#i cant wait to roll for them !!!11!1!!

[i-cant-sing]

Time Traveller AU part 12

Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here. Part 8 is here. Part 9 is here. Part 10 is here. Part 11 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!

You and Silas stared at each other.

"What do you mean "okay"?"

You nod. "Okay, I'll marry you."

He looked at you suspiciously. "Why?"

"Why not?"

"That is not an answer." He frowned, making you sigh as you turned your body to face him completely. "Look, you're going to pay me anyways right?" He nodded. "So, I need the money, and well... lets just say I have nothing else left to lose. Maybe I'm just bored."

Bored? More like pissed at the universe and I will not let it beat me to the ground anymore. I wont go out without causing chaos and maybe if someone tries to kill me again, I will perhaps consider disrupting the historical timeline to make the universe itself combust and unravel. If I'm suffering, I'm taking the universe along!

Silas gave you an incredulous look, before shrugging in defeat. "Very well, then."

"Wait-" You stop him from getting up. "Why did you choose me? Actually, why do you need a wife?"

He rolled his eyes, standing up, you following along. "Come on, Silas. Tell me. Is it cause I'm pretty? Smart-"

"You dressed as a man."

What?

"What?"

He looked down at you. "What? You didnt think I'd spot you in that poor disguise at the newspaper office that day?"

Silas saw me that day? He recognised me?

"How did you even-" He scoffed. "I'm intelligent. And I have eyes. I notice everyone and everything." He turned around and began walking away.

"Wait!" You ran after him. "That still doesnt answer my question! You're marrying me because I dressed like a man? What- you're attracted by that-"

"Stop talking." Silas cut you off abruptly. "I chose you because you work at the newspaper, not because you're a man."

"Oh. So you need someone to write out articles singing your praises?Cant you just pay someone to do that?"

He rolled his eyes. "No. I dont need someone to sing my praises. I need you to be the mole there. I want you to report everything that happens at the paper, specifically about the murders thats been on going these days."

Murders? Murders-

"The White Chapel murders?" He nodded. "I need the papers to focus on them, not on me or who I am marrying. I need them to put the pressure on the cops to catch that sick bastard! Not idolise him with that stupid alias-"

"Jack the Ripper." You finish for him. He breathes heavily, anger radiating off him. "Yes, that. Because its only causing people to either admire him for killing off those prostitutes or fear him, letting the idea of them terrorise them!"

"I see. But... why do you need to get married to me for that? I mean, if you pay me, I could just report to you everything from there, including his letters."

Silas looked at you in slight annoyance, as if mad that you couldnt figure out his motives.

"The papers are focusing on me and my marriage. If I get married, the news will only run for a week or two before diverting their attention to the papers. And before you ask why I'm marrying you specifically instead of someone much better suited to my tastes-" okay, not gonna take that insult to heart. "- I told you, you work at the paper, which means you'll report everything to me. And if I were to marry someone more influential, the papers will continue to write about us for longer. But you? You're a nobody- believe me, I checked. You have no family, dont come from nobility, so no one will talk about you. "

Great. "Wow, you do know how to flatter a woman."

Silas smirked. "Trust me, "a woman" would be flattered-" You shot him a glare before he could finish off his joke.

-

Silas and you got married later that night. He arranged an out-of-town priest, some official documents, and two witnesses for the vows, which were his butler Cadbury and his wife, Erin, who acted as the best man and maid-of-honor. It was obvious that Silas wanted to keep this ceremony a secret, and he told you that the time will come to break the news.

When the priest asked him to kiss you, SIias pulled a face and said to skip over that part because you had bad breath. You did not. Jerk.

But you were glad you didnt had to kiss him, so you didnt bother kicking his shin. Maybe nearly dying so many times has made you grow a pair, or maybe its the fact that you dont actually consider this a real marriage because a Nikkah (an Islamic wedding) ceremony did not happen, so technically, you're still single, but you're surprised at how... calmly you've come to terms with everything.

Silas let you go back to you house, because the marriage was the still a secret so there's no use keeping you around at his place. Besides, he needs you to continue working on the murders.

Honestly, you do kind of want to find out who Jack the Ripper is. Any historian worth his salt, dreams of this very opportunity you've been given- to find out the man behind all the horrendous, gut wrenching murders.

Colin watched you get up from your desk and go to the corner office where Will was working on the murders. Poor Will. Colin pitied the lad- he had to deal with the gruesome details of the murders, write out the articles in details that are just pallatable enough for the readers, only to be rejected by the editor who wanted the front page news to be about Silas FitzGeorge.

What were you doing there? Colin didnt think it was best for you to go in there, after the depressing weeks you'd barely pulled yourself through. Grisly details of a killing spree might not be what you need at the moment.

"Hey Will!" You walk in his office, changing your voice to that of a man.

"Holmes." He acknowledged you briefly, his hair a mess as well his desk. If anyone knew how giddy you were everytime someone in the office called you Sherlock Holmes, you'd be labelled a loser for sure.

"Still working on those murders, eh?" You walk closer to his desk. "Any leads on who the mystery man might be?"

"No." He glared at you. "I would, if the coppers were to do their job and the editor published my work, but noooo. God forbid we miss any details on that FitzGeorge fella and his tragic life. Cry me a fucking river-" Ah, a fellow Silas hater. You can work with that.

"Let me help you." You offer him. Will raises his brow, before scoffing. "Unless you can somehow have the editor publish my articles, I dont think you can help me. Besides, I dont need an amateur disturbing me because he's just wants to see a dead body."

Amateur? Pfft, I'll have you know I was a minor celebrity on Wattpad at just age 11 when I wrote Sherlock Holmes fanfics-

"How about this? If I can convince the editor to post your work, will you let me help?"

Will stares at you, studying you for a moment.

"Fine."

You walk out of his office and go to your desk where Colin is already waiting for you.

"Hey, Colin." You greet him, sitting down as you pull a blank sheet of paper from your drawer and start writing on it.

"Hey... Sherlock. What were you doing in-" He leans down to read what you're writing. "Jack The Ripper- why are you writing about him?"

You shrug. "Why not? He's an important figure to talk about and needs to be caught. If the papers bring enough attention to him, it'll put pressure on the authorities to work harder to catch him."

"I get that, but- I mean, you already have the FitzGeorges to write about and what about other douches in high society?" Colin tried to persuade you.

"I'll write about them too, in fact. Dont worry about it. I'm going to bring you some real dirt soon." You tell him before picking up the pen again, but Colin grasps your wrist, stopping you.

"Y/n, I just dont think that you should be working on this right now-"

"Colin." You cut him off, freeing your wrist. "I'm grateful for your concern for my well being, but I assure you- I am not made of glass. I can handle my business. Besides, this is something that has intrigued me. Let me work on it, please." You say before returning to writing down your points on the homicidal maniac.

-

After work, you changed out of your disguise and went to the antique store on Regent street, or what was left of it.

You knew there was no chance, but something inside you hoped that your time machine had survived.

The store was burnt down, and since the interior was mainly made of wood, most of the antiques had burnt to ashes or at least, damaged beyond repair and could not be sold.

You stood outside the ruins off the store, the property was sealed off and guards stood outside it, not letting you in.

"Please, I just need to-"

"Like I said, miss. We were given specific instructions not to let anyone in." The guard cut you off, annoyed by your insistence.

Before you could argue again, someone walked up behind you.

"Y/n." Henry looked at you. He was dressed well, his hair combed and face shaved, well kept as he usually was but his eyes.... he had bags under his eyes. Like he hadnt slept in days.

"What are you doing here?"

"Oh, um- I just wanted to see if my stuff is still there."

He nodded at his guards to step aside, leading you inside the shop.

"Look around. See if you can find it." Henry's tone was flat, as if he already knew.

Still, you looked around. You searched the whole place, not even finding the remains off your machine. And how could you? It was made of mostly plastic and very cheap metal, its not like you had funds to make it indestructible.

Or incombustible.

"Satisfied?" He asked you when you finally stopped looking for it.

You huff. "If you'd just given it to me before-"

"Y/n." He cut you off. "I lost my store. I lost my employee who was working in here, who was blasted to pieces. I lost more money than you can ever imagine and you have the nerve to stand there and try to blame it on me? After I'd given you the courtesy to look through my property to put your mind to ease?"

He admonished you, all while barely letting his rage slip through his voice. He was holding back from blowing up on you, but it did not help because you still felt small.

Because he is right. He lost an employee. He lost money. He lost too, and yet you have the audacity to complain to him like he was somehow at fault.

And he wasnt. Its not like he bombed his store.

"Do you know who did it?" You ask, diverting your eyes to avoid his piercing gaze.

"No one "did" it. It was an accident." Henry looked at the floorboard. "Apparently, there was gunpowder in some of the artefacts that came from China that day. The employee probably didnt check it when he put it on the table, next to a candle. Then one got lit up and it set off all the others, blowing up the whole store."

That... sounds like a big coincidence.

"Henry, are you sure someone wasnt behind this-"

"Y/n, I dont have time to entertain your wild theories right now. I have to deal with insurance and other things. Please leave." He cut you off abruptly.

Without giving him another moment to bruise your self esteem, you stormed out of his store. By the time you reached home, it was dark, which wasnt the best idea with a murderer on the loose- as the boys made it clear.

"Do you have any idea what he's capable of?! Have you seen the crime scenes?!" Liam yelled at you.

"No. But its not like I'm a prostitute, so he wont hurt me." You answer from your seat between Benjamin's legs, who insisted on brushing the knots out of your hair and placing some essential oils in your hair.

Liam looked at you like you'd grown two heads. "How would he know that?!"

You leaned forward, frowning. "Okay if you're saying that you cant the difference between a prostitute and me, then thats just insulting to me and to you as a police officer!"

Shepherd suppressed a chuckle as he handed a drink to Liam to calm him down. As they continued to joke around, you mind went to your time machine.

Sure, you could try making it from scratch again. It'll be difficult, and not just because there isnt enough technology to make the whole thing by yourself, but also because the mere idea of building a time machine could have you lobotomised.

So yes, one of the reasons why you agreed to marry Silas was because of his money that would not only let you buy expensive raw materials but also allow you to have a space to make the machine in secret.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Colin left to see who it was, returning moments later with a huge box in his hand.

"Its for you." He set the box down and handed you the letter that came with it. You read the letter while the boys opened the box-

"Tomorrow. 7:30 pm sharp.

Dont be late, missus."

The "missus" part gave away that it was from Silas. What was he planning? Were you supposed to go to his place or was he going to pick you up? What was going to happen tomorrow?

"Woah! Who is this from?" Shepherd asked as he looked at the fancy dress in the box. He pulled it out of the box, the gown flowing down effortlessly. "It looks expensive- this is expensive, right? Its expensive." He stated before repeating his question to you. "Who is it from, Y/n?"

You folded the letter as you saw them all looking at you. "I... I might have a date-"

"With who?" Benjamin asked sharply.

"I-" You sigh. "I'll let you know after the date. Lets see how it goes first."

"Oh, come on! Just tell us!" Liam probed, but you took the dress from him, putting it back in the box and taking it to your room, not noticing how silent Colin had went.

-

You stood in front of the mirror, looking at your reflection while Ben did your hair. Wearing the black velvet gown that had a white blouse and long skirt underneath, puffy regency era sleeves and a belt at the bust, you looked elegant.

Seeing as you had no jewellery to pair the outfit with, Ben styled your hair down, curling the locks and putting a dainty black silk bow on the back, trimming the front of your hair so that they framed your face.

"There's a carriage waiting for you!" Shepherd informed you before going back to gushing about the rich fella you'd managed to bag.

You turned around for Ben for the finishing touches. He smiled softly at you, taking your hands in his and squeezed them gently.

"Dont force yourself to do anything you're not comfortable with, hm? Just because he gave you this dress doesnt mean he can do anything he wishes." You nodded, returning his smile. "And remember, you have me and the boys to beat anyone who upsets you, Y/n." He winked making you giggle.

Standing outside the carriage, you looked up and waved to the 3 boys standing in the window before getting inside.

"Ah, I hope she knows how to use that knife I gave her." Liam mumbled, making Shepherd yell at him.

"You gave her a knife?!"

"What? She needs to protect herself when there's a murderer on the lose-"

As the two continued to bicker, Benjamin went to his room and packed some scissors and razors in a small bag, before leaving the room.

"Where are you going?" Colin asked, finally speaking for the first time that evening. Sitting on the sofa chair, he'd been nursing on a drink the entire time you were getting ready for your drink. He kept quiet, pretending to be to engrossed with reading the paper to notice you getting dressed for your date night.

"I... have a client." Ben said, putting on his top hat and leather gloves before wearing his coat.

"This late?" Colin raised a brow.

Ben gave a nod.

"He... he needs a haircut urgently."

Colin stared at him before sighing, picking up his drink.

"Alright. Be careful. Its foggy out there."

-

Sitting inside the carriage alone, you wondered where the buttler was taking you. Since Silas isnt here with you, then its likely that you're being taken to him at the FitzGeorge estate.

You take a deep breath, fiddling with the velvet of your dress. So tonight will be the night he announces his marriage to you. Or maybe not. I mean, if he did plan on doing that then perhaps he'd be giving you some pointers on how to win over his family? To get their approval? It was a big thing for high society, if not for someone who is loosely attached to royalty.

Maybe thats why he called you over tonight. To soft launch you to his family, something like- "hey, this is Y/n, a girl I fancy. I think she might be the one." so that it seems a lot more believable when he does introduce himself as your husband, probably a few weeks or a month from now.

Yes. Silas doesnt seem like the type to just spring up the union on his family out of nowhere. He is English, he is noble, he wouldnt be one to cause a scene.

The carriage stopped after sometime, and you could hear people chattering outside. Your door suddenly opened, but before you could step out, someone stepped in.

It was Silas.

He sat across from you, wearing a formal dress black suit, his hair styled properly. If your dressing didnt give it away, then his did- it was definitely a black-tie event.

He gave you a nod of acknowledgement, looking you up and down.

"Here, wear this." He handed you a velvet lined box. Opening it, you saw a beautiful pearl necklace and matching tear drop earrings.

"Oh, this is... beautiful." You said in awe. "You could've sent this along with the dress, I would've worn my hair differently-"

"No, I didnt want to risk you running off with it." Silas casually insulted you as he began opening the door. "Wear this and dont talk to me or approach me in there."

"Wait, what?" You looked at him confusion.

Silas huffed in irritation. "I'm going to go back inside. You'll walk in after five minutes, and when you do, you will not talk to me, or approach me or do anything that gives away that you know me."

"Silas-" But he left before you could question what he was on about.

So... he wasnt planning on announcing his marriage to you tonight? Wearing the jewellery, you followed his instructions and exited the carriage exactly five minutes later.

But instead of seeing the FitzGeorge house, you were standing in front of a... palace.

A palace you're seen quite a few times.

Buckingham palace.

"What am I...?" You whispered to yourself before composing yourself as other guests began walking past you.

As you ascended the stairs to the entrance where guards stood, you wondered if they'd let you in. Surely, without Silas by your side or an official invitation, they wouldnt let you in. You watched a few guests holding an envelope with a royal seal, an invitation they showed to the guards before being let in.

Heart pounding as you feared the embarrassment you're about to face, you reached the guards who looked at you for a few moments, trying to recognise you before their eyes fell on your necklace and they let you pass.

Ah, so thats why he gave you the jewellery. If you looked like you belonged there, then you probably did.

Why am I here though?

You looked around and saw many people inside, all belonging from high society. This definitely wasnt the place where Silas was going to announce his marriage. So why did he invite you here?

Maybe he wants me to use this as an opportunity to get dirt on high society?

Yes, perhaps, but how would this serve him? Is there a specific person he wants me to get dirt on? Someone I need to write about in the papers?

Silas, what game are you playing?

You spotted him standing in the corner, talking with his cousins and uncles, though you noticed many girls looking at him. Of course, he still is the "most eligible bachelor" to them. If they knew how rude he was, maybe they'd change their opinion.

Walking through the crowd, you began listening on conversations, trying to pick up on interesting bits. It was the usual obnoxious bragging about their wealth, some scandals here and there, disturbing comments about women, etc. Nothing particularly interesting.

Fortunately, you werent bored for long as the royal butler announced the arrival of the hosts. It hadnt truly hit you where you were standing until you heard her name-

"Her Majesty, Queen Victoria-"

Queen Victoria. The Queen Victoria.

You could feel goosebumps raising on your skin, your eyes widening as you realised you're looking at one of the most iconic figures in history. Alive. She's alive and she's walking right in front of you-

She's short. They were right about that. Standing next to her husband, Prince Albert, she looked even shorter. But she looked incredibly happy, full of youth as she stood next to him, unlike all the paintings who depicted her as this angry old widow.

She looked absolutely beautiful.

Her children stood behind her in order, all smiling at their mother. Her daughters, you recognised them all, looked just as beautiful. You recognised her eldest, Edward VII, a 20-something old boy who would end up being hated by his mother and blamed for his father's death. He looked nervous, standing beside her and you could see he was just itching to leave her side and avoid any more scrutiny.

The Queen began speaking.

"Thank you everyone for joining us on this pleasent occasion." She looked around. "Tonight, we are going to welcome a member to our family, even though he has always been a part of us. But now, we will make things official."

"Silas FitzGeorge." She called suddenly. You saw Silas step forward in front of the queen, bowing his head curtly before looking at her confidently.

"You're my cousin Georgie's grandson, and I have no doubt when I say that if he were here tonight, he'd be just as proud of the young man you've become as I am. Our families may have had some issues in the past, but I have always accepted you as a part of me. Over the years, you've only proven me right with how capable you've become on your own, without seeking a helping hand in your adversities. You have made us all immensely proud, as well as your predecessors for being the first man in our family to attend Oxford university. Watching you start businesses and expand your empire, I have no doubt that you will only continue to make the royal family and Britian proud. Therefore, I would like to offer my support and make good on my promise that I made to you when you were a child."

She turned around and a servant handed her a document.

"I hereby make Silas FitzGeorge, the Duke of Westminster."

Oh. Ohhhhh. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh-

This was Silas's dukedom ceremony. Why is this a huge deal? Because his grandfather, Prince George was once estranged from the royal family and stripped off his royal duties and benefits when he married Sarah Fairbrother, which meant their descendents were all illegitimate and not recognised by the crown.

But tonight, with Silas becoming a duke, its like a welcome back to the family. That too, by the same woman who had in essence- ostracised his family.

And with Dukedom comes other benefits, money, property, influence. Not to mention that Silas has become the duke of Westminster, as in THE WESTMINSTER! One of the wealthiest dukedoms to get, and also where Westminster palace is, the place which is the meeting place for the Parliament of United Kingdom. It'll allows Silas to have a say and play around with politics.

This is a huge gesture by the queen, and if Silas wasnt the most eligible bachelor before, then he definitely is one.

You watched the queen sign the documents first, before giving it to Silas who signed it. Everyone cheered and clapped for the young duke before stopping as Victoria began speaking again.

"Now, I would like to share more good news." She smiled at Silas, who stood beside her now. "I would like to announce the new duke's betrothal to my daughter, Helena."

What?

The guests clapped again as you saw Silas looking ahead, purposely avoiding your gaze. The queen beamed as she looked back at Helena, who was blushing.

So this is why Silas didnt want you to talking to him. He knew he was going to marry Helena, and he didnt want anyone to even doubt that he's associated with you in any way. Is this his way of telling you that the sham marriage between you two has ended?

Victoria encouraged Silas to say a few words.

Silas looked down briefly, a small smile playing on his lips. "Oh, wow. I am grateful that her majesty has awarded me dukedom. I dont have enough words to express how thankful I am to you." He looked up and you saw a mischievous glint in his eyes. "However, I was only informed of this ceremony and not of my betrothal beforehand."

The queen's head snapped in his direction, as did all of the royals, but Silas continued speaking unfazed.

"I wish I had been told about this earlier to avoid this awkward situation uhhh..." he chuckled nervously, but you could see he was anything but nervous. "I am honoured to be even considered for the princess's hand, your majesty, but I'm afraid I am already married." He announced, looking straight at you.

The hall interrupted into gasps and whispers before they parted the way to let Silas make his walk to you.

With a charming smile, a dimple on his left cheek, he approached you, pulling you into his arms as he leaned down to press a kiss to your temple.

"Hi, sweetheart." He whispered loud enough for the onlookers to hear. Your eyes widened, your face flushed at the feeling of everyone's eyes and at his word.

"Si-" The words died down your throat as he placed an arm around your back and pulled you close to his side, showing you off.

"This is Y/n, my darling wife."

With Silas's announcement, the hall went silent once again. Your throat went dry at being put in the spotlight, and your eyes flickered from one guest to another, until finally falling on the queen's, who looked... pissed.

Finally, it was Prince Albert who broke the silence and announced dinner had been served. As the guests began walking out of the hall, Silas lead you out of the palace and to the carriage where his grandmother was waiting for you.

"Go home, now. I'll see you soon." Was all Silas said to you before whispering something to his grandmother, who beamed and nodded, patting his cheek.

"Come on, Y/n. Its getting late, now." Sarah said as she lead you into the carriage, taking her seat next to you, completely unaware of the eyes that had been following you since the moment you'd left home.

-

Silas returned inside, seeing his uncles smirking with pride at the game he'd just played but instead of going to them to celebrate his victory, he went to Prince Albert and Queen Victoria who seemed to be arguing in a low tone in the corner while the guests were being seated in the dining hall.

Clearing his throat, he got their attention.

"Your majesties, I am so sorry for not informing you about my union with Y/n. Its just my wife is terribly shy and we wanted to keep this marriage a secret. But I understand how this creates an embarrassing situation for the crown, and I would like to humbly turn down my dukedom-"

"No." The queen cut him off, her eyes void of any emotion. "The dukedom was awarded to you for your achievements, not because you were asked to marry my daughter. Helena is not something to pawn off to just anyone."

Silas offered a sympathetic smile. "Of course, your majesty. I'm sure you'll find a better suitor for the princess." He took his bow before turning around to enter the dining hall while Victoria stared at his back.

"Are you really still going to keep him as the duke of Westminster?" Albert asked his wife.

She was fuming. But only Albert could tell.

"What choice did I have?" Victoria asked, still glaring at the young boy who dared to play her. "If I took the dukedom away after announcing it publicly, it would've been a far more embarrassment for the crown. They would call us "cheap"."

"We cant let him get away with it." Albert whispered. "Its Westminster. We may rule it, but the duke will still be able to influence the government."

"You think I'm not aware he wants to play politics?" Victoria snapped, before softening her tone. "I wont let him get away with it, Albert. He's just a boy. I am a queen. I wont let him or anyone humiliate us."

Silas sat down besides his cousins as his uncles raised their glasses to him. He sipped his drink, a satisfied grin resting on his face. He knew exactly what he did. Even though no one actually told him that the dukedom came with marriage to the princess, because how callous would it be to ask him to marry her when no one would give up the opportunity of becoming the queen's son-in-law, Silas knew he was expected to marry Helena.

But no one said it. No one asked him. Its the English, they never say what they mean outright, choosing to read between the lines and do what is expected of them, because its more artful, more honourable this way.

Not that Silas could care about traditions. Why would he, when he planned on exacting his revenge?

The queen only came to offer her support when he became successful enough on his own. Where was she when his parents died and his sister was left to take care of him? Sure, Victoria attended the funeral and "promised" to take care of him. But she also said she'd only do that if he proved himself. His grandmother and his sister, Daisy were the ones who raised him.

And now, years later when he got into Oxford without using his family name, without saying "I am related to the queen", when he used his skills to create a powerful business empire that has the potential to influence the British industries, she wants him?

Sure, Westminster has its benefits, but Silas doesnt need Westminster. Westminster needs Silas. He could topple over the government and even shut down Britain herself with just his influence alone. Being a duke just has given him a public platform, an acknowledgement and most importantly, backing from the crown.

And you? Marrying you wasnt just because you happened to be around. Oh no. Silas has plans for you, plans to use you and further his revenge. This is just the beginning.

-

Sarah dropped you back at your place after you insisted that you needed to inform your flatmates of your departure. She gave you a disapproving look when she found out you were living with 4 men and was very determined to have you move in with her and Silas at the FitzGeorge estate, but you were able to persuade her to let you stay the night at home one last time.

"There's something I need to tell you guys." You fiddled with your thumbs as they all sat down in front of you.

"I um... I'm married."

"What?" Shepherd asked. "And you still went on a date?"

"I went on a date with my husband-"

"And who is that?"

You took a deep breath.

"Silas FitzGeorge."

Everyone except for Benjamin broke into laughter.

"Yeah, good one. Seriously, who is it?"

You frowned. "Seriously. Its Silas FitzGeorge."

As you began explaining your situation, even showing them the jewellery that you definitely werent wearing before you left, they started to believe you.

"Y/n- you cant- you cant marry Silas. You cant just marry someone you barely know!" Colin argued.

"What? Havent you heard of "love at first sight"?" You ask but he was unamused. Sighing, you shrugged. "Look, its a marriage that will benefit us both mutually. He gets people nagging him to get married off his back and I get to use his money and influence to get dirt on high society! Besides, I can leave him anytime I want."

"Then leave him now, before its too late." Ben said, standing up as he approached you. He took your shoulders and gave them a firm squeeze. "If its money you're worried about, I'll help you. I can provide for you, Y/n. Dont get into bed with these rich bastards, you dont know how selfish they can be. I- I- dont want you to get hurt-"

"I wont, Benny." You grab his arms, assuring him. "Silas and I are working together. If I go down, so will he. He wont hurt me, he cant. Its too risky for him now, you know? He announced our marriage tonight in front of the queen!"

As you began telling him about how you met the queen and all, Colin quietly left the living room to pour himself another drink, something to knock his brain out so he doesnt have to think about you and Silas.

-

Next day, before the sun even rose, you had packed up a few of your things to go live with the FitzGeorges. All the boys were awake at that time, though Colin's eyes were bloodshot from apparently drinking the wrong liqour, so he sat quietly on the sofa, watching you.

Liam and Shepherd took your bags to put it in the carriage waiting outside, while Ben pulled you in for a hug.

"I'm just moving out, Benny! I'll still see you guys." You laugh, patting his back.

Ben kissed the crown of your head before tucking it under his chin, arms tightening around you. "Just know that you will always have a home here, with us. Dont hesitate to reach out for help. And if Silas or anyone every hurts you, I dont care how rich they are, Y/n. I will take care of them. You just- just come back to us, hm?"

You pulled away from him, wiping a lone tear from your eye. "You're the best, Benny." You whisper before going to Colin, who just stared at you with red eyes.

Leaning down, you poked his cheek. "Kinda wish you werent drunk when I said goodbye, but I guess it makes it easier." Colin continued to stare at you. You grabbed his hand, smiling gratefully at him. "Thank you for everything, Colin. You saved me. Truly." You gave his hand a firm squeeze before leaving, missing him mumble something under his breath.

The carriage took you to the FitzGeorge estate and you were a little disappointed to see only Sarah waiting to welcome you. Its not like you wanted Silas to make a grand gesture to welcome his bride, but you were kinda hoping he was going to ease you into his world while explaining the events of the previous night.

Sarah showed you around the house before leading you to Silas bedroom.

"Cadbury has already placed your bags in there." She turned to you. "This will be your space too, so do make changes to the place as you please."

You smiled shyly at her. Honestly, you dont know whether Sarah knows that Silas only married you for personal agenda, but she wasnt surprised when Silas announced you were his wife.

Sarah looked at you and she placed a hand on her chest, touched.

"Oh, I am so glad you're Silas's girl."

Silas's girl?

"When Silas told me he married you, I was only mad that he did it behind my back! But I suppose it is understandable... these FitzGeorge men always liked to make a statement when it came to love." Sarah said, fondly remembering her late husband.

Sarah continued to gush about you enough for you to know that you dont need to kiss her ass. You have her approval.

When she left, you looked around the large bedroom, Victorian and dark academia was the aesthetic. Wooden panels lined the room, the shelves were stocked with thick books, a study table in one corner, an ottoman chest seat in front of the bed. The entire room was illuminated by the large windows that opened into the balcony, overlooking the large gardens and the cold air of London.

Standing at his balcony, you couldnt help but wonder...

Silas definitely has to HAVE a mega douchebag personality if this was where he was raised.

I mean who wouldnt have an ego trip if they woke up to a view like this, a butler named CADBURY who probably brings him his bland tea and tells him about all the proposals he had, and Silas would just wave a hand in dismissal, telling his butler to reject them all on his behalf.

Silas lived like a king. Or at the very least, lived like the 1% of Britain.

Returning back into the room, you looked at the interior before a grin formed on your face.

Time to snoop around, Y/n. You made your way to his desk.

Lets see what secrets you're hiding, husband.

-

Silas walked in on you folding your clothes and placing them in his closet.

"What do you think you're doing?" He huffed, loosening his tie. He was still in his clothes from last night, having just returned home after celebrating with his uncles and cousins.

You turned to him, faking enthusiasm. "Hello to you too."

Silas rolled his eyes, sitting on his bed. "Dont touch my things." He began untying his shoes.

"Why? You worried my poverty would taint them?"

He looked you dead in the eyes.

"Yes."

"Haha." You close the closet and turn to him. "We need to talk."

He looked at you miserably. "Cant it wait-" "No."

"Fine, then. Go on, I'm listening." He leaned against the headboard while you took your place on the foot of the bed.

"Why didn't you tell me last night that we were going to the palace? Or that you were going to announce our marriage?"

Tired eyes looked at you. "I didnt want to risk you getting cold feet."

Okay. Fair enough.

You gave him a nod. "Fine. Still would've liked a heads-up." "I'll keep that in mind for next time. Good night-" He began closing his eyes when you spoke again.

"No. We still need to talk about our situation." You looked at your lap, smoothing your dress before looking at him again, only to find his tired eyes studying you.

"Silas, who knows that our marriage is not... real?"

"It is a real marriage. We signed proper documents and all." He told you. "What you mean to ask is who knows our marriage is like mutually beneficial business deal? The answer is- no one, except for my butler and his wife, who wont say a word. And I want it to stay that way."

You raised a brow. "So... what exactly is the image you're trying to sell to the world? That we're a young couple, madly in love?"

He shrugged. "Sure."

"Silas." Your tone turned serious. "If you want people to believe this fairytale you're creating, then you need to get your stories straight. And involve me in it too!"

He tilted his head at you before sighing. "Fine. Lets say... we met two months ago."

"Where?"

He grinned. "Ballet theatre. Near Oxford university."

"Ballet theatre- are you trying to use your grandparents story?"

He shrugged. "So what if I am? Besides, people will love it."

You glared at him, but he continued on with his story. "So we met at the ballet theatre, you fell madly in love with me the first time you saw me. Your exact words were- "Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father, have I died and went to heaven to witness the utter beauty of an angel-"

"I have seen rodents looking better than you." You cut him off.

"You're ruining my story." He scolded you. "Fine, we can say that after you were mesmerised by my beauty, you stalked me for a few weeks until I finally said yes out of pity-"

"Silas."

He raised his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. I'll leave the details to you, just remember- we met at the theatre. Thats the most important part of the story."

"Okay, I'll add my version of the events, which you can read in the papers in a day or two." You stood up, walking over to the vanity. "I will be going to work from tomorrow. I'll tell your grandmother I'm going to visit some friends, and you'll drop me off at my old place where I'll change my clothes and then I'll go to the office."

"Very well." He turned his head to look at you. "But after you're done writing about us, continue working on the White Chapel murders."

You hummed, turning around. "Dont worry, I should be able to get access to the letters in a few days. Wait- Silas, didnt you say your friend owned the paper I worked for?" He nodded. "Well, can you ask him if he could let me, I mean- assign Sherlock Holmes to work on the case? You could bribe him with giving an exclusive interview about your marriage for the papers, in return, he has to let me work the murder story."

"Consider it done." Silas said, putting his arm over his eyes.

"Um, Silas?"

"What?" He asked, annoyed.

"Where am I to sleep?" With Sarah in the house, its not like you can occupy another room. It'll raise suspicion.

Silas removed his arm to look at you, before looking at his large bed.

