#i dont think a straight person would get so yknow about it

[dick-chugger]

Thinking about this always

[baberoe-archive]

top 10 insane bucky moments?

god where do i start.

perhaps basic of me but getting drunk and then saying he's fine then asking curt to punch him in the face and then howling. perhaps number one bucky moment for me. just absolutely falling apart. i hear that brother. do you ever think about how eps 1-3 he never really lets buck see this side of him. and its only when curt dies that buck is privy to it. yeah i dont think about that either

"maaaaaarge...." is to me far more insane than scissoring in the yard. like at least when he's provoking fights it can be written off as restlessness, but mocking your best friend for taking comfort in his sweetheart's letter with the most sickeningly jealous expression in the world AND right in front of everyone's salad.......... this man is a medieval peasant self-flagellating in the street.

trading his sheepskin that buck hated to go on his first mission after buck went down. he didn't even think about it he just saw jack and ran over and did it. and then when brady asked him about it. he just straight up said "buck always hated that jacket" bitch WHAT

provoking col harding for no reason unprovoked. in front of the men!!! his self destructive tendencies and distaste for authority compel me

also when he starts yelling at that nazi guard on the march. that's such a good moment i get the impression that most of what bucky does is (to some extent) calculated like he knows hes being a dick he knows he flying too close to the sun and thats what he wants yknow he wants to egg people on but this moment he just completely lets go thats the pure thoughtless rage thats been simmering the whole series. god.

offscreen moment (forgive me) but not letting them send bucks footlocker back to the states. and then the 100th kept it for a full year like what did he say??? how desperate was he that no one could bring themselves to move bucks footlocker after a year???

stalag baseball scene. when you put on your off-putting and hard to be around-sona because you feel yourself to be so abandoned and abused that any semblance of gentleness would make you bare your teeth and bite. when you want to bite. when you dont want to bite.

willingly got a dart thrown at his face so he could give his boy best friend a bike so they could bike around together. ohhh my god bitch. down so bad its pathetic

whatever the hell he did to get on the regensberg mission and also the regensberg mission in general. pushing one of the gunners out of the way cause they were going for buck. "reserve command pilot" or whatever. i know what you are.

i dont remember the scene exactly but before the mission when they are getting their gear and hes like "call me sir" and crank goes "none of the people we're bombing today shot down buck" and then he just goes. absolutely silent. nothing to say to that. outline in the shape of a person moment.

[mayxo-hxh]

Im about to get controversial.

Out of chrollo, illumi and hisoka, hisoka is canonically the least likely to flirt to get anything he wants, if at all.

A lot of people think he's a natural flirt but I fear I couldn't have disagreed more. He only "flirted" a single time and that was solely to piss off machi, knowing she'd never agree. Hot take? He would've never asked if he knew she'd agree.

Also, bro's the biggest humanphobe in the anime. He keeps his distance from everyone. The only human physical contact he ever made was through fighting people. (If you're a person thats interested in seeing more evidence, I have an entire long thread about it on twitter that I do plan on posting here soon)

so u cannot give me 1 reason for hisoka to flirt with someone at a random bar but chrollo and illumi? i can think of a few.

chrollo, he already canonically flirts to get what he wants. straight up goes on dates gets a suit and shit. he has no reputation among the general public that hes concerned of that isnt the spider. Illumi? He's a manipulator. I HIGHLY doubt he never flirted to get something in his life from people who are too easy to win over. He's someone that wouldn't care what people think of him. He's also anonymous. People have no idea who tf he is anyways. If it affected the zoldyck reputation? Thats a different story.

Hisoka? he would fucking NEVER. Him specifically? HE HAS A REPUTATION. And whats that reputation? That hes an absolute disgusting freak that no one should dare to approach. He kills people. He fights live and makes sure the audience is always disgusted and weirded out by his actions and performances. You look at him and you should immediately look away and pray he hasn't seen you.

So riddle me this. If his entire shtick is making sure everyones afraid of him and avoids him, then why the hell would he get himself a reputation that makes him approachable????

Why would he get himself a reputation that makes you, as a person who only ever heard of him picking people up, want to approach him.

On top of that, I just.. don't see him picking random people up..??? random weaklings that dont even know nen????? he literally treats them like trash that inconveniences his time. You're saying he'd EVER give them the privilege of sleeping with him???

And then you'd say, oh so he'd sleep with strong people! HERES THE THING. Why would he sleep with them..... when he can fight them. Him getting off from fighting comes NOWHERE to actual sex. What people don't understand is that he gets off to killing people and seeing them crumble in front of him when they realize theyre going to die. Torturing people to death. What's... that got to do with like. yknow. actual sex bro 😭😭😭😭😭😭

this turned into a huge rant probably but do you know how genuinely depressing it is seeing a unique character like hisoka that gains lust through FIGHTING and KILLING reduced to. sex addict in fics. Like. be so fucking serious right now. He called himself a FIGHT ADDICT in the manga. Can I see more of him actually spending his time killing and fighting people instead of whatever the hell bros doing with a random npc.

Anyways this is also why I hc him as asexual/demisexual NEXTTTT

[rotthepoet]

Continuing my mean lorenzo berkshire brainrot, he is so enemies to lovers coded.

Like he’s a 1990’s movie bully. Yknow that scene where Malfoy sends Potter a little animated note of him being struck by lightning??(i feel like it was prisoner of azkaban) yeah imagine that being thrown at your head. Like. Everyday in class

Hes like mean and pathetic and its WILD dude.

He so just shoves you when no ones looking- straight up pushes you into a fountain-

You dont even know what you did to get on his bad side! He doesnt even remember!

Its probably because this pretty(gender neutral) person(you) showed him up in class after he answered a question embarrassingly wrong. He wasnt a fan of that. No one can be that good looking and smart at the same time, that bitch is cheating!

He will be your downfall if you let him. Like. Sabotaging all the way. Your life will be hell.

His friends kinda noticed how hes different around you tho. Like he can be mean but not VIOLENT.

