#i do not actually know the ethics of dating parents of students so this sort of semi-handwaves any policies that might be in place

[ratttoro]

its come to my attention that we as a society have decided homework is an evil government conspiracy meant to teach children how evil everyone is and woah woah woah can we not teach our children that the only place for learning is school?

first of all, kids should be constantly learning. their brains are expanding and are basically little sponges for new information, they need to be able to “self teach” some things and apply skills they’ve learned in the classroom at home. school in general is less about the actual material you’re learning about and more the actual process of learning something new, which is a very very very important life skill that your child deserves.

second of all, stop demonizing teachers. i’ve had horrible teachers, i dropped out my senior year and had to move schools to complete my education because of a teacher, i know they can suck, but a good lot of them are really just trying to do their jobs. kids and parents alike will take out any frustrations they have with the overall system out on their teachers and it’s exhausting. they’re trying. it’s hard to fit an entire lesson into an hour with a bunch of misbehaving children.

thirdly, just because something isn’t fun and exciting doesn’t mean its bad and evil. one more time, just because something isn’t fun and exciting doesn’t mean it’s bad and evil. there are necessary things in life that no one wants to do nor feels they should have to do, but alas, the job must get done. i’ve noticed a lot of this with our generation, “if _____ doesn’t appeal to me, i’m not going to do it and if the government wants me to do it well then they’re going to have to make accommodations!” (this does not apply to disabled/neurodivergent people who are unable to work, just the people who refuse to because it isn’t fun) but that isn’t how life works. the government doesn’t need you to get your job done, the rest of society where we really do all rely on each other does, though. teaching your kids from an early age that if you don’t find something fun you don’t have to do it until the system makes it fun is just setting them up tor failure and teaching them work ethic is optional in the real world, it teaches them that no one will rely on them and their contributions/hard work are meaningless at the end of the day unless there’s some sort of enjoyment while doing it. this also creates huge entitlement when it comes to doing anything they don’t want to do, which no one wants to deal with and very few will.

lastly, there are some children who are unable to do homework due to their living situations, and i agree that teachers should be easier on those students when it comes to due dates/the quality of work, and there is a genuine lack of empathy in the educational system towards children who are struggling in any sense, so yes, that needs to be changed along with most things about the system, but don’t try to erase important and necessary lessons

nope nvm, this is lastly, assuming this post is reaching mostly americans/canadians, be fucking grateful for the privilege you have to be able to attend school in the first place. do none of you guys hear stories of the countless women from other places saying what they would have done to be able to go to school? have you never met anyone who wasn’t able to be properly educated for one reason or another? be fucking grateful that you have the opportunity to learn freely and even raise your hand in class. be fucking grateful that you are in a public school rather than a residential school, be fucking grateful that you can even complain about the system to begin with (esp to teachers/administrators), be fucking grateful that there are people who think you deserve to be educated, and dedicated years of their lives to getting the right credentials in order to educate you. fuck.

[fanforthefics]

hello! 4. teacher/single parent au, tbear/gabe please

“What are you doing?” 

Gabe doesn’t jump, thank you very much; he just wasn’t expecting EJ to come into his classroom without knocking. Which was probably his first mistake. 

“Nothing.” 

“Do you just stand around staring into mirrors when the kids aren’t here?” EJ asks, perching on Gabe’s desk. 

“No,” Gabe retorts. He steps back from the mirror after one more shake of his head, then turns to glare at EJ properly. “I was just checking that I didn’t have any paint on me.” 

“Uh-huh.” EJ raises his eyebrows. “It’s last period. No one’s here to see you after this.” 

“No one,” Gabe agrees, glancing at the clock over EJ’s shoulder. Five minutes to the end of the kids’ arts period. Ten minutes to the end of school. 

“And if you were really worried, you’d have checked at the beginning of your free period,” EJ goes on, thoughtfully. 

“Get to your point,” Gabe snaps. Four minutes. He needs EJ out by then. 

EJ follows his look over his shoulder at the clock, then grins and pulls out his phone. “What are you doing?” Gabe demands. He doesn’t trust EJ even a little. 

“Checking NHL schedules,” EJ says. He’s not actually pressing any buttons on his phone. “Avs are home and don’t have a game, do they?” 

“Maybe. I don’t know.” 

“And it’s a Wednesday,” EJ goes on, still doing that stupid smirk. “Which means…” 

“It means nothing.” 

“And has nothing to do with a certain defenseman whose daughter is in your class?” 

“Cecy’s a great kid,” Gabe says, trying for calm. Three minutes. At least when the kids come back, EJ will have to leave. Or shut up. 

“With a father who you think is–” 

“He’s a good player,” Gabe interrupts, before EJ can go into exactly what Gabe has said about Tyson Barrie when he’s drunk and an Avs game happens to come on. So maybe he plays pretty hockey and is cute and solid in a way that makes Gabe want to mess up and is even cuter and snarkier and funnier in person and always picks up his daughter from school when he’s home and doesn’t have a game and is, Gabe found out after some guilty googling, single. That has nothing to do with Gabe making sure he looks good. “And a good dad.” 

“And that’s why you’re preening.” 

“I’m not preening.” 

“You’ve got a hair out of place.” 

“I don’t!” But Gabe glances at the mirror again, and ignores EJ’s laughter. So he wants to look good. That’s not a crime. 

“Don’t worry,” EJ says, somehow still intelligible through his laughter. “You’re still very pretty.” 

“Excuse me, I am the prettiest,” Gabe informs him. One minute. “And it has nothing to do with Tyson Barrie.” He pauses. “He’s not behind me or anything, is he?” 

“No, unfortunately,” EJ shakes his head. “But you know, the school year’s almost over.” 

“Yeah, I noticed.” 

“And that means his daughter won’t be in your class anymore.” 

“That is how school years work, yeah.” 

“So are you going to ask him out, then?” 

Gabe snorts. “Yeah, sure, I’ll just ask out the NHL player. Who has a daughter. With a woman.” 

“Have you heard his interviews? That man is not straight.” 

“EJ.”

“Fine, I’m not speculating or anything.” EJ holds up his hands. “Just saying. You’ll have nothing to lose.” 

“Cecy’s still in my class, I can’t think about that now,” Gabe informs him. There are things EJ doesn’t need to know. Like all his silly daydreams about the dates he’d take Tyson out on. But he’s right, too. As long as his daughter’s in his class, Gabe shouldn’t be thinking about that. And yeah, his interviews are–well, Gabe might daydream about what they mean–but Tyson’s never been connected with a man in his career, and Gabe’s not going to define him. 

EJ snorts. “You definitely aren’t thinking about anything, for sure.” 

“I–” The bell rings, and Gabe straightens, checks his hair one last time. “You’ve got to go.” 

“But I want to watch! I–”

“Out,” Gabe orders, and EJ sighs and goes. He pauses at the door. 

“Three months,” he points out. 

“Out!” Gabe repeats, and EJ goes as the kids stream back in and back to their desks, gathering up their stuff, and then it’s the usual chaos of getting the bus line sorted out as the kids whose parents pick them up wait. Getting everyone sorted actually does distract Gabe, until he straightens up from making sure Matt’s shoes are properly tied and there he is, helping his daughter put her jacket on. 

Really, it’s Gabe’s job to check in with the parents. That’s why he goes over to them. “Hi,” he says, and Tyson jumps and makes a noise that is clearly biting down on a swearword. 

“Oh, f–hi!” he says, with a guilty look at his daughter, who Gabe is certain has heard worse. “You’re here. Mr. Landeskog. Hi.” 

“You said that already,” Cecy points out. She’s a cute kid, with Tyson’s smile and curls and her mother’s eyes and build and snark that could have come from either of them, probably. 

“Yes, thank you, Ceec.” Tyson ruffles her hair. His cheeks are a little red. “Let’s definitely talk about how much of a mess daddy is, that sounds great.” 

“I’ve seen worse,” Gabe puts in. 

“Yeah, but maybe I’d like not to be in the bottom half of the messes you’ve seen,” Tyson tells him with a wry smile. “Just so I have some dignity left to keep me warm at night.” 

Gabe bites his lip on the offer to keep him warm at night. 

“Anyway,” Tyson goes on. “So. How’s Cecy been? Making trouble?” 

“No!” Cecy protest. “I was good. Right, Mr. Landeskog? I’ve been good?”

“Eh…” Gabe wiggles his hand, and she gives the most betrayed look Gabe’s ever seen. 

“No! That’s not true.” 

Tyson tilts his head at Gabe. “Hm. I don’t know…” 

“Daddy,” she whines, and Tyson laughs. 

“Yeah, of course. I guess I trust you more than Mr. Landeskog.” 

“I’m hurt,” Gabe tells him, and Tyson grins. 

“Well, if she’s been good, we can get ice cream.” 

“I see. So it’s an ulterior motive?” 

“Always. Because ice cream is…” he looks at Cecy expectantly, and she recites, 

“Definitely one hundred percent in daddy’s diet plan.” 

“That’s right.” He holds up his hand, and Cecy smacks it in a high five. “Okay, you good to go?” 

“Yeah–Cara!” Cecy yells, and then darts away to her friend, who’s talking to her mom. Tyson laughs, shakes his head. 

“Good thing I’m not in a hurry.” 

“Yeah.” Gabe nods. “That was a good game last night.” 

“You watched?” Tyson’s eyes go wide, then he keeps going. “I mean, of course you watched, you’ve said you’re a hockey fan before, but it could have been the SHL or something else in Europe, and even in Denver a lot of people keep to the hometown teams, and–” 

“I watched,” Gabe interrupts. “That was a nice goal in the second.” 

“Oh, thanks.”

“And a good post-game interview,” Gabe goes on, and Tyson groans and glares. “You watched that? Come on, that’s not fair.” 

“How many years of interviews have you given?” 

“Don’t you know you’re not supposed to ask a boy his age,” Tyson retorts, then adds. “And here I thought maybe I had some dignity left.” 

“Dignity’s overrated.” 

“Easy for you to say, you look like a Disney prince had a baby with a Norse god even after a day of dealing with third graders.” Gabe refuses to have a reaction over that. Or at least, not until he has some privacy. “Some of us don’t have that luxury.” 

“You seem to get by all right,” Gabe points out. 

“Yeah, it’s amazing what an NHL salary will do,” Gabe bites down on the definitely inappropriate things he could say about how little an NHL salary would matter to the right person. Who would care about how he’s cute and funny and a great dad and is standing right in front of him. “Which is definitely not what you are here to talk about, right, that’s probably some sort of harassment, sorry, I’ll shut up.” 

“It’s fine,” Gabe says, quickly. “I don’t mind.” 

“You’re the only one, then. I think even Nate–my best friend–”

“Yes, I know who Nate Mackinnon is.”  

“Well I didn’t know! Maybe you only happened to watch yesterday’s game. Maybe you live under a rock and don’t know who Nate Mackinnon is. I don’t know the secret life of teachers.”

“Well, we don’t disappear when school’s over.” 

“Yeah, that was a revelation,” Tyson agrees. “First time I saw a teacher in the grocery store I ran and hid behind a pyramid of chicken soup, and then i knocked it over and almost got a concussion.” Gabe can’t help bursting out laughing. Tyson shakes his head, looking rueful but also amused. Of course he’s charmingly self-deprecating. “Now I get that feeling with coaches.” 

“They can’t be that much older than you.” 

“Are you calling me old, Mr. Landeskog?” Tyson retorts, stressing the ‘mister.’ “Because I’ve got an entire hockey locker room who can vouch for the fact that I’ve never grown up.”

“Well, I’ve seen Cecy’s registration forms, Mr. Barrie,” Gabe replies, smirking. 

Tyson makes a face. “Ugh. Please no Mr. Barrie.” 

“Is that your dad?” 

“No, that’s the front office whenever they’re pissed at me. Or my agent, which is worse. I mean, the front office can fire me, but my agent can really fuck me over.” 

“You’ve played in the same town for most of your career.” 

Tyson’s eyebrows go up. “Which you know?” he asks. “Are you a fan, Mr. Landeskog?” 

“I told you I watched your game,” Gabe tells him, willing down the blush he knows is coming. 

“Yeah, but there are fans and there are fans. I knew you were a fan, but that’s different from being a fan and knowing player histories. Especially mine, I mean. There are people who know Nate’s name, and then there are people who know my name, eh?” Tyson grins. “So are you a fan?” 

Gabe glances around, but Tyson grinning at him and fuck it, there are only a few months left of school. He can do this much. “Maybe I’m just a fan of yours.” 

Tyson’s face goes red, and his mouth does something that doesn’t make noise but does make Gabe have to concentrate not to look at his lips. “Well, then you’re one of the only ones,” he finally comes to the conclusion. “But I’m glad to have one, at least. And one like you.” 

“Like me?” 

“You know, a fu–freaking–prince.” Tyson glances up at him, and Gabe is definitely not imagining that look. He wasn’t going to speculate about interviews, but he knows what it looks like when he’s being checked out. “Could do worse, I guess.” 

“I’m flattered,” Gabe retorts, and opens his mouth to say more, but then–

“Dad!” Tyson’s hit with four feet of eight year old. “Can we get ice cream now? Can Cara come?” 

Tyson’s focus immediately shifts, but his ears are still red. “Did Cara’s mom say she could?” he asks. 

“Yes!” Cecy insists, stomping her foot. “Da-ad, let’s go!” 

“Duty calls,” Gabe tells him, and Tyson looks at him, sidelong. 

“Yeah,” he says. “I guess it does. It was nice talking to you, Mr. Landeskog. I mean, it always is, but it was especially nice today. Not for any particular reason. Just because–”

“Dad!” 

“Yeah, right.” Tyson runs a hand through his hair. “See you later.” 

“Yeah,” Gabe agrees, and watches as they go, Tyson’s hand slipping easily into his daughter’s. 

He waits until they’re out of the room before he fist pumps, because he has that much dignity at least. 

///

“Congratulations.” 

“Oh, shit.” Tyson nearly drops his bottle of water, juggles it a little, but manages to catch it. “Oh, shit,” he repeats. 

“It’s okay, I know you’re not smooth,” Gabe manages not to laugh as he slides into place next to Tyson and the big blonde guy next to him who is definitely Nate Mackinnon. 

Tyson makes a face at him. “I’m a professional athlete, I’m usually at least coordinated.” 

“Didn’t you break your leg off the rink at Worlds a few years ago?”

“Yes, and no one knows why–no one,” Tyson stresses, stabbing a finger at his friend, who’s laughing behind his hand. “No one, Nate, shut up.” 

“Shutting up.” Nate holds up his hands, then looks at Gabe, definitely sizing him up. Gabe lets him, meets his eyes squarely. “So you’re the famous Mr. Landeskog?” 

“Nate!” Tyson groans, elbowing him. Gabe can’t help but grin. He was pretty sure he wasn’t reading this wrong, but this sort of confirmation is always good. 

“I think we can say Gabriel, now that the school year’s over.” Gabe holds out a hand. 

Nate takes it. “Nate Mackinnon.” His handshake isn’t hard, but it’s strong in a way that makes it clear this is a man who works with his body for a living. “I’m glad to finally meet you.” 

“And now he’s going to go find Cecy, and distract her for a few minutes” Tyson announces, shoving at Nate. “And not be here. Good bye.” 

“But Brutes–” 

“Not here,” Tyson repeats. It’s unclear the shoving is actually doing anything, given the good six inches Nate has on him, but Nate goes regardless, with a jaunty wave to Gabe. “Anyway. Sorry about him. He’s here because Cecy loves him but I meant to keep him away from you before he embarrassed me. I don’t need help with that.” 

Then he’s just smiling at Gabe, an eyebrow raised like it’s half a challenge, and Gabe considers beating around the bush, doing more of their half-flirting they’ve been doing for months, but it’s been months. “So, as of today, I’m no longer Cecy’s teacher.” 

“I thought teachers were supposed to be observant,” Tyson retorts, and when Gabe snorts, Tyson shrugs. “I don’t have to be nice to you to make sure my daughter gets a good grade. You can get the full Tyson Barrie experience now.” 

Gabe takes half a step closer. “I’d like that,” he says, making sure to pitch his voice low. He can see Tyson’s adam’s apple moves as he swallows. “Maybe over drinks?” 

Tyson swallows again, and his eyes dart around, to all the parents milling about the yard. “You know, there are things I can’t–I won’t be able to do, until I retire,” he says slowly. His eyes are fixed on Gabe, wary now. Serious. Gabe wonders if this is what he looks like on the ice; what he’d look like in bed. “It’s shitty, but that’s how it is.” 

“Yeah, I know, I get it.” Gabe takes the second half of that step closer. He’s thought about that. Thought about that, and thought about Tyson’s smile and how he is with Cecy and his arms and his humor. “I’d still like those drinks.” 

“Really?” Tyson bites at his lip. “Because I’d get it if you didn’t, being a secret can suck–” 

“Well, let’s be real, you’re getting old anyway,” Gabe says, and Tyson bursts out into a laugh even as he reaches out to the nearest flat surface to knock. “And, whatever. Let’s see how much the NHL can speculate about a bromance.” 

“Oh it’s a lot,” Tyson says, but he’s still laughing. “But, then. Drinks sound good.” 

“Great.” Gabe knows he’s smiling like a lunatic–if only because EJ is giving him ridiculous thumbs up from the doorway where he is talking to, of all people, Nate Mackinnon, which Gabe thinks would make him nervous if he wasn’t so happy. “Tonight?” 

Tyson’s eyebrows go up. “I’ve got Cecy tonight. Tomorrow?” 

“That’ll do,” Gabe allows. “I can text you the details?” He holds out his phone for Tyson’s number. Tyson enters it, and his fingers deliberately brush Gabe’s palm as he hands it back. 

Then he pauses. Gives a smile that’s halfway to a smirk. “You know, I can also sign an autograph, while we’re there. Maybe bring a jersey to sign. If you’re such a fan.” 

“I could be into that,” Gabe retorts, mock-thoughtful, and Tyson goes red but looks considering. Oh, Gabe thinks. This is going to be good. 

[ebp-brain]

Hi!!! I hope I'm not too late for the ask game about WIPs!! If you feel like, would you tell us about RS anticensorship??

This took awhile to get to, sorry! This fic is mostly just an outline at this point. As you’ll see, it’s basically a response to the Discourse about whether it’s bad to enjoy writing/reading about sexual encounters that would be Not Okay in real life. (spoiler alert: I do not think it is bad.)

It’s a Remus/Sirius fic in which they’re Harry’s guardians. He’s 15 and tells them he’s been hooking up with Draco. Remus and Sirius are totally freaked out. Here’s my outline for this part:

Harry was FOURTEEN LAST YEAR AND HE WAS HAVING SEX??????

“just hand jobs” “THAT IS NOT COMFORTING”

omg Harry is…gay? bi? fuck everyone is going to say it’s bc of us WHOOPS

are you…being…safe???

DRACO. MALFOY.

make sure no one is pressuring you?? also let’s talk STDs AHHH

DRACO MALFOY???????

meanwhile, Remus is feeling weirdly jealous because he never had sex as a teenager due to being closeted/anxious

So they’re basically trying to figure out how to both empower Harry and keep him safe while dealing with the weird feelings it’s bringing up about their own lack of sexual or romantic experience as closeted teenagers. BUT ALSO

Remus writes really kinky porn. Like, very “problematic” stuff—teacher/student, underage, sometimes including incest and noncon. He started writing it after Hogwarts, when he was pretty convinced he’d never actually have sex irl. The thing is that Sirius doesn’t know about it. Remus is pretty ashamed of it but writes in anyway. But now his anxiety sort of comes to a head because he is raising an actual teenager who is having actual sex. And of course the idea of Harry ever being coerced or pressured or worse is horrible to Remus. And suddenly he has to reconcile his erotic fantasies with his role as the parent of a teenager.

I haven’t outlined the whole thing, but at some point there is some question of Harry being pressured by an older student to have sex (he doesn’t, but he tells R/S about it), and Remus is basically like, OH. I can respond to this as a responsible and ethically sound adult even though I enjoy fantasizing about similar fictional situations. Like, of course I can. And he works through his guilt about his writing (with some help from Tonks) and tells Sirius, who is not at all upset by it. And probably they have an extremely awkward dinner in which Harry brings home Draco because they have started officially dating.

