#i didn't know how much i needed wolverine to look like this until this movie came out

[iwasbored777]

Imagine if they looked like this in X-Men Origins: Wolverine cuz they're so pretty I want to cry 😭😭😭💛♥️

[bluetimeombre]

You, Oscar and Hugh

You and Hugh have stared in the most talked about movie of the year, so, for the biggest night in Hollywood, the two of you are all people can talk about.

[based on the request for oscars night. I had so much fun writing this!!!! genuinely, how Hugh didn't even get a nomination for Logan is a crime! I'm working on another request for Logan and I've got like dozens of drafts but I loved this and wanted to get it out, I hope you enjoy!]

The Oscars- Hollwood's most prestigious event. Neither Hugh, nor you were strangers to the hall. Hugh had not only been nominated but even hosted and you had been nominated and performed.

But this was new. Both of you had worked hard for your nominations. You and Hugh had been on opposite ends, he was the X-man, the Wolverine while you had been staring in Marvel movies since the very beginning, a friendly rivalry becoming of the two of you which came to fruition when you both stared in 'Deadpool and Wolverine.'

Now, the two of you were in the drama everyone had been talking about- mainly because it featured the hollywood couple. Hugh was nominated for best supporting actor while you had a nomination for best actress in a leading rule.

The camera's flashed as Hugh walked the carpet, alone. Everyone noted that fact. They'd assumed you would be on his arm but there was no sign of you.

He followed his agent as he led him to the row of interviewer's calling his name.

'First of all, I wanted to say congratulations on your nomination, your second nomination!' said the interviewer.

Hugh was all smiles, dapper in his sleek black suit and tie. 'Thank you, man, thank you.'

'So, what's going through your head at a time like this?'

'Honestly, not a lot. There's- there's almost too much to think about that I can't think of anything at all,' he chuckled.

'Are you proud of this movie?' he asked.

'I've never been prouder of a project before, and there's so many reasons why. Maybe that's obvious,' he grinned, thinking of one reason he was incredibly happy to be celebrating this movie. 'Not only does it touch on subjects that need to be touched on more, but we had an incredible direction, an amazing writing team and the rest of the cast.'

The interviewer gave him a knowing smile. 'By cast, are we-'

He didn't even have to finish before Hugh was closing his eyes and nodding. 'Oh yeah.'

Almost as if that was a cue, the yelling and flashing of the camera's intensified as many people turned to look.

'Oh, who's here?' asked Hugh, peaking over peoples heads until he saw. 'Oh.'

You stepped out the car like a star from old hollywood as you waved at the cameras and gave them your dazzling smile. You, like him, were dressed all in sleek black, looking effortlessly beautiful as you took to the carpet.

'There she is, the woman of the hour!' cheered the interviewer.

'Of every hour,' said Hugh, the microphone just picking it up. 'Pleasure to talk to you, man.' He hardly waited for a reply before he was making his way as casually as possible across the carpet to you.

You couldn't hear anything over the yelling, or see much over the flashing lights. All you could do is pose as your agent told you to and smile at the right direction.

You were led away but heard your voice be called from a corner. With a grin, you hurried over to Guillermo, the best part of Jimmy Kimmel shows. 'Hello handsome,' you winked, joining him quickly.

'Hello!' said Guillermo. 'Do you want a shot?'

You laugh. 'Do I want a shot- what? A shot of vodka?'

'We can do vodka,' he said, already prepping the shots.

'Let's do it, why not?'

Together, you take a shot and the camera focuses on you squinting and coughing. 'That was tequila.'

'Oh, sorry.'

'No, I loved it. I love you Guillermo!' you call as you slowly walk away.

Any other celebrity might have wondered why the crowd suddenly got louder, why camera's shifted. But they would've seen Hugh approach you in long strides, would've witnessed your grin as his arms wrapped around your back, careful not to ruin your dress.

They would have wondered what he was saying to you as he held your arms, soothing his thumb over the skin. They would've seen the simmer in your eyes and the way his arm slid around your waist effortlessly. You leant into him and the two of you posed for few pictures, offering them like rare jewels.

You and Hugh had never made it official, whatever it was between the two of you. But everyone knew what it was without words. There was only one word to describe the way Hugh looked at you. But you kept it private, he was some twenty years older and not long out of a marriage. Fans had watched you go from co-stars to friends to possibly (almost definitely) lovers. And they loved any crumbs you'd offer them.

The two of you did little interviews, only really stopping to talk to Amelia Dimoldenberg.

'Wait, the two of you are each other's dates?' she gasped.

'Amelia, I literally sent you an email asking to be my date,' you said. 'I didn't get a reply.'

Hugh stood back, looking between the two of you. 'You asked her, but I asked her first.'

Eventually, the two of you made it into the hall, sitting with the rest of your cast and crew for your movie. You all get situated, smiling and greeting any other friends.

Hugh and you were sat next to each other, something every camera in the room ate up. Since the rumours had started, you'd been all the people could talk about, and they'd be making stories of this for years. They snapped every shot of Hugh watching you talk, arm around the back of your chair, smiling and brushing parts of your hair away. Or how you'd reach out to brush his jacket or straighten his tie.

You couldn't keep your hands off each other.

Finally, the event started and the camera's were zoomed in on you and Hugh, which you didn't trust.

'Ladies and Gentlemen, Hollywood's greatest please welcome your host, Hollywood's worst... Ryan Reynolds!'

Everyone cheered but you and Hugh who's jaws dropped. People laughed at your reactions as you watched him walk out on stage, no less, in an 'I am a child of divorce.' and a picture of you and Hugh at the bottom.

Ryan waved at the two of you as everyone settled. You hid your face from laughing while Hugh was glaring playfully. 'Yeah! I know right! Who's Oscar did I have to shine to get my very own hosting gig! Wasn't yours Jackman, as you've never got one, you know?'

The crowd chuckled.

'And looks like you'll be getting one for, yep, let me check, contribution. Hey, win some you lose some, Wolvie.'

You were still chuckling loudly, the camera never leaving your reactions as the actors and crew laughed at you. So, you sat through Ryan's opening monologue as he spoke about each film individually, most with jokes, and most about how he nor Dogpool were nominated.

'Now, my good friends, well, what I like to call my parents, are both nominated for their movie. Yes, applause, please, they're very fragile,' said Ryan. 'Y/n plays a strong, confident woman who is only ever knocked down by Hugh's character and charm. But enough about what they get up to in the bedroom- this film-' Ryan halted, waiting for you and Hugh to stop playfully smirking at him and for the crowd to stop chuckling. He gave it a few serious words, before letting the rest of the ceremony play out.

You and Hugh were called out several times. When Halle Berry came out to present and gave Hugh a flirtatious wink that you gave back to her, blowing her a kiss.

When your friend Emma Stone tried to get you up to dance and you had to awkwardly shake your head.

Or when Hugh took to the stage, getting ready to take over hosting and you came up to drag him off as a joke.

When best supporting actor came up, they had last years best actress winner- Emma Stone- read out the names.

Hugh smiled and clapped when appropriate, but you seemed more nervous for him. A hand on his thigh, the other biting your nails. He was holding your leg, stopping your jerking knee.

'And the winner for best supporting actor, goes to... Hugh Jackman!'

The crowd erupted, but nobody as loud as you. You were on your feet before Hugh, arms thrown in the air as you cheer and clap.

Hugh's eyes, though he knew should be on the stage, fell to you as he pulled you in for a hug.

'I'm so proud of you!' you yell into his ear.

Hugh kissed your cheek, your temple, your hair, anything he can. Still hugging you, he reaches out behind you to shake hands with the director.

You pull away, kissing the back of his hand as he kisses your cheek again before rushing up to accept the award with a grin and a pep in his step.

He hugs Emma and offers her a polite kiss before taking to the microphone. 'Thank you! Thank you very much, everyone,' he says as they slowly stop clapping. They take their seats as he catches the director handing you tissues.

Hugh reaches into his pocket, taking out a piece of paper. 'I wrote this in 2013 but never got to use it, so excuse me if I just change the title of the film,' he joked as everyone chuckled. 'First, I want to thank the academy for this award. To the director, who had such an eye for art in this film, to the amazing writers for telling a story that needs to be told and should've been told a long time ago. It is because of your amazing work I am able to stand here and take only a fraction of the credit. To my agent, who thanks for getting me this job.

'To my children, I love you so much. I hope you think dad's a little cooler now. To my mum, whom I love and know is watching this at home. And to my dad, who I miss every day but I know... I know is here,' he choaks on the words as you watch, knowing you smudged your make up. Hugh turned to look at you and not the room, smiling through tears.

'And to you, my love, my reason for everything I do. You are the real heart of this movie, and you are my heart. My one and only. This is your award as much as mine. And I am yours. I love you so much, so, so much. I could stand up here and talk for hours about how much I love you, but I won't because I want to sit where you are and watch you win yours. I love you! Thank you!'

He holds up the award and blows you a kiss before walking off the side of stage.

You knew the camera was on you as you stood up again and cheered, a tear down your cheek.

Ryan walked back out on stage, this time, dressed in a cosplay of the iconic Wolverine suit. They all laughed. 'Gee, Hugh, thanks. I-I love you to.'

There was an award or two and a break before Hugh was rushing back to you all.

You leapt in his arms as he cradled you close, handing his oscar to the director. His hands roamed your back, fingers bruising the skin there as he kissed your shoulder and neck. 'God, I can't believe it, I am so proud of you, baby.'

Hugh pulled back, looking down at you. 'I love you. I love you so much.' he pecked your head. He wouldn't kiss you, you guys had a plan for the camera's to get that.

Not long after you'd taken your seats, the nominations for best actress in a leading roll were led out by Robert Downy jr.

Hugh held onto you tightly, tighter than you had him. It wouldn't feel right if he walked home with one when you, the real star, didn't. But you couldn't care, you were more than happy to sit with Hugh for the rest of the night, for the rest of your life.

'And the oscar, goes to...' Robert trailed off, opening the envelope and taking his time. He took in a deep breath. 'Oh, my lovely dear, get up here. Y/N!'

Just as they had for Hugh, everyone around you cheers. Your first instinct is to lean forward, holding your head in your hands and hiding as Hugh hugs you, pulling your body into his and yelling in glee. Finally, you pull back and hug the director, keeping a hold on Hugh's hand, you say things to the writers before turning and throwing an arm around Hugh's neck.

You're still gripping his hand as he helps you to the stage, you trembling so much you dare not go without support. He kisses your hand and hugs you once more before leaving you to walk up the stage. The cheers grow louder as you greet Robert.

The man was like your father, after staring in how many Marvel movies together. He hugged you tightly, smiling at you and bowing to present you with the oscar.

