#i blame this on it being aries season

[moondust-bard]

Might start a secret sideblog onto which I can release all of my unhinged nonsense. I’ve gotten way too comfortable here, subjecting you innocent, darling writeblrs to my crazed gremlin ramblings

[waterbearable]

like. i don’t even think it’s better necessarily, but if the only person with actual buy-in on the hunt aside from lottie was van (i don’t really buy tai as having committed here, she’s just going along w van which i think does repeat old patterns), then why not just to subdue lottie from the start? like i GUESS it’s some attempt to suggest groupthink but as soon as lottie starts trying to pursue shauna why would you make it seem like you’re also trying to get her? like i could see at least a couple of them trying to subdue lottie, lottie+van trying to fight them off, chaos/giving into the violence ensues. idk it just does not work for me and the outcome...ehhh

(more in the tags srry but for my non-yj folks cw for mentions of ideation, overdose, addiction)

[blurredcolour]

If You'll Be My Bodyguard | Part Seven

If You'll Be My Bodyguard, I Can Be Your Long Lost Pal Masterlist

Summary: Circumstances beyond your control separate you from Austin and leave him vulnerable to attack. The outcome not only results in injury to him and Ari, but a realization of just what you and Austin mean to one another.

Pairing: Austin Butler x Female Bodyguard Reader

Warnings: Language, Mentions of Firearms, Austin Butler Does Not Win the Oscar - Just Like Real Life, Mentions of Reader’s Mother Being Attacked, Mentions of Reader’s Mother Being Injured, Discussion of Parental Mortality, Discussion of Automobile Accident, Discussion of Attempted Homicide With An Automobile, Austin Butler Injury, OC Male Character Injury, Austin Butler Hospitalization, Austin Butler Pain, Austin Butler Recovery, Reader Acting As Caregiver, Home Invasion, Attempted Shooting, Dog Bite to Intruder, Shots Fired, Minor Reader Injury, Allusions to Handcuff Kink, Mature/Explicit Themes [manual stimulation – m/f receiving, oral – m/f receiving, face sitting, sex while injured, multiple orgasms, condom, penetrative sex] – 18+ Only.

Credit: Mark Seliger

Author’s Note: And so we’ve reached the final chapter! Honestly, it is actually two chapters worth of material but I didn’t feel like adding another part of making y’all wait. So, strap in, there’s a lot to come!

Word Count: 8726

You were quite certain you had never seen someone lose more graciously. From desperately clinging to Angela Basset’s hands to surging to his feet to cheer on Brendan Fraser as he made his way to the stage, face wide with excitement for his fellow nominee and now Oscar winner. You were thankful to be standing beneath the shadow of the balcony box above as your heart fell through the floor and you were positive that you looked exactly as crestfallen as you felt.

Taking advantage of the time afforded by Brendan’s acceptance speech, and the Best Picture category, you managed to ruthlessly stomp down your disappointment and assemble your expression into a warm, kind, neutral mask before moving to join Austin once the broadcast came to an end. It took nearly an hour for him to make his way from the auditorium – there were simply that many people who wanted to snag a photo or offer their condolences. When you finally reached the doors, he looked to you and swallowed tightly.

“Let’s just go to Ysabel.” He murmured into your ear, and you nodded, sending Ari a message to meet you around the side, away from the press, to make a quick exit to the Warner Brother’s party.

While the Governor’s Ball would be lavish, with food and drink fit for royalty, it was undeniably biased towards celebrating the winners and you could hardly blame Austin for not wanting to go through that. Especially not when, waiting at the private party were people like Polly, Xavier, Kelvin, and Luke. As the car pulled up, you opened the door for him, looking up to his face as he held out a hand to help you in. You smiled softly and slid in carefully, moving across the backseat to the other side so he could climb in immediately after you. Though he did so chuckling and shaking his head.

“I coulda gone around, you know Betty.” He smirked softly and closed the door against the noise outside, leaning back against the seat as the silence of the car wrapped around the pair of you.

Ari carefully navigated his way to West Hollywood, and you politely watched the darkened streets flow past the window. The outcome of the evening was not sitting well with you. It felt like the wrong ending. Like the writer had made a terrible mistake and it just needed a brutal treatment by an editor. Unfortunately, real life did not work that way.

At the brush of his fingers against yours on the seat between you, you looked to him quickly, swallowing tightly as he took your hand and squeezed tightly.

“Thank you, Betty spaghetti, for helping me make it through the insanity of awards season. I’m sorry we’re not on the winning team tonight…” His voice waivered a bit and your fingers tightened around his. “But we’re on the living team and that’s in no small part to you…”

You shook your head, a touch violently, and took an unsteady breath as your heart clenched in sympathy.

“You have nothing to apologize for, Mr. Butler. What you have accomplished is truly extraordinary…d..did you hear them? Every time a presenter came on stage they referred to them as a nominee…you will forever be Academy Award Nominee Austin Butler. And not to mention Golden Globe Winner Austin Butler, and BAFTA winner Austin Butler, and Virtuoso Award Winner Austin Butler, and whatever Palm Springs gave you…” You trailed off and he gave you a laugh, with tear-filled eyes, as that definitely took some of the power out of your speech. “But regardless, this is just the start. Your opening act.” You nodded firmly and gasped as he pulled you into a crushing embrace, burying his face into the crook of your shoulder.

“Thank you, Betty…I really needed to hear that…” He whispered, voice fragile against your neck and you could feel the undeniable dampness of tears on your skin as you slid your arms around him tightly in return, holding him firmly for as long as he needed to be held.

“You’re welcome” You murmured softly into the expensive fabric of his tuxedo jacket, neither of you aware of the fact that Ari had parked around the corner from the restaurant a good five minutes ago until he politely cleared his throat.

“Sorry to interrupt but I believe a photographer may have spotted us.” He said quietly from the front seat and Austin quickly straightened, wiping at his face.

You pulled back with similar speed, tugging your dress into place before sliding out from the car to walk around the perimeter and open his door. Walking together, he entered the party to a hero’s welcome, which brought a small smile to his face.

Being swarmed by those who had seen firsthand what it had taken to achieve the artistry captured on film for eternity acted as a balm for Austin. You found the tension and concern leaving your own body a little as he relaxed and seemed to enjoy himself. And when Jerry Schilling showed up? Austin’s smile only grew. You had to chew on the inside of your cheek to keep from beaming as they huddled close on a bench in the courtyard, swapping stories and kind words. Austin’s instincts to come here had definitely been correct.

He ate a somewhat proper dinner and once buoyed by their love and support, made his way to you a little over an hour later.

“We should go meet the stylists at the house to get ready for the Vanity Fair party.”

You nodded quickly, having been eyeing the time and trying to wait as long as possible to allow him to soak in as much of their presence as he could.

“Ari is waiting exactly where we left him.”

While he went upstairs to change, you took advantage of the quiet moment to eat some dinner yourself, sitting at the island as you carefully enjoyed some leftovers with a tea towel draped over your chest. Biscuit was dozing at your feet, somewhat used to the odd hours of awards season, but still not entirely awake. The pair of you lifted your heads at the click of his heeled boots on the kitchen tile as he returned now dressed in a treacherously low-cut silk shirt and black suit. You were grateful that you remembered how to swallow the food in your mouth rather than letting it tumble out, slack-jawed. But only just.

“That still smells good, Betty, gimme a bite…” He leaned in and you carefully loaded a forkful before sliding it past his plush lips. You paid far too close attention to the way his perfectly straight, white teeth scraped the food from the metal fork tines before his lips seal shut as he began to chew.

He made the tiniest noise of pleasure and your eyes flicked up to watch his eyelids fall shut as he nodded with enthusiasm.

“We did a really good job on that one…” He smiled once he’d swallowed, squeezing your shoulder as he licked his lips. “I promise I won’t keep you out too late, you must be tired.”

You tugged the tea towel free of your body, not missing the way his eyes flit to the plunge of your dress. His height and your seated position surely giving him an eyeful before he yanked his gaze away forcefully. You slid from the stool to put your dishes in the dishwasher as goosebumps prickled in the wake of his stare.

“We are going to a party for you to have fun and celebrate the fact that this insanity is over. We will stay exactly as long as you would like.” You replied stubbornly and left Biscuit with dinner before leading him out to the car.

In the dark of the vehicle, you retrieved the tube of lipstick the makeup team had left you from your dress pocket and carefully reapplied some, trying to ignore the sensation that he was watching you.

In the ranking of afterparties, this was certainly the most press intense. There was also a rather breathless moment where Austin’s ex-girlfriend happened past him while he was in conversation with Sharon Stone. Mercifully, everyone did an excellent job of playing blind and after an assault of photography flash and shouted commands, you were inside the party.

There was mixing, mingling, drinking, and nibbling. Kate, Baz, Catherine and some of the Elvis cast also appeared. At one point Austin was pulled aside to have some photos taken by Mark Seliger. There was no shortage of toasts in his name, and when Brendan Fraser arrived he immediately sought Austin out to hug him close. Smiling fondly, you felt your phone begin to vibrate in your pocket and rolled your eyes playfully thinking Maddie was going on another tirade. Given the time, she really ought to be in bed.

You could barely contain your confusion when your father’s name displayed on the screen and felt a cold trickle of panic drip down your spine to settle in the pit of your stomach. Your father never called. Let alone in the middle of the night. You forcefully pushed the answer call button and lifted the phone to your ear, eyes casting about for somewhere quieter but also flicking back to Austin – torn between the urgency of this call and the importance of your duties.

“Hey dad, I…What’s up?” You found yourself half-shouting as you cupped the bottom of the phone to hopefully capture as much of your voice as possible.

Only select words were audible above the din of the crowd and the throb of the bass from the music.

“….mother….town….mugged….hospital….ok….”

Austin was making his way over to you excitedly talking about a private island in the Bahamas that someone had offered for him to relax upon as you felt all the blood drain from your face and extremities, the snippets of your father’s words making your hands clammy and shaky.

“Daddy, just wait I can’t…” You glanced around frantically now, vaguely registering the change in Austin’s countenance.

His arms wrapped around you, hands gripping your hips as he easily navigated through the crowd to lead you out onto the patio. He did not stop walking until he reached the very edge of the party and continued to shield your body from the curious glances of the other attendees you had passed, caging you against the fence as you could at last hear yourself think.

“I’m outside now, what happened?” You tried again, feeling yourself swaying a little on your feet as he relayed the full story of some local troubled youths who had decided to mug your mother and her friends on their monthly night at the theatre in town.

You clutched at the lapel of Austin’s jacket, desperate for some stability as the entire universe seemed to be off kilter.

“Your mother’s friend, Cynthia, well she fought back and it…didn’t end well. Everyone is…well they’re hurt but the hospital discharged them all same day, today…well tonight.” You could hear the exhaustion in his voice. “She’s just gone up to bed, told me not to call you but…”

You shook your head quickly and swallowed roughly, trying to find your voice.

“No, no thank you for calling me I…she’s really going to be ok?” You asked quietly, feeling all of six-years-old despite the fact that you were standing in a gown at the Vanity Fair Oscar’s After Party wrapped up in Austin Butler’s protective embrace. “I…tell her I love her ok, Dad? I’ll…I’ll talk to my boss…No I…Dad. Dad, I want to see you guys I…thank you for calling. Love you too. Bye.”

You let the phone drop from your ear but made no move to stand fully, rather preferring to hide against Austin’s chest and ignore the outside revelry for as long as possible. You leaned into him, the crown of your head settling against the hollow of his throat as his arms slid around you fully, supporting you more than you would care to admit as you tried to take steady breaths.

“Betty, I would like to give you time, I just need to know you’re not going to keel over on me here…” He murmured gently into your ear. You nodded quickly, rocking back on your heels and straightening so quickly he looked briefly startled before resuming a patient and supportive expression.

“Some little shits decided to jump my mom and her friends on their way home from a play tonight.” Your gaze was unfocused as you were picturing the faces of the known delinquents.

“Oh Betty…” His voice broke as he gripped your shoulders tightly to help steady you on your feet.

“My mom…she’s not like me, she’s a lady. She does lady things like get her nails done, and bake, and go to the spa and the theatre and…This is not how tonight was supposed to go. She was supposed to have fun with her friends watching some local people do a Tennessee Williams play and get a little tipsy and come home….and you were supposed to win because you deserve it so much. You put everything in that role, which was incredible by the way” you dropped the wall of professionalism for the first time, “and you’ve dragged your ass around in this dog and pony show, performing tricks for them for weeks only for them to give it to the other guy and now here you are putting on a brave face and watching me fall apart at an after party…” Your cheeks were wet and you’d started sniffling somewhere in the middle of your tirade against awards season, though you weren’t quite sure when.

