#i dont know anything about toothpaste or how to make it or else this post would be so fucking serious

[aropride]

going to start a company that makes prescription toothpaste and toothpastes for specific things like sensitive teeth or gum health or whatever but the catch is that i'll make them in flavors other than mint. theres no reason it has to be mint flavor

[tuliptiger]

I would love a breakdown of how it does affect us then. Because I am also with the people who vehemently hate commercials and will actively avoid using products advertised. I am tired of feeling this way and being told it's the opposite, I'm frustrated actually.

These are my honest feelings and I mean no harm to OP or the commenters. I need more than just, "you are affected" though, from a personal, emotional standpoint and as an evidence standpoint.

I don't think I'm the specialist person out there nor do I believe I am immune to propaganda, that isn't what I'm saying at least not intentionally. I need evidence why and HOW I'm not immune though, because these conversations make me feel helpless and like I'm going insane.

If my absolute disdain or my lack of any feeling at all towards a product or brand doesn't make a difference and somehow is exactly what the companies want I really need that spelled out for me man.

The only thing I know is that ads ARE effective when introducing a new product or idea to people where the company needs people to know. But this will only affect the target audience!!! The audience that was only ever going to want the new thing in the first place and that the company wanted. And I guess what I'm saying from a, "commercials don't affect me" point of view is that my target for my attention and money is so incredibly small and nigh I'd argue useless that...for a majority of advertisements yes they dont work on me.

The other thing I can think of working on people who aren't interested in the ad is that it may generate conversation. I had a perfect example of this last night with a TikTok commercial that keeps coming up. It solidified my absolute hatred and refusal to use the app but I was so mad about it I made 2 posts about it. I am acting to lengthen and spread the advertisement's lifetime and reach. I can understand that too.

I don't think ads work on me MOSTLY, I'd argue because I'm poor, but I want to be able to say it's also because I'm putting effort into enjoying what I have and taking a slower pace of life. I'm putting the effort into not buying things and getting creative with the things I do have.

I know that packaging and branding get me, I know that I will choose a toothpaste that fights cavities over whitening teeth. I know that if a commercial advertised something I was actually into I might look it up or even go buy one. And maybe this is a communication issue where I and others aren't stating exactly what we mean. Advertising doesn't advertise things we're into frequently enough or at all that, for the ads we have seen, no they don't work on us because we aren't the target audience.

I don't know what else, from the extent I've mulled things over and the time I've spent contemplating this, that's all I can think of. Is it truly just an issue of "I am immune to propaganda" that bothers people into saying, "you are not immune to propaganda" though? Or is there more??? This response with no further elaboration makes me feel a little disrespected and frustrated.

Edit: After reading the comments, which are kind of driving me insane, is that my argument is for me being unprofitable for advertisements. Which is my understanding of the whole point of ads, which makes me feel like I am immune to them. I am not buying name brand item because it was advertised to me, I may never buy the name brand anything actually. I may buy the item that's from a different brand or I may not buy that item at all ever.

Using an example in the comments, I don't understand how pizzahut advertising pizza to me and me buying a frozen pizza at safeway is related in any way shape or form. It's unprofitable for pizzahut at that point unless the argument is now "big pizza" has "its" hands in everything and just wants me to buy pizza. That makes absolutely no sense to me. Yes pizza is on my brain but pizzahut isn't, did "big pizza" pay for pizzahuts advertisement??? No.

Does seeing the pizzahut commercial make me think "man pizza sounds good haven't had that in awhile" yeah absolutely do I act on that? No or yes but it isn't for pizzahut and often times it isn't even acted on at all. Maybe I will talk to someone about pizzahut because of it and they go buy pizzahut.

Yeah ok sure, indirectly caused profit for pizzahut. Or maybe I don't talk about it at all except in this Tumblr post. And pizzahut died in obscurity in my head forever or I buy a pizzahut 5 years from now. One purchase every 5 years doesn't make a business profitable.

I just need more, I need more information than just "you are not immune to propaganda" and for now I will stop saying I am "immune" and give a little more nuance. My tone in this edited part is absolutely more frustrated and maybe harsher so I do apologize for that. I'm losing it at the arguments in the comments and the more I talk about this the more agitated I feel so I will leave it at this.

You are not immune to ads. Ads are not becoming ineffective due to oversaturation or savvy young people or whatever. Billions of dollars are poured into market research and analytics every year, corporations would know if ads were a waste of money way way before a tiktok comment section and stop spending money on them

By believing yourself to be "too smart" to be affected by advertising you're only making yourself far less mindful of and more susceptible to it. The ads you're exposed to poison your mind - be aware of that so you can combat it, and try to be exposed to as few as possible

[dehydratedpercy]

Prompt: " Please.....dont make me hurt you"

For dark Frank maybe👀 but you Can also choose someone else

A Way To Hurt (2.5k)

Read on Ao3 | Based on this post

Summary: Hazel still has Frank's firewood, though they're enemies now. Even though she knows she could kill him, she can't bring herself to betray his trust-- that is, until he shows up one night intent on getting his lifeline back, no matter the cost.

TW: Home invasion, dark themes

Hazel had just finished getting ready for bed when she heard the noise. It came from the other room, so she picked up her spatha, hoping beyond hope that it was just the old house settling.

Sometimes, it was just the old house settling. She kept her spatha by her side at all times though, because she knew one day, it wouldn’t just be the house. And she refused to be unarmed when that day finally came.

Now, she had her sword, which gave her comfort even if she wasn’t wearing armor. Her sweats were oversized, her mouth still tasting like toothpaste. Her eyes had been drooping, almost falling asleep standing up.

She wasn’t falling asleep now.

She stepped into the bedroom, pausing in the doorway. For a moment, there was nothing. Then Frank materialized, landing with barely a step. It was almost as if he'd taken off Annabeth's invisibility cap, but Hazel knew the truth; that he'd simply been in the form of a bug, and had shifted back to his human form. It was a trick he’d started learning when he was still at camp, but clearly he’d perfected it since then.

Hazel let her spatha hang by her side, not raising it quite yet. Frank wouldn’t have shown himself if he was just going to attack her, which meant he must’ve wanted to talk.

This’ll be good, she thought, crossing her arms.

“Hazel,” Frank said, sounding on edge. He looked worse than the last time she saw him, like he hadn’t been sleeping. Despite that, his posture was straight, like he hadn’t been able to forget his Roman training, his hands in his pockets casually, like he hadn’t just broken in. “You look-- good. You look good.”

It came out as a stumbled complement, but it hit Hazel like an insult. They’d broken up directly before he’d left camp, but before that they’d been dating for nearly three years. He’d never gotten less awkward. At one point, it had been endearing-- but too much had changed for it to feel like anything but an insult now. Especially since she knew why he was here.

“That attack on Camp Half-Blood. That was you, wasn’t it?”

Frank shrugged non-committally. “I wasn’t there, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“You just helped organize it.”

“Sounds like something I’d do, doesn’t it?” He said, neither agreeing or disagreeing. “Hazel--”

“And the attack on the questers? The bear--”

He huffed. “Might have just been a freak accident. Wild animals attack sometimes, Hazel.”

“Stop saying my name,” she snapped. “It’s not yours to say anymore. And that warship that was destroyed? The defenses that were destroyed? The supplies that were booby-trapped?”

Frank took a step forward, eyes darkening. He didn’t like being pushed, but Hazel didn’t care. He deserved to feel the impact of the crimes he committed-- crimes against demigods, crimes against his family. Hazel wasn’t going to let him get away so easily.

They’d initially broken up when Frank started getting too radical, claiming that they were doing something wrong by taking in and training new demigods. He said they’d be better off left alone, where they wouldn’t be able to get too powerful, and thus wouldn’t attract as many monsters. Some would die, sure-- but he thought back to his mortal days with a fondness he didn’t hold for either camp. He thought it would’ve been better not to know.

He was wrong. But that didn’t stop him. He left camp, found beings willing to support his cause, and started a gradual campaign to dissolve both camps-- make them so unsafe demigods started fleeing, trying their luck in the mortal world.

