#i cant stand them arguing daily

[butchdykenormallen]

.

[lukeevangelista]

enemies to lovers with jj- like them being paired up together for a group assignment and it doesn’t go well until u or jj feels bad and apologizes and….

Enemies to Lovers - JJ McCarthy

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Mb

“He just- he just loves pissing me off!” You hissed as you tugged off your now wet shoes as you complained to your roommates, “He’s a terrible human being.”

“He’s not that bad.”

“He’s at least nice to you.” You grumbled, “We got pairs for this fucking assignment and it’s about to go to hell in a hand basket because we’re just going to argue the entire time.”

“Maybe it won’t be so bad.” Your friend offered as she softly smiled, “besides, he’s a cutie. Might be able to get him to like you.” She giggled, “Him and that girl ended things a while back so he is single.”

“One, gross.” You gagged, “I’d rather lick a dirty floor daily than date him.” You said causing her to roll her eyes, “Second of all, I’m pretty sure I saw them together a couple of days ago.” you shrugged.

“No, they broke up.” Your other friend joined in, “She was complaining about it in class like, a week ago.” She said, “She still hasn’t shut up about it unfortunately.” She grumbled.

You nodded, trying to drop the conversation as you were annoyed about talking about him.

You had tried to be civil time and time again to him and it never did you any good so you started playing his game, being down right dirty to him.

“He’s actually really sweet when you get to know him.”

“Look I don’t need to hear you talk all nice about him- it’s not going to change my opinion.”

*****

“Sup.” JJ said as he sat down next to you, your shooting a harsh glare to him, “So I was thinking-“

“Wow. I’m shocked you can do that pretty boy.”

“You think I’m pretty?” He chewed on his straw as he gave you a smirk.

You slacked your jaw, pressing your tongue to the back of your teeth, “No.”

He scoffed before rolling his eyes. “Anyways, I was thinking about the project-“

“No. What is going to happen is you’re going to leave me to do it while you go live your football athlete life.” You hissed, “I cant afford to fail this and lose my scholarship McCarthy.”

“ I don’t think so.” He sarcastically chuckled, “if i fail this, I’m practically done for the season.” He leaned closer, “I’m not letting you jeopardize my future.”

“Does it look like I give a fuck?” You laughed as you slammed your book shut, “I don’t care what you do, who you do, where you go. Any of it. I do not care about you.” You hissed as you picked up your book before walking away leaving him stunned and speechless.

*****

“Okay I don’t know what the fuck I did to you, but you need to let it go.” He said as he slammed his hand next to your head on the wall. You two had been standing there bickering for the last 10 minutes before he had enough.

You rolled your eyes, ignoring him as you continued to look at your phone, which just fueled the fire.

He grabbed your phone, shoving it in his pocket, “I’m- I’m trying here.” He gritted through his teeth, “You’re making it impossible.”

“Am I?”

“You are.” He lowly replied, “Now, be at my house at 4:30.”

You just rolled your eyes once more, him clenching his hands by his side before you finally walked away.

****

You sat down the street in your car, it being minutes away from 4:30, the time you were supposed to be meeting JJ to finally start this project. You weren’t sure if it was worth it.

At this point, you’d rather fail and have to retake the class than deal with him. You were over the arguing and the tension between you two.

You finally made the decision to not fail the class and put up with the blonde headed boy.

Letting out a heavy sigh, you shifted your car into drive.

It wasn’t long before you were pulling into his driveway, him standing outside smirking.

“Took you long enough.” He hollered as he shoved his hands in his pockets, “Thought your tiny pea brain couldn’t comprehend the directions.”

“Fuck off JJ.” You grumbled as you walked up the stairs, “Let’s just get this over with.”

You two started the project, you writing everything out that you needed. Every time you would look up, JJ would be grinning at his phone or letting out a loud laugh as you worked.

“I fucking offered to do this by myself and you said no. So either get the fuck off your phone or I’m leaving.”

He glared at you as he locked his phone, “Ya know, i don’t understand why you’re so pissy all the time.” He shrugged as he picked up a piece of the project that was supposed to go on the plaster board. He twirled it around in his fingers, “Maybe you should get laid. I’ve heard it helps uptight people like you.”

Your jaw dropped at his comments, “I’m done.” You whispered as you started to pack up your things, “Fail this. I really don’t give a shit anymore.”

“Cant handle the truth?” He asked as you both stood up, “cmon Y/N, just sit back down and let’s finish this.”

“Are you fixing kidding me? After what you said? That’s disrespectful and rude JJ.” You hissed.

“But it’s the truth. You’re uptight and bitchy.” He shrugged, “and ironically, it’s only to me you act like this towards.”

“Because I cant fucking stand you.” You whispered as tears welled up in your eyes, one falling before you could get to it, “You’re a prick. A douche. An asshole. Name it, you’re it.” You hissed, “You might have everyone else fooled, but not me.”

****

It had been days since you talked to JJ and you had almost finished the project on your own. You weren’t going to fail. You couldn’t allow yourself to do it, knowing it effected you more than him.

You heard a knock on your door, you shoving your computer off your lap as you trudged over to the front door.

You yanked the door open, seeing JJ standing there with a bouquet of flowers.

“How did you find my house?” You sneered.

“I’m sorry.” He said as he held the flowers out, “I shouldn’t have been a jerk when you were over and whatever I did to make you hate me, I’m sorry for that too Y/N.” He whispered.

“Take your apology and shove it.” You said, pushing his hand back towards him, “I don’t want your flowers or your apology. I want you to leave me alone.”

“But-“

“Let me do this on my own.” You stated, “you’ve done enough and i can’t handle it anymore.” you slammed the door shut.

**

You two got your grade back, you both getting an A because of all the work you put in.

“Thanks.” JJ muttered to you as he caught up to you.

You stared at him, watching his feature change as you didn’t speak, “Look Y/N.” He stopped as he grabbed your arm, turning you to face him, “I’m genuinely not sure what I did.” He admitted, “But if you would let me make it up to you, I’d be more than willing to do it. I want to show you I’m not this bad guy you think I am.”

You let out a sigh, “I know you’re not.” You tugged your bottom lip between your teeth, “I see how you interact with everyone and you’re not. I guess I got defensive and chose to be like this so I wouldn’t like you.” You whispered.

A grin spread across his face as he looked down at you, “Dinner on me?” He asked.

“Like a date?”

“Like a date.” He grinned.

[gamblersdoll]

𝓕𝓞𝓡 𝓨𝓞𝓤, 𝓘 𝓦𝓘𝓛𝓛. 1

“what is it?” guts muttered out, his eyes somewhat twitching. he leaned against the thickest tree, folding his arms.

“what is your problem?” you gruff out, folding your own. he could never be more oblivious.

“my problem? whats yours?” he grunts, “youve been distant, from whats left of the group and more!” he shouts, obviously agitated.

“yeah, because of you!” you sneered out, growing agitated yourself. you poke at his chest with your index, hard. “after all the shit we been through, you still act the same way!” you flail your arms out, turning your back to him. “cant ever get a conversation from you, and to make matters worse i cant even spare you for a moment.” you rant, looking back to glare at him.

“you have–“

“trouble in paradise.” skull knight sneaks up, standing next to guts. his horse chuffs, and you grit your teeth. “you both still argue after a year and some days.” he sighs, his irises flickering to you and guts.

“y/n–“

“fucking forget it, you think of no-one but yourself.” you grit, forcing yourself from the both of them.

leaving you to yourself.

you and what being left of the hawks, were never staying in one place. having to move every twelve.. twelve? twelve hours, and maybe shorter. not with the brand of sacrificial offering embedded in your skin.

and its hard to find shelter without some sort of problem, only finding a cheap hotel that you could stay at and a bar that had a bunch of low lives. of course, you had to make a stop there. and as in “you,” meaning the entirety of your group.

you looked down at the wine that was in your cup, deep in thought.

he still acted the same, which was valid, you know? but it wasnt valid the way he brooded around as if you hadn’t helped him at all, nor as if you didnt do your damndest. were you both friends? shit, you couldnt tell, you only felt as a place holder.

you look over to guts, seeing his sitting by himself and you want to bite the bullet..

but yesterday? should you even bother?

fuck it.

you move your body to the table he sat at, plopping yourself into the other side of the table and look down at your drink and say nothing.

he stared at you for a minute, then looking to the floor. he felt.. nervous? like he was just in the room by himself and a girl he had been caught playing hooky with.

“you know, youre wrong.” he mumbles, not looking at you. you look up at him though, eyebrow raising and you patiently look at him. “i.. i do care—“

“i find that hard to believe.” you cut off, scoffing and playing with the cup. “you act as if i havent been here for the whole duration i met you. which is five years, going six.” you sigh out.

“its been that long?” he asks, dumbfounded. you nod, “well.. i, i do care. i have cared.” he says, looking to you. “i just, i just want to make sure youre okay, that rickett and casca is too.”

“and i get that, but brushing me off daily isnt caring, at least not to me.” you say, crossing your legs together.

“i dont brush you off.” he says, confused. “when have i ever brushed you off?”

“everytime i try to fucking talk to you, guts.” you retort, looking to him now. “every damn time. yet im distant?”

“yeah, you are.” he retorts back, like a dog on his haunches. “youre distant as shit, and you get angered easily.”

“am i distant, or are you confused on why i dont bother trying to talk to you?” you grind your teeth, tapping your foot. he sighs, relaxing and having both hands on his mug of beer.

“what am i supposed to do?” he says to the mug, tapping on it. “ever since that day happened, its been nothing but hell.”

you relax too, still tapping your foot. “we have limited people and probably time together. why push away the only people you have? not just me, but rickett.”

he never answered that question, yet asking you another.

“what were you trying to talk to me about?” he asks, looking up to you. “i haven’t forgotten.”

you look to the side, pausing your tapping and thought process. “it..” you stop yourself, pondering on if you should even bother with telling with. it was like a itch that you had to eventually scratch, but did it have to be this bad? “its nothing, forget it.”

“no, i want to know what was important.”

“it was nothing, guts.”

he glared at you, pinching the bridge of his nose. “thats one of your problems, you start a rant then never finish.”

if you could punch him in the throat, you would.

you laid in the cheap hotel bed, looking up at the ceiling of wood and slight cobwebs. maybe you should have talked to him, but feelings were so hard, especially now. now of all times. you were finally drifting off to sleep, finally after hours of walking and having to deal with people in the bar.

…

yet whoever decided now was a good time to talk to you was obviously a fool. whoever it was.

you threw the blanket off, rolling out of bed in only a shirt that could cover you up until your lower thighs. your feet padded against the floor, unlocking the door and opening it. you recognize the armor, and the bionic arm that he wore. you looked up to him, and somewhat felt a little warm to see guts.

“its awfully late for you to be askin’ for me.”

“i know, im sorry.” he says, slightly leaning. “i was hoping if i could, come in and talk to you for a minute?” he said, peaking his head in and looking around.

you sigh heavy, opening the door wider so he could enter.

[woodypellets]

so i can post random things but CANT POST MY FICS?!

Off Duty Warning: tickle fic (also no ships) cursing? Lee!BitterGiggle Ler!Toadster Time at: before the whole parent showed up ig.

For Context: BitterGiggle has let the ‘prisoners’ (those lil buckets) escape again under his watch most likely on purpose to see the sheriff needing to catch them all again while telling his lovely jokes, so sheriff toadster stops letting it go and finally teaches him the bitter taste of his own~ (ya see that pun I did there :D)

“…again?! it’s the 5th time this week!” The sheriff yelled at him in disbelief. “Making a whole streak at this point, wonder when I’ll hop over the record!” BitterGiggle made a wink while punning around like how he always does. Sheriff Toadster let out a sigh, recapturing the little prisoners one by one. “Ugh, why do I even let you help me.” “Aw, is the big grumpy croak mad? He’s even crawling down like a real toad now!” “Hey why don’t you actually help out rather that saying those terrible puns.” Toadster groaned The jester gasp dramatically slightly offended “WELL I have two things two say to you. 1.I AM helping you! With my joke . 2. HOW DARE you call MY puns TERRIBLE. How RUDE of you.” “Well not only your puns are terrible so are your jokes” Sheriff said with a grin on his face. “As if your duties (idk how to reference it anymore) are any better!” BitterGiggle complained And here the start arguing again (this is your daily “bro’s moment” having another “peaceful” conversation ) While they were still complaining with each other about the situation, BitterGiggle accidentally hits one of the bars of the jail cell. Usually this wouldn’t do anything but who knew, on top of the cell bar was completely rusted. So pop the bar fell detached itself from the cell. “…oops” BitterGiggle said rubbing his hand. “Well that can’t be too bad right?” right after that all the bars pops of and the whole jail cell came crashing down. “OH YOU-“ “it’s the snakes fault” He quickly pointed to his other half with the snake” “Wait what?” His other half (the purple one ) reacted with confusion. Somehow Sheriff Toadster calmed himself down and asked “since your so good at telling jokes, how’bout I say one to prove you two wrong?” “Hmmm…deal” BitterGiggle agreed with no hesitation but later suddenly regrets it. “Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Toadsted” “Toadsted who?” Standing back a little already scening the mistake he made for agreeing. “Someone is about to get TOADSTED Today!”

part 2: https://www.tumblr.com/woodypellets/750429074370019328/part-2?source=share

[g1rlintun3]

ﾟ･*☆¸¸.•*¨*••*¨*•.¸¸☆**☆¸¸.•*¨*••*¨*•.¸¸☆*･

~𝓢𝓱𝓪𝓭𝓸𝔀𝓼 𝓤𝓷𝓼𝓮𝓮𝓷~ ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ ꩜ Jackie Taylor x Fem!Oc

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

───

Ｂａｄ ｆｅｅｌｉｎｇ

chapter 3

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1202 words

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Chapter 1 Chapter 2 chapter 3 chapter 4

I abruptly woke up to the sound of my parents arguing—what an awesome start to a morning.

