#i didn't want to derail any of the other posts going around

[inqorporeal]

In light of a Certain Writer being back on her bullshit (if she ever even stopped), I want to remind people that, while, yes, the Nazis went after early 20th century LGBTQ+ people because fascists cannot abide deviation from their established norms, the Institut für Sexuallwissenschaft was a major target because Magnus Hirschfeld was Jewish, and homosexuality and transsexualism were being framed as a Jewish plot against society.

We're currently seeing heightened levels of overt antisemitism on all levels of political engagement and even on the supposedly liberal end of the spectrum; at the same time there are rising levels of queerphobia* which are forcing LGBTQ+ people to consider their personal safety in their own homes. It's only a matter of time before someone decides to try combining these two to get more liberals to shift conservative.

Nobody is immune to propaganda. Call people out for their antihistorical bullshit claims, by all means, but bear in mind the full context, or we're going to find ourselves swiftly repeating one of the worst episodes of Western history.

"Never again" demands personal awareness.

(*I use 'queer' here in the sense of "anyone who flaunts social and gender norms" which includes people who are not LGBTQ+ in any sense but whose personal expression is still considered deviant by conservatives and fascists. Do not fucking tag "q-slur" here.)

[sonicboomseason3]

a brief recap of what has been going on with the sonic movieverse in the past several months:

paramount has come out in public support of israel

keanu reeves, a man who has publicly rubbed elbows with none other than benjamin netanyahu, reportedly gets cast as shadow for the upcoming third movie

james marsden, the guy who plays tom, got exposed as having written a letter of support for a convicted pedophile

there's fucking??? zionist propaganda in the knuckles series???

kind of connected to the last point but adam pally, the guy who plays wade, is evidently pro-israel too

this is a complete and utter joke.

EDIT AS OF 4/30/24: if people see this version of the post, i'd really appreciate it if you reblog it instead of the other versions, as it's the most updated one with all the information that i want included. thank you :]

you know, it's been a few days since i've made this post, and some of you (not most) are staying determined in defending/justifying/giving the benefit of the doubt to keanu for that photo with netanyahu, whether it's because "it was a decade ago," "him being civil to someone he ran into at a party one time doesn't mean anything," "he's probably just silent because his pr managers won't allow him to speak up," etc. i've made my thoughts on the matter quite clear by directly responding to these people, but at this point, i'm tired of both seeing them in my notes and repeating myself, so take this as my final word on the issue.

i can't help it if you don't think the photo with netanyahu is damning, and i'm done engaging with everyone going out of their way to tell me that. i obviously disagree, especially after finding out that 1. the host of the party, arnon milchan, is a former israeli spy who has a history of developing israel's nuclear program and promoting apartheid in south africa (information that had broken out a few months prior to the party and thus would've been fresh news around the time keanu chose to attend) and 2. keanu has been caught hanging around at least two other weirdos, but if you don't find any of that to be cause for reasonable concern, then there really is nothing else i can say afaik.

with all that said, i'm beginning to realize how strange it is that these people's first instinct when seeing this post is to start debating about keanu's political stances without ever acknowledging any of the other bullet points. you guys realize that this isn't just about him, right? i know tumblr reading comprehension is known for being piss-poor, but like… you realize that i was trying to make a point of how there are MULTIPLE terrible things that have broken out about the people and company involved in the sonic movies, right? and yet, a lot of the people leaping to speak on keanu's behalf in my notes are completely ignoring the parts where i bring up paramount, pally, etc. all in favor of zeroing in on the singular point about keanu and making bad faith assumptions about me for holding him accountable. really makes one wonder where your priorities lie if, in a post that talks about so many other things, me accusing an a-list celebrity with, according to google, a net worth of almost $400 million is where you draw the line and apparently the only thing worth your acknowledgment.

ultimately, what i'm trying to say is that the intention of this post was just to gather up everything that i had been hearing for the past several months and put it all together in one place. there were a bunch of people who didn't know about at least one of the bullet points before seeing this post, and i'm glad that i could help inform them, that was what i was hoping to do! but as for the keanu thing, i've said pretty much all i can say for now, and i don't want to derail the original post even more than i may have already. unless something new comes up, i'm done talking about him.

[neonovember]

I have a sort of angsty hurt to comfort idea for Carmy 😈 Okay but Claire coming back into his life and obviously you’re both dating, but maybe sort of feeling a little bit left out and feeling guilty for feeling a little insecure because you know Carmen’s loyal and Claire seems like a lovely person. Not saying anything because you obviously want him to be happy and you know there’s a part of you that’s being irrational. But THEN, maybe for whatever you also personally know Luca! Perhaps from something work related or had mutual friends and then maybe getting back into contact with him through Marcus and really hitting it off with him and having a respectable normal healthy friendship with him, but Carmy’s on the side going “What the cinnamon toast FUCK is this”. And it culminates in an argument which ultimately leads the both of you to opening up and discussing boundaries and airing out insecurities, and just being super vulnerable and communicating with one another

Love and War (I)

warnings; claire, arguing, threats of violence, anxiety, my writing

i had like 4 different versions of how this story was supposed to go, hope you enjoy the one i finally let see the sun

a/n: yeah...so shit hit the fan and kind of derailed my life for 6 months. I hope you will forgive me, i feel like an absentee father. (part two will be posting right after i swear!)

divider by @firefly-graphics

You aren't jealous.

You have never experienced the slimy green devil in any of your past relationships, so you shouldn't feel it now.

Your mind isn't fond of what it should feel however, and instead, you feel a burning ache begin to burst through your chest as you watch Carmen nod excitedly at Claire in the Beef’s front dining space. It disgusts you, how this feeling wraps around your heart like sludge. You've been trying to focus on prepping for the new menu, gathering different ensembles of compotes and sauces, but your eyes always finds it’s way back to them.

And her.

Claire had burst into Carmen’s life seemingly out of nowhere, and it took one exchange between you both to know it was different. Claire had something you didn't with Carmen, a past, and the discomforting feeling of being on the outside looking in was all that blared in your mind the past few weeks since her appearance.

It wasn’t like Claire was rude, no that would have made this feeling easier to bear. She was nice, for god sake. The only person in Chicago who it seemed had not yet gotten all their goodness sucked out, and she had to have been Carmen's old friend. And a friend was all she was, so why did you- why are you jealous?

She knows him better than you do.

You shake the thought out of your mind so furiously the container in your hand spills onto the cutting board. You weren't going to go there, not when Carmen hadn't done anything wrong.

 You wanted him to have friends, to broaden his circle from beyond just the Beef and Sugar, who you made sure to point out didn't exactly count. So you should be happy, ecstatic even, that he was able to reconnect with someone that had known him for so long.

But she had known him for so long. 

And you know you're being irrational and hypocritical and you know you can’t own someone else, but maybe there was a part of you that liked that you had him all to yourself.

Carmen was different. To your other relationships, your other friendships, everything. You and Carmen danced around your feelings for so long that when it exploded into heated kisses and confessions of love one night after a dazzling dinner service, it had already felt like you had been with him for years.

And Carmen was devoted to you, he sang it into your skin every chance he got. It was just that those chances had begun to dwindle day after day the more Claire came around, until you had begun to detest the sound of her name leaving his mouth.

Steeping your fingers in cold water, you wipe them hastily no your aprosn before making your way over to them both. Fixing your face from quivering lips into a tight smile.

You wipe your messy hands in your apron, steeping your fingers before making your way over to them both. Fixing your face, you pull your quivering lips into a tight smile.

“Hey, Claire. How are you doing?” 

“Oh hey! Good good, Carmen was just telling me about this cool hole in the wall down 85th.”

“Ruth’s Bar?”

“Yes! That’s the one. They really do saffron popcorn there?” Claire replies, eyes bulging.

“Yep, mix it in with a little alcohol and then pour it into the butter. Entertainment is almost too good that you forgot about how amazing it smells though”

“We should go out some time!”

“Definitely. Carmen, were you alright with Thai tonight?”

“Oh” Carmen replies, scratching the back of his head

He forgot.

“Yeah, sorry hun I promised to take Claire to-”

“This new fusion place! I saw it online and Carmen offered to take me.

You voice pitter and curls as you gulp down the innate urge to reply with a deadpan ‘What?”.

“Oh. Ah- okay. What’s the place?” You reply, your voice on the verge of shaky as you blink through Claire, watching to see if there was any semblance of guilt in Carmen.

There wasn't, he was taking her out on a night reserved for you to. As if they hadn't spent nearly everyday together, as if Claire hadn’t imprinted her ass on the bar chair’s sharing pieces of things you never could with him.

“It’s called Route Creale?” Claire replies, excitedly, obviously to the sour expression on your face as she butchers the name of the restaurant.

“La Route Créole” You correct, almost unconsciously. 

Practiced from the amount of times you had excitedly to Carmen about the Trinidan-French fusion place, looking through the menu together, huddled over your cracked phone screen in the early morning in your bed. Listing of dishes and dishes that made you squeal in delight. 

You had told Carmen how bad you wanted to go, how bad you wanted both of you to try it together, and instead, instead he takes her. 

He takes her.

“Easy, not everyone has spent months as the head Poissonnier in Port Of Spain” Carmen jokes, head tilting as you stammer, eyes focused on the floor.

“What the hell is a Poissonnier” Claire replies giggling

And as Carmen clarified to her, gripping her arm as he rambles on the importance of the distribution of fucking cooking stations your mind kind of skips.

It falls over itself like a misshapen piece of the sidewalk. Your eyebrows are screwed and you're looking at Carmen looking at Claire. For a second you are confused, wholeheartedly and entirely confused to the very marrow of your being. Who was this person in front of you? It couldn’t have been your Carmen.

Your Carmen who wrote you letters left on food packages and stuffed in your locker. Your Carmen who would follow you around like a lost puppy, enthralled by your every move. Your Carmen who sung you to sleep in horrible drunken renditions of “Livin on a prayer”.

Jesus he knew every part of you, every inch of yourself like a road map, forks and branched  roots across your skin. You hug your mid section tightly, fingers digging through the cotton of your button chef shirt.

No, no. Someone must have come in and taken his face, his clothes, his mouth.

But he smells like him, the same deep scent of cocoa and burnt cigarettes. You could press your lips to his, but you don’t know if he’d like that anymore. 

You know when someone is slipping away, you’re not one to guard your food like a stray dog. And no matter how hard you want to sink your teeth into him and not let go, you don’t have a choice.

The squealed sound of Claire rips you from your reverie, and your eyes shoot up to catch her grip Carmen's shoulder, her head tilted back and eyes squirmed shut in laughter. The ripple of jealous rage that bursts through every limb in your body causes you to subtly turn on your heel, rushing out of the suffocating stench of betrayal. 

Fingers digging to unlace your apron that feels as if like a vice around your chest, unheard to the inquisitive shouts of Richie and Syd, until you hear the slam of the backdoor behind you.

Your leg jitters as you walk around in circles, grinding your jaw as visions of Claire and Carmen flash in your mind. Fisting the washcloth in your hand till your knuckles turn white, you stuff your face into it, masking the scream of festered anger that rips from your throat. 

