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dogcopter · 5 years ago

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Jane is Lore 2020

Ok, here’s the round up of the ghost part of the situation with @keepbeachcitysafe and @keepbeachcityweird.

Theory: Ronaldo’s girlfriend Jane is the key to figuring out Rose Quartz is not gone, largely via a constellation of background clues. If that sounds ridiculous, I understand. I’m Ronaldo. Actually I’m not Ronaldo, but hopefully I’ll have a post about him too soon. I hope we can all have fun together tho

This post is very, very long and involves a lot of images. It will be confusing at first, but please entertain the thought and keep reading, and I hope it clicks into place. I may need to update it later.

Three sections for supporting evidence:

1. Restaurant Wars, Jane, KBCW/KBCS blogs’ interaction & contents

2. Astral projection/ghosts/fusions

3. Dogcopter secrets

Restaurant Wars Saga & Jane’s appearances

So Ronaldo has a blog at @keepbeachcityweird - he also published a book based on his blog called Keep Beach City Weird: You Can’t Hide the Truth!!!, which is available for purchase.

On April 23, 2014, Lion 2: The Movie airs. Jane appears for the first time working the ticket booth at the movie theater and sees Lion and the kids fight a killer robot. Dogcopter 3 is playing at the theater.

April 23, 2014, Ronaldo at Keep Beach City Weird also posts about seeing Dogcopter 3 at the movie theater, where the parking lot is a mess, presumably from Steven, Connie and Lion’s robot training fight.

He mentions “First of all, it’s a huge mistake to turn the last Dogcopter book into THREE movies.”, but that’s less relevant to this particular post. The important thing is that he, like Connie, follows Dogcopter, who’s also associated with Jane. (We’ll get to Dogcopter’s appearances in SU in the last part of this once the context is established)

Ronaldo’s posts in general document specific events and details in his home Beach City, but that’s another post entirely.

Exactly a year later, Ronaldo on April 23, 2015 posted about receiving a mysterious letter, which might be from Jane because (beneath a great deal of smudging) it appears to call Ronaldo the CUTEST GUY EVER! (This isn’t crucial or anything, just noting it as one of our first Jane points).

I GOT A LETTER TODAY!!! But for some reason it was all wet and I can’t even tell what it says. Is it a love letter? Is it a death threat? Please tell me! I need to know if I should lock my doors or open my heart!

Jane also appears in Beach City Drift. After Beach City Drift, keepbeachcitysafe posts an episode reaction blog, on July 22 2016, and takes special notice of Jane.

Hey did you guys notice that girl that keeps appear. We saw her when Steven took Connie to the movies and now she’s here. I wonder if she’s involved in something. Hmmmm. So Stevonnie raced Kevin down the hill in his Himitsu X12, that’s secret in Japanese.

(Kevin’s Himitsu X12 is his car, in the middle there. We’ll come back to this and what KBCS means in a second.)

July 25 2016, Restaurant Wars airs, the third of Jane’s four appearances in SU. In this ep, Jane comes a long way to return Ronaldo’s Koala Princess DVDs, and catches Ronaldo with Kiki and is upset.

KBCS posts another episode reaction blog, pays attention to Jane again, and says they plan to message Ronaldo.

Ronaldo says he can’t do it because of his girlfriend. Ooo, he has a girlfriend, that’s pretty cool, you just know whats gonna happen next.

Ok so, Ronaldo’s, GIRLFRIEND, (imagine me saying that in slow motion) showed up at the worst possible moment.

Everything was back to normal. Except poor Ronaldo, I should sent him a letter to cheer him up. Seen ya next week.

Almost immediately the KBCS and KBCW blogs play out a little interaction online:

Ronaldo goes through some stuff.

No post today. If anyone needs me I’ll be at Brooding Hill… where I’ll be CRYING. I usually cry at Crying Canyon, but it’s closed right because of some flash flood warnings.

Then Ronaldo posts KBCS’s letter.

Note how KBCW caps this message so the name is clearly visible? It’s referring to Ronaldo’s bio:

It’s not very cheering...but things work out shortly thereafter. Jane likes one of Ronaldo’s posts and all seems well.

I think it’s going to work out you guys. Thanks for all your support.

After this, Ronaldo doesn’t post again until Rocknaldo several months later, and one last time after publishing his book.

That’s April 18 2017. The KBCW tumblr is never updated again. KBCS’s final post is not long after, Jul 4, 2017.

Finally, Jane makes a cameo alongside Ronaldo in the very last scene of Steven Universe Future, “The Future.”

Koala Princess, Astral Projection and Psychic Ghosts

So some interesting patterns come up when you connect the two blogs, the clues associated with Jane, and some understanding of Steven’s powers. Let’s revisit Keep Beach City Weird, a Ronaldo’s primary blog, and Keep Beach City Safe, which contains mysteries too big for this simple Dogcopter/Jane-hime lore post.

Keep Beach City Weird - Ran from September 2013 to April 2017, with a lot of posts made in October 2015 and July 2016.

Keep Beach City Safe - Ran from June 2015 to July 2017, with most posts in 2016 of course.

Let’s look at a timeline of posts. I’m going to call out things that we’ll connect to the Jane lore at the end.

Keep Beach City Weird: Ronaldo’s blog

Nov 1, 2013, days before Steven Universe first airs: KBCW’s first post is all about Astral Projection.

Astral Projection! The ability to travel outside your physical body and into other planes of existence!

I began to feel lightheaded and before I knew it, I was floating above my body. Amazing! I walked out onto the boardwalk in my new ASTRAL FORM, and you know what the weird thing was? Nobody even said hello to me. I was COMPLETELY INVISIBLE! I mean, usually nobody really notices me, but this was a different kind of not being noticed. This was not being noticed on another plane of existence - so I didn’t feel bad about it.Anyway, after being ignored in the arcade and Fish Stew Pizza, I got bored and I went back to the fry shop to re-merge with my body.

Astral projection is a power Steven demonstrates a number of times, and you’ll see among these posts that certain powers of Steven involving this stuff are called out by the blog.

Connie: What? Where are you? How are you...? Steven: I’m not sure, but I think it’s a classic psychic ghost type situation. Connie: Ah, of course! So, what’s the plan?

from Reunited

Steven: Oh man. I fell asleep and had this weird dream. I opened the door and Lapis was there, and- Pearl: Well, that doesn’t make any sense. Lapis is fused with Jasper at the bottom of the ocean. Steven: You’ve never had a dream before, huh? Pearl: Uh, I don’t think so.

from Chille Tid

August 28, 2014, Joking Victim, Ronaldo posts about ghosts. And an arsonist from about 150 years ago.

September 04 2014, Steven and the Stevens, Ronaldo posts about "cross dimensional travelers”

And all the cross dimensional time travelers I know don’t want to go on the record about their experiences.

Not mentioning posts that don’t mention ghosts/astral projection/dimensions in some capacity, but in realtime Ronaldo liveblogs in response to episode events.

Ronaldo also answers some fan asks. On October 31 2014 after Keep Beach City Weird he answers this question about floaters with “BACTERIAL GHOSTS” in all caps, this one about his first encounter with the supernatural (the events shown in Horror Club, which aired February 12, 2015)

Nov 2014, Ronaldo posts twice about Watermelon Stevens and a review of the anime Soul Blaster, “Like every anime, Soul Blaster is about a high school student. Our hero is a cool dude, with even cooler hair named Kyosuke. He battles rogue spirits with the help of his Soul Blaster - which happens to be powered by the spirit of his deceased younger brother, Kettaro. “

On December 4, 2014 Ronaldo posts about Koala Princess, who will become important in this post when we get back to Dogcopter and Jane. Koala Princess is repeatedly used as a stand-in for talking about Steven’s journey. In this post Ronaldo says:

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Ok, so I just finished the final episode of Koala Princess and I don’t want to get too emotional on you guys but I CAN’T STOP CRYING! Koala Princess goes on a walkabout and enters dreamtime and finally MEETS HER KOALA MOTHER FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! SLKDJFSDJ:FS

I’ve got so many feels! These feels are the real deals! On wheels! WHAT AM I SAYING?! I’M GOING CRAZY!!!

