#i did try but i only gave him like 2 coffees i didn't even know i could get over four hearts that quickly
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nadas-dirthalen · 3 days ago
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I Chose the Wrong Romance in a Game About Regret, and It Made the Game Better
A love letter to BioWare about Dragon Age: the Veilguard.
I don't have the thoughts in me for a formal review of all the aspects of gameplay at this time, nor do I have the brainpower for dissecting my every theory just yet.
But tonight, I want to write to you about the thing that stuck with me the most about Dragon Age: the Veilguard. And that is... I chose the wrong romance for my Rook, and it made the game unforgettable.
Veilguard endgame spoilers below the cut.
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(I just liked this tiny screencap, okay. This specific dialogue isn't what I want to talk about.)
For a few days now, I've been trying to think of how to phrase what I want to say. The emotions I felt in the endgame of Veilguard were massive—to the tune I became dehydrated. To convey why that was, I think I have to start at the beginning.
This is the story of Winged Death: the party, the romance, and the headcanons that formed a nightmare combination to break me emotionally.
Meet my Rook: Thenera Sa'renan Aldwir, or Nera for short. A Veil Jumper who lost her mom to blight sickness when she was a teen; who tried to find the Wardens at Skyhold only to learn they'd been exiled; who joined the Veil Jumpers to protect people, but also honor her mother's memory. (Yes, all of this becomes relevant.)
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Her name is taken from elven: Thenera from theneras (dream), and Sa'renan from sa (one; one more) and renan (voice). I used the patronymic system outlined in Project Elvhen: Sa'renan was her mother's name. I chose all this in late August, long before I'd really theorized anything substantive about Veilguard.
I did not know how much it would hurt.
All through the game, I got more and more into Nera's head. This was helped out a lot by how much footage I'd seen in September, how I knew Nera would be the "throw a chair while beating up an entire bar" Rook rather than try any attempt at diplomacy. How I knew she'd punch the First Warden without second thought, despite not knowing what the First Warden had done before Weisshaupt. She was always the "hit things with rocks to fix them" Veil Jumper to me, just like Bellara's dialogue references.
It also meant that I felt a lot of her insecurity in the early game: her doubt in her own intellect; her insecurity in her Dalish identity from being kicked out of her clan as a child and living in Wycome as a young adult; her acute awareness of her own trauma and fear around all things blight. To mirror my Inquisitor, who had Dirthamen vallaslin, I gave Nera Falon'Din vallaslin, to signify that she had seen too much death at far too young an age.
I even picked a party for her "default" group: Lucanis and Davrin. Because of Nera's Falon'Din vallaslin, Lucanis' demon wings, and Assan's battlefield presence, I gave my group a name: Winged Death.
And I loved them.
But just like I'd headcanoned a lot of Nera's backstory, I also hypothesized a lot about the Lucanis romance. And, to put it briefly... the game did not match what I expected, and the Lucanis romance was not to my enjoyment, personally. (If you like it, good! I'm glad you do! This post is about Nera, though.)
Right away, Lucanis asked about Nera's favourite drink. When she said tea and he made a disgusted noise and nothing else, I reloaded, choosing the "better" answer of liking the same coffee as him—something that prompted more dialogue. For me, in hindsight, this was the first moment I should have seen that for all Lucanis' charm, he would not fit my gruff, chair-throwing Veil Jumper. But I'd committed, and I was determined to see it through just once.
I didn't want Veilguard to be the story of an elf romancing an elf—for me, that was my Inquisitor's story. I wanted a new flavour.
Only... Lucanis' romance, for Nera, did not pick up much from there. Almost the entirety of act 2 was silent—and that was after saving Treviso. Lucanis seemed to care more for Neve and Minrathous than he did for Rook, in my perception. By then, I'd sunk into Nera's headspace, and I could feel her feeling neglected. I could feel her insecurities rearing their ugly heads: was she too blunt? Not intelligent enough? Somehow too elven, even for a Crow, whose organization is made up of so many elves?
You know who she constantly found acceptance in, though? Whose approval triggered almost every time Nera answered a question honestly, in the stern way that she was predisposed to do?
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Davrin. The other half of Winged Death. The one who, now, was bickering with Lucanis almost nonstop in party banter, each constantly jabbing the other about how death would come for them, death would claim all they'd known, their choices would bury them.
Lucanis had precious few opportunities to discuss Nera being an elf; an elf Rook facing down their own gods. But Davrin? Davrin talked about it so much, he would know the horror of being called Da'len by Elgar'nan.
Together, they survived the Cauldron. And where did they shelter? In the ribcage of a slain archdemon. But not just any archdemon.
Zazikel. Who has been confirmed now, in a Veilguard codex, as Falon'Din's archdemon.
And where were the griffons allowed to go, at the end? Arlathan.
I could never have foreseen those parallels, and yet? There they were, piling up too late. I'd already made Nera's choices for her, and I'm not someone who would normally attempt a love triangle.
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(She's so pleased with their shenanigans. Just look at that totally carefree and happy face.)
Lucanis' content dried up for Nera, but stayed pretty consistent for Neve—to the point that she had begun to feel sincerely cast aside. I began playing her with that mindset: as if she'd been set adrift, even as she locked in Lucanis' romance.
Around 45 hours into my ~60 hour playthrough, I found myself thinking... maybe I try the Davrinmance next game. Maybe I reroll Nera, even as a Veil Jumper again, to see those griffons in Arlathan. To see two Dalish elves haunted by the same ghosts, and see how they grow. I talked to friends about it. I even headcanoned some more, trying to see how Nera's narrative and personality might slot in with Davrin's questline.
In my head, that looked a little like Nera realizing she felt stronger kinship and connection with Davrin, but denying that to herself. She was, after all, locked in with someone else.
I let myself laugh at this, taking more screenshots of Nera and Davrin than of Nera and Lucanis, right up until the beginning of act 3.
And that's how BioWare got me.
If you're here, you know what comes next. I didn't.
I thought I needed Harding to potentially face down Solas, thanks to her line about wanting to look him in the eye after one of Solas' memories. I thought, maybe, some dialogue would unlock by having Harding in the party during any potential final confrontation.
This was the second time I went against Nera's own character: I chose to keep Harding at Nera's side, rather than Davrin. I did it for my Inquisitor.
And at first, I thought Davrin was surviving my choice.
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I even felt happy—proud—that I freed him during the Ghilan'nain fight. I thought if I delayed too long, he might die to the fight's mechanics. But he survived that, too.
Then, the worst played out before my eyes: Lucanis going to take the shot at Ghilan'nain. Being caught. Davrin, racing in to defend. Being impaled. Lucanis hitting Ghilan'nain, only to appear suddenly dead—dead, somehow, how could he be dead, I'd just seen him?—seconds later.
Because of Arlathan, I'd thought this was just another Elgar'nan trick. Solas would come to save us soon. He had to. This was just fake-Solas, conjured by Elgar'nan to make Rook lash out or feel lost. Right?
It didn't hit me until I was in the Fade, and Solas was gone. Until Neve's statues were everywhere, because Nera had chosen Neve to risk that dangerous magic. Neve, who was her very antithesis; who was human enough and sophisticated enough and eloquent enough in ways my spellblade had struggled with reconciling since her teen years.
Saying it was my fault, that my Rook chose this for her—and she had. Her decision was motivated by her favour for Bellara.
I think this is when my Rook stopped denying things to herself. Right here.
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This was the person she was closest with in her own party. This was the person who shared her feelings on both her culture and the blight. This was the person who brought joy to her days, with more meaningful dialogues (in Nera's opinion!) than Lucanis had had since act 1.
It is hard to put into words how hard this moment hit me. She had chosen wrong—and I had chosen for her. I was reminded of Taash's line from after Memory #2: "There was stuff he wanted to tell her. But he waited too long. And then she was dead."
And then she was dead.
My Rook knew why Fade Jail held her so well, in that moment. Even before the Varric reveal that had my tear ducts begging for mercy.
The game's mechanics had done that to her. Locked her into a romance with Lucanis (my choice, hellbent on seeing it through), didn't let her leave, didn't allow for her to say anything akin to, 'Hey, Davrin, not in this worldstate... but how about the next one?' (and all of those, for the record, are 100% understandable, and just the nature of video games!)
Lucanis continued to have little in the way of content that fit Nera, and was First Talon, to boot. Nothing in the game could change that; games aren't designed that way. He was destined for a life she was never going to enjoy, locked in to that choice—and she, and I, should've figured it out sooner.
We didn't. Varric was dead. Everything had been a lie. We'd been duped; played. We were never smart enough; together, we were doomed all along.
Every insecurity I'd imagined for Nera came crashing down. And all of them, I'd gleaned from hints in Companions Week. From the footage that released on September 19, showing Rook's backstory choices. From the overall tone of the promotional material we saw, and the strong emphasis on companions, and the declaration of the theme of regret.
And it culminated in me crying harder than I have at any piece of media.
Ever.
Ever.
BioWare gave me every hint I needed to make a fitting Rook, and every single choice they showed me I could make was a weapon. That's why I not only accept, but appreciate the 'spoilers' that we got from Bioware beforehand. That's why I am so far from jaded about the Lucanismance. I could not denounce this experience if I tried, and you know why?
Because through Lucanis' continued flirtatious banter with Neve, the way he stays continually animated so close to her, and the way he gives the same mid-combat praise to Neve as to Rook, my Rook felt like a woman scorned. And it made the game BETTER.
I wouldn't have cried so hard, for so long, if Nera was allowed to be happy. I wouldn't have been shaken to my core as a Solavellan, wondering if there really could be a light at the end of this long, dark tunnel.
The game wouldn't have hit me like it did if Lucanis hadn't come to Rook to declare his feelings only after she had spent time mourning Davrin and Assan. It wouldn't have hurt so good if Lucanis' dialogue afterward never mentioned his worry for exclusively Neve, and not the loss of Davrin—who he'd travelled with all game long.
But Solas had done it: he had molded Nera into a creature of pure regret.
And I, through my determination to try a romance that turned out not to fit my Rook, had let him.
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The way it was structured, Lucanis' every sweet word rang hollow after Nera was freed from the Fade, and it made Davrin's, Varric's, and (what I thought was) Neve's deaths hurt that much worse.
There was nothing that could fix the pain in Nera's heart, the pain of her wrong choices not just in failing to romance Davrin, but failing to question Solas, failing to notice peculiarities about "Varric" in the Lighthouse. She felt like she failed, and she had. Undeniably. Because no matter where the conclusion of the game would take us, she'd never end up happy. She'd never want the life of a First Talon's spouse.
Every piece of her character lined up with regret, all at once. It all clicked into place, all in two soul-crushing hours.
Her name is Thenera Sa'renan Aldwir—and she was the victim of a dream of just one voice. She wears Falon'Din vallaslin, and was given a moment to spend time alone with the many, many dead.
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Falon'Din: friend of the dead. That was what Nera had become, wasn't it? Because her closest party member—and what might have been her truer love—would not be coming back. Because I could feel that a part of her did not want to leave Fade Jail, and that Emmrich really did have to pull her out.
Winged Death destroyed her.
She rained down fire and lightning all through parts 13 and 14. She became Wrath and Thunder. I let her hit enemies harder than she had to, wasting her mana at every opportunity. Let her vent her every frustration. All I could think of, through the hurt, was this codex.
Elgar'nan, Wrath and Thunder, Give us glory. Give us victory, over the Earth that shakes our cities. Strike the usurpers with your lightning. Burn the ground under your gaze. Bring Winged Death against those who throw down our work.
Nera became all that was left of Winged Death, having let Lucanis fight with the Crows, taking Taash and Harding instead.
Elgar'nan was resistant to all her magic in that final fight. She was weakest at the end, and I didn't want to change her specialization to avoid that fact. She was broken, deep down. Solas' happy ending did not fix what the game had done to Nera's heart.
She, the other half to my Inquisitor, ended up with the opposite fate. Where my Inquisitor's journey on the din'anshiral was ending (or at least, was no longer alone), Nera had thought she had the companionship she wanted, only to wind up on the din'anshiral alone, with no way of recovering Davrin.
Which brings me to her last parallel: Solas' devotion to Mythal. Saying that if he did not tear down the Veil, then "I—she would have died for nothing."
To love someone and say nothing; it twisted them both up inside. Rook and Solas, always intended to be mirrors. One death, enough for each of them to bring the Eldest of the Sun to his knees. To change the elven pantheon forever.
I don't know how I managed to stumble upon this level of pain, but I could not be gladder that I did.
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So, at the end of this extremely long post, here is my praise for BioWare. You mad geniuses, if any of you ever, ever see this... you wove regret into this game so well, so deeply, that my own passing thoughts about romance beats and game mechanics wound up stabbing me an additional time in Fade Jail, just as deep as the wound of Varric's death.
So well was this narrative constructed that I found my Rook in every corner of this story, even its tiniest references twining with every headcanon I had made.
Veilguard is so good, so profound, that a romance that did not work for me made the game better. That, to me, is the mark of a kickass narrative: one that fits almost any headcanon while still delivering on a deep, resonant theme.
BioWare couldn't have known that my party would be "Winged Death." Couldn't have known Nera, or her position as a Veil Jumper, or her doubt in her own intellect and her own ability to love. Yet, that is the beauty of Veilguard and of Dragon Age in general: they don't have to know. The writing is brilliant enough that it fits as much as one single story can in terms of possibility, while still hitting home with the same theme for everyone.
So thank you, BioWare. Thank you to every writer, to every animator, to every amazing, talented human whose hands and minds touched this game.
I needed the cry after a hard year, and you all delivered in the best way. I'm doing the Davrinmance now—because I think it's right to try it, and I think Nera deserves it—but this run will always hold the dearest place in my heart. The one where the regret bloomed, in part, because of jokes and headcanons I had made in the middle of a romance I did not enjoy, wishing for a different second playthrough.
The one where it all stabbed me, all at once. You bastards. (affectionate)
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spoonv · 8 months ago
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consider me the rizzler
I got Harvey up to five hearts before the flower dance and I wasn't even trying all that hard it's a dream come true
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darkstaria · 3 months ago
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Yandere Batfam - Soulmate Soul Animal Au.
Chapter 5:
Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4. Chapter 6.
Sorry for the long weight everyone! I had to binge allll of Stranger Things for a friend's future birthday event and ohhh wow I thought the episodes were gonna be 20 minutes not 40-1hr
Also I suffered a bit of writers block, it happens
But regardless, I hope you all enjoy! ^ ^
(also the taglist has migrated to the bottom of the fic because it's a bit too long now)
----
The office was large, sprawling walls contained by an even bigger ceiling. The faint humming of Tim’s computer provided no reassurance, nor did the soft leather of your seat. It felt as if you could sink right into it, and try to fade away. There was a faint aroma of coffee that lingered around the office, but it gave you no solace. It just reminded you of the mistakes you made, to end up here. The elephant in the room.
Tim’s smile was bright, a warm sun. You were burning.
“It’s.. nice to see you again.” You attempted, words stumbling about on your tongue. You couldn't help it, the mere presence of your soulmate sending anxiety skyrocketing down your spine. Why couldn't he just get to the point?
“I didn't really expect my company and Wayne Enterprises to be working together.” You continued, a fake smile plastered onto your face. “What a nice coincidence!”
“I hope for us to have a successful collaboration.” Tim replies, still smiling. “But enough about the companies, it's been so long since I've seen you, and I didn't have your number to text.”
You laugh in response, a pale imitation of a real laugh. You had hoped to focus on discussing the work you both had to do first, and then escape before any catch up talks were attempted. Unfortunately, it appears that Tim won't let you do any actual work before engaging with him.
Your nails dug into your knees, an attempt to stay calm. Your reply was measured.
“Oh are you sure? Surely it would be better to get work on the collaboration done first, then we’ll have all the time left to chat freely.”
“I wouldn't worry about that, really. We’ve got plenty of time together, and I wouldn't be able to work without knowing how you're doing lately. Since you didn't have the time to text, I presume you've been busy?”
“Ah, right! Yes! Yes I have been, busy that is, you know how it is with work. Endless and all that.” You were frustrated at being pushed into a lie already. Tim was in charge here and he knew it.
“Why don't you give me your number then?” His smile was perfect, as flawless as his manipulation. “That way, when you're too busy to remember to message, I can remind you.”
You frowned. Like he didn't know your number already.
Quickly remembering you had to smile, you gave him your number, watching as he slowly typed it in, then texted. Only when you showed you received his text did he relent.
The ‘meeting’ continued on from there, Tim asking about all your hobbies and passions. Time ticked on, daylight turning to evening. Any attempt from you to redirect the conversation to either himself or work was swiftly dismissed. A small part of you admired his skill, he was playing you like a doll. You knew it, but you had no option but to play along. It was like an older sibling playing pretend with the young sibling. You hated the comparison.
The attention was unnerving. Your only solace was that neither of you had soul animals present currently, which was an absolute miracle.
Actually… what if that isn't a coincidence at all? Could this too have been engineered? Was that even possible?
“So then what’s your opinion on..” The sound of Tim’s voice slammed you back to reality. You quickly focused back in, fearing losing any advantage due to a lack of attention.
Abruptly, an alarm sounded, the noise blazing a path through your eardrums. You jolted in surprise. Tim however, was barely rattled. A frown appeared on his face as he glanced at his phone.
“That was the Arkham Asylum breakout alarm. It's no longer safe to go outside.” With these words Tim got up, walking over to the door and opening it.
“What…?” You mumbled, horrified.
“Stay here.” He commanded, a firm tone in his voice. This was Red Robin. “I’m going to check on the building, don't leave, it isn't safe.”
“Wait! But.. the collaboration.. we didn't..” The words rushed out of your mouth, leaving you feeling like a fool as Tim paused for a moment, to look at you.
“Don't worry.” He smiled, the weight of it bearing down upon you. You felt small. “You can just come in tomorrow, I'm sure your company won't mind.” With the final word said, Tim closed the door, presumably rushing off to become Red Robin. The click of the door felt like a dismissal, a scolding. A reminder to stay in your place.
Once again, you were trapped.
You clenched your fists. He wanted you to stay here, in his territory. You didn't doubt that Wayne Enterprises had amazing security, probably some of the best considering the identities of the owners. This was likely the third most safe place in Gotham, with the first and second places going to Batman’s base and Wayne Manor.
But… you haven't learned anything yet. All that time spent with him and somehow he hadn't brought up that singular, obvious fact. There was no way he didn't know, not with the way he was acting. And yet, he hadn't brought it up. Why?
What was he getting out of this?
Was he hoping that if you assumed he didn't know then you could easily be monitored? Was he just gathering information before acting? Where was the rest of the vigilantes in this?
Your head was spinning, going in circles. You couldn't understand him, you couldn't understand any of them. Why choose to be vigilantes, knowing the costs that life endures? Why were you tied to them, when you were so against a fundamental part of their existence?
You couldn't understand this at all. How could this be the basis of a soulmate bond?