Writing it all out like this makes me want to revisit it! I have a bunch of other stuff to get through first but maybe someday! Thanks for asking about it (:

[psycholojosh]

Road to RPsy: A master's student's guide for Filipino psychology graduates in making a career headway in the Philippines - Part 1

Let's paint this picture for a moment...

You get into your psychology program (or any other program) in a Filipino college or university. You study hard. And then, you achieve your well-deserved bachelor's degree. While you shake hands and celebrate for about a month (just as you should), you sooner realize and ask, "Now what?" Then, you ponder on how to get your career in clinical psychology started. Possibly, you got anxious, confused, or maybe even determined.

If this is (or was) you, don't worry! You're perfectly okay. Trust me, I've been there before... and we shouldn't feel ashamed for this.

Which is why I'd like to take this time to write about my personal and professional experiences as a college graduate of psychology in the Philippines, and how I managed to craft my own headway into getting clinical training and graduate studies for clinical psychology. I sincerely hope that this little article would help a fellow psychology graduate craft their own headway into clinical psychology (or any other field of the sort). I'd also like to share some tips from my past and present mentors, colleagues, coworkers, and professors that I find useful to take note of.

I separated this into a series of articles to keep reading concise and organized. For this part, I start off with discussing...

What psychology careers in the Philippines looks like

How goals can be set in order to get an RPsy; and

Selecting the postgraduate school or program for you

Keep reading to find out more!

Key Points (TL;DR)

There are many myths and misconceptions that narrow one's view about psychology and its careers; but there are actually a lot of opportunities.

Keep yourself open to opportunities, be it for training or career, that will help propel you to snatching an RPsy license.

Clinical experience is key. But, do not discount non-clinical experiences as well.

Practice 'SMART' (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound) goal setting for your career.

Choosing a school is dependent on your preferred training, scholastic interests, career goals, personal motivations, and (financial) resources.

Before I begin...

I'd like to first disclose what my biases and limits are, and what potentially could be a matter that you, dear reader, should consider before taking any advice from me. So, here's a little bit about myself...

Firstly, I am a young adult and pretty much novice to the field of psychology. I have gone through two years (and counting) of clinical experience as a licensed psychometrician. I do not declare myself an expert yet, nor do I pride myself as the most reliable person in the field of psychology. This article is written purely in my personal perspective and experiences. That said, I will do my best to offer you up-to-date information and objectivity that may support or criticize my views.

Secondly, I come from a very middle-class family. My parents made just about enough for us to pay the bills, to feed, clothe, and shelter us, and to give us a decent education. I firmly think this disclosure is very important since not everyone has the same privileges in terms of education, opportunity, and resources. There are some career decisions that I have made or experienced because I had the capacity to make them so despite certain critical tradeoffs (like, getting less pay). As of writing, I would say that our status is still the same, even if I make my own profit with my college degree. I will do my best to be considerate about the differing backgrounds among people, especially when it comes to privilege offered by social class.

Lastly, I'd like to emphasize that my word is not gospel and should not be taken easily by those who seek importance or utility to what I will share. The tone I will use will be very personal - as this is my personal blog. Plus, I will be largely biased towards clinical psychology, as it is the field I am in. You may find that some pieces of advice will resonate more with you than others. Conversely, you might find that some pieces of advice may be unhelpful for you. Hence, I welcome any criticism to my personal views and open myself to a healthy discussion. (Feel free to reach me through my Ask page here on my blog.) I highly encourage you, dear reader, to look for more opinions from more seasoned professionals in the field.

Now, on to the article...

The current scene of psychology careers in the Philippines

As I was graduating, it was important for me to look for information about careers in psychology in the country. After all, as you will see later, getting an idea of psychology's zeitgiest (a term used by historians to refer to the salient "mood" or "spirit" of ideas or beliefs of, say, an academic field) this country will inform you in your career goal setting and considering options that will lead you to where you want to be.

Psychology in the Philippines has a lot of stereotypes, myths, and misconceptions brought about by pop psychology spread across the masses. Here are some of the popular ones (and my personal favorites) which you may have already heard from people around you:

"Sa HR mapupunta ang isang Psych grad." ("Psych grads end up in HR [work].")

"Psych ka? Magme-med/Maglo-law ka ba?" ("You study Psych? Are you pursuing med/law?")

"Wala naman masyadong pera/future sa Psych." ("There's no money/future in Psych.")

"Psych? So yung mga baliw yung trabaho mo?" ("Psych? So you work on crazy people?")

And there's plenty more where that came from. Funnily enough, my college friends and I used to do a game where we take a shot of liquor for each myth said to us. (Drink responsibly, kids!) But, as psychology graduates, we know that these aren't completely true.

Now, let's take a look at how we can argue in psychology's defense and dignity and accept what the common person has gotten correctly.

Psychology practice in the Philippines

It's important to note that the term 'psychologist' or 'psychology practitioner' has different meanings in various contexts. Often, we think about psychologists as those who does therapy and plays around with psychological instruments. While this is somewhat true, a more academic language would refer to a 'psychologist' or 'practitioner' as someone who earned their degree in psychology - regardless of specialty - and has built their career in praxis of psychology. As I go along in this section, I'll refer to the 'psychologist' as the latter definition.

Clinical and counselling. In a 2004 article by Cristina Montiel and Lota Teh published in the International Handbook of Psychology, the authors enumerated on and expounded the most popular fields and specializations that psychology practitioners work in. Clinical or counselling practitioners lead in this list, often delving into psychotherapy, interventions, and assessment in various settings -- of which I have had experience on. I think this appears to be only partially true today, which I'll explain in a bit. You would find most practitioners doing their clinical practice in private clinics, hospitals, and schools. It's important to note, however, that most practitioners of this subfield have postgraduate degrees, and - since the year 2014, when Republic Act No. 10029 was enacted - a board license from Philippine Professional Regulation Commission (PRC). These licensed professionals have the names: 'RPsy' for psychologists.

However, bachelor's degree holders were also permitted to practice with their own little license: an 'RPm' or 'registered psychometrician' - which I have. These licensed professionals, get to practice assessment and several other supportive clinical functions - but not psychotherapy. The catch? You legally and ethically need to be supervised by a licensed psychologist. I'd like to get into the nitty-gritty differences and nuances of these two licenses, but I'll save that for another article. In the meantime, you must understand that these two have disparities in terms of their education attainment, clinical skills, and professional autonomy.

During my oath-taking ceremony as a psychometrician in 2018, Dr. Regina Hechanova-Alampay, a known Filipina in the fields of industrial-organizational and community psychology (and the mom of one of my dear friends), stated in her keynote address that the approximate ratio of each RPsy to each Filipino citizen is 1 to 100,000. A 2018 study has pointed this approximation to be accurate. Similarly, my former clinical supervisor approximated that the ratio of RPsy supervisors to RPm supervisees is 1 to 2,000. These numbers are quite a lot! Needless to say, there is a shortage of supply of clinical practitioners for the demand and a large influx of RPm's that have less clinical autonomy. And with an ever-growing relevance and awareness to the field of mental health in the country, these numbers are concerning. But -- hold on. If there are a lot of RPm's being produced yearly, where do they go?

Industrial-organizational and human resources. Montiel and Teh accounted that the second most abundant field in the country is in industrial-organizational (I/O) psychology or human resources (HR). This is where I think most psychology graduates usually end up in after college these days. Daresay, this is the fastest way to earn money as a fresh college graduate. But does that mean that the stereotype is necessarily true? It really depends on the way an employer values the employee and how much one is capable of doing a job. Sometimes, you get paid more, just right, or less.

I/O psychologists or HR practitioners often deal in corporate or organizational settings, often concerned with their person-related matters. They have skills like recruiting talent or labor, assessing worker needs, evaluating individual performances, or developing workers of a company - just to name a few. Do they need a license like an RPsy or RPm? Not necessarily.

You would often find job postings for HR positions that would often "prefer" a psychology graduate with a license, but sometimes "require" it. Therein lies some grey areas about how the professional licenses' stipulations are interpreted. But, let's not get into that just yet. But in my opinion, if people saw the utility of getting a license (which has its own financial costs of acquiring) as a way to improve compensation or marketability in the workforce, then they should get it.

Not all industrial-organizational psychologists, however, delve into the office hours and paper works. Some others go into research - particularly on topics like employee behaviors, group dynamics, and so on. It's important to think that these types of practitioners are just as versatile as other subfields in psychology.

Academia and other niches of psychology. As per Montiel and Teh, another large chunk of practitioners often end up in the academe. They become educators in various levels, researchers, or expert consultants depending on their interest, skill, and reputation. For example, developmental psychologists (or those who specialize in child psychology) get hired in preschools or alternative modes of learning. It was also mentioned briefly that social psychologists often find themselves in the social development sector, like the National Economic Development Agency (NEDA) or the Department for Social Welfare and Development (DSWD). Other common settings for psychology graduates to work in includes government facilities and the military, where their knowledge about human behavior are often found useful.

Research skills are also found useful in areas like market research and analytics. Because psychology graduates have knowledge about fundamentals of statistics and psychological measurement, a lot of these businesses employ their help in order to understand their target market's consumer behaviors and make informed decisions to increase profit. Other information about making a career in business can come be read in a lot of psychoeducational websites, like in Verywell Mind.

Overall, there is a plethora of careers a psychology graduate can delve into, especially for a fresh graduate like yourself. Over time, you would find that certain subfields would resonate more with you than others. You may often wonder which one - or a combination of more - would lead you to your career or personal ambitions. Now that you know how vast a career in psychology can be, it's a matter of choice and planning ahead, which leads me to the next section.

Goal-setting: Which road to take and what to expect

Eyeing the precious RPsy license won't be an easy task. Then again, would the hardships matter if it's worth it anyway? It's important for you, dear reader, to think about how you want to get to that goal.

Should one want to take a straightforward path, she or he would have taken their master's or doctorate studies in clinical or counselling psychology for the following three to five years (with coursework, practicum, and perhaps thesis or dissertation), then take the board exam from the PRC. I have a couple of friends who have done so, and it works for them.

However, for the likes of many of us - myself included - we may not have the same luxury of time or resources to afford us this direct route. Because of many personal needs (ahem-- financial), we may need to find a way to secure these as we go along our road to the RPsy. And how could I forget the costs of postgraduate studies alone? Which is why we'll need to earn or find income.

The best job or experience that can afford you a good head start in clinical psychology is the one closest to it. As my former supervisor, Paula, once said, "Clinical experience is key." For example, you can find psychometricians assisting with psychological assessments in various settings. Others delved into social or community work -- sometimes as a volunteer. The likelihood for one to get accepted in clinical or counselling training programs, like a postgraduate degree or certification training, is increased when one has had a hand on a similar line of work. But this is not to say that any other job is unimportant -- no. There's growing research on the various applications of mental health practice on non-clinical settings, like schools, offices, and even micro-communities. The possibilities are actually numerous. That said, I cannot guarantee how abundant these opportunities are.

There are a few things to consider when looking for a job or a source of income:

In terms of career, what are your yes's, maybe's, and no's? Make individual lists of the occupations you can say these three answers to.

How soon are you planning to achieve an RPsy license? As soon as the next four years? Or, maybe you want to take it slow and say ten?

What job and/or study opportunities are available to you at the moment? How comfortable will the setup be for you?

How much resources and time are available to you for work, study, and personal matters? Which of these do you prioritize more?

How much are you willing or do you need to be compensated to afford such a lifestyle?

As you formulate answers to these questions (especially, the last two), keep in mind that a more effective goal setting follows a 'SMART' process. That is: it is specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound. (More info about this process right here.) Patterning our goals to these dimensions helps us look at ourselves objectively and find an integrated way to live our lives productively.

In my personal experience, after graduating college, I took a two month break to enjoy the fruits of my hard-earned college degree with a "vacation" (which mostly staying home, if I'm being honest). In my mind, I knew that getting a master's degree is a must for me; a ladderized doctorate program was also amenable but I wanted to get that training abroad. But, I wanted to make myself more immersed in the field before I can enter a graduate program. I applied to different jobs - a psychological services consultant (which I primarily wanted), a personal development teacher in senior high, and a research analyst. Luckily, I got the job that I wanted and reaped clinical experience. (I'll write more about my first experiences in the clinic in another post.) A year later, I applied and got into the clinical program of the University of the Philippines. And now, I've been taking coursework on clinical psychology while working as a research associate of a particular office in the same university.

I understand, however, that not everybody could find the "perfect" balance or ideal solution to all of these concerns. In fact, I don't think anyone can -- unless you were blessed with such a life. Why? This is where I reflectively talk about my privilege (as I did at the beginning). Awareness of your own opportunities makes us think fully or subconsciously about our own status in the social system. Whether we like it or not, it affects many of the career - and more broadly, life - decisions depending on where we stand in our lives. Which is why I advocate for practicality. We may not always select the ideal -- but the principle of survival is important, especially in an underdeveloped country like the Philippines. As Montiel and Teh pointed out, poverty and economics have affected psychology practice and it opportunities in the country.

Can goals or plans change? Short answer is 'yes'. There are many reasons why our plans change. It may be because we find ourselves being presented by new or better opportunities. Or perhaps, we discover more personal insights and realizations about the career we want and how to get it. Life can be complex to influence our decisions within or without our control. Whatever the reason is, it is important for one to be able to evaluate one's strengths and weaknesses, limits and boundaries, and our emotions and motivation to keep us going.

Choosing your school: Which one should I go to?

It's very common for a psychology graduate to ask: Where should I get my clinical training? Again, this is dependent on your resources, time, and preferences. Coupled with these is the opportunities (or as Bandura would put it - chance encounters and fortuitous events).

Locally, there are about 60% of schools that offer master's degrees in clinical or counselling psychology as per Commission of Higher Education (CHED). A fewer percentage offers Ph.D. or doctorate equivalent degrees in clinical or counselling psychology, the three most famous being (as per Montiel and Teh): the Ateneo de Manila University, the University of the Philippines, and University of Santo Tomas. However, there is a growing number of urban and rural schools that offer postgraduate studies and attract local aspirants to enroll in their programs. At the top of my mind, St. Louis' University in Baguio City has been regarded as one of the best in developmental psychology (currently considered as a viable alternative to clinical psychology). Likewise, the De La Salle University in Manila, a member of the colloquially regarded "Big Four Universities," is gaining traction for their clinical program very recently.

Focusing on a school's reputation is not enough, however. What, us, clinical psychology hopefuls often look over is the training itself. Circling back to my guide questions on goal setting, preferences often come into play when deciding your training. For most, who prefer a general track in clinical psychology, many schools offer a flexible education to ensure you get the wide knowledge of the field, without undermining the core or essentials. Others may teach clinical psychology in a more specific way, favoring practical experiences like internships over theorizing in the classroom. Factors like faculty composition and expertise, paradigm, and school culture often influence how these training programs are developed. What I find helpful to attain this information is to ask these departments and institutions directly. Another approach is asking a friend taking up a program in that school. No harm in inquiry! Ask away.

Of course, like what I have also emphasized in this article, is the sensitive yet important issue of money. To be specific, your tuition. Clinical training in the Philippines ranges from ₱10,000 to ₱50,000.00 a year. The trend (as I've observed from applying in different schools) is that the more privatized and more "complex" the education, the higher the cost. Public schools often come cheaper than private schools. Consider your capacities for funding your education (including where it comes from) and weigh it with your preferences to make an optimal choice of school or program.

A popular notion among graduate students, or those heading into graduate school, is that public schools, like where I study, often take longer to finish a master's degree than others. Well, there are many factors to this. One is faculty size, for example. How many qualified teachers does the school have that supplies a smooth progression for a graduate student to complete their degrees? Another factor - which many often forget to attribute as well - is the student's motivation. It is not uncommon for a graduate student to fluctuate in wanting to accomplish their degrees. It really depends on how determined one is to see things through (which takes a lot of doing, if I do say so myself).

Overall, choosing a school is much less of an issue when it comes to time, but more so when it comes to practicality. In my opinion, any school that gives you basic competencies, regardless of reputation, is enough. In fact, most of my supervisors did not even settle for their graduate training alone. The field of clinical psychology (much like the other fields) is ever changing and adapting to the times. You often find a lot of trainings, seminars, and specialization programs that practitioners study or enroll in order to keep their practice up to date and ethical. Learning and personal growth, especially as clinicians, should not stop after we receive our degrees and licenses. Again, this calls back to the point of keeping an open eye and open mind on the opportunities that come our way.

--

Now that we discussed the first three tips, I plan to take a break here and let you, dear reader, reflect on things that will help you make your headway to that RPsy license. Do more reading. Ask questions. Seek answers. And explore yourself and the world to get a better sense of the pathway ahead.

I do hope that this discussion helps! See you on the next one.

[celosiaa]

Submission by @entitynumber5: Hi Connor, I hope you’re having a WONDERFUL birthday and that you get to take a break from studying to do the things you enjoy and just have the lovely day you deserve!!! For this morning’s “write what I like” sprint (trying a new method of getting it all out before I have to put the brain into study mode), I wrote a lil something about 🎃 spooky season birthdays 🎃set in the Emmaverse… which turned out kind of long and a bit sappy. So there is no pressure to read it! I just love these characters :’) the working title is “Martin and Jon get proven wrong by an adorable five year old”.

Content warnings: brief mentions of blood, alcohol and minor injury (in relation to Martin working a Halloween paramedic shift); food.

Emma is obsessed with birthdays. Just not her own.

She turned five in May, and no matter how special they tried to make the day—with rainbow layer cake and carefully-selected presents and a visit to the roller-skating rink with her best friends—she didn’t seem half as excited as when it was someone else’s birthday. She would hardly sleep the night before friends’ parties. She spent hours wrapping the presents she picked for them with ribbons and bows and even confetti stuffed inside the paper. The only time they could encourage her to practice the piano for her weekly lessons was when she played the Happy Birthday song over FaceTime for her friends’ birthdays that were during school holidays.

The only thing Emma seems to have held onto from her own birthday is the notebook given to her Georgie and Melanie. Martin seems to remember there being two: one with little cartoon ghost drawn in the front by Georgie and the other with a scribble of the Admiral by Melanie. But Emma only carries the one around with her everywhere, and Martin is starting to doubt his own memory about there being a duplicate.

She has it with her now, as they sit outside the lecture theatre where Jon is currently teaching. In the too-big chair beside the door, her legs swing as she holds the notebook very close, staring intently at its pages while she wriggles her fluffy purple pen in thought.

“Daddy,” Emma says, in that voice that means she has a Very Serious Question, “When is your birthday?”

Martin is still a little dazed from nearly a week of night shifts. It’s the first time in six days that he hasn’t been working or sleeping at this time in the afternoon, and while walking with Emma to Jon’s work to surprise him at the end of the day seemed like a nice idea in practice, he really wishes he was lying on the sofa. They could be watching Peppa Pig for the thousandth time. Or getting started on dinner, which he isn’t going to let Jon make after a long day of teaching. He’s been mentally calculating how many hours it is until he can go to bed, how many tasks he has to do before then.

This feels like a selfish thought, though, and he pushes it aside quickly in favour of smiling at Emma. “My birthday?”

“Yes,” Emma replies, still very grave, “That’s what I said. At school today, Miss Jones made us all put stickers on the big calendar on the wall for our birthdays. I wrote down all of my friends’ birthdays.”

“That’s nice.”

“And now I want to write down yours.”

“Okay, well, my birthday is next month.”

Emma frowns. “Next month. That’s…” she counts on her fingers until she seems to reach the answer she’s looking for. “October?”

“It is!” Martin grins. “Well done.”

Emma’s little frown doesn’t ease. “What day?”

“Well, do you know how many days are in October?”

Emma thinks. Shakes her head.

“There are thirty-one days in October,” Martin tells Emma, “And my birthday is on the very last day.”

