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livesworthlivingau · 3 months ago

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Lives Worth Living Chapter 29

ISAT/Two Hats spoilers below the break! CW: Mentions of Murder/Suicide, Mental Spiraling

Friendly reminder of the character perspective/voice brackets, as they may be needed for this chapter c:

Isabeau: |"Text"| Odile: ="Text"= Mirabelle: -"Text"- Bonnie: <"Text"> Nille: {"Text"}

(You can't tell when sleep gives way to the lightless void of your dream, but your awareness suddenly snaps to attention as you hear footsteps echoing behind you. You don't turn to look. Your heart begins to race and you shut your eye tight.)

"No... not now... please..." (You beg in a soft whisper. The footsteps stop close behind you. You can feel it just standing there... staring.)

"Not tonight... please just not tonight." (You can't handle this right now, you can't go through more of this blinding nightmare.)

{"But they killed you, Frin..."}

"... Adding Nille to the mix now, huh?..." (You think aloud, hearing her worried voice echoing around you. You keep your eye shut. It won't trick you this time.)

="No wonder they're so on edge."= (You roll your eye behind your eyelid. It's gonna have to try a lot harder than that...)

["If they don't accept me, you'd be okay looping back again, right? You wouldn't want to decide between me or them."] (You freeze for a moment, hearing Vale's desperate voice... You would, wouldn't you?... Without hesitation, if there was no other way... You would...)

<"BUT YOU CRABBING PROMISED!!!"> (You clench your fist, then slowly release it... it won't come to that, you won't let it.)

="Why would we let them near you again after what they did? We can't risk them hurting you again. Or worse."=

"... It's my choice to make." (You state in a stern voice, trying to keep your composure.)

-"Not when it affects us too! If they keep making you loop, how are we supposed to live our lives? How are we supposed to change?"-

"They're not going to! Now shut up and leave me alone!"

|"Sif... Is that fair to us? We agreed to help you, to stay with you... but you're making us deal with their problems too. That's a lot to dump on sometime."|

"... And what if they were me, huh? What then?"

="Oh, Siffrin..."= (You feel its hand placed on your shoulder, causing you to flinch.)

="One of you is the most anyone could take."= (You quickly pull away from it's grasp.)

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" (You shout, having turned to look at it before you realized what you were doing. You see your shadow in front of you once more. The sadness welling up within you. You can't look away as it opens it's mouth to let the other voices through.)

<"They hurt you, Frin! Don't you hate them?! I HATE THEM!!!">

"You don't understand! You don't know what they went through!!"

<"I DON'T CARE! I NEVER WANT TO SEE THEM AGAIN!! They hurt you, stupidfrin!! Shouldn't you hate them too?!">

"WELL WHY DON'T I HAVE A SAY IN THIS?! THEY HURT ME, AND I'M FINE! WHY DOES EVERYONE ELSE HAVE TO CARE FOR ME?!"

-"Y-You say that like it doesn't hurt us too! They killed you! That hurts us to think about, we don't want it to happen to you again!"-

="It's for your own good, Siffrin."=

"IT WON'T! THEY WON'T DO IT AGAIN! AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR ME!!"

{"What if they lashed out at someone else? Someone who wouldn't be fine?..."}

"SHUT UP! THEY WON'T! THEY WOULDN'T!!! THEY ONLY DID IT CAUSE THEY KNEW I'D LOOP! IT'S NOT THE SAME!!"

="Here's a philosophical conundrum for you, Siffrin. If you loop, and everything resets with you, then we can *all* be looped back. We're all valid targets by that logic."=

"... You don't know them like I do..."

|"Sif, if they're anything like you, we'll just get manipulated into liking them..."| (... Something in you snaps. You suddenly tackle into it, pinning your negative shaded self to the ground and wrapping your hands around its throat, trying to strangle the nonexistent life out of it. It's mouth remains open as voices continue to flow out, unimpeded.)

|"You'll both just keep looping until we have the perfect opinion of them and everything goes smoothly..."|

-"If we said no to keeping them around, you'd loop back. How does that give us any choice in the matter?"-

"I DON'T CARE!!!" (You scream, tightening your grip on its throat.)

"I DON'T CARE! I DON'T CARE! I-... I don't... I can't... I-I..." (Your grip slowly loosens, tears flowing down your face and onto its own.)

"I... I can't do this all again... I can't just live my whole life again... not without them..." (You feel its hand lightly placed on your own, still loosely around its throat.)

="Then you'll have to consider if you can live it all over again without us."= (You choke out a sob, pulling your hands away and hugging yourself tightly.)

"It's not fair... it's not fair! Why do I keep having to lose everyone and everything?! When will it stop?!"

["The universe leads, Stardust... We can only follow."]

"I'm so sick of following..." (You whimper out through your heavy sobbing.)

["You'll have to choose some day, Stardust. You'll have to be okay with that."]

(You stop responding, just crying as you hold yourself in that endless void.)

|"Sif... Hey Sif?... Sif!!"|

(You jolt awake as you feel a pair of large hands shake you lightly. You look around frantically only to find Isa holding you. You feel your face is soaked, you must have been crying in your sleep for real. He looks down at you, his face looked worried and... hesitant?)

"Isa? Wh... What's going on?"

"You were crying a lot in your sleep Sif... Are you okay?" (You glance drifts away from them and towards the ground... the look on your face likely answers the question better than words could.)

"Sif... We gotta talk. It's about Vale."

(No... please, no...)

So... surprise! @Tacticaly-Shrubbery helped with this one too, kept this one a secret from the server to really catch everyone off guard~ >:3c. As always thanks so much Shrub, this one hurt! A lot!

#lwlau #lives worth living au #isat au #isat spoilers #isat fanfic #isat #in stars and time fanfic #two hat spoilers #in stars and time spoilers #isat two hats

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piesmell · 8 days ago

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OOOO your ISAT AU sounds super cool what the flip 😭😭 umm so few questions if that's okay!!, how does everyone meet up in this au? I'd imagine Siffrin's the one finding people so is their journey changed in any way? do they still lose their eye n stuff? and and do the swapped roles change anyone's personalities or backstory in any way? SORRY IF THATS ALOT you don't have to do all of em !!

So, before answering the question, wanted to say that I decided to give them new names? So, Odile is now called Elian, Isabeau is Laura, Mirabelle is Catherine, and Bonnie has four names - Ki, Kiki, Kitsune and Kit. I hope it's okay, because I'm not really sure about it (especially about Elian and Laura), but there's also a reason for this. Okay, so, the answer to the question.

HOW THE HELL DID THEY ALL MEET

accompanied by my low-effort drawings

I think their adventure is not much different from Mirabelle's? Well, they lived quietly in the Observatory, but then She attacked and they had to run away.

So, they come across Elian in the forest (after they definitely didn't get lost and definitely didn't wander in a random direction for several hours), and after a short conversation, she decides to help them get to the nearest town... only to discover that the city is Lost (Forgotten? Covered In Darkness? damn, I really need to figure out what name I should use for this) and no one present answers her. And only then does Siffrin tell her about the curse and that it is their duty to stop it. Elian, realizing that they are more likely to slip on the nearest banana peel and die than save anyone, decides to accompany them.

[I have no idea how Elian (Odile) will look in my au, she has a place holder design in the drawing, it will definitely change sometime soon.]

I don't really know how Laura will get into the team, and I don't think it's really important. If I wanted to keep the "he helped when others didn't" thing (and also get him kicked out of the academy), I would get him to help the duo steal something or get somewhere where they shouldn't be. the other way is to get him to help Siffrin and Elian with the route, maybe read a map or something like that, mostly because I imagine him to be a big nerd in culture and geography.

The meeting with Catherine and the meeting with the original Siffrin are quite similar. The trio can't handle a strong Fragment, and suddenly she bursts into battle, shouts out some cool phrase (something like "Meet your end!") and cuts it in half like it's nothing. Of course, when it's over, she gets a lot of praise and admiration, to which she only says that it wasn't that impressive, trying to look cool and mysterious, but also not hiding her nervousness very well. When she is offered to join the team, she hesitates a little, but then agrees, becoming the fourth member of the party.

Catherine found a kid on the beach. After several attempts, she manages to get their attention, and they finally take their eyes off the horizon. After a few questions, it turns out that they don't remember their name, or anything at all except that they have a sister, and that they have to find her. She brings them to the team, and after a short discussion, they decide that they cannot leave the kid alone, and decide to look after them for a while and at the same time maybe help them find their sister, thereby accepting them into their group.

