#i dont have super much to add to this ask
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wlw-cryptid · 10 months ago
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Opinion on chubby butches/butches with stretch marks?
sweetheart. if my header werent what it is, it'd be "dad bod butches please call me"
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inferno-silentdragon · 2 years ago
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Castlepoint Anime con 2023 had a lot of OMORI cosplayers and man was it a blast to play songs for them on the keytar!
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angeloftrumpets · 1 year ago
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Hiii ^_^/ I was wondering if you had a back/story for your S/I(s) with any of your F/O(s)? I'm mostly curious, and only if you'd like to share :3c
HIIIIIIII okie this is going to probab;y be a very jumbled adnd maybe confusing and long post bc AA but i will try to make it understandable and write it before my ride gets here and picks me UP OKIE (edit i have been adding onto this post on my shift since like 1 am my time so i apologize if its confusing my work laptop is weird ANYWAYS)
I only have one s/i aside from just straight?? up me?? (or a backstory if that makes sense) and thats neph or, the cat/shark guy (Funfact!!! neph came from a convo with toonie, ill explain a bit below but he is cursed to not have a name and since hes a Nephilim toonie decided to start calling him neph, as like a shorter version of it! (thanks toon ! :3 💛)
to begin obviously he is a Nephilim, i hc six also is one since i remembered my mom telling me something about the Nephilim teaching humanity about technology i dont know where it is said about that but thats where that hc comes from!! they are both (neph and six) are kind of a 'different' kind of Nephilim as in they are only related with technology and were apart of the ones that showed humanity technology, so example both him and six both have the ability to go through the television and when it is invented computers/phones etc, that just kinda explains the general basis of how he works the cat tail/shark stuff is cause im cringe and think that combo looks cool and that he can shapeshift (As i imagine most nephilims can?) and since he mostly exist on a digital plane no one is going to question if they see some weird combination of animal on some animated program if he were to appear in it even though he looks like that physically also. due to the fact that he is a Nephilim, he obviously isnt liked by most beings from the heavens since he is a product of a human and a fallen angel and was cursed by the big g himself to not have a name nor be seen physically by humanity, which can get pretty lonely and make someone weird, he has a long history of being chased out by various angels that catch him lurking by (he likes to hang out around the garden of eden, thats where him and toonie met) ALSO if we are gonna get specific michael DOESNT like him and has definitely nearly killed him like twice. hes welcome in hell tho :))) neph doesnt hold any hard feelings twards angels for not being fond of him considering what he is, but not all of them are like that. obviously, toon being one of them (or i guess archangel gabriel if we are being literal but i dont want to confuse alt g and him so i will say toon)
when they both first met toon was definitely a little anxious at first considering hes heard of Nephilims/his peers going after them/ and the flood in general (by the way, i dont remember what ep it is but i hc when alt g tells noah something will be joining him on the boat it neph was apart of that (specifically six and neph, and some type of alternate, since the flood also wiped out Nephilims he had to keep some alive to help him) anyways back to what i was saying sjhfdfh they ended up becoming close and when toon isnt off doing angel or messenger duties hes usually with neph in the garden of eden (same goes with if neph isnt doing something for alt g or something along those lines) after the events of overthrone (if we go by the toonb/riel sand tomb theory i know some people think that was jesus or atleast my roomate hcs this so ) neph wasnt told about what had happened to him and was confused why he was no longer able to find him, noticing that there was definitely something very wrong with the heavens (due to alt gs actions yk) he ends up eventually figuring out what had happened and in a weird time/universe fucky way is able to get toonb/riel out, since its no longer safe at all for toon to exist (and also alt gab doesnt know that he has escaped) he basically is forced to exist within the realm of media in a strange way (BEGINNER BIBLEEEE HEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEEHEHE) though this isnt 100% set in stone and it changes but i like to think it would be cool if he is able to exist within the realms of technology as some digital angel OKIE i am SO SO SO SORRY FOR SUCH A LONG POST i got so giddy and excited at seeing this ask and have been trying my best to figure out how to answere it THANK YOU SO MUCHF OR ASKING ME!!!!!!
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talkorsomething · 5 months ago
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They literally just had a conversation about ice cube trays and whether or not they were clean (they decided they were not i think?) and did NOT ask me anything. Do i not exist to you people
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arolesbianism · 7 months ago
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Thinking abt the random card au again. Why must it go so crazy hard I miss it sm
#rat rambles#random card au#no matter how far I drift from my bndori and sekai peak days the random card au keeps hitting me like a truck every now and then#it just scratches an itch that I havent been able to satisfy since my cr days years and years ago#I wouldnt say the random card au has super similar worldbuilding to my old cr stuff as that was much more large scale#but it still has a similar appeal to me I think#I think its the building entirely new worldbuilding based off of designs and general vague starting concepts and bringing them all together#that gets me invested as it feels so satisfying slotting it all together and then actually getting to play out the story in this new web#I loveeeee jumbled webs of worldbuilding and characters that all tie together in a way that makes it almost impossible to completely#seperate one cast of characters from another#I love the feeling of a world with a bunch of intertwining plots like that even if it makes it near impossible to format a normal story#like my cr stuff was just so much man I still miss it sometimes even if I hate cr itself#Ive become a much better story creator too now so I know I could make what I had so much better nowadays and I already like my old stuff#it just makes me all the more sad that I went so crazy hard on worldbuilding for a franchise that sucks ass </3#it may have been two of the worst years of my life but Ill also never reach that worldbuilding high again I think#oh also it made me actually start the slow slow process of getting more ambitious with my art and doing more digital stuff#rly thats the biggest reason the random card au pains me so since I wanna post stuff for it but man do I not wanna draw anyone from it#first of all human characters so already eh but also Id have to adapt the cards theyre based on into a design I can actually draw#so as much as I wanna make a billion random card au animatics I cant even bring myself to draw them normally#you see olivia and jackie are easier to draw because I just made shit up for their designs and as such made their designs very simple#but I cant just make shit up for bndori and sekai characters they actually have designs and hair that Id have to adapt to my style it sucks#I just wanna draw doggy arisa is that so much to ask for (yes yes it is I dont wanna figure out her hood)#also rip mygo yall will probably never get in but who knows maybe one day Ill have my second bndori era and then y'all will get in#its rly just the fact that they likely wont have enough cards to properly add them for another few years#especially if that other band also gets in if that happens neither are getting enough cards until the servers shut down lol#like I Could just pick and choose but thats boring#kinda ruins the point of the au y'know?#like tbf Ive cheated in the past by reroling two and limiting my options with several sekai characters#but thats just because at the time most sekai characters had almost no usable cards for this au and the two I rerolled were also unusable#like Im sorry but I couldnt just add normal ass hagumi and masking it wasn't happening
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lotussokka · 9 months ago
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hey idk if any of you are pastors but you should not do a sermon about how humans are inherently undeserving of love and how adopted children are undeserving of adoption and dont ask to be adopted (???) during a funeral, especially during the funeral of a woman with an adopted grandchild
#the whole thing was bullshit from start to finish and its so clear he had never met my nana#which is fucked up bc he wasnt a pastor contracted through a funeral home he was her pastor#like yeah hes an interim pastor but was he only there for 2 weeks ???#as it went on i progressed from trying to be subtle about rolling my eyes to open disgust bc it was so fucked up i wanted him to know#the entire story about adopted children was so distasteful that my nana wouldve gave him a piece of her mind if it had been my papa who died#he talked birth mothers stopping adoptions as them being selfish for keeping their child from Good People#which is horrendously offensive in general but also bc my aunt and uncle had birth mothers change their mind multiple times#and it was super sad every time it happened bc they were so excited to be getting a baby but they always had sympathy for the mother#the last time a mother changed her mind they were so devastated they almost asked to be removed from the list#but then they got a sudden call about robbie bc his mother hadn’t been Formally Planning to give him up while she was pregnant#he talked about adopted children like burdens that Good People™ take on infuriates me to no end#at least he didnt also do a call to salvation during the funeral like a pastor did at one my mom went to a few years ago#you dont care#on a different topic#my greatuncle was surprisingly disapproving of my current life situation which hurts bc he was on such a pedestal in my mind#also his wife is so empathetic about it that she brought it up to me#she has started to have sleep issues and she wanted to tell me that she now understands just how much that inhibits your life#it was genuine (and conversationally appropriate) she didnt just walk up to me and loudly tell me She Understands Now™#you can reblog i guess ?? but please dont add my tags especially not the ones after ‘you dont care’
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strawberrynull · 6 months ago
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please can you write niki with a noona gf !! and he tries his hardest to impress her and let her see him as a big boy now ^.^
fluff or suggestive, i dont mind ❤️❤️ thankss
──⯎ ˙ 💋 ̟ noona!
엔하이픈 | Enhypen | Nishimura Riki
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──Pairing: bf!niki x afab!reader
──Genre: fluff, angst
──Synopsis: Poor Niki despises being treated like a baby by his girlfriend who is only slightly older than him. He decides to try to prove to her that hes not a baby
──Warnings: cursing, established relationship, kissing, making out, skinship, hickeys
──A/N: guys im working on making a taglist so if u wanna be added pls message me or comment or sum so ik to add you
masterlist
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"Hi baby. How was your day?" you ask your boyfriend, reaching up to cup his cheeks as you kiss his forehead. Niki's smile faded slightly upon hearing your name for him. Truthfully, calling him baby made him feel like a baby. Babe was fine but calling him baby just seemed to upset him. Sometimes you would take it a step further just to make him more upset by calling him 'baby boy' which was so much worse.
"It was uh... fine I guess." He shrugged, clenching his teeth slightly when you ran your fingers through his dark hair. You were already treating him like a fragile being as soon as he had gotten home. This severely pissed him off. Not to the extent that he would get mad at you though. He had never yelled at you or anything like that. Usually when he was mad he would just walk away and sulk.
"You seem a little out of it. Did something happen?" you asked genuinely, sticking your bottom lip out to form a small pout.
"Just tired." Niki mummbled briefly, not stopping to look at you. He slipped out of your embrace and made his way to sit on the couch. You followed him to the living room of your shared apartment. His expression and demeanor told you to fuck off but sometimes you didn't know when to stop. You took a seat next to him so you could continue to run your fingers through his dark locks. He groaned in annoyance, jerking his head away from you.
"Yah, why are you so cranky? Got a stick up your ass or sum'?" You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest with a scowl.
Niki really did like when you played with his hair. Though, right now he had to resist it. He had to get you to realize he didn't want to be treated like a little baby. He wanted to be treated like an adult. He wanted you to think of him as your super hot boyfriend instead of your baby boy. It was no easy task trying to look all tough in front of you when you were so sweet to Niki.
In a sudden swift move, Niki stood from the couch and turned to go to his room. You reached a hand out to attempt to stop him but it was pointless. He had already made up his mind to leave. There was no stopping him once his mind was made.
"Yah! Where do you think you're going?" you yelled to him, hoping he would stop and come back. Though you knew he wouldn't.
Your boyfriend stopped with a heavy sigh. He turned around to face you. "I don't want to be treated like a baby by you."
"But Ki, you're myyyyyy baby~" you coo, clearly not making the situation any better as Niki shuts the door to his bedroom. You hear a small click and you know he's locked the door too. You throw your head back in frustration eliciting a long sigh.
After a while you start to worry that your boyfriend is genuinely mad. 20 had passed by and he has yet to leave his room. Neither have you heard any noise from his room. You grumble as you push yourself off the couch and trudge over to his bedroom door. Knocking softly, you press an ear to the door. When you hear nothing on the other side, you decide to knock again. This time you hear shuffling which you assume is Niki getting up from his bed. But instead of him opening the door, you hear his gaming chair squeak.
"Come on. You know I don't actually think you're a baby, Riki." You groan, sitting down against his door. You cross your arms over your chest. "Please come back out."
Nothing but silence is heard from his room. You know damn well that he's not actually playing games and ignoring you. When he's mad, he'll pretend to be busy but he'll really just sit there trying to resist coming out of his room to kiss you.
"Say that you won't treat me like a baby anymore." you can tell by the sound of his voice that he's pouting. It makes you giggle.
"Is that all its going to take to get you to come out of your room?"
"You have to promise!" He yells back. You begin to feel bad. You can tell that he's serious that he doesn't want to be treated like a baby. He's so cute and pretty though that sometimes you can't help it. Sometimes you have to give things up for the greater good. And in this case, your boyfriend wasn't coming back out unless you gave up the baby-talk and pampering.
"Alright, Niki, I promise. I'll stop treating you like a baby." Upon hearing your promise, the door opens slightly. You look up to see your pretty boyfriend. He looks down at your sitting figure with a slight pout. Still so cute.
"Hi pretty boy." You stand from your spot on the floor. Niki opens the door wider and stands to the side, signaling for you to come in. You do just that. You step into his room which was dark from the lights being off and the windows being covered by the curtains.
