#i based the class assignments more on stats than personality
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and then i drew more ocs in tf2 . my Brain is Rotting
i am putting all my clowns on the red team and all my jesters on the blue team . they are ENEMIES
#at worlds end comic#tf2#team fortress 2#oc#original character#doodles#all the other guys i drew in the last post r on the red team#tf2 pyro#tf2 heavy#tf2 spy#i based the class assignments more on stats than personality#that being said loon would be a horrible spy
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hey! i’m thinking of switching my major to stats this upcoming semester. just had a few questions for you if you don’t mind!
is statistics really hard? how much time do you spend studying on the daily or weekly to maintain good grades? any tips on succeeding?
thank you !
Sorry for the delay in response!
Firstly, I’ll say it’s a hard degree, but I don’t think it’s not doable. The difficulty comes from the academic rigor- think of it like a math degree but with a focus on a specific discipline of math. If you’re naturally gifted at math it’ll be much easier for you, but if you’re like me, you’ll have to put in some effort. There’s also a component of creative thinking to a stats degree; my professor once told me that it’s not the actual mechanics that we struggle with learning, but the application of the mechanics to new problems that don’t have a stepwise process to complete. I think that’s where the real difficulty comes in with this degree for everyone. That being said, it forces you to think outside the box and with more critical analysis skills than you’ve ever done before, and I love it. I’ve grown so much not only as a student, but in my professional and even personal life because you learn to have an open mind and to think of multiple perspectives when approaching various issues. Many people in my major feel the same! The pain is totally worth it lol.
Studying can be hit or miss for me. My statistical coding courses don’t take me too long, I think the longest I’ve ever spent on a coding assignment was 4 hours and there’s not much studying involved with coding. If I study for these courses, it’s usually just practicing the code we learned in class to other problems. My math based stat courses definitely take more time, and for most people in my major as well. I’d usually spend somewhere between 10-15 hours on the weekly homework, 20-25 hours on take home exams, and I’d spend about an hour a week reviewing distributional results. Memorization helps with a stats degree, but a lot of your studying will be application based and doing practice problems.
My biggest tip for succeeding is do not get discouraged! This is a hard degree no doubt, and at times everyone feels incompetent and like they’re not good enough. You are certainly good enough, you just need to give yourself some grace and some space to grow. The difficulty also fosters a lot of camaraderie among the people in my major, so certainly reach out to the other stats students to not only feel supported but to support others!
My biggest practical studying tip is focus on applying concepts as opposed to memorizing concepts. Memorization helps with distributional results, but the real learning comes from completing the rigorous practice problems. Additionally, I would recommend taking a proofs writing math course at some point in time. It really helps when you get to upper level stat courses. I’d be happy to give you some resources if you feel like personally reaching out! My professors in the stats department believe in open access to education so most of our textbooks and our professors’ notes are free online for anyone to view :)
I believe in you if this is the path you choose! It will certainly be rewarding✨
#studyblr#studyspo#study#academia#study motivation#statistics major#statistics#uni student#uni studyspo#uni studyblr#uni struggles#uni stuff#college stress#college studyspo#college studyblr#college studies#college stuff#college student#study advice
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FAQ
(will be updated as time goes on)
What is this being written on?
ChoiceScript. I would try Twine, but my other game has a nice steady base on ChoiceScript, and I'd rather not move it over.
Can I make fanfic/art/etc? Can I show you my MC/fanfic/art/etc?
Yes! Please do! I welcome it wholeheartedly!
Do you have a patreon or ko-fi?
No, not as of right now. This will change later.
Is the rating 18+?
Yes. I'd say I believe the minimum age would be 17+, due to sexual content that can be fade to black.
Note: All sex scenes will be fade to black on the public demo. A private demo will be available for patreon or ko-fi donators when we get there which will include the explicit scene option (think ao3) and the "lite" version (think published smut).
How is the story formatted?
It will play out similarly to a dating sim/otome game. There will be 1-2 common starting chapters and then it will branch out into 6 routes for the ROs. All routes will have the same 6 key plot events, but will be different in how they're approached.
How many endings are there?
At least 6?
The endings will scale off of how many main events you succeeded in and the selected RO's relationship towards you. That means if you have a high relationship with your RO but have done poorly with the main events, you can still achieve a good ending.
Are there any poly routes?
Not as of right now. The coding for poly relationships is a bit too complicated for me to do right now. This may change as I get more comfortable with it.
Does MC have to romance someone?
Yes, that's the point of the whole game/story.
What are the characters ethnicities? Are they Chinese?
The world of Nian is heavily inspired by China and the Tang Dynasty, so the characters would be Chinese, but I don't assign real ethnicities onto them.
This isn't historically accurate!
I know. That's why I said it's inspired by China, fantasy period C-Dramas, fantasy period pieces, and romance manhwa/manhua.
How does magic work in this world?
As of right now, I don't have a lore post about magic, so here's a quick breakdown.
Everyone can use magic. Some people have Magic Aptitude, which means they have more ability than most people. Magic is classified into Elemental Type and Class.
Will XYZ be in the story?
Maybe. This is a WIP so it's possible.
How are WLW/MLM/Queer relationships viewed/treated in the story?
They're fine. No one is homophobic.
How are women viewed/treated in the story?
Everything is mostly viewed about the same, as in it's pretty much equal for a majority of people. But a few things have lingered on from tradition (i.e boys inherit over girls, etc).
Help! I can't pronounce the names!
I provide helpful pronunciations for the characters' names on the Side Characters page. There will also be pronunciations listed in the stat page of the game.
How are the names written?
All names are written in the LastName FirstName format.
If I write something like "Consort Huo", it's the equivalent of "Mr Smith". For those who understand, the last names are monosyllabic while the first names are disyllabic.
Does MC have a set name?
MC has a set last name (Nan), but not a first name. You can name your MC whatever you'd like.
I encourage using a disyllabic name, for immersion and the fact that it would be the most "accurate". I provide 3 examples of disyllabic names in the game, but you can ultimately name your MC whatever you want!
Can you help me pick a name?
I certainly can! Just send me a private message (not an ask) with the name of your MC, and I'll find a name similar in meaning or pronunciation. Please be sure to tell me which you want, similar meaning or similar pronunciation.
Does MC have a set personality?
A bit, although it's more traits, as of right now. They will never want the throne, they are a good sibling to their siblings, they enjoy social events, and they are well-educated and a little bit naive from their position.
Does MC have a set appearance?
No. MC's appearance is up to you.
Can MC be trans?
I'm planning on it. There won't be any references made to a transition, though, and it won't affect anything besides the sex scenes. You'll have an option at the first sex scene to set what your MC has.
Will MC become the ruler? Can MC overthrow their father/brother? Can MC hurt *insert person here*?
No. Male MC is 4th in the line of succession and Female MC is 14th in the line of succession. MC loves their family and would do nothing to hurt them. MC will not perpetrate any kind of excessive violence against anyone.
Does MC have magic? Can MC do magic?
As mentioned before, everyone has magic. MC does not have Magic Aptitude, however, so their magic is on a normal level.
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LTB Tav Tuesdays: Drem Sion, the Relentless Defender
My third Tav is based on the first character I ever made for D&D 2e circa 1991, so he's a bit unique—a blend of several characters I found compelling as a tween and teen in the late '80s/early '90s. I lifted his name from the young protagonist of Warrior Scarlet, Rosemary Sutcliff's 1958 story about a Celtic boy in pre-Roman Britain, but as a grown-up martial artist my Drem is not a wee kid.
His look and demeanor is a combination of the monk/master character from Final Fantasy I (floppy dark hair, blue robes) with Donatello the Ninja Turtle (a clever, focused, disciplined, staff-wielding thinker). So the (arguably rightfully much-derided) monk clothes actually work well for his look. I wish I still had his 2e stat block with the Shadowdark-like sketch-portrait I made, but that's long lost. These days I think he holds up as the bare bones of a character, so filling the gaps in 5e and BG3 has been fun.
I'll keep Drem's rather convoluted 5e backstory-bio super-short compared to previous Tavs, because he's actually got two: as a PC in my brother's homebrew campaign, and as an NPC in my own campaign. As a PC, he's less of an austere monk and more of a brawler/pugilist/enforcer for Guild-type organizations (the 5e "monk" is such a janky idea that I've ended up using it less for flavor and more for mechanics).
As an NPC, he was sort of a Jaheira/Minsc-like folk hero from a century prior, but when encountered by my players he was most definitely (and unwillingly) undead; indeed the subplot of that particular adventure was to help him find his final peace, because his ashes also unlocked a particular macguffin. It seemed a fitting way to send off my original character and put my own 2e era to rest.
In BG3 Drem is probably the most "moral" character I'll be playing (criminal background and shadow subclass notwithstanding), and to date he's one of my least-progressed playthroughs, because it's taken me a while to get the hang of the Monk as a class. However, post-Patch 5 he's gone well: being "good" enough to romance Karlach (and only Karlach) and be Wyll's best bro, while deftly playing off the whims of more ambitious/ambivalent companions like Astarion or Gale, and doing his unarmed-fighting best to keep on Lae'zel's good side.
I'm not sure how his run will end up—as of right now he's made it as far as Karlach's dinner date in Act 3—but RP-wise I'm confident he'll do the right things in crunch time. For better or worse that's what folk heroes do, right? At the very least I've gotta go back and replay him to get better screen shots, because I find the "standard stoic Tav" poses sorely lacking, personality-wise. For a less-developed character like this who's more a cipher than many of the others, that's a problem, even if he is my "oldest" character overall.
His in-universe homebrew bio goes like this:
"A Kalen warrior-monk and legendary folk hero, Drem looms large in local tales of the early Ryvellian Era, mentioned frequently in Volumes 6-9 of "The Urgent Chronicles" purporting to document that time. Born circa 403 AD in the Krettan town of Caerdeva outside Scarnasa, Drem escaped what’s described as a chaotic childhood to become a student of ancient Anuelidathi unarmed defense at a young age. Taking up with the Unseen as a young man, Drem led a life of adventure with his elven companions Slie Senescha and Qaminyo Lythar, basing themselves in Dramdoc and eventually allying with the Amrysii to help restore House Luradh to the Kalen throne in 426 AD."
"Retained by King Amrys, enviously spurned by his successor Cafnys, and returned to prominence by Cafnys’ son Ryvell, Drem and his friends defended the Kalen High Kingdom against Vaali invaders via espionage and dirty tricks, which Ryvell’s honor prevented him from doing directly. Eventually such assignments proved to be Drem’s undoing, for after retrieving the Soul Key from Saalurun he was captured and defeated in Haervudt by his own assassination target, a renegade Broken Hand Brother named Nikolai Nisse, in 447 AD."
(Image and text from The Nua Gazetteer, Volume 1)
#ltb tav tuesdays#bg3#bg3 oc#bg3 ocs#drem the defender#bg3 monk#bg3 tav#my ocs#my bg3#baldur's gate 3#my bg3 character#my bg3 ocs#tav tuesday
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Goose Manager
Goose Manager, Etta Candy, 2020
Goose management is where you remove geese from someone's property without killing them. It's a real thing. If you haven't heard of Untitled Goose Game, well, that seems unlikely but go watch like 5 minutes of gameplay footage. It'll help you understand why geese need to be managed.
Or you could just walk by some geese and find out firsthand.
Anyway.
In Goose Manager, you play goose managers in the making - people whose job it will be to get geese (and other waterfowl) out of people's yards, barns, streets, playgrounds, elevators, national malls, supercolliders, etc. The usual spots. You pick a specialty:
A Noisemaker, focused on sneaking up close until you're ready to unleash heck.
A Trapper, who might employ have-a-heart-style traps or build sillier things like a goose catapult or a swanager.
A k-9, in which you play the person rather than the dog but still get to direct the actions of a very imposing and barky dog.
A Duck Dodger, who attracts the attention of these irate waterfowl and pulls them away from the pack without getting hurt in the process.
Niche protection is strong without being prohibitive. A k-9 character can scare away geese like the Noisemaker, but isn't going to be sneaking around. The Trapper can sneak, but their traps can only really take care of one goose at a time. There are no base stats; instead, everything is based on your skills and class.
Your characters will be assigned harder and harder missions until they finally graduate from the National Goose Management Training Academy, which is an actual thing, though I can't imagine this is how it works. Your training missions will become more and more contrived as you go along. You start out shooing a few younger ducks from a bike path, and end up having to clear hundreds of ornery swans out of the Pentagon without disrupting a Joint Chiefs of Staff meeting. It's absurd fun.
If there's one thing I can complain about here, it's that this feels more like a board game. The experience is focused to the point of not needing any elaboration. Elaboration is among the set of things that TTRPGs do well. It's still fun to add roleplaying elements to Goose Manager, but it doesn't feel like an integral part of the experience.
Etta (real name) Candy (not real name) is known for her layout-forward game designs. This one is no exception, with beautiful spreads carefully typeset on the wings of thresholded birds. It's a great effect that clearly took a lot of work. Etta prefers to make only physical copies, so pick one up from her on the con circuit if you're interested.
#ttrpg#imaginary#indie ttrpg#rpg#peace was never an option#if you're a goose manager manager it means you train goose managers
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Tie between: (with a read-more break because oops this got long)
a animal science class about herd management/breeding goals. We were each given a herd of electronic milk cows (no real cows were hurt in the production of this class :D) and a few bulls with the stats for the cows direct production/milk fat%/etc and the legacy stats for the bulls. Each person was also given a goal - increase the herd's production, or increase the milk fat of the milk produced, or increase the protein - there were a bunch of metrics. Each week we had to choose which cows we would keep and breed, or cull. It was startling how fast you could get attached to cows that were basically a number and a stat list. Grades were based on success of improving your assigned metric. Sims but for cows.
a medieval science class (yeah I was STEM but there is a limit, friend) where we had three assigned papers to make up our grade - and each was a letter from some historical person, to some other historical person, about something that was happening at that time. Each of these three letters had a historical, real counterpart - if we could find that real letter, we could just submit a copy of that. I never found any of them. In lieu of finding the real thing, we had to write the letter, from the POV of the person who actually wrote it, echoing their morals, in the tone needed, and it needed to be convincing. One of the letters was from an Archbishop about why killing Joan of Arc was good, actually. SO hard, so much fun.
With an honorable mention going to: My elective animal care animal science class where I got up at unholy-early AM to go help at the sheep barn. There were baby sheep, it was unbearably cute, and I got to ride in the back of a truck throwing hay bales around. The rams were borderline terrifying though.
Second honorable mention to the other elective animal care class where I spent afternoons with the milking herd. I do not miss you, cow 666 (yes, that was her number, she was hand-raised and an absolute asshole of a cow, she taught me how to jump fences). I still think about the barn manager every time I go through a gate, thanks to his rants about Making Sure You Close And Lock The Gate Every Time OMFG Guys.
Third honorable mention to the other other elective animal care class where I spent afternoons caring for the campus bird population - I got a paying job out of that one, though I may never forgive the ducks. I did get to use a high-pressure water cleaner though, for the win.
Fourth honorable mention to the Shakespeare class in community college - the prof said she didn't give A's and I said 'bet' (not really, this was 1999, and I wasn't that cool as a teenager anyway) and proceeded to argue that Kate was better wife by the biblical model than Bianca (and she's just a more well-rounded character, sorry Bianca, but Kate's my girl). That prof had a love for Shakespeare and gave it to us (and let us watch a taped version of Sir Ian Mckellen and Dame Judi Dench in Macbeth, and took us to a live production of Taming of the Shrew).
can't do this one as a poll bc there's endless choices but if you're in college/university or went to college/university what's been the most fun/enriching class you've had?
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DL Fantasy RPG Classes Headcanons
So I actually have many DL fantasy AUs, the vast majority of which are an excuse for me to self-ship with Shin but in the process of coming up with one of them I ended up sorting all of the boys into RPG classes and I thought I might as well share it.
Quick note, this is mainly based on Pathfinder classes because that’s the fantasy system I’m most familiar with and I tried to assign every character a different class just because I think that makes things more interesting.
Shu - Summoner
Okay so I really struggled when it came to picking out a class for Shu because we know he can be good in a fight when he actually puts the effort in but getting him to put that effort in is another matter. I couldn’t really picture him as being any of the core classes for one reason or another (either because I didn’t think they suited his skillset or his personality) and after a bit of digging through more obscure classes, I eventually settled on summoner. This is because summoner’s are capable of taking down enemies, but they do so by summoning a creature they have a close bond (known as an Eidolon) which then does most of the job for them which I personally think works a lot better for Shu rather than a class with a more direct fighting style.
As a side note, Eidolon’s take on the form of some sort of fantastical creature, I personally imagine Shu’s looking like a water horse or a kelpie in it’s horse-like form
Reiji - Alchemist
So unlike with Shu, this one was super easy for me. Reiji canonically like tinkering with chemicals, in a fantasy setting that automatically makes him an alchemist. If we want to get super specific, then as you’d expect he ends up focusing on poisons, but he’s skilled in other areas of alchemy too. As a general rule however, he dislikes using mutagens (potions that let an alchemist transform into a more beast like form, upgrading their physical stats at the expense of their mental ones), and has spent years trying to find a way to make them so he can get the physical bonus without suffering any of the negative effects.
