#i don't know what u want from meeeeee

[greedkinggreaser]

Why do you always need to ask for basic necessities

Short story: Capitalism sucks bro -shrugs- It's either ask and pray I get some help or starve to death my dude (and be homeless again)

Long story:

Art currently is my full-time job as I take care of a 92 yr old woman. I live with 2 men who don't have jobs. (one moved out but back in after getting fired because of racism) and the other is disabled. Btw I am paying for everything with the money I make online which is NOT MUCH.

I need to ask because I don't have money so I can survive, I open commissions and adopts constantly so there isn't always asking.

I don't know dude capitalism sucks, I wouldn't even be having this stupid post rn if I had an SSC, and that's an entire fiasco rn because I can't even get it without an ID. :') and guess what you can't get without an SSC? An ID. Until I get food stamps figured out and an ID. I'm stuck.

I'd quick art/the internet if I had a job rn.

I don't even know what to say to these kinda questions? Like why does anyone need help with basic necessities? I'm low-income, and impoverished, and don't have a job rn cause I can't get a job.

I don't have a social security card anymore (looked everywhere for it), I don't have an active state ID, and I need to get a social security card that I need to get an ID. can't use my birth certificate to get it. So without the ID and SSC, I can't get food stamps to just buy food.

Like what do you want some admission of manipulation and guilt or a sob story?

Like I've mentioned I was abused and starved. I'm taking care of said person cause she's 92 and I live with her and she can barely walk 5 inches without falling.

My family that lives close enough does not help financially at all. like shit, they let me be homeless for a year and STILL starved me and abused me when I did move back. WHICH I HAD MOVED OUT FOR ORIGINALLY.

Also, no one is obligated to help and rarely does help. I get most of my help from friends and my partner at this point. I of course can't rely on them constantly, so I have this post if people wanna help and I open commissions when I'm not busy or going through it emotionally/mentally, or physically. (cause I do have health problems)

Stop asking me these questions? I won't ever have a satisfactory answer for anyone who asks this.

[short-yandere-stories]

okay so---i read the lil fic of reader friendzoning sebastian and i saw your requests were open so here I AM-

Could I get a fanfic of Sebastian with a reader who ✨does✨ have a crush on him but ignores his advances because she happens to have a rather low self-esteem and simply "doesn't want to get the wrong idea" —if possible? if you can't either way it's cool .u.

I am so glad you're here! :D And hoo boy I can recognize myself in that for sure and this would 100% be me hands down. Also sorry for the tiiiiime this has taken meeeeee ugh life is. Annoying. Something I do know for certain, however, is that a yandere Sebastian would not stand for any low self-esteem. Especially not from someone as wonderful and perfect as you.

This can be read as a standalone thing or sort of a continuation of the last one!

Yandere is mainly at the very end because it became just so nice and soft and aaaaahh

:✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧ ･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:

SFW, no major TW/CW, but mentions reader with low self-esteem feeling insecure and disliking themselves. :✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:

"Not Good Enough for Me?"

:✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:

"Milady, are you alright? You've been staring through that window for quite some time now." Jumping at the sudden voice, you turn around, gaze landing on the tall, elegant butler peeking in through your door. At your acknowledgment, he takes a step into your room, closing the door behind him with a soft 'click'.

"You have not moved from this spot since at least about half an hour ago. I saw you standing there while I assisted Finnian in the gardens." You look away, nervously picking at the skin around your nails. "I'm fine," you say with a forced laugh. "Just got lost in thought I guess." Slowly, Sebastian moves closer to you, making sure that you can clearly see him at any point. He closely monitors your body language, ready to stop the second he sees you flinching or turning away.

"Is it about my confession during the afternoon tea last afternoon?" He asks, hitting the nail on its head. He has to keep a chuckle in as you wince. "I meant no disrespect or harm, I can assure you," he continued. "And if I have made you uncomfortable with any of my advances, I-" "No!" You yelp, cutting him off. You snap around to finally look at him, eyes wide in a panic and hands thrown up in front of you, waving in dismissal. "I mean..." you continue in a timid tone, cheeks heating up at your outburst.

"You didn't make me uncomfortable at all, Sebastian," you say, eyes pleading with him to believe you. "It was actually really sweet and it made me extremely happy to hear. I just..." you trail off, looking down at the floor, unable to keep his gaze any longer.

"I just don't think you'd want to be with someone like me." Your voice grows increasingly quiet the longer the sentence goes on, and even Sebastian with his demonic powers and enhanced senses has to strain to catch your words.

"What?" he breathes, confusion and bewilderment etched on his face.

You turn back to face the window, wrapping your arms around yourself in an attempt of comfort, trying your hardest to keep the tears threatening to form at bay.

"I just... I'm nothing special. I'm not really pretty or smart... I'm clumsy and mess up, and I can't ever do anything right." Tears blur your vision as you try to keep your voice from shaking. "I don't know why you'd want to be with me," you confess, finally, shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

"You deserve someone better than me."

If he had a heart in the same way that humans do, Sebastian was sure that it would have shattered upon hearing those words. How had he missed your feelings in regard to yourself like this? The anger he felt aimed towards himself for missing such a crucial thing had completely blocked out the meaning of your words for a moment until they finally registered. You loved him. More than that, you'd avoided his advances and tried to push him aside not because you didn't reciprocate, but because you didn't think you were good enough.

In a flash, he's by your side, wrapping his strong arms around you and pulling you into his chest. Your hands weakly cling to his waistcoat, tears wetting the fabric of his shirt. "Sweetheart," he whispers, raising one gloved hand to pet your hair.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not noticing how you felt about yourself and adding to that burden," he begins, holding your crying form close. "But you're wrong. About all of it." You cry harder and try to push him away, but he doesn't budge.

"You are special. So very special to me, darling, you don't even know half of it. You have the most beautiful soul of any person I have ever met. I love every single part of you. I love the color of your eyes, the way your entire face lights up when you smile. I love your mind and the way it works. Sure, you mess up sometimes, but every human does! It has never once made me think less of you. If anything, watching you trip over nothing only makes me see you as even more endearing than before." Relaxing his hold on you enough for him to bend down and look you in the eyes, he continues. "I love everything about you, flaws and all. I wouldn't change anything about you." One of his hands wipes away a few tears from your cheek before gently cradling it in his palm.

"There is no one that could be 'better for me' than you. You're perfect in my eyes. I hope that I can make you see that too, someday," he whispers.

More tears flow down your cheeks, and for a moment, Sebastian thinks that he has done something wrong, but then your face cracks into a smile. "Do you really mean that?" you ask meekly. "Or are you just saying it to make me feel better?" Instead of giving you a verbal answer, Sebastian leans in and presses his cold lips against yours. For a moment, you're unresponsive, frozen in shock. Then, your hands grab his shoulders, and you kiss back.

The feeling of your soft, warm lips against his is something Sebastian has dreamed of for so long. He can barely believe that it's happening. Your warmth, the softness of your body pressed against him is everything he ever wanted.

Possessive thoughts flash through his mind, solidifying what he already knew. This was where you belonged. By his side, in his arms. With him, forever. He would make sure that your thoughts never hurt you ever again. No matter how many times he had to reassure you, hold you, and help push those negative feelings aside, he would.

You were finally his. You finally reciprocated his feelings, and Sebastian would be damned if he let anything -- your own thoughts included -- hurt you.

:✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧*:

[sea-of-dust]

WHHHAAAAAAAAA

Lyney,Venti,Hu Tao x Gn! Reader

summary: imagine getting spooked on Halloween and then they get spooked by a nightmare.

Notes: lyney...LYNEYYYYYY, I got my ass kicked by @nian-7 for an event. Don't question it please it's a horrible story. Modern au

Hehe~ FYM HEHE. The amount of TIMES this man has scared the hell out of u during October. Magic tricks, flying shopping lists you name it he's scared you with it.

He adores you don't get him wrong, but it's fun seeing your scared expression, watching you cover your face and quiver its cute! But he does wonder if you do get infuriated

You can tell when he thinks this, only three or two scares on days he doubts, 5 or 4 when he's feeling cheeky, and one because he's either planning a bigger scare that may cause you to verbally scream, or if he just wanted to give you a break.

You can't really get back at him for his antics he just smiles. "My such a small spider for someone as delicate as you to hold" he takes it and kisses your cheek. You tried every scare you knew on him only for him to just turn it into a flirtatious move.

And so your final scare...one you didn't even think would scare him. You got out of bed to get some water stumbling out while he twists and turns in bed searching for you with his eyes closed, when he tries to find you and fails his eyes shoot open. You lean down to get some water hearing heavy steps toward you, stoppping suddenly you notice his distressed face when as soon as he lays his eyes on you he nearly tackles you, not saying a word yet trying to hold back his sniffles. "You alright?" You hug him softly but he hugs you tighter.

Trying not to show you his face he burries it into your chest. "Lyney?" You wrap your arms around his waist bringing him closer, hearing him take a few small breaths before looking up at you as if that never happened. "Ah my darling y/n! I guarantee nothing is-" "bull" you point at his cheek "your make-ups a bit smudged" rubbing it a bit watching it smear "must have been a nightmare, lemme help you fix it"

You help him wipe off his make up watching him avoid eye contact a few times. "What was it about?" sighing you scoot closer cupping his cheeks, he doesn't answer looking down a few times. "And why do you wear make-up while you- that isn't important whatever it was im sure youll feel better after you sleep" as soon as you finish the small tear drop and put down the brush he mearly tackles you. "Thank you..."

He's gonna make you wanna rethink your life decisions. "Hey y/n wanna know what month it is" "God please just get him away from me" "hehe"

He likes smaller scares only small kisses or random taps sometimes a whisper behind your ear.

The worst he will use the wind to blow at your ear, and then you turn around and see he's not there only to pop up upfront of you.

Best part for him? He always gets to show affection while bullying you. His two favorite things ever

His favorite activity during this time is dragging you to Haunted houses. "AHHHHHH Y/N ITS SO SCARY LETS LEAVE!!" "We already paid" "BUT THE GHOST IS SO REAL LOOKING AAAA" "you can litterally see the paint chipping" "PROTECT MEEEEEE" you have to give him piggy back rides out still not believing he's scared of a little wooden cut out, atleast he got cuddled by you at home saying something along the lines of "I'll cover your eyes next time don't worry".

Fun fact he "totally" wasn't he had diluc vogue for him horribly. "He just wanted to have an excuse to hug you" "with the way he yelps? That guy's got a problem" "yea..." flawless convincing

He wakes up in the middle of the night because he had a bad dream. Definitely hugs the life outta you. Sometimes they aren't even that scary but he still hugs you he just looks for any excuse for a cuddle

If you ever scared him you might be able to get him to cry. Of course you don't push him to that point unless he deserves it for thinking hiding a realistic spider sticker in the bathroom is funny but that's another story there's always a simple "scary figure in the dark!" Tatic. He's always fallen for it and will get behind you seeing it

The worst scare however will always be...DIONA?? he sees her in his nightmares. Just thinking of sneezing so uncontrollably infront of you, he knows you knew about his allergy but he's just scared of embrassing himself just because of a cat bartender. He already sees her flexing her ability to bring him to his knees trying to show why you shouldn't be like him

Only time he screams when waking up and the only time he dosent cuddle you after a nightmare. He practically shakes you awake about it. "I know there's a bit of cat hair on me" "really?" "No I just wanted you to get so scared you fainted please go to bed" you grab his arm pulling him down "it'll be fine I'll be sure to keep cats away" toying with him a bit pulling him closer. "Please let's just sleep" he hugs you back suddenly softly falling asleep after

COME HERE!!! she's using that ghost to torture you into staying by her side even more during this time of jumpscarin people.

This is like free ads "what if we use this time to promote the coffins as decor?" "Wouldn't that result in backlash?" "Not if they're of lower quality" she's definitely putting them on sale

She loves this time of year so much she is more into making you shop with her and then scaring you.

Not only with her ghost but also with locations she walks with you to. "It's once said people have come here only to not make it out the other side!" "They're right there tho" you point at the line exiting next to you. "Shush lemme continue my legend"

She also likes you scaring her from behind but also just appearing from normal. "BOO!" "Oldest trick in the- WOUAGH" the ghost busting through her face suddenly as she gives the thing a high five. "Never do that again" "Doin it again!" "No!"

She will resort to using realistic looking monsters and bones. "Watch we'll scare away these kids!" "That's not the point" she shushes you quickly "who knows maybe they'll be too busy running away to even get any candy" "just don't take all the candy for yourself" "I won't after all you'll always be at the bottom of the bucket" you sigh harshly kissing her cheek "I hate your jokes so much"

You don't really try to scare her back knowing you can't top her in this department. So you just took em....even the horrendous petnames.

"Hey pookie" your eyes widen at that nickname. "No." "You know well enough it's dangerous to go alone~" "honey please stop trying to make me join your weird ghost hunting thing" "noooo come on its 50 percent off" "there wasn't a price anyway" you went into the mountains staying straight faced even when some of the scares got you, thank God for your ability to appear as if you don't care.

She goes to sleep at night happy she got to bully you, until that nightmare hit her like a truck, her eyes shoot open as she slowly scoots over to you wrapping her arms around you. "You wouldn't right?" She blows near your ear. "You wouldn't..." she lays as close to you as physically possible

She'd fall asleep soon after and then wake up with a "WOAAOAOAAOAOA" "huh?" "YOU" she covers her face inching away. "I what?" You could feel your eye bags get darker so you turn around and try to go back to sleep, unfortunately she gets all up in your face "you didn't really say you wouldnt love me if i didnt exist" "WHAT?!?" You wake up fully at her statement turning quickly toward her. "YOU DID IN MY DREAM!" "WELL DREAM ME CAN FLY OFF SOMEWHERE AND NEVER COME BACK!!" You hug her tightly "I would love you if you didn't exist, you mean alot to me even if you're horrid this time of year" placing a small kiss on her cheek you go back to sleep rather quickly. Doesn't stop her from clinging onto you like a stuffed toy. She'll be enjoying playing with your hair for the next few minutes before she falls asleep aswell

[rinhaler]

Rin had you sprawled out on the expensive boucle couch he helped you pick out when the house was still being built. He gave mercy on your thighs, his usual iron grip replaced with feathery fingers gently keeping your legs spread, one hand caressing the soft skin of your leg, the other splayed across your mound with a skilled thumb teasing your clit back and forth. Soft, breathy moans bleed from your spit glossed lips, lifting your hips a little of the seat, his head that rests on your other thigh follows the movement.

“Please Rin, pleasepleaseplease, more baby, I want you so bad,” you couldn’t help but to be a pathetic, desperate mess even though he was barely toying with you. It was just already too much and not enough at the same time. You finally had your closest, most dear friend right where you wanted him.

