bringing a group of fugitives to the palace. Finnian and Orin could make also have hold of the restraints.
Finn now assured that he is coming along, heads off into his room to quickly bulk up for the outside journey. Donning three three cloaks, the heaviest on top, thick black gloves and boots, a big sunhat and a scarf to protect his neck, he waddles back out into the main room where the party is situated.
Keva: keva's mouth seems to wiggle as she tries not to laugh Vorde: as you wander out and present yourself, vorde walks up to you and inspects your ensemble, after a moment he adjusts your scarf so it covers you mouth more and hmm's satisfied Orin: orin shouts a "looking good!" from across the room and snorts at keva Keva: keva shoots orin a look back like "what" and her smile breaks thru a little more before she fixes her face Plum: plum gives you a thumbs up Finn: "thanks uncle!!" finn beams @ vorde and looks at plum and orin and also shoots them a grateful smile
Vorde stretches again slightly, seemingly finally more awake then before, he informs the party to ready themselves to set off. They’ll get as close as they can to the palace before putting on the restrained charade, informing them they need to only disguise themselves well enough for a 5 minute walk through some alleys. Heading back into his room he begins preparing the evidence within his satchel and making himself presentable, the party following suit in trying to look conspicuous.
Keva: keva ties up her wet hair and pulls her hood and face mask up Han: han braids her hair and throws up cape too Psalm: (uses disguise kit) for good measure i just pull my hood up too Cimmorro: i'll just take off all the flashy jewellery and keep the hood up if that suffices Rokka: DISGUISE RING...
Rokka uses the disguise ring stolen from the letterheads to once again turn himself into a different human form, Chris Rokksworth, pop sensation. Plum asks the group if they oughta down the red potion they found earlier to change their hair colour.
Plum: can i just drink that weird potion and call it a day Han: angery ronand mcdoland Keva: 
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Psalm: i don't see why not, i'm hard pressed to think of a better time to use it Han: han shrugs in a ye sure way Plum: [looking very excited] "ok yeah sure" i chug that shit
you pop open the red bulbous vial and drink the airy liquid. slowly youre hair turns red, additionally your tongue does as well. 
Rokka: cool hair plum Finn: i give a thumbs up back at plum for earlier.
Vorde walks out of the room once more, he almost seems surprised seeing Rokka as a person but doesn't comment, he also doesn't say anything about plums hair. Satisfied with the disguises he heads for the balcony window, informing them its better if theyre not all seen exiting the front. He slides open the curtains and clicks open the doors, peering out for witnesses before he motions for the group to all follow him as he hops down. Orin adjusts his cloak and follows quickly after.
Rokka: vorde am i hot, am i hot to u vorde
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> 🎵  Aequilibrium. Medieval Tune. Hurdy-Gurdy With Organ / Andrey Vinogradov
The group quickly follow after the two sliding down the side of the building, though psalm seems to hitch his hooves on some stonework, nearly chipping them oww....his pedicure. The rest make it down quick enough and follow as Vorde begins leading the way through the shadowed alleys, as stealthily as they can to avoid detection from the increased patrols. Vorde keeping the lead and lookout helps the group manage to get by without sticking out too much.
Finally they all slowly come to a stop at an alley corner, as they come close they steal a glance at the palace, it looks as regal in the daylight as it did on the night the group all first stood before it, its peaks reaching high into the sky. The large light blue and white extravagant building dwarfs their forms, though it no longer has the inviting warm glow and festive aura as it did before. Guards stand alert and in a large number around the streets and on top of the walls, the main gates firmly shut with two royal guardsmen stationed in front of it at the top of the stairs leading up to it. Vorde quickly calls the group to attention.
Vorde: “follow my lead and don't put up too much of a fight, be sure to make sour enough faces to be convincing however, at least until you’re called before the court” he pulls the rope out of his satchel Keva: keva's face sours upon seeing the ropes come out no problem Han: hans been sour this whole time no worries bruv, i also keep a look out, like hans basically constantly alert and trying take in every little thing Psalm: psalm just stoic face as per usual, elevator music Rokka: im a celebrity im good at this, jk rokka is nervous af Plum: i always look kinda sour anyways Cimmorro: 😳 cimm like this Chip: cimm a freak like dat Psalm: LOOOL Cimmorro: oh no you caught mee, what ever shall i do, arrest this Plum: shut up shut up Han: cimm 😳 damn u pulling out ropes on the first date?
Vorde moves to hand some of the rope to Orin and they get to tying the six of the groups hands up, not too tightly but convincingly enough. He hands the rope holding Keva and Psalm off to Orin, and Han and Rokka to Finn, holding Plum and Cimmorro’s in his own. 
Vorde: "right then, plays about to begin, stay calm and follow my lead" he gives orin and finn both a nod Han: han nudges rokka to get his attention Rokka: tilts head at han ? Han: han points to vorde and makes a stupid face while pretending to talk seriously Rokka: rokka tries to stifle his laughs Finn: finn peeks out from under his scarf and squints Han: han stops immediately if she sees finn looking Rokka: rokka making snorting sounds from failing to not laugh Finn: I WAS GONNA WRITE THAT FINN HAS A SOMEWHAT APOLOGETIC LOOK BUT THEN YOU SENT THAT POKI Han: han is the picture of innocence Finn: finns rolls his eyes and turns his attention elsewhere
Psalm: well this works out pretty nicely doesn't it, since i've been kind of curious about you. Orin: he just raises a brow Keva: keva looks at psalm Psalm: he just smiles Ghester: [plays laughtrack.mp3 in ur head] Psalm: well i'm not the most learned person out there, but i was a bit curious how you came to start working for vorde is all Keva: you ask a lot of questions for someone who doesn't answer them Psalm: i think you're misunderstanding, i'm not asking anything. if i had an answer there'd be nothing to be curious about. Keva: keva makes a face like you're just saying words at her psalm Psalm: psalm just sighs Orin: “i dont mind telling you, its nothing special. Maybe after we get through court though" he looks back at you keva "no need to be so cagey about it really" Psalm: i highly doubt that it's nothing special. and i don't think there's been a time where she hasn't been cagey around me i think. Keva: oh don't go thinking you're special Psalm: oh i'm not? now i'm even more hurt  
Cimmorro: "so how are we feelin today" cimm attempts to nudge plum gently but ends up hitting their head with his elbow accidentally,  oh shit sorry your wig Plum: [GROANS REALLY LOUDLY] Cimmorro: well at least we're able to play the sour part of this play eh, all according to keikaku [editors note: keikaku means plan] Plum: always, not hard with this group Cimmorro: agreed. hey at least we're having the thrill of our lives eh? who knew we'd have a one way trip to life sentence. free! Plum: i honestly.... Cannot tell if you're joking Cimmorro: 
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Plum: [plum laughs] Vorde: while looking for a chance to head out of the alley he listens to the two of you like : | Cimmorro: vorde not being paid enough by the hour to baby sit cimm
Rokka: dont make me laugh im trying to be nervous Han: "whats there to be nervous about, really" han has a weak smile lmao Rokka: life sentence Han: "just gotta break out then" nudges rokka again Rokka: "ur right. ur so smart han" rokka visibly relaxes as he talks to han more aha Han: han laughs quietly "wish i had someone nice like you for a sibling instead of shitheads" Rokka: no stopping that now Han: after han finally Gets it, shes trying not to look like [crying emoji] then looks away kinda shy? "...they arent. complete shitheads......... i think you would get along nicely with'em" Finn: finn eavesdropping @ han, inch resting Rokka: I'd love to meet them one day if we make it out of this Han: "we will. i have to knock the life out of one of them" han smiles Rokka: how many siblings do you have Han: han loses her smile a touch and hesitates a sec b4 answering "...two now." Rokka: now..? Vorde: out of the corner of your eye you all see vorde come to attention and speak "its as empty as it'll be, nows the time to get as far as we can. were on" he shoots you all a glance. Rokka: rokka shoots a quick concerned glance at han before facing forward again
Vorde pulls the two behind him ahead on the ropes and marches proudly into the street, walking at a speedy pace followed by Orin and Finn, the group gets as far up the stairway to the main gates as possible before the entourage is spotted by the various nearby royal guardsman.
Immediately they hear a few shouts ahead of them as the two royal guards by the door call out to Vorde to halt, looking the group also notice the guards on the walls train arrows on their forms. Behind, nearby guards quickly run up to flank the group, surrounding them.
