#i didnt even notice until someone pointed it out
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gem-de-lune · 1 day ago
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Flash Reading: SM's Statement on Seunghan
No intro lesgo aorry if there is any typos this was a very emotion heavy read and all the members are freaking tf out.
READ THE VIBE CHECK 11/15 PRIOR TO THIS READING FOR CONTEXT: HERE
How does Riize feel/what are they doing?
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Do you recognize this Page of Cups? Yes. This was literally just in my Full Moon Reading regarding how this Moon was affecting Riize or rather their ultimate interaction with SM. They are going to make their emotions and intentions on this matter very very clear probably unexpectedly on SM's side. The 7 of Swords indicates they were blindsided, and the 10 of swords in this deck indicate they are overwhelmed with this feeling of being "put down". Idk how to describe this perfectly but it's like when you are so full of absolute outrage all you can do is stomp over to the person and literally seethe as you feel like you are being ignored.
How does Seunghan feel?
The Moon + Strength + The Hermit
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Does he want this?
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The Devil
Bro wants to hide away completely. He isnt sure what to feel. He was not blinsided here and he knew. But in classic Libra fashion he has been told what his options are and wanted to see if he could try. He is regretting it already knowing what he will have to do all alone by himself. He does not want to be a soloist. He is scared. He is barely managing to keep himself subdued. As I read this i am almost tearing up. He tried lying multiple times during the reading and If you read the way I do for individuals you know what I mean because you end up feeling what they are feeling physically and the cards don't make sense.
Anyways, he is so so so low in confidence rn. He at a point felt like it was kind of SM to even offer a solo debut, but now he knows its really a death sentence and strategy they are using to save Riize. He wants to help Riize, but he also did not want this outcome. I am so so sick to my stomach reading this bc he is so so sad and so so riddled with anxiety and fear of not knowing what will happen.
What will SM do in Response?
Knight of Swords
Extra pulls that flew out when asking for clarification and if their statement would be retracted
The Magician (flew) + King of Cups (fell out and didnt notice until i move my hand)
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Recognize this Knight again? Yes this is the card pulled in Vibe Check for the full moon saying swift action will be taken. With the Magician and King of Cups we are seeing someone with the power and tools to do so taking action on the matter. With the King of cups we are actually seeing an ounce of empathy and understanding on a fundamental level (shocking).
But the fact that the Page of Cups for Riize and the Knight of Swords for SM literally showed up here is NOT a coincidence. It means this is all a part of the plan to turn things around unexpectedly.
Bottom of the deck:
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The High Priestess
YALL IDK HOW CLEARER I CAN BE
She is saying to trust your intuition and follow that path with every ounce of your being. My intuition is telling me this isn't the end and the truth, and what is right will prevail. There is absolutely no better indication of that than the Priestess. If you have any ounce of intuition you KNOW what is happening right now and you KNOW what is right. Follow that feeling.
This is not the end. SM is trying to console people because they SEE the numbers, and they don't like it. This is the sale pity party prize they gave Lucas. I, for one, have had enough of their antics. This is where it stops. Do. Not. Fall. For. This.
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sleepydrupe · 1 year ago
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rgb siblings!!
i loved drawing this sm i feel like the more i draw ninjago the more my art has been improving !!! i wanna draw more of the ninja too besides. cole and kai LOL gotta give the others some more love <33 and if any of y'all ever have any requests feel free to ask!! i can't promise i'll get to them but i will definitely try :')
oh and here's the reference photo i used (found off of pinterest)
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molynomials · 9 months ago
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very smooth, ryoji.
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spacedlexi · 4 months ago
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Kenny and Violet anon here YES.
Violet is upset because someone she defended against her found family of 8 years let her get taken by brainwashing adults for 2 seconds and everyone flips their lid.
But Kenny refuses to stop a train, and gets into a whole fight with Lee over it (AND REFUSES TO HELP YOU FIND A LOST LITTLE GIRL WHILE YOU’RE FIGHTING OFF AN INFECTION, where as Violet always defends you in Episode 1 regardless of whether you ignored and/or antagonized her or not), and gets mad at an 11 year old for not being able to handle helping someone in labor by herself and everybody’s like “Nah it’s okay, his family died years ago so he gets to do whatever he wants.” as if Violet didn’t witness one of the only consistent family members in her life die in front of her 💀
There’s so many comparisons I could make and one day I’ll make a Venn Diagram about all of their similarities but for now I’m glad someone pointed this out.
there are some things kenny does that have No excuse (like refusing to help bitten lee look for missing clem all because hes mad you didnt side with him enough. leaving lee to singlehandedly save himself in the pharmacy because he got scared. threatening to slap clem for blaming herself for lees death. off the top of my head). but his behavior on the train is annoying yet understandable. he doesnt want to admit his son is dying and he feels like duck dying in the first place is his fault for not saving shawn. you can convince him to stop without things getting physical
the Problem comes in when people can understand and sympathize with kennys annoying/shitty actions, but when it comes to violet (who has the same "my family is dead and its made me bitter and closed off" backstory (and her whole arc is about learning to love and care again)), suddenly all understanding goes out the window. even tho shes not even a FRACTION as annoying and shitty as kenny can get 😭😭
violet is mean to clem for the One scene where youre introduced to her (ignoring your first moment with her in the courtyard where shes smiling at clem so you already know her shitty attitude later is a lie. louis even defends her. wingman lol. and depending on what you say in response to her you can Immediately see the regret on her face LOL). but before the scene even Ends shes complimenting clem and clem loves it. then youre forced to talk to her and tenn about the twins, you have a nice card game where you can joke around with her, then she shows up at the dorm and they have a nice heart to heart about how theyre BOTH struggling with the loss of people theyve loved, and they can sympathize about both being harsher than they intend (THEY GET EACH OTHER CANONICALLY)
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and vi not being "a people person" is a huge part of her arc?? she doesnt like that shes like this 😭 but shes also better with people than she gives herself credit for and its why she makes a good leader. (and even if you pick the "came off strong" option clem is OBVIOUSLY teasing about it but vi cant tell and gets defensive ("its not like im trying to be bffs or whatever. sorry" is so "you want to kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid" of her)
and then after this shes never mean to clem again?? (unless you antagonize her but even then its mostly just about her standing her ground and not taking shit she doesnt deserve. which is fair). shes only mean to brody while fishing (and shes mean to brody because deep down she blames HERSELF) and the whole POINT of that scene is to try and mend their broken relationship which immediately makes vi a happier/nicer person if you do (also interesting how louis doesnt get any shit for His behavior while hunting 🤨 no hes just cool and fun). violet also apologizes for being "weird" in the dorms the previous night as well (bby girl why are you afraid that everything you do is weird 😭 she says that word a lot)
violet will Always have clems back (in EP1 and 2!!) No Matter What you do or say to her. i think people take her loyalty for granted. so if you dont save her in EP2 and expect to continue to have her unwavering loyalty in EP3? thats a You problem. she is Fucked Up mentally on that boat by lilly and her not-exactly-ex, and then gets caught in the explosion she didnt want anything to do with. AND THEN SHE APOLOGIZES because she recognizes she was WRONG
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(not her literally trying to make a joke about it to ease the tension 😭 people dont give her credit for also having a sense of humor. like louis is the only one who cracks jokes around here) but again when it comes to kenny his actions are understandable and defendable even without an apology 🙄 i literally side with kenny on Everything except the larry thing and if you dont make the right dialogue choice with him? he will not help you look for clem. because of larry 😐 i killed your son for you bro and then took care of his walker doppelganger so you didnt have to. and this isnt even touching his behavior in S2. and yet despite everything he does hes still one of the most beloved characters in the fandom 🤨
i just have to remind myself sometimes that all vi options were made 53-61% and the vi haters are a loud minority. her always being above 50% is so interesting to me because i love when choices are split perfectly 50/50. but the way the fandom talks about her (and the women in general) you wouldnt think shes technically the more popular option (and i Hate playing the popularity card its so annoying, but im only doing it bc people also say shit like "maybe if vi wasnt so mean more people would pick her" they DO pick her!!! you just got mad she was mean for 5 seconds, never payed attention to her again, and used her determinate reaction on the boat as justification for not liking her 😑) (also ignores how mean louis gets in EP2 regardless of choice?? but like kenny His actions are defendable and sympathetic and hers arent 🙄)
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gay-pirate-anime · 1 year ago
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they did, imo, a perfect job for character design. everyone is still very fun and colourful, theyre wearing clothes similar to canon material, but also slightly redesigned to be more practical.
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hopefullyababe · 2 years ago
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starting to belive that statistic about college students putting on weight while living on campus. having unrestricted access to unlimited ammounts of preprepared food has not done wonders for my weight let me tell you.
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themmatennant · 5 months ago
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kinda spoilers for season finale!
i just finished the legend of ruby sunday and im just gonna say, thats not how i thought that episode was gonna go
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arolesbianism · 7 months ago
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Y'know there already is such a nonexistent market for oni art in general so the fact that I wanna draw more au art is killing me. Like I draw for fun and don't need notes to be happy with a piece but also I need ppl to view my art and be curious and ask questions because while I may not desperately need approval I do desperately need excuses to gush abt the things I like
#rat rambles#oni posting#Im thinking abt the rabbit au clones again#in particular the two main nails clones I love them sm theyre so silly#we have guy shaking and crying while internally actually being rly relieved and guy smiling and laughing while being plagued by the Horrors#I should probably give them nicknames but idk what would work best#but yeah the older one is the one whos chip got damaged and is stuck pumping them full of stimulants and hasnt slept in 3 months#and the younger one has been spending the past three months spending day and night at gravitas working their ass off#it wasnt until they got hit by a rly intense wave of fatigue that they were finally pushed into actually going home to rest#at which point the older one was like yo whats up I didnt expect that to actually work lol#things are initially very chaotic after that since younger nails just found out a Lot and older nails didnt rly have a plan for this#they were basically just finishing up a project a past nails clone started since they had nothing better to do#at first it was because they were hoping it could maybe disable their own malfunctioning chip but as the days turned into weeks they#swiftly realized that even if it could disable their chip its probably already far too late for that to save them#and even if the months of no sleep didnt basically instantly take them out there would still be a half broken neural chip in their brain#which likely already had caused complications that they just havent noticed because of the everything else going on#so while they still finished up the project it became a much more half hearted ordeal that they honestly werent expecting to work#but evidently it did leading to the awkward experience of explaining to someone that they're a clone#younger nails hadnt necessarily suspected anything to that degree but they had noticed that smth was off#which is part of the reason they spent so much time working in an attempt to ignore it#so the revelation actually helped somw things click into place and while it wasnt good news by any means it was kind of a relief in a way#not in the sense that now they are in active danger of dying at any time but yknow#they both die eventually ofc but yknow at least they get to be povs of sorts#I mean not much they could do to do anything abt their situation even if one of them wasnt basically doomed to slowly die already
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edgelite · 1 year ago
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if my assumptions are correct mox was meant to retain but they called an audible and changed the finish after he got knocked out for real. sad face
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aciddrattboyy · 1 month ago
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found it hard to find someone like you
suna finds out you've never had an orgasm before and takes it very personally
suna x f! reader ☆ smut ☆ wc: 1.9k cw: cunnilingus, fingering (f!receiving), squirting [all characters are aged up!] a/n: this is an old fic i actually didnt even remember existed until i opened google drive and found it in my suna rintaro folder when i went to go write another fic, so i offer this one to you all now as i write what i planned
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“are you for real,” suna whipped his gaming chair around to face you. his eyes wide with a faint blush on his cheeks that had been there since the start of this conversation. 
“i mean yeah i guess, i’ve had sex before but i don’t think i’ve ever came y’know? and i’ve tried masturbating but it gets frustrating and i eventually just give up,” you laid on your stomach on suna’s bed, legs swinging back in forth in the air as you played a video game on your phone. 
both you and suna had absolutely no idea how the conversation led to sex but it didn’t seem out of the normal. you for one werent phased, casually humming as you jammed your thumbs against your phone screen. your humming only stopped when you felt suna’s eyes boring into you. 
“... what?” you looked up at him, one of your eyebrows raised slightly as your eyes flicked between your phone and him. suna’s mouth opened and closed multiple times but nothing came out. with a small laugh you sat up, pausing your game. “what is it?” 
“oh uh,” he shook his head, trying to will his now half hard dick to calm down before it became noticeable. “nothing- nothing i just think thats crazy…” he was absolutely floored and a bit upset that a person like you never got to have pleasurable sex. “so uh… do you just… fake it then when you know…” the minute the words left his mouth he regretted it, feeling mildly embarrassed at the fact that he was getting hard just from a conversation about sex that involved you.
you cock your head to the side as if you were really thinking about it, a light laugh leaving your mouth,
“yeah i guess so- i mean i don’t think i’ve ever outright lied and said i was having an orgasm i guess they just assumed i did. pretty funny isn’t it,” you were giggling as you picked up your phone to start your game again. 
“thats so fucked,” you snapped your head back up to look at him when you heard what sounded like pure anger and disbelief come out of suna’s mouth. his blush was a little darker now, eyebrows nearly touching as he tried to imagine how disappointing it must feel in the moment. you shrug your shoulders, laying on your back and turning your attention back to your game.
“nah it’s all good i don’t really expect anything when having sex so it doesn’t really bother me,” your voice was way too nonchalant for suna as he tried to understand how you could be so unbothered about that. 
“you deserve to feel good,”
“well i haven’t been able to find someone to make that happen yet,” you and suna lock eyes in that moment. time seemed to have stopped at that point. your eyes flit to his mouth as his tongue swiped over his bottom lip. suddenly the air seemed very hot with tension so thick  you could cut it with a knife. seconds went by and it felt like a thousand unspoken words were getting communicated between the two of you.
in the same moment you were sitting up on the bed, suna was rising from his chair. soon enough he was crawling onto the bed, knees knocking into yours as your back landed on the mattress as he pressed his lips against yours.                                                                                                                                                                      
your arms immediately wrapped around his neck. pulling him down on top of you. his lips moved messily against yours as he snaked a hand between your bodies. you shivered when you felt his hand slide under your shirt and up your torso. the small noise that left your lips was enough to egg suna on, moving his hand higher up until he was cupping yourtit, swiping his thumb over the now hardening bud.  
you were enjoying the way he was taking his time with you, keeping his lips against yours as his hand explored the skin under your shirt. you found yourself growing hot, wanting him to touch you more. so you roll your hips against suna, eliciting a small moan from him that was muffled by your kissing. 
“be patient pretty girl,” he mumbled against your lips before traveling down to place wet kisses on your neck and explored collarbone. “ ‘m gonna make you feel good just be patient for me,” his voice was husky as he spoke against your neck, his other hand now traveling down to cup you through your pants. you shakily nodded your hand, a bit overwhelmed with how you good were already feeling just because of some small touching. 
you seem to stop breathing for a moment when you felt his hand travel back to push your shirt up until it bunched just above your boobs. in an instant, suna’s mouth was latched onto one, tongue swirling around the nipple as he used his hand to play with the other one. you were whining under him, breathing heavy as you squeezed your thighs together in an attempt to make any sort of friction.
suna continued his movements for a moment before letting his mouth off your boob with a small ‘pop’, a hazy smile present of his face as he looked up at you. just the sight alone had you clenching around nothing. he began to press kisses into your sternum, your ribs, your stomach, occasionally stopping to make sure a mark would stick to your skin. 
you sat up slightly, leaning back on your elbows when you felt suna’s mouth press one finally kiss onto the area of your stomach just above the waistline of your pants. he looked up at you with that same smile as he tugged on the material and pulled it down. you helped him, eagerly shrugging them off because you desperately wanted suna to be back between your legs. 
soon enough he was, licking and sucking at the skin of your inner thighs. his arms were under your thighs, hands wrapping around to hold your hips in place.
“rin-.” you whine when you felt him press a feather light kiss right above the edge of your underwear, a slight tremble coursing through your body when you felt him press a finger into the wet patch of your panties. he hummed in response, licking over the wet patch tentatively.
“that feel good?” he looked up you while he spoke, his fingers moving to grab the hem of your underwear and pulling them down. you nodded dumbly, your attention being almost completely on the feeling of his breath fanning over your now naked cunt. “you have to tell me what feels good and what doesn’t okay? ‘m gonna make you cum tonight baby,” you nodded again, hips twitching like your cunt was begging for him to eat you out.
“okay okay- just please- oh shit,” suna was quick to swipe his tongue along your slit, fanning his hand out on your lower stomach and using this thumb to lift the hood before just barely grazing over your throbbing clit. your hips jerked at the sudden jolt of pleasure, a small gasp leaving your lips. suna continued to kiss at your clit as he glided his middle finger against your slit. your thighs twitched, threatening to snap close any moment but suna didn’t seem to mind. his eyes flicked back up to you as he slowly pushed his finger inside, dick twitching immediately when he felt you clench around his fingers and thought how it would feel to have you clenching around his cock instead. his pace was slow, tenderly fucking his middle finger into you as you continued to let out a string of soft whines.
 “use your words y/n tell me how you feel,” his mouth hovered just above your cunt and you could see a sheen of your juices over his lips. your face grew warm as he waited for you to tell him. 
“ ‘s good- feels good,” you said quickly. you could hear suna laugh and before you could snap at him you were whining instead as he lowered his mouth on you once more. 
he wrapped his lips around your bundle of nerves, causing you to jerk your hips up onto his mouth. he slipped his finger out before immediately adding another one in. his middle and ring finger curled inside of you as he pumped them in and out. you threw your head back as he hits that sweet spot inside of you, an embarrassing whine coming from lips as he continued to press into it. 
“th-that feels good- right there- ah-,”  you hand reaches out to grab onto suna’s hair, forcing him to keep his mouth on your clit as he fucked you with his fingers. sun’a half closed eyes widened at the unexpected tug on his hair. looking up at you he almost came in his shorts at the sight. you looked completely fucked out, eyes screwed closed as tears being to cling onto your lashes and mouth opened slightly as soft moans left your lips. 
he flattened his tongue, letting you grind your clit against it while he continued to fuck his fingers into you at a brutal pace. he let his eyes close, all his attention on the sounds of pleasure you were making just because of him. 
when he felt you clench around his fingers he pushed both fingers deep into your hole as he began to curl and uncurl his inside you at an insane pace that you curling for into him, 
“w-wait rin- ah- i have to- have to pee-,” you squealed, squirming against suna’s mouth as you tried to warn him. but he kept going. switching his tongue with his hand. he rubbed at your clit eagerly as he plunged his tongue inside of you.
suna let out a long groan against your cunt when he felt you squirt against his mouth. your juices immediately splashed his lower face as he took his tongue out of you before letting it hang out of his mouth, watching your hole clench around nothing. 
