#i don;t think anybody wants to read that

[iwakuraz]

just found my old diary and the first page of it basically reads as follows: 'my name is molly. I am 8 years old and it is 2017. I am weird and have no friends. I hate being a girl and wish I was a boy. if I was a boy I would be so much happier. all of my friends have abandoned me. nobody is nice to me. my favourite toy is my donald duck tsum tsum.' nothing about me has changed

[noellefan101]

Offline to Online HSR edition

Characters: Kafka, Silver Wolf, Seele, Bronya x gn! reader

Summary: your girlfriend is a streamer, a popular one at that. this is a fic about: how their chat finds out that you are dating, how they treat you off-stream and on-stream/do they treat you differently

"Warnings": Romantic relationship, modern au, streamer au, kissing, [h/c] is hair color, not proofread,

Note: this is the other one that was in the poll if you would like to read the genshin impact version it´s here. and omg i am so tired and my back hurts like CRAZY, but i luv you all.

Kafka

How chat found out: she kinda wanted to say it out loud the first day/month you started dating, but you stopped her because you didn´t want the whole world to know. and she agreed it was for the best anyways/don´t want all her simps to come at you(looking at you "cough cough")/. so she kept it a secret, still teases you about it though. and she was pretty good at hiding it, but then it had been a year or so and you moved in together, in a new house.

so obviously it was going to be harder to hide it, mainly because you lived together, but also because she was asked 24/7 to do a new house tour. she eventually did it, but without your office being in the video. it worked out well in the beginning but then people started wondering what was in the last room/your office/. you were worried about it, while she ignored it and acted like no one had asked about it. that of course didn´t help and only grew more suspicion to the last room. she eventually had enough and started asking you if she could say it, following up with her saying that her fans won´t come after you for it.

On-stream: she teases you, every time she has a chance too, and i mean EVERY time. she normally does that a lot, but not this much. she also doesn´t like when anyone else teases you. you´d say she´s possessive, but if you actually said that when she´s streaming, you would be banned from entering her office for a few months(at least).

Off-stream: she´s WAY sweeter when no one is watching, mostly because she doesn´t have that evil look in her eyes all the time. and then she´s with you so ofc she´ll behave(if you ask nicely). she would also kiss you more passionately than when she´s in front of chat/she doesn´t need chat to spread pics of you kissing all over twitter, that´s why/and she also hugs you more gently. over all she´s just softer with you but don´t tell her that.

she loves you, even more than chat loves her.

Silver Wolf

how chat found out: they didn´t really think that you were dating at first, but just some affectionate roommates. maybe it was because they didn´t think that she would be dating anybody/or maybe you looked too good to be dating silver wolf hehe/. but either way, you ARE dating, you just thought her chat knew already. but when you found out they didn´t/because they called you her roomie, not her partner/you tried to show more affection.

so when you were home while she was streaming you made some food for her. walked in and gave her the food, after you just left a little kiss on her cheek. leaving the chat stunned, she just started eating her food, acting like nothing happened. she asked if anything was wrong and they flipped out even more, like wtf they just kissed you. she didn´t think it was that big of a deal and tried to move on. but they wanted answers, she didn´t care ofc, and didn´t answer any of their questions. after she was done eating and she just continued the stream like normal. you on the other hand was a little worried that she got upset, because you just kissed her on the cheek, and in front of all her viewers. she eventually revealed to chat that you were dating, and they should shut up abt it. only because she didn´t want you to worry.

On-stream: she doesn´t really care if you´re there or not, but id happier with you there. she shows affection, but not much. the reason: she doesn´t want to ruin her reputation.

Off-stream: when she´s not streaming or in a call you play with her instead. she loves when you play with her, wanting to share her interest with you. she does this while hugging you/maybe from behind/and kisses you to distract you.

she loves games, but loves you even more.

Seele

How chat found out: they properly noticed the person walking around in the background all the time/since her streaming setup is in the living room/and they didn´t know who it was other than a person with [h/c] colored hair. they tried to ask about it, but Seele didn´t pay them any mind and moved on. she kinda thought they were joking and already knew who you were/but there kinda clueless and thinks she kidnapped someone/but ofc you´re just her partner and she didn´t force you to live with her. actually, it was your idea to live with her. so they should quit thinking that.

but anyway, she was streaming(like usual)and she was in a call with some friends/like Sampo, Bronya, Natasha, etc/and she kinda got into an argument with one of them/Sampo/. because he wasn´t playing well enough and it turned into a thing of them dissing each other. the others wanted to stop them, but they didn´t in fear of getting into it as well, so they kinda just listened in on it. she then revealed one of his secrets, witch lead to him saying that you and Seele were dating, and not just roomies. she then got confused, and asked f they didn´t know/bc she really fricking thought they did, oh well/the chat went wild. and when she found out they were clueless the whole time, she just laughed her ass off.

On-stream: she doesn´t have you around that much/other than in the background/but when you are there beside her, she has most of her attention fixated on you. she likes kissing, hugging and sitting with you, even if in front of everyone. and she doesn´t get embarrassed about it.

Off-stream: if possible she´s even more affectionate, the only reason is because she doesn´t want you to be embarrassed. but if you gave her permission, she would be all over you at all times, at parties, events, on stream, in front of friends and family... you get it.

she loves you a lot, even when you´re not around.

Bronya

How chat found out: she streams a lot, like a ton. so of course you´d either get home while she´s streaming or just be home in general. she´s very busy so you don´t say anything other than "i´m home", when you check on her after being out. or other times it´s you delivering food to her. in general chat mainly thinks that your just some friends living together, but thats only because they don´t know that you´re dating, and you don´t plan on revealing it right now. maybe because you either were busy, didn´t want to or you were scared of her viewers reaction/but she does comfort you, and tell you that they will accept it/.

the way they knew you were dating, was mainly because of you two being stupid. she was on a little break/since she had been streaming the last 5-6 hours, with only 3-4 breaks(send help)/and you walked into her room giving her a snack and kissed her on the cheek. that would have been okay normally, but this time she forgot to turn off the mic. leaving you to realize that after you looked at the chat, because it was going wild. you both then got embarrassed and she turned the stream off. she was supposed to stream for a few more hours but ditched the idea. and in the next week or so she now had to introduce you, when you were fully ready of course.

On-stream: she doesn´t show that much affection, since she gets easily embarrassed and looks almost identical to a tomato. but sometimes she will do cooking streams with you, and try to show off a little/that would be even cuter if you were a baker or cook, just saying(totally not trying to say anything)/but it doesn´t end that well.

Off-stream: she loves to hug, kiss and cuddle you. she feels so much more confident when you´re the only one watching, so she tries to show that she loves you as much as she can. she also feels safer when its only you and her.

she loves her job, but not as much as she loves you.

if you´d like more of these do request, luv ya-Masterlist

You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts

[frostedcats]

heyy, since you're a death note blog I would like to request a Mello X reader back at Whammy's House if possible. I was thinking about Mello trying to confess to the reader while Matt teases him about it :)

MELLO X READER

Heya! This is the first time I write something like this. I hope I can please you! It s not really about Mello confessing but about him inviting you to meet up so he can confess. He got too akward trying to confess and Matt got him out of shit by saying that Mello actually wanted you two to meet up.

《¤~☆~¤》

   It was an annoyingly sunny friday. My skin was bathing in sunshine, felling like it was going to burn and fall off. The most annoying part was that I wasn t even outside, but inside the library looking for some shitty book my teacher told me to read. Roger just wouldn t let me close the curtains even tho the windows are awfully big.

    After looking for a while I start hearing some chuckles... Matt?

    "C mon dude just tell them!" I barely heard his voice.. Then I hear Mello:

     "Oh for God s sake just stop it! Bloody hell I told you to stop!"

      Come to think of it for the past month Mello has been acting really strange.. But, not in a bad way.. Whenever i annoyed him his death stare got softer, looking like he was trying to not hurt my feelings. I caught him a few times staring at me and he somehow looked nervous around me. Matt was teasing him a lot more lately too. I once heard him mock Mello about becoming softer and blushing around me, and he ended up getting smacked in the head. I didn t really think much about it even though it s kinda obvious Mello is fond of me. It s hard to belive that he likes anybody so I just decided to ignore these signs. Even though I have to admit I'm fond of him too...

    I screech as somebody touched my shoulder. I leave my internal dialogue and look back to see Mello who seemed to be sick, his face was way too red to not be noticed, looking like he cut off Matt s hair and stuck it to his cheeks. Talking of Matt, he was behind him, keeping a comfortable distance so he could hear us. I look at the blond and admire him for a few seconds. The sun making his hair shine and accentuating the red blush in his cheeks.. I get the sudden urge to run my hands through his soft looking hair. He was wearing a black t-shirt and some fucked up jeans that looked like they belong to a solider from WW2. I chukle a little at the comparation I came up with. I look up back at his face to see his gaze upon my body. I feel my face heat up.

     "Hey Mello! Did something happen? You don t look so well.. are you sick?" I notice him jump a little when he hears my voice.

     "Oh, um.. Sorry. I m not sick don t worry.. it s just a little hot outside. I wanted to tell you something."

     "Go ahead, I m listening!"

      "I wanted to tell you... I- um" I see him scratch the back of his head and then mumble something.

       "What was that?" I ask making sure I don t sound mean.

        My gaze leaves his body as i hear Matt approach us.

        "He wanted to ask if you want to meet up tomorrow in the forest, after lunch, but it seems the great detective can t find his words!" Matt explains rolling his eyes and jokingly punching Mello in the arm. Mello glares at him and looks back at me.

        "Yeah.. that s what i wanted to say. I want to talk about something in private with you, tomorrow." Mello sounds way to soft for his own good. I m not used to this.

        "Sure! I m free tomorrow I don t have a lot of homework."

         I see his face light up after i accept his invitation. Matt whispers something to him and I notice his eyes widen and his cheeks become a darker colour of red, he pushes Matt playfully and curses something at him. I laugh at their interaction.

          "Hey i was actually having trouble finding a book! Do you think you two can help me?" I ask simlling

          "I can t help you right now! There s a super important event on Mario Bros! I m sure Mello can help you though."

          "Fuck you, Matt.." I hear Mello whisper.

          "Love you too, Mello! I ll leave you two now, have fun!" Joked Matt, winking and waving us goodbye, then running to the door...

《¤~☆~¤》

Please tell me if i messed something up! Thank you so much for the request! <3

[goodlucktai]

find another guiding light

rise of the tmnt pairing: don & leo, don & raph, don & mikey word count: 4k title borrowed from dear reader by t swift pre&post-movie

read on ao3

x

“What the hell are we gonna do about Leon?” Donnie says one day when both his older brother and his twin are gone from the lair on a two-man training run that is almost certainly going to end in disaster.

He doesn’t know why he says it. He certainly isn’t expecting any answer that isn’t just an annoyed groaning sound, because what other answer even is there?

But Mikey replies, “You mean how self-destructive he’s been lately?” and it puts Donnie fully on the back foot.

“What?” Donnie says blankly.

“Is that not what we’re talking about?”

“I mean—I guess—I wouldn’t have called it that,” Donnie says, but now that he’s saying it he’s not sure.

Mikey snorts. The sound is humorless. “What else would you call it? Running around throwing himself face-first at every bad guy we find without waiting for back-up, refusing to hang back and come up with a plan even though it used to be his favorite part of a mission, not listening to anybody about anything—it’s like he forgot what self-preservation even is.”

Donnie is thinking really hard and really fast, looking at the last few months through this new lens.

Leo’s their self-proclaimed face-man, but he’s also the idea guy. Donnie is an outright genius when it comes to science and engineering and everything in between, but his twin isn’t stupid. Leo is as clever and Machiavellian as any storybook trickster, and tactics come as easily to him as breathing.

He’s always been the one to suggest a plan, to guide his brothers back on track, to keep them from getting in over their heads. The only times he and Raph ever used to butt heads was when Leo had an idea more stealth than smash.

Donnie would never admit it out loud but Leo’s had those qualities since they were kids. He’s charismatic and charming, a theater kid at heart with the modified genetics of a super soldier and a mind every bit as bright as Donatello’s, even as it twists and turns down other avenues. It made sense that he’d be shoehorned into a leadership role as he got a little older. Leo is the type of person who would be thrilled to captain the crew.

So then why did Leo do a complete 180?

And Mikey made another point, too, whether or not he knows it. If Leo was just being a huge jerk outright, Dr. Delicate Touch would have made an appearance by now and shut that shit down hard. But the fact is, Dr. Feelings has taken point on this one—and if there’s one thing Donnie’s learned the hard way, it’s that Mikey in feelings mode is usually the right one to listen to.

Mikey is watching his pastries rise in the oven. Donnie can see his expression reflected in the glass door. It’s flattened out into plain worry.

“He never tells us any of the important stuff,” the youngest Hamato says, tone uncharacteristically bitter. “He just goes on and on about things that don’t matter until we’re distracted, and it works every stupid time.”

“Leo’s always been that way,” Donnie interjects half-heartedly. “You can’t come at him head-on about stuff or he clams up. You gotta go in a series of annoying, convoluted circles to get to the heart of the thing. He’s literally the creature in the middle of the labyrinth.”

Mikey points at Donnie, as if to say ‘you got me there.’ “And that’s exactly why I don’t think Raphie’s method is helping.”

It’s obviously something he doesn’t want to admit. Mikey is his brothers’ number one fan and cheerleader first, person second. He bites the inside of his lip and starts twisting his fingers in a manner that promises to be painful. Donnie digs into the pocket of his hoodie and shoves one of his own mesh and marble fidget toys across the table at him. It’s an obnoxious lime green color and it makes Mikey smile involuntarily. He twists the toy instead and Donnie falls back into his train of thought running at roughly mach ten.

