#i cant think of anything else right now im going to bed goodnight

[cali]

How do you make art for yourself snd not for likes? I like sharing what I make because Im proud of it, but when it consistently gets 0-3 likes it kinda makes me second guess myself

i do it by having pushed the social media aspect as far back on my list of reasons of why i make art by reminding myself of how hard it sucks and how much better all the other reasons to make art are. best tip is be in love with ur own art. thats number 1 tip be in love love love with it. also make art with ur friends and for ur friends and care 100x about what they think than someone random. heres some reasons for why likes suck: like money and most any other accruable type of wealth, social media engagement fortune has that no end goal-way to it.- u wont ever have enough. there is allllllwayyys more people with higher numbers to compare urself to, that spells demons, theres demons in that. engagement and likes is also just a bad measure of how good something is in a true "art" sense. go to any sites art explore page and look at the most vapid frontpage art shit there. good stuff among it but a lot of it is kind of evil to me and feels more like a design excercise in engineering soemthing that people will click like button on but not something that is actually artistically "better" than most other things. vague vibes type example sorry. its a measure of how well u can play the social media game.

[jackmanbj]

is this real?

jack was at the studio and you were walking around the house, you couldn’t figure out why you were experiencing weird cravings but you thought something was up being as though you’ve been extremely tired and not feeling the best when you woke up

later on you went to the store to get all the things you were craving and decided to get a pregnancy test while you were there

once you got back you ate almost all your snacks and went to your bathroom to use the pregnancy test

after waiting a few minutes thinking about what jack would do if you were really pregnant being as though he didnt even tell the world about you and you had only been together about two years, hell you didnt even know if jack wanted to propose.

after about five minutes you finally bought yourself to look at the text

“| |”

your heart dropped, you wanted a baby, and you wanted a family with jack but you didnt know if he was ready.. what if he kicked you out or tried to make you get rid of the baby

you thought if he would try and do that he didnt deserve you or your baby. you went back to the store and got a little box, pacifier and a note

on the note you wrote “i know you dont know me yet but i already love you, cant wait to see you daddy!” in strict cursive

you placed the box on his side of the bed and went on your phone, you decided not to tell anyone until jack found out

-

it had been about an three more hours and you had basically forgotten about the whole thing, until jack walked through the door

you felt nervous but quickly but your phone down and went to meet jack at the door

“hey sweet girl, i missed you” jack said placing a kiss on your lips “hi baby, can we go take a bath im really tired” “of course” he took off his shoes right at the end of the rug and made his way to the bathroom after you, not noticing whats on the bed

he ran some water and got in opening his arms to you you got in and sat on top of him giving him a deep kiss jack tried to stick his tongue in but you backed up

“unt unt, no sir, you need to go to bed you’ve been working for the past 9 hours” “you’re no fun.” once the water got cold you both got up and you put on some boxers and a bra, deciding not to put anything else on

jack changed into sweet pants with nothing else on jack was crawling into the bed but quickly seen the closed box “baby whats this?” “open it” you whispered jack looked at the box then back at you then back at the box before opening it “are..is, is this real..?” you started tearing up as jack got up picked up up and spun you

“im going to be a fucking dad!!” all doubt you had went away as you started giggling “jackk! put me downn!” jack carefully placed you down and got on his knees rubbing and kissing your now growing belly

“he baby.. i cant wait to see you, your gonna look like me i can tell” “no! there gonna look like me” “whateverrr, its my seed” “JACK!” you both laughed and crawled into bed

you held your arms out to jack and he cuddled into you

“goodnight baby” he started rubbing your belly “goodnight j” “mm i love you both” “we love yo more jj”

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

Ok all is well gooenight. No walk tmrw. Mahbe a shower. Made jyself food. Wont be able to have snacks but. I will have 3 meals. Hopefully my parents go out soemtime tmrw so i can say hi to Jack. Did say hi while making tmrws food but hes in his silly mood so he doesnt wanna sleep in my bed tonight. Shcih is ok i think hes tired of probably bwing crushed to death while im asleep. He did get pissed when i took bacon out the fridge tho and didnt givehim any. And then he wanted to playfight with me but i had too many things in my hand so coulsnt :( its ok tho we both sleepy now hight night. Sleep tight. Dont let the bed bugs bite. Bc if they do. Ull get a rlly itchy bite somewhere on ur body. And itll suck bc itll moet likely b a spider bite. But not even a cool onenlike spider man. A boring one that ifches and stings. And ur like. Come kn spiderssss i dont even move u from my room unlessyourereallubig and thisis how u repay meeeee come onnnnn. And then if its on ur lehs ur fucked forevwr. Anywyas. Goodnight. All is well. Last night i dreamt of going to mexico but all the food there being south east asian for some reason. And it was all sims2 quality so i couldnt even see what anything was but i knew it was south east asian bc everyone was saying it was. But we were also in mexico but they refused 2 serve mexican food. And when i tried some it all tasted the same. It was like. Vegetables. All the kinds i dint like. But everythign tasted like that. And i was like :( im a picky eater i cant have anything here. And the person next to me who coulsve been anyone i dont remembee the ppl in my dreams unless theyre significant oike that one time charlie sliemcicle was tnere and he shouted donde esta el slimecicle. Which seemed redundant as he was right there saying that. But that was significant. Anhwways there was a person next to me who jightve been a middle aged woman i think. And she said that i nad to pickSOMETHING unless itd be rude. Oh hea we were like jn a sorta market thing but. It was rlly cramped like. Single file everywhere. And we were in these sorta carriages??? Or boats. Idk. It was basicallt a mix of like so many things but i knew we were in mexico for the same reason i knew tne food was south east asian bc i just Did it was just a Fact. Anyway s. The woman next to me told me i was rlly selfish for not picking any food to eat. Anddd i dont remember much else. Tonight i will dream of. A pool. Might be another drowning dream. I drown a lot in dreams. Goodnight

[negandarylsatisfaction]

[SUMMARY: Negan becomes obsessed with his mistress.]

Smut

Negan and Malia

Negan lay beside you smoking his cigarette as you lay on his chest. The two of you had just finished having wild sex as you usually did. You loved when he came over but you always hated when he had to leave.

"When are you going to bring me to your house?"

"Malia. We've already had this conversation before." He took another hit of the cigarette before putting it out.

"I know but theres always some kind of excuse. We either come to my house or a hotel and we've been dating for six months." Negan sighed as he rubbed your back before you looked up at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Any other man would've-"

"Dont fucking tell me what any other man would do with you cause you're not with any other damn man. You're with me."

Negan turned very serious, he hated even the mention of you being with someone else.

"Let me start going." He stood up leaving you naked in bed under the covers. You sighed as he went to the bathroom before hearing his phone buzz. Usually you wouldnt allow yourself to look at it but things had been too weird. Looking back up at the bathroom door you reached for his phone and found it to be unlocked. There was a text message from a woman named Lucille.

"Meet me at the hospital for my appointment, I'll be there till 4. I love you." You whispered the text message to yourself feeling your heart sink. Scrolling back to old messages you realized they lived together, Negan had a girlfriend? Anger started to rise in you as you went further and further each message telling you more before realizing, Negan didnt have a girlfriend...he was married.

The sound of the toilet flushing made you quickly look up and place the phone back where it was. You knew he had been lying about something but you had no idea it was to this extent. Standing up from the bed you began to get dressed as he came out of the bathroom fully dressed himself.

"And where the hell are you going?" He asked as he looked at you strangely.

"Where are you going?" You asked with a raised brow.

"I told you. I had some errands to run." He looked you dead in the eye with lies.

"With Lucille?" You placed your hand on your hip, you could tell by his expression you caught him off guard. Without saying a word he looked back at his phone then back to you.

"Yeah, I saw your stupid messages. Your wife is waiting for you at the hospital." You emphasized on the word wife, he could see you were angry, you were fuming.

"Sweetheart," he smirked.

"Dont sweetheart me, you lying piece of shit. You're married, you're fucking married."

"Listen Malia, it's been complicated." Negan spoke back with a tone you didnt like.

"Complicated? You had me as a damn mistress-"

"You're not a mistress." He raised his voice cutting you off.

"I think you need to go."

"We'll talk about this when I get back."

"I dont want you coming back." You shot back with a straight face.

"Well that's too damn bad, I said we'll talk about it when I get back." Negan walked past you leaving you in shock. You couldnt believe this man had the nerve to act this way. All this time he had someone else, all this time hes lived with another woman, you felt more rage than anything.

That night you wanted nothing but to go out for a drink, to hell with Negan. You put on a tight black dress and got yourself ready to go out and have fun at the local bar in town. Negan had been blowing up your phone but you didnt care. The second you texted him telling him that you wanted this relationship to be over, he flipped. Sitting down at the bar you already had a handsome man approach you and offer you a drink. The two of you hit it off laughing together as you continued to feel your phone buzz. The man sitting with you went to use the restroom as you sat smiling to yourself feeling good. In your own world, you hadn't noticed Negan enter the bar. Angrily he searched the place for you before spotting you sitting by yourself in a corner.

"You wanna answer your fucking messages?" You gasped to find Negan beside you.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I can say the same for you, sweetheart." He knew exactly where to find you as this was the same place the two of you had met.

"Negan, I told you we are done." Your response making him chuckle.

"I beg to differ, Malia." Just as you were about to respond the man you were flirting with all night sat beside you.

"Everything alright?" He asked making Negan give him a threatening glare.

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Negan, stop it." You got nervous as the other man stood up defensively.

"I'm buying a drink for this fine woman, you got a problem?"

"This fine ass woman is my woman, so yeah I have a fucking problem. Let's go, Malia." Negan pulled out your chair and grabbed your arm.

"What the hell are you doing?!" You tried pulling your arm back but he wouldnt let go.

"Listen man she doesnt have to go with you if she doesnt want to."

"Hey asshole, I suggest you mind your fucking business." Negan practically pulled you off the chair and dragged you out the bar.

"Let go of me!" You screamed in the parking lot making him finally release you.

"Get in the fucking car, we're going home."

"I'm not going home, I dont wanna talk to you." You crossed your arms turning away from him.

"Sweetheart, I'm giving you one more chance. Get in the car."

"No." You responded flatly making him sigh before he suddenly picked you up and threw you over his shoulder.

"Stop it! Put me down!" You kicked but he held onto you tightly and sat you in the passenger seat of his truck.

"I gave you a chance to come here on your own didnt I?"

"You're crazy!" You screamed as you adjusted yourself on the seat eventually giving up.

"Oh I know." Negan climbed into the driver's seat and started the car before driving off. Angrily you remained silent looking out the window as you pulled down your dress. Negan looked over at you and licked his lips before looking back at the road.

"You look sexy." You didnt say a word to him as you remained looking away from him.

"Come on, baby. Why do you have to be so stubborn?" You took a deep breath clearly annoyed by him just wanting to get home. Finally he drove into your drive way and quickly you got out as he followed.

"Woah woah woah, I dont get a goodnight kiss?" You scoffed in disbelief.

"I cant believe you. Negan just go home, me and you are over."

"No we are not." He answered in a matter of fact tone.

"Malia, I love you."

"Unbelievable.." you muttered to yourself as he stepped closer.

"You think I dont love you? I left my damn wife at home to come find you because you didnt want to answer my damn messages." He raised his voice staring down at you.

"Oh, how romantic of you." You responded sarcastically before turning away from him and unlocking your door. Negan followed you inside as you shook off your high heels and threw your purse on the couch.

"You need to go."

"Im not leaving until we talk." You sighed in frustration before you turned to him.

"Fine, you wanna talk? Do you have any idea how many men I can have right now-"

"You be very careful where you're going with that, sweetheart." Negan cut you off slowly walking towards you.

"Oh please, I need to be careful with what I say? I was so close to getting fucked tonight by-"

"Hey!" He roared loudly making you jump. You swallowed nervously as he took another step closer looking down at you.

"No ones fucking you but me." A mixture of anger and arousal at his words made you look away.

"So.." you cleared your throat speaking calmly.

"You get to screw all the women you want and I have to be just for you?"

"Who said I was screwing anyone else?" He asked in a low voice.

"Negan, you're married." You stared up af him in disbelief.

"Yeah well, things are complicated, baby."

You turned away from him not wanting to hear anything else when your phone began to ring.

"Who the fuck is calling you at this time?"

You looked down at your phone noticing the name of the man you had just been talking to at the bar.

"You've gotta be kidding me, dont tell me you gave that asshole your number?"

"Yes, Negan I did. So what? Look, I think you should go. I just want to get in bed."

"I wanna get in bed with you."

"No. I want to be alone."

Negan moved closer to you slowly placing his hands on your hips.

"Come on, baby. You're really gonna stay pissed at me?"

"Are you joking?" You looked up at him feeling annoyed before he unexpectedly aggressively pulled you against him making your body slam against his.

"Does it look like I'm joking?" How can you not be mad at him, was he insane?

"Just go okay? We'll talk tomorrow."

"Tomorrow." Negan agreed as his hands slowly fell from your hips.

Negan finally gave in, slamming the door loudly as he left for the night. Truth be told you didnt want to talk him or see him again. Who did he think you were, thinking youd be ok to be with a married man?

The next day at work you sat in your cubicle going over paperwork when one of your coworkers let you know your boyfriend was there.

"What?" You asked in shock and confusion when Negan appeared with a grin.

"Hey baby, I wanted to take you out for your lunch." You couldnt believe he had the nerve to show up and casually act like nothing had happened.

"Negan, I cant today. I have alot of work to catch up on." As you spoke, a male colleague of yours caught Negans eye, he noticed the man staring at your ass as he walked towards you from behind.

"Who's this asshole?" Negan asked you low making you turn to see your coworker, Peter approaching you.

"Peter, hi." You smiled, the sound of your voice excitedly saying another mans name made him look at you with deep furrowed brows.

"Good afternoon, gorgeous." The man reached in for a platonic kiss on the cheek with his hand on your waist making Negan tense up.

"Woah woah woah prick, keep your fucking hands to yourself."

"Negan." You turned to him bulging your eyes out.

"This is my boss." You spoke nervously as Negan chuckled.

"Oh wait, you're the boss that gave her that promotion a month back arent you? What you thought if you gave her a promotion youd get to tap that ass?"

"Negan! Peter...I'm so sorry-"

"Dont fucking be sorry for me, you dont see the way this asshole looks at you?" Negan responded angrily.

"Alright, Sir I'm gonna have to ask you to leave."

"I'm not going anywhere without my woman." Peter gave you a warning glare making you sigh.

Pulling Negan outside you shoved his shoulder back angrily.

"Enough is enough, this is done Negan. I cant be with you anymore."

"Malia-"

"No I dont want to hear what you have to say. This has gone too far."

"Malia, God dammit.. you belong to me." His lip quivered as he spoke with intensity, the thought of Peter or any other man coming close to you made him enraged.

"Negan, I mean it I'm done. Do not come in here again because if you do, Peter will call security. Just stop, go home to your wife." And with that you walked away from him leaving him pissed. Negan wasnt ready to leave you, he couldnt help the feelings that he had for you. Whether you wanted to believe it or not Negan felt he truly loved you.

You felt no matter what you said to Negan he always found a way to go against it. He was a stubborn and persistent man. He had a temper towards any man that came close to you, he didnt trust it. Although you had feelings for him you didnt want to be apart of the mess any longer. You felt sorry for his wife, you felt betrayed, you were still angry.

