#i don't know why it makes me laugh

[likeafairytale]

"I actually get that you want to protect your sister's softness. I do. Lyra is a lot like her. She used to crawl into my bed when she had a nightmare - if anyone noticed her she would've been exiled by now. We're trained to be ruthless, the ones that aren't are sent back to their other parent. Which is why I always insisted on being honest about all the cruelties of the world. She insists on staying soft, but I do my best for her not to be weak and blind. That's how you protect the people you love in this world. Otherwise, they'll get badly hurt. Or worse." - Aeron to Malachai

❛Are you judging my way to deal with my sister?❜

❛Maybe a little.❜

Even though Malachai did not like being judged, he couldn't help but chuckled a little to his last words, especially when he showed a little space between his thumb and forefinger to show his point. Although the merman didn't expect it, he ended up by quite tolerating –would he dare say liking?– his brother-in-law. He wouldn't have believed it sooner, but Aeron quite understood what it was to be a prince with so much responsibility, since it was quite obvious that he was his mother's favorite, just like Malachai himself was his father's favorite. It was easy to talk about those problems with him, even though he didn't want to admit it, he tried to pretend he did it unwillingly, but people could see that the merman appreciated the fae, and vice versa, which caused some argument between Malachai and Nathaniel most of the time –the poor siren thought his brother was replacing him, which was completely wrong, but Malachai didn't understand the fear.

Malachai wanted to go for a swim, alone, and as an annoying little brother –now Malachai could actually understand Nathaniel's fear– Aeron started to follow him, probably because he'd rather be with the crown prince of the oceans than with his own brother, which the merman understood, the fae's family was terrible in any sense of the word. At first, Malachai ignored him, like he often did, but like often, Aeron, who hated silence, started to ramble about everything, and the subject of their little sisters came into the discussion.

As stated previously, Malachai did not like being judged, even more when it was about his siblings; since his mother's death, he was the one who had to deal with them, and so raised them because most of the maids and servants were too scared of Triton to discipline them all the way it should. But the problem was that Malachai himself was a teenager, sort of, at the time, and having to be a parent when you had no experience in the matter was difficult, especially when you're expected to train in combat and politics most of the time. He knew he did wrong towards his siblings, especially Calypso, who was still a child of Lyra's age when their mother died, but he hated to admit he failed his siblings.

❛Some people need tough love to understand things. I think your sister requires it.❜ Aeron advised which was very wise of him; anyone would think it was out of character for him to say such a thing, but Malachai knew by now that the fae was actually a wise man, he was just hiding it very well.

❛I know she does.❜ He admitted while sighing. ❛Trust me, I try my best, but each time I do, she shut-downs and refuses to talk until I apologize. I know I should have done it way sooner, but try to raise five children by yourself when you are just as lost as them.❜

Once again, Malachai sighed, coming closer to the shore, and so to the fae. He stayed in the water, for it was refreshing, and he always loved being a merman better than being a human –but who wouldn't? Looking in the distance, Malachai was lost in his mind, asking himself if he should explain better why he was so protective and loving with Calypso, or if this should stay a family business, but once again, Aeron was his brother-in-law, and therefore, even though it was hard to admit, he was family too.

❛She almost died, did you know that?❜ He suddenly asked which visibly was something the fae did not know and wasn't expected to hear.

❛We don't really talk that much.❜

❛She was born prematurely, and almost died. Ironically, she couldn't breathe underwater at first, mother was so scared, father was unbothered. She had to be brought to the surface. Father told me I shouldn't bother to know her name because she was dying anyway. He didn't want to see her, for at least six months. Saying, 'where is the point of knowing her? She's weak, I don't need a weak child.' But then, she got stronger. That's when she started to be interesting to him. In his eyes she had no chance to survive, so seeing her getting strong was... fascinating, I suppose. He liked her, or pretended to, I'm not quite sure with him. Made her the Realm's delight, which became stronger after she received her power. Everyone loved her, the people, the maids, all of us. She was a little miracle. Because she had such a weak upbringing, no one dared being too harsh with her, except Father, maybe. Oh, one maid tried, she got fired by father, and it became an example. After that, she was allowed to do what she pleased, no repercussion, although sometimes she got some from father. All of that to say; this is why she is so... soft and blind to the world's misery. We sheltered her too much.❜