“Oh, my darling Betty…sweet Betty spaghetti don’t waste your anger on this frivolity. We’ve spent months on this empty preening for golden statutes and here you are staring down the things that really matter and you’re spilling your priceless tears over me…” his hands cupped the sides of your head gently as his thumbs swiped at each traitorous tear that stole down your cheek. “Let’s get you home, ok?”

You gripped his wrists and looked up to him, brow furrowing.

“But I’m ruining your night…” You protested weakly as he shook his head.

“You’re reminding me of what really matters, come on.” He slid his arm around your shoulders protectively, guiding you back through the crowd of attendees.

You kept your head low, certain your makeup must be ruined, arranging for Ari to meet you at the side door. Austin helped you into the car and pulled out his own phone once you were settled.

“You find a way home, I’ll call Scott.”

You looked to him startled.

“Like…right now? I meant…I meant once you were on your vacation or something…”

“Now, Betty. You’re going home, home. Now.” He nodded firmly and dialed Scott before you could utter another word in protest.

Swallowing tightly, you pulled out your phone to make travel arrangements to get home as soon as possible. He went upstairs to change when you arrived back at his house, and you went into his office to pack but he found you fifteen minutes later, still standing in the doorway dressed in your gown, staring at your empty suitcase open on the bed.

“C’mere…” He said gently and pulled you close into the soft hoodie he now wore. “Facing the mortality of our parents is a truly foundation-shaking experience.” He murmured into your hair, and you nodded speechlessly.

He helped you fill your suitcase with some clothes and useful things, sending you to the washroom to change into something more practical for travel. You wiped the makeup from your face and blew your nose a few times before collecting your things.

“Are you sure about this, Austin? I could always delay…”

He cut you off with a shake of his head, gently pressing his lips to your cheek.

“I’ll be fine, you go take care of your family.”

In your fragile state, you had been easily seduced by his words of comfort. Fooled into believing that, despite all evidence to the contrary, he would be perfectly fine in your absence. That there wasn’t a psychologically unstable woman out there hellbent on killing him for the spiritual transgressions she so strongly believed he had committed.

It had been the right thing, for you personally, to go home. It felt good to be in the embrace of family, to gather with the people you loved and support one another after such a scare. It had admittedly been far too long since you had been home, regardless, and you made a vow to not let it be so long in the future. On Wednesday, Maddie and her mother came by with a casserole and you took is to the kitchen to allow them a chance to visit with your parents – to let them relax in the living room.

The shot of the coastal highway on the TV screen in the corner of the kitchen caught your eye as you began to assemble a salad to balance the richness of the casserole. It screamed for your attention, despite its anonymous, sundrenched beauty. Grasping the salad bowl tightly, you reached out to turn up the volume, your eyes skating over the variety of emergency vehicles assembled at the scene…the automotive debris scattered across the asphalt. That’s when his name splashed across the screen.

 Austin Butler in Critical Condition

“The award-winning actor was transported by rescue helicopter to Cedars-Sinai Medical Centre where he is listed in critical condition. His driver was taken by ambulance to a nearby hospital in stable condition. The female driver of the vehicle suspected of running him off the road was pronounced dead at the scene. The FBI is now confirming that she was their primary suspect in a string a threatening letters sent to the actor…”

You had not even noticed the heirloom crystal bowl slide from your fingers and shatter against the kitchen tile until Maddie called your name sharply from the doorway. You glanced down through rapidly blurring eyes and swore thickly, crouching down to quickly pick up the scattered shards. Shock had stolen all sensation from your fingertips, the countless nicks on your skin marked only by red blossoms of blood.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Maddie shouted and yanked you back at which point you collapsed against her sobbing. You had failed him. You had left for selfish personal reasons and now he was clinging to life alone in a hospital room.

Several Band-Aids and a cup of tea later, you were once again packing your suitcase. The gut-wrenching reaction to his accident had equalled that you’d felt for your own mother. And was hanging around like a bad penny, filling you to the brim with nervous energy. There was no possible way you could deny what Austin meant to you any longer. You would only be lying to yourself. To him. And he deserved better than that.

“You’re gonna make it to LA ok?” Maddie asked quietly as she zipped up your suitcase and you sighed heavily.

“I’ll do my best, Mads…thank you…” You hugged her tightly before saying proper farewells to your parents and heading out.

It was well past visiting hours when you arrived at the hospital, but you’d called Scott on the way and he was there waiting to lead you up to Austin’s hospital room.

“He’s been upgraded to stable condition, you’ll be relieved to know.” He informed you as the doors to the elevator closed.

“Scott I’m so sorry I…” You looked to him as you rose floor by floor.

He looked to you startled.

“What on earth…sorry you weren’t there to get hurt? There’s nothing you could have done to prevent this. Nothing you could have done in that car but increase the list of injured or worse. Thank hell you weren’t there…How’s your mom?” He asked quickly and you smiled just the hint of a smile.

“So much better…I…it was good to see her.”

“Good.” He nodded firmly and led you to the room where an armed police officer watched the door. He introduced you to the man as Austin’s bodyguard, all pretense now dropped in light of the story having gone public since the accident, and quietly led you into the room where Austin lay. “I’ll leave you to it…” He whispered and nodded before stepping out.

Because the unit was a higher level of care, the door remained open to the nursing station to allow them to keep an eye on him, but he otherwise had the spacious room to himself. The bed and monitoring equipment only served to make him look small. You pressed your fingers to your lips, trying to smother your shaking breaths as they seemed to thunder in the otherwise quiet room. The only other sound was the beeping of his heart rate monitor – reassuringly steady.

Your eyes scanned across his face and down his body, taking stock of marks that would bruise and numerous abrasions. The image of him beneath the stark white, antiseptic blankets began to blur and you sealed your hand over your mouth as you tried to focus on the expanse of the city lights out the window beside him, tried to regain your composure, when you heard him rasp your name.

You moved closer to the head of the bed, leaning in to see his eyes made glassy from pain medication trying to focus on your face.

“Austin, I’m here…” He reached out with his left hand and you took it carefully, trying to wipe your tears away quickly with your other.

“Oh Betty, there you go wastin’ those tears again…” He murmured and you couldn’t help but laugh.

He chuckled briefly before wincing with a groan and you frowned deeply.

“Jus’ some broken ribs, I’ll be all right…”

“Shit…I shoulda been there Austin…I’m so sorry…” You whispered, fresh tears spilling from your eyes.

He reached with his free hand, grunting in pain as he wiped at your face, only making your lip wobble, sobs building in your throat.

“I have to resign.” You choked out suddenly and his eyes flashed to your face.

“What jus’ because you weren’t here?!” He asked incredulously, words slightly slurred.

Shaking your head, you took a deep, fortifying breath.

“I’ve gone and done something I shouldn’t.” You whispered.

His brow furrowed as he looked at you quizzically.

“I’ve fallen in love with the client.” You confessed, holding your breath as you were only brave enough to risk glances at his face before looking back for your entwined hands.

“Oh, thank god” he exhaled after what felt like an eternity and released your hand, cupping the back of your neck to pull you close.

You braced your hands on other side of the hospital bed, not wanting to jostle him, to cause him any pain, as you brushed your lips against his gently.

“You’d better give me a better kiss than that…” He teased, mouth moving against yours as he held you stubbornly close.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Austin…” You protested, feeling the rough edges of the abraded side of lips against your own.

“I’ve been dyin’ to kiss ya since you threw Marwan into the floor in Palm Springs…please….” He whispered.

“How much medication have you had…” You hissed, half playful, half mortified, still hovering above his lips.

He whined your name, completely washing away the last of your resolve and you slotted your mouth against his firmly, shifting your weight onto one hand to slide the other into his hair on the uninjured side of his face. He hummed against your lips eagerly, fingers curling into the skin at the base of your neck as his lips moved against yours needily. You sighed deeply, warmth spreading through your entire body, until a politely rapping on the door frame had you quickly pulling back from his lips.

“So sorry to interrupt…” The nurse could barely contain her grin as she came in to check Austin over, noting his vitals in his electronic chart, before leaving you two alone.

“Guess I don’t get a vacation…” He pouted playfully and you shook your head, pulling up a chair to settle at the head of his bed.

“One day at a time, Austin…Let’s get you home first, ok? And for that to happen, you need to sleep…” You smoothed his brow with your thumb, fingertips stroking his curls.

“Just wanted to go to the beach while the groomers got Biscuit ready for our trip…the car came outta nowhere…They said Ari is ok, he’s really ok, right?” He rambled sleepily.

“Yes, at a hospital in Santa Barbara, stable just like you.” You reassured him gently.

“You’ll be here when I wake up…? You’ll stay?” He whispered with open fragility.

“Yes, I’ll be right here Austin…rest…”

“Love you, too…” He breathed.

You smiled softly as he closed his eyes, quickly falling asleep, clinging to your other hand.

Sleeping in a chair with your hand trapped in his grip was hardly comfortable, nor were the frequent interruptions by the nurses to check his vitals and administer frequent cognitive tests – you surmised the reason was a concussion he had neglected to share with you, restful. But there was honestly no other place in the entire world you would have rather been. Daylight brought the arrival of his father and you moved to step out, but Austin insisted you stay.

He held his hand out to you once he’d settled back into the bed following a nurse assisted bathroom trip. You shyly avoided the knowing smile of his father, sliding your fingers through his. The attending physician arrived not long after and delivered the full litany of Austin’s injuries. You clung to his hand silently as his father asked the follow-up questions, doing your utmost to fight back the urge to let the guilt overwhelm you once more.

“We anticipate that Mr. Butler will be able to head home tomorrow but he will absolutely require assistance in his home, including supportive devices, and physiotherapy as he recovers.”

You heard Austin’s father suck the air between his teeth, knowing he had a life and responsibilities of his own back in Arizona while you? Well, you were recently unemployed and more than willing to take the time off to care for the man you loved.

“I’ll be happy to take care of everything.” You swallowed and looked to Austin. “If you’re ok with that?”

He looked to you, face softening.

“I am more than ok with that, you beautiful woman…” He sighed lovingly and lifted your hand to kiss the back of it gently.

“Wonderful, I’ll send in Occupational Therapy to help you prepare for his homecoming.” The physician departed just as Kate appeared, looking fresh off the plane from somewhere tropical. She even smelled of coconut suntan lotion.

Though he was still quite medicated, Kate worked with Austin to determine the loose parameters of a press release before she set up in the corner of the room, calling her team to hammer it out. Austin’s father pulled you into a grateful hug before making a trip to cafeteria for coffee and food for the three of you and you remained at Austin’s side as he still refused to release your hand.

Once everyone was fed, the nurses insisted Austin needed his rest. Kate took Austin’s father home while you met with OT in a nearby conference room, arranging for the necessary items to be delivered. You gave Trey a call to make sure he could let the deliveries in, before creeping back into the room to doze some more in the chair. As visiting hours came to a close, you left a pouting Austin for the night, placating him with the knowledge that you were going to his house to set up for him to come home in the morning.

You were struck by the scent of flowers when you stepped into the house, every surface on the main floor covered in floral arrangements from friends, family, colleagues, and acquaintances. The second thing you noticed was a very enthusiastic Biscuit who was surely very confused and lonely but looked very good from her well-timed trip to the groomer’s.

Austin’s father already had a head start when you arrived, setting up the shower chair and the supportive pillows on the bed. The last thing that had to be done was taking the mattress from the murphy bed in the office to lay on the floor of Austin’s bedroom so that you could be close by to assist him in moving around. You made up the beds with fresh sheets before passing out for the night with Biscuit in your arms, alarm set for six the next morning.

You showered and ate the breakfast that Austin’s father generously prepared for the two of you before you got the discharge call from the nurse. The pair of you headed over in Austin’s car to pick him up, greeted by a beaming, lanky man in a wheelchair whose mood was utter elation at being released. In a group effort, the three of you got him to his feet and into the front seat of the car, buckling him in and closing the door before taking him home.

The next few weeks were entirely devoted to getting Austin well. His father was able to stay for a few days, cooking all the meals and filling the freezer with food. At first, Austin mainly rested, but you insisted he spend some time on the main floor and outside, keeping him moving to avoid any negative complications. His physiotherapy appointments began after a few days and they carefully taped up his ribs which went a long way to improving his comfort level. His bruises slowly transitioned through the rainbow as they healed, and his abrasions smoothed out. The many kisses he insisted upon helped you to confirm this.

