#i dont even care if their completed I just Want It

[shikaizer]

DIRTY PLEASURE 003.

ᯓ Paige Bueckers x Reader x Caitlin Clark

KINDLY CHECK THIS OUT FOR THE PARTS, SUMMARY AND WARNING > SERIES MASTERLIST

waking up the to the sensation of the light behind your eyelid, the sound of the ac the only source of sound and the warmth to each of your side, slowly fluttering your eyelids, stretching as you felt a lip brush on your neck. you completely opened your eyes to see paige sleeping peacefully infront of you, meanwhile caitlin was behind you.

the affection you are feeling right now somehow feels right and wrong, supposing the rumors you have heard about this two, you cant help but ignore them as the comfort your being given is something you would be longing right now, the feeling of their touch and the way they would treat you well.

but following the event that happend last night, especially when you remembered it right at this moment you slowly sat up careful not to wake them up but failed as caitlin groaned, and paige slowly opening her eyes. the sudden shift of coldness might have waked them up so you cursed your self.

"awake already?" paige asked still obviously drowsy meanwhile caitlin rubbed her eyes pulling you by the waist to lay back down.

"sorry for waking you up." you apologized and caitlin hummed "no worries pretty girl.." paige cooed and you mentally slapped yourself, you have gathered the thoughts of being played by them all over again, at this point you should be standing up and walking out the door and never have contact with them again.

but what can we say? you know yourself well and you know that your liking the attention your being given, its a win for you since they both are perfect. and if the time comes when they would be leaving you, then you cry right? but thats not important right. because you know what they say 'embrace the moment before it turns into a disaster'.

being deep in thought you havent noticed caitlins hands sliding underneath your shirt, technically her shirt, your breath hitched squeezing your eyes shut, paige had taken a notice at this and she pressed her lips on your neck.

"so early in the morning and being dirty..." she scoffed you elicit a whimper from the sudden call out, and caitlin responded by gently pinching your skin making you whince.

"right? what a whore.." she clicked her tounge mocking a dissapointed tone, and you cant even bring your self to speak up, the lingering touch of their fingers lurking on your skin has you dazed and confused.

"i need...to go home." the situation becoming more and more overwhelming has you catching your breath and stumbling words over words, the control they are taking from you is insane.

"why baby? dont wanna stay any longer?" paige whispered to your ears causing a shiver down your spine, shaking your head. "thats not it.." caitlin scoffed smacking your thighs making you gasp "or dont tell me you dont want this?" caitlin state making you quickly raise both your hands up in defense, paige mocked a shocked gasp and pout.

"is that true baby?" you groaned, feeling the weight of the dissapointment coming from the both of them made you guilty. "no! i want this!" you exclaimed earning a amused smirk from them.

"yeah?" caitlin hummed and started kissing behind your ear, meanwhile paige is currently enhaling your scent her hands rubbing you thighs

"just scared..." you muttured and caitlin looked at you. "scared of what baby?" paige asked gaining her attention. "well i... never had sex before..." you confessed feeling shame wash over your body as if you have just revealed the most embarassing thing.

caitlin and paige looked at each other for a brief moment, you dont know if they are either amused or dumbfounded, but their response left you sighing in relief. "so its your first time?" paige asked moving a strand of hair behind your ear, you nodded biting your lip. "fuck, all for us? your first time?" caitlin cursed and sat up the excitement wash over the both of them.

"dont be scared my love, we'll be gentle, promise." paige assured you and you looked down hesitating while caitlin waited for your approval. "dont worry babygirl.. we will take care of you." caitlin added obviously feeling unpatient as her fingers was tugging on the hem of your shirt.

"okay.." you breathed out and caitlin didn't waste a second disregarding your shirt. throwing them across the room, you felt the cold air hit your body as your breath shivered, paige made its way between your thighs pushing them apart each other looking up at you.

you whimpered when paige slid your shorts down, the air hitting your bare cunt making you curl your toes. "so fucking beautiful." paige whispered to your cunt and caitlin gripped on your jaw leaning in for a rough and deep kiss, you gasped thru the kiss when you felt paige's tounge lick a strip.

you rolled your eyes back, the kissing getting more rougher and teeths softly grazing each other, caitlin started to play with your teeths squeezing them like its some type of stress ball.

"aww look at you..." caitlin let out a mocking laugh at your screwed face. "didn't even start, yet you look like we fucked you for hours." you groaned feeling annoyed.

"hey paige, should we strap her?" caitlin looked over at paige and paige lifted her self up frowning. "but its her first time?" paige looked over at you trying to gain some kind of approval from you. "she will adjust, trust." paige rolled her eyes and leaned down again this time sucking your cunt making you arch your back suddenly.

caitlin looked over at you and smiled your moans being blisfull for her ears. "fuck, love that." she mutter leaning down to kiss your neck to your jaw, meanwhile paige was eating you like its her last meal, you hips bucking up each time she would suck on them.

"aww fuck!" you cursed jerking your hips closer to her mouth, meanwhile caitlin observed the way your body responses to deal with you later when shes going to fuck you.

paige stopped making you whine and she quickly shut you up. "patience babe." she growled and caitlin reached out for her strap, once she got it she bucked it up to her waist, while paige starts to insert to fingers seemingly trying to widen up your insides, it was easy to slide in due to your wetness. you let out a loud dazed moan your back arching "look so good like this baby..." she cooed curling her fingers making drool run to the corner of your lips.

once caitlin was set, paige shifted her self next to you her arms wrapping on your waist while her lips are brushing near your ears, pecking your cheeks each time "gotta relax baby okay?"paige assured you nodded and looked over at caitlin whos looking at your cunt while she was holding onto her cock. she rubbed the tip on your cunt making you whimper wanting more, she looked at you smirking rubbing it deeper the teasing being obvious. "please caitlin.." you whined out and she raised her eyebrows. "please what?" caitlin asked mocking a confused tone but the smirk on her mouth never fucking left. "gotta be more specific baby." paige states her fingers busy squeezing your boobs "what a dumb slut, cant even beg right." caitlin scoffed elicting a whimper out of you, her words shot straight to your core, and before you know it, she slid inside you not letting you adjust to the length.

luckily, paige was beside you holding your hand, while you gripped hard on it, she gave it soft kisses "good girl...fucking take it." she cooed to your ear.

caitlin leaned down as she slammed harder inside you. "look so fucking perfect with my cock.." she clicked her tounge following a curse under her breath slamming onto you relentlessly while paige was whispering sweet nothings to your ear.

caitlin continued her steady and rough pace completely turned on by the way your voice is gagging and being really loud. she cant help but to fuck you deeper wanting to hear more reactions from you.