You shake your head. "I am not sleeping in the same bed with you-"

"I wouldnt want that either." He said, grabbing a pillow. Your heart warmed at the gesture. He really was going to leave his bed for you, like the true gentleman-

Thud.

You looked at the pillow he'd thrown on the floor.

"There." He pointed before returning to bed.

"You want me to sleep on the floor?"

With his eyes closed, he replied. "You say that like you expected me to sleep on the floor."

"Well-"

"Its my room, my bed. Why would I sleep on the floor?"

"I dont know, whats the word- chivalry?!" You huffed, grabbing the pillow and walking near the closed balcony window. It was cold but you'd rather sleep with a pretty view than to wake up to Silas feet landing on your face.

Muttering curses under your breath, you soon fell asleep with your back turned to Silas. A few minutes later, he got off the bed and dropped a blanket on your sleeping body.

And they say chivalry is dead. He thought to himself, returning to his bed.

-

The next day, while dropping you off to work, you brought up the previous day's convo.

"I need something." Silas's gaze flickered from the window of the carriage to you. "What do you know about Henry Blackwood?"

Silas' looked bored again. "He's a fellow businessman, invests in people rather than companies, likes to keep his operations in the dark, which means he has secrets. His shop blew up some time ago, allegedly a "technical failure" but... I think someone did it."

"You think so too?" You asked, hopeful. "Do you know who?"

Silas shook his head. "No. His enemies, like his operations are secret. All I know is someone did it to send a message to him, blew up the shop deliberately while he was out."

A message?

"I want to get dirt on him." You watch Silas raise a brow at you. "Just... get me close to him, or to his people. I saw him talking to your uncles, maybe they know something?"

Silas shakes his head again. "My uncles talk to anyone who has money. Henry wouldnt ever invest in them, they couldnt manage a business for the life of them."

"And you? Would Henry invest in you?"

Silas nodded. "He's tried. I wasnt interested." He cut you off before you could even suggest the idea. "And I'm still not interested. But I'll get you close to him."

"Thank you." You settled back in your seat before remembering another request. "Silas?"

"What now?"

"Can I have some money?"

"Here's a pound-" You glared at him, making him sigh. "How much?"

"Mmhm, oh I dont know... just enough to buy a small house-"

"And why do you need a house?"

You looked at him dumbfounded. "Well, when our marriage goes to the sewers, I would like to have a roof over my head."

"And what if I say I dont intend on ending this marriage?" Your blood ran cold at his words.

"What?"

Silas tilted his head at you before chuckling. "Why have you turned pale? If anyone should be horrified at the prospect of staying married in this mismatch, completely unbalanced relationship, it should be me. Struck down, caught out of the lake in his prime, of both beauty and brain-"

"Oh God, please stop talking before blood starts pouring out of my ears."

"So you agree your voice is irritating enough to do that?" Silas remarked smirking.

"Shut up." You flared your nostrils at him. Why does he have to ruin my mood this early in the day?

He chuckled victoriously, looking out the window. "I'll get you the house. You dont need money for it." He looked at you, already knowing you'd be confused. He grinned, pointing to himself. "Duke of Westminster-" he then points at you. "Duchess of Westminster."

Of course. Now that you're married to the duke, you have a whole lot of land in your hands. You really can have a house anywhere you'd like.

The carriage stopped. "Off you go now, wife."

Entering the office, you were first greeted by Will, the man in charge on working on the White Chapel murders.

"Holmes! How did you do it?" He shook you by the shoulder gleefully. "How did you convince the boss to post my story next?!"

I married his friend. "Oh, I just... promised him an article. Once I give him that, we can work together on the murder story."

He nodded, ushering you to finish off your article first before helping him.

Making your way to your desk, you spotted Colin. "Hey, Colin-" But he walked right past you, as if he didnt hear you.

Maybe he didnt. You shrugged, sitting down at your desk as you began writing down the news about you and Silas.

-

"Oh, Mr Holmes has definitely written most accurately about you Y/n!" Sarah said as she read the papers at the breakfast table. "He calls you the "fairest maiden in town" and "beauty with brains"- oh, I couldnt agree more!"

You smiled, sipping your tea sheepishly while Silas rolled his eyes. Its been 3 days since you wrote an article announcing your marriage to the world, and the editor decided to post it on Sunday, when you and most of London had off from work, all tuning in to read "how the most eligible bachelor bagged the fairest maiden in town."

Sarah ate some of the dishes you'd prepared today. "These are absolutely delicious, Y/n! Silas, your wife-" A maid came in to inform her that there's someone at the door to meet her. As Sarah excused herself, you got up from your seat to serve Silas the food you'd made on Sarah's request.

Silas picked up his fork and took a bite, a smile forming on his lips.

"Have I ever told you how good of a cook you are?"

You blushed, looking down. "No-"

"Then why do you keep cooking?" He dropped his fork on the plate, pushing it aside. "Stop using my kitchen." He smirked as he drank his tea, watching rage take over your face.

"Listen you twat-"

Sarah came back rushing in, a worried look on her face. Silas immediately sat up. "What is it, nana?"

"The- there was someone here from the palace." She gulped. "They sent flowers and a letter congratulating you two on the marriage. They... they said they'd like to meet Y/n and- and welcome the new couple officially."

Silas understood Sarah's worry. The palace never writes to them. In fact, the last time they did, it was years ago when his parents had died.

Getting up from his seat, Silas wiped his face with a napkin before dropping it on the table. "Then we'll let them. We shall host the Queen."

"Si-" But he took her by the shoulders, easing Sarah's worry.

"Dont worry. This is our home, nana." We have the advantage.

Silas left to start making arrangements for hosting the queen at the estate, while Sarah ran around the house with the staff to prepare for the event that is a week from now. Seeing as you couldnt be of use there and everyone was too busy to give you any pointers on what to say or act when the queen arrives, you left the estate to explore the town. Or more specifically, return to the blown up vintage store.

Yep, you're still hoping your time machine survived.

When you arrived on Regent street, you saw the same men still guarding the store, so they probably still wouldn't have let you in. But you also saw Henry, who was leaving the store and in his carriage.

Deciding to follow him, you sneaked into the back of someone's carriage and rode it before jumping off it when it got near Henry's carriage. Fortunately, you didnt have to follow him for long as he got off on Piccadilly street soon and strolled into a place called "The Gentlemen's Club" and from the looks of the daunting bouncers standing outside, you knew you couldnt just stroll in like Henry.

You watched the people who seemed to walk into the club, mostly men, all dressed formally and looked like they were a part of the high society. You saw some women too, though most of them dressed scandalously, so you assume they were there to provide entertainment.

As the sun began setting, more and more people started entering the club and just when you were about to leave, you saw Henry walk out of the club, a frown settled on his face. You werent expecting him to leave the club so soon, not when more people had started going in there, to rave or whatever. If Henry was here for pleasure, then he came out too early. If he was here for business, then most of the club goers have just begun entering, which means that whoever he wanted to conduct business with was already in there. Someone who works at the club... maybe even owns it?

As you turned to leave, you felt someone bump into you.

"Watch where you're going!" The blonde haired woman shrieked at you before crossing the street to go to the club.

You huffed. Everyone's got a giant stick up their-

You whipped your head around, feeling someone watching you. And thats when you spot it- a shadowy figure of a man, standing in the window of the club, on the second floor. Henry? No, he left. Then...?

The shadow didnt move, staring at you until it creeped you enough to make you leave.

-

Silas finally sat down after working all day. Cadbury brought him his evening tea.

"How are the preparations coming along?" He asked his butler. Cadbury informed him of the arrangements he's made and the guest list he's written down that needs his approval before he sends out the invitations.

"And the seamstress will come tomorrow to make a gown for Miss Y/n-"

Silas cut him off. "No need. Send the seamstress to me first. I'll let her know what kind of clothes need to be made for the event, then she can take Y/n's measurements."

"As you wish, sir." Cadbury said, but Silas could see something troubling the young butler. They werent that apart in age, and both of them had practically grown together, each reading the other person well.

"What's the matter, Cadbury?" Silas set his teacup down.

Cadbury took a deep breath. "Its just- I dont understand why the palace is suddenly coming to visit you, after what happened at the dukedom ceremony. It was certainly... humiliating for them, so why would they be coming to welcome Miss Y/n into the family?"

Silas grinned. "They're coming to see who I replaced the princess with." He picked up his cup. "They couldnt break me down, so they're going to try their luck with the missus. There's another reason why the queen is coming, but you let me worry about that."

Cadbury looked concerned. "Then we should prepare Miss Y/n to make no mistakes."

"Dont worry, she wont." Silas smiled, making his butler even more confused. "Speaking of, did you observe her when she was cooking in the kitchen today?"

Cadbury nodded. "Yes. And as you'd said, she didnt touch, let alone cook with bacon or wine despite my insistence that its your favourite. She replaced the meats, and didnt use any alcohol at all!"

Silas chuckled, his eyes gleaming with intent. "Perfect. Just as I'd suspected." He looked at Cadbury again. "Are there any leftovers from the food she'd made?"

"Yes. I was about to throw it out-"

"No. Bring them to me. I'll eat them. If Y/n asks, tell her you fed it to the dogs and then they got violently sick." Cadbury was confused as he left to bring him the food. He thought that Silas didnt like your cooking, at least from what he'd heard him say to you.

Oh. Maybe the young duke just doesnt want to acknowledge that he enjoyed your food.

-

A week passed by quickly and the day of the royal dinner came. You were freaking out because Silas had barely spoken two words to you about how to act or what to say, just telling you to act as yourself and he'll take care of the rest.

"What the hell...?" You muttered, watching your reflection in the mirror. Okay, you're not a conservative, but even you knew that this plunging neckline was a little too much skin for this time period, especially in front of the queen!

You were wearing a white satin and lace gown- wedding gown, if you were being honest. All that was missing was a veil, but you guess that would be a little too much on the nose. The dress was beautiful, no doubt, but it was missing a whole lot of cloth around the neckline, the tight corset making your chest puff out slightly more with a snatched waist. Your collar bones looked prominent, but you would credit that to the bland food served in London. Seriously, why do they act like vampires when it comes to adding garlic?

"Your husband had this dress designed specifically for you, madame!" The seamstress told you as she added her finishing touches. "He must love you a lot!" You resisted the urge to roll your eyes as you wore the jewellery he'd sent for you.

Yes. Thats why I sleep on the floor while he sleeps in his bed. Hope he suffocates under those plush sheets. My backache is the sign of our true love.

"Oh, who did that to your hair?" You heard a voice behind you and you turned around quickly.

"Benny!" You squealed, watching Ben, Liam, Shepherd and Colin enter your room. "Ah, I'm so glad you all came."

"Of course we did. There's free booze-" Shepherd smacked Liam on the back of his head. "We're here because we're happy for you."

"And because they wanted to see the queen." Colin said, rolling his eyes, making the other two bicker with him.

"How's Silas treating you? Are you happy?" Ben asked in a low tone as he fixes your hair.

Oh Ben. He reminds you so much of Qasim. "Yes, Benny. Silas is very good to me. I couldnt be happier."

Ben had a sad smile on his face as he nodded.

Just a few minutes later, Silas entered your room. "Y/n. Gentlemen." He nodded to them, before pulling you aside. "I need to talk to you."

You looked at him surprised. Silas was concerned. He was nervous about something. You've never seen him break a sweat.

"What is it, Silas?"

"The queen is onto us."

"What?"

Silas looked at you exasperated. "She knows about our sham marriage." He casted a look to the boys, who were pretending like they werent trying to hear what he was whispering to you. Silas pulled you close by your elbow to whisper. "I have a source telling me that the queen knows you... you're not a Christian. That you're a Muslim."

You pull back to look at him wide eyed. "How- how did she- how did you-?"

"I suspected, you confirmed it now. But she knows. And she's coming here tonight to expose us. If she tells everyone tonight, then she'll be able to take away my dukedom and she will make our lives hell!"

Your throat went dry. "What- what do we do?"

"There's a way." Silas grip on your arm tightened. "We get married for real."

You tilted your head in confusion before shaking your head at what he was implying. "Silas, no-"

"We get a Nikkah."

A Nikkah? If... if you get a Nikkah with him, an Islamic wedding ceremony, then you'll be married to him for real. No- no, the only reason you'd agreed to his proposal was because you knew it was a fake marriage, it didnt really affect your conscious because it was a sham! But-

"No. Silas-"

"Y/n, please." Silas pleaded. "Dont make me beg. If the queen finds out, everything I've worked so hard for, it'll be for naught. She'll take it all away. Dont you- dont you want to help catch the lunatic behind those murders? Dont you want to make a difference by writing? If you dont do this, if you dont stand by me, we'll both be done for!"

You looked at him conflicted, your resolve starting to break as he continued to talk. "My sister, my parents, my grandfather... my family... they need me, Y/n. They need me to pull this off, for me to reinstate our honour, for me to remove the stain and stigma from my family's name. Please, I'm asking you to do this for me... for my family." He swallowed thickly, his eyes boring into you with intensity. "You once told me you lost everything. I'm telling you now that I'll lose everything if we dont do this. Will you let me lose everything, Y/n?"

Lose everything? Everything?

You shake your head. "No, Silas. I... I wont let you lose everything."

10 minutes later, there was an imam in your room. Silas had somehow managed to find an imam in London to marry you two off. But you suppose when you're so rich and well connected, you can find anyone.

This is happening. This is really happening.

With Ben, Colin, Liam and Shepherd as your witnesses and Cadbury and his wife as Silas's witnesses, the imam began the Nikkah ceremony.

Am I really getting married?

You watched the imam ask Silas some questions, and you tuned them out except for one.

"Are you a Muslim?"

You looked up. A flicker of hope! Yes! If Silas isnt a Muslim, he cant marry you! The Nikkah wont happen, or at the very least wont be real because he's not Muslim! He cant marry you, this will still be a sham marriage, a paper marriage and your conscious will be clear and you wont feel like throwing up-

"Yes. I converted an hour ago." Silas informed the imam. "I took my shahada, in sound mind and state, of my own will without any pressure or coercion."

No. Oh no-

"Do you take Y/n to be your wife?"

"I do."

"Do you take Y/n to be your wife?" The imam repeated.

"I do."

"Do you take Y/n to be your wife?" He asked again.

"I do." And with that, Silas signed the Nikkah contract. The officiant then turned to you.

"With the agreed mahr, do you take Silas to be your husband?"

"Mahr?" You whisper in a daze. The officiant looks confused. "Do you not know what your mahr is?"

Mahr is a gift to the bride given by the groom. It is a symbol of the groom's promise to care and provide for the bride. You're more surprised that Silas even knew what Mahr is.

"It must've slipped my mind to tell you." Silas looked at Cadbury, who handed him a document. "For your Mahr, I give you Westminster palace." You looked at the document, he really had signed it over to you!

"Silas..." You say in disbelief, your hands trembling a bit. He smiled reassuringly at you. "You wanted a house. Here's one."

House? He gave me a palace!

"Do you take Silas to be your husband?" The imam asked you. You stared at Silas, at his content face. He didnt have to sign over a whole palace to you, much less one which he'd just gotten from the queen!

And he looked perfectly content with his decision. Not a shadow of doubt. He... he trusts you? Trusts that you'll maintain this union? Wont run out on him- wont betray him?

"I do."

Does he believe that this marriage will last?

"I do."

Does he trust you?

"I do."

You signed the papers, your eyes still in a daze as Silas smiles charmingly at you before pulling you close to hug you. You hear everyone clap around you as he leans down to whisper in your ear.

"Thank you."

-

Silas escorted you to the dining room where all the guests were waiting. You were still quiet and in a trance as you walked by him, with your hand around his arm.

He's surprised it didnt make you suspicious with how quickly he'd found an imam. Truthfully speaking, Silas knew you were a Muslim when he first proposed to you. He had his doubts, which were confirmed by his observations especially with your aversion to foods that were forbidden for Muslims. And yes, the queen had also found out about you being a Muslim, but only because he spread the rumour to them.

The Nikkah documents, the ceremony, the Mahr, he had already planned it the moment he found out that the queen was coming over. And the reason why he waited until the last minute to spring this out on you was so that you would be pressured into saying yes. He just couldnt risk you taking time to think this through.

You may still be under the impression that Silas chose you because it was circumstantial or whatever, but he chose you to be his wife precisely because you were a Muslim. Oh he has plans to use you.

You're everything the English monarchy hates, what it stands for. You're not prim and proper, despite your best attempts. You work, that too disguised as a man, and you're far too strong willed and determined to prove yourself unlike the British high society women.

He knows the crown wont be happy to have Muslim bride in the family, much less a Muslim duke who just so happily signed off Westminster palace to his wife.

A Cheshire grin graced his lips, which people mistook for glee for being with his blushing bride. He's going to have fun ruffling the queen's feathers. He's going to tilt the palace upside down.

Curtsying to the queen, Silas immediately noticed and took great pleasure in the queen's displeasure at your dress. Yes, he specifically chose a wedding gown that showed too much skin for the conservative monarch.

"Your majesty, this is Y/n, my sweetheart." Silas introduced you so lovingly, you couldnt help but be flustered as you avert your eyes to the ground.

"Its an honour to meet you, your majesty." You manage to say without throwing up.

Victoria casted one unamused look to you. "Very interesting choice for clothing."

Oh shit. Shit. Shit. She hates it. I knew it-

Silas's hand gently grasped yours. "Thank you, your majesty. I chose it for her after being inspired by a painting my love gifted me. Ah, let me show it to you."

You already knew it was the stupid portrait he was talking about, and you wanted to hide away into a corner as you saw the disapproval on the queen's face- God, she doesnt mask any emotion, does she?

The queen turned to Silas. "I have heard a rumour and I would like you to address it now." She said, glancing at you.

Silas nodded, leaning down to press a kiss to your temple. "Why dont you go and help nana with the guests? I'll be right with you."

Sarah was introducing to the guests, but your head was preoccupied with Silas and the queen. They are definitely talking about me-

"Y/n, this is Mr Blackwood." You stared at the familiar face. "Oh please, Sarah. No need to be formal with me." He smiled charmingly. "Besides, miss Y/n and I have met before."

"Well, thats wonderful! You two talk- I have to find my troublesome grandsons before they embarrass me!" Sarah left you with Henry.

"Congratulations on your wedding." He said with exaggerated joy, though his eyes expressed anything but that. "I'm sure he offered you a lot of money for putting up a show. I just wish you'd told me about it before."

"Excuse me?" You frowned. "I'm not putting up a show."

He raised a brow. "Really? You expect me to believe that a FitzGeorge wants to marry you? Out of the blue?" He throws a look to your gown. "That this wedding dress wasnt him trying to just convince the world that you're his wife?"

Your jaw ticked. "You're right. This dress is Silas's way telling everyone we're married. Because we were married on paper before, but I have an imam, 4 witnesses and a Nikkah document stating that Silas and I are married, both in the eyes of the law and God." You watched Henry's face fall. What use was it lying when he already heard of the rumours. Rolling your eyes, you turned to leave, only for him to reach out and grab your arm.

"Why are you doing this?" Henry asked you, looking for any signs of you lying. He didnt find any. "You know you dont belong with him-"

"Oh? I dont?" You snapped. "Who do I belong with? No, go on. Tell me."

He pulled you close, looking into your eyes. "Me. You belong to me. You know it, you felt it- we have something. We have-" He lowered his voice. "I can give you everything you want. Whatever you'd lost in my shop, I'll find it again. I'll travel the world for it, just- come to me. Leave Silas."

"That is the most pathetic thing I've heard come out of a man's mouth." You yanked your hand out of his grasp, walking away from him. The next time you saw him, he was busy talking with Victoria's heir- Prince Edward VII.

"Sweetheart, there you are!" Silas grabbed you, pulling you along. "I was just telling her majesty about how we met. You remember, love?" He shot you a knowing look.

You nodded, remembering what you two had practised. "Yes. We met at the ballet theatre near Oxford. It was love at first sight-"

"Ballet theatre?" Victoria's voice was sharp. Your heart dropped as you tried to follow up on your lie. See, this is why you two should've discussed this because its hard to lie on the spot!

"She's an amazing ballerina! Ah! I was immediately charmed by her art! She bewitched me!" Silas said cheekily and you wanted to smack him for saying "bewitched" because this is still Victorian era and sure, they dont have witch trials anymore, but why would he risk even the accusation when it is literally the queen's ancestors who had a major part in burning up "witches" in the 1600s!

Look, people back then were dumb and evil, which is a really bad combination.

"Is she now?" Victoria looked at you now, with those piercing eyes. "I would love to attend a show of yours. See what these FitzGeorges fancy so much."

Oh she knows. You can see it, hear it in her monotonous voice that she knows Silas is lying.

And yet this dumbass continues to lie. "Of course! We'll host you for... Christmas eve?"

As Victoria left, you glared at Silas. "Why would you say that?! I'm not a ballerina and you invited her to watch me dance? Do you want to get caught?!"

Silas tutted at you. "You worry too much. Its not that hard, you know. Besides, you have my grandmother to teach you. Ah yes, nana will love it-"

"Silas!" You stopped him. "I cant learn ballet in a month!"

"Not with that attitude-"

"We will get caught. You will be caught, and I will be embarrassed and- and- I wont let anyone make a fool out of me, Silas!" He pulled you into his chest, shushing you.

"I wont let anyone make a fool out of you either, Y/n." He pulled your head back to look at you with those deceptively charming eyes. "You carry my name next to yours now. You're my wife now, and by association, your dignity is my dignity now. I wont let anyone make a mockery of us, Y/n."

You looked up at him and you believed him. How could you not, when lying comes so easily to Silas?

He watched Sarah console you, promising to help you learn. Silas his his smile as he picked up his glass, enjoying his plan falling into place.

Ah, it would be a pity to see your heart break when the entire theatre laughs at you.

Thoughts????

[lawva-girl]

Historically.. We don't mix. pt. 2

Law x fem!Reader, College AU

Pt. 1

Notes: Sorry i took forever, i kinda forgot i even posted this... HERES PT 2!!! let me know about any ponderances or possibly any errors... i dont have a beta reader or anything.. ALSO i could not come up with a nickname for reader..... so in the chat rooms i put "Y:" for "You". PLEASE tell me suggestions i will go back and fix it :D

WC: 2526

Back at the dorm that Law and Bepo shared, there was no chatter. Law was simply laying in bed with his laptop open to 5 tabs, one for each of the classes he was taking. He was taking all history classes this semester, since his counselor told him to. He would definitely miss the bio information but he did like history. Scrolling through each class, he breezed through all of the syllabus quizzes. Once he felt satisfied, it was onto checking his email, with one catching his attention. 

“DIRE!! MAKE AN APPOINTMENT OR TEXT ME ITS EMERGENT!” The email title felt like a scam but he knew it was not, in fact it was a daily burden. The man who had sent it, his counselor and adoptive father, always communicated like this. After opening the email, he found himself irritated again, Cora had only wanted to remind him that classes start today. 

“How would I not know?” Law muttered to himself. Reading through the email, then deciding he had been too neglectful of the man Law opened up their chat.

L: I know it was the first day, I got to my first two classes on time.  C: Good!!! I miss you! <3  C: Any new friends?!  C: Do you like your professors?? I hand picked them :D  L: Hand picked? You are making me socialize on purpose.  C: Not true! Nico Robin is the smartest! She already had her masters by the time most have an associates!  L: The classes are fine. Bepo made a friend, her name is Perona. C: Oh! Mihawk’s kid! Good to know she’s here! Is his step-daughter here too? Maybe y/n?  L: Yes.  C: Oh! I heard she’s similar to you! Maybe you two can be friends or something?  L: How long did you have to think to come up with this plan of yours?  C: No idea what you are talking about…. L: Cora.  C: … C: Anyways, have you gotten all the textbooks you need?  C: I want to make sure you find them all!  C: It's my job, you know.  L: I still have two more classes to go to tomorrow, but i’ll be fine.  L: Thanks.  C: Anything for you! We should meet for lunch soon! I can make you salmon rice balls! Like when you were still a baby… remember? You loved my cooking! L: I did not. You should not be in a kitchen alone, Ill meet you on friday at 11.  L: Don’t start until i'm there. Please.  C: Okay !!!!! C: I'll see you then law! C: Cant wait ! C: Sleep tight <3<3<3 

Law closed his laptop, relaxing his shoulders. He glanced over and Bepo was already asleep. He kicked off his blanket and got up to go to the bathroom. After he finished his business, washing his hands like any good bio major, he strolled to the microwave area. He had only wanted water but he saw the picture of him holding a letter, standing next to Cora. Staring at it, he wondered why the giant had wanted him to socialize so much. It’s not like he never sees human faces, or stays inside all day everyday. He just liked being alone when he could, no one to ask him stupid questions. 

After finishing his water, Law went back to bed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The two went through the rest of the week, meeting each other an embarrassing amount of times. Neither one had any reason to talk to the other, so they didn’t. Until Wednesday rolled around, and they were back in Nico Robin’s class. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Someone has it out for me. I know it for sure” You wrote in your journal, along with the date and class name. Looking at Law, like you had these past two days, made you realize it more. 

“I have pissed off whatever god actually exists and they want me to repent. There is no way that all four of my classes are naturally shared with Trafalgar.” You finish scribbling away in your journal, just in time. 

“Okay, pass forward the paper I handed out to you. This was just a fun assignment to see what areas we, as a class, are most interested in.” She spoke smoothly, with an even tone. It was almost like she didn’t care, or like she had done this 20 times. 

You heard some of your classmates groan and while you agreed, you thought it was inappropriate to voice that. Tapping a pen on the paper of your journal idly, you waited for more instructions. Even though your classmates weren't raised well, your father had done a fine job with you. You were nice, respectful, studious. Sure you are shy but it's not like it mattered. 

Why speak to people and risk being embarrassed if they don’t want to talk to you? 

“Okay, as I said before this class is based in groups and communication. Please tell one person about what you studied for this assignment.” Robin had said before sitting at her desk with a book in hand. 

Suddenly everyone was talking but you and one other person. 

“My assignment is on the Five years war. I chose it because of a coin flip, I found the sources in the library database.” Already you were irritated. Another interaction with the man who had no manners. 

“Hello. That is how you start a conversation, who raised you? Anyways, my assignment is on the First Crusade. I chose it because it was the first war I thought of-” “Really? The first? Liar.” He interrupted you, of course a man like him would. 

You squinted at him, before responding with “Not lying, I was watching a documentary on the pope a day before class, which made me think of all the holy wars. It's not polite to interrupt people.” 

“Okay. I think we have discussed enough.” “Fine.” You scoffed at him mentally, before turning back to face the front of the room. 

“Okay now, I want someone to tell me about their partner's work! This is worth participation, as a friendly reminder.” She smiled eerily 

You did not raise your hand, in fact you looked away. If you were called on you would end up having to lie, since stupid Trafalgar didn’t tell you anything about his assignment. 

“Okay, randomly generated, we will have Mr. Trafalgar, Mr. Reyes, and Ms. Churchill. In that order please.” “My partner researched the First Crusade, she told me that she learned about the context of the war. Specifically Pope Urban the second’s motivations for launching the crusade, who was mainly following the lead of the Byzantine emperor. She also learned about the cost of the war, not only economically but also what it did for the Pope’s approval rating.” Incredible. He pulled all that from his ass? Wasn’t he a double major? How long ago did he even learn that? How was he able to say it so confidently? He is actually smart?! Hold on, he could’ve seen the same documentary you did and just so happened to remember important stuff. But even then, he didn’t even hesitate, he was so confident, even with a professor like Nico Robin. 

“Very good, point earned. Mr. Reyes?”

As he relaxed into his chair, you couldn’t help but stare. His hair was sticking out, a bit unruly from his beanie. It was white with weird black spots on it, maybe a statement about faux animal fur? Could he be vegetarian or something? Maybe he likes to hunt? His sideburns went right into his weird facial hair, “should be shaved” was scribbled into your journal, along with “spots?” and of course “T is smart?”. You saw his black hair under his beanie and thought of your father, who would never slouch like the man in front of you was. 

“Okay good to hear. This wraps up our class for today, I’ll see you all on monday.” 

You started gathering your things, excited to go back to Perona. She promised she would have your favorite food ready for you as soon as your class ended. It was a little weird, but you two always were close. 

“Are you always the last to leave?” The sudden voice pulled you from your thoughts, and made you drop your pencil case. No pencils escaped but the case clunked right under whoever had just shocked you. Law, with no expression on his face, immediately thought of his giant  adoptive father; who was extremely clumsy.  

“No. Are you stalking me? I feel like the campus police or a trusted adult should know about this.” You looked up at him, not reaching for your case at all. 

“I’m not, somehow, we have the exact same class schedule. With the exception of my online class.” “That's crazy buddy… Will you grab my case?”

“You can’t get it yourself?” He scoffed and folded his arms. 

“I think the reason why I dropped it should be the one to get it for me, no?” You thought he looked childish, folding his arms like he just got told to go to his room. 

“Fine.” He reached down, grabbing the case and placing it on your desk, “even though you were closer to the floor… I'm sorry.” He looked away as he said it. Once again you thought he was childish. 

You found yourself staring again. This time you noticed his hands, the word ‘death’ tattooed on his fingers, and the heart on the back of his hand. Shocked to say the least.

“Holy shit.” Huh? You said that outloud? Maybe you weren’t nice. 

You looked up to see Law’s face, somewhere between shock and disgust.

“Oh uh.. I meant, holy shit your tattoos are cool. They look like they hurt.” Maybe you saved it, you really did mean it in admiration. 

“It was painful, but worth it. Bearable at times.” He looked at his hand and held it up between the two of you. Shocked that he held it up for display, you raised your eyebrows. Staring at the tattoo, you were about to reach out and hold his hand closer so you could get a better look at the line work. Then your thoughts were interrupted.

“I know we aren’t on the best terms, but you heard the professor. I think it would be a good idea to bite the bullet and partner up.” He said it so matter-of-factly you almost agreed without realizing you were lost. 

“Huh? Partner?” you blinked up at him. “Of course you weren’t paying attention. The collaborative presentation that you and another student must present on the 18th?” He sounded annoyed, but his face wasn’t telling. 

“Yes! Sorry I got lost in my thoughts, we might as well partner up. I don’t have anyone else in mind, so I can stick with you.” You finished packing, finally, and stood up. Swinging your bag onto your back, you held out your hand towards him. 

“Okay… What is that for?” He nodded down to your hand. 

“Give me your phone. I’ll put my email in. We can make a google slide and share it that way.” 

He paused, with a semi frown on his face then gave up. He put his phone in your hand, and watched intently as you typed in something. Then you returned his phone, much to his delight. 

“Bye then. Just do 5 slides on the First Crusade or whatever other war the pope has started.” He put both of his hands in his pocket as he casually strolled out, leaving you to the room. 

“Hey! We should at least pretend you won't be a dick this whole time! Don’t boss me around!” You realized that you had said that just a bit too loud for the circumstances. Maybe you weren’t nice. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y: Okay! I just left class, do you have my salmon nigiri?  Y: You won't believe how good I was today. P: WHST  P: who are you?  P: The y/n i know would never ever say that.  P: Yes i do have it ready :) Y: I had to partner up with Him :/  Y: The strength  Y: Also he has finger tattoos?  Y: What the fuck.  P: You didn’t see them before?  Y: Sir traffy has been through it P: I wonder if hes like some ex-gang member? P: That is such a gang member thing to get tattooed P: Why aren’t you responding?  P: Helllllooooooo  P: y/n P: y/n P: ….

“Rona! You are literally crazy. I was walking over here, that's why I wasn’t responding.” You closed the door behind you, making sure to lock it. 

“Anyways! I’ve never seen you have such a strong reaction! To a guy no less, did he like to recite everything in the declaration of independence?” Perona called out to you while you entered and took off your shoes.

You walked over to the kitchen, where she wasdoing some dishes. Tossing your bag on the couch, then taking a seat at the bar that was connected to the kitchen. “If he did that I would’ve proposed on the spot… He just is kinda smart? It’s freaky! One second he’s brushing me off and not wanting to talk to me at all, the next he's explaining the cause of the First Crusade? Well… Kinda.” Perona turned with two plates in hand, and took a seat next to you. She placed the plate of sushi in front of you, “Well honestly i'm not surprised… Bepo says he is always studying.” 