The next day you woke up to the sound of chaos outside your house. There was screaming, sirens, you even thought you heard a few gunshots. Looking out the window you saw people screaming and running, there was blood everywhere. You gasped when you saw one man bite another.

"What the hell's going on?" You whispered to yourself before running to the tv and noticing all channels had no signal.

"Shit." You muttered before turning to your phone and noticing seven missed calls from Negan and a lost signal. You had no idea what the hell was going on but you knew that although you had feelings for Negan, this was your chance to break free from his possessiveness. This was your chance to get away.

Two years down the road many things had changed around you. The world changed as you knew it, you lost touch of everyone you knew and began staying with a small group. These things that came out attacking people, these walkers...they were like nothing the world had faced before. The group you were with was talking about another group they ran into, they called themselves "the saviors". They were the new threat you were all facing and they found where you all resided. One of the men said they were coming today, they had some sort of offer but your friend didnt sound convinced that it was a good one.

"Shit, I see their cars coming." Your friend Lenny muttered as he over looked the road.

"Everyone take your places!" You stood behind one of houses in the road with your hand gun and waited for the cars to pull up. The men slowly started to come out seeming to be waiting for one last man to come out. Taking a deep breath you squinted your eyes aiming your gun when a man you had not seen in two years came into view.

It was Negan.

Your lips parted in shock as you slowly bought your gun down. He came out of the car with an arrogant look. You couldnt believe it was actually him, he was the leader of the Saviors?

"Fuck.." you whispered to yourself looking around, you couldnt let him see you. You didnt want him to see you. Without alerting your group you turned running inside one of the houses, Negan instantly catching the quick movement.

"Woah, who was that?"

"Who?" Lenny looked behind him knowing you were the only one there. Negan didnt say a word signaling for one of his men, Simon to take over of watch for him. Negan made his way to the house slowly opening the door, you heard him enter from where you were upstairs and cursed to yourself.

"Come out come out wherever you are." He taunted you with sarcastic playfulness. Quietly you hid in one of the bedrooms hiding yourself in the closet. Negan wasnt a stupid man and you knew this, you began to hear him slowly make his way up the stairs.

"Come on lady, you're only making this harder for yourself." He yelled out before you heard him enter the very room you were in. You squeezed your eyes shut as you heard him look around the room. Your finger on the trigger as he carefully observed his surroundings, he right away noticed the closet door cracked.

"Oh you're just making this too damn easy for me." You took a deep breath as he moved towards the closet, the floors squeaking loudly before he opened the door. Negan was stunned at the sight of you, his brows were deeply knitted together before a smirk slowly appeared.

"Well shit, look who it is."

Slowly you lifted up the gun aiming it directly at him, finger on the trigger.

"That's cute."

"Back up." You spoke in a stern voice. Negan did as you asked as you slowly stepped out of the closet showing your full self. His eyes excitedly checking you out from head to toe. Your shoulder length hair had grown down to the middle of your back, the color also lighter than what he remembered.

"You look good, Malia."

"What the hell are your people doing to my group?"

"Your group huh? Did your group tell you how they got caught stealing from mine?"

"Stealing?" You asked with a puzzled expression.

"Oh yeah, sweetheart. Stealing, now how about you put that gun down and we can have a normal conversation." You didnt say a word nor move a muscle as he looked straight at you.

"Come on, have I ever fucking hurt you?"

"Funny you ask." You responded sarcastically remembering when you found out he was cheating with you.

"Baby girl, that was a long time ago now." You stayed silent staring at him for a moment before slowly putting the gun down.

"Good girl." He responded with an excited tone as you glared at him.

"You should take your people and leave," you responded bluntly making him frown.

"And leave my pretty little flower after I've just found her? I think the fuck not."

"Malia! You okay in there?" You heard Lenny yell from outside.

"Yes, I'm fine Lenny." You screamed back out the window before turning back to Negan.

"Lenny huh?" He licked his bottom lip as he stepped closer to you.

"Is he fucking you?"

"Dont start," you placed your hand your hip making him look down at your body and grin.

"God I always loved when you did that cute little pose." You crossed your arms clearly annoyed by him.

"Wheres your wife anyway, shouldn't you be off with her?" You noticed the look in his eyes change and just by the look you could tell what had happened.

"I'm sorry." A piece of you actually felt sorry for him.

"Well....I'm gonna go-" you went to walk past him before he gently grabbed your arm.

"Come on, dont leave me now." He looked over at you as you looked at the ground with a sigh.

"What are you gonna run off to that prick Lenny?"

"God dammit, Negan. You're still the same way." Negan chuckled before turning you fully towards him.

"What the hell makes you think I'd be any different?" His expression turning into a straight face.

"You dont think I've spent days wondering what the fuck happened to you? Wondering if you were still alive? You think now that I've found you I'll let any man take you from me?" You looked up at him speechlessly. His territorial ways were far from gone but a part of you did actually miss him. You shook your head looking away making him get closer to you.

"Tell me you didnt fucking miss me." Negan spoke aggresivly getting closer to you as you stepped back.

"Go ahead, say it so I can see the bullshit in your eyes."

"Stop it!"

"Or what!" He yelled back before realizing you wanted him to stop because you were getting aroused. He could tell by the way you were breathing, the way you couldnt look him in the eyes. Negan knew you all too well, the thought made him smirk.

"Am I making you all hot and bothered, sweetheart?"

"The hell makes you think that?" You responded defensively knowing he wasnt wrong.

"I dont know, you've got that look in your eye." Negans eyes lit up as he began to remember things that happened between the two of you.

"What look?"

"The look you'd always get everytime I teased you. You remember those days dont you?" Negan leaned in with his lips close to your ear.

"When I used to kiss every part of you and tell you how you were mine and only fucking mine." You heard him smile against you as you continued to listen to him. Truth be told, he was turning you on as much as you tried to fight it.

"You still are mine, you know that dont you?" You felt his hand slowly slide up your thigh as he began to kiss your neck making your eyes clothes. This is actually what you were trying to avoid, you knew his touch could make you weak. He knew what you liked and he took advantage of it. He slid his tongue around your neck making you moan softly against him.

"Negan....everyone's..downstairs-"

"Fuck them." He whispered roughly before he threw everything off the vanity beside you and turned you around, bending you over it. You squealed with excitement as he lowered your pants and his. He couldnt wait to feel you, he didnt even bother getting fully undressed. Not wasting anytime Negan thrusted himself into you making you scream.

"Oh yeah.." he groaned, you were already wet for him. He grabbed your waist hard as he slammed into you with full force. The vanity slamming against the wall loudly with each thrust, you melted by the feel of him.

"Look up," he ordered you aggresivly pulling you by your hair and holding your arms behind you. He made you look into the mirror in front of you. The pain was satisfying, Negans expression as he fucked you only turned you on more.

"You see that?" He panted against your ear.

"You're mine, only I can fuck you like this." Your lips parted but no sound came out as he moved faster.

"You hear me?!" He tugged at your hair hard making you scream.

"Yes!" You cried out as he bit down on his bottom lip hard before suddenly pulling out.

"Turn around-" he panted making you get on your knees as you quickly opened your mouth and he quickly came on your tongue. You took his cock in your mouth whole making him weak in the knees, sucking him dry.

"Fuck.." he whispered as you pulled away and swallowed every drop, wiping the corner of your lips. Negan was drenched in sweater under his leather jacket, you could see a sweat stain on his chest through his white shirt.

"God damn, Malia."

You smiled licking your lips as you fixed your clothes. Negan wiped his sweat off his face cleared his throat as he fixed his belt.

"Now what?" You whispered as he looked at you with a satisfying smile. Negan walked towards you and slowly caressed the side of your face as he looked at your lips.

"Now you come with me, baby and we finish where we left off." Negan leaned in and kissed you passionately, your stomach began to flutter. You hated that this man got to you like this but you couldnt help yourself. You had never stopped loving Negan and you wanted him all along.

[lumosandnoxwriting]

HI MADS!!!!!

hopefully the 3k celebration isnt over already because 😔😔😔✋

congrats on 3k you deserve it so so much🥺🥺🥺

okay okay so 👽 cym as types of flowers!!!! or candy brands!!! or colors!!! (pick your favorite or whatever you havent done lol)

👾 for the titles: "row, row, row your boat gently down the stream" and "open up a window"

anddddd that's it :3 i cant think of anything else Nskandjgjgj

OKAY IM DONE CONGRATS AGAIN MWAH MWAH :D ILYSM!!!!!!

HI JESS!!! thank you so much lovely!!!! mwah ily2!!!!!! 💖💖

my follower celebration event is now closed, I’m just finishing up the rest of the asks in my inbox!! thank you to everyone who participated!

👽 - cym as types of flowers

you as a lilac

@spacexcowgirl as a rose

@lumos-barnes as a yellow daisy

@loony-loopy-lupinn as a sunflower

@starlightweasley as lavender 

@darthwheezely as a gardenia 

@weelittleweasley as a dahlia 

@parseltongueswriting as a hyacinth 

@wand3ringr0s3 as a Minecraft tulip

👾 - made up title game!

“Row row row your boat gently down the stream”

Okay so this is absolutely a fred x reader, dad!fred fic. Where he sings the row row row your boat nursery rhyme to his daughter whenever she’s upset or crying to help comfort her and he sings it to her as she falls asleep. And it’s just kind of their thing, you know?? so there’d be a bunch of little scenes of him singing it to her at different parts of her life. but then as she grows up she starts to hate it a little bit because she’s getting older now and it makes her feel like a baby so she asks Fred to stop singing it to her. And it makes him sad but he agrees because he doesn’t want to make her upset. until the night before she leaves for Hogwarts when Fred is saying goodnight she asks him to sing it to her again and he kinda teases her about how she told him it makes her feel like a baby. And then she admits that she’s scared about going off to Hogwarts and being away from him and he gets all emo and he lays in bed next to her and holds her as he sings to her softly, and when he’s done he reminds her that she’ll always be his baby no matter what, and when she’s off at school and misses him all she has to do is sing their song and it’ll be as if he’s right there with her. 

“Open up a window.”

This one would be a post!war, Fred dies (sorry), George x reader fic. and so there’s this Danish tradition that when someone dies you open up a window as a symbol of not only letting them go but also letting new, fresh air in as a reminder that there’s always a new better day on the horizon. Anyway, after Fred dies George refuses to open any of the windows of the flat because he’s not ready to move on yet, and he thinks that by keeping the windows closed he’s keeping fred’s spirit with him. And then one day when he's out on his daily walk around Diagon Alley that Molly makes him do he runs into the reader who he hasn’t seen since school and they stand there and talk for a bit and it makes him feel a bit more normal, like before the war. and so every day when George bumps into her they stand there talking for longer and longer each day until it’s starting to get dark out and George invites her out to dinner. and being with y/n has made him so genuinely happy and has made him start to look forward to each new day and so when he finally gets back to his flat that night he opens up a window because he knows fred will always be with him no matter what and he's finally ready for a fresh new part of his life to start. 

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Baby Love - Part 9

A/N: OMG its been a while!

Hope your all doing okay 💕

This is just a chapter full of fluff im not gonna lie! 💕

Waking up the day after the premiere i dreaded looking at my phone so i just left it on the side and headed to the kitchen to make some breakfast. I wasn't ready to read all the hateful comments again, as long as i didn't look i could just pretend they didn't exist and enjoy my day with Chris. I switched on the radio and hummed along to the song on the radio as i started cooking the bacon and eggs, i actually felt pretty good.

Once breakfast was ready and i had fed Dodger i headed to the bedroom to wake Chris up, he'd had a few drinks last night and had slept like the dead!

"Hey babe.... wake up i made breakfast" i said leaning against the doorframe as i admired the naked man in front of me... he was laying face down hugging my pillow with the sheets just covering his ass. He cracked one eye and looked at me, a sleepy smile spreading across his face as he reached a hand out to me.

"Come back to bed" he mumbled.

"Nope, ive cooked breakfast its getting cold" i chuckled crossing my arms and waiting for him to get up.

"At least come and give me a kiss first"

"I forget how needy you get when your hungover..." i rolled my eyes shaking my head but took the few steps forward and took his hand. Chris pulled me closer and rolled onto his back with a wicked grin. As he pulled me onto the bed with him we both laughed before i leaned forward and gave him the kiss he wanted. I suddenly pulled back with wide eyes looking down at him, i saw the worry flashing over his face.

"What is it? Did i hurt you?" He sat up suddenly trying to work out what was wrong. I slowly shook my head before a smile spread on my face.

"The baby just kicked.... like a proper kick. Not just the little flutters i've been feeling....shit! it did it again!" I laughed grabbing Chris's hand and placing it on my stomach where id been feeling movement.

"I can't feel anything..." he said sadly shaking his head.

"Just wait.... give him a minute"

When the baby kicked again Chris's eyes went wide before he started laughing, excitement in his eyes as he brought his other hand up to cup my baby bump.

"Shit..... i felt that!"

"I told you!"

"That was something else....." he muttered staring at my bump his eyes tearing up, I leant forward pressing a kiss to his lips quickly.

"God i love you"

"I love you too. But come on, your son is hungry.... and mama needs sustenance" i laughed jumping up and rushing back out to the kitchen, i heard Chris laughing behind me and i turned round to catch him following me as he finished pulling on a pair of sweats.

"We're going back to bed after though right?" He asked catching up and wrapping his arms around me from behind.

"I think that can be arranged".

Scott had called around lunch time and Chris had obviously told him all about feeling the baby kicking..... half hour later Scott was at the door!

"Uncle Scott is here to feel the kicks!" He said sounding far too excited when he came bursting through the door.

"Sorry Uncle Scott but your nephew is not very active at the moment" i frowned rubbing a hand over my stomach.

"Thats fine i can wait..... i brought chinese" he smiled holding up the bag of take out, my eyes lit up instantly!

"Ooh did you get..."

"Yes! Of course i got you ribs! Do you take me for a fool??" He asked looking insulted that i would even consider he forgot the ribs.

"Your the best!" I beamed over at Scott suddenly overcome with hunger at the mention of ribs! "Hey babe?...."

"I'll get the pickles" Chris called back before i even asked making me laugh, i could just imagine the looks being exchanged between the brothers but i didn't care. Weird pregnancy cravings were the norm by now. A few seconds later Chris walked in with a plate of ribs, a few pickles on the side.... as soon as the smell reached me i felt the baby kick.

"Hey Scott.... your nephew is kicking!" I called out to Scott who was still plating up his food, be came running out and dramatically dived into the empty seat next to me.

"Hey! Be careful!" Chris scolded his brother shaking his head as he handed me the plate.

"Sorry but i didn't want to miss it again!"

"Give me your hand" i held my hand out for Scotts hand and placed it where i was feeling movement "okay just wait a minute......" i said casually as i tucked in to my food, a moan escaping at how good this food was!

"Jesus, you really like those ribs don't you?" Scott laughed.

"You cant even begin to imagine the satisfaction i get from this right now" i pointed to my plate "its even better than sex!"

"Hey!" Chris moaned looking at me like i spat in his food.

"Im not saying the sex is bad.... because wow i cant get enough of you..."

"Ewww" Scott grumbled making me and Chris laugh.

"Sorry Scotty! But its true!" I took a bite of my pickle and moaned again "honestly, you have no idea how good this is right now".

As if the baby was agreeing he gave a kick right where Scotts hand was resting, his eyes went wide for a few seconds then he was leaning closer talking to my bump, introducing himself as Uncle Scott promising to be the best uncle ever!