As for other questions, I will try to answer them in the near future, and thank you for your support :]

#isat #in stars and time #isat au #please tell me if there are any mistakes #i can't write

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twilightprince101 · 4 months ago

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IN BUGS AND SNAX

I've recently been seeing more Bugsnax friendos get into In Stars and Time. Like, five different people I met via Bugsnax are now doing fanart and fanfics for it (if you know you know).

And I think it's a shame. Because that number should be SO MUCH HIGHER

So Bugsnax fans who are unaware of this lovely RPG, here's my pitch to you as to why I think you'd like In Stars and Time and would really enjoy it.

For ISAT fans who never heard of Bugsnax, read along if you wanna. This post is primarily for the opposite, but you may find something else to dip your toes into as well 0w0

Extremely cute / lovable cast that holds so much depth and complexity than meets the eye

Look at these goobers. Look at all of them having fun. They all seem like the kind of squishy chibi type OCs you would find on tumblr, right? Wholesome uwu babies?

Hahahaha

WRONG

Well, kind of yes but still WRONG

These characters have so much emotional complexity that it can be genuinely hard sometimes to pick a favorite character between them all. Odile isn't just the "mom of the group," she has her own reasons for being on this grand quest that stem all the way back to her family lineage, her relationship with her parents. And it all gets explored for every last character, just enough where you can fill in the gaps yourself, but you can still feel that there's so much more under the surface.

You know that bit at the end of Beffica's sidequests where she reveals that, despite her bitchiness, her reason for being like that is because she has a MOUNTAIN of trust issues? And that she never tells lies, but wants to unearth truths before she gets hurt? Remember how you felt when realizing that fact? That's there with ALL of the main cast here. Hope you've got your snorkel because there's so much for you to dive into.

2. Gameplay that adds to the narrative and puts you within that world/the player's shoes

This is my personal headcanon and I don't know if it's intentional on Young Horses' part, but I always felt that running around and catching all of the Bugsnax for the grumps in Snaxburg was intentionally designed to make you feel like Lizbert. You replace her role as town "therapist," you solve everyone's problems in a kind of regressive way that ends up hurting a lot of people. Despite the gameplay being fairly simple, it still added a lot to the plot, to give you that sense in the endgame of "oh. oh god, i really fucked up." You are forced into the shoes of that world/character through the gameplay and it hits much harder as a result.

That intentional and thoughtful game design is present from the moment you start up the game, all the way to the end. In Stars and Time has the best "ludonarrative harmony" I have ever seen. Ever.

The way that the game and story is paced makes you fully understand what Siffrin is going through, the constant slog through the castle (without it ever feeling grindy by the way!), zoning out through the same bits of dialogue. At any given point, no matter how dramatically Siffrin acts, you understand emotionally why he is at that point. You feel his exhaustion, his surprise, his desperate hope, his "i'm going to try fucking anything at this point" attitude. The entire way from start to finish, you feel it.

I refuse to say any more because doing so would spoil the game. But trust me when I say, if you noticed what Bugsnax was doing there with player/Lizbert parallels? You'd love this game.

3. "What is Straight?"

So you know how we all collectively agreed that Gramble is trans? and that Wambus/Triffany are the most bisexual straight couple?

How would you like those types of characters.... but have those conversations out loud?

Listen, I love this fandom as much as the next person, and I am a Transble believer at heart. But it's easy to forget that those are all just talked about in fanon, you know? (Despite gramble literally being trans flag colors listen i KNOW). We get certain bits of characters being introspective about their genders and gender roles, like Wambus being really stubborn with his farm and wanting to maintain a sustainable way of living, being "the breadwinner," for him and his wife. And Floofty feeling like an outcast for behaving in a way that is not "socially acceptable" while being nonbinary. But we never talk about those specific subjects directly, about sexuality, gender identity and the like. Not that Bugsnax NEEDS that, it's just something the writers never really thought to include.

But In Stars and Time... it scratched an itch I never knew needed scratched. Take the thirteen different pieces of character complexity and condense it into five. The discussions that the main party have in relation to their identities, both sexual and gender, are some of the most phenomenal pieces of writing I've ever seen. I've talked with asexual people who played this game who were like "finally, FINALLY SOMEONE GETS IT." Finally getting some characters that resonated with them so, so well. And there is a discussion about halfway through the game with a transgender character that absolutely floored me, because so many post-transition character arcs that I see are related to dealing with transphobes and accepting your slay self queen/king/my liege. And that's good. It's cool. But I feel I've seen that so many times now I know the basic plot beats. And ISAT throws in a unique twist to it that I rarely see and the influence that their past combined with cultural pressure it's just, it's SO GOOD. You gotta see it to believe it man, I'm leaving out so much shit here you need to check it out yourself.

4. It will reach into your chest and strangle your heart with its claws

Despite how cute both games can be, they can bash the back of your head with a steel chair of emotion.

You know that feeling you get when you complete a lot of bugsnax sidequests? When you realize Triffany will never get the closure she wanted; when you've helped Wiggle chase this dream of a muse that doesn't exist, and that it was (at least partially) your fault? Well how about if that was the entire game?

This game has some of the highest highs and lowest lows, emotionally speaking. A lot of ISAT also has that same sort of emotional ambiguity Bugsnax has; certain plot points will never be resolved, because that's just life. And you're forced to sit with it, sit in that guilt and resentment because this isn't a problem that can be solved so quickly but you still tried and that arguably made things worse.

Yes, an argument could be made that because Siffrin is not a self insert like The Journalist, then there's a layer of disconnect. But remember what I said in point two: you understand every step Siffrin takes the whole way through because you play it. You sit in it. And no matter how dramatically Siffrin acts, it will be hard to deny that you wouldn't do the same in their place.

5. A big mysterious twist that will emotionally gut you and leave you to dry

Obviously I can't put much here. It'd spoil Bugsnax for ISAT fans and spoil ISAT for Bugsnax fans, more than I already have. But for the fans of each respective games, you KNOW what I'm talking about. And there is an equivalent in the other as well.

If the image of Siffrin making that face intrigues you in any way, especially compared to what I've already shown you. Then go in the game blind. The scene this is from blindsides so many people and once you hit That Face, you know the true game has begun.

----------

That's about the best pitch I can give for Bugsnax fans to play ISAT. I really do feel there's a lot of emotional overlap between these two, even if they're completely different games by nature. There's a lot to love and sink your teeth into.

If this is your first time hearing about either of these games and any of this sounds intriguing to you? Trust me. GO IN BLIND. The gameplay/story blend may not click for everyone right away, but if you let yourself sink into this game, if you let yourself connect with it, boy oh boy does it connect. There is truly nothing like In Stars and Time and/or Bugsnax, and the more people experience this game, the better. Trust the process, slink into it.

I promise you won't regret it.

Thanks for making it to the end have some silly little guys

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chronologically-challenged · 6 months ago

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For my Danny Phantom/isat idea. I adore their dynamic so much yall don't even know: (Act 6 on the top of the House. Danny leans against the wall near the bottom stair. Notably, in the loops, he sat on the bottom step)

Siffrin: Hey, Danny.

Danny: Hey, Frin! Feeling better? Less explodey?

Siffrin: (You take a moment.)

Siffrin: (...)

Siffrin: (Yup! You're tired, really tired, but... you're doing fine. No better than fine. Good. You're doing good for once.)

Siffrin: (You nod.)

Danny: That's good, dude. When we get back, take a nap for like. Ten years.

Siffrin: (laughs) I'll stick with a night's sleep. But. Yeah. I will.

Siffrin: ...I'm sorry.

Danny: I'll stop you right there.

Siffrin: (You stop right there.)

Danny: ....

Danny: (sighs) Look. I don't like what you said. Getting back home... I need to try. And no one else, not even you are going to stop me.

Siffrin: (You nod. The idea of losing him hurts but... if Danny wants to go home, you're going to help. No matter how much it hurts to think about. Besides, it's going to take a lot more than simple craft to get him there. The teen is smarter than he gives himself credit for, but still. It may be impossible on his own. So, even if you lose him, you and the rest of your family are going to be there right beside him until the end. He shouldn't ever have to do this alone).

Danny: ....But, I get it. I really do. I... Let's just say I know what it's like to almost lose my family too.

Siffrin: (What!?)

Siffrin: What!?

Danny: Not the point!!! Just!!!

Danny: ...I forgive you. What happens in the time loop stays in the time loop.

Danny: Unless you want to talk about it.

Danny: You should talk about it.

Danny: But I mean. Whatever happened is fine!!! Like if you did something weird, or if you killed one of us-

Siffrin: (WHAT!!!!)

Siffrin: I WOULD NEVER!!!!!