Its Theo that figures out its a crush. And he doesnt let him live it down.

“Ohhh there goes your girlfriend, gonna go trip her again to see up her skirt you creep?”

Things like that but im not a posh Italian boy in a British boarding school so, like, phrase it better.

There are two ways you could get him to stop.

Slapping him or crying infront of him.

Both would make him slow tf down and short circuit.

1. If you slap him, hes going to look down at you with the dumbest look. Like. No thoughts behind those wide eyes. Scream at him, shove him, stomp away. he raises a hand to his cheek and grins so big because you touched him! He lowkey gets a little bit ✨freaky✨and imagines it all over again later. The bullying stops. He cant stop staring at you and following you everywhere though. Youre not sure which is worse lmao.

2. Bless your heart if you cry infront of him. He feels so bad suddenly its not even funny. Hes like half hugging you awkwardly to ‘comfort’ you and is lowkey trying to apologize without saying the words “im sorry” its kinda just pathetic and weird. If you run away crying he feels like a dick and leaves you alone for a bit :/ the cutie is crying and its his fault wtf this is so twisted! He might buy you a little treat to make up for it.

Once he falls he falls HARD. like downright obsessed. Blaise had to knock him upside the head because he wouldn’t shut up about you.

He’ll be talking to a girl and see you and literally push her away by the head so he can walk and talk to at you.

“Hey hows your day going? Did you do something with your hair? Youre going to potions, yeah? Let me walk you.”

And youre like. What?? He was telling you that you reek not even a month ago?? Is he gaslighting you? This new form of bullying is weirddd

and then he starts presenting you with gifts and trying to hold your hand like wtf?? He blows you a kiss from his broom on the quidditch field. Steals the damn mic and says “this win was for ___” and points at you and youre like “hello??? Who are you?? Get away from me?”

But eventually you fold and it turns out hes a nice guy. Somehow. You sometimes look baxk and think “how did i get here?? Where the hell am i??” But then he gives you a big ol smooch and it all gets better.

[fae-morrigan]

Someone put a post (where they admit they straight up dont know these characters lol, and also spell damian as 'damien' so like. yknow.) in the tags saying that if you're a fan of Jon & Jay, you shouldn't buy super son. Well, as the crowned CEO of Jay & Jon, I'm here to tell you guys that you absolutely should.

Super Son did the amazing thing of hitting several marks that I predicted while still managing to surprise me in how they hit them. Which is high praise for any story: A great narrative should be able to both meet reasonable audience expectations (i.e, staying in character, setup payoff) WHILE STILL throwing in curveballs that tell you something new.

There's a lot I want to analyze and get into, namely how I think the rooftop conversation between Jon & Nia is really brilliantly done in what it says about both characters, but mainly I've been thinking a lot about how great those last few pages were and how I think Sina absolutely nails how Jon & Jay's specific issues interact with each other.

Jay's always been a blunt person. From their first meeting back in SOKE 2, hes said what he thinks, and rarely does he try and soften himself. More than that, his bluntness is often a shield from vulnerability, which Jay struggles with the whole scene. It makes total sense, after what hes experienced (re-traumatization at the hands of a friend) that he's displaying that trait again.

Jon, however, is immediately vulnerable. This is the most poignant confession of the issue: Not even in the amazing sequence of Nia helping him make a place in the darkness (look, its back, thanks isabel!) do we get this admission of fear.

And Jay, like always, embraces him. Sidenote, LOVE how they got in the thing Jon does where he's constantly tucking his face in people's shoulders during hugs.

But the moment ends, and we get here. First of all, cold af. I could feel the aura before I turned the page.

Second of all: Jay is totally valid in feeling this way. And it makes perfect sense that he would.

Sara was his everything. Getting her back was one of his main motivations in SOKE. Because of Nia's actions, she died horribly (do you know what happens to a person when they fall from that sort of height? I do. Its AWFUL.) for an unjust cause. Of course he's glad she can't hurt anyone else!

And that's when we get to my FAVORITE PART! Oh how I love this bit. Because like. You understand why Jon's angry- Its a harsh thing for Jay to say! Nia was the one who kept him sane while he was trapped in his own mind! But Jay, like always, is RIGHT: Jon DOESN'T get it. How could he?

Jon Kent will NEVER, ever, be put in this position. Out of universe, his parents are Clark Kent and Lois Lane. They'll ALWAYS come back. Hell, the fact they'll always come back is something Ma LITERALLY says to Jon in SOKE. He will never, ever have to know this pain.

In universe, Jon's a white american. Despite being queer, despite being an alien, he'll never know what its like to be this kind of collateral, delegated as pawns in a greater war for 'freedom'. That is what killed Sara at the end of the day: imperialism.

This next bit hurts my heart. Great job, guys!

For one: Jon claims he's not excusing the mistakes Nia made, but by downplaying it like this... yes he is. But did you catch that part? Right at the start of that bubble?

"I'm going to fight every day to make up for my own part in this."

That's where it clicked for me. Something I had been hoping for since Nicole first called them twin flames.

He's projecting.

Of COURSE he's defending Nia. Of COURSE he wants Jay to forgive her. It isn't just about the fact that she gave him support, it isn't just the dreams, its the fact that... well. If Jay can't forgive her... how could he EVER forgive HIM?

THIS is where the fact that Jon and Nia are so similar as character SINGS. They become mirrors to each other, evaluating their own self worth through the other, at the unintentional expense of the people they've hurt.

Jay's right, though. Again. Its almost like he's the embodiment of the truth or something. He doesn't HAVE to do anything.

When he starts crying though, I immediately was RUINED. This is the first time we have EVER seen him cry before during his entire existence of a character. And its not really even because his mom is dead (though yes, that) and its not even because of the argument. Its because Jay fundamentally wants to be understood, and he's not getting that.

Which is important for the next bit:

I want to first backtrack a bit to Son of Kal El again, specifically, issue fourteen, right here.