“ thats it baby,” he rasped, leaning forward to press his now cum glazed lips onto yours. his mouth caught your loud moans as he continued to abuse your clit, circling it with his fingers as your lower body convulsed against him. 
“rintaro- i-it hurts-,” you lower your hand between your bodies to push his hand away. if suna was mean he would keep going and fuck you dumb until you cant take anymore. but he was nice and considering it being your first one, he wanted to treat you. so he changed his pace, swallowing your whines with his tongue as you twitched against his slowing fingers. 
taking his fingers out of you, he moved over your body, pressing his lips into you and swallowing your some moans that were just sending blood straight to his dick. you watched as suna brought his fingers up to his mouth, keeping his eyes on you as he licked them clean before pressing his lips back onto yours. you whined, tasting yourself on your tongue while you explored his mouth. when he pulled away once more you were met with a shit eating grin. 
“so i’m guessing it felt good,” he cocked his head to the side as he spoke and you were just about ready to push him away before you noticed that the sheets below you were wet. 
“fuck off,” you tried to pretend to be angry as you playfully shoved his shoulder. he held a hand up in surrender, batting his eyelashes as he tried to appear innocent.
“i’ll take it as a yes.”
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i hope you enjoyed !! reblogs/comments are very much appreciated <3
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i-cant-sing · 3 months ago
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Time Traveller AU part 11
Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here. Part 8 is here. Part 9 is here. Part 10 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
Part 12 is here!
Your eyes are closed as you travel through time and space, wondering where you'll end up this time. Surely, if the universe saved you one more time, it means you'll probably end up in a better place-
Your eyes snapped open at the loud sound of thunder. You're staring up at the sky, dark clouds lightening flashing across it and-
I'm still falling!
You're not able to breathe until you take a gasp just as you hit the ground below you-
Wet. No, not ground. You look around in the dark water, not able to visualise anything before adrenaline kicks in and you start to swim to the surface.
You gasp as you come up and look around you.
You're in the sea. You're in the middle of the sea!
Your heart is drumming against your chest as you look up at the sky. Its dark, filled with heavy cloud and thunder. As the waves around you begin to move, your blood runs cold.
Storm. Sea storm.
Before you're able to react, though you doubt you could've prepared yourself, the waves crash down on you, pulling you back under the waters. No matter how hard you try to come back up, the waves thrash you here and there, insistent on drowning you. Even if you're able to break the surface for a few seconds, you're only able to take in so much air before getting waterboarded by the sea.
You're thrashing about under the waters, your body starting run out of adrenaline and reaching exhaustion, when you spot something in the corner of your eye.
Its a dark, huge figure. Horizontal, streamlined-
Shark. Its a fucking shark!
You'd scream if your body would listen to you. But you froze, and for some reason, your mind went on autopilot and made you raise your fists.
What? Fight the shark? What the fuck Y/n-
The shark was less than 5 feet from you when an orca came out of nowhere and attacked the shark.
You could only watch as the two sea animals fought each other, the killer whale clearly winning as the shark's thrashing began to subdue. That was the last thing you saw before losing consciousness, praying to God someone finds your body at least.
-
You wake upto the sound of a woman screaming.
Screaming. So, I must be in hell. Huh.
Your eyes flutter open and you look around the large white room you're in.
Its a hospital ward.
Your gaze falls on the shrieking female patient, currently being strapped to her bed as nurses try to inject her with something.
"Oh, you're awake." A nurse states as she comes by your side, noticing the English accent. "Didnt think you would after they found you washed up on the shore. You were shivering all over!"
Ah, nearly drowned. Nearly had hypothermia. Maybe I should have a "near-death" board.
You cleared your throat. "Where am I? How long was I out?"
"You're in London, honey. It was the nearest hospital from where'd they found you. You've been here for a day." She watched you sit up. "Where you from, dearie?"
Pressing your temples, you answered. "Just... around."
Her face turned somber. "You're one of those, arent you?"
"One of who?" You narrowed your eyes at her. "One of who?"
"One of the damned who spread their filth-!" She snarled, stopping when she saw a doctor come up. "Hello, Dr Lowe!" The doctor merely gave her a nod, his eyes fixed on you. "And how are you, miss-?"
"Y/n." Whats the point of lying with another name? Its not like they'd find a record of you.
"Miss Y/n." He nodded. "Do you remember what happened? Why you were on the beach?"
"Um..." You tried to come up with an excuse. "I think... I was trying to swim."
Dr Lowe raised a brow. "Swim? In the winter?"
"Mmhm. Better to prepare myself for the summer." You feigned a smile, not receiving one back.
"Why?" The nurse asked, shrinking when the doctor shot her a glare.
"For... for fun?" You answered, unsure. What, is swimming a crime here?
"And you were swimming in... these clothes." You look down, noticing you were still in the Ottoman attire, wearing a flimsy gown.
"I was rehearsing for a play." The lie rolled out easier this time.
"Are you married?"
"No." I just escaped several attempts though. "Are we done here? I need to get home."
"And where would that be?" The doctor asked, crossing his arms as he looked at you.
"Outside of London. I dont feel comfortable telling you the address." You answered, not appreciating his interrogation.
"Miss, do you know what day it is today?" Shit.
"No. I have never been good at remembering dates." You pull the sheets off you to get off the bed but the doctor's words stop you.
"Its 8th of October."
And this is where you made a stupid mistake.
"What year?" The question came out before you could think of the repercussions.
"You... dont remember the year?" The doctor and the nurse shared a look before looking back at you.
"1860."
1860. 1860. London-
Victorian era.
Shit.
"Of course, I remember the year. I was just making sure. Anyways, I have to go-"
"You're not going anywhere, miss. You're not well. You need treatment." The doctor grabs your shoulders, pushing you back down.
"No, no. I am all good now! You saved my life, but I need to go-" You tried to push his hands off your shoulders, watching the nurse leave in a hurry.
The doctor shook his head. "No, miss. You may be fine physically, but not mentally." "What?" "You dressing up like this, playing some character, going to the sea to drown yourself because you're not happy with life, not remembering dates, and not having a husband- you have hysteria!"
You shook your head frantically. "No, I dont have hysteria-!"
"Not to worry miss! Its very common among women these days, sadly. But I have treated many of them successfully! And I'm sure that will be the case for you as well- Nurse! I need restraints and injections-"
Injection? Hysteria? Oh no, no. No. No! You've read about how they treated hysteria in the 1800s. Sent away to the seaside, lobotomy or forced orga-
"I AM NOT HYSTERICAL!" You thrashed around as more doctors and nurses came to hold you down. You spot the nurse holding up an injection and you only fought harder to escape as you realised Victorian medicine was basically poison itself.
"STOP- STOP! DONT INJECT ME WITH THAT!" You struggled with all your might to free yourself from their grasp, but their grip was tight and unyielding. "ITS FUCKING POISON! YOU IDIOTS! YOU'RE GONNA FUCKING KILL ME!"
You watched in horror as the nurse brought the needle closer to your arm, not even bothering to use an alcohol swab to sterilise the area so great- you'll die of an infection-
"Let her go!" They all looked towards the doorway, where a man stood looking furious. Wearing a brown coat with long sleeves and a wide collar exposing his waistcoat, he marched over to your bed and angrily took off his top hat.
"What is the meaning of this cruelty?! Unhand my wife now!" He yelled at the hospital staff.
Dr Lowe glared at him. "Wife? She said she wasnt married!"
The man scoffed. "We had a fight!" He glared at you this time. "Well, I'm sorry I spent a night away at the pub, darling! Forgive me and come back home?"
They all were staring at you now, and it only took a moment of eye contact with him for you to catch on.
"Fine. I forgive you. Lets go home-"
"Wait a second." The doctor narrowed his eyes at you. "You were found at the beach hours away from here. If he's your husband, then what were you doing there?"
He caught you off guard for a second, but you lied through your teeth.
"I obviously ran away!" You huffed. The man at the other end pulled the doctor by his collar. "And I'm from the newspaper, so if you dont let my wife go now, I will write an article besmirching you- not this run down hospital, no. I will be critisising you personally- whats your name?"
"Dr Lowe!" You pitched in. "Thank you, darling." The man nodded at you before continuing to threaten the doctor.
"I will crucify you, Dr Lowe."
The doctor huffed and nodded at the staff to let you go.
5 minutes later, you were walking with the man to the front desk to collect your belongings. You dont have your time machine on you or your jewellery from the Ottomans.
"Thank you..." You looked at him.
"Colin. Colin Felton."
As you waited for the nurse to return with your things, Colin introduced himself. True to his word, he did work in a newspaper, though you could only describe his work as "investigative journalism", but the term wasnt coined yet.
He was here at the hospital because he'd been trying to collect evidence on the inhumane attitude of healthcare workers towards patients and the alleged barbaric treatments towards the residents.
"So, why'd you help me? I mean, how'd you figured I wasnt hysterical?"
"I didnt." He grinned. "Hysterical or not, no one deserves to get lobotomised or whatever sadistic process they were going to subject you to." Colin looked at you. "How'd you know the injection was going to kill you? And what poison?"
"Look at the state of the hospital- there's arsenic on the walls. And most of the patients there were either strapped to their bed, or lying limp, drooling and groaning. The staff themselves looked like death, and there's no real concept of hygiene here, is there?" You shook your head. "The place is understaffed, overpacked, and completely unprepared for any epidemic or even anything mild!"
Colin chuckled. "Well, well, well. Who taught you so much about hospital management?"
Well, I am from the future where modern medicine has been able to provide vaccines for diseases you could die of.
You shrugged your shoulder. "My brother and I spent a summer at the mortuary." Which is true. You and Qasim had decided one summer to learn more about human anatomy (so that you could one day make your own humanoid-robots) and as kids who were unsupervised by working parents, you decided the best way to learn anatomy would be to go to the mortuary and just... take one home.
Look, in your 7 year old mind- it sounded like a good idea. There were a lot of unclaimed dead bodies at the local morgue and they wouldnt mind if you took one, right?
Qasim was hesitant but went along when you stated it was "for the advancement of science!"
Yeah, anyways, the moment you and Qasim had sneaked in and pulled the storage compartment holding someone, the doctor there caught you two. The only reason he didnt call your parents then was when you two begged you'd do anything and you were just trying to learn about human body and you swore that it wasnt for any "black magic", he instead made you and Qasim intern at the morgue.
Dr Johnson was more concerned that you two werent freaking out over dead bodies, and he probably kept you two around to see if you had any homicidal tendencies, but he found out you two were just curious kids. He was a great teacher, in all honesty, not only did he teach you about anatomy, but also a lot about the embalming, forensics, murder weapons and-
"What do you mean they're not there?" You asked the nurse. "Where's the rest of my stuff?!"
"I'm sorry ma'am, you didnt have anything on you besides the clothes on your back. And you're wearing them-"
"I'm going to give you one more chance- where's. My. Stuff?!" You snapped at her. The nurse stared at you unflinching. You pulled up your sleeve, ready to lunge. "You listen here-"
"What my wife means to say-" Colin placed a hand on your shoulder, reeling you back. "-would you please be kind and check again?"
"Like I told the missus- she didnt bring anything. Also- your missus was carried in here in the arms of another man-"
"What man?" You cut her attempt at tattling.
"He didnt give a name." She scoffed. "He just dropped you on one of the beds and left."
"What did he look like? What was he wearing?"
"I dont remember his face, but he wearing a black coat and hat, and I remember a golden band on his ring finger." She gave you a nasty look at the mention of the ring.
-
"What was so important that you lost?" Colin asked as you two walked. After questioning the nurse until she got fed up, Colin pulled you out of the hospital.
"Just some... jewels. A bracelet. Some cash- well the last bit of it that would get me home." You mumbled, every part of your being doing its best not to break down over losing the only way home. Because if you dont remain calm and lose your shit, you'll end up right back at the hospital to undergo nightmarish treatments.
"We could report it to the police. Although I doubt your case would take priority over the recent rise in murder cases-" You tuned him out as you tried to think where your time machine is.
I was dropped into the sea.... and the waves were harsh. Did I lose it in the sea?
Your stomach twisted at the thought of losing the time machine forever. At least with the thief theory, you had a small chance of getting it back. But you cant go scuba diving to find it in the sea!
"So, what are you going to do now?" He asks as you both sit down. You're holding your head in your hands. Colin's brows furrow in concern.
"Y/n?"
"I dont know, Colin!" You looked up at him. "I dont know! I lost all my belongings, everything that I needed to get home! I have no family, no place to stay and I'm a woman in a time where everyone is trying to either send me off to the looney bin or live horribly in a workhouse!"
"How do you know workhouses are horrible?" Colin raised a brow at you, an accusatory look in his eyes. "This isnt the first time you ran away from home, is it?"
You looked at his face, judging you. If you say yes, he'll think you're just a mad woman who is actually homeless and is trying to use him to get money. And you're already low as it is, you dont need more kicking down.
Scoffing, you glared at him. "What? You think I'm just a mad woman who is actually homeless and is trying to use you for money?" You shake your head, your mind making up excuses. "I... snuck into one of the workhouses."
"Why?"
"So... that I could expose the horrible working and living conditions." You continued before he could ask why. "A friend of mine lived in a workhouse. She complained about the hard labour, the isolation, the inhumane punishments. She died there." You looked down, both for dramatic effect and to avoid being caught in a lie. "I wanted to get justice for her. But the higher ups found out and tried to keep me quiet, which lead to me being on the run and hiding from them, wearing disguises-" You gestured to your Ottoman attire. "-but they caught me and put me on a boat to kill me. It was just pure luck that I washed up on the shore."
Allah, I know lying is a sin but lord- that was amazing how quick I came up with that. Please do not use this to make an example out of me.
Colin gave you a sympathetic look.
"I think I have a way to help you."
-
You were sitting in Colin's apartment.
"Here you go." He returned from the kitchen with a cup of tea.
"Thank you." You took a sip, letting the warm beverage heat your hands. "So, whats your plan?"
"I share this place with 4 people, and one of them has moved out. So, we have a vacant room for you." Colin pointed to a room on the left.
You sighed. "Thats very kind of you to offer Colin, but I cant live here for free-"
"Who said "free"?"
"I dont have a job. I cant pay rent-"
"You do have a job." Colin grinned, leaning back in his chair. "Work with me."
"At the newspaper?" You set your cup down. "I mean- I dont have any experience writing-"
He waved you off. "You dont have to write. I'll write. You- will just collect information for me."
You pondered about his statement. So basically, he wants you to be the "investigator" in "investigative journalism".
"Look, you're gutsy, you're smart, and you're strong willed. I need someone like that to collect data and infiltrate places to expose injustice." Colin leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I'd do it myself, but I've been around these places so many times that they know now that I'm from the paper. Plus, there are many places only a woman could sneak into instead." He clasped his hands. "Its an interesting job. You'll get to meet all kinds of people. And who knows, maybe even the man who saved your life and stole your belongings."
You nodded. "So, how much will you pay?"
-
Later that night, you met with Colin's flat mates- Liam, who was a police officer, Shepherd, who was a barkeeper and Benjamin who was a barber. Fortunately for you, they were all glad to have you as a flatmate, or well maybe they were just happy to have someone to share the expenses with.
Next morning, Colin told you about the assignment he was working on.
"My main project is about exposing the harrowing conditions of patients forced to undergo unnecessary and painful treatments and the atrocious attitude of the staff towards the patients. Especially in mental asylums." He huffed out, shaking his head as if recalling the nightmarish scenes he'd seen. "But thats a big project and is still underworks. You, will have to first interview and collect some dirt on some influential people and upperclass."
"Why?"
"To get access to Queen Victoria." "And why do I need her?" Colin smiled. "Well, the royal family has many sick people, so if she were to become aware of the grim conditions her subjects have to go through at hospitals, then maybe she will do something about it."
"And you think she would help us?"
He nods. "I believe she will. I think birthing 9 children and being surrounded by men who keep things from her, she doesnt have time for her subjects. But if we were to point her in the right direction until she's unable to ignore the problem."
Well, it is true that the English royal family had many illnesses passed down, famously haemophilia and due to inbreeding, some mental illnesses as well. You suppose Colin's plan just might work.
"Okay. So who's my first interviewee?"
"Charles Dickens."
-
What an asshole.
When Colin told you that you were going to interview or well "dig up dirt" on Charles Dickens, you already knew the literary legend was a jerk. Like most kids, you had read his books- "A Christmas Carol", "Oliver Twist", "David Copperfield", etc. Unlike most kids, you looked him up on the internet and went down the rabbit hole to find out everything about his life.
Including his unhappy marital life, where he was married to Catherine Dickens and basically cheated on his wife with an actress 27 years his junior- "Ellen Ternan", or as he liked to call- "Nelly". He had a secret affair with Nelly, who he had apparently spoken "highly" of- having “a pretty face and well-developed figure”—or “passably pretty and not much of an actress.”
But wait- it gets worse.
So after Catherine found out about his affair, she quietly lived apart from him. A painful scandal arose, and Dickens did not act at this time with tact, patience, or consideration. The affair disrupted some of his friendships and narrowed his social circle, but surprisingly it seems not to have damaged his popularity with the public.
While Catherine maintained a dignified silence, Charles took it upon himself to justify his affair by writing letters about Catherine as being an "unfit wife" because of some "peculiarities of temperament" she had, even saying that she didnt care for the kids nor they for her, which in 1800s- was all that you were good for as a woman. And if you're not good at your job and have "peculiarities of temperament" then that means you're just insane.
Yes, Charles Dickens tried to justify his cheating ass with a girl almost 3 decades younger than him, by saying "my wife's crazy!" Which is... a pretty serious allegation because you could be sent to the mental asylum for torturous treatments.
Which is how you got into his house in the first place. Your cover story is that you're a doctor at the mental asylum and have come over to check on Catherine after Charles wrote letters to the hospital expressing his "grave concern over her mental health". That was a tip Colin was able to get.
And now here you are, sitting in his parlour as he told you on and on about his works, how terrible his life was in general- not growing up, and how women in his life have been just such a bad influence.
"What do you think, doctor?" He asked, finally stopping after 20 minutes of yapping.
You cleared your throat, setting the tea cup down. "Oh I think you're absolutely right, Mr Dickens! My God, what good is a woman if she cant even satisfy her husband or take care of her kids?!" You watched his eyes lit up at your words. "I mean, all women are naturally homemakers. They're supposed to be the providers, the nurturers! If a woman fails to make her family feel warm, fails to make her house a home, then she surely has something terribly wrong with her head! Ah, she definitely needs our help!"
