#i dont really think you should be making jokes in your image id. that don’t describe the image. like. dude

[aroace-poly-show]

ngl i dont think image ids are something you should be making into a silly little joke

[monsterenergysimp]

Permanence

corpse husband x fem!reader 

summary: you meet corpse on a stream and you’re surprised when he reaches out to you 

warnings: cursing, mentions of tattooing

word count: 1.9k

notes: This is proof read but could have missed some stuff. This is my first corpse fic and my first time writing fanfic since I posted that super cringey book on wattpad when I was like 12 or something. I’d appreciate feed back so please reach out to me :)

main blog @itsmysleepover

read part 2 here!

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You were cleaning up your station so you can get home and stream. You loved your day job as a tattoo artist but you also really enjoyed streaming. It started as a way to promote yourself as an artist and the shop you worked at but it eventually became a really fun way to destress at the end of the week (or day if you were really itching to stream). “Hey Y/N was that your last client?” your boss, KC, asked as she walked to the front of the shop and put new flash drawings on the walls.

“Yes ma’am!” You said back excitedly. You finished cleaning your station and tossed your black gloves in the trash. “And you can’t trick me into staying and taking walk-ins,” you joked with her. She rolled her eyes and walked back into her office “It was one time,” she said as you slid on your jacket. As you walked out your phone buzzed in your pocket and you checked to see who had texted you. It was a message from Sean asking if you were free to play Among Us with him and some other streamers. You replied that you were on your way home right now and totally down. You were excited to see who was playing this time around since their Among Us streams are super entertaining and have gotten really popular.

On your way back you tweeted and posted to your Instagram story that you’d be streaming soon and set up all your stuff once you made it home. After a few minutes, you had a couple of thousand people watching. You entered the discord chat and Sean spoke up. “Everyone this is Y/N she’s sensitive so be gentle.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you guys and I’m not gentle, I'm ruthless,” You say into your mic and notice the chat calling you a liar. Everyone was in the lobby waiting for the game to start. “You sound way too sweet to be ruthless,” Corpse said. The countdown started and you were imposter with Charlie.

“This should be fun,” you told the stream. Yout tried playing strategically but after such a long shift your brain was mush. You saw Poki in nav and killed her then vented into shields. Not long after the body was reported and you were sure you were going to get voted out or at least sussed.

“Where was the body?” Felix asked. “Nav and I didn’t see anyone near there so whoever is imposter must have vented,” Corpse responded. Felix spoke up again. “I think I saw Y/N walk that way and I haven’t seen her since.”

Shit, shit, shit shit. “I’m in shield right now so-” you said trying to defend yourself but Charlie spoke up. “I was doing tasks with her earlier and I saw her walk into shields so she’s safe but I’m still not sure about Rae.” Everyone discussed a bit more and some people, including Corpse, voted for you but Rae got the majority vote and was ejected. You released your breath and kept playing being extra careful.  

“Okay, guys that was super close. Corpse knows and is out to get me,” you said to the chat. You were eventually voted off but one round later victory was written across your screen with your ghost and Charlie’s avatar. “Good game guys,” Corpse said.

“I told you guys I was ruthless!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat at your station doing nothing because a client had canceled a four-hour session. You were listening to music and sketching some stuff but you were bored out of your mind and you didn’t want to leave in case you got a walk-in. The music got quiet as you received a twitter notification saying someone had messaged you. You reached for your phone and saw you had gotten a dm from Corpse.

C: hey :)

You didn’t know what to respond. You were mostly confused as to why he decided to message you out of the blue. Did he want something? But what would he want?

Y: Hii! This is sudden

C: was i bothering you?

    shit sorry!

Y: Youre fine I wasn’t doing anything rn

C: how has your day been

    i dont usually do stuff like this

Y: Im glad you did im doing better now I was so bored

C: what were you doing that was so terrible

Y: NOTHING! thats the problem :(

C: im sure youll find something to do

You stared at his message. Unsure what to respond.

Y: Im gonna give myself a tattoo

C: what?

    NO!

You tossed the needles you used for your tattoo into the sharps box. “Oh my god you didn’t,” KC said. She noticed the wrap on your calve from the tattoo you just gave yourself out of boredom. “It’s not my fault I didn’t have anything else to do!” You said trying to defend yourself. She sighed and just shook her head. “Just go home business is slow today.” It was raining so the shop probably wasn’t going to get a walk-in anyway and you didn’t have any more clients for the day. It was only 2 pm but you drove home and after making lunch for yourself decided to stream. You weren’t expecting too many people so it was bound to be super chill. Your leg felt sore reminding you of the tattoo. You snapped a quick pic of the fresh jack-o-lantern on the side of your calve and messaged it to Corpse.

Y: [image] it came out nice!

C: thats  super cool actually

    i was concerned why you would just give yourself a tattoo but i found your instagram and       youre super talented

Y: Thank you!

For some reason, it felt strange to just have that be the end of your response.

Y: Im about to start streaming if you wanted to watch

    [link]

C: ill be watching ;)

What’s that supposed to mean?

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat in your apartment watching tv, hand lost in a bag of Doritos, and scrolling through twitter. You had stopped paying attention to the anime playing on the screen since you’ve watched it a hundred times and knew you wouldn’t miss anything. It was Saturday and you usually take those days off. Take the time to do chores or meet up with some friends but today you felt like not doing any of those things. As you continue your endless scroll (not helping the twitter addiction you told yourself you’d try to get a handle on) you got a message from Corpse.

C: wanna talk?

You looked down at the message unsure of how to answer. It was a simple yes or no and the obvious answer was yes. You and Corpse had started talking more regularly. You still didn’t have each other’s phone numbers but it was fine. Your conversations weren’t too big-- just you sending him memes, tiktoks, and telling him how much you liked the songs he would drop. Or him complimenting a tattoo you did. Sometimes he’d message you during streams telling you funny stuff his fans would say in the chat and you’d do the same. You learned a bit about each other but nothing too deep or serious. Like how you two lived a few cities away and you both really liked Donnie Darko. When Sean first invited you to that game out of everyone else there you were most excited to meet Corpse. He’s just so sweet and funny. Of course, you’d love to talk to him but you were also itching to talk to him and the last thing you’d ever want to do was make him uncomfortable.

Y: Yeah id love to talk

Here goes nothing.

Y: Wanna facetime or something?

     No pressure or anything it could even be a regular call

     I think facetime is just my default lol

You sent those last two messages quickly after you had sent the first. You wished you could know what he was thinking. It was killing you to think you had turned him off from talking to you completely. You put your phone down on the couch and went to wash your hand of Dorito dust. When you got back from the kitchen you turned off the tv and tossed yourself onto the couch.

Still no message.

Why am I so fucking stupid?  

Just as you were standing up to stretch from sitting on the couch all day your phone buzzed. You reached for it fast and looked to see that it was him. You became super excited still not even knowing what the message said. It could have told you to never talk to him again for all you knew.

C: sure lets facetime

    xxx-xxx-xxxx

You had his phone number. You added him to your small but growing contact list and called. You sat on your couch waiting for a response when he finally picked up the screen was black. It didn’t upset you; you kind of expected it and didn’t care what he had to do to make himself more comfortable during this call.

“Hey,” he said. His voice was raspier than usual.

“Did you just wake up?” You asked and looked at the time. It was about a little past noon and you had only eaten Doritos all day. Shit, you should probably make a decent meal.

“Not that long ago but yeah,” he responded and giggled. That giggle.

“Well, I’ve eaten nothing but Doritos all day while rewatching Ouran High School Host Club, so you’re welcome to join me as I make myself something to eat.”

“Sounds like fun; what are we eating?”

“I don’t know yet,” You said as you stood up and made your way to the kitchen. You opened the pantry and looked. You noticed a can of diced tomatoes and reached for it then checked the expiration date. It was still good. On your counter were some onions and garlic. “How about some tomato soup?”

“Sounds delicious.” you smiled at Corpse and your phone screen not knowing if he was also looking at his screen or not. “You’re really pretty-- you know that?”

“Thanks, but you don’t have to--”

“I’ve already told you what an incredible artist you are so many times I bet you’re tired of hearing it, but you already know what a talented artist you are.”

“That is very kind of you Corpse,” you said to him bashfully as you chopped the onion and opened the can of tomatoes. “But once again you don’t have to reach so far to compliment me.”

“I’m not reaching you are talented and beautiful and--”

“I thought I was pretty.” You could hear him chuckle with a smile on his face. “You’re both,” he said. You could feel your face getting warm from blushing.

“Fuck you you’re making me blush. My face is all hot and stuff.”

He laughed at how flustered you got. “That’s the cutest thing ever.”

You didn’t know how to respond so you just put some olive oil in a pot and tossed in your onions. It became silent but it was a comfortable silence. You turned the stove on and watched the flame for a few seconds. “If it was dark we could pretend we were together and having a bonfire or something,” you said to the phone as you turned the camera to show him the flame (still not 100 percent sure if he was looking at you or not).

“I’ll put it on the list of things to do when you visit me someday.”

[thoughtsarestupid]

From the sidelines; asexual daddy’s dating advice (part 2; electric boogaloo)

(yes, part 2. Told you that you couldn’t stop me from making this a series)

(Pt. 1 https://thoughtsarestupid.tumblr.com/post/653149068430835712/from-the-sidelines-asexual-daddys-dating-advice )

On this episode; HEELS. WHAT. (And other clothes)

Heels are, as we all know, a type of shoe. One that involves learning how to walk in a completely different way and, as my sister tells me, feels like you just repeatedly attempt to not break your ankles every time you take a step. And although it may seem like a good idea to wear them for some kind of… classiness, or sexiness, or allure or however you call it, it’s really not.

You see, if you’re comfortable on heels, you’re fine. Wear them all you like. But if you’re like most heel-wearing women and would rather attempt to fit sneakers into your handbag (OH ILL GET TO THAT LATER FASHION INDUSTRY) than to walk on heels even a second more than necessary; hear me out.

What if you just… don’t?

You see, if you’re looking for a serious relationship, and not a quick fuck, you’re not trying to give someone a false image (or at least I hope you’re not. Might have to dedicate an episode to that.) but an actual idea of who you are. And wearing heels? That’s not who you are. I suggest comfortable, clean shoes. Because you don’t want to come off as raggedy, but you don’t want to be nervous. And comfortable shoes are perfect for making you feel less tense, which in turn will make the vibes less tense and the one on the other side of the date less tense. A win-win.

NEXT UP; TIES.

Yes men, were talking about those. Colors, bow or neck, slim or thick, pattern or one color. Lots of choices and, if you’re wearing a tux or three-piece to your date, one of the few ways you can change it up. Now, I don’t advise you to wear such a business outfit to a date if you fancy yourself a mate, but let’s get into it anyways;

The main thing you should be considering is the color. You see, an entire branch of psychology has theorized and proven how colors associate in your brain, which is where this chart comes in;

Basically, you want to choose your tie color after what you want to represent. Look into it a bit, find what you think is best and wear that.

Also, I am begging you.

DONT WEAR A COLORED BOW TIE.

The only color a bow tie should have is black, and that’s final. Otherwise you will look like a clown. Wear a necktie, single Windsor knot. If you’re going for the vibes I think you’re going for, that’s your best bet.

THIRDLY; POCKETS.

There’s this joke that women fit a hundred million things into their bags, and that’s kinda right. While on the other hand, men fit a hundred million things into their pockets. You see; the fashion industry really, really likes to sell women more shit. So they withhold them pockets. So they can sell them bags. Seems a bit rude to me but I’m not here to give you a lecture on economy, but on the dating scene.

Anyways, to put it simply; take only the bare necessities. If you’re intending to pay; a wallet. Always bring your ID. Phone, on silent or preferably off. If you want it, perfume. I’ve learned that it smells a little different when applied just before you meet up and that does wonders sometimes. First impressions and all. Maybe a beauty product you can apply in under 60 seconds, but try to make sure your pockets and or bag don’t or doesn’t seem full. If you take a lot of things you seem overprepared, or the other feels underprepared, and that creates stress. And that is both bad.

Finally; clothing choice.

Coco Chanel get off the F*CKING STAGE WE DONT NEED YOU.

Little black dress? Cool. Tuxedo? Nice.

But you’re overdoing it. If you’re looking for a connection, a spark? I recommend you don’t spend more than 30 minutes picking an outfit. Preferably, put on two timers. One for 25 minutes and one for 30. If you’re done before the 25 minute mark, you’re underthinking it. After the 30 mark; you’re overthinking it.

And no, I don’t know your wardrobe. But guess what? I do know your thought process. It doesn’t have to be half an hour. But setting a specific time border to when you need to make the decision means your brain can find some amount of solidity in your stress. Sometimes the first outfit you chose was right. Sometimes you actually need the hour you spend on choosing. But again; you need to be calm. Stress is fine, but stress means you’re going to act differently while your main goal on a date is to determine if the person opposite of you is a good match. And if you’re stressed, your brain goes funky and decides much less rationally.

So calm down and find something you’re comfortable in without looking underdressed. I don’t know what’s in your wardrobe, but you’re not in a job interview with Steve Jobs. Just remember you’re also not partying with the boys/girls. Find a balance. Just don’t stress. People don’t primarily judge on fashion choice anyways, unless you’re dating an Instagram model who only cares about clothes in which case

Then; to counter some arguments again;

Yes, of course there are people that are only dating to get a quick shag. One night stands are popular, and so is dating for sex. If you want that, you dress for that. I suggest something slutty and revealing so your intentions are clear.

Yes there is such a thing as slutty clothes for men.

Indeed, it is true that wearing too informal clothes is a dealbreaker for some. That’s why I don’t recommend you choose ONLY on comfortable levels. Don’t show up in PJs. You have to find a balance that makes you comfortable and let’s the other know you’re serious.

Just because I’m asexual doesn’t mean I don’t understand the dating market. Trust me, people are underthinking or overthinking their clothes.

25-30 minutes is indeed a randomly chosen window of time, but it’s only an advice. 15-20 minutes might work just as well, or 45-50. But that’s personal preference, and I don’t advice you to go past 60 minutes. It’s about having a handle for your mind to hold on to, not about a very specific rule.

And remember; this is all coming from someone who has never dated anyone and is not interested in dating anyone. I’m literally saying this as advice from the sideline, like a soccer dad trying to advice you all how to play the game because what you’re doing is stupid.

Sincerely,

A.

[dndfuckhouse]

session 33 - Introductions and Invitations

> 🎵   Sword Search on Koholint Island / LOZ: Link’s Awakening (2019) OST.

After having spent the whole of the morning walking around the group find themselves drawn to the smell of fish wafting around the city square and head over towards the nearby café to refuel themselves over lunch.

After being greeted by the upbeat waitress they seat themselves and begin pondering the menu. The feeling of the bright midday sun beating down on their heads while the cool seaside breeze blows through keeps them company amongst the townspeople in the city square.

Cimmorro: the image rn is finn cimm han plum rokka in the same table..... psalm also but at the edge??? Chip: dnd cafe marching order being determined rn Celebrity Guest Aki: WHY DOES THIS SOUND SO UNBALANCEDD Rokka: BC IT IS Psalm: achieving total mental blankness trying to imagine this Keva: 

Finn: im ordering nothing because i literally cant eat or drink Psalm: just ask for the bloodwine alone Finn: yeah ill just inconspicuously ask for fish blood in isolation Plum: they got that just for you actually the blood drink, god put that on there for you finn Psalm: yeah we called ahead

Noticing Keva struggling with the menu, Cimmorro moves to lend her a land subtly. Meanwhile Plum tells Finn they can order the dish that comes with fish blood and split it with him if he’d like.

Keva: she's not really looking at the menu much.... you probably just see her watching everyone else and checking the number on the menu for the thing they order Cimmorro: okay well he's going to look at you for a good second, contemplating if he should offer to help but realizes that might be a bad idea so he's just going to go get the waitress' attention and go like "what would be your best sellers here? and what you would recommend?" Cherry: she hums and thinks "i'd say the sea bed or the prawn's eyes usually sell pretty well! the salty dog ale is a local specialty as well, id recommend it if you aren't made queasy easy" she says with a laugh Keva: trying to picture wtf sea bed and salty dog could mean Cimmorro: (dwfl he wanted to order the sea bed) cimm nods at her and looks at the menu "10 sp for the sea bed... fish and bread sounds appealing today huh i'll have one," he says alla this w/ intention for keva to hear. and adds, "i think i'll just have a glass of water though, thanks" Keva: she looks at cimm for a moment, silently feeling grateful, and says "same as him" tilting her menu a bit towards cimm and hands the menu back

Plum: plum turns to finn and says "i could order this," and points to the caver's treat, "and you could have the cup of blood that comes with it, if you're hungry." Finn: hes already spacing out when plum suddenly speaks to him, whipping his head around a little startled. "oh" admittedly, finn wasn't hungry, or thirsty, but plums attentiveness does touch him a little. he nods. "that is very kind of you plum... if you truly do not mind, then ... id appreciate that." Plum: "sure, no problem" plum says to finn and takes a sip from their drink. they wave the waitress over to order one ＣＡＶＥＲ＇Ｓ ＴＲＥＡＴ 

The Group’s Orders ~ 🐟

Plum: Reaver’s Luck, Caver’s Treat Rokka: Berried Salmon, Reaver’s Luck Psalm: Berried Salmon Han: The Phoenix, Fishers Teeth (takeout - Caver’s Treat ) Keva: Sea Bed Cimmorro: Sea Bed

Taking the orders, the waitress gives a nod and scuttles off. After a small wait the dishes are brought out, the scent of fish overpowering the place. The group find their meals appetising and begin to dig in and chatter amongst themselves. Finn stealthily transfers the bloodwine into a cup of his own he can discretely drink from while Keva wraps and saves a slice of the bread for later consumption.

Finn: he clinks his glass with plum to thank them for the fish but before he takes a sip he blinks "oh... what are we to do with the fish plum?" Plum: they clink their mug with finn's and then gives him a confused look. after a moment they look like they're trying not to laugh a little. "what made you think i wasn't gonna...eat it?" plum asks before picking up a fork. Finn: "i simply thought it might be a bit much.. is all.." feeling a little stupid for having asked now. "and it is meant to be eaten with the blood after all.. " Plum: "oh, nah. it was two gold pieces so i'd better finish it, honestly," plum says and starts eating. "also i don't really want the blood," they stop and make a hand gesture as if to say that finn can just go ahead and enjoy the blood himself. Finn: he fails to control himself and finish listening to plum, chugging the glass in one go, feeling particularly satisfied and sated for now.  "ah, please... i will pay for it of course, you ordered this for my sake" he says quickly as if he didnt just drink that like a possessed man Han: finns eyes do the cat silly time thing Cimmorro: yess finn goo you fucking horse Han: vibrates in his chair cause he got the blood zoomies

Plum: "or we can just split it" plum says casually, not saying anything at the change in finn's demeanour for a moment there. it'd probably be rude to seem a bit surprised.

Rokka: “LOOKING GOOD” Cimmorro: "kinda pog as they say...." cimm gives his thanks to wee jasus christ and begins to eat in a decent pace... just focused on eating Rokka: halfway through chewing rokka talks with his mouth full, "watsh pogh" Cimmorro: cimm looks disgusted at you, once again, for talking with your mouth full. and just goes. "oh you know like- [does the pog face for a split second]" before going back to his food though he looks up at you again the next second and goes like "oh right. rokka, here." he slides 35gp across the table to you. "for the time at nickels." and he just goes back to eating Rokka: "ohhh so then if i wanted to say my food is "pog" i can just [makes the pog face]?" he looks down at the money "oh! you didn't have to pay me back....thanks though!" le pockets money Han: han goes (mgs ❗ noise) and starts fishing in her side pocket too "wait i owe you for bedroll and rope" and hands rokka X gold Rokka: he then turns to han "WHAT!!! NO, NO ITS OKAY!!" he tries to push it back to han Han: she doesn't even touch it again and goes back to food "i dont like being in debt" Rokka: he stares at the xgp before reluctantly taking it seeing as han refusing to take it back "alrigghtt. thanks hannn" Han:  😇 Psalm: he watches Rokka’s exchanges for a moment. "It just occurred to me that now would be a good time for that drink you owe me." Cimmorro: cimm looks at rokka and psalm and goes "i'm starting to learn that it's a bad idea to be in debt to you psalm" Psalm: "I think I'm pretty fair all things considered 😇 " Cimmorro: he just sighs and goes back to his food

Rokka: his head whips over to psalm like !!!!! "i-WHAT--oh! yeah....do you.......want to share my drink?" Psalm: "No I don't...?" Rokka: well, then.......what do you want?" Psalm: "One salty dog ale please (: ." Han: did chip plan for this joke. its too perfect? Psalm: WAIT YOU'RE SO RIGHT  Han: I LEGIT THOUGHT IT WAS A GAG U WERE DOING AND LOOKED AT THE MENU Chip: LIFE FINDS A WAY....

Ghester: you hear a chuckle in your head followed by a voice that says "well he's a good sportsman about it" Psalm: "It was his idea to play." Rokka: he looks around "HUH WHAT?!"  Ghester: "that makes a person more reluctant sometimes" he then laughs at rokka's reaction Psalm: he scoffs. Rokka: he abruptly stands up from the table and shaking the table in the process "OK WHATS GOING ON"

Getting agitated by Ghester’s repeated remarks, Rokka bolts up from his seat ending all other conversation in his wake, the rest of the party stares at him, grabbing their plates instinctually in case he flipped the table over. The waitress in the meanwhile hands Pslam his newly purchased drink on Rokka’s dime.

Ghester: "oh he's gotten excited" says the voice Rokka: “WHO!?” Psalm: psalm is just drinking casually

Cimmorro: when rokka finally settles down, cimm just looks at him like 🤨 before looking at psalm again, "speaking of being fair, why don't you tell us about your little friend... ghester? you said you'd tell us about them, no?" Psalm: * doesn't remember what he said * "Yeah alright. I introduced Plum and you already right?" Cimmorro: he nods "introduced us... but we don't even know who or what you introduced us to" Rokka: just looking up at the sky like "....hello?" Plum: they had jumped at rokka's reaction but at the mention of their name by psalm they think they can guess what's happening now. Finn: he was gonna reply to plum but because of all the commotion his attention is focused on psalm rn, but he is bouncing his leg under the table Keva: she just has no idea what's going on

Psalm: "Your guess is honestly as good as mine." @ ghester "You want to explain? I myself am not really sure what to say." Ghester: he chuckles before speaking into the rest of your heads "hmm... well you may call me ghester. i am a companion of sorts to your lovely friend psalm here. pleasure to meet you" Rokka: "ghost...........?" side eyes psalm Psalm: "No I don't think that's quite it." Rokka: “then what?” Psalm: he just shrugs Rokka: rokka slowly nods as if he gets it but he doesnt

Keva: she jumps a bit "what the fuck" Plum: plum shivers at the sudden voice in their head. "i really thought the cult would be the weirdest thing with y'all and yet." Han: she squints her eyes "can you like, read our minds? do you have a body? are you stealing psalms...?" han leans in quizzically and stares at psalm Ghester: he laughs "no i cannot read anyone's mind, not even his. nor do i hold any control over him, i dont think he'd quite appreciate me doing it even if i could" he thinks "i dont have a body, though i feel like maybe i did once, a funny thought to have these days" Han: she pouts thoughtfully but her brain is actually empty "hmmm" Cimmorro: damn so no cock penis? Han: hate your ass Finn: im just imagining the voice of the book from nier rn for this guy Chip: YOU SHOULD THATS HIM Plum: oh my god that was the decided voice, thats so horrible Han: liam obrien haunts us everywhere

Finn: he does squint at psalm, but he thinks that ghester’s voice is quite pleasant so its not like its a huge hassle. after psalm told them about this, at least. he is a bit irritated over having thought he was hallucinating it a while ago. Plum: "doesn't sound like he's been with you for too long"  Psalm: "It's been a couple weeks. Maybe a month." Plum: "wow, that's shorter than i expected. i've already known you fuckers for a week by now." Cimmorro: he just kinda looks confused towards psalm and responds to ghester "uhh huh... are you the reason why he coughs smoke or..." Psalm: he’s just blinking at Cimm like oh you saw that lol whoops Ghester: "not directly, but its related. i guess you could say im a conduit for his magic. in charge of watching over him" Cimmorro: just shaking his head at psalm and how he said they've only been together for a short time... like what is wrong with yall

Finn: "and you just.... hid this from us?" Ghester: he chuckles at you finn "thats a funny response" Finn: "im sure it is after youve messed with all our heads" bouncing his leg quicker Psalm: "What reason would I have to tell you? It's not like I've known any of your for all that long." Plum: looking at finn like you good bro Finn: "if you didnt want to tell us you should do better to keep your parasite out of our minds then" Ghester: "ooh quite harsh" Psalm: “Right? Yeesh. Why am I being put on trial here? He called you a parasite (lol)."  Cimmorro: "i get the feeling that you don't wanna share more about this. but i just wanna know if you communicating with the rest of us like this won't harm us in any way..."  no video game rpg sanity drain so to speak Keva: squinting like wtf does magic do to you...... is orin okay...... Ghester: "oh nothing to worry about there, my job is to keep him safe. If you are his friends then this extends to you as well, quite the opposite of harm" he turns his attention back to you psalm and laughs at his joke Cimmorro: cimm just hums at this, not entirely convinced but it's good for now Finn: just staring at you for a moment longer before looking away, expecting psalm to understand without actually saying anything because he's awful. Psalm: Psalm just 🤨 ...? and just decides to go back to his drink. Finn: finn: dear uncle, ive witnessed another cringe moment. this is number 10 in the top15 list

Psalm: "I think friends is generous :j , but rest assured that for now your life isn't being slowly siphoned away from you or whatever it is youre worried about. At least I don't think it is /s" Ghester: "i wonder why you would even put the thought out...? Psalm: "Because it's funny?" Ghester: [sigh] Plum: "thanks, i feel a lot better about that now." Rokka: just staring at u dead on sarcasm flying over "wait......HAVE U BEEN FEEDING OFF ME"  Ghester: he laughs jovially at you "theres nothing on you to eat dear boy" Han: han thinks 'damn... does he mean rokka has no brains to eat....'

Han: she thinks for a bit "do you have big range? before you cannot hear us?" Ghester: "hmm from wherever our good man here is standing i can hear about 120 or so feet...granted you yell when you are far away that is" Han: "does that mean you hear through psalm? and here i thought you would be useful for undercover work" han sighs a bit Psalm: "I have to agree with you on that one. Kind of disappointing." Ghester: "not necessarily, if he cant hear i still can. i can talk to you all if you are all that far away as well even if he himself isnt close" @ psalm "and here i thought you were my one ally at this table" Psalm: :j Han: "oh hmmm... that suppose that is useful..." han thinks abt strategies.. Keva: she sarcastically mumbles "just what i always wanted, a ghost from i don't know where doing god knows what, listening in on whatever i'm doing" Ghester: he laughs Rokka: he mumbles to himself after hearing this "scary..." Cimmorro: well then he stifles a small laugh and looks at keva "what could possibly go wrong, yeah?" Keva: "can't think of a single thing" Psalm: "It's thanks to him (and plum) we didn't lose your money to Rickert though. So I'd say for now the pros are more than the cons." Ghester: "oh such rare praise"  Cimmorro: "oho is he not always this nice to you?" Ghester: "tis' a heavy burden i carry" Psalm: "Stop framing it like I'm picking sides" Ghester: [laugh] Plum: "true, and he's more personable than his host," plum says jokingly Psalm: "Alright, alright already." psalm waves everyone off Han: han is like 👁  but also snorting at this

Cimmorro: "aww you poor thing... psalm be more nice... i think ghester does care about you, you know... he immediately went to me when you were unconscious." Psalm: he just rolls his eyes  Ghester: "well... as far as charges go i could have been given far worse" you feel a warm presence before he snickers "try not to bully him too much" Han: "far worse?" Ghester: "hmm well imagine if i were companion to someone completely silent...now that would be a trial" Han: she ponders the previous thought "you are right (@ ghester) at least psalm is funny sometimes." Psalm: 🤨 "Okay, pester Psalm hour is over now. Hope you all had your fun." SWATS THE AIR IN FUTLITY Ghester: [laugh] Plum: they wants to say we're not even talking to you we're talking to ghester but they'll leave him alone Keva: she snorts at the try not to bully him and pops a piece of bread into her mouth Cimmorro: he smiles at the warmth but also "no bullying, not even in your honor? you are so humble, king..." and just laughs at psalm swatting everyone off Psalm: "I try." Ghester: he laughs "you'll be fun to be around im sure" Keva: "oh he likes you" like someone talking abt a pet taking a liking to someone  Cimmorro: "he knows how to pick them... " he laughs and responds to ghester "if you ever change your mind on bullying psalm, you know who to call"

Plum: "you changed your mind pretty fast, huh?" @cimmorro​, plum is amused they're not making fun of him Cimmorro: "oh i'll still get him whenever i can. just leaving the offer with ghester in case he wants to join in." Plum: "oh, i meant on warming up to psalm's mind demon in the first place, but true" plum says Cimmorro: "oh well he's a charmer. what's not to like" he laughs Plum: "agreed" Ghester: "flattery will get you everywhere" Plum: "hah, i guess that's true ain't it." flattery's not really their thing, but they give an amused laugh.

Finished with their food and their curiosity over Ghester for the moment sated, some of the party get up to go pay for their meals while others continue to sit and chat. As they do Han continues messing about and pulling Ghester’s attention over.

Han: she covers her mouth with her hands and whispers to herself "ghesterrrrr can you hear me? tell psalm he looks like a strawberry." then get distracted and moves her hands "actually, can you move things? or are you simply ghostly" Ghester: "i cannot. lest i am a weapon psalm has willed me into and is...well using me to move things" a beat passes "all these ghost comparisons are amusing" Han: "ooooh... maybe living weapon... cool :D" Psalm: "He's what I've been fighting with this entire time." Keva: she’s gonna get up and head to the counter where she spies people paying for their food, and as she passes psalm she kinda gives a little shrug like "i tried" to change the subject lol Psalm: psalm nods, benedict cumberbatch salute

Han: she has lightbulb moment "your weapon that seems to change every time i look? and that you never actually carry on you?" Psalm: "Yes that would be the one."

To drive the point home psalm has Ghester discreetly apperate in his hands as a short sword for Han.

Cimmorro: psalm like yosuke persona 4 pulling out his katanas at the convenience store and gets arrested for it Psalm: I ASSUME EVERYON EELSE HER JUST HAS WEAPONS HONESTLY LIKE I THOUGHT THAT Cimmorro: NO ONE WHIPS IT OUT IN A RESTO Psalm: HDG WELL I DO NOW Cimmorro: AND THEN WE HANDED PSALM CHAN OVER TO THE POLICE

Han: "ghester, can i have you?? it would be super useful to change from bow to glaive in second.." han is v excited now Finn: he’s getting up yet, being intrigued by an ever changing weapon........but he feels too awkward to actually comment on it. he thinks han's reaction is kinda cute. Ghester: he laughs jovially again "sadly you cannot have me, him and i are bound. you'll have to look elsewhere, though im flattered by the thought" Han: "aww booo" han pouts and flicks at the sword (if its in arms reach anyway) Psalm: "I'm amazed you even asked honestly." on the outside psalm is :/ but on the inside psalm is like 😏 Han: HAN LOOKS AT PSALM PUZZLED Psalm: PSALM JUST LOOKS BACK AT HER LIKE WHAT? Han: she shrugs and lets it go

Chip: the pact is marriage <3 Keva: exactly, ordained by psalm's patron Psalm: why areyou trying ot homewreck me he's happily married Cimmorro: damnn psalm already taken before this campaign even started... how can we homewreck that beautiful marriage Chip: next quest Psalm: OI

Having had their fun messing with Psalm the rest of the group get up to go pay for their meals. The party idle around deciding what to do next, as they chat Han orders and waits for an additional meal to be prepared for her to take back to the Swallow’s Perch for Ferrie and the others.

> 🎵  Village of Rynoka / Moonlighter OST

Han: oh before everyone starts leaving han is like "oh oh oh, ferrie chris insists everyone stay at the swallows perch.. its free food and bed " Rokka: "WHAT"  Han: "yea :D" Finn: finn gives you this look 🤨 Han: "you included" Rokka: rokkas tail wagging at mach speed bc free roof and food epic!!!  "THATS AWESOME!!! TIME TO GO PACK THEN" he quickly gets up and immediately heads home to do as he said Han: han waves bye :D.... Rokka: waving in the distance as he runs off Finn: "i ... see" he cringes at the fact that he will need a new residence soon, and that this is the most convenient option. however, he absolutely doesn't want to be stuck with the others. bad enough that they'll have to travel together for so long

The group split off their separate ways, Han sticking around to wait for her food, though Finn also sticks around to continue chatting with her about Ferrie’s offer.