Lion 3: Straight to Video aired on the same day as Ronaldo’s post. In this episode Steven meets Dogcopter in a dream, and then sees his mother Rose Quartz for the first time - she speaks to him via a VHS tape.

After Alone Together, Ronaldo posts about Stevonnie, who is a fusion. He also gets stuck under a fridge for a bit after Future Vision in January 2015.

And I want TO GET OUT FROM UNDER THIS FRIDGE!

He posts like five times about it in the same day because he’s freaking out.

And also I want my body to be shot into space with a print version of my blog so an alien civilization can find me reconstruct my body and worship me.

On February 19 2015 after Winter Forecast, he posts about using time travel to fix bad decisions:

Sometimes I think about all the bad decisions I’ve made and how they’ve affected my life, and I wish I could go back in time and change them. But unless I can find a way to break into the Pentagon and steal a time bike, I’m just stuck with having regrets.

After Political Power Ronaldo claims glowsticks are filled with ghost blood.

Anyway, then stuff happens.

January 4 2016, after The Answer, Ronaldo posts about seeing Dogcopter 4 and shares the poster for it.

One interesting thing about the poster is that if you invert it and mess with the contrast a bit, a strange diagram appears on the left. A true mystery.

And after months of avoiding and spoilers or teasers or trailers, I was in line for Dogcopter 4, and then some dummy walking out of the theater TOTALLY SPOILED EVERYTHING and was like, “I can’t believe that Dogcopter’s parents are actually cats.”

Coming back to Dogcopter in a minute, but these are relevant details.

Dogcopter dies defending the planet but then he comes back to life because he’s actually part cat and cats have 9 lives.

On Jan 5, Steven’s Birthday, Ronaldo posts about celebrating his birthday on a different date every year.

Every year, I celebrate my birthday on a completely different day. Why? To keep my birthdate a SECRET so that no clandestine government agencies can steal my identity!

July 2016, the saga with Jane and KBCS above happens. When he’s sad about Jane breaking up with him, the same day Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service comes out (in which Steven astral projects into Kiki’s dream), he listens to sad music.

Ugh, I wish I had some sad music to listen to at work. All I have is a playlist of video game soundtracks and some EVP recordings of ghost hauntings. I guess ghosts are sad. I’ll just listen to those.

But if you’re feeling happy, I do suggest listening to the “Go-Go Gorilla Go-Go Kart Racing” soundtrack. Some solid 16-bit J-reggae.

This post may partly be a reference to the Sadie Killer song G-G-G-Ghost, which is performed in The Big Show and wouldn’t air for a bit, but is also astral projection related.

Why can't you see me? Why can't you see me? I think I might be A g-g-g-ghost. Can't you see that I exist? And I don't need an exorcist To let me out Look at me and I'll appear Why can't you see that I'm right here? That I'm right here? Why can't you see me? Why can't you see me? I think I might be A g-g-g-ghost. I'm calling you from the other side

Once Ronaldo has gone through grief and anger, he resorts to begging her to come back. This post is from July 28, the day Alone at Sea aired in which Jasper begs Lapis to return.

Much like Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle in Season 5, Episode 13 what you saw on the Boardwalk the other day was not what it seemed. I was only pretending to date Kiki to defend my family’s honor, just as the Kanga-ronin did in Season 1, Episode 3!

Here is another Koala Princess reference. There are a couple SU references in the episode numbers in this post.

The events of Season 5, Episode 13 of KP was not what it seemed: for Steven Universe, this is Your Mother and Mine, in which Garnet tells a story told to her by Rose Quartz. It later turns out to be a false origin story to cover the truth that Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond.

Kanga-ronin pretended at something to defend family honor in Season 1, Episode 3, which in SU is Cheeseburger Backpack - where Steven buys a novelty backpack so he can carry things on missions to be useful for the gems, fails his first mission and pretends he’s fine. The events of this ep are later referenced in The Test.

Finally, Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle is a reference to Stevonnie’s vision in Jungle Moon, which is Stevonnie’s first interaction with Pink Diamond via a memory dream. In this dream, all was not as it seemed either.

Then the KBCW blog doesn’t post until Feb 2017, after Rocknaldo. A couple ghost and dream-y quotes from here:

In my searches for THE TRUTH, I’ve done a lot of listening. I’ve listened to haunted houses to hear ghosts from other dimensions. I’ve listened to radio signals from the cosmos for signs of alien life.

I’ve also learned that HUMANS NEED TO SLEEP. I didn’t sleep for 48 hours and I PASSED OUT FOR DAYS.

Ronaldo’s final post is an ad for his book, which comes out during a hiatus, and he references Koala Princess again:

I did have a little help from some fellow truth-stigators I met on a Koala Princess forum, Ben Levin and Matt Burnett, but most of the work was definitely done by ME!

Now let’s look at Keep Beach City Safe.

Keep Beach City Safe: [???]’s blog

For KBCS, I’m only going to skim to address ghost/astral projection related content that comes back to the business with Jane, Dogcopter, Koala Princess and Rose. The rest of this blog is a little too big for right now.

It’s interesting that KBCS seems to have mostly flown under the radar, but between the Jane arc and a couple other things I believe it to be legit. Suffice to say I’m treating it as real and you will see why in a minute.

For KBCS I’ll mostly mention which episode a post is associated with, but not the date like with Ronaldo’s.

KBCS’s reaction blog to Nightmare Hospital includes a couple relevant lines:

Where was the Gem M.? I heard footsteps behind me. I turned around! It was mom!

Don’t tell me It’s on the other side of the hall corner. That would mean it saw mo- Connie’s mom!

KBCS posts a blog between Too Far and The Answer, in which they review a number of events. (They post another blog about fusions in which they describe Garnet and Stevonnie’s components as well)

During the movie the TV just shut down and they were being chased around by a “ghost”. It was actually a gem stuck inside the house, making the house seem like it was possessed.

They also get pretty excited about Steven’s birthday.

Only a few more minutes until Steven’s Birthday!

Eeeeh! Only a few mins left until midnight. We finally get to learn about Garnet’s past! Are guys happy, I know I am. I can’t even express how happy I feel, but I’ll try. And I will not act crazy while doing it, Imma keep it cool. So it’s like Peace and Love had a son, and his name was Steven! Then Steven fused with Connie, who was the daughter of Happiness. And they formed Stevonnie, who was made of everything right within the universe!

On Steven’s Birthday they also post about the Dogcopter 4 movie.

I’m gonna be a Smart Spoiler and drop hints in my post for you guess. Only those who have watched it will notice the clues. Yep, watching it 9 times.

This clearly references Ronaldo’s post about Dogcopter having nine lives, but KBCS is a little more considerate about spoilers.

In KBCS’s “It Could’ve Been Great” post, they’re still talking about Steven’s birthday. There’s a promo image attached as well.

To start things off I just wanted to say: I did see Steven turn into a baby? And I would also like to say: DID YOU SEE STEVEN TURN INTO A BABY!?!?

So, by now your probably wondering what the second image is aren’t you? We clearly it’s a pic of Rose holding a cupcake candle.

We, here at Keep Beach City Safe, thought that Steven would’ve liked to have his mom at his birthday party. Happy Birthday from all of us at KBCS. Hope you like it.

Future Vision reference. (Some of this is less relevant to the Jane thing but I’m pulling quotes that are related to fusion and stuff in the hopes it gets clearer)

This reminds me of the time that Garnet gave Stevens her future vision. I don’t know what happens exactly, but I think you see what’s going to happen in the future hence the name future vision. Being able to see into the future would be awesome, yet terrified at same time.

There’s a great post about Pie Day - in fact, KBCS posts about Pie Day a few times. They call out Pearl, too, which reminds me of a certain prolific fandom video editor’s handle.