It was clear, at Malachai's look, that these memories weren't the most pleasant he had. And maybe he shouldn't have told them in the first place, especially to Aeron, for it was an intimate matter between the Blackwater family, but a part of him thought that his brother-in-law should know why his wife was so sweet, and soft, and, at time, borderline bratty and selfish. Because she was never told 'no' before. Of course, Malachai did not know all his sister's life story, even though he thought so, he did not know yet about his father's dagger, and how Triton loved to stab his youngest daughter, and this was the reason she was out for days in a row.

❛That's... sad. You all let her get away with her behavior just to spare her feelings. Now look at what she is. Even my little sister has a better knowledge of the world than her.❜ Aeron started while struggling, visibly unbothered by what he just heard, or maybe he did not process all the words yet, Malachai did not know which version he'd rather believe, and the merman prince sighed and rolled his eyes. ❛You smother her too much. Like I said, she'll probably get badly hurt or worse. And that'll be on you.❜

❛She is already married to you, what worse could happen to her?❜ Malachai said with amusement which made Aeron rolled his eyes. ❛But you're right... That's why you're her husband. You tell her the honest truth, and I still stay the good guy, and I got to punch you sometimes. Everyone wins.❜

❛What am I winning in this deal?❜

❛You can be as honest and mean to her as you wish. Should be enough.❜

On those words, Malachai splashed Aeron with his tail, before going back for a swim, letting the fae prince all wet in the shore.

[starcurtain]

Following Topaz's explanation that Cornerstones are made to fill the hole in the user's heart, what "hole" in Aven's heart do you think his drag queen powers are meant to fill? Especially since Topaz remarks he's the only one with such showy powers

Still trying to catch up with all the messages in the inbox; sorry to everyone for taking a million years to respond.

So cunty, and for what???

Anyway, first, when Jade talks about the Stonehearts' "voids," the alternate reading above that word is actually "ambition." And she mentions that the reason she risked reaching out to Firefly is that she views herself as similar to Firefly--Jade is someone with an unfulfilled wish.

I think there's enough here to suggest that the Stonehearts' voids are not quite what we would normally think of when hearing the word "void"--rather than being best understood as something removed or something lost, their voids seem to be "something desired." An unfulfilled goal. An unmet need. A burning ambition. A secret wish. They all have somewhere they want to get to, and they've signed on-board with Diamond's Preservation project because his power is the fastest way--maybe the only way--to get there.

The implication here, by the way, is that the Stonehearts are acting out the very act of Preservation itself with Diamond. The goal of Qlipoth is for the universe to be saved, an unshakeable resolution to stop Destruction's wanton obliteration. Thus, Preservation itself can be understood as "A desire that must be continuously protected and relentlessly pursued." To live. To endure.

In using the power of an emanator to protect and provide the Stonehearts with ways to pursue their own desires, we replicate in miniature the exact resolve and endless pursuit of perseverance that Qlipoth is acting out in the broader universe. The will of Preservation empowers the Stonehearts--and in turn, the Stonehearts swear an oath to aid in Preservation's mission. It's a mutually beneficial arrangement, and it also simultaneously imitates Jade's shop perfectly: I'll give you exactly what you want, if you give me what I need.

I should clarify that I don't actually think the cornerstones themselves fill the Stonehearts' voids. Rather, they seem to me to be a tangible symbol of the oath between Diamond and the Stonehearts--"I'll give you this power to fulfill your deepest wish, if you work for me." Jade suggests that the power of the cornerstones provides Stonehearts with the means to fill their voids (I.e., having superpowers makes it possible for you to pursue your wish), so I think their individual cornerstone abilities are best understood as "The exact power I need to achieve my particular goal."

