wrenresources

[leonardcohenofficial]

lemon basil pesto tortellini salad my beloved <3

[dulceateez]

𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡!𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐳

𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘫𝘰𝘰𝘯𝘨 

it wasn’t anything extraordinary, nothing out of the ordinary from him. he’s a gentleman. always has been and always will be. he treats everyone with the same amount of respect and love, but this time was different. after a surprise practice fire drill, you rush along with your classmates into the bitter fall wind, hugging your arms close to your chest. your legs shivering and lips trembling. you mentally scold yourself for wearing such a thin outfit. but here comes your hero; with a big hoodie in his hand. you slip into the clothing and wallow in his cozy, floral, manly scent. you look up at him to thank him but his arm wraps around your shoulders and brought you closer to his body. your cheeks turned crimson and you melt into his warmth, forgetting about the harsh cold; “y/n-ah, how can you wear such an outfit when it’s so cold outside! you need to dress warmer now, keep my hoodie for when you walk home today.” 

𝘴𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘸𝘢 

you didn’t know him prior to this interaction; heard of him. yes, of course you’ve heard of him. everyone has a crush on this boy and you understand the appeal. still, you’ve never felt the butterflies in your stomach when he flashes a smile in the direction of you and your friends. at least not until that subtle touch you felt on the small of your back as he passed by. who knew the crowded hallway could feel so empty after experiencing the seonghwa effect. what made your heart race was when he turned to flash you a smirk so devilish that it sent you straight to heaven. did you just fall for the more unattainable guy in this school? yes. do you regret it? no. you felt your mind warp into one like his followers.’ perhaps you dressed yourself up more and paid extra attention to your actions after the encounter; something you’ll never admit to yourself or anyone else. you want to feel his effect once more and that’s exactly why you fell for him. 

𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘩𝘰 

he’s the sweet boy next door, an eager puppy that always awaits your arrival, stalking your movements with child-like admiration. he finds you absolutely beautiful, since the day he moved in, but you’re taking longer to come around. but tonight changes the way you view him. your day was stressful, tear inducing even, and you just want to lay in bed and snuggle your favorite stuffed animal. the puppy analyzes your movements from afar and springs into action when you stomp right into your room as opposed to going into the kitchen for a snack like always. you lay in a puddle of your own self-pity when you hear thuds against your windowpane, you pull back the curtains and look down to see the homey boy smiling up at you with a bag of your favorite chips in hand. he gives it a shake, as if he’s coaxing you, you open the window up for him to climb into and he wastes no time in engulfing you in a bear hug. you replace the golden retriever plushy with him. as the two of you lay, not saying a single word, your heart starts to beat fast against his stomach; “y/n? are you nervous? do i make you nervous! you make me so nervous but i love it.” 

𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘨 

how can someone not fall for such a sweet little human? his hair is fluffy like cotton candy, cheeks puffy like mochi, eyes shinning brighter than the hard chocolate coating on candies. while his voice is as deep as the ocean it seems, his kind words contrast his tone. you often dreamt about the feelings of his lips; are they soft like clouds or do they send you to them? there was never one moment that solidified your attraction to him. from the first time you saw him, you’ve only had eyes for him. however, when you saw him giggling softly with his group of loud friends. the stark contrast between their bold and loud behavior and his gentle nature makes your heart go crazy. you suddenly became jealous--wanting to be the reason behind his laughter and his smiles, wanting to be the reason why he’s so bright and cheery. perhaps one day you will be. 

𝘴𝘢𝘯 

dimples. his cute little dimples. a dimpled boy like him never goes unnoticed. that’s how you noticed him, his cute smile and even cuter dimples. he sat across from you in the library once, taking notes from his textbook and writing them down on notebook paper. you admired him from afar. he was doing the same thing, raking his eyes over your body and face. finally, you built up the courage to introduce yourself to him and your fixation on his grew into a crush just by the way his eyes looked up at you: charming and hopeful. he removed his backpack from the seat next to him and invited you to sit down with him, a welcoming smile the whole time. while the two you studied independently, he kept sliding silly drawings under your fingertips. that’s when you knew for certain that you fell for the dimpled boy. and you fell for him hard after he asked you, “wanna go out and get a coffee or something after?” 

𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘪 

who knew being burnt by your newly bought cup of coffee could end so sweetly? you’ve long forgotten about the burning sensation when you locked eyes with the empathetic set of eyes that stared back at you. annoyed? yes. but  how can someone stay mad at an innocent face like his? you’ve seen him around the campus, always thought he was attractive, but a handsome face doesn’t leave and impression on you. however, him stripping out of his hoodie to give to you, leaving him in a very thin white t-shirt, made your heart swoon. he panicked upon seeing your skin turn into red. not knowing what else to do, he gently took your wrist and guided you into the nurses office where he stood by you every step of the way. even offered to take you to the hospital; but you two settled on him buying you a new cup of coffee...of course he joins you as well. 

𝘸𝘰𝘰𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨 

the cockiness he has drives you crazy in the worst way possible. you hate his smirks and hate his abrupt laughter. what you don’t hate is how friendly and social he is--you’re envious of those traits. he treats everyone like he’s their buddy and makes sure everyone is included somehow. you’re more on the shy side and an easy target for bullies to pick on, that’s why you didn’t believe him when he spoke so kindly to you. but the moment that made you realize that your heart has fallen for him? when he scared off the bullies. you’ve never seen this side of him; snarling teeth, fist balled, veins on his neck prominent with anger. after seeing you on the brink of tears after having insults thrown your way, he can’t just sit around and enable this behavior by not saying anything. the friendly, but somewhat annoying, facade disappears. he shakes the guy by his collar, venom being spit on his face. once he scared the man out of his wits, he turns to you and approaches you softly, gently grabbing your hands; “has he been bothering you lately? i’ll make sure he never even looks in your direction.” 

𝘫𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰

such a sultry voice with high notes that reach the gods surrounding the earth, how can someone just move on from this type of singing? it was an immediate attraction to the anonymous man behind the honey voice. you began to wonder what he may look like--setting your expectations higher than the notes he is able to sing. you never built up the courage to peek into the music room and steal a glance and you always chickened out on staying after to see who leaves the room. it wasn’t until the day of the school’s choir when you found out who the voice belonged to. the quiet kid steps up to the mic and begins singing; your ears perked up instantly. the voice so familiar and you knew from exactly where. he stared at you as he sang the sweet lyrics, never breaking eye contact despite his solo ending. you felt alone in the audience, like everyone has disappeared and now it’s just him serenading you, warmth is all you felt. 

◌ 𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ◌ @blaqpinksthetic​ @tinkerbellwoo​

[sierraraeck]

Bad Liar

Moreid (Spencer x Derek)

Masterlist

Summary: Ever since his first day at Quantico, Spencer has had only one thought on his mind: SSA Derek Morgan. He knows that any sort of relationship would be inappropriate, but that doesn’t stop the constant stream of fantasies from flooding his mind.

Category: Spicy fluff, smut alluded

Warnings: Non-graphic descriptions of sex, fantasizing, suggestive touching, kissing, very light cussing.

Word Count: 3.5k

A/N: This was inspired by the song “Bad Liar” by Selena Gomez. If you wanna give that a quick listen, go for it, if not, that’s chill too. I know that I haven’t been very active and haven’t posted anything in a while, but sometimes life just happens. Hopefully this was worth the wait…

Spencer had heard the phrase “I never stop thinking about you.” He’d heard it in reference to love and relationships when people were apparently so madly in love they couldn’t stop thinking about the other. He never really bought that. Love was just a bunch of feel-good chemicals that couldn’t affect the amount of time spent thinking about another person. Plus, how could anyone ever constantly think about a person? There were so many other things to think about like surviving high school, getting into college, graduating, of course his mom, and then getting into the FBI, and how he would surely not be able to make it all the way through Quantico training. No one could ever think about one person all the time. No, definitely not.

But Spencer wasn’t known for being a good liar.

His first day at Quantico he saw Derek Morgan, and he realized that he was wrong. He was so utterly and outrageously wrong.

Because after he saw him, heard his voice just once, his exceptional mind kept those interactions on constant repeat.

He was lucky he was so good at multitasking otherwise he would have definitely failed by now.

Not like he still wouldn’t.

He couldn’t sleep, not with someone like Derek Morgan intruding his every thought, every midnight desire. On top of that, they were about to go into the hardest week of physical training yet, and Spencer knew that this was the one challenge that his brain could not overcome.

The one redeemable thing about the humiliating experience he was sure would come during the following days was that he’d get to see SSA Morgan again. Sure, it'd be more embarrassing to fail in front of him, but at least he’d get to see him a few more times before they kicked him out for being the scrawny kid he’s always been.

The feelings of excitement and anxiety twisted his gut into a wonderful knot, keeping him from yet another night of sleep. Somehow that made it both harder and easier for him to get up when the clock hit 4:45.

Spencer looked between two blinds covering the window on the right, allowing him to see that the sun was still about an hour from rising. Slipping on his given shirt and pants, he hoped that there would be some source of caffeine at breakfast, preferably coffee.

He trudged into the bathroom to find his roommate already awake and dressed. “Big day. You excited?” Jeff, a man about a head shorter than Spencer but at least twice his width in pure muscle mass, asked.

Spencer just grunted in response.

“What? You’re not excited to get pitted against someone else so that you can flail around in an attempt to spar?”

“I’ll stick to teaching you the technique,” he quipped.

Jeff laughed. “It’d suit you better. Unfortunately your wizard brain and forbidden library won’t help you in this one. But dammit if you aren’t the smartest guy here.” Jeff shook his head as if it were a shame.

Once they were ready, along with the rest of the NATs, the group was directed to jog across campus to the building they’d be training in. The day was off to a bad start.

Spencer did his best to distract himself from the actual running bit, trying to analyze the people in his group and those they passed as they went.

Bored, hungry, important, invisible… Derek?!

He turned his head to follow the tall man with short black hair and dark eyes as the group passed him on the sidewalk.

No, that wasn’t him. Of course it wasn’t. Agent Morgan is waiting for us at the facility.

Spencer tried to hide the slight disappointment that came over him. He felt so stupid for looking for him everywhere, but he couldn’t help it. Even his own knowledge and logic was failing him when it came to this man he knew next to nothing about expect for his shining smile and intense eyes and toned biceps and amazing abs and powerful legs and delicious stamina and strong hands that could grip his neck and hold him down and his defined hips bones that Spencer knew would dig into his thighs and certainly leave bruises if he were to…

What was his issue? He couldn’t be thinking that way about one of his trainors.

Although it helped the jog pass by faster. Time flies when you’re having fun, right? Or at least imagining having fun.

When they arrived at the other facility, they were provided a quick breakfast, unfortunately no coffee today, and then led to the top floor with an entire wall traded out for floor to ceiling windows.

The room they entered was massive, large mats rolled out edge to edge, and the smell was musty. It felt humid, sticky sort of, and Spencer hated to think about why that was.

He quickly scanned the room and found his target immediately. Across the way, Derek had his opponent mid flip, landing harshly on his back with a thud. He helped the poor guy up, laughing a bit as he did so. His pearly whites were on full display when he looked up and caught Spencer’s eye. Spencer quickly diverted his gaze, opting instead to look down at his twisting hands.

“Today we will be focusing on hand to hand combat,” Derek announced once the group had wandered closer. “You never know when the perpetrator will decide not to run and instead to attack you, or when you will find yourself without any weapons other than yourself to protect you. The first thing we are going to practice are some basic jabs. Grab a partner and follow our demonstration.”

Derek and the man he’d thrown on the ground earlier, Grant, demonstrated the seemingly simple movements that Spencer and the rest of the NATs were supposed to replicate. Of course, everyone else made it look easy, but Spencer just couldn’t wrap his head around what his arm was supposed to be doing where and when. It was frustrating, even more so than he’d prepared himself for.

“Keep your shoulders here,” that velvety deep voice said, accompanied by his large hands on either of Spencer’s shoulders, adjusting them to more of an angle.

All Spencer could do was swallow hard and nod. He didn’t even dare to look back at him.

“And spread your legs,” Derek said. His breath seemed to get closer to Spencer’s neck with every word, and quieter as he went along. But surely that was all in his head? Right?

Spencer’s startled eyes turned to look at the older man. The edges of his mouth twitched before resuming that stern, professional demeanour. “It’ll help you balance.” With that, he nudged Spencer’s foot farther backwards with his own and walked away, leaving Spencer feeling unnecessarily exposed and confused.

The guy across from him, Harold, one of the only people who had been genuinely nice to Spencer from the start, was watching the whole interaction with suspicion.

The day trudged on with not much change. Spencer’s skin was still on fire from where Agent Morgan had touched him, but he tried to convince himself it was because he didn’t really like being touched. He knew that was a lie, especially in this instance, but it didn’t stop him from telling it.

After lunch, training continued. But at least it got more interesting.

“Grant just got called out on a case, so I’ll be needing someone to help me with this demonstration.” Derek waited just about three whole seconds before smirking, the mischief written all over his face. “Come on? No one wants to volunteer? It’ll be fun, I promise.” When he was met with more silence (even the guys like Jeff didn’t want to be thrown around by Derek), he was forced to choose someone. “How about… Reid.”

Spencer’s head shot up from the back of the group. No, no, this is not good.

Spencer had been dreaming about getting thrown around by Derek for a few months now, but this was definitely not what he’d had in mind.

The crowd slowly parted and Spencer had to face the music; he was going to be humiliated in front of everyone, like nothing had changed since high school.

Sighing, Spencer forced himself to the front of the group. “Lay down for me, knees bent, would you?”

I’d do anything you asked, was Spencer’s initial response in his head. What he really did was shrug and follow instructions.

“The reason we practice this move is because at some point or another, you will find yourself in either position.” Spencer wasn’t quite sure what he meant by that until Derek legitimately stood over him, a leg on either side, then proceeded to get down on his knees, essentially sitting on top of Spencer.

He couldn’t even focus on what Derek was explaining anymore. Breathing didn’t exist. There was no way this glorious man was sitting on top of him right now. All he could think about was how prominent Derek’s ab muscles were through his tight shirt and how he wanted nothing more than to lean forward and run his tongue over them. Spencer could almost imagine what they would feel like; the rise and fall of his muscles, the small hairs covering his body… Spread your legs, he had said to him.

“So then Reid would grab my wrist…” Derek’s use of his name brought him back to reality. If only he could live in his fantasies for longer.

Spencer looked up at Agent Morgan confused. Derek’s eyes got wider and looked at his right hand and then down at his own left wrist. Spencer somehow got the message and reached his hand over to grab a hold of Derek’s wrist. “Good,” he declared. “After that, he would hook his left foot on the outside of my ankle.”

Spencer quickly followed orders, trying to force his brain to supply him with the information he’d missed.

“Then, he’d use my weight against me to flip me over.” Spencer’s eyes got big when Derek said that, mentally panicking that he could never be strong enough for that. Derek nodded at him, so Spencer tried to roll over, and to his, and everyone else’s, surprise, he actually could.

Within seconds Spencer was sitting on top of a very pleased Derek. “It’ll work every time. Of course, if your unsub is skilled he’ll lock you in and flip you back over and potentially pull your arm out of your socket,” Derek explained while doing just that to Spencer, minus the arm-out-of-socket thing, “But we’ll take this one step at a time.”

Derek was back on top of Spencer with his legs wrapped around him in a vice-like grip, but quickly let go to help him up. Spencer gladly accepted the help.

Spencer doesn’t exactly have what one would consider a “big dick.” He always thought that was something to be ashamed of but standing there, getting hard in the middle of an FBI training academy, he couldn’t’ve be more grateful.

The NATs were sent back to work on the newly demonstrated move with their partners. Just as Spencer was about to flip Harold over for the third time, he looked over his head and rolled his eyes.

“What?” Spencer asked.

“What is it with you two?” Harold asked in return.

“What?” Spencer repeated. Harold nodded in the direction he was just looking, and Spencer followed his gaze. Derek was walking by, but nothing else seemed of import. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh please,” Harold snorted. He was a lanky man like Spencer, but just a bit shorter and with glasses. Sometimes Spencer envied his glasses, as his contacts often got on his nerves. He continued, “The touching, the constant eye contact, the word choice that could be inherently sexual, and then literally sitting on top of you? When there were plenty of other men and women he could have picked for that demonstration? Tell me you don’t see it.”

