#i don't really have an explanation tbh. i guess i just don't feel like pulling for his weapon. he already feels strong enough without it
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man. my lyney just dropped 70k on his skill. i think that's the highest skill pop i've ever had on record
#⇢₊˚⊹ 🩷∥ruby∥yo,ide yo !!#i think it was max stacks but can't be sure#also for some reason i'm way more proud of my song of stillness on main than my first great magic on the alt#maybe it's because i worked so hard to get the stuff to forge it. and i visibly saw results after equipping it on him#while on the alt,even though he has 4pc marechaussee and his sig,his damage is still just passable at best#my alt is just really bad honestly#i'm seeing hope because i got him to drop 44k today while i was farming resistance books for benny boi#but yeah. basically everyone's artifacts REALLY need work#aside from that though#i'm almost ashamed of the first great magic i have equipped on lyney#even though i literally got it from grinding my ass off for freemos,it still feels almost unfair that i have it#it feels almost cheat-y that i have his bis. even though it literally isn't#the fact that a 100% f2p lyney (i.e. my main account) still outdamages a lyney with his bis set and bis weapon is a bit of bitter irony tho#maybe this is me realizing that i'd rather not whale for weapons actually#even if i did have that kind of money#i want to see how far an r5 song of stillness lyney can go#i might still not be above whaling to c6 him tho#which is kind of ironic cuz like. if i'm dropping enough money to get him to c6 then why not get at least one copy of his sig,right?#i don't really have an explanation tbh. i guess i just don't feel like pulling for his weapon. he already feels strong enough without it#i would still whale for a weapon for chongyun though#i think the difference is that he's a 4 star. and he needs all the help he can possibly get in the damage department#i want my chongyun to drop casual 100k's too ;-;#and then i could give dehya the wgs that he currently has to boost lyney's damage even further#anyway i got enough books to crown both bennett and kazuha on the alt#now all i need are treasure hoarder drops and mora
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Take a Bite Ch. 2
✧ PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader
✧ SUMMARY: Your fledgling career as a music journalist is finally going in some kind of direction that must be on the path to success. Your coworkers like you enough to invite you out on Fridays, your boss is starting to think you’re competent enough to let you score a few bylines, and you're finally getting the hang of InDesign. All of your hard work, late nights, and complete lack of a social life are starting to pay off... Even if it all came at the expense of the longest relationship of your life. Fine. You've accepted the fact that romance isn't for you, under any circumstances. You won't risk your career for anybody. Not even Min Yoongi.
✧ TAGS: slow burn, eventual smut, eventual romance, producer yoongi, music journalist reader, neighbors to friends to lovers? you'll see, reader is bad at feelings, reader is post-break up
✧ WARNINGS: more social drinking in this chapter, horny thoughts from y/n, seokjin is a warning of his own tbh
✧ WORDCOUNT: 3.2k
✧ STATUS: complete
✧ AUTHOR'S NOTE: yoongi being sweet, y/n being terrified, and jin cameo to celebrate his return <3 btw if you're noticing a theme with the chapter titles, let me know teehee. taglist is up, so feel free to join if you want to be tagged in future chapters! clover beat you all to it
Chapter 2: Tell Me What You Want From Me
Unsurprisingly, it’s less than twenty-four hours later when you run into him again. It tracks, now that it’s clear that the universe is dead set on throwing Yoongi in your path, that you’d see him in person before he’s even gotten the opportunity to text you. If he actually was planning to text you, that is.
It’s a little past four in the afternoon, and you’re both making it home from work. It seems that way, anyway, based on the bag slung over his shoulder and his business casual clothes. No one looks good in business casual, but he does. You hate him, you decide.
He’s also holding a huge bag of tangerines, which is… Well, you guess it’s a talking point. If you’re going to be forced to interact again (although you’re very much considering doing the rude thing and just running inside without saying a word) you might as well make up for the last time you saw each other. Last night. Or, this morning, really. You, drunk and drooling over him. Him, stupidly charming and a very good sport.
You��ve been hungover all day, but it started to wane on your way home from work so you decide to do the neighborly thing and talk to him.
“That’s a lot of tangerines,” you say, and you feel a little smug when Yoongi visibly startles at the sound of your voice. Serves him right after making you practically jump out of your skin last night.
He pulls out one of his headphones and grins, raising the bag triumphantly.
"I have a thing about tangerines,” he explains. If that can even count as an explanation. "You want one?"
You can hear your mother in your ear chastising you for taking food from a virtual stranger, but you reason that just because you take one doesn’t mean you have to eat it, and you walk over to his door with your hand out.
“Sure,” you say, eyeing the bag warily. “Only because I’m not convinced you could eat all of those by yourself.”
He hums, staring at your hand as he pushes his door open, tilting his head toward the inside of the apartment in invitation.
Your eyes widen. You open your mouth to protest, to tell him he could just hand you one, but Yoongi already has his back to you as he walks inside, kicking his shoes off at the door. You linger lamely in the doorway of his apartment.
“Oh—Uh, are you sure?”
"Would I have invited you in if I wasn't sure?" You continue to linger as Yoongi sets the bag down on the kitchen island. He opens a cabinet, procuring a plate. "I don't bite,” he calls, turning on the tap of his sink to wash his hands.
You tentatively step inside, shutting his door behind you and setting your bag by his shoe rack. You follow his lead, toeing your shoes off before joining him in the kitchen. You watch as he starts peeling the fruit across the island, shifting awkwardly.
Yoongi's eyes dart toward you for a moment as he continues to peel.
“You're acting like you're scared of me or something. You know I'm not gonna murder you, right?" he asks with a laugh, now starting to separate the sections of the tangerine.
“I know you’re not going to murder me,” you assure him, visibly relaxing a little so as not to look like such a hopeless, awkward freak.
"Good. Just checking." He holds out a section of the tangerine, offering it to you.
You take it, smiling gratefully, but you let him eat his own piece first. It’s the least you can do, for your poor mother’s sake.
You do a shit job of being subtle as you glance around Yoongi’s apartment while you chew, but it’s not like you’re trying very hard to hide it. It’s a natural curiosity, to be in an apartment with a structural layout identical to your own, but so differently decorated. You feel like it’s not weird to look.
"What?" he asks as he eats his own section of the tangerine, and when you look back at him his eyebrow is raised in question.
“Your apartment is cleaner than I would’ve thought,” you say, laughing a little.
“Did you think it would be gross?” Yoongi asks, amused. “Do I give off a gross vibe?”
You snort, because he absolutely does not. If anyone gives off a gross vibe between the two of you, it’s probably you, the sloppy drunk that almost threw up on him last night because he was so hot and so close and you were so wasted. But you keep that bit to yourself. “Not gross. Just… messy?” you offer, snatching another section of the tangerine from his hand. “Not gross, though.”
“Oh, well that’s good,” he teases, starting to peel another tangerine and dividing it in half, sliding one half to you on the plate. “That you don’t think I’m gross, I mean.”
“No, it’s very neat in here,” you hum appreciatively, taking the plate. “The constant bedhead thing you’ve got going on is very misleading.” You point at his mussed hair. If you were a different person, maybe you’d touch it.
He does it for you, though. You watch as he ruffles his hair, smirking at you. “You don’t like my hair?”
“I didn’t say that,” you say. Something about Yoongi makes this back-and-forth come easily for you, and it feels dangerous. You should leave it alone, but you can’t. “Putting words in my mouth.”
He hums, and you watch his gaze flick down to your lips as you say the word ‘mouth.’ “You… have a little…” You watch as he brings his hand up to his own lips, rubbing his thumb at the corner of his mouth to indicate where you have something, apparently.
You hurriedly bring your own hand up to rub at your mouth. He shakes his head, laughing in a way that’s more of a sharp exhale through his nose, and then he’s rounding the counter.
When he gets to you, he holds your chin, and you hold your breath in return, looking at him with wide eyes as he wipes it away himself.
Something shifts. You can feel the charge in the air as his thumb brushes against your bottom lip, and your heart does that stupid flippy thing again. This is a bad idea, you think. Since when did your life become a cheesy romcom? You don’t have time for this. Based on the sympathy in his eyes last night when you told him that, he doesn’t either. You both just got home from working on a Saturday when you were both drinking last night, for fuck’s sake. But you can’t bring yourself to pull away even as every cell in your body screams at you to run out of his apartment right now, future awkward hallway run-ins be damned.
And then Yoongi’s apartment door is swinging open, and you’re flying away from him like shrapnel as a broad-shouldered man in a fuzzy pink sweater walks in like he owns the damn place, brown paper bags bundled in his arms.
“Yoongichiiiii,” the man sing-songs. “Your Seokjinie-hyung is here to make you dinner, you cretin!”
Yoongi, who hasn’t moved, who didn’t fly away from you like shrapnel at the interruption, finally breaks eye contact with you to look at the man. Seokjinie-hyung, apparently.
“Do you have to barge in here, hyung?” he says, with the type of tiredness that can only come from a person who endures this kind of thing five days out of the week, minimum. Can’t relate , you think. There’s nobody breaking down your door to make you dinner. “Can’t you knock, like a normal person?”
“I didn’t anticipate you’d have company, Yoongi-yah,” Seokjin says, waggling his eyebrows and looking at you. “I’m Seokjin. But you can call me oppa.” He smirks. “Unless, of course, you already call him that.”
Ew, for one. You stare at him, your lips parting in shock, because what the fuck do you say to that? You’re completely dumbfounded by this beautiful, broad, gross man.
“Hyung,” Yoongi says sharply, pinching the bridge of his nose, and you finally find your voice.
“I’m Yoongi’s neighbor,” you say quickly, because this complete stranger does not need to think that you are sleeping with this other complete stranger and calling him oppa, of all things? What planet did you just beam to?
“Okay, Yoongi’s neighbor,” Seokjin says, walking further into the kitchen and setting the grocery bags down on the counter. “That’s a beautiful name. Is it French?”
“Hyung, ” Yoongi repeats, louder this time, smacking the back of Seokjin’s head. “Don’t be an asshole to my guest.”
“Yah, when did you become so disrespectful!” Seokjin says, surpassing Yoongi’s volume, smacking him right back, waving his hands around as he speaks. “Am I not a guest, too? Here I am, selflessly providing you with dinner, because god knows you’re incapable of feeding yourself properly. Don’t think I don’t see the tangerines, Yoongi-yah. Was that dinner?”
Okay, yeah. You are officially a spectator to whatever the fuck this is. You’re convinced that if you try to intervene in any way, you’ll lose an arm, and you can’t seem to get your legs to work to walk out the door, as much as you may like to. You’re frozen to the spot, entranced.
“You’re an unwanted guest,” Yoongi hisses, smacking Seokjin once again. “And I am a grown man, fully capable of feeding myself.”
“Yes, a grown man whose height topped out at five-foot-seven because of his horrific eating habits,” Seokjin retorts, narrowing his eyes at Yoongi as he starts unpacking the grocery bags. “Do you think these broad shoulders were bestowed upon me by god? They weren’t. It was kimchi-jjigae.”
“Yah, you’re only three inches taller than me, hyung. Don’t get cocky just because of a few inches,” Yoongi complains, and you swear you see him lift onto his toes for just a moment.
“Oh, but a few inches can make a world of difference, Yoongi-yah,” Seokjin practically purrs, and at that you find your voice, because really, enough is enough.
“I should go!” you blurt out, and both of their heads snap in your direction comically fast. Seokjin looks amused, but also like he forgot you were there entirely, which you think is fair. Yoongi, however, looks incredibly guilty. You’d think it’s cute, if you could think anything besides ‘get out while you still can’ right now.
Yoongi steps a little closer to you, lowering his voice so it’s only for you. You can feel your change of heart before you even process anything he says.
“I’m sorry…” he says, glancing back at Seokjin for a moment. “…For that.” He sighs. “Look, I get it if you want to bolt right now. Seokjin-hyung has that effect on people.”
You hear Seokjin’s cry of protest behind Yoongi, which Yoongi ignores.
“I just don’t want to intrude,” you say. Polite. To the point. Your last line of defense, which Yoongi is quick to crumble with his soft voice and earnest words.
“You wouldn’t be. Despite being a pain in my ass, hyung is a good cook. And he makes enough food to feed an army even when it’s just the two of us,” he continues. “I… You can stay and eat. I’d like it if you did.”
What the fuck is happening to you right now? You can’t even begin to understand why you can’t seem to say no where Yoongi is involved, despite only meeting him less than twenty-four hours ago.
The only thing that you can tell is that it’s not just because of your attraction to him, as undeniable as it may be. You may be an introverted homebody, but you’re still a woman who gets hit on semi-frequently. If that’s what this was, no matter how pretty Yoongi is, you’re sure you’d still be able to say no. But you’re not saying no.