Once you're fully inside the room, the door shuts behind you. Niki's hands find their way to your hips and he pushes you until your back hits the door. Heat rises to your cheeks when you realize why he's acting this way. He really does want to be treated like an adult.
He brought a hand up to cup your cheek before crashing his lips onto yours. You give a muffled gasp at his sudden action. Your hands quickly found the back of his neck, pulling him impossibly closer. Your lips seemed to mold together perfectly as if the two of you were made for each other. It may seem like he's being unnecessarily rough in him movements but his kisses are gentle as his thumb rubs circles on your cheek. Your heart flutters at the softness of his touch. You know that he could never bring himself to be rough with you.
Though, he still didn't seem satisfied. The hand that was once on your waist had snaked to the small of your back. He pulled you toward him until your bodies were flush against each other. His lips moved down to kiss your neck, setting warmth to every part of your skin he touches. Your fingers played with his hair while he bit the soft skin of your neck then soothed the mark with his tongue. Unbeknownst to you, he was melting under your touch even more than you, feeling you play with his hair. Of course he was whipped for you. He continued to leave marks on your neck and shoulders until he was satisfied with his work. He pulled away to look at you like you were like his own personal canvas.
"Ki, I-"
"I told you not to treat me like a baby." He deadpanned with a cold harsh glare as his fingers held your chin. His face moved close to yours, his lips hovering next to your ear. His voice caused a chill to run down your spine. "I'm not going to let that happen again, yeah?"
His fingers slid down to wrap around your throat, squeezing gently. You gasped slightly at his change in attitude. He had never once acted this way. Every new action was a surprise to you. His lips found themselves back on yours like a magnet. The pressure on your throat made your head spin. Niki could tell he was getting the reaction he wanted. It made his mind fuzzy seeing you like this.
Niki removed his lips from yours which were now swollen and red. He released his grip on your throat and brought a finger up to swipe your bottom lip. He chucked watching you gasp for air.
"Am I still a baby to you?" he asked, causing you to shake your head frantically. As cute as he was, you had to admit, he was so ungodly hot too. And, god, was that hot. "Good." Niki turned and walked away from you, leaving you confused.
"Niki, what was that-"
"Go away, I'm embarrassed." he whined, plopping onto the bed and throwing a blanket over himself and hiding his face. You burst out in a fit of laughter. He really was too adorable. "Shut up!" He sat up wielding a pillow which he threw full force at you, sending you landing on your ass. You sat on the floor laughing at how cute your boyfriend was.
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© strawberrynull, 2024. Do not copy my work. Please DM for permission before translating or reuploading. Thank You
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jaysng · 7 months ago
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🫐 - jake! maybe about reader having some hardships during her pregnancy but baby daddy jake would be ready to do anything for her comfort !!
rejecting his kisses | sjy
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pairing: husband!jake x wife!reader
genre: fluff bro what else i write 😭😭
synopsis: reader is growing sensitive day by day to touches and snaps at jake, jake being a mature husband handles the situation well.
everything felt so much more overwhelming, jake kept a family dinner and everyone was over, his members and his family. 
“how are my babies doing?” jake said as he nuzzled his nose in your neck as you moved back in annoyance. 
oh he noticed it but shrugged it off, maybe it was just a silly reaction right?
the sound of everyone talking at the same time in their own conversation rings around in your ears making it hard for you to keep up with everything jake had his hands on you the whole day, hugging you from behind, talking to his friends and family with a hand on your bump, rubbing your nose agaisnt his, kissing your cheeks, lips and forehead. yeah sounds cute but not when you’re feeling everything a little too much. 
what is going on. 
it was so bad that you had to shut your room door so loud and settle on the bed, 
there you were, pregnant and finally on your thrid trimester with your annoying husband being extra touchy anywhere he could find you at.
rubbing your temples you sat on the bed, grabbed the water from the beside table and starting chugging it down. 
meanwhile, jake who already spotted your absensce in the living room came in “bub?” you heard his voice and your brain gave a reaction not again. 
he walks in as you don’t even dare to look at him in the eye, your eyes closed as you take deep breath. 
“did i do something” he leans over to your face while staring deep “no..” u say as he hums in question he sits beside you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder “are you oka-“ you cut him off,
“no- just no- please okay? please just get your hands off of me please jake. stay away from me i am not feeling all your touches just leave me the fuck alone.” you say raising your voice. 
the next thing you see is tears in jake’s eyes as he looks away from you trying to hold them in. 
“i am sorry.” 
a moment of complete silence goes by as you rest your head on the headboard.
you notice him avoiding your looks and turning to the other side, hesitant to ask you if you need anything again.
“did i do something wrong?” he asks out of curiosity “i won’t touch you if—“
“no i dont know.. i am sorry i dont feel like getting touched i dont know.. i don’t know why i am being like this i don’t know” as you’re saying he turns around and comes closer to you.
attentively listening as he brings a hand to tug your hair strand back.
“hey no no it’s fine, its completely fine yeah, this is super normal for pregnant women to feel..” he says as tears start spilling from your eyes because of how understanding he is. 
jake has always put your perspective before his, always understanding everything you did, always finding a reason for your actions and letting you express yourself, god you think what did you do to deserve him. 
“b-but jake” you say as he holds your face in his hands and squishes your cheeks trying to calm you down.
“at this stage you’ve grown more sensitive. to touches to words to noises to everything” he says bringing his hands back to himself, “isn’t it?” 
you nod in agreement as he adds “so don’t ever blame yourself about all this okay? i love you just how it is. nothing will ever change that” 
you look at him and take his hand and place it on your belly, he makes sure to keep it exactly where you kept and not rub it because of muscle memory 
he pauses and lets out a little laugh as he feels the baby kicking where his arm is placed “just try not to be as aggressive as you were okay?” you nod once again as he kisses your cheeks wiping your tears off his lips. 
“baby doesn’t like hearing mum and dad argue does it?” he says as he feels another kick to his palm as you both laugh out of surprise. 
it makes you giggle, mood swings are crazy.
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martinsorbit · 1 year ago
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Oh hey, it's that sun guy.
After two arduous weeks (Aug 1st - Aug 15th) the Sun cold porcelain figure is COMPLETE! DONE! FINISHED! HE IS HERE IN ALL HIS GLORY
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Its been a long (and at times painful) process considering the time it took for all the stuff to dry and for me to have free time to finish this project, but now the silly little jester is in my hands and he looks SO CUTE AND COOL!! HE EVEN HAS A HOOK
Thanks everyone for hyping me up and keeping me motivated during this <3 It literally meant a ton and helped me keep working on this bonkus shit
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under the read more, there will be some more details about the figure itself and some more pictures ( Like materials, how much time it took, the process stuff etc)
feel free to ask me questions! thanks everyone!
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QUESTIONS ABOUT THE PROCESS!
Q: What materials did you use for this?
A: White Cold Porcelain, Hot Glue, super glue, pencils, pliers, paper clips, scissors, paint, all purpose varnish, paintbrushes, metalic pens
Q: How long did it take to make him?
A: Roughly two weeks
Q: Are you going to make moon too?
A: yes but it will take a while
Q: [X element of suns character design] is missing.
A: trust me, I know. Ive been staring at his model for roughly a whole week and mentally rotating him in my brain , so if something is missing its cuz i was either having a hard time making it or cuz I took creative liberties lmao
Q: How long did it take for the stuff to dry?
A: The cold porcelain abt 3 ish days; Paint took 1 day and the varnish also a day (as it states in the bottle)
FINAL NOTES:
Yes, you can use colored cold porcelain instead of painting it! It's just easier for me to paint it over
- For the love of god, be careful when applying the varnish, that shit is bad for your health! read the instructions, do it in a ventilated area, and NEVER put it too close to your face, or u might get some not so good side effects ( like yer eyes burning)
No, i dont intend on selling him anytime soon sorry ( this was asked before regarding some other cold porcelain thing I did, so I just thought i would add it here)
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- If u dont wanna spend too much money on the colors u can just buy some Yellow, Cyan, Magenta, Black and White (CMYK) along with some skin tones; u can basically make any color from those
- I used two of Sun's main poses in the game as inspo for making this
- His faceplate is supposed to spin but since it keeps falling off I decided to glue it
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vyzz-undercover · 2 months ago
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im insane have a few kilos of:
[cato/f!ambassador]
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5)
(6,600ish words) (please fucking sedate me)
{i dont usually write in whatever perspective having a 'you' in this sort of context is, so forgive any oopsies besties!!!}
CONTENT WARNINGS:
•slight dubcon
•hints of size kink
•intercourse [M/F]
•degrading language
•mild possessive behaviour
•pisspoor cliche of 'oh no you're freezing haha body warmth eh?' trope
•mr. sicarius' insufferable ego
•tumblr's dogshit formatting from phone notes to the app
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super special thanks to all the writers im too much of a spineless coward to actually @ because i only ever lurked on anon asks on old main for, like: moodymisty, mothiir, lemon-russ, the-raven-lady, scriberye and many others. you're all the unknowing reasons why i made an alt to post this, cheers for your amazing works and ideas!!! :3
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It was doomed from the start, honestly.
Not to say he had any hope that an assignment would ever actually go easily for once.
It's supposed to be an apparently simple diplomatic procedure. Namely, you get to stand around, run your ambassadorial trap and bat your lashes and trollop about in front of pompous baseline fools. While he, Cato Sicarius, stands at attention in pissy formal wear; pretending like he's not a hair-breadth from an aneurysm watching it all take place.
Oh, and not to forget the brother who's a head taller than him, in full plate, and isn't being held to a standard of mock-humility.
He realises belatedly he's forgotten the Primaris' name. That shouldn't happen. He never used to forget things. Eidetic memory shouldn't let him. He shouldn't be able to—or, well—maybe his subconscious deigned it unimportant and emptied it out the proverbial airlock of his mind. It was admittedly largely inconsequential. He'd been told, surely. He remembers he was a Sergeant of some sort from his markings. He also remembers being gawked at by the Primaris, borderline felated by eyes alone. He's Cato Sicarius, afterall. Grand Duke of Talassar and High Suzerain of Ultramar—of course he'd been inspiring awe. But for some warp-damned reason, alongside all those great titles, his Father'd decided to add Master Babysitter of His Ambassador to the list. But Cato does doesn't let it bother him. He's always got better things to occupy his time. Like furiously glaring at you across the thunder-hawk, even if you'd been dead-set on counting the rivets in the floor plating.
You'd looked absolutely idiotic in an Astartes troop seat. Like a toddler in an adult-sized wheelchair, draped in furs that seemed a size too big; hiding a dress that looked a size too small.
Simply put, the entire assignment was to be an event in circle-jerking—until shit hit the fan with all the painful similarity of a Nurgling thrown headlong into a thruster engine.
To begin with, it was a trap—a trap where he's separated from brother-Sergeant 'whatever-the-fuck-riel' in the commotion and responding bolter fire. That'd left Cato pointedly responsible for evacuating you, the useless little chatterbox, by the scruff of your fuzzy coat through side halls.
On another note, of all the accursed biomes, he hates tundras the most.
Pointedly, it's exactly what seventy percent of this backwater, shit-hole planet is this time of year; whereas the other thirty percent is glacial mush.
He discovers firsthand just how much sloshy ice-water there is to be found as he kicks in a shutter door and gets doused for the first time of many to follow; only to vault from the eastern rampart. Sliding down a long, raised and sleet covered run-off canal that passed over the keep's lesser residential rooftops with you in his grasp.
Melt water soaks you both as he scrambles fights to a halt on the steep decline before the drop off. Wobbling balancing on the edge for a second before he manages to scud back up and down a side chute, worming through the raucous hellscape of filthy baselines and too-tight alleys into the scrappy frozen wilds.
There was little time to hesitate when he decides breaking into a dead-sprint with a soggy ambassador thrown over his shoulder's the modus operandi of the situation.
He didn't stop until he was at least fifteen clicks away, or rather—he only stops when he's able to recognise a spot to hide and await for emergency evacuation.
A half-standing shack. Probably some peasant's hunting hovel. Clearly in poor condition, and honestly, a cave would've been preferable—but he isn't about to pass up the opportunity.
The door doesn't even swing open when he nudges it with his elbow. No, it falls inward, because of course it does, and he grumbles belatedly when it thuds.
The inside of the structure is a damnable mess, but, at the very least, it's dry.
He moves to tug you off his shoulder and toss you onto a pile of rags in the far corner, but he hesitates periodically. Even through his own wet outer attire, he can tell very little body heat is coming off you. His hearing catches on the way your breathing labours below the incessant chatter of your teeth.
Some wretched part of him implores he let you down carefully next to the nested mess of dirty cloth; and for once, he acquiesces to granting mercy.
You curl up into a ball on the floorboards almost immediately.