Hello, two-panel sequence that succinctly describes these two as characters. How convenient you are for me, a guy analyzing a work that isn't written prose.

Jon isn't good at letting go, for better or for worse. The things he cares about stay with him, and when something or someone tries to exit his life, he clings to them with all his might.

Jay however, both selflessly and selfishly, is willing to let go first if he thinks its better for the other person. To me this line so effortlessly summarizes who Jay is- he's a person who's accustomed to not having things, and will leave before it hurts and he gets too attached.

And that thought is ALL over this scene. Jay, who begins to let go, Jon, who both literally and physically CLINGS to jay, practically begging him to stay.

(Sidenote. This is like, the third time Jay mentions breaking up when Jon starts acting up. Good for you king, keep that white boy on his toes, let him know he ain't all that.)

Every little detail of this four panel sequence is killing me. "My worst nightmare is not having a home with you in it." His greatest desire. The thing that kept tipping him off in every fake reality Nia constructed for him- Jay's absence. Him wiping the tear of Jay's cheek. Jay walking away from him.

But what really gets me is how on this page, Jon talks about them as 'we', while Jay is firmly stuck in 'I.'

This is what made me LOSE MY MARBLES at three in the morning. Just utterly fucking off my rocker in a straightjacket talking to myself.

Because this is what JON wants. But is it what JAY wants?

Jon never asks.

What about what Jay fears? What about the life that HE wants? What if he doesn't want San Francisco? What if the life he wants is the life he HAD before everything went wrong? Jon outright says he wants a fresh start. But Jay, Jay's someone with such deep connections to what he just lost, what he likely WANTS to get back. His country. His mother. His sense of self. But. He says yes.

(Sidenote. FIRST I LOVE YOU WOOOOOOOOOO) To quote my buddy Dami: Oh, the drama of needing a future with someone who can't get over the past.

It is left unclear, by the end, whether or not Jay is saying yes to this because he genuinely wants to, or if he's only saying yes because he doesn't want to lose Jon, too. Jon doesn't stop to question whether or not Jay's only reaching after him because Jon's walking away. We, the audience, are left to ponder that for ourselves.

How much of Jay saying yes is him just accepting that this is the best he's going to get? That he's never going to be understood because nobody wants to understand?

He's an afterthought to Nia, an obstacle at best, and to Jon he's a particularly handsome prop in this little fantasy he has of running away and starting new. He's either not thought of at all, or when he is thought about, it's in the context of how he can emotionally fulfill the other person And you get why Jon did this. He's desperate, he's hurting, he just got tangible evidence that the time he has with the people he loves isn't ever guaranteed. He's been needing space from Clark and Lois for MONTHS because god knows they haven't been fulfilling his emotional needs. In a very real sense, Jay is who he has.

But wanting someone to stay with you so much that you'll... Not even ignore, but just not ever consider what they may want. The intentional isolation, moving halfway across the country away from all support systems. The need to cling to someone.

It reminds me of... something. Someone.

Don't tell Jon I made this comparison. He'll kill himself. Jon and Ultraman ARE similar. They're both such deeply lonely people who cling very tightly and even though it manifests in different ways and even though they have different core thoughts about it. The effect at the end of the day is the same, isn't it?

Is loving Jay not a brutal act of destruction?

There's so many more details about this story I love. Jon & Nia's conversation being vague enough that you have no idea how Jon meant what he told her but you KNOW how NIA took it (girl you can do better hes literally ugly!). Jon breaking a pillar by bonking his head against it (LMFAO). The pretty lies vs ugly truth dichotomy of Jay vs Nia here.

But this one scene, man. This one fucking scene takes the cake. STELLAR work all around. Every panel counts.

This better lead into a full Superman & Gossamer run or SOMETHING or I'm going to have WORDS with DC's editorial staff.

[torantuga]

are.you.an.angel..

I've been looking for AleNoah as dads my entire life man!!! You're like.. sent from above!!

..

wait how did they get MK then..

did Noah and Emma have MK then divorce, and then Noah gained custody..or is she just adopted..

I don't know if you mind me doing this but like,

I like to imagine :3.. that Aleheather broke up and Nemma actually got married but divorced so then MK is just like..there. Then boom Noah and Alejandro meet again and they're like "btw did you know in World Tour I loved you" "fr!? Me.me too!" "do you wanna get married" "yea!!!!"

yea. (I may have gotten Raj into the mix..bleh.)

Wow this is incredibly long sorry about that drink water and have a lovely day!!!!!

-⏰

OKAY I ACCIDENTALLY MAY IR MAY HAVE NOT MADE A CHART THAT EXPLAINS THE AU THANKS TO THIS ASK (IN MY EYES) !!

i personally dont like the idea of the women in the respective relationships abandoning the men to let them be gay w each other, esp since so many people that write similar things end up making emma just straight up abandon the family cause of stress. its way too convinient yknow, jst my opinion, and it makes emma look bad (which shes way too awesome) i think she would be very close w the mudaliar-burromuerto family but as a close friend/honorary aunt sorta way.

but your idea of the au is cool! i like it.

this is kinda of like a long answer to your question being like. how did they have mk.....

okay so.

how did they end up together? i inspired myself from a fic that is literally just noah being alejandro's only visitor in the hospital post-WT. they become friendly and, since the burromuerto family sees alejandro as an embarrassment for being too vulnerable and letting himself lose the million dollars in front of many people, leaving him being kicked out, they eventually end up moving together! its kind of a slowburn college romance if im being honest. and once theyre juniors/seniors in college, they end up getting together.

so. hooow do they adopt mk? since its from birth? wouldnt they be super young? EXACTLY

theyre young parents due to alejandro being pressured from his side of the family to at least get a child if he's going to keep being a failure. this hurts ale deeply and he genuinely starts to panic, thinking he should raise a kid as soon as possible. he manages to convince noah that its true baby fever and that they'll be wonderful parents, even though normally "ideal" parents marry and then have children.

they search for a while and eventually come across someone who was thinking of adoption whilst pregnant, and the three of them worked very hard to make it possible. so in 2007, MK is born, and adopted into the mudaliar-burromuerto family. (i do not know SHIT about adoption so i wont make much detail about it)

of course, not being married and having a child was also critizised, so they quickly married around a year or two later. (it took a while to cut the burromuerto family out of his life, but back then ale was very young and very easily manipulated by his family)

so, around 6 years later, they adopt another kid, which was already a year old, but who really didnt have a name. he was dropped off at an orphanage when he was around 6 months old, but he didnt seem to be registrated anywhere. ale n noah, curious, took on the role to foster care this kid and came up w a name for him, which alejandro chose, nicolás. they adopted him soon after

so yeah full story!!! may be susceptible to change!! wahoo!!