Rin’s so fucking lost in your dripping cunt he can barely make sense of your pleas, but the better, more intuned half of him takes hold of your words and musters a reply. “I know you fucking do, hang on, honey, I’m getting to it.” He chuckles, so damn cocky, and you can’t stop the smile from taking over your face. Any type of laughter he ever grants you is a gift, something he really only reserves for you. His lips place a wet smack near the crevice of your thighs, so close yet still so far away from where you need him the most.

He runs a shaky hand through his hair, before bringing it up to cup the underside of your breasts. “You had me drooling like a fuckin’ dog,” he begins, meanly twisting one of your nipples, trying to catch his breath and not look pathetic, “before I even had your panties off, so I’m gonna make sure you’re begging and crying until I give this pretty little pussy what she wants, you understand me?” Keeping his dominance, he spanks your cunt once, then twice, earning a high pitched whine from you.

You dumbly nod your head, “Yes, sir!!” The words leave you much too quickly for your liking, trying so hard to keep your regular cool composure, but let’s be honest, that went out the fucking window as soon as he gave you the right wrong look.

-

Hehehehehehehe I’m drunk n high I literally just wrote this in ur ask box lmfaoooo, I love writing under the influence it’s so nice 🤩 question/ statement: I totally think Rin would be a stoner if his gf was, like he can’t NOT participate with you when u get even more giggly and touchy than usual….thoughts? Luv uuuuuuu :D ‼️‼️ 🧋

⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THIS IS SO GOOD MY TOES ARE CURLING MY HEART IS POUNDING I'M SPEECHLESS HELP MEEEEEE omg I cannot wait for the full fic I'm DYING

also the fact that you wrote this in my ask box is making me think of when you'd let a friend doodle on your arm during class 😭😭 so cute

I'm so in love with this man and you're FUELLING ME LIKE CRAAAAZY omg thank you so much for the food.

In regards to Rin smoking I think obviously it depends on the AU or circumstance or whatever but whenever I think of Rin having a girlfriend I like to think he's really possessive and controlling. (This is very specific to me and my desires so please take with a pinch of salt). But I don't think he's a smoker and I think he'd actually be very against it and demand you not to smoke either. I like the idea of him punishing you for disobeying too 😏😏😏 I just think him and Sae are from a quite well to do family and I think he takes his career as a footballer too seriously to dabble in smoking.

Anyway that's just one scenario, obviously skater boy loser boy stoner boy would be way more into it than my iteration!

[donnyclaws]

just visited the Tiger Crawl Home section of your neocities site and i love love LOVE how you've formatted it!!! the pngs combined with the observations from scholars is just AUGH i can't describe how many little bells it rings for me in my head. (btw if you don't mind, would you be willing to share where you got the pngs?)

I'm soooo happy to hear that!!!! that's very much just my tester page rn im still trying to decide how i want to organize snippets and present things (eventually it'll have a bigger landing page to navigate by content too) I'm being very picky abt it and not posting it till it's good enough in my mind. but anyway anyway I'm really thrilled to hear u going to it just at random and liking it enough to tell meeeeee ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 I'd love to know what bells it's ringing for you if you wouldn't mind saying? I'm curious and would love to snoop around similar projects / vibes.

For the pngs they're mostly from pinterest! Except for the skull which is like a narwhal/beluga skull I've been obsessed with for a while hehe. I do need to go back and credit them directly on the images itself though so I'll try do that now👍

[monstress]

succession finale thoughts

rewatching already because i need to write this down while i'm still on that finale high

the immediate problem of the episode is stewy making drama. i love himmm

why would "golden parachute" frank even be in the consideration to vote 'no' for the deal??? we're grasping at straws here oh i feel for tellis despite his soulless blond self

NICKY BEE FIRE IT UP ONE LAST TIME ... god im gonna miss this theme song 🥺

when shiv said that tom is easy to manipulate while mattson is looking at the political cartoon of them. what a blunder

shiv calling her mom an associate in front of mattson slkflskgls

"are there any positives about the nightmare we've shared?" "yeah you've fallen in love finally. fallen in love with our scheduling opportunities." goddddd im so obsessed...yessss they're so awfulllllll like so true jesse make this show also a story of their marriage noah baumbach whomst????

sorry to be so kenstewpilled but the white button down, sleeves rolled up and this line???? delectable. i must speak my truth here like how could stewy not vote 'no'?

new jess.....good for you Jess you escaped this sinking ship

i gasped seeing kendall's sunglasses this episode. that has to be japanese made. nowhere else in the world make such stylish sunglasses. gorgeous pair

greg makes 200k? per month OR year????? answer me. answer meeeeee

love the Lawrence name drop! like we miss u king

the entire lukas and tom dinner scene is sooooo

tom confessing all he he built was sand and he's paranoid to keep what he has. mattson knowing he's hungry but wants to know if he's willing to betray shiv

THEN lukas immediately belittling shiv : she was pushy, she wasn't as vital as i thought she'd be, i'm SUCH a big man i know everything, she's fuckable and she wants me too

and TOM eats it????? so mattson chooses him !!!!

ugh i dont want shiv she has a lot of ideas and i want to fuck her ugh fucking disgusting ubermensch i hope jeryd doesn't win ohio and waystar royco gojogo get FCC up in their ass

alexander skarsgard's line read and acting choices r amazing tho

me to my sister: why haven't any of them used a live translator to check what the swedes are talking about? (greg in the final episode uses one) OK FINALLYYYY

shiv screaming from another room is hilarious

logan promised kendall ceo when he was seven.......the crown prince.....if dad didn't need me i don't know what i would be for.....

shiv and roman bonding at the beach after election night. when they're doing impressions of kendall and knowing sarah and kieran are each other's fave scene partners....this scene was the one that hit me that i'm watching the FINALE finale

meal fit for a king scene....when i watched this scene i was all smiles but underneath the DREADDD knowing they might be showing this because it may be the final time the scenes are happy together. oh honey. we got a big storm coming.

not shiv saying all that to willa and connor not getting slovenia in the end....the terror

the iphone video dinner scene? cheesy as fuckkkkk im sorry that was sentimental as shit and maybe a tad unnecessary. i did cry tho i did...

"IT'S FUCKING TOM." the fight in the bathroom??? mattson rallying his crew???? the convoy to hq??? with THE MUSICCCCC???? FUCKKKK UGH HOT UGH!!!! GO OFF NICHOLAS!!!!

loveeee roman's all black outfit. so chic! (he's still mourning 🙃)

and we cheered. if anything else, us gay stewy truthers won succession

(also noticed that in the above pic - the only picture of the kids on logan's table is shiv. forshadowing? maybe, maybe not but lol)

the final 20 minutes of the finale *screaming into a pillow*

like roman immediately spiralling upon seeing gerri. doubting himself, questioning his autonomy, his worth. and did kendall....break roman's stitches on purpose. to like?? steady him somewhat??? good god. what the fuck.

shiv in this shot like...this is the closest to ultimate power she'll ever have and she's reveling in it. despite herself, she enjoys being kingmaker. that's why she went into politics

it's just. i wanna wrap my head around why shiv didn't vote 'no'. is it because she *has* seen the toxicity of protecting this company infect her brothers during election night? they should take the deal and get out? is it to freeze kendall and roman out of the company as they often had done to her? if i can't be ceo, then no one can? and mattson wants tom to be the ceo and i get to manipulate tom so i win this battle? i can keep my proximity of power by virtue of being a woman that my brothers would never have? is that it? does this make sense?

(but we all know mattson is keeping tom because he's a yes man. he won't have any real power in the waystar royco gojogo so like *sad kazoo noise*)

kendall lying about the manslaughter not being real. the real thing they've bonded over??? just because it may not make him ceo??? jelly-spined move

shiv laughing kendall going 'i'm the eldest boy' and walking away going "fucking child". lmaooo deserved

i wonder if roman saying all that abt sophie & iverson is a way to distract kendall from shiv, maybe even a little spite to get back at him for supposedly lying abt the manslaughter

roman going "we're nothing." yeah...yeah....you are.....

(but they have 195 per share....so)

kendall clicking the elevator to floor zero. cinema.

the one guy entering the elevator with kendall. has he been oblivious abt what just went down? if it were me, i'd wait for the next one

tom being ceo slgjklskglskglsklhgsfglskg

him keeping gerri and karolina this is a win for the glass ceiling shatterers /jk

and tom keeping greg? will he needs someone to bully since mattson&mencken is gonna use him as a punching bag in turn lol

yes the tiger! he destroyed his cage! yes YES the tiger is out!!!!

i truly can't believe that roman came out of this series unscathed (somewhat). like his breakthrough this episode? him realizing his self worth has been hinged on inheriting the company aka his father's love? time to go back to therapy

(also him drinking a martini because that's gerri's favorite drink. what a choice!)

and friends i was rubbing my hands with anticipation when tom approaches the car just hoping hopingggg shiv was in it and when it turns out she was??? i was chanting 'hand in unlovable hand' over and over and when tom offered his hand??? i was fully clapping it AND when shiv TOOK IT?? i was fully screamingggg

in all seriousness, what a bleak ending for shiv. relegating herself as the wife of ceo. just like her mother. the power dynamics of the man she think is beneath her is now her husband and the father of her child and in the company position she coveted all her life. she can never win...she willing stay in the tarpit....shiv my tragic girlfailure i love youuu

when kendall shows up in the park in a tweed coat i was like 'oooo i hope colin is behind him' and when they pan to show he is?????? i was cheering. the micheal corleonification of kendall roy

head under water.....aaaahhhh ambigious kendeath my beloved <3

[mrs-monaghan]

yknow the funny thing i realized??? if bts were another group entirely, and there was a pair with yoonmin dynamics i’d gravitate towards that ship. i like that dynamic A LOOOOT

BUT jikook man they just have so many questionable moments that they’re so hard to ignore and i honestly tried lmaooo. cuz all that lovey dovey shit isn’t even my taste like their interactions give me 2nd hand embarrassment cuz it’s just out in the open. they’re too much of an /established-relationship/ ao3 tag irl

anyway in an alternate universe where jikook isnt real (not this world obvsly), yoonmin could definitely be a hot thing cuz that queer energy and tension and bickering is *chef’s kiss*

pretty sure jungkook sees it too 😂 sorry jk let me drown in yoonmin fantasies amidst all jikook realness. esp after d-day release cuz god agust d is fucking hot

Listen you don't understand. Taekook is always the first ship that gets recommended by YT to new army. Its why they're so many. But if you're Jimin biased, consuming Jimin content over and over and over, Yoonmin is the first ship YT recommends to you. So when I tell you I used to be a Yoonminer,

BAHAHAHAA! If you haven't explored Jikook it is very easy to believe Yoonmin are a thing and that's mostly because Suga is sus. He behaves the way JK behaves when it comes to Jimin and I can see why a new Jimin biased Army would buy into that ship. Even the 18+ moments aside, Suga always choosing Jimin no matter what. His favourite voice, the member he wants on his team, the member he wants to get punished 😂 member he wants to wear his clothes, member he vocally roots for, defends from the company, protects

Yes, V was ready to throw hands too, but watch how Suga immediately shoved Jimin behind him. Remind u of someone?

First of all, I recommend y'all watch that edit because its hilarious 😂😂 yes JK went after Suga rapunzel style. But what many people missed was that JK continued to be a dick to Suga even after that 😂😂😂 JK was so hot for this I'm sorry. 🔥🔥🔥 My top 5 Jikook moment of all time, easy 💛💜

Where were we? Right, not talking about Yoonmin. So, when it comes to Jimin he also has a soft spot for Suga. He's not sexually attracted to him, he chooses JK over him, and definitely doesn't treat Suga the way he treats JK. If you're just watching Jimin, Yoonmin is just like all other BTS ships. It's really just Suga who makes Yoonmin look sus. And yes JK is supper attuned to Jimin and sees everything so you bet your ass he knows, just like we now. So shh 🤫 let's not talk about Yoonmin

And yes anon, I can't stop watching this MV. Fuck meeeeee 🥵🥵🥵🥵🔥🔥🔥💦💦

Oh tweet here

[roseband]

My VVVIP experience with The Rose (very long):

I did the triple VIP package in Stockholm, Sweden with the boys <3

For the green room tour, they all started with a hug, which was very nice... they're all very short hahaha, but so handsome.

When I first got into the room, Dojoon commented that my top looked like some of the jackets they wear on stage, so I was happy that he noticed that lol (done on purpose!!)

The first thing they asked all of us is if we wanted anything to drink, I asked for a diet coke knowing that Hajoon is a diet coke drinker too, which turned into a conversation with them about how diet coke isn't really sold in that area of Europe cause of the chemicals in it, and how we should probably all.... stop. (I drink like 3-4 a day I have a problem)

They asked why I came all the way from NYC, I mentioned that I had a buttload of unused PTO (which they didn't know what that was, which, honestly... artist problems same reason I didn't use mine, I told them that I finally got a staff graphic artist job (forgot to mention the brand and i wanna kermit cause sammy and their photographer both own a lot of stuff from the brand i work for, and like a ton of other idols lol.... like Eric's whole family is a fan of one of the things I do some art on lol (I should seriously send him one of the toddler outfits I did a bunch on for his nephew lol)), vs the freelance I had been doing for 3 yrs before), asked if I had come to multiple cities or had gone on vacation only, and I told them I was on vacation in Sweden/Denmark.

They don't usually get to tourist when on tour, so mainly just plane/train, hotel, concert venue, maybe one part of the city, which is kinda sad ;_; also it must be so tiring, like Dojoon looked super tired and not the healthiest, so I hope he's okay, he kinda kept his distance from us during parts of the tour and also "brain farted" during Q&A......

But they asked how I got there, mentioned plane ofc, but I made a joke that u could probably take a cruise...?? Hajoon said UBER which made the others all laugh

I kinda froze a bit, it was a loooottt, so Dojoon made a joke that I could just stare at them even and it'd be okay...

I asked them if they were going to ever release the old songs (like photographer, omg, greed, can't let you go) that they used to play on their tours in 2017-19, when I mentioned omg/photographer I told Jae I like his little slap bass solos in them <3 <3 <3 (Jae def still has the most idol'y mannerisms cause he did the classic idol compliment, head turn, heart eyes and hands to chest lol)...

They're planning on releasing them in a special way for broses, and Sammy was thinking some sort of like, scavenger hunt type thing on rosarium. (pls give them to meeeeee <3)

I told them I like those (omg and photographer) the most cause I play a bit of bass guitar, even though it's not my main instrument... and that the VIP package made me want to get out my guitars again,, Sammy asked what it was and if it was guitar, which I was like CLARINET!!!! and Bass Clarinet which is like a super big clarinet that goes up to /here/ *stands and gestures height*.

Sammy and Hajoon both came to the conclusion that it's a "clarinet cello" and "like a cello to a violin" which YES!!!

