#i cant even imagine what part of the fandom id have ended up in if it weren't for antis scaring me out of most other places

[thatgirlwithasquid]

yknow sometimes i wonder what kind of environment antis think theyre making cause when i first got into the st fandom i really wasn't that into billy. like. i enjoyed his character but i didn't love him

[reco-obsessed]

ok . short debrief on my thoughts on rekos feelings about men because id rather put it as its own post instead of ranting on the tags of that post . just this one time

i think a huge part of reko's harshness on men has a lot to do with possible history in the music industry as a child that gets glossed over a lot, both within the story and by the fandom. of course being sold out by her father is already setting up a poor foundation for her expectations of the men in her life, but even besides that- theres so much inherently about the child star environment thats conducive to her distrust in men.

because i think thats a key part of it. reko isnt just harsher on them for no reason; reko distrusts men.

ytts spoilers under the cut.

she has this interaction with professor mishima in ytts, and i think it explains a bit more of initial poor opinion of him. reko doesnt just think hes some weird guy, she thinks hes some weird creepy guy. which, to be fair, if i some some old professor showing up with a young woman as a pair id probably be suspicious, too.

this is also outright confirmation that reko has had personal experience with men in positions of power who used that to take advantage of young women. but back to the child star aspect of it.

i dont think reko was ever in dan schneider levels of concerning situations, but even if reko never experienced being taken advantage by creepy men directly within her time in the lime light, i cant imagine she didnt find out about others who did. with her father blinded by greed, from her perspective, it mustve seemed like a "near miss" situation even if it never ended up happening to her. theres also how being popular so early on wouldve exposed to her the public eye, and how very well a lot of creepy men couldve been making up the most intense of her fans before she actively rebelled so she could have some autonomy over not just the kind of music she was making, but to the kind of people she wouldve been appealing to with her music.

i think theres also a really important character trait of reko's that gets understated in these conversations: reko is someone who isnt willing to compromise or be pushed on her boundaries.

this interaction may seem innocuous ("of course she doesnt give away that kind of information, its a creepy question"), but it directly contrasts something we learn about the AI earlier:

so not only is this something shes not willing to trust with someone she generally trusts (sara), its also something that as an AI should technically go against her nature.

theres other examples as well- reko shutting down joes fanboying at the very beginning of the game by asking him if its really the time, and of course a lot of her interactions with her brother are shadowed by the fact shes not willing to hide the fact she wants nothing to do with him. then, theres this dialogue tree which hints at a weird interaction between keiji and reko offscreen:

which is again hinting at the idea that reko doesnt give in or try to handle people 'softly' should they cross a line with her. her mixture of self-respect, not worrying about coming off crass, and distrust of (and possible history with creepy) men means she comes off pretty harsh at times; at least compared to what specifically women are expected to behave like, though the majority of it is like more defensive than offensive.

lastly, theres also the perspective of reko as an extremely talented woman in a male-dominated genre. punk, and rock music in general, are both mostly led by men. there are a lot of people out there who discredit women in rock music and will claim they have no musical talent, only being there to serve as eye candy, especially if the other band members are men. its not impossible that she went from making shitty (probably pop music) she hated because of being a gifted kid, and then finally working with the sound she wanted, only to suddenly have people turn and try to claim she couldnt play for shit because she was a woman. and in that sense, her harshness could come from another place too- the fact that its a lot easier to get credit as a man automatically for what others have to work to prove. though this take is the one based most on speculation, both because we dont have direct evidence of reko personally feeling this way, experiencing this, and also because im a westerner and this is based on my knowledge of the western punk rock scene, though id be far from surprised to hear if similar precedents were set in japan.

if you reblogged this and am wondering why i havent mentioned her harshness on men having from originated from her father and brother its cause this rant was inspired by this post that already discusses that

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

HI i just wanted to say that i really enjoy your twilight metas (as those are the only ones ive read so far) and you're a genius. it's awesome to me how realistically you think about characters and the plot, which i have never been able to do because i always get confused. thank you especially for your post about jacob and how the fandom treats him bc ive always had mixed feelings! i love him (the fanon/new moon him ofc) but i also felt rly weird about the whole SA thing, especially as a brown boy thats been villainized (i didnt SA anyone i just realized how that sounds) i understood that it had racist roots but it still...happened, yk? anyways u put it beautifully and its alot easier to understand how i feel about him now. also like everything else u post about!! i despise the cullens w my every being but its so entertaining to see their dynamic and actions laid out. mostly bc it solidifies my hatred but anyways. they also kind of change my views on other characters, like i always kinda liked bella (i dont like alot of things she does but alot of the fan content i see on her made her feel rly relatable) and its rly interesting to see that she would be a kind of absent parent, bc id never considered it like that and it makes so much sense and woah. u have so much evidence to back up ur theories and opinions too--i tend to get lost in fanon but i dont rly do that w ur posts! even ones where ur spitballing its just muah chefs kiss i love. i write alot of self fulfilling fanfiction and tbh it does not feel the same when the characters r too ooc and ur posts have helped a fuck ton! ur super cool and i love ur stuff keep going :)

i do have some questions tho u dont have to acknowledge it at all and ik you tend to focus more on the cullens, but what do you think the wolf pack is like now that jacob, leah, and seth have left, and now that they have so many new members? do you think any other girls would have shifted and how would they be treated? ik leah was kind of alienated in canon not only bc shes a girl but also bc of her feelings, and i cant tell if the pack would be wary of her/treat her the same as leah, or if they would have learned their lesson.

have a good day!

Well first, thank you, I'm very flattered. I'm going to go ahead and acknowledge @therealvinelle here as well as she's I believe the one who originally posted the post about the very complicated topic of Jacob Black and his terrible choices throughout the series.

As for your questions there are a few pack questions in my inbox but it's mostly a matter that people keep asking questions about Bella and she keeps getting eaten.

Also, I'm not sure you want me answering these questions. Like all of Twilight, it's a bleak pit of despair.

But here we go

What About the Pack/Tribe After Breaking Dawn

There's a lot of shit going on in the tribe right now. Jacob leaving is just part of it.

They have an unprecedented number of shifters in the community and that's going to spell... a lot of issues in the years to come.

Namely, per Sam and Emily, domestic violence will be through the roof and kept very hushed up for the understandable reason of these people look like they were mauled by bears. This will also likely increase the number of deaths in the tribe, especially among those who are young. Accidents happen, it's not good, this is going to have a devastating impact on the people.

You also have a lot of angry, disaffected, young men who can no longer really be a part of society. They can't really attend school, can't even really leave the reservation for fear of turning into a wolf, they can't hold a job, at the age of nineteen or younger they each had their futures ripped away from them.

Some, Seth, handle this very well (possibly because he hasn't clued into what this means yet), others like Jake... do not. These people have had their lives turned upside down and in some cases utterly ruined: that's not good in any society.

Then you have the imprinting, lord, the imprinting.

To date, there's the Sam, Emily, and Leah disaster. The three of them handled it very well, but it still utterly destroyed Leah's life and emotional stability. Not helping, of course, is that Leah has had her very identity taken from her, has no privacy, and her only option of escape is to follow Jacob around which... we'll get to in a few paragraphs.

Added to that, you have the Claire/Quil disaster, in which the tribe is desperately trying to handle it by a) keeping it very quiet b) trying to make Quil just be the babysitter. That's unlikely to work out for them and is just angstfest all around and no one's fault.

And then, of course, Jacob/Renesmee. Jacob, having now imprinted, will follow Renesmee to the ends of the earth. He has no other purpose now. Which means that Leah and Seth, who are in his pack, get to follow along and uproot their lives. For the tribe this means they'll never be rid of the Cullens, not truly, and Billy has lost his son entirely. Not to mention it's guaranteed to go awful places.

Then you have the paternity questions this whole thing drudges up, the trauma of these children having to be sacred warriors and having slaughtered demons with human faces, many of whom were also once children and more.

The tribe and the pack are a goddamn mess.

Jacob imprinting on the Cullen hybrid daughter and leaving the tribe? Yeah, it's weird and no one likes it, but that isn't even the peak of the nonsense these people have to deal with.

Would the Other Girls Shift?

No.

Leah seems to have won the genetic shitty lottery. In 600 years of shifting, there has never been another woman, and Leah has all shifting bloodlines in her veins.

It seems Leah was just very unlucky.

Were other girls to shift I imagine they'd face much the same situation. Suddenly teenage boys are witnessing them naked, all the time, they have no choice to become sacred warriors (a role not typically meant for women and which will very much feel like 'the boy's club') and I don't get the idea that anyone learned anything from Leah.

Jake certainly didn't, he just thought she was Uber Bitch until she begged him to let her in his new pack and reminded him she was a human being with feelings.

The concept genuinely had not occurred to him.

TL;DR Remember kids, Twilight is despair

[volfoss]

Giomis 🥰🥰🙏

omg love and light u wanted to see me SO pissed tonight <3333

not even apologizing for this one but if u ship them uh fucking burn <3 but ill separate into bulletpoints for ease of reading

the fucking age gap besties are u really out here thinking an 18 year old quote unquote lusting (from what ive seen from fanon, its uh like that) after a 15 year old isnt predatory

so uh teehee let me kinda go thru some of the points id imagine the gross bitches would make for wow omg giomis canon:

affection: so its literally? like very easy to see that mista is someone thats canonically affectionate (ie stuff w narancia post the sale fight) and absolutely not remotely a reason to be like omg wow theyre so in love wow hes hitting on this 15 year old

the whole gun scene with the cioccolata fight when giorno was literally just?? like not fucking grabbing the gun from his hand, like hes not shooting steadily w one hand so he was steadying himself? especially when he presumably doesnt have a lot of use with a gun

the scene post the ghiaccio fight as if araki hasnt literally done this shit before (which idk to me it kinda uh feels a bit homophobic in the way of not treating gay ppl seriously but besides the point) with avdol and joseph and ive never seen anyone really be like omg this is THE part 3 ship the way that giomis is very much like a prominent part 5 ship

idk like im sure some ppl are bringing up shit like wow they work together in fights (which literally ALL of the main team do) or wow theyre the only two alive at the end but i literally will not go into that tag to find out idc

but onto the reasons i literally just do not get the appeal and hate it and will personally send u to the incinerator if u ship it. there is like 0 chemistry but also fanon understands these two guys like the least? wow i sure love reading fanon where its giorno cardboard cutout giovanna and guido horny as shit to the point its noncon mista

like not remotely that it would be good without the fandom not understanding them at all, but it just adds another layer onto this shit sundae

canons timeline of a legit week or less doesnt remotely give enough time for anyone to really develop meaningful relationships (which wow is why i literally do not understand like ANY giorno ships because dude he knew them for a week at most and thats nowhere near enough time to like get along with anyone or know them enough esp w like idk fugo and trish) but sure we're gonna slam these characters together because wow the main jojo HAS to be with someone else because god the jjba fandom is so fucking shitty with shipping everyone with someone but thats also just a general fandom problem

i just i dont see how hard it is to realize hey maybe lets not do a 15 year old and an 18 year old (im also fucking subtweeting the gross fucks that are also out here like omg trish x mista.... die <3) because literally the 18 year old has a few years on the 15 year old and it can definitely be positioned as a grooming situation

ppl just really fucking slam both giorno and mista with anyone that moves and its like? why? why does watching a show mean u have to ship people? why do people ship BOTH of them with fucking diavolo and members of la squadra? idk maybe its not enough that giomis in of itself is disgusting but people really make shit worse because they just dont know how to handle these characters

its literally just a friendship my guy, did u forget when mista shot giorno like unprompted? idk not like wow omg cute ship material. people just really need to pair giorno with ANYONE and cant even think of him as his own character (also a problem w mista fanon wise, but idk i blame giomis for this bc of how prevalent it is)

its so so hard for people to just realize hey not everything has to be romantic and not everything has to be interpreted as romance

anyways teehee fucking perish if u like giomis and block me 😍

[normal-thoughts-official]

I.t.a (Identity thief anon)

I thought I had replied (if I did and you just hadn't post it it's 1000% fine ahshs)

I love Elliott so much!! And his crush is so cute (but also looking at the bigger picture is hilarious that I killed his would be father in law lmao) also awfullest thing pixelberry did was making me choose if I wanted to be his legal guardian or if I wanted him to be emancipated only to not have to do any of them since, you know, our grandpa was still alive...