"So, you agree? Catherine needs to be institutionalised-"
"Well, I didnt say that." You gave him a coy smile. "I do understand your concern for your wife- you are a loving husband after all. Loving, caring, honest husband. Such a rare breed of men these days, hm?" You watched his smile falter a bit. "I think I will need to observe her a few more times before I make any decision, Mr Dickens. Now, good day!"
-
"I dont understand why I'm not being paid." You huff as you flop onto the sofa.
Colin sighs, rubbing his eyes. "Because I'm not being paid. And if I dont get paid, you dont get paid, remember?" Ah yes. Since you're not officially hired by his newspaper because you're a woman, you're basically Colin's employee.
"And why are you not being paid?"
"Because the paper didnt publish my exposé!" He handed you the paper.
You looked at the front page and threw the paper to the side. "What the hell is this? How long are they going to run the same news- FRONT PAGE, TOO! Its already been a week!"
"Its a big deal-"
"What? Some guy is returning to London is a news now?" You scoffed.
"Its not just some guy." Colin sighed tiredly, slumping in his chair. "Its a FitzGeorge."
"What the hell is a FitzGeorge?"
"You dont know FitzGeorge?" You shook your head. "Prince George, Duke of Cambridge? Queen Victoria's first cousin?"
You tried to remember anything about him. But you dont remember reading much about any cousins of Queen Victoria, when her kids were already so entertaining to read about.
"So, Prince George is returning?"
"No, he's been dead for years! How do you not know this?"
"I live under a rock. So who is returning?" You redirected him back.
Colin gave you a look. "His grandson. Silas Edmund FitzGeorge."
"Right. And why is he so important that he's been on the front page for a week now?"
"He's the most eligible bachelor now." Seeing your unamused look, Colin explained. "Prince George and Queen Victoria fell apart when the former married a ballerina, Sarah Fairbrother. They married without the Queen's consent, though with Sarah being a ballerina, I doubt her majesty wouldve approved of the union either way. Anyways, since they married without her consent, the marriage was essentially null and any heirs produced were illegitimate and not recognised by the crown, thus would not be granted any Dukedoms. Prince George had 3 sons- George, Adolphus and Augustus FitzGeorge. The youngest- Augustus, had two children: Daisy and Silas. Unfortunately, the kids were quite young when they lost their mother. Augustus was away on service on the sea, when his wife was brutally murdered in the family home and rumour has it- Silas had witnessed it first hand. It was just pure luck that he was not spotted by the murderer that the young child was hiding in his closet. While the kids were in mourning, Augustus had apparently went mad with sorrow when he received the news and drowned himself. Pitying the orphans, Queen Victoria had promised to make Silas a Duke and Daisy a Duchess when they came of age. But Daisy was sent to the mad house out of the blue and a few months later, she died there. Poor Silas was now taken in by his grandmother, Sarah, the very woman Queen Victoria hates. Long story short, Sarah worked very hard to raise Silas and eventually he ended up being the first in the royal family to attend Oxford university-" he leaned forward, smiling. "-without any help from the crown."
Oh, so Silas is self made. And not a nepo baby.
"Silas not only is highly educated, but he's also a very successful businessman. He has invested in many businesses and he's been a huge part in reforming industries."
"So... he's rich and self made? Got it." You looked at Colin. "Still doesnt explain why he's making news? Hell, he even took importance over those horrible murders!"
Colin grinned. "Well, he's not the most eligible bachelor just for the commoners. Apparently, the queen is considering him as a match for one of her daughters." He watched realisation finally dawn on you.
"I still should be paid." You grumbled before glaring at him. "Maybe you need to write a better article, good enough for it to take over the front page."
"If you're done criticising my writing skills, I was going to tell you a remedy for this problem." Colin had an evil glint in his eyes. "And we'll have to use our friend Mr Dickens for it."
-
Colin is a genius.
You're currently sitting in Sarah Fairbrother's house- or well a small mansion. Its a huge estate, lush green grounds surrounding it as far as the eye can see. You were sweating by the time you reached inside, the gardens were huge.
How did you end up here? Colin suggested to use dirt on Charles Dickens and blackmail him into getting you an interview with Sarah, since he is popular and part of the high society. And you only had to say "Nelly" for Dickens to fold. He asked Sarah that a young woman would like to interview her for her years as a ballerina.
You knew Sarah was Silas's grandma, but you still were not expecting to see a slim, 86 year old woman who looked absolutely beautiful. Honestly, she did not look a day beyond 60.
"So, how did you know you wanted to become a ballerina?" You asked her, starting off the interview.
The plan was for you to get close with Sarah and find some secrets, so that when Colin writes about them, the editor will take him seriously and then start posting his Dickens article.
The conversation went from her life as a ballerina, to her life as Mrs FitzGeorge. Sarah practically told you everything, you could see she was lonely and she hadnt had anyone to talk to properly. She was kind, sweet lady, and a prima donna ballerina, and you didnt understand why the queen wouldnt like her. But the thing is, her being a ballerina was a stigma in itself, because back in the 1800s, ballet theatres were used as parlours for men to drink and sleep around with women. Thus, by association, ballerinas were bad too.
But despite the queen's shunning, Sarah did not speak ill of her. No, she was a lovely, demure lady who was still very much passionate about ballet.
"And for all the young girls who aspire to be a ballerina one day, much like myself, what advice do you have for them?" You asked,
"Dance with your heart, and your feet will follow!" She smiled so gracefully, that you couldnt help but return it.
"Thank you for such an amazing interview. I am sure girls from all around London will look upto you one day." You said, closing your journal.
"You flatter me, darling." She giggled before looking down at your legs. "You know, I saw your skirt ride up a bit earlier and I think you have the perfect calves for ballet! Have you ever considered?"
You chuckled, shaking your head. "I wish! But I think I'm a little too old to learn ballet now."
"My dear, you're never too old to enjoy life!" Sarah smiled.
"Perhaps, one day." You stand up. "I would love to know more about it. Maybe we can do this again, if you have time?"
It wasn't right to use her loneliness, but... you had to make a living. Besides, there are far worse things you can do than talking to an old lady to solict information.
-
You were not expecting Sarah to invite you back two days later, that too for dinner.
"Its not just a dinner, Y/n." Colin said, pacing back and forth. "I think Silas is going to be there. Of course, it'll be a party in his honour! Ah, the return of the beloved grandson and the most eligible bachelor in town!" He continued to mutter incoherently, his mind working overdrive as he began planning ahead.
"How often does he go mad like this?" You whisper to Benjamin, who was currently styling your hair for the dinner.
He smiled, his moustache curling up. "Quite often." He had your hair in a nice updo, and on your insistence, he also allowed some hair to frame your face.
"You cant go empty handed." Colin said, stopping his pacing. "Its high society, you cant go empty handed! You need to get a gift, something appropriate and if possible, memorable enough for them to call you back again and again."
You glared at him through the mirror you were standing in front of as Benjamin helped tighten your corset.
"I dont think anyone will be forgetting me after the objectionable alterations you made to this gown." You pointed to the outfit you were wearing- a baby blue silk gown with delicate lacework around the scandalous neckline and puffy sleeves, courtesy of Colin.
Colin rolled his eyes. "So what if you showed some skin? I'm only trying to ensure that you leave a lasting impression on them." He put on his hat. "Now come along, we have to get a present too."
You and Colin walked down the streets of London, the area bustling as people returned from their jobs and either rushed home or to the pubs.
"Where are we going to get a present now, Colin? One that is both good enough and you can afford to buy too." You commented as you pulled your coat tighter around your body, the cold biting at your bones.
He offered you his arm and pulled you close to his side to warm you up. "I was going to get a wine bottle but the shop closed early today and Shepherd said he hadn't been able to secure any good bottles at the pub, so we'll- we'll just have to go for the next best thing." You two stopped in front of a shop on Regent street.
Regent's Antiques!
"Really? And you can afford antiques?" You raised a brow at him. He shrugged before pushing you inside the shop. "I dont know, but I am good at bargaining."
The shop is huge and immediately stepping inside, you could tell that there was nothing here Colin could afford to buy. The shelves that held the items alone looked like they were made of rich wood, the smell of mahogany, musk and polish filling up your nostrils.
"Lets get out of here before we embarrass ourselves-" you whisper to Colin but he brushes you off and walks further into the store. Sighing, you start browsing the store, an amalgam of things were present there- relics, ceramics, gold and silver and other metalware.
"And how much is this for, sir?" You turned to see Colin ask the salesman for the price of the vase he was holding. You didnt have to hear how expensive it was when you saw Colin's eyes widen as he nervously chuckled before putting the vase back. You heard him do this again over the next 30 minutes, picking up stuff and placing them back.
In the corner of your eye, you spotted a small box. You picked it up and opened it, smiling as it played a melody while the ballerina figurine twirled in the center.
The perfect gift.
You went upto the counter and asked how much it was for.
"100 pounds."
100 pounds... 100 pounds in 1860, with inflation would be todays-
Your eyes widened as you looked down at the box. The salesman mistook your shock for interest and began explaining how its made of pure gold and that this box belonged to a king who gifted it to his queen for their everlasting love.
"Mmhm. Interesting-" You cleared your throat, placing the box back on the shelf. "- but its not what I'm looking for."
"Y/n? What are you doing? I already bought the gift!" Colin came by your side.
"What did you buy?" You asked him before pulling him to the side to whisper. "What could you have possibly afforded in this place?"
"I almost didnt find anything but then the owner of this place saw me and showed me something a little more in my range and I'm getting it wrapped up now!" He told you gleefully.
"The owner? Who?"
"Mr Blackwood! He came here to get a present for someone too and then showed me some old items that were either too ugly or too damaged or just been here for so long, they had to store it in the back! And I found a gem, not too shabby and in a good condition too!" Colin grinned proudly. "Come on, I'll show you the back!"
He ushered you to the storage and true to his word, the room was indeed filled with boring and damaged items. "Take a look around, I need to haul a carriage to load the present and you cant be late!" He left you there.
You browse through the stuff there before going towards the wooden cabinet in the corner. Its locked. You look through the glass panels at the precious antiques inside- mostly bejewelled items like daggers, boxes, broaches and-
Your breath hitched.
Time machine.
My time machine. Its here!
You press your hands against the glass before pulling on the handles to open it, only for the lock to not budge.
Its just glass. You raise your fist. I can just-
"I wouldnt do that if I were you." A voice called out from behind you. You turned to see a man in the doorway, broad shouldered and even from a distance, you could see he had two shades in his eyes.
Green and brown.
Well suited in a coat and shiny dress shoes, he looked like he was going somewhere. He stepped towards you, an mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Those are my belongings." He said.
Oh. So, he's the owner.
"Not all of it. Thats mine." You point to your machine inside. "It was stolen from me a few days ago."
He shrugged. "How can I believe you? I dont know you." He takes another step towards you. "Besides, everything here once belonged to someone. Now? Its mine."
You frowned. "That belongs to me. I even have an official police report." You dont but you decided to bluff.
He chuckled. "Sure you did. But it still doesnt change the fact that its in my possession now." Before you could reply, Colin returned.
"Ah Y/n! I see you've met Mr Blackwood. He's the-" "Owner. I know. And he stole my stuff." You grumbled to Colin.
Mr Blackwood narrowed his eyes at you. "I did not steal it, young lady. Someone came to us and sold it."
You glare at him. "No-" "Yes, of course, Mr Blackwood." Colin cut you off. "And we appreciate that you've kept it safe, but we would like to buy it back from you."
Mr Blackwood looked at him and then at you, before smiling.
"I wasnt planning on selling but since you already bought one of my antiques..." he nodded. "1000 pounds and its yours."
Your jaw went slack and you almost started to swing when Colin grabbed your elbow.
"Mr Blackwood, if you could just give us a better deal-"
"1000 pounds, Mr Felton. And not a penny less." He said before leaving.
-
"Why are you mad at me?" Colin asked as he sat next to you in the carriage.
"I'm mad at him, Colin! There was no way that was worth 1000 pounds! No one would pay such a ridiculous amount! For anything!" You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest.
"Of course it wasnt worth a 1000 pounds. He raised the price because you pissed him off." You glared at him. "Look, just focus on tonight and when we get our paycheques, I'll go talk to Mr Blackwood again and bargain a good deal. Because even if he did gave us a good deal right now, I couldnt afford it, not after spending money on your outift and that gift,"
You scowl but nod stiffly. "Fine."
The carriage reached the FitzGeorge estate, stopping at the entrance where a small army of servants waited to greet you and other guests.
"Good luck. See you in a few hours." Colin wished you before calling two servants to carry the gift.
"What the hell did you buy?" You ask as you watch the servants carry a rectangular box wrapped in brown paper and a big red bow inside. "Come on, tell me. What if they ask me what it is?"
Colin grinned as he tipped his hat at you. "I guess you'll have to figure out something on the spot. Bye!" The carriage left before you could pester him.
Huffing, you lifted your gown a bit as you walked up the steps and entered inside the beautiful mansion.
The lobby is filled with guests and servants who are taking their coats and leading them inside. There's a stairway on the right leading to private quarters upstairs, a drawing room beside the stairs where you had interviewed Sarah the last time you were here. On the other side, you see a table stacked with presents, your own gigantic box settled behind them.
This was not just a small dinner, was it?
You're lead inside what seems to be a ballroom, the lights seeming to bounce of the polished wooden floors. Waiters are serving guests alcohol and appetisers, and you hold the champagne filled glass too.
Hey, just because I'm not drinking doesnt mean I cant hold it. I need to blend in.
You hold the glass in your hands as you look at the attendees, trying to spot any famous personalities. You notice Charles Dickens again, of course he's here too. Your eyes drink in the pretty dresses of the women and almost roll at the sight of obnoxious men who dont make an effort to conceal their ogling.
Soon, the butlers gets everyones attention as he annoucnes the arrival of the hostess.
"Lady Sarah Louisa FitzGeorge, accompanied by her grandson, Lord Silas Edmund FitzGeorge!"
Sarah was wearing a black regency gown, puffy panelled sleeves and a golden brooch with an onyx stone in the center of her neckline, her neck adorned with pearls and matching tear drop earrings. She walked arm-in-arm with a dashing young man, and you could definitely see why he was the "most eligible bachelor".
Dark chocolate brown hair, the thick locks styled properly and you were sure that under the sunlight, they'd have different shades of brown and golden in them. Fair skinned, yet not deathly pale as most of London is, he had thick brows framing dark grey eyes adorned with enviable thick lashes, that dont seem to be focusing on anyone, just looking ahead, unamused. A sharp Roman nose, followed by perfectly sized pink lips, with a deep and defined cupid's bow and a strong jawline.
They both walked down the stairs and entered the ballroom together, Sarah practically beaming with pride as she walked in with her grandson who towered over her. Everyone talked in hushed whispers, admiring Silas's beauty and how he looked like royalty. Sarah continued to smile at the guests as they made their way towards the center.
As the guest finally quieted down, Sarah began speaking.
"Thank you all for joining me tonight to celebrate my dear Silas's return from Oxford!" People clapped at the huge academic achievement but Silas still looked like he'd much rather be anywhere else than here. Sarah continued. "I had dearly missed him so much. He's been my rock, my star, my everything after his grandfather left me. But tonight is not about sorrows, no. Tonight we celebrate Silas! I hope you enjoy this, darling." She looked up at him and Silas smiled gently at her, a dimple appearing on his left side, leaning down to let her kiss his cheek.
Sarah clapped her hands, nodding at the butler.
Moments later, ballerinas entered the ballroom and began putting on a show. Ah, so this is why you were invited back. Sarah probably thought that you'd enjoy this due to your keen interest in the performing arts.
I mean... its not bad. Actually, its quite entertaining. But you're not here to enjoy ballet. You're here to get dirt on the upper class of London.
You move through the audience, picking up on interesting bits of convo here and there, mostly about extra marital affairs and tax frauds. When you see Silas again, he's not by Sarah's side anymore. No, instead he's now surrounded by some men, much older than him. They seem to be close to him, though Silas doesnt seem to share any familiarity with them as they speak in hushed tones, a hand on his shoulder to emphasise their point. Finally, Silas gives them a nod before moving away from them, and he's once again crowded by 3 boys, much closer to his age this time and Silas actually gives them a smile as they head out of the ballroom.
Friends, maybe relatives? You dont recall Colin telling you he had any brothers, only a sister who passed away in an asylum.
Your eyes trail back to the men who were talking to Silas earlier, only to see a familiar face there.
Mr Blackwood.
Despite being much younger than the men, he seemed to hold authority over them. You could see from the way they shook his hand, eagerly, desperately and talking over each other, but Mr Blackwood just stood there with a charming smile, listening to their concerns before holding a hand up to silence them. He said a few words that seemed to quell their worries before he moved past them and for a brief second, his eyes met yours and he smirked, tipping his head at you before leaving the ballroom.
You thought he'd come to you, maybe interrogate why someone like you was here in the first place, but perhaps you blended in better than you thought.
"Y/n! Darling, you came!" Sarah greeted you happily as she embraced you in a hug. "How do you like the show?"
"Oh, its just so... exquisite. Bewitching, really!" You smile before complimenting her outfit. "And your gown, your jewellery, everything looks so beautiful! If I didnt know any better, I'd say you were Silas's elder sister!"
She laughed softly, her eyes sparkling. "Oh, its you kids who keep me so young! Come on, I want to introduce you to Silas! I'm sure he'd be delighted to meet you." She lead you towards the lobby after a servant told her about his whereabouts, and there you saw him and his friends from earlier.
Silas leaned against the wall, watching humourlessly as the boys went through his gifts, opening them up crassly and mocking the gifts, all while he sipped his champagne.
"Silas- boys! What are you doing?!" At Sarah's admonishing tone, all of them straightened up.
One of the 3 boys, a blonde pouted as he stood up from the floor, dropping the gift box in his hands and you heard glass break.
"Nana! We were just helping Silas open his presents!"
Another boy, also blonde but he was taller than the first one, sheepishly hid his hands behind his back, though the crinkling of wrapping paper gave him away.
"Yes Nana, we were just helping him! He gave us permission to do so."
"Permission to act like animals?" Sarah fumed, making them lower their heads. It was kinds of adorable seeing them standing there looking defeated while a woman much smaller in stature than them scolded them.
Finally, the third boy who was the brunet and the oldest of the three stepped closer to Sarah. "Sorry Nana, we'll be more careful next time. Right boys?" The blondes nodded. The brunet then settled his eyes on you. "And who's the lovely lady next to you, Nana?" He changed the topic and Sarah's anger seemed to evaporate as she looked at you.
