#i can never unsee this and i dont want to

[moonshynecybin]

au where marc DOES manage to get out to catalunya…. would it change anything in the long run i don’t think so but i WOULD enjoy vale forced to consciously lie through his teeth when he’s accusing marc of never being his fan remembering the little motorcycle shelf the whole time. just a fun lil emotional saw trap……. you can convince yourself he never loved you but you can never unsee proof of it!!

see the thing is i dont think vale genuinely believes that marc didnt have childhood pictures of him in his room i think hes SAYING THAT as a lil rhetorical tool to make marc seem evil. hes claiming well marc is sabotaging me!!! and people are gonna be like um isnt he obsessed with you ? and vale has to be like NO. hes a LIAR. and i am definitely NOT smashing his heart rn dont even worry about it. i ALSO think. much more crucially to the emotional picture in all this. that vale's definition of marc being a true 'fan' of his (which is REALLY what hes questioning here) would include marc rolling over for him to win that tenth title. which marc has absolutely not been doing. like he thinks if marc was an actual fan he would want him to win the championship even over his individual desire to win a race (FUNDAMENTAL MARC MISUNDERSTANDING. BOTH CAN BE TRUE.), nevermind that they are at that point in their nearly three year long relationship in fact friends equals and coworkers and that would never ever be something he would do for marc. but i digress. hes lost in the sauce at that point so all guns are really NOT firing higher logic-wise

[m-y--p-a-s-s-i-o-n-s]

David Tennant part from “Tell It To My Heart  - Juliette Lewis w/ the cast of Camping

[htchnr]

★ thrill of the hunt ❥ A. HOTCHNER.

➻❥ masterlist. ➻❥ patreon. ➻❥ kinktober masterlist.

🎃 KINKTOBER PROMPT ➥ hunting kink + unsub!hotch.

CW ➥ outdoor sex ⋆ unprotected sex ⋆ piv sex ⋆ semi public sex ⋆ creampie ⋆ slight knifeplay ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!

WC ➥ 1,8k. SONG ➥ tear you apart , she wants revenge.

SUMMARY ➥ he’s restless. he hasn’t been on a hunt in a while, in fact, since you’ve been together. you’ve never told him to stop, but you can sense he doesn’t want you to see that side of him, coming home late at night covered in blood that isn’t his. so you help him in your own way.

★ - © 2023 HTCHNR. do not copy, share or translate my work to this platform, or any other! - ★

he’s restless. he hasn’t been on a hunt in a while, in fact, since you’ve been together. you’ve never told him to stop, but you can sense he doesn’t want you to see that side of him, coming home late at night covered in blood that isn’t his. the novelty of domestic life suits him, he likes cuddling with you, lazy mornings.

tonight though, you watch his side profile as he reads, watch his eyes flick over the same page several times, unseeing. he fidgets his knee up and down and slides his hand over his jaw, tapping a finger against his top lip. he’s so handsome, warm looking, alluring, and you realize with a rush that goes from your head to your cunt that you want him.

“hey.” you say, breaking the taut silence of the room, he looks up from his book, blue eyes focussed on yours. “i want us to play a game.” he stares at you while you explain your idea, smirking first with amused adoration, then slightly patronizing as he tilts his head.

“hide and seek? with me that wouldn’t be much of a game honey.”

“no.” shaking your head you stand and stretch your limbs, reveling in the way his dark eyes track your movements.

“i want you to hunt me.”

he pauses, thinking it through for a second. “since you interrupted my reading you better run extra fast.” he almost growls then, his usually sweet eyes gone impossibly dark.

“get to running sweetheart.” his voice low and threatening almost.

“fuck fuck fuck” you mutter out loud, almost forgetting that the whole point of the game is for him to find you. suddenly it feels very real. after all, he’s a killer, using both stealth and skill. one girl is nothing to him, a speck of dirt that is easily rubbed out.

reminding yourself that this man loves you and would never kill you doesn’t stop the pounding in your heart as you pause at a fallen tree, wondering if you can fit inside. you realize the game is exciting you just as much, even though you’ve done this for him, to help his boredom, you feel simultaneously afraid and aroused— it’s confusing as hell.

when people hide on tv or in films it’s never so messy. you cringe as dirt slides over your skin from the tree, matted leaves catch in your hair and your legs are awkwardly twisted. still, you’re inside the rotted trunk, and you’re hidden, at least to regular human eyes. you don’t have to lay still for long before you hear him coming. he’s not attempting to be quiet, but is humming under his breath, almost taunting you.

“i’m coming to get you sweetheart..” he sing-songs and you bite your lip not to whimper.

his footsteps pause, and you imagine him, scanning the trees for any sign of you. the urge to see him in his hunter pose is too much and you peek out through a crack in the tree trunk, you can’t resist a look, even if it costs you the game. he stood, the darkness of the night swallowing him along with the darkness of the forest.

his attitude has changed, and he looks nothing like the soft, charming man you’re used to seeing everyday. his shoulders are tight, his hands twitching by his sides— his left hand hovering above his knife that sits in it’s sheath. he’s grinning, his eyes are two black focused orbs, sweeping the scene.

it is amazing to see him like this, and as he moves towards you in one smooth, animalistic movement fear combines with desire, licking up the bottom of your spine. almost ripping the tree apart he unearths you, pulling you out from your hiding place, his hands under your armpits, lifting you as if you’re a child, or a rag doll— the ice cold blade of the knife pressed against your throat.

“i told you to run” he murmurs, the look in his eyes is dangerous, his chest is heaving with panting breaths, his voice is rough and low and betrays his arousal even if you couldn’t see the outline of his cock pressing hard against the fly of his jeans.

“i did” you whimper as he glares and bends his head to kiss you unrelentingly, nipping your bottom lip viciously.

“not far enough, not fast enough.”

“i tried Aaron, let me up…” you struggle intentionally weak against him and he holds you easily with a snide look in his eyes.