Ayato - Fighter
I went with the fighter class for Ayato because I don’t see him as being some sort of complex spellcaster who keeps their distance from a fight or any sort of support class. In a fight, Ayato’s the sort to charge in and get stuff done, which is exactly what a good fighter does, he doesn’t need anything more complicated or finickity.
Kanato - Sorcerer
I definitely didn’t want to give Kanato a strength-based class, because I while I certainly wouldn’t pick a fight with him, he’s not really in the same league as someone like Subaru. I also don’t see him as a support class and I think making him a spellcaster works well with what we see of his abilities in canon. I definitely don’t think Kanato has the temperament I would associate with a wizard so I went with the sorcerer class. For anyone who isn’t aware of the difference, wizards are ordinary people who learn magic from books while sorcerers have an innate gift with magic thanks to magical ancestry. Admittedly I was a little tempted to make Kanato a necromantic wizard because of the doll room stuff, but actually I think making him a sorcerer with the undead bloodline works just as well if not better.
Laito - Rogue who makes everyone believe he’s a bard
So for a while I was really tempted to make Laito a dual-class because I feel like he fits with some of the RPG bard stereotypes and I do like the idea of him being able to cast magical illusions (like he does in HDB if memory serves) but his cunning and manipulative abilities also made me want to make him a rogue. At the end of the day however I can’t really picture Laito taking on the role of a bard in a combat situation (or rather I can’t picture him being helpful to the party in the way a bard is usually meant to be). I can however, very much picture him being a sneaky rogue who greatly surprises all of the people he’d fooled into thinking he was a run of the mill bard when he then stabs them in kidneys and pushes them off of the nearest high object.
Subaru - Barbarian
A strength-based class with rage abilities? Say no more. But yeah, this was another easy one for me and honestly there isn’t much more I can say to justify it because I mean *gestures at the start of this paragraph*
Ruki - Investigator
I was a bit torn with Ruki because part of me wanted to make him a warlock with Karl as his patron because I love that it would mirror some of his backstory in canon but at the end of the day, I just don’t think the warlock class really suits Ruki beyond the thematics. The investigator class, on the other hand, fits him much better. It’s an intelligence-based class with a focus on deduction and strategy and I don’t think anything else could fit Ruki better than that.
Kou - An actual bard
No, I didn’t go with bard for Kou just because of the idol thing (although admittedly it might have been a factor). I mainly went with the bard class because I wanted to give Kou a class that was charisma-based (as Kou is a high charisma character if ever I’ve seen one) and also not solely focused on fighting. While Kou might have gone head to head with Subaru in More Blood, as a general rule, I don’t see him as as much of a melee fighter as some of the other characters, and I actually think he’s one of the few who works well as a support class.
Yuma - Druid
I was kind of tempted to make Yuma a barbarian and in a way I still am because he’s definitely a physical combatant but without the style of an actual fighter. However I do really like the idea of making him a class that’s connected to nature so in the end I went with druid. While druids are spellcasters, I picture him as mainly using wild shape to transform into a bear and engage in melee combat and honestly I think that fits quite well. I’m also pretty sure there is some scene somewhere that involves him manipulating plants (although I would have to go searching for it) so... druid it is.
Azusa - Monk
Okay, hear me out for a minute with this one. I had a bit of a hard time picking out a class for Azusa, as I don’t really feel like a spellcaster class quite fits him but I had a hard time picturing him as one of the more physical combat-based classes because I feel like his main skill is his pain tolerance. I settled on the monk class, however, because it lets him act as a defender without being particularly skilled with a weapon and monks get really good saving throws right off the bat (these are things that let you negate or minimise effects/damage) which I think fits Azusa’s strong points best.
Carla - Wizard
With the amount Carla uses magic in the games, even if he is also skilled with a sword, he had to be some kind of spellcaster. I ended up going with wizard because I definitely think Carla fits with the whole studious stuck-up stereotype and it gives him access to some of the best spells. Additionally it’s an intelligence-based class and I actually think the relatively low-HP works pretty well as it fits with him having a poorer constitution thanks to Endzeit.
Shin - Ranger with a wolf companion
I was initially a bit stuck for Shin because I wanted to make him a class that was centred on physical combat, because we know in canon he usually likes to fight with a sword, but I also wanted to incorporate some magical abilities in there because he does periodically use them. I briefly thought about making him a druid because it would let him keep the ability to transform into a wolf but I don’t feel like he has a strong connection with nature so that didn’t sit right with me. Then I remembered that rangers are a thing and they can have animal companions and I was instantly sold on the idea.
Rangers are martial characters and can engage in melee combat but unlike fighters they do have some spellcasting ability without any of the moral implications that might come from being a paladin and honestly I think the class fits Shin perfectly.
Kino - Warlock (technically this is the Witch class in Pathfinder but I just think Warlock sounds cooler ;-;)
I was very tempted to make Kino a sorcerer but I want to stick to my one class per boy rule to keep things interesting and after thinking about it for a while, I do really like the idea of Kino as a warlock with some sort of crow-themed patron. For one it fits with his powers coming in late in canon (i.e. as a warlock, he’d only get magic after forming a pact with his patron) and it would let him have a crow familiar, which also ties in with canon. Ultimately I just like the idea of Kino as a tricky spellcaster and I think warlock works best with that image.
Bonus:
Yui - Cleric
A character that acts mainly as a healer/support thanks to powers from the divine? Can you think of anything more suited to her? Yui is another character where I knew exactly which class I’d match her with without having to think about it too much. For me cleric Yui just works (and if you’d rather think of her taking on a combatant role, then just picture her using channel smite to literally smite down her enemies with divine power).
#headcanons#I am very far from an expert when it comes to the more obscure classes#but I tried my best#I maybe spent too much time on these explanations but never mind#I have attempted to make this so that anyone could read it but I may have to revise it at a later date#Diabolik Lovers#Shuu Sakamaki#Reiji Sakamaki#Ayato Sakamaki#Kanato Sakamaki#Laito Sakamaki#Subaru Sakamaki#Ruki Mukami#Kou Mukami#Yuma Mukami#Azusa Mukami#Carla Tsukinami#Shin Tsukinami#Kino#Yui Komori#I hate it when I have to tag this many characters ;-;#it takes so long OTL#I will proofread this again later but honestly I just really wanted to post it
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D&D Next? - What does the future hold for our beloved game?
Hullo, Gentle Readers. We are once more given the blessing of a month with an extra Monday, so I get to write a free-style article (not that the majority of my articles haven’t been a bit freestyle, lately.) With the release of the Monsters of the Multiverse book, which is supposed to be our first look at where things are going for the game’s 50th anniversary edition (Coming in 2024), I thought I would take a look through and call out some of the things that seem to be indications of the game’s future.
The first thing I can see is very reassuring. Everything looks like the game we’ve been playing since 2014. While the monster stat blocks may have changed, nothing in there looks confusing or alien. When Wizards announced they’d be releasing new books for the 50th anniversary, they’d said this wouldn’t be a full 6th edition and that you’d be able to play the game with characters and modules for the existing edition. Looking this book over, I can 100% confirm that this seems to be the case.
A look through the races section shows what we’ve known was coming. In an effort to get away from world-specific lore, they’re basically stripping out all the cultural elements from each race stat block. They’re also guiding the lore of some races away from what they’ve been in the past to fit some of the new lore the game is introducing as base race lore. For example, goblins, hobgoblins, and bugbears are all tied to the Feywild now, and they share the Fey Ancestry trait with elves and eladrin.
This has some positive results. For one thing, the removal of the specific ability score modifiers gives a player a chance to play whatever they want. Maybe you don’t want your orc to be extra-strong; maybe you want to play a bookish orc, or one who’s scrawny next to the average member of his race. Taking that element away and allowing you to customize your ability scores the way you want lets you play the character you have in mind.
It also theoretically takes away the feeling some players have that you “must” play a member of a certain race if you’re playing a certain class, because you wanted to maximize the abilities that make for a more optimized version of your stats. No more will people turn up their noses at the idea of playing a dwarf wizard, for example, as a dwarf can now have the some Intelligence bonus any other race has. I do personally wish there was just a tiny bit of guidance as to what an average member of the race looks like. Does that push things into a more generic fantasy direction? I suppose. But if the monster stat blocks for orcs are always going to feature a higher strength, I don’t think there’s any harm with saying something like, “The average orc is stronger than the average human.”
This approach also caters to the idea of a character like my friend’s bugbear barbarian, Rumford the Destroyer. He’s a bugbear who was raised by halflings as one of their own. Under the new philosophy, Rumford’s racial stats would reflect the instrinsic elements all bugbears share (size, a Fey ancestry, etc) while adding no arbitrary bugbear cultural elements. While I appreciate this attempt to make races less tied to a specific culture, it can make races seem a bit more generic in a way. I’m curious to see what, if anything, replaces things in the future like elven or dwarven weapon training.
The stat blocks display changes that I’ve been looking forward to; they are really about what’s necessary to run the creature in combat as well as tweaks to make a monster more in keeping with the Challenge Ratings they’ve been assigned. In a way, this is a step from a more 3rd edition approach (where NPCs had to be made just like a PC) to a more 4th edition approach (where NPCs had unique stat blocks and didn’t need to have every skill point and spell slot tracked), at least when it comes to something like an archdruid. The archdruid stat block in Volo’s Guide to Monsters has the entirety of an 18th level druid’s spells listed, and spells were cast just like a player druid would. The Multiverse Archdruid pares this down considerably. This archdruid is tougher, with more hit points, a much better melee attack, and an awesome ranged attack that suggests this to be a Circle of Wildfire druid. There are spells, but, rather than have every spell listed out, there are some at wills, some 3/days, and a couple of 1/days.
Now, obviously, if a DM wants to know every spell an archdruid can cast, they could certainly prep a spell list. But this makes it much easier for those times when a DM just needs a foe for the players to fight. Given how much I love to reskin monsters to my purposes, this is perfect for my approach. I could use this stat block for an archdruid, a nature spirit, or even a wizard of some kind by reflavoring things a bit.
Overall, I’m really happy with this book, and I’m content with the direction things are going. While I will miss some of the lore, it does make it easier, in some ways, for a DM to put their own unique spins on the cultures of the creatures of their world. There always seems to be that one player out there who says that, because the Player’s Handbook says that drow are written a particular way, that’s how they must be. This allows for things like Matt Mercer’s Kryn Dynasty, the scorpion-god worshiping drow of Xen’drik in Eberron, or the Aevendrow and Lorendrow mentioned in the Legend of Drizzt article WotC had on their website about a year ago. These drow have little to do with the Udadrow of Menzoberranzen, which are largely how drow are presented in the Player’s Handbook. This is certainly in line with WotC’s initiative to get away from races that are inherently evil. Now, if we could just get them to stop being so mean to gnolls!
I hope you’re excited for more D&D in the future; I know I am. D&D Direct had me clapping my hands with glee over what’s coming, and Monsters of the Multiverse assures me that, when 2024 rolls around, I won’t have to learn yet another iteration of the game. Since D&D came out in 1974, and Wizards of the Coast bought it in 1997, D&D has official now been WotC’s game for over half of its lifetime. I definitely feel like it continues to be in good hands.
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Here’s some resources to help you make text-based interactive fiction games!
Totally unprompted! There’s certainly nothing going on in a certain forum right now (or rather an on-going issue). Nope, I just thought it would be nice to share some resources. ;)
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Twine
Twine is such an easy tool to use. It uses its own scripting language Sugarcube (there’s also Harlowe and Snowman, but they don’t have the same functionality and creator support as Sugarcube does to my knowledge), Javascript, and CSS.
Twine is FREE!!!
Sugarcube literally gives you a save function (which does browser and save to desktop)!!! Be the save-hoarding goblin you were born to be!
It’s criminally easy to make games with Twine. They make it easy to make stats, relationships, and other info pages. When setting up the paths you can literally see arrows pointing where they lead, you can move passages around visually so you can group them up by chapter/scene/etc......to be fair once your game gets BIG it can get messy and confusing.
I have coding experience prior to finding Twine, but I’m absolutely certain anyone can make great games with Twine. If all your doing is making text-based ‘more story than game’ games, then you’ll be doing minimal coding (setting variables, if/else statements, using text boxes, etc) so you shouldn’t have any issues.
If you do have issues I’m 99% certain someone has had your issue before, and the answer is one google search away.
You can use Twine in your browser, just be careful to not mess with the data/cookies or you can lose your games (totally not speaking from experience)....archive your games often if you use Twine in browser. You can also download Twine, so you can use it offline!
Links:
Twine
SugarCube v2 Documentation - Your new best friend.
With the Settings API you can add a mature filter, different style themes (great for light/dark themes and color blind themes...or just different themes to look cool), difficulty settings, volume control, etc.
HiEv’s SugarCube 2 Sample Code - An ever-expanding collection of code, tips, macros, widgets. A good mix of fun and useful stuff.
^ Includes a great pronoun widget!!! To be fair it’s not the most user-friendly widget at first, especially if you aren’t a coder, but in the long run a widget like this is a great tool for customizing pronouns. It allows you to write a character in the code with one set of pronouns throughout the game ($They $are a great $person), the widget selects the correct word through an switch (aka a fancy if/else) statement when the character is assigned a pronoun......so when playing a female it would display as “She is a great girl”, a male would be “He is a great guy”, and nonbinary would be “They are a great person”. You can add neopronouns this way too!
Chapel’s custom macros - Chapel has a lot of cool macros, but a lot of them are more advanced. Very few have been useful for the kinds of games I want to make, but they may be useful for you.
r/twinegames - Twine has some older forums, which are still up (though not active) and have helpful answers on them, but the current forum is found on reddit.
w3schools - When it’s time to style your game, this will be your lifeline. Even today, like...seven years after first learning CSS I still come back to w3schools all the time. !!!Twine has funky class/id selectors for it’s built in stuff so refer back to the SugarCube Documentation!!!
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Itch.io
Itch doesn’t take ownership of your content!
It doesn’t have DRM!
You can host your games for free, paid, or free with donation.
It does take a cut of your sales “The Company shall be entitled to a share of the revenue Publishers receive from Transactions which shall be calculated on the gross revenue from the Transactions“ (I’ve seen 30% but I’ve also seen “Lets you choose what to give them” so I’m not exactly sure how much their cut is).
THERE IS NO RESTRICTION ON CONTENT ASSUMING IT’S LEGAL (though if collecting payment you may be under different restrictions per the payment provider’s policy), so please make all the twisted, dark, disturbing, and/or sexual games you want!!!
Links:
Itch.io
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r/interactivefictions
r/interactivefictions is a good place for game recs, coding/writing resources, etc.
Links:
r/interactivefictions
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Tumblr
Tumblr is...well we’re all on here so we know how tumblr is like.
Great tags to look at: #interactive fiction, #interactive novel, #interactive game, #twine game, #dev log, #IF, #if game, #upcoming game, #promo post
Tumblr is a great platform, but as every creator knows...Reblog!!! Reblog!!! Reblog!!! The lifeblood of tumblr is reblogging.
I’ve found SOOOO many games I would never have known existed through if-creator’s blogs just because they reblogged a post from another if-creator.
@interact-if and @iorifd are doing great work! They collect games, share helpful coding/writing tips, etc. Go show them some love! Interact-if runs the subreddit mentioned above, and iorifd is working on a database for visual novels and text-based games.
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IFDB (Interactive Fiction Database)
IFDB is a database for interactive fiction games. You can add new game listings, write reviews, make game polls, make game recommendation lists, etc.
IFDB seems to like their parser games (parsers being where you type in commands like “go west”, “open door”, etc).
It actually has a pretty good filter and ignore system.
Links:
IFDB
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Obviously this isn’t the end all be all of dev tools or hosting platforms for interactive fiction. Ink is a scripting tool similar to Twine I’ve only heard of recently that might be interesting to you. Ren’Py, although primarily a visual novel engine, can be used to make text-based games. The only other hosting alternative I know is DashingDon, I THINK they only host ChoiceScript games and I don’t think you can sell through them, but it’s a good place regardless.
Cheers! :D
#Game development#Interactive Fiction#IF#IF game#Twine#I want to start making games...I know the coding part...it's just the story and writing part :////#lmaoooo maybe some day#for now I will continue to enjoy IFs from the sidelines
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On one hand, yes. You can imagine these things.
LARP groups are awesome, and ‘so I can defeat my enemies!!’ is a great reason to stay fit.
And if someone could put the names of those super fun warrior routines designed around those adventures somewhere instead of just angrily saying ‘that exists in a form that I have but will not share’, that’d be amazing.
But wouldn’t LARPing be more fun if you could train with a team? Spar your enemies to build off of one another’s skills?
It’d be so fun to play DND with people instead of figurines, with each person given a ‘start objective’ at the beginning and your stats based on how often you’ve come to the gym and what your gains have been. Giant foam dice for a boss battle. Maybe have a starting class, and you can have ‘weapons’ that have particular ‘effects’. You don’t have to get your objective, personally I would just mess around and try to make other peoples tasks harder. Maybe that’d be a common objective for a chaotic neutral person!!!