“You talk about him with Bepo? Perona…” you made a disappointed face at her as you pulled your plate closer to you. “Noooo it’s all kosher! Bepo just offers up info about everyone he knows. I think he just doesn’t have a filter or whatever.”

“Yeah…” you took a piece of nigiri and dipped it, then ate it. As you chewed and swallowed you thought of your dad, “Do you think your dad would come visit us here?” 

“Hmmm only if your dad forced him to. I can picture it now ‘don’t you miss our girls?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Then lets go! You pay and ill bring the beer!’ ‘beer isn’t allowed on a plane shanks’ or something like that…” Perona tried her best but didn’t really get the overall attitude of your dads. You decided not to comment and just take another bite. 

“Do I get to know why you asked?” Perona said, food in her mouth.

“Traffy, as you call him, has hair as dark as Mihawk’s. It made me think of him today…”

“Sigmund Frued would have a lot to say to you right now.” “No he wouldn't, he’s dead.” 

“Not for long…” “What the fuck?” You both burst out in laughter at the same time, something you had only ever done with your sister. 

After dinner it was off to bed, except you weren’t actually sleeping. Your laptop was open on your lap, on the google slides page. The document was created, named, and shared to Traffy. It wasn’t the most well-mannered thing, but you decided that nicknames meant you’re friends. Your sister desperately wanted you to have friends, and this would make her think you had them. You didn’t like the deception, if you could call it that, but it's not like you were gonna go out and get real friends. 

You started typing away, filling out 3 slides with information and pictures before deciding to get actual sleep. 

[life-winners-liveblog]

grians reaction whenever someone roles a nat 20 on something mildly stupid is so real!!

im loving this so much i cant wait to see what happens next!

-crimson!

Grian: After so many tries and refusals you see what's clearly a Druid and a Fae sneaking around.

Scott: Oh so we are meeting the others aren't we? Ok, my character approaches them "Greetings".

Scar: "Hi!"

Pearl: Scar! I mean "what do you need, we were on our way"-

Scott: "You two look like you know a bit about the wilderness that sorrounds this town" he asks.

Pearl: "We do, who's asking".

Scott: "Oh I'm just a humble traveler"

Martyn: Pftt, Humble.

Scott: Martyn! I'm trying to get in character!

Martyn: Sorry, sorry.

Scott: "And I would desperately need guides to accompany us".

Scar: "And what do we get out of this?"

Scott: Scar??? Why-no, nevermind, I get it, It's more realistic. "I don't know, do you need for something in return?"

Pearl: "There has been some recent...incidents, I'm sure with your help we could find the cause."

Scott: "Oh! Of course, that would be agreeable!"

Scar: "Is it a deal?"

Martyn: This is why you made your character a fae isn't it?

Scott: "Yes".

Grian: The two of you shake hands, now you only need for more strenght to defend you.

Scott: I look around.

Grian: Everyone roll perception.

Scott: 14!

Scar: ...6. What's with these low rolls man?

Pearl: 11...hmmm...

Martyn: 18

Grian: In the crowd Martyn sees a strong figure, tall and of a bigger scale then anyone he has ever met.

Martyn: And there comes Cleo huh? "Hey, I think I see someone that might be the one we need".

Scott: I'll go and talk to her.

Cleo: "Hello little elf".

Scott: "Hello m'am I would like to talk to you real quick".

Cleo: "Hmmm... go ahead"

Scott: "Me and a group are going to be traveling north and you were wondering if you were willing to...come with? For protection"

Cleo: "North huh? And why should I?"

Scott: "It's of extreme importance and no one else was willing... we'll pay you handsomely if you require it of course but-"

Cleo: "I'll come with."

Scott: "Oh you have all my gratitude".

Grian: Finally! It happened! Oh that took so long! Ah! And thats a wrap for session 1! How was it?

Scott: Weird but fun!

Pearl: Not bad... if you don't count the leaps in logic...

Grian: I prepared this in two hours ok!? The rest of the campaing will be more organised!

Martyn: Not horrible, surprising since you made it.

Grian: Really Martyn? Really?

Cleo: Oh this was surprisingly exciting.

[stellar-constellations]

hi !! just wanted to pop in here to request smth as well as tell you i love your writing sm !! i cant wait for part 11 of "the alliance" comes out !! there fr needs to be more yuri content in spy x family.

also, have you ever thought of crossposting your work on wattpad/ao3/quotev ? i only say since at workplaces and school tumblr is usually blocked, and when i have a bad day im always here rereading your writing.

ANYWAYS ONTO MY REQUEST ofc its gonna be yuri x reader !! it can be headcanons or an actual oneshot, whatever you want to do, but ive always wanted to see how yuri would react to birthdays, whether it be his one or y/n's.

anyways, thanks so much for reading this. even if you dont do my request, i hope you know how genuinely happy and giddy youre writing makes me and other.

        Yuri Briar x Fem! Reader

        This can be read with or without reading my Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series: An Alliance (part 1).

        Beware! This fic DOES contain SPOILERS for the manga and for the Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series: An Alliance (part 1)!

        Series information: Setting is AFTER the reader rejoined WISE (so Yuri and [Y/N] are married and [Y/N] becomes an official double-spy).

   Yuri doesn't exactly like celebrating his birthday, even when he was a kid he didn't care much. The only thing he really has to look forward to that day is Yor visiting him. Other than that, he sees the day as any other day. He wouldn't even celebrate if you and Yor didn't make him every year. 

        You and Yor would meet up the day before his birthday and bake a cake together. Afterwards, you'd both go shopping for birthday gifts. 

        Yuri swears he's in paradise on his birthday. You AND Yor both spending time with him, laughing and getting along with each other? That's enough of a birthday gift for him (until Loid and Anya walk through the front door).

        Other than that, Yuri would rather spend the day relaxing off work. He'd be up to going for a walk or a restaurant for dinner, but he's a little simple.

        "Yuri, it's your birthday, we're supposed to celebrate!" you explained. 

        "I know, I know. It's just... I've never really celebrated my birthday much growing up." Yuri admitted.

        When his parents died at a young age, he didn't really have the time to celebrate when he was busy studying for school. Yor would at least make him a cake (it wasn't very good... or edible) before heading out for work, leaving him to his own devices for his birthday. He didn't have birthday parties because of how poor they were and he didn't make friends either for anyone to attend them.

        "It is my responsibility as your wife to celebrate your birthday with you because according to this ring, I'll be with you for all your other birthdays." You spoke, showing him the silver ring with the ruby on top that he bought you.

        Your words made him tear up, his face turning red as tears and snot rolled down his face.

        "You're an angel!" he exclaimed, hugging you tight enough to suffocate you.

        "I know, now let go before you kill me and I won't be here next year!" you gasped, hugging him back despite your words of "let go"

        On your birthday, he's much more energetic and fun (he's a hypocrite).

        He'd buy you your favorite flowers and cook your favorite breakfast for in bed. After breakfast he'd bake a cake from scratch using a cooking book (no, you cannot help. Go watch TV or read a book). 

        He'd take you somewhere that you like to go or that's of interest to you: an aquarium, zoo, park, flower garden, beach, sports game, anywhere you'd like.

        He would blow his entire week's paycheck on gifts for you (he works for the state, he has the money). 

        "I have a reservation for that fancy restaurant that just opened up down the road." Yuri spoke, tying the tie on his suit.

        "How'd you get that done? There was a waiting list before that place even opened?" you questioned, brushing out your hair.

        "I have my ways." Yuri smiled. 

        "I hope none of those ways involved threats and bribery." You sighed, placing your hands on your hips as you looked at him.

        "No, no, I would never!" he said in a high voice, obviously lying. "...Maybe a little."

        "You'd go that far for me?" you questioned, holding your heart as a warm fondness stirred your chest, your heart beat raising. "You're such a sweetheart!" you cooed before kissing him on his cheek.

        "Psh! It was nothing! I just wanted to do something for you since you did something for me on my birthday." He spoke, acting as if it was nothing (the blush on his cheeks and the smile on his face said otherwise). 

        Thank you so much for requesting! I do apologize for the request being short, I personally don't have much experience on birthdays due to growing up in a family where we don't do much for birthdays.

        I'm also working on writing a request for a Christmas one shot for Yuri that will come out in the middle of December so stayed tuned for that!

At the moment, I'm also crossposting my work onto Ao3, Wattpad, and Quotev. I've finished uploading the Yuri Briar x Fem! reader: An Alliance series onto Wattpad and Ao3. My account name is "Stellar Constallation" for Wattpad and "StellarConstellations401" for Ao3.

        Want more Yuri content? Check out the Yuri Briar x reader masterlist!

        Have any other requests? Check my official masterlist to see the characters I write for: Masterlist

[joestvr]

༺✮ atashi no kimyona jinsei // あたしの奇妙な人生 ✮༻

༺✮ summary: five years after the fall of diavolo, you, y/n romano, who was sent away to japan at 11 to further your studies—find the courage to come back to naples after living out your schoolgirl & gaijin university student facade in morio-chou to see how your clan’s worsened—as well as become the “donna” of your father’s gang, il terrore, while your older brother is the real leader behind the scenes, just using you as a front. with plans to murder your clan, you seek the particularly handsome young don of passione for friendship. with your tyrant father’s intervention, your friendship with the don turns to something you never saw coming.

★ 1 // il terrore ★ 2 // bella

You awoke that morning to something warm and large beside you. When you opened your eyes, you realized it was Vince sleeping soundly with you. You hit him.

"Vince!" You yelled. He flinched.

"Ugh, Y/n..."

"Get the hell out of my bed!" You took your pillow and started hitting him with it.

"Jesus, okay, I'm leaving..."

"How perverted are you?! Idiota!"

"Sorry!"

You sighed loudly and rubbed your face, getting up to take a shower.

You got out, fixed your hair, did your makeup, and put your outfit on.

You pulled on your black, leather Prada calf boots with a 3 inch platform heel. "Alexander!" You yelled.

"Alexander!"

No response. "Alexander!"

You screamed with annoyance. "Ughhh!"

You stormed out your room and into Alexander and Alima's. You could tell they were naked. "Ew!"

"Y/n!" Alexander woke up and shouted.

"Get up!" You said even louder.

"Shut the fuck up! Get out!" He pointed to the door.

★★★★★★★★★

Trish was sitting at the dining table with the gang eating breakfast when she heard her phone buzz, and she had gotten a text.

g morning, cant wait 2 c u. lets go out. xo y/n &lt;3

She smiled to herself reading the text, typing her response.

morning babe, eating brkfast w the guys... will be hella hard to escape them agh! meet u in 25 @ plaza? xo trish.

She waited for your reply and her cell phone buzzed again.

omg v is such a piece of shit guess where i found him

She chuckled a little to herself.

in ur bed again? lmao he alwys wants 2 sleep w u

shut up! its not even funny anymre hes totally a douche. fking bozo i swr

She laughed a little more.

stfu hes ur bsf. cut him sum slack babe

ok i gtg... alx is yelling at me. c u in a bit x

x luv u bye

Her smile faded when she realized everyone had stopped eating from their plates and were looking at her dead in the eye.

"What?"

"Who were you texting?" asked Mista.

"Why do you care? Pipe down." She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

She rook her last sip of her coffee and stood up.

"Trish, where are you going?" asked Bucciarati.

"I'm going out."

"To see who?" questioned Fugo.

"My friend! What is wrong with all of you?"

"We just want to keep you safe, Trish, calm down." said Giorno.

"Too many scumbags walking the streets. You never know what could happen." mumbled Abbachio.

"Trish is not sneaking around with some guy, everyone. Please." Spice Girl suddenly appeared beside her, reassuring the group.

"Bucciarati, can I have some money?" Trish asked nicely, looking at him, puppy eyed.

"For what?" said Abbachio bitterly.

"I'm going shopping."

"Sure, Trish," he pulled out his wallet and gave her fifteen 10,000 lira bills, "spend it wisely. Have fun, be safe."

She snatched the money with a smirk. "I'll be back later." She kissed his cheek.

"Don't forget you need to be here to come with Giorno to see that guy with Il Terrore at 4!" said Fugo as she picked up her bag and walked out.

She arrived and stood in front of the Prada store, waiting for you.

When she spotted you, her face lit up with delight and she ran to you, jumping into your arms. "Y/n!"

You hugged her tightly and spun her around. "Trish!"

"I missed you so, so much, Y/n. You have know idea how things are without you. I'm so happy." She kissed your cheeks and you did the same.

"Your hair is so pink, and longer!" You ran your fingers through her hair, amazed.

"You haven't changed one bit. You look super sexy though." She grinned.

"Please, look at that body of yours! Too gorgeous."

She linked her arm into yours and walked into the Prada store.

"I saw this bag in a- a maga— a magajin- sorry, magazine."

"Your Japanese accent is insane now, Y/n. The Don will be amazed. Did you know he's half Japanese?" She said.

"No, he's not. I heard he has golden, flaming hair like the morning sun, and bright green eyes."

"That's true. He's really tall too, he grew so much since the first time I met him."

"How tall?" You were eager to know; you love taller guys.

"He was 170cm 5 years ago, now he's 195cm. Bulked up a lot since then."

"You're kidding! That's so hot!" You became happy.

"Ha. He's so handsome, every girl from every family wants to marry him."

"You don't like him?" You turned to her.

"Not at all, to be honest. He's like my brother."

"You're living with all those hot men and not interested in any of them? Huh." You raised an eyebrow.

She blushed and looked away, "Narancia, on the other hand..."

You gasped, "You have a crush!"

"He's so cute... like really cute."

"Zaaaaamn, I see you." You smirked.

"I guess. I want to buy this for Bucciarati, look." She picked up a black leather belt with the Prada Milano logo engraved on the buckle.

"Get it."

"Okay," she waved over an associate, "wrap these up for us, and send them to the front."

The person nodded and took the items you and Trish wanted to purchase to the register. You walked with her there and pulled out your money, but she did as well.

"Trish, please let me pay."

"No, Y/n, please let me pay."

"Trish."

"Y/n."

"Trish, let me pay."

"Y/n, I'm paying. End of story."

You rolled your eyes and put your money away, "Fine. You win."

She got the bags and handed one to you, smiling.

"Thank you, Trish."

"No problem, Y/n." She wrapped her arm around you as you walked together.

"Hey, why don't you give Vince a chance? I know how much he loves you."

"Ugh, as if!" You said, "I really tried, you know. His pride won't allow him to actually be committed to a relationship with someone like me. I love him a lot but I don't want anything long term."

"But if he wasn't the way that he was and he really wanted to haved something with you..." She raised her eyebrows.

"No, I wouldn't."

She furrowed her eyebrows. "Damn, okay then."

"But the thing is, I have to be married with a kid before 25," You frowned, "Guys don't like me."

"Girl, I can see at least 15 men looking at you as we pass by. Look, that guy riding a bike just crashed into a trash can, he's looking right at you." She laughed.

You looked over and saw a man laying in a pile of trash cans staring at you with bliss on his face.

"Yeah, but who's going to truly love and embrace me? With the way my mom was treated by my dad and how I was raised... I've lost all hope."

"I think you'll like the Don, Y/n. I think you'll really like him." She squeezed your arm and smiled at you.

"Sure I will..."

Trish looked down at her watch. "Look, it's already 3. I need to head back before everyone gets suspicious..."

You kissed her cheek again and nodded.

"See you later, Donna." She teased, waving then walking off.

★★★★★★★★★

You were sitting at your vanity, putting on lipstick when your stand, Cheri Lady decided to appear.

"Are you seducing him or making a deal with him? Yare yare... Such a temptress." She mocked you, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.

You had gained Cheri Lady as a result of your mother's death 8 years ago, your father had stabbed you with a Stand Arrow in a sorrowful rage.

Cheri Lady can steal a stand and/or its ability with just one touch and can recall its power at any given time. For example, since you had once temporarily stolen a stand with a healing ability, you could recall the stand and heal yourself without a problem. But you mostly use her to induce hallucinations on enemies, which works without even having to take their ability.

Another thing your stand is capable of is extreme physical power... Think: Star Platinum meets Spice Girl.. Kind of.

As well as tremendous raw power, Cheri Lady benefits from your negative thoughts and give rude commentary about you and the way you live your life and constantly criticize you...But she only says what you think-- She's just a manifestation of your conscience.

"Damare, Cheri Lady." You touched up your eyeliner and powdered your nose a little.

"You look like a prostitute, Y/n, what the hell are you wearing?"

"Leave my sight!"

"Hmph, as you wish, Y/n-sama." She said sarcastically then disappeared into your body.

You checked the time, put on your shoes, and rushed downstairs. "Vince, Alima! Let's go!" You shouted, picking up your keys quickly.

They rushed downstairs and everyone was out the door. Vince was wearing all black suit with no tie, his chest showing through his unbuttoned collar shirt. You tried not to laugh at him.

Alima was wearing nearly the same thing as you except her shirt was red.

You could feel anxiety creeping up but took a deep breath, seeing the beautiful riverside view from outside the restaurant, and you spotted that golden blonde hair. You rushed over.

"Ciao, Don Giovanna. Romano Y/— I mean, Y/n Romano." You held out your hand, but a man with purple hair and lipstick blocked you from doing so.

Everyone gasped. You could see Trish standing beside Giorno warily.

She's... a woman?! Everyone thought in their minds.

"Abbachio, please," Giorno muttered. He scowled and moved.

You were taken aback at the Don's beauty. He was... gorgeous.

Giorno bowed slightly, taking your hand into his and kissing your knuckles, then gesturing for you to sit down. "Please, sit down, bella."

You smiled softly and sat down. "You've got quite the personal guard here, Don Giovanna."

"It's Giorno, but please, call me GioGio. Rolls off the tongue nicely, don't you think?" His charms and politeness were getting to you. You were allured.

"Alright then, GioGio..."

"Can I call you Bella?" He asked.

"Sure." You nodded.

"Get on with the deal already! I don't have all day." said Abbachio, irritated.

Giorno shot him a sharp glare.

"May I know the names of your men?"

"Trish is here too, you know." He pointed her out. "She's my best friend, like my sister."

"Hey, bitch." She scoffed fakely. Everyone gasped again.

"Hey, ugly." You grinned and she put a hand on your arm playfully.

"I'll ask later..."

"Anyway," he put his hand on the shoulder of a man with a bob cut, wearing an expensive suit, the belt Trish bought for him visible, "This is my consigliere, Bruno Bucciarati."

He looked down and kissed your hand tenderly, "Pleased to meet you, Donna."

You smiled. "How charming..."

Giorno felt a pang of jealousy in him, then spoke again, putting his arm around the one in the beanie, "My caporegime, Mi—"

"Guido Mista. Head of Execution. Didn't know there would be such a pretty face running Il Terrore. Bellissima." He pushed Giorno aside and kissed your hand. Giorno's face twitched.

Narancia pushed Mista and kissed your hand as well. "I'm—"

"Narancia Ghirga," You interrupted warmly, squeezing his hand.

"Eh? How do you know who I am?" He questioned.

You looked at Trish, then back at him and winked without a word.

Fugo quickly shoved Narancia aside, cursed at him, then bowed formally, taking your hand and kissing it. "Pannacotta Fugo. Head of intelligence. It's an honor to meet you, Donna."

"Wow! So polite~" You teased slightly, smirking. You pulled away and looked up at the purple haired man. He was just standing there, looking at you angrily.

You maintained your expression and looked up at him, holding out your hand. He crossed his arms, your charms clearly not working its magic on him.

You felt a little discouraged, retracting your hand then turning to Giorno again.

He swallowed dryly then spoke up. "S-So, may I know the names of your friends here as well?"

"Yes," you directed your hand to Vince, "Vincenzo Sayyid, my capo."

"Ciao." He said.

You then looked at Alima, "Alima Dokhtari, my sister in law. She runs the treasury and whatnot."

"Glad we can meet like this, Don Giovanna." She smiled polite.

"So, Bella, I just want to be up front... Are you sure you are willing to give me everything you've offered?" He asked tentatively.

You took a sip of wine. "Yes, would you like me to give or take a few rekuwiam— Excuse me, Requiem arowszu— Arrows? Sorry," You put your hand on your chest and cleared your throat, "Tasuketekure..." You muttered to yourself.

"Nihongo de hanishimasu ka? Sono accento..." He grinned.

Your eyes widened. "Kimi wa.. nihonjin desu..ka? Maji de?"

Bucciarati and others looked at each other with confusion at the sudden language change.

He laughed and shook his head, "Iyaa. Hafu desu. Boku no oka san wa nihonjin desu."

"Sou desu ne.. Subarashi desu. You don't look half Japanese at all." You were in awe.

"Haha, I get that a lot. Anyway, about the deal..." He went quiet as a waiter approached with the bottle of wine.

"Can I refill your glasses?" He asked. Giorno nodded and put out his glass.

"Sir, do you allow smoking out here?" You asked as he poured the wine in your glass.

"Yes, go ahead. I'll bring you an ashtray."

You took out a cigarette and stuck it in your mouth, Cheri Lady appearing for a split second to light it with a flick of her finger. You pretended to not notice.

Giorno was stunned. Bucciarati looked at the men beside him in shock.

You turned your head away and blew smoke out your mouth, mindful of Giorno.

"So, as I promised," you said, "your 10 million lira," Vince opened a briefcase and the cash was seen in there, "your stand arrows," another briefcase opened, showing the arrows.

Giorno, utterly appalled, could not find any words.

You were insanely beautiful. He was allured, enchanted. Blood rushed to his face and it reddened.

"GioGio?"

He snapped out of his daze and nodded, "Er, y-yes. Everything looks perfect, Bella."

"Are you sure you don't need anything else? I can add an extra 5 million—"

"No, I insist. You've offered more than enough. I'm grateful you are willing to give all of this to Passione." His expression lightened with gratitude.

"If that's what you wish." You said, taking a drag from your cigarette, holding it between your fingers.

He noticed your almond shaped nails were painted nearly the exact same red as the wine. Must reflect off of your personality...

"Can we please get to the topic we discussed, Giorno?" asked Fugo condescendingly.

"Uh... Yes." He said.

You looked at him with curiosity.

He cleared his throat and your eyes met. "There has been an issue in our community regarding traitors."

You abruptly coughed smoke out of your mouth. "I-I'm sorry?"

"Y/n, forgive me if I'm being insensitive, but there have been various punks caught with kilo after kilo of drugs claiming that they're from Il Terrore... and that you put them up to this."

Vince suddenly gasped loudly and yelled out, "What an outrageous claim! Y/n—“

"Vince!"

"Y/n, what is this absurdity?! No such thing is happening in—“

You breathed in shakily, trying not to lose your temper as you slammed your hand down on the table.

"Vince, if you don't get the fuck out of my face and let the Don talk, I'm going to punch you." You murmured calmly, looking away from him.

He backed away slowly and Alima scowled, grabbing his ear, pulling on it while hitting him.

You sighed, putting out your cigarette bud. You put a hand over your mouth with humiliation, then lit another cigarette.

"I'm so sorry about him, GioGio, he has no manners whatsoever," you inhaled, "But as for such claims... They are all completely false. Drug dealing of any kind has been prohibited since the founding of Il Terrore, even during my father's reign... and I'm sure you've heard of his tyranny."

Giorno was internally giggling and kicking his feet, he knew he was in love already. He was blushing and staring deep into your eyes.

"I do hope you'll believe me, Giorno."

He smiled wide and nodded, "Of course, gorgeous."

You cracked up a little as Abbachio smacked the back of his head.

"S-So, um, I was thinking..." His voice trailed, and he was turning red like a tomato.

"What the Don wants to say is we were discussing going on a mission early tomorrow morning to confront some people holding drugs in their storage spaces." Bucciarati continued, standing behind Giorno and putting his hand on his shoulder.

"Sure." You said, then stood up as he did.

"I'll see you tomorrow, GioGio." You smirked softly and leaned in to kiss his cheek.

Giorno was speechless as he watched you walk away.

[damienthepious]

i need discord reacts everywhere because i want six flaming elmos heralding this post actually. well. imagine them instead i guess!!!!

heart beats best in a bed (ch 24)

[ch 1] [ch 2] [ch 3] [ch 4] [ch 5] [ch 6] [ch 7] [ch 8] [ch 9] [ch 10] [ch 11] [ch 12] [ch 13] [ch 14] [ch 15] [ch 16] [ch 17] [ch 18] [ch 19] [ch 20] [ch 21] [ch 22] [ch 23] [ao3] [Rating: Mature Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast Relationship: Lord Arum/Sir Damien, Sir Damien/Rilla, Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla Characters: Sir Damien, Lord Arum, Rilla, (others? eventually?) Additional Tags: Second Citadel, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday, Rivals With Benefits, (I CANT BELIEVE THAT WAS ALREADY A TAG THANK FUCK), Mutual Pining, Secret Relationship, Denial of Feelings, Alternate Universe, (it’s not ROLE reversal it’s like. RELATIONSHIP reversal), (the timing is fucked with), (who knows who first), Sex with Feelings, Relationship Negotiation, (i literally never know how to tag things), (some miscommunication and mild angst in the future), Pining While Fucking, Porn With Plot Summary: Sir Damien is a committed, dedicated knight with a shining record and spotless reputation. Barring, of course, his one minor indiscretion, his singular, secret exception. It does not bear mentioning, of course. The arrangement is purely practical, purely physical, utterly inconsequential, of course. It is not as if a monster would- could care for him in any meaningful way, after all. The idea is impossible; as impossible as the idea of Sir Damien possessing any feelings whatsoever for the monster in return. Chapter Summary: Damien is finally confirmed to have a clean bill of health. A little celebration is due. Chapter Notes: Damien repressing literally everything definitely won't have consequencies.

~

Rilla gives him the note in the morning, the official sign-off on his recovery, her eyes very dark and very warm over her table as she bends down to write. She uses ink, for this, instead of the charcoal she uses for the notes she does not record with her mechanical device. When she finishes, she angles herself lower to blow gently across the wet ink, though her eyes linger on Damien, sending little sparks of heat racing across his skin as he stands and waits.

When the ink finishes drying, a short eternity later, Rilla straightens, rolling the paper and slipping it into a case.

"Your all-clear, Sir Knight," she says as she passes the cylinder into his hands, the irony in her voice softened by the conspiratorial tilt to her smile and the lingering warmth in her eye, as well as by the way she allows her fingers to drift across the back of Damien's hand before he can pull it back.

Damien nods, hoping that he looks more dignified than he feels, hoping that it isn't painfully obvious the way it feels as if his heart is caught in his throat, stopping up any words he might manage to summon to his lips.

Sympathy in her eyes, for half a breath, but she does not give him any breathing room. "Now that that's squared away," she says, that same mellow heat in her tone, "will you be joining me for dinner tonight?"

[read more on ao3]

[whenwillderekhalebehappy]

so i just started playing fallout 4 ,,, here are my preliminary opinions

- lame storyline, i don't want to be married heterosexual. idc abt this fuckass baby either.

- fr tho, it feels like the devs just chose the most generic backstory they could think of so they could get that part out of the way. it's not interesting or good. moreover, if that actually happened to a person, they'd be traumatized and terrified, not running around looking for guns and stimpaks. like, it feels like my character doesn't even give that much of a shit that this happened. like ooh the world ended, my wife was murdered, my infant child was kidnapped, it is 200 years in the future, but yeah no i don't have any questions, ill just roll with it. LAZY WRITING!

- also: how does the survivor know that his baby is still alive. the story has him frozen, unfrozen to witness murder and kidnapping, frozen again and then unfrozen to start the game. how am i supposed to know when that kidnapping happened? like yeah it could've been recent but it could also have been 100 years ago.

- upon exiting the vault you immediately start like 11 quests. why?? for what reason?? i just got here??

- do not love that feral ghouls will just lay on the ground waiting for you to get close enough so they can attack you. 1. its annoying, you get ambushed every time. 2. why would they be doing that, are they sleeping? waiting? doesnt make sense for them to be doing either of those things. they're feral, they wander around attacking whatever comes near them, they don't lie down and wait for prey, thats just ,,, not how they work?

- i especially dont like that the ghouls also dont show up as hostile on the little navigation bar until they get up. the whole point of that is so i know if there's hostiles in the area. if all the hostiles just sneak up on you, there's no reason to look at it.

- the fact that you can just max out your SPECIAL stats kinda defeats the purpose of those stats. the point is that it allows you to pick strengths and weaknesses for your character, instead of it being skills you can learn. it adds difficulty and personalization.

- i genuinely don't like the "improved" graphics. maybe its because my pc is shitty and i have to run low quality, but i cant see shit. especially all the harsh shadows make it really hard to gauge depth and to see things on the ground (like feral ghouls waiting to attack you).

- why is VATS under Q. thats dumb

- follow up: why are we now using the enter key and arrow keys in addition to wasd. let me keep my hand on the mouse instead of constantly having to switch (update: after 10 hours in-game i found out you can also press E, still stupid)

- why cant i just go up to people and ask them shit. why do i have to wait until they want to talk to me.

- i do like the whole settlement building thing. ive been having more fun with that than anything else tbh

- it is nice that you can make radaway and you dont have to rely on scavenging or bartering for it

- they are harsh on the raiders. like i get that they're enemies but labelling them 'raider scum' is a bit much. like thats still a person.

- in the intro thing they say war never changes at least 3 times. i get it. dont overdo it.

- also in the intro, they just say the US ended ww2 by dropping the bombs on hiroshima and nagasaki which is a VERY BOLD statement about history.

- i've barely encountered anyone who's nice. ive met preston and his friends but beyond that its basically been nothing but raiders. where are the friendly npc's? it makes the whole world feel hostile and empty

- the variety of weapons and mods is ,, actually a little too much. i don't know the difference between a pistol and a revolver, let alone what a receiver is. the game kind of expects you to just , understand what all these things mean and how to best modify your weapons. I don't. i barely know what i'm supposed to be looking at. "um yeah i definitely prefer the hardened enhanced glowsighted tempered auto pipe revolver pistol over the hardboiled standardized incendiary double barreled shotgun rifle" <- statement dreamed up by the utterly deranged

- recently encountered super mutants, why do they yell at you that they are super mutants. i know that. i mean, the character technically doesn't since no one's bothered to explain all the new creatures to him, but still.

anywho, ive only been playing for a week or so, so there might be more redeeming qualities later on. but so far im not very impressed

[defo-not-sfw]

20 Questions for Writers

Thanks for the tag @starfleetwitch you dont mind if I get my lawyer in the room for these do you?

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

*Consults with Lawyer*

Ahem... to my knowledge, there are 4 on Ao3. HAH! Cant catch me that easily old sport!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

I've been reliably informed its currently 42,037. Is this an interrogation or a friendly chat? Come on come one. Get to it, we all have homes to get back to.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

*Lawyer mumbles something in my ear*

Your honor, I can disclose that I've written for Holby City and Doctor who/ Unit AND NOTHING ELSE!

*Murmuring in the courtroom*

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

According to my carefully maintained and TOTALLY innocent paper work:

We're both adults

What happens at the office party stays at the office party

The Princess's Language lesson

I have a proposal

IN THAT ORDER. Go head, check the data. I'm telling the truth, your honor. Honest as an... honest... thing...

5. Do you respond to comments?

I AM NOTHING BUT INNOCENT AND KIND AND GRACIOUS IN MY COMMENTS.

*bangs the table*

WHAT ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF HERE?!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

*panicked murmuring from the lawyer*

Due to the nature of the written documents in question, I've been advised to not mention The Princess's Language lesson

*Sound of a lawyer face palming*

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

We're both adults your honor! It's nothing but pure happiness from start to finish, I SWEAR your honor. I am nothing but a writer of pure fluff and happiness, I've never written anything else in my life WOULDN'T KNOW HOW TO your honor.

*looks down to see the lawyer has written SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! on a piece of paper*

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No your honor. I have a person blocking me from posting certain things but thats a whole separate thing unrelated to this case WHICH YOU'LL HAVE TO GET A WARRANT to question me on. SO THERE!

