#i can search my local library by subject too

[lizard-reads-the-world]

Searching WorldCat by subject. This is insanely helpful, why haven't I done this before?

Filtered by language, fiction, ebook. I have to figure out where to access any one book, but finding a list is usually the biggest challenge.

[stargazedwinchester]

Telephone | Sam Winchester #01

I actually wrote this 4 (yes 4) years ago, but I've been thinking about redoing it a little bit and republishing it, hopefully its a little better and everyone enjoys it!

I also have this on Wattpad, link here

Part 2 here

-

Your local library was quiet, yet soft, mumbled words came from all directions at any given time. It was a good quiet, though. So comfortable and calming. You browsed the fiction area looking for information on witches, their spells and origin. Your parents were outlining a mammoth-sized hunt at a rather large cabin in the deep forests of Connecticut.

You were new to this whole thing, but your parents had been hunting their whole lives, they knew letting you grow up in a world where you won't know whether your parents will come back from "work" alive or not was no life to live. As they were careful, they had many hunter friends who would go with one of your parents on a hunt, while the other can look after you without leaving you alone. At the age of 13, your parents asked you if you wanted to join them on your first hunt in Nashville. Of course, you agreed.

You found a witch mythology book in the fiction category, you slid it out of its slot, and managed to pick it up with one hand. You tossed the book a little higher so you could reach your right arm underneath it. It was a heavy book, almost the size of A3 paper. The spine of the book had silver embedded leaves, almost vine-like crawling up the side. The front held a cauldron with three witches gathering around it, the background a deep, crimson velvet red. The title read 'Witch Mythology: Spellbinds and Myths'. You were so captivated by the intricate detail of the book, when at the last minute, you noticed someone on the right, searching for a book. You jump and step back.

"Sorry. I almost bumped into you." You apologise, still remaining quiet. The guy turns around to face you, his grey, almost blue eyes glance into yours. He smiles and looks down at the floor, before returning his eyes back to yours. "It's okay, don't worry." He gives a reassuring smirk, and you smile back. "What are you looking for? I practically live here, so I know where everything is." You chuckle, attempting to not sound too nerdy, but it's true. You spent a lot of your free time here while your parents went away for a weekend or whenever you were bored. He purses his lips together and furrows his brows. "Something about demons, like demonic possession." He struggles to find his words, as if he's confused himself. You slide your book and balance it on one arm, while pointing at the shelf. "Right there." You say, and he nods. "Ah." He chuckles again, picking up the book. "Thank you. It's exactly what I was looking for." He says, scanning the book that you carried. "What's that you got there?"

"A book on witch mythology," You start, frantically trying to think of an excuse to not sound like you're either a weirdo, or a hunter. "It's for my history class I'm taking. It's a weird subject but I don't know, it kinda sounds interesting." You say, focusing your gaze upon his. "History? Where are you studying?" He questions, moving his stance onto his left leg. "Wichita State. Are you studying there too?" You ask him, and he shakes his head. "No, I'm at Stanford. I'm back here in Lawrence to visit family." He says, slowly walking backwards, ushering you to follow, and you comply.

You both sat down at a desk, opposite the bookshelves you were just chatting at. You scoot yourself into the desk, and feel yourself glancing at this tall, strange man as he does the same. "What's your name? I feel bad for not asking." He asks you, and you tell him. "Just Naomi?" he examines your face, as if to find an answer. "Naomi Grace Greaves." You tell him, and he smiles. "Well, nice to meet you Naomi Grace Greaves. I'm Sam William Winchester."

–

Some time passes and you both agree to talk outside of the library, the main reason of this was due to the librarian having to get up out of her seat every 5 minutes to hush you both and point to the "NO TALKING" sign glued onto the bookshelf. You both go to the reception and apologise, while also getting the book stamped for return in 4 weeks’ time.

You both exited the library walking next to each other, crossing the road and planted yourselves onto a picnic table where you both could talk freely and as loud as you like. Sam is across from you, wearing a light blue flannel button-up with orange accents, with a white t-shirt underneath. 'The colours matched him well, you thought. It allowed his naturally tanned skin to show against the bright white, also bringing out the relucent Olympic blue in his eyes. You force yourself to look away before he's driven to think otherwise. "So, what do your parents do? You said you study at Stanford, which is great, but what did your parents do?" You ask, seeing the question almost burn into his skull. "I just want to get to know you better, that's all." You manage to make out, and he coughs. "My mom died before I was born, my older brother Dean was about 4 years old. I haven't seen my dad for a few months, though. He disappears from time to time. I guess it's from losing mom, he wants to be alone." Sam informs you, and you feel your heartbreak inside. You felt for this guy, even though you met him an hour ago, it already felt like you were best friends, despite even knowing anything other than names. "Oh, Sam, I'm so sorry." You empathise, leaning more towards him."I lost my sister in a car accident when I was 6. She was 14. Jasmine was her name... She ended up in a coma for 4 months and she eventually woke up while my father and I was there, and she kept repeating that she saw black eyes. Black eyes and smoke. She'd say; 'Nai, they had black eyes. Smoke inside of them, Nai. Oh my God, black eyes. It's so scary.' Then..." You stop, glaring down at the picnic table. "She'd pass out. We still don't know if it was due to her comatose or from shock or something. She died 2 weeks later." You sigh, Sam looks at you with bleakness in his eyes. "I'm sorry." Was all that he managed to say, and that was alright.

The pair of you sat there in silence for a few minutes, collecting your thoughts whilst unsure on what to say next. Sams ringtone broke the silence, and he quickly answered his phone. "Hey, Dean." He says, then covering the microphone. "Sorry, one sec." He says, removing himself from the table and walking 3 feet away from where you were. You grin at him, attempting to not listen in to his conversation. Was Dean his brother? Maybe father? You asked yourself, unclear on who Dean was.

"Are you serious?" He exclaims, furrowing his eyebrows. "Look, I'm with a friend, and I-" He motions his hand at you, then smirking. "Okay, Dean. Okay. Okay, okay, give me 10 minutes and I'll be back." He hangs up the phone and makes his way back to you. "Sorry again, it's my brother." He explains, and you nod. "Do you need to be elsewhere?" You try to not pry, while still attempting to get a straight answer. "Yeah, my brother needs me somewhere, so I need to go. What's your number?" He scrambles out of the seat again, and so do you. You pull out your flip phone and tell him your number. He enters the digits and sends a quick "It's Sam" text, before picking up his library book. "Sorry to cut this short but I'll text you when I'm next in town." He grins, walking away. "See you later, Sam." You almost yell, and he waves. "Goodbye, Naomi."

You pick up your mythology book and stare at your phone screen, you changed the 10 digit number to 'Sam W'. You smile to yourself, uncertain on what could unravel with Sam Winchester.

–

Later on that night, you receive a call from Sam. Your heart felt like it warmed from seeing his name on your screen, and you press answer. "Hello Sammy." You giggle, thinking of the little nickname on the spot. "Ha ha, very original." He says, then chuckles. "What are you up to?" He asks you, and you softly view the contents in your room. "Nothing, why?" You sit up properly on your bed, one hand sandwiched between your thighs. "Just wanted to see if you were free to call, that's all." Sams' end of the call went silent, and you look up at the clock. 9:42PM. "Yeah, sure, I can talk."you smile, laying back down onto your bedsheets. "When will you be back in town?" You ask him, smiling to yourself. "Soon." He laughs, understanding that the word 'soon' could mean tomorrow, or in 6 months time. "Sam!" You exclaim, and he huffs playfully. "What? I said soon." He guffaws. "When is soon?" You ask again, hoping for a serious answer this time. "Maybe... two weeks?" He even questions himself, "I'm not sure. I go back to college on Friday. Then my brother wants me to go on a roadtrip with him on Saturday." He sighs, you hear him rub his face, the facial hair coming into contact with his hand. "Okay. I guess I can wait." You joke, and he laughs. "You miss me already?" Sam practically smiles through the phone, and you do too.

"Yeah. I do."

[wszczebrzyszynie]

do you have Any advice on researching Historical information? or Just.. Culture? Like any good Keywords to put in the search, websites ect? I may be Dumb but I always Struggle with Researching history Especially more intimate things like Fashion and furniture :(

this is actually a very tough question, because while fairly vague (sorry ... ) i know the answers for it, but my brain gets all scattered thinking about how to word it. sorry if this will be tough to read

i dont think there are any good keywords to look for other than the exact thing you want. you need to know what you are looking for, and the more broad the subject (for example, architecture as a whole), the harder it will be to get a specific result you want. you need to know exactly what are you looking for; the era, place, class. if youre not sure exactly what are you looking for yet, wikipedia probably has a page on it, even if broad

if you know exactly what are you looking for, then just... look for it:

online archives are your best friend; while looking through your local library architecture and ethnography sections can be very helpful and i highly encourage it (its fun too! geniuely. support your libraries) it can be harder to get what you need, especially since its, well, local. while i cannot give you any specific archives, as i dont know what are you looking for exactly, i can tell you that sometimes just googling a list of (your country) internet archives and clicking through them can work. its how i found a few regional polish archives. just be aware that some of them look and behave like they were made in 2002, and can be hard to navigate. but they are worth it, as they can have scans of old books, fashion and home magazines, old photography and sketches, fashion plates; very good things overall. personally i like downloading them so that i can get back to them whenever

some museums, libraries and universities have online archives avilable for public. when i was working in my local library i was actually tasked with making online scans of some magazines from 20 years ago. hellish work but digitalization is good and these places are very much worth looking for, but theyre often specific to their own little thing, so again, you need to know exactly what are you looking for. sometimes you dont even know what project has an archive; a very nice highland scottish archive i found on request of my mutual is either run or partnered with a charity, so really just look for archives. chances are you find something

despite what i said earlier, it really is worth it to check your library. while online archives have book scans, they have to comply with the copyright law, meaning that many books on the subject of your interest are going to be unavilable there

chances are, there is a blog about it. not only on tumblr, but old blogs on things like wordpress can really be a lot of fun to go through. while theyre usually not run by experts, they can be of huge help and i love them dearly. you just need to be extra careful with these and not take any for granted, especially if they dont have sources ...

not sure if thats what you wanted exactly. but thats the best i can offer at 11pm

[1863-project]

Hi!! I’ve followed u for a while and only noticed recently that your desc says you’re an archivist! Im also a history nerd and trying to go for archives as a job in the future, especially in NY which would be really fun. If it’s alright to ask, do you have any general advice/tips for future archivists, and what’s your favorite part ab the archiving job you do, or the archive itself (that you work with)? No worries if not, either way congrats on having the coolest job ever >:D!! - Fellow autistic archive enthusiast

Hello, future fellow archivist!

The most important thing is that if this is the career you want to pursue, you're going to have to go to library school and get a degree in archives and records management. I know it's a lot of work and gets expensive (I'm still in debt), but most big archivist jobs won't even look your way without that Master's degree, which does suck.