Finn: finn rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. "ugh. not much of a choice, is it?" he pulls up his scarf more before continuing. "if you want me to stay so badly theres something youll have to do for me first." Han: HAN LOLS INTERNALLY and cocks a hip "what might that be? dont overestimate how badly i want you" Finn: finn makes a grimace, you can tell from his visible eyes. "ive no interest in women, give that up this instant" (so full of himself he believes that) he begins rubbing his temples. "anyway, itll give you an opportunity to be closer to me, i suppose." and motions for you to come closer Han: han guffaws "what?? and i have little interest in small men that cant handle me. whats that got to do with your favour?" she seems entertained and leans in Finn: finn is confused by hans push and pull, was she hoping to charm him somehow like this? when she leans in he yanks her down more to a comfortable level (by her hair) and whispers  "i will say this as clear as i can to" an insult lies in the tip of his tongue but his scolding uncle appears in his mind "you. i want you to stealthily move my coffin to that inn, once i have to leave my quarters. youre the strongest so i trust youre capable. ill reward you if need be" Chip: WHY IS THIS THE GREEN M&M COPYPASTA JUDE ? Cimmorro: P;'TLQ30TO305O-0RQOFASF CHIP ILL ILLL MAUL YOUHG Finn: finns done fighting w cimm he needs someone new to hate him Psalm: finn's moral compass is his uncle its not even an angel devil him situation, its vorde

Han: han’s entertained demeanour drops immediately as her hair gets grabbed and shes mad and even madder that she didn't catch that so she just grabs finns hand painfully as he holds her hair and whispers with contained anger without even listening to whatever finns saying "dont do that. if you want to play friendly." Finn: he winces when she grabs his hand like that. normally he would not yield just yet but a fight in direct sunlight, with their bulkiest party member, is not what he needs. he lets go of her hair quickly. "i assumed it was fine to be playful around you. my apologies." <- genuinely meaning this Han: han is silent for a second "... just not the hair" and she drops finns hand "what did you say you need" Finn: "note taken. not the hair." he rubs his hand before going on his tip toes to talk to her instead this time. "i need you to move my coffin the day i move out. but obviously i dont want the whole city to see us with that thing, if you catch my drift." taking on a neutral, dry tone. Han: han thinks briefly "consider it done. i can burrow the inns cart and hide your coffin... actually, what exactly .. is it." Finn: finn blinks a little in surprise, not having expected her to still do it after he's pissed her off. his eyes get a little bigger, 🥺 like. "you will? i.. thank you. we can work out the details closer to my departure..." Han: han is like augh 🙄  at the puppy eyes bc she is immune to them "yea, just tell when to show up" Finn: "ill let you be on your way then." going off his tippy toes and waving goodbye for now Han: han waves him bye too......... cherry wheres my takeaway Cimmorro: how yall going to explain to ferrie chris abt finn's coffin Keva: dont worry about it its his burden to bear Celebrity Guest Aqua: His jesus cross to drag

After waiting a few more minutes Han is handed her takeaway, she soon scuttles her way back to the Swallow’s Perch with the meal, heading in she notes that Cimmorro isn’t back yet either. She promptly hands the food over before getting ready to work on the clock for the rest of the day. Layne joyfully takes the lunch as its handed to him, Ferrie steals a bite from it as well while Jessep stares at it and remarks he's full. 

Soon after the two’s conversation, Finn heads back to the blacksmiths to get his rapier worked on for the day, finding no need to head over to the Swallow’s Perch for the moment. The rest of the party head to their inns to prepare and transfer their belongings over, Plum and Cimmorro however make a brief stop off at Vinny’s store first to check in on the goings on and to see if he’s returned yet.

The two glance at the building once they reach it, though it doesn’t exactly look to be open. Squinting through the window they see Cole bumbling around behind the counter in the back. Cimmorro waves at her from beyond the window though she doesn't seem to notice prompting Plum to knock on the glass instead.

Cole: you see her head swoop over like : D ? before she recognizes the two of you, and comes over to the front door, appears it was locked after all, as she wrangles it open the bell jingles "hey guys!" Cimmorro: cimm goes hiya and asks her if everything's been good around Plum: "hiya, i'm just here to buy one or two things" Cole: "yep I've just been cleaning up since vinny still isnt back" she tilts her head with a sigh before turning to you a bit more chipper plum  "oho... were closed but ill make an exception for my new pal" she gives you a wink and ushers you in Plum: they jump a little at that and are a bit embarrassed now. a bit red, they scratch the back of their head and say, "i mean, you don't have to. i was just lookin' for shit to buy for my mom and pop before they got here... nothing serious." Cole: "aw dont worry about it, and if its something that easy then its all good for me to let ya nose around" she smiles as she waves her hand Cimmorro: "still no show huh, don't have any news when he'll be back too?" Cole: she frowns as she walks over to the counter "no... but if he isn't back tomorrow ill go over and see if they'll let me poke my head in..." she shakes her fist "he's...got important obligations here... yknow!" next to her one of the cats on the counter meows Cimmorro: he leans over and tilts his head looking at the cat "indeed, very important obligations." he pats the cat's head. "oh but don't get into trouble trying to get him though haha... in any case i oughta be going but i'll be peeking in from time to time. let him know i'm looking for him if you get the chance though, yea? thanks cole" he gives her a smile before gesturing to plum that he'll be heading back first Cole: she folds her arms "aauugh guards and wizards.... but sure thing, i'll...twist their arms somehow!" she gives you a cheery wave as you trot off Cimmorro: he kinda just smiles while shaking his head at that as he walks on off Plum: plum waves goodbye to cimmorro. they're kinda curious because they thought cimmorro was gonna buy something but whatever.

Going off ahead Cimmorro trots off back to the Swallow’s Perch noting Vinny still hasn't been able to return to his own store just yet. Walking back he gets a quick idea and shoots off a sending spell towards him to ease his mind over Cole and Ezra’s current statuses.

Cimmorro: "yoohoo, this is cimmorro. we found cole and ezra all safe and well. they've been back at your store since yesterday. no need to worry." Vinny: after a brief pause you hear a quiet sigh of relief in your head followed by words said in a whispered hush "i cant quite speak right now but. thank you so much, i mean that genuinely" followed by the typical silence Cimmorro: cimm scrunches his face a bit but will continue going abt his merry way then

Soon after he makes his way back to Swallow’s Perch, second after Han, and settles in their shared room. In the meantime Plum takes the time to pick out a few items from the store shelves as gifts for their family, chatting with Cole once they bring them back over to the counter to purchase them.

Chip: the cat seems to stare at you for the duration of this transaction Plum: "what's this one's name?" Cole: she turns her head and scratches its head "this ones coal"  Plum: plum snickers. "what? did vinny name this one before or after meeting you??" Cole: she laughs "before! before! this guy here's my senior teaching me the ropes" the cat starts purring Plum: "right, how long have you been round here again?"  Cole: she stretches back thinking "hmmmmm a year ago now...probably two actually" she scratches her chin "it's a nice city though, the airs so ...fresh around here even though its so busy" Plum: "yeah it is nice. too bad i'm not sticking around for much longer, i wanted to see the ocean better  " plum says, mostly conversationally. "anyways, thanks for the stuff. and good luck getting that wizard lady to let go of vinny, also." plum huffs out a laugh. "poor guy." Cole: she pumps her fist "im getting him back here at some point at least! maybe ill wrangle ezra into it..." she thinks to herself before turning back "you should head down to some of the docks soon, they're real fun for peoplewatching" she says with a smile walking over with you back to the front door Plum: [pumps fist in return] "maybe i'll do that later then, thanks. seeya." Cole: she sees you out with a wave and locks the door behind you as it jingles, getting back to...you're not sure what she was doing actually. Finn: PLUM GOT HER ROUTE UNLOCKED Han: DONT SQUANDER UR CHANCE FOR A CUTE GF Plum: i will Han: oTL

Content with their purchases Plum heads back to their inn to begin their transfer to the Swallow’s Perch. Slightly ahead of them, Psalm and Rokka return to the Hole in the Wall and get the few things they have all sorted to go. 

Heading out they note that at the front desk this time appears to be Artie as opposed to the other two employees that work there, perhaps they have their hands full with something at the moment. He silently notes the duos departure and mail transference with a surly nod. 

Artie: at mention of the swallow’s perch he tilts his head and remarks “good place. got decent pie there” sending you on your way Psalm: "Also, if  Ruth and Esther Brimdrorvi come looking for me can you direct them down the street  please." Artie: he nods silently Psalm: Nice Rokka: i give artie my farewells and wait for psalm bc wynaut 

> 🎵   A Tavern on the Riverbank / The Witcher 2 OST 

The two make their way to the inn next door, after a bit of chatter with Layne he leads them upstairs and directs them to the empty rooms they have upstairs on the first floor, adjacent to Cimmorro and Han’s shared room. 

Rokka: "what room are u going to?" Psalm: "I have no preference." That being said he just goes up to the first empty room he finds and opens the door. Rokka: he nods and walks a little further down the walkway and goes into the second room

The two each take an empty room for themselves, forcing those who show up afterwards to decide who they’d prefer to room with. Across the street Keva also checks out of the Out and Inn similarly asking for her mail to be rerouted. At the counter are the two twins who quickly send her on her way

Flinn and Pin: they remark that one of the dwarves there will give you beer at a discount if you tell him a funny joke, but do not specify which one. Keva: she makes a face like 🤨 but with an amused smile "okay... thanks?" and heads over to the swallow's perch

As Rokka and Psalm settle in across the way, Cimmorro in his room takes has a thought and decides to shoot off another sending spell to another important recipient.

Cimmorro: "ulle!!! it's your cimmy. i wanted to show off what i can do now ehehe i'm going to be so cool when i get back" <--- he sounds very excited Ulle: you hear a confused sound in your head in response before spluttering noises and a response "whoa i was-bleh, eating a sandwich just now you scared me! haha this is so cool hey hey mahalia ! cimmorro just spoke to me-" before it cuts off

As Han’s shuffling about and doing some menial tasks around the rooms on the first floor she overhears the sending spell and pokes her head in to spy on Cimmorro. At the same time Keva soon arrives at the inn, getting the same spiel from Layne downstairs she heads up to the first floor hallway staring at which room to pick while Han blocks one of the doorways.

Keva: she does not want to room with psalm and his spying ghost. she does not want to room with rokka bc headache. she does not want to room with han bc headache........... but she figures she has to talk with cimm anyway so........ least of the evils Chip: women and cimm united front Cimmorro: clerics who respect women

Han: "were you talking to someone?" Cimmorro: cimm plops his back into his bed, completely relaxed and thanks wee jas in his head "ohhhh... this is one of the best things you've ever let me have!! thank you, thank you, lady wee jas >_<" and then notices han come in and acknowledges her. "hm? i was casting a spell... did you need anything?" Keva: keva's standing behind han blocking the doorway, in that time she is considering whether she should change her mind Han: she shrugs "nothing, just heard u talking, got curious- AH" at keva teleporting behind her and stares at her for 2 seconds before going "im going back to chores, bye" and scuttling off Cimmorro: he just looks at you two like 🤨 Keva: she moves out of her way and says bye back after she's already left like 🤨 "any room in here?" Cimmorro: he looks at you for a moment before understanding what's going on "oh you're staying here? that makes things so much easier for me. yeah there's room, though han can be a bit energetic" he laughs and points at a spot in the room Keva: she looks back in the direction han left for a moment "yeah that's going to be fun" /s, she'll go over and plop her few things down Cimmorro: a laugh "she's like that... though she can easily be distracted lolll... i think she'll be more focused on dress making than at you, for tonight at least." Keva: keva tosses her cloak on the bed while mumbling "thank the gods for that." turning to cimm "does she work here or smth?" Cimmorro: he nods at you as he sits back up on his bed "she was already here when i arrived a few weeks ago. i'm sure she's been here for way longer" Keva: "hm. well, don't let me get in the way of what you were doing." and she gonna climb onto her bed and take out a little bit of bread to feed amos Cimmorro: he watches you do that for a sec before going "okay, i'm still beat from going around the stores earlier myself so... we can talk about what you want to do with your outfit later. give it some thought meanwhile.."

As Keva settles in, Han remembers to head over to Ferrie Chris and notify her that Finn will probably be showing up later in the week.

Han: "the pampered one will come later... ill borrow the cart to fetch him, if its ok.." Ferrie Chris: she tilts her head from where shes bent over moving crates "hm? sure whatcha need it for anyhow? Han: han shrugs "he needs some stuff moved" Ferrie Chris: she squints "how much stuff could tha' guy have...?" she shakes her head "eh 's fine, we moved most of the stuff earlier in the week anyway" Han: SHE SHRUGS HARDER

As the two of them chat Cimmorro and Psalm both begin the process of attuning to their newly bought weapons in their rooms, though Psalm also goes through the additional ritual of designating his new scimitar as his pact weapon.

Ghester: for the latter ritual ghester is silent the entire while until the end in which he lets out a sigh, quickly remarking how strange a sensation that was Psalm: "Strange how?" Ghester: he ponders the thought a moment "like growing another limb, despite the fact that i dont have any in the first place" Psalm: he nods like he gets it even though that's kinda weirdchamp

As the group settles for the afternoon Plum also arrives at the inn, the last of the party to make their transfer for the day. Receiving the same spiel as those before them they waddle up to the first floor, deciding to pick whoever is behind the closest door to them for their roommate, the result being Rokka.

Chip: for your viewing pleasure

Cimmorro: AKFHJLKASFKSAJFAKLWFKAL Han: EMO A;LKDHGKLLKDSF Keva: I'M LAUGHING THAT GHESTER AND AMOS COME WITH US NOW Chip: your government assigned leeches

Rokka: his ears twitch and he turns towards the door "come in!!" Plum: "oh it's you rokka, nice. you don't mind being roommates do you?" Rokka: he perks up seeing plum enter, "oh plummy!! hi!! i don't mind at all in fact im glad we can be roomies hehehe" rokkas tail wags in delight Plum: "ok great, what are you up to for the rest of the day, then?" Rokka: "hmm" he taps his chin and looks up to think "nothing much unless you wanna do something with me? :D" Plum: "i'm not up to anything today, so sure. got anything in mind?" Rokka: "we can work on that music box you got!!" Plum: "oh, right! forgot about that thing." plum says, and starts fishing around in their bag of holding until they pull out the ＭＵＳＩＱＵＥ ＢＯＸＥ Rokka: he moves next to plum and leans his head closer to them "i don't know much about fixing music boxes so I don't think i will be much help but i can cheer you on :D" he tilts his head a little "whaddya think it would sound like once it can play" Plum: "i think it'll probably play, just not very well. i'm not even sure how this thing is broken. also thanks, if you cheer me on that means i definitely have to fix this thing though." plum says, lifting the box carefully to peek at it. Rokka: "yeah i had a feeling it would sound like that too...i cant wait to hear it in its full glory" rokka goes 🥺 and speaks with a little gentler tone "i just thought its another way i could help you is all." Plum: a little embarrassed now plum just says "right..." and trails off. then after a moment of looking at the box they say, "y'know this thing might not actually be broken after all. so it only plays on a full moon, right? and i thought that was just some kind of charm attached to it for fun or somethin', probably is. but other than that it's a functional music box. think the seller thought that little catch to it meant it didn't work." plum says this all in one go without realizing because they like to talk about magical objects. "personally," they continue, "i don't think that means it's broken. i think that just makes it more special. i could probably make it so that it plays all the time though, what do you think?" Rokka: he silently nods throughout plums explanation simply enjoying them talking more than usual in one sitting, "thats a bummer we gotta wait until then for it to play but if you can make it play ALL the time that would be super cool of you plum!" he gives them a thumbs up Plum: "well i can try, anyways." 

> 🎵 Tired Rynoka / Moonlighter OST

Plum begins working away at the music box as Rokka sits attentively beside them for the rest of the day. In their own mind they decide their course of action is going to be to change the enchantment into a dual purpose one. A person will still need to wind the music box on a full moon to have it play, but it will also play whenever if Rokka is the one to wind it.

Getting to work on inspecting it Plum finds the enchantment is inscribed weirder than they’d thought it would be once they actually get a look at it. Most of the evening is spent trying to make out the creators handwriting, but it is solid progress nonetheless. After much interpreting they see the enchanted name signed near the bottom thusly " -ＲＡＮＤＯＶＵＳ / THE GREAT AND BEAUTIFUL"

Han: randovus instant fave character no lie Rokka: whoever this is i wanna fight them Plum: chip was it that the seller thought it was broken??? Chip: yeahp Plum: oh LOL Chip: zafar like what in the....not gonna ruin my day [puts on shelf] Plum: hHHHFHFG

Plum: "this guy's handwriting fucking sucks" Rokka: he makes a weird sound of agreement as he doesnt wanna admit it "mmmnnyyeeahmnn?????????" Plum: "anyways, that's all i got for you today re: this thing. might take me a couple days." plum says, without telling rokka what exactly they're intending to change about the box until it gets done. Rokka: he oohs and ahhh through the process of what plum does "neat! you got me excited now that I know i can probably hear it sooner!" his tails lazily wags in content and a little nostalgic spending time with plum like this in a room as they remind him of his siblings Plum: "yeah, i'm pretty excited too. and its fun working on something for...fun. i feel like its been forever, even though its only been like, a week. feel free to tune in next time." Rokka: "yeah! i getchaaa especially with what we've been through having some time to just enjoy like this is nice hehe" he tilts his head at plum "really?? then please let me know whenever you choose to work on it! I will be there to watch and cheer asap! thanks for letting me watch plum  " Plum: "any time. i can make it a little task while we wait for the ball and all of that." Rokka: he stares at plum for a moment seeming to ponder something "plum, you're really nice. I like you, can we be friends?" he says without his usual loud and cheery tone. this time being more calm as he asks genuinely for the first time Plum: "h-huh?" plum says after a beat, suddenly turning fully red in the face. "man, rokka, why do you sound so serious... and! a-anyways! i thought we were already friends?" Rokka: "I just never-- wait what???i---" he struggles with finding words to respond as he didn't think plum thought they were friends "you.....we're friends? really? really really friends?" he looks expectantly down at plum Plum: "oh i mean i just assumed since we get along and we're stuck in this large group for now. maybe i jumped the gun there, sorry. but yeah we can be friends." plum says and scratches at their face, feeling embarrassed. "you're making me feel kinda embarrassed over here, saying "i like you" to people so bluntly, y'know." Rokka: he lets out a small gleeful laugh with a smile growing larger each second "ah...ahah!! yess!!!!!!!!" he ruffles plums hair "Sorry, I just like to be honest, hehe," now in a very great mood he cant help his wagging tail Plum: [is ruffled] "no it's fine, just caught me by surprise. i like to be blunt too 🤨 " plum says and coughs a little awkwardly. Rokka: he just grins at plum before plopping onto his bed with a content sigh followed by a mumble "my first friend.."

As the afternoon ebbs on Cimmoro also finishes attuning to his new healing knife in his room, the other two going about their business in silence and settling in. Finally he moves and stretches, and gives the knife a stare, he decides to give it a whirl and to check whether he’s been scammed or not. He tightly gripes the blade with one hand and makes a swift cut on his hand, he makes a low hissing sound as he does, alerting the other two briefly as they spot his hand bleeding for a couple of seconds

Han: han just stares like 🤨 Keva: keva was feeding amos the little snack thing she bought from the pet store, but when she hears cimm hiss, she looks over her shoulder. when she sees the blood and the knife she jumps a bit in surprise like "what the fuck?"

However, despite how quickly he made the wound, once he expends the charge, it heals just as quickly, glowing slightly for a brief moment as the skin stitches itself back together, like there was nothing there in the first place. They watch even as the blood quickly rises through the air and zooms back into his body from the wound.

Han: she stares at the immediately closing wound "that..what?" Keva: she's also staring in confusion and curiosity Cimmorro: he watches the wound heal itself, wonder in his eyes and then immediately puts his palm up for han and keva to see it stitch up like ":D SICK...!!" Han: "is magic? thats cool" she pokes the part where he sliced himself Cimmorro: he breathes out in relief "wuhahhu... looks like i got my money's worth..." when han pokes at his palm he goes like "yeah! you wanna try?" Han: "fuck yeah!" han holds out her forearm excitedly >:D Cimmorro: "it only works when i do it though" he's taken aback by your enthusiasm but likes it regardless. cimm swipes the blade on your arm, making a clean cut [will use charge] Keva: she makes a 🤨 face at han's enthusiasm and closes up the jar of treats to put it away as she says "no thanks" .... she does turn back to watch tho

Cimmorro slices again this time on Han’s arm.....blood...a second...thwoosh the body stitches itself back together immediatley and the wound is healed.

Cimmorro: "aw cmon we can do it one more time" once han's wounds begin stitching too he looks back at keva like "see? see?" Han: "oooh.." han goes over the wound with her hand "its only a bit tingly... wanna try it over actual wound?" Cimmorro: he turns to han looking confused for a sec like "... wait are you injured?" Han: "no, but keva can stab me" :D “or you stab with the knife normally. i just trust keva to make it count” 😌 Keva: "you're really excited about being stabbed" Cimmorro: cimm is wondering why han wants to hurt so badly rn and his mouth is just agape Han: "wounds are an honour" Cimmorro: "what... well, i guess?" Han: "well, more in battle than in here but still"  Keva: "is that why you tend to go into things without thinking" Han: "without think-?! i think a lot, thank you !!!!" han sounds offended Keva: keva makes geralt from netflix "hm" noise "kay well, i'm not stabbing you so" Han: han pouts "your loss" then goes back to looking at cimm expectantly with her forearm to him Cimmorro: "okay, ladies.... let's...." he sighs "this dagger can do as much damage as it can heal, supposedly... so... to test?" he looks like he doesnt want to tho Han: "to test!" >:) Keva: "we already know it works. why do we have to do this" Cimmorro: "just to be sure!" Han: "to test!" han repeats Cimmorro: "you're not going to hold this against me are you? if i stab you like real stab?" cimm is starting to wonder if this is a good idea Keva: keva puts her hand to her face Cimmorro: he makes a fake stab against the air right now just to make sure han knows what she's asking him to do "like this, stab stab" Han: "huh?? why would i?? plenty of family have stabbed me, just do it" she doesn’t flinch Cimmorro: he completely sputters at that "do-what tthe ?!? the HUH?" Keva: keva's slient for a moment in shock as well and then "...gods you're so weird" Han: han tsks impatiently "i can do it myself, yeesh" takes out her own dagger Cimmorro: "no, WHAT? STOP" Keva: "(medieval fantasy equialvent of jesus christ)"

Han makes a clean slice along her forearm without flinching, taking damage, much to the displeasure of her two roomates.

Han: the dagger looks similar to the hammer shes taken out before, one solid chunk of blueish metal Keva: she winces watching it happen and is like, getting up off her bed Han: "nnnow try it" :) Cimmorro: cimm looks horrified not bc of the wound but bc of han just being so.... han. he clicks his tongue while he makes a weary slice on her already open wound, expending a charge

With a glow the wound stitches together again and the blood zips back in, the wound is not fully healed but it looks alot less bad now, closer to a papercut but long across the arm.

Han: "ooooo~" Cimmorro: cimm lets out a sigh of frustration and keeps han's arm in place while he grabs his holy symbol to cast cure wounds on the leftover cut :( Han: han lets him but is like :/ Cimmorro: cimm lightly blows and pats on her arm as if to check if he missed a spot then lets her go once cleared out. "this thing is more for emergencies, it looks like" tilting the doctor's blade a bit with his free hand Han: han wiwis for a sec Keva: keva relaxes back onto her bed once the wound is healed Cimmorro: "since we'll be travelling together for a while it's good to let you guys know what this does, though i won't use it unless i really have to... i don't like relying on things aside from what i already know anyway..." he puts it away and then looks at han like :| "no more stabbing yourself like that" Han: han goes 😤 "this was for teeeest!" Cimmorro: cimm remembers how han also just nonchalantly sliced her arm in the blood chamber and he rubs at his eyes at the memory "you do this kind of thing so often!! what the hell was that about your family!! uggh" he just keeps rubbing his eyes rn trying not to think of what he was to deal with the next coming weeks Han: han just goes 😟 but says nothing Keva: keva notices the look on han's face and says "anyway." Cimmorro: cimm stares at her and sighs and shakes his head Han: han gets weirdly shy under the attention Cimmorro: "no more hurting yourself. if that's what your family liked to do then whatever. but don't do it around me.. don't like seeing it" he says that rather harshly but there is a hint of concern Keva: keva like a sibling looking out the car window while the other kid gets chewed out Han: han is still like 😟  "no its.. they didnt.. uagh" she looks frustrated by both not wanting to talk about it and not knowing how to explain it, and just drops the thread entirely , pacifying cimm with a non commital "i wont, i wont" Keva: keva just quickly raises and lowers her eyebrows, thinking well that sounds convincing in her head Cimmorro: cimm doesn't seem convinced, but it's not like he expected his words to do anything immediately. he exhales and waves his hand around to clear the air "well... anyway. you two know what this does. don't go stabbing me back when i bring you conscious with this pls..🙄 " Keva: keva waves a hand like yeah yeah Han: han snort laughs a bit and also agrees Cimmorro: he shrugs as if to say he's just trying to make precautionary measures "nice. well okay you are cuties dismissed 👏" he hops off his bed and walks out the door peace out 

Cimmorro scurries about preparing things for later on, and as sundown and evening comes the rest of the party settle into their rooms and comforts for the night. Han however, after a bit more pestering of Cimmorro, heads out after clocking off her shift, and walks off towards a familiar destination in the city.

She weaves her way in and out of a few alleys and streets in the business district before entering one of the taller buildings nearby. Despite there having been no rain recently she also spies puddles of water near the outside of the building. Shrugging it off, she heads inside and up a few flights of stairs down some interior hallways, past the doors of a couple other businesses

it’s pretty quiet in the area compared to when she’d usually come around, with the sounds of people revel making and drinking typically filling her ears. She  quickly comes to the entrance of the place she’s looking for, the words ‘The Bone Pit’  scrawled nested into a carefully illustrated poster nailed to the front of the door.

> 🎵 Through the Valley / Pyre OST 

She opens the door and steps inside, finding herself in a small lobby area of sorts, connected to a larger room that appears to be a bar floor with hallways leading upstairs branching off it. Though looking about it appears pretty empty and quiet, not silent however, some chatter here and there and the sounds of things being moved echo through the place. As she stares about it appears pretty sparse, its then that she notices a whole bunch of cleaning supplies stacked around the place.

Han: she just says loudly "hellooooo?? ruel? stella?"

As Han yodels out the names, someone shuffling around the larger bar floor seems to notice and comes running over, she recognises the woman as Stella, a short pink haired girl.

Stella: “ahh sorry there!!” she gives a cutesy wave “were closed right now for -er” she blinks now seemingly recognising you “oh my gods haaaaaaan, i'm being forced to do manual labouuuur- save me pleaaase” her tone changes to an uncharacteristically whiny one as she dramatically walks over pouting and shaking a mop that she’s holding in her hands. 

Looking at her Han notes she’s not in what her typically style, instead in clothes that appear to be much more shabby, probably for cleaning. Behind her she also spots a taller person, whom she recognises as Ruel, a half orc woman leaning herself against a broom 

Ruel: “...stella that’s like the 5th walk in, did you even put the closed sign out front..?” shaking her head as if she doesn't even expect an answer from the former. Han: han laughs at stella "you are such a baby." she notes their dress and says "cleaning day? do u want extra hands?" Stella: she lazily throws her head back with a groan “auuugh because of the lockdown the other day the good big boss decided this would be the perfect time to scrub down the whole place” she holds the mop out in front of her “this isnt in my job description y'know, i'm going to have to get my nails redone and everything after this, its tough work looking this perfect” she continues huffing a little before actually realising you asked a question "ah? oh no way we cant make customers help out, bad look..." Ruel: while she chats ruel crouches near the floor fiercely inspecting a stain in the wood near a bar table Han: "with the amounts of fluids this place sees daily i cant believe it took you this long to do deep clean....." han grimaces a bit but its still finds stellas baby attitude funny so it gets a bit lost. "and what? there are no customers around, no one sees me here. i asked a couple hours off." Stella: "ehh well it gets cleaned regularly but i guess she really wants these bar floors finally annihilated" she grimaces at the comment before looking back at you "y.........eaaaaaah but if i got caught doing that i'd get an earful is the thing" she waves her hand noncommittally though she looks like she is internally fighting off the temptation to just let you Han: han is just holding back laughter at stella like ppfftt "im sure you can do it, youre big girl" and then walks over to ruel and opens her arms for a hug Stella: she groans again and shakes the mop menacingly at you Celebrity Guest Aqua: is this like those clubs where they gotta hose the floor every morning or is it a nicer establishment  Han:

Cimmorro: hate that gif so much dawg   Chip: STOPPPPP Han: I AHTE THIS GIF TOO IT PLAGUES ME Plum: what is that fucking gif lord

 As Han walks over to Ruel with outstretched arms she stands up curiously staring at her with a quirked brow.

Han: "i know ure off work but one hug pleeeaaase" >_< Ruel: she stares at you again but eventually sighs and opens her arms out invitingly like 😓 Han: "Oh! i actually came over to ask. me and some ..." han makes some grimacing/thoughtful expressions "friendsss?? like saved the town or whatever and they invited us to be guests at the new ball, do you guys wanna come??" :3 Ruel: ruel just ?? confused face at the question after the hug  Stella: she turns her head towards you leaning on the mop completely disbelieving "if you ya want to invite me to a party han you dont need to lie about how cool it is" she says wrly Han: she probably has let go of ruel at this point lolol "no we talked to the king and shit.." han shrugs "its in 2 week, cimm, that priest guy, i dont think i told you about him, he even drew me a dress!" she starts looking around her bag "oh i must've left it with him... well anyway!" han is still in a chipper mood "you guys and the swallows perch are my only friends around so i thought i would invite you" she does get pink at this lol Ruel: she makes a face like 😑❓  silently thinking to herself Stella: she walks over and slaps her hand across your stomach jokingly "yeah and what did the king tell you?" she seems to be a little embarrassed about the only friends statement but is way to distracted by the ridiculousness of the gala thing Han: "uuhhh he was like [han tries to imitate his voice] thank you so much, here is 5000 gold, we are doing ball in 2 weeks, invite your friends. i have the gold to prove it" han opens her heavy ass stash and shows the girls the coin

Stella looks like shes about to crack another joke until Han opens up the bag, after which both her and Ruel open their eyes wide in surprise. Stella looks back between Han and the bag multiple times in shock

Stella: "th... first of all this is like, all platinum han, and second......i...." she stops mid sentence like she doesnt know what to say out of shock Ruel: she pipes up after "........you know they did say they were gonna rehost it...." Stella: at this she seems to snap out of her awe and stares up at han grabbing your giant arm and shaking you "HAAAAAN. YOU CANT BE SERIOUS THE GALA??? LIKE WITH THE ROYALTY AND EVERYTHING???  Han: she gets shaken around "yes, those guys, i dont rlly understand the big deal, ferrie chris was also excited about them?" Stella: "YESSS HAN THOSE GUYSSS" she seems to calm down a little though still gripping your arm "okay okay well im not gonna shoot for the moon or anything so i dont care too much about them but do you know how many rich nobles go to those parties.... the connections i can make there..." she then begins shaking your arm again "and i can brag about having BEEN to the palace my gods what am i gonna wear... i need to create the perfect ensemble, andrella is NOT gonna hear the end of this from me" Han: she laughs "i thought you might like it." she turns to ruel "how about you?" Ruel: as you turn your attention to ruel stella continues babbling to herself while shaking your arm, ruel stands nearby with her arms crossed thinking over it thoughtfully "honestly i am not sure i'd be good schmoozing somewhere so high class but" and she lifts her eyes up seriously with a glint and a thumb on her chin "the opportunity. is way too good." Keva: the egirls looking to get paaaaiiidd yeeeessss Chip: stella getting ready to have 100 business cards made Keva: are they bedazzled Chip: gel pen as well Keva: the other side is sequins that if you run your hand over it it reveals other colors and a message lmao Han: wait thats genius Keva: "stella" one way, "see the stars" the other Han:  UA;LHDSGKH;KHWKH3LKESGKDX

Han: she just heehees "i went dress shopping with cimm today, hes gonna help get something tailored, you want dresses too? i can pay" Ruel: her eyebrows go up "oh no no, we can get that done ourselves fine, you're already inviting us and everything"  Stella: she nods next to you feverishly "han i love you oh so dearly, now even more so, but i have my pride" she lifts a fist "and its telling me to go all out on this look...." Ruel: she nods sagely agreeing with her Stella: she quickly relaxes to a more joking demeanour before continuing "i appreciate the thought though as ludicrous it is for you to offer you big lug, if this works out i wont even have to annoy you to give me free drinks" she says with a smile ^__^ Han: han giggles then stops abruptly "what!! you said you annoy me because i dont let you tie me up!!!" <- she is faux sad Stella: she lifts a finger "i can have multiple reasons to annoy you" Han: she tsks "im glad you two are alright tho 😊 when you think the deep clean will be done?" Stella: she slaps your arm with a laugh at that Ruel: she thinks a moment "judging by how powerful these wood stains are... i'd say another two days with the others helping out" she folds her arms with a smile looking back at you "i'll be sure to expect a visit now that you're rolling large..." she squints her eyes and tilts her head afterwards though thinking on it "...kind of dangerous carrying all that actually" Han: she snorts at the wood stains comment "i dont have a lot to use it on anyway but thieves would be stupid to go for me" puffs out her chest "i will visit... soon? i will be leaving soon after so yeah.." han think thonks Ruel: she laughs at the chest puffing Stella: at the last comment stella tilts her head "ohhh??...flying the coop? you gotta tell me when we can go out for drinks or something, i'll have to console poor ruel.." she mock wipes her eyes  Ruel: she rolls hers and grabs a cloth, getting back to working away Han: she shrugs "dunno, got one other bossman now and he wants us to go to antessa..." han trails off thinking about routes and times "you can grab me whenever you have free day. OH ferrie chris wants have do a banger too..." Stella: "damn moving up in the big leagues of freelancing now, cross country" at the second comment her face lights up "ohhhhh yes! when you have a date let me know i'll free up the evening" she says with a >:) grin Han: han is jsut ^O^ heeho evening successful,  STARTS BIDDING THEM ADIOS?  "no sex, no cleaning, im useless here" pouts again

Han scuttles off back to the inn satisfied with having said her piece, making sure to tell Stella to stop slacking off as she goes. The party all spend the rest of the little of the evening left idling around and killing time before finally heading to rest and bedding down in the dark.