In his eyes, you're the pict of some drowned rat. The fur coat you'd been wearing over your dress is just as soaked through as everything else. Your hair is full of small, frozen rivulets at the ends, mixed in with powder snow and ice; and all the while, you're whining softly and trying to coil tighter into a fetal position.
He's trying very hard not to just stand there and dumbly listen to your little noises of weakness like a salivating dog.
Instead, Cato turns and lifts the door back into place against the frame; then he activates the honing beacon on his belt.
No latency pings, no close contact.
He grumbles again, eyeing your shivering form over his shoulder begrudgingly.
He hates you.
He hates that he's the one who's responsible for you.
The fact he is also currently out of his power-armour because of this charade only makes him even more irate, impossibly.
Sure, he has his combat bodyglove on under the tacky regalia, but it's no real consolation. He'd feel a lot better if there was a couple extra hundred kilos of plasteel and ceramite on him.
He could've had his armour on, had someone else been the one to babysit you.
He would have preferred anything but sole custody of your wretched, annoying existence falling on him. But because he's the only competent Astartes around ninety percent of the time, and you're the root of all problems—it means he's the only one who's capable of handling your stupidity. He can't even imagine letting anyone else do it. You'd probably deafen Trajan with your yapping if he was in his stead. Or Prabian. And if Titus had watch of you, you two'd probably be—ugh, he won't even dignify the thought. He can't believe the man'd been Captain of Second Company before him, or how or why Agemman gave the captaincy to him. He understands why Titus'd been struck from most records aside from high clearance. To say nothing of the fact that one would think being a Blackshield for a century would humble someone. But no, it seems crossing the Rubicon Primaris gave him his balls back.
Cato had almost flown into a blind rage when he'd heard him jokingly warning about rough weather to you on the embarkation deck the last time you'd been in each others general vicinity—because oh, of course Lieutenant Titus is suddenly a subsector-renowned fucking comedian as soon as you're there. Cato ought to subpoena the dribbling Inquisition like that little snake Leandros did. See how Titus'd like a real stage to perform on again. Maybe they'll have a new rendition of the cunted Rubicon Primaris to piece his sorry fat-arse back together once more by then. But he won't. He won't because Marneus would sulk, and Cato would feel bad. Plus, Cato's infinitely more likely to kill an Inquisitor than help one. But you—you little skank—you find Titus so funny. Hiding a giggle behind your hand, pretending to look demure and professional despite your wretched nature.
Why don't you smile at him like that?
You would be the death of him.
It was always all because of you. Every single time. Because you're so useless in any situation that can't be rambled out of. Which is all of them when you're involved, in Cato's opinion. His Father should leave the talking to professionals who wouldn't break a hip from a smack on the rear.
But now you are going to die of hypothermia, like a typical, pathetic little baseline—well, unless you start following his orders.
Cato tries not to think of how you were acting when rounds started going off earlier. Of course, like a spooked animal, you'd been all ears to his commands then. Hiding against him with your hands pawing at the side of his dress uniform as bullets careened across the dining hall, looking up at him with those big, terrified, caught-in-the-crosshair eyes—and, Throne, it had been so easy to pick you up. You were so soft flimsy, he could fling you around like a rag-doll if he really wanted. Manhandling you would be a singlehanded venture. He's liable to just hoist you up whenever you think yourself bold enough to bother him next. Grab you by your uniform's scruff and just pin you against a bulkhead, you'd be bent at the perfect height to—no—no, no.
Abruptly trying to distract himself, Cato draws his blade from it's ceremonial sheath and activates the disruption core, trying to stoke some sort of heated spark as he drove it into the fireplace.
He brutishly nudges it amidst the old wood and long dim coals. It isn't his finest moment of critical thinking, but it seems to be working; seeing as a few weak embers sputter to life.
Gratingly, he's aware that even a servitor would've known starting a fire in hostile territory was a fool's surest way at getting caught—but he has no other choice. Either he acts the moron and plays his poor hand, or you die from the shock of your chill; and if that happens, he'll have to face his Father's wrath.
And Guilliman would have his left testicle as a paperweight if you died under his watch.
In conclusion, if Cato is to choose between stupidity and complete failure, he's opting for stupidity. Which aggravatingly felt like an ongoing occurrence, ever since you started existing anywhere near him.
He reaches for your soggy swaddled form, and tugs.
Even practically hypothermic, you've still got enough of a two-faced-bitch's spirit hidden away in you to hiss and swat at him blindly. So much for his Father's claims you were of 'sweet, kind temperament.'
For a moment, he genuinely wants to throttle you for the outburst; but he swallows down the urge.
"You need to get out of those," he snaps, glowering down at you. "Or you are going to die."
Your response is a poignant little groan as you glance dizzily around the room.
Cato huffs, "There are blankets beside you, fool."
He holds up a dingy plaid throw, half fraying and stinking of stale mould. It was an assault on his vomeronasal organ, but he wasn't about to let you act the typical spoiled cunt routine of an Imperial ambassador. He would have you wrapped in it sooner rather than later, wether you liked it or not. You dying reflects poorly on him, afterall.
"T-T-Turn, p-p-please—" you say, but your stammering mangles the words into a juddering mess.
He growls, almost tempted to snarl something about 'the fucking audacity in thinking you can tell him what to do—' but acquiesces out of sheer force of will and pivots on his heel, settling into a martial line stance.
Cato can hear you struggling to wriggle free of your clothes. The whines of effort and heavy breathing, to say nothing of the almost comedic slop sound one miscellaneous article makes as it hits the rotted wooden floorboards.
Even if he's taking it to his grave, he's admittedly itching to look over his shoulder.
It's a completely degenerate urge.
But he's—he's wanted this. He's wanted this exact opportunity.
He's got it, now.
You're alone with him.
Nothing and nobody to distract or detract from your attention finally being all on him.
You make a fey little groan, and he takes that as a signal you're finished.
He rounds about-face, and, for lack of a better word, ogles the shape of your covered form.
You've dragged that pile of rags closer to the meagre fireplace, lying on it with the plaid blanket strewn over the top of you.
Even completely hidden beneath, he can see you are still shaking under the ratty thing. Even moreso than before, in all actuality. He supposes that's a good sign. It proves your feeble body is still well and keen on living.
But the suffocating concept you're bare weak, soft useless and needing pathetic underneath that scrap of fabric worms its way into his brain like a cancer.
He grits his teeth so hard his jaw aches.
Tearing his gaze away, he finds the embers his blade coaxed are a small flame eating away at the old timber now.
Looking back, your shivering's subsiding, but your rapid breathing is increasing; which is surely not good.
He has an idea, which definitely isn't influenced by depravity at all—shut up.
Cato tries for a moment to actually unbutton his attire. His fingers are too large, unsurprisingly. And with the body-suit, he's got no leverage of a nail or two to do away with the dainty fasteners. So, ultimately, he tears the regalia down the front, sending buttons flying—and continues to pry and rend the sopping garments off his arms and legs until they're a pile at his feet.
Then he sets about a more strenuous matter. He releases the locking mechanism at his clavicle, and promptly undoes the thick claps over his pectorals so he can pop free the catches beneath, peeling the layered material back and shucking his arms and hands loose of their constraints.
The top of his bodyglove hangs around his hips now, and he sighs. The chill is of no real annoyance to him. He's built to endure most conditions. Sure, it's cold—but Astartes run hot. And right now, he's boiling for so very many accursed reasons.
He settles on his side next to you and scuds himself to bracket the pile of fabric.
"Move closer," he bites out.
He tries not to groan when you actually do, and surprises himself when he manages to stifle the sound. Even through the blanket, he imagines his warmth is a welcome change to freezing.
"T-Thank you," you say softly, soaking in his body heat like a banal reptile under a sun's rays.
He likes hearing timidity on your lips.
He supposes it stems from his habit of humbling you. The opportunities are unsurprisingly plentiful. He often finds enjoyment hearing you back-pedal when he would cut you down for so much as genially inquiring on Astartesian discussions. Putting himself in the middle and shutting you out, even if you were welcomed in them prior to his arrival.
If you want to ask something of his Brothers, it'll be his answers.
All it ever took was a growl and a curt reminder to know your place. Then you'd fumble and take two steps back. Snipped down to size as you ought to be. Forced to suffer an ounce of the shame he feels. Oh, and then your big doe-eyes'd cast down at Cato's ceramite boots, fussing; trying to apologise to him.
In truth, it's adorable pathetic to watch.
You look so hurt.
It's an act, he's sure of it.
You play at being difficult to anger, and that makes you just that bit more grating. You've unknowingly caught him with an unfair advantage. One that his prowess as a statesman and a warrior cannot seem to scratch. He's always left feeling robbed in your presence. In a way that furiously giving in to the alien urge of palming himself afterwards doesn't ever fix. He's toey and irked to be excluded when you talk to other Astartes, but simultaneously darkly glad that you shy from such antics with him.
It's paradoxical, yes. But no, he's not a hypocrite. Though some part of him is scolding him for being one. No, he's aching to sink his proverbial claws into you—though he won't ever say it to a soul. He won't because he knows he's not supposed to have tastes such as this. A pit in his gut taunts that the stint he'd suffered in the Warp is to blame. But he's the commander of Roboute Guilliman's Victrix Guard. He is not aberrant. The sidelong, fraction-of-a-second glances Cato receives from his Primarch when you enter his office to give briefings surely mean nothing.
It's clear why you have his Father's favour, but he'll never admit that either. Aside from Guilliman's desperation to find baseline company for some strange reason. You're surely just a pet to him. Like a small rodent he pries off a little wheel and sets out in a clear sphere to roll about on the bridge, or something.
To say nothing of his brothers' behaviours.
They won't show it in a group, but he knows the Astartes beneath him preen at your every query.
It's complete lunacy.
It's heresy.
You must have somehow beguiled them all, just like you've done him.
But you're still right there—right where he wants you.
And damn it all, does he want you.
He wants—he wants you on your front, squirming underneath him. No, wait, he wants to see you—but then you'd need to be on top. He can watch, like that. Then afterwards he'll have you on your back, perhaps. Why not sideways? You're already like that, now. Or—or... who's he kidding, he'd take anything, and everything.
Throne, he's so hard he swears he is going to have a brain haemorrhage. He feels like he's already had one, honestly, for all his thoughts are hazing. It's a million leagues worse than the time you'd accidentally called him 'Lord Sicarius' by accident instead of your usual choice of 'Commander' and Throne, he'd rubbed himself raw after that.
Maybe if you weren't such a whorish little wretch, his fantasies wouldn't be running so rabid right now.
You wriggle and your half-covered back slides up against his front.
Cato's never held himself stiller in his life.
Your skin feels like fine silk to his spiralling mind; and even worse, your damnable wriggling doesn't stop. You start making little movements with your feet to try to get circulation back in them—and again, there's a fey similarity to your behaviours and some soaked rodent he recognises.
Decidedly, you've realised it's not enough and promptly jut your feet backwards between his quads. Still continuing the motions, but more furiously.
The touch is dangerously close to the cradle of his inner thighs.
He swears he actually feels the blood drain from his face in mortification. The touch is meagre, but it's real. It's more warming than any he's ever known. And of course, to add insult to injury, that blood drains straight to were he's already painfully hard—which is currently pushed against his navel, halfway jutting out of his bodyglove's zipper.
Thankfully, you withdraw yourself from between his legs and sigh again, snug.
Then, you shuffle closer.
Your rear scuds right up to the swell of his confined cock.
Cato's immediately beside himself in an instant, flying into a rainbow of emotion. First, he's disgusted. Then he's seething at the audacity—which makes him furious—and finally, he's... he's ecstatic.
He groans, raring like some rutting animal; but the sound ultimately leaves him as an angry, subvocal snarl of transhuman harmonics.
You flinch, and wriggle away sharply, and he repeats the sound again at the loss of contact. You're only a hair away from being there still, he can feel how close you are—but you remain just beyond him again.
"My—my apologies, Commander... I-I—" you blurt out, voice still a little chill stuttered, "I didn't... I didn't mean to overstep."
He inhales steadily. He notes you're doused in human stress hormones; but he's acutely aware of a honeyed smell just below the surface. It's so suffocatingly sugary it's actually hurting his nose to scent the air. It's addling his thoughts, turning his focus to mist.
He can smell you failing to juggle all the reactions and thankfully rottenly settling for the one that makes you reek of mollasses.
"Come back, shut up," he hisses. "And stay still."
Sweet-stink radiates again before you swallow sharply.
There's an eternal breath of time in which he's about to go mad with anticipation, and the instant you're slotted against him again.
Some base urgency sends him frotting forward, and the thick, leaking head of him that peaks out the top of his zip brushes against a warm cunt; all thanks to that blanket of yours having slipped loose slightly, and lo, the blessed horrid consequence.
He'd live off the way your surprised gasp makes his nerves thrill.