So when they got the ukulele out to sign, going with the violin joke, Jaehyeong mimed it being like a violin hahaha, and as they went to sign it Sammy kvetched about how sharpies smell lol.

So I was still talking to them about the old tracks, and mentioned I was a predebut fan.... and /used to/ (at least my noggin worked there) run a tumblr page of them, and sammy mentioned he used to be on tumblr and would follow/look into fan accounts, so HELP ME, (now i'm certain they've seen that awful video ;~;) but there's no way that he hasn't seen my acct then and that's big bad energy for my brain now lol.

but for the 4 selfies they first asked who your bias was, and when I said jaehyeong soooo quickly they all made fun of me for how fast it was, but OFC!! bass baby.

Jae and I took the two selfies, plus he almost dropped my phone in the middle, so I have a third really derpy one that wasn't supposed to be taken, and then we had the two with ot4...

Pics:

I wanna know what witchcraft they use to look taller in pics though...

And also... my precious (I have to build my display for it now)

___

So after that we went for the stage tour....

I had initially hung by Jae while going on stage (and he helped me up cause their circle part of the stage was a big step up and i was wearing heels and am a klutz)

But I ended up hanging with Sammy and playing Skylar which <3 <3 <3

So two of the girls who were in my group played piano and were hanging with dojoon, and were both super good at piano btw!! <3

When I first put Skylar on I played a little bit of blackbird by the beatles and Dojoon sang alongggg, and then I played the beginning/chorus of back to me like the melody part (IDK I may slip in the audio that I recorded on my watch later, but not sure, I think I may wanna keep those private for me)

But Sammy asked if I wanted to keep playing (so I didn't get a chance on Juicy w/ Jae but that's okay, next year hopefully) and he showed me the chords to b2m and a little bit of the chords for alive.

It's really hard to play on stage, I'm not a guitar family main, and mostly play by tab/ear, so the delay you get from when you pluck/strum the instrument to when you hear it without the IEMs is really confusing.... so now I totally get why when they had that issue with their sound team with their IEMs they kept having such extreme issues cause it's like off by a half second from you playing and hearing it. (I can really only handle that delay on my reeds lol)

Also, rather than having a pedal board where they can change effects during tracks, they actually have them preprogrammed for each song, so they can change distortion type effects based on which song is in the setlist vs what effects they want at the moment. Which is different than when I went on their stage in 2018, cause they had a typical pedal board setup then.

Also when I took off Skylar, I asked Sammy what's with the heavy relic customs (cause he has two now) and he said that he just likes them..... and I sorta joked that in nerd instrument world that's not ok (even though I know someone who played at carnegie with duct tape on her fucking contrabass clarinet) and he said "well guitar can be a nerd instrument too" and like dude u do not know how weird woodwind players are... u do not get it but ily so much

___

Q&A/Soundcheck/Concert was... normal, waiting for fancams to upload now

___

We had one final group photo with the 5 VVVIPs where they also gave us the signed ukuleles and the posters they were holding backstage for us.

We got to hug them all again and we thanked them for the show.

We technically weren't allowed to give them gifts, but that was the only time we weren't watched as much, so one girl slipped them some black rose pins she ordered thru Dojoon, and I gave the keychains that I drew and had printed/manufactured through Sammy.

Sammy was impressed that I had all them and that the sticker on the back of Brittany is on the back, but when I mentioned I drew them he was like "wait you DREW these" so i'm super happy lol

...and then now i have world's worst post concert depression hahaha

[radley-rambles]

Hello there! Multiple things. First, you exist! You have a face! And a voice! Not just the author of a book and want to have read and the owner of a blog I read most every day! Wow! Wow wow wow! Wow! Is that too many wows? Probably. Moving on, the horrors looks like my cat (his name is Oliver and he is dense and grumpy and a guardian and I love him)! Next, we have pronunciations! I pronounce year like "yur," usually, but I sometimes get self-conscious about it. (continued)

I have to go to war with the entire state of Nevada now

I hope u understand

Multiple answers! Whether I exist or not remains a matter of hot debate, as I keep promising to show up to things in person and then forgetting about them. I am Schrodinger's author. Seguing from Schrodinger, The Horrors also exists in an in-between state, at once a chubby cuddle-cat and an eldritch monstrosity who feasts on fingers and my woeful tears. Please give Oliver a kiss on his leetle head for me? It's very important that he knows I love him <3

I love "Yur"! Accents and pronunciation are super interesting to me, and I'm always fascinated by how much variation there is across the world~ I also find it amusing that you, the American, say it as "Yur," as in 'shine yer shoes guvna', while I, the Brit, say it basically as 'yee-ha', despite being the furthest thing imaginable from a cowboy. Look at us, swapping stereotypes!

I'm glad I came up with a few novel ways to mispronounce Nevada. What was your favourite? I must admit, I'm a fan of Neevada! If you wake up one morning and every sign in your state has been graffitied to 'correct' the spelling in line with my terrible pronunciation, you know who's to blame. Thank you for telling me the actual pronunciation! If the one thing I take from today is that Nevada has a dad hidden in the middle of it, I'll be happy.

And last but not least - you can certainly ask me writing questions! And ramble about your life! And tell me Oliver facts (though I'm afraid I'll have to demand cat tax.... pleasepleaseplease show me his squishy little face)! My inbox is open!

I hope you enjoy my book! I'm honestly thrilled that you're excited for it. Hearing that means a lot!

I'm dropping the links below as a shameless self-promo, don't mind meeeeee

Tweet!

Goodreads page!

BUY MY BOOK HERE!

UK version here!

[ddejavvu]

okay hiiii sorry if this is too much but it’s the anon from the other night who was gushing over ur hangman fic and i’m more awake now and i just have to let u know all these thoughts. i have NAWT stopped thinking about the fic????? i feel like u laced it with crack or something????? i’ve read it like 7 times like what…! i recently watched tgm for the first time and this fic coincided w my obsession so perfectly oh wow. but literally you write jake so so well likeeee yea yea let’s go characterisationnnnnnn!!!! like he’s such a cocky idiot but also a loserrrrr!!!! don’t even get me started on the way u write dialogue i am crying shaking throwing sobbing etc it’s so playful and full of banter yet so sweet and tender yeeeowch ur so crazily good at writing in general duh but specifically hitting that sweet spot!!!!! like that’s insaneeeeee! one day scientists will analyse the impacts ur writing has on the human brain, like that’s how meaningful ur stories are. i’m so serious, my brain chemistry has been altered 4everrrrr. the parts where he was so upset over being (allegedly!) manhandled and thinking he was hated… the necklace… the fact that he would be a sentimental ass loser and keep photos in a pizza box… all that got me like wow ok sometimes baby girl is a grown ass man with two confirmed air combat kills 🤷🏻‍♀️ also obsessed with the level of thought put into the lock and keys ansjfjxbzksjd it’s all about the details yeaaaa!!!!!!! but yeah again thank u so sooooo much for ur writing!!!!!!! so glad i stumbled upon it, feels like a warm ass hug all the time, keep doing what u do (obviously only if you want to duhhh) hope ur super well, all the loveeeeeee! <3 <3 <3

YOU SPOILLLL MEEEEEE this was so so so sweet!! seriously, i was nervous about posting that and i was even a bit bummed out about it but this 100% cured me!! honestly, this reaction is all any author ever wants, so thank you so much for telling me :')))))

ohhhh hehe i caught you in your top gun era >:) perfect!! i'm glad you thought hangman was in character, i just rewatched the movie the other day and had Feelings about him hehe <3

SCIENTISTS ANALYZING THE EFFECTS OF MY WRITING ON THE HUMAN BRAIN do you think you could have made me want to marry you any more in one single sentence.. that is such a special compliment!!! thank you lovebug, that means so much to me :')))

allegedly manhandled!!! u have to treat him so nice and soft and sweet he is literally just a baby :/ just a little babygirl :/

no bc the thought of him keeping pictures in a pizza box is so Hangman to me like oh boy does he care but he's going to do it in what seems like the most lazy way possible - like yes my treasured memories!! hope the grease stains from last week's meat lovers don't soak into the pictures <3

i think sometimes i detail my writing too much, so i'm thrilled that you enjoyed it!!!!! i know he's a chronic Key Misplacer, so it felt in character <3

i'm so not gonna lie to you i've been feeling so shitty about my writing lately, both because i've been thinking it's not my best and because i haven't written much lately, which are both totally okay!! but my brain has been putting me through the wringer here, so this message really came at a perfect time :') thank you so much darling, from the bottom of my heart, you've just made my entire year!! i love you bunches :') <333

[tinandabin]

Hellooo I saw your request are open my eyes literally sparkled! Anyway. can I request a Yandere Kokushibo X fem reader where the reader escaped Kokushibo after months of being caged from his grasp,( this is where the timeskip go). Two or three years later Kokushibo managed to find her again not until he noticed a child who looks human but has demon powers (Half Demon) you can continue the rest THANK YOU I LOVE YOUR WRITING 🥰

TYYY AND IM VERY SORRY FOR THE WAIT!! I hope u enjoy this. <333

Thank Muzan for the first time ever because he has sent Kokushibo on a long mission. A LONG ONE. NO JOKE.

You would fucking kiss Muzan's feet without hesitation if you see him. For once he is a saviour.

And of course no one likes to be trapped like a caged bird, like bro, you are tired of eating raw fucking carrots everyday because that is all that shitty Kokushibo can manage. He can barely get you clean water and he says that he would bring the stars for you /j.

Of course, you will take this golden opportunity. No more being scared. KOKUSHIBO ISN'T YOUR FUCKING MOM. MAN UP.

And so you started using your brain, higher than Einstein could, to break the fucking complex shitty lock-system that rat-assed hair man left.

I swear your brain hasn't brained so much in like, 7 hours 37 minutes 28 seconds.

What you didn't realize were the horrors that awaited you in the future. Not now though, you were busy eating flowers.

Skip to Kokushibo finds you escaped, rage-quits, goes through the 5 stages of grief and searches the whole milky galaxy for you but somehow doesn't search one small village. Typical Kokushibo to forget to search one village!

5 months later, your belly has popped, like really popped, like a balloon.

I don't know how to describe pregnancy forgive me.

Fast forward to you giving birth in horror to that half-demon child who literally tried to chomp your leg but whew, thank God and not that dumb fucking Kokushibo that the child, or newborn, didn't have teeth at the moment.

You raised the cutie, very dangerous, has killed multiple rats 👍. Villagers always come screaming to you like, "[NAME] THERE ARE RATS IN MY HOUSE HELP MEEEEEE" and your child darts out like Sonic and somehow murders all of them and eats them and no blood is left. You are known as the 'Rat-Killer Lady.' When it is actually your child.

Okay, I have bullshitted enough. Someone stop my hands from typing this much bullshit.

Anyways, Muzan, Your Saviour, decided he didn't want to be your saviour anymore and sent Kokushibo to that one small particular village where you resided.

And we all know what happens next.

Can we get applause for me getting here.

Thank you.

Kokushibo, being Upper Moon 1, obviously sensed the half-demon child. How could he not, when he could smell his own blood in it? And yours too.

Of course, you couldn't smell him like he could smell you. ( my goodness, what the fuck. )

So it took Kokushibo no time to sweep you off your feet once again, this time with a kid.

The end.

Cries.

Bye.

MASTERLIST

[elsecrytt]

-bursting through your door-

REJECTION SERIES?? HELLO??? The angst potential oh my god i'm salivating at the mere idea

Lucifer getting the full course of enemies-to-lovers troupe because he's a dumbass

Mammon?? Mammon being his tsundere self and cementing himself in a friendzone? YES PLEASE. After he rejects MC they are like "I love you but you and our friendship is more important so i'll be happy with what i have" Meanwhile Mammon "Haha please don't prioritize our friendship you're so sexy haha" DELICIOUS

And if i may suggest an angst plot point in Dia's part. MC thinks that Diavolo treats them like a Lucifer replacement basically "settling in" with something more achievable and rejects HIM because of that???

Barbatos's MC still harboring feeling but knowing that butler will always put Diavolo first and always choose his side if it comes to it? AAAAAAA

-coughs- Just thank you for a delicious treat, dear.

hhhhhhHHHHH IT'S BEEN IN MY BRAIN. SINCE FOREVER CORVIAN. MY GOD IT'S IN THE BRAIN.

You don't have to give it a listen but a big part of the inspiration was this one Florence and the Machine song - Shake it Out.

Basically, there's this one line that's just so beautifully delivered that made me 100% think about MC recovering from being rejected by Lucifer:

"And I am done with my graceless heart/So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart"

AND IT JUST!!! SENDS MEEEEEE! So much pride on both sides! The situation with Lucifer just has me foaming at the mouth. Because can you even imagine?

Lucifer rejects you in the context of Diavolo having feelings for him; he's hyper vigilant, desperately asserting himself and his singleness/independence in this instance because he can, and because a relationship is the last thing on his mind with all these worries, and because really, some stupid human like you?

And then. AND THEN. This!! Stupid!! Fucking!! Peacock!!! FALLS IN LOVE!! Yeah that's right Lucifer you dumb bitch now you really did fuck it up huh??? HUH???

You accepted and respected his decision with all the grace he didn't dare pray Diavolo would, you showed him and his family nothing but kindness while they threatened you, you helped them come together and understand each other.

And what can he do now? What the fuck can he do now? He wants you so badly, more than anything he could ever have dreamed of, and he knows how badly you wanted him.

But do you still want him? How can he even bring himself to ask? The perfect storm of reasons to pursue you and reasons holding him back,,,

hnnnng I am SALIVATING all over it, desperate to know, but man it's not an easy write.

and mammon,,, u remember erin's fuckin. brothers experience your worst memories of them fic?

mammon's line “…And if I can’t manage to save ya, then make sure you die, got it?!” is so well delivered in that work it always hits me like a punch to the gut each goddamn time and it's SO GOOD

just that feeling in the beginning, you try to be honest and direct and open with him but he isn't invested enough, can't put himself out there, and you back off and try to keep your distance

but he just becomes a SIMP and he's so obviously in love everyone is kind of cringing but you're too respectful so mammon just has to fucking suffer because even being your friend feels like more than he deserves but he wants wants wants so bad,

riGHT RIGHT RIGHT CORVIAN UR ON THE MONEYYYYYY with dia just. hnnnnng.

the game really likes to build lucifer up as coveted, desirable, basically the 'best' and most attractive character. diavolo's been pining for him for literal millennia.

like, because dia couldn't get him, he's going to settle for you? are you supposed to believe he's over luci? you're a human, you're a nobody compared to him, how could you ever compare?

just hnnnng. diavolo giving himself problems that no amount of power will dig him out of. there are SO MANY ways it could go and it's honestly just. delicious.

and the angst with barbatos,,, literally top tier and tbh like whenever i think of any barb shipping content in a serious context it's what comes up. will barb's greatest loyalty always be to dia? why is he like that? what would it take to change him?

hnnng. just. AUGH. IT'S SO ANGSTY AND SO FULL OF POTENTIAL AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR CHEERING ME ON!! It's so sweet to hear ppl liking it because,, god does the idea get my engines going aaAAAAAAHHHH hnnnnghhhhh <3

[bizarrelovesquare]

Have you ever collected any American Girl dolls? I never did, but I used to get the catalogue. Their furniture is so cool and well made and it FASCINATES MEEEEEE

ignore that I'm answering this way late and after I already posted one of my dolls

I just started collecting them over the past few months! I'd been interested in them for a long time though. It's kind of a long story. I used to get the catalogs from 2002 to 2014(? somewhere around there? it was definitely a long time and I was legally an adult when they finally stopped coming) and I would look through it cover to cover multiple times, imagining what I would do if I had every doll, outfit, accessory, and furniture piece that I wanted. The names of particular items are still ingrained in my mind to this day (makes ebay searching very easy, lol). In elementary school, I read nearly all of the AG historical books from the library. I finally got a doll in 2007, Julie when she was first released, because I've always loved the 1970s.