Spencer mulled over these words for a few seconds before flipping Harold over. Looking down on him, he said, “I don’t think that means anything.”

“Then maybe you need to get a new prescription,” Harold said, pointing to his eyes.

Spencer shook his head. “What do my eyes have to do with this?”

Harold sighed. “God, your gaydar is so broken.” He flipped Spencer over, stood up, and walked away.

Shortly after, class was called and they were all let go for the remainder of the evening.

“Reid, can I speak to you for a moment?” Agent Morgan called out as the first of the NATs started to leave. A few caught Spencer’s eye with unanswered questions in them, but no more than the mound of questions Spencer had been asking himself.

Without answering, Spencer walked over to the corner of the room that Derek was standing in. He could tell that he was waiting for every single person to leave the room before speaking.

Spencer thought for sure he was getting kicked out because of how horribly he performed throughout the day.

To his surprise, that’s not at all what the outstandingly attractive man had to say. “I wanted to let you know that you did a good job today during the demo. Not many people handle that so well.”

Spencer waited for him to say more, but nothing more seemed to be coming. Derek actually seemed a bit nervous if Spencer could read him right. He replied cautiously, “Thanks.”

Derek cleared his voice and said, “Yeah. And if you ever want to stay late and work on some moves I’d be happy to help.”

Spencer just got more and more confused as his interactions with this god-like man increased. “Thanks,” he repeated. “Why are you offering to help me like that?”

Agent Morgan shrugged. “You’re one of the smartest people in FBI history to come through here, and definitely the youngest. There’s absolutely no reason you shouldn’t become an agent, and I want to see you succeed. That’s all.” He shrugged again, and if there was anything Spencer had learned from the profiling section of his training, someone being over-casual was usually a sign that they were stressed about something they viewed with extreme importance, and were trying to play it off. Why would he be stressed to talk to me?

“I guess I’ll take you up on that offer. Will you be here tomorrow?” Spencer asked, trying to mask the hope in his voice. Who was he kidding; Derek was already one of the top profilers in the Bureau.

“I will be. You can plan to stay after then.”

Spencer nodded and walked away, but not before glancing back one more time. Harold was right; they did make a lot of eye contact.

The next day couldn’t go by faster. Spencer had spent practically the entire night thinking about everything that had happened, trying to figure out if Harold was right or not. There was no way. Spencer was just Spencer, a NAT, and Derek Morgan was, well… Derek Morgan.

He probably just thought that Spencer was a hopeless case and needed extra help. Yeah, that was it. It had to be.

When the day was over, Spencer wasn’t just relieved like he usually was, but he was excited too. It no longer mattered to him what the reason was for him being there late, he just wanted to spend more time in the presence of SSA Morgan.

“I was thinking I’d help you with that second move we learned today, the cross-punch jab combo,” Derek announced. His voice echoed just a bit off the walls of the training center now that it was completely abandoned.

He walked over to one of the punching bags lined up just a few feet from the wall, and Spencer followed him in a manner that could only be described as a lost puppy. Spencer could keep track of all sorts of numbers, but the sheer amount of repeating memories morphing into new thoughts morphing into full blown fantasies was even too high for him to count. He’d never known of a drug so powerful.

“I’ll show you the move again, then I want you to try and copy it.” Derek stepped closer to the bag and executed a textbook one-two combo, the muscles in his arms and back contracting in perfect unison. God, Spencer wanted so badly to just reach out and run his hands all over this pristinely sculpted man, but he denied himself, letting his hands tremble in place instead.

Spencer stepped up to the bag next to Derek’s and attempted to do the same thing. Derek watched with a sharp eye.

After a few reps, the skilled agent took long strides that landed him only inches away from the younger man’s back. “Keep tension here.” His hands engulfed Spencer’s waist and twisted them to the side with the ease of swatting a fly.

The feeling was so overwhelming Spencer thought he might never be able to move again, and honestly, he didn’t want to. Standing there in the grip of that man was really all he’d been wanting for months now.

The only thing that pulled him out of his trance was the way Derek’s fingers lingered as he walked around to Spencer’s front, drifting down far enough to send a clear message, one that even Spencer couldn’t miss, but not far enough to be completely intrusive.

But Spencer wanted intrusive. He wanted nothing more than for Derek Morgan to invade his personal space to the point of no return.

He looked at the older man with shock and a burning question, but didn’t flinch or move back. Derek simply bit his lip and scanned Spencer up and down at what felt like a snail’s pace. He felt like a helpless deer being sized up by a lion for his next meal.

Spencer swallowed hard.

He’d been wanting nothing more than to be in this very same situation, or one of the multitudes of variations he’d created in his mind, but now that it was here could he really go through with it? Was it really the best idea? Did he really want this? No, he couldn’t.

But Spencer wasn’t known for being a good liar.

The only signal Derek needed was the simple nod of Spencer’s head.

And he got it.

Like a snake ready to strike, Derek brought his lips to Spencer’s in an instant. His questioning fingers had an answer, returning to their strong hold over Spencer’s hip bones.

Spencer knew what was happening was completely inappropriate, but couldn’t find the will to care. The man he’d been dreaming about, spending every waking and non-waking moment obsessing over, was actually interested in him too.

All his fantasies were flashing before his eyes, Derek’s muscles now completely exposed to him. He frantically pawed at him, trying to feel and memorize every millimeter of the beautiful body before him, like every inch was another drop of water in his achingly dry mouth.

“Hey, hey,” Derek whispered. “Patience. Not everything can happen at once, remember, one step at a time.”

Spencer took a moment to breathe and look into the warm eyes he’d been drowning in. Only for a moment, though, as he had a lot he wanted to do, starting with kissing his way down this man’s chest.

Derek laughed a little at Spencer’s impatience when he placed his hands on his broad shoulders and lips on his burning hot skin. He didn’t mind, though. Unexpectedly, the young man knew how to use his mouth. He couldn’t wait to explore that particular skill set some more.

Within the next few minutes, bodies were slammed into walls, forced to the ground, and pushed further down into the floor than was previously thought possible. The echo of the room only amplified the intoxicating sounds and the wall of windows overlooking the campus only increased the arousal.

Spencer would have a new appreciation for the musty smell and sweat induced humidity in the room from now on.

The tension for the remaining month before the NATs graduated was unbearable. Harold made sure to point out the nauseating amount of glances passed between the two men, but was respectful enough to not point it out to everyone. He tried to deny anything had happened, but Harold wasn’t having any of it and let Spencer know he was a lousy liar, something he definitely needed to work on.

Come graduation day when all NATs would be receiving their department assignments, Derek made sure to personally hand Spencer his.

He carefully opened the envelope and pulled out the sheet of paper with one bolded line reading: “Behavioral Analysis Unit.”

Spencer immediately looked up and locked eyes with Derek. He simply smirked in return.

Maybe his fantasy of having something more with the agent would become a reality after all.

-

Taglist

@90spumkin

[fishmongeringstudies]

the year i turned twenty i stopped waiting for someone to save my life and started eating more vegetables

in the winter of 2018 i got a root canal done on the molar in the upper left-hand corner of my mouth. it had been on the verge of death for a while now; two years prior to that a visiting government-sponsored school dentist had taken a look at it, frowned, and then spent the next two hours wheedling all the rot out of that tiny black hole with a drill. unfortunately the solution he imposed was both extremely painful and temporary, and so two years after the initial incident i found myself once again at the dentist's (this time at a clinic; school dentists don't like to deal with the extra-gritty stuff and are not paid enough to do so). they stuck a needle in my gum, numbed three-quarters of my mouth, then drilled a hole through the center of my tooth and ripped the withering shred of nerve-tissue right out of it.

my dentist helpfully explained all of the above to me during our consultation session in the same office in which he would rip the top half of my tooth off a week later. he was a balding, smiling man whose speech did not, unlike many medical professionals i had met over the years, have an edge of condescension to it. i liked him. i would have liked him more were he not planning to essentially castrated my tooth.

several weeks later i went to another dentist who specialized in helping people in post-root canal limbo, and she stuck a shiny metal crown on what was left of my molar. we then scheduled a series of check-ups to ensure that the crown had not flown off its liege while i attacked an ice cube or something similarly bad for my teeth and mental health, which stretched on for so long that she became, more or less, my primary dental care physician. at first the check-ups were a month apart. then two. time passed. her hair grew longer and our conversations less awkward; she was beautiful and snarky and looked like she would shoot god without hesitation if he stepped into range of her gun. she wore her hair short, red tinged with gold, in a pixie-cut that fell over half of one eye. for a while i thought i was in love with her.

'do you floss?' she asked me on my second check-up.

'no,' i said.

'well.' she broke off a length of dental floss and began to wind it around her fingers. it looked like a death threat and she looked ready to kill, though her eyes were smiling. 'you should.'

for the first year after having an utterly destroyed tooth brought back from the brink of death via a grisly temporary solution that would, at best, buy me one or two decades of peace, i didn't. i didn't floss because when she did it for me in her tiny examination room my gums bled so much it took hours for me to wash the bitter taste of iron out of my mouth. blood is a nice concept and a nicer motif in writing. but it smells awful, and it's worst on the tongue. so i didn't floss my teeth, and i went through life with the kind of casual detached disinterest with which i had approached most things up until then. at my next check-up she asked once again if i had been flossing and i lied that i had. after poking and prodding around in my mouth for a few minutes and taking a scan for good measure she gave me a look and said dryly, 'you haven't been flossing at all, have you.'

disappointing your parents, your favorite high school english teacher, or even your best friend is nothing compared to the sheer embarrassment that comes from knowing your beautiful dentist asked you to do the bare minimum, and you failed to deliver. her voice was arid but we had known each other for long enough by then for me to detect a thin undercurrent of disappointment. i had done it. i had lost the support of the only person in my life who could be counted on to support me. because i paid her for her services. and she was also very funny in a quiet sarcastic way. and she was beautiful.

having had my ego wounded beyond description i resolved to floss from then on and succeeded in dragging my poor aching gums past the bleeding stage to a point where they were merely post-workout sore. then i lost interest and forgot about the white, sterile-smelling clinic that was a fifteen minutes' drive from my house and the little pack of dental floss on the bathroom counter faded into obscurity. two weeks before my next appointment in 2020, an alarm on my phone went off to inform me of the approaching day of judgment. i panicked.

'have you been flossing?' my dentist asked as i lay back in the faded green chair and she put on a pair of new gloves.

'yeah,' i said.

five minutes later, she removed her army of dentistry equipment from my mouth with a satisfied hum. 'i see that you have.' her eyes were smiling. 'your teeth look fine. i'll just clean them a little for you.'

i celebrated impressing my favorite dentistry professional in singapore by forgetting to floss for the next two months. soon after that i got on a plane to america, and then two more for good measure in case i hadn't grown sick of sitting and burning in my own skin already, and then twelve weeks of insanity ensued, the details of which we are surely all acquainted with by now. late nights, walks in the forest, afternoons spent in the sun. mismatched footsteps and strange acquaintances. an elaborate circus act staffed entirely by misguided but well-meaning teenagers. a ring of fire.

two weeks ago i bought a box of dental floss for ninety-nine cents. i think this might be what the anthropologists call 'adulthood'. i was at target with a friend and we were getting toothpaste, which we had both nearly run out of, when i saw the little flat box of dental floss hanging from a hook on the wall. my teeth weren't particularly disgusting (they haven't been, not since i learned how to brush them properly), but they weren't beautiful. it had been a while since i had been on my own mind. for the last three months, others' pain had been my main priority, and now that we had eliminated most of them from the picture, i found myself with more time in the mornings to stare at myself in the mirror and wonder how, exactly, i was doing.

how are you doing? i asked. and the answer was i felt like shit.

while i've stayed in dormitories before for extended periods of time i always got out of doing laundry by either submitting my dirty clothes to an on-campus service which disappeared them into a hole in the fabric of reality and returned them to you a day later, cleaned and folded outside your room so the first time i did laundry by myself in america, a week after arriving on campus, i felt invincible. buying an iced chai from the cafe on a thursday morning and then settling down to work on my laptop until my first class started at noon, i felt like a character in a career advisory ad, like someone who knew where they were going and how they were going to get there. standing in front of the bathroom mirror of my summer dorm, winding a strand of dental floss around my fingers, i felt like i had aged fifteen years in the span of just one, and that just this once, it was for the better.

according to my adult friends, no one ever fully feels or recognizes that they are an adult. adulthood is an ideal that all grown children strive towards the way body-builders aim for more and more muscle mass until there's nothing left of them but a pair of well-toned biceps. there are several industry-approved ways to be an adult, but there are no suggested ways to feel like one. this is part of the gaping maw of inadequacy our generation has fallen into. this afternoon i melted butter in a pan and beat two eggs, milk, salt, and garlic powder together in a bowl. pouring the egg mixture into the pan i began to scrape the edges frantically towards the center with a spatula. the whole process took no longer than two or three minutes. by the end of it my hand was shaking.

according to my adult friends you just wake up one day and start looking for ways to re-organize your pantry and that's when you realize: i'm getting old, aren't i? and i'm getting old, aren't i? twenty's just the start of what a friend recently told me her parents refer to as 'the decade of pain'. but the beginning of something is included in the timeline of its accomplishments, too, and it takes more blind faith to start something than we give ourselves credit for. i have never used a saucepan up until today. in my younger years i often boiled broccoli or cauliflower in a small pot over an electric stove. but the butter, the eggs, the smell of fat sizzling on a pan- this is new to me. this entire life is new to me.

leaving the familiar warmth of your family home, it suddenly occurs to you how fragile life is. how everything your mother has done for you until now has kept you on the path forward, and now you have been given the keys to the basement you have to remember to buy laundry detergent before you run out. it all comes together like this: the humming laundry machines, the hand towels, the fridge full of fruit and cheese. it keeps you alive.

and it's awful. our generation doesn't know what self-care is because we're too busy trying to care for a world which tries, time and again, to kick us off the carousel of life and move on without its ephemeral teenage charges. we are bad at this 'living' thing because we often forget that we are alive at all. look out the window and the world's burning. look into the kitchen, and- quiet. this past year has done nothing to improve the paintings on the wall. we've all known hopelessness. we've all known what it's like to wake up and feel nothing at all.

and yet my flatmate has a new york times cooking subscription that she says we're welcome to borrow if we want to look up a recipe for something like paella, brownies, whatever. the other day she made shrimp scampi and when she knocked on my door and said 'i made food, if you'd like some' i remember thinking living with other people was worth it if you could sit around a table and twirl pasta noodles around your fork in silence. tomorrow i think i'll go to target again and see if i can find more acai. i miss it. i miss singapore's overpriced acai places and their stupid too-high chairs.

and i am living life clumsily, but who cares? a life is a life; all you have to do is live it. the rest can come later, after the dust has settled on the windowsill.

06.09.21

[polymetis-23]

Diary Entry Sept. 26th, 2021

Day 1 - The hunt begins

I spent most of today working on updates to my hero gear based off the trial runs these past few weeks. First I removed the giant skirt from my costume and replaced it with a utility belt. Sure those might not have been the most iconic thing about steampunk but they tinkered a lot so I'm sure they were around plenty. I hope to make more gadgets as time goes on so this will be a good place to store them. For now it is a simple belt with pockets as found at hardware stores. I know, it's ugly and doesn't really fit and I wish I had time to be proper about it, but with The Eye out there it seems somethings will sadly have to be function over form. 

In addition to adding the tool belt, I have been working on the wrist crossbows (told you I wouldn't forget about them). I've moved them down from the back of my hand to around my wrist and made the bow limbs out of a semi-bendable metal. They work like springs and shoot the dart out fairly fast … or at least that is the current theory, I've really only added the wrist strap, had to finish some homework.