“i won the game.. i should get my prize.”

“your prize? oh… “ you words dissolve into a shameless moan as he simultaneously bites your neck and the cold knife tears through your shirt, his rough hands groping your breasts and pinching your nipples. You moan as you move your fingers to his zipper, yanking it down and pull his aching cock out, hot and throbbing against your palm as you stroke him. his mouth falls open as he lets out a strained breath, moving his larger hand on top of yours to force you to speed up your strokes. he seems to want it rough, and you feel exactly the same way.

his hands hold you easily, cupping your spine as he shoves you down on a patch of dry leaves. he crawls on top of you, his hips jerking a little as if of their own accord. “put your hands above your head.” he commands with a raspy voice and you nod, following the direction, twisting them together as if bound, and looking up at him imploringly.

pinning you with a glare he kisses you again moving his hand inside your underwear— swearing when he finds you soaking, pushing two fingers inside you desperate to feel your heat, before he regains control of himself and moves them teasingly in and out, never quite hard or deep enough. “i see.. you like this, you like the chase?” he asks. you moan pathetically, eyes rolling back.

“i like being caught.” you pant, trying to grind down against his hand hard enough to get yourself off.

“turn over.” he groans. “if you like being hunted like an animal i’m going to fuck you like one.”

thrilled, you scramble on all fours, glad to be off the hard ground— you wonder somewhere in the back of your mind if he’s doing this for your comfort. he hovers over you and you hear the clink of metal as he undoes his belt, the sound sending an unexpected bolt of arousal through you, he pulls back on your hips so your ass is cushioned against him and pushes inside you with one smooth stroke, not waiting to let you adjust before starting to move. you cry out as he sinks in and out over and over.

you clench your eyes shut as you shamelessly moan. he grins darkly, moving his fingers between your legs and rubbing your clit as he plows deeper inside you. you scramble for something to hold but he just holds you, fucking into you and you have no choice just to let him bounce you on his cock, let him touch you until you feel as if you were about to explode.

“Aaron! fuck.. please..” you plead, not even sure what you’re begging for as he slides one hand up your throat, pressing the cold blade flat against the hot skin of your throat. your thighs pressing together make you feel even tighter to him, and the sounds leaving his lips against your ear, the filth spilling from his usually smooth and composed self even during sex gives you a clue he’s just as lost as you are.

“scream all you want, no one can hear you out here.." he mutters in your ear. His lips brushing against the shell of your ear as he urges you towards your climax both with his filthy words and the never ending stroke of his fingers against your sensitive bundle of nerves. bucking back against him you let yourself go, clenching around him and riding out the pleasure as you cry out, tears trickling down your cheeks. he holds you as you fall apart, pausing just to revel in the sensations before he picks up his brutal pace again, the knife being thrown down into the dirt as his arm reaches around your throat, resting against your shoulders.

he thrusts a few more times, his balls slapping against your cunt so deliciously as he finally comes inside you with a loud guttural moan, his warm cum painting your walls as he fucks it into you.

He pulls out, his sticky cum pouring out of your abused hole— dropping onto the leaves with obscene splats. he hovers above you on the forest floor for a few moments before he comes back to himself, realizing you’re both outside at night on damp leaves amongst bugs and god knows what else. he let’s out a shuddered groan as pulls you up. your knees shake shamefully and you lean into his solid side with a grateful sigh.

he helps you back to the house, shoving you in front of the fireplace, not speaking while he fusses round you, washing the dirt off your face with a warm washcloth, picking the leaves out of your hair and frowning at the scratches on your arms as if they personally offended him.

“i’m okay..” you reassure him, your eyes heavy with post-sex bliss. you wonder how you can convince him that you enjoyed the game and that you are not so breakable as he thinks. he knows you well though, and as he lifts you up to bed and pulls you on top of him, your head resting on his hot chest. he nips at your ear, sending a wave of lust through your exhausted body.

“we are definitely doing that again..” squealing quietly with glee you hug him tighter to you and slowly fall asleep, happy knowing you have a man who is willing to take such good care of you, but also fuck you into the ground with a knife against your throat if you ask for it.

TAGLIST ➥ @toastbrot8410 @mrs-ssa-hotch @fictionallifestuff @weirdothatwritess @crystalflwr @stella95827 @taintedstranger @mija-novella @gffesegjoiegj @bubbly-parker @mediocremalachor15 @goldenangelwingsandcandy @0nex-is-dead0 @2hiigh2cry @the-1n0nly @hotchsdharma @tgskitten @crystlroses @notforeverlong @emmeilyy @whatisthereality

[qoldenskies]

20+39+52 for the ask game pls <3 i love ur writing sm btw

20. Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

hUHhhHHHhhhHhhhh HHHH OH MY GOD I DO SO MANY REPEATING PHRASES/WORDS ON ACCIDENT AND IT MAKES ME FEEL SOOO INSECURE AND UNORIGINAL EVEN THOUGH IM PROBABLY THE ONLY ONE WHO NOTICES. canary continuity THANK YOU for being half repetitions/parallels/motifs so i dont have to think about it and can act like its intentional (some are, some arent YOULL NEVER KNOW!!!!)

^^^ dude i include so many parallels nobody has even noticed and i just have to keep it to myselffff CRYINGGGG there's like 40 miner's eulogy motifs in ch14-15 IM NOT HOLDING ANYTHING BACK NOPE NO SIREE

i just gotta read more i think. that'll probably fix the issue

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

YES SIR CHAPTER 16 CONTENT

"Mike, hey," Raph cupped his face so they would lock eyes. "Do you know where you are?" Mikey blinked. He sniffled, and his brow wrinkled in confusion. "I-I—" Raph could still hear Donnie crying, hear Leo's soft reassurances—like this, okay? one, two, three, four, hold, like that, and out. Just like that, you're doing great. You've got it, you're a champion—as he tried to talk him down from his panic attack. Mikey was shaking violently in his arms, his eyes unseeing and chin trembling as tears streamed down his face. He needed to get him away from here.

52. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i try to respond to everryyyyy comment i get when i can, even if it's just a thank you for it, even when they make me uncomfortable because i cant tell if theyre criticizing the characters or the quality of my writing (big reason ch15 came out so quickly ngl... some of the response to kitsune made me nervous because i was already worried about revealing her), just because i love comments and praise very very much and i want to make it known!! also i just love the excuse to yap when it's given to me, even though im worried i come off as. ANNOYING lol

i get that worry a lot more than you'd think. i honestly always find it weird when people react to my presence like im somehow admirable because i always feel like the underdog kid making a fool of himself...,,,,,. i have social anxiety tho so its just me PFTHAHAHA

[ohbo-ohno]

https://www.tumblr.com/ohbo-ohno/729211936036765696/httpswwwtumblrcomohbo-ohno729206658953347072

Johnny scares you out of hiding, only for you to stumble right into Simon :((( they were 95% certain you’re blind, but now they know 100%, and Johnny is just absolutely gleeful about it, begging Simon to keep you bc wouldn’t he love having such a pretty little thing entirely dependent on them??

🌚 (I could go all night with this)

you should go all night with this. sorry for the slow response btw im watching rpdr again

original ask for this

you're sooo scared, and made even more scared by the fact that you can't see anything, can only hear what they choose to let you.

maybe there's another little entrance to your spot, one simon positions him at. johnny gets his hands rammed into your hidey hole, is able to just brush his fingers against you and get you screaming and scrambling away. you sort of fumble along the walls of your hiding spot, end up falling out into the open air unintentionally.

you can't even get your feet beneath you to try and run before a pair of hands scoop you up under your armpits. you scream again, legs kicking desperately and trying to throw your weight backwards.

there's a laugh in front of you, a little shake to your hanging form. it makes you want to curl up into a tiny ball, makes you feel vulnerable in ways you never have before.

you hear the other man trot up behind you. "got her?" he calls out.

"hmm," your captor hums in affirmation. "ran right into my arms."

"sweet thing," the scottish one laughs, and you feel a hand run over your head. it makes you flinch, has you ducking your head low with a shiver. "look at you, even prettier out here where we can see you. dirty thing, though."

"you can give her a bath when we get home."

you finally get the nerve to speak, giving a little kick forward. "no, let-lemme go-"

there's a click of a tongue from in front of you, another shake to your body. your mouth slams shut with a click, your legs falling still. "quiet, bunny. you're fine."

"be nice, si. poor little thing's heart probably can't take much more."

"she'll have to learn how, if you want to keep her for yourself."

your head jerks over your shoulder for a moment, unseeing eyes scanning nothing. "keep- what? no, no, please i don't... please, i-"

"hush," the scottish one says, stepping right behind you so his front is pressed to your back. "can't start panickin' so early, bun, you won't survive the walk home."

you're hauled closer to the other man's body. you try to leverage your feet on his body, kick at his stomach and try to get him to drop him, no matter how useless the fight feels.

he rumbles low in his chest - almost a growl against you - and pulls you tight to him despite the kicking. another hand worms between your bodies, brushes your feet away like nothing and leaves you hanging limp again.

"let's head back," the one holding you speaks. "she'll probably go into shock soon, don't want to be out here for that."

"no, please, i dont want-"

"shh. you're comin' home with us. we caught you, we're keeping you. nothing you can do about it now." the one holding you says again. his straightforwardness saps the energy from you, leaves you keening a low sound and letting your body become dead weight.

"there we go," the scottish one murmurs, another hand petting over your head. "good little bunny."

[fictionfixations]

genderfluid (& androgynous)

someone called riddle genderfluid and now i cant unsee it

(imagine its a fem day. and he just sits there with a skirt. and radiating dom energy. my minds too stuck on bamf ladies. also you dont have to wear a skirt if you dont wanna, i just like em. but uh. its like a superiority thing. (bruh imagine someone bumps into them- or.. wHATEVER pronoun. uh. fuck. i said them for riddle cause im too used to he/they characters. wtf pronouns do i use for him??? uhm. but so someone bumps into riddle. and then they just blurt out 'pls step on me'. and hes like wha? [cuz he comes off strict and intimidating, but hes also sometimes clueless/oblivious, poor sheltered bby] and then they eep and run away hehehehe ...imagine he asks cater what that meant [because cater knows a lot of weird stuff]. cater spits out his tea like WHAT. HUH? actually LMFAO- 'i never expected to hear those words come out of riddles mouth! and he said it so straight-faced too!')

..i have a hunch you probably thought id put 'step on me mommy' but

im. kind of not a fan of the sexualization of those words cause now i can never unsee it when its just an innocent version

i feel like.. riddle has a lot of problems with his mom. one including not wanting to be too similar to her, or being compared to her (and regretting that he'd basically become a mini-her for awhile there, although in more serious words)

(also how do genderfluid people do pronouns?? [i have no gender so i dont get it] ive seen in some writing they use like. she/her on a she/her day. or he/him on a he/him day. but could you also just... stay to another pronoun too? i mean. theres probably she/they and he/they that works there. she/he does too. ..is it she/he? or is it she/him? probably she/he. idfk. i mean. i have a bias towards he/they. but like. if you're leaning more towards feminine.. do you match feminine pronouns too or is it just based on how you're feeling and it can really just go either way??? i kind of want to write a genderfluid riddle in a purely self-indulgent way. but i dont know what to do about the pronouns or if i should change them)

anyway

maybe thats my bad cause i like referring to him as a queen instead of a king (HE WEARS HEELS TOO. we love a short king. LMFAO)