[starwikia]

suicide cw

look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 

ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.

this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.

He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!

you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.

it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 

what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 

am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!

yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).

The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.

[luffyvace]

Ace x amab reserved reader

just on a whim bc i barely see enough content for males and since ace is my fav here ya go! :)

(small tidbits of spoilers but not really)

ace isn’t the most eccentric guy to live persay

but because of his straight forward personality it more so seems like it

which a part of it is

but your way different than him

your a fly solo typa guy

you’d rather stay to yourself and do your own thing

ace respects that he gets why

people can be a real pain sometimes

so if anyone is being overly pushy with your comfort zone??

never fear!! the brave knight, Ace is here!!

he’ll stand up for you if he can tell you don’t have the social energy to do so

he’s very good at protecting his territory

he’s been doing it his whole life

he loves you with his whole heart

so he understands if you need space

ace introduces you to marco and the two of you hit it off

marco’s energy isn’t over the top so it’s just enough that you can handle

perfect for you

same with izo!!

so the four of you become a little group!

ace could nap any time of the day

so if your ever feeling a little drained?

nap time is all the time :)

go and snuggle up to ace and he won’t reject it at all!

he loves you!!

but please not in public honey

its embarrassing and marco won’t stop teasing him about it

ace would do anything he can for you to keep you comfy

this rooms’ too loud?

yeah, he agrees. let’s move to the next room!

he would get a little concerned if you don’t want any human interaction though

from trauma to purely liking to be alone

“you’ve gotta get sunlight m/n!! you cant just coop up like a vampire! yknow? it won’t kill you to just see people right?”

i mean he loves having you all to himself but it’s kinda unhealthy!

”you can’t shun yourself from life all because you dont wanna be around people n/n! life isn’t gonna wait for you to get out of that dark room of yours yknow?”

he’ll tease you and gently push you out of your shell occasionally

but for the most part he understands

he’d love to have deep conversations with you!!

since you don’t talk to people all that often he knows you have thoughts to get out

so talk to him!!

he’ll listen all day to his sweet m/n’s voice, as he likes to say

gossippp!

(if you like that)

he’s kinda nosy and since he knows your always observing others he thinks you simply must have some juicy gossip on people!

also don’t bottle up your emotions on him!

like i said talk to him!

your his boyfriend!

his precious boyfriend!

he wouldn’t want you going through anything on your own when you already have him!!

especially since he knows what that feels like

he also knows your a good listener

so he’ll go to you about his past or father and such once you guys get real deep in the relationship

or if you already are

either way ace loves you just as you are

he will support you and at least try to understand where your coming from to help keep you comfortable :)

ahh these are pretty short but yeah i hope anyone who reads enjoys them

[starlit-dreaming]

[idea] the spiteful fake dating au

inspo from this post [click here]

obligatory tag (im an attention whore and therefore i summon thee): @lithi @hwang-lucas

tl;dr if you dont wanna click on the link:

"i know we could half-ass it, but i would never fake mistreat my fake husband, how dare you" which reads like athy to me

and

"my baby cousins are probably screwed when it comes to their chances of turning out normal, but I’d like them to have one healthy example in their life" which can pass as a caring uncle lucas

.

the setting and my Vision:

modern au, lucathy are probably mid-20s or early 30s im thinking??? maybe kinda like the ons/fwb au where athy's like. 28 and lucas is gonna be 30

so as the lines i've quoted state, lucas is gonna be a caring uncle whose brothers have shit show marriages. a train wreck and not gonna be healthy at all (oldest has a falling apart 15 year marriage and kids were their solution of slapping tape on the problems; youngest has a hateful wife and is a doormat probably; i need a reminder on whether or not lucas is the youngest but im gonna treat him as the middle bro atm cause its the Vibes).

and yeah, he wants Nothing^tm to do with his family, but his nieces and nephews deserve to see a healthy relationship to have as an example and damn does he hate his in-laws more than his actual family

so he asks athy to be his fake wife

(i feel like it'd be funny if they signed a marriage certificate just in case lucas deals with paranoid family (when really he's just paranoid and athy's an overthinker who HELPED him get paranoid at the thought), then they got drunk, and accidentally submitted the paperwork and just straight up forgot

"wdym you guys ACTUALLY filed the paperwork?????????" -- helena probs

"oh shit does that mean we got married fr???" -- athy, before the panic settles in

it becomes an inside joke among their friends after the panic of it wears off because now they're pretty much committed to the bit for the sake of lucas' nieces and nephews so now there are jokes about "where's your wife/husband" and "" etc etc)

athy's gonna constantly overthink it (and desperately trying to avoid ever mentioning it to her parents because her mom would be so disappointed that there wasnt a wedding and claude might kill lucas if he makes athy cry)

plus she's 100% gonna be ready to fite lucas's shitty relatives if they say something bad about him

side note: diana 100% thinks that lucas is athy's long-time bf so she's always joking with claude that lucas is finally gonna drop down on one knee any day now and claude, being a super big grump, is just "at least its not that alpheus kid"

little do they know that lucas became a legit in-law (although they still invite him for family dinners, and when its mentioned that athy's parents treat him as family, lucas's parents and grandparents take that as a CHALLENGE)

athy being petty by having a sickeningly sweet relationship and talking about how wonderful lucas is as a husband and partner because of how much she just straight up hates one of the sister in-laws

i'm self-indulgent, so i'm gonna have the classic "my sister in-law tried to sleep with my husband" stories

also idk if its just me but when it comes to fake dating aus (which i'm a SUCKER for) i think its a++++++++ when one of them casually goes "yknow if we were actually doing this for realsies, we'd probably be making out in a closet rn" and the other person sweating cause that sounds infinitely better than what they're doing rn