Emma nods and returns to her notebook, slowly enunciating the words as she writes them down: “Oc-to-ber three-one.”

Martin wonders if Emma realises his birthday coincides with Halloween. Besides birthdays, she still doesn’t seem too interested in dates, no matter how many times her teacher makes her write them at the top of every page in her workbook. And during previous years, they celebrated Martin’s birthday the day before or after Halloween itself, so they can separate the two events, although perhaps she doesn’t remember.

Before Martin can ask, the door of the lecture theatre opens and students start filing out. Emma puts away her notebook and pen, her frown of concentration replaced by a glowing smile as she waits, bouncing excitedly in the chair, for her Baba to notice them waiting just outside.

*

“Jon,” Martin whisper-shouts as he tiptoes into the house after his shift, hoping he doesn’t wake Emma—but that his husband knows it’s urgent. “Jon, Jon, Jon.”

Jon emerges from the kitchen, wearing a pair of yellow washing up gloves dripping soap suds and a look of alarm. “What’s wrong?”

Martin ushers him back into the kitchen and shuts the door as quietly as possible, hoping it won’t wake Emma—or, worse yet, the cats, who will sit outside any closed door and cry to be let inside no matter what activity they were engaged in before.

“Martin,” Jon says, “What’s going on?”

“They just released the shifts for the next few weeks,” Martin replies, “And I’m working.”

“Well, good. I should hope so.”

“On my birthday.”

Jon’s expression merges into one of comprehension: Emma. And her newfound obsession with birthdays. “Ah.”

“Yep.”

“I don’t suppose you could swap shifts with someone?” Jon asks.

Martin sits down at the table, lowering his head into his hands. He wants to shower, change out of his paramedic uniform, but he knows he won’t be able to focus on anything else until they’ve had this conversation. “No one’s going to willingly take a Halloween shift. For a start, Andrew is terrified of clowns. And people are usually drunk, and it’s actually really hard to tell the difference between real and fake blood.”

“We could celebrate the day after,” Jon says, taking off the washing up gloves and sitting opposite Martin. He reaches across the table to take Martin’s hand. “I mean, you were born five minutes before midnight. It wouldn’t be a lie so much as a… slight shifting of the truth.”

“Jonathan Sims.” Martin gapes across the table at him. “Are you suggesting we lie to our daughter?”

“No!”

“Yes.”

“No, Martin,” Jon says again, “I’m simply suggesting we separate your birthday from Halloween, as we have done every year, and not draw attention to the fact because our daughter is currently obsessed with other peoples’ birthdays.”

“And it might upset her if she knew we were actually celebrating on the wrong day.”

“Exactly.”

Martin sighs. “I don’t know. It feels… sort of wrong.”

“Apparently, children under the age of seven have no concept of the passing of time and—”

“Did Tim tell you that?”

“No.”

“Oh, god. It wasn’t Helen, was it? Please tell me you haven’t been having philosophical discussions about parenting with Helen again.”

“Martin,” Jon interrupts, “It was in the parenting book you gave me.”

“Huh. I don’t remember that chapter. Oh, god, maybe I should re-read it. The whole thing. Beginning to end. I—”

“Martin.” Jon squeezes his hand. “You deserve a day of your own. Tim and Sasha already agreed to take Emma trick-or-treating on Halloween. She will be focused on that for most of the day; she’s already talking about how excited she is. Let us spend the day after that treating you to all the wonderful things you deserve on your birthday—and every day.”

Martin manages a small smile, although every instinct inside of him is telling him not to accept Jon’s proposal. Not because he is worried about the ethics of manipulating their daughter’s concept of time—although this is a concern, too—but because he doesn’t want Jon to feel like he has to do any of this. To make a whole day about him, even if he takes great pleasure and care in doing the same for Jon on his birthday.

“Thanks, Jon,” Martin murmurs.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“Now, why don’t you go and have a warm shower? I’ve put the hot water on so it shouldn’t run out while you’re in there this time.”

Martin smirks. “Are you saying I smell?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?” Martin presses, teasing now. “Because I did have to treat a farmer who’d been kicked by one of his cows this evening.”

“Okay, alright, yes. Yes, you smell. Please go and have a shower.”

Martin laughs and gets up from the table. “I’m going, I’m going.”

“That really is disgusting, Martin.”

“It’s actually a pretty funny story. About the farmer, I mean. He’s fine, by the way. I’ll tell you about it when I’m out of the shower.”

Jon shakes his head. “Why today, of all days, have you abandoned the notion of showering before you sit down at the dinner table?”

“I had something important to tell you!”

“Fine. Alright.” Jon shakes his head again. “Now please have a shower. For your sake as much as mine.”

“Love you,” Martin sing-songs as he exits the kitchen. He hears Jon’s gentle laugh chase him into the warmth of the bathroom, where Jon has put on the radiator and left him a fresh towel. He smiles, feeling his love for Jon balloon in his chest, and settles into the sensation being home.

*

Martin’s Halloween—and birthday—shift is so busy that he barely has time to check his phone. Tim has sent an album of photos of him, Sasha and Emma out trick-or-treating, dressed as Mike, Sulley and Boo from Monsters, Inc. Jon has been updating him on the number of trick-or-treaters who have visited their house (fifty-four, as of ten thirty p.m.), and how Iris and the cats are holding up with the constant ringing of the doorbell.

On his break, Martin quickly texts Tim to watch his glucose levels and not to forget his insulin (to which Tim replies yes, sir with a number of yellow heart emojis). He also texts Sasha to say she can take home any of the Skittles they get on their expedition, since they’re her favourite but Emma hates them. He tells Jon he loves him and to give Iris a pet on his behalf and that there’s some spare sweets under the sink, if they’re running low. Then it’s back to work.

The shift passes quickly, in the end. There is so much to do and no time to think about anything other than their patients. He does get given a toffee apple by someone dressed as a Minion at a student house party, and he narrowly avoids getting his face painted by twins who are the same age as Emma while his team are checking their mother’s twisted ankle after a fall trying to get to the door in time for a last-minute delivery of sweets. It’s not an awful shift, but it is, like always, exhausting and difficult in the same measure as it’s rewarding and hopeful.

By the time he gets home, all he wants to do is sleep. Emma is tucked into bed, fast asleep, while her nightlight projects solar systems onto the ceiling. Jon, too, is sleeping soundly with the cats for company. Iris barely looks up from her bed when he comes inside, but she gives a little wag of her tail each time he passes down the hallway to shower or get a drink of water. There’s a plastic pumpkin full of Emma’s sweets on the table, next to the empty bowl that had once been full of treats to hand out to their visitors.

Martin’s smiles—it looks like a night well-spent for his family—and this thought carries him through an exhausted shower before he crawls into bed next to Jon. Jon must be tired, too, because he doesn’t stir. Martin makes a mental note to check his joints aren’t playing up from all the getting up and down from the sofa during the trick-or-treat visits.

Sometime later, Martin wakes to the soft click of the door as it opens. He squints against the light bursting around the edges of the still-shut curtains, expecting to see Jon tiptoeing to the bathroom to get ready for the day. Instead, Emma is creeping inside, holding a tray of pancakes while Jon follows behind, balancing two cups of tea.

“Happy birthday!” Emma says, as she places the tray down on the bed next to Martin. “We made spooky pancakes!”

Martin rubs the sleep from his eyes and sits up fully. He glances at the alarm clock next to the bed: 11:42 a.m. He’s been asleep for just over six hours, but it somehow feels longer and yet not enough. “It’s not—”

Jon clears his throat.

“Oh. Oh, thank you, Emma! These are wonderful.”

The pancakes are, indeed, spooky. Emma has used a pumpkin cookie cutter to shape them and then drawn on funny faces with fruit and syrup. No longer responsible for balancing the tray, Emma looks at Jon, a little uncertain, and Jon nods in encouragement as he places their cups of tea down on the bedside table.

“I made you a present,” Emma says almost shyly.

Martin smiles gently at her. “That’s very kind of you. Thank you, Emma.”

Emma pulls something off the tray. It’s the second notebook, the one Martin thought he’d imagined, wrapped in a glittery silver ribbon and some confetti streamers. She offers it to Martin, and he takes it carefully, holding it as if it might fall apart in his hands.

“You can open it,” Emma tells him seriously.

Martin unwraps the ribbon. Emma takes it from him, along with the confetti, perhaps to reuse for another present. Slowly, Martin cracks open the notebook to the first page. There is Georgie’s ghoulish sketch, alongside a new inscription in Emma’s handwriting: Sorted Poems By Emma K. Blackwood-Sims. For Daddy’s Birthday. October 31.

Martin feels something tender and soft unfurl in his chest, until he’s certain he is going to cry. He begins to flick through the pages, but Emma says: “Wait!”

Martin stops. “What is it?”

“Look.” Emma climbs on to the bed, elbowing her way into the space next to him, and reaches across Martin to open the notebook on the first page again, where her inscription is. She points at her name.

“It’s meant to say assorted poems,” Jon says, “But neither of us were sure how to spell it.”

Martin laughs, the sound a little wet and shaky with the tears he can feel building. Jon hates spelling. It’s his least favourite type of homework to help Emma with.

“Look,” Emma says again, “I wrote my name like yours!”

Martin smiles. “Blackwood-Sims? But that’s your name, too.”

“No,” Emma insists, “Emma K Blackwood-Sims. Like you! Like a proper poet.”

“Oh,” Martin murmurs, “Oh.”

He’s sure he and Jon will laugh about this later. Martin doesn’t actually have a middle name. Emma does, but it certainly doesn’t begin with K. But right now, he feels tears on his cheeks as he takes in his daughter’s hard work.

Emma reaches for his face, patting away his tears with the palms of her hands. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, I promise,” Martin replies, sniffling in an attempt to draw back the tears, “I’m happy. And I love you so, so much.”

Emma frowns. “Will pancakes make you feel better?”

“I’m alright, Emma. I promise. These are happy tears.”

“Pancakes always make me feel better,” Jon announces, climbing onto the other side of the bed and sliding back underneath the covers. He settles Emma down in the middle of them, handing her a mug full of juice. She doesn’t drink tea yet, but she doesn’t like to be left out when they do, so she has her own mug.

“These look wonderful,” Martin tells them, arranging the tray so they can all reach. Emma takes a plate and hands it to Jon, then does the same for Martin, before grabbing the final one for herself. “You’re getting very good at pancakes.”

“Baba said we can learn French toast next,” Emma says.

“Wow. That’s big.”

Emma nods. “It’s more difficult than normal toast.”

Martin chuckles. “It certainly is.”

They distribute the pumpkin-shaped pancakes between them. While they eat in bed, they tell each other stories about their Halloween night. Jon talks about the costumes of the people who visited their house, how many compliments they got on their pumpkin carving skills. Emma narrates her trick-or-treating adventure with Tim and Sasha. Martin shares the safest tales of his nightshift, the funny costumes he saw and the extravagant decorations at the parties they visited.

Martin is exhausted again by the time they’ve finished the pancakes. Jon insists on taking their empty plates back to the kitchen and making them another cup of tea, while Emma snuggles against Martin’s side. She rests her head on his shoulder.

“I know it’s not your birthday, Daddy,” Emma whispers.

Half-asleep until now, Martin grunts himself awake. “What was that, sweetheart?”

“I know it’s not really your birthday,” Emma tells him, not moving from where she’s clinging to his arm, “Your birthday was yesterday. On Halloween.”

“Oh, Emma, we—”

“It’s okay,” Emma says, “It’s like when we had a party on Saturday even though my birthday was on Wednesday because I had school.”

“Yeah.” Martin stokes his hand through Emma’s hair. “It is a bit like that.”

“I still get to say happy birthday.”

“You do.”

“But can we have a party on the right day next year?” Emma asks.

“For your birthday?”

“No, for your birthday.”

“Oh.” Martin laughs. “Yes. It might not be a party, if I have to work again, but we can do this. This is lovely. Thank you for being so thoughtful. And I’m excited to read your poems.”

“Baba said they were good.”

“Well, that’s high praise indeed.”

“It was fun.”

“That’s good. That’s what matters most when you make things.“

Emma wriggles around until she’s grinning up at him. “Can I read your poems now?”

Martin sighs, barely supressing a laugh. This isn’t the first time she’s asked. “Emma.”

She sticks her bottom lip out, pouting in a way that breaks Martin’s heart to the point where he can never turn her down when she’s looking at him like this. “Please.”

“Alright,” Martin gives in, “I’ll read you one tonight. Before bed.”

“Yay!” Emma’s grin grows even wider. "Thank you, Daddy.”

“Thank you. And I love you very, very much.”

“Love you, too.”

They settle back down. Martin dozes a little again, a smile on his face, as he thinks about telling Jon later that their daughter very much does understand the concept of time. There really are some things parenting books don’t prepare you for—like the way his love seems to grow with each day he gets with Emma and Jon, even when he thinks it’s impossible, that he already loves them more than any person can.

Some things are gifts even when they are not given as such, and Martin is beginning to allow himself to think of his life with his daughter and his husband as one. He didn’t ask for it with words or lists. He doesn’t know, even now, if he deserves it. But it’s his. And he will treasure it always.

Not featured: Martin realising what he’s agreed to and frantically trying to find a non-angsty poem he can read to his five-year-old daughter. Jon thinks the whole thing is hilarious.

<3

[citruli]

Putting thoughts on TGWDLM AU here. Hidden under the cut for lots of text, TGWDLM spoilers, mentions of possession, and character death. it’s not nearly as dark as I make it sound though

It’d be Atsutodo centric, w Atsushi as Paul and Totty as Emma. They’re like the only characters that wouldn’t need a huge rewrite, maybe just make Atsushi a little more charming than Paul. I’d also make their relationship more established, they don’t have to already be a couple but definitely more friendly and crushing a lot more obviously.

Osototo could be Sam and Charlotte but not without a HUGE overhaul of their characters. Charlotte is too much of a coward to be a good fit for Totoko and I would just eliminate the fact that Sam/Osomatsu is a cop. Osomatsu is actually kinda tough because I don’t really like him in any other role so he’d end up being the one who’s most like their canon self. Like he’d just be A Guy that Totoko is dating and shows up later to try and kill her. The main draw of Osototo in these roles is the absolute powercouple-ness that comes after they both get possessed, as brief as it is before they die for real.

Nyaa-chan could be Ted but again with a big change of the role. Mostly I just think it’d be funny of Totoko was cheating on Osomatsu w her. She’d be a lot less of a sleazeball and more just concerned/crushing on Totoko. 

Ichimatsu as Alice started as a joke but then I thought about it for more than two seconds and OUCHIES! A secret longing to be loved and wanted by his family only to grow resentful when he feels like he’s being sidelined and ignored? And he doesn’t even get to have that before he gets possessed? Fucking ow! Debating if I’d still want him to be a teenager or an adult, but I would put Choromatsu in Bill’s place regardless and just change their relationship so they’re bothers instead of father/son. Theyd be the only two of the Matsus who are actually related in this AU.

Choromatsu as Bill probably wouldn’t need too much reworking? Just again they’re brothers and instead of an ex-wife he’s fighting with over Ichimatsu he’s just trying to get custody of him after their parents passed? Assuming I go the teen Ichimatsu route. But oooooohhh my god the ANGST the HURT of him blaming himself for Ichimatsu’s death. Being unable to shoot Ichimatsu himself and getting killed for it. Iro angst is OUT Nenchuu angst is IN.

Yes Yanagida is here. Yes he’s Deb. Choromatsu likes him a little more than Bill did Deb in the OG muscial.

And that leaves Karamatsu. The catalyst for this AU that now haunts me. Show Stopping Number is the most Karamatsu bullshit I’ve ever seen and there’s no fruitcake that could fit the role of Professor Hidgens like he would. Specifically thinking Lawyer Karamatsu for this to get that Hidgens level of bonkers. I forget if they ever established what Hidgens teaches but I guess for this AU I’d just make it … ethics or something I don’t actually know what law professors teach. But it’d need to be something most students take so Totty has a reason to be there and know him. 

Jyushimatsu.....I just don’t have a good spot for him. All that’s really left are background characters or to maybe rewrite it so he and Ichimatsu are twins but I don’t know. I cant figure out a good way to shoehorn him in. 

I’m talking as if I’m going to do anything with this AU but I don’t honestly know. A musical About musicals is probably the worst media to try and convert to any sort of fic or whatnot. But I don’t have the time or energy to make it a full comic, I have no ability to make this a real musical, so fic is the only feasible option.

I might just be a hater but I personally am not a fan of reading lyrics, if I see it in fics I usually just skip over it because it just ever has the same affect as hearing it for me. But maybe I'm wrong and people don’t mind it? The other option is to eliminate the fact that the aliens make people sing and just have it be regular possession etc, but then I feel it just becomes another zombie au and you miss out on a lot of great moments that come with the songs.

There’s a chance I might still write a fic for this once I figure out how to approach it. because who doesn’t like reading stories where everyone is dead at the end?

[sirfluffig]

(Sir) Silvio Durante

Chosen of Laverna

"I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly … stupid."

- Captain Jack Sparrow

Silvio Durante is the first son of a rather big family which originates in Rome itself. While their family tree is able to spread into hundreds upon hundreds other families, there is one consisting line of Durantes throughout almost all of history and it doesn't seem like there is going to be much change in the future. It is a family tradition that the children of said family branch are sent to the locally very known Olympia School of Magic to get educated under a specific gods guidance. While Family Durante is known for mostly being guided by the gods Mars and Iuno, there always were a few outsiders. Nonetheless, they accept any honorable Guide with welcoming open arms.

As part of this particular family branch, the young Silvio Durante was born in Rome and was homeschooled in fight and wisdom by his respective tutors, seeing that his parents never got the time to actually care for him. But these tutors were merely anyhow successful in their work and ethics. Silvio is a rather mischievous and cunning student, his overly developed charisma allowed him to charm his way out of problems, for example when he forgot to do his homework or mocked the teacher... while his bright and resourceful mind helps him coming up with a plan B if his silver tongue won’t be enough. 

If not forcefully tutored, Silvio spent a lot of time alone in his dark and shadowy room reading, drawing or partly also singing in foreign tongue that he picked up along the way. He also is very fascinated by muggle stage magic which lead him to train cards tricks and other classical manners of illusions and manipulation.

While many people may consider it unhealthy, Silvio actually did a lot of things under the cloak of the darkness, which can be dated back to the earliest days of his childhood, when he turned off the lights as soon as he entered a room, claiming that he would see better that way. 

Later on, when Sir Cyrus Durante and his wife Lady Fiona Durante got suspicious of their son's unique behaviour, they took him to see a children's doctor. Said doctor discovered that bright and pure lights lead to unspeakable painful headaches for the noble adept. From this day on, Silvio mostly slept through the day and rose to act at night. When he was awake during daytime, Silvio often wore and still wears sunglasses to protect his sensitive eyes. The general lack of sunlight made the boys skin turn very pale and prone to sunburns if not covered in cloth.

Now you might think that such an extroverted character shouldn't be all alone every day, only having himself around and even though he appears to be a social chameleon, Silvio prefers to keep away from the warm and bustling cities.

So it is indeed no wonder that when he attended the Olympia School of Magic, upon the sorting he was chosen by nobody less than the infamous and often quite mistrusted  Goddess of Lies, Trickery and Darkness: Laverna. Also known as the Matron of Criminals, Mother of Thieves and Protector of Charlatans.

The Durante family had to endure a lot of outsiders in their noble family, where honored warfare and educational wisdom are the top priorities and yet they gladly accepted these breaks but being chosen by such a disgraceful and unhonorable deity, couldn't be left unpunished in the eyes of Lord and Lady Durante.

Silvio was disowned and renounced all connections to his yet so "loyal" family that very day. Who takes care of him now, is broadly unknown and not an easy to access information. Some students mumble about the rumour that Silvio has been taken in by the Darkness or Laverna herself, but these are all just theories.. 

While receiving the blessing of said generous trickster, Silvio got a lot of helpful abilities bestowed upon him. For example, his most used talent is Shapeshifting. The possibility manipulate his Appearance or his voice to appear to his bidding. Bending the reality to his will and making people believe what he deems them to believe. He already stopped counting the amount of friendships he destroyed and hearts he broke. Because if the entire school judges and villainize you from the start, why not giving them what they ask for?