Danny: !!!

Danny: Never said you did!!!! But I wouldn't mind if you tried???

Siffrin: Danny????

Danny: I don't know it's a time loop!!!! They're weird!!!

Siffrin: (Wait. The way Danny talks about time loops...)

Siffrin: Danny... have.... have you been stuck in a time loop before?

Siffrin: (With how many weird things he's casually mentioned, you wouldn't be surprised.)

Danny: No!!!! I mean I've time traveled-

Siffrin: (-He's What)

Siffrin: (Scratch that. You can be surprised-)

Danny: -But no time loops here!!! We've just got a lot of stories back at home about time loops.

Siffrin: Is... is that a common thing back in your dimension?

Danny: I mean after this movie- wait you don't know movies- we've got this... story we've told called Groundhogs Day. Some asshole dude was so mean to everyone that God put them in a timeloop until he became a better person.

Siffrin: ...

Siffrin: ........Did this actually happen to someone?

Danny: Nah. Back home people compare every time loop story to it. But I'm pretty sure it was fake. Probably.

Danny: (muttering) But I can see Clockwork putting someone in a time loop.

Siffrin: (You feel your headache coming back.)

Siffrin: Okay that's enough.

Danny: (laughs) Suuuuuuure.

Danny: ...But Siffrin, just. I am sorry for saying you were just like Vlad. You aren't. At all.

Siffrin: (You're not sure you agree. You were acting possessive, creepy, imposing, all things you know how Danny described Vlad.)

Siffrin: But-?

Danny: You aren't. Vlad never apologized. Ever. He never even tried to really get to know me. He... You're not like him at all. I've never felt safe with him, and maybe that's why it hurt when you...

(Danny frowns, hands clenched to his sides).

Siffrin: (Danny...)

Danny: (lets out a heavy sigh) But you're not Vlad! Vlad is a dumb fruitloop too up his own ass to care about anyone except his own ego. And you! Just need to go be sleepfrin.

Siffrin: (...?)

Siffrin: (He's looking at you, for something?)

Siffrin: (Oh.)

Siffrin: Was, was that a pun?

Siffrin: (It was an awful attempt at one if it was).

(Danny's face falls. Oh, stars it was. Oops!)

Danny: ...go away now.

Siffrin: Danny.

Danny: No.

Siffrin: I'm dansipointed in you.

Danny: :0! (starts laughing)

Danny: (He starts to move his hand toward Siffrin.)

Siffrin: (It's a fist bump!!! A Danny Fist Bump!!! Finally!!! You get one too!!!)

(You try to meet his hand halfway, but Danny's hand goes around?)

(Oh! He's trying to hug you!!! The sideways ones like he gives Bonnie and Mirabelle!!!)

(You try to save it. You quickly switch around to do an over the shoulder hug that you totally were going for the entire time.)

(You didn't count on Danny doing the same thing, but in reverse. His arm falls as yours rises, and he's left awkwardly raising his fist in the hair while your arm flaps uselessly behind him).

Danny: ...

Siffrin: ...

Danny: We're bad at this.

Siffrin: (You nod.)

Danny: Ummm. (He doesn't put his fist down)

Danny: Oh! How about this?

(He wraps his arm around your shoulder, hug fully completed this time. Yours settles in behind him. But, his fist is still raised, waiting for you to complete the signature Danny Fist Bump)

(How can you refuse?)

(It's a simple. Just a little knock of your knuckles together. One moment of contact before it's quickly gone.)

(It doesn't stop feeling like the world.)

(You realize Danny hasn't let you go.)

Siffrin: Danny...?

Danny: I'm glad. (he rushes out, his voice is tight) I'm glad there was something going on, Frin. That we could do something to help.

Danny: I... I didn't want to lose you too.

Siffrin: (Danny...)

Siffrin: I'm here! I'm right here...

Danny: Good.

(He squeezes you one more time and lets you go.)

(......You don't know his other family. From his stories, you're not sure you want him to go back to a life that put a teenager in charge of protecting the world. But, if Danny wants to go home...)

(You understand more than anyone. That need. It's not fair to tell him it's impossible for him to go back just because it is for you).

(You just hope that there's someone there that misses him as much as he's fighting to get back to them.)

Danny: Now, go take a nap or something, you're gonna fall over the rail. Then what? All those time loops just to die to gravity?

Siffrin: Not the worst way to die!

Siffrin: (You would know!)

Danny: Don't I know it!!!

(You both laugh.)

(You wave goodbye, and head off to another family member.)

Siffrin: (...before the loops you tried to discourage Danny making jokes about dying.)

Siffrin: (You probably should now too).

Siffrin: (But you know what they say about beating dead horses-)

Siffrin: (...........Don't?)

Siffrin: (...)

Siffrin: (Eh. You'll see where the jokes take you. After all, you have time to figure it out).

#isat #danny phantom #isat spoilers #yes danny does steal the frin nickname kid squad unite #luna writes #writing tag #god I love these two so much #also danny saying like 3 sus things every conversation is so funny to me

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islandnorthofvaugarde · 7 months ago

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I have had scattered thoughts about an isat gem au myself!! Mostly about fusions because I love fusion lol

I think the first time Siffrin fuses with a party member, it is an accident in the heat of a battle. Siffrin and someone else (Mira?) rush in at the same time with the same goal of striking a sadness and fuse. They don't realize their fused while they attack and finish off the sadness. Then there is a few seconds of confusion ("Huh why am I- are you so high up? Wait why do you- I look different? Where's Siffr--ira? !!!!!!!!!!") they unfuse quickly.

I wonder if the rest of the party think Siffrin dislikes fusion the way they believe he dislikes touch? I don't have much elaboration on that one honestly.

Sometimes I think and Isabeau and Siffrin's fusion. I like thinking about them as a fusion seeing the stars and getting a rush of feelings from Siffrin that has them lay down to look up at them. Isabeau finds the memory of that feeling he has fused with Siffrin precious. In that moment he could understand Siffrin's feelings about the stars perfectly. It's hard to do it when separated. Like somethings... blocking it from him? Also I like thinking that as a fusion with someone unfamiliar with the Universe beliefs, Siffrin can see the stars better. Some odd combination of not thinking about the stars and knowing things about the stars combines in a way that makes them much clearer.

I also like thinking that when the Isafrin fusion is stable enough, when he is their own person separate from Isabeau and Siffrin, he knows that Isa and Sif love each other even if Isa and Sif don't quite know. They can feel their love in how they are. It's comfortable.

Also! Thinking about how negative traits can boost each other in a fusion is fun! Isabeau and Siffrin's insecurities feeding each other when their mood is really low. Usually they unfuse if it gets that bad. The love they feel for the other creates a conflict to it that makes the fusion unstable. But they don't unfuse immediately <3

Mirabelle and Siffrin's anxiety boosting each other to the point they get Here Comes A Thought style hallucinations of their fears. Also I like the idea of them talking about it unfused! Feelings Buddies! Actually I also like Isabeau trying to talk with Siffrin about the Insecurity Spiral that led to them unfusing as well but Siffrin doesn't want to talk about it. Eventually they have to though.

I can't think of any other thoughts off the top of my head. Also my thoughts were very vague on "what gems are they is this au more isat or su" etc so not all of them may fit with your au. I wanted to share them anyway though!

SHAKES HANDS WITH YOU. YESSSS FELLOW FUSION ENJOYER

yes yes i do agree with sif fusing with mira first (and reading this has given me an idea for a comic for when i finish refs proper. teehee) and specially because neither of them would be aqquainted with fusion (i'd think that isa has proably done it in work before like same gem fusions in the og show. and odile surely has fused with someone at some point in her life considwring she's the oldest. bonnie would be the only one to not considering they're fully human) so both sure would have an experience!!

also about the touch thing. maybe it's not equal but related to it?? like everyone thinks sif doesn't like being touched and assume that he has a similar case with fusing. but he has fused before at that point so maaaybe they think he only thinks of fusion as a "last ditch effort on a fight" thing and don't think they'd like to fuse just to hang out. maybe the rest of the team does fuse sometimes outside of fighting or whenever they need a fusion only skill to do somwthing but never ask siffrin to join,, he has noticed but doesn't say anything really

and to the sif and isa fusion. yessssssssssss. it would probably happen after the loops but a close call would have been in isa's friend quest before everyone elsw arrived. i think them doing it after the loops would be better so siffrin doesn't feel obligated to do it every single friend quest run. personality wise i think the fusion conciousness would be kinda like bismuth mixed with garnet mayhaps..

and the butterflies!! boy do we love the butterflies. considering human/gem hybrids are thecnically fusions as seen in canon i DO think siffrin would see butterflies by himswlf. but it would sure become harder when fused with mira and if both are not feeling well™. AND THE FEELINGS BUDDIES IDEA YESSSS

^^ as a last thing here's a mspaint sketch of the mira and sif fusion (not a definitive design yet waugh). i think they'd be dark orange tourmaline :]

#memory of answer #memory of art #su au

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water-mellie-seeds · 1 month ago

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ALSO ALSO ALSO! Is there an Annoying Indie game way to get any endings? I actually wanna get all of them, but sometimes games be stupid and if I eat a grape I lock myself out of 5 hours of cool new gameplay

Im PRETTY sure that it doesnt have that curse... but oh boy do i know the curse well. NOT that im against it, sometimes its done well and feels earned (isat) but ohhhh most times that formula pisses me off so bad waughhhh

Anyway here u go!!!