“…This is all very, very weird,” you say, and Yoongi breathes out a strained ‘ I know, ’ which makes you relax a little. “I’ll stay, if you insist.”
“He insists,” Seokjin says, not even bothering to look up at you as he chops vegetables.
To your surprise, Yoongi doesn’t make any kind of cutting remark in Seokjin’s direction. He just keeps his eyes on you, nods in agreement.
“I insist.”
So you stay.
★ ★ ★
Seokjin is very insistent about not letting you help in the kitchen.
“Unless he’s chopped off a limb to get out of it in the past ten seconds I haven’t been looking at him, Yoongi-yah has two fully-functioning hands and knows his way around a kitchen. So you just sit and look pretty, and let your oppas take care of everything,” he tells you.
You hate the delivery of that, really. But you do as he says, and it’s actually pretty nice.
Plus, you get to see just how fully-functioning those hands of Yoongi’s are. You have a fucking front row seat to the capability of those hands.
It does not help that Seokjin insists on refilling a wine glass for you every time you take a sip, but what does help is focusing on Seokjin’s weird, kind of cute pinky fingers instead of Yoongi’s fucking sinful everything that you want in your mouth more and more as the alcohol warms you.
The bickering between the two even seems to die down as they cook. It’s clear that the two of them have done this together before, and it even makes you wonder if they lived together for a point in time.
You learn a lot about Yoongi, too. That he works too hard, which he himself had alluded to last night, but Seokjin confirmed with a gusto that makes you think it’s probably worse than you assumed. That he’s completely powerless to his dongsaengs, which Yoongi didn’t even try to deny. That there are seven of them altogether, a close-knit friend group that will always be the seven of them barring death, and maybe even then. It’s all very sweet.
You’re in the middle of fantasizing about what it would be like to have six friends who love you so much when Seokjin turns the conversation to you suddenly.
“What do you do, Y/N?”
“I’m a music journalist for Look Here Magazine,” you reply, starting to straighten up with pride just as you did last night when you told Yoongi, but something in Seokjin’s expression makes you freeze.
He looks pleased as fucking punch, and you’re beginning to realize that is probably never a good thing.
“Oh, are you?” he purrs.
“Hyung,” Yoongi says warily, but he looks just as confused as you feel.
“You know, our Yoongi makes music.”
“Yes, he told me,” you say slowly, your eyebrows furrowing.
“He’s very good,” Seokjin continues. “Back in college, he used to write all of these raps about eating pus—“
“YAH! Stop!” Yoongi interjects, and when you look at him he is completely pink. You were already pink from the wine, so you would guess you’re fire engine red right now, if the heat in your cheeks is any indicator.
“You weren’t ashamed of it then, Mr. Tongue Technology,” Seokjin sniffs, doling out rice into three bowls like he didn’t just drop a bomb that you’ll be thinking about for the rest of your life, maybe. Tongue technology.
“I was twenty,” Yoongi complains. “I was young and cocky, and I had an awful group of friends who never told me how fucking stupid I sounded.” He turns to you, although he is barely able to hold eye contact. You’re in the same boat. “Please forget you ever heard that.”
You nod, stiffly. What else can you do? Say you’d like to take that tongue for a spin, right now preferably? No, no, no, no.
“How about we talk about something else?” you offer, quickly. “What do you do, Seokjin?”
That seems like the right thing to say, because even when the three of you finally sit down to eat, Seokjin is still happily going on about his aspirations as an actor.
★ ★ ★
Seokjin rubs his belly happily, slumped against his chair.
“God, I’m good,” he sighs. “Tell me how good I am, Yoongichi.”
“You’re so good, hyung,” Yoongi says flatly.
“Thank you again, for having me,” you say, smiling a little. Despite your apprehension towards Seokjin at first, dinner was surprisingly pleasant and, to his credit, really fucking good. “Both of you.”
“Ah, you should come next time all the kids are around,” Seokjin says, grinning. “It’ll be a hoot.”
Yoongi stays quiet across from you, but he meets your eyes and nods. Flip.
“Well… I’m only two doors down,” you say softly, looking down at your empty bowl.
“Just wait until Jiminie and Jeongguk get ahold of her,” Seokjin says to Yoongi. You don’t know what that could possibly mean, could mean a lot of things coming from Seokjin, but Yoongi rolls his eyes.
“It’s getting late. We should probably clean up,” Yoongi says, starting to stack the bowls. “Do you need a ride home?”
“I’m not an invalid, Yoongi-yah,” Seokjin scoffs. “I can take the bus.” He stands up, snatching the bowls away from Yoongi. “Let hyung clean up and I’ll be on my way.”
Yoongi doesn’t put up a fight, handing off the bowls, and then Seokjin is in the kitchen, leaving the two of you alone for the first time since tangerines and Yoongi’s thumb on your lip.
“Thank you,” you say again, this time just for Yoongi. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a night like this.”
“I wouldn’t have any nights like this if it weren’t for Seokjin-hyung and the rest of my friends,” Yoongi says, brutally honest in the way you’re figuring out he always is. “When you love what you do, it’s hard to remember that there’s anything else.”
You nod, because you know exactly what he means by that.
“I really know what it’s like. I know we just met last night, but if you ever need…” He shakes his head, putting his words together. He looks unbelievably shy, not for the first time tonight. “Ah, I’m not used to being the one to give this speech. Look, we can hang out, is all I’m saying.”
You realize then and there what Yoongi is offering, and something clicks into place. Friendship. Despite the charged moments, the clear attraction, he’s offering to be someone you can go to. Someone who gets it and won’t judge. It doesn’t feel like pity, either, strangely. This is why you can’t bring yourself to say no to him, you realize. He’s offering you something you desperately need.
You smile, despite the fact that you kind of feel like crying.
“Only if you show me those raps Seokjin was talking about.”
✧ shoot me a reply or an ask if you enjoyed this chapter! feedback is always appreciated <3 join my taglist if you want to be tagged in future chapters!
@dollfaceksj
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#take a bite#yoongi x reader#min yoongi x reader#bts x reader#bts fanfiction#bts fic#yoongi fanfiction#yoongi fic#min yoongi fic#minors dni#Spotify
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trust me when I say the majority of fans are disappointed if not that tired af this time. yeah you might see some ppl coddling him on twitter but that is a small minority. and those who are not expressing on twitter are letting it out in gcs. Like the fans who have been forever are tiredddd. And that's saying something since he has no new fans this era and most of them are here since 1d. so yeah happy faith in the future with the same old team louis.
Good. This is going to be a stream of conciousness so bear with me, but recently I've been wondering if Louis or lthq aren't a bit disappointed with the fanbase so they stopped nurturing it so much? I mean, I am pretty certain that they hoped for more with FITF release and the fitf tour, considering what kind of venues they booked and how many dates they put out. And imo, if all this happened in 2020/2021 the fanbase would be more than enough to sold everything out and keep the album on top of the charts for longer. I think that maybe they saw the fanbase growth, saw the numbers the livestream pulled and then just took it for granted and thought it's always going to be like that and that fans are going to stay through everything. Unfortunately tho I feel like lthq and tbh Louis too don't really know this fanbase, its dynamic, how it operates and why people wanted to follow and support Louis in the first place so it's hard for them to work out a strategy. I mean, you won't tell me that someone business savvy would recommend pushing with the Freddie stuff that turned off A FIFTH of his 2020 fanbase off if we go off of his twitter engagement. He says that we need him and he needs us and I don't know if it's true in its entirety anymore... I mean he does need us but do we need him? What content is his putting out there for us to enjoy. When we look at the doc alone it's stunts and struggles of a straight laddy lad devoted dad. I'm nkt sure that people necessarily need this person. At least personally the reason why I fell in love with him as an artist and as a person was cause he seemed such an inspiring, fearless, bold and resillent personality and I could believe in him and his fight. This is who I need. Because what exactly is he now against or what is he fighting for? Do lthq and Louis even know why fans feel such a strong connection to him? Why they want to support him? Cause in my opinion it feels like they have they idea of the fanbase completely wrong and I think they kinda proved it with the doc where they shows passion as camping and stalking completely writing off any other parts of his amazing fanbase. What it shows to me is that they only have a surface level knowledge about Louis' fandom and like with everything, the bare minimum is their comfort zone. And now you have this thing with this cancelation, where he didn't even mention what exactly he cancels and who exactly is affected as if hey let's pretend it was all a dream. And comparing it to him writing a lengthy explanation for when they had to postpone the signings for the fans in the UK.... I guess it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I could go on and on and on about Louis' situation but I think I can bring it all down to 3 main points:
1. As long as Louis and lthq don't figure out, that it wasn't the extra laddy lad Louis who sold out the first tour and who people followed back then, nothing will change.
2. Louis and lthq have to stop wanting to be an indie artist with mainstream numbers.
3. Bare minimum won't fly forever. You base your image on your connection with fans and they always show up for you, but when was the last time you showed up for them, when you went the extra mile for the fan experience? If you want the way you treat your fans to be your main thing, then I'm sorry but you could learn a lot from people like Lewis Capaldi when it comes to nurturing and connecting with the fans.
#ask#anonymous#i know that people will accuse me of hate already but i promise you it's not this#like i don't even have strong feelings about louis anymore#i'm just sad i guess and i feel like sometimes it's healthy to step back#and ask yourself some questions/reevaluate the situation#because we keep saying that he wouldn't do something/he would have acted different and then he just... doesn't#and the overton window just keeps being pushed further and further
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What would happen if PSL!reader fell in love with Idia? Maybe their photographic memory makes them immune to the river (that was mentioned in book 6) so Idia realizes that he could have a future with reader... or be forced to, by his parents. And would Azul take advantage of this?
The chaos.
Oh no... Idia realizes he got to pull an SSR card!? Craaaappp... One question, w h y. He doesn't know how you even fell in love?!
Idia rn:
While you're over here like:
Oh no, he's REALLY hesitating to approach you... you're a cool dude and all... Does he need a player #2 in his world..? Or are you just another character that pops up in one route when he makes a big decision??? He doesn't know...
but then when he realizes you have photographic memory he's like: Oh no. They probably have everything down to my particles memorized... (Idia is just overthinking, don't mind him) About the river, he does realize you're immune to it so... there's no use for that I guess...
But the moment his parents forced him to? DAMN, What kind of cliché princess and prince dynamic is that? You know those arranged marriage crap that is?? (Phantom br-) And... the thought of marriage... HE DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE ROOM INVENTORY!? It's like changing your difficulty to max...
Anywho, whenever he sees you looking for him he's going to RUN. Wait- How did you- HOW DID YOU MEMORIZE HIS SCHEDULE!? WHAT THE FU-
TIME TIME TIME, WHY ARE YOU IN IGNIHYDE DORM!? NOOOOO YOU'RE KNOCKING IN FRONT OF HIS ROOM, ORTHO DON'T ANSWER!
You rn:
Ortho, opening the door:
I mean, SOMEONE likes his big brother now!!! Ortho has to thank you for that lmao And Idia??? Wai- Your hair is red... WAIT HIS HAIR IS RED, NOW YOU SEE HIM AND IT'S GOING TO BE INGRAINED IN YOUR HEAD NOOOOOOOOOO Idia feels like he doesn't have a restart button whenever he's with you tbh... YOU'RE LIKE... THAT ONE BOSS WHERE THEY CAN BREAK THE FOURTH WALL!
Anyways, When Azul and he are at the club, Azul was wondering why you keep asking how was Idia and stuff. He asks why you have some kind of interest in him.
When you went inside the room, Idia's red hair and Ortho accompanying you with a smile was enough explanation.
Azul would just......... ship you two. For the love??? No??? It's for business bro. [pulls in the deranged twins] I will need you to squeeze info out your sister about her feelings towards that flaming smurf Expect Azul to tease Idia about you and tell him what you do that's connected to you.
Azul: You know, the twin's sibling? Yeah, they draw you every day because they have memorized every single molecule in your body.
Idia:
....hoWT HE HELL DID YOU FIND HIS SOCIALS!? NONONONONOONONONONONOOOOOOOOOOO
Well.. at least he's more comfortable talking there... than.. in person...