"Scott you do know the baby cant hear you" Chris rolled his eyes at his brother as he sat the other side of me.

"Of course he can! Babies can hear in the womb Chris and this baby is gonna know his Uncle Scotts voice!"

I looked at Chris smiling and shaking my head "his right, the baby can hear some stuff.... don't worry" i grabbed Chris's hand "he already knows your voice"

"You don't know that...."

"Sure i do, he moves more when you talk" i smiled "he knows his daddy's voice".

"Promise?"

"Promise".

We eventually finished eating and Scott was happy enough that he had felt the baby kicking. We were halfway through some movie the two of them chose when Scott looked up from his cell phone.

"How was your social media this morning after last night?"

"Not a clue.... i refused to look. I was in a good mood this morning , i didn't need to read all of those shitty comments....it stresses me out and thats no good for the baby....."

"You may be surprised, i've seen nothing but nice things being said. Obviously theres still the odd comment.... but most are saying how their happy for you both"

"Seriously....?" I looked over with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah"

"Wow..... i didn't expect that after the last time i was seen in public with you"

"Anything about the baby?" Chris asked his brother who shook his head.

"Funnily enough no one has mentioned it! Im surprised to be honest i thought they'd be all over that, you weren't exactly hiding that bump of yours"

"Maybe you should make an announcement before it gets out some other way...." i looked at Chris and ran a hand over my swollen belly.

"We can do that if your comfortable with it?...."

"Honestly i just want to be able to leave the house without worrying what i'm wearing, worrying that someone will see that i'm pregnant before we've had the chance to break the news ourselves....."

"Okay..... we'll sort something out".

At some point in the evening i must have fallen asleep because one minute i was watching the movie with Chris and Scott and the next i woke up in bed. The room was dim the only light coming from a lamp on Chris's side of the bed. He was laying close i could tell from his body heat, i was just about to turn to see if he was awake or not when he spoke, but he wasn't talking to me..... he was talking to the baby.

"Hey buddy..... i'm your dad....." he said quietly and i felt him gently stroke my stomach "god i suck at this...." he sighed "i just.... i guess i just wanna make sure you know me and that i love you and your mama so much. I promise i'm gonna take real good care of you both....."

"You already do take care of us" i said quietly reaching a hand up to run through his hair....he looked up at me looking a little embarrassed.

"You wasn't supposed to hear that"

"Are you really worried that the baby won't know who are?" I asked looking into those gorgeous blue eyes of his that i get lost in way too easy!

"Well i wasn't until Scott opened his big mouth but now its all i can think about"

"Chris i promise you your son knows your voice already......"

"How can you be sure?"

"He goes crazy whenever your around especially when your talking"

"He does?...."

"Yep" i smiled moving his hand over to the other side so he could feel the constant kicking currently going on.

"See!"

"Thats kinda crazy"

"I know right?..... so can you please turn off the light and come to bed im exhausted" i chuckled, Chris quickly kissed me and bent to drop a kiss on my baby bump before switching off the lamp. He got into bed pulling me against his chest, his hand spread on the bump and mumbled a goodnight.

"Goodnight.... we love you"

"I love you both too".

I fell asleep with a smile on my face thinking about how god damn sweet this man was and i couldn't help but think about what a great dad he was gonna be.

Baby Love tags: @jennmurawski13 @mybabyboytony @ms-betsy-fangirl @vampgirl1997 @ajosieface @afuckingshituniverse @chmedic @esoltis280 @southerngracela @bethabear12 @letsdisneythings @sellulii @patzammit @katiew1973 @princess-evans-addict @deidrahouseofpain @siren-queen03 @shipatheart @little-dark-empress @barnesandrogersworld @dumblani @xxloki81xx @jesseswartzwelder @lizzyclifford13-blog @booktease21

[chicagopd2020]

New Beginnings Are Good For Everyone Ch.6

Jay's P.O.V

I just dont understand why she thinks that she has to do this. We could have easily put in another officer to go undercover and we could have got the same result. I completely understand that she has a history with him & everything but she is my partner & I just do not want to see her getting hurt & with how she said that he took the break up I am so afraid that is exactly whats going to happen. I have got to at least try & change her mind.

"Kim can I talk to you for minute?"

"Sure whats going on" She asks

"I understand your reasoning in wanting to do this but isnt there another way, we can put another officer in there & get the same result"

"Your right, We could put another officer undercover but why not put someone in that has a past with him and that knows how he acts and everything. If we put someone else in that could take so much more time and right now time is something that we cant really spare."

"I just know how you said that your past was with him & I dont want you to get into something that is going to end up bad for you, something that will get you hurt or anything"

Kim can see that worry in Jay's eyes. "Jay I will be fine. Plus I know that the team is just a text away if I feel like I am in any type of danger."

Letting out a breathe that I didnt know I was holding "Yes, we are. If every night before you go to bed after you spend the day with him, if you need someone to talk to. Just call"

"Thanks Jay, I may have to take you up on that"

As everyone is getting their stuff to head home for the night, Voight stops them one last time. "Kim, just because you have only been on the team a couple days doesnt mean anything, if at any point you feel like something is a little to far or you just cant handle something, just call anyone or just text us and we will be right there."

Kim just looks down for a second and then speaks " Thanks Sargent, this one is going to be a little tought but I will be ok, I just want to get all of these men behind bars where they belong" she says right be she starts to walk down toward her car. The way that she sees this is the sooner that she starts this the quicker that it will be over.

Kim's P.O.V.

The ride home was so quiet, left alone with my thoughts and just trying to pull myself together to get my head straight with everything that I was about to have to do. As I arrived at my apartment I knew that I had to have a game plan, you knew that he wasnt the smartest person but he also knew that after what he done to you that he wasnt just gonna buy some bull crap story, so you had to be smart about this one.

Grabbing the 6 pack of beer out of the refrigerator I head for the front door and take a huge breathe knowing that it was now or never. Sending the team a quick text saying that you were going in, I set off to do something that should have been done a long time ago.

Standing here staring at the front door knowing the only thing that i have to do is knock, but all of a sudden my arms seem so heavy for some reason. With a deep breathe to get me into the right head space, I knock on put on the fakest smile that I have ever had on my face. Waiting for him to open the door, I was getting impatient and thought that maybe I would have to try again tomorrow and that was ok with me but right as I turn to walk back to my apartment the door opens. To say that he had the expression of shock on his face would be an understatment. He looked as if he didnt know what to say so I thought that I would break the silence and maybe that would make it a little bit easier.

"I know that I am the last person you expected at your door when you opened it, but I kinda figured since we are going to be neighbors that maybe we should put that past behind us and start over again. What do you say?" I say as I hold that 6 pack of beer up

He was still a little stunned but smiled and says "Sure" He moves out the way and pushes the door open a little more so that I can make my way into the apartment. His apartment wasnt much different than mine, but you could definetly tell that it was a mans apartment. As you sit on the couch and take one of the beers out for him and then another for yourself. It was quieter now than it was at the door, you knew that one of you had to speak or you were going to get no where.

So once again I was the first one the speak "So what has brought you out here to Chicago?"

He finally finds his voice "Just a job opportunity that I couldnt say no to."

"Gotcha" I say as I took another drink of beer. Cause I knew that I was going to need this with everything that I was about do and wasnt fully mentally prepared for.

The conversation finally got to flowing and both of you were asking each other questions just catching up with each other, well he was catching up and you was just trying to get some type of information that you could give Voight. Thinking that it was time to give it a shot about asking what type of work that he was in, even though all those years ago he wouldnt tell you.

"I cant actually remember, what type of work is it that you do?"

"I am in the Shipping business, Ship packages and recieve them from different countries"

"Do you ever deliever them yourself or do you just get the prepared for the shipping?" Trying to not sound like a cop but a friend that was curious

"I usually just prepare the packages,We have other people that works for the independent owner that I am working for. What brought you out here to Chicago?"

"So its not a big company, you always said that you would never work but a big company said that they were all liars. Same as you, a job that I couldnt pass up. Better pay and better,higher up postiion."

"Yeah. Would rather work for someone that I know that I can trust that focuses on the one business he has and not a million different things. What is it that you do again?"

"I am in advertising. No that much fun but I love what I do."

"You always wanted to be a cop what happened to that?"

"Yeah, I just realized that I needed to think about something realistically and find a job that I will be able to make a life for myself."

"I can understand that. I moved here for the same reason a little more money and seems like more opportunities and little more money."

Looking at the time, realizing that you can finally leave and head home.

"Im sorry to cut this short but I have to get up early in the morning and get to work"

"You know this night that this night doesnt have to end...you could always just spend the night"

"As fun as that sounds,I dont think that is a good idea at least not right now, I just have few things that I to do tonight before bed, so I will be ready for the office in the morning"

"OK...Just know that the offer stands whenever your ready to except it"

"I will definetly keep that in mind" You say goodnight as you close the door behind you.

Saying that you were glad that it was over is an understatement.You let out a sigh of relief when you are in your apartment as you rest your head against your door with your eyes closed.

"Was it really that bad"

The voice from the person on your couch scared the crap out of you....

[miniyrds]

As long as they don’t follow your blog, you could outline it anyways. Venting can be scary but it can also be healthy and provide some catharsis in the midst of all of this. You know, get the metaphorical weight of your chest

I've tried writing this a few times bc my brain is annoying and I keep forgetting things and then over explaining lol

thank u for the excuse to write out my problems on the internet

side note: I tell this humorously now and I know that I could've done things a lot differently, but it still messed me up quite a bit

this can pretty much be broken into several instance so to speak

incident one:

me and my ex-roommate and our two suitemates moved into an on campus apartment in the spring of our 2nd year. I am in my 4th year now. The semester started and we were all really excited to live together with a kitchen. ex-roommate proposed that we alternate cooking for everyone (this only lasted one month). but... ex-roommate’s bf was always over eating our food. this became more of an issue to one of my suite mates but I was fairly annoyed by him being constantly around. anyway, we decide to tell my ex-roommate that we didn’t think he should be over as often etc etc

ex-roommate left for a few hours and came back only to sit us all down and cry about how having her bf over made her feel better bc adjusting to living in an apartment was really hard and there was nowhere else for them to go (he lived in his own room in a different dorm on campus)

we dropped the situation

incident two:

in like February/early march I had gone to bed early while my ex-roommate, her bf, and our suitemates watched a movie until like 2 am. one of my suitemates shouted goodnight and woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep. ex-roommate and bf then decide to spend the night together...intimately...while I am right there.

I send her a message the following Monday bc I debated for so long whether or not to tell her that I heard. I told her that I really didn't want her bf staying the night after I had already gone to bed (basically I just wanted a heads up. I didn’t phrase this well)

I ended up getting really paranoid that she was sneaking him in and I confided in my suite mate about this (bad move)

incident three:

a week after spring break, we are getting back from a late showing of Us. It’s after midnight and we can’t find close parking. My suitemates and I offer to walk with her and she says that her bf is gonna walk her back so she’s okay

I say “oh, is [bf] coming over?” (I swear. that’s it)

wrong thing to say apparently. when we get back into the room she starts tearing into me. I don’t remember everything that was said but it started with “do you hate [bf]” and went to

we all hate your boyfriend. he makes us all feel really uncomfortable and he has for the past two years. we just never said anything

you say a lot of hurtful things. if you even think that you said something mean, apologize no matter how much later it is

you hurt [suitemates] feelings by joking about [something]. do u think she doesnt tell me? we tell each other everything

is [ex boyfriend] abusing you? because it seems like he is *never brings it up again or checks on me* (he was slightly toxic but it wasn't thanks to them that I realized it)

“im shocked im not crying rn. im just so mad” (as im sobbing)

I spent the rest of the semester on eggshells around them. I left every weekend I could but that was difficult because I didn't have a car. my ex never stepped foot in my apartment again (cant say the same about her bf)

my ex broke up with me that summer and that hit me really hard because we were co-dependent on each other in the worst way and he said a lot of mean things. ex-roommate hung out with me one time and claimed she was ‘there for me’ and got me thru my breakup. (that award goes to my mom, thanks)

I didn’t move back in with them in the fall. that honestly changed my life

incident four:

I am now in a much better place but I still feel the need to apologize to my new group of friends when I think I said something wrong. (they constantly assure me that I don’t have to) (I apologized to my current roommate for joking about how she cooks ramen and she was like "nat I do not hate u for ramen”)

I am also constantly prepared for another callout. I know I wasn't perfect and I couldve been better about boundaries. I know what to do now should that ever happen again. I feel bad about how it went down

I was not prepared for ex-roommate to turn on one of our suitemates in a me-style callout

I don’t have the full story from both sides but from what I gathered they were all joking in their normal fashion (”___ is my favorite! no ___ is my favorite!”) when ex-roommate took it to heart. this led to suitemate being excluded the moment they were walking out the door etc etc

needless to say, she moved out

ex-roommate took to social media to say “those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. friendship applications closed forever!” after she blocked my suitemate.

this is when I learned that ex-roommate sees nothing wrong with how she treated me. like 0 empathy. I have 2 sources that believe she doesnt feel any at all

a few nights ago she tweeted about my old suitemate and I sent it to her (like a good friend lol). this is when I learned that ex-roommate was always mad that I hung out with other people

conclusion?

this was kinda cathartic. It was more timeline than venting but I have no more real venting thoughts I realized. I've exhausted them. but I do take smug comfort in the random instances that bothered my ex-roommate. we didn’t work as friends or roommates and im still messed up from everything but at least I have really good new friends now :))

[heartjwi]

could you do a bed sharing au with any of the dreamies,, ur choice im indecisive, like an e2l,,, im a sucker for bed sharing stuff 🤧🤧🤧

requests are open

going on spontaneous trips with the dreamies sorta became your thing™️

like expect someone to call you at 1 am and just be like:

“PACK YOUR SHIT WE’RE PICKING YOU UP IN 5”

and then y’all end up in the middle of no where in the middle of the night

but in the end, it’s always fun being with your best friends

except for jaemin

something about him just made your skin crawl

but it dont matter

cs u lit cher rally ignore him each time

you either stick with renjun or hyuck

no in between

jaemin is just,,,, he’s something else

anywho

the dreamies ,, yet again planned something spontaneously

and that is,,,

having a roadtrip across town

you don’t even know what the fuck they ate that day

to even plan something so,, out of the blue

and out of your own reach

like, you guys barely have any money combined for gas

and at some point y’all need to shower

that means staying at a hotel

and buying food

¿¿

but according to chenle, “money doesn’t matter. the memory with your love ones does”

so here y’all are,, packed in jeno’s car

“WHY DIDNT YOU GET THE MINI VAN” hyuck dramatically whines as he got in the passenger seat

the mf passenger seat

‘lucky bitch’ you thought as u squeezed yourself between renjun and jaemin

“why is y/n beside me and not jisung” jaemin complains

“cause i don’t want to sit with you” jisung replies on the other side of the car

jaemin grunts and avoids your physical contact at all costs

but obviously fails

every time jeno hits a speedbump you just fall right onto his lap

in which of course you remove yourself off of him in the speed of light

“you fucking suck at driving” renjun kicks jeno’s chair making the car brake abruptly

“I CANT TAKE THIS SHIT ANYMORE” chenle yells getting a paper bag and v*mits

car sickness yk??

the entire roadtrip was a mess

the sun has finally set and it was getting dark out

“yo um, i’m not gonna drive our asses all the way across town overnight i need me some beauty sleep” jeno looks at everyone with the rear view mirror