As the sun started to set, it was finally time for me to find The Eye (seriously does anyone have a better name for this person?) I could've sworn I was in a movie. The sky was overcast but no rain and everything seemed eerily quiet. Without a better idea I started from where I last saw them, the eye was still on the wall and it didn't look like anyone had been home in a while, I hope she didn't kill him. Anyway, I wasn't about to break into someone's house because that is illegal so I sat on the roof and surveyed for any mysterious red lights. It may not have been the most efficient way to find them, but hey that red glow is the only thing I have to identify them at the moment, and well the eye. I saw a few flashes over the course of the night, and a few more eyes around the city. Some the crime was obvious, another breakin or general vandalism, but others a dark red eye was just on a wall, nothing around to denote why.

Day 2 - Uh yeah, exams are a thing

    How, might I ask, are we in the third week of classes and I already have a quiz. Like seriously what are we supposed to have learned at this point? Even if they had taught us something, this is the absolute worst time, now I have to spend all day studying and I can't go out tonight. I was getting so close last night to actually catching up to The Eye. Sure I hadn't actually seen them, but I was getting quicker at navigating the city so the time between red flashes and my arrival at a scene was getting less and less, it was only a matter of time until I caught them.

Day 3 - Crossbow work

    The forecast for today is rain, lots of rain all day and I don't really fancy going out and getting soaked or slipping and falling on my butt while hunting for Eye, so I guess today is a design day. It actually works out really well because now I will have the wrist bow ready for when I finally do encounter her. Next thing I need to work on is tranquilizer darts, I don't want to permanently hurt those I bring in, after all I'm not the judge, jury and executioner, I just bring people in to meet justice. 

    After today's tests the bow seems to be great … or at least manageable. I still need to improve the aiming, for some reason the bolts won't group together. And I need to make an automatic reloader attachment, I have plenty of darts held on the cuff, but it would be nice for the system to be semi automatic incase I miss a shot or more probably I am fighting more than one opponent and need to incapacitate them both in quick succession.

Day 4 - The Evil Eye

    Finally a semi-free day. I was able to make a few small adjustments to my weaponry between classes then waited until dark to roam the streets. The clouds from yesterday blew by leaving not a trace and letting the nearly full moon illuminate the streets, although that could also be from light pollution … I guess it is good that I can see and not trip, but I would've liked to be able to see the stars.

    The night started relatively calmly, I was finally getting used to the red haze that settled over the world when I used my goggles. If I ever learn how to actually code, I'll have to write a program to filter out the ambient light, but for now I would just have to let my eyes adjust. I got lucky in my positioning tonight, I hadn't seen any pattern in how The Eye chose their targets so I had decided to sit on a random tall roof top and was rewarded with a beam of red two blocks over. Although I had previously only seen an aura of red indicating The Eye's (this is gonna stick now isn't it?) presence, it wasn't hard to imagine that they had the ability to focus it. 

    I ran across the rooftops, which were thankfully connected, I'll have to figure something out for when they aren't. I guess I could run at street level but that is more crowded and less direct, plus heroes are known for leaping across roofs right? Regardless I soon arrived at where the beam had been and looked for the source. Below me on the street there was a fight going on and sure enough one of the combatants' hands were surrounded by an aura of red. Upon closer observation I was shocked to find out this wasn't a fight, it was a beating. The man The Eye was 'fighting' was just laying on the ground not even trying to defend themselves. It was clear to anyone watching that the fight was over and didn't need to be continued so why was The Eye still there? I called 911  and reported the situation so her victim could get some help. I doubted they would be moving by themselves any time soon. 

    After placing the call I turned my attention back to the street to apprehend The Eye myself, but they were already gone, an eye left on the ground above the injured man's head. I could already hear the sirens of the ambulance and knew he would be okay. I waited until the paramedics started treating him, then left. I spent the rest of the night searching for another sighting of The Eye to bring them in, but they seemed to have gone silent for the moment. I suppose I will have to try again tomorrow now that I had seen they were not only bad, they were straight up evil. Attacking someone for no reason at all.

Day 5 - The Conversation

    So classes were normal today and nothing special happened except well, I finally got to talk with the eye. I went out a little earlier than I usually did planning on scoping out some of the roofs on campus. Although I was currently preoccupied taking down The Eye who seemed to operate across the river, I knew I would be coming back to stop crime on campus eventually. There is a really nice iconic roof space above the main lobby of campus where I was planning to start. Up there you can see all around campus, sure it wasn't the tallest building, but it did have a great view.

    Anyway, I was up there planning to see what was what and keeping an eye out for any red flashes in the city when from behind I heard:

    "I thought they blocked off all entrances to the roof" they had, I have just been practicing picking locks. Yes I know that skill is rarely used for anything good, but sometimes it can come in handy, like tonight with the door

    I turned around expecting to see some other student, while it wasn't a common hang out spot, people definitely still came up here. Instead I was confronted with The Eye herself, what was she doing on this side of the river and at my school no less. Of course I immediately confronted her about her illegal activities and she scoffed at me. I mean she literally scoffed and called me naive, how am I naive when I saw her commit those crimes? Like seriously? It quickly became apparent that she wasn't remorseful at all and needed to be brought in. We had a brief altercation which I definitely nearly won if she hadn't taken a cheap shot and knocked me on my butt I would've had her. As it was I landed with a loud smack and was slightly dazed. The only sound I heard was "stay down, this isn't the world for you" When I got my bearings again, she was gone and I was alone on the roof. 

    I layed back down and stared at the sky. This is going to take more work than I thought, but I'm sure it can't be that much more.

Day 6 - A day to relax

    Not much happened today, I ended up sleeping through my alarm which I guess is a natural consequence of staying up into the early hours of the night every day for a week. I did my laundry, bought a few groceries and sloughed through some homework and … that was about it.

Day 7 - Coding is still the worst

    So I have a problem set due for my coding class and I swear this class should be worth twice the amount of credit listed on the syllabus based on how long it takes me to write a 'simple' program. I guess I am learning some things because I can follow the code examples given in class, but I definitely can't recreate them. I'm gonna need to find another way to code my goggles or get someone to do it for me. Superheroes have a man in the chair right?

    I eventually got the problem set turned in and started to draft ideas for the semi-automatic wristbow, still very rudimentary though.

[alwayschoosechocolate]

One-night stands and one-shot chances (Part iv)

University AU

Pairing: Jin x reader

Who says sex has to mean anything? Who says you can’t just screw around without all the heartache? Who says only guys get this privilege? What happens when the biggest playboy on campus suddenly meets his match and gets a taste of his own medicine?

Genre: casual sex, mentions of sex, bestfriend!Hoseok, onenightstand!Jin

Wordcount: 2000

Masterpost with the other parts of the story can be found here (x)

Tag list: @esplosionedicoloriintesta @jeonjunggoodgod @rjsmochii @spookidema @pariz-lover @mymochimchimmy @friedclamtoadbanana @cloudyelizabeth @livesmileandstaystrong

A/N: Tumblr has been fucking with me and deleted parts of this update so many times.. I lost count of how many times I rewrote it, and I feel like parts of it never really got back again. I'm only on my phone these days, so I have no idea, how long it is either, but I feel like it's rather short unfortunately - sorry! I'll make up for it in the next update!

The whispers heard from two rows behind you were only getting louder, and it had reached a point that made even Jimin send them a sour look.

Your focus, however, was solely on the professor in front of the board and the notes you were scribbling down. Rumors and bitchy comments were nothing new to you. Being part of the royalty on campus, as Hoseok and his mates were called because of the small spire on the house, came with a lot of attention, and being Hoseoks best friend had made you an honorary member as well.

"I swear to God, if they make any more comments about your hair, I will pull theirs out," Jimin mumbled under his breath, making you raise an eyebrow at him.

"Jimin, just leave it. If the best they've got is comments about my hair" - you shrugged your shoulders - "let them have their fun."

"Can't you please just talk back one time? I don't want them to think they can treat our friends like this."

Jimin was fidgeting in his seat and his voice had reached a whiny tone, but the reason for his demeanor was anything but cute. He wanted to fight back. He hated people for not respecting his friends, and he knew Hoseok wouldn't have hesitated to clap back at the girls. However, you hated people fighting your battles, and even though Hoseok did it all the time, it always resulted in arguments between the two of you. The rest of the guys had learned not to challenge you on this.

"Not yet, Jimin," you hummed, eyes still on the papers in front of you. Mumbling under his breath, he leaned back in his seat with crossed arms, settling for absorbing their voices, so he would know, which girls to add to his non-shag list. No way, he was sleeping with them, when they treated his friend like that, he thought with a huff.

"I don't get why she doesn't have any self-respect. She must really have some issues," one of them whispered a bit too loudly, definitely wanting you to hear her. "I mean, can't she see that she is ruining her life?"

"That's rich," you snorted loudly, finally turning around in your seat and putting a hand on Jimins shoulder in the process, keeping him from jumping at the girl. "Coming from you." You locked eyes with the girl in charge of most of the comments and sent her a sinister smile. "When is your due date again?”

Hearing Jimin snicker at your comment fueled you on further and the missing response from the girl only added to it.

"Your daughter must really be looking forward to getting a younger sister," you cooed in feigned interest. "I just feel bad, they don't get to have that idyllic family life you always talked about. But then again, family is what you make it, with the people you chose to have in it, right? Who am I to tell you, how to live your life?"

Sending her one last icy look, you turned back to the board, still hearing the girls whispering, but for a completely different reason this time. Everyone knew her on campus. She had made it her mission to spread the word of God on campus, which involved celibacy, no alcohol and for some reason also no sea food. Funny thing is, she didn’t see the double moral in herself being pregnant with a second child from a different guy. Instead, she had made it her life mission to preach about how sex ruins both body and mind, ruining you for the future. And Y/N was her favorite target.

-

"You're alright?", Jimin asked, as they walked to the café for their free period. It was drizzling a bit, covering the campus in a grey curtain, leaving you and Jimin alone, as everyone scrambled to get out of the rain.

"Of course. It's nothing new."

Throwing an arm around Jimins waist, leaning on him, as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder. You walked a bit in silence.

"Come on, I'll buy you a coffee," he smiled, pulling you into the warm café.

You bought your drinks and Jimin even bought you a muffin as well, and you found a table in the back, where you could lay out your books on the table to talk about some assignment, you had to hand in next week.

"Btw," Jimin interrupted you in the middle of a sentence. "Did you hear anything back about the job yet?"

"No, not yet," you mused, with a small smile. "But I'm sure they just have a lot of applicants to get through."

As true as that might be, it had also been two weeks since they were supposed to get back to you. Knowing that you weren't going home between semesters, you had always opted for working or doing internships, and this year one of the professors on campus was working on a big project and needed help. Not only was it a great way of earning some money and experience, the professors field of study was exactly what you wanted to go into yourself. It couldn’t be more perfect actually!

That is, if you got it.

You hadn't told anyone about it - not even Hoseok. A thought, that still made you a bit uncomfortable, since you normally shared everything. Jimin only knew, because your application had gotten mixed up with some notes, you shared with him.

"I'm sure, you'll get it," Jimin offered with a sweet smile and a warm hand on your arm. "They would be stupid not to take you in."

"I don't know," you smiled at him. "You've been getting better grades than me lately. Maybe you should apply, Jiminie?"

He snorted out a laugh, falling on to the table while he giggled.

"Yeah, right. Me, in a lab coat all summer? No, thank you."

Joining in his laughter, it took af few seconds for the both of you to calm down.

"Besides," he added, eyes turning sincere again. "The only reason, I get good grades is because of your help."

You scoffed and rolled your eyes at him, trying to pull your arm away from his grasp, but he only tightened his grip, making you look up into his smiling eyes.

"It's true, Y/N." His voice had gotten lower, and you felt your breath hitch at the close proximity of his face. "I couldn’t have made it through this last semester without you."

Letting yourself be hypnotized by his sweet words and demeanor, you suddenly realized who you were sitting across from.

"Aish, Jimin," you exclaimed in annoyance with an awkward laugh, snapping out of the trance. "Stop flirting with me! I already promised, we would work together on the year end project."

"Right," Jimin smiled sheepishly, rubbing his neck. "The year end project."

You had already turned back to your books and started suggesting topics for the upcoming assignments, when you got interrupted.

“You know, I’m not normally into the whole drowned-rat-look,” a sly voice commented, making both you and Jimin look up to see Jin walking towards you with a cocky smile. “But you really make it work, cupcake.”

Rolling your eyes at both his presence and words, you kept your gaze trained on the books on the table.

“Normally, I’m not into cocky guys with a nice body,” you retorted in a flat voice without missing a beat. “And you are no exception.”

“Ah, you think, I have a good body, doll?”, Jin cooed, as he dragged an extra chair to the table, making himself comfortable.

“Yeah, it does a perfect job of covering up all that sexism and…” – pausing to send him a confused look, you cocked your head at him – “Oh, I’m sorry. What are your other traits again?”

Hearing Jimins laughter fill the air, you sent Jin a cold smile, getting an annoyed look back.

“Damn. That’s cold, baby.” Jins voice was strained, trying to keep the tone light, but you easily picked up on the shadow of hurt looming in his eyes.

“But not uncalled for,” you reminded him, gathering your stuff and saying goodbye to Jimin, before walking out into the rain again.

Asshole. Thinking he could just go back to joking around again, after calling you a whore. Huffing a bit in anger, you walked towards the library to study there instead.

“Y/N!”

Groaning at the sound of his voice, you just kept walking.

“Hey. Wait up!”, Jin shouted, putting a hand on your shoulder, when he reached you.

Whipping around in annoyance, you saw him stumble half a step back in surprise at your sudden movement.

“What, Jin? What do you want?” Your voice was anything but welcoming, and if he had taken just two seconds to think about what he was about to do, he should have known better.

Oh well.

“I wanted to talk to a pretty lady, and you just happen to fit that bill,” he grinned at you, making you roll your eyes.

"Oh, lucky me! I get to be your designated whore of the day," you exclaimed in feigned excitement.

"What? No, that's..."

"Cut to the case, Seokjin. I'm not in the mood today." Crossing your arms in front over your chest, you sent him an impatient look.

"Well, erm." He coughed awkwardly, searching for the words. "I just wanted to apologize. You know, for calling you..."

"A whore," you stated, giving an evil smirk, when you saw him visibly tense at the sound of it.

"Yeah, that." He mustered every ounze of sincerity he could before continuing. "I'm sorry, I did that. It was uncalled for."

His eyes searched yours to see if you accepted the apology, but was hurriedly cast down by the sound of you clicking your tongue.

"Yeah, it was uncalled for. So why did you?" Curiousity taking over, you still wanted to know why, despite the anger.

Seokjin awkwardly shifted his weight from one foot to the other, trying to come up with an explanation. Dammit! He shouldn't feel this uncomfortable in front of you. Get it together, Jin!

He was at a loss, so he did what he knew always worked. Or used to work at least.

Straightning up a bit, he sent you a shameless grin.

"You're just so hot, doll! I don't like the idea of other men seeing that body," he winked at you, reaching for your hand.

The second, the words left his mouth, he knew he was screwed. And if his own intuition was enough, he was about to find out.

"Oh, I see!", you cooed at him, smiling sinisterly, when you saw his frightned expression at your tone. "You think, because I slept with you once, you own me."

Jin looked like he had just been pushed out of a cliff, and was now frantically searching for somewhere to hold on.

"What? No, that's not..."

His comicly widened eyes and pouting lips made him look almost too innocent.

Almost.

"Shh," you shushed, reaching up to cup his cheek. "Let me tell you something." Tightning you grasp on his jaw, you saw his eyes widen in surprise. "I am not someone for you to stick your dick in like a flagpole. You do not have, or will ever have, any claim on me. Got it?"

Your stern eyes bore into his startled ones. Despite the height difference, you had no problem displaying your position. It made Jin feel powerless, and he really didn't like being in that position. It made his blood boil, and his brain go into overdrive.

"I don't need to claim you," he spat out, venom suddenly present in his voice. "You've been with so many that you're basically public property by now."

Feeling his own blood run cold at his words, he pushed your hand off his face, looking at your shocked features defiantly.

"You should feel lucky that I even payed you any attention after getting my share," he stated with an annoyed huff, before turning around and basically speedwalking away from you, heart thumbing in his chest.