You know who else knows about Pi. Pearl, but also Peridot.

Pearl Doesn’t Like Pie. Happy Pie Day!

This is not a good photo of Pear let’s see if we can find a better one. Now that’s better.

Sorry for the tangent. Let’s talk koalas now.

KBCS posts about The New Lars. They have thoughts about Steven’s ability to hop into other bodies, namely the question of whether Rose could do this as well.

Steven is worried that Lars isn’t being truthful about his feelings. So through his dreams, Steven jumps into Lar’s body, and trys to make his life better. But he only makes things worse.

Steven somehow possessed Lars’s body through his dreams. He’s done it before and he’ll do it again, we have a word for it now: Dream Possession. But he can also enter dreams.

He did it with Lapis, the Watermelon Stevens, and now Lars. That’s one gem, one sentient plant, and one human. Well with lapis he was merely communicating with her. This, new power, is seems to activates itself whenever Steven wants to help someone, but can’t because something getting in the way. Could this be a power passed down from Rose, or is this a power he himself posses?

#koala vs sloth

in The New Lars, koalas come up twice. Koalas in SU are associated with Steven’s astral projection powers. Remember how Koala Princess met her mother in the dreamscape?

Steven: For your consideration...The koala, a marsupial from the forests of Australia, and the sloth, hailing from the forests of South America. Who should be crowned the king of the "Hanging Around Doing Nothing" mammals!?

Steven in Lars’ body: Whatcha doing? Hanging out? Buck: Yeah. Steven: That's cool. Would you say you hang out more like koalas or sloths? Uh, I'm asking for Steven.

Steven: Um... I'm really, really sorry about yesterday. I got you a card, it's got a koala and a sloth.

From The New Lars. Steven references koalas three times.

KBCS gets to Beach City Drift. They take notice of Jane and of Kevin’s car.

Hey did you guys notice that girl that keeps appear. We saw her when Steven took Connie to the movies and now she’s here. I wonder if she’s involved in something. Hmmmm.

So Stevonnie raced Kevin down the hill in his Himitsu X12, that’s secret in Japanese.

So while we’re back on the subject of Jane, here’s something interesting about Dogcopter and the Himitsu X12. They both show up in advertisements together in the background of Empire City.

Mr Greg

Same Old World

This is what KBCS is talking about - Dogcopter has a secret.

For Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service, KBCS has more to say about dreams.

She has a nightmare and Steven, coincidentally, falls asleep after eating and enters Kiki’s dream. Now Steven The Dream Warrior, must help Kiki battle her dream, and finally end this nightmare once and for all.

Steven, who for some reason keeps going into people’s dreams, goes into Kiki’s dream.

Steven fought for about week, and he’s was tired by day four. And we know from experience that a sleepless Steven, is a cranky Steven.

This is the same power Steven used in Chille Tid. and look who showed up again?

After Monster Reunion airs, KBCS posts a liveblog and includes a far-fetched accusation that Rose Quartz is Pink Diamond.

Think about it! A Diamond should have access to all gem controlled tech, right. And if Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond, which she is, then she should be able to too, right. And Steven has Rose’s gem. So now Steven can access gem tech. And one more thing to prove this theory once and for all.

But there’s one thing that doesn’t add up. Rose Quartz… is a Quartz. How could she be a Diamond?????? Maybe I’m wrong, she could have been just working along side Pink Diamond. Maybe this just a crackpot theory about the impossible. I don’t think gems can turn into different gems? who knows, I guess we’ll find out sooner or later.

When KBCS gets to Crack the Whip, they take note of Lion and tag him thrice:

Crack the Whip! Is it just me or is that foreshadowing?

Oh, did I mention that Lion was there. He was just there, when Connie opened the door, he walked up and just started hanging. It was so cool! It was like, Just Lion Things 2! So the snack break, that takes the whole day, ends at the beach, where the idea originally began.

Amethyst faces off Jasper, gem to gem, while Steven and Connie, and don’t forget Lion, fight the corrupted gem.

Lion was keeping the Gem Monster busy while all of this was happening. I was so stunned when Steven and Connie fused, without doing a fusion dance! How well they worked, together, they rode on Lion, and defeated Jasper, and poofed the Gem Monster all at the same time!!!

#just lion things 2 #lion fights #lion still fights

There’s also a weird Google Slides slideshow connected to the KBCS account, which includes this image featuring Lion, Tiny Floating Whale, (and Connie and Greg) and the word TRUE with Steven’s affirmative!

More Koala Princess

Two more Koala Princess references - although only one is immediately relevant -

In Gemcation, Ronaldo keeps texting Steven about Koala Princess. Steven’s lockscreen is a selfie with him and Lion.

Also, as a sidenote, Koala Princess is implicated in sneople trolls on anime message boards.

Dogcopter

These are just the Dogcopter appearances (Thanks to SU wiki as well as my brain) Dogcopter fights robots in at least one timeline, and the book is allegedly really long. Bold Dogcopters are the pink dogcopter, everything else is an ad or grey.

Lars and the Cool Kids - Poster

Lion 2 - The movie they all go see.

Lion 3 - Gives Steven advice.

Chille Tid - Shows Steven how to find Lapis. Meows. (Dogcopter’s parents are cats.)

Same Old World & Mr. Greg - Advertisement

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service - flies Steven away.

In Dreams and Growing Pains (Note this is grey Dogcopter) - Flies away in Stefan’s nightmare, proposes to Drew the driver (or at least offers them something) in the Dogcopter 6 Till Death Do Us Bark I Now Pronounce You Man and Woof trailer.

Snow Day - Pupcopter, a spinoff for babies.

And for Steven’s Birthday - Connie points out a Dogcopter constellation.

Astral Projection

Another quick summary. I’ve written a lot on this psychic ghost stuff so check my blog if you want the tags, idrc. Summary of astral projection powers Steven has shown:

Leaving his body (Reunited, Escapism)

Possessing other bodies (New Lars, Escapism, SWI)

Traveling to others’ dreams (Kiki’s Pizza, Chille Tid)

Interacting with fusion components within the fusion’s mind (Chille Tid, Mindful)

Regarding KBCS’s question of whether Rose could have done this, it doesn’t seem impossible - and as of Fragments and Homeworld Bound, we know that Gems don’t die when they are killed. (Lol.) That is, the personality/soul can appear in the same gem if it’s shattered and repaired. And Steven’s mom’s gem is perfectly intact, inside him.

Literally what is the point of all this

So after KBCS and KBCW spent so long talking about astral projection, ghosts, dreams, fusions, etc etc. they never actually got to the point - just pointed us in the direction of a bunch of clues that

Rose Quartz isn’t gone.

Obviously. She’s in his gem in him, like Lapis and the mirror, or the lighthouse gem. She uses astral projection to help Steven in his dreams as well as see him in Rose’s room, like other fusions speak in the mindscape. (There’s a lot more to this but this is enough to ask anyone to wrap their head around atm)

She also interacts with him through other bodies, the same way Steven takes over Lars’ body, or the Watermelon Stevens.

Remember this?

We, here at Keep Beach City Safe, thought that Steven would’ve liked to have his mom at his birthday party.

Who came to Steven’s birthday in which Connie points out that Dogcopter constellation?

Who gave Steven advice when he wished he could talk to his mom?

Who showed Steven where to find the tape?

Who else could have asked Steven, “What do you want” in Susan Egan’s voice?

(Why did they choose to hire Susan Egan to voice a cameo in Under the Knife in the first few seconds of Fusion Cuisine, where she says “It’s my son!” while Lion is onscreen)

Or reassured him that Rose’s tape was telling him the truth?

Who first brought him to Pink Diamond’s moon base?

Who knew where Rose’s armory was and how to train with it? (Note the giant penny)

Who showed Steven the location of Pink’s fallen palanquin?

Who found Rose’s lost scabbard?

and knew where Pearl would run to when she’s upset?

Who (reluctantly) brought Steven to the landfill and Pink Diamond’s ship?