It also took me an extremely long time to land my current position. I finished grad school in December 2014, and I finally ended up here, in a proper archival job, in February 2024. That's nearly ten years of working temp positions and at reference desks at public libraries as I searched. Archival jobs can be few and far between, because once an archivist settles in, they're going to become the one who knows the collection best and stay for a long time, so stay sharp and apply to every opening you find! Don't be afraid to take on temp jobs and processing archivist projects because that experience goes a long way on both your resume and for you personally. It can be discouraging, but if you really want this, don't give up - it's an extremely fulfilling career path if you're passionate about history.

My current position is essentially a dream job for me because of the subject matter I'm archiving. If you're lucky, you'll hopefully have that experience too, working at a place where you have a lot of subject expertise and passion.

I cannot suggest volunteering enough, though. Even before I went to grad school, I was volunteering at historical societies, libraries, and museums to help out where I could and get my foot in the door. Those connections are important - you'll need references to tell the jobs you apply to how good you are at the work - but it's also a really good way to make sure you actually like the work in the first place! Archiving can be a lot of drudgery and repetitive cataloguing, and that's not for everyone. (As an autistic person it suits me just fine, but that won't be the case for every single autistic person, and certainly not every single person!)

The best thing about working where I do now is the relative safety compared to my previous job. I was at a public library for 5 and a half years before this as their local history librarian/a reference librarian, and it felt more and more unsafe for me, especially mentally, because I couldn't use certain accommodations on the reference desk and I was constantly doing emotional labor for patrons who saw the reference librarians more like social workers (even though the library had an actual social worker). I got to a point where I was non-functional at home when I wasn't working there, and it scared me. I was deeply burnt out by the time I managed to get my current position, and I'm still recovering now. I was actually assaulted at my former job - a patron put his hand on the back of my leg above my knee and started to move it up towards my ass, but he didn't get there because I hit him (the staff defended me on that one; we had video footage, too). That was in November 2021, and from that point on I felt actively unsafe at that job and less and less like I would be protected if things happened because of a number of changes that occurred afterwards.

But now I'm behind a door that locks. Patrons can't come directly up to me. Researchers have to make an appointment in advance or email or call me if they need information. I'm archiving. I'm not constantly doing reference work, not being thrown around at random to different branches because there aren't branches, just storage locations, not having accommodations like noise-cancelling headphones or my sketchbook taken away from me. I'm so much safer here, and it's a place I can start to heal from everything in.

I hope this answers your initial questions, and if you want details on anything, hit me up - I'm so glad to help people get started in archiving and figure out their next steps!

[gohandinhand]

1, 7, 14 for the book meme! (this has reminded me to try to read books more!)

so glad to hear i am successfully pushing the "read more books" agenda ☺️

1. book you’ve reread the most times? i answered this already BUT i'll answer again with a different book i reread recently! (pls do not judge me for this lmfao) The Ship Who Searched by Anne McCaffrey. I grew up on her books (arguably started reading them far too young, my parents didn't keep an eye on or restrict my reading material in any way growing up... i guess they figured "has a college reading level at 12 means she's ready to read adult subject matter", yikes) and i have MUCH to say about the various series/universes but i have a particular soft spot for this one as it was one of the first i read. unhinged worldbuilding, as per usual; general idea is "severely handicapped persons are permanently installed in mobile life support containers as a mobility aid. when they hit adulthood these 'shellpersons' are wired into spaceships, spacestations, research installations, etc in such a way that that these facilities essentially become their bodies". it's fucked, it's amazing, soulless rich people will always screw over everyone else as long as they get theirs.

7. is there a series/book that got you into reading? mmmm, nothing in particular i can point to! my whole family are big readers, growing up the front room of our house was ringed with floor to ceiling bookshelves (mostly full of my parent's questionable scifi books lmao) and i definitely got into reading some time before my childhood memories kick in! as i said above though, mccaffrey books were a big feature... oh, and my childhood bff and i were obsessed with the Replica series by Marilyn Kaye in elementary and middle school. these are unhinged and NOT good enough to reread now as an adult lmao

14. do you ever mark/dog ear books you own? i will admit that i grew up dog earing 😬 we tended to buy and sell through the local used bookstore rather than get library books, i didn't realize it was generally looked down upon until i was an adult. i don't dog ear anymore (i took pleasure in stocking up on fun bookmarks) & i never marked in any other way!

[pinkacademic]

hey girl it's the harvard anon here and i got 2/5 on my graded 2nd quiz and last time i got 3/5 and im lowkey so annoyed especially because i was up all last night studying & doing the lectures like damn y'all use words that ive Never seen y'all use in the lectures, like, i'm glad I at least got some of the questions right but still 😭

Hey girl! Sorry you’re struggling!! Let’s talk about how to ask for help.

Who can you go to?

Do you have a rapport with your lecturer?

If not, is it too late to send an email?

From my understanding, American universities tend to have like… teaching assistants also? Do have a rapport with any of them?

If not, could you send a few emails?

Don’t be intimidated. Most likely, they’re all really chill people who are genuinely passionate about the subject and who genuinely want to help people succeed. The arseholes are rare but even they know it reflects better on them when their students succeed.

Are there study groups?

Does your subject have a club/society?

What about friends in your class?

And of course, the internet.

Oh, and look for resources such as study support (they can have different names) who essentially you can go to, usually like an hour a week, and who help you with things you may struggle with. This is often available to disabled students, and abled students can also often avail of the services, it just depends what’s available.

Now, of course, the specific point you brought up was a problem with vocabulary. So let’s talk about that.

Google is a hellscape, but search engines are your friend

Do you have a source such as a vocabulary guide for your subject, a glossary, or even just a straight-up dictionary of terms. If you’re not sure, ask an academic librarian for help. And honestly? Just a regular librarian in your local, off-campus library, if the former is intimidating… this is part of my pro-libraries agenda.

Let’s talk also about studying.

Sorry, but cramming is for emergencies only. I don’t know if you did cram, but you said you studied all night. I’m wondering if you need to change your routine

I have plenty of resources of my blog on: different kinds of learners and what helps them (including what helped me) scheduling, etc. I still have work to do on the #pink academia masterpost project, but everything in my study series ought have that tag.

Do your own research

Ask people you know

And girl, sleep is good for your brain.

The most important thing tho is not giving up!! You can do this! You CAN do this!!

HOWEVER

I also want to make it clear that there is no shame in doing so either. If this situation isn’t right for you, get on out.

With that disclaimer out of the way, remember that the best thing you can do is maintain your inner peace, and to remember that a Positive Attitude Changes Everything.

This test does not define you. You are the lexicographer of your own life ok? You define you.

TLDR: ask for help, change your study routine, sleep is good for you, there’s no harm in dropping out, HOWEVER remember to be positive and you can achieve what you’ve worked for.

[wearelibrarian]

So, I'm a LIS student, recently started an internship at a local public library and was told that they're moving me from the technical area (classifying and describing books) to reference temporarily (because we're short-staffed due to summer holidays).

I'm really nervous about dealing with people, helping them find whatever they want and giving them recs if asked. I'm shy and awkward and haven't been reading much lately, so I just wanted to know if you have any advice for me?

Hi!

Want to know a secret?

In my first library desk job, back at my undergrad, I… didn’t do very well interacting with patrons when I first started. My boss shifted me to behind the scenes stuff for an entire semester before giving me a second chance at the desk, didn’t tell me the full reason behind the shift until much later. That’s a story for another day, and one better suited for my main rather than Librarian.

What makes one succeed at a reference and/or circulation desk isn’t reading all the books - I tried that, it didn’t help. It’s being able to meet people where they are.

A reference interview is a conversation. It’s about listening to what someone is asking, giving follow up questions to get a better picture, and exploring for an answer together. Patron wants horror recommendations? Pull up the library catalog, show them how to search by subject, how to filter searches. If your library has access to readers advisory databases (my university does but we also have a strong library science program), plug in some books the patron liked in the past and see what it suggests. Some patron questions won’t even be directly related to the library’s collection - I’ve been asked for directions too many times to count, and it’s never bad to memorize the location of the closest bathroom to your desk.

Remember… your job is to help. You won’t have every answer, but you can at least provide a nudge in the right direction. There’s nothing wrong with taking down someone’s contact information to reach out to them later if it’s a question which requires you to dig, or to ask a supervisor for help, or to refer a patron to another organization.

(Hey, tumblarians, I know a LOT of you follow me. Anyone able to give more advice to anon?)

[mercurygray]

Hi! How are you?

I hope you are well.

I wanna ask something if it doesn't take your time.

Do you have any suggestion on how to make research about World War 2 for a fanfiction?

Generally do you have any book recommendation on World War Two? Specifically about woman in war and world war two military healthcare, doktora,surgeons, nurses, medics etc.

Thank you already. (I am an anon cause I am shy even on internet.)

This is a great question, Kind Anonymous Friend, and I don't mind answering it at all!

I answered a similar question here in 2021, and I stand by everything I wrote here: Advice for writing Band of Brothers fics I have a list of books that I like and recommend here: Women in World War II Reading List

I have to be honest and say that my reading list doesn't have a lot of books on actual medical care, or the experience of doctors, surgeons, or medics. Certainly all of those people wrote memoirs, though, and that's a great way to start learning about what their lives were like.

If you have access to a good library (your local library, a college library - whatever) go and ask one of the reference librarians for where you would find those books. (Some reference desks now even take questions online!) Librarians are some of the world's friendliest and most knowledgeable people and they are there to help. They are also usually trained to ask questions to figure out how to get you what you need.

If you can't access the librarian, that's fine! Take some of the titles on the list I gave and look up some of the books in your library's catalog. If you can find one book in the catalog, go and find it on the shelf and then look at the books around it.

Also take a look at the catalog record for the book. Catalog records contain subjects - strings of keywords you can use to find other books in the catalog on similar topics. (If you're using a digital catalog, you can often click that subject to search by it.)

Ruth Haskell's Helmets and Lipstick, a memoir of her time with the US Army Nurse Corps, uses the following subjects in its WorldCat library record:

World War, 1939-1945 Medical care World War, 1939-1945 Personal narratives, American

A doctor's war : the memoir of Charles E. Tegtmeyer, Combat Surgeon in the 1st Infantry Division, 1940-1945, another memoir, this time from a US Army surgeon:

Medicine, Military Medicine, Military Biography Surgeons Surgeons United States Biography Tegtmeyer, Charles E United States United States. Army. Infantry Division, 1st World War, 1939-1945 Biography

And If I Perish: Frontline U.S. Army Nurses in World War II, by Evelyn Monahan and Rosemary Neidel-Greenlee, a general overview book of American nurses in World War Two:

Military nursing Military nursing United States History 20th century United States. Army Nurse Corps United States. Army Nurse Corps History 20th century World War, 1939-1945 Medical care United States

If you do NOT have access to a physical library, for whatever reason, archive.org is a great and wonderful resource that has many digital books available for free just by creating an account. You can use some of the subject headings I've given here to see if you can find a digital book on the subject you want! Archive.org is also fun because they have a large number of original documents from the 1940s, as well as some films. (A quick search just now got me War Dept Film Bulletin146: Medical Service In The Invasion Of Normandy, 1944)

Whatever you find, I recommend reading widely - not just about the specific subject you're interested in, but general knowledge, too. And good luck!