This pairs well with the fact that he is almost impossible to be spotted when standing in the shadows, engulfed in the darkness, Silvio is accustomed to live in. It is almost like he is invisible and decides himself who is allowed to see him and who is not. These two abilities of Laverna have been proven more than handy for tricking other students or teachers, countless of times. And the tendency is still rising

Alongside other minor traits and talents that may prove valuable for a trickster, Laverna granted an irresistible charm on the young student, making his already honeyed words, sound even smoother and trustworthier. This trait was one of the few things that lead Silvio to become one of the more infamous and generally mistrusted students.

Silvios deepest desire is love and acceptance but due to his parents betrayal and general lack of empathy, the jokester has no idea how to achieve this wish and uses his nefarious abilities to gain attention of people that he likes, often making his Chance of friendships even worse.

The pendant which was granted Silvio when he was sorted into the house of the ones chosen by the Matron of Thieves, takes the form of a rather big open lock in various silver tones and adorned with countless jewels across it. Silvio not only wears this sign around his neck, but also has it engraved on his belt buckle. As for his appearance, there always are a few violations of the dress code, that he has to talk his way out, but all in all, his uniform looks like everyone else's. 

While he still wears the long draped robes, he is supposed to wear while being in class, he somehow gets through with having the pieces of cloth magically coloured in a darker and more purplish burgundy than other students alongside with having long sleeves, covering the entire arm. But this is not the only difference to a uncustomized school uniform. Unusually for other students, Silvio's long and fine adorned robes don't end in fancy golden sandals with ornamented straps, the trickster is known for wearing more steadfast and secure brown leather boots around the courtyard. Seeing as he is almost allergic to sunlight, the teachers dont see s problem with that at all.

Thank you very much @kathrynalicemc for this amazing school and this even better challenge. It is my obligation to Tag @upset-hufflepuff because I know you will forget this otherwise. Anyways. Enjoy my Bastard boy, who will steal your kneecaps.

[purplesurveys]

945

A Survey For College/Uni Grads Survey by emptyspaces

What year did you graduate? 2020. It’s only been a little over a month, too.

What degree do you have? Journalism, but I might as well have had a minor in history because of the amount of history electives I took as well haha.

What classes did you take your first year? The first semester of my first year was purely for general courses, so I took basic courses on English, biology, math, philosophy, and Philippine history. By the second semester I took more basic courses on public speaking, physics, and social science, but by then I was already allowed to take two journalism majors.

Second year? My general courses included a basic course on art history, chemistry, English, Filipino, Asian history; my majors were on communication and media, news reporting, media law, media theory, journalism ethics, and an introductory course on broadcast communication.

Third year? The only general courses I had by this point were an intro to political science and a class on Philippine government and politics. I mostly took majors this year though, which wiped me the crap out: my majors were on media and society, feature writing, public relations, international relations, fact-checking, broadcast management, Southeast Asian history, and introductory courses on macroeconomics, film, psychology, and communication research.

Fourth year? I took up journalism design and layout, contemporary Philippine history, Philippine social history, pornography in media just because lol, an introductory course on anthropology, and I also got started on my thesis as well. My second and final semester got cancelled entirely because of the pandemic, but I would have finished units on business reporting, online journalism, community press, and the history of women in the Philippines.

Did it take you longer than four years to graduate? No. That would have disappointed my parents big time and considering how much effort they’ve put to send me to good schools, the least I could do was to graduate on time. Even if I wanted to shift out of my course, it would’ve led to a delay and I didn’t want that for them and I personally didn’t want that for myself either.

Did you start at 18, or did you have a gap year(s) after high school? Again, I didn’t want to take gap years for my parents’ sake. I immediately went to college right after graduating high school, like what the majority of students here do.

Was it a small or large college/university? Very large. The competition is even bigger – 100,000++ high school seniors take the entrance exam every year but they only take in around 10,000 passers. Still, 10,000 new students every school year is so many, and it’s always a bitch to get class slots because of our population.

Public or private? Public. 

Is there anything the school is well-known for? All sorts of things. It’s one of the top schools in the country, so we hog the spotlight in the national news pretty much everyday. I think the biggest things we’re known for though is our reputation for research and our activism history. It also makes us a popular target of pro-government trolls.

What were some of your favorite classes? I loved taking up art studies and all of my political science and history electives, and as for my journalism electives I really only enjoyed public relations and that one class where we ran an online magazine for a whole semester.

What were some classes you hated? Fucking economics. And fact-checking. And the fact that I took both in the same period...got my lowest average for that semester because of those classes, too. I feel like I would have done better if my economics class didn’t have a population of 200 and if I had a more experienced professor fact-checking but shit happens, I guess. I also felt like my porn class was a waste because the readings were so pretentious. And of course, philosophy.

Did you have any super-long classes? Like 3 hours or longer? All majors in my college are 3 hours long. So classes like PR, journalism ethics, feature writing, business reporting, media law, communication theory, etc. all definitely took a big chunk of my weekdays.

Did you ever change your major? No. I had multiple conversations with myself to decide if I should, but aside from not wanting to get delayed I also accepted the fact that as much as I had grown to not like journalism as a practice, the technical skills taught in it were still going to be super useful in the industry I want to get into, which is communications and PR.

Did you do any internships? If so, where? I did. I interned at a PR agency last year but it was part of my requirements to complete my course, so it felt forced to an extent. I’m currently interning at another PR agency, but this time I’m out of school and it’s a personal choice of mine.

Did you ever take any online classes? If so, which ones? I only had one or two online class sessions at the beginning of the lockdown, but my school ultimately cancelled the semester altogether in consideration of disadvantaged students who may not have laptops of their own or wi-fi at home. In the end they just gave a grade of ‘P’ to everyone, which meant Pass.

Were textbooks expensive? I didn’t need to buy entire textbooks because my professors usually just took excerpts or chapters from certain relevant books and let us photocopy the pages, which costs a lot cheaper than having to buy books.

What other supplies besides books did you have to buy for your classes? Other than course readings I didn’t need to spend much. Journalism isn’t a material-heavy course like how film or broadcast communication is.

Were you in any clubs or student organizations? Yes. I was in a journalism org, our graduation committee, and was part of a student publication at one point. I also tried to join AIESEC but my schedule was so hectic at the time that I had to drop it.

Did you ever volunteer anywhere? I was a lecturer and facilitator for the journalism workshops that my org regularly held (and will probably continue to volunteer even as a grad, since I know they appreciate alumni lecturers lol), and one time I also volunteered to be an usher for Batch 2019′s graduation.

Were you on any sports teams? Nope. I liked playing table tennis, but I was never trained properly enough to make it to varsity. 

Where was your favorite place to eat on campus? It depended on how much of a hurry I was in and how much I was willing to spend. The cheapest option was the network of kiosks scattered around campus which sold the same instant noodles and street food. If I wanted to reward myself but was on a tight budget, I went to Area 2 which is a residential street in campus that was also dotted with small food booths ran by the homeowners; if I had some money to spend and the time to stay in a sit-in restaurant I used to go to Chocolate Kiss.

Did you work while you were in college? I did not. I was lucky to be in a privileged position where my parents were able to provide for me and where I never had to worry about finances.

If so, where? How many hours per week?

How many times did you move throughout college? I didn’t. We lived in the same house the whole time I was in college.

Did you live on campus, in an apartment, or somewhere else? I lived at home and I just drove to and from school everyday, since the campus was near-ish enough for me not to avail of a dorm or condo.

Did you live with roommates? Alone? With a significant other? I lived with my family, but tbh it was mostly my mom and brother at home since my sister stays at a dorm and my dad works abroad.

If off-campus, how much was your rent? Never had to pay any.

How often did you go back to visit your parents? I went home to my mom every night lol, unless I had a sleepover at someone else’s place.

Did your parents help you out with living costs? Sure did. Nothing changed with my living arrangements and I still lived under their roof.

Did your parents (or someone else) pay for your tuition? They paid for the first two semesters; then by my sophomore year the government passed an act implementing free tuition for all state universities so since then they never had to pay a cent for my education.

Was it an expensive school? Not at all, which is why the competition to get in is so fierce. To illustrate, four years in my school is just equivalent to one semester in my sister’s college. Last time I checked one unit is ₱1500 or roughly $30.

If you paid for it, do you still have student loans you're paying off? I don’t have student loans. Idk if that’s a thing here, actually. I don’t think it is.

How many people did you date throughout college? One.

What was your longest relationship while in college? The whole four years. I was in the same relationship when I started and ended.

Were you in a sorority/fraternity? Fuck no.

Were you into partying? Just occasionally. I wasn’t a wild partier but I did go to a few college parties every now and then, and I certainly went to nearby bars nearly every Friday.

Where did you and your friends usually hang out? Along Katip, since there were enough places there to hang out in. Occasionally we’d go to Maginhawa, but I prefer it a lot less because the parking there sucks balls.

What did you and your friends do for fun? Drink, eat, play games.

Do you still keep in touch with any college friends? Very much. I support those who remain in the org, and I occasionally catch up with those who had already graduated.

Did any of them graduate with the same degree as you? Most of them did. It’s how I met them.

What did you do after you graduated? I rested for a bit but an existential crisis quickly came over and now I’m in a bit of a mental slump, but at least I’ve scored this internship to keep me occupied.

How was the pay at your first job out of college? The company I’m currently interning for objectively pays well, but they acquired me as an intern because they aren’t offering full-time positions for now. That said, I get an allowance rather than a salary so it isn’t much at all, but I’m still happy to be in the company because it’s supposed to be one of the top agencies in the country.

What classes prepared you the most for your career? PR, feature writing, public speaking, news reporting, online journalism...and tbh org work. 

- Five favorite memories from your college days -

1: UP vs DLSU basketball game from September last year HAAAAAA

2: Attending my organization’s orientation and encountering them for the first time, not knowing I was going to bloom so much there and gain my closest friends

3: High Def 2018 and 2019

4: Drinking at VSpot with Angela, Hans, Gabie, and whoever else from their Ateneo gang that also got invited

5: TK with orgmates

[aparecium-hq]

Welcome to Aparecium, Ro! You have been accepted for Scorpius Malfoy. We are thrilled to have, as you put it, a massive anti-hero, morally-grey character nerd among us! Your Scorpius has a lot of fun potential, and we can’t wait to see what you do with him. Check out the new member checklist, and jump right in.

Character Basics

Birthday (Age): 21 Gender (Pronouns): Male (He/Him) Sexuality: Currently still exploring and unsure. He knows he’s interested in men, but isn’t sure if it’s an exclusive thing and doesn’t feel confident enough for labels just yet. Blood Status: Pureblood Hogwarts House/School: Ravenclaw Occupation: Healer (4th Year Apprenticeship) Faceclaim: Maxence Danet-Fauvel

Any requested changes? Not super explicitly a change exactly but, from the resources I’ve found, there doesn’t appear to be a lot of information on training involved in becoming a Healer. Wiki suggests that it’s all based on academics from regular school years, but I find this a little far fetched. I imagine there’d be some sort of training system in place at the hospital, not that different from the muggle world, so I’ve sort of assumed  a couple of years of what we would call ‘residency’ but I’m calling 'apprenticeship’ because that’s the old school guild way and feels wix-world appropriate? Anyway, let me know if there are any issues with this or if you want to discuss it further! Also, please note that any headcanons I form in the rest of my application regarding existing, playable characters, I can definitely tweak if the personality portrayal goes against future applicants! I make a few references to Albus, for example, that is sort of based on his personality in Cursed Child, as well as what I read in his bio. But if anything conflicts with how he is portrayed by who eventually plays him, I will obviously take that into account and accommodate.

Biography:

Having inadvertently become the best friend of Albus Potter, he never really had the opportunity to complain about the challenges of growing up the son of Draco Malfoy. Because obviously, growing up the son of Harry Potter (and then sorted into Slytherin, no less—cue gasps of shock and appall) was obviously a lot more immediately arduous. And Scorpius is and has always been an empathetic person. Some people (sometimes even his father, when he got cranky) had coined that particular trait as being a bit of a push over, but Scorpius liked that he put the needs and considerations of others before his own.

So he had no regrets about how he more often than not, kept those particular thoughts to himself. But it did get frustrating sometimes, especially as a kid. Because it would seem that no matter how many years of post-war peace go by, they can never fully escape the discrimination (or, as his father likes to sarcastically call it, the 'hurt feelings’).

And it’s not at all that he didn’t have a good childhood. In a lot of ways, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Certainly, there were some… complications. A few particularly difficult years, being that he was a child of divorce, and had to adjust to bouncing back and forth between two separate households at a young age. But overall, he knows he’s one of the lucky ones. He has always felt loved, protected and supported. And though his parents were barely on speaking terms for the better part of the first few years after their divorce, they did their best not to involve Scorpius in their issues of discontent.

Despite all of that, he has always been a lot closer with his father, than his mother. Astoria is good to him and loving, but she was (somewhat surprisingly) less supportive of Scorpius’ straying from tradition when it came to being sorted into Ravenclaw, and his relationships with the Potter-Weasley clan. Draco, despite his persnickety temperament, had been Scorpius’ influence of patience, ambition and most importantly, tolerance. From the conversations they’ve had over the years, Scorpius is beginning to understand that his father still holds a lot of resentment for the expectations that were forced upon him as the only Malfoy heir of his generation, especially with things that went on during the war. To this day, however, it’s a bit like piecing together a jigsaw puzzle because Draco often refuses to discuss the war.

When it comes to politics, Scorpius is by no means opposed to muggleborn equality—obviously—and he can even hypothetically be supportive of the introduction of muggle technology. But he was raised by parents who were absolutely against the absurd idea of abolishing the Statue of Secrecy, and Scorpius has to admit he agrees with them. Even his father, who is generally a lot more empathetic to muggle and muggleborn related politics than Astoria, firmly believes dissolving the Statue of Secrecy would only lead to another war, perhaps even uglier than the last.

A typical Ravenclaw, Scorpius very much enjoyed school, and now that he’s out in the 'real world’, even though he's  had a few years to adjust, he still sometimes feels a little lost in it. He misses the reliable comfort of being a student, of having constant mentors and structure available to him, and the leniency of not having to make and stick to decisions regarding his future. He followed in his fathers footsteps and pursued Healing, which he has to admit feels relatively right, but still, he’s never been as good under fire as his father, nor as unflappably resilient and ambitious. He wants to be good, and he wants to make a difference and make his parents proud—but there are times he really struggles not to crumple under the pressure of it all.

And then there was Rose. Merlin, he has so many regrets about how things went with Rose—his other best friend. He’d known they should probably never have dated. He’d known, and even Albus had tried to warn him, but at the time Scorpius had just dismissed Albus’ concerns as his “annoying cynicism” talking. And to be fair, Albus really could be quite cynical sometimes.

But as it turns out, he was right. He was really, really right, because the (astoundingly brief) relationship had been a total bust, and even though he and Rose had agreed in advance not to let the attempt at romance come between their friendship should it not work out, Scorpius made that promise a difficult one to keep when he cheated on her with a young man in his apprenticeship program at St. Mungo’s, and she found out. He knows it’s his fault, he does—but he misses her intensely and he wants to find a way to win back her trust and respect.

Plus, it’d be great if he could finally get Albus to stop with the 'I told you so’ tirade.

Character Questionnaire

What does your character value in a friendship? Scorpius’ friends mean everything to him. Though he can be something of an introvert (strong Ravenclaw vibes), he is prone to getting lonely without the company of those few people dearest to him. The ones who know him best and with whom he can share anything. He finds he’s frequently looking to his friends for advice, or their perspective on something he’s feeling particularly indecisive or uncertain about, so he definitely values honesty in that regard, and someone he feels safe being open with about his fears. He also values patience, and inquisitiveness, and he has a harder time with people who are hot-tempered or quick to anger. Which… did make his relationship with Albus a complicated one, especially at first, but by the same token, he also really admires people who are passionate and decisive—perhaps because it embodies traits he wishes he could see more of in himself.

How would your character describe their own work ethic? Is that an accurate measure of themself?

If there is one thing Scorpius inherited above all else from his father, it’s his work ethic. Draco taught him to be a resilient, diligent student, and a reliable, focused worker. He taught him to take pride in his work, and to never settle for anythnig less than the best. This did generate some issues with Scorpius’ tendency towards being an obsessive perfectionist, which doesn’t actually bode particularly well for his softer sensibilities and his capricious sense of confidence, but otherwise he considers his work ethic one of his stronger attributes.

How would a stranger who has just met your character describe them?

Probably sweet, warm, and a little shy. Scorpius generally gives off a good first impression because he is well mannered, friendly, and easy going. He much prefers making friends to enemies—but his first impression is usually limited to just that one dimension. Only those who know him better are exposed to his more anxious, self-conscious side, and his friends know he has a bright, almost sarcastic sense of humour that he undoubtedly got from his father. Often, new friends are taken a little by surprise by it.

Para Sample

He knew for a fact that his hair was standing every which way by the time Albus got home, thanks to his some-call-it-habit, others-call-it-tic, of tugging his fingers through it when he was bored. Or nervous. Or tired. Or hungry. And he also knew for a fact that there was a spot on his jumper from the bit of tea he’d spilled on it when he’d gotten home, and that his father would be less than impressed at his state of dress. But though there were a lot of things Scorpius got from his father, one apple that had fallen actually quite far from the tree, had been Draco’s sophisticated propensity.

Scorpius much preferred jumpers that were cozy and a bit too big, shoes that were comfortably worn-in, and rolling out of bed and more or less letting his hair do what it would, without too much fussing about. Sorry, Da.

And tonight, it was admittedly his boredom at fault for the bird’s nest state of his hair, perhaps helped by an undercurrent of anxiety that was pretty common now that Scorpius was getting on into his apprenticeship—and that had undoubtedly gotten worse since his falling out with Rose. And really, he tried not to talk about that whole debacle too much with Albus, because it seemed to make him a little uncomfortable, but Scorpius was prone to over-thinking (read: obsessing) and so it was a subject that was almost constantly simmering at the back of his mind.

Nonetheless, the sound of the door clicking open brought with it an intense wave of relief and excitement for Scorpius, because Albus was home, which meant someone to talk to, someone to distract him from thinking about work (because his father always told him to leave work at the door when he left, if he wanted to have any semblance of a life outside it), and perhaps someone to play a round of Wizard’s Chess with him. Though that usually took a fair amount of convincing, with Albus.

[kisskissbanggang]

Gold Star

[~3K Words -- College!Mark x Tutor!Female Reader -- Fluff, Smut -- Guidance, noona kink, temptation, mutual oral sex]

[Hard and Soft Mark Lee for @ultimate-kpop-trash-scenarios 💕]

Mark drummed his fingers on the table, deep in thought. He'd been stuck on this question for a few minutes already, but you were sure he was going to get it on his own soon enough. You started tutoring Mark last semester, and he was a great student, if not a little easily distracted. Mark sighed in relief and tossed his pen down onto the desk. "Alright," he laughed, "I don't think it's the worst answer, but I think I got it." You smiled and slid his notebook in front of you to review it. He really did have a handle on the material, he was just more abstract in his thinking. Occasionally, you had to get pretty creative to explain concepts to him. You beamed at him, "It's not the worst answer at all. It's actually pretty good! I know we've been struggling with this all week. How about I get you a coffee to celebrate?"

You waited for your drinks together at the student cafe. Mark rocked back and forth on his feet, heel to toe, occasionally darting his gaze at you. As you handed him his iced Americano, he finally got the nerve to say what was on his mind.

"Thank you, by the way," he stammered out.

"What, for the coffee? It's my treat to you. You've been doing so well!"

"No no, I mean, for helping me do so well. My grades have really gotten better since you started tutoring me. My parents won't stop raving about it."

You smiled modestly. It was true, but you knew most of it was just work ethic. He was just a freshman; knowing him, he would've figured it out soon enough. He always did.

He bit his lip, wanting to add something. You sipped your drink, silently nodding encouragement to him.