You’re pathetic, you don't get to feel jealous. Carmen would never even think of it, of betraying you. But he also wouldn't have taken the very restaurant you had been gawking at for the past month and taken someone else to it. Right in your face.

You don’t know if he even noticed your abrupt disappearance, your eyes shift to the door, waiting, hoping. Ears perked up at any sound of rushing footsteps to come find you. 

Angry tears gather at the waterline when all you hear is the rumbling traffic behind you and the flutter of shrikes above.

You’re not jealous, you’re fuming

You hate it, no, you hate him. You seethe as you're forced to sit in it pushing the adoration and love you have for him to make room for it in your mind. It takes over, overcrowding your brain till you can't hear anything else, where even the buzzing of your phone is unregistered till your thigh begins to itch.

Oh god you told him about those times before, you told him. And he had wiped your tears and kissed your eyelids, damning your past boyfriend who had left you forsaken.

Wiping a hand across your face, you reach down to grasp the metallic slick edges. And the image of Luca flashing across the screen stumps you frozen till it rings out. You hadn't seen him since Denmark, in fact it had been years.

The ping of a text shakes you from the memories of spending months on boats and pastry kitchens in Copenhagen, the gray bubbles appearing on your screen.

“Gonna be in Chicago for a bit, wanna test out if your Mille-Feuille is still up to standard?”

You want to say that you answered Lucas' text in that brief moment out of genuine curiosity. That you would have wanted to see him whether Clair had uprooted your life with Carmen either way.

But you’d be lying to yourself.

The slight drizzle drips down your screen phone, muddying and blurring the Lucas texts till you have to wipe your shirt across it. You hesitate though, you think the blurred messages between you both absolves you of guilt. That it was as if you were lookin through pane fogged glass. But you slide your hand across the screen and it brightens to your eyes, defying every word between you both. You want to see Luca, Carmen had no hesitation when it came to Claire, oh no, he wouldn't think twice before spending the day with her. 

Days like today, where you would usually be posted up in Carmens old beaten leather couch, the cushions weaning under your weight as you ate rice steeped in coconut milk and kung pao on plates.

It’s tradition, or it once was. So much of what you held close to your heart had been left to ruins, maimed and disfigured. Pulled from under you when you had thought it sacred, you should have expected this, it was too good. You’ve stewed in your deprecation look enough till it turned bitter, outpouring harsh streaks of anger from your heart instead.

You helped Sydney finish up the last of the next evening's desserts, waving her off with a smile when she had asked about your sudden departure earlier. She ignored the way your hands shook, and you reached for your things and rushed home before she could prod further.

You felt dirty.

Like Carmen was replacing you slowly, out from under you. Did he think you were too stupid to realise? You don’t want to imagine the things shared between them, and yet you do. Scrubbing your skin raw in the shower does little to scratch the memory of them out of your mind.

You’re resting on the edge of your bed, clutching your towel as you look towards your closet. Phone in hand at Lucas' text inviting you to dinner at his place, you turn Carmen’s picture on the dresser face down before reaching into your closet, and pulling out a dress you had forgotten existed.

When you slide the silk fabric onto your body, it feels anew. Like you were a different skin. It flutters at the edges of your calf, long and rich in colour in elegance.

Your hair is left in its natural state, running some products through with your fingers till the sticky crème is gone from between your knuckles. Carmen always loved your hair this way.

So did Luca.

Your time spent in Copenhagen didn't necessarily involve Luca, not at the start anyways. You were reviewing foods around Denmark, a long awaited food tour you had begun saving for before culinary school, and had made a pit stop at a weathered bakery. 

It wasn't on your repertoire for your trip, in fact you had thought nothing of it, a transitional spot to grab an espresso and maybe a danish.  It had seen better days. The wooden doors stained and creaking as you passed through, inside though, inside was as if you had entered the warmth of someone's heart and soul. Delicate paintings and familial photographs hang on the walls, low lamp lighting, a built-in fireplace that defrosts your fingers wedged in your coat pocket.

The most strange and endearing thing, however, was the bar attached on the same counter as the paned glass display of baked goods. In all your time in food, you had never seen a bakery that doubled as a..brewery? Distilled barrels hitched atop the caramel coloured walls, jugs and glasses perched atop the counter. You weren't necessarily a drinker per se, but the thought of filling your stomach with liquid heat pushed you to shut the door behind you and set your things on the bar counter.

“Now what makes someone as sunny as you walk into the most haggard bakery in all of Copenhagen?” A Brooklyn lilt voice calls from the small entryway into the back kitchen, a tall blonde man wipes his hand on a dishcloth, the tired features of cooking for hours you know to well etched on his face.

You stand right in surprise, you half heartedly expect the embodiment of Hagrid to walk out, and instead New York came bustling through. 

“You sure you aren't lost sweetheart? Lookin’ for Noma?”

“I’m told I can get a pint of something hard and dry with my croissant” You murmur, cockling your head to the side “Or does this fine establishment not know how to laminate dough?”

From that moment on, you had spent almost every day in Denmark being guided to the “actually” good food spot in the city. You wanted to deny it, holding your list of restaurants and bakeries you had died to try since your trip to your chest like a rare jewel.

But God did those alleyway Frikadeller’s taste like religion. You wanted to fall to your knees and pledge your devotion.

Still, after you had draine the last of your savings on cider and meatballs your craft was calling to you from the States. Luca had told you things you had not even read in the mountain of textbooks and ‘Pastry 2’ tutorials you were assigned as a student, marveling at the intricacy of pastry and the world of dough.

He had mentioned a Chef he admired, one he wanted you to meet yourself. You wondered all those months who could have bested Luca. 

And then you met Carmen.

Time and distance had feathered the brief but all consuming intimacy you and Luca shared. It wasn't like you had shared a bed together, no, it was far more deeper than that. You both shared the unraveling layers of your joint obsession;

Food.

It tethered you to each other so finely that even now, after years of no contact, you knew you would fall back into the same rhythmic dance you once had those years before.

It shakes the nerves from your body when you finally rack your knuckles against Luca’s restaurant door.

“Comin, comin, don’t break down the door” Luca’s silky voice laments from deep within the restaurant, before the iron door opens and you’re met with golden streaked hair and a wine stained apron.

“Why is it that every time I see you, you've got something stained on your face” You smile

“It’s the Lucas charm, what can I say” or “Oh please, you eat whatever caused those stains.”

“You say this now, but you’ll be praying to these stains when you taste you’re menu tonight” Lucas smirks

You chuckle shaking your head, before Lucas pulls you into a hug

“4 years and you still smell the same”

“You know I'm a women of routine, like the same bottle of perfume and my eggs-”

“Over easy, yeah yeah.”

“You know me so well!”

“No I just can’t get the smell of sunflowers from out my nose even years later”

“I paid a pretty penny for it, it should be fucking ever lasting”

Lucas shakes his head in a smile, and flashes of stomach pained laughter in pebbled alleyways and chef’s kitchens lights up your mind.

“What are you doing over here Luca?”

“A friend who works in restaurant business asked me to help get one of his locations up and runnin’ in Chicago” Luca replies

You follow him through drywall and scaffolding poles, catching the beginnings of the seating area as you observe the paint swatches on walls . The menu does always comes first.

“And this is you up and running? Conducting mini-master classes for old friends” You joke

“Mhm, don’t think we can classify ourselves as old friends just yet. It was just yesterday the last I saw you.” Luca replies in ponder

“Right, that must be all the gas fumes from looming over sauce pans for eons going to your brain. You do know nobody forced you to make that 36 hour long creme brulee right?” You tease

Lucas fights a giggle as he remembers the dish he had slaved over two nights, “And that sauce earned me a damn near Michelin Star.” 

“Yeah, you probably should've been awarded a Nobel Prize for that” You admit, leaning against the stainless steel table counter of the central kitchen.

“Heard you started working with Carmen, he's good isn't he?”

The brick that had begun to dislodge from your throat slips back in, gulping down an uneasy breath as you give him a tight smile.

“It’s wonderful, he's really something” You murmur, thanking the gods that Lucas was too busy rummaging around the fridge to notice your features melting into malice.

“I wanted to keep this a secret, but who am I kidding. Come, I wanna show you something”

Lucas comes over, rolling your eyes as he makes you take off your coat. Hes eyes skim down your figure fast enough for you not to notice, but you feel him linger gently grasping the cotton of you fleece before hooking it onto a door handle.

To your surprise he pulls out a crisp chef apron, nodding with wide eyes as you stare at him baffled.

“Do you think my text was a joke? C’mon I know you, you would've been sitting there working yourself up not being able to get your hands dirty”

You chuckle sheepishly as you agree, cooking was your life. Even if you had gotten out of a 24 hour day you’d still sore your bones over a good meal. Especially with Luca.

You walk over to him, noting the papers scattered on the table counter and a laptop opened, the light streaming in. It’s opened to a leasing site, a run down appliance store who’s store wide sale had begun peeling off the windows.

“What's this?” You murmur, confusion in your voice as your eyes jump over the listing description quickly

“This is a home furniture store”

"Yes I gathered that from the block letters Luca, what does it mean?” You look over Luca whos grinning widely at you

“You know this used to be an old mill factory? The ones they'd make 7 year old work 20 hour shifts on?” Luca continues

“Have you turned into an anthropologist? Is this what this is? You takin’ a career change this late in the game old man?” You tease.

Luca doesn't laugh, he doesn't even roll his eyes, he just continues grinning ear to ear. You’re suddenly afraid he’s body has been tossed in a dumpster in Frederiksberg and this is his body double.

“It was practically a bakery, sweets. Who better than me to bring it back to its roots?” Luca replies finally as you were considering the best option to escape through the fire exit

You’re stumped before it dawns on you, Luca is gonna open his own bakery? Restaurant? You weren't clear as to what it was going to be exactly but you knew by the look of excitement on his face that it was his.

“You and goddamn rundown buildings” You shake your head, as Luca looks at you with a stupid smile, you can't help but let out a laugh.

“Tis only right I tell the person who saw me sweating in that furnace heated bakery in Denmark daring. It’s fate, and you know it” Luca replies

You chuckle, before bursting in excited laughter, oh you were so happy. You were, it had been his dream, to bring back some of heart that had been left in that flour room when he had come back to the States

You grab his hands, holding them tightly, reaching for his face and jaw and bringing him to your chest with adoration.

“Oh Luca, really? You did it?” You grin and he gazes down at you in sheepish resignation.

“Already put down the payment. Drained half my bank account so I’m going to have to DIY the architecture, and just engineer structure of the place but I dont care.” He chuckles

“Who cares about structural support when they taste that 36 hour creme bulee huh?” You chime, teasing.

You let go of his face but he grabs your wrist tightly,

“I want you to join me.”