Raph’s method of confronting anything is head-on. That’s just the type of guy he is—steady and solid and unflinching. And they all depend on him the way most other people probably depend on the sun to rise every morning. Donnie literally does not know how they would make it a single day without Raphael, and prefers not to think about it.

But that also means that Raph and Leo can be like oil and water. And suddenly, the ‘A Team’’s constant bickering and late-night shouting matches and cold shoulders makes more sense.

“I don’t know what to do,” Mikey admits, this empathetic powerhouse with more emotional intelligence in one finger than Donnie has in his whole body. It’s incredibly disheartening to hear. “So for now I just want Leo to know that someone’s on his team.”

Whatever else he might have said is cut off by the familiar electric snap of a portal opening near the turnstiles, and then a second later Raph and Leo materialize in the lair, mid-roof-raising-argument.

Raph is carrying Leo carefully through the living room. There’s blood on his hands, enough to make Mikey suck in a breath from his station in front of the oven. Right away, the facts come together in Donnie’s brain: Leo got hurt.

What looks like all the bandages from the medkit on his waist are wrapped around his arm. Whatever happened, it was bad enough to push out those stress lines around Raph’s eyes and mouth, bad enough that he still hasn’t set Leo on his own two feet, like he might be able to undo all the pain if he just keeps holding him. But Leo is doing what Leo always does, hiding whatever he’s actually feeling behind a smarmy grin and a smart-ass attitude, and Raph’s fear and worry and love have coalesced into something huge and ferocious that sounds a lot like anger.

Now Donnie knows what to look for.

“—what happens when you don’t listen!” Raph snaps furiously. “God, Leo, it’s like you don’t even care!”

“Why should I? Look where it’s gotten you!”

Something darts through Mikey’s eyes that makes Don want to snap at something.

“Leo,” he says, his flat tone cutting through the fight like a souped-up soldering iron through the cheap components of a certain rat’s ancient CRT TV (not that he would know), “you’re still bleeding.”

There’s a beat of silence, and then Raph and Leo both look down at the slider’s arm. Red is blooming across the crisp white gauze. Mikey makes a wounded noise. Right away, Leo clambers out of Raph’s arms with a joke to make their youngest feel better—“It’s okay, Miguel, you should see the other guy!”—and Raph’s getting heated again at the apparent flippancy, and god, it never fucking ends, does it?

Leo is retreating further and further into this new character that doesn’t care about himself or anybody else, and it’s happening right before Donnie’s eyes. He’s already slinking away, out of the warmth and light of the kitchen, away from his family

Donnie realizes abruptly that there is a non-zero chance he might lose his twin brother. That one day he might wake up and not know Leo anymore.

He stands up, chair screeching behind him.

“Lesser twin, with me.”

Leo opens his mouth to try to get out of it, but that’s not going to happen. Donnie’s not having it. With the way their bodies work—ninpo and genetic modifications and yokai-isms, oh my—if it’s still bleeding, it needs stitches. And Leo, self-made team medic, ought to know that.

He gives Leo a look that says Remember when Taylor Swift’s Folklore album came out and you performed the entire thing in my lab and I swore I didn’t record you? I one-thousand-percent recorded you.

Leo’s look back succinctly says You motherfucker.

But he falls in next to Donnie without another word, a move that probably bewilders their brothers into next year. He definitely isn’t happy about it. He’s still prickly and defensive. It seems like he’s waiting to get ganged up on.

Raph starts to follow them and Donnie says, “I got it.” He shoves Leo a step ahead of him, putting his own body between him and Raph like a wall. It doesn’t feel good to do it. He chooses cowardice and doesn’t look back at whatever Raph’s expression looks like as a result.

Behind them, ever-reliable Mikey jumps in immediately with a bright, “You can help me with the cupcakes, Raph! We’re doing cream-filled red velvet!”

In the infirmary, Donnie points Leo toward a cot. Leo rolls his eyes and hops up to sit on the edge of it. He starts unwinding the gauze from around his arm agreeably enough, wincing a bit when the final layer sticks and comes away with a painful pull.

Don’s stomach swoops unpleasantly at the sight of the torn skin. It’s definitely not the worst he’s seen—they’ve taken worse damage flubbing skateboarding moves on the half-pipe—but it’s still not nice to look at. He takes a moment to swallow hard, then asks, “What happened?”

“Typical oozesquito shenanigans,” Leo says off-handedly. “Alley cat? Adorable. Mutated yokai alley cat? Not as much.”

Donnie grimaces sympathetically. “Claws or teeth?”

“Teeth. Hey, do you think we can get rabies?”

“I can’t wait to find out.” Putting rabies vaccinations at the top of his mental to-do list, Donnie gestures with a sweep of his arm at the infirmary. “This is your domain, Nerdo. Where’s the stuff I need?”

“You know I don’t actually need an assist. Like you said, my domain.”

“Wow that’s a super interesting non-answer to my question.”

With a dramatic, put-upon sigh, Donnie’s little brother points him in the right direction and says, “Steri-strips are in the top left cabinet.”

Immensely grateful he wasn’t directed towards the suture needles or the skin stapler, because as willing as he is to help it really doesn’t take much for Vomitello to make a guest appearance, the softshell rummages through Leo’s meticulously organized industrial-tool-chest-turned-medical-supply-cabinet, triumphantly coming up with a pack of adhesive bandages and some antiseptic wipes after a moment.

He pushes the wheeled stool over with his foot and it bounces gently off Leo’s knee, shuddering to a stop just in front of him. Leo tries to kick it as Donnie sits down and nearly succeeds, giggling like a menace when Donnie staggers and almost eats it face-first on the floor.

“Okay,” Don says loudly, not actually as annoyed as he’s trying to sound. “Arm.”

“Donald, seriously, I got it.”

“Leonard, seriously, I will upload that T Swift footage today.”

Leo mimics him with all the maturity of a three-year-old but ultimately surrenders his arm. He looks tense and uncomfortable the whole time, like he’s forgotten how to let someone this close.

And Donnie thinks about what Mikey said in the kitchen, about wanting Leo to know he had someone on his team. He thinks about how things were a year ago, when that would have gone without saying.

It doesn’t take long to wipe down Leo’s arm and press the steri-strips over the wound. Then Donnie sits next to him on the cot. Neither of them speak up right away. They can both tell this is going to be a Moment, and Donnie, for one, is bracing himself. He gets the feeling that he really, truly, can’t fuck this one up.

“I know something’s percolating in that abstruse brain of yours,” he finally says. “So talk. But do me a favor and skip over all the posturing and trying to convince me nothing’s going on and lying right to my face, okay? I don’t know how much time we have before Mikey kicks the door in and drags us to a TED talk.”

It’s as much of a threat as it needs to be. Grudgingly, like he’s prying each word up out of the mud, Leo mutters, “I want dad to take it back.”

Donnie wants more than anything to shake Leo until all of his secrets fall out of his mouth and Donnie can sweep them away to a safer place. Like an encrypted folder on his computer. But he can’t do that, so he has to settle for—ughh, patience.

It pays off. Leo admits, in the safe, familiar space of his infirmary, that he doesn’t want to be team leader. He doesn’t want things to change. His crooked, cooked-up scheme is to just—fuck up over and over again until papa decides Leo can’t be trusted with that mantle that rightfully belongs to Raph.

Donnie understands him. Of course he does. He hates change, too. It makes him feel itchy and restless. He likes knowing what to expect. He likes when everything is in the same place he left it.

If Leo wanted to be the leader, he’d be good at it. As long as he doesn’t want to, he won’t be. So it’s a scheme—Donnie can get behind that. He knows whose side he’s on. It’s the side he’s always been on, since the day he read the definition of “twin” out of a water-logged dictionary. It’s his job to be here. Leo’s kind of an idiot for expecting him to be anywhere else.  

“Not a bad hypothesis,” Donnie says, pressing their shoulders together. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Leo’s face split in an honest smile. “It’d probably work a lot better for you if you’d let Raph in on it, you know.”

“Please, are you kidding?” Leo scoffs. “As if he’d ever play along. Half the time I think he must hate me. I stole his job and now I’m not even doing it right.”

Are we talking about the same person? Donnie wants to demand. Raphael, the guy who carried you home not even twenty minutes ago? The guy who’s always carried you?

He doesn’t say that. Instead, he says, “Let me handle Raph.”

Back in the kitchen, the cupcakes are filled and in the process of being frosted. Mikey’s going all out, piping bag in hand, an assortment of edible decorations spread across the counter. Raph is gamely assisting to the best of his ability, even though his big fingers make it more of a task than it rightly should be. They both glance up when Donnie and Leo come in.

“Hey, your timing is as suspiciously convenient as always,” Mikey says cheerfully. “I need to take some pics for my Insta but after that you better come eat some of these.”

“Everything good?” Raph asks gruffly.

“Todo esta bien, hermano,” Leo says, breezing inside like he hadn’t just spent the last ten minutes unloading his fear of failure and inadequacy, as well as his certainty that the big brother he admires so much doesn’t like him anymore. “It smells like magic in here! Michael, we gotta get you a sponsor or something. The world needs to experience this.”

Mikey laughs and passes Leo a piping bag. “Raphie’s working on a rainbow sprinkle unicorn cupcake over there, and you’ll never guess who that one’s for.”

The surprise that darts across Leo’s face hurts to look at. His eyes drop down to the lopsided multi-colored creation taking shape under Raph’s clumsy hands. He looks more vulnerable in that moment than he has since the day dad unceremoniously turned everything they knew upside down.

“Raph, I need to talk to you,” Donnie says loudly because he’s about to get mad and do something he’ll probably regret, like put his fist through the projector in the TV room. “Chop-chop. The sprinkles can wait.”

“The sprinkles cannot,” Mikey and Leo chorus at the same time in exactly the same tone like the freaks of nature they are. Raph makes the right choice and escapes their company, following Don down the tunnel toward his corner of the lair.

“Okay, focus up,” Donnie says the second the reinforced door is closed behind them.  “We’re getting your old job back.”

He understands why the infirmary gave Leo the courage to talk. His lab does the same for him. It’s like Mikey’s kitchen, Raph’s dojo—they each have a place that makes them feel their best.

“Wait, what?” Raph looks bewildered. “What are you talking about?”

“The leader schtick, Raphala, keep up please. Leo’s going to keep sabotaging himself at full-speed until papa sees the light and demotes him. I’d like to see that happen before he breaks all of the bones in his body.”

Raph’s brow furrows beneath his mask. “Hang on, is that what he’s doing? I thought he just—didn’t care.”

Donnie gives that remark the deeply unimpressed look it deserves. “Right. Leonardo Hamato, the guy who started teaching himself field medicine when he was eight years old after you sprained your ankle and he cried for two hours because he didn’t know how to fix it, doesn’t care.”

He kind of feels bad for dumping this on Raph the way he has, but honestly. They’ve been stuck in place for months now, and Mikey’s been on edge constantly with all the fighting, and Leo’s going to get himself killed trying to prove something no one else believes, and Donnie can feel something toothed and tender coming alive inside his chest, trying to bite and claw and fight its way out.

Leo’s afraid you hate him, he doesn’t say, but he wants to. Leo’s scared all the time now. Of course he’s been acting like an asshole, when’s the last time he actually told somebody he was scared?

Donnie’s the fixer. He wants to fix this. If Raph would just get on board, maybe he’ll be able to.

“If Leo wanted to be the leader, we would have heard about it one million times every single day since he was four, ” Donnie says plainly. “The fact is, we haven’t. Draw your own conclusion.”

“But he’d be good at it,” Raph says, his tone blank with surprise and a total lack of comprehension. “That’s why dad gave him that role in the first place. I was always supposed to be the placeholder while Leo grew up. And now if he’d just put in the effort—if he’d try—he’d be amazing.”

“Okay, and I’d be good at domestic terrorism, but somehow I think you’d frown upon me reaching my full potential there.”

“Donnie!” Raph looks scandalized, like the NSA might be listening in. Puh-lease.

“Look,” Donnie says. He has no idea why he’s the one fielding these feelings talks, but he gives it his best shot. It’s probably not fair to shovel it onto Mikey’s shoulders all the time anyway. “You’re not a placeholder anything. Don’t say that. You’re our leader. We’ve always followed you. If we didn’t want to, we wouldn’t. Especially Leo. He’s a nightmare person. He’s never done a single thing he didn’t want to do. He was happy being your right-hand man.”

The snapper stares at him. His eyes are all dewy, and Donatello prays to any imaginary higher power that might be listening that he won’t cry, because Donnie becomes absolutely useless in all directions the second his siblings cry.

Miraculously, Raph smiles instead.

“Okay,” he says. “Raph’s listening. Loop me in.”

Actually talking about stuff changes everything—who knew?

It’s like they’ve been stuck in a boarded up room for weeks and someone finally wrestled a window open and let in a fresh breeze. All the stagnant air got swept out and they could finally breathe again.

They’re all playing along now. There are multiple levels to this deception happening all at the same time. Raph and Leo still bicker where papa can hear it, but they’re as thick as thieves at all other times. Raph is the one who makes the final call on a mission, but he makes it a point to hash things out with Leo first, so it’s really their final call. Donnie watches as Leo learns the ropes without realizing he’s learning the ropes. As Raph teaches the way he probably would have liked for someone to teach him. They meet in the middle, on each other’s team, where they belong.

If Raph is the foundation they build their lives on, Leo is the sky they reach for. Gravity was all out of whack with the two of them at odds. Donnie never wants them to fall out of orbit ever again.