Hazel and her friends had volunteered to be the ones to take him in-- or, if that didn’t work, bring him down. This house had been their mission headquarters. It was supposed to be secure. Then again, nothing seemed to be secure these days: there was nowhere Frank had been unable to go. He could turn into a bug and fly under doors, turn into a bear and attack innocents, turn into an elephant and take down buildings. His shifting was instantaneous, making him impossible to fight: he changed form before you could land a swing.

“You act like I’m a bad guy,” Frank said, voice low and dangerous. “Like I’m not doing all of this to help people. The generation after us will thank me when they are able to live among mortals again--”

“The ones who don’t die, maybe!” Hazel said, voice raising. “And fuck the next generation, what about the ones who are alive now? The demigods who have already started exploring their powers, who can’t stay in the mortal world without detection. What about them?”

“They’re a lost cause,” Frank said, sounding deeply saddened by this. “And I am too. I know my scent is as powerful as yours or Jason’s; this fucking curse has seen to that.”

“A blessing,” Hazel corrected, feeling the familiarity of their old argument like a frequently dislocated joint. “Shapeshifting is a blessing, a gift more demigods would die for--”

“I’m barely even human anymore!” Frank yelled. Hazel stepped back in horror as he shifted rapidly, going from human to bear to hawk to wolf to human again. It happened so quickly it just looked like a flicker, and then he was human again, pinching the bridge of his nose and taking a deep breath. “Hazel, I wouldn’t wish this curse on anyone. And even if I was just a normal demigod, going to camp was the biggest mistake of my life. If I had never done that, my scent would have never gotten this strong. My family mansion would still be around, my grandmother would still be--” he swallowed with difficulty. “My grandmother would still be alive. Camp Jupiter took everything from me. And I can’t get it back, but maybe-- I could make it better for future demigods. That’s all I can hope for.”

“At the expense of demigods now,” Hazel whispered. “Frank, without the camps… so many people will die. Demigods need a safe place to train.”

Frank’s expression closed off, and Hazel knew he was done arguing with her. Early on, he’d hoped to get her to see his side, but he’d quickly seen that that would never happen.

“Fine,” he said, voice like a knife. “Then just give me what I came here for, and I’ll be on my way.”

Hazel felt her face heat up. Her hand twitched, wanting to move to touch the side of her thigh where his piece of firewood sat. All this time, and he’d never gotten it back. At first, Hazel thought it was a hopeful sign, since it meant he must still trust it in her care, but as his actions grew more and more violent, she knew it was only a matter of time.

She had used to keep it in a jacket pocket, but she wasn’t so naive anymore. Currently, the wood was duct-taped to the side of her thigh, so it never left her side. No one knew; her friends didn’t even know she had it. She’d considered telling them, but she just couldn’t betray Frank’s trust like that. She’d considered burning it-- especially after hearing about the deaths-- but in the end, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. How could she betray someone who had trusted her with everything? How could she hurt anyone like that?

Hazel had known, in her heart, that one day he’d show up, looking for the piece of timber. She had hoped it wouldn’t happen, but she’d known. She wasn’t as naive as people liked to think.

“I’m not giving you anything,” she said, raising her spatha. “For all you know, I don’t even have it anymore. I may have put it in a safe across the country, and you’ll never find it.”

“Yeah, right,” he scoffed. “Come on Hazel. Don’t make me ask again.”

“I told you not to say my name.”

“Hazel,” Frank snapped. “You’re acting like a child. I’m trying to make the world a better place, and it’s bad enough you of all people are trying to stop me. But that timber doesn’t belong to you. Give it here.”

“Do you remember who my father is?” Hazel challenged, baring her teeth. “I could kill you with the snap of my fingers. I’d be more afraid, if I were you.”

"You have my firewood, you could've killed me long ago," Frank argued. "You haven't. You're not going to try now."

Hazel felt her eyes blaze with determination. "You don't know that."

He started moving forward, and Hazel was reminded briefly how much bigger than her he was. "I do. Because I know you, and I know you'd never do anything to hurt a friend."

"Unlike some people," Hazel snarled.

Frank ignored the jab, still moving forward. “Hazel, I’m begging you, just hand it over. I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you.”

He got too close, and Hazel slashed with her sword. In an instant, he was gone, and then he was behind her, grabbing her around the waist. She screamed as he grabbed her hoodie pocket, feeling for the timber. She tried to elbow him in the face but he was gone again, and then she tripped over something and was on the ground. She swiped at him again but he was relentless, disappearing and reappearing again, attacking her like a wolf tearing at scaps. She couldn’t strike her, no matter how hard she tried.

Suddenly, she felt his hand on her thigh, and in a panic she kicked him away. He responded slower this time, barely turning into a bird in time to stop himself from slamming full force into the opposite wall. He dropped back to human form, panting, but his gaze was vicious. He’d found what he was looking for.

“You used to be a gentleman,” Hazel said bitterly as she stumbled to her feet, backing up. He had never so blatantly ignored her consent like that before, touching her like she was a means to an end instead of a person.

“I’m not going to be a gentleman when you have my lifeline tucked against your skin,” Frank said cruelly.

Hazel saw his muscles tense and just had enough time to say “No--” when he lunged, turning into a hawk. She slashed with her sword, but then he was a coyote, hitting her with so much force she fell again. There was a ripping noise, but she didn’t have time to react because then he was on top of her in human form again. They wrestled for a moment, but Hazel had never excelled in hand-to-hand combat, and he was twice her size with the upper hand. He threw her spatha to the side, then pinned her beneath him.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, then there was a hand over her mouth. She lurched, screaming into it as he ripped the duct-taped timber off her leg, taking some of her hair with it.

As a wolf, he must’ve bitten off a hunk of her sweatpants, and now he had the timber back in his hand.

He looked at it in awe, as if he wasn’t didn’t even see her as a threat anymore.

She gritted her teeth and summoned her sword. It flew so fast it knocked Frank in the back of the head, and then she was able to throw him off her body, slashing at the same time. He turned into a hawk but wasn’t quick enough, and she sliced off part of his wing. He fell, rolling away in human form, and when he came to a stop Hazel saw the huge gash down his arm. He reached up to touch it, and it was then that Hazel realized he didn’t have the wood.

She spotted it, laying in the center of the floor, at the same time as he did. They both lunged, Frank’s image flickering through half a dozen transformations before he grabbed onto the timber with his thick human hand. Hazel almost took off his fingers as she swung. Instead of knocking the wood out of his hand, however, she cut it clear in half.

That was good enough for her. She dove, grabbing the wood and rolling.

She landed in a kneeling position, half of the piece of timber in her hands. Frank held the other, teeth gritted. He looked like he planned to launch another attack, but before he could Hazel did what she should’ve done a long time ago: warping the imperial gold of her sword, turning it to its liquid state in mid-air, and using it to coat her piece of wood. She raised it, triumphant, the metal-covered wood levitating an inch above her hand. It glowed inhumanly-- after all, she had her own curses to deal with. Frank wouldn’t dare touch it now.

The house shook. It took Hazel a moment to realize that was her magic, causing the very foundations of the house to tremor. There were shouts from the lower floor, the sound of pounding footsteps.

“Try me again,” she threatened, still levitating her trophy grotesquely. “I will end you.”

Frank looked pissed, but he also must’ve seen how serious she was. He swallowed, stuffing his piece of firewood back in his pocket. “Until we meet again-- Levesque.”

Then he turned into a bat, still able to fly despite his injured wing. The door opened and he swooped out, escaping into the rest of the house and eventually, into the night.

Jason and Percy lurched in, both looking panicked. They didn’t seem to have noticed the bat. When Jason saw Hazel, his eyes widened, and he backed up into Percy, nearly knocking him over. “Hazel-- your eyes--”

Hazel realized her eyes must’ve started glowing gold, like they sometimes did when she was filled with rage. With effort, she willed them to stop, calling on the house to still.