You heart stills for a second, and you don't know if its the rush of nostalgia or the anger over Carmen that fights over your tongue to say

“Yes”

“I know you've got a good thing going with Carmen, and it won't interfere with that-”

Luca stammers before stopping abruptly, raising his eyebrows in confusion at your reply. He cocks his head to the side

“It’s fine, I can leave the Beef and help open it up with you”

“Woah woah wait a second, I didn't say leave Carmen-”

“That DIY job isn't going to be a one man job, besides I’m not that valuable there really, just help around here and there. Carmen could do without me to be honest, one less person to pay ya know? It's fine really” It your turn to ramble incessantly, slipping the resentment against Carmen and Calire through your jumbled reply

“Yeah? Is that why you're balling your fists?”

You look to Luca, whose eyes zero in on your shaking hands. You put them behind you quickly, self conscious as you bite your lip.

“You and I both know when you’re runnin’ from something. You really think you can hide things from me of all people?

“You don't want me working for you Luca? I just said I’d leave what I'm doing to do this with you”

“And I want you too, but I also know it's been a dream to work with someone as talented as Carmen”

“Yeah real fucking talented” 

Luca looks at you, squinting his eyes

“I’ve talked to him you know” He murmurs softly, eyes still strained on you

“What?” You scoff, shaking your head

“And the way he gushes about you tells me enough. He damn near sounded like he was going to jump through the phone and ring my neck after I had told him I knew you before. The way he says your name? Tell me you're not just an employee, and the menu I’m hearing all around the city? Lavender and hazelnut? Lime and pistachios? That's all you. Even if you don't know it, you've imprinted yourself into that place and every dish Chicago is raving about” Luca replies, and his voice is low and his eyes are wide as he looks at you can’t not ignore him.

“I know you don't give up easily, and I’m not trying to play mediator, but just- think on it okay? You're going to be a part of this, that is certain. But you're a part of a lot okay? Being the head sous chef is nothing to what they’d make us do back in New York and you know it.”

You're about to bite back a reply before Luca raises his eyebrows, as if he's already as an onslaught of resorts to everything you have to say. You resign yourself to the fact; Luca knows you damn near better than yourself.

“Okay, I’ll think on it. Having you suffer a little without me is a nice image anyways” You reply, rolling your eyes as you tighten your apron. 

Luca chuckles as he shakes his head, motioning you to help start making your dinner.

The sounds of sizzling pans and braised meat left your stomach full and your heart heavy hours later. The heated argument you had with Luca seemed hours ago when you both had let the food bring you back into synchronization. 

You both sat criss cross on the unfurnished dining room floor, a plastic tarp underneath you both as you gorged yourself on duck, potatoes and cheap wine. You regret ever hesitating meeting with Luca, and you suppose you should thank Carmen for that.

Luca knows it's weighing heavy on your mind as he eyes you across the kitchen, wrapping up some leftovers for you. You shake your head as you gaze at him, giving him a reassuring smile that you know he doesn't believe. 

“If it all goes wrong you know you can come to me, anytime anywhere” Luca whispers into your ear as you fall into a tight embrace.

“Getting pretty tired of running my whole life Luca, god I just want to rest.”

“Then let yourself”

The uber comes and you kiss Luca goodbye as he bundles you into the backseat, the shower earlier has now filtered into a slight drizzle and you watch the slow rain drops glide down the window languidly. 

You didn’t want Carmen to be home when you arrived, but the thought of him being out with her this late had you gritting your teeth. You didn't know what you wanted.

taglist

@hansfics @kpopgirlbtssvt @parmforcarm @nolita-fairytale

[ozdicaff]

INTRODUCING: CHILDRENS SHOW AU!

WAY too excited to share these guys !!!! im super proud of these designs <3

CTS!Y/n and information about the AU under the cut!

In this AU, FazCo is a company running a TV channel network called FazBS, where each animatronic has their own show!

Sun's show airs at mornings and is all about getting energized and hyped up for the day, its similar to LazyTown with it's cartoon-esc violence and slapstick humor, with scenarios that make little sense, but are entertaining to watch anyway! only very simple language is used to make everything understandable for younger kids, with cameos of the other animatronics! his show was extremely popular, just above Roxy's and below Monty's in popularity.

Moon's show airs around bedtime and is focused on getting kids to go to sleep, with a soothing music box soundtrack, Moon's trance-inducing voice, and more advanced dialogue that makes kids zone out, its known for how fast it puts kids to sleep, even the especially rambunctious ones fall asleep out of boredom. While his show wasn't as talked about nor popular as sun's, it was highly rated among parents.

[descriptions for the glamrocks' shows will be added later when i draw refs for them too! :D]

Well, that was before the entire channel went downhill after FazCo fired all of its human workers.

Yeah, despite the channel's success and being extremely profitable, this was the FazCo's end-game from the start. Being able to AI-generate children's content without having to pay a single human, FazCo thought that their animatronics have already learnt enough from being show hosts for more than 10 years now, but they thought wrong. The gradual decline in quality was felt by the parents, and after Bonnie's show was suddenly cancelled- even the kids noticed how bad things were getting.

[psst, i'll go into detail about how each show was effected by this change in another post!]

Parents called in, demanding the shows they grew up with to be good again, and it wasn't just nostalgia speaking.

So, in an uncharacteristic turn of events, FazCo responded! They said that Freddy's, Monty's, Roxy's and Chica's shows were going to have human staff again!

...what they neglected to mention, was that they were pulling funding from Foxy's show, and cutting Sun's and Moon's budget in half to make up for this change.

Sun now has to re-use and repurpose old props to make up for his inability to get new ones, buying with his now super limited budget cheap D.I.Y kits to make crafts with- not to mention, without having any human staff around, he had to play every sound effect in real time- because the new S.T.A.F.F bots FazCo got have ZERO idea what comedic timing is. Needless to say he was under a lot of pressure, his show was pretty well liked by both kids and parents, and he didn't want to disappoint them. He had to change a lot with the absence of human actors and no narrator to have a solid dynamic with, calling on his pal Chica often jus to have another person on the show.

Moon's show however, was doomed from this change. Y'see, his show featured a narrator, posing as a curious soul and asking Moon thoughtful questions he can answer in a way kids can digest, Mister Rogers' Neighborhood style, and with no off-screen voice he can respond to, Moon's show felt incredibly eerie, as his true thoughts were left free with no guidance from his narrator buddy. He started acting stranger and stranger, going on derailed existential tangents accidentally, making a few jabs at FazCo here and there from frustration. The kids didn't understand any of it, but the parents found it off-putting, and complained.

Eventually, Moon's show was put on a permanent hiatus, after a particularly bad episode where 'moon truly let his rising anger at FazCo loose', as an article described it. No recording was archived of this episode, and any attempts to post it is quickly struck down by FazCo.

They've re-run old episodes of his show for about 6 months now, with no sign of moon coming back.

This, however, is when Y/N comes in! after half a year of dwindling ratings of sun's show, and decreasing profits in merch sales, they caved in and hired a single narrator! after not being able to retrieve their old narrator, due to "a small disagreement."- they brought you, surely, they don't expect you to single handedly bring back sun's show from ruin!? ...well, did they?

who fuckin knows you'll find out in my [soon to be written] fic lol

[inmyloveworld]

i'll look after you (bradley "rooster" bradshaw x reader)

word count: ~1.3k

synposis: "don't think, just do," was a challenging mentality to live by. but bradley quickly finds there is a balance to be had between thinking and doing.

warnings: allusions to anxiety, work abuse, overthinking

a/n: another hurt/comfort, who's surprised? this has been sitting in my drafts with an unfinished smut ending for a month but i’m electing to post without it as i’m not confident in my ~other~ writing abilities yet.. enjoy!

It was rare that the Navy ever let its aviators off early for the day; even more so for the elite members of Top Gun. Yet, with the clock barely stroking past a sunny four, Bradley was reclined on the sofa with a beer in hand. The house was spotless thanks to a shared cleaning spree the day prior. Nothing could have made for a more perfect turn of events.

But Bradley was pondering on the few texts he'd received that day. They were void of any of the color and character he was used to. None of the words exaggerated their spelling, and periods punctuated every short sentence. Everyone had once remarked him as a chronic overthinker both in the air and on the ground. It was easy to dismiss the gnawing he felt in his gut as the remnants of that mentality.

So, he cracked a Heineken and let himself indulge in uncommon solitude. The flat screen played his favorite drama to placate his mind. A subtle hunger led to perusing online menus for takeout ideas. Every little bit of stimulation was a welcome distraction from his pompous presumptions.

And then he heard it: the abrupt slam of a car door. Fumbling footsteps made their way to the front stoop followed by a clamoring of keys against the painted wood. Bradley grinned as he awaited the arrival, even through the slight tug of worry in his chest.

He watched as you stumbled inside without care. Shaking hands hung up tightly gripped keys and those same fumbling feet kicked off their shoes in frustration. Your shoulders rose and fell sharply with every short breath.

Was I overthinking?

Bradley had yet to see your face, had yet to meet those eyes always bright with excitement. Your face remained tucked toward the wall with each passing second. Swallowing his hesitation, Bradley spoke over the TV. "Baby?"

Your body reacted in shock, jolting up as your head whipped around.

I wasn't.

Hot tears were rolling down your cheeks. Said cheeks were splotchy, proof that these tears were far from the first you'd shed that day. The bright eyes he adored were puffy and red. Their brightness now was not out of joy but sorrowful watering.

Bradley's heart clenched tightly. "Oh, angel," he cooed, hurrying to displace his Heineken to a coaster and mute the TV. You had little time and no energy left to fight his comfort. As your boyfriend stood before you with open arms, you crashed into them.

He wasted no time in embracing you. Sobs broke past your wobbling lips and muffled against his shoulder. "I've got you, babe," Bradley soothed. "I've got you, it's okay. Just let it out."

All you had ever wanted was for someone to support you whenever life put you through the wringer. Bradley felt it a great privilege to be that support, knowing you'd do nothing short of the same for him. He almost cursed himself for letting his insecurities derail his intuition for you, but dismissed the old habit of self-deprecation. Nothing mattered more in this moment than helping you get back on your feet.

"I- I didn't know, you'd be ho-home," you blubbered. The comment irked something in him. How long had you been coming home in a similar state, putting yourself together just in time for him to get home? Were there more despondent texts or other warning signals he hadn't picked up on?

Each hypothesis built a greater desire to look after you, and to follow up on any twinge of doubt he felt. He needed not only to think but to take action on what he thought. "Shh, none of that, baby. None of that. You can always let go around me, okay? 'Can always tell me what's bugging you."

The words lifted heaviness off of you little by little. You cried more at the safety you felt in his words. Bradley guided you, leaden-legged, to the couch. He sat first before gently tugging you atop his lap.

Warm palms rubbed against your cheeks to dry them. Warmer brown eyes sunk into yours, unconditional love seeping through every glint of gold. "Do you wanna talk about it now, or later?" Though not wanting to let your feelings fester, Bradley didn't desire to press you for answers.

He watched as you took in a steady breath and nodded slowly. "Work's just.. just been really frustrating." You sniffled before continuing with anecdotes of being overworked and underappreciated.

Bradley continued to rub softly at your skin as you spoke. His lips pressed assuring kisses to your temples at times you got too worked up to continue. He gave every ounce of care and attention he could to your stories as you vented them out.