[misseasybake]

I just had a dream. I remember walking around school during classes (I graduated a year ago). As I went down from the third to the second floor, a classmate caught up to me from behind. We chatted for a bit while walking. I was walking to the toilet, so I entered it. My friend wanted to go with me (he was too invested in our conversation), but I reminded him that he's a guy. Every girl that was there laughed. The guy stayed behind. The girls there seemed to be from the A class. And some of them were the ones I'm in uni with. I took a bathroom stall. Right after I did it, I figured I didn't wanna pee. Or couldn't bc there was this impatient girl outside who kept bugging me (she's usually not like that irl). As I walked out of the stall, I saw two girls setting up their beds as if they were going to sleep. It was still light outside (I don't even know what bothers me more: girls sleeping in the toilet or that it was still light outside). Anyway, I left the bathroom, found my guy friend, and went to the first floor. I said that we had to visit a library as I was looking for a book. We entered the school library. This one was not on my mind, but the local one. Strangely, the insides of the library were just like I wanted or expected them to be. We entered, and I wanted to start searching for a book, but a blond lady was sitting behind a desk. She asked me to help find her Alice in Wonderland. She mistook me for a librarian, but I helped her anyway. I went to where I saw a librarian looking for fantasy books, but I couldn't find it. I looked around, and there were only psychology, history, and the books I saved on pinterest to read later. Anyway, it was not like I was serious about helping that woman. I just walked around the library and said the book she was looking for was not there. She asked me a couple more questions on different subjects and left just as the real librarian walked in. The librarian was with somebody, too. She talked to that person and then sat down with me (I was sitting behind a desk, not where the woman sat). She told me what we would have to do for me to get the book I wanted. I agreed to everything. It seemed like no hustle. She mentioned some of my classmates and one of my current uni group mates as prominent visitors. Just a note: none of the people I currently study with are from my city. Then, she handed me a form to fill out. I had to write down my parents' names. She said it's just a formality, and I can write down whoever I want. It made me sorta happy, as I'm not on friendly terms with my parents. I don't remember whose names I wrote down. When the time passed, she asked me for a book I was looking for. And here I realized I forgot the name. It's the third time I've seen this dream and left the library with no book I've been looking for. Here, the dream ended.

"

Walking Around School

School Environment: Dreaming about being back in school, especially after graduating, can represent a longing for familiarity and the structure that school provides. It may also symbolize a period of personal growth or lessons that you are currently learning in your life.

Classmate Interaction: Chatting with a classmate from behind could signify unresolved issues or ongoing connections with people from your past. It may indicate a desire to reconnect with old friends or a need for more social interaction. Alternatively, it may suggest feelings of competition or comparison with others.

The Toilet Scene

Entering the Toilet: Needing to use the toilet might symbolize a need to release or express something emotionally or mentally. You're letting go of unimportant people in your life and will soon feel refreshed and healthy. 

Friend Wanting to Follow: Your friend being overly invested in your conversation and wanting to follow you into a gender-specific space may indicate a feeling of boundaries being crossed or a need for privacy in certain areas of your life.

Girls Laughing: This reaction could symbolize a fear of judgment or embarrassment in social situations, or it could reflect a playful side of your interactions with others.

Girls from A Class and Uni: Seeing girls from both your high school and university suggests a blending of past and present experiences, perhaps indicating how your past continues to influence your current life.

Setting Up Beds in the Toilet: This odd occurrence might symbolize a feeling of discomfort or incongruity in certain aspects of your life. It could also represent a need for rest or a desire to feel at home in unfamiliar places.

Using the Bathroom: The fact that you couldn’t use the bathroom due to an impatient girl may suggest that there is something or someone in your waking life that is causing you stress or impatience, preventing you from taking care of your personal needs.

The Library Scene

Going to the Library: This might represent a quest for knowledge, wisdom, answers, or self-discovery. Your quest for a specific book could represent a search for knowledge, understanding, or a specific answer in your life. If people in the library are talking or if you have trouble finding a particular book, the dream suggests that you should concentrate more. To dream that you are in the library signifies your search for knowledge and truth. You may be seeking new purpose and meaning in life. It is also indicative of the need to carefully consider all possible scenarios before making major decisions. The world of knowledge is calling to you. You have within you the capacity to connect to all the wisdom in the world if you choose to cultivate a relationship with that part of your nature. A library is a repository of knowledge and assessable information, and a dream featuring a library may show you that you need to learn all you can about a certain thing or situation before becoming involved. You are learning, growing, and expanding.

Blond Lady Mistaking You for a Librarian: Being mistaken for someone else could symbolize confusion about your identity or role. Mistaking you for a librarian and asking for help might suggest that others see you as knowledgeable or resourceful.

Searching for 'Alice in Wonderland': This specific book may represent a desire to escape or explore fantastical ideas. It could also symbolize a journey of self-discovery and navigating through confusing or surreal experiences.

Books on Pinterest: Finding books you've saved on Pinterest suggests a blend of your real-life interests and your subconscious mind. It indicates that your aspirations and interests are important to your self-identity. This might indicate a disconnect between your aspirations and your current reality or resources.

Formality with Parents' Names: Writing down parents' names but feeling happy you could choose anyone indicates a complex relationship with authority or your past. It might signify a desire for freedom from past constraints. You have more freedom and flexibility in your choices than you realize.

Forgetting the Book's Name: The fact that you keep forgetting the book's name and leave without it might symbolize a feeling of being unprepared or lacking the necessary information to move forward in a particular area of your life. Forgetting something in a dream can represent a fear of losing control or a lack of confidence in your abilities. It may also indicate that you are neglecting something important in your waking life or that you are feeling overwhelmed and unable to keep up with your responsibilities.

Recurring Themes

Unfinished Business: The recurring dream of not finding the book you’re looking for could symbolize a sense of incompletion in your life. There might be a goal, a personal issue, or a piece of knowledge you are striving for but have not yet achieved or understood.

Identity and Transition: Many elements in your dream reflect a search for identity and navigating transitions. The blend of past and present, the confusion about roles, and the interaction with familiar and unfamiliar people suggest that you’re in a period of self-discovery and adjustment.

"

"

You might dream about school at a time when you need to make a big decision about something or change a course of action, for example starting a new job. Your mind may naturally need to draw on past experiences and lessons learned at school on how to cope with new situations and be more resilient to change.

As school was a time when we had to adhere to rules and our life had plenty of structure, it might be that your brain wants a more stable, predictable life.

"

[treehoppers]

We gotta start being curious and asking questions on our own, you can learn things outside of school. Some of us are years out of school now, so school is no longer at fault for your not knowing. You’re just not taking the first step to ask a question.

If you’re a person that needs to actively be doing something, there are plenty of educational games online and on adandonedware sites. Don’t feel ashamed for playing a game made for 5th graders, if it’s teaching and helping you that’s all that matters. I play kids math games to help me cause I was always horrible at math and they really do help.

If you’re a reader (or if you’re not, at least try), there are plenty of reading lists for any historical and social subject on this website alone. If the books are hard or confusing don’t feel ashamed to have your phone next to you to look up words or events (good history books will have an endnotes page, look at it to help you and google stuff you don’t know) Take your time and think while you’re reading, you don’t need to finish the book in a day. If it takes you a month or 2 that’s ok. It’s ok to take your time.

Go to your local libraries website (or type libguide at the end of your search in google), there are plenty of databases there for you to use and explore. My library has a whole documentary streaming database for free, yours might too if you’re a person that needs to watch stuff. My library also does educational talks and events for adults, yours might too. Go check out your libraries.

If you don’t have library resources, there are plenty of free resources for you out there on the internet. There are also plenty of how to research on the internet guides out there too that can help you navigate through all those nonsense websites.

But it’s up to you to even look at these things in the first place. It’s not your highschool teachers fault anymore. Doing these things will only help you in the long run, you’re not stupid for not knowing things you just need to take the first step on your own.

I mean this is the kindest way possible, we have to stop finding identity and pride in ignorance and the unwillingness to learn

There’s nothing wrong with not knowing things, but we have to at least take the initiative to learn

[allengreenfield]

Theresa's Haunted History of the Tri-State: Book Review for Real West Virginia UFOs

Theresa's Haunted History of the Tri-State

Combining the Fact with the Folklore

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Tuesday, December 13, 2022

Book Review for Real West Virginia UFOs

Title: Real West Virginia UFOs: Sightings and Close Encounters, Revised Edition

Author: Dave Spinks

Published by Starborn Illumination Publishing, 2022

Amazon Purchase Information

Dave Spinks' Website Information

After a two-year pandemic related hiatus, the annual Mothman Festival finally returned in September of 2022...and I'm pretty sure it was one of the largest paranormal events in history! So, needless to say, it was pretty crowded and pretty overwhelming, so much in fact that I really didn't get a chance to take many pictures or really do too many of my usual festival activities---except for one of my favorite activities: book buying!

No amount of crowds can stop me from taking advantage of having so many wonderful paranormal authors and vendors in one place. Yeah, most of the books that I buy at these types of events can be picked up online, through Amazon or the authors'/publishers' websites, but there's something really special about getting to meet the author in person. Even an introvert like me enjoys chatting about the paranormal with other paranormal enthusiasts. I love having the opportunity to add personally autographed books to my library. And, most importantly, I love directly supporting my friends and colleagues in the paranormal community. 

Among my pickups this year was Real West Virginia UFOs: Sightings and Close Encounters, by local author and researcher, Dave Spinks. As the title suggests, it is a compendium of UFO sightings in the Mountain State. Much of the book is laid out chronologically---each chapter covers a decade of UFO sightings in West Virginia, ranging from highly publicized cases such as the Flatwoods Monster incident and the Woodrow Derenberger encounter, to  never before reported sightings found only in this book. However, this book is more than just a laundry list of sightings; it is a fascinating look at how the history of West Virginia's ufology directly correlates with the history of ufology in the United States as a whole. 

For whatever reason, West Virginia is an absolute hot spot for UFO sightings and UFO-related phenomenon. This book is packed with information about eye-witness accounts, famous close-encounters, and the people/organizations who investigated them. Historically, there has been so much strangeness going on in the skies above the Mountain State and within the hills below, that we were chosen as an official spot for Project Ozma and the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence! The huge radio telescope can be toured today at the Green Bank Observatory in Pocahontas County, and special SETI tours are offered periodically. 

Real West Virginia UFOs is a well-researched glimpse into that strangeness mentioned above. There's plenty of meat to each featured case to give readers a good, satisfying summary, but not so many details as to bog down the casual reader with unnecessary information. Resources and bibliography provided at the end are available for those who wish to deep-dive a little further into certain subjects discussed. Photographs of suspected UFOs are provided when available, and there's even a whole chapter contributed by Ron Lanham featuring cases sent into the Wild and Weird West Virginia High Strangeness Collective!  Overall, this is just a really fun, informative read about one side of West Virginia's unique history. Grab yourself a copy if you love anything to do with the strange and spooky history of the Mountain State, or pick up a copy for a friend or relative this holiday season---I'm sure this book will be the perfect stocking stuffer for the UFO enthusiast in your life!

Want MORE UFO content? Check out my post, UFO Tourism in West Virginia!

TheresaHPIR at 6:32:00 AM

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TheresaHPIR

Winfield, West Virginia

Theresa is an investigator with Spectral Research and Investigation, based in Huntington, WV. She has over 20 years of investigation experience.

