#i am usually so unaffected by this
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listening to the cc music on shuffle (bad idea) and being strangely floored by something written (very unexpected) and now i cant stop thinking about CLEVER BOY!!!!
#i am usually so unaffected by this#im hormonal methinks#well... meknows#but wow that never normally gets me#59 second timestamp particularly got to me#nomrally my tears are reserved for expecto patronum and burning bed#time to touch grass
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okay so this is not an âofficialâ metric by any scale but i am curious so i just bullshitted my own (explanation on levels under the poll)
level 1 - canât tolerate horror at all, actively avoids it at all costs
level 2 - will watch a horror movie with friends/family if convinced but will definitely not enjoy it. screams at jumpscares and covers eyes at tense moments
level 3 - can occasionally consume horror media. very easily startles at jumpscares. usually feels anxious/paranoid afterward
level 4 - startles at jumpscares and generally feels uneasy after consuming horror media. avoids anything horror-related at night time
level 5 - jumpscares are less effective, but can still startle. feels anxious during tense moments. horror mostly causes unease only at night time
level 6 - has no problem consuming any kind of horror media alone at night. is largely unaffected by jumpscares. horror causes no feeling of fear or anxiety
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Wydm Richard is born on *october 2nd*
#i am in pain#itâs that kind of numb pain#that haunts me#dry pain#i am usually unaffected so this says a lot abt how great this work is#baraou no souretsu#literally losing my mind
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.đĽ Ý Ë we listen & we donât judge .đĽ Ý Ë
âď¸ . . . genre. fluff
âď¸ . . . pairings. bakugou x influencer!reader
⤿ bakugou and yn did the we listen and we donât judge trend.
âWhy the hell are we doing this again?â Bakugou grumbled, arms crossed as he sat on the edge of the couch, glaring at your phone like it personally offended him. You were fiddling with the tripod, humming a happy tune, completely unaffected by his usual sour mood.
âBecause itâs fun, Katsuki,â you chirped, stepping back to check the angle. âAnd because I said so.â
âTch. Stupid trend,â he muttered, but his scowl faltered when you gave him that lookâthe one where your eyes sparkled with excitement. âFine, whatever. Letâs get this over with.â
You grinned, plopping down beside him and nudging his shoulder. âSee? That wasnât so hard. Now remember the rulesââwe listen, and we donât judge.ââ
âLike Iâd judge you,â he scoffed, though his ears turned a faint pink. âJust hit record already.â
You hit the record button and waved at the camera. âOkay, weâre doing the âWe Listen and Donât Judgeâ challenge! Iâll start!â Turning to him, you smiled mischievously. âAlright, Katsuki. The first time I saw you in your hero costume, I thought your gauntlets looked like giant grenade-shaped marshmallows.â
He blinked at you, his jaw dropping. âMarshmallows?! What the hell is that supposed to mean?!â
âTheyâre poofy!â you laughed, covering your mouth. âLike, in a cute way! I love them now, though!â
âYou think Dynamightâthe badass heroâlooks cute?!â he snapped, his glare sharp enough to cut steel. âUnbelievable.â
âHey! We listen, and we donât judge!â you reminded him, trying not to giggle at how genuinely offended he looked.
âFine,â he muttered, leaning back against the couch. âMy turn. That time you made me tea when I was sick? I dumped it down the sink because I thought it looked weird.â
Your jaw dropped. âAre you kidding me?! I made that tea with so much love! I even Googled the recipe!â
âIt looked like sludge, YN,â he shot back, smirking now. âI wasnât gonna risk dying over tea.â
âWow, Katsuki. Wow,â you deadpanned, trying to hide your laugh. âWe listen, and we donât judge, right?â
âYeah, yeah,â he said, waving his hand. âYour turn.â
You tapped your chin, pretending to think hard. âOkay, remember that time you thought the washing machine was broken because it kept making weird noises?â
âDonât tell meâŚâ he said, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.
âIt wasnât broken,â you admitted, biting your lip. âI accidentally put one of your gloves in there, and it got stuck.â
âWhat?!â he groaned, throwing his head back. âAre you serious?! I spent an hour fixing that stupid thing!â
âWhoops,â you said innocently, leaning away from him as he glared at you. âWe listen, and we donât judge!â
âWhatever,â he grumbled. âLast one, and weâre done.â
You raised an eyebrow, curious about what heâd say. He smirked, leaning forward slightly. âRemember that time I told you I couldnât hang out because I had extra patrol shifts?â
You nodded slowly. âYeahâŚ?â
âI lied,â he confessed. âI stayed home because I wanted to finish watching that stupid rom-com you made me start. It was too good, alright?!â
You gasped dramatically, clapping your hands. âYou mean The Proposal?! Oh my god, Katsuki! You liked it!â
âShut up!â he snapped, cheeks blazing. âI didnât say I liked itâI said it was decent.â
âYou were laughing so hard at the Sandra Bullock scenes!â you teased, scooting closer to poke his cheek. âAdmit itâyouâre a closet rom-com fan!â
âLike hell I am!â he barked, swatting your hand away. âNext time, weâre watching something with explosions.â
âSure, sure,â you said, rolling your eyes. âBut youâre not off the hook yetâwhatâs your favorite part of the movie?â
âIâm not answering that,â he muttered, crossing his arms.
âCome on, Katsuki,â you teased, leaning against his shoulder. âWe listen, and we donât judge.â
He grumbled something under his breath, refusing to meet your gaze. Finally, he muttered, âThe grandma dancing part was kinda funny.â
You burst out laughing, grabbing his arm as he groaned in embarrassment. âOh my god, youâre so cute!â
âShut up, idiot,â he growled, but his lips twitched into a small, begrudging smile as he pulled you closer. âThis trendâs stupid, but I guess it wasnât that bad.â
You smiled up at him, resting your head against his shoulder. âAdmit itâyou had fun.â
âMaybe,â he said, wrapping an arm around you. âBut donât think Iâll do another one of these dumb trends.â
âWhatever you say, Dynamight,â you teased, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek as the camera caught his flustered reaction.
âCut the damn recording already!â he barked, his blush deepening.
#jxwl4k#x reader#anime#fanfic#mha bakugou#bakugou katsuki#my hero academia#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou fluff#bnha bakugo katsuki#bakugou x y/n#bakugou fanfiction#katsuki bakugou#bnha bakugou#katsuki bakugo mha#mha katsuki bakugo#katsuki x y/n#bakugou katuski x reader#katsuki x you#bnha oneshot#bnha#mha oneshot#mha
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sukuna x gn!reader; fluff; established relationship; no-curses!au
âWhy are you so pretty?â Â
Sukuna turns his head to your figure that is sprawled lazily on your couch, your own head hanging upside down on the headrest, blinking at him owlishly. His gaze, which had just been focused on the cutting board in front of him - where he was preparing the late-night snack you requested - is now focused on you, interrupted by your unexpected words.
âAre you mad?â
âYes.â A dopey smile stretches across your face, high on whatever feelings are rushing through your body at that moment. âMadly in love with you.â
Sukuna glances at you, a deadpan look, though your eyes catch the flush that colors his cheeks, barely noticeable, soft and oh so pretty. Betraying his nonchalant exterior.
âGo to sleep.â
âAww, câmon, I can see you blushing!â
âTch, donât be weird,â he grumbles, face turned to the side, before abandoning his task and making his way to the couch, putting you in a headlock, ignoring your shoves and squeals.
Sukuna finally releases you after you try to bite his arm, your teeth almost leaving a mark (not that he'd actually mind). As you sit up, disheveled and catching your breath, his large hand wanders to the back of your head, a careful grip, and he stares down at you with half-lidded eyes.
To an outsider, your boyfriend would probably appear unaffected, perhaps even threatening. But as his partner, someone who knows him too well, you can quickly recognize the softened edges around his eyes, the glint in the maroon of his irises. It never fails to spread warmth throughout your entire body, and you have to stop yourself from burying your face in his broad chest.
âYouâve been trying to tease me a lot lately, you brat,â he drawls, scratching his nails along your nape.
You hum, tipping your head back into his pleasant touch and giving him a short, firm nod. "I am. It's because of your reactions, they're really cute."
Sukuna immediately grimaces at your words and stops scratching, his eyebrows drawn together as his lips fall into something awfully resembling a pout. Like an angry cat, you think to yourself.
âDonât use that word with me.âÂ
You roll your eyes and bring a finger up to his face to smooth the wrinkled space between his furrowed brows.
âOh, get over it. What do you want me to say? Hardcore?â
He pretends to bite your finger, sharp canines lightly scraping the skin while another unhinged giggle escapes your lips at the playful gesture.
âIâd prefer if you didnât say anything at all.â
A snort leaves you as you wave a hand dismissively at him.
âYeah, yeah, if that were the case then you wouldnât be with me in the first place.â Â
Suddenly, his other hand reaches up and squeezes your cheeks, causing your lips to form an 'o'. He shakes your head from side to side, gently, eyes never leaving your face.
"You run your mouth way too much."
"M'only matching your energy," you manage to mumble and he lets go of your face.
A click of his tongue, âYou wanna die?â
âUhh, Iâm so scared,â you taunt him, the corners of your mouth lifting up, knowing that his threats are just empty words. His own way of showing love, one could say.
His hand, the same one that just squeezed your cheeks, then travels down to wrap around your waist and your lips part immediately at the sensation. But instead of giving it a light squeeze like he usually does, he pinches your side, making you yelp and slap his hand away. Â
âStop!â
"You asked for it," he shrugs, and you can see him trying to fight off a smile that threatens to spread across his face. You're tempted to tease and coo at him again, but you're afraid of what he might do to you, unsure if you'd survive. Â
You let out a loud sigh, "All this just because I called you pretty. How sensitive of you."
His brows rise and this time he doesn't hold back a smile, threatening and promising nothing good.
âOh, Iâll show you sensitive."
a/n: wrote this bc i'm lowkey procrastinating my toji fic whoopsie hehe
#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#fluff#sukuna fluff#drabble#sukuna x reader fluff
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I'm making a concerted effort to fix my sleep cycle at the moment because I know it's going to be one of the first things the new neurologist pounces on when I eventually see her in September.
And I don't know what's different this time, but all the sleep hygiene stuff that has never worked for me in the 30 years I've been dealing with chronic insomnia is actually starting to help.
I'm falling asleep earlier and staying asleep for longer, which is huge considering I've been running at a sleep deficit for about 30 years, usually getting less than 4-5 hours of broken sleep a night.
The only thing I can think it might be is that my MCAS being more stable means I'm not experiencing adrenaline surges late at night.
See, the body dumps histamine as part of the circadian rhythm, and if you don't have mast cell instability, you're usually asleep for this and unaffected (though some people may notice allergic symptoms get worse at night). For me, it always felt like going over the drop of a rollercoaster if the rollercoaster consisted of tachycardia and shaking for a couple of hours. So, I usually choose to stay awake so I can mediate it.
And I'll confess, despite my MCAS being more stable, it never occurred to me that it might make practicing good sleep hygiene easier, so I just... kind of haven't bothered???
Anyway, imagine my surprise when the sleep app I've been using to track my sleep for the last few weeks informed me that I'm falling asleep within 20 minutes of putting my phone down and that I'm actually staying asleep for close to 6 hours at a time.
Also, my body is starting to anticipate going to bed???
It's 8:22 p.m. here, and I just caught myself thinking, "Oh boy, I can't wait to go to bed in an hour."
Absolutely wild. Like, who even am I anymore?
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author's note: an idea sprung up in my head where vi and reader are co-workers who hate each other but ACTUALLYâ
summary: vi's been a constant pain in your ass for ages; a co-worker who lives to irritate you mercilessly. until things come to a head and a secret is unraveled.
cw: modern day, co-workers, office au, vi x f!reader
"I fucking hate you."
"Oh, that hurts my heart, princess."
"Don't call me that."
"What? Princess?"
Your pen nearly snaps in half due to the death grip you have it in. You're absolutely furious; your rage is a burning force bubbling away at the pit of your stomach. It's hot enough to have your heart racing, thundering loudly in your chest as your blood roars in your ears.
"I swear to god, Violet," you hiss dangerously, your eyes narrowing into thin slits. "Call me that one more time, and I'll strangle you with my bare hands."
Vi raises a brow, frustratingly unaffected. "Promise?" She says, lips curving into a mocking smile, and oh, your vision goes red for a second.
Your mind drifts to all the horrible things you could do to Vi. In graphic detail. And that seems to calm you down, which should be concerning. But you can't afford to get into an all-out fight with her, in the middle of a work day, while your co-workers mill about.
Knowing them, they're just waiting for this to happen. And you can't afford to give them that satisfaction, so you take a deep breath, attempting to cool your system down.
Then you hand over the documents to Vi, emotionless, as you say, "Deal with this."
Vi, noticing that you've tapped out from your usual brawl, eyes you for a second before replying, "Sure thing."
With that, you turn to walk away so you can leave this space. But before you can even make it to the door, Vi's opening her big mouth to say:
"Princess."
It's hard for you not to lose your mind after that.
"Is this going to be a common occurrence?" Mel asks, already tired as she looks between the two of you. "I mean, we already had the fiasco a week ago where you two were yelling at each other in the break roomâ"
"She started it," you interrupt with a mumble, shying away when Mel aims a warning look your way.
"I don't care who stared it," Mel retorts before leaning back in her chair with a heavy sigh. "I just expect more from my employees. I expect harmonious working relationships, not arguments that turn into screaming matches. If this happens again, there's going to be serious consequences. Am I understood?"
"Yes, Ms Medarda." You and Vi grumble in unison, and you're soon walking out of her office. You immediately start towards your desk, wanting to get far from Vi because your anger has yet to subside. It wasn't your fault that this happened; all Vi had to do was take the documents you handed her, but no, she had to turn it into something else.
And now Mel's got her eye on you, which is the last thing you need andâ
"Hey."
That's Vi's voice, calling out to you, and the last thing you want to hear. So you keep striding, hurrying your pace to keep the space between you two. But Vi's fast; she's closing the distance and wrapping a big hand around your arm.
The touch is enough to spike your annoyance a decent amount.
You rip your arm out of her grip, baring teeth as you grit out, "What?"
Vi raises both hands up to show she means no harm. Then she's stuffing them into her pockets, sighing before she says, "Look, I'm sorry."
That throws you through a loop.
"...What?" You ask again, only less hostile and more confused.