With no spoilers:

Promise of reunion ending (aka best outcome) requirements: Ib will give Garry her handkerchief, when this happens you'll know you're on the path to that one. (You need enough bond points with him so basically if you're niceys you're good mostly) and then jump through the painting when prompted. the rest of it is pretty straightforward after that but if you get stuck i can help out with that one when you're on it!

Memories crannies ending requirements: no handkerchief 👎 jump through painting when prompted

The next section is the ib all alone section, theres 4 variations of This ending

🌹Ib all alone ending 🌹

Ib all alone 1 requirements: don't jump through painting when prompted

Ib all alone 2 requirements: convoluted as all hell to explain without spoilers so i Wont try.. but you need garry's lighter for it, which you'll be able to get after an Event Occurs.

Ib all alone 3 requirements: this same aforementioned Event has to occur and then you go to the painting but Dont jump in, step away.

Ib all alone 4 requirements: when you're in the dungeon, choose to sleep on final stage when prompted.

🌹end of the ib all alone section🌹

Forgotten portrait ending requirements: The Event has to Occur, ib has to return to the real world and go to the hanged man portrait in the real gallery.

Together forever ending requirements: Say you're fine when garry asks, agree with garry by saying yes, respond with 'garry...' when prompted, jump into painting when prompted.

Welcome to the world of guertena ending requirements: fail doll room as garry, choose to go in the room as ib when prompted. Call garry's name or stare back, doesn't matter, will elaborate on that in next ending.

A painting's demise (worst!) ending requirements: fail doll room as garry, enter room as ib. Call garry's name or stare back, doesnt matter. This ending will occur instead of welcome to the world of guertena ONLY if you have a poor bond with mary (less than 4). The rest of the ending should be straightforward past this.

If theres any questions lmk? If you want all endings its likely you'll be playing the game more than once, but its a relatively short game so its not as tedious as some others that make you do that! Basically, the way i did it was just do whatever the hell you want for your first run and see what ending you end up with (tell meeee :3)

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eyesteeth · 17 days ago

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(ISAT anon) What specific features/story beats would you have liked to seen in ISAT (beyond or expanding upon what you've already mentioned) that would have made it better?

honestly, off the top of my head, not that much.

i must make a confession here: i have over 55 hours in ISAT but they were all spent in the span of three weeks after i received the game for christmas last year. i have not properly consulted the text in a while, and so i may be forgetting things.

generally, i'm content with the content (hah) we got or what was hinted at. this isn't the kind of game that needs to provide a bunch of lore about its world. while it's fun to consider what the other cultures and such are like, that's for the realm of fanfiction, and sitting the audience down to describe everything in this really cool world you made for your ocs will hinder the plot (though given adrienne's 'that's your turn now' responses to greater lore questions, such lore may just not be there. which is fine, it's not crucial foundational information so we don't need to know it) .

ISAT spoilers below.

my main story beat desire is that the forgotten continent arc had a different conclusion. for example, perhaps after siffrin realizes that the wish method they used was one specific to their culture, which should have been forgotten, it could lead to a conclusion along the lines of 'i will cherish what i have and do what i can to continue these traditions'. maybe siffrin also thinks on other things depending on player choices - the coin, the story about the man wishing for a clone, running away from home, the relevance of stars, etc - and that adds to things they can choose to cherish as part of where they came from. i don't think we should've gotten more in the tradtional sense - the whole Point is that there's not a lot of information - i just wish those particular building blocks had formed a different shape.

i also think there should have been more dialogue options with the king after he kills bonnie. not instantly after - i like the mechanical storytelling of siffrin not wanting to talk to him after what he did - but once they try to say the name and siffrin starts slipping further and further into the same ideology of the king ('i'll keep all my friends here together' vs 'i'll preserve this place as it is forever') i think it'd have significant weight if new dialogue options pop up, showing his desperation. to my memory, the option to talk never goes away (i know i kept giving the king flowers until it wasn't possible anymore), so adding something in there in a later act would be fun for people who keep checking just to do that. and, perhaps it could lead to some realizations from siffrin on remembrance, from where he does and does not agree with the king.

to that point, i think a king hangout would be fun. much like how loop's hangout results in the whole party dying without siffrin, a potential king hangout could involve everyone else being frozen so as to not interrupt a conversation between the two. perhaps it could be triggered by a dialogue option within the ask something tree as described above. then you get a goofy image of siffrin and the king's insane height difference while they have a conversation that gives siffrin much to think about. and then, like how loop's hangout ends with siffrin looping, the king's hangout ends with siffrin being frozen and looping back.

#asks #isat anon

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bird-butch · 7 months ago

Text

isat spoilers

but, hey, maybe i'm also overestimating how much one bad day/conversation with someone will affect you after a long friendship. they obviously don't have the same perspective on all this as sif and the player do. still think the time loop revelation should hit harder, but i guess they don't know all the horrible details yet so that's fine

guess i was wrong about how quickly the party would forgive siffrin. not sure how i feel about that. like i kinda agree with sif that they should probably be a little more affected by everything?? they seem very chill with it all of it; siffrin's awful behavior which, even if you understand why, would still be affecting you emotionally i think. but also siffrin's own suffering which they kind of seem to be.. well not "brushing off" but they are reacting kinda calmly to finding out about the time loop. maybe it's just shock? not knowing what to say and defaulting to just trying to be supportive in whatever way they can? idk, guess i expected something more in the direction of "what you said really hurt me and i don't fully understand why you did it but i know you've been through a lot and i love you so i want to try to forgive you (for hurting us and yourself) even if i'm not quite there yet" <- but obviously not phrased as directly as that because you can't expect these characters to communicate their feelings that clearly

either way, these conversations are very endearing. bonnie's especially made me smile.

#this is a small nitpick btw and i may be totally wrong and change my mind later. the character writing in this game is very good #just feels like a kind of sudden and bit too neat conclusion to everything that's happened in this game #maybe a pacing thing rather than a writing thing? but i'm not done yet so who knows #take this all with a grain of salt #i actually already started changing my mind while writing this. i think... siffrin's expectation that they would be angry and hate him #kind if rubbed off on me too. well of course i knew they wouldn't hate him. but i definitely underestimated them a little #m

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aleatoryalarmalligator · 7 years ago

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Life story Part 26

By the end of the year, my geology/math teacher, Mrs. Kerrick, in all earnest trying to get me to come to class since she knew full and well like everyone did, minus my dear old dad that I was skipping half my classes tried calling our home phone one day when I didn't show up. On this particular day, I had decided upon waking that today was simply too much, and I decided to stay home and surf the web. There was a call, and I could hear this insistence between the rings that let me know that someone was calling on behalf of me, about an hour after class. She left a message saying “Renee, I know you are there. I know you are not sick. You need to come to school. Renee...” I was sitting at the computer just looking at the answering machine saying my name in my teachers voice quite awkwardly. It made me pretty nervous. What if she came to the house?

I understand completely why she called. It was perhaps a little intrusive, but more than understandable, given that I had literally been absent half the time for almost a year. I think more than anything. what she was trying to do was be a good teacher who held me accountable. So I don't blame her for this. And I don't blame myself for skipping like I did either. This was the way things had to be. There was never any other way for them to go. It was an opportunity that was there and open for me with little or no oversight from a single adult, and furthermore, with everything in my life put into consideration, I was not emotionally equipped to go to school in a way that I couldn't really articulate to an adult without being shamed. If I had tried to explain my aversion to being there seven and a half hours a day, I would have been told that my feelings were wrong. Being a teenager puts you in an unfair double bias. If you are overpunished, it's either because you are one of the 'bad ones', or you need to be given a stricter sentence because that is the only way you will get to be a 'functioning adult'. And if you have anything to say about it, you are automatically angsty and hormonal and nothing you say has any merrit because you are still a child. There would be no winning had I tried to reach out to anyone.