So what does that say about Aventurine's "showy" transformation?

Pretty much all the rest of this is just going to be my personal speculation, but I'd say the most telling glimpse we get into why Aventurine's power is so "visual" comes from these lines with the future "Aventurine" in 2.1:

There's two completely contradictory desires being expressed here: Aventurine's life "is the chip he's most eager to lay down" and "always has been"--that is, he genuinely wants to die. He isn't just willing to gamble with his life, he's eager to. The future "Aventurine" also says real Aventurine wants to be "polished up" (to be controlled and molded by others) and "cuffed with red-hot chains" (to be made powerless and not responsible for making his own decisions, to be punished).

But conversely, the real Aventurine also wants to be perceived as "a smooth operator" and "the solid gold deal-maker who doesn't waste a drop of sweat." He wants to be in charge of his image. He wants to be the one who controls the narrative and defines how others think of him. He wants to be "spotlit center stage"--to command the eyes of the world. In short, we could say that Aventurine wants his death (and conversely, his life) to mean something.

From these conflicting desires, I think you can derive a few totally opposite but equally valid interpretations of why Aventurine's cornerstone power is so "visual":

A combat-oriented transformation is another means to seek death.

Jade's power is scary, but she isn't using it to literally launch herself into fights. Topaz's seems to be similar--something that might allow her to win over her opponents in some way (she was about to use it in Belobog to no-sell the Trailblazer), but she clarifies directly that it is not a "transformation." Aventurine just literally turns into a boss enemy and goes straight out on to the battlefield.

In the fight, he doesn't even use shields. (Now whether that's something he never does because the cornerstone powers don't actually come with shields while in his monster form, if he couldn't use shields because his cornerstone was broken, or if he just chose not to use shields in this fight to give Trailblazer and Co. a fighting chance, only time will tell. However, it might be worth noting that his empowered Apocalyptic Shadow form doesn't come with shields either, despite having other new mechanics.)

The point is, this form, while looking cool and seeming strong, is actually a gamble in and of itself. To go out onto the battlefield, where you might not actually be the strongest combatant, is always a risk. And I think this is the kind of risk that Aventurine manifests continually in his life. He is constantly creating opportunities for his own luck to fail. His unfulfilled desire, the "ambition" he was desperate enough to join the Stonehearts to pursue--as his original goal to save his people is completely gone, his only current goal might actually just be a chance to die. His powers may manifest as a combat-oriented transformation because that is just one more way to throw himself into the crossfire.

In fact, this is exactly what Sugilite accuses him of in Jade's myriad celestia:

You didn't need to snatch his wig this hard, Sugilite. (Also I need you all to know I originally wrote "You didn't need to come for him this hard, Sugilite," but then I realized how unfortunate that wording was, so...)

You could even argue that the fact Aventurine's transformation comes with a mask that obscures his entire face is a sign that we're supposed to see this form as dehumanizing.

The facial features are completely obscured and asymmetrical, there's no mouth, his fingers have become claws--despite his body staying mostly human-shaped, it's obviously intended to hint at something monstrous, subsuming his original identity behind a violent facade.

Kakavasha disappears entirely behind "Aventurine" when he transforms, becoming a faceless enemy at the risk of (perhaps in hopes of) entirely losing himself. Maybe every transformation lets Aventurine throw himself closer and closer to the edge of death--and perhaps, before Penacony, only death could ever have filled the "void."

But, on the complete opposite hand (because Aventurine is always both sides of the coin), we could also argue the other end of the spectrum entirely:

A combat-oriented transformation is a show of force.

This screencap brought to you by Mr. Rubhen925 of Youtube.