That’s something I used my creativity for. That right there. Don’t discredit it just because you use your creativity in a different way to make exercise easier for you.
The only reasons I enjoy exercising is because the experience itself is already fun(swim for me) and I can do it with friends(plenty of whom don’t have the schedule space or interest). That’s only accessible during part of the year for me. And the other thing I do for exercise?
Musical theatre. I work up a sweat. I get sore running around, avoiding getting stepped on by the Giant(who is in stilts-a creativity aid) in what my school is currently working on (Robert & Hammerstein’s Cinderella). I’m a fit person, but I’m shorter than all the other guys who have one of my choreographed parts, so I have to jump in order to keep up with their cadence. Soon we’ll be in fantastic costumes built to work with what we need to do for the show. Those lifts take a good range of movement and upper body strength. Last year in Newsies I was the kid who clambered up outside of the staircases to dangle in unsafe positions. We have to be fit enough for our roles, and a lot of times rehearsal actually provides that exercise if we don’t already have the skills or exercise outside of it. they will not tell you to do lifts if you don’t have the strength. But they will help you maintain the strength if you can’t fit it into your schedule outside of rehearsals.
It’s fun. We have sets. We have costumes. We’ve got assigned props and roles(never touch another man’s prop). We’ve sure as hell got a story to tell and to follow.
And we use our imaginations. But it’s MORE fun this way. It’s MORE convincing, for both ourselves and the audience.
Let other people have fun in their lives. We want whimsy and it’s not gonna hurt you if we have it. It’s not gonna hurt us either. It’s actually going to make it easier for us to take care of ourselves.
Just because you have a workaround that you enjoy doesn’t mean it’ll work for us. And if this is more fun for the people who use it? Don’t turn into the people who make fun of role players just because they have a different set up than you.
We’re allowed to want to have fun in a different way than you.
I think there should be nerdy gyms and I’m not even joking about that.
#J me#exercise#I don’t mean any disrespect and if my tone comes off as such I’m sorry#but please don’t insult others ideas just because they want to have fun differently that you#it’s like#clue vs mystery novels vs murder mystery movie vs escape room#they’re about the same thing!!! but they’re delivered differently!!!#exercise and adventure. it’s just a different format#straight up mentioned it to my parents. one of whom wants us to get money and has a good ear for business#the other a massive nerd and quite fit for a fifty year old#and they’re keen on it!!! we will be planning meetings after the musical for us to brainstorm how to effectively implement it based on jobs#that they’ve had at a different places around#bc they’re both very ‘get in the system learn the system and leave with the system#kinda people#which. that’s how I wanna help remove capitalism so I guess I do take after them in a few ways
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silly au ideas that appeal only to me: fire emblem au for empires. no we don’t have enough characters to fill out a whole fire emblem cast. no i don’t care. anyway i’m going to assign them classes (that work like the traditional fire emblem classes work - base class that promotes to a new class using a fancy seal, not the way that three houses classes work.)
scott smajor as our lord because of his main character energies. he’s cool like hector though he’s an axe lord. when he promotes he gets weapon ranks in bow and gets a stag mount. he has an icy theme. axe lord cool lord. he gets a prf that’s like... an axe that can do magic damage with an ice flavor. i think he has like. eliwood stats. even though he’s an axe user.
jimmy is like... i think it’s funny if he starts as a trainee class, like the villager. you have to BABY this man, but once he snowballs he snowballs. so starts with terrible stats but great growths in everything. i think, like many trainees, he has several class options he can take, but i sort of feel cavalier path for him? lance user. (also in the plot i think he’s related to lizzie but didn’t get the dragon genes, because...)
lizzie can be our manakete. she can have the cool awakening design for the manakete that looks like a sea dragon, except in blue and pink. i think lizzie deserves to be able to transform into a fuck-off dragon, is all.
joel gives me myrmidon vibes for some reason? speedy sword users that crit a lot. he has a bit of that slightly mean myrmidon personality that’s classic in fire emblem too. i say this with love.
pixlriffs is... actually hard for me but i think i personally like him as a white mage/healer. he gives me healer vibes. i’m also going to be nice and say “he gets the ability to cast nosferatu as white magic even though that’s less common than the healers not being able to attack” because i think he should get offensive white magic and staves from the getgo. when he promotes he also gets anima magic.
gem is, obviously, a mage class, and probably promotes to a sage and just can cast every type of magic after promotion. of the three magic types though i feel like her initial affinity/tomes is wind. no reason i just think it fits her.
sausage strikes me as an armorknight. big armor, big defensive stats, sits on the front lines and tanks every hit... as long as it’s not magic. somehow, that feels fitting for him, alright.
fwip is a wyvern rider i think. axes and lances and a wyvern. he names the dragon something fun i think. it’s black and has red wings and gem also dotes over it, almost more than fwip does.
and pearl is a classic axe warrior! she’s got big hp, a big axe, and is willing to kick your ass for free. i think in the plot she was just a farmer who joined the gang to help with their Big Quest because she likes fighting and is better at it than basically everyone else. she promotes to something that can use several weapons, i think. that or an axe and a bow.
katherine is an archer. i have no good reason for this other than “she gives me kind of archer vibes”. i like the idea of her taking up the rear, helping all of her allies by sniping from the back. when she promotes she definitely gets a mount to become a bow knight.
joey is... another hard one. i think joey is a dark mage, uses dark magic, and would prefer not to talk about why dark magic specifically. he has kinda dark magic vibes i think. i don’t know you could convince me something different for him OR katherine i’m very undecided on them.
and lastly, shubble is our pegasus knight. she found her beloved pegasus after being the lone survivor of the destruction of her farming town by the Big Evil of whatever fire emblem plot we have going on, and bonded with it. she’s lances on pegasus-back, but she eventually gets staves and swords when she promotes to a falcon knight. she has the really good speed and kind of low attack of the pegasus knight early on but is probably like. one of the best units once you use her. because she can fly.
and those are the vibes i’m feeling so far. self-indulgent fire emblem au. yes. anyone who has other ideas about this feel free to propose things. xonorth is probably an evil dragon that scott discovers is related to him or something. or, well, maybe like in empires, the dragon wasn’t the evil, this time...
#empires smp#i'm not tagging everyone. too many#i like fire emblem a lot fire emblem class assigning everyone is fun#empires fire emblem au
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stages of love | j.jh
Pairing | jung jaehyun (nct) + female!reader Rating | M Genre + Tropes | college!au, romance (angst, fluff, smut) Warnings | explicit language, alcohol consumption, instant love?, sexual content (drunk sex, receiving and giving oral, penetration, cow girl position, nipple play), greyzone fidelity Length | 15k+
Summary | A playlist for the trials and tribulations of a beating heart
(Or; your relationship with Jung Jaehyun in ten songs.)
Note: ahhhhhhh!!!! we finally did it boisssss. this fic has been a long time coming and honestly im sick and tired of jaehyun. i’ve spent too long thinking about him for this fic smh. this is also my first time writing smut so we’ll see how that goes lmao. anyway this was a long labor of love so please let me know what you thought of it !!! <333
1. Peach by IU
smitten at first sight.
“How can I explain this feeling?”
“Alright, I think that sums up about everything we need to cover for today’s lecture. Remember, most of this will be on your final exam. Any questions before you’re all dismissed?”
Your professor looks up from the board, scans the room and all he sees are most of the students waiting with bated breath, itching to leave the class, and half of those students having already packed their belongings in anticipation. He held them back an extra twenty five minutes today, which is notably longer than previous lectures in which he delayed dismissal.
“Okay, you’re free to go. Chapters nineteen and twenty are due the next time we meet.”
You breathe out a sigh of relief, ready to head out with the rest of the class. You like Professor Jang and find that he makes history somewhat digestible, but he has a tendency to lose track of time, which is inconvenient, but more so today since you have agreed to meet up with Yeri. You glance at your phone to see text notifications and curse to yourself. You’re already ten minutes late and Yeri is many things and impatient is one of them.
You’re one of the first out of the small lecture hall and you shoot her a quick reply before making your way to the oncampus cafe. Through quickened strides and shortcuts engrained from cross-campus treks from class to class, you arrive in record time. You’re slightly out of breath and impressed by your speed, but you stop, frozen in your tracks when you see Yeri’s displeased face. You find her situated in a small, but cozy corner next to the windows, already unpacked with notebooks and papers strewn on the desk ready to review for exams. It's one of the best study spots in the cafe and you immediately know your best friend had to come extra early to nab such a sought after table.
“About time,” she scowls, “what took you so long?”
You shoot her an apologetic look, “aww, Yeri,” you pout your lips a little too dramatically, “I’m sorry. I just came from history and you know how Professor Jang is.”
Yeri looks at your jutted lips in disgust, but then her face softens in consideration. “Hm, I do know Jang.” She scrunches up her nose remembering her time in his class last semester. “That old man can talk for days on end and he never lets anyone leave class early. I guess I’ll let you go this time.”
You beam at her knowing she’s no longer angry for your tardiness. “Great, drinks are on me today. It’s the least I can do for being late.” Yeri forgives as easily and as quickly as she loses her temper. You learned this after a few weeks of being her roommate.
Yeri says nothing in silent agreement and you place your stuff down across the table next to the chair she reserves for you. You pull out your wallet and weave through the packed cafe to head to the order counter. The line is long and you patiently review the menu. Your roommate has consistent tastes and always orders a vanilla frappuccino regardless of which cafe she goes to, but you base your decision on your mood. You mull over your choices and by the time you reach the barista taking your order, you decide you’re in an ‘iced Americano’ kind of mood today. You have exams on top of exams you need to review for and a stronger caffeine kick is much needed.
After paying, you head back to the table with two drinks in tow. Yeri takes her drink and after you both take a few sips and catch up for the day, you dive straight to work. The two of you decide to review for statistics.
Between re-summarizing chapters and answering review questions, you muse to yourself about how your college experience thus far hasn't been that much different from your high school life. You didn’t necessarily hate high school, per say, but it was safe to say you didn’t enjoy it. Your heart was in the arts, specifically music, and you had found studying the core subjects to be boring and tedious. You remember being ecstatic to have been accepted and enrolled in a performing arts college, foolishly thinking your days of solving differential equations and memorizing chemical formulas were over. You specifically remember daydreaming of your hours being filled with keyboard practice and composition notes and only such things. Somehow the reality of mandatory general education courses slipped your mind when you constructed such fantasies.
Despite frivolous and preconceived notions of college, you have already survived a semester and you are nearly through your second.
“Hey, do you remember when this stats assignment is due?” Yeri’s inquiring voice snaps you out of your brief reverie and you search your cluttered brain for a date.
“Uh, I think it’s due, like, a few days before the final, but I’d have to double check.”
Yeri nods. “Alright, well let’s take a small break. We have some time till then, we don’t have to finish all of it today.”
You happily agree and set down your pen. Yeri takes a sip of her frappuccino and you lean over the table to get closer to her. “Anyway, did you hear about what happened with Jiwon and Youngjae from the entertainment management department?”
Her eyes glisten with wicked interest. “No. Do tell.”
Break time is always synonymous with gossip hour between you and Yeri.
You spend the next fifteen minutes dishing what you know and Yeri offers her own input whenever she feels fit.
“And they think they’re being discreet, but the whole dorm knows they’ve been sneaking around, but guess wha─” Before you can finish your sentence, you are cut off by a loud and energetic voice calling out Yeri’s name.
The two of you look up to see a slim and boyish brunet waving to Yeri and excitedly making his way to your table. He looks vaguely familiar, but you can’t quite place your finger on it, so you let it go.
He smiles happily at Yeri and greets her. “Hey Yeri, how’s it going?” He notices you there and gives you a polite wave, which you return in the same manner.
Yeri replies back breezily, but with her full attention. “Good. Did you need anything, Mark?”
He flushes just the slightest bit, but it doesn’t escape your eyes. “Erm, nothing I just wanted to remind you that we’re meeting for the music theory project tomorrow at four. I would’ve texted, but I forgot to get your number in class, and I saw you here and thought it was a good opportunity to tell you.”
Yeri’s eyes widen, “ah right! I completely forgot about it. It’s a good thing you found me here today, huh? Here, I’ll give you my number.”
She reaches her hand out her hand expectantly, and Mark is confused before scrambling to pull out his phone. You can tell Mark looks flustered while Yeri is calmly putting in her contact information. After finishing, she hands his phone back, “okay, all set. Just shoot me a text so I have your number as well. Thanks for reminding me today or I probably would’ve forgotten and not have shown up or something.”
Mark smiles again, this time a little more sure than before. “All good. I’ll see you tomorrow, Yeri.”
They wave goodbye and you watch Mark scamper from the cafe. Your eyes follow him, but Yeri is already focused on you again, paying Mark’s retreating form no mind.
“So…” you start.
“So?” She returns.
“He’s cute.”
“Yeah, maybe,” she shrugged. “I barely know him though. We have music theory together, but this is the first time we’ve talked all semester and we’re only talking because we got paired up for a project.”
Yeri seems apathetic and you study her closely. You notice she’s acting a little too stiffly carefree to be truly indifferent to the situation. You can’t help, but to tease her a bit. “Well, make the most out of this project then.”
Yeri gives you a hard look and you decide to let it go despite finding your best friend’s situation to be amusing.
“Anyway, keep telling me about Jiwon and Youngjae. You never finished.” Yeri changes the topic, knowing that you might decide to pester her again if she doesn’t.
“As I was saying,” you started up again. A figure outside catches your attention and you peer outside through the window past Yeri’s shoulders. You realize it’s Mark and you watch with interest as he gestures excitedly, pointing to something in his hand, you assume his phone, to some of his friends. From there your eyes wander absentmindedly from one person to the next, and it’s when you see him.
The reaction is almost instantaneous.
“Like you were saying?” Yeri urges, but her words fall on deaf ears, for all your attention is captured by the boy next to Mark with heart-shaped lips.
When you see said boy laugh, you notice he has moon for eyes and you unconsciously suck in a sharp breath. You must have been staring too intently without noticing because he turns his head in your direction and you two hold direct eye contact. Like a deer caught in headlights, you freeze and lose all rational thought. Your head is completely blank. You have never seen someone so beautiful and your mind does not know how to process any sensory information at the moment.
Someone calls the boy away and the entire group of friends leave. It’s only then do you find yourself releasing a breath you didn’t know you had been holding onto so tightly. Your heart is pounding and you feel as though blood is rushing through your ears.
“Hello?” Yeri sounds annoyed, but you struggle to find the words to answer her.
You feel a sudden heat rush to color your cheeks a vibrant red and a feeling surges through you that leaves you out of breath and weak at the knees. A steady warmth washes over you quietly and you feel it deep within yourself and you can’t help but let out a small laugh.
How silly, you muse. Not to be dramatic, but you think you’re in love.
2. Shadow by f(x)
adoration from afar.
“I’m really really into you.”
The next few weeks are packed to the brim with assignments and papers, but despite this, you still find time for your personal research into the boy who was with Mark that day.
Being the obvious first and easiest option, you beg Yeri to ask Mark directly about his friend, but she immediately shoots you down.
“No. Absolutely not. At least not anytime soon anyway,” she huffs. “I’ve barely held two full conversations with him, like hell the next is gonna be about his friend just cause my best friend started thirsting over him after one glance. I mean come on, girl.” She shakes her head at you.
Yeri’s right and you apologize to her for being thoughtless of her situation. She doesn’t say it, but she seems really hopeful about the music theory project and what might bloom from it. You would not want to impede on such possibilities of happiness for your friend, so you let that option go, but Yeri promises to help in other ways and she does.
Somehow between caffeine fueled cram sessions and sleep deprivation, you, with Yeri’s help manage to find out more about the boy. You casually ask around in your contemporary writing and production department and she offers help by searching her vocal performance department.
You find out his name is Jung Jaehyun and he’s a third year in the musical theatre department and that he’s a member of the local chapter of the performing arts fraternity on campus. You also discover his Instagram handle and you find yourself skimming through his page throughout the day more often than you’re willing to admit to any living soul.
You occasionally see him around campus since you first saw him at the cafe and each time, you can feel your heart hammer in your chest and you become so flustered to the point of your sympathetic nervous system activating. Unfortunately for you, your body unconsciously chooses flight each and every time at the sight of Jaehyun because you can always feel your knees go weak and your body lurch away to escape in any direction that isn’t Jaehyun’s. You kind of hate yourself each time you do, but you can’t help it. He’s just so pretty that it’s intimidating!
You try to think positive after the bouts of shame you experience after each escapade.
Well there’s no way to embarrass yourself in front of him if you run away before having the chance to, right?
Even thinking about it now in the comfort of your bed, you can’t shake your self-consciousness and bury your face in a large pillow resting on your knees. Your cheeks are burning and you don’t know what to do.
“Hey, why don’t you just talk to him, instead of moping all day and stalking his profile like a creep.” Yeri’s crisp words cut through your musings and you glance up to see her entering your shared room in the dorms.