You were… opposites.
You felt the telltale beat of an oncoming headache. For your own sanity, you decided to fold the incoming soulmate crisis into a small cavity of your brain to panic about later.
Fact One: There was an ongoing Arkham Asylum breakout, everyone is either being attacked, hiding away or escaping the city.
Fact Two: Batman and all his partners are going to be occupied for at least several hours if not a day.
Fact Three: You were going to take advantage of this.
It was the perfect time. All your soulmates were occupied, so none of them would be able to pay any attention to you. Red Robin might know your identity, and so the other vigilantes may know as well.
That didn't need to matter. They may have the information, but information itself is useless, if they are unable to act.
Right now, any Gothamite that isn't involved with rogues is either hiding or escaping. You could join the escapes, and get out of Gotham in the rush.
You didn't have to stay here, to play the role of a caged bird. You could escape, before they even got a chance.
You had to try.
You suppressed a shaky sigh, getting up and walking to the door. You tried the door handle.
Locked.
Uh oh. You tried it again, and then a few more times after that, shaking the door eventually in your desperation. Oh come on! You desperately thought to yourself. The one time you finally got the perfect chance and it's being ruined by a locked door.
Wait. You glanced at the small window in the door, the beginnings of an idea sprouting in your head. You glance over at Tim’s desk, noticing a small paper weight. You smile.
Lifting the paperweight, you judge the weight to be enough. Holding it up, you get into position to throw.
Wait.. the door has a keyhole, not a sliding chain, you realize, almost too late.
Ah.
Well that would have been embarrassing.
Sadly, you place the paperweight back down. There goes that idea.
But that wasn't the only door in the office, there was another one, the one that the shouting voice left out of. You approach the door, trying the doorknob.
Click!
It opens! Giving a small laugh, you advance through the door and out into the halls of Wayne Enterprises, a jubilant smile on your face. Whoever was shouting at Tim earlier, you almost wanted to thank them.
You avoid the elevators, instead picking stairs, as you presumed they may also be in lockdown. It didn't take you too long to get down to the ground floor, since the main walking areas were now barren of people.
The ground floor had some unfortunate news to offer you though. The once wildly open doors had now been locked down and barred, an iron wall between you and freedom.
Although, maybe there was some other way, you thought, eyeing the anxious security guards patrolling the front entrance.
Pulling out of your hiding spot, you approach the guards, making to time your steps, making noise to not scare them. You really didn't want to get shot before you had even left the safety of the building.
“P-please help me!” You stuttered, trembling with tears in your eyes. The guards jolted in surprise, turning to face you. They were expecting threats from the outside, not the inside.
“I need to get home, I can't stay here.” You sobbed, the guards pausing in confusion. They didn't know what to do with you.
“What’s wrong?” A sympathetic guard asked, patting you gently on the back. You almost felt bad.
“I need to go home!” You repeated, tone frantic.
A disgruntled guard stepped up to you. “Look, no one can leave right now. Company policy. It isn't safe, there's been an Arkham breakout. Just sit tight, and whatever’s waiting for you at home will be there when you get back.”
“N-no…” You mumbled. “You don't understand.. I have.. I have a cat, waiting for me.” You glance up, watching the expressions on their faces. They seem unmoved. “A-and my child!” You cry out, realizing you needed a better lie.
“A child?” The disgruntled guard repeated, sounding a little more sympathetic, but clearly not convinced. He eyed you up and down, evidentially thinking you looked a little too young.
“They're so little, but my cat likes to take care of them and I needed the money so, so I left them at home alone today. But recently they're been figuring out how to open doors and if anything happened to them I don't know what I’d d-” Your frantic lie is cut off, the disgruntled guard laying a hand on your shoulder.
“Alright listen. None of us can escort you, we're here on the job.”
You nodded, feeling exuberation rush through you.
“But if anything happened, run right back here, alright?”
You nodded again, fighting a smile on your face. The guards unlocked the doors, watching you dash out with frowns on their tired faces.
They were obvious to the beaming smirk on yours.
Nights in Gotham are by nature a little terrifying, but they're nothing compared to an Arkham breakout night. Shadows crawled up alleyways, the smell of booze and smoke lingering in a way it never could on normal nights. The terror was so pungent in the air, you could almost taste it. It was on the tip of your tongue.
Every so often you'd hear a scream, and you'd walk a little faster. Ideally you would have committed to the stealth route, but you had wasted enough time already.
Your house was on the way to the bus station, so you could easily pop in, grab essentials, and get out. You wouldn't lie, you were nervous. Every so often you’d feel your knees lose strength, and you'd have to fight with your body to regain the strength to stand.
But at this point it was either the horror of whatever your soulmates had in store for you, or the horrors of Arkham night. You'd already picked your poison, now it was time to swallow.
You took a breath in, then out, and continued walking. You were almost there.
The streets of Gotham stretched on endlessly, a cacophony of fear.
Just a bit longer.
A gunshot sounded nearby, the noise blasting through your eardrum.
Almost there.
The hum of a van's engine rushed through the night, haunting laughter echoing through the road.
You could see your house!
You beamed, a smile lighting up your face, as you practically skipped up to the entrance. You reached into your bag to withdraw your keys.
You had just retrieved them when a crowbar smashed into your head.
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Wow umh, please pray for reader guys, this is NOT going well for them. Who do you think that was?
Me writing shenanigans for this chapter:
I just really feel like reader should smash open this window, let's do it. Wait. They wouldn't have doors that work like that. so reader sadly puts the heavy object down :(
Also me: yeah so reader lies here and it's an absolute mess
Also also me: rip reader that's a lotta head trauma omg
Sorry for the lack of soul animals this chapter :(( there's a reason I swear
The next chapter is definitely gonna be a bit insane, for sure! The soul animals return then anddd in droves!
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If I missed anyone out im super sorry! I generally check the replies for the current chapter and messages for people that want to be tagged, so it's possible for people to slip by
Just remind me again and I'll be sure to add you! (This also goes for if I misspell you accidentally, which also happens cuz I type them all manually)
For some reason I couldnt tag anymore people until I put a random space in-between the tags, so that's apparently a thing. If anyone has any ideas why, I'm listening
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balkanradfem · 3 months ago
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So I've found Alyssa Grenfell on youtube. She shares her experience of leaving mormonism, and the inner workings of the religion. I had very little ideas about what mormonism is, only that it's a high-control religion, very difficult to leave, and has people knocking on doors trying to get converts. I've been interested to find out more, and I ended up watching almost all of her content, and some of the information I've got from it opened my eyes on other feminist topics, and I believe is relevant to the current discourse!
So if you, like me, don't know how mormonism works, it started when a guy decided that he too could be a part of the bible; he wrote a bible part two: mormon, and proclaimed himself a prophet. Then he started a religion based on his writings, decided it was more important than the bible itself because he 'translated it from gold tablets god gave him', and started gaining followers by convincing people he's the prophet. Once he had managed to get a following, he soon started to sexually exploit the wives and daughters of these followers, to the point where he had 20-40 wives and had married 14yo children. Families allowed it to happen because he would promise them to be royalty in the afterlife. He eventually got into a lot of trouble for stealing and raping children so he was killed by an angry mob, but the religion continued.
The religion is same as christianity except more rules (no coffee, no alcohol, no smoking), eternal worship of the predator who wrote it, followers are pressured to follow the rules exactly, and, the vital part, the followers have to give 10% of their income to the church. They developed a culture where once every young mormon kid comes of age, they have to go on a 'mission', which means they're removed from their home, and have to spend 2 years (1,5 for women) living in a foreign area, knocking on doors, sharing the gospel, trying to convert people. The conversion rate is extremely low, but at that point kids have invested so much time, effort, energy and passion for the religion, they become devoted to it and start to feel alienated in the world that rejects their religion. And even with the low conversion rate, every new convert means another continuous source of income for the church. So it's very profitable to send out young adults to make these sales. The kids are told that if they don't complete their missions, they will not be able to marry, and marriage is presented as their only life purpose.
So how rich is the church at this point? 230 billion dollars. I've been shocked to hear this because I had no idea. Alyssa explained that the mormon church is as rich as Pepsi, they have more money than Disney and McDonalds. So you might be wondering, like I did, well what are they doing with all that money? I've been left to wonder this for a while, until I watched the video called 'Why are so many influencers mormon?', which explained it. I didn't even realize a lot of influencers were mormon. But, this video showed me something both disturbing, and eye opening.
Before I go into that, I have to point out how patriarchal and misogynistic this religion is. Women are not given any options except marriage, and it's presented as the only righteous way to live. They're groomed for marriage from a very young age, encouraged to start writing letters to their future husbands at the age of 9. They're taught cooking, sewing and childcare, and to coddle any males in the family. It's taken for granted that m*n won't respect women, to the point where male children are allowed to harass grown women and their families will not intervene or consider it a problem. Chastity and purity are promoted to the level where members of the religion are expected to wear special underwear at all times, which hides their entire torso, shoulders, and legs down to their knees, and their clothing is expected to cover this up completely. They're rejected by the religion if they dare to have sex before marriage, or drink alcohol or coffee, or in some cases, tea. The church has a history of allowing and promoting polygamy, in the sense that a male was allowed to have as many wives as he wanted; they've since stopped this, but refused to break up the existing marriages. They're also promoting anti gay and racist propaganda, which Alyssa observed in school where she'd been teaching; a gay kid almost ended his life due to extreme homophobia.
I know all of this is somewhat common in all areas of society, all religions, and all cultures, but in mormonism it seems to be written into the core of it.
So now, why are so many influencers mormon? I didn't even know they were. The influencers themselves are not promoting the fact that they're mormon, nor does it come up in viral discussions. Ballerina farm is mormon. Tradwives are mormon. Whataboutaub, Rachel Parcel, brooklynandbailey, tanner_mann, thebucketlistfamily, Taylor Frankie Paul, Sarah Beeston, Ruby Franke, these are all mormon. Most of the Utah-based influencers are mormon, and there's a bigger amount of successful and popular influencers from Utah, than from LA or NY.
For me it immediately explained why this viral content is like that. Why we're having such influx of highly patriarchal, anti-feminist, very dangerous and sexist content, put in front of the eyes of young women. Why it's being promoted as an ideal way of life. How are these women able to share this life as if they truly believed it was good and ideal. How could they think it's harmless? If they're using the internet to the extent that they're creating content, how would they not be exposed to any feminism at all? And they wouldn't because it's against their religion to engage with content like that, or with people talking about it. Because being raised in a high-control religion, they would truly believe their lives are the ideal. They would be presented with it as their only option, the only way of life possible for a woman.
It's heartbreaking because I can now understand why it was so easy to push Ballerina Farm to give up her entire life ambition to get married and carry children for a male she didn't even want to go out with, the pressure from the religion to do so would be immense, she would have been raised to see this as the only option, everything else in her life would be considered pointless. She wouldn't have an actual choice, she'd be groomed for this from the moment she was born. Mormons don't advertise 'looking for your soulmate', they only instruct women to marry a mormon male who completed his mission and make it work.
So how does the immensely rich mormon church play into this? I couldn't see it until Alyssa explained in a very detailed way how youtube content advertising works. I didn't know about this either, but here's the overview:
How much you get paid on youtube, instagram, tik-tok, or other online content platform, depends on what type of content it is, based on how much advertisers are willing to pay to put adverts on it. For instance, you get paid much more for finance content, because banks will pay premium prices to be advertised in a finance-related video. If you're making content on cooking, you get paid way less, because it's not such a lucrative field. If you're making content on christianity, you get similarly low price as for cooking, christian church is not that rich. But, if you're making content as a mormon, that's showcasing some aspect of a mormon life, even if you don't specifically say you're mormon, the price goes way up, to the point where it's as lucrative as finance. The mormon church is making sure that the mormon influencers are being paid premium prices for their content, because people who get massively interested in the influencers, eventually find out that it's the mormon life being advertised, and some of them consider taking on mormonism. Which gives church more converts, which means the church will earn more money. The content we're watching is one huge advert sponspored by mormon church, and we don't even know it.
Alyssa figured this out because her content falls under the keyword 'mormon', and her comments warned her that the church is advertising on her videos, even when she's making mormon-critical content. She then realized that she too was being paid a premium price for her views, just because they're mormon themed. She went on to discover that even just being an influencer in Utah will fetch a premium price, because most of mormons are based in Utah. For more detailed and comprehensive explanation on this, watch her video!
Advertising is not the only way the mormon church is spending their money, they've also built a shopping mall, and are basically spending their money by investing and gambling and everything any corporation does with their profits. It's making me mad, and also makes the members of the church mad when they discover where 10% of their income goes, because they're told it's being used for charity and community service, and not advertisments and building malls.
For me this solves a mystery of how is it possible, in this day and age to have such influx of tradwives and influencers of 'traditional life', they're being sponsored by an organization making a profit off of it, making sure that anyone making this content is so well paid, they're able to live off of it, and keep creating more of it, and in the process of doing that, groom young women into their lifestyle.
Learning more about religions, specifically high-control religions, makes me realize just how much of it is happening all around us, but invisible, not naming what it is. It's similar to MLM's, the people inside are constantly trying to lure more people in, to make profit for those on the top, while the organization keeps changing names and hides their business structure in order to save their reputation. People can get influenced by it, and sucked in, without even knowing about it. Somehow most MLM's are also in Utah.
Mormon church also asked to no longer be called that, in order to stop being associated with the words like 'cult', which people have identified it as. Now they're working under more secretive names, and hidden business practices, so we wouldn't even know what we're being influenced by, and why is the content in front of us what it is.    
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mininiamh · 10 days ago
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never again | cs55
pairing: carlos sainz x norris!reader
scenario: dealing with the aftermath of your break up you come to the conclusion that some things just aren't meant to be
warning(s): fluff (we love big bro lando), a whole lot of angst, age gap (reader is 20, carlos is 30)
a/n: okay so I was asked to do a part 2 of this drabble by @ernegren. the public asked, i delivered
MASTERLIST
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The white noise inside your head was enough to muffle the world around you, sounding like you were submerged under water. There was something on the TV but what it was you couldn't be sure of, only the fact that is something Lando had chosen. The coffee in your hands had gone cold by now as the only thing in your mind was the last time you saw Carlos on loop.
You felt like an idiot really. Part of you had known that things with Carlos were too good to be true. He had been attentive, caring, always leading his ear when you needed to have a rant about something that had annoyed you to no end. For once you believed you had something pure and beautiful with him, however, everything the two of you had built had begun to fracture and crumble when Lando had told the very things that caused your doubt to spring to the surface.
You didn't know where he had heard it, and, to be fair, you didn't care. Just that one sentence had invaded your thoughts for a week since then. I heard Carlos was in a bet, he had said, rumour is that it involved dating you.
Your heart broke at that moment. It still does when you think about it, but you didn't want to believe him. You brushed your brother to the side and chose the man suspected to only be with you for six months because of a bet. Oh, how stupid you felt now, legs tucked underneath you on his couch with a mug of cold coffee in your hands. You had grovelled and apologised profusely for not believing him, but Lando just ignored your consistent string of apologies and brought you into his apartment.
Lando glanced over at you as the credits rolled. He sighed as he saw the far-off look in your eye, biting the inside of your cheek as your fingers tightened around the mug. “You gonna drink that?”
“Huh?” You blinked before finding Lando's concerned gaze on you. You hated that look. He always gave you the same look whenever something didn't plan out as you had hoped.
“I said ‘you gonna drink that'?” Lando leant forward to grab his own coffee mug from the table. “I'd imagine it's stone cold by now.”
You sat back against the cushions, taking a sip of your coffee as you did before grimacing at the coldness. Lando shook his head before taking the mug from your hands and disappearing into the kitchen. You tipped your head back against and stared up at the ceiling while listening to Lando move about the kitchen with ease. But even focusing on something as simple as breathing couldn't erase the emotional pain.
It was three days after Lando had told you about the alleged bet that the insecurities began to run rampant. The second guessing, the fear of not being enough. You had confronted Carlos about the allegation the day before you walked out, but he had insisted it was just people stirring the pot and trying to cause drama. You should've left then, should've walked out days before and never looked back, but you didn't. Instead, you chose to stick around and now with a confession from the man you loved, you were struggling.
Your phone buzzed on the coffee table, drawing your attention back to the present. You had your suspicions who it was from, but you couldn't bring yourself to find out if you were right. Another buzz, another text. Why couldn't he just take a hint already?
“Is that him?” Lando returned with two steaming mugs of coffee and placed them on the coffee table. “I swear to God-”
“Lando, just leave it,” you sighed as you shifted your position to get more comfortable. “Nothing you do or say can change the fact I was nothing but a bet.”
Lando scooted closer to you and wrapped his arm around your shoulders. You lean against him, your body exhausted from the emotional toll of the last few days. You couldn't ask your brother to stop talking with Carlos. It wouldn't be fair as the two were still rather close despite everything. He kissed your temple as the two of you settled on the couch.
“You know, Oscar's got a thing for you.”
“Lando!”
♡☆♡
Mexico was warm. Warmer than what you remember from the last time you visited the country, but Mexico City was one of your favourite cities in the world. Mexican culture was something you could fully embrace from the vibrant colours that adorned the city to the rich food and spices. You loved everything about it.
You stood off to the side while Lando was wrapped up in the media circus of the weekend. Your eyes followed his every move while you waited for the perfect moment for the two of you to slip back in the McLaren hospitality suite, safely tucked away from the media for a short while before Lando was needed again.
He had given you the option of staying in his driver's room so you could avoid crossing paths with Carlos. However, it wouldn't do you any good staying locked away on your own. The media had already caught wind of your break up with Carlos, and you being absent in the paddock after seeing you arrive with your brother would only add fuel to their fire.
Lando glanced in your direction and gave you a reassuring smile, which prompted you to shoot one right back at him. But that piece didn't last for much longer.
“y/n?”
You breathed sharply as your body tensed. You knew it was possible, running into him, but you didn't expect it so soon.
You turned your head to face him, catching his gaze in the light of the warm Mexican sun. He had barely changed, still looked as irresistible as ever, though the dark circles under his eyes told a story of lack of sleep. Part of you felt a twisted sense of satisfaction that he was losing sleep but the other part was concerned; he couldn't afford to lose sleep driving at over 300 kilometres per hour, it's dangerous for him and the other drivers.
The air was thick between you. You didn't know what you were supposed to do. What does one do or say around the man who had ripped out your heart and trampled all over it?
“Carlos,” you sighed. You brushed some hair back behind your ear as you turned your gaze back to Lando. “What do you want?”
Carlos winced at your tone, but then again, he didn't expect anything less. Not after how things ended with you packing your bag and walking out without looking back. “How are you?”
“How do you think I am?” You snapped before whipping around to face him. “How do you think I'm doing after finding out I was a bet amongst friends?”