Who showed him how to find Malachite?

Twice?

Who showed him how Pink Diamond tried to stop the Earth’s colonization, and who to ask for the truth?

Who tried to entertain him on Mask Island when he was trapped on Homeworld?

And then rescued him from the open sea?

Who showed Stevonnie the password to Yellow Diamond’s moon base?

Much like Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle in Season 5, Episode 13 what you saw on the Boardwalk the other day was not what it seemed.

So yeah Rose is Lion 2020. Thanks for reading this extremely long nonsense.

Also thanks to @babybeetlebongos for both mindscape lore and fixing Ronaldo’s cheek in the banner image, lol. I made a Twitter thread about this as well (and the more in depth Lion and astral projection theory threads are quoted at the top, if you need them. the #mindscape deeplore 2020 tag/tags on this post have stuff too.)

#steven universe theory #steven universe future #su theory #steven universe #rose is lion 2020 #mindscape deeplore 2020 #jane lore 2020 #kbcs lore #dogcopter #lion the mood #rosedemption 2020 #would you believe this isn't even the deep part of the rabbit hole??? im tired tho #i hope i left enough info for others to get into KBCS if anyone cares #i love this fool rose quartz

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grapesodatozier · 6 years ago

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requests list/queue thing

to the anon who asked for a second part of “as long as we’re together”: you are so sweet!! thank you!! unfortunately, my requests are teeechnically closed for the semester, the ones i’ve been posting this week are ones I said I’d post in january or february but couldn’t bc of school. i’ll definitely get to it in the summer tho!! i just wanted to say that i really appreciate when people like something I wrote enough to ask for me, it makes me v happy and honestly emotional lol, so thank you!! i really appreciate it!!

i’m also gonna list all of the requests that are in my inbox rn so you all know i haven’t forgotten about you lol (and so you guys can know what’s to come in the next few months!) the list is under the cut!!

1. reddie fucking while eddie’s on the phone with his mom (i honestly might get this one done this week but i also have literally like 300 pages of reading and an essay to outline and start this weekend so I make no promises lol but we’ll see!)

2. “really hard core BDSM” wheelzier (yes i quoted that one bc i loved the wording lol yall are wild and truly think i’m kinkier than i am but i LOVE it don’t worry lol) (also this one will probably be longer, so it’ll take longer for me to write, but i know a lot of you mentioned you were looking forward to it so i’ll do my best to work on it!!) (also also i want yall to know that my heart ascends to the high heavens every time i get a wheelzier request so im so glad yall are as excited for this as i am)

okay i numbered those ones bc i also said i’d have them done by february and here we are in mid march lmao

i can’t say in what order these next ones will come out, but i will get to them all eventually!

au where richie is dating eddie in one universe and mike w in another, and the two richies switch universes “oh and also richie is hung like a horse, please and thank you” (whoever sent that you are so right and also you’re my hero lmao)

beverie fluff turned smut

eddie comes w/o permission during a scene so richie doesn’t let him come the next time

hanzier proposal, fluff to smut (i’ve never written hanzier before, and i’ve only read it a handful of times, but i’m gonna try my hand at this!! if you’re wondering what ships I’m most comfortable writing, they’re listed in my about! but also I’m usually willing to step out of my comfort zone, so feel free to request any ship you want lol, worst case scenario i’ll be like ‘nah, sorry, not into that’ and refer you to someone who is) (but anyway yes i’m going to write this lol)

bev/max

reddie-centric poly losers smut

richie’s in a bad relationship and is actually in love with eddie. eddie drunkenly confesses to richie that he has feelings for him so richie breaks up with his crappy s/o

a second part to ‘as long as we’re together’

also people mentioned that they’d be into madzier and madwheeler if i wrote smth for those ships so i’ve started some madzier smut, which i am so excited for omg

so yeah, that’s what i’ll be working on for the next however many months lol. thank you all so much for your patience!! i seriously really appreciate that you guys like my writing enough to trust me with your ideas lol it means so much to me, so thank you!!

#requests

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nibscribs · 6 years ago

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So uhhhh I drew a lot of RWBY this year... only two of these are non RWBY and tbh I could have just as easily put something RWBY for June Template

Retrospective under the cut bc it’s LONG

RETROSPECTIVE January: First piece of the year! I still like this piece and I think it shows how much I improved from the original version of it. Also I just like looking at it bc it's soft content of my rare pair. I do think I made the rose look photorealistic which looks... bad esp with all the other more stylized flowers, and I got lazy with the bleeding hearts by just drawing one set and flipping them. Emerald's hair also could look better. February: I made this around GNG week, which was a fun, good time, long before the server imploded on itself. I got really lazy with the backgrounds, obviously, but I do like the poses in this one, tho it helped that I based it off of screenshots from Young Justice. I also just really like how Merc looks in this one. March: March wasn't a very prolific month for art, I don't think I produced much besides this and one comic piece for GNG week. I'm not sure why exactly, I can't find any specific reason why I would be unproductive that month. I'm gonna just assume I was drained from work all the time and didn't have the energy to put out good art, and also I was getting into a slump bc all my art was starting to look same-y. This piece isn't very good, but I chose it because I did it without a reference, and at this point that was going out of my comfort zone. It's obviously not super dynamic, but at the very least you can tell I intended there to be motion to it. April: This also wasn't a very prolific month for art, not as bad as March, but for the same reasons. I was also really starting to feel burnout from the RWBY fandom, specifically wasps and conflict within the GNG server. This was also when the Art vs the Artist meme was popular, and I realized I didn't want to do that meme because my art was too similar and boring, which also brought me down a peg. Though I put out a few good chibis in April, I chose my Mercury redesign bc I was really proud of it. I could never get the Emerald redesign to mesh quite right, but I can say I'm really proud of how Mercury's came out. May: May had me bounce out of my art slump and in full force trying to expand my skills! Specifically exploring painting. Although May was about as prolific as April, what I did create I put a lot into. It was difficult to pick between this and my app of Edison, because I'm really proud of both, but in the end I went with this commission of Mercury because I pushed myself to try and use an interesting perspective for the piece instead of my usual stand still and face the camera pose. Because I pushed myself out of my comfort zone, this was one of the best things I made all year, and may be my favorite piece of the year. June: TIME TO STRESS OUT ABOUT CONNECTICON! So if you follow me on twitter, you might have noticed I made a lot of posts at the beginning of the year low key throwing shade at myself for drawing my oc's instead of more "important" art. Well, that important art that I was procrastinating was con merch, and con was the second week of July, so I really had to get my ass in gear to finish merch on time (spoiler, I didn't finish a lot of it on time). This piece and July's piece are both posters I made for Connecticon, and while I like July's much better, that doesn't mean I find this piece bad. I really should have known that no one at con would realize it was a goonies reference tho -_-; I also lost a lot of love for this piece after season 6 of Voltron, which I watched while I was about 60% of the way through this piece, so I had to force myself to finish it. July: I love this piece!!!! Don't get me wrong, I know it has flaws, but look at it! The lines are so crisp, the colors look good, Roman and Merc's expressions are mwuah chefs kiss, and I just love all of them!!! ... except for Neo. I really didn't do her justice in this piece, her hair is too fluffy, her head is way to oversized to the point that she looks like a bobblehead, and her eyes are too close together. Really if you take out Neo's head that whole problem goes away. I also love all the tiny details I put in this one, from emerald's chaps to roman's rose to Neo's lace parasol. You can tell I was way more passionate about this piece than I was about the Voltron piece. August: pretty sure this is when I quit my job cashiering, and thank god bc customers suck. If I was going off of sheer popularity, Chibi Pyrrha would have taken this slot no contest, and while I love chibi Pyrrha, I don't think it was the best of the month. I chose this little princess and the pauper au doodle because I tried a year ago to draw these two dancing, and it looked like dog shit. It was flat and ugly. But this has motion to it, and even looking at it now makes me feel warm and happy inside. It's just a good cute drawing of my otp. September: My piece for the RWBY tarot project! I have a lot of mixed emotions about this one. on the one hand, I love how mercury looks, his expression, the lighting, the visceral gore from his legs (ESPECIALLY THE VISCERAL GORE ON HIS LEGS) and the hands of the undead, all look stunning and I don't think I could be more happy with how they turned out. And then we get to the background. The caduceus isn't the worst thing ever, but it's severely lacking in quality compared to the rendering on mercury in front of it, and a lot of it is clearly pixellated from me trying to stretch and squash it just right. And the fire is a hot (no pun intended) mess. It's flat, incoherent, and doesn't lead the eye anywhere. It's a shame too because I wanted to do more with it, but I a) didn't have enough time or patience to figure out what I needed to do to fix it and b) didn't want to go outside of my comfort level, so I gave up and decided to be satisfied with what I had. October: October was another good month for art, I made a turnaround sheet for Moss, painted a full body (and slightly lewd) Rudy, and made a decent attempt at inktober. Ok, so I got like 2 days in, but I improved a lot on inking from last year! Fun fact! this piece was originally going to be fan art of Lindsay Jones, but after I did some thumbnails to figure out a pose, I thought it would suit White Diamond better, and I could also sell it as merch. I love this piece. I think I captured the sinister mood well, and conveyed the story I wanted to without any dialogue (at least the notes on Tumblr make me assume I did a decent job, lotta people really wigged out lol) I really worked hard to get the lighting right on this one, and I think it shows. My absolutely favorite thing about this piece funnily enough, is Amethyst. I think I just did a great job drawing her and I'm proud of myself ok. Stevens bubble and my trouble figuring out how to get WD's leg just right are the only things that I dislike about this piece, but I might go back and fix those. November: IM SO PROUD OF THIS COMMISSION!!!!!! I worked so god damn hard on this chef's kiss poifect, and it really shows. I started using a new brush at this point, the Ojing series on Clip Studio Paint, which I recommend and have been using a lot since. I've also been using this shading technique since drawing this. I love how it sort of fades out but it's still really crisp. I also love all the little details that give this piece character, like her shoes and the stripes on her jacket. This piece really takes a lot of the stuff I learned over the year and combines it into one piece, and I could not be prouder of it. I have absolutely no problems with this one, though I do find the weapon a bit plain, but it's what the client described. December: AND NOW IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!! I had been working on this piece since August, going back to it every now and then and getting frustrated. I'm really glad I came back to it and finally finished it, since I love this pair and I put a lot of effort into it back in August. However, I'm also really glad I completely overhauled a lot of it, specifically the flowers. Though I'm not 100% happy with the mums in this one, they look a thousand times better than the mums I had originally sketched back in August, and were part of the reason I had such a hard time finishing this for months. I also thought it would be nice to end the year on the same note it started; with a flower couple. I've definitely learned a lot since January, and I hope to continue growing in 2019! 2019 GOALS!