*Lawyer pulls out a bottle of whiskey and starts necking it*

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Lawyer:

Me:

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

*Lawyer knows we're fucked now and just straight up leaves*

Oh e...errr.... erm.... Oh god... shit. Fuck. Erm... Just the one published currently... errr... C-c-can I possibly get another lawyer?

*The Princess's Language lesson falls out of my pocket*

SHIT DON'T LOOK AT THAT! ITS ABOUT A FAIRY PRINCESS LEARNING TO SPEAK! ITS SO BORING AND INNOCENT! DONT LOOK AT IT! ITS TOTALLY NOT KATE STEWART ABSOLUTELY WRECKING MALCOM TUCKER FROM THE THICK OF IT! I SWEAR! ITS JUST BORING BABY SHIT ABOUT A PRINCESS AND MAGICAL PONIES! 😭😭😭

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

*Uncontrollable sobbing*

If I did, would that help my case?!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

*Absolute wailing as I wish a bad translation could explain away my sins*

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

*Sobering*

YES! BUT YOU'LL NEVER GET THEIR NAME! I DONT GRASS! SNITCHES GET STITCHES!

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Kate Stewart WITH LITERALLY ANY FEMALE! No... no wait BERENA! NO WAIT KATE STEWART!!!!! NO BERENA!

FUCK IT! KATE STEWART/ BERENA IF I CAN HAVE ONLY ONE! UNLIKE YOU YOU SICK FUCK I DONT CHOOSE BETWEEN MY FAVS! I LOVE THEM ALL EQUALLY AND HAVE THEM LOVED EQUALLY!

*The Princess's Language lesson falls out of my pocket again*

I SAID DONT FUCKING LOOK AT THAT!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

THATS SUCH A PERSONAL QUESTION AND ITS REALLY NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

*A fic about Serena wearing a strap falls out of my pocket*

STOP LOOKING AT THE SHIT THATS FALLING OUT OF MY POCKETS YOU WIERDO!

*A Zoe and Frankie locked in a records room WIP and a Jacqui with a tied up EVIL!Kate WIP fall out of my pocket making an awful racket as they roll around the floor like a tin can filled with nails at 3am when you're trying not to wake the house*

Before you say anything... I've never seen those documents in my life. They were CLEARLY planted on me in some CONSPIRACY to paint my character as a writer of FILTH.

I'd like this incident struck from the record please

*A currently 10,000 word WIP thats just PWP Kate/Serena/Bernie also falls out of my pocket*

What even is the point of pockets in women's trousers these days?! CAN'T HOLD SHIT!

16. What are your writing strengths?

*Still recovering and stuffing the wips back into my shallow ass pockets*

Apparently I've written some really decent GAY!straight sex, but I can't tell you why people have said that. I have NEVER written smut in my life!

*The Princess's Language lesson falls out of my pocket again*

I'm gonna mc fuckin' loose it in a second

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

*Trying not to cry again*

Finishing things. Posting things I HAVE finished. Getting my creations past the person I mentioned earlier that blocks me from posting shit. Again fuck you though, you need to open up a whole new court case to get me to talk about that.

SNITCHES. GET. STITCHES. Your honor.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Please be clear on your questions, your honor. I'm clearly struggling here. I dont know what this means. Is this a controversial point? Do people in general have opinions on characters using their own language at times?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

You honor. I come to you on my knees a shattered shell of a human being. I am a broken horse. Please dont rub salt in my wounds that I completed straight smut before I completed gay smut and just accept that it was an unspecified part of the Jemma Redgrave cinematic universe.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

We're both adults! I had a very specific writing method for that fic and though it took me a year to complete, I COMPLETED IT and I was happy with the result.

*The Princess's Language lesson falls out of my pocket again*

Lets just... get the tags over and done with. Interrogation over. I feel like I just got RINSED.

@ktlsyrtis @seahorsepencils @colourmestoked04 @akaanonymouth @shippingsincebeforeyouwereborn @lapalfruity @kowarth @backjustforberena

[avvidstarion]

General 1, 7, 8 story 2, 3, 7, 11 and romance 1, 5 and 11 for canon character avvid!!!

completely 100% canon companion avvid who is also from my brain

General:

1: Where can your Tav be recruited? 

you can find avvid face down peter griffin death pose completely unconscious rolling death saves somewhere near the wreck site (they were not as lucky in the crash as you were). in order to recruit them you have to use the help action, a potion, or have shadowheart heal them

7: Do they have their own personal quest that spans the course of the game?  Can it take different branching paths depending on the choices the Player Character makes?

hmmmm i dont have this down 100% yet ( i still need to beat the game after all) but here are the basics:

avvid's backstory is the same-- they escaped from their creche/the astral plane after learning that vlaakith intended to turn them into an egg machine in order to further her eugenics breeding program. avvid worries that by being abducted by the mind flayers has accidentally dragged them back into the life they were trying to avoid

if you do the rosymorn monastery stuff with them in the party the creche leader will recognize avvid as an escapee and has orders from vlaakith herself to turn them in alive (they cant make eggs if theyre dead). fight will ensue as usual and when vlaakith shows up to tell you about the astral plane she will also encourage you to turn avvid in

at some point you will have the opportunity to actually turn avvid in but if you try to do that they will become hostile and you'll have to kill them

their quest will be a mixture of lae'zel's and gale's. lots of fighting gith soldiers and pissing off vlaakith (avvid is pretty anti-orpheus, unlike lae'zel, though. they just view him as another potential dictator who will be no better than vlaakith). their quest would be like gale's in that there will be a lot of avvid thinking "i need to become the most powerful necromancer and lich of all time so i can finally kill vlaakith and protect myself and also so that i will be Useful". especially if you give them the book of thay (they fight astarion for it). they will also have a lot to say about ketheric thorm/myrkul ("how come that guy was the chosen of myrkul and not me, huh???"). you can encourage them to pursue power and safety or to pursue the quiet a life they have always wanted (even if they will always be on vlaakith's bad side). you can also pull a dragon age and harden them if you want-- basically you can either let them to continue to be overly trusting and gullible or soft or have them become more cynical and hard

basically it's a choice between letting avvid fully walk away from vlaakith and live their best life (even though they will forever be pursued by the gith) or letting avvid take the fight to vlaakith and pursue necromantic power and lichdom (and safety). it's about letting avvid remain trusting and open and in love the with the world (and yeah a little gullible) or letting them become more mature and cynical and a little less happy (but less likely to be taken advantage of).

8: What do they say when the Player Character asks them to stay in camp?  How about when the Player Character asks them to come adventuring again?

"All right. At least I'll have more time for reading."/ "Wonderful! I can't wait to see what the world has in store!"

Story Specific:

2: How do they advise the player character on Raphael?

ohhh avvid is so gullible and curious to a fault so they'd completely fall for raphael's bs. "he seems nice <|:-)". if you choose to make them more cynical they will do a 180 and condemn raphael but if you choose to keep them soft they'll be hesitantly interested in what Raphael has to offer

3: How do they react to Astarion biting the Player Character?

they are jealous of the player character they are happy that the player character let astarion feed bc they feel sympathy for him and they are fully trusting that astarion won't hurt anyone in the party

7: What can they be found doing at the tiefling/goblin party?

they'll be kinda sloshed (they are a lightweight) and acting pretty differently from their usual shy self! they'll be singing and dancing and talking to everyone and laughing a lot and just so happy and free! everyone thinks it's very endearing that they're so happy and if the player character chooses to romance them this will be one of tav's "oh" moments where they realize that they might have a crush tee hee!

11: What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?

they are soooo shy and socially awkward so they go completely red and pull their hat down over their eyes and let out a small embarrassed (but endearing) shriek

Romance:

1: Is your Tav a romanceable character?  Are there any specific requirements to romancing them?

they are! there aren't any specific requirements beyond getting their approval high enough. I think they'd fall in love with you pretty easily and they'd be the character you have to turn down in like every playthrough that you aren't romancing them lol

5: Does the romance have different branching paths, or just one route to take?

I think it would depend on whether or not you choose to keep them trusting and naive and also whether or not you'd chose to have them commit to their dreams of lichdom. they will still love you no matter what but if you choose those options they become less, like, idealistic and overeager about their expectations? like less "we are going to settle down and live happily ever after and im already planning our wedding after a week of knowing you" and more "i love you and will kill for you but i cant make any promises about what our future holds and when i ascend to lichdom i will outlive you but it's okay cause when you die your bones are joining my skeleton army"

11: What are Tav’s plans for the future?  Do they propose to the PC, or is marriage not something they’re interested in?

see the above! if you choose to keep them as they are and discourage them from pursing lichdom i definitely think there would be an option to propose to them <3

[rk-ceres]

3 ) You Protect Her Potter!

PLEASE CHECK ALL TW IN MAIN MASTER LIST FOR THE BLOOD OF MERLIN

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With My Life

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She pushed her sunglasses up the bridge of her nose “see if you would just learn how to behave yourself this wouldve never happened” Draco sneered at her as they walked through Kings Cross station “Draco Artemis didnt do anything wrong! Remember children, Lucious wants you both home for Christmas holiday” Narcissa raised her voice. “Why do you care for her mother? Shes just an orphan that eats our food and wastes our space” he scoffs as she takes the trunks and places them on the train getting on shes the first one to their compartment she sighs as she sits down by the window her usual spot closing the door unzipping her bag and climbing in once she gets to where her Animagnus potion is brewing repeating the incantation that was needed til the next electrical storm she takes off her glasses walking to Igneous’s enclosure “hey boy..” she said quietly petting his beak she sighs out as he lands on his rock perch nudging her head slightly she smiles “hey cut it out” she laughed at the almost fully grown bird “are you sure you want to stay with me? Youre free to go whenever you please iggie” she coos ‘theres no where id rather be than with you.’ The voice said as he placed her head on his as she grew her understanding of animals became stronger and stronger she didnt know exactly when she started to be able to understand them fluently its just something she had grown to love. she sighed sitting down on the rock laying slightly he put his head on her stomach as she pet him “i could just say a cup fell on my eye. Its believable” she groaned he side eyed her “your right you’re right” she said softly as he closed his eyes again “i could say i got into a fight” she asked again ‘or just tell them the truth’ the bird said sighing out “the truth? That i had a cane come down on my eye because Lucious didnt like the fact a first year muggle born is going to be rooming with me?” She asked ludicrously ‘precisely’ the bird looked up from her “you know i cant. He’ll literally kill me?” She rolled her eyes at the bird ‘theyre coming’ he moved away as she put the glasses back on 

“ARTIE! ARTIE YOU IN HERE!” George yelled “IN IGNEOUS’S PEN!” She yelled back laying out in the sun  Igneous’s head looks up as Fred George and Lee come into the pen “Hey Artie!” Lee called out sitting next to her laying back mimicking her stance looking up at the clouds “hey cool glasses can i see?” George asked before she could protest he pulled the glasses off her face “George no wait!” She said eyes widening as he stood there shocked looking at her blackened eye he looked her in the eye her blood vessels had popped in her eye making blotches of red in the whites around her eye she looked down and away from his gaze his gaze hardens as Fred stepped next to him his hands went to her face making Artemis look up at him “what happened?” George asked in a cold low voice “its nothing George im fine” she said turning away from him reaching for her glasses that he threw across the room when he saw her reach for them “BULLSHIT ARTEMIS!” He yelled she flinched turning around walking away from him he got even more angry following her out of the enclosure “George drop it” she warned “NO! IM NOT DROPPING THIS ARTEMIS! WHO DID THIS TO YOU!” He yelled again  “George stop” she said wiping the tears from her eyes “NO! Im not going to stop! Someone hurt you! And youre protecting them!” He yelled she turned around her face flushed with tears “i cant tell you even if i wanted too” she looked at him and Fred in the eyes his eyes widened in shock “i cant tell you” she sobbed more  as she whispered softly Fred moved closer to her moving her hair out of her face so he could look at her “why cant you tell us love? Can you show us instead?” He asked in a soft voice “are you sure youre okay?” He asked slowly she looked at him with her big eyes and he knew his lips pulled into a line “okay.” He said softly he looked to George “she’ll tell us when shes ready George” Fred said softly Lee coming up behind them pulling her into him hugging her he cups her face in his hands looking at her “it’ll heal up nicely.” He said so they could hear him as he shoots George a glare “if you ever yell at my best friend again i will hex you” he spat out “and you if you ever hurt Artemis i will kill you!” Lee said playfully to Fred “ME?!? Why me?!!” Fred yelled “because you two are in loooooove!” Lee jested she pushed him off of her “shut up” she laughed smiling at the three boys  

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“Before you sit down you will be sorted into your houses” we heard Migonigal say as we walk to our usual spots sitting down “how was summer Artie?” Angelina asked “it was great! How was yours?” “We went to Rome” she smiled “ARTIE!!” A small voice yelled Artemis looked up and saw Ron waving at her “hey Ron” she said back softly Draco sneered at her with a smirk “HARRY POTTER!” Migonigal screams her head shoots to the direction of the stage ‘Padfoot, Artie tartie, wheres Athena and Apollo? are you ready to meet your god brother?” Uncle James smiles at her as she jumps up into his arms “theyll be here shortly prongs.” Sirius said as he followed his best friend farther into the house “come on, aunt Lily is in here with little Harry” James tells her as he walks through the house into the birthing room “theres my little bug!” Lily said with a big smile as James puts her down in her arm “want to hold your little brother?” She asked Artemis nods her head up and down with excitement Lily holds her into her lap as James hands her the newborn “Artemis this is Harry James Potter, you two are going to be great friends like your dads’ Lily coos she was shaken “we got Potter!” George yelled “you okay love?” Percy asks “yeah… i think hes my god brother” she whispered as she leaned her head on his shoulder “im going to head up to my dorm. I dont feel good” she told the group getting up and leaving the table half way down the hallway “ARTEMIS!” Fred yelled running adter her “here. You didnt eat anything. Take it and eat” he said smiling she takes the napkin “thank you” she smiled softly at him “does your eye hurt?” He asked “like a bitch.” She laughed as they walked together “i know you want to ask me” she said softly taking a bite of bread “im okay Fred i just…. Have to make it to fourteen” she said with a smile “is someone hurting you?” He asked not wanting to know the answer but needing to “its stops when i can get away” she said vaguely “your brother said that he got to Romania okay” she changed the subject he shook his head in disappointment “he sent me a dragon scale.” “You ever going to stop dancing around this subject?” She looks down “ask me anything else” she said softer “why did you rush out of dinner?” He asked she held out her hand placing it gently on his cheek showing him the memory that she had uncovered  “you knew Lily and James Potter and you held Harry as a baby?” “Im not exactly sure what i saw” she said as she slowly walked “thank you for telling me something. It sucks being in the dark sometimes.” She looks at him “i promise. I’ll tell you everything when im able too. Im willing to vow on my magic” she says as they stand in the hallway “i want you to know me. Just as much as you want to know me” she looks down “i just cant say yet” he looks down at her “okay. Thats all i need to know” he said as he walked her to her dorm “hey. You getting a room mate?” Fred asks seeing the trunk “yeah. Dumbledore said that he thought company would be good for me. Seeing as how my nightmares are under control. He owled the family i stay with informing them coming into the school term” she said sitting on her bed pulling out a book he sat down next to her leaning against the headboard 

“so, you ever going to tell me what family youre staying with?” He asked genuinely “well. The wife is technically my god mother. She somehow was best friends with mum.” He looked at her “my cousin. Not that theyd ever admit it freely is trying to cover up the good sweet person they really are to appease their dad.” She takes a deep breath out “the dad is just. Cold and mean.” She said her arm tensing “so what are you going to do at fourteen?” He asked “i want to move back into Grimmuald place. Kreacher is still there. Hes a friend not that he’d ever admit that” she said rolling her eyes “youd better get out of here before we get into trouble” she said poking his side “alright! Alright! Stop that tickles!!” He laughs standing up “i’ll see you at breakfast” he calls before walking out of the room she smiles til her face hurts. The door opened fifteen minutes later “Before you sit down you will be sorted into your houses” we heard Migonigal say as we walk to our usual spots sitting down “how was summer Artie?” Angelina asked “it was great! How was yours?” “We went to Rome” she smiled “ARTIE!!” A small voice yelled Artemis looked up and saw Ron waving at her “hey Ron” she said back softly Draco sneered at her with a smirk “HARRY POTTER!” Migonigal screams her head shoots to the direction of the stage ‘Padfoot, Artie tartie, wheres Athena and Apollo? are you ready to meet your god brother?” Uncle James smiles at her as she jumps up into his arms “theyll be here shortly prongs.” Sirius said as he followed his best friend farther into the house “come on, aunt Lily is in here with little Harry” James tells her as he walks through the house into the birthing room “theres my little bug!” Lily said with a big smile as James puts her down in her arm “want to hold your little brother?” She asked Artemis nods her head up and down with excitement Lily holds her into her lap as James hands her the newborn “Artemis this is Harry James Potter, you two are going to be great friends like your dads’ Lily coos she was shaken “we got Potter!” George yelled “you okay love?” Percy asks “yeah… i think hes my god brother” she whispered as she leaned her head on his shoulder “im going to head up to my dorm. I dont feel good” she told the group getting up and leaving the table half way down the hallway “ARTEMIS!” Fred yelled running adter her “here. You didnt eat anything. Take it and eat” he said smiling she takes the napkin “thank you” she smiled softly at him “does your eye hurt?” He asked “like a bitch.” She laughed as they walked together “i know you want to ask me” she said softly taking a bite of bread “im okay Fred i just…. Have to make it to fourteen” she said with a smile “is someone hurting you?” He asked not wanting to know the answer but needing to “its stops when i can get away” she said vaguely “your brother said that he got to Romania okay” she changed the subject he shook his head in disappointment “he sent me a dragon scale.” “You ever going to stop dancing around this subject?” She looks down “ask me anything else” she said softer “why did you rush out of dinner?” He asked she held out her hand placing it gently on his cheek showing him the memory that she had uncovered  “you knew Lily and James Potter and you held Harry as a baby?” “Im not exactly sure what i saw” she said as she slowly walked “thank you for telling me something. It sucks being in the dark sometimes.” She looks at him “i promise. I’ll tell you everything when im able too. Im willing to vow on my magic” she says as they stand in the hallway “i want you to know me. Just as much as you want to know me” she looks down “i just cant say yet” he looks down at her “okay. Thats all i need to know” he said as he walked her to her dorm “hey. You getting a room mate?” Fred asks seeing the trunk “yeah. Dumbledore said that he thought company would be good for me. Seeing as how my nightmares are under control. He owled the family i stay with informing them coming into the school term” she said sitting on her bed pulling out a book

he sat down next to her leaning against the headboard “so, you ever going to tell me what family youre staying with?” He asked genuinely “well. The wife is technically my god mother. She somehow was best friends with mum.” He looked at her “my cousin. Not that theyd ever admit it freely is trying to cover up the good sweet person they really are to appease their dad.” She takes a deep breath out “the dad is just. Cold and mean.” She said her arm tensing “so what are you going to do at fourteen?” He asked “i want to move back into Grimmuald place. Kreacher is still there. Hes a friend not that he’d ever admit that” she said rolling her eyes “youd better get out of here before we get into trouble” she said poking his side “alright! Alright! Stop that tickles!!” He laughs standing up “i’ll see you at breakfast” he calls before walking out of the room she smiles til her face hurts. The door opened fifteen minutes later “Hello” Artemis calls as the bushy haired girl walks in “you must be Hermione, im Artemis” she smiles “hello” the girl smiled shyly “is that the new fantastic beasts book?” She asks excitedly “yeah. I just finished it. Would you like to borrow it?” She asked “if i can” she said shyly “sure. Here” she hands the book over to the girl “so. How you liking hogwarts so far?” She asks as they sit on their respective beds  “its amazing here I just hope that I can make friends” she said looking down “just why wouldn’t you make friends Hermione?” Artemis asked gently “because im a muggle born, and a know it all” She said reading her book “well. I’ll be your friend” “you will?” She asked “of course” she smiled to Hermione. Fred sighed as he fell back on to his bed left leg hanging off as he brought his arm under his head looking up at the roof of the bed “what’s got you in such a good mood?” George asked him as he looked over “probably something to do with Artemis” Lee said shrugging his shoulders “he only smiles like that after he and her hang out” Lee said rolling his eyes. “I do not!” Fred shook his head as the two boys gave eachother a knowing look “you fancy her dont you” George asked “I do not. Shes just a friend. One of my best friends actually” he said glancing to his brother and Lee “shes actually dethroned Lee” Fred continued “theres more there Fred we’re not blind” George rolled his eyes “seems like the only people who dont see it is you and Artie” Lee commented “you two love eachother and the sooner you realize that. The better for Lee and i.” George sighed out “go to bed gits” Fred sighed turning over “im just saying the way you look at Artie is the way dad looks at mom.” George sighed laying down “but she doesnt look at me the same way George” he said in a sad voice “even if i did like her im not saying i do. She’ll never fall for me.” Fred said to the air “do you really think she’d ever fall in love with me. Shes… she deserves better than this” he turns over facing the wall “Fred. Youre as good as any other bloke in this school. Id date you if you were into guys” Lee complemented they both look at him “youre….” “Yeah” Lee said looking down “cool.” George said “what kinda guys?” He asked following up that statement Fred was grateful that the attention was off of him “im not completely sure really. But this isnt about me this is about Fred” shit so much for that he thought to himself “youre falling in love with her, and you dont even see it” Lee shakes his head “im not falling in love” Fred sighed out im already in love he thought to himself “go to bed” Fred frustratedly said

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The next afternoon Fred and George knock on Hermione and Artemis’s door she opens it “wh… what are you guys doing here? This is the girls dorm?” She asks slowly “we’re here for Artemis. Probably got her head too stuck in a book need us to remind her to eat most of the time. Im George. The funnier twin” he smiled walking into the room “and im Fred. The handsomer twin!” Fred said following his brother in “Hermione. Hermione Granger. Artie was gone when i woke up” Hermione said as she closed the door “shes still in the room. Just in a different part” Fred said as he picked her bag off from the ground and onto the bed stepping in leaving George and the confused girl alone “well you coming Granger?” George asked as he held open the bag for her “is this okay?” She asked softly “yeah. Just have to drink a potion when you get in. Artie's animals spook easy, she made us drink one when we first went in it just makes you smell like a dragon” George smiles at her “come on. Dont be shy i wont bite” he smiled at her guiding her down the ladder “come on. Their this way” George smiled at her leading her to the library seeing the plaque that read Athena Wahineleonahenahe Wyllt on it “try not to lose your mind Granger” George winks at her pushing the doors open “ARTIE! FRED!!” He yelled into the library as Hermione looked around with wide eyes “OVER HERE GEORGIE!!” Fred yelled back they followed his voice to Artie’s potions set up “Afternoon George” Artie smiles “i see you found my roommate in the dorm” she rolled her eyes playfully at him “ehat did you expect us to leave her there?” “No not at all. I wouldve brought her but she was asleep. Your git brother offended her” she said playfully “who Percy?” George asked “no Ronnie” she said “what did that git do?” Fred asked rolling his eyes “i corrected him in charms, then after class he called me a know it all. And Artemis found me brought me back to our dorm i guess i fell asleep” she shrugged “dont mind him Mione. You seem really nice” George started “and if he messes with you again. We’ll prank him” Fred continued “be nice boys” Artemis warned “we should probably head down for dinner. Mione wanna go to the bathroom before hand?” Artie asked “sure. We’ll meet you two down there” Hermione smiled at the boys she glanced to Fred who was intently watching Artemis with her potion lovingly looking down at her as she worked “are… are they a thing?” She leaned into George whispering “theyre best friends Hermione” Artemis said out loud making Fred look at Hermione with reddened cheeks Artemis laughed at the first year and Fred “well. When we get back from dinner we can come back and read together” “are we invited?” George asked in a hurt voice “when have i ever told you and lLee no?” She asked rhetorically “gasp you tell me no all the time!” Fred said in fake hurt Hermione laughed as they exited Artemis’s bag “see you guys at dinner” Artemis called walking with Hermione linking arms heading to the bathroom “so whats going on with you and Fred?” She asked with a cocked eyebrow. “I think its one sided on my part Mione” she said sighing out. “What do you mean?” She asks as she locks the door to her stall “i meanObviously i was doing something to make you question George in the library” “it wasnt you Artemis. It was Fred that made me question” “no need to boost my ego Mione. Fred only sees me as a friend” she laughs “but do you only see him as a friend?” “I see him as my best friend” not what i meant and you know it Artie” Hermione muses “stay where you are Hermione. Do not move” Artemis warns as she stares at the troll in the room “im going to slowly kick you my bag… unzip it get in and wait” she whispered “whats going on artie” Hermione whispered back “just do as i say. I wont let you get hurt when Ron Harry Fred and George storm into the bathroom and all hell breaks loose 

HERMIONE DUCK!” Artemis screams the trolls club hit the bathroom stall doors “protego!” Artemis points at Hermione as the debris land on her “Hermione Run!” She yells as the troll whacked Artemis flying her against the sinks “aressto momentum!” Fred screamed before she could slam against the sinks groaning as she landed on the porcelain softly “thanks Fred” she groaned “IM not LEAVING you!” Hermione yelled back “RON! Swish and Flick” Hermione yelled as Fred and George made their way to Artemis who was still laying still groaning pointing to the troll “petrificus totalus” she groaned out as Ron levitated the club out of reach just as it was stepping toward the young boys “you alright Harry? Ron?” She asked pulling them into a hug “fine Art” Ron said “good cause im going to kill you you git!” She yelled rolling off the sink and into Georges arms he stands her up “I had it covered Ronnie” she said matter of factly he rolled his eyes as George placed one of Artemis’s arms around his shoulder Fred mimicking him on the other “you alright?” He asks “just peachy” she groans Ron drops the club knocking the troll out she snaps her fingers the troll levitating off the ground as the professors walked in she charms the troll to Severus who nods at her “thank you Ms. Black.” He said with a nod “all in a days work of a superhero” she muses he smirks trying to hide a chuckle. But failing “thats enough Ms. Black” he said with a small smile “but you would be so lost with out your favorite non Slytherin student”she fake pouts as they all giggle “im the highlight of everyones day! Hogwarts favorite girl wonder! I’ll have you know that without me everything would be destroyed.” She jests earning a smile from all but one teacher. Quirrel “getting off topic here Minnie” Quirrel said with an eye roll “What are you six doing down here!” Minerva yelled as she looked at Artie hanging off of the twins shoulders “its my fault professor” Hermione’s voice rang out the bathroom “i heard about the troll and i thought that i could take care of it myself. But i was wrong. If it wasnt for Artemis, Harry, Ron, Fred and George id be dead” she lied as Artemis watched “they saved me Artie was about to summon an animal from her bag when the boys rushed in she got flinged into a wall Fred broke her fall and she petrified the troll while ron Knocked it out when Harry was on the trolls shoulders” Hermione continued “sorry Artie” Hermione called out “not a problem im just glad you’re all safe “Mr. And Mr. Weasley please take Artemis to the hospital wing. The three of you will be awarded 10 points each for your bravery. Five points will be taken from Ms. Granger for a reckless act. And ten points will be given to Mr. Potter and Mr. Weasley for sheer dumb luck” Migonigal shook her head “off to bed. The lot of you!” As Fred and George slowly walked her down “guys i can walk on my own. Im fine” “too bad Artie. Youre letting us help” George said “sorry we spooked the troll” Fred called out “we were worried about you and Mione, cant have our two bookworms being pummeled now could we?” George jests “thanks guys, I really appreciate it.” Artemis said as they hobbled down the path “I assume you two are staying while I heal her bruise?” Poppy asked “if thats okay” George and Fred say in sync “its amazing how you two do that” Artemis said pulling off her shirt  through out the months Her Fred George and Hermione got to know eachother becoming a tight unit she told Harry about what she remembered about his mom and dad and that she was his god sister they get really close

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“Artie are you sure about doing this?” Fred asked as he padded his side of the Slytherin common room with glitter bombs “oh, definitely I said I wanted to be here didnt I?” She looked up at him floating hers to the top “how did you guys get the password to the Slytherin common room anyway?” She asked “guys stop chatting and hurry up its almost time for them to come back!” George called out from the entrance Artemis rolled her eyes as they exited “we’re done George. We were just coming out” she said as they all walked to the corridor in front of the Slytherin common room they watch as Draco, Crabbe and Goyle walk into their common room and fear. Thats the only thing that she could describe filled her as a loud boom erupted from the room tears started leaking from her eyes as the three boys walked out Dracos eyes locked on hers as she reached for a wall but grabbed on to Freds hand he tensed up looking down at her. Her eyes well up with tears as they both look down at her hyperventilating as Draco walks right up to her but before he could reach her George steps in front of her Fred squeezes her hand as she starts to cry rubbing his thumb over her fist when Draco steps back “my father will be hearing about this you filthy orphan your days are numbered Artemis we’re going home for Winter holiday do you not remember?” Draco sneered Fred pushed her behind him protectively not letting go of her hand “what does your father have anything to do with this Malfoy?” George sneers back at him “im sorry I..l didnt know that you were going to be first back I..I” Artemis stuttered out “dont apologize to him Artemis it was us that planned it” Fred said angrily “oh she didnt tell you? pathetic really this disgrace of a human is my cousin. shes staying with us in the elf’s quarters. all shes good for really you ever think of where she learned to do wandless magic from? or where she got that ugly facescar from? Or where all her bruises and scars come from is because shes a stupid elf that cant do anything right. Shes worthless and youre better off without her in your lives. Its a miracle shes even still alive unless… you put out for them like you put out for father” Malfoy snickers staring right into her eyes “lets see how well you fare without your guard dogs protecting you.” Fred squeezes her hand tighter she drops his hand with tears spilling out of her eyes Fred and George look at her face stained with tears and back to Draco she runs off in a different direction before Migonigal said “Detention with Hagrid tonight” she got back to their dorm room and quickly went into her bag locking it from the inside where she lets herself cry herself to sleep a few hours later she wakes up and gets ready snapping her fingers to Hagrid’s hut “ARTEMIS!” Hagrid excitedly said “Hey Hagrid im here for detention” she sighs out “alrighty. We’re going to be patrolling the dark forest” “what? Why?” She asked “someones been harming the unicorns.” He said “alright you take Fang. He’ll keep ya safe. And split up from here” he explained she just nodded at him ‘I hate this forrest’ Fang shook his head “you and me both pup” she said as they walked through the forrest they hear a noise and she runs “protego” she points at the gold baby unicorn “bombarda” she yells pointing to the cloaked figure as the baby unicorn runs away she waves her hand and her wand comes to her hand

“confringo” the cloud of black smoke rushes her as she casts the shield charm around her and it disappears into nothing knocking her on her feet she sighs out as Fang licks her face “yeah. Im fine boy” she laughs “hey stop that. That tickles” she laughs as he looks back to the forrest she looks up to the baby unicorn “hello beautiful” she whispered out sitting on her knees the unicorn comes up to her “im glad youre okay” she whispered out as she pet his snout “youre pretty” she complemented as the young unicorn licked her face she giggled ‘thank you for saving my life’ his horn glowed as he talked “I was just doing what any brave wizard wouldve ‘thats not true. Most wizards use unicorns for selfish reasons, only Hagrid and Olivanders treat us with the respect we deserve’ a feminine deep voice called out ‘I want to reward you for saving my foal’ she called out her horn glowed as she weaved a chain choker necklace with a small phial shaped like a tear drop fastened itself around her neck ‘the phial around your neck is of my tears, that can only be used once in a lifetime. Unicorn tears are highly sought out and can bring a person back from the dead if they had just died. Use it wisely. My friend. Only you can take off the phial the chain is made out of phoenix feathers it will keep you in good health while wearing it. The tears will only work if you choose to heal them with your entire heart. There are no reprimands from gifted unicorn tears their soul will stay intact unlike when you drink our blood. Please. Allow us to escort you out of the forrest’ the unicorn explained as she turned for her to hop on “I dont know how to thank you” Artemis called out as she hopped on the unicorn