"Is—" you wheeze, "Is that...?"
He grimaces, unsurprised you're ever stupider than you look. Recklessly, instead of lying—instead of saying 'no, it's a combat knife,' his mouth decides he's to act the most pathologically honest town crier alive.
"It," he intones sharply, before the words "...is your fault," leave him as a rushed hiss.
A belated pause wins out for a moment, and he's mortified as he realises what he's just confessed. There's a leaden feeling at the back of his throat. One option to recover the situation is that he could just hit you on the head. What'd be a shiner of a punch to a brother would be a terminal concussion to a baseline. Then, he'd tell the Primarch, oh yes, you died. Very sad. How? To shreds. To shreds you say? Truthfully, he can't really bring any actual conviction to the plan. He wouldn't. The notion is merely a hypothetical, in a perfect world where violence solved everything. Because if you die, Guilliman will send him to an Agri-world to be some peasant's plough-puller or someshit for a few centuries—and Cato's going to kill himself before he has to suffer that indignity. Uriel would never let him live it down. He's bound to suffer the same consequences, ultimately. Even if he's got no idea what an Astartes with a sex drive would be liable to be punished for. Oh, right. Corruption. So now, there's a credible witness to his flaw and one that his Father'll believe, worst of all, and... abruptly, you reply instead of scream in revulsion, your voice a mumbled little squeak as you say, "I didn't know—I mean, I didn't think—"
"Believe me, I am well aware you lack the capacity to think," Cato cuts in, and swallows down a snort at his own mean spirited joke. He's fucked, and for some reason he's suddenly further struck by the hilarity of the bastard, warp-spawn wiles of fate and chance. May as well be hung for the sheep as for a lamb, he decides.
Your breathing gains a shallow edge, and he feels you make as if to inch away again.
"I said not to move," He growls, and keeps you flush against him—holding you there by way of folding an arm across you.
"I just... uh," you reply, "I'm just..."
Your ass grinds back against him.
There's contact, your skin against the flushed, drooling head of him that feels painfully tender—and then you ruin it by speaking again.
"Curious, I suppose...? I was of the belief the Adeptus Astartes didn't..." your voice is soft, at least; slow and distracted, "Have an appetite for... this sort of thing?"
Cato momentarily stays fixated on the breathiness of your tone, and has to remind himself he's supposed to be angry at being robbed of silence—so he grumbles, "I told you to shut your trap," and promptly smothers a palm over your mouth.
You make a noise that sounds vaguely like a mumbled curse and settle, breathing hard through your nose to compensate.
Still, your rear presses back against him.
Cato takes the gesture at face value and fusses, roughly wrenching his bodyglove down to his thighs with his free hand.
Unconfined, his cock slaps the small of your back, and he manhandles you to readjust so it glides between your thighs instead.
Everything in place, he skews his hips forward, and his eyes roll back at the smooth, sublime drag of skin against skin. It's genuine perfection, wet and soft and molten.
The little hitched breaths you steal through your nose with each roll of his hips make him grind faster. Pressing closer with each, until the abhorrent, sticky sound of him steadily fucking against you is nigh deafening.
"I go in or I stay out," he says, and he can feel his molars grate against each other as he adds, "...or I can stop."
You shake your head furiously, or at least as much as the huge mitt on your chin, maw and jaw allows.
"Then decide," he snaps. "In?"
Cato hears the cartilage in your gullet move as you swallow dryly and nod.
Chuffed with your allowance compliance, he hums—and then it's his turn to hesitate.
When he draws his hand from your mouth, he curtly says, "Stay silent," and starts as if to tell you to arrange one way, then decides against it; dithering uncharacteristically. Then, rarer yet, Cato stumbles his words as he adds, "Move on to y-your front, then."
He doesn't know why he asked for the least preferred option when he'd been deliberating over the hypothetical for so long previously but nonetheless you, miraculously, comply without complaint. And despite himself he frustrates as you roll, his cock slipping away from between your thighs.
Draped in covers, he can't see much of you aside from the shape of you slowly arranging onto your hands and knees; before your chest sinks, and your ass stays up.
Like a rabid dog, he scrambles onto his haunches and scuds over behind you.
He's not entirely sure what to do first, and harrumphs.
In answer, your back arches even further in a dangerously luring bow, a display of willingness whorishness that turns Cato's thoughts to mush. Ass up and still in the pile, covered in blankets and rags, it's painfully easy to tug you from them just enough so that a decent portion of your raised lower half is exposed to him.
All he's able to comprehend the very next instant in some hind-brain, primitive way is a shapely ass, and a pretty pink cunt.
He grabs your hip, and the size comparison is so stark his head swims. With the span of one hand, he could palm a whole globe of your rear.
He does just that, and spreads you to take a nice long look.
You've a glossy sheen of clear slick that's starting to string down where it's collecting between your labia, and Throne—it's that. That's the sweet smell. And it's all for him—you're everything he's wanted.
Inspecting, he finds the hole leaking lubricant and a much, much smaller one below it—the vagina and then the urethra, he reasons by way of thinking back on a baseline biologis graphics; and, eyeing lower to a hooded fold, he finds a swollen little nub.
Pointedly, he's got a suspicion of what it is and turns his curiosity to it.
It's an easy target for his large thumb, even as slippery as your lust has made you, and—
A shaky little keen, then your knees pull together; body curling.
"Keep your damn legs apart," he grunts, wrenching them wide, and splaying a big palm on your ass to lift you into an arch again.
He's tempted to just bask in the glory of it all, grope, smack, lick—make you beg for it until he's sure you know he's in charge. Until you're as high strung for him as he's ever been for you. But he's frenzied, and well beyond being able to linger on those broader wants; not when he's got an Ambassador to fill.
He's aware of what your clit's really for now, and keeps rolling the pad of his thumb over it until you're squirming. It doesn't take long until your hole is visibly twitching. Nothing but a sloppy, wet mess of your own whorish excitement for him, as you ought to be. Cato bites back a longing sigh as he gets the delight of watching a fresh rivulet of slick string down your thigh.
And when he works up the gall, he jams that same thumb to the hilt in your cunt.
Your insides squeeze around it, and you start shaking, then. But it's not from the cold. No, anything but that. You're warm now, and he's deliriously happy to find you're as soft inside as the rest of you looks and feels. Warp damn him, he's no better than some slavering genestealer wretch fiending for its pound of flesh.
Your smaller baseline frame makes every part of him look huge in comparison. Even his thumb is big. And you're so much less—and the fact the disparity is so glaringly obvious plays havoc with his brain; but he's got an idea. An idea that he refuses to acknowledge sounding painfully like a boarding action to him.
With little tact, he sidles up and positions himself so his tip slots right against you, while stretching your opening with his thumb.
Lining himself up with his other hand, he nudges your entrance, smearing precum in with your wetness while inching forward; sliding his thumb out in tandem with pushing his cock in—and his efforts succeed.
Cato's transfixed watching the head of himself fill the gap, sliding in—and you let out a muffled yelp, still half-buried in the blankets like some stuck animal; your thighs juddering as you suck in air.
Honestly, he's glad you've smothered yourself like that, because he can't imagine keeping it together if you were actively watching him. He thinks the stark reality of it would have him run right out of the shack. Even the idea of having your pretty damning eyes on him makes him swoon sick.
With an over-eager roll of his hips, a shiver races up his spine. But he earns a cry from you.
He takes a deep breath.
There's a twinge of pain-smell and the vaguest hint of blood in the air, but it's impermanent compared to the amount of lust.
He pushes a little more, and you ripple internally around him; making a racketing, breathless noise—twitching before slacking, and then twitching again. A few perfect little moans escaping you at last.
Abruptly, all he's able to give a fuck about is the sensation of wet and hot, and how you're finally all his—it's a strangling fit, but it's satisfying a craving bone-deep. Infinitely better than his war calloused hands.
You feel sublime, and it's pure bliss finally getting what he's wanted for so very long.
All those rest cycles wasted furiously humping into his own clenched hand, all those hours of torment seething about your latest unintended slight against him.
He's so dazed by the new sensation he's massaging small circles with his fingers on your flank, humming lowly. Who would have known all he really needed was to hilt in a warm, velvety, absolutely sopping wet cunt to come around to you? Maybe you're not so bad afterall. That is, for an insufferable little cock-sleeve; but it's nothing Cato can't grin and bare. He can almost imagine tolerating further babysitting assignments, if it means he can use you as a hole to ram his frustrations into like this.
He continues petting you, absentmindedly.
But the involuntary mercy didn't stop you from jackknifing when he bucks in more—each little motion seating him deeper and deeper. He's stunned he fits. You're so... small, and Throne, he feels monstrous even fixating upon the disparity; nevermind the shiver that races up his spine at the thought.
He yanks you backward and you stop squirming for a moment.
When your wriggling starts up again, he holds you still with the sheer willpower only a neurotic control-freak could muster. He stops your motion, yes—but your insides also stop shivering around his cock and he's resentful of that.
Nonetheless, you make to move again then, keening and bothering him; but you're seemingly struck daft when he bottoms out at last, hitting your cervix. Your internal muscles tense on the intrusion, practically cramping around him, blinding him with ecstasy for a heartbeat as you clench down hard; and a squeak of surprise escapes you. Your legs lock stiff for a moment, air venting out your lungs in shock.
You garble out a sweet, hoarse curse that sounds more like a sob than anything.
Cato supposes the theatrics are what an orgasm on something his size does to a woman. And he finds he's appallingly keen to see and hear you do it again. Keen to feel it, too. He adjusts himself and grinds, making sure you're getting every bit he's got to give. It's no small feat of restraint from Cato to not simply drive into you with all his might like a hydraulic press.
Maybe that'll make your tight little hole cinch up again? He thinks you'd like that. No—no, you should be begging for him to keep fucking you. You should be thanking him while you're at it too, really. Thanking him for deigning to take you to begin with.
Your arch falls away to a prone slump with a whine, thighs trembling, leaving him straining forward to stay in you.
He is irate at your antics, now; and his retaliation betrays it.
Cato seizes your hips and yanks you back up his cock, shimmying you a little so he's nice and sheathed and stuffing you full, nigh folded under him. Warm cunt stretched taut around the base of his thick cock, like a perfect scabbard.
He's suddenly absorbed in watching your covered form consciously trying to counter the overwhelming forward mass of him starting to drive into you like he was part battering-ram.
"Better than all those limp-dicked, bastard lordlings you've let empty in you to even chance a cushion near my Primarch's table, hm?" His tone is little more than a scathing drawl, pulling almost entirely out of you just to dip the head of himself in.
You moan into the fabric smothering you, and he holds you with a controlled desperation.
"Answer me, you little shit."
He watches you nodding desperately beneath the cover a second later, failing to get an actual reply out around your huffing and puffing.
Cato groans, "Far keener for Astartes cock, aren't you?"
You nod again, needy.
"Throne, you're pathetic," he chides harshly, delighting in the soft whine of protest you make when pulls out to the tip one last time. "All that haughty bullshit, just to turn out to be so—so easy," then he's sliding back to the hilt and starting his rutting anew, grinding into that perfect spot that has your insides shiver around him again and again. "Isn't that right? This is all you're really good for?"
Beneath him, you're too much of an insensible mess to even think about answering; and somewhere in that depraved miasma of sound, he swears you're trying to say his name.
So, understandably, he inches forward on his knees and boxes you under him. Pinning you under the span of his bulk, two big hands firmly planted either side of your blanketed head.
He can see a few strands of your hair sticking out from beneath it and he can see the fog of your breath and the tip of your nose through a tented section, and only one of your hands—clawing out at the scraps of fabric.
"Prick-dumb animal," he sneers, flagrantly showboating; trying to sound as if he's not feigning lucidity and completely at the mercy of his lust.
He drops from his hands to rest on his elbows, manoeuvring a forearm under your head to prop your chin up. He's so bent over you that your ass is practically glued to his massive pelvis.
You can't stifle yourself now.
The sounds you make when he starts ploughing into you again are unrestrained and absolutely debauched. Practically music to his ears. He can feel your saliva smearing across his arm, and he's absolutely stupefied at the mantra of 'Sicarius, S-Sicarius, Sica-ah—rius—' you start panting. To say nothing of the keening whimpers that escape when you're not crying out for him. Louder with each thrust, and warp damn it all—his perfect memory is never going to let those gorgeous sounds go. He's going to fiend off you mewling his surname like a full dose of battle-chems until he fucking dies.
Cato groans and delights in the involuntary squeeze you make around his cock again; your hips skewing up into his own, meeting him.
He just wants one more thing—he wants—no, needs—he needs to hear you scream his name in that reedy voice. Telling him that you like him playing guard for you, and you're all his and you love hi—
Rather abruptly however, you're cinching down on his cock as you come again. Throne, your cunt may as well be Marneus' clenched powerfist the way you're wringing him for everything he's got. Crying out like you're inconsolable, and so painfully eager and—oh, fuck. He tries to hold off, but it's of little use. The dam cracks, and it's all too much for him far too quickly.