“theres a motel nearby let’s just stay there for tonight and tonight only” hyuck cleared out things, getting the GPS ready & working

“what are having for dinner?” you asked

“let’s just have some pizza” renjun suggests

“heh let’s try and not kill the pizza man” chenle snickers, remembring a certain scene from a music video he saw a few days ago

jaemin doesn’t say anything and just spaces out

you rolled your eyes at how he didn’t say anything

like i said, everything he does??? annoys tf out of you

“why are you so annoyed at him?” renjun asks you, playing with the hems of the blanket you two are sharing

“cause he’s jaemin. he’s so mean to me and i didnt do shit” you murmured, loud enough for renjun to hear

jaemin, who had his airpods on wasnt actually listening to songs

he was eavesdropping your conversation w renjun the entire trip

and he somehow felt bad that he was being mean to you

just the sudden realization hits him

but he brushed it off and continued to listen to everyones conversation

night time finally comes through and everyone is now at the motel

since renjun is ,, the legal adult in this situation

he booked everyone a room

with the limited budget y’all got atm,,, he only booked 3 rooms

“sad to say, two of us have to share 1 room together since all the two bed rooms are taken” renjun explains, holding out the three room keys

“let’s play rock paper scissors to determine the pairs” chenle suggested

“great idea bro” jisung whispers to chenle

“i know right bro” chenle giggles

you stared at the two kids in awe before being rudely pushed by jaemin himself

“move” he pushes past you

“dickhead” you muttered

“rock paper scissors.. shoot!” hyuck yells out

in the end the pairs were:

first room: jeno & hyuck; 

second room: jisung, chenle & renjun

(renjun gets that other single bed while chenji gets to share the bed)

and finally, the one bed room,,,

it was you and jaemin

“you gotta be fucking kidding me” you react

the 5 boys looked at the two of you uncertainly

especially renjun and jeno

“i’d switch rooms with you if you’d like” renjun offers

“yeah! you can have the lone bed y/n!” chenle smiles

but you both reject the offers

“are you okay with this?” jeno asks jaemin cautiously knowing how,, cranky he can become when he’s a tad bit tired

“yeah” jaemin mumbles

“are you sure-” 

“its fine. i can manage” jaemin waves jeno off

everyone slowly comes up to their rooms

you and jaemin stayed behind to get your stuff from the car

you got your small luggage and backpack and started trudging up the stairs

jaemin who was behind you couldn’t help but watch you in pity

he even started contemplating with himself whether or not to help you

swallowing his pride, he silently grabs both of your bags and sped walk to your room

you felt your heart flutter at his sudden actions

“snap out of it” you slapped yourself in the face

but still

you can’t hide that sly smile from your face

jaemin places your things by the door and went out to get some fresh air and some snacks

you decided that you’d use your alone time to go shower and pamper or some shit

after taking a cold shower (since the motel offers to PAY for hot water) you brushed your teeth and changed into pajamas

a little later jaemin comes back from his stroll

and walks in on you with your pink pajamas with a towel on top of your head

“cute” he comments, smirking at himself after seeing your flustered face

he does his business and later follows you to bed

there was a pillow barricade in the middle of the king sized bed

it was kinda awkward to move around since the bed creaks

and not to mention the mattress was hard as a rock

there was no TV in your room so to pass time, you stared at the ceiling fan in silence for god knows how long

till jaemin decides to break the silence

“i’m sorry” 

you sat up and stared at him— who was also staring right back at you

“for?” you raised a brow

“for everything. for being rude to you for no reason” he calmly states

“i’m sorry too” you look at him with a pout

jaemin chuckles, “i guess we’re even” 

after that, you and jaemin talk about endless things till the two of you got sleepy

“jaems, i’m tired” you whined

“this is the nth time you whined today. don’t get me started on your whines in the car” he nags

you scoffed, “bitch please”

“and don’t think you were trying to get handsy on me whenever you fall right onto my lap!” he accuses you

“like i wanted to touch you” you poke your tongue at him

jaemin rolls his eyes but laughs anyway

“since we’re friends now, lets get rid of this pillow barricade” he flings the pillow right onto the floor

“why though” you ask dumbfounded

“no reason” he giggles

“just admit you have a crush on me” you make kissy faces in front of him

he nearly gags but laughs yet again

you stared into his eyes which were sparkling

how come you never noticed such thing before?

“anyway, let’s sleep now” jaemin tells you before turning off the lights in the room

you two made yourself comfortable under the covers before hitting the hay

“goodnight jaemin” you whispered, closing your eyes

“sweet dreams, y/n” jaemin smiles to himself, before heading off to dreamland

the next morning, instead of feeling the cold and hard mattress, 

you found yourself hugging something warm and cuddly

you woke up to be in jaemin’s arms

[potatoes-n-stuff]

I HAD SOME SAD DEMONSTUMP IDEAS BEFORE I SLEPT LAST NIGHT SO IM GOINF TO TRY TO REMEMBER THEM HERE SO I CAN WRITE THEM LATER

Uhhhh I think the first one was related to petes parents? Pete still always wanting Patrick to meet them officially on the phone but Patrick still refuses. Oh one day his mom hears Patrick singing and says its nice and Patrick gets all blushy and like hes finally at a point where he's too embarrassed to say no so he lets Pete drag him over to the phone. Mom keeps saying things and making him all blushy on the video call like asking when the wedding is HAHA and Pete isn't helping by telling her he will let her know. OK but he is honest. He does tell her they're not together. Mom says Pete cant hide anything from her and they just laugh

Then they have a conversation about.... about.... that..... Pete being like.... would you marry me. . Lmao.... as a joke....Patrick's like...hahaha...... you known you literally pay me to like you, right? And Pete bursts out laughing but also patrick immediately regrets saying that cos he can hear it. He knows Pete well enough now they he can hear that that laugh was forced. He didn't mean to let that come out sounding so hurtful.... but maybe that's good. Maybe pete needs to know that, right

Everything else is normal tho. They go to bed and Pete happily snuggles into Patrick's back and kisses his neck goodnight. Patrick wraps his tail around petes thigh and sighs

And then pete has a crisis later cos he's so stupid his best friend is a demon and the demon part isn't the problem but like his best friend is someone whom he's literally paid to take care of him what did he expect. His brain tells him he knows Patrick and Patrick wouldn't do this to him but also no he's having a crisis he's not listening he calls his friend to have a crisis with cos he's in love with a demon who couldn't care less about him the demon just wants him for food what the fuck-

Yep that's my sleep time thoughts. Also I remember last time I had another crisis post. So I need to find that uhhhh and resolve the two. So I can decide on where the story is going. So I can update the doc. Woo

[neocityarchive]

dear dream (ldh) | part 1

word count: 2.8k

warnings: language

chapter summary: Horrible as it may sound, but it seemed as if you were starting to forget what it was like to love him.

a/n: so there’s a lot of narration in the beginning but pls be patient :> ajdaskl also please let me know what you think. thank u, love u.

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You were starting to forget. It’s been eight months after Donghyuck left for training and you were starting to forget everything.

You were starting to forget how his voice sounded on the phone at night, tired and hoarse after a long day but still managing to say sweet things subtly hidden under his teases and cheeky remarks. You were starting to forget how his lips felt on yours, on your cheeks, on your temples, at the top of you head… on your neck. You were starting to forget how his slim fingers fit in the spaces between yours and how his thumb rubs against the back of your hand out of habit. Horrible as it may sound, but it seemed as if you were starting to forget what it was like to love him.

It’s ironic, though. It seemed too soon considering how you were like the first few weeks. Even when he left, he was everywhere. The two of you didn’t break up, with the promise of seeing each other again, the promise of him coming back to you. But it still felt like that… maybe worse. He was gone but you could see him in every store you used to drag him to. You could hear him in every song, even the shitty ones with repetitive riffs and lyrics. He loves random dancing to those. Almost every night, he would appear in your dreams, either as flashbacks or as random scenes.

That is until it started to fade. Your mind that was once filled with Donghyuck has slowly been filled with a lot of something elses.

Things changed faster than you expected them to. You were still on the same job at the bookstore with Taeil who has been promoted to manager. But you went to college where you met a senior who also happened to be your upstairs neighbor. His name is Doyoung. You endorsed him to a job at the bookstore and now you’re colleagues. Both he and Taeil are the closest friends you have at the moment.

Your parents were now retired after securing your future. They sold the house, moved to a smaller place in Busan, and started a barbecue business there.  You found a nice starter apartment and started drafting your book once again, but getting nowhere.

And in all those changes, the one person who you’ve always imagined would walk every step of the way with you weren't there.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he said that day. You never understood that statement. It didn’t really make sense no matter how much you thought about it, but it’s the one thing that repetitively plays on your mind. For some reason, it always gave you hope and a weird longing for tomorrow. But as days passed, you realized it really wasn’t enough.

Three months after Hyuck left and the dreams became lesser. You have already opened nine out of twelve of his letters, most of it was because you just wanted to experience his thoughts again. You miss him, but the new environment made it easier to get him off your mind every once in a while.

Six months, the dreams were rare. You missed him more than ever. There was one night when you were alone in your apartment, feeling shitty because you’re not making any progress on a report that was due the next day. You knew if he was there, he’d motivate you to work harder. You knew if he was there, it would all be different. But he wasn’t. So you opened the last letter.

“Read… when you’re mad or upset that I’m not there,” you read out loud. “As if this is going to change anything.”

It didn’t. He still wasn’t there. You drafted a reply, just wanting to let it out of your system. After reading what you wrote, you hated yourself for it. You crumpled the paper and threw it in your drawer, not having the heart to toss it into the garbage itself.

And by the eighth month… the dreams were reduced to none. You almost didn’t notice it, until one night your neighbor was watching the TV too loud. You knew it was his voice that was singing even through the thin walls. You’d recognize it anywhere. You realized you haven’t thought about your boyfriend much lately. It has gotten to the point where you begin to wonder whether it is still right to call him your boyfriend anymore.

You cried that night, feeling guilty. The aching in your chest forced you to open that letter again, the one you’ve read the most: read… when you miss me.

Your eyes scanned the words but you’ve already memorized it by heart.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” you read, muttering to yourself, and before you could stop your tongue, you said, “Bullshit.”

You scribbled on a notepad on your desk: It’s been 8 months since the last time… I’m getting tired. Are we still… us?

Seeing as you thought you’ve forgotten, you were surprised to dream about him again for the first time in a while. It was about the day he told you he was leaving. You still remember the barrage of emotions you felt right then. Those same emotions mirrored themselves in your chest that night, leading to tearstained pillow cases.

“Just… don’t forget about me while you’re there.” You choked down a sob. “Promise me.”

“I promise. I’ll be back before you know it.”

You tossed and turned in your sheets. Bzzt, bzzt, bzzt!

You groaned, your hands desperately looking for your phone somewhere on your bed to turn off the goddamn alarm.

You sighed to yourself, frowning at the sensation of the wet pillow on your cheek. “Fuck my life. It’s too early to be sad.”

You forced your eyes open to check for any notifs on your phone. It was just a bunch of emails from your professors and a few texts from your mom. But at the bottom of the list, received at 2:01 AM today… followed by 9 other tabs.

You blinked and then pinched yourself, trying to see if you were still dreaming. But you weren’t. It’s really there. With a deep breath and a fluttering heart, you tapped on the notification, watching it expand.

hyuckie: y/n!!!

hyuckie: i cant believe im saying this but..

hyuckie: i hope your habits are as bad as i remember :(

hyuckie: please be awake?

hyuckie: i really wanna talk to you, i miss you so much!!  ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

hyuckie: but i guess you’re asleep now

hyuckie: which is good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hyuckie: so i’ll talk to you in the morning?

hyuckie: goodnight :>>

You sat up, reading and re-reading the texts. It didn’t seem real. Was it...? Is this some kind of joke fate was playing on you? After almost a month of barely thinking about him, Donghyuck once again let his existence known.

You gulped, the guilt almost eating you inside as your fingers found their way to your keypad.

You: hyuck…?

You: is this real???? are you back??

You waited five minutes. There was no reply. The small hope that bubbled in your chest when you saw his texts dissipated almost immediately. Maybe you just didn’t want to be fooled that easily or maybe you were getting tired of holding onto something that hasn’t really been sitting fully within your reach for so long.

Still, throughout the day, you checked your phone more than you usually do. Even while crossing the pedestrian. Even when you were in a lecture. Even while walking in the hallway. Even when you were manning the cashier at work. You checked your phone too much that it annoyed those who were watching.

“Y/N, stop it. You’re being stupid,” Doyoung said after he returned from a round of stacking books. He has a habit of saying things straight to people’s faces. Usually, it’s a good thing, but it’s also very annoying.

You looked up, consciously putting your phone back in your pocket with a sigh.

“He’s still probably busy. I’m sure he just had, like, a night off and decided to text you.” He shrugged. “His agency don’t really give their artists breaks that much, especially since he just debuted.”

Doyoung sometimes works in the same agency as Hyuck. He’s always getting hired by people here and there to sing demos or background vocals. Even when you’ve only really heard him sing under his breath, it’s not hard for you to say he’s talented. Also, he gives you scoop on what’s happening inside Hyuck’s agency. They’ve met a lot. But as a favor, you made Doyoung promise not to tell Hyuck that you know each other.

Maybe it sounds wrong, but you weren’t really spying on your boyfriend. Besides, Doyoung is almost useless when it comes to updating you about Hyuck. All he ever tells you are his schedules, but that’s not what you wanted to know. Whenever you talk about him, it always goes something like

“How’s he doing?”

“He seemed okay.”

“Does he talk about me sometimes?”

“No, but we didn’t really talk much. He and his friends scare me.”

You ran a hand through your hair in frustration. Your mind was a mess. You don’t know what to feel about Hyuck finally reaching out to you, and for some reason, you wanted to explain what made him do it even if the explanation sounded ridiculous.

“He decided to text me at 2 in the morning, after eight months of nothing,” you said, glaring at him. “It doesn’t make sense. Somebody probably just played a prank on him.”

“By texting you?” Doyoung snorted.

You shrugged. “Why not?”

“That’s what won’t make sense,” he muttered.

“Nothing makes sense.” You sighed.

“And yet you check your phone every two minutes just in case he replied.” He shook his head. “Again, you’re being stupid.”

You were just thinking of a retort when a customer came up to the counter and asked if you had anything available on astrology. Doyoung only smiled at her politely but offered no answer.

“Yes, ma’am. You’ll find them on the last aisle.” You smiled at the lady. When she was gone, you turned back to your friend who was busy scanning some magazine he picked up. “I’m not being stupid.”

Doyoung snorted. “First of all, lame comeback. Second, yes, you are. You’re going back and forth between ‘oh I miss my boyfriend’ and ‘I don’t even know if I care anymore.’ And you’ve been going at it for months, Y/N! Make up your mind. You have to realize this whole situation is unfair to you. Third, you worry too much. Has he even seen your text yet?”

You frowned. You hate it when Doyoung is right, which is most of the time. It’s unfair that he’s always the one who makes sense. It’s worse because he tells you things you don’t want to hear but definitely should. You almost wish Taeil was here. Doyoung seems to be more reserved around him, though you’re not really sure why.

“He hasn’t,” you replied weakly. “But just to be sure…” You whipped your phone out again.

Doyoung groaned loudly, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. “And here we have an idiot,” he grumbled. “God, Y/N. Give yourself a break.”