"more!" you moaned out loud and her hands reached a handful of your hair grabbing them tightly and she leaned down staring directly at you eyes darkening "shh shut up and let me do the work yeah?" you gazed up at her and nodded.

you felt the bed creaking beneath you and caitlins lips brushing on your neck, feeling her breath hitch, yet paige on the other side was enjoying the sounds your making while her hands are rubbing your clit, you closed your eyes due to the pleasure your feeling.

But what you haven't notice was, caitlin was taking out her phone, hitting the red button and leaning it to your level basically your whole body and face being shown while shes fucking you, you fluttured your eyes. "what..??" you managed to speak out and paige hushed you. "its your first time baby, gotta make them memorable right?" you tried to catch your breath and caitlin wrapped her arms around your shoulder thrusting in deeper making you groan. "is it okay pretty girl?" caitlin whispered its more like an assurance and not and question, before you could answer, she thrusted in deeper continuesly slamming inside you loud mewls coming out your mouth, unable to form a word and mind blank. "fuck yes yes!" you managed to shout "im gonna cum!" you arched your back toes curling, caitlin buried her face on your neck feeling her breath unsteady. with a final thrust you felt your release your whole body relaxing, caitlin felt the wetness near her strap so she slowed down. meanwhile paige was now holding the phone which she have stopped recording.

caitlin kissed your jaw to your neck as you continued catching your breath. "fuckk... so wet.." she muttured as she reached her fingers to swim in your soaking cunt.

"look at how wet she is.." caitlin grunted and paige smacked her in the shoulder "your not gonna let me get my turn?" caitlin scoffed rolling her eyes "shut the fuck up shes tired" paige groaned burying her face on your neck "next time when i fuck you, your gonna be shouting my name, okay?" she whispered to your ear and you nodded still dazed from your climax eyes closed "oh trust me, paige fucks like a turtle." caitlin spat, assuming that she seen how she fucks other girls.

"oh fuck you" paige groaned earning a smirk from you. "dont listen to her baby or else i'll show you how i really fuck." caitlin removed her strap and layed next to you kissing your cheeks.

"did you feel good?" caitlin asked looked over at you, you opened your eyes to meet her gaze and you smiled nodding. "good."

timeskip 3 weeks later, the three of you are always close, its either the both of them inviting you to their dorm, spending time with you, all the attention is given towards you, they would spend money on you, giving you gifts, making sure you eaten, and you watching them practice everytime while you do some few homeworks in the bench.

and aliyah has taken a notice on this one, she was furious. she felt betrayed. you still spend your time with her whenever your in class anyway but you cant help it when paige and caitlin are always clinging to you.

"hey...are you ignoring me?" you leaned closer to aliyah while she was writing down in her notes, she gave you a side glare and continued writing.

"woah, whats wrong with you?" you scoffed frowning, you are annoyed at this point now and she gave you a disbelief chuckle "whats wrong with me?" she repeated shaking her head.

"you know what your a such a selfish cunt!" she shouted earning a stare from the others, the cafeteria got quiet for a second and later being filled with noise again.

"what did you say?" you raised your eyebrows huffing your chest. "oh stop being all innocent! your really hanging out with those two? gosh even after the issues they done?" you rolled your eyes jaw clenching, truth be told, you didn't believe the issue aside from the screenshots, you have convinced your self that it was just someone making it up, because the fact that the two of those person are literally perfect and popular, theres no doubt that they wont have any haters, you bet its made up by a boy too, yuck.

"they are just friends, its not like im fucking them!" you are quick to swallow your words but gained composure and aliyah laughed. "oh trust me, i bet they did already." you scowled shaking your head you dont understand her her tone doesn't seem concern but jealous ,sudddenly you saw paige in the corner of your eye walking towards the both of you, aliyah's jaw dropped and frowned looking more annoyed as paige sat down next to you. "hey guys. whats with this tension?" paige looked over at aliyah and back to you "bitch." aliyah muttured gathering her things and walking out. "whats up with her?" paige raised her eyebrows and you scoffed. "i dont know... she just crashed out and called me a selfish cunt. just because i was hanging out with the two of you." this was the problem, you didn't keep your mouth shut, but you payed no mind because in your mind, paige and caitlin are always there for you, but they took this literally.

"what?" paige responded unsure of what you just said. you sighed putting your hands up. "i know right. its messed up." you looked up at paige her eyes never leaving your her eyebrows furrowed. "i'll talk to her later." you muttured and looked away and paige was quick to hold your chin making you look at her shaking her head.

"no dont, you didn't do anything wrong, thats just bullshit." paige was right, you dont owe a single thing to aliyah anyway, shes acting like she owns your life or what.

"ignore it okay? it will be fine." you gave her a soft smile and nodded. "okay."

"what are you doing after this?" paige asked and you looked up the ceiling trying to relist some things "well...probably just going to sleep in, im really tired." paige nodded and you collected your things "bye paige." she smiled as you made your way to your next class.

[morganalefae]

it actually means so much to me that tai and shauna seem to hold the most anger towards coach ben. they're the most willing to believe that he burned the cabin down not because they truly think he did it, but because of the way he abandoned them and looked down on them.

tai and shauna were the only ones who took shauna's pregnancy seriously- or at least understood the reality of it. partially because tai was the first to know, she helped shauna with the attempted abortion, she was the first that shauna confided in. they treat the pregnancy with much more gravity than the other characters, because they know how fucking dangerous and terrifying it is for shauna, to give birth in the wilderness with no medical care, no doctors, a rapidly dwindling food supply.

tai and shauna (and nat) are also the ones who struggle the most after eating jackie. tai because her other self took over in that moment, so on some level she has no idea what she's done until afterwards. shauna because they ate jackie, her best friend, the person she loved, hated, and whose death she caused.