“What happened?” Percy asked as Hazel walked to the window. She watched as a bat darted out the front door, which was still open-- Jason and Percy must’ve just gotten back. She continued watching the bat until it was too far away to see, then sighed. She willed the metal to uncover the piece of tinder, revealing it as a piece of wood again, and holding it up for them to see.

She’d never told anyone Frank’s secret, thinking her loyalty to her promise came before anything else. She didn’t think that anymore, though, and she was done doing Frank favors.

(The wood still had Frank’s blood on it, and it made Hazel’s stomach twist uncomfortably.)

“I have something to tell you guys,” Hazel said, doing an impressive job of keeping her voice from shaking. “A secret I’ve been holding for Frank for-- too long. It may not be enough to destroy him, but at the very least, I know a way where we can hurt him very, very badly.”

Send me an ask | Read "Preserve or Raze" | Check out my AO3

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveys 058.

Who was the last person you took a photo with? Was it self-taken?

uhhhhhhh i am sure it was catching a selfie with a nephew or something along those lines. definitely self taken.

Have you ever tried to learn another language? How did it go?

Yes. some are easier for me than others

When was the last time you charged your phone?

last night. It could use a boost-y charge but I dont have a portable one with me. 

So, what are your plans for the near future (a year)?

if I only knew.

Do you prefer questions about trivial things, or more deep and meaningful?

A mixture of both.

What can you hear right now? Tell me even the tiniest things.

the tv, the sound of someone eating, a faint conversation in the distance, the hum of the fan, the washing machine, a car driving by.

Where did you last ride in a car to and why?

i went sight seeing yesterday

Tell me about a person that comes to your head whose name starts with M.

maria --- gram.

Do you drink alcohol? How often?

super seldom.

Do you have any bills that need to be paid right now?

yep. tuition is just going to ram me in the booty shortly. 

Can you rap freestyle? Or at least sing raps from songs?

No, definitely not. I can rap along to some songs, but that’s it.<< same

Do you know anyone from the Philippines?

I dooo. a great professor.

What was the last type of soup you ate?

broccoli cheddar?

Are you more logical or creative, or maybe somewhere in between?

Logical 

Do you use bar soap or gel soap?

I use gel. I love the smell of bar soap though

What colour do you associate with the flavour mint?

Green. toothpaste.

When was the last time you had brunch?

uhh, I don’t know. maybe a week ago.

Does your bedroom door have a lock on it? Do you have to use it?

it has a lock. I havent had to use it for some time.

How many times a year do you travel away from home?

many, many times. I spend a lot of time traveling.

Describe your go-to outfit to me, please.

in the summer it is a pair of shorts, a tshirt, some jewelry. 

Do you like your job? Why or why not?

don’t have one at the moment.

How about your boss? What's your boss like?

--

Do you have a credit card? Do you rely on it?

I have one. I try not to, I know kile still has payment to it and it’s not his responsibility to worry about that.

Are you bitter about anything at the moment? Tell me about it.

VERY bitter that I don’t have a way to watch live olympics. just short replay recaps. It is making me beyond irate. I’m half tempted to spend 70 bucks for furbo. -.-

What colour is your bath towel?

I usually use a pink one or a brown one (its like an old horse pattern)

Who was the last person you saw a movie at the cinema with? Who paid?

my sister like 2 years ago. I think we each paid? or maybe she paid. I cannot recall.

Do you message friends and family on Facebook regularly?

No. I never even think of using fb messenger.

What is the most played song in your iTunes (or other) library?

I have no idea.

Have you ever shared a house with a significant other?

No.

Do you have a song in your head? Do you remember how it got stuck there?

not right now. I’m trying to keep it that way, thx

When was the last time you did laundry?

before I traveled. I’ll probably do some tomorrow maybe? 

Do you still have a landline phone in your home?

nope.

How are you feeling today? Happy, sad, or anything else?

well.. if you eliminate the awful summer heat and take the fact I am just dead inside without Kile, then I’m fine. I keep checking to see if hes posted anything, commented, read the chat, liked anything, messaged me, etc. Very little. I just got to let it goooooooo.

What is your favourite brand of shoes?

new balance is really comfy but im pretty flexible. 

If you smoke, what's your brand of choice?

I don’t.

Have you ever built a snowman?

many times.

Does it even snow where you live?

sure does. Quite a bit.

If you had to volunteer for a week, where would you like to volunteer?

in a childrens ward of a hospital

Who was the last person that made you upset? What did they do?

I don’t know. I think probably my neighbor. I dont need to go back into it.

Do you have a crush on anyone? Tell me about them.

I am desperately trying to not dwell on my feelings about kile. I can’t have him. He belongs to someone else. I have to move on.

Have you ever had something signed by someone famous? What and who?

yeah, football players.

What was the last thing you said aloud?

uhh “she’s crying”

[kieren-fucking-walker]

Hello! I’m excited to do this as I don’t rec much, reccing things terrifies me because I hate feeling like I’m picking/playing favourites and leaving people out, and I also am just generally bad at picking my favourites of anything because I like too many things too much. I also am very bad at bookmarking, keeping track of fics I read, and generally being able to recall the names of fics to be able to rec them. So, with all that in mind I thought I’d start with something easy, on the understanding that this isn’t by any means an exhaustive list and I’d be more comfortable with this being “ten fics I like” rather than a top ten because there are far far too many fics I love in this fandom to ever do a list of favourites. So, in no particular order: 

Ten fics under ten thousand words (that I love):

Hypocrite by Lynds [@gold-from-straw​] - Rating: G, WC: 1.6k, Pairing: N/A

Summary: How can Todd possibly expect to be forgiven if he still can't forgive everyone who hurt him? Why I love it: This is one of my favourite explorations of a very specific part of Todd’s character, and it’s worth noting that the characteristics are spot on. I come back to this fic over and over again, and while in many ways it’s painful it’s also real and honest and just a beautiful bit of writing concerning Todd and his guilt.

Dork Greatly's Holistic Laundry Service by obscureenthusiast -  Rating: G, WC: 2.8k, Pairing: Brotzly (kind of)

Summary: Dirk very generously offers to help Todd with his household chores... an offer which Todd eventually takes him up on. The laundry gets a little out of hand when Todd remembers a game he and Amanda used to play and Dirk enthusiastically joins.

Why I love it: Cute!! It’s cute silly fun of these two bonding over laundry and sock puppets, gentle ribbing and acting like children. It gets even better when Farah joins in, I’m a sucker for those three being dorks together. 

My Mind Is My Own Worst Enemy; It Keeps Trying To Convince Me That You Are by DontOffendTheBees [@dont-offend-the-bees​​​]  -  Rating: T, WC: 1.6k, Pairing: Brotzly

Summary: His voice is so familiar and yet also just so… wrong. There’s something missing in it. Some vital aspect of Todd that Dirk didn’t even notice until it was gone.

Why I love it: ANGST! This appeals to every single one of my angst tendencies, and as I’m using this rec list to rec things I love I have to give a shoutout to the most wonderfully angsty fic I’ve read. I love this fic. I love the premise, I love the tension, I love the way it’s written, I love how awful the situation is. I love the way this fic is resolved, I love that it’s plausible, realistic in that. It’s incredibly emotional in all the worst ways and that makes it one of my favourite short fics ever.

Cut To The Feeling by zaphodthebb -  Rating: G, WC: 2.1k, Pairing: Brotzly 

Summary: Post Blackwing rescue, Todd is awake and on guard duty. He's had too much coffee. Also, Dirk can't sleep.

Why I love it: I’m such a sucker for post-big-things fic and this one nails the feeling perfectly. You can feel the exhaustion, the way smaller things they didn’t have time to worry about before catching up to them now they can stop for a moment. Both Dirk and Todd feel tired and real and it’s just a lovely read. 

split the secret up by piggy09 [@sharkodactyl] -  Rating: T, WC: 5.1k, Pairing: N/A

Summary: He asks if Dirk can hear it and Dirk just laughs, the sound reassuringly human.Well, not reassuringly. Reassuringly would mean Todd had to be reassured.It’s just – it sounds human. Which is good. Because Dirk is human. Definitely

Why I love it: Why don’t I love it? The idea of the Blackwing subjects being Eldritch in some way is a concept I’ve explored numerous times because it appeals to me so much, and if it appeals to you then you want to read this fic. It’s eerie and unsettling, the ability to hit the tone of not-quite-right is perfect, the pacing is astounding and it’s so hard to write a fic like this and keep the idea together as well as it’s done here. I love experimental styles of writing and when they turn out like this it’s not hard to see why. I love this fic a lot. (I would also recommend reading on desktop not mobile because the formatting of this fic adds so much to it!)