Wait... DO YOU PLAY THAT GAME AS WELL?! He adds you in said game and YOUR BUILD!? Holy crap bro how long have you been playing all of the stats are out of this world... and you're a bit social as well and not that much of a shut-in??? Props to you... wait why is he blushing
#h3apy's psl!reader 😊🔫💥#Idia#Idia Shroud#idia shroud twst#twst#Twisted wonderland#Azul#Azul Ashengrotto#Azul twst#Azul Ashengrotto twst#h3apy crack writings 😊🔫💥#h3apy writes😊🔫💥#h3apy headcanons 😊🔫💥
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been thinking 💭 about their time spent as worlds most annoying students
lore dump LOOK OUT
- i will make a proper explanation for the worldbuilding i have for empires one day but basically all thats necessary is that its set in a high fantasy world separate from any other smp, i consider most smps being set on the same "planet" i guess? (special thanks to rendog for making me have to clarify that.) but at different times so empires s1 takes place fairly early, a time similar to the renaissance period for us.
- pix and fwhip knew each other before the series though because as said above They went to school together! About ten years before season 1 is set. Specifically a very prestigious academy in the city they both grew up in, it's more like a university than a school, they're both young adults when they enroll.
- fwhip is studying alchemy not just out of the love of it but also to follow in his father's footsteps (his relationship there is. not great but that's another ballpark) while pix is studying astronomy which in this world is a very important and magical study! the people of this region believe the stars and planets can help predict future events and disasters, so talented astronomers are basically like prophets. he doesn't actually have any prophetic visions or anything though.
- pix has a whole thing i'll get into some other time that basically means his ability to harness and use experience/magic is limited. most humans aren't as naturally predisposed as some other species but pix is especially Not good at this. but he's very studious and wants to learn all he can about magic even if he can't use it, so he's a model student
- fwhip on the other hand has natural disposition for magic due to having elvish genes, and is a bit of a slacker tbh, not because he doesn't care but because of bad past experience with educational environments.
- the two of them meet because they have a handful of classes that overlap. Don't really get along at first (quite badly actually though I'm considering changing that LMAO) but they end up becoming friends and eventually falling into dating yayyyy great awesome who clapped.
- fwhip has bigger dreams though. he wants to become Thee royal alchemist and it's sort of in his game plan that pix will become the royal astronomer even though pix... Isn't really that certain about astronomy as a career path at all. He has a family business that he might need to go back to but more importantly for him he just sort of wants to slow down and focus on rn!! Their relationship ends up falling apart for a lot of reasons but this is one of them.
- I say falls apart but it never actually has a defined end lol fwhip just. Leaves one day before he even graduates because he gets offered a very lucrative position that he can't really say no to. He leaves a letter but he never says bye and pix will hold a grudge to this for over a decade.💙
- their time at the academy is probably the happiest years of their relationship (unless i decide to say fuck it and give them a semi happy ending) and almost definitely the happiest years of fwhip's life. they are the most annoying bitchy gay couple u know. they pull so many pranks (pix has always been a lover of those and fwhip only enabled him in taking them to extreme levels) and generally are quite sweet at times even if its not always clear like. how committed fwhip actually is (he loves pix! he's just allergic to commitment and showing feelings without backtracking to make a joke after)
- on their designs there's not much to say, fwhip cuts his hair shorter including his little horn tufts and generally doesn't let it get long enough for the green to show cause he's trying to be more cool and professional. (Later on he actually starts dying it to make sure no green shows which is fake as hell of him but anyway) Pix bears a striking resemblance to recap!pix which doesn't really mean shit other than he is his great x10 peepaw uncle twice removed and ithought it was cute. Fwhip bought those earrings for him which I think I've posted about before somewhere. Their outfits are sort of lame cause I made them up in five seconds just so I could draw something orz I don't think the academy had any strict uniform though pix probably did wear gloves due to working with magic and fwhip definitely never wore suitable gear for working with highly dangerous chemicals
- tldr blows them up in my mind
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Icha I'm so curious why do you think Muku made a bingo with Itaru's questions, penny for your thoughts? I didn't expect that!
hey there <3
I didn't expect that either tbh! but the more i thought about it the more i could see some reasons he might have done that but i have a strong one in mind at least:
The main one, imo, is Itaru's whole deal about how private he is especially to the public eye. Itaru tends to not liking exposing too much about himself and tries to keep up this princely, charming image to the world. We know him well, and we know Itaru is unabashedly himself around us, but everytime it comes to showing himself out to the audience, he puts the mask back on, right? he opens up once in a while for the sake of authenticity (like the pre-show of Kniroun), but the more private he is the better he gets right?
and Muku is someone who's perceptive and accommodating, always trying to do good deeds. He wants to be a prince, and being a prince is about taking people away from situations they would be unwell into. And Muku admires Itaru a lot. He knows Itaru like we know him, and admires also his princely side (no matter how much it makes Itaru cringe ahah).
My bet would be that, Muku would read the question corner and consider that it would perhaps be too personal to share about Itaru. I think he's leaving Itaru a way out, if Itaru doesn't want to answer any of those facts for himself.
(similar reason too why he went with his hobbies being reading manga over playing video games. No way Muku doesn't know Itaru's main hobby. However, while Itaru opened up about playing some games, i do think he doesn't want the whole world to know he's a massive geek. So Muku doesn't quite lie, but he picks something less incriminating, and leave Itaru the choice on whenever to correct it or not).
I think with the persona Itaru gives to the outside world, he wouldn't have been in a position to just goof around like Citron did in order to not address whenever he is lonely or wants to be pampered or loved or anything. So, Muku doing it for him allows him to ignore the question corner if he feels like it.
I don't know what Itaru would do, perhaps Muku (or more likely, myself) overthought it, but i could definitely see it being one of Muku's good deeds of allowing Itaru to chose how much he would show to the world.
Then on other possible explanation (that might add up, i don't think any of them contradict themselves enough to be individual explanations): -Muku didn't really know what to answer / overthought it so much that he lost confidence in the way he was perceiving the situation (i'd think it rather unlikely with where Muku is in his character arc however. Act 1 Muku might have but Act 3 Muku seems more confident to really lose it like that.)
-Muku genuinely wanted to joke around like Misumi and Citron did, both due to the fact Muku is still a Summer kid, and the Summer troupe considers having fun and joking around helps other a lot more, and the fact he admires Citron enough he could take after him and decide to pull the same joke as him
-Itaru has a lot of fans, even in the story itself, he's really popular with the ladies. I could imagine that saying full front whenever he's lonely ("so you could make him less lonely ladies :)") or like to be pampered ("so do come and flirt with him more he loves it :)") could be downright dangerous in Itaru's situation lmao
But yeah personally i just would assume he's giving Itaru a way out. Perhaps even because he overthought about it himself and came to conclusions that could sound embarassing. so, protecting Itaru's intimacy and leaving Itaru the choice on what to address.
True Little Prince Muku yknow? ❤
That's how i read it at least!
I guess we'll perhaps have more clues on it depending on how Itaru reacts tomorrow! if Itaru takes advantage of it to completely ignore the Question section (or doesn't correct the hobby section) i'd say it's highly likely that was the reason. If he addresses the Question section, it doesn't disprove Muku worried for him but it does remove some weight to the theory itself.
But yeah that'd be my read on it, if it helps o7 hope it made sense :3c
#ichareply#ichafantalks a3#emilycollins00#ichablogging a3jpn#also sharing it here bc i saw your tags:#i think Omi made the Kind cut bc Omi feeds Itaru scones at night#there's a few backstages tackling that Omi is watching over ITaru's diet and make sure he is well fed even at night#and Itaru really being touched about Omi's pampering (bc Itaru likes to be pampered LMAO)#so Muku has a point Itaru DOES find Omi particularly kind#i would have also put Sakuya on the list too for Itaru personally#but Omi has every reasons to be there yeah
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I know you’re in Scream mode, but I, Yellowjackets Anon, have new PG theories.
Pit Girl ain’t no girl - it’s Javi!
Pit Girl isn’t real. The plane never crashed and none of the subsequent events happened. It’s all just Shauna’s drug-induced dream in the flight. That’s why Tai’s election makes no sense - it’s a dream based on an apathetic teenager’s understanding of American politics.
Pit Girl is Lottie. Adult Lottie is actually Mari, who stole Lottie’s identity somehow.
Pit Girl is a stunt woman. The girls will learn that they can just use their stunt doubles for sustenance. It will be kind of like Spaceballs.
Pit Girl is one of the JV girls they’re introducing this season. Mari isn’t shown in the adult timeline just because she’s weirdly well-adjusted and living elsewhere.
Thoughts?
Whoo thanks for sharing your theories, anon!
Okay now pit girl being Javi could be interesting but I'm pretty sure we clearly see a female so I'm not sure how it could make sense. I'm not against this theory, I'm just sorta stuck on pit girl being...a girl lmao. I guess it's been a while since I watched that first episode but I feel like we very clearly see a girl running, & not a boy with long hair or anything. IDK....maybe? This one is definitely my favorite of these options.
LMAO, I'm cracking up @ your explanation for Tai's election. TBH I think this universe is just wacko & we gotta role with it & that's the explanation. I'll be honest if they pull any type of "it was all a dream/hallucination / whatever" BS I'll be through. Sorry bestie but I can't stand that trope & also do not think that's where it's going so this one is a no from me aksdjsjf
Wait actually, I lied before. Pit girl Lottie & Mari stealing Lottie's identity might be my fave of these theories. I don't really think that's what will happen but it's an interesting idea!
LOL @ the stuntwoman theory
I think that the theory that it's a girl we don't know yet & Mari is weirdly well-adjusted & living elsewhere is by far the most plausible of these theories. That might actually be what they're planning, although my money personally remains on Mari. I could also see this though!
Thank you for sharing your theories they were fun to read! Sorry I never have any interesting theories for you because I remain convinced that the pit girl is Mari LOL
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I honestly wish for s3 that the episodes were longer than 11 minutes, so we could get some good development.
Anyway. I kinda like how they handled Macaque's START at redemption (whether he continues on it remains to be seen). I don't consider it full redemption because of the crap he pulled (regardless of circumstances), but it's a start. And Wukong apologizing to MK was great, not as emotional as I thought it'd be, but I was content. And, in regards to MK, the kid appears very understanding and forgiving, and I personally think a lot smarter emotionally than people give him credit for. (Also the fact he put Macaque in time out made me laugh so hard)
I will say it does feel like something in Macaque did change, maybe after getting his ass kicked by possessed Wukong, he realized "well shit, if I wanna live guess revenge isn't gonna help me, I'm just gonna die again". I need more backstory into what happened between them because I feel like A LOT would be explained (not excused, obviously) knowing that info. I want to analyze this monkey's psyche.
Also apologies for this being all over the place 😅 I tend to ramble
Hey no worries @ladyzerodark ! I get where you're coming from & definitely agree that the season 3 special would work best as the START to Macaque's redemption arc rather than its totality. Kind of like I agree that Sun Wukong apologizing to Xiaotian works well as a BEGINNING to an arc of the Monkey King working hard to be the best shifu he can be rather than his apology being a one-and-done kind of deal. Like it's more and more clear that Xiaotian is quite forgiving & wants to give people the chance to change for the best rather than freezing them out of his life or always going straight for the ultra-violence (even though he is very clearly willing to use said ultra-violence to end a bad situation if needed), but tbh in that regard I often feel like the most satisfying stories about redemption/improvement are those that give more weight to the choices & behaviors of the person working to become better rather than treating it as an afterthought to acts of forgiveness. Changing your behavior is hard and arduous process--especially if there's trauma underlying it--but it's still possible & can give you and the people you love a level of peace of peace that didn't seem possible. And seeing the road to get there, making choice after choice to be better even when it's really difficult, can make for really powerful tales.
But that's precisely where I feel a lot of "redemption" stories fall completely flat or become downright insulting and damaging. Like so many seem to be set up in such a way where character A is just dishing out one act of forgiveness/second chance after another even though character B refuses each and every one of them, getting worse and worse & hurting more and more people to the point where you're left like "wow! You could have literally saved a lot of lives if you just murked this a-hole instead of giving them YET ANOTHER chance to be slightly less horrible than they currently are!" And I'm not saying that that kind of story is inherently bad; I think you could do a lot of interesting stuff in terms of exploring how love for one person can blind you to their actions, explore what might happen when explanations for bad behavior becomes excuses for said behavior, and explore the positives and detriments of the concepts of forgiveness and redemption as a whole. What we often get, however, is stories where even after a character is in the deep pit of their moral event horizon and has consistently taken every single opportunity they could to hurt/kill/maim for their own goals, suddenly all of a sudden in the 25th hour they'll be like "okay no longer evil now I want to be loved" & we're just supposed to forget everything they've done. Like what.
