#i can touch my toes
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Rook being a very physically touchy person and Lucanis avoiding touch at all costs from built up trauma from childhood, his work as a Crow, and the Ossuary. Them always asking for Lucanis' permission to touch him, and before Tearstone Island, they hug him and he still flinches but he holds them tight
As Rook is taken into the Regret prison and they see a vision of Lucanis' body on the ground, they scream his name out of concern and fear but all Lucanis hears is them screaming for him to help, and then they're gone. They're gone. He thinks they were screaming his name, begging him to save them and now they're gone.
Weeks into Rook being taken into the Regret prison and now a man who couldn't be touched without reflexively drawing a blade is craving the warmth of his partner who he thinks he'll never see again
Lucanis pulling Rook out of the prison, knowing it's them right away because of their hands. He missed their hands, he missed their touch, he missed their warmth, he missed them.
When Rook gets back, Lucanis' touch is slow and soft, almost unbelieving. Weeks of stress and torture and pain and guilt and regret, and now they're here. Once they're finally together, he feels as though the world is in their arms and if killing a god is the only way to stay there, he will do what a Crow does best and fulfill this contract
#dragon age#the veilguard spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#lucanis x rook#lucanis romance#rookanis#and he gets them screaming his name in a *different* way you know what I- (is shot)#just thinking about how my Rook cant go to sleep with touching her partner in some form#doesnt matter if its a toe a shoulder an elbow#as long as she has some sort of contact with her partner's body she can sleep well#not sure how i feel about that last line :/#I'll find something better later#probably#maybe
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ATTENTION! this is considered the WORST CRIME YOU COULD COMMIT. to MY BOSS.
(a supervisor just told me that 1) you are not allowed to put your pantslegs into your shoes because it will make our boss scream and cry and throw up for some reason, and 2) we are apparently not allowed to wear boots. to work. he told me this because he was reprimanded for the same crime)
so what I'm thinking is I'll start wearing my bright pink velvet docs to work. because they're not boots thankfully ❤️
#make it make sense. mind you there is No dress code apart from Wear The Ugly Uniform#they wouldn't even know these are boots if i didn't put my pants in them. which i have to because if the inside of these touch my bare legs#i'm killing myself faster than you can blink#also i've been doing this for weeks now lol#i hope they'll appreciate the extremely pink ones more 🤞#all the other shoes appropriate for summer have like. holes in them. and one pair really rubs on my left little toe :(#rayrambles
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in pain :/
#i say things sometimes#my fucking achilles tendon thing man#it hates me#and also vitamins hate me apparently#since this is all “because i’m deficient”#kinda hate this#i’ve been really trying to get more into the physical side of marching band#and i can do it! i can touch my toes for the first time in years! planking and running are easier by a tiiiiiiiny bit!!#but man. something is making me get very very very faint when i do the most basic thing that even if i’m able to do a lap or a plank#for the required amount of time#i need so much rest time after that#i walked up the stairs like. five minutes ago#and my heart is still pounding#motherfucker#i KNOW my stamina is improving but SOMETHING is affecting it#probably the vyvance but vyvance is love vyvance is life vyvance made me happy again
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you know how in many couples, ideal thermal equilibrium is achieved by one party acting as a source, and the other as a sink
.... so a red draconic sorcerer with primarily (force- and) fire-related powers probably runs hotter in general than someone who is quite literally undead huh
(i'm just thinking a lot about how nice Iona being always perfectly toasty warm must feel to Astarion after two centuries of -in my hc at least- always being just slightly cold. at least once they fall into being comfortable with physical affection)
(she'll hold and rub the icy tips of his ears with her warm lil mitts until they turn pink)
(breathe a warm lil kiss on the tip of his cold nose)
(and she never much enjoyed cuddling or prolonged physical contact because with warm-blooded creatures, she overheated quickly, but having an icepack-lizard for a boyfriend actually makes it pretty much perfect)
(he's the little spoon)
(and the one with his head on her chest)
(it's the Boobsnuggle: great for optimal heat distribution, tangling legs comfortably, AND sneakily listening to her heartbeat)
(plus it's. it's a faceful of excellent tits that's a win-win-win)
(her touch feels like sunlight okay let me have this)
#oc: iona raedir#squirrel plays bg3#there is that scene in the 101 dalmatians cartoon that i keep thinking about#when one of the puppies is saying like....#“i'm tired. and i'm hungry. and my tail is froze. and my nose is froze. and my ears are froze. and my toes are froze.”#that's what i hear when i picture Astarion draping himself over his heatpack girlfriend's back with a world-weary sigh#yes realistically he's not TOTALLY cold this is not Twilight#but nobody can convince me that his skin wouldn't be at least slightly too cool to the touch#or that this is not cute as hell