Also I thought about it way too much for a choice (with no actual impact) in a game ahshshshhs, emotionally wise I'd have wanted to be his legal guardian but I think it'd make more sense (legally) emancipation because he would still get government help but there wouldn't be a risk of someone taking him away of in case I wasn't a successful guardian, and he could apply for scholarships more easily while I worked or something lmao I was just excited in that part.

I know there are some books in which you can be poly but the only I remember was moty (mother of the year) which was a better than expected book (to be fair I didn't goof have expectations) and in that one I started to date the three love interests <3

How far along are you in endless summer, who are you romancing, what do you think of the classmates + lila and what do you think about the story in general 👀

u hadnt replied!!!! hi i missed you!!

i didnt know u could be polyam in moty! i might try it out then, i never gave it a shot cuz i hate the idea of having kids 😬 but anything for rep i guess

and YEAH I KNOW DIDNDIDNDO i love elliot so much and him and robbie are SO cute together but damn his in law straight up tried to kill us huh. like robbie deserves better than bobert or whatever his name is and im glad to have killed him but

also okay im in the middle of the second book idnfidndidndo around the part where the arachnids show up for jake. my opinions so far are kind of messy but uhhh

grace and raj are my faves, hands down. craig is a close second

i like almost everyone except for jake because hes just military propaganda in a trenchcoat with that annoying wahh im too conflicted to care about anyone white boy complex, and aleister because he was a dick to grace. idc how much he simps for her now she deserves better than him. and Quinn is kind of whatever. like her whole personality is uwu and its kind of annoying but i dont hate her or anything

the story is such a fucking mess?? udndidn i have NO CLUE whats going on 😩 if they manage to make everything make sense by the end ill be REALLY impressed cuz damn wtf is going on

im romancing sean!!!!!! what can i say, i have a type and that type is self sacrificial idiot. he has a heart of gold and he deserves better and aaaa 😭😭 u idiot man stop putting ur life in danger as the instinctual reaction BLEASE. i just want to wrap him in a blanket and make him take care of himself for once

i also like estela a lot but im not really that interested in romancing her ig? i enjoy our moments together but my feelings for her are more casual ig

i rlly want to like lila but i cannot stand her simping for discount tony stark my god. please lord just make it end

i rlly like everyone's dynamics???? its so nice to see how the group has been growing together more and more. i love them ❤️

i LOVE the vaanti. every last one of them. my beloveds. if they tried to kill us it's cuz theyre valid

varyyn and diego are the greatest couple this game has ever given me i am SO grateful for them. i just got to their first kiss and aaaaaa it was so sweet. upset at choices for not giving me art of their kiss when i had to watch aleister and grace's but 😩 its fine im fine. holding onto hope that ill get art of them eventually but i dont want to look it up and risk spoiling myself

i actually like craig and zahra as a couple a lot too which i didnt expect. i still dont fully understand what happened between them but i really hope they work it out :(

on that note i love zahra. anticapitalist queen. cant believe she fucking hacked wall street. id die for this woman even tho she wasted tiramisu

tbh i dont wanna get off the island. like what for? to go to college? when i could stay with the cool vaanti culture and be happy and not have to worry about capitalism and have sick ass tattoos? lets just kill tony stark and stay there besties

really like how they made the MC's past a mystery? like yeah we have absolutely zero past and backstory as per usual but this time it actually is an integral part of the story that we dont know that we were born in la huerta or basically anything about ourselves truly (even tong stinky didn't so like?). and it was nice to see that being a part of the story rather than just this weird feeling of detachment from the MC

the MC is so stupid and i love him

sean and craig are gay for each other. michelle and quinn are gay for each other. i diagnose everyone with gay

i literally dont have a single theory as to what the hell is going on like not one. and i have gotten almost every clue/idol/file but like i literally have no idea how to tie all of this together. this is such a mess didndkdndkdndidn im kind of excited to see what happens because ES seems to be so popular in the fandom i can only imagine the plot is gonna blow my mind, but im kind of afraid of being disappointed

and thats all ive got so far i think? udndidjd god

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[twilightpoison]

Diabetic head cannons but for a different fandom? More likely then you think, because i need to keep myself awake until i can get a second opinion on what to do next. So have fun with my rambles about selected Ikerev boi’s that will not make sense.

Warning: Needles unedited and cursing because lack of sleep

General head canons:

- alright just to start out lets say Alice is from our time, not sure how they dealt with diabetes back in the 19th century but apart of me is saying it wasn’t that good.

- So with falling into cradle really in theory out of the suitors, Kyle would be the only one who would know what the fuck is going on.

- Probably during the chase out of the garden Alice’s blood runs low and she doesn’t have glucoses tablets on her or something. Zero would ask what’s up and she would give a small explanation with Kyle cutting her off to finish her sentence.

- Anyway is already canon that Zero always has lollipops on him so thats how she doesn’t die from low blood sugar and gets like 15 different flavors of lollipops.

- Alice depending on the route would probably end up with him as her doctor and supplier of insulin and needles until the full moon.

Lancelot:

- dude imma be straight with y’all, he’s suffering.

- Do you think he can administer glucagon? He cant even take getting a shot.

- Plus he probably cant even watch Alice giving herself an insulin injection.

- Alice would probably be more considerate with that last one though.

- I cant see Lance’s Alice being the type to just do it in the open because of how much Lance hates needles.

- If Alice mentions about how her world has Pods or sensors that negates the needles, you can bet he’ll get someone to create something similar.

- The first person i think of is Oliver so probably him.

- Despite hating seeing Alice inject herself, he does often make sure she does.

- Carb counting and the conversions he can help with too.

Jonah:

- ey I know the relationship here is built on the mutual love of sweets, and you think because Alice is a diabetic she wouldn’t eat to much of it.

- AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Nah that wont stop her. If anything she would be the type to 100% eat sweets on the regular and not care about it. Trust me I knew someone like this and I too wondered how the fuck was she still alive.

- Once Jonah realizes what’s up though... he probably be very strict on Alice’s sweet intake.

- Alice is probably chaotic enough that he knows he can’t stop her, because lets be real here. Edgar would give her some of his candy so really its the lesser of to evils.

- Would definitely track the blood sugar levels, you would think he was the one that had it. Thats how detailed it is.

- Probably keeps in mind on what foods they like to eat and how many carbs are in there so when the two of them are on a date and Alice is struggling to carb count he knows what’s up and tells her how much to give.

- Jonah would probably be reluctant to stab Alice with glucagon or insulin. He would know how to but its something else doing on someone you care about.

- He would be internally panicking probably.

Edgar:

- tbh wasnt expecting to put him in this but now that i think about it, Edgar would definitely some how know right away.

- I haven’t played his route yet though so there isn’t much I can comment on. But what I can comment on...

- Edgar would always have sweets on him and some how always know how much Alice need to take.

- How the fuck he gets this information I can’t tell you, because I don’t even know.

- Another boy that can track her levels better then she can herself.

- He would probably be able to stab Alice with glucagon or insulin if something happens. I wouldn’t trust him to, but he knows how so its better then no one doing it.

- Definitely wouldn’t panic if something bad happen, he would become serious but nothing else.

- Would always keep a watchful eye for signs of lows or highs.

- After finding out what candies Alice likes he would definitely carry those around him more often.

Kyle:

- havent played this bois route part 2.

- BUT LET ME TELL YOU THIS IS PROABBLY SUPER EXCITING FOR HIM.

- Stressful yes, BUT EXCITING.

- As mentioned Cradle is in the 19th century while Alice is from the 21st. There is so much they don’t know about Diabetes that Alice can tell him about.

- Would 100% try to get Oliver to invent a insulin pump or a Blood Sugar sensor, after hearing about them.

- probably gets into the habit of carrying around glucose tablets and makes sure Alice has all their stuff with them as well.

- Constant check ups for Alices levels and condition, this is a new world that doesn’t have everything she has back at home so they need to be diligent with keeping up with that sort of thing.

- Idk if he would know that sometimes Type 1 can also have Celiac but if he does he would ask.

- If not Alice would probably let him know if they do or not.

- Kyle would probably make sure the kitchen staff knows to give Alice low carb meals most of the time.

- anything to make this easier to control until the full moon.

- This is obvious but Kyle would 100% stab Alice with a needle if in an emergency.

Zero:

- a baby- he always has lollipops on him.

- The first time it was just luck on Alice’s part that he did, but now he is like the go to man to get sweets from. (Aside from Edgar.)

- I dont think Zero would be to involved with helping. Its not really something he knows to much about.

- However that doesn’t stop him from helping out.

- Aside from carrying sweets he also gives gentle reminders after meals or if Alice has a snack or something to take insulin to cover it.

- Would probably be the third most confident with stabbing Alice with a needle if need be.

- You know how he gives Alice those earrings that tell him if she is in danger?

- Imagine him getting something similar but its like an ID bracelet that lets him know if there is an emergency.

- He mostly lets Alice take care of everything herself though.

- Its the small things that he can make alittle better.

- Definitely would be the type to make the frustrating times better with sweet words and cuddles.

I’m not gonna do the black army tonight (today? Idk). I just gotten the ok to sleep. Hopefully my 24 hour lack of sleep brain did good lol.

[rainingincale]

I just saw your tags on the "harry was oppressed" post. Might elaborate on that when you are not tired? How Zayn was oppressed? His relationship to ot4. Other celebrities? I love your thoughts!

*cracks knuckles* buckle your seat belts folks we’re in for a wild ride here lmao.

also for context *here* is the post this anon is referring to

I think to start off i should just make a little disclaimer, everything i am going to discuss will be based in my biases probably seeing as I am also a brown British Pakistani person who is Muslim. Zayn has been someone that especially when i was younger I looked up to and was very essential in my journey of learning to love and accept myself and my culture tbh. It’s cheesy as hell but it’s true and i think this is important to know before I go into this more because like I said i am definitely biased towards him. Another thing is that I’m just going to be discussing my personal opinions and also my memory is not very good so i will probably miss out a lot of other things that happened/could be discussed. please dont take this as anything more than just. my opinion.