Scott arranged for the FBI to present their findings on the case to Austin at home, and the entire team breathed a sigh of relief when it was confirmed that the deceased driver was indeed the woman responsible for the threats and letters. With the case now closed, the contract with Lane Protective Services was ended and you found yourself alone in the house with Austin. His sister, Ashley, made a weekend visit, but on the whole his home was one of peace and solitude. One in which your rather young relationship blossomed.

As his strength increased, you began to take him on short walks with Biscuit, choosing to still carry your firearm. It would take some time, it seemed, for you to shake that habit. On a particularly warm day at the beginning of April, at Austin’s request, you settled out on the pool deck in bathing suits to soak up some sun. You found yourself smiling as you looked over his torso.

“You can barely see your bruises.” You remarked softly, fingers brushing along his side gently, well aware that he still had healing ribs beneath.

“Must be thanks to you, sweet Betty, taking such good care of me…” He grinned, hand grasping your wrist to lift your fingertips to kiss each one.

Your tongue darted out to wet your lips before pulling your lower lip to sink your teeth into it as he pressed his mouth to your palm.

“If my body wasn’t still broken…” He groaned against your skin.

“S…s..sorry.” You apologized quickly, accidentally licking your lips again.

He growled a little and cupped to back of your head, pulling you down for a hungry kiss. His lips had barely pressed against yours before his tongue was licking into your mouth, seeking yours eagerly. Sinking onto your knees on the pool deck, you braced yourself on the arm of the lounger, trying desperately to keep your body weight off of him as he seemed to be sucking the strength from your body, turning your bones into molten metal.

He pulled back with a grunt, gasping for breath as he wasn’t able to hold deep breaths just yet, but immediately moved to trail his lips down your neck, punctuating his kisses with gentle nips of his teeth that had you trembling above him.

“Austin…” You panted. “You gotta be careful…” Your warning was choked off into a moan as he sealed his mouth over your pulse point and began to suck at your skin making your control waiver.

You pushed yourself back from him, chest heaving, terrified as you’d almost crashed into him.

“Come back…” He pouted huskily, licking his lips.

“Austin…fuck I almost fell on you this isn’t safe…” You rasped, voice obviously affected.

You watched as he pulled and chewed at his lips for a moment before carefully pushing himself to sitting and then to standing.

“Come on…” He held out his hand and you took it carefully, following after him suspiciously, but also unable to deny the heat of desire pulsing through your veins.

He made a brief detour to the kitchen, setting up Biscuit with a puzzle toy before taking you upstairs, closing the bedroom door behind you.

“Lay on the bed beside me? Then you can’t fall?”

“What if I move too much?”

“I’ll tell you if it hurts, sweet Betty, I just need to touch you so badly…” He whispered heatedly as he cupped your cheeks, stealing the breath from your lungs, before leaning in to press his lips to yours in a scorching kiss that easily erased any and all reason from your mind.

He carefully walked you over to the bed, sliding up onto the pile of pillows, looking back to you expectantly once he was settled. You gingerly crawled onto the bed next to him, laying on your side as you shifted closer until you were within his reach. He pulled you close, mouth latching onto your neck once more, pulling another ragged moan from your throat as one hand came to knead at your hip and butt cheek.

Moving slowly, you slid your leg over his, giving him ample time to protest in pain before your thigh pressed against the growing bulge between his thighs. When no outcry of pain reached our ears, only a shuddering sigh against your damp skin that sent goosebumps racing down your neck, you applied subtle pressure and friction, pleased when his lips crashed into yours once more. Burying one hand into his golden curls, you allowed the other to skim down the muscles of his chest and abdomen, tracing the hard planes beneath his smooth, soft skin.

You felt his hand shift to cup between your legs, your hips bucking into his touch involuntarily as he stroked at your folds through the thin fabric of your swimsuit with his long, elegant fingers, confirming your long-suspected hypothesis that he was indeed very good with his hands. You tore your lips from his to cry out eagerly as his skilled digits pushed aside the inconvenient fabric to touch your bare skin, immediately seeking your sensitive bundle of nerves. His head shifted lower to kiss and nip at your cleavage before huffing against your chest in frustration.

“Can you take off your suit for me?” He pleaded hoarsely, looking up to you with blown pupils, only a tiny ring of blue iris now surrounding them.

Licking your lips you nodded, carefully disentangling your limbs from his to shift back, sliding from the bed to work the suit from your body. You could feel the heat of his gaze as he watched you expose your body, the moisture evaporating from your mouth, making it impossible to swallow as you climbed back onto the bed with him.

“You are unspeakably gorgeous…” He breathed, reaching out to pull you close to him, lavishing kisses along every inch of exposed skin he could now access as his fingers resumed their torment of your clit, the pad of his thumb circling and pressing at your entrance.

“Ahn! Austin!” You whimpered, bending the knee of your top leg and planting your foot between his calves to give him more room to work, admittedly greedy for his touch.

“Sweet girl you’re positively drenched…” He breathed against your breast before sealing his lips around your nipple, sinking a finger into the heat of your cunt.

You wailed and arched against him at the dual assault, fingers tugging at his hair before holding him to your breast needily. Rocking the heel of his hand against your clit, he began to rhythmically work his finger in and out of your heat before adding a second, growling hungrily against your skin at the eager gush of arousal your body rewarded him with. He withdrew his hand from between your legs, making you whimper at the loss, eyes flashing open only to be treated to the sight of him devouring every drop of your nectar from his hand.

“Oh, please I need to taste you…” He pleaded, hooded eyes burning into yours. “Can you get above me?”

You did not need a second invitation. With legs like jelly, it was more challenging than first anticipated, but with the assistance of the frame around the top of the bed you were able to kneel on the pillows on either side of his head before sinking down onto his eagerly waiting mouth. He barely gave you a moment to breathe before his wicked tongue was working through your folds, his lips slurping up your arousal, filling the room with an obscene mixture of noise as you moaned helplessly. He suckled at your clit before burying the pointed length of his tongue deep into your cunt, hooking his good arm over your hip to pull you down and encourage you to grind your bundle of nerves against his nose as he rocked his head from side to side. You pressed your face into your bicep as your thighs began to shake, eyes clenching shut as you could feel yourself just on the precipice.

One hand moved to cup your breast, massaging and pinching at your nipple as you gave in and rocked dock against Austin’s face, earning a deep moan from the man below you. The vibrations ricocheted through your body and sent you surging forward, tumbling into your release with a harsh cry of his name. Slumping forward against the wall, wave after wave of shuddering pleasure flowed through your body as you felt him avidly lap up all your body had to offer until you had to pull back, climb off him, as it was just too much – you were too sensitive.

Settling onto the mattress beside him, you leaned in to kiss Austin warmly, giggling a little at his face was soaked. He just grinned at you proudly. Rolling over, you found some tissues on the nightstand and gently wiped at his cheeks and chin before tossing them into the bin on the floor beside him, the prominent outline of his hard cock beneath his swim trunks catching your eye.

“Would you like some assistance with this?” You asked, sitting at his hip and running your fingers along the waistband of his suit.

His teeth sunk into the plush pink of his lower lip as he nodded, and you worked together to slide the bathing suit off his hips and down his legs. It was not the first time you had seen him naked – you had been helping him shower, towel off, and change since his return from the hospital, but this was different. And not just because his sizable length lay hard and angry against his abdomen. The intention set the tone, this was about pleasure, and you allowed yourself to enjoy the full expanse of his sun-kissed, freckled skin.

“Unspeakably gorgeous, was it?” You breathed and reached up to cup the tip of his length, collecting the precum that pooled there before wrapping your fingers around him, stroking his cock and delighting in the way it made the muscles of his abdomen flutter.

“Oh fuck…” He hissed, writhing against the duvet.

Licking your lips, you slithered down onto your stomach, planting an elbow between his legs and laying your chest across his uninjured hip as you licked a broad stripe from base to tip, grinning as his hips jerked towards your mouth. His whimper reminded you to be merciful and you gently began to sink your mouth down onto him, taking as much of his cock as this angle would allow, leaving your lips parted to allow your saliva to flow freely over his rest of his length and further down between his thighs.

He moaned your name as you wrapped your hand around the base of him before you began to work up and down, hollowing your cheeks and tracing the prominent vein on the underside of his cock with your tongue. He whimpered and rambled, fingers gripping the back of your head. You hummed in sympathy, and he writhed beneath you, length twitching against your tongue.

“Please! Oh, please get back up here I wanna kiss you when I cum, wanna pretend I’m inside you…” He pleaded and you pulled back, releasing his cock from your mouth with a pop, before laying on your side.

His lips crashed against yours as you slid your leg over his, hand resuming the rhythm of your mouth. His hand gripped your ass and his hips rocked in time with the strokes of your fist. You found yourself grinding your still-damp core against his thigh, earning a ragged groan against your lips.

“Gonna…gonna…” He panted and you opened your eyes to take in as much of his face as he could, his breath panting into your open mouth before he gave a sharp cry and spilled his climax against his stomach as you continued to gently stroke his length to prolong his pleasure.

As the tension left his body, allowing him to sink into the mattress, you kissed the corner of his mouth softly and retrieved a warm washcloth to clean him up. You helped him into his pajamas, frowning as he gave tiny hisses of pain, but the lopsided grin never left his lips.

A pathetic awooo from the hallway alerted you to the fact that Biscuit was well finished with her puzzle toy and now aware of her locked-out status. You quickly slid on your own pajamas before scooping her up from the doorway to settle her at Austin’s good hip to allow the pair to settle in for an afternoon nap.

He only continued to get stronger as his bones and ligaments healed, yourself and Biscuit joining him in bed nightly by the end of April. And while creative solutions were keeping the pair of you satisfied enough, when Austin’s physician finally cleared him for more strenuous activity, both of you admittedly had the same thought.

The evening began innocently enough, with a nice dinner the two of you made together, with a delicious wine now that Austin was no longer on pain medication. You talked for hours, still in the beginning stages of your relationship where there was more to discover about one another, before cleaning up the kitchen. Yet it ended with you on your back, legs hanging off the side of the mattress, propped up on your elbows as you salaciously watched him indulgently stroke his cock a few times before carefully rolling the condom down his length.

Chest heaving, cunt throbbing from the orgasm he had just wrung from you and the promise of him inside you at last, you chewed your lip impatiently.

“Don’t you go damaging those plush pretty lips, sweet Betty, I like kissing them far too much.” He leaned down carefully to prove his point, the wet muscle of his tongue twining with yours until you were both humming with need.

He straightened, guiding your hips to the very edge of the bed before sliding his length through the slick of your folds, gathering as much as possible while teasing your clit before shifting to slowly begin sinking into your wet heat. Your eyes rolled back in your head as you dropped back onto the mattress, keening softly as you gripped his wrists while he stretched and filled you impossibly full.

“Oh my…fuck you feel so good…” He hissed above you, his fingers curling into the flesh of your hips.

“Oh yes…” You panted in return, rocking your hips against his experimentally, a chorus of moans falling from both of your lips.

It was all the motivation he needed to pull his hips back before immediately sinking back into your demanding warmth. And while you wished he were closer, wished you could be wrapped up in his arms, it was amazing to finally feel so connected to him, completed by him.

“Austin!” You exclaimed, too overwhelmed to put the emotions swirling in your chest into more words beyond his name.

“I know….I know…” He panted between thrusts. “I love…you too…” He moaned your name raggedly and rocked harder, thrust faster, pushing you ever closer to release.

“Love…you…” You whimpered in return, feeling your walls starting to clamp down around him.

“Oh, fuck yes…” He quickly reached for your clit, circling it in a way that he knew after weeks of practice would make you cum, and growled happily as you did just that, scratching at his forearms a little as you clenched around his length through wave after wave of climax. “Yes!” He barked out triumphantly before thrusting erratically once, twice more, joining you in release.

You could feel him sway on his feet, recognizing that though the position had kept pressure and impact from his body it had demanded tremendous physical effort of him. You quickly shifted back to slide his length from you before guiding him to sit on the bed. Peppering his face with kisses, you rid him of the condom and then helped him into his pajamas, noticing the winces.

“Would you like heat or cold for that?” You frowned, guiding him to lay down.

“Heat please…” He sighed a little. “So worth it though…” he smirked, and you rolled your eyes playfully before kissing him gently.

“Well, it’s a good thing I left the mattress on the floor. Biscuit and I will let you have the bed tonight.” You teased before getting him some over-the-counter pain killers and a heating pad.

