#i cried over Il-nam FOR WHAT

[chaoticdazefire-new]

Yoo his role is actually so perfect. Works for Front Man, probably patrols the island making sure no one finds it-or is the one transporting the organs (maybe both?)- but it explains why they haven't been able to find the island yet! Bro has been steering them the wrong way on purpose & saying "let's go back" when they get close to the island.. obviously In-ho didn't mean to kill Jun-ho, if he did it would've been a head shot. So as soon as they left the cliff he probably contacted Park & told him to go save him. & its the perfect way to have a middle man giving you all the info on how your brother is trying to find the island & keep his ass going in circles 😭 well played Front Man, well played.

[passionforfiction]

Under the Queen's Umbrella

This is a beautiful series. I smiled, laughed and cried. This is the story of a mother who loves her children and will fight to the teeth to protect them. As a mother myself, I could understand her feelings and her actions. Queen Im Hwa Ryeong is an intelligent woman, street smart, and she has learned to play the politics game to protect her five sons. He eldest, the Crown Prince and his own wife, little boy and his youngest on the way are her pride and joy. He is the model child everyone would want to have. She worries about his health.

When the king decides to look for a substitute for the Crown Prince's assistant, the Queen will have to prepare her other four carefree sons so they can show they are just as worthy as their other half-brothers. But as she tries to do so without alarming them, she runs around inside and outside the palace looking for them.

Her second son, Grand Prince Seong Nam, was taken away from her when he was born. She was able to bring him home after years of living outside like a commoner. He feels like an outsider inside the palace and likes to train outside, but he loves his brothers, and cherishes his relationship with his older brother.

Grand Prince Muan is a young man in love with a woman of low birth. His mother is constantly getting him out of her home and bring him back to the palace.

Grand Prince Kye Seong is a quiet young man who brings peace to his mother but carries a secret that could kill him.

Grand Prince Il Young is in his early teens and too young to care about politics.

As the political intrigues unravel, we see her relationship with her sons strengthen. This a woman who will protect, not only her children, but the king's other sons. . . She is strong and flexible, accepting and a problem solver.

I liked her relationship with her sons. How she interacts with each and gives them the support they need while also giving them wings. I also like her relationship with the King. Out of all his wives, the audience can see a special bond between them. He values her opinion and respects her. She respects him, although there are things she will always keep away from him in order to protect her sons. She is indeed her son's secret keeper and their support.

I really love what the title symbolizes. The umbrella she puts over her boys' heads when it rains and what it all means.

I truly love this story!

[leia-writes]

These Violent Delights Have Violent Ends

hwang in-ho | front man x female reader

Chapter 13: Dancing With Our Hands Tied

warnings - violence, blood

18+ ONLY

song - dancing with our hands tied by taylor swift

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In-ho stood quietly in the elevator as he made his way to the 7th floor of the Sky Building. Everything that happened in the past 24 hours weighed heavily on his mind. The host had separated you two after he forced In-ho to torture you. You were still held hostage in the room while In-ho was ordered to check on Il-nam.

He lightly stretched his arm muscles. He was sore and stiff all over from hurting you, and it made him die a little inside every time he noticed. It made him feel constantly on the edge of insanity. He simply couldn’t process in his mind that he hurt you like that.

In-ho entered the large room and noticed Il-nam’s makeshift hospital room in the corner. As he approached, he knew Il-nam was dead. The machines were still on and sounding off a high pitched drone. In-ho unplugged the machines and stood there in silence for a moment. He noticed Il-nam’s eyes were still open, so he gently pushed them down.

He looked out the window solemnly. Il-nam’s passing was just another indication of how things were changing. Life would never be like it was before, but one thing would stay the same. He knew the two of you could never escape the Squid Game organization without putting up a fight. And anything was worth it to save your life.

He feared time was running out and the two of you would have to do something quick. You were up against so much, much more than you’d ever know, but he knew you had to try.

He sighed to himself and walked out, his mind churning.

~~~

As In-ho made his way back to the island, the host made his way to the room you were being held in. You were still tied to the chair, so you sat there waiting until someone came back after In-ho had left. The host eyed you up and down and chuckled.

“He really did a number on you, didn’t he?”

You glared at him, pure anger coursing through your veins. You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. Nothing you could say would be satisfying enough to express how you felt.

The host approached you and roughly grabbed your face. You hadn’t moved your arms, making it seem like you were still tied up, but the moment he touched you, you grabbed his hand and pushed his fingers backwards, instantly breaking a few of them. The host cried out in pain and slapped you with his other hand. He pried his hand from you and swiftly pulled out his gun, pointing it at you.

“Fucking bitch. I should kill you for that.”

You spat, tasting blood in your mouth. “You’re just a coward behind that gun.”

The host chuckled. “And you’ll still obey me under it.”

“You won’t kill me, or you would have already.”

“You know, you’re actually right about that. I have bigger plans for you.”

“Sure you do.”

“Don’t fuck around or he’s dead.”

You glared at him, but internally your heart dropped, fearful of what was to come. The host called for the guards who had been apparently standing outside the door. He ordered them to untie your legs and tie your hands together, his gun directed at you the entire time. The guards grabbed you and you followed the host out of the room, all the way outside towards the beach. A small boat was sitting in the water nearby.

It was nighttime, but the moon was full and bright. As you stood there, the host called for In-ho on his radio. He had just returned from the city. You waited in silence, apprehensive.

As In-ho approached, the host dismissed the guards. In-ho kept his face neutral but internally he was frightened for you. The host pushed his gun into the back of your head and ordered the two of you on to the boat, following behind you.

“Turn on the boat and go,” he said to In-ho.

“Where?”

“Until I say stop.”

In-ho sighed and started the boat, directing it out towards the open water. As you got further and further away from the island, dread started to consume you. You felt the finality of the moment and knew you were most likely going to die. The host seemed to view you simply as a pawn at this point to get In-ho to do what he wanted. With you gone, you wondered what In-ho’s fate would be as well. You cried to yourself but stayed silent. Whatever the host had planned would definitely lead to your death, but maybe In-ho could make it out alive, and you didn’t want to make things harder for him.

After a few minutes, the host ordered In-ho to stop. The three of you sat there as the boat idled. The host pushed you to the bottom of the boat on your knees. As you looked up, the host pointed his gun at In-ho.

“Kill her.”

In-ho looked back at the host, stunned. He stayed put. Neither you or he said a word.

“Do it or I will, and then I’ll kill you.”

In-ho looked down and back at you. You could sense every bit of fear on his face. Everything you felt leading up to this was coming true. No matter what, you were going to die there. Your heart broke with every passing second, not because you were going to die but because In-ho would have to experience this pain because of you.

As he looked at you, his heart was also breaking. At that moment you looked a mess, your features swollen from the beatings you’d just gotten, but he could only see you as you were in his favorite memories, smiling and beautiful. He would have given anything up to go back to that moment with you. Tears started flowing down his face.

You noticed the sadness and pity in his eyes and looked down. You didn’t want to make this harder for him. “In-ho, just… save yourself. Don’t die because of me.”

In-ho let out a sob at your words, his vision blurring from his tears. He took his gun out and cocked it, the sound making you jump. You shut your eyes, waiting for the inevitable.

You thought about your life and what brought you to this point. In the past you’d gone back and forth on whether you regretted playing the games, and joining the organization, but you knew now that you’d do it all again. You’d go through the same thing over and over for eternity if it meant you got to be with In-ho, even for a short time.

Your short life at least had some meaning, even if it was fleeting, you thought.

You stayed there in silence for a few moments, waiting for the inevitable, but all of a sudden you felt shuffling between In-ho and the host, rocking the boat. Immediately after, you heard a gunshot.

It took you a few moments to realize you were still conscious. You hadn’t been shot. You heard heavy breathing and a body fall next to you. You were convinced it was In-ho who was shot, and the host was going to kill you now.

You started to uncontrollably shake and tears were steadily falling down your face. You slowly raised your head and opened your eyes. The tears kept falling but your vision slowly cleared.

It was In-ho.

You cried out in relief. He fell to his knees and wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you tight. You pressed your face into the crook of his neck, In-ho doing the same, the two of you crying.

He moved away from you and held your face, gently stroking you and pushing your hair out of the way. “I’m so sorry. I never want to hurt you. I promise I’ll never hurt you again.”

You cried, and kissed him. “I know. I love you.” You held each other again for a few moments, slowly calming down.

You looked next to you, the lifeless body of the host lying there. In-ho quickly grabbed him by his coat and shoved him over the side of the boat. You felt immense relief as you watched him sink.

In-ho sat next to you, the two of you leaning back to rest. He wrapped his arm around you and you rested your head on his shoulder.

You sighed and looked up, observing the night sky like you had just several moments ago. “We can leave now, right?”

In-ho held you tighter. “I think we need to try and take everything down before we can do that.”

You looked at him, concerned. “How can we do that?”

In-ho stayed facing forward, clearly overwhelmed by his thoughts. “I’ve been thinking… We can try to destroy everything with the emergency self-destruct system.”

After a few moments of pondering his words, you asked, “If we do that, will they not come looking for us?” You knew the Squid Game organization was international. Would someone else come looking for you?

“I… I don’t know. You know they’re almost everywhere, but the whole thing started here. I don’t know what it’s like beyond… this. But if we destroy it, it might be less likely.”

The two of you sat there in silence. All you wanted was to run away now on that small boat, away from the island forever. But it was worth it to take it down if it meant you could really be free.

You held his hand and looked at him. “Let’s do it.”

~~~

You made it back to the island and to your residence with no problems. No one knew what happened on the boat and the two of you were determined to keep it that way.

You and In-ho decided to take the night to rest, getting undressed in the bathroom and showering together. You were exhausted and barely wanted to stand up. With the host finally dead, you felt like you could actually relax, for a little while at least.

As the water covered you two, In-ho gently wiped traces of blood from your face. He looked so awfully sad at you, it made you start to cry. He was so overwhelmed with shame he didn’t know what to say, so he just kissed you over and over, hoping he could make you feel even the tiniest bit better.

He moved from stroking your face to your hair, making sure it was saturated. He began to wash it for you, being as gentle as possible. You held him close the entire time he helped you.

After you were both cleaned up, you stood there holding each other, letting the water cover you. You looked up at him, your face resting on his chest.

“Don’t feel so bad about it, okay? You had to. I don’t blame you.”

He sighed and leaned his head down further. He didn’t say anything but his face said it all. He couldn’t stop himself from replaying the dreadful memory over and over in his head. It was so crushing on his mind he thought he would lose touch with reality. So he just held you tighter, promising to you repeatedly he’d never hurt you again.

After the shower, you climbed into bed together, falling asleep quickly. Tomorrow you’d execute your plan and, hopefully, finally be free from all of this.

~~~

The next day you packed what little you had and made plans to detonate the bombs in the VIP tunnels. Once the bombs were set, you’d have 3 minutes to escape before they were activated.

Since the host was gone, In-ho was able to prevent players from being kidnapped. He instructed the recruiters to proceed as they had before. It wouldn’t matter whether they decided to play or not after today, since it would all be destroyed.

A few hours before you were going to execute your plan, you and In-ho were notified of the arrival of VIPs and a special visitor. It was unexpected and immediately put you on edge. Did they know about the host? Your mind raced as the two of you approached the helicopter landing pad, anxiously awaiting your visitors.

You saw the usual VIPs exit with their golden masks, and then another visitor with a strange mask. It looked to be made of stone, faint cracks on the side of it, painted to look like the faces of renaissance paintings. The man had jet black hair behind the mask, and he was wearing all black except for a dark red suit coat.

He approached you and In-ho with the VIPs behind him. He eyed the two of you. “Where is the host?” He had a thick Italian accent.

You glanced at In-ho, trying to hide your worry even though you were wearing your mask. In-ho kept looking forward. “We don’t know, we haven’t seen him today.”

The man slowly nodded his head. “We haven’t heard from him, and the games are to start soon.”

Internally you started getting nervous. His disappearance being known to others so quickly was not a good sign.

In-ho seemingly stayed calm. “I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sure you’ll be able to speak to him today.”

Everyone stayed silent for a few moments. It seemed as if the man wanted to say more, but decided against it. He reached his hand out towards In-ho. “I apologize for not introducing myself. I’m the Overseer.”

You held your breath. You’d heard very little of the Overseer, but you never expected to meet him in real life. This was not good.

The Overseer was essentially the head of the entire global Squid Game organization. When Il-nam and his colleagues created the Squid Games in South Korea, one of the VIPs back then wished to expand the games to countries all over the world. That VIP was now the Overseer.

He was known for being a ruthless man. You’d heard from casual conversations between the VIPs of stories of him torturing players, changing rules, and even making the guards participate in their own games. He seemed similar to the host, if not worse.

You knew this could completely change your plans, but it could also work in your favor. If you were going to destroy everything, might as well take the head of the whole organization out while you were at it.

The two of you led the Overseer and VIPs to the lounge, letting them settle into their rooms. You and In-ho made your way outside, under the guise of looking for the host. It was too risky to talk about anything inside now. You had no idea what the Overseer was capable of.

You walked to your cliffside spot together, standing and looking out on the ocean. Just several hours ago you’d been out there with the host, convinced you were about to die. You held In-ho’s hand tight.

“You saved my life.”

In-ho looked at you solemnly. He scoffed. “Barely.”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “No. You did.”

He sighed. “We should stay out here as long as possible before we go in. If we can get the bombs to detonate while he’s in there…”

“That’ll be even better.”

He looked at you and nodded. “There’s two bombs to activate. We’ll do it at the same time and then escape with the diving gear, take the boat, and get out of here.”

“Alright. And where will we go after that?”

He squeezed your hand. “Anywhere… almost.” You both knew you couldn’t be seen in the city. It was best to just take In-ho’s boat and go out of the country, as far away as possible.

You looked at him. “We’ve been through so much… Once we get through this, we’ll be okay. I know it.”

He looked at you and slightly smiled, though sadly. “I promise I’ll get us out of here.”

You kissed him. “I know.”

~~~

You made your way back inside once it was time to set the bombs off. Gathering your things, you opened the cabinet door, revealing the entrance to the VIP passage. You took a deep breath before going down the passage first, slowly climbing down the ladder, with In-ho following above you.

You both approached the bomb and set off the timer, giving you 3 minutes to escape. Immediately after activating it, you heard a commotion at the top of the passage. You could barely see who it was, but you heard the voice of the Overseer.

"What do you think you’re doing?!”

You froze in fear, but there was still time to get out. You and In-ho continued climbing down, but the Overseer began shooting at you two. You yelped at the sound of a bullet passing by, almost hitting you.

You and In-ho immediately drew your guns and began shooting back. There were a few moments of shooting back and forth before you felt a sharp pain in your forearm. You’d been hit, but luckily it hadn’t damaged anything life threatening.

You screamed and In-ho looked down in concern. He saw you cry out in pain, then look up with a determined anger in your eyes. You pointed your gun up towards the Overseer and shot him, hitting his shoulder. He fell forwards, catching himself on the edge and screaming, but he soon continued shooting.

“You’re not leaving. I knew there was something going on with you two. I’ll kill you before you get the chance.”

In-ho yelled between the gunfire. “This place will be burned to the ground before you get the chance.”

The Overseer stopped firing, processing In-ho’s words, knowing the place would be destroyed soon. “Fuck!” He immediately left.

Time was running out. In-ho looked down at you. “Get out of here. I’m going to take care of him. I’ll meet you at the boat.”

“I’m not leaving without you!”

“Y/n, please! I’ll be right behind you. I need to make sure he doesn’t get out.”

“In-ho,” you started sobbing. “I’m not going to leave you.”

“You won’t. I’m going to be right behind you. You’re in no shape to get shot again. Please.”

You could tell he was determined. He would do this no matter what. You stayed silent and still, not wanting to move.

“Y/n. Please. Go, now.”

You didn’t have any more time to argue with him. You let out a shaky sigh and quickly climbed down the ladder as In-ho climbed up. When you arrived at the bottom, you put on the diving gear and made your way out of the underwater cave. The entire time you were overcome with fear, hoping with every fiber of your being that he would be there when you arrived at the boat.

You hit the surface of the water and looked around, locating the beach and the boat. No one was there. Your heart dropped.

You swam to the boat and got rid of the diving equipment. You knew at this point there was most likely less than a minute left before the bombs detonated. Where the fuck is he? You started panicking.

Your thoughts racing, you just couldn’t stay put. You ran through the entrance and looked around, desperate for any sign In-ho was near. Far from where you were, you heard gunshots and yelling. You froze in place, gun drawn.

“In-ho!”

Sirens started blaring, lights flashing. You knew this meant there were only 30 seconds left. Inside your heart was beating out of your chest, your panic overtaking you more each second. You were running as fast as you could, trying to follow the sound of the gunfire.

“Y/n! I’m coming! Get out!”

You sobbed. “In-ho!”

“Go, now!”

You ran towards the entrance and prayed he was right behind you. Just before making it outside, you heard a gunshot and a scream right behind you. You stopped and turned around, screaming for In-ho, but it was too late.