Plus, I just have this side of me that gets a thrill from doing little things I am not supposed to. This is not a teenager thing. This is a 'me' thing. I have found ways to muffle about 90% of that side of me since I have to pay bills and make ends meet and try to get enough money to be open to new opportunities and such. But oh, if I had no worries. I love bending the rules.

Anyway, knowing that this might be the beginning in a grander attempt of Mrs. Kerrick's to get me to school on time everyday and might eventually lead to other teachers getting involved to rally against my tardy self, I knew I had to smother this fire out quick. So, I called my dad immediately, and told him I had been puking, and of course, for all his skepticism about me and how awful I was, he always believed me so wholeheartedly when I said I was sick, no matter how obvious and preposterous my condition was. It almost hurt too much lying that hard. And as a parent, it almost made him kind of terrible, because if I really had been sick as often as I claimed, he should have taken me to the doctors. Absolutely nobody is sick as often as I said I was and lives to see eighteen. I also let him know that my 'scary teacher' Mrs. Kerrick was harassing me on the phone and it was making me feel worried (I felt bad about this, but a girl's gotta do ya know?). And like a good father, he called the school and talked to the principal, who told Mrs. Kerrick she had to stop pestering me – much to the dismay of all the teachers who knew what I was doing, I am sure. So I won that one. My dad felt proud that he defended his poor sick daughter. I was in the wrong of course and I knew this, but I still won and sometimes that is what matters. I remember going to school that Monday and seeing a look on her face – not that she was angry at me, but just a sort of knowing resignation.

The principal took me into his office the end of that year, for a serious talk. He said I was one of the top ten students with the worst grades in the whole school and he let me know about it. His mustache twitched as he scolded me aggressively. He didn't like my attitude either, and he had seen it time and time again, so I was told. Kids like me grew up to be either deadbeats or died young – he'd seen it all. What he told me that he couldn't figure out, was why was it that I scored like a 12th grader on my ISAT tests, but had 28% on my school math? It irked him and he seemed sure I was on drugs, which he grilled me on. I couldn't of course explain to him that I was at a loss as to why I got such test scores either. My uncanny skill at multiple choice online tests reminds me of what I had read of chicken sexers who grab baby chicks quickly on a conveyor belt, and just seem to know what they gender of the chicklet is without consciously knowing what they are seeing. I hate using that example since I hate the meat industry, but that really is comparable to my test taking abilities in the format they presented me with. I just had that particular game figured out. He thought I was a deliberate fuck up of the worst kind. He then told me that if he could legally kick me out of the school he would have. Real students were dishonored to have to see a face like mine in the hallway with them, when they work so hard for their good grades. He felt that I was a waste of everyone's time and I was better off if I wasn't there anymore making him and my peers look bad before the state. I should feel sick with shame he thought. I calmly took it, and then asked if I was being held back. He said I was not because the school could not afford it. That's all I needed to hear and I was good.

I hated this girl named Amanda in my class. Partially because she had always hit on Kyle, but for other reasons that I no longer remember or agree with, like she had sex a lot or something dumb that an 8th grade girl would judge another 8th grade girl over. She was sort of phony I guess. I don't know really though. She might have been rude to me at some point in time. Anyway, she asked me to sign her yearbook. I didn't get a year book ever because my dad didn't think it was money worth spending, and he also didn't approve of me being invested in social activities in school. In my dad's mine, I would get good grades if I didn't have friends. He was deeply troubled by my friendships. He didn't fight me on this, or prevent me from seeing my friends, but in his mind the problem with people is that they cared too much for one another. I assume this notion was in due to his own repeated failings in friendship, family and romance which the later often caused him to waste large amounts of his money, perhaps mixed with a true confusion on the mystery of why teenage girls are the way they are, mixed with conservative talk radio and the whole Randian concept of 'self reliance'.

Amanda asked me to write something in her yearbook. I took this as an opportunity to let her know what I thought. I wrote in her year book that I hated her and that I hoped that she choked to death on dick. She was in shock, but she was laughing and everyone was. I don't even know if I meant it or not. I was nice to her about what I had written. I just gave it back to her and smiled. I ended up writing strange things in everyone's yearbook kind of like that because they all wanted to know what I would say.

I decided from this to make my own yearbook to satire the real one. I drew quick pictures of everyone in the class. I drew a mishmash of arms and legs, that was supposed to represent the poorly made collages of girls basketball and boy's football that took up pointless pages to convey somehow. And then I had people sign my yearbook in the end. I guess I probably lost that homemade yearbook though. a t some point. I might have given it to Sarah, who lost it – or maybe she does still have it locked away somewhere. In any case, that is the only year book that I ever owned and I was pretty proud of it.

In the keeping of the spirit of feeling free, I was watching a lot of television, which I was told growing up would ruin me and rot my brain. I could do nothing right by anyone's standards I guess. As someone in their twenties now, I can do many of the things that I did as a teenager, no problem. But back then I was chastised by people who were way worse than me. My real crime was being young. To be fair, I am really grateful that I didn't watch television growing up. I think it made me a better person ultimately. And I do imagine that a lot of television isn't good for you. But because I had been so sheltered from technology all my life – chopping wood for fires, having only a radio that I had to use tin foil to get channels, we didn't even get a DVD player till 2006, I actually got a lot out of watching music videos and other shows, even through all the phoniness and empty shallow stuff. I had never been really exposed to all that style and body language that I would see on the screen. It elevated my existence and spoke to that part of me that is always looking for an existence that is condensed and heightened. And given my circumstances, I will argue that having television for that time in my life was more good than bad. I watched all the music videos religiously, and I studied the musicians and message conveyed in each music video. This was a formal education in aesthetics. And at the time, I was starting to really get into pop punk (eh, I know). But even that lame attachment I had to that music that I no longer listen to, grew and changed into means of expression that are worthy of having. Pop punk for me at the time, made me feel like individuality and self expression was really a good thing. It gave me an alternative to the preppy princess look, and all the normal pop music. And at that point in my life, I could relate to the lyrics much better. I could get into elements of a pop song when I was young – but I could never relate to a Christina Aguilera song. I didn't party or date or anything like that. But I could relate to a whiny Simple Plan song about being uncool, unaccepted, and feeling on edge.

My new favoritest of favorite albums – probably my true first favorite album in my collection up to that point since I didn't like my Avril Lavigne album, was the debut All American Rejects album – something I would never in a million years find appealing now – can't stand the vocals mostly, but at the time, the opening song My Paper Heart, accompanied by the Swing Swing song was really something I could not get enough of. As soon as the album was over, I would put it on again. And again. I would listen to it before school and get this strong boost of weird music induced confidence. Which made me feel a whole lot better. Music really saved my life at this time (even though it was terrible music most of it).

I didn't watch that many movies, but I do remember that I really idolized Jennifer Connelly in a movie called Career Opportunities – I believe it was called. I don't even remember much about the movie, only that I thought her character was just stunning – as she is always quite pretty in all her movies. The most notable scene in that movie was where she was riding the quarter taking pony for kids in a very seductive manner, and it might actually be the only real worthwhile part of that movie looking back. I wanted to be just like her. Of course, I never was, and never have been, and never shall be. Some dreams are not meant to come true. Another noteworthy movie - I also watched Girl, Interrupted and really had a lot of feelings for that movie as well.

And I remember one April day, I believe it was Kurt Cobain's death day April 5th, and I was watching one of the music channels, and they were playing Unplugged in New York. I had never really liked Nirvana at that point. My older sister Roxanne used to listen to Nevermind pretty often, but I had always thought he sounded very unhappy, and it kind of bummed me out when I was eight. I didn't understand why anyone would want to yell like that. I was much more interested in The Barbie Girl song in those times. But watching Kurt Cobain sing some of those songs in that memorable live setting, it was the first time I really was seeing something that seemed completely real to me on TV. He seemed more human than other people. I thoroughly enjoyed it and was even brought to tears. Not to mention. I was also astounded at just how gorgeous Kurt Cobain was. After watching that performance, I had this sense of calm in me, like that feeling one gets when they have a meaningful conversation with a close friend after a long separation.

