#i cant be bothered with people being douchebags about something so stupid

[nightglider124]

titans fans think they own the dickkory tag but seem to forget that in no way did they invent it. Dickkory has been the ship name for decades for the two characters for the comics. It so happens that other versions of the ship (like titans) have tacked onto dickkory tag to make it easier to enjoy content. Robstar is used solely for the 03 cartoon. I don’t mean to hate, i like titans as well but it comes off as belittling other media forms to prop up others. Ie putting down the cartoon for the show even though they are completely different but still star our favourite dc characters and the reverse as well. I dont get why fans fee the need to be negative like cartoon fans hating on titans - they are completely different but they are both still valid. Just cos you don’t like one of the versions, doesn’t mean they need to be dicks about it. Sorry to vent, night but I see the bullshit on twitter and now here too. Its so stupid.

Sigh. In a way, I feel this, anon. I get what you mean with the end part of that - it is stupid. Titans, 03 show, ttg, dcau, comics… at the end of the day, i stay out of that bs drama with what is better or whatever cos that is childish af.

I very clearly have a favourite version which has always been the cartoon. Its what got me into DC and i grew up with it when fics and fanart were going strong and it was back in the early 2000’s, you know. The good ol’ days. 😂 But, despite that being my favourite, I also really enjoy Titans cos its a gritty version that is aimed at an older audience. I think that is what a lot of fans who prefer comics or the cartoon etc struggle with. I think they lean towards flat out disliking it bc it isn’t what they know and it’s different. There’s nothing wrong with not liking Titans. It isn’t everyone’s cup of tea; hell, i dropped it for s3 bc i was so uninterested in what they were doing by the end of s2. I also did not care for all the side characters taking spotlight over the main ones but I digress. But, keep it out of the fan’s faces, you know?

Its rude and really annoying when you have fans shitting on your good time. Titans has had a good time so far with dickkory and so fans are allowed to enjoy that. The fact that other dickkory fans who dont like Titans are being dicks about it is weird, in my opinion.

Same as, i think fans who try and shit on fans who love the cartoon are lame af. Like so what if its old? So what if it was aimed at younger audiences? So what if you dont like it? Point is, other people do so leave them to enjoy it. My biggest gripe with the cartoon is people saying it was childish considering it actually tackled some deeper topics, despite being a kids show.

Main point here is, people who gatekeep tags and shit are losers. Like, no one owns anything and anyone acting like that is sus, imo.

I get so sick of seeing people fight over different versions of a ship considering at the end of the day, its all the same?? Like dickkory for example. You may not like them in one format but you do in another. Personally, i am so fucking starved for dickkory content, i will take it from anything. Any version is allowed to be in the tag, old or new like jeez.

They are all valid formats if it means i get to see my two idiots in love.

A lot of people hate the DCAU but i really enjoyed those animated movies cos of, you guessed it, dickkory. They showed their relationship so nicely in that. It was wholesome as fuck but was also a little flirty so it was aimed at the adults more so. I think some people see animated stuff and immediately think its shit and childish which literally isn’t the case at all.

The comics are the og sources for these characters and I’ve seen a lot of ‘comic gatekeepers’ moan about other forms of the characters as well through the years. Now, i’ve got knowledge of the comics but im not some purist who has read every single one, more so bc fuck, I can’t keep up and comics contradict all the time cos of dumbass writers (looking at you T*m T*aylor 👀) but, i still appreciate the comics being the thing that started it all off. Without the comics, I wouldn’t have my baby Koriand’r 🥰 so anytime something remotely to do with dickkory comes out in comics, im rooting for it, purely cos i like seeing some form of life for my ship.

TTG is also valid; its silly and fun and that’s okay too. The titans are like a chiller version of the justice league and they are a team that notoriously is a bit less serious in all formats; they still have very serious storylines but they are the younger team ya know? Again, i think thats why a lot of people don’t like TTG either which is FINE but dont be going into ttg tags and mouthing off about how shit you think it is. Like its bad fandom decorum. Personally, I don’t care much for ttg; i did at first. I liked it and watched it regularly but now i just dont. But again, im not out here bitching about how it isnt the og cartoon so its crap or it isnt titans so its stupid.

I didn’t mean to rant like this but I just find it so fucking ridiculous that we’re still at this point in fandom where people can’t just let others enjoy shit. It is pathetic especially when shit like this comes from people who are literally adults like come on ffs. Get a grip.

I will continue to stay in my dickkory bubble, enjoying it in all forms which I advise fans to do lmao, it’s much less annoying and bitter when you just let yourself enjoy your ship In whatever formats there are.

Need I remind people that dickkory, despite being hella popular and loved, hasn’t had anything substantially canon in a long time so if shows like Titans are feeding fans, don’t be a dick and rain on parades. It’s not fair when people just wanna enjoy it and it just makes you an ass.

Sorry, this got hella long lmao. Also, anon, i would avoid twitter. It’s too toxic there, i have found in the past. Though Tumblr has had its moments too and by the sounds of it, people be just as bad here. 🙄

I could literally write a book on this, that’s how many thoughts I have. I’ve been around the DC fandom and dickkory tags for a long time and I can’t believe people still can’t help themselves. Just let people enjoy things all round, ugh! 🤦🏻‍♀️

[monotype-on-phantom]

i didnt want to say this before but man.. Danny kind of.. sucks, at least in the heart of canon. i get that he's young and learns "Those Valuable Lessons" and but people dont acknowledge most of this douchebag's shitty antics cause he's a cute boy or whatever. although Danny has a very excellent premise for a character, he is sincere sometimes, but overall its not executed well. he falls into too many awful high school tropes

i guess im glad people are making use of his character premise by reading too closely than the show intended, or by making content of their own interpretations. but we cant ignore that he is quite a goddamned piece of hell shit who i fucking hate in the real show sometimes. i feel there’s just too much emphasis on a character and show that wasn’t well crafted and well managed to begin with. its kinda sad when all the hate is somehow directed towards other characters like Sam.

it feels like most people are praising him and the overall show for what they imagine it to be instead of what it actually is. srsly this awful goddamned fuckboy sells stuff garage lab items he aint supposed to just to buy some fucking clothes??? uses ghost powers to spy girls in their locker room?? he fuckin destroys ghost writer’s writing and then doesnt feel sorry about it just cause it’s christmas-related and he’s so pissy about it.

so.. yeah. i dont get why people think he’s literal kid Jesus and always wants to protect this little fucker. he puts himself in alot of mess. the “D” on his suit stands for “dick”, bc that’s what he is.  i want to beat him up sometimes

Okay.

Normally, I delete all character hate on sight, because the point of my blog is to focus on the show’s strengths and how the weaknesses could’ve been done better. I get critical sometimes, but I like focusing on a characters’ strengths rather than their poor writing and garbage like that.

This was so long, detailed, and harsh that it’s really hard to ignore. Maybe I should. Stick to my guns and not let some anonymous rant change how I work. You came to me, though, so if you want to debate this, then alright. I’ll bite.

First off, who in the fandom is portraying Danny as a kid Jesus? Maybe it’s just the circles I’m familiar with, but one of the most reblogged posts that pops up in my notifications is one with a ton of additions arguing why Danny totally deserves to suffer. The majority of the fandom loves tormenting this kid. Even those that do say he needs to be protected never claim he has no flaws. Far from it. They just acknowledge he has it hard for a kid and he deserves a break sometimes.

Second, have you ever…met a 14 year old? As someone who spent most of his career life working with kids and who is the oldest of 5 (with one brother who’s turning 14 this November), lemme tell you that the main trio are saints for their age.

People talk about the terrible twos, but 14 year olds are so much worse. I’m not slamming them, because it makes sense. They’re in a tough transition period between childhood and adulthood. Adults tell them to act more mature, but refuse to acknowledge their voices in serious situations. Middle school and high school are cutthroat places, and one mistake can ruin the entirety of the four-six years you spend there. They’re pressured to get good grades or they’ll fail, they have to be part of the cool crowd or they’ll fail, and people are more likely to blame them for whatever goes wrong in their lives than anything that goes on around them.

Doesn’t change the fact that they can be little demons sometimes. With all the hormones and drama, young teenagers can be really emotional and make problems bigger than they seem. They can be harsh and judgmental, because that’s the environment they’re being exposed to. They need guidance, but they don’t want it. They argue with adults and to some, it seems like they want to make their own lives miserable. They can be tough to work with unless you’re willing to take them as seriously as they take themselves, and most people don’t want to bother.

There are shitty things Danny does in canon, but that’s true for literally every fourteen year old. And heck, are you telling me you didn’t do some ridiculously stupid stuff at that age? I actually stole money from my folks to buy something I wanted. My group of friends frequently set stuff on fire in their backyards. And fuck, nobody can prove Danny was spying on girls in the locker room. While I think the scene is shit and refuse to accept it as canon, all we see is Danny coming out of the locker room. He could’ve been just looking to see what it was like in there. Nothing says there were actually girls in there. But I’m so sick of talking about that shit scene, so I’m gonna leave it at that.

Danny has flaws. He can be selfish and petty and inconsiderate. But really? You wanna beat him up for that?

Are you forgetting that he canonically already does get beaten up every single episode? Whether it’s by ghosts, bullies, his own goddam parents, or whatever, getting beat up is something he’s familiar with.

The reason some fans cut him some slack is because, hey, yeah. He is a kid, and you know what? He’s entitled to be a dick sometimes. He loses sleep every night, almost dies on a daily basis, has his dreams ripped away from him often, and is picked on at school. Despite all of that, he still fights ghosts to keep his town safe, and he’s under no obligation to do that. He saves lives, even when people hate him for it. He puts himself in danger, even for those who are cruel to him. He tries to use his powers for the right reason more often than not, and he’ll take the high road against his bully because he feels like he shouldn’t stoop to his level.

We acknowledge that canon can be shit. We acknowledge that sometimes, Danny’s writing makes him out to be a dick. At the “heart of canon,” though, as you so eloquently put it, he’s the kid who risked his life for a little girl he barely knew that nobody else would miss. He’s the one who saves the lives of his own bully, the teacher who used to be so hard on him, and the parents he fully believes would cut him open if they knew what he was. He’s the one who could so easily be Vlad, but instead he tries his best to be a hero.