A thing that really opened my eyes to racism and especially the racism in the 1d fandom was the day that zayn left. I dont think thats what the post above was about btw and ill go into that but i kind of just want to talk about this. The day he left was. a severe mess. Not only because it was obviously upsetting but because of all the bs that people were spouting about a situation that absolutely no one had any context on. the statement that was released on facebook gave us nothing. literally just stated that zayn was leaving the band and the accusations and hatred people were directing towards zayn when we didnt know what actually fucking happened (and still dont might i add) was disgusting. people accusing him of being selfish and how they hated him and why he had to ruin everything. Accusing him of using mental illness as an excuse and lying about it and so much more. i had unfollow more than half of the people i followed that day. it really opened my eyes to the fact that these were all thoughts and opinions people had underneath it all and zayn was fine as long as he was part of 1d and giving people what they wanted. which was essentially being the token in the group and once he wasnt providing that anymore? people turned and people turned fast.

i think its also important to point out the flip side of it and that was zayn stans saying that 1d were nothing without 1d etc. i want to talk about why this was different from ot4 stans hating zayn. of course it wasnt nice to see or hear EVERYONE arguing with each other. i hated it so much. but i think what people failed to realise was that when it comes to situations like this you need to look deeper and think about all the nuances of the situation. zayn stans being happy about zayn leaving the band and saying 1d was going to die i did not agree with. anyone who knew me then and knows me now knows that i am a 1d stan regardless (preferably ot5 but i supported 1d until the end even as a 4some) BUT these opinions were rooted in his mistreatment in the band and the racism he was having to face as a result of being in the band etc etc i apologise for not being a person who can better describe and explain this situation but hopefully you are getting the picture. when fans were hating on zayn. with no context with nothing. that was based on racism. point blank. the amount of tweets FROM 1D FANS talking about how he was leaving to join isis and how upset fans were gonna be vulnerable and join etc etc all this deplorable bs. and he had to deal with comments like that throughout his whole time with one direction and i imagine even now. 

Another thing id like to talk about is who zayn stans at least from my point of view usually were. For me i remember when i first got into the fandom i actively made the decision that i didnt want zayn to be my favourite because i didnt want to be a stereotype and this was a point in my life when i still tried to shun and push my culture down because i was ashamed of it. it was only as i slowly saw that zayn was considered as cool and hot and everyone else liked him that i kind of understood that maybe. being brown was alright and it was something cool and that maybe i was cool. it sounds fucked up and honestly i dont even know if i want to be admitting this so adamantly but argh if it helps someone understand then maybe its worth it. (mortifying ordeal of being known eh?) anyways i noticed as i engaged more in fandom and looked for more diversity, more fans like me, majority of non white fans were also... zayn stans. and honestly it makes sense because we all tended to flock towards the closest diversity we could find it seems. im not saying that there werent white zayn stans and that the other boys didnt have non white stans but i just wanted to point out this trend. so when you also take this into account and the fact that on the day zayn left it was majorly... white stans who were criticizing zayn it puts it in perspective for you. majority of fans who still like and support zayn are also not white.

there is a lot more to do with fans but hopefully thats enough of an insight and you can understand the kind of vibes that were present during 1ds prime and what not only zayn had to go through but also as a result the racism we ended up having to deal with as well tbh.

now!!!... something i dont really like talking about lol so this will probably be short but the other boys. so as far as i can remember liams always been kind to zayn since hes left (no surprise there <3 also please correct me if im wrong), niall was kind of indifferent/didnt say anything really, and then there was louis and harry *awkward smile*. hahaha. from my memory i remember when asked about what the most difficult thing was about zayn leaving harry said ‘the paperwork’ which was *awkward smile* and he also kicked that monkey mask/pinata? i cant remember with naughty boys face on it and honestly im sure theres more but his overall reaction to zayn leaving was kind of not caring and maybe being slightly nasty which :) with louis there was the massive twitter fight which literally tears my soul in half so lets not go into that haha and honestly other things where it maybe seemed like he was upset with zayn leaving as well. honestly i am a bit in two minds about these reactions because at the end of the day we dont know what occurred behind the scenes and we probably never will as much as we can speculate or whatever. not to mention that this 10th anniversary it seems maybe everyones on good terms which, who knows really im going to try be optimistic. i think whats important to note about heir reactions is that we dont know anything about their situations but the problem was really how fans reacted tbh (btw i forgot to mention earlier this is about basically everything except for harry and the nb thing. that is inexcusable). the boys reactions were understandable but the problem is that fans of course vicariously are influenced by the boy they stan so when one of them acted a certain way of course that ended up reflecting in fandom and resulted in more racism etc. 

another thing with zayn was that there were many files leaked with like promo or whatever basically describing what kind of role the boys would take on/ their image etc. and of course all the other boys got things like bubbly/funny/charming etc and zayns descriptors? moody, mysterious, dark horse etc etc like from the inception of 1d zayn has been victim to racist stereotypes being pushed on him. and i think this is where harry comes in because of course the image pushed onto him was also extremely harmful and i definitely dont think we should not talk about that but often you'll see that... thats all that is talked about because people are uncomfortable admitting racism and talking about it. 

When i mentioned other celebrities my point was basically just that while ive only talked about zayn in one direction this... is so present among any and every fandom. 5sos, Little Mix, Fifth Harmony... any fandom you can think of, i promise you it is there. racism in fandom is a real thing and a big problem and honestly this is why i always say representation is so important. and when i say that i mean everywhere!!! because if I didnt seek out non white fans to follow then maybe i would’ve had a completely different perspective on all of this.

The thing is also that a lot of this is just stuff that we’ve been able to get our hands on and also fan analysis and theories etc. there is probably so much more to talk bout or go into or stuff we’ll never even know about. I’ve kind of had to make peace with the fact that with celebrities you just really don’t actually know anything about them.

I think i’ll end this here if there’s any more questions you have about anything feel free to ask! and again this is all just my opinion  but hopefully i’ve been able to help answer you <3 have a nice day and i hope youre hydrated!!!

[tumblunni]

OH FUCK I THINK I FINALLY CRACKED THE CODE OF WHY I ALWAYS LIKE THE VILLAINS BETTER

Like man it always makes me so confused cos i mean im a soft AF person and i always end up having sympathetic redemption headcanons for them so its not like i like VILLAINY ITSELF but what else do all these characters have in common?

Thats it. Thats it, ursula helped me crack it.

I just WANT THOSE TRAITS ON THE HEROES

I really want a nice confident sassy funny chubby trans auntie who promotes body positivity to our young hero and always gets to say the coolest lines and get the best moments and BE LOVED FOR WHO SHE IS

And like usually whenever you get anywhere close to seeing those "villain traits" on a hero they like.. Remove all the good parts. If you have a supportive hero aunt she's always boring and generically supportive instead, and has to look like the most stereotypical boring mess ans have a super small plot role and uuuugh thats IF SHES EVEN THERE i mean seriously aunties and grandmas are weirdly less represented as mentors than grandpas who are already REALLY HARD TO FIND and again OFTEN GENERIC AND UNFUN WHENEVER THEY GET TO APPEAR

And how damn often are we allowed to have a chubby gay aunt!! WHERE IS MY CHUBBY GAY AUNT!! ive met SO MANY chubby gay aunts in real life like 90% of all my psychologists have been either that or like.. The exact same but a straight lgbt ally instead. Sassy plus size aunties are THE BACKBONE OF OUR SOCIETY DAMMIT! I've had so much help thanks to sassy gay aunts!! And like even just looking at any damn crowd scene in a normal city centre youre gonna see so many chubby aunts and long nosed uncles and all those sorts of bullshit "ugly people" that mass media pretends are ugly and relegates to One Minor Role In The Entire Cast despite them being infinately more common than supermodels and NOT UGLY AT ALL GEEZ IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH

I cant believe im a fuckin disney villain fan cos of body positivity

Tfw u suck so bad at making hateable people that the fandom universally hugs all your villains and ignores your boring protagonists like fuckin TAKE THAT DIDNEY

God i wanna hug hades sooo bad he just needs a friend aaaaaa

And i mean its not just disney, every damn time ive obsessed over a villain its been because they have some trait thats supposed to be "bad" but its actually good and we dont get to see it on the heroes

Like my thing with science villains in particular is that when i first played ff7 i really liked the idea of an evil minion who's a bad sidekick not just because he's "dumb" or "bumbling" but because he's actually not interested in any of the evil stuff and he works against his own boss and is like.. Friendly to the heroes, i have no particular grudge against you and i wont stop you if im off duty and all. I liked the Turks for the same reason but in the origibal ff7 translation they were kind of stoic and serious and i didnt really become as much of a fan of them til i saw them being more goofy and comic relief in some optional sidequests and then their movie adaptation. But hojo was always being all "lol my boss's plan is so stupid amirite" and had that very memorable scene where he's just sunbathing and tells you everything you need to know to get to the next thing to ruin his boss's plan cos i mean fuck it who even cares im just here to soak up some sun while fully dressed in a turtleneck and labcoat. It sucked so much that he was such a reprehensible bastard with creepy sexual assault vibes and murder and child abuse and experimenting on people and basically just NOT A LOVEABLE VILLAIN but his CONCEPT held so much potential to be filled by a sympathetic character instead...

So yeah then cos of him i kept being obsessed with finding SOME CHARACTER SOMEWHERE that actually lived up tp that potential, and thats why i was instantly interested in charon from pokemon and totally on edge waiting for the slightest chance for him to become That Perfect Sass Gramps Of Legend. And then he was indeed sassy!! And had so little screenyime that there was potential for interpretation of him as potentially redeemable cos i mean the game never said he wasnt, the game barely said anything about him at all, lol. And he was so old and small and frail looking and i just wanted to protect him!! And then that one wifi event that actually hinted at synpatheticness!! Aaaa its a recipe for a Forever Fave~

And i guess maybe it all started with my grandma being awesome and me really missing her? Cos i had shitty abusive parents and she was my ONLY good family member who showed me what love was like. And she was also basically a supervillain. Like every damn supervillain trait except being evil! She was bombastic and confident and sassy and mischievious and loud and passionate about stuff and always had something funny to say and never gave up no matter how many times she failed. And she also used all that great power for the forces of good!