Keva: keva tenses up as the guards approach Han: han too, also making note of fucking everything, how many people, exits, all that shit Rokka: rokka also does the tense Plum: plum stands a little closer to cimm and vorde Psalm: psalm is also just scoping the place out for good measure
Vorde: he clears his throat before speaking loudly and plainly “I, Vorde Barvotte of Antessa, have found and bring to you now, the assassins and wanted fugitives responsible for the carnage during the Elfonsent Ball but not a few nights ago” he continues a little less loudly with his brow furrowed “I bring grave news regarding their actions and future plans of attack on the city, i demand to be brought before the nobility and kings at once to relay this pertinent information immediately” the two royal guardsman in front of him pause for a moment and eyeball the group behind him bound in ropes.
Han appears to get the stink eye specifically from one of the guardsmen before the guard on the right, presumably the guard captain speaks up.
Guard Captain: “there are only 5 assassins left alive to my knowledge 'good' sire, and wasn't one of em' a lupin?” she turns her head to the other guard as if to ask for confirmation, he nods his head. Vorde: he clasps his hands together before responding “it appears you were not thorough enough in your investigation of the body then guard captain, it is of dire importance this error is rectified wouldn't you agree? as for the second question" he looks over at finn and gestures for him to bring chris rokksworth pop sensation forward Han: pop sensation chris rokksworth cant be bad! hes a star! Rokka: silly! hes just getting into his new movie role!
Finn brings Rokka forward as prompted by Vorde, reaching for Rokka’s bound hands Vorde pulls off the ring shifting his form immediately back to his lupin one.
Vorde: "These assassins are crafty wouldn't you say, hiding their faces to avoid detection." he gives you a quick look rokka that to you seems like hes saying gj bro Rokka: rokka just makes a surprised face :OOOOOOO
Satisfied, Vorde turns curtly and pushes Rokka back to where he was standing before, turning back to the guard captain. She squints at him and then quickly turns and raises her arm, ordering the nearby guardsman to examine the tied up members of the party for any weapons.
Han: han probably has all her weapons on her.... she grits her teeth over this lol, han glaring dagger into whoever has her stuff lmao Rokka: [nooo dont confiscate my swords] Keva: keva scowls as a guard approaches her and pats her down Han: eat shit copper
Orin tries to give Keva and Psalm placating looks throughout the process while not being obvious. The six members of the party have all their physical weapons removed from their persons. The guardsman on the right clears her throat seemingly satisfied with her appraisal and shouts at the guards on the walls to lift the gates, as she does Vorde gives the group a barely noticeable nod and continues speaking.
Vorde: “I must be bring them all before the nobility themselves as soon as possible, their testimony will be important for what i am to tell the royalty, i cannot explain their actions without them and the imminent threat to the city without them”  Guard Captain: she responds with a curt “you want to bring assassins before the kings for a second time?” Vorde: they are bound and weaponless, they couldn't hurt more than a fly as they stand now, beaten and docile. I'm sure you’ve a great manner of ways to check before they are brought anywhere near the nobility but i stress, i must speak to them with all of the fugitives present. It is of the greatest importance
The group watch the main gates slowly rise as Vorde speaks, hearing the grunting of guards nearby as they work it open. They’re all ushered ahead by the guardsmen behind them to walk through the gates. Stepping over the threshold they feel a wash of something pass over them as they enter the perimeter of the palace before moving along. 
Ghester: In the back of your head Psalm you hear Ghester make almost what sounds like a grunt of pain before hearing him whisper “....nasty enchantments in place now i see” Psalm: psalm's just looks at orin like eh could be worse, oh wait
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Psalm: psalm just tries to mask cough asking ghester "are you alright?" in infernal Ghester: you hear a strained hmm as he speaks "nothing that will kill me but it shall be a persistent pain for a while i suppose, im being forcefully restrained is how i would put it. dont worry, i'll do my best to keep a watchful eye" Psalm: quietly "hmm, i wasn't that concerned about them taking my stuff but knowing that i guess i should be. although i can't really say i'm surprised they'd have you covered too." Ghester: he gives a dreary sigh Psalm: what do you want me to kiss it better? tough it out man! you're like a million years old aren't you? Ghester: he doesn't respond Psalm: * slightly concerned *
Keva: keva's gone from staring warily at the guards to staring at psalm talking to himself Han: 🤨 Psalm: psalm like why y'all staring at me Han: cant a man talk to himself every once in a while Psalm: thats what im saying
As the group walk through they all hear the guard captain Vorde is speaking to respond with a “we’ll see” before she pulls another guard over and motions for them to run ahead of the group with a message.
They quickly take off, the guard captain then turns and motions for Vorde and the entourage to follow close behind. The group are all ushered through a grand main garden, blooming flowers of yellow and blue and large plants bracket the main pathway. They feel plenty of eyes on then as they’re lead through the grounds.
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> 🎵  Dark Medieval Blues. Hurdy-Gurdy, Organ & Drum / Andrey Vinogradov
The group is pushed towards the main palace entrance doors and a grand entrance foyer, flanked by royal guardsmen as they enter. There are a number more than there were during the Ball they notice as they’re are ushered down a tall corridor to the right, the royal guardsman marching along with them the whole way.
Eventually in one of the corridors they are brought to a stop. Soon after the messenger that was sent ahead earlier rushes back, as he heaves out of breath the guard captain mutters an impatient “and…?” he stands puffing before sidling up to whisper in her ear, she makes a sour face afterwards.
Guard Captain: “You’re to be examined before i bring you before the court” she points at a nearby door “inside” 
The group are once again hauled through by the guards. They find themselves led through a door to what appears to be an old and ornate looking library, though somewhat messy looking, before being ordered to sit upon a set of chairs lined up near a long wooden table.
The ceiling here is high and there are various potted plants strewn about the tall cases of old tomes, ladders with wheels on the bottom are affixed to the large wooden bookshelves. Orin seems to be looking about the large room with curiosity as if he cant help himself.
Psalm: psalm is same he's basically like "oh shit! books!!" Han: han keeps glaring at the guard who took all her shit n gritting her teeth Finn: finn also letting his eyes wander a little around the room Keva: keva also looks around and takes it all in warily
After a few minutes of waiting you all see the door open again as a woman wearing a large hat with aqua toned skin steps through, fins sprouting from her face.
Han: han briefly looks at her, then does a double take.  Rokka: anxiety sky rockets
Han: han wolf whistles smh she’s a chad dont be stupid Psalm: PLEASE NO Han: NO NO AS;LKHFDLKHWADS;LKF IM KIDDING IM KIDDING Cimmorro: KVLDJSKGJSDKLG\ Han: u can keep me in these cuffs baby girl (winks) Psalm: psalm throws up Plum: [retches] Han: this is why han only gets laid when she pays Psalm: OH MY LORD WHAT A THING TO SAY LMFAO Chip: she fucks but at what cost (25 gold) Han: 25 GOLD, DAMN
The woman appears as if she's a triton, the race typically live underwater they suppose shorewater is located on the sea, not strange for the people to make their way into the politics of the country on the oceans doorstep.
Carrying papers with her they note that she appears to be formally dressed, though they aren't quite sure of her station. She moves towards the table with a nod and places the notes and items she seems to be carrying down with a quick huff and turning to the guardsman
Mardella: “I’m here to examine the accused, i shall cast a general spell then probe further if i need too” as she speaks she brushes an errant hair behind one of her fins. Han: raise ur hand if u dont wanna get zone of truth-ed Plum: I DO I DO I WANNA GET ZONE OF TRUTHED MAKE THIS NIGHTMARE END I'M INNOCENT Han: AKLDSF;LKHRAWLKHHESGDLKAW;LKJ4F all my charm spell nightmares coming to life
Mardella: turning to the three not seated she continues “I am guessing you are Vorde Barotte then?” Vorde: he gives a small bow in response “yes that is correct” Mardella: she hmms and continues “I am curious as to how you apprehended them all when the guardsman had such difficulty, but you seem to express a great desire to speak before the kings themselves so i will leave the needling for the moment” she turns back to the rest of you seated in the chairs “right then this shall take me some time”
She moves to sit at the long table and picks up the papers she was holding. Just then the group also notice she also has a quill and a pot of ink near her. She quickly gets to work drawing notes of some sort before standing.
She walks back to the 6 of them and speaks casting a spell, she seems to grip something at her neck glowing a white light for a moment before relenting. She casts the Zone of Truth of spell, affecting all of them except for Psalm and Cimmorro. Should they speak now they can only respond truthfully.