Tucking away the stairs that helped Biscuit access the bed, you and the dog curled up on the mattress on the floor beside him, kissing the tips of his fingers as he dropped his hand down while wishing you a good night before his slow, steady breaths filled the room.

Biscuit’s low growl startled you awake some hours later and you lay perfectly still, trying to locate the source of her upset. The less-than-subtle sound of footsteps thundering up the stairs not seconds later provided you with a very clear answer and had you surging to your feet. Your firearm was locked in a small safe on the other side of the bed and based on the speed of the approaching intruder in the hallway, you did not have time. You shook Austin awake as you launched yourself over the foot of the bed just before the door flew open, the metal of a gun barrel flashing in the glow of the streetlights from the hallway.

You surged up, under the intruder’s arm to push the muzzle upwards as he pulled the trigger, sending the bullet into the ceiling in a shower of drywall and paint chips. Biscuit was barking at a ferocious pitch you had never before heard as you struggled with the shadowy figure’s bulk, trying to wrestle the gun free. Another shot was directed into the hardwood floor before you were able to claw the gun from his hand. His elbow snapped back, slamming into your nose with a sickening crunch. A gush of warmth down your face and the coppery tang of blood filled your mouth – an oddly nostalgic sensation that took you right back to a Judo match.

The intruder let out a sudden wail and jerked back, and you felt something fluffy dart past your legs. Biscuit had scored one for the home team. The gun now fully in your grasp, you threw it into the ensuite bathroom before taking down the freshly bitten man with a Judo throw while he was distracted by the pain. You knelt in the middle of his back, pinning his arms behind him.

“Austin, I need something to tie him!” You cried out, listening to his footfalls as he made his way from the ensuite, where he must have been hiding, to the nightstand, and then over to the foot of the bed where you were.

He procured a pair of silver handcuffs and you looked to him in slight disbelief, before gesturing with your head for him to secure the assailant’s hands.

“I’m going to put him in the chair, don’t want to compromise his airway any longer….he’s probably going to say terrible things…”

“I’m ready, Betty.” Austin said through gritted teeth and you hauled the incapacitated man to his feet before forcing him down onto the chair of the built-in makeup stand that Austin’s former girlfriend had designed. “Turn on the lights?”

Everyone blinked rapidly to adjust to the sudden brightness, and you swore under your breath as you recognized the dog-walking, brick-throwing, psychopath-loving man who was supposed to be in prison in Santa Barbara.

“Gabriel.” You muttered in shock.

“You fucking godless whore bitch!” He spit at you and you didn’t bother moving, not wanting to loosen your grip on him.

You had Austin call the police on speaker phone while you strapped the man to the chair with a series of belts, as he continued to spew hate and vitriol at both you and Austin.

“Betty you’re bleeding…” Austin whispered at one point, trying to wipe at your face.

“Later…” You whispered back, not wanting to take an eye off the man.

“The love of my life is dead because of the two of you! She was a righteous woman! How is she dead and the two of you are alive! You do not deserve to walk this earth!”

The police, thankfully, showed up rather quickly and took the man back into custody. They collected the man’s firearm from the ensuite, as well the bullets from the floor and ceiling, before taking your statements and assuring you that these charges would keep the man locked up for a much longer time than throwing bricks.

You allowed Austin to pull you into the bathroom once they’d left, sitting on the counter patiently as he gently cleaned the blood from your face before testing your nose.

“I don’t think it’s broken…”

You shook your head carefully.

“Just a solid whack. I’ll have a nice pair of black eyes tomorrow, most likely.”

He frowned deeply and kissed your forehead.

“Oh, Betty I’m so sorry…”

“I’m not. That bastard deserved worse than Biscuit gave him…We should get her some extra treats.” You smiled weakly as he snorted into your hair.

“I’m going to get the ice and then the three of us are booking that damn vacation to an island far away. Deal?”

You nodded your acquiescence and it was less that thirty-six hours from the time you confirmed the booking, snuggled up against him with an ice pack pressed against your face, to the time you were sitting on a private island in the Bahamas. Biscuit was darting back and forth between you on the sand, chasing a tiny crab, making the pair of you laugh.

“Terrifying little guard dog…” Austin smirked and shifted to sit next to you, sliding an arm around your waist.

“Invaluable asset, she is.” You nodded with a grin; your black eyes hidden beneath a pair of sunglasses.

“Betty spaghetti, I love you, you know that?” He kissed your temple, making you smile softly.

“Yes, I do, Mr. Butler.” You grinned. “Love you, too Austin.” You pulled him in for a kiss.

“I’ve been meaning to ask though…” You smirked when he eventually pulled back to allow you both a chance to catch your breath and he raised a curious eyebrow. “…about those handcuffs in your nightstand…”

If You'll Be My Bodyguard, I Can Be Your Long Lost Pal Masterlist

Tag List: @littlewhiterose, @austinsvlrslut, @emrysdreams, @slowsweetlove, @xstrengthxinxtragedyx, @shelbygeek, @kingdomforapony, @artlover8992, @eliseinmemphis, @haydensith, @breadsquash, @chimchimjiminie16, @qxiva, @lilsiz, @18lkpeters

[leoleolovesdc]

I would love to write a TTS essay explaining why Gothel isn’t Cassandra’s mother and Frederick and Arianna aren’t Rapunzel’s parents and the show’s insistence on pushing parent/child struggles into those characters is kind of really forced so that’s exactly what I’m gonna do:

(Disclaimer: this got really messy and is kind of a bunch of nonesense glued together, so read it with a bit of patiece lmao)

Rapunzel grew up for the first 18 years of her life with Gothel, when TTS starts she has been living with Fred and Ari for 6 months and it’s wild to me how Raps already calls them mom and dad, but I won’t judge this part, she wants to be their daughter and wants to be a family so it makes sense that she would call them that way regardless if it feels natural or not, but I think where the series really fails is when it starts (by the very first episode) to give Rapunzel and Frederick father-daughter struggles, which is complete bs if you ask me, those two don’t know each other. Rapunzel shouldn’t have a “oh, I can’t disobey my father” train of thought because she doesn’t even know him and therefore he isn’t her father, at least not yet. She shouldn’t be so trusting of his judgement of love for her because they don’t have intimacy and the fact that they are fighting and disagreeing so much after having just reconnected is wild. Arianna is not that important for the plot, but her relationship with Rapunzel being so unapologetically perfect also rubs me the wrong way. Rapunzel was ruined by her mother, she was abused her whole life and I don’t think she would just let anyone fulfill the role Gothel did without getting some therapy to unpack everything wrong that her mother, the one that actually raised her, did.

Rapunzel had a narcissistic mother, an awlful one who never loved her, but that doesn’t mean that she didn’t love Gothel. Raps lived her whole by that woman’s side, she loved her more than anything in the world and realizing the manipulation and abuse wouldn’t just immediately stop a person as kind and forgiving as Rapunzel to still love her like a mother, because like it or not Gothel raised her for 18 years. She wasn’t a good mother by any means but she was her mother nonetheless.

Another point is that at the end of season one Rapunzel goes away from Corona to explore, learn about the world and her own powers. I am not exactly sure how much time passes from the beginning to the end of s1 but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t more than 6 months, so Rapunzel lives with her bio parents for about a year and then goes straight into a one year long self discovery journey and you’re trying to tell me that she missed them? Not even just missed, but when she got hold of an artifact that showed what you waned the most what she saw were her biological parents and the people of Corona who in the first episode she claims to not remember the names of? That’s some real bs right there and I have no idea how the show runners thought this made any sort of sense. She doesn’t fucking know them, maybe she respects or care about her folks, but she couldn’t have possibly built this life long parent/child relationship that the show treats like she did.

Now, with Cassandra it’s a bit more complicated. She lived with Gothel for about four years of her life before being abandoned, but she very obviously didn’t remember any of this, either because she was too young or because she repressed those memories. Gothel didn’t seem to love Cass in the slightest, but because Cass grew up with only a emotionally distant father she longed for this reassurance that she was loved by a parent figure at some point in her life, she blames Rapunzel for everything that went wrong with her life, which can make sense but also is a bit awkward to sustain once you analyze the actual facts. Yes, Rapunzel and Eugene killed Gothel, but she didn’t mean to do that, it was Eugene’s plan and he only did it because Raps had literally agreed to be used and locked up from the real world for the rest of her life. Cass isn’t dumb, she would know better than lashing out at her friends for accidentally saving her from living with a narcissist who didn’t care about her. Gothel isn’t Cassandra’s mother, Cass doesn’t have a mother because she didn’t have anyone to actually raise her.

If I was to rewrite Tangled we’d have a very different approach to how bio parents are handled, especially Rapunzel’s. I don’t think she should be close to Arianna and Frederick at all, heck, I don’t even think she should call them mom and dad. Cause bear with me, if you randomly found ot you are adopted by the time you were 18 and actually went to live with your biological family for about a year do you think you’d even have this sort of intimacy and bond with them?

[evansbby]

in talks of other fandoms (and not a cod/ video games person myself)

BABE HAVE U CHECKED OUT THE RAFE CAMERON/OBX FANDOM?????

the best transition babe -amazing smut, but also like the best angst-y perv-y blurbs and series you’ll ever see. drew starley is HOT AS HELL I SWEAR and the girlies write him so good!!!

it’s also like HEAVY in the dd/lg vibes and pervert-y bsf or bffs bsf five. truly so good

if you’d like any refs to get started (cuz there are legit so many authors for this fandom and u do need to weed out the rly good ones sometimes- the activity i swear it’s literally at its peak lol) lemme knowww

obv we still love and are obsessed with sri- but in terms of engagement and stuff i know how much that feeling just suck and if you’d just like some lil fun- i rly recommend (can’t hide my ulterior motives that i want my favourite author on here to try out my favourite fandom currently because she’s the reason why i initially even stayed on tumblr) ❤️❤️

I see Rafe stuff on my dash all the time! A lot of my mutuals who used to be cevans girlies transitioned to rafe girlies bahaha, so whenever they like or reblog smth, it shows up on my dash!

But tbh, and I’ve said this on here before, Rafe lowkey annoys me and that interferes with my ability to find him hot 😭😭 it’s the writing of the Rafe character that annoys me bc when I watched obx, I fully expected him to be the hot troubled older brother which he IS but they gave him ZERO romantic storyline! They teased us with the Kiara thing but never followed through with it and that show annoys me bc it had so much romance and angst potential but they chose to focus on the treasure hunting wHICH NO ONE CARES ABOUT AND IT GETS OLD AFTER THREE STRAIGHT SEASONS LIKE BITCH I DO NOT CARE ABOUT BLACK BEARD TREASURE CAN YOU JUST GIVE ME RELATIONSHIP DRAMA AND RAFE KIARA ENEMIES TO LOVERS?? like send these kids to college fr!!!

Anyways Rafe is such a wasted opportunity of a character bc genuinely Drew Starkey is so hot AND he can act and clearly has a huge fanbase and yet his character is being wasted bc literally when I watch a show, most of the time all I care about is romance bc I’m just a girl 😭😭😭

But anyways, the fact that his character is so annoying on the show makes me not be able to read fanfics about him or take them seriously 😭😭 like I just cannot suspend my disbelief bc the show gives us NOTHING. NOTHING AT ALL. So if I ever start reading a Rafe fic, my mind will just substitute Rafe for Ari tbh 😂😂😭😭 like automatically.

And I’m sorry bestie, but for that reason I cannot write for Rafe either 😭😭 but the Rafe fandom does not need me, they have plenty of writers writing juicy fics for him and yeah I agree it’s all very dd/lg centric and nasty fucking smut centric and I WISH I COULD ENJOY THAT but I guess you should blame the obx show writers for that

[midheavenastrology]

🏹if u have the asteroid eris in aries 🔥☄️🕯️in the 12th house - spiritual warrior 🧿🌟- basically u are literally fighting the spirit world/bad vibes/energy vampires 🧛‍♀️🩸that lurk in the subconscious/ephemeral ✨world

🏹leo ♌️ and prominent 5th house placements: probs have a very psychic link to cats 🐈 i tend to believe that if cats are naturally drawn to you, then ur pineal 👁️ gland is a lot more open 🧿and reflective to energies beyond the physical plane 👽🛸no shade to dogs/dog lovers ( i love dogs 🐕) but dogs are def more root 🌲🏕️chakra animals :)

🏹if u have the moon 🌝 cancer or neptune 🌌in the 3rd house, people with lunar 🌛🌜or neptunian qualities will often without knowing it tell you something you need to hear 👂: like an intuitive 🪬knowing. for ex: my friend is a cancer moon, rising and i have cancer in my 3rd house..whenever she says something that comes from her higher self (like she's reading tarot) 🃏🎴i take note because it often comes into fruition 🍒🍉🍓🍊🍋later.