Groaning, I felt the pounding in my head and my limbs weighed down by the aftermath of last night's drinks.

My door was soon slammed open by my stepdad.

"Get your ass up!" he barked, his thick country accent almost making me laugh despite the situation.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered, turning away from him and pushing my head deeper into the pillow. He slammed the door shut again, jolting me more awake.

With a sigh, I dragged myself out of bed, slipping my legs over the edge and trudging to the kitchen. I flopped onto the couch, watching TV for a good ten minutes, waiting for someone to mention my ride to the airport.

"Soo, who's driving me to the airport?" I asked, slightly turning my head in their direction. My stepdad sat at the table with his daily newspaper, shaking his head at whatever he was reading. My mom was wiping down the counters. Neither responded.

"Hello? I have the biggest, most important event coming up!" I repeated, standing up and leaning on the couch with my arms crossed, shaking my head in disbelief.

I scoffed, biting the side of my mouth. "Wow."

None of them made eye contact.

"Go on, Eren. Tell her why she can't go," my stepdad said, sipping his coffee, not even bothering to lift his head from the newspaper.

"Wait, what?" I yelled, smacking the side of the couch. My eyes began to water and my heart raced. What the hell do you mean I cant go?

My mom sighed, abruptly stopping her cleaning, her eyes fixed on the rag. "I have a bad feeling," she mumbled, then continued wiping the counter as if she hadn't just dropped a bomb.

"Wow... I'm at a loss for words right now," I said, running my hands through my hair, glancing at my already packed suitcases by the door. I was so excited and ready I had packed extra early.

The room was silent, except for the sound of newspaper pages being turned by my stepdad.

"You know what?" I muttered, speed-walking to the phone hanging on the wall. I picked it up, balancing it between my head and shoulder while flipping through the phone book.

"Rylee, what are you doing?" my mom sighed, giving me a tired look.

"Calling Aunt Lucy," I shot her a glare.

"I seriously think you shouldn't go," my mom practically begged. "I had these dreams, and.. I know they sound stupid—" she started, but my stepdad cut her off.

"Glad you're self-aware," he laughed.

"Rylee, just..." My mom rubbed her forehead. "Trust me on this," she pleaded, looking into my eyes.

I ignored her, finding my aunt's number and dialing it into the phone. Leaning against the wall, I tapped my foot impatiently, waiting for my aunt to answer.

"C'mon," I bit my lip, glancing at the time. I seriously needed to get going.

"Helloo?" my aunt answered.

"Hi, Aunt Lucy, it's me, Rylee," I greeted.

"Oh, hi honey!"

"Uh, I have a question," I muttered, fidgeting with the phone line.

"What's up?"

"Can you drive me to the airport? Mom's being crazy, and I need to go to my soccer event, pleasee," I begged, watching my mom stalk over with her hands on her hips. She gave me a pissed-off look, muttering, "Give me the phone now, Rylee, goddammit," her hand outstretched.

I rolled my eyes and hunched over so she couldn't reach the phone.

"Oh," my aunt laughed. "Sure, honey."

"Yes!" I yelled. "Thank you so, so, so much. I love you—" My mom snatched the phone from me and slammed it back on the mount.

"What the hell did I just tell you, Rylee!" she screamed.

"Wowsa, somebody's angry," I grumbled, massaging my temples. Her yelling had brought back my headache.

Ignoring her yells, I walked down the hall to the medicine cabinet, downing a few pills for my headache.

My mom was diagnosed with acute schizophrenia when I was 10. Before that, she was always... a bit eccentric, but I never thought much of it. She swore she had dreams about the future, claiming she was a psychic. There was one time she was right about something—a minor premonition about a friend's engagement. That only fueled her delusions further.

When I was 9, we had an incident that's still vivid in my memory. My mom stopped her car in the middle of the freeway during an episode. She looked at me with wild eyes and said, "Shadow people are after us and our family, and we need to leave." She dragged me out of the car, and we ran across the freeway, cars honking and swerving around us.

I was so little, I didn't understand. To me, it was all a part of her reality, which she had deeply ingrained into my young mind.

After that incident, my biological dad insisted on a checkup, and that's when she was diagnosed with acute schizophrenia. It explained so much, but it didn't make living with her any easier. Whenever she had these "dreams" or visions, it was best to ignore them and not feed into it, as it would only make things worse.

Recently, I noticed my mom wasn't taking her meds. I found unopened bottles stashed in the back of the bathroom cabinet. Her behavior began to deteriorate, and it wasn't shocking, but it still pissed me off. She has a daughter—how can she do this to herself? She's ruining her own life, and in the process, she's dragging me down too. The fear of her potentially harming herself is always at the back of my mind.

Sometimes, I lay awake at night, listening to her mutter to herself in the next room. It breaks my heart to see her this way, knowing that the woman who raised me is now a prisoner to her own mind. The worst part is the helplessness—I can't do anything to make it better. It feels like I'm constantly walking on eggshells, trying to avoid anything that might trigger another episode.

Despite everything, there are moments of clarity where she's just my mom again. We laugh, cook dinner together, and for a fleeting second, things feel normal. But those moments are getting rarer, and the darkness seems to be closing in on her more each day. But today, when she told me about another dream she had, this one about something terrible happening if I went on my trip.

I mean.. I tried to brush it off, but deep down, it unsettled me. The rational part of me knows it's her illness talking, but the little girl who believed in her mom's visions can't help but feel a twinge of fear.

It's a constant battle between loving her and resenting her illness. The weight of it all sometimes feels unbearable, and I wish I could just escape. But then, I remember she's my mom. And no matter how hard it gets, I can't abandon her. Not when she's so vulnerable and lost in her own mind.

ﾟ･*☆¸¸.•*¨*••*¨*•.¸¸☆**☆¸¸.•*¨*••*¨*•.¸¸☆*･

Authors note: Wheww girlll, we all know whats about to go deoooowwwwn. Her mom being right is going to throw Rylee into a looppppppp😭😭

Alsooo please dont be a silent reader🙏🏻. i LOVEE LOVEE comments so much, i swear im nice😓😓

I had this song in the back of my mind writing this chapter😭😭⬇️⬇️⬇️

[sindar-princeling]

I posted 465 times in 2022

That's 369 more posts than 2021!

235 posts created (51%)

230 posts reblogged (49%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sindar-princeling

@svogliata-mente

@cornerful

@elven-child

@is-it-mungojerry-or-rumpelteazer

I tagged 463 of my posts in 2022

#lotr newsletter - 164 posts

#it's mine my own my precious - 136 posts

#no questions except on party business - 127 posts

#anon - 61 posts

#not lotr - 28 posts

#frodo - 25 posts

#aragorn - 20 posts

#lotr - 15 posts

#rings of power - 15 posts

#samwise - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#i saw the asks and mentions and yall are the best but i cant reply rn because in a minute im flying out to see ✨️❤️david tennant🥰✨️ live

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

absolutely loving the daily dracula idea let's do lord of the rings next

1,660 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

#4

between the newsletter’s entry where we learn the ponies are okay, me picking apart rings of power and analysing why it doesn’t fully feel like tolkien, and this one gifset of frodo and sam i reblogged, i felt like i finally have to gather my thoughts regarding what makes tolkien tolkien

and while there are many things that do, i’d argue that the most special one is its earnestness.

characters in LOTR care unabashedly, with all their hearts, and love so easily, whether it’s platonic, familial or romantic.

the hobbits feel like the most obvious example - merry, pippin and sam follow frodo for as long as they’re able; their loyalty goes deep to their bones, and their relationships are so full of trust, joy, devotion, fondness.

but all of LOTR is just more examples of the same thing. after the war legolas spends the rest of his life in middle-earth with gimli - they travel together for over a hundred years - and then he decides he won’t just say goodbye when gimli dies! and he does something that hasn’t been done before and just takes gimli to valinor, but not before aragorn dies. because they both loved him, too. faramir asks “do you not love me, eowyn?“ and she realises she does, and he says he’ll marry her and they’ll grow a garden and heal, and he kisses her even though everyone can see them. sam loves frodo, and he loves rosie, and he spends his life with her, then joins frodo in the undying lands after she dies.

and it shines through in the movies, too! it’s thanks to both the direction and the acting skills of the cast, of course, that so, so often all emotions are on full display - whenever sam and frodo interact, when aragorn kisses boromir’s forehead, when the hobbits say goodbye at the grey havens, when pippin finds merry at the battlefield, the way gandalf reacts when frodo says he’ll go to mordor, the way theoden breaks down at his son’s grave, the way he cares about eowyn like she’s his own child, the way eomer reacts when he finds eowyn and thinks she’s dead. those are just examples off the top of my head.

it’s also very special to me because in many fictional works (not only in fantasy) people just aren’t allowed to be that open - mostly men, but not exclusively - meanwhile this earnestness is something i always look for in fiction.

it stands out especially if you consider some fantasy creators (not naming any names but you know who i mean ajsjdjfjf) saying they “just want to reflect the misogyny of the period” (which is just bullshit and also demeaning to people of all genders in so many ways), because while LOTR is heavily male-dominated, tolkien managed to do something very, very interesting and important there.

he says, “war is the province of men”, but it doesn’t mean you’re supposed to want to be there. you’re not supposed to want to go to battle, suffer and/or die. eomer wants eowyn to stay home because he loves her, and couldn’t stand to see her die in a cruel, gruesome way (and when he thinks she’s dead, it’s the most devastating display of grief in the whole movie trilogy).

the heroes go to war because there are things that need defending, and dying for a noble cause is honorable, but again - it’s about defending, not about fighting. the clearest villains of LOTR are people who want the war to happen. many of the heroes, most of whom are men, just want peace for their people, want companionship (one of the first things aragorn says to the hobbits is that he’d be happy to have more friends, because being a ranger means he’s lonely), or want a good meal and a good drink like the hobbits. they want comfort and warmth. they want to finish a book like bilbo. they want to live in a garden among all things that live and grow like faramir. they want to marry and have a home and kids like sam.

and the things is, it’s not always that common in fiction, but it’s absolutely common, you know. IN REAL LIFE? BECAUSE MEN ARE PEOPLE? so it’s just really good to have tolkien absolutely divorce masculinity in his works from how his characters show emotions, or how much comfort they crave. and that is a realistic approach i’m interested in.

1,956 notes - Posted October 2, 2022

#3

The previous post made me think some more about the real life influences on LOTR, so because I’m down with a cold and have a lot of time to spare, I finally wanted to write a coherent post about those comments GRRM made about Aragorn and his tax policy.

For those who haven’t heard the actual quote, here it is:

Tolkien can say that Aragorn became king and reigned for a hundred years, and he was wise and good. But Tolkien doesn’t ask the question: What was Aragorn’s tax policy? Did he maintain a standing army? What did he do in times of flood and famine? And what about all these orcs? By the end of the war, Sauron is gone but all of the orcs aren’t gone – they’re in the mountains. Did Aragorn pursue a policy of systematic genocide and kill them? Even the little baby orcs, in their little orc cradles? In real life, real-life kings had real-life problems to deal with. Just being a good guy was not the answer.

And my god, do I have problems with this approach to Tolkien. It’s kind of like asking why Bilbo was unconscious for a lot of the battle of five armies, when we know it was a story Tolkien was telling his kids before sleep.

When looking at LOTR, I think you can’t not read it as an ultimate escapist fantasy - and what’s most important, Tolkien’s personal escapist fantasy.

He is Frodo - a man born into a middle class family, educated, well-read, with close friends coming from the same “social sphere”, like Merry and Pippin, who died in WWI. Sam is in a very literal sense the batmen Tolkien fought with, which he said he considered “so far superior to myself”.

Tolkien had a few batmen during the war, like the article from my previous post mentions. Most probably because he fought in a few different units, but also, he may have lost some of them to war.