Psalm: i almost wished cimm failed that just to force him to speak properly Plum: cimm says peenus weenus fr and this woman is like, i am in the presence of a complicated mind... a puzzle box Cimmorro: JKGSDGJSG now everyone's in MY world Chip: lets start with your childhood cimmorro Cimmorro: AM I AT THERAPY? Han: YES
Mardella: she clasps her hands in front of herself and speaks "i shall ask you a series of questions, i expect you to cooperate with this process" she pauses and continues "are any you of currently under the effects of a spell, intended to deceive?" Keva: no Plum: nah Psalm: as far as i am aware, no Han: no Rokka: nope Cimmorro: nope
Han: laughs over the differences n similarities in our responses Psalm: that’s rp babey! Plum: tag urself
Mardella: she hmms and continues "are any of you still carrying weapons or contraband on your person" Han: han grits her teeth "i fucking wish" Keva: no Psalm: no Cimmorro: nope Rokka: nope :( Plum: no Cimmorro: plum sitting there thinking "is this illegal? fuck if i know" (re their pink medical potion) for 30 seconds before answering
Mardella: she continues "do you harbour ill intent towards the royalty of this country" Plum: no Keva: no Han: no Rokka: never Psalm: no Cimmorro: not yet i dont :d Plum: LFAMOGOGOO Han:;KHAS;LKDF;AWEFD Cimmorro: DONT TEST ME Chip: cimmorro cringe compilation Psalm: @ cim
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Cimmorro: LKBF;DBCVB,SB.,S Han: we are all testing her patience,  cimm and han 🤝 at their wits fucking end Cimmorro: they find truce. Once
Mardella: she gives you a look cimm and continues "how long ago did you arrive and shorewater, and for what purpose" Keva: 2 weeks. i’m looking for someone Plum: a few weeks ago, came here to talk to vorde Rokka: nearly a month, im just exploring Psalm: a little under two weeks. and i'm just here for a change of scenery Cimmorro: came around 2 weeks back or so. just passing by really, pilgrimaging Han: almost 5 seasons. my friend left me here to find myself
Mardella: she humms "and a final one, were you all here on the night of the Elfonsent Ball?" Han: yes Keva: yes Cimmorro: yup Psalm: yes Plum: ya Rokka: yup
Mardella: satisfied she nods and unclasps her hands "thank you for complying" 
The woman walks back to the end of the table where she placed her papers and begins to draw with the ink and quill, what look like runes of a sort, whispering under her breath, they figure shes slowly casting another spell.
They sit in silence under the watch of the guardsman, about ten minutes pass before she seems to finish, a quick glow bursts from her hands and she stands once again, coming to scrutinise them all. She then slowly examines them all one by one from a distance, making her way down the line before stopping after a time, seemingly satisfied.
Mardella: “I’ve not detected anything suspicious in the way of magic for now” she stands and dusts her dress slightly “i shall go and inform the kings, lead them to the court hall once you are ready” she turns and gives Vorde a slight bow before standing and leaving the room. 
Han: oh that was a detect magic not identify, i was like how is psalm not pinging -  warlock pact Cimmorro: psalm big dong pinging under the radar of mommy Psalm: yeah everything about that is horrible jez Chip: psalm back on pornhub Psalm: everything about what you just said is terrible, GOD, THIS IS LIKE THE THIRD TIME Plum: jez, jez i will beat you one day Cimmorro: Nicj9jjoflkeneje
The guard captain satisfied, motions for the guards to haul the group out of the room and back through the palace, the other three following close behind. Once more they are led through the tall corridors of the palace into a more minimalistically decorated area, though it seems everywhere in this place is covered in plush long carpets. Eventually they are all brought before a large set of double doors, taller than themselves, and brought to a stop. 
The guard captain stands at attention before them all, bringing Vorde, Finn and Orin in front of the group, before turning and lightly knocking on the door. A moment passes and soon after what they assume to be a secretary of sorts sticks his head out and whispers in her ear before leaning back inside and closing the door.
Plum: [fidgeting] Rokka: [fidgeting] Han: han is stoic tense n grimacing the usual Keva: keva's like, lightly scuffing the plush carpet with a shoe as she looks around Psalm: psalm sneezes Chip: ghester doesn't say bless you
Guard Captain: she turns back to you all and speaks “You have been granted an audience with the kings, the princess, the archmage and the high arcane adviser. You will speak when spoken too and keep your hands to yourself, if i notice but a hair out of place, you're out the door. As for the rest of you-” she cranes her head “try anything again and we’ll gut you where you stand, am i clear?” Plum: i heard one of the kings is really hot, IM JK Han: KKHDA;SLKHFALKHEFDS Cimmorro: JDJFKROEDLDM so ure saying hes not? 🤔
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> 🎵  The Great Cross-Examination ~ Allegro 2015 / The Great Ace Attorney OST
The guard captain turns and pushes open the doors walking ahead. Vorde, Orin and Finn follow after her as the rest of the group are pushed along behind by the royal guardsman. They all enter what looks like a large chamber, a small set of stairs leading down into a large circle with an ornate design in its centre, tall pillars along either end. At the centre hanging over the centre of the large circle is a lit chandelier, clean in its design.
Across and up another set of stairs appears to be 5 seats, two more ornately decorated than the others, each sat upon by a person flanked by stone statues. The two kings Jermiah and Peruvus Argotts, sit in the two at the centre, flanked by princess Forrin Argott. Next to them sits a gnome in ornate garb, and the woman from earlier, Mardella. 
The chamber has a set of royal guardsmen lined up on either end of the wall at attention, the group is slowly led down to the centre of the room as the guard captain in front of them speaks, head bowed low.
Psalm: A GNOME? :pogchamp: WE'VE BEEN KONGED Plum: GNOME COOL Cimmorro: DAMN TGIF THANK GNOME ITS FRIDAY Han: 
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Rokka: SDFCGVHBJKL Cimmorro: THANKS POKI
Guard Captain: your majesty's, i bring Vorde Barvotte of Antessa and his associates, as well as the 6 fugitives wanted for the events that occurred during the Efonsent Ball” she then steps back and aside, allowing Vorde, Finn and Orin to stand facing the court instead. “He claims to have pertinent information regarding their plans and a future plan of attack upon the city, he desired to relay this directly to the court.” The eyes of the five soon land on Vorde as he folds his arms behind his back.
Jeremiah: the king consort speaks up first “Well no need to keep us in suspense sire, speak freely. Mind we are a bit on edge at the moment so if possible it would be well for us to keep this audience brief” Turen: you hear the gnome woman speak up soon after him with a sigh “better for us to be taking no audiences at this time with the work to be done right now” Forrin: The princess responds soon after “we can't turn down any information at this time Turen, even if it ends up being a farce. Though I doubt the good sir would jeopardise himself so readily in such a precarious time, correct?” she tilts her head slightly with a glance at Vorde. Vorde: He responds with a small bow and a brief “of course your highness” Jermiah: he once again waves his hand as if prompting Vorde to begin speaking once more. Cimmorro: speak now thot Plum: plum is just listening to them say words and not absorbing any of it,  just thinking i am looking at the faces of the rulers of this country right now, i wonder what my parents would think Finn: finn looking at these people like man theyre richer than us Cimmorro: we start dancing behind him, interactive presentation Han: we start doing fortnite dances Psalm: psalm is also like hmm wonder what my parents would think, how did i end up here
Vorde: standing straight again he begins “I bring important news of dire events but more notably i must stress an important detail first. The 6 fugitives behind me stand accused of heinous crimes towards the court and the sanctity of this city and country, but I've proof they were merely innocent bystanders who were used. Their faces stolen to be equipped as masks in crimes against this country” He straightens his back slightly before continuing “On my person i have a pieces of evidence that point towards the true culprits behind the attack on your persons your majesty’s, a cult known by the moniker ‘The Red Letterheads’ who deal in disgusting acts for a purpose i do not fully understand myself yet” 
 As Vorde speaks the group see the 5 sitting in front of him watch with rapt attention, he details the evidence they’ve all found and presents his satchel, leaving it upon the ground for examination as he speaks. The guard captain takes the satchel and walks it to the gnome Turen and Mardella who begin to examine its contents. 
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> 🎵  Joint Reasoning (Type A) / The Great Ace Attorney OST
Throughout his monologue he turns to each member of the party to provide testimony or speak upon the things they have seen and encountered over the past few days to prove their innocence, and the letterheads being the true culprits before leaving the closing argument to Finn.
Han: uses her outlander feat to provide testimony explaining the groups movements precisely retracing their steps and describing the letterheads place
Psalm: persuades them that the night started with the group being either hired as vinny's bodyguards or brought along as his +1's and the reason why they chose them for doppelgangers was because they were apparently easy targets
Plum: talks about the fact that they only came to shorewater to talk to vorde and then was going to fuck off back to talornia or wherever - they say "fuck off back to" and then are like ah oops
Keva: say she was talking with silversoul and was in his vicinity during the attack, so she saw him stabbed and wasn't around vinny who her doppelganger was seen stabbing bc she was across the ballroom -  [ psalm jumps in on keva's point to say that he had seen the letterhead member that stabbed vinny before she disguised herself as keva and that they later apprehended her and got information out of her ]
Rokka: mentions that he was speaking to vorde with han and plum at the ball,  BRO IM JUST A JOCK
Cimmorro: speaks precisely about the methods of necromancy the group saw, including the undead zombies and the blood clones.