🏹if u want to have great seggs 🥵♨️🌶️may I recommend hookin up when the moon is in a fire sign 🔥or earth 🌲sign ? (air 🌬️is all about mental 🧠stimulation, so it’s not rly going to bring seggsy energy and water 💧 is self contained and can get lost in emotions 😩so it’s better to be alone during a water moon (maybe scorpio ♏️ maybe..but could get toxic 😬🙈real fast)

🏹people trash 🗑️🚮 8th house synastry and i get it..it can turn super super toxic ☠️real quick (obsession, jealousy, possessiveness blah blah) but if u crave and desire 🍆this kinda passionate ❤️‍🔥exchange, 8th house could be a hot synastry aspect for y’all. not to mention it’s the house of SEGGS 🍆🍑so u will def def have RLY great sex with whoever lands in ur 8th house. like eat me up, lick u all over, go several rounds kinda passion ❤️‍🔥

🏹hear me out y’all: i kno traditional 🥱synastry puts earth+water 🌲💧together and fire+air 🌬️🔥together but I think in particular capricorn ♑️ placements are better off with air 🌬️signs; why ? because we’re an extremely cerebral 🧠earth sign. we're sandwiched between sagittarius (the higher mind/scholar/teacher) and aquarius (THE intellectual mastermind) it’s no wonder we always seem to attract air signs…🌬️🌬️🌬️

or is it just me lol ? 😪🤓

🏹be careful during a mars ❤️‍🔥🔥🥵transit in ur chart- for example: let’s say u have mars in the 5th house and it’s leo ♌️ season (leo rules the 5th house) u will unknowingly attract aggressive 😡🤬😤confrontational people. basically they’re karmic peeps who come back to fight u 🤺🧯take them as you will (my strategy is always detachment) also this could attract overtly sexual ❤️‍🔥🍆🌶️energy as well- like peeps be hollering at u all day long 😮‍💨 (also peep the sign as well..if it’s in pisces, they can lash out at you by acting like a victim 😭or do the blame game)

🏹on the other hand when venus 🥰😘😍is transiting ur chart, be god dang thankful cus ur literally attracting pleasure 💘💌👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏼abundance in the house it’s transiting - i mean sometimes that could be not so chill if it’s in a not so fun house but every house has its good/bad. let's say you have venus in the 11th house -then u will attract lots o’ cute af friendships 👯‍♀️👯👯‍♂️community support 🧞‍♀️🧞🧞‍♂️and help in ur hopes+dreams- check the sign as well to see what kinda friends, community support you’ll attract- if it’s in leo, it will be creative 🎨👩‍🎨👩🏼‍🎤artistic, flashy and beautiful 💄👸🤴peeps. venus in the most layman terms is the things you love, so when it’s being aspected, suddenly there will be an abundance of the things you love 💕

🏹astrologer robert glasscock 🙏 says that the angular houses (1, 4, 7, 10) are ur present, cadent is ur (3, 6, 9, 12) past and succèdent (2, 5, 8, 11) is ur future. if this is true and u believe in timeline jumping ⚛️⚗️- try to understand ur planetary placements in the succèdent houses and how that future 🔮could unfold.

for ex: say you have mostly fire🔥 and air 🌬️placements in those houses/this lifetime might be about embracing more of ur masculine 💪energy/take action. also dependent on the signs and planets- i have the moon in 5th in virgo (subconscious creativity) 🎨👩🏼‍🎤🎸🎷venus in 11th in pisces: creativity and expressing this creativity as a mode of healing ❤️‍🩹 is v impt to me.

🏹also a great way to really tap into what ur soul calling is is to look at ur venus 💘and moon 🌝sign placements/aspects: think of it: ur moon is ur emotional 🥹 comfort, it’s what u are naturally gifted 🎁🧧at and venus is what you love 🥰it's honestly the easiest way to see what could bring us the greatest joy 😎🥳🤸‍♀️🎆when fully acknowledged and understood.

🏹i have a theory that u start to meet more people 🧍‍♀️🧍🏻🧍‍♂️who embody ur progressed chart. it's like they’re secret teachers 👩‍🏫 that teach u how they express being that sign: for ex; say u were a venus in pisces ♓️ and now ur progressed is venus in aries ♈️ u will start to meet more aries placements: this shows you the parts of u that u might need to shed 🥲in order to progress more in life. it doesn’t mean u aren’t a venus in pisces anymore just that some of the traits of this placement has to transform 🐛🦋so u can basically “progress” in ur soul 🌌journey ..does this make sense ?

🏹i believe masculine ♀︎♂︎♀︎♁ energies ⚛️embody their mars+sun ✿✿✿signs more and feminine energies ⚛️embody their moon+venus signs more. what do y'all think ? maybe jupiter for masculine 🔥as well and ❤️‍🔥lilith for feminine.

🏹fire signs🔥🔥🔥- how many of y’all have a fireplace 🏕️at ur place lol

🏹people who have virgo ♍️ libra ♎️ and scorpio ♏️ placements prominently in their chart : chefs kiss 🤌 y'all are the bombshell 👸💋💄🥰personified: u are both the maiden, goddess and femme fatale 😎

🏹saturn 🪐 influenced signs- (capricorn, aquarius) have the most beautiful bone 🦴🩻😇🤤structure- like no joke, y'all look like greek statues. 🗿🗽

🏹if u wanna embody ur bad bitch 💋🌶️❤️‍🔥💄💃energy: channel ur lilith placement: what sign and what house is it in and what aspects is it making. for ex: lilith in pisces ♓️in the 8th house 💀⚰️🪦aspecting saturn 🪐: u get into ur bad bitch era ❤️‍🔥when u become a spiritual warrior 🗡️✊that becomes a channel for others to transform ⛓️🔗their old constructs of sex+death 🍆⚰️and money 💰

🏹virgo placements have the best style 👗👚👖👙🥻👘🥼🩱fight me on this 🤺

🏹if the benefic 😎👏🍀🌞🕶️planets are transiting ur 12th house, u best believe ur angel 👼 guides are watching over u- expect lots and lots of synchronicities 🕍🌻🍄🐚divine timing ⏱️ and unexpected abundance 🤘🎉🍦

that's all 🌞🍀🌞🍀🌞🍀🌞🍀🌞 i hope y'all enjoyed and got some fruitful 🍒🍑🍉insights 🧘‍♀️🧿🪬👁️🔮

happy virgo full moon y'all (iz my moon sign 🌝🌚🎑

love y'all 💜💘💌

[sauerland-2001]

I don’t want to be too harsh on the second season, because it’s essentially a kids show and I have no business writing some super serious review about it :D

It’s still a good little show, I just missed season one‘s sweetness and care for the core characters. Remember when Marlon was a fully rounded character, in scenes with his mom about his ambition and willingness to sacrifice things so he could become a surf pro? Remember his friendship with Ari??

Remember Bhodi‘s family issues? Remember Poppy‘s other brother??

Introducing three (!) new characters to antagonize the established ones was…a choice. Why not use the Griff gang to cause more trouble? Where were they?? Wren took up SO much screen time and for what. Same with her siblings.

Summer is now close to sainthood. She took being blamed for the trashed hotel room pretty well, she took the blame for the smashed store window, she tried again and again to make nice with Wren, she forgave Bax that he sabotaged her board - season 1 Summer would have done at least one stupid thing as a reaction, but I guess this is her growing up.

I like both Summer and Ari, but I still don’t see them as this amazing couple that needs to be together. They were underdeveloped in season 1, so seeing Summer all hung up about him was weird.

The worst thing this season was that they touched the Poppy/Bodhi friendship. You don’t do that, writers. Those two are unbreakable. Glad they made up.

Now to the good things: Bodhi being into girls, amazing. Please continue, show.

Also, A+ for not ignoring the issue of racism and sexism in the sport. Little things like there not being any make up for Poppy’s skin tone or the stylist groaning about Bodhi‘s hair. And of course the awful diversity comment, just in case viewers missed the earlier racist clues.

The surf scenes looked better and glossier than in season 1.

The respect for the First Nations.

Marlon speaking Portuguese, loved it. No subtitles either, well done.

Glad they didn’t forget about Tommo‘s problem with the pro side of surfing. I’m not sure he goes about it the right way when it comes to Ari, but he clearly means well. He’s just a bit of a bulldozer. They have a very interesting father son dynamic.

Also glad they didn’t forget about Ari‘s anxiety and that we got updates on him still being in therapy and taking medication now. His dad was right when he said that those things don’t make it easier for Ari to deal with the pressure of the pro business. What a real moment when he couldn’t remember if he had taken his medicine or not :(

Anyway, I’d love to see a third season, but I won’t be heartbroken if things end here.

[mrsreginagold]

Fic: Take A Better Look In The Mirror

Fandom: Nikita 

Pairing: Ari Tasarov x Nikita Mears (Nikari)

Rating: R

Spoilers: Canon-divergent AU for season two, episodes ten and eleven; Nikita ends up staying at the Udinov estate as Ari’s guest. 

Summary: After a revelatory evening with the man she once considered an enemy, Nikita makes a decision that alters the trajectory of their relationship. 

Author’s note: This is possibly the steamiest piece I’ve written for my beloved pairing. Jury’s still out. I would not consider it explicit, as I have a specific level of detail that I’m comfortable with writing, but I did push my limits a little more than usual. There’s still some fluff and cuteness however, because I love these two far too much not to include some banter.

On AO3

Take A Better Look In The Mirror

                  The décor of the Udinov mansion was lavish, opulent and indicative of the old-world wealth that had resulted in it being built. It was the polar opposite of the foster homes that Nikita Mears had bounced to and from throughout her youth, and yet being in such a fancy establishment didn’t fill her with the envy that she expected it would. 

                  “It’s a little off-putting and stifling,” she admitted, clinging to Ari Tasarov’s arm as he escorted her back to the room she was temporarily inhabiting. “And it feels haunted. I can’t really blame Alex for not wanting it back, even if she has fond memories of growing up here with her father.”

                  “If we’re being candid: neither can I,” her companion nodded, glancing briefly at the tapestries that decorated the walls off the hallway they were walking up. “The hidden passageways certainly don’t help matters. It would be like living in a Poe story.”

                  “Exactly! You could direct a horror film in this place,” she shivered and leaned further into him on instinct. 

                  A low, alluring chuckle escaped him at her remark. “Perhaps that’s what she should do instead of keeping it – rent it out to film studios.”

                  “It’s not a bad idea,” grinning, Nikita nudged at his shoulder. 

                  “It’s nice to hear you praise a suggestion of mine,” a warm, genuine smile crossed Ari’s handsome face. “And here we are. That went much quicker than I thought it would,” he couldn’t help a look of disappointment once they drew to a halt in front of the door.

                  “Actually,” she grasped at his bicep to keep him from leaving. “I could use your assistance.”

                  “Oh?” he quirked a brow. “With what?”

                  “My dress,” she pushed the door open and coaxed him inside with her, turning around to gesture at the back of her evening gown. “When I was getting ready earlier, the zipper kept getting stuck, so I’m afraid I’ll rip the fabric.”

                  “Ah,” his hands settled on her shoulders, squeezing reassuringly. “In that case we could do with more light.” He flipped the switch on the wall, which flooded the space with a cozy yellow glow. 

                  She guided him over to where there was an ornate, floor-length mirror and kept her back turned. “Is this better?”

                  “Much.”

                  Nikita swallowed a moan when Ari’s long, elegant fingers whispered across her bare skin before locating the metal fastening. 

                  Carefully, he drew the zipper down, mindful of the delicate silk it was holding together. 

                  Her breath hitched as she felt the cool air wafting in through a nearby window hit her flesh, goosebumps erupting along her arms while her partner completed his task. “Could you go close that? I didn’t realize I’d left it open.”

                  “Certainly.”

                  While he was momentarily preoccupied, she surveyed her own reflection – noting the subtle flush to her cheeks and well-aware of the mounting pool of warmth beginning to gather below her stomach. 

                  The rogue agent swallowed again to quell the unexpected surge of butterflies. She had never been a woman to fall prey to rash, impulsive decisions, but there was simply no denying how badly she desired the man who was currently ensuring her own comfort. 

                  He returned to her side. “Was there anything else before I turn in?”

                  Slowly, she turned around and let her dress drop to the floor, her choice clear. 

                  There was a long pause as his gaze raked over her lithe, athletic form. 