And in LOTR, they all get a happy ending.

Of all four of them, Frodo is the only one who can’t return home, most probably mirroring Tolkien’s trauma. He’s the only one whose ending is grounded in trauma, PTSD, loss. The rest of the hobbits get happy endings - very simple and traditional in a way that after the war was nothing but good - they marry, they have kids, the kids marry each other, everyone is happy and lives long lives.

Sam, especially, gets the happiest ending of all in this sense - he marries a woman he grew up with, he has so many beautiful kids, he is mayor for like seven times and everyone loves him, the Shire thrives.

Tolkien was too traumatised after the war not to write Frodo as a mirror of his experiences. But then he took all the people who fought alongside him, who suffered alongside him, people who he lost, and gave them the happiest fairy tale endings he could think of. And it’s not that Merry, Pippin and Sam weren’t as traumatised - this ending is not meant to belittle their experiences - Tolkien is simply giving them the ending that real life didn’t give them.

Returning to the original point, to Aragorn - it’s just another version of the same mechanism. Gondor was struggling, Gongor had Mordor as their immediate neighbours and was heavily affected by the war as well. And then there came a just, good king, and everything was fine. The end. It’s a subplot of the same fantasy as the hobbits’ endings. It doesn’t matter how hard ruling is, we trust that Aragorn is a good king, because people of Gondor deserve a good king (the people of the real world deserved a good ruler who wouldn’t drag them to war), and we know that Aragorn is an honorable, just man.

Nothing about the LOTR ending - apart from Frodo’s trauma - is meant to be realistic. Why would Tolkien want to write WWI and the aftermath - this time fictional.

2,038 notes - Posted September 24, 2022

#2

a friendly reminder 🔫🙂

(ID is added in alt text)

8,910 notes - Posted February 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

between describing elrond as an "ambitious political leader" and describing GoT as a "spiritual successor to lotr movies" I see now how stupid it was to think that the lotr series' intended audience would be you know. lotr fans

9,688 notes - Posted February 11, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[rosaefaerie]

dear kim

my therapist told me to write letters to people, and that i dont have to send them but just to write everything i want to say. and theres so much i want to say to you but i cannot. because i love and care about you so much, i want your life to be free of thinking about this sort of thing. (but then again my therapist did say is it truly best to keep things from people just because we want to save them pain? and i think theres truth to be found in that, if someone really cares about you then they would want to know your thoughts right?....but i suppose i dont think you really care about me much anymore so thats the problem)

what i want to say most is im so sorry for everything ive done and caused all these years to you. i truly am. im sorry for being your friend and betraying you and going to jake, im sorry i never acknowledged how that must have made you feel. i was a bad friend to you. i was in a really bad place in life and i just clung to anyone who showed me a bit of attention and could be a way out of the hell of my daily life, i wanted people to save me. and jake promised that to me, but he lied.

jake hated me talking to my friends. especially you, he would forbid me from talking to you, and thats why i would come and go so much. because he would find out and threaten me with suicide. and i was scared and i didnt know what to do so i’d be trying to placate him always. but i did stand up for you, whenever he would be mean about you. because even if i wasnt a good friend to you i did and do care about you and i wanted you to get along even though i know now not only was that not my job but it wasn’t possible, not because of you but because that person, jake, has something deeply wrong inside of him.

i dont know if you ever knew the extent of what he would do to me, but i remember wanting to tell you so many times. when he moved nearer to me he became gradually more violent with me both in generally and sexually. i remember one day we were sitting on his bed arguing about smoking and i jokingly said something like “i’ll smoke all i want, one day i’ll come and blow smoke in your face” and he grabbed my face and slammed it into his wall behind me. he would often do things like that in simple daily life, suddenly go from 0 to 100 and hurt me. or he would play psychological games with me to confuse and frighten me. the worst was that often, during sex he would get violent. often he would punch and slap me, his favourite place to hit me was in my stomach. it took me a long time to realise, but often when i have flashbacks my torso jerks forwards, as if it was reacting to being punched still to this day.

the worst thing he did to me, which i recently began to remember in full during therapy was making me pregnant. it was a very traumatic and emotional experience and one i struggle to find the words to talk about. it was lonely, terrifying, unknown, disgusting.

i wanted to tell so many people. but i was scared, i was scared of being made fun of for making the wrong decision for going with jake. i was scared of jake killing himself because he would threaten to everytime i told him i wanted to break up. i would self harm to try and make him be gentler to me and it often worked. when i would cut my breasts, stomach, arms, legs, neck. he wouldnt touch me. 

the week before i decided to leave england to move to spain, i never told jake about me moving. i just let the days tick down. and when that final week came i remember sitting in class at school and making a list of good and bad about him, and finally i realised this had to end. because if i stayed in england with him either he would die or i would die. there was no happy future for me there. i had to go. so i had my sister help me to break up with him, and i was finally free.

but that week, he would not stop harassing me from any place he could. my facebook, my phone, my tumblr, he even came to my house and it was the scariest thing i cant even remember what happened.

the reason i am telling you this is because i want you to understand why i would come to you and then run away in anger again. it is because after all that time, i saw everyone in england as my enemy. in fact even when i lived in spain, i saw everyone who showed me love and care as a potential foe.

i couldnt trust anyone, i was terrified of everyone, and for years i have been moving around kim. not because i love change like i always say, but because im scared of trusting people again. its easier to be alone.

and for a long time i saw you as the same as everyone else. everyone else i blamed for what happened. people who did nothing, people who threw me to jake and allowed him back doors into my life again and again when i was trying to escape him.

my mind was so fogged and broken, i just lumped you in with them all i suppose. i tried to convince myself you were a bad person. i tried so hard all the time over and over to convince myself you were evil. ive been trying all this time, because i thought that would allow myself to stop thinking about you all this time. i attributed my constant thinking of you as “obsession”, i was disgusted by it because it is unsightly to have such emotions for other humans. i saw it as a singular problem, rather than a sympton of my constant trying to see you as evil.

that is why, all this time i come and go. it’s this toxic cycle in my head, of trying to convince myself you are bad, being drawn to you, and then getting frustrated at myself because “i shouldnt be talking to you” and leaving. rinse and repeat.

theres nothing you ever did kim that i could blame you for. you aren’t a bad person. for a long time i’d be angry about that day i went to cornwall and met robyn and jake. and jake forbid me from meeting you. i think about that day almost daily. analysing my actions over and over. thinking about every last detail. for so long i was angry at you, for telling me you saw me all that day and followed us around but wouldnt come over and talk to me. i almost convinced myself in my psychosis that you took pleasure in watching jake touch me in public (something he often did to humiliate me, in ways more awful than can be said).

i know now how unreasonable i was. in fact i think i always knew, because why else would i constantly think about that day. you were like me kim, both of us disliked jake. both of us were hurt by jake. i dont know if you would permit me to call you this but realistically, both of us were victims of jake. to varying degrees. and i am so deeply sorry for never seeing that. for being so wrapped up in my own suffering to never see how it could be from your perspective.

like hell would someone who was bullied by jake go and disobey his commands to his partner that they werent allowed to meet their friend. thats crazy. if i was in your position i wouldnt know what to do either. and im so sorry for even putting you in that situation.

i dont expect you to believe me this time kim, because i have come and gone so many times. but i promise i will spend the rest of the time i have trying to be a good friend to you again, and if you dont want that you can send me away and i wont disturb you again. i promise.

i want to say one last thing, because it occurred to me recently. dont you think us being friends is the ultimate act of defiance to jake? considering how much he despised us having any kind of friendship. i thought so, and the realisation of that makes me quite warm inside. to turn hatred into love. anger into kindness.

i hope you are well kim, i truly do.

[peachy-wolfhard]

He’s an asshole but he’s MY asshole (V)

A/N: ngl i cried writing the beginning of this, rewatching the season for this series has been rlly fun (except for the scene where Fei dies rip my queen), OH MY GOD DONT USE THE SCHEDULE THING BC THEN THE TAGS DONT WORK!!!

Taglist at the bottom, feel free to ask to be tagged in upcoming parts!

Warnings: ANGST, girlie u are going THROUGH it, Reggie’s a douche, more angst, y’all almost break up, reader is said to wear a dress but its only a passing comment, drinking, swearing, eating, five might be ooc bc i havent written for him in so long, smoking, sex implications

Word Count: 4.2k

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4 Part 6  Part 7

     Laying on the pool table yet again in the Hotel Obsidian after your brother and other sister died. Can't seem to fucking escape this place. It's like Hotel California. Great now I’m gonna have that song stuck in my head. Laying on your back, head against the lip of the pool table, you admire the necklace Fei had got you when you were a teenager. Yours had said ‘Best’ while theirs said ‘Friends’. Originally they were black with white lettering but due to time, they had faded to a bronze color with black lettering from the years of filling them in with sharpie. Tearing up you curl into a ball and start to sob. My fucking family is dead, my fucking best friend is dead. Now in the fetal position, you full-body sob, not caring if anyone sees. 

     Ignoring the ongoing argument in the other room, you go to the buffet trying to find something small to snack on, finding an apple. Using your knife you peel and slice the apple, cutting it into little cubes. The thought of cubes breaks you again, dropping your knife on the floor and dropping to your knees. I want my family back, I want my fucking family, I NEED them. I need Alphonso’s shitty jokes, I need Jayme’s daily existential dread talk, I need Chris’ happy disposition, I need Fei. Sobbing you slide down the wall silently munching on the apple cubes. After a cry sesh, your arms fall to your sides, brushing the matted-down carpet. Looking forward all emotions drained out of you, feeling empty. Deciding to see what the other idiots are up to you head back toward the balcony.

     Before walking into the room you hear Ben and Diego arguing. Leaning on the column you watch them argue, numb. “Hey, you guys done? The universe is disappearing outside. So you can keep rearranging the deck chairs of the Titanic if it makes you feel better. But the fact remains that we are too late,” Five says. “Come on, Five,” “It's over Luther, we failed.” “Come on. It cant be over over,” Viktor says. “Yeah, come on, Five. We gotta figure this out, man,” Diego insists. “Okay. How about we take a step back? Look at the big picture here. Most of us have spent the last 28 days trying to stop the world from ending. What exactly have we accomplished?” The room goes silent, the Umbrella’s reflecting on their past 28 days. 28 days ago I wasn't in this shithole and had all my siblings. Walking from your column you stand next to Ben, his arms wrapping instinctively around you. Normally, this would make you smile but not now, not after half of your family died. “Well, we made some friends along the way,” Luther says positively. “Incorrect! You know what we’ve done? Nothing. We made things worse every single time,” Five corrects Luther. Leaning closer to Ben your head leans against his bicep sighing. “Don't save the world.”

     “Well, on that…super happy note, we’ve um--oh, what the hell,” Luther says as both he and Sloane stand. “We’ve got a little announcement to make,” “We’re engaged!” they say in unison. “Kill me, Jesus,” Ben mutters making you smile for the first time. Taking the flask out of his hand you take a long drink before giving it back. “Now?” Allison asks. “Yeah. Look, we realize the timing is less than ideal. But, obviously, it's now or never. Am I right, Five?” “Don’t drag me into this, please,” Five says while looking away. “What…Whatever time we have left, we wanna spend it with all of you. So we’re super pumped if you would join us in the banquet hall at 6:00 p.m. for a celebration of our love, and the official union of what's left of our two great families,” Sloane explains. “Dress code is creative black tie.”

     Sloane goes around handing out their wedding invitations when Reggie and Klaus return after being gone for days. Klaus explains that they were tangled up in a father-son end-of-the-world road trip. Klaus’ long explanation ends with him saying that he’s now immortal. Huh, so that's what Diego was talking about. After accusing Klaus of getting into bath salts, Reginald asks why we’re playing with jars. “They’re invitations. Luther and I are getting married,” Sloane says to Reggie. “If he goes to their wedding I'm gonna be even more pissed off,” Ben whispers to you. Ah, your wedding was a magical time full of arguing and absent fathers. Sloane hands him an invitation before Luther tells him space is limited and taking it back. Ben picks your invitation up and looks at it, “Ours were better,” he jokes. “Well I mean it's not like they have marketable powers like us,” you continue joking. 

     “Dad, have you been taking your pills?” Sloane asks. “As a matter of fact, I haven't. And I can confirm that I’ve never felt better in my life. You thought you could dope me up and slow me down, take control of my affairs and squander my fortune,” Reginald says, looking directly at you. He’s always hated me, accusing me of only being with Ben to get a hold of his money, the feelings mutual. “Well, Klaus here was good enough to wean me off that wretched poison, and now that the fog is lifting I can see all your dastardly designs with a bracing clarity.” “You took him off his meds? What were you thinking?” Sloane asks upset. Reginald is then sent into another spiel about how he's the only one thinking and then calls him an impressive young man, causing Diego to laugh. “As for the rest of you, your training is to resume post-haste,” Thank fuck some normalcy in your last couple of days. Ben and you quickly tell him that you're ready. You can tell he’s been waiting for this, to go on a big grandiose mission since the last huge mission was years ago. 