My dad and Jodi finally broke it off. It was a series of events that eventually devolved into a fight and then a lame attempt to fix it. I guess, Jodi decided to move back to her old place, which wasn't getting bought by anyone I guess after all. Jessie hadn't liked the school in Kendrick, and my father and Jodi were fighting all the time. In a sweep of paranoia, my father ended up recording Jodi's phone conversations over the course of a few months. At first, the conversations were positive to people she knew, and then he started hearing her talk to drug dealers and other men. I was staying the night at her house, when my father silently woke me up and said we were leaving. He was shaky and upset. He took a bunch of gifts that he had bought for her, and said they were mine. He told me that Jodi was cheating on him and on meth. Then the next day, he angrily took the things that I didn't even want from me like I had stolen them from Jodi and gave them back to her. The whole thing was a mess. I guess she was getting high on hard drugs. The wedding was off. My dad kept going to her house for a few months off and on due to relationship inertia I suppose, but eventually their two year hell ride was at a close. This made him really crazy, and I took the punishment for his frustration, fears, self loathing and mistrust. But I will tell all about that later.

Symbolically, and because I no longer had any attachment to school, I just skipped the last day of eighth grade. It would have been a piece of cake to just show up, but I didn't. I sat home and played on the computer. My friends came together and found me after school I my house. Ava always came into people's houses by screaming or acting psychotically. It was alarming. She often was clumsy and would knock something over. Which was either entertaining and endearing or really uncalled for and crazy. It was this mixture that made her what she was and made her fun to be around.

Anyway, I did not expect them to come find me so early, but I guess the last day of school ended earlier than I had originally thought. So when Ava crashed through the door unexpectedly, I flew backwards and due to the force of my shock induced backwards momentum, I actually did three somersaults in a row before my body finally stopped. I remember feeling like I was being tossed by a machine. I just flew. I had no control over this entire situation, but it ended up doing me an unexpectedly great favor. My neck had been paining me for a few years. I had troubles bending it at all some days. I could look to my right at all more often than not. When I flew backwards and did those somersaults, it corrected my neck issue and some of my back pain somehow. It could so easily have done more damage, but it didn't. It was wonderful fortune for me. I remember getting up off the ground and my neck didn't hurt anymore. It could have been a religious moment. It was amazing. I was beginning to feel good again.

Sadly, things weren't working out with Pepsi and she was taken away from me. She bit through ropes to go free so often that it was hard for me to really know what to do with her. She still wasn't really potty trained. I had tried to put a leash on her, but since trying to take her for a walk never seemed to work and she always escaped, I had to pretty much control her by constraining her in a way that wasn't fair to her autonomy, and I since I was really bad at this dog thing, I thought I had to punish her every time she pulled the leash. Needless to say – this was horrible for me to do. I wasn't as patient as I should have been. Which made her hate and fear me. I was doing a terrible job.

One day, I was trying to put the leash on her, and she fought back very rough. It was borderline going to end in her attacking me. She didn't bite me, but she growled in a serious fashion, and got away. Had I tried anything else, she was going to nail me. She was done with my bullshit and in a lot of ways I feel like I had tried to control her with force, and I had not taken into account that she was a faultless dog who had no real reason to respect the rules of human beings. Like the people who tried to put restrictions on my thoughts at school and at home, I had unknowingly been trying to do the same thing to poor Pepsi. I felt this shock of realization go through me when she got out of my grasp in the living room, and she gave me this look. It was like mother nature was slapping me in the face. This look said so much. It was probably one of the most intense stare downs I have ever received. In that stare, I could see the misery she had been feeling, the resentment. She didn't trust me and none of this was fair. If I attempted to do something she didn't like, I felt like she was letting me know she would bite me. She was done with me. For the next month, I would try to pet her to get her to be my little puppy again – to try to start again, and she would walk away. She only came to me if I fed her. She hated my guts. I didn't know what to do. And then whenever I wasn't home, I had to tie her up outside so she didn't chew up the house. This made her stir crazy, and after we put her on a metal chain, she behaved very aggressively. She was mad at having to be my dog. She would bark at everyone who passed.

One day, Katie was walking with another girl in her class whom she spoke to occasionally, and they decided to go in the yard. Pepsi was familiar with Katie, so she didn't growl or bark at her, but she didn't know the other girl, Mia, and so she tried to bite Mia, and ended up ripping Mia's pants as Mia tried to get away. Katie did what she thought was right, and she called the police. It was a bit strange to me that none of this was ever talked about with me to have one of my best friends call the police on my dog without talking to me, but perhaps on this Katie knew best.

So after that, my dad decided we had to get rid of Pepsi. I was heartbroken. It made no sense to me that he would buy me something I was supposed to love and cherish and then take it away from me. It was the painful end to a disappointing year for me. I understood that the reasons were valid, and I also understood that I had failed miserably as a pet owner. But it still broke my heart. She was in many ways my baby. And I cried for several weeks straight. My father felt badly. All those nights that year that I had been depressed. I remember I would look down at her calm sleeping dog face, and it was always a comfort to me, perhaps one of the only ones I had. I know I shouldn't have ever put her value in terms of how she made me feel, but it was hard. Despite all the problems, I really did love that dog.

My dad got this guy at work to agree to take her to a ranch he owned, where she would be free to run and be with other dogs. I tried to be happy for her, as I watched three men try to wrestle her down and put her in the back of the pick up. She was confused, angry and scared. She barked and lashed out in vain. They drove off and I never saw her again. For awhile my dad didn't tell me the truth about what happened. She had gotten loose in the back of the truck, and she jumped out on the way to Lewiston. They could not catch her. The only reason my dad told me was that by sheer luck, she had been found – starving but alive several months later towards the end of town. But my dad just assumed she was dead. She was taken in to the same place where we had gotten her from. One day, about a year later after that, my father had been driving down the road when he saw Pepsi being walked by a lady he knew from high school. He pulled over, and called her name, which she looked at him. They had renamed her something that sounded like Pepsi, like Mupsy or something.

I guess she had psychological dog issues, and had to be treated for dog mental illness. She probably picked it up from me. I felt really guilty. But she was in good shape now. She could be walked, and I had never been able to make that happen. I was going to go see her, but by the time my dad finally got around to bringing me to her house – since the lady agreed I could see her – she had been given away to another home. And then, two years later, Katie sees Sarah and I at a table eating and comes up to tell us that she had spotted her. She was owned by a retired truck driver who lived in the woods. And she seemed really happy. At least, Katie seemed to know it was her. I hope that Pepsi had a good life wherever she ended up. If she is still alive today, she would be 17 years old. Which it's possible she would still be alive, but I am guessing probably not.

I only got picked up on the weekend from my mother one time for an eighth month period. Roxanne's money was mostly gone by this point. All the people who had helped her spend that money were gone. She had a desperate look on her face – a need to ride what she had to it's end. She could no longer afford to buy my grandpa Roy's house, so my uncle kicked her out. Everyone moved out and came back to Lewiston. I don't know how that whole thing ended. I had stayed away. On the one weekend where Roxanne and my mother did come to pick us up. Roxanne and my mother were distant in the front seat talking among one another so I could not hear. I found out years later they were planning on getting completely high on meth that weekend – and why they picked us up at all I cannot say. They put us in a cheap hotel that weekend and left. I thought they would be back, but they never showed up. I ended up watching the History Channel for days straight. My mom had left crackers and little debbies and things like that. I stayed up all night, convinced of everything the history channel wants you to be convinced of – that human beings were an alien experiment, absolutely everything that happened in the bible was actually because of a UFO, Jesus was an Alien and so on. I watched hours of History's Mysteries. I was totally freaked. Eventually my dad came and picked us up.

My mom had dumped James by this time. I asked her years later how she did that. They had been together for 5 years and then it had come to an end. She told me that it was at my grandpa's house. He was taking a bath in the Jacuzzi when my mom walked in. Fully clothed, she got into the Jacuzzi with him which alarmed him. She then told him that she wanted to break up with him – that he hadn't gotten a job for the entire time they had been together, didn't practice the music they had planned, and was just free loading and was more like a child than a man and she was sick of him. And that was the end of James.

I've seen him a few times since. Once, about three years ago I was in a supermarket in north Idaho, and I saw him in the aisles. He has not changed a bit. We had never talked before then, so I wasn't about to start then and I switched aisles so as not to be detected. He didn't recognize me anyway though. I look quite a bit different now. And for a while there, I heard he was playing in a band in Spokane with this twelve year old child prodigy and his father. It was mostly like Rush and Dio type music – but then the story goes, he got kicked out of that band for being drunk all the time. They even used some of my mother's lyrics. Sometimes for years, when I heard a motorcycle roll through town, I might look over and see a very very small man with long hair riding on the motorcycle off in the distance. And I know it's James.