"You rotten w-whore—" the words leave him in between ragged, staggered pants, gritting his teeth even though it's achieving absolutely nothing. "Stop s-squeezing, I-I—"
He's finishing in you the next second and letting out a rough, unbecoming moan instead of the rest of his sentence; despite trying to muffle himself against your shoulder and save face. Emptying all his pent up spend as deep as he can inside you and rutting himself deliriously into oversensitivity. The simple feeling of it is a more profound experience than he can even begin to explain—and he's rendered daft. Fighting just to stay awake against the warm, coddling bliss running rife in his nerves as his muscles twitch.
Still trying to recuperate, he's drunk with afterglow for a few seconds. Head beside yours, sharing the same air and hurried breaths.
In his stupor, he notes that your hair smells nice even after everything. And he tuts softly, resting his eyes. Lulled by the soft sound of your hyperventilating evening out and the continuous, weak fluttering of your cunt around him, hot and tight, and still a perfect fit.
He almost understands why mortal men so frequently fought over baseline women, now.
Almost.
Because then you start squirming again.
Pointedly, he opens his eyes and begrudgingly lifts himself away, slipping free and leaving a big sloppy smear of combined fluids across your ass and thighs as he settles into a kneel.
You're still presenting yourself as Cato scrubs a palm across his face, and blinks slowly.
He glances down for a moment and swallows.
He's hard—still.
Just as ready to rut as he was to start with, despite the fact he's only just finished.
And, much like a beast in season, he genuinely contemplates another round—what would be the harm, anyways? He could be sliding himself back into you, right then, and he doubted you'd do anything but buck up to meet him. So much for some diplomatic prodigy. You're little more than a mewling wreck. And what better way to prove it than another wet layer of your mixed fluids on his cock?
A soft sound escapes you abruptly and he looks back to the place he's itching to slam back inside of.
A few fat rivulets of his cum drip out your abused entrance, but you're too well-screwed to even care, it seems.
He thumbs one of your folds aside and smiles smugly at the mess.
You poor thing, it must be so humbling to be put in your place. He hopes it felt good. Having your better's cum leaking out of you like a banner on a conquered fortress.
He's tempted to stuff his spend back into you and give you another load to drip. Let it leak down your thighs as you pad past his men on the flagship, that'd make them well aware of who you really admire—
At that brilliant jarring thought, blazing post-clarity arrived; an abrupt and unsettling feeling. The fact he'd even—even dignified your almost Slaneeshi-tier temptation—the fact he's raring to go again—he must already reek of your lust, and you of his—and Emperor have mercy, one quick scenting betrays everything, his men would tell their Father, and—you—you groan and worm yourself back under the blanket, likely truly feeling the chill now without his body to warm you.
The urge to say something becomes almost suffocating all at once, and Cato opens his mouth—just to be interrupted by a beep.
Hesitation seizes him, and he eyes his pile of half-frozen attire in the far corner.
Eighteen and a half seconds pass and it beeps again, indicating a second for every minute of arrival estimation.
The tracker beacon has finally done it's job.
But the matter of hastily cleaning up what insanity just happened becomes the real concern now.
Suddenly stuffed to the brim with adrenaline, Cato gets to his feet with Astartesian speed. He tries to take a step but sways, almost toppling. Looking down, he realises himself; and gingerly stoically waddles marches away from you, his bodysuit stuck around his knees. There's a cupboard in the other corner, covered in a frosted cobweb that looks a little like gossamer. Rifling through it provides him little. Most of it's contents are iced through, but a bottle of what stinks like absinthe is good enough, and he doesn't think it matters what he cleans up with. He definitely does doesn't look like a servitor on broken wheels as he scuds on his heels back beside your pile. And if he suffers any more injuries to his ego, they definitely don't include him bungling a kneel and being forced to wobble down on to his haunches. It's not his fault he's mentally accommodating for power armour that, currently, isn't there.
Pausing, he pokes the mound of scraps you're under, trying to rouse you.
When your answer to his 'kinder' effort results in you whining and curling up tighter, he settles for tossing any mercy out the window with a petulant grunt; and identifies the shape of one of your legs and tugs you half-free by your ankle like a speared fish, earning a yelp as the cold assaults you.
Grabbing one of the loose rags in your pile, he saturates it with spirit and scoops you up under the hips, before starting to wipe away the evidence.
You begin thrashing almost immediately when the rag makes contact. Then you're practically yowling, "It hurts, it h-hurts—wait, wait—" and okay—yes, maybe using high proof alcohol to clean the smell and slime of his cum off your freshly fucked hole wasn't his best idea. In his defence, you're one of the most stubborn baselines he's ever met, and you should learn to handle a little pain. Secondly, booze is the only thing that stays liquid at freezing.
"Enough with the bloody caterwauling, woman," he barks, effortlessly holding you steady despite your struggling. "It's not that bad, toughen the fuck up."
When he's done with you, he's actually remorseful of the situation. Certainly not his finest choice. Because now you're sniffling weakly, fussing about the residual stinging; and then you promptly scramble back under the blanket.
"There was nothing else I could use, okay?" He says sourly, scowling at the bundle of fabric you disappear into; before tossing the soiled rag he'd used to clean you into the fireplace to ignite.
He grabs another from the pile and douses it, wiping himself off—and at last, he's finally able to start to pull his bodyglove up over his hips. Wiggling and straining to fit the thick, skin-tight material over his still very much erect cock.
From the edge of his vision he can see you've peaked your head out to watch as he fixes the sternum latch in place.
He gives you a cursory glance, but nothing more.
He ultimately expects you to look away like the mouse you are—but no, what actually happens is worse. You just keep silently raking him with an expression that makes him feel like he's made of glass and every secret he's ever had or ever known is laid bare.
He can't stand it.
It makes Cato want to sneer at you fiercely in the hopes it would scare you off, remind you he's an exemplar of the Adeptus Astartes and shouldn't be stared at—something, anything except that look.
"Get up," he turns sharply and snorts.
The beeping is once every two and a half seconds, now.
Two and a half minutes, then.
"You let me fuck you," he bites out.
You're sitting now. Covered in one of the larger articles of rags. A tartan, fraying thing crumpled atop you, frowning and looking dejected. Then you open your mouth to speak but promptly stop. He can tell you're trying to form a diplomatic reply, and he grumbles, fuming.
"Tell anyone of this—" Cato's well aware he's being cruel as he adds, "—and I'll wring your little neck, Father's favourite pet or not."
You finally look away.
And he finds he can't stand that either.
So, to souse his bruised ego, Cato decides he's going to burn the shack down as soon as the transport lands and you're onboard.
He also decides he's going to burn that tacky formal tunic of his too, simply because he can.
175 notes · View notes
agirlwithglam · 5 months ago
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how to stop being so obsessed with them.
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heyyy bestieees! heres a few tips to stop you from being so obsessed with them cus honeyyy its just not worth it. it doesn't just have to be romantically btw!
"she's literally perfect.. like how??" <- affirmations!
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༄ ✬ move on! ༄ ✬
numero uno. move on. okay hear me out! there are 8 billion people in the world. (8 billion freeky deeking people). do yk how much that it? a lot of 0s. and i know for a fact that SO MANY of them would be thrilled to know you, to spend time with you, to love and respect you! if that 1 person out of 8 billion people doesn't seem to recognise your worth, so what?!
"oh but they're perfect and i just love them so much!" ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... sorry, what do you love again? the fact that they don't care enough to return a text, treat you right, make you feel loved?
"i just want them to love me back and treat me the way they treat others because they are so funny and always seem to make me and other people laugh!" oh ma lawd. ur not serious r u? you are?! okokok i won't make fun of you. i can relate to how that feels. but sweetheart, 8 billion. trust me, you'll find a lot more people who are twice as funnier and caring who will love you to the moon and back and make you feel like the most specialist person ever and massage ur crusty musty toes. jk about the last one- unless u want that?
༄ ✬ not everyone will know your worth. ༄ ✬
so asking questions like "but why can't they realise how great i am? or how funny i am? or how loving i am? i would do anything for them, why can't they realise that and treat me the same way back?" im sorry honey but the world doesn't work that way. if someone doesn't feel or treat you as if you're the most glamorous girl in the world, then you need to stop giving them sm energy and importance.
heres an analogy that i got from simonesquared on youtube: in gilmore girls, Rory has this super rich boyfriend Logan right? (who has the most cutest smile ever i might add) and he buys Rory a birkin bag. now to Rory, she doesn't realise the value of a bag like that! to her, its just another bag. she's grateful of course, but she doesn't fully realise the immense value this type of bag has.
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༄ ✬ have a life outside of them.༄ ✬
lemme repeat that. have. a. fleeping. life. outside. of. them. they should NOT be the center of your life or the cause of all your actions NUH UH ABSOLUTELY NOT! its okay to do SOME things with the thought of them, but that part is separate from the rest of your life. your life is your life, not theirs!!
this can mean going to the gym, working out, finding new hobbies, educating yourself, self care, etc etc! but don't go about your life, thinking about them. you go about your life thinking about YOU.
༄ ✬ stop chasing them. ༄ ✬
"gee, thanks vanilla. thats so helpful! how did i not think about that earlier?" im assuming thats sarcasm, but whateverr. okay so if they know that you're chasing them, that you're obsessed with them, yk what they'll think? they'll think that 'oh! this person is chasing me, so she really wants me. so she'll stick around. i dont really need to try too hard to keep her cus i know she'll stay. i'll explore my options in the meantime :)'
GIRL do not so available like this! BE BUSY (which relates to the point before). once you glow up, work on your life, not taking it so seriously, and just being happy and enjoying this beautiful gift of life, they will start to think: 'oh! this person (you) is actually quite fabulous. i better try to make her feel happy/ be friends with her before i miss this awesome opportunity!'
cus girl, cmon, you've got things to do, places to be, and people to talk to. i've got goals and dreams and my bucket list. you don't have the time to sit here and be crazy obsessed. so like, if they just leave, um okay and? "yes, and?" what about it? am i meant to be bothered? likerrr okay, byee? i mean, i've got a lot of things to do so i could try to fit in a "help i need you" session between my pilates class and my cooking class? jk <3
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༄ ✬ give yourself the damn love. ༄ ✬
why are you obsessed with them? why are you head over heels for somebody who literally couldn't care less? its because they have something that you feel like you're lacking.
is it the fact that they always seem so happy and laughing-y with people around them? that they get super high marks on their test? they are attractive? they have a high status? money? what is it?? often, we can actually give these things to ourselves. some, easier than others. but not impossible. if you really wanted to, you would get up, dust yourself up, and give yourself the love you crave. What you want in others, give to yourself first.
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More resources:
How to stop comparing yourself & feel fulfilled without needing external validation.
Thewizardliz: becoming selfish was the best thing i did
Lumma Aziz’s videos
398 notes · View notes
ifimdreaming · 26 days ago
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goodbye
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luke hughes x reader
a/n: this is so dramatic for absolutely no reason but i also just experienced this and i am super emotional. established relationship, essential luke leaving to play devils hockey, unsaid but reader is canadian so, long distance - i didnt edit this and the endiing is abrupt but i didnt want to continue it anymore lol.
w/c: 1.0k
-
Luke waited for you to be the one to say something but you waited for him. You knew it would be hard to say goodbye like this but you insisted on waiting until you were actually at the airport seconds from when he really was leaving.
Silence falls as you near Lukes gate and you refuse to speak the words. Luke tilts his head at you and you shake your head in response, silently disagreeing with the fact of him leaving you indefinitely for work.
“Just come give me a hug” He says as he pulls you in, both of you refusing to verbally say the words goodbye.
Luke grabs hold of you and you knew you would not be letting go first. Your arms wrapped around his back, you bury your face in his chest as tears stream down silently but steadily. 
“I will come back when I can. And I know that's vague but I'm making a promise to you. Ok?” Luke says into your ear and he doesn't wait for you to answer, knowing you are too wrecked to respond, “It will be a lot different and I know that. But I'm coming back and I'll be counting down the days until I do.” He adds.
You nod your head hoping he understands that you want to say how much you love him, how much you'll miss him and don't want him to leave - but even looking him in the eyes is hard to do.
Luke lifts your head and pulls his sleeve over his hand to wipe your tear soaked face before placing a soft kiss on your swollen lips. You softly smile but the tears don't leave your eyes, and Luke just pulls you in closer to him, hoping to gentle the blow of him needing to be on a plane  in T-minus 5 minutes. 
“dont go” you whisper, as the bustle and constant beeping, and voices on the airport intercom, make you desperately regret waiting until now to genuinely say goodbye to your boyfriend. 