You slumped forward in his hold as you finished with a heaving sigh. Another soft kiss was pressed to the crown of your head. "Thank you for telling me, baby." His hands took up rubbing up and down your arms to help ease any remaining tension.

Bradley wasn't sure what he could say or do to make any of this better for you, to help resolve your problems in one fell swoop so that you never had to feel this way again. At the same time, he wasn't sure that a fix-it attitude was what you wanted or needed.

Don't think, just do.

"I want you to know that you're amazing. You work your ass off in everything you do without any promise of reward, and that's really admirable." You lifted your head slightly to see him, to see the sincerity dripping from his praises. "But you deserve recognition for it. It's not fair that you're continually overlooked for fuckheads who don't do a fraction of the shit you do. And it's not fair that you're made to feel so much less than you're worth. I'd kick all their asses if I could." His empty threat broke a small giggle from your lips as grateful tears replaced those of frustration.

Bradley returned your smile with one of his own before resuming a serious tone. "You don't ever have to put on a show for me, okay? I want you to know you're safe to come to me with anything, even the littlest complaints that you write off as whining. Do you ever think I'm whining about Jake getting on my nerves? Or Maverick getting too tough with me in the air?"

"Sometimes."

"Okay, that wasn't the best example." You laughed again, louder this time, and Bradley felt his chest swell with pride. He leaned forward to catch your lips against his, softly, allowing you to take the reins. The kiss stayed soft and sweet as you melted against him. Soft breaths filled the space between you as you parted, resting foreheads against one another. "I'll always look after you, angel. Don't forget that." You nodded in agreement before kissing him once more.

"Thank you."

🏷️: @avengersfan25

[yayakoishii]

Hello love! I saw your post asking for Sanji requests and as a die hard lover of both the anime and live action Sanji, I'll happily provide.

The crew ends up docking at a random island to rest and stay a bit on solid ground. When looking for a place to stay/eat they come across the readers restraunt. Just as they're about to walk in a customer gets thrown out the front door with the reader angrily yelling about manners and how to treat people respectfully.

The readers a cook, a little short tempered, loud, and unapologetically themselves and Sanji instantly falls in love.

Alright alright I'm done now ~ 🍄🐛💫

Respect | Sanji x Reader

Fandom: One Piece

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji × Reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Genre: Fluff??

A/n: Hey there anon!! I'm super late, but I hope you're still around to see this <3 tbh, this isn't my best work and I feel like it got a little ooc and derailed a bit towards the end but I hope you enjoy it! for all my short temper, I have no idea how to write an angry little gremlin lol.

To everyone else, thank you for the 100 followers and all the likes and comments!! This is insane tbh, I wasn't expecting anything on any of my works 😭 Y'all are too kind ❤️

also available on ao3!

The island they had docked on wasn't all that big, but the people there were lively. There weren't many hotels they could find since the town wasn't all that big, and any that they found were already filled to the brim. Finally after walking around for a while, they found a small tavern quite a ways from the shore. It seemed to be a little lively because there were sounds coming from the inside but it seemed to not be so full that they couldn't grab a table.

As they neared the door of the establishment, it suddenly banged open and two men fell through, looking a little roughed up and angry. The crew lingered at a distance, wondering what was going on when you came out, your chef's hat perfectly atop your head, with your hands on your hips.

"I better not see you around here ever again!" You snapped at the two, who flinched ever so slightly. "If you lack manners, that's YOUR problem. You can't take it out on my girls and expect me to treat you like the valued customers you are not."

The two sat up and glared at you, ready to retort but you raised the pan in your hand, waving it in front of their faces.

"Scram, unless you want me to burn your face," you finished calmly. That was enough. The two immediately scrambled up and ran into the distance. You huffed and blew away the lock of hair that had slipped out of your hat. You were about to turn around and go back in when you noticed the group standing there. "What?"

"Oh, um, we were looking for a place to eat?" Chopper felt the need to answer because you were staring at him. (You were a little curious and didn't mean to stare but that was hard when the group was full of… unique characters.)

"Well, a table just got empty so help yourself in," you grumbled, jerking your thumb to beckon them inside. The crew silently followed you in, to find that your tavern was mostly full too but the people were more calm and the ruckus of the other hotels was missing. "Oh yeah. Before you settle in, you should know the one rule of my establishment."

You narrowed your eyes at them. "You treat any of my girls with anything less than respect and you'll be thrown out like those two. Capisce?"

The crew just nodded, too hungry to actually bother with anything else but Sanji couldn't help but find you absolutely charming. It was common to find people who bent and let their customers do whatever for the sake of business, but you were protective of your employees and you didn't care about being a fake sort of nice. He watched you stalk back to where the food was being cooked, responding nicely to the customers asking if all was good. You were nice where it mattered, and unapologetically yourself if your values were threatened. It was all too easy to find you like a breath of fresh air.

That wasn't even what did it, though. For Sanji, what did it was the moment one of your waitresses had come back with the food they had ordered and he had tasted the dish he had watched you prepare with the ease and expertise of someone who clearly loved and lived for their profession. One bite and he nearly moaned there, masking it under a hum of appreciation.

Even Luffy was looking at the food star eyed and his speed in sucking up the food somehow increased. Sanji tried to not do the same, wanting to savour the taste as long as he could but it was clear that if he took too long, Luffy would have finished it all by then.

The hotel was nearly empty by the time they were done and they were one of the only customers still remaining. Sanji was sure it was dark enough outside that they would need light to make their way back to the ship. You were finishing off, calling out orders for the girls who were starting to clear up. You caught his eye and Sanji couldn't look away, mesmerised by the sight of you removing your hat and shaking your hair free. You were gorgeous, a good cook, and had the personality of a firework. He had to do something–

"Let's take her with us!" Luffy announced suddenly, banging his hand on the table. Everyone startled and Sanji stared at him as if he has grown two heads.

"Uh Luffy, that's kidnapping–" Nami's words died out the moment she noticed you walking up to their table.

"Hey there," you gave them all a small smile. "Will you guys be needing anything else or should I draw up the bill? I'm afraid it's getting close to closing time."

"Come with us!!" Luffy grinned. You paused and looked at him weirdly.

"Sorry?" You said.

"What he means, mademoiselle," Sanji intervened, giving you the most charming smile he had, "is that your food was absolutely delicious. Our captain would like to have you onboard as a chef."

You were silent, staring at them all with a blank look, until you finally looked at Sanji. Your gaze made him putty but he tried to remain firm.

"You don't have a cook or something?" You smiled, a little amused.

"Sanji is the cook!" Luffy answered, pointing a finger at the blonde man, who was too busy giving you googly eyes to answer. You cocked an eyebrow at that, looking at the said man.

"And you don't mind another chef invading your territory?" You asked, curious. The crew didn't seem to be more than the people in your hotel. There really didn't seem to be any need for an extra chef to you; and anyway, you were happy with your little hole in the wall place. You were just asking because you were curious, not because you actually planned to join them.

"If it's you, you can invade any space of mine, my lady," Sanji's eyes had turned into hearts as he uttered the words. Nami whacked him on the head, worried he would freak you out but that earned him a loud laugh from you.

"You're funny," you grinned, looking back at Luffy with an apologetic smile. "Unfortunately, I'm happy where I am. Thanks for the offer but I can't. Now, are you gonna pay up or…?"

Luffy looked like he was going to protest but Usopp held him back. Nami grumbled as she pulled out the pouch of money to pay off their bill and yet all Sanji could think of was begging you to join them. He didn't need another person to cook; he was quite enough. But you, with all your loud beauty, were like a sparkling gem he would never find again. He wanted to have you, to know you, to know all your little quirks and interests. He wanted to cook beside you and fall in love– with cooking and with you, all over again.

The crew started to make their way out but Sanji lingered back, making his way towards you. You noticed and gave him a smile, noting that he really was handsome when he wasn't all heart eyed and half a puddle.

"Is there any way I can change your mind?" He blurted out, feeling his insides shake in anticipation.

"I don't know," you teased, suddenly starting to contemplate if it wouldn't be such a bad idea. You had always wanted to travel, to cook for all kinds of people with all kinds of ingredients; you just never could and had to make do with a small hotel on a small island. Wasn't this a chance to make your dreams come true? "What can you do to convince me?"

"Anything you want from me, mademoiselle," he said breathlessly, gently picking up your hand to press a soft kiss on the back of it. Your heart fluttered at the action, and you flushed. No one had ever treated you like this, like you were something delicate and priceless and every moment you looked in Sanji's eyes made you feel like you were about to be set on fire.

"W- Well," you stuttered, feeling like you had lost control, "how about you help with the dishes then?"

Surely he would not agree to that. This was just a game, and it was time he would back out. You would go back to your little place, and he would go back to his ship. There was no way he would be okay with–

"Is that all it takes, my lady?" The light purr in his voice made your cheeks feel warm.

"N- no, it's just the start," you turned away from him, trying to hide the blush rising up your cheeks. He was far too good looking to be paying you so intense attention and there was something about him that was capturing your heart, tempting it to agree to his words. If you left your girls behind, who would take care of them? All those men who treated them like they were dolls on display would not just disappear the moment you left the island. You couldn't leave them…

"Then, show me the way," he smiled at you, all perfect white teeth shining under the golden lights of your hotel. You just pointed him to the tower of dishes that his own crew had left behind and watched a little astonished as he really started to wash them.

"He's certainly one of a kind," your fellow cook and friend nudged you as she spoke. You couldn't look away from him as you answered her.

"I don't know what it is about him, but whenever he looks at me, I feel…" You abruptly cut off, feeling embarrassed. "Nothing!"

"You feel nothing?" You friend teased, "That blush on your cheeks doesn't look like nothing to me~"

"Shut up," you growled, hackles raised at the teasing. You never fared well with being teased or flirted with, and unfortunately, it seemed the blonde man– Sanji, his captain had called him, you remembered –was exactly of the latter type. He was no good for you, right?

"I don't know," your friend sighed, drawing up a sad smile as she looked at you. "I know your dream. Even if you don't feel anything for him, I know their offer is a chance for you. Why don't you just take it?"

"I can't leave you all behind," you murmured, heart paining at the thought of ditching them just for your dreams. "If I'm not here, what if–"

"Nothing's gonna happen," your friend interrupted you. "Come on, we aren't no weaklings. And I'm here, aren't I? I'll make sure everyone is safe and taken care of. So don't worry about us and go get your man– I mean, go fulfil your dreams."

You whacked her arm at the teasing, smiling genuinely as you watched Sanji finish off the dishes already. He was so fast, and you couldn't help but feel silly for finding that sexy. Competence and confidence was always sexy.

"Alright," you mumbled to yourself. "I'll do it. But, I think I'll take my time. I did say this is just the start."

Your friend raised an eyebrow at your amused smile. Sanji waved at you to indicate that he was done and you waved back, starting to make your way to him.

"It's more fun this way, isn't it?"

°•❀•°

[thisapplepielife]

Written for a @astrangersummer.