(he wears heels because the queen and the first heartslabyul housewarden wore them. and his uniform is modeled after the first heartslabyul housewarden. this is iirc mentioned in his halloween vignette)

this is future me

he could definitely just be androgynous too and not afraid to use it

like

okay

spoilers for a JP card but

here. (a card i desperately want in the future, even though ill probably never actually use him)

which since we're here. vil. with his androgynous energy. who is also referred to as a queen. .........

honestly. i dont think he really cares that much about either way? or. that. i think im wording that wrong

like.. wearing dresses or suits, i dont think it makes a difference to him. for 1, he knows he rocks it. 2, assigning things to 'female' and 'male' and then saying the other cant wear things the opposite does is dumb (i still refer to them as feminine or masculine to differentiate them, my issue with it is then restricting it)

so he just. sometimes

to prove a point, wears short hair (or something that leans a little more towards masculine-y) with dresses

actually he kind of does that already

its just a coincidence LMFAO

i think its just more to fit the occasion

cause in this his hair is tied up

also damn this mfs pretty

anyway i think thats enough vil LMFAO

i got so off topic

[calumhoodgoss]

been listening to rebel at heart thinking about how it yes it’s 100% a ashton song but could be a calum song yk? and insomnia gives way to some lite psychoanalysis and I was thinking, calum has this lovely quietly unhinged, rebellious even, personality and it makes sense he tends to be drawn to people with kinda unhinged personalities too or at least those who are boldly themselves and that’s not quite the path of what they’re ‘supposed to’ be. but also how sad it is whenever a louder personality drowns him out because he’s truly got so much to give and he does give it but he is quiet too and it’s like, you’ve gotta not steal his spotlight. not think because he’s on the quiet side he’s got nothing to say or express because he absolutely does. it’s such a sweet combination but it must be so hard to fit the bill of someone who works there really well. all the band members do in their own ways I guess and I do think that’s a big part of what makes 5sos so successful—and especially if ashton did in any part write rebel at heart for him (I don’t know, it doesn’t really matter, but it absolutely describes calum and I can never unsee that). but in terms of a partner. I just hope whatever happens whether brandy does end up learning how to be that for him and they do end up being together in the future or he keeps looking, that he finds someone who’s just the right balance for him. I can see how that would be hard though for a lot of reasons but he absolutely does deserve that and I just hope we can talk about and appreciate this and really see him for who he is yk? idk if this is the style of ask you like but I just wanted to say hopefully nice things about calum

oooo i actually havent had a chance to listen to blood on the drums yet! but you bet your ass ill be running to do that after readimg this!

i just quickly read over the lyrics and i can totally see how you see cal in them. if he didnt help write them then i feel like he would at the very least relate to them for sure. i 100% agree with you on that one, hes definitely quiter but not less expressive.

and i agree! i hope either brandy can be that balance for him or i hope he can find someone who will be. i have my reservations about brandy (and for those reasons i dont think theyll work out) but at the end of the day whoever makes him happy is the best one for him. he just deserves someone who inspires him and also understands him and his timing and expression, whoever that might be!

its just exciting to see him be more interactive and present online again - whether thatd because of a breakup or because hes getting ready to do some kind of promo, whatever it is we LOVE to see him being himself again

ALSO

this blog is all just speculation and ive specifically chosen tumblr to express all my thoughts cause the chance of the boys or anyone they know ever actually coming across this are so so so low. im more here just to talk about all the things i think about with people who understand and are interested and dont have people in the real world to speculate with either 😊

- not that you implied anything i just thought this was fitting to add 😇

[nerosdayinanime]

thinking abt sabito lives design again & i started putting him in situations and reminded myself of my hc that he does origami in his off time

my original vampire!sab outfit idea, his white haori's sleeves seem kinda short on him as a 13 yo ghost so actually growing to 21 hed probably need to extend it, so why not recycle his funky pattern shirt for it? yellow-green geometric pattern along all the edges, and for a sabito lives in place of giyuu au why not attach his red haori on the inside

something something sanemi stopping by the water estate for whatever reason, sabito being a good host asks if he wants some tea and starts to leave to make some, "where are you going? thats tea there isnt it?"

"not the kind you'd want. its mushroom tea, the funky kind."

"the hell are you drinking that for!?"

"lets me see ghosts."

"...you're sick in the head."

"not wrong, but thats not even top five of reasons why."

them chilling drinking tea & talking abt nothing and after a bit sabito starts smiling at thin air, theyre still talking but he keeps glancing over at nothing and when theres a lull in their convo he turns to talk to said nothing "why are you being so quiet?" (i never see you talking with anyone....i dont want to interrupt) "but i like talking to you.." (you can keep talking with him, i'll still be here) a little huff before looking down at the drink in his hands

"who are you talking to?"

"my best friend."

-

sabito coming home from a nasty mission and doing his usual wash-up routine & finally sitting down in the main room. then The Horrors hit. (FuckingfailureWasntfastenough) eyes unfocused and unseeing, (BlueeyesLongblackhairSofuckingyoung) world closing in and feeling like its about to explode all the same, (ScreamofdeathSilenceNofuckinghead) thick tears pooling around his forehead pressed to the floor, (WEAKTOOSLOWFUCKINGIDIOTWRONGDECISIONBLOODONYOURHANDSBRAINATYOURFEETBLOODBLOODBLOODBLOOD)

"SABITO-SAN!?"

the lady housekeep he hired finding him unresponsive curled up on the floor face down hugging himself while shaking like a leaf, freaking the fuck out thinking hes dying of shock or something- pulls him to sit upright leaned against the wall, try and fail to see if hes hugging himself bc of a wound bc hes just. fucking holding onto himself so tightly. white knuckled muscles locked in place. sends a crow to the butterfly mansion for an emergency and sprints to get the nearest doctor, they arrive and hes not moved from where she propped him up, doctor checks his eyes and sees they respond to light theyre just not looking at anything, tries a few taps on the face and the housekeep worriedly calling out for him. nothing. doctor apologizes for what theyre about to do before slapping the Absolute shit out of him.

knocks him over and his hand suddenly snaps out to latch onto theirs to a painful degree, eyes focused and full of fury before it shorts out to confusion. he blearily lets go of the doctor and hisses at the stinging pain in his face, "the fuck hap-ppened?"