All week you have been gearing up and preparing for this goodbye, youd think about leaving him notes in his luggage or visiting him at practice ‘just because’, youd think about giving him presents of yours for him to bring with him to new jersey, or buying those long distance relationship bracelets that you can press a button on and buzz each others bracelets when youre thinking about them.
But none of that happened. Ultimately you were too scared of what lay ahead in the future to put your mind on enjoying what time you had left together. And you sure as hell were not going to be wasting time preparing gifts for him when you could be spending time with him while you still could. So you did nothing. 
You waited until the very last second to say goodbye and it was the worst mistake you could've made. 
Luke prepared for this. He said I love every single day this week, multiple times a day so that you could hear him say it to you face to face. He told you how much he'd miss you every single day, he told you what his hopes were for when he'd be back, and most importantly, he said goodbye to you. 
-
“And drinks are on us tonight so I will bring those out to you right away, anything else you two need?” the kind waitress says as she brings our wine glasses to our little table in the corner of a mostly empty restaurant, the one Luke reserved the night before he left. 
“This looks beautiful, thank you so much.” you reply kindly as she walks away
All you can do is smile and take in how much luke adores you, at least enough to do all this just for you.
“thank you luke for this…why do you spoil me?” you ask him with a grin as you begin eating your food, not being able to wait any longer with how delicious everything smells.
“Because I love you.” he says as he joins you in eating his perfectly cooked steak and potatoes.
“And because i need to say goodbye…properly” he adds as he is still chewing.
Luke's eyes fall to yours as he watches your expression change from bliss to sadness within a second. 
“and i know you're going to try and stop me but please don't” he adds.
“I love you. I have for years and I am so thankful that you love me back because I don't know what I would do without you in my life. And I know it sucks that I have to leave for work and even I feel like I'm choosing my career over our relationship which I know is not the truth but I still feel so guilty and so selfish. But that's because I love you.” he says carefully and you begin tearing up as he speaks.
“Itll be hard to be apart. And im sorry. But I needed to say a proper goodbye to you because I need you to remember it while we’re apart.” Luke adds and he reaches across the table to grab your hand in his. 
“I love you” he says
“I love you” you whisper out 
“And I know you wont say goodbye now” He adds with a chuckle 
“You know me too well, Luke Hughes” you say with a laugh  as you wipe the tears from your eyes and whisper curse words under your breath, not wanting to have cried this much tonight - or ruin your makeup.
-
“Im sorry” you say as luke holds your hands in his
“Im sorry I practically ignored you this week and refused to even acknowledge that this is happening. But it is. And Im sorry I didn't say goodbye.” you continue as your sobs almost make it impossible to speak.
“You are saying goodbye. You're saying it now.” Luke says as he kisses you again and for the last time before letting you go
The fact that this goodbye was indefinite made it feel a whole lot worse than you thought it would.
But this was just the beginning.
-
-
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tsukasalvr · 1 year ago
Note
Idk if your requests are open or not AAHH! But if they are:
(Possible TW in my request for mentions of depression, anxiety, commiting di3 joke)
Could you do a reader with bad depression and anixety. And maybe one day reader makes a joke about 0ffing themself and then they dont show up to school for a few days
Characters I would prefer(from TBHK): Kou, Teru, Hanako, Akane(boy)
You can add more if you like! :)
Im sorry its not very specific, this is my first time requesting something
Also sorry i know topics like these are difficult for some people <3
depressed!reader who makes su*cidal jokes
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Anime/fandom: Tbhk
Characters: Kou Minamoto, Teru Minamoto, Hanako, Akane Aoi
Warnings: I don’t proofread, depressed reader, mention of suicide
A/n: just got broken up w by my pookie wookie☹️💔
Tbhk masterlist | Main masterlist
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Kou Minamoto
Is immediately put off by what you’re saying and is immediately concerned, and gets even more concerned once you get together and just stares nervously at you while stuttering, not knowing what to say
“That’s so embarrassing, if that were me I would kill myself no doubt! Being so stupid like that, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself!” You casually said while looking at a post on your phone.
“O-oh… umm…” Kou is at a loss for words sometimes and tries to brush it off by moving onto something happier to distract you from thoughts like those
When you make a joke that’s one day too far he genuinely seems so much more concerned and ask if you’re okay. He gets so worried about you that it’s best not to make jokes like that near him.
If you don’t show up the next day, he gets worried and is immediately trying to leave school early even though he knows Teru will berate him later for it, he needs to see you’re okay and when he arrives to your house and sees you are, he’s very serious about not making jokes like those again and is invites you to his house more often to distract yourself and is willing to help you get help
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Teru Minamoto
Gives you a nervous smile when you joke about suicide and even when you you’re dating he still gives you an obvious fake smile to not hurt your feelings. He knows that outright saying that if you need someone talk to talk to can be annoying sometimes so he’ll try to subtly let you know he’s there
Whether it’s from talking about a topic of a documentary of a tragic life of some celebrity and all they needed help to having Kou telk you that you’re part of the family and that you can tell them anything when you’re over at their house
“I can’t stop messing this up! God I really should’ve taken those pills when I had the chance, what the hell!” You said angrily at the fact you couldn’t get the string through the small hole in the needle.
Teru could only smile at you, he never says anything to your ‘jokes’, but then he stops and just goes to frowning hoping that you’re not being serious
When you don’t show up the next day, he’s not super worried and just assumes you’re late but sends you messages. But after a few hours the messages become more frequent and by the end of the school day he’s running to your house scared. When he sees you’re alright, he’s pissed and says enough is enough and he’s not taking anymore jokes and is instead going to help you
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Hanako
He might laugh at your jokes, but it’s only so he doesn’t worry you. He’s not an unfamiliar when it comes to stuff like this and he knows you might now want to talk about it right away so he’s fine with trying to take it slow
On the inside though, his ghostly heart is scared that you’re it joking and you’re actually being serious. He can’t bear the thought of you dying—and especially dying this way so he keeps a close eye on you and has Kou and Yashiro even make sure that you’re doing okay
“God, I’m so stupid and useless” you say with a laugh as you look at your test result and shove the paper back in your bag
Hanako stares at you, and lets out a laugh that’s believe enough. He’s conflicted on what he should do, should he ask how you’re doing? What if you lie to him? Would you even want to talk to him?
It seems as if his worries have come true when you didn’t show up to school the next day and asks if Yashiro or Kou have seen you at all and to message you on those weird electronic things. Yashiro only agrees to go to your house when Hanako asked because she too was worried about you. Hanako waits impatiently the next day and sees you and you tell him you were just feeling sick. If he could, then Hanako would definitely cry and basically forces you to promise to tell him if anything is wrong with a scared and worried expression on his face
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Akane Aoi
You’re the most precious person in his life so he takes everything very serious when it comes to you. A paper cut? He’s getting ready to call an ambulance for you and is frantically asking you if you’re okay.
So joking about such topics near him immediately alarms him and hea on full protective mode with asking if you’re joking or not. He takes everything you say seriously, he cares about you a lot so to see you laugh about it, hurts him a little
“What if I jump out this window right now? I really do want to do this test!” You whined and looked over at the window that was right next to where you were sitting.
Akane had a prominent frown on his face, he knew you weren’t exactly mentally okay and you’re jokes were becoming more and more frequent
He’s on full panic mode when you don’t show up to school the next day and the worst possible outcomes are immediately coming to mind. He hopes he’s wrong and is blowing up your phone and is willing to mess up his perfect attendance streak for you, he’ll fix it later. But when he sees you overslept and your phone died because wig wasn’t charged, he’s disappointed. He knew it was getting worse if you dying was what came to mind when you didn’t show up so he pledges to help you
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quimichi · 1 year ago
Note
NSFW [ SFW if NSFW isn’t okay- ] Malleus Hc? [ male reader if your comfy with tat, if not gn is good too :3 ] ignore if your not taking requests or this isn’t okay-
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. . . . . . . . . ╰──╮MY DEAREST ╭──╯ . . . . . . . . .
(N)SFW MALLEUS BF HCS
Malleus x Gn!Reader
A/n: I do male reader, but since you said gn reader is fine too I did gn reader! I hope it's ok but obviously I can still do a male reader ♡
SFW
: ̗̀➛ first of all, damn you're lucky like---
: ̗̀➛ the fact that you're now in a relationship with the most powerful being of the school is mad scary for so many. After all, you're just a magicless human.
: ̗̀➛ but you are so much more to Malleus himself, and he takes a pot of pride in being your partner, boyfriend sounds so...weird to him
: ̗̀➛ Lilia btw is a super proud mom
: ̗̀➛ i have the add the adorable gargoyle stuff because it's a Malleus thing. He always takes his time and is open minded to youe interest, so obviously you are too! Whatever it might be he will try and study it to understand you better
: ̗̀➛ please help him tho, he may get a little lost in places of the internet if he ever trys to learn more on there
: ̗̀➛ insist on you two sleeping together. And INSISTS that you and Grim move to his dorm, his room to be specific, because the conditions you live in? We don't talk about them---
: ̗̀➛ once he got a taste of cuddling, it was over for you. He can and will get clingy at night, pulling you into his chest so he can hold you
: ̗̀➛ very protective and somehow greedy. Your attention is his, his animalistic dragon side may come out there but you can deal with it, so far that is-
: ̗̀➛ gets you way to expensive presents, mostly with pretty gems. Things like jewelry, or even other decorative pieces. All in your favorite color(s)
: ̗̀➛ loves to take late night walks with you, having your arms linked while slowly walking beside each other enjoying not only the atmosphere but each other's company
: ̗̀➛ will also read to you if you ever ask for it. Having you falling asleep right there in his arms ro his soothing voice really does sound like a dream
: ̗̀➛ lol he literally told Sebek to also protect you from any harm that comes if he can't be around you (which is like so rare he's glued to your side)
: ̗̀➛ baby can't use his phone right and would think that if he speaks to his phone with the chat open it will magically send the text to you, like you always do with voice mails---
: ̗̀➛ or he has his front camera open and doesn't know how to turn the view so he literally turns the whole phone and trys to blindly press the button
: ̗̀➛ he's so cute stfu
NSFW
: ̗̀➛ this guy is huge like---massive. You have to be around his size to really take it down good-
: ̗̀➛ rip to my fellow small people out there
: ̗̀➛ obviously he gives off big dick energy and this is what he has, a big dick. Like 9 inches, in cm that would be 22
: ̗̀➛ it's average in thickness but the length...damn: ̗̀➛ like i said before very protective, also meaning possessive. He will mark you up, with his smell and with any other sign he can. That's why he gets you the jewelry too. And also hickey's
: ̗̀➛ if you dont like those, he won't do any of them he respects you to much for this to push you into anything that you are not willing to at least try. Same with showing them, if you don't like people to know this way, he is very okay with this
: ̗̀➛ since he does love and respect you a lot, like literally adore and being obsessed with you, you will have the final word of anything. He is willing to try everything out of curiosity and will maybe bring something up himself, but won't MAKE you do anything. A no is a no after all
: ̗̀➛ so a no for him is definitely degration, like sry people who like it but no-
: ̗̀➛ [FEM REDER] a little yandere but would baby trap you at some point in life cause he knocks you up all the time with everything he has. So in the end, you are truly only his
: ̗̀➛ [MALE READER] would also let you take control once in a while. Yes, he is dominant for 99% but if you are also, just ask and take control he won't bite unless you want to, bite back even. Literally ruin this man's insides he will love it ♡
: ̗̀➛ seeing you so...rounded with his cum just makes him keep going, if you let him
: ̗̀➛ also, belly bulge. It's hypnotizing seeing himself going in and out of you, in and out...
: ̗̀➛ can go for so many rounds, because the Stamina he has is insane. Like he turns when you star begging for his dick inside you
: ̗̀➛ really loves to hear you, he knows you're obsessed with his voice but so is he with yours. He won't only whisper those dirty but also sweet things into your ear, making you weak. He wil also make you say things you were never expecting to say, without him forcing you. Same with the noises he can draw out
: ̗̀➛ He makes you shameless without even realizing it and it makes his brain go brrr
: ̗̀➛ to a point where Lilia heard it more than once-
573 notes · View notes
revalition · 1 month ago
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OCT 8 - VOLITION
Hold yourself together. Keep your Morale up.
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I had to resize this image 3 times to get tumblr to take it... it is also past midnight here, but the day change doesn't really count if I haven't gone to sleep yet, so :)
Volition. My love. my favourite skill. please enjoy. I also drew the volitions of some of my mutuals!! because I love you guys and your volitions very much (holding them gently in my hands). hopefully you guys dont mind and I didn't mess them up too badly
anyway. uhm. I'm much too tired to write anything super coherent right now. please write tags for me or write comments so I can see them when I wake up haha
and! there is a LOT under the cut. like, way more than any of the other days. it is giant. be very careful expanding it <3
ok here goes... I'm typing shorter ones out and screenshotting big ones
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VOLITION - Stop, you're only making it worse for him -- you never help with *anything*.