What You Need For Today

Week #3 Prompt: Flowers | Word Count: 1400 | Rating: T | POV: Lucas | Pairings: Lucas/Max | Characters: Lucas, Dustin, Steve, Erica, Max | CW: Language | Tags: Post S4, Recovering, Buying Flowers, Dustin Has Opinions (Doesn't He Always), Hospital Visits, Always the Goddamn Babysitter Steve (But He Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way)

Looking through the glass door of the cooler, Dustin at his side, Lucas checks out all his options. They all kind of look the same to him, to be honest. Different colors aside, they are just flowers wrapped in paper or arranged in vases. 

He can't stand here forever, so he opens the door and reaches for the nearest bouquet, one wrapped in a pale blue.

"That looks like it's for a new baby! She didn't have a baby!" Dustin snaps, shoving him out of the way. Lucas moves away from the door, willingly. He isn't sure what he should pick, doesn't have the brain power left to decide, so any help, even if it's just Dustin steamrolling him, will be better than nothing.

Dustin is rifling through the options, touching them all far too rough, and Lucas doesn't want to be associated with this at all. The florist isn't looking, isn't paying any attention to either of them, but Lucas is not in the mood to be yelled at. Not today.

The place has had a steady stream of customers, in and out, and he assumes that's because so many people are still hurt, still grieving, after the town was ripped to shreds. And those who stayed need to do something, anything, to feel like they're helping. And buying flowers, that's normal, a relic remaining from before.

He understands that, deeply.

Dustin is still making a spectacle of choosing, so Lucas looks over his shoulder, and sees Erica sitting on the bench by the door of the shop, feet scuffing against the tile of the floor, ever so slightly. Uncharacteristically quiet. The way she's been since, well, since. He wishes she'd get up and come over and have an opinion just as strong as Dustin's.

Embarrass him, shame him, anything.

But she doesn't.

"You need to get these," Dustin finally declares, picking up a huge bundle of red roses.

"I can't afford those," Lucas hisses, because while he doesn't know the price, he knows they are damn well out of his price range. His allowance is good, but it's not that good.

"Can you put a price on love?" Dustin asks, like it's that simple.

Lucas takes the flowers from him, and puts them back, "Not those. Someday. But not today."

Dustin rolls his eyes, "Fine. Be a dumbass. See if I care."

And Lucas just stares through the glass, again. Still unsure. 

He isn't sure how long he's stood there, mulling, unable to choose, when he hears from behind them, "What are you little dickheads doing here?" 

Oh, thank god. Steve. 

Maybe he can rein in Dustin, or at the very least, distract him.

"What are you doing here?" Dustin crows, like he's caught Steve doing something he shouldn't be. 

"None of your business, you little twerp. And I asked you first," Steve says, and Dustin is getting wound up, Lucas can see it.

"Help me pick flowers for Max," Lucas says in a rush, cutting Dustin off before he has the chance to derail this opportunity.

"Well, you can't go wrong with red roses," Steve says, and Dustin throws his hands up in an 'I told you so' motion. 

That's not enough for Dustin, it never is, he has to rub salt in the wound, given an opportunity, so Dustin adds, "I told you so."

"I know, I know," Lucas says, conceding, "but I don't think that's, uh, exactly, right," Lucas says, "for the…occasion."

And Steve nods, like he's understanding what Lucas is laying down.

"Of course, you're totally right," Steve agrees, arm draped over his shoulders as he's standing next to him, also looking, while Dustin prances around impatiently. 

Lucas is leaning towards the yellow bouquet. It's pretty, and bright, and would really liven up Max's hospital room. Even if she can't see it. Even if she'll never know it's there.

When he brings her red roses, he wants her to know it.

"How about the yellow?" Steve asks, finger pushed against the glass, pointing at the arrangement that Lucas was contemplating.

"That's what I was thinking," Lucas admits, happy to have confirmation that it's a good pick.

"Max will love them," Steve says, and reaches in and plucks them out of the cooler, handing them to Lucas, then demands, "Henderson, go get him a blank get well soon card from the counter."

Dustin grumbles about it, but blunders away.

Once he's gone, Steve's voice is low, "You got enough, Sinclair? If not, I can loan you some cash."

It's nice. Steve is really Dustin's friend. Or even Erica's, in a weird way. But he still shows up when he's needed, and it hasn't gone unnoticed. 

"Thanks, Steve. But I think I do."

And Steve just nods, turning back towards the cooler, reaching in and grabbing a big bundle of the red roses.

Dustin reappears, and they both stare at Steve.

Steve looks back at them, "What are you little shitheads looking at? It's a classic, and I like what I like. You don't mess with what works."

"And red roses? They work?" Lucas asks.

"I told you that, asshole," Dustin says, adding his two cents, yet again. 

"For some occasions they definitely do, but these yellow ones? That's what you need for today," Steve reassures, and Lucas puffs out his chest, feeling happier, more confident about his decision. 

They both pay, and on the way out, Steve stops in front of Erica and pulls one of the roses out of the bouquet in his hand, holding it out for her to take. She rolls her eyes, but gives him a smile, and it's one of the few Lucas has seen her offer up in days, weeks.

Erica takes the rose, and Steve lowers his hand over her head, like he's going to touch her hair. Lucas wouldn't recommend it, but she takes care of herself, like always.

"Watch it, nerd," she says, batting his hand away, and Steve stops short of touching her, but he's made her happy. Lucas can tell, and he wishes he'd have thought of it first. Maybe it wouldn't have been the same, coming from him, her brother. Maybe it had to come from Steve Harrington, the ringleader of her beloved Scoops Troop.

"Good thing you showed up, we need a ride home," Dustin demands, not asking, never asking. 

"Maybe I have other places to be, Henderson. You ever think of that?" Steve snarks at him, holding up the roses, but he still unlocks his car, letting them all inside. Erica puts on her seatbelt beside him in the backseat, clutching the stem of the rose in her hands, looking out the window.

Lucas wonders when, if, things will ever go back to normal.

Dustin and Steve banter in the front seat, lobbing barbs back and forth that are familiar and normal, so Lucas supposes that's a start, at least.

Later that afternoon, Erica standing at his back, Lucas pauses in the doorway of the hospital room, listening to the steady beeps of all the machines keeping Max alive. The vase of yellow flowers in one hand, a new Stephen King book in the other. This time, he checked out Skeleton Crew from the library. It's a short story collection, and he likes the idea of having something new, something fresh, to read to her everyday during visiting hours. 

A new story for a new day.

She's still asleep, body still broken and trying to mend, and it squeezes at his heart. He doesn't know when they'll let her try to wake up. How long it might be, even if it has already felt like forever. Her hair is braided to the side, bold red against the white pillow, and that means El must have been here earlier. 

The vinyl creaks as Erica sits down on the couch behind him. She's been a near constant presence at his side since the Creel house. She goes where he goes, and he honestly has no complaints.

He places the flowers on Max's end table, and scoots the chair up as close to her bed as he can get it. Once he's situated, he cracks open the book, smoothing his hands over the borrowed pages, holding it in his lap, as he begins to read.

"This is what happened. On the night that the worst heat wave in northern New England history finally broke..."

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @astrangersummer and follow along with the fun! 🌞

Notes: The end book snippet is from The Mist, the first entry in Skeleton Crew.

[8turning]

HII can u do a 8turn headcannon abt how they r like crushing on the reader and what they do to show the reader their love for them ?

thank you for this request!! apologies that it took me so long 💔

☆⠀⠀8TURN — when they're pining for you !

hyung line + jangshinz (separately) x gn ! reader ★ fluff. mutual pining. ★ headcannon

warnings: swearing. physical affection. let me know if i missed anything!

n. i have a similar headcannon here about how they'd show their love; this fic will focus more on how they pine for reader since a lot of my thoughts are already shared on that post!! ♡ also this derailed a bit,,, there's implied confessions HELP sorry 🤒

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀〈 REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED ! 〉

⁰⁰¹ : JAEYUN.

wouldn't realize he liked you until someone pointed it out to him 1/2 🤕

^ he would regret thinking deeper about what yoonsung had told him: "are you sure you don't feel anything for them?" . . . queue a montage of every single memory he has with you where his stomach did a "weird flip" that he never chose to acknowledge.

basically. jaeyun was fucked LOL

BUT despite his revelation, he managed to keep himself composed pretty well. he was never overly affectionate with the members so him suddenly getting lost in his thoughts a lot wasn't exactly foreign.

what was foreign, though, was his very apparent distance.

to be fair, he wasn't fully aware he was doing it. it was more so "when i'm around them i get this Feeling. i cant handle that Feeling right now," then he kinda just. goes somewhere else for the time being.

you'd realize it, overthink it all, and text him on a whim that you needed to talk to him.

he'd get so nervous and only then would he really think about his behavior and . . . yeah you deserved an explanation, even if it resulted in rejection for him :(

he wouldn't speak first. he'd want you to feel welcomed to let out any emotion you were feeling; you were the one who wanted to talk, it wouldn't be right of him to take over.

he'd know that no matter his reason, him suddenly avoiding you and saying "i didn't realize" wasn't going to cut it, so swallowing whatever anxiety he had, he confessed then and there. it wasn't too in depth, of course, but it didn't feel right for him to hide it any longer - especially after everything.

but, the silence that followed his confession made all the anxiety bubble up again, only for you to speak about your reciprocated feelings.

in an unknown way, him pulling back from you is what brought you two together in the end; strange how that works.

⁰⁰² : MYUNGHO.

he's not shy in the slightest LMFAOO 💀 it'd be more shocking if you didn't know he liked you.

it doesn't even matter if you two were hanging out with other people either, he'd make a point to sit by you during a movie. even if it wasn't a horror movie, he'd still tell you that if you're scared, you can cling to him (as if he is any better with scary movies . . . his arm ends up around your shoulder anyways).

he's not usually one for talking during a movie, but he cant help but crack jokes here and there, using that as an excuse to lean in closer to you and watch as you try to hold your laughter in, his eyes watching you adoringly.

myungho would pull you into your own little world when you're with one another,,, he'd literally be so obvious about his feelings for you i'm crying.

openly flirting and complimenting you non-stop,,, holding eye contact if you ever caught him looking at you,,,

myungho would literally tell you how much he liked you straight up 🤭 "i like you a lot, y'know that?" "i'm so glad i met you." "you'll let me stay with you, right?"

the only time EVER he'd get shy if it was you who initiated something. he'd actually lose his mind.

it'd be such a stark contrast to the myungho you knew previously that you couldn't help but laugh a bit whenever you caught him like that.

holding his hand out of nowhere or leaning your head on his shoulder is a surefire way to make heat rise along his neck and make him go speechless.

he's so open about it and talks about you so much. his members are SICK OF HIM!!!! /j

minho probably threatened that if he doesn't make a move soon that he'll ask you out himself . . . you'd get a message from myungho the next morning ♡

⁰⁰³ : MINHO.

bye he's so so playful and he'd be able to cover up how he truly felt pretty well, which was both a positive and a negative for him.

positive: he'd be able to hug you nonchalantly or tap his cheek asking for a kiss and you'd think nothing of it.

negative: you'd think nothing of it.

since minho often acts this way with his friends as well, he slowly becomes self-conscious of his actions, worrying that that's all you saw him as - a friend.

he'd probably slowly try to either a: be more forward with you, or b: reserve certain actions for you only.

minho would stop blowing kisses to myungho and asking seungheon to kiss his cheek. he might even go as far as to not be as physically affectionate with his members anymore.

slowly letting you come to the conclusion yourself that the way he treats you is different from his members.

if you weren't the type to fight against him when he acted this way, if you suddenly started reciprocating the same actions towards him, his head would start spinning.

if it was a normal occurrence for you to return his energy, he'd start to wonder if you treated your friends like this as well.

but . . . he never saw you cling onto jaeyun's arms like you do with him . . . and you don't look at haemin the same way you look at him . . . hm . . .

minho crushing on you would be hard to detect until he made more of an effort to let his guard down about it.

you'd pick up on his behavior change pretty quickly which only opened the conversation of "why are you suddenly treating me like i'm special?"