You’re under no obligation to like him, and you don’t have to ignore the shitty parts of canon like some of us do. I do it just because I enjoy thinking about what the show could’ve been, not what it was. You don’t have to do that, though.

But really, are you going to march into your nearest high school and beat the shit out of the first kid you see messing up? Seriously? You honestly think that the mistakes Danny makes outweigh the good he’s constantly trying to do enough that he deserves that? Even when he already gets beat up in every single episode already?

Well, fine. That’s your pessimistic opinion. It’s not fact, though. How many cartoons do you watch? You gonna beat up Timmy Turner and Jimmy Neutron, too? They can be right assholes. What about Jake Long? He’s a shallow, obnoxious, irresponsible kid a lot of the time. Sure, he’s just 13, but why should we show mercy to kids who mess up? Serena/Usagi from Sailor Moon? Yeah, let’s ignore all the people defending her and just focus on the fact that the show makes her a dumb kid who doesn’t have enough backbone to immediately become the savior of the galaxy. Come to think of it, where’s your rant about Dash Baxter? Or is he not popular enough for you to rag on?

Perfect characters aren’t the ones who are the most upstanding. They’re the ones who are realistic and flawed. So Danny sells his parents stuff. So he sneaked into the girls’ locker room. So he took out his anger on an innocent person.

I’m not saying any of those things weren’t wrong, what I’m saying is that kids make fucking mistakes. And sometimes, they’re huge ones. Sometimes, kids get curious and break into a house. Sometimes they get hungry at the store and shoplift. Sometimes they lie and cheat and make fun of each other. Sometimes they can be perverted little leaches.

So fucking what? We’ve all been there. We all need to learn and grow.

And seriously, if you’re going to be one of those people who gives Sam a break, don’t turn around and start criticizing Danny for the same shitty writing he sometimes gets. That hypocrisy is exactly why I so adamantly defend Sam.

I don’t know what you wanted to accomplish with these asks. Maybe you just wanted to vent. Maybe you were looking to stir up drama. Maybe you don’t know what you wanted and you just sent these asks randomly without any real reason.

Regardless of what you think, I’m still gonna enjoy my fucking fictional character, even if I don’t always agree with how he’s written. I relate to him, his struggles, and even his mistakes. You have fun ripping on characters people like because you don’t think they should be allowed to make mistakes, but let the rest of us have our fun, too. You’re not helping anyone with this, so maybe just fuck off, m’kay?

Being stupidly nice is kind of my thing, but I’m tired of putting up with this self righteous crap. Let characters fuck up. Let fans rewrite things they don’t like. Let people enjoy their fucking cartoon, because they aren’t hurting anyone. I’ve yet to find a single phan who considers the DP cartoon to be completely canon anyway. They enjoy it for the fan content or the few really spot on episodes. We’re already aware that there’s shitty stuff in there, and we don’t need you to tell us.

If I ever get any asks like this that rip on characters for stupid, petty reasons again, I’m deleting them on sight. That was my initial plan anyway, but I really needed to say my piece here.

Tumblr, maybe stop being such judgmental pieces of fucking shit, okay? You’ll accomplish nothing good by being so harsh toward anything that doesn’t fit your standard of “perfect.”

[gizmo1022]

So this is REALLY LONG and PERSONAL and FULL of possible Triggers so read at your own discretion. I just needed to write this out because I’ve been dealing with it for years and...yeah.

My first boyfriend was 24 and I had just turned 18. I was a virgin with stereotypical ideas about a “first time” and was very nervous. He was experienced and pestered me until I gave in, which I did because I thought he wouldn’t want to wait for me and this was my first relationship. I hated it. It was awful, painful, and humiliating. I regretted saying ok the second my clothes were off but I thought I was stuck and couldn't renege because I had no idea how any of this worked. I avoided a second time as much as possible, never saying yes or initiating, but just kinda going with it if he wanted to. I still hated it every time and began to feel incredible self-loathing and disgust. Then I drank alcohol/got drunk for the first time ever at a party. I only remember flashes of that night, but I DO remember he initiated nonconsensual sex with me, HE RAPED ME!, in the back seat of his car. I was under 21 and drunk for the first time, not coherent or responsive at all, and yet that didn’t stop him. Then he bragged about it to all my friends for a week! He kept showing everyone the condom wrapper he kept in the cup holder like it was a trophy and acting like I was ok with all of it. I hated him! Even though I hated him, I felt like I was partially to blame for what happened and I directed a lot of the hate and disgust at myself. I thought I had nobody to talk to because I didn’t understand that I I wasn’t at fault. I thought because he was my boyfriend and because I got drunk, people would say I was at fault. I was also ashamed and couldn’t even tell my parents or brothers etc. I still have never told them. And the most fucked up thing is, I also felt like I couldn’t escape the guy who did this to me because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I HATED him and felt absolute DISGUST every time he touched me or spoke to me, but my fear of confrontation and having someone mad at me kept me from leaving him. Eventually, I did, but it took me outright refusing to be alone with him and acting like a barely functioning zombie before HE realized we had issues and asked me if I wanted to break up. That was MONTHS! It took me months of being miserable and depressed and terrified of being with him until I finally broke up with him and it was only because HE figured out that I wanted out and asked me. I didn't even have the guts to say yes...I just cried and shook my head yes and then waited a half an hour for him to calm down enough to drive me home since I was stranded at his house. 

My second boyfriend was worse. It was years before I even thought about dating again and I was so sure that by that point there had to be something wrong with me because no guys seemed to want to talk to me. Of course I was an extreme loner and never bothered to socialize so that probably didn’t help. So when two guys in my campus cafeteria started flirting with me I thought maybe there was hope for me to be normal after all. Maybe my first relationship aside, I would be able to have a healthy bond with someone. But the fear of intimacy remained and I thought maybe what I needed was to stop taking it so seriously. So one of the guys messaged me that night and it was fine at first until he started getting very forward and sexual. Sending me links to weird sexual positions and asking creepy questions. I was uncomfortable and tried to change the subject or stick to one-word answers in the hopes that he’d realize I wasn’t invested in that type of conversation. But I didn’t stop talking to him. I should’ve, and looking back now, I realize it would’ve been so easy and saved me a lot of grief had I just spoke up or told him to fuck off. But I hadn’t had a real friend or anyone to talk to since high school two years ago and I thought maybe this was just how college guys talked. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings because this was the first person that showed even just friendly interest in me, let alone anything else, in a LONG time. So I kept responding albeit halfheartedly.

That’s when he told me all the sex talk, which he was 100% guilty of, was giving him blue balls and I would be a slut and a bitch if I didn’t take responsibility and have sex with him the next day. I was terrified. I was sick to my stomach and so anxious I thought I might just throw up. But I believed him because I didn’t know that wasn’t a real thing. He made it sound like he was gonna get sick if I didn’t take care of his problem. He made me feel dirty and awful and like I owed him just for being his sounding board for a few hours while he went off on a tangent. I thought about just not going to school. Telling my dad I was sick and skipping classes that day. I thought about NEVER going back to the cafeteria and blocking him so I never saw him again. I thought about a lot of things that I should’ve done but didn’t. I was on the verge of tears when my dad dropped me off at school and was so close to saying something to him. In my head, I was begging him to take me back home and hug me and never let me meet with stupid boys again.But in the end, I went.Because I thought of how much I wanted people to like me and be my friends. I was lonely and still fucked up after my first boyfriend. Is spent the whole morning trying to convince myself it was ok, just part of the college experience, lots of people hook up and maybe that’s what I needed to be more normal and accepting of intimacy. People who treated sex more like a casual/fun activity seemed to be happier, right? SO I met him with my mind in panic mode, feeling conflicted and disgusted by myself. He then had a friend, a guy I had never met, drive the two of us to that guy’s apartment. I was so scared and really wanted to back out but by that point, it was impossible because I was stranded in a strange man’s apartment and I had no idea where I even was. And calling my dada at that point was out of the question because I was too ashamed to even admit what was happening. And so started the most awkward, awful sex ever. I once again HATED it. I thought maybe I hated it with my first boyfriend because I wasn’t ready yet or it wasn't what I had imagined, or he wasn’t any good at it. Now I wasn’t sure if I just hated sex in general or if the first time ruined it for me forever. All I knew was I wanted it to end so I can go home and cry myself into oblivion. ANd the whole time, the friend was right outside listening in like a creep. Afterwards, without even discussing it with me, the blueballs douchebag insists we’re dating now, and I just went with it. I CANT BELIEVE I SAID SURE WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME I NEVER WANTED TO SEE HIM AGAIN AND I HATED HIM WHY WOULD I AGREE TP DATE HIM AM I STUPID DO I JUST LIKE PUNISHING MYSELF I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH!!! I agreed because I’m a fuckup that can’t even disappoint people I don’t like, and I was desperate for someone to talk to/friends at school and because I was so disgusted with the idea of having a one-night stand I thought dating him would at least make that better. WORST DECISION OF MY LIFE! OR CLOSE TO IT BECAUSE I FUCKUP A LOT AND WITH EXTREME RESULTS! 

My second boyfriend NEVER stopped ever. I was always afraid of being alone with him. I only went to his house if I knew his parents would be there and even then he’d sneak around every chance he got to touch me or make me touch him. I NEVER initiated it. I NEVER asked for it, I NEVER SAID YES!, I NEVER EVER EVER like it or wanted it. I thought there was something wrong with me, that I was weird and just would never enjoy or look forward to or want sex at all and that when he started on me, I had to take it because that’s what girlfriends do and I was fucked up in the head and he was the normal one. I THOUGHT ALL OF THAT!! But it wasn’t just once in a while. He was obsessed. He’d drag me into the woods, he’d make us sit in the back of the theater when all I wanted was to watch a damn movie, he sneaks into the bathroom with me, he’d put his hands on me even when I was home in my living room with my brothers (including two small children) running around. He NEVER STOPPED AND I HATED IT! But I didn’t know how to say no or get away from him. ALL I knew was to bear with it and try to keep distance between us as much as possible. The worst was on a school field trip to six flags. I took a blanket because I like to sleep on long rides and it was gonna be chilly at night. He took it as an opportunity to put his fingers in my panties the whole ride and I was TERRIFIED AND MORTIFIED. SO scared someone would notice, that we’d get in HUGE trouble, that my parents would know, that people KNEW what he was doing. I was so scared but I couldn’t do anything to stop him without bringing attention to myself. I wanted to cry. I wanted TO DIE! I would've rather take a BULLET TO THE FACE than have his hands on me especially when others could see. I HATED HIM SO MUCH! Eventually, I tried to kill myself, badly...I had no idea ibuprofen wasn’t exactly deadly...took SO many and it did nothing but make me nauseous...And mister asshole boyfriend broke his promise 5 minutes after making it by telling everyone including his parents some crazy abridged story about how I was clinging to life and he found me, he didn't, and heroically rescued me. I overheard it all becaus eth estuff they gave me made me unable to move enought to even open my eyes or speak but I was fully aware of my surroundings. That was finally enough for me to break up with him...albeit I had help from some new friends who hated him and my family...who HATED him. 