So yeh thats why i love sassy good guys and i hate that often even when a sassy villain gets redeemed they seem to lose all their edge and become more generic now theyre a good guy. Or they get totally sidelined with no screentime anymore, or they ONLY get to be comic relief and dont get the full and complex redemption they deserve. Or just a lot of bads!! Its never the simplest answer of just fuckin.. Keep the character the character. Thats kinda why i didnt feel too much for the maleficent movie even though the concept itself sounded like everything i ever wanted. The character in that movie is a very different person to origibal maleficent, she's more just a stoic tsundere mumsy figure than a hammy badass iconicness. Still a nice villain redemption but it felt like it would have been better as an original story instead of an attempted maleficent. Also i wish they handled it better with the whole "true love's kiss could be from your mum instead" thing cos i get sooooo grossed out whenever i see people shipping movie maleficent and aurora! Like yes sleeping beauty with lesbians would be great but not when one of them is old enough to be her mum and raised her like a mum and changed her goddamn diapers! Also why did they have to ruin the three good fairies just to make maleficent have the mum opportunity? Like just remove them from the story if you wanted maleficent to raise the kid instead. No need to rewrite them into incompetant assholes when they were everyone's fave part of the original! Dont sacrifice the rare and elusive Good Sassy Gay Aunts!! THEYRE LIKE THE ONLY ONES IN DIDNEY!!! (Incodentally merlin is the equivelant of this to hades as the fairies are to ursula)

Also also villains tend to have ACTUAL FLAWS in stories that have a more boring bland protagonist. I wanna see the story behind charon's neuroses and how he struggles with overcoming his temptation to be bad because of greed but ultimately manages to conquer his own negative side because power of friendship and such. Thats a great character arc that provides so much more than he does as a villain where they just wasted him entirely :(

SO BASICALLY IN SUMMARY

* villains are often more complex and well developed characters with flaws while the same wroter might make shitty heroes due to the illogical fear that nobody would root for them if they werent 100% perfect and successful at everything ever

* villains are also often made as negative stereotypes of minorities and other rarely seen traits, which means its easy to reach out to them and reclaim them as a more positive version when theres literally no other options for you to cling to

* the quite common accidental sympathy factor where a villain will seem to be hated more than they deserve for their actions, ir unjustly punished so much that they feel like an underdog, since the writer assumes you'll think theyre "more evil" for being a stereotype and if you dont agree that this thing is bad then it seems like they have way less sins than the story claims they do

* also sass. Sass is good.

But basically the whole root of it is that its stupid and cruel and doesnt goddamn work when you make villains bigoted stereotypes. It just makes me love them! The only person i hate when i see a stereotypical villain is the writer who thought that was a good idea, lol. Just imagine that meme of the samurai holding the cat but its me holding all disney villains!

Also even if a villain isnt outright intentionally meant to be "this minority is bad", it can still make me symoathetic to them if theyre still something thats rare amoung the hero side in the same series. Like charon being the "most unredeemable" villain despite being the most harmless and funny and his plan being so much less world destroying than cyrus, and also he's the only grandpa villain in like.. The whole of all. And he's drawn very much in that way thays supposed to be "ugly" i.e normal grandpa, vs that weird sort of younger than he looks grandpa that hero ones tend to be because blablabla beauty ewuals goodness anti body positivity whatever. Tho actually sinnoh was good with that, they had the best grandpa professor in my opinion cos he got to be sassy too! Rowan always reminds me of auron from ff10. Sinnoh was a good game where i liked a lot of both the heroes and villains even if i still had more villain faves cos i mean pokemon is always biased towards that for me since every game has a voiceless perosnalityless main character and often theyre the one doing most of the heroing with the supporting hero characters having surprisingly little proper screen time. Thats a big part of why i loved hau gladion and lillie in sun and moon! They felt more like a real friend group than any other ones before.

ANYWAY now im just going offtopic into more "i love lots of stuff about every pokemon game" so ill stop typing now

But just basically VILLAINS ARE GOOD COS THEYRE GOOD CHARACTERS and if those stories gavethe same character a good guy role then id still love them just as much, if not more. I dont specifically like villainy, its just that my definition of a good character is often considered a bad character by lazy writers, apparantly?

Also WHERE IS MY SUPPORTIVE GOOD GRAMPS CHARON GAME AND GAY AUNTIE URSULA GIVES YOU FASHION TIPS SMARTPHONE MMO

[perce]

me, who hasnt written much of anything in the past year but has been reading way too much fluffy ml fic lately: haha what if i drug up one of my old ml AUs to work on

vague, procrastination/indecision induced rambles beneath

i have 6 in mind that seem like fun to work on. one is best done in bullet point fic bc thats how it started here and thats all it deserves but its still fun. two is mostly just shenanigans with a side of background actual plot. third is chloé-centric set post s1 w/o s2 bc thats when i started it. another 2 are sad and i love them ( 4 being in a weird limbo state of probably being doomed to being an off-putting set of drabbles bc im not sure how i want to end it but the beginning and at least some of the middle are vaguely planned. 5 is. :) haha. i really like this one and the only reason ive not already finished it is bc i got stuck on a chapter but an idea came to me a bit ago that i think might help that.) and finally 6 i actually thought of the other day while reading a fic, despite it, honestly having no connection beyond ladybug-centric, i guess. and puns? i thought to myself a Funny Joke™ and decided that was delightful for what that one shot would actually end up being. which is to say. not as angsty as 4 or 5 bc itd get a light ending but. Potential for sadness on that one.

that all said, i think im especially itching to work on 2, 3, 5, and 6. 4 is tempting but w/o clear direction or inspiration its not. gonna kill me if i dont. lol. 1 is. actually u can search my blog for that its “gabriel isnt a terrible father au” which. christ that’s 3 y/o now. its cute and i have plenty of fun ideas in mind for it but. no clear story for it to follow atm so again not worried abt it seriously. 2, 3, and 5 are like my ml au babies or w/e we call that these days. older concepts bc i kinda fell out of the fandom a good bit before s2 came out, but im a pro at ignoring canon and will happily disregard s2&3 for them. i dont care. i mean 5 is well beyond canon anyway, and 2 is an origins au (i posted the first chapter on ao3 on a whim and have since regretted it in part bc its poorly done but also bc its been sitting there for 2.5 years w/ no updates in sight). 3 is... i guess a post s1 au that id vaguely considered attempting to get at least up and running before s2 started but alas. i love it so much though.. ik ive told sim abt a couple of these and i think i told mickey about 5, and they drew a sad mari in response to that, iirc. 

anyway i just cant seem to pick one and stick with it so here i am rambling really vaguely about them instead bc fuck it. i like ml aus but insist on keeping them to myself (mostly) until ive written them but then not actually writing them. rip. side eyes my danphan raised by ghosts au. my old friend. and all my other dp aus.

i even have a red pencil and pen to write with i just gotta DO IT. hh

edit: you know the real disappointment here? i have pv aus, one i really wanna try my hand at, ahem bc the other pv fic id actually want to bother with would be my straight up whole entire take of however that wouldve gone over, its been too long since ive interacted with a lot of pv content and id need to brush up quite a bit. and thus am not feeling as inspired for it rn. or my hyper niche pv warcraft crossover au thing that i cannot imagine anyone else out there would care about. also i think ive forgotten most of the ideas i’d had for it before which sucks.  guess this is just how im gonna be sad about the pv for now. ironic considering my icon lol

[luxexhomines]

S

Ahhh, thank you guys so much for asking!! I just compiled them all into one post so I don’t clog up your dash with several posts. Here we go! I’m going to tag this as discourse and put a cut because my answers to the letters might not please everyone, aha. It’s long, too. Major spoilers for NDRV3.

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Honestly, I’m not super sure at this point. Surprise, surprise, I only just recently finished watching the rest of NDRV3 and started writing for it. And I haven’t thought about tropes that much, though I’m sure I’ve written plenty of them into my writing at some point, even if not posted on here. 

If we’re going to go Danganronpa-centric, as this is my side blog for Danganronpa writing, I’d say that I fall in love with characters that are contradictory and with seemingly bipolar or gray morals despite probably having morals as straight as an arrow myself, i.e. Nagito or Kokichi. The characters playing “straight man” and relating to the reader’s perspective are also my favorite; in a wacky situation, they offer reason and normal reactions, which I would peg Hajime as (maybe Kazuichi, too, although he’s more of a crybaby). In fanfiction, I just love hurt & comfort fics, especially involving–you guessed it–Kokichi. I am particularly partial to the Oumota chapter 5 and chapter 5 trial rewrites, which, lucky for me, both of which are quite often rewritten by spectacular writers.

If we’re going in general, I always end up reading manga with an independent, strong and decisive character that crosses worlds and/or bodies by accident or death and becomes incredibly powerful/influential in the world and dominates over other characters with skills ranging from cooking to fighting. I guess I read a lot of manhua with martial arts or other manga with game aspects to it.Writing-wise, I love reading slow burn fics, even if I haven’t read one in quite some time. 

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

I have a feeling this is going to go into highly controversial areas, so if you ultra ship Kaito x Maki, please turn away now...

I just hate that “man saves woman” from herself or traumatic past trope. Don’t get me wrong, I love hurt/comfort like I mentioned, but to specify, what I mean is when a strong and independent woman needs saving by a man. I realize Maki has a lot of issues from her past as an assassin and that Kaito is a viable, good option for helping her out and facing those issues, but the fact of him being a man and the way he just swoops in and fixes things forcefully by pulling her along for training just irks me. And before you ask, yes, if Kaede did it instead as a woman I would have less of a problem with it, even if I don’t like that somehow after a couple days of training together Maki somehow is better able to get along with others and most notably Shuichi despite having spent the previous entire time cooped up in her Ultimate room alone, is willing to use her experience as an assassin to help out with the investigation when she just walked out in the past, etc. Problems from a past like that would never be so easily faced in reality; people and their minds are much more stubborn than we’d like to think, too. 

In general, I am also highly averse to the Women in Refrigerators trope. To some extent, I feel that Kaede fits this trope, as a.) she is an important, pivotal, incredibly fleshed out female character and even the initial protagonist of ndrv3, b.) she dies arbitrarily for a murder she did not commit, c.) a big part of her death is written into Shuichi’s character development for making him grow as the protagonist (he sheds the cap, faces the truth, and the memory of Kaede’s last wishes serves as his support to reveal the truth several times in trial), and of course, d.) her death in the execution is grotesque as befitting of a Danganronpa execution. Kaede deserved so. much. more.

There are probably more out there, but I won’t mention them for the sake of length & time. 

U: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much.

Okay! So don’t hate me for this, but I haven’t been really keeping up a bunch with fanfiction writers or specific ones that much. It just hasn’t ever been a habit of mine in the past to follow one writer–ironic, I know. There’s one that immediately comes to mind, but she’s not part of the Danganronpa fandom, so unless someone asks, I’ll leave her out of it. However, there are a couple of writers that I recently discovered through the Oumota weekend event and which I follow on my main blog, and I thoroughly enjoy reading their work. Their work also contains mentions of NDRV3 spoilers!

1. @kirastrations

I recently reblogged her work on this blog because I have so much love for the Oumota fic she wrote (which deserves more love!). It’s called One by One, One After Another, and I simply adore the way she writes Kaito’s character and experiences with the other characters throughout the game and the overarching feeling that comes across as a result of the situation and what ensues. The diction choices she makes is absolute art; I see the imagery so clearly in my head, and not a single word of hers is wasted. It’s concise while being aptly and most beautifully descriptive. Even though I’m not a huge fan of Kaito, the way she writes him and his actions make me love him. I would describe the work as a futile yet desperate and exquisite struggling, an embodiment of angst that is so beautifully painful that it appears to be an illusion. I haven’t had a chance to check out other works from her just yet, but that’s on my to-do list!