for coach ben to look down on them, treat them like uncontrollable monsters who would turn on him and eat him next, to talk as if he's better than them for abstaining... yeah. i can see why tai and shauna would be angry. does he think they wanted this? to be driven to this? does he think they liked it? and the fact that, on some level, they did like it, they dont feel as bad as they probably should.... coach ben, like jackie, is the voice of judgement that they absolutely dont need. what right does he have to judge them?

because, coming back to shauna's pregnancy, coach ben may have had no clue what to do for her, or been able to help in any way, but he was the only adult figure that they had. to him, they didnt listen to him anymore, they didnt see him as an authority figure or value his opinion, but the yellowjackets still care about him, looking to him for guidance and reassurance. theyre still just kids. scared, terrified, unsure kids, one of whom is about to go through an incredibly traumatic birth, so they look to coach for something, anything... and he walks away. to the only room with a real bed, which (in my opinion) he could have offered to shauna during her last few months of pregnancy. instead, ben separates himself from the yellowjackets almost completely. shauna gives birth with her only help being teenagers who have no idea what theyre doing, but at least theyre doing something.

its easy for tai and shauna to hate coach ben. to blame him for the fire. him disappearing right when javi dies and they eat him is obviously no coincidence. and his obvious disgust, his morally superior attitude, the fact that he didnt care enough to even try and help shauna when she was in labour, and now javi's death? why wouldn't he try and kill them? why wouldnt he try and take them all out in one go? they're monsters. thats what he thinks anyway.

i dont believe coach ben set the fire anymore. i dont believe tai did either, but thats an entirely different post. his speech in 3e04 was moving, but it was tai and shauna who really made me feel their anger, their betrayal. he didnt just fail them, he judged them, he abandoned them and then he tried to kill them.

[ki2rins]

⟢ SUGARBOT - pjs

eleven - phone call

warnings: petnames (good girl) , mention of being cheated on, just yn spilling her guts out about her insecurities in the written part.

written wc: 1523 words

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the phone buzzed quietly on the nightstand, loud enough to disrupt your slumber. groggily, you reached for your phone and answered the call. “hello?” you mumbled, still trying to shake off the remnants of sleep.

“hello pretty, enjoyed your sleep?” an unfamiliar voice flowed to your ears, like a tune you had never heard before.

wait this cant be happening…

you sat upright immediately, your heart suddenly racing. your eyes scanned the caller id, and there his name showed “jjongie ෆ”. you thought your mind was playing tricks on you, but no, there it was, the name, the phone call you hadnt expected to see on your screen.

at that moment, the unfamiliar voice spoke up again, breaking the silence. “you awake yet, sweet girl?” his voice had you in a chokehold, your throat tensed up and nothing came out of your mouth when you tried voicing something out.

“um hi…im awake.” you muttered out softly after clearing your throat, dry from both your words and from your sleepiness. your voice felt fragile while your heart beat faster than usual, anticipating what he’ll say next.

the guy on the other side of the line was panicking, jay’s usual calm and composed demeanour faded away. he was like a middle schooler calling his crush for the first time. each word that came out of his mouth spilled out with much consideration, not wanting to scare the poor girl that just woke up.

“so…um i just wanted to wake you up and um…make sure you were well rested before doing your assignments again.” jay quickly said, stammering out of pure nervousness. he tried treating it like one of his daily business calls, but how so when your presence is on the other line?

there was a pause as he hesitated, not hearing a response from you. “im sorry. im pretty sure you werent expecting me to really call you.”

“no jjongie, its okay. its nice hearing from you, makes me more certain that i havent been talking to some random stranger.”

hearing those words made jay’s heart skip a beat. maybe not just a beat. he was hundred percent sure it skipped a couple of beats. you called him jjongie - the nickname you chose to call him by. the specially curated nickname that touched the depths of his heart.

a warm smile spread across jay’s face, the tension in his voice easing just slightly. “thank you, sweet thing. you dont know how much that means to me.” he murmured, his voice softer now. “just didnt want you to overwork yourself. must be odd hearing this from a workaholic huh?”

you chuckled hearing him bring up the joke you made earlier. “come on! you arent letting it go huh!”

you flopped back onto your bed, your mind racing, not from confusion or awkwardness anymore, but from the undeniable connection that had been building between you both. you were sure this wasnt just infatuation, you were straight up falling for him. but there was still that underlying sense of disbelief - how could someone just be so nice towards you?

you had your fair share of relationships - puppy love, situationships, talking stages, exes, been there, done that. you ended your last relationship with a classmate named jiwoo six months ago, who unexpectedly cheated on you. at first, he treated you like he was head over heels for you, downbad even, comparable to how jay is currently treating you, which makes you so wary of him, and any hidden intentions he had.

but something about jay just feels different. his genuine care for your well-being felt completely unforced, like something you hadnt felt before, not even from your three close friends.

“are you still there?” jay’s voice broke through your thoughts, warm and a little concerned.

“yea, sorry…just thinking of something.” you replied softly, your voice trailing off as the weight of your thoughts settled in.

“well, care to share whats on your mind then? maybe you’ll feel better after you let it out.” jay said, his tone gentle yet persistent, almost like he genuinely wanted to know what was bothering you.

you hesitated for a moment, unsure of how much you wanted to reveal. but something about how he phrased his words just made him seemed like a safe space to share whatever was weighing on your mind without judgement.

“its just…i dont know. i guess this whole thing just caught me off guard? wasnt really expecting someone or you, to suddenly come into my life and treat me like the greatest gift of all time.” you started, your voice barely above a whisper. “i cant lie, i have been treated like this before and after that i just get crushed into gravel, like i was nothing to them. so i guess…im just scared that this ‘whole being nice to me’ thing is just too good to be true. i dont know what you want from me, jjongie. and thats the part i cant figure out, and it scares me.”

there was a pause on the other end of the line, and for a second, you wondered if you had said too much, overshared or even scared him off with the sudden confession of your insecurities. but then jay spoke, his voice steady and reassuring.

“dont be scared, pretty.” that simple sentence from jay could easily sweep you off from your feet, but the fear still stays. but what he says next really stemmed the feelings you have for him.

“heres the thing and i want you to hear this clearly okay? i dont want anything from you, little girl. if i demand something from you, the only thing i want and the only thing that could satisfy me is your happiness. im not here to use you or throw you aside. im not perfect and im not pretending to be, but what i can promise is that im here for you no matter what. for the real you. i want to see you, all of you. no games, no fake feelings and no hidden agendas.”

his honesty hit you like a truck, and you couldnt help but feel a weight lifted off your shoulders.