You just rolled your eyes, continuing to navigate your phone until you’ve reached your message thread with Hyuck. Your eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

Read 8:41 PM

“He’s seen it,” you muttered, mostly to yourself. But Doyoung heard it, too. Even he couldn’t hide his surprise.

“He has?” He leaned over to look. “Why isn’t he replying then? It’s been a minute.”

“Baby steps. Doyoungie,” you said kindly.

“Oh, so now you're back to being a hopeless romantic?” He sighed. “God, you’re gonna’ give me whiplash. Whatever. Just tidy up the counter. We have to close soon.”

You nodded.

Doyoung went to walk around the store again leaving you alone by yourself. You left your phone unlocked, the screen still displaying Hyuck’s messages as you moved around and did your routine of fixing the counter and the displays in front of it.

You’ve arranged everything and checked the store’s valuables twice, yet there were still no changes on your phone except your battery has gone down 2%.

“He really left me on read,” you muttered to yourself. “Unbelievable.”

With a sigh, you locked your phone, giving up. Maybe Doyoung was right (again). Hyuck probably just finally had a night to himself and decided to talk to you, but you couldn’t reply. Fuck timing. It always ruins everything.

The lady from earlier came to you once again to purchase an astrology book. She smiled and said thanks after you handed the book back in a paper bag. You returned her smile, but inside you were questioning why people even believe in stars. You shrugged. Who am I to talk though? Why do I even believe in a relationship that doesn’t feel like one anymore? you thought to yourself.

As if the universe was determined to prove you wrong, your phone started ringing, vibrating against the wooden surface of the counter. When your eyes landed on the caller ID, you felt your heart drop to your stomach.

“hyuckie”

It took you a moment to react. Before you started dating, Donghyuck changed the setting of his ringtone on your phone to Stay With Me by Chanyeol & Punch. He did it as a joke to tease you, but after getting used to it, you didn’t bother to change it. You regret that decision now. The song played as if you were in some sort of romantic drama, awaiting for the male lead. It seems ridiculous to imagine, but it was enough to build the tension.

You answered the call before the vocals came in.

“...hello?” you said, your voice smaller than usual.

“Y/N?” Hyuck’s voice came through the speakers. You felt your heart clench just by the sound of it. “Hi.”

“Hyuck?” you asked, feeling stupid right after. There was no doubt it was him. But it felt surreal that he’s calling you right now that you just had to make sure.

“Who else, silly?” He laughed. “How’s my baby?”

Your face scrunched as you suppressed a scream. Why am I being like this? It’s just Hyuck, you thought to yourself, trying to calm down. But it’s Hyuck!!! You wanted to cry but you were still in public. A customer might come in at the last minute and see you bawling your eyes out. Even the thought of it makes you want to punch yourself.

“Wait, is it really you?!” You could barely hide the emotions in your voice. It was too much, a heavy mixture of excitement and nostalgia and happiness and for a reason… also sadness.

“Yes, idiot. Where are you?” He sounded a bit breathless. His voice mixed with the faint sound of traffic in the background. He was out, alright, but is he on a break? How long is this phone call going to last?

You looked around, suddenly confused, mind hazy. “I’m… where am I… um, I’m at work. Why? Where are you?”

“You’re still at work? But it’s 9,” he said.

“Yeah, we’re closing soon. Where are you? Are you on a break? Why are you calling now?” You wanted to ask so many questions but they’re all getting jammed in your mind at the moment. It doesn’t even matter since Hyuck isn’t answering any of them.

“Close it now,” he said.

“What?”

“Close the store now.”

“Why? My friend is still arranging the shelves.” You looked around for Doyoung.

“Tell your friend you have to go home,” he said before letting out a breath.

“What? But the keys are with me. Taeil would be mad if it gets lost,” you reasoned. “What are you even—”

“Just tell your friend something important came up.”

“There’s literally nothing going on in my life right now. What important thing would ‘come up?’” You snorted. “Just—”

You heard the bell hanging above the door ring, making you jump on your feet. “Shit. I have to go. We have a customer. I’ll call you, please pick up later. Imissyou,Iloveyou,byebye,” you said as fast as you could, crouching down lower with every word, hoping to hide from the eyes of whoever just came in.

You ended the call, putting the phone back in your pocket, before standing up straight, ready to greet the guest.

“Hi, how may I help…”

“Hi.” The guy smiled, chest heaving slightly, trying to catch his breath.

He was wearing a black jacket over a plain white shirt that was tucked in his jeans. The look was so simple, yet he still looked amazing. Better than your remember. Better than he appears on TV. Something about him was different, you could feel it. He looked different. He was taller and his cheeks were somehow smaller than you remembered. His hair was a different shade of brown than when you last saw. He was still slightly slouched but something about his stance is more powerful. He held himself with more pride now. And rightfully so. But underneath all of those, you could still feel it. That familiarity. That sense of security that no matter how many things have changed, he still is the same Lee Donghyuck. And somehow, despite your doubts and overthinking, you just knew he still is your Lee Donghyuck.

“Hyuck,” you said, voice faltering. You didn’t think it was this easy to have tears pooling in your eyes, but it was. Fuck, you thought. “Hi.”

He let out a chuckle upon seeing your reaction. “To answer your question, I’m your important thing that came up.”

[joongzone-blog]

ateez reaction to you playing a viagra prank on them (m)

anon: omg love your writing. can i please request an ateez reaction to you playing a viagra prank on them and if you could please make it a little long. i just think that’ll be hilarious.

HONGJOONG:

he’d be in the hotel room next door to yours, sharing a room with yunho when he starts to feel it getting hard

he doesn’t know why it’s getting hard, he wasn’t thinking of anything besides wanting to go to sleep but it jolts him awake

luckily yunho left the room to go join san and wooyoung

u, on the other hand, are wondering if it had set in yet so u look it up and when u realise it should kick in by now

u facetime him just to mock him

he immediately picks up

u put on a smirk and ur suddenly more annoying than usual according to hongjoong

“hi joong. how’s it going?”

he tried to hide it but u know whats going on...he just...doesn’t know it was u

“nothing much” he says “just y’know...making beats on my laptop...haha!”

“oh? that must be hard to do huh?”

“not really, it comes naturally to me now. why are u still awake?”

“it’s just...so...hard...to fall asleep and it’s so frustrating...my temper just...keeps growing...because of it...”

“stop that...why are u talking like that u weirdo” 

ur laugh suddenly can’t be contained and u just burst out in cackles, throwing the phone on the bed 

“ya! why are u laughing at me!”

once u managed to get urself together u grabbed ur phone and told him the prank u pulled on him while u and the members went out to eat earlier

his face fumes!!!

“ya! was this u?” he angrily scoffs “why would u pick me as ur victim?!”

“ur easily deceived joong. plus i saw it at the pharmacy counter yesterday and thought it’d be funny”

“im gonna beat ur ass when i see u tomorrow”

“come to my room we’ll figure out what to do with it”

“it would get flaccid seeing u, no thanks”

and u start bickering back and forth for a good three mins before joong groans into his pillow

“ya! i hate u so much!!!”

SEONGHWA

omg this baby would be so shy about it

u gave it to him it in replace of headache relief pill...but he doesn’t know that bc seonghwa doesn’t check

he’ll be on a vlive with yeosang later on when it starts getting hard

ur watching their vlive from the other room and ur just waiting...for something to happen...

when it gets hard all of a sudden his face contorts

“omo...”

and he’d look down but then immediately look up bcos he’s realising on live broadcasting

yeosang b like “what? what’s wrong?”

and seonghwa would be so speechless he’d look back and forth from yeosang to the camera 

nobody can see it bc of the filter but he is blushing like crazy

“hyung, stop fooling around, what’s wrong?”

and u watch as seonghwa whispers something into his ear, u in ur room quietly laughing to urself but also thinking of how to apologise to seonghwa bc u know he doesn’t handle pranks like these well

yeosang then does the same as seonghwa and looks back and forth from him and the camera

yeosang be like “ok everyone we have to go! it’s getting late goodnight!”

but the time is only 8pm and u just laugh as u turn ur phone off

from ur room u can hear them panicking about what to do, and seonghwa yelling and yeosang yelling back

YUNHO

big baby would also be so shy!!!

this prank would be urs and wooyoung’s idea

u would be accompanying him and the members on the set of an mv filming

u would be watching yunho and wooyoung being goofy behind the scenes in front of the cameras

and then yunho’s face suddenly changes...like in the gif...god

and wooyoung is smirking and being touchy feely with him bc he knows whats up

“yunho, is everything ok? ur not feeling sick are u?” he teases

“get y/n...i need her...like now...wooyoung please...”

wooyoung laughs at him as he goes over to u and tell u that ur boyfriend wants u

“baby what’s wrong?” u say, acting like u dont know whats wrong

he looks around, his face blushing bright red, to make sure nobody is looking at him

“i...”

“yunho...tell me what’s wrong”

“babe i-i have a...b-boner...”

u cant help but laugh and he quickly covers up ur mouth while backing u up into somewhere secluded

“shhh!!! please!!!”

“how’d u manage that huh? what were u thinking of huh?”

“literally nothing! idk why i just got it...god it hurts...what do i do?”

u put ur hand between his thighs knowing u two are alone and u squeeze one of his thighs lightly

“we could help it a bit? there’s an unused room down the hall-”

but before u can even finish it yunho grabs ur arm and dashes through the hall with u

“please, i just want it gone, i cant be having a boner on an mv, i’d get clowned by atiny”

YEOSANG

i think he’d either be the most calm about it or be the complete opposite and freak out 

but let’s stick to the most calm since that’s more his personality

u would pull the same prank on him like u did with seonghwa, making him think it was a headache relief pill

he’ll be in the middle of dancing with the members when all of a sudden...

he’d be like: and i...OOP!

he’d try to get through a few minutes dancing with it bc he thinks he’s gotten a random hard-on and thinks if he focuses on something else then it will go away

but not with viagra

when he realises its not going down he’d excuse himself to the toilets 

he’ll sit in a cubicle and wait for someone in there to leave before taking off the lower half clothes and touching himself

he wants it to go away because he has no time to be embarrassed

he just wants it to go away and he’s panicking because he’s been touching himself for god knows how long and he cant feel himself getting close

so he texts you as a last resort

yeosang: babe

you: yes?

yeosang: i really need a big favor from you

you: hm...depends what it is...

yeosang: baby can you touch yourself and let me hear you?

you: oh? you’re horny?

yeosang: i wasn’t but i just got this hard-on and i went to touch myself but nothing...

yeosang: i know it’s late but i panicked, im sorry...oh god, you really don’t need to, it’s okay don’t worry

YOU are calling...

SAN

cute baby boy would so laugh the fact that you and yunho had plotted to pull this prank off so san wouldn’t sleep tonight

he’d just laugh at himself as he watches it get harder and harder in the shower

“oh my god! what is this!”

cackles and cackles, his cute laughs everywhere

yunho is sitting in their shared room on his phone and all he can hear is san yelling and cackling at himself in the shower

he knows what’s up

“yunho! i got a boner!”

yunho laughs so hard at how easy it is for san to just tell him these things

“pretty sure a little birdie and i slipped something in your americano this morning to get back at u for the shampoo prank but that’s none of my business!”

san laughs so hard he nearly slips but thankfully he’s okay

he’s just . looking down at himself . laughing

he isn;t surprised that yunho pulled this off but you? his own girlfriend? would betray him like this?

he peeks out from the shower curtain and grabs his phone thats sitting closeby and he starts to call you

when u pick up u are welcomed to the sound of san’s high pitched screaming

“ya! i can’t believe how much of a snake you are! do you know what you did to me? cause im staring at it right now and it hurts! it’s funny but what if this never comes down in the morning! how am i supposed to sleep on my stomach when this...thing...wants to sleep with me! ya! you’re dead tomorrow!”

san doesn’t talk about anything else for the rest of the night except for ways to get rid of his hard-on while yunho is fast asleep

MINGI

omg another big baby that would both be shy and be dramatic about it

u pranked him earlier and now u and mingi are baking something together for yeosang’s birthday that’s coming soon

he’s whirring mixture when it starts to get hard and he immediately shuts the machine off

he takes a big deep breath because he’s not sure just how on earth he has managed to get a boner in the middle of baking

he tries to push it down but that!!! hurts!!!

he shrieks and u ask him whats wrong

he ushers you away, telling u nothing is wrong

but u have a faint idea that maybe it’s the little viagra pill u slipped into his drink earlier

mingi can’t take it no more bc it gets harder and harder the more he tries to ignore it

he’s quiet, silently inching behind you before you feel it pressing against your back

hm, you think

“babe. i’m not sure what’s going on but it’s stressing me out.”

“but we’re baking”

“i know but if i keep going the others are bound to see it and i, for sure, know they’re going to clown me”

“the cupcakes are gonna burn baby, you’ll just have to wait”

but he’s a big baby and he just whines over and over, whimpering as it gets even harder and warms his stomach

it makes you laugh so hard but you enjoy toying with mingi 

you love seeing him be so helpless and under your control

“baby can’t we just pause the oven and resume it when we’re done?”

WOOYOUNG

i see him having the same reaction as san but more exaggerated except because of the situation, he’s more collected about it:

u thought it was funny to drop one in his coke while u were eating out with the members

on the drive home the members are all fast asleep in the van except for you and wooyoung

you because you were reading a really cool book and wooyoung...well because he’s been trying to hide his hard-on since it started getting hard

you’ve been noticing how often he’s been changing positions with his legs and it started to irk you a little now because you just want him to tell you that he’s hard without getting shy

“babe, if you’re going to keep hiding your hard-on from me you might aswell just sit with the driver so i can’t see”

“how...how did you know?”

you laugh to yourself putting your hand between his thighs and rubbing it 

wooyoung is hot and absolutely not collected but he stays quiet because he’s with his members and they’re all asleep

you unbutton his jeans and wooyoung gets even more hotter bc ur hand presses against his throbbing hard-on

you rub it, just to see his reaction and the way he closes his eyes pleases you

but then he opens them quickly, realising where he is

you laugh at him and punch him jokingly, “relax, i’m not going to jack you off while the others are here”

and wooyoung groans but he knows ur right and besides, it’s much more fun when u two are alone

JONGHO

omg what a sweet boy!

[scorpcorpse]

5/18/20 - type time 732-822pm

so yesterday i went on tinder just like i always do when im feeling extra bored and lonely. well anyway i matched with cute looking boy so he messages me. 