However, even though I loved the doll, she initially didn't ignite that "spark" for me that I get with favorite toys, and I still don't know why. I loved her style, loved her story, still loved looking at the catalogs, but I just didn't know how to bond with her. My theory is that I was just at an awkward age (I was almost 12) and was transitioning from playing with dolls in a kiddie way to playing with them in older collector ways, but since I wasn't used to having an AG doll, it wasn't as simple as my never-faltering career as a Barbie collector since age two. I did try making more clothes for her a few times, and they were good for my age at the time, but I made mistakes and that frustrated me. She kinda just sat there and I eventually stored her away.

Fast forward to August 2022!! I go to an annual doll expo near me, and this is the first year they were able to have it since 2019, so I was stoked to be back and explore what was for sale. One table had some AG clothes for sale that I recognized, and seeing them in person instead of on a page was surreal, getting to see the actual size and quality, and I was like "...Okay...I could totally get into this...actually I DEFINITELY want something American Girl before I leave this place today." I walked around a bit more, and on another table stood my lookalike doll, Just Like You #23, one of the first AG dolls I ever wanted (along with Molly and Samantha). I stopped in my tracks and said "I've wanted this doll since I was a kid," and the lady behind the table says, "Well now's your chance!" I'm debating at this point, because the tag says $55 and I wasn't planning on spending that much on a singular item, but this is a piece of Evie history and I'm so drawn towards this doll, how can I not get her, and the lady must have read my mind, because she goes, "How much is she...55, no that's not right, you can have her for $30!" and now I'm about to start crying, and I'm like YES I'LL TAKE HER!

So I got my Just Like You doll, brought her home and curled her hair to match mine (AG why u no curly hair in the 2000s???), and I was instantly OBSESSED. The thing about me is that I can't love a thing without becoming a collector, so I had an urge to find even more. I discovered that they can go for pretty decent prices on the secondhand market, and I made a whole mental list of dolls/outfits/etc that I eventually want to find.

About a month ago was when I got the idea to make my custom Marinette doll; since she's such an adorable character, I thought she'd translate well to an AG doll. I spent weeks searching resell sites for the perfect doll, and I finally came across a Just Like You #30 that had had her eyes swapped to blue ones, and I knew she was the one. A few days before she arrived in the mail, I dug in our storage boxes for my Julie doll, and I brought her back into my room. This time, I felt the connection. Maybe all these years, I just needed some friends for her <3

I have three American Girl dolls sitting in front my bed now, and they're perfect for me. I'm looking forward to many future adventures, making custom clothes for them with my adult sewing skills, and adding even more of them to the family. So, that's been my journey into AG collecting!

[kookie-doughs]

Beta Tester

Kozume Kenma X Reader

-YN LN is a popular mangaka

Chapter 14: Drubk

With everyone who took part in the bet waltzing towards the buffet table you were left alone with strangers.

As awkward as it is being stuck in this situation you couldn't be bothered as you've almost won 500 bucks.

"Not slowing down at all huh?" Atsumu smirked.

"Not until I get that 500 bucks, nu-uh." You replied downing your glass.

You've halfed your 2nd bottle already. The stooges had gone to find the largest champagne they could for your third and last.

As far as they know... You don't show slightest bit of drunken actions or slurs. Not that you do those. Like what Tendou and Akaashi said, when you're drunk you do something stupid once.

"I worry about you. Too much alcohol is said to be incredibly bad for one's health."

"I heard alcohol makes you fat..."

"Slow down a bit YN-San."

"I shouldn't have went here if you'll just barf everywhere."

The worried replies of the volleyball players(minus Atsumu) was ignored as you poured your last drop of your 2nd champagne bottle.

"Fucking hell... Those Lil shits better bring me my last one. Momma needs a new tablet!!"

Finally downing your last glass you stood up. Stretching you went to the tables on your left.

"Mr. Jisei, right?" You asked the man with messy black hair and petting a cat. He smiled seeing you and gave his cat to the girl beside him who sighed. The long haired male beside her started sneezing.

"Ms. L/N, congratulations to your game. The investment that Sakujo had begged was indeed worth it." He smiled.

The thought of Sakujo begging this man was permanent in your mind, good and bad reasons.

"I'm glad you think so." You nodded. "Jinko, it's nice to see you again."

"Likewise Y/N! By the way, this is Heiwa my wife!" She grinned pulling the girl with the cat beside her. The cat hopped from Heiwa and landed on the Korean male.

It was a mess, that you chose to get away from. With the silver haired actor's ruckus, you figured it's a hint to get away from them. And thought of food.

Greeting some people and thanking them for the "congratulations" they've said, you went back to your now empty table. Setting down the food you've gathered you sat alone at your table and started eating.

"Lonely..." You pouted.

Standing up you turned to the table on your right. Kenma, Goshiki's date and Kuroo's date were the only ones that remained at the table. Seeing the free spot beside Kenma, you brought your plate and sat beside him.

Kenma was hunched over focused on a game, most likey to be PPM. Feeling your pressence he turned to face you and grimaced.

Flipping Kenma off, you faced the two women. "Hey! I'm Y/N! I hope the party's to your liking!"

"Alisa Haiba, I came with Kuroo." The long haired girl smiled. "This is great! The food is amazing!"

"I know! Goshiki got seconds!" The other girl exclaimed. "I'm Maiko by the way! Maiko Yonezawa, I came with Goshiki."

You sighed and leaned on Kenma who pushed you away with a scowl.

"I came with this hermit." You frowned poking him.

"Y/N!!!" Kuroo came back holding three trays of food. "They have desserts! A lot! Holy shit this is the best place!"

"For me?" Alisa's eyes shown at the plates Kuroo held. "Hell no. Get your own. You got two hands don't you?" Alisa's face dropped. "Your date is also eating flounder at the buffet table not bothering to get out of there."

The two girls sighed and stood up to leave.

Kuroo winked at me, "I want desserts!"

Kenma glared at the rooster. "You haven't eaten your food yet."

"Your point?" He stood up and left.

Seeing that you were alone with Kenma you flopped beside him. "Kenmaaaaa..."

"Shut up."

"Kenmaaaaaaaaa..." Pulling him closer to you and making sure he won't be able to escape your grasp no matter how much he strugged.

With a frown he turned to you. "Let me go." He hissed.

"Pspsps..." You whispered petting his head.

"What the fuck? Stop it." He tried swating your hand away but failed. "Let me go! Stop it's annoying! Are you drunk or something?"

"No I am not drunk. I only drank champange you can't even smell a drop of alcohol from me, I am perfectly sober."

"Then let me go."

"You can still play..."

"No I can't let me go or I'll break your arms." He glared.

Looking at him you smirked. "You're cute when you're annoyed.

Without thinking you leaned closer and... "Chuu~~!" You wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him closer, his soft lips against yours. After a few minutes you pulled away proud of yourself.

Kenma sat there a frozen at his spot. His face slowly started heating up.

He stood up and left without words.

"Kenma not again!" With a groan you flopped on the table. "Friking...Pudding..."

"You ready for bottle 3?!" You turned behind and saw the friends who left you holding a champange bottle at least 2 liters large.

"Bring it bitch!" You smirked.

Sakujo set down a glass and Tendou poured.

"I wonder what stupid thing she'll do."

"I bet it's tea so hot that the media would want to buy it.

~

You've drank about 1/4 of your bottle. Kenma hadn't return since he left 30 minutes or so ago. As you were about to drink your glass. The sight and memory of Kenma and your kiss came. You spit out your drink at the now very disgusted Akaashi.

"What the fuck?" They all asked you.

With your face so red you ran to the bathroom.

Previous | Masterlist | Next

Fuuuuuckkkkkkk meeeeee!! I can't write UwU.

Shit keeps getting worse. I'm just trying to get to the romance fast lmao

Who gon take u hom noe?

Guess ur walkin

-kookie-doughs

Taglist?

@gayer-than-the-gayest-gay @synx-ed @normalisthenewnorm @0majuh0 @leachann @nikanikabitch @almondeupeach @immxnty @mer-majesty @yamayoomi @simpingoveranime-men @lostmarimoismyhubby @mariishat

[forkanna]

[AO3] [WATTPAD]

"Come on, don't be mad," Rise insisted for the hundredth time as they waited for the train to come through. They had been there for a few minutes, bags in hands and feet impatient. At least they a few CDs apiece, and a poster that Rise hoped would do for Chie's gift, even though it was Bruce Lee's Enter The Dragon instead of Sonny-Sammy-whoever.

"Why not? My feelings are just as valid as yours."

"And it wasn't my fault! Like, you heard me try to tell him I didn't want any attention!"

"False modesty. I mean, I bet you say shit like that all the time, just so you look like a precious little princess."

The train going the opposite way whipped past, and she watched Ai's pink dress flutter for a moment until the din died down. Then she said in a quiet voice, "You want to be left alone? I will leave you alone. I just don't think that's what you really want."

"You were going to ditch me anyway. What does Risette want with some small-town teen queen when she's Japan's teen queen? It would happen sooner or later."

"Do you want me to apologise for your friend getting star-struck?"

"He was my friend first. And I mean, not that we're close, just that he's someone I-"

"Because I won't."

Ai blinked a couple of times before turning to look at her properly. "What did you just say?"

"I'm not going to apologise," Rise repeated firmly, her own features severe and intense now. "Remember me telling you I didn't even submit my first idol contest application myself? I never asked for all this. I have enjoyed it, sure — who wouldn't? But it's not 'my fault' people go crazy for celebs. Besides, I even tried to tell that guy not to make a big deal, to just let me hang out with my friend, and he kept fangirling anyway. My input clearly doesn't matter, so I am taking zero responsibility for him being an otaku. Do you understand?"

The other girl looked completely thunderstruck. In fact, she had no words. The train arrived shortly afterward, and they both got on without speaking, grasping for overhead straps as the doors slid shut.

It wasn't until they got off at the Yasoinaba station and Rise had started striding for the steps, feeling like a failure, that she felt her hand grasped from behind. She turned to slap whatever creep had grabbed her, but the creep was Ai, so she decided not to hit her. Yet.

"What?" No answer. Ai was too busy staring down at the space between their shoes. "Come on, it's getting late… I can still work a shift at Marukyu if you let me g-"

"I'm sorry!" she burst out, then cleared her throat to try again. "I apologise, Rise."

"What?"

"Shut up, don't make me say it again. I overreacted and I already feel stupid."

Cranking up the bubbliness to eleven, she gushed, "Oh noooo, I don't think I heard you at aaaaalllllll. What was that, Ebi-chaaaan?"

"Sh-shut UP!"

"Do you wuv meeeeee?" This time, Ai did yank her hand away and begin to stomp off down the steps, leaving a giggling Rise to chase after her.

"Like you said, have fun at Marukyu."

"You were a meanie," she told her, still laughing just a little. "I think I get to tease you a little."

"I don't like it. And I have explained why."

"Yeah. Your grade school classmates weren't teasing you, though. They were mocking you."

"Same fucking difference."

Jogging to walk side-by-side with her, despite Ai occasionally picking up speed to try and outstrip the idol, she went on, "Not really. Friends tease. Bullies mock… or sometimes hurt you physically. Did you ever get hurt like that?"

"Well… yeah, I did. But it's been a while. I mean, certainly not since elementary."

"Well that's good. I'll try not to tease you too much, but like, it's not going to work if I can't tease you. Because friends do that, and leaving that out would make this kinda fake. Right?"

Ai raised an eyebrow and glanced over at her. "I… do not follow that logic at all. You're weird."

"I'm not," she giggled, leaning down to smile up at her. "C'mon, it's fun. And I promise-promise I'll try to keep an eye on it so I don't make you feel really bad, and you might even get used to it. And that might help you with that 'everybody's tone is mocking' thing you feel."

"So let me get this straight. You think by teasing me, you're doing me a favour by desensitising me to people being jerks?"

"Right!"

"And that's 'friendship'? Putting me through that gauntlet?"

"Yup! I'm pretty great, right? My generosity is limitless!"

Finally, the grumpy girl laughed as they got to the bus stop, plopping down on the bench with their bags next to their feet. "Whatever. You're insane."

"Maybe. Or maybe I'm amazing and it just looks insane."

"Two sides of the same coin."

"So… I didn't wanna ask in front of 'the expert', but what was all that in the CD store? You two were off in your own little world there."

Ai's face was already flushed from being annoyed earlier, and all that power-walking. But it definitely didn't get any less rosy as she fidgeted, playing with the hem of her dress. "That's… it's stupid."

"Might be. But we're friends, we have to share stupid interests and stuff."

"You're really starting to be a pain with this 'friend' thing all the time." But Rise was patient. And eventually… "It's… something left over from my mother."

"Your mother?"

"Yes. She, um, she used to really love those old city pop singers; had so many records. Her fave was Mariya Takeuchi; just had really fond memories from her childhood, and she used to play them for me all the time."

A sinking feeling settled into the pit of her stomach. "Your mom… is she, u-um…?"

"Hm? No, she's alive. Probably." Ai looked extremely conflicted for a moment before heaving a deep sigh. "She moved out at the beginning of last year."

"Moved out? Like… a divorce?"

"Not officially. Yet. But it seems like it's going to be a matter of time." When Rise opened her mouth to reply, she was quick to cut her off. "Look. After my dad got rich overnight, I wasn't the only one who changed. We all did. But my mother seemed to resent it, even though we were all different afterward — including her hypocritical ass. Said she couldn't stay in the house with her b- with us, because we were like strangers now. And I…"

Rise gave her a few seconds to finish the thought. When she didn't, she reached over with her free hand to take up Ai's in a gentle grip. That seemed to encourage her to continue.