"I'm sorry," Vi repeats easily. "I...didn't mean to rile you up so much. It's just..." She struggles for a second. "It's like when you pull on a girl's pigtails because she's cute and annoying the fuck out of her makes her talk to you?"
That throws you through another loop.
You blink a few times, trying to compute what she just said before you go, "You're fucking with me."
Vi huffs a laugh. "No, I'm not."
"Yes, you are," you argue. "Because you can't be telling me that the reason you've been antagonising me is because you think I'm cute."
Vi shrugs, giving a lazy smile. "Yeah, that's exactly it."
You stare at her for a moment, a rush of emotions going through you. Then all you're feeling is a mixture of frustration and amusement.
"What are you? 8?" You retort, unable to think of anything else because so much has been given to you at once. The biggest being that Vi's just kind of admitted to having a crush on you and has been using preschool antics to catch your attention. Regardless of that attention being full-on rage which could have resulted in murder.
"Give me some credit," Vi replies, rolling her eyes. "I'm, at least, 10."
That draws a chuckle from you, soft and short, but a chuckle nonetheless. And Vi smiles wide because she's heard it, and she does have a nice smile, you notice.
There're many things you want to say, some of them not so kind while some more curious. But something warm flutters in your chest, giving life to a feeling that you haven't felt in a long, long time.
"...You're stupid," is that you finally settle on, and Vi laughs loudly at that. She closes the space between you two a little further, tentatively grinning.
"So I've been told," she replies before nodding towards the elevators. "So do you maybe wanna grab lunch with me or something?"
You hold Vi's gaze for a second, purse your lips before giving a small smile.
"No," you say, walking backward to maintain your gaze with Vi. "I'm busy."
"Tomorrow?"
"Nope."
"The next day?"
"Nah."
You and Vi are beaming at each other now, the space between you as wide as a chasm.
"What do I gotta do?" Vi asks, eager, and you laugh.
"Go a week without pissing me off, then you can take me out."
Vi's gaze turns determined, the look sending a slight shiver down your spine.
"Deal."
#vi x reader#vi x you#vi x y/n#arcane x reader#arcane x you#arcane#arcane league of legends#kismet writes â~#arcane fanfic
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ALL IN A DAY'S QUIRK : SERO HANTA x READER
summary:Â Sero gets hit with a quirk that makes others see him as the person they are most attracted to. Which you really wish you had known before you opened your mouth and gave him your usual, âHey, Sero!â tags/warnings:Â pro hero au, fluff, misunderstandings, quirk accident, not actually unrequited feelings, smut, thigh riding, fem reader (no pronouns but AFAB genitalia terms used), aged up characters, 5.3k
It was approximately four thirty-three p.m. when Sero Hanta returned from patrol and blew your peaceful day to bits.
Before his arrival, the Todoroki Agency had been relatively quiet, as it usually was around this time, everyone but the on-call staff winding down for the day. Youâd been hearing the telltale rustling of jackets and scuffle of feet in the office behind you since the clock ticked past four.
Not long after, a couple of your friends from the analytics department had wandered over to your desk, clearly deciding they were not going to get anything else done, gossiping and stealing the candies you kept in a glass bowl on the reception counter.
âI heard Shoutoâs manager is considering signing him up for a shirtless charity calendar,â Mari told you immediately, wiggling her eyebrows. âHana from brand management said she was asked to do research on the impact the calendar had on other prosâ careers, so I think this is serious.â
She looked beyond pleased, her cheeks pink and her ears tipped red, the way they always were when she contemplated her massive crush on your agency head, Todoroki Shouto.
You couldnât fault herâShouto was incredibly handsome and kind, if a bit spaceyâbut youâd always been drawn to a different pro hero on the agency roster. Someone just a little bit taller, with dark hair and a half-moon grin, a razor sharp sense of humor, and the most inconceivably mouth-watering thighs in the pro hero business.
Not that you had been giving them attention. Much.
You suppressed the urge to ask if anyone else from the agency was being considered for the calendar, wiggling your eyebrows back. âWell I know youâll be the first in line.â
Mariâs blush deepened, and Kimiko laughed around an orange-flavored candy, which you stocked for many reasons other than a certain tape-themed heroâs predilection for oranges, thank you very much.
âI just hope they include Uravity-san,â Kimiko said. âI meanânot shirtless shirtless, but like, god would I kill for her in a little sports bra.â
Kimiko sounded unaffected, but youâd literally hidden her beneath your desk the time pro heroes Uravity and Deku visited for an agency team-up with the Todoroki office. Sheâd spent the entire time peering out with big eyes, muttering under her breath, âI am so gay. So very very gay.â
You didnât doubt if Uravity were included in the spread, Kimiko might even beat Mari out for the first spot in line.
âYou both have such kind hearts,â you laughed. âSo eager to give to charity.â
âIâm a lifelong philanthropist,â Mari agreed, picking up your pen and doodling hearts all over your office stationery. You noticed she colored in only the left side, and suppressed another laugh.
Whatever. You knew what it was to be that whipped, even if youâd never do anything about it.
As huge as your thing was for Sero, there wasnât a chance in hell he returned your affections. He was incredibly friendly, but over the past few years, heâd never even given a hint that he was into you like that. Heâd treated you with the same easy cheer and subjected you to the same good-natured roasting he did everyone else in the agency.
And now was not the time to go looking for more, anyway. Youâd recently become close enough to see Sero outside of work and you were not about to endanger thatâyouâd been invited to a house party of his a couple months ago, gone to drinks with him and a couple of agency people after work, and even grabbed dinner alone a few times over the past few weeks. Youâd been texting memes practically nonstop this entire week alone.
He was so much fun, always quick with a joke, a wink, or an interesting story, and he wasnât afraid to tell things like they were. You forgot time was passing when you were with him, and sometimes when you went out, you stayed out long enough that you thought he might, too.
So you were finally reaching a stage in your friendship where Sero clearly felt close and comfortableâyou would not press for more.
It was just, sometimes, when he smiled down at you with that clever, mischievous grin, your heart felt like it was experiencing some sort of medical event. Sometimes, when he put his dark hair up into a messy half-bun, those biceps cording as he did so, it felt like someone had just vacuumed all the oxygen straight out of your lungs. Sometimes, when he leaned down to whisper something to you in his most conspiratorial tones, it felt like someone had spiked your brain into a blender and pureed it into mush.
But it was cool.
You knew how to play it cool.
Mari pulled you back to earth with the promise of more gossipâthis time, about her arch nemesis in accountingâand Kimiko leaned in, offering her own commentary over the unwrapping of another of your candies.
And then the clock struck four thirty-three, and Sero Hanta returned from patrol.
You heard the telltale mechanic ping of an agency badge passing checkpoint, and peeked around Kimiko to see Sero trudging through the doorway, looking strangely contemplative. He was covered in dirt and his uniform was slashed in several places, including a great deal of shredding about the thighs, which you would have been happier about if he didnât look so unusually subdued.
He didnât look hurt at any rate, so that was good. But you couldnât help but call out to him.
âHey Sero!â you said, curious about his demeanor. âHowâd patrol go? Something happen?â
Kimiko and Mari turned around, and you watched as both of them seemed to freeze up. Kimikoâs hand slapped against the reception counter, the sound echoing through the room, gripping tightly as though sheâd suddenly seen a ghost.
âUrâUravity-san,â she said, dipping into the most formal bow youâd ever seen her make. âWhatâs brought you here?â
You felt your mouth pull into a frown, staring at the back of her head in absolute bamboozlement. Was she seeing things? The only person in the doorway was Sero, and he was very much unaccompanied.
His helmet was propped between his hip and his elbow, so his face was clear tooâso Kimiko didnât even have the excuse of not being able to see his face, different though his costume was from Uravityâs.
Sero blinked, his mouth pulling into a semi-puzzled grin. âUravity?â
Mari was slapping Kimiko before you could inquire the same thing, hissing, âAre you losing it? Thatâs fucking Shouto.â She turned back to pin you with something between a glare and a concerned, assessing gaze, as if you too had lost your marbles.
You frowned back, your own concern deepening. âIâm sorryâare you guys seriously telling me that Shouto and Uravity are here with Sero?â You peered back around Mari at Sero, quirking a brow at him. âDid they get hit with some kind of invisibility quirk or are these two experiencing some kind of hallucination?â
Maybe too much shirtless calendar talk had gotten them too hot and bothered.
Seroâs dark gaze pinned you, and he quickly came tromping over, his boots echoing on the stone flooring. He leaned over the reception counter, pointing to his face with one long, pretty finger. âWait, you can tell itâs me?â
He smelled like cement and sweat and dust, and something vaguely minty, like heâd been chewing gum recently. You tried not to let your expression show how much you liked the look of him up close, those hooded dark eyes, his wide, charming mouth.
âUm, yes? I have eyeballs?â you wondered.
Sero blinked, leaning in closer. Your heartbeat ticked up. âYouâre sure?â
âShould I not beâŚsure?â you asked. âAre Shouto and Uravity really with you and Iâm the only one who canât see them?â
Sero shook his head, âNahâitâs just me.â
You frowned up at him, curious. âThen why are they calling you Shouto and UravityâŚ?â
Sero shook his dark head. His hair was pulled into that half-bun you loved, the way it usually was under his helmet on patrol, and all mussed from whatever run in heâd had. You tried not to think about what other activities might get his hair all mussed like that.
He smiled, something wide and conspiratorial. âGot hit with some kinda illusion quirk. People have stopped me like a thousand times on my way in to ask for All Mightâs autograph, or Hawksâ, and even Bakugouâs. Theyâre lucky it was just me, heâd have thrown a shit fit getting cut off in the street like that.â
Seroâs features shifted into something slightly more contemplative again. âBut youâre somehow immune, huh?â
You frowned. âShouldnât you get checked out at medical, then?â
His eyes softened, and another grin made its way onto his mouth. âYeah yeah, Iâll head right there.â
Kimiko and Mari were still gaping over at him like he was a miracle, and some strange feeling came over you, a concerned little squeeze of your heart. You grabbed Mari, plonking her down into your seat in your stead. âCover me for a couple minutes? Just say people are unavailable and take notes and Iâll figure it out when I get back. Iâm gonna run down to medical with Sero for a second.â
Mari nodded dumbly.
You pulled Seroâs helmet out of his grip, resting it in the crook of your own elbow, and gestured him down the hall with you. Sero fell into step beside you, keeping up easily with his long stride. He grinned down at you, seemingly unperturbed that heâd gotten hit with a quirk that had all but erased his identity in the eyes of others.
It was something you admired in him, his inherent good-naturedness.
You wondered why you were the only one who could tell it was him.
âAny good gossip while I was gone?â he asked, like he really couldnât be fussed about his predicament. âI was starting to hear shirtless calendar talk before I had to head out on patrol.â
You suppressed a flush and fought down the urge to ask if heâd been asked to be in it too.
You did not need to know.
âWhatever the hell is going on with you is the spiciest bit of gossip all day,â you told him, rounding a corner and badging into the stairwell down to the medical floor. You clung to the railing carefully and most definitely did not watch his thighs bunch as he took the stairs. âWant a drink after work? It seems like you could use one, after this.â
Sero smiled, an eyebrow raising. âTrying to get me drunk, huh?â
You wrinkled your nose. âAs if Iâd need to be so underhanded.â
You did. You did need to be so underhanded.
Sero had to angle himself carefully through the door, his shoulder pieces liable to snag on the doorway with the breadth of those pro hero shoulders. The medic on staff took one look at him and flushed, mumbling out a name you didnât know.
You piped in before she could say more. âCellophaneâs been hit with a quirk that makes him appear like someone else. Itâs not whoever you think!â
She blinked curiously, but then nodded, probably having seen much weirder things in her time as a hero agency staffer. She gestured Sero to a cot on the side of the room. âAlright, please sit down, Cellophane. Weâll do a couple quick tests and then get you sorted with the right quirk cancellation.â Her cheeks seemed to heat again as she spoke, but she made good on her promise, disappearing down the hall, calling to someone for quirk testing strips.
Sero hopped up on the cot, swinging those long legs, grinning at you from eye-level, now. âThink I should prank a couple people before they cancel it?â
You rolled your eyes. âOnly you would be having fun with this. No one in the world knows who you are!â
The corner of Seroâs mouth pulled wryly. âYou do.â
âYou donât know if that could change, dude. Better get it over with before you get stuck as like, Endeavor forever.â
Sero laughed, light and airy. âShouto wouldnât hang with me anymore.â
You nodded. âExactly, and none of the rest of us read the same weird manga you guys are into so youâd be all alone with no one to fanboy about it to.â
The medic returned with a thick silvery strip, pulling on blue nitrile gloves as she did so. Sero held his arm out obligingly, the lean muscle flexing in the fluorescence of the office lighting. She peeled off the backing of the strip, pressing it to Seroâs forearm, pushing it down firmly.
She attached a cable to some screened device, and you listened to the beep of various buttons. Sero watched you over her shoulder, his easy smile still in place.
Finally, the device in the medicâs hand beeped, and she pulled back, announcing somewhat shyly, âAn attraction-type quirk.â
You blinked, mystified. A what?
Seroâs grin seemed to freeze on his face, and his thin brows furrowed the tiniest bit.
The medic continued, oblivious. âThis quirk creates an illusion. External parties will perceive the affectee with the traits or as the person they are most attracted to.â
Seroâs dark eyes snapped to yours, widening, and you fumbled a step back, almost tripping over yourself. You threw out a hand, barely catching yourself on the counter.
No.
Oh fuck no.
If people were seeing who they were most attracted toâŚand you had just seen Sero the whole timeâŚ
That would meanâthat would meanâand he had heard you sayâ
âOh my god, I just remembered I have to get back to Mari,â you said, offering Sero a wave of your suddenly numb hand. âCanât, um, strand her at the desk for too long. Iâll leave you guys to it. Uh, yeah. Thanksâbye!â
You quickly threw yourself out through the door, leaving Sero alone with the medic. You dashed back up the stairwell, your heartbeat shooting into your mouth.
How could this be happening? How unbelievably embarrassing was that? Youâd worked so hard to play it cool in front of Sero for all this time, for years, really, and youâd finally just made it to a comfortable place as friends.
And thenâand thenâsome attraction-illusion quirk goes and blows your cover, just like that? For real?
And heâd heard you, too. Heard you say, âHey, Sero!â as soon as heâd come through the door, before anyone had revealed anything about who else they thought he might be instead. Before you could have possibly had any clue that heâd been quirked.
You could die of mortification.