BUT ANYWAY, coming back from my own rant about this story type & with apologies for my own act of being all over the place, I feel like even though it was kind of jarring to see how quick Xiaotian was to leave a door open for Macaque given everything this shadow basturd has put him & his loved ones through it definitely was a good move in my book that Macaque isn't a part of team Monkie & that he still clearly has a lot of hostility with SWK. They were allies in an extreme situation, but they still have a LOT of stuff to work out before they could be considered friends, if ever. It will be interesting to see where Monkie Kid will go from here in terms of what they might do with SWK and Macaque's development, but yeah fingers crossed that as you said they treat the s3 special more as the BEGINNING to acts of conscious self-improvement rather than the end point for these two monkeys.
That said, I have to have a laff both at your completely possible idea that Macaque's going to lighten up his attempts at bloody revenge because he's starting to like Xiaotian as a person but mainly because he's now fully aware of just how much SWK has been holding back, and as per usual at the way all of their backstory is treated as such a mystery even though you can turn to JTTW right now & read all about the Six-Eared Macaque's attempt to murder-replace the Monkey King asdfewadf. Yes yes I'm sure they'll add a lot more complexity to the situation in Monkie Kid but honestly it's been a source of constant amusement for me to see people going to JTTW to get a sense of other Monkie Kid characters' backgrounds & motivations but when it comes to Mr. Macaca the popular fandom reaction seems to be "suddenly I could not read <3". IDK why this is. Maybe because it makes Macaque seem a lot less forgivable & SWK's disdain a lot more understandable if the shadow monkey's backstory is still the og classic of "beat up the Tang monk & held SWK's monkey family captive & tried to murder-replace the Monkey King & maybe also cannibalized at least one monkey." Maybe it's because shipping him with SWK is made much more creepy given that basically his entire appearance in JTTW was running around in a SWK fursuit and insisting he was the one and only Monkey King lmao. But at least for me it's starting to get kind of baffling to see the extent to which people just WILL NOT even acknowledge that Macaque's role in JTTW was as SWK's evil twin, or all the reasons that SWK would be enraged at Macaque as a result. We'll see I guess, but personally I'm hoping that they keep in the og background because I think it would make for a really interesting and unique struggle between SWK & Macaque if Macaque's story was "my hatred & admiration of you reached the point where I decided to be you except better & I've now spent centuries living with the fallout of my entire identity revolving around someone I've grown to loathe but I have no idea how to live otherwise," while SWK, after rotting in self-imposed exile for 500 years, seems to have made some hesitant steps to live and grow beyond his past by taking on Xiaotian as his tudi only for that to get almost immediately effed up by both his own errors & a whole host of yaoguai turning against Xiaotian for being SWK 2.0, so that now the Monkey King is left in a state of "why the @#$#!* would you want to be me?!" and/or perhaps worst of all for both of them "yeah man go for it you couldn't possibly be worse at being me than I was."
But yeah in conclusion keeping in at least elements of the og classic could make the background of these two monkeys quite the interesting conundrum far beyond ye olde trope of "you were my friend but then you weren't so I made that everyone's problem until they forgave me for my violent bullshite at the last possible second."
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i'm curious, what are your top 10 favorite rinharu moments in high speed and high speed 2?? i love the books. i don't understand why people say is impossible to ship rinharu if you read them...
Lmao who are those “people”? As in multiple? And are they from Mars? I do not get this. You cannot be serious. You probably meant “impossible not to ship”?
I don’t know about top ten, I love all of their interractions tbh, they just remind me of my fav type of romance in general. I know what are my top 5 I think, but after that I love everything, so it’s hard to rate.
1. My absolutely favorite moment will forever be the one, where Rin describes the way he sees Haru in the water, I’m seriously forever in awe, because, I’ve read a lot of books, and like... even period dramas got nothing on Rin Matsuoka, when he describes the love of his life. I mean, seriously, find yourself a person who sees you the way Rin sees Haru lol
Rin felt like he was touched by the light, that surrounded him with warmth. He turned around to see Haruka, who was glowing. Shining. Haruka was shining with every strong and confident stroke that he made. The outstanding energy, emitted from him, surrounded Haruka with the dazzling light and Rin froze, unable to look away. Rin’s heart was beating so hard in his chest, that he forgot how to breathe. Haruka stole his heart. And the further away he got from him, the more distance grew between them, the more uneasy Rin felt, like he was losing the control over his emotions. He was possesed by Haruka’s shining. His strokes looked as if he was hugging the water, his leg movements were so effortless and so elegant, as if water herself was moving him to the finish line. But in all these deceptively smooth and unhurried motions were so much strength and power and such incredible speed, that all his opponents didn’t stand a chance. His swimming was that transcendent reality. He was like a bird dancing in the sky with its wings spread wide.”
Dude... I’m like... still speechless. I mean, and not just this, but everytime Rin talks about Haru, even when he jokes about his stupid habbits, you still feel that he finds him so beautiful, inside and outside, that it just makes my heart melt.
2. When Aki tells Rin that if you put him and Haru together, you get a perfection.
“That guy has no sense of humor. He should learn by watching me, don't you think?" Rin joked lightly.
Aki laughed a bit at his words. "It's true. Add the two of you together and divide by two, and it would be perfect."
But I mainly love that moment, because like... Aki starts telling him, that Haru is not what he's pretending to be (like for some idiots in the fandom who call him selfish, that was the explanation for them xD) and how everyone always want something from him, and he never asks for anything in return and doesn’t have anyone to lean on (yup that’s what I said all along, too, with Makoto’s dumb behavior in difficult situations, he’s on his own there lmao). And she waits for Rin to deny it or like be surprised, but it turned out that that’s exactly how Rin sees him and that he cracked him from the very beginning. BTW, here’s your addition to the ask about Rin loving Haru for who he is and seeing him for who he is. I’m just in love with that moment, because I’m happy that he just... not only he knows him, but bc he’s not one of those many idiots who just don’t get it.
"Nanase-kun seems like he can do anything all by himself, doesn't he? He's good at studying and sports and even art. He really can do anything, right? That's why everyone relies on him, but it would really be something for Nanase-kun to rely on anyone, wouldn't it?"
Rin certainly thought this was true. He had only just transferred, but the image that Rin had of Haruka was exactly that. But even if Haruka didn't have the will to go out and get involved with other people on his own, it wasn't like he was completely isolated. On the contrary, he was considered the most reliable person in their class, and when people relied on him, he always did his best to meet their expectations. This was the strange balance that people around Haruka had to maintain.
3. The one when Haru calls Rin by his name for the first time. And I honestly for some reason didn’t even realize that this moment was in the anime until my 3rd rewatch (lol), but, man, little Rin’s reaction is the most adorable ever. I cry.
4. When Gou meets Haru for the first time and immediately goes “ah so you’re Haruka Nanase, the one, who my brother talks about 24/7...‘Nanase is so cool, Nananse is so fast!’” and Rin just goes red lmfaaaaaooooo.
5. When Haru says that he feels the fever running through his body each time he just sees Rin, but he doesn’t understand what it means... ahem.... OH WELL
6. When Rin tells them he’s leaving and Haru gets absolutely furious and calls him a selfish jerk, but then he feels his legs giving out and he thinks that he needs to be in the water, but then he realizes, that for the first time in his life it won’t save him and he’s so lost and fucking crushed. "you can’t just mess up my whole life and leave me like that” and “this can’t be true, I can’t be this weak.” aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa fucking hellish angst... that mix of emotions was seriously hideous, at first he was so confused and in denial, he couldn’t even think, he literally went “who is leaving?” and then it just all blew up. Poor baby.
7. Just all the little moments, when Rin notices everything Haru does and falls in love a bit more each time. Like when Haru slowed down, when he saw that Nagisa is having troubles of keeping up with him.
Nagisa was earnestly trying to keep up with Haruka. If he kept up that pace, he wouldn't be able to run next to Haruka for the whole trip. That was how it had been yesterday. Nagisa's breath was coming short, and when Haruka saw him slow down a pace, he lightly turned his eyes downward. I guess that's as far as he goes.
A sigh mixed with Haruka's long breaths. Then, by just a tiny increment, Haruka let his pace slacken.
"Oh?" Rin said quietly. Haruka could almost hear him saying "You're so nice, Nanase," and he tsked inwardly. Nagisa caught up to him, smiling as if it hurt a bit. It looked like he'd lost the energy to keep talking.
Just cute, and they watched each other all the time, it’d be a bitch to count each one, but god, all of them were cute.
8. All the moments of Haru pulling Rin’s pigtails... hilarious, especially the RinRin one, but the funniest and my favorite was when Nagisa turned to Haru to ask him for a permision to call Rin Rin-Rin, like... all the rights to Rin belong to Haru and vice versa lmao I agree. “I’ll allow it” lolz shut it, Haru.
9. This moment: “Something happened inside of him that made Haruka incredibly angry, he was so pissed, that he didn’t even want to swim anymore. To think that someone like Rin could make him feel such powerful swirl of emotions and make him such a mess... he felt disgusted with himself.” Yeah, Haru, love is dat bitch when you’re 13 lol
10. The one where Haru whispers “sorry for making you feel that way” to Rin? The one where Rin’s grandma doesn’t want to go to see the relay, but then she suddenly does, when she finds out that her grandson’s future husband is in it? The “he at that moment realized that the only thing Rin was concerned about was Haruka” one? I don’t fucking know, you pick haha ANY MOMENT, ALL THE MOMENTS XD
______
BUT in all seriousness, I do not get how you can love Makoharu after the novels. Like do people just ignore these moments:
“Haru waved Makoto off like an annoying fly”, “feeling annoyed by his obnoxious care, Haruka went right past him”, “feeling like Makoto’s smile could turn into tears any second now, Haru turned away and went to the showers” (fuck this shit I’m out lmao), “complitely ignoring him, Haru kept walking”.
??????? is this... does anyone find this amazing??????!!!!!!!!!!!
Or when Haru was literally fucking losing it, cause Makoto just repeated everything after him and how he just lost all the respect in that moment.
“I feel like I should also get into running.” Makoto said it as it was a joke, but Haru knew for sure that it wasn’t. More than that, he knew, that Makoto was going to ask him that ever since the moment he found out that Haru was running this morning. Haruka fel annoyed, because he couldn’t find the excuse to refuse him.
Or this moment:
“Makoto was late and Haruka didn’t have any reasons to wait for him. Makoto can catch up with him on the way, they’ll meet at the swimming club either way. For both of them it’ll be better, if Haru went by himself, than stood there and waited Makoto, slowly losing his temper.”
“Haruka felt uncomfortable, cause Makoto looked at him, as if was a weak”
Or this:
"Did you know I was going to come out here?" Even though he knew it was impossible, Makoto couldn't stop himself from asking.
"Nope."
"Then, why…" are you standing in a place like this?
"Watching the sunset."
and I can go on and on and on
and the fishies... oh my fucking god, the fishies
***
I’m just saying, all these moments are not even funny. My point in all this, that like no matter how much Haru loves Makoto as a friend... or got used to him is what I personally think, I don’t think he’s ever gonna idk how to say this... respect him as a human being? admire him? And this whole situation... I just can’t appreciate such kind of relationships even in a friends way.
1stly because Makoto’s behavior in general makes me have war flashbacks to some of my real life experiences (and yeah, I confess, it affected me and that’s why I don’t like his character a lot; because I don’t think many people know what it’s like to deal with these kind of people in general). 2ndly, cause Makoto fans keep trashing Haru and many call him selfish bc of the way he treats him, but what they don’t understand is that if it wasn’t for Haru being this harsh, Makoto would literally became even doormat-y than he is now (yes, it’s possible lmao).