My last boyfriend was a “niceguy” who helped me leave boyfriend2 because he liked me and then pestered me to date him for a year. I finally did thinking he helped me so much I guess I owe him and maybe the first two were just awful and this wholesome guy will be exactly what I need. BIG MISTAKE NICE GUYS ARE ONLY NICE BECAUSE THEY WANT THINGs. THAT IS GENERALIZING IM AWARE AND I KNOW It's NOT TRUE ASSHOLES I HAVE % BROTHERS I KNOW ALL MEN ARENT BAD SO SHUT UP I JUST APPARENTLY ONLY ATTRACT BAD GUYS EVEN WHEN THEY'RE POSING AS GOOD GUYS! I thought I could trust him and be open and honest with him. I thought he was different! He knew what bf2 did and that I didn’t want sex. He KNEW and went into our relationship knowing that but still bothered me about it. He said he was willing to wait but he was a desperate virgin and his patience would only go so far. I gave him a really far away option...when/if we move in together, thinking it would either long ways away or never happen. I was upfront about it all and he SAID IT WAS OK. but still bothered me about it, trying to get me to make it happen sooner. And I AM AN IDIOT I SAID FINE MAYBE IF WERE JUST NOT AT EITHER OF OUR HOUSES OR A FRIENDS BUT A NEUTRAL PLACE. IM SO DUMB OF COURSE HE’D CONVINCE ME TO GIVE HIM A LOOPHOLE BECAUSE I HATE PEOPLE BEING UPSET WITH ME AND I GIVE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT EVEN IF IT DESTROYS ME! So after months of buttering me up with expensive gifts, that I didn’t need nor want... I HATE JEWELRY JUST CUZ MOST GIRLS LIKE IT AND ITS EXPENSIVE DOESNT MAKE IT A UNIVERSAL PERFECT GIFT AND IF HE HAD NO IDEA I’D SAY THANKS BUT I KNEW HE’D WANT TO GET ME JEWELRY AND I HATE IT/THINK IT’S A WASTE OF MONEY SO I TOLD HIM NEVER TO BUY ME ANY BUT HE DID BECAUSE HE LIKES TO LOOK GOOD AND GENEROUS TO FRIENDS AND HAVING HIS GF WEARING JEWELRY MAKE HIM HAPPY BUT HE GODDAMN KNEW I DIDNT WANT ANY UCKING ASSHOLE JUST TRYING TO MAKE HIMSELF LOOK GOOD AND ME UNGRATEFUL IN CASE WE EVER GOT IN A FIGHT OR BROKE UP FUCKING GUILT TRIPPING M WHO GUIT TRIPS HERSELF WORSE THAN ANYONE I HATE HIM!...He plans an expensive trip to Boston, basically trying to guilt/bribe me for sex using the hotel as his loophole. I KNEW that’s what he was doing but he already spent the money and I felt bad. And a little part of me thought...naw “niceguy” wouldn’t do that so it’s gotta be a misunderstanding and he’s just trying to give me an early bday present before the semester started. 

NOPE! We had fun, he spent money, then we went into a convenience store and started showing me condoms and asking me about them. I shut down. I couldn't even function enough to smile anymore. I stared at him in disbelief and walked away without saying a word. I KNOW he knows I was avoiding/running away from the question. Like who just walks away with a bitchface and doesn’t answer a question if they don’t want to talk about it. I should’ve said no right there and then. He may have even listened to me. He would’ve been grumpy and bitchy...might have even tried laying on the guilt, but an outright NO probably would’ve been enough. But what if it wasn’t? I was stuck there far from home with no money and he was spending so much that I felt guilty LIKE HE WANTED ME TO FEEL GULIT-TRIPPINGSEX FROM AN UNWILLING PERSON!!! I didn’t want to, I felt like there must be something wrong with me for not wanting to, that maybe it was unfair to him because I wasn't sure I'd EVER want to and does that mean I was leading him ON? But he knew why?! He knew I had been traumatized!?? I didn’t want to but I thought I was being unfair for not wanting to and I was afraid to vocalize my feelings, afraid to upset him or let him down. I didn’t know how to say no with my words so I tried with my body language and GOD ALL I WANTED WAS FOR HIM TO NOTICE! Why the hell did he not notice if he was so in love with me?! How could he not tell by my complete mood shift, inability to make eye contact, absolute refusal to respond to the subject, my stiff frightened body language and the simple fact that he KNEW I was afraid of sex and he never stated that this trip was all an expensive/elaborate ploy for me to give in and get him laid. 

So night came, the room had a jacuzzi, I wore a GODDAMN BATHING SUIT IN IT HOPING HE’D GET THE HINT I DIDN’T WANT THIS, and when he went to shower I put PJS on and turned the lights out and PRAYED I would fall asleep and he’d give up. He didn’t. He woke me up. He didn’t ask...just started stripping us. I was so broken. I just cried. I cried...SOBBED...the whole time and kept trying to pull away from him. He tried to get me on top and I just kept rolling away and crying until he gave that up. He took what he wanted and I didn’t participate at all. Then I had to sleep next to him all night...ride home with him and act like everything was fine. He knew he fucked up too. I don’t think he understood how bad....if I accused him of rape HE ABSOLUTELY DID RAPE ME!! he’d probably be confused and deny it because he’s a “niceguy” and an idiot and he deserved it for waiting a few months and buying me things. I completely turned off. I was so depressed and so angry and so ashamed and conflicted that I barely responded to him at all and I could tell he knew I was pissed. He tried to buy me off again HE BOUGHT ME A GODDAMN LAPTOP, and of course our families and friends only saw that...him being generous and me being cold so it was all my fault and when we broke up I lost ALMOST ALL the friends I had made BECAUSE THEY DIDN”T KNOW I NEVER TOLD ANYONE! AND HELL NOBODY WOULD BELIEVE ME ANYWAY CUZ HE’s SO NICE AND BUYS ME THINGS!!! After a few months f being angry/afraid/short-tempered of him and cold-shouldering him he realized it was pretty much over and broke up with me THANK GOD I AM SO BAD AT DOING THE BREAKING UP I WAS HOPING HE’D DO IT. Although he had the nerve to act like I was the one that hurt him with my depression and disdain...like poor him...I was bad for his mental state and made him stressed. 

I wish that was it but there’s more. This guy who I was friends with and wasn’t mutually connected to bf3 started showing interest in me when I was finally single...but in a bad way. I used to love hanging out with him and our friend Angie. But I was single and Angie wasn’t and he started being creepy. Insisting on being my ride everywhere even though my dad was fine with driving me or Angie would’ve been more convenient. Then when I was alone with him he would talk nonstop about my body in sexual ways... asks me if he could give me a massage and asking me for favors. I declined but he was persistent and handsy and even whipped out his dick in the car and tried to push my head onto it before I pulled away and said no. I don’t know where the strength to say no was coming from in this case....maybe his laidback attitude made it easier. But it’s not like that ever stopped him completely. He never got his feelings hurt about it and never stopped asking. So I went to great lengths to avoid rides with him. Not going to fun things if I had no ride, making up lies and excuses, hiding in the bushes after Angie’s baby shower so he thought I’d been picked up since my ride was gonna be late. I even lied about my phone being lost as the reason I couldn’t return his calls. One time I got stuck accepting a ride from him from the mall to my house only for him to immediately pull into a corner of the mall garage and say he was too tired to drive but giving me a massage would relax him.I was panicking and very uncomfortable with the things he’d been saying and doing so I faked a phone call from my dad and that convinced him to drive me home. The WHOLE ride...20+ minutes...he spent talking about my boobs. The final straw was him trying to get me to pose in skimpy outfits in a hotel for him...I just knew that was a dumb disaster waiting to happen. SO I stopped hanging out with him AND Angie because I needed to cut ties with him completely and she kinda went her own way with the baby and her asshole fiance.

ONE MORE THING! When I was dating bf2 we got in a fight WHY DIDN’T I BREAK UP WITH HIM THEN AND THERE!? and I ran off campus into the city and got lost. I only had my dad’s and his # and wasn’t willing to call either of them for help (my dad cuz I would’ve had some explaining to do). SO I’m lost, kinda scared, wandering the streets with a backpack on and in Ninja Turtle PJ bottoms. An older guy stops and asks me if I need a ride and I said no...cuz you know hitchhiking is dangerous, stupid, and illegal. I said no 3 times but the guy didn’t speak very good English ALTHOUGH NO IS PRETTY FUCKING UNIVERSAL!, so I gave in awkwardly and explained I just was lost and needed a ride to campus. He said ok and started driving...and asked me how old I was...If I like alcohol and wanted a drink...offered me a lollipop from his glove compartment I AM NOT SHITTING YOU OR EXAGGERATING THIS 100% HAPPENED IT WAS SO CREEPY! And then I’m getting really nervous cuz we’re getting to like suburbs which is NOT where school is and he pulls into a cul-de-sac and I’m so scared at this point. Then he asks me how much for a BJ. THE FUCK I’M EARLY TWENTIES IN MY PJS WITH MY BACKPACK AND I TOLD HIM I JUST WANTED TO GET BACK TO SCHOOL AND WHAT HE THINKS I’M A PROSTITUTE OR SOMETHING? Not that there’s anything wrong with being a prostitute but that’s definitely NOT ME. SO I’m telling him No and fumbling for the door and he’s mad now but more worried I’m gonna report him and says he doesn’t want trouble so he drives back to the main road and tells me to get out. I’m even more hopelessly lost than before and so much for random old man’s act of kindness, he wasn’t gonna help me unless I gave him a BJ wth?! SO I ended up having to call my bf that I was mad at and get directions back to campus and when I showed everyone the lollipop OF COURSE I TOOK IT I’M NOT RUDE BUT I WASN’T GONNA EAT IT They were all blown away and making fun of me etc. SO don’t hitchhike ever is the moral of this story. Also, even kind looking old men can be creeps. Also, don’t get lost in anger in cities. 