‘we owe you a debt. If you ever need us. Wish for us with this incantation’ she nods hopping off the unicorn next to Hagrid who looked awestruck “alright lets get you back to the castle” he said as he walked her to the gate “Pumpkin Spice” she whispers to the lady in the painting its near midnight and shes exhausted and sore walking through the corridor leading into the common room she looked up from watching her feet to Fred sitting on the sofa in front of the fire “what are you doing up?” She asks “i was waiting for you” he said looking to the hallway “if youre going to press me for answers tonight i dont have the mental compatibility to answer questions im drained” she said with a sigh “im fine. Its okay I can handle it. I deal just fine back home. Malfoy shouldnt have said what he said i dont want to talk about it. More like i cant” she sighs out “on a good note a unicorn gave me a gift tonight” she smiled softly at him hoping it was enough for him he looks at her neck bringing his hand to the pendant holding it in his hand looking up to her eyes ‘what did Malfoy mean?’ He thought to her her smile dropped “Fred please..” she said softly he runs a hand through his hair frustrated “i know youre mad. Just trust me will you?” She whispered “trust you? Artemis all I’ve been doing is trusting you and you give me nothing to go off of!” He raises his voice to her she flinches “its never Artemis you havent called me that since that detention… im sorry whatever i did i…” he cuts her off still angry at her “im trying really really hard to give you space and be a friend but you make this so.. so..” he lets put a deep breath as she looks at her hands in her lap “i cant do this anymore. Not tonight i cant do this tonight before i say something *i* will regret. I dont want to hurt you Artemis. I have to walk away im too angry right now, Im glad you made it back safely. Have a merry Christmas” “Fred please you have to understand!” she sobs “we’re still friends Artie… Lia, I just cant argue tonight.” He “all my life its just been me! This isnt easy for me! I’ve never had anyone care before! Why can’t you get that i just cant tell you everything right now! Please just let me explain” she cried he turned around and wiped her tears “i know that this is hard for you. But its not easy for the rest of us either. I have to go up stairs. We’re okay, okay?” He asked slowly ascending up the stairs to his dorm “Fred” she called up after him “Lia” he called out to her as the door shut hurt hit her in the chest Fred didnt come to see her off and George noticed it in her face “he’s just hurting Artie” he called to her holding her hand “Percy said to give this to you. Early Christmas gift” George smiled sympathetically “George i cant tell him right now” she cried softly “i can tell him after i turn fourteen. Not before its.. its” “shhh Artie-tartie. Its okay, youre going to miss the train. Go” he smiled at her she nodded “Fred” George called out walking back into the room “she can tell you after she turns fourteen” George continued and his eyes widened “what did she mean by that?” He asked “fourteen shes free” his eyes widened 

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She groaned as she pulled herself to a wall trying not to pass out seeing the bone in her thigh poking out of the skin she puts her hands on opposite sides pressing it together and popping the bone back in her vision blurring and fading in and out of consciousness breathing hard flashing into Dobby’s room sighing out as she lays face first on the floor “ARTIE!” Dobby called out “im fine Dobby just get me my potions” she whimpered Artemis groans at the pain in her torso as she pulls her self up from her bed in Dobby’s quarters she pulls off her shirt seeing the broken bones protruding through her skin but not quite breaking it black bruising around her eyes sides arms and thighs scatter throughout her body making her whimper at the air that blows on her skin ‘this ought to teach you a lesson you filthy cunt’ Lucious yelled as the cane came down faster she covers up in the biggest hoodie and sweat pants she owns groaning as she takes her trunk and Dracos trunk out to the car slowly sliding into her spot Lucious flicks his wand sending her flying into a nearby wall she groans out in pain hearing the bones in her chest crack on impact ‘still not crying yet are yoy? We’ll see how long that lasts’ he sneered as he cracked his neck pointing his wand at her ‘crucio’ Lucious yelled when Draco opens the door “Looks like father punished you good. Too bad he didn’t  kill you. What would those filthy blood traitors you call friends do then?” He sneers with a slight chuckle “one day Draco. The real you will come out and I will help you. The person your dad wants you to be and the person you really are are two different beings I know that theres good in you I can see it. But Lucious’s claws are buried so deep into you you cant even see it” she said softly to him as he scoffed her hand went to touch the phial of unicorn tears that hung lowly around her neck just between her collar bones ‘thats right take it’ his grip tightened over her throat closing her airway the other hand pinning both over her head ‘not going to make a sound are you little girl’ he growled in her ear licking the shell of it after loading the trunks into the train she slowly made her way to their empty carriage and ran her fingers over the carved letters C.W F.W G.W L.J A.B “theres no way im hiding this from them now” she sighs as the tears come out of her eyes in full force her hand tracing over the F blood poured out of her nose as he hit her again with a barbed belt her nose felt broken from being slammed into a wall as she held on to the wooden posts that she was tied to as he kept lashing away at her back she just stared forward not looking moving or making a sound as the cracks came down harder and faster when she limps out of the train Hagrid turns to greet her “Artemis!” He says with a big smile on his face when he actually sees her his face goes blank she gives him a tight lipped smile making her way to the great hall half way there the cuts along her back rip open due to how much she had been stumbling ‘worthless house elf cant do anything right’ his voice rang through her ears as she drifted in and out of consciousness over and catching her self on the jagged walls of the castle she pushes the door open and stumbles again leaning off to the side breathing heavily tightly skrewing her eyes shut to cope with the pain surging through her body when she finally opens her eyes she makes eye contact with George who had been smiling when he finally caught a glimpse of his best friend his eyes went wide

“George…” she whispered out seeing him grip Freds shoulder making him look to his twin who’s eyes were glued on her the chatter of the small group of friends stop as they see the terror on Georges face Freds eyes meet hers and a flash of anger comes over him Hermione and himself stand up and rush over to her he takes her face in his hands looking over her blackened eyes and split lip “Lia? You okay?” He coos in a soft but hard voice “what happened are you okay?” Hermione asks her she nods “Its not as bad as it looks I just want to go to our dorm” she said to Hermione with tears in her eyes that refused to fall “come on let me help you” Harry said as he comes up to her and places a hand on the back of her shoulder she yelps in pain lunging forward into Freds chest balling his vest into her hands he looked down at her confused “Artemis whats wrong?”he asked looking over to George as she shuts her eyes tight again starting to shake from the impact of Harrys hand. Harry looked at her with a weird look and back at his hand “Guys” was all he said as he saw her blood coating his hand “Artie… take off your jacket” Hermione said softly she lifts up slowly from Fred zipping the zipper down she looks over to Hermione “Mione I need help” she whispered as she started to tug the garment over Hermiones hands came to assist her once the jacket was off the thin white camisole that she wore under the jacket was seeping red with blood and they could see her bruises and broken bones “this is worse thank it looks Artemis!” Hermione whisper yelled at her Freds jaw tightens looking at her in such a frail state the anger in his eyes were scarce as he picks her up Bridal style “I dont give a shit if we’re in the middle of fighting right now Kahalialaulani. youre going to Madame Pomfreys right now im taking you and you cant fucking stop me youre hurt and you need me. I will never turn my back on you.” and rushes her to the hospital wing before bolting out the door he glances to his brothers “George Percy write mum get her down here RIGHT FUCKING NOW Ron get Migonigal.”  running out of the room with Hermione and Harry following him “MADAME POMFREY!” Fred yells as he slams the hospital wing doors open

“MADAME POMFREY I NEED HELP ITS AN EMERGENCY!” Fred yells again as he holds her body close to his she whimpers he looks down at her in his arms the blood seeping through his school uniform “WHAT IS ALL THAT RACKET!” She yells back taking her eyes from her tray from the back room to Fred with a limp Artemis in his hands the tray that she was holding drops to the ground “GOOD HEAVENS ARTEMIS!” She yells as she quickly sets up a room “Fred stand her up over here we need to get these clothes off. Boys wait outside Hermione you too!” She said Artemis quickly grabs her roommates hand “no please please stay with me” she pleads softly with Pomfrey she gives her a nod “Mione help” she said as she gestured to her shirt Mione softly pulls the shirt off of her head Hermione gasps at her naked top seeing the full extent of her injuries that extend under her bra the bruises that litter her body in various stages of healing she pulls down her sweat pants and hands them to Hermione as she helps Artie into bed covering her  “shes ready Madame Pomfrey” Hermione calls from the inside of the curtained make shift room when Minerva and Molly Weasley enter the hospital wing in the middle of Poppy examining her “Oh Artemis…” Molly sighs as Migonigal dismisses Hermione she reluctantly looked to Artemis not wanting to leave “Hermione dear, could you please go check on Fred before he combusts. I will be right here for her” Molly coos Artemis gives her a reassuring hand squeeze and nod Poppy nodded to her asking silently to take off her underwear while closing the blinds finishing up her examination she opens the curtains and pulls up the blanket giving Molly and Minerva a stern look not hearing Fred walk into the room Artemis’s quiet voice breaks the silence “Madame Pomfrey do you have…. can i have a contraceptive? lucious… when he….. he wasnt… he didnt…. it hurt so bad i heard it rip.. i got it to stop bleeding for a little bit… i dont want anything to… i cant get.. please just give me something to stop everything…. I was never on anything” she tears coming to her eyes. But refusing to fall when Migonigal sees her struggling Migonigal hugs her tightly

Molly sees red they only notice Fred in the room when he punches the wall “im going to kill him” they all turn to Fred she whimpers out his name “Fred” like seeing him was the straw that broke the camels back the tears freely flowed as he turned around to leave the hospital wing when he got to the door hand gripping the door handle a loud sob wracked through her throat that was his name “Freddie” he and the rest looked at her eyes spilling with tears fear and pain written in her features “Freddie no don’t no no no don’t leave me please don’t leave me here” she sobs trying to leave the bed  frozen to his spot Migonigal pushes her down slightly the fear and pain spread across her features as she landed on the bed she thrashed to get up seeing her freak out over him leaving melted his anger “please Freddie please don't leave i don't want to be alone don’t leave me here I cant be alone… please just stay… i… i need you” she quickly gets out stuttering in fear and sobs as they look at her in shock everything he was doing. Stops.  never hearing her sound like that or her use his nickname when she was fully awake and alert in the entirety of them knowing eachother she cries she holds out her hand for him to take reluctantly she hissed as she moved over in the cot for him he looked in her eyes asking for permission she nods he took it and hopped into her cot gently holding her “shhhhh love. Im here… i’m here… i wont leave… i’m sorry…. Im not leaving… i’ll stay….. i’ll stay with you… you’re okay… its okay… it’ll be okay…. Stop crying i’m here for you….. shhhh”  he whispers into her hair rubbing her back he looks up at his mom as she looks down at him Molly looks at the pair seeing her visibly relax in his arms “how bad is it Poppy?” Minerva asks after the girl had left the wing “Minnie its bad. She has a broken eye socket, her nose is broken in three places her collar bone on the left side had been completely shattered she has ten fractured ribs a dislocated shoulder four of her right fingers are broken all of her finger nails are missing she has a broken Femur her spine has been fractured she was whipped with a black magic whip shes lost a lot of blood and those are just the minor injuries. Shes been ripped Minerva. Ripped worse than what ive seen in child birth and her pelvis is shattered.” Poppy concluded “I dont know how shes alive right now let alone walking.” She said softly

“Let me bring her home to the burrow I can help her heal and recover there” Molly asked as Minerva looked to Poppy “do you have anything strong enough for her pain or do we have to bring her to st. Mungos?” Minerva asks “just heal it i’ll be fine” they all look at Artemis “heavens Artie are you sure?” She asks “nothing could hurt worse than getting them” she says as poppy nods “Mr. Weasley i’ll need you out of bed so i can heal her but you can stay in here.” Pomfrey says as he nods holding her hand gingerly she points her wand at Artemis’s forehead and makes her way down Artemis starts to groan the lower she gets Molly takes hold of her other hand “scream dear squeeze as hard as you need too i can take it love. I promise” she coos as she plays with Artemis’s hair she yelps when Poppy gets to her waist and legs 

she brings Fred’s hand to her forehead he kneels down by her bed side stroking her hair “Good girl Artie.. its okay. I know it hurts love. Im here im right here squeeze my hand baby girl. Youre okay” he whispered into her hair as he places his forehead on hers “hey…. Look at me.. look in my eyes” he softly whispers to her her breath hard and labored as she forces her eyes open looking at Fred in front of her he places the hand he was holding on his shoulder “youre okay” he softly smiles at her she lets go of Mollys hand putting it around his other shoulder looking at him  “i’ve got you” he said “almost through. Her femur is giving me a little trouble as it had already set wrong we may need to break and re set it again” Poppy spoke up Artemis released his shoulder and pointed at her leg muttering a spell that snapped het bone in the same place Lucious did biting her lip a closed mouth scream left her throat as she squeezed her arm tighter around the back of his neck “son of a bitch” she let out breathlessly looking up to Fred again with tears in her eyes his eyes soften meeting her gaze “Heavens Artemis!” Molly screeched again “just please get this over with” she said loud Fred moved his hand to her face bringing her chin up to look at him again “youre so strong.. let me be strong for you… im right here Artie and im not leaving you..” he cooed again she closes her eyes and lets the tears slip from her eyes wiping her cheeks with the rough pad of his thumb “he looks over his shoulder to madame Pomfrey who nods back at him “almost done love. Almost done” he coos Molly raises her eyebrow to her son he looks up at her “shes our best friend mum” he mumbles “i wasn’t insinuating anything Freddie” she smiles down at him “youre a good boy Fred” she shook her head as the rest of the adults went into the corner of the room she moves over for Fred in the cot he drapes his arms carefully over her pulling her into a tight hug she leans her head on his shoulder shutting her eyes for a minute “freddie” she whispers he looks down to her “its okay love.. rest i’ll be here when you get up”  Fred kisses the top of her head as she relaxes in his arms much like second year “she is not going back to that house” Molly chimed “Shes coming home with the boys over summer. Thats final.” Molly insisted “we must get the aurors involved this cant go unseen. Lucious and Narcissa should be jailed!” Poppy exclaimed when Albus and Narcissa Malfoy come into the room Narcissa making a bee line to Artemis who passed out in Freds arms Fred raising his wand to her pulling Artemis closer to him 

“STOP! STOP RIGHT THERE” Fred raises his voice the adults snapping their attention to the door “you touch her? And i will kill you myself. Artemis will never be hurt by you ever again” he growls at Narcissa with glowing eyes filled with anger Molly comes up in front of her son “Minerva, shes Fourteen. She has legally become an adult shes free to go back to Grimmuald place her birth right” Narcissa spoke up “shes got control of half of her moms Vault AND full control of Walburga Blacks vault. Shes free” Narcissa speaks to Minerva and Poppy “i tried to stop him. I tried. He… ive been trying to get her out of here since the first hit.. i owe a life debt to her mother.” Narcissa said in hurt “just let me see her” she pleaded with Molly “i have her mothers journals and everything she was supposed to get when she turned fourteen” she screamed slightly “aunt… aunt Cissy?” She called out drearily as she reached her hand out to her “oh thank heavens Artie” she kneels down by her bed side “aunt cissa im sorry i couldnt… i couldnt not come here” she started to cry “shut up Artie. This was never your fault. Never you hear me?” She coos brushing her hair out of her face “youre going to take this” she hands her a shrunken bag “and ive put some galleons whatever He wouldnt notice in the front pocket. Youre going to go find your brother. Bring him back, take care of eachother and you’ll go back to grimmuald place. Youre Free love. You made it to fourteen. No more house elf chores. No more reprimands. No more fear. Or lack of food. You can live your life the way your mom and dad envisioned for you and Apollo” she sighs out “ive got to go before he catches me here. Youll be alright?” She asks looking into her eyes she holds out her hand for Narcissa to take she puts her hand on her cheek showing her images of reassurance “i love you dear” she kisses her forehead “shes not living on her own shes just a girl! Shes coming home with my boys at the end of term!” Molly insisted “Mrs. Weasley its okay” Artemis said “Kreacher will take care of me.” She said sitting up slowly “YOURE coming home with Fred and George. No ands ifs or buts.” “Im not going to be a burden” she said stubbornly “i have Grimmuald place. I’ll be okay” she tried to reason with Molly “one summer. Youll stay one summer. And if you want to leave after the next term. I wont fight you” Molly compromised

“one summer?” She asked Molly “one summer.” She nodded “okay.” She sighed out “im not leaving her” Fred looked over to the adults after she passed out again. “Im staying here” he said firmer Poppy and Minerva look at each other sharing a smile “i dont see an issue with that Mr. Weasley” Poppy informed him Molly smiled “shes something special isnt she Fred” Molly asked her son “i… mom its not like..” “calm down Freddie” she chuckled “i really like her too” molly cooed brushing his hair put of his face A month later Fred and Artemis were sitting in bed “Fred im okay. You can leave you know” “im staying Artemis. Besides youd be bored without me here” he jests “George has been feeding the animals. He says Kalama finally stopped shooting hot water at him” he looks at her “i know you want to know Fred” she sighs out “i do. But i wont push you on it i dont want to fight again we’re finally okay, i almost lost you because i couldn’t wait. Im sorry i pushed it before.” she looks up to him his hazel eyes meeting her golden eyes “i’ll show you” she sighs out “promise me, promise me that you wont look at me different” she looked down “promise me nothing changes” she starts to nervously crack under his gaze “i promise” he holds out his pinky she smiles taking it he grabs her hand placing it on his cheek “show me the real you Artemis” he breathes out she takes a deep breath and looks into his eyes showing him her entire life she tore down walls that she built up and gave him her trust she stopped just before winter break “i…. I dont know if i should…” he holds her hand on his face “i want to know Artie.. show me” he says in a soft comforting voice she plays the memory in his head. He drops her hand from his face looking up at her with tears in his eyes “you promised” she said softly as he shed a single tear “how.. howd you not cry or scream through any of that” she shrugged “didnt want to give him the satisfaction” she sighed leaning on the headboard “can i give you a hug?” He asks cautiously “geez Fred im not broken if you want to hug me hug me act as normally as possible” she was cut off as he pulled her into him by the collar of her shirt “im so sorry you had to endure all if it” he whispered “im here for you you can trust me. You dont have to be strong around me i will catch you when ever you fall Artemis. You can lean on me” he rubbed up her back in a comforting hug tears came to her eyes as he spoke out to her “let it out love. Let it all out” she started to sob into his chest

“i have you. Thats it give it all to me. All the pain and hurt fear. I’ll take all of it for you, Artemis” he cooed as she started to scream into his chest he laid against the head board as Molly walked in “how long has she been asleep?” She asked softly “shes been out for about an hour” he sighed as he ran his fingers through her hair “she cried a lot, finally getting it all out” he sighed “do you two need anything?” Molly asked “could you get me another shirt?” He asked “of course dear” Molly said with a smile when she came back George and Harry come in “hey mum when did you get here?” George asked “just got here love. Came to check on Artemis” she said softly “Freddie go shower.” George said putting a hand on his shoulder “i’ll stay with her. Go take a shower. Five minutes tops. She’ll be fine” George nudges his shoulder he nods slipping out of bed he leans down kissing her forehead “i’ll be right back Artie. I promise” he coos She stirred awake seeing George sitting on the bed with her holding her hand with Molly and Harry sitting next to the bed “hey, morning sleepy head” George cooed “your animals are fine, i think Igneous misses you. Your Kelpie is getting big, and Kamaile stopped pecking my head everytime i go to feed him” he laughed “thank you for doing that George” she smiled softly at him “no issue. Youd do the same for me” he smiled she looked up at Harry and Molly “hey kid… how are you doing?” She asked Harry “shouldnt i be asking you that?” Harry gives her an empathetic smile “im alright. Hes been keeping me company” she shrugged “he went to take a shower. He should be back soon” Molly chimed in “ive been trying to get him to leave for days. I feel bad for keeping him here” she looked up at Molly  who just smiled at her “some people are worth staying for Fred made it clear that he was staying to all of the adults. Let him stay” she said as she brushed her hair out “hows your pain?” She asked gently “my leg hurts. But Poppy said its normal” she said softly “my back doesnt bother me much anymore, still havent gotten used to the scarring. But im sure that that will come later.” She shrugged. “Any nightmares?” Molly asked “all the time. But Fred wakes me when they happen” she smiles  “Charlie asked if you needed him to come back from Romania” she mentioned “as much as id love to see Charlie i wont ask him to uproot his life for me” she smiled at Molly “besides i have Fred George Ron Harry and Hermione constantly here. Hes not missing much. I will request his presence in the event i ever give birth though” she joked “you want kids?” George asked “i want a big family some day.” She looked at George who smiled “kids are fun. Im good with them.” She continued “i didnt know that” George smiled “yeah, i guess when you grew up like me… you want the things you never had when you can give them to yourself” she smiled “here. I got this for you. Or well. I had Molly get it” she said as she leaned over to the side table “its for feeding my pets” she said handing George the Honeydukes sweets and Zonkos toys “you didnt have to” he said “just take the sweets George.” She rolled her eyes at him “hey. Dont be like that” he jested “so how much longer are you in here for?”  Harry asked her grabbing her hand in his “i dont know kid. Until my hip and pelvis heals i assume” she said smiling at him “these things take time” she sighed “you can always come back to the burrow you know. Arthur and i would love to have you.” “I cant impose. Thank you Molly for the offer. But i cant” “of course you can!” She said with a small smile “Charlie already said you could have his room if you needed it” she looked at her “mum. She said no” Fred walked back in with damp hair. 

Dont push her. Shes been through more than she’s let on.” he said walking back over to the bed “she’ll open up when shes ready, in the mean time ive got this. I got her. Shes in great hands. Trust me i’ll do you proud mum” he sighed out “i never doubted you Freddie. I like this side of you” she smiles at him as she stood up George moving from his spot for Fred Fred shook his head at George who just relaxed “Migonigal gave me our work for the week” he said sitting at the foot of the bed “said to call her when we’re ready to take the quiz” he said softer she nodded “thank you Fred” she nudged his leg with her foot giving him a genuine smile “if youre going to stay here with me for the entire time. Promise me youll take care of yourself. That means going to meals, and shower. Let Harry and my other friends come and see me get out of your head if not for you but for me. You must be losing your mind worrying about me” she gave him a smile “if you can do that i want you to stay” “i can compromise.” He said “one hour to myself. Just one hour and im back here but George needs to stay with you while im not” he says looking at her intently “one hour” she nodded “and George stays?” He raises an eyebrow expectantly at her “fine. George stays” she rolls her eyes ‘i care about you Artemis’ he thought to himself as he ran a hand through his hair looking at George “youll stay with her?” He asked with worried eyes “like youd even have to ask Freddie. I’ll stay with her. Go get some rest. We’ll see you in an hour” George said Once George and Artemis was alone “please dont hurt him Artie” he whispered she cocked her eyebrow at him “George…. I… i think im in love with him why would i hurt him?” George smiled at her “i dont think he realizes how much he effects me… how much ive changed because of him… i dont want to hurt him i want to make him happy and proud” she sighs out looking down “you dont realize how much youve changed my brother. Hed softer with you.” He holds her hand “i dont think he feels the same” “and i know he does. Boys tend to be slower with their feelings Artemis” he smiled “i dont think so.” She smile

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“and just where do you think youre going?” Artemis raises an eyebrow to her room mate “Harry and Ron think that Snape is trying to get the sorcerers stone. We found a trap door” “yeah. No. Youre not going alone” she sighs out as she grabs a jumper “you just got out of the hospital wing!” “Yeah. You Harry and Ron are going to get yourselves killed. Im coming with you.” “Fred is going to kill me” she shook her head “are you really still stuck on this?” Artemis rolls her eyes “whats going on with you and Ron anyway i thought you had a thing for George?” She asks pulling the jumper over her head her cheeks go bright red “its nothing. nothing. Hurry up lets go” she said in a hurry “alright alright. You win” Artemis said following her out of the room getting down to the common room to meet Harry and Ron Ron rolls his eyes “Mione you werent supposed to tell her!” Ron said in an annoyed tone “she didnt have to tell me. She hangs around with you two. You two have been running a muck since you got here. Besides. You might want to have me around carrots.” she raised an eyebrow at him “i am good with animals. She told me about the three headed dog” she shook her head “FINE! JUST YOU THEN!” Ron screamed “you make like having me around is a bad thing Ronald.” she jests “no. Its not but where ever you are my brothers are and i dont need them following us!” He said draping the other end of the invisibility cloak on Harry and Hermione “Artie?” Fred asked as he walked down the stairs “yeah?” She asked back “what are you doing?” He asked wiping the sleep from his eyes “nothing. Im okay go back to bed” she smiled as Ron snickered under the cloak she glared at them “what are you glaring at?” Ron makes the sound of a whip quietly

“You wanna go ahead and tell me how youre not whipped mr. I cant tell the girl i like how i feel cause shes so much smarter than me im just going to stare at her til she falls in love with me” Artemis yells at whats seemingly air Fred raises an eyebrow at her “ARTEMIS!” Rons voice yelled from under the cloak Fred pulls the cloak off of the trio “carrot head junior thinks im whipped” she puts her hand on her hip “and just where do you lot think youre going?” Fred raises an expectant eyebrow at his brother “we’re waisting time lets just go. We’ll explain on the way” Hermione said grabbing both their wrists tugging them under the invisibility cloak “NO! Im not letting you guys go! Last time you three snuck out we lost hpuse points!” A scared Neville said “im really sorry about this Neville” Hermione said sadly stunning him. They walk out Artemis and Ron still arguing silently “see. Whenever youre around so is he” Ron rolled his eyes “thats not my fault!” Artemis argues “how is it not your fault!” Ron whisper yelled “ughhhhh youre gonna get us caught carrots” she said following Hermione closely “honestly would you two stop fighting!” Hermione groans “Ron. Artemis is the only one of us who deals with animals. We have no idea what challenges we have once we open the door. The more of us there. The better” Hermione said as they walked up the stairs “besides. Can you please stop chastising my sister. Shes majority of the time right” Harry continues “ikkle Ronniekins needs to admit he was wrong” Fred jested making everyone laugh Hermione pointed her wand at the door “Alohomora” the lock unlocks as they all walk in “thats one big dog” Fred looks at Fluffy who was sleeping on the trap door “the harps playing. Thats where we need to go” Harry said moving his paw slightly “who’s going first?” Ron gulped we all shot him a glare “seriously Ronald!” Hermione whisper yelled when drool dropped onto Rons shoulder the five kids look up Fred Ron Harry and Hermione started to yell Artemis rose to her feet “well look at you” she said softly “youre a beautiful doggie arent you” she cooed reaching her hand up to the middle heads nose as it snapped at her “i know you wont hurt me” she raised an eyebrow at the dog “whats your name? Are you the protector of the stone?” She asked gently the dogs ears shifted to pointing back as it bowed his head to her ‘Hagrid calls me Fluffy i protect the stone.’ “Youre doing such a good job boy yeah whos a good boy” his tail starts to wag as the left head licked her cheek she giggled “alright alright Fluffy, me and my friends are trying to protect the stone too. We think someones trying to steal it, can we pass?” She asked petting the middle heads snout he barks “theres a steak with your name on it when we get back” she scratched behind the middle heads ear “maybe i can get Hagrid to tell me where he got you from” she laughed as he licked her face more “okay, lets go” she said looking back at the group who was staring at her in shock “hurry up before Fluffy eats you four” she ran in jumping into the trap door “how shes able to do that i dont know” Fred shook his head jumping in after her “hurry up!” He yelled back up to the other three “Hermione” Artemis asked “devils snare” she looked at the girl “what do we do?” Artemis asked her Hermione looked to her as she was deep in thought when the idea popped into her head a giant smile came to her face 

“we stay calm and relax” she said to her room mate “good job Granger five points.” Artemis nodded looking over to Fred giving him a small smile she relaxed her body and fell through with Hermione falling next to her “JUST RELAX BOYS” Hermione called from below Fred was the next to fall through followed by Harry who fell on his bum making Artemis laugh “graceful Harry” she jests “shut up” he laughs coming to stand inbetween her and Hermione “hes not relaxing is he” she shook her head casting a spell light killed the devils snare around Ron making him fall through on his back he meets all of their eyes “next time.” Artemis starts “listen to your friend. And relax” she told him leaning all her weight on her left leg “sorry Hermione” Ron said with a blush “lets go” she said to the group pushing forward to a room with a broom floating and keys with wings flying “which one is the key?” Hermione asked as Artemis and Harry make contact with the one key with the broken wing “its that one” they say at the same time she turns to harry “okay. Chosen one” Artemis says holding out a fist “what are they doing?” Fred asked Hermione “theyre playing rock paper scissors to see who gets the key since they both saw it at the same time” she whispered to Fred “whats rock paper scissors?” “Just watch!” Hermione snapsHarry mimics Artemis “Rock, Paper, Scissors. Shoot!” They say together Artemis holding out scissors Harry holding out rock he smashes her scissors and smiles “basically who wins is safe the loser has to do the task” Hermione explains “its a muggle thing” she shrugs “yeah yeah. Whatever chosen one” she playfully rolls her eyes at him mounting the broom “you know i was going to try out for seeker last year” she tells him as she kicks off “really?” He asked “yeah. But i changed my mind. I wanted to take care of magical creatures” she said zooming up into the keys that started to make shallow cuts throughout her body chasing after the broken winged key once she got it she flew back down and handed the key to Harry “you okay?” Fred asks taking her arm in his hand “perfect” she smiled at him “it was fun” as Hermione healed her “Thanks Mione” she said as they walked into the next room to where a giant chess board is “what do we do now?” Fred asked “Hermione you stand where the castle is, Fred you take the second castle on the other side Harry. Artemis where the bishops are. I will play knight” he said as he hopped on to the horse. “D5!” Ron yelled as the piece moved up Ron continued to play the game getting Artemis and Harry to the other side “hes going to sacrifice himself!” “RON NO YOU CANT!” Both Hermione and Fred yell at the same time

“Harry, Artemis its you two that have to go on. Not me. Not Fred. Not Hermione. You and Artemis.” He said as the chess piece moved knocking him on conscious “lets go Harry” “OI!” Fred calls out to Harry and Artemis “You protect her you hear me Potter?! Do not let her out of your sight!” Fred yelled from his position “with my life Fred. I’ll protect her with my life” Harry said “lets go” Artemis rolled her eyes “i’ll be fine Freddie i promise” she said shooting him a smile he nods “we’ll be back.” She called as they ran through the doors “well now what? We need to check on him” Fred said as he tried to move on the board but got held back by the piece next to him “you tell Ron about George yet? Or are you still stuck between two of the finest Weasley men available” Fred asked Hermione casually while standing in his square “you ever going to tell Artemis youre in love with her?” “Im not in love with her” “you protect her Potter!” Hermione mimics “just because i care about her doesnt mean that im in love with her!” Fred scowled “but your actions prove it” Hermione stuck her tongue out at him “to answer your question no. I didnt tell ron about George. Or George about Ron. Im not sure exactly” her cheeks heated up “i dont think that theres anything their” she said softly “there is.” Fred reassured her “theres something there with Ron too.” He juts his chin to his knocked out brother “just dont hurt them okay?” He said rolling his eyes “i can say the same thing about you and Artemis” she smiled softly at him “she really is like a sister to me. Shes helped me more than i like to admit” Hermione sighed out “i dont know what i feel” Fred admits as he sits in his square “when shes around. Shes…” “suffocating. Like if youre not around her its hard to breathe? Like shes home?” Hermione asked sitting facing him his cheeks heat up as he slowly nods