P.S. my favorite in the novels tbh is all the Haru “I’m surrounded by idiots” moments, like when they started to dig the frozen soil with little scrapes and he was looking at them like they’re morons and then just silently walked away and came back with a giant shovel... “if you keep doing this with your tiny scoopers, we’re gonna be here all night” and they then they just watched him as he did everything himself LMFAO I just love him so freaking much. I also think his relationship with Nagisa are incredible and so underrated, since it’s a huge and incredible part of the books. I just keep saying, Haru’d be an amazing dad, so I can’t wait for him and Rin to adopt xD
P.P.S. And what about the Free! novelization????!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA
#answered#anonymous#rinharu#harurin#Free!#free! iwatobi swim club#free#rin matsuoka#nanase haruka#sharkbait#Haru x Rin#rin x haru#did i not get something? wasn't the high speed a horrible thing for mh?#cause it seemed like that to me
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hello!! it’s the anon who did the long somi analysis. id love to be a regular anon :D may I be 🐳 anon if that’s not taken? so somi and seungmin were raised together huh… im gonna guess and say that they were often put against each other by their parents/tutor. yk, typical parents being like “why aren’t you getting good grades like so and so”. they probably feel pressured to always be on the top. you can see how important seungmin’s academic position is to him — it’s what he’s known for on campus. then here comes somi just taking the french trip away from him. we can assume this type of competition happens often between the two bc of how similar they are and the fact that they’ve known each other since they were young. I cant wait to hear her side of the story on the French trip tbh, bc it seems from her pov, she didn’t do anything wrong. it might be bc of her skewed mentality of doing whatever it takes to succeed, but who knows… maybe she really didn’t do anything wrong. anyways, i find it interesting how somi has seungmin saved as “Minnie 💕”… maybe this is a one sided rivalry?? does somi have a lil crush 👀👀 (cant blame her tho… i too would have a crush on seungmin lmao). either way, somi seems to have a soft side for seungmin and sees him as a (possible) friend. the girl just has bad social skills akdjdjd. that’s all I really have to say!! this ask was supposed to only be me saying I wanted to be a reg anon but i blabbed about my theories again ajdjdjd. oh well :’) ((also, jeongin and y/n be sus lmao… that’s all I have to say on those two ajdjdjd))
ofc! welcome to the fam 🐳 anon~
interesting view on the backstory, i've only revealed the tiniest of details about it but you're quick on the uptake huh 🤧♥️. there's gonna be a lot of seungmin backstory reveal soon, i'm excited for it, watch out for that but yes, there seems to be more to their connection than just being childhood friends 👀. even pulling out the contact name observation eh? hehehee it's gonna come into explanation soon 🙈
and ofc, don't worry about getting immersed in the theories, i love hearing all of your thoughts!! ♥️
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107-third degree
The lightless flame?? Please stay safe Jon...
Ah right, we're in America.
Mm Jon thinks someones following him, and I want to agree that he's probably just being jumpy. Usually I would immediately assume that someone is definitely following him since he mentioned it, but Jonny is a genius writer and makes his characters be paranoid and consistently wrong about stuff so I honestly don't know.
Ok wait... Gertrude isn't actually Gerrard's mom this guy just assumed that, right? Ya. Cause Gerrards mom is Mary.
Usher foundation? Is that another sister institute? I wonder if there's a mundane reason for there being a bunch of them or if there's a spooky reason there's a bunch spread all over the world? Or.. Is there a bunch or is it just those three?
Oh Gerrard died from a seizure? A spooky seizure? Or... I think it was mentioned he had cancer? Or was that someone else?
A cop?
Jon maybe... Maybe don't use your compelling so much. Especially with this guy watching you.
Ok ya Gerard had cancer.
Oh? She broke into where they were keeping his body?? Maybe he wasn't dead? Or she did spooky things to him and he undied? Cause like Ya he showed up at some point after he was dead right?
Also not sure how I feel about Gertrude always pretending to be Gerrards mother? Like... Probably better than Marry tbh, but considering what she did to Michael I'm worried for our Gerrard.
Also! This is completely off topic, but they never did explain how Jon tracked down Jude Perry or Mike Crew?? Like he just found them?? Was that spooky eye stuff, like he just Knew where they were? Like how he just knew Gerrard worked with Gertrude? Or was there an explanation but I missed it? -anyway.
Jon's not feeling well? Maybe he used his compelling too much.
Oooh! Spooky thing? She did spooky things to his dead body? ...good spooky things or bad spooky things...?
Ya stop compelling people u dum dum ur gonna make yourself sick. Or maybe it's cause he's away from the institute?
Elias! ):<
Oh. Ya maybe reading a statement will make him feel better? Tho didn't Elias say reading them was draining or something?
Hmm is this guy who's interrogating him maybe that other Archivist?
Ah yes lightless flame.
Ya it sounds like this guy is compelling him.
Weird... Is this guy with both the lightless flame and the eye? Or can all avatars compel people?
Ey! He's feeling better! So the statement did help. Maybe it was draining only in the beginning, I think in context Elias was talking about when Jon first started reading statements when he said they were draining.
Also is that a smile I hear in Jons voice!! Did he just smile? ;-; please read all the statements u need Jon.
Uh oh.
Julia?
"Who are you"
"You don't know me?"
"Should I?"
"No! -i guess. Just, I mean, everyone normally seems to."
"Good for you."
"Not really."
XD I love this exchange. She doesn't seem so bad. As far as people who try to kill Jon go anyway.
Ooo is she a hunter?
"Kidnapped... Again." XD Jon.
Yes! Someone who pronounces Gerrard correctly!!! Ahhh!
Oh. She's the daughter of Robert Montauk? (Who's he again?)
Nonojon don't ask any questions. You know how bad of an idea that is with avatars she's obviously an avatar -oh no.
"Hunting" ey I was right! (please don't be hunting Jon!)
What's happening? They got pulled over... Is she hunting the police guy who was following Jon? Maybe that's why she kidnapped him? To lure out the police guy?
Why's he so suspicious of her? Just cause Jon seems to not have his passport or whatever with him? I mean ya she's being a bit- ohaksbdkdhsbdbdjdhdn!? What? Did she just shoot him??
What? Oh there was a guy in the trunk and he shot the police guy? How'd they know he would look in the trunk?
Ey!! Vampire dude!
Ok so ya sounds like they were hunting the police guy. I wonder why he was following jon anyway?
I'm so excited to finally meet vampire dude! He was always so cool! Sjhdkdjsj
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my guess is the whole cognition thing was meant to vary between individual targets since they see the world differently, thus allowing for different moments like one allowing the PT to change outfits (I haven't played PQ2 so I have no idea how cognition works in that game sry) prolly to make the writing process more flexible so things like that wouldn't be plot holes, buuuut I don't think it worked (or the frantic rewriting led to them just not caring like "eh it's a nitpick they won't care")
I’d agree, but considering this is such a key piece of lore, you’d think they’d mention it (again you’d think, but this is P5, no one needs to think, not even the writers 8U). Tho there is one thing that might play into what you are saying (spoiler for below: it’s the threat count). In all honesty I’m been wracking my brain around Shido’s Ship, MC’s initial summon, and PQ2′s lobby (esp since my last post, linked below when talking about Futaba).....and the only thing I can figure out a reason is probably this (under cut because I’ve lost control of my life, actually no I’ve always been long winded...aka....under the cut cause of the usual 8U):
(also they have their shoes off here, and then shoes on after the cutscene, makes no sense, just a daily reminder of this 8U) The only time Mona is in his “outfit” and no one else is-is when:
The person hasn’t obtained their Persona yet
After the MC obtained his Persona, his clothes reverted back (only to come back when he has to do another tutorial fight), it takes till the next day for him to constantly have his outfit on. (but it’s stated it’s because he doesn’t have full control over his power yet)
Shido’s ship when the girls changed into swimsuits
PQ2′s lobby (everyone else’s outfit disappears).
Uhhhh when they first go to Mementos, before they descend (tho once they do their outfits change) (that being said they said it’s cause of “the Shadows knowing they are there”....wait)
Futaba’s dungeon at the beginning as seen above
Oh almost forgot Sae, before you go inside her Palace, at the entrance and before that you don’t change, but after you meet her the Shadow deems you as a threat then even at the entrance you a deemed a threat.....BUT after you are caught you aren’t deemed a threat (but even Goro isn’t deemed one but....sigh). And I guess the interrogation room your clothes don’t change.
#1′s easy and consistent so no need to look at that. Just seems to mean Mona is susceptible to all and any level of cognition/distortion.
#2 is really interesting and wish we got more of it (or at least explained more cause....I have questions) esp since it seems to be explained by #6 (that being said, they said it’s cause he doesn’t have full control over his power so.....¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I’ll try to fix it with later reasoning but hey it’s hard when the game has multiple answers for the same gd question lying to us trying to convince us it’s consistent when it’s not). In #2′s setting the MC isn’t considered a threat yet, at least his IRL identity isn’t. It’s only after he really talks to Kamo after escaping the dungeon, do we see a change the next time he goes in (aka Kamo saw him as a threat). Tho, here’s my question to that he also instantly sees Anne and Ryuji as a threat not long after they gain their Personas. Ryuji I get it, there’s always been animosity, but you’d think Anne wouldn’t be able to touch him IRL. so she’d be outfit-less outside of fights. It’d also make me question why, if they’ve never met a target IRL did they have their outfits equip? I mean iirc their outfits didn’t change for Okumura, and the reasoning is that he sees EVERYONE regardless of who they are, EVEN HIS OWN DAUGHTER as a threat! And tbh that makes sense for his dungeon. And you could retroactively apply this to previous dungeons (minus Kamo and Futaba) but......why wait till the 5TH GD DUNGEON FOR THIS KEY PIECE OF INFO??? *inhales* lfjksdafj;af
#3, watch me become an olympic pretzel trying to make this square peg fit into a round hole. By changing into swim suites the girls are not deemed as a threat, and will change into PT outfits if/when threatened like what happened for the MC on his first day. Except, PT outfits are kinda like Keyblades and are always with the characters, so.....even if they took them off they should just appear back on. Esp if Shido is like Okumura and deems everyone a threat, the PT don’t have control of their outfits to a big extent, the world overrides their wants the majority of the time (aka if they see you as a threat, you’re a threat no choice in the matter. BUT the one time the outfits overrule the world, is if the user is under a threat despite the world deeming them to not be one).
#4 I don’t know. Maybe the PT aren’t deemed as a threat, or the shadows don’t know they are there (can’t be because they are n00bs tho)? From what I can find/remember it’s not explained. That being said, P3/4 guys should 100% have PT outfits in that game, no if ands or butts. The ONLY thing different between PQ2′s world and the Metaverse is that they can’t use guns (BUT they can have outfits). And the lack of outfits for the P3/4 cast is lore breaking in and of itself. No really, I explain it all here (most of it is showing how the lore was built up throughout the game so it backs up the conclusion, but the real smoking gun is Futaba, so just ctrl+F “Futaba” and it brings you to the conclusion).
#5 *sigh* that stupid reasoning aside, I’m not against the idea (but it’s inconsistent, because wouldn’t Shadow!Kamo deem him a threat as well, and be forced to keep his outfit on? “Oh but he’s a n00b” no game, you have three explanations for one gd thing and they don’t mix well together pick one and stick with it...threat level via the host not Shadow makes a lot of sense just keep that one). Technically Mementos is its own palace, so not going inside it would mean you aren’t a threat to that Palace. Which I could work with. BUT since this is the public’s Palace, and they don’t know who the PT are....shouldn’t they not change yet? It’d be more impactful if over the course of the game, as they got popular they were finally deemed a threat to society and thus the gained an (consistently of course, with the outfit triggering for battle) outfit when they walked in.
#6 Makes sense tbh, tho, while I’m on board with it, it does make me wonder how far the threat level reaches.......is it at the entrance? Is it the entire plane? What is it? Also it’s high key stupid that they were deemed a threat by Futaba’s Shadow, esp if her Shadow has her best interests in mind....this dungeons just a mess from start to finish it makes no sense.
#7 Haha...really makes me wonder how far the threat level stretches. Because Mementos it’s not till you get inside the station that they deem you a threat, so there seems to be a distance thing (I mean so is pulling people in but we don’t need consistency :’D). Cause if they are far enough (which they are they freaking checked that their clothes don’t change), then there’s no need to worry about her “suspecting Goro” (cause his outfit would change otherwise, but since they are far enough they don’t have to worry)....BUT by her sending him and her to the Metaverse, that’d mean she DOES suspect him.....so wait what’s the point of her “not suspecting him”??????? It’d also be more interesting if Mako and Goro didn’t change outfits, because she doesn’t suspect them but kelsfjldkjfa
P5: We’re so smartMe: Why do you keep doing dumb shit then????
Anyway I’d agree with you that maybe they wanted to be flexible, but they don’t......provide the ground work for that. It def feels like they threw shit together and didn’t think we’d notice. I mean there are A LOT of writers in this game, that could explain the consistency issues. I mean it explains it not excuses it, they had years to fix it (unlike Ultimax it seems, that shit was ruuuuuuushed in such a short time).