                  “Nikita…” she swore that the resonant timbre of his voice deepened, realization blooming in his bright blue eyes. “What are you doing?”

                  She brought her fingers up to his lips to shush him. “For once in my life, what I want.”

                  Ari peered down at her, that startling gaze of his seeming to penetrate deep into her soul, searching for any hint of deception. 

                  To clarify any lingering confusion, Nikita curled her hands around his necktie and yanked him forward so she could capture his mouth with her own. 

                  He froze – but just for a moment – his own feelings becoming the driving force that propelled him to gather her into his arms and return the embrace with fervor. 

                  Relief flooded her system, and she kissed him back just as eagerly while she shoved his suit coat down his broad shoulders. 

                  Recklessly, he tugged his arms free, his soft lips straying to dart firefly kisses along the slope of her jaw before lingering at the hollow of her throat with his tongue.

                  Her knees threatened to buckle, a whimper tearing from her when he scraped his teeth deliberately across her clavicle. 

                  He pulled away for air, the stunning color of his irises nearly invisible due to his pupils dilating with arousal. “Do you trust me?”

                  Breathless, she nodded. 

                  “Turn back around,” he commanded, though the tender kiss he brushed to the shell of her ear was a clear sign that he was not intending on being rough. 

                  She twirled to face the mirror, her pulse jumping as she watched him slowly undo the buttons to his dress shirt, so it fell open over his chest. She was now faced with a firm, sculpted torso dusted liberally with dark hair, the warmth at her core leaping upwards a few degrees just from the sight of him. 

                  He shrugged out of the garment and then stepped forward, so his taller form was flush against hers. 

                  She chewed at her lower lip when his arms circled around her midsection, tugging her in those few centimeters needed so there was barely any space between them. Then: he grazed his mouth to her neck while drifting one hand up and the other down. 

                  Nikita reached back and briefly shut her eyes with a quiet sound, her fingers winding into the soft strands of Ari’s dark brown hair as he languidly massaged her sensitive flesh through the lace. 

“Eyes open,” he muttered, biting teasingly at her shoulder. 

She did so just in time to see his other hand dip between her legs.

                  She let out a half-strangled sound while he worked utter magic, trembling under the skill of his hands and arcing into his touch as best she could. 

                  He mumbled something under his breath in his native tongue and deftly unhooked her bra, baring her torso to continue unhindered. 

                  Nikita cried out when his ministrations turned more insistent and used her free hand to ensure no barriers remained. 

                  “Are you always this needy?” Ari purred, clearly delighting in the power he had over her. 

                  “Just don’t stop,” she gasped, writhing under his grasp. 

                  He bit down on her neck hard enough to leave a mark but listened. 

                  He didn’t let up until he brought her artfully to the brink and she was a quivering mess that he had to catch so he could carry her over to the bed. 

                  Nikita was still quaking from bliss and only mildly aware of Ari undressing fully while she stretched out over the silk and velvet blankets. “Gimme a minute,” she exhaled slowly, reaching for him when he joined her. 

                  He settled next to her, but didn’t make a move right away, content for the moment to smooth her messy hair away from her gaze and admire the wanton image that she presented. 

                  From her vantage point, the view was just as nice now that there was no obstructing clothing. Every possible inch of his lean, yet remarkably chiseled form was on display, and she took leave to appreciate what was before her. Her eyes traveled down along the breadth of his torso and then lingered over the toned planes of his chest and abdomen and the taper of his waist, eventually drifting lower. 

                  As far as she was concerned, he was perfect. 

                  Gradually, she traced a pattern through his chest hair, turning towards him and slinging a leg over his waist to keep them close together. “Can I ask you something?”

                  “I’d say after what just occurred you’re allowed to ask me whatever you want,” he laughed, his arms draping around her so he could rub circles across her back.

                  “I was just wondering if you’d ever…well, fantasized –

                  “Yes. Multiple times.”

                  “I didn’t finish the question!”

                  “You didn’t have to, it’s written all over your face,” his dimples flashed. “The better question here is have you –

                  “YES. Repeatedly,” she groaned and hid her head against the pillow. 

                  “It’s a little late to be embarrassed, dear.” 

                  Though she couldn’t see his expression, she could easily picture it and whirled back to face him again. “I should have known you’d make pillow talk as difficult as you do anything else!”

                  “So it’s my fault?” Given the cheshire-cat grin that was directed her way, Ari was very much luxuriating in their banter. 

                  “You’re incorrigible,” Nikita narrowed her eyes. 

                  “Maybe, but you seem to like it,” he stretched out lazily, and then drew her into a tender yet passion-filled kiss, which effectively derailed whatever remained of her train of thought.

                  She toppled backwards onto the mattress, pulling him along so that he enveloped her body with his.

                  Soon enough, she was lost to the velvet sensation of his skin, her nails forming crescent moon shapes when she latched onto his back as his lips strayed from hers to gain purchase elsewhere. 

                  Heated, open-mouthed kisses drifted over her throat, then her shoulders, until he finally skimmed down so he could lavish her breasts with attention. 

                  Her hands fisted into his hair, arching off the bed as he took his time. He seemed determined to worship every inch of her, and she was not about to stop him. 

                  Sweetly, he placed a kiss over her heart before diving lower, lingering at her navel for a second and then – finally placing that amazing mouth where she hoped he would. 

                  Her hips bucked in natural response, another strangled moan escaping that warped into his name repeated like a mantra as she grabbed onto a pillow for leverage.

                  She could feel him smirk,  which only sent pulses of overwhelming want rushing through her system. 

                  Sweat gleamed on her naked form the longer that he wore on, until at last, a loud exclamation ripped from her throat that signified just how well he had pleased her. 

                  He rested his chin on her stomach to watch her as she calmed down, her body shaking from release.

                  She tilted her head curiously, noticing how intently he seemed to be studying her. “What?”

                  “I’m marveling over how beautiful you are,” he confessed, crawling back up so that he could hover over her. 

                  Wanting to return the favor for what had just transpired, she reached down. 

                  He hissed sharply and attempted to dissuade her, ensuring her that it wasn’t necessary.

                  “Let me try,” she insisted. 

                  It was not long before he was the one at her mercy, his chest heaving as he struggled for breath as her actions turned bold. 

                  His reaction was probably what enticed her the most. She had never been so blatantly erotic with someone else, and when it was his turn to careen over the edge, she was the one grinning. 

                  They took a few minutes to recover from the onslaught, exchanging languid, grateful kisses until they had regained enough energy. 

                  She found that she loved how his taste mixed with hers, almost a mirror to their entwined bodies. 

                  Ari turned so he could recline Nikita against the pillows, trapping her beneath his solid build so he could make her his in every sense. 

                  She raised her hips in an invitation that he gladly took, joining them together with a decisive thrust. 

                  Searing warmth caused her nerve endings to go into overdrive. He fit with her so perfectly that stars already burst against her eyelids. 

                  And then he began to move in earnest and her world spun. 

                  She hitched her legs around his waist, meeting his motions as an equal. They were like two puzzle pieces, meant to interlock together. 

                  She dragged her nails down his back, livid scratches emerging in her wake, sweeping her hands around so she could caress over his torso as their coupling neared its pinnacle. 

                  He altered his angle and buried deeper, moisture glistening on his skin as their exertions began to take their toll and he slowed in his pace. 

                  It was arguably the most sensual moment she’d ever experienced. She tipped her head back to admire the tempting image he made while regarding her as if she were the only person in the universe who mattered. His hair, now hopelessly tousled, fell rakishly across his forehead, and those eyes that she easily lost herself in reflected only the truest emotion. 

Nikita framed Ari’s face between her hands, love swelling to the surface as they reached their peak in unison. She stole a kiss that muffled their shared cries when that perfect moment was achieved and there was nothing left to do but fall. 

                  Cheerful sunshine wafted through the bedroom window the next morning, filtering over the lovers still fast asleep. 

                  They were understandably exhausted and still tangled up in a cuddle together beneath the sheets while they reaped the benefits of a well-earned rest. 

                  Nikita stirred first, disoriented for a moment due to her vision being out of focus, but when she realized that the events of the previous night had, in fact, happened – she beamed. 

                  With a cat-like stretch, she ducked a kiss to the center of Ari’s chest, and then made her way up, nibbling at his shoulder in an attempt to wake him, only for her phone to go off and a rather embarrassing tune to begin playing. 

                  Her lover’s gorgeous blue eyes fluttered open and then he muttered: “Why is your ring tone Bye, Bye, Bye?”

                  She wasn’t certain what was more mortifying: that he recognized the boy-band track easily enough to name it, or that she had forgotten to change the settings. 

                  “Alex was messing with me,” she groaned, swiping at the device to shut it off. 

                  They stared at each other and then began laughing as the absurdity of the situation struck them both. 

                  He greeted her properly with a kiss. “How does breakfast sound?”

                  “Breakfast sounds amazing. Better yet if it can be shared in bed.”

                  He grinned and promised her that he would keep that in mind. 

The End

[astrojulia]

Anything that makes us sick take us away from ourselves, just as said in DYLAN DOG MATER MORBI, “the first thing that the disease takes from you is your identity”. In the last year, for example, I got badly sick and had to stop everything to treat it, in that moment you would not see my aquarius energy even with a magnifying glass. When this progresses to your mental, it means that there’s a part of you that i always sick and that needs to be worked on, and when you heal your wounds you will be yourself and your sun sign again (but don’t blame yourself is some scars got left).

You've heard that words have power and that our life is governed by what goes through our mind, right? Sometimes we wish so much to be another thing that we delude ourselves! You know when we want to be part of the cool kids and change the way we are, even mocking what we once love to do? The way that popular astrology degrade some signs, I can undertand why some want to act like “this is not related to me, I’ve never lied in my whole life, Gemini always say the truth” even though.. everyone lies! Work on who you are and who you want to be, we can only be better if we know who we are now. Don’t try to be someone else.

To be born on the cusp in to be born at the beginning or end of a sign’s season (normally between day 18 - 23). When you’re on the cusp, the “intruding” sign dilutes or water down your Sun sign, so if you were born in the beginning of the Aries season you can have a finger or two in Pisces and that changes the bright red color from Aries to a more cold one.

To simplify it, your astrological signature sign is the zodiac sign that is the most unique to you. This signature summarizes the others, to find it you will the element and modality you have the most in your chart, and then see the sign that represents the element+modality combination. So, if you have Aries Sun but counting all the other planets you have a dominance in water and fixed, your signature sign is Scorpio and it may change you red tone a little.

If your Sun is in Aries, the Zodiac sign by Mars, but Venus is the dominant one in your chart, her energies of peace and harmony will overpower the competitive and fighting that Mars could give you. Dominant planets are really important in someone personality, but this is rarer because the Sun itself is an important part of knowing which is your dominant planet.

This can happen for many reasons, adoptions, people who grew up without tutor or someone older to tell them when them where born, I even saw a post of someone on internet who get confuse with the date of birth because as it was born close to Christmas, it parents celebrated on another date to be able to celebrate. Without the time of birth, it is already difficult to make a natal chart (some even say impossible), imagine without the date too.

I refuse to say "you don't believe in astrology" because astrology is not a belief… nobody says they don't believe in architecture, biology… Being critical and questioning things is great and I encourage you to do that with everything (my posts included). However, there is a big difference in having critical sense and being skeptical about a subject. Being critical is everything you see is questioned and revised, being skeptical is you will never agree with a subject because you’re sure that what you know is the only answer to that question.

Progression - Our planets do not stop in time! We learn everyday (thanks lord) about something and our planets accompanies our evolution, your Aquarius Sun can be progresses to the Pisces Sign and you can feel like you’re not so cold like you always ready about Aquarius.

Your annual chart (or Solar Return) - Every year the currently planets aspect our own aspects (natal chart) and that’s why we are a little different every year. So that’s why you can be feeling a little to much Virgo this year, but maybe the next will be Sagittarius.

Sources:

Servant of the Fates - post inspiration (When I wrote this she still hadn't reposted...)

Naiad 1/Naiad 2

Template by sorberts on tumblr

PSD by wildfireresources on deviantart

[izzyeffinhands]

The only Facebook group I feel safe in as an Izzy Hands stan is Our Flag Means Daddy.

Even though I am apart of the two main groups as well, i.e. Our Flag Means Deathposting, Our Flag Means Fans, I do NOT feel SAFE. I see the wildest and hottest fucking takes in these groups and they piss me off. Are you even watching the same show? I’m also sick and tired of people calling Izzy a villain when he clearly is not. Also there are many that don’t recognize he’s gay, even after season 2. If you voice you’re upset and betrayed? You get attacked. I was again last night.

