#i didnt really proof this so hopefully it makes sense lmao

[moss-veins]

Did Sakura realize Naruto’s true feelings for Sasuke?

I’ve wanted to write about this for a while now and seeing posts like this, I finally felt motivated to do it.

In the linked post, Maoam (op) focuses on explaining Sakura’s reactions in certain moments of the manga concerning Naruto’s feeling towards Sasuke and vice versa. My post will be different as I’m only focusing on when I think we first see Sakura realize that Naruto’s feelings towards Sasuke is the same as hers (romantic).

This post will be a little long so I’ll break it off here for people who don’t wish to read it!

Now, this is my first read through of the manga and I think with analysis it usually takes multiple read throughs, however, I do think what is noticed by a first time reader is also important to note. Also, I’m reading the manga with no intention of finding this scenario. I will point out that I did notice this first in the anime, to my surprise since I was not looking for this. I never once speculated that Sakura was ever aware of Naruto’s feelings towards Sasuke and I’ve became aware of this on my own, only coming across the linked post (and others) after I came to my own realization. Honestly, I felt more relieved seeing others’ posts, helping me to not feel crazy for reading this particular anime moment (and manga moment) like this.

First I will state the moment I believed that Sakura realized Naruto’s romantic feelings for Sasuke since I feel like I’ve been prolonging it and, if anyone reads this, it’ll be what the reader actually wants to know. The moment is simply when Sakura meets Naruto at the gate before the retrieval mission.

    Before diving into the moment that this post is about, I wanted to point out what I noticed before leading up into the moment (feel free to skip to the main topic). Something that contradicts anyone who wishes to think that Naruto and Sakura are close friends or even good teammates. Now, I never went into watching or reading Naruto with the mindset that they weren’t good friends or teammates. Since I started watching the anime as a kid, I saw the moments of team 7 being together and “joking” around and took that as friendship. However, as I got older and with reading Naruto blogs which talk in depth about many themes/topics in the manga and anime (as well as being a person who has studied to analyze literature), I’ve come to notice that it was not true friendship. Team 7 only showed the dynamic of coworkers/soldiers. They worked well as a team, they got along (mostly), but when the mission was over they went their separate paths and they didn’t hang out outside of “work.” I’m not counting the times Sakura spent at the hospital at Sasuke’s side because even when he was conscious he ignored her presence. The three had desired closeness but only from certain members and not as a group all together. Naruto desired to be close to Sasuke, Sakura desired to be close to Sasuke, and Sasuke desired to be close to Naruto.

Anyways, the contradiction I saw leading up to Naruto and Sakura at the gate was simply that they did not inform each other of Sasuke’s leaving. To start with Sakura, we know that she is woken up by two assistants getting documents for Tsunade (forgive me, I don’t remember their names). She tells them that Sasuke is gone, but where does she go after? Not to the Hokage and not to Naruto. If Sakura considered Naruto as a close friend or, at the very least, acted on the teammate role, she would have went straight to Naruto to inform him about Sasuke. Especially when the night before she told Naruto about the curse mark, Orochimaru, and her fear that Sasuke would leave the village. However, even though she did that and got comforted by Naruto, still the person who did tell Naruto was Shikamaru... who only told him because he was told to take Naruto on the retrieval mission.

Now, to switch my focus to Naruto... If he cared about Sakura (or liked/loved her) and cared about her worries and love for Sasuke (that he was aware of), why doesn’t he go running to her right after Shikamaru tells him that Sasuke has left? Naruto did not have to go with Shikamaru to pick a team, he could have went searching for Sakura and met Shikamaru at the gates in a time frame set by Shikamaru. However, the thought of telling Sakura does not cross his mind. Now, I’m sure some people may assume that during Shikamaru’s offscreen explanation to Naruto that he may have mentioned Sakura knowing and her role in informing the Hokage. However, we clearly see that is not the case because Naruto reacts with complete shock at hearing that Sakura met up with Sasuke and tried to stop him leaving the village.

“What... Sakura-chan. You already met with Sasuke!?”

Isn’t this interesting? That neither Sakura or Naruto informed the other of Sasuke being gone even though they both care about Sasuke and they’re all on the same team. It’s especially interesting since they all reflect on the picture of team 7 so often, that a viewer/reader who wasn’t attentive would easily believe that they are looking at the team as a whole... that they were all precious to one another, that they were all close friends. However, if they were close, Sakura would have run to Naruto immediately after waking up and Naruto would have went to find Sakura immediately after finding out from Shikamaru. I can’t say why they don’t feel like the other is important enough to do this. I don’t think Sakura at this moment knows of Naruto’s real feelings for Sasuke, therefore there shouldn’t be any reason for her to feel closed off from Naruto. Naruto, on the other hand, supposedly “likes” Sakura, enough to want to date her, but yet she isn’t the first person he runs to? Although, he does know that Sakura “likes” Sasuke... However, I can’t say whether that means he would be bitter to her because of it. He never (at least to this point, I can’t say anything for anything after) at least shows it. If anything, you’d think that the kind Naruto would at least be concerned about Sakura because of her feelings for Sasuke. Yet, neither of them go inform the other.

~~

(The main topic starts here)

Moving on, finally to the moment of Sakura’s realization that Naruto shares the same feelings she has for Sasuke! (Also the moment that the attentive reader becomes aware of Naruto’s true feelings as well.)

Look at her face right after Naruto says this! She’s not reassured by this, is she? Her face does not show comfort in his words, she looks confused and then conflicted? Upset? Nothing positive. If she didn’t notice Naruto’s wording here, the hint of his true feelings behind them, wouldn’t she be comforted that Naruto is showing that he is taking this seriously? That he is also upset about losing his “friend”? Wouldn’t she feel comforted by not feeling alone in her hurt of losing someone she cares about? And what happens right after this? Sakura has a flashback....

Why this particular flashback? Why? Let’s say Sakura hasn’t realized Naruto’s true feelings behind the words he said, don’t you think there are more fitting memories she could recall to? Such as Naruto saving Sasuke from Orochimaru’s Snake during the chunin exam? Or how about the memory of talking to Sasuke after the fight with Gaara, where she assumed that Sasuke saved her and Sasuke corrected her, telling her that it was Naruto who saved her instead. These are just two examples she could recall to assure her that Naruto is strong enough to save people, that he is strong enough to save Sasuke. However, she remembers this flashback instead.... which regards feelings and Naruto’s understanding of them (ignoring the fact that she thinks she is talking to Sasuke when she isn’t). (A little food for thought as well, from her point of view, she is remembering Sasuke asking about how she felt about Naruto... Therefore, she is remembering “Sasuke” only focusing his attention on Naruto since the beginning....) 