You approached the microphone, tears in your eyes as you did and everyone clapped. You waited until you could hear a pin drop until you took a deep breath. 'This is stressful as shit,' the people laugh. 'Oh my- thank you! Everyone! Thank you Robert! To all the other amazing, talented and intelligent nominees, I give a piece of this oscar to you all cause you were all amazing, truly!' you celebrate.

'Thank you to the director, to the writers, the cast, the crew. This story meant so much to me but more to all of you and you worked incredibly hard every day, your talent aspired me to work harder and thank you cause now I got one of these,' you show them the oscar, laughing. The crowd chuckle with you.

The camera cuts to Hugh, who watches you with stars in his eyes, reflecting in a pool of his tears.

'Oh god, who else. My agent, thank you. I appreciate it. Um, thanks to me I guess for being a good actress,' you shrug as the room laughs. 'I should probably thank Ryan or he'll force Hugh to do another Wolverine. Hugh,' you focus on him as the crowd chuckles. 'I am so in love with you. I didn't think a heart was capable of beating with so much love but it does- mine does- for you. All time. I love you more than words can describe, more than the whole sky. Thank you all! Thank you!'

Just as Hugh had, you head off to the stage, taking Roberts hand as he smiles and kisses your temple before leading you off.

Backstage, you and Hugh took to doing the interview together. They clapped as you appeared, hand in hand. Both of you looked dishevelled. Your hairs messy, Hugh's collar tugged and your dress crinkled at the end. Your lipstick was smudged too but you still managed some class. While Hugh looked like he'd been laid for the first time.

Still, you held onto each other with one hand and your oscars with the other.

'Hello!' greeted Hugh.

You giggled, hiding your face as Hugh coax's you to stand up, but laughs with you.

Many serious questions were asked as you and Hugh tried your best to pay attention.

'Y/N you looked great tonight, I just want to know what was the process of getting to look so good?' a man asked.

You chuckled, thinking about it as Hugh hid his grin, watching you. 'The process was... um... I took a shower, shaved just in case, you know, I got lucky tonight,' you nudged your hips with Hugh's smirking, 'I raided my friends wardrobe, found this old thing, it fit thank god. And um, yeah?'

Hugh barked a laugh as the crowd laughed at your antics, you having to bend over to laugh with him. Finally, he straightened up, wiping tears from his eyes. 'Sorry, what a night.'

'What a night,' you agreed. 'We've been celebrating so.'

The crowd again laugh, guessing just how the two of you have been celebrating.

As best you can, you answer a couple more questions before you were swooped away to take pictures, Hugh's arm falling lower and lower down your back until it was reasting above your ass.

Some reporter wolf whistled as you guys went and Hugh gripped you, bending his head to kiss you. It wasn't how you'd planned, but he needed to kiss you. Sure, your lips had been all around him less than ten minutes ago, but it wasn't enough, was never enough.

The two of you took your pictures with best actor and supporting actress. All four of you posing together, when it came to just you and Hugh, the two of you were laughing messes as you angled your oscars to kiss like a kid would with barbies.

Then, Hugh wrapped his fingers around the back of your neck and drew you in until he was kissing you, his lips moulding on yours, hand gripping you and camera's flashing.

The next day, Ryan was wearing a shirt of that iconic shot.

taglist (thank you!): @oatmilkriver, @angstdaddy, @chronicallybubbly, @white-wolf-buckaroo, @th3mrskory, @wolfyychan, @chaimshelii,

[uselesssomebody]

𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕠𝕕 𝕦𝕡 - post!d&w!logan howlett x reader

complete masterlist | logan howlett - coming soon!

words || 𝟚.𝟡𝕜

summary || in which the reader gets stood up, and logan consoles her - in more than one way

a/n || self indulgent :)) guess what happened to me guys !!

➵ i know i've been literally dead but i may be back! not sure fully yet lol but i've missed writing. shocker, college is in fact hard and i've spent a whileeee adjusting. that also means my writing is prob a bit shit here but i just wanted to get this out

➵ first time writing logan - i watched deadpool & wolverine and oh my godddd this man can fucking get it. haven't watched the x-men movies so i kinda had to guess his accent, sorry if it's inconsistent. this is set after the events of deadpool & wolverine

➵ shall i revamp the blog theme guys? i don't have any ideas but idk if you guys are bored by it haha

➵ send me requests if you have ‘em. enjoy!

warnings || fluff/smut/a wee bit of angst

➵ fingering

➵ age gap (not a plot point)

(tell me if i miss anything)

having 2 people in a one bedroom apartment was already cramped. 3 is insane. as much as wade tried, he felt bad for poor hugh's - *cough* logan's back for constantly swapping between the dingy couch and the mattress on the floor to sleep.

and the wolverine was never the type to ask for help, it pissed him off. they had been nearly atomized together for christ's sake!

another room on the floor had opened up, and as much as wade wanted to kick blind al off to that room instead, he knew the old lady wouldn't be able to pay the whole rent herself, and he had to make sure she didn't use too much fun-time sugar under fox's watchful eye. luckily, neither did logan have to live alone, as wade was quick to find a down-on-her-luck college girl who needed cheap rent.

so, now wade's stuck with an ornery old woman, and pretty-boy - well, man - logan got to have a cute girl as his roommate. just his luck. he checked in on his fellow invincible often, and as much as logan didn't talk, wade knew he didn't mind her one bit.

she tried to be a good roommate - cook breakfast for the both of them, pick up a sweet treat for him too if she was getting one for herself, and trying to keep to herself with the studying. but she couldn't help the little crush that she had on her roommate. like, come on.

older, mature, mysterious, downright yummy? what's a girl to do? she kept it to herself, but seeing him smirk or chuckle when she realizes she's accidentally been staring at him in that leather jacket or shirtless going to bed. at least she doesn't make him uncomfortable, but it feels pretty dismissive - how he sees her as such a fucking kid that he can't even take her attraction seriously.

logan took it very fucking seriously.

every day was a mental challenge - truly, god gives his worst temptations to his strongest soldiers. the liquor on his breath was still strong, not now because his life was ruined, but rather because his mind was.

this cute, young girl who looked at him like he was the solution to all her relationship issues, like his old-man body was good enough to fucking eat? it was a miracle that he hadn't taken her. and she just looked so beautiful as she got ready for bed, or as she bobbed her head to music while she studied, or as she buzzed around the small kitchen to cook her third cheap pasta for the week.

it didn't help how she'd always ask how he is, buy him little things to keep his mood up, and always offered to take the couch. he'd rather eat glass than let her sleep on the couch, but nonetheless, she offered every day.

fuck. it was impossible to sleep when she was just behind the wall, in her fucking shorts and tank. unbelievable. he needed a fucking drink.

some nights, he'll come home in the evenings to an empty house. it's rare - she doesn't have too much money to go out, but when she does, she'll usually warn him she'll be home late. he always makes sure to stay awake until she gets home, and even had the privilege of going into downtown to pick her up after the friends she was with had managed to lose her. she had hiccuped, tearing up in embarrassment as she watched him approach her drunk form leaning on a tree outside. she had thought the stern arch of his brow was because of her calling him so late, when really, he was just angry that her friends had the audacity to put her in such a dangerous situation.

"it's windy." he grunts, and she looks down at her short, strappy dress, ashamed.

"s-sorry. we drove here." she tries to explain, and logan relents, brow going from angry to grumpy.

"yeah." he finally sighs, walking with her back to their place. seeing her hands go to cradle her elbows, he places his leather jacket over her shoulders, and she swallows thickly.

"you don't have to-" but he's lighting a cigar as she speaks, in just his wifebeater he'd been lounging in. she decides to shut up, silent until they reach the house.

he helps her in and then waits outside to finish the cigar, and after she gets in, she sighs softly, carefully placing the jacket down. she starts trying to make logan some dinner as a thank-you, but passes out at the dinner table half-way through. luckily, she hadn't had the stove on, and logan's heart melts as he sees her, halfway through mixing a few eggs, head lolling off the chair as she drools a little.

cutie, he thinks, separating her fingers from the fork and bowl, and carrying her into the bed. as he tries to set her down, her fingers clutch his arm, and a small, sleepy whine leaves her.

logan's not a man to blush, but hearing that little beg for him to stay makes him fucking burn. he looks down at her, a hand running through his hair, and he gently tries to let her down again. she just holds on tighter, groaning, "warm..." a little mumble escapes her, and logan huffs. of course it's not that she wants him, she's just cold. he sighs, sitting down and letting her cuddle into his arm.

he had planned to leave once she'd passed out, but it was late, and he was old, so he had ended up just sleeping next to her anyways. the sun's rays the next morning pierce his eyes, and he sighs softly, waking up next to her. he swallows thickly, watching the way the sun hits her form, bathing her exposed skin in orange and amber.

the moment is broken by her startling awake. for a moment, she sighs happily, thinking that this was just a continuation of her dream about logan, where she wakes up next to him after a night of great sex, and they both live happily ever after. then she blinks.

his bicep feels bigger than in the dream, his face looks a little more real, he's- real?!

she squeaks, immediately sitting up.

"logan?"

"don't go getting any ideas in your head." he immediately defends, sighing. "you called me last night."

she bites her lip.

"you took me home?"

"put you in bed too. then ya fucking kept me on ya like a boa." he's joking, but she still struggles to tell between his grumpy voice and his joking grumpy voice.

"fuck, i'm really sorry, must have ruined your night-" she starts, and he gets up, ruffling her hair.

"it's okay. better knowing you were safe." it leaves her a little star struck, especially when he then goes to continue making the omelette she had tried to make last night.

he's cooking for her for once and she gets such a nice view of his broad back in that wife-beater. maybe things aren't that bad.

knowing how she always texts if she's out late, he's a bit confused to come home to an empty room. he huffs, trying not to panic, but he can't help how much he care for the girl. he leans back, lounging on the couch.

as an hour passes with no texts, he's about to get up and ... do something. look for her, call her - something.

just then, she walks through the door, purse dropping on the floor with a thud.

that's an attitude he hadn't seen before. she looks like a deer in headlights when she notices that he is in fact home.

"o-oh." she blinks, quickly picking up the purse, as if to console it. "wade said you weren't home." logan raises a brow, a little curious why the other man would say that.

"long day?" he finally comments, and she breathes out.

"shit day." she corrects. logan's brow furrows.

"hmm." he murmurs, stretching his arm out over the back of the couch. an open invitation. she hesitates but... he looks warm.

conservatively, she sits beside him, hands in her lap. she's not even paying attention to whatever channel logan has on as background noise.

theres maybe 5 solid minutes of silence.

finally, she sighs.

"i'm gonna go to bed." she murmurs softly, getting up. logan wraps his fingers around her palm.

"talk to me." he mumbles gruffly, and she knows that's a pretty big first step for him. she bites her lip, sitting back down, and takes a deep breath.