“i know its hard to trust me since we just started talking to each other, but im determined to win your trust. i want you for you and i’ll show you that i mean it. im not going anywhere sweet thing. when youre ready, i’ll be here for you, no matter what.”

you took in a shaky breath, feeling the knot in your chest slowly begin to loosen. for the first time in a long while, you felt like maybe, just maybe, you could let your guard down. not all the way, but maybe enough to enjoy this adoration from someone without guilt.

“thank you, jay.” you whispered, the words almost feeling too small for what you were really feeling. “i…i want to believe that. i want-” you paused, unsure if you should really share your true feelings. but a surge of confidence flowed through your body as if it brought the words out of your mouth.

“i want to believe in you.”

there was a soft exhale on the other end of the line, and then jay’s voice, even more gentle now, filled the space between you two.

“you dont have to rush it, sweet thing. like what i always say, you can take all the time you need. im not going anywhere.” his words were soft, softer than the hundred percent cotton pillow you were currently laying on. you closed your eyes for a moment, trying to steady your breath, the calmness in his voice almost making it easier to relax, tempting to make you fall back to dreamland if you could.

“im scared” you admitted, your voice barely audible. “but…i think im starting to trust you.”

upon hearing your words, jay felt his heart warmed up instantly. hearing how you could open up and slowly trust him just made him felt so at ease.

“im honored, pretty, i really am.” jay poured all his sincerity into those six words. “we’ll figure it out together, at your pace.”

your heart fluttered in your chest at his words, and for the first time in awhile, you allowed yourself to believe in the possibility of something pure. for once, you felt that you could let things unfold in their own time.

“thank you.” you whispered again, the words feeling more meaningful this time. “thank you for being patient with me.”

“always, pretty. any place, anytime, just for you.”

the night went on, filled with chatter, laughter and just pure bliss from the both of you. the connection between you two felt more genuine as each word and sentence flowed effortlessly, no longer guarded but completely honest. the uncertainty that once lingered in the air had slowly dissipated, replaced by a warmth that you hadnt expected but welcomed nonetheless.

maybe it was too soon to say, too soon to fully trust as well, but in that moment, you didnt care about anything but just him, and he too, didnt care about anything but just you.

————————————————— rin's yap: my gosh i didnt expect myself to pour my heart and soul into this written part...but really hope yall could see the pure adoration jay and yn has for each other <3

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© ki2rins 2025, please do not copy or plagiarise my work.

[hairscare]

some of the people in the notes are being really ignorant and shitty so im bringing this back because its important now more than ever. if you want to be alternative stop buying mass produced bullshit. i dont care if it looks cool its not punk its not goth its not alt. what is alternative is doing whatever you can to combat capitalism and waste. wear your old clothes. thrift. diy. but for the love of god please stop going "oh but-" because i cannot impress upon you how much i dont care about you trying to justify what youre doing. alternative movements are about going against the mainstream, and that includes not supporting corporations. the look isnt whats important, its the mindset, but if you do want the look, get it through ethical means, dont buy hollow soulless "alt" fashion.

as for the people who are complaining about slc punk being hypocritical because its a hollywood movie... i genuinely dont even know what to say to that. yes, it is a hollywood movie, and yes, it was made on a budget. that doesnt mean that the film itself has no worth. drawing on my own experience with the movie, i originally only watched it because it had matthew lillard in it. id seen edits of it on tiktok and it looked fun, so i watched it on tubi (where it is still free as far as i know, it kind of goes on and off the platform but it always comes back). watching that movie completely changed my life because its message about performative rebellion vs actual rebellion within the alternative community was something i hadnt spent much time thinking about. the movie completely opened my eyes to that truth, and because of that ive changed myself for the better. slc punk has worth because it can inspire real positive change in the world like it did for me. i also want to point out that a lot of people complain about the ending where (spoilers) stevo stops dressing punk and goes to law school, and i say to those people that they are completely missing the point. just like mike, who realized he could make a larger impact doing ecological conservation rather than getting into fights and smashing cars, stevo is giving up the faux-punk scene to work on changing things in the world. hes using his privilege to become someone who can make things better, and for stevo, thats getting a law degree to fight for change. even if you dont like this ending, please understand the purpose of it: being punk isnt about how you look, its about what you do to change things

me and stevo talk about the commodification of alternative crowds

[lxnarphase]

diabolical munch sukuna who honestly prefers eating u out to like. literally anything else. he could be completely fulfilled if that was the only sex act u wanted to participate in for the rest of ur lives. u thought he was exaggerating at first but no, he could literally cum untouched from it. (and he wouldn't say it aloud to you but honestly, making you cum on his tongue over and over and over again is so satisfying that sometimes he doesn't even want to cum after)

yes yes yes !!

i haven't even been able to get the thought of sukuna being able to cum untouched just from tasting, hell, just from smelling your cunt because he's just so addicted to your scent and taste.

oh and dont even get me started on the times when he wouldn't let himself breathe. genuinely, several times you thought he was about to suffocate and kill himself because he wouldn't let you sit up off his face or wouldn't lift his head from against your pussy because he would rather die than part from you for even a second

but when you do manage to pull him away, those are the moments you get to see sukuna ryomen absolutely broken, a pitiful whine sounding from the man as he glares at you through hazy eyes.

"if you want me to suffer, just say that," he'd hiss before mushing his tongue against your poor, puffy clit, sucking it into his mouth as he slips two thick fingers inside to coax more of those pretty noises and delicious slick out of you. "don't care if i die eating you out, s' stop trying to save me, you've already broken me with this sticky little mess...jus' let me eat."