“Shut up. It’s not like I have a benevolent match-making professor who happens to pair me up with my crush for an end-of-semester project.” You retort back before sighing dramatically, “I literally have no excuse to talk to him. We’re not in the same year or major. We don’t even have mutual friends. Unless, y’know, you and Mark hit it off, who knows.”
Yeri sits down next to you on your small twin bed, resting her head on your shoulder while letting out an equally dramatic sigh, “yeah, well, Mark’s so dense, all the divine intervention in the world isn’t going to help me.”
You let out snort, “what’s up with you two anyway?”
“Y’know, I could’ve sworn he was into me and I had a chance with him, but every time we meet up we literally only work on the project and nothing else. Every time I sort of tried to do something I get shot down. Like I told him I was kind of chilly today in the library, and he looks all thoughtful for a moment but all he ends up saying is ‘yeah, all the buildings on campus are always cold, huh? Good thing I always bring a jacket with me. You should bring one too next time, I don’t want you getting cold.’ And then he just turns back to the project like nothing. Can you believe him?” Yeri complains and you swear her annoyance is palpable. “And every time I text him to hangout, he thinks it’s to work on the project. I honestly can’t tell if he’s really that stupid or if he’s just not into me.”
You laugh at her unfortunate, but undeniable state of love affairs.
“Really? That bad? I remember him being all blushy when he asked for your number,” you recall. “And you should’ve seen how he looked when he showed off he got your number. Well that’s what it looked like anyway, I could be wrong.”
“Well, at least I’ll get a good grade though. Mark is nothing if not diligent and hard-working, with him being a double major and all.” Yeri sounds resigned however, she sighs again, this time more frustrated and you hear the determination in her voice. “Alright, after finals, for sure we’re gonna hit the clubs. We need to let loose, have some fun.”
You agree with her to appease her short temper, but deep down you feel disappointed. You feel sorry for your friend, having genuinely wanted Mark and her to work out, but a small and selfish part of you felt sorry for having no bridge to Jaehyun at all if it didn’t work out between Yeri and Mark. Looks like you were stranded now and you’d have to find a way to Jaehyun one way or another, but your line of help ends here.
Shaking away such negative thoughts, you think to yourself how soju bombs and dance floors don’t so bad after such an intense exam period after all. It will definitely take your mind off of things for sure.
And even though you say this to yourself, you know your mind will still be plagued with Jung Jaehyun no matter how much you try.
3. What Is Love by EXO-K
careful contemplation.
“I can’t explain what I feel.”
“Mark, tell me you did not.” The disbelief in Johnny’s voice made the situation all the more hilarious and even Jaehyun, who’s the calmer of the two, couldn’t suppress the guffaw from escaping his lips.
The tips of Mark’s ears flush a light pink and he tries to deliver a convincing argument, but all that comes out is a meek stammer, further driving Johnny up the wall.
When Mark came up to his and Johnny’s room asking for advice, Jaehyun had an idea of where it was going to lead, considering Mark’s clueless disposition and inexperienced track record, but Jaehyun had no idea it was going to be this bad.
Mark, having developed a crush on a fellow vocal performance major in his music theory class, came to Johnny, his frat big, to spill his guts and ask for advice constantly. Being Johnny’s roommate, meant Jaehyun was also privy to all the details of Mark’s love life and he had no problem giving advice to the amusing first year student, which Mark appreciated because going to Johnny meant a clowning session before he could get any useful nuggets of information.
When Mark’s music theory professor randomly assigned the two for the end of semester project, Mark was one part excited and two parts nervous, resulting in a frazzled mess. He has been going up to the second room on the right of the second floor of the frat house almost every other day to ask for advice since then.
Johnny was thrilled when he initially heard of the project, already envisioning his little’s love prospects, stating something along the lines of “my little’s gonna get laid!”
However, now looking at Johnny rubbing his temples in exasperation, Jaehyun can tell that his roommate’s initial enthusiasm has dissipated.
Mark’s daily roadblock today consisted of his crush giving him the cold shoulder and being much more snappy than before in the project meet up earlier. Mark recalls Yeri’s anger toward him and racks his brain for an answer. Even Johnny and Jaehyun are stumped at the sudden behavior, assuming that things were going smoothly from Mark’s previous reports filled with clumsy, but endearing and ultimately positive signs. It’s only when Mark offhandedly mentions her so-called ‘strange’ comment about the temperature, does it become clear why Yeri’s attitude suddenly shifted so drastically.
“I mean, I don’t know what I did wrong.” Mark’s second attempt to defend himself has Johnny flaring his nostrils in indignation and Jaehyun has to turn away in an attempt to stifle his laughter.
“Dude, she’s so into you. Or, at least she was, I don’t know about it anymore.” Johnny starts after calming down. “She left herself wide open for you to take a clear shot and you effectively said to her face, ‘thanks but no thanks’ and then walked away. No wonder she’s pissed, I’d be pissed too.”
“Well, what was I supposed to do then?” Mark counters.
“Mark,” Johnny begins, his tone dry and coarse, “you’re killing me.”
Jaehyun deems this the perfect time to step in, the laughter about done coursing through his system at this point. He clears his throat before offering his input, “It’s not too, too bad. Johnny’s just being dramatic. If she likes you enough, she’ll probably forgive you if you play your cards right from here on out.”
Mark perks up, his attention solely on Jaehyun.
Jaehyun hums absentmindedly to himself, gathering and organizing his thoughts to properly explain exactly where and how Mark went wrong and what to do moving forward. When Jaehyun opens his mouth to speak, Mark is glued on to every word and Jaehyun can see the gears in his brain whirring at high speeds.
By the time Jaehyun is done, Johnny has calmed down and Mark nods his head fervently in understanding.
“Ah, that makes so much sense now! I got it now.”
Despite his assurances, both Johnny and Jaehyun know Mark will be back soon.
“Alright little, listen up,” Johnny starts. “Here’s the game plan from here on out.”
Johnny goes off on a sermon, determined to help his little ‘get some’ as Johnny so delicately puts it. Jaehyun can see it’s not the most tasteful of word choice for Mark to hear, but the youngest says nothing.
Lounging lazily in the bean bag on his side of the room, Jaehyun knocks his head back and thinks of a few weeks back when he accompanied Mark and some other frat members to the rec center for some basketball. Jaehyun remembers Mark was bemoaning the fact he forgot to ask for some girl’s number and it was as if a higher entity heard the boy’s laments and felt especially gracious, because right as they were passing the cafe, Mark stopped in his tracks and suddenly ran off into the busy building.
The group of frat boys watched him excitedly weave his way through the crowd of bodies and occupied tables to reach a table with two girls. When they saw the girl putting her number into Mark’s phone, Johnny elbowed Jaehyun, and like a proud parent Johnny exaggeratedly acknowledged his little. “They grow up so fast, don’t they, Jaehyun.” Johnny even wiped an imaginary tear from his eye to really send the message home.
It was only a few moments later and Mark came bounding out of the cafe, eager to show everyone how lucky it was that he happened to see her. “I mean what are the odds, right?” the said boy exclaimed so happily, his cheer so infectious, Jaehyun couldn’t help himself from letting out a laugh of his own.
Jaehyun turned to give Mark an encouraging pat on the back and it’s when he notices a pair of eyes on him. He turns fully to come in the direct line of sight of a girl whose eyes, Jaehyun imagined to have been very warm, had they not been burning holes into him. Her intense gaze slightly unnerved him, but not to the point of pulling away. He found himself entranced and the only thing that broke the quick spell was Johnny’s voice, calling him to move it along.
Jaehyun recalls easily breaking eye contact and giving little thought to the strange girl with fire for eyes, but as the days passed, Jaehyun couldn’t shake the thought of her from his mind.
Even now in the comfort of his room and with Johnny and Mark not even a foot away, carefully planning Mark’s love endeavors, all Jaehyun’s mind can really focus on is the thought of you.
Jaehyun is sure he’s only looked at you for less than a minute, but somehow he’s able to clearly trace out the image of you that day, like a perfect snapshot.
“Yo Jaehyun,” Johnny calls. “You good? You’ve been spacing out, bro.”
“Yeah, I’m good.” Jaehyun answers offhandedly, before contemplating to himself. Was he good? Jaehyun wouldn’t necessarily say he’s bad in any way, but it isn’t normal for him to have the thought of a girl remain so clearly engraved in his mind for so long, and even less common for it to actually be a girl he doesn’t even know nonetheless. It’s not a pressing issue, but it does bother him. He weighs over the next steps in his mind.
“Alright, just making sure.”
With one last thought, Jaehyun concludes to himself that it’s time to tackle his concern at hand head-on.
“Actually,” he starts, “Mark, do you remember the girl next to Yeri the day you asked for her number?”
Mark quirks his head in thought and Jaehyun can see Johnny raise his eyebrows in sudden interest.
“Uh kinda,” Mark answers. “I think she’s a CWP major. I’m pretty sure we shared an arranging class last semester, but like, I don’t know her personally or anything; it was a large lecture. To be honest, I don’t even think she recognized me at all, judging from her reaction that day. Why, what’s up?”
Jaehyun nods, absorbing the information, giving Johnny ample time to fire away.
“Yeah Jaehyun,” Jaehyun can visualize the glint in Johnny’s eyes just from hearing his mischievous tone. “What is up? I haven’t seen you ask about a girl in a hot minute. Thought you suddenly went abstinent without telling me or something.”
Jaehyun isn’t quite sure how to reply. Without a doubt you were cute to Jaehyun and he wouldn’t be opposed for things to happen between the two of you, but he doesn’t even know you! Well, not that it’s been a problem for Jaehyun in the past, but your lingering presence bothers him in ways he cannot communicate. Why is that the thought of you won’t leave him and why does it bother him so much?
Jaehyun decides to be straightforward, as straightforward as his muddled brain allows him to be. “She’s cute. I wanna get to know her.”
“Okay, Jaehyun.” Johnny whoops obnoxiously. “I see you.”
Mark is surprised and suddenly Johnny is all fired up again. Abruptly, Johnny shoots up and the determination that burns in his eyes is admirable.
“I’ve got it!” He declares proudly.
Jaehyun and Mark are quiet, waiting patiently for him to continue. They say nothing, knowing there is not a thing that can reach him when Johnny gets like this.
“We’re throwing a party and you bet your ass your two girls are gonna be there.”
4. Heaven by Ailee
walking on Cloud 9.
“When I hear your voice, it feels like I’m dreaming.”
You look up at the two-story house before you and wonder how you got here. Actually, you don’t wonder at all because you know exactly how you ended up at the steps of the local performing arts fraternity at your college, but you sigh regardless, as if someone had weaseled you into being here. Your nerves gnaw at you and you feel your stomach doing all types of aerobic tricks, the feeling reminiscent of the sensation before the roller coaster drops.
Yeri grabs your hand and pulls you excitedly to the front door. You can feel the thrum of music emanating from the building.
You recall how Yeri almost jumped you to tell the good news.
Finals flew by without any major hitches, ignoring sleepless nights and caffeine crashes. You don’t know how you’ll do, but you’re satisfied with your exam performances. You were in the clear and were just waiting for Yeri to present her joint music theory project before the both of you could finally let loose as a celebration to end the school year.
You waited for her outside of the classroom building as promised, playing with your phone to past time until you were suddenly engulfed by a delighted pair of arms. Yeri hugged you tight; she was in high spirits, seemingly from acing her presentation and you hugged her back in congratulations. She pulled at you closer and whispered in your ears, “just say yes.”
You were confused, but looked up to see Mark headed toward the two you. Yeri released you, leaving one arm still slung casually over your shoulder.
“Hey guys. My frat’s throwing a party tonight to celebrate finishing exams. I was wondering if, uh, you guys wanted to come? I mean you don’t have to, it’s totally optional.”
You didn’t say anything at first and Yeri interjected, “Of course!” She smiled at you innocently despite harshly pinching you to respond, her action hidden from Mark’s sight. “We’d love to, right?”
“Uh,” you answered distractedly. “Y-yeah, sure.”
“Great.” Mark beamed. “Party starts at eight. I gotta go help set up, so I’ll see ya there!”
And with that, he left as soon as he arrived and you looked at Yeri questioningly for answers. “I thought we were hitting downtown tonight. What happened to club hopping?”
Yeri smiled devilishly, “change of plans. I’ll tell you more about it later. The most important thing is finding the perfect outfit for you tonight, cause Jaehyun’s gonna be there.”
And so, here you find yourself dressed in high-waisted shorts and a cute top that took an embarrassingly long time to decide on. You are greeted by the fraternity president at the door of the house, Taeyong you think his name is, and he gives you two a quick verbal tour of the place, really emphasizing where to get drinks. Yeri thanks him for the both of you and you enter the crowded house. You think at least half of the performing art majors must’ve been here judging by the sheer volume of packed bodies.
You remember Yeri explaining how she and Mark may have been making a breakthrough and this party was imperative for its success. You were completely okay attending for that reason alone, because after all, what kind of person sends her best friend to a frat party alone? However, your resolve to go was set in stone after she explained that the frat that was throwing the party just happened to be the same frat Jaehyun was a member of.
“And y’know, seeing as how you’ve been obsessing over him the past few weeks, it’s the perfect opportunity.”
You frown remembering her words and make your way to the kitchen with Yeri in tow. Various beverages, alcoholic and non-alcoholic, crowd the table and you recognize the guy standing nearby idly chatting with others. It’s Jaemin, an acting major in your history lecture with whom you frequently exchange notes with when either one of you decides to flake for the day. You vaguely recall him mentioning his fraternity association, but didn’t realize it happened to be this one. He sees the two of you approaching the drink table and he smiles widely.
“Oh hey, what’s up?” Jaemin greets casually. “Didn’t expect to see you here. How’d you think you did in the history final?”
You groan. “I don’t even want to talk about it. What’s important is that we’re finished and I won’t ever have to think about the WWII timeline for, hopefully, forever.”
“Amen,” Jaemin laughs. “I’ll drink to that.” He raises up his red solo cup to cheers, before realizing both you and Yeri had nothing to drink.
“Oh shit, I’m a pretty bad host, huh? First thing I should've done was get you two something to drink.” He chides himself, but his tone is playful. “What can I get for you, ladies?”
Before you can think about what you want, Yeri cuts you off, her tone matching Jaemin’s. “How about some shots to start off and we’ll forgive the lack of hospitality.”
Jaemin laughs again. “Alright, I like it.” His hands are adept at weaving around the table and finding the paper shot cups and the vodka. “Svedka’s okay, right?”
“We’re not picky.” You and Yeri agree. You take the shot in one gulp and the unpleasant burning in your throat makes you wince.
“Can I get you two anything else?”
“Yeah,” you say. “I think another shot and then a mixed drink. Anything’s fine, but preferably on the stronger side.” You look over at Yeri and she nods in agreement.
“Coming right up.” Jaemin agrees easily.
He pours the two of you another shot and you think he must be a generous guy because the shot is overflowing. You and Yeri cheer once more while Jaemin gets to work mixing a cherry bourbon with some Coke. He tops off the drinks with some ice before handing it over to the both of you. “Here they are. Enjoy, ladies.”
You thank him and take a sip before excusing yourself to make your way around the party. The drink is sweet and the smoky aftertaste of the bourbon gives it a pleasant edge. You and Yeri are attached to the hip as you drift from one part to another around the party, making easy going small talk along the way. You are sufficiently buzzed by this point and feel much lighter as though the party was somehow two degrees removed from your senses. You look over to check on Yeri and she’s noticeably drunker than you are, giggling about the simplest of things and slurring her words just the slightest bit. You make a mental note to ease the drinking, wanting to be sober enough to look after her in case anything were to arise.
The two of you are at the base of the stairs when you hear Mark’s voice calling Yeri’s name. You turn your attention upward to see him ambling down the stairs with excited fervor. His cheeks are flushed, more so than usual around Yeri, and you can tell it’s due to alcohol because Mark is holding her hands and you know he can never be so bold without the help of liquid courage.
“Yo Mark, slow down there.” A voice calls out and you look up again and you feel your breath caught in your throat.
There in front of your eyes is Jung Jaehyun in the flesh. He looks heavenly dressed in simple jeans and a white tee. You unconsciously swallow the lump in your throat and your heart beat gallops a mile a minute in your chest. Your mouth goes dry and you mindlessly gulp down swigs of your drink. You know Yeri would’ve sniggered at your current state had she not been so tipsy and completely preoccupied with Mark.
Jaehyun catches up to Mark and when he reaches the base of the stairs, he notices the two of you.
“Oh Jaehyun, lemme introduce you guys.”
As promised, Mark introduces everyone quickly and Jaehyun shoots a smile that seems to be aimed at you. “Nice to meet everyone.”
“Cool, now that everyone knows each other,” Mark starts. “Yeri, can I show you something?”
“Uh, y-yeah.”
You give Yeri a hard look and she takes your hand to squeeze it in reassurance. She looks at you pleadingly and there’s a confidence in her eyes that you can’t argue with. You relent and let her go.
Mark takes her by the hand and leads her up the stairs while you watch, slightly worried.
Jaehyun seems to have sensed your apprehension because the words that leave his mouth snaps you out of your perturbed state. “Don’t worry. Mark’s a good kid, you have nothing to worry about. You have my word on it.”