You shooed Mari and Kimiko away from the desk when you got back, quickly readying your things to get the hell out of the office as soon as your night replacement arrived. You cleaned up all the bi-colored hearts Mari had doodled on every available surface of your desk and refilled the candy bowl Kimiko had apparently seen fit to devastate in your absence, your ears heating with the thought that Sero could catch on now, why you stocked orange candies.
God, could your replacement hurry the fuck up before Sero got back here?
But the night receptionist was predictably late, of course, and by the time you finally saw him badge through the front entrance you could hear quick, booted steps across the tile behind you.
Seroâs voice sounded over the back of your chair, just as a long-fingered hand closed around your wrist.
âY/N,â he said, his voice more careful than youâd ever heard it. âStill up for that drink? I think maybe we could talk over it.â
The night receptionist nodded at you and Sero as he made his way over, and you gave up your chair to him, collecting your bag with Seroâs warm fingers still clutching your wrist. You slowly worked up the courage to look up at him, face heating as you took in his uncharacteristically intent expression. His face had been cleaned and it looked like some antibiotic had been applied to some of the scrapes along his jaw.
You knew then youâd trapped yourself. Though it was probably also better to get things over with now than avoid the subject forever.
âOkay,â you said, trying to keep your voice normal. âYeah, letâs talk.â
Sero was the nicest dude ever, you had to remember that. Even when it came down to a rejection, he would still be completely kind and friendly. Probably not too much would change on his end afterwards either. You couldnât imagine him avoiding you or treating you any differently.
âMy place okay?â Sero asked as you shrugged on your bag.
You nodded, and he smiled, nearly as wide and silly as he normally did, tinged with only the slightest bit of shyness.
Youâd originally planned to take him out somewhere fun, but this conversation was probably best had in private. And Seroâs place was close, an apartment only a couple blocksâ walk, in a charming little neighborhood fringed by a park and a variety of interesting bars and cafes. Sero chatted away with his usual friendly ease as you walked, still in his shredded hero costume, waving to the couple people that recognized him as you did so.
Your stomach flipped as he opened his front door, gesturing you inside under his arm. He was tall and lanky enough that you fit easily, and you caught a whiff of that minty scent again under all the dust that coated his uniform. You tried not to look too closely at the lines of his bicep as you passed under it.
His apartment was just as youâd remembered it; spacious, casually decorated in neutral tones with splashes of interesting patterns spread across the rug, throw pillows, and his collection of wall hangings. It smelled cottony and clean, and Sero gestured you to his couch as he dumped his helmet and boots in the doorway, shrugging off his shoulder pieces.
âA beer cool?â he asked as he made his way into the kitchen. âIâve got a couple of good ones.â
âSounds great,â you told him, listening to the sounds of him cracking the caps.
To your surprise he plopped down on the couch next to you as he came back in, handing you a bottle. It was cold, and your fingers made little prints in the condensation where you touched it.
âSo,â he said, turning to you, a sly look in his dark eyes. âYou wanna talk about what just happened?â
Your face flamed, and you took a quick sip of your beer to give you time to recover yourself. It was sour on your tongue, a hint of orange peel in its profile.
âNo,â you told him honestly, giving him a self-conscious smile, which he returned. âI think itâs pretty clear, actually. You got hit by a quirk that shows people the person theyâre most attracted to and I, uh, obviously saw, um, you.â
Seroâs grin pulled wider at the edges, surprising you. If you didnât know better, you would think he liked hearing that. Although maybe it was a little bit of an ego stroke to hear you were someoneâs fantasy man, even if you didnât return their feelings.
âNot All Might and not Bakugou,â he said, something pleased in his tone.
You blinked at him, disturbed by those insinuations. âDefinitely not,â you sniffed. âI am a paragon of taste.â
Sero laughed, his fingers flexing on the side of his beer. Then he took a sip, seeming to contemplate something as he did, and you drew yourself together, preparing for the inevitable. That was definitely a look that said he was thinking hard, probably about the best way to let you down.
But then Sero grinned back down at you, leaning in collusively. âYou wanna know something?â
You could feel your brows raise curiously, even as your heartbeat picked up with his proximity. You looked down, then accidentally spied the strips of tanned thigh where his costume had torn, and had to quickly reroute your gaze for fear of staring. âThat depends.â
Seroâs grin went even more sly. âI think if youâd been hit with that quirk, Iâd have known it was you too.â
Your heartbeat slammed to a halt in your chest. It was only when Sero threw a hand out that you realized youâd lost your grip on your beer, his quick reflexes the only thing saving his carpet. You startled at the sudden move, making a weird arm-flinging motion somewhere between grabbing for your beer and grabbing onto him, ending up accidentally smacking him in the chest instead.
âFuck, Iâsorry!â you garbled out, stunned by his sudden proximity and the fistful of his costume youâd taken. His skin was warm against the side of your hand.
Sero blinked, looking taken aback for a moment. Then he shifted, and you heard the clink of two beers being deposited on his coffee table. You swallowed, unable to look away from him, and you watched his dark eyes rove over your face, before dipping down to stare at something just under your nose.
A shiver prickled up your spine.
âSo when youâwith the quirkââ you tried, but your brain had gone offline, and the right set of words were not coming to you. âUm, when you sayâyou would have knownâ?â
Seroâs grin crept back across his mouth. âI mean that Iâd have seen you, because Iâve been wanting to ask you out and trying to figure out if you're into me for months.â
It had to be the shock of this admission that registered you so stupid. âYouâmonths? Try years.â
Seroâs laugh beat back the instant wave of mortification that overcame you in the next second, when you realized what'd you'd just said. You could only smile back helplessly, equally pleased and embarrassed. He looked so good right then, too, grinning toothily, his hair a mess, his costume torn to shreds. He really was the most gorgeous guy you had ever seen, that quirk had totally had your number.
It suddenly dawned on you that you had little else to lose now, with everything out in the open. And when Sero looked like thatâsly, pleased, and a little bit of a messâyou thought you were done trying to bury things.
A thrill zinging down your spine, you leaned in and pressed your mouth to his.
Heâd been laughing, and you only caught the edge of his mouth, but Sero quickly corrected. You could feel his lips go slack in surprise for a second, and then he was schooling himself and returning your kiss with abandon.
Long fingers came up to take your chin, holding you firmly in place. It was so unexpectedly bold that you shuddered, kissing him harder. Your hand tangled further in the fabric of his costume, gripping onto him for dear life as his tongue met yours, twisting and teasing. It was so like him, the way he kissed. Teasing, playful, easy. Your head spun with how much you liked it.
âAw fuck, Iâve been wanting to do that for a while,â Sero said, when he finally pulled away far enough to enunciate the words. He shifted against you, putting a large palm against your back, pulling you to him. You followed his guidance, climbing into his lap, chasing his mouth again. You wanted moreâmore now that you thought you could have it.
âIâve been wantingâfor yearsââ you said, squeaking in surprise when Sero guided you down onto a strong thigh. It was hard and thick and way too muscular to be allowed, and your breath left you in a harsh hiss. And because this was the most embarrassing day of your life, Sero clocked it immediately, leaning forward in interest.
âYouâlike that? Myâthigh?â he asked curiously.
You could feel your face burning, like someone had just dunked it in a bucket of hot coals. âIâyes. I like everything about you. Including your thighs,â you admitted.
Seroâs hand guided you back down against him, pressing his knee up experimentally. A thrill sang through your veins at the feeling of a piece of him so warm and firm right up against your core. You barely bit back the noise you wanted to make.
âFuck, this is weirdly hot,â Sero said, leaning in to take your mouth again. You could feel him growing hard against your knee through the fabric of his costume, as his tongue flicked against yours, making your brain go a little woozy.
His arms came around you, holding your waist as he ground his leg up into you, sending a wave of pleasure striking through you like lightning. The moan youâd been trying to hold in finally broke free of you. âAhâHanta!â
The sound seem to spark something in him. Sero surged up, his hands making quick work of your shirt as he kissed you, still rocking you against his thigh in a way that made you see stars. You had the wild thought that everything about him was more than youâd ever imagined it would be, from the delicate press of his fingers to the warmth of his thigh to the way the strands of his hair that had escaped brushed across your forehead. Embarrassingly fast, like he knew exactly how to play you, he worked you up to the crest of your pleasure.
You had to put a hand to his chest to stop him.
âHanta, if youâIâm going to cum if we donât stopââ you said.
âOh my god please,â was his only answer, and he pulled you down onto his thigh with renewed vigor. Sparks of pleasure pricked all over your body as he kissed you again, his hands roaming every inch of exposed skin. He left bruising kisses down the side of your throat, fingers playing with your nipples.
Another few rocks into his thigh sent you right over the edge, and he held you against him as you rode it out, squirming against his thigh.
âThis is the hottest thing that has ever happened to me,â he said, something in his tone making it clear he was not done with you yet.
He helped you wiggle out of your pants, freeing himself of his own costume, and laid you out over his couch, grinning. He was golden with a fading summer tan, and his smile was so wide and charming and white against the dimming light from the windows. He was gloriously lean, hard with dense, compact stretches of muscle, every single inch of him honed from years of hero work. He was perfectâso stupidly, handsomely, perfect.
Between his thighs, his cock was just as long and lean, heavy and flush with arousal. It made you dizzy to think that this man, who youâd crushed on for so long, wanted you like thisâwanted you back in the same way youâd always wanted him. You motioned him closer, too eager now to be self-conscious about it.
Sero laughed, a happy noise. âFuck, youâre so pretty though.â He stretched out over you, sliding in between your thighs and guiding himself into you. His chest pressed to yours, hot and slick with a light sheen of sweat already, and you hissed with the feeling of him slipping inside you.
You felt drunk with arousal, crazy with want. You clutched him to you as he moved, thrusting carefully at first, as if testing the feeling of you, and then more firmly. You let out soft noises you hadn't meant to, which Sero seemed to appreciate.
âGod, look at you. Listen to you,â he said, grinning down at you, his dark eyes tracing over you. âI canât believe I got hit with that quirk. This is the luckiest day of my lifeâyouâre so cute. Soâfuckâso perfect.â
He slid into a frustratingly sedate pace, strokes long and languid, stretching out almost teasingly. You wrapped your legs more tightly around his hips, trying to press him into you, but his smile just widened. He moved leisurely, setting his own pace, just on the wrong side of too slow.
It drove you insane, somehow working you up even faster than if heâd been doing what you wanted. You muffled the sounds of your own moans against his lips, gripping onto those broad shoulders. Seroâs own fingers slid down to your clit, playing with you just as lightly and teasingly as his thrusts.
You could have killed him, but all you could do was hold onto him, slurring his name appreciatively.
He worked you like that for a while, bringing you close but never too close, drawing out the feeling into something warm and fizzy, like soda left in the sun. But eventually the band of his control seemed to snap, and he began thrusting into you harder, faster. Those long, lovely fingers circled your clit with more intent as he did, murmuring a steady stream of praise.
âPleaseâcum with me,â he panted into your mouth, as his fingers drew ever-tightening circles over you. âI want you to come with me, Y/N. Can youâcan you do that?â
You nodded frantically as his thrusts grew faster, sloppier. He was so good inside you, so good over you, his fingers such a delicious pressure against your clit. It only took a few thrusts more, a few strokes of those careful fingers, and then you were squirming against him in earnest, your veins going molten with pleasure.
âHantaâIâm going toâ!â
âYessss,â he hissed, and then he was orgasming too, spilling out his pleasure inside of you. His hips slapped yours in a stuttering pattern, half-crazed, and you shook against him, gasping. Your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest as you crested the wave, until finallyâfinally you went limp against him, just as his own body relaxed over you.
âI want to be hit with a quirk all the time,â he said, ridiculously.
You couldnât help but laugh, smiling into his shoulder. âDonât make a habit of it.â
Sero hummed thoughtfully. âI donât know. If this is what I get every time, thenâŚâ he trailed off, smirking down at you.
âIâm not going to bang you if youâre going to be irresponsible,â you told him.
He perked up, however, those dark eyes peering at you hopefully. âBut youâll bang me otherwise?â
You laughed again, pinching him lightly on the arm where you held him. âWhat do you think having a crush on you for years means?â
His grin went all sly and pleased again. âThen Iâll have to lock it down, of course. I havenât spent months wondering just to let you get away. Starting with dinner this evening, maybe. Do youâwould dinner be okay?â he asked. The sound of genuine, eager hope in his voice was so gratifying it made you want to kick your legs in the air.
You settled for nodding instead. âDinner sounds amazing.â
âThen Iâll arrange the finest takeout just for you,â he said, which you knew from experience meant the empanadas place around the corner. You laughed again, feeling full already with the promise of an easy meal, and a relationship to come.
âWhatever you want sounds good to me,â you said, even as he began to slide off of you, helping you up alongside him. âYouâve had a crazy day today, empanadas sound like the perfect cap.â
Sero leaned in, his expression as mischievous and charming as always. âItâs nothing,â he said, even as he carefully held out your shirt to you again, guiding you into it in an unexpectedly gentlemanly move. You let him stuff you into it, laughing, smiling into the kiss he gave you as you emerged.
He winked at you as he found his phone and dialed, smiling as you heard the call connect. âAfter all, I'm a hero," he said. "And itâs all in a dayâs work.â
#sero x you#sero x reader#sero x y/n#sero hanta x reader#hanta sero x reader#hanta sero x you#bnha x reader#sero smut
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I am begging you guys to vote for kamala harris like I am being so fucking serious. If Trump gets into office we are all fucked. He's going to nuke palestine, he's going to take away the department of education, he's going to remove environmental protections, getting rid of birth control, gay rights, the ability to VOTE, and its not just a possibility, hes going to DO it. He is going to ruin our lives if he wins the elections. I'm so fucking sorry but we have no choice. We HAVE to get kamala into office or everyone who isn't a rich white man is fucked. Please
edit: turning off reblogs cause you guys are annoying as shit. jesus fucking christ just block me dude its so simple. are you 5
(oh and also... the reason why you're so unaffected by whoever becomes president is usually because you're not the target for the laws being placed)
#donald trump#kamala harris#current events#i hate to be like this but i cant just stay quiet#made this post while incredibly scared for the future but i guess im just a chucklefuck huh
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someone who lets you break them twice - hockey!ex!rafe - part two
warnings: angst đĽ°
You shouldnât be here.
Itâs stupid. Dangerous, even.