[midnight---hollow]

Im probably gonna go into more detail on this in the future but its been tisming in my mind and i cant draw rn cus im waiting for my new drawing tablet so imma just drop this know and maybe sketch some cute designs when i can

So ive been think of after nrc cus i saw abunch of cute fanart of azul and floyd (weirdly not much of jade) and i started thinking of what my interpretation of after nrc would be and here are my thoughts

This includes abunch if my own headcanons but i try to stay close to the actual game and my hcs are based off of ingame quotes and implications

Jade 100% is gonna be the twin to take over the family business. I think jade and floyd would have equal power but floyds not gonna help unless he feels like it leading jade to do most of the work. Im my version of the coral sea the leech family owns the largest territory in the deep sea area so most days would be doing daily care for it and bossing people. I do think he would work extremely close to azul but that will be talked apon in azuls bit

Floyd is floyd. He does what he wants and goes where he wants. He helps jade then he gets bored and annoys azul. He disappears for a week and hes traveled the world in that time span and learned how to do the cha cha slide. He is literally floyd he can do and be whatever he wants though usually thats around azul cus azul is azul

I love mafia aus with octivenelle they are so good so yummy i eat that shit up, but in trying to keep this more ingame logical based and not completely biased (its still heavily biased) i dont think after book 3 azul would make a mafia. There is a quiet but still present shift in how azul handles business before and after book 3. We literally see him tear his own contracts in glomas and while yes he is very stingy and smart and conniving, he is not like how he once was.

This might be silly but its my favorite idea and makes me giggle and kick me feet alot. I like the idea of azul just buying an island and making his own tourism town from the ground up. There is a mostro lounge x his moms restaurant collab there, a classic tourism dock, a club owned by the leech family, and those cool shop towns. I imagine there would be shady back deals (hed build it in the leech family’s territory) but i think the general idea of it is more genuine with a bonus of fish mafia black market if it should so be. Idk i like the idea of him making something that ties humanity (the thing he clings to since its probably still a bitch hard for him to truly be comfortable in his mer form) with his merside (something he loves but was ruined for him because of the bullying). Maybe its cheesy but i really like the idea of it

Like i said the island would be build in the leech territory. I dont think they are gonna split up, i dont think im being delusional because i hold them all close to heart no i think they are all oblivious liars, they can not fool me with the “well drop him so fast” shit if that was the case they would have dropped him when he overblotted or threw his tantrum or during his dream. The twins are not the type of people to give three chances to someone azul is just built different in their eyes and i think they would still stew and plan together cus you know azul cares for them and wants them to stay. You heard the “floyd jade! You came back to me” these are some of the only people to give him a chance and show him affection (even if they 100% made him worse) they are sticking together.

In my other post i mentioned how i think the leech family business would be about giving into your desires based on how the twins both act, i think they would run a casino and or club on the island. Its a way to siphon money in their pockets, pour unfortunate souls who just need a bit more money to azul (who would still do contracts obviously just not as crazily impossible to win against as before) and entertainment for them. I think a successful tourist island would kinda be like a flex on the other territories because not that many have proper human connections. Its a power boost and the start of potential more leech family properties in the future if it takes off well.

Bonus round is my oc veeyuu (im prob changing the name but it makes me laugh which is why i havent yet). They would continue to stay by azuls side. Even with the contract being destroyed back in book three and veeyuus debt to the ashengrottos being paid off, they wouldnt want to leave him. I think they would work on the island with the more brighter peaceful side of things, helping shop owners, bringing in tourists, maybe even making their own crafts and pastries to sell though they would be bad at the money aspect of owning a business. They give azul all of the information he needs from around the island and doesnt mind getting their hands dirty again but i think veeyuu enjoys finally being at peace

These are just my thoughts from today cus it’s become my obsession immediately. I need to rework it and rethink it and make sure its accurate but thats my take and i want to draw them how I think they would look in 10 years to cus it makes me happy and i think jade would go a bit more punk and vee would have a cute hat and floyd would have tattoos and azul would have a more peaceful face. No more tightened eyebrows (he has them when floyd comes back from his trips)

[trainingthots]

This cannot be to me Delicacy Love,

I do not think if you as anything of the sort, and if anyone is the Narcissistic Ass it is me. I love every single one of your flaws, especially your tendency to project your insecurity onto others. I do the same things only much worse. I am not using anything against you, i do not fight against you. Its one if the problems in our relationship, that i never could tell you no and that your self loathing meant my love for you made me the least desirable person in the god damn world to you. This man, so easy to degrade and humiliate, to use and despise their girl, got spun around and lost when i met you and fell in love. All of a sudden out of my element i only wanted to love, care and respect you, but had no idea how to do that because of the toxic awful person i was. When i felt like j was never going to get to love you and have you completely, i frustrated and angry at myself for being so ineffectual at the one thing i wanted did what i always do, fuck it all up and pretend that i only failed because it wasnt worth doing. How wrong i was. How wrong i still am if i make you feel this way. But the facts dont line up. I have not been critical of you, i am dealing with pain and loss, but it is helping me realize my awful mistakes and filling me with regret and the urge to do better and right by you. This is once again orobably not for me but for the man you actually love. I am so tired of gim being the one who breaks your heart. I am not the jealous type, but i am amgry that while i am hurt from finding out about all my pain and losing you, i feel so much empathy for you being jn pain from losing him. I am a total pathetic mess. I am sorry for your loss, and i hope to be there for you while you grieve.

You are not unlovable, and the abandonment thing is something i have always accepted and ignored. You have abandoned me so many times its ludicrous. I am not belittling you. I am trying to understand your growth and change while ignoring my own pain. Once again i am not doing the best job, but i am trying.

Nothing I do or post js against you. If someone is doing that it is not me. There is a lot of stuff done in my name that is not me these days. Close your eyes, open your heart and know i would never intentionally hurt you. It is all love from me. I will not criticize you, i will not shame you, i will not even tell people what is going on with me because it risks people thinking poorly on you, and i will not have it.

Forever Your Cheerleader,

The Marquis De Sad

Unlovable

To you,

I'm a narcissist and you know it's true. I've projected all my insecurities just to protect this fragile ego. Now that you've exposed me, I can admit the truth about my low self-esteem and self-worth. I'm temperamental and throw tantrums like a child. I'm narrow-minded and get defensive in arguments. I hide the truth about my life because I genuinely hate myself and all my flaws. It's who I am. 

Thank you for showing me how little respect you have for me. I now understand your intentions of making me feel the pain and dishonesty I have inflicted onto you. There's no need for defending myself at this point if you feel encouraged to make me feel like the most ruthless immature person that has existed. I'm glad you feel a sense of fulfillment in your quest to making me aware of the hateful person I am. 

It's true that I'm unlovable. Everything I attach myself to doesn't truly belong to me. I chose to abandon both myself and others, so please continue writing about how much you despise me. Use everything against my will to prove to me that I was a mistake in your life. I deserve to be agonized and shamed for trying to love you.

