#i don't know how people do it

[therewillbenoromance]

new pfp just dropped

[ovur]

I've never been the type of stardew player to have one of those elaborate farms who also decorate a bunch but I wanted to try this time around but of course I chose the riverland farm.....

[replicated]

lately i've really been contending with my inability to imagine a future. when i try to i just hit a wall of blackness. a lot of it stems from my constant fears about the environment and the current state of geopolitics and it just won't release me. all i really want is to work on my writing and have some geniune companionship in my life but it's gotten difficult to even imagine that being possible in the long-term anymore

[council-of-beetroot]

I don't want to proofread this. It probably needs more added but it ahh.

[sort-of-dying]

it is so weird to me that some people don't have anxiety. I mean, you're telling me that you DON'T think about the embarrassing thing you said five years ago randomly? You're telling me you DON'T constantly worry about how people see you and stress about whether they like you or not? What do you think about all day?

[eldrai]

how do you just accept you're in pain and you will be forever because i feel like it's impossible when pain is supposed to be a signal for something wrong and not constant. we're not hardwired to have that 24/7

[halfdeadwallfly]

how are people out here just forming genuine relationships with other people

[mereelskirata]

*plans to make a one-shot comic* 

*draws out two thumbnail pages with 9 panels*

*there is only regret now* 

[onewomancitadel]

The worst view in the Tumblr UI update is /blog/ which I use the most because it's where I post from. Information on the left-hand column is doubled up on the right, and information is displayed twice, and every time I reload this page (I am bad with tabs please don't look at my shame) the Accounts tab pops open again even if it's been previously shut.

I think they're stuck between a rock and a hard place PR-wise (Not Like the Other Social Medias) particularly when converging on homogeneity in design less looks like natural convergence towards best practice and more towards 'you are baby and you need big number to press and then you press the big number over and over'. Basically the Cookie Clicker philosophy of modern design.

I've seen some of the designers on Tumblr be completely open about the fact they are trying to do the impossible (user-funded social media) which has never been done before, so they're not completely committed to abandoning the website, but golly gee I think the reaction Tumblr veterans have had to the changes isn't really comparable to 'put the reblog button back on top' and also, it's just really really bad timing. I also think that the whole psychology behind 'the way users are supposed to interact with a website' is a bit backwards and takes a lot of shortcuts, but I don't really expect commercially-driven psychology to really view people in that complex a way.

The question I have is that 'why do people interact differently now from ten years ago', which includes when Tumblr was sold for a billion dollars. That includes marked population shift in userbase and higher aspirations of desired userbase, but I also think that a lot of this stuff is cultivated, and it's not like the issue before with Tumblr was 'people are too stupid to use it and also it's not Twitter'. People are used to Twitter because they used Twitter, not because Twitter had the best design. And so on.

[mayhemchicken-artblog]

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off

EDIT: reblogs are STAYING OFF. op was right and correct and i have never regretted making a post as much as this one. if you want to reblog my art you can reblog something else from my blog. or commission me, lord knows i deserve financial compensation for the nightmare this post has put me through

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

[not-so-sleepy-creature]

It's a good day to be a good day

It's a good day to be a good day

It's a good day to be a good day

*screams internally*

[egophiliac]

still ruminating over Lost In the Book With Spooky Skeletons Part 1, so here's a selection of some of my favorite little bits! (...some more loosely paraphrased than others) (I just feel like Idia has no room to criticize in general, okay)

anyway, I'm sure we're just going to have a fun time celebrating Halloween and nothing bad is going to happen whatsoever! :)

[kenzie-ann27]

why have mental breakdowns if not to use them to fuel your own writing