I guess I’m a proud Izzy “apologist”, but it fucking baffles me how fans just give Ed a pass on all the brutal things he did. Oh but the love story—- NO. Recognize you’re an Ed apologist as well. I like both Ed and Izzy, but I recognize the horrifying things Ed did.

The day of the finale, I posted my thoughts on various social media. I got attacked. I got messages even on tumblr from anon cowards who I imagine followed through Twatter. I was called the t slur. That I was stupid, fat, all sorts of things.

It’s because I said I’ll never trust David Jenkins again. Now, do I have my own thoughts as to whether parts of the finale are a dream state/gravy basket that Stede himself is in? Absolutely. But let’s dive into why I was especially hurt.

First off. I am disabled. For those who know me, I’ve also had two leg surgeries and my injury has ruined my life. So seeing Izzy with a false leg, as a disabled character, still being badass? It felt good. It boosted my confidence for me to keep going. I had so much metal in my leg it caused pain that left me bedridden and using a wheelchair and cane. Many a time I wish they’d chopped my leg off.

I see a lot of myself in Izzy. I swear, he has the traits of an Aries with his anger and intense emotions. This man feels deeply for those who cares for, even though at first this seemed to just be Edward. Despite the hardened shell, he’s a romantic at heart. I’m very much the same.

That hardened shell is also a form of masking to me. In my opinion, and in my own headcanon for this roleplaying blog, Israel is neurodivergent and suffered sexual assault on ships when he was young. It’s part of the reason he has bowel issues. He had to force himself to put on that rough motherfucker mask in order to protect himself. I was bullied mercilessly in school. When I started middle school, I decided to align myself with the “bad kids” as a form of protection. Guess what? Part of myself was masking I was a bad ass, part of myself became the badass I was masking to be after years of torture.

Also. I am transmasculine. I’m pre-HRT. But to me, Izzy is very transmasc coded. This was even confirmed by Con himself when a transmasc fan at Supercon brought the conversation up. I’d just like to say again how much I adore him for supporting the trans community, particularly transmascs who often are glanced over.

Then David Jenkins, a straight man, that swore he wouldn’t fall into the kill your gays trope did exactly that. So let’s exclude here the thought that this is possibly a dream state, or even that he might be resurrected by Buttons as a zombie or ghost which I fucking hope not. We’re talking about my initial feelings. Now it felt like they were setting him up to be killed but I said oh no Jenkins wouldn’t do that to us. He promised he wouldn’t.

Guess what?! He fucking did. Not only that, he murdered off the disabled, gay, transmasc coded character after giving him the most beautiful character arc of any character on the show. You can have a gay pirate rom com, you can understand some characters can get hurt, but killing someone as a means to advance plot? Fuck you. Also, the fact that Izzy apologized to his ABUSER?! As if the victim blaming and shaming wasn’t enough for Izzy Hands, which I see plenty of still, that’s fucked up on so many levels.

So to me I watched a version of myself be murdered. It hit me in the hardest way imaginable. I cried for days. I’ve never been so attached to a character in my 38 years of existence. I’m sick and tired of people saying they like his redemption arc. Izzy never needed redemption. He just needed one, single, person to tell him that he was loved and cared about.

So voicing that I felt betrayed and that I no longer trust Jenkins got me nothing but vitriol. Then toward the end of the day, he made a tweet about how there’s no version of the show without Izzy and had the comments turned off. He knows what he did. And then in the FB groups, if you dared say you were upset that day, requoted Jenkins, you’re a horrible person? Right. I didn’t start attacking the writers. I just said I’m betrayed and I can’t trust what I thought was my comfort show. Because of that, I got hate.

As much as I’d like to believe Izzy will return, the interviews David has done post season 2 talking about his character give me little hope. It’s like he just stabbed every fan in the back. Id like to think the rushed finale is really a dream sequence or gravy basket deal. Id like to think that Izzy will come back thanks to Buttons. But now I just don’t trust David Jenkins.

And if you dare voice this opinion anywhere but Our Flag Means Daddy and Twatter, you get attacked. So here goes. Thanks for my TED talk.

[neatfrog]

~Notes~

~occasional 18+ content 🔞🔞

~queer faggot 🌈

~current things I can’t shut the fuck up about: hazbin hotel/helluva boss, fallout, venom (coming soon)

~my art tag here !

~currently taking commissions ✨

~About~

~you can call me kitchie (pronounced like ‘kicsi’ in Hungarian - it’s a joke bc kicsi means small and I’m 4’11”)

~you might have once known me as venomtots

~3 decades alive on this wretched planet

~married to someone I met on tumblr (follow ur dreams, kids)

~I enjoy cats and languages

~I draw (if the brain worms let me), and am capable of writing but haven’t actually done so in years. my white whale is the venom fanfic from 2018 that I still haven’t finished

~I’m autistic and have adhd so if I do something weird pls just blame it on that

~I’m not kidding when I say I’m obsessed with languages, it’s my special interest since I was like 7

~fluent - English and French

~advanced - Hungarian

~also OK - Norwegian, Spanish (Mexico), German, Japanese, Chinese (Mandarin)

~can’t speak/write but can read sorta well enough: Brazilian Portuguese, Dutch, Danish, Swedish, Finnish (the only words I know are probably all from Antti Tuisku songs)

.

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The rest is just my likes and shit, no obligation to read

~Likes~

video games

favs: Fallout, Baldur’s Gate 3, The Outer Worlds, Rule of Rose, Clocktower, ReMothered, Visage, The Evil Within, Resident Evil, the Dark Pictures series - most survival horror/horror in general.

I’ll admit that I often don’t have the patience for the horror games where you have to be all sneaky and try to find things & escape while constantly being chased, but I still really love those kinds of games and wish I had the patience to play them, so I’ll usually just watch a let’s play

I’m also a slut for some Mario Party, and my adhd ass can sit and play shit like Powerwash Simulator or House Flipper for hours

books/comics

horror/thriller/mystery mostly, but if it sounds interesting I’ll read whatever. we have several shelves of Stephen King books

favs: The Walking Dead, Venom, GoT, A Series of Unfortunate Events, The Hollow Kingdom Trilogy, The Hunger Games

I still read manga occasionally (FMA will always be my #1 favorite)

movies

horror (any kind), foreign films, indie, comedy - again, if it sounds interesting and I’m in the mood then anything is cool. if you like horror and haven’t watched any Asian horror films, you definitely should do that

series/franchises that could be releasing their 20-quillionth remake/sequel and I would still be going to see it: saw, the purge, friday the 13th, scream, nightmare on elm st, VHS, Killjoy, Terrifier

ok I’d probably watch any Hunger Games movie too tbh

and literally anything ari aster does, I know that man’s some kinda fucked up but damn does he make some Movies

also Tubi has some really awesome shit on there, definitely worth checking out

I found Liza a rókatündér (Liza the Fox Fairy) on there and it’s now one of my all-time favorite movies

tv shows

favs: Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss, Fallout, The Walking Dead, The Boys/Gen V, IWTV, Resident Alien, Hannibal, Ted Lasso, Disenchantment, Paradise PD/Farzar, WWDITS, GoT (minus s8), Supernatural (stopped around s14 and then they did That Thing at the end so it’s more of an old fav now)

I love Scandinavian crime thrillers/dramas 🤣

when starting a series it’s honestly whatever my spouse and I decide we feel like watching at the time. I usually prefer comedy or horror, but we’ve been known to watch other things

I’ll admit I’m also a sucker for crime shows like CSI, I had season 3 on dvd as a kid and rewatched it all the time. I used to watch it and Criminal Minds with my parents so it’s kind of nostalgic cause it’s like one of the few things we all did together

(I used to be into anime but I haven’t really been feeling it for a while. My first anime was InuYasha (still holds a special place in my heart). My all-time favorite is Fullmetal Alchemist, and I enjoyed Death Note and JJBA a feral normal amount. Black Butler was also 👌🏻 and I still need to finish the manga)

music

90% of the music I listen to isn’t in English. I don’t really need to understand the lyrics, I just like how it sounds. It does end up being funny sometimes though when you find out you’ve been bopping it to a song that’s repeatedly calling someone’s mom a whore

Most Listened: Antti Tuisku, Apulanta, Evelina, Szakács Gergő, ByeAlex, Intim Torna Illegál, Leander Kills, Dubioza, KYO, Stromae, Siri Nilsen - etc (Linkin Park is still an all-time favorite as far as American music goes)

I admit I’ve been obsessed with the hazbin hotel soundtrack lately

ok I won’t say no to the occasional k-pop or j-rock song (I used to be Obsessed lol)

that said I’ll listen to literally anything if it sounds good (nice beats make brain go brrr). only genre I actively dislike is post-9/11 country music

~Dislikes~

spiders (i’m sorry lil dudes ur rly cool y’all just irrationally scare me), making phone calls, unwarranted rudeness

[adrienneryatt]

And by now I don't need no help to be destructive I've been gone Yeah, I've been on this road too long

►GENERAL INFORMATION

FULL NAME: Adrienne Layla Ryatt NICKNAME(S): Jynx, Adri, Riot LABEL: The Mystic AGE: 32 DATE OF BIRTH: October 31, 1991 ZODIAC: Scorpio Sun, Aries Rising, Capricorn Moon GENDER & PRONOUNS: Female; She/Her HERITAGE: French, Mexican, Italian SPOKEN LANGUAGE(S): English, Spanish, Italian OCCUPATION: Occult Specialist/Demonologist SEXUALITY & ROMANCE: Bisexual; Biromantic PET(S): Doberman named Khaos & a black cat named Hekate

► APPEARANCE

FACE CLAIM: Seychelle Gabriel HEIGHT: 5'2" WEIGHT: 112 lbs. DOMINANT HAND: Left HAIR COLOR: Brunette EYE COLOR: Brown SCARS: None notable. TATTOOS: None.

►PERSONALITY

POSITIVE TRAITS: Clever, Dauntless, Beguiling, Open-Minded, Authentic, Prophetic. NEGATIVE TRAITS: Sarcastic, Intangible, Arrogant, Sycophantic, Self-Sabotaging. LIKES: Stargazing, burning candles/incense, thunder storms, music on vinyl, horror movie marathons, deep conversations with strangers, solving a problem before everyone else, eureka moments when researching, conducting tarot card readings, making intention jars/journaling, cooking. DISLIKES: Being the scapegoat, people who think they are smarter than her or belittle her, critics/cynics.

►MENTALITY

PHOBIAS: Nyctophobia DISORDERS: Not diagnosed. ALLERGIES: Seasonal (Pollen)

►BACKGROUND

HOMETOWN: Danvers, MA CURRENT RESIDENCE: Merrock, ME EDUCATION LEVEL: MA in Magic and Occult Science at Salem State University FAMILIAL CONNECTIONS: - Reina Ryatt - 55, Mother, Not In Contact - Sylvester Ryatt - 54, Father, Deceased

►FAVORITES

FOOD: Mushroom Gnocchi DRINK: London Fog MOVIE: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, Practical Magic, Scream TV SHOW: Criminal Minds, Rick & Morty, Goosebumps BAND/ARTIST: The Killers, Lana Del Rey, Nirvana, Fleetwood Mac SONG: Lilith - Halsey

► EXTRA INFORMATION

JUNG TYPE: ENTP ENNEAGRAM: The Free Spirit (4w5) TEMPERAMENT: Choleric MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Neutral SIN: Wrath VIRTUE: Temperance ELEMENT: Fire CHARACTER PLAYLIST

I just fuck things up, if you noticed Have you noticed? Tell me have you noticed?