"I... I look up to you, you know. I feel so comfortable with you by now, and I really respect you." He laughed and struggled to keep eye contact, truly bashful at his admission. It was touching, actually. You'd really grown to like him as well.

"Meaning," he continued, "that I was hoping I could get some dating advice from you. You're so smart, I know you go out, and my friends are all idiots about this stuff. I'd really appreciate it."

You gagged on your drink, fighting to not spit it up. Mark was so handsome and sweet that you had just assumed his personal life was full of dates and flirting. Was he more innocent than you thought?

It was odd to think of Mark this way. If anything, he'd become a good friend over the past months, or even acted as a younger brother of sorts. However, with his simple request he suddenly became... Attractive? Could it have been his apparent naivety? It was an odd sensation. You decided to explore this. You know, for the sake of knowledge.

"Alright," you said, "why not? Just this once, today only, and for God's sake not in public. I don't want everyone suddenly thinking I'm a romance tutor or something." Mark eagerly nodded, practically pulling you across campus to your dorm so you could talk privately. You'd studied here before, so he was already familiar with your cozy and private space. Mark sat himself at your desk, across from where you sat on your bed.

"So," you began, taking the plunge, "what seems to be the problem?"

"Everything? I actually don't have a lot of experience. Not with college girls, at least."

"I suppose that's as good a place to start as any. Are you looking for a relationship? Just sex? Just dating?"

"A relationship would be nice. I've never had anything serious before. I think some dating would be a good way to get there. As for sex..." Mark chewed on his lip and stared at his fidgeting hands in his lap. You could see he was dying of embarrassment. You decided to comfort him. It'd be the only way to help him get over it. You slid off the bed and pulled up your footstool next to where he sat. You put a comforting hand on his. "Mark," you pressed gently, "are you a virgin?" He nervously laughed and nodded, obviously self-conscious. You rubbed the back of his hand, "Hey, that's okay. You know that. Do you think it would help you any if you weren't?"

"I dunno, I just think I'd feel more confident if I knew what I was doing, you know? I feel like every girl I talk to knows."

"I didn't know."

"Thanks, noona--" he stopped himself, mortified. He'd never addressed you as noona before. Your relationship had been so professional until now. You really felt for the guy. You put a reassuring hand to his cheek before quickly moving it to his shoulder. "Hey," you comforted, "it's alright. It's so sweet and awesome that you feel comfortable with me. I want to be able to help."

He nodded, his face still flushed with embarrassment. He clearly had something else on his mind. You let him figure out his next move on his own. He turned to you.

"Noona," he tried again, "I think if I knew what I was doing I'd feel way more confident. I'm not even sure I'm that good at kissing. Can you tell me what you look for in a date when it comes to that?"

You considered what was at stake here. Mark trusted you enough to ask. He clearly wanted advice from you. You cleared your throat. "Well," you began, "I guess it depends on the moment. On a first or second date I'll be looking for something modest. Like he's not too eager, you know? And as we move on, maybe something a little more bold."

He clearly looked like he was trying to get what you were saying. After all, you remembered, sometimes you did have to get creative. But did you really want to suggest what you were thinking?

Turns out, you wouldn't have to.

"This is going to sound so stupid, and feel free to say no, and feel free to kick me out, but can you show me what you mean?"

You panicked, fidgeting with the zip on your jacket. He was so cute in this moment, so innocent. Was this a thing you were into? You'd never realized before. What if this was too awkward? You didn't want to think about the consequences. You decided to take a chance anyhow.

You got up and saw the disappointment on his face. He was sure you were about to throw him out. Instead, you sat back on your bed and patted an open spot next to you, beckoning him to come join you. He raised his eyebrows in interest and sat by you.

"Alright," you said, nicely but firmly, "just this once, today, and for God's sake we don't tell anyone." Mark nodded eagerly. You adjusted your jacket for, you realized, no reason. Maybe you just wanted to look more put-together and professional as always. You turned to face him, and he did the same.

"So," you smirked, "to review: I personally look for something simple in a first or second date kiss." He closed his eyes expectantly. You still couldn't believe you were about to do this. You leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. It only lasted a moment before you pulled away. He immediately opened his eyes, looking for what came next. "After that, then I'm looking for something more complex." He nodded, wanting you to demonstrate.

He closed his eyes again and you leaned forward, starting softly again at first, but soon you find yourself feeling more comfortable. You pressed a few more deep kisses to his lips before moving on. Carefully, you parted his lips with your tongue. This must all be review for him so far, you thought, as he seemed to know his way around this pretty well. You wanted to make sure he knew he could learn from you. You wrapped your arms around his neck and he responded right away, wrapping his arms your waist. You weren't sure quite when it happened, but at some point you swiveled and threw a leg over his lap, pulling yourself up to straddle him. This got your first groan out of him.

He blushed deeply. "Sorry," he said, "it feels like forever since I did this. Actually, all I've ever done is make out, but I never felt like I was any good at it." You shook your head.

"You seem to have a good idea of it. You just need to be more forward. Everything intimate is about giving and taking, after all." You pointed to a spot on your neck. "Kiss me here." He nodded and brushed your hair back over your shoulder. You shivered at his breath on your neck just before he pressed his lips to the skin. You let out a soft moan -- it'd been a while for you as well. He seemed to like it. You felt him stiffen more below you, and soon he was peppering your neck with kisses, his hands wandering and finding your breasts. All you could do was moan. It was almost too much. You felt yourself get dizzy with arousal, and you knew you needed more.

You ran your fingers through his hair and gently pulled him off your neck. He looked up at you expectantly. Wordlessly this time, you guided his hands to the zip on your jacket. You helped him get the jacket off, leaving with one less layer. You took his hands again, and this time guided him to slip off your shirt. He actually gulped and you fought hard and succeeded to not giggle at how cute he was. You released his hands, letting him watch as you unclasped your bra and dropped it to the floor. He watched excitedly as you softly ran your hands down to caress your own breasts. "Kiss me here, too," you whispered. He nodded and instantly took your breasts in his own hands, leaving forward to nuzzle and kiss them. He experimented with sucking and playing with your nipples, groaning when he got you to squeal. You were losing track of time. Eventually, he pulled back, delirious. This time, you leaned down to kiss his slender neck, playfully biting him. "Noona," he moaned, "what now? I want to learn how to make you feel good." The thought made you smile wickedly at him. He'd certainly learn all he was willing to today.

You swung your leg back off of him so you were now seated beside him again. You laid back to rest on your elbows. "Take off my pants," you instructed. He nodded, making quick work of slipping off your jeans. He took in the sight of you sitting in front of him in your panties. "Now," you said, "touch me."

"How?"

"Come here and I'll show you."

He climbed back on the bed and you guided his hand to slowly, softly trail down your stomach to press against your pussy. His touch made you shiver. "You're so wet," he marveled.

"You did that," you praised, "you're doing so well." He loved that. He pressed another eager kiss to your lips as you guided his hand to rub you over your panties. When you were sure you'd had enough for now, you figured you wanted a break from teaching. You pulled him off of you and he patiently waited to see what you'd do next.

"What's most important," you said, "is switching things up when you're fooling around like this. You don't want to just be doing the same thing forever."

"So what now?"

"So now I'm going to show you something else." You softly dropped to your knees in front of him, looking for his approval as you unzipped his jeans. You would stop the moment he thought you went fast enough, but that thought must have never occurred to him. You pulled his hard cock from his boxers, surprised at his size. You gently pumped him in your hands and he groaned. Mark leaned back on his elbows and watched you as leaned further down. You placed a soft kiss to the tip before licking a stripe up his whole length. He shivered and gripped the bedsheets. You weren't a stranger to blowjobs, and you figured you should show him everything good about them. It might as well come first from someone he trusts. He was a good size that you could get a fair amount down your throat, but you didn't start there right away. With your lips around him, massaging him with your tongue as you bobbed up and down, he let out a full moan. He cursed under his breath and sat up. You pulled away, interested in what he had to say.

"Noona," he panted, "I meant to ask you earlier. What do you think of dirty talk?"

You patted his thigh and made sure to casually stroke him so he wouldn't get soft. "Well, I'm not huge on porn levels of dirty talk. I don't know if a lot of people are. Just don't force it. Tell me what comes naturally to you."

"And what should I do with my hands? I just want to, I dunno, grab you. It's weird to explain. Is that okay?"

"It's definitely okay! Here," you grabbed his hand and gently put it to the back of your head, "I like when guys stroke my hair. Don't push me down unless the moment calls for it or whoever you're with is into it. Or you could touch my breasts, or gently pull my hair. Yeah?"

He smiled, "Yeah."

"Good," you replied before slipping him back into your mouth. This time you sank down to take as much as you could, his head dipping into your throat and causing you to gag. You moaned, loving the feeling when you were controlling it. Mark cursed under his breath again, and you felt him clutch a fistful of your hair.

Before too long, Mark gently pulled you off. "Noona," he wheezed, almost entirely out of breath, "I don't want to cum yet. I want to make you feel good first. Show me how, please?"

You bit your lip and thought. You'd been rubbing and fingering yourself almost the whole time you'd been sucking him, so it wouldn't even take that long with proper guidance and you were, after all, a perfectly capable tutor. You nodded. "First," you said, "we switch places." You got up to sit on the edge of the bed while Mark slid down. He pulled his shirt up over his head, wanting to reach some similar level of nudity to you. You admired his toned chest, but didn't let yourself get distracted. You considered doing most of the work yourself, but then how would he learn?

"Take off my panties," you instructed. He looked almost nervous. He reached for you, gently pulling the soft fabric down. He admired your pussy, possibly the first he'd seen in person. The thought nearly made you feel guilty, but you remembered that he chose you. This felt special. Your panties joined the rest of the clothes on the floor.

You spread your legs and rubbed yourself a little for his benefit before moving on. He was almost hypnotized. You beckoned him closer. "Kiss me here," you said softly, placing a hand on the back of his head to lead him even closer.

Mark was surprisingly adept at oral sex. He easily picked up on what made you react and when he should back off. You could get lost in the moment with how he licked you. He was so attentive and eager to please, traits you'd never really had the pleasure of experiencing until now. He loved it when you told him he was doing well. You begged him to put his fingers inside you, that it would really help put you over the edge. He jumped at the chance, slipping his slender fingers into you and gently pumping. He seemed to have more experience with this. It wasn't long before you pulled his hair, arching your back as you came on his tongue. You rode it out before sitting up and pulling his face to yours, reaching to grab your shirt off the floor and wiping his face clean and pressing a sweet kiss to his forehead.

"Do you want one last lesson for today?" You whispered against his forehead, kissing him again. He nodded. You pulled him up to sit with you on the bed. You reached into your bedside table and pulled out a condom. You showed him the best way to know you rolled it on the right way every time, and laid him back on your bed. You climbed on top of him, teasing the slick entrance of your pussy against the tip of his cock. You heard him stop breathing for just a second. ��Good?” You asked breathlessly. He nodded, his hands tentatively traveling to your hips, encouraging you. You sank down, taking him whole. You rode him steadily, both of your quiet moans the only noise filling the room. You knew he’d been touching himself while he’d been servicing you, so he probably wouldn’t last long on this first venture. 

His hands grabbed at anything he could -- your thighs, your ass, the bedsheets. He pulled you down to groan in your ear as he kissed your neck. “Noona,” he moaned, “can I cum now?”

“Yes,” you moaned in return, “please cum. It’s going to feel so good.”

You held each other tightly as he came, moaning and cursing as he thrust up into you. You fell down to his side in bed, careful to not let him slide out of you just yet. You pulled him close, stroking his hair as he came down. He held you, his head resting on your chest. “Thank you, Noona,” he breathed, “I knew you’d help.” You laughed and pressed another kiss to his forehead, “And I knew you’d get it just as fast as ever.” You stayed like that for the afternoon, wondering if you’d repeat this encounter soon.

[romchomp]

Gilmore Girls: The Love Interests

This post might get a little lengthy.

In Gilmore Girls, there are four girls we get to see coarse through different relationships throughout the seasons of the show. As someone who recently finished marathoning Gilmore Girls and has a blog based on romance shows and anime, I figured why not talk about all these relationships the characters went through.

Rory, as our main character, will go first. Talking about the different boyfriends she’s had will be fun because her taste is uhhh pretty questionable.

Dean is Rory’s first boyfriend and hence, the first love interest. I think we can all agree he was the worst. He actually started off pretty good, if not a little boring. However, it doesn’t take that long for him come off as dramatic with some sort of anger issue. He almost always put his feelings before Rory’s. When his marriage fell apart he got upset with Rory and made it out to be as if everything was her fault despite him being the one who cheated. He generally became less and less pleasant as the show went on and even at his best he was just generic and boring and while nice, still not that good of a boyfriend.

The next boy Rory dates is Jess. Jess is a tricky one to talk to about because while I love his character and find him to be one of the more interesting ones in the series, I really don’t like him as a boyfriend. All throughout their relationship Jess treated Rory horribly. He was moody, never talked to her about anything, and never even seemed like he actually wanted to be in the relationship. They were constantly arguing and most of the sweet moments between them were Jess’s attempt to make up for some shitty thing he did earlier. I liked him a lot more when he wasn’t dating Rory. Season 6 Jess was great, and maybe if the show took the route of Rory dating him once again things would be different and I could say I liked him better the second go around but that’s not what happened. Bottom line is, he’s a better character than Dean, also probably had more respect for Rory and I’d say he understood Rory better than Logan did too, but god he was a really bad boyfriend.

Last but not least, there’s Logan. Who has the opposite problem Jess did. Despite him being a complete douchebag and a personality I found to be quite unlikable, he was a surprisingly pretty decent boyfriend. My opinion of Logan moved around quite a bit through the course of the show. At first, I hated him. The way he teased Marty and talked to Rory immediately put a sour taste in my mouth. However after Dean broke up with Rory (for the third time?) at her grandparents' party I realized that huh, I like the way he’s treating Rory. The way he tried to cheer her up felt very platonic. Was he already pining for her? Probably. But Logan never came across as more than friendly until he started very obviously teasing her when she was showing that one Chilton student around. Then there’s when Rory asked him why he never asked her out (because it was pretty evident they both liked each other at this point), and Logan’s reasoning was that he didn’t know how to be a boyfriend. By this point I like Logan. He respects Rory and wants her around even if only platonically because she’s special to him. However, cracks start to show. Rory changes a lot over the period of dating Logan. She changes a lot of things that were always a big part of her character like...not cooking and not exercising. Okay while those things were small, these changes in Rory made it a lot easier to realize that Rory and Logan don’t have a lot in common. They don’t even have common interests, not really. This made me start backtracking how much I actually like Logan and before I noticed Rory changing, I would’ve told you I think he made a better boyfriend than Jess. However, if there is one thing Jess has over Dean and Logan, it’s that he understands Rory better. Rory and Jess also just kind of clicked more. Rory and Logan followed the basic steps of being a good couple, but there wasn’t much that kept me wanting them to stay together or even like them together. They were just...there.

Lane

The only love interests you really need to remember for Lane would be Dave and her eventual endgame, Zach ( Zack? The internet can’t seem to make up its mind).  From my knowledge, the actor who played Dave ended up taking a role in another show thus bailing on Gilmore Girls. Which would explain the very weak “he got a scholarship in California” reasoning for why his character was suddenly disappeared. A lot of people seemed to like Dave more than Zach and I was certainly on that boat for a while myself but I gotta say, I started finding Lane and Zach a really fun couple to watch once Lane got pregnant. I really liked the scene where they bonded over not wanting to have the baby (in a mostly comedic fashion) and it was around that point it became clearer how much the two actually have in common. Somehow the two became more compatible after having twins. Go figure.

Paris

On to Paris...can we just forget that Tristan and Fleming ever happened? Joking, joking (mostly). Paris and Tristan never dated (thank god) and therefore were never love interests, but Paris’s hard to believe crush on him was enough to be sigh-worthy. There was That College Guy She Dated During Chilton That I Can’t Remember the Name Of who didn’t really do anything noteworthy. Then there’s...eighty years old Asher Fleming. Look, I could go on about how Fleming was way too old for Paris and how problematic their age gap is, but it’s 2019 now and I’m sure every Gilmore Girls fan has both, ranted about and heard ranting of it so I’ll move on. If there is one good thing I can say about Fleming, he gives us more of an idea of what Paris cares about when considering a romantic partner: intelligence. That’s about it, which also means she doesn’t really care if her relationship would otherwise be seen as weird. She probably wouldn’t even care if the person themself was deemed weird either. Which leads me to Doyle, in my opinion, the best boyfriend out of any of the boyfriends in the series. I love Doyle. He’s strange but charming, squeamish but also capable of being a leader, and genuinely cares for Paris. While it took a few tries, in the end, Paris found someone she made a perfectly odd pairing with. I mean hey, that’s how life usually works out I guess.

Lorelai

Now we get to Lorelai, who I think had the more interesting love interests. Despite that, I won’t be getting into Max and Jason because frankly, I don’t think anyone really cares about them that much. By around halfway through the show, it becomes increasingly obvious that the only two true possible endgames for Lorelai would be Luke or Christopher.

There’s a bit of a parallel between Luke and Christopher in the sense of how big of opposites they are. Where Christopher comes and goes throughout the show, always leaving an impact after leaving; Luke is a constant throughout the show, with some major moments but often just peacefully going along with the plot. While Chris is impulsive and rushes into things, Luke over thinks himself out of things. Lorelai’s parents hate Luke but they’ve always loved Chris. Christopher is immature while Luke is arguably the most mature character in Gilmore Girls.

I was impressed when I noticed just how lined up their differences were. I wasn’t something I expected from Gilmore Girls in all honesty.

I think most of us can agree that Luke was better for Lorelai. They balance each other out a lot better than Lorelai and Chris ever could. Luke and Lorelai’s differences were also manageable so long as they had good communication. Which they didn’t while they were dating and is why they ultimately broke up in season 6. Which brings me to another parallel: the marriages. Luke and Lorelai broke up because of postponing their wedding. Chris and Lorelai on the other hand, broke up because they had rushed into getting married. I could go on and say how Chris proposed to Lorelai in Paris, the city of love, while Lorelai proposed to Luke in his diner as well. The comparisons are all over the place.

The reasoning the show gives for Lorelai and Chris not working out is because “the timing was never right”  which I personally find to be bullshit. They were always too much alike to work out. I want to say I always expected and knew Luke would be who Lorelai ended up with but I’ll be honest, season 7 gave me a good scare. I still think their ending together was weak though.

If I had to rank who had the best love interests it would probably go:

Lorelai (she had the most common sense)

Lane (went from a nice, but slightly boring bf to an asshole who became surprisingly decent once they had kids)

Paris (two duds and a real winner)

Rory (her taste was very questionable)

You know, that is considering the canon love interests.

Rory had three boyfriends, but what if there was another possible love interest in between the lines? Someone who has been by her side the whole time.

Well.

Then there’s Paris.

Paris...Again

Paris who had big, definitive goals for herself just like Rory. Who was hardworking and had a strong work ethic that Rory (arguably) had as well. Paris also has the qualities I liked the best in Jess. Paris could understand Rory’s studiousness and later on her personality in general. This also works vice versa. Pretty much every character has a hard time understanding Paris or simply downright disliking her but Rory always had a decent understanding of her even if the reasoning was something like “Oh, she’s just being Paris.”. She also makes up for my biggest problem with Jess, being moody and never communicating with Rory. Paris, on the other hand, is always quick to tell Rory exactly what she’s feeling and why.

Granted, Rory and Paris were never written to be love interests and even their friendship had some blemishes. I think the potential for Gellmore becoming a likable couple was at its highest in season three and four and slowly diminished as the show went on. In the end, Rory and Paris is a good concept that sadly works best in fanon.

Their relationship in canon was for the most part one-sided. Rory never seemed to want or need or even consider Paris’s help. I also don’t think the show drew out how the two have many similarities as well many differences (you know, the whole “you two have more in common than you might expect” schtick). I know it’s already in the show, but I would’ve liked to see them build on it more.