--

Notes

💎Cimmorro and 🔮Psalm attuned to their weapons of choice

🦇Finn upgraded his sword to a +1 weapon

🍺Plum got an evenings work in on the music box

👨‍👩‍👦‍👦👨‍👨‍👧‍👦 Most of the Party relocated to the Swallow’s Perch

[letstalksymphogear]

Symphogear, EP. 6

Last Time on Grand Theft Auto:

Tsubasa recovers from the world’s gayest coma as Hibiki trains her mind while putting aside such silly concepts as “the love of my life” and “literally being with my girlfriend.” After cooling Miku’s paranoia with her brand new washboard abs, Genjuro prepares the team for a pizza run across the city to deliver a dangerously hot pizza pie named Durandal. Chaos emerges as the delivery is intercepted by a rival pizza gang, lead by the nefarious Gremlin known as Yukine Chris. But, before the pizza could be claimed, dedicated pizza deliverywoman Hibiki not only steals it back, but eats it, harnessing the power of the pizza and unleashing cheesy pasta based chaos around the location.

Ryoko is so into it that she taps into her superpowers and protects Hibiki after she passes out. The delivery is considered a failure, and no tip is given.

And so, the journey continues...

Meanwhile, in this weird, tricked out mansion...

Chris meditates on some water metaphors of her own.

“that pacman colored freak took only touching it to activate a cheap ass french sword that gave her weird demon powers and its taken me YEARS to use this dumb stripper outfit and the funny cane that goes with it, what the FUCK man, what even is my life”

“maybe... maybe honeybaked hams ARE that powerful...”

“NO! turkey is the superior meat! it’s healthier, lower in fat, and way more tasty! fuck you! i’ll get my goddamned revenge!”

Chris begins musing about Fine’s motivations to capture Hibiki; during these, we’re treated to some brief image flashbacks of Chris’s life.

Suddenly, those jokes about food are a lot less funny.

It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together as to why this young woman is helping a strange nudist dominatrix spread alien terror across the city of mumblednoises, Japan. She doesn’t really have many an option on the table. It’s either help the weird kinkster with her plans, or die.

Despite everything, she has a high opinion of Fine, for the same reasons someone might have a high opinion of a television show if it were the only show they were ever exposed to. She is deeply afraid of being alone again, because she has lived through such misery that the very thought of existing out in the cold again terrifies the shit out of her.

The Sun rises casually amidst Chris’s thoughts.

“ah shit. it just hit me. i literally have spent the entire night standing here instead of actually going the fuck to sleep. goddamnit.”

On such a devious metaphorical twist, Fine stands behind her as the Sun rises.

“yeah, jokes on you. i couldnt sleep for shit either. turns out, all nude, no blankets? in japan? real bad idea.”

“thats why i decided to GO GOTH, babey! whattaya think? do i give those witchy vibes, huh? real ‘black magic woman’ santana hours? feeling cute, gonna head out with the girls and summon satan in the woods kinda aesthetic looking shit? come on, be real with me. does this not look baller?”

“you look like morticia decided to go to the grocery store to buy some wonder bread, but other than that, its a step up from your usual pussy out attitude, so sure”

“you know i decided to get some brain cells on loan from Brain Cells R Us, and ive been thinking this solomon cane stuff is solomon lame. i dont need this dumb oversized harry potter cosplay prop to get shit done. also, murder is... sorta bad? im still trying to get the brain cell stuff down.”

“i can punch just as good as goody two shoes if not better.”

“lol go do it then champ, im gonna go cut down a forest of trees now”

And so, they both just kinda... stand there.

“QUACK, NEXT SCENE, QUACK”

Meanwhile, Tsubasa is rapidly trying to rehabilitate herself from her wounds like walking like a madman, her IV drip presumably filled with Taco Bell brand Doritos Locos Tacos super spicy nacho cheese. Taco Bell: Live Mas.

“im gonna clear every fucking taco bell in your goddamned memory, kanade”

“think outside the bun! wait, what? that was a taco bell slogan? ah fuck it, im dead. what nerd’s gonna try and correct me?”

“i would, kanade. i am that nerd.”

Tsubasa is hell bent to try and understand Kanade’s simple philosophy of helping others selflessly. Unfortunately, when Kanade died, she took all the brain cells between them in the process, so coming to this epiphany is a work in progress.

“listen its a fucking miracle you are 1. alive and 2. able to have your blood run on the garbage melted plastic taco bell tries to dupe people into believing is cheese so why dont you just lie down and think of better franchises to eat from”

“no! you dont understand! taco bell is a franchise of the PEOPLE! their meals are cheap and filling and- and the chicken quesadillas are of good quality for their price! i promised kanade- my vow to the death. taco bell... ergh... now and forever... i-”

“wait. my gay senses are tingling.”

It’s Hibiki, probably running track with Miku.

“oh yeah... her... i should probably apologize to her. about trying to kill her. and then letting her almost be kidnapped. and just giving her a general hard time about something that wasn’t explained to her in the slightest for months. she’s a good bean.”

Tsubasa proceeds to never canonically apologize to Hibiki throughout the entirety of all 4 seasons of Symphogear.

Look at em run. See, it’s a metaphor, because they haven’t communicated yet and they’re running from their problems! But they’re running towards Tsubasa, who is part of the representative problem these two share! Clearly literary genius.

It’s like someone went halfway into writing an NTR plotline and went “maybe this isn’t a good idea to market our songs on.”

Hibiki is still thinking about her Hellshake Yano moment with Durandal. Mainly how she nearly killed someone with it. Hibiki is very starkly in the “killing is bad, and wrong” camp of morality, a trait currently unique to her that she’ll wind up teaching literally everyone else she meets one way or another.

Some could argue the L stands for Lydian, and they’re wrong. It stands for Lesbian.

“that was one hell of a run, hibiki! im pooped! why dont we go to the locker room and call it a day, have a nice shower and just get some dinn-”

“this is the last straw.

i clean your plates. i cook your food. we eat, shit, shower, and sleep in the same FUCKING area, and this is how you repay me? huh? you think being your wife is easy shit, hibiki? half the damn time you’re running off like clark kent having food poisoning and the other half ive gotta babysit you, the emotional equivalent of a preteen clown, to make sure your life doesn’t self destruct harder than Atlantis sinking into the ocean. im done! i am DONE. im reopening my tinder, im slamming my ass BACK into okcupid, and im gonna date some CUTE ACADEMY GIRLS that treat me BETTER than this ABSOLUTE BETRAYAL OF HEART AND IM NOT CRYING I SWEAR ITS JUST THE SWEAT IN MY EYES AND HIBIKI HOW COULD YOU-”

“oh yeah, sure! hey, lemme just do a few more laps, ive just been feeling judgmental about myself and my figure, you know? gotta push myself further...”

“o-oh yeah, sure. no worries, ill wait for you. love you too, hibiki...”

The girls bathe together, as good friends typically do.

“hey you ever notice the showers here have like, weird psuedo-luxurious minipools to bathe in? like, how rich is this school?”

“whoever made this place is either rich or a pervert. or both, probably!”

Miku remarks that Hibiki has changed since she’s entered Lydian, in a manner most unheterosexual.

“oh FUCK you really DO have washboard abs now! ohhh my god.”

“damn, those abs were heavenly. let’s get pancakes later.”

I won’t screenshot it but something to note is that they actually wear each other’s corresponding underwear colors (or even, if you want to examine more closely, each other’s underwear). Here’s an equivalent scene to give you the mental image.

This is the face of someone who knows what they want and already have it. Such is the power of Kohinata Miku.

Meanwhile, Genjuro comes back from the funeral of the guy the Americans filled violently and with impunity.

“yo that all black look looks baller. i should borrow that look... id look pretty gothy in it.”

“ryoko i sympathize with your sharp, fashionista eye but this was for a funeral, i was paying my respects to the dead. thats the usual dress code.”

“didnt know they updated that. i remember back in my day, we just went in white garments and chanted in latin!”

“shit was fire. literally. lots of funeral pyres.”

“lmao ryoko buddy your larping sessions arent actual history”

“hey dont shit on larping around me. i used to be a professional larper while i was majoring in acting. helped really sell my career when i had to pretend to slay the Dark Lord Jyarloen atop the mountain of skulls in Hargobor after my family was killed by the Dark Army. asshole.”

“haha yeah, larping, thats cool yeah, i do that

i...

i larp.”

“oh yeah? you wanna join my larping session sometime then? we’re gonna do an ancient babylon plot thats inspired by some anime, itll be fun”

“.....................................im super into realism.”

“i know im dressed for a funeral but id like to not part ways with my dignity yet. besides, we’ve got serious shit to talk about. basically, we’re on the verge of getting shitcanned.”

As it turns out, the death of this politician removed the last obstacle of opposition to maintain the 2nd Division, as the average criticism against the 2nd Division is “why are we funding this mystery division when we don’t know what they do”. Of course, the sensible idea for an organization that defeats the Noise is to declassify it, given people of different jobs and positions have physically seen the Symphogear in action, but you know. “Oh no, the other governments will come after us” stick gets shaken.

“im in a union. i know my rights. you’re not taking my acting job here away from me.”

“im not going back to be a preschool teacher. its been ten year. the bites on my ankles still havent healed...”

“yeah man, shit sucks ass. i cant fund my adoption habits if im fired.”

Look at these cinematic parallels. Symphogear truly is a franchise made by someone living in 3030.

“worst part is the new minister is super into america. he’s a... westaboo.”

“a westaboo?”

“westaboo?”

“did he just unironically say westaboo”

“he said westaboo. oh my god. this is the hell timeline.”

“i mean people kept calling me that for worshipping all these fighting flicks so i guess it fit? i dont see the problem here”

Meanwhile, in Lydian Academy...

“so it hit me, right? we’re ALL girls. and we ALL sing. now, humor me a moment. what if... what if we’ve all been recruited to potentially be superheroes... through our singing? like, there’s no coincidence that all this shit happens around us, right? and a famous singer LIVES here? i saw the black cars outside! weird shit is happening here- im not even gonna eat the all you can eat bar anymore!”

“kathy there is literally no such thing as superheroes who sing. this place is more likely to be a organ harvesting op than whatever madness you’re saying”

“what? you need me, a singing superhero, to go stop a problem happening underneath the school, a location meant to recruit young women into potentially becoming fellow crime fighting singers?”

“yeah im too busy poppin’ caps in asses so go kick ass in my place”

“sure!”

“.....................................who ya talkin to, hibiki?”

“the boss! gotta go do a thing again...”

“hibiki, i dont like the fact that capitalism is tearing us apart.”

“you’ve gotta join me in the revolution, hibiki. you. me. luxury automated gay space communism. aint it the dream? share my vision, hibiki. its glorious.”

“n... no...? no gay space communism today? well, what about tomorrow? or the next day? or... maybe the next day? baby steps, you say? but, direction action, hibiki! we’ve gotta strike now!”

“it’s okay hibiki. when i take over the world and destroy all first world government leaders, and unite the globe in my encompassing reign and love... ill make sure to spare you, and be my bride to be.”

“thanks miku. im just not ready yet for the globe to burn in an unending ball of fire as the continents fuse into a new utopia composed of our combined wills. also, ive really gotta go, its genuinely an emergency.”

“for the cause!”

“yes hibiki... for the cause...”

Admittedly, you can see the stages of grief Miku goes through when she sees Hibiki say she can’t join her for pancakes. It’s sad. This side story sucks.

Meanwhile, as it turns out, the problem Hibiki needed to resolve was checking on Tsubasa to see if she hadn’t dissolved into Taco Bell brand hot n’ spicy Tabasco sauce.

“god, cant believe taco bell was closed. now i gotta deliver these lame ass flowers”

“cant wait to get threatened again. wonder what she’ll say. ‘hibiki, i should have killed you when i had the chance.’ or ‘you’re so goddamned weak. i could break your spine with my fingernail’, or some other stuff about metaphors. oh, my stops here”

“HEY BITCH WHATS GOOD-”

“HOLY SHIT”

“you are already”

“dead.”

[chimcharstar]

1 THROUGH 55 AND 1 THROUGH 30 GO GO GO

LETS FUCKIN GO

tumblr please actually make this a keep reading

55 interesting questions you should drop in someone’s inbox

1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

I ALREADY WATCH NETFLIX AND AGONIZE OVER MY STORY

2. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you’ve own/owned?

MY JACKETS. ANY CHEST OBSCURING, BROAD SHOULDERED, COZY JACKET

3. What hobbies would you get into if time and money wasn’t an issue?

DANCING, ID NEED TO GO TO CLASSES OR SOMETHING

4. What would your perfect room look like?

IM ACTUALLY PRETTY HAPPY WITH MY ROOM BUT IVE ALWAYS WANTED A LAVA LAMP, AND 1800 MORE PLANTS COULDNT HURT

5. Do you play sports?

NO

6. What fiction place would you love to go to?

SINNOH REGION

7. What Job would you be terrible at?

DEBT COLLECTION. I WOULD BE GIVING SHIT TO PEOPLE FOR FREE. I COULDNT BEAR BEING ENCOURAGED TO FORCE PEOPLE WHO CANT PAY FOR SOMETHING TO PAY MORE

8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would it be?

SERVING. HOW MANY PLATES CAN YOU CARRY AT ONCE

9. What’s the most annoy habit other people have?

WALKING IN MY SPACE BUBBLE WHEN MY SENSES ARE OVERLOADED

10. What skill would you like to master?

A SECOND LANGUAGE

11. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

THE ONE FROM MY DREAM WHERE I KISSED A GIRL DYED MY HAIR BLUE AND WE ELOPED TO BRAZIL TO RAISE SHEEP

12. What’s your favorite drink ?

THAT CHRISTMAS SHIT. PEPPERMINT MOCHA AT STARBUCKS. A FRIEND GOT IT FOR ME ONCE. NOW I ORDER IT A BILLION TIMES.

13. What state or country would you never like to go back to?

I HAVE NOT TRAVELLED MUCH EVER

14. What songs do you have completely memorized?

I DONT REMEMBER LYRICS SO MUCH, BUT I COULD PROBABLY REMEMBER HOW MANY SONGS GO COMPLETELY

15. Are you usually early or late?

LATE. IM GETTING BETTER THOUGH

16. What takes up too much of your time?

GETTING OUT OF BED

17. What do you wish you knew more about?

SWORDS

18. What are some small things that make your day better?

COFFEE. SOMEONE SAYING SOMETHING NICE TO ME.

19. What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should?

QUEER EYE BUT BY TRANS PEOPLE FOR TRANS PEOPLE

20. Who has impressed you the most with what they’ve accomplished?

YOU. AND ME. ITS GROWTH

21. What age do you wish you can permanently be?

21, SO I HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCKS GOING ON

22. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

13 REASONS, THE BOOK WAS TRIGGERING SO I WONT RISK IT

23. What would be your ideal way to spend you weekend?

TAKING A WALK, HAVING COFFEE, WATERING PLANTS… IM HAPPY

24. What’s something in your life that’s considered a luxury?

I HAVE PERFUME...

25. Is there anything you’re too young/old for?

TO YOUNG TO NEVER DRINK. TOO OLD FOR POKEMON

26. What’s your favorite genre book or movie?

I DONT HAVE THE ATTENTION SPAN FOR EITHER BUT I SEEM TO LIKE URBAN FANTASY A LOT

27. How often do you people watch?

I THINK IM SO POLITE BUT HONESTLY, I QUIETLY SCRUTINIZE SO MANY PEOPLE ON THE TRAIN EVERY DAY AND GUESS AT THEIR PERSONAL HABITS AND SELF IMAGE.

28. What’s the best single day on the calendar?

MY BIRTHDAY, SAGITTARIUS SEASON RULES BABY

29. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?

I DONT KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING PPL HAVENT HEARD OF BUT IM INTERESTED IN BLACK HOLES

30. Do you relax after a hard day?

FOOD. NETFLIX. DECOMPOSING ON TUMBLR

31. What’s the best book or series you’ve ever read?

I HAVENT READ A BOOK I REALLY LOVE IN AGES. HARRY POTTER AND ARTEMIS FOWL WERE MY FAVOURITES GROWING UP, BUT CORNELIA FUNKES BOOKS SLAPPED AND HIS DARK MATERIALS WAS GORGEOUS

32. Where’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?

IDAHO?

33. What’s the most heart warming thing you’ve ever seen?

LUCIFER WAS LIKE YOU DESERVE SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR BORING MIDDLE NAME JANE AND KNOWS THAT EVERY MURDER BREAKS YOUR HEART AND YOU SIMPLY DESERVE BETTER SO NO MORE MOMENTS WHILE THEYRE HAVING A MOMENT AND CHLOE IS WATCHING THIS FUCKING IDIOT AND IVE WATCHED THIS BEFORE SO I KNOW SHES GONNA KISS HIM AND THEN THEY KISS

34. What’s the most annoying question that people ask you?

ANY SMALL TALK QUESTIONS

35. Would you give a 40 minute presentation with no preparation?

YES. ID MAKE THAT SHIT RIGHT UP. SKILLS

36. What’s something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

GIVE ME A HUG AND SOME CHOCOLATE

37. Would you rather go Hand Gliding or Whitewater rafting?

HANG GLIDING

38. Dream car?

SOMETHING I DONT HAVE TO WORRY WILL FALL INTO PIECES AT ANY MOMENT

39. What’s something so many people are obsessed with and you just don’t understand why?

STRAIGHT LOVE SONGS

40. What are you most looking forward to in 10 years from now?

HAVING A CAT

41. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but haven’t gotten to it?

DECORATING THE DOLLHOUSE I RESCUED FROM THE BATHROOM

42. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you all week?

IM NOT VERY FAR THROUGH THE WEEK AND I HAVENT ENJOYED MOST OF IT BUT PEOPLE SAYING ADORABLE THINGS

43. How different was your life one year ago?

NOT A LOT DIFFERENT, IM JUST LONELY IN THE CITY NOW, MINUS A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP, ONE YEAR ON T

44. What/who would you rate 10/10?

MY CACTUS JAKEN. I DROPPED HIM SO MANY TIMES AN ENTIRE HALF OF HIS SPIKES ARE FLAT SCARS. AND LOOK AT HIM. THRIVING

45. What kind of art do you enjoy the most?

GENUINELY MADE ART

46. What do you hope never changes?

MY T PRESCRIPTION

47. What movie title best describes your life?

I LOOKED THROUGH NETFLIX AND I PICK TWILIGHT

48. What website do you visit most often?

TUMBLR

49. What’s something you’re looking forward to this year?

MY BIRTHDAY

50. What’s something you’d like to unlearn?

FINDING A REASON TO CANCEL EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING

51. Where would you spend all your time if you could?

WALKING BY SOME RUNNING WATER

52. What age would you like to live to?

80. THATS MY MENTAL HEALTH ANSWER

53. What’s something you’re most likely to become famous for?

SOMETHING CREATIVE WOULD BE AWESOME

54. What’s something you’re most likely to be arrested for?

CRIMES

55. What’s something you really want but can’t afford?

A CAT

Lgbt+ ask game

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?

I’m even a little shaken by a questioning state right now but for a while I’ve felt the best fit is the androgynous label -- I read a description of it being the purple on a pink to blue scale, both at once but not specifically either one, and something else by itself. I’m also happy with a cryptic masculine grey area. My pronouns are he/him.

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?

During the Puberty 1.0 nightmare, I was basically living someone else’s life, and any attraction I felt wasn’t in relation to myself. I felt disconnected from my body and gender and everything too, and I felt a lot of social pressure to experience a certain type of attraction, fit into a certain role, et cetera, and none of these feelings existed in me at all, so I used to identify as ace. When I realized I was trans, I was too caught up in the, transition safely, my life is a lie, stopping dysphoria drama to focus on this, but I had an idea I might be a gay guy judging from my gay creative writing until I caught feelings for a girl and realized this wasn’t the first time that had happened. Some bi positivity and nonbinary rage later, I am reminded that gender is a joke.

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?

Yes of course A LOT. Starting with my parents, who do it aggressively and maliciously. And plenty from strangers and customers, mostly after hearing my voice pre-transition. It used to hurt terribly because I was dealing with so much other stuff at the time, and one little thing could be the last straw, so I used to react strongly and harshly, to people you express yourself to anyway. On T, I’ve been so much more chill and confident, and it’s less painful to accept that some people just don’t know any better, although that doesn’t change its effect.

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?

I don’t remember, I think it was a high school friend. I vaguely remember texting someone in a bathroom during a crying session at work. My high school friends were all warm and supportive.

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?

It was scary as hell. I’m sure coming out (with your gender specifically) is scary by nature because it’s a huge truth to be telling that can really change how the people you love perceive you, for better or for worse, but for me, I’m also thinking with the dread and certainty that my family would be too conservative and potentially dangerous. Coming out to my family was one of the worst, most painful things I’ve ever been through -- being kicked out and laughed at, a lot of drama, confrontations, Bible readings and being ganged up on at odd hours, trying to comfort my mom who took it as her personal failure -- I was shaking with adrenaline 24/7. I think of the “I’ll suffer through anything as long as it has meaning” comment that was about angsty fanfics, but knowing the truth about myself was a source of unshakable strength and it felt refreshing and even triumphant to say, like I was giving myself permission to exist for the first time. I came out a bunch of times, though...

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?

My family reacted mostly badly, my sister is a little confused but has the spirit, and my friends have been wonderful.

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?

It’s more of a gender thing, but I hate it when people imply that I shouldn’t be on T or are subtly trying to talk me out of it with their questions. After all the disrespectful as fuck bullshit I heard from my parents, I’m tired of this.

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.

Zombie apocalypse denim? Gay Layers

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?

I’m not really emotionally invested in these “ships” you cool kids are talking about. I like canon, age-appropriate ones.

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

I’ve never really worn makeup. I brazenly never bothered to growing up, and if it had an effect on me socially, I was too tuned out to care. My sister always wanted to do my hair and makeup, but I wasn’t interested and wouldn’t let her, much to her frustration. I wore some for a musical once though, and I had no idea what I was doing and it was extremely uncomfortable. I felt what I know now is dysphoria and ended up using the lipstick to draw. Another aspect to this is my family forbade it (or my dad made the decision for everyone), not that it made my sister feel less pressured to wear it, so maybe it was some female presentation I could easily get out of. For that reason, I don’t have super strong feelings about it. Not understanding it probably resulted in me feeling left out a lot among my peers.

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?

Yes. Before my realization, it was a numb horror I wasn’t consciously aware of, ruining nice things growing up to the point where I feel like I missed out on being a teenager. I remember it as feeling nauseous while sitting in a corner, feeling like none of my clothes ever fit for some mysterious reason. Living with my family in the closet, it defined my life, and I was obsessed with my presentation. These days, it does not bother me on that level at all, except a minor freakout now and then if I get really wild and wear feminine clothes. Or I still feel it in more subtle ways, when I default to customer service voice, or when guys my age are twice my height and I look aaaall the way up at them and wonder what gender they see me as.

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?

Trust me, I have heard truck loads of dumb shit and the winner is the Gay Agenda is R****a’s propaganda to weaken the integrity of North America. Considering what is happening over there, it was enragingly stupid.

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

I feel like I can be myself around lgbt+ people. I don’t feel like I have to hide stuff or put on a show, and I’m not afraid because it’s familiar territory.

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

Aside from obvious problems like TERFs, ace discourse. Ace people are part of the community if they want to be and that’s enough on that, my skin is already breaking out.

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?

I finally went to a Pride event this year! I was surprised it was the first one I’d been to, then remembered my parents discouraged me from going anywhere, never mind to a gay where.

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?

I can’t think of many people right now, but Leslie Feinberg seems awesome, and some quotes from Stone Butch Blues are very validating.

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

No. Technically I have been in one, but it was shitty and ridiculous, and basically platonic, and I don’t want it to count.

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?

I barely read… I read Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe in high school and it was honestly so precious.

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?

Yes. I got kicked out (but then kicked back in again), had my stuff stolen and damaged, was verbally harassed… and I was indirectly fired by an employer, but We Will Never Know Why...

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?

Queer Eye! I don’t know of many though, and some important ones, I just haven’t watched.

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?

My mutuals :D

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?

I’m okay calling myself queer.

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?

No, but I did see some drag performances at the one (1) Pride event I went to, and they were jaw-dropping.

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?

I’m not sure what this question means, but I decide what fits right by what makes me feel the most alive and emotionally real and in the moment. What makes me feel the most attractive to be honest. There’s a post about dysphoria I saw going around, the things on it are basically what I use to figure things out.

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?

I am actually! Not anytime soon, but I’m the responsible type for sure, and judging by the way I love growing plants and being around animals, I’m probably a nurturing person. I actually like kids too, lol, they’re just so high-energy.

What identity advice would you give your younger self?

You’re a boy. Go!

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I think people are going to have different ways of expressing themselves that make them happy, but… I don’t think they should infringe on basic human decency. When I hear “role” I think of acting a certain way because someone told you to, something I want to disagree with on the spot.

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?

People move out of my way on the sidewalk and take me seriously now. Privilege or self-confidence… I never want to forget what it used to be like, or get too entitled.

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?

That it’s simply living one’s reality. I think that trips up a lot of straight people -- that some people just come like this, and they don’t have to make it fit into their personal identity.

Why are proud to be lgbt+?

Because I worked hard to be alive and happy right now. I’m proud of choosing to get through those rough patches, take care of myself, heal, take walks, cook breakfast, learn healthy coping mechanisms, that was out of love for myself and a defiant conviction that I have a place in this world.

[sociallychallengedbookworm]

Trigger Warning: Mental Illness

Okay this is a really long one, but I found these papers where I was writing down my feelings and I think it was leading up to me making a suicide note or this was going to be mine. But, things have gotten better and I’m going to post what I wrote in the hopes to encourage others that things can get better. This was made in September of 2017, when I was in the darkest point of my Depression. When I actually attempted about a month later to commit suicide/was going to. (i got distracted by youtubers: Dan and Phil cuz I had them on the background cried myself to sleep on the bed.) Dan released “Daniel and Depression” Soon after and it helped to encourage me a little that I wasn’t alone. Anyways. This letter was my darkest point and I wanted to share it since I’ve gotten /mostly/ better in terms of depression and suicidal thoughts. Here it goes, brace yourselves.. its long. (I’m gonna make up names for the people I mentioned in it to conceal Identities)

“I’m getting bad again, like really bad. It was all state auditions today and I bet I flunked site reading portion. I wont make it to all state again and its been a spiral downhill ever since. I know I have failed. I see myself in the mirror and all I see is someone that I hate. I hate the way I look the way fat clings to my stomach. I’m not skinny enough. I’m not good enough and I try so hard to be happy and it never works. I ruin everything. I’m too quiet, too awkward. I fail at everything that I strive for. I’m not smart enough. i’m too lazy. I’m too ugly. I’m not perfect enough. Why am I nor normal? Why can’t I walk into a room and not feel so trapped. Why is it that everytime someone I don’t know tried to talk to me, I get flustered. I can’t breathe, I get nauseous. Social Anxiety? Why can’t I pick up on social cues? Why do I feel the need to flinch away from people? I’m not good enough I’m fucked up. I’m the person who isn’t interesting. I’m the person in the background. I’m here but I have no purpose. What is the point? I know I am loved. I have friends and family that care and that’s why I’m still here. I get cut off in conversation, I am boring and uninteresting. I have no purpose. I can’t meet new people, I can’t show emotion round other and I can’t cry and I can’t let them see. I don’t want to bring anyone into this. I used to cut but not often, I quit. That was a year ago and its worse. I want to rip into my skin and see the blood. I have never cut this much. I don’t know if things are going to get better. Why would they? I can’t make myself happy. It doesn’t really work. My friends’ happiness makes me happy and Id rather see them that way/ I know I’d want my friends to tell if things were this bad? But, I can’t do it. It’s too much It’s overwhelming. Talking to a therapist doesn’t help, it makes me feel like I’m drowning. I feel nothing and everything at all. My problems don’t matter. Hell, what if I’m making all this up? What if it’s just all in my head? Is dying really that bad? I mean, I can’t get the image of my parents finding my body, or my niece living her life without me. What’s on the other side? is it nothing? Is dying painful? Is it less painful than how I feel now? I used to love hugs but now I shy away from any touch. Why can’t I remember being genuinely happy? What is wrong with me? I want to die. I really want to. Maybe I should get help? I don’t want others to know. There’s a lot they don’t know. Why have I changed so much? I need a sharper knife . I’m not normal.

A lot of people would argue that I’m not worthless. I guess its one of those thingswhere you’re your own worst enemy. I’m drowning, in school.. in stress. In my social life. I always struggle in everything. It takes too long for me to warm up to someone. I’m too awkward. I don’t achieve anything that I strive for. I’m losing interest in everything. I want to disappear, but I don’t want to hurt anyone. If I died, how would people at school react? Would they be sad? My friends would. I know they’d go through hell and blame themselves. They’d be mad at me. My family would be devastated. I can’t do that to my sister. What about people I don’t know. People who were there but not. People who saw me in the hallways. What would they say? Would they talk about how sad it was, how they thought I was cool and wished they could have done something? They’d be lying. I’m still here and I am so fucking numb and no one notices a damn thing. They don’t see the way I hide. They’re blind. They’d maybe come to the funeral. They’d talk about how they never knew I was hurting. It was plain as day. How could you not see ? Oh, i’m nice, not nice enough for you to talk to. I talk about being dead inside and I’m not joking. I’m not trying to fit into some “Emo” Aesthetic. Yes, I wear black and all that. But. It’s not like that. I’m not in some huge phase where “Oh life sucks”. I’m struggling/ I’m dropping hints. Help me. I don’t know what to do. Help me before I go too far. I don’t see myself graduating high school, I don’t see myself achieving college goals. and being happy. I don’t see myself having kids. I don’t think I’m going to live much longer. I dont know. Maybe one day I’ll snap and just down a bottle of pills and this will be the only remnants of a note. I’ll chicken out if I actually write a suicide note. What would my internet friends do? How would they find out? I’m sorry. I’m too damaged. I don’t know if it was because of what *name* did. Or how *other name* used me. Maybe it is because *ex boyfriend name* and what they did to me. Why am I still waiting. Why am I never good enough? Why am I so fucking broken? I’m so stupid. Maybe I just don’t deserve to be happy. Maybe if I die, things will get better. I failed everyone. And its not just cuz of my trigger at all state. I tried so hard and I let everyone down. They were counting on me. Am I ever going to be okay? I know I have people who care about me. I know that they would help me. I’m scared. I don’t like being the broken girl. I don’t want to be viewed that way. I don’t want to be constantly greeted with worried glances. I don’t want to hear “How long have you been clean” I just want it all to go away.

How could I tell anyone? My parents will probably brush it off with “Pfft but you smile all the time and you have plenty of friends, you just want attention” I actually hate attention, hate being looked at like I’m some kind of freak. They don’t have the thoughts that I have, They don’t go through every day screaming at themselves and scratching at their sleeves to get the thoughts to stop. They don’t feel the pain. To them I’m just some whiny little 16 year old. Pft hormones or whatever. Maybe it is. Maybe I;m making it up. What’s even the point. Could the school counselor help me? Maybe I should stop trying.