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[cherrysung]

lesson learned

pairing: nerd!jaemin x reader

genre: smut / slight fluff

warnings: language, unprotected sex (stay safe!), riding, thigh riding, grinding, finger sucking, dirty talk, slight degradation

prompts: none

summary: tinted cheeks and sheepish glances might’ve been a delight to observe every time his eyes scanned intellectual phrases on books, but as your words reached dangerous levels, you realized not all is what it seems.

requested by anon.

word count: 2.5k

note: anonnie... I think I got carried away with this a lil bit, oops. I hope you enjoy this though, thank you for requesting! jaemin with glasses is superior oof

cherrysung’s navigation

Na Jaemin. Pink cheeks and flushed neck and ears, thin-rimmed glasses that rested peacefully on the bridge of the most perfect nose you’d seen, and his sharp eyes that appeared narrow and hooded as they scanned over way too complicated words that showed up unnecessarily in fiction books.

He wasn’t the stereotypical nerd, in fact, he quite honestly debunked endless labels and beliefs that people like him had endured for years. Unlike portrayed in movies or anywhere else, Na Jaemin was impressingly handsome if you said so yourself. Masculine yet soft features adorned the smooth of his skin like a freshly painted artwork, facial structure built with a jawline that you’d mistake to be carved out by the gods themselves if you didn’t know any better, and an overall physique that even the most athletic guys at college envied. How come the school’s certified nerd was also the biggest hottie? Pair that up with a well-mannered and gentle personality—you get the sweetest boy at heart.

Conservative and reserved most of the time, with his second home being the local library, Jaemin was almost always indulged in some sort of imaginary world. Although popular for his looks, nobody dared approach him, as everybody knew how much he overflowed with shyness, and even oftentimes unintentionally blocked out the social souls that made an effort to utter a word to him.

It didn’t come as a surprise that his grades were also astronomically A+ class and more. There was no need for him to search with concern over universities and a promising education, because unlike you, they actually chased after him. On the other hand, though you did an okay job at even the most challenging subjects, it wasn’t enough to you or to your demanding and irritable parents. Given that, your teacher thought that if you really wanted to improve, getting Jaemin assigned as a tutor seemed like a perfect idea.

Indeed; it was.

Somehow the smartest and quietest senior also turned out to be picky. His looks weren’t the only thing he was popular for—his constant declines on those who wished desperately for his help was too. To say you were shocked that he agreed to lend you a hand, was an understatement.

You officially met Jaemin on a Monday afternoon when the bell rang loudly throughout the empty halls and students escaped tiredly the dull classrooms as if they were prisons. Your calculus teacher called you and the boy over to her wooden, polished desk, where piles of papers that were filled with red marks stacked up. Jaemin carried himself gracefully at all times, dressed in black sweatpants and a white t-shirt with black shoes, you genuinely wondered how such a simple outfit suddenly looked expensive. Not only did his clothes seem to be put together, so did his life in general. He would never miss a day of college even if destiny wanted him to, and his schedule was so precise you felt like an absolute shame next to him.

“Mr. Na Jaemin,” the teacher cleared her throat, hands twirling a red-inked pen between her fingers as she smiled at the boy standing next to you. “At this point, I don’t know why I bother with you anymore, you always seem to decline. But, I thought I should ask you if you were up to helping your fellow classmate over here. She surely has potential, but is clearly struggling.”

You shifted nervously on your feet, cheeks becoming a faint tint of rosy red as your teacher slid over your calculus test towards Jaemin. It read D+. Nearly the entirety of the front page was marked in red, multiple comments explaining why your answers were wrong and circles pointing out your hideous mistakes all for a genius to judge.

His eyes skimmed over your answers, a smile threatening to creep up on his pink lips at just how ridiculous and senseless your processes could get. “I see. Yeah, she seems to have an idea of the topics but probably gets confused easily.”

Ouch.

“Well, would you do me the favor of maybe tutoring her every week for, say, a month?”

He glanced down at you for a split second, gaze returning back to the test in his hands as fast as he had looked away from it. His words sounded direct, leaving his lips with security and firm knowledge; yet, you were sure you could feel his timidity from classrooms away.

“Sure.”

Two weeks later, Jaemin had been tutoring you patiently, sharing his knowledge and tips as best as he could. You discovered, conversational skills and socializing definitely weren’t Jaemin’s specialty, his words spilling from his lips in stumbles and stutters that sounded adorable nonetheless. Contrary to the way he spoke whenever you casually asked him something about him—whether it be his personality, where he’s from, the things he enjoys—to the way his sentences flowed flawlessly whenever he was explaining how a math problem worked, was intriguing to you.

There was something about him that felt new, and mysterious. He was introverted, quite protective of his surroundings and himself; though, somehow the way his middle finger elegantly pushed his spectacles up a tiny bit, and the way his hand occasionally brushed with yours whenever he turned to a new page on your alarmingly huge calculus textbook was doing things to you.

“So, Jaemin,” you interrupted him, his head rising up in question at your sudden intrusion, hand holding a pencil he had been using to point out esencial steps for Definite Integrals. The two of you were currently sitting at your study desk in your bedroom, home alone on a slightly rainy Friday evening, with papers lying around the table and the floor that had infinite math practice tests he had obligated you to do. “How are you so good at calculus. Well, everything, honestly?”

The tip of his ears flushed a deep shade of pink at your indirect compliment, visibly swallowing as his Adam’s apple swiftly moved up and then down. “Uh, I don’t really know. I guess I’ve always practiced a lot as a kid? Maths is my favorite subject so it’s not hard for me…”

His attention was never on you, instead, his eyes shifted awkwardly as long as they successfully avoided your own. You were enjoying his confusion more than you’d like to admit, collecting your thoughts and speaking up once again before he returned to explaining boring equations or graphs. “Why’d you agree to help me? You never help.”

He wordlessly shrugged, hand scratching the back of his head with what appeared nervousness as his eyes solely rested on the paper before him and the paper alone. You thought his face became progressively warmer, a light smile etching across your face. “Are you sure you don’t know?” You glanced at him, turning your chair around to face his side profile directly. “I think there must be a reason.”

“There’s none.” He muttered through gritted teeth, the apple of his cheeks becoming impossibly redder by the minute. “Let’s move on to the next topic—”

“Oh, but are you sure there really is no reason at all? ‘Cause you seem to be hardcore blushing right now.” Your finger moved under his chin, gently guiding his eyes towards yours. “Am I the reason for your obvious struggle, Na Jaemin? Do you, maybe, have the hots for me?”

“Y/N, just—you need to, uh, continue practicing.”

“I don’t want to practice anymore.” A giggle left your lips, face nearing the boy’s hot ears. “I’ll let you in on a little secret. I think you are so handsome, and I can tell you like me too. Or don’t you?”

“Y/N—”

“Don’t you, Jaemin?”

A quiet curse rumbled throughout his chest and out his lips, hands quickly snapping up to grasp your own. “You really don’t want to bother me right now. Stop.”

“I do want to bother you. I know you’re not some innocent, saint boy, Jaemin. Stop putting up that pure act with me, it’s not working.”

“Alright,” Jaemin mumbled, eyes sharply boring into yours, “then you asked for it.” He roughly pulled you towards him, your wheeled chair sliding back at the impact as your legs almost instantly straddled him. With no more words said, his hands softly kneaded your ass, pressing his hardening member directly on your heat as he began rapidly guiding you up and down his covered length.

Whimpers stumbled off your lips at his movements, hands flying up to hold onto his shoulders for balance. Quite frankly, you never thought Jaemin would do this.

“Cat got your tongue suddenly, princess?” Your breath hitched at the pet name, and Jaemin could only smirk at your reaction. “You were all talk and no game? Where did that confidence go? You are such a needy, little bitch. Be a good girl and ride my thigh like the desperate slut you are—wanting to fuck me instead of practicing your math equations.”

He parted his legs, and you were quick to take off your shorts, sitting on the textured fabric of his denim jeans as your hips continued their previous ministrations with Jaemin’s harsh grasp. Moans were leaving you in an uncontrollable mess, feeling so little and helpless under a boy’s gaze whom everybody believed is a harmless child. There was a look plastered on his features that you wanted engraved in your mind forever; pearly whites sinking tenderly into a swollen, red bottom lip, glasses hanging lowly on his nose, and a hooded stare due to the growing wetness on your sheer panties that seeped out onto his jeans.

Fuck, did those glasses make him look so sinful.

“Jaemin,” you stuttered, “I need to cum.”

“Already? We just started the fun, princess.” His actions contradicted his words, hands moving your hips faster on his thigh as he squeezed the muscles, igniting louder sounds of pleasure from you. “Are you close?”

You nodded frantically, no longer giving care to the huge wet patch you had created on his pants, allowing his hands to move you as fast as he wished, pussy clenching around nothing every time your clit ran over the coarse fabric.

“Go ahead, princess, come all over my thigh, you fucking dirty girl. Make a mess.”

His whispers were enough to bring you to your climax, legs shaking unstoppably as your hips stilled abruptly. Jaemin rubbed your back softly, bringing your chin up to lock lips with you. Ardent, and full of lust, the feeling of his tongue running over your bottom lip brought another wave of heat that pooled between your legs, and he could surely feel it. Pulling away, with a string of saliva attaching the two of you, Jaemin unbuckled the leather belt before unbuttoning his jeans, only pushing them down enough to release his dick. It sprung proudly out of his briefs, gently hitting his belly and begging to be played with.

Jaemin smirked at your wide eyes, your gaze running up and down the veiny cock, with a final touch of an angry and red tip at the top that was leaking with pre-cum.

“Can I suck you?”

“Not today, babygirl, do that some other time,” he shook his head, fingers moving your panties to the side and placing you on top of his hard length, “right now all I want is to feel your dripping, pretty pussy. Ride me.”

You silently obliged like the good girl he thought you were, wet cunt sinking on his dick as your walls instantly welcomed him with endless warmth.

“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he lowly cursed, “such a fucking good girl. Why don’t we teach you some basic math while you ride my dick? Come on.” His index and middle fingers tapped your bottom lip, your mouth wrapping around them. “You’re going to answer while you suck on my fingers as if it were my cock.”

On cue to his words, your tongue swirled around his digits experimentally while he ruthlessly thrusted up into your tight pussy with a never ending pace.

“What’s seven plus five, princess?”

You whined on his digits, finding the task harder than you expected as his dick was everything you could think about. Jaemin filled you up so well, fingers occasionally driving into the back of your throat as you choked around them. Tears had begun pooling in your eyes, threatening to fall at any moment as you gagged around his digits once again. “Twelve!”

“Good job,” he delivered a particularly hard thrust, hitting on your sweet spot successfully and earning himself nearly a scream from you. “What about eighteen plus nine? What’s the answer?”

At this point, he was doing all the work, dick sliding in and out of your walls so fast and deliciously. The only sound you could hear around your bedroom was both your skins’ slapping, and sometimes the choked up cries that left your lips whenever his fingers reached too far back in your throat. Your thoughts only revolved around how good Jaemin was fucking you, and how good the glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose looked as he bit his lip. “Twenty-seven!” You struggled to answer, but managed to regardless of his merciless thrusts.