"you were hugging yourself on the floor- and you wouldnt respond- you were just shaking!"

"what do you remember?"

(BLOODBLOODBLOOD)

he recoils slightly and shakes his head, "g-give me a minute. fuck.."

"take as long as you need"

focusing his Breath as he haphazardly scrubs his eyes dry with the edges of his sleeves, leaning back against the wall. just breathing for a moment.

"I came home. took a quick bath to-" (wash off the blood) "wash. changed clothes. sat down to do- ..something.."

"do you not remember what you sat down to do?"

"not like that- whatever there is to do. Something. anything. i usually do origami.."

doctor talks yadda yadda makes sure he doesnt have immediate brain damage or actively bleeding wounds & leaves with their promise of another doctor on their way

"sabito-san..? what exactly happened..?" he softens a sad look at her

("my mother used to help keep this place up for the man before you." he smiled, "eh? your mother kept the place intact for my mentor. how nice that you're here to help me out now, ne?")

"bad mission, ("oh..") there was a young boy. i fucked up, the demon killed him." he inhaled through his teeth, "i had to tell his family while covered with his brains."

she recoiled, reached out to lay a comforting hand on his shoulder, "im so sorry..."

he let his head loll back against the wall, "its fine"

"its not..."

"its not. but it is what it is, and its over with."

"...kocho-sama should be on her way."

he quietly groaned, "thank you. ...was it that scary?"

"you usually hide it with some sort of smile. i cant imagine how you do that if its bad enough to make you look like youre dying when you cant stuff it away anymore.."

"heh, sorry to scare you like that..."

"dont be. talk to kocho-sama and see if she can help you. i just dont want you to be in so much pain.."

he smiled genuinely at that, "you really help. talking with you and helping with chores makes it easy to smile."

easy to forget that hes alone. easy to forget pretty piercing blue eyes, what they look like wide with fear and never what they look like in death. blood that tints his memories old and new. blood that he coats himself in, blood he refuses to wash away- blood thats all he has left of him.

-

sabito has a little stall at the end of the market in the nearby village, just big enough for himself and a few bundles of paper, out of the way of the busier sections. most people pass seeing how he only has a few paper figures and a bunch of colored paper to sell. a few stop by, intrigued by what he could possibly be doing here.

"whats your favorite animal?"

they answer, he picks out a piece of paper and starts folding, he gives them a little guy

"you never said how much??"

"i dont need money, i just do it 'cuz its fun. want another one?"

people bring their friends to get a little paper creature, talk and laugh, enjoy their new little guys. it makes him smile.

a lady walks up, cant name a creature so he suggests a surprise animal based on her, "sure." he starts folding, eventually she recognizes it "an elephant!?" "yeah," not really looking at her as hes finishing it, "theyre kind animals, 'gentle giants', but theyre still very powerful. predators have to pick off the sick or young because the healthy adults are too strong to be brought down. smart too. i also read that theyre matriarchs- the oldest wisest female usually leads the herd. she shows everyone how to be an elephant, where to find food, how to navigate their world, safest places to travel. she's their guide and teacher." he sets it down closer to her, "you make me think of an elephant."

"oh," she looks at him stunned, "thank you."

he smiles, "careful not to squish it, if you do though i can just make another one for you. have a nice rest of your shopping trip."

[cakebatteronabrickwall]

this is random and very late, but ngl i still feel like s4 was such a good roman season like right until the finale, his ending and kendall and shiv’s were unsatisfactory in different ways, as in, no one won (obviously) but roman’s conclusion in comparison feels a bit? less impactful? i felt like there had been a build up to something bigger (character-wise, not like an in-universe win) and then ? and i dont think it was just me bc throughout the release i saw this expressed a lot, by casual viewers as well

and sure one can say “he’s just not as important” and leave it at that, but i never felt that to be the case, and still dont but then jesse’s vision on the character only made it all more confusing lol

Don't worry, it's not random! But I hope, by asking me, you know you're in for a worryingly long answer.

First of all, Jesse Armstrong's vision and interpretation are his own and I don't think it matters very much in the grand scheme of things. I'm not saying this in a resentful way (really not!), but he seems to see these characters through the lense of season 1 and, I would argue, there is a very significant shift in the second half of the first season in how they are written and the path they are intended to go down. Problem is, Armstrong is the only one they kept asking after the last episode aired, and I can't fault him for a) being stuck with the original read of the characters and b) having comperatively less complex views on Shiv and Roman, because it kinda makes sense to me that he would have more to say on Ken. For example, Georgia Pritchett has talked about queerness in these character before, I don't think I've ever heard anyone else mention that. And so on. Essentially, there are other writers and actors who made the characters who they are, more so than him.

With that out of the way--yes. I do agree that season 4 gave Roman (and Shiv) so much more to do, all in all a great season for everyone not named Kendall Roy, lol. For Roman especially, I think it did what had been an ongoing theme since season 2; which is to really break him down and disassemble him as a character. I think it's really interesting to look at Roman's overarching arc in the show which, to me, is about sort of finding back to his actual personhood. He is told he isn't real (and fair enough, a lot of him is a performance act), he is told his past and memories aren't real or not important, and so on.

Season 4 is the first time the disjointment of Roman is made much clearer to even more casual viewers and I think, once you see it, you can't really unsee it. You want there to be resolution. And I understand that it might be disappointing to not fully get it, but I do think it's there. Here is the thing- If you accept "finding back to his actual personhood" as Roman's series arc (and you do not have to), then how does it conclude? At the funeral, right? We, as observers, have understood that it was never about the firm for him, but his father. His father is gone, and while he holds onto him in form of the firm, he finally comes to this breaking point of letting grief in.