You saw the explosions before hearing them, the force of them launching you outside. The heat from the fire seared your face as you flew backwards. The sound of the explosion assaulted your ear drums, threatening to burst. You grimaced as you were thrown into the air. The force was so strong that once you landed, you immediately lost consciousness.

~~~

Once you came back to consciousness, you slowly opened your eyes and looked up at the sky. Hours had passed and it was nighttime. You were in pain all over from the force of the explosion, the fire on your skin, the bullet in your arm. There was a man next to you, driving the boat. In the darkness, you could barely see who it was, but you assumed it was In-ho.

You lightly groaned. “In-ho…”

The man slowed the boat and looked at you. He touched your face, moving it to face him, but you couldn’t make out his features in your delirious state.

“What did you say?”

You didn’t recognize his voice, which frightened you, but you were too weak to do anything about it. You felt yourself slowly fall back into unconsciousness as you heard the man repeat himself over and over.

“What did you say? Do you know him?”

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[waffleloser]

Call me lame, but I binged Squid Game in a day and first let me say, go watch it! It was really fucking good and l cried a lot during the 4th game. Like a fucking lot. But thats not what I want to talk about.

See, I've been thinking about it and the one thing that kinda stumped me was why did Gi-hun dye his hair red?

It should be said that there are spoilers lol.

After he won the game and went back into his life, spiralling from all that he lost, he finally gets some closure as to why things happened as they did (obviously his arc isn't finished now he's out for revenge but thats besides the point). The first thing he does after Oh Il-nam dies and wins one last game is go get his hair cut. And he choose red.

I was thinking about it and I couldn't remeber any of the characters saying anything important about red. We could look at the red being the blood spilled or maybe the first game that started it all or he just wanted red hair, but to me it felt like there was more to it. Should have been more to it. Well, I got it.

When Gi-hun confronts Oh Il-nam in the apartment building, they end up playing one more game. In the cold, snowy street is a man passed out. The game is if before midnight, someone helps that man, Gi-hun wins, and if someone doesnt, than Oh Il-nam wins. Time is ticking by and people continue to pass by the man in the street, ignoring him as snow begins to bury him. We are reaching the climax as the two men inside argue with each other and midnight is about to strike. Oh Il-nam keeps asking Gi-hun over an over if he still trust people. Can people still be worthy of trust? Gi-hun doesn't answer him.

The scene reaches the climax when a cop car pulls up and finaly helps the man in the street. One of the previous bystanders that had saw him and walked away had come back with help for the man. That bystander had red hair.

Gi-hun wins the game and Oh Il-nam dies.

The next day, Gi-hun walks out of the salon a different man. I think the red hair is meant to reflect that one person who helped the old man in the street. Its a promise to Gi-hun to trust in people and to have people trust him. Maybe thats why he decides to go back to the game to tear it down, to help those around him and save them from the same fate as the people he once knew.

Idk. Maybe it was obvious and I was just being dumb and missing the whole meaning. Still, I like to think the red hair is from that one person and it helped Gi-hun have faith in humanity again. Or not.

[squidgamesmut]

The Guardian Angel | Chapter 10 - Standing on the horizon

Seong Gi-hun X Female Reader

Chapter 10/14 : Standing on the horizon

Minors DNI Contains heavy spoilers The Guardian Angel navigation post

The boots were heavy on your feet and a tad oversized, but it was not comfort you were aiming for right now. You zipped up the suit to your chin and pulled the balaclava over your head.

Your heart drummed in your throat not much unlike the moment when the Squid Game had started, mere days ago, yet it seemed like a lifetime. Straightening your back, you turned to In-ho, who was looking at you with a rather unsure expression. “We can get someone else to fetch your grandfather,” said he, but you shook your head.

“I want to do it.” You had made your decision, and even the Front Man could not change your mind in that. “I want to make sure that all goes according to plan. We’ve got enough suspicious eyes around as is, with that rogue soldier.” You fingered the pink fabric of the jumpsuit. It felt uncomfortably warm, but it might just be the nerves that enhanced that sensation. “The less people know, the better.”

“Do you take full responsibility, (Y/n)?”

“What do you mean?” you quizzed, hoisting the rifle over your shoulder. It was heavy, and you hoped that it wouldn’t give you a painful strain.

“If anything were to happen to you,” said In-ho, “Mr Oh Il-nam would never forgive me for it. I need to ensure your--”

“In-ho.” you cut him off, looking him in the eye. “Between these walls, apart from my grandfather, you know me better than anyone else. Then you also realise how much I need my grandfather to get out of there unscathed, see to his well-being.”

He pressed his lips into a tight line and gave you a nod. “As you wish, ma’am.”

There was that professional edge to his voice again, even though nobody was with you in the room. You sighed and slipped the triangle mask over your face, your eyes adjusting to the limited sight it gave you.

“How do I look?” you said with a small smile, even though he was not able to see it.

A ghost of a grin tugged at his lips. “You look good.”

You wrapped a hand around the rifle, holding it a bit tighter. “Good is not what I was aiming for, In-ho.”

His eyes narrowed and he slightly tilted his head. “Then… What were you aiming for, (Y/n)?”

In-ho stepped closer. An unfamiliar glimmer laid in his eyes, but it disappeared as soon as you clarified yourself. “I was hoping that you’d say I look ‘convincing enough’ to pass as an actual soldier.” Your voice was muffled by the mask.

He sighed and reached forward to adjust the strap of the rifle on your shoulder to make it hang somewhat higher. “There, now you look the part.”

You took a deep breath and walked towards the door. “In that case,” you stated, “It is showtime. I will be back before the VIPs are here, you can trust me on that.”

“Good luck, (Y/n).”

Looking over your shoulder, you saw him stand in the middle of the hall, a bit tense at the shoulders. In his hand he held his mask and played with the strap that sat on the back.

“Thank you.” you responded, leaving him be.

~*~*~

There was desperation in Mi-nyeo’s voice when the timer ran out, and something akin to reproach, aimed at the Players who had actively refused her offer to work together, including Gi-hun.

“You guys,” she cried out, loud enough to drown out the voiceover, “You’re all making a big mistake! Do you really think you can win without me on your team?”

The pairs stood and went to the set of doors that had opened at the end of the room. Beyond it laid the new game field, where they were supposed to go.

“I am Han Mi-nyeo! I’ve made suckers out of everyone there is, from Dongducheon to Gangnam!” Her breath hitched in her throat as she frantically looked around, approaching pairs to beg them to change partners.

Nobody, however, listened to her pleas, no matter how bone-chilling her shrieking was. Part of Gi-hun felt awful for her, but in all fairness, he was glad that he had chosen the old man instead, which had been his duty in a sense.

Leaving her distraught cries behind, Gi-hun went into the room with Player 001, but Mi-nyeo was heard far beyond the doors.

The Players gathered in the middle, but her frenzy was still audible even after the room closed off. It disappeared into the distance as she was dragged away, and Gi-hun looked at the guards with triangle masks in front of him. The playing field looked like some sort of old village covered in twilight, and he felt a pang of nostalgia.

“Attention. All Players, please follow the staff to your designated positions for the game.”

One by one, the pairs were led away by individual armed soldiers, and together with the old man, Gi-hun was also escorted.

They walked through a few of the streets, following the soldier in front of them. “You know,” Player 001 piped up, “When I was a kid, I used to live in a neighbourhood just like this.”

Gi-hun chuckled. “So did I. And you know, our alleyway looked very similar.”

“Really?” said the old man with a large grin on his face.

The guard halted in their tracks and turned to them.

“Players, please take one bag each from the staff member before you.” the voiceover instructed, and the soldier held out two small bags towards him and the old man.

Something clinked inside when Gi-hun took it. “There should be a set of ten marbles in each bag. Please check to confirm the number.”

He took them in his palm and counted them quickly. “It’s marbles,” said he, “Old man, we’re going to be playing with this. Are you familiar with it?”

Player 001 hummed and began to smile widely. “Ah, yes, very familiar. Used to have a lot as a kid. Oh, yes, back in the day!” The man beamed with joy and looked at Gi-hun. “And you know, I was pretty good.”

“Not too bad myself!” Gi-hun responded, laughing. “Ah, that is good news! I’m glad it’s not just about our strength.”

The old man began to excitedly move back and forth a little, barely able to contain his joy. “That means you and I are…” he paused, “Gganbu now! Pretty great!”

“Gganbu, huh?” Gi-hun quizzed.

“I thought you said you played this before. Gganbu, come on, you know! It’s a good friend! One who you trust a lot. You share things with them, you see?”

Gi-hun gasped in realisation. “Ah!” he said with a beaming grin.

“Your marbles, everything!” the old man finished his explanation.

Gi-hun pointed at the side of his head, “A gganbu! I remember now! I had one in my town, too. Used to do everything with him!”

Player 001 snickered. “Okay, we are gganbu!” He held out his hand, his little finger outstretched for Gi-hun. “Should we make this official?”

Laughing, Gi-hun accepted the offer of the small but meaningful pact. “Yeah buddy, like this!” He hooked his little finger around the old man’s, and they pressed their thumbs together.

“You and me, sir,” Gi-hun chimed, quickly correcting himself: “Oh, gganbu! We will go around this whole town and take all the marbles.”

They grinned at each other for a second before Gi-hun turned to the guard, awaiting their signal to start playing.

However, the woman on the PA had not yet finished the explanation of the rules.

“In this game, using your set of ten marbles, you will play the game of your choice with your partner. The Player who manages to take all ten marbles from their partner wins.”

A wave of sadness overcame Gi-hun as he attempted to grasp what had just been announced, looking at the old man, who was looking at his marbles with a radiant smile.

One of them would not come out of here alive.

“How pretty!’ the old man mused, holding one of his marbles against the light of the artificial sun, exhaling in awe of the glass sphere.

Gi-hun sighed. “Sir, excuse me.”

“You will have thirty minutes for this game. Let the game begin.”

The old man began wandering off right when the timer began to count down. “Uh, sir, come back!” Gi-hun called after him, breathing heavily whilst beginning to pursue said Player.

You followed them suit, keeping up with them, swallowing the lump of tears that had begun to form in your throat. It had been years since you had seen your grandfather glow like that and were taken aback by how genuine his expression had been, as well as how close he had grown to Seong Gi-hun.

It was almost unfair to make Player 456 believe that the old man would be dead at the end of this game, but then, you knew that it had been coming from the very start. The plan of safely extracting your grandfather from the Squid Game without raising suspicion had been watertight.

If your grandfather had the losing hand, you would pretend to execute him and hand in a coffin weighed down with bags of leftover sugar, which were already laying at the exit, placed there beforehand.

If he happened to get the winning hand, he’d pretend to get lost in a spell of dementia in the hopes that the other Player would take advantage of his vulnerable state. Gi-hun in this case. Even though you did not want him to break the promise that had been sealed by their little fingers, you knew how strong one’s survival instinct would be when it truly came to it, and that Seong Gi-hun would fight for his life.

Had your grandfather not been chosen, he would have been removed from the waiting room, not returning to the playing grounds anymore, thus unsuspectingly making the Players believe that he had been eliminated.

But he was not alone, and he had to make it seem believable that his illness was acting up, wandering off in complete awe of the streets around him.

“We must be close.” your grandfather mumbled whilst you walked three paces behind Gi-hun, “Yes, it was somewhere around here, huh.”

Gi-hun stepped in front of him, desperation upon his features. “Come on, let’s play. Sir, we need to! Come, let’s play this right now.” He held the bag of marbles in the face of the old man.

“This is so strange!” said Player 001, “It should be here. This is the alley!”

Gi-hun turned to you unexpectedly, and you felt your face heat up. His eyes were pleading, but whatever could you do?

“Where… My house, where did it go?” your grandfather questioned.

“Sir, come back!” Gi-hun panicked, going after him. You had no other choice but to go with them, your heart heavy with Gi-huns impending grief. It would be irreversible, and you stood witness to it all.

“Sir, we have to play now! We’ve got to start right now!”

“Play what?”

“With our marbles!” said Gi-hun, “Let’s go!”

Your grandfather stared at him. “Why should I?”

Gi-hun scoffed and pointed around the room, “Look around you! Everybody else is playing, too!” He put his hands on the old man’s shoulders and looked him in the eye. “We have to do this!”

Il-nam roughly shoved off his hands. “No! That game is for little children!” With a grunt, he continued his stalking through the playing grounds, in search of his house.

He played the part well, you thought to yourself. It would have been enough to even convince you if you hadn’t known better, and the idea itself made your shoulders heavy with how realistic it seemed. The problem was that it could be more than just acting.

Gi-hun turned to you in dread, and begged you to listen. “Sir, he’s not in his right mind, sir!” You could not reveal your voice, nor your identity, but the anxiety in his eyes made your heart clench in your chest. “I think he’s got dementia! Does that mean that he’s out, or… He’s not gonna play! So that means he is forfeited, right?”

You had to bite your tongue to keep silent, for you wanted to take away his anguish and take your grandfather back to safety, to tell Gi-hun that he would live to see another day, but if you would speak now, everything would have been for nothing. Gi-hun would have to be executed for the advantage you’d be giving him.

And so you stood your ground. No amount of imploring could sway you now, no matter how badly you wanted to relieve him of his agony.

Your grandfather stood at a metal gate, attempting to open it to peer through the gap, and Gi-hun cursed under his breath before going to him, once again begging him to play. “Just one little game, okay?” Gi-hun said with a feigned smile, “Here, it will be… It will be so much fun, sir!”

“No, I’d better go home now,” said your grandfather. “I know my house is nearby. It’s somewhere down this alley.” He peeked inside, and Gi-hun grunted in desperation. In a wave of panic, he grabbed Player 001 and placed him roughly with his back against the wall. “Will you just pull yourself together, old man?!”

You had to withhold yourself from intervening, and had to witness with mixed feelings how Gi-hun implored your grandfather to play. “They will kill us both if we don’t get started soon!” His bottom lip trembled, and your grandfather leaned away from him. “You got that thing in your head, so I bet you don’t care what happens here, but I won’t just sit here and die, okay?!”

He grabbed your grandfather by the upper arms and shouted in his face, “Listen, I can’t die! I need to get out of here!”

Oh Il-nam whimpered and turned to respond. “Don’t yell at me.” he stated, “All right, I will play, but don’t yell.”

Gi-hun sighed in relief, yet sobbed with unshed adrenaline. Trembling, he released your grandfather and went with him to a more secluded area. Sitting down on the threshold of one of the fake doors, they began to play under your watchful eye.

They decided upon the game where one Player had to guess if the number of marbles in the other’s hand was even or odd.

You observed how their game unfolded, your grandfather’s hands thinner than they had been before. They trembled with the lack of medication he had received over the past days, and it hurt to see. You blinked rapidly to prevent your tears from falling, and saw how Gi-hun lost five of his marbles to your grandfather, who successfully guessed the amount in Gi-hun’s hand to be even.

Shifting the rifle on your shoulder, you made yourself a bit more comfortable. The countdown was already halfway through, and so you grew more anxious with the minute, no matter that you knew the outcome of the game. Regardless of how it would go, Gi-hun would be considered victorious, even if it happened to be the other way around at the very last minute. Fifteen minutes, and you would be able to ensure your grandfather’s safety at last.

The final ten minutes were counting down, and your grandfather narrowed his eyes at Gi-hun’s closed fist. “It might be odd…” he muttered, “On the other hand, it could be even.” He paused. “That must be it.”

“Come on, hurry up and go.” Gi-hun’s patience had certainly left him.

“Odd.”

You saw how life drained from Gi-hun’s eyes, and he opened his palm with a sigh of despair. Your grandfather laughed. “Look at that! I won again!”

“How many are in yours?” Gi-hun whimpered. Your grandfather revealed four.

“Ah, shit…” Gi-hun sighed, breathing heavily. You had noticed that your grandfather did not have a full set of marbles yet, but still stepped in Gi-hun’s direction, rifle in hand.

“I still have one!” Gi-hun breathed in a frightened fashion, even though you had made no implication that you were going to shoot him. He showed you the marble, and you remained in your position. “I still have one more.”

The first gunshot rang through the air and pulled Gi-hun out of the next round. He shakily exhaled and peered at your grandfather’s closed fist, trying his best to guess correctly, even though the game was purely about odds.

“Even.” said Gi-hun. Your grandfather moved his hand to open it, but Gi-hun grabbed it tightly. “No, hold on. That’s not what… Wait a minute… Just give me a second.”

There was no tactic to his change of decision, but he did it nevertheless. “Odd.” He nodded and repeated: “Odd.”