(hint: its because you are special to him).

⁰⁰⁴ : YOONSUNG.

he is taking this to his GRAVE!!! he'd try to be so so so secretive and discreet.

yoonsung falls hard and doesn't want to overwhelm you with how he feels and everything :( wants to try and soak in the feeling of crushing on you but every time he sees you he just gets so overjoyed and just wants to confess right then and there.

which is why he feels he needs to take this to his grave 😭 he's not sure if he will ever be able to fully "calm down" around you enough to properly confess to you the way you deserve to be confessed (he thinks you deserve the world).

tries to act as Normal as he can around you, but most of the time i think he'd fall kind of silent.

whether you're with a group of friends or just talking one-on-one, he'd get so wrapped up in his thoughts and become uncharacteristically quiet.

it was a constant internal battle for yoonsung. he wanted to be near you but also knew he likely couldn't hide how he felt for much longer.

unlike minho, yoonsung wasn't going to hug you or hold your hand out of no where. he did this with his friends, sure, but he didn't see you as just a friend, which made physical affection towards you that much harder.

the lines would get blurred in his brain and he feared if you reciprocated, even if it was platonic, he'd make an assumption that could end up hurting him.

of course, yoonsung was unaware of your feelings towards him as well, and seeing him seemingly pulling away from you, you subconsciously do the same :(

he doesn't realize just how different he was acting towards you until that moment, and as if his heart took control over his brain, he'd spill all of his feelings for you, doing his best to explain away his behavior.

and it worked - who could stay mad at him for too long?

⁰⁰⁵ : HAEMIN.

wouldn't realize he liked you until someone pointed it out to him 2/2 💔

everything would be going perfectly fine for haemin,,, until minho jokingly commented about how much he liked you. then that became all he thought about.

begin haemin's internal debate of if he liked you romantically or not! and if it was true (it was), how long? upon actually giving it a lot of thought . . . he's liked you for a while without really processing his feelings effectively.

and now,,, he cannot properly face you!! at least, not in the beginning.

everything hits him so fast and he's forced to process his emotions at a rapid pace now. he does a decent job at hiding his inner turmoil about the topic, but he eventually confides in kyungmin about it (though it wasn't on purpose),, kyungmin just caught him while he was dazed!! totally not like he went to kyungmin stressing about possibly ruining your friendship hahaha . . .

once he was able to fully "recover" and process everything, he's a goner. heart eyes are permanent.

just so absolutely infatuated with everything you do and say. comes around more often and always manages to take the spot next to you if you're with a group of people.

always always always joking around with you because he loves the sound of your laugher and how happy you seem when you smile, especially when you smile because of him.

in a twisted ending, haemin is grateful that minho made him fall into a crisis. if he hadn't, he wouldn't have been able to have these moments with you.

once you end up together, minho rightfully takes full credits for the relationship starting, kyungmin taking credit for helping haemin get over his fear of ruining everything between you two.

so - albeit his disagreement - haemin accepts that they should get some credit for their help.

but how it all came to be doesn't matter much, as long as in the end, he ended up with you.

⁰⁰⁶ : KYUNGMIN.

i'm not usually fond of the trope of someone who brings up the person they like every time they can but,,,, kyungmin does exactly that. his members get so tired of him for it too HELP (he's gotten into the practice of just,, thinking of you instead of verbally bringing you up so often).

his members' anger (/j) doesn't stop him though!! every chance he gets he talks about you,, the only time that stops is when you're around 🧍‍♂️

you BET the members are gonna poke fun at him for that too LMFAO

when you're around, he'd be much more into listening rather than speaking himself.

"platonic" kisses on the backs of your hands. "platonic" hand holding. (nothing about it is platonic).

kyungmin would love love love to rest his head on your shoulder!! whether he's standing behind you while talking with a group of friends or sitting next to each other watching a movie, he just likes the feeling (bonus points if his arm is looped under yours to play with your fingers).

he'd be in his own head a lot,,, daydreaming and such,,, even though you're right next to him 🧍‍♂️

if you were to nudge him while he was like this, he'd look at you with the most love-filled gaze.

he didn't have to say anything to you, just from the way he looked at you and the light blush forming on his cheeks, you knew. the way your stomach filled with butterflies as you held his gaze was also a great indicator that his look meant something more.

it was then when he saw how your gaze changed too - it changed to one that matched his own. with a deep breath, he'd squeeze your hand before a smile spread across his face.

© 8turning 2023.

[princeescaluswords]

Seeing your Sterek thoughts is fun, because sometimes I'll want to read a fun story about like Parrish dating, idk, Peter or adult Theo, or want to talk about Teen Wolf for other side characters, and have to wade, knee deep, through Sterek and the ways every character are props for Stiles/Derek

It's a frustrating part of the TW fandom, how prevalent and inescapable the ship is

Here's something to think about.

Let's say you were entirely innocent of fandom and its wily ways. Let's say you watched a 100 episode television show named Teen Wolf. If another person, also entirely innocent of fandom, asked you what happened in it, what would you say? If another person asked you what were the most important relationships in the story, which ones would you list? If another person asked you who the lead protagonist was and asked you to describe that character's arc, how would you answer?

I am absolutely confident that the romantic relationship between Stiles and Derek would not appear in any of those answers. I could describe the entire plot, episode by episode, of Teen Wolf without even implying that Stiles and Derek were friends and it would be almost entirely complete. I would list the most important relationships as Scott and Stiles, and Scott and Derek, and Scott and Allison, and Scott and Kira, and Scott and Liam, and I would even include Stiles and Lydia. But the truth is, if Derek and Stiles had never had a scene alone together, it wouldn't ultimately change anything about the show. Furthermore, it is simply not credible to say that the lead protagonist isn't Scott McCall. Every character, every plot line, every resolution hinged on Scott's choices and behavior -- even the ones where the focus may have been on Stiles, such as the nogitsune arc and the wild hunt arc.

And, while this should go out with saying, it has to be said in order to forestall the tedious foot-stomping discussion-derailing simplistic arguments that usually happen at this point: there is nothing wrong with shipping Sterek. There is nothing wrong with enjoying what might have happened between these two but didn't. Shipping is not the problem.

The problem is the fandom's entitlement to force a romantic relationship between two white men into obscene prominence. The problem is that there is an entire culture based around recontextualizing an entire 100-episode show and a movie around a romantic relationship that didn't exist to such a degree that the actual reality of the story is often lost.

Whoever you are and whatever draws to you the story, once you engage with the fandom, there is one unstoppable force that swamps everything. Love it or hate it. Dread it. Run from it. Sterek arrives all the same. You have to deal with it. The only way to avoid Sterek is to avoid the fandom.

Staying clear of clearly-labeled Sterek content won't help, because the tropes that have grew out of Sterek have metastasized. For example, "Pack-Mom Stiles" has replaced Stiles's canon characterization in 90 percent of fandom content, even fandom content that has nothing to do with Sterek. Think about "Oblivious Scott" and "Stupid Scott." These tropes appeared in order to explain why Scott wasn't aware of Stiles's true feelings for Derek and have now become the baseline for any analysis of Scott's behavior, even though it was Scott who figured out how to convince Derek to turn on Peter, Scott who noticed and took advantage of Gerard's cancer, Scott who noticed that Derek painting only one side of a door in a falling down house, etc., etc., ad nauseam.

Think about Scott and Derek's developing relationship throughout the show and when, in the final episode, Derek and Scott hug after not seeing each other for a long time and one person bravely posted on the Internet, "As a Sterek shipper, I reject this." Or Sterek shippers who hated the movie without watching it. They are so firmly entrenched in this entitled alternative world that they feel they have the right to invalidate scenes that actually occur on the screen.

I could go on, for like, an hour, but there are even worse aspects. This culture influenced the production because it became so omnipresent during public relations events (conventions, polls, etc) that they couldn't really ignore it anymore. Think about 6B's ridiculous and demeaning "Stiles, in his first day at the FBI, sees recycled film of shirtless Derek" scene. Or the uselessness of the line in the movie about Stiles having his own fires to put out. If you were our theoretical individual not exposed to fandom, you must have wondered why that line and that scene were even filmed!

At a certain point, the production realized that they had been caught in an inescapable trap. If they didn't include scenes where Stiles and Derek interacted with each other -- such as season 3B -- they were accused of homophobia and queerbaiting; if they did include scenes where Stiles and Derek interacted with each other -- such as Season 4 -- but the relationship didn't become canon, they were accused of homophobia and queerbaiting. By this point, they must have felt that they had no choice as Sterek -- something the production had never intended nor even indicated -- had become so much a part of the fandom perspective that they felt they had to do something to acknowledge it.

I'm sure you can point out other fandoms where something like this happened, and I'm sure you can point out that fandom response became so extreme that it damaged the story itself. But we got Sterek, and we have to deal with it.