(In really dark and angry letters that are hard to read at the bottom it says: “I’m just a disappointment”

I realize this was really long and I appreciate it if you read it to the end. I look at this and I see recovery. I haven’t fallen into a hole this deep in such a long time and a lot of this I can now look back at and look at my life now and say that it isn’t true. I may have not gotten help professionally, but I reached out to a friend of mine who did everything in his power to talk me down and keep me safe, And I have done the same to him. I just hope that by reading this someone can find some kind of.. help? They can look at this and look at the progress and maybe they can do the same. I also would love to spread awareness. THIS is how BAD depression can get. THESE are the things that run through our heads and NO ONE notices. WE ARE ALONE. It isn’t some made up thing. We aren’t asking for attention. We want help. We want out of this fucking hell before it’s too late. Please. Help us. Look at the signs, check in on your loved ones. We might need it. I’ve talked my best friend out of suicide before and he’s getting help right now and I’m so proud of him. Recovery is possible. Just please, if you need help. seek it.. and if you don’t and you know someone who does.. please do whatever you can.

Not trying to push anyone, but by reblogging this you could potentially help someone, so please I encourage you to do so. Share this story. Do anything you can. Please. 

[jamesgeiiger]

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it?

Book excerpt: In Melissa Leong’s latest book, Happy Go Money, the former Financial Post reporter challenges everyone to revamp their relationship with money. Here’s where to start.

“If I only had a little more money, I’d be happier.”

When was the last time that you had this thought? Every day, we make choices based on the idea that joy can be bought and that more money makes everything better. We take the new job with the extra hour in traffic because it pays more. We put a coat on credit because it’s designer. We buy the big house because it has a yard for our future kids and a kitchen island that’s “an entertainer’s dream.”

To be fair, scientifically speaking, when we see something we want, a new pair of shoes or a gadget, we do feel joy; it triggers a patch of tissue in the brain, the nucleus accumbens, the so-called sex and money area. It gets activated when humans receive a reward, whether drugs, money or food. Then when we buy something, we get a delicious burst of dopamine in the brain.

That sounds sexy and yummy and all, but the euphoria doesn’t last. Then we just need more stuff. All that crap we buy loses its lustre. When the novelty wears off and the shopping high from the endorphin and dopamine dump dissipates, we’re left with a void and possibly regret.

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Tax tips to kickstart 2019 for every age group, from teens to seniors

All the frugality in the world won't let this millennial retire at 45

“Why did I spend money on this?!?” we ask. Because I need it. Because I deserve it. Because I had a rough day. Because I have no willpower. Because it was on sale. Because it’s a habit. Because it was a whim, a knee-jerk reaction. But when you get down to it? Because I want to be happy.

So, what do we actually need to be happy? Let’s break down our thoughts on the subject and rebuild. This is me swinging on a wrecking ball (fully clothed) to help.

The magic number

We all need a certain amount of money to be happy. But how much?

For those of us who are on the verge of losing our homes, who fret about feeding our children, who cringe when the phone rings because debt collectors may be calling, without question, more money will make us happier. But for the rest of us, before connecting cash with joy, we need to talk about what we mean by “happy.”

Scientists in neuroeconomics (the study of how we make economic decisions) break happiness into two types:

1. Life satisfaction: an evaluation of your well-being as a whole (the kind of happy where you’re pleased with life in general). 2. Day-to-day mood: the highs and lows; the joy, stress, sadness, anger and affection that you experience from one moment to the next — how you feel today, how you felt yesterday. (The kind of happy that most of us relate to — the right now happiness.)

With life satisfaction, the richer people got, the more satisfied they were with their lives. In worldwide studies, people in richer countries reported higher life satisfaction than those in poorer countries. (We should also consider that wealthier countries are more politically stable, more peaceful and less oppressive — which affects well-being.) But according to a 2018 Purdue University study, there was a limit: $95,000 U.S. (pre-tax, per single-family household). Above that, more money didn’t mean that you were more satisfied. With day-to-day happiness, the threshold is $60,000 to $75,000 per household, according to various studies. The 2018 study showed that after these salaries are met, life satisfaction and day-to-day happiness actually slightly decrease with more money.

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What the what?

Well, apparently, when all of our basic needs are met, we become driven by other desires such as chasing after more material stuff and comparing ourselves to others, which make us unhappy. Also, high incomes can come with high demands (more working hours, more stress and less time with family and for leisure).

This doesn’t mean that we should all go out and try to make exactly $75,000 a year — our so-called feel-good financial sweet spot. The studies are averages, and we all need different things to be happy. But all of us find joy in some simple things — kisses, laughter, getting ID’d over the age of 25.

Marketing professor Hal Hershfield once told me, “Even if I have an amazing car in my driveway, a huge house and a big fat income, that doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll be happier on a day-by-day basis, because the types of things that influence happiness are who I interact with, how I spend my time and the things that I do.”

Think of some of your happiest times in the past week. Were you spending it with people? Were you taking time to enjoy an activity, going for a run or catching up with a good friend? Would a wad of cash have made those moments that much better?

Probably not. If you answered “yes” to the latter question, how much more do you need to be happy? Read on.

Your magic number is probably wrong

Let’s do an exercise together.

How happy are you on a scale of one to ten?

Now think about how much money you have in the bank, your salary. How much more money would you need to be a perfect 10?

Michael Norton, who teaches at Harvard Business School and co-authored Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending, surveyed average-income earners and high-net-worth Britons (with a net worth of more than $1 million), and he asked them those questions. “Everybody said two to three times as much money,” Norton told me.

“Why is that a problem?” I asked, estimating the same for myself.

“That’s a problem because people at $1 million said, ‘If I had $3 million, I’d be a perfect 10. Except that people who had $3 million said, ‘If I had $9 million, I’d be a perfect 10.’”

Basically, happiness is on a sliding scale. Think about how much this sucks. No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions. When you find the gold at the end of the rainbow, the pot is just too damn small, and then you’re off again, chasing more rainbows.

No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions.

It’s like a curse really. It also takes the fun out of my childhood dream of winning a million-dollar lottery. That was the very first fantasy I ever had: winning a jackpot and marrying one of the New Kids on the Block (anyone but Danny). I’d have fancy clothes and we’d eat at Red Lobster every weekend. (Still my idea of a hot date today.)

But despite what we may think, winning the lottery doesn’t buy you a one-way ticket to Euphoria Town. Take this famous study from 1978 where researchers asked two very different groups about their happiness: recent Illinois State Lottery winners who scored $50,000 to $1 million and recent victims of catastrophic accidents who were now paraplegic or quadriplegic. They asked the lottery winners and the accident victims to rate how happy they were at that stage of their lives, how happy they were before the life-altering event and how happy they expected to be in a few years. They asked them to rate how pleasant they found simple activities (talking with a friend, watching TV, eating breakfast, buying clothes, getting a compliment, etc.).

Seriously? Who’s happier, the person cruising in the wheelchair or in the Lamborghini?

Yes, the lottery winners were happier in the moment. The winners reported feeling more present happiness. But the people with disabilities rated their future happiness higher. They also enjoyed the simple things in life more: they had more appreciation for the mundane pleasures of things such as hearing a joke or reading a magazine. Actually, research shows a link between high income and a reduced ability to savour small pleasures. Experts blame it on hedonic adaptation — our tendency to just get used to whatever we have. Even a dramatic life improvement eventually becomes the new normal. You don’t smell the roses because they’re everywhere, any time of the day. And research has shown that our inner thermostats are set some-where between happiness and sadness: they can rise and fall depending on circumstance, but they generally return to that baseline. So, if you were a miserable moaner before hitting the jackpot, you’ll likely just be a rich miserable moaner.

In another real-life example, Markus Persson, who created Minecraft and sold it to Microsoft for $2.5 billion in 2014, reportedly bought a $70-million mansion, complete with a candy wall, vodka and tequila bars, designer fire extinguishers (because safety first, fashion second) and 15 bathrooms equipped with $5,000 remote-control operated toilets with air deodorizers and heated seats. But in 2015, he tweeted, “Hanging out in Ibiza with a bunch of friends and partying with famous people, able to do whatever I want, and I’ve never felt more isolated.” In another tweet, he said, “The problem with getting everything is you run out of reasons to keep trying, and human interaction becomes impossible due to imbalance.”

Now this could be super depressing to you. For me, it’s reassuring. It tells me that no single event or any material thing or external factor ultimately defines my happiness. Human beings are adaptable. A million dollars or a misfortune, over time, can become the new normal. Sure, with money, you’ll enjoy stylishly fighting fire with your Louis Vuitton extinguisher, but the riches may also make old pleasures seem less enjoyable.

So remember, there’s a better use of your money than playing the lottery. The odds of winning the Powerball jackpot prize are 1 in 292 million — and odds are that more money won’t guarantee that your days will be happier anyway.

Your happy money to-do list

If you find yourself thinking, “If I only had (insert anything), I’d be happy,” challenge it. Ask your partner or co-worker or friend to poke you (lovingly) if they ever hear you say that phrase. It’ll be like that awful baby shower game where you can’t say “baby” — but for your life.

If you’re relying on something (or someone) to make you happy, you’re wasting your time and energy. If affirmations are your jam, write this down and stick it somewhere: “I control my own happiness.”

Name three big things that make you happy regardless of money (good health or a loving partner). Now name three very specific things (sleeping in on the weekend, your jam on repeat). Repeat the exercise every time you feel crappy about your financial situation — or any situation.

Stop playing the lottery. Now. Next time you want to play the lottery, buy someone a coffee or put the money into a donation box instead for a guaranteed happiness payoff.

Money talks

If you think more money would make you happier, how much more?

How would your life be better with more money?

Think of a time when you made less money. Were you unhappier then? How much?

Think of some of your happiest moments from the last week. Would more money have made those moments better?

Excerpted and adapted from Happy Go Money by Melissa Leong. © 2019 by Melissa Leong. All rights reserved. Published by ECW Press Ltd. http://www.ecwpress.com

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it? published first on https://worldwideinvestforum.tumblr.com/

[bythepowerof4]

clea and nick and a very confusing two day argument @nickatnightwalker

[during daisy’s 420 dash shenanigans]

bythepowerof4nnnno dont encourage her this is bad

nickatnightwalkerim encouraging her to be distracted byh being queen of something clea

bythepowerof4noooooo i dont think its gonna work like that shell just try harder

or maybe not i dontt fucking know i dont know anything

nickatnightwalkersame my guy but it was a chance i was willing to take on behalf of all of us

bythepowerof4ok sure great fingers crossed whatEVER

we are all sooo super grateful

nickatnightwalkeroh this is worse

bythepowerof4that wasnnt even a goov fucking burn

bythepowerof4that was so LAME and she thinks she s so SMART and i hate her

and i dont wanna talk about it actually how are you

nickatnightwalkeri am

dying

bythepowerof4Great

nickatnightwalkeri would have gray hair by now if it were possible for me to have melanin

bythepowerof4youre not helping though!!!!! uoure engaging!!!!!

noo ok not my business

this is meant to be chill i want to be chill

nickatnightwalkerjus wait till the bowl goes around again

nickatnightwalkeri was trying to distract her you kmnow thats the only way to stop the daisymobile

bythepowerof4thats not fair you know thats not fair

nickatnightwalkerwhat waiting for the bowl or the daisymobile

bythepowerof4Both duh

nickatnightwalkeryes i know, and, also unfair that this is happening on 420 day or our lord and savior snoop

bythepowerof4its not fair that we have to deal with this whether it happens or not wee could just like walk away from the weird passive aggressive blogging ccrcle right now if we so chose

yeah????

because this isnt FUN nickolas it is not

nickatnightwalkeri personally am having a loads of fun messing with ines

you have to dea l with everything when it happens so this is just a thign

bythepowerof4oh cool great youre just as bad fantastic news

nickatnightwalkerok i did no t and have not publicly read anybody out yet to date

i only do that privatley and only when it suits me

bythepowerof4:/

://////

bythepowerof4look at u ur being a dick right niw!!!!

nickatnightwalkeroh what to ines

im screwing with her

shes trying to fight me

bythepowerof4because this is soo the best way to deal with that sort of situation

nickatnightwalkerits just funny idk why shes getting all snaked out of shape

bythepowerof4"hot" you dick????

Youre both being gross now stop it!!!

nickatnightwalkera joke

a JOKE

shes a lesiabn

also just like

no

bythepowerof4its not FUNNY nick

neither of you are funny its weird and annoying and embarrassing

nickatnightwalkershe wants ot punch me bc i sias d bite me

i dondt really feel like imobligagated to take her seriously anymore

besides shes a shit so no t only is it funny to watch her blow a gasket over the same google image snatched pic i also like pissing her off

bythepowerof4u arent obligated to fight w her either but ur doing that,, a lot

idk

Im not making sense

nickatnightwalkerthis is brely a fight

[nothing until nick sends the photo]

bythepowerof4im not mad at you and im not mad at her so can you not tag team revenge for once in your fucking life

we're having an almost genuine conversation for once without you interjecting to make fun of me and pretend play matchmaker for shits and giggles so can you please, please cut it out

nickatnightwalkerim not making fun of you

nickatnightwalkerif i was making fun of you itd be a lot meaner

you should be flattered i even considereed encourragign you to go for daisy

[next day]

bythepowerof4hey!! how are you feeling haha, is ur hair still going grey

bythepowerof4im not trying to act like nothing is bad btw i just wanted to start it off nice sorry :/

nickatnightwalkermy hair's moved past being gray and now it's black, so im inadvertently copying misha again

bythepowerof4lmao this is some goth power play shit love it

nickatnightwalkerwhite haired twink is out 2008 gerard way is in

bythepowerof4as it should be!! do you need eyeliner like i don't have any but it would really make the Look

nickatnightwalkerwhy would i need that when i have dry erase markers to just apply liberally to my face

bythepowerof4so resourceful?? pinterest diy that shit

bythepowerof4we can raid the art rooms, get some glue while we're at it and cut a big chunk out of your hair gel budget

nickatnightwalkerdanger with that is potentially overgluing and making it fragile and breakable like glass

bythepowerof4glass bones and paper skin and glass hair also. got it

i mean youre pretty protective of it already i doubt anyone would notice the difference!!

nickatnightwalkerevery morning i break my legs getting out of bed

bythepowerof4do your heart attacks put you to sleep bc i know that feeling

nickatnightwalkeryeah thats why i sleep like four separate times a day

bythepowerof4and i thought that was just a #relateableteen thing

bythepowerof4so not to be weird but is this like. Chilly lackluster banter or are you actually not mad at me

nickatnightwalkerno im pissed

bythepowerof4ok

can i ask why

nickatnightwalkeri mean well first ya came at me for fucking with you which

like i said

i do but it's obvious

then you were a shit to daisy

so

thats that

bythepowerof4iiii mean. you said you wouldnt do that anymore. and then you did. i was just upset

and im sorry about daisy, i told her that too

bythepowerof4like really sorry!!

i just think its weird that someone can say, threaten to kill her and call her a bitch all the time

and youll date him

but i cant get a little upset when we're all high and im having a super stressful few days!!

nickatnightwalkerdo what anymore

bythepowerof4fuck with me

about her

nickatnightwalkerim not

i havent been

bythepowerof4you did though

bythepowerof4like what else was that picture

nickatnightwalkeryou said she was weird and creepy and i sent a picture of her being cute and sweet

bythepowerof4i said she was ACTING weird and creepy which objectively is an accurate description for someone talking about throbbing tentacle dicks and using the word "quivering" in relation to the nether regions of the girl they beat up for fun

but like, what do i know

i dont think shes weird and creepy and thats not what that photo was about im not an idiot

nickatnightwalkerlisten i frankly think everyone needs to reserve their judgment on the moire and daisy situation because it's clearly very complex and beyond the comprehension of mortal men and none of our fucking business to judge one way or another and, yknow, imho, moire has gills and misha smells like magic and youre 4d so maybe also reserve your fucking judgment on who's weird around here anyway

bythepowerof4i know thats why i apologized

nickatnightwalkershe can say shit like that and still be cute and sweet

bythepowerof4but like i said, high and upset and still getting used to this, so u can forgive me for one slip up surely

nickatnightwalkershe contains motherfucking multitudes

bythepowerof4thats not what you were saying though!! you didnt say that

you sent me a picture trying to make me jealous or something, just like she was saying, because obviously i cant have a private conversation with either one of you

nickatnightwalkerif youre jealous thats your problem

bythepowerof4im NOT

you both keep acting like i am thats not fair!!!

nickatnightwalkeri wasnt youre the one who's fixated on it

dont believe i ever said the j word

bythepowerof4i didnt either!! she did!!!

im not fixated on anything i just want to be able to talk to you without you making it about her all the time

nickatnightwalkerweve occasionally talked about more than daisy im p sure

bythepowerof4:/ you know what i meant

nickatnightwalkerwell this IS about her whether you think im continually screwing with you in some single minded attempt to torment you or not

and im not a fan of someone who says theyre her friend telling her shit like that

bythepowerof4i said SORRY it happens ok!!! i feel really awful about it why do you think i was so upset yesterday?

nickatnightwalkeri dont know dude i was baked

bythepowerof4i didnt know that specific thing upset her so much bc no one gave me a rule book for this shit and im never gonna do it again

nickatnightwalkerok cool

im also deciding rightnow this second i dont care if you believe why i sent the picture or not because youre so dead set on me trying to fuck with you ill never change your mind

and for the record

damians never called her a bitch again

nickatnightwalkerand if he tried to kill her, id be more concerned about scraping enough of him up off the sidewalk to fill a bucket

bythepowerof4youre not even gonna try to understand why i might think that

like i could tell you if u gave enough of a shit to listen yeah

nickatnightwalkeris poor self esteem and daisys difficulty with dropping her persona not the right answer

bythepowerof4not quite but thhanks

for that

nickatnightwalkerthats usually what it is

bythepowerof4ok just. Listen for a sec without jumping in to insult me yeah

bythepowerof4the two of you like, obviously tell each other everything. like u straight up reference shit shes obviously told u n vice versa

and that makes it weird cause it feels like im never talking to just you and thats why its weird when u bring her up bc its like, why wouldnt u just tell her whatever i say!!!

bythepowerof4and u keep saying i have a shot w her and telling me how to impress her when i just wanted to brag about winning chicken it didnt have to be a THING u know???

bythepowerof4but like!!! if ur saying that then she knows and it makes it weird!!! like you do that even when you said youd stop and then she accuses me of being jealous of moire and then you immediately send that picture and u can see how i might think it was a fucking team effort

yeah?????

bythepowerof4its weird and intimidating and im not even friends with her i was obviously fooling myself about that but i thought i was friends with you

like not youtwo as a unit or whatever fake setting me up

ok im done but that was stupid so whatever

nickatnightwalkerwell like 1. i dont tell her everything

i know hard concept but just because we talk about a lot of shit which is, yknow, what one does with friends, it doesnt mean we talk about everything

nickatnightwalkerfor instance: didnt know she said you were jealous of moire

bythepowerof4ok

bythepowerof4i believe you im obviously not that big a deal for u guys to bother talking abt me fine

but u can at least see how i might think that given ur whole thing is acting like ur joined at the hip and ganging up on ppl

u know

nickatnightwalkerwait do you want us to talk about you or not clea

nickatnightwalkershe was upset so she told me, i was pissed so i gave you photographic evidence

of the contrary imean

if i know everything about her then when i say youve got a shot i really think im in the best position to be calling that

bythepowerof4thats the problem!! Bc i clearly dont have a shot we dont even talk that much bc i dont even know how to talk to her and that makes it seem like ur pulling it out of ur ass!

nickatnightwalkereither i know everything about her or i dont make up your mind truong

bythepowerof4youre missing the point ok

nickatnightwalkerif the point isnt me giving you the run around to fuck with you not sure what the point is then

bythepowerof4oh my god

nickatnightwalkeris that not literally what you just said

bythepowerof4that is youre just getting bogged down in dumb shit im saying!!

nickatnightwalkeror dyou have your planes in a knot over us telling each other things like, information, like, sharing information about our lives

bythepowerof4stop that i dont give a shit about how the two of you act i just want you to get that its scary!! and it makes it hard for me and you expect me to be so good at this that the second i fuck up youre coming at methis hard

nickatnightwalkerof course i am shes my best friend and youre her friend so it's way worse than some rando ragging on her

bythepowerof4youre MY friend youre like my best friend here because im a fucking mess and youre getting personal about this and its upsetting me it doesnt have to be this intense???

nickatnightwalkerhurting daisy is always gonna be personal clea

nickatnightwalkerand i get you apologized and thats cool and that could be that but to the best of my fucking understanding im not giving you false hope and tbqh honestly, to be honest, actually, youre a decent fucking person and i have a strong preference that daisy go on coffee dates with someone whos not gonna knock her teeth out of her fucking head

bythepowerof4youre that invested and youve never said a single thing to her about it??

do you see how i might come to doubt that

nickatnightwalkeryeah and what the fuck would i say sorry but your weird hate crush kinda gives me the heebs have you ever considered not acting on that and trying to be relatively normal and healthy instead

bythepowerof4so what i have to do everything

nickatnightwalkeridk if youve noticed this but she doesnt really know what shes doing a lot of the time when shes talking to people so you know how i was talking about effort:: reward? thats where that comes in

bythepowerof4thats not fair

you could have just told her that thing you just said instead of pinning the work on other people without even telling them

nickatnightwalkergenerally speaking i try not to reveal daisys weaknesses to new acquaintances

bythepowerof4thats still not fair

do u even like me or are you seriously just trying to set her up with the least murderous person here

nickatnightwalkerif i didnt like you i wouldnt care if you were the least murderous person here

besides i dont get how you think us talking to each other is weird but you expect me to run interference in every single one of her friendships like, hey, just a heads up, shes got trouble finding the off button on the snarky attitude

like hell wingmanning you is pretty much the limit of what i can justify

bythepowerof4i dont expect you to do anything ive told you plenty of times that that shouldnt be your job

youre the one whos apparently been trying to invent a friendship where there isnt one?? forgive me for feeling kind of skeeved

nickatnightwalkeri was under the impression that you WERE friends

not sure when you stopped being friends actually

i KNOW shes doing her best to be less

bad

around you

bythepowerof4:/

nickatnightwalkerwhat

bythepowerof4i didnt wanna say "relationship" tbh bc there definitely isnt one of those

nickatnightwalkeroh haha relatable but look

i saw something good happening there with regards to daisy makin a human connection and i was trying my motherfucking utmost to encourage it

bythepowerof4ok but. its not a genuine human connection if youre there right

thats not very organic its just uncomfortable and confusing

i appreciate your help i guess but it was clearly more for her benefit than mine and that doesnt feel great?

nickatnightwalkerim not like lurking behind coffee machines im not actually THERE

and of course it's more for her benefit i didnt even know you

bythepowerof4i mean the second it went south you were, there, actually,

oh wow

thanks

nickatnightwalkerman youre not gonna pick me over like, your brother or something i dont see how this is shocking

besides

daisys

a good person to be friends with

bythepowerof4i mean sure but im still a bit caught up in you picking me out of a lineup like oh theyll do!!

nickatnightwalkerwhat line up

she likes you

bythepowerof4ok this part for once is not about her

well a little bit but listen

i thought we were friends because you thought i was nice and wanted to be

aka nothing to do with daisy

nickatnightwalkerwell like

yeah

that kinda helped your case though i guess

bythepowerof4no im sorry but that makes it weird

bythepowerof4that you befriended me for her sake and the second i pissed her off you trashed me for it like all im good for is bringing out the good in her

thats stupid??

nickatnightwalkeroh my god you have terrible reading comprehension

step 1.  we got to be friends

bythepowerof4ok we're back at insilts great!!!

nickatnightwalkershhh just shhh for like a second im breaking itdown alright

step 1. we got to be friends

step 2. you and daisy are also sort of friendsish

step 3. i encourage this shit because shes trying and youre pretty alright

step 4.  youre yelling at me for leading you on and befriending you to like lure you to daisy or some shit because i apparently just psychically knew you were ok

dont remember if we started talking because you were already talking to daisy so i figure that says something

bythepowerof4thats not what you just said but fine

bythepowerof4if im so wrong about all of this then im sorry for misunderstanding

nickatnightwalkerno it is what i just said

being friends with me first helped your case re me backing you up since i knew you werent a dick

bythepowerof4fine!!! ok i get it i just apologized

i cant help not getting stuff sometimes i figure u would get that being friends with daisy and all

but youre just saying all thise mean shit to upset me and not even feeling bad about it apparently

nickatnightwalkerlisten i really hand to god dont know what things youre talking about right now

doing it for daisy over you?  like

i knew you enough to know youre alright but daisy is daisy

bythepowerof4ok well yesterday, for one, with the "you should be flattered" bullshit

bythepowerof4and u were fucked so i would forgive that in a second if u bothered apologizing

or maybe the picture, which like, whatever your intentions were clearly was pretty hurtful

or anything about low self esteem, treating me like a melodramatic idiot,

any of that rally

nickatnightwalkerim gonna address these in order

bythepowerof4unless ur adress contains a sorry i dont care

ive heard ur excuses and thats great but thats not how this works

nickatnightwalkerlike

nickatnightwalkerugh jesus cut me some slack im not exactly a social guru here either im sorry about the low self esteem comment that was genuinely not meant to be douchy and neither was the picture even though i sent it because i was pissed

that was more of a look youre wrong kinda thing but i get how with daisy saying you were jealous that looks way harsher than i thought it was so im sorry about that

bythepowerof4even in context of like, just our previous convos i think that seems pretty harsh but yeah

thanks

i appreciate it for real

nickatnightwalkerand like i cant in good faith apologize for the you should be flattered shit because regardless of the situation daisy is daisy and in the interest of transparency im never gonna think anyones good enough for her but like i said she was willing to make an effort for you and i knew you were ok so

bythepowerof4oh my god

nickatnightwalkerwhat i honestly dont get why youre so shocked i prioritize daisy

bythepowerof4im not but you dont,, need to, for one

u know you didnt eed to compare us at all

and no offence but if youre trying to convince me you like me as a person and not just bc im convenient

saying "youre ok" as often as possible is NOT reassuring

nickatnightwalkeroh what

well first obviously i had to since you were getting kinda messed up over me doing thing for her not you and second of all i dont mean Ah Yes, You'll Do..... i mean youre ok

like

bythepowerof4that hadnt happened yet u just brought it up out of nowhere

nickatnightwalkernot bad

bythepowerof4it was douchey

nickatnightwalkerno you

you said it

like

ill scroll back if i have to but you said me doing it all for her felt bad

bythepowerof4yeah and it does fyi but u pulled that "you dont deserve her" crap last fucking night

if youre gonna continue a fight u started high at least read the backlogs dude

its clearly on ur mind if u brought it ip for no reason

nickatnightwalkerit wasnt for no reason it was because she was upset you called her weird and crazy

i didnt pull this shit from the void

bythepowerof4" you were getting kinda messed up over me doing thing for her not you" this hadnt happened yet thats all im saying

u cant even keep your excuses straight

i didnt compare us and you decided to and that understandably made me feel like shit

nickatnightwalkerwell goddamn you pulled the receipts it's certainly not like i couldnt have misunderstood what particular thing you were referring to

bythepowerof4i only did that bc u tried to make it about something else!! i get why u were mad at me but youre trying to make me look dumb its not fair!!

nickatnightwalkerim not trying to make you look like anything believe it or not

sometimes i too am capable of misunderstandings

bythepowerof4then why dont you ever say sorry for them

ive messed up like a dozen times in this convo alone and i said "sorry i misunderstood" ur just

id unno its going in circles and its dumb bc i just want you to not be mad at me

nickatnightwalkerbecause im too busy trying to tell you im not framing you to look like a tool

bythepowerof4and i said i believed you

but youre acting like im an idiot for thinking it at all

nickatnightwalkerdude im not

like i dont know what im doing thats making you think that but im sorry?

bythepowerof4i told you!! over and over!! and you kept making it into something else!!

literally read what u just said and tell me it wouldnt make u feel like an idiot

nickatnightwalkerwhatever sorry i compared you and said you should be flattered

bythepowerof4whatever

sorry agan for being a dick to you last night, bc i admit i was, and to daisy but ill take that one to her bc its like, Our Business

whatevers dont count and im tired so, till next time i guess

nickatnightwalker i said it after you upset her but before you apologized and pretty much would feel that way if donald glover himself came to her door

[pinksweatergettingbetter]

“at least the jury is still out on that one, so to speak”

so to speak is right, phoenix :T

-

“I WANTED TO KILL YOU. WAAHHHH”

ok rayfa. easy there.

-

aw. the dad is so strong that he cant even bear to see the murder brat sad. 

hdgdhfgh im gonna die he’s trying to cheer her up by acting like the bad guy

at the risk of sounding tumblry, phoenix wright is a cinnamon roll, to pure or whatever 

-

...is this kooraheen’s ‘happy people’?

.....i don't like it

-

ahlbi doesn’t get to be an assistant but he does get to carry all my unwanted crap!

-

“first the high priest, and then his disciple! maya fey will pay for this!”

ah yes, she’ll pay for killing off people we recently proved to be dangerous insurgents. 

-

WHOA OK GRAPHIC 

-

well ok there’s no possible way Maya could have killed him that night.

“they think she came down the stairs and stabbed him” yes in front of 200 praying people. no, they weren't looking up but probably the sound of a knife being driven into flesh and also footsteps may have alerted them???

-

rayfa wants to know how a time of death is determined, not for real... but because she wants to know what the idiot groundlings believe ?

either she’s an idiot and she doesn’t realize its completely legitimate, or the writers are still trying to make fun of religion via the “science and religion don't mix” joke which quite frankly is getting REALLY TIRESOME

-

ok... well I'm not scientific expert but doesn’t the body eventually reach a steady temperature? how could you determine how long the body took to cool down if it was cooled down for a long enough period of time? also, it was really cold on that mountain. 

something tells me this will be useful later.

-

again capcom, pointing out how unlikely your plot is doesnt make it better. it makes it worse.

-

“I will curse you and your disciples for eight generations!”

I'm pretty sure apollo and the series has already been cursed, mrs. inmee.

-

every time she kisses his picture i cry 

-

Zehlot arrived at the same time as Maya, but Mrs. Inmee is more inclined to believe that Maya is a murderer? I mean yes she supposedly killed off the other two, but jeez. Talk about favouritism. 

-

they let us check out the trash again... simply for a joke about phoenix digging through trash. I'm not sure how to feel about this.

-

katchu-dehmal, eh? Pokémon gonna sue 

-

hey um mrs. inmee

you've got a little something on your wrist...............

-

“Puhray always prayed a lot”

the terrible naming convention just makes that sound incredibly stupid

-

“She may say these terrible things, but it was just the way she was raised, I guess”

um... a lesson in tolerance i guess

-

“I didn’t know him very well”

you didnt know the guy you stayed with for two years?? man i guess Puhray really did pray the most.

-

i love that theyre mentioning ramen and burgers

and also that phoenix is offering to buy for maya

its the little things that make this game liveable 

-

everybody loves steel samurai!!!

-

“Whooops... its coming undone... WHOA!”

yes, it is indeed a very sexy picture. nice legs.

-

“tentacled hag frog”

what is this, last airbender??

-

“a spirit’s memory is cut off at the moment of death”

well of course. that’s how Mia was able to come to court knowing what was going on and being able to set phoenix on the right direction!

genius retcon there, guys. I guess that’s why Mia doesn’t make a comeback in this game :/

-

“helped neighbouring countries seek counsel”

actually thats an interesting callback to the original games where they state that before DL-6, Misty and Kurain village were famous for helping out people in high places. this i do not mind so much.

... though i doubt this would prevent you being invaded, Kooraheen. Also considering she mentions ‘keeping their unique culture’ as an aside to that fact, and the fact that a lot of this fictional country is based off of Tibet... Ouch.

-

“ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS!!!”

hey, there’s that ol’ Khumerican spirit!

-

“so the queen can perform the dance of devotion? that’d be a sight to see”

Phoenix stop imaging the queen in a mini skirt.

-

“theres no reason to panic, the police are on his trail”

the police that let him run on foot out of a crowded courtroom. 

id say you can panic now.

-

in exchange for his visual youthfulness, phoenix has physically aged considerably.

meanwhile, Gregory Edgeworth was rocking major wrinkles at 35 and he was fit as a fiddle.

Oh Capcom, when will your beauty-based cruelty end??

-

are we legit going to search for Datz

-

ok now i rly wanna hear what a Warb’aad sounds like.

-

further proof that phoenix is a huge carnivore. i am pleased.

-

boy kooraheen isn't very accessible is it. stairs everywhere

-

i love that no matter where he is, phoenix is always buying food for children.

-

alright enough fun stuff. into the absurdly spacious sewer we go!

-

I'm legitimately laughing my ass off why is it so funny that Ahlbi didn’t know his dog could track scents????