"got stood up." it's little more than a whisper, and she feels a pout forming on her lips, which she tries to reverse, to little avail. it's silent again, and she wonders if logan heard her.

of course, he did - spending a moment processing who the hell would stand her up.

"i'm sorry." his rough fingers press over hers, comforting, and she can't help but sink more into him than the couch cushions.

it feels nice, more right than the kisses she'd shared with the guy she'd been seeing.

"whatever." she tries to mumble, trying not to show her hurt.

"he's an idiot." his hand slips around her shoulders, and he can feel her pulse quicken.

"i'm an idiot."

"he's an idiot." he repeats sternly. "who was he?" she bites her lip.

"some... guy." logan suppresses a scoffing bark.

"not if he's got you like this." he looks down at her. she's ashamed to look up at him.

"i don't know... i just really liked him. i thought he liked me too." she feels a tear slip out, and logan's fist squeezes in anger as he sees her quickly wipe it away.

"he should be singin' his prayers that he even got your attention." that makes her giggle - strained, but there. he prefers the sound to her defeated mumbles. "look at me." he murmurs, taking her chin and angling it to face him. his eyes travel down to the cute dress she'd put on for her date - low cut, perfectly form fitting, "he's a fucking idiot." he whispers, hand slipping down to her waist.

"yeah?" she whispers, significantly less focused on aforementioned 'fucking idiot' now.

"yeah, princess." he murmurs, hand gently running up and down her side. he knows he shouldn't, but he can practically feel the jump of her heart at the endearment. "you like that? princess?" his voice almost has a teasing lilt, and her lids flutter at the difference in tension from 2 minutes ago.

"a little." her face looks so bashful, so unsure. after that depressing feeling of not being wanted - god, he wants to pull her out of that so bad.

"should be treated like a princess." she shifts imperceptibly closer.

"got a guy who'll do that for me?" she teases, and logan scoffs softly.

"you know i do." his voice carries that gruffness even with how quiet he is, speaking into the small space between their lips. "you know, princess."

she breathes out shakily, leaning forward, when logan pulls her chin, pressing his lips to hers. she whimpers softly, finding her hands and placing them at his nape, not wanting to let go. it's not rough, but needy, his other hand slipping to the hem of her dress on her thigh. she hums into his lips, as he pulls away, a little breathless.

"don't - we shouldn't." he whispers, and a pout graces her lips - a proper one.

"why?"

"yer upset." he sighs, but doesn't move away.

"about?" she says playfully, having fully forgotten about her evening; she'd been waiting for this for so long. he lets out a gruff bark of a laugh, pulling her closer, and she adjusts, getting on his lap.

"come on, bub." he scolds again, and she hums, leaning down to kiss him.

"please?" she whispers, against his lips. he groans.

"jesus, what're y'doin' to me?" his head tilts back, and she giggles, exhilarated that she's got him like this. her hands trail down his arms - god, his arms - tracing the veins, somehow always bulging, as she gently leans forward again, kissing him. this time, theres a bit more tongue, and he pulls her closer roughly, gnashing their teeth together. she moans softly into his mouth, fingers finding his rough palm. he grips them tight - not enough to hurt, but just enough to show that he's holding back.

"i'm not made of glass." she teases, and he scoffs softly.

"i could snap ya'n half." his mumble finds his way back into her lips, and she has to control herself to not showhow much the little quip affected her.

"maybe i want you to."

"jesus." he flips her over, onto her back, "got this pretty little dress on, fuck, that guy's an idiot." his hands travel down her thighs, and she bites her lip, a massive grin on her face.

"you like it?" she murmurs softly, playing with the strap of her dress.

"whadya think?" he huffs, and she giggles.

"and if i told you i got it for you?" logan presses a hot kiss to the side of her thigh.

"i'd tell ya to get a dozen more." his lips move up her thigh slowly, and she lets out a shaky breath.

"god, logan." her whispers of his name are like music to his ear, and he leaves a small bite by the hem of her dress.

"gotta tell me if i hurt you." he mutters, more seriously, and she smiles.

"only fun if it hurts."

"i'm serious, princess." she relents.

"i'll tell you." he sighs in content, gently riding her dress off.

"this okay?"

"more than okay." she helps him, pulling the dress over her hips, her lacy panties peeking under the fabric. when he spends just a bit too long staring, she giggles, "you can touch." she affirms, and he barks out a gruff lap.

"could'a guessed that much." his fingers trace the hem of them, travelling down her inner thighs. her breath hitches, and she gently rolls her hips, desperate for more.

"please, logan." she whispers, breathing a bit labored. though he'd love to tease, he's getting desperate too.

"gotta tell me what ya want, princess." he murmurs, and she bites her lip, almost shy again. it's cute.

"touch me?" she murmurs, almost like it's a favor she's asking. he kisses her thigh again, before gently peeling the panties off. he lets out a soft groan at how slick she is, fingers catching her arousal as they travel down her slit. she lets out a shocked gasp - practically a moan - and he fucking loves it.

`'need them, princess?" he smirks at her, and she nods, almost pathetically.

"god, i do." he obliges, gently prodding her entrance with his middle finger. he slips in with little resistance, but jesus, he can feel how tight she is.

"fuck, yer gonna be the death of me, princess." he groans softly, and she lets out a breathy giggle.

"thought that doesn't happen to you?"

"well, never had a girl as pretty as you." he murmurs, slipping another finger in. she flushes, back arching as his fingers do, body warm as she rocks her hips in time with his ministrations.

"faster?" she begs softly, and he could never say no to those big doe eyes. he starts moving faster, her slick absolutely coating his fingers, and she moans louder, hips moving in a more stuttered rhythm.

"like that?" that teasing lilt is in his voice, and she nods furiously.

"j-just like that-" she stammers, mind already foggy, "god, i'm close, please don't stop."

"not in a million years, princess." she lets out a loud moan as she can feel herself unraveling, the orgasm so powerful that her thighs shake around him as she cums. she pants as he helps her ride through it.

"good girl, just like that, princess," he consoles, "so fuckin' pretty for me, ain't cha?" he grins, as she starts to come down. as her breathing slows, so too do his fingers, before slowly sliding them out of her. he gently rubs her clit, just to see her jolt at the stimulation, before chuckling, and placing his soaked fingers onto his tongue.

she lets out another moan as she watches him, with lidded eyes.

"i'll cum again." she warns, playfully, and he's gleeful. she tastes like fruit.

"i plan on it, princess." she feels her cheeks warm.

"that's the hardest i've cum in a while." she admits shyly.

"sounded like it." he teases, but before they can get anything else out, there's banging on the wall that connected them to wade and blind al.

"these walls are paper thin!" al's screech sounds a little traumatized, and her scolding make both her and logan whip around, embarrassed.

"for once in my life, i agree with her! shut up, lovebirds, i wanna fucking sleep!" wade's voice is equally exasperated.

there's silence, until she calls back a bashful, "sorry!" she turns to logan, almost laughing, but still flushed with shame. "maybe we should stop. he scoffs.

"nah, just means i gotta teach ya to be quiet."

safe to say, she's not thinking at all about her date tonight.

[cryptidnamedhabit]

So since im kinda autistic about the new wolverine and deadpool movie im just gonna post some poolverine/deadclaws headcanons to help keep myself sane :]

Deadpool and Wolverine spoilers under the cut

Also Logan is autistic because I said so

Wade will drink whatever in his coffee in the morning, he doesn't care, meanwhile logan needs a ridiculous amount of things in his morning coffee for it to be drinkable to him

Logan is too much of a wuss puss to admit it though and just didn't drink coffee for a long time

Then, one day, out of the blue, Wade came home with two coffees, one for himself and one for logan (and a puppicino for mary puppins ofc)

Logan refused at first and only agreed to try it to get Wade to stop whining

Needless to say, he was genuinely surprised (and ever-so-slightly creeped out) that Wade knew what he liked in his coffee without telling him

"Apparently, oldie wolvie liked his coffee like that." Wade told him

Wade might've fallen first, but logan fell harder

He was HARD on the denial train

At first he didn't know why or what he was feeling whenever he was around Wade

Feeling jealous whenever Wade gives his attention to someone else? Just annoyed that the other person doesn't express the same "disgust" he has for Wade

Feeling mad when someone finally expresses their "disgust" towards deadpool? That's just because he wasn't that annoying that day and didn't deserve mean (but true) things said about him

Just woke up screaming from a nightmare and needs to hug Wade to feel grounded again because the time ripper killed him in his dreams? He just allows it because mary puppins wasn't quick enough to do it

The feeling of butterflies in his stomach whenever Wade looks at him with nothing but adoration and love in his eyes? Probably just something off in the food he ate earlier that day

Feeling the urge to grab Wade by his face and kiss him while whispering sweet nothings until the universe explodes? Just an intrusive thought or two

It isn't until he's on some random walk with mary puppins that he finally realizes that he just might have a crush on deadpool

He pretty much goes through the seven stages of grief once he realizes

It became more difficult to shove his feelings down his throat whenever he was around Wade after that

It wasn't until another one of their "family game nights" that Negasonic pulled Logan aside to talk to him

"When will you two just make it official already?" "What the hell are you talking about?" "About you and Wade, that's what. You don't seriously think that nobody in this building can see you two clearly have a thing for each other, right?" "Still don't know what you're talking about" "What are you on right now?" "The autism spectrum."

Negasonic gave up trying to talk to Logan about Wade after that

After all of that was said and done, it wouldn’t be until one of Wade's random teasings that finally made Logan snap

"God peanut, you wanna kiss me sooo bad it makes you look stupid~"

That was it.

Logan closed the distance between himself and Wade, grabbed his face, and kissed him passionately before he pulled away

"Hhholy fucking hell peanut, how long were you saving that for?" "You've got no idea bub"

"Does this mean I can finally use the blowjob handles on your mask?"

Meanwhile Althea shouts "I CAN HEAR YOU MOTHERFUCKERS CLEAR AS DAY!"

Anyway, I think I might make a part 2 to this post, but idk

[prettypumpum]

Title: Crossed Dimensions I Logan Howlett x Reader

Summary: You were living an ordinary life until the day a portal throws you into the Marvel universe. Trapped between an unbearable Deadpool and a Wolverine as troubling as he is charming, you discover powers you didn't know you had and an unknown past with certain heroes. As your anxiety grows in the face of this new reality, will you be able to find your place and perhaps become the hero they need?

Warnings: strong language, mentions of violence,

Word count: 1,031

"I'll be back on Monday! No funny business, no parties, and the pizza money is in the drawer by the hallway!" Wade shouted, slamming the car door before walking away.

"Finally," Logan muttered, his gaze still fixed on the windshield, his face impassive.

I glanced at Laura in the rearview mirror. Even if he'd never admit it, Logan enjoyed Wade and his antics in his own way.

"So, how’s it going at the Institute?" I asked Laura, hoping to break the heavy silence.