The final thing to say is. I don't know if I’m asexual and that’s why I never liked sex or if I don’t like it because I had bad experiences or both. I don't know if I’ll ever be able to be intimate and like it. But I WANT TO because I WANT kids more than anything! I want kids so bad and I’m getting close to thirty now and every time I have somebody that might be interested in me...I sabotage it because I start panicking and it’s like...once I get what I want I don’t want it anymore. I need a man to have kids (I could never adopt with my history of self-harm etc.) but I think I’m so screwed up it’s never gonna happen and time is running out and I don’t wanna even live if I can’t have kids. Like I get it...some women are happy without them. That’s awesome. That’s NOT me. I want my own children so much I feel like my life is meaningless without them. And I’m starting to give up on the idea because not only can I not do relationships anymore because of all this trauma, but what guys would WANT to be with someone like me anyway. And if I’m so fucked up maybe it’s better I DON’T have kids because I’ll probably just fuck them up too! SO why am I even trying? Why am I still living? Kids are the only thing in this world that I want and without them, I feel like I have nothing...no future and so no reason to live. I just wanna die. And I’m SO ANGRY that these men contributed to all this. If I can never be fixed...if this is really all that there is...if they ruined me forever then what’s even the point?! 

But I can’t die because I have ittle brothers...they’re just kids....and me dying would be so selfish and painful for them. I’m trapped. Trapped in a life I don’t want that’s never gonna be worthwhile, feeling depressed and like shit and dwelling on trauma from the past....stuck with all this pain because I have to live for other people’s happiness. I’ll never find happiness. and Living means misery. But My misery is not as important as their happiness...I’m living...barely...just for my brothers and I don’t know if I can keep it up forever. I feel like I’m gonna break permanantly one day and I’m gonna hurt them. Is it only amatter of time. I’ve been hospitalized 4 times in the last decade for hurting myself....maybe there’s a limit to this. I’m just SO conflicted. Why does everything have to be so goddamn diffiult? My financial situation, lack of career, fear of driving, awful intimacy/trauma issues and just overall depression anxiety and self loathing make life so hard. But I LOVE my brothers. I just wish they did’t love me back. If they didn’t I could die without guilt. There’s just no easy way out is there.

[vertigoambrosia]

woke up three hours before my alarm, have to go to work adn have a lto to do

true colors please make me want to live

a weirdly wholesome beginning

i am not big on the font for this event but i do really like the colors

i don’t understand how the forest is relevant but it’s not not relevant

oh boy andy jackson is going solo again...i miss alan

my friend thought alan was hella boring

lol looks like aussie open found their belts

god i love how fucking stupid jay and francis are

HAHAHA jay skillet too busy yelling at the crowd to look at the belts

tas just ring the bell

that moonsault looked a little...weird? or maybe it’s just cause they cut to the camera on the balcony so the perspective was off

who did jay team with before francis?

the hard cam being on the balcony is hard to get used to

the lingering fog makes the lighting look very soft

it’s weird but not in a bad way

WTF DID MARK DAVIS JUST DO

WHAT WAS THAT

that was a lot of fun

i don’t have a good handle on oliver carter at all really except that in wxw he tries to kick dudes in the nuts

i have a feeling it’d be a bad idea to hit veit in the rocky mountain oysters

veit pls call tim and convince him to make up with walter

or at least keep being your stepdad

shoutouts to the person booing the people chanting NXT

yes we are all on wrestling twitter we know oliver is signed to wwe

andy pulling a rico adn mentioning how big and strong and in shape veit looks

i would ask ‘where is rico anyway’, but the answer is probably ‘on vacation smoking pot’

oh shit that was a nice catch

*reaction shot of old man politely clapping*

lol what if that was veit’s dad

remember when walter fought veit and was like ‘imma imbarass you in frnt of your mom’ but then there wasn’t a ‘beats him up in front of his parents’ spot?

accidentally twitter spoiled myself for this match and i will admit the result makes me roll my eyes

also still hate that this is not only a 3 way for no reason, but a 3 way we literally saw last week

valkyrie’s gear is really interesting; i cant say i like it, but it’s got style

couldn’t they at least have recorded a plot segment with any of these women interacting beforehand?

ohhh that was a fucking great spot! double kill!

i feel like amale does something cool like that neck lock and then she just pauses

YEAH VALKYRIE DON’T TAKE THAT SLAP BULLSHIT

why does amale do a hip attack? it doesn’t fit her at all

lol at the guy yelling YOU ARE LOSER at amale

ohhh nooo valkyrie def missed that dropkick

this is a lot better than the match last week i have to admit

ok i guess i’m not so upset about that win

i still don’t understand why they’re putting so much behind amale but whatever

‘lucky and brooksy, a friendship that’s supposed to last forever’ man german commentary sounds so fun

antway i may also know the result of this one but i’m not 100% sure

here’s douchebag dad

lucky’s lil fighting stance is adorable

oh how DARE you muss up his hair

oh my god that thumbs up

did they clear that seat in the front row just so andy coudl sit in it?

sorry i zoned out for a bit and also had to make fun of variety’s twitter for posting something that had DO NOT POST on it

if people don’t pay attention to detail,. what do they pay attention to?

ok also i took a nap and now actually have to get ready for work so i can’t finish this

tuning the band will never not be stupid it’s the biggest telegraph in the world

awww i believed in that rollup

a lot of people are rooting for andy but now that he’s not champion it bothers me less

LUCKY GO UP THERE DON’T HESITATE

oh nooooo

i do like how lucky sometimes looks like he’s looking for guidance from the crowd

he’s still a lil unsure of being on his own and the crowd means a lot to him

also love when he al

man andy’s moonsault is really good too bad he always msises

WHAT

RAINER GODDAMMIT

lucky is literally that gif of the dude going ???

that’s a bad description i know

oh shit i might have time for another match before work

ok not if they replay a promo

good thing nobody gives a fuck when i come in!

jurn is trying to be so badass whereas aj is just effortlessly being a little shit

i have a feeling they’re pushing the crown so juju and yuta aren’t winning this, but i would love to see the good boys win

ok i actually don’t ahve the time for this but i would like to say i am happy that the crowds are cheering for yuta

GET THAT NONSENSE OUT OF HERE lol aj

to be continued...not at work though cause i have shit to do and it’s for someone i actually respect [and is cute but shhh that has nothing to do with anything]

[skiasurveys]

love surveyyy

1: Do you have a crush at the moment? take a guess.

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? i am currently. first time.

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in?  the one i am currently in is the longest which is right now 1 year and 3 months <3

4: Have you ever changed for someone? Yeah and i have for the good and also for the bad.

5: How is your relationship with your ex?  i dont talk to any of them anymore. I deleted their numbers and have deleted them off social medias, i somehow still have them on snapchat..

6: Have you ever been cheated on? not that i know of

7: Have you ever cheated? NO

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating?i would only do that if i didnt believe what the others said. but most likely i wouldnt lol

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship?  trust and companionship 

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? serious

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”?  no i think breaks are just a code word for breaking up and wanting to fuck other people 

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?  if by definition of hook up you mean fucking, no i havet ever hooked up with someone. I only have sex with someone im dating.

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship? dating someone i didnt like but only doing it because i thought i should and everyone liked the guy. smh.

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? kids shouldnt be having sex..

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”?  im bias cause my boyfriend is 6.5 years older than me but im over 18 and so its not really weird then. but i dont like huge age gaps. as long as youre both legal adults and theyre not like 18 and 36 than whatevs.

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”? nah

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? yah i think so. if you talk to them everyday maybe. but i think you need to do more than just texting. Like video chats but idk i think its kind of hard. i can see it happening if you met online and then eventually met irl but just thru via internet nah. idk i just feel like physical relationships are better than none. thats me though.

18: What do you consider a deal breaker? cheating and drugs. and lying about hardcore shit.

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? when you stop feeling things for them, stop caring. or if you can see that its going no where. or if you just know they are not good for you.

20: Are you currently in a relationship? yep. 1 year and 3 months.

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? eh. if youre mature  i guess. but someone you were super in love with..then you end it..can be hard to stay “friends” without someone still hoping they can work it out. Maybe like where you talk and are mature but not friends. im sure anyone whose mature can talk to an ex without it  being weird. unless you broke up for diff reasons.

22: Do you think people should date their friends? yeah sure

23: How many relationships have you had?  4 including the one i am in. 

24: Do you think love can last forever?  i do

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?  no

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of?  no. unless it was a super good reason..with proof. but im 20 i dont really care what they have to say about my relationships. Unless its to help me. (eg. hes abusive/etc)

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?  Only date someone you actually like.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?  trust and lots of effort and communication. You have to be the type of person to handle that stuff though. i cant do it 

29: What do you notice first about another person? how they treat me and how they smile.

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? straight

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?  no. Obvs something hardcore like sociopath or psychopath would be a deal breaker but 

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? yea

33: Do you want to get married one day? one day

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed?  dumb. i love my boyfriend and we want to be together forever but shit happens and also i just find it kind of stupid. Unless they like died and you wanted a memory of them i guess.

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?   no

36: Are you still a virgin? no

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? both are equal to me.

38: Do you enjoy love films? yeah they can be good. it depends though i hate stupid troupes ( eg. nerd girl dates hot boy. nerd boy gets hot girl. )

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? yea

40: Have you ever had a valentine? yes. and actually in my last relationship he dumped me on valentines day after spending about 70 dollars on me! lmao. Oh well it was a short relationship and looking back at it i laugh lmao. thank god im not dating him anymore.

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”?  going out somewhere..having fun and enjoying eachother. doesnt even have to spend a lot of money either. 

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? no

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? both. I am not gonna choose my man over my friends but i will not choose them over my boyfriend. If he needed me asap i would go to him, and vice versa if they needed me i would go to them. I need a balance of friends and my boyfriend. 

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? yeah very actually 

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends? no

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”?  nope.

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite?dont have one lol

48: What’s your favorite love song?  there is a lot of them.