Il-nam opened his fingers.

It revealed an even number of marbles, and Gi-hun trembled with fear at the realisation. He blinked slowly, attempting to comprehend his loss. Of course, it was of no use.

“Which one did you just say?” your grandfather questioned.

Gi-hun looked up at the old man, frowning. “What?”

“Can you repeat what you said just now?”

“Even.” Gi-hun lied. “I said, even.”

Your grandfather looked at his marbles whilst your stomach churned, knowing that you probably would have done the same had it come to a matter of life and death.

“Oh…” muttered your grandfather, “I lost this one.”

He handed a marble to Gi-hun, and they continued the game. Guilt tugged at Gi-hun’s heart, but he had no other choice if he wanted to live. For a moment, you crossed his mind.

Was he really going to take your grandfather away from you? Would he cheat his way out of this game and leave you without a chance of any hopeful future, should your grandfather win?

He thought back on the conversation he had with you a few days prior. He imagined you pacing around your apartment, concerned about the man you cared for so much.

Still, Gi-hun lied his way through the game, unaware of your proximity to it all. With every marble that weighed down onto his hand, his conscience became a little heavier.

If you knew, he wondered, would you forgive him?

The old man once again forgot what he said, and Gi-hun once again deceived him.

Gunshots rang through the air, and you watched with a tight throat how Gi-hun was misleading your grandfather right in front of your very own eyes.

And still, you felt something warm in your gut every time you laid eyes on Gi-hun.

Under gunfire in the distance, your grandfather put an odd number of marbles on his open palm, not even hiding it from Gi-hun’s view. Player 456 squinted with guilt and early onset grief about his betrayal.

“Odd,” he muttered.

“Hold on,” whispered the old man suddenly, “What is today’s date?”

Gi-hun frowned.

“My son has his birthday soon. What day is it? The 24th? I was going to buy him a toy robot for his birthday. This year, I need to get him a gift. I completely forgot last year.” Player 001 smiled, “I better do that soon. I can’t forget again.”

Gi-hun’s chin shivered, and he was close to crying. The old man snapped out of his thoughts, realising they were playing something. “Ah, my hand. What was your guess again?”

“Odd.” Gi-hun breathed with a heavy voice.

Three marbles lay in his palm, and Gi-hun opened his hand with trembling fingers to reveal the exact amount of marbles your grandfather had.

Your grandfather shook his small bag, but nothing fell out. “I’m out of marbles.” he sighed with a grunt of annoyance. “What should I do, huh? I’d love to keep playing. Hey, would you let me borrow one from you? Just for a while.”

Your grandfather smiled, but Gi-hun could not even look at him. Crying, Gi-hun rose from his seat, whispering his last words to the old man in an apology. “Sir, I’m so sorry.”

He approached you slowly, but your grandfather reached for his pocket. “Oh. Look at that! Forgot I had another one here.” He beamed with joy, and Gi-hun turned slowly. “Not out yet!” Il-nam said with a chuckle. “One more to go.”

Gi-hun’s face contorted, and he went to count his marbles on the ground, coming up to nineteen. Your duty to keep silent had you witness your grandfather wander off once again without you being able to say anything about it. It was not without reason that he did so, and you knew that he would not let Gi-hun die like that.

You stared at the numbers 001 on Gi-hun’s back as you followed them, your heartstrings tightening in pain. It was a bittersweet sight, and you wished that there had been more time to see him and your grandfather interact, to see them bond and thrive, but instead, their friendship was crumbling to what remained of it in this very minute.

“Sir, please, let’s just play one more time, huh?” He tried to convince your grandfather. “Come on, one more round.”

“Oh.” your grandfather said in awe upon looking at one of the artificial homes, “It's this one!” Breathing in delight, he approached the door, “Yes, this is the one! My wife and I had this one here! I raised my son right here!” He reached for the doors and pushed them open, reminiscing on the life he had fabricated for himself.

“Yes! I even had a nice little pond, right here in the front yard.”

“Sir, please, you have one marble left!” Gi-hun implored, putting a hand on his shoulder as he followed him inside and roughly spun him around. “We are running out of time sir!”

“And I,” your grandfather continued, undisturbed, “I would come home from work, and see my son, his friends were always here and they would all play, and they wouldn’t even know I was here!”

Gi-hun grabbed onto your grandfather, shaking him back and forth. “You need to get it together!” he exclaimed into his face, “Get it together and play with me again right now, understood?”

Il-nam was unfazed. “I would hide and I’d go just behind the utility pole there and take a peek at all of them playing and just watching. They would always have so much fun.”

The vivid description almost overwhelmed you, for you knew he had your uncle in mind.

“Sir, please! Try to snap out of it, sir!” Gi-hun sobbed. “Sir, I’m begging you.”

Tears leaked down his cheeks and he pressed his head against his chest.

“Why don’t we do one more round and bet it all?” suggested your grandfather.

Gi-hun’s face snapped up. “What?”

“Everything that I still got,” Il-nam clarified, “Against everything that you’ve got.”

Gi-hun released him and shook his head. “You can’t possibly mean that.” he whispered.

“You’re gonna take yours and bet it all, and I’ll do the same with everything that I still got here. Okay? That keeps everything fair.”

You swallowed thickly, knowing what he was aiming at. He was shrewd beyond all.

“I’ll wager all I got just to get your one?” Gi-hun breathed in disbelief, and your grandfather nodded in acknowledgement. “What kind of nonsense is this?!” He exclaimed, genuinely in shock. “There is no sense at all!”

“So then…” stated your grandfather, “That’s what you did this whole time. Does tricking your gganbu like that make sense to you?” Gi-hun’s offence was quickly replaced with deep shame.

He exhaled, tears close to shedding, and he bowed his head in remorse. He could not bear to look Il-nam in the eye, not after what he had done.

Peeking around the corner, you had watched it unfold, and saw how your grandfather took Gi-hun’s hand in his. “Take it.” said Player 001, putting the cold marble against Gi-hun’s hand. “It’s yours anyway.”

Gi-hun’s face trembled, tears now freely flowing down his cheeks. Behind your mask, you couldn’t fight your own sorrow anymore. They gathered in the bottom at your chin, and you let out a hot, shaky breath against the inside of the face covering.

“We are… Gganbu, aren’t we? Don’t you remember? When you and I swore that we were gganbu buddies. Gganbu always share everything with each other no matter what.”

Gi-hun began to cry harder, unable to speak, and Il-nam closed his hand around the marble. “Thank you,” said he, “You made all this... A good experience. What a great way to go.”

You let out a shivering exhale at your grandfather’s joyful expression, a beaming smile breaking out on his face. Your legs felt weak, and you felt like fainting, almost, overcome with sadness.

“What a great way to go,” he promised, “Really.”

Gi-hun squeezed his eyes shut and began to silently wail, allowing your grandfather to pull him into a tight embrace. “It’s okay. Everything is okay.”

Gi-hun whimpered, howling in your grandfather’s arms. You just stood there, unbothered on the outside, but your heart broke in your chest. You did not want to force them asunder, but you had no choice.

They held each other firmly, and Gi-hun felt nauseous at the thought of you, and the way he had deceived your grandfather. And most of all, the way the old man so easily forgave him. He wondered if you would do the same if he so happened to survive these lethal games.

The timer beeped, and gunshots rang through the air. Gi-hun released your grandfather and stepped away slowly, turning around to leave the premises, wanting nothing else but to howl into his pillow until he would fall into a dreamless sleep.

“Hey, I remember my name now.” Gi-hun could barely hear him over how loudly his heart beat in his own ears, but halted in his tracks. He did not have the power to turn to the old man, who in his final moments recalled his name.

“My name is Il-nam. Oh Il-nam.”

You walked past Gi-hun into the small secluded space, and Gi-hun walked off, vision blurred with tears, and guilt screwed his throat shut.

Grabbing your handgun instead of your rifle, you waited a few seconds, aiming it at your grandfather’s head. Then, you moved the barrel down, a bullet embedding itself into the ground in between you.

“Player 001, eliminated.” sounded through the room.

Il-nam looked at you, and you reached for your mask, taking it off.

Your cheeks were damp with tears, and your grandfather wryly smiled at you.

“My dear,” he whispered, opening his arms.

You sniffled, accepting his embrace.

[deonideatta]

hi hi i heard you like chief kim and i'm here to get all the intel on why it's a good drama 😊 and what you love about park jae bum's other dramas 😊 pls let me know if there's romance bc that's the oxygen i breathe when i watch a show 💕

Hello!!! Thank you for asking me about Chief Kim!!!! I can go on about it for ages lol. This got a bit long so i’m putting it under a cut

Chief Kim (aka Good Manager) is a comedy office drama with 20 eps, and it aired in 2017. There isn’t a main romance plotline, but don’t let that put you off! It’s an incredible drama in so many ways. (tho there is a subtle romance side plot, but it doesn’t involve the main character and it’s never the main focus, though it is cute). It does feature a bromance that was so great that the two actors literally won an award for it tho lol, so there’s also that!

In a way, the general premise is somewhat similar to Vincenzo in that it’s the main character and an unlikely team of others fighting a big corporation. The comedic tone is also more or less the same. The drama follows Kim Seong Ryong (the titular Chief Kim, played by Namgoong Min), a man with a talent for handling numbers who goes from running a seedy accounting firm to quite accidentally becoming a champion of employees rights in one of the biggest corporations in the country. He originally joins the company with the goal of embezzling a lot money and moving abroad, but he gets swept up in office politics surrounding high executives and the sinister goings on surrounding the position he was recruited for, as well as the shady things the higher-ups want him to do and the suspicion of the other members of his department. Eventually he starts to work alongside them to fight the corruption of the higher ups, and quickly becomes the bane of top management’s existence by being so incredibly annoying that they begin to regret hiring him.

It’s the kind of drama that really gets you to laugh, while still being incredibly heartwarming. The main character is so unashamedly funny, and the character dynamics are all so warm, and none of it ever seems forced. The first tag for the drama on MyDramaList is “character development”, and that says a lot! There’s so much growth that goes on for all the characters, even some of the villains! It’s especially funny because to begin with all the good things Kim Seong Ryeong does are completely by accident, and he’s annoyed but also pleased with all the attention it gets him. Over time he begins to own it, and begins to actively try to stand up to the corrupt people at the top of the company. The other highlight for me besides the humor is definitely the characters. From the eccentric main character, to the no-nonsense second in command in his department Yoon Ha Kyung, to the aggressive finance director Seo Yul who is always eating (one of my all time favourite characters, played by 2PM’s Junho), to the janitor lady who always roasts everyone, there isn’t a single dull character, whether good or bad. And Seo Yul gets one of the best character arcs I’ve ever seen in a kdrama. You get to watch the characters struggle and triumph, and you feel for them because their struggles feel so real, and the drama really gets you invested in them. You see the ways in which they fight to survive as normal working class citizens and you want them to win.

It differs from Vincenzo in that the main character isn’t considered evil and loses his less savoury traits over the course of the drama (his character arc is one of becoming a more upstanding citizen), and the message is one of fighting against corporate greed using the corporate system against itself in order to make things better for the average working citizen. But there’s the same plotting, and the same feeling of rooting for the protagonist team to win as you watch them plot and plan. I never rewatch things, but i’ve rewatched Chief Kim twice already and i’m looking forward to rewatching it again soon (just writing about it is making me want to rewatch it right now lol). It especially hits well for me because i love office dramas, and the humor and the bromance are just right. (Also, not entirely related, but it’s the first drama Kim Seonho was in!)

Another Park Jaebum drama i can definitely recommend is The Fiery Priest! It’s also a comedy action drama with 20 eps (released in 2019), and it follows Kim Hae Il (Kim Nam Gil), a catholic priest with a real temper, as he works to solve the mystery surrounding the death of a senior priest. No romance there either, but it’s got the same humor as Chief Kim and Vincenzo, and the same overarching found family trope (that really shines for this one). It’s darker than Chief Kim, but not as dark as Vincenzo. The plot is very intriguing, and it’s the kind of drama you feel compelled to keep watching to see what happens next. And the host of characters in that drama is still one of my favourites to this day. Every character was incredibly written, and they all played vital roles in the overall story. Again, lots of character development all round, and great character arcs not just for the main character (even for a few of the villains!). Plus it was lovely to watch the various characters interact, get closer, and build relationships. Such an iconic squad. Not to mention how funny it is?? And the fight scenes??? In fact, I enjoyed it so much that when I checked Park Jaebum’s page on MyDramaList after watching it around June last year and saw Vincenzo as an upcoming project, I added it to my plan to watch list immediately even though there was only a single line of synopsis lol. It’s also got an absolute banger of a soundtrack!

When you think about it, all three (Chief Kim, TFP and Vincenzo) can be simplified to “guy with dubious past sets out to fight corruption and creates a great support circle in the process”. All three are dramas of finding people who care about you and are willing to fight alongside you, and fighting for your convictions/what you think is right. Each main character starts out as a somewhat solitary figure, and you get to watch as they each find people who are willing to fight alongside them and support them. What exactly those specific convictions are varies in each drama, but Park Jaebum writes the character development arcs incredibly each time, and the relationships between the characters are so real and so satisfying to watch. And yet the integrity of the main character in each drama is never compromised either, it’s shown that they can grow and become better without losing themselves. The growth is also in the way that they learn to work with and rely on others, because teamwork makes the dream work. And then to cap it all off he lets them have victories, and he makes it SO satisfying??? There are highs and there are lows, and you feel all of those right there with the characters, which makes the victories feel so so good. In each we see the ensemble cast get involved with the fight and the plotting, and we get to see all their epic plans and their execution, and the victories they win that build up over time. And it’s so satisfying to me! I love it a lot, just thinking about it is making me smile lol. It also shows how well humor and darker/more serious plotlines/events are balanced in the dramas, neither is compromised in favour of the other, but it always works so well that the humor never feels forced or out of place. As someone who doesn’t like overbearingly dark shows, I really appreciate that. They all give you lots to laugh at, while not losing any of the plot to the funny.

Of course there are differences, notably the romance, and the fact that Vincenzo is bad vs bad rather than good vs bad like the other two. They deal more with redemption (especially The Fiery Priest), but that works for the stories that are being told, and it’s very well executed.

It’s worth noting that Park Jaebum also wrote Good Doctor and 4 seasons of God’s Quiz. I haven’t checked those out yet, but I’ve heard good things about all of them. He also wrote Blood, I haven’t seen that one either but opinions seem to be split on how good it was. All of those are medical dramas (which is the reason I haven’t watched them lol, i can’t stand medical dramas) from before 2017, when he wrote Chief Kim. It seems he’s been on a roll since then, good for him and good for us lol. You can see everything he’s written on his MyDramaList page.

Overall I enjoyed the Park Jaebum dramas I have seen for first and foremost the comedy, but also for the warmth of the character relationships and for how well developed/written each character is. And I love how he balances the humor with more poignant/darker moments, I laughed a lot watching all three dramas, but I’ve cried over each of them as well. It’s a good balance to have, it gives you a good plot to be interested in, but doesn’t keep you stressed and sombre the whole way through. I’ve seen people say that Vincenzo wouldn’t be as good if it wasn’t so wacky, and I fully agree. It’s the same for both TFP and Chief Kim, and that balance is definitely what I appreciate most in Park Jaebum’s dramas. I know I will laugh, but I also know I will get an incredible plot and incredible characters, and that’s really important for me. Plus I know I can trust that there will be a good ending because the writer cares about his characters.

I definitely recommend checking out both TFP and Chief Kim after Vincenzo is done, especially since they’re so similar in terms of comedic tone and basic plot direction. If you ever get to watching either of them feel free to hmu to chat about it!! There’s lots of plot stuff that can be can discussed.

lol this got v long (i have lots to say about how much i love these dramas haha), but I hope it’s helpful!!!

[what-breaks-my-heart]

Here are some brief thoughts on kdrama that started airing in 2020 that I've watched. I said brief, but those who have been following me would appreciate that this is indeed, brief.

The list is in alphabetical order.

1. 365: Repeat the Year (MBC)

Disclosure: I am a HUGE Lee Joon Hyuk stan. He is second only to Hyun Bin on my list. The fact that this drama is on the top of this list is a happy coincidence 🥰🥰