Catharsis by ben8615  -  Rating: T, WC: 1.3k, Pairing: Brotzly

Summary: Dirk is broken as heck, so why not have him cry it out? That's it. That's the whole story. You can all go home now.

Why I love it: The title and summary say it all really! This is such a lovely little fic about Dirk getting some catharsis in a way we all know he desperately needs, and paired with Todd taking care of him so gently? It’s such a perfect, wonderful little fic that just feels quiet and safe and wonderful.

objects in mirror may be closer than they appear by sharlook [@aceabed]  -  Rating: T, WC: 8.8k, Pairing: Brotzly

Summary: You’re alone, with your arms wrapped tight around a pillow at god knows what time in the night, and there are tears running down your face because you can’t seem to stop thinking about it, not even in your dreams. And then clutching your covers you get an idea. (In which Dirk has nightmares about Blackwing, goes to Todd for help, and is really, really, really in love.)

Why I love it: This fic aches in such a beautiful way. It doesn’t shy away from the ramifications of what Dirk went through and how that plays out for him, his fears and paranoias feel real and present in a way I really appreciate. The choice to use second person is a really good one, it’s a tricky pov to pull off but this definitely gets it right and is better for it. The development of Dirk and Todd’s relationship, particularly looking at Todd’s reactions to Dirk’s worries through Dirk’s eyes is just wonderful and it’s well worth a read. 

Those Grey Days by TheRoyalPrussianArmy [@theroyalprussianarmy​]  -  Rating: G, WC: 2.4k, Pairing: Brotzly

Summary: The bad days weren't always days. They could creep up, like some small, silent predator and deliver a swift bite that poisoned its victim's outlook. A blue sky could turn into grey one heartbeat after a laugh. The gentle sound of the wind in the trees would suddenly become overwhelmingly irritating. Even so much as a door closing or footsteps across the floor could lead to a strong desire to cry and scream, to rage and throw things. They would always pass, of course, but in the moment they were devastating.

Why I love it: We all know I love a good Todd characterisation, and I love a good exploration of the shitty realities of bad mental health and letting other people help you with that. I really really love this fic for both of those reasons, it’s unflinching without being gratuitous, and I really love the way it doesn’t promise sudden miraculous recovery at the hands of someone else, but ends on a gentler kind of promise of having people be there for you if you let them be. Also I’m a huge fan of the way this is written, it reads so nicely and it’s more than worth it. 

Light Work by  juniper_and_lamplight  [@juniper-and-lamplight​​​​]  -  Rating: T, WC: 2.8k, Pairing: Farina

Summary: Tina had, with her typical blunt insight, poked at Farah’s motivations for baking the cake herself. “Is it some kind of control-freaky thing? Like you can’t trust anyone else to get it right?” And while Farah couldn’t honestly say no to that question, her real motivation ran deeper.

Why I love it: This fic is wonderful. I always think we need more Farah insights, and this fic does just that in such a beautiful way, catching on her idiosyncrasies and the character building is to die for. It’s such a simple idea and yet the story itself manages to be rich and full, the imagery is simply gorgeous and every little snippet of a look into Farah’s life as it was in the past and is right now just delights me. Honestly this fic will leave you with a sweet, warm feeling all the way down to your toes and dwelling in the comfort of knowing Farah is loved by herself and others in all the ways she deserves.

or make a home by reptilianraven [@actualbird​​]  -  Rating: T, WC: 6.6k, Pairing: Brotzly

Summary: “Perhaps,” Dirk says in his best ‘yes, I’m bullshitting you, but I’m your boyfriend and you love me still’ voice. “The universe wants it this way.”“The universe wants you to always forget to put the cap back on the toothpaste,” Todd says, unimpressed, screwing the cap on himself.-Or Todd’s adventures in dating Dirk Gently, the mundanities of which unsurprisingly turning out to not be very mundane at all (featuring, among other things: intergalactic wormholes, regular periods of lying down on the floor, and several annoying habits that concern toothpaste and toothbrushes.)

Why I love it: You know those fics you read that make you want to throw your face into a pillow and scream with emotions? Yeah. This fic is so ridiculously good. The beauty of mundane daily rituals that make up part of a relationship! The way those things grow together, evolving into each others spaces and lives, this fic explores that so well. The portrayal of their relationship is so soft and tender, so happy and bright and silly and sad and everything a relationship should be. Honestly I can’t overstate enough how much I love this fic, I can’t go on and on here, but I’m about 99% sure this fic invented love-in-small-spaces kinda way. Also, sidetracking from all my other comments, if you like Mika’s song Tiny Love and the reprise of it then you’ll love this fic because I listened to it and immediately thought of it. Beautiful, emotional, fic. If this fic was a blanket I’d burrito myself in it and never leave. 

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There we go! I obviously have far more than ten fics that fall into this category and hopefully more of them will be cropping up over the course of this week if I can find the time to make that happen, but as this is something I’m lowkey scared of doing I’m pleased enough to have this much! Thank you so much to @dghdafeedbackfest​ for organising this!

If you read any of these fics and like them please let the author know! Also check out some of their other stuff, because a lot of these authors are writers I love in general! 

[magistertheos]

Random survey I found.

Was your childhood wasted by something?

No, not really. I feel like I may have squandered my early adulthood through lack of motivation and feeling stuck though.

Would you rather die during an adventure or die like a normal person?

* Like a normal person for sure. Like, I sometimes enjoy reading about explorers and their quest for the North West Passage, or ascending Everest, or what have you. And there is a certain bit of romanticism with those that die in the endeavors. But on the whole I'd much rather die in a more mundane way.

Have your parents ever put you on a diet?

* No, but I need to put myself on a diet.

Have your parents ever tried to commit suicide?

* Actually tried, not as far as I know. My mom has been suicidal in the past though due to grief after my grandma passed away.

Do you have a gag reflex?

* Yes. It can make taking pills difficult sometimes, and if I go too far back with the toothbrush it can trigger it.

Do you ever fantasize about trying drugs?

* I wouldn't say fantasize really, but I have been curious about pot. I've heard from some friends that it's super relaxing and calming, and there have been times I've been super stressed and really thought that sounded good. And if I'm being blunt and honest, another friend of mine once told me that sex while high was amazing, and ever since she told me that I've been intrigued.

Have you ever put gum in someone's hair?

* Not as far as I can remember.

Would you rather have sex before you're married or wait till marriage?

* I've already had sex before being married. Whenever I get into another relationship I'll probably have sex before again too, provided she was cool with it.

Have you ever not gone to school, just because?

* Yep.

Do you know anyone who can play the bagpipes?

* I dont, but I'd like to be that person.

Have you ever let someone hit you?

* No.

Do you own a hand warmer?

* Unless gloves count, no.

Do you have friends in other states/countries?

* Yep, my one of my best friends lives in Texas.

Do you ever pay attention during church?

* I haven't gone regularly in long, long time. But when I did go, I paid attention to the sermon.

Do you have self control?

* Far less than I'd like. This is something I'd like to work on for myself.

Have you ever broke a window?

* Accidentally when I was little. My brother and I were pressing against the living room window trying to get a good look at mourning doves outside, and we put a big ol crack in it. Our mom heard it from upstairs in the tub and wanted to know what was going on. We cleverly told her nothing, and everything was ok. When she came downstairs later everything was indeed not ok, and our very clever ruse of pretending nothing happened was over, haha.

When was the last time you freaked someone out?

* I'm not sure.

Have you ever gone on a date with a weirdo?

* I don't think so.