You said it yourself that I look like shit, so please let me continue to deteriorate alone. I am unworthy of love and believe I will continue to be just an option. To tell you the truth, you were the first person I felt comfortable being around without a mask. I could be my most authentic autistic self with you, without fear that you'd abandon me for my weirdness. When I felt unsafe, you were always the first person I’d turn to because I gave you the key to my tender heart. I guess it never meant anything anyways.

The narcissist in me is frustrated that I can't control your desire to use my pictures, trauma, and love against me. If you wish to continue belittling me just to prove how terrible a human I am, you've already done an amazing job. And still, I can never hate you because I already hate my life, and you don't deserve that. I'm sorry for being unlovable. 

Me

February the last, 1966 Anne Sexton, from Complete Poems

[wonder-and-wildflowers]

Physical media is so dear to me

but not always in the cute

"Look at my collection!! Look at how well organized it is!! Look at all I've got and am getting"

kinda way

But sometimes in a very feral, stars-in-eyes, foam-at-mouth

"Look at my collection!! Look at how well organized it is!! Look at all I've got and am getting"

kinda way

[ganondoodle]

truly one of the most annoying things in modern landscape of media is watching your beloved movies get either ugly and always worse 'remakes' or get more and more sequels until it turns into a cruel joke of mediocrity

(i saw a single screenshot of shrek 5 and wish i had never seen it, 1 and 2 are very good movies and very important to me but anything after that is just tasteless desperate attempts to keep it going after gettign the perfect ending...)

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 784: The first day's mountain

Pag 1

3: We're passing through the riverside road

4: I see it

6: Kaka

7: Ah!!

8: Teh!

9: It's the first day's

Pag 2

1: “mountain”!!

Pag 3

2: As we “promised”!!

Pag 4

3: It's the “first day's mountain stage”!!

4: A year ago

6: Manami-kun said it after the finish line, on the third and last day of the Inter High, when both of us were all worn out and barely still on our bikes

Pag 5

1: But having our race at the end on the final stage is too much pressure

2: Next year, if we both have the chance to run in the Inter High....

3: …. yeah

4: Let's race for the mountain stage on the first day

Yeah

5: Like Toudou-san and Makishima-san last year

Onoda!!

Manami-san!!

Pag 6

1: Manami!!

Manami-san!!

2: Onoda!!

3: He collapsed!!

Manami!! Take off his helmet

It's okay, I caught him

Onodaa!!

Onoda-san

Do we have a towel?

Danchiku, water!!

4: Next year... the mountain stage on the first day.... yeah

5: Got it....!!

Pag 7

3: When you run along a river....

4: the water only flows if there's a difference in elevation, either uphill or downhill!!

5: Here it's definitely uphill!!

Even if it looks like a flat at first glance, it's gradually climbing!!

Pag 8

1: Toward that mountain!!

Reading the map, it says that it's 5km until the base of the mountain!!

2: 5km!!

3: Don't lose sight of it like last year!!

Yes!! Sorry!!

4: Hold on tight!!

5: 'Cause I'll carry you all the way to the foot of the mountain!!

Pag 9

1: Thank you!!

2: “Positioning”....!!

3: When going from a flat to a climb you need to “position” yourself

Each team accelerates from the flats in order to bring their climbers to a good position

4: It's the so called “mountain's launching pad”!!

5: There will be a difference of several hundred meters in the first stage between a climber who was launched near the front of the group and a climber who was made to run up from the back of the group

Pag 10

1: Bring Onoda to the best possible position, Naruko!!

Oh-

Sohoku is moving up!!

Pag 11

1: -ruaaaagh

Ugh!! Sohoku's Naruko is so fast!!

2: I get what you're tryin to say, Hotshot!!

I'll take him!! Definitely!!

3: That's why I left the first result to Kabu!!

4: On that winter day, with an apologetic face

5: Ah....

6: Ah- uhm, I have something to tell you, but

Onoda-kun, who told us like it was difficult to say....

Pag 12

1: Ah the stove? You can just turn it off, we're the last ones

Yeah, please. Woah, look outside, it's snowing

Seriously? It must be cold

2: That's not it!!

3: Th-th- this morning... I got a text

4: What was that, an acceptance letter?

The proficiency exam?

5: It's a reply to the text I sent....

6: Three months ago!!

7: Uhm... really, I was worried that back when we made that promise it was right after the race and we were tired, so I thought maybe he had forgotten

Three months?

It was a long wait

So I sent him a text to ask him if he remembers?

Pag 13

1: And I received it this morning

Must be the proficiency test

Shut up!!

What are you whispering idiot

“Back when”, when was it?

No idea

2:He said only one word, “of course”

4: So, uhm... this time

5: Is it okay if I run for the first day's mountain stage during this summer's Inter High?

7: Is that so? Kakaka

Onoda-kun's eyes, like he couldn't contain his excitement...

Pag 14

1: I haven't forgotten it!!

2: I can't forget it!!

3: Onoda!!

Onoda-kun!!

Pag 15

1: 2km left until the foot of the mountain!!

2: Do your beeest....!!

Aren't they climbing at an amazing speed!? Each team is getting in line!!

Yeah, you're right!!

3: Every team is trying to “position” themselves for their climbers!!

“Position”!?

4: Also, look closely

Right now, the cyclist in the second position in the ranks

Pag 16

1: is the one who will race in the mountain stage!!

Pag 18

1: Oi, are you kidding me? Hakogaku is sending Manami?

From the first day!?

Manami is in second place

2: He's the “final boss”....!!

3: My dream of getting the red bib has been destroyed even before reaching the foot of the mountain....!!

4: Oi, look over there, that's not all!!

For Sohoku....

5: Naruko is pulling the “King of the mountain”!!

Wa- we're done for!! Completely!! My mountain prize!!

Pag 19

3: Manami-kun!!

4: Sakamichi-kun!!

Pag 20

1: It's time for our promise!!

We're almost at the foot of the mountain!!