-

AAA WE’RE IN

WE’RE IN A FUCKIN SEWER

IM YELLIN

-

...oh my god no... i stg... dont you dare 

OH GOD 

OHHH GOD 

fuck....

i dont know who’s stupider: the rebels or the police

-

he... can eat... an entire apple... that is half the size of his face... in one bite.

this, truly, is a man to be feared

ranger hobo, your new nickname is Potential Vore Machine

-

>phoenix likes apples

further proof he is a good boy

-

wow thats even worse

i thought they’d just put their base in the sewers, but no; their base is an OLD LAW OFFICE AKA THE FIRST PLACE YOU’D LOOK FOR LAWYER REBELS

again, not sure who’s stupider: the rebels, or the police?

-

“public enemy #1 is a lawyer? didnt see that coming”

clearly you expect more from this game, phoenix

-

“Im gonna sell out my best friend!”

>doubt

-

OH OK NEVER LOOK SURPRISED AGAIN CLOSE YOUR VORE MOUTH JESUS CHRIST

-

if he wasnt a rebel anymore he'd have kicked your ass since youre a lawyer, phoenix. its not that hard to put together that he’s lying. ...for some reason. 

-

LAME. YOU cant show him your badge??? bullshit.

-

fucking christ even when he whistles his mouth is larger than it should be. 

-

he really is rebel!larry isn’t he

-

so Dhurke has a power glare, huh? 

GLARE OFF WITH EDGEWORTH, GLARE OFF WITH EDGEWORTH, GLARE OFF WITH EDGEWORTH

-

“is this a law book? the dragon’s mark has been branded onto the cover...”

pfffttt edgy 

-

hmm. must be a new law-book if the defence culpability act is in it, since if i remember correctly that law was only recently introduced.

-

i love that Dhurke’s shit is just everywhere in this stupid house

-

...no way is he actually doing to

i...

like

i can’t even say punk’d. Phoenix, why would you try on a jacket that once belonged to a rebel leader while inside a rebel base that you’re not even sure is friendly to you? 

like i 

sense of preservation just goes out the window at the idea of looking cool?? actually to be fair that kind of makes sense for Phoenix so 

phoenix you should take it home and get it dry-cleaned.

-

“hmm this is an old photo...” says phoenix looking at a photo that’s as bright and shiny as the day it was taken. also he correctly guesses that it was taken 20 years ago based on... what evidence??

actually if he actually acknowledged that thats OBVIOUSLY APOLLO THERE then he’d have an actual metric to go by but NOPE! just bullshit magic deductions!

-

yeah or Nahyuta’s pulling a long game and you assholes are too impatient 

i cant believe I'm defending sadmad :/

-

WAIT A SECOND. ARE YOU TELLING ME....... THAT KID WHO LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE APOLLO....... IS APOLLO?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?

-

somehow Datz carried Phoenix through a tiny trapdoor and into this room huh

-

yay psyche locks!

-

YES!!!! YEEEEES!!! I GOT TO PRESENT MY BADGE

Soj... you may not be... completely horrible.

-

yeah phoenix, he was going to stab you if he thought you were on the side of the Queen

feel even stupider about that jacket now?

-

“Keera was working with the government the whole time?!”

well i mean what other motivation would they have? even if they were doing it for religious reasons that still lines up with the government’s intentions. 

this whole thing has a blacklisting smell on it too.

-

“a lawyer killed the queen, so the public turned against lawyers”

if that was how things worked, America would loath actors. 

-

“why does he have to jump like that before running off”

cause he’s a cartoon character 

-

“Well I guess we’re friends now”

oh phoenix 

my lonely baby

-

also where the fuck is Shah’do? That dog is a better policeman than every official in Kooraheen.

and i love that nobody notices people entering and exiting a sewer in broad daylight.  

-

well that was exactly where i thought it was

-

WOW GOOD GOING PHOENIX YOU DUMBFUCK

“HURRRHH I THINK ILL GO FIDN TH  SOOPER SECRET REBEL BASE WITH THE FUCKING PRINCESS IN-TOW. GENIUS!!!!”

OH YES, AND THEN TELL HER EXACTLY WHAT IT IS. AND THEN LET HER COME INSIDE WITH YOU WITHOUT THE INTENT TO SHUT HER UP

BRILLIANT!!

PHOENIX WRIGHT, TRULY THE REBEL’S GREATEST ALLY.

-

ohhhhHHHHHhhhh

well well well well well well

this is interesting

-

“I think I’ll take a picture of this super secret rebel base”

hhhnnngghhhh

-

search every nook and cranny eh

-

“if the rebellion ever happens, i hope its bloodless”

while that’s sweet of you phoenix, you can count on it now, sincE YOU’VE REVEALED THE SOURCE OF THEIR WEAPONRY TO THE ENEMY

-

“What’s this? A bloodstain?”

Hope it is not Chris’ bloodstain...

-

CURSED NOISE

CURSED NOISE

TURN IT OFF!!!

-

this is where capcom hides characters they don’t like

Klavier is somehwere in this room....... festering

-

well we’ve come to the end of another investigation 

tbh I'm starting to get into the storyline, though it still doesn’t feel like an Ace Attorney game

it’s more like... it’s like someone took their Ace Attorney AU and made an entire game about it. It’s got some cool points to it, but all in all, it just doesn’t... fit, I guess?

Oh well. onto trial #2 and saving Maya’s butt once again

[internetdetectives]

8/31/19 - Chat with Moonman and GHOSTBABEL

moonman31 12:04 PM: ((A screenshot of a news article reporting that hurricane Helena is no longer headed towards Moonman’s location is posted))

moonman31 12:04 PM: "damn y'all”

Slinky stinks 12:05 PM: "is that good or bad”

moonman31 12:05 PM: "it moved away”

Jos 12:05 PM: "Yes,”

Slinky stinks 12:05 PM: "dont tell me the goddamn ritual worked on the AO timeline too lol”

moonman31 12:05 PM: "what”

Slinky stinks 12:06 PM: "its kinda hard to explain without breaking the 4th wall a little so lets leave it there”

moonman31 12:06 PM: "Y'all fuckin with magic again huh”

Jos 12:06 PM: "

we did a little ritual to the "sun", the counter of luna, as a joke to move the huricane away, and it worked? lol”

Jos 12:06 PM: "Just kidding”

Jos 12:06 PM: "how it is going”

moonman31 12:07 PM: "I mean good now that I won't get eaten by a giant storm”

Slinky stinks 12:07 PM: "yeah are you good n stuff”

Slinky stinks 12:07 PM: “well, thats nice to hear i guess”

Jos 12:07 PM: "that might be the fetish of someone outthere on the internet”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "rule 34 my friend”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "huricane rule 34”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "imagine that actually exists”

Jos 12:08 PM: "well, seems like AO is pretty chill rn”

Jos 12:08 PM: "and jid is the same”

Slinky stinks 12:09 PM: "and the elegy didnt do that much of a thing apart of making moony see that thing (sorry again)”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "tl;dr a friend of ours performed a ritual as a joke to redirect the hurricane”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "Well”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "I dunno if he was joking, he got a few other friends to do it too”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "oh rigth”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "we also did it”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "so it kinda counts”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:10 PM: "sᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀs ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴇɴ, ᴛʜᴇ sᴜɴ's sᴏɴɢ?”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "nope”

Jos 12:10 PM: "Helios song*”

Jos 12:10 PM: "but with images”

Jos 12:10 PM: "lol”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "we invoked helios with something”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "yeah lol”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "imagine now we can use gods aswell lmao”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "that would be rad ngl”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:11 PM: "sᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜɴ's sᴏɴɢ ᴍᴀɴᴜᴀʟʟʏ? ᴏʀ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪᴅ, ᴇssᴇɴᴛɪᴀʟʟʏ. ᴠᴇʀʏ ᴘʀɪᴍɪᴛɪᴠɪsᴛ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜ.”

Slinky stinks 12:11 PM: "no, we didnt play any songs”

Slinky stinks 12:11 PM: "a friend did a kinda ritual and told us to draw a image so it would make more effect”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:12 PM: "ʏᴏᴜ ᴍɪss ᴍʏ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ. ᴇɪᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴀʏ ᴡᴇ'ʀᴇ ᴀꜰꜰᴇᴄᴛɪɴɢ ᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ sᴏʀᴛs ᴏꜰ ᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs sᴏ ᴛᴏ sᴘᴇᴀᴋ.”

Slinky stinks 12:12 PM: "oh”

Slinky stinks 12:12 PM: "i dont know how to read sorry”

Jos 12:12 PM: "pff, songs are for casuals, manual is better…”

Jos 12:12 PM: "yeah”

moonman31 12:13 PM: "fuckin casuals”

moonman31 12:13 PM: "git gud like my ID boys”

Slinky stinks 12:13 PM: "songs are for normies reeeeeeeee”

Slinky stinks 12:13 PM: "so aprantly now if we do a ritual it may also work? or wtf does this mean lol”

Jos 12:14 PM: "The song of time fucked up AO on oyur time, the magic can also move the storm on your universe so we can affect stuff from here”

Jos 12:14 PM: "the thing is why, maybe because tyler is there?”

Jos 12:14 PM: "he is there and therefore that universe was affected”

Jos 12:14 PM: "as this universe was affected when he used to be in this one”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "oh rigth”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "bc he is our link”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "ok it makes sense”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:15 PM: "ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴏɴᴅᴇʀ, ᴡʜᴏ ɪs ᴏᴜʀ ʟɪɴᴋ? ᴀʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴀʟʟ ʟɪɴᴋ?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:15 PM: "ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴊᴏᴋᴇs.”

Jos 12:16 PM: "probably your tyler”

moonman31 12:16 PM: "oof”

Slinky stinks 12:16 PM: "lol”

Jos 12:16 PM: "from your universe, or someone else”

moonman31 12:16 PM: "that's some deeplore humor”

Jos 12:16 PM: "Hiiija!”

Jos 12:16 PM: "pot break sounds”

Slinky stinks 12:16 PM: "GNHA!”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:17 PM: "ɪ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ.”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "can't really blame you lol”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "ok so”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "that is gud but”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "we are still kind of in a stalemate”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "plus now we have some new spooks about apparently so”

otherLiam 12:18 PM: "That’s true. Right now we’re sort of waiting on GB to get us into the subspace.”

Jos 12:18 PM: "I still wonder who is the AO with the alien mask”

otherLiam 12:18 PM: "As usual, we’re all dependent on his skills.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:18 PM: "ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ, ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴡ.”

Slinky stinks 12:18 PM: "yup”

otherLiam 12:19 PM: "Oh, awesome. Do you know how long it’ll take?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:19 PM: "ᴡᴇ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴏɴᴇ sᴍᴀʟʟ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇᴀʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇᴇᴅ.”

Slinky stinks 12:19 PM: "what problem…”

Jos 12:20 PM: "enemy eyes?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:20 PM: "ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ɪᴛ ʙᴇsᴛ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴇʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀs ᴏꜰ ɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪ'ᴍ sᴜʀᴇ ɪᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴀ ᴘᴀɴɪᴄ, ʙᴜᴛ ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ʀᴇᴀsᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴏʀʀʏ ᴀs ᴏꜰ ɴᴏᴡ.”

Slinky stinks 12:20 PM: "you lost the hat?”

otherLiam 12:20 PM: "well that’s unsettling”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:20 PM: "ɴᴏ.”

Slinky stinks 12:20 PM: "okay…”

otherLiam 12:20 PM: "but alright, handle your business. let us know if we can do anything to help.”

Slinky stinks 12:21 PM: "yup”

Slinky stinks 12:21 PM: “tho if its a very big problem you should tell us so we can solve it”

otherLiam 12:21 PM: "Is there anything we can do to prevent Nocta from doing whatever he did to Moonman to other people?”

Jos 12:22 PM: "I think the problem is telling us”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:22 PM: "ɪ ꜰᴇᴇʟ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏɴ. ʙ��ᴛ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴀssᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛɪɴᴜᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ꜰᴏʀᴡᴀʀᴅ. ɪɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴇɴᴅ ɪ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴛʀᴜsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ɪɴᴅɪᴠɪᴅᴜᴀʟ ᴏᴜʀ ꜰɪɴᴀʟ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢᴀɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘ's ᴛʀᴜsᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ɪꜰ ɪᴛ ɪs sʜᴀʀᴇᴅ ɪ'ᴍ ᴀꜰʀᴀɪᴅ ᴀ ʀᴏɢᴜᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴘᴜʟʟ ᴀɴ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ ᴅᴇᴛᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ꜰᴀᴍᴏᴜs sᴛᴜɴᴛ.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:22 PM: "ɪ'ᴍ ɴᴏᴛ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴀᴛ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅɪɴɢ sᴏ ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄʜᴏᴏsᴇ.”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "lol”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "idk feels like a troll to me”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "i mean at least as far as making yall choose”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "ummm”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "who tho”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:25 PM: "ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴛᴀʙ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ɪ'ᴍ ᴏɴ.”

otherLiam 12:25 PM: "Nah, it makes sense. I’d be worried about us doing a headass move too.”

Mr t series good 12:25 PM: "im not even on pornhub rn”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "ay i closed the tab 15 mins ago”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "dont @ me”

moonman31 12:26 PM: "i was about to say”

moonman31 12:26 PM: "i don't think he was talking to me”

otherLiam 12:29 PM: "give thr info to Jos.”

Jos 12:29 PM: "o/”

otherLiam 12:29 PM: "we voted”

moonman31 12:29 PM: ":open_mouth:”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:29 PM: "ᴀʟʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛʜᴇɴ.”

Slinky stinks 12:30 PM: "\o/”

Mr t series good 12:30 PM: “ok”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:32 PM: "ɪᴛ ɪs ᴅᴏɴᴇ. ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsᴇs.”

Slinky stinks 12:32 PM: "neat”

Jos 12:32 PM: "I know nothing tbh”

otherLiam 12:33 PM: "aight neat.”

moonman31 12:34 PM: "i don't really know what's going on tbh”

Slinky stinks 12:34 PM: "me neither”

Xenquility 12:34 PM: "No one has know what's been going on for the past four years”

Jos 12:34 PM: "I wish i knew”

Slinky stinks 12:34 PM: "well moonman how is that hurricane crisis going”

moonman31 12:34 PM: "same”

otherLiam 12:34 PM: "GB is being paranoid about our stupidity, that’s all.”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "i think he should be”

otherLiam 12:35 PM: "Rightly so, yeah.”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "lol”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "well, any news about my fuck up?”

otherLiam 12:36 PM: "What do you mean? Like, “has anyone seen Tenebris lately”?”

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: "yup”

moonman31 12:36 PM: ((A meme mocking the player Slinky is posted))

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: "just that”

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: “honestly, AO memes are better”

otherLiam 12:37 PM: "damn that’s cold”

otherLiam 12:37 PM: "and im not sure we’ll know the full extent of how bad you fucked up for a while.”

Slinky stinks 12:37 PM: "im gonna pull out the Alpha version of that meme”

moonman31 12:38 PM: "what”

Slinky stinks 12:38 PM: ((A meme mocking the player Slinky is posted))

moonman31 12:38 PM: "damn”

Xenquility 12:38 PM: "oh hey what a cool and original meme”

moonman31 12:38 PM: "tom and jerry is classic tho”

Slinky stinks 12:38 PM: "yeah tom and jerry is the best”

Xenquility 12:39 PM: "whoever made that must be extremely sexy”

Jos 12:39 PM: "ᛨᛆᛘᚾ”

Slinky stinks 12:39 PM: "jos with his runes s freaking me out”

Jos 12:39 PM: "ᛋᛚᛁᚾᚴᛦ᛫ ᛒᚮᚮᚮᚮ”

moonman31 12:39 PM: "damn cold xen”

moonman31 12:39 PM: "i saw that shit”

(...)

Xenquility 5:24 PM: "I'm still of the opinion none of that spellcasting stuff was canon”

ADULT_LINK 5:24 PM: "it does that”

Xenquility 5:24 PM: "I know what it does in the actual game”

Slinky stinks 5:24 PM: "wait is the MOON on ooc?”

ARGdov 5:25 PM: "You guys should probably be talking about this in ID”

Slinky stinks 5:25 PM: "or is it a normal moon”

Slinky stinks 5:25 PM: "yeah thats what i said”

mfgreth 10:31 PM: ((Greth posts a “thinking” emoji))

moonman31 10:34 PM: ((Moonman posts a “thinking” emoji))

moonman31 10:34 PM: wait”

moonman31 10:34 PM: mindfuck”

Slinky stinks 10:35 PM: "lol”

moonman31 10:35 PM: "is that actually greth”

mfgreth 10:35 PM: ")()()()(“

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "i guess he is”

moonman31 10:36 PM: "i thought you were evil”

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "wait”

mfgreth 10:36 PM: "i thought you were dead”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "why would greth be evil”

moonman31 10:36 PM: "i thought you guys said he turned evil”

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "mindfuck”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "i think that was some time shenannigan fuckyness?”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

mfgreth 10:37 PM: ":okretard:”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "i actually never noticed him being here”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "isn't that like inherently a bad idea”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "it also fucks with me on so many levels”

Slinky stinks 10:37 PM: "this is a mindfuck lvl 600”

Wolfcat 10:38 PM: ":munky:”

Wolfcat 10:38 PM: “me rn”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "UH OH”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "Wait what”

mfgreth 10:38 PM: "awa”

moonman31 10:38 PM: "i mean but seriously”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "Last we checked Greth had been posessed by Patrem”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "yeah moony”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "And he was travelling paralelos”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "i feel you”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "yeah”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "this is ooc greth i think”

ARGdov 10:39 PM: "Although he may not know hes being controlled?”

Slinky stinks 10:39 PM: "its a big mindfuck”

mfgreth 10:39 PM: "big brain time”

moonman31 10:39 PM: "i want to meme but i'm freaked out”

ARGdov 10:39 PM: "This is weirdo”

mfgreth 10:40 PM: "perhaps you should all aggregate your thoughts”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "moony this is more confusing to us”

moonman31 10:40 PM: "kasjf”

moonman31 10:40 PM: "what”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "Perhaps we should”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "I guess”

Wolfcat 10:40 PM: "very wyrd”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "What does it mean”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "Aggregation”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "AGAIN”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "@mfgreth who are you?”

mfgreth 10:40 PM: "I'm Greth, what?”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Are you “our” greth”

Wolfcat 10:41 PM: "are you ok arg”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Yes”

Slinky stinks 10:41 PM: "yes he is greth”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "sometimes I wonder that”

Slinky stinks 10:41 PM: "but WICH greth”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "I mean am I your Greth?”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "or is your greth here now”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "you mean me fuck off with that”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Moonmans not from our timeline”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "yeah”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "you know what they meant”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "So no hes not “our greth””

mfgreth 10:42 PM: "i said it was big brain time”

ADULT_LINK 10:42 PM: "im confused so”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "I am wondering though”

ADULT_LINK 10:42 PM: "i'm gonna go back to playin diablo 3”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Ok guys”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "Big brain time huh”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Remember when Tyler or whoever said things were about to get more complicated”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "oh shit”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "yeah”

mfgreth 10:42 PM: "ok you all are angry so let's have a candid conversation”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Thorin suggested a third timeline could be getting thrown into the mix”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Were not angry”

Slinky stinks 10:43 PM: "oh no”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Just confused?”

Slinky stinks 10:43 PM: "oh yeah”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Is “greth” ok?”

mfgreth 10:43 PM: "I am better than ever”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Do you remember the vlogs?”

mfgreth 10:43 PM: "yeah because I shot them”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "The vlogs you made”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Ok”

Jos 10:43 PM: "Whats going on?”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Hmm”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Greth is talking”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Resume”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Its confusing”

mfgreth 10:44 PM: "honestly”

mfgreth 10:44 PM: "Everything is great.”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Theres that phrase again”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Wait if moonman os beta Greth”

moonman31 10:44 PM: "this stepford motherfucker”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Could mean something or nothing”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "wait hold up”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "i didnt suggets a third timeline”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Nocta?”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "@mfgreth are you still in the timeline you originated from?”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "i said it'd be fucked if there was a third”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "nothing indicates that there is”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Same-same, really”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "I mean”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: "ehh”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Im just trying to figure this out”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "timelines are pointless imo at this point but yeah”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Who this is”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "I am Greth PRIME”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: "its greth you dingdong”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "or whatever”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: ":P”

Jos 10:45 PM: "Aka nocta?”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "So Im guessing hes our greth”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "greth dont meme pls”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "but if he is our greth”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Who probably has Patrem in there”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "why is he no patt”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "exactly”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "Just lurking in the background”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "Because patrem doesnt need to posess someoen full time”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "just when he is asleep i guess”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "He can just stick around in there head and when he takes over they blackout”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "hmm”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "still confusing af”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Not really but ok”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Think of it as Jekyll and Hydr”

Jos 10:47 PM: "Oue greth might be nocta”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "*Hyde”

Jos 10:47 PM: "Be cautious.”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Wait what”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "No nocta is Kevin”

Jos 10:47 PM: "If moonman os greth beta”

Jos 10:47 PM: "And greth vlogs got possesed by patrem?”

moonman31 10:48 PM: ":moony: :gun:”

moonman31 10:48 PM: “tbh”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "God fuck I dont know”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "This is bizarre”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "I gotta go for a bit”

Wolfcat 10:48 PM: ":truth: :moony: :truth:”

mfgreth 10:48 PM: ((An image titled “meta.gif” is posted))

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "Aaaah”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "Ill be back in a bit”

Jos 10:48 PM: "Well fuck”

Slinky stinks 10:48 PM: "oh KAY”

Jos 10:49 PM: "Moonman, send product please”

Jos 10:49 PM: "We need to evade ourselves from this chaos”

moonman31 10:49 PM: "oh ok”

Slinky stinks 10:49 PM: "moonman send your dealer”

moonman31 10:49 PM: ((Ascii art of marijuana is posted))

Jos 10:50 PM: "Perfect”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "ah yes”

Jos 10:50 PM: ":cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud:”

Jos 10:50 PM: ":cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud_lightning:”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "D I G I T A L   W E E D”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "hope babel does not get high”

Jos 10:50 PM: "Oh shit, so much smoke i made a ecosystem”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "Josniverse”

Wolfcat 10:50 PM: ":wariowaggle:” 

Wolfcat 10:50 PM: “:cloud:”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "ave you guys seen the gif greth sent”

Jos 10:51 PM: ((Jos reposts “meta.gif”))

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "he deleted it”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "File name?”

Jos 10:51 PM: "Meta”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "Of course”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "this is kinda meta”

Jos 10:52 PM: "Ton”

Jos 10:52 PM: "Undertale confirmed”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "na na NA NA”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "you know the song”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "okay, now talking about that gif”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "you know what does it look like?”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "just spitballing”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Probably”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Also offtopic:”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Who is more badass”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Scp foundation “

Jos 10:54 PM: "Or”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Windstorm ?”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "ok im out”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "my life has been weird enough lately”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "bbl”

Jos 10:55 PM: "Mm why?”

Slinky stinks 10:55 PM: "windstorm?”

Jos 10:55 PM: "Dont leave man”

Jos 10:55 PM: ":c”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "no im just logging off discord”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "sheesh”

Jos 10:56 PM: "Alright”

mfgreth 10:56 PM: "bye”

Jos 10:56 PM: "Be safe…”

Slinky stinks 10:56 PM: "take care g”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "FUCK OFF”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "not you guys other me ok”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "sayonara”

[bwicblog]

TC: h=owdy fr=om several h=ours in the future

MD: What are you doing se:veral hours in the future?

MD: This is Cyrrus, by the way. I'm uh MD: Tallow's friend. MD: My palmhusk came in.

SA: im dead and I'm back at my hotel. starving.

AH: what, really, Prisma?

AH: did you not buy food?

VV: ♚ ~ Room service, Honeycomb. Room service...It'd be rather upsetting if you simply wasted away, yes?

AH: lmao I don't think he's _that_ stupid.

AH: Only someone who deserves to be culled anyway just sits there and lets themselves die.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh my! Such a strong opinion. But I guess one so well suited for this world like a blueblood would have the most reasonable views on the matter anyway. Survival of the fittest and all that!

TT: hah The fu(\/)king nerd forgoT To eaT

AH: He was a little fucking busy.

AH: Also where the fuck have you been, it's been forever.

VV: ♚ ~ So many royal hues tonight oh my. hehe I'd say it's an honor but I think we all know where the honors lie. With all of us. Naturally.

TT: iTs been a few days (\/)hill The fu(\/)k Tf ouT TT: why did you miss me so mu(\/)h

TT: lol whaT

VV: ♚ ~ hm?

VV: ♚ ~ I know you're wonderfully educated. I feel reiterating myself would simply be offensive.....What is your name? I don't particularly enjoy just typing 'TT' to someone of such standing.

TT: whaT is even ^ wiTh you like wiTh The (\/)rown and The royalTy Talk like whaT TT: i donT parTi(\/)ularly enjoy jusT Typing To you eiTher so i mean

VV: ♚ ~ It's called an aesthetic and image which I'm shocked you don't care about.

AH: what, really? I must've missed you then. And I didn't but I wondered if your dumb ass crawled off and died or something.

VV: ♚ ~ Ohoho

AH: why are you het up about the poncy rust, TT

AH: this chatroom has way worse dickbags

VV: ♚ ~ Perdia Averic's my name. I appreciate the observation but my name is much more delightful I think.

AH: Read that as Purrdia for five seconds. You're a meowbeast in my head now.

VV: ♚ ~ oh how cute I'm rather okay with this :3c A lovely one I hope, one of those long haired cuties.

AH: uhhh I was just thinking like, a generic cat, I'm not that great with animals.

AH: what kind are you talking about. because I don't know fuck shit about cats, honestly. They eat squeakbeasts and roll around in catnip. That's it.

VV: ♚ ~ A long haired, cutey one it is. I got one for my dearest, Dolora recently here they look like this.

_VV has sent meowmeow .jpg_

SA: cats are much more precious than that.

RS: | Dolora has a Meowbeast | ? | How Charming |

SA: No, Sipara's comment about emerel and pheres banging and Hadean's kink 101 lessons quite did me in.

AH: Oh that's kinda cute.

VV: ♚ ~ Ah! I'm glad the darling honeycomb didn't expire.

SA: I don't want to eat anymore.

SA: ever, actually.

AH: ...their WHAT now

RS: | I didn't Think He wa the Ty

AH: never mind

RS: | What |

AH: I don't wanna know

VV: ♚ ~ And yes my dearest Dolora has a meow-beast. A lovely troll named Steamy said I should get it for him. So he is less lonely when I can't be around.

AH: lol, STEAMY?

VV: ♚ ~ Also....Prisma excuse me but what

AH: What kind of name is that.

RS: | Yes | I think | I am Going to Ignore That as Well |

RS: | Because I also Do Nott WAnt to Know | Frankly |

RS: | Tell Us about Your Cat | =:B | ! |

AH: also lmao at Hadean. I bet he's a total virgin.

AH: It'd explain his bad mood.

VV: ♚ ~ I think the blue blood here is much more interested in intimate details of others than a purrbeast. 0:

VV: ♚ ~ I haven't a clue as to what sort of name that is for a Madam but it was the one I was given so Steamy it is. Is your name any better for that matter though? I'd truly love to know it, as it's only polite seeing as I've given my own~

AH: what, mine?

VV: ♚ ~ I'd say no the other AH initial having blue blood, but I really do admire your boldness! So yes you deary.

AH: Idk, maybe you were talking to Pheres, I don't know your life.

AH: I'm Gliese.

WC: ~(Hello hello ^_^)

AH: well somebody's cheerful.

WC: ~(Wait did someone say my name?)

AH: cull an enemy or something?

WC: ~(I still regret giving you the idea for that poor cat) WC: ~(Is it at least getting fed?)

WC: ~(Haha, no. I'm just like this, I guess!)

AH: oh my god

VV: ♚ ~ Please to meet you Gliese-- VV: ♚ ~ No no it's a great cat!! It's being extremely well taken care of. I LOVE Prince Player Slayer.

AH: Your lusus actually named you _Steamy._

AH: ahahaha oh my god

VV: ♚ ~ And I'm sure Dolora does as well

WC: ~(Prince what)

AH: You named it fucking _Player Slayer_.

AH: That's the stupidest thing ever, I'm laughing my face off.

VV: ♚ ~ PRINCESS Player Slayer.

WC: ~(Well isn't that a bowl and a half of sugargrubs)

AH: bowl and a half of idiot crazy, lmao.

SA: what does being a "total virgin" have to do with someone's ... mood..

SA: I too am a "total virgin" and it doesn't change the fact i've been lobotomized.

WC: ~(Oh, it's just a silly insult!) WC: ~(There's really no problem with being the not pailing type!)

SA: I ordered sushi.

AH: I was joking, Prisma

SA: again.

AH: jeez

SA: I don't believe you.

VV: ♚ ~ Yes, Prisma, has the right idea. Being judgmental of my darling Princess is not a thing to do.

VV: ♚ ~ Who apparently has many things also going on . Enlightening.

AH: oh come on I _know_ Hadean's grumpiness just comes from his inherent trash fire of a personality, not a lack of being laid

SA: He isn't a trash fire. I rather like him.

AH: Oh I think he's great

SA: You on the other hand are another story.

AH: but he's a total trash fire

SA: My little princess, I'm sorry I kept disappearing on you,

WC: ~(Who's Hadean again?)

SA: I'm happy to have finally seen you.

SA: You are very cute.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh~? A trash...fire...sounds interesting.

WC: ~(I can barely keep up with all these names!)

AH: he's ID on here, redblood dude, professional food moocher and picker of stupid fights.

VV: ♚ ~ Thank you ❤ I thought so as well. You're just as handsome as your picture was. A pleasant surprise with how many simply lie.

VV: ♚ ~ Define a stupid fight. I want to know more now!

SA: a fight not unlike the one I was in with...

SA: I've forgotten their name 😦

WC: ~(ID? What?)

WC: ~(Wait that's right)

WC: ~(Different ID)

Sa: and of course. I have nothing to gain by lying to you about my looks 😃

SA: did you have fun at the fair?

AH: What, didn't you hear? He fought a jadeblood dude. a.k.a MN. a.k.a Emerel

AH: They both fucked each other up.

WC: ~(Oh my god) WC: ~(Are they okay?)

AH: Idk, haven't seen Em yet, but Hadean's fine...ish.

AH: ...I want to see Em, but I don't think they'd want me around.

AH: Which fair I guess.

RS: | That is About Right |

SA: Emerel is signifiantly less fucked up, but they still look like trash.

RS: | You had Plenty of Opportunity to Visit After the Fight |

SA: but I only saw them briefly

RS: | But He is Recuperating |

RS: | So | No | No Visitors | =:) |

VV: ♚ ~ A jade blood, oh my.

VV: ♚ ~ Sorry Honeycomb, I did have loads of fun but I'm rather intrigued by this supposed blood lust that has happened oh my!

AH: Oh please, Pheres, like you weren't freaking the hell out. And you wouldn't have let me in anyway. You don't have to pretend.

AH: I get it.

SA: it was exciting until it turned into a fight to the death.

SA: then it was less exciting.

RS: | Am I Pretending | ? | I thought I Said Outright | You are Not Wanted as a Visitor | =:? |

WC: ~(How awful) WC: ~(I certainly hope he recovers soon!)

AH: You said I could have visited after the fight, but I know full well that wouldn't have gone well.

AH: But it's fine. I'll see him later.

AH: I'm just glad he's recovering.

VV: ♚ ~If It was as deadly as is being told I truly wonder if a speedy recovery is possible?

RS: | Oh | Please | RS: | We have No Idea How that Would've Gone | Given You were Busy Fussing over Hadean |

SA: :3c

AH: Uh, yeah, considering he was in trouble.

RS: | But | Let's not Drag Out a Fight Into Public Like This |

WC: ~(Is this really what you want to fight about?)

RS: | It's Unbecoming |

VV: ♚ ~ No, no. It gives some good unbiased opinions on the matter!

VV: ♚ ~ There's two sides to every story and all that of course

WC: ~(Perdia. I don't feel like unbiased is the word you're looking for)

VV: ♚ ~ Oh but it is I promise!

RS: | Hahaha | Do You Constitute as Unbiased | ? | =:P |

WC: ~(Somehow I don't feel like unbiased is in your vocabulary)

AH: Sure there is, but your eagerness makes me kinda uncomfortable.

VV: ♚ ~ I have no idea who anyone or anything is. I have no bias. Negative.

VV: ♚ ~ Pure minded as they come!

WC: ~(Uh uh)

AH: So whatever, I guess.

WC: ~(Speaking of, why ARE you fake dating your matesprit?)

AH: wow.

WC: ~(What do you get out of that in terms of benefits?)

RS: | Perhaps I will Give You the Details in Private | Then |

RS: | In the Name of Gaining Relevant Second-ha | RS: | Hahaha | Heavens |

AH: one door closes another opens I guess.

VV: ♚ ~ I must admit the eagerness is in partial that I haven't had a particularly interesting--- VV:♚ ~ Excuse me

VV: ♚ ~ He is NOT fake

RS: | Who is Your Matesprit | Again | ? |

VV: ♚ ~ You can ask Dolora himself of our status!