And suddenly the situation dawns on you. The boy of your recent all-consuming infatuation stands here before you, and it’s just the two of you alone. Any social skills you have, leave you and you’re unsure of what to do.
Jaehyun notices the awkward tension in the air and works quickly to dispel it. “Your drink’s looking low. Can I get you something else?”
You look down to your drink to see that he was right. Only a few sips remain. You didn’t realize you had drank so much at the sight of Jaehyun.
“Um, some water would be good. I don’t want to be too hungover tomorrow.” You answer shyly. You also need to be sober enough to look after Yeri, but you decide to leave that out.
Jaehyun chuckles, “sure thing. Here, come with me. I’ll get you some water.”
Jaehyun leads you to the kitchen with ease, seamlessly weaving through the crowds of people. Every group of people he passes greets him loudly to be heard of the pounding bass of the music. You are not surprised to see how popular he is.
Once in the kitchen, he grabs you a bottle of water and a beer for himself from the fridge and you thank him. The cold water is refreshing, but it does little to cool your nerves. The awkward tension is high and still ever present. You feel as though you’re drowning in it and you also feel like running away from here despite this being what you’ve wanted for more than anything for weeks on end.
“So,” Jaehyun starts, clearing his throat. “Mark told me you’re a CWP major?”
“Uh, y-yeah, actually.” You hate how you’re so flustered around him. “How’d he know? Did Yeri tell him or something?”
“He said you guys shared an arranging class last semester.” Jaehyun recalls.
“Wait, really? I had no idea.” You start going off on how you could’ve missed such a thing and Jaehyun smiles. You’re much more comfortable when a rhythm has been established and the words flow out of you easily. You’re not as relaxed as where Jaehyun wants you to be, but he thinks it’s a good start.
You continue with small talk from there, much less uptight than before and you feel glad. Jaehyun is as radiant in person as he is in your imagination. You find him to be very kind and your heart flutters even more. Jaehyun mentions he’s a musical theatre major and you do your best to act surprised despite it being one of the only things you know about him prior to this moment.
Before he gets a chance to tell you more about himself, a tall boy with long limbs calls out to Jaehyun that it’s his turn to join the next game of beer pong. Jaehyun looks reluctant to leave and you don’t want him to leave either, but you’d hate to hold him back from prior engagements.
“Would you,” Jaehyun licks his lips in consideration, “like to play with me? I don’t have a partner.”
You nod your head and readily agree, eager to spend more time with him.
You’ve only played beer pong a handful of times and being around Jaehyun makes you nervous, so you miss the first few shots. You feel embarrassed, but Jaehyun is patient and assures you that it’s no problem at all. His little words of encouragement mixed with the beer you drink helps melt your tension, and halfway through the game, you’re whooping and hollering with everyone watching the game.
You high-five Jaehyun without a second thought after nailing a perfect shot and Jaehyun smiles even wider. The two of you are leading when Taeyong comes in to kick everyone out.
“Sorry guys, party’s over.”
Groans of complaints could be heard throughout the crowd, but Taeyong’s words are firm and he ushers everyone to leave. He has a few other frat members behind him helping out. He reaches the beer pong table and pulls Jaehyun aside. After a few exchanged words, Jaehyun nods in agreement and ends the game completely, apologizing to his opponents.
You’re confused, so you carefully ask Jaehyun what’s going on. He sees you and his gaze softens, he quietly explains, “apparently, the campus police have received multiple noise complaints and since the fraternity already has a strike, Taeyong doesn’t really want to risk another. “
“Ah, I see.” You nod. You’re saddened by the turn of events, having finally eased into a relative comfort around Jaehyun and you yearn for more. “Well, I better go look for Yeri then.”
This is a goodbye and you’re unsure of what else to say to him, your disappointment mixes with alcohol making you feel even more miserable. You want to ask for more, but can’t find the words to reach him. Luckily, Jaehyun does it for you.
“Are you free sometime this week?” He asks. “I feel like we didn’t get a chance to really talk and I’d like to.”
Your heart hammers and the blood rushes in your ears, but you still find yourself uttering a mousy agreement.
“Great,” his smile is dazzling and you feel dizzy. “It’s a date then.”
5. 24 Hours by Sunmi
rushed minutes.
“Time goes by so quickly.”
“Hey,” a distant voice calls out and Jaehyun looks up from his phone to see your approaching figure. Your cheeks are rosy from the summer sun and stray pieces of your hair escape from your loosely styled updo. Jaehyun takes all of you in with careful appreciation.
“Hey yourself.” Jaehyun chuckles, slipping his phone casually in his pocket and standing up straighter to greet you properly.
Jaehyun sees the red of your face flush brighter, the soft color bleeding across your cheeks and onto your nose. Cute, he thinks. He watches as you tighten your grip on your clutch, knuckles white with nervous tension, in an attempt to gather your composure and calm your nerves. You clear your throat, “I didn’t know you’d be here so soon. You should’ve texted me.”
“It’s all good, I finished early.” Jaehyun notices you no longer stutter around him like the first night you two met. He’s glad the days and nights of sober texting after exchanging numbers at the party did wonders to make you feel comfortable around him. He’s not too worried about your current ‘first-date’ anxiety, knowing it’ll be dispelled soon enough. “Shall we?” He moves to open the door and the cool rush of air from the cafe greets the two of you.
The cafe is quaint and cozy, tucked away in a small corner of intersecting back streets and crowded buildings. Jaehyun discovered the little spot not too long ago and something, Jaehyun assumes his instincts, compelled him to take you to it for the first official date. It just felt right.
The two of you walk to the order counter and you take it all in. You can hear the quiet chatter of the cafe occupants mixed with the rattle of espresso machines being put to work. Your eyes scan over the decorations and several potted succulents hanging from the ceiling. It’s incredibly homey and you feel at ease.
“Hiya, I can help the two of you whenever you guys are ready.” The barista is cheerful to a fault and Jaehyun watches you shoot her a grateful smile before your eyes move to the menu to decide on what to get.
Jaehyun knows what he wants, so he waits patiently for you to decide, but seeing your eyebrows scrunch together in indecision, Jaehyun chuckles to himself. “I hear the iced lattes here are really good, particularly the caramel latte,” he offers.
You perk up in surprise, but you recover quickly, “okay, that sounds good then. I was between that and the iced cocoa.”
“No problem, I’ll order then. Today’s on me.” Jaehyun says.
Jaehyun walks up to the barista and quickly places the order. He reaches for his wallet after the barista recites the order, but he falters slightly when he sees your gaze glued to the cake display, particularly the crepe cake.
“Can I get a slice of the chocolate crepe cake over there too?”
“Of course! Here’s your new total,” she turns the touch screen display over to Jaehyun and he readily inserts his card to pay. When finished, Jaehyun turns back the screen and after a few taps from the barista, a receipt is printed and she hands him a buzzer.
“Your order will be out shortly.” She informs him.
Jaehyun smiles and says a small ‘thank you’ in return before turning his attention to you. You look up to meet his eyes and you smile, “can we sit over there by the window?”
You head to the little corner table first with Jaehyun steadily in tow. You sit at the chair that leaves your back to the window and Jaehyun is mesmerized by how the afternoon sunlight refracts through your silhouette. You’re glowing and Jaehyun swallows thickly.
“So,” he starts. “What have you been up to?”
“Celebrating finishing my first year of college in one piece.” You laugh lightly. “I got by with passable grades, but other than that Yeri and I just finished moving into our new dorms. We’re no longer freshmen, so first year dorms are off limits. I’m gonna miss the convenient location.” You jokingly mope.
Jaehyun laughs easily with you and before he gets a chance to reply, the buzzer goes off so he excuses himself to go pick up the order.
A different barista places down a tray with your two drinks and a small slice of cheesecake with two dessert forks resting on some napkins. “Enjoy your order!”
Jaehyun smiles in thanks and picks up the tray to bring it back to the table. He can’t wait to see the look on your face when you see the mille crepe cake and true to his expectations, your eyes light up at the sight of dessert.
“Surprise.” He says. “I saw you looking at it earlier.”
Jaehyun watches as you immediately grab a small fork and try a piece of the cake with unrestricted child-like excitement. Your eyes light up at the taste of the delicate layers of fresh whipped cream and thin crepes and the smile you shoot in his direction has Jaehyun’s heart beating a little faster than he’s willing to admit.
“Thank you!” You look up at him. “It’s so good, you should definitely try a bite too.”
“Yeah? I’ll try some then.” Jaehyun sits down and leans even closer to you over the table, his mouth open and expectant and his eyes staring straight into yours.
You try your best to bite back the scarlet fighting to stain your cheeks as you cinch off a small section of the cake with your fork. Your hand falters just the slightest bit when delivering the small confection to his awaiting mouth, but you push through and feed him despite the embarrassment you feel.
Jaehyun chews slowly and deliberately, taking his time to lick the stray whipped cream from the corner of his mouth. You lose the game of chicken, breaking eye contact first.
“Yeah,” he agrees. “It’s good. We should definitely come back.”
You let out a little awkward cough, desperate to ward off your cloud of emotions. “Uhm, yeah sure.”
Jaehyun has always thought you were cute, but he thinks you’re especially cute today.
“Anyway,” you start. You want to change the topic because you don’t think you can survive this tension without your brain frying. “I feel like I’ve just seen you around recently. I should’ve run into you a long time ago since the performing arts college is so small.”
“Oh,” Jaehyun is a little taken aback. “I used to be over at the East Campus. I was a business and administration major for two years before I switched over to musical theatre.”
“Wait really?” Your surprise erases any tension you felt earlier. “I had no idea.”
“Yeah,” he laughs. “It doesn’t really come up in conversation.”
“Why’d you switch over? If you don’t mind me asking.”
Jaehyun contemplates his reply for a second as takes a sip of his coffee. “Well, when I entered college, I didn’t really know what I wanted, so I just followed whatever my parents wanted me to do. I actually knew I liked musical theatre for the longest time, but it took time for me to build up the courage to switch. My parents weren’t happy with it at first and we fought for the longest time, but I think they’ve warmed up to it enough by now. I’ve never really talked about this though, I just tell people I transferred from a different college and the conversation just ends there I guess, but it’s really no big deal.”
“Thank you for telling me this, Jaehyun.” Your voice is sincere and Jaehyun believes you.
“What about you, hm?” Jaehyun returns. “Why CWP?”
“I don’t really have one point that changed my life and helped me find my calling or whatever,” you ponder with a tilt of the head and the taste of cream dissolving in your mouth. “But ever since I was little, I always knew I was gonna end up doing something in music. I was never good at singing though, so vocal performance was out the door and I wasn’t that interested in classical instruments either, so that helped me narrow stuff down. Actually, what really helped me decide was during orientation, my group leader was a contemporary writing and production major and she told me all about it and I’ve been sold ever since. I really like it though, and have no intention of switching.”
“That’s good. Sometimes I wish I switched earlier.” Jaehyun muses. “I feel so behind sometimes. Most people in my class have already been in at least one musical and an internship, except for me. I think about it a lot, but I try not to let it get me so down.”
“You shouldn’t feel that way!” You try your best to cheer him up, and Jaehyun appreciates it a lot more than he thought he would. “Everyone has their own pace, that’s what college is all about! Nothing is ever wasted time. You can think of your time as a business admin major as a way to help you make up your mind on your true passion. You told me you’ve always liked musical theatre, but I’ve bet without the time in business, you would’ve never known you liked it enough to pursue a career out of it.”
Jaehyun laughs at your earnesty. He thinks you’re a touch naive, but your words make him feel light. “You’re right. I can say for sure I wasn’t happy as a business major.”
“See? Nothing is ever wasted time if you can discover your true happiness out of it.”
The two of you exchange easy chatter after that and between small bites of cake and sips of coffee, Jaehyun thinks you’ve become prettier and prettier.
“What was it like?” You ask absentmindedly.
“Hm? What was ‘what’ like?”
“Being a business and administration major.”
Jaehyun has to think about it. He recalls constantly dressing up for group presentations and boring lectures, but his mind wanders to his activities outside the classroom. He remembers the constant partying and the blur of faces that helped him keep his bed warm. He remembers brief flings and relationships cut short. He doesn’t want to think about those things when he’s next to you. “Uhm. It was okay, nothing special, but that reminds me–”
“Yeah?”
“Are you free next weekend?”
“I should be. Why, what’s up?”
“Great,” Jaehyun smiles while taking the last sip of his coffee. “I’m having a housewarming party at my new apartment. You should definitely be there.”
--
The day of the long awaited housewarming party rolls up sooner than expected between settling into your new dorm with Yeri and the occasional small ‘get-togethers’ with Jaehyun. They’re actually dates if you're being honest, but you don’t want to put a title on anything in case he wasn’t on the same page as you. Being with Jaehyun made you giddy in more ways than one, but that means the anxiety that pools at the base of your stomach grows larger each day when the relationship between the two of you goes unnamed. You feel greedy when you desperately grasp at the shred of time you share with him, always unwillingly to let go.
“Are you ready?” Yeri’s voice breaks you out of your small reverie. Her hand is poised, ready to knock on the black door of Jaehyun’s apartment, waiting for you to gather your composure. Yeri is dressed to the nines in a cute skirt with a top to match. She wants to look good for her new boyfriend and you teased her endlessly for it when the two of you were getting ready.
“Mark’s one lucky guy.”
“Shut up. Worry about yourself.”
“All I do is love you, yet you’re so mean to me.”
Regardless of her harsh words toward you, she helped you toss your closet inside and out for the perfect outfit to woo Jaehyun, even if it meant showing up late to the party.
The two of you leave your dorm twenty minutes later than you intended and it also didn’t help that Jaehyun’s apartment was difficult to find, tucked away in a small building between towering skyscrapers, but now is finally the moment of truth.
“Yeah, I’m ready as I’ll ever be,” you mutter as you watch Yeri knock on the door.
It takes a minute before the door creaks open and Jaehyun’s head pops out. His smile is radiant and you’re absolutely ensnared by the way his fringe falls over his forehead.
“Hey, glad you two could make it.” Jaehyun opens the door wider to allow you and Yeri to enter. He greets Yeri with polite warmth while he wraps an arm over your shoulders. When Yeri heads in the apartment first with her back against the two of you, Jaehyun steals a quick peck to your temple and whispers, “you look pretty tonight.”
His touch is fleeting and he pulls back quickly, as if you imagined the whole thing, but his cheeky smile tells you that it really did happen. Your heart hammers and you force yourself to focus on the steady thrum of mellow R&B that reverberates throughout his apartment to calm yourself. You take his apartment in steady strides with your full attention. It’s sleek and modern with a few pops of his personality here and there in the form of trinkets decoration choices.
“Hey!” Johnny calls over from the couch. He has a beer in hand, but he’s far from tipsy. Flanked on one side is Doyoung with another beer to match and on the other is Sicheng. Seulgi, the girl, who you assume is Sicheng’s significant other, by the way his arm is casually wrapped around her waist, is also there and she nods at you in greeting. You've come to know about all of them after hanging out with Jaehyun so much. “Did you guys get lost or something?”
“Yeah,” Yeri replies as she moves to sit next to Mark who’s on the adjacent loveseat and resting a drink on the coffee table. “Something like that.”
She places a sweet kiss to the corner of Mark’s mouth in greeting and you swear you can hear him crooning at the attention.
“Doesn’t matter, Johnny. The important thing is that they’re here now.” Jaehyun interjects. “Do you guys want anything to drink?”
“That’d be nice.” You hum.
Yeri laughs in agreement, “yeah, the two of us could never say no to a drink.”
“Alright, I’m on it.” Jaehyun calls while moving to the kitchen. “Any preferences?”
“No,” you say. “Surprise us.”
Jaehyun works to mix drinks and you take a seat on the floor next to the coffee table to observe the party. Perched on the shelf of a slender bookcase in the corner of his living room is a bluetooth speaker playing music, the rhythm quiet and bass steady as everyone chatters away once introductions are made on the sofas. You remember him offhandedly mentioning that he doesn’t want any noise complaints on his first week in the new place and it makes sense. Jaehyun’s housewarming party is a quiet affair that is far different from the wild party at the frat house in which you met him, but you think this vibe fits Jaehyun more.
Jaehyun returns shortly with two drinks in tow for you and Yeri and sits himself snugly next to you on the floor. He picks his idle beer from the coffee table and once Johnny realizes that everyone in the proximity has a drink in hand, he raises his voice and beer in a toast. “It sucks that Taeyong couldn’t make it tonight, but here’s to having fun without him. We’re gonna get twice as fucked up to make up for his absence, cheers!”
Everyone lets out a chuckle, but obliges to humor him anyway and joins to connect their drink to his in cheers.
You pull your cup back and take a big gulp of the drink. It’s sweet and carbonated, but the sting of alcohol at your throat leaves you wincing just the slightest bit.
A few pleasantries are exchanged here and there, but it’s only then does Doyoung pull out a deck of cards with a devilish glint in his eyes that deceive his looks.
“Ring of fire, anyone?”