“It’s fine,” she replied, stopping at a red light, her eyes glued to the road.

Logan eventually broke the silence, almost reluctantly. “It’s a good place. They can help you settle in.”

“You guys are welcome too,” she retorted as the light turned green. “They could help you with your powers. Besides, they’re short-staffed. They could use someone to handle a bunch of teens… especially teens with superpowers,” she added, casting a pointed look at Logan.

He clenched his jaw. “That’s all behind me.”

In the rearview mirror, I saw Laura’s face fall slightly, as if she regretted bringing it up. A bitter silence settled, heavy with memories. I knew that as soon as we got dropped off, Logan would probably head straight to a bar to forget.

“How about we order a pizza?” I suggested to the two mutants in the front, hoping to lighten the mood.

They glanced back at me in the mirror, a fleeting smile on their faces.

A few hours later, we were all sprawled out on the couch, surrounded by pizza boxes scattered on the coffee table.

“Comedy or horror?” Laura asked, the remote in one hand and a slice of pineapple pizza in the other.

“Put on whatever you want,” Logan replied, cracking open another beer.

She looked at me for my opinion, and I just shrugged with a smile, content with the relaxed vibe. She scrolled through the options on the screen. Beside me, Logan was relaxed, his dark eyes fixed on the TV. The white T-shirt he was wearing suited him surprisingly well, and I could feel his arm brushing against mine, an innocent but electrifying touch.

With each quick glance at him, memories of the bar came back to me, and I found myself imagining what might have happened if Wade hadn’t interrupted us. These thoughts wrapped me in a warm haze.

Finally, Laura settled on a horror movie. *Scream*, a classic, perfect for a pizza night. But I was having a hard time focusing. My attention kept drifting back to Logan, sitting so close.

“These kids are so stupid,” Logan muttered, taking a swig of his beer.

“That’s what everyone says watching horror movies, but I’m not sure teenage me would’ve done any better,” I replied, grabbing another slice of pizza. “Between rehearsals and dance classes, I barely had time to sleep. Killing someone… well, that was even less likely.”

He smirked. “That explains so much.”

"Right? So, tell us about teenage you in Canada, back when there was no electricity or running water," I teased with a playful smile.

Laura was watching us, a smile on her face, finding our exchange more interesting than the movie. Logan and I exchanged a few knowing smiles before she stood up.

“I’m gonna grab a soda,” she said, slipping into the kitchen and leaving us alone in this intimate moment.

"She’s great," I said, watching the door she had just disappeared through.

“Yeah,” he replied, his face hardening, his thoughts clearly elsewhere.

“Hey,” I said, placing my hand on his, reminding him of our promise from the bar.

He looked up at me, surprised. “I’m okay,” he murmured. “But… sometimes, it all just gets to be too much.”

I nodded, feeling the depth of his unease.

“I know.” My thumb brushed his hand softly. His gaze, dark and intense, held secrets he dared not share.

I looked up, and our eyes met. His usually guarded stare softened, revealing fatigue and invisible scars. He broke the silence, his voice low:

“It’s rare… to feel this good.”

He squeezed my hand gently, as if to reassure himself that this moment was real.

Our gazes locked, the silence between us loaded with unspoken emotions. I felt almost trembling under his look. Logan, usually so distant, was looking at me differently, with a glimmer I’d never noticed before.

“Hey,” Laura said, coming back from the kitchen and breaking the spell between Logan and me. “Sorry, but I have to go,” she announced, holding up her phone.

“Everything okay?” Logan asked, his face concerned.

“Yeah, I totally forgot my friend Taylor was supposed to help me with my shopping.”

Logan nodded with a murmur, but his skepticism was clear. “Take some pizza with you; there’s too much for the two of us,” I said, quickly getting up to pack some for her.

“Thanks,” she said, grabbing the boxes. “Tonight was fun… we should do it again sometime.” I nodded, smiling, holding the door open for her as she struggled with the boxes. “See you soon.”

Logan and I, now alone, stood there, our eyes fixed on the closed door for a moment. “That was a lie, right?” Logan asked.

“You never lied to go see your crush?” I shot back with a mischievous smile.

“So, you were one of those bad girls who lied to mess with boys?” he replied, his intense gaze locked onto mine.

My breathing quickened, my body warming. My breath was short; I wanted nothing more than to throw myself at him and kiss him.

“I… I need to go to the laundry room,” I said, unable to hold his gaze any longer, using the excuse of a basket of dirty laundry left out.

He nodded, seeming to collect himself, and watched me pick up the basket as I fled. “I’ll take a shower,” he said as I darted out of the apartment.

When I got to the hallway, I realized I’d forgotten the detergent in my hurry. Returning to the apartment, I walked straight into Logan, shirtless, coming out of the bathroom.

“Sorry… I forgot the…” I was unable to look away from his hairy chest and toned muscles.

[a-fluffer-nutter]

Rapscallion

A/N - Day one of August's Tickletober! Anticipation is today's prompt, so here is a Deadpool and Wolverine fic! Please enjoy.

Word Count: 975

     “My dearest fanfic readers, you have absolutely no idea how horny I am right now,” Wade let out an exaggerated moan as he stared deeply into Logan’s fiery eyes. Fiery was an understatement, the literal pits of hell could be seen if you looked into his pupils long enough. 

      “I have no fucking clue on why you keep talking to ‘the readers,’ but it's starting to piss me off,” Logan snarled, his to the running across his top row of teeth. 

       “Oh, you are such a tease, Peanut! Speaking of bits, mine has an itch that needs to be juiced.”

      “You are one of the most revolting people I have ever met,” Logan's center claws slipped out from between his joints, lowering just enough for Wade’s wrists to feel pinpricks of anticipation. “What I wouldn't do to tear your bottom jaw off your disgusting face so you could never speak again.”

         “Admit it, sweetheart,” Wade cooed, ready to recoil the second his statement was finished, “You'd miss the blowies way too much.”

        As Wade turned his head away, burying his face in his shoulder, he waited for his wrists to be sliced like a fish filet. However, this didn't happen. Uncomfortably shifting underneath Logan's weight, wrists still trapped above his head. 

       It was a super-secret mission that they were on, Wade had told Logan. Knowing Wade, Logan presumed that this mission was to spy on the Avengers or some shit, especially as Wade kept humming this one “heroic” song that he had told Logan was “really fucking cool in 2012.” While there were no sightings of Thor or Hawkeye, the two, in traditional superhero fashion, did manage to stop some sort of evil entity that wanted to take over Philadelphia. Aside from the Liberty Bell now having a new crack, Wade's fault naturally, the day was saved and our heroes needed a place to crash. Despite saving the day and all, they were a bit short on pocket money, so a grungy Motel 6 was their destination. Logan stayed in to watch TV, which based on the size and shape of it, was miraculously showing films in color, while Wade went hunting for the perfect Philly Cheesesteak. This temporary separation worked exceptionally well until Wade returned and spoiled the end of the film Logan was watching. 

       “It's not my fault your universe was still waiting for Incredibles 2! I thought you'd seen it!”

       “Why would I be watching it if I hadn't seen it yet?”

        “Maybe it's your favorite movie, I don't know. You seem like the kinda guy that would prefer more manly movies like Top Gun, Bridesmaids, or Velocipastor, but who am I to judge?”

      Naturally, Wade continued to push his luck and Logan's buttons, which lead them to our current situation. Logan pinning Wade on the bed, his wrists trapped between two of Logan's claws and Logan's entire weight on top of him. 

       Squirming as if he was wearing “grandma's surprise Christmas sweater,” Wade now looked back up at Logan, muscles tensing in the slightest. 

      “So, are you gonna do the stabby thing? Spaw my blood everywhere like a Quintin Tarantino film?”

      “I'm not sure yet.”

      “Ah, I see,” Wade clicked his tongue. “Well, we don't have to do the whole slicing me up like a sandwich thing. While this joint certainly isn't a Four Seasons, we don't need to Rudy Giuliani it all and spread mysterious liquids everywhere. Wait, who is the president in your universe?”

        “Matthew Perry?”

        “Ah, shit. Those kids from Smosh are psychic!” Logan let out a grumble, reminding Wade of his current predicament. “Shit, um, what should you do to me? Bondage? Sing songs of the French Revolution? Whisper sweet nothings in my ear? Hold me closer, tiny da-ack!” Wade was cut off by his own vocal tic. Logan released one of Wade's arms and when Logan repositioned his own, he accidentally grazed Wade's side. “What the shit, man? You didn't tell me I was gonna need to point out where the scary man touched me on a doll to my therapist this week!”

       “What the fuck was that noise, bub?” Logan mused; one eyebrow cocked upward. Making a humming sound, Logan moved his hand back to Wade's side and squeezed. Once again, Wade made a strangled yelp. 

       “Okay, maybe we can get back to the stabbing and bleeding part again,” a wave of nervousness washed over Wade's words. 

       “Of course, why wouldn't you be ticklish too?” Logan said mostly to himself, and he continued to poke and prod Wade's side, slowly walking his fingers up to the lower rib cage. 

       “Marvel Jesus does not condone this level of violence!” The last two words were an octave higher as Logan decided that was the moment to stop holding back and quickly skitter his fingernails across the sides of his ribs. “Shit! Peanut!”

       Logan continued his assault silently, trying not to smile as Wade writhed beneath him. Shouting out obscenities and references that went over Logan's head, Wade's laugh became increasingly hysterical and frantic as Logan's fingers journeyed upward. 

        “This is communist propaganda! A war crime! Don't you understand the Geneva Convention? You heathen. You rapscallion. A scoundrel. A hippocampus! A flou-!” Wade's words vanished from his tongue, replaced with loud cackles and hiccups. 

       “Damn shame this is the only way to shut you the fuck up, bub,” Logan broke his silence, his amusement of the situation now apparent by the upturned curl of his lips. He was thankful that Wade's eyes were as shut as they could be, Wade seeing this little bit of joy could be a catalyst to something bigger than Logan wanted to deal with any time soon. 

       What Logan didn't know was that Wade was already plotting his revenge. Something so devious, cruel, and sexy, that the world was not prepared for it. 

[interabangs]

DP&W Review

I can't believe I actually love Deadpool and Wolverine! I had pretty much moved on from MCU after Endgame. Haven't watched a post EG movie other than Shang-Chi, which is a good movie. Other than that, I had mostly lost interest.

DP&W is a perfectly imperfect movie that finally got me to care about the characters again and shockingly, root for them! Do I have a new MCU ship? What is happening!

Spoilers:

While I thought DP1 was a solid origin story and vastly superior take on Wade than Origins, I left DP1 feeling like... it's a good movie, it's objectively better than DP&W, but I couldn't connect with DP1. I wanted to like it but I think I overhyped it. I might like it more on re-watch but it's, just fine. In DP&W, Wade became so relatable, and I found his catharsis uncompromisingly sincere. Props to Ryan for keeping the mask on for so long and emoting without making it look too OTT. He does a great job riding that line between endearing, audacious, and menacing. He IS Deadpool.