Thatâs all you can think as you stand at the bar, fingers tapping nervously against your glass. Itâs packed, the typical crowd buzzing after another one of the games. Itâs the usual fans, players, and people whoâve never touched a hockey stick in their life but still come to bask in the afterglow of a win.Â
Youâd sworn after the last time â after that night â you wouldnât let yourself get sucked back into this. But here you are. Itâs only been three weeks since you accidentally ended up fucking him.
That night after his game, with your date somewhere outside, waiting for you, oblivious. You didnât mean for it to happen. It was supposed to be closure, a final goodbye, whatever excuse youâd fed yourself when you let Rafe pull you into that dark hallway at the stadium. Maybe it was seeing him on the ice again, that high, that intensity, had done something to you. The way heâd stared at you in the stands, like he was winning just to prove something. Like he still had something to prove to you.
Now, youâre actively avoiding him again â which is hard, considering heâs everywhere. On the screens, in the tabloids, in your goddamn head.
âYou okay?â your friend asks, snapping you out of your thoughts.
âYeah, just... crowded,â you lie, forcing a smile. But she knows better, giving you that knowing look that says, Yeah, sure, totally not about your hockey player ex who's right over there.
âUh-huh. Heâs here, isnât he?â She doesnât even have to ask. The answerâs written all over your face.
âI donât care,â you lie. âI justââ
But you donât finish because thatâs when you see him. You take a sip of your drink, scanning the room out of habit. And there he is.
Rafe Cameron, in all his post-game glory, laughing with his teammates like he doesnât have a care in the world. Heâs still wearing part of his team gear like itâs his uniform for life, that stupidly tight team jacket stretched across those broad shoulders you used to run your hands down. His hair is still damp from the shower. He hasnât seen you yet â thank God â but you know itâs only a matter of time.
He always finds you.
You suck in a sharp breath and look away fast, pretending to be deeply invested in whatever drink the bartender is making.
Why did you come here again? To prove a point to yourself? To what, show him youâre unaffected? Stupid. So, so stupid. Heâs a mistake. A mistake wrapped up in six feet of cocky charm.
Your friendâs watching you, probably already figuring out whatâs going through your head, but youâre too focused on him. On the way he throws his head back laughing at something his buddy says. You canât hear it over the music, but you know that laugh too well, you can imagine the sound like clockwork. You should be past this. Youâve had closure. The kind of closure that leaves bruises and bite marks, the kind that shouldnât have happened.
âGirl, you need toââ
âShut up,â you mutter, but thereâs no heat behind it. You know what sheâs going to say. You know exactly what sheâs thinking because itâs the same thing running through your head:Â Why the fuck canât you stay away from him?
âNope,â she says firmly, like sheâs reading your mind. âNot tonight, okay? You said you were done.â
âI am done,â you murmur. Liar, liar, liar.
Itâs downright infuriating how your body reacts to him, even now.
You can feel it in your chest,  something that always pulls you toward him and hasnât let up since the day you first met him. Itâs maddening. Youâll ignore him, just like last time â except, okay, last time didnât exactly work out. But this time will be different. Youâll stay cool, stay calm, stayâ
âLeaving already?â
You freeze, your heart skipping for all the wrong reasons. You could walk away, pretend you didnât hear him. But you donât.
You slowly turn around, and there he is, standing right behind you, eyes on you with that same intensity that always makes it impossible to breathe.
He looks good. Too good. And he knows it.
âWhat do you want?â
He smirks, leaning against the bar like this is just another normal conversation. Like you didnât fuck him three weeks ago after months of silence. Like that didnât mean something.
âCanât say hi to my ex?â He cocks his head, a flicker of amusement in his eyes. âOr are we pretending that didnât happen now?â
You roll your eyes, taking another sip of your drink, trying to appear unbothered. But your body hates you. He steps closer, just enough that you catch the scent of his cologne â that stupid scent that still haunts your bed.
âIâm not pretending anything,â you snap, meeting his gaze. âI have nothing to say to you.â
 âYou were gonna pretend you didnât see me?â
âIâm not doing this with you,â you mutter, turning to leave. But before you can, he grabs your wrist â not hard, but enough to make you pause.Â
âTell me Iâm wrong,â he says, his voice lower now, more serious. His eyes bore into yours, searching for something. âTell me you didnât come here hoping to see me.â
He knows. He fucking knows. Heâs still got you wrapped around his finger, and heâs not even hiding it.
You jerk your hand out of his grip, your jaw clenched tight. âYou think I came here for you?â You can feel your pulse racing, the anger inside, because, fuck, maybe thereâs a part of you that did. âYou think I came here to throw it all away for you?â
He doesnât even flinch. In fact, he steps closer, heâs huge and takes up too much space. âMaybe you just wanted to see me.â
You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. âI have seen you, Rafe. You look like shit.â You take a step back, needing space, needing air. âNot everythingâs about you.â
He chooses to ignore your little comment.
âCouldâve fooled me. Youâre still thinking about it, arenât you?â
You know exactly what heâs talking about, and your body betrays you with a flush that spreads up your neck. That night. The way his hands had felt on your skin, the way you hadnât been able to get enough of him.
âIt was the adrenaline,â you snap, refusing to let him get the upper hand. âThatâs all it was.â
âThatâs bullshit,â he fires back immediately, stepping closer again, eyes locked on yours. âYou werenât thinking about the game when you kissed me. Or when you begged me toââ
âShut up,â you hiss, cutting him off, your cheeks burning with rage. âWe both know what happened was a mistake.â
Even as the words leave your mouth, you know how fake they sound. The memory of that night â his body over yours, his hands on you, the heat between youâ
âMistake, huh?â Rafe tilts his head, eyes narrowing as if heâs daring you to say it again. âThat why you couldnât keep your hands off me?â
You want to kill him.
âWe were both high off the win. I wasnât thinking. It didnât mean anything.â
His jaw tightens, and you can see youâre hurting him. He leans down, close enough that his lips almost brush against your ear, and you shiver despite yourself.
âYou werenât thinking when you came apart in my arms, huh? You werenât thinking when you told me you needed me,â he says, his voice a low rasp that makes you clench your thighs.Â
âStop.â Your voice cracks, and you hate yourself for it. You feel like youâre losing control, like youâre getting sucked back into him, the one you swore youâd broken free of.
âYouâre still thinking about it. I know you are,â Rafe murmurs, and his hand slides up your arm, fingers grazing your bare skin.
You swallow hard, pulling back slightly, needing space to think, to breathe. âYouâre not as important as you think.â
He chuckles softly, but thereâs no humor in it. âMaybe not. But Iâm still in your head. You still want me.â
You want to scream, want to shove him, want to do something to make him shut the fuck up because the worst part is, heâs not wrong. Youâre still here, youâre still drawn to him like a magnet, no matter how many times youâve told yourself youâre done.
And you hate him for it. Hate him.
âI donât want you,â you say, but the words come out too weak, like you donât believe them yourself, and Rafeâs eyes glimmer with amusement like he knows you donât.
âThat so?â he murmurs, stepping even closer, crowding you, his presence taking over your personal space in the best and worst way. His hand trails down your arm again, âThen why are you shaking?â
âIâm notââ you start, but before you can finish, his mouth is down on yours.
You donât even think. You donât have time to. One second, youâre angry, and the next, youâre kissing him back like you need him to breathe. Your hands fly to his chest, gripping the fabric of his jacket as you pull him closer. So fucking stupid.
You hate him, but you need him.
His tongue brushes against yours, and you moan into his mouth, hating yourself for how good it feels. Before you know it, heâs already pulling back, tugging you toward the back of the bar, weaving through his teammates with no hesitation, dragging you like you weight nothing.
âRafe,â you hiss, trying to pull back, but heâs not listening. He doesnât have to, he knows youâll follow.
âWhat the fuck are you doing?â you snap, but your voice cracks. Because you know exactly what heâs doing. Youâve been here before. And despite every warning bell going off in your head, your bodyâs already reacting, already wanting this.
He doesnât say a word at first, just spins you around and pins you against the door, his body pressing against yours, so close you can feel the hard lines of his muscles, the heat radiating off him. You open your mouth to argue, to push him away, to remind yourself why this is a bad idea â but then his lips are on yours again, and everything falls apart.
Rafeâs breath is hot against your neck, hands gripping your waist like every inch of space between you is unbearable. Youâve barely had time to catch your breath from him pinning you against the wall, his lips crashing into yours like heâs drowning in the kiss, like youâre still his to touch, to hold, to ruin.
And God, it feels like you are.Â
Even though every part of you knows this is a bad idea, knows you should have walked away the second you saw him, your body doesnât give a damn. It wants him. Itâs always wanted him. Youâre making out like youâre about to fuck right here in this tiny, dingy hallway, and thereâs no stopping it now.
He yanks your shirt higher, his fingers trailing over your skin in a way that makes you want to forget all the bullshit that came before this. His mouth is on your collarbone now, kissing down, down, like heâs memorizing the way your body reacts to him.Â
âI miss you,â he murmurs.
And itâs like all the airâs been sucked out of your lungs.
You swallow hard, shaking your head, refusing to let yourself believe it. âDonâtâ Donât say that.â
âItâs the truth,â he says, his gaze locked on yours. âI miss you, okay? Iâfuck, I hate this. Hate that youâre not there anymore, that youâreââ He breaks off, sucking in a sharp breath, like heâs struggling to find the words. âThat youâre gone. Like Iâm nothing to you.â
Just as heâs about to move lower, the door flies open. The sound scares you both, and Rafe steps back, his hands falling away from you instantly, leaving you cold, exposed, and pissed.
âShitââ Rafe mutters, straightening up, turning around to face the door. And there she is.
Her.
Sofia, the teamâs physical therapist â and the woman whoâs been at the center of all your doubts, all your insecurities, since she was hired a year ago. The reason you and Rafe broke up in the first place. Sheâs standing in the doorway, eyes flicking between the two of you. But it doesnât matter. The sight of her makes your blood boil.
You freeze, your body going rigid with the shock of it. You canât believe this.Â
Now? Of all times?
Sofiaâs eyes move to Rafe, and itâs like youâre not even there. Like this isnât the most awkward, tension-filled moment of your fucking life.
âRafe,â she says calmly, too casually, like she hasnât just interrupted whatever this is. âCoach needs you. Itâs important.â
Rafe tenses, and for a second, he looks torn. But only for a second.
You can feel your chest tightening, your hands curling into fists at your sides. Itâs always been like this. The way he looks at her, the way he drops everything for her, how they have this whole connection you were never part of. And it hits you again â she knew things about him you didnât. Important things. Things that shouldâve been yours to know first.
You remember the night you found out about the other teamâs offer â how blindsided youâd felt when you saw it on the news. It wasnât even that he rejected the offer. It was the fact that he didnât tell you. Didnât think it was a big deal. But he told her. You feel like throwing up by just thinking about it. The humiliation, the way Sofia had acted like it was normal, like she was so fucking in the loop.Â
And now sheâs here, again, like she always is.
You push past Rafe, your voice cutting through the tension. âYouâve got to be fucking kidding me.â
Rafe turns to you, âItâs not what you think.â
You scoff, eyes burning into his. âNot what I think?â You can feel the fury bubbling up, your chest tightening with every breath. âDo you think Iâm fucking stupid, Rafe?â You look between him and Sofia, your stomach churning at how casual she looks. Like sheâs used to this. Used to being thereâin the middle of things she has no business being in.
Sheâs standing there all cool and collected, glances between the two of you like this is just another day at work, another harmless interruption. She even has the nerve to offer you a tight, professional smile. Like sheâs the fucking victim. Like she hasnât been the fucking problem all along.
âShould I go?â she asks, voice sweet and calm, like sheâs offering to leave a fucking brunch.
That does it. You snap. The adrenaline from the fight, from being caught, from everything just crashes through you like a wave. You glare at her, feeling your pulse race with rage.
"Are you fucking serious?" you spit, stepping forward, your voice shaking with barely contained rage. âShould you go? You shouldnât be here. Ever. Youâre not wanted.â Every word drips with venom, and the look on Sofiaâs face changes slightly. She knows sheâs hit a nerve.
She always does.
Rafe reaches out like heâs going to grab your arm, to stop you from escalating, but you pull back hard. You canât even look at him right now.
âDonât fucking touch me.â
You canât believe this is happening. Again.
Rafeâs face falls, like he didnât expect you to react this way, like he hasnât been a complete idiot for months. You step back, creating as much space as you can between you, him, and her.
âWow,â You laugh bitterly, the sound hollow even to your own ears. âThis is why weâre here. This right here. You, herââ You wave your hand dismissively at Sofia, who still stands there, too composed for what this moment is. âYouâre so fucking blind.â
He looks like he wants to say something, to defend himself, but no words come out. Good.
Youâre tired of hearing his excuses anyway.
âI donât get why you couldnât just talk to me,â you continue, feeling the familiar burn of tears threatening to sting your eyes. But you wonât give either of them the satisfaction of seeing you cry. Not now. âBut no, you had to go to her. Sheâs your go-to, right? You tell her everything. She makes you feel better, right?â
âI didnât mean for it to happen like that,â he finally mutters, his voice low, strained. âI rejected the offer. It wasnât a big deal.â
âNot a big deal?â You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. âOf course, it was a big deal, Rafe. I was supposed to be the last to know? You think just because you rejected it, it didnât fucking matter?â
Sofia clears her throat, shifting her weight uncomfortably, but you ignore her, your eyes still locked on Rafe. You canât believe how casual heâs being about all of this, like your feelings were an afterthought. Like you were an afterthought.
âAnd youââ You turn to Sofia now, your voice laced with venom. âYou knew the entire time. You both did.â
Sofia opens her mouth, but Rafe cuts her off. âStop,â he says, his voice sharp. âJust... stop.â
âNo, you donât get to do that,â you snap, stepping back, keeping the distance between you. âYou donât get to look at me like that. Like Iâm the one being unreasonable. I loved you, Rafe. I trusted you. And you broke that. You broke me.â
This is between you and Rafe, and sheâs just a reminder of everything that went wrong, of all the things he kept from you.
With a bitter laugh, you grab your jacket from the floot and push past them both, your heart pounding in your chest. âI hope youâre happy together,â you mutter, not looking back as you storm out of the bathroom, out of the bar, out of his life.
You storm out of the bar, your pulse ripping in your ears, heart slamming against your chest like itâs trying to break free from whatever this is. The cool night air hits your skin, but it does nothing to calm the heat in your body. You can still feel his hands on you, his mouth, the way he pulled you in like nothing had changed, like it was still him and you against the world. But nothing is the same anymore. He isnât yours to touch, and youâre not his to ruin. You canât keep doing this to yourself, letting him in just to tear you apart all over again.