"Ah, yes! This is Lady Y/n Paddington!" Yes, Paddington as in Paddington the bear. What? This was the only name that came to mind at the moment that couldnt be traced. "She's the one who interviewed me about my career as a ballerina a few days ago. And look! Today we had a show for her to see!"
The three boys greeted you nicely, making some comments about how pretty you are before getting glared at by Sarah. Silas remained leaning against the wall, looking out the window at the dark night.
"Silas! Darling, come say hi!" Sarah called him before turning her attention to the boys, scolding them for being so undignified for opening Silas's presents.
Silas walked over to you, and you took a deep breath to introduce yourself-
"Are you done?"
You blinked at him in confusion. What?
"What?"
Silas looked past you at his grandma before looking down at you.
"I said, are you done? Have you gotten what you came here for?" He asked monotonously.
Wow. So does everyone have a stick up their ass in high society?
You narrowed your eyes at him. "And what exactly would that be?"
His expression didnt change. "Jewels, cutlery, secrets, contacts, a rich man?"
"What makes you think I already dont have all of those things?"
He scoffed, giving you a look. "You stick out like a sore thumb. You're not part of the wealthy." Silas looked at the champagne glass in your hand before smirking.
"What now?" You seethed.
"Anyone with a taste for finer things in life knows not to hold the glass from the top. You hold it from the stem, so that you dont warm the drink from the heat of your palm." He leans down to whisper in your ear. "Stop pretending to be someone you're not."
You know you shouldnt have, you know that you're better than him academically by literally centuries, you know this is how all rich douchebags act, but you just couldnt let a self entitled brat insult you to your face and you've had enough of those in the past few eras.
You smiled. "I guess you would know who's pretending." Silas smirk faltered.
"Remind me if the FitzGeorges are still considered royalty or not?"
You watched his eyes set ablaze, his jaw tick but before he could respond, the sound of paper being ripped cut him off.
"Charles!" Sarah yelled at the young blonde who had just ripped the wrapping paper off your present.
"Nana! This one's from Lady Y/n! Look-!" He removed the lid from the box before Sarah could stop him and your heart dropped at the sight of the contents.
Its a painting.
Its a portrait. The portrait.
The one Baldwin had made. The one that Mehmed had gotten on his conquest. The one you forgot to destroy in the Ottoman empire.
And now its here. In 1860 London. How the hell did it survive over 700 years?
Sure its not as brand new as the last time you saw it, the paint is faded and varnish is gone, but the face- your smudged face is still there!
"This is ugly, right?" Charles remarked, only to be smacked on the head by Sarah.
"It is not! Its exquisite! Its one of a kind! Just like how Silas likes his things- unique!" Sarah looked at you smiling. "I'm sure there's a story behind this, right darling?"
Your throat went dry as you nodded slowly. "Y-yes." You cleared your throat, eyes fixated on the portrait. "The owner told me that this belonged to the Turkish empire once, and um... one of the princes of the time had gotten it as a part of his loot from the conquest."
"But who's the broad-" Charles cut off his words as Sarah glared at him. "I mean- who's pretty lady in the painting?"
"She's... unknown. I only know that this was commissioned by her lover. Also, he was insane apparently." Sorry Baldwin, but you were insane.
Sarah clasped her hands over her heart, touched. "Ah! Painting by a man madly in love of his beloved! How romantic! I will have this hung up in our hallway with the rest of the paintings!"
You shake your head. "Oh, I dont think it'll go with your style-"
"Of course it will! Its a symbol of love, of devotion. Just like me and my Georgie. Just like how I wish for Silas to experience it one day." Sarah smiled at Silas.
"Yes, the day when Silas will be bitten by a rabid dog." Charles snickered only to have his ear twisted by Sarah as she began dragging him away, saying that she will tell his father of his behaviour tonight.
Without much to say, you left shortly after, bidding Silas's cousins goodbye and not bothering with Silas who was glaring daggers at you.
-
"You said what to Silas?" Liam asked as he returned from his patrolling. "I cant believe it. He is a part of royalty, maybe not directly but still!"
"He started it first." You pouted as Benjamin chuckled behind you, undoing your updo.
"Yes, but he was right to call you out. I mean, who holds the flute from the top?" Shepherd asked, sitting down as he handed Liam a drink.
You narrowed your eyes. "Well, I'm sorry that I'm not an obnoxious, rich, raging alcoholic!"
All of them chuckled as Colin sat down with a lazy smile, nursing his drink.
"You did good work tonight, Y/n." He raised the glass to you before downing his drink. You perked up. "So this means I'm getting paid with a bonus?"
He chuckled and gave you a nod. "Of course, but first- we'll need to write articles."
"We?" He nodded. "Yes. We. You will work on the FitzGeorge article for me, and write mostly good things about them so it gets published. I, will be working on the Dickens exposé along with the other secrets you've been able to get tonight. This way, when your FitzGeorge article gets published, you will get even closer to the family and the publisher will finally let me post the dirty secrets of high society! Its a win-win, really."
You leaned forward. "You make it sound so simple but while I may have been allowed to personally interview these people- that too, under the guise of not being associated with the paper, I dont think I will be allowed to work at your newspaper without being called out as your source and then none of these rich snobs will ever let me be close." You leaned back, letting Benjamin massage the knots out of your head. "The reason why Sarah even let me interview her was because I told her I wanted to promote the arts, starting with ballet. She thinks I write for the girls fraternity houses, like some sort of school project. Not a major publishing house!"
Colin rubbed his chin before snapping his finger. "I got it!" He grinned as he leaned forward. "You can write two stories! One- about your interview with Sarah! And it'll be under your name and we'll spread it around actual girl hostels, to make it seem legitamate when someone from the FitzGeorge house gets it. Doesnt matter if it'll do well or not, because you'll only sing her praises and this will make you well liked by Sarah and make her invite you to more events. And the other story, will be about the FitzGeorge estranged family relations with the Queen! Now that will get us more readers and the editor will be happy to publish it too! As for how you will actually write it- well, how would you like to be a boy?"
Everyone stared at Colin, as if he'd grown two heads.
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"I said, how would you like to be a boy?"
-
"If I wasnt sent to an asylum before, I'd definitely be sent to one now." You stated as Colin adjusted your bowtie.
"Only if you get caught!" He gave you a cheeky grin before shaking his head. "Which wont happen! I wont let you get caught."
"Now, turn." Benjamin said making you face him. He smiled as he placed a fake moustache on you. "Colin, you really are testing my skills these days. I mean, making Y/n a man? With a moustache? And styling her hair, even though it would've made everything so much easier if someone would just let me cut their hair-" you glared at him. "Okay, okay. No chopping off your hair. Jesus, what's with the death glare?"
"You're worried about the death glare? I'm worried why Liam was so pissed about being the only one whose clothes fit Y/n. I guess he always thought that being a copper meant he way more buff than he actually is." Colin commented. "Despite his lean built, he's surprisingly strong. Did you see the way he flipped over that thief?"
Benjamin nodded, combing your moustache.
"You're a very gorgeous male! Very demure." Colin grins before giving you some brief instructions on how to keep your cover and act manly.
"Right- so what name did you pick for your story?"
The corner of your mouth quirked up slightly.
"Holmes. Sherlock Holmes." What? Arthur Conan Doyle is probably just an year old right now. Its not gonna affect anyone if you chose one of your favourite characters names.
Plus, you're going to be an investigative journalist. So, it fits well, okay?
"Lets go, Mr Holmes."
-
With Colin's reference, you're able to get a job at the paper. And with your people watching hobby, you're able to successfully pass of as a man, a pretty man- but a man, nonetheless.
You've been hit on by a few women on the streets.
After working here for a few weeks, you finally get paid when the editor publishes your work on the FitzGeorge. You wrote mostly about Sarah and the FitzGeorge family relations with Queen Victoria, and just a few tantalising words about Silas that would have the readers waiting impatiently for the next update on the bachelor, thereby garnering more attention and you- more money, which you need to buy your time machine back.
You're sitting at your desk, typing down your next article when there's a commotion in the office.
"The boss is here! The boss is here!" Everyone rushed to do their respective tasks, or at least- look busy, do nothing. Out of the corner of your eye, you spotted the owner of the paper walking down the hallway, talking to-
Silas.
Silas was walking beside him, looking uninterested as he listened to his friend explaining how he operated his news agency. He gave a lookover to the cubicles before moving on. For a second, you thought he's seen you. But you were hiding behind other men, there was no way he'd spotted you.
Oh no. Is he here because he'd figured out you were the one who wrote the article in the paper? No, no- he couldnt have-
Fortunately for you, he hadnt. Silas was there because his friend, the owner, had invited him to show his newspaper agency.
With the weight off your shoulders and your pay in your pocket, you were back at the antique shop.
"You got the 1000 pounds?" You cursed mentally when you heard his agitating voice.
"Mr Blackwood, I have 3 pounds-" He cut you off with booming laughter. "Ah, poor people crack me up."
Resisting the urge to strangle him, you cleared your throat. "If you could just give me a real figure, an acceptable deal, I would like to buy my own property back."
He rested his head on his palm, leaning on the cash counter. "Now what's so special about it, hm? Because I cant seem to figure out what it even is?"
"Its nothing...." You remark before sighing. "Its a toy. It holds sentimental value."
He tilted his head. "Does it now?"
You nod.
He smiled, though something else swirled in those mischevous eyes. "Alright, I'll give you a deal." You prepare yourself. "I'll give your toy back if.... you go out on a date with me."
You narrowed your eyes. "I am not sleeping with you, Mr Blackwood-"
"And why would I do that to myself?" He raised a brow. "All I'm asking for is one date, a lovely dinner that I'll be paying for and then we can return to the shop and you can have your toy back."
You pondered over his offer, trying to figure out any traps.
"Why do you want to date me? I'm poor, like you said."
He shrugged. "Maybe I find you intriguing." He leaned forward on the counter again, wiggling his brows. "Come on, its just one date. No funny business, I promise."
You stared at him for a few more minutes before nodding. "Fine. But I get to pick the place and I will have you know that I have friends all over that will be looking for me if something were to happen."
He smirks at your attempt to threaten him. "I think we both know that I could get away with it all, love. All while making your friends disappear if I wanted to."
The way he stated it like it was true- it sent a chill down your spine.
Mr Blackwood waved to you. "See you tomorrow at 6, darling! Dont be late."
-
The next night, Colin had dropped you off at the antique store, telling Mr Blackwood- or Henry, as he insisted you called him, to bring you back before 10 pm.
You sat across from him in a fancy restraunt.
"I'll have a beef wellington and for the lady-" Henry looked at you.
"Just chips." You closed the menu, handing it back to the waiter. Henry chuckled, shaking his head.
"So... whats your deal?" You ask him, resting your elbows on the table.
He leaned in as well, dual coloured eyes sparkling with mischief and amusement. "I'm resourceful. You?"
"Cut the crap. Why am I here?" You glare at him, and he chuckled, resting his head on his palm. "I like you."
"As anyone with eyes should, but also why would you do that to yourself?" You huffed as you move away, resting against the chair as you crossed your arms over your chest.
He copied your actions, resting his arms against his chest. "Maybe I want to fall in love with you."
"I'd rather poke my eyes out." You snarked. Henry looked at the cutlery on the table. "There's the fork."
Your nostrils flared. "You think you're so clever?"
"Oh I know I'm clever, love. But it is truly remarkable it took you so long to figure it out." He grinned cheekily. "Alright alright. Ask your question."
"How do you know the FitzGeorges?"
He looked rather bored at your question. "I know everyone." Seeing your dissatisfaction, he offered you another answer. "I'm rich. They're rich. We socialised."
Thats how rest of the dinner was spent- you interrogating him, him dodging you with vague answers. Though you had a feeling he knew more than he was letting on, almost like he could read you like an open book.
Finally, the night came to an end as you saw his store come up in view.
At the end of the street, just a few shops down from his, you stopped and looked at him. "Well, this was a... date." He chuckled as you continued unphased. "I held up my end of the deal, now its your turn."
Henry nodded, grabbing your hand in his warm one, thumbing your knuckles. "Of course. I'm a man of my word." He brought your hand upto his lips, pressing a soft kiss.
"I hope you get home safely, darling."
You made a disgusted face, yanking your hand from his grasps as you wiped his kiss off with your coat. "I hope I never see you again."
He chuckled, throwing his head back. "Oh I think I'll be seeing you again rather soon, love. I enjoyed our date too much." Seeing you pissed made him laugh again, and he nodded his head at the store.
"Come along. Lets get you your toy-" He was cut off by the sound of a loud blast, the shockwaves so powerful that it made the glass of all windows in a mile shatter, the ground shook. In a second, Henry lunged at you, covering your body with his as another blast went off. Moments later, he got off you and you finally saw his shop set ablaze and completely destroyed.
Your ears rung as you stared at the fire in the shop, not noticing the people rushing out of their homes, not hearing the screams of shock, not hearing Henry calling your name.
"Y/n?! Y/N?!" He shook you by the shoulders hard, finally making you look at him. He was saying something, but you couldnt understand what. You looked at him confused, before your eyes shifted back to the fire.
You dont know when Colin came, you dont remember when Henry pushed you into his arms, yelling at Colin to get you out of there. You dont know when you got home, you dont know what the boys were asking as they picked out bits of glass from your skin.
All you know is when you woke up the next morning and stared at your bandaged skin, events of last night flashed through your head again and the realisation became the painful truth-
The time machine is destroyed.
-
You're staring at the tea cup, the beverage swirling as the maid added sugar in it.
Round. Round. Whirlpool. And then... everything settles.
The motion of the tea perfectly depicted how your life has been for some time. Thrown around in a hurricane of calamities, from one era to another, your life coming close to an end just like the tea threatened to spill over the edge, before everything settles down. Like your plans of ever returning home- stopped.
You'd returned to the sight of the incident, a part of you holding on to the hope that maybe- just maybe, your time machine survived.
It hadnt. Nothing in that store had. Henry Blackwood ran around the store, his face hardened and his collected faccacde was long gone, replaced with frowns and wrinkles. His store was surrounded by coppers and what you could only assume were either detectives or insurance guys.
After the devastating realisation, you had sort of went into a depressive spiral. Lying in your bed for days, your pillow stained with tears, Colin promising to replace whatever it is that you lost as Benjamin petted your hair, inconsolable.
A few weeks later, you returned to work. Though nothing interested you anymore, you felt like you were living on borrowed time, that any moment now, you'll face the consequences of screwing around with history and either die or possibly destroy the universe.
"Y/n?" You blinked, coming back to reality.
Sarah was sitting across from you, her face concerned as she set her tea cup down. "Darling, are you okay?"
You tried to smile, but your facial muscles didnt cooperate.
"Yes. Just... a bit tired." You diverted your eyes as you brought the cup up to your lips.
Sarah's brows furrowed even more, but she could see you were hesitant to talk about the subject.
"I called you here today to congratulate you on your article!" You looked up at her, staring at her a bit dazed. "The interview was very well received with not only just people in my circle, but female students all over in London as well!"
Sarah continued to sing your praises, while you kept your head down, offering little hums here and there.
"Even my family, who I hadnt talked to in a while, told me that they adored the way you wrote-" Your heart cracked.
Family. Mom. Dad. Qasim. I'll never see them again. They wont find out what happened to me, probably hoping that I'm missing but... alive at least. Forever holding onto that painful hope, that I may return home one day.
But I wont. I cant.
You stood outside the FitzGeorge house, under the pillars as you watched the rain fall.
"I think you should stay until-" Sarah offered, eyes looking at the sky that was pouring like cats and dogs.
"I need to go home. Thank you." You tried to smile again, but your eyes betrayed you, shinning with tears. But you left before she could say another word.
Your bones could feel the cold rain biting, your dress drenched, your socks uncomfortably wet, the tip of your nose chilled, your hair sticking to your skin, but none of it mattered. Not when you needed the same rain to hide your tears.
Your neck muscles strained as they tried to contain your sobs, your grief.
I messed up. I screwed up everything. This is all my fault.
You walked faster out of the estate, the water splashing as you stormed away, trying to find some corner where you can hide away and cry your heart out.
I'm alone. I'm all alone. I have no one. No home, no family.
You struggled to breathe, feeling like your chest was caving in.
What have I done?
In your haste, you didnt see the carriage coming straight towards you, until someone yanked you out of the way by your arm.
"Are you blind?! Or deaf-" Silas stopped his scolding as he stared at your red eyes, your wobbling lips. He loosened the painful grip on your arm, his eyes still staring into your crying ones.
Silently, he pulled you back towards the estate, though he didnt take you inside. He had a feeling you didnt want his grandmother pestering you with questions right now.
An arm around your shoulders, Silas lead towards the botanical garden house.
He helped you sit on one of the benches as the dark clouds seemed to veil the garden house, giving you two privacy. He sat down next to you.
"What happened?"
Silas watched your face screwed up in pain as you bring a hand to your temples, your lips quivering as you sniffled.
"I lost... everything."
After a few moments of silence, before sighing.
"You've only lost when you give up. Have you given up?"
You turned your head to the side, looking at his serious face.
"Yes."
He took another deep breath.
"Can you do anything about it?"
"No."
He glanced at you before looking back at the clouds.
"Do you want to die?"
You stopped for a moment. Do I? Do I want to die?
"Maybe."
"Thats not an answer." He raised a brow at you. "How about this- until you find a definitive answer to that question, you keep on living?"
Seeing your dead stare, he continued. "Look, if the worse has already happened to you, you have nothing left to fear anymore. In fact-" Silas went on to say similar motivating stuff for the next 20 miuntes, and you were simultaneously listening and not listening. Well, you heard what he was saying, you just didnt bother processing it because your mind was preoccupied by your own monologue.
He's right. The worse has already happened. I have lost the machine. I have lost my only way home. I have screwed up history. And yet, I'm alive.
Yes. This is what the universe wants- to see me down on my butt, laughing at my misery.
Well, guess what? Fuck this, fuck the universe! I'm been so careful only to barely survive. Now? I'm gonna live and I dont care what chaos it'll cause!
"Y/n?" You looked at Silas, who looked at you expectantly. "I asked you a question."
"What?"
His shoulders slumped.
"I said- will you marry me? And before you say no-"
"Okay."
Watch this, universe. Its my turn now.
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So???? Thoughts???? Comments and asks???
Part 12 is here!