Finn: for the closing statement he emphasises keva’s testimony re:gintama and cimmorro’s regarding the blood clones. Tying that in with the evidence the group  have and making it clear that the real perpetrators have pressing motives that need to be investigated with utmost urgency
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> 🎵  The Old Bailey ~ Closing Argument / The Great Ace Attorney OST
Finn eventually closes out the argument, nervously taking a breath as he finishes speaking. In front of them the group watch as the court thinks of the things the party has relayed, most of them with their brows furrowed. 
Psalm: i hope this turns into a "glad we brought him!" situation Cimmorro: PLZ 🥺
Peruvus: finally he speaks up “So this is true then? I had suspicions this was part of a greater plot but it appears to have become all the truer with every word you’ve spoken.”  Jeremiah: “The inconsistencies within your testimony make sense if the culprits were in fact doppelgangers, a cult hmm” looking at you Finn he continues "you said his name was Theyord?” Han: han zones out for a sec and then goes "i believe he also went by ansam?" Finn: finn pulls down his scarf slightly. "Indeed. But my uncle has a better account of this, if you do not mind him relaying it in my place." and just. eyeballs vorde. motioning for him to take over. Cimmorro: this is finn the whole time but crying
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Vorde: Yes, your majesty, i think in a previous life he may have gone by the name Ansam, i'm unsure of its relevance at the moment Jeremiah: at that he seems to think for a moment before frowning and putting a hand to his face to think, not speaking after. Turen: next to him the archmage speaks up “This tome is certifiably filled with black magic, the kind you often dont see used on the material plane by living creatures because of how complicated the runes are. If this cult's patron is Mephisto then that is most certainly where they got these litany of spells, he just gives them out to anyone who asks now? This devil gives me a headache…” she turns towards the three standing members of royalty before continuing “i can confirm the contents of this tome are indeed teemed toward necromancy and mind control, it may explain a few things. The enchantments on these items feel like the scratchings of the desperate” she looks over at you cimmorro "seems he knows what hes talking about" Cimmorro: cimm just looks back at them like <:3c
Keva and Han attempt to study the king consort’s reaction to the name Ansam but dont get much aside from the fact that he recognises it, theyre unsure how affected he is right now by its mention. Han does note that the 5 seem to be seriously considering the groups argument, seems Finn’s closing argument was quite strong. 
Psalm also thinks now and considers if he’s heard the name Ansam before, he thinks that perhaps faintly he may have heard it somewhere back home, thinking that it sounds like it could be the name of tiefling. Though he doesnt get much else. Soon after Cimmorro is praised Mardella once again speaks up 
Mardella: “i do not think they're lying about the stolen faces, we had the suspicion already. Once we removed the ring upon the corpse in the palace it changed its face completely, it's of the same make as the one I hold now” she twirls the disguise ring around in the light. “Your majesty’s, your highness, i too can confirm the authenticity of these items as Turen just did” Forrin: at this she responds, lifting her arm slightly, beckoning towards the guard captain “as a gesture of trust, i’d like you to remove their bindings as they stand before us captain” 
Quickly bowing, the guard captain walks over to the group of six, Orin, Finn and Vorde drop the ropes as she quickly cuts each member free one by one, their hands allowed to roam as they please. Other royal guards step forward to take the ropes and remove them from the hall as the king begins to speak once more.
Peruvus: “I'm going to choose to believe the events you’ve just relayed to us to be truth, in which case I apologise for the rough treatment you’ve no doubt undergone in place of our true culprits. It must not have been easy gathering all of this information.” He turns to you Finnian, and continues “earlier your group said there was an immediate dire threat facing us, can you explain? Or was this also part of the farce to gain an audience with us” he clasps his hands over his knees as he speaks, leaning forward slightly “we’ve upped the city’s defences somewhat since the assassination attempts and the return of our archmage, but there have been unusual happenings i've noticed over the past day. I’d like to know what you can tell me and if you’ve any further leads”  Psalm: If I may, what are these 'unusual happenings' you're referring to? Peruvus: he shits his attention over towards you psalm and responds "The mayor caused a great hullabaloo at the government ward gates, it appears as if he started a fist fight with all the nearby guardsmen out of the blue. None were eager to bring him down as he was already still injured from the Ball’s events" he rubs the bridge of his nose as if beleaguered "Similarly a cleric from the church of Heiron was seen pounding on the gates in the church district soon after his recovery within his own church's walls, he resisted any attempts from the guardsman to calm him and had to be restrained..." Keva: keva frowns @ news abt panaver Han: han tsks kind of to herself
Psalm: I see. Well going off what we know so far the cult has the ability to both disguise themselves, but their leader can temporarily possess the followers as well. The cleric is one of the wounded from the night of the ball, so that at least explains his breakdown. Keva: "silversoul" keva says, quieter than she usually speaks Psalm: sorry what was that Keva: keva huffs and says louder "his name was panaver silversoul. he was the one i was talking to." Han: we think who was stabbed, is who can be controlled by theyord Finn: "It was not a farce. Our investigation has proven that the Letterheads have been preparing to perform a ritual. Perhaps some sort of summoning. The language they used suggested serious danger. Tightened defenses or not, Shorewater is vulnerable." Finn sighs and closes his eyes for a second. "it might be of interest for you to know that they possess portals that lead to various different places in Shorewater, possibly outside of it." Psalm: With that being said, we don't really have the specifics of the 'dire' event the letterheads have planned. But for the most part they seem intent on 'punishing' Shorewater. Oh, and they plan to carry out this punishment within the next few days. Plum: i'd give us less than two days. Psalm: If even so much. We did however, infiltrate their base, so assuming they haven't left we know the whereabouts and have an idea of what it's like inside
Cimmorro:  is finn still wearing all of his layers during the entirety of this Finn: yes Cimmorro: perfect,  he's just waddling around while explaining things
Forrin: ...a large scale attack… we’ll need Turen to scour that tome for any sort of spell that might indicate to what exactly they’re attempting, perhaps that Accord wizard might assist us. We must further up the guard presence along the walls and call a lockdown perhaps.. Jeremiah: perhaps we ought evacuate the city entirely, though I wonder if we’d have enough time, if we were caught while people are outside their homes en masse it could worsen the situation entirely… Mardella: i think a lockdown would be a better course of action, if we set about activating the city wide enchantments quickly the people would be safer inside their homes than out Jeremiah: he nods in response “hmm this is true, we’ll need to expend all our effort into organising the guard as quickly as possible more than we already have, we ought to bulk up the church and government ward gates specifically as well. Its good to know we've a location to crack down on then as well. We ought to arrange a group of guardsman and mages to flush them out post hate as well..
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> 🎵  Joint Reasoning: The Great Deduction (Type B) / The Great Ace Attorney OST
Forrin calls over the guard captain and the secretary seated at the desk close by and begins relaying orders for them to begin sending out along with Peruvus. Jeremiah however continues to address the group as they do.
Jeremiah: Travellers and esteemed Barvottes. I King Consort Jeremiah, am now asking formally for your aid in this time of crisis, we are stretched thin and with not knowing what to expect the city needs as much help and eyes as we can give her. You will be compensated greatly for helping the city of Shorewater, and the country of Dorrin itself in its coming time of crisis. As well as for the hardships you have already endured, is there a name I might refer to you all as going forward?” Vorde: he turns his head at you all expectantly afterwards as well.
Cimmorro: wow even on dnd we quarantine Chip: social distancing to save from cults Psalm: damn jeremiah if you're asking like that... 👉👈 Cimmorro: jeremiah stan club Plum: sir can i get your autograph
The group then scramble to decide on a name, quickly forming a group huddle amongst themselves.
Cimmorro: cimm does a poor attempt to huddle us all up and goes "lets just go with peenus weenus" Plum: whispering heatedly "shut up cimm shut up" Psalm: sure why not, i'm sure whatever dignity we have left doesn't matter anymore right? Han: tries not to choke
Finn: finn coughs uncomfortably at cimm's suggestion. "we could simply refer to ourselves as a strike force." Han: do we even have anything that makes us one Psalm: vinny's strike force... to honour him since he's dead. /s Cimmorro: the brokebacks Plum: SHUTGUUPPGPF
Cimmorro: while everyone is debating i just walk up to the king and goes like we're the vengaboys -  "your majesty i present to you the vengaboys" Jeremiah: he looks towards you cimmorro and tilts his head "vengaboys? i see, well then Vengaboys-" and he turns to the rest of you all "i would like to ask again for finality's sake, do you have any more possible leads at the moment?" Cimmorro: i turn back to everyone and gives a thumbs up Psalm: psalm gives a thumbs up back Vorde: [internally] tf does venga mean Psalm: TF DOES VENGA MEAN Chip: vengeance boys... Cimmorro: ^ Keva: boys for vengeance Finn: 
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Psalm responds afterwards, informing the king consort that the only one they have would be the hideout as they’ve never met Theyord in person, Han emphasising only when hes possessed someone. He also brings up the notes in the back of the book, noting Shelly’s name and that she may be in possible danger.