Again, why would she choose to focus on a memory that states, “He (Naruto) has now really become the troublemaker and disrupter of my love life... He seems to be enjoying watching me being troubled. He doesn’t understand anything about me...”

What did Naruto just say to her to trigger this memory? This... “Sakura-chan, you really like Sasuke, huh? I know how much pain you’re in because of Sasuke... I can understand.”

This is followed by:

He Always Knew. Or in other words (and translations) he always understood. This is the moment to me that she understood what Naruto meant behind his words (which could be why she is crying so hard yet again). She was hit with awareness and her flashback helped her to understand Naruto’s feelings as well. It’s also very interesting that she follows it with he always helped me. Sakura knows that Naruto has indeed always helped her and that he tries to make others feel better... So of course, Sakura would bet that Naruto would continue to help her regarding Sasuke even if she starts to see him as a rival for Sasuke’s love/attention (which Naruto kind of always was). Also, it’s important to remember that Sakura is a symbol of selfish love, so of course she is going to prioritize her feelings over Naruto’s. I think this is also why they never become closer than teammates. They never keep in touch unless they’re on a mission together (for an example, the years Naruto was gone with Jiraiya for training, they did not keep in touch). 

~~

(What follows are kind of stray thoughts which move away from Sakura’s initial realization that this post was about, so continue reading if you’d like!)

This may also be why, later in Naruto part 2, we see her lie to Sai about Naruto’s feelings towards Sasuke.

“Naruto... Thinks of Sasuke as being like a brother. That’s why.” It’s obvious she is lying in this panel, because she is immediately paralleled to Sai who is also lying about his feelings towards someone important to him. They’re both drawn to only show the bottom portion of their faces, from the side, and we can’t see their eyes. I mean, this may only be caught after the first time reader learns of the information we get later about Sai’s feelings that allows us to know that he is lying here. However, Kishimoto definitely knew Sai was lying in this moment and Sakura is lying as well. Sakura knows that Naruto doesn’t see Sasuke as a brother but she’s not going to outwardly admit that, huh? Also, the linked post mentioned above also goes over Sakura’s reaction to Naruto calling Sasuke “cooler” than Sai and how Sakura doesn’t genuinely smile in that moment, and honestly she looks a little worried. (that panel in its self seems like she is trying to distract Naruto’s view away from Sasuke and to a guy that “resembles” Sasuke instead.... but that’s for a whole other post).

~~

Naruto’s face when he makes the “nice guy promise” to Sakura is obviously a forced smile. I’m not the first person to bring this up but I think it’s important to touch on it since I’m talking about the moment it happens in. Naruto’s action of hiding his pain behind a smile is something that the manga/anime has always showed us. For one example, here is Naruto starting to feel lonely and dejected by Jiraiya and we see he is hurt by Jiraiya’s words and refusal to stay with him while he trains, but he quickly changes to a smile to hide his emotions.

~~

Another small thing I noticed is that after Naruto’s promise he leaves with Shikamaru’s team. There is no “goodbyes” or “I’ll see you soon” or any other exchange with Sakura. Perhaps he didn’t want to put on an act anymore and chose to put his focus on something else. To seem like the outgoing goofball he portrays himself as. We know Naruto prefers this type of attention anyways.

Also it’s interesting seeing Naruto’s reaction to Kiba, the face doesn’t look like a forced smile anymore (perhaps a peek behind the mask?) and it quickly turns into a determined one. He now isn’t putting on a fake act for Sakura (”a promise only for her”) and recites his Ninja Way. Before Sakura showed up at the gate Naruto only appeared outwardly to be determined and confident in this mission to return Sasuke back to village, and now thanks to Kiba bringing his attention away from Sakura, Naruto went back to how he was before.

~~

Fin.

[sneakydraws]

Well, here it is - a lengthy explanation of each card in my mdzs major arcana deck and what I meant to convey/what i would have changed in retrospect/what alternatives i considered! It’s a bit messy and my typing style is lazy but hopefully it will be an interesting read to some of you :)

And so you don’t say I didn’t warn you - jiang cheng’s section (11 justice) is absurdly long lmao