Who's the last person you called a bitch?

* Probably some random car that was driving like an idiot that I encountered.

Do you drink kool-aid?

* I did when I was younger, and my ex made it from time to time.

Have you ever dropped something hot on your foot?

* Maybe when cooking.

Do you watch porn?

* Yes.

Have you ever missed someone you hated?

* No I haven't.

Is anyone in your family disabled?

* My dad is on disability because of his back, because he slipped and fell and hurt himself on the job which screwed up his back.

What do you want for Christmas?

* Books are always a safe bet, or money.

How many moles do you have?

* I'm not sure?

Do you make your bed everyday?

* Haha, no.

Do you know how to ride a bike?

* It's been eons since I have, but I did, so I suppose I do.

Do you own any comic books?

* No, I've never really been a comic book person.

What is the nastiest dare you have ever committed?

* I'm pretty lame so I don't know if I have anything really for this.

Do you know anyone who has been raped?

* I was about to say no, but actually yes I do.

Are you an atheist?

* No I'm a Christian.

Have you ever owned a goldfish?

* No.

Who was the last person to call you beautiful?

* Probably my mom at her wedding this past weekend because I was in a three piece suit. Barring that I think @ambivertomnivore may have at another friend's wedding we went to together where I was also in a suit.

How many times have you been stung by a bee?

* An actual bee? Maybe once when I was really young. If we're including flying asshole wasps maybe like 7 times.

What was the last flavor of gum you chewed?

* Peppermint.

When was the last time you used tape?

* July when decorating the office for a beach theme.

When was the last time you said fuck?

* While filling this out because my cursor keeps jumping to the bottom of the post as I'm trying to switch between questions.

Have you ever stolen something?

* Toothpaste on Christmas Eve. It was totally an accident. I was doing my normal shopping for the pay period, and it was a madhouse at the market, and they shut down self checkout for some awful reason funneling everyone into just a few lines, and the guy in front of me was sketchy as all heck and probably high. And he did straight up steal on purpose and tried to used a (probably) stolen card.

What's the last movie you watched?

* Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Who's the last person you watched a movie with?

* @ambivertomnivore

Where were you yesterday at 5 PM?

* At home.

Who would you like to kiss right now?

* The sandman so I could fall asleep.

When was the last time you had tic tacs?

* I can't remember, it's been so long. If I'm getting something like that I'm getting Altoids.

When was the last time you ate chicken?

* Saturday night.

Who was the last person you told to 'Shut the fuck up' to?

* I don't think I've ever told someone that in those words. I've told my brother to shut up, but never shut the f up

Why were you last nervous?

* Probably Saturday at the wedding, meeting a lot of new people for the first time.

Whose pants did you last take off?

* My own. I haven't taken or helped take anyone else's pants off for like a year and a half. Which is on the one hand a huge bummer, but on the other hand not as big of a deal to me most of the time.

When was the last time you were disturbed?

* This past weekend. I just didn't feel well most of it.

Why did you last feel awkward?

* The wedding Saturday. I'm pretty shy, and can have a hard time hearing in an atmosphere where it's enclosed with music playing.

When was the last time you got in a fight with your best friend?

* I can't specifically remember but probably recently'ish with my brother.

Have you ever asked someone for a tampon?

* I haven't. I don't need those, and my ex was pretty prepared for her period so I never had to go asking for her.

What was the last book you read?

* Your Maryland by Rick Cottom that @ambivertomnivore got me for my birthday.

Who was the last person you read a book to?

* My mom tried to get my brother and I to read The Hobbit to her back in middle school and I think that would have to be it.

Who is the person you say the most naughtiest things to?

* If you're talking dirty talk/sexting then I don't. If you're talking about being open and unfiltered (about anything) then probably @ambivertomnivore .

Who was the last person to send you a letter?

* @ambivertomnivore though it was a birthday card given in person.

How do you feel about war?

* It's complicated. War for war's sake is really dumb, to put it mildly. But sometimes there just isn't another way. Countries tried to negotiate with Hitler for a few years to no avail, until they had had enough and declared war. I love history, and I enjoy military history. I also can get dazzled by the glory of it, the shining sabres, the smart uniforms, the flowing banners - to wax poetic; but the reality of it is that war is hell. For those who serve, and for the innocent civilians caught up in the war zone. And it should be avoided at all costs, for many reasons. But the fact remains that sometimes it is necessary.

Do you like cupcakes or muffins more?

* That's a painful choice! I'm going to say muffins because they don't have icing to get caught in my mustache.

Have you ever pushed someone on purpose?

* My brother while fighting some years ago.

Have you ever slapped someone in the face?

* I don't think so.

[screenwritingdyke]

Hey! Hum not very original but Sterek. Or Steter? Whatever you prefer :) Also I loved the two others you made with Thiam and Stiles/Jackson, I didn't think about even shipping Stackson until I read your post. :p

thanks!!  thats awesome!  i love introducing people to stackson :’) theyre one of my favorite teen wolf ships :’)

who said i love you first? hm i think maybe stiles and i think that because i feel like he’d try to hold off on saying it first because he doesnt want derek to feel rushed into anything and ultimately push him away, but another part of him just needs derek to know that he cares about him and is serious about him so he says it one night when theyre laying bed, maybe watching tv or reading books, and he kinda just rolls onto his side and wraps his arm around Derek and just says it.  he ends up kinda rambling about how derek doesnt have to say it back and how he just wanted him to know he loves him and derek looks kind of shocked and confused but interrupts him and says it backwho laughs when the other trips? look….derek doesnt trip a lot but when he does you can bet that stiles chuckles and gives him a shit eating grin as he helps him back upwho pays the bills? i feel like derek probably just assumes that this is his job but stiles will usually sit down with him and they end up making a calendar of when each bill is duewhich one makes a bigger deal around the holidays? derek! he hasnt properly celebrated a holiday in years so once he and stiles are finally together he helps cook as much as he can during thanksgiving at the sheriffs house and he decorates the loft for halloween and when christmas rolls around he and stiles go christmas tree shopping and buy the prettiest tree they can find and one year they end up hosting a really great new years eve party!who’s more clumsy? stiles is, much to dereks amusementwho checks their daily horoscope? derek! he doesnt totally believe it, but its something he always did with his siblings and its just a habit nowwho sings louder in the car? stiles likes to obnoxiously sing in the car for dereks amusementwho leaves the cap off the toothpaste? tbh i dont see either of them doing this lolwho is more up to date in pop culture? typically stiles is, but derek sort of is too because stiles will keep him up to datewho insists on going to see the newest movies? stiles!  derek doesnt really feel a need to see a new movie during its first couple weeks out, but if he knows its a movie stiles really wants to see he’ll surprise him with opening night ticketswho cries when the abused animal commercials come on? derek :( but stiles always scrambles to the tv to turn it off or change the channelwho’s the lighter sleeper? i feel like both of them are, they both have nightmares and dereks still working through the ptsd from the fire and stiles has his own baggage, but sleeping next to each other helps a lotwho believes in ghosts? both of them!  tbh they probably kinda go ghost hunting sometimes or theyll spend the night in a haunted place just to see what will happen (stiles’ idea)who does the grocery shopping? derek actually really enjoys grocery shopping but stiles usually goes with him because its something they just kinda enjoy doing together, its a nice normal thing to do and lord knows they could use some normalcy in their liveswho updates their facebook status more often? probably stiles, i think derek mostly just uses his to see what everyone else is up to and to like stiles’ profile pictures

thanks for the ask!send me a ship

[justarturo]

Farewell to the first man I truly loved.

Sometime ago, 5 years or so, I started an internship in the HR deparment in a globally known toothpaste company. It was my first job ever and as an anxious person it was really challenging for me to adapt and evolve at the begining of this trip. However I was blessed with 3 wonderful people. People who I love so much until today.

My boss, an estoic, serious, but loving man; his best friend, a fierce, powerful, stubborn woman who craved love and understanding from others, and their other best friend. A childish, kind of goofy, confident man. They were 47, 48 and 33 years old respectively, I was 20. Huge age gap, however we became truly good friends.