2. @golden-redhead

I love, love, love their work too. They recently posted Lavender, a Kirumi x Kaede (Tojomatsu? Kaerumi? Kirumatsu?) work for femslash Feb, and it is a post-reality Virtual AU short fic. The way they write the interaction between Kirumi and Kaede offers such a delicate, carefully constructed image and story while creating some tension between the two. They also format the story with Kirumi’s thoughts in a simple and straightforward way that is just so delicious to read. Aspects of Kirumi explored are small things that unravel into a bigger statement about her character and the nature of the killing game and the impact it has left on her. It reminds me of the way a player might gently stack up a house of cards–attentively, with a sharp eye and feel. 

3. @starlightwritesalie

They wrote these two Oumota fics for the weekend that I fell in love with, especially the one for Day 1: Heroes/Villains. Sometimes when living in the world of Danganronpa, you forget that these tragic situations and the killing game are experienced, in essence, by children. You can argue that they’re older than high schoolers for the first two games, but mentally they are still high schoolers, and let’s face it–a couple years above the legal age of being an adult in America, 18, can hardly be counted as an adult, either. They reminded me of that sickening fact so poetically yet bluntly, and the story they write only serves as a further reminder of that fact. They write statements about the situation and how the pair act in the situation that are so agonizing yet irrefutable–as is the situation that they’re both trapped in. The ending is so unbearably cruel, packed with pain, but the way they create it is so decisively soft and snatches away my breath with the truth at the heart of the game, the situation. 

So there you have it! Sorry that my answers are so long... I have too much to say, and especially about the people whom I adore. Since it said to pick 3, I didn’t get to include these two, but I also love aroseandapen and mystic-mints dearly. If you ask, I’ll write a whole paragraph on why I love them, too, although I suspect by this time you all are getting rather tired of all my talking, haha. I also didn’t include imagines blogs, but if you’re curious, feel free to ask about that since I am still kind of a imagines blog! I guess at this point I’m kind of a fusion of an imagines blog and normal fanfiction writing blog.

Thanks for asking, and if you have any more questions, feel free to shoot an ask!

[littlebitoffanfic]

Pretty Little Thing

Fandom: Guardians of the Galaxy Characters: Kraglin Relationship: Kraglin/reader Request: Would you write something for Kraglin from gotg? Like he always brings you little things and its his birthday and you make him something and it leads to the reader confessing somehow but alittle angsty ? AN: I, personally, do a lot of crochet so this is what ive used 😊 Also, this kinda got away from me. You skipped through the halls of the ships, the gift grasped in your hands. You had joined the crew after Yondu hired you because of you hacking skills. You could go unnoticed by many as you silently hacked into their systems and stole their information, money and identity. It was a skill you had used only on your own, until you ran into Yondu at a bar. He said he needed information that only you could get and you agreed to take the job. That was over a year ago and you had never left. Yondu was as surprised as you were by how well you fit into the crew and how much the crew admired and respected you (after having to make an example of one who thought you couldn’t fight). One job lead to another lead to another and you couldnt see it ending any time soon. Not that you wanted it too. You loved it on the ship and you loved your new friends. There was one who stood out though. Right from the start, Kraglin had stolen your heart. He towered over you but never used that height to intimidate you. He often stood up for you and protected you where he could. Because you worked very closely with him and Yondu, the two of you were often up late together and had a very good bond. Something that was only cemented when he would bring you little bits and bobs back from missions. For the most part, you stayed out of missions unless you had to go. But every time, without fail, you would get a knock on your quarters door and he stand there with something held out in his hand. Some times it was a piece of jewellery, sometimes a new item of clothing or a scarf, sometimes a little knickknack. You’d blush but throw you arms around him and thank him. It was sweet. Something about him thinking about you enough to go out of his way to bring you something made your heart beat quickly in your chest. You stopped at his quarters, biting your lower lip as you reached out and knocked on the door. “Who is it?” you heard Kraglin call out, sounding a little exasperated to be bothered but you knew it wasn’t personal. You held the present behind your back. “[y/n].” You replied, giggling when you heard a large thud and you could imagine him scrambling to get to the door. “[y/n]! Whats wrong?” He pulled the door open to show he had discarded his large jacket and only wore a white teeshirt and trousers. “Does something have to be wrong for me to visit my favourite Ravenger on his birthday?” You ask, cocking your head to one side. Suddenly, a hand grabbed your free wrist and you were pulled inside as you giggled. None of the Ravengers really celebrated birthdays because the other often take to punching the living daylihts out of the person. “How did you know?” He hisses, sounding a little scared but not meaning anything mean by it. “Please, Kraglin. Its my job to know and find out everything.” You giggled, raising your eyebrow at him as you stepped closer and then extended the hand with the present in it. “Whats that?” He asked, staring at the present in confusion. “It’s a present!” You let out a laugh at how innocent he was. “For me?” “No, I thought id wave it in your face before giving it to Yondu.” You rolled your eyes, your voice dripping in sarcasm. “Of course for you!” You giggled. Kraglin slowly reached for the gift, seemingly unable to believe it was truly for him. He took the soft gift in his hand, admiring the wrapping and how nicely you had written his name on the tag. Not only that, but he noticed you’d signed it “love, [y/n]” which made his heart beat quickly in his chest. He took the small tag off and placed it carefully on the side, wanting to keep it for later. you were nearly bouncing on your toes as he ever so slowly and carefully opened the wrapping to show a dark red handmade scarf. He dropped the wrapping to the ground as he takes the soft scarf in both his hands. “I made it.” You smiled, stepping closer as Kraglin as he looked up at you, his eyes wide. “really?” He said in disbelief. “Yeah, I wanted to find something to thank you for everything you’ve done for me and for all the little gifts you get me. And I crochet in my spare time. So I thought id make you something.” You shrug, a little embarrassed you were admitting your hobby to him. You’d always thought that crochet and knitting was for old ladies and not the sort of hobby you wanted to boast about to the crew. “Thank you.” He smiles and he looks from you to the scarf and you could see a small ting of pink in his cheeks. you adored him. You truly did. It was so hard to put into words how much he brightened up your day, how much you enjoyed his company and how special you felt around him. He truly treated you like you were a queen, something no other man had ever done. A thought popped into your mind and you bit down on your lower lip. “Kraglin?” You almost whisper, drawing his attention to you. “Yeah?” he answered. You gently placed your hands under his and moved them down as you stepped closer. “Happy birthday.” You whispered as you leaned up and pressed you lips to his. Despite the roughness of his stubble, his lips were surprisingly soft, warm and oh so intoxicating. You felt him drop the scarf to the floor as his hands reached for you, gently grabbing your waist and pulling you closer as he kissed you with such passion it made you head spin. your hands reached to rest on his shoulders and you slowly kissed each other, your heart beating hard in your chest. But then he froze under your touch and you pulled back. “You should go.” He suddenly said, not looking at you as he pulled away and turned so his back was to you. “w-what?” you gasped, still breath-taken from that kiss. God, it made your head spin and your knees weak. “Go.” He said in a dejected voice as he kept away from you. “Kraglin.” You spoke in a soft tone despite how hard you heart was breaking. “I-im sorry for kissing you.” you reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, felling his muscles tense under your touch. Your eyes started to water and you blinked hard to supress the tears that started to slid down your cheek. “im sorry. I-“ you trailed off, unable to bring yourself to say anything else to him as you backed away from him. You’d ruined it. In a brash moment of love, you had ruined the friendship that had existed between you both. Turning on your heel, you fled from the room in tears. ---------------time skip ------------------------- You never saw Kraglin wear the scarf you made him. Even when they went to planets that were frozen or when the heating stopped working on the ship. Never. You always wore thing he brought you. That wasn’t the only thing that broke your heart. Since that night, he had distanced himself from you, barely talking to you unless it was essential. as you walked the fimiluar hallways, hating Yondu. He had told you to go tell Kraglin that he needed some of the items from the last raid checked for value and that Kraglin should look into it before tomorrow. Yondu insisted you go and tell him. But it was late and most the crew were in bed which meant Kraglin should be in his. You had to take deep breaths before you approached and knocked on his door, only to be met with silence. You knocked again and again until you gently called out his name, pushing the door open. You were surprised it was unlocked which meant he was either inside or just had to leave quickly. Stepping into the room, you scan over the furniture, bed and bathroom to see that he wasn’t there. You were about to leave, when your eyes spotted something red pocking out from the black bedding. Stepping closer, you pushed the pillow back to see the scarf you had made Kraglin was under his pillow along with the tag with your writing on it. Kraglin had many hiding places in the room, including a few lose floor board so why would he stuff your scarf and tag under his pillow. Before you could think of anything else, you heard footsteps outside, so you quickly replaced the pillow and darting to the middle of the room just as Kraglin rounded the corner, stopping in his tracks. “I was just looking for you.” he stated. “oh, me too!” you tried to sound happy, to sound like being in the room with him wasn’t killing you. “Why?” He asked, cocking his head to the side a little. “Yondu wanted you to look over some cargo from the last raid and see if theres anything else valuable before tomorrow.” You explained. “Why were you looking for me?” “I-I got you this.” He stuttered, holding out his palm to present you with a beautiful, sparkling bracelet. It was scrunched up in his palm slightly, but you could see the intricate details of the diamonds around the outside. you stepped closer, about to reach out and examine the bracelet when you caught yourself and stepped back. “I cant accept it.” You lowered your eyes, not daring to look at him. Never had you rejected a gift from him. “What? Why?” he asked, his voice filled with panic as he stepped closer to you. “Because, because I-“ You trailed off, unable to look at him. “It doesn’t feel right.” You finally finished. “No, it doesn’t.” he agreed, taking you complete by surprise. “what?” Your voice showed how hurt you were by his words. You assumed he meant what had happened between you two. “You should be kissin’ some duke or some shit. Not making out with a ravanger.” He shook his head, starting to turn away from you, stuffing the bracelet in his pocket. “Excuse me? Im a Ravenger!” You point out. “You really don’t think im part of the crew?” “Nah, nah you’re too pretty.” He shook his head again. “Ravengers don’t get pretty things.” As he spoke, you heard the pure sadness, loneliness and defeat in his voice as he fully turned away from you. “Kraglin-“ You placed your hands on his back, your voice breaking as you processed what he was saying. You leaned your head against his back, closing your eyes as you let a single tear fall from your eyes. You heart was breaking. Did he really feel this way about himself? “you should go.” His voice hit you like a cold wind. He didn’t even move, just stood there as if he had no energy left in him. “Please don’t do this again.” You mumbled, your voice cracking again, but this time, he knew it was from crying. “[y/n], you deserve better.” His voice cracked, making you jump a little. You had never heard him like this. “Kraglin. Stop it!” you tried to sound strong but sounded more like you were pleading or begging him. “is that why you’ve been pushing me away since I kissed you?” You opened your eyes but didn’t move from where you were. It felt a lot easier to not look at him right now. “I aint- I don’t- I-“ He stammered on, seemingly unable to find the right words. Closing your eyes once more, you took a long breath. “I cant help falling in love with you.” You finally confessed in little more than a whisper. You wondered if he even heard but then you felt his whole body tense and he stood bolt up right. You stepped back, opening your eyes so you could look up at him as he twisted around. “Yah-yah love me?” he stammered, his pale blue eyes wide. “Yeah.” Was all you could mumble, looking into his eyes as your heart beat hard in your chest. There was a tense moment where you couldn’t even breath as he stared at you. Then something inside him broke. He darted forward and grabbed your waist. You were pulled against his chest and his lips smashed against yours. Unlike before when the kiss was sweet and somewhat inexperienced, this time it was tense, passionate and heartfelt. you wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him close as you pressed your body against his. Your hands travel up the back of his neck, feeling him shudder slightly at the feeling, and into his hair. Or what little there was on the top of his head. In truth, you just didn’t want him to pull away again. This kiss, like before, was intoxicating and you didn’t know if you could cope with losing him again. Suddenly, you were lifted up. You gasped into the kiss but when you felt his arms securely around you, you wrapped your legs around his torso for support as he pushed you up against the wall. Your gasp broke the kiss but it seemed like Kraglin couldn’t get enough as he instantly moved to your neck, kissing the area. You moaned and tilted your head to the side, encouraging him to continue. “Pretty little thing like you lovin’ someone like me?” He mumbled against your skin and you felt him smile slightly. “I wont care if you were a god or a criminal, I’d still love you.” You breathed, loving how easy this felt. “Good thing. Cause we are criminals.” Kraglin pulled back to look in your eyes. You couldn’t help but laugh, pulling a hand back from him to cover your mouth. It felt so nice to just be with him. Even taking away the kiss and the position you were in, it was nice to have him speaking to you. Your laugher died and you leaned forward to kiss him sweetly. He smiled into the kiss and you could feel his heart was beating just as quickly as yours was in your chest. “I love yah.” His voice was low, nearly a whisper against your lips, making you freeze up. He felt the change and pulled back a little, looking at your eyes with fear. As if he thought you might have hated hearing those words fall from his lips. “Really?” You couldn’t help but ask as you felt a smile pulling at your lips. “’course. Since I first laid eyes on yah.” His lips twitched as a smile came to his lips. You threw yourself forward, feeling the same urge he must have felt when you confessed. You felt like you needed to kiss him more than you needed to breath. And he was more than happy to comply with your silent request. “Stay?” He whispered against your lips, only pulling back to rest his forehead against yours with his eyes closed. He cheeks started to glow a soft shade of blue, making you giggle. “I don’t think I could leave anyway.” You giggled, running your fingers across his cheek. He smiled and leaned back in for a kiss. his eyes snapped open and he pulled back suddenly, glancing at the bed. “Uh, do -do you need to go grab things from your room?” He stuttered, glancing over at his bed then back to you when he heard you giggling. “Why? So you can remove the scarf I made you from under your pillow?” You ask, raising your eyebrow at him slightly but unable to stop the soft giggles. “Ho-how’dya-“ he Sputtered. “I came in and the sleeve was sticking out. I thought id investigate.” You shrug, a little embarrassed at having to admit to finding it but not as embarrassed as he felt. “I thought I’d lost you. It was… it was from you.” Kraglin tried to explain but failed at making it sound any less creepy in his mind. But in yours, you adored the thought that he needed you close, even if it was only a small item from you. “Well, maybe you can put the scarf in your draw and I can replace it.” You lean forward, playful knocking his nose with yours. “You don’t have to make me another scarf.” He frowned a little, confused. “That’s not what I meant.” You winked, biting your lower lip to stop the chuckle escaping your lips as you watched the realisation dawn on him. “Ah.” Was all he said as his cheeks started to burn blue. You smiled, your heart jumping at the sight and you wanted nothing more that to see that colour dawn his cheeks more often. Maybe it happened during sex? You quickly shook the thought as your own cheeks light up red at the thought of Kraglin over you, his cheeks blue and his mouth open in pleasure. “oh! I forgot.” He jumped and placed you down the floor before reaching into his pocket and bringing out the bracelet. You couldn’t help but smile as he took each end in his hands and held it out to you. You raised your right hand and he wrapped it around your wrist, closing it. “I’ll have to get you more pretty things.” You mumbled, your left hand moving so you could run your fingers over the jewellery. “Nah, I get you pretty things, cause you’re my pretty thing.” Kraglin mumbled, leaning forward and kissing your forward. You couldn’t help but smile as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him down to your lips. “Why don’t you come back to mine with me? Save’s making two trips.” You ask, not wanting to separate from him for long. “As long as yer in my arms, I don’t care.” He chuckled as he wrapped an arm around you. His pretty little thing.