0 the fool  I elaborated on this in the post itself but yeah basically jin ling is kind of representative of all the damage and trauma caused by the past, and there’s a kind of danger there of him falling victim to the same vices as the older characters and repeating the same mistakes and perpetuating the cycle of war and misery (the cycle that we already see with how the jin sect became the new wen sect, and later with how jgy became the new wwx) and he has a lot of room to grow! He grows so much over the course of the novel, comes to realise the complexities of the past and gets a harsh life lesson in how nothing is as black and white as it seems. But ill save talking about his progress for the end, for now whats important is that he has room to grow and also a dog. I don’t really have a justification for the sun, i mostly just thought it looked sick? It made its way to the next card as well, where it makes a bit more sense, but then i realised it was a dumb motif to include 1 the magician I still very much like wwx for the role, and that illustration would have probably had him raising a corpse on his left and pointing threateningly to the sun on his right. I considered including the table as well, with some mdzs relevant items replacing the card suits. Anyway, like i said wwx got a few cards to himself already so i went with the alternative wq design, since i think she fits the card as well. Both she and wwx are highly skilled people, extremely driven once they set their mind to something. The card to me symbolises the creative mind as well as a general drive for action, which fits them both - wwx was famously a prolific inventor, and wq came up with a previously unheard of surgery, after all. This card strays pretty far from the rider-waite deck design, largely because i was still figuring out how i wanted to approach this series, but you can still see the influence. 2 the high priestess I was actually going to skip this card at first because I couldn’t think of a fitting character, but once i considered a qings character post death, it all fit pretty well. She was already a highly intuitive person in life, and in sharing her memories with wwx she is, in a way, relaying a kind of secret knowledge. Anyway she’s one of my fav characters so im glad i got a chance to include her. The coffins could be interpreted to be xxc and sl or xxc and xy 3 the empress Theres other mother figures in mdzs who got to be mothers for a longer time, but jyl definitely embodies the positive aspects of this card the best. She’s nurturing, kind, emotionally supportive, she already mothered wwx and jc quite a bit when she was young. Plus i liked that the rw card had both water and flowers, making an easy lotus connection. In retrospect the stars look kind of out of place and i should have replaced them with something more relevant... Also, i should have had her hold a lotus seed pod instead of a flower, haha 4 the emperor Like i said I considered jc for the role but hoching bullied me into admitting that nmj was better… they’re both more of an inverted emperor than an upright one but then again theres hardly any character in mdzs who would fit upright emperor so. Jgs was also considered but he’s even uglier than nmj so i couldn’t bear to draw him 5 the hierophant It was pointed out to me that lqr would have fit this card better and the truth if that statement haunts me to this day. Unfortunately I have no space in my brain for lqr so lxc got the role instead. My main reason was his role during the wen destruction of gusu lan, when he ran away with the contents of the library - this is why there’s bookshelves behind him. The keys, take, from the rider-waite deck, are meant to represent the gusu pendants that allow you to enter 6 the lovers Im sure many people would have chosen wangxian here but I uhh don’t really care abt wangxian personally? And also their love story is so convoluted that jyl and jzx seem idyllic by comparison lol. Also i didnt really have an idea for who to put in the angel’s place for wangxian… mme jin certainly did not get these two together in the end but undeniably she and mme yu did initially give them a chance to fall for each other so. Thats something i guess. Anyway the trees became their sects’ flowers and the mountain became the burial grounds - an omen of their tragic fate, basically 7 the chariot There might have been other characters who fit this card better but i couldn’t really think of another card for lwj and i thought it would be weird to not include him… anyway i don’t really care for current timeline lwj BUT i do like that he was clearly influenced by wwx to walk his own path in life based on his moral convictions rather than follow his sect’s rules blindly. The chariot is to me a card of self control, self determination and focused action, so it seemed fitting. The composition felt kind of empty without the actual chariot so i padded it out with the guqin, the cloud recess in the bg (it doesn’t look great but i tried to replicate the drama design….) and the bunnies which conveniently fit the colour scheme of the sphinxes in the rider-waite design 8 strength Like i said before, my interpretation of this card is more… morally ambiguous than the quote unquote official meaning, so i thought about manipulative or duplicitous characters more than kind characters whose strength is expressed through gentleness (though i did consider jyl briefly for the latter interpretation). As such, i considered both jgy and nhs, but ended up going with jgy largely because i couldn’t pass up the opportunity to put the nie sect’s beast as the lion. 9 the hermit My thoughts immediately went to bssr lol. It may be an overly literal interpretation but whatever, i like it just fine. And i like that i managed to echo the rider-waite silhouette in the mountain and the tree (and even in bssr herself) 10 wheel of fortune God i love the parallels between these 2… this card to me is about how you cant trust your current situation, good or bad, to last forever, and these 2 embody that perfectly imo. Wwx went from son of a well off servant and a powerful cultivator, to street rat orphan, to adopted son of sect leader jiang, to double orphan, to MIA, to terrifying but admired warrior, to terrifying and despised traitor, to dead, to, at the very end, suddenly respected and trusted again. The dishonesty and cheapness of whatever the public’s current opinion of him is is portrayed beautifully as far as im concerned. And jgy of course claws his way up to power only to instantaneously become public enemy number one, to the point that he’s probably blamed for stuff there’s no reason to believe he had a hand in. Wei wuxian’s silent astonishment at how quickly the cultivation world turns against jgy and towards him again is a delicious moment of thematic resonance.  11 justice I settled on this card for jc after he got booted from the emperor seat but i do think it fits, in a somewhat convoluted way. I turned both the sword and the scales into visual representations of the golden core transfer (can you tell im obsessed with it). According to biddy tarot, the justice card is partly about searching for the truth, and the scene where jc finds out about the transfer is of course a big deal. I was also very influenced by the reversed meaning again - which is about being reluctant or unwilling to face or accept the consequences of your actions. I feel on an intuitive level that this fits jc but I’m not sure how well i can explain it - it’s something about how he’s a little too comfortable scapegoating wwx for things that were also, if much less so, influenced by his actions, and also something about the way he keeps wwx at an arm’s length emotionally but still leans on him and accepts his support when he really needs it, and somewhat hypocritically expects wwx to put the needs of him and the jiang sect before the needs of others. And also something about the core exchange is the consequence and proof of wwx’s deep - terrifyingly deep, even - love and care for him, which is something jc doesn’t seem to let himself acknowledge. Maybe even something about how you could argue that the way all of the jiangs acted around wwx - jfm’s favouritism that left him with the feeling of a debt he needs to repay, mme yus insistence that he be a servant more than a brother to jc, prepared to give his life for jc, and jc’s own unwillingness - or inability, he was a child after all - to clearly acknowledge wwx as an equal to himself, enabling wwx’s self sacrificial and protective tendencies - that all of this was what caused wwx’s complete and unquestioning willingness to do whatever it took to protect jc, and therefore paved the way to the golden core transfer. And i don’t mean this to be scapegoating jc - especially considering how young he was when this all went down, it wouldn’t be fair to expect this level of emotional perceptiveness, awareness and maturity of him - but i think adult jc has to grapple with the fact that the chain of cause and effect was not as simple as wwx fucking everyone’s lives up to be a martyr, and that both jc and his parents had a role in that story as well. I don’t even necessarily think this is something that jc only realised in the current timeline - i think it’s something he felt on some level this whole time, and it probably led to a lot of feelings of guilt - but the suibian reveal definitely puts it in sharp focus, and i think he’s now better equipped to handle this introspection than he was as a recently orphaned, traumatised teenager, lol. ANYWAY the window with the fabric is both a nod to the rider-waite design and a reference to the destruction of lanling - i actually did some basic ass research for this, and it seems that in ancient china fabric would indeed be hanged in a window if the normally used paper was damaged. The design of the window, as