Your phone buzzes in your pocket, and you pull it out, staring at the screen. Itâs a text from your friend, asking if youâre okay. You blink, forcing yourself to take a breath. Right. Yeah. Iâm fine. Just needed some air. Iâll be back in a sec. Lie after lie after lie.
Youâre done. For real this time. Youâve said it before, told yourself that you were finished with Rafe, but it never stuck. This time though? You donât think you could go back even if you wanted to.
Youâre tired. Tired of fighting, tired of waiting for him to figure his shit out, tired of being second to someone else. Sofiaâs just a reminder of all the ways heâs failed you, of the times he left you hanging in the worst way. But itâs not just her â itâs him. Itâs always been him and the way he never truly opened up to you. Not the way you needed him to.
Your chest hurts so fucking bad as the tears finally start to blur your vision, but you donât stop walking. You donât look back. Not this time. You donât make it more than a few steps before you hear it â his voice, calling your name. Loud, desperate.
You curse under your breath, not daring to turn around, but heâs quick. His footsteps are fast, catching up to you before you can get too far.
âWait!â Rafeâs hand grabs your arm, pulling you to a stop.
You spin around, ripping your arm from his grip, âDonât you fucking dare. Let me go, Rafe.â
He doesnât. His eyes are frantic, like he knows he already lost but isnât willing to admit it. âNo, weâre not doing this again. You donât just get to walk away like that.â
âLike what?â You scoff, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand. âLike Iâm tired of the same bullshit with you? Like Iâm finally done playing this game?â
âYou donât mean that.â Thereâs something rin the way heâs looking at you, something that makes you almost hate him more. Because heâs right â you donât mean it. Not fully. And thatâs the worst part.
âDonât tell me what I mean, Rafe,â you spit, shoving his chest. He barely moves. âStop,â you snap, pushing him again. âJust stop. You canât keep doing this, showing up, pulling me back in, pretending like you care when itâs convenient for you.â
âI do care.â He runs his hands through his hair, exasperated, âWhy do you think Iâm here right now?â
âBecause you hate not being in control,â you spit back, chest heaving. âBecause you hate it when things arenât on your terms.â
âThatâs not it,â he growls, stepping closer again. Heâs towering over you now, but you donât back down. âYou think I donât fucking hate this too? You think this is easy for me? Iâm trying, alright. I fucked up, but Iâm trying.â
You laugh, but thereâs no humor in it. âTrying? Trying is telling me the truth. Trying is not keeping me in the dark while you run off to herââ
He cuts you off, stepping even closer, until you can smell the familiar scent of his cologne again, âYou brought a fucking date to my game!â
âAfter we broke up,â You hiss, shoving a hand against his shoulder, âGod fucking knows what you did with her while we were together.â
Rafe  grabs your wrist, pulling you back toward him. "Nothing happened with her," he snaps, his grip tightening for a second before he lets go, as if realizing heâs too close. "I never touched her."
You pull away, anger boiling over. "Does it even matter? You kept her close, closer than you kept me. You told her things! About us, like sheâs some fucking therapist.âÂ
He reaches for you again, his hand hovering near your arm before he drops it. "I never meant for you to find out like that. I swear, I was trying to figure it all outâ"
"Figure it out?!" You laugh, but itâs broken. "Rafe, you made me feel like I didnât matter. Like I was some... some extra piece in your life. But with her? You told her everything. What was I to you?"
He shakes his head, frustration evident. "You were everything! You are everything. But I didnât want to put you through it. All the shit with the team, with the offerâ"
"Thatâs not your decision to make!" you shout, the words tearing through you. "You donât get to choose whatâs hard for me, what I can handle. I couldâve been there for you. We couldâve done it together, but you shut me out. And now you expect me to justâwhat? Let it go because you say you didnât mean it?"
He stares at you, his chest heaving, his jaw clenched. You can see the conflict in his eyes, the same old battle heâs always foughtâwanting you but not knowing how to let you in. His hands curl into fists at his sides, and for a moment, it looks like he might say somethingâsomething real.Â
"Why didnât you tell me how you felt?" he asks quietly, his voice almost pleading. "If you were hurting this much, why didnât youâ"
"Why didnât I?!" You cut him off, tears brimming in your eyes now. "Because you didnât give me a chance, Rafe! You made it clear you didnât need me like that. I thought maybe if I just held on a little longer, you'd let me in. You chose her, Rafe. You always choose her.â
âI didnât choose her,â he says through gritted teeth, and thereâs something desperate in his tone. âIâm standing right here. You think I like seeing you like this?â
âThen why do you keep doing it? Why canât you just let me go?â
âI canât,â he says, his voice strained, like the words are being ripped out of him. He grabs your hand, softer this time, âBecause Iâm still in love with you. Iâve never stopped.â
You remember all the half-truths, all the nights you waited for him to choose you.
You shake your head, âYou only love me when itâs convenient. When you need me.â
âI told her things because I didnât want to hurt you,â Rafe snaps, âI thought I was protecting you, keeping shit from getting messy.â
You laugh bitterly, shaking your head in disbelief. âProtecting me? You let her in, told her things you shouldâve told me. You think thatâs protecting me?â
His face contorts with something like regret, but youâre not sure if itâs enough to change anything. His chest is heaving, eyes wide and wild.
But then he just blurts out, âYou kissed Elijah.â
You freeze.
Of all the things he couldâve said.
âYou think thatâs why weâre here right now?â
He doesnât answer, just stares at you like youâve ripped something out of him. Like you kissing someone else, even for a second kills him.
âYou were already gone. We werenât together.â
He flinches, âSo, what? You kissed him to get back at me?â
âWhat the hell does Elijah have to do with any of this. You know what? Yes, I did. Because you didnât even fight for us.â
âI didnât fight for us?â he growls. âYou broke up with me without even giving me a chance to explain. You didnât even let me try to fix it. You just walked away.â
You ended things so quickly, so coldly, because you couldnât handle the idea of fighting for someone who wasnât fighting back. You didnât even give him the chance to explain.Â
âYou think I didnât want to fight for you?â His voice cracks, and for the first time, you see real pain behind his eyes. âI was trying to keep my shit together, trying to balance everything, and I fucked up, okay? But I never wanted to lose you.â
âDonât fuckingâ â
âI watched you kiss him. I couldnât fucking look away.â He interrupts it physically hurts him to admit it. âI was right there, front and center, like an idiot. And I still needed you after that. Do you know what that felt like? Watching you with him, like I didnât even exist anymore?â He swallows, his jaw working overtime as he tries to hold it together, but you can see the cracks forming. âIt was like everything that I didnât say, everything I was too fucking scared to admit... it didnât even matter. You just moved on.â
âElijah doesnât matter, okay? He never mattered. But youââ You pause, the words dying in your throat, because you donât want to say it, donât want to give him the satisfaction of knowing how deep heâs cut you. But you say it anyway. âYouâre the one who made me feel like I didnât matter. You donât get it, do you?â Your voice is hoarse, worn from fighting, from trying to make him understand something heâs never been willing to face. âThis isnât about Elijah or Sofia or any of that. Itâs about you. Itâs about how you make me feel like Iâm always one step behind, always waiting for you to choose me when I shouldnât have to beg for it.â
His eyes well up, and for the first time, you see it â those emotions heâs kept locked away for so long. His lips tremble as he tries to say something, but the words get stuck, like heâs choking on everything heâs never been able to say before.
âI know,â he finally whispers, voice breaking. âI know itâs my fault.â His hands fall to his sides, defeated, and the tears spill over. âI didnât want to hurt you. I didnât want you to see me like this⌠weak.â
Your chest tightens as you watch him, his face crumpling in a way youâve never seen. This man who was always so put together, so guarded, unraveling right in front of you. You never thought you'd see him cry â not like this. Not in front of you.Â
He takes a shaky breath, his voice barely a whisper now. âYou were always so strong. So⌠so good. And I was terrified, okay? Terrified that if I let you see the real me, the part of me thatâs so fucked up, youâd leave. That youâd realize Iâm not enough. Not for you.â
His words hit you like a punch in the gut, and suddenly youâre not as angry as you thought youâd be. Youâre just... tired.
âRafeâŚâ you whisper, but the words stick in your throat, caught between wanting to comfort him and wanting to protect yourself.
âI know I fucked up,â he continues, his voice breaking with every word. âI pushed you away because I didnât know how to be what you needed. I didnât know how to let you in. And now youâre gone, and itâs my fault.â He wipes at his face, but the tears keep coming, his chest heaving with the weight of it all. âBut I love you. I love you more than Iâve ever loved anyone, and Iâm begging you for one more chance. Please.â
You donât know what to say. Youâve dreamed about this moment â him finally opening up, letting you see him. But now that itâs happening, it doesnât feel the way you thought it would. You donât feel victorious or relieved. You just feel... sad.
You want to believe that heâs changed, that this time will be different. But then you remember all the nights you spent alone, waiting for him to come home.
âI donât know if I can do this again,â you whisper, your voice trembling. âI donât know if I can go through this with you, only to end up back here. Hurt. Broken.â
âIâll change,â he says desperately, stepping closer to you, his hands reaching out but stopping just short of touching you. âIâll do whatever it takes. I canât lose you, not like this. Please.â His voice cracks again, and for the first time, you see it â the fear in his eyes. Heâs terrified. Terrified of losing you for good.Â
But youâre terrified too. Youâre scared of giving him your heart again, only for him to break it.
âYou donât get it. I canât keep waiting for you to figure your shit out while Iâm left in pieces. I deserve more than that. I deserve someone who isnât afraid to love me the way I deserve.â
His face crumples again, and he swallows hard, trying to hold back the sobs threatening to break free. âYou do,â he whispers. âYou do deserve that. And I swear, Iâll be that for you. Iâll be better. Let me fix it,â he pleads, âPlease.â
âFix what?â you shake your head, âThis isnât something you can patch up with pretty words or promises. I donât trust you. Do you get that? I donât trust us. You say you love me, but love isnât supposed to feel like this. Itâs not supposed to make me feel like Iâm breaking every time I look at you.â
His shoulders slump, and for a second, he looks almost boyish, like a child whoâs just realized heâs ruined his favorite toy. âYouâre everything to me. I thought I was protecting you, but I see now that I was just... I was just pushing you away. Let me try.â
You close your eyes, the tears finally slipping down your cheeks as you shake your head. âI donât know if you can.â
âPlease,â he whispers again, âDonât leave me. I-I canât do this without you.â
You donât know who you are without him either. Heâs been such a part of you, woven into your heart in ways that canât just be undone. Your heart breaks all over again, because youâve wanted to hear those words for so long â needed him to need you the way you needed him. But now? You already left.
You wipe at your face with the back of your hand, trying to calm yourself. You canât fall apart now, not when youâre finally seeing things clearly.
âIâm not leaving because I donât love you,â you say softly, each word feeling like a knife to your chest. âIâm leaving because I do. But I canât keep waiting for you to be the person I need. I canât keep putting myself through this. You had so many chances to let me in, and every time, you chose to shut me out.â
Rafe looks like heâs about to argue, but then his face crumples, his shoulders slumping forward as he covers his face with his hands. Heâs breaking, right in front of you, and it takes every ounce of strength you have not to fall apart with him. He looks at you like youâve just ripped his heart out of his chest.Â
âGod, Iâm sorry,â he sobs, his voice muffled behind his hands. âIâm so fucking sorry.â
You swallow hard, your throat tightening as the tears keep coming. Youâve heard his apologies before â after every argument, every time he made you feel small and insignificant, heâd say he was sorry. But those words have lost their meaning.
âI know,â you whisper. âI know youâre sorry. But weâre not good for each other right now.â
âI love you,â he whispers, âI love you so fucking much.â
You bite your lip, tasting the salt of your own tears as you choke back a sob. âI know. And I love you too.Â
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe fic#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron fluff#rafe x reader#hockey!rafe#ex!rafe#toxic!rafe#rafe x female!mc#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe imagine#rafe cameron imagines#rafe cameron imagine#rafe angst#rafe cameron angst#rafe x y/n#rafe obx#obx rafe cameron#requested#rafe outer banks#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe cameron one shot#rafe cameron obx#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#angst
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Every time I think I am free of the hybrid brain rot he pulls me in again đ
Warnings: fem!reader, dog hybrid!gyu, cat hybrid!reader mean dom!reader, desperate horny gyu, ?unrequited love, dry humping, somnophilia, handjob, cumming in pants
Kitty!you (ofc) lives with rambunctious but very fluffy big dog hybrid gyu who you try to avoid most of the time because he just doesnât seem to get how big he is, still thinking he is a lapdog and ends up smothering you everytime he tries to cuddle or groom you. He is always hurt when you reject him and his trembling wet eyes give you pause but not enough to let him come near you
Until your poor owner runs into financial trouble and can't afford to keep the heating on as much as usual and you find yourself regularly getting too cold to sleep. Beomgyu seems mostly unaffected. In fact he seems to like the cold, his large normally overheated body welcoming the change as usually your owner will have the heat cranked up very high just for your sake, leaving poor gyu forced to splay out on the floor, limbs spread in all directions and touching the cool ceramic floor (the only cool surface in the house) with his tongue lolling out as he pants the heat away
You always turned up your nose at him, feeling like it's inappropriate for him to lay out like that, shirtless and with his privates barely covered by his thin shorts but when you had complained to your owner, they sweetly but firmly reminded you that he's only like that because the heat has been turned up for you and that if you want to keep your eyes from being assaulted by the sight, you can always put the heat down.
Of course you didn't. Instead you scoffed and muttered something mean about the digusting view, hurting the big pup even more but you didn't care.
Well now the tables have turned, and you're left freezing even under all your blankets while he is happily sleeping in his bed with just a thin sheet covering him up. Bastard. You can practically feel the heat radiating off him and you yearn for it so badly you might actually make yourself suffer through the inconvenience of being near him just to get to it
You try to hold off as much as you can but between your shattering teeth and numb hands and feet, you can't help yourself. You stalk towards his bed with your blankets, not bothering to ask his permission before you curl up into his side and cover your bodies with the blankets.
"Huh?" Beomgyu wakes up confused, a bit of drool seeping at the corner of his mouth from deep sleep. Ugh.
"I'm cold. You're warm." Is all the explanation you give him and beomgyu does not ask for more. He doesn't want to mess this up, just happy you're finally accepting his touch even if begrudgingly.