[dionysism]

do u want to rant abt theseus or any greek hero with various perceptions here ??

why yes! i certainly do!

okay theseus. this is my personal thoughts on him and it's not all based in mythos (some is but i definitely derail from it a bit with him i just Love to spin him around in my brain) and some of it does happen to line up with how the hades game characterized him which is funny and so personally catering to me but i'm not necessarily referring to his hades counterpart. but you could certainly read it in relation to him if you wanted!

i think theseus is really interesting and part of this comes from him having varying mythos from various accounts that all have their own take on him. some are sympathetic towards him (forced by dionysus to leave ariadne behind & he was so distraught that's what caused him to forget to change his sails) while others paint him in a less kind light (he just ditched her) and sometimes he's kind of stupid (going into the underworld with his best friend thinking they could capture persephone for the best friend to marry) and yet he's also very clever (out-witting and reversering the tatics onto his enemies in his six labors) so he's really fun to play with as a character because there's a lot you can do with him without really being "wrong" because it just depends on what you're pulling from & he has a lot. someone else mentioned it before in my tags and it's something i also find neat about him and it's that he's there for other hereos at their lowest (when herakles kills megara & the kids and his kindness to oedipus when everyone else is afraid his mere presence will curse them by proxy)

an interpretation of him i've always had (and i say interpretation because there isn't really anything that says theseus' confidence is a front in antiquity) is that he is secretly insecure and just overcompensates by acting very confident. and it's not to say that his insecurity has any real basis, with the six labors, the minotaur, divine parentage and so forth, he obviously is very successful and a great warrior. but you know. he had to earn it. he grew up in his mother's village and it wasn't until he moved the rock and claimed his father's sword & sandals and went to athens that he got his birth right. and his dad almost let him get poisoned until he recognized said sandals and sword 😭 and not long after that off to serve the city and slay the minotaur and it's like this post which is more about hades theseus but a good point and relevant he is the savior (and in many ways the mascot) of athens and poseidon is his parent too and i feel like all together this could add up to an extreme unwillingness to ever fail at anything ever. for god child theseus to fail is for athens to fail, and, you wouldn't want athens to fail, would you? of course not. i mean even the six labors. he didn't have to do that. he could have gone the quick & safe route by sea, and i mean yeah, obviously he didn't because this is greek mythology and there's no myth if he takes the easy path but it's also interesting to think about in the light of him needing to prove himself. and also, i think, he's a bit of an adrenaline junkie. like really enjoys the thrill of battle. maybe a little too much. like he's kind of a freak. i imagine a variation of him where the minotaur fight, with his bare hands (my fav depiction) was the most exciting experience of his life & he genuinely enjoyed the fight.

and him and ariadne. oh i love all kinds of varying takes and accounts and interpretations of them. theseus and ariadne are so fun. i mean really, any way you spin it (spin it.. like thread..). deceitful cunning theseus who feigns love for aid and leaves her behind once he gets what he needed. and yet, even then, he still took her with him. could've left her there in crete to face her treachery, if he cared so little, but he allowed her to flee with him. interesting! or perhaps, no, he did love her, perhaps more than anyone ever again, but a god had set his sights on her and so theseus had to let her go. and so stricken with grief was he that he forgot to change his sails, and well, how fitting, because he said he would change them if he was victorious, and was he? or even a ulysses dies at dawn type spin on them: neither of them care for the other at all! her using him purely as pr, "look how i've aided the hero in slaying the monster! and we're going to get married!" and him, "why, yes, of course i love you, and of course everyone will know we did it together!" only to spin around, take all the credit, and scorn her. (if you can't tell from my other posts i love udad theseus & ariadne lol) there's even one account he forgot her on naxos totally on accident and by the time he got back dionysus had already married her. which is just so?:$/?/ how do you forget to pack your fiancé 😭😭 i also like a take where he did love her, yes, but going back to that insecurity and unwillingness to fail i think he would be the type of person that would overthink things, assume you're going to leave him, and immediate respond by trying to save face and pride by leaving you first. i could see him on naxos in a moment of weakness and doubt thinking love gives her too much power over him and leaving her before she could hurt him. which, had they worked out, i don't think she ever would have. but i do like her with dionysus better anyway :P but ultimately no matter the variation i do believe theseus loved ariadne. even when he left her without divine influence, even in variations where it's despite himself. but i don't think they were meant to be.

and phaedra, oh god. he really did love phaedra. "how I long for it! long to lie dead. robbed as i am of the world of your love. your death is my death." & "you left me, you left, beloved one, finest of women seen by the light of the sun, or the starfaced night." (anne carson hippolytus trans) like i'm actually sick... robbed as i am of the world of your love are you kidding me. i think theseus is capable of so much love despite how many people think he's an asshole of a character. and i won't argue that he isn't also an asshole. because i mean yeah. but the love is there and i think you should know the love is there! theseus and phaedra. theseus "stain my clothes with the blood of your children i don't care i'm your friend." (paraphrased anne carson's herakles trans) theseus "never, i tell you, i will never shrink from a stranger, lost as you are now, or fail to lend a hand and save a life." (fagles oedipus at colonus trans) theseus "hateful to me is a gratitude that grows old. a friend who enjoys your prosperity but refuses to sail with your grief." (anne carson herakles trans) i mean i just. god. he's such a character to me.

but yeah tl:dr the theseus in my brain is a kind of insecure, overcompensating with over confidence, borderline adrenaline junkie that's ever endlessly proving he is The Great Theseus they all perceive him to be and gripping to this perception like a life line. if i am not the greatest i am nothing etc etc you get me. i think he can be selfish & an asshole but he is also full of love and proves this in how hes shown with phaedra, herakles, oedipus and, depending on your variation, ariadne. and again i definitely stray a little from mythos with my perception of him but it has its roots

& since you said "or any greek hero" i was also going to prattle off about my fav of all favs, odysseus, but this was wayyyyy longer than i intended it to be so i think i'm just gonna let theseus have this one for himself 😭

[itstheelvenjedi]

4/27/23 EDIT TO ADD: I'm disabling reblogs on this part of the post as per the advice of someone in the tags to prevent it from going around and getting out of hand but obligatory disclaimer that this is NOT an accurate post to my current state of mind. In absolute simplest terms: I'm both physically disabled and ND, and the past 2 years have been a very shitty time for me with a lot of trauma and ableism etc. etc. BUT which ultimately helped me to grow into a more emotionally mature person who absolutely would not have said these things. It's not an excuse but it is context, and if I had known (didn't remember I queue'd this and the first I knew it existed was when I woke up and checked this tumblr for the first time in almost 3 weeks and I had almost 100 notes on a single post LMAO) it was there, I would have deleted it before it got posted. I've made another post in a reblog chain >HERE&lt; that goes into this but this is like a TL;DR if you will. You can also find a stand-alone post with the copy-paste of the ammendment >HERE&lt; or in my pinned post (I'll leave it here for a while and take it down later once this blows over)

EDIT #2: currently trying to figure out how to disable replies but can't seem to so I'm putting this at the TOP of the damned post instead because there's still a handful of people that think it's appropriate to make nasty comments without actually READING the ammendment, I'm sorry if I sound cranky it's been a long day, I am v tired & running out of ways to say the word "sorry" lol

The thing that gets me about the "oh wanting a cure for the incurable disability that ruins my life is not ableism ACSHUALLY!!!" crowd is

Yes babes, yes it is. That's a lil nugget called ✨internalised ableism✨ and ya know something? ITS STILL ABLEISM

You can put a pretty red bow with polka dots and frills on a pig as much as you like but it's STILL A FUCKING PIG and NOTHING You do will change that

But most of yall aren't ready for that conversation ig.

It's hard. It's a very hard thing to confront, realise and accept but it IS. and ableists EVERYWHERE will use that as a pro-eugenics gotcha. You're not just hurting yourself you're hurting other disabled people too.

ABLE BODIED PEOPLE DO NOT ADD ANYTHING TO THIS POST. YOU ARE NOT DISABLED AND YOU ARE NOT QUALIFIED TO TALK ABOUT WHAT IS OR IS NOT DIFFICULT FOR DISABLED PEOPLE. Able bodied ND people may add stuff if you want but be aware if you try to derail physically disabled additions w/ "buh muh ND ish awso a disabiwity" I will straight up block you. Yall ALWAYS do that and I am tired of it. Just don't be an asshole about your additons if you're going to make any or stay quiet too.

[groovyghostie]

Vent about disability, ableism, and grief ahead, proceed with caution.

I do understand why my mother doesn't want or like to think of me as disabled. A lot of my symptoms and problems came about recently, or, at least I masked and sucked it up and tried not to complain until it got so bad that that just wasn't feasible anymore. And she wants my life to be healthy, easy, and above all else, happy. Unfortunately, those first two aren't always feasible for me. Sometimes even the third one feels out of reach. But as soon as I express that, express any kind of frustration, she meets me with pushback. She says I have to push through, or I need to have a positive attitude, or wouldn't some fresh air and a Tylenol make you feel better? Have you tried getting some sleep? Maybe you're just not taking care of yourself. We had a discussion about it just yesterday evening, and I do think it will get better. I just wish it didn't come at the expense of interpersonal friction between myself and my only living parent. I just wish my dad were here to calm both of us, to be the voice of reason as he and my mom so often took turns doing. I wish he were here to tell me it's going to be okay. I want a hug, but not just any hug. I want one from him. I couldn't sleep last night because I took my first dose of my first ever ADHD stimulant yesterday morning. When it wore off, I crashed, right around 11pm. I didn't start to feel sleepy until about 6am, though, so I just killed time mindlessly through the night. I'm going to keep taking it, but at this point in time, the benefits just don't seem to be worth the cost. And I'm away from home for the night (last night), so I'm missing my fianceé terribly. I don't know, this is a mess, but I think the point I was trying to make is that, sometimes you lose people, or people fail to understand you, or your Most Important Person can't be there 24/7. And that sucks. But the ones who try are worth hanging onto for as long as possible. My mom is going to try to be a better ally, and I trust her on that. My fianceé is there a good 90% of the time, and that is more than enough. My sibling is always trying to help me. My sister loves me enough to put up with me using her as my middle man for getting my fianceé some of that Devil's Lettuce when they hurt too bad to function. My dad is gone, but that's not his fault, and if it happens in my lifetime, I will celebrate the day humanity cures cancer in his honor. I may not be able to make work or be very productive right now, but hopefully that'll change. Either way, I'm getting married soon. My life is just beginning. There's so much left for me, even if I get more than my share of chronic pain in my life, even if I struggle daily with anxiety and executive function and social cues for the rest of my life. I want to live, not just survive. I hope I get to see a world where I, and all other people like me, are allowed that much.

P.S. I am physically disabled AND neurodivergent. This post is not about one or the other, so you won't be derailing by just talking about one, and I don't mind if people derail anyway, as it was all over the place from the very beginning. Talked about my dad more than I meant to. But hopefully, someone will relate.

[slanax]

re lrb but in a new post bc it kinda derails from the original point of the post but

FE3H really dealt a blow to the concept of unique characters that Engage didn't manage to fully recover from

like as units, most characters start in the exact same class at the exact same level. Great start. Their class progression gives them all the same options for the same requirements outside of a handful of genderlocked classes which is the stupidest possible point to put your single distinguishing feature. The Tier 0 classes Noble and Commoner are different classes but are identical in gameplay. Why not make that your distinguishing feature that locks class access to characters? Would fit better with the story themes anyways.

Nominally some characters are better at some weapons and worse at others. This does not matter except maybe your Tier 3 promotion on Maddening gets delayed by a chapter or you need to rig the exams a bit more (luck based promotions by the way. Also terrible. Costs resources to even try. I digress.) The high end S+ ranks are functionally unreachable anyways.

Also doesn't help that outside of exactly two exceptions (magic, and gauntlets on mounts) every Tier 1 class can use every weapon type exactly as well as each other. There's no reason for a brawling character to go Brawler. Just go Brigand, they have more Str ("Just go Brigand" applies to every unmounted melee class by the way)

Then there's the mastery skills. Brigands get Death Blow. Everyone wants Death Blow. Archers get Hit +20. Everyone wants Hit +20. So you already have characters that all play the same, in classes that all play the same, but now every one of them cycles through Brigand and Archer to truly be. the same.

And then even if you want to sandbox and go "I'm gonna make a cavalier that uses swords instead of lances" Tier 2 shows up and tells you "what are you, stupid? Paladin is a lance class. See, they get Lancefaire. Put a lance on that guy you fucking moron. Who told you sandboxing was okay."