“I'm sorry, okay, I never meant for things to get that far. I never meant for you to fall in love. Hell, I never meant to care about you as much as I did, as much as I still do.” Carlos ran his fingers through his hair, tugging at the roots in visible distress. “Can we at least talk?”
You let out a bitter laugh at the audacity. “What is there to talk about? You lied, and you lied, and you lied for months, and even when I brought it to your attention, you still had the nerve to tell me it's just people stirring shit up.” You shook your head at the absurdity of it all, wanting more of your time as if he hadn't wasted enough.
“Please, y/n, let's just-”
“No, we're not going to ‘just’ anything.” Your eyes were ablaze as you stared into him as if you were staring into his soul. “I was such a fucking idiot for believing in you, for believing what we had was real.”
“It was real, and I was an idiot. I never should've taken the bet.” Carlos inched forward, his hand hovering beside your face as if waiting for you to pull back. When you didn't move, he cupped your face, his thumb caressing your skin with the same tenderness he always had. “But the more time I spent with you, the more I got to know you, it became harder and harder to tell you and I'm so sorry, amour, I never meant for you to get hurt.”
For a moment, you allowed yourself to fall back into him. You leaned into his touch, savouring the way his skin felt against yours, adoring the way you felt safe again, even for just a brief moment. You always did feel safe around him, even before you got together. He just had the safety aura about him like nothing could harm you when he was around. Oh, if only you knew how it would all come crashing down on a moment's notice.
You swallowed as you glanced up, your eyes glittering with unshed tears, and it was like a punch to his gut all over again. “Did you ever love me?”
“Of course I did, amour,” his tone almost pleading with you as he moved his free hand to cradle the other side of your face and rested his forehead against yours. “I fell in love with how you loved to watch the sunrise every morning, I fell in love with the way your hand fits perfectly in mine; I fell in love with you a little bit more everyday.”
You closed your eyes as you lent further into his touch. His words did ease a small amount of pain in your heart, but it wasn't enough. The damage had already been done, and you didn't know if that could be repaired.
“That's the problem,” you whispered, your eyes opening again and glistening with unshed tears. “You've lied so many times, I don't even know if you're telling the truth. I've been cheated on in the past, and that hurt, but that's nothing compared to this.”
“Cariño, please, don't do this,” Carlos begged as tears of his own began to build. “I'll do whatever it takes, name it, and I'll do it, but please don't walk away.”
“You can make up for it by not making the same mistake with the next girl.” You gently pulled his hands away from your face and held them tightly in your own. You still loved him, of course you did, but you couldn't allow yourself to make the same mistake again. “If you're really sorry for what happened, promise me that the next girl you meet that you'll treat her with the respect and dignity she deserves.”
Carlos let the tear fall as he drew a shaky breath. You reached up and brushed it away with the pad of your thumb, your heart crushed by the weight of everything. He knew in that very moment he had lost you for good. He had messed up beyond belief, and now he was suffering the consequences of his careless actions.
He held your hand against his cheek and kissed your palm as another tear threatened to fall. “Promise me you'll take care of yourself, okay?”
You nodded as you tried to keep in your emotions. “I promise,” you said with a weak smile. You reached up on your tiptoes and pressed your lips to his cheek, lingering for a moment longer than necessary. “Goodbye, Carlos.”
You pulled away from him entirely and turned on your heel as you moved on. The heartache had crushed you, a pain you had never thought you'd experience at the hands of Carlos, but sometimes things don't plan out the way people hoped, and this was one of those things.
Lando was stood by the media pen, having wrapped up the interviews not too long ago. He didn't say anything. He didn't need to as he could see the conflicting emotions in your eyes. He just silently pulled you into his arms and tucked your head under his chin.
You'd be okay, you know you would. This was just a hard lesson learnt.
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slushycoookie · 9 months ago
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My Husband Has a Symbiote! Pt. 2
Pt.1 - Pt.2
Relationship: Symbiote! Miguel O'Hara x AFAB! Reader
Word Count: 2.8k
Content: Smut, p in v, vaginal fingering, Miguel gets choked, Reader can't go ten minutes without being railed, MINORS DNI!
Summary: You try to have a serious conversation about the symbiote Miguel has, but it doesn't really work.
A/N: I'm having so much fun with this, don't mind me. Also, you guys really liked the first part, so here's some more!
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After the most wonderful sex you had in your life, you had to get a grip.
It couldn't happen again. Having sex with an alien that your husband bonded with. You were still trying to understand why using a symbiote was the best action out of everything else. You all could try the normal way. Without taking extreme measures. Or, in your case, out-of-this-world ones. That's what you decided to do getting up this morning.
You took your time putting on clothes, your legs wobbling as you stood. You smelled the strong scent of coffee while traversing to the kitchen. Only to get a view of your husband's gorgeous back. 
“Good morning.” Miguel handed you a cup of coffee as a peace offering. As you took it, you tried not to get distracted by his hairy chest and arms. Or how his sweatpants hung low around his waist. 
“Good morning.” You smiled against your cup, “Sleep well?”
He nodded, matching your smile. “Did you?”
“Yeah.” Your eyes darted around his form. No clear view of his new symbiote. Unless he put it in a bottle. “Where is it? Or them?”
Miguel rubbed the back of his neck, “They're still here.” Just then, his new best friend appeared. Only its head, sporting your partner's signature blue and red colors. Its smile and tongue gave you flashbacks of how that was on your lower half last night. Taking exceptionally good care of you. You squeezed your thighs again to ignore the arousal.
“Pretty thing.” A weird form of greeting they uttered before disappearing.
“We should definitely talk about that. In-depth.” You settled your cup down.
Miguel did the same, standing beside you. “What's more to talk about? I told you why I got one.”
“And I understood that.” You sighed, “But that can't happen again. We should try like normal people. Go see a doctor, try more sex positions…”
He chuckled, wrapping an arm around your waist and holding you close. “We're not normal people.”
“I know.” You let out a slight laugh, “But I think it's best to-”
“Did you not enjoy last night?” 
Your heartbeat picked up. His eyes were lowered, gazing at you with an emotion you knew all too well. It didn't help that he smelled so good. Hints of ginger mixed with the fresh coffee hugged your senses. Or the way his rugged arms held you up last night while thrusting into you. “I did-”
He stole a kiss. Stopping you from regretting anything that occurred last night. You started making out in the kitchen, absorbed in the bitter coffee taste. Which somehow turned into you getting destroyed from behind. Miguel's symbiote form pressed against your back, body rutting into you. His ginormous hands covered the countertops. Little cracks formed with each thrust he took. You couldn't be upset about the destruction of your kitchen. You didn't want him to stop.
“You deserve to have our children…” That deep voice resonated in the room, causing you to shiver. 
“Don’t say that…” You whimpered, pressing your ass back against him. A territorial growl emitted from behind and he went harder. Pounding into you until you screamed his name.
Everything was a mess. 
The countertops were damaged, coffee spilled on the floor along with the broken pieces from your mugs. And a sticky, warm substance was sliding down your thighs. Miguel’s normal hand reached down and scooped up whatever was coming out. Pushing it back in to make sure it didn't go to waste. All while he kissed your head.
You couldn't even talk to him about the symbiote in the room. Whenever you tried to bring up getting rid of it, somehow you were on your back, side, bent over or on top. Taking your partner's cock like a champ. Getting full of his seed. And at the end of it, feeling completely satisfied. 
You ranted to MJ and Jess when you all went out for lunch at a café. It's been a week of Miguel using you like his own sex toy.
“All I heard is that you've been getting some.” Jess remarked while sipping on her drink. “And you're complaining about it.”
“Because he's distracting me! So I don't tell him to get rid of it!” You buried your face in your hands.
“Well…how big is it?” Mj asked, eyes wide with genuine curiosity. 
You raised a brow as your cheeks turned dark. “I shouldn't tell you that.”
“You look the way you did when you came back from your honeymoon.” Jess noticed your body practically glowing from all the sex you were having. “We gotta know how good it is.”
The table they were sitting at was rectangular in shape. Long enough for you to show them how big Miguel was with his symbiote. Which was almost half of the table. 
“Whoa.” Mj gawked at the description. “And tell me why you're complaining again.”
You rolled your eyes, “Symbiotes are dangerous! I don't want him to get obsessed with it all because of a problem I have.” You turned to Jess, “Shouldn't you be agreeing with me here? Didn't you have a symbiote?”
Jess waved you away, “No, because I'm too smart not to put myself through that.” You purse your lips as the Spider-Woman kept going. “They are dangerous, but only if they don't have a decent relationship with who they're attached to.”
“Yeah, Peter was very different when he had it.” Mj explained, twirling her drink around with a straw. “First he was energized and then snippy. He couldn’t part with it until he had a wake-up call that it was destroying our relationship. It was scary.”
That's what you were worried about. Your partner turning into someone you couldn't recognize. You weren't scared of him but for him.
“You know you can say no, right?” Jess said before getting a mischievous glint in her eye. “But you don't want to. The sex is that good, huh?”
You gasped at her accusation, “You are…absolutely right.” Your friends sympathized with you, “But we need to talk…”
You had to come up with a plan. A way so you could talk without having his cock buried inside you. You decided to visit him at HQ, trying to look as unattractive as possible with a hoodie and sweatpants. Being married to the leader of Spider Society had its perks. One of them was looking into mission distribution. You noticed the teen dream, which you called Miles, Gwen, Pavitr, Hobie, and Margo, going to report to Miguel that day. You couldn't barge in when he spoke to Peter. He'd have Mayday with him, adding more fuel to the fire. Or any reports with Ben because Miguel would get jealous and sex would ensue. A bunch of teens on the other hand was perfect.
You approached the group as they were about to make their way into his lab.
“Hey!” Miles greeted with open arms, “What brings you here?”
“Oh, I need to talk to Miguel about something.” You waved it off, not deeming it as important. 
“Trouble in paradise?” Hobie said with a smirk, causing you to shake your head.
“No, no. It's just about the symbiote. You guys think it's weird, right? That he's using it?”
“Actually,” Gwen took over, “some of our people have had success stories in using it. Like me, for example.”
You stared at the girl, surprised. “What? You had a good relationship with one of those things?”
“Yeah. It's no big deal.” Gwen shrugged it off. The entire time they were slowly making their way inside his lab. Going past his equipment in the darkness.
Pavitr jumped on her back, “She says it's no big deal. Like a boss.”
“That's Gwendy for ya.” Hobie winked at her.
“Guys, it really isn't a big deal. Symbiote relationships can be symbiotic. It depends on the person and who they connect with. It could make them better or worse.” 
Everyone blinked at Gwen's explanation. Your knowledge of her connection with the alien made you pause. Was it possible for Miguel to have a healthy relationship with the thing? Were you stressing yourself out worrying about him?
“Miguel has been getting better lately.” Miles cut in.
“Yeah, at first he was moody, but then he gave me the day off so I could play a new game that came out.” Margo added. “He never lets me take the day off for video games.”
You hummed. Sure, his mood was getting better, but they still had to talk. You didn't want to assume everything was okay until they at least spoke about it.
Inside the lab, the teens gave their report to Miguel. The entire time he stood high on his platform, nodding to everything they were saying. Once in a while, he’d glance at you, a trace of intrigue, like he wanted to talk. Or breed you before getting back to work. You couldn’t relax seeing him in his typical suit. The symbiote was still attached to him, just not present. 
“Good work.” Miguel complimented, “Now, my partner needs to speak to me about something.”
You perked up, shaking your head. “They can stay, it’s not that important-”
“I’d rather they didn’t.” His stare shot through your body. It was hard but yet filled with increasing lust. All you did was walk in the room. 
The teens walked past you, shooting apologizing looks. Hobie’s face was amused, giving a reassuring pat on the back before whispering in your ear. “Don’t rough ‘im up too much.”
Miguel called you to his platform. You made your way across, trying to devise a quick game plan as your current one backfired. You placed yourself on the other side to create as much distance as possible. You heard him command Lyla to lock the lab so no one could get in. You took a deep breath to stabilize your beating heart. 
“Why are you over there?”
You shot him a glare, “You know why.”
“Do I?” Miguel tilted his head in question. A rumbling chuckle filled your body when you tsked. He stood on the other end, not making any moves to get closer. Yet his eyes were trailing down your covered body. Picturing himself peeling every layer off of you. “I like your outfit today.”
You saw him take one step closer and you had to straighten yourself. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” Another step and you cleared your throat. You could see yourself being bent over that console if the conversation kept up like this. 
“Look, we really need to talk about this symbiote.” Miguel hummed, partially listening. As he took another step, you pressed yourself back against the console. Realizing you couldn’t get further back, you raised a harsh pointer finger towards him. “Miguel.”
“I’m listening, preciosa.” He paused, that same look of hunger in his eyes. 
“Are you? Do you see yourself right now?” You watched him take another step. 
Miguel snorted, “Do you see yourself right now? You’re so sexy. I can’t believe I married you.” 
He closed the gap, one hand on the console behind you. You placed your hands on his chest. At first, it was to try to create some distance, but the hardened muscle under your palms made you reconsider. Those same pectorals you've always felt and pressed up against. Your hands had a mind of their own, running along them. The corner of Miguel’s lips curled up in amusement. 
“You still wanna talk?” He picked you up and placed you on the console. His other hand placed against your lower back, pressing your entire body against his chest. Your resolve was dwindling as he gazed at you. “Or do you want to be bred?”
That’s how you ended up the way you were now. Clothes removed, thrown who knows where in his lab. Legs spread while his gigantic finger pumped into and out of you. Miguel’s symbiote form took over, drooling while watching you take him in easily. You whined while clutching his arm. Small sopping sounds fill your ears. 
A gasp escaped your lips when a second digit entered you. Your back arching at the beautiful friction. How his fingers knew where to touch inside. A satisfied growl erupted from Miguel, mouth wide as his tongue glided across your pleasure-fixed face. 
“Pretty thing. So obedient…” His thumb pressed against your clit. Your nails dug into his sticky skin at the additional sensation. Not wanting him to stop for a second as that familiar burning feeling started to rise. It pooled in your stomach before spreading up and over your body. Miguel didn’t care when you screamed for him in his lab, letting all the spiders know he was pleasing his partner. 
You panted, leaning back a little on the console when his fingers were gone. The familiar sight of his large cock came into view, ready to go in. A rush of clarity filled your mind as you stopped him. He gave you a look in question.
“Lemme be on top.”
Miguel grinned, eyes lighting up with intrigue. “Oh? Pretty little thing wants to bounce?” 
Before you could nod in confirmation, he sat down. Back pressed along the console. Goosebumps formed, feeling the cool steel amongst your feet. You licked your lips, watching your partner observe you. Dark blue cock aching to be inside. You hovered over him, stabilizing yourself by touching his shoulders. Before sinking down. 
Each time Miguel’s cock entered you, it was always as if it was the first time. After a couple of thrusts, You always lost your ability to think straight. Only taking what Miguel gave you. This time was going to be different. 
A moan escaped you, getting used to the feeling before raising your hips again. Before slamming back down on him. His eyes lowered at the sight of his partner fucking yourself on his shaft. Even though Miguel took over most of the time during sex, You had your moments of being the one to make him quiver under your touch. While fucking the symbiote, it was still affected by things that made regular Miguel whine. So you went slow, sliding up and down at an antagonizing pace. Even for you. But you needed to get your point across. Miguel’s hands hovered by your hips, ready to have you pick up the pace. Only for you to use one hand to grip his thick throat. 
His eyes went wide at the sudden action, your tiny hand doing your best to choke him out. “Pretty thing wants to get rough?”
“You like it rough.” You quipped back, still rolling your hips on him. Miguel growled at the sensation before latching his hand on his arm.
“We do.”
It happened in an instant, the symbiote tendrils curling around the lower half of your arm, coating it the signature blue. You felt stronger. Enough to grip his neck tighter. You also picked up the pace, bouncing in a way to drive him crazy. If you could see Miguel’s face, you knew his eyes would be rolled back, while his hips thrusted up in unison with your bounces. 
“L-Let me…speak to him…”
“You are.” The symbiote’s chest heaved, almost succumbing to the intoxicating sensation. 
You shook your head, a whimper coming out as you hit a spot that was too good. “No. I wanna…see him…” Miguel’s face appeared, pleasure permeating his dazed face. If there were any other moment, you wouldn’t stop, help him chase his fucked out high. But not right now. You slowed down, earning a cry from Miguel. 
“N-No. Don’t stop, mi amor.” 
“Listen to me first…” Your pace was torture as you sunk down enough to provide pleasure still. In this position, Miguel was susceptible to agree to anything as long as he made sure he released inside you. “We’re gonna have a conversation about this thing.”
“Okay, okay. We will. Now let’s-” A strangled moan escaped him when you squeezed his neck.
“I’m serious, Miguel. If we end up like this again without talking, you’re not coming back home.” You stared right into his eyes, serious while clouded with pleasure. Miguel stared right back, taking in that you meant every word. You didn’t like it had to come to this, but it would put you at ease if you two talked about it. 
He nodded, taking your words to heart. “Okay.”
With that, your pace picked up again. You bounced on his cock with vigor, hand removed from his throat and back to his shoulders. Miguel’s hands were on your hips as he fucked up into you to meet your own. Both were extraordinarily loud in the lab. Neither cared as they went to chase the high together. A mix of grunts and moans spread amongst the atmosphere. 
Then, a comfortable silence took its place.
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livinggxd3adgirl · 2 months ago
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synopsis— this is a part 2 of “what’s that supposed to mean?”
a/n— I did not expect so many people to like the first part and want a 2nd part .I thought it was going to going to flop. But thank you guys sm! As always there may be errors so pls forgive me. Likes and reblogs are always greatly appreciated!
It had been about 2 weeks since you left gojo. You had been staying at his best friends, geto’s house. You were wearing getos clothes nice all of your was at your apartment that gojo is currently living in. Gojo had called you a few times, but you never answered. You weren’t sure what he wanted with you, but frankly, you didn't care what he had to say. You sat on the sugurus couch. The house filled with silence. All you could hear was the sound of your beating heart. Your mind ran through what happened that night over and over again until you couldn't even remember your own name.
you were snapped out of your thoughts about gojo when you heard the door click open and getos soft voice. "Hey .. im back, I brought us some food. " Geto had been trying to comfort you with all your favorite foods and just be by your side during this hard time.
"Thanks, suguru.. really, " you gave him a weak smile. Suguru set down his keys before he set the bag of food down on the coffee table in front of you.
"Listen.. I know that you're still heart broken about gojo and all, but he's coming here later. He said he wanted to talk to me about something. " he sounded reluctant to tell you that Gojo was coming and for good reason.
You nod your head as he spoke. He sucked in a deep breath before you spoke. Your throat was itchy because of all the crying you have been doing for the past 2 weeks. "I understand geto, ill leave after I eat." Your weak smile pulled at Geto's heart strings. He truly couldn't reason why he even let you stay so long. Geto felt bad for you, of course, but there was something else he felt for you, but he just couldn't understand what it was.