“Four minus nineteen? You got three seconds to answer, sweets.” Jaemin smirked, free hand reaching down to circle rapidly around your clit, his hips speeding up even more. “One.”

“Jaemin, I’m so close!”

He pulled his fingers out of your mouth, drool running down your chin as he wiped his digits on his shirt. “Answer me, or you don’t come.”

Your thoughts were absolutely jumbled, puzzled and confused, searching hazily for a simple answer you couldn’t remember.

“Two.” The movements of his fingers on your swollen bud were beginning to slow down.

“Jaemin, wait!”

“Three—”

“Negative! Negative fifteen, the answer is negative fifteen.”

He cooed at you, speeding up his actions once more as you cried out, head resting on his shoulder tiredly while you slightly bit into the flesh, eliciting hisses that flew from his lips.

“Fuck, I’m so close. Princess, can I fill you up with my cum?”

“Please,” tears ran down your face, your cries muffled as you nuzzled your face into his neck, “please do. Come inside of me, Jaemin, fill me up so well.”

Your desperate pleads and the frantic clenching of your pussy were enough to bring him to the edge, your release following not much long after as his warm cum completely coated your walls white, some seeping out from your cunt and onto his member. Jaemin eventually slowed down his thrusts to a stop, chest heaving up and down as pants left the two of you.

“For your information, I do have the hots for you, too.” He exhaled out a laugh, pulling your body closer to his and gently pecking the top of your head.

“I can’t believe everybody calls you a nerd,” you chuckled, “you literally fucked me into oblivion.”

“Well, you were riling me up. I hope you learned your lesson, little miss.”

“Yeah, I did.” You admitted with a giggle.

“Well, you better keep that pretty mouth closed, we don’t want people knowing the school’s nerd wrecked you so bad, right? Besides, I don’t think I want this to just be a one time thing.” Your head rose at his confession, eyes looking into his own for an answer. “How about a date tomorrow?”

You smiled, sweetly pecking his cheek. “I’d love that. How about I suck your cock after that?”

Jaemin smirked, “your house or mine?”

[not-poignant]

Do you have any tips for actually finding a good therapist? I've been wanting to find a therapist recently, but the only one readily available and who can be covered financially for me is my school/uni therapist. I did try to go in for one session as "trial" and came out feeling even worse than when I came in. I really don't know what to do.

There are a lot of really great articles out there (like this one), if you just google: 'How to find a good therapist' that are going to cover more things in their articles than I can cover in an ask (especially if you focus on your country - financial aid in Australia is different to financial aid in the UK or USA), because I don't have thousands of words on this subject and it is a subject that kind of deserves that much!

So I recommend going off and searching for at least 3-5 articles on this subject instead of going off my response alone. This subject is too important to trust some rando on the internet, and meanwhile actual psychological organisations have got like...hundreds of articles on this subject alone.

That being said, I've never actually heard any good stories from people who have seen school/university therapists. They really only are equipped to handle quite simple, non-complex matters - anxiety around homework (regular anxiety, not severe anxiety), feeling overwhelmed, not knowing if you should change your degree etc.

They are just - overall - not equipped to help you, depending on what your issues are. It would be like seeing a podiatrist for a heart issue, just because you can afford the former, doesn't mean they can do anything for your heart issue. And because they don't understand the latter, they might leave you feeling worse off.

I would invite you to look for therapists that offer sliding scales (they are out there) and to widen your scope to include practitioners who aren't psychologists or psychiatrists (i.e. social workers, counselors, psychotherapists) who often charge much, much less. Also remember to consider telehealth / online appointments.

It's worth emailing anyone you're interested in to ask them about a sliding scale, being honest about your circumstances. While some don't offer one, you might be surprised by how many do. The fact is, many can't openly say this on their website/s, but every psychologist and therapist I've ever seen has actually had a sliding scale. It sometimes took a lot longer to find them, but those people are often much more sensitive to situations relating to chronic illness and poverty in the first place.

If you can only afford one 'good' session every two months, or one 'crappy' session more often, it's better to have one session with someone who can actually help you.

In the meantime, you might also want to look at your local library for books on mental illness/es (remember, any library can order in books from elsewhere as well), including workbooks, or any kind of books. If you suspect you might have anxiety, look up books for anxiety. If you suspect you might have depression, look up books on that subject. Libraries are free, and many don't even have late fines anymore (though you can check if you do).

Consider websites that offer free options for venting/talking to strangers like BlahTherapy, for example. There are places like the University of Queenslaned eCentreClinic that offer completely free 3 months courses on managing a bunch of different disorders and health issues. It's CBT based, but one of the things it offers are about three short phone sessions with a psychiatrist to see how you're doing. The wait times are worth it, and I've done one myself. Not every course is active right now, but I took 'Chronic Conditions' because the PTSD one wasn't available, and it was worth it. I mean it was free, but I was also surprised at how much it helped, given it was CBT/mindfulness based. There are free meditation apps like Smiling Mind which offer a ton of different meditations, as well as places like InSight Timer (which are less mental health based, but there's more meditations).

If your issue/s for finding a therapist are mostly financial, it's necessary to sit down and crunch the numbers - what can you realistically afford if you only see a therapist once a month instead of once a week or fortnight? (For example, I only see my therapist once every 3-5 weeks and finances are a big part of that). Once every two months? Or every three? Are you emailing them to ask about sliding scales?

Outside of that, the articles you will find will largely ask you to a) figure out some goals you want to achieve in advance and b) research what kinds of therapy / types of therapy appeal to you most, so you can narrow in based on say, modality, or subject.

But when finances are the biggest barrier, it's important to think laterally. And it's super important to not assume that just because a facility offers free therapy, that therapy is going to be good for you. Not all therapists are made equal, and the ones working at universities are often there to handle - specifically - university issues. At best, they might refer you onto someone you can't afford (or maybe can, if they have amazing contacts). At worst - and this is most of the stories I've heard - they just can't be helpful for anything more complex, and are sometimes more harmful.

But yeah, even googling 'I can't afford therapy in X country what can I do' will be more helpful than asking me, anon. I don't know your exact circumstances (and probably wouldn't have a tailored answer anyway unless you know my exact skillsets lol) - there are definitely a ton of places you haven't explored yet, and hopefully you find more articles / books / websites / apps and options that help! :)

The fact is, therapy doesn't actually even help everyone who has a mental illness or illness/es (and I'm not saying it won't help you! Just that there are other options in the meantime while finances are tight), and plenty of them will heal via say... journalling, talking to friends, going to meditation workshops, using free meditation apps etc. We find healing outside of therapy all the time. And I'm not saying you have to do that, but my point is - there are a ton of other healing things you can do right now that will be worth trying, and that won't break the bank, or even touch the bank, lol.

ETA: I also wanted to add, feeling worse after a therapist session is actually not uncommon and doesn't mean the therapy was bad. Therapy involves going to painful places and sometimes stirring up emotions that need to be processed, and while it should avoid decompensation, it's important to recognise that like... there's a line between 'this therapy is bad for me' or 'this therapist is minimising my issues' and 'I feel fucking terrible, but anyone would, after talking about this subject.' The latter is like...just how therapy will be, sometimes. Like... there used to be sayings about it - but therapy won't make you feel better a lot of the time, until sometimes weeks, months or years later. It might make some people feel hopeful. But it can make others exhausted and tired. It's hard work. So it's good to have energy to do it. Therapy does not, by default, always feel good to do.

The trick is learning the difference between 'I feel bad because this is bad therapy' or 'I feel bad because this is difficult.' And sometimes even with the former it's 'I feel bad because this is bad therapy and I can tell my therapist that and they will change it which will be a powerful moment' and 'this therapist is just a dickhead, actually.'

[the-l-spacer]

Summary: In which Madeleine's latest attempt to hash things out with Espresso gets a little... out of hand.

This is my first cookie run fic i. genuinely can’t believe im writing for this game now. Anyways, hope ya like it!!

- 

He sees the knight striding towards him, spotless armour clinking smartly with each step he takes, cloak billowing ever-so-slightly behind him.

His lip curls, practically a reflex.

“Espresso. Do you have a moment?” Madeleine's voice, like his appearance, is meticulously crafted to capture the attention of anyone in his vicinity. A deep, resonant baritone that carries authority, brooks no room for disagreement, least of all disagreement from a particular surly practitioner of Coffee Magic.

Or at least, that’s what Madeleine likes to think. For all his chivalrous acts and airs seem to have no effect on Espresso in the slightest, who simply sighs and rolls his dark, bespectacled eyes.

“Do me a favour; skip the pretence that participation in this conversation is optional, and get to the point. I have research that needs attending to.”

Perhaps a few months ago, Espresso’s brusque reply would have stopped Madeleine in his tracks, wiped the genial smile off his face. But as it is, they’ve spent far too much time together (unwillingly, on Espresso’s part) for the other to be fazed by mere unfriendliness. So he simply barrels on as if Espresso had never spoken. “It appears as if that young band of cookies are keen on having us join their party.”

As one, they glance over to the campsite a little ways away, where Gingerbrave and Chilli Pepper are engaged in a mock-swordfight, wielding pieces of gathered firewood, with Wizard, Strawberry and Custard cheering on. Gingerbrave rushes forward, ‘sword’ held aloft, but Chilli Pepper sidesteps his attack, and before his momentum can carry him too far, grabs the scruff of his collar, and turns him to face her. “Sloppy work, kid. I could catch that coming from a mile away. Next time, try-” She pauses mid sentence, noticing Espresso and Madeleine’s gazes. She winks, and gives a two-fingered salute. “Hey! Wanna watch me spar with a buncha kids? There’s plenty of room on that log over there, but just a little warning, I charge adult spectators.”

Madeleine waves a hand. “No need to relieve our pockets just yet, friend Chilli Pepper. Espresso and I are perfectly content watching from afar.”

“And besides, we have better things to do,” Espresso adds, “Like being corralled by a paladin into having pointless conversations.” The last bit, he aims at Madeleine, who’s response is to grin wider.

If the irony in Espresso’s statement registers to Chilli Pepper, she doesn’t show it, and simply shrugs. “Don’t let me interrupt. You boys might wanna head a little further away to have that ‘pointless conversation’ though, it’s probably gonna get noisy up in this joint.”

“An excellent idea! My humblest thanks!” Madeleine sweeps into an exaggerated bow, and takes Espresso by the elbow. “My compatriot and I shall head a little further into the woods for our chat.”

Custard perks up at that, and shouts, “Be careful! There might still be cake monsters running around, and as king, I can’t let my subjects be hurt!”

“Not to worry, we’re more than capable of defending ourselves. If our previous encounters with those beasts suggested anything...”

As Madeleine talks, Espresso discretely tries to wriggle free from the hand on his elbow, but his attempts prove futile, Madeleine’s grip is loose but firm, forming a little cage around his arm.

He lets his arm go limp, and when the grasp loosens slightly in response, he flicks his free hand, around which (unbeknownst to the jabbering knight) shadows had been gathering for quite some time.

A tendril of magic whips around and strikes Madeleine’s wrist.