Oh, he was so screwed..

// Part v //

[ikonislife]

My Professor 6

-Hanbin x Reader (Professor!Hanbin)

-1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

-It was universally known that friend with benefit between best friends would be a chaotic ride from the start till the heartbreak of either one or both party. No one says anything about being in one with your dear professor…

-Rated M for language, mention of sex (secretly rated B for bullshit 😏)

A/n: Short fillers and some fluff coming at ya. I’m setting up for something big and I hope it’ll all be worth the wait for you guys in the end, that’s all i want, for the series to live up to your expectation (:

“Come in!”

Friend or foe, the question weights heavily on your worn out mind as the bright incandescent assaults your bloodshot eyes with the creaking of the door. A timid greeting left your lips at the sudden realization of just how much time had escaped from your grip and how bothersome this must be for the young professor.

“Hi. I’m sorry for coming by so late. I just was doing homework and there’s this one problem. I didn’t realize how late it had gotten.” Bitting your lips over your half lie. True that you weren’t all aware of the time but truly it was because you had stormed over in a fit of jealousy, homework wasn’t even remotely on your mind.

“No problem at all! After all, if I don’t have a little time for my sister in law then what good am I?!” Cheery albeit the haggardness that had begun to settle over the once impeccable model, three buttons far away from their home and a fourth hanging on for its dear life revealing nearly too much of the smooth skin to be appropriate. The near pushed back hair ruffled and strayed, no doubt a result of his frustration if your judgment is correct after hearing the endless groan of pain during the exam last week.

“PROFESSOR!” You had screamed, an effort to remind him of his careless word only to end in hushes and whispers realizing what you had just done probably brought in way more attention. “You can’t just call me that here? People know me here!”

“Oh and they don’t know me?” lip smacking, his eyes rolling so far back Jiwon near looking possessed before continuing. “Just Jiwon is fine, and everyone else left. Just me and my own poor soul suffering tonight.”

“Ah.”

Bag thrown and body sinking into the barely worn chair, your eyes begin wandering, taking in the sight of the incredible mess so strikingly opposite of your own dear professor. Who would’ve thought for someone whom care so greatly about his own appearance, the state of his living condition is… well abysmal. If the same is to say of his home, you’re feeling quite sorry for whoever it might be to become your future “sister in law” if there is a future where all three of you thrive and flourish together into the old age.

“What brings you to this neck of the wood? Homework you said…” Something in the tone of his voice doesn’t sit well with the herd of butterflies in your gut. Something playful, almost as if you’re just playing a losing cat and mouse game in the way his knowing smirk makes its way onto those lips just before uttering anything related to Hanbin. This mysterious person that your boyfriend seemingly trusted his life to, can he truly be trusted. Ever since the door to his humble office had swung open, there’s just a touch of something you couldn’t quite put your fingers on, like the fog of an early morning - clearly visible yet not quite there at the same time. “… Or is it someone?”

His words striking your attention away from the many things strewn across the small room, your mind near frozen as if he had caught onto it playing detective, gathering hints to further unlock Jiwon’s true character.

“Hmm…”

“So it is someone. Heejin?”

“Who?”

“Geez, Y/n. If you’re going to be rivals, at the least know the opponent’s game.” Damn him and his professor’s intuition and insightfulness.

“Who say there’s even a competition. For there to be rivals and opponents, there must be first a competition. Am I right?” You’re not quite certain if Jiwon is mildly amused or actually impressed with your words by the curve of his lips nor his sharp eyes… but his manner relaxed, leaning right into his chair making it his bitch in the way he so intimately gripping at the armrests.

“Okay, okay. Fair point.” Silent follows yet for reason unknown it wasn’t a sullen break, something inside your heart compels, instill a sense of trust for the man sitting just across the way. “Do you trust him?”

“What?” That question caught you off guard once more in every way possible even if this time, your eyes had been trained on the young professor the entire time. It thrown you off the path because how could a simple sentence, a mere four words uttering so effortlessly could carry an impact is so great it shook your soul.

Do you trust him.

Well, you’d like to think so for how risky the nature of your relationship turned out to be even if your demise would for certain bring about his own. However, never in a million year would you want for the basis of trust between you and the man your heart aches for to be merely one of survival. He has just as much to lose as you are but beyond safety, do you really trust just him.

Would you trust him to hold your hand when you’re facing your worst fear, or even just when you’re getting a flu shot because damn those needles and their scary pointy nature. After a long night of partying, can you trust him to lay you in bed, tuck you in, and kiss you goodnight to only then take his own place beside you without asking for favors in return.

After all, you known the man mere months and have gotten betrayed by others you knew for years. Who to say this Hanbin, the caring gentleman you know is nothing but just a persona put on for show masking away the real him.

“I sense hesitant.” Jiwon speaks up once more, words just as concise and to the point as they had been. You should be more wary of this person seemingly psychic in his thought but it’s absolutely the opposite. You want more out of him, want for him to speak his mind until you’re completely vulnerable and begging for him to stop because maybe then, you’ll finally gain insight into his and Hanbin’s relationship... Ultimately, perhaps you’ll finally stop being in the shadow with your own relationship.

“No, not at all. I just-“

“It’s okay to be hesitant, Y/n. Actually, I expected for you to have a least a few questions. It’s only natural for you to…Strange if you don’t.” The man pauses, thought much too hard to realize into words. “I wouldn’t necessary say concern, perhaps at the least bit curious about his life?”

That all knowing smirk, the uneasiness stirring within your gut is hard to ignore when each of Jiwon’s word striking your heart as if dart to bullseye, no, bullet to target. The small creek that was the difference between yourself and the young professors had suddenly widen into a vast ocean. How could these guys be just a few years older than yourself, mature and wise with wit to match. What is this chill roaming, squeezing itself in between each of the bone in your body. Perhaps their world, this realm completely unknown to a mere average child like yourself is no place to find love… Perhaps you should take a lost. After all, that rumbling deep within your soul reminds you so much of the time you had wandered accidentally into a brand name store that you’d have to sell a kidney and an arm to afford, watching as girls half your age without a second thought near bought half the store. It’s a world you know nothing of, a world you could only admire from afar, and a world perhaps has no place for someone like you. Not that Hanbin and Jiwon somehow is disdainful of your naiveness, nor are they derisive toward your innocence. Rather, you’re just unsure if you should be amongst adults where the word love actually carries weight when you barely could handle a crush. 

“I’d lay my life down for that man.” You try, you really try your to decipher the calmness behind his sharp eyes but there’s not much else when the powerful stare convey nothing but honesty. “That much I can say. However, I get it, I get that you barely know the guy for not even half a year with nothing to offer but this…this person, this seemingly great professor you see on campus. So popular, so charming. For all you know, he could be a fuck up that know how to put on a good show.”

“So, would you like some coffee?” Intrigued and definitely interested, your excitement to learn of the life Hanbin holds outside this campus, outside the confine of his own home - about the extent of his outside you know of - has you teetering at the edge of your seat, coffee intended for the tastebud of someone else offered in exchange.

Somewhere in the darken path between his own building and the much younger building where the young physics professor resides, Hanbin wanders, wonders what had kept you from answering his 10 billionth attempt at any sort of attention and lord knows attention is exactly what he craves today. Now he knows in his heart that fear has no place in this web of relationship between you, him, and Jiwon. However, and perhaps by recent event, in the dark corner of his mind there still is a bit of reservation, a reservation that no doubt will ring guilt when he’s no longer delirious from the long day and late night of being entertain by someone he would much rather never had introduced himself to if he could turn back the hands of the clock.

He thinks of your lies again and again only to clutch at his chest when that image of the kid named Hoseok devouring your lips so passionately flashes in his mind like a horror film. Then he thought of those days where both him and Jiwon were young and naive, fresh face and know nothing of the pain of love. It may not look it now but there was a point in time when Hanbin could only look at Jiwon with awe in the way he so effortlessly carry himself, the way he command the crowd just with a flash of his charming smile and raspy voice. Would you too eventually falls for the allure of the man he calls best friend?

Surely not if Hanbin follows his heart but the scene he had just walked into speak otherwise, your laughter so crisp and bright emanating through the dimly lit hallway, tearing away the cold night. A peek into the room reveal a scene Hanbin aren’t quite sure what to think of as Jiwon near sprawl his whole body atop his desk, bicep flexing with your fingers so daintily smoothing over the impressive muscles.

“Am I interrupting something?” Hanbin’s disappointed with himself and the tone his words hold, disappointed that he couldn’t hold his jealousy in no longer and had to do whatever it takes to stop your contact, disappointed that he even feel the need to be jealous in the first place.

“Oh hey. We were talking about Heejin. You know how she always like touches our arms. You know what I’m talking about right, Binnie?”

“Uhm, yea. Doesn’t really explain why my girlfriend needs to touch your arm though.” If this had been an anime, Hanbin’s glare would’ve materialized and no doubt sharp enough to cut off Jiwon’s head. “Say, Y/n, isn’t that my coffee?”

Is it wrong that your heart rejoices with the low growls of jealousy, the way he so possessively breathed out the word “girlfriend” then so softly, as if wanting to be stern but couldn’t in the face of your smile when he addressed your name”.

“Yea, it was. You were occupied so I offered it to Jiwon as an incentive.” Jiwon might be backing down but you sure aren’t, still bitter although you’re not entirely sure why. It’s not as though Hanbin could really control when the wicked witch might ride through on her nasty broomstick.

Taken back by your brazen words perhaps much more than the fact that you had just addressed his best friend by his first name, Hanbin retreat, not wanting much more drama tonight as he had enough to last a good year. A quick goodbye later and you’re shadowing the seemingly fuming man down the faintly lighted hallway as his silent steps grew heavy. Did you crossed the line? You swore with your all to make him happy, to be there yet not even a day later here he is once again sullen.

“Hanbin…” Your heart ache, grasping at your meek voice in the way it came out so small, not dare to add fuel to his fire.

“Yea.” He replied simply.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know if I, I might’ve been harsh with my words. I know none of it is really your fault.” You’ve gotten used to it, disconnecting yourself from your man even though words of the heart is being spun, to any onlooker, you both simply heading the same direction.

“Sweetheart, stop. I’m not mad if that’s what you’re thinking. I just, I wish it was me you were laughing and joking with. Especially so soon after all that had happened, i just wish it was me” It’s taking his all not to turn around and hug you, just a few feet behind him there you walk, probably slumping and pouting as you do when something is upsetting yet he couldn’t do anything. That hurts more than anything this very second. “When we get home, I’m going to hug you and not let go. The only reason I haven’t yet is, I’m sure as obvious to you as it is me. Don’t mistake necessity for desire, what I want to do and what I am forced to do are two very different things.”

The rest of your walk in silent, you headed to your car while he to his office with nothing else but a faint smile to bid a temporary goodbye. You found yourself jogging, near running back to your car and the backpack heavy with book hastily thrown into the backseat. The old junk rumbling start and sped out to where Hanbin always park, slowly you pull into the empty spot right next to his shining horse, engine stalled as you wait patiently for his arrival. You didn’t know when but it seemed as though your fingers had landed on the mushy playlist full of love songs Hanbin had made even though your choice in music this late of night usually consist of heavy bass and loud guitars to shoo the sandman away.

Wasn't long till your car finding itself screeching a halt in front of that familiar driveway lined with green hedges that quite honestly taken you by surprise the first time you had been to his place. Who knew the ever busy professor actually got time for gardening, a very impressive garden at that flourishing in flower despite the breeze of approaching winter. It makes you wonder how magnificent this place must be in the height of spring. None of that matter now as your eyes lazily travel back to what really matters, Hanbin juggling his many bags and the key to the front door yet that handsome smile of his still bright to greet you.

“Beat me again. I swear, if this whole math thing doesn’t pan out for you, just become a professional racer.” Teasing smile on his lips but no sooner than the familiar beep of the security system sealing both away from the big bad wolves of the world resonates excitement within your chest, his smile already melted into a kiss so desperate you felt your soul being knocked out of your body.

His kiss like waves of summer beach, warm and gentle yet what it does to your heart, the intensity of thousand tsunamis. Lips chapped but you don’t mind as they envelopes yours in an intricate routine of teeth clashing and tongue, resembling that wondrous feeling of digging your toes into the coarse sand, letting yourself sinking into the embrace of the ocean. His hands gentle as the water lapping the shore yet rough in their neediness of feeling the warmth of your skin under his fingertips, skin so smooth and soft just as he remembers, just as he dreamt off for so long. You’re real. No longer will he awaken, body slicked with cold sweat and heavy pants deep seated in his chest because all that was left was the bitter taste of an unsatisfied break up, if he could even called it that. You were so close yet million miles away in the split second he caught your cold, contemptuous gaze in the passing crowd and that should’ve been his cue to stay away, to learn how to be content with a live without you but it only drawn him closer, light a fire under the craving that could only be satisfied with your smile. 

“I miss you so much.” Soft words utters against your bruised lips, gentle pants and hot breath fanning a silent that convey all the desire to be alone, to truly be lost within one another. You couldn’t recall the last time you were truly alone with Hanbin, to be completely yourself without the fear of being discover. There’s no word to express just how valuable this moment right this second is to the both of you, heart beating fast for a love barely coming out of its shell like a small sprout signaling better days after a hurricane.

You love him, you truly love this man… And best of all, he loves you just the same.

[meepface]

Evens for the ask thing!

thank you this was fun and extremely time consuming (which is good because i have nothing to do ever)!!

200: My crush’s name is:

Caitlin!!

198: I am really:

gay

196: My eye color is:

green

194: My ring size is:

uhhh @ caitlin: mine is a 5 right

192: I am allergic to:

shrimp i think, possibly red wine also, the fake metal they put in earrings, cedar pollen, also i’m lactose intolerant which i’m assuming counts here

190: My 1st job was:

TCBY frozen yogurt

188: My bed is:

the only place i can really fall asleep and Stay asleep

186: My best friend:

is the cutest look at us!!

184: Xbox or ps3:

xbox but i’ve never played ps3 so i’m biased

182: In my pockets:

they are empty

180: Marriage is:

not something i Need but if my partner wants it i will get married, i just don’t believe i need to get married to be committed to someone for life. it’s just never been as big of a deal to me as it is to most people but i would marry Caitlin in a heartbeat

178: My mom:

is the kindest most accepting and supportive person i know!! she is so great i love my mom look at her

176: Last YouTube video watched:

i sort of started this one by Miles Mckenna but i stopped to do this lmao

174: Do you have any siblings?

one brother!

172: Are you taller than your mom?

no

170: What did you do yesterday?

yesterday i worked until 3 and then visited Caitlin and then went home and saw my family for a bit and then went back to visit Caitlin at her work again until she got off and then her and i went and got a cinnabon and she talked to my boss about getting a job at my work and he basically interviewed her and guaranteed her the job on the spot and then i took her to dairy queen so she could get a blizzard and then we kissed a lil and went home!! a good day

[ I Believe In ]

168: Luck:

yeah i guess

166: Yourself:

honestly?? yes i have really started to!!!

164: Heaven:

idk i like to think it’s real but i feel like i logically think it isn’t but i also feel like who knows you know

162: God:

i believe there’s probably some sort of God but i don’t necessarily identify with really any religion and never really have so i think sure there’s probably something up there helping us out but who knows what lmao just be good to people and respect everyone’s beliefs and we’ll find out later

160: Soul mates:

i don’t believe everyone has just one i think everyone has multiple soulmates in multiple different fields (like platonic, romantic, etc) and i think that everyone has several people in each field that they could really click with like idk i refuse to believe there’s only one soulmate for everyone and too bad if you don’t find them

158: Gay Marriage:

absolutely. this is just common sense. i’m not big into the concept of marriage but i know damn well i don’t want that right taken from me if i choose to marry

156: Orbs:

idk no tbh 

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses:

uhh i love both a lot but i’m always down for hugs n cuddles

152: Phone or Online:

online??