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? yeah. oh well shit happens. i always feel bad but sometimes you cant be with someone or you dont want to be with them.

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are? n/a

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy? this is a dumb question. a poor nice guy. lmao

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?  i think so. yet im really dumb with my own stuff. its that whole heart over mind. mind over heart. of course i can tel my friend to dump her bf if hes being stupid cus im not romantically involved but with me and my relationship issues its diff.

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single? yeah. i gt jealous even now when im with my bf, especially couples who are super good with eachother. and girls who are independent and not jealous cus im always jealous.

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?  eh. my boyfriend doesnt have it on there but its not like he hides our relationship. i dont think its overly important. unless youre hiding it.

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”? overly attached. i think.

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? no.

57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart? suicide is never silly.

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship? sub.

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary? no

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships? stupid.

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family? depends on the situation. <--- same

62: How do you define “cheating”? if you have to hide it, youre cheating.

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate? no. just dont brag about it or be like “damn they fck better than you” this hasnt happened to me but i know if it did i would be angry lol

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated?  yeah. i dont want my boyfriend to spend money on me because he thinks he has too.

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”? yes

[theeyeofinfinity]

Late night attempt to put myself to rest

I cant sleep & i have work tomorrow at 4am (mind you its almost midnight as I'm writing this), so i figured maybe if i wrote down all my current thoughts I'd get tired. Who wouldnt get tired of listening to me, even I get tired of listening to me. I find it weird that for as long as i can remember, my only two concerns in life were what i was going to do for a living & who i was going to be with for the rest of my life. The only two things. Ever. Even now, they havent changed. I'll flip flop back & forth between the two but as of now ive just wondered about my love life. It seems like thats all i ever talk about. Love, pain from losing someone i love, being haunted by former loves. No matter how much i talk about it or put it in writing it doesn't hurt any less or make any more sense that it did before. Today i saw my ex girlfriend's ex at walmart & i could not tell you how angry i was for a split second. I was just seething & i couldnt understand why. Yes i could. I hate that guy so much & nothing will ever change how little i think of him. But the person on the opposite end of the spectrum fell in love with him & loved him seemingly more than she ever did me. Boy did that hurt. It makes me feel dumb for wanting to be with her, even after all that. It is dumb. Like who could want a person after that. She left with no warning (to this day I'm convinced she cheated & just said she lost feelings to get out of having to say something), doesn't value me at all (i called her out on it & gave her a choice & it seems like she chose to just not bother with me lol) & just overall isnt the best person ever. None of us are really but she just brought out the ugliest parts of me & i cant understand why i crave her so much. She gets me now that she's in the same boat with the most stereotypical sad boy douchebag ive ever seen. Yet, I'm always getting myself in situations where i help her. I don't know why i want to help her, she does not deserve any of my kindness in any way shape or form. But i keep giving it to her for god knows what reason. Now she's going through this bad boy & wannabe bad girl phase & ive just never seen someone so out of place. She's suddenly into black guys & listens to rap 95% of the time & is starting to pick up more & more of the slang & its just sad. Its because of her that i ended up finding myself because when she ditched me i had nothing BUT myself. So now i know who i am & what i can be. On her end tho she looks beyond lost. Everything she's trying to be now is not what she is. I don't know what got into her (besides that piece of shit wannabe bad boy) but she was never meant to be any of that. She was always looking to help people, loved really old stuff, listened to these weird indie bands, liked all these weird designs & just overall, was her. Now she's the complete opposite & its hard to see her in that light because to me she's living a lie. She could have changed & that really is who she is but i could never know for sure because i'll never be able to get that close to her again. It amazes me that my mind still finds ways to wander back to her. Its been so long i just want to forget & find someone new to fill that hole. Part of me just wants to give up on finding love entirely, ive been out of it for so long i cant really bring myself to climb back into it. She knows what i feel & where i stand, to some extent. When i talk to her i just want to push her away & keep her at a distance so she doesn't get to comfortable with me because i want her to feel like she lost me (which is stupid because i still talk to her & I'm literally there all the time) but at the same time i want to hold her close to me because i do still miss having her to hold. Or maybe i just miss the memories but not the person. It would make sense because i really don't want her near me but when i think of our memories i want nothing more than to hold her tight & kiss her forehead & tell her how much i love & miss her. Some part of me still wakes up hoping it was all some horrible nightmare. Or that maybe, just maybe, i might be in a coma & when i wake up she'll be right there holding my hand. We'll both cry & i swear i'll marry her on the spot. These last two years have been hell. I'm glad she'll probably never read this. Lord knows what would happen if she did. Nothing. Nothing would happen. Who am i kidding. If she did read this she'd sit there thinking man this dude really needs to get over me. She'd be thinking the right thing tho. I'd give anything to delete the haunting memories i have & just not feel any of the things i have been. I hope she knows that the day i do get over all of this is the day i most likely won't ever talk to her again. When i finally conquer this emotional mountain, i won't be climbing back down the same side. When I'm done I'm done for good. Right now i guess talking to you has just been some insane attempt at closure. Or reliving some of the glory days. Whatever does end up happening i know i won't have to worry about her. She won't ever miss me. If i go its really only for me because she doesn't care what way it goes. Only highlights how little i mean even more honestly. Its not like i have anything she wants other than a shoulder to cry on. & she can get that anywhere.

[snake-house]

Takao Kazunari X Male!Reader X ???

title: cant you see.

Takao Kazunari X Male!Reader X ??? warnings: sexual themes??? not really, language, mentions of mpeg he/him pronouns used for reader whenever you see '--' it means some time has passed or pov switch omegaverse au **Onesided, reader loves Takao, but... ___