I had liked Wolverine in the X-Men movies, I even liked the Origins Wolverine movie, but I wasn't invested in him as a character until this movie! Sure, Worst Best Wolverine could have had a more 'show not tell' backstory but I think it was handled that way to avoid making him look irredeemable to the audience. Hugh knocked it out of the park, he IS Wolverine and his acting was top tier. I felt like his presence was perfect to balance out Deadpool's random hilarity, and Hugh brought some much needed groundedness to the narrative. This movie really hinged on the chemistry between D&W and it's out of this world omg

I love that the movie gave no fucks about looking 'too cheesy' in the climax, it just did the Power of Friendship handhold Madonna ab shot, and it was exquisite. The movie revels in being a comic book come to life, and even though I didn't read superhero comics, I felt like a kid again, just enjoying the moment and not worrying about this or that. It was beautiful in its simplicity. I love that Wade's importance was affirmed while Logan's legacy was honored and the movie said, "It's okay to care about these characters! We care about them too." I felt immersed, I felt like the characters matter, that this story and all the Fox Marvel movies, good and bad, mean something. I teared up at the credits tribute, it was so sweet.

DP&W is about a 8/10 objectively, there are problems but I don't care. The movie FEELS like a 10/10 to me and is now in my top 5 MCU movies. Like I'm still in disbelief at how entertained, engaged, and happy I was from start to finish. This was exactly what I didn't know I wanted. I ended up watching DP&W in theaters 3 times and had a blast in every viewing. I can't wait for this to come out on Disney+ and for deleted scenes/extras! Maybe I really am just a simple bitch lol

This is such a fun movie with heart, absolutely love it ❤️💛

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Hiya! It's me again, ya horn boi, that is just THIRSTY for your writing 😫🙏

I was wondering- when you're able and if this one shot idea interests you (don't write it if it doesn't, this is just my sick little mind needing some fuel because AO3 is down and I'm starting to tweak).

But I was wondering if you could do a little one shot set in the Deadpool x Wolverine au? Specifically Adam using his claws on Lucifer? (It doesn't have fo be stabbing or making him bleed if you're not into that, mainly just cutting his clothes off-)

They definitely start flatting together after the film, so I like to think that this takes place at the flat and Adams been drinking cause he's still depressed (if you've seen the film he has a perfectly good reason for this), so he basically spills his feelings to Lucifer, who then takes him to bed to sleep the alcohol off. The dirty stuff happens in the morning when Adam feel super embarrassed but Lucifer tell him he feels the same.

After been hated in his own universe, Adam just baths in Lucifers praises and touches.

They get a little rough but what do you expect from two immortals that have a pain kink-

So, that's basically it, just some soft love for Adam with a lot of filth mixed in.

I just need more beefy Adam with Logans cute hair ears- if Lucifer makes a comment on them I'll buy you a car for your 21st birthday-

Anyway- thank you! 🍳

I'VE FINALLY SEEN THE MOVIE!! I was waiting to do this one when I saw the movie and now I have.

Even though they had saved their world and everyone in it, Adam couldn't fight off the depression that still clawed it's way into his mind when the dust was settled and everything was over.

He was living with Lucifer now, really he had nowhere else to go he didn't know why he even bothered trying. It was still weird to him that the Adam of this world that died was the anchor being keeping it all together.

Adam wasn't that important, he could live in any timeline apparently.

Adam raised the bottle of whiskey to his lips and took a deep drink, he enjoyed the way it burned going down his throat. He wasn't sure now just how long he's been drinking but it's been enough to get a good buzz on.

Lucifer: Hey there- Woah, what's with the self inflicted pity party?

It was easy to see that Adam was drunk, that bottle was new but more than half gone already.

Fuck, that wasn't good.

Lucifer: Come on baby girl time for bed before we find out if you actually can drink yourself to death.

Lucifer gently reaches down and removes the bottle from Adams grip and sets it down before picking him up like he weighed nothing. Because to Lucifer he really didn't.

Adam held onto him and buried his face in Lucifer's neck.

Adam: You smell good.

Lucifer: Thank you it's called soap.

Adam: I ever tell you how much I love you?

Lucifer grinned: No, but why don't you tell me now?

Adam: I love you so much, but you've never loved me.

Lucifer was confused until he remembered the version of himself from this Adams world. So they had history there too....

Lucifer: I love you too.

Adam: You do?

Adams claws came out making Lucifer jump.

Lucifer: Woah! Watch the murder mittens cute stuff.

Adam giggled and that's how Luicfer knew he was fucking wasted. Adam never giggled especially over a silly joke he makes.

Lucifer laid him on the bed but Adam pulled him down and held him while he slept off his drunken stupor.

Lucifer: There are worse places to be than in between these perfect titties.

In the morning woke up to being held by Luicfer, his face got warm and he tried to get away.

Lucifer: What no morning kiss?

Adam groaned: Oh fuck me....

Lucifer: Well if you really want to.

He laughed nervously when Adam unsheathed one set of claws and it looked like he was going to stab him in the dick, but instead he used them to cut off his clothes.

Lucifer: Well this is a pleasant surprise.

Adam: I can change my mind.

Lucifer: Nope! Come here beautiful.~

The sex they had was a mixture of hard core rough sex and making love. Adam melted under his touch and soaked in all the praises that Lucifer showered him with as he pounded into him. The headboard was banging the wall like it was Morse code.

It could be heard throughout the apartment, good thing Charlie was out for coffee.

When they were done they laid there basking in the afterglow of their euphoric blissful state.

Luicfer: Addie.

Adam felt his eye twitch at the nickname: What?

Lucifer: You're my favorite person.

Adams face got hot again: Shut up.....

[tobiasdrake]

We go from the best fight in the X-Men filmography thus far straight to Charles Xavier sitting in a room, looking into the camera and explaining the plot. Okay guys. XD

One of the main jobs this film has is to bridge First Class, which became more or less a reboot, with the original trilogy. So they can go in new directions and do different things with the characters without outright saying, "The original movies up through Origins: Wolverine aren't canon anymore, sorry."

Days of Future Past is what's commonly referred to as a soft reboot, where continuity gets to start over from scratch but with an explanation offered in-universe that connects it to the previous continuity.

Time travel and multiverse shenanigans are often the go-to for carrying out soft reboots. The Chris Pine Star Trek films, for instance, take place in an alternate timeline created when Spock and a bad guy traveled back in time and messed up the series canon.

The Marvel multiverse is basically designed to allow Marvel writers to make continuity-free re-imaginings of the Marvel universe and then go "That one is Universe 42069, it has its own canon somewhere out there in the multiverse unrelated to the mainline comics."

DOFP intends to do that for the Foxverse, liberating the cast of the newer X-films from the shackles of the old canon and letting them spin out in a new direction.

But before we can do that, Charlie Boy needs to explain the plot that will get us there.

Magneto chimes in to explain Mystique's powers, like Bobby and Kitty don't already know her. XD

Actually, come to think of it, Kitty only formally became one of the X-Men in Last Stand, the movie that took Mystique's powers away. And Bobby wasn't really an X-Men X-Man until that same movie, despite being present for the whole trilogy. They actually might not know who Mystique is.

Huh. Objection retracted.

Then again, Colossus recognizes her. And he was no more involved in X-Men Stuff than Kitty was.

Xavier goes on to assert that he, too, has watched First Class and thought it was pretty sweet. Don't let the face of Patrick Stewart fool you; Despite this personal history having never come up in the original trilogy, it is still an important part of the two characters' relationships with one another.

As an artistic note, I love how she shapeshifts into a human form when he says, "I knew her as Raven." A subtle call-out to their conflict from First Class - or, at least, what it was supposed to be in First Class even though the film doesn't convey it well.

We're told, in the film, that Xavier never appreciated her natural mutant self and preferred that she try to pass as human. They kinda botched their attempts to show it, but it was the clear intent. In a subtle reference to it here, when Magneto talks about her we see her in her true form, but when Xavier reminisces on how fondly he remembers her, she shifts into her human guise.

These two men both fondly remember Mystique, but they have very different memories of who she was.

(Where is she, anyway? Did the Sentinels get her? Is she still mutant-cured?)

Yeah, Xavier's good at that. Remember that time he was losing a tense negotiation with Magneto and Jean so he just started throwing punches, basically forfeiting the argument and pushing Jean into Magneto's arms as hard as humanly possible? Not so different from what happened with Mystique when you think about it.

Xavier offers a sanctuary for mutants on the run from the dangers of the world, and that's great. But his powers of persuasion leave much to be desired.

Logan gets all sad and grimly reports that Mystique killed again after that. Bit of a weird moment. Like, it's performed as if he's referencing the death of another character that was important to him. Something we would instantly recognize and be like, "Oh, fuck, my heartstrings."

I have no idea who that might be, though. He didn't even know her in her youth to be sad about who she became. One time she beat him up and then he stabbed her, and then another time she tried to trick him into having sex with her under false pretenses. That is the entire extent of their relationship.

Why are you so sad about Mystique killing people, Logan? Who did she ever kill that could be haunting you like this? Don't you have enough ghosts already? Do you really need to borrow Charlie's?

The Sentinels are using Mystique's powers to acquire Sunspot's heat powers and Colossus's steel plating and Iceman's cryokinesis.

Meanwhile, poor Mystique can't do any of that. It sucks when people steal your powers and then get whole new abilities you didn't possess out of them.

You know, you'd think in the decades she was hanging out with Magneto, the two of them would have done something about this. Did the fact that humans captured her and performed invasive experiments to steal her powers just... slip Mystique's mind?

"Less than 50 years." My dude, that is a long-ass time to be working on one project. XD These things were in production hell for half a century.

Xavier's like, "When Mystique killed Trask, it convinced the world that they needed his program. And then the humans stayed mad about it for FIFTY YEARS."

FIFTY YEARS. Two generations later, it was still just Trask that they were mad about. Nothing else that happened in that time, nothing in the entire original X-Men trilogy, ever moved the needle one way or the other. It was always about Trask. They were very slowly building the Sentinels the entire time and nothing else mattered.

Senator Kelly's entire anti-mutant career was pointless because humanity already had made up its mind to kill mutants with Sentinels. Trask is the one and only bullet point of history that matters. XD

I understand why this is so janky. Stopping the assassination of Trask is meant to be the emotional goal of the film. We have to stop Mystique from becoming a murderer, because that sets her down the road to being evil.

But "We have to stop her from killing the man making Genocide Machines" wouldn't be a compelling narrative on its own. Because. Like. Fuck that guy. Mystique did nothing wrong.