well as the very idea to use it to imply the reconstruction of lanling, was taken from this great piece of jc angst by my pal moroll1! Oh yeah also the covered window kind of works as a denial of forgiveness for jc because it’s like a halo but covered up... Also I completely forgot to put a blindfold over his eyes which would be perfectttt because blind justice and the core exchange......... ok moving on 12 the hanged man I always have issues with this card because i cant find a satisfactory summary of what it’s really about. Best i can tell it symbolises a need to hit pause, surrender or let go of something… ive also seen it tied to sacrifice? So mo xuanyu doesn’t fit perfectly, but sacrifice is definitely there in a surface level reading kind of way, and the idea that you have to surrender or let go in order to achieve your goal does fit the whole deal of getting revenge but giving up your life in exchange and not being there to see it 13 death This is probably one of my favourite cards, definitely not because I have huge issues with change or anything…. I see this card as signalling the necessity of change or putting an end to something / leaving something in the past in order to start anew? At first i considered putting past wwx, mxy and current wwx here as a kind of transformation and one cycle flowing into the next... But firstly, I’d already used mxy in the very previous card, so putting him in again would feel like overkill, and secondly, the longer I thought about it the less convinced I was that this would even fit with the card’s meaning? Because coming back from the dead doesn’t like... trigger an internal transformation within wwx or anything? Anyway, fun fact: the design I ended up going with was actually originally intended for judgement! I thought I was being very clever with the whole “figure plays an instrument and the dead rise” parallel, but apparently I’d just completely forgotten that the judgement card had a completely different composition... Truly I was boo boo the fool... But yeah anyway at the end of the day I figured the design would kind of work for death as well, with Wen Ning and the theme of transformation, (since in his case coming back as a fierce corpse does actually mark a certain transformation in behaviour) and Wei Wuxian’s protection of the Wen people essentially signifying an attempt to break the cycle of oppression if that makes any sense? Like, wwx is trying to revolutionise the way the world works a bit, if you catch my drift 14 temperance  The centrist card! Again this is probably going off track from the “official” interpretation, but to me this card has a certain “don’t commit fully; do everything in moderation; don’t take either side” flavour to it that i personally find infuriating irl and that i very much assign to lxc. It’s entirely possible that I’m misinterpreting his character because i didn’t really pay him (and the 3zun in general) much mind while reading, but hell, I’m allowed to pick favourites and choose who i want to interpret deeply vs shallowly. Again, i wish id chosen lqr for hierophant because its so annoying for a character i don’t care about to get two cards…. But oh well 15 the devil My alternative idea for this was jgy as the devil and lxc plus nmj as the figures, but since all three had been featured already (multiple times, even!) i figured I’d go with xy instead, especially since he’s among my faves lol. I think the devil signifies something along the lines of unhealthy attachment, obsession or addiction, which isn’t 100% accurate in the case of xxc and a-qing, but if i stretch it a bit to cover toxic relationships in general, and especially manipulation or negative influence, i don’t think it’s half bad. My main struggle here was to choose who amongst the xxc/sl/aq trio to choose for the human figures. 16 the tower Arguably jin zixuans death and the following massacre of nightless city were the final and most direct reason for the siege of burial mounds, and the tiger seal is good shorthand for wwx’s loss of control over his powers, which led to the deaths of jzx and jyl. When reimagining major arcana i like to feature some kind of building in this card (spoilers for a possible future project but in my rose of versailles major arcana set the tower is bastille) and even if it’s not a tower, the image of wwx looming over the gathered crowd from atop a rooftop is so good i couldn’t resist 17 the star Struggled with this one - considered both jin ling and lsz for it, as symbolising a hope for the future, but that was kind of covered by the world so it wouldn’t make sense to include here as well... As usual when I struggle with interpreting a card (as opposed to understanding it but struggling with matching a character to it, like with death or moon) I went to biddy tarot and read all the details about its meaning. What i got was that this card signifies an incoming period of introspection and inner peace following a time of turmoil, as well as a general moving on into a new, better phase of one’s life or finding new meaning and purpose. The figure also suggests someone vulnerable, but possessing a keen sense of intuition as well as a good degree of practicality and common sense. Given all those, I settled for mianmian because IM LOVE HER..... I also kind of see her as a prelude to the “just one person is enough” theme present in tgcf!! And i think her decision to abandon her sect because she saw the toxicity and corruption in it is a very inspiring action - even if it didn’t make a large visible impact, i think the appearance of her and her idyllic family at the very end of the novel - paralleling and mirroring wangxian - implies that at the end of the day, it was a meaningful one 18 the moon Another card i ALWAYS fuxking struggle with - this time less because i can’t grasp its meaning and more because I can never find a character that fits it well. I usually get fixated on the “dreams and subconscious” part, but if i lean more on the “disguise, deceit, anxiety and fear” part, i eventually figured the whole yi city arc wouldn’t be a bad fit. I say the entire arc because it really does encompass all those themes if you include both the past and the present - xue yang’s disguise, his tricks with the villagers, a-qing’s lies and even xxc’s reluctance to talk about his past as well as xue yang pretending to be xxc all fit the disguise and deceit angle, and the general mystery and creepiness of the current timeline yi city work well with the anxiety and fear - the mist, the slow uncovering of the past, even a-qing being revealed to be an ally after scaring the shit out of the protags. I definitely struggled with including all the elements and characters, and even moreso with making them vaguely fit the rider-waite composition, but i think it ended up okay ish. OH and i completely forgot to draw mist swirling around them :( 19 the sun I was considering mianmian’s family for this one, but since I used her for star, I ended up with wwx and his parents instead. Once again I’m reinterpreting the card a bit - normally I think it symbolises incoming times of pure happiness and abundance, as well as a connection with the inner child, but I gave it more of a nostalgic or sentimental twist - wwx looking back at the brief glimpse of his happy childhood. 20 judgement another card that i struggle to interpret a bit... Here i actually used the tgcf tarot zine as a reference! In it judgement is summarised as “rebirth, following duty, absolution” SO i figured that nhs, mxy and wwx all together would fit pretty neatly... wwx achieving (public) absolution through clearing his own name after being reborn, and nhs sort of calling on wwx to expose jgy’s crimes... It’s a bit messy but not bad I think! 21 the world This ties very closely to my read on mdzs as a story - which is that it’s, at the end of the day, largely about cycles, and about how hard it is to break them, but how we gotta keep trying and have hope anyway. Or maybe more precisely, that the people directly involved with and influenced by the trauma of the past might not be able to get over said trauma and that the hope for healing from it will be shouldered by the new generation. Or something like that… Basically what i mean is that jc and wwx and lwj and lxc and nhs and jgy and all these people who were in the thick of the sunshot campaign and the siege are so profoundly affected by it that it genuinely feels by the end of the story like there is little hope for them to ever truly overcome that trauma and build a better future without repeating the same old mistakes - but there is a glimmer of hope in the new generation, specifically in jl and lsz. And it’s a bit paradoxical, because they have also been directly impacted by the past tragedies - lsz having his entire clan wiped out after wwx failed to protect them, jl losing both his parents to wwx’s mistakes - but despite that loss, and despite coming from arguably the two opposing sides of the past conflicts, they are both, in the end, capable of moving past that tragedy, of recognising the complicated nature of those conflicts (jl’s moment of clarity at the end is both heartbreaking and hopeful) and forging friendships between clans in the process. I honestly think that the extra where jl is struggling to assert his authority as sect leader, to treat his subjects well and to cooperate with other sects in a truly amicable way is the single hopeful ending note for the larger themes of the novel - it allows us to imagine that maybe these kids can learn from the mistakes of their elders rather than getting sucked in by resentment at those mistakes, and actually build a brighter future for the cultivation world. And sidenote, this is also why i have a soft spot for jin ling and lan sizhui as a ship... speaking of which their poses were directly referenced from the lovers card ehehe