Work on backgrounds for the love of god

Draw more stuff that isn't RWBY

Perspective

Make more speed paints and post more to youtube in general

#2018 summary of art #2018 retrospective #art progress #year in review #not art

14 notes · View notes

zoesrose · 3 years ago

Text

TEXTS; ZOE & YAS

pt.2 - January 2021 - March 2021

JANUARY 2021

yasmin puckerman

How your sub legs doing?

zoe rose

It's fine.

yasmin puckerman

If I was you I'd be like iT's fINe wHAT??

but i'm not doing you like that, don't worry

zoe rose

that was funny

but i'm not calling you Miss

but i suppose this week, you are free to call me Zoe

or any other nicknames you're been wanting to use

yasmin puckerman

oh shit

I'm gonna have to think on that.

zoe rose

no rush, I have a feeling this week is just going to drag

yasmin puckerman

It's not all that bad. Bet you could have fun with it.

zoe rose

i doubt it

yasmin puckerman

You already got a nickname from me

zoe rose

What's that?

yasmin puckerman

you got other people callin you Sir?

zoe rose

No, but I'm not sure if I would call that a nickname

yasmin puckerman

petname

zoe rose

A petname insinuates complete freedom, you have to use a title with me

yasmin puckerman

switch up got you splitting hairs

zoe rose

It does have me on edge

yasmin puckerman

you're still gonna be the same you on the other side maybe know a little more what it's like to be me is all and Marley

zoe rose

Thank you.

Sir.

yasmin puckerman

good girl tight Goodnight Zoe.

zoe rose

What's bothering you?

yasmin puckerman

Just got that feeling. You know when you gotta get control, let off steam some of the healthy ways

zoe rose

I understand that feeling all too well.

If you find that you need to (leaf) (smoke) just let me know and I'll come to you.

yasmin puckerman

always take that offer

zoe rose

I'll be right over then

yasmin puckerman

dope

zoe rose

Are you busy tonight?

yasmin puckerman

Free as a bird.

zoe rose

Would you like to accompany me to the club? I need to let loose.

yasmin puckerman

Hell yeah. Let's do that.

yasmin puckerman

so the smight flub babes... creepy fetish murders or regular type masochists what you think?

zoe rose

I think it's the latter.

yasmin puckerman

Me too. They had a chill vibe. I’m guaranteed to like anyone that complements my right hook tho so I trust your judgement more, Sir.

zoe rose

You do have a nice right hook. It's too bad you didn't get to see mine.

yasmin puckerman

I jumped too soon. I know, I know Froggy and I am not sorry

But if we hit up their spot, that should facilitate that.

zoe rose

I'm going to add a

next to your name in my phone

Is it something you want to check out?

yasmin puckerman

thanks I hate it Yeah I think it is. What’s the worst that could happen right? If its shit we’ll leave.

zoe rose

I won't, don't worry.

If we're going to do this, I want to establish some rules first.

yasmin puckerman

You said rules and my stupid ass got horny tf But I agree. I think. What type of rules?

zoe rose

Rules for your safety.

1. You will stay in my sight at all times. 2. When I say stop, that means stop. 3. When/if I say it's time to go, there will be no questions asked. 4. When/if you say it's time to go, I will escort you out, no questions asked.

yasmin puckerman

Yeah I’m down. What about if you lose your shit, could we drop rank? Hold up do you ever lose your shit? I can’t see it now that I think about it.

zoe rose

I never lose my shit. I've been described as apathetic on more than one occasion.

yasmin puckerman

I could see it. Aight bet. Got you, Sir. Looks I got plans next Sat night

zoe rose

I'd like to make it a habit to dress you whenever we're together. If that's alright with you.

yasmin puckerman

Whenever we going out somewhere or whenever whenever I’m with you?

zoe rose

The latter is tempting, but we'll stick to the first one for now

yasmin puckerman

I’m cool with that. Had me looking good on that yacht

zoe rose

You did look good.

yasmin puckerman

Speaking of parties and next Friday, the Sylvesters are having a birthday thing. Open bar. You wanna be my escort?

zoe rose

Yes.

yasmin puckerman

dope.

zoe rose

Apparently someone put my phone number up in the girls bathroom somewhere on campus.

yasmin puckerman

You be hitting to good. They tryin to share tips

zoe rose

It’s irritating.

yasmin puckerman

You getting a lot of takers?

zoe rose

Just one was too many, so yes.

yasmin puckerman

did you at least have then send pics? Seems like a waste.

zoe rose

You and I both know that's not how I operate.

yasmin puckerman

True. You busy rn? I’m on my way to my brother but tryin to

quick.

zoe rose

No.

yasmin puckerman

cool. can I meet you somewhere?

zoe rose

I'm behind the cafeteria.

yasmin puckerman

omw

zoe rose

(thumbs up)

zoe rose

How's your hand?

yasmin puckerman

purple

zoe rose

It's been a few days, you should have someone look at it.

yasmin puckerman

Yeah that's probably true. Oh shit you know what, I was recently told there's wholeass free medical services on this campus.

zoe rose

I want to know the outcome when you do see someone.