--
After who knows how many rounds of ring of fire (and maybe a few other drinking games here and there) with too many drink refills for you to remember, you somehow find yourself splayed on the couch and leaning over Yeri’s shoulder in support. Seulgi is on the other side of you leaning on you for support, the same way you’re doing to Yeri, but you don’t mind it one bit. The three of you have grown surprisingly close with one another throughout the night.
Your mind is lucid enough to still be conscious and completely aware of where you are and what you’re doing, but the alcohol in your system eats away at the details in your memory.
You vaguely recall ridiculous punishments that involved Johnny twerking on the dining room table and Mark taking a shot of Jack Daniels mixed with ketchup, and you can’t help but snicker to yourself.
“I think we should get going now.” Sicheng is the first to speak as he moves to help Seulgi up. “It’s getting late.”
Doyoung looks a little groggy, but when he checks the time, he perks up immediately, “oh shit, you’re right. I need to get going too, I’ve got something in the morning.”
With that everyone shuffles to clean the remnants of the party with as much grace as they can muster while intoxicated, which wasn’t much, but in twenty minutes, Jaehyun is already walking half the party to the door in goodbye. Only you, Mark, and Yeri are left.
“Hey Yeri,” Mark calls softly to Yeri as he brushes a strand of hair from her face. “Are you ready to go too?”
Yeri is still sprawled on the couch with you, but mumbles a small response. “Yeah, I should be. Give me a second.”
She turns over to you and nudges you just the slightest bit. “I’m gonna go back to Mark’s tonight, are you gonna be okay?”
“Yeah,” you assure her. “I’ll be fine, just go have fun.”
“She’s free to rest here until she’s ready to leave, don’t worry. I’ll call a cab for her when the time comes.” Jaehyun pipes up.
Yeri gives you a look, but you squeeze her hand one last time to give her some peace of mind. “I’m a big girl, Yeri. I’ll be okay, promise. I’ll walk you to the door, Mark’s waiting.”
You give Yeri a tight hug in goodbye and you find your way back to the couch. The fact that you’re all alone in Jaehyun’s apartment doesn’t hit because of the remnants of alcohol in your system melts away your nerves.
You’re pleasantly buzzed, lost in your own thoughts when Jaehyun comes up to you with a glass of water in hand. “Here, so you don’t feel as bad tomorrow morning.”
You accept it gratefully and take in big gulps, the water refreshing, but your skin feels hot.
Jaehyun takes a seat next to you and the proximity makes your head spin. You turn to look at him, and he flashes you a smile.
“Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?”
“You might’ve mentioned something.” You tease. “But I don’t mind hearing it again.”
“Well,” he hums. You’re not sure, but you think the distance between the two of you is decreasing. “You really do look stunning tonight.”
You flush at his words, but you look straight into his eyes. “You don’t look too bad yourself.”
“Yeah? I try to impress.” Jaehyun’s eyes are hooded and your throat goes dry. “Can I kiss you?”
You say nothing at first, his words not registering into your muddled brain, but when you feel his breath ghost over your lips, you don’t hesitate to close the gap between you.
His lips are slightly chapped and you can taste the vodka on his breath, but to you it’s perfect. Jaehyun’s perfect.
Jaehyun kisses you with reserved passion and practiced expertise. His tongue sets the rhythm against yours and his roaming hands have you feeling as if you’ve been set ablaze. He pulls back just the tiniest bit and the intense longing for his touch that hits you is indescribable.
You pull him back in your arms and your lips reconnect in a desperate fervor. Jaehyun adjusts his arms around you and the next you know, you’re in his embrace and he’s carrying you to his bedroom. He places you down gently, his bed is plush and comforter soft.
Jaehyun’s touch is gentle as he gathers your face in his hands. He kisses you again and you wrap your arm around his neck to pull him closer. He pulls back and looks at you earnestly. “I don’t want to do anything you’re not comfortable with. We don’t have to do anything tonight.”
Everything’s moving so fast and you’re dizzy, but you don’t want whatever this is to stop. You want to be as close to Jaehyun as possible.
“No,” your voice is hoarse. “Don’t stop. I want you, Jaehyun.”
He kisses you again, this time unrestrained. His tongue is hot, but you can only savor it for a minute before he starts trailing kisses down your neck and tugging at your shirt. You let out a breathy moan in response to how his touches make you feel.
Jaehyun reaches at your shorts and makes quick work at unbuttoning them. You help him remove the article of clothing and his slender fingers dart inside your panties. You’re slick to the touch and Jaehyun must be made of magic because you think you’re seeing stars. You unravel before him embarrassingly quick, but he kisses you at the base of your clavicle in sweet reassurance.
Your chest is heaving, but you want more. You grab at Jaehyun’s shirt, urging him to take it off. The expanse of his abdomen is a sight to behold, but Jaehyun is cruel and doesn’t give you the time to take it in. He’s on top of you again, lips crashing onto yours once more. He reaches behind you to unclasp your bra and while he’s pre-occupied, you unbuckle his belt and steal a moment in his boxers. He feels thick and hot in your hands as you run your finger over the tip to feel a drop of pre-cum. He buckles just the slightest bit and it emboldens you.
Jaehyun helps himself out of his jeans and you push him onto the bed wanting to be on top this time. He’s straining against his boxers and you want to help relieve the tension. When you pull off his boxers you can feel his inaudible groan. You stroke his length gingerly and look up to see him with hooded eyes look right back at you.
This excites you so you take him in your mouth in a moment of unfiltered courage. Your tongue starts at the base before tracing your way up to his sensitive head. You tease him accordingly to his quiet grunts and groans and when you feel like he’s had enough, you take all of him in until his tip is hitting the back of your throat. You gag a bit, but push through.
“Fuck,” Jaehyun stutters out between stacatoed breaths. “Babe, you’re so good.”
You hum in pleasure at his praise and he grabs your hair. This goes on for a few more minutes before he reaches down to stop you. “Not that I don’t love this,” the look in your eyes nearly has him faltering his words, “but I don’t want to cum just yet.”
You relent with a slick pop and Jaehyun shifts over to rummage for a condom in his nightstand. You settle back down in his pillows. Jaehyun gives you a soft kiss on the lips before he enters you.
“Tell me when it’s okay to move,” he whispers and you place a small kiss at the base of his neck.
He starts off slow to let you acclimate to his size, but neither of you are very patient, so he ends up pounding into you a lot sooner than he anticipated and you find yourself getting caught up in the pleasure.
It feels like you’re dreaming, but if this was a dream, you never want to wake up.
6. Hush by Miss A
shh, no talking, just us.
“I can’t think straight.”
You and Jaehyun don’t become official until a few weeks later.
He asks you one day when you’re naked and out of breath. You’ve gone one too many rounds with him and a thin layer of sweat coats your body as you lay on his heaving chest. You absentmindedly draw shapes on his skin and he gives you a chaste kiss to your temple.
“We should date.” He hums. “I think I’d make a good boyfriend.”
“Yeah?” You raise your eyebrow in teasing.
“Yeah,” he ascertains. “Give me a chance and I’ll show you.”
“Hmm,” you pretend to think it over as if this wasn’t you’ve been hoping for since the first moment you laid eyes on him. “Okay. Let’s give it a try, boyfriend.”
Jaehyun laughs and you feel the world fall into its right place. “Alright, girlfriend.”
And the rest is history as they say.
Jaehyun isn’t your first, but you experience many firsts with him. You’re not exactly inexperienced, but he really opens your eyes.
“Fuck,” he groans into your neck. His hands grip at your hips to help guide you along, but you’re fully in charge. “You’re doing so good, babe. Just like that.”
You didn’t see yourself as someone who liked to take charge during sex, but after that one time Jaehyun asked you to top, you’ve never looked back since.
You roll hips into him and at a pace you know drives Jaehyun wild and you pull him into a sloppy kiss. It’s all tongue and no grace, but you love it the same regardless. You capture his bottom lips between your teeth playfully before pushing him flat on his back until he’s firm against his plush mattress. You place a hand on his chest and the other on his thigh to balance yourself and Jaehyun immediately knows you’re close.
A hand rests on your hip to steady you while the other snakes over to play with your clit to further stimulate you toward your climax. Jaehyun knows what you like and his timing is impeccable, so before you know it, both of you are reaching your highs together. You collapse on his chest and you allow yourself to stay in his warmth long enough to have your breaths synchronize before you extricate yourself from him to head to his bathroom.
When you come back out, he’s disposed of the used condom and opens your arm wide for a hug, which you gladly indulge in.
Time stops when you’re in his arms.
--
On the surface, it looks like Jaehyun likes to mix it up. He seems like an elusive guy with varied tastes, but the more time you spend with him, you realize he likes the control of seeing you unravel before him.
He likes the intimacy of missionary.
The close proximity to your body has him looking into your eyes and leaving you feeling the most vulnerable of ways. He has full access to your neck, which he lovingly claims as his own and you chide him the next day when you see scattered purple blooms. Jaehyun changes his pace on a whim and you fall to his mercy. When he takes you fast and hard, you see stars, but when thrusts in you with languid leisure, he has you begging for more.
He likes the intensity of taking from behind.
When you’re on your knees with your ass in the air, he takes it as a guarantee to fuck you senseless. Your muffled moans makes his dick twitch and you swear you can feel him fuck into you even faster. Jaehyun always makes sure to wrap his arms around you to finger your clit until you go into sensory overload and he doesn’t stop pounding into you until there are tears in your eyes. He kisses each one away before taking your lips in his and you can taste the salt water on his tongue.
He likes the dominance from eating you out.
He laps at your core like a starved man and makes good use of his adept fingers until your head is spinning. Jaehyun makes it a habit to eat you out until you’re satisfied before he gets his turn. When your thighs are on either side of his head and your hands tangled in his hair, he swears he can stay there forever.
Above all, Jaehyun just likes you. He likes being with you and he definitely likes fucking you and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
--
“Mmmh,” you breathe out.
Your back is flush against Jaehyun’s back as you rock your hips back and forth on his dick. You grind your ass back even harder when he pinches your nipple between his fingers.
He kisses your shoulder blade from behind and bucks his hip upward to meet you in the middle.
The afternoon sunlight is streaming in from the gaps of his blinds and you want to take it nice and slow today. The television in front of you is playing a movie, but you’re too enraptured by the feeling of him filling you to the brim to pay it any mind.
“I love it when you’re on top, babe.” he hums as he plays with your clit.
You let out another breathy groan before you can find the composure to bite back at him. “What happened to no sex today, hmm? I thought we were just going to have innocent quality time together and watch a movie.”
Jaehyun must’ve not liked your sass, so he bucks up harder. He’s telling you to pick up the pace and you oblige. Before you know, you’re practically bouncing on his dick and you can feel your impending high about to crash down on you. He can sense it too and maintains his tempo. When you cum, Jaehyun rides on the tail of your climax in pursuit of his own. He cums shortly after with stuttering hips and a bite on your shoulder. He gathers you in his arms and runs his tongue soothingly over where he bit you and the various love bites that he’s littered on the expanse of your skin.
“Just being with you is quality time in itself.” He says. “Besides, class is starting soon, so I won’t get to see you as much.”
7. Disturbance by BoA
a ripple on the surface.
“I didn’t know at first.”
“So I do have a roommate after all,” Yeri’s voice calls out and you turn over to see her standing by the doorway. You roll your eyes at her, but quickly turn back to gather your things.
She lets out a chuckle, but you don’t miss the sour edge to her tone. “I thought I got a single dorm since it’s so empty all the time.”
“You say that, Yeri,” you retort. “But I know you’re over at Mark’s constantly so I don’t wanna hear it from you.”
“Yeah, but I make time to come back here and I always let you know when I’m going out. I feel like I’ve only seen you maybe once or twice the past few months. I feel like the only reason I see you these days is ‘cause of classes.”
“You’re just exaggerating, don’t be so dramatic. Come on, let’s go. I don’t want to be late.”
She looks displeased, but nothing leaves her lips as the two of you head out for the day.
--
It’s late.
When night falls, shadows come out to play and your college campus is riddled with them. The school auditorium is situated in the far corner of the campus and the lamp lights of the main walkways do little, but you pay it little mind. Jaehyun should be getting out soon.
It takes another ten minutes to see him emerge from the double doors and you perk up immediately at the sight of him. He looks a little shocked to see you, but greets you with a warm hug and small peck regardless.
“Hey,” his voice is small, almost reserved. “What are you doing here? I thought I told you I was finishing late tonight.”
“Oh, you did, but I still wanted to see you.” You explain, eyes bright and tone undeterred.
“Not that I don’t appreciate it,” he licks his lip. “But it’s really late and I still have more stuff I need to work on. I’ll see you some other time, okay?”
“Oh, okay.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry, babe. Next time.”
--
“Oh hey,” you smile, but Yeri’s fury is palpable and cuts through you.
“Don’t ‘oh hey’ me.” She spits out. “Where have you been? Why didn’t you answer your phone?”
Sheepish, you reply, “oh sorry. I forgot to fully charge it before leaving and Jaehyun and I have different phones, so I couldn’t charge it at his place.”
“You were at Jaehyun’s?” Yeri is glaring at you at this point and you feel a bit peeved.
“Yeah. What of it?”
Yeri’s been getting angry at you recently, losing her temper at the drop of a hat, and you can’t seem to pinpoint why. You’re getting tired of being her punching bag.
“We made plans to go shop for Seulgi’s gift today. You promised you’d be there, don’t you remember?”
“Oh shit.” It completely slips from your mind and you open your mouth to apologize, but Yeri cuts you off before you get the chance.
“Forget it. I don’t want to hear it. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
Yeri turns to leave before you can say anything back.
8. Symptoms by SHINee
something’s wrong.
“The worse it gets, the more exhausted I get.”
Jaehyun feels off.
He can’t pinpoint exactly what he is that he’s feeling, but he thinks it’s reminiscent of his world being tilted by six degrees. It’s not immediately jarring and takes little time for his eyes to register, but he’ll occasionally bump his toe, signalling that this isn’t right. Things aren’t where they’re supposed to be. His head spins just the slightest bit and he feels woozy, but he doesn’t know why.
Jaehyun just feels off.
--
Jaehyun checks the bulletin board of his school auditorium almost religiously.
Each time before and after class, he’ll swing by and peruse the flyers that hang from haphazardly stuck on pins. He ignores the tutoring offers and the part time jobs scams, his main focus is almost always on the center of the board where they post the upcoming musical theatre production and eventually, the cast list.
This semester, the chosen production is La La Land and Jaehyun has been dead set on landing the role of Sebastian Wilder. He stays back extra late each day to practice the script and to work on his singing and annunciation.
On the day of the audition, he’s sure he’s nailed it and thinks to himself the world must be ending if he weren’t to get the leading role.
When he leaves the auditorium in a rush, excitement flows through his veins and he drinks in the night air as a toast of victory. He’s tipsy on his excitement and wants to laugh out loud, but in the corner of his vision, he sees you. Your eyes light up the sight up, outshining the moon and the stars, but your visage does not elicit the reaction he thinks it should. He expects his heart to swell and burst, but somehow he feels heavy.
He pulls you in for a hug and a quick kiss to quell his weighted heart, but he thinks he’s starting to sink so he calls you off for the night. He’ll see you next time.
Yeah, next time will be better.
--
You’re snuggled up close and personal on Jaehyun’s chest. Jaehyun notices you fill every nook and cranny of his being perfectly to a tee, and yet that feeling. It’s there again.
Jaehyun feels off.
You laugh at something one of the characters say and you cuddle harder into him. He feels heavy again and it makes his throat itch, so he swoops down and captures your lips.
It’s hard and fast to scrub away at his uneasiness and before he knows it, his clothes are missing, but so are yours. The foreplay is brief and almost impersonal, but he doesn’t care. He just needs to be inside you.
When Jaehyun has you begging and writhing, he feels like the world is where it should be. No longer is he living at a slight angle when he’s buried to the hilt inside your warmth, so when he sees you, he does what he can to get you out of your pants.
Today is no different from any other.
After a satisfying session you roll on his chest. Your kiss is soft and sweet despite the sweat that covers both of your bodies. He hums quietly as he taps melodies on along your exposed spine.
“Jaehyun?”
“Yeah?”
“I think I love you.”
Ah. Jaehyun thinks he’s getting it now, why he’s feeling off.
Jaehyun thinks he’s being suffocated.
--
To the surprise of no one, and especially not to him, Jaehyun gets the leading role of Sebastian Wilder in La La Land. He was a shoe-in for it anyway and he made sure to put in the work to get it.
His leading lady is someone by the name of Park Sooyoung, but at the first rehearsal she introduces herself as Joy.
“It’s nice to meet you.” She offers her hand out in a friendly greeting. “Here’s to a successful show together, Jaehyun.”
Her smile is blinding and he thinks Joy is a fitting name. He grasps her outstretched hand, grip firm and sure.
“Yeah,” he smiles back. “Here’s to a good show together.”
--
Rehearsals span over blurred minutes and long hours.
Jaehyun sees less and less of you and spends more and more time with her.
During a quick water break, he scans his phone briefly to see a text notification from you. He takes another swig of water and returns to the rehearsal.
It’s okay, he can always text you back later.