You groan as he wraps his arms around you and pulls you tighter against him, burying his face in your neck to take a big whiff before letting out a satisfied sigh.
"It's okay. I'll keep you warm, kitty." You ignore the way his deep, husky voice right against your ear and the way his large hands wrapped around your frame makes you feel. This all doesn't mean anything. You're just cold and he is basically a free heater.
You try to ignore the noises he makes in his sleep--his little whimpers, his garbled moans, even the little urgent whispers of what sounds an awful lot like your name.
You ignore the feeling of something hard pressing against you at night, you even ignore the sometimes small, sometimes harsh rocking motions of his hips against you as he cried and whines about something in his dreams, pathetic voice calling out for someone to "please, please, i'll be good"
You ignore the way that makes your body tingle and your underwear get sticky. This is all just to keep warm.
But what you can't ignore is the startled way he wakes up almost every night and rushes to the toilet, spending 15 to 30 minutes at a time in there and leaving you to freeze again. No, this simply won't do. This defeats the whole purpose of your new sleeping arrangement. What good is it to get all warmed up in his embrace, wrapped in his large arms, feeling his heated breath panted against your neck, if he will rip it away from you and leave you for the cruel elements to ravage and reclaim your body in the middle of the night?
So when he starts crying in his sleep again and his hips begin to rut against you, you move your hand between your bodies to take a hold of his hard member that has been poking you for countless nights.
It takes a few seconds of coaxing before he realizes what's going on, a few seconds of his moans almost reaching a fever pitch at the sudden unexpected stimulation, before he wakes up with a gasp, his already big eyes massive with shock at finding you with your hand down his pants and jerking him off.
"Kitty, w-what--" you cut off his slurring words with a twist of your wrist that leaves him keening.
"You think you're so slick? You think I can't feel you humping my ass every night? You think I don't know that you run to the bathroom to jerk this stupid cock off so i don't wake up covered in your dirty cum?"
"I'm sorry. Can't help it. You smell so good." He cries out pathetically, his hips moving to meet your tight fist as you jerk him off. "Please don't be mad at me. Please don't stop sleeping with me. I can be good, I promise. I'll do better. I think I'm going into heat. I'll tell master to take me to a heat center so I can get it out of my system and be a good dog again. I promise I am not a perv. I know this is bad. I know I shouldn't do this. I'm sorry--"
"God, do you ever shut the fuck up." You growl, bringing his face to your and kissing him roughly, and despite all his emphatic proclamations, he immediately opens his mouth and lets you push your tongue in, moaning and sucking on it like the perv he claims he is not. He chases after your lips over and over again, all while his hips never stop fucking your fist, until you push his face away to catch your breath, strings of saliva joining you wet lips.
"You wanna go to heat center and fuck a pretty little bitch? You think any bitch would let a sick mutt like you who lusts after kitties near any of their holes? That's disgusting." You don't know why youâre so mean to him but you know that the thought of him breeding a random bitch at a pay to fuck facility makes your blood boil.
"I'm sorry. I know I'm bad. Just don't want you to be mad at me." He cries, real tears dripping down his long lashes. "I'll do whatever you want. I'll use my heat toys every night before we sleep so I can get it out of my system and be good for you. Would that be better? Please?"
"No need." You tell him, acting nonchalant but burning inside at his desperate need to please you, thriving off of it. Fuck this is so wrong but it feels so good and you can't stop. "I'll deal with your problem myself. You can't help it that you're a sick little mutt. I'll take care of you but you have to keep this between us. Master can't know or he'll take me away from you to protect me."
He whimpers at the last part and shakes his head, fucking desperately into your hand as if it will be taken away any second. "I won't. Just between us. I'm not a bad dog, not dangerous, just... just..."
He trails off in a whine, looking at you in frustration, his eyes trying to convey something to you that you're not sure you want to know so you pretend you don't see it.
"Just needy. Right?" You tell him sharply and he gasps, nodding, his fluffy puppy ears pressed down to his skull anxiously. "Yes. So needy."
"I know. Let me take care of you. Let go for kitty. I know you want to. I can feel you drenching my hand like a bitch in heat." You chuckle, rubbing your thumb quickly over his leaking head, making his breathing pause and shudder. "Well, i suppose you are. So come on, cum for me, my little bitch. But keep it down, we can't let master see you like this."
"Yes. Yes, pretty. Anything for you." He whines, and you ignore most of it, just focusing on the way he bites down on his lip so hard it breaks the skin just so he can keep his slutty cries at bay as he cums, shooting long ropes of warm cum into your hand and his pants, soaking both in his release that goes on and on until all that is left of his is a slumped, sweaty, drooling mess in your arms.
"Fuck, what a mess." You scrunch your nose, bringing you hand up to show him just some of his milky cum covering your hand.
"I'm sorry." He slurs, barely conscious. "I'll clean up."
He tries to get up but you hold him down firmly. You're not going to let go of your free heater after all you've just done to stay warm.
"Just clean up in the morning." You tell him, wiping your dirty hand on his pants.
"But I'm all sticky and gross."
"Good. I want you to sleep in your cum so you remember how nice I am to a disgusting perv like you."
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oh need need need reader being a famous socialite who bruce uses as cover but actually isn't that bad so bruce keeps using them as cover until people start assuming they're dating for realsies .......
⯠SHINING JUST FOR YOU
â gn!reader, fluff
Š ahqkas â all rights reserved. even when credited, these works are prohibited to be reposted, translated or modified
THE GALA WAS PACKED TO THE BRIM, a swirling mess of gothamâs elite draped in velvet and silk, their filled champagne glasses reflecting the crystalline lights above. it was the kind of event where smiles were sharp blades, handshakes were chess moves, and everything felt as calculated as it was extravagant. bruce wayne thrived in this worldânot because he loved it, but because he knew how to play the part.
and you? you werenât a player. you were a queen on the board.
everywhere you went, heads turned. you had an effortless magnetism to you, the kind that made people lean in a little too close, laugh a little too loud at your jokes, and, most importantly, forget to ask too many questions. itâs why a man like bruce had first approached you, months ago, during an event like this one.
youâd been leaning against the bar, champagne flute in hand, watching the room with an air of amused detachment. when bruce had slid into the space next to you, his presence commanding even in its quietness, youâd glanced up at him with a raised eyebrow.
âmr. wayne,â youâd said, your voice smooth and unhurried. the cityâs richest playboy at your disposal? this was going to be fun. âto what do i owe the pleasure?â
âi need a dance partner,â heâd replied simply, his eyes scanning the large crowd of arrogant and spoiled men and women. âsomeone who knows how to handle attention.â
you had tilted your head, intrigued by his simple proposition. youâd be lying if you said you didnât except him to ask you to warm the cold side of his bed. this was a surprise. âwhy me?â
âbecause you know how to shine without blinding anyone,â heâd said, his lips curving into the faintest hint of a smile.
and that was how it started. at first, bruce wayne had used you sparinglyâa date to events where his presence required a certain kind of charm and attention. you were poised, witty, and sharp enough to deflect any intrusive questions. you were also discreet, never prying into why bruce needed a date so often or why heâd leave midway through the night with a vague excuse and a practiced smile.
to him, you were perfect.
but over time, things changed. you werenât just a convenient cover anymore. you were . . . fun.
now, standing at bruceâs side at yet another gala, you could feel the weight of a thousand eyes on you both. bruce, ever composed, was the perfect picture of gothamâs golden boyâpolished and impenetrable. you, however, were the spark in the room, the counterpoint to his quiet stoicism.
âyouâve been quiet tonight,â you murmured quietly, leaning closer to him as if sharing some scandalous secret. your perfume, soft and sweet, teased at his senses.
âam i?â bruce replied, his voice low, though his lips twitched in the faintest smile. it was amusing to him, how well you seemed to know him.
âyouâve only grunted at four people so far,â you teased. âusually, youâre at least at six by now.â
bruce chuckled under his breath, a sound so rare it made you grin in triumph. âmaybe iâm saving them for later.â
your hand brushed his as you reached for a glass of champagne from a passing tray, and it wasnât lost on you how the small gesture sent ripples through the crowd. people were watching you both, their whispers just quiet enough to miss but loud enough to feel.
âdid you hear? bruce wayne is here with a date!â
âit isnât the first time theyâre attending an event together . . . â
âi bet theyâll soon enough become official.â
you didnât let it show, but the whispers made your chest tighten. bruce, as always, seemed unaffected, his mask firmly in place.
by the end of the night, you were seated with him in the back of his car, your shoes kicked off and your head leaning against the window. the city lights streaked past in a blur, and the hum of the engine filled the silence.
âthey think weâre dating,â you said, breaking the quiet.
bruce glanced at you from the corner of his eye, expression unreadable. âdoes it bother you?â
ânot at all. does it bother you?â
he held your gaze for a moment longer than necessary before looking away. âit works, doesnât it?â
âbruce wayne, ever the pragmatist,â you teased lightly, though your chest ached just a little at the impersonal response.
what neither of you saidâwhat neither of you even dared to admit to yourselvesâwas that the lines had begun to blur there.
you noticed it in the small things. the way bruceâs hand lingered on the small of your back when guiding you through a crowded room. the way he asked questions about your day, about your life, as if he genuinely cared. the way he looked at you sometimesâlike you werenât just a convenience, but someone he saw.
bruce noticed it too. the way he found himself seeking your company outside of these events, inviting you to dinner or simply showing up at your door with some excuse about needing your opinion on something. the way your laughter softened the edges of his world, making the darkness he carried feel just a little lighter.
one evening, alfred found the two of you sitting by the fireplace in wayne manor, the soft glow of the flames casting warm light across the room. you were curled up on the couch, one leg tucked beneath you, a glass of wine in hand as you told some story that had bruce actually smilingâa real, genuine smile.
i donât think iâve ever seen him like this, the old butler thought to himself as he retreated quietly, leaving you both to whatever unspoken thing was growing between you.
for bruce, letting someone in had always been a risk. but with you? it didnât feel like a gamble. it felt inevitable.
#bruce wayne x y/n#bruce wayne x you#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne fluff#bruce wayne fic#bruce wayne imagine#bruce wayne headcanon#bruce wayne dc#bruce wayne fanfiction#bruce wayne#reader insert#x reader#dcu x reader#dc comics x reader#dc x reader#dcu comics#batman x y/n#batman x you#batman x reader#batman imagine#batman fic#batman fanfiction
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Desperate Measures
Pairing: Loki x female reader
Word count: 5703
Content / warnings: swearing, a lot of sexual tension, steamy kissing, suggestive humour, tickle fic, implied sex
minors dni: this work does not contain smut, but does contain a romantic and intimate storyline between the reader and an adult-aged character. I am not comfortable with engagement from anyone under the age of 18. Thank you for your understanding and respect.
note: hello! I've come out of the woodwork to drop this random fic, thinking some of you may enjoy some wild sexual tension, teasing, and ruthless ler!loki I felt randomly compelled to write. I can't make any good-faith promises regarding future writing, so I'll just share this for now. All the love <3
The air in the gym was still and heavy, the only sound breaking the silence was the steady rhythm of your fists connecting with the punching bag. You were alone, intentionally so, using the late hour to work through a restless energy that had been gnawing at you for days.
Well, months, really.
There had been something about the Compound lately, something about him that made it hard to focus, hard to sleep.
The leather of the bag thudded under your punches, each strike sharp and measured as you practiced your form. But as effective as the session was at releasing some pent-up tension, you couldnât ignore the nagging realisation that it wasnât quite enough. And you didn't know what would be.
Then you heard him - felt him, really, before he spoke. Lokiâs presence always announced itself in a subtle way. A shift in the air, a sense of something electric.
The low, velvety voice followed, as if materialising from the shadows. âThis hardly seems like a fair fight.â
You froze for the briefest second, your fist still mid-air, before lowering your arm and turning to face him. There he stood, leaning against the doorway, arms crossed casually over his chest. He looked entirely too composed for someone who had just caught you off guard, but that was Lokiâs way. His dark hair framed his sharp features, and his eyes sparkled with that familiar mischief. âRather a waste of energy, fighting something that wonât hit back.â A pause, an assessment, a tilt of his head in challenge. "Wouldn't you agree?"
Your pulse quickens, though youâd never let it show. With Loki, youâd learned to keep your guard up. His constant presence, the lingering stares, the flirtatious banter - you still couldn't tell if it was all fun and games to him, or... if he actually...
âIâm practicing my form,â you replied, trying to keep your tone steady despite the warmth that was starting to spread up your neck.
He smirked, tilting his head as he regarded you with a dark glint in his eye. âIf itâs form youâre after, perhaps a real opponent would better suit your needs. Iâd be happy to assist.â The words hung in the air between you, their weight heavy with invitation.
You hesitated, your heart suddenly pounding for an entirely different reason. Sparring with Loki? Not smart. The man - the god - was unpredictable, dangerous. You werenât an idiot; in the field, youâd leave threats like Loki to the bigger guns like Steve, or Thor. But here, in the controlled environment of the gym, with no weapons and only the hum of underlying tension between you two, it felt different.
Risky in a way that had nothing to do with physical harm.
Still, you felt a thrill shoot through you at the thought. Something about his attention always made you feel alive, a little reckless.
You wiped the sweat from your brow and tilted your head. âNot sure this is a smart idea, Loki. I usually leave the big threats to the super soldiers and gods.â
His smirk deepened, eyes gleaming with dark amusement. âYouâll do just fine.â His tone was smooth, almost coaxing, as if youâd already agreed.
You rolled your eyes, turning toward the mats, feeling his presence at your back as he followed you. You were trying your best to seem unaffected, but his proximity set your skin alight.
Every step toward the sunken sparring area in the centre of the gym felt like a countdown. When you stepped down the couple of stairs onto the mats, you turned to face him, only to find him much closer than you expected. His height, the way he loomed just slightly, was intoxicating. He was so unfairly beautiful. And he knew it.
You gave him a look, a mix of challenge and uncertainty, trying to hide how affected you were. But Loki noticed everything. His eyes flicked briefly to your lips before settling back on your gaze.
âSo what now?â you asked, your voice coming out a bit more breathless than you intended.
âNow,â Loki began, circling you slowly, his movements graceful, predatory, âwe see what youâre truly made of.â
You squared your shoulders, keeping your stance neutral, trying to maintain your focus. But the energy between you felt charged, almost too much to ignore. Loki was testing you, as he always did - pushing buttons, seeing how far he could go before your unaffected facade slipped. You werenât about to give him the satisfaction of showing how much he got under your skin. But, deep down, you knew that you weren't fooling him.