However, even though they would still have issues in canon, I think Paris could’ve been an improvement or just an interesting addition to the canon love interests even if she didn’t end up as endgame or had a short-lived relationship with Rory. But hey, what are you gonna do when a show was made in the earlier 2000′s.

All in all the love interests in Gilmore Girls were...okay. For the most part. Even the ones I liked had some baffling moments that I could rant about. The romantic relationships were never the part of Gilmore Girls that I think people enjoyed though. We watched for the familial relationships and dynamics that gave the show its charm.

[bedbellyandbeyond]

Breakfast in Bed

(Story Post)

A week into his wolf cycle again, Nathan was finding himself worrying more and more about his upcoming bed rest. He wasn't sure if the nursery was 100% ready, he felt like he needed to be planning more for the big day, and he was worried about the garden at the cabin wilting while it was unattended. It would wilt anyway since it was now early November, but Kent had left clear instructions on how to prep it for the winter but Nathan wasn't home to do it. He'd convinced Nari to go take a look at it sometimes but he only agreed to do so at night on weekends. One such weekend morning, Nathan was sleeping out his exhaustion from the week and missed breakfast service. He didn't mind, he knew he could go crazy at lunch so he was surprised when someone came knocking on his APID door. When he opened it, Pierce was there with a plate and a smile. “Morning!” Pierce said. “I hope I didn't wake you up.”

“No, I just got up and I was doing a bit of reading…” Nathan said. “What's up?” “Well, um, I volunteered to serve breakfast this morning, but when I didn't see you at breakfast, I figured you might still want it and I brought some for you,” Pierce said holding up the plate of pancakes and sausage. “Being a werewolf must drain a lot of energy and I remembered you ate a lot of meat when we first saw each other here, and, I'm sorry, I'm rambling…” “Don't worry about it,” Nathan said opening the door more. “Thanks for the food… I really am pretty hungry. Do you want to come in?” “Uh, if that's alright,” Pierce said stepping in and handing over the plate. “So you live here on nights when you turn into a werewolf, is that correct?” “Yeah, the cycle started about a week ago…” Nathan rubbed the back of his neck. “At the end of the cycle though, I'll be here anyway on bed rest…” “Oh, really? That seems a little soon,” Pierce said. “Is something wrong?” “Yeah. I'm pregnant,” Nathan half joked. “But, seriously, just the fact that I have a womb but no vagina makes it a very high risk pregnancy.” “Wow. That's um… That's a lot of information,” Pierce said blushing. “So then, I'm sure you'd like to spend the rest of your morning resting then?” “Well, I wanted to use the day to write out my usual schedule with the students for the substitute…” Nathan said going over to the bed. “Actually, while you're here, could you grab my laptop from my bag over there? I'm not great at bending over anymore…” “Oh, sure!” Pierce grabbed Nathan's bag off the floor, brought it over and took out the laptop. “I'm, um… I'm actually going to be taking over your class for the year.” “You? Really? But who will be vice principal?” Nathan asked. “Well, I'll still be VP but Ms. Liu will be absorbing some of my afternoon duties,” Pierce said. “We're a team. We'll make it work.” Nathan blanched. “You weren't able to find anyone else? Are you sure this will work?” Pierce put up his hands. “Nathan, calm down. It's going to be just fine. We have it covered. In fact, I'm not used to being a VP. It'll be refreshing to be back in the classroom again.” Nathan rubbed his head. “Jesus, Pierce… Why do you work so hard? Just thinking about you being a VP and a teacher and volunteering here… I'd go into cardiac arrest.” Pierce chuckled. “But I love it. And if you love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life.” “As nice as that sounds, it's still work and a man can only work so hard before…expiring,” Nathan stated. “If anyone needs to rest, it sounds like it should be you.” “Naw… Don't worry about it,” Pierce said. “I take breaks… Like visiting you today.” Nathan raised an eyebrow. “You're serving me food and you're still in your apron.” “But I'm supposed to be doing dishes,” Pierce said. “So it is a break.” “Uh huh…” Nathan started eating some pancakes. “These are pretty good…” “Yeah, the chefs really don't skimp on quality,” Pierce said. “They say the chef has like super taste buds so he can tell if there's even the slightest thing off with the food. Sometimes though he takes too long trying to perfect the recipes.” Nathan chuckled in response and ate a bit more. “…I guess it's better you cover my class than a stranger since you already know the kids.” Pierce nodded. “I already know the routine and whose got allergies and which kids can't sit together.” Nathan smiled. “I'm going to miss the kids… I've never been with a more special group. All those kids know what it's like to be different and they work so well together because they're just so keen to learn about each other.” “What better staff to teach them than a bunch of people doing the exact same thing?” Pierce pointed out. “I love the group we have. I feel like most of us can consider each other friends. I've never been on a faculty so ready to have each other's back.” “That's true… Nari, Dax and you have been the most help to me. I feel like I can trust you guys… Frankly when I first was contacted by APID I thought it was a joke,” Nathan said chuckling. He had to hold his side though as laughter jostled his stomach too much. “And then when I saw my first alien, I believed them but then I was still very distrustful… It took me a while to warm up to my case workers but it's the people that really make you feel at home.” “Yeah, I get that… I mean, I remember when my mother told me I'd be summering at a facility in Canada,” Pierce said. “I was so scared and it was the first time I'd ever been away from her for so long. But they made me feel at home here so I can't appreciate it more.” Nathan smiled and looked down at the plate of pancakes. “Well, I shouldn't keep you from your duties. I'll bring back the plate when I'm done.” “Well, I mean my shift's pretty much over, so I can wait… That way you don't have to go the way,” Pierce offered. “Do you want to watch a movie with me then?” Nathan asked. Pierce blinked. “Really? Sure. I'd love to.” Nathan patted the bed beside him and pulled up Netflix on his laptop and picked a film. Pierce sat down and slid up against the back of the bed. He sat quietly most of the movie, so Nathan figured he was pretty focused on the plot so he didn’t bother him while he finished his plate. With so much sitting however, it wasn't long before the twins started rolling about and he felt queasy. He rubbed his stomach gently trying to calm them down but it only seemed to excite them more. “Are they… Are they moving?” Pierce asked. “Yeah..” Nathan groaned. “I’m supposed to like it I think but at the same time, they just make me feel sick… The doc says it’s because one is pushed up against my actual stomach so when they move, it literally upsets my stomach…” “Oh, that really sucks…” Pierce said. “Does anything help to settle them?” “Yeah, walking around and stuff but I need sit down solutions…” Nathan said. “I just try rubbing which sometimes works, sometimes makes it worse, like now…” “Well, could I try?” Pierce asked. “I want to help.” “Uh, sure…” Nathan slipped up his shirt, exposing his belly. He motioned over his stomach. “One’s lying like this… The other’s underneath them right now. At least, I think that’s how it feels… Last appointment, this was their general position.” “Okay…” Pierce reached out a hand and lightly placed it on Nathan’s stomach. He started moving it around, but he didn’t really keep the pressure even. Nathan started giggling a bit. “Pierce… Oh my god, that tickles… That’s…not helping…” Pierce pulled his hand away. “Ah! I’m sorry!” “You’re nervous,” Nathan said. “Why are you nervous? You’ve touched my stomach before.” “Yeah, but it wasn’t moving before,” Pierce said. “I just…it’s strange on my hand when it moves…” “Wow. You baby…” Nathan took Pierce’s hand and placed it right where he was feeling the most movement. “Do you feel that?” Pierce held his breath as he felt something inside press against his hand. “That’s crazy… That’s inside you.” “Yeah, it's wild,” Nathan said. He looked at Pierce and squinted a bit. “I've been curious for a bit… How old are you?” “Me? Twenty-nine.” “Oh. Okay, I was starting to wonder if you were younger than me,” Nathan said. “But you're still pretty young for a VP.” “Yeah, I feel that,” Pierce said. “It makes it harder for parents to take me seriously I think… But I do my best.” He took his hand away. “How old are you?” “Twenty-seven,” Nathan said. “So in adult terms, we're about the same age.” “Yeah, that's cool. How old did you think I was?” Pierce asked. “Honestly, I don't know,” Nathan said. “Because it didn’t feel like you could be younger than me because of the VP thing, but then you sort of act a bit younger than the rest of us… Not like in maturity, but you get more excited about things than anyone else I'd say.” “What's not to be excited about?” Pierce asked. “With the people we work with, and the kids, every day holds new surprises and I can't wait.” “Well… I admire your positivity…” Nathan said. “But for me, I think I'm just a little more scared of what's going to happen next.” “Well… Maybe, you could use an extra hand,” Pierce said, his own hand sliding onto Nathan’s shoulder. “It’s just not easy to do these things alone.” “Yeah… The doc thinks I should try dating,” Nathan sighed. “But I just… I feel like my emotions are really…complicated with all these hormones. Not to mention, he also told me that being a werewolf gives off these pheromones that, like, makes people attracted to me, so I'd hate to think that someone only likes me just because I'm a werewolf. And I don't feel attractive right now…” “Well… I mean you are attractive,” Pierce stated. “…I, uh… Well, I just feel like people are smarter than pheromones. Like sure, it maybe makes them a little more attracted to you, but then they still have the ability to think about what they actually like about you, like your smile and your work ethic and your tenacity…” Nathan huffed. “Thanks, but, if I'm to believe the father of these kids, it was pure pheromones that got me pregnant because we absolutely hated each other.” “Really?” Pierce blinked. “So did he leave you alone like this?” Nathan waggled his head back and forth. “In a way… He's dead.” “Dead?” Pierce inhaled. “What happened?” “Capital punishment happened.” “Here?!” “Texas,” Nathan sighed. “Jesus… So like…do you like bad boys or something?” Pierce asked. “No. I told you we hated each other,” Nathan said. “But he's also like a were-person as well, and according to him, I was in heat and he couldn't control his bear with those kinds of pheromones about so I'm supposed to believe him… I don't know, it seems stupid to me. I shouldn't even be telling my VP this… God, I'm so stupid.” “No, it's okay,” Pierce said. “I don't think you're stupid. Things happen and sometimes we don't have control over it. You're a nice guy and anyone would be lucky to be with you.” Nathan smiled and rested his head on Pierce's shoulder. “Geez, you're so positive. How are you single?” “Aha, I'm not all that…” Pierce said. “No one would ever want me…” “What? Why would you think that?” Nathan asked. “Well, I mean look at me,” Pierce said. “They'd probably be scared I'd bite them or something…” “So… You've never been with anyone?” Nathan asked. “Ever?” Pierce shook his head. “…No. Never.” “So you've never…” “I haven't even kissed another person before.” “Pierce… I mean, I'm surprised, but I hope you don't think you don't deserve it,” Nathan said. Pierce was silent. “Oh, no. Come on,” Nathan said, sitting up straight again. “You have so much to offer. You're handsome, fun, very hard working, and basically the nicest person. If you're really worried about your teeth, trust me, there are people who are into that.” Pierce blushed and rubbed his neck. “Thanks, Nathan… I mean, it's not really just my teeth… I don't think I let myself get close to people because…I don't know, I'm worried I won't be able to…perform like I should.” “Why's that?” Nathan asked. “Well, um… It's complicated,” Pierce explained. “I just…don't think I want sex as much as normal people… It kind of scares me and I just feel like whoever I date will have desires I can't keep up with.” “What if you date someone like you?” Nathan offered. “There are other people who feel the same way.” “But, at the same time, I just don’t know what I like yet,” Pierce said. “Because I haven't tried it yet…” “That's true,” Nathan said. “But it sounds like you won't be happy unless you find an emotional connection with someone first. So look for that. Worry about the sex stuff later. Someone who really loves you will understand.” “Yeah… I suppose you're right,” Pierce said. “I just need the right person.” “Same,” Nathan sighed. “But right now, I feel like I can only concentrate on baking these buns to completion.” He rubbed his stomach caringly. “What a mess they're coming into… But I'm doing my best.” “Yeah, you are. Keep it up.” Pierce picked up Nathan's plate. “So, uh, I'm gonna run this back. I have to start prepping for lunch.” “Alright,” Nathan nodded. “Thank you for that again. Very good breakfast. I haven't had someone bring me breakfast in bed in a long time.” “Well, you deserve it,” Pierce said heading to the door. “See you.” “Bye.”

[gimmeyoon]

Updated: 12/16/19

Key: 

✶ brain blast: I am going to write this fic

✶ plotting: I’m writing an outline of this fic and developing the plot

✶ writing: I’m in the process of actually writing this fic

✶ editing: I’m fixing this fic and getting ready to post it

Coming Soon to GimmeYoon

✶ Fifteen Sunflowers | Taehyung

   ✦ College AU: Part of the Weather Series

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝There’s nothing you hate more than professors assigning partners for group work. So of course your art professor did exactly that, and she matched you with the hottest human being you have ever seen. Fan-freaking-tastic.❞

   ✦ status: plotting

✶ Picture Perfect | Seokjin

   ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by the Picture of Dorian Gray

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝Look, Seokjin knows it weird that his parents had a portrait commissioned of him for his high school graduation. And yes, he also thinks it’s weird that the painting somehow looks likes its aging with him. He doesn’t need you to bring it up. He certainly doesn’t need the girl in his Chemistry class to know about it, but that certainly didn’t stop Jimin from telling her.❞

   ✦ status: brain blast  

✶ Bloom | Jimin

   ✦ College AU: Part of the Weather Series

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝There were few things you remembered about the spring concert, and none of them were making out with Park Jimin❞

   ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Before the Fall | Yoongi

   ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by Pride and Prejudice

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝Firstly, Yoongi would like it to be known that it’s his parents who are rich not him. Secondly, yes he is friends with Park Jimin but that certainly does not, and he cannot emphasize this enough, make him rich. Thirdly, even if he was rich that in no way influenced his making it into this school. He’s a music prodigy, god damnit, and if anyone has any questions they can ask Park Jimin because Yoongi is in the music room practicing and has no plans to leave.❞

   ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Green Light | Hoseok

   ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by the Great Gatsby

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝Hoseok is sure of two things: going on that break was the worst decision of his college experience and posting snapchats to prove that he is doing much better is the only way to stay afloat. He may or may not have saw on instagram that her cousin is a Freshmen, and he may or may not be the reason Beta Tau Sigma is committed to throwing the best parties this campus has seen every weekend. Now he just has to wait for this theoretical cousin to find her way to the house. Do it for the Snap.❞

   ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Snow One Like You | Seokjin

  ✦ College AU: Part of the Weather Series

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝All you want for Christmas is for your best friend to realize he’s in love with you❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Cold Hands | Yoongi

  ✦ College AU: Part of the Weather Series

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝you do not, in fact, have time to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ. Thankfully some edge lord took pity on you and saved you from the guy who’s always giving out bibles on the quad❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Lost Boy | Taehyung

  ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by Peter Pan and Wendy

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝Taehyung’s life motto is that getting older doesn’t mean growing up. Every day can be an adventure if you let yourself remember how great it was to be a kid. He remembered that you liked that about him, you really did, so why are you so mad?❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Nobody | Jungkook

  ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by the Odyssey

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝Jungkook just happened to score the winning goal in the national championship game, it’s no big deal. Just another day for the golden boy. Now he’s excited to make his way back to campus and get that kiss you promised him if he won. Only problem is the world seems to be against him now.❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Fire and Ice | Jimin

  ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by Jane Eyre

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

  ❝Jimin doesn’t expect people to understand that he both regrets getting his high school girlfriend pregnant and loves his daughter with all of his heart. It worked out fine, Jimin and his daughter live off campus with his parents, so he can still go to college and get his degree. Everything was going just fine, thank you, until he met his match, and now Jimin’s not sure how much longer he can keep wearing his mask.❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Natural History | Namjoon

  ✦ That’s Classic Series: Inspired by the Catcher in the Rye

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝Listen, Namjoon’s not exactly sure what to do now that he has been kicked out of Beta Tau Sigma, and he is particularly not sure how he’s going to break the news to the proud alum, otherwise known as his father. He figures he might as well ask everyone he comes into contact with along the way what they would do in his situation. Not that any is helpful, adults are sort of all phonies at the end of the day. That’s nothing his favorite wing of the Natural History museum can’t attempt to fix. Now someone tell this blue-haired girl to leave him alone.❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Yin and Yang | Taehyung

   ✦ Superhuman au

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝They made one darkness and the other light. They made one the bringer of death and the other the giver of life. They made them powerful, but they locked them in cages. Powerful things do not like to be locked in cages.❞

   ✦ status: writing

✶ Gemini Feed | Yoongi and Namjoon

  ✦ College AU

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝ Gemini Feed: two similar individuals that feed into their own destruction with emotional disconnect and a lack of mutual respect and love.❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ ‘Til Death We Do Art | Seokjin

 ✦ Zombie AU

 ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

  ❝Perhaps the most surprising part of the Zombie Apocalypse is stumbling upon a group of friends intent on using art to save the world. If you don’t protect them from the dead, who will?❞

 ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Midnight City | Yoongi

    ✦ Undercover Cop / Crime Ring AU

    ✦ genre: angst, smut

    ❝You’ve been bothering your police friend for years about the supposed crime ring led by the wealthiest men in Seoul, with nothing to show for it except a friend that won’t answer your calls. That is until a new graduate of the police academy decides to humor you and check out a few of your leads. Now you’re falling deeper and deeper into the world of Midnight City and you’re not sure if there’s a way out.❞

    ✦ status: brain blast

 ✶ Love Island | Bangtan OT7

    ✦ reality dating show AU

    ✦ genre: angst, smut, fluff

    ❝A cast of hot young singles looking for love and romance on the beautiful island of Mallorca and the chance to win $50,000. What more do you need to convince you to audition? It’s gonna be a long, hot summer.❞

     ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Again and Again | Jimin

   ✦ Reincarnation AU, enemies to Lovers

   ✦ genre: angst, smut, fluff

   ❝You have lived many lives for many millennia, and in each one you find each other. Like a sick joke, the universe keeps forcing you and the soul you hate together. This life it’s no different.❞

    ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Bottom of the River | Jungkook

   ✦ Witch AU

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝When you met Jungkook the world was at peace. It was okay for you to be involved with a normie, you and your coven’s biggest problem was debating whether buying your tarot cards off of Amazon was ethical. But then the world as you knew it ended and Jungkook seemed to always be caught in the middle of it.❞

   ✦ status: brain blast

✶ March 10th | Yoongi

  ✦ friends to lovers au

  ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝Yoongi: your friend through it all that hates his birthday. So you come to an agreement, you won’t celebrate it. You’ll meet up the day after and hang out like it’s any other day. Even when you move miles and miles away from each other you still meet up every year on that day.❞

  ✦ status: brain blast

✶ The Adventures of N’Sync and Mr. President | Namjoon

    ✦ college au, friends to lovers

    ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝You and Namjoon are unlikely friends, the bi art girl to his student body president, business and Polisci double major perfect self. It all started the day you both fell in love with the same girl. And the rest is, how they say, history.❞

    ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Be Right Back | Taehyung

    ✦ supernatural au (set in the Say My Name universe)

    ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

    ❝When your boyfriend died you thought you had lost him forever. Then one day a book falling from your shelf opens your eyes to the strange and unusual. Forever became real that day, but it’s not the paradise you’d always dreamed it would be.❞

    ✦ status: brain blast

✶ Jinkies | Hoseok

   ✦ Scooby Doo AU, friends to lovers

   ✦ genre: fluff, angst, smut

   ❝You are definitely not in love with your friend, co-worker, and leader of Mystery Inc.. Sure, whenever he enacts his favorite plan, splitting up, the two of you usually go off together, and that one time you pretended to be a couple for an investigation was weird, but you don’t have feelings for your friend. Sure, he’s handsome, and confident, and kind, and a good friend.... Zoinks, maybe you are in love with Hoseok.❞

   ✦ status: brain blast

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #222

“hold your breath, my dear, we’re going under.”