     Five and Reginald start going back and forth; Five mentions that he talked to Pogo. God, I can't remember the last time I saw him let alone heard his name, I miss him. “Nobody wants you here, Dad,” Luther tells Reginald. “Hey, you don't speak for everyone, big guy,” Ben replies holding your entwined hands up. I don't even wanna be around him, he’s done nothing but make Ben and me feel like shit. I mean he didn't even come to our wedding when it was at his own house! “Feel free to join him.” Before Reggie can continue with another one of his long tirades, Klaus interrupts taking him to ‘have a cup of tea’ in his suite. Diego leaves as Lila quickly follows him; Sloane then leaves presumably to go see what’s up with Reggie, leaving you, Ben, and the Umbrella’s alone.

     Walking past Luther and Viktor, Ben holding your hand and pulling you along with him, he overhears Luther mentioning his bachelor party and how “not everyone is invited.” “What was that?” Ben stops making the three of you look at him. “Nothing man, nothing,” Luther shrugs off with a quiet chuckle and smile. Ben quickly continues with you in tow, walking even faster than before. Getting to what you have claimed as your room Ben flops on the bed and sighs deeply. Flopping down next to him you ask “Is everything alright? You’ve been pouting since we left.” Ignoring you and rolling on his side away from you, staring at the wall. “Well, when you want to tell me I’ll be open, not gonna force it out of you,” you say walking towards the door baiting him to say what’s wrong. “Okay fine you pried it out of me,” he says with his usual dramatic flair, rolling onto his back, and staring at the ceiling. “It’s just…why wasn't I invited to the bachelor party?” he asks, completely serious. “Babe, are you joking?” you ask smiling thinking it’s just another one of his pranks. “No, why would I be joking?” he says turning and looking at you now sitting on the bed. “Well I mean you’ve been an asshole to them the entire time they’ve been here,” you tell him. “Listen, I’m gonna find Sloane and see if she needs anything before we get ready.” 

    Walking to what you remember is Sloane and Luther’s room, you start reflecting on Ben’s actions. Being that you were the only person that truly got to see who Ben was or wanted to be. For everyone (and even sometimes you) he wears a mask of a confident, arrogant leader but in those times when his mask slips you can truly see him. An affection-starved man craving any and all affection and recognition he can get. A man that just wants to be loved and seen by his father. Someone who has played a character so long that he himself doesn't know who he is. Finally, you made it to their room, knocking to the tune of ‘Shave and a Haircut.’ You can hear Sloane yell to come in, walking in you see her sitting in a chair hemming a dress. “Need any help?” you offer secretly hoping that she would say no. “Um, not at the moment but thank you,” she smiles. “You know I can't even believe it,” she confesses. “What the wedding or the end of the world?” “Oh shut up, you know what I meant. I just can’t believe I’m getting married,” she says smiling down at her dress. “I mean I always thought and dreamt of this day and now it’s finally here. Did you feel like this?” Sloane asks looking up at you like a little kid asking for their mom’s advice. “Well truth be told no, but that’s just because Ben and I aren't romantics, unlike you and Luther,” you say playfully rolling your eyes at the last part.

     “So it’s official. My ears are broken and the idiot with knives really can’t sing,” Ben says barging in on you and Sloane’s alone time, the first part making Sloane jump at his sudden appearance. “Diego. You know his name is Diego.” Caught in the middle yet again. “Maybe you should try and be nice to him and the others,” Sloane says running out of patience for Ben. “And why would I do that?” “As much as I’d love to work through your anger issues right now, I have to get back to this. The wedding is in an hour,” she exasperatedly said, patience wearing thinner by the moment. “Fei is dead,” Ben says, reminding you about half of your family being dead and you soon too. “Yeah. I know. And so are the others.” “Oh, so that's it? You’re just gonna turn your back on the Sparrow Academy? I mean you heard Dad. we have training to do. Something big is about to go down.” “Ben, shut up,” you jump in, defending Sloane. “I wish you were talking about my wedding,” Sloane says sadly. “Okay, Sloane listen to me--” “No. You listen to me. I’m sorry they didn't invite you to the bachelor party,” Sloane says ever the nicest person in the room. “I don't…I don't care about that.” “yes, you do,” you and Sloane say in sync. “You care more about being invited to the bachelor party than Fei or the others or even saving the world.” “That's--that's... That's crazy,” Ben says chuckling awkwardly and looking at the ceiling before putting the mask back on and going back to his serious leader act. 

     “Is it? The three of us have never been alone. It's always been the eight of us. Now it’s just you,” Sloane says, Ben scoffing at her. “So congratulations, Ben. you're finally number one of one.” Ben looks at you incredulously, “So you’re not a Sparrow anymore?” “Why would I wanna be one?” you say about to cry for the millionth time today. Ben’s face drops for a second, looking you directly in the eyes, sadness written all over his face. “You don't mean that,” he says quiet enough that Sloane can’t hear. “Maybe I do,” looking at him tears in your eyes. “What’s so damn special about them anyway?” Ben resumes the conversation with Sloane. “They’re a real family. They don't exist to sell action figures and tote bags.” “We were more than that,” Ben tries to defend. “Were we?” No, we weren't. We were only a thing to deter crime (which didnt work) and sell merch. Hell, my own wedding had merch. “Why is it so important to you to be a Sparrow?” that's what pushes Ben to leave, quickly he walks out the door just before trying to grab your hand and pull you along unsuccessfully.

     Time for a wedding! Dressed all fancy in a black gown that you found in one of the abandoned hotel rooms. You haven't spoken to Ben in an hour and a half, only seeing him here for the first time in that hour and a half. “What’s the deal with them?” Klaus leans to Five and asks. “I have no idea, could be because we’re all gonna die,” Five says matter of factly. Standing next to Allison, Ben walks toward you, “You look…so fucking good,” Ben says hoping to make amends. “Thank you. You look good too,” you say smiling while taking a drink of your champagne easing yourself into your night of hard-drinking. Standing next to you Ben grabs your hand and starts playing with your fingers smiling. “Hey. I love you,” he whispers, leaning into your neck causing you to smirk. “Love you too,” you say now giving him a sip of your drink. After that Luther and Viktor arrive, “I don't know. Normally, my tush looks good,” Luther says walking out of the elevator with Viktor. As soon as they walk out Allison and Viktor are already quralling. Luther whispers something to the both of them before raising his voice, saying “Bah, bah, bah! My day! Two hours. Do you think you can manage that?” Viktor replies with a ‘fine.’ 

     The elevator bell rings and everyone faces toward to elevator. The seconds that it takes for the doors to open are painstakingly long, making you anxious and excited to see your sister. This was the day she would meticulously plan out when you two were in your teens, documenting everything she wanted in a large binder down to the lighting, and now it's finally here; albeit at the end of the world and planned over a night and a few hours. Looking at her you smile, “Let’s get this over with before I die of cringe,” Ben interrupts the beautiful scene of Luther seeing Sloane in her dress and the sweet moment the two of you were sharing.

      The marriage was ordained by Klaus who gave a very eventful but meaningful officiant speech. Sitting on the left side next to Ben, you interact whenever Klaus says something that warrants it, such as him yelling “Can I get an amen?” to which everyone except Ben makes noise. Glancing towards him he's pouting again. I’m not his fucking mom, I’m not gonna babysit him the entire night. I actually want to have a good last day. “I pronounce you married as shit! Viva la apocalypse!” Klaus yells as Sloane and Luther kiss, making the tiny crowd cheer. After watching Sloane and Luther have their first dance, you start looking at the food spread; the cookies and brownies catch your eye more than the other foods. After putting the food on your plate (and grabbing a bottle of vodka) you turn around to look where to sit. You could sit with Ben and Allison and have the joy sucked out of you or Diego and Lila and have to deal with their mushy love talk or you could sit with Five, someone who you haven't gotten to know yet. 

     Sitting down across from Five he looks up from his food and nods to acknowledge you. Looking back toward Allison and Ben; the latter staring at you. “So I take it things aren't going so good with Ben and you,” Five comments chowing down on a pastry on the table and taking a looong drink. “Rather not talk about that, right now I just wanna get as fucked up as possible,” you say smirking while sitting the bottle down on the table. “Okay, I have some questions,” you say watching as Five pours himself another drink. “Are you actually like a kid or is it some time-travel fuckery?” you ask the burning question that’s been on your mind since you saw him and Ben fighting. Five goes on to explain the first apocalypse and him being stuck there for 40 years and how he’s actually a 53-year-old man. “Huh. so you’re a little old man,” you say as Viktor sits down next to you.

     Getting up from your seat after talking with your new in-laws, bottle in hand you walk toward Ben’s table and flop down in the seat next to him, setting the bottle between you two. The elevator bell chimes making everyone look over and see Reginald walking in, making the room so silent, even the music. Reginald walks over and gets himself a plate and starts looking for a seat. “What is he doing here?” Ben asks rhetorically.  “But who invited him?” “just sit and suffer with me,” Allison says making you giggle. “I can’t even get invited to a bachelor party and he’s invited to this?” “Wow. you really can't relax,” Allison comments making you giggle again. “Y/n, are you okay?” she asks, making a confused face at you now laying your head on the table. “Oh my god, how are you already drunk?” Ben asks in disbelief. “Well you see, in my grief, I perhaps stumbled upon the open bar and perhaps may have started the celebrating earlier than the rest. I mean come on, we’re on the edge of oblivion and you people expect me not to day drink,” you say smirking “And! I’m not drunk yet.” Leaning on Ben’s shoulder, you watch how awkward the wedding has become, no one making eye contact with Reggie. The awkwardness is semi-broken by Lila and Diego, Lila wanting Diego to introduce them. Watching them was nice, Lila and Reginald actually had things in common and got to talking, impressing Diego.

     After the nice moment between Lila and Reginald, Allison had gotten up leaving you and a now pouting Ben alone. Ben and you had managed to drink almost half the bottle in addition to the numerous glasses of champagne. Now you both were laying your head on the table staring at each other, Ben laying on his plate of shrimp. Klaus soon made his rounds to your table; he had been doing this all night walking from table to table and person to person trying to convince them Reggie is good now. Guess it’s our turn. “Hey, Ben-ihana and lovely little eight,” Klaus starts. “Don't hit me!” he jokes sitting down at your table. “I know we all ain’t been best buds in this timeline or whatever, but man, do I have a mission for you--” Ben interrupts him by belching verrry loudly in his face making you giggle, still laying on the table. “Eleven people,” Ben says ominously making Klaus question. “There are only eleven people left,” “Ten and a half, I’m not all here at the moment,” you say making Klaus chuckle. “Okay. Drunk Ben clearly likes numbers and… shrimp,” Klaus says still trying to recover from Ben’s shrimp burp. 

     “And you couldn't even invite me to your stupid bachelor party.” “Oh. Have we finally flicked off bad Benny’s hard candy shell?” Klaus says rubbing his arm. “Why don't you like me? Or us?” Ben asks making you move next to his shoulder, cheek touching his jacket looking at Klaus. “Because you’re huge puckering assholes.” “Okay, but you like the other Ben and y/n,” Ben says annoyed and clearly sad. “Yeah, we love the other yous,” Klaus says with a hint of sadness. “Why? What’s so special about them?” “Because he was a know-it-all. He was a scold. He was a tiny dark cloud on a perfect sunny day,” Klaus laughs after that. “What about me? What was so special about the other me?” you ask now becoming increasingly curious and intrigued. “Oh my god, they were a pain. An emo with a preference for sulking and being pretentious in a corner. Know-it-all just like Benny,” Klaus explains about you, well the other you. “Those.. those are all bad things about us,” Ben says after looking down at his shrimp. “Yeah, and they looked great on you two.” “Okay, you know what? We are so much better than that other Ben and y/n. I was number one--” “Twice,” you interject. “And-and they ripped people’s throats out.” “Oh yeah, did that all the time in my timeline. Does Dad give a shit?” Klaus says before asking Ben. “No. he was busy hanging out with you” Ben whispers poking Klaus. “Oh, man, methinks you might be trying a little too hard. Look around. Nobody’s polishing their boots or pressing their tights. We’re a complete and total shit show. Ya get it? And our Ben and y/n, my Ben and y/n, were just that kind of disaster and it made them ridiculously easy to love,” Klaus says, sighing at the thought of his deceased siblings, before getting up to leave you two alone. 