After one revolution around your body, he stopped in front of you, that smirk still playing on his lips. You didnât wait for him to make the first move. You lunged forward, aiming a strike toward his midsection, but he dodged it easily, too fast, too graceful. He didnât retaliate. Not yet. He was baiting you, letting you come to him. Typical.
Your next punch was aimed higher, toward his chest, but he caught your wrist mid-air. His grip was firm, but not painful, his skin cool against yours. He raised an eyebrow, almost amused.
âYouâll have to do better than that,â he murmured.
You twisted out of his hold, stepping back to reassess. Your heart was racing, not just from the sparring, but from the feel of him, his hand, his eyes locked on yours like a predator toying with its prey. There was something dangerous in the way he moved, something inherently sensual in the way his body seemed to flow, effortless yet lethal.
You tried again, going low this time, aiming a sweeping kick toward his legs. He sidestepped, but not fast enough. You caught him just enough to throw him slightly off balance, and his smile widened. You could've sworn a gleam of admiration flickered in his eyes.
âNot bad,â he said, before moving on you.
Suddenly, he was in your pocket, faster than you anticipated, and before you could block, he had you pinned. One arm locked around your waist, pulling you flush against him, the other catching your wrist, holding it firmly above your head. He hooked one leg around yours and controlled the descent of your bodies. Your back hit the mats with a soft thud, him directly above you, and you gasped as the air was knocked from your lungs. Not fully from the impact, more from the overwhelming sensation of his body pressing against yours.
For a moment, everything stilled. You were trapped beneath him, and he was so close, his breath warm against your neck, his body hovering over yours, just a breath away from full contact. The weight of him, the way he held you so effortlessly, sent a rush of heat through you.
Lokiâs eyes bored into yours, dark and intense, and there was no mistaking the shift in the air. The playfulness was still there, but underneath it was something deeper, something charged with heat and anticipation.
âStill think this was a bad idea?â His voice was a low purr, his lips dangerously close.
Your breath hitched, and for a moment, you couldnât find the words. His hand was still wrapped around your wrist, his thumb brushing the inside of it in lazy circles, a deliberate tease. You swallowed hard, trying to ignore the way your pulse jumped beneath his touch, trying not to wonder if he could hear it. Feel it.
He lowered his brow, âYou clearly havenât been trained by anyone outside of Midgard.â
His words pricked at your pride, and you glared up at him, breathless, as you tried to wrench your wrist free. âOf course not,â you retorted, a bit sharper than youâd intended. âNot all of us have had the privilege of an intergalactic education.â
His expression softened for just a heartbeat, a glimmer of something that might've almost be concern, but it was gone as quickly as it had appeared, replaced by a look of pragmatism. âThat wonât do,â he said simply, releasing you, pulling you to your feet with an ease of strength that made your heart stutter.
âThere are⌠larger threats than youâve known. You need to understand how they fight.â His voice dropped to a low rumble. "Or you won't stand a chance."
You swallowed thickly, the implication heavy between you, and found yourself unable to look away, captivated by the intensity in his eyes, the subtle promise that lingered just beneath his calm disposition.
In his own strange way, he was offering to train you.
In that moment, it felt like the tension, the unspoken attraction that had been building between you over the months, was ready to snap. The rational part of you is screaming that this was dangerous, that whatever this was, it was a risk you shouldnât take; putting yourself in the situation to be in constant close quarters with someone who already set you on a steep edge could only end in a heart-wrenching longing.
But as you met Lokiâs gaze, defiance and something far more potent flared within you, and you couldn't deny the pull.
âShow me, then,â you whispered, your voice steady, even as your heart pounded furiously in your chest.
He smirked, a dark satisfaction flickering across his face as he stepped closer still. âVery well,â he murmured, his voice barely more than a breath. âBut donât say I didnât warn you.â
The gym was empty, as it usually was this time of night, save for the low hum of your breathing and the solid thud of your body against the mats, the result of another frustrating sparring session with Loki.
It had been weeks of this. A rhythm thatâd somehow become normal, sparring sessions where you were pushed to your limits and left feeling exhausted but invigorated.
Lokiâs method of training was relentless, unforgiving, and unlike anything youâve ever experienced. The techniques he taught you - sharp, brutal movements, counters that defy human logic - had already sharpened your skills in ways you couldnât have imagined.
He was maddening and insufferable, with his mocking commentary and easy confidence, but he had made you better.
You would flush to admit how much you looked forward to the few sessions each week. Because though you had trained with all kinds of opponents, none of them compared to the dark, infuriating figure currently pinning you to the ground.
He loomed above you, his body pressed just enough against yours to keep you in place, the thin sheen of sweat on your skin making the friction of his hold electric. You were breathless, chest rising and falling as you stared up at him, face inches from his as he flashed that knowing grin.
Unfortunately, this had become a very normal position to find yourself in. Loki never let you win, and never let you up without an admission of defeat, saying allowing such things would only breed complacence.
âReady to surrender, darling?â His voice was dark silk, the smugness woven through every syllable. His eyes traveled over your face, taking in your flushed cheeks, your parted lips as you caught your breath. âAgain? What are we, zero-and-thirty?â
The mix of arrogance and barely-contained amusement in his expression made your irritation bubble over.
"Go to hell."
"Charming," he replied, arching a brow. "By all means, keep on with your futile attempts to escape," he shrugged with indifference, further stoking your frustration. "I do so enjoy this part."
Your jaw ticked. You were tired, flustered, not any more used to his proximity even after weeks of this. You thought you'd be desensitised to his flirting, his touch... him, but, if anything, it was all pulling you closer to the edge of desperation.
And desperate times call for desperate measures.
At least, that's what you told yourself. In reality, you weren't thinking. You couldn't have been thinking, given that no one in your position would've considered such a foolish move.
In a final, desperate move, a slapdash attempt to get him off of you without having to surrender, your fingers darted to his sides, pressing into his ribs in a way that might, with any luck, give him a taste of his own teasing medicine.
But the instant your fingers touched him, and he merely flinched once, you knew you'd made a careless mistake, and a devastating one at that.
This was something you could never take back.
He stilled, a dark chuckle slipping from his lips. His gaze slowly shifted down to where your hands rested on his torso, and when he looked back up, the mischievous gleam in his eyes turned predatory.
âOh?" His voice dropping to a dangerously low, delicious murmur, âYouâve just made an exceptionally poor choice.â
Your stomach dropped, and a tsunami of regret hitting you instantly. âWait. Loki, I didnât-â
âYou want to play, hmm?â His smirk only widened as he leaned in, his grip tightening. âHow delightful. Do carry on.â
âPlease, I'm sorry,â you gasped, trying to push at his chest, already breathless. âI wasn't thinking- Loki, please!â You could feel your cheeks growing warm, laughter bubbling up as he held you firm. "I'm sorry!"
âShh,â he crooned, his smirk deepening. âNo need to waste your precious breath.â
"Oh no, please, not this," you laughed despite your wincing, pushing harder at his shoulders. It did nothing.
âBegging already?â His fingers found your sides, pinning them as his thumbs pressed firmly into the sensitive skin above your hips. âYou might regret that even more, darling.â
Before you could protest, his fingers began to move, an unrelenting, devastating rhythm that sent a jolt of sensation through your body. Your attempts to fight it crumbled instantly as laughter spilled from your lips, your hands still trying, and failing, to push his away.
âLoki! N-no-â you gasped between giggles, squirming beneath him as his fingers worked with merciless precision. He watched you with keen fascination, clearly enjoying the effects of his touch on you far too much. His thumbs traced slow, calculated circles against your ribs, each movement skilled and targeted, attuning his touch at a terrifying speed. Learning how to deliver a masterful torture, designed just for you.
âOh, I think yes,â he replied, his voice a teasing purr. âAnd to think, all it takes to make you crumble is a little tickling. How... adorably human.â His words were as wicked as his touch, his fingers finding every sensitive spot along your ribs, raking over your skin with a tormenting ease.
Your laughter only grew, helpless and unbidden, your body writhing beneath him as you tried to twist away from his relentless fingers. But the press of his body against yours, the heat of his breath, and the smirk on his lips were driving you to the edge in more ways than one.
âYou know,â he continued, one hand slipping higher along your ribs, while the other skated down your side in search of a new vulnerable spot, âyou really should have thought this through.â He watched as you struggled to speak, your protests dissolving into helpless laughter as pinched the soft spot above your hip in a steady rhythm. âBut I suppose thinking things through isnât exactly your strong suit, is it?â
Another fit of giggles burst from you, the words âShut up- Loki, I swear-â managing to slip through the laughter before his searching hand found an especially sensitive spot just above your knee. Your leg jerked, and you could barely contain the yelp that escaped you.
âOh, now that's a good spot, isn't it?â he mused, his smirk widening as he kept his fingers there, watching with satisfaction as you writhed in his grip. His thumb and middle finger cratered into your skin, moving in small, unrelenting circles against the muscle, each pass drawing a louder, more desperate laugh from you.
Every time your laughter began to steady, Loki would adjust, finding fresh angles to torment that same spot, leaving you gasping and breathless, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. The sound of his satisfied chuckle only made the entire ordeal more maddening, his smirk widening with every helpless laugh he drew from you.
The muscles of your core ached, already weakened from the near hour of sparring you'd endured before this ordeal, and your desperation mounted as you realised just how completely you were at his mercy.
âPoor thing,â he murmured, his voice mockingly sympathetic. âAll those threats you make, all those fighting words... yet-"
The door to the gym opened suddenly, and two figures stepped inside. Loki didnât miss a beat, glancing up to find Steve and Bucky standing there, their faces caught between surprise and amusement at the scene before them. Loki merely grinned, unperturbed, as though they were expected guests.
âAh, gentlemen, so kind of you to join us.â His fingers didn't stop, not even for a moment. Your breath hitched between laughs. âSheâs been begging for mercy. Tell me, donât you train your people to withstand a bit of torture?â
âSteve!â you gasped, trying and failing to sit up as Lokiâs fingers dug into your ribs with a terrifying precision. The hand at your knee gave a quick pulse and you shrieked, giving a violent kick of your leg that somehow dislodged his hand. âBucky- help!â
The two men exchanged a look, an unmistakable smirk crossing their faces as they watched you squirm beneath Lokiâs touch, now at both of your sides.
Steve folded his arms, tilting his head as if considering your plea. âSeems like you've bitten off more than you can chew,â he said, lips quirking up in amusement.
âYou're gonna have to get yourself out of this one,â Bucky added with smirk.
"Please!" You squeaked when Loki wrapped his hands around your hips once more, squeezing and pressing as you plead through helpless giggles. "I-I'll do anything- just- j-just help me, please!"
âAnything?â Loki murmurs, his voice low and smooth as he leans down, stilling his hands just long enough for you to catch your breath. âMy, my, this sounds like quite the liability. Is this all it takes to break you?â His fingers latched onto both of your knees with renewed vigour, eliciting a shriek and then a fresh burst of laughter.
You were too far gone to respond, tears gathering in your eyes as you twisted under his touch, utterly powerless to escape. His words, his steady, relentless taunts, were maddening, each one sinking in deeper as his fingers found every vulnerable place that left you laughing helplessly beneath him.
Your cheeks burned as you tried to wriggle away from his fingers, laughter turning desperate as his hands traced the sensitive muscles along your thighs. âL-Loki, pleaseââ
Loki casted a glance at Steve and Bucky, his voice dropping to a lower, more mocking tone. âHer training is sorely lacking. She's reckless, susceptibleâŚ" he looked back down to you with a sly grin, "and seems to lack any sense of risk analysis. Taking me on, indeed.â
You were incredulous - as much as you could be in your position - and you tried to protest, tried to tell them that it was Lokiâs idea to spar in the first place, but the words wonât come. Lokiâs hands had you too helpless, laughter spilling from your lips as he smirked down at you with an expression of pure satisfaction.
Bucky shrugged, grinning as he watched your futile struggle. âMaybe we need to work on conditioning that out of her.â
âOh, no,â Loki interjected smoothly, slipping his hands to the juncture of your hips and thighs, sending you arching off the mat, squeals of laughter tearing from your throat. "I rather like her this way."
Desperation drove you to try to reach for Steve or Bucky, your arm outstretched in a silent plea for mercy.
You should have learned your lesson about desperate moves.
Loki saw the opportunity in your attempt, and with a smooth, precise move, he twisted you onto your stomach, pinning your outstretched wrist to the mat as he settled over you, his other hand slipping to your lower ribs to press into a spot he'd already memorised, one that made you shriek.
âReally, darling,â he whispered darkly, his voice rich with satisfaction, âyour judgment is appallingly poor, isnât it?â His fingers glided higher, hitting a spot on your upper ribs that made your laughter turn silent, breath hitching as you struggled under him.
âYou handed me this opening,â he tutted, his taunting words making you burn hotter. âWhat happens next is your fault.â His fingers found the sensitive spot beneath your arm, drawing out a fresh wave of laughter as your body arched, your feet scrabbling for traction as you slapped your free hand against the mat.
Hard laughter barrelled out of you, your head falling to the mat as you squeezed your eyes shut, succumbing to the sensations he was pulling from your nerves.
Surrender washed over you, cool and easy, as you felt your muscles go limp beneath him, nothing in your mind but the feeling of his body, his hands, the force of your laughter, and the pure, unadulterated fun he was having with you. And it was fun, you realised. In a way that people like you usually didn't indulge in.
Bucky tapped Steve on the arm and jerked his chin towards the door behind them. "Seem like you have this under control," he smirked at you. You looked up to glare but only caught their knowing glance, the one of friends and not of Avengers. The one that said, we know exactly what's going on here.
It made you flush almost as much as the unrelenting torture.
Almost as soon as they left you, Loki's tickling hand pulled away. You gulped greedy breaths in as he turned your sagging body with ease, settling you on your back as he hovered over you, eyes roaming the product of his work.
"I trust you've learned your lesson." His voice was a low rumble that sent heat pooling to your belly. All you could do was nod. "Next time you dare to pull a stunt like that," he started, leaning in so close you could feel his breath fanning your lips, "I won't be so gentle."
Heat bloomed over your cheeks, to the tips of your ears, the space between you charged, crackling with an intensity that sends a thrill through you.
You couldn't look away, your breath catching as his gaze lingered on your lips.