So the assassination also needs to be the apocalyptic cornerstone around which the fate of the universe revolves. Killing Trask has to directly cause the creation of the Sentinels, but the film also wants to be set in the 70's and has to account for the fact that none of this was a thing in the original trilogy.

So. The humans just. Stayed mad about Trask for fifty fucking years while working on the slowest weapons development project in the history of the arms race. Which has the knock-on effect of meaning that none of the mutant-human relations stuff from the original trilogy mattered, 'cause the humans were building the Sentinels behind the scenes that whole time.

That is an incredibly bleak revision. @_@

Nobody tell Charles, but if there was enough hatred towards mutants to sustain a fifty-year grudge over Trask's death, it wasn't really about Trask's death.

[poppetsisters]

Now that my rage over the Doomcasting has simmered down, I just wanna gush over the Fantastic Four comi con stuff.

I'm not joking, when I heard that Michael Giacchino was doing the score, I SCREAMED. Not only is he famous for scoring The Incredibles, but he also did Speed Racer from 2008 which, if you haven't heard that score, it is one of the best scores for any film I've seen.

The period accurate footage is such a treat. I figured Matt Shakman's work on Wandavision was going to be indicative of what the Fantastic Four was gonna look like and yet it looks even better. I was nervous that Shakman's lack of feature film experience was gonna be a detriment, but his decades of work on TV gives him amazing instincts for character dynamics, which is one of the most important assets when making a Fantastic Four movie.

A lot of what we saw is pre-vis and may not actually be in the movie, but the retro-future vibe of the movie is perfect. The fact that MCU Fantastic Four is taking place in its own separate pocket away from all the bullshit really helps me feel excited for this movie. For once, the disconnectedness is something I'm EXCITED about, go figure.

Again, because it's pre-vis, not a whole lot of glimpses at The Thing's rocky form, in fact none of the powers were shown off for understandable reasons. I have no worries that The Thing is going to look good. As bad as Fant4stic was, The Thing looked pretty good in that film. Korg also never looked outright bad to me either, and they're probably gonna put more effort into how he looks anyway. Sue's powers are probably gonna be represented well seeing as invisibility is a really easy power to do VFX for. Fire graphics have come a long way as well, and that concept art makes me thing they may take a very stylised approach to his flame effects. Reed however is the one I'm really worried about. The only time stretch powers looked good was The Incredibles 1 and 2, but those were both stylised 3D animated filma. Live action has a much higher bar to clear with a heavy risk of uncanny valley Pedro Pascal. If you can make that man look bad, then you know you fucked up.

The Fantasticar is nice. We had the Dodge in Rise of Silver Surfer and the Bathtub in Deadpool and Wolverine, and though I like the Silver Surfer one (despite the shameless product placement) I get that they wanted a car that looked like a mid-century man's idea of what a flying car looks like. The only think is that I wish it could split apart into four sections, it doesn't look like it can do that. Oh well.

The spacesuits look good, the colours are exactly what I imagined they'd be on the concept art, but I'm waiting for the proper super suits to be shown off. Hopefully they have less interlocking parts and resemble the slightly thick and comfy spandex we saw in the concept art.

It looks like Pedro is keeping the moustache, which normally I'm not a fan of Reed with facial hair, but I also think it gives Reed a sorta Howard Hughes look that helps him blend in with the aesthetics of the world. The grey around the temples is good though, and it seems like he's also doing a transatlantic accent which frankly is very surprising.

I thought that Ebon wasn't doing an accent until I rewatched him during an interview. He appears to be toning down his natural tendency to draw out his A's and E's. It was only two lines of dialogue so I don't know, but what is very apparent is that he's not going for the outrageous brooklyn accent The Thing is legendary for in the comics, but something a little more subtle and believable.

Vanessa Kirby and Joseph Quinn are both different flavors of British, and though Joseph only says one word, it's pretty clear both are foregoing their natural accents. That said, Vanessa's choice of, what I can only guess is a slight mid-western accent, is very interesting. I was not expecting that choice.

They added a subtitle to the movie. Fantastic 4: First Steps. I think they didn't need to add a subtitle, but since they did. I'll just give it a cursory analysis. I think you can derive FOUR meanings from the title: First Steps calls to mind humanity's first steps on the Moon, fitting for a space age tale. First Steps also feels like a good title for their first adventure. First Steps works metatextually as their first steps into the MCU (which isn't technically true with those two cameos in MoM and D&W), but the most important theory I have for First Steps is in relation to a baby's first steps. I think that Franklin is going to be in this movie as a major plot point. Serving what purpose, I'm not sure.

To finish things off, we only get a look at Galactus through a window, so not much I can comment on in terms of appearance, but I'm very happy that it's an actual dude and not shadows within a cosmic cloud. He looks very imposing and I hope we get more perspective shots like that to sell how big this guy is.

[thevoicefromanotherworld]

"HOLY FUCK"

WARNING :THIS STORY CONTAINS PROFOUND LANGUAGE AND EXPLICIT SEX

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!

By the way! I almost forgot to say it lol. This story is inspired by the phrase Deadpool says in Deadpool and Wolverine when they arrive at the dump as Wade calls it where Cassanda is, and introduces himself.

He doesn't tell her his name (she already knows it) instead he says:

I'm Marvel Jesus, Mj if your nasty

So, yes. We could say that this shot is inspired by a phrase. The truth is that it occurred to me while watching the movie for the fourth time ngl

After Wade and Logan saved their timeline, the only thing you two had done was fuck like crazy people.

When you saw him again and explained what you'd done, you almost didn't believe him. It all sounded like something out of a Nolan movie or something. You finally believed him, because he was your boyfriend and you loved him and all those things that Gen Z says now.

After giving you some context about what had happened, he assured you that he did it for you. Because he couldn't imagine living in a world, in a timeline, in whatever the fuck it was, where you weren't there.

He'd spent every fucking day since he'd gotten back showing you how much he'd missed you.

It was the second orgasm you'd had that night, and you had no intention of stopping. At that moment the words of security that you had both agreed upon didn't matter, the only thing you needed was to unload your anxiety and the love you had for each other on the other, so there you were, giving yourselves completely to pleasure.

A scream escaped your lips when you rotated your hips on him, while throwing your head back. The cold barrel of his Desert Eagle pistol (which he never parted with) slid across your lips making you gasp.

-Shit baby, you're doing so well - he praised putting his hands on your hips, guiding your movements - I'm going to cum so hard as if I were a fucking virgin on his first time

-Fuck - you moaned pulling him up, the new angle made you both moan on each other's lips when he crashed his lips against yours-

The walls of the apartment were very thin, so the neighbors could hear you as if you were right next to them. You honestly didn't give a shit, all you could think about was how good it felt to have your boyfriend (and his cock) back in your bed.

-I can't… -you muttered- I can't take it anymore, I'm going to…

-Say it –he ordered- I want everyone in this fucking city to know who you belong to, that I'm the only one who makes you cum like that –he whispered- say it –he repeated- scream it

-MJ! -you squealed, noticing how you were emptying yourself-

-That's it -he praised, kneading your hair as your breathing became more even- good girl

-Wade -you murmured, he watched you closely- you haven't cum

-Don't worry -he said- there's nothing a good handjob can't fix -he smiled- I wanted to make you enjoy

-And you have -you said, placing the palm of your hand on his chest so he would lie down on the pillows-

You snaked through his body until you reached the center of his desire

-Let me make you enjoy yourself now -you said, making him roll around on the bed impatiently-

-Baby, you look beautiful with your face between my legs -he murmured, sketching a smile halfway between amused and mischievous- Are you going to suck my cock?

-Yes Wade, I'm going to suck your cock - you said - because it doesn't matter how many lollipops I've tried - he whispered holding it by the base - your flavor is my favorite

-Fucking bitch - he growled - that's the sexiest thing anyone's ever said to me - he said making you smile - don't stop, holy fuck

-I wasn't going to do it - you smiled - put on your special sock nerd, it's gonna get good

[crascet]

X-Men Movie Tier List Update- X-Men: Dark Pheonix

For a while, I have heard how much of a failure "Dark Pheonix" was with people calling this the worst movie out of the franchise, which made me very worried for my first time watching it. "Here we go again," I thought, "a second try of doing the Dark Pheonix saga again, and they're going to fail AGAIN." So I came to this expecting nothing, just maybe hoping if it's at least better than TLS. And then I watched it...

For one thing, they kept the space origin from the comics, so I did get my space-energy-bird-deity, albeit its only just space energy and not be a bird until the ending nor an actual deity. So alright, they got one thing right. What about Jean? Maybe they won't put much of a focus on her, just like TLS- OH MY GOD, THEY MADE HER AN ACTUAL CHARACTER. Like she has a reaction to having the energy manifesting in her during a space rescue mission with the X-Men and feeling fine at first. However, after her first outburst during the night they came back from space, she goes into a short coma, but it was during this time she actually felt that her dad is still alive when at first, she thought he died with her mother following a car accident caused by her first use of her powers, so she goes out to find him.

AND OMG THEY HAVE A BRIEF FOCUS ON SCOTT AND JEAN'S RELATIONSHIP! Scott wants to know if Jean is really ok from the energy and wants her to stay when she woke up from her rest, but Jean wants to look for her dad while not wanting to hurt Scott again, so she puts him to sleep. But when she gets to her family home, that's when she found out that her father gave her to Charles so he can get rid of her. On top of that, the reason that she didn't know that was because Charles put in a mental wall around that memory when he took her to the school. So now, she has a power she can't control AND the fact a part of her life since the accident was a lie the whole time made by Charles. Following that, the X-Men show up to bring her back to the school, but Jean can't trust any of them and fights them, which results in her injuring them and the accidental death of Raven. Feeling that there is no one else she can go to, she then gets advice on how to stop this by going to Erik and his island community he got after the events of "Apocalypse." But that goes nowhere when he asks Jean on who she killed, since she doesn't want to tell him she killed Raven, and the military arrive to take her in, so now she flies off and goes into hiding.

As for the X-Men following Raven's death, they're all just divided on what to do, especially how their reputation following "Apocalypse" has the public treating them as heroes, but now has returned to seeing them as a threat, with the government now putting up camps for mutants, following the fight with Jean. Scott and Charles still want to go after her to help her, while Hank just wants to kill her to avenge Raven. There is this excellent scene between Hank and Charles with hank chastising Charles and how it was his fault that Raven is dead by lying to Jean the whole time, this then leads to Hank asking help from Erik, which he agrees to since Hank told him that Jean killed Raven.

There's this whole moral dilemma on what to do with Jean: do they get her and give her the help she needs despite she could possibly kill them all and put the world in further danger, or do they kill her and help the greater good for the sake of mutant/human relations and avenging Raven? This... THIS IS ACTUALLY GOOD! I was thoroughly invested in this whole thing! I legitimately thought that this was going to be underrated, like "The Wolverine."