Aventurine's entire life has been marred by disenfranchisement, by violations of his basic human rights, freedoms, and agency. At every turn, he has been victimized by others more powerful than himself: his childhood consisted of his clan being relentlessly hounded and hunted to extinction by the Katicans, having their food constantly stolen, their meager belongings burned to the ground, and each one of his family members systematically slaughtered, often in front of his eyes.

After his childhood, he was bought and sold as chattel for pennies, branded like an animal, and forced into a fight where to he had to beat other innocent people to death just to keep himself alive, all for the entertainment of the masses. Even Jade, who promised to help him achieve his goals, treats him like a business investment more than a friend.

In Penacony, we watch everyone he talks to degrade and ostracize him. Even though Aventurine led him into doing it, Sunday tortures and re-traumatizes him live for our entertainment.

Even more that, we see Aventurine constantly struggling with the question of whether his life is really his own or whether his blessing from Gaiathra means that his entire existence has been predetermined, his fate sealed in blood and sand from the very moment of his birth, utterly inescapable.

No matter how Aventurine tries to portray himself as the ultimate winner, he's only ever the "final" victor--being the only one left standing at the end is meaningless if on the road to getting there, you were treated like fate's favorite punching bag. Winning in the end is utterly pointless if on the road to winning, you still lost it all first, from the things you loved to your personal freedom.

What does a person who has been made powerless again and again truly desire? What void do you seek to fill if life has denied you your agency over and over?

Power. Dominance. The ability to literally strike back at those who've wronged you. The strength to intimidate and force people into a corner the way you've been intimidated and forced before.

If we say that Aventurine's "void" is not a literal desire for the release of death, then it might make sense for the "void" to instead to be a frantic desire to gain control over his circumstances. To be the one finally in charge of deciding his own fate.

Particularly in light of his character story which tells us that Kakavasha's original goal for joining the Stonehearts was to save his people, the desire to take on an impressive form that screams "I'm powerful" and has the ability to physically enact vengeance on others feels directly aligned. And it remains aligned even after the reveal that the Avgins are all gone--once more fate strips Kakavasha of his power to make a difference in the world, to achieve what he truly dreams of.

The Apocalyptic Shadow version of his boss fight is called "Desperate Diceroller."

How angry he must be, deep down. How hateful the world must seem. How sad it is to feel that way.

If destiny won't let you out of the cage, your only choice is to grow claws to tear it open.

Okay, but WHY so much swag though?

Are the peacock feathers and spandex really necessary?

Listen. Everyone talks about Ratio having "gifted kid" syndrome, but I'm here to tell you that Aventurine is actually a burnt out gifted kid extraordinaire.

He's literally, canonically, explicitly the chosen one of his people.

From the moment of his birth, his mother and sister--and presumably others in his clan even--were telling him that he was their clan's most precious treasure and that he would lead them to prosperity and safety.

He carried this weight even after fleeing from the massacre, all through his childhood and teenage years, through slavery and abuse, putting his very life on the line to join the IPC in hopes of finally fulfilling the destiny his mother and sister promised he could.

He was supposed to save them. That was his meaning. That was his purpose in life.

But he was too late.

The fate he was born for, raised believing, and risked everything to achieve... is still incomplete.

So, for all that talk about suicide and power-seeking, my real answer is this: Aventurine's "void" is his unfulfilled destiny.

His whole existence has been predetermined, his life's journey laid out in prophecy and blessings from the very beginning. Yet what he thought was his fate betrayed him, and where you head after becoming an unsuccessful chosen one is a question without answer.

His thoughts constantly circle around how he is a "failure" and a "loser."

When you have no sense of purpose, when your life has no meaning, when what you are still seeking is the role you were supposed to have from the moment of your birth: the glorious destiny of being a savior, being the "happiness" of your people, being the hero...

Of course you crave the spectacle. Of course you long for the spotlight--you long to be recognized. Because Kakavasha's the chosen one. "Spotlit center stage" is where he's supposed to be--in the leading role that was stolen from him.