Keva: i step a little closer to psalm and say "tell them about those people we ran into down there" Psalm: psalm just folds his arms and does what keva asks Keva: YYYEEAAAAHHH
Han: when theres a pause han also asks "what about the assassin that you caught? who are they?" Jeremiah: he looks over at you "they weren't caught per say, the guards struck them right in the ballroom before they could strike at us, dead in seconds." he thinks "we examined the body of course but as far as we could tell they weren't a Shorewater native, i dont think they were from Dorrin originally either. The most we could glean was they had a brand upon their back in the shape of a symbol once we removed the disguise”
Forrin then returns her attention to the conversation at hand, seemingly her and her brother Peruvus have finished issuing orders for the moment, having been paying attention to the ongoing conversation.
Peruvus: “We shall work on the assignment of the guardsmen across the city and deciphering all we can from the tome you’ve given us, as well as bolster the city's magic defences, and declare a lockdown. Once you return from investigating Shelly Carter’s abode I would ask you to assist us directly in these tasks. At the most i can spare some guardsmen to assist you in this endeavour, it would be best i think to send one of the captains in charge of the arcana district to help your investigation. I will send word for you to meet them at the district gates, it would be best for us to move as quickly as possible”  Turen: in response to this archmage stands “if i am no longer needed your majesty i shall consort with Mardella and the witch from the accord, my workload has suddenly increased tenfold” she rolls her shoulders as if gearing up for a fist fight.
Jeremiah nods and waves her and Mardella off, the two stand and leave the room via one of the large doors, finally him and the other two royals stand 
Jeremiah: “The royal guardsman shall escort you off the palace grounds and send word across the city that you aren't to be approached in your travel, should you require any food or rest before you head off you may use one of the rooms in the palace. The guardsmen will direct you.” Peruvus: “return as soon as you are able, we’ve not a moment to waste” Psalm: I don't speak for everyone here, but as it's still early in the day I don't think we'll be here for long before heading onto our next task Peruvus: looks towards you psalm and nods "of course, whatever suits you for the moment" He looks back towards Vorde addressing him directly "thank you again for your aid in this time from your family, sire Barvotte, it shall not be forgotten. As well as for you, Vengaboys, may we meet to discuss what comes next soon with higher hopes" 
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The royal guard captain stands and rises as the royals give the group a small courteous bow which Vorde returns doubly so. The party and co. are ushered back out of the doors of the grand courthall their names now clear, their next task pressing on their minds....
--
Notes
🦇Finn succeeded the debate skill challenge very epic
🍺 Plum drank the「  Red Potion ✨ 」who knows how long they’ll have red hair for...
-「  4 Poison Daggers ✨ 」-「 a Branding Rod ✨ 」-「 a Red Tome ✨ and -「 2 Letterhead Tokens ✨ 」 were handed over to the Court as evidence
- ITS NOON - 33 HOURS UNTIL - 📜🩸 The Reckoning 🩸📜 - (supposedly)
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agentmothmxn · 5 years ago
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rules: repost, don’t reblog. just pick a muse of yours and fill it out.
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muse: Dib
BASICS
▸ is your muse tall/short/average? average for his age!
▸ are they okay with their height? it’s a little frustrating because he’s shorter than the rest of the world, but overall, he’s fine with it ▸ what’s their hair like? i dont wanna talk about it ▸ do they spend a lot of time on their hair/with their grooming? not too much, but mainly because it’s not much work. he just brushes it out and he’s good to go. he does keep it well washed and conditioned though ▸ does your muse care about their appearance? yeah, he cares that he looks at least a little goth-adjacent at all times ▸ does your muse care about what others think about them? immensely. dib does not know peace
PREFERENCES
▸ indoors or outdoors? a little of both, actually. he does work in both places! ▸ rain or sunshine? clear skies means he can see into space better. ▸ forest or beach? forest ▸ precious metals or gems? both! ▸ flowers or perfumes? perfumes, or more accurately, colognes ▸ personality or appearance? both ▸ being alone or being in a crowd? alone ▸ order or anarchy? ORDER ▸ painful truths or white lies? painful truth. he lives and breathes for truth
▸ science or magic? science, but that’s not to say he isnt curious about magic ▸ peace or conflict? peace ▸ night or day? night. thats when the cryptids come out ▸ dusk or dawn? dusk. thats also when the cryptids come out ▸ warmth or cold? either ▸ many acquaintances or a few close friends? many acquaintances. the more that will listen to him the better
...which is actually a huge flaw in his logic. if people are closer to him, theyd be more likely to listen ▸ reading or playing a game? reading, unless hes playing video games with his sister!
QUESTIONNAIRE
▸ what are some of your muse’s bad habits? becoming short-tempered under stress, blunt, poor social skills, pressing too far, these arent even habits ▸ has your muse lost anyone close to them? how has it affected them? not yet, but he has had a couple scares (see: etf)
had zim not been armed im convinced that dib would have killed him ▸ what are some fond memories your muse has? despite the moment being so heated, he truly cherishes having fought alongside his dad. its one of the very few memories he has of him and his dad working together for a common goal without butting heads. ▸ is it easy for your muse to kill? no, BUT if its an alien then like
maybe yeah
▸ what’s it like when your muse breaks down? it depends on the extent, but one thing theyll all have in common is that he’ll cry, and he’ll usually lock himself away and/or keep to himself for some amount of time.
of course he’s immature about it. he’s not mature at all. hes a kid ▸ is your muse capable of trusting someone with their life? probably, but itd have to be someone very close ▸ what’s your muse like when they’re in love? n/a. not for this muse tagged by: no one tagging: @aliiienation, @friiendwcn, @prxfessor-membrane, @almxghtypurple, and anyone else!
(for those i tagged that have multiple blogs, feel free to do this for any of them (or all of them)! also keep in mind that i do not mind being tagged in all of the posts so go on ahead. also if you would rather i not tag you in these things please lmk)
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beyainica-blog · 6 years ago
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Guess who’s in the 230’s?
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A bit bittersweet considering I could have been this weight monday. But I will take it and stop beating myself up.
I am literally 9lbs away from the 220’s. 13 days left until valentines day.
My goal is to get to 220 on valentines. I mean I want to be lower but I will take that. I’m 18lbs away with 13 days left. I need to lose 1.4lbs a day for 13 days to get there. I think I can do it.
Lets start with the bad.
Heart?
Even though I only workout 7-14 mins every day I have been STRUGGLING to get through my workouts. Like it takes me an hour at the gym to complete 14 min workouts. I have no idea what it could be. It honestly could be a whole host of things. I had pneumonia last week, even if the virus is gone. I read that you will feel fatigue for weeks after. Also, I’m on a liquid diet, I’m going to be tired anyway. And on phentermine. My heart is literally racing which it didn’t before, just after pneumonia. Like during my workout I can feel my heart beat out my chest. I guess the caffiene doesn’t have a buffer because I don’t eat
I am extremely weak. At work I try my very best to hold it together. But I feel faint. Luckily it hasn’t been so busy so I don’t have too much to do but still. I’m lucky I have my powerade, it gives me a LITTLE energy and there is enough sugar to keep me standing. I honestly think I’m burning too many calories for not eating anything. Like I don’t count the calories I burn at work standing, I only count when I work out. But yes I do burn calories standing everyone does. Idk if I should shorten my workouts on days that I work. It would be pretty dumb of me to drive to the gym for a 4-5 min workout. It’s already stupid of me to drive there for a 7 min workout. But I will do it. Maybe not workout days I’m working. Idk. I’m losing weight rapidly. I don’t want to give up working out because I want to be toned by the end of it. All of this stress I’m putting myself in is taking a toll on my heart so I need to take it easy.
Take little steps to make it better.
1. Take phentermine AFTER my workouts. See if my heart beats less
If that works thats how I’ll do it. I only took phentermine before because it helped my energy. Thats when I was restricting with food not liquid.
To help with energy. HONESTLY. I don’t drink enough. I think I’m cute and dainty when I don’t finish my powerades because I never do. Like not on purpose I just dont feel like it. Powerade is the only source for electrolytes for me. So I HAVE to drink it. Electrolyte imbalance can also affect heart rate. Honestly I don’t drink powerade or enough electrolyte water which I special order and have been since my water fast. My regime should be to drink a litre of electrolyte water and a whole powerade. Thats enough electrolytes I feel. Tommorow, I’m bringing my 50fl ounces Assentia water that I got for .79 cents which is normally $3. I am drinking that entire thing. You know what I can start doing drinking my water in the car. On my way to work start on it. Don’t start at work. Its less stress to finish. Start finishing my water before I even touch my powerade.