“-And as Knight of the Madeleine House, I was trained since I was but a little cookie, much like your merry band, to- ah!” When the tendril connects with a small thwack, he releases Espresso, jerking away as if burned (in actuality, the magic was really just a moderately heated slap. Espresso didn’t want to do any serious damage to Madeleine, after all.)

The seemingly permanent smile on the knight’s face falters, just for a second, and Espresso allows himself a moment of schadenfreude.

“Is... is everything okay, Madeleine?” Strawberry pipes up from her spot on the log.

“Quite alright, quite alright.” The ten-carat smile is back in full force, and once again, he waves his (non-injured) hand airily, though Espresso notes with some satisfaction the displeased side glance Madeleine shoots at him.

Espresso’s face pulls into a smile of his own, falsely sweet. “Well. Shall we be off, then?” He begins walking into the woods. True, he would much rather be tucked away in some quiet corner, poring over magical scrolls, but if he has to be subjected to this... chat, at least he can try to have some fun while doing so. Make Madeleine regret initiating contact, make him trail behind for once.

And sure enough, Madeleine follows after him, making long strides to catch up.

As they retreat into the forest, Gingerbrave shouts, “Come back in time for dinner! We’re having sweet jelly stew!”

“We’ll be there,” Madeleine replies, not needing to raise his voice for it to carry across the clearing where they had set up camp.

The other cookies give their final waves, and return to sparring, the sounds of cheering and wood striking wood fading the deeper in Espresso and Madeleine travel.

- 

Eventually, the noises from the campsite fade entirely, replaced by the chirping of birds, and the soft rustling of trees. The last of the day’s light dapples through the jelly forest’s leaves, and Espresso might have called the whole scene pleasant, if not for the cookie next to him.

They come to a stop in a forest clearing. “Is this far enough for your liking, oh Knight-Commander of House Madeleine?”

Madeleine leans against a tree, the light glinting off his armour. “You know, the attitude really isn’t necessary, and neither,” he cocks his head, glossy hair spilling over one shoulder, his reprimanding smile akin to a teacher lecturing a particularly irritating student, “was the use of dark magic back there.”

Espresso smirks. “Ah. Have I discovered your weakness? Is the pride of House Madeleine scared of a little magic? I just meant for it to tickle, really.”

A scowl begins to form on Madeleine’s face, before he schools it back into careful neutrality. “You must be intelligent enough to grasp my meaning. It’s not the act itself, it’s the…” He gestures loosely in the air, his right hand still slightly red, “... the spirit of it all. Cookies who fight together shouldn’t turn on one another. It simply isn’t right.”

“Mmm. Mm hmm. Of course it isn’t.” Espresso, in a bid to minimize the dirt from the forest floor getting on his robes, opts to hover just a little above the ground, and Madeleine has to crane his neck to meet his gaze. “And I’m sure wrestling the cookie you’re supposed to be fighting with into the woods is so much more excusable.”

Madeleine bristles. “You wouldn’t have agreed to this conversation otherwise, as you’ve made so abundantly clear in the past. All I did was ensure you wouldn’t be able to weasel your way out of the inevitable yet another time.”

“What about our current situation makes you think this conversation is inevitable?” Espresso snaps. “I’ve told you time and time again I don’t care for your company. Our paths crossed once, we travelled together briefly to achieve our own goals, and parted ways. We work together acceptably, and we tolerate each other, barely. What more is there to be said between us?”

“Well, for one,” Madeleine says, standing just a bit straighter, as if to deliver a set of prepared lines, “I was telling you, before we were interrupted, that Gingerbrave and his fellows seem eager to have us as travelers alongside them.”

“Yes. And?”

“And I’m sure you are as keen as I am on accepting their offer.”

Espresso stiffens. He hates cookies who presume things about him, and more than that, he hates when those presumptions are right. After a moment, he bites out, “Even if I was, what of it.”

“We’ll be traveling together once again. Serving as their protectors, and all that.”

“So what? As I said, we’ve travelled in each other’s companies before.”

“Yes, but I believe this will be our longest journey yet. They seek answers, a way to defeat the evil forces rising, and this is no easy feat.”

“I seek no such thing,” Espresso scoffs, folding his arms. “I only know that they’re searching for the Forgotten Academy, and that particular locality has a library I’ve been meaning to peruse for a while. I plan to travel with them until that point, where we will then part ways.”

“Even then, according to my maps the Forgotten Academy is weeks away. Maybe a month. Months, if we keep up our current pace. A considerable amount of time that allows for sour dough to spoil further. I simply think it… unwise, to allow things between us two to reach such a point.” Having finally said his piece, Madeleine pushes himself off the roll cake trunk, and starts towards Espresso, open palm outstretched.

No, not again. They had done this dance before, and Espresso isn’t planning to retrace those steps. He whizzes backward, out of Madeleine’s reach.

“I’m not interested in becoming friends, knight,” he spits. “And I tire of your constant overtures.”

Madeleine’s hand returns to his side in an impatient motion. “Must you insist on being this- this difficult?” He asks, voice fraught with frustration. “It is a simple offer. Put our differences aside and work together amicably, if only to to make our journey more tolerable for us and our companions.”

“Ahhh but there’s the rub, Madeleine,” Espresso retorts, “I’m afraid our differences are too great to reconcile. If that is all you have for me, I think I’ll be returning to camp. I would say it’s been a pleasure, but… you know better.”

He makes to leave, floating quickly away to leave the knight behind, but catches a blur of movement from the corner of his eye. Before he can react, Madeline moves forward, his armour and shield glowing. With a flash, the shield comes down on the edge of Espresso’s long, dark cloak, pinning it to the forest floor.

Both of them hear the telltale sound of ripping fabric.

“Don’t move.” Madeleine warns.

Espresso’s vision goes red. He gathers the shadows to him, wreathing his clenched fists in black swirls of magic.

He doesn’t move.

A pause, then the shield lifts.

Espresso doesn’t wait to rush backward, heading straight for Madeleine. This time, it’s the knight that finds himself unprepared, as Espresso grabs him, and with the help of his magic, lifts him in the air, slamming him against the trunk of the nearest tree.

“Don’t. Touch. Me,” he growls.

Their faces are close enough now that Espresso sees the tiniest twitch of fear in Madeleine’s expression. He doesn’t yield, keeping him pinned to the trunk.

Madeleine speaks, holding both hands up in a conciliatory gesture. “Now, now, I admit I was rather hasty, but there really is no need for-“

“- doesn’t feel nice, does it? Being trapped against your will?” Espresso cuts him off.

“Listen. I’m sorry things had to come to that point.”

Espresso sneers. Just as he predicted, Madeleine’s ‘apology’ is anything but. His mouth forms the syllables, but like a pedestrian one accidentally jostles on the street, his ‘sorry’ is merely a formality, said to hear the sound of his own voice.

Espresso doesn’t buy it, is what he’s saying.

“Save it. Save your pithy little apologies and insincere attempts at friendship for some other cookie.”

Madeleine’s face twists in indignation. “I’m not being insincere!”

Espresso drops him unceremoniously, the knight’s armour clattering when he lands on the soft earth. He tries not to betray his own fatigue, both in mind and body. Madeleine is heavy after all, weighed down further by his armour and weapons, making the act of holding him aloft (even aided by magic) one that had taken a not-insignificant toll on him. His feet touch down lightly on the ground, the glowing aura around him fades.

“Oh, spare me,” Espresso says coldly. “Every action, every toss of your hair or flick of your cloak, every word that comes out of your mouth betrays your insincerity.”

Having gathered himself, Madeleine finally snaps, drawing his sword from its scabbard with a metallic hiss. “How dare you.” His voice, a dangerous murmur, grows louder and louder, until it carries to the treetops. “I don’t know what I have done to offend you so. I attempted to be friendly, and reach out with offers of peace, as my family taught me to do for years, but you insist on rebuffing me, sullying my good name with your.. your insolence!”

The sword is pointed at Espresso’s throat, now, and the magician takes a careful step backward, keeping an eye on the gleaming blade. Madeleine doesn’t seem to notice, however, as he barks, “I’ve been lenient in the past, but as a cookie of honour, I can’t let such words continue to slide. The Divine, protect me!”

Celestial light bathes the forest clearing, surrounding Madeleine in its radiance. He lunges forward and swings his sword, a ray of light arcing from its blade. Espresso, caught unawares, finds himself knocked back, sent stumbling to catch his footing.

He regains his balance, clutching on to a tree branch, and counters the next light ray with an explosion of coffee beans that makes Madeleine's attack fizzle out.

“You know I’m right about you,” Espresso taunts, “in fact, we both know this is all a little charade you put on, because-” he plants his feet firmly in the ground, bracing himself against a third wave of light magic. “- beneath all your bravado, your shiny armour and fancy new weapons, you are empty.”

“That’s not true!” Madeleine roars, attempting to close the distance between them. But Espresso splays his hands, and a swirling vortex forms, pulling the paladin backward and into its dark center. Madeleine staggers in pain.

“You’re just a selfish glory-seeker, as slow and soulless as the monsters that- gah!”

Dexterity had never been his strong suit, so when Madeleine’s retaliating attack comes, he doesn’t dodge quickly enough. He sees the sword swing, feels an impact across his face, before his world goes blurry.

His glasses!

A lance of panic spikes through his chest.

He can’t see. He can’t see and he can’t look for his glasses either because if he steps on them that’s it. And Madeleine will win or worse he’ll just leave him here, in the middle of the woods.

The attacks stop coming.

The forest is silent once more, but for the two cookies’ heavy breathing.

Then, Espresso hears the crunching of leaves, sees the blurry shape of Madeleine stride towards him. He readies his magic. Madeleine passes him, and bends down over a spot Espresso can’t quite see.

A familiar metallic object is pressed into his hand.

“Your glasses.”

In a flash, Espresso has them on again, and exhales in relief when the forest comes back into focus.

“I never meant to knock them over. I’m sorry.”

Espresso is about to respond, but Madeleine says, “We should not have let our discussion escalate like this.”

“I’m sorry. We?!” Espresso’s recently restored vision colours. “When it was you who dealt the first blow? You, who initiated this discussion in the first place, who-” He trails off, righteous indignation fading slightly when he sees Madeleine, who stands at arm’s length away from him, both hands resting on the pommel of his sword, his expression unreadable.

“..Yes. Fine. As allies, we shouldn’t have turned on each other like this.”

Madeleine says nothing, so Espresso continues. “But as our previous attempts at civility have shown, you are incapable of holding a conversation without trying to domineer over me, push me into situations I do not want to be in. And I… I admit that I went too far in my personal assessments of you, but the fact remains that I simply cannot work with you beyond what we already are. Allies, and nothing more.”

For the second time, Espresso begins walking back to camp. Madeleine makes no attempt to stop him. “Thank you for retrieving my glasses. Good evening.”

Before he can fully retreat into the copse of trees, he hears Madeleine’s voice, saying, “Wait.”

Espresso pauses for a moment, and continues walking.

“Wait. Please.”

The word ‘please’ sounds so strange on Madeleine’s lips, and Espresso realises he can’t recall if the cookie had ever said the word in all the time they had worked together.

He turns his head.