Have you ever kicked a vending machine? No. Have you ever stayed online for a long time waiting for someone? Ha ha, yeah... I did that for Mini a lot when I was younger. Would you survive in prison? I can almost guarantee I'd find a way to kill myself, no. What is your favorite condiment to go with french fries? Probably ketchup. What do you have a habit of doing when engaging in a conversation with someone? Obsess over if I'm making eye contact correctly. Like the WHOLE time I will be thinking about it. Have you ever lost a pet in a tragic way? How did you cope? I had a lot of childhood cats run over, and that was always hard to see. As for coping, I just... did. What else do you do. Do you have a favorite classical composer? No. Mini skirts, slutty or stylish? Um, what you wear doesn't determine whether or not you're "slutty." They don't bother me. Do you like a partner who is clean cut or rugged? A mix. Pale or tan, which would you rather be? I like pale skin, I just don't like the texture of mine. The negative of pale skin is the fact you can see flaws more clearly. Is walking cats strange? (like walking dogs) No. What about kids on leashes? What do you think about that? That shit is wild. Teach your children better, or keep them in your sights at all times if they have some kind of condition that makes it challenging to teach them properly. How many piercings have you had, BESIDES ears, no one cares. Two. New tats in your near future? Whenever I myself have the money, my next tattoo appointment will be to enhance my Mark tribute one to better the galaxy texture. I love the guy who's done my tats so far, but there are better out there, and I don't feel he achieved my vision. This tattoo is WILD important to me; it has to be perfect. After that, a "new" tattoo probably won't happen until I have a job or I'm gifted money. How about piercings or re-piercings? "In the near future" is the criteria I'm guessing is still relevant? It depends on how quickly I lose enough weight for my collarbones to be clearly prominent to get dermals. I've been fucking stagnated for a year, though, so I don't know when the hell that's happening... Who would you like to hang out with? There's a lot of old friends and acquaintances that fit this. Next new thing you are wanting to try! Idk. Some sort of job I can actually accomplish. Would you ever visit a psychic medium? Definitely not; I don't believe they're legit. Are some days a waste of makeup? Um so idk if you know, author, but people wear makeup for their own satisfaction. If it makes you feel beautiful, then hell no it's not a waste. Do you watch any beauty gurus on YouTube? Okay I fucking adore Jeffree Star y'all. He's a goddamn Mood and inspirational as ALL hell in terms of his determination, work ethic, and open-mindedness. I watch everything he uploads ever, even though I'm not really interested in makeup. It's cool to watch though; it's an art to me. Do you have a PillowPet? No, but omfg. One of my favorite Christmas memories ever is the night my niece, when she was around two or so, was given one (or something like it?) the night before, we turned the lights out, and lit it up so the colorful stars were all over the room. She was absolutely marveling over it. That was the same night my sister revealed she was pregnant with my nephew, actually. That was a great night. Actually felt like a family. Do you have sleep paralysis? Thank FUCK no. Have you ever wanted an ex back, but found out they were dating someone? I've talked about Jason and Ashley before. God that was a bad. Bad. Fuck-ing. Time. Do you like Placebo? I don't listen to them. Has anyone ever carried you to bed? I mean as a kid, yeah. Idr as a teenager or adult. Would you rather have a wiener dog or an Italian greyhound? The greyhound. Dachshunds are precious, but as of semi-recently, I'm personally against breeding pets with damaging/unhealthy traits, and dachshunds are very susceptible to spine issues. Idk if greyhounds have any issues like that. Do your parents buy you most anything you want? Bitch we poor, no. What is the next craft you are going to make? Probably something for Sara for some special event. I don't think that's much of a spoiler, so I don't mind sharing it. Do you learn choreography easily? I was decent when I was a dance student, but no, I can promise you no. My memory is laughable. If you had to choose, would you rather be taller or shorter? Taller, I guess? Idk. Do you believe that Jesus will come back in your lifetime? No, I don't believe he ever will. What color is your winter coat? ... Shit dude, idr. Idk if I even have one, actually. What’s your favorite candy to receive on Halloween? Gimme all ur Reese's cups. Have you ever spent your birthday alone? No. Have you ever had a themed b-day party? I'm sure I did as a kid. Were you afraid of heights as a child? No. I am now tho. Which dollar store is your favorite? Here, Dollar Generals are everywhere and generally the preferred one, I believe. What food gives you diarrhea? Totally serious, most exceptionally "fancy" foods; by that, I assume things with lots of intricate spices and other ingredients. At least severe gas pains are almost guaranteed when I eat out somewhere. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Ha ha man, I remember as an elementary school student though, we had a play where I SO wanted to be Snow White. What is the most fascinating part of nature? Evolution. I don't know how I once didn't believe in it. Would you ever go vegetarian? I am serious about returning to vegetarianism when/if I get to a weight I'm satisfied with (losing weight w/o meat is more difficult than with, particularly for an extremely picky eater). I wish I could be a total vegan, but I know I'm not capable of that. Once you actually learn about slaughterhouses and farm life... no. What berry is your favorite? STRAW!!!!!!!BERRIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is your dream house? Something in the woods with a nice yard/outdoor decor, flowers, wildlife... What was the reason in you crying last? PTSD. Are there any movies in the theater that you’d like to see? The new IT and Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. What do you think of Coca Cola? It's my third-fave soda. What about polar bears? Gorgeous animals. I will R I O T if they go extinct. My best friend(s) are/is... Sara. When do you want to have your first kid? Never. I am faaar from cut out to be a mother. Which stovetop burner do you use the most? I don't cook, so. The times I've made eggs, uh... I think I use the bottom right? Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? Ugh, we don't have one. What year did you graduate high school? 2014. Do you carry pepper spray? No, but I should with how paranoid I am. What is your favorite gas station? Sheetz is the way to go down here. What have been some of your best garage sale finds? *shrugs* Idr the last time I went to one. Ever worked two jobs or more at once? Hell no. I wouldn't survive. How often do you check your email? Every day, mainly for school. What would you do if your ex came to you crying? It would depend on who. "The" ex, I don't give a fuck how I feel about him, he's getting a tight-ass hug because seeing him cry is awful, and I will always care about him to a certain degree. Well actually, I'd ask him before hugging; I don't know if he'd be fine with me touching him. Girt would get a big 'ole hug for sure. Juan, Tyler, and Aaron I'd ask if they wanted a hug. I'd definitely ask any of them if they wanted to talk/vent to me about whatever is wrong; I can't stand seeing people cry. What school do you go to, what grade? I'm a super late freshman in college. How do you feel about school? It's been a drastic change in my daily life and thus has caused stress, but nevertheless I'm ecstatic to be back because I'm actually making progress towards going somewhere. Are you still a virgin? So I know it sounds like it makes NO sense w/o details, but seriously, I don't know. We had "cheaty" ways to just barely skirt around it because at the time I was abstinent, but pretty sure at some point it became sex. Do you eat chips or crackers more? Man, I haven't had chips in a loooong time... though I love them, man. We have crackers at the house usually, and I snack on them occasionally. Is your bed next to a wall? Who doesn't have their bed against at least one?? Is your bed next to a window? There's one beside me against the wall. Do you have neat handwriting? I think so. The only thing I don't like is I write SOOOOOOOOOO slow. Would you rather be a singer or a dancer? Dancer. Would you rather be a musician or a painter? Painter. What did your hair look like in high school? Long and normally brown, but sometimes I dyed it black with colored highlights. Favorite flavor of hot chocolate? Normal?? What is your top priority in life? My happiness, probably. Have you ever made a gingerbread house? Yeah. Sucky ones, but they were gingerbread houses, lol. Do you prefer candy corn or conversation hearts? EW both are gross. Skeletons or scarecrows? I'll see you in the Skeleton War, fuckers. Who was the last non-relative woman you spoke to in person? My Writing teacher. What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? I did a TOTAL 180 on LGBT rights, and my former, intense pro-life stance has altered quite a lot to mostly pro-choice. What’s an achievement you hope to see humanity accomplish in your lifetime? Man, a lot... A total ban from plastic and finding an alternative for it would be great, as well as the cure of cancer and H.I.V. Make gay marriage legal worldwide. Make great progress on cleaning the oceans. I could go on and on. Do you know anyone who has a PhD? As far as personally, possibly. Like, obviously my doctors do. How do you feel when you’re the center of attention? *buys that red button that says "no" in various fashions solely for this occasion* Are you and your S/O Facebook official? She doesn't have a FB, but mine does say "in a relationship." Do you know anyone who works as a lawyer? Not that I know well anymore; a former best friend is in the process of becoming one, though. So proud of her. Which would bother you more: being told you’re not likable or being told you’re not sensible? Being told I'm not likable would really hurt. How many bedrooms does your house have? Two. Have you ever had a dream in which you died? Yeah. Does the thought of having wrinkles when you’re older upset you? Not really. Everyone gets them. Do you use Snapchat? No. Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? Yes. What was your first job? And how long did you work there? I was a sales associate at GameStop. I was employed for like two months, but I worked very few days before I crumbled. Where is the last place you were other then where you are right now? School. How do you feel about the last person you kissed? I adore her. Lol, Lawl, Rotfl, Lmao, or Lmfao? (Which you use most) Lmao or lol. Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Not knowingly to me. Do you really care about name brands? Not just for the sake of being a certain name; I do, however, care about the quality of brands, of course, such as taste for foods or being comfortable in clothes. Describe your favorite pair of jeans to me please. I don't have any. When I was actually slim though, I had a pair of maroon skinny jeans with a black dappling texture, and there were holes in them where the fabric was just black, and I loooooved them. Those and my leather boots was A Look. To wash in the shower, do you use a loofa? That's not the technical name for what I use according to Mom when I've called them that, but rather a body sponge or something like that, but it's like the same thing. Have you ever ridden on a horse? Yes, though not at a gallop or anything "real." Just at things like school fairs. Are you polite? I think I'm very polite, honestly. Do you prefer bright or muted colors? Bright, usually. Can you roll your tongue? I used to be able to after practicing all day once with a friend ha ha, but I haven't been able to for a long time. Definitely can't now with snake eyes. Are you a light weight when it comes to alcohol? No, apparently. Which accents can you emulate pretty well? British and country. How loud do you listen to music? Too loud, I know. Are you more awkward talking to people in real life or online? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, real life. I don't think I'm half bad online. Do you bruise easily? So easily that I was tested for anemia or whatever it's called where you bleed easily (the test was negative, thankfully). Despite feeling bruised, though, I usually don't have an actual mark. Have you ever bought pre-ripped jeans? All my jeans were. I hate plain, boring jeans. What are you most likely to spend money on? Tattoos, lol... I genuinely think I'm good with money, I feel because of the financial position I've grown up and lived in, although I have never had a stable source of income, so it's hard to really determine that yet. I'm quite sure I'll be fine, but I really do hope I handle my money well when I do and don't invest all my spendable (as in, not money that I'm saving for emergencies) money into just tats. Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? Welcome to my life, lol. I'm at an age where it's starting to get embarrassing, but. Idk how to change it. What’s the weirdest way you’ve ever heard somebody die of? *shrug* When was the last time you (dis)liked someone without really knowing them? I dunno. I try to not do that. When was the last time you wore a mask? What did it look like? Hell if I remember. I don't even remember wearing any on Halloween as a child. What comes up on your recommended list on YouTube? Mainly let's plays or music. Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? Hell no, that wouldn't last long. How many true heart breaks have you had in your lifetime? One. Do you have any gay family members? My mom has a gay cousin. Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Sara. Would you ever get a boob job? No; I don't care enough about them too. I wish they were smaller. I liked mine when I was a healthy weight, so, let's get back to that size, please. What would you think if you found out your ex was gay? Aaron, I think he actually is. Juan, trust me, he's not. Jason couldn't convince me he was gay even if he tried. I very highly doubt he'd be bi/pan, either. Girt, I would be surprised, but not like, immensely. I don't have a clue about Tyler and if he has any gay tendencies/history. Would you ever take someone back if you found out they cheated on you? NO SIR-REE. Do people ever compliment your eyes? Yeah. Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? I don't know. I used to feel REALLY strongly about porn just being a big 'ole fucking nope, but whatever man, we're sexual animals. Better you take care of urges yourself rather than, you know, raping someone or something. If I personally caught my s/o doing it, idk how I'd feel, but knowing me and my self-esteem, I'd feel I'd probably jump to the whole (if we were serious) "um hi I'm your fckng gf what am I not enough" thought path. I don't think I'd be livid, though. Ask the old Britt, and we would've broken up there, probably. Who’s the last person that hung up on you? *shrug* Do you have a common first name? Yeah. Have you ever been engaged? No. Do you have any tattoos on your arms? Four, currently. They're gonna be covered one day. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else’s property? No. Have you ever been punched? No. What do you usually order from Olive Garden? I will, without fail, get the spicy shrimp fritas and be the happiest human being on Earth. How do you feel about bats? I absolutely adore them. Do you get excited when you learn you have to dress up? Quite the opposite, actually. What brand of hair spray do you use? I don't use it. Do you like it when guys wear hats? I have zero opinion on this. Burger King, McDonald's, or Wendy's? I prefer Wendy's. If you type for awhile, do your fingers start to hurt? No. Are you the type of person who would study for a test for hours? No, I'm not. I generally don't even have to like, intensely study; I tend to learn upon reading things, or in like math, performing the actions just a couple times. "Studying" doesn't tend to work for me; if it gets to that point, it probably won't stick, regardless of how many times I try. Are you a lazy person? I hate admitting just how lazy I am. But I mean again, it also depends on what is at stakes. Does your house have a doorbell? Yes, though I actually don't know if the doorbell works... Favorite album? Ozzy Osbourne's Black Rain. Favorite farm animal? PIGS! Has your Facebook ever been hacked? No. Do you spell gray with an A or an E? I use the American spelling ("gray"). Would you rather get money or gift cards for your birthday? I would be perfectly and entirely happy with purely money for my birthday, because that equals tattoos, lmao. Have you ever spoken to a detective before? No. Have you ever played laser tag? Once on a double-date with Jason and our old roommates/friends. Do you ever share things on Facebook? Almost all I do are share things I support, find funny, find as inspirational or cute, stuff like that. I can confidently say the majority of people I even have as "friends" on there do not care that much about my personal life. Is anyone you’re close to in the hospital right now? I mean, define "close." My grandmother's going through chemo, but we're not like... my definition of particularly "close," though she's close-ish family, so idk. Is your Wifi protected? Of course. What did you have for lunch today? I didn't eat lunch. How often do people write on your Facebook wall? On my birthday, lmao. Does your phone have a cover on it? No. I'd say I want one, but way more than that, I want a new phone. Mine is godawful. What color was your swim suit this year? I mean my most recently-worn is black, but I think it'd probably be too big for me now. I haven't swam in a long time. Do ladders scare you? Yes. Do you have any pictures of you and your friends in your bedroom? No. How do you eat Oreos? I'm one of those people that breaks the cookie to eat the cream first. Who or what sleeps with you? My cat Roman. Do you know anyone with the same name as you? Yes, but spelled differently. Are you pro-life or pro-choice? Honestly, it's become almost embarrassing to say I was ever pro-life. I'm vehemently pro-choice now. What color LED is the display in your car? Okay so Mom's has a rainbow of options, but I think it's currently stuck on... purple? I think? How am I unsure???? I'm in it every day?????????? Who was your first kiss with? Jason, my first "real" boyfriend. What kind of milk do you drink? I'll drink anywhere between skim to whole milk, but I'm not really a fan of skim despite having grown up with it. What aren’t you afraid to stand up for? I'd stand up for gay rights if it killed me. Do you know anybody in the military? Loosely. What was the last hotel you stayed at? I don't have the slightest clue. Do you have any STDs? No. What’s your preferred salad dressing? YO the Olive Garden dressing is b o m b. Do you have a favorite NASCAR driver? No. Who’s your celebrity crush? I'm almost 24 years old ha ha ha hahaha I'm too old for a celebrity crush aha hahaa haa aahha ah hahaaaaaaaaaaaaa- What color is your fridge? Black. Do you know the metric system well enough to live in Canada? No, admittedly. What was the biggest bruise you’ve ever had? Tell me the place (on your body) and the story of it! Idr. If you have Etsy account - show the very last item you added to the favorites. If not - either skip or just visit Etsy and find one thing you like: I think I have one, but I don't use it. I don't feel like looking. What would you do if you knew that you will be single to your very death (even if you’re in a relationship now)? Nothing would change...? My relationship status doesn't alter my goals and such. Are there any exchange students at your school? We have a LOT of foreign students at my school, so I'd assume so. Have you got any half or step siblings? I have three (actually four, but I don't know one tho) half-siblings and technically a step-brother, but I don't see him as a "brother," really. What cars do your siblings drive, if they do drive? My older sister has a red car, and my younger has a... black Kia, I think? It's dark is all I know for sure, and I only know the brand because it's new. I don't live with either or see their cars frequently elsewhere, so idk. What about your parents? Idk what kind my dad drives, but BOY do I know my mom's car, lmao. It's an older white Kia (I think?) with the bumper fuckin zip-tied onto the car bc it was given to us after a dance friend hit a poor deer, lmao. Look, we don't complain, shit was free. Do you like kid’s movies? Yo I do NOT trust you if you claim you like NO "kids' movie." Describe your handbag. I'm actually gonna look it up. (https://sourpussclothingwholesale.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/night-owl-bag.jpg?w=584&h=364) When was the last time you had to take someone home? ME, never. I don't have my license because I'm terrified of driving. Who was it, and where did you take them home from? N/A Have you ever known someone online and then met them in person? Sara Jaaaaaane!!! :'> There are other friends I'd like to meet, too. If so, which website did you meet on? Sara and I met via YouTube when it was actually community-oriented. Have you ever been to the beach? Yeah, multiple times. Have you ever been kicked out of somewhere? Yeah, I guess. She didn't actually like, force me outside, but I had to call my mother to pick me up. Have you ever intentionally trolled? No. Did you get swine flu? No. What is your favorite type of cat? Aesthetically, I find Persians to be way too cute, though I don't support their continued breeding. It's literally abuse to breed animals that deformed. Do you support the LGBTQ community? I'm bisexual, so like- Have you ever eaten a veggie burger? Yeah, the Morningstar brand from Burger King (not the Impossible Burger one). It's genuinely not bad. If you could meet any major political figure, who would it be? I'm not educated enough on like, any, to properly answer this question. If you drink Monster, what is your favorite flavor? N/A Do you own any Webkinz stuffed animals? I was that Bad Bitch(tm) with like,,,, almost all of them back in the day. If so, do you have a Webkinz online account? It exists, but idr the password sobs. If you had/have a Club Penguin account, how old were you when you got it? I would have a character for like two days, not go back on for years, repeat a couple times... but idk how old I was. Do you own any Nintendo video game consoles/handhelds? GameBoys and a DS Lite, yes. What religion were you raised in? Roman Catholicism. Are you still that religion, if you had one? Far from it. What religion/spiritual path intrigues you the most, if any? Buddhism and Wicca. What ancient culture intrigues you the most, if any? Idk. Were/are you a teacher’s pet? Not like, the kind that sucked up to the teacher for their personal benefit, but if you mean just as in the teacher's favorite, yeah. Do you like pink lemonade? Hell yeah man. What’s your favorite U2 song, if you have one? I don't listen to them. Were your parents born in the United States? Yeah. Do women breastfeeding in public make you feel uncomfortable? I want it to be perfectly and violently clear that I fucking despise you if a child being fed fucking offends you. Why or why not? Because women's bodies aren't sexual fucking objects designed for your viewing pleasure. Write an unpopular/offensive opinion of yours here. I’m interested. Buckle up, lads. Seatbelts fastened? Ass properly in the seat? Airbags in place? There are two genders.

[apriorisea]

BTS Imagine Series: The Fight, Pt. 1

Namjoon x You (Part 2)

It’s 9:30 on a Thursday night and you are just barely getting home. Teaching has never been an easy job, but you have never had such a disrespectful class before--and their parents were even worse. As the end of the semester neared, it seemed like every single previously-disengaged student suddenly wanted hours of private tutoring sessions, and every overbearing parent wanted to corner you in your office and yell for half an hour about how poorly their child was doing in school. You hesitated at the bottom of the staircase up to your apartment, feeling the exhaustion in your bones and wondering if you’d even be able to make it. 