I think that Aventurine's cornerstone transformation is so flashy because, at the core, it represents a longing to truly be the "precious wealth" of the Avgin that his sister promised him he would be. It represents his desire to transform from a useless, "discarded" person into a larger-than-life version of himself. (Hey, fun fact, out of every official depiction of Aventurine, his boss model wears the only outfit in which his slave brand is not naturally visible.) He literally transforms into a supernatural being, capable of seizing others' fates in his hands. It represents the power he needed to save his people and himself. Its extreme flashiness screams for attention, demands to be witnessed as something beyond a helpless human.

It's almost as if Aventurine is a child writing a wish-fulfillment story where he transforms into a hyper-glamorous, all-powerful masked superhero who is capable of saving the day and winning against his enemies every time.

Unlike Jade and Topaz, Aventurine can't hide his deepest desire. It was always going to be a "transformation," because Aventurine's unanswered wish is to be someone better than himself.

His "void," his deepest unachieved ambition--it's written right there, all over his body.

Aventurine's cornerstone power is a story he's telling himself about the person he was supposed to be.

But as Acheron claims, that's life itself.

Aventurine doesn't feel like he has any control over his journey's ultimate destination.

He doesn't know where's he's headed or what the purpose of it all is. But...

Jade explicitly describes the Ten Stonehearts and Diamond's endeavor as a "journey" as well:

Because Preservation represents the continuance of life itself, and the Stonehearts with their endless "voids"--Aventurine with his soul-deep longing to become someone better than himself--represent all of us very real human beings, trying our best to find our own "cornerstones," to gain the means to finally, finally achieve our own sweet dreams.

[peacethroughpassionyt]

"I was a lone Megatron in a sea of Whirls."

–Rodimus, Issue 22 of MTMTE

[crimsonlovebartylus]

wolfstar & bartylus on date:

Sirius: so what are YOUR intentions with my brother.

Barty: no. what are YOUR intentions with mine.

Remus:

Regulus:

Remus: what? no? i'm an only child

Barty: *whisper hisses* not anymore, you're my brother now. *turns to sirius and points* now, speak black

Sirius: well uh.. well.. my intentions are to.. be with him forever.. uh.. *blinks*

Regulus: I swear to god.

[necrotic-nephilim]

I am always thinking TimJay thoughts related to the fact that they have matching scars from getting their throats slit, and not only that, but Jason slit Tim's throat first in an attempt to threaten Bruce, where Tim was nothing more than a pawn for Jason to use to emotionally manipulate Bruce.

batman (1940) #618

And then, just a little while later when Jason is trying to confront Bruce and do his whole dramatic moment with Joker in UTRH, and Bruce slits Jason's throat to stop Jason from killing the Joker.

batman (1940) #650

It makes me so Unwell. They have literal matching scars. When do you think Jason realizes it? When do you think, while running his fingers over the scar he has to always remind himself that Bruce was willing to jeopardize Jason's own life just to save the Joker, Jason realized it was the same scar *he* gave Tim? And does it click for him too, that he and Tim are a lot alike? Being used as pawns in Bruce's game? And for the first time he maybe understands Tim Drake, just another kid trying to get Bruce's attention and approval? And Jason did to Tim exactly what Bruce did to Jason? And that's part of what spurns on Jason's obsession with Tim, trying to "save" Tim from Bruce's ideology?

When they finally get together does it make Jason even more possessive? He put that mark on Tim and now he has his own to match. It's the closest to being understood and loved he's ever felt when Tim runs his fingers over Jason's scar at the same time Jason touches Tim's. Mirrors of each other, in a fun, fucked up little way.

[makorragal-312]

Not Natalia being interested in Buck because of his DEATH...

But then immediately losing interest because he assisted in creating LIFE.

I’M DEAD XD

[youchangedmedestiel]

I know it's fun and all that everybody is talking about Destiel.

And I'm like the first one reblogging many of those here. Balls deep Destiel and everything. Because like I said it's fun, and it's acknowledged while it wasn't the case AT ALL before.