Looking back, I’d like to add some symbol of jin ling’s trauma so that it mirrors baby wen yuan in the tree stump... maybe his father’s sword? 

[robinisaghost]

animatic ideas :0 (ramble away, i would love to hear them!!)

mk thank you for enabling me, i will now be yelling

anyway

this is gonna be so obnoxiously long i am so sorry

can you add read more's on asks? eeeekkkk because this got so damn long lmao

mild dsmp spoilers obviously

this is the playlist, by the way

-im sorry boris (wilbur soot)

i think it would work really well with mmm slightly post lmanburg niki. andby slightly i mean. well when she leaves (that is the whole thing of the song gdfjkhgsdf) also side note at like 1 minute 11 on that song theres a discord notification really subtly in the background and it makes me paranoid every time i hear it. anyway god its such a nice song. even for just like. the end of lmanburg. not necesarily paired with a character, just the sense of leaving a place that was so highly populated before it got blown up twice and was like. the main part of the smp. yeah. anyway also the lines "they'll knock down the pubs before helping you...they'll let you jump under trains before helping you" yeah those four lines have big niki vibes but also i think the song could work well with exile tommy or actually even with the finale when tubbo is about to sacrifice himself? mmmmm yeah

-this is home (cavetown)

mmmm got exile tommy vibes innit. a lot of these have exile tommy vibes tbf i just like sad songs and also exile tommy. plus the song has a lot of like. the message is sort of like. changing yourself to appeal to others? like with "ill cut my hair to make you stare" but also the repeated thing of "ill figure out a way to get us out of here" which is clearly the main character of the song trying to help everyone when they are clearly not in a good way themself. yeah thats got big tommy vibes in general tbh but more like. pre finale tommy. i think he got a bit more independant after that.

-soldier poet king (the oh hellos)

ok this is self explanatory and has been done to death already but d a m n its kinda funky. anyway i had thoughts and actually started this but then lost motivation and deleted it all lmaooo. the only proof of its existance is a shitty storyboard in my draw which will hopefully never see the light of day again (unless anyone wants to see it :eyes:) anyway i had the thought of like. sbi? so soldier techno poet wilbur and king tommy. but tbf tommy and techno are kinda interchangeable with that, cos while techno is obviously the better fighter, tommy is used a lot, especially in lmanberg era and also i think he probably will be now that wilburs back

-pyjama pants (cavetown)

ok so i honestly dont remember why this is on the playlist but tbf this could go well with a bunch of characters. thinking like. phil and wilbur? or wil and tommy, or tubbo and ranboo are two that like. i know for a fact that i did not put the song on the playlist specifically for them but god thinking about it now it works so well with them

-boys will be bugs (cavetown)

OH BOY THERES A LOT OF CAVETOWN ON HERE HUH (i feel like that probably says something about me but shhhhhh we dont need to talk about that) ANYWAY

I think this could probably work really well with tommy? because of the whole like. trying really hard to come across as not caring about others, but really being like. very vunerable. but at the same time it could go really well with wilbur for the same reasons. also the song fucks ok cant deny it. to be fair i think it works better with tommy, because he's younger and also he really likes bugs (unless i am mistaken) which is just a cool coincidence but still)

-brother (kodaline)

FUCKKKKKKKKKKK THIS WORKS SO WELL WITH SO MANY CHARACTERS AND IS ALSO ***SO ANGSTY*** WHAT

anyway

i added it because of tommy and tubbo because holy shit, but also it could work very very well with wilbur and tommy, techno and wilbur, probably techno and tommy, and oh my god i just thought of this but this would work so well with phil and techno!!!! but yeah i originally thought tommy and tubbo because i thought it was a funny coincidence with exile tommy waking up underwater, and theres a line that says "if you were drowned at sea, id give you my lungs so you could breathe" and like. just thinking about the compasses especially. me gusta.

-feel better (penelope scott)

fundy. that is all.

no ok this works well with fundy but also probably karl sapnap and quackity, and also very much wilbur, like it works well with both. just mainly fundy idk why its got big fundy vibes tho. very poggers.

-as the world caves in (matt maltese)

ok but like this goes very very well with the explosions of lamberg. either of them. i think probably the first one is better, but i think it goes well with both. probably the first one, because it was way more emotional i think? cos it was the first time that their homes had been destroyed and everything, but also because it was so personal, because wilbur was the one who did it. i think that also it would work well if it was set during the explosion but also focussed on different facets? so like. one bit about wilburs perspective, one bit about tommys, one about phils, one about fundys maybe? idk just a bunch of lmaburg citizens' povs for this. its good. as the world caves in is a song that can be so gender tbh.

-do you hear the people sing? (les mis)

obvious obvious obvious...... but like..... also tbh it goes well with a bunch of things. like, mmmmm wilbur in pogtopia. the butcher army. lmaburg independance war (obviously ghdskj) but yeah. also this song just goes so hard like b r u h

-wolf in sheeps clothing (set it off, william beckett)

SO MANY OF THESE ARE LIKE. PRETTY OBVIOUS IF YOUVE HEARD THE SONG

but yeah. it would go so well with like. well any betrayal basically. so eret, from tommys pov maybe, or about wilbur from nikis pov, or wilbur from anyone pov tbf, or quackity from charlie/purpled/foolish/sams pov, or sam from tommys pov, really it works well with so many people which says a lot about the characters tbh but shhhhhhhhhhhh

-need you here (idkhow)

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

mk mk mk mk FUNDY AND WILBUR THO

like b r u h that works so well with them

also i started this one as well but didnt like it, theres a story board in my draw as well for it because like. oh my god its such a good idea i just am shit at animating and don't have a decent enough program :')

also also

the line "daddy has to go, and that makes me sad, but daddy will always come back, he promised" fuckkkkkk that works so well with like. say for example, idk, when they're celebrating schlatts death and wilbur leaves to press the button? the sheer fucking angst of that is enough to kill any one person istg that is in fact the entire reason why i started the animatic in the first place. just that line. also all the lines sung by the child voice. fuckin angsty as hell. also ust generally a banging song, as is every idkhow song

-green (cavetown)

another cavetown song huh. ok sure.

mk so wilbur and sally and fundy. like. for a start, the imagry of a fish at the start? boom sally.

anyway the lines "you looked so good in green, i hope you're well, and you look so good with him, (schlatt ig?) and I'm proud of you still (wilburrrr and fundyyyy) i miss your perfect teeth, i was too blunt, i hope you feel happy, that's all I want"

FUCKKKK

the whole song is about missing someone you used to love and only hoping the best for them!!!! and wishing that they are happy and safe!!!!!!!!!!! and hoping they still think about you!!!!! but even if they dont its fine because all you want is for them to be happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

-achilles come down (gang of youths)

OK I THOUGHT IT COULDNT GET ANGSTIER

so like. tw suicide but thats what the entire song is about and bing bang boom i just think it works so so so so so so so well with not only exile tommy (who obviously did try to kill himself) but also wilbur in a slightly more metaphorical way? so like. his self destructive habits leading him to a point where he had no choice other than to kill himself and to take his country down with him. and its all about other characters trying to help them and persuade them not to but also near the end there is a second voice trying to persuade them to go along with it, which im thinking like. if its wilbur, either dream or maybe just himself. his own brain persuading him to continue down the path that would inevitably lead to his and his countries destruction. also it works well with schlatt for the same reasons, except he doesnt want to die. maybe (since the song is so goddamn long) like. one verse for tommy one for wilbur and one for schlatt? dead gang poggg but also like. the verses cover fairly different things which work with one character but not so much the others, for example the first verse would be tommy because its mainly about persuading the person to not kill themself (which tommy did himself but shhh) the second for schlatt because its literally about drinking and smoking away your problems, and the third for wilbur since its more of a fight between the "good" and the "bad" sides, which is obviously what wilbur was experiencing. also obviously i have a soft spot for this song because its string instruments and french, basically my favourite combination ever (also i like his voice idfk lmao)

ANYWAY THATS ALL THE SONGS ON THERE SO FAR

i literally thought of another song while i was in the shower today but i dont remember which it was but a n y w a y the playlist will most definitely be getting longer, especially since there are so many more songs that are good for this but i just havent added them yet lmao. anyway ive been writing this for like an hour gsdfjhgdhfsg but still oh my god this was fun to write

[happinessinthedarkest-times]

avengers endgame reaction (spoilers!!!)