► BIOGRAPHY

TW; Religion mention, funeral mention

It was raining when Adrienne was born. Maybe that was the first tell of the path she would be walking. Or, maybe it was the intention of her given name; Adrienne: dark woman or dark waters. There was some odd fascination with the darker things in life. Growing up attending more funerals than weddings, can anyone really blame her on that impact? Though, her nickname was Jynx due to the chaos that would spiral in her presence. For instance, her grandmother's ashes going missing when they were addressed to her apartment, or traveling all the way to California just for a once in a lifetime storm to be passing through and the festival being cancelled, or every color she calls for Roulette being the wrong one and her friend then going into the negatives with funds. Though she was labeled as an outcast and was seen as the black sheep in the family because of this, she still had something about her that drew people in. She had a great group of friends, and her fair share of experimental relationships. In short: she didn't miss anything, but she wouldn't have cared if she did. Her aunt was the one who taught her about spirituality after Adrienne had a paranormal experience at the age of 5. Whilst being in a Catholic household, Adrienne and her aunt would often sneak in order to practice their own eclectic belief. Magic, tarot cards, seances, you name it - Adrienne has dabbled in it. What no one was expecting was for her to make a career move out of it. It started in high school, she helped assist her teacher in their paranormal investigation group. It was through this teacher that she learned about anomalies and the role of the paranormal in anthropology. Her job as an investigator was just the groundwork for her BA in Parapsychology with a minor in Religious Studies at Stockton Univeristy, where she studied the connections of the paranormal and demons with the human psyche. She then went on to gain her MA in Magick and Occult Science with a specialization in Women and Minority Studies where she learned more about the occult across various religions and cultures as well as witchcraft and the impact and power women have within interaction, at Salem State University. At this point in her career, she can be seen as an expert in the occult as well as a demonologist. She actually works alongside various religious institutions, is still a researcher for a paranormal investigation team, and is also hosts a podcast about horror movies, the paranormal and the occult.

► PERSONALITY (DEEP DIVE)

Adrienne is one of those people who can attract and attract and attract, but still feel alone underneath the surface. She can be sarcastic and condescending if someone asks a question she deems as 'stupid'. She's known to bully as her type of flirting. She's actually not online, and prefers it that way. She's clever and witty and goes on passion-dump sprees about her line of work and conspiracies pretty often, or about her research or podcast. She loves people who have a sense of humor and can dish it back out to her. Adrienne used to not like being seen as a Jynx, but now she is sorta indifferent. She just knows something bad or weird is bound to happen when she's around, and it's just within her chaotic state of being. She used to be deathly afraid of the dark, mostly because she didn't know what was in it. It's still a fear, but she works through it due to her career. Adrienne comes across as intimidating and mean cause of her resting bitch face. This is partly true; seeing that she does bring hell to people and her wrath can be intense. But, if you're on her good side you have a very loyal and fun friend in your corner.

[x-akari-xv]

I ASKED GOD TO HELP ME GROW -

And it started to rain

Marami siguro sa atin ang nakapag hingi ng ganitong klaseng tulong kay Lord.

Lalo na sa lahat ng aspeto sa buhay natin. Marami kasing kailangang baguhin. Kaya naniniwala talaga ako sa sinasabi nilang mahirap maging Christian. Kasi you will live a life full of surrender at marami kang kailangan i-sacrifice.

Growing is actually painful. Akala ko dati kapag lumalago ka parang ano lang "glow-up" physical, tipong cute ka dati tapos model ka na ngayon. Akala ko din kapag growing tumatangkad ka lang eh, kaya minsan naiisip ko, nag go-grow kaya ako eh 'yung height ko nung 12 ako height ko pa rin ngayon na almost 21 na ako eme lang.

I believe na kapag may growing season may pruning season din. May mga aalisin ang Lord sa buhay natin for us to grow: either your dreams, job, friends or loved ones - na mag aayos sa character natin, sa puso natin pati narin sa pakikitungo natin sa iba.

Ang bulaklak ba lumalago kapag hindi nadidiligan? Syempre hindi, para maging maganda ang bulaklak kailangan ng daily source of water, sunlight and care. And katulad mo, kailangan mo rin ng daily source of strength, love and grace.

Strength to continue the fight

Love to present to the people around you and

Grace to extend to the people who hurt you

At makukuha mo ang source na 'yon sa Someone that is perfect - Jesus. You can always run to Him lalo na kapag pakiramdam mo ubos na ubos ka na.

Masasabing nag go-grow ka kapag kaya mo nang mahalin yung mga pangit na ugali ng pamilya mo. Kapag kaya mo na tanggapin ang mga pag kakamali mo. At mas lalong kapag kaya mo ng hindi mag panggap na malakas ka sa mga oras na talagang mahina ka.

At mas naniniwala akong there is growth in every rain.

Hindi naman sayang lahat ng pinag dadaanan natin. Yung mga struggles na akala natin, hangganan na - may breakthrough pa pala. Because the Lord can do so much more in our painful season.

Isa sa pinaka natutunan ko in serving the Lord ay ang tinuro sa akin ng isa sa mga leader ko. Malalaman mong nag go-grow ka kapag may natututunan ka sa ginagawa mo. Payag ka bang you're stuck on a place na hindi mo ikalalago? Kahit anong galing o talino mo, kung hindi ka natututo, wala ring saysay.

Naalala ko yung sinabi ni Job sa chapter 2 verse 10 "when God send us something good we welcome it, but how can we complain when he send us troubles?"

That's when the time that he is tested for being the good servant of God. Tipong, namatay ang mga angkan niya, nawala ang mga ari-arian niya, nagka-sakit siya, pero at the end of the day - he never blame God for what happened.

And yes, growth starts when we accept those rains or troubles: failures, rejections, disappointments, regrets and sins. Hindi naman kasi kahinaan kung aaminin natin na nanghihina tayo.

Also growth flows after faithfulness hindi mo lang alam na yung pag papatuloy mo sa ministry mo ay part ng faithfulness mo kay Lord.

Yung pag obey mo sa parents mo kahit nasasaktan ka na

Yung pag yes mo sa mga commitment mo kahit napapagod ka na

Yung pag aaral mo ng mabuti

That's count as your faithfulness to the Lord. And surely, it will never be in vain.

So today i challenge you, try to welcome those rains or troubles. And i tell you, mas makikilala mo ang Panginoon - on how He works the impossible to possible things.

And when you pass through deep waters surely He is with you. Magugulat ka na lang, hindi ka na nasasaktan kasi sigurado kang the Lord got you.

Nag sisimula talaga ang growth kapag may pinagdadaan ka lalo na kung may natututunan ka.

At proud ako sa mga small faithfull steps mo. Tama 'yan, lakaran mo lang. Daanan mo lang. Hindi naman habang buhay talo ka.

[kdramaqween]

Crazy Theory - Tale of the Nine Tailed

A thought suddenly occurred to me the other day and it's been playing around in my mind. Bear with me here.

What if... in the Season 2 finale / cliffhanger for Season 3

When Lee Yeon finally manages to get back from 1938 with his brother, he overshoots the year and ends up going to the future, where he meets his teenage daughter.

Lee Ari

Unbeknownst to either Lee Yeon or Ji Ah, she was pregnant when he traveled back in time.

His daughter grew up a fatherless half-gumiho and has a grudge against her father for abandoning her - just like Lee Rang.

"You weren't here when I needed you. I don't need you anymore."

Yeon is heartbroken when he finds out that Ji Ah was killed by a supernatural creature when their daughter was only a little girl. Ari blames herself for not being strong enough to save her mother and Lee Yeon for never being there for them.

"When I was little, I had all these images of you in my mind. Mom used to talk about you all the time." The mood turns sour. "But after she was gone, do you know what I remembered? You not being there."

Out of spite, Ari never calls him Appa (Dad), or even Father, but instead calls him simply by Lee Yeon-nim. Only as the relationship progresses and she's faced with losing the father she'd just found, she then calls him Appa, much to Yeon's utter delight.

Rang takes up the role of the protective uncle and is the one explaining his own complicated relatinship with his brother, and showing to his niece that her father truly loves her and would never have abandoned her if he'd had a choice. Ari and Uncle Rang are really similar in personality and bond very easily.

Yeon, Ari, and Rang have to work together and find a way to back in time and save Ji Ah. They go through many adventures together and face many dangers as the Season progresses. The Lee brothers teach Ari how to improve her fighting skills.

During their time together, Yeon and Ari find common ground. They share a love for Toy Story 3 and Mint-Choco ice cream.

At the end of the season, they eventually manage to get Yeon and Rang back to their own timeline, but Ari isn't able to stay because she already exists there - in her mother's womb.

Father and daughter say goodbye tearfully before she vanishes. Yeon vows to be the best father in the world.

I will always be there, Ari-ah. I promise.

Flashforward: Yeon smiles, holding his newborn daughter, remembering just how beautiful and wonderful and tenacious she is going to be.

I love you, Ari-ah.

[patrivan-feels]

I don't know about you, but I already heavily disliked Ivan last season, but I thought that they might redeem him this season, only to have the writers make him ten times worse. I went from heavily disliking the character despite finding him interesting, to thinking him a despicable guy. In only the first episode I could not believe the amount of red flags coming from him, the gaslighting, the guilt-tripping of Patrick (kissing Isadora and then getting pissed at Patrick for being kissed by Cruz), etc. During their few ''cute'' moments I was rolling my eyes and I just felt viscerally disgusted during many Ivan related scenes (f*cking Ari, the gay orgy, almost blaming Patrick for his father's death, his crocodile tears scenes, etc.). He was a horrible person this season and a text book abuser towards Patrick, even if it was ''only'' emotionally. The whole relationship this season was toxic and abusive from start to finish, and I also could not stomach how much a doormat Patrick was, giving Ivan chance after chance and holding onto the guy even after Ivan literally cheated on him WITH HIS OWN TWIN. When I finished skimming the season I felt revolted and sad at the same time, which is literally the first time that's ever happened to me after watching a tv show. I was expecting nothing and I was still left disappointed. Sorry about the rant, but I had to let it out somewhere. What's your take on the trainwreck that was this season?

I'm still too sad and disappointed to properly talk about that stupid season. It broke my heart

[nord-sud-axis]

Personal astrology warning long

I have five planets in cap in the 5th house of creativity fun play pleasure children. It’s leo energy. Body-wise it represents the heart

The only issue I had as an infant was a heart murmur

I was also impatient Aries moon/sn/saturn 8th house and was kicking my moms belly inside the womb cause I was impatient

Also as an 8th house moon Ive loved the occult from a young age

I also have a relatively weak or odd immune system and am prone to emotional related illnesses and love weird health treatments and tend to try newer ones ahead of the so-called collective (aqua in uranus in the 6th house)

Prone to Mental scars (Chiron in Scorpio in the 3rd). Made me not want to share poetry anymore. Love for brevity with big emotional and ideas: cap venus on a stellium

When Pluto was in cap I felt very self protective with good reason because the energy around me felt scary and I dealt w a lot of betrayals esp because the Pluto energy activated just about every placement of mine beginning with Pluto in sag in the 4th house. And pluto deposited on my 11th house from my Aries moon-Saturn

With Pluto in aqua opposite my 12th house leo (I have leo Lilith) I feel way more free to be social and that reciprocity is finally allowed and my interests being valued in a way that they can fit into my life and daily routine in a powerful way (6th house Uranus conjunct Pluto transit)

Leo season this year when Pluto was in aqua activated my 12th house Lilith plus my cap stellium deposited there and I felt like I was going thru psychosis for a moment

I am also thinking more deeply around alternative health methods and futurity

Left and right. The 3rd day of Pluto in aqua my friend (aqua rising) was Iistening w interest to what I had to say for like 3+ hours. Previously when I have vibed with someone they moved away within under a month and/or their mental health caused them to leave my life abruptly (Aries moon overlapping Saturn in the 8th desposited empty 11th house of friendship in cancer during both Pluto in cap and Pluto in sag with an influence of aqua Uranus). Pluto in sag=bad luck this and Aries = self/action 8th = power struggles inherited energy destruction aqua = alientation social circles uranus = weird situations and abrupt change

For the past two days ppl have been acting weird towards me (verbally) I don’t know why like putting more blame on me then is necessary and then retracting it and admitting some fault. I think this is because people (including myself) are being called to change internally related to matters of social responsibility. The three that have been acting weird or off balance around justice and social contracts either had an aqua stellium or aqua Saturn.

This uranus transit will likely be prominent in my life (0 orb sag Pluto sextile Uranus in aqua)and subsection of people of my generation (gen z) because they have uranus sextile Pluto or uranus trine Pluto. This will also rly affect ppl in the usa because us is a sag rising aqua moon

As a Virgo rising I’m analytical like synthesis details/anecdotes being useful and caring for ones heallth

I’m absolutely astonished as to the repetitive thoughts and situations right before Pluto went into aqua for the rest of my lifetime foreshadowed these changes

Last but not least as a Libra mars and nn second house my perception of myself now is that I want a bunch of friends and to exchange ideas and bring dreams into reality and have control over my time but I’m also okay to detach from that for the greater good

I also like talking about and thinking about aesthetics and am driven by beauty harmony w a bit of playful chaos

I’m also only motivated by group activities and can be way too nosy (Libra mars) and desire truth from people

I reject emotions for control and sensuality is second to control and ideals but I’m would like to change that

Edit if I had control over the world I’d love it to move faster but at the same time there are always changes happening all the time that may not be visible…