Anyway if they wanted to make it flexible, they’d make it consistently the IRL Palace host’s threat level/way of thinking (not the Shadow self, nothing else, just the host). Cause everything, even their shadows in P5, reflects their state of mind. It’d also make for great visual storytelling too, such as Kamo deeming all the guys threats after he realizes he can’t control them, and never viewing Anne as a threat (aka showcasing he can get away with it). It’d give Okumura’s “doesn’t even trust his own daughter” thing even more weight when we got to it. Or Futaba’s complete and utter desperation to be helped more impact as well (it’d at least be a step to fixing that horrible Palace, eff it’s lore and the sphinx it rode in on). It could showcase another Palace hosts’ growing anxiety, and how they trusted people but now trust no one since the start of the dungeon. It could showcase their preferences (aka Kamoshida views rebelling males vs subjecting males/any females), or maybe they don’t like cats so Mona’s appearance is veeeery wonky in one. It could be a great way to reveal different things about the Host in a short amount of time, but this is P5 and we don’t care~! :D DX
Then again this might butt heads with the Cognitive versions, but then there’s no reasoning behind MC’s inability to maintain his outfit the first day (or why no one else has this issue). No the n00b thing makes no sense (esp since it consistently shows up when there’s trouble and disappears when trouble is gone, so it seems less about control than it is only essential when there’s danger around), because we still have the Shadow explanation from Mementos to go by and Shadow Futaba’s threat level too. But I’d say it’s totally possible that they can both exist (if explained right), Cognitive selves show 100% what that person thinks of them, while if they deem them a threat or not only affects if their outfit appears (because that is tied to the cognitive world, not the real person). With the cognitive selves serving as insight and an explanation as to why the host doesn’t deem that specific person as a threat.
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So the oldest show I see you talk about is usually The Facts of Life but usually you don't go much further than 80s and 90s. I am very curious to know if you have favorites from the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s (not including TFOL obviously)? And explanations why! Hopefully something to keep your brain occupied during quarantine.
Ha, I was about to point out that TFOL was technically started in 1979 haha and thank you for the question
When I got this ask, the first thing that came to mind was The Twilight Zone. I’ll save my rant about that and some other shows under the cut.
Tbh, I haven’t gotten into a lot of classics pre-1980/1979-ish. I’ve had I Love Lucy in “My Stuff” on Hulu for, like, years now, but I haven’t sat down and watched the whole thing. I definitely watched multiple episodes back when it was on Nick at Nite. If it was on Nick and Nite in the 90s or in some other form of syndication, I’ve seen at least a few episodes. Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie, Gilligan’s Island, Andy Griffith, Mary Tyler Moore, Dick Van Dyke, etc.
A lot of older shows that I want to watch just aren’t available anywhere, or they weren’t available when I last looked. One that springs to mind immediately is Maude. It isn’t available anywhere past paying about $20 for the first season on Amazon prime which…I’m not really able to do atm. I know that features a younger Bea Arthur and touches on some controversial issues including gay rights and abortion and so many progressive causes I’d love to see. I think I’m more interested in that than the show it spun off of, All in the Family.
Other shows I’ve had difficulty finding but want to watch:
Diff’rent Strokes (at least for the backdoor pilot of TFOL lol but it’s only on Hulu with the Starz add-on, which I don’t have)
The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show
Kate & Allie (1980s but I have to complain about how it’s fucking nOWHERE AND I JUST WANNA WATCH JANE CURTIN)
Anyways, for shows that first came to mind at this ask:
The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle: Since I grew up with baby boomer parents, this was right up their alley back when they were kids, particularly my mom, since she was around 7 when the show started. We owned some episodes, if not the whole thing, on DVD when I was little and I loved it. My grandmother would tell us “Fractured Fairy Tales” a la one of the segments. I excitedly saw the movie back when it came out. I truly just enjoy the show, even if its “just” meant for kids. It’s fun and sweet and I obviously love good, dumb puns.
Also, two of my favorite Rocky Horror callbacks reference it. One of the most famous and classic callbacks is the Rocky Horror Roll Call: “Janet!” “Dr. Scott!” “JANET!” “BRAD!” “Rocky!” “BULLWINKLE!!!!”
One of them isn’t as common, I’m guessing because you have to know Rocky and Bullwinkle past the name to get it. “I grow veary of this vorld! When do we return to Transylvania, HUH?” “AFTER WE CAPTURE MOOSE AND SQUIRREL!”
And a theater back in Kansas did a fringe festival production of Rocky Horror mixed with Rocky and Bullwinkle called, of course, The Rocky & Bullwinkle Picture Show. It was hilarious.
Laugh-In: Did anyone else have a bit of a TV schedule memorized for when you were sick, or was that just me? Lol back in elementary school, this would play on one channel and I’d normally watch an episode of it and then normally, like, Hamtaro after that lol I have specific memories of both of them ;alsdjk. It’s obviously best known for launching careers of many comedians, including Goldie Hawn and Lily Tomlin. And, of course, the time Nixon appeared on it to say “Sock it to me!” The 30 Rock parodies of it cracked me up.
I just found out that at least one season is on Amazon Prime which makes me very happy.
The Twilight Zone: For someone who loves sitcoms and pretty much refuses to watch any prestige TV dramas, I really fucking love TWZ. One of my weirder life/pop culture goals is to see every episode in every incarnation, the first one having the most episodes and seasons (5 seasons, over 150 episodes) starting back in 1959. It’s particularly a weird one for me because I can be a bit easily spooked—like, I can’t do true crime whatsoever, it freaks me tf out and when I read through cases of things like that I have to watch something lighthearted or else I won’t be able to sleep lol. TWZ is easier for me, though. I also grew up with a lot of this on DVD due to, again, my baby boomer parents growing up with it.
I’ve seen an episode of the 2002/2003 reboot, the remake of one of the best (and most famous) episodes, “The Eye of the Beholder”, and I watched the first two episodes of Jordan Peele’s reboot, but haven’t finished the season. Ultimately, while I enjoyed his first episode, which I found very original, and his retake on the classic "there’s a gremlin on the wing of the plane!” episode, I find that doing an hour long show is just not a smart move when it comes to TWZ. For a bit of fun trivia, TWZ was originally cancelled after its third season, but CBS brought it back to replace two half hour shows mid-season, meaning the show had to be an hour long for s4, when it was originally only half an hour. S4, last I checked, isn’t even available on Netflix and seems to only be on Hulu. It was pretty much considered a failure to everyone and when you look at lists of the best twilight zone episodes, most people either ignore s4 or will throw one in while basically saying “well, we SHOULD include at least ONE…”
TWZ really showed how much you can fit into half an hour, and a lot of the episodes feel so much longer—in a good way, of course. While back then there were less commercials so the shows could be slightly longer (25 minutes according to Wikipedia compared to 22-23 minutes nowadays), it still managed to pull you in and hold your attention and not overstay its welcome. I find that the hour long versions of the show make it harder to stay engaged and the pacing really has to slow down to fill in the space.
However, I do enjoy how each incarnation has used sci-fi/fantasy to approach fears and prejudices of the time. I know the 2002 reboot redid “The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street” which, back in the original ‘59 series, was about fear of communists and the like, and made it about fear of terrorists and Islamaphobia. Jordan Peele’s obviously tackled a lot of racism and I know the third episode, without having seen it, was about police brutality against black people. The show definitely has the potential to tackle heavy subjects in a great way, I just think its a show meant to be half an hour.
And another side rant, TWZ >>>> Black Mirror. I’ve read through the summaries of every Black Mirror episode and have seen a couple, including the perfection of “San Junipero”. Besides that episode, I really don’t like the show? TWZ managed to be original and have varying endings and had messages besides “technology bad”. It’s why I can like “San Junipero” for being so unlike the other episodes. I’ve enjoyed some of the twists I’ve read, but a lot of it just rings hollow compared to TWZ for me.
So, that’s about it for classic shows I could call favorites, though, tbh, TWZ is probably the first I’d say is a favorite of these or any pre-1980s show.
In general, since the 90s shows defined my childhood, I’ve been enjoying watching those during this pandemic for nostalgia and comfort. I’m cycling through two shows I’ve watched all of before (3rd Rock from the Sun and Cybill) as well as one I’ve possibly seen all the episodes of but only through syndication and never straight through (The Nanny). But depending on how long we’re here, maybe I’ll get a chance to watch some of these older classics on my list!
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If you didn't read the last chapter of Tsurune don't read the ask: OMG! I almost get killed in this "Masa-san lightly pinched Minato’s cheeks and pulled them" and in the car scene.I laughed so hard on minato he's really didn't think about hiding his feeling lol. what do you think about the chapter?
Took me almost two full days to reply to this, and if that doesn’t speak volumes about how wild this chapter was, then I don’t know what would.
I’d read spoilers of volume 2 right after it came out so I already knew what was gonna go down, and being very honest, the cheek pinching was something I’d actually expected to see at some point after reading the summaries of volume 1. And rather than wishing for it, I was waiting for it because it seemed so obvious to me that this was gonna happen one way or another. I mean, it’s just so much like Masaki to do something of that sort, lmao. But I admit I expected it to happen in a daily-situation scene and not… like this. As always, Ayano surpassed my expectations on the unapologetically huge amounts of gay.
I’ve mentioned this topic in my post about the differences between the novel and the anime. Minato may keep a lot of secrets from everyone, yet Masaki has been the sole exception to this ever since they met. I mean, look at volume 1. It’s basically Minato hiding nearly every important thing from literally everybody except his conveniently-there-by-narrative-default master. Volume 2′s chapter 3 is basically a massive meme based off this plot device, like:Shuu: *touches Masaki*Minato: Sir, that’s my emotional support coach.Anyway, my point is that Minato doesn’t hide anything from Masaki, ever. Not even the most embarrassing shit.
The chapter was very interesting. It was rather entretaining to see how inept Eisuke actually is regarding himself. The novel often references Amanojaku, so I was wondering if we’d ever get an Amanojaku-ish character, and sure enough, here he is.
Other than that, good God. Minato is such a fucking embarrassment. I adore this walking fivehead so much. Had to put the extent of my love for him and this chapter under a cut because it’s probably the lenghtiest ask response I’ve ever written.
I think I can’t even pinpoint what the best thing about this chapter was. Like, the details are very subtly placed in all the right spots as always, and this is probably what leaves the bigger impressions on me. And by “details” I mean the subtext and symbolisms.
For starters, Ayano knows very well how to fuck with plant language nerds. She’s used a lot of it with Masaki and Minato, and it feels like the bar just keeps going up. First it was oaks (strength and knowledge), then bamboo (inspiration), then azaleas (developing passion), and now it’s freaking bellflowers. What’s more: the ones that Minato stopped by were spotted bellflowers. They’re known for their heart-shaped foliage. In flower language, bellflowers stand for gratitude and unwavering love. And sure enough, Minato doesn’t waver at all before going into that bakery and buying a batch of cinnamon buns (did it really have to be that of all things, omg) for Masaki, specifically.
I can’t stress how wholly, completely, utterly unnecessary that was. There’s no heterosexual explanation to it. I mean, there’s no heterosexual explanation to a lot of things about these two, but the romantic connotation was really heavy on this one. You have to use a fucking magnifier to find the platonic in this bullshit, and it’s still hella hard to ignore the implications. It’s even harder when Minato is berating himself for buying the buns on impulse when he heard that they go well with coffee and thinking about how irritated he feels when Shuu is around Masaki. He doesn’t even try to pretend that he’s not jealous. Be more like any other oblivious sports anime protagonist and let me die in peace, for fuck’s sake.
I’m just trying to pretend that I don’t know cinnamon is associated with romantic love and often used to inflame passion, because that’s too fucking much.
On other news, I’m highly pleased that we get SeiKai hints even when Seiya and Kaito don’t show up together. Kaito mentioning Seiya’s name every two or three sentences and approaching Minato simply because he saw Kuma and thought that maybe Seiya was there was gold, tbh. It was a good break before the mattress fire that happens right after.
The way Minato found out that Masaki meant well and didn’t want him to become like he was in the past was just so priceless. Take this shit straight to the face, son. Get fucking wrecked by how much he cares about you.
It’s also really freaking hilarious to me how everything that concerns Minato’s relationship with Masaki involves shoujo manga tropes. Envious of your rightful rival being too long around your master? Check. Learning the hard way that it was all for your sake? Check. Getting frustrated and shouting like a bitch at the irony of it? Check.
Minato is Minato, though, so of course he acknowledges that he wants Masaki by his side in spite of this. Did he have to do that while lying in bed, though? I think the fuck not.
And cue Masaki texting him immediately while he’s doing that, because Masaki always shows up when he wants to see him, and because this has turned into a romantic comedy, apparently? Love me that age-old cliché where the main character goes to the window after getting a message and finds the person who’d been occupying their thoughts standing there by sheer unadulterated coincidence, and they fucking heard you, you little shit.
This comes in a set with the “first visit and you’re already inviting him to his room” trope because why not follow all the way down with the romcom narration structure since we’re already at it? Double entendrees every three phrases or so because go big or go home.
“Dad isn’t home yet, so should we go upstairs?”
Yeah, lmao, that’s what about every shoujo heroine says before getting lectured on how they “shouldn’t make that sort of invitation to a guy”.