**if youre on mobile scroll fast bc idk if the keep reading works

holy shit holy shit fuck fuck fuck

i am an emotional wreak right now

ahhhhh it was so good im crying still

tony fucking stark my heart i guess ill start there 

tony stark i love you three thousand. he got his happy ending with morgan and pepper for 5 years they had 5 years together and he knew that the time heist (lol) would jeopardize that and he still went and helped

that scene where he had it out with steve at the beginning fuck my heart was breaking and i was crying .

i cried a lot in this movie. legit sobbing when nat died but ill get to that

that scene was everything i wanted it to be and perfectly executed. of course hes angry and lashing out because they were supposed to do it together and lose together and the emotion behind that ughh rdj killed it

he literally hands steve his heart the arch reactor

tony and howard ugh everything with them together. tony got closure with his dad 

everything tony was great. 

steve 

he got his happy ending. he got his dance with peggy (now im crying again) fuck. and he PICK UP MJOLNIR omg that scene was amazing and everything i never dreamed could happen when the hammer started moving ughhhh omg i was cheering so loud in the theatre and i dont normally do that. that whole scene ugh theres so much to react to

and he got to say assemble. 

ok now from the beginning. 

i started to cry literally before it even started. the screen was black and i was already tearing up but when clint and his daughter came up and then his family disappeared i was full on crying.

carol coming in clutch and saving tony and nebula yessss

steve and tony’s conversation right when he gets off the ship was everything i wanted it to be. (crying again) everything. 

when they go to thanos’s house thing and thor chops off his arm . its what ive been saying they shouldve done on titan 

and then he went for the head! 

five....... 

years later

fuck them. literally when the ‘five’ came up i was like no no no dont you dare do it dont you dare and then they did it. fuck them

five fucking years?!?! they made them live through 5 years of that trauma?!?!? 

nat was everything in this film. she became the leader and keeping track of everything and her moment of breaking down was just so human. she couldnt move on in those 5 years and it just shows how much the avengers had become her family. 

scott and cassie omg cassie all grown up made me so emotional 

tony and morgan i love you three thousand she is the cutest and sweetest thing 

tony fucking stark figured out time travel. he did that. 

when tony gives steve his shield back my heart could not take it

the scenes where they were trying to pinpoint the exact time to go back and it was like a sleepover sesh and all the domestic avenger fanfics 

going back a little bit

clint killing all the people that should have been killed and deserved to be killed and being a total badass showing up all those people who said he was just really good with an arrow and every scene he has with nat.

‘dont give me hope’

thor. oh where to start. he really did lose everything and he was blaming himself for all that happened so i get where hes coming from. every time you could see him remembering and tormenting himself about what happened broke me. his scene with his mother (crying again)

also hulk/bruce was an interesting choice (not a huge fan of it but ok) 

the time traveling

everything about the new york scenes were amazing. the aftermath of the end of the avengers, loki turning into cap for a second, seeing rumlow and sitwell come out, steve getting into the elevator and channeling that winter soldier energy (i was slapping my sister on the arm so hard at this part) hail hydra and outsmarting them all. cap fighting cap “i can do this all day” lmao i was dying ‘bucky is alive” again dying they really nailed it with this. i was worried beforehand because like it would change how we would see the og avengers but i still think it works

also can talk about how tony (and scott) was checking out steves ass????

“i forgot how that suit did nothing for you ass” (be still my heart) “i like to think of it at america’s ass” (or whatever the line was) 

loki getting away with the tesseract (is that in this timeline im confused about that hopefully someone will explain bc does that mean loki is alive in this timeline or not? lol)

them going back to the 1970s (do you trust me? i do) and tony meeting howard and introducing himself as howard potts. again i know i talked about howard and tony already but i loved their scenes. and JARVIS FROM AGENT CARTER MAKING AN APPEARANCE OMG

PEGGYYYYYYY (crying) when steve walked into her office (grabbed my sister again) and when he was watching her through the window and you could feel his pain. 

thor and rocket are the pairing that i never imagined but amazing none the less. i loved that we got the return of mjolnir here even though idk what that does to the timeline (again who knows at this point) 

rhodey and nebula again another pairing i didnt expect but are great together. everything about nebula in this film. she really has a great arch. i was stressing out so hard when the alternate timeline thanos found out that they came from the past. the scene where peter quill is dancing and singing to no music was great.

clint and natasha. this pairing thie duo the og. fuck my heart. when they started going off to vormir i knew. i knew it and i cannot handle it. the whole scene where they are fighting each other to sacrifice themself i was SOBBING. LEGIT SOBBING. ‘let me go’ i loved this so much and also hated it. she deserved her happy ending too. after everything she gave up everything to save those people. her arch is so good too. im excited for her origin. i kinda want to see her when shes a bad guy and killing everyone and her journey to shield. i hope thats what we’ll see in her movie. 

but also that scene emotionally fucked me up hard. 

the og avengers (minus nat) sitting on the edge of the lake 

thor trying to put on the glove and redeem himself (in his own eyes not my own bc he doesnt deserve the shit he gets for not going for the head)

hulk doing it and the calm before the storm where everything goes back before that missile comes firing down. 

steve tony and thor facing off with thanos. everything about this scene. tony getting a juice-up from thor and lightning to max out his powers. steve jump kicking on thanos’s ass. thanos beating up thor and steve coming in with FUCKING MJOLNIR AGAIN CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW MUCH I WAS CHEERING AT THIS POINT HE IS WORTHY MY BOY STEVE IS WORTHY

also on that note tony coming up to steve and saying “theres my man” or something and giving him back his shield again. 

steve standing there with his broken shield ready to face off with thanos’s army and sam coming in on the comm. and then EVERYONE COMING THRU AND KICKING NAMES AND TAKING ASS

legit cheering and crying so much 

valkyrie with her pegasus

shuri with her blasters 

peter parker and his reunion with tony was heartbreaking. tony looked so broken and complete at the same time. he got him back. 