     The speeches started after Klaus left and went back to Lila and Diego’s table. Reginald was first, talking about Sloane when she was little, calling Luther adequate, and talking about how he wishes that his shortcomings will be seen only as a rough patch. “I’m proud to call you my children, even those I raised in a revenant version of myself,” Reginald continues, glancing around the room before stopping on you, making you look toward Ben in disbelief. Holy shit, the man that wouldn't even acknowledge that Ben and I are married called me his child! Reggie’s speech continues and finally ends with a poem, Allison leaves making everyone look toward the walking woman. “Makes, no sense,” Ben says still eating his many shrimp as everyone starts applauding at Reginald’s newfound kindness. “All right! All right! Time to turn those frowns upside down. This one is for all my party people in the place,” the concierge turned now wedding D.J says, as everyone gets up and starts dancing on the dancefloor. 

     Dancing around with your new family and husband felt nice, it felt like it was just a normal wedding on a normal day. After all of the fast and upbeat songs played then started the slow songs. Arms wrapped around Ben’s neck while his arms around your waist the both of you sway drunkenly together. Looking up at him, you plant a small kiss on the end of his scar making him smile, and put his face into your neck and start kissing it. “Noooo, stop,” you say smiling and pushing him away jokingly. “No, come back here,” he says pulling you back before snuggling his face back into your neck. Leaving the dancefloor you and Ben go back to your seat. While sitting and drunkenly talking Klaus shows up and the three of you start walking around the hotel property.

     Towards the end of the night Klaus, you, and Ben arrive back at the wedding noticeably more drunk than before. “Oh no no no no no!” someone shouts. “Klaus, why are you bringing Ben here?” Five asks. “Hear me out before--” “Hear him out,” you and Ben shout in sync as you take your shared cigarette away from Ben. “The brother that you all knew as Ben is gone. And not-- I don’t mean our Ben, the nice Ben. I mean this Ben, he’s gone now. The asshole, he’s gone now,” Klaus exclaims. “But that's what I liked about you, my asshole,” you say sadly looking at Ben. “Klaus, what are you talking about?” Luther asks. Klaus ignoring his question continues, “And the man that stands in front of you is new new Ben, and he’s one of us, and he’s a member of the team. And he’s part of the family!” Ben and Klaus shout the last statement in unison. “And as a welcome gift, I suggest we throw him off the roof,” Five says making you laugh. “Ha! They like me more!” you gloat at Ben. “Yeah, I’ll help,” Diego agrees with Five. “You know what. You know what. He can stay. He can stay,” Luther says. “And baby eight?” Klaus says holding your shoulders and giving puppy eyes. “They’ve been welcome to stay,” Diego says making you smile as you walk over with Klaus and Ben.

    Almost as soon as you sit down everyone starts heading to bed. Standing up you pull Ben along with you, “I’m ‘sleepy’ if you get my meaning,” you say to Ben too loudly. Taking a moment to understand what you meant, Ben then realizes it, “huh? Sleepy? But-- Oh!” he says before speed walking with you toward to elevator.

Taglist highlighted means unable to tag: @0x1lovesonq @bryannabarradas @onmyumbrellaacademyfanera @4okkotsu @gloriousstudentoperamug @j-panic @salted-fis @siriusly-rem-writes @gamingdevil101 @sanguinelabyrinth @muzanslander12 @mihhggvggh @choichaeyiul @mitsuri-darling @birbtweettweet @choclate32 @ddeonubaby @nao-cchi @i-bitch-you-bitch @mylesofasgard @darlingsuna @blogname197 @mivzai @emmeowo @yanelly1085 @mukbee @aceofspades190 @jui36oxx @iamasimpsstuff @hawkinsbylers @fanficwritersworld @natsgaygf @divergentnewt23 @fantasyfiction-net @electronicvoidcat @benarino @papaskazoo @cole-silas @strawberryheartsstuff 

[absorbedbutler]

hii I was wondering if u could do an Austin!elvis x reader ?

Y/n and Elvis have known each other since they were kids and literally cannot stand each other like every litte thing the other does gets them annoyed and they argue all the time, but one day before one of his performances they get into a really heated argument and he’s just like “wait till I’m done with this show.” And like after he’s done preforming he just fucks her into an oblivion LMAOO

this was really detailed but Austin’s just so fine as elvis like.

the amount of detail i’m in love you basically wrote this for me IM ON IT

tw this is lowk filthy

you had known elvis since you were 4 and your parents moved in to the apartment next to his.

subsequently your parents had become friends, meaning they were either over all the time or vice versa.

as your parents drank and plaid cards, you two were shunned away to a free room where you were forced to play.

you had hated him ever since he got a brush tangled in your baby dolls hair and accidentally ripped out a chunk, bringing you to lock him out on the balcony.

as you got older, sure you were attracted to him but you had to push it down, your hate always over powered it and he would remind you why you hated him in the first place.

the rumors always circulated around school that you were dating but no matter how your stomach flipped when you imagined you two dating, you forced it down.

he was an asshole, really. he wasn’t kind to you, he was cocky, and he would pull your hair any chance he got. it was typical child’s play, every morning at your locker you would put your things away and he would stalk behind you and tug on whatever hairstyle you had that day.

he infuriated you, right?

“tell me right now that wasn’t you.” you said as you pointed to the mess in your room, your clothes all on the floor and your vanity fucked up.

“it wasn’t me.” he said with a smirk, leaning up against your door frame.

“elvis i’m going to kick your ass i swear to god, get out of here so i can clean this up.” you said pushing his solid chest out of your apartment.

he put his hands up in surrender, smiling as he walked out the door.

you had come home to him already in your kitchen, stealing food and looking through your room.

this was a daily occurance, you would yell, he would leave, he’d come back and you’d hang out.

you were hooking your last shirt back onto a hanger as he knocked on your door, as you sighed you made your way to the door, letting him in.

“you calmed down yet, mama?“ he said looking in your eyes.

“that’s nauseating, don’t call me mama.” you said rolling your eyes and turning around as you mumbled a quick “close the door”, making your way back to your room.

he flicked through one of the many magazines you had as you did your homework on your bed, humming.

“did you know i have a performance tomorrow night, it’s this real uppity thing, they want me to sing.” he said as you looked up.

you snickered as he shook his head, “i don’t believe it.”

“cant you you be happy for me? this whole hate thing is a real pain in the ass.” he scoffed.

“elvis, i have never heard you sing or talk about singing a day in my life.” you softly spoke, trying to de escalate the situation as you put your hand in his thigh, him quickly pushing it off.

“no, i’m sick of you acting like a bitch. we’ve known eachother basically all of our lives can i catch a break.” he sneered

“what is all of this, why do you care so much all of a sudden.” you were overwhelmed with the sudden heaviness of the room, looking up at him with big eyes as he stood up.

“only people who know are my folks and you, i thought you could at least push away some of the hatred you have for me and be a little happy.” he was looking out the window now, hand smoothing over his forehead.

“okay, i’m happy for you, it was just a shock. i didn’t even say anything i don’t know why you’re so upset.”

a beat of silence went by before he walked over to the bed, looking down at you. “i try to make things normal between us constantly but all you seem t’care about is hating me.”

you couldn’t get a word out before he started up again, “i’m gonna go, come to the show tomorrow. wait until i’m done with my time slot backstage. we can talk then.”

——————————————————————————

you kept your legs crossed as you sat on the couch in his dressing room, smoothing out the skirt on your dress as you heard the finishing notes to the song playing.

you couldn’t believe it was elvis, if you ignored the fact it was your neighbor it was actually quite good.

you were nervous, things ended very tensely between you two the last afternoon and you could barely sleep because of it.

you stared at the door, mind racing.

he hasn’t spoken a word to you, sneaking you into the back without a passing glance.

the door opened suddenly and you were making eye contact with him.

you saw him in a different light, his hair sweaty and eyeliner smudged, causing your thighs to rub against eachother.

you quickly stood up, hands playing with each other behind your back.

“you like the music?” the said turning to look into the lit up mirror.

you felt instant relief that he didn’t make things awkward, cracking a smile at him in the reflection.

“don’t think i haven’t forgotten about last night darlin’” he said turning around, darkness taking over his features.

he started to walk forward, causing you to move back, gasping when you hit the wall.

“elvis-“ he cut you off with your foreheads touching, causing your breathing to pick up as he moved his hands to your waist.

“don’t think i haven’t seen the way you look at me. these past few years, it’s just been building. you felt it too haven’t you?” he was practically panting in your ear.

“elvis this is crazy, you’re just feeling adrenaline from the show.”

he shook his head against yours, “tell me to stop and i will.”

you paused and let the silence consume the room.

he immediately swooped in and connected your lips, your stomach flipping as you brought your hand to the side of his face.

you had wanted this for so long and now it was finally happening, you wanted to scream.

quickly he moved you two to the dressing table, your lower back brushing against the uncomfortable wood.

you moaned into his mouth as his knee pressed up against you, he pulled away as you intertwined your hands with his hair.

“i know we both want it, but for any reason if you want this to stop talk now.”

you could barely hear him over your breathing but you shook your head, biting your lip.

with a quick nod he grabbed your hips and flipped you over, hands grasping onto the table as you looked up at him over your shoulder, eyes hazy.

he kicked your legs apart from behind and he hooked his fingers into the hem of your underwear, pulling them down and flipping your dress up.

you practically fucked your self against his clothed erection, putting your head into your arms in embarrassment.

“god, look at you, huh? i knew you wanted this as badly as me” he said pulling your head up by a makeshift ponytail.

he took his time undoing his belt and pulling his pants down, he threw his blazer on the couch behind you as he aligned his tip with you.

shoving in slowly, you whined out as you let him stretch you out.

“you can go” you managed to spit out as you felt yourself contract around him.

he slowly started to thrust in and out as he went to kiss your neck, your head pulled back against his shoulder.

your mouth hung open as you turned your head to him, looking up into his eyes as he placed kisses on your open mouth.

your eyes squeezed shut, foreign feelings taking over you.

“don’t act like such a prude, acting like i can’t hear you filling yourself up at night and moaning my name”

you whimpered, humiliation filling your body, but he wasn’t done. “too bad your hearing isn’t as good as mine, bet you would’ve heard me too.”

you couldn’t breathe, tears were coming out of the corner of your eyes as your body tingled against him.

it was sinful, you weren’t even married. but you couldn’t stop yourself from pushing back on him, finding new angles,

you could feel yourself squeezing him, deep groans going straight into your mouth, profanities coming out of his.

his hand wrapped around to rub your clit, causing you to yell out, you could barely keep your eyes open as his thrusts became sloppy.

heat grew at the front of your lower stomach, the pressure getting tighter until he administered one last pinch to your clit that sent you keeling over, crying into the wooden table that the side of your face met.

he worked you through it before he murmured something about not being able to finish inside of you.

before you knew it you were being pushed on your knees, looking up.

he tapped the tip on your tongue, your lips wrapping around it as you moved to cup his swollen balls, from the moan that came from him you could tell he was close.

not soon after he was spilling into your mouth, you immediately swallowed.

after getting up he wiped your chin and you let yourself fall into him, engulfed in his scent, letting your arms wrap around him.

“think this was enough to fix your attitude?”

[apimpnamedlo]

That’s just my Baby Daddy (headcanons)

warnings: fluff, a little angst, mentions of pregnancy

A/N: These are just little headcanons I thought up with @shisoaya 🥰 Thank you bby for keeping my head straight when it comes to these men.

Enjoy!

Eren

For starters, your first bundle of joy was conceived in the last year of your college careers.

Unfortunately, you couldn’t convince Eren that just because you were on the pill DID NOT mean that he could “shoot up the club” 😐

He probably got the message loud and clear when you passed him a positive pregnancy test.

He was probably really upset that you two didn’t have anything together, but you wanted to keep the baby and he respected your decision. Thankfully, this man had a reason to buckle down and start taking his studies seriously. By the time you graduated, he graduated with marks thats showed his effort. Please be proud of him 🥺 he did it for you and the baby!

Gets all of his teachings from Carla and unfortunately, has her and his dad on speed dial whenever you mention the slightest of things.

Mumbles to your stomach in the sweetest broken German, getting a head start on bonding with his baby. He’s really just so sweet 🥺

Wants to know the gender IMMEDIATELY. He’s at every appointment with high hopes.

Probably tears up at the little shoes he comes across, and will walk around the store with a matching pair for the three of you until you reluctantly agree to let him buy them.

You two have a perfectly healthy baby girl, and from that point on Eren has TWO apples of his eye.

Later on in life, Eren took time to make sure the both of you had another one just so that your oldest wasn’t lonely. Your second was a boy. Even then when your home wasn’t rowdy enough? The two of you sat down and discussed adoption. A few years after going through the process, you brought home your second sweet little boy.

He’s so proud to have completed such a loving family with you.

And all it took was him wanting a nut LOL-

LEVI

This man didn’t think about kids when the two of you got married. Honestly, he was probably waiting on you to take the first move when you were comfortable.

But when you asked him to start trying, who was he to say no?

It took time and preparation. Levi wasn’t producing a high enough cell count, and a baby seemed so far away. It seemed over time, the two of you tried everything.