I have to bear with the weakness. I’m fine somewhat its not unbearable yet. I feel the most exhausted after work. I feel like because I’m in a public setting my body just knows to keep it together. I hope I don’t faint until I’m in the 180’s at least. I won’t be THAT heavy but still a complete fat ass.
I plan to keep this liquid diet going. If I become overwhelmed the first thing I will stop is exercise. Even though the workouts are short af. Thats the first thing to go. On days I don’t work. If the problem continues I may have to alternate. One day liquid. One day 500 calories + exercise. I want to be skinny but I want to be alive with minimal damage. Eating isnt binging. Binging is ordering 16 tenders and an X large pizza from Papa Johns with chocolate and a litre of coke. I didn’t plan to eat at all during feburary, but you bet your ass I will if I ABSOLUTELY have too. Honestly I feel like it would make the weight loss faster. Eating 500 is higher than what my body is accustomed to now, so my metabolism will get faster. Like I said, only when I feel like I HAVE to I will eat. The worst thing is having to exercise everything off. Thats what I hated the most about restricting. I love on this liquid diet I only have to workout 7-14 mins a day. Imagine. 14 mins of exercise to burn off a powerade. 5 chicken tenders at 108 calories each would take 32 mins. Thats insane. But at least I’ll have the energy for it.
I am addicted to this FAST weightloss though. I woke up at 240lbs honestly. After work I was 238lbs exactly. We love flunctuations.
Sweating
I have always been a sweater. Like this is genetics. Even when I was younger and skinnier I sweat. But as I’ve gotten bigger I notice that I sweat ALOT more. Its so fucking emberrassing. I’m so scared at work. Literally was getting slight vagina sweat. I can’t even think about it. Everyone will think my vagina is diseased. Its just sweat. I wear a waist trainer. 1. To hide my belly. 2. So it can catch my back sweat. It only goes to my back so I have to wear a tank top under neath. I don’t have a good one because I refuse to spend money on it. Maybe I should start wearing my sports bras and tank until I lose a bit of weight. I started wearing a long sleeve to hide my bat arms but I get so over heated its not even funny. Like I start to sweat everywhere. Yeah having three articles of clothes will make anyone sweat. Of course the heater is on in the resturant I work at because its winter. Mix that with running around to tend to guests you have a sweaty bitch. Being fat doesnt help at all. Neither does being gentically proned to sweat. It makes it 10x worse. So I had to take off my longsleeve at work today because I just clocked in and vacuumed and could already feel the sweat accumulate. AND I JUST GOT THERE. I said nah.
But I guess good news my work shirt is a lot bigger on me, hides my bat arms better than before. The only thing I hate is you can still see my stretch marks on my arms. But they have cleared a bit, it use to be deep ridges in my arm but I lost almost 70lbs. When I get to 200lbs I don’t think they will be there anymore. I’m certain by 180lbs they won’t I bet my life.
My work uniform is black so that makes it worse though I’m thank ful. Today I had to shave my vagina and armpits to stop the sweat some what. Only to wear polyester under wear because again. I don’t wear underwear and I refuse to buy them unless they’re a medium or small. Right now large gives me wedgies so maybe I can fit into a M/L idk but I gotta get more under wear don’t have a choice because I can’t work without underwear. You know Idk if its because I had pneumonia, or if its the phentermine, or if its the liquid diet. But weeks before I didnt sweat this much. I went to work frequently without underwear. I wore my long sleeve shirt no problem. Now its a problem. Sweat can also be caused by fighting an infection. Maybe I’m still fighting the pneumonia. The thing about pneumonia is even after the virus is eliminated by antibiotics its still going to kick your ass for a few weeks. Fatigue and cough
Another thing is I move so fast at work by the time I get back to my post I’m sweating its good but, bad at the same time
Weight is still an issue and why I sweat so much so this is just an incentive to lose more weight.
Goals
I see my doctor on the 22nd or 23rd a week after valentines. I hope to be 209 or lower. By then and if I can keep on this diet I think I can. Last time I was there I was 254 (260 on their scale) so 209 will be a PLEASANT suprise and they will be very happy. Thats a 51lb weight loss and thats ALOT of weight. They will literally worship my feet and give me more phentermine they’ll give me anything I want. Though I gotta do blood work so thats like $168 but its okay it has to be done I understand. I made alot this pay period and the only thing I have to pay is, registration, tax, inspection, gym $10, mom and buy more water and powerade. I should have like $200 left. If not I deffo get paid again the 15th of this month. The 2nd of March. (The day after my cheat day) so my cheat day is on a thursday. Good. Maybe I’ll push it to saturday. Or the day I’m off. Definetly want to be out of the 200’s by the end of feburary thats my top goal.
Valentines day
I hope I’m not hyping it for nothing. I hope I get something from someone.
If I lose 2lbs for the next 13 days I’ll be 212lbs on valentines. (Could have been 207)
If I lose 1.5lbs for the next 13 days. I’ll be 218lbs (could have been 213)
If I lose 1lb a day for the next 13 days I’ll be 225lbs (could have been 220 exactly)
I hope I lose at least 1.5lbs a day consistently. So far I been losing 2-3lbs everyday. 3lbs mostly I would love to lose 3lbs a day for 13 days that would be EXCELLENT. That would put me at 199lbs exactly (could have been 194) imagine if that actually happened. I would DIE. I’m 39lbs away from getting out of the 200’s I’m excited. I just hope I’m losing weight for a reason. Honestly lose 1kg a day is reasonable I eat less than 300 calories a day, and I bet you my starting weight was more than this girl whoever she is. If I get to 199lb by valentines. Bitch. I will be 180lb by the end of feburary. Plateau nor metabolism will stop me.
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Boss
Lately I noticed that every time I go to work I work with my one manager that likes me. I can tell he likes me because the other manager which is his friend is always around. They giggle and stare at me. He makes the schedule so that I only work with him. Its kind of cute. I like how I make him shy. But sometimes I get flustered. He catches me off guard. He walks REALLY slow towards me its kind of nerve racking. I purposely dont look at him because its emberrassing. He keeps coming up to me but saying ABSOLUTELY nothing. Adorable.
Jeans
I really wanted to wear size 9 jeans, on valentines. But it wasnt because of my binge. I dont think I was going to fit in them anyway until I get to 180’s but its okay.
My size 16 wide are so fucking loose. The day they fall off my body is the day I stop wearing them period. Until then we gon wear it sis.
Belly
Despite the weightloss I don’t think my bell has been affected at all granted. I’ve only lost like 15lbs I just dont see it in my stomach which is my first problem area. I hope by valentines day at, atleast 212lbs it will reduce. Seriously I’m tired of looking at it. When I was in college at 22, I was 213 and my stomach was FLAT. I remember because I weighed myself. So these next 26lbs better be fucking good to me or I’m FIGHTING. A pound of fat in terms of physical is huge. On the scale its nothing. I’m tired of having a pouch in my jeans. I’m tired of looking at it hang. It needs to go. Arms next. At 180lb I better not see a fucking bat wing in sight.
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ithisatanytime · 4 years ago
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i deny the holocaust
 Most of the “EVIDENCE” is witness testimony gathered during the nuremberg trials, and those were a fucking joke and everyone knew it. the “confessions” are now known to have been extracted via testicular torture, which is like regular torture but they torture your fucking balls, many of them had shattered testicles and all of them suffered beatings during interrogations. which sure fine if they were cold blooded murderers of 6 million innocent people, but the holocaust narrative is psychically impossible, and frankly, stupid. incinerating the bodies the way they say, is impossible, literally impossible, and there are testimonies given of bodies cremated regularly in under a half hour, which is fucking absurd. with modern tech, under ideal conditions, it takes over an hour, and then there is maintenance that needs to be done, and when i say an hour i mean from the time the furnace turns on until the body is reduced to ash, and cremation technology has come a long way in the eighty years since the holocaust never happened. with modern technology, under ideal circumstances, meaning you dont even have to load bodies in, or clean out the furnaces or maintain them, again with MODERN technology, it would have taked no less than 30 years to do what they said was done in 4. its beyond impossible, its actually ridiculous, and this is when you give the narrative every conceivable advantage.