Before geto could stop himself, he quickly spoke, "You dont have to leave, sweetheart..." he gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. "You can stay in my bedroom while he's here. I can't fathom letting that idiot drive you out of here, too. " You finally let out a real smile as you sniffle. For the first time in 2 weeks, you felt like you finally had someone that was on your side.
"Should we eat?" You ask whike smiling. Geto, let's go of your hand as he starts working the bag open.
2 HOURS LATER
You and geto had eaten and watched movies for a while before gojo texted suguru he was in his way. "Stay here, sweetheart. I'll come get you myself, " Geto reassured you as he gave your shoulder a soft squeeze.
"I'll be here waiting.. and geto thank you, really I'm very grateful for everything you have done for me. " Geto couldn't fathom how stupid Gojo was for letting someone like you out of his sight. God, if you were his, he would never let you leave his apartment.
Sugurus train of thought was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell ringing. He quickly said his goodbyes and answered his front door.
You sat on Getos bed and stared at the closed bedroom door. The mere thought of gojo being just a few feet away from you made you want to throw up. As time passed, it felt like hours, but in reality, it had only been a few minutes.
Your thoughts were interrupted when you heard gojo and getos' voice gradually get closer and closer to the door. You can hear geto say "cmon dude don't go in there really just go wait in the living room ill get it for you".
Before Geto could even stop him, Gojo flung the door open. His eyes immediately widen as he sees you sitting comfortably on Sugurus bed.
"what the fuck are you doing here?"
edit!: prt 3
tags!! @ourfinalisation @96jnie @qashmer @sugurugirlie @gollumsmygel @ritzes28
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vanesycho · 2 months ago
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Summary:Renting a boyfriend? It was the stupidest idea in the world according to you, but what will you do when you get used to him and want to see him again?
wc:2,08k
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"No way! Have you lost your mind?"
You backed away as your friend tried to pull you inside. "Come on, it'll be good for you too."
"Buying a boyfriend? I don't think so." Your friend knew that you were sitting at home all the time and not doing any activities lately, you didn't even spend time with her and she thought that at least by having a man in your life, things would change. "If you don't want to then you never do it again, just for 2 hours? Pleaseee."
You let out a deep breath and let her pull you in, your friend smiling with victory. When you entered, you looked around in surprise as you saw that the place was crowded. A couple passed by, you guessed that the man was someone who worked here. "Come on, I registered for you and...Nakamoto Yuta? He'll be your boyfriend today." After your friend's sentence, she winked and tried to find Yuta among the other men working, even the idea of being alone with a man you didn't know for 2 hours was very scary.
"Oh! Here he is." You looked at your friend as she brought a black and long-haired figure with her. He smiled at you softly, walked over to you and leaned in, you stepped back a little. “Y/n. So I’ll be with you today?” You turned your head and looked for your friend and saw that she was already heading towards the exit of the store. She gave you a quick air kiss and disappeared. Did she leave you here alone with him? You quickly turned to the Yuta. "Two.We'll only be together for two hours."
He held your hand and started to lead you towards the exit. "There's no point in waiting then if it's two hours." You pulled your hand away from him and he turned to you, trying to figure out what was wrong. "Who told you to hold my hand?" He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and waved it in front of your face. "Rules?"
You frowned. “Did you really not read the rules?” He handed you the paper, you took it and looked over the rules.
Welcome to the boyfriend store! Here are the rules for you;
-Holding hands and hugging are mandatory. (We care about the customers' request, if you are not interested in skin contact we recommend you to choose men who are interested in this)
-Satisfaction of some sexual desires and wishes (upon request, not mandatory)
Our only wish is that you do not feel lonely and have a good time with your boyfriend, even if only for a few hours.Thank you for choosing us!
And there was some contact information at the bottom, you looked up at him, he was waiting for a reaction from you, you handed the paper to him. "Well, you better not get too close though." He nodded in agreement and extended his hand, you took it and walked out of the store.
While walking down the alley, Yuta saw a cafe. “Would you like to go in?” You knew there was nothing else to do so you agreed. Yuta ordered your coffee for you, you mumbled a small 'thank you' when he handed it to you.
"What made you want to do this? Do you really have fun doing this job?" He took a sip of his drink. “We don’t really talk about that kind of stuff, but you’re obviously not interested in it either, so I’ll answer. No. But this is the best paying job, and I have to support my home, myself, I have to work here at least for a short time." You hummed. Think about how hard it is to work in a place you don't want to and have to be close to all these people. "Anyway, let's not talk about that, your friend seemed more interested than you."
You laughed, he looked at your face carefully, leaned his elbow on the table, put his head in his palm and looked at you. You cleared your throat with a fake cough as his full attention was on you, his eye contact was definitely good, no wonder he chose this job.If you didn't know better, you'd think he was working on this job on purpose. "Yeah, she was always saying that I was shutting myself up in the house and refusing to socialize, that if I had a man in my life, at least I would feel good about myself."
"Well, she's not lying." you were drinking your coffee without an answer, you didn't even know how to talk to a guy, no wonder you haven't had a boyfriend for so long, you've always had problems with communicating. "I got some information about you. You like taking photos?"
You nodded in affirmation. "Yes, I am not a professional photographer, unfortunately I do not have a proper camera, but I still love it, I often go for a walk in nature by myself and I take very nice photos from there." He smiled at how relaxed and happy you looked when you talked about your hobby. You stopped in embarrassment when you noticed his smile. "I'm sorry I talked too much."
Still smiling, he said, "No, I like this, please continue." You pressed your lips together, his attention wasn't leaving you, you were usually the listener and now it was the other way around, making you a little nervous. "So...as I said, I live on the street and it makes a lot of noise, I like nature and quiet places more, I hope one day I can move to a place like that and take more pictures of the beauty."
"I'm sure you will." He opened the bag he was carrying with him, you watched him with curiosity, you looked at the camera with surprise when he took out. "Oh that's what I was talking about, I've been saving money for this for a long time." He chuckled at how excited you were, handing the camera to you. "Would you like to try it?"
"Really?" He stood up and sat on the chair next to you. You took the camera in his hand and examined it. You were a little confused by the number of buttons. He smiled and put his hand on your hand that was holding the camera. "Let me show you.." He turned on the camera. "If you press this button for a long time, it will switch to video mode, this button will show the photos you have taken before, and if you press this button once, it will take a photo."
You tried to listen to him carefully but the scent of his perfume was distracting you as he was so close to you, he was almost hugging you while holding the camera by your shoulder with one hand,It felt weird to feel his breath on your neck and face every time he spoke. "Hey, are you okay? You got lost in thought."
"Huh what?" You turned to him, but you had forgotten how close your faces were for a moment, and when your noses touched, you quickly turned back. "I'm fine yes, sorry." He smiled at your reaction, thought it was cute, and put the camera in front of you. "Keep this for the rest of our time together, take pictures of anything you want and I'll print them and give them to you."
You turned to him excitedly, "Really? Thank you so much." he stood up "Come on, I know a nice place." You stood up without hesitation, Yuta went to pay for the coffees, even though you denied it, he didn't seem to be listening to you much, so you lost to him.
After walking for a while, you arrived at a park, mostly covered with trees, and you saw a lake, you talked while looking at the beauty of the environment. "I've heard a lot about this place but I never had the time to go." He clasped your hands together, you turned to him with the sudden warmth you felt. When you saw that he wasn't looking at you, you turned back to the front in shame. 'This is his job Y/n, these are normal things for him of course.' You got caught up in the moment and forgot that you would only be together for two hours.
You walked towards the lake, taking a deep breath as a few birds gathered around, smiling slightly as the scent of flowers filled your nose. But the sound of a camera behind you made you turn around quickly, Yuta was smiling at you with his camera in his hand. "You looked beautiful, I didn't want to miss it."
He came over and handed it to you, you took the camera as you smiled again, taking a few pictures of the beautiful view in front of you. Yuta came into view, his hands on the board in front of him as he looked around, you raised your camera again as you carefully looked at his side profile, taking a picture of him. The wind was caressing his long black hair, you continued to watch him as he closed his eyes, you swallowed hard, trying to come to your senses, in an hour there would be no one like him in your life. "Isn't it beautiful?"
You were pulled away from your thoughts by his voice and approached him. "Yes it is, no sound, no noise, just peace."
You continued to watch for a while, most of the time your mind was occupied with Yuta, you couldn't even look at the view in front of you properly.
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You spent a few minutes together and found yourself in front of the store again, your feet refusing to leave, you really couldn't have gotten used to him that quickly. You looked at the camera in your hand and handed it to him. "Thank you Yuta, I..I really had a good time."
He smiled "Keep the camera with you." You looked at him with your eyes wide in surprise, not knowing what to say. "What? No, I can't accept this."
He leaned in closer, tucking your hair behind your ear, you flinched when you felt his fingers. "Of course you can accept, take this as my thanks, I... This is the first time I've had a good time with someone." You refused to believe it, how many people did he go out with in a day and did he have fun with you?
You froze in place when you felt his lips on your forehead, a light, small kiss, the smile on his face didn't fade when he pulled back. "Thank you Y/n, take care of yourself and.. the camera too." He chuckled and you watched him walk into the store, you just stood there, not knowing how to react.
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When you got home you lay on your bed, stared at the ceiling, lost in thought. His face, his smile, his touch, his kiss, each one of them ran through your head like a film strip. You turned to the side, the camera was just there, you picked it up, looked through the photos that were taken before, you saw Yuta among a few landscape photos. He was perfect on camera but he was definitely better in real life, you went back to older photos, you didn't know if it would be right to look at them but your curiosity gave in.
You smiled when you saw a photo of him with a kitten. You looked at the smile on his face, you scrolled to the side. It was a picture of him lying on the grass, you looked at his hair, it was shorter than it is now and it was red, you thought how pretty he looked even with red hair.And the other photo looked more recent, he was in a studio or something, was he into music? Not knowing much about his normal life made you sad. You admitted to yourself that you wanted to talk more, you were used to it, unfortunately.
As you were about to take off your clothes, you noticed something in your pocket, you frowned, realizing it was a piece of paper. The paper on which the store had written the rules was "How did this get here?" You opened the paper, saw the contact information at the bottom, thought, should you go to him again?
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I'm thinking of writing another part of this, I'm not sure tho,if most people like it, I'll do it🤍🤍(and the photos above are the other photos on camera)
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jesswritesthat · 3 months ago
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Tsukishima Kei: Dog Damn
Fandom: Haikyuu!! — [ Masterlist ]
Summary: ~1.8k, fluff
• Tsukishima and his canine give a whole new meaning to how dogs take after their owners.
Warnings: Timeskip spoilers, 2 curses
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There's that saying of how dogs take after their owners, it was one Tsukishima would always scoff at. Even when he found this yappy puppy alone in the rain for the second day in a row with only a cardboard box labelled 'Please Adopt Me' and reluctantly gave in.
That's how that dumb saying came to light, the fluffy thing growled and yapped at his older brother when he became annoying. When his Karasuno teammates heard about the adoption they wanted to meet the fellow, only for him to be particularly vocal around Hinata and Kageyama. Yamaguchi was probably one of the few the pup actually liked.
This enigma continued through to the Sendai Frogs, now bigger and older, his faithful companion reflected his feelings to individuals. Much like Tsukishima, the Shikoku grew to like individuals with time much like his owner, but there's always a fun exception. 
It came with a bark, one that was louder that most Keis' dog would express during their evening walk, and to his surprise it was directed toward you.
You who was merely writing the signage for the day outside of your coffee shop. Still, you didn't seem startled, while crouch you attempted to beckon the offender over but he merely growled in reply. His master seemed to laugh however, pulling down his headphones with a smirk.
"Nice try, it won't work though."
"Is that a challenge?" You stood to meet the smug smirking blonde, the dog a little more settled as his master conversed.
"He's stubborn."
"Ah a hunting breed. What's his name?" Came your observation, tilting your head at the canine which only snorted in reply.
"Rekkusu."
You paused for a moment, no doubt the man in question had intended for the delivery to be cool, but the ongoing silence made him shift uncomfortably with brows furrowing.
"As in Tyrannosaurus Rex?" You'd expectantly noted, crossing your arms with a bemused expression.
"Yeah, and what about it?" Tsukishima shot back, a mild glare in place but you only dismissed his attitude with a smile.
"It's cool, suits the little guy."
"Little guy? I suppose your lack of perception means your customers get better value for money."
"Why do you think we're so popular? See you around Rekkusu-chan and owner!" With a smirk you waved politely, before entering the coffee shop.
The notice of ‘All Dogs Welcome’ sign framed prominently in the window.
———
Now that you'd spoken, you noticed him nearly everyday, he followed the same route in the mornings and evenings with Rekkusu in tow. This morning you awaited his passing, racing out to stop him in his tracks with a greeting bark from the dog which left you glaring.
"Back for more?"
"I come baring gifts this time." Came your proud tone, placing a Puppuccino before the dog who arrogantly waited for you step back at least 4 paces prior to sniffing it much to the owners’ amusement.
"Wow, he really doesn't like you."
"Yet. He doesn't like me yet." You replied with renewed determination.
“I’m Tsukishima Kei, and I should probably know the name of the person trying so hard to win over my dog…”
“(L/n) (Y/n). Have a nice walk guys.” A soft smile graced your lips upon noticing Rekkusu eating the treat, a small victory you’d claim (though you hoped the blonde hadn’t noticed your fist pump when walking inside).
It was only when you returned from your break that afternoon did your happy mood get disgruntled, by yen sitting on the counter no less.
"Tips? What kind of arrog—"
"No not a tip! Some smug tall guy said it was payment." Yui quickly rushed to calm you with hands defensively waving in panic.
Only a brief second passed, looking to Yui with a deadpan gaze.
"Blonde?"
She nodded.
"Big dog?"
"Uh-huh." Yui curiously responded.
"Glasses?"
A hum of agreement.
"Dickhead."
"Yes! That's him!"
"No I mean, he's not a dickhead. He just didn't have to pay, I'm trying to win over his dog..."
"(L/n)-san, what?" Her previous excitement dwindled, her cause for concern now persisting.
"Nothing, nothing. Guess he's a kind person, but that doesn't mean the challenge ends here."
———
Much to Tsukishimas’ disinterest, it didn’t end. Despite the man only nodding in acknowledgement and diverting his gaze, you made a point to wave whenever you saw him. If you had the time you’d also come to greet Rekkusu who remained as hostile as ever - though you only need take two steps back for him to devour his treats now.
You even caught Tsukishima on one of his training runs, when he’d stopped to check his statistics you’d handed him a bottle of water without a word, just a knowing smile.
Then came a time you were actually on a break during one of your evening shifts, you were outside with a hot drink enjoying the autumn breeze when he’d awkwardly stood at your table. Rekkusu alerted you to their presence instantly, a solid bark in play but his masters’ demeanour was what perplexed you most.
“Would you mind if I joined you? I was going to get a coffee anyway…”
“Sure Tsukishima, do you want me to watch Rekkusu whilst you grab one?” Even if your request was a whimsical one, you were both offended and amused by the growl you received.
“He’s still y’know, stubborn.”
Nevertheless, the blonde rejoined your table with a coffee and pastry in hand - one he slid over to you.
“Uh, your colleagues said you liked this one. Dunno how you work with them though, they sure squeal a lot.”
“Huh they do? Well either way, I can’t accept this bu—“
“You told them not to let me pay for his treats anymore, but I owe you for them. You don’t have the option to refuse right now.” Kei had said it so bluntly that you couldn’t even argue, meekly accepting with another thanks.
You’d actually conversed with him then. You’d found out he was on the Sendai Frogs volleyball team and worked at the museum in the city. In exchange he’d learned about you and your coffee shop, and of course that he’d adopted Rekkusu during his third year of high school at Karasuno. By the end of your break, you felt closer in a way.
Rekkusu didn’t bark at you when they left.
———
From then it seemed whenever you’d seen the pair, Rekkusus’ barks seemed friendlier and his tail wagged upon seeing you. Occasionally he’d pull Tsukishima toward you as you knelt to offer a signature Puppiccino.
“I hate this.”
“I have successfully used the power of Pavlov~”
“It’s called bribery.” Tsuki mockingly interjected.
“Either way, I’m still winning this challenge.”
“Your self-issued challenge. This has nothing to do with me.”
“Luckily your approval doesn’t matter to me, only Rekkusus, isn’t that right boy?” Came your melodious tone, the canine barking excitedly.
“Traitor.” It was muttered begrudgingly, but you continued conversation regardless.
“Good luck with your new exhibition today, if you can please take a picture of it and show me!”
“Instead of making me come back here, would I be able to send it to you by phone?”
“My contact details?” The surprise was obvious, but Kei remained blunt and composed with his usual bit of sarcasm.
“Ideally yeah. Here’s mine.”
Yet, you’d spoken often enough to know about his workplace and vice versa, so you suppose this was the natural next step in friendship.
———
Tsukishima wouldn’t normally bring anyone along to your café but he’d reached a crossroads, a block that he couldn’t surpass without an old teammate it seemed.
“So… why are we here?”
“Because it allows dogs.” Tsukishima breathed, way too nonchalant for even him, which only left Yamaguchi asking further questions.
“Yes, but we’ve always gone for walks.”
“I just need you to see something…” The blonde seethed, holding the door open for his partner to enter.
“Ah hey Tsukishima, Rekkusu~” A gentle pat was given to the fluffy boy with a wagging tail, and only then did he happily whine at you.
“Hi (L/n), this is Yamaguchi. A friend from elementary school.”
The freckled man only waved at you with a bright smile, Tsukishima gave their order and the trio went to be seated.
“Nice to meet a friend of Tsuki.”
“…Tsuki?”
“So?”
“Rekkusu!” Tsukishima waited expectantly for Yamaguchi to finish. “They pet him… And he didn’t mind!”
“I know.”
“That’s really weird, have you known them long?” The shy man consisted carefully, Tsuki flicking from Rekkusu to answer honestly.
“A month or more, I see them nearly everyday in passing but we’ve only spoken properly a few times.”
“Ah… Tsuki do you li—“
“No.”
“Right.” Yamaguchi radiated disbelief, to the point Kei doubted his own denial, but his friend only looked to the pleased dog as if he portrayed Tsukishimas’ feelings better than the namesake.
“I have (L/n)s’ contact, maybe it’d be worth bringing them to the museum at some point?”
“Maybe, would a walk with Rekkusu be too committing?”
“Shut up!”
———
Now you’d never have considered the museum to be as daunting but when Tsukishima asked you to meet him here you accepted, currently queuing up for tickets.
“What are you doing (L/n)?”
“Uh- tickets? To get in?”
“Idiot, I work here and you’re my—“ He paused, fingers to the bridge of his nose. “You’re my guest, you can come in with me.”
With a flick of his ID, the two of you were allowed entry, you spent a majority of the day at the museum - Tsukishima particularly enthused when you’d reached the dinosaur exhibits and seemed to be an expert. Must be his specialty.