PEPPER FREAKING POTTS 

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE (YEESSSSSSSS)

peter quill’s semi-reunion with gamora and how she doesnt know him but he gets her back

also gamora, nebula and still-evil!nebula was a great scene. nebula killing her past self is some symbolic shit right there AND to protect her sister who she hated

CAROL FUCKING DANVERS COMING TO SAVE THE DAY AND KICK THANOS’S ASS 

im sad that she wasn’t in the film as much but i get why they did it and it also makes me really excited for her future films

but carol getting the gauntlet and peter saying “i dont know how youre gonna get through that” 

and ALL THE BADASS MCU WOMEN COMING UP BEHIND HER READY TO FIGHT AND REPRESENT FOR THE FEMALES (CRYING) 

this is something that couldn’t of been done a few years ago because there weren’t a lot of female superheroes in this universe and just the fact that this scene can make such an impression and become probably one of the most badass scenes of the mcu is one of the best things that came out of this movie.

side note: ‘activate instant kill’ great callback 

and then we get to the sacrifice.

i knew it. i expected it. i read it in fanfics.

i was still not prepared. 

‘I am inevitable’

‘I AM IRON MAN’

FUCKKKKKKKK they really know how to write these movies. 

he knew he would die. he knew he would never see morgan again. but he knew what he had to do. 

his character arch from a selfish man to a selfless man has been the most profound and powerful story. 

rdj and tony stark have really carried this franchise. they were the start. and it makes sense that his death closes out this era of the mcu. 

to rdj: i will never forgive my mom for telling me that she didn’t like you way back when. that really influenced how i thought about you and about tony stark for years. and i limited me from really appreciating and loving iron man and those movies and tony’s character. but as i continued to watch more of you in the mcu and in real life and have seen how you have grown and who you are today, i have so much love and respect for you and your character. im just so upset at the time i lost where i could have fallen even more in love with you. thank you so much for everything you have done over the last 11 years for this franchise. thank you for the time thank you for the memories and the laughs. the journey has been amazing. 

the funeral scene with ‘proof that tony stark has a heart’ 

(also was the the kid from iron man 3 in the back?)

VALKYRIE BECOMING KING (queen? i say king but who knows) of new asgard. look at my killing baby all grown up and being the leader they need.

thor becoming a guardian basically. 

also was quill looking for his gamora? where was the gamora from this timeline on the ship? she wasn’t there in the scene so idk

also fighting with knives to see whos in charge lol

im glad people mentioned/mourned for nat too 

steve rogers 

steve.

i knew he wasn’t coming back.

bucky knew it too.

im wreaked

but at least he got his happy ending. he got his peggy (again idk what that does to her timeline) 

captain sam wilson america in the house.

(old steve looks like joe biden or is it just me lol)

they ended it with a steggy dance and kiss

it really was a perfect end to his story and it wrapped up his character really well. he got that life he deserved 

to chris evans: as this is probably the last time we will see you as captain america let me thank you too for the years and joy that you have brought to my life. youre it for me. you are the reason i became so invested in this world. when you jumped on the fake grenade i was in it with you. chris you are and will always be the best chris in my heart. your passion for this character and understanding of steve rogers and his motivations have created such a memorable performance. steve rogers will always be the og. he will always have my heart. i am so thankful that you took this opportunity and used it and made this character your own. you live up to the standards that steve holds for himself and i am so excited for your future. i am also so glad that you didn’t die in this movie bc i definitely could not have handled it if i had to watch both my favs die. i love you three thousand.

i literally cried throughout the whole movie. there were laughs, cheers, groans, stress, tears, and love throughout this film. i am so grateful that i am alive during this time in cinematic history. there will never be something as great or momentous as this film. a true culmination of 22 films. its never been done and i doubt itll ever be done again

i am also so impressed and amazed by how well this film turned out. it is just amazing how everything fell into place 

im sure ill read other people’s reactions and they will bring up points or problematic things that will taint my view on this movie but i dont want that to ruin my own experience

and for me, this was truly emotionally draining and fulfilling. the feeling of being in that theatre with all those people who love the characters as much as i do and experiencing this film for the first time is something i will never forget. 

people talk about how they remember lining up for star wars.

well i remember sobbing my eyes out when nat died, cheering along with everyone when cap picked up mjolnir and whipped thanos’s ass with it and when carol and the rest of the badass women of the mcu ready to kick ass, crying with everyone as the light went out in tony’s chest and eyes, watching as history was made in front of our eyes.

and the end credits with the og avengers getting recognition with their photos and autographs. 

i love this franchise and these films and these characters i dont know who i would be without them. 

one last thing

thank you to the og avengers. steve tony thor nat clint bruce. chris robert chris scarlett jeremy mark. you will always have a special place in my heart. you were there at the start. you were the reason this all could happen you were the reason i became so invested in these movies. you brought these characters to life and embodied them. you are all so much like your characters the casting is perfect. thank you for your dedication to your work to you fans and to your characters. it means so much that you all stuck through this together and that you are such great friends in real life and i can only hope that one day i can be so lucky as to meet you all and thank you in person. 

[dazingsky]

Late for class (Reddie)

HELLO!!! so this is super late, and quite short but i needed to write something ughguihr! my school trip was awful but im back!!

Summary: (modern au) Eddie forgets his books, and the love of his life is kind enough to go and get them for him

Words: 1,552

Also please leave me requests!!! I love getting requests and it really helps me with what to write because i only have like two ideas left lmao

But enjoy this!!!! I didnt proof read cause im too tired, so im sorry if its a flop!!!

Eddie Kaspbrak was always a bundle of nerves. Maybe it was the way he was raised. That was probably it. HIs mother was a complete psychopath, so it made sense that he was a bundle of nerves. The day that Eddie decided he would tell Richie he loved him, he was the biggest bundle of nerves, in the world. At least that’s what he felt like.

He woke up that morning, full of dread for the day ahead. He had given himself a pep talk the night before, persuading himself that it was a good idea. He had called Bill, and whined down the phone to him for around an hour. Bill had hung up in the middle of Eddie talking, after shouting down the phone about how he needed sleep.

Eddie had gotten dressed slowly, picking out his favourite pale pink jumper, and black skinny jeans. He was just putting his pastel purple vans when his mother called him down for breakfast. He felt his pulse quicken, as he checked his hair in the mirror, slipped his phone in his pocket, and grabbed his bag.

Forty minutes later he was stood at his locker, beside Beverly, who was talking about Ben. She was basically gushing about how sweet he was, and how lovely his personality was. Eddie was only half listening, and only slightly nodding along.