When the light of having one looked a little too dim?

You called him at work with the big news. Finally you two were blessed with a baby.

You think your nesting was bad? Levi was horrible when it came to having the house spotless in the duration of your pregnancy.

Doesn’t want to know the gender until the baby is born. This man is more than excited to be surprised.

The both of you are all too familiar with the house smelling as sterile as a hospital.

Once, Hange came over just to hang out with him and before they could even sneeze? Levi was spraying the air with disinfectant ���� and them-

Bright side? He’s going to spend so much time with your bump as possible, making sure the baby knew he loved him and that he’d be there for them always.

He’s a master at making soothing teas for your stomach or anything else that’s bothering you. I wouldn’t be surprised if he took up giving you rub downs whenever you asked just to make sure you’re always happy. 

And don’t mention the fridge full of whatever you were craving or things to make meals you asked for any time of the night.

Surprisingly enough, yours and Levi’s son was born on Christmas Day, the same as their father. Smooth, evenly scheduled process on his part, he really got things done aside from labor. It really was a miracle that day because out of the pictures you do have with the often stoic man, his smile of pride and joy made everything worth it.

ZEKE

Ever heard of the term one and done?

Zeke has. He wants a kid, but he’s just so busy.

He really makes sure to make sure to work on the two of you first, the first few years of marriage being blissful and full of nothing but communication.

Zeke probably would worry about making the same mistakes as his divorced parents, and that’s why he steadily worked through himself to prepare to give your child nothing but love and support.

Don’t worry. He’s building his fortune in the duration of his residency, and honestly all that’s left is to be able to swipe a card without checking his balance. After that?

He’s on you like white on rice.

Planned sex is definitely a thing with you two, carefully calculated to your fertile windows. This man is skipping work to make sure you two conceive, leaving meetings or family/friend outings without so much as a bye 👋🏾 You two have a baby to make

Before you got pregnant, he definitely tries his best to stop smoking cigarettes 🥺

He’d like to be surprised. Probably will invite your close friends and family to a gender reveal.

When you conceived, he probably already knew. This man studies the hell out of you. The slightest thing will bring his attention to you, and just like that he’s gonna know.

Knows how heavy the baby would get so definitely picks up your belly when you look like you need the relief 🥺 He’s such an observant daddy-

Like Eren, speaks German to your baby but his is much better and thicker in accent. Zeke will speak to your baby and compliment you while he’s at it. He can’t wait to teach them 🥰

“Your mother has to be a warrior to carry you.”

“Calm down, little one.”

BASEBALL. ONSIES. ALL OVER. This man is READY to play catch with his kid, no matter what.

Will argue with the doctors at your appointments. He just will. If he can’t attend, bet your ass he’s gonna chew someone out over FaceTime for even the slightest mistakes.

When your son is born, Zeke is definitely scared after all of his preparations. Would he be good enough? Could he keep his family together? Could he really be the doting father that his son needs?

When he looks into his eyes that are an exact copy of yours?

He’s sure he can.

JEAN

I don’t think you two were trying, but the pregnancy was surely a welcomed surprise.

He’s a mama’s boy, so be prepared to be catered to every second of the day.

Still is gonna complain tho, with the stupidest smile on his face.

Wants another and THIS ONE ISNT DONE BAKING YET-

Honestly, I think Jean would want to know the gender immediately because he’s a little too excited for a baby. And he’s so happy to be having a little girl 🥺

The two of you are probably going to butt heads on names a lot. The two of you have a list of names that are stubbornly crossed out, and you only get two options until one is left standing you agree on.

Is probably plotting out the cutest little outfits with his mom, who’s making sure her son is taking GOOD care of you.

You definitely are going to eat probably the best with him during the pregnancy.

I don’t make the rules, this man’s daughter has him wrapped around his finger when she’s born.

The both of you are neck and neck when it comes to checking her 24/7 the first year of her life. Cant be too careful, right?

ARMIN

Definitely wants kids.

Would be another planned pregnancy, but the surprise came in the form of two sets of feet.

That’s right 🥺 He’d be the proud father of ✨identical ✨twins.

Armin is so gentle through the entire pregnancy. He’s always studying how to best care for them, quietly prepping your home while you rest to house your growing family.

He’s the one to remind you to take your vitamins daily.

You’d be so cherished 🥺 The bby is becoming a father, and he’s gonna be emotional about it. Not out of fear, but the pride and joy just well up sometimes, ya know?

Wants the gender to be a surprise for a gender reveal he planned 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I wanna have a baby for him too-

Has an app on his phone telling him how big your baby is, what they’re the size of, etc.

Slow dancing in the delivery room? I’ve got to say, Armin wouldn’t be scared to get in there and help you through the entire process. He’s probably the most hands on.

When the twins are born, Armin takes sweet time in learning his sons and the littlest things about them. He knows them by how they sneeze, the look of their little toes and the thick mess of hair that looked like a mixture between the two of you

10000/10 would make this man a daddy.

[yesimwriting]

hi, i love all your work! could i please request headcanons for what it'd be like to go from being enemies to lovers with nikolai lantsov.

thank you:)

A/N maybe i moved this up on my request lists bc i woke up today and went 'nikolai lantsov'

--

- i'm being a little liberal with cannon bc my mind first went to 'princess! reader who hates nikolai bc they're competitive and then they have to team up together to try to get their parents to break up their arranged marriage but fall in love in the process (this might be a little undetailed but i'm thinking of writing a full fic or mini-series with this plotline so let me know if you'd be interested!! i could see a smutty ending to that fic but idk,, lmk what you thing ig lol)

- Ok so first off enemies to lovers with the loml nikolai lantsov would be SO GOOD bc he's so dramatic and obviously attractive so even though you hate him you know he's hot,, there's never a dramatic realization that he's attractive bc it's just a fact

- butttt you'd rather give up any claim you have to your family's throne than feed his already gigantic ego

- okk but lets get to the beginning of your enemies to lovers relationship

- so basically every summer your parents go and stay with Nikolai's family at this super fancy vacation home bc your parents are both royalty and your kingdoms have a very healthy relationship

- just bc it's the summer season doesn't mean it's summer vacation,, so as children for about a month you two share a tutor,, and when i tell you that created a rivalry so fast i mean it

- you're not the eldest princess and you're always trying to be the best for your parents approval, nikolai just wanted to impress the really smart girl who had a pretty laugh (poor nikolai lol,, he had no way of knowing how important being the best in school no matter what was to your self esteem)

- maybe if you two could communicate you’d like each other a little better at this point but it starts when you’re pretty young and by the time you’re like 13 it’s a solidified dynamic (and 13 year olds are the MEANEST and most insecure people in the world so that’s when your relationship turns to full enemies)

- now that you’re 13 you have more princess-y requirements, especially over the summer. So when you see that Nikolai gets to practice with swords and gets more free time while you have to practice setting tables you hate him more than ever. 

- Nikolai senses that you’re extra hostile but he has no idea why,, he tries asking once but he makes a joke about how ‘maybe you’re jealous bc youre no longer the center of my attention’ and even though he’s just trying to ease the tension you feel like he’s making fun of you

- so that’s when things get aggressive, but at that point summer is almost over so it’s whatever

- next summer comes and you’re still SO MAD at him,, so when you get to the estate you’re like ‘i’m not even talking to him idc how quiet these next three months are’ 

- and you get there all determined to hate him,, but once you get there and see him something in you cracks bc he had the audacity to spend the last year going through puberty AND LIKE HE’S ALWAYS BEEN CUTE BUT THIS IS SOMETHING ELSE 

- so youre mentally panicking bc how do you even talk to someone that looks like that now???? but then you remember that you didnt even want to talk him so in a panic youre like ‘maybe i can avoid him and he’ll just assume it’s bc i hate him bc i do,, who cares if he’s unbelievably hot now’ 

- nikolai doesn’t assume anything, he just gets to the estate and is like ‘why hasn’t she insulted me yet?? is she suddenly too good to give me attention?’ so during the lessons that you still share he gets an idea

- he decides to one-up you in everything bc that’s always gotten a reaction out of you 

- it works,, every time he corrects you or steals an answer from you, you’re ready to snap but then you look at him and take in his stupidly perfect face and  you just shut up 

- nikolai thinks it’s not working so he just tries harder

- by the end of week one you can’t take it anymore so when the tutor leaves at the end of lessons you snap, you tell him off for how often he’d repeat what you said and change a few words and get all the praise from the tutor

- on the inside he’s like ‘took long enough’ but the more you rant he’s like ‘is she okay???’ he’d be more concerned if you weren’t threatening his pride and at this point he’s still annoyed bc if you were that annoyed you should have just talked to him instead of ignoring him for a week

- he’s thinking that just bc you got really pretty over the last year doesn’t make you too good to yell at him on the daily

- the worst thing anyone can do to nikolai is ignore him LMAO (lowkey relatable)

- so he starts arguing with you and you’re so upset that you forget about how aggressively attractive he is 

- and you two are alone in this room and the more you argue the closer you two get

- the climax of the argument is when neither of you are yelling, you’re just so mad you’re beyond raising your voice and once you’re both at that point it goes like this: 

“Nikolai Lantsov, you are the most insufferable person I’ve ever met” 

“Well then, Darling, you should look in a mirror.” 

“You are so entitled, so ridiculously self obsessed that it ruins your attractiveness.” 

“...” he literally just like blinks twice. “You think I’m attractive?” 

“Uh? No--i didn’t say that at all, maybe if you didn’t have the language comprehension of a child you’d understa--” he just reaches forward, grabs the collar of your dress, and kisses you. 

- it’s your first kiss so you have no idea what you’re doing and it’s with some one you CANT STAND and you’re so mad bc you had expectations for your first kiss and he’s taken that from you--but the thing is,, 

- he’s good at it. Like really good at it. Like so good it makes you curious about what he does the nine months of the year he’s not stuck here with you bc there’s no way he hasn’t had practice. 

- but you’re also extremely confused and nervous and aware of how stupid you’re being (and a little hormonal bc being 14 isn’t easy) and then he places his hand on your cheek and that snaps some sense of reality into you bc it’s one thing to enjoy the kiss but another thing entirely to want him to escalate it

- so you place one hand on his chest and push him off of you slightly. He takes the hint, pulls away enough to look at you and then you two just stare at each other 

- your hand is still on his chest and you have absolutely no idea what comes next, but you find yourself looking at his lips

- since you haven’t slapped him or pulled away more than a few inches he thinks maybe things are okay so he leans forward slightly and kisses you again. 

- you reciprocate a little too fast, the kiss lasts two seconds before thinking about how insane you’re being so you push away entirely. 

- He lets you go,, and in the most awkward display ever you’re like ‘uh I need to go,, i can’t be late to ball preparation lessons’ and you leave that room faster than you’ve ever left a room in your entire life. 

- the next day you consider pretending to be sick to avoid him but that would only give him more power over the situation so you go,, and he’s just sitting there calmly

- youre on edge the entire day but he never even jokes about it

- a part of you is a tiny bit annoyed bc who kisses you and then pretends it never happened? but overall, you’re relieved 

- the days pass and it never comes up but now whenever you two argue you think of how quickly kissing him both shut him up and got rid of your tension 

- the summer goes by quickly, your usual dynamic has returned and you wonder if he even remembers kissing you. twice. in a row. 

- the next couple of years are normal,, even when you two no longer take lessons together you still dont like him. He’s just so assured and he takes such joy in bothering you. 

- and then one summer your parents sit you down and they’re like ‘we need to plan the future alliance of our kingdom’ 

- you’re a little confused bc you’re rarely allowed to sit in on these things bc you’re a girl and you’re basically meant to just be a royal’s bride--and then you realize why you’re there. 

- you start protesting before your father can finish announcing your engagement 

- the parents were smart bc they announced it at the end of summer so you two couldn’t drive them crazy or conspire

- the first thing you do when you get back to your castle is write to him for the first time ever 

- your letter is basically ‘pls tell me you’re doing something’ 

- the two of you talk until you come up with the plan to get your parents to break up your engagement 

- your parents dont really care about your feelings and they expect the two of you to argue with them,, but they care about the kingdoms

- so you two decide that if you act like youre so in love that you let your duties slip the engagement will end,, especially if you two are in love in a toxic way 

- so the next summer you two make sure to flirt and act like youre totally obsessed with each other and skip lessons together and just are constantly together and acting like you’re on a honeymoon

- your parents are like ?? since when 

- at one point you flirt with a random guard just so Nikolai can have a ‘jealous outburst’ while your families are strolling through the garden 

- ngl jealous nikolai had you ready to RISK IT ALL,, you were ready to drop the plan and marry him on the spot 

- he notices bc he notices everything about you and when your family walks away he gives you a quick kiss and youre stunned,, much to his delight 

- your desire to break up your engagement takes a slight backseat in your mind bc you decide to set off on a secret goal to make him flustered

- it doesn’t take much, your dresses get a little more risky, your comments get a little more suggestive

- the only problem?? he seems to have his own personal goal and it’s to make you even more flustered than he is

- soon the two of you are lost in layers of pretend and competition

- when your parents are finally thinking about delaying the engagement and keeping you two away from each other until you calm down a little (i feel bad for them,, an entire summer of being surrounded by the ULTIMATE sexual tension) 

- you’re sad and you don’t know why bc this is what you wanted, but then Nikolai stands up and says that you two planned for this and he has the letters to prove it (he was ready to drop the receipts LMAO) and youre like ??what are you doing?

