#i cannot breathe without them

[veniceflytrap]

“i will walk into hell gladly knowing i’ve held heaven in my hands.”

[dirtytransmasc]

I think I need MelVik connecting when Viktor was on his sick bed. they had been amicable before, maybe a little more than that due to their connection through Jayce and her presence around Hextech and such. but they weren't entirely friends. not yet.

and she goes to see him. perhaps she feels a tinge of guilt at assuming the worst about Jayce, or her bleeding heart makes her feel responsible for keeping Jayce out of the lab when Viktor had needed him. maybe Jayce needs to step out for a moment, and she soothes his worry by promising to sit with Viktor. maybe she just wants to be closer to the man that's so painfully important to the one she loves, wants to befriend him, wants to know him, all before it's far too late.

maybe it's a little bit of each.

but she goes to see him. she sits in the chair that Jayce has nearly worn a hole through, and keeps a semi-awkward distance between them, not knowing what is too close and too far.

this man is dying. he is dying and he has accepted that. he looks like a corpse. cold emanates off of him. he is something she doesn't fully understand.

she doesn't know how to approach.

but she does.

she greets softly and speaks softly and hesitates to touch, but rests a hand over Viktor's and feels how cold he is, even as a sickly warmth brews in his bones, leeching the warmth from his skin and the energy from his body.

he seems surprised she's there. it feels out of place. like the song and dance of their dynamic has shifted, and now he needs to relearn the steps. and now this is a dance of two, not three.

she will tell Viktor, in enough detail to be understood and not enough to be awkward, where Jayce was. because it feels right to confess. it's not an apology, but the avoidance of keeping something like a secret from a dying man.

Viktor will probably just nod and say something self deprecating, because what else do you say when your body is already making a joke of itself? before assuring her that Jayce is not his keeper, that she is not to blame, but even that comes off as some twisted attempt at humor. sue him for being sardonic as he lay dying.

but unlike Jayce, who will cringe at the jokes, she will hide a smile behind her fingers, muffling a soft, if not saddened, chuckle in her palm.

Viktor's eyes will light up ever so slightly.

she'll feel awkward once more. should she have laughed? was this playing into a complex? was this right of her?

Viktor will smile weakly.

she'll feel a little less awkward.

she will realize Viktor needs someone to laugh with. that Jayce, bless his soul, cannot be that person for Viktor. his worry has brewed too long. it's too strong.

but maybe a fresh face like Mel's can be there to smile when Jayce cannot. will laugh when Jayce cannot. can make cheeky jokes and pokes and prods.

the three fit together like 3 pieces of 3 broken puzzles. they fit together, not perfectly, but they fit, and create a finished object, even if off kilter her and uneven there. but it's ok, they're making due.

[hotvintagepoll]

I love these polls. But this feels like a weird and uncomfortable time to continue them. While we are in the process of deciding whether or not to give fascism unlimited power in the greatest military power currently on the planet, these posts feel uncomfortably out of touch with the existential threat facing all of humanity. I cannot enjoy voting in silly polls when I know that all of humankind faces the threat of extermination.

When we can return to a less horrifying reality, I would enjoy revisiting these polls. At the moment, to continue them feels like a cruel celebration of privilege from those who are insulated from the most extreme consequences of current proposed policies. It is hard to think of what level of inhumanity is necessary to continue laughing in the face of so much world-wide horror.

Of course you don't have to stay, and I won't begrudge you at all for going. But there's one point of yours here I feel is worth discussing, and it's your last one: laughing in the face of world-wide horror.

There is a difference between laughing at horrifying things and taking a break to laugh. In a world that is horrifying—and, to be honest, has been horrifying since this blog began, and long before then, and will be after it's done—you need to laugh to keep your endurance. I mean that every step of the way. You will not be able to keep fighting for the people who need your help, including yourself, if you don't give yourself a break and let yourself have joy and silliness in little dollops on the regular.

In my real life, when I'm not posting hot silly people on the hot silly people blog, I try to find ways to help change the world for the better. I've been trying for a while. And one of the key things I've learned in that while is that having a little fun and silliness does not dilute the work of making the world better—it gives you the fuel to keep doing it. Your human brain and body need a muchness. They need joy and sorrow and work and rest and laughter to keep going—and before you say, that's a privilege! yes, in today's broken world it often is. It should not be one. It is a right. You have the right to find spots of joy, silliness, time off from the world.