ALSO

the casual "oh yeah athy's crazy about that kinda shit" or "lucas would absolutely hate that lmao" and just FLEXING on everyone about how good of a partner they are to the other

and lucas, who originally suggested that they don't have to do any lovey-dovey stuff and that they can just be the same as always, ends up getting a fuming athy who more or less goes "my REPUTATION would be at stake if people found out that we broke up just because i wasn't being a loving and caring partner, so hell no!!!!!"

aksulifdfhbjdkshf i'm running on like,,,,,,, 5 hours of sleep and havent slept in like,,,,, 17 hours now

so i'm just gonna leave this unedited all-over-the-place mess here

[faerynova]

Thoughts on. Caesar Salazar ?:3

oughhg césar... he is so autistic (derogatory) (im autistic its fine i can say that)

what i love about him is that he has NO empathy but also SUCH strong morals. he invented nanites TO HELP PEOPLE. he wanted to cure diseases and make the world a better place but also hes completely incapable of understanding that his actions have consequences and can hurt other people

like i straight up think he does not realize how much he hurt rex with like. the control collar and also yknow putting him through fucking EVERYTHING to do with the metananites and not telling rex his plans. césar isnt a "the end justifies the means" kind of guy its just that he does not realize that his means are harmful in the first place

ALSO SPEAKING OF REX IF I THINK TOO HARD ABOUT CÉSAR AND REX ESPECIALLY THEM AS KIDS I WILL START CRYING YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

CÉSAR CARES SO MUCH ABOUT REX AND AS MUCH AS HE DOES DO THINGS FOR THE GOOD OF PEOPLE IN GENERAL HE WILL WATCH THE WORLD BURN TO SAVE HIS LITTLE BROTHER

i think about his introduction so fucking much. calls him mijo. immediately clocks providence as sketchy organization (that may or may not be experimenting on his brother who he knows has crazy nanite abilities and would thus be a prime target for that shit) and is like alright rex im getting you the fuck OUT OF HERE

also like césar skipped six whole years. the last time he saw rex, rex was TEN. thats his BABY brother. and im sure césar has some trouble like... realizing. that rex is older and can be treated as, yknow, a capable person. which ofc informed his decision to keep rex out of the loop every step of the way. (also i headcanon that he and rex have a 12 year age gap. and now that césar has his time skip, theres a 6 year age gap)

also césar has a doctorate?? zagRS refers to him as Dr. César Salazar. this man has a phd. i also headcanon that he was actually one of *those* super smart autistic kids who started going to college at like 13 or some shit and ended up with an engineering doctorate at 20/21 or something.

its like 4 in the goddamn am if this makes no sense then im blaming that

anyway tldr i am shaking him inside a pringles can i love him i hate him im gonna put him through the horrors

[dragon-queen21]

HIII MEE AGAINN i need to talk about baby giyuu because im a sucker for him and he NEEDS more agere content

this ones also kinda sad because, im sad, giyuus sad, we are all sad, yknow?

-hmmm i dont know im a sucker for the idea that he wouldnt know he particularly regresses until someone finds him like that and after taking care of him, the moment hes okay and big again they have to explain that no giyuu, your not just tired. your tired AND a age regressor. and that being SHOCKING for giyuu man, my boy has self loathing thoughts on a good day, imagine hin having to come to terms with his brain making hin act like a baby for a while is probably worse than finding out he was a hashira (haha manga moment)

- and in that case,, vent regressor ☹️

most of the time he wont be little until hes too foggy to do anything he needs to, and then that accompanied by the fact he thinks no one likes him, so now hes lonely and hes too little he thinks to be alone, ah, this is a recipe for a meltdown huh?

him on a mission with one other hashira or something on a time where he is too foggy, and he makes a big mistake and the other person there gets mad at him , and starts yelling at him saying that that mistake could have cost them their lives, not entirely in a bad way, the others just concerned for him because tomiokas not the kinda guy to make a big mistake like that. and giyuu is not in the right place to be scolded like that and just bursts into tears, like straight up wailing, covering his face, kicking his feet, and the other one there is confused, why is tomioka having a.. dare they say tantrum?

^i feel like after alls well and good, hes big again, hes apologized, he realizes just how important it is to take care of his little side.

- i feel like tengen would be a good cg for him, also would probably be the first to know giyuus a little. amazing hearing and all, could probably hear baby babbles from a couple miles away, and at first hes like oh i wonder who that is 🤔🤨 yknow in a suuppeeer gossipy way because, we all know he gossips come ON now, but when he makes his way to the water hashiras estate hes like oh! oh. and now hes confronted with A) go inside and take care of him or B) leave and never speak of this again.

spoiler alert, he picks A. i mean, assuming giyuus little here, it wouldnt be that hard, i mean, his wives are littles too its not like hes not expierenced, and giyuus not exactly too much to handle so..