- and he says he’d rather marry you then never see you again bc now all he wants is to get know you bc he has no idea how he wasted so much time arguing with you 

- and you just meltttt but your in front of your entire family and his as well so you just sit there for a minute and then you tell him you feel the same way 

- but the summer’s over

- you kiss him before leaving and he says you’ll have to visit bc he can’t go an entire year without seeing your ‘pretty face’ 

- you promise to visit him soon

- your at home for exactly a day and a half before getting an invitation to visit him 

- you laugh bc the only way that letter could get to you that fast is if he mailed it before you even left 

- you say yes obviously,, and spend some time having a really cute fall-dating vibes together until you figure out how you really feel 

- and you feel like he makes your heart STOP and that’s why you hated him,, bc you didn’t like being vulnerable 

[heymrstargazer]

(an unintentionally long) daily aftg hc: andrew and neil give the cats a bath. andrew definitely makes them follow a very strict schedule (it is on their calendar) but neil didn't even understand it at first.

"drew they clean themselves, why do we have to interfere?"

"neil i watched you let them play in the flower pots the other day, don't even argue."

but whatever that's completely irrelevant. anyway, they get a nice brush and shampoo and conditioner and everything else they could possibly need (those cats are so spoiled you cant change my mind). neil literally measures their heights with his hands and fills the bath up the perfect amount. andrew checks the temperature then they go to find the cats. see, they did not anticipate the utter fucking fiasco that it becomes the second sir's foot hits the water. sir claws her way up neil's shirt, which obviously freaks king out, but she was already in the water so she springs out and jumps on andrew's shoulders. neil is prying sir off and andrew is soaking wet, trying to get king back in the water before she gets near an outlet or something. it takes him one spilled bag of treats later to get her in the water again, but neil is practically wrestling with sir while trying to calm her down and get her claws out of his skin. when he finally gets her into the bath, where andrew has just finished shampooing king, everything is calm for all of two seconds before sir backs into king. they both jump and splash water everywhere. once again, sir is trying to make an escape like her life depends on it and king is trying to bury herself into andrew's shirt. neil gets distracted because andrew is just covered in soap and water and its hilarious so sir ends up dashing through the house, getting water all over the floors and furniture. king calms down after a second and realizes the water isn't all that bad. andrew and neil sorta take a second and just stand there and think for a second.

"you know, every time we're in the bath they're always trying to get in," neil offers after a few seconds. they both know what that means. "you look like you've been in the bath already."

"well then neil it's only fair that you get in."

a very short-lived glaring contest ensues and five minutes later neil is sitting in the bath with the most pathetic pouting face, only in his boxers with a cat on either side. king is fine, even playing with the bubbles occasionally, and sir is alright so long as she's sitting on neils lap. andrew is not laughing, but neil can see it in his eyes that he finds it more than amusing

[butterflies-and-mirrors]

Y’all I just suddenly remembered about Beryl And Sapphire and wanted to share cause this anime?? Is?? A??? Masterpiece?? Why aren’t more ppl talking abt it??

I can’t even start with how lit this anime is. Literally covers so many popular troupes and genres in just 72 episodes. Like literally has everything you could ask for???

Fluff? What could be more romantic than cuddling with someone you love in a movie theater?

Angst? That one heart-wrenching episode that made us all cry, yes I  am looking at you ep 30.

BL? They have the purest love of all BL stories  I have come across.

GL? Girls. Need I say more? (I am so gay for both of their fem versions)

Straight Romance? There’s something for everyone!

Sci-fi + Fantasy? Scientist Beryl and Wind-rider Sapphire literally stole my heart.  (Look at them omg, what a beautiful and poetic scene.)

Childhood Friends? We get to see them as babies in one episode!!! (Look at their chubby chubby cheeks I wanna squish their face they are so cute fr)

Arch-rivals? Watch them being all angry stares and ‘I cant stand you please get out of my sight’ in one episode and then immediately seeing them as being best friends or a lovey-dovey couple in the next (Not that I am complaining)

Human Knight X Demon King? The forbidden romance. A tale of affection and betrayal. What will prevail? Love or loyalty? I am kidding I am kidding, it’s actually not that serious but it sure as hell is wholesome af. It’s literally one of my favourite arcs in the whole series. So cute and funny and Demon King Beryl is so cool you will literally fall in love with him (Sapphire watch out)

Robot AU? Check. This AU. Omg my favourite. The last episode literally made me scream in joy. Robo Beryl is so precious, he is literally b a b i e. My boy is so cute and wholesome. He is literally the captain of the Beryl X Sapphire ship. He deserves everything in the world and I would gladly give it to him.

This ain’t it at all. There are literally so many other great episodes and if I went into details I have no idea when I would finish .

Also, Bonus:

A Chaotic and Amazing af supporting cast

Yes those two birds. They are both Demon King Beryl’s familiars and both are great characters because-

Yup. they aren’t just cute little birds. Both are strong powerful demons, Elysion, the one on the right, is Beryl’s staff officer and has to deal with the daily assassination attempts on the Demon King from none other than Ashen, the one on the left, who (LOL) also happens to be Beryl’s guard. They should get a whole spin off series just for themselves I tell you. Lowkey shipping them because of that one scene at the end of ep 68 where they are cuddling as birds

Boyfriends.

Flax best girl. No one can argue with that. Look at her. So pretty and cute and everything sunshine. My girl deserved more screen time.

Weiss appeared in like two scenes overall but i bet she’s a great character too.

[early2000smovieimagines]

Meeting and Dating Sirius Black

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

(For future reference, you can also request for marauders era Sirius and Remus but you’ll have to specify in the request since I’ll just write for their characters in the movies if you don’t. )

- You and Sirius meet though the Order. You were a trusted confidante of Moody; which is an accomplishment in of itself, and a talented witch, so when the group was being formed, you were almost immediately invited to join. 

- Like any rational person would be, you were a bit nervous upon meeting the formerly Azkaban imprisoned Animagus. Your mind ran wild with assumptions and visions of the neurotic individual that took up the front page of the daily bugle; more than once, so when you entered the room and found a freshly washed, neat, and charming individual, you were almost in disbelief. 

- It was fascinating to see how different he looked, calmly stood in a room full of people, unchained, and in regular clothing. He was handsome, which is a word you never expected to associate with Sirius Black of all people; though you’d certainly heard rumors of his attractiveness. 

- And you, my dear, are beautiful. Sirius really hasn’t been in contact with anyone for the past thirteen years, let alone a pretty, young woman such as yourself, so the minute he sees you, his heart skips a beat. 

- Perhaps if he’d had time to brush off his old charms; or if they were never put on the shelf to begin with, he would have been able to throw you a line or two, but you completely caught him off guard. Because of this, he was merely able to give you a nod and a handsome smile after the two of you were introduced. 

- The two of you don’t talk a lot at first but over time you do start to warm up to each other. And warm up you do....

- You start having those heat-inducing interactions, the ones with the cheeky comments and the flirting and the innuendos. All of its done away from the group and in close proximity of each other, and sometimes it feels as though you can hardly breath with how smoldering his demeanor can be. 

- Every now and again, he’ll find you in the living room late at night and you’ll share a few drinks until you’re both pleasantly warm. You like each others company, you like your conversations, and you can feel yourselves growing closer by the day. 

- It’s probably a bad idea for the two of you to be together; especially right now, but when has Sirius ever let what’s “bad” stop him from something he’s wanted to do?

- So, he approaches you one day and; in a surprisingly nervous fashion, asks you out, assuring you that you don’t have to if you don’t want to and that he would understand but that he’d be honored if you’d join him for dinner.

- Well, of course you agree, and soon enough, you find yourself having a nice and comfortable dinner with him at the Grimmauld place. The two of you talk and get to know each other, and he starts to feel more confident, getting back a bit more of his flirty charms as the night goes on. And there you have it, the beginning of something beautiful.

- Let’s pretend that he lived shall we; since we all already do that anyway, the two of you kissed a few months into your relationship, mainly because you didn’t have a whole lot of time to spend with each other.

- The group is planning a big mission and you’re saying goodbye the night before it’s supposed to happen. And there's so much that you both want to say but you cant find the words and so, finally, he just leans in and kisses you soft and slow. When he pulls away, he kisses your cheek and says goodnight, and you go to bed praying that everything will go as planned.

- He did his waiting, and now he’s found his soulmate ...so perhaps it was worth it in the end.

- The amount of Pda that the two of you get into really depends on what the world is like at the time.

- Considering the fact that he really can’t be seen in public; for risk of being imprisoned again, your pda consists of him licking your hand, brushing up against your legs, and putting his head in your lap as you pet him between his ears.

- If we’re imagining a world where he isn’t a fugitive then he’d be much more touchy. A hand on your thigh here, a tight hug there; little things that let him feel your presence and know that you’re there.

- Touch starved; twelve years in the most brutal prison of the wizarding world will do that to you. You should see the way he leans into your touch, it’s enough to make you melt.

- His hand on the small of your back or gripping your waist whenever you’re standing together.

- He likes to take one of your hands in his whenever the two of you sit together, usually pairing it with eye contact and a few quiet, romantic words.

- Sitting in his lap.

- Tight hugs.

- Temple and head kisses.

- Your kisses are going to be somewhat clumsy at first, he’s obviously going to be a bit rusty but he gets the hang of it again very quickly.

- Darling, angel, dearest, love, my lovely. You practically get a new pet name everyday.

- He holds you close at night, spooning you so tight that you can hardly move at times. He holds you as though he’s afraid he might lose you, likes you’ll disappear if he doesn’t.

- Sometimes he twitches, whimpers, fidgets, his grip tightening, and his face burrowing into your neck; it’s how you know he’s having some kind of bad dream.

- Gifts. It makes him happy to give you things, to be able to provide for you and make you happy. It feels very domestic; it’s just what he needs.

- Long conversations.

- Sitting together as you bathe. It’s not even a sexual thing; though it can be, you’re just comfortable with each other. You talk, you joke, and you tell each other about your days. It’s relaxing.

- Firelit evenings spent drinking wine and enjoying each other’s company.

- Spending most of your time inside. He’s on the run; if you haven’t noticed, so you’ll have to make do and enjoy what you can.

- Ignoring Kreachers insulting mutterings. You occasionally have to hold Sirius back from throttling the ignorant creature.

- Stargazing and walking around together at night.

- Having dinner together.

- He’s still got some youthfulness to him so the two of you get into your fair share of adventures. He still enjoys a good bit of fun from time to time.

- Visiting Hogsmeade for a bit of nostalgia once everything is over. You both love and hate seeing him there: you love the twinkle of fond memories in his eyes yet hate the melancholy smile that inevitably paints his lips during your trip.

- Listening to stories about his younger days. How fun James was, how they tormented Snivellus, how awful his family was. Occasionally, he’ll trail off sadly and you’ll just kiss his cheek, giving him a tight hug as he assures you he’s fine.

- Harry coming to stay with you over the summer. You’re practically his godmother by now.

- Having Remus and Tonks over a lot. You and the woman become good friends and him and Remus enjoy sitting back and watching their girls. 

- Surprise visits, albeit usually by a black dog scratching at your front door.

- He loves your infatuation with his tattoos. The feeling of your fingers on them or your hand splayed out on his chest is the best in the world.

- Playing with his hair as he lays his head on you.

- Cooking for and taking care of him. He deserves to have someone doting on him after all he’s been through, doesn’t he?

- Lazy mornings spent in bed. He likes pressing a few soft kisses to your shoulders after he wakes up.

- Lots of jokes, many of them dog related. He always has you laughing.

- Smartass comments. You occasionally have to keep him in line; you don’t need someone killing him just because he can’t keep his mouth shut.

- You keep the peace between him and a lot of people. He’s got his fair share of enemies or just people that he doesn’t get along with, and you do your best to ensure that things don’t erupt between them.

- Catching him up on everything that's happened.

- Comforting him during hard times.

- The instant you’re upset or insecure, he senses it and is on your ass, comforting you and giving you words of wisdom. He can always make you feel better.

- He’s not an incredibly jealous person but he does have his moments. He’s surprisingly good at holding his tongue when it comes down to it. He’ll just take you aside later and tell you that he loves you, needing to hear you say it back without any hesitation.