150: Blondes or Brunettes:

i’ve always liked brunettes but then Caitlin came along and changed the whole damn game for me so now i really don’t know. blondes but like, only Caitlin and nobody else

148: Summer or winter:

winter

146: Chocolate or vanilla:

boring, give me mint chocolate chip

144: Oranges or Apples:

oranges

142: McDonalds or Burger King:

i don’t really care for either but burger king i guess bc their chicken fries are good

140: Mac or PC:

mac just bc i’m so far up apple’s ass

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor:

sweet and poor lol? 

136: Hillary or Obama:

obama

134: Singing or Dancing:

i like to sing because sometimes i can sing well and whenever i dance i look like an embarrassing dad chaperoning a middle school dance but trying to be cool and dancing along

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks:

who

130: Wal-Mart or Target:

target is my second home

128: Manicure or Pedicure:

manicure ig

126: Your Birthday or Christmas:

christmas!! i love givin people gifts

124: Disney or Six Flags:

six flags

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War:

stop (but sometimes it’s necessary)

120: Gay Marriage:

again, it’s common sense lol marriage is for everyone who wants to get married

118: Abortion:

it’s the person with the uterus’ choice

116: Reality TV:

i dig it ngl

114: Back stabbers:

dumb

112: Facebook:

it’s nice but people who use it excessively are obnoxious and people who excessively share/comment their opinions on it are also obnoxious. take a break live offline a little

110: My Neighbors:

i have nice neighbors one of them is wealthy because he’s the drummer of a famous christian band so they’re always either throwing parties of out of the country and then my other neighbor lives alone with her annoying dog Chewy who roams the roads of our neighborhood and chases cars and almost dies and then my Other neighbors have an annoying ass kid named Sabrina who set loose one of my pet bunnies when i was little and i never forgave her. also one of my neighbors used to have a meth lab here but he got caught 

108: Designer Clothes:

rock those clothes if you can afford them

106: Sports:

i don’t get into them but i don’t hate them either. i used to want to be in softball or tennis or basketball when i was in high school but i never tried out

104: The future:

bring it on (gently)

[ Last time I ]

102: Last time you ate:

i had some froyo about two hours ago

100: Cried in front of someone:

i cried in front of my therapist a little last Wednesday

98: Took a vacation:

my family and i went to NYC for a few days right before Christmas last year

96: Changed a diaper:

i never have honestly

94: Went to a wedding:

oh man it’s been years but it was my cousin’s wedding and he has two kids now and my other cousin got way too drunk and disappeared from the reception and we found her at a starbucks eating dried fruit that she bought

92: Got a piercing:

forever ago BUT i think i’m finally going to pierce my ears for the second time on Friday!! i hope i stop talking about it and actually do it

90: Texted: 

i texted Caitlin like 20 minutes ago and i need to text her back but i keep doing this (sorry babe i love u i see ur texts give me just a minute ok)

[ MISC ]

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is:

my brother, my dogs, my parents, the comfort of my comfy bed and my big room, my dad’s cooking, no neighbors close by so it’s always nice & quiet

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most:

figuring out what i want in my life and getting myself there, my music fest this summer, pride, my friend’s 21st bday, seeing my girlfriend tomorrow, learnin how to love myself even more, therapy next wednesday (no particular order)

84: People call me:

elyse, that ginger girl

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket:

i have not!! one time a cop pulled me over when i was going 10 over with Caitlin in the car and my insurance was months expired and he asked where we were going and we had to tell him we were just going mini golfing. he set me free with just a warning

80: The first person i talked to today was:

well i texted Caitlin first thing in the morning but i spoke to my mom, so

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from:

Caitlin probs, she can always tell when something’s wrong

76: Right now I am talking to:

well i would be talking to Caitlin if i would pause this for a second to text her back (i am so sorry babe i am on a roll please forgive me)

74: I have/will get a job:

i have a job at TCBY frozen yogurt right now but i am planning to get a second job (maybe at target or petsmart?) and test it out and use TCBY as my fallback just in case they don’t work. TCBY is such a chill happy job so i don’t wanna give it up quite yet. plus i get employee of the month all the time because my boss loves me, sooo

72: Today:

i had work until 4 and i was super duper productive so that felt really great!! i got a compliment from a customer and my boss!! and i made $7 in tips which was a lot considering how slow it was!! and then i visited Caitlin for like 5 minutes maybe and then i went to therapy and got froyo at menchie’s with my mom and then came home it was a good day!!!

70: Next Weekend:

i have no plans that i’m aware of yet. i am probably working though

68: The worst sound in the world:

a fork or knife scraping against a plate. my entire body shivers

66: People that make you happy:

caitlin, my mom, all my friends, my brother, my dad, my grandma, a few of my coworkers, my regular who always compliments my eyebrows, the guy who makes me breakfast tacos at this food trailer nearly every morning, my internet friends, my therapist

64: My friends are:

so great and supportive and positive. i love all of em so much

62: My School:

its so nice!!!! it was great going from a high school in an all white conservative small town in texas to a very diverse and liberal and happy college. i love it there and the campus is beautiful and i’ve made so many lovely supportive friends and i see my girlfriend every day!! and my classes have all been good (except modern biology 1300)

60: I lose all respect for people who:

are ignorant and disrespectful to others for no good reason, people who are rude to their waiters, people who can’t seem to mind their own business, people who slut shame, people who are racist/homophobic/xenophobic/etc,

58: Your hair color is:

red !! look at how cute i am 

56: Favorite web site:

runescape HIGHKEY

54: The worst pain I was ever in was:

physical was probably when something was seriously fucked with my stomach last year and it was Cramping and the doctor said it was a stomach bug but it felt like i was actually dying, emotional i do not want to talk about publicly !

52: My room is:

a disgusting depression cave and i should clean it now that i’m feelin good again

50: Where would you like to be:

with my girlfriend or maybe in iceland (or both)

48: Ever been in love:

currently

46: More guy friends or girl friends:

as a kid i had more guy friends but as i’ve grown i have more girl friends! this bitch learned

44: One person that you wish you could see right now:

my girlfriend !! also it would be nice to see my grandpa and grandma again i miss them a lot sometimes :( 

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die:

i have!! one of my best friends and i are gonna go skydiving after we graduate college so soon i will get to check something off so that’s exciting to me

40: Last person I got mad at:

one of my parents, i think it was my dad most recently

38: I wish I was a professional:

psychologist 

[ My Favorites ]

36: Vehicle:

i don’t have one lol hondas are nice bc i have one and it is nice

34: State visited:

i really loved oregon and south dakota and montana!! california would be nice to revisit because i hardly remember it but i’m sure i’d love it there too. and i loved ohio for sentimental reasons 

32: Athlete:

venus williams

30: Actress:

shit i don’t know probably Emma Stone since she’s my real mom

28: Band:

twenty one pilots because i’m a fake deep emo loser and i hate myself :/ 

26: Grocery store:

HEB (only texans get this like if u agree)

24: Movie:

probably either The Secret Life of Walter Mitty or Silver Lining’s Playbook 

22: Animal:

i love bears and also bunnies

20: Holiday:

Christmas

18: Sport to play:

tennis and basketball and baseball are fun!!

16: Book:

the entire Junie B Jones series

14: Beach:

i don’t have one i hate them all (a beach in Hawaii would be really nice to go to though since the water isn’t like…. gross there)

12: Thing to cook:

i can’t cook don’t get me near a kitchen or the house will burn

10: Restaurant:

Hunan Lion, it’s a lil chinese food restaurant that like nobody knows about or cares about or goes to but it’s SO GOOD and i could eat there every day

8: Yankee candle scent:

shit i don’t know whatever smells like christmas

6: Flower:

sunflowers & daisies

4: Talk show host:

ellen degeneres & seth meyers & jimmy fallon

2: Dog breed:

i like border collies and golden retrievers and french bulldogs

(OKAY I WILL TEXT YOU BACK NOW CAITLIN I LOVE YOU)

[bananashemmo]

When We Collide (Part 4)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: PG-All

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

”I’m here, spill all the details!”

It was as if a huge morning shock went through your body when Nicole practically slammed herself in front of the coffee machine to get your attention and almost made you drop the package of white coffee cops you were about to take out.

“What are you talking about?” You confusedly questioned, you had been so caught up in your own business that your heart had skipped a beat or two by her small jump scare.

She rolled her eyes as if you were playing totally dumb and placed the tray on the counter next to her. She had a little bit of flour sprinkled on her cheek but you decided not to warn her now because she was so caught up in whatever she was thinking you couldn’t pass through the barrier.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” Her face showed annoyance but her tone was way different, you almost heard it as seductive.

You still didn’t say anything but sighed deeply trying to think back. Nothing came to the top of your head but you assumed it was something big because usually she wouldn’t have the time to run up to you and speak during the mornings at work. She had a busy schedule and you knew she would only be here for an hour before she would hurry to her classes.

“You have absolutely no idea what I’m referring to, right?” She asked in a boring tone and sighed deeply to herself. Strands of hair were falling down from her large bun and she tensed less in her shoulders having to explain.

“Gossip has been spread between the offices this morning that Mr. Hemmings took someone home after the party. Now I know, it’s not something knew but I have a feeling that’s it you because you haven’t said a word since we left and you even forgot to send me your ‘I’m safety home’ message.”

If it hadn’t been for the fact that you had woken up this morning to the owner of your dorm room knocking furiously on the door at 6 A.M you would have reacted way different. The only thing you could do was stare at her with no emotion on your face.

“It wasn’t me.” You stated and to prove that you weren’t lying you leaned forward to start the coffee machine to distract your face. You had always been a good liar after all but Nicole could be spot on at times. Just like she was now and you hadn’t spoiled a single thing to her.

“Yeah right.” She laughed and leaned her arm on top of the coffee machine, watching your every move with the biggest smile growing on her face.

You quivered an eyebrow suspiciously by her expression, you didn’t want to know what was going on in her mind. She sometimes assumed the worst picture scenarios possible, she had a dirty mind and people wouldn’t think that because her attitude seemed like the sweetest girl next door possible.

Leaning forward to place the cup below the coffee machine you tried to ignore her but failed horribly. You wanted to erase the night out because it had only been a drunken crash on whatever Italian bed you had been resting on, you couldn’t remember half the things Patrick had explained once you were there.

“Nicole let me tell you one thing.” You admitted, catching her attention and saw as she most assumingly prepared herself for some good old gossip.

“There’s no way in hell I would ever sleep with ‘Mr. Hemmings’. He’s a straight up asshole without lack of situation awareness, respect for the opposite genders and doesn’t know how to behave properly in the society we live in.”

You would have expected her to widen her eyes by having you reading her mind but she kept quiet and quivered an eyebrow instead. You felt confused by her reaction you had expected her to shake her head in disbelief but she only looked over your shoulder with a surprised look on her face.

“The asshole is here!” Luke almost loudly announced with the biggest smile on his face and you saw how you almost looked like a ghost in the face by your reflection in the window in front of you.

Your jaw fell as you turned around to look up at him, his hair freshly pulled back with some fancy hair wax and his grey suit fitting him nicely. You had no idea what to say but your jaw was slowly falling down to touch the top of your feet.

“I uh…” You mumbled confused not knowing how to save the situation but it wasn’t necessary because Luke was quick to change the subject and make everything even worse than it already was.

“I bought you this.” He announced and lifted up a pink striped bag from Victoria’s Secret, your eyes widening even more than before and you could feel how your cheeks already prepared to heat up in an embarrassing blush.

You didn’t like where this was going especially not because he was having that smile on his face that told he was about to throw some sort of explosive bomb.

“After you forgot your bra at my place this weekend and that you apparently buy your underwear at target I couldn’t not buy this for you. Now I don’t really know why you forgot your bra in the first place but something tells me you will be very happy for this. It’s black and purple, lace and sexy as hell.”

There it was, the blush starting from your cheeks and spread down to your neck. Luke almost wanted to push the bag into your embrace when you didn’t react, you barely flicked your muscle but it was most probably because you could practically see Nicole’s face from your behind.

“But if you actually want that old bra thing back you know where I live.” He winked, letting go of the bag so you were forced to grab it, watching him walk past you and nodded down at Nicole.

“Good morning Penelope.”

You rolled your eyes by the fact that he still hadn’t learned Nicole’s name yet, she even had a damn name tag! Not to mention she was wearing it right on her boob so it was surprising Luke hadn’t glanced down. But there was too many thoughts at once for you to multiply what had just happened and you looked back at Nicole.

She wasn’t just surprised she was completely shocked and you thought there was no way in hell you could save this but you had to. In reality nothing had happened when you closed the door right in Luke’s face but now when you thought about it you had forgotten your bra after hanging it up to dry.

“You dirty little fucker.” Was the first thing she said after a full minute of silence and she shook her head almost in disbelief with a huge smirk on her face.

“I fucking knew it!”

“We didn’t do anything!” You yelled almost too loudly in frustration, almost wanting to knock down the bag not even curious to what was actually hiding inside of it.

“Sure you fucking did I know you Y/N.” Nicole laughed and curiously took a look down in the bag hell she wanted to see what he had bought for you. At least she had a bit of care, you just wanted to put it in the nearest trashcan because if you kept it, it meant he would get his will once again.

“No I swear to god we didn’t do anything.” You gave in and gave her the back fully to explain yourself, “I was on my way home in the rain, he showed up out of nowhere in this giant ass car and he politely took me home so I could sleep at this place for the night. I know this sounds like bow chica wowwow but I swear to god we weren’t near each other in any way. I even had a room for myself where I slept for the night and before he could show up in the morning in only his underwear I left! It was the reason why I forgot my bra because I was in such a hurry!”

It was almost as if the smirk on her face disappeared ever so slowly as if she was almost disappointed. She looked between the bag and you while listening, she had almost hoped you would actually sleep with him just because it would be the biggest gossip around campus.

“So you didn’t sleep with him? Not even a small hand troll under the sheets?” Her voice was almost above a whisper and she faintly heard her name being called by the kitchen boss standing behind the counter with an angry expression on his face.

“No, nothing happened and nothing will ever happen.” You replied in serious tone just to show her that this wasn’t something to me kidding about, “Plus after work today I will go over to the mall and return these. He needs to understand that he can’t cover up his shitty personality by buying stuff in replacement!”

You took the bag out of her hands almost to her surprise and she looked down at the bag almost as if he she had become hurt by your actions.

“But Y/N come on look how expensive it is imagine how it must feel to wear and if-,” She paused in track by the look you were giving her, trying to prove that there was no way in hell you would keep this.

“Or you can get the money back and forget completely how sexy you would actually look in this.” She said instead and almost quoted what Luke had told minutes ago.

You sighed carefully and looked into the bag, it did in fact look pretty expensive but instead of keeping it you rather wanted to sell and use it to pay rent. Maybe that meant you could save a day extra and wouldn’t have to think about moving out already. You could almost imagine the face of the dorm owner once you would force a stack of money in his face.

“Nicole we have a cafeteria to serve right now, get your ass over here!” The kitchen boss yelled once his temper had finally come to the point of boiling, he had been polite and patient but now he didn’t want to wait anymore.

Nicole’s eyes widened once she came back to reality and remembered she was actually at work and in instinct she touched her cheek and brushed away the small amount of flour. She looked back at you in apology but you nodded your head regardless, you had someone to confront that couldn’t wait a second.

“I’ll see you around babe.” She said and gave you a short hug, hurrying back towards the counter with her tray and filled it up with cups of coffee.

You stood to yourself in your thoughts without really doing anything, trying to let everything sink in and finally pressed down on the coffee starter. You weren’t even that tired after wall but you had grown addicted to this special latte that they served here.

You tried to stabilize the coffee in your hand while rushing towards the elevator and took the many floors up until you finally arrived at your office. You barely cared about the mess you had created once you had thrown your own personal bag and the Victoria secret one onto the counter of already messy papers.

You could already see he was inside his office and after taking a large sip of the very hot coffee you tried to brush off the burning sensation on your tongue and almost busted the door open.

Luke wasn’t even startled by the sudden noise, it was almost as if he had expected you to arrive and he stopped from swirling a pencil between his long fingers.

“Coming to say thank you for the underwear? Also you were so quick to leave last Friday you didn’t even get the chance to order scrambled eggs or say good morning.” He grinned lightly and moved his legs down from his desk to roll the chair closer to the wooden surface.