You'd think Tier 2/3 getting -faires would solve the issue of every class being the same weapons wise. Course it doesn't. Falcon Knight has Lancefaire, Wyvern Lord has like 2 less lance damage through raw Str. It does not matter and only serves to make you feel bad for not using the "correct" weapon type and losing out on the +5 boost.

The thing that actually distinguishes characters is their personal skills. Except most of those fall off and stop mattering after the earlygame bc they're like +2 or +4 boosts to stats that'll be in the 20s soon enough.

No, the thing that actually actually distinguishes characters is what skills and arts they learn. Shockingly, half the cast learns no skills that outclass the generic ones. So those don't matter. And of course, the game doesn't tell you about any of these, doesn't tell you if there will be a payoff for training a character in a certain skill over another or god forbid if that payoff will be worth it.

Engage gets a little better about this, at least the characters have a base class again, but it falls flat around midgame when reclassing is fully available. There's a lot of neat and unique class/emblem combos you can make, so at least the class samey-ness of 3H is fixed, but the characters become little more than warm bodies that carry that class/emblem combo into battle and some of them might have more optimal numbers for one of them.

anyways the way I think this can be fixed (outside of just getting rid of universal reclassing or going back to the Fates system of passing around class sets through supports) is to place more emphasis on personal skills. Class skills are generally just better in SwitchFE, and I don't get why. If personal skills give you a big boost that stays relevant throughout the game, even only in specific classes or circumstances, that encourages players to make use of that, use this specific unit for their personal skill, and create a tailored class build that specifically brings the best in that unit out. Or give them a specific gimmick. This hack I'm playing has a Cav that gets Brave but can't double when he moves his full Mov while mounted. That's a cool payoff. That makes him stand out. Do shit like that, intsys. In 3H this would just be the Cavalier mastery skill, and in Engage it'd be an Emblem skill, so everyone could do it. Just make it unique.

also make growths more distinct I'm tired of everyone having the same 35-45% slop in every stat god I wonder why every character feels the same when their statlines are fucking identical

[dredgen-dumbass]

Redo of my pinned post, again, because I'm indecisive.

At a glance:

No screen name, he/him. Predominantly SFW blog, tws follow the normal content of Destiny 2. I swear like a sailor. Not the type for dni lists, just don't be a bigot. Asks are open to all. I don't mind mass likes/reblogs, and dw about derailing. The rest is under the cut.

Message from yours truly,

I genuinely thought I was going to just spam Drifter content for a few days, and then go delete Tumblr again once my brain calmed down about it. As it turns out, that isn't happening. I like the community here so far, which isn't something I've been able to say about Tumblr for some time now, and it seems like I'm going to stick around a while longer. That, and I thought I was just fixated on the one character, but Destiny itself is becoming a pretty big interest of mine, and I know I'll need somewhere to talk about it, so this is going to shift more towards that. I'm going to try to be a bit more cautious with tags so I'm not filling them with every Destiny related through that crosses into my brain, so I'm going to set up an (albeit shoddy) tagging system and be a bit more conservative with what gets put in the main D2 tag. Apologies if I flooded anything you follow, I'm used to posting in a much larger fandom where things get buried really quick, I didn't realize how bad it was until I tried to go through those tags myself, and... eesh.

So, me.

I know it's Tumblr culture to put every last detail in your bio, but personally I'm not comfortable with that. If you need more than I give, then just click off and move on. I understand wanting some idea of who you're talking to, but I think the things that matter will come up naturally through my posts. What I do think should be clarified, just as a matter of perspective with all the queer stuff in this fandom, is that I'm a gay dude. Other than that, I don't think any labels are relevant to this account. If something else becomes relevant, feel free to ask for clarification, I understand that some things read differently depending on who's saying them. Otherwise, respect my privacy, thanks.

Fandom chaos & such,

I want to keep discourse away from my blog, both fandom and real-world. Especially real-world, because Destiny is an escape for me, and I want to keep this as a separate space I've carved for myself, in the same way as the game is for me. That said, bigots can fuck off to hell. Y'all ain't welcome here just because I'm not interacting with the arguments. This is a safe space for everyone, provided you ain't making it unsafe for anyone else.

Destiny stuff,

I'm a casual player, have been going for about 3 years now. I'm a solar titan main.

My favorite character is drifter, I've been pretty clear on that, I think (/s). I'm still learning the game lore and such, so at the moment he's the only character I've actually gone in-depth reading about.

My other favorites are saint-14, saladin, shaxx, and ghost.

Expect my posts to mostly be about them.

This isn't a ship blog, though I may reblog ship content occasionally. I don't have any I particularly care for, aside from O14, but to me they're different because it's canon. Again, asks are open if you want to hear me talk about a specific ship.

I have been asked specifically about drifteris because I post sm about Drifter, and no I'm not a drifteris shipper. I read their relationship as platonic, and if I post about both of 'em it's not a shipping thing. I'm glad the ship brings more attention to the characters, though.

Fanart & fics,

I'll be honest, I've written a few short pieces of my yw. I don't plan on posting them, and even if I do I'm not sure that I'll connect them to this blog in any way. that's a question for future me, whether that's tomorrow or years from now.

Fanart is a pain for me right now. I want to make stuff, and I've done a little, but I'm currently in the traditional artist picks up digital art learning curve, so I'll probably continue to post and delete and post and delete. Feel free to repost my art, just credit me. Honestly, I haven't signed anything atp because I just don't expect anyone to repost it anyways, but as I progress that may become an issue and I don't want to be updating this weekly. Fanart requests are entirely open, destiny ocs included, I need the practice anyway. I do already have some sitting in my asks, so I'll be doing those first, but still.

I don't sit and vet all every account I reblog, so if I reblog something stolen or just uncredited let me know and I'll tag the artist.

If you have m/m or m/neutral (or just platonic) fic recommendations feel free to send em over. Gotta have something to keep me occupied.

Tagging system?

I've never made one of these before. I don't think I have the time to go through all of my previous posts and set them up with this, but from now on the structure will be:

#dredgenposting - all of my destiny-related rambling, because I don't want to fill the destiny 2 tag with my post spam.

#reblogs

#mild nsft - probably just sex jokes

#nsft - probably won't be used, but leaving it here in case it is so that I'm not coming back again to edit this

#discourse - not sure how much this will be used, but I'm bound to have a public opinion on something eventually

#fanart - my own fanart

#asks

if there's something you'd like tagged to filter in/out while looking through my blog, lmk. chances are I'm fine with incorporating it.

and that's it. thanks for reading, live long and prosper y'all.

[arginnit]

this was gonna be a semi serious post about inflation and the dollar from the perspective of a thirdworlder but it's way to vent-oriented to make sense as anything other than manic writhing in notes scattered about in a facility in a video game so whatever

I didn't want to derail this post and the general message of "food is too expensive and it should stop becoming more expensive" is the same but still

this is such a surreal post to read as someone who's lived in a "high inflation" country her whole life. a pound of butter 1 dollar??? 5 dollars??? a stick of of butter is like 700$ where I live. a month ago it was 500$ and next month we'll be paying it 1000 for sure

I understand that the price is more than 3x in the example but.. over 3 years? maybe my brain is completely fried by whatever chemical the government puts in the water to make us like futbol so much but that almost seems completely reasonable to me??

I cannot take any conversation about inflation from the us seriously. I'm unable to.

my perspective on what "1 dollar" means is so completely derailed and skewed I cannot get it through my head that it's a currency people use every day to buy gum and chips

I have dollars, in a drawer, kept in a sealed bag and neatly folded.

dollars are for big transactions. no one trusts the peso, if you buy a house, a car, a Motorbike even. the price will be in dollars and people will prefer if you pay them with them too

dollars are movie money. it's the default stand-in for "currency" when talking for many.

i might have slipped before when speaking English and say "this costed 30 dollars" when in reality I meant pesos

they're not the same, 30 pesos is not 30 dollars.

30 dollars is around 27.000 pesos.

and hey! big number I guess! but my mother and I went grocery shopping last week and spent 16k on a week and a half worth of stuff.

it doesn't fucking mean anything.

years ago,god knows how many, I would buy a sandwich every other day. it costed 12$ at first.

nowdays the same kind of sandwich will run you 800$

coins are now 10 or 5 pesos but the smallest bill that you're gonna need to buy anything is probably 100 ACTUALLY SCRATCH THAT LITERALLY NOTHING IS UNDER 100 NOWDAYS el guaimallen está 120 creo. the next big bill is 500.

you want a small meal at a cafe? you're looking at a 8k receipt at the very least. that's 8 1000 bills or 4 of the new and terribly ugly 2000 ones!

I don't know where I'm going with this, i guess the prices seem worse when the base number is higher, maybe I should start buying gold and shit fuck If I know.

quien chota nos mandó a ganar el mundial literalmente nada bueno vino después de eso saquenme de aca

[ectoplasmic-entity]

*shakes tin can full of coins* Kai lore? Spare Kai lore? What's his past? What he got going on? How he met Dan?

Simply put: He doesn't really remember much of his true origins.

Kai looks like a ghost, acts like a ghost. It's all good and dandy... if it weren't for one little thing. He's mimicked and learned those behaviours, he's very good at it, but does slip up once in a blue moon.

The light or shadow catches his face in a certain way, a flicker of something that doesn't seem... quite right. Not emotive most of the time, but has a very unsettling smile coupled with sharp, inhuman teeth, when he does display emotion. Unexplained instances that can't simply be waved off as ghost behaviour.

There are things out there, beyond ghosts, and far beyond the Ghost Zone. Kai is subconsciously aware of this, but his mind blocks it so he doesn't look further into it. He kinda knows but doesn't understand fully.

Why? It's a complicated story, but to shorten it, whenever his core sustains too much damage and can no longer support his current body, his body gives out and he's forced to be "reborn" in a brand new one. But, with every "rebirth", Kai's mind becomes a blank slate and doesn't retain the memories of the previous iteration of himself.

Let's say you knew one iteration of him, but inexplicably vanishes and reappears many years later, no older than how you knew him long ago, but... he doesn't remember or know who you are. It's a cruel cycle, he doesn't connect with people very well as a result.

The reason Kai's core does that it because it's malformed. It still functions as it should, but it's not complete. The Kai someone would know is the logical portion of his personality, apathetic and not very emotive. He's capable of feeling the entire spectrum of emotions, his core just doesn't bring them to the forefront. Kai hates mirrors and reflective surfaces, and that's because it shows the missing portion of his personality, the emotional aspect his core. He gets anxious, because he'll see someone that looks like him but doesn't feel like him, and have these thoughts in his head that don't sound like his own (even though it is him). It's very stressful since he doesn't remember and may end up hurting himself and others around him, and possibly destroy any reflective surfaces.

I originally envisioned Kai as a "grim reaper"-like figure of the DP world. As you see what I've just shared, he's evolved and I think he'd be more fitting as the "Ghost of Rebirth", though he still does deal with the dead.

I'll explain Kai's relationship with Dan in another post. This one's already long enough and I didn't want to derail it lol. Um... yeah, I hope you found this interesting! (^o^)/