Another day you’d grabbed takeout coffee from your café and walked Rekkusu through the nearby park.
“Y’know, even though he’s quite standoffish, he’s a really good dog.”
“Yeah, I thought he’d mellow as he aged but he defied my expectations.” Kei admiringly answered, the two of you watching him catch his frisbee midair.
“Hm, Yamaguchi met him as a puppy right? And he’s known you for a while, is that why he calls you Tsuki?”
“Only he’s allowed to call me that.”
“I figured, you might as well call me (Y/n), that’s what my friends tend to do.” Even if you shrugged casually, you still noted the brief flush of colour tinting the blondes ears.
“You can call me Kei then. Fairs fair.”
“Kei huh? I’m honoured.”
“Shut up (Y/n).”
———
Now with these frequent outings to here, there, and everywhere, it came as no surprise when it turned into dating somewhere along the line. Once more, your coworkers squealed at the news - now you knew what Kei was talking about…
Nonetheless, even though it had taken quite a lot of time, Rekkusu had warmed to you as well. This time when Tsukishima and Yamaguchi were out walking his dog, the two weren’t shocked when Rekkusu barked and bounded up to your approaching figure. Basically tackling you the grassy ground as you went to greet him in return.
“He really loves (Y/n), doesn’t he?” Kei has spoken absentmindedly whilst overlooking the scene, a soft smile upon his features.
Yamaguchi stared also, flicking from you and Rekkusu to his best friend in quiet understanding.
“Well, they say Tsuki…” A knowing smile. “That dogs take after their owners.”
“I guess, this one time, they’re right.”
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[ Masterlist ]
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hyunniesgirl · 11 months ago
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Another Love | Part 4
Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.
Words count: 6,639
Warnings for this chapter: angst(as usual)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
A/N: I'm sorry it took me a bit longer to write this part, I'm just in a weird place right now. I'm doubting a lot about my skills as a writer and that leads me to believe everything I write sucks so this was a bit harder to write, I hope you all like it though.
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Jisung has been dreaming about you lately. Going back to every little memory he has with you, watching all the signs you gave him while he was oblivious to you, to your feelings.
It's been almost a week since Han ended things with Lia. The things she said are still stuck in his head, he can't be in love with you. Not after rejecting you. Not after everything you went through to get over him. Not now, when you're happy with someone else.
Things are going back to the way they were before, except that now your roles are reversed, he's the one hanging on your every word and movement, all the little details about you look fascinating to him. He's never felt this way before.
You're not avoiding him anymore. Things fell into place slowly, you started having dinner together again, talking about your day. Then you got back to making coffee for him in the morning, waking him up with the nice scent so he wouldn't be too grumpy woking up so early.
He has a mission now: to stop these strange thoughts he's having. Even if he is indeed feeling this way about you, he lost his chance. He knows he did. Right now, he wants to focus on being a good friend to you, the same as he was before the confession happened.
Jisung just didn't expect how he would feel seeing you with Jeongho again. You invited all your friends to dinner in a nice restaurant, to officially introduce your boyfriend to everyone.
This must be how you felt seeing him with all his previous partners, you must have felt this ache in your chest, as if someone was holding your heart and squeezing it to their heart's content.
You look pretty, hair tied in a ponytail and a dress he never saw before, maybe it's a gift from your boyfriend, he wouldn't know. He avoids talking about your relationship, too selfish to handle the same pain you did for so many years.
Your friendship is getting back to what it was, even though he screwed up really badly, you were the bigger person and forgave him, so he has no right feeling this way about you.
Jisung knows it would be better for you and for him if you didn't come back to the apartment but he's too greedy, he wants you close to him.
This whole problem began because he was greedy, afterall. He didn't want to stay away from you, then he hurt you again and again trying to fix things. Now he just wants to make things right, he just wants you to be happy.
You're smiling so brightly it actually makes his heart skip a beat. He sips from his drink, trying to calm his heart a bit and watch as the others try to make small talk.
“So how did you meet y/n?” Chan asks Jeongho.
“I had the biggest crush on her in middle school but she mercilessly rejected me”, Jeongho answers, looking at you and smiling playfully.
“I thought he had lost a bet or something”, you defend yourself.
“Why would you think that?” Han asks, surprised and you stare at him for a second before shrugging. Of course Jisung was not the only reason for you to reject Jeongho, you were just learning about your feelings at that time. You just couldn't get your head around why someone older and handsome like Jeongho would want to have anything to do with you.
“Y/N was one of the prettiest girls in our school”, Han comments, not understanding why you would feel like that.
He always thought you were pretty, that's why he always complimented you and gave you clothes saying they would look good on you.
“I think teenagers are just insecure. I guess it's part of growing up”, you sip from your wine glass.
Jisung never thought you were insecure about anything by the way you carried yourself with your head high, always so sure about everything you put your mind into. Maybe there's too much he doesn't know about you.
The rest of the dinner goes well, your friends are being nice and trying to make Jeongho comfortable, you're happy about it. Everything seems to be falling into place with your best friend by your side being his normal self and your boyfriend, the guy you're falling in love with being just perfect. Your heart is finally healing, you're moving on, things are working out. You couldn't wish for anything else, you just want things to stay like this forever.
“Are you happy?” Jisung asks when you're outside the restaurant, Jeongho stepped out to take a call from work and left you and your friends alone. One by one they called it a night, saying their goodbyes and leaving you and Han alone.
You stare at him for a moment before answering.
“Yes, I am”, you're not sure why he wants to know and not even sure why you're thinking so much before answering.
Jisung smiles, a sincere and bright smile.
“I'm glad”, he says, “I want you to be happy”
You are a bit taken aback, you didn't expect him to react this way, he almost sounds like a grown up now.
“Thanks, I-”
“I'm sorry I kept you waiting”, Jeongho's voice cuts you out. He slides his arm over your shoulders pulling you closer.
“I should get going”, Jisung says, turning his gaze away from you and your boyfriend.
“Aren't you going home?” You ask and he shakes his head, he's not sure if he can stay at the same place with you two for much longer. “Oh, are you going to Lia's?”
There's not a bit of discomfort in your face, so he just nods. He's not sure if now is the best moment to tell you about his situation with Lia.
“Okay, see you tomorrow then”, you hesitate, not sure if it's appropriate, but you try not thinking too much, throwing your arms around him, squeezing him into a hug. You would never think twice about hugging him before your confession, there's no need for you to make it awkward now.
You're trying to get things back to the way they were and Jisung notices that, he's grateful. So the only thing he can do is wrap his arms around your waist, hugging you back.
Jisung didn't want to lie, but he's afraid it may be uncomfortable to you if he says he's not with Lia anymore. And he's afraid you'll be able to see right through him, see that he is giving in to the strange feelings he's trying so hard to avoid.
He ends up sleeping on Chan's couch, if he could call that ‘sleeping’. Everytime he closes his eyes, you show up in his mind, smiling, making a joke, just looking at him. Everytime he finally managed to fall asleep, you would be there, together with your boyfriend, giggling and kissing him while Jisung just watched. He would wake up sweating and stare at the ceiling for at least ten minutes before trying to sleep again.
>><<
After pondering what he wanted to do from now on, Jisung decided he should have some closure with Lia. He didn't like the way things ended with her, he really liked her until a certain point and above all, she is a good person. Even though he didn't want to, he ended up hurting her and he should apologize for that.
Awkward. That's the best word to explain the situation that Jisung finds himself in right now. Lia is on the other side of the table, glaring at him like she could kill him with the power of her mind.
“What is it that you want?” She asks, coldly.
He clears his throat, trying to gather some courage.
“I want to apologize”, he says, “I shouldn't have lead you on even though I already knew something was not right”, sighing he looks at her, biting his lower lip, “I'm just… confused, I ended up hurting you in the middle of this mess and I'm really sorry”
Lia looks at his eyes, staring deeply. She can feel his sincerity but she's not sure if only an apology is enough to make up for the pain he caused. She's not crazy, she knows people can't control how they feel most of the time. Maybe if he just admits he likes you, she'll feel at ease.
“So, have you finally accepted that you're in love with y/n?”
Jisung thinks for a bit, trying to put what he is feeling into words.
“I don't know if love is the right word”, he says, fidgeting with his fingers, “but I'm feeling some weird things around her, when she smiles or laughs, or even when she's doing nothing”, he covers his mouth with his hand in a slap, wide eyes, realizing he is talking about being in love with someone else with the girl that likes him.
Lia chuckles.
“It's alright, I'm pretty sure that's the definition of love though”, she sighs looking at Jisung. “Maybe you never felt that before”
It's not easy for her to be kind and comprehensive at the moment, but it's not like being mean is going to make him like her back. She's not actually even sure if she wants that anymore. Maybe her heart just accepted things ended, maybe she was already preparing herself for this since Han started acting differently, but the pain is not as great as she thought it would be. Maybe seeing him naively admitting his feelings made her have some sympathy for the mess he made of his relationship with you, maybe she didn't like him as much as she thought.
Since the beginning, there were too many maybes in this relationship. Lia knows she deserves better, she deserves someone who's sure about her, no maybes.
“I think I can forgive you, yeah”, she chuckles seeing Jisungs shocked face, “not now, obviously”, with a sigh, she looks deeply into his eyes, “you were always great to me before things started going wrong and I know you're not a bad person”, she stands up, “I'm actually feeling bad for you, with the mess you created I have no idea how you're going to fix it, but I'll cheer for you”, she puts her hand in his shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance. Lia leaves Jisung there, stuck in his head once more. At least that is something they both have in common, because he sure doesn't know how he's going to keep these strange feelings under control while fixing his relationship with you.
>><<
If Jisung had to rate his acting skills, he would be proud to say he deserves an award. He's succeeding at pretending not to be in love with you while maintaining a healthy friendship.
It's almost the same as it was before, except Jisung has to watch his every move. He's trying to act normal while trying to crush the onslaught of feelings in his chest everytime you laugh at one of his jokes, or when you just talk about your very normal day.
You both do your things during the day, have dinner together and talk or watch something before sleeping, that's your routine when Jeongho is not visiting.
You've been watching your phone lately, more than usual, is there something wrong? He's sure you're just waiting for Jeongho's call. Jisung has lost count of how many nights he spent listening to your laughs on the phone with your boyfriend, wishing it was him making you happy like that.
It's true, he's struggling. He's not sure how you managed to like him for so long without freaking out, because he's about to collapse and it's been just about a month since he came to terms with his feelings.
He feels bad just thinking about how much you must have suffered because of him, before and after your confession. Guilt is eating him alive, along with heartbreak.
He's been watching you for a while now, you are washing the dishes while talking about these kids you tutor and how smart they are, he's staring at you with heart eyes—you're not seeing—while he dries the dishes.
“I'm sure they can only learn so fast because it's you teaching them”, Jisung says.
You giggle to his compliment, bumping a shoulder into his.
“Should we watch a movie before going to bed?” You ask, drying your hands on your apron.
“I'm actually kinda sleepy”, Jisung laughs, he can only keep his feeling bottled for so long, he doesn't want to get careless and blurt out everything. He knows that if he gets too comfortable he'll feel at ease and you were always too good at making him tell you what's on his mind.
“Let's do it another time then”, you shrug, taking your phone out of your pocket and smiling when the screen brightens with Jeongho's name.
Han feels his chest tighten, he wants to throw up, he wants to cry, he wants to plead for you to not like someone else. But he can't do any of those things, not when you're so happy. So he won't be selfish, he'll think about you first and keep his distance.
>><<
It's been almost a month since the last time you saw Jeongho. He was not able to come by on the usual weekends because the company he works for is opening a new branch somewhere and he is involved in the project.
He's been busy, texting less and not even calling, so you start getting insecure. What if he's getting cold feet about your relationship? Maybe he met someone more interesting who's near him.
No. Jeongho wouldn't be like that. He would break up if he didn't like you anymore, you know him enough to know that.
When he calls saying he's coming to see you, you feel excited once again. You knew you were mistaken, it's not right to presume the worst just because he's a bit more busy. It must be nothing.
You just can't shake the feeling that you were going through the calm before the storm and now the bad weather is finally coming.
He's waiting for you at the restaurant of the hotel he's staying in, Jeongho is fidgeting with his fingers nervously, looking around until his eyes land on you. You smile at him, waving at him but he doesn't smile back.
“Hey”, you say, dropping your bag on the chair and sitting, “is there something wrong?”
“I received a promotion”, he says suddenly, he doesn't look happy about it.
“That's great”, you smile, taking his hand into yours to hold it, not really understanding his reaction.
He stares at your hands together, taking a deep breath before speaking again.
“Actually, the company wants me to go to Europe”, Jeongho says, fidgeting with his hands.
“Oh”, you frown, “for how long?”
“They are not sure about the exact period, but-”, he clears his throat, looking around, “they are projecting it to be between five and eight years”, he replies, feeling his breathing quickening.
“They want you to move there?” You repeat it to yourself, trying to absorb the information.
“They are trying to make an entry in the European market, so a team is needed there to develop the new branch”
“Okay, yeah”, you feel dizzy, “we can work with that, hm, I can- we can visit each other”, you nod, trying to organize your thoughts.
“Y/N-”, Jeongho starts, his voice fails and he stops for a moment before continuing. “Long distance works right now because we are a 2 hour flight away from each other, not 12 hours”
“What are you saying?” You feel all the air in your lungs escape, knowing exactly what he means but choosing not to believe it.
“I don't think we can keep doing this, I'm not sure our relationship is going to survive and-”, he sighs, running his hand through his hair, “I won't ask you to come with me”
“Why not? Why won't you ask me?” You plead, feeling tears brimming in your eyes. It's not logical what you're asking of him, but you don't want to hurt anymore, not again.
“How could I? I can't make you leave your whole life here, your family, your friends or college to go to a country where you know no one but me”, he explains, “I’ll be in charge of a large project, I'll have to stay late probably everyday and you're going to stay alone, how could I do that to you?”
“Don't you think that's for me to decide?” You ask, feeling your hands shaking. You put them in between your legs, trying not to show him the sight of your broken heart.
“I can't- I can't carry that guilt with me”, he says, “not knowing how happy you are here, if you go with me and things end up not working out I could never forgive myself”
“What if things work out? What if we are happy together forever? Did you consider it for a moment?” You ask, he's not looking at you. Jeongho is trying to hold his own tears, trying to be strong for you, “I guess this relationship is not worth you considering it”, you stand up, grabbing your bag.
He lifts his eyes to look at him, finding your quivering lips and the tears flooding from your eyes.
“Well, good luck then”, you tell him, turning around and walking out.
After walking far enough from the hotel, you let yourself crouch on the floor, scaring the people walking by. You are sobbing, trying to wipe the tears from your eyes, but they keep coming continuously.
You stand up again, walking, what are you supposed to do now? When are things going to finally get better for you? Since you confessed to Jisung things got worse over and over, you should have never told him about your feelings, maybe your life would have stayed the same.
The hurt you felt seeing him with other people was a pain you were already used to, but this? This is excruciating, it's the same all over again, the same as when Jisung rejected you. Will you ever feel complete again?
It's 3 a.m, Jisung went to the studio to work for a bit and to try to forget about everything else. His phone buzzes in his pocket, when he looks at the screen, your name is there. He doesn't think twice about answering, just to find your drunk voice on the other side of the call. He can't understand a thing you're saying just that you'll share your location with him.
He grabs the keys to his car, running to the parking lot, he drives for about thirty minutes until arriving where you are. The bar is empty, there are only employees cleaning and you're laying on the counter, unconscious.
“It's been a while since we closed, but we let her stay inside since it looks like she went through something”, the bartender tells Han when he gets closer.
“Thank you”, Jisung says, before trying to wake you up with no success. He sighs, looking around and thinking about what to do.
He slides one of your arms around his neck, putting one of his hands behind your back for support and the other underneath your knees, lifting you up.
Your face is puffy, he can see it now that he's looking so closely, you probably cried a lot but what would make you cry like that?
Jisung glances at you a few times during the ride home. You groan, whining something in your sleep, even crying a bit. That makes him even more worried.
He repeats the process of picking you up when he parks in front of your apartment, carrying you inside. You whimper all the way to the apartment, he knows you can wake up at any moment.
Han sits you on your bed, taking your coat off and helping you lay down, covering you with a blanket after taking off your shoes. Your makeup is all smeared, so he picks a wet tissue and starts rubbing your face, trying to take off everything he can.
You open your eyes slowly, seeing Jisung with a focused expression while whipping your face.
“What are you doing?” You ask, making him jump. He was so concentrated he didn't even see you waking up.
“I was trying to take your makeup off”, he says, “it's not good for you to sleep with it on your face”
“How did I come home?” You look around, stumbling a bit over your words.
“You don't remember calling me?” He asks and you shake your head. “I went to the bar to pick you up”
Jisung is still whipping your face while he talks, that's when you remember why you were in the bar in the first place and tears run out of your eyes again.
“What happened? Why are you crying like this?” He asks worriedly, helping you sit on the bed.
“I don't- everything goes wrong for me”, you say, sobbing. “Maybe I'm the problem”
Jisung sighs, pulling you into a hug and holding you tightly, feeling your tears soak his shirt. He's worried and doesn't know what to do, should he call Hannah? Or Jeongho? Jisung knows you went to meet with him earlier… wait, did that guy do this to you?
After you stop sobbing for a while, Jisung realizes you fell asleep in his embrace. He lies you on the bed, covering you with the blanket once more. He leaves a glass of water and some hangover medicine on your nightstand so you can take in the morning and prepares his bed on the floor.
You wake up to the bright sunlight coming from the window, your head hurts like crazy and you're so thirsty it seems like a thousand years since you last drank something.
You take the hangover medicine and the water, while sitting down, still a bit dizzy. When your feet touch the floor, it's not the hard ground they meet but something soft. Why is Jisung sleeping by your bedside?
He doesn't look a bit comfortable, although he seems fast asleep. You start poking him, trying to make him wake up, causing your friend to jump and hold your arm.
“Are you alright?” He asks, eyes widened.
You frown at the sight, it's been a while since you last saw Jisung this startled.
“Yeah”, you answer and he can finally let out the breath he didn't even notice was being held. “Why are you sleeping on the floor?”
He looks around for a bit as if he didn't understand why you were asking such a thing.
“Oh, I- hm- I was afraid you would need something so I stayed here just in case”, he tells you and you nod.
It's not an uncommon occurrence for you two to do this kind of thing, even when you were living with your parents. When one of you got sick, it was a tradition to stay by each other's side until the other felt better.
When you moved in with him, naturally, your drinking habits grew since you didn't have to worry about your parents anymore. Jisung was responsible for taking care of you when you came home wasted after partying with Hannah or even when you drunk with him and the boys, he made sure to stay sober enough to still be able to take you home and help you get to your room safely.
“Oh”, you answer, “thank you”
He kept staring at you, waiting for something you're not sure what is.