And then I saw the second half and I understood why. The second half just falls apart with it just feeling rushed to me with a lot of cuts through it. I'm not sure if there was a short deadline during the writing process or if they don't know what to do. For one thing, some of the characters just feel that they're there just to help the rest, with Ororo and Kurt being by the sidelines. Peter is out of the movie past the fight with Jean by being in a coma and only comes back in the ending. I felt like there was gonna be an arc with Kurt not wanting to kill anyone until he has to, since he started being kill-happy on the aliens in the train after an officer died. Scott should have a bigger role here in wanting to help Jean since he didn't have much after the first half, hell you could also show a little bit of him becoming a field leader.

The whole sequence and how they teamed up in the train definitely felt rushed since they all agreed to protect Jean from the aliens. I get it's because Charles convinced Erik since that's what Raven would've done but couldn't there be a new climax be at the camp they get sent to and that's where they agree to help and have the train just be them debating on who's right or wrong?

Raven is kinda weird here. I understand that she is just worried about the team in how Charles treats them as soldiers doing everything for humankind. Also, that X-Women line is just hilariously bad writing wise. I would've liked a bonus scene of Raven telling Charles on how he should've told Jean the truth about her father and not just hide it from her and treat the rest of the team like actual people. This can coincide with an arc that has Charles deciding to leave the role of leader and head of the school and give it Hank at the end of the movie.

The aliens were meh here, just generic "We want to take over the world and restart everything for us to live in" stuff by manipulating Jean in using her new powers to their benefit. The weakest part of the movie. Also, that "Emotions make me stronger" line just felt out of nowhere and that should be sort of built up earlier, like when the head alien tells Jean that her powers don't make her human or mutant, but as a goddess and how she shouldn't have emotions since they are "for humans."

Jean just forgiving Charles for the mental block thing is absolutely rushed, like couldn't there be more time here and have Charles apologize to Jean in her mind and how she wants to protect her from her powers, but he now realizes that he shouldn't see her and the team as kids and he should've treated them better.

I really want something more from this, just give more time in writing and production to flesh out the characters here, because this has a very strong first half. I am more disappointed that it didn't pan out well, because if the rest of the movie actually followed that strength, then this could probably be a B tier. But as it is, its just in C tier, although it surprisingly surpassed "Apocalypse," so I'll give it that. I just see a lot of potential here that can be fixed. It is kinda weird how I put it in front of "Apocalypse" and not before it, but that might change one day.

Now this may currently be the last X-Men movie before the MCU makes their own, but its not the last one on this retrospective list, as the last movie is a forgettable one, not that the movie itself is forgettable, just the fact that there are multiple delays and when it was released that it fell out of the public eye. For the last movie, we see a group of teenage mutants in a facility made for them in the middle of nowhere in "The New Mutants." We're in the endgame here, so let's see if it ends with a bang or a whimper.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

here are some other thoughts about the movie

the fact that Wolverine and company cause the Three Mile Island incident would, I guess, suggest that this movie takes place in 1979, assuming it happens at the same time as the real nuclear meltdown, but fuck if I could have guessed that otherwise. that movie could have taken place in 2009, the year it was released, and I'd only be mildly confused by the state of technology. does Wolverine seem like a man who has a phone? fuck no.

Gambit in particular was really dressed like a 21st century pickup artist, very skeevy. stupid little pervert hat. I kept expecting him to ask some woman if she wanted to see a magic trick but that would require letting any woman other than Wolverine's dead girlfriend have speaking lines.

also is she. I mean. her last name is Silverfox and she tells Wolverine a little First Nations story that parallels the plot of the movie but like. I mean her sister is Emma Frost, apparently. I mean I know there are extremely light-skinned and white-passing First Nations and Native people but like. what's her deal. also unrelated to her questionable ethnicity I though it was very funny that Wolverine, who has been to war several times and definitely knows what a dead body looks like, didn't even notice that she was only pretending to be dead. there literally wasn't a single wound on her. she was just laying in the grass covered in blood, no injuries. and then he just left her there??? to go fight his brother??? who somehow killed her by throwing blood on her??? HELLO

I think will.i.am and that man who was a walking fatphobic joke were boyfriends.

it's funny that Scott's in this movie just to have an awful time. really didn't have to be him, could have been any mutant kid. doesn't even really make sense that it's him, honestly. if we assume that the first X-Men movie takes place roughly the year it came out, 2000, and that Scott was between 14 and 18 in '79, then he should be in his mid to late thirties by X1: The First Mutanting. I guess James Marsden could have been playing older but it didn't really seem like Scott was meant to be a man pushing 40. but I guess the chance to kick him around like a football one more time was just too tasty to pass up.

we don't need to talk about Deadpool we all know what's wrong with Deadpool. I want to focus on Gambit again. got the vibes of a Vegas bartender who flirts WAY too hard with married couples staying at the hotel where he works. he saw them from across the bar and liked their vibes, how the tables have turned. I know he's from New Orleans and that's like his whole deal but he feels very Vegas, possibly because no one seems to have informed that actor that he was playing a Cajun.

the ending of this movie is just kind of an unrelenting shitshow. when Professor Chucklefuck Xavier showed up at the end in his little cuck helicopter to whisk the kids away I wanted to smack his bald head off I'm not even kidding. how long did he know about child experiment island before he did something about it. why the fuck did he wait until Wolverine and his girlfriend handled everything and were on the run/dead? thought you were supposed to take care of mutants, bud. his bitch ass can control entire crowds of people and you're telling me he couldn't just remote knock out every guard in the facility to waltz in there and let the kids out himself. this man is a monster. god I hate his stupid bitch ass so much.

and then there's Wolverine getting shot in the head so bad he forgets his entire backstory which is like. hello. how do you shoot a man point blank in the head in such a way that he maintains the ability to speak, move, know that he should run from the police, etc but he forgets every single personal detail about his life. it's like they had almost wrapped filming and then remembered at the last minute that Wolverine has amnesia in the first X-Men movie and it's like a pretty deal. uuuuh fuck it I don't know, shoot him in the head. whatever. presumably Sabertooth also wandered off and got a lobotomy some time in the intervening 30 years.

this movie is great everyone should watch it.

experienced little art film called X-Men Origins Wolverine last night and I have to say. textbook case of a movie trying so hard to be a manly dude action movie that it circles around to being extremely homoerotic. every man in that movie wants Logan carnally. Wade? goes without saying. Agent Zero? wants to kiss Wolverine so bad it makes him look stupid. Gambit? as far as I can tell Gambit only came back to save Wolverine's ass at the end so that they could make sweaty love on a shitty houseboat later. (you know Gambit has a houseboat, look at him.) unfortunately the most roiling tension of all was definitely between Wolverine and his brother who is Definitely Not The Same Sabertooth From The First Movie. jilted lover ass brother. woman scorned situation. I think genuinely Sabertooth might not have turned out like that if he and Wolverine had ever just made love in a WW1 foxhole.

[wh0re4gambit]

🂡 ʀᴇᴍʏ ʟᴇʙᴇᴀᴜ 🂡 ᴰᵒ ᵘ ˡⁱᵏᵉ ˢᵗᵃʳ ʷᵃʳˢ?

ʀᴇᴍʏ ʟᴇʙᴇᴀᴜ x ꜰᴇᴍᴀʟᴇ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

x-ᴍᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴɪᴍᴀᴛᴇ��� ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ

²:³⁴ ᵃ.ᵐ

»All X-Men to the War-Room. Immediately.«

The not so unfamiliar sound of an alarm echoed through the school in the middle of the night to wake up the X-Men.

Y/N lifted her head up after the alarm repeated itself and stood up with a grown. As much as she would love to stay in bed and keep sleeping, she had job to do now.

Or more like probably, because sometimes the professor wakes the whole team up just to see how fast they'd react.

She put on the nearest leggings, which were just some simple black ones, figured out how to put on her bra with still a t-shirt on and grabbed her grey sweatshirt-jacket, because it can be cold sometimes down there.

On her way to the War-Room, she came across a certain thief she had lied her eyes upon some time ago. But what she didn't know was that the feeling was mutual.

The Cajun and her met each other before they became X-Men, due them both being exceptional thieves and having the same targets. They eventually teamed up, one being able to blow things up with a single touch and the other one being able to turn stuff into dust, as well just with a single touch.

Most of the X-Men gathered in the War-Room all with look on their face like they could still remember their dreams.

The last one to arrive was the man himself who started the alarm; professor Charles Xavier, leader of the X-Men.

»I am truly sorry for interrupting your need and well deserved sleep for just a training.«

You could hear The Wolverine growl.

»You can go back to sleep now, all of you arrived just in time.« And then he went out of the War-Room like he didn't just wake us up after a long exhausting day.

»Going back to sleep, my ass« Y/N muttered under her breath and went to the kitchen to grab an energy.

Because something not many know is, the moment you hear the sound of these serenes, all kinds of scenarios go through your head. Whether its the school being on fire for the 79210 time or another crazy villain on their way to kill humanity or whatever. Just simply going back to bed after this rush of adrenaline is nearly impossible.

»Why didn't ya' go back ta' bed, chere? I'm sure you could need some sleep.« Gambit asked while stepping into the kitchen.

»Still asking questions you already know the answers to?« Y/N asked with a bit of sarcasm and turned her head into his direction and saw how he grabbed a bottle of water.

»Actually...« he started to say while sitting down in front of her »... der' is one question ah' have no answer for.«

»And that would be?« She asked curiously.

»Promise nothings' gonna' be weird after that.«

Y/N just nodded which was enough of a response for Remy.

»I've been thinking-« he started but stopped when he saw how Y/N started to raise a brow »ah' didn't even start.«

»Yeah didn't like the part of you thinking, but go on.« She told him sarcastically with grin on her face which made him smile.

»I've been thinkin' we know each other for a long time now and ah' was wondering if, this gon' sound stupid but its still important, do ya' like Star Wars?«

'He's kidding, right' Y/N thought.

»Yeah, of course. Who doesn't?« She overplayed her disappointment.

» Ah great, so ya' wanna watch a movie before da' rest of da' school wakes up?«

»Yesssss«

###

After ten minutes of discussing wether they should watch a prequel or original movie they finally agreed on prequel.

The not really sneaky, but still sneaky person gambit is, he only took one blanket, because he had a plan B which has to work, because he already messed up plan A. He was about to tell Y/N that he has strong feelings for her, but instead he decided to ask a stupid question.

In just the first 30 minutes in, they already started to become closer, until the Cajun man felt the weight of Y/N head laying on his chest.

He looked down to see a peaceful sleeping

Y/N. He tried to enjoy the moment, but got interrupted by him falling asleep as well.

Moments later the youngest of the group, Jubilee, happened to catch this moment and didn't hesitate to take a picture.