It's hard to imagine 90,000 dollars disappearing in less than a year, but that's what happened. So much drugs. My mother ended up overdosing, so I am told. Which scared her, and she cut down the serious partying and became more of a casual barfly. She never did meth again. Roxanne was hooked though. With the last bit of her money, her and Jody rented a trailer in Clarkston and bought a very dumpy looking truck. It was smelly and falling apart. The set up was beyond depressing. If Roxanne didn't have pills or meth she would scream and cry. She never left the house. Her sons were monsters and they would attack you for fun. She got diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The entire apartment was covered in garbage. Her and her kids all lived in this, but she mostly hid in the back room with her drugs. Jody was gone all the time. She kind of chased him away every time he did come into the trailer. He might have been the most responsible for spending her money. It had all come out that he had cheated on Roxanne and had three babies with three other women in the time that he had also had three children with Roxanne. He was just dumb and they could barely tolerate one another.

As for me, I was growing a lot as a person. I was glad that I had gotten over Kyle. And I felt like my brain was rewiring and the world seemed exciting, fresh and new and I believed I was headed for greatness, regardless and against what anyone told me. A lot of my time was actually spent fighting off everyone who wanted to bring me down. I had hit this bottom where it no longer felt that good to feel sorry for myself or be a helpless bystander in my life. As soon as I got over Kyle, I started shedding weight, and my acne permanently cleared up – for the most part. Of course, like many people if you look closely at my skin, you can see marks of acne. After that summer I was going to be going into 9th.

If for any reason you should like to see what i have written thus far..

PART 25 - http://tinyurl.com/y6v6pgoj

PART 24 - http://tinyurl.com/ycak5d8r

PART 23 - http://tinyurl.com/yac6sk3g

PART 22 - http://tinyurl.com/yat6cfnw

PART 21 - http://tinyurl.com/y783egno

PART 20 - http://tinyurl.com/y8jskymt

PART 19 - http://tinyurl.com/rfhbms8

PART 18 - http://tinyurl.com/ycrznrwk

PART 17 - http://tinyurl.com/y77unlng

PART 16 - http://tinyurl.com/yadpsv8c

PART 15 - http://tinyurl.com/yb3lt6k5

PART 14 - http://tinyurl.com/yb4cfedq

PART 13 - http://tinyurl.com/yalanq9s

PART 12 - http://tinyurl.com/yc79mw94

PART 11 - http://tinyurl.com/yc9qhj84

PART 10 - http://tinyurl.com/yb734w24

PART 9 - http://tinyurl.com/yc2t6vfw

PART 8 - http://tinyurl.com/ybl37utq

PART 7 - http://tinyurl.com/ybvo283g

PART 6 - http://tinyurl.com/kbc9dwu

PART 5 - http://tinyurl.com/msnz4am

PART 4 - http://tinyurl.com/k9x8esg

PART 3 - http://tinyurl.com/mwp9atx

PART 2 - http://tinyurl.com/lbt6xq2

PART 1 - http://tinyurl.com/l8xbvg8

#text

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livesworthlivingau · 6 months ago

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Lives Worth Living Chapter 14

ISAT Spoilers below the break!

"It seems I must have finally taught you how to properly steep tea over those decades." (Odile comments with a smirk, watching you carefully pour from the kettle into each of your teacups.)

"It only took me 5 of those years to make a decent cup~."

"... The fact I can't tell if that's a joke or not is more concerning than anything else..." (You let out a heavy chuckle at her somewhat worried look. You stick your tongue out a give an exaggerated wink.)

"And it still doesn't count as a wink if you only have one eye Siffrin..."

"You've been telling me that for 30 years Odile, it never sticks~." (She just rolls her eyes as she adds a bit of honey and milk to her tea.)

"Speaking of… How are you doing Siffrin, truly?"

"… I think you already know the answer to that question, Madame" (You tease with the lightest chuckle, though it's bittersweet.)

"I suppose I do, though it would still be nice to hear you say it properly." (You pause for a second, before letting out a sigh.)

"… I don't really know anymore… I guess I'm better than I was the first time around at this point, the first few weeks were really rough for me… It's nice to make some better memories to replace it… But those bad times were still important too…" (You start to explain, your hand wrapping around your covered forearm, as if for emphasis.)

"Those moments helped get you to where you are now… It may have been a painful journey but it was just as important as the destination." (Odile finishes the thought for you, her arms crossed as she gets lost in her own thoughts.)

"… Yeah… I know you don't want me to apologize again for what I said on that last day… So I'll just say thanks Odile, for trusting me with your oh so sacred backstory~." (You laugh. Your eye starts to blur from the tears welling up in it before you wipe them away. Odile just smirks a bit at your comment before rolling her eyes.)

"Yes yes, that and my fake research. I'm simply too generous for my own good." (She remarks sarcastically.)

"Now let's discuss something else, I'm tired of all these emotions."

"Heh, I couldn't agree more."

----------------------------------------------------------

"Hey, Odile?" (You ask over your shoulder, fiddling with some thingamajig you found on the shelf. The both of you going on one of your famous 'secret missions' at a little random shop in the town you were passing through.)

"Yes, Siffrin?" (She responded over her shoulder as well, glancing through the various books they had for sale.)

"... There's... I can't stop thinking about something... from, uhh... before." (You begin, trying to dance around the topic without explicitly stating it. She pauses, perking up and waiting, as if telling you to continue.)

"... We all kinda went separate ways eventually, we were still a family of course but... we all had someone else at least... everyone but you Odile..."

"... What is it you're trying to say?"

"I-I'm saying... I don't know if you were happy... It felt like all that you cared about was work, when none of us were left around... You never got a partner, you never talked about friends you made, you..."

"Why are you bringing this up now, Siffrin?"

"... Probably because I never got the chance to before, and I didn't want to let that happen again..."

"I'm not sure how much use there is in talking about something that happens decades from now. What are you proposing anyways?"

"I... I don't know, just... I want you to be happy, I don't want you to be alone..."

"So, what do you intend then? Should I move in with you and Isabeau and stay on the couch forever?" (She asks with a smirk. Your lip curls a bit in response, but quickly falls again.)

"I mean it, Odile..." (She pauses at that, sighing out as she realizes how serious you were.)

"... Very well, Siffrin, I promise I'll keep this in mind... We've got a long road ahead of us until that but maybe things will be different this time around. That's what you're hoping for, yes?"

"In some ways I guess... I mean, these loops have to be for something, right?..."

"Maybe we should be focusing on that right now instead."

"Yeah... I guess you're right." (She suddenly walks over and lifts your hat off, ruffling your hair heavily.)

"You might have some years on me now, but you still overthink just the same." (The both of you laugh the seriousness of the conversation off, finishing up your little trip.)

#lives worth living au #lwlau #isat au #isat fanfic #isat spoilers #isat #in stars and time fanfic #two hat spoilers #in stars and time spoilers #isat two hats

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gwapakasexyko-blog · 7 years ago

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The Nerdy’s Lovelife

PART SIX

Gymn 4pm

Eto na second time kong nagpunta ng gymn dahil sa request ng Ice Prince. Naka-bag pack pa rin ako pero ngayoy simpleng jeggings at maluwang na t-shirt lang ang suot ko. My footwear is an old nike, na binili ni nanay sa ukay ukay.

Bukas ang gymn. Apat ang entrance niyon. Sa likod ako dumaan coz I saw a lot of chika babes sa front. Nahihiya akong ma expose dun. Madaming nanunuod ng practice game. Naghanap ako ng lugar na mauupuan. Medyo crowded na ng konti. I see, taga ibang school pala ang kalaban ng team namin.

I cant see any vacant seats kaya nanatili nalang akong nakatayo doon. Katabi ko ang ibang mga estudyanti walang mauupuan. Taas leeg kong hinanap si Ethan mula sa mga naglalaro but hes not there.

Aisssh. Kaya ayokong manuod ng basketball eh.

Napatingin ako sa score board and nakita kong nasa losing stage ang tigers. Akala ko ba magaling sila. Eh, ano tong nakikita ko?

Kulilat pala sila. So poor. Komento ko sa isip.

Then suddenly I feel my phone's vibration. Hindi tumigil ang pag vibrate niyon kaya pilit kong kinalkal iyon mula sa bulsa ko. May tumatawag ata.

"Hel- -"

Hindi ko pa naman natatapos ang pagbati ay isang bulyaw na agad ang narinig ko. Aray!

"Hindi kita marinig!! Sino 'to?" Dahil sa lakas ng hiyawan ay hindi ko na halos marinig ang tumatawag.