I was soooooooo excited when I knew Lee Joon Hyuk was to star in a new drama. MBC made the announcement of the drama late last year, and I was literally walking to the office when I saw the announcement on ig.

The premise of the drama was pretty straightforward. 10 people were given the chance to travel back in time exactly one year prior. Mysterious things kept happening to the people who took the trip, so our Detective Ji “Fluffy-Hair” Hyung Joo and webtoon writer Shin “Self-Hater” Ga Hyun joined hands to figure out what exactly happened.

Once they finally figured out what caused the mysterious cases, they faced a great dilemma on what to do, with our Fluffy Hair detective running as a fugitive.

The ending was really sad, and I really wished it ended differently, but the main character of the story was our Fluffy Hair detective, and him having to live on and reset the whole thing from the new past was a nice touch to the ending.

This drama was full of surprises, twist and turn, and it is certainly a drama I would consider rewatching in the future.

2. Do You Like Brahms? (SBS)

Many people criticised the second half of this drama. Apparently the year 2020 is the year when kdramaland keeps being a disappointment, and many people are quick to include this drama in the list of disappointing drama, despite having a good beginning.

I beg to differ though. To me this drama feels more of a healing drama, wherein the characters are forced to deal with their issues. And anyone who has had to go through any form of therapy knows how hard healing process is.

TL;DR: The main leads are both people who have been mentally abused by the people around them, except for Cha Young In, because she was the only reason I did not throw my remote control at my 50-inch TV.

Park Joon Young is your classic example of a ‘gifted kid’ struggle. He was seen as a young, talented pianist who had a bright future ahead of him. But people started to treat him more like a trophy than a human being, so he decided to take a sabbatical, much to the criticism of people in the music industry. Park Joon Young realised that his passion in playing the piano has faded away, no thanks to his abusive piano professor who belittled him again and again, and practically brainwashed him into being a people pleaser. You could see how Park Joon Young was not himself in the beginning of the drama once you finish the drama.

Chae Song Ah took interest in violin at a later age (much later than professional musicians) and decided to pursue her dream by enrolling into a music programme. Her classmates were all younger than her, and it didn’t help that they all learnt music since much younger. I love how Song Ah did not give up on her dream easily and gave it her all, before she finally decided to let go of her dream to become a musician. The metaphor of her love for violin and Joon Young hurting her again and again and she just endured it though.. I cried like a mess well I am a mess but that’s a separate issue

Special shout out to Cha Young In who was there for both of them.

3. Flower of Evil (tvN)

If thriller is your thing, consider this drama. If you are one of those people who like to see your characters being tortured (physically and mentally), this drama is a MUST WATCH. And if you enjoy watching Lee Joon Ki playing a character who is put at a great distress because he is trying to run from his past, go watch this drama.

More importantly, if you enjoy a drama where your ML is sexy, attends to house chores and takes care of his bright young daughter while his wife goes crazy for solving violent crimes, a devoted husband who is attentive and a tender person but also a freak in the sheets, you are wasting every single of your breath not watching this drama.

I mean look at this man teasing his wife about his stamina.

Flower of Evil did not feel draggy at all. Everything that happened within the first 6 episodes could have been an entire drama if this was written by someone else. Seriously, this drama kept me at the edge of my couch!

The dynamic of HS and JW screams POWER COUPLE but at the same time it broke my heart how they were pushed into corners too many times by the people around them I do hope they had some sexy times while they were in the corners though

The focus on their wedding rings throughout the drama symbolised their unbreakable bond. The wedding rings were literally the very last thing that kept them together when JW stumbled upon evidences that pointed against HS.

JW, whose compass was only trusting what she saw, and not what she heard, tried to break the stigma of women being at a disadvantage in the police force. Heck, she was better than her entire team when it came to solving cases, her being the only woman in the team. Who said women cannot make good cops?

The plot twist though.. And the climax.. To this day, I still listen to this soundtrack from the drama and cry just thinking of the climax.

4. Into the Ring (also known as Memorials) (KBS2)

I didn’t even plan on watching this drama. I was channel surfing and saw Park Sung Hoon looking all depressed in the first episode and ran into Koo Se Ra. Girl was UNHINGED and determined to fight for her way.

Her motivation was initially on getting a stable pay check from being a district representative (it was only 60 million won which is like USD55k so it’s not that much) but she eventually became the district representative who fought for the benefit of the people and did not care for the political warfare that took place.

Came along Seo Gong Myung, a government officer in the local government office who was demoted from planning unit of the accounting department or something to be a secretariat to the district assembly. Seo Gong Myung sticks to his principle no matter what, which surprise surprise, is HATED by everyone in the district government.

Turns out our main leads were friends when they were kids so Se Ra kept teasing him and dragging him into her scheme of fighting for the people, which Gong Myung agreed to, not so much because he was a community-loving person, but because he was afraid Se Ra would get into trouble since she was as straight as a ruler.

Long story short, our leads fell for each other, and their relationship was HILAIROUS to watch. I think I speak for everyone who watched the drama that we had no reason to believe Se Ra did not peg Gong Myung for fun 😝😝

They were so cute together awwww

5. Kairos (MBC)

This is another drama that I stumbled into. Only this time, I saw Nam Gyu Ri and I remember seeing her ig post on a new drama so I decided to give it a go. She wrecked my heart in 49 Days so I decided to check this out for funsies. Hooo boy was I in for a major surprise.

The first two episodes got me hooketh!! I still cannot believe how the drama managed to keep me on my edge especially during the last 5 minutes of every episode. The pacing is even faster than Flower of Evil, and since this drama went back and forth between past and future, it keeps me guessing whether their efforts would bear fruit.

Will Kim “Sexy Brain” Seo Jin  and Han “I-Know-No-Fear” Ae Ri succeed in fighting the evil, who at this point in time remains unknown? I know Chairman Yoo Seo Il is currently being hinted as the culprit behind everything but I know better that he is just a puppet who sold his soul to the real devil who most likely is in the higher ranks in politics. I mean he even hinted at his remorse for what happened with Taejung Town 19 years prior. My suspicion is he is trying to cover up whatever happened because otherwise his own family would be at risk, so his only option is to redeem himself by doing something about the Taejung Town. I could be wrong, but regardless of who turns out to be the real villain in the story, I can say I am so satisfied by how the story has progressed so far.

The time paradox still hurts my brain, but I am choosing that this drama does not assume that time is linear.

There is still not enough people watching this drama and I’m begging you all to go and catch up before it ends in two weeks time.

6. More than Friends (JTBC)

A little trivia: I reblog most of the posts from @kdramastuff even if I am not watching the show at the point of reblogging the posts. I had been following her posts on this drama for 3 weeks, and I finally decided to marathon all 6 episodes and joined the watching party.

More than Friends was another drama that many people called a disappointment but I had a different opinion on it. Yes, I used to be the nerd who had different opinions on many things in high school sue me

The drama is premised on Kyung Woo Yeon who is said to have a crush on her high school friend, Lee Soo for 10 years. Lee Soo is nowhere near to be the perfect boyfriend material. He is selfish, does not care about other people’s feelings, and was always a lone ranger.

BUUUUUUT, Lee Soo seemed to show signs of care and affection (even though it was not at all for a normal person’s standard) for Woo Yeon. Surprisingly, he seemed to only do it for Woo Yeon and gave attention to Woo Yeon alone, even though he could practically pick and choose anyone he liked from the swarm of girls who were chasing him.

One day, he told Woo Yeon that he had to leave to the US to study, which made our girl sad. She decided to confess at the airport, but he outright turned her down, saying he only wanted to be friends with her. Over the time, they kept running into each other by coincidence (note: her name Woo Yeon is a wordplay on coincidence in Korean). Later, it was revealed that he wanted her to always be by his side, but he has built a wall as tall as the Great Wall of China before the idea of love so he didn’t realise what his true feeling for Woo Yeon was all along.

Woo Yeon, who felt sick of the ten-year crush, decided to end the “curse” and kissed him by the beach, thinking of getting a closure on her crush.

Long story short, Lee Soo finally realised his feeling for her and decided to confess, but by that time, a young, handsome, rich CEO of a conglomerate has entered into the picture. Cue the game of cat and mouse between Lee Soo and Woo Yeon about resentment, regret and relationship.

This drama was promoted as a romcom, but it feels more like a slice-of-life drama with a mix of melo and romcom in there. Seriously, I cried buckets watching this drama, not something you’d expect from a romcom. The dialogues were well-written, with each episode revolving around a specific theme. This was such a good drama coming from a rookie writer.

This drama did not have that many viewers to begin with, and many of those few people dropped it along the way, including the one who was responsible in getting me hooked into this drama :p  By the end of it, there were so few people talking about this drama in the tag (shout out to @dohyunsoo @have-yet-to-decide @starfire-s @thbn-anything​ for keeping me company to the very end of this drama)

This drama broke my record of screenshots per episode and total screenshots for any show. Until now, I have yet to finish posting them. I should probably upload more screenshots later tonight.

This drama had some AMAZING shots in the first half, with beautiful sceneries mostly in Seoul. It’s like what they said, “a daily occurrence for you, a trip for me”.

7. Oh My Baby (tvN)

I did not even remember watching this drama!! It was only after scrolling through my gallery that I saw I had shared some posts on my ig story about the drama.

It was in the middle of a lockdown when this drama aired and many of my memories from back then feel so distant to me.

The plot was not THAT good, but this drama is something you may consider if you like torturing yourself about the struggle of wanting to have a baby.

8. Once Again (KBS2)

Arguably one of the weekend family drama KBS2 in a while that kept me waiting for new episodes in front of my TV. Some people are turned off by weekend family drama because they tend to have slow pacing which makes viewers feel like they are being dragged to one of those boring corporate events that you would rather miss and wish you could be literally anywhere else.

Because this drama had more pairing than the typical weekend family drama, the story did take some time before it was on full momentum. It did feel like the drama could have been better with even one less sibling to worry about, but it was a fun watch in the middle of lockdown.

Will I watch it again? I’d rather rewatch House of Bluebird (starring Lee Joon Hyuk and Lee Sang Yeob as friends to enemies to friends again) because that drama spoke to me in a way that was more relatable. No hate to Once Again though. I just prefer House of Bluebird better.

Note: Justice for Song Ga Hee and her lovely son, Kim Ji Hoon. He had to grow up so much because of what happened to his mother, that it broke Ga Hee’s heart. And mine of course

9. Secret Forest 2 (tvN)

I watched Secret Forest once it has finished and I fell in love with the drama! Imagine my excitement when they announced Secret Forest 2 with my three main characters reprising their roles. No hate to Yoon Se Ah, I love her, but her screen time in Secret Forest was not enough to make me excited about her return. But I was pleased with her role in Secret Forest 2 and I hope if there is a third season, her character gets the redemption arc that she yearns for.

Secret Forest 2 was not as intense as the brilliant original, but I understood that it had to do with the overall theme of the season, and the theme required the script to be as such. Some people may argue me on this, but I still think what they pulled off was brilliant.

Too bad there was a severe lack of Lee Joon Hyuk on my screen though.

10. Tale of the Nine-Tailed (tvN)

Well. This drama went far beyond my expectation. The OTP was to die for. No such thing as miscommunication trope. This drama did not waste time on unnecessary drama. The pacing was incredibly fast, even faster than Kairos. Although to be fair, Kairos had to play with two different timelines and required time to establish the setting.

I’m sad about what happened to Lee Rang, but he did what he did, and he would never be able to erase that much pain from his memory even if the deities decided to be lenient on him because of his roles in killing off Imoogi. A fresh start as a human seemed like a fair reset to his life, and I hope he lives well, surrounded by people who love him.

I was never a fan of Jo Bo Ah (no hate on her, I was just indifferent) but this drama opened my eyes to what an incredible actress she is. I wish her a successful career ahead.

[ask-them-bois]

Hurt Him Some More (Final)

The night was young; the sky was still grey on the west horizon. Above, stars burst to life through the inky blackness as a million eyes that watched from the shadows. Nebulae and galaxies spread their impossible forms through the gaps, as the two moons bled their light across the glassy water.

It was cold, the salty air biting like the fangs of war dogs. Not a sound was to be heard; even the wind’s voice was hushed. The sharp brine and bitter scent of gunpowder drifted with the breeze. Even the water below barely burbled.

The world was holding its breath, no more than an ancient vase balanced on a precipice of primitive ruins, waiting for its slumber to be disturbed.

With the taste of his own blood on his tongue, Ruthless stood upon his Warshark’s deck. He watched as, silhouetted against the moon, the Dragon Star approached. He had very little time left. From the distance, it was no more than the size of his thumb, but Alastr would be upon him shortly.

It’s just like that night, he thought, raising his head to feel the wind brush past his hair and fins. Just like the night I lost her; it was this beautiful then, too. He opened his eyes and gazed up at the faint lights in the sky. There was a nebula above him that was her color. Are ye watching me, my love? Lend me yer strength.

Casting his gaze around his ship, he nodded once. He reached out, his claws gently running over the grains in the mast. His ship had outlasted him; she was still waiting when he had returned, hidden where he’d left her. She was old and tired; her wood was warped and her belly leaking, her sails tattered and ropes frayed. Just like him.

“O√e last fight, lass. Last o√e, I promise. The√ ye ca√ rest. I’ll sail ye ta the cove a√’ letcha rest o√ the sa√d.” He looked back out towards the Dragon Star, “Or we’ll both be √othi√’ but salvage. Either way, we do this together, aye? Show me that mighty stre√gth ye had before.” Deep in the bowels of the ship, he heard her groan. He chuckled dryly and pat the mast. “Atta girl.”

He fell silent once more as he watched the Dragon Star approach. This time, he thought, this time is definitely different. Neither had their crews to man the stations or fight alongside them. Neither had the strength they possessed that day. Ruthless himself had no will for this fight. His bloodlust had died when she did. Even now, as he wore his old uniform, he did not wear his pins and patches; those belonged to someone who perished with her. He reached into his coat and pulled out his necklace. Looped on a silver chain were a pair of rings. One was studded with emeralds, while the other was adorned with amethyst. He clenched his hand around them and kissed his knuckles.

“RUTHL£$$ D££PBIT£!!”

And just like that, the night was broken. The vase wobbled closer to its edge. The captain raised his head to see the Dragon Star glide up beside him, so that they were side by side. Of course, the Dragon Star was in pristine condition; Ruthless had no doubt he’d put it back together once he had returned. Standing on its deck was Alastr Afasia, in all his glory. The bronzeblood raised his boot and placed it on the edge, leaning forward with his elbow on his knee.

“Ar£ you r£ady, old man? It’$ tim£ for you to join that worthl£$$ w£n€h you w££p for!” Forsaken called across the water. Ruthless slid the necklace back into his coat and stepped forward.

“√o, Alastr. Where she has go√e, I ca√’t follow. But I’ll meet ye dow√ there eve√tually.” He said, his voice even and emotionless. Forsaken tisked, before he laughed cruelly.

“P£rhap$ you’r£ right. $o,” He reached into his trench coat and pulled out his pistol, aiming it at Ruthless’ face. He cocked the hammer, “got any la$t word$ for th£ living?” Ruthless merely shook his head.

“Ye’re pathetic, Alastr.” He said tiredly, “A thousa√d years, a√’ ye ca√’ let thi√gs go. I √ever did a√ythi√’ ta ye. A√’ whatever I did do ta ye, I did√’t mea√ ta. I √ever k√ew ye existed ‘til ya killed Lucy.” He took another step forward, “Ye’re the o√e that destroyed my world, √ot the other way arou√d.”

Forsaken seemed to falter for a moment; it was slight, but his pistol dipped towards the deck, before his expression hardened and he jerked it back up.

“Liar! Your fan€y word$ won’t $av£ you h£r£, £-”

“Do √ot!” Ruthless cut him off, a snarl now on his lips, “Ye do√’ get ta say my √ame! O√ly she ca√ say my √ame!” Forsaken paused, before he laughed.

“Fin£, what£v£r. Your nam£ €an fall to th£ bottom of th£ o€£an along with your €orp$£.” He spat. He tensed as a thought occurred to him, before he brightened. “A€tually, your body won’t mak£ it that far. $hall I introdu€£ you to the on£ who will g£t to it fir$t?”