"It's my fault. For changing too much, for no longer being the child she raised. And I got so angry with her, said a lot of things I can never take back… I drove her away. Like I tried to do to you. So you see? Might as well ditch me now before I treat you like shit one day."

As if she hadn't already. But saying that was not productive, so she focused on the subject at hand. "Hey… I don't think that's right." When the other girl began to sigh, she pushed on, "No, listen. She's your mom, right? She's the adult — her and your dad, I mean. Of course if she's telling you she doesn't like how you have changed because you're growing up, like, you're gonna get mad. She's supposed to be the one who can figure out you're just mad and you'll get over it, or whatever."

"That sounds great, but I don't think it works that way in the real world."

"Maybe not this time, but it's how it's supposed to work. So don't go around hating on yourself for something she needed to do better."

Finally seeming to realize her hand was being held, she turned to blink at her new friend, brow furrowed. "I don't… know… I guess I wasn't expecting you to be this… genuinely…"

"Awesome?" she attempted with a small smile as the bus arrived. "Pretty? Hot as hell?"

"Nice. Even to a huge bitch like me."

Once they had both paid their fare and chosen a seat in the back, Rise whispered, "Listen. We're going to have to get used to each other. But we should probably get to know each other if we really want a shot at that." She chewed on her thoughts for a moment as they rode into Inaba. "Mmmm, did you know I actually really like helping out at Marukyu?"

"Hadn't really thought about it." After a second, she relented, "Okay, I guess I thought it was just some kind of PR stunt. But don't read too much into that."

"You're fine," she giggled as she snaked her arm around Ebihara's elbow, ignoring the fresh twitch it earned her. "But yeah, it's probably weird, but I actually really enjoy frying up the ganmodoki myself. Getting my hands dirty, helping clean up, straighten up, checking on my grandma…"

Though Ai had been ramrod straight like a tin soldier ever since they linked arms, she slowly began to relax the more she listened to Rise. "Well yeah, I guess I get that. She's family and you probably missed her while you were off dazzling the world."

"The world? Please. I mean, I do have a handful of fans in Korea and China, but none any further than that. I'm not that special."

"You are. They just can't see it past the language barrier."

"Awwwww…"

"I regret everything," she grumbled. But of course, Rise was still giggling as they slipped off the bus and onto the sidewalk, a lot closer to their sleepy little city.

"Hey, can I come over and listen to my CD at your place? I don't have a CD player anymore."

"Then… why did you buy- never mind. You probably have even more disposable income than I do."

Rolling her eyes, she bumped Ai just enough so that they both stumbled the tiniest bit. "Dork! I only accepted because he was so happy to be doing us a favor. And I figured hey, I might as well pick something I wanted instead of just a couple of random CDs I didn't care about. These are souvenirs now."

"Ah yes. Souvenirs of the time you had to put up with a raging harpy."

"Wow! Like, you really only have two modes, don't you? 'Meanie' and 'Depression Fest 2012'."

But apparently, that had been the wrong thing to say. Rise was just trying to tease like she always did; it was part of her job. The more she teased, the more she played, the more fun people had. The more fun they had, the better mood they were in. The better their mood, the more likely they were to capitulate to whatever the terms were — those of her manager, or herself. And it had all worked out, because she wanted friends so badly and everyone around seemed to become her friend when she treated them that way. Even if the friendships didn't last.

But this time, it silenced Ai so completely that she found herself checking on her every few seconds as they walked along. What did she say? Had it really been that much worse than anything else so far? Eventually, she wound up stopping to pull her into a gentle hug.

"God… it's not- you don't have to do that."

"I'm sorry. You know I'm playing with you, right? Just playing! But if I'm really hurting you…"

Ai shook her head and dropped her bags so she could cling to her, burying her face in those mauve locks. "Shhh, you're fine. I… you don't have to do this. Any of it. But you're not screwing up as bad as you think you are, I'm just a bitch. Sorry for all these constant reminders."

"It's okay." Especially because Ai was so warm. This hug nearly undid all of the pain and strife they had put each other through over the course of a scant few total hours they had spent in each other's company.

And Rise didn't seem to be the only one who thought as much. Those arms tightened on her back, practically clinging to her as they soaked up each other's warmth. Why did this feel so right? They were all wrong for each other as friends, if all their bickering was any indication, yet a simple hug was like a dream come true. Ai smelled so good, expensive perfume mingling with soft skin just on the other side of that dress.

Even though the lace on Ai's choker was tickling her nose. Eventually, that made it twitch, and then she giggled as she shivered in an attempt to suppress a reaction.

"What?" Ai asked, confused.

"The lace tickled. You wear that thing all the time and I don't know why." It prompted a quiet sigh from the taller girl, so Rise skipped backward, hands in the small of her back. Maintaining a high energy level for their day might distract her from whatever demons she was battling internally. "C'mon! I'll race you to Junes!"

"Wha- hey, wait a minute, what about our bags? You don't expect me to carry all this!"

Maybe part of her motivation for taking off running and leaving Ai to carry all of their purchases was to instill a little more humility in the prissy girl. Or maybe she just wanted to do something carefree. Either way, her friend did scoop up the bags before taking off running after her.

                                                    ~ o ~

"NOOOOO, give it back!"

"We've had enough of this weird thing!" Chie cackled as she ran away with Teddie's bear mascot head, holding it aloft while the blond boy himself chased after her. Rise leaned back in the food court chair and laughed her head off. Yes, she knew the head meant a lot more to him than just part of some costume; they all knew that, except for Ebihara. But he had been up to his usual mischief, saying he was going to "score" with Yukiko simply because she let him have some of her french fries. He obviously spent a little too much time listening to Yosuke.

"You guys are too much," Kanji sighed, face-palming as he leaned heavily against the table. But he didn't do anything to stop Chie and Yosuke throwing it back and forth, either.

"I have to say, this is a bizarre group of people to have come together," Ai commented as she sipped at her smoothie. Maybe she still wasn't ordering a ton of junk food, but she had insisted that a smoothie was really "cheating on her diet" considering that before she had met Narukami, she probably would have ordered a diet soda and no more. Their bags were stashed under their chairs until they headed home later — except for the poster. That was safely tucked beneath Yukiko's chair, once all the excessive bowing and thanking was over with, and Rise had refused to accept any money from her. She was just happy to help out her friends.

"I suppose so," Naoto conceded with a sage nod, hand at her chin as always. "From the outside looking in, it would seem strange to anyone."

"So how did you all meet, then? Bizarre multi-grade class project?"

There was definitely a pause. None of them were quite sure what excuse to come up with; only that they had to think of something to tell her that didn't involve supernatural hijinks. That would only send the average person running for the hills.

"Remember the Midnight Channel?" Yukiko began.

"Yukiko!" Kanji blustered. But she forged ahead, undeterred, and Rise felt her thighs clench beneath the tabletop. Moment of truth…

"Well, that murderer who killed Miss Yamano and the others? We knew he was somehow using the TVs to announce his next victims. Not only that, but my own kidnapping made it impossible to ignore for all of us; myself, obviously, but Chie and the others couldn't just wait for someone else to put a stop to it once our friends were becoming targets. We started investigating on our own since the police didn't seem to have any leads. And when Naoto-kun came to town and began to work with the police directly, we all sort of… found each other, thanks to that common goal."

Wow. Ai wasn't the only one dumbfounded; the others at the table found themselves impressed that she had come up with such a believable almost-truth on the spur of the moment like that.

"Th-that's amazing," Ai finally said, still blinking rapidly to try and dispel her shock. "I didn't know the rest of you were also detectives."

"Not very good ones," Rise provided with a little awkward laugh. "But all of us putting our heads together, we were finally able to figure out it was that creep Adachi. The power of teamwork!"

"Hey, you don't have to keep calling her 'Naoto-kun'," Kanji suddenly said with a slight frown at Yukiko. "We know she's a chick now, don't be disrespectful."

While Yukiko was looking regretful and beginning to bow to offer an apology, Naoto smiled and patted the tall boy on the bicep. "It's fine. In fact, I'm much more comfortable with that than I ever could be with something feminine like 'Nao-chan'. Just doesn't suit me."

Even as Rise was calling out "NAO-CHAAAAAAAAAAN" in a loud, carrying voice and throwing her arms around the stoic girl, prompting some flustered shovings, Ai was smiling across at the junior detective prince. "Naoto-kun it is. Obviously we want you to be comfortable."

Both the sentiment and the smile were so unexpected from Ai Ebihara that everyone stopped to look at her. After a second or two, she cleared her throat and went back to sipping at the dregs of her smoothie.

"Thank you, Ebihara-san," Naoto finally managed as Rise dropped back into her seat.

"Of course. See? I'm not a cunt all the time."

"Never said you were," Rise cooed as she pinched her cheek.

"HEY! Didn't I tell you to stop getting so physical with me? My face is the real money maker and so help me…"

Things only devolved from there. Kanji was apologizing profusely for presuming too much, Naoto was trying to assure him she didn't mind either, Yukiko had lapsed into another uncontrollable giggle-fit when she noticed Chie and Yosuke had started throwing Teddie himself back and forth. And Ai… was laughing and smiling. Not much; she still looked a little out of place there, not quite sure how she fit into the group of friends.

But she was starting to. Sometimes, a modicum of progress was the best you got.

                                                    To Be Continued…

[3rinbkk]

i’m speechless-

i read this at night while listening to my 40s bucky playlist and let me tell u, i fell in love 💗

and it made me feel so much i need to highlight my favorite parts so i can read them again and again:

…revealing Bucky dressed in black from head to toe with a large bouquet of white flowers in hand. The dark colour of his suit and short hair framed his face perfectly, accentuating his clear, blue eyes and pink lips so dreamily that you had to fight the urge to reach out to check if he was real.

the way i can perfectly picture him dressed like this got me feeling dizzy 😵‍💫

"That's my girl," he winked at you, seemingly ignoring your slightly confused face as he held out the bouquet of white tulips. "These are for you."

i love tulips aaaaaa

You had never realised just exactly how high his cheekbones were, the sharpness of his angled jaw, his straight nose. He was without a doubt one of the most handsome men you'd ever laid your eyes on, but it was as if you didn't truly appreciate it until that exact moment.

GOD THIS MAN IS KILLING MEEEEEE

"Sweetheart," he drawled and licked his lips, looking as if he'd won the lottery. "I'd follow you just about anywhere..."

something i noticed about this fic and that i totally loved is the way you wrote him. i mean i love the emo version of bucky, but this- charming and sweet bucky means everything to me, the way he talks and is always smiling is just beautiful 💖

"I know everything about you, sweetheart," he winked at you with a warm smile. "- and I just thought, since you always order Mexican when you're down, I'd change it around for you; tacos should be a means of celebrating."

now this. i was dying at this part because i’m mexican and of course i loveeee tacos so the fact that he did this for her it’s just brilliant, not even tha fancy drinks can top having comfort tacos for dinner<3

"I don't know," he ran a hand through his short hair while licking his lips, "you never know when the right person's suddenly standing in front of you. I want to be ready for when that finally happens."

"Can't wait for that to happen to me," you sighed.

"Yeah... Can't wait either," he mumbled quietly and softly ran his thumb over your shoulder.

OH COME ONNN AND JUST KISS ALREADY!!!

"No," he grabbed your hand and pulled you inside to a dark room covered in heart-shaped balloons and confetti, a loud band in the corner playing peppy swing jazz for the out-of-breath-people on the dance floor. "We're going dancing!" he exclaimed happily and wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

this is gonna sound so depressing lol but u have no idea how bad i wanted to read something that involved dancing with bucky, like, i’ve dreamed about it hundreds of times!!! i read this while “My girl” was playing i was literally sobbing 😭💓

He moved his hand over your hip, dipping his fingers a little lower than he had before as he leaned in close and whispered in your ear, "I could look at you forever..."

the whole dancing scene means everything to me, how they’re just starting and admiring each other, so oblivious about their feelings, the touches and the smiling aaaaaa

NOW THE STUCKY MOMENT NOOOOO

"You used to watch the stars with Steve?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "we could sit up here for hours, imagining what our lives would be. I guess neither of us quite hit the target."

"Guess not," you grinned and caressed his leg underneath the blanket to show him that you understood. "Do you miss him?"

"Yeah, every day," Bucky nodded, "I wish you guys had met. He would've liked you."

this. i can’t even explain how bittersweet this was. like i’m happy bucky is okay with it but the fact he’s gone makes me so sad. the little memory of the two of them stargazing back then is gorgeous, i’m taking this with me, forever.

"You should've seen me," he smirked, "two arms and an undeniable boyish charm. And when I put on the uniform, they didn't stand a chance in resisting me."

40s bucky mean the entire world to me, u have no idea <3

the ride back home was so cute, i could feel butterflies on my tummy while reading it, the way he explained to her everything, and just hold her oh my god. the things i would do 😩

i’m telling u… when the key jangle part came and i realized why he told her to lock her door I LITERALLY SCREAMED AAAAAA this man knowssss what he is doing!!!!

His chest was heaving slowly, his eyes darkening as the pupils slowly drowned out the blue in his irises while he looked at you. "No keys," he concluded quietly, trying hard to fight the smile that tugged on the corners of his mouth. "Fuck me," he smiled broadly, and stepped over to you, putting his calloused palm to the side of your face where he stroked his thumb over your jawline while his lips danced enticingly close to yours.

i have no words to describe the way this part made me feel. it’s was so beautiful and powerful i was shaking of excitement, how he just went from being sweet all night to being this feral man oh god

The kiss was short and sweet, but it didn't take Bucky two seconds before he let out a satisfied groan and pulled you closer. "Fuck, sweetheart!" he whispered with a breath heavier than ever before. "You have no idea how long I've waited for this," he growled and put his hand in the back of your neck, his lips urging you to open your mouth so he could slip his tongue past your teeth and into your wet mouth.

this was so sensual and tender and hot and sweet-

He gave out a sensual groan when your tongues finally found each other and happily trailed his metal fingers up your side; touching the exposed skin of your thigh, grazing over the curve of your hip, massaging your waistline through the soft fabric of your red dress.

His hands were snaking around your stomach, his palms pressing you closer to his pelvis, and he leaned in close and whispered in your ear. "Sweetheart, I want to take you out again..." he pulled your earlobe between your teeth.

"Tonight wasn't play-pretend for me..." he whispered, "I want you. All of you. Not just on missions and during training sessions at the gym - all the time."

OH MY GOD IM ON KNEES FOR THISSS.

i know i practically put everything you wrote in here but it’s just amazing. i’m love with every little detail of this fic, again the way you wrote him made me fall even more in love and god, i want a best friend like him so bad!!! thank u for this wonderful story, i love it dearly 💖

hiiii, firts of all i want to say how amazing your stories are, you are honestly one of my favorite writers!! and i don’t know if you take requests but if you ever run out of ideas i’ve thought about a short story where Bucky tries to show the reader how it was like to date in the 1900s (he writes her a letter, invites her to a date with a letter etc.) because the reader asked him one time what it was like back then haha

The Key Jangle (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Story summary: Sick and tired of your many recent bad dates, you’re dreading yet another Valentine’s Day alone. When Bucky offers to show you what a night out is supposed to look like according to him, you get to experience what it’s like to date your best friend.