SA: but little princess, that just means we can sabotage all of it.

WC: ~(You weren't exactly...good at hiding the fact that you don't care much about him)

RS: | Oh | ! | Dolora | ! |

AH: hahah wow

RS: | How Charming |

AH: who the heck is Dolora

VV: ♚ ~ I purchased him a meowbeast, to make up for my absence. I care a LOT about him

SA: Oh, perdia you have a matesprit?

RS: | She Does | ! | Evidently |

VV: ♚ ~ I do.

WC: ~(No, you got it to torture him)

WC: ~(I was there, remember?)

VV: ♚ ~ I did nothing of the sort.

WC: ~(Uh huh)

SA: Oh, that's exicitng news.

SA: I didn't know that.

WC: ~(If you say so >-> )

SA: 😢 now you will never truly be my little princess 💎

VV: ♚ ~ It's incredibly exciting and romantic and pleasurable. Being accused of anything less of my dedication to him it's rather upsetting--

SA: I'm teasing.

WC: ~(If you say so, dear.)

VV: ♚ ~ Ah! You almost had me Honeycomb

SA: If she says it';s romantic and pleasurable and exciting and she says she's faithful

SA: then she's faithful.

SA: why antagonize her furhter.

RS: | Oh | Don't Worry | Prisma |

RS: | Teasing or Not |

SA: Why so, Pheres?

RS: | Young Love is Rarely a Lasting Thing | =:B | Give It Five Sweeps |

RS: | I am Sure She will be There | To be Swept Off of Her Feet |

VV: ♚ ~ Hmph

SA: then what's your current relationship?

RS: | | I am Teasing | By the Way |

AH: lmao I side with Pheres on this one.

TT: i swear To fu(\/)king god if anoTher shiTTy ass supporT main ruins anoTher one of my games i am going To piss on everyThing everyone loves and break someone's fooT.

AH: young quads are - LOL HI

TT: also whaT did i miss

AH: not much

AH: sounds like you've been having a hell of a time though lmao

VV: ♚ ~ Is there a plan to be sweeping me off my feet? VV: ♚ ~ Ah, the crabby one has returned

WC: ~(Why don't you tell us how you really feel)

RS: | Hahaha | Unlikely to Last Past Ascension | Given Our Castes | RS: | But You Know That | So It's a rather Unkind Thing to Bring Up | Prisma |

VV: ♚ ~ You sound the sort to piss on anything regardless of being angered enough to do so

RS: | Did I Upset You | ? | =:( |

SA: It was unkind of you to bring it up to perdia as a joke or not.

SA: feelings are very real, no matter how short they are.

SA: or how idealistic and naive.

TT: all i feel is anger and vinager running Through my veins

AH: you are not the dude I expected a defense of young love from, Prisma, so I admit this kinda throws me

WC: ~(Would you like a chocolate bar)

AH: what're you gonna do

AH: beam it to them through the internet?

SA: i find feelings to be very important, seeing as I cannot feel them myself

TT: my lusus Tells me To never Take (\/)andy from sTrangers when he was alive

TT: buT The biT(\/)h is dead so whaT flavor

RS: | Heavens | I did Upset You | RS: | My Apologies | ! | It was a Joke | One that She Herself did Not Appear to Take Remiss |

WC: ~(That wasn't literal, Gliese)

AH: Then how can you find them important if you don't feel anything.

SA: It's fine.

WC: ~(I don't even have any chocolate anyway!)

SA: I am calm.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm not, dearest Honeycomb. HAHA!

SA: like always 😒

TT: i haTe This (\/)haT everyone lies

WC: ~(I'm sorry you had a bad day) WC: ~(I hope it gets better!)

SA: You're not what--

RS: | Calm | ? |

VV: ♚ ~ Calm. but I also kid. I'm fine. It's fine.

SA: oh. Good.

VV: ♚ ~ Everyone's just so incredibly colorful here.

SA: this is good.

VV: ♚ ~ what isn't there to be calm about.

TT: IT WONT GET ANY BETTER IF THERE IS NO (\/)HO(\/)OLATE TT: (\/)(.w.)(\/)

SA: I'm always calm Pheres, that was the joke.

SA: Hah. I have gotten you.

SA: like you have gotten me.

RS: | | | | Haha | =:? |

WC: ~(Sorry! >=<)

VV: ♚ ~ Chocolate, rage and vinegar. You're going to keel over and have a pusher attack at this rate my god.

WC: ~(My matesprit brought me some earlier but I kind of....ate it...all of it.......)

TT: i am like eighT i (\/)anT die so TT: anyway ThaT is unforTunaTe if They really loved you They wouldve given you more (\/)ho(\/)olaTe

SA: food is the ultimate display of love.

AH: booooring

WC: ~(I think he was also being chased by angry bluebloods or something at the time) WC: ~(So I didn't see him for long)

AH: why not having cool adventures together as the ultimate display of love.

WC: ~(Oh, we do!)

AH: That wasn't at you but okay cool.

WC: ~(Whoops, sorry)

AH: good to know you're not totally boring

SA: Pheres, you called emerel habibi

SA: are you from that area?

SA: I speak that language.

RS: | Oh | ! |

RS: | Haha | Ah | Yes |

TT: The only boring one here is The one Talking abouT languages To be Tbqh

SA: and I don't care what you think since you're pissing on things that make you angry like a spoiled grub 😃

AH: Languages aren't bad.

WC: ~(I wish I had a crunchy chocolate bar to offer you)

SA: I didn't spend very long there, but I remember the ocean.

AH: Man, get the stick out of your bum, it's not even funny anymore.

SA: I wish I could go back.

RS: | Well | Why don't You | ? | It's hardly Moved | Haha |

TT: you wish you goT The sTi(\/)k in your bum ba(\/)k????

WC: ~(Scandalous!)

SA: i feel like if I did it would ruin the illusion. You know, like rosetinted classes.

SA: perhaps I'm only fond of it because I don't completely grasp it.

WC: ~((. ◕ o ◕.))

SA: Do you visit it, very often?

RS: | The Ocean is Nice | Ah | My Hivestem was Farther In-land than That | But | RS: | I Saw It as an Adolescent | It | - | RS: | Hahaha | Glasses | =:B |

SA: Oh.

SA: yes, glasses.

MD: Hello.

SA: 😊

RS: | Mm | ! | Meukit Lives in Hanhai | Which | is One of the Northern Regions | of the Southern Hemisphere | RS: | So I Visit It Frequently |

RS: | I Suspect Yours may be Farther South | We've only Got a Touch of Coast |

MD: Coast where?

RS: | ? |

RS: | Oh | Ocean Coast | !|

MD: What does that look like?

VV: ♚ ~ Ah, nice, travel talk. I come back to more pleasant things. I'm so delighted~ VV: ♚ ~ Yes, do describe it in great detail. Make a slide show even, a full presentation.

SA: Meukit?

SA: Oh, it most likely was... I just remember a very large, gleaming city. It was like marble.

DD: A busy ᵰight full of oceaᵰ talk. Color ᵯe surprised.

SA: that was it, though. That and the ocean.

MD: Hello, Servitor.

VV: ♚ ~ Sounds incredibly lovely~ VV: ♚ ~ Servitor....?

RS: | Meukit | ! | cerebral Cottontail | He is on Here | Sometimes | He's got a Lovely Fashion Blog | RS: | And | Oh | That sounds Lovely | Yes | It was not Hanhai | Then | Haha | RS: | Our Cities are | Mm | | | Sooty | or Else | They're Temasek | =:B |

SA: Oh, is he perhaps the blue one?

AH: Frickin' clown-filled Temasek.

RS: | You should Visit Us | Then | RS: | It can Hardly Destroy Your Nostalgia |

DD: Ah. Hello agaiᵰ.

SA: perhaps I will. I want to travel.

RS: | But | Perhaps You will Find It Charming |

RS: | Mm | He is the Blue One |

SA: I've met him, briefly. I think...

SA: they were interesting to talk to.

MD: How is your lusus?

VV: ♚ ~ Allow me to join you if you do Prisma! I'm rather interested myself...and am in need of some proverbial leg stretching. Dense cities get to be too much often.

SA: Do you live in Provenence, Perdia?

SA: Pheres, do the cities there have the early markets? I've heard about them while reading about other cities.

DD: Sated for the ᵰight. Aᵰd how are you? Have you beeᵰ reflectiᵰg oᵰ what I told you before?

MD: Yes sir. MD: I think I':ve been doing well.

RS: | Yes | ! | We Do | Haha |

MD: Thank you for teaching me, sir.

RS: | All of the Cities Do |

DD: Well it's the least I caᵰ do. Are you acquaiᵰtaᵰces with the other trolls iᵰ this chatrooᵯ?

MD: I know Pheres.

MD: Hi Pheres.

RS: | | But | Oh | Hold On | RS: | I'm Sorry to Cut This Short | But | RS: | There is Something I Need to Deal Wit | ? | ? |

SA: do they? That's amazing... I need to acquire fresh dates. We had dates, I think. Perdia, we could go to the market and get dates.

SA: Oh, yes.

SA: take care, Pheres.

MD: Oh MD: Bye.

RS: | Hello | ! | RS: | Ah | Forgive Me | I'm not Placing a Name to Your Handle |

MD: It's Cyrrus.

RS: | Oh | ! |

RS: | Cyrrus | ! |

RS: | Hello | =:B | How are You | ? |

MD: Pretty good! Tallow isn't hurt today.

DD: Ah. The ᵯarooᵰ is Pheres. I see.

MD: So it's a good day.

DD: Well. Oᵰe of the ᵯarooᵰs.

RS: | | Wait | No | RS: | Ahh | Let Me Message You Later Tonight | ! | And We will Talk | I Promise | RS: | I need to Check on Emerel | =:( | My Sincere Apologies |

MD: What happened to Emerel?

MD: Is he okay?

VV: ♚ ~ I do not reside there but further inland actually Prisma!! VV: ♚ ~ Oh more guests~

RS: | Later | ! | I will Tell You Later | Haha |

MD: Okay

MD: See ya

VV: ♚ ~ Tah,tah~

SA: Further inland... That would be easy for me to reach. We could tour provenance if you would like.

DD: I hope I didᵰ't frighteᵰ hiᵯ off. ᵯarooᵰs caᵰ be so delicate.

MD: No MD: Emerel is his matesprit.

SA: I think Pheres is stronger than that.

MD: Did something happen? Does anyone know?

VV: ♚ ~ !! I'd adore that. Ballet is having some off time anyway, I should take hold of the opportunity. VV:♚ ~ I'm rather unsure actually if anything happened....Citrus was it?

MD: Cyrrus.

DD: Aᵰd Eᵯerel is...?

MD: His..matesprit. He's green.

MD: I don't know much else.

MD: He mostly talks to my friend more than he does me.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh that makes much more sense then. I'd have thought you wouldn't match such a fruit name after all.

DD: Ah. Hᵯ. Well good for the ᵯarooᵰ. Pheres. I'ᵯ sure greeᵰ is a good step for hiᵯ.

DD: Is the other ᵯarooᵰ botheriᵰg you ᵯD? Or. Cyrrus I suppose.

MD: I'm not : very fruity, no. MD: Whoops.

MD: Ah MD: It's okay. I don't mind.

VV: ♚ ~ Other maroon...

DD: Hᵯ. Well, if you say so. Yes, you. You're the other ᵯarooᵰ.

VV: ♚ ~ Excuse me, my higher hued companions, but I'd truly appreciate my name. Here! Let's start this over with proper introductions. VV: ♚ ~ Perdia Averic, pleased to make your acquaintance~

VV: ♚ ~ There~ Now I'm not just 'another maroon' I'm _a particular maroon_.

MD: Uh MD: Nice to meet you.

DD: Hᵯ. You ᵯay call ᵯe Servitor. Particular ᵯarooᵰ Perdia.

VV: ♚ ~ Charmed I'm sure, Cyrrus and Serpintine.

VV: ♚ ~ Oop! I meant Servitor.

MD: Now you're just doing this on purpose.

VV: ♚ ~ Had my nails done today it makes typing tricky at times haha

VV: ♚ ~ I truly apologize from the bottom of my pusher.

DD: Lowblood two-facedᵰess is ᵰot welcoᵯe. Try to keep your ᵯaᵰᵰers.

VV: ♚ ~ Not two faced at all I assure you! A singular face truly trying their best at the moment dearest seadweller. VV: ♚ ~ I take great pride in my appearance so really, I do mean that my nails can make it...rather difficult to type. VV: ♚ ~ You'd be astonished just how untrustworthy talk-to-text programs can be.

MD: That's how you actually talk???

DD: ᵯᵯᵯ. I suppose you ᵯust treasure your looks while they reᵯaiᵰ.

VV: ♚ ~ Do you mean my speaking pattern or something else darling?

VV: ♚ ~ If it's the speaking then why shouldn't I put on my best voice for such high company?

MD: You uh MD: Uh.... MD: Not to be rude, but you sound like the overmade villianess in a story.

DD: Cyrrus. Have you ᵰot experieᵰced a lowblood tryiᵰg to please?

D: I ᵯust adᵯit. Soᵯe do a lot better thaᵰ others. But the poor thiᵰg is tryiᵰg.

MD: Of course I ha:ve.

VV: ♚ ~ My apologies if it comes across as such! -- I am no poor thing however I assure you.

MD: I just ha:ven't run into anyone this bad at it.

VV: ♚ ~ Mmmm I do have eyes I can read just as well as you can.

DD: Of course you areᵰ't, Predie.

MD: Perdia, this isn't a good place for you. MD: You should lea:ve.

VV: ♚ ~ I'll admit you both may be a tad correct however in it not being the right approach! It's enough for cooler hues but not ones of such a cooled hue such as yourselves. VV: ♚ ~ I'm staying.

AH: oh my god

AH: fucking fishfaces

AH: lol yeah fight the power

D: ᵰow Cyrrus, doᵰ't be rude.

VV: ♚ ~ Perdia. Perdia. Not Predie, however close to pretty that name is.

VV: ♚ ~ I know for a fact you can read and write, despite what you're showing me right now.

AH: idk Perdia maybe they're just really good at faking

MD: Sorry sir. MD: Sorry Perdia.

VV: ♚ ~ I've seen better faking from a wriggler pretending to rest.

AH: lmao wow

VV: ♚ ~ Am i wrong in my statement?

AH: probably not lol

DD: Ah. The little ᵯarooᵰ has teeth wheᵰ it coᵯes to a keyboard. How quaiᵰt.

VV: ♚ ~ Perdia.

AH: you do know you sound like a huge tool right.

MD: I...don't actually know why you keep talking about your reading abilities? MD: You just said you were on chat to text!

AH: Not saying her name doesn't make you look powerful or cool, pinky.

AH: You just look like a dick.

DD: I suppose that ᵯakes you. Brave by calliᵰg ᵯe Piᵰky theᵰ?

AH: If you get off on intentionally being an ass because society lets you then you're just pathetic lmao.

AH: It's not brave if I'm just calling it like I see it lol.

MD: Can we stop fighting please?

AH: what, haven't got the stomach for it

VV: ♚ ~ I am on chat to text but I DO read the screen. It's a program where i push ONE button instead of the many on my keyboard then SPEAK so it may type for me.

VV: ♚ ~ Fighting looks much worse dearest I assure you. A little harmless disagreement is all that seems to be. Any of this really.

AH: lmao yeah

DD: Really Cyrrus, this isᵰ't a fight. You're a tiᵯid thiᵰg, areᵰ't you?

MD: No sir. MD: It just seems like a wasted effort to argue in a public chat.

VV: ♚ ~ I think we're bonding!

DD: Yes. Boᵰdiᵰg.

AH: lmao, Cyrrus, the point of the internet is for public arguing

AH: duh

DD: Pretty ᵯuch. Though it's a bit less fuᵰ wheᵰ you just drag it out aᵰd shiᵰe a spotlight oᵰ it.

VV: ♚ ~ See! All normal. Nothing to fluff your gills over. Or what have you that seadwellers do!

MD: I don't fluff my gills.

MD: They don't even ha:ve fluff.

VV: ♚ ~ Fluff doesn't pertain only to fur or actual fluff, honey.

MD: Tell me about seadweller gills, please, Perdia.

VV: ♚ ~ Simply to create volume etcetera

AH: lol I guess if fish know anything they probably know their own shit

DD: Soᵯe seadwellers have filaᵯeᵰts that are rather flashy.

VV: ♚ ~ Do you actually want me to talk about seadweller gills? I'd feel like a professor of some sort if I lecture.

MD: I didn't get that one. Just normal gills.

VV: ♚ ~ I know they're a weak spot for some and an EXCITING spot for others.

DD: Geᵰerally the surface seadwellers ᵯoreso thaᵰ the deeper oᵰes.

VV: ♚ ~ And that's my knowledge on that.

MD: Gross

VV: ♚ ~ I won't correct you on that.

AH: oh my god wow

AH: boy am I being _educated_ tonight

VV: ♚ ~ That was my exact reaction learning such a thing too!

AH: Lmao

AH: I'm sure it was

DD: I would chaᵰge it to a weak spot for all really though.

VV: ♚ ~ Not even from hearsay at that! You try having a nice meal with a seadweller and learning such a thing.

VV: ♚ ~ How can gills be a weakspot for all if we lower hues don't even have gills.

DD: All those with gills, ᵰaturally.

VV: ♚ ~ If you attack hard enough anything and anywhere can be a weakspot I'm sure. Which is easy for anyone brutish enough!

MD: How about we just make it a nothing spot and lea:ve it at that

DD: I'ᵯ sure you could teach us all about brutishᵰess Perdia.

VV: ♚ ~ A primeballerina wouldn't know anything of the sort beyond brutal practices.

AH: lmao yeah pull the other leg

AH: dancing can be deadly as hell

AH: comballet never stopped being a thing

DD: Hᵯ. You are the secoᵰd lowblood I have spokeᵰ to iᵰ here that practices ballet.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh don't go and give all the secrets away shhh~ ❤

SA: i apologize I fell asleep.

SA: what have i missed.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm being bullied by seadwellers. It was truly awful.

AH: yeah they were dicks

AH: well mostly the fuchsia

AH: violet here seems more confused than anything

MD: Hey

MD: What did I e:ven do to you?

SA: Oh.

AH: nothing that's why you get 'confused' instead of 'douchebag'

SA: 🤺 i will fight.

DD: Bullied ᵰow. Hᵯᵯ. Truly I aᵯ sure you are cryiᵰg your eyes out.

VV: ♚~ Fight for my honor, my honeycomb prince :"(

AH: lmao

DD: ...What's wroᵰg with this yellowblood?

AH: Prisma? He's a little weird, otherwise nothing

VV: ♚ ~ I am. But at least my makeup is all waterproof so nothing is ruined from it I simply look amazing as usual.

SA: What would you think is wrong with me?

SA: It's the least I could do, dear little princess.

AH: lmao he's a fish probably thinks we're all wrong for not kissing his feet

VV: ♚ ~ ✨

SA: I still have plenty leftover from my last duel for your honor.

DD: ...AH. Is this... Roleplayiᵰg...?

AH: HA

AH: no, we'd have to have

AH: what's his face

SA: No, we are simply being silly.

AH: Tallow?

AH: We'd have to have him in here, that's when roleplay hour happens

DD: I see.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm never silly, simply....mmm...less than genuine for the sake of fun. There that makes it sound classier.

MD: He's sleeping.

SA: I don't kiss anyone's feet, also.

SA: Hyperbolic?

AH: lol yeah

VV: ♚ ~ Yes!

AH: who would _actually_ kiss someone's feet

AH: that's totally stupid

VV: ♚ ~ Oh you'd be surprised.

DD: I would rather you didᵰ't. Seeiᵰg as how I aᵯ at least 500 feet uᵰderwater. I thiᵰk it would be hard for you.

AH: oh god don't fucking tell me if people do

AH: I don't want to know

AH: god you're worse than Prisma, at least he has a sense of humor

VV: ♚ ~ I'll not tell you then!

AH: I've been saved

AH: praise be to mother grub

SA: in Hadean's world that may be part of Kink 101

AH: AUUUUUUGH

SA: I will not let this go, I am so very upset.

DD: ...I... Hᵯ.

VV: ♚ ~ Kink 101...

AH: I'm gonna get him just for saying that. I'll buy him a hamburger and then _throw it away in front of him_

SA: cover your ears, princess.

AH: just to get revenge

VV: ♚ ~ I'm well ahead of you I'd truly rather not know oh my

DD: I do ᵰot. Thiᵰk I waᵰt to kᵰow about laᵰddweller kiᵰks.

AH: why are seadweller ones better

AH: and don't you dare fucking answer

AH: because I've never wanted to know anything less in my life

AH: but since you seem allergic to jokes

AH: I figure I'd better fucking clarify

MD: Why are we talking about peoples' kinks?!

D: Well. Siᵰce you said ᵰot to.

MD: How is that not pri:vate?!

AH: oh my god, what are you, 6?

DD: I could reveal soᵯe of the ᵯysteries.

AH: _No_

MD: Does it matter?!

DD: (c:)

AH: lmao you're being a weenie so yes but no seriously I am so gone if pinky starts revealing his true nature as a pervert

MD: Why are you obesessed with public kinks? MD: Are YOU going to go and trigger peoples' kinks?!

AH: oh my GOD I was KIDDING

MD: KID BETTER

VV: ♚ ~ Aw a 6 sweep old!! Hello darling aren't you precious. Oh I simply must turn the other cheek here, adorable. Really. Grubby I'm sure but adorable.

MD: No, I'm not 6.

DD: I aᵯ ᵰot goiᵰg to reveal aᵰythiᵰg. But it is fuᵰ. Kiddiᵰg.

AH: MAYBE GET OFF PUBLIC SERVERS UNTIL YOU'RE AT LEAST 8?

SA: 😂

MD: I didn't e:ven say I was.

AH: YEAH WELL THE EVIDENCE IS STACKED AGAINST YOU PAL

VV: ♚ ~ Oh boo. So you're just childish? Ahhh how utterly dissapointing.

SA: i love being facetious it went over 50% of the heads in this chat.

SA: i can rest well tonight.

DD: I'ᵯ coᵰcerᵰed there's soᵯethiᵰg wroᵰg with that yellowblood.

SA: I'm concerned that you find me concerning. I'm quite well, thank you.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm gravely concerned there's much more wrong with you and your friend .

SA: I do not need your concern nor do I want it.

SA: I agree with Perdia.

DD: Well we ᵯust agree to disagree oᵰ which side is coᵰcerᵰiᵰg I suppose.

AH: spoilers it's you

D: Agree to disagree. (c:)

VV: ♚ ~Being stubborn isn't very royal like you know~

TC: evenin all

MD: Hi.

TC: h=owdy

SA: i still wish to know what you find so concerning about me.

DD: ...Stubborᵰᵰess keeps throᵰes, soᵯe would say.

SA: most people think I'm a fucking delight.

DD: You appear to fall asleep at. Raᵰdoᵯ? Aᵰd scrolliᵰg up I saw ᵯeᵰtioᵰ of a lobotoᵯy?

VV: ♚ ~ Evening~

SA: Oh.

SA: Hah.

SA: I get tired very easily.

MD: Um, please excuse the concerned chat. MD: It's :very...concerning.

SA: Hadean isn't here to stop me from dumping my life story.

AH: yeah he just passes out but he's fine

SA: So I will exercise caution.

SA: and do it myself.

SA: 😃

VV: ♚ ~ Oh jolly, story time~

AH: lmao

DD: As far as I'ᵯ aware, ᵯost lowbloods do ᵰot get parts of their thiᵰkpaᵰs reᵯoved is all.

AH: it better be good, Prisma

AH: yeah well as far as I'm aware most fish don't start with thinkpans to begin with because they think money works instead

MD: !!!

MD: Why would you take out part of someone's thinkpan?!

AH: so what are we gonna do here

MD: I get it in a comic book but real life???

VV: ♚ ~ AH what was your name again? I need to take note not to forget. I really do enjoy your quips~

DD: I ᵯeaᵰ I would thiᵰk ᵯy fists work better thaᵰ ᵯy ᵯoᵰey. But I suppose you kᵰow best AH.

VV: ♚ ~ Kudos

AH: Gliese

AH: lmao that was weak but whatever

VV: ♚ ~ Maybe they lost their money....

SA: Oh, no.

MD: I'd rather talk it out.

VV: ♚ ~ And they only have fists to survive on...tragic.

SA: I'm not saying anything.

SA: for once.

SA; If you want to see it you can read the lowblood chat or scroll up.

SA; It's been there three or four times now.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm weeping once again from how depressing that thought is.

SA: I'm getting wiser.

DD: Oh. ᵰo. I have pleᵰty of wealth?

AH: lol, maybe I'll just ask Hadean

SA: Hadean better not tell you.

SA: or my little heart will be broken 😦

VV: ♚ ~ Are you never going to stop getting wiser, Prisma~?

AH: he'll probably tell me to fuck off

AH: let's be real

SA: I can be rather wise sometimes but usually I am rather mediocre.

SA: I am sorry, little princess.

SA: Maybe when I'm not very tired I will share.

SA: again..

AH: but then I can tell _him_ to fuck off and we can continue our beautiful bonding

TC: chats real busy this evenin

AH: lmao yeah thanks for the news captain obvious

TC: n=ot sure iffin i can keep up with all this chatter

VV: ♚ ~ No need to apologize my prince we can chat about lives and the like while traveling~

VV: ♚ ~ Do your best or just peruse, both are equally entertaining I assure you

MD: How are you tonight?

TC: if tha lowblood chat tweren't so empty all tha time I'd just linger there

TC: im d=oin just fine

SA: but then how would we get these lovely seadwellers here.

TC:fergetin my =own quirk is all

VV: ♚ ~ You seem unique enough with out it. Don't worry

MD: I'd talk to you in the lowblood chat if I could but MD: Well I could log into Tallow's account MD: He's not :very good at passwords

TC: i just pulled in ta the faire actually TC: im a bit late

MD: We were there earlier! MD: In fact, we're not far away still. MD: We ha:ven't made it home yet.

MD: It was really fun, though.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh look at you! You do have a friendly bone in that gelatinous body of yours! I'm absolutely stunned and delighted. VV: ♚ ~ Is it a one a day sort of use or were you simply grumpy?

VV: ♚ ~ It obviously had nothing to do with my own hue.

MD: Please lea:ve me alone, Perdia.

AH: lol wait

AH: you're at the ren fair?

AH: are you doing anything cool

AH: or are you just some lame kitschy souvenir merchant

VV: ♚ ~ I shant because you were rude to me earlier. I deserve and will take my revenge.

MD: And this is me hitting the block button that I just disco:vered.

VV: ♚ ~ Hmmm

VV: ♚ ~ I truly do despise when one is so hypocratic.

TC: i came ta d=o my usual TC: play a pleasant tune =or tw=o an maybe sell s=ome=one a quality hand made musical instrument

MD: Maybe we'll come back to hear you since we aren't far. MD: I'd ha:ve to wake up Tallow, though. He gorged himself on macarons and went to sleep.

TC: =ooh macar=ons

TC: well i'd be mighty flatterd if yall came back just ta hear me TC: id have ta play ya s=omethin real special

AH: lolwot, you're here too?

AH: figures

SA: I am...

SA: most likely going back to Provenence soon.

AH: what, not even gonna stay for Hadean?

AH: cold, Prisma

AH ...I'm kidding

VV: ♚ ~ Ohoho

SA: I would stay for Hadean and Sipara, or even Perdia, but I am also very tired and

AH: but at least say goodbye to the dude before you go

SA: I do not wish to be here if something else happens between Emerel and Hadean.

AH: LMAO

SA: I don't want to intervene.

ID: woowwwww what.

MD: Can someone please tell me what happened to Emerel?

VV: ♚ ~ Oh I'm no longer there, a costume is tedious to upkeep when it's so long .

SA: Of course I will tell Hadean goodbye. He is my friend.

AH: I'm not gonna let anything else happen between those two.

AH: God fucking help them if they try.

AH: OH SPEAK OF THE DEVIL

MD: Pheres didn't say he was okay and he normally would if he was, so what happened?

MD: Is he alright?

ID: damn right i'm the fucking devil.

AH: HAHAHAHA

ID: you chatty lil bitches. D:<=

AH: looooool

VV: ♚ ~ Ohohoooo

SA: 🎊

AH: yeah okay, this from the guy who runs his mouth 24/7 and has enough opinions to fill an entire gossip rag

SA: Emerel

SA: beat the shit out of Hadean.

SA: It was very bad.

ID: first things first- Emerel is fucking fine-ish. Because he's a fucking cheater.

AH: they kind of beat the shit out of each _other_ but yeah that's true

SA: But it is okay, because Hadean bea thte shit out of him too.

SA: and it was good.

AH: JINX

ID: two, wow what the fuck prisma I beat the shit out of him too!

AH: HAHAHAHA WOW

MD: Oh.... MD: Is Pheres okay?

AH: EVEN I DEFENDED HADEAN'S HONOR BETTER THAN YOU

AH: lmao he's fine

ID: it was very good.

SA: I just said that Hadean beat the shit out of him!

AH: prickly as ever

AH: so he's fine

AH: I know, I know, chill

MD: I'm glad. Pheres is our friend.

ID: damn right i did.

AH: It was just funny because I got there before you

VV: ♚ ~ Sounds like an eventful time has been had. Oho

SA: that was my single exclaimation point for the entire day now I have to wait to grow another.

ID: i shanked the fuck out of him. accidentally.

AH: oh _shit_

SA: you are ruining my fuck farm, Gliese.

AH: you used up your only one

AH: well damn, I guess I have to pay reparations now

ID: wait who taught prisma to swear.

AH: woe is me

ID: who is taking my darling boy's precious firsts from me.

VV: ♚ ~ Yes I'm wondering that too ID.

AH: probably the highbloods he grew up with we all have foul mouths

SA: ...

SA: What.

SA: Oh I've always known how to swear it is just usually polite to avoid it

AD: oO this chat is moving fast tonight~! Oo

SA: Why do you have unique swears to teach me, Hadean/

AD: oO that's new! Oo

SA: I am all ears, professor,

SA: Language 105.

AD: oO who's arguing tonight OuO Oo

ID: later pris.

VV: ♚ ~ You actually want to LEARN such a thing Prisma?

SA: No, I am being silly.

VV: ♚ ~ Ah, pity. There's some interestingly written on walls otherwise I could've shown you.

ID: uh. third. gliese i saw you being a shady twit and hauling my carcass off does not absolve you of that!

ID: so fite me you nubby bunny. =:P

SA: Perhaps next time, Perdia.

ID: ...also fourth what are you doing with the crown wench.

ID: pris is she taking advantage of you.

SA: who?

SA: Oh.

SA: little princess?

ID: yeah her.

SA: how so...

SA: She has been very polite and accomodating.

ID: has she asked you for anything?

SA: she even called me honeycomb prince because I didn't like mustard.

SA: ...I don't believe so?

VV: ♚ ~ Oh I hadn't realized you'd meant me I'm not a wench. Perdia. I prefer Perdia.

VV: ♚ ~ And I like it I think that's enough reasoning.

ID: hm. perdia i got my eye on you. don't mess with pris.

VV: ♚ ~ mess? How mess?

VV: ♚ ~ Me? Never.

ID: you know what i mean. so don't do it.

VV: ♚ ~ I adore him and his charms. I could never.

VV: ♚ ~ Would having your own crown make you happier?

ID: i don't need a crown to be a king.

VV: ♚ ~ I like that attitude.

SA: An entire royal court.

AD: oO crowns are so fun though! Oo

VV: ♚ ~ A good thought, unfortunatley I like the decorum of having one.

AH: lol come fight me at the banjo player's spot, Hadean, I'm listening to SICK TUNES.

AD: oO especially when they sparkle~ Oo

AH: oh hey Canela

AD: oO GLIESE!!! <333333 Oo

AH: what's up

ID: crowns are gaudy and only weaklings who need the power that an object can bring wear them.

SA: what about a tiara, Hadean.

AD: oO i just got done watching the joust thing! Oo AD: oO the one where people poke each other with pointy sticks! Oo AD: oO it was so fun! Oo

SA: much more secure and minimal.

VV: ♚ ~ Only Gaudy if you pick the wrong one!

ID: tiaras are just flimsier crowns.

SA: I'm buying one at the faire.

AD: oO tiaras are marks of pride Oo

SA: I will be pretty.

SA: since laedy refuses to acknowledge me as handsome.

VV: ♚ ~ Prisma get one yes! Let's match.

SA: I will pick the next best thing.

ID: ...pris you called lal ugly first i'm pretty sure.

AD: oO and even better, you can wear a tiara like a headband Oo

SA: Oh you're entirely right.

AD: oO which makes them infinitely better than crowns Oo

AH: you mean gouging chunks out of each other with lances, Canela?