My boss, who I will refer as J, was my role model, we clicked on immediately and worked as perfect as any of those swiss clocks they mention in movies. We were an odd pairing. I was a hardworking, anxious, emotionally vulnerable young man, he was an emotionally distant, kind of lax and lazy adult, however as the only members of our team, we delivered some of the best results the area had gotten in years. We were truly a team, and thats how we became friends, and in some way our relationship evolved in work father-work son.

My female friend, who I will refer as Y. Was my confident and ally inside the HR department. She was the administrative assistant and I, as the HR intern, had to work very close to her. We shared secrets, gossip, defend each other in the line of duty and gave each other strength. And up to today, I can tell you with certainty we still do.

My other friend, whose name is V, was introduced to me by the other two people mentioned. At first he didn’t belong to HR but to Supply Chain, however he welcomed me to the company as if he had already known each other for years. I was dazzled by him. His personality, although a little childish, was confident and secure and that truly did a number in me. I decided We should become friends, no, best friends, no, the best of best friends. He was not shy, he was not quiet, he was everything I was not. As he wasn’t in the HR department, it took me a little longer to get to know him better, but after a couple of months, we started to become best buds. And with the company of Y and J, I felt as if I had belonged, not only to the company, but to the group since forever. Truly one of the happiest times of my life.

When I was with V, we laughed, helped each other, we cried, we talked honestly (or so I thought) we shared meals, even when we kind of argue, we would shake it off in no time. Now i know I loved him, I still do, at least the first facet of him I knew.

At the time I had not even came to terms with mt sexual orientation, and I did not consider myself a gay man. Buried deep inside my unconscious I knew I liked men, however this had been a personal struggle I had chosen to repress since I was 17. But when I was with V I did not even had to try to come to terms I was just happy to be close to this awesome man i admire so much and be good friends to each other. I was so happy when he told me his wife was pregnant. I truly was excited, he desired so much to become a father that when that wish started to become reality I was so happy for him. I met his wife at his birthday and loved her, I even remember thinking! OMG she is so nice and smart, we have so many thins in common. Now I dont know if thats good or not. U decide.

For almost two years I was the happiest and most hardworking boy inside the company, but then my worst nightmare came to life, I was moved from HR to Customer Development (Sales) deparment. I was crushed. I missed being J’s right hand, my job, my tasks, my projects, etc. J, Y and V were still my friends but I felts as if something had been ripped from my heart. I got depressed and anxious, I had at least one Panic attack per day, followed by several deppresion episodes, in which I would cry inside a meeting room, hidden frim everyone else. J and Y were so supportive and understanding, they even cried with me. But V was not. He could not empathize with couldn’t or wouldn’t. He claimed that everything was fine and I should be thankful and shake those concerns of mine off of me. He tried to make me happy with presents and meals, but I was truly truly sad. The thing that upset me the most was that a few days before my “promotion” he attended my college graduation with Y. He was so happy for me, he hugged me so hard and I remember hugging him so hard too. I felt so safe. He even bought me an Apple Watch as graduation present. He spent at least 10 Thousand mexican pesos, which is not cheap, to buy me that present. To be fair, his family is loaded, but still, its a lot, he could have simply bought me dinner or some clothes, but he decided to buy me the recently announced Apple Watch. I still have it btw, I treasure it as the last piece of our relationship.

After I was promted everything went spyralling, and we kinda grew apart. He tried to make me happy but failed to acknowledge my pain, I refused to let him try to make me forget and move on, and failed to acknowledge his attempts of helping me. We started to argue more and more often about stupid shit. Truly. We are both, prideful stubborn guys. And that really started to mess up our friendship. At the time I started to notice this very attractive lad in the Marketing deparment named F. I was truly infatuated by his appereance. He was truly a 9 in the hotness meter, and decided to get closer to him. Opened up about my orientation to two other friends outside the company, but decided to keep it hidden from J, Y and V, and truly anyone else. I asked this guy out even tho I knew he was in a relatonship at the time. Luckily for me, he was an asshole, so I just moved on. Soon I decided to quit the company as I was truly and deeply depressed. J and Y although sad, were supportive, but V was truly not. He got mad, we argued several days in a row, he said I was being stupid and a lot more shit. The week before my departure, we had came to terms, or so it seemed and chatting it slipped that I liked the F dude and that I had asked him out. Shockingly for me, he was TRULY supportive, he said that it was ok, that There was not anything wrong with me and he was glad I’d told him. It shocked me because he came from a very traditional catholic family, who usually mock gay, women, etc. You know.... catholics.... anyway. I thought this would help us to still be close or even closer after I left the company. However it did not change the fact we grew apart

After I left V started to avoid long whatsapp conversations, long phonecalls, dinner plans with Y, J and me, and if he accepted to attend, he would usually be quite passive agressive and throwing shade to my decisions and current life outside the company. As I was depressed I did not even fight against or for him. I just let it go until One day In a casual conversation he said “i was sad, but now I’m over you”. It hit me like a bomb. First this comment made me realize how much I loved him, truly, and discover how much I craved him in my life. Not only as my friend, but as a man in my life. Second it deeply saddened me to discover this as he hAd discovered he was no longer interested in having a deep connection with me. It was then I knew we were like a couple. An emotionally built couple. We had built a relationship between him and me that was as intense and meaningful as any of my other friends with their respective partners. There was nothing sexual about it, at least not consciously, but we loved each other. Sadly, it was not an authentic love, it was a possesive selfish kind of love.

Nowadays we talk twice a year top. Sometimes I miss him more, some other times I’m able just to remember to what once was and what could have been without hurting much, as I have evolved now to a more mature and empowered paychologist with a clear pad for my personal and professional life. I do not regret leaving the company, I only regret that we could never speak up and open up and letting him now I wasn’t quitting on him. Maybe it could have been different if I had. Nowadays, I’m somewhat afraid to let people in and to try to build and seek for a relationship with other man, because it truly hurts looking back. And hopefully writing about this will help me give closure to the V & A never happened relationship and ruined friendship.

I loved him. I think I still do, but I love myself more.

Ps. Forget my spelling and grammar as the post advances, My eyes were a little watery when I got deeper into my memories.

[perfectionistincrisis]

Longest post ever. Keep Scrolling! Look away!