   There were  tons of jewish concentration camp survivors who were interviewed by steven spielburg for his film schindlers list, their interviews were used as part of a making of documentary. they left out the dozens of “death camp” survivors who described the death camps as work camps, where no one was gassed, and they were treated rather fairly, there was even currency printed specifically for the deathcamps so that they would get paid for their work, there were hospitals that treated the ill (both of the most famous first hand accounts of the holocaust, “Night” and “the diary of anne frank include accounts of jews being treated for illnesses at on site hospitals, not experimented on just treated) which makes sense if you are running a work camp, and makes no sense if you are running a death camp. also the emaciated figures we see, i think these comprise the most compelling of the evidence, its a striking visual, until you look up american pows in japan, and see those same gaunt figures, google it right now and click images, tell me those men are not the same as the ones you see in the holocaust propaganda, typhus was pandemic around the world at the time, and thats what it does to you. notice the piles of emaciated corpses, never a fat corps among them in the photos, but according to the propaganda, most of the jews were killed upon arrival at the camp, and yet they appear to be either in the advanced stages of extreme starvation OR suffering from typhus. there are documented cases of the guards at these “death camps” (work camps) who were EXECUTED for STRIKING and stealing from prisoners, seems like a terrible waist of manpower if the goal was to kill them all anyway, the red cross inspected many of what we once called deathcamps and found no evidence of any wrong doing, not once. there are no aerial photographs from spy planes depicting the massive smoke that would have been created by continuosly cremating bodies (at impossible speed and/or volume). there exists not one single document even referencing this massive industrial under taking, and the germans were notorious for keeping records. i could litereally go on all day, but again the reason you believe this impossible story has nothing to do with evidence and everything to do with emotion.
  in my early twenties i would be exposed to some holocaust denialism, and it was always swiftly debunked. this is a tactic called (ironically) poisoning the well, whereby you purposefully seed your enemy with bad arguments to be used against you so you can easily tear them apart and make anyone questioning the narrative seem ridiculous as a result. so i was pretty skeptical until i did the math myself. its not possible, its not even close to possible, there is no way in this universe that happened. The tiny minority of ethnic jews did in germany what they attempted to do in every country they ever lived in, they took over. the german revolution of 1919 just after world war one ended, communist jews (look up the leadership of the 1919 german revolution, 7/10 were ethnic jews) and the german people were subjected to all kinds of terrible shit, mostly starvation as they bled the country dry from the top. they were also pushing things like gender theory (first ever gender reassignment was in berling, just prior to hitlers rise to power) promoted prostitution, owned the newspapers and film studios. basically everything we are seeing in america and the rest of the west today, it was called the weimar era, and the germans living under the weimar jews universally despised them. when the nazis rose to power they tried to deport the jews living in germany but no one wanted them, you see ethnic jews were notorious for doing this kind of thing, they had been kicked out of over 100 countries throughout history as a result of doing this kind of shit, so no other countries wanted them seriously there was a meeting of dozens of leaders from countries around the world and the only country who agreed to accept jews was the fucking dominican republic. they would still have this reputation today, if not for the holocaust narrative making any kind of racial classification the ultimate taboo, thats in part why they invented it, the other part was to justify britain just awarding them someone elses country while they were still living in it! the fact that they got away with that is amazing, really think about that if nothing else, because something bad supposedly happened to them, they were just GIVEN a COUNTRY that not only didnt belong to them, but was inhabited already by muslims who believed it to be their sacred land. its insane! anyway hitler just wanted to deport them and he tried (google the haavara agreement, its literally excepted history that hitler tried like hell to deport them, which is a bad idea if your final solution is the complete annihilation of the jewish race and not to deport them) when the jews around the world declared war on germany (literally a new york times headline at the time) via staging a massive worldwide boycott using the papers they owned and all the political clout they purchased via owning the international banking cartels, germany had jews registered and placed into seperate housing so they could not try to stage another revolution, they had already done it several times in germany with the spartan uprising and others, eventually even successfully overthrowing the government during the aforementioned german revolution of 1919. and then he had them put into work camps when even then they revolted violently. america did exactly the same thing, putting its ethnic japanese population in internment camps for fear of a rebellion within the country or acts of sabatoge or espianage, literally the same thing at the same time for the same reason. there were no gas chambers, they literally tell you the crematoriums are reconstructions at the death camps, because hitler “had them blown up”. there were crematoriums at the death camps, remember typhus was pandemic at the time, but the showers were just plain old showers. no jews were gassed whatsoever, an american doctor traveled to the death camps in poland (except they were work camps) and performed hundreds of autopsies, in an attempt to prove that people were gassed, he found not one single body had been gassed via cyanide out of over a hundred autopsies performed, they had died from typhus, basically got dysentary and shit themselves until they starved, it sucks but it was happening all over the world even in the pacific theater. and again the timeline for the burning of just the six million is beyond impossible and remember he supposedly killed 11 million total in his impossible deathcamps with its impossible ovens.
  I know this is hard to swallow, but you have to swallow it, because its fucking IMPOSSIBLE, you cant burn that many bodies in that amount of time, with the crematoriums they supposedly had, remember all of them are “reconstructions” built by the soviets after the war by their own admission, because hitler supposedly blew them all up. so when people say “have you been to the death camps because i have!” what they are really saying is, i saw the work camps and the crematoriums built after the war, and i was lead as part of a tour into a shower where i was told a spooky story that made me sad. its fake. it has to be fake or else the laws of physics are fake. you can call me a nazi if you want, but what does that mean? its only bad because the nazis killed millions based on their race, but im telling you they literally couldnt have, not how they say that they did. remember its illegal to say what im saying in most of europe, france germany many others, and people are currently in prison, for just questioning it! i do believe jews were killed in eastern europe by germans and others, but you have to understand they were angry for the jews had been killing gentiles for years, thats what the “red terror” was! and there were many massacres of european christians at the hands of communist jews. so some towns killed them as soon as their hegemony was broken. i dont think thats right, but find me a war where this kind of thing doesnt happen and ill give you ten bucks. that other impossible thing? never fucking happened it couldnt have. i could go on forever, but the fact is its not on me to prove it didnt happen, its on someone to prove that it did. remember witness testimony is pretty weak, and you cant convict based on that alone, and evidence of work camps isnt evidence of 6 million gassed and incinerated jews, that is an extraordinary (impossible) claim that requires extraordinary (IMPOSSIBLE) evidence.
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mukhannath · 7 years ago
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I don't know why people keep expecting androgynous having to mean "hairless boy" like that "no hrt" person. Having hair and growth can be exactly what a nonbinary person wants or surprising changes might not be unwelcome in the end. I'm not on t but I do have a hormone imbalance thing that works like I were on t and thus can't start actual hrt bc my cocktail of hormone supplements is keeping my body functioning and taking additional t would lead into hospitalisation (according to hormone 1/5
specialists). So, when I actually started growing a very "manly" batch of chest hair (not to mention back, knee and arse hair (sorry, tmi) and a spotty beard) and my voice lowered on its own plus other stuff when my body started to rearrange itself, I went to see my gp. Long story short all of the changes are permanent and my gp and the specialists were beside themselves and there was all sort of talk about laser hair removal and support groups bc they expected this to cause me dysphoria bc what my body had done to itself was pretty much natural hrt. Now, the thing is I'm genderless and this whole unexpected hair thing and other stuff *is* making me feel *less* dysphoric (to the point of postponing top surgery indefinitely) because it's taking me farther away from being seen and feeling "typically female" and actually makes me feel fairly androgynous in a mix'n'match type of way with my features. So I turned lasers and the rest down. I admit I was baffled when my body started changing but I had no idea what was happening unlike people who knowingly start hrt. And when I've talked to enbies who are on hrt they're aware of how there's no set order re the changes and some might be unwelcome ones. But it's not that different to what binary trans people feel. Several of them take pauses with hrt to catch up with the changes and they don't necessarily like them either. Your body is changing pretty much according to what genes you have and you have little control over that. What we need is more open discussion about what hrt does in different doses and how far do you want to go with it and how it's ok to take a break from it. Not some person with a very narrow idea what androgyny is and something against nonbinary people especially with their motivation being the shortage of t and apparently it get's wasted on enbies who stop hrt. (Because of course a youtube video speaks for every enby and no-one has ever restarted hrt...) 5/5
wow first of all thank you for sharing and sending this to me, its cool to share your story ! youre right that I didn’t point out that person’s limited idea of what androgyny is and thats probably because i have that same limited view with regards to myself. this is probably a combination of dysphoria and internalized transphobia and you know what?? also internalized racism because a lot of things that are common in my race (like dark body hair!) dont fit my own personal goals. but I recognize that this is a very harmful ideal to apply across the board and thank u for pointing out that i didnt mention that sry abt that. 
youre also totally right that sometimes binary trans people arent fine with changes on HRT either. fuck lol like i dont think anyone is 100% happy with their body, even cis people going thru the expected puberty of their agab. so its pretty fuckin ridiculous to apply this double standard to specifically nonbinary people!! 
also i think being frank and practical for this, a lot of the time ‘androgyny’ for a nonbinary person means doing things that move them away from characteristics that have them perceived as their AGAB. this of course isnt true across the board but it certainly is in my case and a lot of other ppl ik. that person said “Estrogen won’t just make you a little more feminine. It will make you look like a woman” and im just like... ok well it doesnt seem to be doing either of those for me because i got on it late in the game (20) but if it keep me from “male” aging then im fuckin down for any side effects. 