It's amazing what opportunities are afforded to the rich, hm?

yasmin puckerman

Got you. Just set something up for tomorrow morning. At least little ol' me caught up in the benefits. I wonder if I can find a hook up for chiropractor visits

zoe rose

Good girl.

This certainly seems like the type of place that would have something like that. I'm sure if you get a referral from the school any place in town will take it

yasmin puckerman

damn that was new in text form. read the notif off my home screen.

zoe rose

Good or bad?

yasmin puckerman

good. better in person but that's usually cause you're literally fucking me when you say it. it's my performance skills. crushing it.

zoe rose

What are your thoughts on trying something a little more domestic?

yasmin puckerman

Like what?

zoe rose

Household chores, kneeling, things like that.

yasmin puckerman

you know, chores are actually hella unimportant to submission

zoe rose

It's not about the chores.

yasmin puckerman

We could try it out.

zoe rose

That's all I'm asking for.

yasmin puckerman

Aight, you got it.

zoe rose

Thank you.

yasmin puckerman

So I was talking to your sister idk to be encouraging about the switch thing and practicing

Now she's cooking Monday night and I think I'm washing her dishes I know I don't gotta tell you that but

zoe rose

Thank you for telling me.

FEBRUARY

yasmin puckerman

You and me tomorrow right?

zoe rose

Yes.

yasmin puckerman

dope. I’m gonna wrap my hands this time.

zoe rose

We can wrap each other's hands.

yasmin puckerman

how romantic

zoe rose

is that what the kids are considering romantic these days?

yasmin puckerman

the kids?

lol okay grandma

zoe rose

I thought it was funny

yasmin puckerman

trust me it was

hold up, before i get called out trust me it was, Sir.

zoe rose

i'm glad i was able to make you laugh

yasmin puckerman

you know it don't take much you gonna be dressing me?

zoe rose

Yes.

And we're going to apply Vaseline on our faces, necks, and wrists.

yasmin puckerman

the ol vaseline trick, getting serious

zoe rose

It's better to be prepared.

yasmin puckerman

I can’t wait. I like seeing you like that. Badass and focused.

zoe rose

I think I might actually step into the ring tonight.

yasmin puckerman

Really?

zoe rose

I can’t let you have all the fun.

yasmin puckerman

Now I def can't wait.

zoe rose

Why’s that?

yasmin puckerman

I finally get to see if the bark matches the bite.

zoe rose

I see. I suppose you'll see tonight.

yasmin puckerman

How’s your eye?

zoe rose

Fine. The swelling is down and it’s fading.

yasmin puckerman

That’s good. Must have been my magic touch and them peas.

zoe rose

Your magic touch, huh?

yasmin puckerman

hell yeah I am the baddest chick Shorty you don't believe me, then come with me tonight and I'll show you maaagic what what

zoe rose

♫ i got the magic stick ♪♬

yasmin puckerman

You getting in the ring again this weekend?

zoe rose

Yes. Are you?

yasmin puckerman

I might just watch you go a few rounds because a, that shit was sexy af and b, hands been fucking twinging so I should probably actually give it a minute. Tired of rubbing it out in the morning with my left hand

zoe rose

Come over in the morning. Give your left hand a rest.

yasmin puckerman

don't gotta tell me twice

zoe rose

You're missing something.

yasmin puckerman

my fault Yes, Sir

zoe rose

Good girl.

A blunt and some pussy, I can't imagine a better way to wake up.

yasmin puckerman

already know tomorrow bout to be a good day.

(smile blush) (alien)

zoe rose

liked this message

yasmin puckerman

I'm not trying to come rat a g

yo your sister just asked me to fu

it's nbd but your

you hear that one girl yesterday saying how next week is the last fight club?

zoe rose

Yes. Did you ever find out why?

yasmin puckerman

sounded like whoever funds the space is done vacationing here. do you be forgetting we are legit on a whole ass island surrounded by people with bucks. people do drop a lot in the shop but I swear I forget sometimes

zoe rose

That makes sense. Trust me, I'm constantly reminded of it.

yasmin puckerman

guess I just don't pay enough attention

zoe rose

I think it's just always something that's stood out to me. Other people being able to afford what I couldn't.

yasmin puckerman

Now we're slumming it on someone's yacht every other weekend I'm gonna miss the saturday set up tho

zoe rose

What do you think you're going to miss the most?

yasmin puckerman

besides watching you kick ass? it just feels good. Letting shit out. adrenaline I guess.

zoe rose

Yes, it was the same for me.

What if we started something like that here on campus?

yasmin puckerman

like do our own? for real?

zoe rose

Yes, why not?

yasmin puckerman

hell yeah house makes bank on books

zoe rose

The real question is: how do we invite people and still keep it a secret?

yasmin puckerman

if i'm gonna be brainstorming, i gotta be high for that

zoe rose

I think you're about to ask me something, so I'll just wait for it.

yasmin puckerman

if I just knock, does that count as asking?

zoe rose

No.

yasmin puckerman

you tryin to smoke? Sir?

zoe rose

Try again.

yasmin puckerman

do you want to smoke with me, Sir?

zoe rose

That's better, thank you. The door's open.

yasmin puckerman

You have time to chill tomorrow, Sir?

zoe rose

I was actually going to ask you the same thing.

yasmin puckerman

Oh so you was thinking about me

zoe rose

You say that like it's not something I would readily admit.

yasmin puckerman

Not gonna say I don't like hearing it confirmed.

zoe rose

I don’t mind confirming it from time to time.

yasmin puckerman

Loving the family time but, i'm trying to get away for a little bit if you know what I mean

zoe rose

I've just been in my room. Come over.

yasmin puckerman

Yessir. Already grabbed 2 cans of orange.

zoe rose

liked this message

yasmin puckerman

at least this was a good week to go smight flub-less. we still chillin tho?

zoe rose

My sister is coming over tonight, but you're free to join us.

yasmin puckerman

oh damn, I can't I need your sister thinking I'm too busy r that cool I don't wanna get all in on your time together.

zoe rose

Alright. Are you free tomorrow?

yasmin puckerman

as a bird in spring

zoe rose

I'm going to assume that means yes. I'm thinking a beach day, how do you feel about that?

yasmin puckerman

sounds dope. for a person at a school surrounded by beaches I never really hit it up. Never been a beach person

zoe rose

We'll change that tomorrow then.

yasmin puckerman

cool as long as we involve food

zoe rose

I'll have Marley make us something before she leaves in the morning.

yasmin puckerman

want me to bring sum from the toy collection, Sir?

zoe rose

Yes. It's not like me but, surprise me.

yasmin puckerman

yeah, it's hello not but, bet I got us

zoe rose

See you then.

yasmin puckerman

(peace) (alien)

MARCH

zoe rose

Do you have plans on Saturday?

yasmin puckerman

nah, I save em for yo

Nope.

zoe rose

How about Friday night and Sunday?

yasmin puckerman

you making me sound lonely af rn No, none plans. I've just been working tryin to catch up a little after taking days off with my mom here. But I have Sat off and I never work Sun

zoe rose

I want to have your whole weekend.