- He’s very protective when he needs to be. He’ll do whatever he has to to ensure your safety. He’s not going to lose anyone else if he can help it.

- Even prior to your actual relationship, you were definitely followed around by a shaggy black dog; whether you were aware of who it was or not. He just wanted to make sure you were alright, and he was bored.

- The two of you really don’t have a lot of fights. He reserves his jackassery for other people so he doesn’t have too much left when it comes to you.

- Whenever you do argue, he apologizes fairly quickly. He hates fighting with you and he wants your little argument to be over as soon as possible, even if that means swallowing his pride and saying sorry.

- There’s quite a few I love yous in your relationship. He loves the smile you get when he says those three little words, and he adores hearing them from you.

- After everything he’s been through, he just wants a nice, happy, quiet life. One that wouldn’t be complete without you.

[bloodycassian]

heavy is the head - Cassian x reader-  reader has to deal with Night court forces in a battle with Spring. Part two likely.

"Look who's come to plead for help." Cassian drawled, looking you up and down. Rhys gave him a sharp look that he shrugged off. You held back your fighting words and approached with false confidence.

"And look at the male who lost a fight to a giant fish." You retorted, giving him the same judgmental look.

"The levithan-" He began, and you swore you saw the Shadowmaster roll his eyes.

"Enough. We have matters to discuss." Rhys silenced him before he could continue. You gave him a sweet smile and turned to the high lord. 

You noted how the shadowmaster smiled. His dark hair glinting in the pale light of the meadow. They all looked alike, the dark hair that reflected the moonlight like a river. The dark wings that blended into the night far too easily. The sight of them made you shiver.

You began before one of them could bring up anything else. There was no other reason for you to call the meeting, it was pain. You were desperate. And if Rhys was so adamant about keeping all of Prythian safe, he would listen. "Spring court presents more of a problem than we thought. Tamlin's son is preparing to invade." You reported, extending your palm for them to see the evidence you'd brought. 

A fragment of an arrowhead tipped in faebane. You kept it wrapped in a leather cloth for a reason. "Where is he getting these?" Azriel asked, his shadows running over your palm and the arrow there. The tinginging feeling they left behind made you sick to your stomach. “That’s out of my pay grade, shadowmaster.” You said with a bitter smile.

 “You’re the next heir to the throne.” Cassian laughed despite himself. He wasn’t a fan of Summer Court after the blood rubies sent to them by the previous ruler. They had recalled them, but the message still stung.

“I am the throne. My father’s time is coming quickly.” You said with a clipped tone, not sparing them any room for further questions before continuing. "Summer court cant risk any more ships to the southern border. We are losing more and more soldiers daily just to hold the line." 

"Perhaps you could train better-" Cassian was full of fight tonight it seemed. And you were willing to oblige, you bared your teeth at him and cut off those words before you could 

"Perhaps you could allow us some help. We are allies if I recall correctly?” You tapped a finger to your chin, earning an eyeroll from the two generals. Rhys just leveled you a cool glare.

"Reluctantly." He admitted, then looked to the sky. "Cassian..." He called. You felt there was some other conversation continuing in their heads based off Cas’ reaction. It was predictable, him acting like such a child. But it still hurt, nonetheless.

"Rhys- No..." He whined, his wings flaring out a bit. You watched the sharp tips of them as they so expertly avoided catching his hair or head. You wondered what it was like having such an advantage. You wondered what all Illyrians thought of the wings, if all of them loved them or if they had mixed opinions. 

You knew a few Peregryns from Dawn court that resented being born with wings because it meant they had to serve in the army. Some even ‘went missing’ to other courts to avoid being enlisted. You wished you had that option at all. But Tarquin would likely send the entire army after you if you had done so. Being his only child meant good training, as well as being very well known throughout Prythian. Just like Kova.  

"We can discuss this later.” Rhys said with a sharp tone. Cassian’s look of betrayal made you wonder what the actual conversation would be about. “Now I need you to pledge forces to our Summer ally. We can't risk Kova moving north." 

Cassian was silent for a long moment. Contemplating. He knew he couldn’t tell Rhys no. Especially in front of a different Court member. But his battle instincts told him hell no. Do not give forces over to someone who dosen’t even know how to handle them. "Cassian." Azriel said softly, his shadows circling his brothers. 

He compromised. "Two legions. I will lead them tomorrow." 

You hated the reluctance in his voice. "Two legions are a sacrifice. You don't know the terror that child brings-"

"Two legions or nothing. Your choice." Cassian said firmly.

"Cass-" Rhys pinched the bridge of his nose. "We will consider more options. For now, we will give you what we can spare in weapons as well as the legions." He held a hand up to Azriel when he made to argue. 

"Thank you, your highness." You gave a half assed bow, and he was gone before you rose. You smiled to yourself at the faint echo of a growl in the meadow. 

+

You donned your most threatening armor and set out to greet the Illyrians. The far hills of Summer court were donned with swaying brown beach grass that hissed in the wind. The ocean spray shimmered above the dark ranks of warriors. The sun did not glint off their armor like it did on yours. 

Cassian's look of distaste said all you needed to see to understand that the Illyrians were not ones for following orders. "One hundred Illyrians. All with weapons that they will take care of." He gave a sidelong glance to the males to his left. They tensed, but did not scare from their general. Whatever they had done must not have been too awful if they were still standing.

Azriel squinted against the Summer sunlight. His shadows seemed more highlighted than ever against the beating sun. "Welcome... I will guide us the rest of the way to the camp." You said, loud enough that the entire crowd could hear you. 

You marched forward, and none followed. 

A male spat on the ground where you had been standing. His wings were gray and tattered, face a strange pale color that didn't match the rest of the Illyrians. A man who had seen too many days for what Illyrians were used to. 

"We dont take orders from a Summer court-" Cassian did not let the male continue. He took the crossbow from his hands, and gave the soldiers around him a nod. They parted around the male. His face went white as a sheet. Cassian's frustration turned his expression into that of a wild wolf. He knew that there would be some to stand against him in helping.

"ninety nine soldiers, I must have miscounted." Cassian announced, and waved the forces forward to follow. You smiled to yourself, and led them through the tall pine and larch trees that made up the forest border with Spring. 

Cassian carried the crossbow the entire journey from the hills to the camp. Summer soldiers did not hide the way they stared at the winged males. Some even moved their setups to be further away. You didn't blame them, but embarrassment ran through you at the message it sent. 

"Half of you will flank Tamli- Kova’s…” You corrected yourself and spat the name. Cassian wondered what kind of hatred lie there. There was obviously something beyond just enemy courts. “-forces from the shoreline. The other half will follow the second front into the border.” You ran a finger across the map. Cassian was thoroughly impressed with your planning. He noted the details of which fronts were where and what diversions were being made by specific groups. 

“Az will lead the flank. I’ll take the front.” He spoke with the confidence of a male who had never lost a battle. He knew Tamlin’s upfront ways on top of it all. He would have trained his son to do the same. 

“Dismissed.” Cassian announced, and the Illyrians went straight to the long dinner table. Az followed, giving his brother a long look before departing. Cassian knew that look. The one that said ‘watch your back. I’m not watching it for you.’ After centuries of giving each other that look, it was enough to rattle him. What exactly had he been doing to warrant that from his brother? He stared at the map on the table. 

He felt your presence before he heard you. Like a snake creeping around, waiting to strike. “This is a good plan.” He approved, then stole a glance to see your reaction. 

“I would hope so. It’s our last push to keep them out of Summer territory.” You collected your pawns from the table and tried not to look at him. He watched you move with fluid grace that was common in Fae.. but you were different somehow. Like you moved with extra care. It made him uncomfortable. Why did it bother him so much? He tried to shake himself from the stupor he felt around you.

He took crossed his arms over his chest, feeling his wings flare at the frustration he was “If you had boats to help that would ensure you winning this.” 

“You mean us winning this?” He bit his tongue. He didn’t like the idea of allying with someone with a reputation like yours. It was dangerous even getting this close. As if you could read his thoughts, you rolled your eyes. “Like I said, we can’t risk any more.”

“But you can risk my people?” The words stung with accusation. With a underlying tone of shame and history there. He tried not to think of himself as fully Illyrian after what they’d done to his mother. But he couldn’t deny that he enjoyed the brutality of the culture. It made him what he was. It forced him to survive instead of dying in those camps alone, freezing to death.

You were silent at the simmering question. He smiled bitterly. “You can say what you want but I brought them here. Now you need to make sure your side keeps them alive.” He didn’t look back when he left you standing there in front of your battle map.

“Heavy is the head...” You thought.

[fxckbuckyscoming]

I Can’t Do This Without You || B.Barnes x Reader

Requested by @momos-peaches: Okay here's another one 😭 (he really lives in my head rent free) So, the reader ends up getting pissed off and is scolding Buck with s a s s because he ended up get really beat up during a mission. She is just cleaning out his cuts and wrapping him up like 'you reckless little shit I cant believe you!-' all the while she gets more and more worked up to tears. This could have potential angsty ending or a more hurt fluff ending, it just depends on how you think Bucky would handle the situation!!!

Warnings: Angst, Hurt!Bucky, fluff ending, language!

Authors Notes: Thank you my sweet @momos-peaches for coming back for another request 😭 I love your requests and I hope you will send more!!! ❤️

Bucky couldn’t tell you how he managed to miss the sniper hiding up behind the derelict buildings ahead. How he didn’t hear their shuffling or the glass bottle that they accidentally knocked over and made it roll. And he didn’t know how he didn’t see the three men leap out from the overgrown grass and tackled him to the ground, knocking him unconscious and left him there with his few broken bones. And if it wasn’t for the quick work of his teammates, who knows what might have happened.

But he could tell you how he knew you were going to be upset with him, it’s the conversation the two of you have often. Your worries and fears of him leaving for a mission and one day he won’t make it back. It wasn’t irrational of you to worry yourself to death because he was the love of your life. Bucky just wished you wouldn’t worry so much. You had your own daily business to deal with, your own things, he didn’t need you to worry about him either. But you did anyway, and your heart fell into your stomach when knuckles tapped your door and you saw Bucky slumped against the doorframe holding his ribs, his face all bloody and battered.

It was a struggle, but when you eventually got him to the bathroom, you sat him down on the closed toilet seat and started removing his tactical gear. The cuts and grazes that littered his body was no joke and you were pissed he could be so reckless out on the field.

“You really had your ass handed to you.” You scoffed, forced to cut away some clothing that the zipper had jammed up on. “I suppose they want you on another mission as soon as possible too right?”

“Y/N please... I’m tired.” Bucky sighed, closing his eyes. He knew you would be upset and the last thing he wanted to do was argue with you when he was in so much pain.

“You’re tired?!” You yelled a little louder than you intended. “I haven’t slept for a fucking week Buck! A whole goddamn week because I’ve been so worried about you and you almost died!” Not only was your anger spilling out, but the tears decided to make an appearance too. Wiping them away angrily with the sleeve of your shirt, you grabbed the alcohol and pads to clean the wound on his chest.

Bucky winced from your heavy hands when you were cleaning out a particularly deep cut. You dabbed it harshly, a small reflection of pain to how you were feeling. The alcohol stung against the wound. “You’re fucking reckless. I can’t believe you’ve turned into a reckless little shit!”

You were struggling to see what you were cleaning behind your blurry vision. Fresh warm tears rolled down your cheeks, your heart absolutely shattered at the thought you could have lost him today. He could have died without you saying goodbye to him or tell him all the things you wanted to tell him. That opportunity would have been ripped from you.

“Doll, please.” Bucky’s breath hitched and through your own tears, you could see his tears too. “Nothing hurts as much as hearing you say that. I’m so sorry I let my guard down.” Bucky’s fingers were itching to reach out to you, he didn’t want to lose you, he couldn’t lose you but the conversation of how dangerous his job really was hit him like a ton of bricks. It’s what you’ve told him all along and he’s always told you it was fine and he was fine but maybe he really wasn’t.

“I just- I just can’t lose you Buck. You mean too fucking much to me.” You fell to your knees between his legs and rested your arms over his thighs. His itchy fingers finally stroke your hair out of your face. Guilt written all over his face and without any words spoken, you know he will do whatever it takes to fix this.

“I’m gonna take your advice doll. I’m gonna talk to Tony and see if I can work within the compound.” His smile that appears on his lips is a promising one.

“No more missions?” Bucky shakes his head and captures your falling tear with his thumb.

“No more missions. I can’t lose you either.” As soon as he tried to lean in for a kiss, he winced in pain and stopped halfway.

“Okay mister. Your wounds are cleaned out, take a shower and-,”

“Join me doll.” He interrupted, standing up but remained hunched over from the pain in his back and ribs. The serum should repair his broken body soon.

“Buck I don’t think that’s a good idea-,”

“I’m not asking for sex doll. That’ll come later, I just need you because I don’t do this alone.”

SSC Taglist: @nikkixostan || @indigo123789