OH MY GOD THIS WRAPPING AROUND TO THE FIRST POINT HERE WHATT “im a sucker for the idea that he wouldnt know he particularly regresses until someone finds him like that” IM JUST LIKE THWT no can you see i have like the same three ideas in my head

- anyhow i feel like giyuu would be a not only a smaller regressor but definitely a easy going kid. he does NOT have the energy to do anything else but sit and babble, maybe on a good day he’ll even play with some toys (tengen bought him) (tengens his main cg for a LONG time)

- i think he’d go to a few meetings, uh, not quite little but foggy, a indication he needs to be little. on those times he wont really, listen to the master, just nod his head with ecerything he says because he does not trust himself to talk right now, and will normally ask shinobu for everything important when hes big again.

it does not go well when kagaya (i think, the master) asks giyuu a question and giyuu is fighting demons to not only answer, but answer without slurring words. he thinks ge did pretty good, untill the other hashira are giving him strange looks, and tengen has a look of sheer “oh godohgodohgod” and hes big enough to know hes absolutely cooked

OKIEIM DONE IMDONEBYAYYYYY well oh no because this is so sad um!!!!!!!? sorry?!!! most times these asks go based off my mood sorry for making giyuu a angst fest!!!! byeeeeee

📷

I do know. Do you know how much of my angst writing comes because I’m once again depressed? Well let me tell you, it’s most of it. Y’all should see my ao3 haha. Agere angst is some of my favorite things to write about :3