###

ᴡᴀɴɴᴀʙᴇ ᴍʏꜱᴛɪQᴜᴇ

ᴶᵘᵇⁱˡᵉᵉ:

You owe me 10$

*picture*

ᴹᵒʳᵖʰ:

😑

[bi-scottsummers]

Only thing I know about X Men Evolution is that Wolverine's costume has tasteful sideboob lol. tbh I didn't know anything about X-Men until 2020, when I was in a fandom discussion and someone mentioned Magneto and Charles Xavier and I had no clue who they were talking about. Then my best friend (she and her fiance love X-Men, especially Wolverine) convinced me to watch the 90s X-Men cartoon

it’s fashion babyyyyy

I can’t speak to the 90s xmen stuff because my taste in animated shows is like. specifically that early 2000s era, with xmen evo and the animated justice league (unlimited) cartoons etc etc but the reason I love scott in evolution is because a) he’s a fucking dork. just a complete and total nerd who manages to say the weirdest shit imaginable with a straight face (I’m not sure if you’ve seen the “THEN TAKE IT RAW” scene but I’ve rb’d it several times on this blog so I encourage you to take a look if you haven’t already), b) hes very morally uptight but that doesnt always mean he agrees with his teammates (specifically there’s this scene where they’re doing a virtual training sequence and they programmed rogue to be the villain and he was Not Cool With It, even though at this specific time she was technically ‘The Bad Guy’) and seeing the contrast between what he thinks is Good or Right vs what Xavier and the others think is okay was really interesting, c) his relationships with the others? *chefs kiss* perfect. he’s a big brother in this show (can’t remember if he was older or younger than Alex in the movies or any other versions) and even though he believes Alex is dead for a good while in this show you can still tell he’s used to being a big bro cause he acts like it, especially w Kurt and kitty. It’s kinda sad to think about sometimes, yknow, that he had to grow up fast bc he lost his entire family at 10 yrs old so he’s Major Serious now but the younger members tend to bring out the kid in him and those moments have a special place in my heart. He’s incredibly loyal to the people he cares about and while it’s not always warranted & kind of stupid sometimes (cough cough, letting Alex convince him to trust magneto that one time, cough cough) it’s an admirable trait and it works in his favour a lot of the time, specifically when the xmen are trying to win over rogue (even though sometimes he tends to bulldoze over others in an effort to save his friends, regardless of whether or not they need it, he’s not an amazing listener at first but that changes with time lol), and d) it’s so much less annoying because he’s a teenager. the whole premise of this show is basically just the xmen but as kids except for Xavier, Storm & Wolverine, so all the stupid and/or annoying shit he does can be chalked up to him just being a dumbass kid. And it’s not as if he doesn’t learn from his mistakes or admit his faults because he does! He’s definitely bullheaded and he fucks up but he’s usually pretty good at admitting fault and moving on from it, which I was veryyyy relieved by. Like specifically his relationship with Rogue & Lance Alvers from the Brotherhood of Evil (yes that’s the actual name, I know it’s a ridiculously over-the-top, looney toons-esque kind of crazy, I still love it) is really interesting because you get the impression that Scott’s very set in this idea that people are (mostly) incapable of changing and so he’s very skeptical when Lance tries to initiate this whole courtship with Kitty, but when there’s inevitably a team up with the xmen and the brotherhood of dramatic names it ends with a sense of mutual respect from both scott and Lance… at least for that episode. With rogue it’s a bit different bc she’s not like looking to do harm, which scott recognizes (and I think he sees a bit of himself in her bc rogue is so lost when we’re first introduce to her and I can only imagine how he felt after losing his family & discovering he can shoot uncontrollable lasers from his eyes in the span of 24 hours) butttttt this is way too long already so I digress lol.

Again, don’t know much about the 90s cartoons but evo scott summers is wonderful, I loved the show when I was a kid and I still like it a lot even now :)

[sebastianshaw]

Meme from "Broad City" quotes

“You said if you were ever going to do same sex experimentation, it was going to be with me.”

"Who would you rather go down on you? Michael Bublé or Janet Jackson?”

“Can Janet Jackson go down on me while Michael Bublé narrates it in song?”

“What’s an Arch de Triumph?”

“It’s when two dudes go down on us, is how I picture it, and they’re butt to butt and then you and I do Oprah hands.”

“I really don’t feel like going into work today.”

"Great, I’ll see you in 30 days then. . . biiiiitch.”

“Maybe your dad should have pulled out.”

“I need someone for the amazing race because my mom just pulled out.”

“I also have business with the bank. I’d like to cash these nickels, and I’ll have them in quarters, please. Thank you so much.”

“I’m a sexual X-Man. I’m Wolverine. I’m Vulvarine!”

"Oh my Lady God, thank you!"

“The vagina is nature’s pocket. It’s natural and responsible.”

“I would take you on my shoulders – like I’d strap you up and be like, ‘Let’s go through helllll.’”

“I’m not sexually aroused, I’m fiscally aroused.”

“That’s literally a one stop pussy shop. I love it!”

“I finally figured out my eyebrows, They’re sisters, not twins.”

“Four R’s, my friend-- Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, Rihanna.”

“Statistically we’re headed toward an age where everybody’s going to be, like, caramel and queer.”

“I’m an adult and I’m responsible. Let’s go get some candy.”

“I finally masturbated above the covers without my eyes being closed.”

“I just want to get home and watch my shows.”

"You just pulled a bag of pot out of your vagina."

"Do you ever get hair from your head stuck in your buttcrack in the shower?"

"I'm still not over Amy Winehouse."

"I can't really imagine what it's like for people with blue eyes."

"This isn't a sugar daddy thing. This is just an old established guy paying for his younger friend who he also has sex with kind of thing."

"You're like 12, right?"

"I love me some dumplings. It's like a squirrel clutch with a meatball in it."

"I was so worried I baked a whole cake and then I ate a whole cake."

"In da clerb, we all fam."

"I know you from your ass better than I know your face."

"I respect you respecting me."

"You know what's cool about this party? We're the sexiest girls here."

"I'll pick up your poop. You're worth it."

"This is what living on the edge looks like."

"You got beauty. You got brains. You're a fucking genius. Do you wanna kiss?"

"You look sexy and vivacious and artsy and, like, young-wife material but, like, taut and teasy still. It's a perfect combo."

“Witches aren’t monsters, they’re just women! They’re fucking women who cum and giggle and play in the night. And that’s why everybody wants to set them on fire ‘cause they’re so fucking jealous."

"YAS KWEEN!"

“I AM NOT A MOM!”

"You never know if you never try and if you never try you never know."

“I’m only 27, what am I? A child bride?”

"You have been busting my balls all day over a sahaaaandwich shahooppe?!"

"I don’t watch anything but solo porn because regular porn is like, “Shut up, little girl! Wash my feet!” And she’s like "uhhh don’t tell my dad ok? Because I’m just barely legal. I love shaved pubes and tanned, crispy bellies and taints.” It’s like ugh!"

"I don’t have any money. I’m a wittle baby."

“Buckle up, buttercup”

"Money is a mind control technique that used to quantify the progress of the patriarchy!"

"Nose, vagina, butthole. If God didn’t want us to put our fingers up then then why did She make them perfectly finger sized ?"

"I’ll see you when u wake up, and if you don’t wake up I’ll still see you cause I’m gonna kill myself and meet you in heaven or whatever.”

"If you train your eyes, you can see their religion”

“I know it’s like “pwease Mr. Cwusty old white man, can I pwease keep my ovaries?” Alright bitch you better vote, text me when you do”

“I mean we had been together how long, and I still never saw nipples?”

“OOPS I guess I don’t know my own strength”

“Pillows are nature’s packing peanuts!”

“The student has become the teacher!”

"This is some high class shit."

"It's 2014. Anal is on the menu."

"Where ISN'T the bathroom?"

"I was cyberbullied within an INCH of my life last night"

“I saw your tweets and I wanted to check you out but I also wanted to respect your space”

"I am going to respect your dick later."

“You’re my lil cupcake”

“I once ate a corn on the cob. Including the cob”

"Ugh, who YELLS?"

"GET OFF THE BALLS AND GO!"

"Wanna get, like, a bunch of hot dogs?"

"Did you draw that painting?"

“You have to swipe yaas, you can’t swipe naas.”

“I fucked you in the ASS the first night we did ANYTHING. I think that’s pretty fuckin mature."

"Well aren't you a hot diggity dog and a scalawag to boot?"

"In the club, we are all family. Are you racist?"

“Welcome to Florida, America’s droopy dick”

"This is the men's room. Uh DOIIII!"

“You’re so full of shit I need a plunger."

“Thank you SO much for calling me a star”

"I'm an adult. I should be buying my own pot."

"Coat racks AREN'T for babies!"

"My biggest weakness is that I lose my purse a lot. But my biggest strength is that I always get it back."

"I like to call it jazz becomes it comes out of my horn, and you never know where it's gunna go."

"White people do that dog thing. Black people don't make out with dogs."

"Next thing you know you're pregnant with his sperm and he's sanding down your headboard shirtless."

"We are garbage people living on garbage island!"

"I didn't know you had a veneer and I'm in that mouth on a regular basis."

"I'm not putting weed up inside of me because I'm an adult and I'm responsible."

"I really think you should put your weed in your front hole."

“We’re technically homeless right now.”

"Your ass looks incredible."

"Your ass looks incredible. Your head and body too. But we all know who’s the star of the show here.”

“Who am I? Honey, I have a cyst on my uterus and I need to get fucked until it pops.”

“You want me to FaceTime from the bathroom?”

“Dude, I would follow you into hell, brother!”

“Well, you are funny.”

"Animated movies are where it's at. They're like visual crack."

"All Hollywood media is porn, and all porn is kiddie porn. We live in a rape culture. We just do."

"Who would leave weed in a wall? A weed genius. And she'd leave it there indefinitely in case of emergency."

"Isn't it nuts that pickles were cucumbers? They're the trans people of the vegetable community."

"We are an incredible team and I love you."

"Smart and sexy. She is unreal, this girl."

"I've been overeating this week."

"How DARE you LIE to your WIFE?!"

"Do I or do I not have herpes?"

"Follow your third eye--your clit."

"It's my birthday, I'M KING OF THE WORLD!"

"I mean, the female form---God's hottest creation."

"You have to respect the sanctity of the RSVP."

"Okay, something seems very locked up inside of you."

"You have a way of tainting everything I love."

"I'm gonna be like a successful artist any day now."

"Yeah, I don't wanna rise and grind anymore. I wanna rise and then like lay back down."

"It's like we knew it would happen but we didn't do anything about it."

"ADRENALINE!"

"To be honest, I'm really happy with the way I look."

"WANNA FOOK?"

"Never have I ever read a newspaper."

"This is what living on the edge looks like."