They still lost the key, but it wasn’t anybody’s fault in particular. They were all playing keep-away with it to tick off Hypno and what’s-his-name, and Mikey shouted, “Go long!” and Donnie flubbed the catch. Raph called out, “I got it, I got it!” and Leo took that as a challenge because of course he did and neither of them got it. They were all laughing about it. They had no idea what that stupid key was, how were they supposed to know it was going to end the world?

Casey Jones still came back from a broken future, and Raph still got captured by the Krang, and Leo still stepped up in a big way, accepting the responsibility he never wanted and leading his family forward into certain danger because he had nowhere else to lead them.

And Leo, who knew how to stack the deck in his favor, who had never done a single thing in his life that he didn’t want to do, looked death right in the eye and told it, “I missed on purpose.”

It’s a good thing Mikey came up with that Hail Mary pass in the form of a sunlight-golden portal, because Donnie’s mind went cold. Donnie’s mind went straight back to the plans for a particle accelerator that he’d abandoned when he was thirteen years old. Donnie was fully ready to rip this goddamn universe apart to get his twin brother back.

In the infirmary Leo is happy to see everyone crammed into the room and camped around his bed, and distressingly honest, though that part is largely thanks to the morphine. Donnie puts a firm kibosh on personal questions, as tempting as it is to grill him when he’s all loopy and his constant guard is non-existent.

“I love this song,” Leo mumbles out of nowhere at two o’clock in the morning, two days after the almost-end of the world.

Mikey’s dead to the world and sprawled on Leo’s plastron, because they’ve discovered through trial and error that the immediate weight and warmth of a sibling nearby keeps the panic at bay when Leo wakes up in the dark and doesn’t know where he is right away. Casey is asleep on the other side of the bed, his head pillowed on his arms. Raph and April are in a pile on the other bed, dozing fitfully.

Donnie’s tablet is in his lap but the screen went dark with inactivity an hour ago. He’s been watching his twin sleep, deep in thought. After dinner, he’d asked S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. to play one of Leo’s favorite albums through the speakers, low enough not to wake anyone in the infirmary on its own.

Now, he says, “Yeah, I know, Nardo. I’m going to end up on the DJ blacklist right next to you with all the Taylor Swift music I’ve been forcing everyone else to endure for your benefit.”

Leo smiles. With the deep bruising on his face and neck, it looks more daring than it should, here in his little corner of the world. “Admit it, Tello. You’re a Swiftie.”

“No one will ever believe you,” Donnie says, some weight in his heart beginning to lift the longer Leo looks back at him and sounds like his old self. “How are you feeling?”

“Like hell,” Leo replies frankly. “Physical therapy is gonna be a B-word.”

“Thank you for unnecessarily censoring a word we’ve both heard a million times, I appreciate that.” Donnie leans forward, placing his tablet out of the way on a nearby overbed table, and says, “I have a question for you, now that you’re no longer lost in the sauce.”

“I bet it’s gonna suck,” Leo mutters.

“Do you still not want to lead us?” Donnie asks bluntly. “You saved the world, you know. I think it’s fair to say you’ve earned your stripes.”

Leo doesn’t answer right away. He’s drawing idle patterns on Mikey’s carapace with his good hand, staring up at the ceiling with hooded eyes.

“I learned my lesson,” he finally says. “I’ll do whatever I have to.”

Whatever he has to. Donnie relives the moment that portal closed, the moment Leo took his own life in his hands to protect his family, the moment everything that Donnie knew was ripped apart in front of his eyes, and thinks, That’s a dangerous precedent.

“Not what I asked,” Don tells him.

“It’s not about me,” Leo replies tiredly. He’s Donnie’s little brother and he sounds ancient, like he’s lived too much life already.

“I don’t know what the hell that means, but fine,” Donnie snaps. “Then it’s about me. It’s about Raph and Mikey and April and Papa. Junior, even. Everyone who loves you more than life itself. It’s about us.” He stares Leo down, daring him to break eye contact, to make light or make a joke. Donnie will climb into that bed and strangle him and no jury on earth would convict him for it. “And you’re one of us. You’re our family. So it’s about you.”

For once in his life, Leonardo is speechless. He swallows a few times, tightens his grip around Mikey, and darts a guilty look toward Raph.

“I don’t want to do it alone,” Leo admits quietly. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You’re my other half, dumb-dumb,” Donnie tells him in no uncertain terms. “You could do any crazy, stupid, impossible thing you put your mind to. But,” he adds, because this is important, and it’s something all of his siblings could stand to hear at least a dozen more times until it’s successfully been drilled into their stubborn brains, “you don’t have to. You don’t have to do anything. You’re a kid, Leo. We all are. This never should have been our problem to solve.”

Then, because he can’t bear the way his younger twin’s eyes get full and wet, he adds, “Next time a warmongering alien race tries to take over the world, I’ll just do it first.”

Leo laughs out loud, like it was surprised out of him. Raph is stirred awake by the sound, and when he sees Leo’s up, he tries to lunge out of bed so fast that April ends up on the floor. Within minutes, everyone in the room is wide awake and talking over each other and the music is drowned out by all the noise. Not even a full forty-eight hours ago, Leo was trapped in a cold, dark place, where a monster held him down and hurt him—but now he’s here and he’s safe and he can still laugh. It’s a hoarse, wheezy sound, and it’s the best thing Donnie’s heard in days.

He’s got a good feeling about tomorrow.

[multisstuff]

Choking desire?

„Do you think you can trust me enough to fulfill your desire, my dear?“ his voice is low and calm. He looks at her with nothing but kindness and love.

Y/n only manages to nod since it´s been her first time telling anyone about her `unusual´ fantasy. She looks up at him as he towers over her chair and keeps stroking her soft hair.

„Don´t worry my dear… It´s OK to be nervous, it´s your first time after all“ Y/N only manages to nod and breathe out a little „thank you“. Chrollo can only smile at her sweet reaction.

After tieing her hands and feet to the chair he gives her a reassuring smile as he can see his lover´s excitement growing „Look at you… such a good girl“ he gives her a small kiss on the forehead and starts caressing her cheek again.

„Do you also enjoy this?“ from her voice, you can hear that she is nervous and insecure. Chrollo lets out a chuckle „Of course, my dear… How could I not? You look truly gorgeous with your hands and feet tied“. „Then please continue“

Chrollo leans down and gives her a tender kiss on the lips „There´s no need to rush darling. I want you to experience everything to the fullest“. Y/n´s lover keeps giving her gentle kisses while his hand slowly makes its way to her throat. His other one is resting behind her head and strokes her hair.

When his hand reaches Y/n´s throat he softly puts his hand around it but doesn´t apply any pressure. Y/n lets out a small please against his lips and she can feel Chrollo slowly smiling as he enjoys Y/n´s begging.

Slowly but surely, he tightens his grip on her throat as he stopped kissing just so he can nibble on her ear. „thank you“ is Y/n only reaction as she closes her eyes to fully savor this moment.

„You´re welcome, my dear… I´m enjoying this very much as well… I love seeing you like this“ Chrollo then increases his grip and he hears his beloved letting out a breathless „yes“

„Yes? Is it pleasant, my dear? Should I choke you harder?“ Y/n only manages to give a little nod as she opens her mouth and shuts her eyes once again „fuck, please“ she begs.

His hand tightens a bit more this time and Y/n finds herself unable to take full breaths which only thrills her more. „Does this please you, my dear?“

Chrollo straightens up to look down at Y/n with love and feels happy to see y/n struggle. He loves seeing you like this… at his mercy. He once again leans down to your ear and whispers with the deepest and sweetest voice „Shall we take this a step further dear?“

--------------------------------

OMG i did it! My very first little oneshot? drabble? i´m sweating at the thought of uploading this huh, but I must say it was very fun writing this so i hope anybody who comes across this enjoys reading it 🫂 I also suck with titles sorryy and i hope i did the tagging right

[lautremonde1]

Please tell me if I´m Tumblring in a wrong way (serious post, I would really like to know)

A Tumblr mutual, who runs a blog I really like, wrote me yesterday asking me if I´m holding a grudge or had anything against her (I think this user is a woman). She thought that I was on purpose liking some of her original tumblr posts, but then going to other blogs to post them. Of course I didn´t do that. Rather, that I found these posts on another blogs, I liked them (and she received the notice of that like, as on Tumblr we receive notice of the likes of the posts we created even if they were not liked on our blog) and I post them (or queued them, as I queue and then random everything). I explained her that it wasn´t like that at all, and that I had nothing at all against her, on the contrary, and I think now there is no problem between us. But I wanted to explain how I proceed here, and I want to be open in case anybody at any moment has felt that I was acting against him or her.

I´m here in Tumblr in first place to relax myself from other occupations, as looking at beautiful things relax me. I´m also here to learn about music, photography, art, literature, that maybe I wouldn´t learn about in other way. In my life outside Tumblr I have also rather intellectual or artistic inclinations, I read a lot of books and magazines, I follow authors (philosophers, essayists, fiction writers, journalists...) and publishing houses in Twitter, I write (I had the luck that different publishing houses thought some of my poetry was not unpublishable, so I have four published books), I´m doing research for a PhD, I have friends with similar interests, but there are always things out of my radar, things that I discovered or learnt about here. I´m also in Twitter to spread some of the things I thought to be beautiful or interesting or thought provoking. By all this, what I mean is that I´m not here in Tumblr to have an argument with anybody. Sometimes I´ve seen that accounts I followed had an argument between each other but that kind of thing never interested me, frankly.

So, when I´m in Tumblr I post some content when I feel some suggestion from it. That may be due to a lot of factors. First, obviously the content, but then, sometimes I see something I don´t post, and that I post later or another day, so a lot of things, like my mood or the other things I´ve been posting that day, or the few ones immediately I posted previously, have an influence too. Also, when I post something, I don´t look at the origin (except if it to discover a new artist). I mean, if I see something in a blog that isn´t a mutual or I don´t even follow, even if the one posting it first was a mutual, I post it from where I found it. I think this sort of offended the person who wrote me, and of course there may be reasons to go to your mutual blog to post that if you see him or her is at the origin. But there are also reasons for what I do. If I saw this at a blog, even if it´s just a random blog, shouldn´t I be grateful to that blog for showing it to me? Doesn´t that blog has any merit for posting something I find beautiful or interesting even if the rest of the blog doesn´t interest me much? I sincerely think the answer to both questions is affirmative. So I post (or rather queue, as I queue everything, and then randomize it with the queue shuffling tool) things from where I found them.

Also, even if there are blogs I follow, and some of them are mutuals, and I´m fond of me, I don´t have a list of blogs I visit necessarily every day. I start posting from the people who posted from me the previous day, both blogs I follow and don´t follow. If someone posted from me, I should be grateful for that, and at least visit that blog. Start from the one who posted from me maybe at 11.59.59, and then I go back in time blog by blog. Maybe I´ll finish with that day, or, if that particular day what I find doing that is not too interesting, I go to my feed. Then, if the same happens, I go to the blogs I follow, but I randomize them. Maybe you know that the list of blogs you follow will be shown starting with last blog you followed at the link https://www.tumblr.com/following?offset=0, starting with the second last one at the link https://www.tumblr.com/following?offset=1, and so on, until the first one you followed. What I do is to randomize numbers with any of the many tools that are in the web for that, and then change the offset number one blog after the other.

So you can see clearly that I don´t have a go-see list of blogs. What I mean is that, even if the origin of a post is from a mutual, I´m not necessarily visiting my mutual later, it even doesn´t depend on me. I don´t like choosing whom to visit, so I let other factors to intervene. What I do with mutuals blogs or blogs I follow in general is that, when I visit them, I stay there for a little bit longer than I do in other blogs. I quit a random blog if I see that it doesn´t interest me after I see a few posts, but a blog I follow is a blog that I´ve been finding interesting in the past, probably in sustained way, so I stay there a little bit more even if at first doesn´t interest me that day. I must also say that I unfollow blogs that for several months haven´t shown any activity (I understand there are many reasons for this, and I respect them, and I will follow them again when they restart, but I don´t like having inactive or dead blogs at the list of blogs I´m following) or that I´ve been visiting several times and I didn´t like or connect with the things I saw (many times I may like the things I know but don´t feel that clic to post them myself at that moment, so it´s not about if I post from them or not). Blogs just change, I´m happy that I follow somebody and somebody follows me, but, in general, I have my friends outside Tumblr (I never unfollow the blog of somebody I´ve been talking with here, if I do it is by sheer accident, if we know each other, even if just a little bit, then there is a matter of personal loyalty, which is very important to me), and I´m here to find things beautiful, thought-provoking, interesting, suggestive, etc.

If you think I´m doing anything wrong, please tell me. I don´t pretend to be offensive to anybody but the message from this user made me think if I´m maybe being offensive or annoying to people without aknowledging.

[ravennaramos]

(Rare / long post) Yesterday was my final day of work, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't spend last night in tears.

I feel a little numb, and it feels surreal overall, that I am leaving New Orleans, and so rapidly (this Friday!)

Anybody that knows me, knows that this city comprises not only a core part of my personality, but also my identity as a whole. Since I was an eleven-year-old girl, this is the only city I've ever wanted to live. I cherish carnival season, the brass bands, the above-ground cemeteries, and the streetcar that I can hear from my living room. I have five New Orleans tattoos. I adore the crescent city, and I am grieving its loss as thoroughly and deeply as any loss in my life.

But when I look back to the summer of 2016, as I was preparing to load up our 15-foot U-Haul and commence the 1,000 mile journey southward, arriving on NOLA's doorstep homeless and jobless, I can't say that I thought I would live here forever. I can't say that I saw myself living here until I was 90, weaving the decades together in a single continuous unbroken thread of Mardi Gras and hurricane seasons and Mr. Bingles. If anything, perhaps I didn't expect to live in one flat for seven years straight, the longest I've lived at one address since I was a child in my mother's care. And I certainly didn't expect to level up the way that I have professionally, starting out as a cashier in the French Quarter for $13/hour, and ending up with a shiny new graduate degree and a wage offer nearly three times that. New Orleans has simultaneously been a loving benefactor and a cruel mistress.