But I have this feeling that they don't really talk about the love between Dean and Cas. The thing is I'm not shipping them because they are just two hot guys that I want to see make out on my screen.

I ship them because of the way they love each other. And I don't want them to believe that we just think of them as being two hot guys that needs to make out, because through the jokes it's what I'm getting. Really hope I'm wrong.

[goodpokeaniscreencaps]

[purpurussy]

the dragon city breeding phan crackfic nobody 1 person (kinda) asked for (blame @bewareofthenewphannie for putting this idea in my head) is here!

Flame Susan's Sunrise

^ click for: fem top flame susan, mpreg oviposition, smoke tentacles, dan in the cuck chair and the ruthless consistency of capita£ester

ty @absolutefilthimsosorry @slitsfordan @steveandscraggy for giving feedback on this nonsense <3

[fisheito]

*rings the service bell* hi um i was wondering.. if there's any yakumo temperature play in here? sounds silly but i only realised after i circled the building a few times... that i haven't seen it at all. Seems to be common practice, actually- to not have it. i've visited several other buildings and there's been no sight of it.

which is... strange? if i think about it, it's surprising that i haven't encountered it yet! it sort of makes sense to have them together, you know? considering that temperature is so vital to a snake's perception of the world. and how sensitive reptiles are to temperature fluctuations.

so there's a lot of control to be had here. can you imagine controlling someone's energy level just by adjusting the thermostat? er- well, i guess we already do that. but imagine you put yakumo in an ice bath and he immediately falls asleep. brumation happens instantly now, sorry. and the only way to snap him out of it is to stick a flaming dildo up his ass

what?. no, i mean, restore his regular energy level with a soft warm-up. a heated blanket and a gentle steam. hahaha.

people plunge themselves into ice water before jumping into hot tubs and vice versa- for fun! they do this recreationally!! they call it a "spa treatment" and pay a premium for it! what's wrong with giving yakumo a spa treatment? who are we to deprive him of such sensory luxury?

i'm JUST SAYING that since he naturally gravitates toward heat, you could put him in a hurt AND comfort scenario he could be naked and cold, banished to the distant corner of the room.. but when you offer him a source of warmth, whether that be a hot rock or a warm hand or 20 lit candles suspended above him dripping wax on him at random intervals,,, wouldn't he have a tough time turning down your generosity?

i mean, he certainly would if he was tied up.

see, here's the other thing i cannot quite comprehend-- it's that--- how has a snake yokai not featured bondage scenes yet? i guess there was that one time with the.. hm. no, we shan't talk about the cellar. besides, ONLY ONE TIME is unacceptable for a sentient rope!! although yakumo would love to wrap up his prey and squeeze the cum out of em, i feel like we're missing out on a lot by not OutSnaking the Snake. tie up and restrain the Restrainer. it's just a liiiiittle step farther than putting him in a pillowcase! so mild!!!!

here's a guy who is always worried about losing control/// about being free to wreak havoc on his loved ones, despite his best intentions. so how about we give him a moment of peace? a moment where he believes he's subdued and unable to cause harm? just tie him up! keep him under TIGHT lock and key. (or some nice soft cloths for his sensitive skin, if we're being nice.) honestly, his brain will do the rest of the work. even if he's not truly incapacitated, his desire to BE So can fill the gaps in any questionable knotwork.

while he's half in the prison of his mind and half in the confines you've created for him, take some time to squeeze some whimpers out of him. although it pains me to cover up those soggy eyes, a blindfold may be an intriguing option. is yakumo the type of snake to rely on heat vision? WHY NOT FIND OUT! (if he's not terrified at his loss of sight, then i guess his pit organs are functioning . in which case, the blindfold doesn't really need to stay on. if he IS terrified and feels the loss of visuals acutely, this would be an excellent opportunity to soak in his panic. just for a bit though. we're not so cruel. guide him back with a warm touch. see? playing with fire temperature contrasts can bring such relief!)