9. Before U Go - TVXQ!
letting go.
“I will leave now.”
“Come on!” You tug both Mark and Yeri along excitedly. “I want to get good seats.”
Yeri rolls her eyes, but obliges anyway, pulling Mark along. It’s opening night for Jaehyun’s big musical and you wanted to be there no matter what to support him. Johnny, Doyoung, Taeyong, Sicheng, and Seulgi are already inside waiting and you’re not sure if they were able to save the three of you a spot.
After a long chat with Yeri, you apologized profusely to her. You did get blinded by your relationship with him and prioritized him over everything, forgetting your friends and other responsibilities in the process. Yeri forgave you easily and helped keep you in line when you went to head over heels for Jaehyun.
However, after patching things up with Yeri, you begin to notice a shift in your relationship with Jaehyun’s. You’re not quite sure how to describe it, but it almost feels like a distance almost.
You chalk it up to his busy rehearsal schedule and choose not to dwell on the topic, in fears of your wandering imagination. It should be fine. After his musical is over, he’ll be less busy and things will fall back into place.
Right?
“Over here!” Seulgi waves over excitedly.
The auditorium is starting to fill up and you want to get comfortable before the show starts.
Everyone greets each other in hushed tones and soon enough, the show starts.
Right. Everything will be fine.
--
Jaehyun does amazing.
Your eyes are trained on him the whole time and his singing has goosebumps pricking your skin. You can see the passion pour through him every time he’s on stage and you couldn’t be more proud.
A nagging feeling at the pit of your stomach points out the undeniable chemistry between him and his co-star, but you push it deep down and suppress it.
They’re actors, and they’re good at what they do.
Yeah. They’re just acting. Yeah. Acting.
--
When the curtains close, you’re the first to shoot out of your seat, eager to meet him backstage. You weave through the endless crowd of people, murmuring your ‘sorry’s’ and ‘excuse me’s’ as you pass by. You reach the base of the backstage and shoot a message to let him know you’re waiting. You hum to yourself when you happen to overhear a conversation playing out.
“You did so good, Jae.”
“No, you definitely carried the show.”
You turn up and you see them. Her eyes are almost soft and loving as she pulls your boyfriend in for a hug. They linger in the embrace longer than necessary and you clear your throat to catch his attention.
He jolts just the slightest bit when he sees you and immediately lets her go.
“Everyone’s waiting,” you say quietly.
“Okay,” he nods. “Let me go get my stuff in the back.”
Jaehyun leaves the two of you alone and you wait for him to get back.
When you leave, he waves goodbye to her and she smiles back.
--
Jaehyun’s celebration party is rowdy, but it’s to be expected when Johnny is the one hosting.
He books a table at the local club and even orders bottle service. The eight of you work your way through two whole bottles of tequila and are already on your third. Jaehyun is downing the shots at a quicker pace than usual and you’re a bit concerned, but you’re unable to say anything because when you try, he whisks himself away to the dance floor and strikes up a conversation with someone else.
You’re perturbed, but you say nothing. This is his celebration night and he can choose to enjoy it how he wishes.
By the end of the night, Jaehyun is noticeably drunk and you haul him outside to get a breath of fresh air in hopes of sobering up. He’s heavy, but you make it out the side door. You prop him up on your side as you lean on the grimy brick walls.
Months have passed and the weather is chilly.
Jaehyun’s body sways and he murmurs something in your ear. You don’t catch it the first time, the overwhelming smell of tequila overtaking your senses.
“What was that?”
He grumbles beneath his breath, steps staggering once more. He tries again, this time his words are crisp and clear and they cut into you in more ways than one.
“I think we should end it.”
For someone so drunk, he sounds so sober.
You’re at a loss for words. A part of you knew this was coming from his lack of enthusiasm around you and his decreased texts. Even the cold night air couldn’t keep your heartbreak at bay. You say nothing, but you understand the both of you knew it was a silent agreement.
You breathe out wisps of chilled air as Jaehyun’s inebriated body stays slumped over on your side.
--
You volunteer to take Jaehyun home.
You tuck him gently in bed making sure to prop him on his side in case he vomits during the night. You pour a glass of water and place an ibuprofen on his nightstand drawer for him in the morning.
You kiss him on the forehead one last time. You hope it conveys all of the things brewing in your heart at the moment, but you know it doesn’t.
Later, you leave his apartment with all of your belongings that you ever left there with the stars as your witness.
You never return to his place again.
10. Coffee Shop by B.A.P
what could’ve been.
“So without knowing, like a habit, I came here.”
Jaehyun wakes up to an empty bed.
Morning sunlight streams through his blinds and burns at his skin as a sign to get ready for the day. He blinks the drowsiness from his system and stretches his weary joints before heading to the bathroom to get ready for the day.
On his rare day offs, he allows his body to go on auto-pilot. He completely shuts his brain off and allows it to do whatever it chooses.
Today, it takes him back to the cafe.
His body knows where it’s going before it registers in his mind.
The barista manning the order counter is different, but the decorations are the same, still the same succulents hanging from the ceilings. He mulls over the menu and goes up to order.
“Can I get an iced caramel latte?” Jaehyun doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth, but he’s feeling nostalgic today.
“Of course! Here’s your total.”
He pays with a swipe of his card and the barista goes to work making his drink. He waits around by the counter and soon enough, his drink is ready. That particular table is empty, so he grabs a chair to sit. His first sip is overly saccharine, but he appreciates how the flavor mellows out by the end of it.
It’s been nearly a year since that night.
Jaehyun remembers waking up to a splitting headache and a dry mouth. He thought nothing of the prepared setup as he gulps the ibuprofen and the glass of water in one go. Nothing seemed amiss really until a few days later.
No one mentioned your name around him and he caught Seulgi giving him a look every now and then. Mark didn’t say much either, but Jaehyun felt him drifting away.
He thought he’d feel a lot more, but he didn’t. One day you were a part of his life and then the next day you weren’t. It really was that simple.
He kept in contact with Joy even after La La Land was over and maybe they were something more, but it didn’t last longer than a few weeks.
It didn’t feel right when he was with her. Again, something felt off, but a different kind of off.
Joy was the one to end things with him, but he didn’t mind too much.
He filled his days with study and practice and it wasn’t until he landed a job at his local theatre company that he realized.
It was you. It was always you and perhaps it still is you.
Maybe you were different. Maybe you were the one, but Jaehyun didn’t try.
He recalls feeling smothered. You were always there at the beginning, but he took that for granted.
There are a lot of things he regrets, but above all, he regrets not talking with you. He regrets not trying to work on it. He regrets being a coward and running away at the first signs of true emotions.
You weren’t perfect, but neither was he, but he should’ve stayed so the both of you could work it out together. Jaehyun always did take too long to find the courage to pursue what he wanted.
With a final sip, he finishes the drink and moves to throw it away. Then, he sees you. Here, in the flesh, in almost a year.
Your hair is longer, but your cheeks are still as rosy as ever. You walk up to order and Jaehyun thinks it’s a sign. He moves to greet you, but the doors open again and in walk Yeri and Seulgi. He watches you greet them warmly with wide open arms.
You always did give the best hugs.
Jaehyun watches the three of you chatter away and he feels acutely out of place in the little cafe. You look happy and he should move on.
He throws his finished cup in the trash can and moves to exit through the side door, but he moves too slowly.
“Jaehyun, is that you?” You call out. He looks into your steady gaze and almost feels shy.
“Yeah,” he’s quiet. “It’s been awhile.”
“It has,” you agree. “You look well.”
The smile you give him has him believing in second chances and maybe he’ll get it right this time.
Note: i am so sorry that the second part is a hot mess express smh… there were a lot of things i planned and intended that didn’t happen, but i’ll just take this as a learning experience and write and better story next time. thanks for taking the time to read this !! <3
masterlist.
#nctcreations#cznnet#neowritingsnet#jaehyun scenario#jaehyun fanfic#jaehyun smut#jaehyun angst#jaehyun fluff#nct scenario#nct fanfic#nct smut#nct angst#nct fluff
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Homebrew “Race”: Ghost-Possessed Human
“I’ve seen people possessed before, but this was odd. He let it take control. The ghost in his body flipped through a book, and cast dispel magic on the darkness before them. After it was done, it let him return into himself. He was tired, yes, but it allowed him back into control. What kind of ghost does that? What kind of person lets a ghost do that?” - Rivanna Eclum, townsfolk
Welcome to spooky month! I’ve been working on a ghost-possessed human character... (so that I can effectively play two characters at once) I thought I should share what I’ve been working on since we’ve figured out our mostly finalized version. It just needs some play testing. Without further ado, the ‘race’ details are under the cut!
“Race” Details
Second Life
You will have two character sheets of equal level. Roll two Full stats, assign as if two characters. The Race for your Human is a Variant Human without the Ability Score Increase (plus the additional features you gain from this race), the Race for your Ghost is set as the following. You only have access to one set of class features determined by who is in charge of the body at the time.
The Ghost’s hit points are Fixed according to their Class Hit Point Average + Constitution Modifier + level. Once you assign the sets, you will use the Human’s Constitution, Strength and Dexterity for the Ghost’s sheet.
Physical and Elemental damage goes to Human half’s hit points. Necrotic, Radiant and Psychic goes to Ghost half’s hit points.
Failing a saving throw on Destroy Undead automatically detracts your Ghostly Hit Points. During low levels (1-6), the Ghost is unconscious and hit points auto goes to 0. If your ghost half is reduced to 0 hit points, the ghost must make (un)death saving throws. Mid-level (7-14), your ghostly half takes 10d10 in damage. During high levels (15-20) 14d10 damage.
Healing spells still work on your ghostly half. When receiving healing you can put the healed hit points to whichever half you choose.
Your human half has vulnerability to spells and effects that affect Undead, and your creature type appears as Undead to spells. Your ghost half appears visible to True Sight and Ethereal Vision.
Ghostly Manifestations
Sensations of profound sadness, loneliness, and unfulfilled yearning emanate in areas you linger in. Strange sounds or unnatural silences create an unsettling atmosphere. Cold spots settle in rooms that have roaring fires. A choking stench might seep into the area, inanimate Objects might move of their own accord, and corpses might rise from the grave. The ghost has no control over these manifestations; they simply occur. Any of these effects can occur around you to DM Discretion. Suggested play-style: If you linger in a place or around a certain set of people for a prolonged period, roll a d100. You have a 25% chance of one of these effects occurring
Death’s Reminder
Attacks with similarity to what caused your ghostly half’s death have advantage unless your ghostly half is unconscious or expelled. (DM discretion. Discuss the cause of your ghostly half’s death before hand, and what attacks would cause this effect.)
Your human half gets tired much quicker than normal due to the stress of constant possession, and is more susceptible to Exhaustion than average humans. Suggested play-style: You have Disadvantage on checks related to exhaustion, or the Difficulty Class is higher for you.
Unconsciousness
If one of them goes unconscious, the other is pushed to the front. If unconscious due to damage, the one unconscious must still make death saves. If the Ghost fails their death saves, the human is no longer possessed, and your character acts as a normal Variant Human. If the Human half dies, the ghost is expelled and you will need to get to making a new character!
Traits
Ghostly Possession
As a random once per short or long rest feature, your ghost takes control of your Human half’s body. Your Human half is Incapacitated but aware, and your Alignment and Personality, Intelligence, Charisma and Wisdom switch to the ghost’s, and you can only use the Ghost’s class features and proficiency, unable to use your Human’s class features. (aka, switch to your Ghost Sheet) Both halves of your pair can telepathically communicate with each other, no matter which one is in control
(Alternate style: As a Long Rest feature, your ghost can choose to take control of your human half’s body, non-randomly.)
The ghost can end possession as a bonus action, (which lets your human half have control and they can’t restart it as per feature requirement) with a Contested Wisdom check, no matter if the other character wants to be in control or not. When you are in Combat, instead of a Contested Wisdom check, you can end the possession as a bonus action at will but gain +1 level of exhaustion.
This feature automatically ends if your ghost hits 0 hit points, are affected by Destroy Undead or Dispel Evil and Good and other similar spells.
Ability Score Switch
Instead of a race Ability Score Increase, your Ghostly Possession allows you to change your Charisma, Intelligence, and Wisdom.
Withering Touch
When the Ghost is in possession of the body, you know the Chill Touch Cantrip, as a melee touch attack. You can cast it at will twice a day.
Age
Your human half ages slightly faster. Your ghost half is Undead, and can not age.
Alignment
Humans and Ghosts tend toward no particular alignment. You choose one Alignment for both halves.
Size
Your size is Medium.
Speed
Your base walking speed is 30 feet.
Darkvision
When the Ghost is in possession of the body, you have superior vision in dark and dim conditions. You can see in dim light within 60 feet of you as if it were bright light, and in darkness as if it were dim light. You can’t discern color in darkness, only shades of gray.
Ghostly Resistance
Both the Human and Ghost have Necrotic resistance.
Languages
You can speak, read, and write Common, one other language, and one language that your Ghost knew in life.
Alternate Version
Instead of having two sheets, you act as a multi-classed character. Your human half is your level one class. You roll two stat sets, switching your Alignment, Charisma, Wisdom and Intelligence when you activate your Ghostly Possession. You have one additional proficiency from your Ghost half. You roll the Hit Points, splitting the die between your Human and Ghost halves according to their multi-classed levels. You can use both class features.
Additional alternate features and effects (scrapped from my version due to avoiding getting too OP):
A) Your Ghostly half have advantage on saving throws against being charmed and frightened. You must make separate saving throws for your Human half.
B) Used to working in tandem, if your ghostly half is separated from your human half while both are conscious, you must use your action or bonus action to request your ghostly half to perform an action or bonus action. Otherwise, they will take the Dodge or Help action. You otherwise do not have access to their class features. (Using this option means the ghost can be pushed out of the body from Turn Undead, Dispel Evil and Good, and other spells)
#ghost#dnd ghost#dnd human#dnd#dnd homebrew#homebrew race#dnd homebrew race#kinda#possession#death mention#undead#firefly plays games#ghost and aven#thats my character lol#If anybody else wants to play a character like this pls!#and tell me how it works out when you try to play it!#I tried to make sure it was balanced but like... you're basically multi-classed at lvl one#It could turn out kinda..... too much. >w<#dnd:ghosty
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From what I understand of DND, every race or whatever has pros and cons--some are better are at magic, some more resistant to magic, some better at combat, etc for all the attributes you can have. If we're going to make a stink about "evil" races, why aren't we bitching about how some races are inherently less intelligent or less strong than others? Why are some more strong and more intelligent? Why are those things not focused on as racist and genocidal and morally relevant to the real world?
The mechanic of the game requires it to be like that. Otherwise there is no way to differentiate between the species, there is no way to say "here are the pros and cons of choosing one type of character over another". Why can't you have a bard that's really good at stealth or at magic or is really strong or more health points? Isn't that inherently racist too, that all the species you can choose must be differentiatied, inherently, and they aren't allowed to stand on equal merit with each other? Why do those things get a pass when "white people are more intelligent and healthier and better at everything" is what all of the racism accusations are based on? Why is it just the morality stat?
There is no way to have a game where there are classes of characters without, in some abstract way, invoking "racism", because that is the same concept if we're going to be negative and pedantic and paranoid and fundybrained about it. It is literally impossible to have a class based game with different merit points assigned based on species and not have that mechanic invoke.....racism, because is literally what it is. You cannot avoid that. The entire game is built on the concept of "different species have different merits". That's the entire mechanic. If you want a different mechanic, you're playing a different game. It's no different than Mario killing goombas and koopas simply because they're koopas and goombas. Somehow Mario doesn't get accusations of racism, and they're just "villains".
So, what's the point of the debate? Why have it? People want to go "See look I'm a good ally, I'm not racist." The only way anyone is given to demonstrate they're not racist is to climb on the accusation bandwagon and not pipe up for any reason. Like most other sj stuff, you can't say "that's bullshit" without people screeching that you're bigoted. And like most other sj stuff, it's all based on FEELING, personal affront and distaste, not on whether the reality is actually what people are claiming it is: "I have thoughts about racism when I look at this thing, so therefore this thing is racist, and if they deny their racism, that means they're fascists and genocidal, not that I'm wrong and projecting." It's hyperattribution. What's the point of that? Same reason anyone wants power, same reason fundybrained stuff has always been weaponized.
Okay, @postsforposting I'm going to pick on you, and know ahead of time I respect you, but you really helped me put my finger on something that drives me up the wall about debates on "evil races" in Dungeons and Dragons.
The argument about so-called "Evil Races" is an argument about internal motives.
Let's say that in your D&D module, you have a human kingdom that is currently suffering raids from a group of marauding Orcish bandits. There is a pop culture argument about how you, as the module author (And by extension, how DMs using your module) ought to explain why these Orcs are marauding bandits:
One explanation that has a lot of fans is, "Orcs are an 'evil race'." What is meant by this is that Orcs lack the ability to be other than bandits. Every Orc, without exception, has an evil alignment; despite variations between individuals, the Orcish psyche causes them to become marauding bandits, and they are by nature psychologically incapable of arranging themselves into an alternative social order. That they are marauding bandits is an expression of a fundamental drive to become marauding bandits which is present in all orcs (save perhaps one or two exceptional beings).