"Im sorry, I cant really hear you. Nasa gymn ako eh. Tumawag ka na lang ul- -

Ayun pinutol ng kausap ko ang tawag. Napakunot noo ako ng mapansing ilang mensahe na ang na recieve ng phone ko.

Where are you?! Dammit!

Paulit ulit lang naman ang message nito. At ng tingnan ko ang conversation ay walang iba kundi ang number na ginamit ni Ethan kanina.

Nag type ako ng reply message ng biglang - "Ouch! Hinay hinay naman kayo guys!"

Muntik na akong matumba ng maghiyawan ang mga katabi kong babae. Theyre all gone wild. Nahihiyawan at nagsipagtalon ang mga ito.

"May artisya ba?!" Sarkastiko kong tanong sa mga ito.

"Higit pa sa artista. Si Ethan ,ayon maglalaro naaaahhhhh!" Sagot naman ng isa sa mga katabi ko na ngayon ay patuloy sa pagtitili.

I love you, Ethan. Sigaw ng madlang people.

Ang hyper lang ng mga ito. Ganun ata katindi ang epekto ni Ice Prince eh. Ano bang silbi ng pagpunta punta ko dito, wala naman pala akong mapapala. Nang magsimula ang laro ni Ethan, nagsipagtayuam ang mga babaeng kanina ay nakaupo sa bench.

Ok. May upuan na ako. Haha.

Inabanduna nila ang upuan para masilayan ang kagalingan ni Ethan sa paglalaro. I just sit there. I feel bored. Ano kaya ang kailangan nito at pinapunta ako dito sa gymn. Para lang ba magpasikat?

Sino naman ako para pasikatan nito. Haha.

Naghanap ako best spot para mapanuod ko naman ng konti ang laro nito. Oo na kasi eh, gusto ko rin siyang mapanuod kahit sa malayo lang fights na. Ayoko ng makipagsiksikan sa mga nagwa-wild na madlang people. Baka maipit pa ako sa mga ito.

Napansin kong halos bakanti doon sa seating area ng kalaban. Kaya lang nasa kabilang ibayo ito ng gymn. Oh well, i need to go there para makapanood ng maayos. Ayun! Sa isang iglap ng on the way na ako sa kabilang grupo.

Nang makaupo na ako saka ako nakahinga ng maluwang. Mas maluwang din kasi ang space dito. Ang lahat ng supporters ng tigers ay halos masa kabilang dako ng gymn.

"Go! Number 3!" Cheer ko sa kabilang grupo.

First time ko kaya mag cheer. Haha. I-cheer ko na lahat pati ang kalaban di ba? Napatingin sa gawi ko ang kalaban ng tigers. Aiiii, lahat nakangiti sa kin. Yung number 3 kasi ay kabilang sa grupo nila na kasalukuyang may hawak ng bola. Nag peace sign na lang ako.

Isang two points shot ang binitawan ng lalaking naka number 3. Wow galing!

"Ang galing!" Napatayo ako sa pagkamangha. Dumako ang bola sa gawi namin.

Ethan pick up the ball and stare at me evilly. Napasenyas pa ito sa akin. As if saying, Im watching you!

Im dead!

Anong masama sa pag cheer ko sa kalaban. Wala kaya silang kakampi. Ako lang ang kakampi nila dito sa school.

Nag appear naman ang mga grupo ng kalaban sa isat isa. Saka napatingin sa akin si number 3 with a killer smile.

Ay gwapo ah?!

"Thanks!" Sumaludo pa ito sa kin.

Isang matamis na ngiti ang binigay ko dito. Wew, pa cute effect lang.

Nagtawag ng break ang coach nina Ethan. Malapit na yata matapos ang game at nangungulilat ang mga ito. Nakamasid lang ako dito. Ethan werent even listening to thier coach. Abala ito sa pagkukulikot sa cellphone habang nakaupo sa pwesto nito. Girls were calling his attention. Pero kiber ang beauty ng ice prince.

Napaigtad ako ng mag vibrate ulit ang cellphone ko. Napapadalas ata ang mga text messages ko ahh.. Binasa ko ang mensahe. To my suprise, kay Ethan galing ang mga yun.

What the hell are you doing on the enemy's bench?

Napatingin lang ako dito. Masama bang maupo dito? Saka mas maluwang area nila kesa kabila. Gusto kong mareply pero wala akong load eh. Kaya binalewala ko na lang ang messages nito. Pagkaraan ay nag ring ang cellphone ko. Saw Ethan now with his phone on his ear.

"Do you wanna die?!" Eto agad ang bungad nito pagkasagot ko sa tawag.

"Bakit ka ba nagagalit? May regla ka ba? Daig mo pa ang may PMS eh?"

Hindi ako nito sinagot sa halip pinatay na nito ang tawag. Sumipol na ulit ang referree na magsisimula na naman ang laro. Ano bang problema nito? Tumayo na ako saka lumapit sa unahang bahagi ng bench.

Hawak ng kalaban ang bola, Ethan was trying block the enemy from the ring. Napahawak ako sa baba ko. Nakaka-kaba at halatang napuno ng tensyon ang mga tao sa loob. The enemy is now trying to shot the ball, but in a sudden, naagaw ito bigla ni Ice Prince.

Wala sa loob na napalundag ako sa tuwa! I feel excited too. Parang ako na rin ang naglaro.

"Alcantara! I-shot mo yan!" I shouted at him. Hindi ko alam kung narinig ba ako nito dahil hindi lang ako ang napasigaw sa tuwa. From the 3 points line, Ethan position himself. He drive the ball, I saw him wink at me for a moment then take a shot.

Nakanganga lang ako habang dahan dahang lumipad hanggang sa pumasok ang bola sa ring.

Wow! Im amazed.

Binuhat ng mga kasama nito si Ethan sa tuwa. The crowd gone wild again.

"Ethan is back!!!" Sigaw ng mga ka team mates nito.

Nagtuloy tuloy ang laro. Now, Ethan is unstoppable. Kahit tatlong bantay na ang pinain sa kanya ay nalulusutan nito. Siguro nga, ito ang ace player ng team. Mabilis itong tumakbo since malaki ang mga hakbang nito. Sa taas ba naman nitong 6 ft, malamang hakbang higanti ang ginagawa ng lalaki. I saw that he is really good. Halos sa kanya lahat nanggagaling ang mga scores ng tigers. He really have the skill.

Nakangiti lang ako habang nanonood. He is awesome. Bawat galaw nito ay mas lalo akong mabibighani. Mas lalo akong nahuhulog sa lalaking ito. He looks perfect on the court. He moves like he own every shot.

I love you, Ethan! Narinig kong sigaw ng mga madlang people.

Napatingin ako sa grupo ng fans club nina Ethan. Gusto ko ring sumigaw ng I love you eh. But Im not that brave.

Mga halos kalahating oras din bago natapos ang laro. Napagod ako sa kakasigaw. Dalawang team kaya ang pinag-chi-cheer ko. Paupo't patayo ang ginawa ko mula sa upuan. Natentensyon din kasi ako sa laro. But in the end, Ethan's grouo win. Nag makalamang ang mga ito ay hindi na nakahabol ang kalaban. Or sabihin na nating, hindi na nila ito pinagbigyang makahabol.

Not bad! First time kong makapanuod ng larong basketball, and I enjoy the game. Ganito pala ka- exciting. I think I'm gonna watch it again.

Nagkamayan ang mga manlalaro. No hard feelings at sports lang ang lahat. Nag usap usap pa nga ang mga ito. Nagsilapitan na rin ang mga fans club ni Ethan at isa isang nanghingi ng grufie pictures sa buong tigers. Naging busy na ang mga ito sa nagawang tagumpay.

Natanaw ko ang isa sa mga kasama ni Ethan na palapit sa kinaroroonan ko. Patakbo ako nito akong nilapitan.

"Hey! Thanks for coming! You made us win!" Nakipagkamay ito sa akin.

Napakunot noo akong inabot ang kamay nito. How come, I made them win? Hindi naman ako ang naglaro kundi sila.

"Congrats! Magaling naman talaga kayo eh." Komento ko dito.

"But Ethan is at his best now."

I smiled to agree with what he said. Oo nga ang galing ni Ethan. Mas lalo akong humanga dito.

Nagpaalam na ako sa lalaki. Frank pala ang pangalan nito. Gwapo rin ito at matangkad. Lahat naman sila matangkad. Umalis na ako at nagpasyang umuwi. I had a great afternoon. Kaso sa kakapanood ko ng laro, naabutan ko ang tatay kong magkasalubong na ang kilay sa kakaantay sa akin sa labas ng eskwelahan. Haha.

Lagot!

"'>N��W�U�/

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