Madeleine is leaned against a tree, arms folded and a foot kicked up against the trunk. His face is hidden by a curtain of hair.

“You are from The Republic, yes?”

Thrown by the sudden question, Espresso says, “Yes. The both of us are.”

“You’re aware that The Republic is a peaceful nation. No conflict within its gates, no monsters to be found without.”

Where is this going? Espresso responds, “Safe, sterile, and utterly boring. I’m aware.”

“Then what,” Madeleine turns his face away from Espresso, addressing the trees, “what use do you think such a nation has for soldiers? For knights?”

Oh.

Madeleine laughs, not his usual hearty guffaw, filled to the brim with bravado, but a short and bitter exhalation. “Do you know what it’s like to be, as you called me, the ‘slow’ one, in a family of scholars and politicians? For your only prowess to be your physical strength, in a place where that skill is entirely unnecessary?”

“But the knight order you lead-”

“- is purely for show. Just cookies dressed up in shiny armour to remind the other kingdoms we’re not to be trifled with. None of them have actually seen a day of real combat outside of sparring.”

Espresso is back in the clearing, picking a position next to Madeleine so he doesn’t see his sympathetic expression.

“Then… the reason you and all the knights were sent out?”

“As I said, my mission was to seek the legendary Soul Jam that is supposed to grant us cookies eternal life. Not that anyone in the Republic really expects us to find it.”

“They wanted to get rid of you, then.”

Madeleine visibly flinches at Espresso’s words. “I wouldn’t put it so bluntly, but… yes. I’m welcome back home, of course. If I were to return, I’d be met with trumpets and fanfare, but not much else, and certainly not anything approaching respect from those who truly matter.” The knight clenches his fist. “This quest is to be my saving grace. My only purpose, and the only way one like me can conceivably bring pride to House Madeleine. The only way I can be of use”

Espresso regards Madeleine, the revelation casting the cookie in a new light.

“So.. yes, Espresso. I am a selfish glory-seeker. Perhaps I have no other choice but to be.” Madeleine’s previously ramrod-straight posture is gone, and in its place his fists are clenched, shoulders hunched inwards, his hair tumbling forward, shielding his face from view.

And a small part of Espresso feels the strangest urge to push that hair back, to place a comforting hand on the paladin’s shoulder. Anything to stop what has to be the strongest — the most annoying, surely, but the strongest nevertheless — cookie he knows from curling into himself, from hurting like this.

But he holds himself back. All he lets out is a soft, “I think I know how you feel. Not entirely, but some of it.”

Madeleine turns to look at Espresso, a blank expression on his face. “You do.”

The mage lets a spark of magic fly from his hand - a single, glowing coffee bean surrounded by dark shadow. “You have called what I do ‘black magic’ in the past.”

Madeleine, suddenly stricken, says, “I wouldn’t go so far as to call it ‘black magic’, but-”

“- Listen. You have, countless times. And it annoys me to no end, but I understand why. It does look like it, no?” He conjures more coffee beans, letting them spin in circles around him. “I’ve had this ability since I was a child. It did not come from dark origins, I did not make a pact with evil forces to obtain it, as some have believed. It simply was. My magic, like your physical strength, is a part of me.”

Madeleine simply nods.

“But people don’t understand Coffee Magic. Whenever I demonstrated my abilities, I’d be shunned, the respectable citizens of our beloved Republic saying that I was a child of Dark Enchantress Cookie.”

“Espresso…” His magic fizzles out, and now, it is his turn to look away, incapable of facing the pity that is surely in Madeleine’s gaze.

“I was barred from every magic school. I had to learn, and practice, and make it on my own. If I didn’t have Latte Cookie, I don’t know how I would have-” Espresso shakes his head. “No matter. All I am saying is that I do know how it feels, not to belong. To have to carve a place for yourself among people who can’t respect you.”

A hand settles on his shoulder, and Espresso almost flinches. He looks up, and his gaze meets Madeleine’s, earnest and apologetic. “Espresso, first and foremost, I am sorry that I ripped your cloak in trying to keep you here.”

Espresso’s eyes travel to his torn (and expensive) wizard’s cloak. “It’s fine. I’ll just have to get it repaired once we return to camp.”

Madeleine continues. “And I’m sorry, truly sorry that I misjudged you based on your magic. That I pushed when I should have respected your wishes. Respected you.”

And this time, Espresso believes Madeleine’s words. He lets his own hand creep upwards to rest over the knight’s.

He sighs. “And I apologise, too. I made undue assumptions about you, and let these assumptions colour my actions. I treated you poorly, and for that, I’m sorry.”

When their eyes meet again, it is as if the forest goes silent, nature’s rustle and hum being forgotten as the two look at each other, and for the first time, understand.

Of course, no moment can truly last, and it is Espresso who breaks the spell, gently moving Madeleine’s hand off his shoulder. “Naturally, don’t think this means I’ll let you strongarm me into doing whatever you want me to. You still irritate me. Incessantly.”

Madeleine chuckles. “Naturally. Besides, I do not imagine such actions will be necessary in the future. I think we understand each other perfectly clearly, now.”

Espresso lets a grin creep across his face. Rolling his eyes, he says, “Don’t assume you know everything based on a tidbit of my past. I encompass multitudes, Knight-Commander.”

“In turn, I request that you not write me off just yet,” Madeleine responds teasingly. “I may not know everything about you, but I would be very interested to,”

Both their eyes widen, Madeleine realising the forwardness of his statement. “That is. I will give you the space you need, certainly, but if you ever feel like-”

“- Wait. Stop.” Espresso takes a breath, lets it out. “I- I do feel the same way. You’re a good fighter, and I did not let myself give you a fair chance.”

He crosses the short distance between them, and extends a hand. “I’m Espresso Cookie of The Republic. Founder of the Coffee Magic School. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

Madeleine regards the outstretched hand in wonder.

"... Don't make a big deal of it, knight."

He puffs out his chest, taking Espresso’s hand. “And I’m Madeleine Cookie of The Republic. Servant of The Divine, Knight Comm-” He stops himself, clears his throat. Then, he smiles and simply says, “I’m Madeleine Cookie. It’s an honour to get to know you.”

[thepoisonroom]

if your library doesn’t have an item you need, you can submit a request for them to purchase it! note that this is mostly true for public and academic/university/college libraries; school libraries don’t regularly offer this option, though you can speak with your librarian to learn more about what you can do.

submitting a request doesn’t guarantee they’ll purchase it 100% of the time, but it’s a good way to express your needs, and libraries often use this information to identify areas where their collection and services are lacking and create acquisitions plans! this is an especially useful option if you want:

a new or upcoming book! identifying highly-anticipated releases helps libraries make decisions about ordering books, developing collections, and planning outreach/programming

a translation or format (e.g. large print, braille, screen-readable e-book, audiobook on CD or tape, audiobook on playaway) that you need to access the work.

purchase requests are a great way to encourage your library to buy upcoming books that you’re excited about! this is a really good option for supporting authors, especially when you can’t buy the book yourself. read on for more info. keep in mind also that most libraries have privacy policies that protect any identifying data about patrons, including what individuals check out and what they request. if you’re not sure what your library’s policy is, check their website or contact their reference desk (see below).

if your library doesn’t have a book you want, there are a few options you can and should explore before jumping to a purchase request:

see if it’s available in alternate formats through other library tools! many libraries subscribe to publisher databases or ebook/audiobook borrowing platforms like overdrive. the items available here will not always be listed/discoverable in your library’s catalog system.

request it through interlibrary loan (ILL) or outerlibrary loan (OLL)! these are both commonly used terms for requesting items from other libraries. different libraries use these differently but most should offer one or both.

contact your library’s reference desk to see if they can help you find another way to access the thing you want! you can often get in touch with a librarian directly online; it’ll usually be listed as “ask a librarian chat” or something similar. most libraries will also answer questions over the phone or email, in person or will have a “contact us” web form you can submit.

so if you’ve checked out your options and you’re sure you want to purchase request, the process is pretty straightforward! my local public library’s website has this handy little link right at the bottom, but it’ll usually be listed as “request a purchase” or “recommend a purchase”

[image description: this image shows a list of links in black text on a grey background. The list of links is titled “Popular services”. The services listed are: reserve a computer, check your email, recommend a purchase, outerlibrary loan, ask a librarian, computing and wireless, reserve meeting rooms, email newsletters, and curbside pickup. The link that says “recommend a purchase” is circled in red.]

most libraries will have a webform that you fill out with item information that’ll look something like this:

[image description: this image shows half of an unfilled web form written in black text on a white background. The first field says Title above it. It is a textbox. The next field is a textbox titled Author/creator. The third field is a textbox titled Publisher. The fourth field is a textbox titled Date of publication. Below the textbox it says “Use the format YYYY-MM-DD (e.g., 2018-12-25)”. The fifth field is a textbox titled ISBN. Below the textbox it says “Please do not include any spaces or hyphens in the ISBN. The final field is titled Type of material. It has single-selection buttons for two options: Adult and Children’s/Teen.]

[image description: this image shows half of an unfilled web form written in black text on a white background. The first field has the title Format above it. It is a dropdown menu with the option “CD - Music” selected. The next field is a textbox titled Subject. The next field is a textbox. Above the textbox are the words “Where did you hear about this title?. Below the textbox it says “Give specific sources if possible. It might help us find more great materials”. The final field is an expandable textbox. It is titled “Additional comments”.]

the key things to remember when filling out the form are:

be specific if you need a specific format, translation, or edition! 

not sure if the format/translation you want exists? use worldcat.org to find out! their search engine has this handy “view all formats and languages”/”view all editions” option that lets you see what might be available. it’s not guaranteed to be exhaustive, but it’s a good starting point. note that worldcat categorizes books (incl. ebooks) as distinct from audiobooks. clicking this button on a print book listing will show me only other print and ebook formats, and clicking it on an audiobook listing will only show me other audiobook formats.

[image description: This image shows a worldcat.org search result listing for the book We Had a Little Real Estate Problem by Kliph Nesteroff. The listing tells us that it is for an English-language print biography published 2021 by Simon & Schuster. The listing includes two links. One says “View all formats and languages”. This link is circled in red. The other link says “View all editions”.]

speaking of worldcat, it can be a great place to find the publication information you might need to populate the form. that said, try not to stress too much about the ISBN. it’ll be different for hardcover versus paperback versus ebook and vary between editions. just focus on being very specific about it if you need a specific format or language to access it.

if your library’s form includes a comments field, this can be a good place to put feedback for context, such as “our library doesn’t have many books on X topic and I’d like more” or “I think this book is an important text for my program/major” or “I recommend this text to a lot of my students and think it would be good if it were more easily accessible”. this kind of information is very helpful for librarians trying to decide how to develop their collections.

i hope that helps! it’s not a very complicated process, but i wanted to make sure to provide some context about how library purchases can help authors, improve your accessibility options, and show your library that there’s a demand for books on specific topics! i also hope to provide some clarification about library privacy policies and making your voice heard at your library.