Like, everyone saw him break down, there is no going back. More importantly, he doesn't really seem to want to go back. The final episode for Roman plays a little like a mixture of epilogue/prologue, if that makes sense? Epilogue: the end of an era (waystar), a shift in the sibling relationship (maybe not for long though). Prologue: someone who has genuinely begun the grieving process, finally in a position to let go, who knows what lies ahead.

The last episode isn't really an ending anyways, it's just where we leave the characters be. Do I think Shiv and Roman could have carried another season? Yeah, honestly. Shiv, because there is a lot of narrative plot possibilities (and hey, I do so want Shiv and Tom to reenact The Great), and Roman because he would have found himself in a completely new position. I'm tempted to say a sort of progress/healing moment would be inevitable in the future. But maybe that's the problem; Succession isn't the kind of show to portray that. They would have found a way, surely, but it would have been a very different direction.

[belog-grada-crna-princeza]

even if i do recover from my illness and even if things ever do get better and i survive this and don't k1ll myself in the near future.. even if i stop being depressed. even if all my dreams come true by some miracle. i will never. EVER. forget. because i thought i knew hell but i didn't before this. this world we live in is hell. believe me. no matter what social media shows you with the gummy lollipop pinky pink rainbows and unicorns. nope. there is so much evil, injustice and cruelty that can never be forgiven.

like that quote: “If there is a God, He will have to beg for my forgiveness.”

i can never unsee what i've seen and unknow what i know and it has forever killed my innocence and changed me as a person. i have seen how "loved ones" leave you at your worst. how people abandon you because you cant do anything for them anymore. how they say you're not alone and they're there for you but it's just pretty words. how medical professionals and mental health system and every institution hurts people and can't be trusted. how it's every man for himself. how people avoid you when you're in pain because youre "bringing them down". how society turns away their heads from everything unpleasant and just pretends it's all good. how all fights for justice don't amount to any sustainable progress and millions suffer every day for no reason. how full of spite and envy and ill-will people are. how most of them judge you too easily if you dont fit some rulebook they've invented for you. how no one actually has empathy for one another even though it's the most popular f*cking word these days and everyone is an Empath. how people say things that make them sound good but never actually follow through.

i am sick of talking. i googled a step by step how to successfully un1liv3 myself (i even have to censor these fuck*ng words now) bc i failed in the past and i don't want to be stopped this time and they gave me.. su1cid3 lines to call. i laughed. what a joke! talk to who?????? tell them WHAT????? be put on some sh*tty ass drugs or in some stupid institution just to go back to this hell. i dont want to be brainwashed. even if things get better i can NEVER forget what the world actually is and what society is.

i will never forget and i will always know. f*ck your fake positivity and brainwashing with nicely wrapped up lies. the world is f*cked up

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Gale's Thoughts: My Adventures with Superman

So I recently saw the first episode of the show, and my first impression was that I liked it a lot but something a miss. Then I rewatched it to get a better grasp of the characters. And I decided to give my thoughts on it.

Superman: Clark Kent. They nailed the Country boy from Kansas. The kind hearted and Naive Clark. The guy doing his best to blend in, sure. His adorable and dorky nature, nailed it. But that also is the problem, Clark kent isnt accidentally Clumsy, he is intentionally clumsy. He had YEARS of experience with his powers and your telling me he cant even keep his shoes from ripping? Like, its one thing if he's nervous, but Jimmy even points out they keep having their alarm clocks break, this is not an unusual thing. Thats my only pet peeve with it, aside from that he is pretty spot on. I am more forgiving of his superman persona not being there yet (he has yet to figure it out, thats fine).

Lois Lane: Its Luz from Owlhouse

Just make her slightly older, and change the artstyle and bam! Luz Lane.

I didnt realize it on first watch, but after the rewatch, its so blatant I cant ignore it. And its not only the looks, its the hyper active personality to! The not really getting what authority figures are telling her, the obsessive drive to chase what she wants to do, dragging others into her shenanigans, but mainly its her approach on how she gets information, a kids news paper route? I dont really buy it, I can see the argument that Lois would Leverage ANY and all connections she would have, but this just felt a bit ridiculous. Lois is a snarky all business girl that can banter and pursues her story, she can be flirty and be headstrong, the one thing she never is, is awkward. I cant envision this as young lois, Maybe future episodes help fix that but right now this is just Luz Lane.

3. This one is a nitpick but

Who approved this haircut? You want me to take this person seriously? Someone please alter it. It doesnt make her look cool or mysterious. It looks like her parents put a bowl on her head and then got lazy. Aside from that the character is fine, but I just cant stop laughing at their hairstyle.

4. Jimmy Olsen is fine, but if I had to

To be fair, he doesnt look that much like Gus, but he reminds me so much of him. Its not a nitpick because quite frankly Jimmy has always had different personalities depending on the medium, but I cant unsee gus after I realized how much Lois looked like Luz

I still find the show fun and I am willing to watch more later on, but I just noticed some things I cant unsee.

[ohlookapan]

BG3 and their fave classic novels (at least what i thought at 4am) Karlach: Frankenstein (she read it growing up and liked it but now it feels bittersweet when she rereads - but she feels like it makes the book better somehow now that she relates to it more) Laezel: Catch 22 Gale: The Great Gatsby or Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy Astarion: Catcher in the Rye (i dont know why it just feels right) Wyll: anything by Jane Austen (explains why he acts like a regency love interest) Shadowheart: Charlotte's Web (denies that she even knows it exists but she always cries when she reads it) Halsin: The Secret Garden Jahera: The Alchemist

These are all so perfect are you kidding me-

Your answer gave me a few ideas of ones I might change, but they're very few. I do want to share my thoughts on all your answers though because damn are they good and give me a buffet of food for thought.