I think that, more than most, COVID really broke me. I didn't realize it back in 2020, or even 2021, but it is clear now. I never stopped quarantining. Sure I leave my house for work, and making groceries, and the few beauty appointments that I schedule. But I walked out of the Quarter when I lost my job on March 19, 2020, and did not tiptoe back inside its boundaries until four weeks ago on August 12th. The few friendships that germinated here died unceremoniously over that time, due to my lack of attention, and I was unable to nurture them back to life. I don't really go anywhere, I don't really do anything. The last three years haven't been a waste; I've worked meticulously on myself, my physical and spiritual health, my emotional and professional growth. But I feel that I've come to the end of being able to move forward in this city, at this time. I have to force myself out of this cycle of working and coming home to an apartment I'm renting alone. Home ownership, international travel, a marriage, a family, a doctoral degree, career growth, ain't gonna manifest itself.

In many ways, I never got used to being back in the Southeast of my childhood. I never got used to hurricane season, or the streets flooding with every single goddamn rainstorm, or the potholes that blew out my left front tire. I never got used to the sewage & water board neglecting to read my water meter for over two years now (they send estimated bills). I never got used to AT&T's 18mbps internet, the fastest I can get here. I never got over Hurricane Ida, or the Hard Rock Hotel collapse. As a child I would scream and cry at the sight of a flying cockroach; I still do. And I sure as fuck have never gotten used to this unrelenting godforsaken heat, the hottest summer in New Orleans ever on record, 52+ days of excessive heat warnings thus far. Inadvertently, I'm donning the label of climate change refugee. Everyone here will, a hundred years from now. 

My relationship with New Orleans is complex and complicated. I'm sure that I will cry while packing up my things and perhaps all the way to the eastern seaboard. İn şa Allah, I will try again here in the future, perhaps retire here when I can acquire such luxuries as central air, a dishwasher, a parking spot, a washer and dryer. For now, my blossoming must continue within the funny-shaped border of the beautiful blue state of Maryland. I am ready for a beginning.  

I love you, New Orleans

[hopelesslyinlovegirl]

I like computers more than people

It´s 2010. I´m five years old, in kindergarten. I just lied to my teacher that last class i painted in the classroom, so this time I had to go to quiet games.

Quiet games was my favorite place back then. There weren´t many kids (just another boy that i haven´t seen in at least 10 years) and the games were just relaxing and peaceful. We would play domino together, and then go each their way for the afternoon meal.

My other friends of kindergarten liked going to the house place. It was crowded and honestly didn´t particularly enjoyed it. I always felt apart, for some reason.

It´s 2015. My parents got called in school because I didn´t socialise much. Quiet games now was the school library. I would spend my recess there, reading my silly little kid books, ignoring everything else. Reading was something I had really grown fond of.

The other girls in my class didn´t like reading that much. They liked going out for afternoon tea or for some pizza in someone´s house. I had always wanted that, but I wasn´t invited. So I kept it in the back of my mind and pretended I didn´t care. I knew people talked behind my back. And I knew that, likely, in their reunions they wouldn´t say exactly nice things about me. I had my books, that´s all i needed.

It´s 2018. I have a few new friends, I get invited to do things from time to time. But something weird happens, that will be repeated even to this day and that kills me inside. They would suddenly act different. They don´t seem to be my friends or seem to like me.

And I do not understand. Yesterday, everything was fine. Now, they don´t talk to me. Did I do something wrong? I travel inside of my mind, looking for something that could have offended them in order for this to happen.

I can´t find anything.

It´s 2021. Until now, it has been the best year of my life. But there is something that saddened me back then. I had seen the girls in my class talking, watching me and laughting then. I remember thinking that, maybe if I was the one in their place, I would have laughed too.

And that´s when it hit me. I wasn´t part of a niche group of friends who would hang out all the time, get out partying, have a groupchat, have internal jokes. I was just kinda... there. It saddened me realizing that i´m not the first choice of anybody. But maybe I deserve it. If all my tries to get closer to other people always ended up in me feeling insecure because i "noticed them different" it´s not their fault.

I am the problem. I am the one who, when feeling that they don´t like me anymore, isolates. I am the one who didn´t invite, because i didn´t feel invited.

If i hadn´t been so in my head, so insecure, would things be different now? Would I have been successful in my first day of uni making friends?

Because even now, march 2023 it´s all happening again. I feel like my residence friends don´t like me. That they laugh about me, when i´m not there. That they kinda ignore me. i hate feeling like this.

There are very few people who make me feel like I belong when I´m with them. One is probably reading this, right here.

But that´s the main problem. I feel i don´t belong almost everywhere, in almost every situation that is presented to me. I don´t have friends in uni. I feel like I don´t have friends now in my residence, who i have talked to. Maybe i´m being dramatic, and this is all a product of all the mental load from past human relationships that hurt me that make me overthink. But maybe i´m right.

Maybe that´s why I chose my major. Every time that I say it, I say the same joke: "i like computers more than people"

But i think now that is not so much of a joke.

[freewilllife]

I don’t know whether you have Twitter but the most baffling thing I’ve heard about mq discourse in a while is that once he isn’t poor, he becomes classist against XL. And their reasoning was mq judging XL for eating moldy bun (cause god forbid mq AND fx doesn’t want their PRINCE to eat dirty food) and him being smug about XL living in a worn down shrine. Forget about the genuine complexity of his feelings toward XL in which he cares for him but also resent the social class difference and thinking that he’s nothing but a charity case to XL and that mq WANTED to save all of them by siding with the 33 gods but XL rejected his help. So yeah mq’s smug about being right (being right that xl should have accepted his help) and yes it is awful for MQ to feel that way no one is saying it isn’t (and from a capitalistic lens, yes it’s classist of MQ to think people choose to be in poverty) but yeah sure let’s go ahead and reduce all those complexity of their relationship into just mq being classist back once hes wealthy 💓 forget about how even 800 years later, mq first instinct is to comtinue to protect XL as his Prince lol.

Lord…when I say these folks don’t understand how class works in a feudal society.. and no it’s not based on just your social economic position but based on your birth. Heck, even modern society there’s still some remnants of it. Why a poor duchess isnt the same thing as being a poor sweeper in the UK. But i digress.

Oh! Mq was also… hmm lets see… classist against Hong’er for calling out his lie that he was a beggar 😂😂 idk how calling out someone lie is the example of being classist when it is genuine observation based on his familarity with all the poor orphan kids MQ has fed. also MQ was classist for suspecting Hong’er to be a yongan spy. Oh? You know Xl was also suspecting the same thing. Based on that metric, is xl also classist for suspecting honger is a yongan spy? Personally, none of them were. Because it is a fucking warzone. You cant trust anybody. But its astonishing to list that out as an example of classims. Im not even gonna touch kicking honger out of the army. They can intepret whatever they like for that lol.

But worms for brains… not only do people don’t have reading comprehension, but people are just throwing words at the wall and see which of it sticks.

.

mq discourse in a while is that once he isn’t poor, he becomes classist against XL. And their reasoning was mq judging XL for eating moldy bun (cause god forbid mq AND fx doesn’t want their PRINCE to eat dirty food) and him being smug about XL living in a worn down shrine. Forget about the genuine complexity of his feelings toward XL in which he cares for him but also resent the social class difference and thinking that he’s nothing but a charity case to XL and that mq WANTED to save all of them by siding with the 33 gods but XL rejected his help.

Sorry for the very late reply. Xie Lian is literally the Crown Prince and Mu Qing the general that is mocked for being his former servant.

Yes, Mu Qing is happy that Xie Lian experiences at times a little bad luck...yet most people don´t read that he was actually more horrified that Xie Lian lived like this and only a small part was happy about it.

And like you have written...MQ tried to de-escalate the situation by gving in to the 33 gods...or they both would have beaten bloody and Mu Qing could have lost his position and that Xie Lian´s pride wasn´t worth that.

So yeah mq’s smug about being right (being right that xl should have accepted his help) and yes it is awful for MQ to feel that way no one is saying it isn’t (and from a capitalistic lens, yes it’s classist of MQ to think people choose to be in poverty)

Mu Qing literally is from a lower class, so he knows that people do not choose to be poor.

In fact, he blames Xie Lian´s good luck for it.

It is however different with Xie Lian: Xie Lian did indeed choose poverty, as he knew the consequences, when he failed. Yet he did think he could do the impossible.

I agree that Mu Qing accepts the class system, but so does Xie Lian. He has had never anything against Mu Qing and Feng Xin being his servants. I don´t understand, why Mu Qing´s classism is a topic, while the greater classism of Xie Lian is completely overlooked.

Oh! Mq was also… hmm lets see… classist against Hong’er for calling out his lie that he was a beggar

Mu Qing merely mentioned that Hong did lie, that he had nobody, since he recognized that his clothes had been mended...as he was pretty young this was likely his mother. Mu Qing cared very much for his own mother, so he literally thought that Hong has run away from home.

That was before he heard that Hong was abused at home..

Im not even gonna touch kicking honger out of the army. They can intepret whatever they like for that lol.

It would be one of the rare times, that they are -partly-right. Mu Qing was afraid of losing his position. He was jealous of Hong, but also so very afraid.

And that is literally thanks for Mu Qing being a person of a lower class. Classism plays a role, yet it is Mu Qing, who showed one of his bad sides, and was more a victim than a perperator. The one hovering over both is the Crown Prince, after all.

[daydreamerdrew]

Comics read this past week:

Marvel Comics:

Iron Man (1968) #95-103

In this batch of Iron Man issues I went from November 1976 to July 1977, according to the Marvel Wiki. These were 17-page stories. Issues #95-97 were plotted by Gerry Conway and scripted by Bill Mantlo and issues #98-103 were written by Bill Mantlo. All of the issues were penciled by George Tuska. Issues #95-98 were inked by Don Perlin and issues #99-103 were inked by Mike Esposito, with Pablo Marcos inking a 2-page flashback in issue #102. And issues #95-97 and #101 were colored by Don Warfield, issue #98 by Roger Silfer, issues #99 and #102-103 by Phil Rachelson, and issue #100 was colored by Janice Cohen.

In issue #95 Tony says, “Next time whoever wants to strike at me through my friends and employees might not stop at taking them hostage! Unless I can make it seem that Tony Stark is as cold and unfeeling as the armor he wears. Just a callous millionaire playboy!”

At the end of issue #95 the heart attack that had been teased by Tony having conspicuous dizzy spells throughout the preceding batch of issues finally happened. He says, “Don’t… understand! Armor held- But I feel so… weak! So dizzy! Got to pull myself together! Come on, Avenger! You’re no novice! There’s a job to be done and- No good! Can’t… stand! Even getting hard to think straight! So… tired! Heart’s pounding… Heart?! No, it can’t be! It-” before dramatically losing consciousness. At the beginning of issue #96 he’s rescued by Jasper Sitwell who pulls him onto a jetcraft and flies him away from the fight. When Tony wakes up his armor has been plugged into the ship’s battery and he says that that’s good specifically because he’ll need that power for the fight. Sitwell protests, saying that, “You look- and sound- like death warmed over- and it’s not going to do anybody any good to watch you throw your life away in a suicide attack on Ultimo!” He tells Iron Man, “I know how you feel, sir. Inaction, for men of our calling, is often harder than to bear than the deadliest of battles!” But then says that’s he’s realized that, “Success lies in teamwork, and not in individual acts of glory!” Tony’s response: “Teamwork is fine in its place, but there are just some things a man’s got to do alone!” Right after this he thinks to himself, “Who am I kidding? Since I recharged in the jetcraft my armor is back up to fighting strength- but the man inside still feels like a wrung-out dishrag from that pain and dizziness a few minutes ago. It was almost as if- No! Mustn’t even think that!” Then throughout the fight he has to be conscious of his weakened state, for example, saying, “Have to engage armor’s cooling system! I can’t afford to have the change in temperature trigger the dizzy spells- not now!” In issue #97 Tony has another heart attack when he’s attacked before he has had the time to properly recover from his last fight. He thinks, “But… lack of power to armor… shouldn’t… cause p-pain! Not unless the strain- were taxing my heart! But… that’s impossible! My damaged heart was replaced by a synthetic organ! I-It can’t give out! I’m cured! Uhhh! G-Go on, Stark! Lie here g-gasping your l-life away like a fish out of water- a-and tell yourself again how you can’t possibly be having a heart attack! Tell yourself how well you are! G-Go on, m-mister- t-tell…” He manages to crawl (as well as fall down a flight of stairs) to a place where he can plug himself in, but he asks himself, “Will the pain return each time I neglect to recharge? Will the shock cause my body to finally reject my synthetic heart? Am I once again a prisoner inside the golden armor of Iron Man?”

In the opening of issue #98 Tony has been awake for 48 hours working on a version of the suit that’s more streamlined for the purpose of having to power his heart and has accepted that he will once again have to wear a chestplate all of the time. During this he is ignoring a congressional subpeona regarding suspicions that he had sold the U.S. defective weapons systems and that he’d been selling weapons to the U.S.’s enemies. Tony thinks to himself, “I- I don’t dare appear before that committee! Not until I know my chestplate will keep my heart from failing again!” This really stood out to me because of the way that Tony’s heart problems were first revealed to the public after he had gone to such lengths to keep them a secret, which was that he had a heart attack in front of congress while testifying in response to a subpeona about Iron Man’s secret identity in Tales of Suspense (1959) #84 and while he was unconscious on the ground his shirt was opened and the reporters there took pictures of his chestplate.