"Honestly, you guys are perfect together." You blinked at Takao, wondering why on earth would he say something like that. "Excuse me?" You asked, eyebrows narrowed at the taller male beside you. It was just like you to get your hopes up that you two would have a normal conversation as you walked home. "You and Shin-chan, you guys are so cute together." He beamed with a closed eye smile. Oh, that's what he was going on and on about, maybe you shouldn't have zoned out for a moment. "We're not even dating, and don't even have interest in each other," You commented indifferently, "Why are you saying that?" "Because it's true! You guys have so much in common, it would be a shame if he didn't court you by the end of the year, because if he doesn't I'll be sure to ask you." He talked so casually on the topic, how was it so easy for him. You refused to let yourself blush at his words, "Then I guess I better get ready for you to meet my parents, because that is never going to happen. Midorima is asexual and probably straight or at least bi, while I am really gay and really really like sex." You stated simply, side-eyeing Takao. You heard him laugh and slap a hand on your shoulder, making you stumble a bit with the force behind it, "He may be asexual, but that doesn't mean he despises sex, he's one of those sex-positive aces. It's something that's not always on his mind, or like want it all the time." You nodded at his explanation, "And you can trust my word, I asked him about it a while back since I didn't understand." "Oh," You cleared your throat, "But still, not going to happen, I am fine with whoever I end up with. My parents have been talking about an arranged marriage for like the past few months, 'cause I'm about to graduate, so you both may be too late." You grin seeing Takao's shoulders slump forward. "I wish you were in our year [Name]-chan," The boy whined, "Then you wouldn't have to worry about that and Midorima would have time to grow a pair and court you." "Why did you even bring up this topic?" You asked suddenly, stopping as you realized that you were in front of your house. He smiled at you, "Because I want my two best friends to be happy, and I am the best matchmaker, and I know you two would be wonderful together." With a sigh you turned to walk towards the front door, "Right, I'll call you the best matchmaker when one of your couples get married, anyways, goodnight. Are you still coming over this weekend? My mom wanted me to ask again just to be sure." "You'll see! And yes, I'll be over after practice Saturday, good night [Name]-chan!" He chimed before stalking off towards his own home a block away. You smiled and pulled out your house key and quickly headed to your room once inside. You threw your bag on your bed and made haste as you changed out of your school uniform. There was enough time before dinner you could do your homework and play on your phone. But even after having that conversation with Takao on your way home, nothing would have prepared you for the conversation you had with your parents during lunch. You were just relieved you were an only child and didn't have a sibling to scar. "[Name], your father and I have been talking lately," Your mother started, sharing a look with your father before continuing and looking at you, "But if we were to arrange a marriage for you, would you prefer it to be with a male of female?" You spit out your tea. "Wh-What?" "Would you like a husband or a wife, is what I'm asking. We have a few people in mind for either gender." She explained, but your head was still reeling. How could they know? You were out to your friends, but not your parents. "Uh, why do you ask?" You mumbled, looking away. She smiled and placed a hand over yours from across the table, "Because your sexuality will have a lot to do with if you'll be the one to have kids or not, since you're an omega. I thought they taught you these kinds of things in school?" She replied, "We want you to have some choice in the marriage." "They did... I guess I didn't look too much into it." You looked in between your parents for a moment, still unsure, "Um, would you be mad if I said a husband?" It barely came out as a whisper. There was a soft laugh from your mom, and then your dad joined in, "Why would we be mad?" "I don't know... I guess I was just scared." You said with a shrug of your shoulders. They could know you're gay, but they couldn't know how you spent your heats since you presented a year ago. "It's ok, really, we love you no matter what gender you're interested in." Your mother cooed, "We'll talk about this some more when we narrow down some of our options." And that was the end of that conversations. -- - "They really asked you that?" - Takao asked from the other side of the phone. You flopped down on your bed and groaned, "I know right? It was so weird and so embarrassing." You mumbled, "They basically asked me if I like dick or vagina and it was awkward." - "Well that's what you get for not coming out to them sooner, you should have told them when you told me and Shin-chan." - You sighed, you knew he was right. It would have saved you some dignity. "What am I gonna do if they pick out a douchebag for me to marry?" - "You refuse the marriage, and if they disown you, me or Shin-chan will make you our wife!" - He said it like it was so obvious. You snorted at the response, "Yeah right, like I could do that. My parents are leaving me all their stocks and investments, I can't let them disown me like that." - "I didn't peg you to be a gold digger [Name]-chan." - Takao teased, making you sputtered. "That's not what I meant! I mean by that, they sacrificed so much to give me a good life, even after they die, so I can't leave them like that." Your voice was heavy with voice. - "Hey-hey, [Name], it's ok, I didn't mean to hurt you," - His voice was so soft, and so kind, you smiled unconsciously, - "I understand what you mean, how you feel about leaving your parents is how I feel about my little sis. She's the one person I can't bear to let down or leave. I'm glad you have a bond like that with your parents, it's good, it's healthy. Just remember that." - Again, you were smiling, "Thank you Kazu, I mean it. I don't know why you keep telling me I fit well with Midorima, it's you I fit well with." Oh no. Did you just say that? A flush overtook your face, you needed to back out now before he read too much into your almost confession, "A-Anyways, gotta go, school in the morning. See you tomorrow!" And you hung up. You put your face in your pillow and screamed. He was never supposed to know, and if he really thought about your words, he would. He would know you deepest secret. The secret being that you've been in love with your junior by one year since the day you met him. You fell head over heels the instant you met him during lunch the second week of school last year. You ran into him and spilled your water all over yourself, he offered to help you clean up, apologizing for your mistake, and when you met his eyes as you tried to apologize, you were done for. He was the one, and would always be the one. You may have been a newly presented omega, and Takao being un-presented at the time didn't bother you at all. He could have turned out to be a beta and you would still love him. Every time you let an alpha spend your heat with you, it was him you were thinking of. Takao taking care of you. Takao telling you that he'd make it better. Takao telling you all those dirty things he wanted to do for you. Kazunari wanting you, helping you, filling you up to the brim with his cum. It was always him. But all he saw was how 'compatible' you and his best friend were. Couldn't he see it was him you wanted? Sure he joked about marrying you if Midorima didn't get his hands on you, but he never seemed like he meant it. He meant it just as a peg to get Midorima to make a move on you. You wanted Takao to make a fucking move already. Now you were going die because of this minor slip up and the fact you were probably going to marry some stranger when the one you really wanted was right in front of you in his stupid alpha height and laid back demeanor. Why couldn't you have him... -- Thankfully you were successful in ignoring Takao for the majority of the day, but it was only Wednesday, and you would have two more days to avoid him until Saturday. But on your walk home from school, you were pulled backwards from a tug at your backpack into two strong arms. When you looked up to see who it was, you blushed and shrunk down. There were two light blue eyes staring down at you, narrowed in frustration, something you've only seen on the court. "H-Hey Takao..." You mumbled. He let go of you and let you take a step away and fix your shirt. "Hey [Name]-chan, why have you been ignoring me?" Straight to the point again. You shrugged, looking down at your feet. He was using his alpha authority against you, you could feel it. He wanted you to submit to his will and tell him everything, but you weren't that easy of an omega like most people thought. "Have I? I've just been kind of put off because of this arranged marriage thing," You trailed off slightly, "My parents are treating me like I'm dainty and made of glass or something and it's kind of annoying." "You're lying." Takao stated sternly, "Your voice always wavers at the end like that when you lie." Damn, he knew you too well. "So what if I am?" You shot back suddenly, meeting him in a sharp glare, "It's not like you're my boyfriend or anything to make assumptions like you have the right to know what's going on. Maybe I just want to deal with this by myself." "Because I know you [Name]," He sighed, he sounded like he was trying to control himself from blowing up on you as he pinched the bridge of his nose, "I'm your best friend, I should know, so if something is really bothering you, I can share your baggage." His words were undeniably sweet, but you couldn't have that quickly. "Then if you know me so well as you state, you should know what's up." You spat, "I promised my mom I'd help her with dinner tonight." You stated before continuing your walk towards your house. Takao caught up with you after he understood what you said, "[Name]," He paused and let an unknown emotion wash over his face for a moment, "Is... are you acting like this because I keep pushing Shintarou on you?" His voice was quiet. Technically he was right, but didn't hit the nail on the head, "Partially, yes. It's annoying and I'm not the slightest bit interested in him, and I texted him this morning, and he feels the same." You explained, your words were no longer as rough. "I'll stop then," He said immediately, "I'm sorry [Name], I thought I was being a good friend by trying to get you a boyfriend that would like you." Pain flashed in his eyes, "Because I hate seeing you sneak off with those shady guys during your heats." His voice was oh so soft, it made you weak. He was too sweet for his own good. You were surprised a cute girl hasn't snatched him up. You were glad someone hasn't, but it was hard to believe. You couldn't stop the blush forming on your cheeks, "Thank you for worrying, but those 'shady guys' are better than doing it alone. Alpha ruts are nothing compared to the three to seven days of absolute pain I feel every few months. You get yours once a year." You paused and sighed, "Anyways, I'll be engaged soon and I can rely on the fiancé my parents chose." Your words were laced with sorrow and pain, it made Takao flinch. "Then maybe... maybe you should try it with Shin-chan, so you can be engaged to someone you know, and not a stranger." Takao reasoned, and you blew up. "SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HIM KAZUNARI! Why can't you see me? Why can't you hear me? Haven't you been listening? Haven't you heard all the times I've almost slipped up? It's YOU goddamnit! Why are you so dense, why..." You didn't know when you started crying, but there was no stopping the hot salty tears now, "It's you I wish I could have, I like you, I love you, and all you want to do is push me away to someone else. A stranger is better than having you push me away for someone else to deal with. Can't you see me?" Takao didn't know what to make of your broken form. You were crying and trembling, he's known you for a little over a year, and how come he didn't know how to comfort you like this? "[Name]- I'm sorry, I don't know-" "Don't be, I'm sorry. Let me cool off and get over myself and we can go back to normal. Just-just let me be for a while." You cut him off, the words barely leaving your lips before you ran in the direction of your house. That was it. You lost Takao forever. -- "Shin-chan, I don't understand what happened, I know I messed up, but I don't know how to fix it." Takao whined from the bench the next day during practice. The team was taking a water break when Takao brought up the topic. He called Midorima after he got home last night and explained everything that happened, but nothing was really resolved. The green-haired male sighed, taking off his glasses to clean them, "I'm surprised [Name] hasn't blown up earlier on you if you still can't understand it." There was a hint of a smile on his face at this. "I get that, I'm dense, but how can I fix it? I can't lose [Name]-chan like this, for something stupid I did." Midorima couldn't help but feel bad at how hurt and bent out of shape Takao looked, "I don't know how I didn't know he liked me- he said he was in love with me." It was a whisper. Midorima sat down beside him, "Really? Are you really going to say that?" "What do you mean?" "It's been so obvious," He sighed, "Everything [Name] does is because he's trying to get your attention in a romantic way, not a friendly way." There was a pause of silence between them before Takao spoke up, "So, like the fact he calls you by your last name when you call him by his first name?" Midorima nodded, "Oh, I just thought that was because he felt more comfortable around me." "Then when something happens in his life, he always calls you first, and the way he looks at you when you look away, and how he only watches you during out games." Midorima connected more dots for him, seeing that Takao wasn't going to understand unless it hit him right in the face. The coach called practice back together, making the two stand up. "You'll figure it out." Midorima said and jogged over to the coach to see what play there were going to practice next. -- The next few days of school, you didn't even try to avoid Takao, just whenever you saw him, or whenever he noticed you, neither of you made the effort to go to the other. Takao didn't come over to your house that weekend, and those days turned into weeks of ignoring each other. It hurt every time you saw him. He was still smiling with his other friends, he still seemed happy, and completely indifferent to you when he met your eye. At least Midorima was keeping up with texting you back, and having short conversations before going to class. That was when you knew your feelings weren't mutual. Because how can he look so unfazed by what happened, while you looked like you dug your way up from hell. Even people you've rarely spoke to were asking if you were ok. You knew what was happening, and you were glad that no one else was catching on. Love was a stupid emotion. Nothing good could come from love you decided. Lust was one thing, like was one thing, but love was it's own thing that nothing could compare to. Romantic love is horrid. -- Life wasn't much different without Takao in it. That was a lie actually. It was different. But, slowly but surely you survived. You were so in love with him, that it was hard, imagining and living your life without him next to you. You may have had a crush on him and he may have not felt the same way, but he was your best friend. Surprisingly, Midorima helped you out along the way. He told you that Takao honestly didn't know what he did wrong, and it made him furious, as well as you. Whenever Takao would ask about you, Midorima always told you and kept you updated. It was sweet. Maybe Takao was right, that you guys were perfect for each other, because Midorima was starting to fill the spot that Takao left behind.   You tried to shift your feelings towards the green-haired giant, but they weren't the same, they felt too forced. It was Kazunari. When you saw Midorima, you saw him.   It was Takao, and then it was no one. You didn't need him romantically in your life anymore. It was going to be ok. You kept telling yourself that once you got over your feelings for Takao, you could find away to love the man your parents would choose for you. -- "I'm home!" You called as you entered your house one Friday. You only had a week until you graduated. Your parents had you meet a few men that were possible people you would marry, but none were official. Oh, and you meant men, all of them were in their mid to late twenties, even though some of them weren't business professionals, they all seemed happy in their line of work, and they were all alphas. There was no response, so you assumed your mom was probably in the back yard in her garden and your dad was late home from work. You toed off your shoes before going to your room to put your things away and change. You hated your school's uniform with a passion, it was the only thing you were happy to leave behind when you graduated. Once you were changed, you headed to the kitchen to only be stopped in the doorway when you saw your parents at the table, along with two other adults you were almost positive were Takao parents. "[Name]," You mother started with a smile, "Good timing, I'm guessing Takao isn't with you?" You shook your head, "Then he should be here soon too, come sit." She said and patted the empty spot between her and your father. You did as she motioned to and sat down next to her, and as soon as you did, you heard the front door open and close. Takao walked into the kitchen, not as startled as you were when he saw everyone. Silently he sat down between his parents, across from you. "I'm guess you're confused why we're all here?" You father asked directed mainly at you, meaning Takao must know what's going on. You shot Takao a look, but he remained passive, not giving you any hint to what was going on, "I'm very confused." "Well," It was Takao's father that spoke up, "Kazunari here came to use yesterday with a very serious question. And because he's still underage, that is why we are here." "I asked my parents and your parents if I can court you." Takao blurted, making himself as well as you blush. Your flustered blush quickly turned to one of anger, but you remained as well composed as you could, "Oh really? And why's that?" Just when you forced yourself to get over him in these past few months, he comes tumbling back in your life like this, to ask for your hand in marriage nonetheless. Takao glanced at his parents before sighing, slumping forwards slightly, "Because you said you loved me," Your parent's gaze shot to you, "And when we stopped talking, I didn't realize how much I cared for you." "But you don't love me." You cut him off. "Well, no-" "Then that's it. I'm not going to say yes to your offer of courtship if you don't feel how I did about you." You cut him off again, shocking everyone in the room. "D-Did?" He stuttered out. You nodded, "I know I didn't make an effort to try to reconcile with you, neither did you," A look of guilt flashed over his face, "I got over my silly crush, and I moved on." Your anger slowly dissipated into an passive look. "I'm sorry Kazu, but I have to decline your offer." "Don't you want to talk about it with him in private for a while [Name]?" You mother asked, you could hear the concern in her voice. You gave her a smile and shook your head, "I'm sure, don't worry." You turned back to Takao and gave him a smile, a real one, "You'll always be my first real love, but I can't force you to marry me just because I love you and you don't love me. It would be wrong." "I could learn to love you more than just my platonic love I have for you." Takao begged, he looked so sad, you felt your heart go out for him. But you shook your head once more, "It wouldn't be the same, I know you won't be able to feel that way about me. Plus I'm older than you, and I have no doubt we can continue our friendship, I'll-I'll be ok too." Your parents looked stunned at you for a moment, obviously not expecting like sort of reaction to come from you. They were expecting you to snatch up the opportunity to have someone you knew court you. Takao sighed again, "Are you sure?" You nodded, a grin wide on your face, "Positive, plus some of the guys my parents have introduced me to are like super hot, so I'll be fine." You teased, surprisingly making everyone laugh. Your mom asked Takao parents if they would like to stay over for dinner while you and Takao headed to your room like any other time he was over. Kakao was lost from you for a moment, and you were so glad it was only for a few months. If you lost him forever, it would have crushed you. -- Even though it was a rough and bumpy road, everything panned out for the most part. Two months after you graduated you and your parents decided on one of the eligible guys they had pick to court you. You thought he was rather attractive, even if he was ten years older than you, and a little rough around the edges, but that meshed well with you. He wasn't one of the most successful one out of the pack, but he was still your favorite. Maybe it was because you found out that his grandfather was the one who forced him to take advantage of your parents invitation. It was cute that he only did this to appease his grandfather, it made it easier for you to be yourself around him than anyone else you met before. His name is Ukai Keishin, and you were surprised that through the midst of everything, you guys actually managed to fall in love with each other, even if he was older than you. Your courtship lasted only half a year before you got married in the fall. Takao was your best man at your modest wedding. Well, it was as modest as you could get with Ukai inviting his entire volleyball club, it was too cute. You still loved Takao, but in a different way now. You supported him wholly when he asked for your advice a year and a half after your marriage, and while you were expecting your first child, how he would ask his girlfriend to marry him. You were so glad you didn't lose him.