His thoughts were purely consumed by thoughts of Richie. He was desperately trying to think of what to say to him. How to open up to him. He was even trying to imagine Richie’s reaction. What would he do?

Eddie’s thoughts were interrupted by the bell ringing loudly, and dragging him out of his thoughts. Beverly grabbed Eddie’s arm and guided him down the hall towards their homeroom, continuing to gush about Ben. Eddie continued to think.

Eddie sat at the back of his homeroom, in his usual seat, yawning quietly. He had been so deep in thought he didn't even notice Richie walk in, until he was sat down beside him, muttering a quiet, “Morning, Eds”, under his breath.

Eddie turned to look at Richie, taking in his appearance. He was wearing his black hoodie, with an old nirvana t-shirt under it. He was also wearing ripped, black, skinny jeans, and beat up, old black vans. His hair was curly, and slightly messy, and Richie was wearing his contact lenses. Eddie always thought he looked cuter in his glasses.

Richie had began dressing in mostly black, and mostly band t-shirts, around the same time that Eddie started wearing pastel colours, and putting flowers in his hair. They looked like polar opposites. But they were still the same people as they were when they first met. Their personalities never seemed to change.

“Morning.” Eddie murmured, playing with his hands.

“You okay, Eddie Spaghetti? You seem sad this morning.” Richie said, looking at Eddie, closely. “Oh shit, did you see me sneaking out of your mom’s room this morning?”

Eddie rolled his eyes at the joke. “Shut up, I'm just tired.” Eddie shrugged, opening his bag to get his school journal out. “And don’t call me that.”

“Relax, Ed’s, I’m just teasing you.” Richie watched Eddie, running a hand through his hair. “What’s wrong..?” Richie asked, after he noticed Eddie beginning to panic.

“I forgot to get my books from my locker. I was talking to Bev instead, and I completely forgot to actually get my books.” Eddie’s hands seemed to be shaking, and he didn’t know how to stop them. “I’m gonna be late for class. Miss Clarkson’s gonna kill me.”

“What’s your locker code?” Richie asked quickly. Eddie looked at him, his face covered in confusion.  “I’ll get your books, what’s the locker code?” Richie asked again.

“Then you’ll be late for class..” Eddie said slowly.

“I don’t care about that type of thing, Ed’s.” Eddie bit his lip, writing his locker code down, and handing it to Richie. Richie gave him a small smile, and as soon as the bell went, he was gone.

Eddie grabbed his own bag, getting up slowly, and walking out of the room, with Beverly, once again. They walked to class, in silence, which Eddie was actually thankful for. He wanted to be alone, in his head, with his own thoughts.

They took their usual seats, in Miss Clarkson’s class. Beverly sat at the front, beside Ben and Bill. Eddie sat at the back, beside Richie, who hadn’t arrived yet. He took his seat slowly, opening his bag and taking out his pencil case, and his notebook. He looked around, as the room began filling up, his eyes falling upon the door. He was desperate for Richie to just walk through it, holding his book, and grinning.

Eddie waited patiently, hoping Richie could sleep in before Miss Clarkson turned around. But she did, clasping her hands together, her eyes scanning the room. She sighed, clearing her throat, as she stared at Richie’s empty seat. “Where is Mr Tozier?”

“Here!” Richie said, quickly, stumbling into the class. “I was talking to my homeroom teacher!” Miss Clarkson eyes him slowly. She was suspicious. But she sighed, giving up.

“Just take your seat Mr Tozier. Don’t be late for my classes again.” Miss Clarkson waved her hand toward his seat, turning back the the board. Richie hurried down to his seat, sliding into into the chair, and pulling his backpack into his lap, as Miss Clarkson began teaching the class.

Two books landed on Eddie’s desk. He looked over at Richie, who had a bright grin on his face, and Eddie almost melted into his seat. He didn’t know what came over him, but his thoughts were flooded by the fact that Richie would risk getting in trouble just so Eddie wouldn’t. Eddie had no idea what he was doing when he opened his mouth. His mind was too full.

“I love you.” The words tumbled out of Eddie’s mouth before he could stop them. Richie’s eyes widened in shock at the same time as Eddie’s did. They both stared at each other for a second, before Eddie turned back, to face the front of the room.

His entire face had gone red, and he couldn’t bare to look at Richie. He simply opened his book, and attempted to catch up with the class. But his mind was racing, and his pulse was quickening. Eddie played with his hands, fidgeting. He felt sick. He felt like he was going to be violently ill. But he pulled through, attempting to pay attention to the class.

As soon as the bell rang, Eddie sprang out of his seat, dragging his bag behind him. He wanted to race to his next class, and hopefully avoid Richie for the rest of the day. But just as he was joining a crowd, in the hallway, which was shuffling towards their next classes, when a hand grabbed his arm, dragging him to the side.

He turned with wide eyes, to shout, until he realised it was Richie. He attempted to pull his arm away, but Richie tightened his grip, pulling him into an empty classroom, and closing the door quickly, locking it. Eddie sighed loudly, turning to him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to just.. Just spring that on you..” Eddie said slowly, looking down. He felt stupid, and uncomfortable. He ran a hand through his hair, quickly, glancing up at Richie.

“You’re not wearing flowers in your hair today.” Richie observed. He seemed oddly calm. HIs hands were shoved in his pockets, and he was leaning against an empty table.

“I didn’t have time..” Eddie shrugged, shoving his own hands in his pockets.

Richie stood up straight, pulling his bag off his shoulder and unzipping it. He leaned down, reaching into his bag. Eddie watched him, curiously. Richie stood up after a second, holding whatever he had gotten out of his bag behind his back.

“Close your eyes.” Richie ordered. Eddie stared at him for a second, opening his mouth to protest, but Richie cut him off. “Do it.” Eddie huffed, covering his eyes with his hand. He heard Richie walk closer to him, and he held his breath, unsure of what Richie was going to do. He felt something get placed on his head, and he immediately pulled his hands away from his eyes, putting them on his head.

“Did you just put a handmade flower crown on my head, Rich?” Eddie rose an eyebrow. Richie blushed slightly, looking down.

“Beverly taught me how to make one.” He explained, shrugging slightly.

“Why’d you wanna make one?” Eddie questioned, watching Richie.

“So I could give it to you when I told you I loved you.” Eddie’s breath hitched in his throat, as Richie said it. He opened his mouth, attempting to say something, but no words came out of his mouth.

His mind was still attempting to process what Richie said, when Richie grabbed Eddie’s cheek, and pulled him into a soft kiss. Eddie kissed back immediately, melting into Richie’s touch. He felt his entire body relax. Every thought he had was gone.

Richie pulled away slowly, leaning his forehead on Eddie’s. “I love you.” He stated, staring into the shorter boys eyes.

“I love you too.” Eddie said, pulling Richie into another kiss.