PS im writing all of this here because i feel weird telling my friends what was all said. i told them a bit but not everything.

so we end up talking, and surprisingly it was a good conversation. it was very random though. im laughing and smiling at my phone. my conversations die fast or are about topics i dont really care for. im always into the conversation though no matter what especially because i like talking to people. moving on, you cant send picture on tinder so he sends me his number while reassuring me that he wont be sending dick pics (yay). he’s ranting on and on, flooding my phone with compliments. we’re talking this whole quarantine to him thanking the universe he’s glad he’s talking to a person who is pretty and cool. we talk about all the weird interactions we’ve had on this app and how everyone is soooo horny. he goes to tell me he loves my hair, he says i look like the type of girl, in a show, if i had just gone through hell, and i were to run my fingers through my hair it would just fall back into over my face so perfectly. i was like wtf. i didnt know what to say because that is very very very far from the truth. i would just look like hell. we go on to talk about our personalities and whether we are more introverted or extroverted. he’s more introvert while im more extrovert. i told him though it kind of changes depending on the situation like if i was on a date or getting serious with a person. we talk about how we hate it when people are mean to others by telling others to be quiet when theyre being too loud when it isn’t bothering anyone (does that make sense) like if youre having a good time by yourself and someone tells you to shut up or be quiet because it’s annoying them. he said he would never ever tell me to be quiet. he’s only really loud when he’s excited or passionate about something. we talk more of our dating life, he has a bigger dating pool than me though. he asks me again for the fifth time later; how am i doing, are you bangin, are you sewing sweaters? he wants to know everything. this all has me confused and intrigued. is it weird that i feel like he is very interested in actually talking to me. he asks me if i would be willingly to break quarantine to hang out. i tell him quarantine is okay eh.. im holding up okay, i do need to worry about my big head that only has two brain cells left. i also tell him im the biggest broke bitch he’ll ever meet. he says i wont ask you to pay for anything so dont worry your big head. he understands i dont want to go out. he says we can just talk and hangout over facetime. he proceeds to ask if he can ft me right now. its 2am and i look like a fucking mess. i say im a catfish he says fuck it, im half awake and im not looking for looks. next thing i know he’s calling. we talk for three hours. 

what happens in those next three hours is weird. i dont even know what happened. well immediately i ask him about his tattoos so he gives me the whole run down of his tattoos on his arms. there super cool i like them. my favorite word is yuck and apparently that’s his too because he has that tattooed on his wrist. the meaning is sad kind of he said thats how he felt about himself when he was younger so that drove him to doing that tattoo to himself. he has another arm tattoo where he throws a small detail of him having it to remind him of his friend, his old life of being on the streets and being addicted to drugs. this threw me off because he brushed over it like it was nothing. i didn’t know what else to say. i said uh okay. i wanted to scream are you okay? are you sober now? how are you? but nothing came out. he talks of his other tattoos. conversation changes to him complimenting me again. he wants to see my while face instead just my eyes and nose. i tell him about piercings. he talks about his band. he talks about the punk community. he’s rambling but it doesn’t bother me because i like how soft and soothing his voice is. he continues telling me how pretty i am, like he doesn’t stop for like two minutes. at this point i tell him im not going to respond to you anymore, im not going to take it. he tells me to take it. i take it. i dont believe him though. he can’t see my body, he can barely see my face. i have ance and my face is fat. i know i look disgusting. as he continues to say nice things about me i feel like he’s lying because no one does that. i feel like he’s saying to just make fun of me. im hating all of this. i try not to blush. im smiling. i always change the subject when he makes me feel weird and uncomfortable by saying okay or alrighty anyway. he asks me where are you from, whats make me, me? i try to think of things to say. i tell him about my being in california with no family. i tell him that the one thing that matters the most to me if my relationship with my little sister and all my friends. he agrees because same. he goes on to relate and tells me he’s all alone too. he tells me his dad is gone, his mom is too. he’s an alcoholic. he’s sober now he’s been sober for a year now. he’s okay. i tell him im sorry. im proud of you and how far you have come. im always here if you want to talk. he says no no no no dont say any of that stuff. i tell him again and that i mean it. i really do mean it too. (IF NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE AND YOURE STILLING READING THANK YOU AND ILY, IF YOU KNOW ANYONE WITH OBSESSIVE OR ADDICTIONS please be there for them, it gets super hard to be there but try and help them push through another day) we go on to more random talking. before i finally get sleepy and he says he’s gonna let me go and sleep. he asks if we can see each other. he tells me when he first saw me he wanted to fuck me but he knew that wouldn’t make him feel any better. he’d still be alone. he then decided to message me because he actually felt like putting in the effort to get to know me. not just for sake of fucking me but to know me like he seems to do a little now. he doesn’t much know about me though. he asks if we can talk tomorrow. he says i hope we can actually meet up and im totally cool with just hanging out with you and just vibing. we dont have to do anything. i just want to chill with you. i tell him thanks for telling me all of this. i appreciate it because many guys dont say any of this. i say yes we can talk tomorrow, i’ll text you. we can be friends and once this all settles down maybe we can meet in person. he then tells me, im only going to say this once and im never going to remind you again. im cool with friends with you but that’s not my intention. i want to be more than friends, i want to your person, your boyfriend. but until youre ready after a while of us talking and when it crosses your mind where you like me and think of me differently then we can move on to being more. i was just sitting starring at my phone in shock. i didnt know what to do or say. i was confused. in my mind i wss like okay yes we have a 2 hour text convo and a 3 hour phone call but what. you cant say of this after that can you. i agreed because it was the only that could come out of my mouth at the time. he says okay, my name, i’ll you go and sleep. goodnight. i tell him goodnight. we hang up the phone. now i turn my body around to my back on the bed starring at the ceiling saying what the hell just happened. i fall asleep. 

IM sORRY for my ramble. i was in shock and im confused and scared like what if turns out to be bad for me. but all the compliments, the soothing voice, the small hints well actually big hints of his battle with addiction. ps he also tells me about his anger issues and therapy. i feel weird. i slowly started to be seduced by him, like he started to seduce me. iykyk lmao. 

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

Ok all is well gooenight. No walk tmrw. Mahbe a shower. Made jyself food. Wont be able to have snacks but. I will have 3 meals. Hopefully my parents go out soemtime tmrw so i can say hi to Jack. Did say hi while making tmrws food but hes in his silly mood so he doesnt wanna sleep in my bed tonight. Shcih is ok i think hes tired of probably bwing crushed to death while im asleep. He did get pissed when i took bacon out the fridge tho and didnt givehim any. And then he wanted to playfight with me but i had too many things in my hand so coulsnt :( its ok tho we both sleepy now hight night. Sleep tight. Dont let the bed bugs bite. Bc if they do. Ull get a rlly itchy bite somewhere on ur body. And itll suck bc itll moet likely b a spider bite. But not even a cool onenlike spider man. A boring one that ifches and stings. And ur like. Come kn spiderssss i dont even move u from my room unlessyourereallubig and thisis how u repay meeeee come onnnnn. And then if its on ur lehs ur fucked forevwr. Anywyas. Goodnight. All is well. Last night i dreamt of going to mexico but all the food there being south east asian for some reason. And it was all sims2 quality so i couldnt even see what anything was but i knew it was south east asian bc everyone was saying it was. But we were also in mexico but they refused 2 serve mexican food. And when i tried some it all tasted the same. It was like. Vegetables. All the kinds i dint like. But everythign tasted like that. And i was like :( im a picky eater i cant have anything here. And the person next to me who coulsve been anyone i dont remembee the ppl in my dreams unless theyre significant oike that one time charlie sliemcicle was tnere and he shouted donde esta el slimecicle. Which seemed redundant as he was right there saying that. But that was significant. Anhwways there was a person next to me who jightve been a middle aged woman i think. And she said that i nad to pickSOMETHING unless itd be rude. Oh hea we were like jn a sorta market thing but. It was rlly cramped like. Single file everywhere. And we were in these sorta carriages??? Or boats. Idk. It was basicallt a mix of like so many things but i knew we were in mexico for the same reason i knew tne food was south east asian bc i just Did it was just a Fact. Anyway s. The woman next to me told me i was rlly selfish for not picking any food to eat. Anddd i dont remember much else. Tonight i will dream of. A pool. Might be another drowning dream. I drown a lot in dreams. Goodnight

[hegglespeggles]

How to write an essay you could not care less about in 10 steps

Hello. I have an essay to write.

I am also, (unfortunately) the kind of lazy, apathetic burnout who will only do my FUCKING work if I get really worked up. Usually that ends up meaning all of my papers are spite-fuelled tirades but my profs seem to like them so fine. I hope you find this particular raging tirade useful.

Today, I would like to educate the 4 of you that will actually see this on a fine art I have perfected over the years. Writing a paper, about which, you do not give a single, solitary, crumb of a fuck about. This is (you may have guessed) and excellent way for me to procrastinate doing a paper that *I* do not give a single solitary crumb of a fuck about. For best results, I recommend doing this NIGHT-BEFORE-PANIC like, a week in advance so you can fix all the NONSENSE that your more reasonable brain will undoubtedly find. But if it’s the night before and you are shit outta luck, this will get ‘er done. And with practice, you can even pull good grades outta these bitches.

 Dissociating? I gotchu. Woke up the day of the deadline to feel like absolute utter garbage? Search no more friends.  

  FAILING GRADES ARE BETTER THAN ZEROS JUST FUCKIN DOOOOOO ITTTT

1.    Go get the prompt.

I fucking mean it. Even if you are like 1000% sure you know what the prompt is asking, go to the FUCKING assignment, and copy that shit into your word document. Got the assignment on paper? TYPE THAT SHIT UP MOTHERFUCKER.

(Do you see what I fucking have to deal with)

Boom?

BOOM.

Congratulations, you now have a document, and whats more, there are WORDS in it!! You aren’t starting from scratch anymore kiddo. Fringe benefit, you always know EXACTLY what the assignment wants because its fucking Staring You Down. Not saying you have to do exactly as it says, mama didn’t raise no BITCH and I aint scared of fuckin CALLING PROFS OUT but if you wanna break the rules you gotta know what they are first

(Disclaimer: I have also been kicked out of class on numerous occasions for fighting with the prof and had full classes where the lecture WAS me arguing so maybe take my opinions of conformity with a grain of salt.)

2.    Math THE FIRST

I know, this is an essay and not a fucking calculus test. But some of this shit is USEFUL OKAY

Take the paper in question. How long does it have to be? Mine is 5 pages. A page is generally accepted to be 250 words (double spaced because we FUCKING LOVE OURSELVES) so 5 x 250 = 1250 wds. That’s the goal. That’s the pinnacle. That’s your new holy grail.

Time to split this bitch up

  3.    Yarrrrrr, CONTENT

And finally, we get to the part that is the reason why you are being an absolute bitch baby about this essay (maybe. I might be projecting. Your life is your life and im sure youre doing your best.) I Hate this part, but now with our magic number we don’t need to pull 5 pages out of the ether.

This part really requires you to know your vibe. Is this something that you have a lot of little opinions (read: evidence) about or like, only 2 or 3 big bois? Look deep into your soul and figure out which is the easiest for you to shit out, a rant or a list. a  great way to do this is to WRITE ANYTHING YOU GOT OUT

Here you can see I’ve put all of the thoughts I have about the question into a list, slapped some standard “opening” and “closing” shit around it so I can FUCKING FIND IT AGAIN and given it a good hard look. Whats the common thread in all of my opinions? That the prompt is fucking stupid and makes no sense is asking 2 different questions. Congratulations: you found your thesis. This essay, like many of my essays, bears the thesis “this is a weird question to be asking” (which falls under my broader category of “bitches aint shit” essays.)

Congratulations you have the bare bones of your skeleton.

  4.    MATH THE SECOND

 The magic number returns. All hail our glorious leader. 1250 right?

So heres how I break this down. Break off a small chunk at the beginning. For this essay im gonna split off the 250. Split that baby in half. Congratulations, now you have a word count on your opening and closing. Personally, I know I like a lil extra space at the end to get all ranty, so Imma split this puppy up 100 for my opening and 150 for the closing. WARNING: You will think that you will be able to write enough in your opening and closing to take up lots of space. You will feel the urge to give them both the same amount of words that you give your points. This is misguided and foolish. Not only will you 1) not be able to do it but 2) even if you did, that’s like getting a sandwich which is all bread. No one wants that. Don’t be that dude. Fight the urge.

 RIGHT SO. We’re still left on the other 1000 words.

If you have an idea that like, is bigger than the others, go ahead and give that puppy more of the word count than the others, fractions are your friend here and you wanna think about how much of your final product each of these babies will be. If you, like me, are an utter buffoon with no clue what youre doing, open your calculator up. Divide the remaining word count by the number of points you have. Congratulations. Youre doing the essaying.

If this is enough to get you started, GREAT! See you at step seven. BEFORE YOU GO I would like to give you this tip

5.    CITE YOUR INFORMATION AS YOU ADD IT IN.

It doesn’t need to be a full citation, just literally a footnote with something that will help you remember where its from and for the love of god WHAT PAGE IT IS ON. The you of 3 hours from now will thank you.

  6.    Filling in the skeleton

 I don’t know about you, but I cant exactly riff off of a single sentence. Like, I know what the VIBE of my point is, but like, I cant pull it out of a hat. The name of the game here is whittling down your arguments into thinner and thinner chunks that are easier and easier to bullshit. This is how you avoid that “burning building found in flames during Brooklyn fire” bullshit that memes. You don’t wanna meme. You wanna pass. So, figure out what the things you are gonna say and in each bit, keep track of how many words you are gonna write. EITHER

a)      You put how many words you think you can write on any point beside the point as you go and just keep developing points and shuffling word counts around until it matches the total for that section

or

b)     You evenly breakup the word count between all the points and keep breaking them down until you look at a subject and a word count and go “yeah that’s doable. I can do that.”

I prefer the second so LEGGO.

Ta-Da!

7.    Write ‘er up

Ahhh glad to see we’re all back together again. Try-hards who can ACTUALLY bullshit papers, glad to see you’ve rejoined us! This is the part where you take all that shit you’ve broken up into nice little chunks and you turn it into something worth reading. You can do it. I believe in you. Try and keep your citations in place.

I like to do this as a question answer thingy, like an exam, so halfway through writing mine is gonna look like this

 The handy part about the numbers is that it gives you a frame of reference for how your bullshit is going. Realized you had a lot more to say here than you thought? Dope! Less bullshit somewhere else, take it out of a weaker point. This point didn’t give as much as you thought it would? Split the difference elsewhere! This way you have checkpoints and you can see how your essay is going

And then you can go ahead and delete your skeleton work. Its time. Its served you well. For extra drama, whisper menacing nothings to it as you send it into the darkness. Personal favourites include “no one will mourn you,” “your fate belongs to me,” and “so this is what you have come to”

  8.    Citations

Theres like a million ways out there to find out how to do your citations and its gonna depend on what kind of a paper you are writing. I use Chicago most of the time, including here. My advice? Use a site like, bib.me or something to do your bibliography, and then plaster that in the bottom of your document. Use that as the building blocks to do your footnotes. Let Purdue Owl be your guide. Purdue Owl Style Guide Is A Mighty Friend Indeed.

 Also your welcome for that, “putting the page numbers in as you put the info in” shit. That took me alarmingly long to figure out. It’s a wonder theyre giving me a degree.

  9.    Proofread that shit, ya bougie bitch.

If you wanna be time effective, getting a friend to proofread while you do your citations is a great way to go. If you have a few days, put your paper away and come back to it. If you are out of friends and time then https://www.paperrater.com/ is your last hope.

  10.       Slap a title page on that shit and GET IT SUBMITTED

 No joke, I have been using the same template for a coverpage all through highschool and my undergrad. There is only one title page and every time I write an essay I take the title page from the last paper I wrote. There is no beginning. Only title page. Title? Topic of paper: point of paper. For example, If I had to title this screed I’d call it Essay Writing: An exploration of mediocrity. slap the date and your name and the course and instructor on there and BAM. YA DONE.

 Anyway submit that shit an go to bed youre done goodnight

EPILOGUE

I’ve gotten this essay back, and when I wrote it, I was barely a human being. Barely capable of human speech let alone a coherent argument. I would forget the end of the sentence by the time I typed out the beginning. But I still for a 70%! is it the best mark I’ve ever gotten? no! but it is a hell of a lot better than the 0% I would have gotten if i hadnt done this. I get it. And i hope this helps. 