Please.

yasmin puckerman

in a you wanna tie me up kind of way or a that date you wanted type thi?

zoe rose

In an I would like your company for a full weekend type of way. Scenes and... just hanging out.

yasmin puckerman

Ok dope, I'm in I get off work at 7 on Friday.

zoe rose

Excellent. Consider these orders. From 7pm Friday to 7am Monday morning.

yasmin puckerman

you got it, Sir.

zoe rose

loved this

yasmin puckerman

finished that flyer. Imma make copies at work today

zoe rose

I can't wait to see what you come up with.

yasmin puckerman

maybe I can get some thrown up tonight on the low after you get a look at it

zoe rose

I'll come with you.

yasmin puckerman

dope

zoe rose

These new deans are something else, hm?

yasmin puckerman

I legit had to look bc someone asked me about new rules I’m

zoe rose

I'd rather not tempt fate. Let's find a venue off campus.

yasmin puckerman

whatever you say boss

zoe rose

I'll ask my connect what he knows.

yasmin puckerman

it was only a matter of time before this school tried somethin to put it’s program students in their place. Not here for it. But also can’t catch me giving a shit about a legacy status They can go on, I’m chillin

zoe rose

I've been expecting this as well. Doesn't even phase me when they pull the status card.

yasmin puckerman

the less I think about it the less likely I am to get pissed so, best for everyone

zoe rose

I should be back with Marley soon. Would you like something to eat?

yasmin puckerman

imma be honest, the answer is yes but also I raided your snack stash already Those sweet chili Doritos are

zoe rose

Those weren't mine.

yasmin puckerman

oh shit, then I owe ya roomie a bag of chips

zoe rose

I'm bringing tacos from that place you like.

yasmin puckerman

yesss How did you know I was craving tacos? Damn that just gave me a boner

zoe rose

I had a hunch, I suppose.

zoe rose

How are you feeling today?

yasmin puckerman

Good. I’m tight. No welts or anything.

zoe rose

And your headspace?

yasmin puckerman

Fine. I’m fucking fabulous today. And yesterday. I was fine on Saturday.

zoe rose

Okay, good.

yasmin puckerman

Yeah solid

zoe rose

Are you still up?

yasmin puckerman

Yeah

zoe rose

Come over?

yasmin puckerman

I would but I did a scene and I can’t leave.

zoe rose

Alright.

yasmin puckerman

Look, I was feeling some type of way and I needed to switch it up so You good?

zoe rose

Yes, why wouldn't I be?

yasmin puckerman

Idk It’s a perfectly valid question. You asked, I can. I mean, you didn’t right now but you did

zoe rose

I asked because it's my job as the Dominant to check in on your after an intense scene.

yasmin puckerman

fuck off and Dominants don’t? Damn, wait that came out fast I’m having a whole day. I meanT. Dominant’s need aftercare too

zoe rose

My aftercare was having you spend the night with me and keeping you close.

yasmin puckerman

Ok good wtf are you making me explain me asking how you are? I feel like I’m tripping

zoe rose

You just asked like something else was wrong with me. I misunderstood.

yasmin puckerman

oh my bad I don’t know why I’m so fucking touchy right now I switched my birth control so maybe I’m hormonal

zoe rose

I would like to see you when you're next free.

yasmin puckerman

Tomorrow?

zoe rose

Tomorrow night you're staying with me. These are orders.

yasmin puckerman

good call official orders for the new rules Yessir

zoe rose

liked this

yasmin puckerman

You coming by right? I picked up on my way home from work.

you wanna taste it?

zoe rose

Say less. Yes, I'm coming over. Damn you look good.

yasmin puckerman

It's GG4 and

And I'm wet so, please hurry?

zoe rose

Please hurry, what?

yasmin puckerman

please come get your tongue on me, Sir? I had a DAY. Got you a blunt rolled already and my legs open

zoe rose

That's better. I'll be right over.

yasmin puckerman

are you busy?

zoe rose

No.

yasmin puckerman

I need your help with something

zoe rose

Try that again.

yasmin puckerman

fuck yo for real not right n

I need your help with something please

no, damn. do I really have to do this when its an emerg

Can you help me with something, Sir?

Look I gotta slip out right now or I'm gonna be locked out. I tried to do it myself but I can't fucking get it and I'm gonna lose my shit if I have to deal with this all night. And there's only so many ppl I trust if it can't

zoe rose

Come over.

yasmin puckerman

thank god ok I'm running.

yasmin puckerman

h ey

zoe rose

Having a good night?

yasmin puckerman

I did but I could be having a bett er 1

zoe rose

And how's that?

yasmin puckerman

yeah caus imma need your assistannce i'm gonna fall in the tub

zoe rose

What are you doing?

yasmin puckerman

mmmmmm busy being busy I was think in abt you

zoe rose

Are you touching yourself, Yasmin?

yasmin puckerman

oooooh full namin me you're so cute

zoe rose

That doesn't answer my question.

yasmin puckerman

don't you wanna sho w me how no cute you are or sum?'

zoe rose

Seems like you're still missing something.

yasmin puckerman

porn.gif

can you com over so I can ride you, please sir?

zoe rose

I'll be right over.

yasmin puckerman

goodgirr (blushsmile x2)

#yasmin #texts: yasmin #texts: part two #( kiss it better )

0 notes

wcoastboy · 4 years ago

Text

emptiness, lockdown and a broken heart

so I am one of these kids who idealize love (a lot), I mean I am a cancer for god’s sake and most of my chart is water sings - overwhelmingly similar to lana del rey’s I might add, perhaps that’s why I am very affected by anythings she produces? - and I feel a lot. I always think of some aspects, (physical, cultural, emotional) and some traits that I’d love for a future husband to have. I am very traditional in that sense - I suppose oddly so for someone in the lgbtq community - but as troye sivan’s music says, I really do see a “little house on the hill and children's names,” and I feel like even though lust is my one main cardinal sin (for life, for beauty, for wealth, for happiness, for beautiful young guys, for wine, for good food, and everything pretty, shiny and decadent), I am so very relationship oriented.

since my first boyfriend, which was 6 years ago, I never really felt strong romantic feelings towards anyone, in mid 2019 and even more so in 2020 during lockdown I started thinking that I had gone numb, I only lusted for pleasure, and yes I did want to connect with someone but it became very hard, especially because I had set some standards to a good and happy relationship which I suppose are not easily met. since that time in 2019 I would be complaning to my friends that I wanted a boyfriend and how annoyed I was by not finding anyone, was I reaching for the stars? in september 2020 I came back to beirut, for the summer semester and for a moment I was so very happy, still longing for a company who could adore me and be devout to loving me, but I had managed to be accepted into a double major program (a little harder than just one), got my first real job with something I love doing (related to restoration and preservation of national heritage/art/architecture), and paid fairly ok, I also was getting to learn much more arabic and going around nostalgic ancient ruins, ashtonishly beautiful mediterranean beaches, medieval churches and getting high with my friends watching he city lights of beirut skyline dancing in my eyes.

everythiNg seemed fIne, But I did keep complAining about not finding him. so my friend toLd me “stop looking, he’ll appear.” and though shallow advices bother me, I decided to wat. not a week after, on october 31st 2020, a halLOween night, I was with another friend on a call and a guy messages me on instragram, telling me my pictures were really pretty. one hour into the conVErsation he asked if he could see me, not to go anywhere or do anYthing, just see me. I then tOld him he was welcomed into my apartment, and half an hour later he was here, I opened the door to a gorgeoUs, blonde and blue eyes gemini, whose body was so pretty it made me a bit shy. (please keep in mind that where I live at the time, cases were very low, the country had dealt well with the pandemic until that point) and for 3 hours we talked, we discussed a myriad of personal philosophies (and btw, this is NOT how it works in the gay world), ranging from religion, academia, future plans, family, sexuality, and then yes, we kissed, and he had the most amazing kisses, so sweet-tasting, so tender, so passionate.

in that day, a day I was feeling so alone (no halloween parties in lockdown..), I was so fulfilled. I learned he is a successfull architect, family oriented, passionate lover, I wasnt, however, in love with him, I still thought of myself as someone looking for love, but eventually he managed to make me fall in love with him. he’d wake up earlier than me to send me good mornings and he’d go back to sleep, he’d write me poems, come at any point that I’d mentioned I missed him, bring me gifts, spoil me with love, car rides and favors, he poured his heart unto me. I was a bit scared tho, so I asked us to go slower, he didnt take it well at first but he agreed, we had this conversation three times, he would insist in buying gifts like gucci shoes or weekends in expesive skiing resorts - which I refused.