Karlach: I'm actually furious I didn't think of Frankenstein, the symbolism is unfathomably perfect.

Lae'zel: She's always been a tough one for me to think of, so I'm so happy to hear Catch 22 as a suggestion. Honestly the phrase itself sums her (and Shadowheart) up pretty well; Either abandon your faith and start fresh (conveniently lost, if you will), or stay with a faith that you know or have an inkling might be morally wrong/deviant and have to live with it for the rest of your life. I love the idea.

Gale: Hitchhiker's Guide. No question. He's definitely the type to finish it in 2 weeks and secretly write fanfiction or self inserts for things and never tell anyone (maybe Tav or Astarion finds them and bullies him about it--but they can't judge since that's what daydreaming is for lol).

Astarion: Gatsby, which you suggested for Gale, is honestly a good one for Astarion. I definitely think he can relate to Jay--wanting to throw your life of pain and nothingness away to become something totally new and forget that old life of yours, no matter what the cost is--and think he definitely picked up on the queer-coding thing pretty fast (he believes it, I imagine). I think he could think of himself as Daisy does: "A beautiful little fool."

I also can see The Picture of Dorian Gray being a good one. I made a post about this in the past but I will never turn down an opportunity to talk about it; I feel like he'd be SUPER into Oscar Wilde and the way he views the world. To me, it fits his aesthetic and flowery dialect almost scarily well.

Catcher and the Rye though, definitely. He carries a worn out copy of that book EVERYWHERE. It's like a teddy bear to him. Maybe that's what he's reading all the time at camp?

Wyll: This is the best one, oh my Gods. I've never thought about it but now I can't unsee it during my playthrough. The almost flowery elegance he has is definitely Austen-coded. Beautiful.

Shadowheart: THIS. I definitely think Charlotte's Web boosted her love for animals, but I also think it helped her figure out her own personal thoughts about death, outside of Lady Shar's teachings. Given how much I think the book would impact and mean to her, I can totally see her naming a pet Wilbur or Charlotte.

Like Halsin, I think The Secret Garden also fits. Her love for Night Orchids, as well as the idea of there being something more out there than what meets the eye--something more beautiful than anything anyone could imagine, and something that completely takes your breath away and makes you forget about everything--is EXTREMELY appealing to her, I'd imagine. I like to think she notices Halsin reading it and walks a bit behind the group to talk about the book with him (lord knows the minute someone knows Shadowheart likes something so sweet like that, it's over for her (especially Astarion)--Gale though would totally keep it in mind and find a gold-foil copy for her).

Halsin: The idea of him sitting under a tree or something and reading The Secret Garden kills me in the best way. Maybe he's reading it out loud to ducks or squirrels (then the group hears him and gathers around for circle reading time because his voice is PERFECT for reading aloud (I think his VA even did an audiobook? Don't quote me on that though)).

Jaheira: Yes. Just... Unequivocally yes. Nothing more to say. The Alchemist is so accurate.

[scaly-freaks]

eversince that au where you used billy idol as reference for aegon... i cant unsee it lol.. was listening to eyes without a face earlier today and it truly does remind me of aegon & amara 🥹 most specifically when aegon is sad and depressed over her pppfff i especially love and find the lyrics 'got no human grace' entertaining because i can imagine aegon saying that to amara casually in jest because it fits his humor, but also because the way he thinks of her has always been something that transcends humanity 🤧 i probably dont make much sense, but it's fun to think of the lyrics and how they relate to his feelings for amara or can be interpreted... 'got no human grace' just has a few aegon esq trademarks to it idk 😅

Billy's just gorgeous, isn't he? And he's so true to himself, I love hearing him talk (he's like TGC in that sense, they're both very open about who they are and what they want, so I guess my type may be blonde men but a very specific format).

Urgh I love that song btw!! Him telling her she's got no human grace when he thinks she isn't returning the true depth of his wretched love is so *chef's kiss* Half the time, he considers it a crime against himself if she isn't dribbling and crying over him the way he is over her (get a grip, Aegon).

Also no, you make perfect sense, I love this little parallel. Have you heard White Wedding? The hey little sister refrain could be seen in many different ways, but with Targs, it's very on the nose I suppose. Any other man telling Amara that would be like brother euggghhhh but with Aegon, it's romantic because Targaryens are meant to consider their siblings the ultimate devotion/attachment. When he names her little sister (she is four years younger in the TGOWARL fic) it's his desire to be bonded to her so close their DNA could never be separated.

Also these gifs from the music video, especially with the marriage coming up are just so fitting:

[deutoplasmic]

now im thinking about tanuki s4 and mame and their turf war with kitsune 97-99 line,,, and your laundry shop is their declared neutral ground,,, questionable stains everywhere

LMAO I MEAN IT CHECKS OUT BC I THINK EVEN INI AND THEIR FAMILIES SHIP KIMUNISHI 😭 i mean if they dont want fengfan ill gladly take him-

YEA I GET YOU so many cpop boys use 儿话 and im stuck there squinting at the subtitles to see what they said 😭 AND OMG A FELLOW RAISINS ANTI LETS GO 🤝 and HDNDJD that makes sense tbh!! whatever gets the bills paid and keeps you well fed 😤

omg now that youve pointed out the koshin 周深 comparison,,, i cant unsee it omg,,, smol vocalists,,, also i find it funny how koshins name is 香信. 因为 whenever i watch their content where they have a challenge or mission. 我不相信他 LMAODJDKD (affectionate)

i dont usually make clothes 😭 its hard to justify it when my country is so hot. but i have some tank tops and a thin scarf for when i go to chillier countries!! other than that i mostly like plushies or keychains ^^