[lookwhatilost]

i saw this valentines day ask meme earlier and i wanted to reblog it but i also dnt want people prying on gp and i know nobody will send me anything here bc i have like no followers, so im going to answer it under the cut and if you wanna b #nosy, then you’re at your liberty to do so

also im drunk answering these so theres that

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

lmfao

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

yes, sadly 😪

3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?

unofficially we were on and off over the course of almost 4 years but officially the longest we were together was only a handful of months... but i generally tell people the unofficial version bc i feel like they’d downplay the significance of it otherwise

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

yeah but in the sense that i let good things inside me wither and die when i shouldnt have

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

he’s living with someone else but makes a point of letting me know that he’s still th*rsting over me... it’s rly embarrassing

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

idk for certain but most likely

7: Have you ever cheated?

no

8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?

if i was aware, no, but i feel like i’d be totally possible for me to start going out w someone like that without being aware of that reputation beforehand

9: What's the most important part of a relationship?

your heads need to b in the same place i think... what with priorities, values, etc. i know some people can happily ignore conflicts like that & jst know to never bring them up but i can’t ever picture myself doing that.

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

i’ve never had a “fling” in my life and i dnt intend to

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

if you need space from someone, then it is what it is, but i dnt think i would ever use the term “break” bc it’s too grey. i’ve seen friends. i know what’s up.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

harry’s the only person ive been with in any capacity

13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

a lot but i think i would say, like, letting it go on for as long as it did bc i thought i didn’t have anything else going for me. granted, i didn’t, but sometimes it’s better to be invested in an ex that you aren’t speaking to, than be invested in a relationship that’s dragging you down

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

never tbh sex is dumb as shit

15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?

fuck no

16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?

i believe you can instantly recognize that you connect to another person but that’s not, like, love lmfao

17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?

yeah but i’ve no interest in that

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

in a relationship i dnt think i would interpret anything as an objective deal breaker aside from the Big Shit like cheating etc. but if i was considering dating someone i think the biggest deal breaker would be political differences.

19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?

i’ll let you know when i figure it out

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

no

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

under the right circumstances, sure

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

i would encourage them to. i personally wouldn’t want to get into a romantic relationship that didn’t already have the foundation of a strong platonic one

23: How many relationships have you had?

one

24: Do you think love can last forever?

no but i dnt think there’s anything wrong with that either

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

absolutely not

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?

my parents are so out of touch w who i am that their approval or objection carries no weight beyond that so... no

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

all advice is useless. conclusions have no meaning unless you draw them yourself. if i could go back in time, i would kill hitler.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

yes but personally ive no interest in one

29: What do you notice first about another person?

this is gnna sound dumb but whether they have a threatening vibe to them or not. for context: i work in service

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

i’m bisexual but i dnt see my attraction to men as anything more than begrudging & a nuisance

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

not in principle, but i have a lot of mental illnesses myself, and if i was in a position where my mental disorders and my partner’s were jst endlessly feeding off of one another... yeah that would definitely upset me

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

harry was definitely emotionally abusive to me at times but he was jst stupid tbh and retrospectively i dnt consider it to be abusive. jst, like, it was a very bad dynamic and it coaxed shitty things out of both of us

33: Do you want to get married one day?

not rly

34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?

i wouldnt

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

easily

36: Are you still a virgin?

i wish

37: What's more important: Looks or personality?

personality obvi but physical attraction still needs to be there lmfao

38: Do you enjoy love films?

no they’re bad

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

ive gotten roses twice

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

what even is that

41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?

i dnt have a specific vision but it would involve day drinking lmfao

42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?

yeah. 3/10 tbh.

43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?

it’s a balancing act! ive been guilty of putting my friendships on the back burner in favor of romantic relationships and i dnt want to do that again!

44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?

not anymore

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

this is a loaded question bc all my friends follow this... if i say yes, it’s awkward. if i say no they’ll be like “well why the fuck not?”

46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?

have people i liked romantically not returned my feelings? yes. have i gotten all indignant and entitled abt it? i’d like to think not.

47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?

literally i can’t even think of any

48: What's your favorite love song?

momentarily? knock you down by keri hilson. it’s cute & a throwback

49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

doubt it

50: If you're single, why do you think you are?

lack of proximity to available people that i’m compatible with, the fact that i have standards

51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?

poor & nice... no shit sherlock

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

all dating advice is a shout into the void. i dnt bother

53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?

i think exposure to that kind of stuff hits on a very real insecurity that stems from a rly long pattern of being mistreated in my romantic endeavors, but it’s not jealousy lmfao it’s something much more insidious than that... like i feel like im being taunted for having extremely severe emotional trauma related to that and it’s rly not a can of worms i want to open

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?

it’s not like important-important, but suffice to say, i would be suspicious of someone who was vehemently against it

55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?

i’m trying to learn there’s nothing shameful abt being attached to the people you care abt, so yes & no

56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?

yeah but i dnt feel particularly bad abt it either

57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

when you’re suicidal you dnt care much for what is or isnt silly, let’s be real

58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?

ideally my relationships dnt have a dynamic like that

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?

i have a weird fixation on dates and remember significant ones from, like, 10 years ago. february 9th 2009 was a big one, actually. so no i generally dnt forget dates unless i didnt commit them to memory in the first place

60: What's your opinion on open relationships?

stupid

61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?

my family isnt important to me

62: How do you define "cheating"?

doing anything #physical with someone other than yr partner, or like, carrying out any sort of emotional relationship w someone you aren’t dating (like you’re telling someone else that you love them & wanna get w them or whatever)... some of it is rly cut n dry but other times its very, well, grey

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

i mean it’s not but like... holy shit dude you’re not 15 anymore.

64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?

who dznt?

65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?

probably. who knows. i cant believe answering this ate up almost a whole hour

[konekotakuchan]

I got tagged to do this so here! If you want to do it too just copy and paste.

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

-No? I'm in a relationship

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

- Yeah

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? -Several years on and off

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

-Kinda I dropped some interests and hobbies in order to spend more time with him

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

-Im friends with most if them on Facebook but I dont really talk to them. I dont hate any of them except one. I dont hate him but I'm not ready to really be friends lol

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

-Yep

7: Have you ever cheated?

-Yep in like high school

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating?

- maybe if I'm a sucker but I couldnt handle that and the relationship wouldn't last

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship?

- a lot of things really. there's not one thing that I could say is "important". Communication is important. Not like asking permission but like hey just heads up going to so and so later. It just helps making the relationship feel like a team instead if two individuals living thier lives separately and just sleeping in the same bed. Also knowing each others love language and what their needs are.

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

-Im more of a serious person

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

-I dont really believe in breaking up but I do believe in space.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

-Like 3?

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

-sticking up for myself or not leaving sooner. Tal

-lking about my issues

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

-i dunno there are lots of variables.

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”?

-uhhh I dunno.

16: Do you believe in “love" at first sight?

-not really

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet?

-mmm maybe I dunno

-

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

-Yelling and throwing things or breaking things anything thats a little violent. I cant handle that.

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship?

-I think when you enjoy life without them around more than when you are with them.

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

-Yeah

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

-Depends

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

-yeah

23: How many relationships have you had?

-lol I'm not counting

24: Do you think love can last forever?

-yeah

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

-Uhm I dunno like say my SO cheated I'm not gonn stay with them cuz I love them.

-

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of?

-lol no

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

- Dont ever feel like you need to do things and act a certain way to please your SO. If it's meant to work out it will.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

-Depends. I cant see myself in one.

29: What do you notice first about another person?

-posture, hair

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

-Im pansexual. I've known this since I was about 4th grade at least.