In issue #98 Krissy Longbottom, who first appeared in issue #91, is implied for the first time to secretly be Whitney Frost, also known as Madame Masque. Up until this point she had been straightforwardly portrayed as Tony’s secretary so I suspect that this is an invention of Bill Mantlo’s. The villain Midas reveals her real identity to Iron Man in issue #103, explaining that she had been defending Tony by hindering his plot to legally take over Tony’s company up until that point. Back in issue #95 Tony had thought, “Good woman, Krissy. She doesn’t let the turmoil around Stark International throw her for a minute! But there’s been a lot of good women in your life, haven’t there, Tony? Maybe it’s time for a new one… No! If it isn’t bad enough that I’ve started acting like a living advertisement for ‘Nostalgia Illustrated’- I’ve even forgotten my decision not to allow myself to get involved with-” Tony’s immediate response to the revelation is, “NO! Everything taken from me- even her! Nothing left- because of you!!” This is confusing to Midas, who says, “Really, sir! I should think Mr. Stark- your employer- is the one who has lost all! Not you!” Whitney tells Iron Man, “It is just we two now, Iron Man! I… Can we not… help each other?” Tony says nothing but picks her up and flies off with her and the narration says that, “He knows not what he will do- but he needs someone beside him! Above all else, he needs not to be alone!”

The Incredible Hulk (1968) #260-266

Within the main The Incredible Hulk book I went from March 1981 to September 1981, according to the Marvel Wiki. These were 21-page stories. Issue #260 was plotted by Sal Buscema and scripted by Bill Mantlo, issues #261-262 were written by Bill Mantlo, and issues #263-266 were plotted by Sal Buscema and Bill Mantlo then scripted by Bill Mantlo. Issue #260 was penciled by Sal Buscema and inked by Sal Buscema, Sal Trapani, Frank Giacoia, Walter Simonson, Marie Severin, and Bruce Patterson. The rest of the issues were drawn by Sal Buscema. And issues #260-261 and #264-266 were colored by Bob Sharen, issue #262 by Barry Grossman, and issue #263 was colored by Bob Sharen and Don Warfield.

In issue #260, which takes place in Tokyo, Glenn Talbot finally catches up to the Hulk. I was surprised that the fight between them was only one issue because it had been built up to for awhile. Glenn Talbot apparently dies at the end of the fight. Of more interest to me was the Hulk’s relationship with a Buddha statue throughout the issue. The Hulk was walking through a forest saying, “Hulk only wants to find someplace where he can rest, eat… and be left alone,” when he found it. He says, “Hunh! Little statue is green… like Hulk! Statue cannot eat- yet puny humans bring statue food! They must be afraid of statue like they are afraid of Hulk! Maybe it is because Hulk and statue are both green? Yes, that is it! Hulk and statue are on the same side!” He decides, “Hulk will stay here, hiding in the forest and eat the food the puny humans bring to the statue! This is a good place to be green!” This is when Talbot attacks him. The Hulk becomes upset that, “Golden ship has hurt Hulk- and turned forest of the green statue to ashes!” He says to the statue, “Green statue is alright? Hulk was afraid golden ship had hurt you! Do not be afraid! Hulk will protect you!” And then, “The ground cracks, smoke hisses up from below- but Hulk will not let anything happen to you, little green friend!” At the end of the issue the Hulk says to an old man, who he had recognized as also on the same side as him because he was also trying to protect a Buddha statue, “Take care of this place! It made Hulk feel good!”

In issue #261 Bruce gets a job at a clinic under a false name where very suspiciously the administrator’s son is kept drugged and locked up because he keeps trying to escape, believing that he’s adopted and that his so-called parents are actually aliens. Bruce is uncomfortable with this, but then it’s revealed that the son is actually adopted, though it is he and not his parents that is the alien, when his medications aren’t adequately administered, allowing him to change into his true form and remember what he is. The father explains, “We never told him- but physical changes at puberty made Mark suspect a difference between us and him!” Bruce is triggered to transform into the Hulk by the alien son attacking them all but during the fight the parents intervene. The father says, “Hulk, whatever that creature is- wherever he comes from- my wife and I raised him as our son!” The mother says, “We- We can’t stop loving him just because he’s different… just because he’s bad!” The Hulk is confusing by this, saying that, “Boy is not boy! Boy is monster!” This enrages the father, who asks, “Who are you to call my son a monster?!” In the end the Hulk jumps away, distraught and agreeing that, “Hulk is nothing but a monster!”

In issue #262 the Hulk sees two people with earth powers, Avalanche and Landslide, fighting and thinks, “There are two earth-movers, but their battle is not with the Hulk! Good! Let them destroy each other! But Hulk will leave this place…!” But coincidentally Betty Ross and Rick Jones are also there and are endangered by the fight. Betty sees the Hulk and calls out to him for help. The narration describes, “He has known her- and loved her- in both aspects of his identity. Though time has taken them down different paths, the Hulk has never forgotten Betty Ross.” The Hulk questions why he should help when “every time the Hulk tries to help, he is attacked… called a monster” but the narration says, “In his heart, the Hulk already knows the answer. For Rick. For Betty.” At the end of the issue, after the Hulk has rescued a plane full of people and taken down the instigating villain, he is still targeted by the police, which the Hulk recognizes as what always happens to him. Betty tells him, “You’re right, Hulk! They’ll never understand! They’ll never even try!”

In issue #263 the Hulk tells Rick and Betty that, “All Hulk wants is to be left alone, to find peace, to live someplace where Banner can’t find Hulk!” He explains, “Hulk knows now that it is Banner who hunts Hulk- who hounds Hulk- who torments Hulk even in Hulk’s sleep!” Rick says, “We’re your friends, Hulk- and Doc Banner’s friends! We know the pain both of you have experienced! We want to help free you both!” The Hulk asks, “Free Hulk from Banner?” And Betty says, “Yes, Hulk- and free Bruce Banner from you!” Once the Hulk transforms back into Bruce the group attempts to make their way to one of Bruce’s old abandoned desert laboratories, where Rick and Betty will help keep Bruce from turning back into the Hulk while Bruce works to try to finally cure himself of the Hulk. In issue #266 they are attacked by the High Evolutionary who wants to commit suicide but is unable to because his armor keeps protecting him, so he purposely goads the Hulk into fighting him in order to have his armor destroyed. At the end of the issue the Hulk says, “He made Hulk help him get what he wanted by placing Hulk’s friends in danger! Hulk should hate him, but all Hulk feels is sorry! All he wanted with all his power was to find a way to die! All Hulk wants to do with all his power is to find a way to live! Living is harder, Hulk thinks- but better than dying!” It is unfortunate then that the compassionate approach taken by the Hulk’s friends, in comparison to the approach taken by the antagonists to capture or kill the Hulk, is to try to cure Bruce of the Hulk, which I feel is paramount to killing the Hulk, rather than having anyone actually working to try to find a way for the Hulk to live.

The Defenders (1972) #92-97

In this batch of The Defenders issues I went from November 1980 to April 1981, according to the Marvel Wiki. These were 22-page stories. All were written by J. M. DeMatteis, and the breakdowns for the art of all of the issues were drawn by Don Perlin. The art of issue #92 was finished by Pablo Marcos; issue #93 by Joe Sinnott, Al Milgrom, Frank Giacoia, and Mike Esposito; issue #94 by Joe Sinnott and Al Milgrom; issue #95 by Joe Sinnott, Al Milgrom, and Frank Giacoia; issue #96 by Joe Sinnott and Sal Trapani; and the art of issue #97 was finished by Joe Sinnott, Sal Trapani, and Jack Abel. And all of the issues were colored by George Roussos.

This is the beginning of the new writer’s run and I am unfortunately really not liking it. Dr. Strange is now the leader of the Defenders again even though he has long since left the team. He has consistently worked with them since then on occasional special missions, but no reason is given for why he’s now so willing to be regularly involved. And his home is now being used as the Defenders’ base even though it was accurately said in issue #91 that he’s not “keen on having the Defenders as permanent guests” because it was too hectic for him back when they previously were. Also in issue #91 there was a full page spread of a map of the area surrounding Patsy’s mother’s home that Patsy inherited when she died, as that was becoming the Defenders’ new base. This was captioned: “Note to Defenders devotees: Be sure not to misplace this priceless map, because we’re sure you’ll want to refer to it from time to time during future non-team epics!” This house burned down in issue #94. Also, in issue #91 Patsy talked about her conflicts with her mom regarding her making Patsy a child model and then writing teenage romance comics based on Patsy. In issue #95 Patsy learns that before her mother died she made a deal with a demon promising Patsy to him in an attempt to extend her life, which I felt brought a much less interesting element to that conflict. In issue #93 it was revealed that Kyle is now paralyzed and in issue #95 it was revealed that he’s actually only paralyzed during the day, which I am frustrated by because it’s such a drastic change to his character when I had liked him before. In issue #92 the character Hellstrom, the Son of Satan, who last worked with the Defenders in issue #25, becomes a recurring character again, which would be fine but unfortunately he replaces the Hulk on the highlighted characters box on the cover starting with issue #94. The Hulk was only in the first two issues of this batch and I didn’t think that his portrayal was a good Hulk characterization, it leaned too far into making the Hulk child-like, which was surprising to me because I didn’t have any issues with the depiction of the Hulk in the The Hulk! (1978) story I read written by J. M. DeMatteis last week. There overall isn’t, I think, a very strong continuity to the depiction of the relationships within the Defenders. For example, the Hulk exclusively referred to Dr. Strange as “dumb magician” when the Defenders first formed in Marvel Feature (1971) #1 up until The Defenders #12 when he finally accepted that Dr. Strange was really his friend and has since just called him “magician.” And overtime the Hulk has become more cooperative with Dr. Strange and grown to respect him. However, even though he still considers him a friend and works well with him, the Hulk is now inexplicably back to calling Dr. Strange “dumb magician” again. Also a brand new character, the Gargoyle, joins the team in issue #94, who I really don’t care for and wish wasn’t there.

the Black Widow story in Bizarre Adventures (1981) #25

When I started reading Black Widow comics I started with her first self-titled solo series, Black Widow (1999), having already read her earliest appearances in Tales of Suspense (1959) and not being interested in reading Avengers or Daredevil comics, where I believe she primarily appeared after that. I hadn’t realized that she had a few solo stories within anthology comics. This 22-page black-and-white story was published in January 1981, according to the Marvel Wiki. It was written by Ralph Macchio and drawn by Paul Gulacy.

In this story Natasha was given the assignment by S.H.I.E.L.D. to kill one of her old teachers, Irma Klausvichnova, to which she thinks, “I’m not looking forward to this, Irma, but business is business.” Right after this it’s shown that Irma has been killed and replaced with a lookalike named Stacy Cromwell by S.H.I.E.L.D. that’s leaking data to them and thinks, “Strange… Normal procedure in such an operation would be to overrun the fortress- not pussyfoot around like this. The front office must have its reasons, though. Mine is not to question why…” From the perspective on a third spying person we see that Natasha’s intended contact, Raymond Bishop, sees but does not speak to her. Natasha is able to board the train that will take her to where Irma is anyway and it’s while there that Bishop makes contact. He tells her that it was a test to see if she would still be able to do it. She asks why she should accept that explanation and he says, “For the same reason you accept anything else in this business.” Natasha fills in, “I have no choice.”

When Natasha confronts “Irma,” saying that she was sent there to kill her, Stacy is initially in disbelief. Natasha says, “We once worked for the same organization… Shared the same goals- that’s changed now. Though I won’t ever forget what you-” Stacy, thinking that Natasha has defected back to the Soviet Union, cuts her off, saying, “Then you’ve- You’ve gone over to the other side. You’re not with us any longer.” Natasha, thinking that she’s just now learning about her original defection from the Soviet Union to the United States, says, “Not for some time now. And I would have thought you’d have known that. You, of all people.” Rather than Natasha, it is Bishop that shoots and kills Stacy from behind. He then goes to kill Natasha as well, but then he too is shot and killed from behind, this being done by the man that Natasha had slept with at the beginning of the story before she’d gotten her assignment, Langley, who is also the unknown figure had been spying on her earliest.

Langley explains to Natasha that the entire situation was a ploy to see if Bishop had gone over to the other side. Natasha wasn’t intended to reach the false Irma before Bishop and Bishop had actually been told that S.H.E.I.LD. had replaced Irma with Stacy, so the plan was for the chaos of the situation to give Bishop the opportunity to kill Stacy if that’s what his loyalties led him to do. Bishop was also told that Natasha was suspected of being a traitor on the chance that he would let his guard down with her under the belief that they were both secretly on the same side. Langley tells Natasha, as an explanation as to why she was told her mission was to kill someone that was secretly a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, “We couldn’t deviate from standard procedure in this case and arouse your suspicions. Bishop might have been alerted if you acted strangely.” Natasha says, “And were you there in the shadows long enough to save Cromwell’s life- or did she have to die so you could be certain about Bishop, you miserable bastard?” Langley’s response: “Take it easy. You know the final word- we all do. Everyone’s expendable. Everyone.”

Natasha still questions, “How do I really know it’s all true, Langley. How do I know that this Irma’s really an imposter… Or that you and Bishop weren’t working together and got turned on him for some reason? Can I ever be certain you didn’t really want me to kill this woman?” And her final question is, “How do I know- you’re not a double-agent?” The answer is a resounding: “You don’t.” And the ending of the story is Langley hysterical, apparently buckling under the weight of the subterfuge he orchestrated.