maybe i'm getting ahead of myself. i don't expect yakumo temperature play to show up WITH bondage , why- that would be asking a lot, right?

but the basics are simple enough, yes? give the wretched creature the comforting warmth he wants, then perhaps inch closer to something bordering uncomfortable? Too Much? have him seek out what he craves, only to be burned (metaphorically and/or literally) if he indulges himself too much? oops! someone's become a slave to their senses!

i'm just saying that the sensory perception of yokai vs kink is (relatively) unknown territory. if temperature play already messes with humans, what could it possibly do to yakumo? he could experience it in facets unknown to others.-=- to levels others are incapable of appreciating---- like someone with synesthesia who can experience music with another layer of enjoyment.

if you give a snake ice cream, followed by a hot piece of meat [unknown origin], it'll really make him aware of the contrast, hmm??????

anyway. sorry about that. i'm not super clear on the specifics of it all. i just thought it peculiar that i haven't seen the yaku-hot-cold-sensitivity-finagling. out there, in here, nowhere as far as i've seen..

...or is it located in a part of the building i overlooked? if so, could you direct me there? i would really appreciate it.

if you don't have it after all, that's ok. i'll keep a careful watch now that i know what i'm looking for. maybe it's one of those things where, once i actively search for it, i'll notice it everywhere! wouldn't that be delightful!

with that, i guess i'll be on my way. thanks for your patience. yeah, i hope i find it too. have a good one!!

[harwin-breakbones-strong]

Men of House Strong | Matthew Needham, Gavin Spokes & Ryan Corr

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

My favorite thing to do in the last week has probably been reading people's made up stories in SDV fandom along the lines of "am I the asshole (aita) for bla bla bla...", with both our (Farmer's) side and the NPC's side. Like "AITA: I yelled at my husband for feeding our kids pizza puffs cereal instead of healthy food". Or "My spouse has a crazy obsession with drinking mayonnaise, should I divorce them?"

[cakemoney]

mismag thoughts under the cut cause this got personal in a weird way lol

been chewing on k and evan's argument all day because i know that the entire point of how they played it is that both k and evan are right and wrong and they both have points but the situation is complicated and they're young and have difficulty expressing themselves et cetera, but there's stuff i need to unpack before i can come at it with (at least less of) my personal bias. because the way k said "you can only take care of somebody for so long" brought up something old and just. who asked you to take care of me? who asked you to form a one-sided relationship with someone whom you perceived as broken? do you think that i want this? do you think i want to have a friend look at me with pity, as though i'm lesser? don't you think i already know exactly what i am? don't you think i'm already doing exactly what i can? if it pains you to look at me, then look away! if being my friend is too much, then leave!

but obviously, that's not what k said. (also obviously not what the real life person said.) what k said (tried to say) was: it's hard to be around someone who doesn't believe you when you express love; by refusing to value yourself, you're also refusing to value the judgment and thought and feeling of people who value you, by dismissing yourself and your own needs as insignificant you're belittling people who care about those things, and being friends with or being in a relationship with someone who keeps pushing you back and throwing your care away is incredibly draining. this doesn't make it right for her to overlook his dismissal of a poorly healed arm as a concern, but it represents a pattern that k has difficulty navigating. she wants to care, and evan keeps downplaying that care, and that makes her want to prove her care all the more because evan is important to her!

at the same time, evan's not wrong for feeling betrayed by the way k treated/treats him. these kelmpisms that come from surviving the life that he lived, that are a part of who he was no matter how much he didn't like them, went from being sexy and cool to Problems that k thinks should be fixed, but his entire life of trauma and isolation doesn't disappear just because he's dating k or just because k is no longer horny about it. evan is evan, and the way he struggles with normalcy and self worth was always going to be a long process, and it's very invalidating to hear someone say that this got old. imagine how old it feels for evan, who's been living this way his entire life.