908 notes · View notes
m0chis-cafe · 7 days ago
Note
Hii! Can I request a headcanon reaction of vice dorm leaders with their S/O being jealous since another girl is hitting on them? S/O doesn't outright confront but is obviously fuming in the sidelines. Glaring bullets the the girl
Thank you in advance!
oh absoulty! ive been waiting for someone to request the vice-housewardens, I love them sm (I'm excluding ortho from this). some stray a little, but i also think that with some of them this wouldnt be a real issue
i know nightraven is all boys, bare with me here chat
vice-housewardens would react to you being jealous..⋆⑅˚₊
word count:
warnings: small amounts of angst (feeling insecure or inadequate as a partner), a whole lotta fluff to compensate, kissing, swearing, teasing, slightly suestive in some parts
characters: trey, ruggie, jade, jamil, rook, and lilia
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trey clover♣️
-would be so sweet and understanding
-wouldnt mind at all and reasure you afterwards very calmly
-doesnt even give you a chance to feel shitty about anything
-bakes you a little treat and lets you jst sit on the counter while he baes and tells you all about how much he only has eyes for you
when you agreed to acompany trey and riddle to their hometown over a break, you hadent imagined that youd run into a childhood friend of theirs. a girl that helped around with them a lot, and grew up with them. at first it was fine.. until she started putting her hand on treys shoulder, hitting his arm a lot, fluttering her eyelashes at him.. and than suddenly it wasent ok.
you now sat fumming in the corner of his family owned bakery, muchning on a pastry he had made just for you- but sudenly the sweet taste of the berries tasted bitter as you watched their childhood friend attemt to kekindle an old grade-school crush.
riddle leaned agasnt the wall next to you, a smirk placed on his lips as his arms crossed over his chest. you glared up at him before he could even speak, "imma stop you right there riddle.. im- im fine." he looked like he was about to laugh hysterically at your red face, "you look as red as i usually do. she really got under your skin that much prefect?"
as you continued to glare daggers at their childhood friend, you didnt even noticed trey glance at you. he quickly noticed that you seemed annoyed adn asked her to leave, with much resistance she fianlly left. only then did you relize him appraching you, "you seem upset love.." he smiled softly at you.
you let out a small huff, leaning foward to bury your face in his chest, "you know im not mad at you..". you leaned more into him as you felt his chest rumbling with hims humming, his fingers laced into your hair, soothing you so quickly it was stupid.
you lifted your head to look at him, gazing into his eyes, "you owe me so many pastries for that very stressful experience, clover". he leaned down and pecked your nose, mumbling against your skin, "whatever youd like from me, i will give my dear."
ruggie bucchi🍂
-is so oblivious to anything initaially
-takes the flirting straight to his ego (until jack slaps him on the back of the head and tells him to go comfort his partner)
-trys to apologize profusley with gifts and all sorts
you were sat in the bleachers, watching another spell drive game that ruggie had asked you to watch. you were sat with ace, duece, and grimm as you witnessed savanaclaw destroying the other team. your whole focus was on ruggie as he smiled and blew kisses to you each time he scored.
it was so dorky, but also so cute; minus ace gagging every time it happened.
by the time the game was over the trio went down to the field to meet up with ruggie, you searched for a while before seeing leona, "leona! hey, where's ruggie?" he looked down at you unimpressed, but pointed a finger behind him. when you shuffled to look behind him you saw a girl talking to him, holding his arm, and trying to flirt with him. and suddenly you understood why leona looked upset when you asked..
"ohh.. prefects gonna kill him." you heard ace mumbled behind you before grimm jumped up on your back, "ive been telling you hes no good henchhuman, he never shares his food with me.." you rolled your eyes at the glutton of a direbeast you got stuck with before grabbing him off you and handing him to duece.
you calmly walked over to them and stood beside ruggie, a blank expression on your face, "hey, can i help you?" as you slip a hand into his. you watch her expression grow sour as she rolls her eyes adn turns away from you both.
you hear him chuckle nervously before you even look at him, "baby, listen to me- shes a crazed fan.. i swear". you drop his hand and stand in front of him, crossing your arms over your chest. "no c'mon, dont give me the disappointed look" he whined, wrapping his arms around your waist and slumping into you.
you sighed and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, as you did you felt him smile into your neck before picking you up and spinning you around, "your the best partner ever, she doesnt even compare baby, promise". you giggled as he set you down, a small smile now on your face, "fine fine, but i expect you to get grimm food the rest of the month" you watched as his face fell and you knew hed never entertain another girl ever, even for his ego.
jade leech🍄
-he relizes pretty quickly
-plays into it for a while, but gets bored of her quickly cause she aint you
-teases you for feeling envious at all
-kisses you all over to make up for it
you were working a shift at the monstro lounge with the twins. it was an especially loudly and busy night because it was a friday, everyone was excited to have a few days off of school. so it left you working more hours than usual with floyd and jade, running back and forth to drop off drinks whie they handled food.
eventually azul told you to take a break because you looked like death. so you ended up sitting down in the back area of the lounge, sipping on a water. it was so peaceful before floyd barged through the door and almost made you drop your glass, 'floyd-" "shrimpy!".
you smiled at his antics, rolling your eyes at his volume. he crouched in front of you with a big smile, "you should wrap up your break.. jades with a girl out there~". you quirked an eyebrow at him, "seriously? thats all you got today, your usually much better with your bits floyd.."
he huffed and rolled his eyes at you before dragging you up, pushing you to look out the window in the door leading back to the lounge, "ah- floyd! seriously i just wanna take my break.. c'mon-" you got cut off on the view of a girl in a long dress with a long slit sitting at a raised table, seemingly flirting with jade as he stood there and smiled at her.
you could hear floyd giggling behind you, "oh~ shrimpys mad", you turned and glared at him, "go get him, and bring him here please" he smiled brodly and left quickly (such a suck up for drama). you sat to the side as you watched floyd drag his brother into the back room.
he smiled when he saw you, "hello, my pearl." you look at him unimpressed, arms crossed across your chest. floyd got the vibe and slipped out of the room, when he did jade stridded across the room to you, "why the face darling?" as he slipped his arms around your waist.
you quickly pointed a finger at him, "nu uh, your not getting out of this that easily leech". he tilited his head at you, "get out of what?" your blank stare in responce was enough to make him laugh as he retsed his head in the crook of your neck, placing small kisses up to your jaw, "i promise it was nothing.."
you sighed, lacing a hand through the hair at the base of his neck as he came to face you, gazing into your eyes before placing a kiss on your lips, "does this make it better.." he mumbled against your lips. you rolled your eyes, pulling him back by his collar.
when you pulled back you noticed he had a small blush on his cheeks, "now were even". you tried to walk back to the lounge with a smug smile on your lips, only to be pulled back by your wrist and back into his embrace, "your not getting away that easily darling.." he murmured against your jaw. and suddenly it was hard to remember why you were even mad..
jamil viper🐍
-doesnt even entertain the other girl, just kinda stands there with a blank face
-is disgusted by a person flirting with him that isnt you
-your not even there, or really aware, cause he just looks so disgusted by their presence you assume its someone annoying him
-your the reasonable one here
kalim had thrown another party at the scarabia dorms, so while jamil stayed in the kitchen and made a majoroty of the food you offered to stay out with everyone else and basically babysit kalim for him. so it left you sat in the lounge of scarabia with a drink in hand, sat on a pillow next to kalim as he eagerly chatted with dorm members about their classes and coming plans.
every once and a while youd see jamil come out with more food or refilling drinks, and that was your favorite part of the night cause hed come give you a kiss on the top of your head without fail. a small thank you for watching kalim for him.
but as you watched him come out again, you watched a girl grab him by the arm and pull him to her as she talked in his ear. you also watched a face of disgusted take over his features as he yanked his arm away and didnt say a word to her, retreating back to the kitchen.
you tugged on kalim cardigan sleeve, "hey.. kal.. whos that girl?" you pointed to her as you asked, he made a face before responding, "some weird girl, i dont really know her. or why shes here actually.." he tapped a finger to his chin in thought, "nah cant remember!" as he smiled at you before going back to his conversation.
you rolled your eyes and settled back into the pillows behind you, sipping on your drink. after a couple minutes you felt a familiar arm wrap arund your shoulders from the other side that kalim wasent on. glancing over you saw your boyfriend, you leaned into his side smiling, "giving yourself a break for once viper?"
he shuddered and stuck his tongue out, "i wish, no, some girl wont leave me alone" you almost burst out laughing on the spot, "i saw.. she seemed into you. you dont know her?" he immediately shook his head, "ew, fuck no. and she keeps following me and its gross." you laced your hand through his that dangled from your shoulder and smiled, "you cant even be civil and have a conversation to tell her to leave u alone?"
he looked down at you like you told him to curse his whole dorm(well shit..), "what? absolutely not." you quirked an eyebrow at him, "why not?" as you asked you heard kalim speak up beside you, "because shes not you prefect! he wont talk to anyone really that isnt you or if he has to" he gave you a smile and turned back to his conversation.
you looked back to jamil with a smirk, "your such a softie.." he turned away with a slight flush on his cheeks, "whatever.." you smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek, "its fine, i love it". he turned back and sighed, placing a kiss on your forehead, mumbling against your skin, "love you too alhabib.." (its beloved in arabic).
rook hunt🪶
-entertains it until he relizes that theyre actually flirting with him
-kinda just lets them talk it out than explains hes taken and goes to you
-messes with them for flirting with him in the first place
you sat in the cafeteria with vil, epel, jamil, and kalim, you were all talking about rehersals for the upcoming singing and dancing competition. you were too invested in the conversation that you hadent realized that rook was still missing until epel spoke up, "hey kalim, you had a class with him, do you know where rook is?" you watched as he thought for a moment and shook his head, "havent seen him since we left class, sorry"
it was weird.. he was never late, "hey im gonna go look for him, fill me in later epel!" you called behind you as you grabbed your bag and left the cafeteria. wandering the halls you kept your ears open, you knew your boyfriend was loud and it would be the first thing you could notice.
as you turned a corner you finally heard him in the cortyard, as well as a.. girl? peeking around the corner you saw a girl talking to him as he sat there with a blank face.. was she hitting on him? after a couple seconds you watched as he smiled and laughed at her a little, patted her shoulder and started walking in your direction.
you ducked behind the wall and tried to act as natural as possible. when he came around you called him out, "rook, hey..". he jumped a little adn turned towards you, "oh! mon cheri! how are you? come to look for me?" you crossed your arms over your chest at his words, giving him a skeptical look.
he continued to smile at you, grabbing your hands and uncorossing your arms, "why so cross cheri?". you sighed and explained what you had saw, when you were done you heard him laughing at you, wait- what, laughing? "oh my, you misunderstand. she was confused, she didnt relize i had you". you sighed, leaning into his side, "your lucky i belive you.." he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, tucking you close, placing a kiss on the crown of your head, "i only have eyes for you mon cheri"
lilia vanrouge🦇
-teases the girl for hitting on him ("you didnt know? im already married?")
-dismisses her so quickly its not even funny
-like jamil, your not even there or aware cause when you are he never leaves you and makes it atrociously clear your together
-hangs on you for the rest of the night saying how scary the other girl was and being a little drama queen
-i imagine him as being so attached to you that other girls hitting on him is just funny becuase hes so damn devoted to you
you sat in the lounge of diasmonia with sebek and silver, you helped them with their recent potions assignment. when they had finally gotten it you grabbed the book you were reading and picked up where you left off. malleus sat on his own chair, reading a recent book you had recommended to him. you normally be with lilia but he was finishing up running some errands and you decided to stay in the dorm and wait for him.
you didnt even hear him coming back to the dorm, the first thing you felt was a breath on your neck and you knew he was back, "hello my love.." you kept your eyes trained on your book as you watched silver and sebeks necks snap up and see him there, both equally confused on how you knew before they did, "lilia! your back already!"
you winced slightly, "not so loud seb, please" he immediately apologized, he held you to as much respect as he did lilia. you sighed as you felt said man plop onto the couch next to you, rolling his head into your lap. wrapping his arms around your hips as he buried his face into your shirt, "it was horrible dear" he wailed quietly, muffled by your clothes.
you gently ran a hand through his hair, continuing to read your book as you indulged him, "what happened now?" he rolled over, his face upwards. you moved your book to look down into his eyes with a skeptical look, "there was a girl, and she hit on me" you faked a gasp, "my poor boy, whatd she do?" being so used to his antics.
he floated up, flinging his arms around for theatrics, "she was trying to ask me to get coffee" you placed a hand over your mouth in fake shock, "and whatd you tell her?". he hung upside down and placed a kiss on your lips, pulling back slightly with bright eyes and a smile showing his fangs, "that i already have a beautiful wife at home". you rolled your eyes smiling, "thats my husband".
"that was so brave lilia!" (sebek in the background crying at his bravery)
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biblomaniac · 4 months ago
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Supercorp headcanon:
Kara and Lena are both clingy, but in very different ways. Kara is obviously one who seeks and gives physical touch at any available moment. At first, this disturbed Lena. For most of her life, touch meant fear, anger, and revulsion.
Over time and with lots of set backs, Lena becomes adjusted to Kara’s touch and starts to crave it. For someone as touch starved as she is, Lena is still incredibly controlled as she seeks Kara’s comfort. While Lena will rarely initiate even the shortest of hugs, as soon as Kara hugs her, or holds her hand, Lena grasps on and holds tightly until Kara breaks the contact.
This is all well and good until other people start to notice. Once the Superfriends start commenting on their perpetual close proximity, Lena becomes self conscious and refuses to touch Kara. Of course, Kara thought she had upset Lena in some way and almost begs Lena to tell her how she can make up her “transgression.” Lena eventually admits that she was embarrassed of being called out and didn’t want to overstep any boundaries. Kara repeatedly assures Lena no boundary was crossed, and even vehemently encourages the brunette to seek Kara’s physical intimacy.
Here begins the complete and utter downfall of their “friendship” as they know it. Now both women are constantly touching, cuddling, and hugging. They touch so often that it becomes a rarity for them to be apart in any way if they are in the same room. Whether it be a hand at Lena’s back or Kara’s arm, the women are completely inseparable.
It isn’t until Kara starts pulling Lena into her lap at game nights or the bar that Lena begins to question how common it is for best friends to be as connected as they are. By all accounts, it’s not common, but at this point, Lena may go through withdrawals if she dials it back. So she says nothing and enjoys Kara’s intimacy while it lasts.
Once Kara starts kissing Lena’s cheek, forehead, and hand at any possible moment, Lena starts to think something is off about their friendship. The night Kara kisses her on the lips as the watch The Proposal, Lena builds up enough courage to confront Kara.
“What are we doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, what are we doing with the hugs, the touching, and now the kissing? Fuck, two days ago we woke up spooning and you haven’t said a word! When are we going to address this—this—”
“Lena.”
“I don’t understand, how can it be normal for friends to—”
“Lena! We aren’t friends. And we haven’t been for a long time...”
Like a record scratching, Lena freezes and just stares. When she comes back to herself, Kara is still talking but it feels like she’s messed a thing or two.
“…we’ve been dating for months, Lena. I thought you would be comfortable with this by now. We can take a step back if you want, but…”
“Dating? What do you mean dating?”
“Lena, what did you think we were doing this whole time? The constant contact, the lunch dates, and sleepovers. You really didn’t think anything of what we’ve been doing?”
Lena realizes that, just maybe, she wasn’t the best judge of what is and isn’t normal in a friendship. She also comes to the conclusion that she doesn’t want any of it to end.
“I..I thought this was normal? I didnt realize you were under the impression that we were dating. It seems that I have been a bit obtuse as to the status of our relationship.”
Kara is almost horrified at their months long miscommunication. The blonde sees no smooth way out of the situation and so begins what could have turned out to be the ramble of the century.
“So what, do we just stop? I’m sorry, I just thought we were taking it slow. Forgive me, if I had known—if I knew…I’m, I’m so sorry Lena, I’ll just go, and we can forget this ever happened—”
“NO!”
“No? Okay, I’ll give you some space—”
“No, Kara. I don’t want space. I don’t want anything to change. I want the dates, and the cuddling, and the kissing, and nights out with our friends. I want everything with you, Kara,” says Lena, as she reaches to grasp Kara face between her hands.
Kara leans into the touch, slowly gravitating closer to where Lena sits on her couch. Even as Kara grows closer, she hesitates to close the final distance between their lips. She couldn’t bear for Lena to dangle this opportunity between them.
“You do, are you sure?”
Lena decides that her next actions will speak louder than any platitudes she could give to Kara. With a push at Kara’s chest guiding her to lean back, Lena crawls into Kara’s lap, grasps Kara by the back of her neck, and leans down to place the slowest, sweetest kiss to Kara’s lips.
Not one to be outdone, Kara trails her hands along the sides of Lena’s thighs and up her back. Her left hand continues up to tangle into Lena’s hair while the right slides down to grasp Lena firmly by the ass.
With a small gasp, Lena deepens the kiss. With a gentle prod of her tongue to Kara’s lips, Lena licks into Kara’s mouth with a skillful tongue. With a groan, Kara separates their kiss.
“So, does this mean you’re my girlfriend?”
The brunette throws her head back in a joyful laugh.
“Yes, darling. I’ll be yours if you promise to be mine.”
Kara’s face lights up in happiness.
**********************
Months have gone by and Kara and Lena are happier than ever. Somehow they have grown closer, and although they have to deal with constant teasing remarks from all their friends, they wouldn’t separate for anything.
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thatdeadaquarius · 7 months ago
Note
Topic: Genshin impact.
au: Sagau.
idea: So what if you had the powers of every character you played as in every game you played and then get isekaid into genshin impact with imposter au. I imagine it goes smth like
Zhongli: “I will have order!”
reader, Who played Roblox as someone who lagged the game (explanation: I’m pretty sure ping is also how time works in games. If you can control the flow of ping you can control the flow of time in games.): “ZA WARUDO!”
Heyyy!! Thanks for waiting for the reply/response from my slow ass :0
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So they did clarify what they meant/expand so imma just copy paste that here!
“k now I remember. So basically imma write it here since it’s easier: Basically you don’t have to (but you can) transform into the character that has those set of powers but if you do those powers are enhanced.”
Sun: Reader (”you”/they/them)
Orbit: Headcanons-ish, Light Imposter AU (as in, NOT Yandere/Dark), mild crossover elements bc Shapeshifter Shenanigans™️
Stars: bro idek
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cussing, genshin typical mild violence, & Trigger Warnings: none known.