[flamebrain]

mattfoggy hcs, straight from the bastard empire sorry these all read like shitepostes(L O N G post under cut you’ve been warned)

WTNV au:

nightvale is just populated by like. vigilantes and other poewered people and foggy shoes up one day like. hey anyone need a lawyer? and the whole town falls in love w him

MURDERDOCK IS KEVIN

matt does radio and talks about foggys perfect hair and perfect teeth and foggy calls in like "heh, thanks dude, but aren't you like blind?" and matt shuts the call off immediatley

everybody knows matt is daredevil because he makes wink wink nudge nudge comments about it like 'ah. it appears that an entity has appeared near the dog park. castle appears to be on the scene now, and...ok, he's got a gun. i cant do anything about that, but my pal (noises of him scrambling and obviously knocking things over) daredevil might be able OKHERESTHEWEATHER" and it cuts off and like. he shows up 5 seconds later to kick frank in the face for using lethal measures AGAIN

EVERY TIME IT CUTS TO THE WEATHER AND THEN CUS BACK AND THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN SOLVED ITS JUST MATT. like. breathing just a little heavier than normal into the mic like. 'so it appears uh. the issue has been resolved thanks again to daredevil and his pal moon knight. such a shame i had to cower under my desk while the weather was on. ok goodnight'

the funky thing abt nightvale in this au is that it's basically just like. new york from 616 but foggy's like. from our earth so he's like HWAT THE FUCK AND AHIT IS GOING ON IN HERE ON THIS DAY AND WHY CANT I LEAVE he gets kidnapped by super villains on like his second day in town and immediatley regrets every life choice he's ever made

matt works at nightvale radio by day and conviently cuts to the weather every time something comes up so sometimes there's like. 7 half hour weather broadcasts a day and the townspeople just. humor him

foggy falls in love with matt after figuring out after .5 seconds that he's daredevil and he saved him from a bunch of baddies on like his second day and matt compliments him on the radio like every day and yeah they're fuckin good ok assorted stupid college hcs: matt and foggy like to chill in each other's beds. foggy doesn't notice that often because matt moves back b4 he gets back and matt pretends not to notice but  like. he can smell foggy was there. foggy. stop napping in this bed you're making my sheets smell like you, foggy, i KNOW they're silk and i know you think you're getting away with it but you're NOT,

matt, coming back into the dorm after being out for the day: foggy are you laying on my bed foggy, sitting up straight: nah pal. just sitting on the end for a minute hehe. just had to rest the old joints matt, knowing DAMN well that he was lying down a second ago and he's obviously lying but not being able to say anything; haha ok. move

hrnnn matt knows foggy is gay long before he tells him because he catches him in a lie about who he was out with but he can't say anything and like. he knows foggy is scared to tell him but he doesn't know how to bring it up and he's like. i want him to know he can trust me but i don't know how to tell him i know please foggy

foggys heart goes a mile a minute anytime the subject of being gay comes up around matt and matt wants to yell at him that it's OK and he doesn't care but his hints that he's fine with it seem to fly right over foggys head and so one day he gets so fed up with trying to convince foggy he's chill with gay people he just kisses him. wig

hrnnn. matt doesn't like the snow because it messes with his senses and he can't see but he can't say that to foggy so he just says he doesn't like the cold and foggys like "yeah doofus you weigh like three pounds you're skin and bone compared to me smh" and insists on cuddling him every time he sees matt get like That bc he thinks he's just chilly and it's. oddly comforting to matt because yeah. nobody really Holds him like that, and he Is Cold, and foggy is Warm,

matt gets Very touchey around people he's close with and so when he gets close with foggy he puts his arm around him a lot, rests his head on his shoulder, holds his arm even when they're not going anywhere, etc. foggys heart speeds up every time but matt just assumes that's what people hearts do when that happens because he doesn't really do that with anyone else and hey, he's happy when he does it and his heart maybe spikes a little too, but then he gets someone else's arm to lead him when foggys sick one week and their heart stays the exact same, what's up with that? so then he starts paying attention to all the people on campus, and the touching doesn't usually make the hearts go wild, but, well. matt 'sees' it happens and he's like HaHa, See, This is A Thing, and then he realizes that the people that have it happen to them? they're couples. and he just. freezes because first of all, Foggy- and at him- an- and second, his heart ALSO does a thing, so-

heres a rEALLY stupid unrelated au/hc i got after hearing a friends disater story hfdjhskja matt goes on a blind (hehe) date with a girl and it's pretty much a disaster, it turns out she brought her friend who is also meeting a guy at the same place, and like. she's obviously incredibly wack she says blind people are god's mistake and stupid shit like that so matt gets up halfway through their meal to go sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes while he thinks of an excuse to leave? and eventually a guy comes in and he's like 'uh hey, dude, you in here? your date grabbed her friend and left so we're both dateless now, thats a relief for me and unless you're just having incredibly bad bowel movements i think it's pobably one for you since you Have been in here for like half an hour uh im foggy by the way' and then they go back out and sit together and talk about how wack that fuckin was and like. inadvertent date

hey i can talk a lot of shit about how matt falls asleep on foggy but. sometimes foggy falls asleep on or next to or with matt and matt goes !!!! and he does not move and then he eventually falls asleep with foggy head on his shoulder and his head on foggys and when FOGGY wakes up and realizes matts still there and is ALSO asleep he doesn't move and eventually falls back asleep and then it's just like. waiting until the time aligns that they're both awake at the same time because neither wants to move and wake the other send tweet

SOULMATE AU:

foggy looks up from his college bed, sees matt, and suddenly EVERYTHING is fucking rainbow and he's like 'oh fuck. oh shit. wait. this is a dude' and matt's like 'is everything ok my guy?' because foggy's like. >:O and of course he has no idea because he's blind but foggy doesnt realise this and for a hot minute he;s like "OH FUCK. ITS ONE OF THOSE RARE OCASIONS WHERE HES PERFECT FOR ME BUT I'M NOT FOR HIM," and is about to s o b before he's like wait a fucking minute

yknow the au where like. the first words you hear from your soulmate are marked on your skin at birth? foggy's are 'excuse me', absolutley common, a chance meeting, and he stops jumping every single time he hears them after age 8 when he realises just how many times that phrase is said. matt's are 'yeah, who're you looking for,'  but he doesnt remember that, there's no constant reminder of it since he's blind, the nuns wouldn't tell him, the kids made up childish shit like 'poopoo', and stick DEFINITLEY wouldnt fucking tell him because hes stick and hes an asshead and eventually matt stops asking and caring. it takes WEEKS for after they meet for foggy to ask matt about his words and matt just says 'oh yeah, i dont remember. here" and shows foggy and when he sees them he's like. 'hm. sounds familiar' and forgets about it untill like two years later theyre drunk and talking about the first time they met and matt's like 'yeah you asked like 'who'm i looking for and then panicked because i was blind' and foggy's brain just like. short circuits for a whole ass minute and then when it clicks he just goes. "yOU"

TRANS MATT:

matt realises when he's still in the orphanage that mayhaps he hates being not a dude and haha! hes not gonna fucking come out to catholics he knows about That. he tries to tell stick, around the time their closest, and FUCK STICK he refuses to call him anything else or support him becaise stick is a peace of fuck shit FUCK STICK so that scars matt from coming out for a DAMN while so like. when he goes to college he introduces himself to everyone as matt and emails his proffesors like. 'hello please my name is redacted on your forms please call me matt its uh. a nickname' and he's not like. out to anyone but matt is close enought to his deadname that most people don't question it. foggy does, though, a little while after they meet, and matt is so fed up with not telling people and being called the wrong pronouns he just goes 'i want to be a guy ok' and goes absolutley APESHIT when foggy's like 'oh, cool. do you want me to use he pronouns for you' because wait. people are...ok sometimes? and matt's like. about to cry 

 alternatley: matt says "I don't wanna be a girl." and foggy goes "oh hey are you trans? same hat!" and then foggy tells matt like. binding tips and shit and theyre Good ok

deadpool kills transphobes, sm n dd just fucking beat the SHIT out of them in a back alley and like. they let DP know where they are but whatever happens happens :D

elektra, impaling two transphobes onto the side of a building with her knives: matthew, i know you can hear me, why

one day elektra sees matt has dumped a guy on her roof and just. sighs and goes back inside and matt waits for like 15 minutes before halfheartedly picking up the dude and dropping him off at franks.

matt dropped them off at nats One Time and she went apeshit and hunted down like 20 more of them.

foggy, holding a bat: cmon matt let me kill ONE matt: 'fine but if you get caught im not going to be your lawyer.'

INTO THE DEVILVERSE AU:

earth 14512/TRN700 (peni parker’s universe) matt murdock has a robot seeing eye dog who's also a vigilante

hddjdsjdhdn they all show up to earth 6's foggy and he just. sighs and all the devils start crying because He Is Here

hmm ok. canonically we know nothing about miles's matt but we know he exists and is known figure because miles knows of him but doesn't know he's daredevil i'm Prefty Sure so like. i'm gonna say he's just a successful lawyer who has radarsense but never got yoinked away from the orphanage by stick and never got training so like. hemndhdjsjnow the QUESTION is who finds that matt because there's a Very Different outcome depending on if like. murderdock meets him first or the matt from hobopeters universe does

hmm. murderdock comes in first like gwen does but doesn't out himself as competent w like swords and shit. but he OH HES THE OPPOSING FORCE FOR UH A COURT CASE MATT IS IN AND MATT HAS NO IFEA HOW SIMILAR THEY LOOK BECAUSE HES BLIND HRNNNNNHSHDHDHDJ and then matt from HP's universe comes in like HEY YOURE ME RIGHT. what the FUCK i need the laws in this dimension STAT and murderdock ':"sees" him and is like ah fuck. my goose may be uhhh cooked

ok mileses matt is like 'so what brought y'all here??? hhh????  and murderdock sighs and goes well my boss who's not really my boss from MY universe is doing something stupid here and opened a dimensional portal and it could maybe tear the multiverse apart which i guess i'm not stoked about' and matt's like 'who's your boss?' and murderdock begrudgingly says 'wilson fisk' and matt immediatley goes >:O because he's CONSTANTLY defending people who were injured as a result of what fisk and his company do

anyways. matt immediatley rushes to foggys because "foggys my partner, he's helped me deal with fisk, he knows him, he can help," and he swings open the door and like. one of two things happens actually either A: foggy is like matt. MAATT. AHAT IS GOING ON WH. WHY IS THERE A TALKING DEER WEARNING SPANDEX WHO CLIMBED THROIGH MY WINDOW MATT PLEASE HE SAYS HES Y O U or like. matt walks in and deerdevil is playing pattycake with robodog and daredevil noir is incessantly flirting with foggy and when matt comes in foggys like 'hey. i don't know what's going on but i think i'm trading my best friend'

murderdock is like...the cool college student who tells freshies about weed murderdock: so, you don't know how to fight right  matt: no??? i'm blind??? md: but you can kinda see right. matt: yeah like a radar kinda md: normal blind people can't do that you know matt: they wHAT md: you can listen to heartbeats if you try hard enough. you can tell when people are lying matt: i can W H A T md: yeah. what me to teach you how to kill a man matt: W H AT NO IM A L A W Y E R WH

hrnnn the matts in this universe push our matt away to stay with foggy because he doesn't deserve 2 die and you KNOW every matt pushes people away but foggy is like. matt i know you tried it's ok i lov you buddy and he's like HRGGHHHH FUNCK YOU and makes foggy tell him stories untill he can distinguish lies and hide in a place around their office untill matt can like. find him instantly and training montage shit you feel me and he rolls up to the collider in his black pjs like "hello my fellow devil men. i hear you all have no plan. well. i don't either but i'm here" and one matt is like. how did you go-OH YOU DID IT and all the mats high five and cry a littlethey're still reluctant to let matt come help but they're all like. "we're all depressed and suicidal anyways we all have big guilt and if we didn't let him i lnOW he's gonna have big guilt forever he can stay"

THE PENUMBRA PODCAST AU:

foggy is a private eye, kinda depressed a lil bit, and he works w his secretary karen who helps him with tech and stuff because he is god awful at all that 

"mike whatevermaggiesmaidennameis" is an occult specialist from dark matters agency assigned by an agent natasha of dark matters to help him with his current case. 

foggy does NOT want to do this with any damn occultist or whatever the hell but before he can escape mike shows up and god DAMN is he charming and catches him before he can climb out the window, so. that's that for introductions. anyways, hijinks, elektra is cassandra, if you care listen to the murderous mask, anyhoo foggy stars to notice something is kinda weird about matt but brushes it off. they finish investigating and retrieve an important artifact.

it's cold, mike says. sorry dude, all the places near here are closed, foggy says. is your place? mike asks. oh, says foggy they go back to foggys place and maybe make out a little bit, but foggy realizes oh shit, mike just tried to steal the keys to my safe where i stored the artifact, shit, and plaxces him under arrest before he can do anything, and calls the cop cops.

they come to take mike away, and minutes later foggy finds a note, scrawled INCREDIVLY messily, in his pocket. "sorry," it says, "i wasn't tricking you about anything i said, and i meant everything i did. -matt murdock ps. check around, say, X avenue. you may have to do a bit of cleanup." when foggy checks cameras that overview there, he find the officers that took murdock from his apartment hogtied together, and sees their clothes strewn on the ground - forming letters - with love. their car is gone. PODCAST AU:

matt listens to podcasts a lot right and so foggy is like hmm mayhaps this is a good idea. but the type of podcasts they listen to differs so incredibly like matt listens to serial and the wildest one he listens to is probably judge john hodgman whereas foggy listens to shitpost podcasts like mbmbam and can i pet your dog foggy keeps referencing mbmbam around matt because he just assumes that he listens to it and matt is so confused every time and one day foggy says "damn matt you're really horny for this one huh" and matt just snaps and says FOGGY WHAT DO YOU M E AN

so then they are like oh shit you're not listening to the good ones. no YOURE not listening to the good ones. solution?  listen together which means sharing earbuds which means sitting next to eachother on small college bed which means????? cuddling

also eventually they decide fuck it. let's make our own podcast and they combine the mbmbam and jjh format so they get questions and do goofs and stuff and then give actual legal advice but sometimes foggy will be like "ok. here's what you do. you need a cat? go into the pet shelter and take one. what are the gonna do beat you up with their cat toys? didn't think so." and matt starts crying because "Fo g g y WE ARE LAWYERS I KNOW YOURE GOOFING BUT THATS ILLEGAL FOGGY YOI CANT TELL OUR LISTENERS TO GO DO CRIME"