“and i dont want to tell her that because im afraid shes going to want more… and i hurt her accidentally.” Hermione gave him a sympathetic smile “isnt that her decision to make? Artemis is a smart girl. She should know if youre as close as you say you two are” She asked in a soft voice “im not ready to lose her completely” he sighed out “its better if she finds someone better. Less cowardly. Someone who deserves her. And i make due with what i have” Fred sighs out before Hermione could speak he changed the subject “her boggart was Lucious standing over George Charlie and i dead. When she told me what happened over winter break. He threatened her with us. And she was so scared of it that its her boggart. Anyway. While she was being held screaming pleading with Lucious not to…. While the boggart mimicked her screams. She ran out of the room. Those screams haunted us for days. George took care of the Boggart and i ran after her she wouldnt talk for a week. All she did was correspond with Charlie. Charlie was so worried he recruited Bill and the three of them kept talking throughout the week. She just sat there. Staring at the wall” he said to the air. “Im scared that that was something more, that im something more to her.” “You are something more to her Fred. You should hear the way she talks about you when we’re alone. You got her out of her shell.” Hermione said gently “and its nothing to be afraid of. You deserve to love. And be loved. You both do i think you both will be good for each other” “when the time is right perhaps. Now isnt the time shes still… i want her to heal before i throw myself into the mix. I want her to be alright with herself. I dont want to manipulate her in anyway. Shape. Or form. I want it to be pure from the start. Cause thats what she deserves.” He sighs out “thats just it though Fred. Youre in love with the bad parts of her, thats the purest type of love there is or atleast thats what i get from the novels i read. You say you dont want to manipulate or pressure her and youre not youre supporting her. Its been pure from the start. just promise me i get to be the god mother of your kids and im her maid of honor at the wedding” Hermione jests “you ever going to tell George or Ron you fancy him?” He asks “i dont know how i feel to be honest with you. He…. Im.. im not…” she stutters “believe me when i say. Hes smitten. You have nothing to worry about.” Fred looks back to his younger brother “and dont worry about what he’d say. Its not his choice who you choose. Its yours.” he sighed out. “I get to be your man of honor at your wedding though. And your first sons middle name is Frederick. You better pick a flattering dress for my figure” they both laughed

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Harry and Artemis push their way into the room and see professor Quirrell in the mirror of Erised she puts her arm out in front of Harrys chest “i dont like this Harry” she whispered out “HARRY GET BACK!” She yells as Quirrell attacks Harry he gets her by her neck as he leans over her “you my dear. Will be useful in the future. Child of destiny Your blood line is a great one” he sneers as she fights his grip “GET THE STONE HARRY!” She yelled he grabs it “he flicks his wand and Quirrell flies off of her she choked on air as it filled her lungs she stood up as they began dueling with their professor after Harry had defeated Quirrell he looked to artemis who was bleeding from a gash on her head “you alright?” He asked “as fine as i’ve ever been” she smiled lightly at him he nods “need help?” She asks “yeah. I think my ankles broken” he says hissing to stand up “okay. Lets go get the others” she smiles slinging a hand over her shoulder “come on chosen one. Lets go” she smiles “whatever you say child of Destiny” he rolled his eyes as she slowly led them out of the room “HARRY ARTEMIS! Thank goodness!” Hermione yelled as she ran to them engulfing them into a hug Ron following not too long after. He tackled Harry into a hug “Mione.. Ronnie. easy. We just defeated an evil traitor you know” Artemis jested he slings an arm over Hermiones shoulder “go to him. He’s burning a hole through your head with his eyes” Harry whispers into her ear she nods slowly walking up to Fred “see? I told you i would be fine” she smiles looking up into his eyes he grabs her face in his hands looking at the gash “its just a cut. One healing potion and it should be fine” she smiled up at him  “Artemis i want to say something to you. But i dont want you to be scared off. But i just want to tell you f thats okay” she looked at him cocking her head

“Freddie you can tell me anything” she said softer he leans in slightly blush creeping onboth their cheeks she looks down at his lips and back up to his eyes as he leans in when he started to speak again “Artie i…” he got cut off when Dumbledore Minerva Hagrid and Snape entered the room “WHY IS IT THAT WHENEVER SOMETHING HAPPENS ITS YOU FOUR AND ONE OF THE TWINS OR BOTH!” Minerva yelled “ive been asking myself this since they got here Minnie” Artemis shook her head Albus looked at her and Harry before asking for a moment alone healing both of their wounds. “Thank you sir” Artie tells him as he apparates them to his office “Mr. Potter the stone please” he said cautiously Harry hands him the stone “sir… did we do something wrong?” Harry asked cautiously “no. Children you did nothing wrong, quite the opposite really.” Harry and Artemis walk to the great hall and sit next to their friends “you wanted to tell me something Fred?” She asked “im glad youre alright” his blush returning to his cheeks Slytherin banners hanging from the poles as they chatted “so what did Dumbledore want to talk to you?” Fred asked “oh. Nothing. I’ll tell you when we get home” she smiled at him ‘home’ he thought with reddened cheeks “its only for the summer. But i doubt that Molly wont be dragging you back and forth from my place” she shrugged looking at Fred “i just dont want to burden your family” she smiled softly “Artemis. Youre not a burden. My family loves you. Hell. Ron and you already fight like siblings, Charlie and Bill call you their sister and you have Ginny completely Smitten with you” Fred rolled his eyes “stay longer than summer. Stay with us…. Me… stay with me” he says softly “Freddie… i… i want too.. i really do…” “but you cant” he looked down with sad eyes “hey… I’ll just be a Floo away. Youre still my best friend and i dont know what id do without you” she smiled taking his face in her hands “ALRIGHT! I have some last minute awards!” Albus said “Miss Hermione Granger, for the cool use of intellect when others were in great peril, 50 points.“ “Miss Artemis Black, for wondrous courage and sacrifice in the face of fear. 10 points” “Mr. Fred Weasley, for protecting those you hold dear. 5 points” “Mr. Ronald Weasley, for the best played game of chess that Hogwarts has seen these many years, 50” “to Mr. Harry Potter, for pure nerve and outstanding courage, I award Gryffindor House 60 points.” “And finally, it takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends, I award 10 points, to Mr. Neville Longbottom. Assuming that my calculations are correct, I believe a change in decoration is in order. Gryffindor wins the house cup! Congratulations house of the lion!” Dumbledore congratulates as applause erupted from every table but Slytherin after we were released walking to the train station “I hope you enjoyed that Filthy orphan. Must be nice being fawned over! Hopefully Father got your blood out of the living room rug.” Draco spats as he shoves between Harry and Artemis who were walking with linked arms along with Hermione Lee and Ron with Fred and George following behind them “leave her alone Malfoy” Harry said letting go of her arm and pushing her behind him and into Lee “Yeah Malfoy leave Artie alone she didnt do anything wrong” Lee told the three boys who were trying to tower over her pushing her to Fred and George “and just what are you going to do about it Potter! Pathetic how you have first years protecting you dont you think?”

“Him? Hes going to do Nothing. Me? Im going to do This.” Artemis said turning him into a mouse and stomping her feet trying to but not trying to crush him she laughs. Then walks away as it scurried around once she was on the train she snapped her fingers and Malfoy turned back to normal “wicked” Fred and George said simultaneously “its creepy how you two can do that.” She and Harry said at the same time “now thats just wrong” George said with a shudder while Artemis and harry fist bumped each-other “do you know how long we’ve been practicing that?!” He said they all laughed “honestly you two need to give us more credit we’ve been practicing since i (she) got back from winter break” they say together again “stop! Thats creepy when you and harry do it!” George yells “Do what George? We’re not doing anything.” Harry and Artemis tilt their head to the left Fred just laughing at them “alright chosen one and child of destiny. Sit down before you give George a heart attack” Fred laughs “did you guys script this out?” Lee asks as Fred sits next to her in the middle of the bench “no. We didnt. Not at first” Artemis started “but then we thought itd be fun to prank Fred and George” Harry said sitting next to Fred nearest the door “so we planned it and now we’re here” Artie said “and its quite fun speaking like this” Harry said smiling “i think we’re going to keep doing it” Artie and Harry say together with a smile “its actually a charm Artemis came up with. With you two in mind” Harry said “we call it the insync” they say together as Artemis pulls out her wand undoing the charm “Finite” she whispered smiling “you are a brilliant” Fred breathes out slinging an arm over her shoulders pulling her into him for a side hug “teach us later?” George asks “why? You guys are already insync.” “Yeah. But imagine if we get Charlie in on this how creepy that would be for mum and dad” George laughed she smirked “fine. Only if im captain when we play quidditch back at the burrow” she muses leaning her head on the window watching the trees.

  “Guys, i think shes asleep” Harry said as he leaned up to look at her “she is, she usually sleeps while on the train.” George smiles lightly “she’ll be alright with you three then?” Harry asks “shes always alright with us Potter. We’ve been with her since our first year” Lee said with a soft smile “we’d die before we’d let anything happen to our Artemis. Some more so than others” lee insinuated while looking at Fred who unconsciously put his hand on her thigh not listening to the conversation “OI” harry whisper yelled Fred snapping his head to his direction “youre good for her, like really good for her. Protect her Weasley. Do not let her out of your sight. Protect my god sister.” he smiles as he walked out of the cabin Fred smiled “with my life Potter” he sighed “with my life” he looked over to her Harry smiled and into the one with Ron and Hermione “he’s right you know.” Lee commented “what are you on about Lee?” Fred asks “she told me about Lucious after you two got out of the hospital wing before the boggart in defense against the dark arts. She cried on my lap because you were sleeping and didnt want me to wake you. She asked me to pet her hair and let her cry” He continued “she wouldve never done that before” he sighed out “she said her nightmare woke her up and she needed someone when she came to our room she saw you two sleeping and me reading in bed. i said ‘okay, lets go downstairs’ she sat next to me and put her head on my lap and started to cry. ‘It was Lucious again’ she said her voice hoarse from crying Lees hand came to her hair as she closed her eyes just playing with the soft curls ‘i was back in the dungeons and he flung me into the wall again… i felt my leg snap… the heat of the crucio…” she said softer to him ‘youre safe Artie. Im here for you. We all are do you want me to wake Fred up?’ Lee asked ‘no…. I just got out of the hospital wing he’ll drag me back there and this is the first time hes actually asleep not pretending to sleep so he could watch me to wake me up’ she said as tears spilled down her face ‘wanna talk about it somemore?’ He asked softer ‘i feel so broken this shouldnt be effecting me so much’ she said ‘love. Listen to me.

Its effecting you the right amount. You are traumatized and thats okay. Nightmares are okay’ Lee cooed ‘im sorry im putting all of this on you Lee’ she cried ‘hey. Youre my best friend too. This falls in that jurisdiction of best friend duties and if you need to lay in my lap while i play with your hair as you cry? Guess what we’re doing. Sitting here in front of the fire. Just like this while i play with your hair letting you cry’ ‘he was so close to killing me Lee… he almost used the curse’ she said softly ‘he almost used Avada’ Lee asked softly ‘he said he was going to invite the Weasleys over.. and make me watch… before killing me starting with the twins’ she cried he looked down at her ‘is that what your nightmares are about? Him getting the twins?’ She shook her head ‘mostly him getting Fred… he was the first person that ever got me to open up…the first person that told me i was pretty.. hes’ ‘hes our best friend youre more than pretty Artemis and you are worth it’ lee finished for her as she nodded ‘nothings going to happen to the Weasleys Artemis, youre safe. We’re all safe’ he smiled down at her ‘get some sleep please, i’ll carry you back to bed when youre asleep’ he smiled at her she nodded it wasnt just George and Charlie she was scared of losing. Its you. Youre who’s shes scared the most of losing” Lee told Fred shaking the memory from his head “you and her? are closer than you think you are” she lets put a sigh taking her head off the window and on to the back of the bench

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That summer she decided to write Apollo with Fred and George’s support of course ‘Dear Apollo,

I know its weird getting a letter from me six years after we’ve been separated, Happy late 14th birthday Kaneleo, i miss you more than words could explain. Good news i’ve inherited Grandma’s flat and legally i can care for the both of us. Mums trust is split and i got Grandmothers vault when i turned fourteen. You can choose, have uncle Jake bring you to me, or you can stay with him. I wont turn your life upside down. Im staying with my friends family for the summer on the insistence of their mom. But i plan to return to grandmas after next term. Write me back i wanna catch up baba. Even if its just through letters. I miss you. So much and I miss mum. And dad. Dad mostly. I still sing you dream on in my dreams. I hope your childhood was amazing, Love always,

Artemis

A red envelope landed in her lap from America George and Fred give her a sympathetic look as she tears the seal on the howler open taking a deep breath out fully expecting her brother to cuss her out Fred places his hand on her thigh squeezing it comfortingly 

ARTEMIS KAHALIALAULANI NALEOPILIMEHANA BLACK!

YOU HAVE SOME EXPLAINING TO DO OLD LADY! I WAKE UP AND YOU ARE NO WHERE TO BE FOUND!! HOW DARE YOU NOT SAY GOODBYE! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I CRIED OVER YOU! OF COURSE IM COMING BACK TO YOU YOU GIGANTIC LŌLŌ HEAD! IM GOING TO GUT YOU WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU YOURE MY TWIN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD HOW COULD YOU! He takes a deep breath I know Uncle and Aunty said that it was to protect me. But it did hurt Li’a of course I chose you. They say that its my choice and I want to stay with you. Uncle Jake will be bringing me back to England a week before term starts he wrote to Dumbledore to enroll me. I cant wait to see you! Aunt and Uncle had a son around our age three years younger than us his name is Rolf. Cool kid if you think about it i miss you way too much. Aunt Altair said that I remind her of mum. But whenever I think back to what mom looks like all I see is you. Me and you at Grandmas. We were just kids when she died, and you stepped up Uncle and Aunt are great… but their not you Lia. I need you back. He breathed out Ive included some pictures of the places we’ve been the animals we’ve seen. Reminds me of mums niffler that she kept in her bag. do you still have her bag? And what was with you around Christmas time? I had to ice my left leg for a month! Uncle Rolf and Aunt Altair cant wait to see you as well they asked to ask where to bring me. Let me know please Lia AND IF YOU EVER DISAPPEAR AGAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY BEAR HANDS YOU HEAR ME!!! SEE YOU IN TWO AND A HALF MONTHS!

                           Apollo

Molly walked into the living room as the red envelope tore itself up “you okay love?” Fred asked “hes coming?” She asked with tears in her eyes “hes really coming?” Tears falling down her face “thats what he yelled” George smiled at her “what was all that racket!” She yelled “oh Mrs. Weasley im sorry, that was my brother. Is it okay if he comes to stay for the last week of summer? Or we could go back to Grimmuald place” she said looking down “are you kidding? Of course he can stay. I’ll put a bed in mine and Fred’s room” George rolled his eyes “its Family Artemis” he rolled his eyes leaving the room Molly just smiled “its no issue dearey” she smiled 

Hey Lia bug

its great that you and your brother are finally corresponding, im glad he wants to come stay with you its nice knowing that you wont be alone in that house next summer. Before you ask Romania is wonderful. Theres this girl from Oahu thats staying in my cabin. Her name is Haukea. But she goes by snow. Its funny how that worked out. Shes funny and amazing with the dragons. I think youd like her. Bill came to visit as well hes worried about you. Wanted you to write him. Have you told mum about Apollo yet? Dont tell anyone but im planning on coming home at the end of summer to see Ginny off. That includes the twins hopefully Apollos there when i get there it would be nice to meet him. 

                            Charlie

Apollo,

The place im staying at is in Devon. With the Weasley family Molly says its alright for you to come at the end of summer i cant wait for you to meet everyone especially Fred and George followed by Harry Hermione Ron and Ginny, youll probably be rooming with Fred and George when you get here. Theyre twins like us! And great people. Hows things going over in america? Are you having fun? We played quidditch yesterday and i knocked George off his broom getting the golf ball we used for a snitch. We won against him and Ron. Ron wasnt too happy about losing. Maybe aunt Altair and Uncle Jacob can play a round before they leave back to america. I cant wait to see you. Just a couple of weeks left baby baba

                     Artemis,

Hey Duchess,

Charlie’s told me about Apollo and that we should coordinate trips back home to see our favorite non sister sister. His words not mine. Would it be possible for you to show me how to make that wondrous breakfast you made two years ago? Ive been craving it since last Christmas are your nightmares getting any better? What about the aftermath of the chamber? You and Harry try to stay out of trouble okay? I’ll see you when Charlie does. 

              Bill, Duke of Ginny’s tea party

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Artemis smiles at her latest letter sitting up in a tree near the burrow about to respond when George comes walking out of the back door tossing an apple up to her “did Apollo give you a time of arrival?” He asked as he started to climb up the tree to sit with her “yeah. Hes coming tomorrow at 9.” She said taking a bite “why are you out here all by your lonesome?” He asked biting his own honey crisp apple “can i show you?” He nods holding out his hand she takes it and he feels fear and tightness in his chest and the darkness that used to be the dungeon “im enjoying what i can of the light before its gone” she whispers out taking her hand back “youre afraid of the dark and cramped spaces?” He asked she nods slightly “Freddie Ron and i are going to rescue Harry tonight” George smiled “if there was enough room in the car i would invite you. But theres not. Sorry about that Artie” she smiles at him as they hear a pop “thats okay. Looks like my company for the night has just arrived “LIA BUG!” Charlie yelled from the gate “CHARLIE BEAR!” She yelled back as Mrs Weasley came out of the burrow “WILLIAM WEASLEY!” She shrieked as she ran engulfing her sons into a hug George looks at her “you knew they were coming?” “They wanted it to be a surprise” Artemis shrugged as George jumpped down hugging Bill than Charlie “come on now Duchess.” Bill said with a smile helping her down off the tree “five thirty A.M sharp at the kitchen ive already bought all the ingredients” she smiles at Bill Molly cocked an eyebrow “she promised to show me how to make her christmas breakfast so we’re cooking breakfast tomorrow youre not allowed to lift a single finger mum” Bill said leading his mom inside of the house “what are you two doing here?” She smiled as they sat down at the table “we wanted to meet Apollo. Check on Artie after winter since she wouldnt let me come when it happened” Charlie said cocking an eyebrow at her

“i promise youll be my birthing coach when i give birth some day. You’ll be right by my head hopefully making sure the father doesnt pass out will that make it up to you?” She cocks an eye brow at him “yes. Yes it does. Will the baby be named after me?” He asked “that we’ll have to see mr.” She tutted “its good to see you Lia Bug” he hugs her again “you too Charlie. Ive missed you” she said holding on tight “i brought you something from Romania” he said holding out a mirror to her “its a two way mirror. I sent the other half to Fred earlier this week. He told me to get it for you so you could call him from Grimmuald place.” Charlie smiled “heres the second one that ones for me. And Bill got you a muggle device that he uses when he’s in muggle egypt.” He said handing her the gifts. “Guys. You didnt have too” she smiled “of course we did!” Bill said “you get into too much trouble otherwise.” He rolled his eyes “you wound me sir” she giggled Midnight rolled around and Artemis was sitting on the sofa when Ron and the twins came down the stairs “so you three leaving then?” She said softly not wanting to stir Charlie awake she stands facing the three boys “don’t try and stop us!” Ron said rather loudly “calm down Ronnie. Save my little brother” she said hugging him moving to George “Keep them safe. Dont let Fred do anything dumb. Get Harry here safe” she whispered in his ear “always love” he whispered back to her she looks up to Fred “drive safe. Come back safe.” She said jumping into his arms “dont worry Artie. Its just going to London and back” “thats exactly why I’m driving.” Charlie’s voice called out she yelped “just when did you wake up” she whispered letting go of Fred who’s cheeks were bright red “‘dont try and stop us!’ Charlie mimicked Rons voice “lets go” he said as he walked out the door “nice going Ron” Fred scowled “we’ll be right back love” Fred smiled hugging her one last time “be safe” he nods “see you in a few hours” he softly said walking out the back door she snapped her fingers and the house started to clean itself thirty minutes later Bill walks into the kitchen as she was finishing up the side dishes of breakfast “Ready?” She asks him as he puts on an apron “as ready as I’ll ever be” he smiles “first, I split the English muffins and or bagels” she smiles as he helps her “the oven’s pre heated to 350 degrees toast the bread boil two parts water one part vinegar” “once its boiling make a tornado and crack an egg three minutes fish it out fry your ham after your eggs you assemble” she watches him as he puts it all together “good. Good, now this is the best part” she smiled “three egg yolks a stick of butter white vinegar put a bowl over boiling water and mix egg yolk and vinegar with butter adding that slowly until its thickened add a pinch of salt to taste” she hands him the bowl “pour over and youre done” she smiled as five people walked through the side door “WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN! CAR GONE! BEDS EMPTY! CHARLES SEPTIMUS WEASLEY! Harry dear its so good to see you” “IT WASNT HIS FAULT MUM! We had to rescue him! They were starving him and there were bars on his window!” “you best be glad I dont put bars on your window Ronald Weasley!” “Hey Lia smells great you didnt let Bill mess it up did you?” Charlie kissed her head grabbing a plate “yeah. He did well” she said as she sat down sipping her tea she stands up and hugs Harry “you didnt write me back” she frowned “it wasnt my choice. A house elf named Dobby said I couldn’t go back to Hogwarts “wait Dobby? The Malfoy’s elf?” She asked with an eyebrow cocked “sit. Eat you two” Molly smiled “MORNING WEASLEYS! Artemis” “MORNING DAD (mr. weasley)” as they continued to eat conversations continuing

Half way through breakfast there was a knock at the door her breath caught in her throat as Molly walked to the front door “whats going on?” Harry asked as Artemis stood up fidgeting hands “her brother is choosing to stay with her” George whispered to Harry she feels glued to her spot standing “Come in! Come in! We’re just eating breakfast!” Molly says as she ushered the three people in a boy the same hight as the twins stood in between two adults immediately locked eyes with Artemis they stood there looking at each other tears filled his eyes “Apollo…..” She breathed at the same time they ran and hugged eachother he picked her up by her waist rocking her slightly “Artie…” he cried lowering her back to her feet “ive missed you so much” he breathed “I smell eggs Bennys. Did you make it?” He asked she nodded she looked to her aunty “Artemis…” she hugged “you look just like Athena” she breathed “hello Uncle” she hugged him “alright. We’ll be off, Write us Apollo. And you too Artemis” Altair said apparating out of the house “hey, im Apollo, younger twin, mastermind, only person that has successfully pranked Artemis when we were four” he said ruffling her hair “shut up baba.’ She shakes her head “eat your food. Thats Mr and Mrs. Weasley, Bill the oldest, Charlie bear, the second, Percy third, Fred and George” “she told me so much about you two” “Ron and Harry, and Ginny’s upstairs” she smiles  when an owl flies into the window “and that would be Errol” Molly rolls her eyes as Percy takes the envelopes “Hogwarts letters! Harry Artemis’s and Apollo’s are here too” Percy called out handing the letters to each of them. “Thank you ma’am” Apollo said “oh heavens dear, its Molly” she patted his cheek “would you like some more food harry?” “You still never told me how you knew Dobby the house elf” he said as she scooped another scoop into his plate “oh. I used to live with him” “you used to live with him” “things didnt change for you?!?” Harry and Apollo said at the same time anger evident in his voice “what do you mean things didnt change?” Harry asked Apollo “Artie dont tell me while i was living a good life you were being someone elses house slave” he growled at her George shuddered first “Artemis and Harry now Apollo and Harry what coincidence is this” George whispered to Fred she snapped her fingers and appeared in the living room she levitated her plate to herself and snapped back to her seat

“Artemis please!” Apollo raised his voice pleading with her to deny that his worse fears are true “mate….” Fred started she put a hand on his arm she breathes out giving him a soft smile then looking to Apollo “lets talk outside Baba, theres a lot that we need to catch up on” she smiles as she gets up he follows her outside she stops at the door “excuse us,” Artemis smiled “What happened to you Artie?” He asked as the two of them sat down on a rock near the pond “i got sent to live with the Malfoys.” She said slowly “im going to show you” she whispered she held out her hand he took it and showed him her life since 7 years old he grips her hand “he beat you within an inch of your life” “yeah. I was going to kill myself when i got back to school. Instead… Fred brought me to Pomfreys and stayed the six months i had to stay. He never left my side and when he did. He left George in his place” she shrugged “Fred stayed with you?” He asked still holding her hand to his cheek “he protected you? Hes who i have to thank?” She cocks her head to the side nodding they talked everything through and Apollo listened he learned about everything Fred George and the Weasleys have done for her “why did do the animagus spell?” He asked “to be closer to dad” “i guess we are alike arent we?” “You?” He nodded to her she smiled “predator or prey?” She asked “predator, you?” “Predator” she smiled “so its Fred?” He asked her “Apollo” she shook her head “i dont want to break him” she whispered “Artie the bloke saved your life” “so?” “So are you kidding me Lōlō head hes the one that kept you safe for me i owe him everything” as he rushes back to the house “which ones Fred?” He asks the set of two “that would be him” George points to the left of him he grabs Freds wrist and pulls him into a hug “not complaining man… but whats this for?” He asks slowly putting a hand on his back “you saved my sister” he breathed out “you watched her. And protected her. You saved her” he hugged tighter “i did what a good friend wouldve?” He questioned “Apollo. Let go of Fred” she shook her head. “Sorry about that Freddie. He gets emotional sometimes. Or atleast he used to when we were kids.” She said as she walked passed him “when are we going for school supplies?” Artemis asked the twins “mums taking us tomorrow” George said as he walked upstairs “come on mate. I’ll show you to our room” George called out to Apollo. Artemis crossed her arms “if i get pranked youre going to regret it Gideon” she threatened lightly with a smile on her face “come on. Lets go play that game of quidditch” he smiled “race you up the stairs last one up does the washing up after dinner!” Fred yelled as he pushed her out of the way she snapped her fingers and appeared two steps ahead of him “YOU LITTLE MINX THATS CHEATING!” He yelled “YOU DIDNT SAY I COULDNT DO IT!” She said with a laugh  “who knew you both could play Quidditch so well” Charlie shook his head “youre the best seeker ive ever seen Lia” he complemented “why thank you charlie “and you. You make a good chaser Apollo, please call me Leonahe” he smiled to Charlie “im going to go take a shower” Artemis smiled as she closed the bathroom door “so. Who wants to learn how to prank my sister” Apollo smiles to the two boys sitting on the pull out bed “we’re in!” Fred and George say at the same time “wheres her room?” He asks they take him to her room he grabs something out of his pocket “one in each corner of the room” he smiled pulling out his wand floating two more above the door and another in each of the corners “now. We wait” he said a few moments later she opens the door and then she smells it “APOLLO!!!!” She yells as the stink bombs go off she sees the three boys standing outside her door “i cant even be mad” Artemis sighs as she looks between the three of them “you guys really suck you know that?” She smiles shaking her head jumping on her brothers back he easily catches her “now youre getting stink all over me” he groans “paybacks a bitch baba” she snickers

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Artemis’s screams fill the floor of the house they shared “NO STOP! FRED! GEORGE!! DONT HURT THEM! KILL ME INSTEAD LEAVE THEM ALONE! CHARLIE!” Her anguished screams pulled Fred from his sleep “Shit Artemis” he looked to George and Apollo jumping out of bed and running to her room “FRED! FRED GEORGE! CHARLIE! NO!” She screamed Charlie and Bill already outside her door about to open it Fred shoves them to the side as he bursted through the door with the group of boys behind him he jumps on the bed and pulls her into him George sits on the other side of her rubbing her back as Fred spoke “wake up baby girl. We’re okay. Wake up its just a dream” he whispered in her ear as she fought against his grip “Artemis its me. It’s Fred, its Fred and George its me wake up” he cooed rubbing her arms leaning back on the head board “Freddie? George? Charlie?” She looked around the room both boys pulled her into a big hug she let out a shakey breath “we’re here Artemis. He didnt get us. We’re alright. We’re right here.” George whispered holding her “you two got this then?” Bill whispered “we’ve got her Bill, you and Charlie get back to bed” George called as she balled up her fist in Freds pajama top crying letting the smell of cinnamon and fireworks take her “call us if you need anything” Charlie said glancing between the two boys “i’ll call you.” Fred said as the two oldest boys walked out of the room Apollo sits on the end of the bed “Lia?” He called “please stay…” she sobbed into Freds chest “dont leave me” she looked back to George, Apollo, and Fred “stay please” she cried again “we’re staying” the three boys said together “come on. I know what always made you feel better after a night mare” Apollo said pulling the covers so everyone was under the duvet him laying across the foot of the bed head propped up on his fist Artemis’s head on Freds chest the twins arms under her head and around her waist protectively “island baby… youre so beautiful… you drive me crazy you know youre all that i need so much more” Apollo sang to her as she relaxed in the twins arms Fred kissed her fore head “your strength and beauty i can see in your eyes. I loose sight of my world baby love no words can hold whats truly on my mind” Fred took over for Apollo who raised an eyebrow at him “just feel the beat of my heart and youll know what i need” George continued “youre my Pualena. Youre so beautiful god knows i love you and youre all i need pualena you take my breath away pualena” they sang together “you know lately” George starts “all i think about is holding you closely and never leaving your side I’ll keep you warm” Apollo sings holding her toe she giggles at him “time passes by and still youre on my mind i cant imagine living my life without you cause” Fred sings in her ear “the special moments you and i can only share will keep us together and never apart” Fred and George sing “youre my pualena” Apollo moves his head to her thighs her hand comes down to play with his hair “youre so beautiful” George sings “god knows i love you” Fred “and youre all i need” Apollo she closes her eyes and breathes out once she was asleep Apollo looked up at the twins who were still awake “how did you two know the song?” He asked quietly “we didnt at first” george breathed out flipping over with his back turned toward Artemis “she sang it constantly, in her bag. In the halls. Here. Class. We just picked up on the words” Fred breathed out as she cuddled more into him bringing his hand to brush through her hair “she said she wouldve killed herself if it wasnt for you and George staying with her.. taking her to Pomfreys” he sighed out

“shes staying because she loves you. She loves one of you and all of you” he says to the air “and with how fast you two Bill and Charlie got here and are choosing to stay with her on a tiny bed you love her too dont you?” Apollo asked “shes my best friend. The love i have for her is the kind of love thats friendly.” George sighed out yawning “im in love with her.” Fred whispered George snapped his head to his brother “youre finally admitting it to yourself there Gred?” “Shut up Forge” Fred shook his head he looked back to Apollo who was intent on him “i think ive always been in love with her. That first prank. A girl that could easily make my brothers laugh.. the way she played with my sister… when she smiles at me…. Her…” He sighed out “but i cant… Not yet. I want her to know that she doesnt need me to pick up her pieces for her and she can do it without someone there i want her to understand that shes strong enough, Brave enough, smart enough, And shes worth it for herself i dont want to overwhelm her by telling her how i feel im afraid its going to be too much too soon. And i break her” he absent mindedly played with her hair as she breathed out slumping more into him he smiles down at her “im not ready to lose her completely when shes fixing herself im here to help her and thats enough for me right now i dont deserve her the way i want her. She can find someone so much better someone who can give her the world” he whispered “thats exactly why you deserve her” Apollo whispered out to him “she looks at you.. she looks at you the way my mom looked at my dad in her wedding picture” he sighed out quietly accio ing the picture from the bag handing it to him “your mom was really pretty” George said as they looked at the picture of Athena and Sirius dancing “she kind of looks like him… but with your moms lips and eyes” Fred said as he studied the picture “See that look?” He pointed to his moms face “that look is how she looks at you” Apollo sighs out laying on his back looking up at the roof of the room “the old ladys in love” he mumbled “shes doing it all for you and your siblings because shes in love with you and your family. The way she treats Mrs. Weasley is the same way she used to be with my mom. But more…. Grown up?” He questions “she gave up her childhood for yours. She loves you” Fred thought out loud “she sacrificed her well being for Harry and my younger brother. She loves them.”  Fred pulls her closer “i want to give her everything” he sighed out “everything that shes missed” “because you love her” Apollo smiled “i like you.  And George. Your whole family saved her. Im happy she has all of you” “why are you saying like we dont have you too? Give yourself more credit Leonahe.” George asked “mums already making you a Christmas sweater from the first Howler you sent her. Youre not just a friend. Youre family.” George sighed out “Mrs. Weasley doesnt have to do that” he said softly