Please comment if I missed any. /gen
so fair warning,, ive never seen jojo bizarre, but i appreciate i come off well-read/watched? LMAO
so im just gonna kinda,, guess? like just cycle thru diff. random media, and im hoping both me and you reading this will have a fun time (as this is a little challenge, but i like it so ill give it a shot, dont kno if its a good one but- 😅)
so to set the scene, of how u got to this point, ykno of running like ur life (maybe?) depends on u running around different teyvat countries,
u thought it was weird everyone knew a little too much about you?? (ofc theyve heard u during gaming, they know u the same way we all know Markiplier, get it?)
then a bunch of NPCs/Vision users/Archons?? were REALLY invested in talking to you, which freaked u out even more
and by the time you saw Zhongli, yknow, just the oldest god in game, making a fast-walk towards you, ykno the retired god who didnt move an inch when an old water god attacked Liyue for a test, is now hurrying to you???
ur logically get so fucking scared sm shits abt to go down, u just start running
it isnt until ur reaching for a ledge and some webbing shoots out of ur arm (from a glitchy little spot on ur arm, where it could be coming out of ur skin, but sometimes its a blue and red bracelet)
it latched onto the nearest building, and thats how u find out u can grapple ur way, literally Spiderman style, out of the harbor
and bro, idk if it would be fun, or confusing and stressful, or maybe both?? to just find out u can use any video game power from any game youve played before as you go running from countries bc for some freaky reason they know too much abt you/are pursuing you-
dUDE- they had small statues of you in like every little section of their cities
u head to Mondstadt and as Venti comes screaming and flying at you (in excitement, but ur freaked), u go to hold a hand up and suddenly ur holding a heavy stone tablet that unleashes some holographic yellow chains that freeze him in place-?? why is this familiar-
oh my god u have the sheikah slate from Breath of the Wild,
and as ur booking it out of there, u manage to get ahold of a sword, and u know exactly how to use it to knock back favonius knights trying to stop you (they are concerned for their god who is just unleashing random powers on ppl, pls let Grandmaster Jean just talk to you Your Majesty-!!)
by the time you teleport ur way to Inazuma, (bc u still have this worlds access to ur player/traveler’s powers), ur trying to find a nice place to stay for a little bit
at least in that sweet spot of the Raiden not noticing/finding you, while things cool down on the main continent, before moving on,
and u get some tools to help fashion just a little shelter, bc u dont have any money/mora rn, and ur able to literally build a house???
a mailbox pops up and thanks you for renting with Tom Nook???? As in Animal Crossing-
and rlly if the BOTW/slate thing didnt clue u into video game powers, then this definitely would tbh lmao
right as u see Yae Miko circling ur house, with an armful of books? ..is she planning to thru them at you??, u get the hell out of dodge before her favorite god can follow along
(she knows ur prefrences in books and got authors/trends to start so youd have plenty to read, and she was making sure it was ur house before politely dropping them off! how was she to know thatd spook their favorite God, Ei?!)
u get to Sumeru and think ur safe, hiding in an abandoned forest watcher outpost (1 person treehouse rlly) when Nahida shows up in ur dreams,
and u just,
walk out of the dream, into reality, and possess a nearby ruin guard so u can sleep in peace, bc she cant access a robot,
that one baffled u as you re-possessed ur own body before realizing-
Five Nights at Freddy’s. 💀
U cant do that forever, so u try Fontaine, hoping Neuvillette/Furina wont rlly give af abt you, plus theyre the latest region, so maybe they have the least exposure to whatever the other archons didnt like abt you??
u get there and are immediately summoned to court, and right as the mekas show up to escort you, jfc they have a mecha army
(meanwhile, theyre thinking, yknow. high profile guest/our god of gods. ofc we need state of the art mekas to escort them, its only polite-)
meanwhile ur cape has now become wings, and a mask covers ur face as you glide and fly ur way over the city in an attempt to get to where u assume Snezhnaya is
it doesnt occur to you the game until ur running out of stamnia and catch ur reflection in the waters of fontaine, Sky: Children of the Light
u hope the Tsaritsa’s dislike for other gods/Celestia doesnt extend to ur otherworldly presence so ur just hoping for the best atp tbh
tbh youd forget what all powers you have, and the absolute chaos ur causing urself as u try to desperately rememeber what games youve played thru ur entire life is NOT helping to reduce confusion when u randomly wake up with elf ears (legend of zelda/botw) or get dragged into another ruin machine when u fall asleep/faint/do smth u guess mimics death lmao- (fnaf) 💀
(meanwhile the Tsaritsa does get wind ur coming this way, and just, makes the people have a parade/festival to celebrate you coming,
she did also have to get Pierro/Captaino to physically restrain some of them from going ahead to meet/escort you to the palace, she’d heard how the others scared u off, and was, ironically, hoping the warm welcome would clear things up)
well that was, something. 😃🫠
sorry lil car, that was such a fun idea idk if i did it justice!! i thought itd be too op to include every media youve consumed ever, so i kept it to video games, (which, could u cheat the system if youve played smash bros??)
i hope it was at least a decent read, and sorry im half asleep so i was not v funny this time around, but, again, hope u got smth out of it 😭
</3
on another note, im having my wisdom teeth surgery this friday, send whatever u got my way, prayers, blessings, good vibes, ill take anything im nervous 🙃
have a good week guys!
Safe Travels Lil Car,
💀♒
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If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"
(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit / @chinuneko / @silvers-tongue
If ur tag doesnt work, pls check ur settings to see if ur a "searchable blog"!! Its not the same as the Ai selling data thing.
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maedae-maedae · 5 months ago
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Your Hands All Over My Guilty Conscience
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☆ Okkotsu Yuuta x F!Reader
☆ Chapter 1/7
☆ Genre: Fluff & Smut, Mutual Pining
☆ Warnings: NSFW 18+
☆ Contents: Aged-Up Characters, College AU, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, Obsession, Loyalty, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Drinking, House Party, Masturbation
☆ Word Count: 10.6k
☆ Summary: Linked at the hip as best friends since birth, you and Yuta have never once not been at eachother's side. Anyone who knew one of you, had to know the other. You made quite the reputation for yourselfs as an inseparable duo, throughout all your school years together. Yuta was committed to keep things this way, despite his secret feelings for you. He was strong-willed, keeping his longing emotions reined in and your relationship stable just the way it is.
But once the two of you graduate and enter university, this proves to be more difficult than Yuta anticipated. He finds himself in a whole other playing field. One that forces him to see and confront his feelings for you head-on. His once clean consciences regarding you, starts becoming more and more tainted. And worse, uni only seems to pull the two of you apart, something neither of you are used to. What is he supposed to do with all these new experiences and deep yearning for you?
☆ A/N: i actually wrote this chapter a while ago but didnt want to share until i had more planned out and written! hopefully next chapter is soon but this first one is probably longer than the ones following will be! think of it like a detailed opening introduction to the story.
warning: this story switches from fluff to smut/perverted a lot. might throw you off at times. also, HEAVY on the obsession tag. youre both obsessed with eachother but i really went over the top to express how crazy yuta is for you. hehe
Read on AO3
—————————————————
Chapter 1 - Firsts
Yuta has a guilty conscience.
He’s known he was in love with you since high school. And aside from the painfulness that comes with an unreciprocated crush, he actually didn’t mind his feelings. He liked being head over heels for you. It was a privilege, he thought, to get to love you, even just to know you.
The two of you have been glued by the hip since birth practically. Your mom’s were best friends and somehow ended up pregnant at the same time, basically raising you two together. It really shouldn’t be a surprise the way he feels, after having you by his side all this time, how could he ever love someone else as deeply as he does you?
You were popular in high school, and people would only really acknowledge him in the way it related to you. “Y/n’s friend”. “That guy thats always with Y/n.” And, Yutas personal favorite, “Y/n’s boyfriend.” That one was always used in a way to tease you, and you would always refute it and scold whoever said it. But deep down it made him happy to be called that, and maybe that’s why. Maybe that’s why at some point he started doing things in the hallways or the lunchroom to enforce that rumor. Very subtle physical affection that he was known for doing with you at this point. Fingers gently entangling with yours while the two of you talk about something by the window. It’s so gentle that you don’t even notice or mind, but anyone who was looking at you could see that you’re obviously holding hands, albeit weakly. The need to always be touching you in some way when you were together. Shoulders slumped into eachother while sitting together, pinkies wrapped while you sit on the school grass with friends, his hands grazing against yours when you walk side by side. He could never get enough of the little things. And yeah he did it for the rumors, so everyone would know that even if it wasn’t official, you were his. You were claimed already. No one could be this close with you and get away with it. But when you two were alone it was even better.
Yuta's love language was most definitely physical touch. You’ve always known that he likes to be physical, and that was just his way of showing he liked you. Platonically, in your eyes. When you’d hang out at each others house, he was still always connected with you in some way. Head in your lap as the two of you talk about some drama in your class. Arms around you from behind with his head on your shoulder as you finish a level of a game he already died in. Legs entangled in various ways under the kotatsu as you both do homework. It took many forms. It never bothered you luckily, in fact you’d long become accustomed to it. Even as kids Yuta was the same, and your moms used to eat it up and say you two would be married someday, taking a thousand one pictures of you for that reason.
It really was all innocence until sometime in high school when he had developed feelings. His physical affection never changed but the feeling and motive behind it might’ve. And sometimes he quite literally couldn't do some of the stuff he used to do when you were younger, because it would most definitely give him away now.
He’ll never forget the day it really changed for him. Playing video games with his arms around you like normal, but it wasn’t normal this time. His heart was beating, he was nervous. Looking up at you from your shoulder, he couldn’t get over how you look pretty from every angle. How cute were your reactions to every hit of damage you take in the game. Suddenly he’s incredibly aware of where his hands are sitting, how close you are, your warmth, your breathing, how good you smell. Something in his awareness heightens, like the flick of a switch, and he realizes that this is different. Different to what he thought it was. He also realizes how bad that is, and it makes his stomach drop. He went home early that day, but nothing ever changed. Only the way he felt.
After that day Yuta knew he had to be mindful with the way he acted with you, and even in the way he thought of you. He allowed himself to have loving thoughts of you, for they could always be rationalized in someway to be friendly. “You’re so pretty” could be followed by “so I cant believe none of the guys in class have confessed to you yet.” and “You have the most precious laugh” could be backed by “its no wonder why you have so many friends”. Stuff like that. What he wouldn’t allow and actively tried to avoid, were thoughts that could not possibly be platonic in any use of the word. Like sexual thoughts.
It was only natural. After becoming aware of his feelings and with the effects of maturing into a young adult he was bound to have thoughts like this. But he wouldn’t allow it, not even in your absence, in his own privacy. Of course he couldn’t fight sexual urges all together, but he did his very best not to think of you when he was doing something like that. And Yuta was very good at self-discipline, the reason why his test scores are the best in your grade. He was successful in pushing the thoughts away, avoiding seeing you in this new forbidden light. For a long time.
And everything was fine. You never suspected a thing from him, your friendship never changed, and you even ended up enrolling in the same university.
That’s where his trouble started.
College is a totally different experience from high school that he wasn’t quite expecting. And everything has been taking a toll on him lately.
When the two of you first start, everything’s fine. You already know a bunch of freshman from your school, but you’re also easy to make friends with a bunch of other people as well. Yuta mostly stays with your smaller friend group that you two had in highschool. Inumaki and Panda got into the same Uni as well, not to mention the boys ended up living together.
And Yuta has no real issue with you making new friends at all, of course he’s happy for you. You still like to have him with you all the time, even if you don’t have many classes together. So long as he can still have time with you, he’s happy. What starts to bother him is the way the guys around you stare. Men in uni are much different from high school. And most of the guys here have no idea about the rumors of you two, all his years of showing such a thing are now practically worthless. You don’t notice, but he always does. He hated the way they stare, as if undressing you with their disrespectful eyes, grinning and whispering to friends, probably making sly comments he can’t hear when they shouldn’t even have the right to take the slightest glance in your direction.
“Yuta?” You call to him from where you sit next to him in the dining hall. He just now realizes that he’d been staring down these two guys a couple tables away in his peripheral vision.
“Huh? Yeah?” He calls back to you, turning to look at you now.
“Is something wrong?“
“Huh? No, nothing.”
“Oh, okay… well, did you hear what I said?” You ask and his heart sinks a little. He wasn’t listening, he didnt even realize you were talking to him.
“No.. I’m sorry. Tell me again?” He offers, giving you his full attention now. You give him a smile at hearing his usual sweet tone of voice when he speaks to you. You love everything about the way he is with you.
“I was talking about a party I got invited to-“
“You were invited to a party?? But-“
“Yu, let me finish.” You tell him before he can start lecturing you about it being dangerous or something, as you’re positive he was going to. He pouts a little. Cute.
“It’s for freshman. An upperclassman invited me so I think it’s for all years, but I guess it’s more of a welcoming party.” You explain and Yuta only frowns more. Since when did you make friends with an upperclassman? He’s never seen you with one. And the thought of you being at a party with a bunch of drunk guys or just drunk people in general makes him nervous.
His fingers automatically find yours under the table. Without thinking he finds a way to connect with you. It may have been to calm himself down, or maybe to get your attention again so you could see that he’s clearly uncertain about this idea. He couldn’t say. It does get your attention though, and you give him a look of understanding as your fingers intertwine a bit more.
“I know college parties can be kinda crazy and all that, and I wouldn’t want to go alone anyways even if they weren’t. They said I could invite whoever I wanted so.. You guys wanna come?”
“Sure, I’m down.” Inumaki says, and Yuta had almost forgot his friends were there for a second.
“Oh, yeah! Our first college party! I’ll be there.” Panda grins and you smile at their agreement. Your gaze returns to Yuta again, and his to yours.
“I’m.. not really into parties but..” He starts and you look like you’re anticipating his agreement. “If you wanna go, of course I’ll go with you.”
You smile at him, sweet as ever. But you do feel a bit bad about the possibility that you’re forcing him. As much as you want him there, you don’t want him to be miserable going with you.
“You don’t have to, y’know. Just because I’m going. I wont make you.” You remind him and he smiles too now, nodding.
“I know. I want to.” He reassures you and you feel relieved at that. “Plus, I want to make sure you guys are all safe. It’s better to go with a group to stuff like this and have someone to look over everyone.”
“You don’t have to worry about me.” Inumaki tells him. “I can’t drink.”
Right, Inumaki has a chronic condition that makes his throat very sensitive, of course he wouldn’t be allowed alcohol.
“And I have a high tolerance! I’ll be fine.” Panda informs too, and you all look at him like you’re suspicious of how he even knows that. He just smiles.
“Well, still. Being in one place with a ton of drunk people is dangerous on its own.” Yuta says anyways, going back to picking at his food.
You give him a knowing look.
“You can just admit you wanna come and have fun. It’s okay, we wont judge you.” You tease and the other two chuckle a bit.
“Well, maybe.” Yuta gives after a second of embarrassment by your call out. “But I’m mostly going for the other reason.”
You laugh at how cute he is, squeezing his hand before letting it go to hug him. He blushes in concession with both your adorable laugh and your warm embrace. His two friend wiggle their eyebrows at him as your back is to them and Yuta rolls his eyes at them. They are always contempt to tease him in silence. Yuta never even told them about how he feels, but he knows they just know. And he doesn’t mind. As long as it doesn’t get to you.
Agreeing to go to this party with you was probably both the best and worst thing he could’ve done. It would’ve been better if he could’ve talked you out of coming, but he knew from the beginning that wouldn’t be an option, and he wouldn’t want to control you.
When you first get there, the four of you are a bit awkward. Panda offers to take your first ever shot with you and somehow Yuta even agrees to do “just the one”. You take the hit pretty well, but you all burst out laughing when Yuta makes the most disgusted expression you’ve ever seen on him.
It’s sweet, even if embarrassing, the two of you having “first” moments together like this. It’s not long before your two friends are nowhere to be found, and Yuta can assume why they left you two alone. It’s also not long after that you’re convincing him to take another couple of shots with you, even though he hated the first one, he loved having these moments with you. He’d do anything with you. Even follow you to the center of the room to dance when he’s always known he’s not the best dancer.
When you’re dancing, quite a few people come up to you to talk, even just to say hello. You really know a lot of people. But it doesn’t bother him at all because even with everyone that comes by, you never once let go of his hand. And when your attention isn’t on him, he can freely admire you as much as he wants without having to be cautious about the way he looks at you.
He knows the alcohol is catching up to him a little when he starts to get needy. Any kind of connection with you is enough for him on a normal day, but right now he has the urge to be all over you, and it’s taking everything in him to keep it subtle.
You’re still talking to some girl he’s maybe seen a few times— he can’t recall, when he decides he needs your attention again. He pulls your hand towards him, but it doesn’t deter you from the loud  conversation you’re having, much more than a quick glance at him. On the inside it feels like he could start whining, begging for you to look at him, be with him in this moment. The music isn’t helping either, some seductive rnb song with vulgar lyrics pumping in his ears. He does something he’s never done before, without much thought to it either. His free hand reaches out and grabs your waist, gripping you tightly and pulling you towards him. You gasp and look at him with surprise. Even more surprised when you see the longing expression on his face. Your friend seemingly understands and leaves you two be, to Yutas relief.
He can’t stand the embarrassment he feels with the way you’re looking at him, but he also can’t bare to be apart from you at all anymore. He pulls you in, his arms wrapping around you, hands resting in a dangerous area. Any lower and this couldn’t be considered platonic at all. He bends over a bit so his head can nuzzle into your neck. He wants to feel you, all of you, even more than this. But he stops here.
“Yu…?” You say in a bit of a confused tone, right in his ear. A chill runs down his spine. Your hands had already come up to wrap around him as well, rubbing his back in a way that made him feel so warm.
“Mmve you.” He mumbles and he doesn’t even know what he’s saying anymore.
“Hm?” You ask for him to clarify, voice smooth like honey, but he doesn’t say anything else. The two of you stay like that, starting to rock to the music when it’s clear that this is not just a hug.
It’s not like you look out of place at all, there are plenty of people around you doing something similar, even straight up making out.
“Yu.. look at me.” You tell him and he can’t help but comply. His head lifts up from your shoulder and he stands up a bit straighter to look at you.
“You okay??” You ask him sweetly and his heart races looking into your eyes. It’s too much for him. This is all too much.
He nods anyways, eyes closing and forehead coming to rest against yours.
He thinks you must be at least a little drunk too by the way your hands start to caress his back and sides. But he doesn’t even think about what you might be thinking about him being so clingy like this. He knows you don’t mind, that you understand, you always understand him. He loves you for it.
“You drunk already? Hmm??” You say and he doesn’t have to be looking at you to hear the smirk in your voice.
“I mean I expected it but you’re really a lightweight, huh?” You say to him and this time he opens his eyes to see you smiling.
“Of course I am.. this is my first time drinking.” Yuta says in basically a whine. Your heart races.
The thing Yuta doesn’t know, is that you’re obviously just as needy for him right now. You don’t think the alcohol has really gotten to you that much, and thank god for that honestly. But you love seeing him like this, it’s making you feel all types of things about him.