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- Rare volition being rude to other skills!!! it only happens under pressure, too
KIM KITSURAGI - "What else could she have done? Lie? She saw there was no way to lie and get away with it."
DRAMA - You would have caught it.
VOLITION - Like hell you would have -- remember?
- you tell him volition!!
SUGGESTION - What is *wrong* with you? Why did you ask to be connected to her? Who *does* that?! Act professional now.
VOLITION - *You* told him to do that stupid thing...
- rare volition callout!!
YOU - Can I trust that guy?
VOLITION - A little. They're all still of limited use, interpreting things to the best of their ability. Maybe they add flair or something? I wouldn't know. I don't add flair.
- this is one of my favs haha. you don't need flair, love, it's ok
VOLITION - Ouch.... That's like twenty points of pride-damage right there, buddy.
- This is after Sylvie turns you down to get coffee. (and you do suffer a point of morale damage haha). him calling you buddy is so funny. it's always mildly condescending too!
- here's the other two:
VOLITION - You're no titan of Volition, buddy. He's got you in a fork. Sit down or leave.
VOLITION - You're a little more moralist now, buddy. A little more *normal*. Even if you didn't want to be.
YOU - "Cryptid extravaganza? I like the sound of that."
KIM KITSURAGI - "And I *don't*. Just one."
VOLITION - Or he'll be *disappointed* in you.
ENCYCLOPEDIA - Whooh... tough choice there.
- volition knows it's truly the most terrible thing haha
VOLITION - An enormous expenditure of willpower to build up strategic semen reserves? You had me at *willpower*. Let's do it!
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Life is all about pleasure... why deny it?!
- these two are hilarious. poor echem. but also volition, honey, nono...
- the game implies consequences when increasing your skills too high but you don't see it with all of them. Volition's one you don't really see much downside to, but you can just. Imagine it here. Him pressuring you to do something stupid, just for the sake of it being difficult. Surely that's not healthy??
- I do think Volition has a lot of issues. I'll get into some more of them later though!!
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- but just... Harry wanting to do something that *is* a test of willpower and Volition is completely uninterested. But the semen retention thing is okay? sigh
- and then after that, he's just like. nope. we're not going to not swear :)
- he's so stupid sometimes. also it's absolutely hilarious to me that you can pick the "..." option over and over and Volition will match it forever. You simply cannot out-will your own willpower. It's just not possible.
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- I actually live for Volition being the singular voice of reason. Look at the others all chiming in!!
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- this one too, Volition being the only one trying to stop it! Why are they all piling on?? Composure not you too >:(
- I had excessively high Volition *and* Pain Threshold in my first run and the two of them!!! PT gets very self destructive at high levels, so seeing the relentless push and pull of PT and Volition was so good.
- This line from the description -> "Cool for: Sane People, Well-Adjusted Cops, The Non-Suicidal" yes it's cool for them, sure, but it's incredibly!!! important for NOT these people! Because Volition doesn't make you sane, or well-adjusted, or non-suicidal. He's just the one voice of reason in there trying to veer you away from making irreversibly bad decisions.
VOLITION - She tries to hide it, but some *great doubt* is spreading within her. There is a crown slowly cracking above her head.
- I need to talk about this line. Just. Volition acknowledging the existence of Joyce's own Volition (which he refers to as a crown!!!) cracking! the *great doubt* spreading and cracking apart the crown! hghh I live for any and every depiction of volition cracking apart when morale gets low and this is absolutely one of them.
AUTHORITY - Weren't you warned to *not* go down this path?! And yet you *still* go and do it...
VOLITION - Just because you *can* doesn't mean you *have to* say everything that comes to mind. Back out before the situation escalates.
- these two's dynamic is very funny to me. I love when they work together (but I also love when they fight! fight fight fight!)
VOLITION - Don't ask, don't look, don't do *anything* here. Just go away. Get back to work.
- "Just go away" ugh my guy is fighting for his life here to get you away from the cigarette and alcohol counter in the Frittte
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- hghhk Volition. this is a Challenging passive check too (the second one, to hang up). *one* chance, that's all he has in him. It's not possible at all in the dream, no matter how high your Volition stat is. It's just not something he can do. But here, with the distance of the payphone between you and possibly real consequences, he's able to manage one chance.
- (also did anyone see the post about the payphone conversation possibly being entroponetic crosstalk?? I could talk about that for way too long. but I am getting sidetracked)
YOU - "Yeah, I'm done talking about her. I don't want to think about her anymore."
RHETORIC - What a strange choice of words...
EMPATHY - Caustic, overflowing with negativity.
VOLITION - That can't be healthy. What's happening here? Why do you keep coming back to this window?
YOU - Nothing, everything's okay.
VOLITION - But it isn't. And you shouldn't come back to this anymore. This should be the last time. Stop talking about that damn window, please.
- this one too
VOLITION - Throw it away. Please.
- I need to talk about this. Volition dutifully directs you away from all the reminders of Dora. He does everything in his power to stop the final dream from happening.
- And I get it. He's trying to protect Harry. Because Harry isn't mentally stable right now and it could endanger the case. but... at least, when the final dream happens Kim is (usually) there when you wake up. And if all went well, you get to go back to your precinct, and take Kim with you. And Harry has support.
- If the dream doesn't happen... it will happen eventually. There are a million reminders in Martinaise in the span of a week, imagine what Jamrock is like. It's an inevitability. And then you're taking the chance that the dream happens at a time when Harry is much worse off. Maybe he's alone. Maybe Kim left, maybe he was let go from the force.
- The dream could happen at a better time too, of course. we probably all imagine harry picking up the pieces after martinaise and his life finally taking a turn for the better. and I imagine this is what Volition had in mind, by delaying the dream. Maybe it can be delayed for a long time, long enough.
- but it's a huge risk and I just... don't know if he's making the right choice here. keeping important information about Harry's past, which has shaped his relationships and life considerably, in a box so it can't hurt him
- yeah. anyway...
YOU - What if I don't want to ask questions?
REACTION SPEED - You're a cop, Harry. It is *unnatural* of you not to want to ask questions.
VOLITION - You don't have to. No one is forcing you to be a cop.
- Volition??? sometimes this guy makes no sense, he's so funny. I really think he occasionally just does something for the sake of being defiant
EGG HEAD - "Please. Please?" The young man smiles at you widely, bright and innocent as the summer sun.
VOLITION - His pleaful smile is disarming, but you can withstand it's glorious assault, if you just put your heart into it.
- why? why?? don't turn down egg head ever!
VOLITION - Alright, come on now. If *he* hasn't said anything about your lack of pants, no one will. You're only hurting yourself by not wearing them...
- this one is so funny. I love that he lets you know he *knows* you're trying to get a reaction and you're not going to get one!!
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- yes volition, stop himmm
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - How very astute of you! This renders it ineffectual. You should look for a *whole* cigarette. Or better yet -- an entire pack! Strike that, a CARTON! Make sure they're all healthy and able-bodied, then smoke them all.
VOLITION - Or -- you could *not* do that. No one is making you.
- volition as usual trying to stop you from picking up bad habits... I just love the way he talks. he's not even telling you not to, just voicing his disapproval in a rather passive way
INTERFACING - Wow, the gods of mass production have made this alcohol container *laughably* easy to open. A child could have done it.
VOLITION - I don't know about this...
- he still doesn't outright tell you not to drink it... :(((
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Fine. We're not worried... you'll crawl back to this bottle soon enough. We'll give you another chance. Booze *always* gives you *another* chance.
SUGGESTION - Yes, it's *merciful* that way. It's your friend. Come back to it, we're all rooting for you to.
VOLITION - Not *all* of us...
- he's the only one rooting for you to not drink it!! he can't stop you. but he is supporting you in the only way he's able.
VOLITION - No. You *can* stop. Just wade through the hell. Month after month. Year after year -- you against the nothingness. It's possible, because *time* is possible.
- He can encourage you!!
YOU - "I *will* stop drinking."
MEASUREHEAD - "THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE. THE GAME OF *SHAH-MAT* YOU PLAY AGAINST THE GUL'S TRICKS IS UNWINNABLE. THE DAYS, THE WEEKS, THE MONTHS WILL WEAR YOU OUT. THE OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP IS INCAPABLE OF LONG TERM LUCID THOUGHT."
VOLITION - NO.
- volition!!! <3 that's all he needs to say.
HORRIFIC NECKTIE - This is it. I'm gonna hit the ground and burn away now. Most of the people in this yard are gonna die -- if not all. Probably you too. It's a COMPLETE DISASTER.
PAIN THRESHOLD - Get ready for a world of pain, man.
VOLITION - No. Not a disaster. Weave this into the story of you. Walk out of its *ruins*. Save those who still can be saved -- *I'm* on your side.
ESPRIT DE CORPS - And the lieutenant too. And the men behind your back, drawing their weapons... you can live. You can get out of this.
- hnngh. this one is among my favourites too. my amazing 1 int run also had 1 motorics. at this point I had failed the rhetoric check to save ruby, failed the logic check to save lizzie, and now failed the spirit bomb throw too and was about ready to cry. Volition's quiet reassurance was very important to me in that moment. EdC too, and I did save Kim.
HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Your hand trembles as you scratch at your cheek... oh no, that's not how a grown man shaves!
YOU - Leave it for now.
HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Thank god, I would have cut your throat.
VOLITION - The centipede is exaggerating -- people don't actually cut their own throats when they're shaving. At least not accidentally.
- centipede!!! it's such a funny nickname. alternatively
HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Your hand trembles as you scratch at your cheek... oh no, that's not how a grown man shaves!
YOU - This isn't sharp enough. Scrape harder.
HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Stop, for crying out loud! You're gonna cut your own throat.
VOLITION - There's no way to salvage this.
- these guys are hilarious. why is volition even watching this mess? 'there's no way to salvage this.' ??? I'm not even sure if he's referring to you or H/E... he must be so tired.
ENDURANCE - You feel like you're about to faint and fall off the swing. Your hands get clammy and the air tastes sour to breathe.
HALF LIGHT - Oh god, Harry! Oh god, Harry, what did you do...?!
VOLITION - No! Just nope. Say no to this, Harry.
- more of this!! >:( of volition trying to just avoid anything painful. wake up man.
LOGIC - Everything is so pretty and red -- you and Leo look like brothers as you glance around with similar childlike wonder.
VOLITION - Keep it together, no need to show your wonder.
- why? :( it's not hurting anyone. legendary difficulty passive for volition, high levels of volition are sometimes questionable. I love collecting all these instances of volition making weird suggestions. it's like when people point out really weird things Kim does, that you don't really notice as weird because he does it so calmly and confidently.
VOLITION - Huh... no, Mr. Conclusion. You're always kind of limited in your analytical abilities. That's not *her* fault. But still...
- volition: you're kind of limited in your analytical abilities... meanwhile logic and viscalc and ency calling you stupid and brain damaged lol. vol is so gentle about it!!
- then again...
VOLITION - ...no? He's not going to show up? I'm sorry, your lie detection isn't working. It's not her doing, he's just totally inept. It looks like you're also an idiot. But that's not her fault.
- lol.
RHETORIC - This is good. Clear the air first -- between you two -- then move on to questions.
VOLITION - No, it's not good. It's the opposite of that. This will let her dictate the terms of your...
RHETORIC - Shush. I can't hear what she's saying.
- no. don't ever cut off or shush volition ever again
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- >:(
YOU - No-no-no-no...
INLAND EMPIRE - Yes, yes, yes, yes.
VOLITION - No-no, we're not starting with that. Not now. Not this time. This thought is over.
- volitionnnn... ily. my own volition also cuts off dangerous lines of thought for me. I think he's got to be constantly vigilant, in order to be so good at it. must be exhausting :(
YOU - "Can't promise that. I might attack him again." [Leave.]
KIM KITSURAGI - The lieutenant groans, but doesn't say anything.
VOLITION - That's right, you *should* do it again! It's the *last* thing he'll be expecting.
- uhm. not sure that's a good idea!!
VOLITION - You're too weak to say 'no' now. Waking up is the worst part. Maybe somewhere down the line you could decline...
- referring to declining the speed. all volition fails are very sad
VOLITION - Yes, look at yourself. What do you see?
YOU - Just a sorry stack of shit...
VOLITION - Yeah, didn't even know they stack shit *that* sorry.
- beautiful, rare volition scolding you!!!! after you disregard his advice and don't apologize to kim after the church fail. he's on your side, but he also knows he needs to tell you that this wasn't okay.
VOLITION - First the investigation, now this... how many more things do you have to fuck up?
- this one too! same scenario. this is a difficulty 16 (Godly) check...