“Do you want to talk about the reason you got wasted last night?” He asks, awkwardly and the pain comes back all at once.
It was so nice, the period of numbness after waking up from a deep sleep, you wish you could keep feeling that way. Now, your hands are trembling again, just like last night, tears are brimming in your eyes and your lips are quivering. It's obvious to Jisung, you're trying not to cry.
He gets up, collecting the things he used to sleep, without looking at you, he doesn't want to make you any more uncomfortable.
“We don't have to talk about it”, he says, putting the blanket and pillow back in your wardrobe. “Do you want me to call Hannah?” He asks and you stare at him for a moment, nodding to his question, not really wanting to look at your phone.
You're scared Jeongho contacted you, you don't want to see him. But more than anything, you're scared he didn't try talking to you at all, because that means everything is really over.
It's pathetic, you know that break ups happen. But Jeongho was the first guy to ever make you feel the closest to what you ever felt for Jisung, no other could do that and you're scared no one ever will.
Hannah gets to your place about an hour after Jisung called her. She's huffing, hair messed up and puffy face.
“Were you sleeping?” You ask her and she takes a deep breath, seeing that you're okay.
“I'm going to kill that guy”, she yells out of the door to your room, “he made it seems like you were dying or something”
“If I was dying I'm pretty sure he would have taken me to the hospital”, you point out.
Hannah rolls her eyes, dropping her bag on the floor. Closing the door, she walks slowly to sit on your bed, she can clearly see that you cried a lot.
“So, did something happen?” She asks, you avoid her gaze, looking at anything but her face. You find your fingers much more interesting than any part of this conversation, actually. So you pay attention to them, playing on your lap.
“It's nothing”, you answer.
Hannah sighs, if you don't want to talk about it, it means it's bad.
“We don't have to talk about it right now”, she stretches her hand, taking yours and squeezing it. “But you will have to talk about it eventually”
It's your time to sigh now, she's right, you know that, but talking about it makes it real and you don't want it to be real.
“Jeongho broke up with me”, you rip the bandaid all at once.
Hannah gasps, she's speechless. How can this be? She thought he was head over heels for you, so why?
“His company is sending him to Europe and he doesn't want to do long distance”, you feel the tears brimming into your eyes again, voice cracking, “or take me with him”
It's the first time in her life Hannah doesn't know what to say. Your love life is such a mess, worse than hers, so she doesn't have any advice or any comfort to give you.
“Honey, I…”, she tries, but what is she supposed to say? ‘I am sorry?’, that's not it, ‘he is an asshole?’ nothing of the sort.
Looking from outside the situation, Jeongho is being logical, they still are in their honeymoon phase of the relationship, everything is perfect at that time. For most people, problems start to arise after some time. However, when you're in love, you don't want logical outputs, you want what your heart wants.
Hannah is saved by a knock on the door. Han's head pops inside the room and he observes for a moment trying to assess the situation.
“I bought some things you like”, he says, “I'll be going out, so you have the apartment all to yourselves”
He wants you to feel comfortable right now, he doesn't know exactly what happened but you're sad. Jisung knows just letting you enjoy your afternoon with Hannah in the apartment is not going to make things better for whatever is making you feel so down, but he knows you are going to feel livelier after some time with Hannah.
He goes out with Hyunjin, who's buying a present for his mother. It's hot, so if his friend didn't ask very nicely he wouldn't have accepted to go to the mall, since they have to wear hoods and masks. The fact that you're home, crying your eyes out for something he has no clue about, made him want to go out too. It hurts seeing you sad and it's even worse because he can't do anything about it, not when he doesn't know what's happening.
They are looking at bags, maybe he should get you something? You are not really a materialistic person, he's not sure if giving you an expensive present is going to help at all, maybe he should get you that webtoon print you've been talking about, they should definitely have it in the bookstore next door.
When Jisung turns around to tell Hyunjin they should stop at the bookstore, he sees Jeongho. He's looking at bags too, trying to figure out which one he should choose.
Is he giving you a gift too? Maybe he did something and you fought, that's why you were crying so much. Even remembering the way you cried as soon as you woke up makes his heart ache.
Jisung walks to Jeongho, not sure how to initiate a conversation but he feels like he should try and help in some way.
“Hey”, he says, watching Jeongho turn around and look at him.
“Jisung, how are you doing?” He asks, arms crossed in front of chest.
“Fine, are you choosing a gift for y/n?” He asks, awkwardly, “I don't think she likes purple”, he points out observing the bags Jeongho was looking at.
“It's actually for my mother”, he clears his throat, frowning, “didn't y/n tell you?”
“Tell me what?” Jisung asks, confused and Jeongho nods.
“So she didn't”, he sighs, “we broke up”, he struggles to say it.
Jisung's eyes dart directly to Jeongho's face, now he can see the eyebags on his face and how tired he looks.
“Why?” Jisung panics, you shouldn't have to go through another heartbreak.
“I don't think it's something you should know about, if she didn't tell you”, Jeongho shrugs.
“Well, can't you fix it? Whatever it is that is wrong?” He asks, carefully.
Jeongho sighs, he wishes there was something he could do about it, but he's a coward who's too afraid of taking such a big step in the beginning of a relationship.
“I’m afraid I can't”, he says, “take care of her”
Jisung is speechless, he has no idea what to do, so he just watches as Jeongho chooses a gift and walks tiredly out of the store.
Jisung arrives after killing some time outside, he was out for almost the entire day and hopes that you could enjoy a bit of your day with Hannah. He doesn't know if he should bring up his encounter with Jeongho or if he should talk about what your, now ex, boyfriend told him.
He shouldn't mention it, if you didn't tell him about it, it's because you're not ready for you to know and he gets that. Han is not sure about what he's feeling. It hurts his heart to see you in so much pain but he doesn't want to overstep the boundaries you're setting.
So when he enters the house, he sees you and Hannah watching a movie, he greets you both and goes to his room. You clearly cried more since he left and he won't be able to stay in your presence without trying to comfort you.
>><<
Things are difficult for you at the moment. Even though your love for Jeongho never got to its full potential, it's still love. You're mourning what you could have had with him had things been different, you wake up in the middle of the night and can't sleep anymore, feeling your chest hurting and remembering it's over.
It all sank in when he didn't contact you anymore, you're sure he's hurting too but you had hoped that you two could find a solution around this cruel puzzle.
“Should we go out?” Hannah asks while you're watching a drama, burying your sorrows in ice cream.
“I'm not really in the mood”, you say. You haven't cried for some time now, you're too tired, maybe your tears finally dried up.
“I know you don't feel like it”, Hannah sighs, looking at your apathetic face, worriedly, “but I think you should have some fresh air, you have been stuck in this apartment for a week now, it's not healthy”
You sigh, she's right, you know she is, but you can't really find the strength to doll up and go out.
“We don't have to go to a party or anything crowded”, she says, seeing the resigned look on your face. “We can just go to a cafe or something, anything”, she pleads.
You nod, sighing in defeat, maybe a walk can really lift your mood a bit.
Hannah jumps out of the sofa, taking the ice cream from your hands. She talks excitedly about what kind of things you two can do but can't really follow what she's saying, your head is still numb.
You walk around for a bit, looking at clothes in the stores nearby, doing just about anything to think of anything but your break up.
It's already night when you two decide to eat something, there's this restaurant that's kinda hidden so there's not many people eating when you arrive. It's not the first time you eat there, it's a nice and cozy place so you come by when you're needing a little bit of peace.
“Y/N?” You hear a familiar voice calling you, making you turn around to find Lia. She's smiling, there's a man accompanying her. “It's been a while”, she says after telling the man to look for a place for them to sit.
“Hey, yeah it does”, you smile politely. Lia can see the huge eyebags you have and the wide eyes your friend has looking at her.
“Are you alright?” She asks, noticing you barely touched your food.
“Yeah”, you lie, “what about you?” You ask, eyeing the guy who's now looking at his phone while waiting for Lia.
“I'm okay”, she smiles shyly, “it's not easy, you know? But I'm trying to move on, meet new people”
You frown, not really understanding what she's talking about.
“I hope we can still be on friendly terms even though Jisung and I are over”, Lia says, regrets immediately when she sees your eyes widen. He didn't tell you. Shit.
“I didn't know you guys were not together anymore”, Hannah is the one to talk, stealing Lia's attention from your shocked face.
“Yeah, hm, it's been a while actually. I thought he would have already told you everything by now”, she says apologetically. “Well, Han Jisung, let's say that now we are even”, she thinks.
“I should probably go!” Lia points out to the man who's staring impatiently. She waves goodbye to you and walks towards him, afraid she'll tell you something more she's not supposed to.
You find yourself in the dark, seated at the sofa, arms crossed in front of your chest. You can't believe you had to hear from someone other than Jisung about his relationship status. You're mad at him, you were making an effort so things could go back to the way they were so why isn't he acting like he wants that too?
Before, he would tell you everything about his romantic endeavors and even though it hurted, you felt special, knowing every little thing about him. Now, you feel like you know nothing, he's spending less time with you and every time you try doing anything just the two of you, he avoids it like you would jump his bones or something if you stay alone with him for more than two hours.
You may have not gotten over him completely, but you're fine now and for years you could behave yourself, so you're not sure why he's acting like that.
You hear the door being open, Han’s voice comes out in a discussion, he's on the phone. He walks in, putting his phone in his pocket while trying to find his way in the dark. He jumps at the sight of you on the sofa, staring at him with a scowl.
“Jesus christ, y/n”, he says, putting his hand above his heart, “what the hell are you doing there in the dark?”
He turns on the light, turning back at you. You're still staring at him in silence.
“Why didn't you tell me you and Lia are not together anymore?” You stand up, waiting for his answer.
“W-what?” His standing falters and he takes a step back. “How did you know?”
“Clearly I didn't find out from my best friend”, you scoff. “Did you think I would try making a move on you if you are single?”
Jisung frowns, how the hell did you get to that conclusion?
“No, I-”
“I'm sure you already figured Jeongho and I broke up”, you point out, “but you rejected me, I'm over that already”
“I can see why you would think that”, Jisung says carefully, “considering the way I acted when you confessed, but it's not that, I can assure you”
“I'm trying to have a normal relationship with you, you know, but you're just not the same. You don't spend time with me anymore, you don't talk to me about what's on your mind, the only thing I can think is that you're scared of me”
“I'm sorry I made you feel that way, I'm trying to act normally too, it's just-” Jisung cuts himself off, not sure what to say. At the same time he doesn't know what to say to make you stop thinking like that, he's not sure things will get any better if he tells you the truth.
“What's it? Just tell me so I can fix it, please I-”
“I'm in love with you”, he blurts out, hand instantly going to his chest and clenching the place above his heart. “I'm so in love with you it hurts”
You stumble back, almost falling. Did you hear it right?
“I don't think I understand”, you say, frowning, trying to make sense of his words.
“I feel terrible, I rejected you and made you suffer just for me to feel like this now?” He scoffs, “I'm sorry I made you think you are the problem again, but you're not, I am. I'm the one who can't stay close to you because I'm afraid I'll do something that will ruin our friendship”
You get up, trying to function properly after this sudden confession. Never, in your wildest dreams did you think there would come a day when Jisung would actually love you in the way you most desperately once wanted. You fantasized about it for years but you never really thought it would happen for real.
“I can't do this right now”, you say to him, seeing his shoulders slump. The sad look in your face is what he most feared. Jisung didn't expect you to still like him, but it would be a lie to say he didn't have any hope of you telling him he still has a chance.
“I don't expect you to like me back”, he says, voice cracking a bit when he tries to say the words he least want to, “I just don't want you to think I'm avoiding you because of you, it's because of me”
You nod slowly, still not fully recovered from the shock. You walk past him, not saying anything anymore, just entering your room and closing the door silently. This was definitely unexpected.
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A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback give me motivation to keep writing. Also, you can buy me a coffee.
Taglist(closed):
@hhwangsmoon @weareapackofstrays @shycreationdreamland @adestayskz @skizmee @ca11me3mily @realviviboss @sofix-hc7 @starsandrqindrops @its-hannjisung @redstayrosie @mae-is-cute98 @blithevix @astro-doll-the-star @vlctorriaa @captainchrisstan @rag-iii @notastraykid @jisunghannie @applepie-macaroon @stayingdelulu @sundayysunshine @kidrauhlschik @wolfennracha @meloncremesoda @hanschimpmunk @realrintaro @teejisung @maexc @gyustarzzi @ivaneedssleep @chaeryred @daemon-bunny @broken-glowsticks @ch4nniebang @sleepyleeji @seukijeuxq @luvbangchan @lovesunshinefelix @hyunjins-dimples @castielsfrillywhiteknickers @armystay89 @literallyjustwanttoread @jisunghannie @jungkookies1002 @diorggukie @channieandhisgoonsquad @mamabymychem @ladylexis @bmnyy
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clementinecleo · 3 months ago
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Know how
young Ford + Reader
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Summary..
You and Ford are working on a research paper, and you comfort him about his 'weirdness'
non genderd reader
💫
You and Ford first met in college due to having the same morning lecture. He was nervous and slightly confused when you decided to start a conversation with him about Constellations, and soon It was small things here and there. A walk n talk, or just a quick wave around campus. Eventually, you guys became acquaintances. Getting coffee and reading together, he was always nose deep in his books.
And one day during class, your professor announced a project for your midterm. Telling you all to form into groups of however many people, and you turned your head to look at Ford, who was sitting next to you. He was chewing on his pen before he noticed you staring at him.
You looked at his eyes, smiling gently as you spoke up. “Partners?” with a tilt of your head. He nodded. The rest of the class consisted of the professor explaining what to do and how to, and then let everyone go.
As you packed up and got ready to go back to your dorm to absolutely pass out, Ford cleared his throat. You shook the tiredness out of your head and glanced at him. “should we go to yours? For the project, I mean.” You interrupted him with a chuckle and replied. “Yeah, sure dude. Follow me” you gestured, walking down the steps with him trailing behind you like a stray dog.
As you both walked, you spoke up. "Hey, do you have any other friends? Not in a mean way- just I only ever see you walking alone."
Ford rubbed the back of his neck and replied solemnly. "Well my only close friend is fiddleford. He's my roommate. But he's in a lot of different programs so we don't see eachother much on campus other than in our shared dorm"
You grin, "Fiddleford? I remember him! He was the one who fell asleep in the fountain after a party right?"
Ford chuckled and nodded "I had to carry him back to our dorm. Woke up the next day not remembering anything from the night before."
You both walked in comfortable silence through the winding hallways. footsteps echoed and voices boomed as people passed by. At one point going down an elevator a girl giggled at Ford and murmured something crude about him. Immediately Ford shrunk back, shoving his hands in his pockets. You gave the girl a disgusted look before trying to walk up to her and ask why she was being a bitch but you felt a hesitant tug of your sleeve.
Ford had an unreadable look on his face as he shoved his hands into his pockets. muttering a small “it's fine, really. Don't worry about her.” you gave him a ‘are you sure?’ and he just nodded, then looked away.
The second week of you two casually hanging out, Ford asked looked up from his notebook and looked at you. "Why did you approach me, y/n?" he asked, curious about your reasoning.
And you awnserd truthfully. "Well, I actually thought you were really smart for someone going to..this college. And it fascinated me. What nade you want to come here? Whats your backstory.-" but halfway through talking you can see a very confused and surprised look on his face. And before you could even ask, he opened his mouth. “and..not for my fingers?”
He lifted both his hands towards you. wiggling them, really trying to prove that you supposedly faking it. This was his way if trying to freak you out and drive you away. But it back fired horribly.
You looked at him bewilderd, and as he held his hand up you counted. 1..2..3..4..5..6!
You gave him an excited smile and basically shouted at him. “Oh my god! I didn't even notice- that's so cool man!” after asking your 7th question about his hands you realized you had just made him extremely uncomfortable. And you apologized profusely. he didn't talk to you for a couple days after that. So you never dared to mention them again. Even going as far as to not look at his hands at all.
You guys got to your dorm and as you opened your door he was hit with the scent of your favorite candle and the cool air conditioning. His body relaxed, before he gently closed the door and sat on a nearby chair. Looking out of place while pulling out his note book in your very..interestingly decorated dorm.
“So, we should get started on the research first and make sure every source is as factual as possible-” He took his nose out of his book to look over at you to see if you were listening to him but your eyes were trained on his fingers.
"can I see your hand?" you ask with a blank face.
Oh.
He sighed. Why would he ever think he'd make a friend as popular as you? He went straight to overthinking. Imagining you laughing at him or running out the door to go gossip with your multitude of friends across campus. He gave up. Might aswell show you, he's never better for anything else but his weirdness.
You grabbed his hands so gently he barely noticed you even touched them. You handled them with such care as if you breathed the wrong way he'd shatter. Your hands were smooth and warm.
A shiver crawled down his back as you ran your index finger up and down each and every six of his fingers. Circling around every knuckle and especially his thumbs. Lifting his hand up so you could see his palm. Tracing the lines and indents across it- and it reminded him of when his mother would give him palm readings. and suddenly, he wasn't so afraid of you anymore. It all washed away.
You were absolutely and utterly mesmerized. You'd never seen such beautiful hands.
“Stanford, your hands are divine.”
You muttered out.
His heart jumped up into his throat and his face turned as pink as bubblegum, stammering and watching you fiddle with his middle finger..or well one of them. He watches in amazement, his heart beating through his chest. Butterflies galore, how could one ever handle holding hands with someone? Gosh he was overthinking- you're hands are so reassuring. This is too new, you're so gentle and any time your finger runs up his hand he tries not to let out an embarrassing gasp.
"Ford?" You speak up. "You still there?"
"Yes! of course. Why do you ask?" His hands are so sweaty now and suddenly he can smell his bo and gets self conscious on the one empty pizza box he left out.
"Everything about you is so intriguing and weird..but in a good way. Your hands- your fingers. They're amazing." you say in awe.
Fords cheeks go a deep red and he starts coughing, nodding along. And he froze when you said his fingers were amazing. "You really think so?" he says, locking eyes with you.
"Of course. I've never seen something so..stunning. You're such a oddball, Stanford Pines." you chuckled.
the rest of the night was filled with you and Ford having a deep conversation about things, almost forgetting you had a paper to work on.
You both smiled at eachother fondly and the night went on.
💫
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deathshallbethelastenemy · 1 year ago
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where you go, i go (2)
TEEN!gojo x FEM!reader (soulmate AU)
TW⚠️: angst, toji being toji, reader thinks about killing someone, gojo is in his tweaked out enlightenment era soooooo gojo a little creepy and eerie
Part 2 of what you see, i see
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She had been going through the motions for the rest of the day, she hadn't even bothered to stop by her school clubs, until she arrived home. A sickly sweet scent of pastries attacked her senses the second she entered. Her house doubled as a bakery for the first floor. It was a popular hang out place for people her age especially for couples. There was a parade of them this time - cheerful couples were already sharing their coffees and sugary pastries.