[leigh-kelly]

70: “This is why I fell in love with you.” NY verse pretty please!!

A continuation of this.

When they get back to school after spring break, Santana is glad that she feels more like herself again. She knows that signing up for the housing lottery with Brittany is a huge thing, but she’s just going with it, and trying not to let it eat her alive. She’s in love, she’s young, and she thinks that after a whole lifetime of avoiding making mistakes, she’s willing to try, even if it could end up being disastrous. 

With spring break behind her, Santana begins to prep for finals. She’s already studying like crazy with Brittany, trying to make sure she passes her world religions final, and on top of that, she has stacks of books on her desk, figuring out her research papers, and trying to avoid going completely crazy at the thought of writing upwards of fifty pages in the last weeks of the semester. 

On top of all of that, Santana reads on Tumblr that there’s going to be a lesbian fan convention in New York. Being in Ohio, and being...mostly antisocial, she never actually thought that she’d want to go to something like that. But now that she’s in New York, the idea kind of thrills her, and she wonders if she can muster up the courage to go. Even more than that, she wonders if should could ever possibly convince Brittany to go with her. She’s not really into the whole multishipping thing that a lot of the other girls are into, but she knows that some of the people who read her Rizzoli and Isles lesbian subtext blog are going to be there, and really, if she’s being honest with herself, she wants to go.

“Hey babes.” Brittany meets her after class one afternoon, and Santana still kind of can’t get used to her calling her by that pet name. It’s not babe, or baby, it feels...special, and she loves it. “How was hell?”

“Not so bad.” Santana laughs, glad that Brittany knows how much she hates her Twentieth Century American Lit class that’s basically all men, all the time. “But I swear, all this guy wants to do is talk about Hemingway. One day, I’m going to raise my hand and just start listing off American women writers...”

“You should, it would probably knock the guy’s socks off.”

“I’m not sure if it would be in a good way or a bad way though...and I still need his grade.”

“Please, like you’re not totally going to ace it.”

“Not chancing it. How was your class, anyway.”

“Super mathy. So, good.”

“Good.” Santana smiles. “So, uh, I wanted to ask you something kind of weird.”

“Okay...” Brittany trails off, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, to the frustration of everyone walking behind them. 

“It’s not serious.” Santana tugs at her hand, making her walk again. “There’s just like...this kind of lame, like, lesbian thingy this weekend. A, um, fandom convention I guess.”

“Cool! Do we get to dress up?”

“Wait, seriously? You’re reacting that positive without me even telling you what it’s about?”

“Well you obviously want to go. I mean, maybe you want to go alone, and if so, live it up! But if you wanted me to go with you, I’d be totally down. Isles is the blonde one, right?”

“Yeah...um, wow, okay, I totally didn’t expect you to react so enthusiastically. But yeah, I’d really like if you came with me. I’m kind of freaked by the whole idea of even going to something like this, so, I think I’d feel better if you were there.”

“Please, these are your people.” Brittany grins. “You’ll probably be famous there, or something. Think anyone’ll recognize me from your Tumblr?”

“I mean, if anyone there actually reads my blog, of course they will. I post about you more often now than I post about the girls.”

“A great honor, of course. I love that you want to go. I mean, this is why I fell in love with you. You’re like, this awesome nerd, and I’m obsessed with it.”

“Jeeze, I still don’t know how I got lucky enough to find you.”

“The magic that is Washington Square Park. And obviously I’m luckier. But important question, do I get to carry a fake gun to get the bad guys with?”

“Maura’s a medical examiner, Britt. Sorry, but you don’t get a gun.”

“Do you?”

“Obviously.”

“Well, then that’s probably the sexiest thing I’ll ever see.”

For the rest of the week, Santana doubles down to get her work done before the weekend. On Saturday morning, Brittany goes back to her room to get dressed, and Santana puts her Boston Police Department shirt on under her blazer, and straps her gun belt to her waist. She’s never done cosplay before, but the idea of doing it with Brittany for something like this has has all kind of excited. When Brittany comes back in a red dress with a lab coat over it, Santana smiles so wide. It’s not just about how hot she looks, but about the fact that she’s really getting into this with her. The whole thing means more than she can even say, and she kisses her, careful not to smear her red lipstick.

They go uptown to the venue where the event is being held, and Santana kind of just takes it all in. It’s a lot, being around so many other people, and even if they’re her people, like Brittany said, she’s shy. It’s one thing being really into something on the internet, but it’s another to be into it in person. She’s a little embarrassed, and a little trepidatious, but she holds fast to Brittany’s hand, and Brittany urges her to talk to people. This is her thing, after all, and she knows that Brittany just wants to have a good time. 

Brittany flags someone down to snap a picture of the two of them together, and immediately after Santana posts it on her blog—hashtag best girlfriend ever—she gets a whole flood of responses. As it turns out, people have actually started shipping her and Brittany together after Santana’s incessant posting about her, and the idea that they’re dressed up as Maura and Jane has her followers a buzz. It’s really sweet, and Santana just hopes Brittany knows what this means to her.

They spend the day there, and Santana meets some of the girls who have been following her since she was fourteen years old and writing really, really bad fan fiction—including the ones who survived that high school cheerleading captain AU—and she introduces Brittany to all of them. Maybe it’s lame, but she kind of feels like a mini celebrity, and when they finally leave to go back to their dorm, it’s almost a let down. It’s hard for Santana to be who she is in the real world, and this was an opportunity for that. It was amazing, and she honestly can’t thank Brittany enough for being part of it with her.

“I know you were probably bored to tears today, Britt, but...it meant so much to me that you came.”

“I wasn’t bored at all, babes. I know I’m like, super clueless about what actually happens on that show, but I also know it helped you when you were struggling, and I think it’s really cool you got to do something like that.”

“It was awesome. I mean, I couldn’t have cared less about anything else that went on there, but the Rizzles stuff was neat, and I liked that I got to meet all those people who only existed behind Tumblr usernames.”

“Yeah, I cant imagine what that felt like. I mean, I can barely even turn on a computer, let alone make a whole bunch of friends on there. But it’s like, this whole cool world, and you’re a part of it.”

“I don’t even understand how you can be so amazing.” Santana rests her head on Brittany’s shoulder as they walk down Fifth Avenue. “I figured if I ever met anyone who actually wanted to be with me, I’d keep this part of me a complete secret, but here you are, dressed as Maura Isles.”

“What can I say? I’m kind of an amazing girlfriend.”

“Tell me, Britt, is there any weird kind of stuff like this that you would want to do? Any secret life I don’t know about?”

“I don’t think so.” Brittany shakes her head. “The only thing I really want to go is see a show at the New York City Ballet. I’ve dreamed of it...pretty much my entire life.”

“Wait, you haven’t gone yet? I sort of just figured it would have been the first thing you did when you got here.”