Words: 9.3K (it got out of hand, sorry!)

Note: Hi anon! Thank you so much for your sweet words and your lovely request! I hope it's okay that I didn't follow it strictly; I just sort of ran along with your idea of Bucky being old-fashioned and sweet, and took it from there. Anyway, this is my shot at a sweet, fluffy Valentine's Day fic before I enter the spring of breaking Bucky’s heart. Hope you enjoy.

Warnings: None. Pure fluff and slight banter.

Bucky Barnes Masterlist

February 13th, noon

You had spent the first part of the morning of February 13th in bed sweating and grieving over the horrible night before. The smell of your latest bad Tinder date hang like a stench over your bed, drenching you in the cheap cologne of the man who online had seemed charming and nice, but in real life best could be described as blatantly obnoxious and terribly self-centred. Exactly where the smell came from, you did not know; you hadn't even brought him home - nor touched him! Hadn't even made it through the main course before his rude behaviour had finally become so much that you had grabbed your coat and left without bidding him goodbye.

It had definitely been one of the worst dates you'd had in a long time, but still, the prospect of yet another Valentine's Day alone hang on the back of your tongue like a thick musk, drowning you in the disappointment of your date not being boyfriend material after all.

Slightly frustrated with yourself and your apparently relentless belief that one day you'd find true love, you buried your head in between the bedsheets and curled up your body, readying yourself for yet another lonely Sunday with nothing to keep you company but your comfort TV show on repeat.

It wasn't until well past noon you were ripped out of your vegetative state by a loud knock on your bedroom door. You heard how the hinges creaked open before you'd even had a chance to reply, but you weren't in the mood to face whoever had decided to disturb you and stayed with your back towards them.

"There you are!" Bucky's voice bounced through the walls as he took in the blob lying underneath a mountain of white bedlinen, a small foot sticking out at the corner. "I've been looking all over the compound for you, have you just been lying in here all day?"

"Yeah," you muttered in a bored tone of voice, your eyes still fixed on the TV screen in front of you.

"Hmm... I guess it's safe to assume that last night's Tinder adventure didn't exactly go as planned then?"

"No, it went perfectly fine, he's actually under here with me," you mumbled and heard how it made Bucky chuckle warmly behind you. "He's just a little shy."

"Well, tell him to come on out!" he chipped in amusement, "I want to meet the man who was finally worthy enough to be invited into your bed."

Slowly, you turned around to face your best friend who was leaning casually up against the doorframe with his big, bulky arms crossed over his chest as his eyes twinkled with amusement.

"Okay, I'm alone in here," you admitted in a small voice and took in the large grin that split his face in two.

"Oh, I never would've guessed," he chuckled and stepped inside your room, closing the door to the hallway behind him, "- what happened?" he sat down next to you on the bed.

"I don't wanna talk about it," you groaned and directed your attention back to your TV, trying to ignore his satisfied smirk and prying eyes.

"Aw come on! You know your Tinder adventure is my favourite serial," he chuckled and searched your face with excited eyes, "how big of a train wreck was it? On a scale from pet-snake Larry to Paul the Magician."

"Barnes..." you sighed again, sending him a stern look as you took in his amused smirk, "I'm happy you find my terrible love life so amusing but I'm really not in the mood to joke about it today, okay?"

He furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his head to the side, his face suddenly laced with concern. "Sweetheart, are you okay?" he gently touched his hand to the top of your duvet and let out a low, dark growl, "- he didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, it's fine," you assured him with a shake of your head and saw how Bucky immediately drew a breath of relief. "He was a douchebag but that's it... I just don't see the appeal in my failing love life when tomorrow is the most romantic day of the year..."

"Since when do you care about Valentine's Day?" he arched an eyebrow at your statement. "Last year you said it was stupid...?"

"I've always cared," you whined and sent him a pained look, "- I've just never had anyone special to celebrate it with."

"That's because you have a way of always ending up with the douchebags..." he shrugged matter-of-factly. "You're setting yourself up for failure time and time again."

"It's hard to be picky," you let out a tired groan, "- there are literally no good men back in the city."

"No good men?" He repeated in mock offence, "oh, I beg to differ! There's a pretty decent guy sitting in front of you right now!" he touched his palm to his heart, pretending he was hurt.

"...What are you saying?" you felt yourself smile for the first time that day as you scanned his curled-up face, "you want to take me out now?"

"Yeah!" his entire face lit up and you let out a laugh at his cute smile. "What's so funny about that?" He poked you in the side with a chuckle, "come on, let me show you what a proper date is supposed to look like! Wouldn't it be nice to actually have a decent night out for once?!"

"Don't be ridiculous..." you rolled your eyes at him, "- what I want is something that might actually advance to more than just a story I tell my teammate to keep him amused."

"Sweetheart, I'm serious," he held up his hands in surrender. "Come on, let me show you a good time tomorrow! My treat!"

You hesitated. A fake date with your best friend wasn't exactly what you had in mind for the most romantic night of the year.

"Oh don't look so excited to go out with me!" He chuckled loudly, his gaze never leaving yours.

"I'm sorry," you smiled, taking in the way his enticing metal hand whirred in front of your eyes as his fingers slightly twitched before falling down in his lap. "It's not that I don't want to do something with you," you fumbled to find the edge of the duvet so you could sneak out your hand to grab the cold vibranium fingers splayed over his muscular thigh. "- it's just not really what I had in mind for tomorrow."

"Hey you're the one who wanted a proper date for Valentine's Day, right?" He smiled softly and gently squeezed your fingers, "I'm offering you one. Come on, what's the harm? We always have fun, right?"

"We do," you nodded, thinking over his proposition, and slowly realising that a night out with him definitely beat another bad Tinder date. "Yeah, alright," you ended up smiling with a hesitant nod, "you have me convinced. It's a date."

"It's a date!" he agreed excitedly and padded your thigh before quickly jumping from the bed, leaving you cold and alone, "you won't regret it!"

"Hey! Where are you going?" You lifted your head from your pillow to take in the significant bounce in his step that he suddenly carried himself with. "Come back!"

"Can't," he spun around and smiled broadly at you, "I have some serious planning to do! I don't want to end up being one of the horrible dates you tell your teammate about!" he winked at you before practically skipping out the room.

February 14th, afternoon

For some reason you couldn't quite place, you'd been nervous about your night out with Bucky all day and it was weirding you out! You'd done plenty of stuff just the two of you before - dinners, movies, drinks - but something about going out with him on a night reserved exclusively for lovers, had you feeling warm and fuzzy as you waited for him to swing by your room to pick you up.

You hadn't seen him since he'd coaxed you into spending Valentine’s together, but he had texted you earlier to 'please wear the red dress' and now you were standing in front of your mirror, eyes hesitantly scanning the tight cocktail dress that was normally reserved for particularly special dates, wondering how Bucky so easily had managed to convince you to put it on for him.

Completely lost in thought, wondering what it would be like dating Bucky, you were slightly startled when there was a sudden knock on your door.

"Come in," you quickly scurried away from the mirror, trying to look as if you hadn't just been fidgety about your special date-night attire and the prospect of a very romantic night out with your best friend - fake or not.

The door opened slowly, revealing Bucky dressed in black from head to toe with a large bouquet of white flowers in hand. The dark colour of his suit and short hair framed his face perfectly, accentuating his clear, blue eyes and pink lips so dreamily that you had to fight the urge to reach out to check if he was real.

"Jesus," he immediately whistled, his entire body tensing as his eyes travelled between your face and hips. "You look amazing!" he said sincerely and ran a hand through the stubbles on his chin, looking slightly taken aback. "I mean... wow!"

"Stop that," you laughed and stepped aside so he could enter your room, "you've seen me in this dress a million times before."

"Yeah," he chuckled and licked his lips, turning around so he could admire you again, "- and you always look amazing, but it hits a little different to know that you're wearing it for me."

"I'm not wearing it for you," you lifted your eyebrows and shot him a dead-pan look, fighting hard to stop the smile that threatened to spring free on your face. "I only put it on because you told me to. I expect there's a reason for us to be dressed so formally," you gestured to his black attire.

"Aw come on," he took a step closer and sent you a cute little pout, "- just let me have one small, tiny win. Tell me you put it on just for me!"

He was smelling heavenly, and he looked terribly cute as he charmingly grinned at you.

"You're insufferable, Barnes," you couldn't hold back the broad smile any longer, "- alright, I put it on just for you," you slowly drawled out. "There you go - Happy?"

"Mmh," he closed his eyes and threw his head backwards with a groan so sensual you had to pretend you were shifting your weight on purpose and not because a jolt of short-lived desire had woken up every fibre in your entire nervous system. "That's my girl," he winked at you, seemingly ignoring your slightly confused face as he held out the bouquet of white tulips. "These are for you."

"You bought me flowers?" you asked with your eyebrows raised high, ignoring the burning sensation on your face. "- Really? No one's ever bought me flowers before..."

"That's what I've been saying, sweetheart," he smiled, looking oddly proud of himself, "- you're dating the wrong guys!"

"I'd say!" you gave the tulips a brief sniff before turning around to find a vase for them to fit in. "That's really sweet of you, Barnes! And on a fake date nonetheless! ...you know, it's funny, but I always pictured you as a roses man."

"Yeah, back in the forties I probably would've bought any girl roses," he sighed softly behind you, and you could almost hear the smirk in his voice as he slowly continued; "- but let's be honest, doll; you're not just any girl..."

"Is that supposed to flatter me?" you laughed as you arranged the flowers in the vase, your back still turned towards him.

"Depends on whether it's working or not."

"Weirdly enough, it is," you chuckled and turned around to face him again only to see how his eyes immediately snapped upwards to meet yours.

From the intense stare he suddenly gave you and the way he slowly licked his broadly grinning lips, you were sure he'd just had his gaze firmly placed on your ass, but you chose not to comment on it. It wasn't exactly the first time you'd caught him with his hand in the cookie jar, but it was the first time you'd felt an odd sensation of pride flow through your body at the thought.

"Do you - uh - do you want something to drink?" you tilted your head to the side, smiling at him as your eyes wandered over the fitted suit.

He was casually leaning up against the wall with his hands buried in his pockets, the confident smirk still in place. "I'm good," he lightly shook his head and pulled up his sleeve to look at his wristwatch, "actually, we should probably get going - we have reservations," he grabbed your woollen overcoat from the coat rack near the door, holding it out so you could easily slip your arms into the sleeves. "- and as much as I'd hate to cover up that beautiful dress, you should probably put this on or I'll be having dinner with an icicle."

"Yeah? What are we doing?" you laughed and gratefully turned your back towards him so he could pull the jacket up your shoulders.

"I'm not gonna say," he teased behind you, the excited smile evident in his voice. "It's a secret!"

"A fake date complete with secret activities?" you laughed and slowly turned towards him again. "I gotta say; I'm impressed, Barnes!"

By pure instinct, you reached up and adjusted the Windsor knot below the collar of his shirt, accidentally staring directly into his beautiful, blue gaze. His breathing picked up at your touch, the muscles surrounding his big doe eyes completely relaxed as he took you in, his wide-blown pupils darting back and forth between your irises.

"Tonight's all about impressing you, darling," he muttered slowly, his Adam's apple bouncing enticingly in his throat as your fingers gave an involuntary twitch atop his sternum.

"Well..." you carefully took a step backwards and gently removed your hands from his chest under the pretence you were busy brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face. "- You're succeeding."

Bucky seemed to recover from the intimate moment between you a lot quicker than you did and sent you his usual charming smirk with the tongue darting out between his teeth to lick his lips. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah," you muttered, still slightly flustered as you grabbed your purse and keys.

"Remember to lock up," he sent you a wink. “Can’t have you come back home to find your door unlocked.”

"Of course," you nodded and turned the key before dumping the bundle down in your coat pocket. "Alright. Good to go," you smiled at him.

"Great," he put his hand on the small of your back, leading you away from your room and towards the steel elevators at the end of the hallway.

Under normal circumstances, you were pretty sure you'd be blabbering away, trying to guess what he had planned for tonight, but right now, all you could sense were the large fingers moving over your lower back, the touch so affectionate and intimate that you felt your cheeks go warm again as you involuntarily leaned into it. Silently, you prayed that Bucky wouldn't suddenly turn his head to look at you and realise how his foreign touch had made you slightly giddy.

"You're being quiet," he concluded after a few seconds of silence as the elevator zoomed downwards.

"Just excited for tonight," you managed to mumble, your voice weirdly thick as he started stroking his thumb over a small area of your lower spine, sending you a happy sideways glance.

The electronic panel of the elevator announced your arrival at the bottom floor of the building with a loud ding, and Bucky pressed in on your back, excitedly urging you to move through the steel doors. "Right over here," he chipped happily and lead you to a dark corner of the parking lot where his motorcycle was parked.

"We're riding your Harley?" you arched an eyebrow, taking in the large machine in front of you.

"Yep," he grinned and handed you a helmet.

"- the exact same Harley you won't even let Sam touch...?"

"Well, you're not Sam are you?" he chuckled and swung his leg over the seat, scooting forwards to make room for you on the back of the bike.

He had his legs spread wide around the stealthy machine, his large hands wrapped tightly across the leather of the handles as he rotated the key in the ignition, making the bike rumble to life beneath him. Grinning broadly, he turned his head to look at you, the dimmed lights from the parking garage making him look dark, mysterious, and annoyingly enticing on top of his black motorcycle.

You were frozen, completely taken aback by how the image in front of you was making your mind hazy, blocking out anything but your best friend sitting wide legged and alluring only two feet away.

"Well, are you coming?" he asked slowly, causing a deep shiver to run down your spine as his voice was even huskier than normal.

"Uh - Yeah..." It woke you from your mind-muffling trance and you quickly strapped the helmet underneath your chin and took the seat behind Bucky so he couldn't see the bafflement evident on your face.

The leather of the seat was soft and pliant against the backside of your thighs, and you easily sank into a comfortable position behind him as you wrapped your arms around his warm waist, lacing your fingers around his stomach.

"You good back there?" he sent you a smile over his shoulder, putting a reassuring hand on top of yours, affectionately stroking his thumb over your wrist.

You could feel his heavy heartbeat in his chest, the hard muscles of his stomach tensing as you wrapped your arms tighter around him, readying yourself for when he turned on the gas. "Yeah," you nodded, wondering if he too could feel the sensation of a foreign heart beating rapidly against his torso.

"Hold on tight, doll," he said huskily as he twisted the right-side handle with a roar of the bike and slowly drove out of the garage and into the night.