The universe was laughing at her. It had to be. Why else would there be so many happy couples in the store right now? It was pointing and laughing hysterically on the ground saying: "That's what you get for ignoring me! That's what you get for resenting my gift to you!" Because that's what a soulmate was, a gift. A rare and wonderful gift that no one believed in, except for those who have experienced it themselves, and she had lost it; lost him.
She almost cried on the spot.
Her mother waved gleefully from behind the register, her daughter seldom returned it as she went up the stairs. She dropped her school bag in her room besides her desk and, face first, flopped on her bed.
She closed her eyes. Nothing, there was nothing.
Her lip quivered as tears began to sting her eyes, but she couldn't cry. Not when her mother was expecting her to change and put on an apron and help as she always did after school. She could silently mourn him tonight.
She let out a shaky breath. Did she even have the right to mourn him? She had never met him or talked to him. Everytime she thought of him recently was only to insult him or dismiss him entirely. No, she did not have the right to mourn him and she deserved to feel empty on the inside.
She put on a clean apron and slugged her way down stairs with a smile as she took over her mother's place at the register. Her mom kissed the top of her head and beamed at her with a thumbs up.
She never understood why so many people hated working retail, but now, she did. She had to force a smile and treat every customer kindly, all the while, she was dying on the inside.
A man had come in. Tall and insanely buff, a scar on his mouth. He ordered the cheapest pastry on the menu and handed her a wadded up yen. Her blood turned cold when their fingers brushed.
Her mother quickly took the money away from her as she gave her a quick command to check on the oven in the back.
She swallowed and listened to her mom. Her steps were quick as she pushed the double doors that led to the kitchen, she hugged herself.
It was him. It had to be him. That was the man who killed Gojo Satoru. She reached for a knife and gripped it tight. She should kill him. Her soulmate was dead and he was the reason why. She should try and avenge him.
Sheshouldsheshouldsheshouldsheshould-
The oven blared next to her. Her head snapped to it as the knife clattered on the ground, and with shaky mitted hands she opened the oven, and took out the fresh pastries.
Those were dangerous thoughts; thoughts she never thought she would ever have against anyone. She took off the oven mitts and looked outside the circle window of the kitchen - he was leaving and her mother was watching him like a hawk, even when the bell rang sharply with a muffin in his mouth as he walked outside with the rest of the crowd. She didn't know what possessed her to run after him, but she did. Maybe, all she wanted to know was why he had killed Gojo Satoru. Maybe, she wanted this man to kill her too, so she wouldn't feel empty inside anymore.
A blur of a conversation as the words tumbled out of her mouth: "Why? Why did you kill Satoru?"
She didn't register anything other than his gruff voice, "Ah, he had a soulmate. If I were you I'd keep that information to yourself from now on." Uninterestedly, he continued, "You wouldn't want the Gojo clan to know about you. No doubt, they'll try to marry you off to another member of the clan." and then, kept walking.
She didn't hear the interest in his voice when he said to himself, "But she would be worth a lot of money if I did take her to them." He would negotiate a price first to see if he was right about her being worth any money. He would worry about that later, right now, he had a star plasma vessel to turn in.
A sharp tug on her arm is all that stopped her from running after him again.
"______! What were you thinking?" her mother gritted out as she led her back into the bakery. Her mother's voice is strict and unwavering, "Go to your room."
And she did.
She tossed the apron on her desk and kicked her school bag. How was she supposed to live like this with the rest of her entire life half-full?
A sob violently escaped her.
This was how everyone else in the world lived, she realized.
Aching and alone.
Desperate and searching.
Wanted and unwanted.
Now, she was just like everyone else like she had always wanted. She supposed, she couldn't complain.
She laid in bed, wrapped herself in a blanket - trying to keep warm, but she doubted, she'd ever feel warm again as she cried herself to sleep.
She dreamt about Satoru. Flashes of a long chain, of red, of purple, of blood, of a crowd clapping, of someone wrapped in a white sheet, of a long dark hallway.
The universe was laughing at her again. Why else would it give her dreams about him?
An uneasiness settled into her bones. Someone was watching her. The grim reaper, no doubt wearing the face of her soulmate's assassin. If death wanted her, so be it.
She kept her eyes closed.
She saw herself sleeping soundly in death's gaze. She saw the time pass through her window changing from sundown to night as death continued to watch her intently.
Hours had passed.
00:57:39
She wondered at what specific time the grim reaper would take her.
1:13:01
Did it want her to open her eyes?
1:13:10
Probably.
1:13:15
The grim reaper has been patiently waiting for her.
1:13:17
Why keep death waiting then?
1:13:20
Her eyes fluttered open.
Beautiful, vibrant cerulean blue.
It was not death. It was -
"Satoru," she whispered.
"______," he whispered back.
Satoru was sitting down on the floor extremely close to her bed with his legs crossed while his hands rested neatly on his ankles. There was dry blood on his face and on his white dress shirt.
Her mouth moved but no sound came.
"You were crying," he said as he caressed her cheek soothing his thumb along the trail of stained lines that her dried tears had left, "alot."
So, he had seen everything.
She put her hand over his and gently rubbed circles.
Satoru scooted closer to her bed, "I didn't like seeing you cry," his hand trailed up to her scalp, "or frown," and gently ran his fingers through her hair.
He laid his head down on her bed and stared at her with those vibrant, sparkling eyes; eyes that could see everything she could never see.
She touched his cheek gently, "I didn't like not feeling you."
Her whole body shivered. Satoru was here, in front of her, and she was still cold.
"Are you still cold?"
She nodded.
Never letting go of her, he kicked off his shoes and climbed under the blanket with her. He wrapped his legs around hers as her arms wrapped under his uniform jacket.
With his hand still tangled in her hair, he said, "Better?"
His heartbeat had returned to her. They were beating in unison again.
"Better," she hummed. "You?" She asked.
His lips pressed softly on her forehead, "Much better." He tugged her in closer into his chest.
She smiled.
She was warm again.
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@whatamidoing89 @mr-underhills-things
Part 1: what you see, i see
Part 3: you know i adore you
Part 4: i'm crazier for you
Part 5: baby, you're the life of the party
Part 6: something's made your eyes go cold
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webshooterrr9 · 9 months ago
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Punk!Miguel AU Part 2
(not proofread LMAO)
Okay but like...
punk!miguel who couldn't stop thinking about that day he shared with you. and even in the moment, with all your clenching and whining, he knew he wouldn't. so he made sure to get your number afterwards... just in case.
punk!miguel who frequently stood by his front window, looking down from his apartment as he watched you walk home from work everyday. thankfully for him, your building was right next to his, so you were sure to pass by his view five days a week.
punk!miguel who figured out that you work as the manager for a family owned cafe a few blocks away, a role that was passed down to you after a few generations. he wasn't typically a man for coffee and pastries, but he'd make an exception for his damsel in distress... just in case.
punk!miguel who just so conveniently happened to stop buy your cafe, just before closing hours. this wasn't the first time he's visited since he found your place of work, but it was the first time he's given you more than a shit-eating grin and a sly comment.
"You gonna hurry up with that muffin, or are you gonna keep me here all night?" you ask from behind the counter, hands on your hips. he looked over from the table he was sitting at and just flashed you a smirk. you two were the only people here, given that it was almost 11pm and completely dark outside.
"Oh, you know me," he said turning in his seat to face you. "Never one to rush, always want to savor my meal." he gave you a little wink, and you rolled your eyes.
"Whatever, take as long as you want, I'm gonna clean up for closing." you pulled a broom from the corner and started sweeping the little crumbs in your kitchenette, while Miguel went back to "savoring" his chocolate muffin.
The door to the building swung open. "Nobody move!"
You were frozen in your place, almost dropping the broom. A large man, though not as large as Miguel, dressed in dark sweats was aiming a gun at you, with a fierce look in his eyes.
Great, now you're being robbed.
You carefully set the broom down at your feet, and hold your hands up. The retail counter did very little to make you feel safe from the intruder. "Listen, I don't know what you want from me, okay? If you're looking for money, I don't have any. Nobody really pays in cash these days and-"
"Just shut up and empty the register!"
You were quick to do as he said, even though robbing a small cafe in the 21st century didn't seem very profitable - you didn't say anything though, out of fear of being shot. You gathered all the money from the cash register, pulling out a hundred dollars or so in change. "Do... do you want it in a bag?" you asked, visibly sweating.
The man shook the gun in front of your face. "Just give me the damn money! And don't you dare try to call the cops, I'll shoot 'ya right where you stand, lady."
Unfortunately for him, the intruder was too distracted by getting the cash from you that he didn't notice the large delinquent behind him, holding a fire extinguisher above his head.
With a loud WHACK the intruder fell to the ground, dropping his gun in the process. Miguel stood above him, glaring down at the unconscious man, who now definitely had a concussion. The look in Miguel's eyes was something you had never seen before, well, except for that other time he happened to save you.
He placed the fire extinguisher on the counter and looked towards you. "You alright, chiquita?" he asked, although before you could answer, he reached over the counter to grab some ribbon.
"You tie up your little goodie bags with these, right?" you nod. He takes a few handfuls of the blue ribbons and makes quick work wrapping them in knots around the robber's wrists. Miguel kicks the weapon away. "These aren't exactly handcuffs, but they'll work for the time being. Call the cops, bonita. I'll make sure he doesn't get up." Miguel gives you a reassuring smile, before kneeling down in front of the man.
Red and blue lights fading away told you that the cops had successfully restrained the armed intruder and were on their way to detain him. You had stepped out from behind the counter and slumped down on the floor in front of it, leaning your head back against it. Miguel chuckles as you sigh, and he sits down next to you.
"That was not how I expected the night to end." you huffed, rubbing your temples in exhaustion. He flashed you a knowing smirk. "Oh? And how did you expect it to end, hermosa? ¿Querías hacer el amor conmigo, hmm?" you scoffed as he gave your shoulder a little nudge.
"Don't even go there, that's not what I was talking about, chulo." you huff once more, earning another laugh from him. "What I meant was I wasn't expecting to get robbed today."
"Almost robbed, guapa. I saved you, just like last time."
You smirk. "Yes, just like last time."
You both share a look, one that reveals your growing feelings for one another. Your heart was beating rapidly. You knew where this was going.
"So, is my damsel gonna give me the same reward as last time? Or, are my heroics undeserving of praise?" you bite your lip, and he leans in closer. So close, in fact, that his arm was rubbing up against yours - the tattooed skin heavily contrasting your blank canvas.
"Hmm, it depends. I don't really wanna walk all the way home..." a mischievous look shines in your eyes, and this time it's his heart that pounds. "Will you carry me?"
Another one of his laughs. "No, chica, I won't carry you... we can have our fun right here."
Oh.
Oh.
>:)
Tags for those who requested this: @mybvalentine @animequeen4 @bluesunleaf @nakimushiohime @loser-alert @stopxplease
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cwritesforfun · 9 months ago
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Regina George x Fem!Reader: NYC
I think we’re all obsessed with Renee Rapp as Regina George …
Y/N = Your Name (I will use this sparingly)
I am trying second-person pov for the first time, don't be mad if it sucks.
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hehehehehe
Regina's POV
I think the only person I've ever loved is Y/N. I always thought I would know what real love was when it happened to me, but I realized it too late. I lost Y/N because we just experimented with each other, didn't want to commit to dating or coming out, moved to different schools, made new friends, and graduated high school. I texted her one time and it was to tell her congratulations on graduating and she texted me the same. She even moved houses, which I didn't know until I drove there today and there was a new family there and they had no idea where the previous owners lived. I tried calling her, but it gave me her voicemail and I don't even know what to say. Where is she?! And on top of all of this, Mom is taking me to New York City because I've been moping. I don't want to travel.
Your POV ... 1 week later...
You're working at a coffee shop and you smile. You have been so happy in New York. Dad had us move out to Brooklyn to take over his brother's coffee shop and he's been really great. He's grown so much in the role of manager and owner. You work as the assistant manager on weekends and you're in charge of events. You have fun.
It's Saturday and the day has been buzzing with orders. You have never seen so many lattes made or bagels ordered. Truly, this is insane. To promote the business, you had done a 2-hour 50% deal on lattes and your regular customers went CRAZY then they told their friends. Dad would be proud.
You are sitting on your phone eating your bagel during lunch reading your book when you hear a familiar voice order an iced oat milk latte and a bagel with strawberry cream cheese. That's so fetch. You exclaim, "Regina George, is that really you?" She whips her head around to face you and her jaw drops. You say, "You should join me if you're not busy." She nods, grabs her order, and sits in the seat across from me.
You exclaim, "I had no idea you were in New York City." She snaps, "I had no idea you moved. You never told me." You exclaim, "You could've asked one of those times you called me and didn't leave me a voicemail." She asks, "I never knew what to say. If you got those, why didn't you call me back?" You answer, "I didn't know what to say either. I could've told you about the sudden move and made you plan a visit, but I guess I never thought you would agree after we stopped talking... I always felt bad about that. I didn't want to stop being around you. It was just easier at the time than well doing what we were doing." She nods and says, "I missed you." You reply, "I missed you too. My lunch break is over in like 5 minutes, but would you want to hang out while you're in town? My dad made plans for him and me tonight, but maybe tomorrow we can hang out." She replies, "I will have to check with my mom, but I think tomorrow would work. Do you promise to answer if I call?" You nod and answer, "Yes." You both smile at each other and it's like times are like they were in high school. You were happy in high school when you were with Regina, but you never knew if what you did together would lead to something real. You felt like a second choice and it was alienating. Breaking off your fling with her was good for you because it let you be independent at your new school and it let you start to figure out who you were a little. You were bisexual and you were proud.
That night, as you finish getting ready for dinner, you finally ask your dad, "Who are we meeting for dinner? You've been very secretive about this whole night. You just said to dress nice. You have me scared." He hugs me and says, "You'll enjoy tonight. I have a 50/50 chance of being right about that. You look gorgeous tonight, let's head out. We don't want to be late." We leave our house and we make our way to this pizza place that we love that has this fancy upper floor overlooking the piano and more seating. Honestly, it just looks fancy. The food is not bad prices at all, haha. Dad just likes to romanticize our pizza dinners.
We take our normal seats and you watch the pianist play Mozart's Eine kleine Nachtmusik. You know this song on flute and you love it.
Dad exclaims, "Sweetie, our guests are here. Say hi." You turn around and you see Regina with her mom. You gasped and said, "Hi, I'm so confused. Why are you here? Dad, I saw her in our coffee shop today. Did you plan this?" Regina says, "I thought it was weird that we were meeting people in the city because we know no one. Well, except you two and even I just found that out today." Dad says, "Sit down and relax, ladies. Mrs. George and I talked a few weeks back about how it was weird you two hadn't seen each other in a while. We planned this trip when Mrs. George said that Regina had been moping around the house for months and her last happy memory was with dear Y/N." WTF?!? She hasn't been happy since I was hanging out with her?! Regina asks, "How long have you two been talking? Does dad know, mom?" Mrs. George says, "Honey, this is different than that time with John from down the street. This was just a friendly parent-to-parent talk about our kid's well-being. I don't romantically see Y/N's dad. We talk like once a month about finances because I don't get it and your dad hates talking to me about them." lol ... family drama ... Regina slouches and crosses her arms angrily. Shit, she is not happy about something. You used to be so good at reading her. You're out of practice.
Pizza arrives at the table and we all eat while making small talk. Regina refuses to look anyone in the eyes, she just keeps her head down and keeps quiet. You hate this. You want to talk to her, not our parents right now. You nudge her and ask, "Do you want to hang out with just me after this? I could try cheering you up if you'd let me." She answers, "Sure," before turning back to her pizza.
Once pizza winds down, you exclaim, "Hey Dad and Mrs. George, Regina and I are going to go out for a bit alone after this. We will be safe and we will let you know where we go and when we plan to go home." Mrs. George says, "Oh before you leave, I should say, Regina's suitcase is in your dad's car in case she wants to spend the night at your place." Regina snaps, "I'm right here, mom. You're talking about me like I'm not in the room." Mrs. George snaps, "I'm sorry Miss Didn't Say Anything During Dinner and Is Rude To People and Stares At Pizza." OH FUDGE ... You grab Regina's hand pulling her away from our parents and outside the restaurant.
Outside, we start walking and you realize you are still holding Regina's hand. She probably doesn't even want to be holding your hand. It's not like this is a date. You drop it and ask, "Are you in the mood for gelato?" She answers, "Sure." You reply, "Great, let's go. It's like 2 blocks from here."
We walk in comfortable silence until we get there. I open the door for Regina and she thanks me as she walks inside. My friend, Sam, is behind the counter and Sam exclaims "Y/N!!! It's good to see you again!!! Guess what?" You ask, "What's up, Sam?" Sam answers, "Josh asked me out!!" You smile and say, "OMG!!!! You'll have to tell me all about it. I'm so happy for you. This is Regina, by the way. And Regina, this is Sam." Sam waves and says, "Wow Regina, you're really pretty." Regina replies, "Thanks. Could I get a small raspberry gelato?" Sam nods and I say, "And could you get me a small dulce de leche gelato?" Sam nods and asks, "So Regina, are you in town visiting Y/N? She has been rather lonely without you. It's always about you, you know." Regina half-smiles and says "What kind of things did she say exactly?" Sam answers, "She said you were pretty and you are. She said you were her best friend for a long time and you both really liked spending time together. She was scared to commit and she wasn't ready to come out. She said you were her crush for a bit in high school. She said..." You quickly interrupt and say, "I think that is quite enough, Sam. How much is the gelato?" Sam answers, "$8.72." You pay for the gelato then sit in a booth away from Sam. You hear the door open and see two families walk in with little kids. At least Sam will be busy and won't pay attention to us for a bit.
You exclaim, "I know tonight's dinner was terrible, but I'm hoping I can still turn around your night and make it better." Regina asks, "Is it true?" You ask, "Is what true? You'll have to be more specific." Regina mumbles, "The crush on me." You say, "Yes, it is true. I liked you a lot when we were experimenting together and then we broke it all off. It was tough and I had to heal from that heartbreak, but I didn't realize it was heartbreak until I came to the realization that I romantically liked you. And then you were gone and then we graduated and I had to move and the timing was never right. But, I do know three things: I am bisexual and I like you a lot and the feelings never went away." She smiles widely and says, "God, if we weren't by your nosy friend and in a gelato shop, I'd kiss you." You ask, "So. the feeling is mutual then?" She answers, "Yes... I am lesbian though." You reply, "That's pretty cool." She laughs.
After gelato, we hold hands and walk to the Brooklyn Bridge. We were close to it anyway, so why not walk there?!? Haha! Besides, during the day there are tons of vendors, and at night, there are just lots of cars and busy people. You love living in the city. The city also looks beautiful all lit up at night.
As we stand at this pier looking out at the water, Regina asks, "Can we have that kiss now?" You turn to her and answer, "Yes." You kiss and it's like you're the city being lit up at night. You feel bright and you see your future.