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curled up on soft clean blankets and laundry btw 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
#loser.txt#curled up in a soft pile imaginging cybertronian cuddle pile and no one can stop me#rumbles even here but not cuddles up w me cus i no let him lay cus he gots flea meds today and it gives me a rash if it touches me#but hes close and purrin lols#feel free to join brt plenty of laundry to go aroubd lmao#srry im not around much im just wallowing in delusions and despair and such#my toe is still broke as hell and its bothering me too nnf grrr
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i feel so normal today and that's why I can't quit taekwondo
#crazy how life is worth living if you just exercise#i was pushing myself too hard re:flexibility and mobility tho so i want to be patient#its huge that i can touch my toes and am so close to doing side splits. i have to remember where i came from#i may never get a 180 side kick and thats ok
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as a kid, I was really good at the sit and reach during gym class. now? I'm an adult with diagnosed hypermobile joint problems
#hypermobility#disabled#chronic pain#i loved getting the highest score for this#now i can barely touch my toes#oh how the turns have tabled
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bonding with miss kitty to get her more chill to hang out with me
pros: kitty in my room
cons: she doesnt like my bed or anything else i have to hold her [currently typing with her sitting on my lap/posture encouragement pillow]
#some shit#maam. maam can u not eat ur toes while im blogging.#i was skriting her bald but (funny texture) but she musta wanted me to stop so now her head is directly in the way of my kb and track pad#LUCKY. i can touch type. but the general pose is a little....
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10 Happy Things
May 11, 2024
Slept most of the day let's gooo
My bed and clothes are so warm and cozy
Called my mom and apparently she was out with people but she stepped outside to talk to me for a bit before going back to them and just feeling very very loved
My mom called me back and I talked to my sisters for nearly two hours hwjoiegdjkl we're just absolute nerds the lot of us
The Bible Plan I've been doing these past few days is just re-looking at everything from the basis of just get right with God, are you following Jesus and it's been very comforting to have that reminder like it is relational, it is supposed to be a delightful life we're living, there's no stress at all about doing x or y and if you're supposed to, it will not be anything but good
I can't really move my toes individually (except the ones at the ends) and I think it's kinda cute. They're a pack. They're friends. Do Not Separate.
The Tim Horton's White Hot Chocolate is so insanely good
Dungeon Meshi is such a good manga broooo
There are so many joys that I don't think I'll run out of them, and isn't that just the most delightful thing ever?
When I started this list I was feeling a little tired but now I'm quite happy and excited!! I'm so grateful to Katie for getting me into this, and my friends who also do stuff like this
#5 happy things#i don't know why but sometimes i feel a bit silly posting these online bc they're always so personal#like my awesome mom and my weird toes and my religious leanings - i know none of it is very relateable#but i think we're all allowed to be a little selfish in our joy and it's little hurt to see someone else's pleasure i hope#i got my period last night and was as usual quite unwell physically but oh what a delight it was otherwise#i went through the little routine i tend to go through with my mom of like dragging over a chair to lay on while in the bathroom#and setting up the trash can and such nearby#and i missed my mom and thought about calling her and i didn't bc it was like 3am though i did immediately today hehe#but i just thought it was really so incredible to have a mom who i wanted to call when i was ill. who i could call anytime i wanted#how rare is that? how wonderful is that? it touched me so much that all the physical pain felt worth it for the proper knowing of that love#i was thinking about all the good things i've been given - my house and bed and blankets and covers and clothes#and as i was praying i was also thinking that this was what my dad taught me and how he comforted me#and when he prayed for me or tells me he prays for me that's how i know he loves me more than i could know#there are a lot of my joys i think are embarrassing but to be treasured isn't one of them. that one's just pure thankfulness#i know i'm quite spoiled and young and silly in many ways and i'm so thankful for it. i hope i can love others even a fraction as i've been#knowing full well that i'll always be in debt to the goodness of the world and the kindness it unceasingly gives me
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the thing about "just do exercise" as a solution to disability is that, like, i do have to admit sometimes it's genuine, especially with mental health stuff i've found getting out of the house has been really good for me on that front and i can't deny that.