“What-” Ruthless began, as Forsaken swung his arm around and fired into the water. The gunshot cracked through the air, the bullet disappearing into the waves. As the ringing died away, a rumble filled the air. It was deep- subsonic- Ruthless could feel it in his very bones.

That was not a rumble, he realized with a cold shock of fear, but a roar.

Something under the water was responding to the gunshot.

He barely had the mind to lunge, to grab the mast and hold on, as the ocean exploded.

Sea water blasted into the air around him, climbing higher than the turbulent waves in a storm, as another roar- now unmuted by the water- swelled through the air, filling the empty space until Ruthless felt like he couldn’t breathe.

The unholy, righteous fury behind the sound made him go cold. That was a sound that even banshees and demons ran from. It could curdle milk, boil blood, and make even the stars quiver and weep. He heard the boards in his ship crack with the force behind it as the Warshark was tossed to and fro by the waves.

Still, she stayed upright, and Ruthless could only watch as a humongous serpentine head rose from the chaotic, frothing sea. He didn’t realize he was shouting until water fell on his tongue. The once clear sky was suddenly swirling with dark clouds, which crackled and lit up with lightning. Thunder undercut the sounds around him, before the sky opened and rain fell with the sea water.

Distantly, he heard Forsaken cackle.

“YOU MAY HAV£ HAD A M£GALODON RUTHL£$$, BUT I, I HAV£ A L£VIATHAN!!” He howled with glee.

Ruthless clutched the mast tighter as he watched the ungodly monster rise. His mind could barely comprehend the size of the beast. It was just- too fucking big, and he was only seeing a portion of it. Its scales were black, black as the void of night, but its teeth- its teeth were blindingly white as it opened its mouth and screamed. Finally, it turned to face him, and Ruthless stared into the eyes of his own oblivion.

Those were the eyes of the devil, he thought. Eyes so red, so deep, deep red, that even the Empress would hesitate to touch the color. Those eyes lived for nothing but to watch carnage and slaughter. Those eyes had seen the gods and laughed at their pitiful powers. Those eyes held a hunger that could not be sated, even if the monster swallowed the stars themselves.

As sea water washed across the deck, drenching the captain, he felt his resilience fail. He could not fight that thing, and he knew it. He dug his claws into the wood and turned away, squeezing his eyes shut as he waited for the end.

“Alastr!”

A voice cried out, nearly buried under the noise, and Ruthless jerked around to look.

Upon the Dragon Star’s deck, a pillar of fire erupted. Ruthless flinched as one appeared on his own ship. Out of the flames stepped Decaying, Incoding, Innocent, and Musrio. On Forsaken’s ship, Drayco emerged from their own pyre, once more in their Black Hand Form. All five of them stumbled as they stepped onto the rocking decks, but they stayed upright.

“What the hell are ye doi√’ here?!” Ruthless shouted at his morails and the rustbloods. If they answered, he couldn’t hear it as thunder shook the sky. Musrio met his eye and grimaced, before he tipped his head towards the Dragon Star.

Glancing at the monstrous serpent, he saw it dip back below the waves momentarily, only to reappear on the other side of their ships; it was circling them. It wasn’t here to kill him, he realized with faint relief, it was to keep him from running away; or at least, it wouldn’t kill him until Alastr gave the word. Safe for the moment, Ruthless turned back to the bronzebloods.

They looked like they were arguing, but Ruthless could barely hear past the rush of blood in his ears. Drayco’s tattoo- the skeletal hand- was glowing against their skin as they raised their claws.

“Enoough oof this! Yoour fight will resoolve noothing! Send yoour moonster away!” Drayco bellowed, their voice deep and commanding, stronger than Ruthless had ever heard it.

“You und£r$tand nothing, you path£ti€ €hild! G£t out of my way!” Forsaken snarled. Drayco braced their feet.

“Noo! Yoou must listen too me! Yoou will die if yoou coontinue!” They cried, almost pleadingly.

“$il£n€£! The only on£ who will di£ h£r£ is Ruthl£$$! Mov£!”

“Please, Foors-” They got no further. Snarling, Forsaken raised his pistol and pointed it at them.

“G£t! Out! Of! My! Way!” He shrieked, spittle flying from his lips and his eyes popping wide. He’s lost his mind, Ruthless thought, swallowing heavily.

“NO!” Musrio screamed.

Several things happened then; Ruthless watched them all in slow motion, like he was going frame-by-frame in a movie.

First, Forsaken squeezed the trigger.

Second, a burst of fiery light flashed on the Warshark’s deck, followed by another one appearing on the Dragon Star, not a moment later, situated between the ancestor and descendant.

Third, Musrio leaped from that fire, his arms out wide as he threw himself towards the pirate, his robes flapping in the wind.

Fourth, thunder cracked and lightning flashed as dark red blood sprayed through the air, and Musrio crumpled to the deck.

Time snapped back into place like a rubber band as the gunshot rang out, and Drayco was screaming. Forsaken was laughing. Innocent, Decaying and Incoding were shouting.

And Ruthless was running.

He ran for the edge of his ship, tagging the side of it with his palm as he vaulted over. There were mere feet between the two vessels, and he cleared the gap easily, ripping his sabers from their sheaths.

Blood was roaring in his ears as he spared a glance at the fallen boy. Just like her, his head sang; he fell just like her.

A fury, a rage that had been building for a thousand years, a frenzy held back by booze and regret and the gentle paps of his morails, burst within his chest like firecrackers overloaded with gunpowder.

The vase had shattered.

Screaming, he barreled into Forsaken, sending him flying across his own ship.

“Drayco! Get Musrio ta me ship!” Ruthless thundered, glancing back only momentarily. Drayco, who’d dropped to their knees beside the bleeding rust, looked up and nodded, gathering their fallen matesprit in their arms. A burst of fire, and they were on the Warshark with the others, who immediately rushed to assist the fallen troll.

Forsaken was picking himself up, groaning weakly. Rain pounded the deck around them as he got to his feet. As he rose, his mask fell from his face and clattered to the floor. Snarling, he kicked it away. He turned to face Ruthless, his only eye bright with wrath and insanity.

The left side of his face was disgustingly marred; the skin was all but gone, revealing bone and muscle that had turned black. His eye was gouged out, the hole oozing thick blood as thin flaps of skin- what was once his eyelid- fluttered in the wind. Even a chunk of his nose was missing, blown off with the rest of it.

Forsaken bared his teeth at Ruthless, who had frozen in shock. “THI$ I$ WHAT YOU DID TO M£, RUTHL£$$ D££PBIT£!! THI$, AND MOR£!!” He howled, spittle flying from his lips. He reached into his coat for his pistols, but found them gone. Eye wide, he cast around the deck frantically, and saw them lying behind Ruthless.

Ruthless braced his feet, his face set and grim.

“I did√’ do shite, Alastr, but yer go√√a pay fer what you did.” He snarled in a low voice; the voice he once had, full of command and grandeur, befitting one of his status. He could feel the rush in his veins again; the call for blood and glory, the siren song of the merciless kill.

Before the lowblood could move, the captain was upon him, rocketing towards him with his sabers raised.

“THIS IS FOR LUCI√A!!!” He boomed, his voice lifted higher by the thunder that crashed around them. As the leviathan roared, Forsaken threw his arms up to shield himself.

Blood splattered the deck, only to be washed away by the rain. Lightning flashed so bright it blinded the others, who stood upon the Warshark. When their vision returned, they peered through the torrential rain and waves.

Innocent took a step forward, but Decaying grabbed his arm. Innocent paused and glanced at him, confused.

“Th- shark and snak- hav- m-t th-ir fat-, and n_w th- b-ast shall awak-.*” The madman rumbled. Innocent blinked, pulling down his mask as he looked out at the Dragon Star. *(The shark and snake have met their fate, and now the beast shall awake.)

Ruthless panted, his whole body trembling as he looked down at his foe. Impaled through the chest and shoulder, his blood pooling around him as he fought for breath, Forsaken blinked up at him. Ruthless had him pinned to the deck, with one boot on his stomach as he bent over the lowblood.

Forsaken gurgled and coughed, blood spattering his lips as he blinked at the seadweller with a suddenly clear eye.

“Ruth... l£$$...” He wheezed through grit teeth. With the arm that wasn’t pinned, he reached up and grabbed the violetblood’s sleeve. “pl£a$£... my pistol$... I- I want to- n££d to- d- ah- di£ with my w£apon$...” He pleaded, his voice barely more than a croak as he forced each word out. Ruthless hesitated, but nodded. He stepped off the dying troll and walked over to the abandoned guns. Picking them up, he moved back to Forsaken and placed them in each hand. The bronzeblood gripped them tightly, but made no move to attack. He sighed a soft, “Thank you.” and closed his eyes.

Suddenly exhausted, Ruthless crumpled to his hands and knees beside him. He looked down at the bronze for a long moment as their breathing got fainter.

“I’m sorry, Alastr. I du√√o what I did, but I’m sorry it drove ye ta this. I √ever wa√ted a√y o’ this. Ye took me wife away, a√d I- I did√’ eve√ go dow√ sweari√’ ve√gea√ce. I just- I wa√ted ta see Luci√a agai√. I may √ever get ta, but- it’s too late √ow, ai√’t it? I’m sorry.”

Forsaken was silent, his breathing slow and tepid. He opened his eye and stared up at the rain, before he chuckled weakly.

“... Warhound.” he rasped. Ruthless looked at him.

“What?”

“H£r nam£... i$ Warhound now. Lu€ina “Warhound” £v- £vrr£n. $h£’$ looking for you, too, but $h£ ha$n’t mad£ it ba€k to the world of th£ living y£t.” He coughed, forcing each word through numb lips.

“What the blazes are ye-?” He started, but Forsaken took a deep, shuddering breath, his grip going lax on his pistols.

He let the breath out slowly, and breathed no more.

Ruthless shut his mouth and clenched his jaw. He sat there a moment more, then rose to his feet. As he ripped his sabers from the corpse, the Dragon Star rocked violently; down below, he felt the vibrations of the leviathan’s roar.

“Ah, fuck. I fergot about the big bitch.” He muttered, sliding his blades back into his belt. He turned and ran for the edge of the ship, vaulting back over to the Warshark. He paused to get his footing, then jogged over to the others; the rain was still falling, but not as heavily now. He opened his mouth, ready to tell them off for coming when he’d expressively told them not to do that, but shut it again at the sight of Musrio.

Drayco was bent over the rustblood, who was laid out on his back, propped up on one elbow. Drayco had pulled down his robes to reveal the wound; Forsaken’s bullet had ripped straight through his left chest, most likely through his heart. It was bleeding steadily, the white of his robes already red. Musrio, his teeth clenched, kept his other hand over the wound and growled each time Drayco tried to touch him. His hand was covered in his own blood and glowing a dull white.

Incoding glanced up, the first to notice Ruthless’ presence. “He’s try1ng t0 heal the w0und h1mself,” He explained quietly, “but F0rsaken must have had s1lver bullets 0r s0me sh1t, because 1t w0n’t cl0se.”

“Not silver.” Musrio snarled, “The fucking sxlt- I cxn’t concentrxte with the stinging xnd thxt stupid snxke.” He suddenly flopped back, his head hitting the deck as he panted. Drayco leaned over him, an anxious whine in their throat. Musrio opened his eyes and blinked up at them.

“Are yoou gooing too die, Mush?” They asked quietly. Musrio pursed his lips.

“No.” He grunted, gritting his teeth in pain, “Don’t think I cxn, even if I wxnted to. My job’s not done. Plus...” He sighed, reaching up to touch Drayco’s cheek, “I’m not done with you yet. Ribbit.”

“Done... with me?” Drayco repeated; Musrio’s blood was now smeared on their face, but they either didn’t notice or care. Musrio hummed.

“You promised you’d repxir everything from before.” He said softly. Drayco bowed their head.

“... I’m trying.” They whined softly, “I doon’t knoow what I’m dooing.” Musrio snorted, before gasping with pain.

“No shit.” He muttered, grabbing Drayco’s shirt, “You hxven’t even tried to kiss me yet.” Drayco froze, their head jerking up in shock.

“Kiss yoou?” They repeated, stunned. Musrio raised an eyebrow.

“You remember our last kiss, don’t you?”

“I... oof course I doo. I was-”

“Yexh. It sucked. Thxt’s something you’ve got to mxke up to me, too.”

“But I-” Drayco broke off with a squeak of fright as Musrio surged up, smashing his lips against theirs. Drayco went still as a stone, confounded by this sudden change of events. “Mush...?” they mumbled. Musrio rumbled low in his throat, and Drayco gave in, pulling the rust close and kissing him deeply.

Ruthless quirked an eyebrow as he watched Musrio’s free hand reach up and grasp Drayco’s dangling amulet. He squeezed it tightly, and a dull, red-orange light seeped through his fingers, before it began to bleed across the necromancer’s skin, up his sleeves until it bled across his chest and into the wound, which began to close. The bullet was forced out of his skin and it clattered to the deck. Musrio finally pulled away, releasing Drayco’s pendant.

“Better.” He mumbled, his face as red as it could get. Drayco blinked at him, panting and breathless, their own cheeks dark, before their face split into a grin.

Ruthless smiled faintly, before the ship trembled again as the leviathan roared. His expression dropping, he turned on his heel and stormed towards his cabin.

“Ru?” Incoding called after him, puzzled, but the captain didn’t answer. When he returned, he was carrying a large rifle over his shoulder, and his necklace in one hand. He pushed the rings into Innocent’s hand.

“Hold these fer me, will ye? I’ll be back.”

“... Ruthless, what are you going to do?...”

“You’re n0t g01ng t0 f1ght that th1ng, are y0u?!” Incoding demanded, stepping forward. Ruthless turned to look at his morails.

“I am.”

“That’s su1c1de!”

“Aye, probably. But it does√’ look like it’s goi√’ away a√y time soo√.”

“S0 y0u’re g01ng after 1t w1th a r1fle?” Incoding asked doubtfully.

“Aye, Orpha√ers ai√’t the o√ly o√es with cool weapo√s.” He turned away, squaring his shoulders. Without waiting for an argument, he strode towards the edge of the ship. He climbed onto the edge and paused, staring down into the dark water.

Unbidden, a memory surfaced in his mind.

“Hey, Lucy?” “Hey, Ruthless?” “I’m in love with ye.” “Are you?” “Aye. I want ye ta be me matesprit.” “What if I don’t want to be yours?” “Then I will throw meself inta the sea.”

“You threw yourself into the sea. Now what?” “If ye won’t be me mate, I will summon a beast ta eat me!” “I won’t be your mate!”

“You’ve thrown yourself into the sea, and you’ve been eaten by a beast. Now what?” “What more can I do, to prove I love you?” “Kiss me.”

He squeezed his eyes shut, forcing the memory back into the dark as he stepped off the edge and plummeted.

He hit the water, and came alive. His gills opened, sucking in that deliciously cold water as bubbles streamed out of his mouth; it was always a disorienting moment, going from air to water. His fins flared and flapped as an instinctive delight kicked in. Finally, the tiny, barely noticeable freckles that decorated every inch of him woke up. He was glowing, a warm, purple light that lit up the dark.

He turned, and saw his glow reflected in the eyes of the serpent. It had gone still, suddenly transfixed by his light. Ruthless smiled, swimming closer to it.

Dredging up ancient memories, he spoke to it in the language of the sea. Alastr is gone, he told it, his voice low and quiet, like the swish of waves on sand. Your fight is done. Go back to the deep.

I will not, it rumbled back, its tongue dripping with poison and hate, I am hungry. I shall devour you and your ships, then I shall retreat.

No, he snarled firmly, no! He pulled his rifle around and leveled it at the leviathan’s face. I will not let you hurt them! I have lost enough to the fangs of fate, your maw shall not take anything more!

The leviathan laughed. If you think you can kill me, mortal, then I invite you to try. I am a being that has eviscerated the gods themselves. There are none who are beholden to my wrath and survive.

Ruthless’ fins flared in agitation. But like the whisper of a ghost, he saw something flicker below the serpent’s belly. He paused, relief sweeping through him harder than the tidal currents that held him aloft. He chuckled, closing his eyes. He came, he thought.

“√ice ta see ye agai√, Krayk√.” He called, opening his eyes again.

“F̸a̶t̸h̴e̷r̸.̸ ̵I̸t̵ ̸h̷a̶s̶ ̴b̵e̵e̸n̴ ̶t̴o̴o̷ ̸l̶o̶n̴g̸ ̷s̸i̵n̵c̵e̶ ̴y̶o̸u̶ ̴c̴a̸m̸e̴ ̵t̸o̴ ̸m̶e̴.̶ ̶S̷h̷a̴l̶l̴ ̷I̴ ̵r̸i̵d̸ ̶y̶o̶u̵ ̸o̵f̸ ̴t̵h̸i̴s̸ ̴b̷e̶a̵s̸t̷?̷” a voice answered. The voice, just like the monster’s roar, was subsonic, so deep and loud that it was near silent.

“Aye, that’d certai√ly be helpful.” Ruthless purred.

From the darkness, a bright red light burst into being, illuminating the body of a monster as it shot towards them. That monster- Kraykn, as Ruthless had called him- reached out with giant claws and grasped the leviathan’s throat.

Swinging around like a cowboy onto a steer, he straddled the serpent and hooked his talons into it’s armor-like scales.With a roar that was no louder than a dead man’s breath, he ripped the head to the side as the leviathan snarled its last. The head ripped away, and the water was suddenly clouded as gallons of ancient blood spilled through it.

Ruthless reached out through the cloud, and a hand bigger than his torso found his fingers. They gripped his hand oh so gently, pulling him close. Once freed of the fog, he kicked away and swam up to the monster’s face.

“Ye’ve gotte√ a hell o’ a lot bigger, have√’t ye, Krayk√?” He grinned, their glows illuminating one another.

“I̸ ̴h̷a̷v̷e̴,̵ ̵f̷a̴t̴h̷e̵r̸.̷ ̷T̶h̴e̴ ̴r̶e̵w̷a̷r̸d̴s̶ ̶o̷f̶ ̸t̶h̷e̸ ̴d̴e̶e̸p̷ ̶f̷a̶v̶o̶r̵ ̶m̶e̸.̴” Kraykn sighed. Ruthless chuckled.

“What is it I hear ye’re calli√’ yerself these days? Ye chose a title, did√’tcha?”

“Y̷e̵s̷,̶ ̴f̶a̶t̷h̴e̵r̴.̴ ̵I̵n̵ ̸t̸h̶e̸ ̴d̸e̴e̵p̵,̵ ̵I̷ ̶a̴m̷ ̶k̶n̷o̵w̷n̵ ̵a̴s̵.̵.̸.̷ ̵t̴h̵e̴ ̸S̵u̵r̶v̴i̸v̴o̸r̴.”

“The Survivor.” Ruthless repeated, a gravely purr starting in his throat, “It suites ye. You’ve bee√ dow√ here all this time, have√’t ye?”

“Y̷e̷s̸.̸ ̴L̶o̵n̸g̶ ̶b̸e̴f̷o̸r̴e̸ ̶m̴o̶t̵h̸e̷r̸ ̶l̸e̴f̵t̶,̴ ̴a̴n̴d̸ ̶l̶o̷n̵g̸e̸r̵ ̶s̷t̸i̶l̸l̶ ̸a̶f̸t̵e̵r̶ ̸y̷o̷u̵.̵” Ruthless swam closer, touching the giant’s face gently.

“I’m sorry, lad. I wish I coulda told ye in perso√.” he murmured. Survivor turned his head away.

“I̴t̷ ̵i̴s̶ ̵n̵o̷t̸ ̵a̸ ̴m̵a̸t̶t̵e̴r̸ ̵o̸f̸ ̷i̷m̸p̸o̴r̴t̸a̵n̷c̸e̵ ̶a̶n̵y̶m̴o̴r̴e̸.̷ ̶T̴h̶a̴t̸ ̶w̸a̴s̵ ̸m̴a̶n̶y̸,̴ ̸m̵a̴n̸y̷ ̸s̸w̴e̵e̷p̴s̶ ̵a̷g̷o̸.̷ ̴I̴ ̵n̵o̸w̸ ̶h̸a̶v̴e̴ ̴a̷ ̷d̶e̴s̷c̵e̴n̷d̷a̵n̶t̸ ̷o̵f̵ ̶m̵y̷ ̶o̷w̸n̷.̴ ̶W̷o̷u̶l̷d̷ ̸y̷o̶u̶ ̸c̷a̵r̷e̷ ̴t̸o̶ ̴m̸e̸e̶t̸ ̴h̵i̶m̸?̵“ he asked softly. Ruthless perked up.