You and me 🤝 projecting onto characters

~~~

~Giyu: “No no, I’m just tired. Nothing else. Maybe a bit dissociative.”

The pillar that found him: “no, no you’re definitely regressing”

~Giyu pushing himself to the very limit because he’s already a burden, acting like a child, not having control over the way his mind fogs and he wants to do nothing more than curl up in someone’s lap and cry. But Shinobu reminds him that everyone hates him, acting like a baby won’t help even if her words hurt more than anything and Tanjiro’s hurt, his baby brother who he failed to protect, and he fails everyone around him, and why can’t he just be a child when everything was okay and simple…

~at the very least he has to do something to manage the headspace. So he lets himself be small, but do nothing more than sit and wallow in the feeling. He doesn’t deserve to be comfortable.

~Tengen finding out he’s a regressor (why him? because dad Tengen obviously :3 ) and trying to buy the little comfort items like blankets and a pacifier

~Oh hey lol I wrote this part before reading more of what you wrote. XD Can you tell I have a one track mind for my favorite characters?

~Giyu just lets himself go with whatever is happening around him, not enough energy to put up a fight. The only thing that might happen is he would start crying if he got overwhelmed

~What that’s such a good plot reference. Giyu trying to hide his regression and being like “I’m doing a great job, no one suspects a thing.”

~Tengen meanwhile: Dying. Actually dying of not only second hand embarrassment but also of the urge to grab his boy and take him far away from the disaster that is no doubt about to play out before him

[lesbiandarvey]

i am just in here to ask for more deleted scenes plz 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

after work in harvey’s apartment donnas stirring martinis in a three piece suit harvey walks out in a silk robe + thigh highs and garter and heels! and takes the drink out of donnas hand sips it and straddles her on the couch

awkward mother’s day brunch of donna, harvey, his mom, and her parents. her parents have been explicitly instructed not to bring up The Thing They Dont Talk About aka the fact harvey and lily didnt speak to each other for 15 years because of his parents’ shitty marriage but obviously it comes up. also they all argue about who will pay the check

donna and harvey are forced to attend a dinner party at louis and sheila’s while in the middle of a fight

something in the early seasons where donna and harvey have a Spa Weekend planned and its all theyre talking about all episode and then for Plot Reasons they cant go so they decide to have facials at the office. scene of mike walking in on them in harveys office in identical bathrobes with cucumbers over their eyes

donna harvey hot yoga scene

something something donna and harvey both have dates with “a cute guy in the building!” and then they realize theyre both dating the same guy. he is frequently referred to as “our boyfriend” and they all go out together and are obviously both insanely jealous of the other person. <- framed as jealous of the guy giving the other one attention but we know its not really about that. he is never seen in the episode.

on the flip side, something in season 1 where theyre both vying for the affections of the same woman . theres an episode of curb your enthusiasm where larry david and rosie o’donnell are both dating the same woman and theyre trying to decide if shes straight or a lesbian. i feel like donna and harvey could do that (the possibility she is bisexual is never mentioned in the episode.)

for donnas birthday (obviously they talk about it first) and invite samantha over for the night as their third. at the beginning she and harvey get into a bit of an argument and donna clears her throat to remind them this is about her actually

oh i have thought about this a lot so like. when they get together yknow they were best friends for over a decade right. and now they’re Together so harvey is trying to switch from gay best friend mode to Boyfriend Mode. and he slips up and their first big fight is because he says something wayyy too bitchy about her shoes.

episode where donna dates a woman named harriet. i dont know what happens i just think it would cause a lot of problems

scene in season 1 after the cameron episode where theyre alone in harvey’s office and harvey’s head in in donnas lap and hes talking about cameron saying “it just brought up a lot of stuff for me yknow.” // and then a scene in season 9 after mike leaves where harvey and donna collapse on his couch and his head is in her lap again and he says mike coming back brought back a lot of memories

maybe not a deleted scene per se but i have this idea in my head of like, the first five minutes of the episode donna and harvey are in like a decontamination shower by the CDC surrounded by guys in hazmat suits and donna is furiously scrubbing her hair telling harvey “if i ever invite you to a bachelorette party again, shoot me”

just like . a scene between harvey and lily that establishes she did All That aka the cheating on his dad thing for attention. and then hes like i cant believe you! you did all that to me just for attention?? and then later in the episode back at the office harvey fakes a panic attack cus no one had talked to him in the last twenty minutes

[jaker-shit]

Then theres the question of whether or not im playing into or upholding harmful systems with the way i express myself here? Like how much of my thoughts and feelings regarding romance and sex and relationships is natural desire? Hiw much of the things i want are products of patriarchy that i need to unlearn? I do find women attractive, and i desire a sexual and romantic relationship to someone. I dont think im entitled to anything from anybody. Sometimes i do think of strangers sexually. It might be bad? Would it be different if i was attracted to men? Am i being selfish or making things about my own dipshit problems when i shouldnt? Does it matter if im on a useless personal blog? Is there a way to look at someone sexually and respectfully as a straight man? Does it matter if youre getting 0 pussy for the next millennium anyway? Is that some incel faggot shit? Does any of this make sense? Im having too many thoughts to type all out like i want to beam it directly to someones head but that would be like an infinite void of the absolute stupidest things a human being could say like honestly I should just be keeping this all in my head. Fuck is everything i do performative? Youd think i could perform something well or do something fuckin useful to anyone for once. Ah shit does a ton of this make me come off as a genuine creep? I dont talk to women generally and on the rare occasion i do theres zero flirting or anything so i try not to be a creep but maybe i just have shit vibes anyway damn i hope not. Yknow ive been a fuckin terrible son and brother. Im supposed to be a role model and support for my little brother but the only thing i can fuckin do i buy him booze until he turns 21 and can do it himself. Hes a fantastic kid hes in a university i could never handle. Hes fit and skinny and good looking. He’s actually a talented artist and writer. Ive been a stupid lazy fat piece of shit while he went and started to make something of himself and i know my parents hate it. I know i let them down every day they dont even need to say it. Useless fuckin 21 years old can barely handle a part time job lied about going to school for the past year to avoid disappointment cant do fucking anything right when asked what is even ghe point to being here still fuck this is stupid and should be ignored like my problems are so fucking stupid. I had every advantage and the people i know came from so much harder places and i havent the discipline or self control to accomplish anything. Its fuckin pathetic and instead of fixing anything and being a man im cryin aboit it online like a bitch i stg i do not deserve to live on this earth

[pumpkinsy0]

Tim and Two-bit dating hcs (like let’s say their in they’re honeymoon phase)

before i start this is gonna b a lil suggestive, not straight nsfw but yknow i out em at the end in case u aint wanna see that

•their HONEYMOON honeymoon phase was like the first week or first few weeks they were together, the emotions they felt were so new to them and it wasnt exactly euphoric??? but it did feel great, imagine buying something new and u feel like everything in ur life just aligns for a bit and thats how they felt times 1.5

•they dont see the point in dates, if it was like anyone else they would feel more obligated to in order to make the person feel special, but w each other they arent particularly interested in that

•they could b making out somewhere and two bit jokingly acts like a woman in “throws of passion” and tim just has to stand there and wait for him to SHUT UP!!!!

•tims slept over at twos place like ONEEE time and never again bc he accidentally scared his sister and it was awkward to see his mom

•iiiii think from the beginning they knew they werent rlly gonna last forever, but that was something that was in the back of their heads, but they still jokingly talked about marriage and i say JOKINGLY i mean it, i dont think either of em see themselves getting married so it rlly was just jokes, mostly on two’s end he was the only making em the most

•tims acc not used to actual relationships, but two def is, and while they arent DATING dating, they still do act like a couple in some aspects, and it gets tim to kinda fumble???? and two thinks its pretty funny

•two is always grabbing at tim, lets make that clear, hes not rlly into pda???? but hes not completely keeping his hands to himself, tim just never touches two in public at all just cause thats who he is, and two jokes that hes trying to hide him away

•hate to say it, but they play pool at bucks bar and both of em r staring at the others ass, does buck notice??? he sure wishes he didnt, i feel like they do it at any time honestly

•when theyre doing the devils tango, let it b knows that two bit STILL isnt taking shit seriously, hes not, and usually tim would b annoyed but i stead here hes like “this guy😒😒😒”

•two bit will have marks on him after, u know what, and its rare, but if someone sees it, its like “were u in a fight???” “oh i was in a fight alright😏😏” and tim wants to shoot himself

[edible-star-soup]

“how can i feel so much love for everyone around me but its not romantic”

“How can I feel so much for people but every time I think it’s romantic I don’t actually like them and I’m just delusional”