the day we had this conversation for the first time was a m a z i n g at the beginning, I went to a brunch with my architect boss and my work colleagues, collected my salary, went to the gym, came home, got some feedback on university papers (all very positive 90+ papers, which made me very happy as it showed me how capable I am in academia), and my date had invited me for dinner in a restaurant of my choice. I chose a small, traditional Italian restaurant up in the mountains from beirut (a lovely place), which he promtly made a reservation, and I went to get ready. at which point I called one of my best friends, and I just had this epiphany of feeling like a real adult in the first time in 20 years of my life. I truly did feel like I could conquer all? I was doing well at my job, even better at university, getting paid, professors enjoyed my company and invited me for talks, I was handling not one but two programs, I was in a good place with all my friends, I was in a steady pace gym-wise, I hard learned a lot about me and parts of my origin that semester too, I was falling in love with the middle east, and I had my man. a strong, well dressed, awfully good looking blondie who adored me and came to pick me up two hours later smelling so good with his cool sportscar. I felt very fulfilled, I was in awe that in 2020, a year that I had lost my grandfather and so many had perished was ending overwhelmingly well for me - until later that day.

after the restaurant - and the amazing food - we went around in the car, we made out and more, and eventually we had the third conversation, in which I still was not ready for full commitment (allow me to explain that me, a cancer, when engaging in a stable relationship will be very, very committed, and I couldnt jump in headstrong - as I had done before - within just a month), and simply like that, he dismissed me, left me, took me home and never saw me again. I talked to him the day after in which I told him it was unfair how he made me fall for him and he just leaves me at once. I became very numb, he did keep calling me and messaging me for a month after, asking how I felt and my plans for the winter holidays, asking me for a cooking hangout and whatnot. I was numb, I didnt fight for him or anything. I wish I had. because a month later I was in pain, heartbroken, struggling, hurting, and at that point he seemed to have healed from me, I tried patching things back but its not really working, and at this point, its preopably gonna stay like that.

the worst part is that I truly had become his friend? so I went through grieving in two different perspectives, the loss of a lover and the loss of a friend.

cut to february 2021, now the pandemic has worsened to some extent and I am under absolute lockdown, I am not emplyed as the work was short term, I can’t see my friends or go around exploring the scenery, there’s not gym and I lost a couple family memebers due to covid19 and cancer.

I used to deal pretty well with the lockdown, I am kept to myself, a few books and my mackbook go a long way, I can spend days in reclusion. I am also a pretty ok student and now....now nothing. I am hating this lockdown and it truly pains me to see that there are *weeks* left of it, I am not being able to focus as I usually do, I am not even very communicative these days (and I talk too much), its been very heard being heartbroken in a tiny apartment with me and me only, I’ve resorted to several activies so far but nothing seems really effective to be honest. I fear that he is really over me, and he is not even in the country as of now. everything seems so empty, I am not hurting as much as I was a few days ago, the weeks from january 17th to february 3rd were hell for me, now I suppose I can find some joy but the only thing i’d love to right now is lying my head in his chest.

the one good thing that came from all of this was the fact that because I was so sad, when I got the news that my uncle had died I got so, so sensitive that I ended up falling apart on the phone with my aunt and my sister, whose reaction to my story with him were unecpectedly sweet, both of them now are pretty open and understanding of my sexuality and I was very, very relived to open up to memebers of my family, my kin, my blood. (up until that point I had opened up only to friends).

and I suppose that now I know that I hadnt gone cold from love, it was just that I hadnt find the one. hopefully I’ll heal faster than my first break up, but it does pain me a lot, because you know these standards I had mentioned earlier? he fit very well in the majority of them.

#love #heartbreak #2021 #pandemic #upload #journal entry #lockdown #nostalgia

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horoscopesbygil · 8 years ago

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Horoscopes by Gil Hizon - Week of April 30 - May 6, 2017

You better learn how to tuck, because this week’s emotional rollercoaster is gonna be speeedy, queen!

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

Underneath that peppy facade lurks a deep-seated emotional trauma that has moved centerstage in your heart of hearts during this crucial time in your life. The pain is so great that talking about it with other bitches might cause your psyche more harm. We respect this decision of yours, and more power to you, gurl, but know that at some point, that shit’s gotta come out. =====

GEMINI (May 21 – June 21)

When bitches accuse you of being scatterbrained this week, it’s not something that you can just brush off and claim that they just don’t understand ju. It will be because there is some T to what they’re saying. You are juggling a lot of personas this week -- more than your default of 2 -- and it may take some time to find a comfortable rhythm that can service all identities. It’s doable, tho! =====

CANCER (June 22 – July 22)

You are crabbier than usual this week, pun fucking intended, and if EVEN YOU can’t handle this emotional turmoil, then the rest of us are fucked. What you have to understand, dahling, is that this shit will take time. The most important thing you can do right now is to be patient with yourself and how you’re dealing with it all. Contrary to popular belief, you have more time than you think. =====

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

So, you have like this set plan for the week, right? That’s cute and all, but bitch, yous gonna need a contingency plan because not errbody’s gonna be hip to your itinerary, no matter how sickening it is. And here’s the thing, queen. The more you cling onto your schedule for dear life, the more miserable you’ll feel when it all goes to shit. If you can be more open like you are at 3am at some random trick’s doorstep after a night out on boystown, then the more you can handle the shitshow. =====

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

You’ve been stepping back a bit because major shifts are happening on the astral plane, but you’re doing this all wrong, gurl! The thing is, you’re not the only queen who’s refraining from the usual hustle, and if no one else is taking action, this means the pathways are open wide for you to take advantage of. Better untuck quick, and come up with a strategic plan of attack. =====

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

If there’s ever a time for you to stay in your lane, than this week is it, my darling. Comparing your progress to that of others will only make you paranoid, nitpicking what has gone wrong in your life and blaming others for your so-called misfortunes. And gurl, that shit is all a waste of your fucking time. The more you put your focus on being fierce, the faster your ascension will be. =====

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

Okay, gurl, so like, there’s just waaayyy too much input from social media about your recent escapades and postings about the shit that matters to you. And at some point, you’re gonna have to clear out all the din and really listen to your own opinions about your own opinions, you know what I’m saying? It won’t hurt to turn off all the noise so much so that you can hear the beating of your own heart. =====

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

The worst way for you to get anybody to sign up for your cause is to fucking guilt them into being on board. Bitches don’t wanna HAVE TO DO SOMETHING because of some sense of personal obligation. I always say, there are more people out there who believe in your cause -- they may not be close acquaintances of yours but they would subscribe to your agenda and they’re a lot easier to find and convince than you may think. Point blank, stop wasting time on your so-called friends who just don’t give a shit. =====

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

When your ex shows up at your doorstep, you’re gonna have to turn the ho away. Yeah, bitch, I know it sounds cruel, but if you so much as let an atomic particle of this queen in your house, then it’ll be that much easier for hurr to manipulate yo ass. Remember, you don’t have the best control of your emotions right now. But you still have the physical coordination to shut the door on hurr fucking face. =====

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

When something like really emotional happens, you tend to shy away from the situation and rely on the mental realms to help you get through the shitshow. Well, your usual defense mechanismz/machinations won’t work this time, bitch! Not all the brain olympics in the world can detract you from what’s really at stake here. This is a matter of the heart and not of your big ass mind. =====

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

See, like, when shit hits the fan, we can always rely on you to be sprawled on your thrift store couch, smoking a joint and being like, “it’s all good, man.” And that moment where we’re all wondering if you’re being inspirational or just plain lazy, is enough to distract us from the shitshow in front of us. That alone, is why you’re a crucial part of our clique. =====

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

The time for ambiguity is OVAH, queen! This is the week where you start drawing the muthafucking lines. There is no room for gray anymore. Things are so crucial right now that any dilly dally in beliefs is sure to set yo ass back. Nobody’s got time for that! The great thing about being so stalwart in your conviction is that it has the power to inspire others to do the same damn thing. Kudos, bitch! =====

(DISCLAIMER for all entries: This is all a shitshow!)

For more Horoscopes By Gil Hizon, click here, gurl!

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