“Ye got yerself a lil’ bastard, too, huh? Hell yeah, lemme met me gra√dgrub.” Survivor turned and looked down into the abyssal darkness below them. The leviathan’s body was slowly sinking into black, and crouched up the remains, was another troll.

“A̴s̴h̴h̸u̸r̵.̷ ̵C̷o̷m̸e̷,̴ ̷m̶e̵e̸t̶ ̸m̷y̷ ̴f̴a̶t̶h̵e̷r̶.̴“ Survivor called quietly. The other figure looked up,then kicked off the corpse and swam towards them.

“Ashhur, huh?” Ruthless repeated as the second giant moved closer. “‘s √ice ta meet ye, lad.” Ashhur regarded him for a long moment.

“-.-- --- ..- / .- .-. . / ... ..- .-. ...- .. ...- --- .-. .----. ... / ..-. .- - .... . .-. ..--..*” *(You are Survivor’s father?)

Ashhur clicked and hummed his words. He never learned Alternian, Ruthless realized with faint amusement; it wasn’t much of a surprise, Survivor could barely speak it himself.

“I am.” he clicked back. Ashhur looked mildly surprised, but pleased. He nodded.

“-.. --- / -.-- --- ..- / ... - .. .-.. .-.. / ... . .-. ...- . / - .... . / . -- .--. .-. . ... ... ..--..*” *(Do you still serve the Empress?)

“√o. I left that life a lo√g time ago.” Ashhur frowned, clearly unhappy with that answer.

“.-- .... . -. / .. / .- -- / . -- .--. . .-. --- .-. --..-- / .-- .. .-.. .-.. / -.-- --- ..- / ... . .-. ...- . / -- . ..--..*” *(When I am Emperor, will you serve me?)

Ruthless’ eyebrows arched. “Yer go√√a be Emperor, huh?” Ashhur nodded.

“I̷t̷ ̷i̷s̸ ̸h̵i̵s̸ ̸d̴r̷e̸a̶m̵ ̷t̴o̴ ̵r̶u̷l̶e̴.̴“ Survivor murmured. Ashhur glared at him.

“.. / .-- .- ... / -... --- .-. -. / - --- / .-. ..- .-.. . -.-.--*” He hissed. Ruthless bit back a laugh; he had a feeling young Ashhur had never been to the surface. If he had, he wouldn’t want to rule, and he certainly wouldn’t be wearing pink. *(I was born to rule!)

“‘s certai√ly √ot a bad dream.” He said instead, glanced towards the surface. “Ca√ ya’ll withsta√d the lack o’ pressure ta come up a√’ say hi ta me ‘rails?” Survivor’s fins twitched and he nodded.

“T̷h̵a̸t̶ ̴s̵o̷u̵n̶d̵s̶ ̵f̴e̶a̶s̴i̵b̷l̸e̷.̴” He whispered. Ruthless nodded and turned, kicking towards the surface.

Up on the ship, Incoding and Innocent leaned on the edge of the Warshark, staring into the black water. Musrio was sitting up, dressed once again, and leaning on Drayco’s shoulder. Drayco was shyly holding his hand, unable to raise their gaze from their own lap, while Musrio gazed up at the stars. The rain had finally dissipated, and the clouds had scattered. Meanwhile, Decaying paced the ship’s length, muttering under his breath.

All five of them jumped in surprise as Ruthless suddenly shot out of the water, into the air, and landed on the deck. He dropped his rifle at his feet, shaking his head frantically and spraying sea water.

“Ruthless!” Incoding and Innocent ran to him, concern on both of their faces. “Are y0u 0kay?” Incoding asked anxiously, scanning the seadweller for wounds.

“I’m fi√e, Cody, I promise. The big bitch’s bee√ dealt wit’. I got someone I wa√tcha to meet.” He rumbled, patting the goldblood on the shoulder. Incoding scowled.

“You’re n0t f1ne, y0u fuck1ng d1ck, d0n’t l1e.” Ruthless paused, then snorted.

“Aye, fair e√ough. We ca√ talk whe√ we get home.” He murmured. Innocent stepped forward and held out the rings and chain to Ruthless, who took it. “Tha√k ye, love.” Innocent nodded. As Ruthless slipped the chain around his neck again, he tipped his head towards the water. “I got someone I wa√t you two ta meet.” he repeated, leading them towards the edge of the ship. Decaying, who had gone still, moved towards them. He grabbed Incoding’s arm, shying behind him. Incoding paused, turning to look at his boyfriend.

“Y0u 0kay, Br1?”

“Th- b-ast.” Decaying mumbled, “Th- b-ast is h-r-. The b-ast-*” *(The beast. The beast is here. The beast-)

“Aye, he sure is, rusty,” Ruthless said without turning around, “but he wo√’t hurtcha.”

Even Drayco and Musrio got up to cluster close to the edge of the ship to look as Survivor and Ashhur emerged from the water. Survivor rose as far as his waist, but even then, he towered over the ships; he was just a smidgen over twenty-four feet tall, after all. Ashhur, who couldn’t have been older than Musrio or Drayco, wasn’t even half of that; he himself was five and a half feet in stature. Then again, he wasn’t over a thousand years old.

“H0ly fuck!” Incoding shouted. Instantly, Survivor and Ashhur ducked into the water, their fins folding in fear. Ruthless’ hand clapped over the gold’s mouth.

“Ye ca√√y yell ‘rou√d them, Cody. ‘Specially out o’ the water like this. Ye’ll break their eardrums.” He explained in a low voice, “They weren’t raised ‘rou√d big √oises, a√’ they startle real easy.” Incoding’s eyes widened.

“S0rry.” He muttered. Ruthless dropped his hand and leaned over the edge.

“It’s alright, Krayk√. He did√’ mea√ ta scare ya.” He crooned as he reached towards the water. Survivor, who’s sunk down until only his eyes were above the surface, reached up for his father’s hand and held it like a scared child.

“W̷h̴o̶ ̴a̶r̶e̸ ̴t̷h̷e̷y̵,̶ ̴f̷a̵t̶h̴e̵r̵?̸“ he murmured.

“This here be I√√oce√t, Incodi√’, Decayi√’, Musrio, a√d Drayco.” Ruthless explained softly, nodding to each troll in turn, “I√√oce√t a√’ Cody be my ‘rails. Decayi√’ is Cody’s mate, Musrio is Decayi√’s desce√da√t, a√d Drayco is Musrio’s... eh...” He glanced at the two teenagers.

“Friend.” Musrio supplied. Ruthless nodded.

“Frie√d.”

“.-- .... --- / .. ... / - .... . / -.-. --- .-. .--. ... . / --- -. / - .... . / --- - .... . .-. / ... .... .. .--. ..--..*” Ashhur asked, pointing at the Dragon Star. *(Who is the corpse on the other ship?)

Ruthless looked up at the other ship, his face becoming hard. “Ah. Right, fergot about that. He...” he looked down at Survivor, “He was yer mother’s killer.” Survivor’s fins pricked up at the mention of his mother, before he scowled.

“I̵ ̵d̵o̸ ̶n̸o̶t̶ ̴w̵a̵n̴t̵ ̴t̶h̴a̷t̷ ̵s̴h̶i̵p̷ ̴i̴n̸ ̷m̸y̵ ̸w̴a̴t̶e̶r̸.̶“ He mumbled.

“Ye ca√ destroy it.” Ruthless assured him, “Just lemme take these lads back ta la√d.” Survivor blinked at him.

“W̷i̷l̷l̷ ̸y̶o̴u̶ ̶c̷o̵m̸e̸ ̸b̴a̴c̷k̶?̷“ He whispered. Ruthless smiled softly.

“Aye, √ow that I know yer still ‘rou√d. I always come back, remember?” Survivor nodded, satisfied, and released the violet’s hand.

“W̷e̸ ̷w̸i̶l̷l̸ ̵w̴a̴i̴t̵ ̷f̷o̵r̸ ̸y̶o̵u̴r̵ ̴r̴e̸t̶u̷r̵n̴,̵ ̶f̷a̷t̴h̸e̴r̶.̶“ He purred, before he tuned and dove under water again, revealing a fan of spines and fins on his back as he disappeared. Ashhur watched him go, then looked up at them.

“.. / --. --- / .-- .. - .... / ... ..- .-. ...- .. ...- --- .-. / ..-. --- .-. / -. --- .-- --..-- / -... ..- - / .. / .-- .. .-.. .-.. / .-. . - ..- .-. -. --..-- / - --- --- .-.-.- / .. / .-- .. ... .... / - --- / ... . . / .-- .... .- - / - .... .. ... / .-- --- .-. .-.. -.. / .. ... / .-.. .. -.- . / -. --- .-- .-.-.-*” He bubbled, before he looked up at Innocent, “.-- . / .- .-. . / --- -. . / .. -. / - .... . / ... .- -- . --..-- / -... .-.. --- --- -.. / .-. . .-.. .- - .. ...- . .-.-.- / .. / -.-. .- -. -. --- - / .-- .- .. - / - --- / ... . . / .-- .... .- - / -.-- --- ..- .-. / ... .--. .- .-- -. / .. ... / .-.. .. -.- . .-.-.- / .. ... / .... . / .- / .-- --- .-.. ..-. --..-- / - --- --- ..--..**” *(I go with Survivor for now, but I will return, too. I wish to see what this world is like now. **We are one in the same, blood relative. I cannot wait to see what your spawn is like. Is he a wolf, too?)

Without waiting for an answer- Innocent didn’t understand him, anyway- he dove, too, flickering away into the dark. Ruthless waited until they were out of sight, before he let out a breath.

“Well, the√, let’s get ye la√d-lovers back ta solid grou√d.” He turned and strode away. As he did so, he reached up and gripped the rings around his neck, looking up at the sky. Were ye watchin’, love? He whispered, Our boy is alive an’ safe. This time, I promise, I won’t let ‘im down.

(EVERYONE PLEASE WELCOME KRAYKN AND ASHHUR JAYBEZ!!!)

[anahera-sdm]

Hotel Del Luna (2019) Thoughts

Warning: will contain spoilers. I suggest you watch the drama first to relate with what I’m talking about because it will be messy.

Disclaimer: Everything written only reflects my own thoughts. There’s a possibility of incoherence. Forgive me, sometimes my brain is all over the place.

Ever since IU was announced as a main lead for this drama, I have been looking forward to it. I have enjoyed IU’s other dramas especially her most recent one in Netflix - Persona. Yeo Jin goo is an actor I like but the last drama of his that I was able to finish (and barely at that) was Orange Marmalade (2015). I couldn’t get into his next dramas after that and ended up dropping them. 

After seeing the plot and the fantasy tag (I always have a soft spot for fantasy dramas), as much as I enjoyed and looked forward to new episodes of its predecessor, Arthdal Chronicles, I also could not wait for it to start. 

Additional warning: Everything is all over the place and this is going to be a lengthy post. I wrote everything that I wanted to talk about right after watching the subbed version of the last episode but there is no proper structure. I apologise in advance if you decide to read everything.

I don’t even know where I should start. The Hong Sisters really did well with this drama - the years spent on it was worth it. That ending was, I can’t believe I’m saying this but I was so satisfied even though they didn’t spend much time together in this life. I was expecting a bittersweet ending when the drama started anyway. I loved the ending and that reincarnation scene (although it is not definite but just an ‘eventually, it will end up that way’ scene) was everything to me. I don’t know why but I loved how they didn’t try to extend Man Wol’s time with Chan Seong (example, releasing her from the hotel and making her human again). It was enough for me because Man Wol also spent enough time suffering. Her time with Chan Seong, although brief, was good enough because she experienced the love she needed and she gets sent off full of it.  

That twist at the end though, how Chan Seong was chosen by Mago - I’m crying. Chan Seong was definitely a reincarnation of someone from her past. They were actually acquainted during Man Wol’s childhood - and he was the one who introduced her to the guesthouse of the moon. 

So now, let’s go to the other parts I really wanna talk about.

One of the reasons why I got hooked and invested with Hotel Del Luna was the fact the way they executed the comical elements despite the horror and drama tags. Additionally, the music and the CGI were really well done. The soundtrack really gets me.

The other reasons, well, IU can really pull off Jang Man Wol - a protagonist who can be ruthless, has a slightly bitchy attitude, crooked (but her actions can be justified) and holds a deep resentment. Yet, she has her cute sides too; all the Kim Joon Hyun moments were a sight to see (her obsession for the restaurants he’s been to, enjoyed it! Later we find out her obsession to find good restaurants were actually influenced by Chan Seong who went to the past! Mind blown!). And her fighting scenes were so cool. IU’s eyes are really expressive in my eyes - 

Appreciate.

I love how despite being crude in her ways when it comes to dealing with the grudges of the souls she’s helping, there is an underlying meaning to it - example, Hyun Joong being able to graduate because of the money donated by his friend. And, I can’t blame her for loving money and wealth. After all, that was what she didn’t have when she was living. I have to add that one of the things I look forward to every episode was IU’s outfit changes. She looks so good in everything! [I actually couldn’t stop myself from buying some of the stuff she wore. Hold your horses, I can only afford the cheap ones like the earrings and hair clips from Get Me Bling that she wore. And I wanna do a face palm because I accidentally bought 2 sets for one of her earrings so now I’m like, what do I do with this?]

The bickering between the leads together with that comical/mischievous soundtrack, pure gold. It’s easily one of my favourite moments. It’s just really funny how sometimes Jang Man Wol is left without words because Chan Seong is right.

The more I watch this gif tho, it starts to look weirder to look at so don't watch it more than 10 times.

I also like how they dealt with Man Wol’s back story - not giving the viewers everything in just one episode. Instead, it was spliced and distributed nicely throughout. Oh but gods, I was a wreck when everything was laid down - Chung Myung’s sacrifice... I just can’t. And how he was with her as a firefly since the beginning... My heart... I actually forgot that scene from the beginning until they showed it again. I though it was just an artistic shot. I actually wanted Man Wol to go with him to the afterlife when it was finally time for him to go. When she escorted him, I wanted her to walk with him during that moment. But at the same time, I can see that there was only a one-sided love left between them because Man Wol spent so many years resenting him that there was no love left. When she finally learned the truth, the only thing left in her was forgiveness and that was the only thing she can offer. The CGI on the bridge to the afterlife though, the aesthetic, props to the CGI team.

Can I just talk about how the actor grew on me? Like, omg, I’m now looking forward to any drama he’s going to be on. [Note: I have since seen him in a new drama, The Great Show (I was watching it because of Lee Sunbin (one of my favourite actresses)) and he’s the teen version of the male lead! I screamed when I saw him.] I should check him out on his previous dramas but when I saw the list of dramas, I don’t think I’ll get into them yet.

Help my heart, their story is so sad.

Helping Kim Seonbi /Kim Si Ik solve his grudge was really fun to watch. And the ‘fact’ that he was the writer of those stories almost all Koreans know, what a twist. Man Wol really cared for him despite not showing it to him - how she tried to find a way to solve his grudge and how she cried after he finally left. 

Choi Seo hee’s story was an unfortunate one but it added more flavour to the already flavourful drama. Those who value family ties or still have crooked views when it comes to family lineage will resonate with her story and perhaps have a change of heart.

Hyun Joong; I love how they gave more depth to his story. That it was not only because of his sister that he was staying as a hotel staff but deep inside there was a resentment. When they wrapped his story up, all I can do was to smile wistfully. His story arc with Yuna was a great addition despite their bittersweet goodbye.

The Sanchez story arc; I... I... He was such a fun character and a good friend to Chan Seong. I sincerely thought they were going to get rid of his character when he went overseas to oversee the funeral of his girlfriend. But we got him back and see another side to him - a rather relatable side where if one loses a loved one, they would find ways to reconnect or hold on to any sliver of hope that they’ll be able to once more be able to talk to them or give them something. Probably, not making sense anymore, but if you’ve lost a loved one before, you’ll get what I'm talking about. After finally getting over it, well, he was not the same Sanchez after that but there was growth in his character.

Mira and Young soo. A twist of fate, these two. Enemies in the past life but became lovers in their current life. Their bitter fates became sweeter this time around. I can't entirely hate on Mira’s past life because her next lives were spent repenting (although it wasn’t shown). Her currently life was finally rewarded, if you can call being with Young soo in her current life a reward. I kept on thinking Mira was just like Chan Seong (not a rich person) but I was so surprised to learn her parents were kimchi factory owners and that Young Soo ate those kimchi since young. 

Mago - easily my favourite character. Wait, characters. Because of how many personalities/sisters she has. Really have to give mad props to the actress. She is just so good. Probably my favourite sister has to be the pink sister and then the eldest. It was so funny when they were having a meeting discussing about the new hotel owner and mentioned the ‘poor’ sister still stuck in Joseon dynasty.

Ah, the cameos in this drama. I can’t not cover that.The amount of cameo is just, whoa! This drama is so rich with it. Some really memorable ones to me are: Kim Won hae (as a corrupt mayor), Lee Joon Gi (as an exorcist; Park Il Do hahah, The Guest feels (I ought to make a post on my thoughts about this drama soon); can’t forget the Scarlet Heart feels too), Lee Si Eon (as an astronaut; I couldn't help laugh at the scene), Lee Yi-kyung (as an actor who can’t really act; Waikiki feels!), Kim Joon Hyun (as himself; I screamed because the first few scenes didn't show his face), Park Jin Joo (as an imaginary spirit), Sulli (as the granddaughter of Chairman Wang), Nam Da reum(as a water deity; I really don’t like the fact he’s younger than me; kidding. He’s a talented kid.) Hwang Young Hee (as IU’s previous manager; she’s a really good actress) and Kim Soo Hyun (as the new owner of the hotel; He renamed it Hotel Blue Moon. I’m telling you, I hyperventilated when his scene came. Such a good way to end the drama - at least for me. Hotel Blue Moon as a drama please!)

For the last episode, I wanted to watch it during the actual broadcast time but I actually calculated the time wrongly (thinking I'm 4 hours ahead but actually just 3 hours; good thing I checked the site). I missed the first 25 mins of the actual broadcast. But I eventually re-watched it with subs and came to write this post). I can only understand roughly 80-85% of the dialogue for the raw version but even then, I was bawling - all the goodbyes; it was so sad but so satisfying at the same time because they were sent off really well. From Kim Seonbi’s to Choi Seohee’s. Painful to see the goodbyes but also very heartwarming; how they finally come to resolve their resentments, came to realizations and tied up loose ends - it was so beautiful. The relationship between the Hotel crew was just so precious - Jang Man Wol crying as she realises how she’ll miss them. Feels. Feels. Feels. 

Overall, I learned so many things in this drama and came to certain realisations such as treasuring the time you have with others, don’t take it for granted. One day, when the time to say goodbye comes, you won’t regret anything. Also, even the people who did bad things in their life can have the chance to live a better one in the next once they have paid for those wrongdoings.

This drama was a perfect blend of comedy, drama, horror, fantasy, romance. In terms of food, it satisfied my cravings. Watching this drama was one of the best things that I did this year. As much as I want to talk more about this drama and cover more areas, I should stop here. All in all, I would say, I really loved this drama. I’ll definitely go back to watching this when I have nothing else to watch. P.S. I ought to make a Jang Man Wol inspired look but when I tried, I failed. 

I’ll miss you, Jang Man Wol-ssi.

Rating: 10 / 10

Re-watch value : 10 / 10

Soundtrack : 10 / 10

[gwynne-fics]

Pictures

pulled