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cosmos-coma · 4 months ago
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Hi i was wondering if you can do a Bucky fluffy angst (modern/college au if possible) where basically him and reader are friends through steve and both have a crush on each other but don't do anything about it considering bucky is sort of a playboy and thinks reader is way out of his league and reader is sort of shy and quiet and thinks bucky is way out of here league but get together in the end
College Crushes
A/N: WOW, I'm so sorry, This has been in my inbox for like 2 months and I just didn't realize???? sorry!! So I tried to write this one out as quick as I could!
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Words: 3011
Warnings: Little editing, Awkward goobers
Bucky Masterlist
Buy me a Coffee?
_________
“Y/n, did you hear what I said at all?” Your blond friend asked a small snort of laughter hidden in his voice. 
“Hmm,” you hummed, in something akin to agreement as you lifted your mug to take a sip. 
Steve smiled, but gave you a knowing look, even if you were too distracted to receive it. He knew your painting was due at the end of this week, hence why you had been spending so much time in the studio after class hours, getting lost in the smell of acrylic and the smallest brushstrokes.
“I said: ‘You know you’re drinking paint water, right…?’” He said, barely holding back his snicker.
“Uh huh…” You mumbled, “Yeah, I totally hear what you're saying….” you continued, taking a large sip from your mug, to which your face immediately soured, and quickly spit out the paint-clouded water back into your mug. “Oh, gross! Steve!!” you complained and wiped the dribble from your face, almost undoubtedly replacing it with yet another smear of paint.
Steve was fully laughing now, shaking his head at your accidental antics, “I tried to warn you…” 
You punched his shoulder lightly, delving into your own laughter as you reached for your actual drinking mug now, “Don't laugh at me…. Punk.” you grinned and took a much-needed sip from your new mug. Steve always had a good way of putting your shyness at ease. 
He only grinned and brushed off your ‘devastating assault’, “I really do think you’re just about done… I know you still think you have a lot left, but I’d hate to see you overwork something like this.” Steve nudges you, and he would know. The two of you met not long into your freshman year, the both of you being art majors and all. While Steve tended to focus on graphite and charcoal as his medium, you had your heart covered in paint splatters from the very start. Whether oil or acrylics you found your home smoothing them across a canvas even if they didn’t always end up how you liked. 
You were thankful to have Steve, not only for his friendship which brought you out of your shell,  but also for his artistic eye; Because of your difference in mediums, Steve was always one of the first to be able to tell you if you were beginning to lose your themes by doing too much and vice versa. 
You sighed and leaned back from your painting, looking over the piece as a whole instead of its individual parts, “You’re probably right…” You scratched some of the old paint off your hand and tilted your head to the side as you continued thoughtfully, “and I can always add to it after it's graded…. Okay, you’re right… You’re right!” you held up your hands in surrender as you started packing your things away. You knew a break was for the best, and your rumbling stomach firmly agreed. 
Steve snorted and stood up with his things, “Come on, let’s get lunch before our classes start. I’m buying.”
“Well, I’ll never say no to that,” you grinned and headed out as you finished packing up the last of your things.  
You smiled as you two walked down the busy sidewalk and out of campus toward your favorite lunch spot. You finally spoke up, “Sooo, What’s the catch here?”
“No catch,” Steve smiled at you simply, “I’m just trying to be a friend worth their salt, you know?”
Steve was always a great friend, but today he was being awfully nice… maybe even too nice? As you glanced over you could see the smallest glint in the corner of his eyes. “I dunno…. “ you drawled out as you bumped him, “buying me lunch at my favorite spot when it's already so far out of our way..? Seems suspicious to me,” you observed casually with a quick shrug. 
For a moment his perfect smile faltered and his far-too-honest and good-hearted nature got the best of him, “So… I know you’re not really a party person…”
“Steve…” You groaned.
He held his hands up, “But hear me out! It won't be too loud, and there’ll be plenty of people there…. Chances are you won't have to talk to anyone if you don't really want to, but I thought it would be a nice way to get out on a Saturday night…” Steve tried to argue. 
Pursing your lips you gave him a long look, searching him for something else, “Why do you really want me to go, Steve?” 
The blond man sighed as if he really thought he might’ve had you that time, “Bucky is gonna be there….”
You shook your head so quickly you thought you’d get whiplash, “Nope. No. I’m not doing it. Sorry Steve, I can’t. I think I would actually rather drink the paint water again.”
Bucky had been, hm- how do you put this lightly? From your very first meeting, Bucky had consumed your thoughts and shaken your heart. Steve had introduced the two of you a while back now, wanting the two of his closest friends to finally get to know each other. But once you two finally met you just clammed up. You didn't even mean to! But you saw those unbelievably blue eyes and you heard his full-bodied laugh and you haven’t caught your breath since. But of course, you weren't the only one who felt this way, and you'd be silly to think so. Everyone wanted a piece of Bucky, whether for just a night, a week, or something longer and you knew you had nothing on your competition. You were far too quiet, you always had paint somewhere on your face, and you were anything but a party person. You preferred to spend your evening in with whatever takeout you could afford that week- and maybe a small game night if you were feeling especially social. But You were leagues away from what Bucky deserved, let alone from the people he’d picked and chosen from before. Yet Steve still seemed relentless in his will to bring you two together since you’d confided your feelings in him. 
He sighed and plucked out his wallet to pay for your food, “Y/n, please? I know you’re a little nervous when it comes to Buck, but there’ll be plenty of other people around to buffer and It's been a long time since we’ve all been together…” he said, looking over at you.
God, you shouldn’t have looked at those big blue golden retriever eyes…. And following a moment of hesitation, you nodded, “I… I guess I can- yeah, okay, I’ll go… just for 20 minutes,” you finally caved with a sigh, thinking only, “What am I getting myself into?”
—----
Taking a deep breath you stared at the house before you. The party wasn’t crazy or overflowing yet, but there was still a handful of people outside already trying to get a break from the noise and crowd. 
“Just 20 minutes?” Steve asked beside you, his well-meaning smile giving you an iota of comfort.
You nodded, giving him a small reassuring smile and a thumbs up. You smoothed out your sweater beneath your hands, it was your favorite one- comfortable, didn't have any smudges on it, and you thought the color looked rather nice on you. It was just 20 minutes. You could go in and awkwardly talk about something for 20 minutes, right? And if not- Well, there’s always punch.
With a short breath of confidence, you headed through the doors. A small sea of people spread out about as far as you could see, with little gaps here and there for people to sneak through or join in the already existing conversations. You bobbed your head gently along with the music, searching the crowds as you made your way through the dimly lit rooms.
It was an achingly slow start to 20 minutes, most of your time being spent sipping punch while Steve talked to anybody and everybody as if he was personally running for mayor. So you stood quietly, nodding and smiling when people laughed and making expressions that seemed to match the conversation as you looked around for anyone you knew. The whole buzz of endless conversation seemed to get monotonous and verge on overwhelming as you listened in, until a particular laugh rang out, one that was hearty and familiar and made your heart rattle in its wake. 
You turned to confirm your suspicions and lo and behold there he was. Across the room, through the sea of people, you could see Bucky standing there like a lighthouse promising safe harbor.   His blue eyes squinted with laughter as he flashed the whitest smile and made some retort you hate that you couldn’t hear. Just the sight of him made your whole body heat up pleasantly, your lips splitting into a wide smile as your eyes just refused to leave him. 
It was only when he happened to glance over that you realized you were still staring, but he didn’t seem bothered. No, he simply grinned and raised his hand above the crowd to get your attention, urging you to stay where you were while he made his way over. 
Only his path got intercepted. 
A bright, bubbly girl maneuvered up beside him with no problem from the crowd, her arms wrapping around his bicep as she pulled him in possessively close. If that didn’t make your stomach turn enough, the kiss she planted right on his cheek surely did. 
You couldn’t even think enough hide the way your face fell, your whole posture deflating beneath you as your stomach dropped to the floor. “Hey, Steve…?” your voice squeaked out, your throat closed like a vice as you couldn’t pull your eyes away. “I’m gonna walk home, okay? I’ll see you later, I just- I need to go…” You managed to get out, not waiting around to hear out whatever argument he had to urge you to stay. 
“Y/n? Y/n, wait-” The blond urged as he looked around, immediately spotting Bucky and the unfamiliar girl he was trying to shake off, “Wait- It’s dark out, don’t walk alone!” Steve called back to you, but his only answer was the click of the closing door over the murmurs of the crowd. He went to say his briefest goodbyes and run after you when he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder. “Buck?” 
“I’ll go after her,” Bucky assured him, his face worried and serious as you ran off into the night by yourself, “You stay here, I’ll walk her home.” he finished before quickly making his own way out the front door and down the dark street. 
----
You huffed an angry sigh and shoved your hands deep into your all-too-shallow pockets. “Why am I even upset?” you thought to yourself with a biting tone, “you’re the one who's out of his league! You’ve said so yourself! Shouldn’t you just be happy he has someone that will be better for him…?”
“I hate parties…” you mumbled as you passed beneath the streetlight, pulling your foot back to kick the small rock resting on the sidewalk. “Aaaand of course I missed…. ” you think bitterly as your foot whiffs right past the rock, not even a bit of movement to prove your effort. 
“Hey…” A low familiar voice sounded out behind you, its owner coming closer as they jogged up to your side “What did that rock ever do to you?” Bucky grinned at you, half joking as he fell into step beside you. 
“Bucky…?” you breathed, your mood already lightening at the mere presence of it, but you quickly tamped it down, “Oh, right well… The rock…uh, tried to mug me” you half-heartedly joked, “ Really put me between a rock and a hard place, if you know what I mean. But don't worry, I beat it off.” You said with an awkward laugh, internally kicking yourself for such a bad joke and with a pun to top it off at that. 
But Bucky still snorted a laugh, his thumb jabbing back in the rock's direction as you both continued on, “You want me to go back there and kick it for you?” 
You grinned and shook your head, “No, No, that's okay… I think it's learned its lesson…”
You two walked in comfortable silence for a moment, a small smile resting on your face, but inside your heart still weighed heavy upon you. 
“Why did you leave...?” Bucky finally asked and for a moment you swore you heard something akin to hurt in his voice, “I had finally gotten a chance to see you again.” he said, quickly adding, “I just mean… it’s been a while since you, me, and Steve got to hang out. I, ah… guess I’ve sort of missed it with everything going on…”
You tried to ignore the way your heart squeezed in your chest and looked down at your wringing hands as you answered, “I just… It was getting too much for me,” you lied, thinking back to the confident kiss that girl planted on his cheek, “and I didn’t want to distract you from your time with… other people.”
Bucky furrowed his brow as he listened and stepped in closer to you as you hit a dark stretch of broken streetlamps. He was so close now, you could smell the faint scent of cologne coming up from his jacket. Your hands, both chilled by the late fall air, brushed together as you walked in time, though neither of you were brave enough to reach to the other. 
“You mean that girl from before?” He motioned back to the now-distant party as he spoke, “I’m not even sure who that was.” He laughed a bit, “she said her friends dared her to kiss me, but I’m not sure….” 
The weight of your heart eased significantly as you took in a quiet breath of relief, “that seems… huh…” you said as you frowned and rounded the corner, you could see the porchlight your house now and the keys jingled around your pocket as you tried to fish out the right one. 
“I agree…” Bucky said, letting out an exaggerated shudder. Despite the lights now populating your last few steps home Bucky’s protective presence did not waver, his shoulders brushing against yours now and again as you stepped up onto the porch and took out your keys.
Despite fumbling with them you finally manage to open the front door and take half a step inside, “Thank you for walking me home, Buck,” you smiled, “and threatening to beat up a rock for me...” 
That pearly white grin nearly blinded you despite the dark of night, “Of course, I’m always happy to rough up a pebble for you- but uh, I might draw the line at boulders, just so you know.” 
You bit your lip as you chucked, feeling butterflies bounce around your stomach uncontrollably, “Noted…. I should probably let you go before Steve does something stupid and heroic… But I’ll see you soon?” you proposed as you leaned into the doorframe, “Goodnight, Buck…”
He couldn't restrain the grin that parted his lips at the prospect of seeing you again so soon, and seemed to stumble over himself as he backed down the short staircase, “Right… right, I should- Goodnight, y/n…” His grin never left as he finally turned to leave…
… But something stopped him at the bottom of the stairs, “Wait-” He interjected into the silence. His lips tightened as he seemed to fight with himself for a moment, before finally turning back to you with a look of nervous determination in his eyes.
“Y/n, I…” his words paused as he searched for the next ones, his whole demeanor had shifted, not quite the suave confident soul you had always seen, but an endearingly awkward version of him. “I don't know if I’ll ever have the guts to say this again, but I- Y/n, I really like you…” Bright blue eyes met yours as you continued. 
“You’re thoughtful and genuine, and you always have paint on your face- even now-” He laughed softly, pointing to his ear.
“Oh, Shit-” you mumbled, rubbing it off quickly. 
“But it’s what I love about you. You do what you love and you pour yourself into it every time. And even though you’re quiet, when you do speak your words say volumes. You're funny, and kind, and just… so far beyond me that I know I don’t have a chance, but I just had to try why I still had the nerve.” He rushed to finish, ending with a deep breath as he urged himself to wait for your answer. 
Your face burned with the full heat of the sun as you tried to take in Bucky's words, He thought you were out of his league????
“You… I…. “ You had to laugh, your heart so unbelievably light as it all really hit you- he liked you!  You! 
“Bucky, are you serious..? I’ve had a crush on you from the moment I met you. You smiled and laughed and I haven’t been the same ever since.” You rubbed your blushing cheeks, trying to will away the embarrassing hue as you continued, softer, “But you could have anyone- there’s always people falling at your feet, I just figured I could never compete with the likes of them…” 
Wait, you liked him too? You said you liked him too?? With newfound confidence Bucky took another step forward, his fingers reaching out to you in invitation, which you gladly accepted. “You’re right… You could never compete with them,” he started, “ It simply wouldn’t be fair to make them compete in something they could never dream of winning.”
Your cheeks hurt from the sheer force of your smile and as you looked down at your linked fingers you swore your heart would fly away. 
“Um… Bucky, can I-”
“Please” He rushed, his own grin spanning from ear to ear as he leaned in for a kiss.
________________
General Bucky Taglist:
@writingmysanity @simpxinnie @goldylions @yeehawbrothers
If I missed or accidentally tagged you lmk! Wanna be added General Bucky taglist? Please ask/DM me!
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yawn-junn · 5 months ago
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love your work! hcs on zb1 when they have a crush? 🌹🌹
𓂃𖦹๋࣭ Have you seen my boyfriend ?⭑。˚
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‧˚₊•┈Much obliged too: Zb1, anon
‧˚₊•┈Inscription: I hope you enjoy this is my first time writing for Zb1
‧˚₊•┈Synopsis: their reaction to having a crush on you (this is all my imagination so don't take this seriously) THIS IS PART ONE(1)
‧˚₊•┈Cauntionary Tale: jealousy : overthinking : food : embarrassment : stress : fluster :
‧˚₊•┈Taglist: no one yet but send an ask or message me if you wanna join
‧˚₊•┈Part 2
06/19/24
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ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ #Matthew
He buys things that remind him of you, and or look like you.
ᯓMatthew's room was jam-packed with random things, not fitting his vibe at all as he invited you in, you gasped seeing an entire collection of plushies "I didn't know you liked that!" You exclaimed holding up something from you're favorite cartoon as you admired the colorful plushies, Matthew gave himself a mental pat on the back "yeah it's cute right?" He asked sitting next to you as you frantically nodded, "it's my favorite!" You said excitedly wiggling slightly, he pretended to be shocked "hm..well if that case you can have them I have extras" he said with a smile making you lightly kick you're feet as you thanked him.
ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ #Taerae
He's very observant, such as he'll notice if even the slightest change happened to you.
ᯓTaerae brought his usual coffee to you, sitting next to you on the small couch "oh? You cut you're hair?" He asked softly eyeing it, you looked at him shocked "yeah..is it noticable?" You asked gently petting you're hair, he shook his head no sitting back in the seat "you look good" he complimented making you're cheeks flush, like usual, he noticed you're blush turning his head he smiled sipping his drink proud of himself.
ִֶָ ����⊹ ִֶָ #Ricky
Over time he'll learn the things you like, such as food or random items.
ᯓIt was around lunch time, you were sitting at one of the many tables around, focusing on you're work, having completely forgotten to eat. Ricky walked in with a plastic bag from a very familiar fast food joint, with a drink in his hand. Making his way over to you're table he sat the stuff down "here" he said softly unloading everything for you, his tall frame towering over you and you're work, almost intimidating if it wasn't for his kind gestures "how did you-" you tried only to be cut off when he put food to you're lips "dont ask just eat"
ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ #Gyuvin
Usually he teases everyone but with you, he's too flustered to even think
ᯓ"Gyuvin" you tapped his arm "I've been calling you for the past 10 minutes" you informed him with a worried gaze, he giggled a sound you've never heard from him before. Almost lovesick kind of giggle "sorry I zoned out" he said blinking his eyes, it was almost scary how he was acting, looking to the side you seen Ricky looking absolutely disgusted, focusing you're gaze back on Gyuvin he spoke "you're really pretty" he said a small smile growing on his face, all you could do was be flustered as you covered you're face, not used to the strange behavior.
ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ #Gunwook
He tries to act cool only to embarrass himself immensely
ᯓGunwook waited in an area he knew you'd pass by, seeing as you do it almost everyday, putting his hands in his pockets he tried to leaned against the wall, in his overthinking stressed out state. He ended up falling backwards on to the gravel just as you passed by, making you gasp stopping infront of him quickly going to help him, setting all you're stuff down as fast as you could. "Oh my goodness! Are you ok?" You asked him offering you're hand out for him, his cheeks flushed and his eyes widen embarrassment caging around him, he quickly nodded grabbing you're hand, "yeah I'm ok...thank you" he whispered trying to disappear from the embarrassment, after you made sure he was ok, you left unknowing of the boy who sank back down to the ground covering his face from embarrassment.
ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ #Yujin (he's a MINOR don't read if over 18)
He's very playful with you, such as teasing you about you're looks or you're height even tho he thinks you're the prettiest being alive (because you are)
ᯓYujin and you were on you're way to the convince store the time was around 2am, the both of you suddenly getting hungry for stuff that wasn't at his dorm, holding hands you two made you're way through the warm night, Yujin chuckled "woah? Who said you were pretty?" He joked about something you two were talking about, you reached with you're free hand hitting his stomach "shut up, you literally messaged me last night about how pretty I was" you said matter-of-factly pointing you're finger in the air, he laughed "hm I had a moment of weakness" he joked pulling you down a little bit making you laugh, the street was filled with non stop teasing and laughing.
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THE RABBIT IS MY FRIENDS DONT USE WITHOUT PERMISSION!!!!
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