“she wants to. If mum had her way Artemis wouldnt leave this house ever again. You shouldve seen what happened the day she got back to Hogwarts from winter break. Mum was ready to strangle Narcissa” Fred whispered “only when Artemis agreed to Sunday dinners and Molly as an emergency contact did she agree to let Artemis go back to Grimmuald place, or atleast thats what she said” he continued “i asked her to stay” soft snores of George filled the room as they talked “shes stubborn. I know why she cant. It just sucks that i wasnt enough for her to stay.” Fred sighed “its not because you arent enough. Its because she needs to do this. She needs to get her closure. She needs to work some things out i dont know how much shes showed you or told you” “she showed me glimpses of everything. Nothing in too much detail. Other than winter break.” Fred said “our grandmother… she was mean. And filled our head with false information of our dad and mom. She hid most of my dads possessions in the mannor. Whatever mum didnt have the things he left behind when he ran away and get away in time.” Apollo sighed out “papers that proved his innocence. She wants to go back and find them she wants our family back she thinks that if she gets us back.. she’ll become whole again. But she doesnt see it. You. You your brothers and sister your parents. You made her whole. She is whole. Shes been that. Because of you. All of her happy memories she showed me?? Had you and George in them and some with Charlie. But most of them was you Fred ‘you protect her Potter do not let her out of your sight!’ That changed her”

Apollo sighed out “she told me you asked her to stay and she wanted to say yes. She cried that she said no. She wanted to stay with you. But this is something that she has to do.” “Then you know what she dreams about?” He asks yawning “yeah…. I know what shes dreaming about….. she told me about the boggart. And Lee. He sounds nice” Apollo sighed out “handsome too” he shifted on the bed closing his eyes “believe me when i say youre more than enough. My sister doesnt give her heart out. She never did. Not even to me. The things she told you. Shes never told me.” He yawns “goodnight Gred” Fred chuckles “she was right. I like you a lot” “i dont think you swing this way” he chuckled

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Molly opens the bedroom door looking in “she had a nightmare last night” Charlie called from his door she looks from Charlie back to the bed where Fred, Artemis, George ans Apollo are sleeping with Apollo laid out across their legs Artemis’s legs draped over Georges torso and her head on Freds as loud snores filled the room “she… she dreams about the things that happen” he explained more as he walked into the room shaking Apollo’s shoulder waking him slowly “Im sorry i didnt mean to disrespect you mr. Mcmiggen” he murmered as he shot up from the bed Charlie shaking the twins awake who wake Artemis “come on time for breakfast you four” Charlie said as he brushed his hand through Artemis’s hair “Charlie” she smiles “hey Lia you okay?” He asked “better now” she smiled at him softly he shares that smile “lets go eat” he smiled turning to walk out of the room “piggy back ride?” She asked Fred who was standing up next to Charlie he laughed “lets go” he said turning around  she wrapped her arms around his shoulders as he lifted her off the bed “ready?” Fred asked looking over his shoulder to her she smiled and nodded “lets go” he laughed as he ran down the stairs Artemis yelps in glee as he rounds the corner catching Arthurs attention he looked to his oldest twin “whats happening here” Arthur smiles “oh nothing Dad. Artie just wanted the royal treatment” Fred said adjusting her on his back as he walked into the kitchen putting her down in her chair he sits down next to her as they talk “theyre like us arent they Molls?” Arthur asked as his wife stood next to him in the living room “more like James and Lily” she smiled to her husband he looks at her “ten sickles” he smirked at his wife “youre on. I say sixth year. After a big fight” she challenged “i say by the end of next year. Romantic gesture on Freds part” Arthur bets “ten more sickles says she asks him” Charlie said “i bet 2 galleons he messes up and she snaps his head off telling him off while admitting her feelings this coming school year” Bill bet “looks like we have a bet” Arthur smiled at his wife and oldest boys watching the two sets of twins bicker in the kitchen “looks like the books are going to be expensive this year mum” Percy said as they all ate “we’ll manage “i’ll buy the books this year” Artemis said as she cut Molly off “absolutely not!” She argued “Molly you took care of me all summer this is the least i can do. Besides. Its books. I spend my money on books anyway” she shrugged “i get the books. You get the quills and ink pots” she smiled “that way you can get Ginny and Ron new robes this year” Artemis smiled “well if shes buying the books I’ll get the robes” Apollo said “Artemis. Apollo. No, we can manage” Molly argued “im sorry Mrs. Weasley but this isnt something that can be compromised on. Artemis is getting the books. I will get the robes for everyone.” Apollo said with a smile

“may i please be included in on the family dinners on Sundays when we move to our grandmothers house?” He asks her with soft eyes “you were always invited Apollo. So is Harry.” She smiled “i guess our hands are tied Arthur.” Molly sighed as she shook her head before they left Molly insisted they all bundle up Fred knocked on Artemis’s door “hey” he said walking in “hey Freddie” she smiled at him as she pulled on her sweat shirt “you were right. I do like him” he smiled “hes great. I finally got you” he smiled “first and last time Weasley” she said playfully she turns to him and looks him in his eye her smile dropped as she looked at him his face turned with turmoil  “Apollo told you… didnt he?” He nodded her heart dropped “Fred….” “If you ever feel like that ever again. And i mean ever. Artemis i want you to come to me. I want to help you. I want you to call me. Owl me. Floo to where i am. Please. I cant… i cant lose you Artie. I cant” he breathes out she wrapped her arms around his torso “i promise you wont lose me” she whispered looking up at him he huffed as he hugged her “i promise i’ll come to you. I promise youre the first to know. I promise i wont leave you” she closed her eyes he leaned his forehead on hers “okay” his voice cracked “lets get down stairs” he pulled away from her smiling she nodded linking their arms together 

[luckyduckwrites]

Not A Human? Chapter 1-11: Adventures in the Elements

Fandom: The Owl House (Cartoon)

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Luz Noceda & Original Character(s), Eda Clawthorne & Original Character(s), Raine Whispers & Original Character(s), Willow Park & Original Character(s), Gus Porter & Original Character(s), Hunter | The Golden Guard (The Owl House) & Original Character(s), Lilith Clawthorne & Original Character(s), Amity Blight & Original Character(s), King Clawthorne (The Owl House) & Original Character(s), Amity Blight/Luz Noceda, Viney/Original Character

Characters: Original Non-Binary Character, Original Non-Human Character(s), Luz Noceda, Eda Clawthorne, Skara (The Owl House), Willow Park, Gus Porter, Hunter | The Golden Guard (The Owl House), Lilith Clawthorne, King Clawthorne (The Owl House), Amity Blight, Viney (The Owl House)

Additional Tags: Good Sibling Luz Noceda, Luz Noceda has ADHD, POV First Person, POV Original Character, Original Eda Clawthorne and Raine Whispers Child(ren), Minor Eda Clawthorne/Raine Whispers, Minor Hunter | The Golden Guard/Willow Park (The Owl House), Good Friend Willow Park, Good Friend Gus Porter, Hunter | The Golden Guard and Gus Porter are Siblings (The Owl House), Luz Noceda and Gus Porter are Siblings, Hunter | The Golden Guard and Luz Noceda are Siblings (The Owl House), Eda Clawthorne Adopts Hunter | The Golden Guard, Aunt Lilith Clawthorne, Aromantic Asexual Lilith Clawthorne, Eda Clawthorne is King Clawthorne's Parent, King Clawthorne and Luz Noceda are Siblings (The Owl House), Eda Clawthorne Adopts King Clawthorne, Gay Disaster Amity Blight, Bisexual Disaster Luz Noceda, Slow Romance, Slow To Update, Enemies to Friends to Lovers

Summary:

My name is Melody. I've never met my real parents, but my adoptive mom Camila told me that she found me with an owl-patterned blanket and a note that said, 'I'm sorry I cant be there to raise you, my special Melody. I just hope someone will be able to protect you better than I can. Love, your mother ---' with the name scratched out. My adoptive sister Luz and I get bullied a lot in school, but at least we have each other. She finally got in too much trouble with the principal, and Mama Camila was forced to send her to a summer camp to 'correct her behavior', and I have to go with her so she's not alone. As we're waiting for the bus, a small owl takes off with her favorite book, The Good Witch Azura. The owl leads us into a door, and suddenly we're in another world! But why does it look so familiar?

(Melody is nonbinary and goes by they/them pronouns)

**AO3 & Wattpad links in masterpost pinned to the top of the blog**

Luz and I will be starting school at Hexside in a few days at the start of the semester, and we were each sent a pamphlet of the school's accomplishments and how it was founded and all that nonsense. My sister is reading her pamphlet thoroughly after I tossed mine in the garbage. It's just a school; I don't understand why we got those stupid things.

Luz exclaims, "Hey, Mel, listen to this!"

King says from where he was laying on Luz's stomach, "Hey! Less read-y more scratchy!"

Luz sits up, saying, "Sorry!"

I ask, "Why are you even reading that stupid thing, Luz? I got bored after the first page."

Luz responds, "Now that we'll be students are Hexside, I wanna learn all about it! I've got a crush, and her name is Education!"

I raise an eyebrow and tease with a smirk, "As opposed to your last crush named Jae?"

Luz rolls her eyes, saying, "Yeah, yeah. Jae liked you better anyways."

I scoff, saying, "Maybe so, but Jae never told me that they liked me until after they'd moved away with their brother Gus, and it was through text!"

King asks, "What's a text?"

Before I could answer, Mom kicks the front door open, exclaiming, "Hey, freeloaders! Guess what today is!"

Luz asks her, "Is it your birthday?"

King asks, "Is it my birthday?"

I add, "I'm fairly certain it isn't, but is it my birthday? Mama didn't know mine, so she had to guess."

Hooty exclaims, "It's my birthday!"

Mom shuts the door, exclaiming, "No, it's human treasure day!"

She tosses the portal door into the air, and it unfolds and opens. Owlbert flies through the door, dragging a giant sack. The sack tears when he flips it onto the floor before completely falling apart, revealing a pile of human garbage.

The door closes, and Mom hops onto the pile, saying, "Ah, fresh garbage."

King pleads, "Ooh! Gimme, gimme, gimme!" He pulls a teddy bear out of the pile, exclaiming, "Yes! Another worthy addition to my army of terror!

He pulls the bear's string, and it says a recorded line, "I love cuddles and kisses!"

King says with joy, "Truly horrifying!"

I rummage around in the pile before pulling out an old handheld gaming console and some batteries. I haven't seen a real Game Kid console in a while! And it already has Legend of Zeldonia inside!

I pull open Mom's junk drawer of human collectibles and find some double-A batteries, powering up the console. I flop back onto the couch with my 'found' console and sink into the cushions, starting a new game.

Mom says to Luz, "Yo, kid. Your trash pile's getting cold, while mine's getting hot!" She pulls out a wire clothes hanger, saying, "I have never seen such an extravagant earring."

I look up from my game at Mom as she places two clothing hangers on her ears, saying, "Those are clothing hangers, Mom."

She shrugs, seeming to not care what their actual use is.

Luz says, "You can have my trash. Whoa! Did you know that Hexside was built on the bones of its rival school? One it literally conquered!"

She shows me a picture from the pamphlet of a much younger Principal Bump standing on several students and being cheered on by fellow Hexside students, the rival school burning behind them.

Mom says, "Yes, I know all these things, I went there. It was the most harrowing period of my life." She looks at herself in a mirror, muttering, "Oh, hello."

Luz ignores her, exclaiming to me, "Can you imagine it?! Us, in the halls of Hexside, studying with Willow and Gus and maybe even Amity!"

She suddenly has an 'oh, crap' look on her face as she jumps up from the couch.

She exclaims, "Amity! Oh, cramity! We're supposed to meet so I can get my Azura book back!" She runs out with her bag and slams the door behind her, then re-opens the door, exclaiming, "I love you guys!"

I say, "Love you, too, Z!"

Hotty adds, "And I love you, Lu- Ah!"

He screams as Luz slams the door again, and Mom says, "Eh, who needs her?"

King adds, "Yeah! This bear could be our new Luz."

He pulls the bear's string, and it says, "Being without you is just un-bear-able."

King throws the teddy bear across the room, exclaiming, "No, you're unbearable!"

After playing my game for a while, Mom starts looking through a spellbook for a spell to bring her vegetables to life so they can cook themselves for lunch.

She hums, saying, "Wow, a surprisingly peaceful domestic moment. When will it be ruined?"

Luz slams the front door open, exclaiming, "Eda!"

Mom mutters, "There it is."

My sister runs into the kitchen, exclaiming, "Eda! Eda! Eda!" She trips and falls, but gets back up immediately, adding, "You have to teach me a new spell right now!"

Mom says, "Sorry, Luz. These vegetables won't cook themselves... yet."

She dumps a potion onto the vegetables, making them all grow arms and legs.

She says, "Alright, everybody in the pot!" The vegetables scream and run, and Mom asks, "Why do I always think that's gonna work?"

I ask Luz, "Why do you need to learn a new spell? Isn't that what we'll be doing at school?"

Luz responds, "I need to know two spells to get into decent classes at Hexside! I can make light glyphs." She pulls one out and activates it, making Mom shield her eyes as she adds, "But at the end of the day, that's the only spell I know."

She flops face-first on the floor, and Mom asks, "And whose fault is that?"

I raise an eyebrow and set my game down, saying, "Yours, Mom."

Mom says, "Ha! Yup, got me there."

Luz stands again, saying desperately, "Just teach me a spell now. Any spell! It can be the darkest evil."

Mom says, "Well, I have been researching my texts on wild magic, but I'm much too busy right now."

She throws the spellbook in the pot, and I say, "Too busy to teach your kid's sister magic? Even I know two spells, but you don't have time to teach a single spell?"

Luz adds, "And you're the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles. How would it look if your apprentice got thrown in the baby class?"

Mom thinks for a moment, saying, "Hm. Weaponizing my pride. Well played. Well, in that case, this looks like a job for magic boot camp."

King runs into the room, asking, "Did someone say 'boot camp'? I agree to run it. We'll rise at dawn! You'll carry me on your back as I yell hateful things about your performance!"

Mom says to him, "Nope. You'll have no part in this. Luz needs to focus, and I can't have her go all weird when you do something adorable."

I add, "Which is pretty much always."

King exclaims, "I am not adorable!"

He stomps, and Luz coos, "Aw, he stamped his little foot!"

King squeals with anger, slamming the door behind him. It opens by itself and he slams it again. It re-opens, and he slams it even harder, making me laugh at his antics.

Mom says, "Now, no time to waste. You'll have to follow my teachings exactly. We gotta go somewhere special."

Luz exclaims, "Yes!"

Mom adds, "A place where magic energy just flows."

Luz climbs onto the counter, exclaiming louder, "Yes!"

She throws her old winter clothing at us, and she flies us far away to a tall, cold mountain, adding, "A place like... the Knee!"

Luz shouts, "Yes!"

Her cry echoes around us, and I ask, "What's so special about this place?"

Mom responds, "The earliest witches came to the Knee to develop their magic, drawn to its natural power."

Luz gasps, saying, "It's beautiful!"

Mom gestures to the side, saying, "Though, it's not without its dangers."

Luz screams and I jump back as we look at where Mom was gesturing, a giant eyeless beast gnawing on a tree trunk below.

Mom says, "The Slitherbeast. Don't worry; if you don't mess with him, he won't mess with you."

Luz blows a raspberry at the Slitherbeast as we start walking away, and it bites right through the tree trunk and sniffs in our direction. Luz yelps and starts speeding off toward Mom and I.

We finally stop, and Mom says, "Here's where we'll set up shop."

I take a deep breath, saying, "It feels like it'd be easier to do magic here. It feels... freeing somehow, y'know?"

Luz exclaims, "I'll definitely learn my second spell here! Gorgeous views, magic in the air... and best of all, we're completely alone!"

A pink light illuminates her, and Mom exclaims, "Watch out!"

She tackles my sister out of the way and pulls me down just seconds before a pink fireball hits the spot Luz and I had just been standing in.

I mutter, "Geez, that was close."

Mom pops up over the rocks we fell behind with her staff drawn, and Luz pops up and gasps as we hear Amity exclaim, "Sorry, whoever's over there!"

Luz ducks back down, hiding her face with her hat as she says to Mom, "Forget teaching me a spell, just make me disappear."

Mom says, "Well, okay, but I've got a 60/40 record of making you reappear."

I shake my head 'no' at Mom before sneaking a peek over the rock.

She says, "Oh, you meant... ah, nevermind."

Who are those two green-haired teens with Amity? Her siblings, maybe? They seem to know my sister, since they're waving excitedly up at us.

The boy calls out, "Hey, Luz!"

The girl adds, "Hello!"

The boy adds, "Hey, it's us!"

I ask my sister, "Who are those two? How do they know you?"

Luz responds, her voice quiet, "Remember when I told you about how I befriended Amity at the library after Eda made me return her books?" I nod, and she continues, "Well, I also befriended her older twin siblings, Edric and Emira, and they were being bullies to Amity. They were trying to find her diary so they could print off copies of the pages and spread them around at school."

I ask, "What? How could they do that?"

Luz responds, "I don't know, but they seem to be treating her better now."

I say, "Well, then, let's go say hi. Isn't Amity your friend?"

Luz reluctantly nods, saying, "Okay, let's do this." She stands up and waves at the green-haired teens, exclaiming, "Hey, guys!"

Mom asks, "Who are they?"

She doesn't seem to have heard Luz telling me exactly that.

Luz grabs Mom's jacket, saying to her in a harsh whisper, "Be cool! If they know I haven't mastered two spells, they'll think I belong in the baby class!"

Amity asks while walking toward us, "What's that about the baby class?"

Mom covers, "Only that it's for babies, and Luz and Mel here clearly aren't babies." Luz glares at her, and she mutters, "Nailed it."

Mom walks away, and Luz slips and strikes a fake cool pose, exclaiming nervously, "Amity!"

I say, narrowing my eyes slightly, "Hey, Amity. Last time I saw you, you were trying to kill me and my sister for extra credit. Did you end up becoming top student again?"

Amity looks away and rubs her arm nervously, saying, "Not exactly. The top student is supposed to showcase good behavior, and I wasn't exactly doing that."

I shrug nonchalantly. Makes sense.

Luz asks, "What... What are you doing here?"

Amity responds, "I'm here to train. I'm trying to beat Ed and Em's highest score on the exam."

Her older sister pops up from behind her, saying, "Aw, Mittens. That's impossible!"

I fail to stifle a chuckle, muttering, "Mittens."

Amity rolls her eyes, and Amity's brother also pops up from behind her, adding, "She still needs to use a training wand to learn new spells. So what're you workin' on? Something powerful?"

Luz responds nervously, "Yup! Powerful spells! I'm workin' on one that's so crazy! Eda's a pretty incredible teacher."

I add, "And she's not too bad at being a mom, not counting leaving me in the human world to be raised by someone else."

Edric asks, "The Owl Lady's your mom?"

Before I could answer, Mom walks back over to us carrying a basket of snowballs, Luz! Melody! I shall now teach you how to identify different types of snow... by taste!" She holds out a snowball, saying, "Go on, eat the snow."

She shoves a snowball in my face, and I roll my eyes, grabbing the snowball and taking a bite. It's just cold water; what's the big deal?

Edric turns to me, asking again, "Seriously, that's your mom?"

Emira asks, "Is this some kind of... special magic?"

Amity starts pulling her older siblings away as Mom shoves the entire basket of snowballs into her mouth, the green-haired girl saying, I don't think the Owl Lady wants to show us any of her 'powerful spells'."

She leaves, and Mom points to the snowballs filling her mouth, then swallows them all at once.

She holds her head, exclaiming, "Ooh. Brain freeze! Brain freeze!"

Emira says, "See you around, human! Good luck with you, Uh, 'training'."

Edric picks up a clump of snow and tries to lick it, but Emira knocks it out of his hand and drags him away.

He mutters, "Aw."

Edric and Luz wave to each other, and Luz  exclaims to Mom, "Eda! Can you please take this seriously?"

Mom shakes her head one last time to get rid of her brain freeze, then says, "You both need to take me seriously. Go taste snow without my guidance, see where it gets you."

I mutter, "How is tasting snow supposed to help her learn magic? She needs to learn a new spell soon, and goofing around isn't helping."

Luz looks downcast, and Mom finally notices, saying, "Oh." She sighs, saying, "Don't worry, kid." She ruffles Luz's hair, adding, "If you listen to me, soon you'll be doing stuff like that."

She gestures down at the Blights, and Luz and I watch them. Amity reads from a book titled 'Magic 101', then aims her training wand at a tree and draws a spell circles with it. The spell circles produces a pink fireball and destroys the tree. The battery light on the side of the training wand flashes. So wands without palismen on them are operated by battery? Interesting.

Mom continues, "And it won't be with some wack training wand, it'll be the real deal. But you have to trust me, okay?"

Luz nods, saying, "Okay. I trust you."

I sigh, asking, "Alright. What's next Mom?"

She replies, "We've covered snow, so now it's on to smelling moss." She pulls moss out of her pocket and starts shoving it up her nose, saying, "Now, the trick is, you've really gotta get it up in there."

Luz's expression falls again, and we have to go through a bunch of different 'training' led by Mom until it gets dark enough to make a fire. Mom gestures at me to make it once she's piled some of the sticks that Luz sorted, and I nervously draw a spell circle toward the branched, a small red fire spouting from my fingers.

Mom smiles and sits in front of the fire next to me, sipping some apple blood from her mug.

Luz emerges from the forest, saying with a bit of annoyance in her tone, "Ugh. Okay, I've identified the smells of three different rocks, sorted all the twigs from small to big, and found your glove. And your hand."

She holds up a glove with a detached hand inhabiting it, and Mom says, "Ah, I was wondering where that thing went."

She screws her hand back on, and I ask, "So... is that something that I'll have to deal with eventually?"

Mom shrugs, saying, "I dunno. It's not a huge deal if you do anyways."

Luz asks, "So what now?"

She looks down at the Blights training below us. Amity sends a jet of fire at Edric with the training wand, but he dodges it. Emira summons an arm of snow, and Amity blocks and destroys it with a shield. Amity dispels the shield and waves up at Luz with a goofy smile, and Edric uses the distraction to make Amity sink in the snow until only her hand is showing.

Luz giggles, and Mom says, "Hey, I know my lessions seem weird, but this is what wild magic is all about! Making a connection with nature. The earliest witches understood that. Human witches need to understand it, too. You wanna learn a second spell?"

Luz says desperately, "With all my heart."

Eda says, "Then you have to learn from the island." She guides Luz and I to a rock and makes my sister sit down, adding, "Now, look."

The rock overlooks the Titan the Boiling Isles is built upon, and its ribs are nearly the same height as the Knee, and its skull is towering even from the opposite end of the Isles. Luz and I stare at the sight in awe as wind blows past.

Mom continues, "And think about what the island is telling you."

She leaves, pulling me along with her. Oh, boy. Luz isn't that great at concentrating when she's alone. I've overheard her talking to herself in different voices one time when Mama made her stay in her room until her homework was finished. After around an hour, Mom gets angry as we see a large fireball exploding like a firework in the sky.

We run back to where we left Luz, who's exclaiming, "I did magic! I did magic!" She jumps in place, adding, "Without drawing anything! This this is the coolest!"

Mom says, "Hold it right there. What are you doing with that?"

Luz says, "I'm doing magic, what would you have me do? Eat more snow? Lick a rock?"

I ask, "So your solution is to steal your friend's training wand? I know you weren't really getting anything from Mom's lessons, but your first thought is to resort to theft?"

Mom says, "Okay, so maybe my methods are... unique, but so is your magic, Luz. Connecting to the island can help you. That wand can't."

Luz says, "Well, it's already helped me. Just watch what I can do!"

She draws a spell circle, but the power bar on the wand flashes a low-battery light, and Luz loses control of the fireball.

She exclaims nervously, "Wh... Whoa!"

The fireball goes off further into the Knee. When it lands, birds fly off, and the Slitherbeast growls. Mom gasps as the beast jumps of the trees, a large patch of fur burned off over its mouth, the Slitherbeast still growling.

Mom says in disbelief, "You've angered the Slitherbeast." It roars, and she repeats in anger, "You've angered the Slitherbeast!"

Luz asks, "Will it accept a heartfelt apology?"

The Slitherbeast sniffs, growls, and runs at Luz, who screams as we all run away.

I say, "I don't think an apology will be enough. That thing's out for blood!"

Mom shoves Luz and I out of the way, exclaiming, "Watch out!"

The Slitherbeast grabs Mom, and she screams and wriggles in its grip as it growls.

Luz exclaims, "Eda!"

I add, "Mom!"

We hear Amity exclaim, "Luz!"

The Blights arrive, and Edric asks, "What did we miss?"

Amity adds, "And what are you doing with my wand?"

I add, "Yeah, Luz, what are you doing with Amity's wand?"

Luz mutters nervously, "Um..."

Amity takes her wand and her book and holds them protectively.

Emira says, "Mittens, we've got bigger problems."

The Slitherbeast advances on us, Mom still held in one claw as it growls at us. Emira runs in front of us, saying in an almost mocking tone, "Aw, he's so cute. Can we keep him?"

Edric runs up with her and adds, "It's no bat, but we could try."

They both draw a single large spell circle together and cast a lasso at the Slitherbeast's hands. It growls and pulls at the bonds, and the twins struggle to keep hold of the summoned rope.

Mom exclaims, "You got it! Now finish it off!"

Amity exclaims, "I'm on it!"

She runs forward and tries to cast a spell with her training wand, but nothing happens.

She asks, "What?"

She smacks the wand against her hand, then notices the low battery light.

She turns to Luz, asking angrily, "Did you use this all up?"

Luz exclaims, "I... I didn't know!"

Emira exclaims, "Come on, Luz!"

Edric adds, "Do those powerful spells you were talking about!"

Luz says, "But I don't actually... know any."

The Slitherbeast growls and frees its hands with a yell, and the Blight twins are yanked into the snow.

Amity exclaims, "Edric! Emira!"

The Slitherbeast moves it's hand to grab the Blights, but I shove Amity out of the way, getting myself captured in the process. Oops.

Amity exclaims, "No!"

The Slitherbeast puts the twins and I into the claw holding Mom and runs off, the four of us yelling as the beast runs. Amity and Luz follow us for a bit, but eventually fall behind. It takes us to a large cave obscured by fog. It spits purple goop at the cave wall, and shoves the four of us against it, the goop closing around out torsos as the Slitherbeast hops away.

Emira says, "Don't worry. We'll be fine!"

Skeletons drop from the ceiling, and Edric says in fear, "No, we're gonna die."

Luz says, "That's right." She pops up with a skull over her face, saying, "Death is here." She lifts the skull, saying, "Just kidding, Luz is here!"

Mom exclaims, "Kid, get outta here! I'm just gonna sneak Melody and I away when the thing starts eating the twins."

Emira asks, "Wait, what?"

Edric lets out an offended gasp, and I ask, "How do you know it'll eat them first and not us, Mom?"

Mom shrugs, and Luz says, "Don't worry, Eda, I get it now. I was so obsessed with learning my second spell, I didn't listen to you. Either of you. But now I'm gonna save you!" She jumps away and starts dancing in place, exclaiming, "Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!"

Mom says, "Well, at least I got to see her misplaced confidence one last time."

The Slitherbeast soon returns, and sprinkles assorted seasonings on mine, Edric, Emira, and Mom's heads.

Mom sneezes, muttering, "Ugh, I hate garlic."

Luz pops out from her hiding place, exclaiming, "Hey, you big idiot!" She waves her arms, adding, "Over here!"

The Slitherbeast turns and growls at her and jumps at Luz, who runs. Amity climbs up to her siblings and Mom and me.

Edric exclaims, "Amity!"

Emira adds, "Use that fire spell we taught you!"

Amity exclaims, "But I can't do it without the wand!"

Emira says, "Yes, you can. Just focus."

Amity takes a deep breath, then says, "Okay."

She slowly traces a spell circle in front of her. It wavers when she closes her eyes, but a ball of pink fire appears after a moment, and she smiles proudly.

Emira says, "Cool. I didn't think you could actually do it."

Amity melts the four of us free, and Luz screams.

Amity and I exclaim, "Luz!"

We run toward where we heard her, and see her dodging the Slitherbeast and running out of the cave, drawing a large, unfamiliar spell glyph in the snow. The Slitherbeast follows her until she gets to a tree and stops, growling loudly.

Luz exclaims, "Gotcha!"

She steps on the glyph drawn into the snow and ducks away from the rising pillar of ice, launching the Slitherbeast into the air, landing hard on its back. We all run out of the cave as the Slitherbeast rights itself, screeches at us, and runs at us.

Mom asks, "You want me to teach you kids something cool?"

Amity, Emira, and I exclaims, "Yes!"

Edric adds at the same time, "Yes, please!"

Mom runs forward and draws a spell circle and grunts as she sends it at the Slitherbeast, exclaiming, "Sleep spell!"

Her spell circle passes around the Slitherbeast, and it immediately falls to the ground and begins snoring.

I exclaims excitedly, "Yeah! That's my mom!"

Luz runs up to Mom, exclaiming, "Did you see? I learned my second spell! I made the connection!"

Mom responds, "I saw." She ruffles Luz's hair, adding, "Nice work, kiddo."

Emira sighs, saying to Amity, "You showed some real bravery in there, sis."

Edric adds, "Yeah, nice work, kiddo."

He ruffles Amity's hair, and she exclaims, "Ugh, stop!" She fixes her hair and approaches Luz and I, saying, "So it looks like we'll all be in the same class."

Luz asks, "Azura book club? Azura book club?!"

Amity blushes, whispering, "As long as it's a secret club, okay?"

Edric exclaims, "It's not a secret!"

Emira adds, "We're gonna tell everyone!"

Amity sighs disappointedly, and Mom sneezes between the two girls, making the jump as she says, "Alright, your adorable banter is literally making me sick. Let's go home already."

Luz exclaims, "On it, teach!"

Luz draws another ice glyph and activates it, making a diagonal pillar of ice that sends us flying toward home, the three of us cheering as we soar. When we finally get home and open the front door, we see stuffing and small pieces of stuffed animals raining down in the living room.

Kind says, "Private Hooty; today, when the felt flew, you showed grit and determination that were instrumental in securing our victory. May I just say, it has been an honor to be your commander."

Hooty says, "Sir, the honor is all mine."

King hugs Hooty, saying, "Private, our hearts have been touched by fire, and-"

Mom clears her throat loudly from where we stand in the doorway, and she asks, "What the heck did you two get into?"

King exclaims, "Um, excuse me! We're having a moment here!"

Hooty tears up, exclaiming, "You'll never understand what we've been through together! Never! Never!"

King walks away, saying, "Ugh, moment ruined."

Hooty says, "I will be haunted by my actions forever. Hoot hoot!"

I blink a few times before saying, "I don't wanna know."

[pwblogarchive]

July 2006

July 1, 2006

“sex and the city (the part theyll never tell you)”

its strange here this time of year. because the weather never changes.it is always summer here. so it doesnt feel like the same desperate love of these three pages on the calendar. or at least not what i am used to.patrick and i wrote a song yesterday. not a hit single or maybe anything that would even turn your head.noone knows how it goes.sometimes the worst wishes are the ones that come true.yellow and white lines to the coast.you can learn to love anything if its around enough.some people learn to love their mistakes.shakes hands. "thank you, our time is up".what keeps you coming back?i got a long rap sheet.(the statute of limitations is running out on you pretty fast).the powders wet. the sparks arent coming.the hammer isnt hitting. its spinning.you can learn to love anything.posted by xo @ 11:22 PM

July 5, 2006

the last thing i think of before i fall asleep and the first thing i think of when i wake

regardless of what stars i end up under- for the best and for the worst- you have made me who i am. and i try to make myself more decent and better only because of you.

haveanicelife

Posted by xoat 6:06 AM

June 5, 2006

Stick around long enough and everyone becomes parody of themselves 

you dont hate me, you hate the part of you that is like me. i cant sit here and ride my flaws until the end because the truth is i live the charmed life because of you and them. we are a gang. maybe its time to disband. im not sure i am thinking clearly but i just want you to know that i waited on you guys calls all night- they never came. i just wanted to say i miss you or im sorry or you know something that would have meant something to you. i would have made it poetic and memorable or at least something you could laugh at while drifting off to sleep. always trying to relive the glory days.

i dont care how poorly these sentences were constructed or how in the light of day i will wish i had not written them- right now i can only curse the fucking light off of this stupid western city because it wont ever get dark enough for sleep but otherwise how could you guide your way back here?

my head always feels warm right before i pass out, i always worry that there is something wrong and i wont wake up or you know i will. promise me that you wont take anything i ever say too seriously.