There’s a silence as he frowns. You tilt your head as if saying “what?” to him.
“I need to use the bathroom.” He tells you so bluntly that it makes you laugh. But before you know it you’re leading him to the bathroom, guiding him by the hand. Truth is, you don’t know where it is either, you’ve never been here. But you feel a sort of need to take charge for some reason. You find it pretty quickly anyways, and tell him you’ll wait outside.
Relieving himself proves difficult after having gotten half hard from what just happened. He’s lucky you didnt feel it, or maybe you did and you didn’t say anything. Who knows? Eventually he figures it out and gets back outside.
His heart sinks when he doesn’t see you. Glancing around frantically, he tries to look for any sight of you. Red, you were wearing red, that and any of your features that he’s so familiar with would be impossible to miss. He starts pushing past people, anxiously looking for where you might’ve gone. It’s maybe 20 minutes later when he finally finds you, in the kitchen. After the relief washes over him, he realizes that the anxiety looking for you definitely sobered him up already.
He wasn’t able to see at first, someone blocking his view, but as he moves further into the kitchen, he catches it. A guy talking to you, but not just any guy, the guy from the lunch room the other day.
His dirty mouth probably having said disgusting things about you—that you’re totally unaware of, yapping away at you as you nod at him.
No. He wont have it.
He continues to push past people, small apologizes leaving his mouth all the same even with all the anger running through him right now. You’re surprised when he grabs your wrist, even though he’s still gentle about it, it comes so suddenly.
“Oh! Yuta, you-“
“Where’d you go?” He asks immediately, as if scolding you.
“Huh? Where’d I.. oh! My friend pulled me away I- oh but I told someone waiting in line to tell you where I went did they not tell you?”
“No. No one told me.” He states coldly and you frown.
“Oh. Sorry..” You say but realize that now he’s glaring at the guy you were just talking to. “Oh, yeah, this is-“
“Don’t care.” He mutters and before you can say anything, he’s pulling you back towards the living room from where he came in. His pull isn’t harsh, you could easily refute, but you follow him anyways.
He leads you away until you’re in the corner of the room, away from the speakers where it’s a bit quieter.
“Wha was that? Kinda rude, Yu.” You say, confused, and now significantly more disoriented. Your friends had pulled you away for a drinking game, and Yuta was in the bathroom for a bit.
“You said you would wait outside.” He says, almost like pouting, but his expression is stern and serious.
“Yeah but you were taking foreverrr.” You tease, giving him a silly smile. “What were you even doing in there, huh?”
“That doesn’t matter, you scared me! I told you places like this are dangerous for-“ He starts to lecture you, but cuts himself off to focus on you for a second. It finally starts to click for him that you aren’t in the same state he left you in. Your eyes are lazy, kind of wandering. Your body swaying and unbalanced. And just from knowing how your body language usually is, he knows something is really off.
“Did you drink more while I was in the bathroom?” He asks.
“Yeah.” You tell him honestly, not seeing any reason to hide it.
“How much?”
“Ummmm….”
“You don’t know?!”
“I’m thinking!!”
You put your finger to your lips and start working your brain to remember, counting off the number in your head.
“Y/n, you’re scaring me.” Yuta says as it takes you longer than he thinks it should to answer.
“It was like.. four.. actually, five.”
“Five what?”
“Shots.”
“Of what??”
“Um.. alcohol?”
“You don’t even know what they were giving you?” Yuta stares at you in complete disbelief.
“Well, they didn’t tell me, so..” You mumble a reply, feeling guilty now like you must have made a mistake. “Does it really matter?”
“Y/n!” Yuta says as if scolding you, again.
“What? It was a game, we were all just having fun!!” You retort.
“You can’t just take any drink anyone gives you! I cant believe I have to tell you that.” He says, crossing his arms.
“They’re not just anyone they’re my friends!” You retort again, frowning at him.
“I’m your friend. You hardly know these people!” He argues without hesitation and something in you hurts at those words. 
“Yu…”
“And what’s in that, then?” He inquires, pointing down, and— up until now you totally forgot the red cup in your hand. Oh, make that 6(?) drinks you guess.
“It’s mango juice and… vodka.” You tell him warily, knowing you have no clue what kind of alcohol it actually is. But you can’t lie to his face, you know you can’t. “…Probably.”
“Probably?!”
“Yu!! Stop worrying! Look, I’m fine! I’m safe! And I have you here, so iss okay.” You tell him genuinely and Yuta’s heart pangs. Knowing you have so much security and trust in him to know you’ll be safe as long as he’s here, makes him incessantly happy. But he just doesn’t trust the people here, and god forbid he lose you again.
“Y/n, let’s go home.” He tells you as nicely as he can.
“What? No, I’m having fun.” You tell him to his dismay and he frowns. He really doesn’t want to argue with you.
“Please. The alcohol you had probably hasn’t even really caught up with you yet. We should get you home before it does.”
“Yu, I’m not leaving. I came to have a good time.” You tell him again firmly and he basically pouts at this. “Cmon. I wanna have a good time with you too. Let’s go dance again.”
You entice him, your hand finding his for the millionth time, that look in your eyes as you stare up at him. You have to know what you do to him, right?
“…Alright.” He agrees and your smile spreads into a grin, practically jumping in place with excitement and victory at convincing him.
“But!” He interrupts, putting his finger up and making you go still again. “No more drinking for the night.” 
“Whattt?” You frown and protest as he takes the cup that was basically empty anyways out of your hands.
“You’ve had a lot already for your first time and I don’t want you to get sick. Let’s just hang out for the rest of the time, okay?”
You pout as he waits for your compliance to his terms. You think about how likely it would be for him to actually carry you out of here if you didn’t.
“Promise me? Please?” He says sweetly, looking into your eyes as if further asking with them. You cant say no to him like this.
“Fine.” You tell him and you adore the way he smiles afterward. “For you.”
After that, the two of you are back in the middle of where everyone else is dancing. This time he isn’t really intoxicated at all and maybe that’s why he’s not so needy. Your other friends come to join with you, even inumaki and panda as well. He sees you having a good time and that’s enough for him to have a good time too. Though he supposes he’s also just having fun dancing and being young with everyone like this.
The night about peaks there.
After dancing a bit, you lean into Yuta’s ear to tell him you’re gonna go get water for the two of you. You’re basically yelling since you guys are dancing pretty close to the speakers this time. When Yuta finally understands you he shoots you a concerned look. You roll your eyes.
“You trust meee, right?” You say again into his ear. He nods without hesitating. Of course he trusts you.
“I’m just getting water, promise.” You tell him again. “I’ll be back.”
Before he can offer to get it instead, you’re gone.
He watches you go, snaking your way through people toward the kitchen. He feels a bit awkward with you gone now, like it’s not as fun in your absence. Still he watches your friends and his dance along together, and he can’t help smiling at them.
After a minute he feels a hand on his arm, and he looks over, thinking it’s you. It’s a girl he’s never seen before. Or at least he thinks he hasn’t. She’s mouthing something at him, probably talking at normal volume, but he can’t hear obviously.
“Sorry, what? I can’t hear you!” He shouts over the music and she beckons him with her hand to come closer. He complies, not really thinking much of it. She must have something to tell him. Maybe it’s about you?
When he does lean in, shes so close he can feel her breathing. It’s weird, being this close to someone else and it almost feels wrong. She just starts a normal conversation with him, asking where he’s from and what year he is. It seems normal and Yuta talks along with her, thinking it a little strange to be having a normal conversation somewhere so inconvenient. But he’s polite about it. She keeps talking, and all Yuta can think about is where you are. Would it take this long to get water? No, but, he trusts you. He doesn’t need to worry.
“Are you okay?” The girl asks and he snaps back to the current moment again.
“H-huh? Oh, yeah.” He yells back, as they’ve been doing for a few minutes.
She says something like he’s very cute, or that’s what he thinks she said. When it’s clear he didn’t properly hear her, she pulls him close, forcefully by his shirt. It’s when she starts saying things in his ear that are obviously flirting now that he finally sees you out of the corner of his eye. You look shocked but, hey, you do have two cups of water with you.
You start talking to the girl, back and forth, the two of you talking quickly about something he’s not quite hearing.
Something something- you. Something something- your boyfriend? Something something- just leave something alone.
Then they start getting louder, and he starts to hear better. This is also where he starts to realize you’re not just talking to her, you’re arguing with her.
“Why do you even care? _____ jealous?” The other girl says, parts of what she’s saying still kind of blank. The two of them are clearly angry now. Even your friends are starting to wonder whats going on.
“Excuse me? Who even are you? You ____ and then ____?!”
From there it all happens so quickly, Yuta barely has time to process it all. He knows how you get when you’re angry, he’s seen you argue with girls and even guys from your school before. Hell, even when you were kids you used to get into fights with other kids who would bully him until they stopped. It’s not that you look for a fight, or that you’re easy to get upset at all, but when you do you’re a hundred percent with it. You don’t waver or back down, as long as you believe you’re in the right. But, what could this girl have possibly done to make you so mad? And what’s gonna happen when how you usually are in an arguement is boosted with the effects of being intoxicated?
He has no time to prevent it at all. Voices get louder, you both get closer. Then he hears the other girl say “Oh, why don’t we test that then, huh?”
She turns to him, calls something out to him, but he just continues to stand there, very confused. Suddenly her hands are reaching up for him, taking his face in her hands and pulling him towards her own. Again, this is all happening too fast for Yuta to process. He only realizes shes about to kiss him when all at once the girl is now drenched in water, some of the splash bouncing off and hitting him as well. She freezes to look down at herself in shock, and Yuta stares with eyes wide. He’s too late to look at you because when he does, you’re already lunging at her, shoving her towards the wall with no remorse.
He’s quick to act this time as you’re about to go after her for more, arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you back as you actively squirm and yell for him to let you go. It’s to his dismay when he sees the other girl coming towards you now rather than leaving. Your other friends join in to help in holding the both of you back. It’s a bit of a struggle to get you two apart, but before he knows it, Yuta and the other boys have successfully gotten you away. Which happened to be upstairs, since the girls were taking the other girl outside.
Thankfully it didn’t cause too big of a scene. People around had stopped to look and see what was going on, but once the fight was prevented, everything went back to normal.
“What the hell was that?! What happened?!” Panda shouts at you as you’re still panting from all the struggle to get out of the hold of the three boys that now stand around you in some random bedroom. You’re on the bed, and Yuta sits next to you. You don’t even want to look at him.
“What did she say??” Inumaki adds.
“Are you okay?” Yuta also adds, sweetly more concerned about that than anything.
“I’m fine.” You say in a tone that indicates you are infact not.
“Oh, sure, answer Yuta but not us.” Panda says, rolling his eyes. “Can we get an explanation?”
“Guys. Cmon. That was obviously a lot. She needs time to process.” Yuta says in your defense and it’s honestly hard to stay mad at him, though you’re not even quite sure why you are. You’re feeling a lot of things right now.
The three of them go back and forth a bit and you’re not having it, already upset enough.
“Can you guys jush leave me alone!!” You shout and again, you’re not even sure why. You don’t want to be alone.
“…What?” Yuta says, almost like in disbelief, and you turn to see his sad expression. Something on your heart tugs. You don’t think you’ve ever asked Yuta to leave you alone. He was always around to help you even in your lowest times, even when it was the two of you who fought.
You hear a sigh from Inumaki.
“Alright, we get it, we’ll leave you two alone. Lovebirds.” He says, muttering the last part. You blush slightly, they totally read through you just now.
“We expect an explanation later though!” Panda calls on their way out. The two of you stare at the door for a moment after.
When Yuta finally turns back at you, he’s genuinely surprised to see you look so angry. Were you mad at him?
“What’s… going on? What happened back there?” He asks you gently, cautiously.
“Yuta you are so clueless!!” You shout at him suddenly, making him jump.
“H-huh?!”
“You didn’t notice?! She was flirting with you!” You say and push his chest, too gentle to actually be real anger.
“What?? I mean.. well I kind of noticed, eventually…” he says sheepishly, a bit confused. “Why does it matter?”
He watches your face heat up and you quickly look away from him.
“Oh my god,” you say, putting your face in your hands. “You make me feel crazy.”
“Huh?” Yuta mumbles again and then he suddenly remembers that you’re still drunk. He goes to touch your arm but you snap back around at him before he can.
“She was trying to kiss you!!” You shout and he nods in surprise.
“I know!” He confirms and his heart speeds up when he realizes that was clearly not the thing to say. You suddenly look sad instead of mad, and it breaks his heart.
“I-It’s not like I wanted her to. It happened so fast I-“
“Yeah right, when I got there she was all over you! You’ve always been clueless!! It’s like this any time any girl flirts with you! In highschool too.”
…what?
When Yuta looks back on tonight, it was obvious that girl was flirting with him, sure, even if he did notice kind of late. But high school? He never had girls who flirted with him, not that he can think of.
“What.. do you mean? I was never hit on in high school.”
“Yeah, that’s what you think.” You say, poking his chest. “That’s my point.”
This is troubling for him as he starts to really analyze anytime any girl might of flirted with him in the past. No matter how hard he thinks, he can’t even think of one.
Then he realizes something. What… does this have to do with anything? So you were mad that that girl was flirting with him. Got that. But why? There’s really only one answer right? But there’s no way… it has to be in a platonic way, right? Jealousy.
He snaps out of his thoughts suddenly when he hears a familiar sniffle, and his awareness lights up, like an instinct. You’re crying. You’re crying right next to him, and it seems like it’s his fault. His heart aches and he immediately pulls you into an embrace, quietly cooing soft affirming words and apologies, rubbing your back. He remembers AGAIN, the fact that you are very drunk, and of course your actions are not going to completely make sense to him or anyone. People do unreasonable things when they’re drunk right? Things they’d never think of doing sober. So, he decides to just comfort you and assure you rather than argue or try to understand anymore.
You stay like this, gently crying into his chest and gripping his shirt as he holds you, his chin resting on your head. He knows exactly when you need this kind of comforting, and he’s very happy to give it to you. You go quiet after a few minutes, and he doesn’t pull back until you quietly call his name.
“Yuta.” You say, slightly muffled.
“Mm?” He hums as he softly pulls back to look at you.
You look up at him, eyes wet and face tinted pink, an absolute painting of purity underneath him.
“We should kiss.” You tell him, completely genuine.
“h-hUH?!” He squeaks and the crack in his voice does not help his face that immediately turned red at your words.
“You don’t want to?” You say sadly and this feels like some kind of test.
“No, I!- I mean… why… do you say that?” His words leave his mouth in a pathetic way that he hates, as if betraying him.
“It’s just…” You start sheepishly, and now you have to look away, embarrassed. “We’ve been together since we were kids.. we’ve done everything together. All the firsts. So…”
He watches as you breathe in and turn to look at him again, hanging on to every word you’re saying.
“Doesn’t it make sense that we should be eachothers first kiss too? It’d be weird to give it to anyone else… and you almost had someone take your first kiss tonight… that can happen too, so…”
You’re drunk. You’re drunk. You’re drunk. You’re drunk. You’re drunk. You’re drunk.
He has to hammer that into his head to not lose himself here. But even repeating it to himself over and over, he’s leaning in, and you’re leaning in. You’re so close, something he’s always wanted deep down is right in front of him, teasing, taunting him.
It takes everything in him to pull back again.
“I can’t…” He says, his eyes clenched shut.
“Why?”
“Because you’re drunk.”
“And?”
“And… it would be wrong…” he continues, really trying his best to keep composure here, and somewhat failing. His eyes shoot open when he feels you climb over him, coming to sit in his lap where your legs stratal him. Now this is something you two have never done. Your body is so warm on top of his, and your hands too when they come to rest against his chest. One hand comes up to brush a hair out of his eyes, then falling down to caress his cheek. He swallows hard.
What are you doing?
“This is about me?” You ask him curiously. Your sober self would be shocked by how easily you’re about to do something you’ve always dreamed of doing to Yuta specifically. You want to kiss him, of course, but you also want to tease him. You love to do so on a normal day, but you’ve been given quite the special opportunity with the current situation and your rise in confidence thanks to the drinks earlier.
“Yes.. b-but this is-“
“If it’s about me, then let’s just do it. I’m practically sober.” You lie to him, which you never do. You really want this.
“You’re not. You’re drunk, I can tell.” He calls your bluff even in his flustered state. You’re caught. You can’t really argue with him on that. Instead you bring your head down to lay on his shoulder, resting there for a moment. He sighs quietly in relief, thinking you’d given in, his arms coming in to hold you again. There’s a moment of peace.
A loud gasp leave his lips suddenly when you start pressing your lips to his neck. Softly, you place one by one, moving around to make sure to give him plenty. You feel like you’re on fire when you hear him start to moan at this. You knew he’d be the type to moan and whine, you know him. You want to hear more. You cant stop yourself.
“Ah.. Y/n..” he breathes as you kiss up to the nape of his ear and along his collar bone. You even come up to give his cheek a couple of pecks the way you think you must’ve when you were really little. My how times change, and yet not at all. All he can think about is how soft your lips are, trying to fight against is own pleasure.
“Y/n..” he says, strained, like he’s pleading you. “Really, we can’t do this… Please, stop.”
At his specific request for you to stop, you do. You pull back and look at him. His face is flushed like crazy and he looks so lusted. Yet he said no, and his hands stay put on your back. In fact, he’s not moved a muscle at all since you climbed onto him.
“You really don’t want to?” You ask, almost sadly.
“I already told you..” he trails off weakly, not able to look at you in the eyes. His face is really burning up. Honestly even he’s impressed with how much he’s able to hold back right now. Literally any other circumstance. Anywhere, anytime, he would give into you. But he would hate himself if tomorrow you said this was a mistake, or god forbid got angry at him for letting you do something in a state where your minds not right like this. You trusted him to keep you safe, and that includes from himself. He is a man after all, childhood best friend or otherwise. He’s doing this for you essentially, even though it’s ironically the opposite of what you want in the moment.
“If you’d rather have your first time with someone else, you can just say that.” You say, stubborn, frowning at him. What first are you talking about here?
“You know it’s not that-“
“Say you don’t want to and I’ll drop it.” You say sternly, giving him the hard choice. You don’t know how you got stuck on this, or even if your reasoning or actions were making sense. All you know is you want to kiss your best friend, and you want him to want it too.
He groans, almost a whine and you feel him squeeze your sides. You get excited for a moment, thinking he’ll give in.