As you were standing there, your eyes drifted to the windows of your place and you realized that there were lights on. Confusion was quickly replaced with a rush of excitement: Namjoon must be home. 

This realization propelled you up the stairs, encouraging your screaming muscles to keep going. It had been 4 days since you had seen him, really, and the thought of being able to be with him for even a few hours made you giddy.

It had been a hard month. With his comeback only 3 weeks away now, every single member of the band and company had been working overtime to make sure they were prepared--and no one had been working harder than Namjoon. With all of the practices, writing sessions, tech rehearsals, company meetings, press junkets, MV filming, and photo sessions, he was barely home lately. When mixed with your complicated schedule, the result was a lot of time apart.

And when you did see each other......You hesitated for only a second and stumbled as you missed a step. You couldn’t remember the last time you had been able to be with your boyfriend for an extended period of time, or go on a date, or have dinner. You felt your cheeks flush as you realized you weren’t even sure when he had kissed you last. You moved a little slower, your mind conjuring other ideas. Maybe something is wrong. Whenever the two of you did pass--because that’s what it felt like, ships passing in the night, never having time to sit down and actually interact--he was so...short with you. His responses were always clipped, like he couldn’t spend waste even one of his precious seconds talking to you. You’d weathered it pretty well, mentally excusing every one of his behaviors, but now that you had all this time to think about it....

Stop. You forced yourself to shake out of that thought. The lights were on, he was home, it was all going to be fine. Maybe you could even order pizza or something, have a nice night in. This positivity propelled you forward, making the last few steps a breeze. You opened the door hopefully and smiled automatically when your assumption was confirmed: he was sitting at the kitchen table, his back to the door and his hood up. Since he had his laptop in front of him, you also assumed he had his headphones in, but when you closed the door behind you, he turned his head partially. 

“Hi, babe!” you said with a smile.

He doesn’t really answer, but you can see him sort of nod his head before turning back to his work. Even from where you stood at the door you could see he had his music writing program open. You felt a rush of sympathy and pride at his work ethic--how could he still be editing music, with the concert 3 weeks away?

You set your bag down and slip off your boots. “Have you eaten yet?” He shakes his head no. “...Me either. What do you think? Pizza?”

When he doesn’t answer, you take a few steps towards him, wondering if he hadn’t heard you. “Hey,” you try again. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Don’t care.”

Every single negative thought that had accompanied you up the stairs reappeared. It wasn’t just that he hadn’t answered your question, it was the way he had answered it: his tone was clipped and devoid of emotion. You felt the heat rise to your face. How could he still be acting that way? You’d put up with it for weeks, but tonight it was too much. You were tired, you were sore, you’d so been looking forward to seeing him, and this is how he reacts? Feeling yourself start to shut down, you altered your course, walking to the fridge instead. “Big surprise. Do you care about anything anymore?” The frigid response flew out of your mouth almost before you realized it was coming.

“What?” For how little he seemed to care about your presence, he definitely cared about your response. He turned slowly in his chair, looking at you for the first time. 

The irritation in his tone only made you more upset. Folding your arms over your stomach, you leaned back against the counter. “Well it’s clearly not me you care about,” you accuse. “You can’t even manage to say hi?”

He gestures at his computer. “I’m busy--”

“Yeah,” you interrupt. “I know. You’re busy. Too busy to even be polite, apparently.”

“You’re kidding, right?” He reaches up and angrily yanks off the headphones, tossing them on to the table. Jabbing a finger at his computer, he continues, “Do you even know the pressure I’m under right now? We are 3 weeks away from comeback, and you’re going to get on my case about not wanting to order pizza for dinner??”

“Oh,” you say coldly, “Do you not want pizza? I wouldn’t know, considering you didn’t even have the decency to give me an answer.” The disbelief floods his face and it only makes you feel angrier. “You think you’re the only one who’s busy? You don’t even know how much I have to do, because all you think about is yourself. It’s so selfish.”

His eyebrows shoot up. “Selfish?” he repeats. “You’re out here attacking me about a stupid pizza, and you think I’m the selfish one??”

“It’s not just about a stupid pizza!” Tears sting your eyes as you realize that it’s been over a month since the two of you had been able to eat dinner together. One month. How could he not understand that?

He leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. “Right. Then what on earth is it actually about?” he asks condescendingly.

“It’s about you and your arrogance,” you snap. “You’ve been acting like this for a month now.” He scoffed, but you ignored him. “Every single time I’ve seen you in the last month, you’ve been snippy and mean. It’s like you can’t even be bothered to talk to me.”

“I’ve been busy!” he explodes, his frustration boiling over.

A part of you is sort of glad he’s yelling; at least it’s better than the usual apathetic response. “So that gives you the right to act like this? I feel like all you do lately is ignore me.” You fight to keep your voice steady to the end of the sentence.

He stares at you for a long moment, trying to decide what to say. Finally, he reaches for his headphones and says, “Well, that sounds like a personal problem.”

It’s like someone knocked the wind from you. You literally can’t catch your breath. Of all the insults he could have thrown, of all the arguments he could have made, even screamed at you, this was a million times worse. Namjoon could be straightforward--you’d usually describe him as “blunt”--but he was never cruel. A thousand thoughts exploded in on you:  he hasn’t kissed me in weeks, we don’t talk anymore, he avoids me, he ignores me, he dismisses me. It’s over.  Strangely, the tears that were clogging your eyes earlier disappear completely, leaving you with a hollow, aching feeling in your throat and a rushing in your ears. Your mind races, trying to decide what to do; meanwhile, he’s still sitting there, his shoulders hunched defensively. He hasn’t put the headphones back on yet, but he also hasn’t put them down and he hasn’t looked at you. Fine. Feeling your heart pounding in your chest, you push away from the counter and walk back to the door, slipping on your boots and grabbing your coat. Even though he hasn’t turned around, you know he’s aware of you.

“You’re right,” you manage, your voice sounding strange. “It is a personal problem.” You open the door and walk out, shutting it firmly behind you. 

With every step you take down the stairs, you’re listening, hoping to hear the door open again, to hear him call your name, to hear his footsteps on the stairs as he races after you, but you make it all the way to the car and there’s nothing. The lights are still on in your place--your old place. Your phone hasn’t rung, the door is still shut. You turn the engine and as soon as you are backed out of your usual parking spot, the tears come back. You cry all the way to your best friend’s house.

_____________

[justanotherwannabeclassic]

Make This Place Your Home

Gideon Gold and Juliet Jones discuss the ethics of using "blood money" and the impact of having fathers who are murderers. (Finding Neverland-verse)

Author’s Note: Over the course of writing Finding Neverland, I've received a number of requests to write more about Gideon and Juliet's relationship. I've hit a bit of a roadblock with FN, so I'm writing this (and others) in hopes of getting the muse back from the story that started it all.Timeline-wise, this is set about five years before the events of Finding Neverland, and two years before Gideon and Juliet get together.

Read Finding Neverland and related works!

Rating: T (lots o’cursing)

Dedicated to @distant-rose and @phiralovesloki.

“Wow. This place is fantastic.”

Gideon watches as Juliet walks around the space, the natural light filtering through the windows creating a golden halo effect out of her blonde hair. She’s barefoot at her own insistence -- “I am not risking my boots scuffing your new floor!” -- and he notes how her toes are painted a shocking pink, a contrast to her black nails. She walks over to one of the windows, and lets out a low whistle of appreciation.

“Really, this place is amazing. This is seriously yours?”  

“Seriously.” He crosses his arms over his chest, his frown deepening as he leans his back against the kitchen island. Juliet’s praise isn’t unwarranted. The condo is exceptional -- open floorplan, two bedrooms, hardwood floors, and plenty of natural light. It’s a dream, and certainly better than anything he could imagine owning in New York. “Well, technically my parents own it, but my father was already discussing changing it over to my name.”

“Lucky.” There’s no sarcasm in her tone like he’d expect, but there’s some underlying humor there. She crosses what is supposed to be the living area and walks into the kitchen, her right index finger trailing over the granite countertop. “You think If I get into med school, my parents would buy me a condo?”

“I’m pretty sure if you decided you wanted to go to med school, your parents would be convinced that you were cursed.”

“And they would be right.” Gideon turns to see her opening the fridge, and she pulls out two bottles of the beer she had brought him. ( “You told me your parents bought you a place, so I brought a housewarming gift.” ) He bites his tongue to keep from giving the lecture he wants to make. She’s not yet twenty-one, and she’s bound to get caught with that fake ID of hers eventually. But, he feels overwhelmed and he desperately needs a drink, so he takes the beer without chiding.

“God, this is seriously getting to you, isn’t it?” she asks, because of course Juliet expects him to give her a lecture. That’s their thing, this weird sort of dynamic they formed since she they bumped into each other months ago in a coffee shop downtown -- his weird sort of not-entirely-brotherly protectiveness clashing with her desire to really let loose.

“It wouldn’t get to you?”

“Have you seen the price of rent?” Juliet answers with a snort. She lifts herself on the island, her long legs dangling over the counter. She takes a long pull before asking, “What’s Rachel think?”

“Rachel doesn’t know.” He doesn’t meet her eyes when he answers, instead focusing on the bottle in his hand as guilt churns in his stomach.

“Bad form, Gid.”

“Yeah, I know.” He takes another drink, still not meeting what he’s sure is Juliet’s disappointing stare. Gideon knows he’s somewhat in the wrong, that there’s some unspoken rule that says he ought to have told his girlfriend of almost two years about his recent windfall before the girl he didn’t even consider a friend a year ago. But the situation is complicated, and there are things in his life that Rachel is unable understand that only someone from Storybrooke could. “What could I even say?”

“Well you could begin with ‘So my father bought me a fucking condo in Washington Heights,’. That’s what you texted me.”

“And then what? Tell her I’m very much considering telling them I don’t want it because it was bought with blood money.” He glances over to Juliet. Her expression is worse than disappointed, it’s just sad. “You know I can’t.”

“You could.”

“It’s not that easy, and you know it.” He catches her turn her right wrist away from him Even if he can’t see it, he knows she has a tattoo of the cardinal points drawn on her list in black ink. He remembers how he’d talked her out of getting it one drunken evening, and how two days later she’d sent him a picture of the drawing inked on her skin. “What’d you tell Adam about that?”

She glowers at the mention of her boyfriend. “That compasses are a thing for my family -- which is the truth.”

“Bet you didn’t mention the beanstalk. Or the piracy.”

“No, I didn’t.” She rolls her eyes. “But it’s different with us. Adam and I just got together. You two have been dating for awhile.”

“Yeah, well, it’s complicated.” He knows he should at least examine the reasons for why he doesn’t particularly want to reveal to his girlfriend his fairy tale history. They’re probably similar to the reasons why he and Rachel haven’t discussed their plans post-graduation, when he’ll still be in New York and she’ll be be jetting off to Mozambique for the Peace Corps, the words ‘ expiration date ’ weighing heavy in the back of his mind. “Can we please stop discussing my love life?”

“And start analyzing your brooding? Sure.”

“It’s more than just brooding.”

“And yet, here you are, in your fancy condo that costs hundreds of thousands of dollars, sitting here with a drink in your hand, acting all gloomy and ‘woe is me’.” She raises a brow, acting as if her point has just been proven as fact. “Sounds like brooding to me.”

“I didn’t invite you over here to mock me.”

“And why did you invite me over, Gideon Gold?” She quirks her head, her blonde hair falling over her shoulder. We she anyone else, he might have thought she was flirting with him, but he’s gotten to know her well enough to realize this is Juliet in her natural form -- at ease and charismatic. Normally it’s endearing. Now, with the mood he’s in, it’s frustrating.

“I invited you over because I needed someone to talk to, and Robin’s busy.”

“Ouch,” she says with a small laugh, but he can see the hurt in her eyes, and he feels instantly bad. While it’s true that he’d usually call Robin whenever he needs to vent about Storybrooke-related drama, he actually hadn’t been sure what she was doing after he and his parents had parted ways, leaving him to his own devices in the condo his family now apparently owns. Juliet had, in fact, been the first person he’d contacted -- something else he doesn’t have the mental capacity to dwell upon at the moment.

“Look, I needed a friend, okay? And you’re a friend who understands.”

“I’m your friend?”

“You’re fishing.”

“And you’re brooding.” She stares at him pointedly. “Look, I know things between you and your dad are sort of complicated --”

“--to put it lightly--”

“--but maybe you should give him a break. He’s trying to do a nice thing.”

“A nice thing that I didn’t ask for,” he reminds her.He’d already told his parents that he didn’t want them to contribute to his medical school tuition. His father, being the man that he is, instead found a loophole in that declaration. “I don’t want his money.”

“Because it’s blood money.”

“So you do listen.”

She rolls her eyes, but this time it’s accompanied by a smile. “Yeah, idiot, it’s what friends do.”

“I’m your friend?” he parrots.

“Who’s fishing now?” Her eyebrows dance, and he stifles a smile. She then schools her expression into something more serious, and sits down her beer. “Gid, you’ve got to stop beating yourself up over things you have no control over, and start focusing on the things you can.”

“What is that even supposed to mean?”

“It means you’ve got to stop hating yourself for being related to the Dark One. Or Peter Pan. Or the Black Fairy.” She ticks off her fingers as she speaks, her tone growing more pointed with each name. “Yeah, it fucking sucks that all your dad’s money came from a dozen or so curses. But there’s nothing you can do about it except, I dunno, some good.”

“I think you’re completely missing the point.”

“I think you wear a cuff around your wrist to suppress your magic because you’re insanely afraid of going psycho like the rest of your family. I think you want to be doctor not just because you want to do good, but because it would prove you’re not some monster. I think you don’t want this place, not just because you want to strike out on your own, but because you’re scared that if you do, you’re no better than them.” She looks at him expectantly. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

It strikes him, not for the first time, that Juliet Jones is more than just the pretty party girl he’d compartmentalized her as for so long. In the past few months that he’d developed an odd sort of friendship with Juliet Jones -- one that could actually be considered friendship and not the awkward barely acknowledging one another dynamic they’d had for years back in Storybrooke -- he was still learning the ways in which she subverted whatever persona he had believed her to be.

He takes another swig of his beer. “You sure you’re not a psych student? Archie could probably use an intern.”

“Okay, first of all, you’re mixing me up with Robin. You couldn’t pay me enough to intern with Archie. Second of all, it would have been fewer words to say ‘you’re right, Juliet’. Significantly fewer.”

“Pithiness isn’t my forte, I’m afraid.”

“Oh fuck you,” she says, but she’s teasing him. “Tell me I’m right or I won’t help you anymore.”

“You’re helping me? And here I thought you were just calling me broody.”

“Oh my god, say I’m right or I’ll walk out with the rest of your beer.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.” To prove her point, she dismounts herself from the island and makes a show of walking to the refrigerator. She casually leans against the appliance, and crosses her arms. Raising a brow, she says, “Your move.”

He rolls his eyes. “You aren’t totally incorrect.”

She pauses for a moment, considering. Finally, she pushes herself off the fridge. “Close enough.”

Juliet walks over to him, resuming her position by his side. Standing shoulder-to-shoulder, he can feel the warmth of her body against his, and he’s surprised at how comforting it feels. “The way I see it, is that you’ve been given a gift. You might not want it, but it’s a gift nonetheless. You and I both know how much rent costs here, and we both know how much debt med school is going to drown you in. This means less debt.”

“So you’re telling me to stop whining because I’ve been gifted the equivalent of tens of thousands of dollars?” Gideon shakes his head. “Do you know how privileged that makes me sound. How many of my fellow students are drowning in money issues because they don’t have a father who can just buy them an apartment.”

“Well, yeah, I’m one of them. Minus the med school part,” she reminds him, and he winces. Gideon knows she’s received a decent financial aid package from Columbia -- it turns out, the Storybrooke police department doesn’t pay that well -- but she’s complained enough about student debt to know that it doesn’t cover everything. “But that’s the point. So many of your future classmates are probably losing their shit over trying to figure out housing options. And here you are with a perfectly nice second bedroom that you can rent out for practically free. You’d be a housing fairy. Which, to be fair, is far more than anything Blue has done for either of us.”

“If I rented it out for free, they’d think I was a serial killer.”

“That’s why I said practically.”

What she’s saying makes sense. At the very least, it’s something that he hadn’t considered before. Not that he necessarily wants to admit that. “You’re just saying that because you want a cheap place to live.”

She laughs, legitimately laughs. “Please, there’s no way I want to live with you. I don’t want to know what sex noises you make. Assuming you have sex.”

“I have sex!”

“That sounds like something someone who doesn’t have sex would say.” She nudges his shoulder playfully. “But seriously, Gid, take the place. If you ask your dad to sell it, he would, but then some rich asshole would live in this gorgeous place instead of two med students doing the best the can to make the world a better place. Really, you’d be doing the neighborhood a favor.”

Gideon is shocked at how convincing she can be, even with the subtle jabs at his pride. She seems to know it too, because she’s staring up at him with an expression that can only be described as “I told you so,” and he both loves and hates it. “I know what you’re saying, and it doesn’t change the fact that my family got our money through incredibly dubious ways, and that makes me feel weird.”

“You’re acting like I have no idea how you feel.”

“Because you don’t know--”

“Do you how many people my dad has murdered? ‘Cause I sure as fuck don’t,” she asks him, effectively cutting him off. Her voice feels like a punch to the gut. “I know he’s killed like my great grandpa and fucking Merlin and who knows who else. And my childhood home? My mom got that via threatening the first owner because she was the Dark One.”

“Juliet--”

“I know all of this. And I can’t beat myself up over it, because I’ll go crazy. Because at the end of the day, my dad is still a murderer, but he’s also the guy who read me bedtime stories each night and taught me how to sail and cut the crusts off my sandwiches. And my mom is my mom and…” Her voice breaks. He’s not sure what compels him to do it, but Gideon pulls her tight into a hug. He’s not sure if she’s crying or not, but he holds her tight and runs his fingers through her hair. It’s what his mother always did for him when he was sad. It’s what makes him feel better. “I know, okay? Maybe not exactly, but I know.”

“Okay, you know. I was wrong.” He continues to run his fingers through her hair, and she doesn’t stop him, so he continues to go through the motions.

Juliet pulls away from him, but only slightly. Their arms are still wrapped around one another and his hand is in her hair. If Rachel were to walk in -- she wouldn’t -- it would be easy for her to interpret the situation as something untoward, even if it isn’t. “Look, I can’t tell you what to do. But the way I see it is that you have the opportunity to do good. It can’t change what your dad did, but maybe you can change someone’s life. And if you change one person’s life, isn’t it worth it? And, yeah, you’ll be drowning in debt still, but there’ll be less of it, so maybe you can volunteer your time at a free clinic or go to some far off country after you finish your residency and save some babies. I don’t know. I just believe you should think about instead of writing it off completely, okay?”

Juliet stares up at him with such an earnest expression, her blue eyes shining, that Gideon wants to look away from the intensity of it all. He doesn’t. Instead he finds himself saying, “I’ll think about it.”

“Good.” Juliet disentangles herself away from him. Feeling suddenly self-conscious, he stuffs his hands into his pockets as she runs her fingers through her hair. “Are you going to be okay?”

He lets out a feeble laugh. “It’s not the end of the world. I’ll be fine. Just need some time to think.”

“Okay, good.” She smiles another one of her beautiful smiles before glancing at the clock on the oven. “Hey, I’m sorry, but I told Adam that I’d meet him for dinner soon.”

She looks apologetic, and he feels a bit disappointed. He decides not to dwell on why. “Don’t apologize. You didn’t know all of this would happen.”

“No, I didn’t, but I’m glad you called me.” She surprises him with another hug. It’s over before he even realizes it happened. “I could reschedule if you need me to.”

“Seriously, don’t worry about it. Enjoy dinner. Seriously.”

He watches as she slides on her shoes, balancing on one foot, then the other. Before leaving, he turns to him and says, “It really is a nice place.”

“I know,” he replies. Then she is gone, and he is one again alone in a home that may be his. And because of Juliet Jones, he might actually be coming around to that idea.