“I was so stressed out when I first got here, trying to like, cope with being away from home, dealing with learning to eat new food, and not fail my classes. It just sort of slipped my mind. But seeing you so happy doing something you couldn’t do back in Ohio reminded me of how much I wanted to do that.”

“Can I take you for your birthday?”

“That’s too expensive, Santana. I can’t let you do that.”

“I have Christmas money saved up from my parents.” Santana protests. “I’ve been trying to figure out what I could even get you for your birthday, and I’ve been at a total loss. Let me do that for you. I’d surprise you, but I don’t want to like, buy tickets and then have you make some other big plans that day.”“Do you really think I’m making big birthday plans that don’t include you?”“I don’t know, don’t you want to go to a bar or something?”

“Why would I want to go to a bar when you don’t have a fake ID, and have no desire to go?”

“I don’t know, because it’s not my birthday? If you wanted to do that, I’d go to that guy you know on Canal Street and get one, you know.”

“That’s really sweet, Santana, but I’m not trying to corrupt you. You like to play by the rules, and what am I going to do at a bar that I couldn’t do with you somewhere else?”

“Drink? Dance?”

“Okay, fair.” Brittany concedes. “But I’d much rather do anything else if it meant you were having a good time too.”

“I guess. I just want your birthday to be special.”

“If you’re serious about the ballet thing, that would make it really special. If not, I’m also totally fond of eating sushi in my underwear and watching Imagine Me and You.”

“That’s pretty much our every Saturday night.” Santana shakes her head laughing. “As long as you’ll let me, I’m going to make your birthday special.”

“Then guess what? It’s in your hands now.”

[robertdowneyjjr]

nursey the tech disaster and dex the apple support guy: an au

a conversation between me & @brandnewfashion

(interspersed with random hockey commentary)

kayytx

au where nursey keeps having IT trouble and every time he goes online to use that quick chat help service (bc he doesn't want to call. that's awkward af) he gets dex as the service guy

brandnewfashion

oooooh

nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL ME MOER

kayytx

i'm trying to decide what products nursey's using that he keeps having issues lmao

i feel like fandom consensus states nursey is a mac guy?

brandnewfashion

yeah i can't see him not using them

kayytx

so basing off of my experience trying to update my software for FOUR HOURS at staying up until 3am bc of that shit ugh

the first time he has to contact apple support online he's trying to upgrade his OSX to the latest software, but it keeps stalling a quarter of the way through

so nursey borrows chowder's laptop to go on apple's website for support help and dex answers

and legit, that shit takes...four hours

brandnewfashion

lol i wouldn't know

sounds annoying tho

kayytx

it's supposed to be only half an hour but my laptop just decided to be a little shit

but anyway

in between dex telling nursey what to do, and nursey following instructions and waiting for his laptop to show some progress

they start chatting

bc nursey is bored and it's late at night and there's nothing else for him to do, especially since his computer isn't working

imagine nursey like, suddenly thinks of a few verses for a poem and types them in the chat bc he couldn't find anywhere else to write atm

and dex is like ??????

brandnewfashion

yesss

kayytx

YASSS HABS WIN

ok anyway

brandnewfashion

GOOD

kayytx

so that obvi leads to a convo where dex asks what nursey does and nursey talks about being an english major

and dex tells him about doing comp sci and working for apple part time

brandnewfashion

FINALLY THE FLAMES SCORED

and yes good i'm liking this au

kayytx

idk how many call locations there are in the US though so i'm trying to figure out where dex is based rn

like i'm kinda tempted to have him live in nyc

but i don't work for apple so idk how true this is

brandnewfashion

dude that'd be cool though? and nursey could be like "YO I'M FROM THERE" and dex, who just started school there, could be like "ok is there any place to get decent ____ bc i haven't found one yet"

kayytx

yeS EXACTLY

so nursey recommends some like hipster coffee places and one day dex remembers this convo and goes and at first he's like, what the FUCK this place serves out of mason jars NO

but he tries the coffee and he honestly thinks it's liquid cocaine so he keeps going back

brandnewfashion

lolllll

kayytx

anyway so like after three hours of chitchat and apple support nursey's computer finally boots properly and installs the update

so they say goodbye, it's been really fun talking to you, thanks for the help, etc. etc. and sign off

then three weeks later nursey's iphone spazzes out

and the nearest apple store is an hour away and he just doesn't have the time to go there, wait another hour for the genius bar to have an opening, and then go back to campus

so he goes online to apple support and clicks the chat option

and it's dex again

dex recognizes him from his apple ID, which usually never happens but bc they had such a good convo last time nursey left an impression

and so again in between helping out nursey he's just like, oh HEY i went to that place you told me about!

so nursey tells him about more places to visit

brandnewfashion

ok ben bishop is in net for the kings (no surprise) but he's wearing his lightning mask and it's really throwing me off

kayytx

god that's so weird

brandnewfashion

ANYWAY

what places does nursey tell him to go toooooo

how long does tihs go on before they get the opportunity to meet?????

kayytx

OKAY OK so

idk i think this happens like four or five times?

apple products arent THAT terrible lmao you can't have that many issues with your products

but nursey's a disaster so

he manages to fuck up something every few weeks

and like after the third time he enters the chat dex's coworkers recognize him also and they just pass him off to dex immediately hahaha

brandnewfashion

lmaooo

kayytx

oh FUCK stars tied the game

anyway

brandnewfashion

RUDE

kayytx

honestly after the fourth time nursey goes online with an issue about his ipad's storage issue or whatever dex is just really tempted to give nursey his number bc for the most part he's been able to solve his problems without referring to the resources at his desk

OH SHIT STARS IN THE LEAD

brandnewfashion

EXCUSE ME WHAT

FUCK U STARS

kayytx

UGH

anyway so yeah dex wants to give nursey his number and nursey wants to ask for it, but they both know the chats are monitored and that's just highly inappropriate and nursey doesn't want to get dex fired

so they both resist but like

it's kinda killing both of them

brandnewfashion

D:

kayytx

yeah like they're both p sure they're gonna die before they ever meet bc they're Dramatic af

BUT!! THIS IS FIC!!! and i love them and want them to be together so DO NOT DESPAIR

nursey goes back to nyc for winter break

and he doesn't want to be all cooped up at home with nothing to do

so he decides to go out, find some inspo, write a bit

AND THEN this suddenly becomes a coffee shop au

nursey goes to that mason jar hipster cafe to get some work done

but in the middle of writing his computer shuts down and he panics REALLY LOUDLY

and what??? dex is THERE???

brandnewfashion

LOL

AMAZING

HOW CONVENIENT

kayytx

R I G H T

he had the day off and was also there to work on some freelance coding projects he has on the side and in the middle of coding he hears this really loud person screaming at his laptop and he's like, what the FUCK

so he looks up and sees nursey doing SOMETHING with his computer. he's not even sure what

and in teh cafe there are like three other people with their laptops out, but dex is the closest and he looks the least busy (nursey is wrong. dex is the busiest, he just looked up at the wrong time and Eye Contact happened and now he's stuck)

so nursey goes over to him and he's like, "yo bro can i borrow your laptop to go on apple support and get some help"

bc that response is just like ingrained in him now. anytime something happens he just. goes on apple support

dex, being the lil shit he is, just goes, "have u tried turning ur computer off and on again"

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

nursey: it won't even turn ON dex: maybe its out of battery nursey: it's plugged in??? do u not see it????? dex: maybe your cord doesn't work

dex just. doesn't want to help

he does enough of that at work

brandnewfashion

lollll

kayytx

but nursey is really annoying and he figures the easiest way to get rid of him is to help him so he's like, ok fine i actually work at apple i'll help you

brandnewfashion

wow

the pens are gonna lose

to the STARS

kayytx

.....that's so depressing

brandnewfashion

they got too fucking cocky

ugh

kayytx

D:

brandnewfashion

anyway

dex helps him?

kayytx

dex helps him!

and meanwhile nursey's chattering on and on about how this is the first time someone's actually physically helped him with his laptop bc he never goes to the genius bar even though he probably should and he's terrible with technology and things always just die on him so he always has to get help from online support and it's kinda funny how he always gets the same guy who helps with his problems and it's actually kinda nice talking to him, and he kinda really likes him, but he doesn't think they'll ever meet bc why would that ever happen right? hey maybe dex would know him since they're both working for apple? but what are the chances?? surely there are thousands of people who work for apple

and like all this time dex has sorta just been tuning him out while he works on nursey's computer but he catches a few things here and there

and he's like

wait

rewind

dex: holy shit nursey: what? what is it, is my computer really dead this time? dex: you're derek nurse nursey: umm? yes?

and for a sec nursey thinks that he's just somehow become notorious within apple support center circles or something bc he's gone for help so many times

but then dex introduces himself and he's like OH HOLY SHIT

brandnewfashion

NICE

kayytx

and like sometime during nursey's little ramble he mentioned how he thought dex is funny and really nice and seems like someone he'd like to date and of COURSE dex totally heard all of that

dex: so. you think i'm funny. and you want to date me huh? nursey: ...well i mean maybe? dex: okay well just do you know just because we're both in a coffee shop right now declaring our feelings this ISN'T our first date okay bc i refuse to have our first date be one where i fix something for you again nursey: oh so YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME TOO?

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

dex: well yeah. i wanted to give you my number but i couldn't do that without a monitored chatroom nursey: i wanted to give you my number too! dex: well? technically? i have your number? because it's in our systems dex: but i didn't want to seem like a creep if i'd just randomly texted you

but anyway they finally exchange numbers like normal people and nursey Officially asks dex out on a date

but then internally he's struggling bc he basically already gave dex a list of all the best places in nyc and now he has nothing to impress dex with lmfao

brandnewfashion

HAHAHAHA

kayytx

they end up going to brooklyn for smorgasburg bc you cant really ever go wrong with that

wait jk that's seasonal so it wouldn't be open for winter break LMAO

brandnewfashion

oh gosh they're gonna become a disgustingly sweet long distance couple

kayytx

yeah nursey's fucked

YES THEY ARE

they're so gross honestly

brandnewfashion

they always have shit going on

there's ALWAYS something hapening haha

kayytx

and dex's coworkers notice that this dude hasn't been on the chat in a really long time??? and they kinda start feeling bad for dex bc they knew he had a bit of a crush on nursey lmao

brandnewfashion

ok but then dex has them all over to meet his "new boyfriend" and they all walk in on nursey screaming at his laptop and they're like "OH"

kayytx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and at this point dex is already at the fondly exasperated stage and he's like, jfc nurse you should just give up on technology altogether

[lawlightfan42069]

1)this fandom turned to be disturbing yall only care about shinee sexual orientation and gender when its not of anyone's business. you spend all ur time on fighting over their personal matters instead of enjoying their music and what they give us. both sides acting like what they say is confirmed facts nd when one of shinee say random names or look at someone you act like they want to have sex with them nd yall act that the only attraction is sexual or romantic

2)the side that gets angry of the possibility that shinee are queer is homophobic nd not all idols has to be cis. the side that gets angry at the possibility that shinee might be like girls is weird coz we don't know these idols in real life no matter what they say or share with us