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

-nope

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

-Yeah

33: Do you want to get married one day?

-I dunno

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed?

-Stupid

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

-Yeah theres more than just sex and other ways to be intimate.

36: Are you still a virgin?

-no lol 10 Yeard too late

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? personality but of course looks have a role.

38: Do you enjoy love films?

-yep

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

-yeah its been as long time since I last gotten flowers. I kinda miss working at safeway I'd get them quite often.

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

-yeah?

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”?

-As long as I didnt have to choose a single thing it would be perfect

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”?

-yeah

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends?

-relationship with both are important. I'm definitely the type to put my boyfriend over my friends. Not on purpose. I just get really involved with them and wanna spend all my time with them.

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic"?

-no but I definitely like it even if it makes me a little uncomfy.

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

-uhhh I guess lol

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”?  

-lol once

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite?

-i dont have one lol

48: What’s your favorite love song?

-i dont know lol

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

-Yeah 🤷🏻‍♀️

50: If you’re single, why do you think are?

-no single lol

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy?

- poor nice guy? Unless hes like a sugar daddy? Lol

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

-nope lol

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single?

-nah

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?

-I mean it's not important but I did date someone who refused to "make it official" and would never post anything about us. Definitely messed me up so I personally like seeing it and I enjoy getting tagged in the posts and what not. It kinda makes me feel like they are proud to be my SO and not ashamed or something idk.

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”?

-Lately I'm not too much of a cuddler kind of clingy. I feel my anxiety build up for some reason, but I'm totally clingy and jealous. I need to feel like your world and have like 90% of your attention.

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? -eh..i wouldn't put it like that, but yeah totally lol

57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

-I wouldn't say silly, but I can see how it can be like the breaking point if there are lots of other things going on?

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship?

-lol with adulting and in life right now I feel Dom but preferably sub. I need to feel taken care of though to be able to slip into my sub self properly to really enjoy it.

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary?

-lol for a second every now and then.

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships?

-Im open to it lol. I'm not sure if I can handle it but maybe with the right person(s). I've seen it work great for others.

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family?

-family isnt really important to me. I'm not gonna answer this

62: How do you define “cheating”?

-Doing something behind that persons back that they wouldn't approve of. Whether it be flirting with someone else, giving someone else more attention than your SO. Basically if you are choosing someone else over your SO. Of course this could all be okay if its talked about before and its consensual in a poly or open relationship.

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

-yeah I'll make fun but its whatever.

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated?

-it's not really my fav holiday but I enjoy it.

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”?

-not at the moment.

[eliminativism]

You made a lot of incorrect assumptions about me, so I'm going to go ahead and outright say that you are a douchebag, I don't appreciate you, and people like you are the reason gays and trans people are being FORCED into positions they don't agree with. The harder you push people to accept something, the more they fight back against it - I CANT SAY I'M TRANS WITHOUT PEOPLE ASSUMING I'M A RADICAL FEMINIST LEFTIST IMBECILE LIKE YOU! FUCK YOU!

Lol, after making a post to me which was basically entirely personal attacks and made-up bullshit after I merely pointed out some basic facts, and now you accuse me of making incorrect assumptions about you?

The story so far:

A 15 year old teen was abbandoned by her mom and decided to live on her own after her father went to jail. After suffering from abuse by her parents for her sexuality, she decided to finally go through an important medical procedure after she threw off the yoke of her parents with the help of school councillors, activists and doctors.

Some right-wing nut tries to paint this as the school and Teh evul Gayz TM basically kidnapping her from her parent’s house and forcing drugs down her throat.

I come up to say that reports indicate this person has been consistently trans for her entire life and there is no evidence of wrongdoing towards her by staff or school except for the lack of the formal emancipation from her neglectful parents which would have avoided the legal steps her mother took in order to get some money out of the system for not respecting her rights as a parent - after she didn’t give a shit about her daughter for almost three years…

Boneskulllzy: *barges in through the door* “STOP JUSTIFYING CHILD ABUSE YOU ARE A TERRIBLE HUMAN BEING WRRAAAAAAGH MY KIDS WILL NEVER LEARN WHAT SEX IS IN MY HOUSE HUUUUAARGGGG”

Well, what the fuck should I conclude about you? Hm?

Now to tell you a few basic facts again. I am a very strong skeptic of feminist theory and critic of feminism - my blog has been mostly an antifeminist blog since its existance. Like, I already told you about researching something a little bit before opening your stupid shitmouth.

People would probably assume that you are a radical feminist less often if you didn’t talk out of your ass about topics you have no clue about.

Come back with a humility in your attitude and the apologies you owe me for attacking me for no reason and lying about the story, you pathetic and impolite nuisance, or don’t bother me again.

[skiasurveys]

im fkn bored man

1: Do you have a crush at the moment? well im dating someone :3

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? yes just once and that is now

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? the one i am in right now which is 1 year as of may 10th

4: Have you ever changed for someone? yeah a few people

5: How is your relationship with your ex? well  i just deleted my one ex off fb because his posts annoy the fuck outta me and i didnt need him on there! My other ex sometimes tries to talk to me but thats really it. im not friends with any of my exes.

6: Have you ever been cheated on? not that i know of

7: Have you ever cheated? no 

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating? idk thats hard because i dont like to believe rumors and so i would have to know him i guess. If i was told by everyone he was a cheater then i would probably not date him. 

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship? companionship, trust, honesty, affection, happiness, empathy 

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? serious. flings are pointless. 

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? no because i think breaks are basically just where youre not dating but you guys arent completely broken up yet.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?   by hook up you mean fucka  random stranger? none. 

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?  saying i love you way too soon especially when i didnt mean it, dating someone because everyone else thinks i should. I regret doing things because i thought i knew everyone wanted too. example was my one ex i didnt like really and i only dated him because eveyrone thought he was great..

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?  kids?...KIDS???

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”?  im bias because my bf is 6 years older than me but i do believe it is just a number UNLESS the person is like 15 dating a 22 yr old then thats fucking weird. But if youre both consenting adults then whatever. except for dudes who are like 35 dating 18 year olds thas just fucking weird to me.

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”?  no. not love thats lust. 

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? I mean yeah, if you talk all the time, everyday, share your secrets, then yeah. some of my greasts friendships were online, but i cant do online dating because i need to be with them. I did date someone online once and that was just pointless. Unless you meet from online and then can see them every couplemonths ( like ldr). but yeah idk i understand i over answered the question lmao

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?  Lying to me, cheating, doing illegal shit ( like hardcore stuff...), if you hit me..and if you hate my friends for no reason..

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? you just know. Usually if you lose feelings, or they just keep fucking up your life and or if you know youre just not compatible anymore..

20: Are you currently in a relationship? yeah! its our one year in may! 05.10.16

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? some can, if you can be mature adults. Unless you were super serious and then something happened! It all really depends on the relationship. I was friends with some of my exes but they turned to shit when i started to date Connor they got all jealous and some got super creepy wanting to know about our sexual life..like wtf..

22: Do you think people should date their friends? yeah but make sure they are on the same page.. but i also believe your significant other should be your best friend ^_^ 

23: How many relationships have you had? 4 including the one I am in now.

24: Do you think love can last forever?it can if you can work at it. 

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things? not everything.

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? no because my sister doesnt like my bf but i honestly dont care. Unless they had like actual valid reasons like if he were to abuse me which he obvs isnt.

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? Dont date someone because they like you. Dont date someone because they “look” nice. Dont date them because everyone else thinks they are awesome. and finally dont say I love you until you mean it!

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work? yeah. I did one once, andit took lots of trust but in the long run was pointless. I am in one now but its temporary hes back next month!

29: What do you notice first about another person? Hair and teeth. and for dudes it can be also if they have facial hair and have nice arms lmaoooo.

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? Straight as fuck

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness? No because I already do and I know my bf has depression even tho he tries to self medicate with weed smh.

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? verbally.

33: Do you want to get married one day? Yeah. One day.

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed? I just think it is dumb because one i dont need his name tattooed on me..two..like you never know they could not work out and then its awkward.

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?  not rly i need that physical touch BUT i will respect their wishes if theyre not ready, theyre not ready.

36: Are you still a virgin? Nope

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? BOTH. 

38: Do you enjoy love films? yes but i dont watch them with my bf

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? yes

40: Have you ever had a valentine? yes

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”?   where we both are connecting well and having fun. I dont need a fancy ass dinner.I rather have fun and connect well than have a sit down dinner and it be awkward.

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? yeah

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? Both. My boyfriend is my friend too so cmon. I would never ditch my bf for my friends and i wouldnt ditch my friends for my bf. Unless there was a legit reason

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? i try to be

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?  my bf is my friend so

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”? no

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite?  dont know. dont care.

48: What’s your favorite love song?  I can’t help falling in love with you

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Yes. It sucks but sometimes you have too. I broke up with my ex like 2 years ago because he wasnt rly a good bf and I know he loved me a lot but He just wasnt what I want. He also was very bad at communication! He didnt talk to me for also 2 months LMAO so I was like bye bitch and Yeah he was out working but i dont know it was pointless. Ldr, and i didnt rly find him that attractive anymore and we didnt conenct. He tries to still talk but its like no honey..lmao

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are?  n/a

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy? poor but nice.

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?  I try to 

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single?  I do when im single cus you want to be with someone.

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)? i like it but connor doesnt rly use fb so were not rly facebook offical, and i mean that doesnt mean shit. I do say im in a relatonship tho, I aint gonna lie. But he doesnt rly use fb except for messaging.

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”? Clingy I think. its my anxiety disorder, i get nervous they dont want me around and so i get so clingy and I also love them alot..

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? no but if i did i would feel awful. Unless I was doing it out of good heart ( like if someone was being abused).

57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?   no suicide is never silly.

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship?  submissive.

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary?  no

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships?  i just think theyre stupid. But if you both into that, whatever.. but i just dont see that as a relationship..thats jsut me tho.. 

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family?  stop asking this shit. Makes me guilty. 

62: How do you define “cheating”?  If you have to hide it.. if youre kissing..flirting..touching..

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate? No just dont rly tell me about it, because i dont care. but i watch porn too. it would jsut annoy me if he was like swooning over porn stars or watching it more than fucking me.

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated?  yes. its kinda stupid. you dont need ONE day to show you care.

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”?  hard core