You almost groaned loudly by his question and removed yourself from the door without wanting to shut it, if he wanted to brag about pulling his assistant home after a party they might as well also wanted to hear the outcome of it.

“What’s the matter with you?” You almost questioned loudly but your tone didn’t have the slightest affection on him.

“Not much,” He replied back and stood up from his chair, “I went to the hairdresser today, took a small run at the gym and now I’m here. Oh, not to mention that I ordered Patrick to buy your clothes, he really has a great taste in bras doesn’t he?”

“Yes-, but-, No that’s not important!” You were confused for one second but you didn’t have the time for that and focused back on why you had showed up at his office in the first place.

“You need to understand that you can’t buy me okay! So what if I buy bras at Target, they’re nice they’re cheap and I don’t have anyone to show them to other than me so they’re perfectly fine!” You said everything so fast you almost believed he didn’t catch up but he sure did.

“Fine I’ll buy bras from Target from now on, can’t you like get 10 for like $5?” Luke rolled his eyes as if it was him giving in and giving you the will but you only shook your head in disagreement and ran a hand through your hair frustrated.

“No Luke you’re not supposed to buy anything and even more no you have no idea how fucking expensive bras are!” You argued, you literally only had four bras, now only three because he still had yours and you didn’t want to say you wanted it back because that meant you would have to show up at his place again.

“If it’s such a huge problem to you that bras are expensive why the hell won’t you let me buy you some?” He questioned like you were dumb and you took yourself to the head by the insane conversation you were having.

“Why are we discussing about bras!?” You yelled at him, seeing his eyes widening.

“I don’t know you were the one showing up at my office in the first place!” He yelled back, feeling how the tone had suddenly changed but it wasn’t as if you were angry at each other.

You looked at him confusedly not knowing what to do but then again, the only way to stop the conversation would be to leave. You had learned from now that trying to discuss with Luke would literally be impossible, he could be arguing with a wall and would still think he had won.

Turning around on your feet you hurried out of his office but not without a small trip with the stupid high heels but it was something you had grown used to. You didn’t know what to do with yourself because you hadn’t even heard today’s program but you could start out by turning on your computer.

“Y/N…” Luke was quick to walk into your office and grabbed your arm to turn you around and make you look at him.

He wasn’t looking as frustrated as he did before and you quivered an eyebrow. He didn’t say anything but still kept his hand on your arm, you could feel how there was still a tension in the air that lingered, clouding right above your heads.

“We look at each other like we’re about to kiss.” He suddenly hummed, his nose very close to touching yours but before he could get the chance you took a large step back and knocked your hip into your desk.

If it wasn’t for you holding everything in and trying not to whimper by the sudden foolish action you pointed at him in warning and felt how you were losing your breath.

“Please, for god sake just leave me!” You didn’t yell but neither was your tone above a whisper. It had all the seriousness it needed to show how tired you were of his behavior and if he tried to take one step again you would slap him in the face.

“Please just leave me alone.”

He was smiling once again almost as if it was a challenge but regardless respected your words. He took a few steps back but not before being his typical self and winking down at the Victoria’s Secret bag.

“Tell me if it’s the right size.”

Part 5

[sparklyeaglepoetry-blog]

Is car insurance expensive?

"Is car insurance expensive?

Im about to get my driver licence and my mom told me that car insurance is really expensive and that's the reason why she wont buy me a car.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://saleinsurancequotes.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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Me and my friend writes for the school news paper. We did our own investigation like the local news will do sometimes.We both at two different times went to see a local and same agent for a car insurance quote . We are both the same age, No record of bad driving, No criminal record, also wanted insurance on the same car and same gender. The only different variable was race. I don't think time would of played part since it was only 1 hour apart. This offends me how the car companies can do this. I wondered why? Any information or missing links that can help us write this story?""

Good student discount for car insurance?

so...i just completed my first year of college, and quite frankly i finished up poorly. my GPA is like a little over 2.4-2.5 and my dad is asking if i'll be able to send my transcript to the insurance (my dad is unaware of my grades). no chance of getting some discount or any at all??...i've kept my grades from my dad for quite some time, and now this is totally gonna blow my cover. i'm screwed aren't i? i'm a full time student and the insurance company is american family. so i guess my question is, do they discount % based on intervals of GPA, or is there just a minimum requirement and it's either you get a discount or not?""

Insurance cost for drivers under 21?

For Car and Motorcycle. Don't need exact numbers, just a rough estimate.""

What does estate mean in life insurance?

if someone has life insurance and does not have his/her spouse as the benificiary but has estate as the benificiary what does this mean?

Massachusetts Health insurance?

I am in fifties and currently living in California. Due to the California high cost of medical insurance, My wife and I are thinking of moving to Massachusetts state, get a small home there and retire there eventually. The reason that we are thinking about is that we overheard Massachusetts have a much lower health insurance cost ($50/month ?). Please advise us if you are currently living in Massachusetts state or other states that have less expensive health care insurance and housing cost. You advise is greatly appreciated. Jo""

Will i be double paying for house insurance?

I have had a 3 year personal loan on my house with a balloon payment on the end, and i am Re-financing the house to include my taxes/insurance with a conventional 30 year note. I have already paid my 2010 property Tax, and my 2011 house insurance is due March 21st. I am going to the bank today, will i actually have to pay my insurance come March 21st or is that something the bank does?""

The major difference between an owners title insurance policy and a lenders title insurance policy is?

The major difference between an owners title insurance policy and a lenders title insurance policy is?

What car insurance company has the best rates and prices?

i just bought a car and dont know which insurance company to choose

Car insurance changes?

hi i have had my insurance since august and i have decided to buy another car and change it over, but as the insurance may be cheaper elsewhere than staying with my current insurer, if i cancel am i liable to incur costs? if they quote me more than another insurance company obviously i will go with the cheaper. i pay monthly not in whole.""

Should my car insurance go up this high after an accident?

I got into an accident where I hit someone s bumper in a parking lot. I reported to my insurance company and they took care of it with $750. I was 100% at fault, and expected my renewal to go up, but when it came out, it was $800, which is 100% more than my usual insurance of $400 Does it suppose to go up 100%??!!! And this price will stay on for 6 years!!! That means by the end, I would end up paying $1800 more just to the company!! $1000 more than what I would've paid the guy!! This does not make sense to me whatsoever, first I thought the renewal was just for one year, it will go down bit by bit, but second year is still the same price! I am only a G2 driver who been driving for 3-4 years on PEI in Canada, can that be the reason? Still, $1800 extra?? Plz help me and thank you!""

What is the best and cheapest insurance for a 16 year old getting a 2006 scion tc?

What is the best and cheapest insurance for a 16 year old getting a 2006 scion tc?

Will my health insurance pay for my surgery?

I hurt my back one month ago and had no insurance. I am now employed with insurance and need back surgery. Will the insurance company call this a pre existing condition and not pay? Is there anything I can do to avoid the fight?

What is the average cost for health insurance a month?

I need to know the cost for health, and dental insurance a month.""

Is there a good site to compare the insurance rates of different cars?

I'm looking at cars for my son (who just turned 16) and would like to see which cars are best in terms of insurance rates without going through the process of getting a quote for each car.

How much would motorcycle insurance on a yamaha r6 in nj be?

Idk how old I'll be when I get one, can I get an answer for ages 18 and 21 please? thanks!""

Can my dad by a motorcycle and put it under his insurance for me to drive?

ok im conused about this whole thing i know for a 16 year old motorcycle insurance is crazy. So how would this work my dads been driving all his life(Harley-Davidson) and his insurance is cheap, now for me its gonna be alot of money so can he buy the bike and put it under his name then i just drive it so then it wont be so much $ on me? can this work or is that illegal for me to be driving someone elses bike? is there anyway like i stated above to make my insurance cheaper if this doesnt work?""

Will I affect car insurance rates ring on the cars title?

Me and my fiance re buying a car together I asked him to put it in both our names but he said nothing against me he just don't want his insurance to go up but I was told I don't have to affect the insurance even if the title says (him and me) the insurance would still just Be in his name.?

Insurance for a 16 yo?

im 16 and i am looking for a project car. the car i want is a 1971 dodge charger and it will take me a year or two to finish but i was wondering how much insurance would be if i got it and it was all finished and I was on my moms insurance?

Cheap Car Insurance for International Drivers License holder in the UK?

please i was told i could use my IDL here for a year. but to be able to drive my auntie's car i would have to get car insurance. i just need it for a couple of weeks. so please if anyone knows how i can obtain one please let me know thank you

Please tell me what you think about Infinity Auto Insurance?

Please tell me what you think about Infinity Auto Insurance?

""How much would the cost of a 2003 lincoln ls front bumper be, and where can I find a bumper?

2003 silver Lincoln LS. Only reliability insurance on the car.

Cancel my car insurance?

My car is sitting at a farm on blocks. but l am still paying insurance on it. It's only liability. The car doesn't run. Should l just let it get canceled by not making a payment? don't know when it will be on the road again. perplexed

Would Obama charge the military for Health Care?

So I see all this Healthcare debate going on, But what does that mean for the Military? I know its gonna cause the operating budget to be cut of course. But would we have to start ...show more""

Is car insurance expensive?

Im about to get my driver licence and my mom told me that car insurance is really expensive and that's the reason why she wont buy me a car.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/car-insurance-young-female-drivers-lynn-wade/"

[flowerscoffeesunshine]

Hello friends! Today’s post is all about finding things that with help you make your dorm room more you and less like a prison cell. This past school year I was very blessed to be living in an apartment! It was still student housing, so it was on campus and I had four other roommates. The room that I was provided with was a little small, but it was just enough space for me. I really wanted to make my room more cozy and I put WAY more effort into decorating than I did my freshman year and sophomore year because I had my own room. Down below will be pictures of items that I bought in order to transform an ordinary dorm into my own aesthetically pleasing (to me at least) space. While beginning my dorm shopping I didn’t really have a color scheme until after I bought my bedding. Before that, I was just trying to find anything that looked really nice and easy to work with in regards to finding decor that would match or blended well together. I will try to provide the link for everything that I mention.

1. Bedding

 Here we have what everyone who watches dorm tours are most excited for, my bedding! This lovely comforter is from Target. While searching for a new comforter set, I wanted to make sure I could find something that wasn’t dark but also didn’t have really bright colors. This caught my eye because at first I thought it was a quilt set. I clicked on the image of this bedding set on the Target website and realized that it was actually a comforter! This set is perfect for me because although I wasn’t looking for any specific colors, the blue, yellow, and white mixed together really appealed to me. I bought regular white sheets that came with a pillowcase and then I added a faux fur white pillow that I got from…take a guess….Five Below! I know, crazy right?! I wasn’t even looking for pillows there, but I stumbled upon this one while running some errands and immediately bought it. I mean, why wouldn’t I? It was only $5!!

(similar) Comforter set

Sheets

(similar) Throw pillow

  2. Wall Decor

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I was really happy with my wall decor this year. To start off I’m OBSESSED with my tapestry. Tapestries are a really great way to decorate your room because they bring so much life and color to a bland space. The big ones are perfect if you prefer buying less decorations because they basically take up most, if not all, of the space on a wall. I’m a true supporter of buying tapestries on Amazon. Based on some reviews, I know some people are against buying tapestries from Amazon because you just never know what you’re going to get. Some people get tapestries with holes in them or they smell really weird, but this is my second tapestry that I’ve purchased and so far I’ve haven’t had any problems (knock on wood!). I’ve been eyeing this particular tapestry for months, before I finally bought it. I saw it so many times in the multiple dorm hauls that I watched throughout last summer. It’s so pretty and it matches so well with my bedding. This picture was taken the first week I moved in and since then I’ve changed the string lights that I had up. The ones that I currently have up are from Wal-Mart. I’ve always wanted lights in my dorm room but never actually put any up until this year. I’m so happy with the way that this turned out because I was nervous that the lights wouldn’t be long enough to stretch across the whole tapestry, but they did perfectly. The next item I have is a wax warmer. I’m pretty sure this can be considered a wall decor because it is on a the wall! At my school we are not allowed to have candles and although I did live in an apartment they were still not permitted. Last semester my roommate bought a wax warm and we loved it, so I decided to buy one this year. It works really well and its great because I get to choose from so many different scents. The next decor I have up is a dream catcher. This was actually a gift so I don’t have a link for this exact one but I will provide a link to similar dream catchers.

Throughout my first semester I took a painting class, so as the semester went on I decorated the rest of my walls with my paintings. This was so perfect because I didn’t really need to buy extra decor in order to complete my room! If you love painting I’d suggest painting some canvases and shower your walls your art. If you don’t enjoy painting then buying some artwork or even posters are fine too!

Wax Warmer

Tapestry

String Lights

Dream Catcher

  3) Misc. Decor

I did have other miscellaneous things around my room that I put out/up as decor, but I don’t have pictures of them. I had a window ledge that I was able to put things on. I put an oil diffuser that changes color up there, a small plant pot that I made, a candle holder that I also made, and a decorative sign. I also bought a huge mason jar and put faux sunflowers in it and two small faux succulents beside that jar. This window ledge was a savior for me during this past school year because I was able to decorate even more! I even put my bible and prayer journal up there and it just made that whole section look nice, nice, and overall cute.

    So there it is! Whether you’re living in a small freshman dorm or a nice and spacious apartment, there are so many ways to make your space comfortable, cute, and enjoyable. Honestly the way I decorated my room made me want to stay in there ALL THE TIME! It probably wasn’t good but I was happy haha! I know school is already out, but hopefully this post will give you some inspiration for your rooms at home or even for when you move back to school this Fall. If it does, make sure to let me know down in the comments how you will be decorating and what themes you have in mind for your room. God bless!

  Making Your Dorm Your Own Hello friends! Today's post is all about finding things that with help you make your dorm room more you and less like a prison cell.