“It feels great. Thank you, Masa-san.”
It doesn’t feel so great not being able to overlook this, Ayano.
“Well, I may not look it, but I am your master after all.”
SHUT THE FUCK UP, JESUS CHRIST.
Seriously, this shit only loses to Fifty Shades of Takehaya and his more than unasked-for lines about “punishing” and “thoroughly training” Kaito. Sure, none of this is on the level of dirty jokes, but the subtleties are still too many.
The fluff is what gets you good, though. Because that was fluff right there. No, it doesn’t classify as hurt/comfort. These bastards fluffy. I just wanna know who managed to stay upright after reading about Minato feeling his heart ache because it had been too long since the last time he’d seen Masaki smile at him, ‘cause I sure as fuck didn’t.
No time is wasted before they off their asses to the place where they first met, which is basically a world of their own at nighttime (it’s named Yata Shrine for a reason; fuck that reason). And of course there had to be your usual load of elusive language in the middle, where the destination is pitch-dark but the road there is all wildlife and stars and this sparkly wave of light at the end of the tunnel. Welcome to the land of bitch, this isn’t a shoujo, stop acting like one.
Or don’t. We’re indulging. Screaming internally the entire time, but still indulging.
The dialogue is so obviously crafted to seem like something else that it’s useless to pretend it wasn’t inentional. I already knew what was coming but reading about the whole thing was an experience.
“I’m happy that you became my coach at Kazemai but I’m also not, because I don’t get to keep you for myself.”
Did he have to say it like that? Abso-fucking-lutely not. But he did anyway, because since when does Narumiya Minato give a flying fuck about ambiguity versus precision?
Six kinds of gay here. And all of them confirm that Minato’s “mixed feelings” when seeing Kaito being so familiar with Masaki from the get-go were, in fact, pure jealousy. It’s not even envy, because that’s wanting something someone has and you don’t. Minato was even closer to Masaki than Kaito was at that point, so it was all just his Masaki-exclusive greed speaking, plain and simple.
This is what gets me about this scene, tbh. It’s so much like Minato to say that, but it’s so alien to read it in a shounen novel. I don’t recall seeing anything so direct and raw in any sports franchise aside from Yuri on Ice. The most we get is “I wanna do [insert sport here] with you”. But this case is a blatant “we’d be doing the thing we like together one way or another and I’d have preferred if no one else were involved”.
And this comes right before we get a reminder that Minato doesn’t like it when Masaki treats him as a child, again. That’s… something. I hate this something a lot.
Also, it feels like the two of them are having completely different conversations with each other. Masaki is talking about his struggle coaching Minato and pointing out the crap he has to deal with in having a student whose last words are probably gonna be something stupid like “oops” or “oh, shit”, and Minato is countering with apparently completely unrelated arguments.
“But didn’t you let Shuu touch your belly, Masa-san?”
The fuck does that have to do with anything? How is that of any relevance to the conversation? What is this gay nonsense?
“If anyone else heard only that, I’d sound like a pervert, wouldn’t I? Did you want to touch it too, Minato?”
JUST DISMISS IT, YOU MOTHERFUCKER. DON’T ENCOURAGE HIS FOLLY. LET IT DIE.
“I’m no pervert, so I’m good.”
And now the moment of crushing honesty is over. Time for lies and derision because we all saw earlier in this chapter that (I can’t believe I’m actually writing this) Minato did, in fact, want to touch Masaki. Boy just called himself a pervert, indirectly. Gotta congratulate him for playing himself for, like, the hundredth time, I guess.
Of course Masaki would get emo in this scene sooner or later, because the fact that he’s dealing with the most reckless character out of the cast is apparently not a pertinent reason for things to have ended up the way they did. And of course Minato was gonna do something about it. It’s almost obligatory by now that they lift each other up.
WHY LIKE THIS, THOUGH?
Like, there’s just too much here that doesn’t translate into a master-student thing. Okay, I can totally see that in the dialogue but the actions are screaming something else entirely. Obviously, as I always say, I’m not gonna label it as romantic. What I’m talking about is: this isn’t the behavior of someone interacting with a teacher, but of a person with another. I mean, no matter how you look at it, there would have been a lot to consider here regarding the minimum of restraint that one should have around their mentor or at least around their elders, but Minato is basically saying “fuck you” to all of this.
Yeah, sure, go reach out to grab his hand and gently brush his bangs off his eyes simply because you can’t help the urge to look into them. No big deal. It’s just the affection of a disciple. Anyone else would have done the exact same.
I JUST WANNA TALK, AYANO. I JUST WANNA TALK.
Not trying to stereotype or devalue the worth of teacher-student relationships. Just back to my previous point: you don’t do this shit to a teacher, realistically speaking. And even if anyone hypothetically had any gall to do that, neither the teacher nor any onlooker would disconsider it an advance. Anybody would find it a little bit out of place at the very, very least.
Also, that declaration? Literally Minato swearing he would have Masaki be the one teaching him for the rest of his life? This after having said similar bullshit like claiming that he would never let Masaki go or that he’d follow Masaki to the grave. The bar just keeps going up. So, in short, “you don’t have to be my master but I’ll be damned if you’re not my master forever”.
Ayano, you’re murdering us. You’re murdering your readers.
“I feel more relaxed when I talk to you, Masa-san.”
No news here but thank you for saying it anyway. There had to be icing on this cake. And the cherry on top was Masaki’s explanation about the word “talking”. Are you telling us that these idiots hand their hearts over to each other every time they open up like this, Ayano? IS THAT WHAT YOU’RE FUCKING SAYING, AYANO?
Love me all of Minato’s non-existent heterosexuality being killed with fire.
I imagine that Minato must have made the cutest face when seeing Fuu again. Fuu, the owl with a heart-shaped face, showing up at the most convenient time. Because heart-shaped leaves weren’t enough, apparently.
The end of this chapter made me feel a tiny bit bad for Shuu, though, because it was one more instance of something that he and Minato and no one else had in common that got overwritten and outshone. It’s definitely a parallel to when they were little kids learning under Saionji and hiding it from everyone until a certain point, yelling at the top of their lungs and being competitive while taking things seriously to an extent. Here, we have Minato and Masaki in perfect sync, reproducing the exact same thing that Shuu and Minato had learned so many years ago but with experient successfulness and also complete harmony. And this time, it’s 100% their secret only, taking place at night without the knowledge of anybody, with no audience, no parents and no teacher.
It’s… too much, lmao. In every sense. Shuu literally stands no fucking chance next to Masaki and I love it. *broadcast lady voice* Fujiwara Shuu. Repeating; Fujiwara Shuu. Your wife Senichi is waiting for you at Kirisaki High.
And of course, the chapter had to be closed with a finishing blow. God fucking dammit. Minato packing coffee to share with Masaki would have been enough, but nay, Masaki also had to bring the fucking oyaki. From the fact that they’ve had oyaki together before at the shrine and that these oyaki are from the bakery where Minato had bought the cinnamon rolls without a second thought, it’s sort of really obvious that Masaki bought them to eat together with him.
I didn’t ask for any of this and now I need to lie the fuck down.
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Mighty Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder rant
Seeing Natalie Portman returning to reprise her role as Jane Foster, nevertheless wielding Mjolnir, finally getting the treatment this character deserves, was surreal to say the least. I had just started reading Lords of Midgard, the 8th issue of Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018), and had fallen in love already. But I didn't suspect at all that Taika Waititi would pull this card in Thor: Love and Thunder, considering Jane was barely mentioned in Ragnarok. The news about my favorite actress portraying one of my favorite characters coming out of the blue - you can imagine the excitement. Alas, I quickly remembered what the fandom thought of that comic (at least on tumblr) and imagined it now growing tenfold, cuz not everyone in the MCU fandom reads comics but pretty much everyone wants to watch another Thor movie. And yes, many fans weren't ready for this step, still recovering from Sam Wilson getting the shield in Endgame. Which is completely fine. We're not obligated to like everything Marvel throws in our faces, we're allowed to criticize and express our opinion on the internet or wherever. What is not okay is mindlessly hating, and even worse - using false facts to support said opinion.
I have seen some people using the argument that it is one of Marvel's worst selling comics. Which has already been proven wrong by multiple sites, including Comichron, just Google it, as I did myself. I read multiple posts, ones saying how good Jane is doing as Thor in sales, others disproving this, so I checked for myself the numbers at the site mentioned above month by month to be sure. The comic truly had its downfalls as the story progressed but in my opinion it's normal for the 1st issue to have more sales than the 21st. If we compare it to Unworthy Thor, which started running a bit later and followed the now unworthy Odinson, the data shows the latter had more sales. But then again, while Might Thor was at its 17th issue, Unworthy Thor was at its 2nd. Also, they later crossed paths, shared comic issues, it's fair to say they go hand in hand and Jason Aaron, the author, probably doesn't want us to compare them, as they complete and compliment each other's stories. Still I decided to check the comic that made Thor unworthy in the first place - Thor: God of Thunder (2012 - 2014), which seemed to me more "comparable" to Might Thor (2015 - 2018). *I keep putting the years it was being released so as to not be confused with previous Mighty Thor issues, whole Odinson was still Thor, please bear with me* So yes, the numbers were pretty close, but from what I saw, Mighty Thor had the upper hand if we compare first issue to first issue and so on. (In defense of Odinson, we have to take into account that this data is only from the US and does not include digital sales. Also, he's been around since the 50s. We could argue Jane was a breath of fresh air that some Marvel fans were indeed ready for. As a non-American, and also a person without a hint of knowledge in economics I cannot take into account inflation and whatever else has prevented or enabled Americans to get their hands on the comics or has affected prizes through the years. Bear that in mind.) Moreover, from what I saw on Comichron, both comics had much competition - God of thunder was released along with Avengers vs the X-men, the Uncanny X-men, pretty popular at the time, and the Goddess of Thunder faced Civil War 2 and DC Universe Rebirth (yes, DC is in the game too), also dominating with tremendous sales for the longest time. Yet I stick with my original statement - both Thors are valid and shouldn't be put against one another regardless of profit. Because at the end of the day what will matter the most is the story. And boy, what a story it is.
Now, I haven't read the Thor: God of Thunder, but as I was doing research I found one very well written summary and explanation of Thor's arc and his becoming unworthy and I will post a link below, because I honestly feel I wouldn't be doing this comic a favor by describing it without having read it. Which I plan to do in the future, tbh. It's a fantastic prelude to the Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018) that I've come to love. First, I'd like to ask you all to stop hating on the comic without having read it first. It doesn't make any sense and being petty for the sake of being petty won't benefit neither you, nor anyone, really. Now, about the comic itself - the art is magnificent. It's just gorgeous. Mighty Thor isn't , thank all the gods, sexualized, she is pretty buffed and generally looks like a warrior. As it is with the other characters, I dare say. The background truly captures the essence of every world Jane finds herself on. Action scenes are just the right amount and balanced with dialogue well. On a side note, it's pretty funny to read/listen to in your head the Shakespearean English cursive in which Jane talks as Thor. The plot line branches beyond this comic, starting from Thor: God of Thunder and leading to the War of Realms. And it is elaborately built in every issue. You don't know what to expect, yet it makes sense when it happens. Which leads me to the characterizations. My God, what a treat Loki is in this. Clearly, my opinion is kinda biased, since he's my favorite character, but you never know which side he's on. What his motivations are. And it just feels so... Loki. His writing is brilliant. Almost makes me forget what the MCU did to him. Also, he gets some daddy time with Laufey (not as kinky as I make it sound). Frigga/Freyja is just as awesome as in the MCU, even more, at least in the comics she calls Odin out on his shit, who btw is I guess an asshole in every version and universe. Malekith, the main villain, is unbearably despicable, I want to tear every page he is on. He really was mishandled in the Dark World, if you want some true action with the dark elves, you are welcome to enjoy. I saved the best for the end - Jane Foster/ Might Thor. Now, if you think Dr. Foster spends her time boasting about her worthiness and how Odinson is just called Thor, but she is Mighty Thor, you are horribly wrong. She just... does her job. Because the hammer chose her. Because there's no one else to do so. That's it. If you think there's some feminism involved, yes, there sure is, but it certainly isn't the reason Jane became Thor in the first place. It was not the creators going SJW because it's trendy, as such a mindset is honestly offensive to any descent creator with any self respect, but a well thought out story arc, which, I repeat, you have to read the comic to understand. Jane is not at all whiny about the hate she gets in-universe, not only from foes like Odin and who-not, but from Shield and generally people whose asses she's saving. Her having cancer is not something they pulled to provoke sympathy and make her look like a victim - on the contrary, she is a damn hero and a victor. I don't want to give out spoilers, but her being Thor is actually a giant sacrifice that no one really appreciates (both in-universe and in the fandom). She is not Thor to prove she can be, or just to prove "women can be heroes" - she doesn't have to. She is simply needed by the realms and so she does her job, even though she is called a thief, persecuted and generally hated. All that matters is that the hammer finds her worthy - the beauty and simplicity of that fact you will find out, for the last time, if you read the comic.