3) as an pan-aro nd part of lgbt its lowkey skeevy for me that shawols are painting shinee as lgbt icons when they only did basic decent things but in no way they r lgbt icons. yall literally could be calling a hetero guys an lgbt icons. I get wanting to connect more with them nd wanting representation but its not like this. actual lgbt people get killed nd a lots of lgbt people are fighting for our rights with little support bc we r looking in representation somewhere else we r not sure about

4) and please don't start with the closet talk bc I know how dangerous for an idol to come out but the idols u think they r queer might not be queer in the first place and if they were we have no right to want to them out too, at the end we don't know their sexualities. what am I saying is both opinions should be treated as headcanons not as confirmed facts nd this whole issue shouldn't have got that big. also neurodivergent idols headcanons should be respected too

tbh i dont even know what ur..trying 2 say by this?? i dont understand how youre like Yeah, Headcanons! but when ppl talk about headcanons ur like no...i didnt mean it like that... i mean it honestly baffles me how you reconcile these two things. if u respect ppls abilities to have headcanons youve also got to accept ppls ability to Talk about them as headcanons?? getting in discussions w ppl who say every idol Must be straight or cis isnt fighting w someone over shinees orientations Specifically, its fighting against the bigotry involved in this line of thinking. arguing w ppl who say “___ Msut be cishet” is not saying “_____ must not be cishet” its saying to question what motivates ppl to say the first thing. its not really About shinee exclusively bc its applicable to every single idol, and tbh every single person. its a discussion larger than any one particular person. i think this is an aspect that a lot of ppl miss.  

also i truly dont know when ive ever acted like attraction can only be sexual or romantic bc i rly have not. talking about how queer idols Exist is not demanding idols be out. its acknowledging a reality that is hardly ever acknowledged. like. ignoring queerphobia is Not whats going to make it easier for idols to come out, discussing how queerphobia manifests in the idol industry is what will. 

it really tires me when ppl pull out the U Spend All Ur Time Doing This, we’re all here for the music!! enough of that!! because while thats true, we all did become connected through shinee through music, a part of being an Active participant in fandom for many ppl is also like...talking about stuff besides their music. we’re here for their music but the Reason ppl blog about them and do shit like make gifs or edits or fics or what have u is bc they also care about the members themselves. their music is a given. i also like mamamoos music a whole ton, but i dont have a blog dedicated 2 mamamoo bc i am not As invested in the band members as i am in shinee. which isnt to say that every stan has to get involved w this specific discourse or even discourse in general, just that stans often Do get involved w non-musicy things in the process of stanning.

why is it that only queer headcanons are policed to this level...why is it only queer headcanons are met w Listen To Their Music Instead ! instead of the numerous other things ppl involved in fandom do that dont directly relate to their music. why dont u tell gif makers that theyre Too Obssesed w shinees faces and to go listen to their music instead. ppl do shit like “boyfriend imagines” for shinee which are 1000% unrelated to their music and tbh effectively function as Headcanons except youll never see ppl respond to that with Go Listen To Their Music Instead! while its not always (although it. often is lmfao) explicitly said, a lot of bf imagines are implicitly cishet and i feel like this is undoubtedly why those are accepted w/o word. bc ppl find being cishet ‘more polite’ and ‘less intrusive.’ when u make being queer a taboo to talk about (whilst simultaneously accepting anyone that talks about being cishet) u are basically saying that it is more acceptable to be cishet, while being queer is something that ought to be kept private. if ur truly adamant that this is about not spending enough time enjoying shinees music, then id like 2 see u come at every single other thing in fandom that has nothing to do w music. every time you see someone say “hey jonghyun would make a great bf” remind that person they shldnt care about something like that and shld instead be supporting shinees music. in any case, you ought to examine what makes u think that someone being queer is taboo to speak of while not rallying against statements like ‘he would be a great bf 2 his girlfriend.’

anyway i agree that ultimately what people are doing is making. headcanons. ive always agreed w this fact? this is a thing i continually say?? its why im not out there to Objectively Prove that jonghyun is gay or bi or whatever. the reason people respond to statements like ‘no jonghyun is not gay hes a straightie hetero’ with ‘no ur wrong’ bc the first statement is one that is Constantly enforced by society and it just functions as a way 2 shut down queer voices and reassert the heterosexual default present Everywhere. society treats straight as the absolute default. this is why straight “Headcanons” arent treated as well lmao... headcanons. theres rly no reason for anyone out there 2 headcanon something as straight?? when its the Assumed Sexuality in every situation?? tbh the only reason ppl are interested in doing that is Denying that idols might not be straight. doing this when ppl are Forced 2 be straight is gross. theres a difference between queer ppl saying Hey, remember not all idols are straight so lets talk about that and straight ppl being all No! ur wrong! he cant be anything but straight so shut up! these two things are coming from different perspectives. 

like. imagine a pie being sliced up. historically, a 100% of this pie has been given to straight people. when queer ppl speak up, theyre trying to take some of their fair share of this pie. saying Hey, queer ppl exist!! is trying to section urself out a piece of the pie when youve been given none. someone saying Nope!! theyre all definitely straight is stealing back the measly slices someone has Actively Fought to obtain and attempting to perpetuate this imbalance. 

im not rly here for ppl painting shinee as lgbt icons. ive expressed how annoying i find statements like ‘king of the gays’ or whatever to be. but also just. saying that anyone in shinee might be lgbtq is not painting them as an lgbtq icon?? its just stating a fact?? esp since a lot of the King of The Gays ! stuff seems to come from ppl who position him as a Amazing Cishet Ally so. idek buddy i feel like youve got to further think through some of your positions bc some seem to be in direct conflict with others. 

[illyriantremors]

1/3 okkkkayyy. unpopular opinion here but... am i the only one that really dislikes the nesta x cassian thing? i enjoy reading cassian individually, however as a couple and/or just nesta.... i dont like it. i also don't think it's necessarily "healthy", if that makes sense. i mean the way they seem now, they'll constantly be bickering, hating/loving each other simultaneously, and when they DO fight for real, imagine how HEATED that would get. now im not talking sexy heated

2/3 like they'll grab each other and kiss, but im talking about... lets say they argue.  arguing consists of YELLING and INSULTING (generally speaking) and yet they do that all the time ?? so for them, when they're angry.... imagine how much worse/how volatile it could get ?? like if nesta says something rude, cassian thinks "BITCH" in the side story, yet imagine if they were fighting and.... yeah, HEATED. id be afraid nesta would throw something at him/hit him to be HEARD because she might feel

3/3 intimidated by how big/muscular/strong he is. but... uhm, that's abuse. regardless of if its a dude or a chick who hits somebody.... its abuse. and like i said before, they {would} bicker a shit ton. like... insulting each other regularly? verbal abuse, possibly. and no, im not throwing the word "abuse" freely. cause THAT IS WHAT IT IS. u cant disregard a FACT just because "oh that ship is just sooo SEXY. and has sooo much potential!!!😍😍" idk it just seems unhealthy for both parties involv

Hello! I feel like I am maybe not the best person to answer this, but I’ll try. Apologies if it gets incoherent or seems rambling and weird!

Your initial question - are you the only person who dislikes Nessian. The answer is no. There are definitely people who aren’t into Nessian. I used to be one of them! I’ve put a lot of effort into understanding Nesta more since summer and have really come around to the ship because of my studies (for lack of a better word), but there are still certainly people who don’t ship Nessian... or Moriel! Or Elucien! This fandom has all sorts of ships going on right now and whatever you decide to ship is a-okay, so don’t feel weird if you end up in the minority on a ship opinion. It happens all the time and it’s okay. Ship and let ship! :)

The later half of your question is trickier. I understand where you could see the potential for a ship like Nessian to become unhealthy and problematic. They certainly have a heated way of dealing with each other that is both physical and mental/emotional. However, I don’t think there is anything in the text right now that implies that either of them would become abusive or unhealthy.

Cassian, for his part, is incredibly mature and responsible and we see in the bonus chapter just by how he reacts to Nesta’s almost rape that he would never harm a woman. That fact alone coupled with how ardently he fights to give the female Illyrians equal rights in the war camps tells me that Cassian would never hurt a woman even if his life depended on it. Quite the opposite, actually. I think he’d go to the ends of the earth to avoid it. This is the man who pukes his guts up after slaughtering his enemies. He has a gift for fighting, but I don’t think that means he enjoys the violence or relishes hurting people. He has a big heart and I think at the end of the day, Cass would give up his gifts for fighting if it meant everyone could be happy and safe and loved.

Nesta I think it a lot more vulnerable than you may give her credit for? Certainly she lashes out and is harsh. That’s an integral part of her character. But she is human and she is certainly not cruel as I know I initially pegged her for. I think the portions of the bonus chapter from her POV show that she struggles a lot with being vulnerable and that her aim is to push people away, not to hurt them to give her some kind of control or power like an abuser would seek. This vulnerability is a huge challenge for her, but if she were to truly fall in love with Cassian, I think a lot of the harshness would soften in her. She would still be her good ole prickly self and trade jabs with him for sure, but when you’re in love, you’re a lot less inclined to deal out serious injuries (verbal or physical) towards your SO, especially ones that would lead to something unhealthy and abusive as you’re suggesting. And I just don’t personally even out of love with Cass that Nesta’s sharpness is anything lending to abuse to begin with. She loves and she loves deeply, it’s just hard to see.

So overall, I just don’t think either of them are motivated to lash out for abusive reasons - to gain power over the other and diminish them. I think they’re both just trying to figure out how they might fit together (and for Nesta, how she fits in the world period), so they sting with words to put space between them, but not to begin a vicious cycle of abuse or to be unhealthy. And the more they grow to understand and love one another, the more I think that the stings will become the sexy kind of fighting that we all enjoy reading as opposed to something dangerous or volatile.

I also think it’s important to note that all couples fight. There is always yelling and insults are traded. It’s not nice and it’s not good, but just because it happens doesn’t mean that couple has landed in an abusive relationship. Feyre threw a shoe at Rhys and outright hated him in the beginning, but that didn’t make their relationship abusive. I could see something similar for Nessian happening. There will be times that they fight and the words exchanged will be real and meant to wound - not the sexy hot stuff - but not because they want to forever harm or abuse. It’s just a part of working through what being together means. Again, it’s just my view that the more you love someone truly, the less likely you’ll be to want to hurt them on an abusive level even if you’re in the middle of a really intense fight.

If it ever did go too far, well then yeah, obviously it’s not meant to work out and I wouldn’t support it. I just don’t personally think that’s the direction it’s going nor do I believe SJM is going to go there. If you’re still feeling frustrated or concerned, and you’re asking because you’re trying to find reasons to enjoy Nessian more, I’d say maybe go back and reread their bits with a Nesta/Nessian lens on and try to understand where they each are coming from in their choices and words? If you’re still not feeling it after that, remember what I said in the first paragraph: it’s okay! You can ship whomever you like or not ship it and the world will keep on turning.

I hope this helps! I always feel weird answering these kind of more serious asks, so I hope this made sense?? If anyone has more to add, feel free! I know there are several of you out there who are much more eloquent at abuse and/or Nessian meta than I!

xx