The lesson that Natasha is meant to learn seems really similar to what she tries to teach Yelena Belova in Black Widow (1999) and Black Widow (2001). In the 2008 book she tells Yelena, who wants to be the Black Widow, “You learn to be lost all the time, so as to never be able to direct anyone to your employers. Or your heart. Or your vulnerabilities. And for what, rooskaya, for what? To play pawn to any one of a dozen governments that will shoot you in the back just for becoming the dispassionate creature they require?” And in the 2001 book Natasha tells Yelena, as an explanation of her own plot that psychologically tormented Yelena, “I wanted you to understand, finally, what it meant to be a spy. We are not like Daredevil or the others, Yelena. We are not heroes. We are tools. And tools get used.” I was also reminded of the ending of Black Widow: Pale Little Spider (2002), a book starring Yelena, when regarding a plot to manipulate Yelena into being a better Black Widow, one of the key participants said, “She truly loved Colonel Starkovsky, General. If she ever learns that this was all an exercise, that we were responsible for his death, she could go rogue. You’ll have to kill her.” The General responded, “If it comes to that, Captain. We can always make another Black Widow.”

Fawcett Comics:

the Captain Marvel stories in Whiz Comics (1940) #74 and Captain Marvel Adventures (1941) #60-61

In this batch of 10 Captain Marvel stories I read through the Captain Marvel appearances in May 1946, according to the issue cover dates. These stories ranged from 7 to 11 pages.

The story “Billy’s Big Day” (writer unknown; possibly drawn by Pete Constanza) in Captain Marvel Adventures #60 has Billy unable to call on Captain Marvel after being tripped and chipping his tooth, giving him a heavy lisp, while running an errand for Sterling Morris. He plans on going to a dentist to get his tooth fixed but is determined to finish the errand first. Throughout the story there were many times Billy was prompted to call on Captain Marvel and then was forced to resolve the situation by himself. Halfway throughout the story Captain Marvel appears as an astral projection behind Billy, saying, “That was quick thinking, Billy! You’re getting along fine without me! I’m proud of you!” And Billy says, “I feel as though Capt. Marvel’s spirit is hovering around, giving me moral support!” And at the end of the story, errand successfully completed, Billy says, “I’m sort of… well… proud of myself! I delivered that packet, against all kinds of hazards, without the help of Capt. Marvel! This was my big day!”

the Mary Marvel stories in The Marvel Family (1945) #4-9 and #13

When I was previously reading through the Mary Marvel solo stories in Wow Comics (1941) and Mary Marvel (1945), I was skipping the Mary Marvel solo stories in The Marvel Family, which is an anthology book that contains both family team-ups and solo stories. So I thought I would go back and read those missed The Marvel Family solo stories before continuing on with her Wow Comics and Mary Marvel appearances. In this batch of 7 Mary Marvel stories I went from September 1946 to July 1947, according to the issue cover dates. These stories ranged from 7 to 9 pages.

The story “Mary Marvel Becomes a Fairy Godmother” (creators unknown) in The Marvel Family #5 is a spoof on the Cinderella fairy tale. In it Mary Marvel comes across and rescues a girl named Ella who was being abused by her stepfather because he didn’t want her going to a party. Afterwards Ella tells Mary Marvel that she still can’t go to the party because all she has to wear is rags, so Mary Batson gives Ella one of her own dresses and has her driven their in her family’s limousine. In the end it’s revealed that Ella is actually the daughter of a kind wealthy man and her “stepfather” had kidnapped her as a baby to bring her up as his drudge. This revelation gives Mary Marvel the allowance to bring the “stepfather” to jail, because him being arrested won’t reflect badly on Ella anymore. The story ends with Ella, depicted with a Cinderella storybook, saying, “It was just as if Mary Marvel was my fairy godmother! And even my Prince Charming showed up- my own dear Daddy!”

The story “Mary Marvel and the Quizzical Crook” (written by Bill Woolfolk; possibly drawn by Pete Constanza) in The Marvel Family #6 takes place at Billy Batson’s workplace, Station Whiz. The reason for this is that Billy’s boss, Sterling Morris, has asked Mary to fill in for Billy’s usual broadcast. The reason why Billy can’t make it is difficult to make out due to the quality of the fiche scan. Mary says, “But- But I’ve never been on the radio!” But Mr. Morris tells her, “It’ll make a great human interest story! Sister taking brother’s place in an emergency! You’ll be terrific!” After the news broadcast Mary also helps with, and foils a scheme to cheat at, a quiz show.

[noellefan101]

Kissing them series : Honkai Star Rail 2

(i forgor the thing, and i don´t know how to get it back, help omg, i think i did it tho)

Characters: Arlan, Kafka, Silverwolf, Welt,

Summary:

Warnings: ooc, kissing, characters that are deemed under 18 are aged up, or you´re aged down/up(depends on your age), why didn´t i just say that they're the same age as you(im stupid thas why)

Note: these are hard for hsr, bc they don´t have many voice lines abt food or anything they like tasting wise, + im too lazy to update and actually play the game, love you

*'Arlan

he tastes like lip balm, his is a little fruity, so its sweet maybe thats one of the reasons you use it instead of your own, other than its his. one thing you did know though; his jackets are comfy, you´d know.

*'Kafka

she tastes like a fine wine, she doesn´t drink it very often but of course she wants the finer things in life at least once in a while. sometimes you can sense a bit of blood that might have gotten in her mouth.

*'Silverwolf

she tastes like chips, you don’t know what kind, but it’s sweet and salty, kind of remind you of her, sweet with you but mean and salty with anyone else. She didn’t even want to talk to you when her accounts got hacked.

*'Welt

he tastes like coffee, a bitter one too, but surprisingly rather sweet, it’s not that you think it doesn’t suit him, no it just wasn’t something you thought he would taste like. You once kissed him after he drank Himeko’s coffee, you don’t even want to remember.

Thank you for reading hope it was ok, luv ya-Masterlist

You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts

[lovelytsunoda]

graduation day // mick schumacher

summary: his girlfriend graduated college, and mick has never been more proud in his life.

author’s note: it;s graduation season where i am, and its got me feeling very emotional, especially knowing that it’s gonna be my trn to walk across that stage next year with my little pre-law certificate in hand.

he definitely wakes up early, the ceremony starts at ten and his gf needs to be there for eight thirty

i’m talking like a six am wake up call complete with breakfast in bed

pancakes, powdered sugar, chocolate milk, a little bowl of strawberries

“mick, babe, this is incredible, but there’s no way i can eat it all”

mick probably hand picked her dress, going through every single one in the walk-in-closet before he just decided to go out and get her a new one

crisp white, matching the red silk grad robes.

definitely invited every single person he knows to come and watch the ceremony

so in addition to y/n’s parents and siblings, gina and corinna are there

and, shockingly, so is guenther steiner himself

“mick kept sending me emails, what was i supposed to say?” the austrian would insist

but really he just wanted to be there for mick. and he had a soft sport for the driver’s girlfriend

it seemed like the least he could do to thank y/n for sticking by mick;s side for the season

when y/n walks across the stage, mick cheers the loudest

gina had to stop him form getting out the little sign he had made

“mick, you don;t want to embarrass the poor girl!”

“but i want the world to know how proud i am!”

“save it for instagram, lover boy.”

definitley takes 254856326987456 pictures afterwards

directing y/n how to pose, taking pictures of her on her own, getting gina to take pictures of the two of them, one with y/n and all of her family

“mick, you have enough pictures!”

“no i don’t! the world needs to know that i’m dating the best paralegal on the planet!”

“i don;t even have the job yet, baby. it;s just a piece of paper until then.”

“don’t care, you will be the best. and the hottest.”

gushing on instagram about how proud he is with the longest caption anybody has ever had to read

tons of comments from other drivers about how whipped he is

fans thinking its the most adorable shit ever to be seen on earth

taking her out for a nice dinner afterwards, sharing a decadent slice of cake or two for dessert

going out into the backyard of the ranch, bottle of champagne in hand

“mick, babes, what are we doing?

“celebrating the formula one way!” he would be grinning like a fool, holding the bottle of ferrari trento, the same champagne used at the races

and that’s how they ended up having a champagne shower in the middle of mick’s backyard, bubbles and foam spraying everywhere and soaking through clothes

champagne lingering on both of their tongues as they kiss each other, mick’s hands bunching up her dress as they kiss, soft moans exchanged on either side

“what do you say we hop in the shower,” mick begins seductively, trailing his tongue up the side of y/n’s neck, gathering every last drop of the champagne. “have a little fun and wash the champagne off, then climb into bed and i show you just how much i love you and exactly how proud i am?”

“race you there, lover boy.”

[aroaceconfessions]

i used to be a huge k-pop fan back when i was still in high school, and i picked up and used some of the fan-phrasings from the internet and the posts i read (because prior to k-pop i never gave a shite about any celebrity). nothing weird, i just liked to jokingly say stuff like "yeah, i wanna marry him", or "he´s my future husband", or stuff like that, but i never actually meant anything of that. not only because i am aroace but also because how the heck would i know if he´s really gonna be a great husband? i know nothing but his idol persona and he´s basically a grown-ass stranger, so. stranger-danger, people, is not just a nice rhyme.

but at some point i realized that people actually meant what they said, when they spoke about having their idols as boyfriends or whatever, and it made me super uncomfortable? not only since their idols could be serial killers for all they know, but also because it made it clear to me that the people around me actually believed me when i said shit about wanting to marry my idols.

so i started dialing the comments back, and telling people that i don´t actually think that way, but they really just brushed me and my words off and continued to take all my comments about the idols and i.e. the way they look when they dance in the most "dirty" way possible. they made it seem like i liked the idols just for the thirst traps they were supposed to be (i don´t even get the concept of thirst traps), and that made me stop talking about the idols all together, because what use is there to keep repating myself when they´re just going to conveniently misunderstand me, anyway?

(just ending on the note that that´s not the reason i stopped listening to k-pop, in case anybody assumed)

[gotfunny]

Well first of all she's not being mistreated, she is the one harassing Sasuke who made it clear since the first arc that he is not interested in her romantic advances.

He did mistreat her, because he did not care about her and most likely in order to make her understand that he is disinterested. Therefore I cannot understand, why you would bother if the girl would grow a spine. Sakura does deserve better,though, because every person and every girl does not need to be mistreated.

She doesn't deserve better, because this is what she wanted.

Sakura doesn´t want to be mistreated, or ignored. So this relationship is not, what she wanted. I cannot understand, how you can clearly show her being unhappy and still claim this is what she wanted.

She had multiple instances to back off, and she didn't. The best thing for her would have been, as anon said, realizing her feelings are not mutual and stopping to victimize herself. Secondly, some of us like to read fics where the characters are in character, not about oc named Sakura.

Maybe I should make myself clear: Kishimoto makes the only girl with a similar screentime than both of the boys such a character...and he did not even develop her ...heck, I would say even Orochimaru has a bigger development than Sakura.

I mean, you can show how he got off on "showing they were pathetic", yet he is the creator and he did make both women pathetic. I think there is no other male character as pathetic as this both women. And barely anybody calls him out on this blatant demonstration of mysogyny.

At the end, men like to project their own bullshit - objectifying women- on women all day long.

PS. I would rather read about OC Sakura than having a clear demonstration of utter mysogyny in my face. But I don´t read fanfiction.

What I always find weird in fics where Sakura moves on from Sasuke is that the reasoning is mostly "I realized I deserved better, Sasuke isnt worth it" instead of acknowledging that her feelings are not mutual.

Projection. These writers relate to her, so they don't want her to take responsibility. Instead, they make her the victim that "deserves better". It's very silly, Sasuke rejected her many times and never gave her any reason to think he returned her feelings.

[biographydivider]

More Bruno Fanfic!

I have this stupid headcanon that Bruno would LOVE a TikTok book. Like a really tortured, melodramatic mess of a book. So I wrote this dumb, short thing on the train today. Enjoy! And read more of my fanfic here.

Someone was crying. Multiple someones.

           Bruno discovered a puddle of nieces at the foot of the steps, all of them with tears streaking down their faces. Dolores was sniffling, Luisa was openly bawling and Mirabel was dabbing the corners of her eyes with the edge of her dress.

           “Girls?” Bruno asked, tiptoeing around his sobrinas and perching on the bottom step. “Wh-what’s happened? Do I need to kill anybody? Because if I do…I mean, I can’t do that, look at me, I’m a twig. But I could make up some terrible prophecy and…”

           “No, Tio,” Mirabel said, her voice hitching as she steadied herself enough to talk. “It’s just…we just finished the Family Book Club book, and…”

           All three girls held up copies of the same paperback; a red background with a blonde woman in a green dress, looking beguilingly off into the distance.

           “The Eight Paramours of Petra Lansbury,” Bruno read, squinting at the title. “Wait…there’s a family book club? And you didn’t tell me?”

           Luisa nodded. “We wanted a reason to get together once a month and chat. You know, so we don’t, well…”

           “Fall back into old habits." Dolores blotted the last of her tears away with her pinky finger.

           “Again, though,” Bruno said, plucking Mirabel’s book from her hands and flipping it over to read the blurb, “y’didn’t tell me about a book club? Haven’t had anyone to talk about books with for years.”

           All three girls looked at each other. “Well, Tio,” Mirabel started, taking off her glasses to clean the lenses, “at the minute it’s just us three. Because, well, um…”

           “Well,” Luisa continued, “we know you like, um, Shakespeare, and Don Juan, and all this high-brow stuff that, you know…and this isn’t…it isn’t like…”

           “We didn’t want it to make you cry,” Dolores finished. Luisa and Mirabel turned to glare at their prima. “What? It’s true. No point in lying to him. Petra Lansbury is a sad book. We didn’t know if you could handle it.”

           Bruno felt the colour rising in his cheeks. “Is that what you girls think? That I-I’d just be, like, mentally scarred by some dumb book?”