“oh”

“Yours must suck so bad. I can’t even imagine loving and feeling things for people but it never being romantic. I do like people on the infatuation level sometimes but because I analyze them so in depth there’s always something that icks me out. I don’t think I’ve ever really loved someone tho. I’m a firm believer in if you loved them you wouldn’t fall out of love with them. You can move on, but you’ll always love them.”

“we are so different”

“why?”

“just our beliefs and experiences”

“oh”

“maybe you need to stop analyzing things that are only there for you, see what theyre showing, instead of what you think you see”

“No I analyze what they’re showing. Cause when you ignore your instincts that’s when you get hurt.”

“oh”

“i dont go like psycho crazy in depth like learn their every aspect to analyze them. Just like the orange peel theory”

“the what?”

“You ask them if they’ll peel an orange for you, If they say yes, even if with hesitation, it shows that they will put effort in. If they straight up say no or make excuses, it shows they don’t wanna put effort in because that’s your job. Anyways I don’t know how to explain my thinking but like I don’t analyze everything. Like ofc there’s people that are date material I just don’t like them. Cause everyone has mistakes so yknow. It’s not like every little mistake or imperfection matters but”

“ill never get you”

“ill never get me either. Maybe i should just mess around and have fun kissing everybody like you do”

“idk man i guess i just feel like maybe im falling behind, i feel so much for so many people and i want to love them like a lover would and make them feel happy like a lover would, and i feel bad knowing that everyone will always have someone that will make them happier than i do. no matter what i do about it, i cant love them like they want. and its worse because someone will put into words all they want in someone to love and ill be everything they list but i just, cant love them”

“oh”

“no because i feel romance i fall in love with everything around me all the time and i know what its like to want and to love and be loved but its just not a romance like how others perceive it. i have so much feeling for absolutely everything, but its just not what somebody wants to be with, because i cant love them like they want, but i do.”

“I don’t know how to explain how I feel, I like people and there are people that I would date if given a chance but I don’t like them. I don’t desire to be with anyone but I crave romance. I don’t like people very often but on occasion I do, But I don’t wanna do anything about it because I’d rather sit with my feelings than lose that one ray of hope”

“oh my god were different”

“yeah were different”

“i think everytime we talk personally we get more and more different, or just find more differences”

“Like there’s nobody I want romantically but I WANT a love life. And when I do want someone I can’t do anything about it cause the only time I feel human is when I like someone and I don’t like not feeling human. i just float around. like a damn jellyfish. But when I like someone I feel like I exist. So I can’t do anything about it because if and when they say they don’t like me back they’ll disappear and I’ll be inhuman again. i dont know how to explain it better than that. i just want to feel man. Like ofc I occasionally feel real. But most things just don’t feel real at all.”

“i promise theres more humanity in you than just your feelings for others, if that helps”

[unicornsaures]

talk. about whatever’s on your mind. aaaanything and everything just in case u needed an invitation to yap today 😻😻

taking this as a excuse to have a yap session about my nonhuman aus because there are SO. many things that are included for very specific reasons(mainly elf laurens cause its my main nonhuman au, but the divinity AU isnt exempt from secret meanings either >:3c) but i just never elaborate on any deeper meanings because technically theyre supposed to be up for interpretation but screw that things are included for very. very specific reasons

OKAY STARTING WITH ELF LAURENS !! Im starting off with his design itself because while its not necessarily a secret, his markings are extremely important to the story because obviously its a massive focus with the whole insecurity thing and attempting to scratch them off so!! In his early design it isnt included, but theres two things i added to either foreshadow things or that make more sense because certain things previously didnt have reasoning. For starters, his voice! I make it *very* clear that Laurens absolutely hates his voice - yknow, with that high pitched nonhuman growl? Theres a reason for that! In my AU, elves arent supposed to have markings on their throat; it fucks with their vocal chords. Yknow who does have a marking on their throat? Thats right, John does! So not only does he have 'two' voices, he also has a big reminder of that just straight in the middle of his throat - so rven if he didnt talk people would know why. Then theres the dots on his head. Thats foreshadowing. Cant tell you what its foreshadowing, but take that information how you will.

Also would like to elaborate on his relationship with Kinloch in the fic because no, Kinloch is not evil or bad or abusive. I try and make it clear that their relationship isnt necessarily healthy, but thats also not Kinloch's fault either way. Its Johns own inability to stabilize his emotions surrounding someone he cares about(ex. begging him to run away with him - when rejected, he runs away himself.) This is a massive mischaracterization of Laurens on my part but like I said in the fic itself, its just me projecting for 4k words. Oh, and he gets that scar on his lip when he's 20 in what i call a 'drinking accident.' Dont ask me to elaborate on that either, John is just a reckless drunk.

Obviously theres the whole art thing, but i think its pretty self explanatory on why hes drawing. I think i stated explicitly it was a coping device but if not i think thats obvious but i never elaborated on his medium of choice; graphite :3!! Its messy. Thats it. He uses the powdered graphite, which i think he would find it was a representation of process rather than product. The point of using graphite is the limited choice of color that only leaves an artist with shades. It also just goes with the theme of his art because idk, hes out here drawing the idea and/or image of death itself in a way its gorey but also gorgeous, so take that as you will.

Also I have had many yap sessions on why exactly John draws the gorey and grotesque but ill save you on insane details and simplify it down to; after his mothers death, he was naturally drawn to the beauty found within something so vile and horrifying.

Okay ive talked all too long aboute the elf laurens thing, so now the divinity AU! There isnt much meaning inside of this other than the very very clear toxic relationship between Alex and John; but its toxic for a reason. As dysfunctional as they may be, they are better of together than apart. Like mentioned in the fic itself, Alex was cruel to his devotees and followers before John came along. I wont go into specifics or anything, he was just cruel. John, on the other hand, was also cruel. Thats why hes a fallen angel, obviously. He fell due to others actions but the reason he followed this other person in the first place is because they were holding something he did over his head, threatening to tell higher deity's and whatnot. But instead, John is a fucking idiot and ended up doing what this person wanted which ultimately ended up in him falling and losing everything. Obviously, this leaves someone scarred because ill just say it, in this AU at least, falling from wherever they may be is not a painless experience.

In turn, he hasn't physically fallen anywhere, but there are physical signs and overall, you can tell by how they act. So, upon finding Alexander - a god, basically - the only other purpose he has in life is to peldge devotion to someone. Hes basically shunned from other angels, and so finding a deity to pledge devotion to is the only thing he can do. Their relationship is not at all healthy. Ive described it as a worshiped/worshiper dynamic because thats what it is. No matter if Alex views John as an equal, Laurens will always view alex as a higher being than he is and in short its a massive power imbalance with how willing John is to bend over backwards for him(ex. ripping off his wings ! Never happens, alex wont physically let him, but like i said, John is willing.) The only reason I say that they should stay together is that other deity's wouldnt stop him from doing this kind of thing. 'Offering your wings to prove your devotion? Yeah, hand em over.' is basically what would happen and it would be 10x more of a corrupted relationship than john and alex have. Alex keeps him in line basically, and John worships him like..well, like the god he is i guess.

Again, this AU is me majorly projecting so take it as you will. But Alex is also completely unaware to why John is a fallen angel anyway. Even being a god, he cant just see peoples sins. He only knows when someone has sinned.

"A shame Alexander may not know his transgressions, he’s sure he couldn't have done much wrong with how much of a pleasure he’s been."

Pulling out the quotes for this story because i personally think its just easier to explain things if its been read.

AND THE BIGGEST THING!!

John nods absentmindedly, leaning into the heat of his palms that make his face contort in a painful type of love.

Its mentioned a few times, but being touched by Alex at all brings physical pain. Mostly because he's not supposed to be touched by a higher being while being a fallen angel, but it also has something to do with the fact he 'swore on his ability to love to prove his devotion.' In short, John didnt think he had the ability to love, much less deserve it. So, being touched by one he fell for brings him physical pain because he shouldnt be supposed to! The love he spoke of when he exempted Alex from this was love a devotee has for their god, not love like as romantic love. Obviously, in a way, he broke his own promise. This is also why the pain goes away after alexander admits he loves him because at that point, 'his god' basically just excused the fact he broke his pledge by announcing any feelings he may have are returned. So yeah! Thats fun.

Anyway, that was my yap session. I talked for way too long uhm..oops! Im not normal about nonhumans :(