[froschli96]

You know what, fuck it, I have to speak my truth! (this is gonna be a rant, so anyone who actually likes assassin's creed revelations and/or the secret crusade, be warned or maybe don't read this at all)

remember how altaïr talks to king richard at the end of ac1, and richard is like "[humans] come into the world kicking and screaming, violent and unstable. it is what we are. we cannot help ourselves."? and how altaïr answers "no. we are what we choose to be." and how that ACTUALLY has meaning bc he himself was "violent and unstable" at the beginning of the game but he has learned and is now CHOOSING to be a better person who cares about others and humanity at large? remember how his calmness and gentleness was something that he ACQUIRED over the course of the story?

and remember how in revelations they then suddenly had a PRE-AC1 altaïr say about the first of his targets "no man should pass from this world without knowing some kindness." and be all wise and calm and collected during a nice little chat with al mualim, who suddenly acts all fatherly? (like, this is suddenly supposed to be a positive relationship? what??)

also, during the confession the target says to altair: "you put too much faith in the hearts of men, altaïr. [...] humans are weak, base, and petty." and altaïr answers: "no. our creed is evidence to the contrary." KJASJFJDKL???? like, it’s almost insulting how close this exchange is to the one with richard. you know, the one that was actually earned after a whole game of character development. like WTF??? cool congrats now that development means nothing. like, apparently that was just altaïr reverting BACK to being the exemplary assassin who understands and believes in the creed that he was apparently just born as. (i also hate how having a young inexperienced altaïr saying this implies that altaïr's faith in humanity is a sign of naivete instead of a sign of the wisdom he has gained after being confronted with counter arguments for a whole game, and also something that distinguishes the assassins from the templars who use humanity's supposed wickedness to justify controlling them like in AC1, but whatever)

altaïr’s development in AC1 mattered BECAUSE he is not NATURALLY a good person, it actually said something about humanity's capacity for both bad AND good and how humans don't have to be forced to be good through mind control bc they can by their own free will choose to be better when taught how and when allowed the freedom to grow. but no. apparently altaïr has just always been calm, wise and gentle. and he just sort of forgot about that during AC1 bc…. ? bc of adha?? bc of abbas???

oh don’t get me started on the whole abbas thing. (it doesnt even make sense that abbas is so hung up about his father and "his family’s honor", like what about the whole point of al mualim not allowing parents to be close to their children bc it would make them weak? like, my dude, you’re not supposed to HAVE any family aside from the brotherhood)

they used the throwaway character that had like 5 lines and made him into altaïr’s main antagonist in revelations… like, abbas wasn’t supposed to be this ONE dude who had personal beef with altaïr, he was just supposed to show how while altaïr’s revered by many, a lot of his brothers also hate him, bc 1) altaïr is a shitty person at this point and 2) bc there’s no real feeling of community and family in this version of the brotherhood, but just a pervasive sense of competition and jealousy — these assassins don’t care about their goal of safeguarding humanity bc they’re too hung up on petty squabbles and divided by rivalries (you know, the things that made malik hate altaïr even before solomon’s temple and that he overcomes in the end which enables him to forgive and to reconcile with altaïr so they can work together and stop al mualim? (you ever just think about "we are one. as we share the glory of our victories, so too should we share the pain of our defeat. in this way we grow closer. we grow stronger." and cry? bc i do. all the time. malik, the man that you are))

and now abbas is altaïr’s childhood best friend turned lifelong enemy?? like, bowden bent over backwards to come up with an explanation for why altaïr is an arrogant ass at the beginning of AC1, when the explanation is right there: he was raised to kill without asking questions and was constantly praised for how good he is at murder, which resulted in him becoming arrogant and disregarding human life. like, it doesn’t have to be some shakespearean family feud type shit. and guess what, this "simple" explanation actually plays into the story’s themes, who’da thunk!

(like, abbas might not have been a "fleshed out" character in AC1, but he had a specific function and now that function is gone. mr bowden, mr mcdevitt, you know characters are allowed to simply exist to tell us something about their worlds and the systems they live in and sometimes that’s more important and also more interesting than having every single character have a detailed backstory to explain all their behaviors, right?)

with all of this revelations loses all nuance in regards to the levantine brotherhood and also the creed in general. like, altaïr being a master assassin at the beginning despite being a terrible person and not actually understanding the creed is a criticism of the brotherhood and the creed itself. like, it said something about the order that someone like altaïr was able to get that high in rank, simply bc he's good at killing, which also tells us what is considered important in the al mualim era assassin order. when you make altaïr’s arrogance the result of his personal conflicts instead of how we was raised by a brotherhood that only valued one's ability to kill, you lose that characterization of the assassin order itself!

and by suddenly making al mualim a semi good "father figure" you also downplay his manipulation of not only altaïr but all those under his care. (altaïr says something about al mualim being "as a father" to him exactly twice in the codex, but he doesn’t mean by that that he WAS a father to him, what he means is that he was the CLOSEST THING he had bc HE DID NOT HAVE PARENTS, not because his mother died in childbirth and his father was executed when he was young btw, BUT BECAUSE IT WASN’T ALLOWED, like his parents actually lived but weren’t allowed to be close to him, he says he came to view al mualim’s "weak and dishonest" love as enough and even better BECAUSE HE HAD NOTHING ELSE, BECAUSE AL MUALIM ISOLATED HIS ASSASSINS FROM THEIR FAMILIES. al mualim "loved" him bc he was good at killing people for him! hm, i wonder if this could be trying to say anything about cults and indoctrination and the inherent contradiction in fighting for peace and free will by taking children away from their parents and raising them to become killers?? like, altaïr wasn't ~the special orphan boy~ taken in by al mualim bc his father died a hero's death, it was "the way of the order" to have al mualim be the closest thing to a parental figure for everyone to ensure absolute loyalty! altaïr saying al mualim was like his father is not supposed to make you go "oh, he must have actually been a good guy for altaïr to consider him a father", it should make you go "oh that's kinda fucked up that he considers the dude who made him into a killing machine and who manipulated him a sort of father figure"!)

and then in revelations they suddenly portray that relationship as positive and healthy??? like, it would be one thing to give it some nuance by delving into the psychology behind al mualim’s "love" and maybe showing how al mualim did care about altair in a complicated, fraught sort of way (like, you know, there’s a lot of interesting things you could say about al mualim at several points addressing altaïr as "my child" in AC1 and how that parallels Garnier referring to the people he drugged and abused as his "children", and what that says about how the templars view the people who they say they want to save and in whose best interests they supposedly act (in any case, al mualim doesn’t use that phrase because he has any real parental feelings but rather to patronize and to invalidate any objections, like in a "mother knows best" way))

but they even fucking DARE to parallel that relationship with that of altaïr and darim in revelations, by having the reflection in the puddle of darim hugging altaïr showing altaïr hugging al mualim…. like their relationship wasn’t inherently abusive but just tragically cut short because al mualim was just "corrupted by the apple"… like WHAT???? so it’s not the very real problems like grooming, manipulation and indoctrination and the hierarchical structure of the brotherhood itself (all of which are antithetical to the assassin ideology), it was just the evil apple all along. great. that’s DEFINITELY a lot more interesting.

god im sorry i really dont want to spread negativity but this is driving me INSANE. like, somebody please tell me im not crazy bc i feel like somehow most of the fandom is in agreement that revelations and the secret crusade have better storytelling and characterization than ac1.