OMGJFKFJF DORK RIHITO,,, KICKING MY FEET RN hes such an awkward bean and i feel like his sister would give you all the material you want to tease him

omg you know TAN 😭 i never got into them in full because a SODA friend advised against it because they said it would just stress me out 😭😭 changsun is cute though. but if you’d like a nugu group recommendation. may i suggest hi-fi un!corn 👀 i love their vocalists. i might make another song recommendation list in a bit too hmm

oh my god you're so right magical realism au would be so cool.......... you're profiting big time AND get to enjoy the awkward moments when two of them come in at the same time and glare each other down but have to be cordial out of making a good impression on you............. they keep making backhanded comments about the other group to you so you get all perspectives of their squabble

OFC LOOOOOL transcends not only the fans but the family as well 🤣 i mean. so real. let's go

YEAH im not built for it. but also i feel like i lose 80% of my chinese skills whenever engaging in smth not involved with my parents .... 😰 BUT YES you get it omg 🤝🤝🤝

YOURE RIGHT LIL GUY VOCALISTS i'm pretty sure 周深 is shorter than me or smth too.... OK. I HAD TO LAUGH AT THE PUN. reading japanese people's names in chinese is a necessary skill i think

omg wait are you part of the region where winter is basically a pipe dream and humidity is an everyday situation 😰 it is so funny to me how you classify thin scarf and TANK TOP (!!!!!!!!) as clothing for colder countries LOOOOOL. ok but anigurumi is so cool its just so much effort bc you have to do a bunch of singles 😔 my respect 😔 i'm sure they turn out super cool though!!!!!!!!!

as an older sister i can totally vouch for the giving blackmail photos. and it would be so funny. let him have a breather he's not good at this 🤣

yes..... du du du .... heartbeat ...... hypertonic (!!!!!!) ...... all so good...... i never really got into the group itself but i always listened to their comebacks 🙏 also sorry but what is a SODA. the only soda i know is soft drink lmfao .........

WAIT IVE HEARD OF THEM!!!!!!! they're fnc ent's latest bg band right?? haven't listened to any of their songs yet but i'll go spin their title tracks!!

[hopelessly-romanticly-here]

I will never understand how people can cheat so shamelessly but also claim to love you so much. I've been in this situation for years now and I'll continue to be in a relationship with them. Whether they finally put an end to it is up to them. I don't know. I've tried so many different compromises, spending extra time together. Not that we don't already. More intimate time. Being more honest and open. Roleplay, including a trauma kink born from all of this.

my partner did not waste any time before cheating on me the last time I found out. I've had very bad physical reactions to previous instances in the past, but this has been the worst. My health in general has not been ideal, but finding out. seeing everything that I can't unsee. I thought I was going to have a heart attack and I went, and still am, in a very dark place. I won't say how exactly. But please know that I'm safe, I'm trying to be.

The really sad part is that I'll never stop. Maybe I'm obsessed or overly attached. But I don't care. I don't want to stop. It hurts me more than any traumatic event in my life. But I love them. And I don't want to stop.

How fucking sad is that?

I know that I'm stupid. I've been told that my whole life. I'm stupid and lazy. And maybe it's true, maybe it's more like I dont care for my needs and dont get enough accomodation. But whatever. I'm stuck. Maybe that's okay. Maybe I deserve it.

[liliallowed]

okay like if seeing papyrus is so important why can't dust see MY FUCKING HALLUCINATIONS. MY ADHD.

my fucking intrusive thoughts.

if I can see his he can obviously see mine so like.

are we just like going crazy together? voices just collectively spitting shit at us?

you could argue paps is a ghost...

but that would mean dust actually never killed him and pspy is basically a ghost monster like napstablook rn...

which like... okay? but not really because skeletons are a different species of monsters???

sure ig. I think ghosts are actually born as ghosts. I don't think a dead monster can just be a ghost in the Undertale universe-

still... EVEN WITH THAT.

my question is if you could perceive him does that mean YOU'RE PROJECTING HIM INTO ACTUAL EXISTENCE AS A SLEEPING GOD?

IT'S SUCH A MISSED OPPORTUNITY. LIKE IT'S ACTUALLY A TWUST THE PHANTOM PAPYRUS WASN'T ACTUALLY REAL INTIL THE SECOND (inactive)ANOMALY SHOWED UP.

and like kinda manifested him into existence with the power of will/dark fountains?

cuz that is in fact a very real thing.

I imagine the light and dark Ballance in dusttale s deltarune is also completely fucked up with how the player obsessively dove into fantasy and escapism... something the dark fountains FEEDS ON...

I think dusttale actually might be partially being slowly devoured by the dark world.

shadows are cutting deeper. darker yet darker...

layers of reality unfolding as the puppet dreams of being the puppet master.

the dolls longing for free will and "freedom"

vengeful toys questioning why they were abandoned. was it them? or was them being forsaken actually a blessing compared to those "beloved " by an Angels grace?

YOU COULD HAVE HAD SO MANY FUCKING COOL TWISTS WITH ACTUAL LORE DIVES BUT NOOOOOOOOO

u just wanted sexy times with batman over there and apparently child abuse???

WHAT THE FUCK DUD FRISK AND CHARA DO WRONG DONT HURT MY BABIES!

listen stab player in the fucking skull they deserve it BUT NOT THE FRIKING KIDZ.

BRO 😭.

BRO THEY'RE A VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCES TOO JUST LIKE DUST STOP FUCKING BEATING THE FUCKING CHILDREN.

then proceeds to make out with mc again... 🤦

then goes back to stabbing the child...

yk you're not actually making him hot rn right? he feels like a perverted old man in the woods that just likes killing people and abusing children and apparently not even a hi or a hello just straight up just making out.

kick him I the balls I don't care if he doesn't have any. I will SHOVE TWO BOWLING BALLS IN HIS PELVIS AND SMASH IT WITH A SLEDGE HAMMER-

Okay. I'm done.

anyways besides my points the fic is okay (like 5 percent of it is actually inspiring for LV triangle n reader's role in a fictional narrative as a semi self aware but still in denial god...)

I do not see it. 😌 I will unsee this fic