I'm not making you read the comic or watch Thor: Love and Thunder. I myself don't know what to make of this film yet because there's barely any information about it. I only know it will be based on the comic so that's a reason for my hopes to be up already. On the other hand, since I didn't like Loki's characterization in Ragnarok, I'm not sure what to expect from Taika. There are valid reasons to not like the idea of Jane returning to the MCU as Thor, which you are entitled to. However, reasons such as "why does everything have to be political these days" are not. Because if I had to make a list of everything politically related in the MCU, it would take forever. Steve Rogers kills nazis is the most blatant example. Make of it what you want. But I think we're far enough into the 21st century to realize art and real life are not that separable. It's undeniable that art affects people and that is to say, people everywhere. And they all have different opinions and aren't gonna like everything media is offering to them. And I wish I could simply tell you not to watch the movie but I'm a Marvel fan too and I understand that I can't just take away Thor from you because I want Mighty Thor as well. But none of us can stop Marvel from producing it. So, to quote an image I saw recently, I don't know how to explain to you that you should care about other people. Let the rest of the fandom enjoy what they want to enjoy. Yes, ik I can play around with the tags and avoid posts that unnerve me but, for example, I'm looking up Mighty Thor fanart, which obviously isn't anti-Mighty Thor, yet I get attacked in the comics for anticipating a movie that doesn't even have a full cast yet. Ik I'm not asking for too much when I wish to get the same internet experience (not only tumblr, but also insta, YouTube, Twitter, any site) as the Thor Odison fans, for example. I'm aware I cannot stop all the toxic fans and the trolls but I hope this post has inspired those of you who simply can't envision Jane as Thor, or don't like Natalie Portman in the role, or whatever eles personal preference that doesn't involve political issues and isn't harmful to the community, not to attack every post on your dash with hate. The movie is called LOVE and Thunder, for God's sake. (on a side note, is a franchise that is too afraid to show LGBT characters for more than 1 minute so as to not lose profit from China, THAT politically correct)
Anyway, that was a veeeery long rant, sorry to whoever reads this but, like, please, I put effort into this, hoping this time around I won't be the only positive reviewer of a movie, like I was with Solo: a Star Wars story (yes, I'm still bitter about this), which was boycotted for no apparent reason but was a decent film in reality, and I'm only bringing it up because it has a similar experience to Love and Thunder for getting hate before even being released. I'm not defending a billion dollar company that flopped in box office once, I'm defending the viewer's right to media they are interested in. If you don't like the character, remember - that's your opinion, not a fact that the character sucks. Kudos.
Not very easy to navigate, I advice you to do the research month by month individually for comics you'd like to compare. Also, if you happen to find more reliable data, pls say so in the comments.
Here you have the summary and explanation of the greatness of Thor: God of Thunder, Jesus, I'll go bankrupt if I buy this one too.
youtube
Yes, I want to end the sales dispute once and for all, I'm tired of seeing it on my dash. This guy probably explains it better than I did.
@awesomejenlawrence you said you'd like to read this and I delivered
#natalie portman#mighty thor#marvel#mcu#mcu phase 4#jane foster#thor odinson#loki#taika waititi#chris hemsworth#thor love and thunder#thor god of thunder#jason aaron#my thoughts#my rants#positivemindset#lovewins
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Another stupid long post about how I don't know my own fucking gender
This is honestly just copied and pasted from a yt comment I made on an older vid and I figured I'd share it here bc tumblr loves this shit I guess lol. God damn I've been questioning my gender for so long and ik rn im prob not still in the best position to be thinking about deep life shit like where I am mentally and im dealing with a lot in my life and also very insecure about potentially being trans bc a lot of my friends don't seem like they would be very accepting and my bf is only really into girls. I asked him how he would feel if I was nonbinary or looked like a boy and he just said he wasn't totally sure but he's only attracted to girls :c he's the sweetest bf in existence and im honestly so afraid of losing him, so aside from obviously not wanting to deal with all the other trans shit, I definitely hope im not trans bc I don't wanna lose him. Anyways, ill start with my childhood I guess. I was always super tomboyish. My older sisters (im the youngest sibling btw) were always p tomboyish so maybe I kinda got it from them but I kinda felt like I was more tomboyish than them? I felt like I was the most boyish girl I knew, like even meeting other tomboy girls in elementary school I felt like I couldn't really relate to them or like they couldnt relate to me enough idk. I also remember once making up a song about being like so tomboyish that I was basically a boy or something along those lines and sang it to my best friend at the time who I copied like all the fkin time (it honestly wasnt healthy lmao I didn't have good parents, also I think I started making up songs bc she did that and I wanted to like impress her), but she thought it was stupid and weird so I just forgot about it and moved on. I was embarrassed to even enjoy playing with dolls or play dress up games online and was determined to play masculine games like runescape (even tho I ended up doing girly shit in runescape anyways lmao) and considered myself one of the guys. In 5th grade when I started needing to wear a bra I absolutely didn't want to, tho some girls in my class thought it was weird I didn't wear a bra when they found out and that made me more insecure about it, but since then I've p much only worn sports bras. I have bought some more normal bras bc I wanted to look attractive in them for my SO or whatever but I still highly prefer my sports bras and can't stand wearing the other ones unless I have to bc my sports bras aren't clean lmfao. I always hated talking about genitalia and breasts n shit but that could just be bc of how I was raised and how my family was always so strict and such radical Christians and anything sex related was a sin, idk if its dysphoria or not. I've never rlly liked my chest and hated showing cleavage like so god damn much and still do but maybe that's the same thing or maybe I just want smaller boobs and that's it idk??? Like I'd want to appear to have a completely flat chest at least, idk if I'd want to actually like have a guy chest or not? Also huge issue with ppl seeing me naked or touching my boobs but again idk if that's gender related or just a normal issue I have. Tho I had a friend in high school (a girl, a very weird lewd girl) who would occasionally grope my chest randomly and it wasn't a huge issue but kinda made me uncomfortable and more aware of my chest. I really like when I wear big hoodies or when I lean over so my shirt kinda poofs out and it looks like I have a flat chest underneath. Though im not super uncomfortable with my boobs, like normally ill want nothing to do with them but I don't mind my SO touching them especially if they're really into it. I wouldn't say im rlly dysphoric about between my legs either, like yeah I think its weird and I hate monthlies and stuff but I think that's normal. I think if i woke up one day and had a dick I would be fine with it, I'd prob even enjoy it tbh lmao. I once had a dream that i was, well, a male dog like,,, ya know, with a female dog, and not to sound weird af (hey we were both dogs ok) but I think i kinda enjoyed it? I don't really remember any other dreams where I remember actually having a dick or feeling it but I've had several dreams as a male person, but p much all of them were like, I was seeing through a character's eyes or smth, not really that I was a guy, so idk if that's normal. I have the same dreams about being other girl characters, I'd say its split about 50/50. Because of this game community im in, a lot of ppl assume im a guy, and a lot of people still think im a guy and I haven't really bothered to correct them but idk if I find it more enjoyable bc its funny or if I enjoy not being referred to as female for once. I'll admit I feel most comfortable referred to as they/them, like without a doubt, if I could go by only 1 set of pronouns for the rest of my life it would be they/them. But ik that's not enough to call myself trans. I definitely wouldn't want to be 100% male. Like if I imagine myself as a grown man vs a grown woman id prob choose to be a woman. I don't like my voice but I think that's mostly just bc I sound 10 years younger than I actually am, and wouldn't really want a deep/masculine voice. Like a "tomboy" voice would be fine if that makes sense? I don't want facial hair or want to have a masculine body, I like that I have curves and soft skin and small hands. Personally I like my hair long bc its soft and people love it, but sometimes I kinda wish I had short hair and could pass as a boy. Like I'd wanna be a typical cute kpop boy ngl lmfao. I like the whole cute androgynous/feminine boy look and wish I could pull it off. Tho I also like really girly things sometimes and am okay being seen as a girl, i just want to be cute and attractive. Ik whether im trans or not I like being a mix of feminine and masculine, tho I admit in the past I've been kinda insecure bc I used to be super sure I was nb and thought me liking girly things and wanting to still havd long hair and wear girly clothes made me seem like "not trans enough" or whatever. But i guess here I am questioning myself again anyways. If I am nb, it sucks that ill never really be able to be openly myself and all but I've accepted by now that I kinda have to pick a binary and choose what I want to be seen as for the rest of my life, and im ok with being female. There are some things I dont like about my body whether they're really gender related or not but I can't afford to transition and wouldn't like most of the effects of T and am afraid of surgery and not sure I want top surgery enough to ever get it anyways, but I think if we lived in a perfect world and I could magically change my body at will and I wasnt afraid of judgment or being unattractive or whatever, I'd probably want to look androgynous and itd be cool to be able to change my genitalia at will lmao. If I had to choose 1 genitalia over the over I honestly have no idea what I'd choose but I have no desire to ever get bottom surgery, at the same time tho I honestly wanna someday get surgery or w/e to never be able to get pregnant. I just could not handle pregnancy or giving birth and I don't even like babies and breast feeding sounds awful so if I ever have kids they will be adopted 100% and most likely be older and like not newborn babies lmfao, babies are honestly so weird to me and they stink and cry and they're so fragile and im so afraid of like dropping them when I hold them lmao. But I like my nieces and nephews and I like being the cool aunt (is there a gender neutral version of aunt/uncle?) who lets them use my art supplies and helps them do fun stuff even if I get tired of them sometimes lol. Idk if that's gender related either but yeah I guess. This if kind of a more recent thing but I often say I'd make a great bf kinda as a joke bc of how I am in relationships like being the stereotypical sweet bf type who makes things for their partner a lot and wants to be their knight in shining armor and their protector and all that, but again prob not rlly trans related lmao just thought I'd throw that out there I guess. So when I was 17 was when I really started getting into trans stuff, prior to that I mostly just learned from my parents that trans ppl were "against god" and all that bs, and eventually started realizing lgbt+ isn't as bad as my family said and later realized I was bi. But anyways I met an agender person online when i was 17ish and I'd never heard it before and thought it was really interesting and asked them how you know you're agender bc after hearing their explanation of it i thought it described how I felt, but ofc they weren't transmed and just described it as being like a deep feeling or whatever and since then i started calling myself agender (and switched between a few labels but basically nonbinary) until my transmed friend told me I was ridiculous and that I wasn't trans, and honestly he was a huge dick but im a huge pushover lmao and I thought well he's trans so he must know what he's talking about, and though I felt discouraged about it I stopped calling myself nonbinary. Then I began questioning it again after not too long and basically since then I've been questioning my gender off and on. I'm now 22 and god I fucking hope im cis but also I feel like a part of me doesn't want to be cis if that makes sense?? Idk if that's because I don't like being a girl for some weird deep reason I don't know about despite being pretty sure I've gotten a lot of my feelings and their reasons behind them figured out, or if it's because I am trans and dont want to force myself to pretend im a girl 100% forever. At the very least, whatever the fuck my gender is, I want to continue going by they\them wherever I can and pretending to be a boy to strangers online and I'd love to cosplay male characters and bind and occasionally just dress masculine for the hell of it and probably wear sports bras for the rest of my life. I feel like in a way I cang possibly be trans because I can live with all of those things and be fairly comfortable still being seen as female for the rest of my life. But idk, I have bpd and other mental shit so sometimes im not great with my feelings (tho I do try really hard to identify all of my feelings/emotions and stuff) but at the same time bpd can cause weird identity shit so maybe its just a weird mix of a bunch of crap and im not actually trans but just weird and tomboyish enough to question my gender for 5 years and still be unsure. Also I know a lot of ppl suggest talking to a therapist/psychologist/whatever professional and trust me I would love to but I can't currently and am unsure when ill be able to bc they're expensive and I live in the middle of fucking nowhere so finding a decent therapist around where I live rn is going to be very difficult. Also, I have fucking crippling social anxiety lmao like I'd be so afraid to open up about this stuff even to a professional. So if anyone could suggest anything online that could help that would be amazing
#Trans#nonbinary#nb#genderqueer#gender questioning#transmed#pls help me lmao I hate my brain sm#also im so sorry if this post is scuffed af#im on mobile#its 4 am I cba
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