“Fine... I… I don’t want to.” He says finally, and looking you in the eyes when he does so you know that he’s serious this time. He can’t even believe it himself, he knows that’s a huge lie. But it’s the only way to get you to stop apparently, and it’s for your own good. Plus, this is something he hasn’t even allowed himself to fantasize about, and now it’s happening right in front of him. He’s a little scared of what this might do to him, and more importantly, your relationship. He’s also unsure if he has the self control to stop after kissing you once. Cross that first line and there’s no telling where this will end up. Maybe that’s the real reason he knows he has to hold back for your sake. One kiss wouldn’t be so bad, after all.
You go from looking hurt, and then back to angry. You push yourself up off him, coming to stand.
“Fine. Then, maybe I should go get that girl. Since I obviously ruined what you two had going on.” You shoot at him, turning towards the door. Apparently being drunk really amplifies your jealousy, which is new to you. Usually you’re very good at hiding or completely ignoring it.
“Y/n, that’s crazy. Why would I want to kiss some girl I hardly know?”
“Well you clearly weren’t against it!” You say, turning to him again with your arms crossed.
“I didn’t notice! I don’t want to kiss her!” He insists.
“Whatever!” You head for the door again, hand taking the knob. You feel him grab your other hand.
“Y/n-“
“Let go!” You shout and try to pull your arms from his grasp to no avail.
“Please. Just stop. Listen to me.” He pleads, ignoring your squirming to pull you back to him. You finally look up at him, annoyed.
“You’re my best friend. I’ve had you for as long as I can remember, and you’re right. We’ve done everything together. It would be weird to have my first with anyone else, so… I actually think, what you said.. I think it’s a good idea. I want to do it.” He tells you quickly so that you’ll hear him out. You look at him a little surprised.
“Wha..? But you just-“
“I’ll tell you what…” He stops you before you can retaliate. “If you wake up tomorrow, when you’re sober, and you still want that first kiss.. I’ll do it.”
He tells you this and you immediately believe him. You know he will, he never goes back on his word. Still, your stubborn expression doesn’t waver much.
“I promise.” He says, squeezing your hand and giving you a genuine look. That does it. You let out a sigh.
Truth is, ever since standing up, you’ve felt kind of dizzy and gross. It’s been hard to even stay focused on what you were mad about.
You lean forward, dropping into Yuta’s chest, surprising him a little.
“I don’t feel good.” You say weakly and he chuckles.
“Let’s leave, yeah?” He suggests and you nod, following as he finally opens the door and leads you down the hall. He only stops in front of the stairs when you stop, pulling his arm by staying in place. He looks back at you, confused, but understands almost immediately after seeing you. He realizes now that he must’ve underestimated just how “not good” you felt.
He takes you back towards the bathroom, gently, but with urgency. You make it there and luckily there’s no line either. He guides you in with a hand on your back, shutting and locking the door after you.
Honestly you don’t know why but you’re embarrassed by what he’s about to see. It’s not like he hasn’t seen you in terrible states before, sick, or sobbing, or depressed. But this is just, humiliating for some reason, especially after what just happened. Though it could be worse.
He of course pulls your hair back as you let it out into the toilet. He hates hearing your sounds of pain and he’s pretty sure he hears you crying as well. He wishes he could help more, but once he thinks you’re done he just gently rubs your back for a while.
“Sorry..” you mumble to him without moving and he shakes his head immediately.
“You have nothing to be sorry about.” He reassures you.
I love you. I would do this for you everytime. Is what he wishes he could say. And he so badly wants to think about everything that just happened in that bedroom, to replay it in his mind and ask questions. But he knows to save it for later. Your condition is more important right now.
Eventually people outside need to use the restroom, and it seems like you’re not going to throw up anymore, so Yuta helps you up and outside. But even then, you feel too weak to stand and you decide to sit against the hallway wall. He takes a seat next to you without question. He sits with you for a while, even after your head falls onto his shoulder and he can tell that you’re asleep.
Panda and Inumaki find you and suggest leaving, so Yuta knows he has to wake you. He shakes you slightly by the shoulder.
“Hey..” he says softly when you groan and blink your eyes a couple times hazily.
“Think you can stand?” He asks you.
You groan and nuzzle further into his shoulder.
“Mdont wantto.” You mumble into him and he smiles.
“Alright, I’m gonna carry you then, okay?” He tells you and you just hum in response.
Eventually you’re on Yuta’s back, walking outside around your school campus to get to his apartment. Most of its a blur as you fall in and out of sleep through the whole walk.
Yuta tells the two very eager-to-know boys about what he thinks happened with you and that girl, but not much about what came after with him. They say the same things his brain was trying to tell him and he kept ignoring. They say it’s obvious. That theres no such thing as “platonic jealousy” like that. But he’s still in denial.
“I’m sure it was only a platonic thing.” He says, trying to convince more than his friends, looking over and checking on you every few seconds to make sure you’re still out. “We’ve never been romantic with anyone so shes probably just nervous about what would happen. I would be too.”
They don’t believe him, and he’s not sure if he does either. But he has to. Because if tonight meant anything else, then what does that mean for you two?
Yuta decided a long time ago that he would never confess, not unless he was 100% sure of your feelings. For fear of losing this privilege to know you, to get to have you around, even if just platonically. He couldn’t bear it. Things had to stay the same.
When you get back to his apartment, he brings you straight to his bed, ready to let you sleep there and find his own place on the couch.
“Do you want to shower first? I can lend you some clean clothes.” He suggests softly as you both sit in the quiet of the room. He brushes your hair gently behind your ear so that it’s out of your face.
“You’re just saying that cus you don’t want me to get all my sweat and stuff on your sheets.” You accuse, but he can tell it’s not hostile at all. You’re not mad anymore.
“I don’t care about that, I can just do laundry tomorrow. But I think it’d feel better for you that way.” He tells you honestly and you sigh. He knows you don’t want to.
“I just wanted to remind you that you can, you don’t have to. But you know what’s mine is yours here, right? If you need anything just go ahead.” He says sweetly and you hum, finally moving to lay down, resting your head on his pillow. It smells like Yuta. You nuzzle into it further.
“Okay.. I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight.” He tells you with a chuckle.
“Wait.” You say before he can get to the door. He turns to you.
“Mwhere are you goin?” You mumble sleepily. His heart melts.
“Just to the living room. I’ll sleep on the couch so don’t worry, okay?”
“Come here.” You tell him bluntly and he does. When he gets to the bed you pat the spot next to you. His face flushes.
“What? You want me to sleep here??”
“Mhm.”
“With you?”
“Just lay down, Yu.. I wanna sleep.” You groan, too exhausted to be explaining or convincing. You just want him next to you.
And then he’s laying next to you.
This shouldn’t be awkward, you guys have napped together before. But that was a long time ago, and things feel different now. He’s so unsure of where to put his hands or how to position himself until you decide for him. You reach out and pull yourself into him, arms wrapping around him and legs tangling. He naturally just curls around you all the same, feeling your breath on his chest as you easily lull into sleep like this. It’s a bit hard to think about anything but how soft and warm you are for a little while, hot and flustered from how intimate this feels and scared to mess it up. But, he does feel more comfortable after. How could he not? The way you sleep so peacefully in his arms sends him off to sleep not long after you.
The morning after that night is the start of his guilty conscience.
When he wakes up sporting a full hard-on, he’s incredibly glad you’re not in a position to have noticed it. He had the craziest dream about you, and waking up face to face to you afterwards could not make him feel anymore mortified and embarrassed. How could he? Have a wet dream about you when you’re sleeping RIGHT next to him.
And the thoughts he’s having about you right now as he watches you so innocently sleep, blissfully unaware to his thoughts.
It’s horrible.
It’s exciting. No, it’s perverted.
Even with all his self control in previous years, you can’t really control what you dream about, can you? Sure, he’s had dreams like these about you before. But he’s read on the internet that people have wet dreams about random people too, people they’ve never even considered like that! So he doesn’t count it.
But it’s when he’s sliding out of bed to take care of things in the bathroom, trying to relieve himself to anything but the thought of you. He just can’t think of anything else good enough. He wants to think about you so bad. The way you were all over him last night, so many opportunities where he could’ve told you how he feels. He could’ve told you want he wanted from you so badly instead of denying it.
When he was tipsy, body pressed against you and music pumping in his ears. His face tucked into your neck, breathing in your scent clearer than anything and feeling your hands stretched around his back. He even could’ve told you then, that he loved you. How badly he wanted you in that moment too, his desires bubbling up so bad that he could practically beg for you. And maybe you would’ve at least humored him, giggled at his drunken daze and been so gracious as to grant him more of you.
Or what would’ve happened if he had let you do what you wanted? In that bedroom, alone just the two of you, with you in his lap. Would you really have stopped after one kiss?
And then snippets from his dream start to cross his mind. You in the same dress last night that he tried so incredibly hard not to think about too much, how it hugged every curve of your body and made your breasts look so nice. And in that dream, the dirty things you said to him between kisses on his neck while you stroked his length.
“Does that feel good, Yu? You wanna cum for me?”
“Yes.. ffucyes..” He mumbles to himself as his pace gets faster. Somehow it ended up like this, not sure when he even started to touch himself, but far past the headspace to care. He feels his climax already, the thought of you making him so unbelievably excited.
In his mind you’re on top of him, bouncing on his cock in all your glory in that beautiful dress that you love. And he could admire anything else right now but all he wants to see is the look on your face. He wants to see how good he can make you feel, not holding back anything at all.
“Fuck, Yu… That feels so good.. I love you..” You’d whine for him and he can feel his pleasure spilling over.
“Y/n… godfuck.. I love you, I love you.” He chants to himself as quietly as he can manage as his hips start to jerk up and stutter. His climax hits and normally he’d be ready to catch his load in his hands, but it rips through him so urgently and suddenly that it manages to catch him offguard.
He stares at the scene in front of him, the mess he made. His breathing is shaky and uneven. His heartbeat doesn’t slow as he starts to realize what he just did. He just jerked off thinking about you, shamelessly, while you’re literally a room away. How could he? What would you think of him if you found out about this? You’d probably think he’s a huge pervert and never talk to him again, right?
You always understood him, but this is unforgivable.
The guilt eats him alive, even after he’s cleaned up and started making breakfast. Trying to distract himself with tasks and chores, he can’t even bring himself to go back to his room and face you as he keeps thinking about the awful thoughts his mind willingly conjured about you. There’s no excuse now. And even in his guilt, he can’t stop thinking about how good that felt. He’s never felt that good thinking or looking at anything else when pleasuring himself. This is bad. He could get addicted to this. He wants to do it again right now, actually. Is that horrible?
“Yu?” Your voice startles him so bad that he jumps, almost throwing the frying pan in his hold. He turns to see your still fogged-with-sleep self standing before him. You’re still in that dress.
“H-hey. You’re up! I’m… making breakfast. Are you hungry?” He says, nervous for some reason. Like you’d be able to tell immediately just by looking at him what he’s done, smell the pervertedness and deceit on him.
“Mm.. That sounds nice.” You just smile and then let out a small yawn. You’re so adorable. What has he done? “I’m gonna shower first, is that okay?”
Another wave of anxiety rushes through him as he starts to overthink whether or not he cleaned up enough in there. Which is dumb, because he literally scrubbed any evidence possible off the floor with diligence. But maybe you’d find something anyways.
“Oh.. um.. yeah, go ahead. You know I don’t mind.” He says after maybe a little too long of a pause.
He waits for you to come out again with breakfast laid out on the coffee table in front of him. He mindlessly scrolls on his phone to keep his thoughts busy with something, anything else.
When you step out again, you’re wearing one of his t-shirts he almost never wears and seemingly his boxers as well, though he can’t see them very well from how far the shirt falls. He has to act like he’s reading something very interesting on his phone to avoid looking at you, his face blushing. This should be just a regular morning for you two and yet why does it feel like like you just-
“Fuck, I needed that shower! I feel so much better” You tell him as you take a seat by his side.
He smiles, putting his phone down now.
“I’m glad.” He watches you sip down some of the water in front of you, eyes shamefully trained on your lips. “And.. how are you feeling?”
“I feel fine! Don’t worry. I think I probably puked up all the alcohol in my system last night. If anything I’m just hungry. And thirsty.” You tell him as you poke your fork into a piece of pancake on your plate, and then catching yourself.  “Oh. Sorry, that’s kinda gross to say right before we eat. Thank you for the food by the way.”
You look at him and smile so sweetly that it makes Yuta forget about all the thoughts plaguing him for a moment. He laughs at your words.
“You’re welcome. But you should eat as much as you can before the other two get out here and devour it all.”  He jokes and starts eating as well. You let out a small laugh and nod in agreement.
“You’re right, I forgot they live here.”You say and you’re only half kidding. “That’s why you made so much, huh? I got worried you were expecting me to finish this, but I didn’t know how to tell you.”
Yuta laughs and shakes his head, taking another forkful of eggs. After that the conversation kinda dies as the two of you just enjoy your delicious breakfast.
A few minutes of silence go by before he decides to speak up.
“So.. do you remember much about last night?” He asks you and you turn to him with a curious look. “I know that sometimes if you drink too much it can affect your memory.. so I was just wondering.”
He knows he’s probably blushing a bit now. There’s a real reason why he’s asking you, right?
“Oh. Well, yeah I’m pretty sure I remember most of it. Some of it is maybe a little foggy.” You tell him after thinking for a moment. When you look at him again, he’s staring at you. You laugh a little.
“If you’re wondering if I remember the almost-fight and all that, I definitely do. Though I kinda wish I didn’t.” You joke, but not really kidding. Deep down you are a little mortified about what you did. Moreso with Yuta than with that girl, but still even then you only caused that scene because of your jealousy over Yuta. Does he know you like him that way now? Did you give yourself away?
“Ah.. I see.” He says awkwardly and your guilt pangs in you.
“Yuta.. I’m really sorry about last night.” You say finally and he looks at you kinda surprised. “I mean I did a lot of embarrassing things that weren’t too bad, could just be written off as those funny things I did at my first party, yknow? But..”
You play with the food on your plate a little, not quite able to look at him.
“But I did something really not okay with you. I.. I was forcing myself on you and you were clearly uncomfortable, right? I don’t even know what I was thinking.. I would never..” You start to apologize, but kind of struggle with how to put it. How can you even explain yourself for something like that? Isn’t it obvious?
“Hey, it’s okay.” He says gently, putting your nerves to rest with just one phrase as he puts his warm hand on yours. You look over at him to see him smiling fondly. How can he forgive you so easily?
“It wasn’t like that. I know you weren’t in the right headspace. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t.. do something you’d regret, yknow?” He explains like youre sure he said to you similarly last night. You ended up being regretful anyways, but you suppose this is best case scenario. You cant imagine if you had kept forcing yourself on him then, probably ruining your relationship forever. You’re thankful that your best friend is as sweet and forgiving as he is.
“Thank you.. I still think it was wrong though. I’ll make it up to you.” You promise him and go back to eating.
You don’t bring up the kiss at all. Even though you remember exactly what he told you last night.
“If you wake up tomorrow, when you’re sober, and you still want that first kiss.. I’ll do it.”
You believe him. You know he would, and it scares you. It scares you because you know you might not be able to control yourself if you open that door. Anything could happen after. You’re scared.
Yuta doesn’t bring it up for the same reason. And he doesn’t ask you about your reasonings or motives for why you did what you did that night either. Like why seeing some other girl almost kiss him made you so angry that you offered to take his first instead. No, even though his mind yearned for answers, he was also too scared to look for them. Afraid of what he might find or what trap he might set off.
So, neither of you bring it up. You act like it was all meaningless. Just drunk nonsense with no actual motive behind it.
But even so, that night ends up changing your relationship forever.
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the-s1lly-corner · 2 months ago
Note
This one request may be a little out there but can I request various creepypastas walking the reader home after they notice someone trailing behind them? They don't know the reader that well, maybe they've just entered the friend stage?
Various crps walking the reader home
Ooooo love this idea sm, sm sm might YOINK this for other characters in a different post
Characters: nina, hoodie, masky, toby
Notes: reader is GN, you and the crp arent dating but you guys are friends/friendly
CWs: stalking(? Does it count if it's an isolated instance of being followed?), implied violence
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NINA THE KILLER
doesnt even wait to greet you when shes close by, she calls for you and says hi as she rushes up to you from... wherever she just was-
hooks her arm around yours, and keeps her hold on you firmly... perhaps out of concern... the risk that you might get snatched by someone else and taken?
though its not likely, given that shes twirling her knife around in the air in plain sight as she practically skips by your side- talking to you so casually as if there was nothing wrong
as soon as the person is gone shes asking if youre alright- do you need her to add someone on the chopping block? because she can probably track them down and-
fully understanding if you dont want her to do anything like that, but you can tell shes still... contemplating... insists she spends at least some time with you when you get home to make sure all is well- during the time shes there shes making sure youre alright as well as helping ease yourself after something like that
HOODIE
very tall, likely towers over whoever is making you feel threatened. unlike masky, he does look back at the other person... almost as if he is sizing them up
in the light you swear you catch a shine of something hidden away in his pocket- but the need to pull it out never arises as the person keeps their distance
its dead quiet between the two of you- as expected, and he does give you some breathing room... hes slightly behind you, almost like a barrier between you and the creep
immediately stomps out any attempts the person makes at getting closing the gap by blocking their way and glaring down at them until they either go the other way or pass ahead of the two of you... and even then hes going to continue moving to keep between you and them
will come inside if you offer him, he keeps an eye out long after the danger has passed
MASKY
you were already so caught up in making a plan for what to do, that you didn't even realize Masky taking his spot next to you. He nearly scared you just as much as the person behind you, at least.. until you realized it was just him
keeps close to you, and doesn't give the one following you a look.. to further push the point that the two of you are together he wraps an arm around you and tugs you closer
for someone who is usually so adverse to touch, and being interested in keeping his personal space- he was more than willing to toss all of that out of the window to bring you even an ounce of security
you eventually lose them, but thats not going to stop him from walking you the rest of the way home. he doesnt invite himself in, but you catch him stalking around the outside of your house- as if making sure there was no other unwanted visitors
TICCI TOBY
not as quiet as his fellow proxies, and in fact will spin around to make a conflict if the person isnt dropping it as you draw closer to your neighborhood
its... hard to say its the right choice, but making noise does add in the uncomfortable fact that it may draw attention- that in of itself isnt the best for toby given his record... you know, with arson and the like..
and if the person takes it as an opening to rush forward? toby goes no where without his weapons, and if the person didnt take that into account or didnt notice them then thats on them! anything that happens afterwards is just karma!
even if it doesnt escalate to that he talks with you, making it clear that the two of you are familiar with each other- he spares no volume as he catches up with you- will flash his hatchet and perhaps drop some recent work he was meant to do for his boss
gladly takes your invitation to stay, keeps you company and you both end up having a sleepover together
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