For the first few minutes on the road, you were completely overwhelmed by the feeling of absolute freedom that the ride brought you.

Elegantly, Bucky steered the bike through the busy streets of New York, the coloured lights of Manhattan coming closer and closer as you clung tightly to his warm body, your heart beating faster than ever against your ribcage, and you wondered if the high level of adrenaline coursing through your veins was due to the bike-ride, or the way Bucky felt against you as he easily balanced the large machine between his legs.

You rode for about thirty minutes, not stopping until you'd reached an expensive-looking building in Brooklyn Heights.

"We're eating here?" you let him help you off the bike as you looked in awe at the expensive cars parked outside.

"No, sweetheart," he chuckled and put your helmet in the compartment underneath the leather seat before pressing his hand to the small of your back again. "We're doing something far better for dinner. This is just the warm-up. Come on," he softly pushed you forwards and guided you into the lobby and towards the golden elevator at the end where he pressed the button for the top floor.

He was smiling confidently above you, moving his hand over your hips and stepping closer to your body. You were just about to let him know that you liked his touch, that he looked more handsome than ever, but the elevator doors suddenly slid open at the designated floor, taking away your privacy.

"After you, sweetheart," Bucky cleared his throat and let his hand fall to his side, making your body feel weirdly naked without his firm touch.

The place he'd taken you was a prohibition-themed bar complete with gold ornaments, checkerboard tiles and coffered wood ceilings. The atmosphere was warm and romantic, every mahogany table occupied by anticipating lovers holding hands and sipping expensive-looking cocktails.

Bucky made sure to walk close to you as you made your way through the sitting crowd, and you felt a sense of relief wash over you when his fingers occasionally brushed over your dress as he lead you to a table near one of the tall floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the East River.

"Wow Buck," you murmured as you sat down and took in the romantic view before you; how the skyscrapers on the other side of the river rose calmly against the pink evening sky. "This is amazing!"

"Yeah, I was hoping we'd get here in time to catch the sunset," he smiled and confidently leaned back in his chair, his eyes darting between you and the beautiful view outside. "...Would you like a drink?" He asked softly and handed you a heavy leather-inbound cocktail card.

"Thanks," you brushed your fingers over his as you accepted the menu from his hand and had to suppress the urge to let them linger. You only briefly managed to catch the way his chest heaved in anticipation as a breath hitched in your throat, your gaze turned towards the card in your lap.

"Fuck, Bucky!" you let your eyes wander down the list of beverages, "- this is crazy expensive!"

Bucky let out a heart-warming laugh that had your cheeks go so warm that you forced yourself to firmly keep your eyes on the list of drinks in front of you so he wouldn't notice how he kept causing reactions in you. "It's okay, sweetheart," he chuckled, "just pick something you like and don't look at the prices. My treat, remember?"

Slowly, you looked back up at his amused smile, a mild look of shock evident on your face. "What? No! You know I can't let you do that!" You gasped, "It'll be a fortune - and Buck, this isn't even a real date?!"

The words had barely escaped you before the smirk slipped from his face. Trying not to let the disappointment seep through him, he pressed his lips tightly together as he looked at you, his hand immediately going through his hair, slicking it back. "Come on," he sighed briefly and leaned in, forcing out a stiff smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. "Just pretend... please - just for tonight, okay? Let me spoil you," he pleaded quietly, nervously licking his lips.

You almost protested. Almost insisted on paying your own half, but something about the way he was looking at you told you that it wasn't up for discussion - that he had wanted to do this for quite some time.

"Alright," you ended up sighing while taking in his determined face. "Thank you for doing this for me."

"Anything for you," he nodded and sent you a cute smile before turning his gaze back to the menu in front of him. "So... drinks! What are you having?" he smiled softly, his eyes briefly skirting over your face again. "I think I'll go with the Macallan fifteen - How about you?”

"Am I supposed to take a scotch as well?"

"No, sweetheart," Bucky chuckled warmly, "you can have whatever you like!"

"I have sovereignty? Well, this already beats half the dates I’ve been on this year!“ you laughed and danced your eyes over the list of cocktails. "I'll have the Tequila Martini then."

"Tequila Martini for the lady," he winked at you and left for the bar with a certain self-assured swagger in his step you hadn't seen before. He was carrying himself differently than normal, almost as if he was proud to have your eyes on him, and you silently wondered if he was always like this on dates; so confident and enticing that the people he asked out couldn't tear their eyes away from him.

He was standing with his broad back turned towards you, his legs spread confidently apart as he put his weight on his right foot and grabbed the attention of the bartender with a raised hand and a charming smile. After he’d placed your order, he slowly turned around and sent you a blinding smile accompanied by a wink, making your heart immediately picked up its pace.

You had never realised just exactly how high his cheekbones were, the sharpness of his angled jaw, his straight nose. He was without a doubt one of the most handsome men you'd ever laid your eyes on, but it was as if you didn't truly appreciate it until that exact moment.

He sent you a stomach-warming wink before turning back to the bar to pay for your drinks, picking up the two glasses and slowly swaggering back over you.

"Here you go," he slid the tall martini glass over the table and had a sip of his own mahogany-coloured drink.

"Thanks," you sheepishly accepted the drink from him and had a sip as well. "Have you ever been here before? You walk like you own the room."

He let out a laugh, "yeah, funny you should mention it. I actually did live here briefly."

"What?" you raised your eyebrows at him.

"Yeah, the ground floor used to house one of Brooklyn's finest cobblers. I spent a few summers working for him to make a buck or two before I got drafted. Slept in his spare room at night and even snuck out there sometimes," he pointed towards the terrace outside. "- though it wasn't nearly as neat back then."

"Mmh," you twirled the straw of your drink between your fingers, smiling as you imagined a young, starry-eyed Bucky in dirty work rags. "What was Brooklyn like back then?"

Bucky looked away, contemplating his answer for a few seconds before sending you a crooked smile. "Smelly," he nodded, "- but wonderful! You would've loved it!"

"Yeah, I've heard it had a certain charm... I've actually been wondering -" you cocked your head to the side and saw how he leaned in in excitement, "- given the chance, would you go back to Brooklyn in the 40s?"

"...Well, it depends," he drawled, squinting his eyes and looking at you as if you'd just asked him a million dollar question, "- would you be there?"

"Well, no," you shook your head and took a sip of your drink. "I can't go with you since I won't be born until several decades later."

"Then it's a hard pass," he shook his head without taking a time-out to think.

"Really?" you laughed at how resolutely he was looking at you. "I mean that much to you that you'd actually stay here?"

"Sweetheart," he drawled and licked his lips, looking as if he'd won the lottery. "I'd follow you just about anywhere..."

You immediately felt your insides squirm in your belly at his soft-spoken words, his eyes more piercing than ever as he leaned in close with an excited smile on his lips.

"That's really sweet Barnes," you mumbled and tried to hide your flustered face behind your glass as he merely smiled softly at you.

Bucky ended up buying you two more cocktails, the conversation flowing more freely than you'd ever experienced in such a fancy setting before. He told you about his life before the war, stories you'd heard a million times before, but somehow never grew tired of.

Slowly, the night sky outside changed from magenta to lilac as the bar filled up with anticipating lovers, but you and Bucky were far too lost in each other to sense anything else.

It wasn't until the conversation fell on his Ma's cuisine, you realised just how hungry you were, and Bucky suggested grabbing something to eat.

"Aren't we riding the bike again?" You asked curiously when the clear night air of the Brooklyn street hit your lungs and Bucky turned the opposite direction.

"No, dinner's just around the corner," he nodded and waited for you to catch up to him.

"Where are we going?" you asked curiously, happy to see the small smile dancing on the corner of his lips when you interlocked your elbow around his.

"Oh, I have reservations for the finest dinner in all of Brooklyn," he chuckled lowly.

"Another fancy place to impress me?" You arched an eyebrow at him, hoping he was joking.

"Mmmh," he briefly squinted his eyes and tilted his head from side to side, "...something like that..."

He stopped half-way through Brooklyn Bridge Park, a purple food truck blasting mariachi music loudly beside you. He was grinning broadly as he locked eyes with you. "You want veggie or carne?" he asked excitedly.

"What?" You mirrored his laugh, taking in his amused face without understanding what was going on.

"Veggie or carne?" He repeated, this time a bit louder as the smile grew on his lips, "- for your tacos."

"Oh, we're having tacos!" you laughed, looking at the heavenly-smelling truck beside you, your eyes already scanning the different options.

"It's your favourite, isn't it?" He chuckled with an arched eyebrow. "Your ultimate comfort food."

"Yes, but how on earth do you know that?" You grinned.

"I know everything about you, sweetheart," he winked at you with a warm smile. "- and I just thought, since you always order Mexican when you're down, I'd change it around for you; tacos should be a means of celebrating."

"And what are we celebrating today?" You challenged him with an arched eyebrow.

"You finally agreeing to go out with me of course," he nodded and bumped his elbow against yours. "Come on, what are you having?"

"Alright," you grinned, liking his flirty stare. "I'll have two veggie."

"Coming right up, sweetheart," he winked at you and went to get your food while you sat down on a nearby bench, once again looking over at the Manhattan skyline.

"Hope you're hungry," Bucky laughed five minutes later when he sat down next to you, handing you two huge tacos while his other hand was clutching three for himself.

"Like you wouldn't believe," you happily accepted the food and started unwrapping one of them. "So... is this what a normal Bucky Barnes date looks like?" you had a bite of your taco and turned your head to look at him. "Fancy cocktails on top of the world followed by tacos in Brooklyn Bridge Park?"

"No, this is special," Bucky chuckled while looking between you and the Manhattan skyline with a small, knowing smile on his lips. "This is custom-made, just for you."

"Well..." you smiled and bumped your knee against him, "- you did good! This is really, really nice."

"It is," he nodded and slung his arm over the backrest of the bench, finding your body and pressing his fingers into your ribs to pull you a little closer to his comfortable torso.

You couldn't stop the satisfied sigh that left your lips at his welcome touch, and immediately put your head on the top of his shoulder, having a bite of your taco as you looked up at the blinking light atop Empire State Building's lightening rod, trying not to think too much about rhythm of his heavy heartbeat against your spine. "What do you usually do on dates then?"

"Sweetheart," Bucky chuckled above you, the warm sound bouncing in his chest against your backside. "I've known you what - two years now? Have you ever heard me talking about going on a date?"

You furrowed your eyebrows slightly, letting his words sink in. "Hold up..." you turned your head to look up at him. "- you haven't been on a date in over two years?"

"No," he shook his head resolutely and plumped in the last bite of one of his tacos, "- haven't met anyone I want to go out with..."

You blew a raspberry, "that's not true!" you laughed, "what about the girls you bring home from the bar? Don't tell me you haven't invited just a single one of them out afterwards!"

You felt him freeze slightly, his chest suddenly hard and tense underneath the back of your head. "...You - uh - you know about that?" he mumbled quietly as he immediately stopped chewing.

"Yeah, well, we share a wall, Buck" you nodded and looked up at his cringing face. "And it's not exactly as if neither you nor your dates are playing the quiet game in there," you shrugged, trying to push away the small, weird pang of sudden jealousy at the late night memories from your lonely room.

"Yeah, sorry," he mumbled awkwardly and balled up the wax paper from one of his tacos, throwing it in the bin to hide his embarrassment.

"Don't feel bad," you looked up at his guilty expression. "- it's okay... I'm sure you've heard me have sex plenty of times as well."

"Yeah... yeah I have," he breathed and shifted awkwardly behind you, his gaze firmly fixed on the dark horizon, his breathing rhythmless and laboured.

"- I'm just surprised you haven't asked anyone out, is all," you continued, still fighting the envious fire in your stomach. "I've seen how they're all lining up for you. You could have anyone you want!"

"...you'd be surprised," he mumbled, his cheeks dusted a faint shade of pink. "I - uhm - I don't know," he shrugged with a small sigh, "- I guess I just haven't met anyone I find interesting enough to spend an evening with outside the bedroom..."

"…apart from me!" you chuckled, sending him what you hoped was an amused glance.

"Yeah, apart from you, doll", he smiled softly, his body finally letting go of some of the tension it held although he was still sounding wary behind you, "- you're special."

"Likewise," you nodded slowly as the fire in the pit of your stomach finally doused. "...Okay I gotta ask you; when was the last time you had a date?"

"I don't know," he shrugged, "I tried some dating apps a few years ago. Wasn't really my thing. I guess I'm too old-fashioned for the whole online thing. I want a real meet cute."

"Yeah, well you're never gonna have a meet cute if you never leave the compound's gym," you chuckled.

"Hey, I left the gym tonight, didn't I?" he chuckled sincerely, and you were happy to finally feel his chest bounce in amusement against you again.

"Yeah, but do you really believe you're going to meet someone while you're dragging me along?" You laughed, hoping to dear God that he wouldn't.

"I don't know," he ran a hand through his short hair while licking his lips, "you never know when the right person's suddenly standing in front of you. I want to be ready for when that finally happens."

"Can't wait for that to happen to me," you sighed.

"Yeah... Can't wait either," he mumbled quietly and softly ran his thumb over your shoulder.

"Well, we can keep dreaming, the two of us," you looked up at him and softly patted his thigh. "The forever singles."

"Yeah," he nodded before he went quiet, fixing his gaze on the horizon again, taking in the dusk. "You ready for the next part of the date?" he asked after a few seconds.

"There's more?"

"Yeah, of course there's more, come on," he chuckled and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, leading you back through the park to a building opposite the fancy bar where you'd had drinks.

"The Pelican Club?" you read the large neon sign above the brass double doors. "What's this? Are we going for more drinks?"

"No," he grabbed your hand and pulled you inside to a dark room covered in heart-shaped balloons and confetti, a loud band in the corner playing peppy swing jazz for the out-of-breath-people on the dance floor. "We're going dancing!" he exclaimed happily and wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

"Barnes!" You squealed desperately and leaned in close to outshout the loud music, "I can't dance!"

"Neither can I," he shouted back with a laugh, "I haven't danced since before the war!" He grabbed a coat hanger and held out his hand to take your jacket. "...What?" He laughed when you hesitated, "- you'd trust me with your life in the field but not when it comes to something as harmless as dancing?"

You bit your lower lip, taking in how the people on the dance floor moved effortlessly with their partners, sure that you were going to make a fool of both yourself and Bucky.

"- Come on," he interrupted your train of thought with a charming smile, "- you're gonna love it, I swear!"

"Oh God..." you rolled your eyes and shook the woollen coat from off your shoulders, sending him a nervous look. "Alright! But just so you're prepared; everybody's gonna look at us!"

"Oh I hope so," he grinned, "it would be a crime not to acknowledge such a beautiful woman in such a beautiful dress," he drawled and once more put his hand on the small of your back, the pillowy words along with his somewhat craving touch so blinding and desirable, that you briefly forgot he was leading you to a dance floor.