but on the flip side, it actively makes my physical disability worse on some days to exercise, the strain it puts on my leg leaves it in pain for the rest of the day or sometimes the day after and a lot of the time i'll get home completely exhausted even if i enjoyed the walk despite that. i've been getting out for casual strolls and longer hikes more as of this year and even if i've seen the mental benefits, the physical ones i have not seen, and only ended up suffering more for it.
so, i don't know. i have a very specific disability that gets one of those generic muscle disorder diagnoses so maybe this only applies to me, but i think if you give regular exercise at least a solid few weeks and it is just causing more pain and fatigue then its worth telling your doctor to shut the fuck up (if you can).
#and i want to be clear i do genuinely enjoy walks. theyre fun. theres a lot of nice things outside to look at and touch and smell#it is just a painful exercise with not a lot if at all health benefit some days and it upsets me as a one size fits all solution#i can do a million walks and a million pushups and it will not make my toe muscles magically work
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OC rumor: Flower cant touch their toes
( Coming from someone who can't reach theirs, this was the first thing I thought of because I fell over trying to do it this morning )
This is sadly incorrect
Flower can touch their toes. They can also do a back flip and the splits
How ever they can not do a front flip or a cartwheel
#reader is flexy#i can do none of those things#except touch my toes but thats just cause i am hyper mobile#reader is a boxer she didnt just bulk out she learned flexibly as well
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I know it's an unrealistic goal
To see the glass always half full
I'm no stranger to succumbing
To the hopelessness spiral
I just want to remind myself
How much is wonderful
And how motherfucking lame it is to always be
Hating stuff
Focused on the way life sucks
There's an awful lot to love
Think I've had enough
Hating stuff
#I like eating applesauce and cheese#like drinking different types of tea#like when I get recommendations of young adult books I should read#like having good meaningful sex#like having good meaningless sex#like getting told by pretty people that they like the way I dress#really into making stupid jokes#really into putting down my phone#really into British tv shows#really into yoga practice flows#really proud that I can touch my toes#really proud of how much I’ve grown#Spotify#ian mcconnell
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i would like to be tall enough so that my feet actually touch the floor when i sit on this stool
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im so glad i started doing yoga i ache 24/7 now but in such a nice way
#even after just a week i can feel that im getting a bit more flexible and everything. i hope i can touch my toes again soon lol it is so#embarrassing that i havent been able to do that since i was like 10
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If my pussy was as tight as my hamstrings It'd be able to de-glove a woman's dick
#just did my first workout/stretch in like two years#since I'm six weeks post surgery and can do that now#and hoo boy my hammies are in bad shape#cant even get perpendicular while trying to touch my toes while on the mat#stamina is still in decent shape though#so I got through the workout#barely but I did#so I'm better off than when I stopped exercising at all between graduating high school and graduating college
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I'm gonna have to make my cuddle corner extra cozy tonight bc my heart hurts so bad. I hope I have nice dreams tonight. I hope my pets are in my dreams
#rambling#my cuddle corner is where my wall meets my bed and where all the big stuffed animals are#so when im not scared anymore i put my back to my door and snuggle all of them at once so they can watch my dreams#and see how much i love them#i like it when a stuffed animal is touching me everywhere. head to toe. they like it too
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