COFFE SHOP AU:

matt has a caffeine addiction and constantly comes to foggys coffee shop and orders one black coffee every morning and foggy eventually is like. hey buddy. do you EVER drink ANYTHING F U N EVER

matts like...no...i need coffee as strong and dark as my soul... and foggys like ok edglelord. wait up i'm about to change your life

foggy makes him a latte that's just a little bit caramelly but not too sweet and he's like here. drink this. no charge you deserve to live a little. also here's your boring edgy coffee you still have to pay me for that one. matt tries it and he's like hmm. not bad, but just not. Good and foggy is like wow fuck you. i'm going to find a good drink for you that isn't this hell water so every morning matt comes in and foggy gives him a black coffee and a free Fun and Cool coffee on the house

matt always is polite even when foggy can tell he DESPISES what foggy made but he's not going to stop untill he finds something god damn it matt

ok anyways they start meeting up more. matt starts taking his breaks in the coffee shop and and foggy hmmm...always seems to have a shift off when matt comes down..hmm. coincidence....hmmm....theo suffers for him by covering all his shifts when matt comes in and he's like well, actually fuck work

eventually foggy is like hey dude. do you wanna test my drinks before they go on the menu or help me perfect my recipes and shit you have a good toungie right (matt goes apeshit, because fuckin FOGGY YOU CABT SAY THAT) but he's like haha yeah. that'd be fun. haha

and then foggy finds out matt is INCREDIBLE at baking when he hands him a cookie and matt goes. hmm. too much flour add a fourth a cup less and a pinch more of saltand he's like??? bitch. i'd like to see you do better. and then matt does

so basically every day foggy closes up a little earlier and lets matt in and they dick around in the kitchen and bake and make coffee and foggys shop gets more and more popular because hey this already really good joint just started selling the most BALLER carrot cAke waht the fucké

anyways fall comes around and foggy is like GUES WHATT ITS TIME FOR WHITE GIRL DRINKS TRY THIS and he gives matt a pumpkin spice latte and matt is like. •.• THIS IS IT. THATS THE ONE

and foggy starts crying MATT PLEASE YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. PKEASE MATT, MATT I CANT ADD PSL YEARROUND BECAUSS YOURE A BASIC WHITE BITCH MATT

he bullies foggy into keeping the latte on the menu by threatening to stop helping him bake and foggy is SO OFFENDED, on behalf of good taste everywhere, matt, please,

anyways foggy continues rags on matt for only liking the shittiest fucking drink god damn it matthew fucking hell i make you 3 billion and THIS is the one you pick you disaster and matt is like haha shut up. stoopid

foggy doesn't, and you can guess where this be headed because i'm gay and soft,

matt kisses him and foggys like. ?????????? and matt goes AH FUCK. I COULDNT THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO GET YOU TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH SORRY. GUESS ILL GO and foggy throws cookie dough at him and drags him back over because he's not leaving fuck that. fuck you. and then they're happy and domestic the end

wait i lied matt opens a pro-bono firm in the back of foggy's shop and he gives all his clients freshly baked dessert and coffee and he's so good at being a lawyer and foggy becomes so good @ running his shop that customers keep coming and they're the Cute Gay Couple everyone knows abt and loves

ACCIDENTAL (?) KISSING:

SO. there are so many god damn moments foggy nearly fucking breaks and smooches matt out of sheer unbridled uwu soft feelings. SO MANY. when they win their first mock trial together and matt looks so FUCKING happy and he tells foggy how good they work as a team and foggy is about to lose his mind but he just goes. 'haha yeah' and gives matt a fist bump they finish taking the bar: matt's had to take it in a seperate room, stupid blind accommodations. he finishes first because OF COURSE HE DOES HE'S MATT MURDOCK and the second foggy finishes and leaves the room he sees matt there and he's filled with so many emotions he's about to go apeshit but he manages to contain them JUST enough not to make out with matt on the spot but gives him the tightest fucking hug and matt's like "ok buddy! love you too! please dont break my ribs!" and foggys too happy to notice matt forgot to flinch like he didnt know foggy was coming

Foggy gets the sign to matt and he can tell how fuckin stoked matt is and all he can think about is how grateful he is that the two of them get to work together and fucking do GOOD together and he's trying to express that in his awkward foggy way and he's GOING to kiss him right then and there!! hes about to do it look out world!!! and then matt says "you're NOT going to kiss me" and foggy realises haha YEAH THATD BE A BAD IDEA HUH and jokes it off and gives matt another hug - "i'll be careful not to break the ribs this time, buddy, seems like you've been falling over and hurting yourself enough recently,"-

foggy almost kisses matt out of anger when he finds out he's daredevil, when he won't shut up about how this city needs him and foggy would have done the same and blah, blah, bullshit because maybe then he'd FUCKING listen to him, or at least it'd shut him up, but the honest betrayal he feels - at matt for not telling him and at himself for STILL having a part of him that wants to kiss matt - is enough to get him just to leave : ^)

alright. the gang is watching fisk get carted away and see that SHIT, he's broken out, of course it wasnt going to be this easy. matt puts karen in a taxi goes to run off and foggy grabs him by his coat because MATT. you're not going to go fight fisk in your god damn pajamas right now it's too dangerous you're going to die you stupid son of a bitch idiot

and of course matt doesn't listen, he tells foggy to get back into the car with karen, go to his place, they'll be safe there, and grabs his own taxi

and foggy's left to sit there with karen in the cab as it drives Oh Too Fucking Slowly to matt's, and he's mumbling curses all the way and karen is trying to calm him down, he doesnt know why he's so worried, and all foggy can think about is what if matt dies because i didnt stop him and what if karen never gets to hear it from him and about 10 billion what-ifs that wont leave him the FUCK alone, and he sits next to the windowsill he knows matt comes in through and waits, not even wanting to look at the tv because what if he sees worse news Hrgh

matt beats up fisk and he barely even waits for the cops to get there, he gets one look and confirms 'yup, that's mahoney,' and fucking BOOKS it to his apartment, he climbs through the window and foggy's just sitting there waiting, karens in the next room watching the broadcast at a 3 minute delay on her phone, matt doesnt have a tv hes BLIND >:,\

and when matt comes in, bloody and beaten up and doing That Panting Thing He Does, but definitley alive, foggy just fucking. grabs him by the shoulders and kisses him because HE IS A L I V E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and matt is suprised but he doesnt even try to protest because he's still riding the adrenaline from the fight

anyways. foggy pulls away for air and says 'you're so fucking stupid and i hate you' and then matt kisses hIM because uhh, thats FOGGY

and it's a minute later that matt senses another heartbeat and realizes karen's standing in the doorway, and she raises an eyebrow and obviously trying not to panic asks 'uh, foggy, pray tell, buddy, why you're making out with the devil in matt's bedroom' and foggy goes apeshit and tries to think of an excuse that doesn't invole 'uh thats matt' but it just kinda comes out as some stupid shit like 'i,,, uh,,,,, secret,...affair,,?i',m....gay." and matt just sighs and pulls off his helmet like "hey karen. it's me. hey karen whats poppin its me blind matt murdock" and needless to say they all have a Lot to talk abt

DRUNK KISSING:

so like. the first year they're together matt and foggy go out a lot, and it's mostly foggy dragging matt places and matt reluctantly coming because A) if someone doesnt watch foggy this idiot is going to puke and pass out in a ditch and B) he really like his company shh. no telling because that gay

anyways matt usually only drinks a little but foggy is mad lightweight right. he doesn't get shitfaced too often, usually only after exams or when he knows he has no classes the next day. when he does get shitfaced though he absolutley loses his shit and becomes even more touchy than usual, which is VERY TOUCHY because fuck you its my au and i get to choose the default affection levels

so basically. once foggy starts hugging matt and leaning on him and whining into his shirt about the 'hot girls' and 'killer nachos' at the party matt knows it's time to head home and foggy is too busy wrapping his arms around matt to notice he's being dragged out untill its too late

and y'know, thats fine, that's usual, all normal friend stuff, except what foggy also has a tendancy to do when he's drunk is kiss matt. sometimes its on his cheeks, or his forehead, or his shirt?? matt doesnt get that one??? and sometimes foggy even tries to go for the lips when hes particularly wilde. matt knows to expect this by the third time they go out, but it's still always a suprise when it happens, because sometimes it'll be out of nowhere when theyre walking back, or foggy'll stop matt and grab his cheeks and kiss him? sometimes they'll get all the way back to the dorm and matt will make foggy lie down and foggy will grab his shirt and pull him close enough to give him a quick peck before rolling over and promptly beggining to snore

which, y'know, is absolutley great for a maybe-gay-for-his-best-friend-catholic. what's also great is that foggy never seems to remember the fact he kissed matt the night before, and if he does, he definitley does NOT bring it up

so that's fine. whatever. thats life and matt will pretend like he doesnt care when foggy gives him a smooch because hes straight and loves girls and jesus christ, no homo, amen

but THEN. . then matt and foggy have been studying for exams for weEKS and theyre FINALLY DONE, FINALLY, and they are both going to get wasted out of their mINDS you better BELIEVE IT

so they do! and eventually they stumble back to their dorm together and sit together on the floor with a half-downed bottle of tequila and matt decides fuck it. he tells foggy he's never kissed a guy and foggy is like "haha cool. i have." matt's like "haha was it good" and foggys like "hell yeah man better than girls" so matts like hmm. "foggy i think i want to kiss a guy" and you can guess where this is goin

foggy is an oblivious little shit and just thinks matt's having a gay awakening so he's like "oh cool" and matt starts vibrating at inhuman frequency because FOGGY THIS IS THE ONE TIME I"M BASICALLY ASKING YOU TO DRUNK KISS ME AND YOU D O N T" so he just goes "haha yeah." and foggy's like "haha yeah"

and then matt chugs the bottle of tequila and says "foggy i think i wanna kiss you" and then he does but he's a good christian and also stupid so he just like. goes mwah on foggy's cheek

and foggy stares at him for like 15 seconds before basiclly challenging him to 'kiss him like a man, murdock, how are you supposed to get the gay experience if you dont go all in' and then they make out for like 20 minutes and life is good

(they both wake up w the worst fucking hangovers and theyre passed out on the floor and matt's like "foggy....im gay..." and foggys like "haha do you remember i kissed you" and matts like "????foggy i kissed YOU" and foggys like "oh yeah you did. you should have done that earlier" and matts says "????you were too busy trying to kiss me" and foggy goes "oh haha i was. cool" and then they fall back asleep...then they.....boyfriend.s)

FLOWER SHOP/TATTOO ARTIST AU:

so. matt is a florist and he runs a little shop across the street from an empty piece of real estate. a tiny place that used to be a deli but had just the WORST sandwiches, it was no wonder they closed down, god damn. anways. matt runs his shop with his best friends kirsten and karen who have IMPECCABLE taste in flowers and less impeccable taste in impulse control and not being huge lesbians.

one day this dude pulls up into matt's shop. his request is maybe the strangest matt's ever heard - 'can you get me two bouquets of like, the most metal flowers you have? like, ones that just look super cool but also, yknow, smell super good and sick and shit?' 

matt laughs, and tells the guy that yeah, he can't help with the looks part, but he'll make sure to get him some that smell 'quote' sick and shit, come back tomorrow morning and they'll have some ideas-hey, what are these for anyways?

and the guy tells him, oh, hah, i'm moving in across the street, opening a little tattoo place? wanted some flowers to make it seem more, uhh....welcoming. matt laughs and says yeah, sure, cool, and tells him if he has anymore questions to call the store and ask for matt. the guy tells him if he ever wants a tattoo just cross the street and ask for foggy and unless the flowers matt gives him really suck he won't do him dirty and tattoo a dick on him

so anyways, they have a couple meetings, foggy decides on the flowers he wants and thanks matt and tells him hey, he should come check out the shop, it's opening tomorrow, and foggy wants to be able to point to the guy who did the sick florals. matt doesnt have anything better to do and he likes the sound of this guy's voice so hell, he might as well

when he goes over matt realizes oh shit. he really is out of his element here, but he asks the guy at the counter for 'foggy' and is led over to  a corner where foggy's sitting and tattooing...himself? and matt realizes hey. i kind of have no idea what this dude looks like

so he sorta. sits there awkwardly untill he asks like. 'uh. i cant actually see what youre doing' and foggy goes OH IM SO FUCKING STUPID. i'm. man, saying this out loud seems kinda really stupid and cheesy i cant believe i have to do this...i'm....it's one of the flowers in the bouquet you made me....i just thought it looked really neat and smelled good and it....kinda reminds me of you and OK i KNOW that sounds really weird we met like 4 days ago BUT you seem super cool and i kinda hope we can maybe like. be friends or hang out or something,

and matt's like. o//////o yeah okay. uh. thats cool. thats cool uh im sure the flower is really pretty haha i love that type haha UH DO YOU WANT TO GET LUNCH OR SOMETHING haha maybe ill get a flower tattoo one day its pretty cool that you do tattoos UH IM FREE TOMOROW WAIT MAYBE THATS TOO SOON IM SORRY UH IM FREE WEDNESDAYS,

and foggy just kinda laughs and says 'no, tomorrow works,' and hey! they make plans and get coffee together and matt's like so. what tattoos do you have and foggy starts listing a bunch and eventually matt's like :( i wish i could see them they sound beautiful and foggy's like. here. heres my arm can i. yeah ok. and he grabs matts ar,m and he's like ok. feel the skin, its still a little raised can you feel that? ok, run your fingers over here and i can like. tell you wjats there

cue like an hour of sensual arm touching and tattoo explaining and the more matt learns about foggy and his tattoos and the more he hears the way he talks the more he's like A) oh fuck, i kinda really like this guy whos letting me feel up his arms and B) do i want a tattoo? i kind of want a tattoo

anyways. time jump they hang out a bit more, foggy always comes into matt's shop and talks to him in between customers, shows him the patterns he's designing, etc, and one day he comes in with a paper that has a design of some flowers on it and shows it to matt and as he's running his fingers across it he stops and says 'foggy? will you do this to me'

and foggys like 'bud are you sure? first tattoo, right, do you-are you really sure you want to do this, like, when, and wh" and matt's like 'shut up and put this ink in my skin before i chicken out' so matt sits through a PAINFUL ASS TATTOO and when it's done he's like FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT CAN I TOUCH IT FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT and foggy has to physically restrain matt from fondling his tattoo because its FRESH MATT

so foggys like 'ok, this is cause for celebration! babys first ink! we;re getting beers cmon' and they both go out to drink and matt's like 'hey foggy...can i touch more of your tattoos' and foggy's like 'uh, sure, i have another armfull,' and they do that for a while untill matt gets to the one foggy did the first time he visited foggy's tattoo parlor and foggy's like hah. remember this one? and matt's like yeah. i do. and they kinda just. sit there for a minute and then foggy's like 'ok. im gonna kiss you now punch me if you hate this, flowerboy' and matt absolutley does not punch him, thank you very much

and when they finish having their moment matt's like 'wow. i shoulda....i shoulda asked to feel you up again way sooner if i knew you were gonna do that' and foggy's like 'hey...i'd let you feel me up anytime' and they both kind of laugh and decide ok, worm, this works, and decide theyre gonna do that more often

they start to go out for drinks / dinner / lunch / any time they possibly can, and matt learns the curvature of foggys (suprisingly muscley?) arms down to a t, but he runs out of space to run his fingers over one night, and foggy kisses him and says 'hey. i've got more tattoos, y'know, but i don't think many people would appreciate it if i showed them off to you here' and matt is like 'wh-O H'

and foggy laughs and drags him to his apartment and pulls of his shirt and says 'ok, we're alone now. tell me what you feel' and matt sits on the bed in front of him and theres lots of sensual chest stroking going on and then yeah. matt gets fed up with all this touching foggy and not enough of foggy touching him and. they fuck oopsie

and after that they decide worm. that was good, wanna do that more often, holy shit, and decide to actually date date and thats like. thats that babey!

but years later they open a joint shop, an absolute mess of soft/punk aesthetics and everyone knows them because matt is still a soft florist who just has a fewwwww dozen flowers inked all over him and foggy is the punk god who flexes his sleeves all over town but flexes his soft boyfriend husband even more tHE END