the argument becomes about the broken magic, because them breaking up and magic being broken probably happened pretty close in time, and it sounds like they've had this disagreement before, like it had become the surrogate for discussing their own relationship to each other. evan's saying, clumsily: i told you these things, and you didn't trust me or believe me, and i'm upset by that because these issues and their consequences are things i lived through and continue to live through. k's saying, but failing to say: i know that you're making very salient points and that you already have a methodology in mind that makes sense to you, but you're asking me to sit back and do nothing, and i can't accept that; i can't accept not helping, because i care about the people this affects. in some ways, both of them are just stubborn; they just actually have different points of view, and maybe this wouldn't be a fight if they hadn't also tangled it with their straining relationship. why don't you trust me to help? why don't you trust me to handle it? why don't you trust that i have something to contribute? why don't you trust that i am doing my best?

neither of them necessarily distrust the other; they just don't trust themselves enough to let go and let someone else take the wheel, because they both think they've already fucked something up, maybe beyond repair, maybe forever. when you already doubt yourself, any sign of disapproval from someone you like and care about and respect and admire so much can feel so fatal

[jesuis-snips]

LIES: Palestine is murdering civilians.

TRUTH: Palestine is expelling occupiers.

LIES: Palestine is attacking Israel.

TRUTH: Palestine is standing upon its rights in its own lands.

LIES: Hamas is giving Israel reasons to attack them.

TRUTH: Israel has already been attacking Palestinians without a reason for years. Every resistance counts and weakens Israel.

LIES: Israel is the victim.

TRUTH: Israel is suffering for its sins for the innocent children they have killed.

[gingermintpepper]

I saw it in your tag game post that you're also fond of the Apollo-Heracles conflict 👀 for a myth that appears in only a couple of sources, it sure has a lot of presence in the vase paintings (no seriously, everytime I think I've seen the last of it, I find ten more)

SO do you have any favorites among the paintings that represent this story??

OMG OMG THIS ASK IS A GIFT. IT IS A GIFT THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR LETTING ME TALK ABOUT THIS

I also think it's extremely interesting that it's a story so popularly portrayed by vase paintings and in such a variety of ways!! It's certainly one of the stories that gets left out of written compilation of Heracles' legend a bit (which is a shame, I think it's a fantastic story) but Apollo had a very peculiar relationship with Heracles in general that I just kind of find amazing (and very, very funny).

Apollo is not a god with any legitimate grudge against Heracles, but he does argue with the mortal a bit like he argues with his favourite brothers 😂Part of why I love the story of Apollo and Heracles fighting over the tripod so much is that it is such a little brother thing for Heracles to be upset with the proclamation his elder brother has given him and so, he throws a great fit, taking up the chair and declaring that he'll just give himself a better prophecy! And Apollo, instead of being a marginally professional big brother, decides to fight him for it until their father has to break up their cat-fight. Like was that not just the plot of the Homeric Hymn to Hermes? Is this not exactly how Apollo treated Hermes when he was a child and now those two are inseparable? 💀

Because of this, my favourite vase paintings tend to be the ones that highlight the personal squabbling between Apollo and Heracles the most. There are some very elaborate ones that have the full host of them - Athena, Heracles, Apollo, Artemis, usually a dog and a doe, I've even seen a couple that had birds and plants etched on them, but the simplest ones that show Heracles about to bonk Apollo with his club out of frustration or depict Heracles nyooming away from Apollo while Apollo (presumably) yells curses about how he's going to fling Heracles head first into Tartarus for daring to take his things? Yeah, those are the premium big brother/little brother things I'm looking for.

(Photo. Marie-Lan Ngyuen)

(Photo. Museo Claudio Faina)

Also the one in the Theoi.com archives is a real classic - perfect energy.

[edorazzi]

Tintin & Captain Haddock trying out the "Grimace Shake"

Well it is Tintin Day! ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

Great snakes! But don't worry, Haddock will be fine. Probably.