[fishmongeringstudies]

twenty one: i keep waking up in rooms i don't recognize and then realizing that i am still dreaming. my therapist says this is a symptom of a dislocated knee. i have not gone running since march. everyone that i know is lying to me

when i was a kid my parents used to take us to the same restaurant for brunch every sunday. it was on the first floor of a shopping mall which had big panes of glass stitched together for a ceiling and consequently let in far more natural light than your average building, but the restaurant itself was dark. moody. the walls were black and so was all the upholstery. the coffee mugs the waitresses served you coffee in were so dark you couldn't tell how full they were unless you looked extra hard at them, which i rarely did. in most memories of this place i'm seven or eight and i only drink two things: lemon tea and milk. so i'm sitting there with my frosted plastic cup of lemon tea, methodically stirring in my syrup with a skinny metal spoon because they make their lemon tea from scratch here which means no sugar and lots of tea, and my parents are drinking from their big adult mugs, and my sister's picking apart the roasted tomato on my dad's plate, and life, well. life is simple. good.

i can't remember when we stopped going there but i know that by the time i was nine and traipsing around in the hallways of the chinese primary school my parents had transferred me to, it had closed down and been replaced with some other restaurant whose name and shape i can't recall. well before i turned sixteen that entire wing of the first floor was demolished and replaced with the monstrosity that is singapore's flagship muji store. the muji's still there today. it's got a retail area and a few showrooms showcasing lifestyle choices for the upper-middle class citizen and a cafe with a dining area marked out by eclectic hanging decor that looks like a hundred little wastepaper baskets made from twine tied together to form a spotty mural of sorts. i'm fond of the cafe. their desserts are on the expensive side but they're thoughtfully made and look pretty in pictures, prettier in person.

your childhood years are one of those things that gets shinier the further away you stand from it, like how a bad experience becomes bittersweet by necessity if you give it long enough or you'll be stuck carrying that baggage with you forever. looking back, for example, on spring, i am inclined to see the educational takeaways instead of the moments in which my brain shut off and was replaced with a vat of screaming kittens. in this way we propel ourselves forward with the wisdom of the past, scrounged together from moments of pain and deep embarrassment. in this way we find ways to stay alive.

this summer i have wound up in upperclassmen housing by some unfortunate trick of fate. my apartment suite has five bedrooms but only four of them are occupied; i live in the room at the end of the hallway. my flatmates live in the next three. it has been five days since i moved in and i am convinced all of them think that they are living with a cryptid constructed in the scp containment breach format and unsure how to let them know that they are correct without making it personal. last night i woke up after a brief period of dreaming to use the bathroom; while washing my hands in the sink one of my flatmates walked past in the hallway behind me. 'hey, it's you,' she said. 'i feel like i haven't seen you forever. i mean. i've seen you, but i haven't seen seen you, you feel me?' asleep on my feet and ready to crash facefirst into bed, i nodded. 'yes.' she stood there for a few seconds as if expecting me to say more, but i had a vending machine for a brain at the moment and couldn't find it in me to press any more buttons. i certainly could've tried. but i was tired.

when i got on campus in february i resolved to sign up for therapy sessions with the school's mental health services since i was paying an ungodly amount for 'health insurance' (not a thing in singapore, really; not necessary in most places except america, really) anyway and i might as well make use of some small part of the astronomical sum that had been deposited in the pockets of some old white people i would likely never meet in my life. i got as far as filling out the form embedded in the school website and opening the automated email i received a few days later asking me to list my free times each week. i forgot about the rest. we are therefore entering the summer of my twentieth year without a goddamn clue what the inside of my head looks like apart from the fact that it must be pretty cool in there. it has to be cool. if it isn't cool what's the point of holding onto any of it anyway? we live for the spice of life. like garlic powder. cumin. oyster sauce.

this morning i went to target to look for sugar. the dining hall here doesn't do any of its vegetables justice but their desserts are to die for, and i've found myself suffering from a mild withdrawal since i started scrambling eggs and boiling about five hundred grams of cauliflower a day for the sheer therapeutic effect of it and because i don't really know any better. the target near campus is located in a shopping mall and surrounded by miles of parking space on both ends. while walking back across that stretch of empty parking space, i came across a smear of orange on the pavement. it was an orange. or it had been. the rind had been ground into the gravely surface of the road by a repetitive smoothing action so that it looked less like a bit of roadkill and more like it had been there all along. i can't stop thinking about that orange. who the fuck drops an orange in the middle of a road? why didn't they pick it up?

i have been cursed with an idea. it came to me last night before i fell asleep and it has been sitting on my shoulder since then like the devil in the popular angel-and-devil writing device which all nine year olds are taught by their teachers in chinese class, whispering to me about how great things will be if i can teach myself the fundamentals of sound design in three days. unfortunately it is when one decides to start a war that they are forced to confront their contacts list and the vast, untraceable geography of its contents. i cannot tell you if anything will result from this. but i hope that it will.

back when i still talked to her i mentioned the idea of doing puzzles to soothe the mind once and she took to it with so much genuine enthusiasm (she was always enthusiastic. too enthusiastic. enthusiasm was the problem, and the lack of willingness to curtail it the thing that eventually nailed the coffin shut) that i went to target the next weekend and bought a set of four puzzles depicting various scenes from old disney films. over the last two weeks i have done each puzzle three times, save for the last one, in which mickey and minnie mouse waltz down a red carpet and the people on the sidelines cheer for them with champagne moustaches and glittering beads for eyes. i cannot decide if this is meaningful. i cannot see the point of summer. but i am trying.

i don't remember the name of that sunday brunch restaurant. i don't remember the names of a lot of places our parents brought us when we were children, but my sister has been on a nostalgia trip since april and sends me screenshots of old pc games we used to play together from time to time. ernie's adventures in space. timmy's sea adventures. barbie island princess. i open each image and feel something inside of me physically ache in response. it appears that despite my best efforts, i will never be seven years old again.

i'm not a huge fan of lemon tea anymore. i prefer water. how it cleanses the palate like a vacuum cleaner sucking up all the dust and grime in a musty room. it's hard to distinguish between the inside and the outside of a thing when both are the color of a blood-red sunset but we try our best, you know? we draw lines on the sidewalk with chalk and we say 'here is my side of the universe and here is yours'. we act diplomatic when inside we are drunk and slurring our words all over the bartender's white vest. and then, because there is nothing else to do on this planet, we keep on living.

06.10.21

[gilbertineonfr2]

Hacktivity 2017 Wrap-Up Day 2

Let’s go for more wrap-ups. The second day started smoothly with Haroon Meer’s keynote. There was only one track today, the second room being fully dedicated to hackerspaces. Harron is a renowned speaker and the title of his keynote was “Time to play ‘D’”. The intro was simple: Nothing new, no 0-day, he decided to start his keynote based on his previous talks, especially one from 2011: “Penetration testing considered harmful“. Things changed considerably from a hardware and software point of view but we are still facing the same security issues. Example: a today’s computer is based on multiple computers (think about the MacBook Pro and its touch bar which is based on the same hardware as the Apple watch). Generic security solutions fail and an AV can still be easily bypassed. He gave many good facts and advice. Instead of buying expensive appliances, use this money to hire skilled people. But usually, companies have a security issue and they fix it by deploying a solution that… introduces new issues. He insisted and gave examples of “Dirty Cheap Solutions”. With a few lines of Powershell, we can easily detect new accounts created in an Active Directory. Aaron gave another example with a service he created: canarytokens.org. You create files, URLs, DNS records that are linked an email address and, in case of breach or unexpected access, an alert is sent to you. Another one: regular people don’t use commands lines ‘uname’, ‘ifconfig’ or ‘whoami’. Create alerts to report when they are used!

The first regular talk was given by Tobias Schrödel: “Hacking drones and buying passwords in the Darknet“. What’s the relation between them? Nothing, Tobias just accepted to cover these two topics! The talk was very entertaining and Tobias is a very good speaker… The first part (drones) was made in a management style (with a tie) and the second one with a t-shirt, classic one. Why hacking drones? In Germany, like in many countries, the market for drones is growing quickly. Small models (more classified as “toys”) are using Wireless networks to be controlled and get the pictures from the camera. Those drones provide a SSID, DHCP and are managed via a web interface. So they can be compared to a flying router! There are different ways to take down a drone. The safest solution is to use eagles because they can drop out the drone out of the zone that must be secured. The attack he demonstrated was a simple de-auth attack. The second part of the talks focused on the black market. Not a lot of people already bought stuff on the Darknet (or they hide it) but they are nice webshops where you can buy passwords for many official shops like eBay, Zalando, Paypal, etc… But why a company should buy passwords on the Darkweb? A few years ago, Dropbox suffered from a mega leak with millions of passwords in the wild. That’s bad but even more when corporate email addresses are present in sensitive leaks like Ashley-Madison. In Germany, a big company found 10 email addresses in this leak. If employees are free in their private life, this could have a very huge impact in case of blackmailing: “Give us access to these internal documents or we make your wife/husband aware of your Ashley-Madison account. This is a way to protect its business.

Then, Adrian Vollmer presented “Attacking RDP with Seth – How to eavesdrop on poorly secured RDP connections“. Adrian explained in details how’s working the RDP protocols to authenticate users. In the past, he used Cain & Abel to attack RDP sessions but the tool is quite old and unmaintained (I’m still using it from time to time). So, he decided to write his own tool called Seth. It exploits a misconfiguration in many RDP services. RDP security is similar to SSL but not exactly the same. He explained how this can be abused do downgrade from Kerberos to RDP Security. In this case, a popup warning is displayed to the victim but it is always ignored.

After the morning coffee break, I expected a lot from this talk: “A heaven for Hackers: Breaking Log/SIEM Products” by Mehmet Ince. The talk was not based on ways to abuse a SIEM via the logs that it processed but based on the fact that a SIEM is an application integrating multiple components. The methodology he used was:

Read the documentation

Understand the features

Get a trial version

Break it to access console

Define attack vector(s)

Find a vulnerability

He reported three cases. The first one was AlienVault. They downloaded two versions (the latest one and the previous one) and make a big diff in the files. Based on this, three problems were found: object injection, authentication bypass and IP spooking through XFF. By putting the three together, they were able to get a SQL injection but RCE is always better. They successfully achieved this by created a rule on the application that triggered a command when an SSH denied connection was reported. Evil! The second case targeted ManagEngine. The product design was bad and password to connect to remote Windows systems were stored in a database. If was possible to get access to a console to perform SQL queries but the console obfuscated passwords. By renaming the field ‘password’ to ‘somethingelse’, passwords were displayed in clear text! (“SELECT password AS somethingelse FROM …”). In the third case, LogSign, it was more destructive: it was possible to get rid of the logs… so simple! This was a nice talk.

Then, Ben Seri & Gregory Vishnepolsky presented “BlueBorne Explained: Exploiting Android devices over the air“. This vulnerability was in the news recently and is quite important:

5.3B devices vulnerable in the wild

8 vulnerabilities,  4 critical

Multiple OS: Android, Linux, Windows, IOS

No user interaction or auth

Enables RCE, MitM and info leaks

They reviewed the basic of the Bluetooth protocol and the different services (like SDP – “Service Discovery Protocol”). They gave a huge amount of details… The finished with a live demo by compromising an Android phone via the BNEP service (“BT Network Authentication Protocol). Difficult to follow for me but a huge research!

After a lunch break and interesting discussions, back to the main theatre for the last set of talks. There were two presentations that I found less interesting (IMHO). Anto Joseph presented “Bug hunting using symbolic virtual machines“. Symbolic execution + fuzzing a winning combination to find vulnerabilities. Symbolic execution is a way to analyse the behaviour of a program to determine what inputs cause each part of a program to execute. The tool used by Anto was klee. He made a lot of demos to explain how the tool is working. It looks to be a great tool but it was difficult to follow for my poor brain.

The next talk started late due to a video issue with the speaker’s laptop. Dmitry Yudin presented ” PeopleSoft: HACK THE Planet^W university“. By university, we mean here the PeopleSoft Campus Solutions which is used in more than 1000 universities worldwide. The main components are a browser, a web server, an application, a batch server and a database. Multiple vulnerabilities have been found in this suite, Dmitry explained the CVE-2017-10366. He explained all the step to jump from one service to another until a complete compromise of the suite.

After the last break, the day finished with two interesting presentations. Kirils Solovjovs presented “Tools for effortless reverse engineering of MikroTik routers“. Mikrotik routers are used worldwide and can be considered as a nice target. They are based on Linux, but RouterOS is based on an old kernel from 2012 and is closed source. So, we need a jailbreak! Kirils explained two techniques to jailbreak the router. He also found a nice backdoor which requires a specific file to be created on the file system. He explained many features of RouterOS and also some security issues like in the backup process. It is possible to create a file containing ‘../../../../’, so it was possible to create the file required by the back door. He released on the tools here.

To cloture the day and the conference, Gábor Szappanos talked about “Office Exploit Builders“. Why? Because Office documents remain the main vector of infection to drop malwares. It’s important to have “good” tools to generate malicious documents but who’s writing them?  Usually, VBA macros are used but, with a modern version of Office, macros are disabled by default. It’s better to use an exploit. Based on a study conducted two years ago, APT groups lack of knowledge to build malicious documents so they need tools! Gábor reviewed three tools:

AKBuilder: Active since 2015, typically used by Nigerians scammers and cost ~$500

Ancalog Exploit Builder: Peak of activity in 2016, also used by scammers. Price is ~$300 (retired)

Microsoft Word Intruder: used by more “high” profile, it can drop more dangerous pieces of malware. Written in PHP for Windows, its price is ~$20000-$35000!

A nice presentation to close the day! So, this closes the two days of Hacktivity 2017, the first edition for me. Note that the presentations will be available on the website in the coming days!

[The post Hacktivity 2017 Wrap-Up Day 2 has been first published on /dev/random]

from Xavier

[ronaldmrashid]

Financial Samurai Mid-Year 2017 Investment Review

To eliminate financial distortion, make sure I’m within my risk tolerance band, and push myself to continuously reinvest cash flow in order to survive permanent unemployment, every quarter I’ll be reviewing my investments. I’ve found that after even just a couple months, if I don’t write things down, I simply cannot remember how much and what I invested in.

For the past five years, my goal has been to earn a conservative 4% – 6% yearly return on my overall net worth given I reached my target number. It felt so amazing to escape the rat race in 2012, I was comfortable with what I had. Now, however, thanks to hedonic adaption, I’ve become used to the freedom and have turned greedier with my desired returns.

Today I’m shooting for a 10% yearly return based on my following new money investment allocation for 1H2017: 57.4% Real Estate Crowdfunding (10% target return), 11.27% Bonds (4% target return), 9.41% Stocks (10% target return), Venture Debt 3.3% (12% target return), 8.27% Mortgage (4.25% return), and Home Improvement 10% (20% return).

Let’s dig deeper into the numbers!

Financial Samurai Mid-Year 2017 Investment Review

April Investments

Stocks: Purchased $10,000 of Netflix at $141/share after 1Q results. At the time it felt a little painful to purchase since my original position was at $92/share. But I loved their portfolio of original content despite their massive cash hemorrhaging. Their business is sticky and inelastic. They can easily raise prices by 20% a month and lose less than 20% of their customer base to increase revenue. Reed Hastings, the founder, spoke at my 2006 Berkeley-Haas MBA commencement. Wish I had put my life savings in the name at the time!

Mortgage: Paid down $3,000 of my 4.25% Lake Tahoe vacation property mortgage. My goal is to pay random small amounts each month so that I feel no pain paying down my worst investment ever. If I see a Bank of America branch on my way back from lunch, I may swing by and pay down whatever is in my wallet. The goal is to pay the $346,000 mortgage off by June 15, 2022.

Real Estate Crowdfunding: I invested $250,000 in the RealtyShares fund in January 2017. Instead of inputting the entire $250,000 in January, I spread it out over a six month period. It’s really just accounting as I didn’t know exactly how quickly they’d be able to invest in the 10+ deals they have in their mandate.

In April, the fund made a $600,000 investment in the acquisition and renovation of College Town Tucson, an 88-unit, 247-bed student housing apartment complex several blocks from the main campus of the University of Arizona in Tucson, AZ. Constructed in 1972 and partially renovated in 2006 and 2013, the Property consists of a mix of two, three and four-bedroom units and includes amenities such as a clubhouse, fitness center, swimming pool and property-wide Wi-Fi.

I’ve always wanted to gain exposure to an apartment complex in a college town due to the consistent high demand. I just never wanted to physically own and manage such a property due to the frequent turnover. Can you imagine what a PITA is to be a landlord of a student housing complex?

I can imagine all the parties in the hot tub now. IRR target: 16.5%. 5-year hold. $20K minimum investment. Reminds me of a scene from Breaking Bad.

Home Improvement: After my landscaper finished my backyard, I asked him to landscape my side yards and front yard. I was extremely pleased with his workmanship and his price. As a result, I referred him to a friend who hired him to do ~$25,000 of work. I’m now 100% done with my home remodeling/expansion projects for the fixer which I bought in early 2014. It was a long journey due to the complexities of the inspection system and the idiosyncrasies of each contractor.

May Investments

Bonds: Invested $26,600 in two, 20-year maturity, California municipal bonds with a yield to worst of 3.8%. Based on my estimated 32% effective tax rate (federal and state), the gross yield is therefore 5.5%. Instead of putting more into bond funds, like I did between November 2016 – January 2017, I decided to focus more on individual bonds so that I know I’ll get par value ($100/share) back upon maturity plus the coupon payments for all those years.

Many bond funds have rallied back to pre-election levels, so I felt hesitant allocating more money. If you add 1.5% for the 6-month yield to the principal appreciation so far, we’re talking a pretty healthy ~6% total rate of return.

Related: The Case For Buying Bonds

Municipal bond returns YTD are not bad once you include the coupon payment

Mortgage: Paid down another $5,000 of my 4.25% Lake Tahoe vacation property mortgage. I decided to rationally no longer pay down my 2.375% rental home mortgage and my 2.5% primary home mortgage until the Lake Tahoe vacation property mortgage is paid off.

Real Estate Crowdfunding: The RealtyShares fund made a $700,000 common equity investment in the Virginia Crossing Hotel and Conference Center, a full-service hotel located in Glen Allen, Virginia.