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rqs902 · 4 years ago
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ah hyt’s issues with being too passive and not wanting to speak up about problems bc he’s worried about hurting other people’s feelings reminds me of what happened to jin fan on snzm this week :\ except hyt had to figure it out on his own bc no one else noticed and he didnt say anything about it to anyone. jin fan was urged to speak up but hyt had to mull it over in his head and stress over it until he could come to the decision that he needed to do something to help his team.
i respect that he came to that decision on his own and acted on it. as someone who’s relatively passive and conflict-avoidant myself, i think that takes a lot of resolve and courage. 
aw im happy xiao li got to sing too bc i really like his voice. what a talented boy! i think hyt is lucky the two of them give off the kind/gentle vibes so that he can pull them together. i dont know much about him, but i wonder if gem is right that hes had bad experiences with communicating with teammates (and aligning their hearts, as he said) before that’s led him to be more scared to be honest now. the 2 kids are like optimistic but you can tell hyt is so worried with their score ouch. 
wu xing’s voice is nice. im a wind player but with my limited knowledge of string instruments I feel like pengpeng’s playing is okay but not amazing. fsc’s bass is questionably out of tune?? or is it just me? something feels weird about his bass playing, it sounds kinda scratchy and sticks out to me too much, in like a weird way :\ but maybe its just because im used to hearing bass in classical music and not like this
LOL qiang ge being the buffer between jym and zk, are you sure youre gonna be okay child? the more i see qiang ge, the more smol he seems to me, like a cute child, who just happens to play the most blaring instrument LOL he seems very insecure about belonging on this show. he didnt want people to choose him unless they were absolutely sure in the first round, and then in the second round, he was so scared of ruining the next group that chose him and so grateful that they were willing to choose him and that they gave him so much encouragement to join their group. the fact that he needed that much encouragement and still felt undeserving is telling. the matching photo tshirts he custom ordered are cute! what a nice friend, to spend money on this to make everyone a little happier. i think its mature of him to encourage jym by saying he should think of the worst possible happening and try to accept it, to lessen his pressure. its still weird for me to realize people call zzn “nan ge” because he just seems so young in my mind lol but then you realize there are even younger kids on this show.
zhao ke’s rap was pretty good, i respect it. with that score i bet qiang ge’s gonna feel like it’s all his fault. i wonder if he blames himself or the instrument more for the fact that he was criticized for being too unvaried, but i feel like either of those is bad bc i feel like he should be proud of his instrument. 
aw maomao’s message and ljt’s response hahahhaha 
LOL ljt playing “who” and cutting it off abruptly. gao xin tai LOL 
ljt’s group’s perf def felt more complete. his voice is so nice, i still love it. i will say, i remember zhao tianyu sang this song on mrzz. i wonder if ljt remembers that too. 
hmm i really liked kxy’s singing voice, i thought it was really good, nicer than mz’s LOL but honestly i feel like i also understand from the teacher’s point of view, that he wasted their time and just didnt take their advice when they were trying to help him. hmm he seems likes hes very stubborn in doing what he believes, which isnt bad, he’s standing up for what he wants, but also then he immediately started crying when questioned about it. which makes me think hes not very confident in his choice and/or feels victimized/attacked for just doing what he wants. either way, kxy has shown he cries very easily lol. but i have mixed feelings about whether he’s handling criticism well. im not sure how old he is but he seems young 
LOL muji and swh just being like DELETE to wjy and being like straight up “it sounds bad” HAH im glad at least having two of them on the same page can put wjy in his place more LOL 
during the perf was muji holding the pick in his mouth? lol muji is such a 寶藏 with the bass guitar along with all his unique talents. this was a pretty epic perf, i thought theyd get a better score than that.
hm interesting that the uptown funk people told them tencent they needed to pay them more and tencent DIDNT, but they were still nice enough to approve their use of the song anyway bc of their “sincere” messages. wtf tencent. im pretty sure they have money to pay them more lol.
i kinda think yrz still seems a bit stiff to me onstage, like look at xiao zhi, hes literally so comfortable and free and hes so enjoying playing his bass guitar hes like having so much fun and is super into the music. at first i wasnt sure how well him and zy would mesh but wow hes really owned up to the avocado name LOL i feel like him and zy are really really caring older bros to yrz and hopefully yrz is super grateful bc he got super lucky. 
LOL TYLER FREAKING OUT OVER YRZ’S SMILE 
“NA GE XIAO RONG!!!!” 
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HAHAHHAHAHAH 
i think it does say a lot that this perf got everyone like on their feet and grooving along, i see why they ranked 1st! 
kinda sad wsh was like yea no ones gonna notice us and then tencent proceeds to give them 5 seconds of practice room footage and the mentors are all shocked by the lowness of their score
hm :\ i kinda wanted to hear more about how they resolved the conflict between rainbow feeling too restricted by da xi’s more methodical approach to music. i think thats an interesting discussion, because i think both sides have their merits, so what kind of blend of a compromise will they come up with? and it does say a lot about their personalities. rainbow also feels similarly hesitant to reveal his feelings because of his friendship with da xi, which reminds me of hyt yet again but then this group got 5 seconds of footage in comparison so we dont really know how any of this got resolved. also how do they deal with mty sleeping and disappearing all the time?? i do think its kind of cute how mty seems to bend down and really direct his speaking towards the audience when talking to them. i really like their performance, this music style and fun-ness!
LOL the way ruiyang and yingge look at tyler is literally with such adoration wtf hahahahahaa and tyler buying them the bunny hats wtf this is so cute. feels very parental LOL theyre so supportive of him and helping him shine and tyler’s just like a child bringing them happiness LOL i think its notable that yingge says he feels like theyre all using their strengths in this perf bc thats #goals 
why do i feel like tyler and ruiyang ave absorbed yingge’s fashion LOL
THIS AESTHETIC 
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i think u can tell like they (yingge?) put a lot of effort into communicating with the production team about their stage design. its not just about the music for them. lol this perf is shot like a music videoooo
ok im hesitant to comment on tyler’s trumpet playing bc it’s not very clean sounding to me, but you can tell hes putting a lot of effort into the small details still. and if hes been practicing a ton, i know it can be painful to try to play into that kind of mouthpiece cleanly with tired lips. he has yet to amaze me but it seems like he’s working hard so i respect that. hes also very lucky to be in a group with two supportive geges. like ps said, i think it is notable that ruiyang is doing so well in a genre of music he wasnt previously into. and yingge’s personality must be some kind of strong to really influence the other 2 so much 
aw tyler crying out of happiness and ruiyang just bursting out laughing and pats tyler’s head with a “早講嗎!" bc he was worried about tyler being sad hahahahaha he just sounded so taiwanese there it made me happy. aw tyler must be really well loved by all the geges who crowd him with hugs when they see him crying like xiao zhi ahahah
oof samhar being brought to tears when gem notes how hard he worked on the composition. (oo xiao zhi helped him! - that’s it, im curious how old he is, so i went to his weibo and he’s just a little older than me! born in 95. but then i saw he and zy have made some conflict-confronting posts today and im like .-. what happened? not sure whats up, but it seems like theyre generally okay, fans seem mad tho) 
actually tbh totally makes sense to me why xiao zhi, rainbow, and yingge’s groups are the top 3 in that order, like their stages were really good and memorable. 
ouch qiang ge feeling all the guilt and like he doesn’t have the skills to do better :( why is the show ok with jym acting this way? why is there a lack of communication that leads him to not understand what’s going on with the votes? they chase after him, he’s moping, they just film him and are barely encouraging enough to get him to come back at the very last minute. im sure he’s very frustrated but its also unprofessional and disrespectful of him to leave like that. how does that make his group mates feel that hes just gone? this is all very questionable to me. 
wait i havent been keeping up with their current rankings but wtf the kids who are like super worried are like ranked super high??? like im assuming they’ll be fine?? like jym and hyt’s group members are all relatively high... (I realize now why hyt got so much screentime LOL hes #1....) im surprised tyler is so low and i wonder if he’ll get more popular after this ep lol 
anyyywayyy so it looks like they’re having a party and elims next week so im sure thatll be an emotional roller coaster... and snzm is having elims next week too so thats just great... double the disaster 
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