SPEAKING OF WHICH, can we talk about how, even IF we completely ignore AC1 and treat revelations altaïr as his own character…. the narrative still doesn’t really work?

basically, the whole point of his story in rev is that "he gave his whole life to the brotherhood", this obsession led to him not using his time with his family which has him ending up dying alone in a dark library and this in turn makes ezio reevaluate his life choices…. except. he doesn’t? neglect? his family? or whatever? like, his devotion to the assassins is sort of painted as this tragic flaw that leads to a lonely death bc it supposedly comes at the cost of his family, but… his wife has joined the assassins, (at least) one of his sons is in the brotherhood and even when he goes to protect the assassins against the mongols, he takes his family with him (except for the son who stays behind bc he has a family of his own and who, ironically, ends up dying bc of that)… like, you can’t describe altaïr as a good husband and father in the database and have his son tell him that "everything that is good in me began with you, father" when they say goodbye, and then want to make us believe that he put his family behind the brotherhood and that that is a character flaw that leads to his tragedy.

because you HAVE to have a character’s tragedy be the result of a character flaw. like. that is how tragedies work. otherwise it just becomes tragedy for the sake of tragedy which is… boring bc it has no purpose. and we know it is SUPPOSED to have purpose bc ezIO FUCKING QUITS BEING AN ASSASSIN AFTER WITNESSING IT!

it’s like they want to have their cake and eat it, too — they didn’t want to actually make altaïr a bad husband/father, but still wanted to make his life a tragedy where he loses his family which is why instead they outsource all responsibility to abbas who now has to be the reason for ALL the deaths.

like, they try to make at least maria’s death kind of sort of the result of altaïr’s rashness or whatever but like… these guys KILLED THEIR SON and TOLD HIM THAT ALTAÏR HAD ORDERED HIS DEATH. like, altaïr losing it in response to that is not rash, it’s fucking logical and justified! if anything the scene made me angry at maria for trying to stop him. like, GIRL, he was YOUR son too??? but god forbid we give female characters actual real emotions, she has to fill the role of "voice of reason who dies for altaïr’s man pain" i fucking guess.

like, it’s this weird mix where his tragedy is simultaneously painted as his own fault but also not really bc abbas is the one responsible for all the shit that happens. it just… it just doesn’t really go together.

the only way to make his story make sense narratively and to give it actual purpose is by looking at it in the context of ezio’s story, bc the things he sees in altaïr’s memories are supposed to be a revelation (ha!) to ezio specifically. and i guess that’s maybe the crux of it all — altaïr’s story in revelations was conceived of first and foremost to support ezio’s story and development. which is probably also why many people maybe don’t notice bc, having skipped ac1 and started with ac2, the majority of people mostly care only about ezio and only really appreciate altaïr’s story in as far as it serves to push ezio forward. (tho i’ve also seen a few people say that ezio is also written kind of weird in rev, but i’ve never really been an ezio girly myself so i can’t speak to the truth of that)

like, altaïr dying alone in the library doesn’t really have to make sense for his character, i guess, bc it’s only really supposed to be a cautionary tale for ezio.

so, i guess, for once, they actually had a MAN dying for another man’s character development, which is pretty woke actually. ubisoft, i take everything back jksdsfjhgdsahfhsdhfghfdsgjhsdgjh

[thesauce8]

i always hate when people say thag the uchihas are more sensitive because theyre predisposed to mental illness as if theyre dramatic or respond disjointedly from their circumstances. im inclined to say theyre some of the only characters who behave believably in accordance with their trauma. like sasuke was literally psychologically tortured when he was 13. do we think thats gonna turn someone into a football loving go getter? they use characters whose trauma barely gets shown as a standard when its not that the uchiha are dramatic but that naruto just doesnt get much focus on the trauma that he should undeniably have.

[niklas-sagara]

Me after 271

[butch-bakugo]

Why are vetted accounts sending people stuff like this.

I mean it's clearly copy-pasted and sent to multiple people but this isn't even a donations ask. Imma guess the reason people aren't responding is because you're accusing them of not doing enough for Palestine and sending it to multiple people who you clearly don't check because I've been posting about and for Palestine since oct 7th when I learned about it.

Also yes he is looking for donations, you can check his account and find it. Why are you sending this guilt trippy stuff to people and accusing them of not caring enough? You don't know me? You send these to multiple people so your clearly not checking the account in question. This dose nothing to help you personally or the Palestinian cause, it just pisses people off and makes them question vetters.

[doctorweebmd]

ok my OTHER reflection:

on the one hand its really frustrating to see the posts about docs and healthcare in general on here be so narrow-minded. bad experiences with certain providers have lead to a huge spread of misinformation and mistrust with the whole system. which can and HAS lead to people avoiding 'evil' doctors for perfectly treatable illnesses and dying from them (the vaccine bullshit, anyone?)

but on the other hand. it is TERRIFYING how some of these docs practice medicine. at times i think 'are you just burned out and don't give a shit or are you straight up just stupid?' and i work in critical care. where quite literally every case is life or death. even in the academic sector where there is supposedly a standard of excellence, some doctors i would not let touch my loved ones with a ten foot pole.

and that sucks. i know this is the no nuance piss on the poor webbed site but 'the medical system and people that work for it are fallible and aspects of it are morally questionable at best/unethical at worst' AND 'the field of medicine exists to help people first and foremost and mistrusting/avoiding it can be detrimental in the long run' can and DO co-exist