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- yes this again. it just needs to be in here. the volition panic attack. if this volition passive doesn't fire, you take no volition damage. it's completely self-inflicted :(((
PAYPHONE - The headset lands in the cradle with a clank. There it sits -- still warm from your hand. You have no idea what just happened.
(heal 2 endurance and 2 volition)
- if you hang up the phone before dora picks up!
VOLITION - He subdues the feeling. Dusts himself off and moves on. So should you. There will be other chances.
(heal 2 volition)
- if Kim misses getting a picture of the phasmid
HORRIFIC NECKTIE - The necktie is guiding you through this. It's your spirit animal, both your nemesis and friend. Suddenly a feeling of ease brushes through you -- you're fine again.
(heal 2 volition and 1 endurance)
AUTHORITY - That... was the most honourable thing anyone has ever done, Harry.
(heal all volition)
- very special incidences of healing more than 1 volition at once!! the fact that healing/damaging morale is just directly called heal/damage volition in the variable naming is. yeah. I think about it constantly. does it hurt him? I think it does. and he never says anything about it (unlike endurance!) he just bears with it quietly.
VOLITION - In honour of your shit, lieutenant-yefreitor. Which you kept *together* in the face of total, unrelenting terror. Day after day. Second by second.
INLAND EMPIRE - DETECTIVE
ESPRIT DE CORPS - ARRIVING
AUTHORITY - ON THE SCENE
- obviously this one has to be in here. funnily enough, in my second playthrough I had 2 PSY but everyone had been bumped up enough that they all fired except authority... I ended up throwing a point into authority and retrying the dialogue so it could be complete haha
VOLITION - What? I thought you had your shit together! This is nearing a complete meltdown! Stop it!
- volitionnn :( if you don't stop you have a panic attack, so I guess he's only trying to help
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- this is too funny. volition honey, you absolutely do add flair too
YOU - Oh, you mean Cuno?
VOLITION - Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner!
- yup, absolutely no flair. Super. Tip-top!
VOLITION - These guys are compromised. She's got them singing along to her tune. The little bleeps and bloops you trust for info -- you can't trust them anymore.
- it would be a crime to not include the bleeps and bloops in here! why does he call them that?? haha
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- rare instance of volition not being able to stop the disaster!
INLAND EMPIRE - Your surroundings are undisturbed. While you slept, you were alone. Now that you're awake -- you're still alone.
HALF LIGHT - Get the fuck out of here. Fuck this place, fuck this world, fuck this life, fuck this body -- just fucking go.
SAVOIR FAIRE - The sheets are stained red. Your blood's been running again. Keep it together. Just get out of here and finish this fucking thing.
VOLITION - Harry... I know there's not much to say -- but if nothing else, just remember that you've made it this far. And it's just a bit farther now. Let's finish this.
- this is just. it's awful, if you have the final dream all alone. but at least you have volition with you
DICK MULLEN AND THE MISTAKEN IDENTITY - Dick Mullen was made to crack skulls and solve cases. It's who he is. He could no more stop being a detective than a tiger could cease to be a predator in the night.
VOLITION - You're no tiger, though, Harry. You're a man. It's your curse to have to choose.
- I like this one.
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - That sugary black rum stain on the counter makes you teary-eyed with joy. It's almost touching how syrupy and sticky it is. How long have you been up already?
YOU - Not now.
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Oh *excuse me*, do you have something better to do than lust for sweet syrupy rum and lemonade? With a twist of lemon? Maybe lime? Maybe who cares, just rum?
VOLITION - Yes, you do have something better to do. Stop drooling over that stupid rum stain and go. Before it's too late.
- this is a challenging (difficulty 12) check! it's very difficult to resist the sticky rum stain I guess
YOU - Give up.
LOGIC - There we go. Your mind is a relaxed muscle. It's so nice and easy to give up, isn't it? On the downside -- you have no idea what you were supposed to do now. I could have *debriefed* you.
VOLITION - Blissful idiot -- say something. You've stood there for too long.
- blissful idiot
VOLITION - Don't be an idiot and say it. In this day and age, of all times. It won't end well.
- once again, volition pushing you away from the bi-curious thing. :( he just wants to keep you safe, but it comes at a cost.
- you can't just wrap harry in bubblewrap, volition. he'll never grow
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- volition absolutely saving the day here. do NOT say it harry! authority's advice is SO hit or miss
VOLITION - It's time to leave it be. You're about to make a child cry. Are you proud of yourself?
YOU - Damn right I am! Proud as the Lion of Serber.
VOLITION - Excuse me, I'm not sure I heard that properly...
- volition ily. he has to deal with so much.
VOLITION - Should we? He's *nice*. I don't like *nice*.
- this is so funny. he's very suspicious.
VOLITION - Look at it, detective. And be ashamed. Until you make it right by *legally purchasing* that raincoat, I'll make sure you feel guilty every time you see it.
- YES YES conscience volition!!
YOU - Close the carabiner.
SLEEPING DOCKWORKER - The sleeping dockworker has little to say about your actions. He remains silent.
VOLITION - You're not 100% clear what you did here was *right*, but to hell with it...
- only sometimes!!
VOLITION - I can't restrain this one. The need to *cop* is too strong. You just need to ask it.
- why are you trying to restrain copping??? this guy, sometimes. he's so stupid (affectionate)
VOLITION - That's it. I'm calling it. Kim is beyond compromised.
- uhm. volition completely overcompensating with the compromised skills is quite funny. once drama wakes up, he does it too
VOLITION - See? It's oddly moderate. Probably compromised.
- oddly moderate now means compromised??
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- this is it. this is volition's only comment on this disastrous authority fail. he makes no attempt to stop it!!
VOLITION - Being Cuno's pig has a steadying effect on your hand. Go with the flow, man...
- volition's so silly sometimes
DAMAGED LEDGER - You feel that thing in the back of your head? That little voice, that quiet scream? You already felt this was a bad idea, but especially right now it's even worse. Try as you might, you can't read it now.
VOLITION - You've got *business* to deal with first. Talk to the Union boss first, at least... I can't stop you for long, but there's just enough of an excuse now.
- Volition fighting for his life to stop you from reading the letter :,(
VOLITION - If it's possible, then by pure willpower alone. You are going to have to become... a psycholocomotor.
- that is *not* a real word but we love you anyway vol
LOGIC - Is that how it is now? We should just try all good things *twice* and then give up? By that logic...
VOLITION - Not you too...
- he's all alone out here :(
VOLITION - Someone's been a very busy boy. Good on you...
- thank you...?
VOLITION - *Very* off. Just let her go. Listen to me for once...
- for once?? :((( but if you try...
VOLITION - I can't help you. I am totally useless. Everything I've said is lies. I want the exact same bad things you want. To stand here, like a pillar of salt, saying...
- this is probably one of the saddest lines. all the skills falling apart in the dream is awful, but volition might be the worst. it's also very important that volition *does* want the exact same thing you want. He wants to drink and smoke and think of dora and die. And he chooses to resist it anyways. To be the only thing standing in your way. But it's to the point where it's all he knows. He knows that he has to resist the things he wants, and will occasionally take it too far. Keeping Harry (and himself) from things that will make them happy. In the setting of the game, Volition keeps things together and on track. But once Harry is back in his normal life, it will become very much a double edged sword I think. Luckily(?) it will self balance a bit, where if Volition prevents Harry from being happy then he'll lose morale, weakening volition, and then vol won't prevent harry as much and it'll balance out. hopefully.
VOLITION - Despair creeps into you, getting fat on your weakness. Whatever noble intentions you once had as a police officer -- it's eating them all up now.
VOLITION - Nothing you can say would make you feel any better now...
- 😭 I hate this, I hate the volition death. the endurance one is really painful too, but this one's painful in a different way. Volition isn't getting back up from this. the awful newspaper clipping saying you go to live under a bridge... that's what happens when you let volition die?? if any of the other skills (except endurance) drop to 0 you can just raise them back up, but vollll.... ugh.
VOLITION - Listen... It's okay to take a few minutes to yourself. Sit down and have a breather.
ENDURANCE - You need to rest. Your body is aching. Getting in here has taken something out of you. Have a seat.
- our two health pool boys encouraging you to take care of yourself <3
YOU - "Kim, can *you* see it?!"
KIM KITSURAGI - "I can see it."
VOLITION - Four simple words -- thank god. If he can see, then you're not insane.
- this one is obviously very important.
YOU - "I've finally gone insane..." (Put your head in your hands.)
[...]
VOLITION - My god... maybe you *are*.
- if Kim and Cuno aren't there, and your Volition is really low, you get this very sad fail. :(
VOLITION - True, you ought not love ruins and hell -- and the fading scent of apricots.
- I like this one.
WASHERWOMAN - "I *can* wash it for you," she says after looking the jacket over, "but it's going to take about a half an hour. Think you can stay put for that long?"
VOLITION - Hell yeah!
PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - No, we must run around ceaselessly. It would be torture to stay put.
- I really really love him.
YOU - "By the way, I'm going to sing karaoke here."
GARTE, THE CAFETERIA MANAGER - "Absolutely out of the question."
VOLITION - You wait and see, cafeteria manager!
- volition will not be told no!!
VOLITION - No one can STOP you from finding the phasmid.
PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU?!?! Are you going to CRY now, son?
VOLITION - You heard the coach! This is weakness. It cannot go on much longer, or you will LOSE.
- these guys are great. coach!
YOU - Right. Activate Denial Mode.
VOLITION - You're not really an automaton, you do know that?
- oh, thank you for the insight volition
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- even your most willful, imaginative skills know this scope creep was insurmountable...
DRAMA - But we *are* awake, sire! She has been forthcoming -- with sordid details women usually conceal! Most *shocking* details of the sexual kind! We are a bulwark, un-breached...
VOLITION - You've been breached, bulwark. You've been breached, like, a thousand times now!
- nooo poor drama (volition is right)
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- Volition trying to reassure you after the Tribunal is very important.
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- SO TRUE.
DRAMA - This may have been a *grave* mistake, sire.
VOLITION - Maybe. Maybe not. Mercy is rarely a *complete* mistake.
- I really adore this quote.
I think I'm going to leave it here. I haven't included some quotes that I put in other posts already but I might add them in later to have a comprehensive Volition post... But I've spent like 4 hours on this already so I'm giving it a rest for now :)
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ot3 · 2 months ago
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A while back there was a post going around about how you shouldn’t rate or leave negative comments in your bookmark tags on ao3 because the author could see it. But it kinda shows a weird discrepancy where the diehard fanfic folk want fanfic to be seen as a legitimate art form but also can’t handle criticism of it because “it’s for fun.” Anyway there’s fanfic I like but don’t think is particularly well done and I don’t think I can ever comment that without getting eaten alive on ao3
To add onto my last ask about criticism on fanfic. I think ultimately any piece of art you put out to the world is going to be criticized no matter what. And as any artist or writer you should probably prepare for that
i definitely agree that anything public is subject to criticism but i dont think that necessarily means it's a free for all. my stance in the case of hobbyist works is that you're allowed to be as critical as you like in your own spaces but if you're somehere where the creator is almost guarantee to see it, that's just kind of a dick move more than anything else. i dont think fanfiction is beyond criticism at all and am in fact constantly bitching about how i also think its almost all bad. but i also don't think its really productive or cathartic in any way to say this to peoples 'faces' so to speak.
i'm not super familiar with the ao3 bookmark system so i don't really know what the etiquette there but maybe its kind of analogous to tumblr tags, in the effect that it's supposed to be Your commentary and Your organization system but also op also has immediate access to it. i definitely don't think you should go around tagging people's art just to rag on it, so i dont think i'm super in favor for doing that in bookmarks either.
its lke if you were someone who doesnt exercise a lot and you got into jogging would you want some sort of Running Expert filming a tiktok directly next to you about how your form could be improved? i don't really think it would matter how constructive or well intentioned they were it would still probably kinda feel like shit. but then on the flipside i think they have a right to go home and post to their #RunningTok or whatever the fuck about how they hate these annoying mistakes beginners always make.
i agree that 'any artist or writer' should be prepared to deal with a level of negative feedback for their work. and the people who turn around and write a post about how fanfiction is important and transformative queer art one moment then follow it up with a post about how if you ever have anything bad to say it you're just being a nasty little hater and need to shut up are ridiculous. The 'let people enjoy things' crowd are easily one of the worst demographics on this website. But i think the level of negative feedback an artist or writer should be prepared to deal with is vastly different in the case of people who are Creating as their profession vs people who are doing it as hobbyists.
the amount of people who think they fanfiction theyre producing is Groundbreaking Literature and deserves to be lauded as such while also demanding no critique are a small but vocal minority. one that pretty much 1:1 overlaps with people who view Fandom as an identity rather than an activity. the rest are like... teens just starting to dabble with narrative writing or people with day jobs who think its fun to do every now and then.
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