Opened in 2001, the Hotel comprises three colonial-style buildings with guest amenities, including 2 full-service restaurants, an outdoor swimming pool, fitness center, 24 conference rooms and a 4,700 SF ballroom. The Hotel is located adjacent to The Crossings Golf Club, one of the greater Richmond area’s premier semi-private courses, and is strategically located at the convergence of Interstates 95 and 295.

I’m very excited about this acquisition and repositioning because there’s a special place in my heart for southern Virginia since I went to school 40 minutes south of this hotel at The College of William & Mary. I love colonial style buildings and would happily retire in Williamsburg for three months of the year if I wasn’t living on the west coast.

Home improvement: I decided to fulfill my dream of getting a hot tub for $15,825 now that the back yard is done. The whole process took nine months since I first visited the show room. Since installation, I’ve averaged about five hours a week in the hot tub. The maintenance is easier than expected. What is kind of scary is how much home improvement costs add up. I can see how a homeowner can spend an endless amount of money upgrading their home if they don’t set a limit. I’ll be putting together a home remodeling guide in the future.

June Investments

Venture Debt: I received a capital call of $3,001 for my second venture debt fund investment. For these types of funds, you commit a certain amount of money, and the fund will call a percentage of your commitment over a certain period of time, usually within two years. The first venture debt fund I invested in almost three years ago is looking like it will return 13% a year net of fees because they’ve almost returned all the capital. As a result, I’m considering investing more capital into the second fund now that the guys have even more experience and a larger fund to spread out the expenses.

Mortgage: I was paralyzed with what to do in June since bonds and stocks did well, so I decided to pay down $22,000 more of 4.25% mortgage debt. When in doubt, pay down debt.

Related: Debt Optimization Framework For Financial Independence

Real Estate Crowdfunding: The RealtyShares fund approved a $775,000 JV equity investment in the Sheraton Dallas Forth Worth Airport Hotel, a 302-key full-service hotel located in Irving, Texas. DFW International Airport is ranked the 4th busiest airport in the US, and the DFW region is booming. The Hotel is approximately 15 miles northwest of downtown Dallas, one the region’s largest employment centers.

I’m bullish on the heartland of America. The fund had already made an Austin, Texas multi-family residential property investment in December 2016, and I was hoping they’d continue to invest more in Texas. The Dallas area has one of the most robust income growth trends in the nation.

Capital Commitment Review

$272,426 of new capital was put to work in 2Q, which equates to $90,808 a month on average. This figure surpasses my goal of $30,000 – $50,000 a month, but it’s due to arbitrarily spreading out my original $250,000 RealtyShares investment across six months.

If I take out the entire $250,000 real estate crowdfunding investment, I ended up investing $32,333 a month on average. With a baby on the way, I knew I wouldn’t have as much time to focus on my investments this quarter. Hence, I knew that if I invested in nothing else, I would average $41,667 a month for six months ($250,000 / 6 months).

When income generation is good, it’s important to stay disciplined and maximize your investments in order to prevent lifestyle inflation. Pay yourself AND your investments first! When difficult times inevitably come, your investments will hopefully carry you through until the next bull run.

Pro Forma Performance Analysis

I’ve allocated capital to achieve a potential 10% objective return based on my risk tolerance (green). Of the $435,571 in 1H invested capital, I’m looking to return roughly $42,744 based on my base case objective.

I’ve also included my current estimated returns, which comes out to about 15% (blue). The only thing that looks aggressive is a 50% return on Home Improvement. But the 50% return could be conservative because competing landscaping bids were 100% – 150% higher since my guy did the job as a side hustle for cash. For example, one competing landscaper quoted me $50,000 to do my front yard, and my guy did it for $17,000, including materials. Further, it’s a bull market on the west side of SF. Remodeled houses are going for tremendous premiums.

Although the RealtyShares fund has a 15% target IRR over five years, and all three investments in 2Q2017 have target IRRs greater than 15%, I’m keeping the current estimated return at 10%. All the deals are equity deals, so it’s good to stay conservative until there are exits.

Bonds have done very well as you saw in the chart above, and my stock returns have been solid due to investments in Amazon in 1Q and Netflix in early 2Q. Due to valuations, I still can’t get excited about putting a large allocation into stocks, so I’ll just wait for a pull back if one ever comes to invest a more meaningful amount of capital. At least I didn’t short the market!

Going forward, my Home Improvement weighting will decline, but my Real Estate Crowdfunding, Bonds, and Venture Debt weightings will increase. The total return target will still be 10% a year.

My biggest financial fear is not a bear market, but a precipitous decline in income. I feel like a young man again because contributions are currently far surpassing returns. I also want to have enough fire power to invest during a downturn. Therefore, despite the constant sleep deprivation of being a new father, I promise to keep slicing away. After all, a 50% increase in family size warrants a 50% higher wealth target right? Let’s rock.

Related: Ranking The Best Passive Income Investments

Readers, what type of investments did you make in 2Q2017? How are you feeling about the current investing environment environment? Any risks you see from my 2Q2017 asset allocation? Where can everything go wrong? I will might put together a mid-year passive income report as well.

Graphic by https://ckongsavage.com/

from http://www.financialsamurai.com/financial-samurai-2q2017-investment-review/

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Environment Club (Reflection)

1st day:

I was quiet reluctant to join the environment club at first because I thought that there would be barely anyone there but I was wrong. There was a large turnout but unfortunately most of them didn’t want to be in club after the first day, so quiet a few people left but the others managed to stay. The first day consisted with enrolling and getting attendance done for everyone that was there, then the leaders of the club conducted a small presentation to show us some of the fun, yet helpful things we’ve be doing all year long. There was a point where some people that left later were being very disrespectful towards the whole concept of the club which was very a harsh site to see, since the environment is where we live and it’s our civic duty to protect and serve it.

2nd Day:

I told a few of my friends about the club and they were really excited by all the things we were going to do so they joined the next week. During the introduction period of last week’s meet up, the leaders told us that they intended to do a beach clean-up, a bottle collection- for starting a garden or making plastic sculptures and raising funds to help rescue a dolphin. So today we categorized our long term goals and short term goals. Our long term goals were raising funds, collecting bottles for sculptures and conduct a beach clean-up. Our short term goals were to promote and encourage other students not to litter and also create a more eco-friendly environment. The turnout was really good compared to how we were treated at first which was really nice to see, although there were a few people still unsure whether to stay or leave.

3rd Day:

Today we had discussed about having a bake sale, to start with fund raising for adopting a dolphin. We were separated into 3 groups: drinks, desert and food. Each group would have to decide what they planned to make or buy and report back to the leader. Our target fund raising goal was 150 dollars, for us to adopt a dolphin. The bake sale was going to be conducted during both breaks in school.

4th Day- Bake-Sale:

We had set up tables in front of T-block so that everyone knew about the sale, the day before we also announced it in homeroom. One of our members made a poster for the bake-sale using used paper. For the bake sale, I contributed by baking vegan cupcakes with blue frosting and a small sign on each cupcake which read “For Winter”. You see, Winter was one of the dolphins that the Clearwater Marine Aquarium had first rescued so I thought, it would be a good idea to bring awareness of the organization and the work they were doing.

We had a variety of food items of people to purchase to help towards the cause. At the end of the day we made double the amount of money, we aimed to make, which was amazing all the money we required to adopt a dolphin and a bit more. I never contributed to a big bake sale before which was a first so the experience was fun, since on one hand you’d be doing the math of giving the customer their change back and on the other hand you’d be trying to call in more people to buy. While the sale took place, I went around the tables to make sure everyone was doing alright and I was told that people were just coming up to the tables and taking the drink without paying, which was really hard to hear so I stuck around that area to make sure it didn’t happen again.

We saved up all the soda bottles so we could recycle them for later and use them for our other plans.

5th Day-Sports Day:

On sports day, we had just a drinks sale, since there was no one selling refreshments we decided to take that opportunity to raise more fund for starting a garden in our school. We set up a recycle bin so that everyone could throw their water bottles in it and so we could collect all the soda bottles we purchased, then we could use them for our bottle based projects. During sports day all the students were on the field sitting in their house tents so a few of us decided to go to each tent to take orders since the students weren’t able to leave their station and come to us. We had a little hiccup, we had a soda shortage and the super market didn’t open till ten, so we had to keep some people waiting for their mojito and the drinks started getting warm and we didn’t have any way to refrigerate them but people still bought and we sold out.

After we cleaned up, I and two other students had borrowed a large plastic bag and had gone through the recycle bin which we set up, people threw trash that was no plastic based but we still persevered and wore plastic gloves and dug through the trash to collect the bottles. A few of the members were on the field collecting bottles to recycle too.

6th Day:

We conducted a trash session, were we would split up into two groups and have one member from each group go around the school and count the number of trash cans. Then we would have to make a map of the school and place the positions of each trash can and decide ourselves where we’d reposition the trash cans more effectively. During the process we all realised that our school needed more trash cans since 9 were too little for such a large campus. We also discussed ways we could get people to stop littering, I suggested we paint a yellow path like a yellow brick road to all the trash cans so that people’s attention would be caught and then would follow the yellow path to a trash can to throw their trash. The idea didn’t pull through since it was made apparent that once people knew that the yellow path they would stop following it and it may not even encourage the use of trash cans. Some else suggested attaching small trash cans on the side of the tables so that people could through their trash in a bin but our Club Teacher pointed out that, we shouldn’t made it easy for them, instead make them willingly get up and through their trash in a bin. We did have a suggestion of making our own recycled trash bins just for water bottles, which we’d make with recycled bottles and we all agreed to it.

7th Day:

Made plans for the upcoming year since January would be environment month so we decided to have a variety of things to do in school. We decided that we could sell DIY things, created by us, hold a movie screening of Wall-E and create posters for environment month. I also proposed that we could visit the local animal shelter, Every Little Thing, as a field trip and the club was pro going since it would be a chance to try and help the shelter and everybody was really excited to see a bunch of animals and play with them. One of the leaders, also talked about how when we’d go how we’d have to conduct ourselves because most of animals had been badly abused.

8th Day:

We decided before hand to bring paints and brushes so we could start making the recycle bins for further bottle collection. Our bins were made out of 20 liter water bottles which we collected from the school canteen. We spilt into groups, cut up the bottles and then painted each bin differently. We were unable to finish so we felt our bins to dry in the back of the lab and we cleaned up. During that time, I was going to get the field trip forms printed so I could distribute the forms before everyone had to leave.

9th Day - Animal Shelter Field Trip:

We rode to Oyster Bay in the school bus on Saturday with the every little things ib1 group. We reached there and we got off the bus in groups of 4, to not startle the dogs. In our groups, we were taken to different parts of the shelter to see all the animals, we first went to feed the turtles, then to the puppy kennel, then the cat sanctuary and finally we went to see the goats. It was a such a heartwarming experience to see the animals so happy but it really took a poll on me to see how badly hurt some of the dogs were, one of them had half a leg and another had his skull visible, which was all hard to take in.

10th Day:

It was the first meeting of the new term and as my new leadership position and it was a great first day, since the old members that stayed were over joyed and the new members were ready to work and contribute to the club. The first thing we did was a small introduction of ourselves and then we discuss the activities that everyone would like to do during this terms environment club. Both the old and new members had put in their ideas and then I made a planner for when we will conduct these activities. Since we had time, I decided that the bottles we had collected last term were dirty from the dumpster so we all washed and sorted the bottles into two piles, small and big bottles. Everyone was completely on board with helping out which was amazing to see how passionate they were and enthusiastic. I was really happy to see the large turn out and how they were all ready to make a difference.

11th Day:

Today, we made recycled bins out of big 20 litre bottles, to collect more bottles for recycling. We had 4 new big bottles, so everyone was split into their own groups and were given a bottle each, some completed their unfinished bins of last year. It was a very productive session, there were a lot of creative ideas and group of other girls worked on a Wall-E poster which was made by recycled wood, for a promotion of another environment club activity to raise money to start a garden. We also got two members that joined today.

12TH Day:

This Friday during clubs, we finished off our recycled dustbins. It was the first day of the new leader of environment club, so I caught her up on what we had been doing yesterday, since she’s an art student, she assisted the kids which using spray paints to cover some of our bins and help a lot of kids to execute their ideas properly. It was an extremely productive environment club meeting this week. All the kids were having a really good time, we also collect a lot of bottles during the week so we sorted and counted all of them and separated large and small bottles and also the bottle caps. We made a custom special bin for just recycling bottle tops. Last 15 minutes of clubs, I called out for a 15 minute clean up time and announced the activity we would do next week which would be poster making for environment month awareness.

13TH Day:

We were celebrating Valentine’s Day in school today so everyone was excited and pumped! Everyone had to group up to make awareness posters for Environmental Awareness Week which is the week to come. During clubs, I also had discussed with some of the senior members on making a presentation to show throughout the week. We also planned previous to hold a movie screening of the Lorax and to sell tickets, to fund raise to start a school wall garden.

14th day:

All throughout the week we were selling tickets for our movie screening to fund raise money for a school wall garden. The day of the movie we had arranged for soda and popcorn. The screening went smoothly, we had a large turnout although we ran out of popcorn and had to substitute with crisps. We made a large sum of money which we couldn’t wait to use to start up the garden.

15th day:

As a reward for all the hard work and effort we had all put into last week we planned to watch the movie for ourselves but unfortunately we were moved to another Lab which didn’t have a functioning projector. Instead we discussed on how we would execute the wall garden, the things we’d need, who’d be able to get them and where we could get them. We also had a student and member to the club, so we spent the little time remaining getting to know her and explain what our club was all about.

16th day:

We wanted to help out around the school this week so we decided to group up and go around the school keeping up trash and throwing it away. We spent not a lot of time doing this since the school has decreased greatly in pollution which was great news for us! It meant our message was getting through! We then spent the remaining time measuring the potential wall we’d like to use and deciding on the flowers we would get for the garden.

17th day:

This Friday, Gurmeher had led the activity send planned to make things out of old clothes, paper, anything that could be recycled to something else. We had shown a few video of people who found uses for other things and living a zero waste life. It was really fun some kids made posters out of old paper, some made pencil holders decorated with old cloth and someone made a cute coin purse! The activity was to show everyone how we can reuse old materials and give them another use.

18th day & 19th day:

We wanted to give our own members a chance to watch Wall-E, we spend two days watching the movie and then we’d use inspiration from the movie to create a long, collaborative mural, in which everyone would work on together.

20th day:

Today, we had split up into three groups to work on the mural. Once, we were in our groups we came up with our concepts for what we’d like to do for our part of the mural. After having discussions with each group, I and Gurmeher had got old used chart paper and started to assemble and join them to make a long sheet of paper, with the help of everyone.

21st day & 22nd day:

We had begun with drawing out our ideas and then started execution. Some colored, others painted and some used old paper to make designs for their section. We had faced difficulties with the chart paper cutting apart because of how old it was and not able to absorb as much paint, so we tried to patch it up by using glue and paper. When the same thing happened again we used duct tape to hold the cuts together. This was the last meeting since exams were starting next week, so I had informed them that we did get approval for the wall garden but since the academic year is coming to an end, we’d be continuing the next academic year with this initiative.

I noticed the great increase in people who were becoming self-aware of how important it is the reduce waste and take care of our surroundings. I feel like this club was one of the best experiences I’ve had since I made sure everyone was involved and participating and for everyone’s opinion to be taken into consideration, I built a really strong bond with all the students in the club. I think this activity is extremely useful and important, and a learning mile stone, since you learn how to work with others, you learn how lead a group of dedicated people and you make new friends from all grades, which shows that age should not restrict us from making friends within a certain age group. I feel like this activity was not only fun and a bit stressful for me but it, also, promoted a good message which we were working towards and having fun.

This activity was my number one priority, because I deeply believe in the better mention of the world we live in, so to work with others with the same goals as I have meant greatly to me, because a lot of people are ignorant to issues with the environment and it was amazing leading a group of enthusiastic, environmentalists. This activity has a lot of value in the sense it opens up more people to become more involved with protecting the environment. I learnt that if a group of people set their minds to something and work hard towards their goal they will achieve it and this is definitely something I can apply to my life since I had experience a lot if difficulties with trying to get approval to adopt a dolphin and the with the transaction but I worked and worked until I made it happen with the support of the club members