July 7, 2006

“his and hers”

sometimes i cant wait to be forgotten.i wish i could put up an away message in real life and just go to sleep forever.posted by xo @ 3:10 AM

July 7, 2006

“im so sorry, but not really. ('straighten up and die right’)”

i said i want to be rebuilt like a frank lloyd wright only without all of the water damage. or painted over like a monet only less blurry. she said “no, youre something different”. like what? “something better”. it gave me the rush of warm blood like you see in cartoon dogs right before their eyes pop out and all of the bells go off. my head is spinning like a car off of an icy guardrail. show me what you are made of. your eyes were always rolling but youd tilt your head so they were somehow always still stuck on me (have your cake and eat it too). i feel safe but not like a bet more like the way mothers feel when the lock the car doors in bad neighborhoods. i am blue waves across the red rootlike veins in the bodies drawn flat in medical books. i wonder at the way that someone can write thousands and thousands of pages about my insides. when i met you i gave you a name- not your own- but in my head so i wouldnt ever mix you up with anyone so ordinary- i cant tell you- but to me it meant salvation. you only wanted reaction. but i cant be bothered. not anymore. ill see you in the spring. first pew on the left. wear your white veil and dont forget the words. warped tour. sun drenched days. bestfriends. new roads. so long salvation. dont worry your pretty little heads. i am sleeping safe tonight.

July 8, 2006

“the fraternal order of the handsome boy”

ive been watching you from afar

my breath on the inside window as you walk in from the car

candy caned lies in red and white against clashing patterns bending in and out of understanding.

"youre the stranger ive been dreaming of", stranger than any ive ever known.

love through a telescopic lens. when the air is clear i can see how perfect you are for me.

late at night when the city sleeps i cast a spell on you

to make you think of me the very same way i think of you.

i only love how the words feel in my head when i write them.

fireworks over the valley. how can i tell you i gut people for a living.

that everything you say is likely to end up as evidence when i rewrite history.

over and over again.

how everything you do reminds me of something else, someone else.

how im humble and arrogant at the same time,

chased and never caught.

that i just want to stay up late and wake up early to talk to you.

that i want to show you all of my jealousy and insecurity and have you not care.

youre like a light switch and i just want to turn you on and watch them all shrink away.

the words come out of my fingertips on impulse. it is instinct. my head cant keep up.

i envy the comatose. i admire the bedridden.

i am addicted to the way i feel when i think of you.

"im blowing smoke rings around the moon...."

i wish i was the exact opposite of how the world knows me.

Posted by xoat 2:36 AM

July 11, 2006

we used to talk on the phone every single day (nooneknowshowitreallygoes).

its strange the way people will window shop on your life or score it for style and grace.

my personality and everything about me is just a carefully constructed collage of magazine articles and flashy pictures.

i am (not) real.

sometimes the days spent all by myself in my head are the scariest.

its enough to make you want to pack it up and call it a day.

all i can do is read and write and wait.

ihavecodedmessagesforyou.aretheygettingthrough.

Posted by xoat 6:32 PM

July 14, 2006

a little life, alot of death (i want to be known for my hits not my mrs.)

i should probably not be typing in this mood. i wish there was a lock on the keyboard. it is too enthralling in a state like this. just like all of this has always been. the world around me has changed as if overnight. "for someone so smart you are acting pretty stupid". i cant focus on but like three thoughts in my head but i am compeltely wrapped in them. they keep me warm at night. i pray for something to crash into me and smash me back to something more simple. i pray for fistfights so i cant be knocked out and wake up in the e.r. i wish for disaster so i can be razed. im telling you if i could do any of it again, im pretty sure i wouldnt.

fuck your life under the microscope.

fuck your conclusions.

you have no idea.

it never got me anywhere but here.

over and over again.

every single time.

i wish for five months ago. and not in the way you would imagine either. "you are unfixable". my eyes are washed out but they dont feel clean. they are strong you know not the athletic type, but could definitely used to carrying heavy bags. im guessing in any real light i will delete this, apologies in advance. whatever caption is written next to the picture is the exact opposite of me. i am mapless. you are caught. lets go out and get forgotten.

bad news travels fast. and i am the worst of it.

i will always remember the day i met you.

"leave you feelings in your heart boy".

Posted by xoat 12:57 AM

July 22, 2006

“my phone cuts out in the same place every single day ("the gospel of gossip").”

it feels like there is so much to say.but it can only be said in songs.please dont go so quickly."The city with fires of night seemed an archipelagoWomen asked the love and for the dulieBut in my eyes of male horror I rememberThe busy ones of the evening were never prettyThen the day returned but sometimes without sunTo draw up the houses coast at coast at the edge of streetsWhere our lives with the other smilar lives are mislaidLives trailing their shade while passing in the streetIntercalated in the year they was widowed daysBloody and slow Fridays of burialsWhite and whole blacks come from the skies which cryWhen the woman of the devil beat her lover"guillame appolinairesend me a flashlight. i cant seem to find my faith.iwishicould.posted by xo @ 2:17 PM

July 23, 2006

“we used to talk on the phone every single day (nooneknowshowitreallygoes)”

its strange the way people will window shop on your life or score it for style and grace.my personality and everything about me is just a cerfully constructed collage of magazine articles and flashy pictures.i am (not) real.the puppy is purple after spilling a grape soda on himself. he then ate the tropic of cancer by miller. paperback, so i guess it went down easier.sometimes the days spent all by myself in my head are the scariest.its enough to make you want to pack it up and call it a day.all i can do is read and write and wait.ihavecodedmessagesforyou.aretheygettingthrough.posted by xo @ 8:32 PM

July 26, 2006

you spend every waking moment and many sleeping ones thinking of one heart, one person. you let it slip, they let it slip. who knows where it all begins or ends. but as it falls to pieces you keep grabbing them and collecting them less like for a museum of things that used to matter and more like you are going to keep putting it back together. except there are akways a few pieces missing each time. deep breaths. slow your heart beat. the road winds. there was a time before you always felt like this. try to remember pete. you are being pulled in every direction. everything is bigger under the microscope. you want it to be simple. you make it complicated. "hey, pete- i am middle ground. how come we've never met before". sometimes i wish i could re-engineer the path from my heart to the tip of my tongue and let my head have a shot at it. i dont got bigdreams, i just want to be okay. it comes down to my word versus your word versus the worlds word and i dont think i want to anymore. im worn out. my head is full, my eyes are empty. the dog loves the salt in the corners of my eyes and on my cheeks- i am nervous about cutting it from his diet. and i could and should be, and jealous of it, from the children on the street walking hand in hand with their mothers to the homeless man content with his world of a bench. and noone knows the way i spend my nights counting the individuals grains in the tiles in the bathroom, the coolness of the floor the only comfort- or if anyone does they dont want to ehar it, i cant blame you... i dont even want to hear it anymore. in the mornings the world is blurry. it comes in and out of focus. this is when im the worst. when i awake from a dream to realize that none of it was real possibly ever.one of the things stranger than realizing you are alone in this world is realizing that you are not.pupils the size of baby worlds.every bad decision is put on file for later viewing. mapquest your way back to me, take a turn for the worse and then continue for .5 miles.i want to file a restraining order against myself.and i want to be myself again looking at my reflection in your eyes from the first time i failed you. i am nostalgic for disaster. i want it back.he sleeps sound. he has no care for what buzzes and changes in the world around him.because of this i envy him.run away from a city because of one single heartbeat. it doesnt make sense.its not that i dont trust you, actually it is. and i dont trust myself when i think of you. i sell myself out.i wish you were awake right now. i just want to let myself be happy.posted by xo @ 3:53 AM

July 28, 2006

as i run away from everything i have ever known. just whisper in my ear."and the tears come streaming down your facewhen you lose something you can't replacewhen you love some one but it goes to wastecould it be worse?Lights will guide you homeAnd ignite your bonesAnd I will try to fix youHigh up above or down belowWhen you're too in love to let it goBut if you never try you'll never knowJust what you're worthLights will guide you home"so obvious. so much more brilliant than i could ever imagine to be.be bright and shine. its dark. im sorry ive come so off course.tell the pilot to clear us to land in your backyard.posted by xo @ 11:02 PM

July 30, 2006

regardless of what stars i end up under- for the best and for the worst-you have made me who i am. and i try to make myself more decent and better only because of you.happybirthday.posted by xo @ 3:05 PM

[lanseditcorner]

I can't believe none of u guys are talking abt the new twst wuxia gacha with SSR Deuce, SR Ace, SR Jade, and R Neige😔😔

Lol jk its just an edit, but anyways heres fullbody deuce

[strawberriianime]

Woman Get Busy

♡ timeskip! nahoya smiley kawata (tokyo revengers) x reader

♡ club setting, reader is a dancer / stripper

♡ warnings: semi-mature language & suggestive themes.

shake that thing miss

Reapplying your matte lipstick and with a quick brush over you where just about ready to go out. Glancing over at your phone, the clock read 11:22 meaning that the club was starting to get busier. Working day shifts aren't really your thing, considering you needed the money and the money pours in faster the later it is.

Grabbing your hair gel and a couple of bobby pins you where almost done completing your look. 

“SHIT!” a voice rang out causing your head to turn left.

“What’s wrong mom?” you asked finishing up your hair. No she wasn’t your biological mother, just your house mother.

“Mercadez just sprang her ankle so no dances on stage J until after 3.” she replied running a hand through her curly hair exiting out back.

Damnit! Stage J is where I usually work my magic, my regulars always come over that way. I most defiantly cant afford to wait until after 3.

Slipping on my pleasures, I took a final look at myself admiring the sheer nude set I had on. Grabbing my phone, and other items I placed them in my locker while stuffing my garter with a $50 bill.

Making my way through the back I spotted Len.

“There she is!” Len smiled at me as he mixed for a girl on stage.

“Hi Len, can you play something rhythmic for me tonight? Sadly, you wont be able to see tonight...I’ll be on stage C at 12:25.” I smiled handing him the $50 as he returned a smile.

“Sure thing Doll.” he chimed as I walked over to the bar.

Scanning the area, this section wasn’t too bad. It was quite full meaning hopefully you’d make a good amount of money. Looking at the clock on the wall it read 12:13 meaning you should be heading to the back in the next 2 minutes. Quickly downing my last shot, I strutted to the back. Time flew quickly and before I knew it, and it was my turn on stage. 

woman get busy, just shake that booty non-stop when the beat drops just keep swinging it

Letting out a deep breath I pushed the beaded curtains open making my way on stage. Hearing catcalls was nothing new here, you get use to it. 

Sensually, you made your way to the pole as you scanned the crowd from here. Making “eye” contact with a olive skinned man with pe achhair. Typically, you don’t get nervous but something about him made your stomach tighten.

Gripping the pole, you walked around a bit before going for a spin. You always executed your tricks flawlessly. Just as you went upside down, the money began to pour in. 1′s, 5′s, 10′s... You noticed that the guy with the curly hair had made his way closer. Hook and Sinker. 

It’s all good girl just turn me on

Sliding down the pole with a perfect split, you decided to seductively crawl on stage with your back perfectly arched. He was now sitting in the V.I.P section, which I must say isn’t cheap while also allowing you access physically to him. You stood on your knees, caressing your body as he leaned in with a smile. 

Taking a hundred dollar bill he stuffed it in your garter. His cool palm felt so good against your warm skin. You laid back in his direction, completely forgetting about the other people watching and arched your back up swinging your legs into a rolled over split. Raking in the bills once more. He smiled sipping his drink as his finger curled initiating you come his way. You leaned forward breast fully in display as he stuffed two hundred dollar bills in-between them. You stood up winking at him as the song was soon about to end, making your way around to collect money from the others. 

With one final trick, your stage was over. Luckily, there is someone who rakes all your money for you and put it in a bag. You where sure you had made your goal or if not close to it. Looking around you found a bag labeled “Baby Doll” and showed the guard your ID allowing you to collect your money. As you made your way to the locker rooms you couldn’t help but think about the peach haired guy. 

Taking a seat you began counting your money up, bringing in $528 off of your first stage, which is a record. You usually do 1-2 stages and a couple dances, VIP’s or champange rooms.

“There you are!” Mom came running through the door caressing my face. “You did amazing we never seen that side of you before.” she added making my face flush is slight embarrassment. No matter how many times I get complimented I always end up flushed.

“There’s someone who want’s a $800 V.I.P room with you!” she smiled shaking my body.

“Oh my, whats the room number?” I asked grabbing my hair brush and going over the flying strands.

“525″ she spoke as she made her way out “Goodluck he’s big money for sure!”

I decided to change into something new. Walking over to my locker, I opened it and decided on a lace black set which came with shorts, push up bra and a cute black thong. I also grabbed a pack of baby wipes, perfume, spray deodorant and placed my money inside before locking it up.

Making way to the bathrooms, I freshened up feeling somewhat better than before. Looking at the time, without a doubt the man was waiting on me. Locking up my belongings once more I walked down to room 525. Placing my hand on the door I pushed the door opened only to be greeted with that familiar smile.

“Hi there Baby Doll why don’t you come sit on my lap?”

woman don’t sweat it

✰

Hiiii, sorry it’s short I wrote it while listening to get busy and watching stripper vlogs LOLL. 

Part 2 maybe ?? *eye emoji* 

[rinzis]

what your favourite genshin impact character says about you: no holding back edition

i’m finally allowed to post again!!! great joy

aether/lumine: you’re basic as hell sorry . also stop fighting over who the better twin is they’re literally the same person but different genders. you’re pretty fun to be around ig but i feel like you eat food off the floor. 5 second rule not 5 hour rule ok

amber: ok i’ve actually met a bunch of people whose fav is amber and you guys are actually really sweet but pls learn when to stfu you’re so loud . also you guys go feral whenever someone (everyone else in the fandom) says amber sucks like chill bae

kaeya: jesus fucking christ your horny is off the scale. every kaeya stan i’ve ever met cant keep it in their pants. and we know the only reason you like him is bc of his giga bouncer supreme ultra man rack 3000. stop saying you want him to smother you with his tits. get some help.

lisa: YOU GUYS ARE COOL AS HELL!!!!!! as someone who relates to lisa you’re very cool. most chill people to be around and you’re definitely super smart. not lazy but just reserved. 11/10. oh btw do you use her for climbing?

diluc: do you have daddy issues? you guys definitely have a thing for the tsundere archetype and you probably like zhongli too. just admit you want diluc to do the kabedon thing on you and move on. we know what you’re like. also how does it feel being so short? i swear every diluc stan is small as hell

jean: YOU GUYS are so sweet pls whenever i play co op with a jean main it’s just like wow you’re so strong and nice and thanks for healing my entire team wow........ however although you’re so responsible you probably enjoy cancelling people on twitter for fun . sorry

venti: VENTI STANS. I LOVE YOU. is it partially because i myself am a huge venti stan? yeah no. you probably missed out on his first banner and are saving for his rerun..... same......... anyways you guys give off the best vibes n it’s always so fun to be with you. i love you all

razor: i have one question for you guys . did you either like warrior cats or were you a wolf kid?

albedo: you guys are so smart wtf !!!!!!!!! you’re so rational in co op mode too and if you have albedo you probably use him as a sub dps for your teammates bc you’re so good at reading situations........ then again you also have some weird shit going on like cmon it’s milk after cereal you psychopaths

sucrose: you either kin sucrose or are creepy sorry . ok but she’s so underrated like her passive 3........ WOAH.............. you definitely use her in spiral abyss,,, also are you a burnout successful kid who used to kiss teachers’ asses and middle school was a breeze before getting to college/university and realising that professors don’t give a shit anymore? wow who would have guessed

diona: wannabe catgirls assemble! please move on from your warrior cats phase you’re almost as bad as the razor stans but you’re adorable too. you probably want qiqi or klee but don’t have them so you’re settling for diona

barbara: thanks for healing my team in co op barbara stans !!!! you guys are genuinely so nice omg thank you for being so reliable all the time,,, do you highlight your notes so it’s more art than notes? yeah that’s what i thought

mona: ok if no one else is gonna say it i will,,, no one understands shit about your astrology thing going on. i’m a caprisun? great

bennett: YOURE ALL ADORABLE. thanks for helping us out in co op!!!! you definitely advocate for bennett rights and yes pls do,,,, we all love benny deep down!!!! you either don’t have him or have him at like C218372

fischl: jojo stans

just kidding but you all probably act like fischl irl. also did you have an emo phase

klee: ok if your favourite is klee you definitely don’t have her . waiting patiently for klee’s rerun!!!! shes just so adorable and so are you guys,,,,, so fun to be around !!!!! you probably have diluc and hate him

noelle: you guys....... the rarest of the rare. you love trying to convince people that she’s a great healer dps n everything else...... no bae you probably use her because you like geo and claymores like hmm yes i will now hit things hard with my big sword and rock power

ok onto liyue now sweats nervously

childe: you guys are ALL simps. ALL OF YOU. go n touch some grass bro!!!!! you either think he’s super sexy or you bully him and make the ed sheeran jokes (not funny) . you follow griffin burns on tiktok too dont you

zhongli: you either love him for his gentle demeanour or you want him for his fat giga dumptruck 3000. make up your minds!!!!! you guys are so clueless in co op mode but you’re hilarious. you probably have his energy recharge at like 200% so you can use his ult and hear I WILL HAVE ORDER every 4 seconds

xiao: STOP GROWLING AT PEOPLE. every xiao main is so aggressive not joking . yeah the only reason you saved for him is because you want to stare at him all day n listen to him growling . you guys genuinely scare me . no he would not hold ur hand and do cute things with you,,,,,, if given half the chance he’d probably decapitate you

ningguang: alright jeff bezos, hand over the cash. yeah so you’re either rolling in it or want to be her sugar baby. but you guys have such an intimidating aura like playing with ning mains is just .... you always build her so well she’s an absolute tank!!!!!! thanks for scaring the shit out of me but also protecting me

beidou: YOU GUYS. you’re fun to be around but i also feel like you could probably destroy me in 3 seconds flat !!!!!!!! do you hate diluc too? i love playing with you guys because all i hear is TO ASHES every 2 seconds and she’s just cool as hell so yeah i really like beidou stans. i feel like you all have her so congrats

qiqi: you’re so cute,,,,, best healer !!!! you probably love playing qiqi because her skills look so cool and you prefer playing heal/support,, if you don’t have her you just love her bc she’s so tiny . spoiler alert but do you have a thing against xiao for killing her lol

xiangling: you’re so chaotic help,, you definitely pair her with xinyan too because you give off the most uncontrollable vibes,,,,,,, did you level her to use her in the spiral abyss or do you just think polearms are neat and don’t have xiao or zhongli

xinyan: please reread xiangling paragraph but replace polearm with claymore . you like either bring me the horizon or bubblegum pop there’s no in between

chongyun: you’re all the nicest people ever and you’re so chill . you love chongyun with your whole hearts and i adore you !!!!!! the animation of him eating the popsicle melts your hearts (no pun intended) and you just think he’s really cool :( ily all

xingqiu: chongyun vibes but make it kinda unnerved . burnout successful kids 2.0 ,,,,, are you clever too? you also love xingqiu and believe he’s worthy of being a 5 star with his heal and damage reduce !!!!! he’s so helpful wtf and so are you . please stop going on about his legs though it’s highkey weird asf

keqing: COOL PERSON SYNDROME! i main this gal so i love you all . do you get as mad as i do when people say she doesn’t deserve to be a 5 star? yeah . are you a procrastinator and try and take lessons from keqing but are just so lazy? do you use her teleport because you can’t be bothered to climb mountains? yeah that’s what i thought

ganyu: you’re all the nicest people alive and i adore you all . thanks for being so kind in co op mode . every ganyu main i’ve met is so sweet and you’re all so powerful too woah....... you hate the cocogoat jokes too >:( pls mihoyo give her more attention !!!!!

scaramouche: you have rights guys we know you exist. also we know you want him to be playable. we know that you think his hat is neat. we know you love this shawty but please be quiet.

signora: wait you guys exist

hu tao: you prank people for fun like pls stop im so on edge when youre around . plus i feel you laugh at videos of babies falling over n shit,,,,,,, you cant wait for her banner but also please shut the fuck up

dainsleif: please leave me the fuck alone we did 1 (one) quest with him and you’re all obsessed with him . ok second hand dmitri from fire emblem you want a medal for being a fucking simp?

[untitledarea]

Untitled's Prompt Writing - Generic

This 1/3 list of Prompts that I would like to do writing on Steve Harrington (I know, I'm biased. Sue Me.)

18/1/23 - Change of plans more bois are coming into the picture 😆

All of the lists will be credited to @justforshitsandcackles - I just changed some of them to fit to the universes I will write about. I'll roll a dice thrice to know who will I do the story about, what genre and number I do.  

There will be no requests, but I could change my mind over time :3

1.     “You know we’re meant to be.”

2.     “The thought of losing you scares me.”

3.     “Would you just shut up and kiss me already?”

4.     “You’re staring again.”

5.     “Wow. you look stunning.”

6.     “What are you doing here? It’s late.”

7.     “I missed you so much.”

8.     “Don’t smile at me like that. You know it drives me crazy.”

9.     “Mine.”

10.   “I’m going to marry you one day.”

11.   “You cant banish me! This is my bed/bedroom too!”

12.   “You’re seriously like a man-child.”

13.   “Stop being so cute.”

14.   “I feel like i cant breathe when i’m around you.”

15.   “It was a joke, baby. I swear.”

16.   “Are you seriously giving me the silent treatment?”

17.   “Will you just hold me?”

18.   “What do you have behind your back?”

19.   “Not to toot my own horn or anything, but the dog loves me more.”

20.   “You look really good in my sweater.”

21.   “No, i’m not letting you go. It’s too early to get out of bed.”

22.   “I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

23.   “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.”

24.   “Lets just stay in bed.”

25.   “Is that my shirt?”

26.   “No, like..its just, i cant believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.”

27.   “Can you stop playing connect the dots with my freckles?”

28.   “Are you planning to stay glued to my side the whole day?”

29.   “Wow- you look…amazing.”

30.   “I’m not jealous! Its just..you’re mine!”

31.   “You snuck into my room, at 4am…to cuddle?”

32.   “This is gonna sound cheesy but….I love when you’re half asleep and talking nonsense.”

33.   “What? No! I wasn’t staring…I-I was looking at something behind you!”

34.   “Stop being so cute.”

35.   “Tell me again.”

36.   “Can’t you stay a little longer?”

37.   “Because i love you god damnit!”

38.   “Wait a minute.. are you jealous?”

39.   “I really want to kiss you right now.” || “Then do it.”

40.   “I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.”

41.   “I heard that!” || “You were supposed to!”

42.   “I turned out liking you a lot more than i originally planned.”

43.   “Even when we were kids, i always kicked your ass!”

44.   “Why should we date?” || “Because we’re attracted to each other.” || “I’m attracted to pie, but i do not feel the need to date pie.”

45.   “Where have you been all my life?” || “Hiding from you.”

46.   “Somehow, i always seem to end up here. With you.” || “Soulmate shit, it’s hardcore as hell.”

47.   “I love you.” || “Thats nice.”

48.   “How do i look?”

49.   “If i didn’t know you better, i’d say you were trying to flirt by giving me books.”

50.   “No! It’s your turn!”

51.   “Enjoying the view, beautiful?”

52.   “Be careful, he’s so sweet you might get diabetes.”

53.   “I cant sleep without you. I need my personal body heater and cuddles.”

54.   “How am i supposed to spoil you when you wont accept my gifts?”

55.   “While i do enjoy the silent treatment, i wasn’t aware i had done anything to you.”

56.   “What, you’ve never thought about us?”

57.   “Why is your hand sweating so much?”

58.   “So, we’re just going to ignore the fact that you drunk-dialed me to tell me you love me?”

59.   “Im pretty sure your mom hates me.”

60.   “You’re such a fun drunk.”

61.   “Since my dog likes you then i guess i like you.”

62.   “Tell them to fuck off.”

63.   “It’s six o’clock in the morning, you’re not having vodka.”

64.   “I want to strangle you 99% of the time.”

65.   “Could you not suck for five minutes?”

66.   “The ladies love a guy who’s good with kids.”

67.   “You can’t banish me! This is my bed/bedroom too!”

68.   “You’re seriously like a man-child.”

69.   “Well thats tragic.”

70.   “I’m too sober for this.”

71.   “You are actually insane!”

72.   “I think you’re actually satan.”

73.   “It’s like -50 degrees in here.”

74.   “Laugh at my jokes! They’re funny and you know it!”

75.   “Sorry isn’t going to help when i kick your ass!”

76.   “Don’t let one of them electrocute themselves or something.”

77.   “Holy shit! That thing is huge!”

78.   “Don’t kink shame me.”

79.   “I hope i’m never stuck with you on a deserted island.”

80.   “I just cleaned that!”

81.   “Don’t get sassy with me!”

82.   “What do you have behind your back?”

83.   “If you interrupt me one more time, so help me god.”

84.   “Not to toot my own horn or anything, but the dog loves me more.”

85.   “I’m going to put on some clothes before you say anything else.”

86.   “Bite me.”

87.   “If you insist.”

88.   “Im not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

89.   “I need you to be my fake girlfriend/boyfriend.”

90.   “Can you stop playing connect the dots with my freckles?”

91.   “You snuck into my room, at 4am..to cuddle?”

92.   “If we get caught i’m blaming you.”

93.   “What? No! I wasn’t staring..i-i was looking at something behind you!”

94.   “I locked the keys in the car.”

95.   “This is why we can’t have nice things.”

96.   “Wait a minute. Are you jealous?”

97.   “Define normal.”

98.   “Do i get bonus points if i act like i care?”

99.   “Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and i don’t speak english.”

100.    “Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.”

101.    “And you wonder why you’re single.”

102.    “Remind me to kill you. Please.”

103.    “I’m listening to you. I’m just not paying attention.”

104.    “She’s crazy. and just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, theres a crazy underground garage.”

105.    “Sorry. I don’t speak skank.”

106.    “My middle finger salutes you.”

107.    “I don’t think i could ever stab someone. I mean, lets be honest, i can barely get the straw in the capri sun.”

108.    “I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how i feel.”

109.    “Somebodys cranky.”

110.    “Somebody needs to shut up.” 

111.    “All due respect but thats a bunch of crap.”

112.    “I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.”

113.    “Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.”

114.    “What did i tell you about calling him/her the devil?”

115.    “That it’s offensive to the devil?”

116.    “I heard that!”

117.    “You were supposed to!”

118.    “I’m not weird. I’m limited edition.”

119.    “If history repeats itself, i am so getting a dinosaur.”

120.    “You seem somewhat familiar. have i threatened you before?”

121.    “Even when we were kids, i always kicked your ass!”

122.    “Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.”

123.    “Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.”

124.    “She’s hot, but she’s evil.”

125.    “Do i regret it? Yes. Would i do it again? Probably.”

126.    “You’re going to burn in a very special level in hell. A level they reserve for child molesters, animal abusers, and people who talk at the theater.”

127.    “I’m not a damsel in distress. i’m a damsel doing damage.”

128.    “Sometimes i question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.”

129.    “Why should we date?”

130.    “Because we’re attracted to each other.”

131.    “I am attracted to pie, but i do not feel the need to date pie.”

132.    “Why does everyone assume the worst of me.”

133.    “It saves time.”

134.    “You’ve successfully cured him/her of anything interesting about his/her personality.”

135.    “Neither one of us is drunk enough for this conversation.”

136.    “Wow somebody needs a happy meal.”

137.    “I didn’t do it!”

138.    “Then why are you laughing?”

139.    “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.”

140.    “Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.”

141.    “You couldn’t handle me even if i came with instructions.”

142.    “Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.”

143.    “I’m so glad you could come.”

144.    “Cut the crap. give me a drink.”

145.    “Where have you been all my life?”

146.    “Hiding from you.”

147.    “I can tell that you think what you’re saying is funny, but...no.”

148.    “If you pull out my earphones, i will pull out your lungs.”

149.    “Ah, he’s playing hard-to-get. thats cute.”

150.    “I feel like a freakin’ soccer mom.”

151.    “My ex? Yeah id still hit that. Except this time it would be with a car or a baseball bat.”

152.    “Such big evil in such a little thing.”

153.    “For the love of fuck.”

154.    “Yep, thats me. i love to fuck.”

155.    “Are you ready to go?”

156.    “Yeah. let me grab my machete.”

157.    “We’re going to sephora. no machetes needed.”

158.    Clears throat seriously, “Yas bitch.”

159.    “No road trip is complete without the snacks. So go in there and buy everything you can fit in a tiny cart.”

160.    “I’m all for making you miserable by being insufferable, but unfortunately i have things to do today.”

161.    “Come on, you can help me make conspiracy theories. If you make an especially good one, ill pay for dinner.”

162.    “You know what? Why not? I haven’t ruined my life yet this week. Lets go.”

163.    “Do these dark circles under my eyes say nothing to you about how i am doing?”

164.    “If i didn’t know you better, id say you were trying to flirt by giving me books.”

165.    “What are you talking about? Im hilarious!”

166.    “Duct tape? Duct tape is not going to fix this!”

167.    “What did you think? That you were going to fight him?”

168.    “You’re blocking the view.”

169.    “I am the view.”

170.    “Why are you on the floor?”

171.    “Tying my shoe.”

172.    “You’re wearing rain-boots.”

173.    “Cant stop me from slaying!”

174.    “Close your eyes and imagine it, all the dogs in the world.”

175.    “Be careful, he’s so sweet you might get diabetes.”

176.    “Would you reconsider if i was sober?”

177.    “Stop running i’m wearing flip flops!”

178.    “Why are you holding your boobs?”

179.    “I wouldn’t call it stalking, more like far distance admiring.”

180.    “You need to stop making her laugh! you’re ruining her makeup!”

181.    “I’m sure i can get some kind of sexual gratification from just staring at him if i try hard enough.”

182.    “I’m not sure if its a sexual thing or not.”

183.    “I’m either in the mood for french fries or to rip someone’s head off. Hmmm. decisions, decisions.”

184.    “If you’re not out of the shower in the next five minutes, i’m going to cut your fucking hair off to make your life quicker.”

185.    “No, i will not dress up as a chicken.”

186.    “I never told my extended family that we broke up, and now they want to know when you’re coming over for dinner again.”

187.    “I need a date to my relatives wedding, and i’ve already asked literally everyone else i know, so i know you probably hate me, but please say yes. Otherwise they’ll try to set me up with someone, and they have awful taste.”

188.    “One more sound and i swear to-”

189.    “Sometimes when (name) texts me, i just pretend they didn’t so i don’t have to respond.”

190.    “You gave our pigeon boyfriend the wrong beans!”

191.    “If i’m like 50 and still single, ill marry you because tax benefits.”

192.    “Please, never have children.”

193.    “I know its like 11pm, but i’m on my way to your house with nacho fries.”

194.    “Sometimes i wish i was gay so i wouldn’t have to deal with all these dumbass boys.

195.    “You know, would’ve been nice if you told me your whole ass family was coming to this dinner! I look like a troll.”

196.    “Im going to the party to pet the dog, no thanks drugs.”

197.    “I hope in college i get some excuse to deck him. Maybe with a bottle or something, ill wing it and be like “oops, sorry shithead, my hand slipped.”

198.    “What is this shit...i’m just trying to graduate.”

199.    “Ooo, i sense attitude in your tone.”

200.    “Guess who only got two hours of sleep? Me, lol, i’m gonna die.“

201.    “I’m gonna strangle you.”

202.    “Is that a threat or a promise?”

203.    “Superheroes aren’t allowed in my house, especially after they’ve destroyed my living room. go away.”

204.    “oh you’re coming. even if i have to drag you through the snow in your pajamas.”

205.    “i swear you’re gonna end up getting like botox in your tits or something.”

206.    “well i mean-”

207.    “whAT DO YOU MEAN?!”