[emospritelet]

Manifesto - chapter 11

Last time, Sutherland offered Belle a drink in his office. Here's what happened next

[AO3]

-

Belle rolled her shoulders tiredly as she made her way back to her apartment. Her body was aching, as though she had been running for miles, and she wanted nothing more than to take a shower, put on her PJs and chill out. She stopped off for a bottle of wine, a bar of chocolate and a punnet of summer berries in the shop next to her apartment block, and ate a piece of chocolate as she rode the elevator upwards. It looked as though she would be dialling out for dinner. Perhaps a pizza.

Her phone buzzed as she entered the apartment, and she smiled as she saw Merida’s name flash up.

“Hey,” she said, tucking the phone between neck and shoulder as she put down the wine and searched for a glass.

“How’s it going?” Merida was almost shouting into the phone. There was background chatter and laughter and the clinking of glasses. “Did you hand Sutherland his arse yet?”

“We had a bit of a spat,” said Belle, twisting off the top of the wine bottle. “Just a minor one, though. Are you in the pub?”

“Yeah, me and Leroy came out for a sneaky pint or two.”

“Is everything okay at the library? I just got back to the apartment and I’m gasping for a drink, but I should really call Ariel.”

“She said to tell you everything’s fine,” said Merida. “Building still in one piece. Books safe and well.”

“Good.”

“Anyway, don’t change the subject! Tell me how the meeting went!”

“Oh, it was - well, it was exhausting, actually,” sighed Belle, pouring wine. “I’m not sure how much we actually achieved. Maybe I’ll know more tomorrow.”

“Did you give your presentation?”

“Yeah, that part went okay.” She took a sip of wine. “Some of the people there seemed convinced. Not the guy from the Treasury, but Sutherland says if it was up to him they’d never spend anything, so I’m not sure what I could have done to convince the man anyway.”

“And you left Sutherland in one piece?”

“Just about,” said Belle dryly, and hesitated. “I had a drink with him.”

There was a spluttering noise at the end of the phone, and Belle had a vision of Merida spraying Leroy with beer.

“What?” choked Merida. “You went for a drink with him?”

“It’s not like we went to the pub for pints and whisky chasers,” said Belle. “He had booze in his office. He offered me some. Brandy. Just a small one.”

“And - and what were you doing in his office?”

“Oh.” Belle chewed her lip. “I - uh - we were talking about the library. He’s released some grant money to local authorities. Should mean I can get some funding for the next year or two.”

“Well.” Merida sounded satisfied. “That was all his doing? What you said must have made an impression on him, then.”

“He says he just changed the eligibility, that’s all.”

“Was this before or after the drink?”

“Before, of course!”

“Even so,” said Merida. “Try shagging him, you might even get enough for a pay rise.”

“Oh my God…” Belle shook her head as Merida cackled. “On that note, I’m gonna finish this wine and take a shower.”

“Okay, but we want an update when you get back,” said Merida. “And hang in there, you’re doing brilliantly!”

“Thanks. Miss you guys.”

“You too.”

Belle hung up, taking another drink of wine and sighing loudly. She carried her glass over the couch, flopping onto it and letting her head roll back against the cushions. Merida’s teasing had had the unfortunate effect of firing up her imagination, and she wondered how many glasses of wine she would have to sink before she stopped having visions of the Prime Minister shoving her against the wall of his office and kissing her hard.

-

Sutherland had managed to get through the papers that Anna had left with him, and had scrawled notes in the margins indicating his preferred course of action from the suggestions given. He had a meeting scheduled with the US President at nine p.m., and a briefing paper had been set on his desk along with a cup of coffee, which was now cold. The door opening made him look up, and Anna breezed in, looking refreshed. He wished he felt the same.

“Oh, you’ve been through the papers,” she said, checking the folder on his desk. “Anything you wanted to talk through?”

“I don’t think so. Graham seems to have everything well in hand.”

“In that case I can give you these.” She slipped another folder out of her bag and dropped it on the desk. “Revised figures for the meeting tomorrow, along with a statement from Sir George about how we’re going to bankrupt the country if we agree to anything other than the status quo.”

Sutherland chuckled as he picked up the folder.

“I assume you’re exaggerating only slightly.”

“A tiny amount,” she allowed. “Today went well, I thought. Considering the competing interests.”

“And strong personalities,” he remarked.

“You always said a robust exchange of views makes for stronger policy.”

“As long as it doesn’t come to blows, yes,” he said, and it was her turn to chuckle.

“The lovely Miss French left you in one piece, then,” she observed, and he snorted.

“Just about.”

“I told her about the grant programme.”

“Yes, so she said.”

He thumbed through the papers once before realising he hadn’t taken in a single word, and hesitated before he spoke, feeling the smooth paper between thumb and forefinger.

“I had a drink with her,” he said, and Anna let out a tiny squeak of surprise.

“What, here?”

“No, we went to the bloody pub, what do you think?” he said impatiently. “Yes, here. She apologised, and - and I offered her a drink. Brandy. Just a small one.”

“Well.” Anna pursed her lips, a tiny smile lighting up her eyes. “Nice to see you two getting along.”

Sutherland grunted something.

“You did get along, I take it?” she pressed, and he sighed.

“We were very civil.”

“Civil is - something, I suppose.”

He made a non-committal noise at the back of his throat, pretending an interest in the papers, but he could feel Anna’s eyes on him, as though she knew he had more to say on the subject. Eventually he looked up.

“I told her about the divorce,” he said. “And - and about not wanting Ellie to work in Westminster, and why I got into politics in the first place. I was even honest about it. God knows why.”

“Hmm.” Anna pursed her lips. “Not like you to get personal with strangers.”

“I know.” He shook his head, turning back to the papers again. “She’s unsettling.”

“In what way?”

“In – I don’t know…” He waved a hand. “I’m not sure I understand it myself.”

“Did you decide this before or after the drink?”

“Oh, long before,” he said immediately. “Having a drink with her just made me – acutely aware of it.”

“Well, she’s only here tomorrow,” said Anna. “Are you going to the meeting? I managed to carve out two hours in your diary, but you don’t have to.”

He hesitated. No, he didn’t have to. No one would expect him to. He had more than enough things clamouring for his attention, after all.

“Perhaps it’s best that I don’t,” he said. “Ella can give the group a good enough steer, can’t she?”

“I’ll give her a call, let her know,” said Anna. “You sure this isn’t just because you’re scared of Miss French?”

“I am not scared of her,” he snapped, making her grin. “I just - I just have more pressing business than scoring points in a shouting match.”

“Speaking of, we have PMQs to prep for,” she said, and he groaned, slumping in his seat. “No rest for the wicked,” she added.

“Indeed,” he said wearily, running a hand over his face. “Alright. Let’s go through these papers, then talk PMQs, then I have to speak to Washington. And at some point I suppose I’d better get some sleep.”

“Optimism. I like it.”

He grinned, swatting her with the papers, and waited for her to pull her chair around to his side of the desk. It was best that he left the meeting to Ella, and concentrated on running the bloody country. There was certainly no reason for him to want to sit in a room with a bunch of people who couldn’t agree. He got enough of that in the Commons. A vision came to him: a pair of clear blue eyes flashing, the allure of a challenge, and he pushed the image away. Miss French was far too distracting.

-

Belle spent a restless night, disturbed by several unexpectedly erotic dreams that left her flustered and aching. She took a long shower to revive herself, and then went for a brisk walk to pick up coffee and a croissant, which she ate sitting on a bench overlooking a nearby park. It was still early, not quite seven-thirty, and she didn’t have to be at Downing Street until nine. One more day of fighting her corner and standing her ground, and she could return to Avonleigh with some small sense of achievement. The coffee was hot, and she removed the lid to help it cool enough to drink, hissing in vexation as she saw she had forgotten to add milk. The aroma was delicious, the coffee darkest brown, and she was reminded of Sutherland’s eyes watching her over his brandy glass, the tip of his tongue wetting his lips.

Shivering, she took a sip of the coffee, wincing as it scalded her tongue. A good thing the discussions would be ending that day. They would have further meetings, of course, but she had been assured that most of those would be held virtually. Time and distance would deal with her crush, and she could go back to running the library and having the odd disastrous date to remind herself why she was single. She just had to get through one more day.

-

Belle hadn’t expected to feel disappointed by Sutherland’s absence. She had told herself it was likely he wouldn’t be there; as Prime Minister he must have a hundred demands on his time that were more important than one policy. Anna was also absent, no doubt organising his day with her usual aplomb, and so it was left to Ella Deville-Waters to chair the meeting. There were more arguments about the scope of the policy, with Archie playing the role of peacemaker as Belle exchanged increasingly waspish comments with Sir George King.

By the time four o’clock arrived, she was ready to drop, and almost sighed in relief as Ella announced that they were done. She felt as though she had been wrestling live alligators all day, and rolled her shoulders as she shrugged on her jacket.

“It’s been a pleasure working with you, Belle,” said Archie, holding out his hand. “I suppose the next time we meet it’ll be online.”

“I guess so.” She shook Archie’s hand, ignoring Sir George’s baleful glare. “Thanks for the links to those papers you mentioned, I’ll be sure to read them.”

“Of course. Happy to talk through any questions you might have. You have my email.”

“I do.” Belle smiled at him. “Safe journey home.”

“You too.”

He smiled back, picking up his briefcase and heading for the door, and Belle shoved her papers in her bag, nodding to Ella. The sooner she got out of there, the sooner she could be home.

The air in the room had been dry, and consequently Belle was parched. She rummaged in her bag as she hurried along the corridor, fishing out a bottle of water that slipped from her fingers just as she reached the corner and bounced out of sight. She darted after it around the corner and squeaked as she collided with something warm and solid and smelling of expensive wood and warm cloves.

Sutherland had managed to keep himself busy enough that he hadn’t thought about Miss French more than perhaps half a dozen times. He had been pleased with himself, convinced that he would be able to put her from his mind completely once the day was over. That all changed at just after four p.m. as he walked from his office to the Cabinet Room. One moment he was talking over his shoulder to Anna, the next he found himself with his arms full of Belle French, her wide blue eyes staring at him and her lips parted in shock. She was pleasantly soft against his chest, her perfume drifting into his nose, but he barely had time to react before one of the Special Branch officers was there to peel her off him.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry!” she said breathlessly, upper arms held firmly from behind by the officer. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention!”

“That’s - that’s quite alright.” Sutherland nodded to the officer, who released Belle immediately. “I take it you’re on your way back to Avonleigh?”

“Yes,” she said automatically.

Her cheeks had begun to redden, agitation plain in the rapid rise and fall of her chest. It was painfully arousing. He kept his eyes on hers, his own heart thumping hard, and Belle licked her lips in a nervous gesture. Sutherland blinked rapidly.

“Well,” he said. “Encounters with you continue to be - bracing - Miss French. I wish you a pleasant journey. No doubt we’ll meet again.”

“I - yes. Thank you.”

She squeezed her eyes shut with a pained expression, then shook her head and stalked past him, shoulders stiff. Sutherland watched her go, short skirt wafting around her perfect legs.

“The Cabinet?” prompted Anna, and he shook his head, turning back to her.

“Yes,” he said. “Right. Yes.”

He fell into step beside her, his skin tingling from the unexpected pleasure of having Miss French in his arms. She had felt as though she belonged there and that – well, that was a dangerous path for his mind to take.