AH: lmao

SA: Maybe I will get him a tiara too.

AD: oO yep! that one! Oo

AH: did anyone fall off their hoofbeast?

SA: do you think that will make him happy?

AD: oO i wanna try jousting someone! Oo

AD: oO sure did ~uO lots of people did! Oo

SA: I want it to have rubies on it.

ID: i think you buying him anything and telling him he's not ugly will make him happy.

AD: oO some guy got stabbed right through the shield too Oo

SA: Oh.

AH: Canela do you even know how to ride a hoofbeast

SA; that's much simpler.

AH: that's kind of important

ID: though i am firm in my belief that tiaras suck.

AD: oO i can learn! Oo

AH: okay fair

AD: oO you don't hatch knowing how! Oo

AH: do you have _time_ to learn though

AD: oO well.... Oo

VV: ♚ ~ So between tiaras and crowns which is better hm?

AD: oO probably not i guess...... Oo

AD: oO oh well Oo AD: oO maybe some other time Oo

AH: fuck 'em both, wear a flower crown

ID: neither. flower crowns are fine if you want to be palebait gliese.

AD: oO i saw some nice flower crowns at a stall back there Oo

VV: ♚ ~ It is getting warmer isn't it? A flower crown does sound rather fitting.

AH: fuck you flower crowns can be fucking intense

ID: intensely palebait-y.

AH: THORNS AND POISONOUS FLOWERS

VV: ♚ ~ Give me an example Gliese I want an intense one.

AD: oO gliese we should get flower crowns! Oo

AH: oh my god are you ever going to shut up about that

AD: oO and match! Oo

ID: yeah gliese. get a matching flower crown.

SA: Hadean is mad because I did not make him a flowercrown with the buoquet I got him.

SA: ...

AH: okay well if you have a crown with thorny roses, belladona, nightshade, and stinging nettles, _obviously_ that is a badass crown

AD: oO and she will look very intense in it Oo

AH: it could fucking kill someone

SA: ... What did I do with the buoquet did I leave it on the patio?!

AH: LMAO YEAH

AH: YOU CRACKED IT PRISMA

ID: like the person wearing it.

AD: oO maybe someone made a flower crown out of it Oo

AH: he wishes he was as stylish as me - lmao yeah

SA: no it was for Hadean!

SA: and i just left it there on Pheres's doorstep...

VV: ♚ ~ I shall get myself a belladonna flower crown for the season then it's settled. VV: ♚ ~ And oh my Prisma....

ID: i'm sure pheres won't fuck with it pris.

AH: yeah he probably just took it inside or whatever

AH: it's you, he doesn't have anything against you I think

SA: please don't poison yourself Perdia...

ID: yeah. he saw that you brought it. it'll be fine.

SA: I feel very silly... I never forget things.

SA: I'll come and get it tomorrow.

SA: where are you staying, Hadean?

ID: uhh a hotel. i don't remember the name.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh I won't. Others may have to worry but I'll be fine enough. But really that's all that matters I think! I'm fine.

VV: ♚ ~ A name of your place of staying is rather important.

AD: oO who's still at the faire? Oo

AD: oO i don't really want to leave until i have to myself Oo AD: oO it's so fun! Oo

ID: it's beneath me to remember.

ID: uh i'm at the fair.

SA: professor Hadean has much better things to do than remember his own address.

VV: ♚ ~ Is that so?

AD: oO what are you doing there? is it fun? Oo

SA: I will be at the faire for one more day, but that's it.

ID: i foguth a jadeblood and it ended in a tie i think.

SA: I am unsure who you are, AD.

VV: ♚ ~ I left but do hope the rest of you have a decent time.

ID: which was kinda fun if you like ties.

VV: ♚ ~ Do you like ties?

ID: fuck no am i a fucking wriggler ties are for two losers.

ID: but it is what it fucking is.

SA: If it helps any you still have honor 😦

AH: I'm still here lol

ID: honor and a whole lot of fucking pain. =:I it's no longer the floating too-much pain, it's the fucking everything hurts and i'm angry pain.

AD: oO oh i'm canela Oo AD: oO hi sa~ Oo

SA: do you need medicine?

SA: hello, Canela. I am prisma.

VV: ♚ ~ Let the anger fuel and heal you? I believe I've heard someone say that at sometime or another. Ah well you seem the strong type.

AD: oO hehe good to meet you~ Oo

ID: pris, drugs do nothing for me, remember?

SA: Oh. Yes.

AD: oO was that the fight where gliese's friend got hurt D: Oo

SA: I have some of my drugs if you would like to try those.

VV: ♚ ~ Are you TOO strong?

AD: oO both of her friends, actually! Oo

ID: if by too strong you mean too fucked up, yes.

ID: and yeah that was me.

ID: i was the rustblood if you didn't figure it out.

VV: ♚ ~ I didn't mean that but that answered that I suppose!

AD: oO ouch Oo AD: oO you stabbed the other guy too! i saw it! Oo

AD: oO that was kind of a scary fight Oo

ID: yeah. and i bashed him in the face with a brick. =>:D

VV: ♚ ~ A dirty fighter with resourcefulness.

VV: ♚ ~ That's interesting.

SA: 🏆

AH: I was gonna answer but I found Emerel's signmate and Hadean got there before me

SA: I still take offense to your tent threats.

AD: oO is emerel doing well now Oo

SA: emerel is fine. as disappointing as that is.

AH: He's recovering I'm told - hey

AH: Em is my friend

ID: oh yeah, emerel is doing fucking cheery.

AH: Badmouth him somewhere else

ID: nu-uh gliese, he pulled some shit tonight, he gets some nastiness.

AH: ugh whatever

AH: you're both dorks, I'm talking to Canela instead

AH: Canela, what else have you been doing

VV: ♚ ~ Hmmm. Sweet Honeycomb, Gliese,....Canela I believe and....well I think that's all. It's been grand but I've business to attend to. Have a delightful night all ❤

SA: sleep well, little princess.

ID: woowwwww fuck you too.

AH: lol was that to me or Perdia

VV: ♚ ~ ❤ hehe

AH: because honestly could be both

ID: ms. artificial sweetener.

AH: LMAO

ID: but also maybe both.

AH: oh shit, the suspense will keep me awake at day

AH: how will I live.

ID: y'know. fake sweet that'll probably give you tumours.

AH: LOL

ID: that's vv.

AH: I mean, I've met worse

AH: but lmao not gonna fight you there

SA: the likes of splenda and aspertame.

ID: damn right you ain't.

AH: LOL

ID: yeah. your buddy there is like splenda pris.

SA: What makes you think so?

ID: because we're both maroons.

ID: she's using one of the maroon tricks.

AD: oO hey don't make fun of gliese's friends Oo AD: oO SO not cool!!! Oo

ID: gliese was splenda your friend.

ID: because if so, i'm gonna be hella disappointed.

AD: oO mostly i've just been walking around the cute little shops everywhere! Oo AD: oO i even got some new clothes out of it hehe~ Oo

AH: lmao, let me put it this way

AH: I'd take her over the fish

AH: and she wasn't that bad I guess

ID: ...the fish is. ad?

AH: but she's not like

AD: oO oh Oo

AD: oO okay Oo

AH: okay wait no

AH: not you Canela

AH: there was this fuchsia dickhead in here earlier

AD: oO i thought i did something wrong there! Oo

ID: oh. okay. so this fish is okay?

AH: and they were being a total prick - nah sorry

AH: Canela's cool

AH: like, the only cool violet I know

AD: oO <3333 Oo

ID: /oh/.

ID: well. good on you for aiming high there gliese.

SA: oh, you mean the one that kept saying I was concerning and strange?

AH: yeah that asshole

AD: oO you seem quite lovely to me! Oo

PR: Hey everyone

SA: do maroons usually try to trick people into giving them things?

ID: well don't worry pris, you're strange but we're all pretty fucking strange here.

SA: oh, thank you both.

SA: it warms my heart.

ID: maroons that are flatscans will try and latch on to a sparker for protection, yeah.

ID: oldest trick in the book, get someone to fight your battles for you.

SA: does she know my psionics though or just that I have them. I do not remember.

SA: has someone done it to you, Hadean?

SA: hello, PR

ID: i mean, they've tried before. but when you know what to look out for, it's pretty easy to avoid.

PR: If someone's 𝞃rying 𝞃o use you for psi, jus𝞃 give em a li𝞃𝞃le zap PR: Or wha𝞃ever you can do

ID: i'm backreading and you're going to travel with her pris?

AH: lmao, seriously?

AH: that's fucking sad, I know a flatscan rust but she never did that

ID: pris doesn't do much zapping. uh. pr.

AH: because even though she's a total ass she's not a weakling like that

SA: I may, I don't know. I would like to travel, but not alone.

SA: I do much more throwing. But it makes me tired and hurt

ID: hey, some rusts can only get by off of mooching off those with power. that or they get taken advantage of.

SA: what did you do when you found out?

PR: 𝞃ha𝞃's why I added "or wha𝞃ever"

ID: uhhh let's not talk about the past too much pris.

SA: oh. Alright

AD: oO ahhhh this dress is adorabubble~ Oo AD: oO i think i love the faire clothes! Oo

ID: but yeah. some maroons act meek and mild. roll over and hope they're not worth bothering to cull. and some just try to round up some poor suckers to take punches in their place.

ID: the bottom is a sucky cut-throat place sometimes.

SA: 😦 I wish I could protect more people

ID: ...pris that was not the lesson to take away from this.

SA: was the actual lesson to be wary and concerned about the people I meet who are overtly nice to me for seemingly no reason?

ID: /yes/.

PR: Oh 𝞃ha𝞃's a good lesson 𝞃o learn!

SA: what if I do both. Could I protect you and Sipara and Perdia?

SA: and be worried about taken advantage of by everyone else

SA: it is a formidable lesson

ID: me and sip take care of ourselves.

ID: perdia is one of the ones who you need to be wary of!

SA: but I want to believe she is genuine.

SA: I almost used a fruit emoji

SA: I am not used to knowing people who readily turn down my helping.

ID: i mean of course you do, you're like a freshly pupated wriggler in your hopes of everyone being wonderful and having your best interests at heart, but...

ID: buddy. most people suck.

PR: Aww

ID: and most of them will stab you in the back if it means they get something out of it.

SA: I can take them

PR: 𝞃ruuuueeeeeee

SA: but I will be more careful

SA: 😄

AH: I _guess_ but mooching off another lowblood seems dickish.

AH: mooching off highbloods, fine, we can handle it

AH: but trying to mooch off another rust just because they have powers seems assy unless you're also contributing somehow

ID: =:/ some of them make you want to stab yourself in the back just to make them smile too pris. and you're a good target for that.

SA: ...

SA: but you wouldn't do that, right

SA: 😖

ID: what. /no/.

AH: Hadean is not that particular kind of dick

ID: if i was gonna stab you i would've done it while you were napping.

AH: also sup Dahlia LMAO

SA: I would have woken up please do not that take as an invitation strangers in the chat.

AH: see?? he's good. in that department

PR: No𝞃 much, was dying of boredom!!!

SA: and irnwoild ahve veeb vad

ID: sorry to break your pumper btw gliese, but scamming highbloods isn't always an option.

AH: lol, you have nothing to fear from me, I don't care. hell I'd probably shiv someone who _did_ disturb you, Hadean would skewer me if I let you die

ID: like look at fucking. port port.

ID: damn right i would gliese, you both have to get along.

AH: and then I'd have to put up with his bitching

AH: which is horrible

AH: see???

SA: hello gliese.

AH: sup

SA: port port?

AH: Port Mina

AH: my ass end of nowhere desert town

ID: where gliese is like. one of three highbloods.

SA: I am glad you wouldn't take advantage of me, Hadean. 😃 I am also glad gliese would not attempt to kill me in my sleep

AH: yyyyup

ID: tons of lowbloods screwing over lowbloods there.

AH: four if you count the banker

AH: but who cares about the banker

SA: Eugh

AH: though even Lapyen's questionable, she's my friend and all but she works here way less now

ID: i'm here to make sure no one takes advantage of you pris. it's a tough job, but someone has to do it.

SA: perhaps one day if we all believe very hard I will be able to detect it myself

SA: actually that is a lie

SA: my clairvoyance allows me to detect immediate intention.

SA: but it does not work unless the person is actively trying to lie to me

SA: thank you, Hadean.

ID: i mean, anytime. and if the fake sugar bitch hurts you, i'll light her hive on fire.

AH: huh

SA: port Mina sounds like it may require help of some kind, Gliese.

AH: that's a weird kind of psi

AH: does sound handy in some cases though

AH: lmao Port Mina needs more help than anyone can give

PR: Wai𝞃, how far is por𝞃 por𝞃 from wai𝞃 shi𝞃

SA: please do not light her on fire. I think a slap on the wrist will be fine.

AH: don't waste your time worrying

AH: LIGHT HER HIVE ON FIRE

PR: I can'𝞃 remember 𝞃he righ𝞃 name

AH: LIVE YOUR DREAMS

ID: i'm lighting her hive on fire, not her.

ID: not my fault if she stays in the hive.

AH: _lmao_

SA: that isn't my only psionic, Gliese. I would have been a catastrophic failure if it were.

AH: ...why

AH: oh wait

SA: we'll ensure she's out of it please

AH: you don't wanna talk about it

SA: I am tired of talking about it. Yes.

AH: sure whatever

SA: but if I must I will

AH: nah I don't care

ID: man look at you go pris, not talking about- well.

AH: not like I enjoy _my_ psi

AH: do whatever lmao

SA: even better then.

ID: i will sit on my throne of best psi ever and throw beetles to you poor peasants. it's fine.

PR: La𝞃e, bu𝞃 I remembered how 𝞃o spell i𝞃

AH: Dahlia has best psi here

AH: plants forever

PR: How far is por𝞃 por𝞃 from Derevnya?

SA: when you are better. We should have a psionics fight.

SA: I bet I will win 💗

ID: uh pris i saw you need a nap after throwing some knives.

AH: LMAO

AH: I BET ON HADEAN

SA: but if Sipara gets worms maybe I will be better

AH: NO FUCKING QUESTION

ID: ...man pris don't talk about the worms.

AH: why, the worms are just worms

SA: oh. Okay

AH: what are you a weenie

ID: hush up gliese. it's just not info he needs to be talking about.

PR: Well aaaanyways, you guys know any good places for cake?

PR: Or like, swee𝞃breads

SA: I think someone in this chat is a baker

ID: there's a place in the greenblood circle that had good sweetrolls.

PR: Omg

AH: hope it's not the greenblood I just ran into because he looks sad as _fuck_

AH: and also just like Emerel

SA: clones?

PR: Well I live in 𝞃he middle of nowhere so i𝞃'd 𝞃ake a minu𝞃e 𝞃o go anywhere

ID: oh. yeah.

PR: Bu𝞃 a girl needs a swee𝞃bread, you feel me?

SA: I don't know what the prevalence of surviving identical twins is on alternia. I imagine it is low

AH: no lmao Prisma don't you know what signmates are?

SA: sweets are amazing ❤️

invertedDissident has sent glieselikemyshirt.png!

AH: OH MY FUCK

SA: no, my sign only exists for me.

AH: ...HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET AHOLD OF THAT

ID: magic.

AH: HOW DID YOU EVEN PUT IT ON

AH: _BULLSHIT_

SA: 😂

AH: COUGH UP

ID: carefully.

ID: sips got it for me.

PR: LOL

SA: he believed very hard

AH: lmao of course she did

ID: pheres owed me a shirt.

AH: fuckin Sipara

AH: PFFFT

ID: but he had to fucking emerel wrangle.

AH: I guess that's true

ID: so sips grabbed what would fit.

AH: LMAO yeah none of Pheres's shit would fit you he's no taller than I am

ID: and it's too much fucking effort to take it off so i'm wearing it until it rots off me or my wounds heal. whichever comes first.

AH: LOL

PR: Bru𝞃al!

ID: i mean we cut it up to get it on me so i doubt he'll want it back.

SA: why did you say that, now I have to get you clean shirts or at least something you can slip on

ID: i left my old shirt as payment.

AH: _lmao_ I'm sure he has more

AH: HA

AH: I bet he'll love it

SA: I'm sure 🙄

ID: i mean i think it got plenty of his blood and mine on it.

SA: he was loving it on the patio.

SA: I am swiftly becoming. Unpersonable. I will rest

ID: yeah well i hope you ate your sushi first.

SA: Hadean, I will bring you your flowers and shirts tomorrow.

SA: oh, yes.

SA: it was Jurassic park roll.

ID: alright- i have no idea what that means but okay.

SA: and salmon sashimi

ID: i will see you tomorrow, explain it then.

SA: I'll bring some

PR: Damn, you're ge𝞃𝞃ing spoiled!

ID: sure, i'll try anything once.

SA: goodnight, friend. Goodnight, Gliese

SA: goodnight PR

PR: Nigh𝞃!

ID: night pris.

ID: so pr, got a name.

PR: Dahlia

AH: Dahlia's cool

PR: 0;

AH: her psiionics are rad

ID: gliese your definition of cool is sometimes questionable.

ID: just saying.

ID: but nice to chat at you dahlia.

PR: Cool mee𝞃ing you 𝞃oo PR: Wha𝞃's your name, ID

ID: hadean.

PR: I'll remember i𝞃

PR: Bu𝞃 also my psi IS rad

ID: something to do with plants i think i saw earlier?

AH: my definition of cool is perfect fuck you

PR: Yep! PR: S𝞃andard florikinesis and more

AH: I know EXACTLY what is cool at all times

ID: uh-huuuuh gliese.

ID: huh. neat.

ID: i never remember the fancy word for my psi.

PR: Wha𝞃 can you do?

AH: Supreme Dork Powers

AH: that's its name

ID: Ergo...kinesis...?

PR: No clue lmao

ID: fuck off gliese, i'm the coolest.

ID: i make constructs out of energy.

AH: LOL yeah whatever helps you sleep at day

PR: Oh 𝞃ha𝞃's freakin swee𝞃

AH: look, it's better than my psi, but a rusty nail to the foot is better than MY psi

AH: yeah but he collapses like a wriggler afterwards

ID: let me get out the tiny violin.

AH: fuck you, I will steal your tiny violin and sell it

ID: fuck off.

AH: truth is pain

ID: let's see what you do when you overextend your psi.

AH: LMAO I KIND OF CAN'T

AH: THIS SHIT'S TOO JACKED

AH: I'D HAVE TO TRY AND CONTROL AN ENTIRE ARMY OR SOME SHIT

ID: get to it. hop hop.

AH: oh my god

AH: was that a hopbeast joke

ID: probably turn in to a vegetable if you did though.

AH: Hadean that's uncreative as fuck

ID: i mean it wasn't.

AH: good

ID: but now it is.

AH: I hate you

PR: Burnou𝞃 could happen

ID: =:P

AH: are you _actually_ sticking your tongue out

AH: I wanna see that happen

AH: just to see how dumb you'd look

AH: if you looked dumber than usual I'd fucking clap

AH: what an achievement

ID: ....girl you wear the ugliest poncho known to trollkind.

ID: you cannot judge dumbness.

AH: I'm actually gonna ditch that I think.

AH: not because it's ugly, fuck you

ID: praise be to whatever wretched god is listening.

AH: but because it has my old quad colors on it

AH: Kiiind of outdated - oh my god eat a bulge

ID: \o/

ID: that's me praising right there.

AH: OH MY GOD, I WILL _CHOKE_ YOU WITH IT HADEAN

AH: YOU WILL DIE SEEING THE PONCHO

ID: i'd fight with the strength of a thousand seadwellers to escape that fate.

AH: except you don't _have_ that dumbass

AH: you have the strength of one half-starved lunatic

ID: your poncho will inspire it in me.

AH: oh my god

ID: dahlia, back me up. it's an ugly poncho right?

AH: I will shove it down your throat - dahlia's never even seen me

ID: well trust me dahlia, gliese is a dork with an ugly poncho.

AH: trust me Dahlia Hadean is an idiot with dumb tattoos

ID: my tats are the coolest, your poncho looks like twelve generations of fleas live in it.

AH: your tats look like SHITTY CLOWN PAINT you fucking loser

AH: my poncho has never been anything but fucking pristine

AH: except for sand but I can't avoid that in the fucking desert now can I

ID: pristine garbage.

AH: is that your internet forum name

ID: left to rot in the desert for a perigee.

AH: you goddamn thin skinned pansy

ID: then pressed in to the form of a poncho.

AH: oh my GOD it's just A FUCKING PONCHO

ID: says the pansy defending her shitty poncho.

AH: ONLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE THIS WEIRD FUCKING FIXATION ON IT YOU GODDAMN SHITPAN

ID: worse fashion sense than pheres i'd almost say.

AH: Oh NO

AH: you did NOT just say that

AH: this means WAR

ID: 0=:)

ID: when i win the war can i burn the poncho.

AH: when you lose the war I will shove the poncho up your ass

ID: man you're just obsessed with shoving.

AH: you infected me because you shove so much shit into the world

ID: first down my throat, then up my ass.

AH: from both ends

ID: don't blame your depravity on me gliese.

ID: it's alllll you.

AH: I will blame _all_ depravity on you Hadean

AH: you are the source of it

ID: ms. 'hadean hasn't gotten laid'.

AH: oh my god it was a joke

ID: nope. i'm now pure as the fucking freshly fallen snow.

ID: you're a depraved monster.

SA: kink 101

AH: LMAO

AH: _DRAGGED_

ID: kink 101 was not putting things in a chute that didn't belong.

ID: like a poncho.

AH: _wow_ rhfvolkmjnfhgvuio

AH: god I hate everything right now

SA: 👌

AH: mostly you

AH: but also everything

ID: mostly yourself you mean.

ID: i'm innocent.

AH: fuck you, I'm not a goddamn angsty shithead

AH: that's for losers and wrigglers

AH: LMAO you're as innocent as a full grown subjug

ID: /wow/.

ID: stop bringing clowns in to this.

ID: i'm sorry i'm not indigo enough for you. =:(

ID: further depravity, gliese has a clown kink.

AH: oh my GOD NO

AH: NO NO NO NO NO

SA: 😩😴 what kink class is that

AH: god no I hate purples.

ID: uh-huh.

AH: they all fucking suck.

SA: at least a 300 course

AH: I don't even KNOW any purples.

ID: I saw the clown horn gliese.

AH: _Prisma_

AH: Prisma why

SA: I work for a number of them sometimes...

AH: lmao you have my sympathy

SA: because I just now put on my jammies and laid back down.

SA: and thus I am barely awake still to antagonize you

SA: they pay eell

ID: gliese is the head professor of clown kink university.

SA: my handler was an indigo. As well

Sa: but I dislike clowns

AH: I have never read a worse sentence in my life

AH: and I don't think I ever will

AH: wow

SA: clown kink university

SA: alma Mater

ID: she got her phD in juggalonomics.

AH: too busy dying to squash this garbage like it deserves.

AH: why

ID: secretly has a 'down with the clowns' tramp stamp.

SA: a minor in face paint interpretation. She secretly knows exactly what your tattoos mean and it's her favorite

SA: does it have a squeaky horn under the text

ID: of course. pointing down.

SA: 😳

SA: 😴

ID: ...did we break her.

SA: gliese come back

SA: we love you

ID: speak for yourself there pris.

SA: do you islike plaronic loce--

AH: I need to drink to forget

ID: drinking is how you got the tramp stamp to begin with gliese.

SA: whiskeyyy

AH: _god I hate you so much_

AH: you know what Prisma.

AH: that's a great fucking idea.

AH: IT'S WHISKEY HOUR.

AH: GOODBYE.

SA: tequila is what you drink to make mistakes

ID: man she's gonna wake up covered in face paint and smelling of faygo again.

SA: sticky with a cheap red wig

SA: 🎉🎉🎉

ID: ....y'know what, that's the perfect ending to this chat to make everyone curious enough to scroll up and read. gj pris.

SA: ❤️

SA: I can't keep my eyes open

SA: feel better Hadean

SA: 😴

ID: getting there. thanks pris.

ID: go sleep.

OA: :o)

OA: I'D LIKE TO CONFIRM THAT TRAMP STAMP IS absolutely ARt.

OA: cOMIC SANS AND EVERYTHING, JUST LIKE THE MESSIAH'S INTENDEd.

[viralhottopics]

Patrick Stewart says he’s ‘absolutely’ interested in a Professor X cameo in ‘Legion’

Will David find his famous father in 'Legion' Season 2?

Image: Michelle Faye

Have you wrapped your head around that epic Legion finale? Did you walk away feeling as mentally empowered as David Haller, or was it crazy-making enough to have you ready to check into an asylum?

Either way, star Dan Stevens and showrunner Noah Hawley are satisfied with the results, even if the finale’s surprising mid-credits sequence might leave you with more questions than answers heading into Season 2.

“In terms of putting it as a post-credits sequence, I think there’s a proud tradition of that on the Marvel features side,” Hawley told reporters in a conference call. “It’s the beginning of another thought. I wanted to give people the end song and the feeling of watching the credits, to let them absorb the complete story they just watched. And then I wanted to tease them as to what chapter two is going to be.

SEE ALSO: ‘Legion’ creator wants the show to prove itself before you call it an X-Men series

But what is chapter two going to be?

“I like this idea of having to face our demons, and the idea that in the first season, that was an internal struggle for David, and now we’re taking something that has so much power over him psychologically and emotionally and making it an exterior agent. There’s going to be something very complicated about going to war with yourself,” Hawley revealed. “We’ve now created a villain for David that is worthy of building a whole story around. The backstory of this thing, and their relationship and their history, is so nuanced and rich that it makes for a potential showdown that we’re very invested in as an audience, as opposed to doing a villain-of-the-year kind of approach.”

As David unlocked more secrets about his past, the show grew closer to revealing the identity of his father, who in the comics is Charles Xavier aka Professor X leader of the X-Men. We got a glimpse of his iconic wheelchair in episode 7, and Hawley says they plan to address the mystery of David’s birth parents at some point in the show.

“Any person who learns that they were adopted is going to have those questions and want to seek out those birth parents. I think that’s a very natural story,” Hawley said during the conference call. “Certainly where we left David at the end of the first year, that can’t be his first priority, but in terms of coming to understand who he is and what his purpose is on this world? I think that that’s definitely something we’re going to approach.

SEE ALSO: Bryan Singer explains why the X-Men franchise is perfect for TV

Obviously, if the show wants to involve existing actors from the X-Men franchise, there’s some red tape to get through.

“It’s a creative conversation, but also a sort of corporate conversation on some level, in terms of the movie studio and their relationship to the X-Men and the characters they want in the movies and want to protect, potentially,” Hawley said. “Were we to want to have Professor X on the show, or even Patrick Stewart on the show, or even James McAvoy, or one of the actors it’s a conversation both with the actor and with the studio. I don’t know, I haven’t really dived into that quandary yet. But I certainly need to start thinking about it.”

Luckily, Stevens recently appeared on an episode of The Late Late Show with James Corden with Sir Patrick Stewart, joking that since Professor X is David’s father, “essentially I’ve got a job offer for Sir Patrick,” who responded that he was “absolutely, 100 percent” in. So Hawley should probably start making some calls.

Here’s what else Stevens had to say about the first season of Legion and his hopes for Season 2 in a conference call with reporters:

On the truth behind Davids powers and his mental state achieved by the end of the season, and the mysteries that remain:

Stevens: The [finale] has some questions that have been answered [but] I dont think all of them have been. Thats kind of exciting. The show was intended to have a sort of experiential effect, and really to try and get inside Davids head and the way that he sees the situation. I think some of the confusion is delivered, and quite effective.

I think particularly in episode 7, theres quite a lot of exposition and a lot of big questions are answered there. And at the end of [the finale], which I would encourage people to sit through the credits so they dont miss the very final beat of where this is all going Id like that answered in Season 2.

On that crazy, what-the-hell-just-happened mid-credits scene:

Its always intriguing, I think, when you get the final script of the season of anything. How are they going to put a button on this, but also maybe tease out for another one? Of course when we shot that, we didnt know for sure that we were going to get a Season 2.

I like the seasons of any show that hang on a bit of a knifes edge, and its kind of a resolution, but theres a lot of confusion and further questions. Its a really fun scene. It continues to be as playful as the rest of the season was

On whether the door is open to bring in further elements from either the established X-Men cinematic universe, or the deep mythology of the X-Men comic books:

Thats really a question for Noah. Yeah, I dont really have the answers to that. Its certainly possible. Its been fun teasing certain elements throughout Season 1 that do link into the preexisting X-Men universe. Im sure there will be more of that, but I couldnt say more than that.

David faced a lot of demons in Season 1, but this was the scariest

Image: Michelle Faye/fx

On the most mind-bending curveball the show threw him as an actor:

The scene where Im having dialogue with my rational self was a pretty mind-blowing script to read. I had no idea how we were going to shoot that. It reveals a lot about David, it reveals a lot about the story, about whats maybe happening in and around himIt was actually really fun to shoot, but it was challenging.

On whether that British accent Davids rational mind-self spoke in was a nod to Stevens own national origins, or a sly wink Patrick Stewart’s Professor X:

I wouldnt go as far as to say its specifically a Patrick Stewart impression, but it made us laugh that the idea that Davids rational self might be British. David sort of thinks its funny that his dad might be British. Theres kind of a playful thing going on there.

Im pleased that it sounds a bit like Patrick Stewart, I guess! Im not sure I was going specifically for that, but yeah, its nice that theres a hint of it there.

On how much more territory within Davids powerful and damaged psyche remains to be mined in future seasons:

If you know the comics, there are still hundreds of elements that we havent really explored in terms of Davids mental makeup. Its a fun line to play with, where he feels like hes got a grip on things, when actually hes got a grip on one or two things but the rest is still very much up in the air and theres a lot of things flying around in there.

I think one of the interesting narratives, I guess, in the first season was that idea that we are the stories that we tell ourselves. This idea that hes been told that he is schizophrenic and that he is this menace, have really defined him for the majority of his life. Its about dismantling that, and reassembling something in its place. So theres a weird adolescence that he goes through in the course of [this] season. Yeah, theres a lot of interesting elements still to play. Hes not on as concrete ground as he might seem at the end of this season, I think.

On the various sources of inspiration that helped him shape Davids very particular mental afflictions:

There were a number of different sources, I guess, that I took ideas from: a lot of interviews with sufferers that I found online; I managed to speak with suffers of different mental conditions, specifically paranoid schizophrenia; I also talked to a psychiatrist who treats the condition.

I take inspiration from a lot of different places, really, different kinds of literature. Theres obviously quite a psychedelic influence on Legion, so looking at that kind of literature and art; looking back at the original comics and getting a glimpse of the character and his state from that. Bill Sienkiewiczs artwork, particularly the expression really coming through that stuff, was very helpful.

WATCH: Hugh Jackman and Patrick Stewart know why Magneto isn’t in ‘Logan’

Read more: http://on.mash.to/2nwzfUx

from Patrick Stewart says he’s ‘absolutely’ interested in a Professor X cameo in ‘Legion’

[jamesgeiiger]

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it?

Book excerpt: In Melissa Leong’s latest book, Happy Go Money, the former Financial Post reporter challenges everyone to revamp their relationship with money. Here’s where to start.

“If I only had a little more money, I’d be happier.”

When was the last time that you had this thought? Every day, we make choices based on the idea that joy can be bought and that more money makes everything better. We take the new job with the extra hour in traffic because it pays more. We put a coat on credit because it’s designer. We buy the big house because it has a yard for our future kids and a kitchen island that’s “an entertainer’s dream.”

To be fair, scientifically speaking, when we see something we want, a new pair of shoes or a gadget, we do feel joy; it triggers a patch of tissue in the brain, the nucleus accumbens, the so-called sex and money area. It gets activated when humans receive a reward, whether drugs, money or food. Then when we buy something, we get a delicious burst of dopamine in the brain.

That sounds sexy and yummy and all, but the euphoria doesn’t last. Then we just need more stuff. All that crap we buy loses its lustre. When the novelty wears off and the shopping high from the endorphin and dopamine dump dissipates, we’re left with a void and possibly regret.

More people are going broke in Canada as interest rates rise

Tax tips to kickstart 2019 for every age group, from teens to seniors

All the frugality in the world won't let this millennial retire at 45

“Why did I spend money on this?!?” we ask. Because I need it. Because I deserve it. Because I had a rough day. Because I have no willpower. Because it was on sale. Because it’s a habit. Because it was a whim, a knee-jerk reaction. But when you get down to it? Because I want to be happy.

So, what do we actually need to be happy? Let’s break down our thoughts on the subject and rebuild. This is me swinging on a wrecking ball (fully clothed) to help.

The magic number

We all need a certain amount of money to be happy. But how much?

For those of us who are on the verge of losing our homes, who fret about feeding our children, who cringe when the phone rings because debt collectors may be calling, without question, more money will make us happier. But for the rest of us, before connecting cash with joy, we need to talk about what we mean by “happy.”