Stuff sucks right now, but taking ten minutes off to let yourself rest is not going to contribute to the end of the world. We need to rest and laugh if we want to keep going. I've always said this is a silly blog, and I maintain that yes! it is silly, it is pointless, this is nothing big at all. Nothing here has any consequence. And that can be a small good thing at the end of the day. It doesn't mean the big stuff doesn't matter if we have the small stuff too. We can have both. We need both.

I hope you find peace, wherever you are.

[artigas]

it’s absolutely unfathomable that billionaires are using their wealth to dismantle democracy, if I was the richest man on the planet I’d simply send Pedro Pascal and Paul Mescal a video camera and a blank check

[puppppppppy]

i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you

[wildsaltair]

y’all don’t understand I need to BITE his ribcage

[itwoodbeprefect]

stoic illiterate unwilling assassin deeply in love with unfailingly kind rich sad gay man almost stabs his crush's brother because the brother cares so much and so genuinely for the gay man that he searched assassin's room out of worry and found knives and a mysterious letter before being interrupted by the assassin who then does not want to show him the letter which seems incredibly suspicious, only for a later scene (after the gay man interrupts them and thus stops any escalation from happening) to quietly reveal that the very sus letter in possession of this illiterate assassin is not in fact a sign he's lying about being illiterate.... it's just two pages of him practicing the gay man's name over and over in neatly spaced lines...... a reveal which he was going to STAB a man over because he doesn't know that the gay man's brother knows the man is gay and loves him with his whole heart and would never ever do anything to hurt him........ i will never get over this, how could i ever get over this, everything else ever is going to be downhill from here

[pilonciillo]

lol didn’t think someone giving money would give me anxiety

[criiitter]

in anticipation for totk i have made a sticker sheet of some of my bestest little korok friends

[slashthrashandcrash]

save me girl who's secretly obsessed with you asmr. girl who's secretly obsessed with you asmr save me.

[mcalhenwrites]

I'm gonna be okay, right? After all this shit that's hitting my life right now, it's gonna be okay? It's gonna end eventually, right, like in a good way, not the "I'm dead so ofc it's over" way? I'm gonna go write now, to ignore that my life is blowing up and I have no spoons left trying to patch up all the holes. Sometimes the ship is just sinking, and you can't do anything but go down with it, I guess. I can't patch iceberg-sized damage up with paper towels, and that's what I feel like I'm always having to do. I'm not sure how to explain how sad I am, but I was stupid to hope, and I worry I'm still stupid to hope. I worry I'm worthless and refuse to see it, and the world keeps pounding it into my head that I deserve nothing, no matter how hard I work.

[aoitakumi8148]

...𝓘𝓽 𝓕𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓼 𝓛𝓲𝓴𝓮 𝓢𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓘𝓷𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝓜𝓮 𝓗𝓪𝓼 𝓓𝓲𝓮𝓭 𝓐𝓼 𝓦𝓮𝓵𝓵...

[phuuca]

No actually, I cannot shut the fuck up about the detailed analysis I did on how every housewarden and upperclassman has failed their freshmen in some way, shape, or form.

[vmures]

If you've done something horrific and want to apologize, you might want to avoid stating you are now a martyr. Kind of negates the apology by showing you aren't actually sorry for harming people, you're just sorry that others in your in group are mad at you for it.

It's also important to realize that no one owes you forgiveness for your actions. You have to do the work--understand why what you did was wrong, get help to deal why you behaved the way you did, and work to be a better person in the future.

None of it is easy, and you will likely have to deal with a whole lot of returned ugliness because of your actions. Are those people in the right to be just as ugly and awful as you, probably not. But they're just as human as you and reacting from a place of pain and trauma. Hopefully, they too will learn that lashing out is not the best action and that it creates a vicious cycle of ugliness. But painting yourself as the victim when you were the initial bad actor...looks really awful and strongly invalidates your apology.

Grace is one of the hardest things to offer when one is hurt and upset. Asking for it when your apology comes across as insincere and self serving...is not the greatest idea.

[maiaacchiato]

thinking thoughts

[iwannascreameurekaa]

Anyone else ever get really mad when the username that you use EVERYWHERE is taken by some else... it's not that serious but it is to ME

we're gonna fight for it GIVE ME ITTT NOWW 😾😾