Rachel’s first thought when pain burst through her chest and Hye-Rim screamed was that something happened to Hyo-Shin. She grasped at her connections and looked down to find that it was Mother who was in pain. She scrambled for her phone and began crying when she didn’t pick up. A few seconds later, Mother called her back.

“What happened?”

“Rachel, this is Eun-Sang. Your mother is unconscious, covered in ash, and I’ve got a much bigger problem. Ji-Hyuk is dying. Can you come? I’m not sure what happened. One moment I was at work and the next I was here and it was an uncomfortable ride.”

“You’re not close to my mother but she must’ve used the connection anyway. Save Ji-Hyuk. I will call Young-Do and we’ll be there soon.”

“Thank you.” Eun-Sang hung up and Rachel called Young-Do as she got Hye-Rim ready. It was late enough at night, she could leave her pajamas on, but also too late to leave her with their cook, as she had gone home for the night and wouldn’t be back until early morning.

Rachel was panicked enough to want to pull herself to her mother but she knew that was too dangerous and she couldn’t take Hye-Rim with her.

Young-Do picked up on the second ring. “Something’s happened with Omma and Kang Ji-Hyuk. Omma pulled Eun-Sang to her and is unconscious. Eun-Sang said Kang Ji-Hyuk is dying. I’m headed there now.”

“He’s a healer, he can’t die.” She heard him scrambling in the background.

“What if his access was cut off?” Rachel was grateful that Hye-Rim was just quietly crying while she put her into the stroller and headed down to the parking garage. She hated using cabs but that was the fastest option right now. “If you ride your motorcycle, you can get there faster. Eun-Sang will need you.”

Rachel would need Young-Do and the strength of their connection. Hyo-Shin was at work and couldn’t leave, not even for something like this. He was doing so well and the wrap party was tomorrow night but he needed to finish the project himself. Already, directing offers were coming in and she was so happy that he was happy again.

Rachel hung up while she and the cab driver got Hye-Rim into her car seat and she explained that there was a family emergency. Rachel stared at her phone and hoped she wasn’t making a huge mistake as she dialed the Vice President of Jeguk.

Yoon Jae-Ho answered on the third ring. Thankfully, he answered. “This is Director Yoo Rachel, President Lee’s daughter. I have something of an emergency with my mother and I don’t know the extent of it yet. She pulled my sister-in-law to her to heal Kang Ji-Hyuk, who is mortally wounded in some way. They do not have a close relationship and it cost her. I think she needs to see a loving face when she wakes up. If that is something you can do, please meet me at her estate. I assume you know the codes to get in the gate and front door.”

“Yes, of course. I will come immediately.”

“Thank you.” Rachel hung up and texted Hyo-Shin what was going on and asked him to come pick up Hye-Rim when he finished with work. She briefly closed her eyes and tried to keep her connection to her daughter closed and her connection to her mother open.

Then Hye-Rim began crying again and she had to deal with that because the taxi driver was glaring at her. “Omma! Omma!” The words shocked her as Hye-Rim pulled at her connections. “No! No! Omma! Want, omma!”

“Oh, pretty Hye-Rim. I’m trying to protect you from my pain.” Rachel took Hye-Rim’s hand and pulled it away from her chest. She let her hold onto her fingers as she settled. Hye-Rim hugged her hand to her and Rachel suddenly felt very loved by her daughter. “I’m scared for Halmoeni. She always seems so strong. I never thought anything would knock her down.”

They arrived at the estate almost simultaneously with Young-Do and Go Nam-Il. Nam-Il took Hye-Rim for her and Rachel was relieved she had someone she trusted to hold Hye-Rim while she assessed the situation. She did not like how empty Mother’s estate was. All of the employees were missing. Even for late evening, that was unusual. Rachel decided she didn’t care as she and Young-Do made her way to Mother’s room.

The door was open and Rachel gasped when she saw that Mother was passed out, kneeling on the floor and leaning against the bed. The front of her dress was burned in two places and her lap was covered in ash. Rachel rushed to her side and searched for a pulse. It was low and thready but she wasn’t dead.

Rachel looked over at Eun-Sang, who sat on the edge of the bed, holding Kang Ji-Hyuk’s hands. Her hair was moving as if she were in an outside breeze and her eyes were closed. Rachel didn’t dare disturb her and it was obvious Young-Do felt the same way.

“There’s no blood,” she whispered. “What do you see?

“He is still dying but beyond that, I don’t know what Park Hee-Nam did to him.”

“Do you think it was her?”

Young-Do ran his hand over his mouth and looked pained for a few moments. “Kang Ji-Hyuk was loyal to our mother and he was teaching Eun-Sang because Omma asked him to. Unless there is another enemy out there we don’t know about, it is logical to assume this was her.”

Rachel closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Help me get her on the bed. I think she needs to be next to him.”

Young-Do came around and lifted Mother up and laid her next to Kang Ji-Hyuk.  Rachel smoothed out her hair and clothes. Mother stirred a little and made a pained sound but didn’t waken. Rachel sat with her for fifteen minutes before there was a knock on the bedroom door. They looked over to see Vice President Yoon standing there with tears in his eyes.

She immediately vacated her place next to her mother and had him take her hand. “See if you can breathe with her. I need to see to the house and my daughter. Young-Do, I’m sure Eun-Sang needs you in here.”

Young-Do didn’t argue with her. Rachel walked out of the bedroom and touched her connection to her mother. It wasn’t dead, just weak. Mother was strong. She would be fine. Even if they lost Kang Ji-Hyuk, Mother would be fine.

She walked back into the living room to find Go Nam-Il sitting on the floor with Hye-Rim and...Young-Do’s dog? She didn’t even care. The small puppy had his head on Hye-Rim’s lap while she babbled at Nam-Il and the dog. Rachel was just relieved that blocking the pain from their connection had left Hye-Rim’s mind altogether and she could focus on one of her favorite adults.

The security chief smiled up at her and she tried to smile back. “I don’t know what’s wrong. Right now, I just have to trust that Eun-Sang can handle it. Have you seen any of the staff?”

“No. It is possible President Lee sent them away, knowing she was about to do something dangerous.” He rose to his feet and put his hand on her shoulder. “What do you need, agassi?”

“I need my mother to wake up and be okay.” Rachel closed her eyes and tried not to cry. She knew she was an adult and she knew that he wasn’t her father and they met long past the time she needed a father, but whenever Go Nam-Il would hug her, she thought that this is what a father felt like. She wondered if this absolute calm and strength was what Hye-Rim felt whenever Hyo-Shin held her.

“I cannot make that happen but I believe President Lee won’t let you down, agassi. Let’s get some water. Cerberus will mind Hye-Rim.”

Rachel gave a desperate little laugh as she looked at the dog. It was walking little circles around Hye-Rim and she appeared delighted. Nam-Il took her into the kitchen and got her a glass of water before putting on a pot of tea. She was halfway through her cup when Hyo-Shin rushed into the house, surprising both Rachel and Hye-Rim.

He came to Rachel first and wrapped her up in a tight hug. Rachel started crying as she tried to breathe and cling at the same time. “What are you doing? You have work.”

“I put my assistant in charge of finishing up. You needed me more. How is it going? Is your mother okay?”

“Eun-Sang is still trying to heal Kang Ji-Hyuk,” she said. She had to look down because she felt something knock into her legs. It ended up being Hye-Rim. She buried her face in their knees and hugged their legs. Hyo-Shin eventually released Rachel to pick up Hye-Rim. Nam-Il picked up Cerberus to keep him from circling them and getting stepped on.

Hye-Rim hugged Hyo-Shin and in her tiny little voice said, “Halmeoni sick. Omma sad.”

“Yes,” Hyo-Shin kissed her forehead. “Hye-Rim is right. Look at you with all those words.”

Hye-Rim smiled bashfully and hid her face in his neck. Hyo-Shin took Rachel’s hand and brought her back into the living room. Nam-Il followed with a tray of tea and a surprisingly calm puppy. Hyo-Shin set Hye-Rim back on the floor so she could play with Cerberus. They sat in silence while they waited for news.

Hyo-Shin held Rachel while she cried.

[jos-corner-of-the-world]

Completed Kdramas.

Kdramas I’ve completed *In order of how I watched them!* and how I rate them..chat me up about ANY drama listed, or recommend more! :) **SOME CONTAIN SLIGHT SPOILERS!**

1. Strong Woman Do Bong Soon-- 10/10 **This was my introduction to the amazing world of kdrama, and oh boy did it hook me!! The chemistry between Bo Young and Hyung Sik will forever be etched into my brain!

2. The Heirs-- 8/10 **The most compelling thing in this show for me was Kim Woo Bin.  This was my first intro to second male lead syndrome.

3. Hwarang-- 7/10 **Not gonna lie, started this because of Kim Taehyung, and happily finished it because the drama brought more than I expected.  It was slow in places, but wrapped up well.

4. High Society-- 5/10 ** Not my cup of tea to be honest...I much preferred the second leads’ relationship over the first leads’.  Even Park Hyungsik wasn’t enough to keep me enthralled...this was a drama I completed just to get it over with.

5. Oh My Ghostess-- 10/10. PARK BO YOUNG IS DAEBAK! I seriously love this woman...she was able to portray two distinct personality types, sometimes nearly simultaneously. Also, Jo Jung-suk as Chef Kang made my heart race!

6. Healer-- 9/10 ** This would have gotten a ten had they wrapped up the loose ends a little better, alas, they did not...Also, this was my introduction to Ji Chang Wook.  His character is just amazing and JCW depicts him so well!

7. Emergency Couple-- 10/10 **This is still one of my favorites.  I liked the progression between Chang Min and Jin Hee, and how it wasn’t an immediate reconciliation when they met back up.  They both had themselves to find and were mature (most of the time) about giving eachother the space needed to make it work.

8. Weight-lifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo-- 10/10. **I loved everything about this drama. The story line, the actors, the chemistry between the leads, and I really loved Ji Il-joo as Joo-hyuk’s best friend :)

9. She Was Pretty 7/10 ** CHOI SI-WON!!! Kim Shin Hyeok is my favorite character in all of dramaland...unfortunately he was second male lead, and my favorite part about the drama.  All of the actors portrayed their characters well, I just didn’t connect with many of them throughout the whole show.

10. Fated to Love You 8/10 ** There were times when Gun was literally too much to handle..Also, episode 12 made me take a break from kdramas for a while and reflect on my life choice to become addicted to something like kdramas.  Before this episode I realized that I really was spoiled in the shows I watched not having scenes that literally made my heart feel constricted the way this one did.

11. To the Beautiful You-- 7/10 ** I liked the show overall, but thought that Sulli would never pass as a male... to me she still screamed female while dressed and living as a male. Kang Ha-Neul was the shinning point for me :)

12. Angel Eyes-- 7/10 ** KANG HA-NEUL! :)  The show was predictable at times which made it kind of drag on in places, and the female lead was frustrating af, but I enjoyed it overall.  Although the teenage years were only in a few episodes (and then some flashbacks) I think the pairing was much more endearing than the adults.  I also really liked the chemistry between Kang Ha-nuel and Name Ji-Hyun

13. Doctors-- 6/10** Not my cup of tea....Park Shin Hye was great, but it was kind of boring to me..The guest starring of Ji Soo was nice though :)

14. Shopping King Louie-- 9/10. I LOVED this drama.  I thought the character of Louie was endearing in how he didn’t understand much of the outside world (being rich and all) and relied on Bok-Shil to basically survive. Again, loved Nam Ji-Hyun in this.

15. Pinocchio-- 8/10 **HELLO LEE JONG-SUK! :) My favorite thing, other than watching the evolution of the leads’ relationship was watching the relationship between Dal-po and his brother, Jae-Myung.  I think the character development of Jae-Myung felt the most real to me.  How circumstances turned him into a killer and how he handled the aftermath of that, letting Dal-po settle things legally.

16. W (Two Worlds)-- 8/10 **Back to back Lee Jong-Suk.  I liked the complexities of this drama. There were times when I really wasn’t sure what was coming next and the suspense kept me returning to my computer as soon as possible to finish it!

17. Marriage, Not Dating-- 8/10 **Not gonna lie, the more I watching this, the more I WANTED To hate it, but I didn’t.  I’m not sure why I wanted to...I think it became semi predictable and some of the characters were hard pills to swallow, but damnit I was rooting so hard for Gi-tae and Jang-mi until the very end.

18. Love From Another Star 10/10 ** Let me count the ways...This was so endearing, and funny, and melancholic, and in places, SO FUCKING SAD. I will happily admit I cried, and when I inevitably watch it again, I’ll cry again.

[flying-princess]

Okay, the ending has settled in for me now. I’m ready to talk about it.

Spoilers for Squid Game’s ending!

I...didn’t like the twist. I thought it would’ve been more powerful if Il-nam died during the marble game and we all continued to believe he was just an innocent sick old man. It kinda sucked that they made him this last minute antagonist. In retrospect I can see how the twist kinda fits but it still isn’t a good twist in my opinion.

Please don’t make me hate a character I really cared about. You already killed off Sae-byeok and Ali don’t do the old man dirty too.

I also have a few things to say about our protagonist’s choices after the games were over. I feel it should have ended with Gi-Hun helping Sang-woo’s mom and Sae-byeok’s brother right after he got back from the game to honour those character’s dying wishes. They were his friends were they not? He cried for both of them after their deaths, did he not? I understand that the game experience was traumatic for him but to see him do nothing to help their families until after an entire year later hurts me.

Also he should have at least seen his daughter before clearly going on his way to try to take down the games as if he’s freaking Katniss Everdeen. 

The whole rest of the season was so good. It’s just a shame it ended the way it did. If I ever rewatch the show I’m only watching up to the point where the games end. That way I can make myself believe that everything that happened in canon after the games wasn’t actually canon and I can believe that Gi-hun did what I believe he should’ve done. I’d rather it be up to interpretation than straight answers of disappointment.

If none if these things bothered you with the show’s ending that’s fine but, for me, it was disappointing. 😕

So I finally finished watching Squid Game. It was intense and interesting but I’m not sure how to feel about the ending yet.

[kyufiber-main]

RANT

Alright, listen up. There is a list of actors that need to get the girl or be happy for goddamn once. 1) Yook Sungjae!!!!!!!!!! I cried my bloody eyes out because of School 2015 because despite how much I love Nam Joo Hyuk, Tae-kwang should’ve gotten Eunbi/Eunbyul. 100%, he was the strongest, most tragic second lead syndrome I’ve ever had. I get emotional thinking about. God.

2) Kim Woo Bin! Maybe it’s because I haven’t watched all his stuff, but I’ve watched Heirs, Uncontrollably Fond, and To the Beautiful You and the ending is NEVER happy for him! LET HIM BE HAPPY FOR ONCE.

3) Seo Kang Joon!!!! SERIOUSLY. Seo Kang Joon is my husband ok. In After School: Lucky or Not he was sort of a main lead but its not like he got a happy or romantic ending. I haven’t seen Cunning Single Lady, but I hear he was the second lead. In What Happens to My Family he was second lead, and LET’S NOT FUCKING TALK ABOUT CHEESE IN THE TRAP, LEST I DESTROY SOMETHING. My point is, how the fuck does he not have a single romance drama where he serves as the main lead? I seriously need this! Seo Kang Joon is a legend! Everyone knows him! He’s like Lee Jong Suk, except HE DOESN’T EVER GET THE GODDAMN GIRL.

4) Siwon! Yes, I know he was really only in She Was Pretty as second lead, but it was so tragic it deserves a mention.

5) Jisoo! BRB CRYING ABOUT SASSY GO GO. Okay, listen. I know he (SPOILER ALERT) (SPOILER ALERT) marries Hae Soo in Scarlet Heart: Ryeo, but did she ever rlly love him like he loved her? Nope. And oh my God, even though the endgame pairing in Sassy Go Go was OTP af, Jisoo really made me cry for him. And YES, I am aware he was main lead in the mini drama Page Turner but the point is he deserves a complete, official drama where he is MAIN LEAD.

I’m sure there are others, but these are the ones I can think of that piss me off.

Lee Jong Suk, Lee Min Ho, Jung Il Woo, Park Seo Joon, and Nam Joo Hyuk are all great actors, but they need to step tf back and let some of the resident second leads get the girl for once.

There needs to be more Lee Hyun Woo’s, Park Hyungsik’s, Ryu Joon Yeol’s in the world. You know, actors that have been second leads but get justice by being the main lead for another show. Like Hyungsik is second lead in Hwarang but in High Society and What Happens to My Family, he actually gets the girl, (I think). And omg Lee Hyun Wo was second lead in To The Beautiful You (psh who can resist Choi Minho tbh he’s like a Greek God) but then he beat another Kpop band member (Hongbin from VIXX) in Moorim School and got the girl! He deserved it, and he did a good job. WE NEED MORE OF THESE. WE DON’T NEED MORE KDRAMAS WITH LEE JONG SUK (has he ever lost the girl? EVER?) (you know you need to chill when you win Park Shinhye over).

So yeah. Rant over.

[gwynne-fics]

Quiet reconnection, 56, YoungRa 

“It’s so good to see your face.” 

Rachel is aware at how tender Young-Do is with her on the days she makes it out of her room and down to where he plays with the children. She cycles through health and sickness so rapidly that she wonders when he will just give up on her.

She has a terrifying moment when she comes down the stairs to an empty living room. She looks around and cannot find a note. There is no text on her phone. And she knows Young-Do has finally taken her babies and left her. She cries as she calls Go Nam-Il to demand his location so she can fight him for her children.

“Director Yoo,” he says quietly, “President Choi is with the children on the play set we just had installed. I will tell him--”

“No!” She clears her throat and curls her shaking hands into a fist. “No. I will go see them myself. Will you have the restaurant send up a picnic lunch for us?”

“Of course, Director Yoo.” She hangs up and goes back into their bedroom. She forces herself to wash her face and brush her hair. She puts on a simple dress and grabs a sweater because she had no idea what the weather is like now. She doesn’t bother with makeup because it will take too much time.