Scientists in neuroeconomics (the study of how we make economic decisions) break happiness into two types:

1. Life satisfaction: an evaluation of your well-being as a whole (the kind of happy where you’re pleased with life in general). 2. Day-to-day mood: the highs and lows; the joy, stress, sadness, anger and affection that you experience from one moment to the next — how you feel today, how you felt yesterday. (The kind of happy that most of us relate to — the right now happiness.)

With life satisfaction, the richer people got, the more satisfied they were with their lives. In worldwide studies, people in richer countries reported higher life satisfaction than those in poorer countries. (We should also consider that wealthier countries are more politically stable, more peaceful and less oppressive — which affects well-being.) But according to a 2018 Purdue University study, there was a limit: $95,000 U.S. (pre-tax, per single-family household). Above that, more money didn’t mean that you were more satisfied. With day-to-day happiness, the threshold is $60,000 to $75,000 per household, according to various studies. The 2018 study showed that after these salaries are met, life satisfaction and day-to-day happiness actually slightly decrease with more money.

( function() { pnLoadVideo( "videos", "OF6AG33YZlg", "pn_video_323569", "", "", {"controls":1,"autoplay":0,"is_mobile":""} ); } )();

What the what?

Well, apparently, when all of our basic needs are met, we become driven by other desires such as chasing after more material stuff and comparing ourselves to others, which make us unhappy. Also, high incomes can come with high demands (more working hours, more stress and less time with family and for leisure).

This doesn’t mean that we should all go out and try to make exactly $75,000 a year — our so-called feel-good financial sweet spot. The studies are averages, and we all need different things to be happy. But all of us find joy in some simple things — kisses, laughter, getting ID’d over the age of 25.

Marketing professor Hal Hershfield once told me, “Even if I have an amazing car in my driveway, a huge house and a big fat income, that doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll be happier on a day-by-day basis, because the types of things that influence happiness are who I interact with, how I spend my time and the things that I do.”

Think of some of your happiest times in the past week. Were you spending it with people? Were you taking time to enjoy an activity, going for a run or catching up with a good friend? Would a wad of cash have made those moments that much better?

Probably not. If you answered “yes” to the latter question, how much more do you need to be happy? Read on.

Your magic number is probably wrong

Let’s do an exercise together.

How happy are you on a scale of one to ten?

Now think about how much money you have in the bank, your salary. How much more money would you need to be a perfect 10?

Michael Norton, who teaches at Harvard Business School and co-authored Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending, surveyed average-income earners and high-net-worth Britons (with a net worth of more than $1 million), and he asked them those questions. “Everybody said two to three times as much money,” Norton told me.

“Why is that a problem?” I asked, estimating the same for myself.

“That’s a problem because people at $1 million said, ‘If I had $3 million, I’d be a perfect 10. Except that people who had $3 million said, ‘If I had $9 million, I’d be a perfect 10.’”

Basically, happiness is on a sliding scale. Think about how much this sucks. No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions. When you find the gold at the end of the rainbow, the pot is just too damn small, and then you’re off again, chasing more rainbows.

No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions.

It’s like a curse really. It also takes the fun out of my childhood dream of winning a million-dollar lottery. That was the very first fantasy I ever had: winning a jackpot and marrying one of the New Kids on the Block (anyone but Danny). I’d have fancy clothes and we’d eat at Red Lobster every weekend. (Still my idea of a hot date today.)

But despite what we may think, winning the lottery doesn’t buy you a one-way ticket to Euphoria Town. Take this famous study from 1978 where researchers asked two very different groups about their happiness: recent Illinois State Lottery winners who scored $50,000 to $1 million and recent victims of catastrophic accidents who were now paraplegic or quadriplegic. They asked the lottery winners and the accident victims to rate how happy they were at that stage of their lives, how happy they were before the life-altering event and how happy they expected to be in a few years. They asked them to rate how pleasant they found simple activities (talking with a friend, watching TV, eating breakfast, buying clothes, getting a compliment, etc.).

Seriously? Who’s happier, the person cruising in the wheelchair or in the Lamborghini?

Yes, the lottery winners were happier in the moment. The winners reported feeling more present happiness. But the people with disabilities rated their future happiness higher. They also enjoyed the simple things in life more: they had more appreciation for the mundane pleasures of things such as hearing a joke or reading a magazine. Actually, research shows a link between high income and a reduced ability to savour small pleasures. Experts blame it on hedonic adaptation — our tendency to just get used to whatever we have. Even a dramatic life improvement eventually becomes the new normal. You don’t smell the roses because they’re everywhere, any time of the day. And research has shown that our inner thermostats are set some-where between happiness and sadness: they can rise and fall depending on circumstance, but they generally return to that baseline. So, if you were a miserable moaner before hitting the jackpot, you’ll likely just be a rich miserable moaner.

In another real-life example, Markus Persson, who created Minecraft and sold it to Microsoft for $2.5 billion in 2014, reportedly bought a $70-million mansion, complete with a candy wall, vodka and tequila bars, designer fire extinguishers (because safety first, fashion second) and 15 bathrooms equipped with $5,000 remote-control operated toilets with air deodorizers and heated seats. But in 2015, he tweeted, “Hanging out in Ibiza with a bunch of friends and partying with famous people, able to do whatever I want, and I’ve never felt more isolated.” In another tweet, he said, “The problem with getting everything is you run out of reasons to keep trying, and human interaction becomes impossible due to imbalance.”

Now this could be super depressing to you. For me, it’s reassuring. It tells me that no single event or any material thing or external factor ultimately defines my happiness. Human beings are adaptable. A million dollars or a misfortune, over time, can become the new normal. Sure, with money, you’ll enjoy stylishly fighting fire with your Louis Vuitton extinguisher, but the riches may also make old pleasures seem less enjoyable.

So remember, there’s a better use of your money than playing the lottery. The odds of winning the Powerball jackpot prize are 1 in 292 million — and odds are that more money won’t guarantee that your days will be happier anyway.

Your happy money to-do list

If you find yourself thinking, “If I only had (insert anything), I’d be happy,” challenge it. Ask your partner or co-worker or friend to poke you (lovingly) if they ever hear you say that phrase. It’ll be like that awful baby shower game where you can’t say “baby” — but for your life.

If you’re relying on something (or someone) to make you happy, you’re wasting your time and energy. If affirmations are your jam, write this down and stick it somewhere: “I control my own happiness.”

Name three big things that make you happy regardless of money (good health or a loving partner). Now name three very specific things (sleeping in on the weekend, your jam on repeat). Repeat the exercise every time you feel crappy about your financial situation — or any situation.

Stop playing the lottery. Now. Next time you want to play the lottery, buy someone a coffee or put the money into a donation box instead for a guaranteed happiness payoff.

Money talks

If you think more money would make you happier, how much more?

How would your life be better with more money?

Think of a time when you made less money. Were you unhappier then? How much?

Think of some of your happiest moments from the last week. Would more money have made those moments better?

Excerpted and adapted from Happy Go Money by Melissa Leong. © 2019 by Melissa Leong. All rights reserved. Published by ECW Press Ltd. http://www.ecwpress.com

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it? published first on https://worldwideinvestforum.tumblr.com/

[jamesgeiiger]

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it?

Book excerpt: In Melissa Leong’s latest book, Happy Go Money, the former Financial Post reporter challenges everyone to revamp their relationship with money. Here’s where to start.

“If I only had a little more money, I’d be happier.”

When was the last time that you had this thought? Every day, we make choices based on the idea that joy can be bought and that more money makes everything better. We take the new job with the extra hour in traffic because it pays more. We put a coat on credit because it’s designer. We buy the big house because it has a yard for our future kids and a kitchen island that’s “an entertainer’s dream.”

To be fair, scientifically speaking, when we see something we want, a new pair of shoes or a gadget, we do feel joy; it triggers a patch of tissue in the brain, the nucleus accumbens, the so-called sex and money area. It gets activated when humans receive a reward, whether drugs, money or food. Then when we buy something, we get a delicious burst of dopamine in the brain.

That sounds sexy and yummy and all, but the euphoria doesn’t last. Then we just need more stuff. All that crap we buy loses its lustre. When the novelty wears off and the shopping high from the endorphin and dopamine dump dissipates, we’re left with a void and possibly regret.

More people are going broke in Canada as interest rates rise

Tax tips to kickstart 2019 for every age group, from teens to seniors

All the frugality in the world won't let this millennial retire at 45

“Why did I spend money on this?!?” we ask. Because I need it. Because I deserve it. Because I had a rough day. Because I have no willpower. Because it was on sale. Because it’s a habit. Because it was a whim, a knee-jerk reaction. But when you get down to it? Because I want to be happy.

So, what do we actually need to be happy? Let’s break down our thoughts on the subject and rebuild. This is me swinging on a wrecking ball (fully clothed) to help.

The magic number

We all need a certain amount of money to be happy. But how much?

For those of us who are on the verge of losing our homes, who fret about feeding our children, who cringe when the phone rings because debt collectors may be calling, without question, more money will make us happier. But for the rest of us, before connecting cash with joy, we need to talk about what we mean by “happy.”

Scientists in neuroeconomics (the study of how we make economic decisions) break happiness into two types:

1. Life satisfaction: an evaluation of your well-being as a whole (the kind of happy where you’re pleased with life in general). 2. Day-to-day mood: the highs and lows; the joy, stress, sadness, anger and affection that you experience from one moment to the next — how you feel today, how you felt yesterday. (The kind of happy that most of us relate to — the right now happiness.)

With life satisfaction, the richer people got, the more satisfied they were with their lives. In worldwide studies, people in richer countries reported higher life satisfaction than those in poorer countries. (We should also consider that wealthier countries are more politically stable, more peaceful and less oppressive — which affects well-being.) But according to a 2018 Purdue University study, there was a limit: $95,000 U.S. (pre-tax, per single-family household). Above that, more money didn’t mean that you were more satisfied. With day-to-day happiness, the threshold is $60,000 to $75,000 per household, according to various studies. The 2018 study showed that after these salaries are met, life satisfaction and day-to-day happiness actually slightly decrease with more money.

( function() { pnLoadVideo( "videos", "OF6AG33YZlg", "pn_video_323569", "", "", {"controls":1,"autoplay":0,"is_mobile":""} ); } )();

What the what?

Well, apparently, when all of our basic needs are met, we become driven by other desires such as chasing after more material stuff and comparing ourselves to others, which make us unhappy. Also, high incomes can come with high demands (more working hours, more stress and less time with family and for leisure).

This doesn’t mean that we should all go out and try to make exactly $75,000 a year — our so-called feel-good financial sweet spot. The studies are averages, and we all need different things to be happy. But all of us find joy in some simple things — kisses, laughter, getting ID’d over the age of 25.

Marketing professor Hal Hershfield once told me, “Even if I have an amazing car in my driveway, a huge house and a big fat income, that doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll be happier on a day-by-day basis, because the types of things that influence happiness are who I interact with, how I spend my time and the things that I do.”

Think of some of your happiest times in the past week. Were you spending it with people? Were you taking time to enjoy an activity, going for a run or catching up with a good friend? Would a wad of cash have made those moments that much better?

Probably not. If you answered “yes” to the latter question, how much more do you need to be happy? Read on.

Your magic number is probably wrong

Let’s do an exercise together.

How happy are you on a scale of one to ten?

Now think about how much money you have in the bank, your salary. How much more money would you need to be a perfect 10?

Michael Norton, who teaches at Harvard Business School and co-authored Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending, surveyed average-income earners and high-net-worth Britons (with a net worth of more than $1 million), and he asked them those questions. “Everybody said two to three times as much money,” Norton told me.

“Why is that a problem?” I asked, estimating the same for myself.

“That’s a problem because people at $1 million said, ‘If I had $3 million, I’d be a perfect 10. Except that people who had $3 million said, ‘If I had $9 million, I’d be a perfect 10.’”

Basically, happiness is on a sliding scale. Think about how much this sucks. No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions. When you find the gold at the end of the rainbow, the pot is just too damn small, and then you’re off again, chasing more rainbows.

No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions.

It’s like a curse really. It also takes the fun out of my childhood dream of winning a million-dollar lottery. That was the very first fantasy I ever had: winning a jackpot and marrying one of the New Kids on the Block (anyone but Danny). I’d have fancy clothes and we’d eat at Red Lobster every weekend. (Still my idea of a hot date today.)

But despite what we may think, winning the lottery doesn’t buy you a one-way ticket to Euphoria Town. Take this famous study from 1978 where researchers asked two very different groups about their happiness: recent Illinois State Lottery winners who scored $50,000 to $1 million and recent victims of catastrophic accidents who were now paraplegic or quadriplegic. They asked the lottery winners and the accident victims to rate how happy they were at that stage of their lives, how happy they were before the life-altering event and how happy they expected to be in a few years. They asked them to rate how pleasant they found simple activities (talking with a friend, watching TV, eating breakfast, buying clothes, getting a compliment, etc.).

Seriously? Who’s happier, the person cruising in the wheelchair or in the Lamborghini?

Yes, the lottery winners were happier in the moment. The winners reported feeling more present happiness. But the people with disabilities rated their future happiness higher. They also enjoyed the simple things in life more: they had more appreciation for the mundane pleasures of things such as hearing a joke or reading a magazine. Actually, research shows a link between high income and a reduced ability to savour small pleasures. Experts blame it on hedonic adaptation — our tendency to just get used to whatever we have. Even a dramatic life improvement eventually becomes the new normal. You don’t smell the roses because they’re everywhere, any time of the day. And research has shown that our inner thermostats are set some-where between happiness and sadness: they can rise and fall depending on circumstance, but they generally return to that baseline. So, if you were a miserable moaner before hitting the jackpot, you’ll likely just be a rich miserable moaner.

In another real-life example, Markus Persson, who created Minecraft and sold it to Microsoft for $2.5 billion in 2014, reportedly bought a $70-million mansion, complete with a candy wall, vodka and tequila bars, designer fire extinguishers (because safety first, fashion second) and 15 bathrooms equipped with $5,000 remote-control operated toilets with air deodorizers and heated seats. But in 2015, he tweeted, “Hanging out in Ibiza with a bunch of friends and partying with famous people, able to do whatever I want, and I’ve never felt more isolated.” In another tweet, he said, “The problem with getting everything is you run out of reasons to keep trying, and human interaction becomes impossible due to imbalance.”

Now this could be super depressing to you. For me, it’s reassuring. It tells me that no single event or any material thing or external factor ultimately defines my happiness. Human beings are adaptable. A million dollars or a misfortune, over time, can become the new normal. Sure, with money, you’ll enjoy stylishly fighting fire with your Louis Vuitton extinguisher, but the riches may also make old pleasures seem less enjoyable.

So remember, there’s a better use of your money than playing the lottery. The odds of winning the Powerball jackpot prize are 1 in 292 million — and odds are that more money won’t guarantee that your days will be happier anyway.

Your happy money to-do list

If you find yourself thinking, “If I only had (insert anything), I’d be happy,” challenge it. Ask your partner or co-worker or friend to poke you (lovingly) if they ever hear you say that phrase. It’ll be like that awful baby shower game where you can’t say “baby” — but for your life.

If you’re relying on something (or someone) to make you happy, you’re wasting your time and energy. If affirmations are your jam, write this down and stick it somewhere: “I control my own happiness.”

Name three big things that make you happy regardless of money (good health or a loving partner). Now name three very specific things (sleeping in on the weekend, your jam on repeat). Repeat the exercise every time you feel crappy about your financial situation — or any situation.

Stop playing the lottery. Now. Next time you want to play the lottery, buy someone a coffee or put the money into a donation box instead for a guaranteed happiness payoff.

Money talks

If you think more money would make you happier, how much more?

How would your life be better with more money?

Think of a time when you made less money. Were you unhappier then? How much?

Think of some of your happiest moments from the last week. Would more money have made those moments better?

Excerpted and adapted from Happy Go Money by Melissa Leong. © 2019 by Melissa Leong. All rights reserved. Published by ECW Press Ltd. http://www.ecwpress.com

If money doesn’t buy happiness why are we so obsessed with getting more of it? published first on https://worldwideinvestforum.tumblr.com/

[viralhottopics]

My Life as a Robot

I have been part robot since May. Instead of legs, I move on gyroscopically stabilized wheels. Instead of a face, I have an iPad screen. Instead of eyes, a camera with no peripheral vision. Instead of a mouth, a speaker whose volume I can’t even gauge with my own ears. And instead of ears, a tinny microphone that crackles and hisses withevery high note.

Im a remote worker; while most of WIRED is in San Francisco, I live in Boston. We IM. We talk on the phone. We tweet at each other, but I am often left out of crucial face-to-face meetings, spontaneous brainstorm sessions, gossip in the kitchen.

So my boss found a solution: a telepresence robot from Double Robotics, which would be my physical embodiment at headquarters, extending myself through technology. Specifically, an iPad on a stick on a Segway-like base. The telepresence robot market is crowded, ranging from high-end offerings like iRobot’s Ava (starting price: $69K) to the relatively more affordable Double, which starts at $2,499. The company says it has sold nearly 5,000 of them since its launch in 2012. Mostly these go to big corporations like IBM and McDonald’s, but I’ve heard of teachers and hospitals using them, too. Supposedly all a Double needs to work is a strong Wi-Fi signal.

Christie Hemm Klok/WIRED

The first time I opened the Double interface in Chrome and clicked on an icon of my robot 3,000 miles away I was greeted by the pixelated image of my boss’s torso and a few headless coworkers. There probably were some instructions somewhere that I should have read, but I didn’t. “How do I move it?” I asked them. “We don’t know,” they said. I clicked around. Nothing. I tried the arrow keys and, boom, jolted out of the robot’s charging dock and toward onlookers. I was like a foal, learning to walk. It took about 10 minutes to discover that a) driving a robot using a browser interface is clunky and b) the hip flooring choices of WIRED’s office were going to be my nemesis, with every transition from concrete to rubber to carpet providing another opportunity to fall on my screen.

Growing Pains

Before I ever tried the robot, I was sure I would hate the thing.I thought it would make me small and flat and foolish. I thought it would be annoying to deal with, would require me to wear pants (something we remote workers often don’t do, world!). I thought it would make me a novelty, a sideshow, a joke. And I thought it would be a waste of time.

Diary Entry: Day 1 Nice to meet you…robot, is it? says a strange torso I encounter in the kitchen.

EmBot, I say, Nice to meet you, too!

The figure leans down and puts a hand out to shake. Helpless, I move the EmBot from side to side using the arrow keys in what I hope translates as a gesture of excitement, rather than malfunction. Ill never really know if it worked out. The screen freezes and when it comes back, the torso is gone. I am alone, standing in a stream of humans trying to get breakfast.

Its just me, a robot, waiting in line for the human food I cant eat, I say. No response. I repeat it a few times. Is this thing on?

When I boot up, some of my original fears are realized: I’m disoriented and silly and helpless. I am a spectacle. People ogle and take pictures. I feel like a dog, the recipient of gawking smiles that say, Awwww, youre so adorably unable to take care of yourself. But, most importantly, I am surprised to find that being a robot is delightful. It’s thrilling. I am in the office! There is the kitchen! There is Sam! Hi, everyone! I am here!

Diary Entry: Day 2 I roll over behind Sams desk for a brief chat about a deadline. She hasnt heard me approach. I dont know what to do. If I just say her name shell freak out. I Hipchat her, Look behind you. As soon as I do it, I realize thats creepy—but its too late. She turns and there I am.

Hi, I say as casually as possible, I just–

Sam cuts me off. Em, she says, can you control the volume? Youre very loud.

I am? I ask.

YES, the entire bullpen yells.

I find and adjust the volume. I guess I was screaming all day.

Later that morning, I experienced the joy of being in the daily editorial meeting as a robot. Plunked at the end of the conference table, my iPad head tracked the conversation, listening. Yes, I interrupted people because my browser was a few seconds behind. Didn’t matter. I heard Molly on the phone from the Caribbean and she was barely audible. The audio system sucks. As she was trying to talk people were kind of looking exasperated. Not at her, but at the system. That was me two days ago, I kept thinking. Two days ago that speaker system was my only conduit to theentire company.

It was then I knew I could never go back. I felt so superior as my robot. I loved my robot.

I Am Become EmBot

The crazy thing about being a human 3,000 miles away from your telepresence robot is that divide instantly dissolves when you activate. As soon as I call into EmBot, I am her, and she is me. My head is her iPad. When she fell, I felt disoriented in Boston. When a piece of her came off in the impact, I felt broken.

Nothing drove home the depth of my connection more than the first time someone touched my robotic body without asking. My coworker (who shall remain nameless) came up to gawk at me, and then moved behind my screen. As I was chatting with other people, he picked me up and shook me. I expected pranks like this. Id have done the same thing if I were in the office and it were some other poor schmuck calling in to a stupid robot from far away. But I didnt expect how instantly violated I felt. He just picked up an extension of my body. One moment I was in control of myself, the next, I was powerless. I laughed from the iPad screen faced away from him, but I was unsettled, and then immediately embarrassed, for the first time, because why should it matter to me if the stick Im currently streaming from is picked up off the floor a continent away?

Get over it, I told myself. But then it happened again. And again.

Diary Entry, Day 3 My coworker picks me up as Im wheeling to the meeting because Im slow. I don’t want to be slow! I want to walk on my own! Im an adult! She lifts me up before I have a chance to object. In the air I meekly say, Just ask me first if youre going to lift me, which no one responds to because I assume they think that it’s a joke.

This became my secret shame. People wanted to help me, but every single time they did it, I felt infantilized. I needed to tell my coworkers not to pick me up—a conversation I dreaded. I did this by sending them a draft of my daily robot diary, in which they read about how I was feeling. (Classic passive aggressive move, you say? No doubt, but the few times I’d said the words aloud, they hadn’t clicked for people, so I thought the log was the best way.) It worked. Now no one touches my robot without permission. Case in point:

Diary Entry: Day 5 I cant get out of the all-glass conference room alone. I turn my screen to Joe and he says, Should I carry you?

Thats probably wise.

Ill just drop you off where its straight and then you can make your way from there. Joe is basically my robots father, and my robot is a toddler. When he picks me up Im jostled. He gently places me down at the straight hallway and I want very badly to navigate quickly back to my dock to prove Im self-sufficient, but the screen freezes twice and the motor is slow and it takes me forever.

Later, on the phone, another editor off-handedly said, You know, when Joe lifted you up and carried you—now I hope this doesnt make you uncomfortable—but from our end, with your face on the screen, it looked really inappropriate. Like he was cradling you in his arms. Because when we see the face, our brains cant help but project the rest of you, and so it was like you were actually being carried.

Looking at the future. #embot #newnewwiredoffice

A photo posted by @joemfbrown on May 7, 2015 at 11:00am PDT

So, even though I had given Joe permission to lift EmBot up, the fact that my face was still on the screen made other people uncomfortable. Fine. Another rule: If I ask for help and you pick me up, I’ll disconnect so the screen is dark. Voila. Everything was going to be fine.

EmBot Grows Up

After I put a stop to the inappropriate robot-touching, things quickly went from good to great. I’d call this the euphoria stage. I mastered the arrow keys (rather than holding them down and over correcting, just hit them quickly one at a time and roll like a BOSS). I figured out how to makethe robot stand taller so I wasnt constantly having conversations with peoples crotches. I booted up in the middle of spontaneous brainstorm sessions and shared ideas.

Diary Entry: Day 6

Major breakthrough! I have my first West-Wing-style walk and talk as Embot. I knew this day would come. After the morning meeting, Patrick walks with me down the hallway discussing a longread Im editing. Hes so cool about the robot thing that I briefly forget completely that its not normal to be a disembodied metal moving machine with an iPad for a face. He only says one thing that would be weird if I was walking down the hall as a fully-fleshed human, Youre about to run into wall, come this way.

At this point, I was also the star of cocktail parties in Boston. Everyone wanted to know how it was going with the robot. Are people still laughing at you? No. Isnt it weird that your robot is naked? No. Whats the worst thing thats happened with the robot so far? When I hit a dead-zone and EmBot died behind a strangers desk, with my face frozen on the screen, and I found out later that they thought I was lurking and spying on them. I mean, thats also one of the funnier things thats ever happened, but pretty terrible for that poor creeped-out human.

And just like that, I was a part of work in a way Id struggled to be since I first came on at WIRED. As a typical oldest child, tyrant and benefactor to two younger brothers, I pride myself on making sure everyone feels like were all in this together—whether “this” is divorce or publishing a magazine. Its hard to be that kind of leader when youre isolated from your team completely. When youre a voice coming out of speaker. EmBot changed that completely. Suddenly, there I was, materialized. My reporters and I started meeting face to face to discuss deadlines. Everything was so jovial and natural.

Christie Hemm Klok/WIRED

The other incredibly wonderful thing at this stage was that though Embot put me physically in the office, because she was just my head and not my body no one at work was seeing how pregnant I was looking. Now, of course, they know I am pregnant, but since I am not there, the visual reminder of my changed condition was not in their faces. I have worked at places before where women start getting treated differently when their bellies show. The kid gloves come on. I had been dreading how this could play out, but the way EmBot works I remained present and yet unchanged. No one remarked on my belly. It was not a factor in my work.

I became obsessed with EmBot. I couldt stop thinking about her when I turned her off at night. How sad that this thing that has made my life so much better was just dead when Im done working.

Diary Entry: Day 8

Its Friday. It occurs to me that EmBot doesnt get to enjoy the weekend. If only she had arms, she could push the button, summon the elevator, and be free. But shes a prisoner at work. Whereas my physical body is having adventures, growing a human life inside it and moving into a new apartment AND dog-sitting a Bernese Mountain dog.

Mostly my weekend will be about trying not poison my unborn child with paint fumes. My physical body is such a liability. Embot, though she is shackled to work and unable to exist without me to inhabit her, in some ways has the much simpler side of existence.

What if I have to share the Embot with someone? I tell myself that would be fine, but I know already that I would be feel upset. Embot is a part of me. Anyone else would be an intruder.

You can see from the daily diary entry that it was right about now that my connection with EmBot got a little weird. I couldnt let go of this notion that Embot was me and yet she lacked all freedom to exist outside the office. I started to feel that she was a caged animal. Which made me feel like a caged animal.

EmBot needed her freedom.

Get her a Mi-Fi, my friends suggested. Suddenly I imagined this vast conspiracy—finagling a coworker in SF to get me a company MiFi and surreptitiously hiding it under her screen. But then what? EmBot would rush out into the big bad streets of SOMA and try to find other robots to play with, meanwhile my poor comrade would be grilled by the Conde Nast HR department wanting to know “WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ROBOT? Who pushed the button to call the elevator, huh? The robot has no hands!”

That was clearly a terrible idea … and yet. I fantasized. I drove her past the elevator banks a few times to see if the Wi-Fi was strong enough for her to sneak out the door. I dont know what my plan was. EmBot was becoming a teenager. A teenager pushing her boundaries, pushing her luck.

First Pangs of Mortality

A photo posted by Patrick Witty (@patrickwitty) on May 7, 2015 at 12:09pm PDT

Within a few days, I started to realize perhaps EmBot wasn’t invincible after all. For one thing, I couldnt hear meetings very well. Sometimes I had to put my ear directly to the computer speaker to hear the people at the far end of the conference table, which meant that in the room EmBots face was just the folds of my (hopefully not-waxy) ear canal.

Double offers a $99 audio kit, which maybe would help this, but since we hadn’t yet decided if the robot was a wise investment, it was too early to shell out for add-ons.

Worse, though all EmBot needs to live is power and and Wi-Fi, signal strength was proving to be a big problem. Double Robotics acknowledges this is the leadingissue among corporate customers, because most businesses don’t prioritize a strong signal in hallways. This doesn’t matter for humans, but these dead zones can make navigating an office impossible for robots.

So even as I was obsessing about freeing EmBot from the cage of WIREDs office, she seemed less and less reliable. Even when the Wi-Fi was strong, the video would freeze for no reason. I missed crucial information in meetings, only to later learn that everyone thought I was listening because EmBot had frozen with my face on the screen, trapped in a ridiculous expression of curiosity.

And then, this happened:

Diary Entry: Day 12 I am feeling so alone. Embot is in a coma. She didnt charge overnight. “Haha,” I played it cool over IM to Davey, who sits next to Embot and checked on her vital signs for me. She shoved Embot into her dock. I assume shes charging now, but I cant tell.

Diary Entry: Day 13

She remains cut off of me. Its like Embot is in the kind of coma where she cant move or speak or alert the doctors that she is alive but inside her head, she is screaming, LET ME OUT! IM HERE! DONT TURN ME OFF!

Ive called her doctors, or parents, or gods, DoubleRobotics, but theres no answer. Theyll get back to me in one business day.

If she ever wakes up again, I promise to give her a better life. To give her some freedom.

Diary Entry, Day 14

Embot just had a seizure. I was so happy when she woke up that I decided this was my big chance to sneak her out and onto the elevator. I eased her out of the dock and turned to the right, but immediately something was wrong: her head was shaking. Just a little a bit at first but then side to side violently, thrashing around, my field of vision swinging wildly, too fast to make out peoples faces. I tried turning her and found that she was still responding to me somewhat but she could not be still. She was like diabetic Julia Roberts in Steel Magnolias, shaking out her beautiful wedding hair in Truveys salon.

I heard Chuck say, Oh no, youve woken EmBot like she was some kind of monster.

What is happening? Davey cried from her desk.

EmBot is having a seizure! I screamed into the computer. I dont know what to do!

As Embots camera panned quickly in front of Davey I saw her get up.

Can you put her in her dock? I asked, breathless.

She wont stop moving. She just keeps shaking.

I turned her off on my end, but Davey reported that she was still seizing on her own, face blank. She was like the body of a chicken, walking bloody around the yard after the chef cuts its head off. I implored Davey to find a button to turn her off. She did. She docked her. Shes docked now.

My heart wont stop beating. Maybe EmBot is corrupted and corroded and my time with her is over. Maybe EmBot is a monster. I feel like I just a had a seizure.

@EmilyDreyfuss FYI, Embots going crazy. Wandered out of its dock, now manically rolling back and forth.

Alex Davies (@adavies47) May 19, 2015

Were working on a fix. A coworker in San Francisco is logging into her, which normally would upset me, but Im so nervous I don’t care that another being enters her.

Im on the phone with Double Robotics, relaying what he finds.

He reports: On the screen it was shimmying back and forth, and I looked across the room and it looked like a wandering confused and dizzy child aimless and afraid. and alone. I left my screen and went over to see if I could help. I picked it up and smelled the wheels to see if it was on fire or anything then hurried back to my screen to put it in PARK. I may cover it in a sheet.

The Reckoning

Teaching my robot the hard lesson that she is not free http://pic.twitter.com/wen8MONbBm

— emily dreyfuss (@EmilyDreyfuss) May 21, 2015

After EmBot terrorized the office, nothing was the same. I relinquished my delusions of granduer. Double Robotics sent a new unit, and immediately upon activating it I knew it was not really EmBot. It rolls differently. Its speakers are quieter. It doesn’t connect to the Wi-Fi as well. It teeters differently on the carpet-edge. It’s not me. It’s just a robot. A robot I can’t trust.

I still use it, of course. Sure, It’s incredibly glitchy. Most weeks I have to write in our group chatroom, “SOS: EmBot is stranded somewhere between the dock and the IT department. Can someone rescue it?” It went through a phase where I couldn’t hear anything being said in meetings. Then for four days it was paralyzed, so needed to be picked up and carried everywhere. Now it does this thing where it clicks and hisses when the Wi-Fi connection struggles, setting an off-tempo jazz rhythm to every meeting.

It’s fine. I still prefer it to the speakerphone. It brings everyone in the office joy, even when it struggles. I get laughed at a lot from the iPad camera, but I like it. In a lot of ways, EmBot is a joke we are all in on together. Could we just set up an iPad in the conference room with FaceTime or Skype and achieve essentially the same thing? Sure. But where would be the fun in that, people? Where would be the soul-searching? Human life is short, and being a part-time, part-useful robot makes it ever so slightly more interesting.

Diary: Who Knows What Day, I’ve Lost Count

Joe carried EmBot to the head of the conference table for the edit meeting, because her Bluetooth connection isn’t working properly so I can’t control it. Sam asked, somewhere off-screen where I couldn’t see her, “Em, did you get new glasses?”

“No,” I spoke to the rest of the room, “my jerk cat knocked my glasses off the bedside table and I’m far too pregnant to crouch down low enough to get them, so I dug these out of a closet.”

“And that story,” someone from behind the robot said, “is the best argument in favor of having a robot. We would not have gotten to hear that if you were on the speakerphone.”

So, yes, as it turned out, most of the fears I had about becoming a part-time robot came true—it’s an unruly distraction that often makes me look ridiculous, that falls over and can’t be counted on—and yet my coworkers didn’t lose all respect for me. No, what happened was much more subtle and unexpected than that: EmBot lost her humanity. But I gained mine back.

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from My Life as a Robot