About my brother leaving. Now there are two sides to it. One is how he is so young & he will move so far away & has to take care of everything. He has to study first of all, which is the main thing. And this in itself is a whole new experience. Starting university & facing all the pressure & tight schedule & deadlines that come with it. And to top that all, he will move to a new country. An entirely new place he has never been to & one which is very very very different from the country where he was born & raised & literally spent entire 18 years of his life in. Now whether this is the lifestyle & culture & religion we are talking about, or just the weather. You name it, & it's something different he has to face. Let's go back to studies. The ‘studies’ part, is totally acceptable! I mean it's his responsibility. No one will or is expected to do it or help him with it. This is totally on him. He has to figure it out himself. If he needs help, he needs to look for it. If he has a problem he needs to find a way out, or deal with it. The idea of having an elder sibling or family to help you with your studies, i believe, is totally absurd when someone is moving to university. At school, it might be ok but when someone is starting uni, cmon, I think it's time to stop already. Let them grow up on their own. You can't be wiping their ass for them their entire life. Not to mention, everyone has their own share of responsibilities, their own affairs to handle. Everyone of us are struggling everyday, to build our futures. And NO. This is not selfish. This is our responsibility towards ourselves. We owe this to ourselves, and no, you are not in any way, supposed to expect anyone to actually help you deal with your responsibilities in life. So with you share of duties, is it really selfish to focus on your affairs & prioritize them? & also what good will you be really doing by helping someone? How much of someone else's responsibilities can you own? There will come a point where you’ll have to leave them on their own except that now you've already spoiled them and they'll be more lost than ever. So yeah, plus i'm not even studying engineering so anyways i couldn't do much or anything at all but even if i could have, i really never liked the whole concept of doing it in ‘uni’. I have such a strong opinion about it seeing my cousins and other people. Meaning, it's not just me randomly thinking about it and commenting but i rather did always have such an opinion about this matter. So yeah that's the only ‘okay’ thing! From now, things are changing. Now, let's talk about the end of everyday! When he comes ‘home’/ dorm room. He doesn't come home to anyone. Whether it is your siblings being lame and stupid, or your parents being in a fight, or some really good day where everyone's happy and laughing - you're not getting any of it. Is anyone bringing you food? Cooking for you exactly what you eat? No. When are you going to bed? No one cares other than you. Who’s making sure you wake up and don't miss class in the morning? Who’s making you breakfast? Filling your water flask? You buy your food if you have time before class. Such a good day, just 3 classes and you're home by 11. Who do you go home to? Yourself. Weekends? .. Nvm But we are only trying to provide the best future for him. And i can NOT disagree to this at all. Not even for a second. Since almost a year, my dad & my mom has thought of everything & every tiny thing that we will need for him. Whether it is the fact that winter clothes are sold in shops during winter and winter in ksa was 6 months ago, so keeping that in mind and shopping for him things which is just too hard to get in the shops right now cause it's totally summer rn over here! Or whether it is something more serious like meeting all the different formalities to apply for a visa. And shopping for him all these months. Making lists of everything he might need. Things like plate, glass, things like rugs, things like brush, toothpaste, things like pillows, bed sheet, things like laundry basket, warm gloves, things like rain coat. Like you name it, and it somehow is something he actually needs. Also, we are so concerned about providing him the best. I think all my life, a part of shopping included looking at the price tag and seeing if its a good bargain. But now, suddenly thats not done anymore. Anything he touches (which is very little btw) & anything we choose for him (which is like every single thing we see), its just getting the best for him. Its like theres this thing in our heads. Like this is it. My brother hardly gets anything for himself. He is kind of different. So we are just getting him all these stuff because once he goes there, he might not get it for himself. And even if he does, us getting something for him now will be the last time we are doing so. Cause from now on he'll do his stuff himself. So like i was saying. We are only trying to provide the best future for him. And i can NOT disagree to this at all. Not even for a second. And this is a stage that comes in everyone's life & we can not and should not run from it. This is the right thing to do in my brother’s case. Everything till now has gone so smoothly Alhamdulillah. But it still doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. Especially when i think of my mom. I get the whole idea of how it's the hardest on the moms. In fact i have even witnessed many moms crying & breaking when their kids had to leave and all. But. This is different. I am talking about ‘my mom’. I respect all mother’s love, i do. But about my mom; unless you live under the same roof as her, you will find it impossible to believe how much of her heart & soul & energy she invests on our family. For which, I will be forever grateful & will consider myself blessed. I will never be able to start and finish talking about her but let me mention some interesting stuff! Let's start with me! So im 21. And i don't do my laundry (none of it at all), i don't vacuum (the house or even just my room), I don't iron my clothes (never did), I don't clean the dishes (not even my own plate or glass or water flask), I don't clean my room (the furnitures & stuff) & interestingly, i don't even know how to make tea or coffee (unless it's those sachets you get, but i just use them at uni). TADA - Mom does all of that for me. I don't remember the last time i did ‘any’ of the things i mentioned. I can't say i never did any of them though, but it was only for one of the 2 reasons: 1. I was younger and mom got angry with me maybe & she’d punish me by making me do it OR 2. I voluntarily offered maybe cause it was vacation and i wasn't lazy & stuff (btw this vacation, i'm totally lazy, i never offered or did anything) So like i said, i don't remember the last time i did any of it. Infact, to TOP ALL THAT, mom makes sure of all my ‘excess’ needs too. She pays so much importance to them. Like, my diet. Diet - meaning the food i eat. Now regardless of whether im trying to lose weight or not, i totally dont like asian food, more specifically, all the daily food cooked in a bengali household. I dont like ‘curries’. I prefer ‘dry’ food. It doesnt matter what it is. Chicken, beef or veggie. If its a ‘curry’, im not putting it in my mouth. Curry meaning the whole making it liquidy with all masala & stuff. And i ‘especially’ hate chicken curry. I also dont honestly remember the last time i ate it. And i am NOT exaggerating but i stopped eating it like way back in grade 11 or 12. By chicken curry, i mean the MOST REGULAR meal in almost every bengali household, more like an EVERYDAY meal especially for the kids. And it works for my bros too lol. But no way on hell im eating it. The reason is, this is one food ive been eating since i learned to ear and then after around a pretty 13 to 14 years of eating chicken curry i had to say NO one fine day xD xD Ok now i have 2 phases: one is the normal daily phase where unis going on and i'm stressed and all i eat is junk food, or maybe something not junk but has to be all delicious or maybe sometimes i'll consider eating healthy and want some classy salad and stuff. Mom always has to prepare a different meal or me. Then she has to prepare something else for her and dad too cause chicken is kids stuff and also mom does not eat chicken at all if she is the one who cooked it so yeah. And then there's chicken for my bros xD On top of that, when im in the other phase where im trying to lose weight - Oh god. The whole menu of food changes. All green veggies and salads and stuff. All grilled chicken, grilled fish, grilled beef. She does all of that. Also. she THEN ‘decorates’ my food cause she knows i love taking pictures of my food. She decorates my food. She makes sure I like the plate on which she is serving the food; whether the plate will look good in the picture. She makes sure I get to take a perfect picture. If she gets confused about how to decorate something, she'll tell me to do it and ask me what i need. I mean man, who does that to a 21 year old???? I know i am spoiled! Now ^ i got carried away! All that is a small gesture of what my mom does for ‘me’. And i'm like her eldest kid. Like she actually thinks i can take care of myself ‘more than my brothers can’ Yeah do you see where i'm going with this? You can not imagine HOW much more she does for my bros, like ‘woahhhh’👌 I’ll just give one example for each bro. My elder bro - he never actually had to open his closet and decide on which dress to wear till now in his life!!!!! Yesss!!!!! Mom even takes out his clothes. Clothes. Every garment :):):) and keeps it ready for him to wear every time he showers, or changes, or goes outside :) and that's the one who’s already 18 and moving soon! And my younger bro - well he is kinda different. Like he is all concerned about his looks and he demands on choosing his own clothes from his closet and wearing them xD xD but then mom still feeds him lunch and dinner most of the day and he is almost 14 :):):) So yes. Idk how my mom is going to handle it. But what i know is that she is such a brave and strong and intelligent and amazing woman mashAllah. She is so hard-working & she puts aside all her sickness and pain & prioritises our needs, and our wants, even if theyre really stupid. And she means the world to me. And she is my number 1 person. And I can give up anything for her. Words cannot express how much she means to me. I once had to stay a night away from her during the 1st week of my uni in 1st year of med school. That was the night I actually realized how important she was to me. I was away from her and due to some circumstance I couldn't communicate with her. That whole night, i lied in bed crying & asking Allah to let me meet my mom in my dreams as I fall asleep now… Idk if I ever told that to anyone before, but yeah here it is. Ahhhh. God!!!!! Such a huge post wth man )@+%;’!(%)#!%(£))@!%!%) but Ughhhh I just needed to get it all out of my system! Hmphhh

[yanderewatch]

but like imagine junkrat, zarya, and mccree, pining after somebody who is literally perfect in their eyes, like they dont think theyll ever get together cause theyre not in their leuge, they still stalk then and pine after them of course, but imagine their surprise when this god/goddess in their eyes kisses them!

(Admin A here, sorry if these suck or don’t really feel that yandere. Though they are really fluffy :3 Anyways, We have finished up what we have left and we did rush them so sorry if they’re bad. I feel I did a bad job on this one so if so I’m sorry but I hope you can enjoy it nevertheless. I do feel that this one was hard to make yandere, it took more of a stalker specifications which made it hard for me to be more creative. For future ref please make your ask as yandere as possible and don’t set to many limitations on them cause it makes it harder on us. After this is posted the box will be open so send in as many as you want.)