Rachel finds the play set area and has to gather some courage to walk out to her family. Min-Jae sees her immediately and claps his hands. “Omma! Omma!”

It draws So-Young’s attention and she starts fussing for Rachel. She carefully makes her way over, avoiding Young-Do’s gaze, as she forces herself to smile at her babies. She crouches down and hugs both of them. She tries not to cry when Young-Do touches her hand.

“I didn’t think you’d notice,” he says. “I should’ve left a note.”

“Nam-Il betrayed me,” she mutters but finally looks at him. The tenderness is so painful when he kisses her cheek.

“I was next to him when he got your call, that’s all. I’m sorry I gave you a panic. It’s so good to see your face. Will you play with us until lunch?”

Rachel nods and reaches for his hand when he pulls his away. “I would fight you for them. That’s important, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” he says hoarsely. “I am so glad for that.”

[gwynne-fics]

Becoming Royals

saying goodbye

Young-Do woke to Rachel on his other side and he smiled at her strategic move as he rolled over and looked down at her. She was trying to block him from getting out of bed without waking her. He smoothed her hair away from her face and watched her with an aching heart.

“I wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye,” he whispered as he kissed her temple. She wrinkled her nose and twisted her fingers tightly in his pants. She was awake and pretending. It was really cute and he was going to miss her. They made love as many times as they could last night and it didn’t feel like enough. He bent down and pressed his lips against her belly and laughed when their son kicked at him.

Rachel sighed and he could tell she was about to start crying. “Take Go Nam-Il with you,” she whispered. “You need someone watching your back.”

“It will only take a week to get there. Bo-Na will watch my back when we meet up at the mouth of the mountain pass. That’s three days. I can handle myself for three days.”

Her face twisted sadly and curled into him. He held her close and tried not to panic at her tears. She surprised him when she pushed him back and scrambled on top of him. He looked up at her, her hair in disarray, her eyes wet, and her cheeks flushed as she held him down by his shoulders.

“Promise me you will come back.”

“Rachel, it’s war. I can’t promise that.”

“You have never broken a promise to me. Please. I will feel better knowing you will do everything and never give up because you’ve promised you will come back to me. I don’t care if it is wrong to ask this of you. I need it. Promise me.”

He stared up at his beautiful, strong wife and wanted to believe he was coming back to her and their child. He touched her stomach and then swallowed. “I promise. I will come back to you.”

Rachel collapsed against his chest and he wrapped her up in his arms. He cried into her hair until they exhausted themselves. Shortly thereafter, Eun-Sang announced herself and Hyo-Shin entered with her. He directed some court ladies to help him dress while Eun-Sang handled Rachel. 

“I can still go with you,” Hyo-Shin said. “At least until you get to the pass and meet up with Bo-Na.”

Young-Do shook his head and squeezed his shoulder. “The Song family wants to believe you are making a baby with their daughter. You were married yesterday. My favor should keep you here. I trust you with Rachel’s safety. If you come with me to the pass, you will try to figure out a way to go the entire way. You are staying here.”

Hyo-Shin hugged him tightly before whispering fiercely, “I will never forgive you if you get yourself killed. I will never forgive myself. Come back and be king.” Then he kissed Young-Do and Young-Do kissed him back. When he pulled back, Hyo-Shin just shrugged. “We never got a goodbye kiss. I wasn’t about to let you leave without one. I don’t care about the rumors.”

Young-Do bowed his forehead down to Hyo-Shin’s. “I love you. I’m sorry for what I put you through.”

“I am, too.” They let go of each other and Young-Do avoided Rachel’s small smile. She was wearing his favorite dress of hers with peaches and teals layered together. In her hair was the binyeo he commissioned to match it. There were three blades all within her reach. He noticed that she kept the small, acupuncture needle in her hair still. 

He hoped she used it wisely.

Rachel had stopped crying the moment Eun-Sang put on her makeup and she smiled at Young-Do. “I want you to remember me this way.”

She took his hand and they walked, slowly, towards the staging area of his caravan. There was a bustle of movement as his horse and travel armor were prepared. His mothers joined him to say goodbye. It didn’t surprise him that the king didn’t bother to come. He was grateful. He didn’t want anymore threats.

He hugged Jae-Kyung and Mother tightly. He tried to smile at them. The last time he left the palace, it was to bring Rachel to their family. He went with just a bodyguard and a small contingent of soldiers that he sent to the outposts once they were in her province. This time, he couldn’t do that.

“I will be your queen mother,” she said to him softly. “You will return victorious. You always do. I love you, my son.”

“I love you, omma.”

He was about to get on his horse, when Go Nam-Il walked up to him with a young man in his wake. “This is Hyun-Shik,” he said with no preamble. “He has been trained both as a spy and as a warrior. You will take him with you in my place. He knows his duty and I trust him to watch your back. Do not duck him, Choi Young-Do.”

He rarely got his full name from Nam-Il so he nodded solemnly and then hugged him tightly. “Please protect her and my son,” he whispered. “I can’t come home if I have nothing to return to.”

“I will guard them with my life.” Then Go Nam-Il put him into his travelling armor right before Rachel hugged him tightly one last time.

“I love you. I love you. I love you.”

“I love you. I will keep my promises.” He kissed her, got on his horse, and left.

[gwynne-fics]

So...this came about in a weird way. Through a series of private conversations and public replies over the last few months, I’ve thought a lot about an alternative universe for Becoming Royals. When the request game came up, one of the people I’d spoke to privately, @jeonjuns, hungry for a secret romance, asked me if they could request two prompts based on some of the things we’d talked about. 

They caught me at just the right moment, (late at night with a low blood sugar and exhausted from kungfu ^^;;;) because I said yes, when I should’ve said no and offered them extra requests instead ^^;; 

In order for the two prompts to make sense, it will need this prologue. This is not a new story I’m starting. It will be Request Only (assuming there is any interest in it ^^;;) Becoming Royals is already a major undertaking and this is just a peek into a different way I could’ve done it.

Stolen Throne: Prologue

Rachel remembers the day her father, the king, died so vividly it gives her nightmares. She is barely eight years old and it is her birthday. Her brothers are there, teasing her before they give her gifts. Myung-Soo gives her a complicated puzzle toy and Young-Do gives her a knife concealed as a binyeo.

Father is sick so he isn’t at the party. Rachel doesn’t care. She doesn’t like Father. He is mean to her brothers. Grandfather is there and gives her a promise of a horse now that she knows how to ride. She ends up playing tag with her brothers, the game only stopping when the head physician delivers the news to Mother and the other queens. 

There is a change in the air between the queens and it turns Rachel’s stomach. “Ji-Hyuk,” Mother says her personal bodyguard, “Take Rachel to her room. You must protect her from the princes.”

Captain Kang picks her up, much to Rachel’s confusion, and obeys her mother. Her brothers might tease her but they would never hurt her. She knows that Mother is the first queen, even though she was chosen last. She knows she was supposed to be a prince but isn’t. She knows that Young-Do is supposed to be king if Father dies, unless Mother has a baby boy. She thinks all of this is true until Captain Kang locks her in her room.

Bored, she plays with her new puzzle toy until it is easy to solve. She tries reading her favorite books, until she hears a knock on her window. Rachel carefully opens it up and both Young-Do and Myung-Soo climb in.

She gives a quiet cry when she sees that their hands are bandaged. They both hug her tightly but Myung-Soo goes to the door to listen and keep watch while Young-Do explains why they are hurt.

“Queen Esther asked for a blood drop test,” he says. “To prove that we are princes. We failed. The king isn’t our father. The ministers will be here soon to do it to you, too. We have to leave the palace, Rachel.”

“No!” She wrapped her arms tightly around him and began to cry. “I can’t be king. I’m not a boy. I’m just a princess. I’ll talk to Omma! You can stay.”

“We can’t,” Myung-Soo said bitterly. He came and tried to pull her off of Young-Do. There was sounds of fighting in the hallway and once she had let go of Young-Do, he pulled out his sword. At twelve, her brothers were already on their way to becoming warriors. They were trained by their bodyguard, Go Nam-Il and Rachel is jealous no one tries to train her. “Queen Esther will have us killed if we try to stay. Our mothers are taking us into exile. We just had to say goodbye.”

“Orabeonim...” There was a crash and her brothers pushed her behind them as the door opened to reveal Go Nam-Il. Captain Kang was on the floor and Rachel could see blood. His face is screwed up in pain so it doesn’t look like he’s dead.

“No,” Myung-Soo said. “I heard Omma tell you to kill her. No.”

“She didn’t do anything wrong,” Young-Do says. “Until today, she is our little sister. We will leave with you but you can’t hurt her.”

“I would never kill the princess,” Go Nam-Il says. “She is a child. You are children. Put her in her closet and hide her there. Princess, you must stay quiet and hidden. Lee Chan-Hyuk is trying to take the throne.”

“Captain Kang is supposed to protect me.” Young-Do picks her up and Myung-Soo opens the closet. They stick her inside but she refuses to let go of Young-Do’s clothes as she starts sobbing.

“Minister Lee Chan-Hyuk’s people are trying to find you. If they kill you before you are tested and proven to be the heir, he will be able to put himself on the throne. I killed two men who had overtaken Captain Kang. He is fine and back on his feet. Boys, your mothers are waiting at the garden wall. You must go. I will protect the princess.”

“No,” Rachel cries. “Orabeonim!”

Her brothers hug her tightly. Myung-Soo leaves first but Young-Do tries to calm her down. He kisses her forehead and squeezes her fingers as he pulls her hands off of him. “You will be a good princess.”

“Come back,” she sobs. “You have to come back to me. I don’t want to be princess without you and Myung-Soo. Promise me.”

“Prince Young-Do, that isn’t wise.” Go Nam-Il says it quietly just as two soldiers burst into her room. One goes for Young-Do, the other Go Nam-Il and the two quickly dispatch them. Young-Do ends up vomiting in one of her plants. “Leave, my prince. Now!”

“Orabeoni...” She shrieks when Young-Do slams the closet doors shut and bars them with something. She starts pounding on it but she’s locked firmly inside.

“I’ll come back,” he promises. “I’ll help you be a good queen. But you have to stay quiet. Promise me, Rachel. Not a sound until it’s safe.”

“I promise.” Then he’s gone and she cries into her knees as she pulls them into her chest. She listens to the sounds of the fighting in her bedroom. It feels like hours until she hears Mother’s voice.

“Rachel? Rachel! Ji-Hyuk! Open the closet now!”

She sniffles and wipes her eyes. The room is bright when Mother pulls her out and hugs her tightly. Mother’s dress is torn and there is blood on her face. “My queen,” the old man standing next to her says, “We don’t have much time.”

He’s holding bowl with water in it. Mother takes Rachel’s hand and pricks her finger with a knife as several other ministers come into the room. Grandfather is solemn as he watches. Everyone seems to be holding their breath as the old man drops some blood out of a vial into the water and Mother squeezes Rachel’s blood into the bowl.

Rachel doesn’t understand what is going on until there is a sigh of relief. “Princess Rachel is the king’s daughter and only living heir. She will be the crown princess until she comes of age and then she will be queen. Queen Esther will be the Queen Regent and Queen Mother. Long live the Queen.”

Grandfather says it so firmly and the other men murmur their assent. Rachel looks up at her Mother to find her smirking. “Omma?” She asks it quietly. “Where are my brothers?”

“Young-Do and Myung-Soo were false princes,” Omma says as she kneels down to Rachel’s level. “They are not your brothers anymore. They are gone and not coming back. It has been a long day and you are traumatized. I want you to come sleep with me and get some rest. You are the crown princess now, the only true heir to the throne.”

“I want my brothers back. Young-Do protected me. That means he can’t be false.”

There was an uncomfortable murmur among the ministers but Mother just stood and held onto Rachel’s hand tightly. “This is why we have Queen Regents. The crown princess is tired and needs rest. She will understand your loyalty tomorrow.”

Rachel obediently follows Mother to her room and numbly let’s the court ladies fuss over her. She is cleaned and let’s Mother place her into her bed. She doesn’t chide Rachel for quietly crying. Mother strokes her hair and kisses her forehead. “It’s alright now. All the bad men have been killed. I made you safe.”

“I miss my brothers,” Rachel whispers. “When can they come home?”

“Listen to me very carefully,” Mother takes her face in her hands. “Queen Jae-Kyung and Queen Kyung-Ran were bad women who let another man into their bed who wasn’t the king. The king was not their father. They were not your brothers. That was a lie. They had to leave because they did not have royal blood. That test with your blood proves you are royal and only a royal can sit on the throne. These next few years will be hard, Rachel, but you will be the queen when you come of age. We will build a strong kingdom and our people will love you. But you have to forget about the false princes. You have to stop talking about them. You have to give up their memories. You will never see them again. Tell me you understand.”

“I understand,” Rachel lies.

Her nightmares do not.

She comes of age when she is seventeen and the marriage negotiations start. So many noble sons trying to woo her makes her restless and she sneaks out of the palace to clear her head. She’s done this enough times that her bodyguard, Lee Bo-Na, knows to be waiting for her at the crack in the garden gate.

“How many Crown Princess said in that aggravating tone do you think I’ll get if I demand to become Queen before I settle on a Prince Consort?”

Bo-Na giggles and pats her hand gently as they make their way through the busy night market. “If you did that, your mother would be very proud of you. Your grandfather would absolutely support you. Is it true that she’s allowing Lee Hyo-Shin to come out of exile?”

Rachel smiles sadly. One thing she asked for, since she couldn’t protect her brothers, was for her mother to grant mercy to the children of those that rebelled against their family that day. Lee Chan-Hyuk and his wives were executed but Lee Hyo-Shin was exiled and given a steward to watch over him.

He was her friend and she missed him. She wrote him often and he wrote her back almost as often.

“He’s on the husband list,” Rachel says and wrinkles her nose. “The Queen Regent thinks that is a good way he can repay my mercy.”

Bo-Na sighs softly and squeezes her hand. They don’t talk much as they walk through the streets before Bo-Na asks, “Is Kim Won on the list?” right before there is an upset with a cart horse a few stalls down.

Bo-Na immediately yanks her out of the way when the horse bolts down the street and pulls her into a small alley. At least, Rachel thinks it is Bo-Na until she looks up and sees...

“Orabeoni. You’re alive!” She recognizes him from the eyebrows and his eyes. His gentle, gentle eyes. Everything else is different. He towers over her, his shoulders broad and strong. There is a scar bisecting his lips and another cutting one of his eyebrows. His hands are rough as he pushes her against the building wall. Rachel stares up at Young-Do and almost starts laughing. “Are you trying to rob me?”

“Fuck.” He hisses it and his voice is so different than the child she remembers. He is very handsome, she decides, and is surprised (pleased) that his hair indicates he is still unmarried.

“Unhand her.” Bo-Na’s sword slides easily over his shoulder and kisses his throat. He stills but she can see that look, the one that all warriors get right before they’re about to rush into a fight, flash through his eyes.

“Don’t,” she whispers. “You can have my purse. You can have whatever you want from me.”

“Don’t make an offer you can’t keep, princess.” He says it darkly and it cuts into her. He lets go of her and takes several steps back. Bo-Na immediately comes between them. “The rumors are true. The princess is stupid enough to mingle with commoners. I could’ve taken you and no one would know.”

“How else will I know if my ministers are telling me the truth? This is the safest city in the kingdom. Do you live here? Is Myung-Soo with you?” His face twists angrily and she supposes he hates her now. She looks away and tries not to cry. His life must be hard if he thought to rob a seemingly helpless woman. “You kept your promise.”

Young-Do lets out a pained chuckle and shakes his head. “No. You weren’t supposed to recognize me.”

“Orabeoni--”

“I’m not your brother. Surely the queen told you that when she stole the throne from me and my mother.” It felt like he slapped her. She could barely breathe now. “My mother trusted her and she betrayed us at the first opportunity. She broke their agreement Rachel. I would be king and you would be my queen. Everyone would be safe that way and she stole it from us.”

Rachel looks away. Mother explained everything to her when she turned fourteen. That was the last time she asked about why the princes had to be false. “Is that why you’re here? To take revenge on me?”

“No.” He snarls it angrily. “This was an accident. Will you tell the queen?”

“No. I will be queen soon enough. It’s time to make my own decisions.” Her heart feels like it is melting. She takes out her purse and lets it drop to the ground. She tries to spend the tax money that makes up her allowance back in the marketplace whenever she can. His clothes say he isn’t well off. If he ignores her charity then perhaps some orphan will find it and put the money to good use. “Thank you for keeping your promise. I hope you and Myung-Soo are doing well.”

She turns to leave, Bo-Na guarding her back, and tries to maintain her composure as she walks away. She gets all the way to the palace and into her room before she sinks to her knees and cries.