           Luisa gasped. “It’s not dumb Tio it’s beautiful.”

           “Yeah, but I’m not like, y’know, that fragile.”

           Mirabel rose to her feet, looking contrite. “Look, Tio. We’re sorry. How about we let you know what next month’s book is, and –”

           “Nope!” Bruno jumped to his feet and held the paperback in his hand aloft (as if Luisa couldn’t snatch it from his hand without even standing up) “You all think I’m so, so fragile, and so delicate. Everyone’s always like; ‘oh, poor Bruno, poor sad Bruno, he’s too emotional, he can’t handle it.’ Well, y’know what? I’m gonna read the whole thing. Tonight. Then you’ll see.”

           Bruno stomped back up the stairs – making it about three steps before whirling on his sobrinas again, giving what he hoped was a haughty, disapproving glare. “And I’m not even gonna buy my own copy. Just gonna take yours, kid. So…so there.”

...

           “Tio?”

           A lot had happened in the last few months at La Casa Madrigal. But one thing that was would never change was that the only acceptable excuse for missing Morning Briefing was if, somehow, you’d broken all your bones in the night. Hence, at five past nine, Mirabel was sent away from the table to fetch her Tio. She rapped at his door – Bruno's room was a mess of corridors, nooks, and crannies, if he was in there he could be anywhere.

           “Tio Bruno? It’s time for breakfast. Abuela says you need to be downstairs in five…minutes…”

           Bruno was laying widthways in his red, leather chair; hair hanging down almost to the floor, feet dangling. He didn’t start as Mirabel opened the bedroom door wide, stepping inside – didn’t even look up. The fire had long since sputtered out into nothing, and the remains of last night’s coffee sat, barely touched, beside the chair. In his hands, Bruno held Mirabel’s copy of The Eight Paramours of Petra Lansbury.

           “…Tio Bruno…?”

           Bruno lowered the book and stared balefully at Mirabel, still upside down. Mirabel felt a short, sharp pang of worry as she realised his cheeks were flushed, raw, and wet with tears.

           “Are you…”

           “Their love could never be, Mirabel….” Bruno choked out miserably, holding the book out towards Mirabel as if she could take his despair away just by confiscating the book. “She…Petra loved Violet so much. And she never forgot her first love; not even when she married that oil baron; you know the one?”

           “I do, Tio. I’ve read it.”

            “Ay Dios, a-and the scene at the end, with the newspaper? Why didn’t you warn me?!”

           Ah. He was on the last page. That explained everything.

           “I know, I know. I did tell you it was sad,” Mirabel sighed, sitting beside her uncle’s head. Bruno groaned.

           “Now I’ve got a headache.”

           “Did you literally spend all night lying here reading?”

           “Uh-huh. And crying.”

           “Well. That was dumb.”

           “Uh-huh.”

           “Come have breakfast. It’ll help.” Mirabel half-pulled, half-extracted Bruno from his seat. “So,” she huffed, helping him to his feet, “Book Club is a no from you?”

           Bruno rolled up through his spine, flicking his hair out his eyes. “Oh, no,” he scoffed, smearing his ruana sleeve across his face to get rid of the worst of the tears, “never said that. Says in the back of this one there’s another book by the same person?”

           “Lavendar Lee and the Quartet. Yeah.”

           “Have you got that one?”

           “Somewhere.”

           “Will it make me cry?”

           “Probably.”

[themarvel-spnmultifanwriter]

Sweetness in this College Horror - Sam x Reader

Pairing: Sam x Reader (gender neutral)

Summary: you are a college student who hates college and Sam and Dean work a case. You and Sam get closer as the thing they hunt wants to get to you. You and Sam catch feelings for each other and after you find out about the supernatural in this world you decide to become a hunter.

Warnings: mention of blood, violence, person trying to forcefully kiss you, dirty talk, angst, comfort, fluff, strangers to lovers (sort of)

Word count: 5.2k

I tried to make this gender neutral so both boys and girls can read this...

You woke up with a massive headache after another college party. The night seemed blurry. It wasn`t any different to all those other nights out with the people from college that you didn`t even know. Sometimes you wondered why you even hung out with them. At which point did you let your life slip away like this? But then again it was better to not care about anything for a few hours, being completely wasted, than staying in your dorm drowning in depression.

You groan and turned your alarm off. On the bed next to you, your room mate was still asleep. You`ve seen them make out with one of the med students last night and weren`t surprised that Alex suffered from a complete hangover. After you brushed your teeth and feeling to sick and unmotivated to fix your hair you changed into some random clothes and walked to your first class.

´´Here we go`` you said to yourself. Another day studying law to become a lawyer just like your parents wanted you to. It was the complete opposite of what you wanted. Sure you wanted to help people, you always felt the urge to fight for something, fight for right and peace, but you never saw the job of a lawyer as right for you. Because in the end you knew you`d had to defend a criminal, a monster, even if you knew it was wrong and that they deserved to be put into jail. That`s why yo hated college so much, why you didn`t want to be here. Because all those people around you they didn`t care. They just wanted to be right and argue. You couldn`t agree with that.

With your head resting on your desk you almost fell back asleep when a voice approached you from behind.

´´Sick party last night wasn`t it?`` a male voice said from behind you. you replied with a ´´Mhh`` hoping that might end the conversation, but of course the person wouldn`t shut up.

´´You looked sick hot by the way`` even though you weren`t looking you could hear the smirk on the person`s face. ´´You know maybe next time you wanna hang out with me at a party. I could give you good company, better than your room mate. And maybe we could also have some private fun``

you turned around to look at the person. Taylor Johnson, one of the more popular students at college. You didn`t like him. Not only was he no different than all those other rich white kids, he was also spoiled and probably never heard a no from his parents as a kid, which, now, made him think he can have what he wants or who he wants whenever he wants. Seeing him made you sick and it was for sure not because f the rest alcohol in your blood.

´´I doubt that we could have any fun together`` you said and turned away, but he sat down right next to you and moved really close so you could smell cigarettes and cheap vodka coming from his mouth.

´´Well why don`t you come to our party tonight and we find out? It`s at my place, starting at 9`` his smirk was so disgusting you felt the sudden urge to vomit.

´´I`m busy``

´´I`m sure whatever it is that you had planned can wait till tomorrow. Trust me you don`t wanna miss this out`` he moved to your ear and whisperes ´´once I`m in your panties I can make you cum faster than anybody ever did before``

´´Don`t you underestimate yourself?`` you asked and moved slightly away. ´´look I get it. You might think you are so great in bed and I hate to break it to, but those people you slept with, they probably pretended to cum fast to get it over with``

´´You are playing hard to get, but sooner or I`ll get you sleep with me`` Taylor said before he left.

You thought that first class of the day would never end. When you could finally leave you walked to your next class, math. You were surprised that you`d have another math class this semester, after your last teacher had been attacked by a wild animal. Well at least the police says it was a wild animal. You were one of the people who found Mr Browns and you were sure no animal would rip out the heart and leave the rest of the body as it is. But what did you know after all. The police didn`t want to listen so you let it go.

The new math teacher was very tall, his body looked fit and his arm muscles popped out as he fixed his brown hair.

´´Oh he`s so hot!`` ´´Yes, I want to sleep with him`` you heard the girls behind you talk. You rolled your eyes. But you had to admit that this new teacher was handsome. And you knew you would pay more attention in class from now on.

Dean was driving the impala while Sam read through the newspaper.

´´Ha, listen to this. A math teacher died on the campus of a college for law studies in Arizona two days ago. The police says it was an animal attack, probably one of the zoo animals escaped.`` Sam said.

´´And?``

´´And the heart was missing``

´´A werewolf clearly``

´´That`s what I was thinking. And he hasn`t been the only one. Two weeks before that the janitor died the same way`` Sam said. ´´Plus the place is only about two hours from here``

´´Alright so lets check it out`` Dean said and started laughing.

´´What?``

´´Man you must be glad to be around your freaky law student friends again`` Dean laughed.

´´Oh shut up`` Sam said and slapped the paper into Dean`s face. Two days later Dean and Sam applied for jobs at the college.

´´Why do I have to be the janitor? Walking around in this uniform and cleaning up those people`s mess`` Dean complained.

´´Because I`m the one who actually knows something about law Dean``

´´At high schools it didn`t matter either that I didn`t know anything for being a teacher`` Dean shrugged his shoulder.

´´Just stop complaining`` Sam said and walked to your class room. Even though he wouldn`t admit it in front of Dean, he was glad to be here around all those students. It made him happy to watch those kids study. It reminded him of the time where he felt the most normal.

And of course he wasn`t surprised when after the lesson many girls came to him and ask silly question`s just have a conversation with him. This was another reason why he didn`t want Dean to apply as the teacher. He know Dean. He knew he would use the chance to sleep with one of the girls.

Though you were attracted to this new teacher you didn`t run up to him after class. You saw this behaviour as rather childish and didn`t know what was the sense behind it. You saw all those girls as stupid for thinking they could life a hot teacher-student romance.

In your dorm you received a message from Taylor, asking if you wanted to go to the party with him. You didn`t reply. You didn`t mind going to a party, you liked getting drunk for free even if it was cheap alcohol. But you didn`t like Taylor. And you hated the idea of a party at his house.

You woke up pretty early that next morning around five. You pulled out your phone and saw a video of your room mate, Alex, rejecting Taylor in front of everyone. You laughed and were very happy that Taylor made a fool out of himself.

You decided to head to the campus and enjoy the morning sun with some hot coffee and pancakes that you bought at a nearby shop.

As you walked into the camus area you saw something from far away. A neon green jacket. ´´Didn`t Alex wear one like this yesterday?`` you thought to yourself.

´´She probably lost it while she was drunk heading to one guys apartment`` you said to yourself and walked towards that spot of green in the distance. But the closer you came the more you something else besides that jacket. It wasn`t Taylors jacket on the ground it was Taylor in the jacket on the ground. You rushed to them, wanting to help them up when you saw the blood all around her stomach and you couldn`t help yourself but started screaming in shock, letting your coffee and breakfast drop on the floor as you froze.

Dean and Sam had come to the college building early that morning to investigate. They were just about to leave the building when they heard you scream and started running towards you immediately.

´´Hey are you okay?`` Dean said and rushed to you before he saw the body on the ground. ´´Oh god, Sammy``

´´Hearts missing`` Sam said as he checked out the body which you didn`t notice as you were still in shock and had hugged Dean very tied in your panic.

´´Little help here Sammy`` Dean said and pointed at you as you gave him a heart time breathing.

´´Hey you its okay. Everything is alright`` He took your hands. ´´Dean call 911 to get the body away. I`ll talk to her``

And with that Sam took you to the school library to have you calm down. He sat down with you and handed you some tissues.

´´Are you okay`` he asked. He sounded worried, but also calm. You were very confused about his behaviour. How could someone stay so calm after seeing a dead body. And so you looked up to see who this weird person was and who you saw made you gasp.

´´You`` you asked surprised.

´´I`m sorry do I know you?`` Sam asked. It hurt though you weren`t surprised. Of course he wouldn`t recognise you. Still somehow you hoped he would.

´´I- no. We had a class together. I mean I- I am one of your students, y/n, but that... That doesn`t matter.`` you stuttered. ´´What are yo doing here? Nobody is here at this hour``

´´Well you are here too`` Sam smiled. It was a sweet smile, very kind.

´´I just wanted to enjoy the morning, before the storm. Before all the people come in``

´´More of an introvert I see. Me too`` Sam smiled again and handed you some water.

´´That`s not it`` you said. ´´I just don`t like to see all those people here. All those future lawyers. They all don`t care about justice, not really. I mean in the end they wouldn`t have a problem defending a killer or a criminal in general``

Sam was surprised, so were you. You didn`t know why you were saying all this. Why were you opening up to a stranger after you never told anyone anything for years. And Sam was surprised because he had never thought about lawyers that way. He always wanted to bring justice to the world, but never thought that if he became a lawyer he`d have to defend criminals as well.

´´So why are you here then, if you think about this job so negative. I mean after all you are still studying law don`t you?`` Sam asked and looked deep into your eyes. He was completely focused on you. He was curious about you. You were so different from all the people he met before. He wanted to know you.

´´My parents are the ones who want me to do this. They want me to become something big like them. They both are successful people themselves. My mom is a doctor and my dad is a lawyer too. So I had to chose between studying med or law. Besides, my dad knows the principal so it was easy to get me in. There wasn`t much of a choice``

´´Why didn`t you just do what you want. You don`t seem like the type of person to just do whatever someone tells you to`` Sam asked. He could relate to you. In some way he felt connected to you.

´´Really there wasn`t much of a choice. Do what my parents say or go your own way but with no money and zero support from anyone. Now tell me what would you chose Mr?`` Sam was quiet after that. He felt sorry for how your life wasn`t really yours.

´´What would you do? I mean if you could?`` Sam asked after some time.

´´It doesn`t really matter now does it?``

´´Come on what would it be?`` Sam smiled. This sweet smile. Now you just had to tell him. ´´I don`t know. I want to do something were I can fight for what`s right. For justice. I want to live, knowing I am doing something good``

´´Which you sort of can after all as a lawyer don`t you think?`` he tried to cheer you up.

´´Yeah..`` you sighed. ´´I guess complaining about your classes to your teacher isn`t that smart after all is it?``

´´Probably not`` Sam laughed. ´´But don`t worry I sort of get it. Now, are you okay?``

´´I don`t know. I can`t believe this happened to me again``

´´What do you mean?``

´´I don`t know if you heard... But there have been two killings before. I found the body of the last victim`` you said, flashbacks rushing through your mind.

´´You mean the animal attacks?`` Sam asked.