Junkrat:

♡ At first site Junkrat knew he was in love. All it took was for their eyes to meet his and in that moment he felt his heart flutter. He had never laid eyes on someone so perfect before, never had anyone spark this type of kind of emotion in him before.

♡ He found his thoughts flooded with them, everything from their hair to their lips. He knew that they were far to amazing for anyone on this planet, including him. The thought made him feel wistful, knowing that he’d never be good enough for them. Despite telling himself that everyday it didn’t make it any easier. He wanted them, no. He needed them in more than anything, so he started to make friends. Becoming closer to them everyday.

♡ At first this was enough, being able to get close and talk to them everyday maybe even get a hug every now and then. But it wasn’t enough. It was never enough. He could still remember how it felt to hug them for even a moment. Having their arms wrapped around him and his around them. He felt warm and at ease, holding them close was everything.

♡ He found himself needing more though. Their touch now gone left a sensation of wanting more. So he started stalking them. He’d often follow them to the store maybe talk to them like it was pure coincidence. Going into their room in the cover of darkness just to caress their cheek.

♡ This would go on for weeks, Junkrat hanging out with them during the day, and watching them at night. Whenever he saw them talking to someone else he felt jealousy flare up inside him and the person would always be reported dead the next day. He knew that they were far too perfect for anyone, he knew that no one deserved to have them. So when someone tried to take them, they’d die. It’s as simple as that.

♡ The day’s turned to weeks and before he knew it a few months had passed. Everything being the same till this day. Feeling a soft tap on his solder he turned only to be greeted with the lips of now lover. He doesn’t hesitate to kiss back, taking in his s/o.

Zarya:

♡ When she first saw them she didn’t think anything special, they looked small and week as if they could be crushed like a bug. She felt the need to help them become stronger. So she volunteered to train them, helping them become stronger.

♡ As she trained them she grew to see them as much more than what she first thought. They were strong, not wanting to give up and always trying to do better. No matter how tired out they were they never gave up. She began to admire that about them.

♡ The moment she realised that she had feelings for them she felt herself melt, her mind becoming clouded with thoughts of them. When helping them work out she’d most often find herself lost in her thoughts, thinking about confessing how she feels. That is till it hits her, she goes to get a drink only to come back and see someone flirting with the one she loves. She feels angry but keeps a calm exterior acting as if nothing is bothering her.

♡ That night she kills the one who chose to flirt with her crush, she says how they deserve so much better than anyone on this planet can offer. She upset, angry with herself knowing that she’s not good enough but then thinks. If she works harder and improves herself even more than maybe she’ll be good enough.

♡ She starts training even harder knowing that one day she can be good enough for her crush. Well training one day she didn’t expect to see her crush being harassed by a man. Going over to them she’d threaten and if they chose to not listen she’d deck them before telling them to run. Once the man has fled she’d make a mental note to find them later and finish them off. She’d ask her crush if their okay, only to be greeted with a pair of lips against her own. She’d hesitated before kissing back smiling knowing that she’s the only one good enough for her s/o.

McCree:

♡ McCree has always been the type to joke around but when it came to his crush he often just because a blubbering mess. Everytime he see them is like the first as he falls in love all over again. Eyes become fixated on them taking in every little detail. How their hair shines in the light to how they subconsciously tug their shirt when nervous.

♡ He knows that he’ll never have them, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want anyone else with them. Oh no no. He doesn’t want anyone to taint what’s so perfect. Good thing he knows how to hide a corpse.

♡ He loves everything about his crush, and has come to terms of not being able to have them. Though not being able to date them doesn’t stop him from crawling into his crushes bed and holding them in his arms as he watches their sleeping face.

♡ He knows everything about them, from their middle name to the toothpaste they use He can’t help but have them on his mind 24/7 and when their in the same room talking he’s completely lost in their eyes, ignoring all the words that leave their lips. It often results in him coming back to reality embarrassed that he had zoned out and then jokes about it. Only to have himself completely fixated on their laugh. It’s like music to his ears and the oxygen he needs to breath. He needs it.

♡ In a blissful moment is when it happened. A small kiss was placed upon his lips, he felt himself freeze but as his crush pulled away he reached down to grab their face, pulling them into a desperate kiss. Something he’s dreamed about since the day he met them. He held them close as if they’d disappear from existence if he let go.

[i-amusemyself]

ALL OF CREEPY GIRL ASKS.

WHOEVER IT IS THAT SEEMS TO HAVE AN INTEREST IN ME I LOVE YOU doll: some of your favorite makeupproductsWhatever is on offer 😂 bruise: the worst wound you've ever receivedRecieved sounds like someone gave it me?! In which case I've not had anything too physically scarring. I broke my humorus once at the elbow which hurt like a bitch.taxidermy: your favorite animal(s)I adore almost every animal I could never choose!! I love capybaras and chimps and elephants and gekos and everything in between!eyeball: some of your favorite filmsDeadpool; my sisters keeper; the lovely bones; shrek (2). (That list is like a depression sandwich)syringe:someone you trust with everythingI dont seem to consciously decide who to trust, my brain just picks people who I automatically end up with verbal diahorrea with (nasty image..sorry). So like, my best friend and this other girl who I may like quite a lot tbh.porcelain: your favorite article of clothingI would say a sweater but tbh my absolute faves are my socks with a starry night onplush: your favorite childhood toyMy teddy bear that I still have right next to me when I sleep lmaoblood: some of your favorite foods Most food fucking hates me but I looove chinese food and garlic bread.pentagram: your faith or spiritualityI dont have any sort of religion and I dont really believe in a God but everything else is up for debate tbhsplatter: your favorite artists or art piecesDamn I wish I was cultured enough to answer this 😂 I did go to the van gogh museum once which was p cool but honestly idk. I just periodically see art and go "nice".teacup: some of your favorite beveragesIf I'm not drinking water I'm living off coke and hot chocolate.corpse:something you would love to do but can'tI always wanted to be a stunt guy but my joints protest when I walk up the stairs sooknife something you're good at cooking or bakingI dont make anything 😭 I used to make a mean lasagne and a hella good cheese cake but I cant eat 'em now lollipop: some of your favorite candyChocolate.monster: your worst habits How long a list do you want? Lets see; jumping to conclusions, getting jealous too easily; overthinking; forgetting things; squeezing the toothpaste tube in the middle; leaving piles of trash everywhere...pills: something you'd change about yourself I mean I kinda hate who I am as a person but if I changed it I could be even worse? Sooo idk, either my looks or my mental health.potion: something you'd change about humanity Tbf at this point I just wanna find humanity's reset button and shut this current fuckup down.asylum: your favorite place in the worldI'm sure I'll find better but as it stands at the top of a hill in the middle of nowhere.mantis: your sexual orientation Who knows 😂 I like girls. I like guys that way occasionally. Think I could only date girls though. No idea what labels I could stick on that.stitches: some of your self-care habitsHot chocolate; watching my favourite shows; listening to a playlist of my favourite songs; ranting on my other blog and going to bed.velvet:your favorite era for fashion and aesthetics I really love all the sort of 1950's vintage dresses (though I'd never wear one) and also I kinda love steampunk stuff, though its not technically an era.teeth: something that makes you laughMemes.piano: something that makes you cryMy life 😂😂😂 Nah erm, literally anything sad or happy ever happening in any TV show basically.witch: a power you wish you hadI wish I had the power to make people feel more at ease. Not necesarily control their emotions but just help em out. Also mindreading.chainsaw: your favorite soundThe letterbox when the post arrives.ribbon:your favorite color combinationsNot to be edgy but I love black with just about everything.pigtails:how affectionate you areI'm ridiculously affectionate but I'd never initiate anything bc I'm so scared of annoying or bothering people. But honestly if I could spend all day hugging my friends I would.succubus: your weirdest kinks😏🤐 lets just say I'm not as vanilla as I thought. ghost:a historical figure you're drawn to......no one? I mean I guess Jack the Ripper bc he's interesting af but I wouldnt say "drawn to" is the right phrase 😂lullaby: songs you love to singAnything I'm terrible at apparently 😂 Nah I love singing anything Amber Run or Hozier or Daughter related.