He stopped in the middle of the room, turning around to face you. "You ready?"

"I guess," you nodded, slightly anxious about what was going to happen, but calming down almost immediately when Bucky's right hand found yours. Carefully, his metal fingers grabbed your hip and he pulled you flush against his chest.

You were looking up at him, the expression on his face soft and longing as he slowly moved his fingers over your hipbone, his chest heaving steadily before you. "Just let me lead, sweetheart," he leaned in close and whispered in your ear, his voice laced with thick syrup that melted into your ear canals and made your knees weak.

"O-okay," you nodded and followed him as he took a step to the side, his eyes never leaving yours.

You'd never seen him like this before; so tender and so up close you could take in every small detail of his angled face; the almost invisible small, brown freckles cute and innocently splashed over his straight nose, the fullness of his heavy lower lip and the curve of his cupid's bow contrasting the sharp jaw with the rough stubbles, the splash of dark blue in his otherwise clear, cerulean eyes that were dancing happily across your face.

Why had you never realised how handsome, and masculine, and dreamy he was before he’d coaxed you for a date? All this time you'd just thought of him as your sweet friend Bucky Barnes, never really seeing him for what he truly was; a fucking tease! And as you swayed on the dance floor under his full, undeniable attention, everything inside of you was screaming it at you, reminding you how blind you'd been all this time! A large megaphone ringing in your head; your best friend is the most desirable man in the world!

You saw how the small happy wrinkles around his eyes crinkled as he pulled the corners of his enticing lips upwards, his beautiful irises darting back and forth between your eyes, desperate to take in everything so he wouldn't miss out on the way you were looking at him.

"You're staring, doll," he smirked.

"Sorry," you mumbled and quickly fixed your gaze on the fingers you had placed on top of his shoulder, not wanting him to get scared at the sudden realisation you felt within.

"Don't apologise," he smiled and tilted his head closer to yours to search your face again. "I'm not complaining. I like when you look at me."

Slightly embarrassed by the audible gulp that his words activated in your throat, you carefully found his eyes, savouring the way he breathed in your arms when your gazes finally met again.

"My God," he whispered quietly, "you are beautiful."

"Barnes," you whimpered slightly, looking at his deep blue eyes, your entire body tense as he slowly swung you around.

He moved his hand over your hip, dipping his fingers a little lower than he had before as he leaned in close and whispered in your ear, "I could look at you forever..."

You could feel his breath on your skin, how the words wrapped themselves around you and made your knees feel weaker than ever. Bucky's metal fingers were placed firmly on the lower part of your hip, but you could feel how they slowly started moving up to caress your waist sensually. His aromatic cologne was invading all your senses, filling up your nostrils while his flesh hand slowly caressed your fingers, his dark eyes never leaving you.

You swayed in silence for a while, looking at each other with small, love-drunk smiles playing on your lips, the up-tempo music in the background far too fast for the type of dance you'd engaged in. The megaphone inside your head came in louder and louder the longer you stared at him; kiss him! Kiss him! But you weren't sure if you were putting too much into your dancing, and thus kept your lips at a distance, not wanting to scare him away.

"You - uh," he eventually grinned when the jazz band behind you started playing an even peppier song. "- you wanna get out of here? There's something I'd like to show you."

You merely nodded, completely lost for words as his entire presence had engulfed you.

"Alright," he removed his fingers from your hip and instead grabbed your hand, slowly pulling you to the other side of the dance floor with your fingers carefully intertwined.

Eager for the next part of his plan, you were back in the Brooklyn night air in no time, this time walking towards his motorcycle.

"What do you want to show me?" You locked your palms around his elbow and pressed your hip against his.

"When are you gonna learn that I'm not gonna tell you anything?" he laughed as he flipped open the leather seat of the bike and pulled out a blanket from the compartment underneath. "Have I not given you your money's worth up until now?"

"Oh, you've given me so much more," you chuckled and followed him back up the street.

"Alright -" he shot you a sideways glance and wrapped his arm around your shoulder again, "because you've been so well-behaved and haven't called it a fake date for hours, I'll give you a hint; what we're about to do is my favourite past-time."

"Your favourite past-time? Are we going to the gym?" You laughed, "Or are we annoying Sam? I can't decide what you like the best."

He blew a raspberry and laughed loudly, opening the door to an abandoned warehouse. "You'll see," he chuckled and led you up several flights of stairs, not stopping until you'd reached the roof of the building.

"Is your favourite past time murdering young women on top of creepy old buildings? " You laughed and sat down on a tattered bench leaning up against an old chimney. "Why are there even seats up here?"

"Because this is the prime spot in the city for stargazing," he pointed upwards.

"Stargazing?" You mumbled, your eyes following his. Your mind was immediately taken aback by the sight that met you: the sky had long ago turned from lilac to a deep blue, but now it was lit up by thousands of tiny stars twinkling competitively with the man next to you. "Wow," you breathed quietly, keeping your gaze on the many lights although Bucky's enticing scent was screaming at you to direct your attention towards him instead.

"I know," his deep voice brought you back down to earth as he unfolded the fuzzy blanket halfway and wrapped it around your shoulders before taking the seat next to you.

"As if I'm letting you freeze," you chuckled and unwrapped the other half, draping it over both your shoulders, scooting a little closer to him on the bench so the plaid could reach around both of you. You felt how his fingers hesitantly found your hips, but when you didn't move away as he pressed his fingertips to your hipbone, he snuggled a little closer.

"It's really beautiful out here tonight," you breathed as you gazed upwards. "It's not often we get to see stars this clearly in New York."

"Yeah, we're quite lucky," he scooted even closer to you, his gaze briefly skirting over your awed face.

"Yeah," you breathed, trying to ignore how close his lips were as you took in the beauty of Cassiopeia above you, "I used to sit like this with my best friend when I was a kid..."

Bucky slowly turned his face away from you, letting out an inaudible gulp as he furrowed his eyebrows, the look on his face tender and anticipating as he too looked upwards. "Me too," he mumbled after a few seconds, "- although the sky was even clearer back then."

"You used to watch the stars with Steve?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "we could sit up here for hours, imagining what our lives would be. I guess neither of us quite hit the target."

"Guess not," you grinned and caressed his leg underneath the blanket to show him that you understood. "Do you miss him?"

"Yeah, every day," Bucky nodded, "I wish you guys had met. He would've liked you."

"Me too," you softly stroked your little finger over his kneecap to console him. "He seems like a good man."

"The best," Bucky concluded with a nod, "- but I guess it all turned out how it was supposed to anyway. He's with Peggy, the love of his life, and I'm here with you..." he smiled softly, tilting his head from side to side. "Well - and Sam of course."

"Ah yes!" You laughed, "- let's not forget about the love of your life!"

"Don't tell him I mentioned him," he sent you a crooked smile, "I'd never hear the end of it!"

"I'll try not to," you chuckled and moved your hand over the tense muscles of his thigh. "Did you and Steve take all your dates dancing back then?"

"Of course," he nodded, "I wasn't stupid. Perfect opportunity for prolonged eye contact and a few strategically placed hands."

"Oh my God," rolled your eyes with a laugh.

"You should've seen me," he smirked, "two arms and an undeniable boyish charm. And when I put on the uniform, they didn't stand a chance in resisting me."

"Oh, I bet!" you chuckled, "Did you take them up here afterwards then?"

"Sometimes," he smirked, and you could feel how he his breathing was coming in nervous. "If they were particularly special," he held you a little tighter.

You sat in silence for a while, both of you smiling up at the stars above you, taking in the beauty of the night sky while Bucky's hand softly caressed your shoulder and upper arm.

"Alright," he said suddenly, looking at his wristwatch, "I'm afraid that's it for tonight. A gentleman always has his girl home before midnight," he winked at you and stood up from the bench, offering you his hand.

"Scared that your coach might turn into a pumpkin?" You laughed and let him help you to your feet.

"It's just proper dating etiquette. And I'm showing you what a proper date looks like, remember?" he winked at you.

"Yeah," you nodded, happy that he had decided to take you out even though you'd been hesitant to accept at first. "Of course," you smiled up at him and laced your fingers between his, feeling his pulse in the tips as he lead you back down the flight of stairs and over to his motorcycle.

"Hey, you wanna steer?" he asked suddenly while watching you strap your helmet.

"Steer? The bike?"

"Come on, it's easy," he grinned and swung his leg over the seat, scooting backwards to make room for you in front of him. "Come here," he said quietly as you slowly approached him and swung your leg over the seat as well. Bucky put his hands on your hips to keep you in place and pressed you against his warm chest, a deep flutter shooting through your limbs, fogging up your brain.

"So what you want to do," he leaned in close and almost whispered in your ear, "- is to keep one hand on the throttle at all times," he wrapped his large hand around yours on top of the right handle. "Roll it towards yourself to speed up, the other way to slow down, okay?" He waited for your confirmation before he continued, "- up here, you squeeze the lever to brake the front wheel," he stretched your right-hand fingers and pressed in on them before moving his large hand to your leg, brushing his fingers over the exposed skin at your thigh before pointing towards a pedal by your foot. "- and this one to break the back wheel," he whispered and sent shivers down your spine as he put his other hand low on the left side of your hip. "You shift gears on the clutch up here - and by using the pedal down there, but don't worry about that, I'll do that, you just concentrate on speed and steering... Okay, doll?" He whispered sensually and slowly moved both hands over your thighs, his fingers warm on your skin against the cold February air.

The words were stuck in your throat, and you couldn't move. You wanted to feel his hands on your entire body, not just on the strip of exposed skin below the hem of your dress. "Mmm-hmm," you mumbled, a flush of sensuality settling in your stomach as you took in the way his fingers felt on you.

"Alright, sweetheart," he whispered, his lips dangerously close to your ear, "when you're ready, push the ignition and slowly roll the throttle towards yourself."

You did as he said, feeling how the machine rumbled and spluttered as it came to life between your legs. Bucky had his arm draped casually across your waist and he scooted a little closer to you, making himself comfortable on the leather seat underneath the two of you as you slowly turned the right handlebar and felt how the bike immediately reacted to it and started rolling down the street.

The miles sped away underneath the black tires as you steered through Brooklyn and upstate to the Avenger's compound you both called home. The lights of the city were a blur around you, Bucky's warm breath pleasant against your neck, his lips buzzing right next to the sensitive skin.

"You're doing so well, sweetheart," he mumbled in your ear while gently running his fingers over the soft fabric of your red dress, grinning against your ear every time you gave an unconscious squeeze to the throttle, coaxing more power from the rumbling machine beneath you.

Before you'd really had a chance to savour the ride back from Manhattan and Bucky's warm praises against your skin, you had parked the motorcycle in the garage, had giggled innocently in the short elevator ride to your floor, and were suddenly standing outside your bedroom door, saying good night.

"Thanks for doing this, Barnes, I had a really great time with you.”

"Me too, sweetheart," he muttered and put his head on the wall while looking at you with a soft expression, the air between you more charged than ever. "I hope it was worth sacrificing your Valentine's Day over."

You took a step closer to him and touched the hem of his jacket sleeve, "this is the best Valentine's Day I've ever had, thank you."

Bucky's eyes scanned your face briefly as a proud smile emerged on his lips. "Me too, sweetheart..." he nodded, looking as if he was having a hard time holding himself back from touching you.

"So... how does the Bucky Barnes experience usually end?" you asked quietly, looking up at his piercing eyes.

"Well," he drawled, "...there are a couple of outcomes. And they all depend on the key jangle."

"The key jangle?" you asked hesitantly and furrowed your eyebrows, suddenly nervous you were failing some sort of weird test.

"Yeah," Bucky nodded his head with a chuckle, "- you see; when you follow a woman to her door, and you stand like this," he took a step closer and pointed between the two of you, "she will always either fiddle with her keys or not depending on how eager she is to open the door. A key jangle without an invitation to come inside, means you should just thank her for tonight, turn around and go home. Key jangle and an invitation means she really wants you to come up for a nightcap. And no key jangle at all usually means she wants you to kiss her at her door."

"You can tell all that just from the keys?" you threw back your head with a laugh, taking in how he shifted his weight on his feet and ran a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, usually..." he licked his lips hesitantly, his eyes travelling down to your hands that you had buried in the pockets of your coat.

You knew what he was requesting; he wanted to see if you were fiddling your keys or not.

Slowly, you pulled both hands up from your pockets, laying them flat in front of him and turning them around, showing him your empty palms.

His eyes snapped from your hands and up to your face.

His chest was heaving slowly, his eyes darkening as the pupils slowly drowned out the blue in his irises while he looked at you. "No keys," he concluded quietly, trying hard to fight the smile that tugged on the corners of his mouth. "Fuck me," he smiled broadly, and stepped over to you, putting his calloused palm to the side of your face where he stroked his thumb over your jawline while his lips danced enticingly close to yours.

You let out a small whimper at the soft touch, reached up, and pressed your pillowy lips to his broad smile.

The kiss was short and sweet, but it didn't take Bucky two seconds before he let out a satisfied groan and pulled you closer. "Fuck, sweetheart!" he whispered with a breath heavier than ever before. "You have no idea how long I've waited for this," he growled and put his hand in the back of your neck, his lips urging you to open your mouth so he could slip his tongue past your teeth and into your wet mouth.

He gave out a sensual groan when your tongues finally found each other and happily trailed his metal fingers up your side; touching the exposed skin of your thigh, grazing over the curve of your hip, massaging your waistline through the soft fabric of your red dress.

You pulled your head slightly backwards, just enough to free your lips from his, but the quiet whimper that escaped Bucky's throat when he chased your mouth wasn't lost on you.

"You wanna..." you breathed, taking in his blushed face, his hooded eyelids, his unruly hair, "- you wanna come inside?"

He smirked proudly and leaned closer, pressing a series of soft, wet kisses to your throat that were so sensual and full of lust that this time, it was you who whimpered.

"Yeah, sweetheart," he breathed against the wet spots on your neck, "fuck I wanna come inside!" He growled and resumed his kisses to the thin skin below your ear as you desperately tried to fit your key in the lock.

His hands were snaking around your stomach, his palms pressing you closer to his pelvis, and he leaned in close and whispered in your ear. "Sweetheart, I want to take you out again..." he pulled your earlobe between your teeth.

"Buck!" You gasped when you felt his fingers graze over the skin of your inner thighs.

"Tonight wasn't play-pretend for me..." he whispered, "I want you. All of you. Not just on missions and during training sessions at the gym - all the time."

You fiddled with your keys in the lock, desperate to rip off his clothes, and finally managed to open the door to your room.

You quickly spun around in his arms and felt his large palms dip lower on your hips while he was looking at you with a slightly nervous and anticipating look.

"Okay you got me," you whispered and hooked a finger in his collar as you took a step backwards and hauled him into your room.

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