´´That`s what the police says`` you rolled your eyes. You couldn`t believe those cops kept saying it was an animal.

´´So what do you think it was?`` Sam asked you, listening even more careful to what you were saying which you didn`t realise. You thought he was just curious. You would have never thought back then that he was a hunter.

´´It cant be an animal. I mean which animal from around here takes the heart and leaves the rest of the body without a scratch? Besides, no animals are missing in the zoo and this isn`t exactly a wild area where you find bears and other animals every day. It was probably some weird creep from around. Some psycho you know``

´´y/n is there anyone from college who could`ve done this? Take revenge or something on those victims?``

´´What? No? I- I don`t think so... Why would you ask that?``

´´Look I really gotta go now. Ehm take care of yourself and yeah sorry this happened to you, but it will be alright`` and with that the new teacher just left. What a weirdo, you thought.

´´I found nothing`` Dean said a day later in their motel.

´´Me neither`` Sam replied though he wasn`t really listening to his brother. His mind was far somewhere else.

´´And you sure that person, this student, doesn`t know more? I mean maybe they were just in shock and that`s why they couldn`t give us any clues``

´´No they don`t know anything`` Sam said with a quiet voice, almost a whisper. ´´They`d make a good hunter. They got the type of look on their face. And the will to do the right thing``

´´Are you daydreaming about your students now? Sammy forget about them. Your little crush won`t come with us.`` Dean chuckled.

´´They are not my crush Dean`` Sam said offended. But he kept thinking about you that day and the next day in class while he watched you taking notes. You didn`t look at him, not much. Not after he had been acting so weird. And because you didn`t want to develop feelings. You didn`t want to seem weak, though you knew that was nonsense. But Sam kept watching you. Even on the campus as Taylor came to you.

´´Hey there`` Taylor`s breath still smelled awful like everyday as he is drinking every night.

´´Go away`` you said annoyed. Usually you would try to somehow be polite to him as you still had some manners after all, but today you were too tired to be friendly.

´´Whats up with the mood?`` Taylor laughed. ´´Aren`t you happy to see me?``

´´Just leave me alone`` you groaned. A couple of students around you started giggling as they were all too amused about Taylor getting rejected by you.

´´You better watch your tone in front of me`` he grabbed your arm. He was much bigger and stronger than you and his grib hurt. ´´It was all fun and games, you playing hard to get, but you should know your place``

´´I think you are the one who should know his place`` you snapped at him.

´´I told you I will get you sooner or later, don`t forget that`` Taylor`s eyes were filled with lust. It was creepy and it freaked you out.

Sam, who was watching you from afar, wanted to walk over to you and help you, but Dean pulled him aside.

´´Hey man`` Dean said.

´´What?`` Sam asked, worried about you and mad at his brother for not letting him walk over to you.

´´I got something``

´´Now?`` he asked nervous.

´´What do you mean now? Yes of course now. Or lets just wait a week or two and let this son of a bitch kill some more people`` Dean said pissed at his brother. He noticed Sam`s weird behaviour these last few days and he didn`t like it. Sam had his eyes still on you when he saw you pushing Taylor away before walking to the other side of the campus. Relieved he turned to his brother.

´´Alright what is it?``

´´You with me?``

´´Yes Dean just say what it is`` Sam snapped at his brother.

´´Alright. Jeez you gotta chill. So I checked the time when the victims died``

´´And?`` Sam asked.

´´And it always happened between three and four in the morning``

´´So?`` Sam didn`t get what Dean`s point was. ´´You want us to stay awake every night and hope the monster will show around?``

´´Not exactly. All the killings happened on Campus, under the week and after there was a party outside of the campus.``

´´When most people aren`t on campus and the person won`t be seen`` Sam said to himself.

´´Exactly. The janitor and the math teacher usually stayed late so they went home at night. And the student we found, she lives on campus and left the party pretty late`` Dean explained.

´´ I heard some kids talking about a party tonight`` Sam said. ´´Some of the richer kids out of town will have one at his place``

´´Now I say we wait here on campus for someone to show up and wait for our monster to try and get them``

While Dean was preparing for their werewolf hunt, Sam stayed in a cafe on campus. He watched all those students study. He missed college. He missed his normal life. He missed the feeling of feeling like everyone else.

´´Oh y/n hey`` he said and waved at you when he saw you. You smiled and waved back awkwardly before ordering coffee. He was the first teacher to ever greet you like this in a place like this. But you had to admit you liked to see him.

Sam asked you to sit down with him. You agreed because you thought it might seem rude not to, but you felt weird doing so. And maybe you even felt a little excited.

´´How are you?`` Sam asked you.

´´Good`` you lied.

´´You sure?`` Sam asked with a smile.

´´Well I still have to stay here at college`` you sighed.

´´Yeah that sucks`` he said and took a sip of his coffee.

´´Professor why did you call me over?``

´´Oh please say Sam to me``

´´Sam?`` you asked.

´´That`s my name yes.`` Sam smiled. He didn`t know why he was acting that way. He knew he had to act like he was a normal teacher, but then again he wanted to know you better.

´´So, Sam, why did you wanted to talk to me?``

´´What?`` Sam asked surprised. In his head he had been thinking about what to say to you, but didn`t count with such a question coming from you. Which, now, he realised was stupid of him, because it was strange for a teacher to start a random conversation with a student. ´´I just... I wanted to make sure you are okay``

´´Well, thank you I am`` you both smiled at each other. His eyes fascinated. They were so pretty with sunlight reflecting in them.

´´So... College is that bad?`` Sam laughed. ´´I mean you can have a lot of fun anyways. Parties and stuff. Making friends``

´´I don`t want to make friends. Most people here are weird. And I only go to partied for the free drinks. Its nice to not feel anything for some time you know``

´´You shouldnt throw your life away like this`` Sam said all of a sudden and took your hand. He looked into your eyes intense. It gave you shivers. ´´lease try not to throw your life away. I get how much it sucks to be here if you dont want to, but you should at least try and make the best out of it``

´´You don`t understand`` Your voice was quiet. You knew he was right. You never wanted to start drinking. But now you couldn`t stop.

´´Trust me I do`` Sam`s look was sad, yet soft and feelful. His hand still touched yours. It was bigger than yours and warm. You liked the feeling of him holding you, though you wished you wouldn`t. He gave you a feeling of being understood. He was the first erson on your side, the first who listened. And you would`ve kissed him if he hadn`t moved away all of a sudden. Because Sam had noticed the time and that he still had to help Dean prepare for the night.

´´I have to go to my next class`` He said as he stood up. ´´Please think about what I said. Don`t waste your life like this. You deserve much better``

You were thinking about Sam`s words, but in the end didn`t listen and got dressed for the party. You had to get drunk. The last few days you stayed sober and it was like hell. You had to get wasted. You needed to drink away the pain for some hours. Sam wouldn`t understand. Afterall he had the job he wanted. So you met outside with a few other people from campus to get a ride to Maison`s party.

Maison was one of the richest kids so for once you could enjoy the taste of expensive tequila and vodka instead of cheap beer. Most people were dancing in the middle of the living room. You just stood aside watching. You were only here for the drinks, nothing more. You didn`t need the dancing or making out with other people. All you cared about was getting drunk enough to not think of college and your shitty life for some hours.

But of course someone had to interrupt your plan. You felt someone pull your arm. You had been drinking to much to keep your balance and fell right into their arms. Into Taylors arms.

´´Let me go`` you mumbled. But they wouldn`t. Instead they pulled you to the room next day which seemed like some office.

´´You look hot tonight`` Taylor seemed drunk. You`ve never seen them like this. Usually they were just an asshole that you`d tell to fuck off, but now they were forceful on you and you couldn`t tell what they were about to do next. ´´Now I`ll show you what fun we can have``

You were pushed against a wall and felt their lips all over your neck, then your lips. Unfortunately alcohol made you weak and clumsy so there was no chance of pushing them away.

´´I told you you will like this`` their breath was on your skin and their hand slid down under your shirt, rubbing your waist and stomach. Anger suddenly filled your body. You had to go through a lot in your life. You had people treat you the way they wanted and make you do what they wanted. You were used to it. But you never let anyone do this to you. And in your anger you grabbed something from a table next to you, some figure out of glass, and smashed it against Taylor`s head who let go off you immediately. You ran off filled with new energy from the shock that you didn´t mind running, or well fast stumbling, back to the campus.

As you arrived on the campus field you sighed relieved and took a few deep breaths. When you heart race had slowed down you looked around. You could`ve sworn there was something. Some distant sound... Something like a running in the bushes. And a groan. Suddenly there was an attack from behind, someone had pushed you over to the ground and you landed on your chest. You heard something like a scream, something similar to a human sound, yet also like an animal. You couldn`t help yourself but scream.

´´Hey asshole`` you heard a voice from behind and a gunshot. Then you saw someone run off and the janitor with a gun after him.

´´Are you okay?`` you saw Sam reach down to you.

´´What the hell was that?``

´´Its alright don`t worry about it. Dean got this``

´´Dean? The janitor?``

´´Yes. Now let me help you up`` Sam gave you his hand. After you stood up you hugged him immediately. You blamed the alcohol for it and felt ashamed instantly, pulling away. A few minutes later Dean came back out of breath.

´´The son of a bitch escaped`` Dean said and looked at Sam.

´´Y/n did you see his face?`` Sam asked you and you shook your head.

´´What`s going on here? What are you doing here? And why is it that the janitor runs after someone with a gun?``

Dean and Sam looked at each other. ´´We should tell her`` Sam said.

´´Come on Sam``

´´Dean we should`` Sam insisted.

´´Alright fine`` Dean sighed. ´´We are FBI. We work under cover``

´´Dean!``

´´Okay fine`` Dean rolled his eyes. He didn`t trust you. You had his brother focus less on his job and he didn`t like that. ´´We are hunters``

´´Hunters`` you repeated. ´´Like bears and foxes and other animals?``

´´More like in monsters`` Sam said. You laughed, but soon realised he was serious. ´´That thing that attacked you was a werewolf. We need your help to find out who it is``

You didn`t know if you were dreaming or if the alcohol made you see and hear things. But then again you didn`t drink that much. So this all must have been real...

´´How should I be able to help you?``

´´It`s probably someone from college. Someone who stays here long. someone who can easily kill those people`` Dean explained. You thought for a moment. You had no idea who could possibly be a werewolf. But then it you. The way they always acted, seeking for revenge. It had to be Taylor. You and Alex both had rejected them. Your last math teacher had them get punished for smoking in school and the old janitor was the one who offered to give them the punishment. All those people embarrassed Taylor.

´´I think I know who it was`` you said.

Soon later Sam and Dean had come up with a plan. After school Sam would tell Taylor to stay longer and follow him behind the school were Dean would stab them with a knife. All was settled and you watched Sam and Taylor arrive from afar as you waited at the impala, which you thought was a nice car. Then you saw Dean coming with the knife. From another direction you saw the principal.

´´Shit`` you said quiet. If he saw Sam and Dean stab a student they`d be in big trouble. And so you tried to distracted him.

´´Out of my way`` he pushed you aside.

Dean was about to stab Taylor, but they noticed Dean and moved to the side. Instead of stabbing their heart, Dean only scratched their arm.

´´Are you crazy??`` Taylor yelled.

´´Its not affecting you? You are not the werewolf? Sam they are not the werewolf!``

´´Of course I`m not you psycho!``

´´Uhm this is all a big misunderstanding. `` Dean said and Taylor ran off.

´´Why aren`t they the werewolf?``

´´I don`t know Dean`` Sam said.

´´Maybe because you got the wrong person``

You saw Taylor run away and Sam and Dean talking to the principal and wondered what was going on. Then the principal attacked Dean, threw him against a wall and went after Sam.

´´I knew sooner or later hunters would come. I just didn`t think they`d be so stupid like you two`` the guy laughed. ´´After you stopped me from having my dinner last night I might as well just take two hearts now``

His claws ripped Sam`s shirt apart. He started carving on Sam`s chest who let out a sound in pain. Then there was a shot and the principal fell on the ground. Sam saw you standing with a gun and then noticed the trunk at the impala was open.

´´Are you okay?`` you hushed to Sam.

´´Yeah`` he said in pain as you heled him up.

´´Yeah I`m fine too thanks for asking`` Dean said as he stood up as well. ´´That was a pretty good shot``

´´Thanks`` you said. ´´So what are you guys doing now?``

´´We`ll keep moving`` Sam told you.

´´Hunting more monsters``

´´Right. What about you? Will you be alright?`` Sam asked you worried. He didn`t want you to throw away you life like that. He wanted to see you do something you want to do, something you are good at. And most important he wanted to stay with you.

´´I guess. I mean I won`t be doing something as cool as you guys. But still. I`ll be fine`` you smiled at your teacher.

´´Alright lets go Sammy`` Dean started to walk to the Impala.

´´Dean wait`` Sam said to his brother. ´´Lets take them with us``

´´What? Are you insane?``

´´Why not? They are good. You`ve seen it. They did a good shot. We can teach them how to hunt. Let them do something they might actually want to do``

´´You know the job is dangerous. It can get them killed`` Dean tried to explain to his brother.

´´So can staying here and drinking all night. I don`t want them to waste their life. If they go with us I can at least protect them`` Sam begged his brother. Dean didn`t like the idea of you coming with them. But then again you saved their life. You were good with the gun. And you made his brother happy.

´´Fine go ask them`` Dean said and sat inside the impala.

You were surprised when Sam asked you to come along with them. You were unsure at first. But eventually you agreed and it was the best decision in your life. As a hunter you finally felt good doing justice those victims by killing the monsters. You felt free and independent. But most important you felt good that you stayed with Sam.