I don't want to even get into whether that explanation is "good" or "bad", just that this is what is meant by "evil race" and that this definition seems, to me, to have a wide agreement on both sides of the debate. When you hear someone say, "Evil race" this is what they are describing.
Contrasted to the evil race is something that doesn't really have a name, let's call it the "neutral race". This is a competing explanation that proponents want you to put into your module and game. Essentially, they want the motive for your marauding bandits to be something other than "Orcs are an evil race". They want you to make it clear that Orcs have the exact same psychological, emotional, and intellectual capacities as modern humans. This band of Orcs might be marauding bandits, but their motives are contingent and independent of their race. Another band of Orcs, across the hill over there, might be peaceful farmers. Orcs can have any alignment, and while these ones might be evil, that's just them, and it has nothing to do with being Orcs.
Again, not commenting on whether this is "Good" or "Bad", I just want to articulate that this is a possible view.
So, the argument is about whether antagonists in D&D should be described as evil races, and, I really really want to emphasize this:
Everyone involved in the debate recognizes that a group of marauding bandits might or might not be an evil race. The fact of their marauding banditry is not sufficient to determine whether they are part of an evil race.
And everybody nods their head and goes, "Yeah, that's obviously what we're debating" until I mention that, in my opinion, most historical mythology doesn't deal with evil races.
At which point the agreed on terms of the debate are just chucked out the window and replaced with something else:
"the romans had the "barbarian hordes" who was "everyone who was not us". the greeks before them were the same. nobody invented "people who are less than us" because it's always been assumed. who is us and who is them would change constantly, but it has always existed.
The fact that the Romans had "Barbarian hordes" does nothing to tell us whether or not they had "evil races" in the sense used in this debate, because the very terms of the debate assume that barbaric behavior is not sufficient to establish that someone is an 'evil race' in the sense that we are talking about!
If barbaric behavior (And the idea that barbaric behavior should be dealt with by violence) are all we mean by 'evil race' then the entire debate is simply gibberish. The distinction I drew above cannot hold, and it is fundamentally impossible to get rid of evil races, because even if the author says that the marauding orcish bandits are part of a race that can have peaceful farmers, well, they still engage in barbarism and are therefore "less than us" by definition.
This anonymous question:
Regarding the DnD Orc posts:
What would be a less problematic way of describing a fantasy “race”/“species” that is meant to be “evil” and “vile”, (because maybe they were created by a evil deity to cause havoc etc).
Becomes utterly incomprehensible, because any creation of an antagonistic group is creation of a barbaric group and therefore, creation of an evil race.
The entire assumption of this debate, the foundation on which it is built, is that a group of "barbarians" might be an evil race, or they might not.
And having loads of people come at me going "Well, the Romans had barbarians so by definition they believed in evil races" drives my up the wall because, not only do I disagree (I think that heroism of antiquity was generally uninterested in the inborn capacities of the enemy, and was more concerned with the fact that they were the enemy) saying this is a complete rejection of the entire debate, but it's phrased as though it comes down on one side.
This sort of oscillation, between drawing the distinction between evil races and mere villains and then immediately acting like there is no possible distinction really, really, really irritates me.
Like, a lot. It's one of my bigger pet peeves.
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Ive been thinking about Veth's summer camp and I have some headcannons. Mainly it falls into: how would this work for a backstory? Because a level 1 adventurers have higher stats and more proficienes than your basic npc, so why is that? Well, this summer camp is here to help!
There's variations in themes between a week long, month long, and 2 month camp.
Week long options are mostly for younger kids or those learning the basics, each day is themed around a stat
Theres the proficiency week camp where kids learn about the skills useful to adventures (animal handling/horse back riding is a popular day)
The Class Camp divides the dnd classes by stats, (int day is a general magic day as you cant teach someone how to be a warlock or socercer but you can teach them how magic works), this is an intro to the classes, weapons, and general overview of each class, if the kids are pld enough or interested enough, they may want to attend the longer camps
In the 2 month and month long camps, there are cabins for the kids to spend the night
The cabins are named after the members of the mighty nein, and yes, there are more than nine cabins
Each cabin name plate is decorated by Jester to reflect who they were named after
Sometimes cabin assignment is based on class, sometimes its based on personality
Each of the mighty nein has an open invite to be a counseler or a guest speaker and yes, they stay in the cabin named after them
Since the longer camps are for the older kids, they get more in-depth training about their chosen classes
There are field trips and group activities that require the campers to form their own parties
Like capture the flag or an obstacle course rely race or mock battles
It's chaos and the kids love it
At the end of the month and 2 month sessions, there's a presentation day where they can show off their skills
For the kids who want this to be a career, this is when they have the opportunity to show off to the Cobalt Soul, the Cerberus Assembly, and other adventuring organizations thr mighty nein have made connections with, including some from the dynasty side
I imagine it a bit like a scholarship program?? If that makes sense?
And I imagine if Jester and Fjord take over his old orphanage, this would also be opportunity for the more adventurous kids to be taken as a ward of those organizations and find a loving family that way.
And maybe for the kids who dont get adopted, they end up taking the last name of the cabin they stayed in
So maybe there are more widowgast wizards or lionettt monks, but there's also clay rangers, a lavorre bards, stone barbarians, and the like
And uh yeah, basically i love the idea of an adventuring summer camp. (Can you imagine the camp songs????? And the camp culture that would arise???)
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Not all math puns are awful, just sum (sterek fic, high school au)
ao3 link: click if you dare
summary: ’what is the probability that anyone will pass this fucking class? I’m thinking 1 in 100’
Stiles shakes his head because that was such a bad math joke that it was actually kinda funny. And, based on the expressions on people’s faces during class, also very true.
'i think there is statistical data to back up your theory’
AU where Stiles and Derek have to share a textbook and they write terrible math puns back and forth to each other.
Stiles sincerely, genuinely, regrets taking AP classes.
Well, kinda.
They would look great on his resume. Colleges wouldn’t even second guess accepting him and he would receive so many scholarships which would help his dad big time.
AP classes will also raise his GPA crazy high which, again, looks great to colleges.
Sometimes they just suck.
His AP Statistics class is definitely #1 on the ‘classes that suck straight ass list’.
It’s boring and it can be kinda hard. Plus it’s math so it’s automatically gross.
Stiles is good at math, but it’s not his forte, that’s more Lydia Martin’s thing.
Anyway, Beacon Hills High had to have some budget cuts this year, like, serious budget cuts. The sports teams are lucky that people care about people throwing balls all over the place, otherwise they would’ve gotten cut too.
Since the school has had budget cuts, the students don’t get individual textbooks anymore. Meaning, that they can only use it during class and then they have to leave it in the classroom for the next class to use.
So, yeah.
It’s the third week of junior year, AP Stat is as boring as always. He has Lydia to talk to sometimes but she has other friends in the same class, so he's not always entertained.
The teacher didn’t really care about whether or not students did the work, he just played chess on his computer the whole class anyway. He gave the page number that we were supposed to work on and that was that.
Stiles prefers that to lectures, but still. When he’s done the work there’s nothing left for him to do. He could go on his phone, but even that gets boring eventually.
What he’s trying to say is that he’s bored, okay?
Turning to the page that the teacher assigned, Stiles is shocked and wildly amused, to already see writing on the margins of the page. He figured it would take at least half the school year before people started vandalizing the textbooks. Although, it’s written in pencil so it’s easily erasable.
When Stiles actually reads what was written he snorts. Luckily, it’s loud in the class so the most attention he gets is when Lydia shoots him a weird look which he ignores.
'what is the probability that anyone will pass this fucking class? I’m thinking 1 in 100'
Stiles shakes his head because that was such a bad math joke that it was actually kinda funny. And, based on the expressions on people’s faces during class, also very true.
Should he write something back? Stiles doesn’t know if the person who wrote this is hoping for a response, or if they wrote in the book because they’re just as bored as Stiles is.
Eh, fuck it. Why not?
'i think there is statistical data to back up your theory’
Stiles snickers at his equally bad math joke before finally deciding to focus on the actual work. He didn’t want to be one of the ones who didn’t pass the class, because that would suck. So he does the work and for the remainder of the class he lets out a giggle or two every once in a while because even though he’s 16 years old, he apparently still has the sense of humor of a child.
π π π
It’s the next class and honestly, Stiles kind of forgot about the writing in the textbook. After he left that class he went to AP Geography where there was immediately a test, which he nailed by the way. Plus, with all his other classes, he just didn’t think it was important to remember a bad, but still funny, math joke in a textbook.
The teacher assigns them another page number full of questions to work on. And, just like last time, there’s writing in the margins.
‘i’m sorry, that was pretty mean of me to say’
That one has Stiles laughing out loud. Not too loud though, because he doesn’t have that much of a death wish. He just laughs loud enough to make Lydia send him another weird look, except this time Lydia questions him about it.
“What is so funny?” she asks, twirling her hair with her pencil.
Stiles shakes his head. “Nothing really. Just somebody writing lame math jokes on the book pages.”
“Well, you’re laughing at them. So doesn’t that make you lame as well?”
Stiles dramatically gasps.
“Wow, Lydia, that was pretty mean of you to say,” Stiles replies before bursting into more laughter.
At this point, Lydia is looking at him like he has brain damage but he really can’t bring himself to care. It’s hilarious and if she doesn’t think so then oh well. Her loss.
Well, she doesn’t know that that was the joke inside the textbook, but still, whatever.
It’s funny.
π π π
By this point, it’s kind of like Stiles and this unknown jokester are pen pals.
It’s been a week filled with terrible math jokes and Lydia probably losing more and more respect for him as the days pass.
He’s told Scott about his little pen pal and of course, Scott doesn’t really get it, but he’s supportive nonetheless.
It’s a Friday night and Scott is at Stiles’ house. They’re playing video games and eating so much pizza that Stiles will be bloated for an entire week.
Thankfully, his dad is on the night shift, otherwise, he would be heavily judgmental of Stiles’ life choices.
After several rounds of Mario Kart, they take a break to eat said pizza and talk a bit.
“So,” Scott takes a huge bite of his slice. “how are you and your math buddy doing?”
Stiles takes a bite of his own slice. “Why are you asking? Jealous?”
Scott laughs. “Oh yeah, I’m so jealous. Please, Stiles, make terrible math jokes with me.”
Stiles flips Scott off. “You only mock because you really are jealous.”
Scott rolls his eyes and then the topic is dropped.
At least for the next hour or so. Then after that, it gets brought back up.
“Do you think it’s weird to have a crush on someone you’ve never met?” Stiles asks, playing with a loose thread on his jeans.
Scott looks at Stiles, and Stiles does not want to see the weird look Scott has on his face so he continues looking down.
“You have a crush on this person?”
Stiles shrugs. “I don’t know. They’re funny, and obviously, they’re smart if they’re in AP Stat. I would like to meet this person though, maybe. I don’t know.”
Stiles feels his cheeks heating up.
Scott nudges Stiles with his elbow. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s not weird at all. It’s kinda like online dating, but like medieval style.”
Stiles can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of his throat. “What?”
It’s like medieval style! ‘Cause, it’s in a book. Instead of online.”
Scott is always able to make Stiles feel better, no matter the situation. His goofiness especially lightens his mood.
“Okay, Scott. Are we going to go jousting next?”
“I don’t know. What you guys do on your first date is none of my business,” Scott says with a sly smile.
Stiles snorts and grabs a pillow off the couch behind them and smacks Scott in the face with it, resulting in a pillow fight ensuing.
And if anybody asks, Scott did not win. He didn’t!
π π π
2 weeks after he and Scott had that talk, Stiles continues talking with his pen pal. Although, maybe Stiles is looking too deep into this, but it kind of seems like flirting now?
Hear him out.
In the margins, the person started adding smiley faces and winky faces after every message.
Ooh and they actually put their initials! D.H.
Stiles doesn’t think he knows anyone in school with those initials. Granted, Stiles isn’t exactly a social butterfly so he’s not doubting their existence at all.
AP Stat only has 5 minutes left in the class. Stiles has already embarrassed himself in front of Lydia more times than he can count, so he decides to ask Lydia if she knows someone with those initials.
She purses her lips. “Why do you ask?”
Stiles sighs inwardly before answering. “Uh, well. I was just...wondering. Ya know. Trying to expand my friend circle.”
Lydia raises an eyebrow. And Stiles sighs outwardly this time.
“Fine. You know the jokes that were in the book?”
“You mean from like a month ago?”
“Well...we’ve kinda been continuing to exchange jokes and notes and stuff. And then recently they put their initials. Or, at least I think it’s their initials. I don’t know what else it would be. So, yeah.”
Lydia looks at him for a moment before her lips curl up into a smile. “You mean you’ve finally found someone who has a worse sense of humor than you?”
Stiles returns the smile. “I’ll have you know, my sense of humor is advanced. Way too advanced even for you.”
“Uh-huh. Anyway, the only name that comes to mind is Derek Hale.”
Stiles chokes on his own spit. “Derek Hale? You mean the star of the basketball team? The guy with eyes that are like fifty different colors and bunny teeth that would look ridiculous on anyone else but he somehow looks gorgeous with them? That Derek Hale?”
“Yes. Other than that, I don’t know anyone else with those initials.”
“Does he take AP Stat?”
Lydia shrugs. Stiles takes that as a no.
There’s no way that Derek Hale is the one writing these notes. No way in hell. Stiles isn’t that lucky.
Plus, even if Derek is the one writing these, hypothetically speaking, Derek wouldn’t be interested in him. Don’t get Stiles wrong, he knows he’s a pretty attractive guy. But nobody in this school is as attractive as Derek Hale. Let's be real here.
Okay, maybe Danny. Danny is kinda gorgeous.
But besides Danny, nobody is even on the same level as Derek.
Well, Lydia is too.
Okay, dammit. People are on the same level as Derek Hale. The point is that Stiles isn’t.
Stiles sighs for what seems like the eighth time in. “Okay. Thanks.”
Lydia gives him a scrutinizing look before nodding and getting on her phone.
Stiles sits there and ponders why his life is like this before deciding that he must've done something to piss off fate in a past life. Pleased with his conclusion, Stiles shoves his notebook and pencils into his backpack just in time for the bell to ring.
π π π
Okay, so, Stiles must be going crazy.
When he saw that his pen pal had written his initials he figured, ‘hey, I might as well do the same. It’s only decent right?’ so he had, and ever since then Derek Hale has been shooting him looks in the hallway.
Maybe he’s hallucinating, because Derek Hale is, well, Derek Hale. Out of everyone in the hallway, why would he be looking at Stiles?
Also, Stiles can’t be the only person in the school with the initials S.S. although, he probably is the only S.S. that’s taking AP Stat so there’s that.
Stiles doesn’t know what to do, should he wave? Shoot him a smile?
Actually no, he should do neither of those things because if he does, and Derek actually wasn’t looking at him, that would be so unbelievably embarrassing. So embarrassing that Stiles would have to transfer schools immediately.
Stiles shakes his head and opens up his locker to gather his things for his next class. When he closes the locker Derek is standing right there like they’re in a horror movie and Stiles jumps so hard that he drops his notebook.
“Shit. Sorry,” Derek says and bends down to swipe Stiles’ notebook off the floor.
“No, it’s okay. You’re awfully quiet for an athlete.”
Stiles holds his hand out for his notebook but Derek doesn’t seem all that interested in returning it to him just yet. Derek looks at the front of his notebook.
“Hmm. AP Stat. Interesting.”
Stiles bites his lip and nods. “Yep,” he says popping the ‘p’. “it is interesting. Well, actually it’s not. AP Stat is yuck sometimes and it can get boring but it’ll look great on my resume so.”
Derek nods. He looks at Stiles for a few more seconds before he opens his mouth, and the second he does, Stiles’ stomach fills with butterflies.
“What is the probability that anyone will pass that fucking class? I’m thinking 1 in 100.”
Stiles bites his lip to stifle his smile. He doesn’t want to cheese like an idiot in front of Derek Hale but he thinks that ship has already sailed cause Derek’s lips stretch into a big smile.
Stiles clears his throat. “I think there is statistical data to back up your theory.”
“Oh, is there?” Derek asks, smile turning into a smirk.
Stiles nods then looks at his notebook that is still in Derek’s hand. “Can I have my notebook now? I’m not sure what exactly you’re plotting but I don’t like it.”
Derek scrunches his face up. “Wow, that was bad.”
Stiles’ mouth gapes. “Like yours were any better.”
Derek shrugs, smile returning to his face. “I thought my mean joke was pretty hilarious.”
“Yeah, hilariously bad. I didn’t laugh at all, not one bit.”
Derek looks like he doesn’t believe a word Stiles just said, which is fair, he shouldn’t.
“So,” Derek begins, eyes boring into Stiles’— seriously, what is up with Derek’s eyes? — “what is the probability that you will give me your number?”
Stiles pretends to think about it for a second. “I'm thinking 100 in 100.”
#stiles stilinski#derek hale#Sterek#sterek fic#high school au#quite possibly the worst math jokes ever in existence#my fic
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