His own parted, as though he was on the verge of closing the distance...
He flinched.
Pulled back. Pulled away.
Your brow lowered in concern, but before you could ask what was wrong, he stood.
"Until next time."
He looked down at you, his eyes lingering with a promise that made your pulse pound, before he turned and strode out of the gym, leaving you sprawled on the mat, breathless, wanting, and hopelessly, maddeningly confused.
It was late that same night when you finally worked up the nerve to confront him.
You moved through the silent halls of the Compound, each step echoing in the darkened corridors as you slipped past the shadows pooling in doorways. Uncertainty crept up your spine, and you almost turned back more than once, only to grit your teeth and push forward. There were too many things left unsaid, too much tension thickening the air between you and Loki, and it gnawed at you now, refusing to let you retreat.
Before you could decide on a way to begin, his door opened. He stood there, almost as if heâd sensed you coming, his expression a mix of curiosity and that ever-present amusement.
âIt's rather late for a visit,â he said, his tone low, his words quiet and full of question.
You met his gaze. âCouldn't sleep,â you replied, massaging the back of your neck with one hand.
His lips twitched with something darker, though his tone remained light. âAnd you thought I could help?â
Silence stretched between you, and for a moment, you wondered if this was a mistake.
"I thought you might be able to, considering it's your fault."
His face softened at the strain in your tone, and he stepped aside in a silent invitation for you to enter.
Swallowing hard, you stepped forward, pressing past him and into his room. He shut the door behind you, and the world seemed to fall away, the dimness settling around you, cocooning you both in a place of shadow and warmth.
"Go on then," Loki urged as you two stood near the lounge set in his room. A couple of armchairs and a matching couch, cast in the soft glow of several lamps and a dying fire in the hearth.
You drew a deep breath, forcing yourself to speak. âI know what you are, Loki,â you began, feeling your voice tremble with both fear and resolve. âMischief is part of your very nature, and I don't mind fun and games like- like earlier," you flushed thinking about it, catching the smirk forming on his features as he watched you fumble.
You gathered your courage and stared him straight-on. "But not with my feelings. All this- this flirting, and touching, and closeness... it's not a game to me. So if it doesn't mean anything to you, I'd rather it stop."
Lokiâs eyes narrowed slightly, the smugness vanishing, replaced by something harder, sharper. He let the words hang between you, a silence stretching before he repeated them in a voice almost too soft to hear. âIf it doesn't mean anything to me,â he murmured, a subtle, dangerous edge to his tone. "You think this- that you are simply a game? Another amusement of no consequence?"
You swallowed, willing yourself to continue. âTodayâŚâ Your voice broke slightly, and you pushed the words out. âIn the gym, we were so close. I thought...â Heat flooded your cheeks, but you forced yourself on, the confession slipping free. âFor the dozenth time, I thought you were finally going to kiss me. But I just left wondering if I'm a fool with some silly schoolgirl crush, way in over my head." The admission left you raw and breathless, your heart pounding.
He exhaled, the smallest hint of a rueful smile ghosting over his lips. "You were trapped beneath me. Pinned, helpless,â he said, as though it explained everything. âI could never take that liberty with you while you were at my mercy.â His gaze grew darker still, something haunted flickering in his eyes. âIâd never forgive myself if I gave in to such an impulse. I'd never stop wondering if you had truly wanted it."
"But I did want-"
"And what if you hadn't?"
His words were a balm and a brand, his unwavering gaze rooting you to the spot.
"I had to know it was real. Not something forced or coerced, something... taken from you when you were too breathless to say no. I had to know for sure that it was what you desired."
For a moment, you struggled to find your voice, the weight of his reverence filling the space between you.
âIt is,â you managed, each word trembling with the strength of your resolve. âI want this. I want you. I canât stop thinking about you, no matter how hard I try. I donât want to ignore it anymore.â You swallowed, breathless.
A beat passed, and something changed in his face - a tension releasing, his expression softening in a way you hadnât expected.
Slowly, he extended his hand, his fingers unfurling in a silent invitation.
You slipped you palm into his, letting him pull you toward him, his touch both a promise and a tether.
He guided you closer, his hands sliding down your arms, tracing the lines of your shoulders, until they rested firmly on your waist. Then, with a gentle insistence, he drew you toward an armchair, lowering himself into it and coaxing you down to settle over his lap, your knees bracketing his thighs.
His hand rose, tilting your chin so that you were forced to look into his eyes. They held an intensity that bordered on unrelenting, darkened by desire and the hint of something raw, something that took your breath away. He watched you intently, his expression filled with something just shy of reverence. His thumb brushed along the curve of your jaw, tilting your face toward him as his fingers trailed along your neck, igniting every nerve.
You shivered as he leaned in, so close that his breath fanned across your lips. His touch was calm and certain, his gaze flicking over you as if committing every part of you to memory.
âIâve waited for this,â he whispered, voice low and heated. âFor you.â
The weight of his words pressed against the heavy silence between you, and before you could answer, he leaned in, his lips finding yours in a kiss that was slow and consuming.
He guided you with a gentle but undeniable command, his mouth pressing deeper, each kiss drawn out, languid, until it felt like he was unraveling you with every deliberate stroke of his lips against yours.
The world blurred, and you melted into him, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as he lured a soft gasp from your lips. His hand slid to the back of your neck, steadying you, keeping you close as he took his time, tasting you, his lips teasing yours until you forgot to breathe.
When you moved to meet his kiss more eagerly, he slowed you, a faint smirk in the curve of his lips as he deepened the kiss with a patience that made your stomach twist. He was savouring this, savouring you, and the way he kissed you - deliberate, knowing - made your entire body ache with need.
His thumb brushed along your cheek, lingering as his other hand settled firmly at your waist, pulling you closer as though he couldnât bear the thought of you slipping away.
Your fingers found their way to the nape of his neck, tangling in his hair as he angled your face, holding you exactly where he wanted. When his tongue brushed lightly over your lower lip, you let out a soft, involuntary sound, and his hand tightened against your waist, holding you to him.
Lokiâs mouth moved over yours with a control that made you shiver, each kiss deliberate, and the quiet dominance in his touch sent warmth pooling through you. With every gentle press of his lips, every slow, teasing stroke, he seduced you, guided you, igniting something deep and undeniable that had simmered for too long. Your heart beat heavily against your ribs, and as you gasped softly, his mouth trailed along your jaw, his lips barely brushing over your skin.
When he finally pulled back, his gaze was dark, his expression full of barely-contained intensity.
A slight smirk tugged at his lips as he ran his thumb along your lower lip, the teasing glint returning to his gaze. âWell, look at you,â he soothed, voice rich with quiet amusement. âI half-expected you to come tearing through that door, seeking vengeance for how thoroughly I put you in your place earlier.â
Heat pooled in your face, and you fought to keep your composure, though it was a losing battle. âIâd have been fine if you hadnât-â
â-handled you so effectively?â he interrupted with an infuriating grin, each syllable soft and mocking. âDonât worry. I rather enjoyed it myself.â
His thumb still lingered on your flushed lips, his eyes glinting with that familiar mischief but something darker, something that felt like an invitation. âStay with me tonight,â he murmured, his voice low and heated, and the words sent a thrill down your spine.
The invitation hung between you, heavy and dark, the desire in his gaze nearly tangible. Your breath hitched, your heart racing at the thought of losing yourself completely in him, of surrendering to this quiet storm between you.
âThat depends,â you managed, barely able to steady your voice. âAre you planning to repeat what happened earlier?â
He chuckled, his fingers tightening on your waist as his eyes glittered with amusement. âOnly if you ask very, very nicely.â
A thrill shot through you as he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours with a dark, velvet whisper. âThat certainly won't be the last time we play like that. Tonight, however... I have other ideas for what to do with you." His fingers trailed up your spine, making you shiver.
Gods help you. He was going to be your undoing.
"I thought I'd take my time, learning you. Slowly. Thoroughly. Every little detail, every sweet noise you can make." His lips skated across the pulse point in your neck. "Would you like that, darling?"
"Yes." You had barely whispered your reply before his lips were on yours again, his mouth moving over yours with a slow, consuming fervour that left no room for questions, no room for anything except the feeling of him, his warmth, his presence, the gentle yet undeniable control in every touch. His fingers threaded through your hair, his hand steadying you as he deepened the kiss, guiding you with a restraint that made you shiver.
You melted into him, your breaths mingling as his hands drifted, his touch both firm and soft, and when he finally pulled back, his gaze held yours with an intensity that left you breathless.
âThis is not a game,â he whispered, a promise in his tone, his thumb tracing light patterns along your neck. His expression was sincere, edged with both longing and restraint. âYou say the word, and weâll stop.â
The words were a quiet echo, a reassurance that grounded you both. A chill of reverence passed between you, something thrilling, something impossibly tender. You met his gaze, nodding as your fingers traced the line of his jaw. âYou too. No pressure, no expectations,â you whispered back, meaning it, and he smiled, a soft, endearing smile that made your heart ache.
And then he guided you back into his arms, every movement slow and deliberate as he kissed you once more, drawing you into a dance that would last until dawn.
#loki x reader#loki x you#loki laufeyson x reader#loki tickle fic#loki#marvel fanfiction#loki reader insert#ticklish!reader#ler!loki x lee!reader#marvel tickle fluff#no y/n
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Good Tidings Your Way Come
Warnings: non/dubcon, allusions to stalking, and other dark elements. Not all kinks or triggers are tagged. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Summary:Â An old face shows up without welcome.
Character: Johnny Storm
Day Three of the December Daze Challenge.
Prompt - new SO at the family dinner
Note:Â As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. Iâm happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
You take out the pies you baked the night before and put them on the shelf, juggling around the contents of the fridge to accommodate prepped dishes. Your meticulously planned schedule is outlined on the magnetic whiteboard. The turkey is in and all else has to be timed precisely. Â
As you get out the stuffed olives to put pit on the wooden board with all the cheeses and crackers, the doorbell rings. You set the jar down and wipe your hands on your apron. You huff as you hurry out of the kitchen.Â
"Why are you knocking?" You call to the door, "go ahead and come on in. You know the rules. Just kick the snow off--"Â
You grab the handle, even as you beckon to the expected visitor. One of a few. Maybe their hands are full. Naima is always far too ambitious. You're not quite sure where your youngest got that from.Â
You blink at the figure on the other side. It isn't who you expect. Not any of your daughters. It's not anyone you would expect to see on the holiday you've been coveting all month, along with the time off.Â
Johnny smiles as he hugs a cardboard box, tufts of tissue paper and bows peeking out over the top. Your face and your heart fall. How did he find you?Â
"Hey, cookie, happy holidays," he winks. "Mmm," he sniffs emphatically, "smells good. You still put cranberries in your stuffing."Â
You cheeks twitch. You clutch the edge of your apron and gulp, "Johnny, what are you doing here?"Â
"Ah, go on, ask me how I found you? You know I hate niceties," he shoves the box towards you, "those are for the girls."Â
"Girls?" You utter.Â
"Naima, Marcie and... what was it...Evelina." He recites as he jiggles the box in his arms. Â
"How--"Â
"Brrr, it's chilly," he steps close until the box presses to you. "Sure is coming down."Â
You stare at him, stunned. You bring your arms up to take the box as he sidles in past you. That little voice that follows you from consciousness to nightmare nags in your ear. Stop him! What are you doing?Â
"Just gotta warm up," he looks around the entry way as he rubs his hands together, his fingers lighting with licking flames as the air ripples with the heat. That's what you're doing. Being smart. "Too bad about the old place. Heard the landlord was pissed."Â
You stare at his hands and the flames that threaten his leather jacket. He's entirely unbothered as his flesh is unaffected by the fire. He parts his hands and snaps his fingers. The flames die.Â
"You know pecan's my fave. You make it this year?"Â
You can't speak. One mistake. One stupid act of charity and now you're cursed. One year isn't long enough yet you don't think he'll wait so long the next tome.Â
"Apple, pumpkin, and pecan," your voice creaks.Â
"Mmm, delicious," he unzips his jacket slowly. "Dessert to go with..." he eyes you up and down, "dessert."Â
"Please, why are you here?"Â
"It's the holidays. It's a time to spend with those who matter--"Â
"Johnny," you plead.Â
"Don't." He snaps, "you always pulled that pathetic act, didn't you? And I spent all that time trying to comfort you only for you to ditch me--"Â
"You... it was a misunderstanding. I only ever wanted a friend," you sniff.Â
"I didn't. I just wanted you but I guess you thought you were too fucking good," he sneers. "Funny, seeing as the ex dumped you for that young EA of his."Â
"Stop--" you say.Â
"Huh, you're right. We don't need to stay hung up on old wounds. It's a time for cheer. To be together." He bends to unlace his boots. "Can't wait to meet the family."Â
You watch him move his boots onto the mat. He stands straight and takes the box back. You shiver as his blue eyes stick to you.Â
"How about you come back tomorrow--"Â
"So you can run again? You're not getting away. Not doing this to me again."Â
"I didnt--" you choke as his eyes blaze a vibrant orange.Â
"This is an old house. Nice. Bet the baseboards are real oak. I mean foundation's probably concrete but not much without walls."Â He smirks as he meets your eye, "so, should we put these under the tree?"Â
"Um, sure," you agree.Â
His threats are subtle but not missed. Your daughters, your home, you. It could all be destroyed by the snap of his fingers. Literally.Â
"Probably a bit awkward at first," he says as he enters the living room without invitation. Â
You close the front door before you follow. You hover at the door anxiously. He bends to put down the box and unpacks each present before delicately placing them under the decorated tree.Â
"I mean, the age difference might be a bit shocking," he stands up with the empty box and it flashes into cinder, falling to the floor in a pile of ash. "Should probably sweep that up, honey."Â
You give him a long look. He doesnât flinch. You leave him to get the broom and dustpan. You return as he nonchalantly paces the room. He admires the decor, toying with the ornaments on the mantel and running his finger along the hanging tinsel. A wisp of smoke wisps after the motion but no sparks fly.Â
You gather up the mess on the floor and dump it in the bin. You shut away the broom and pan. Back in the living room, he admires the hung portraits of your daughters. Heâs very deliberate in his examination.Â
âItâs okay, you know? Weâll work through it as a family. I can only imagine it might be a little weird. To think of how you seduce me. A much younger man than you--âÂ
âJohnny, I get it. You donât have toâIf you just go, we can talk about this later--âÂ
âTalk,â he says sharply. âWe did a lot of that. Talk, talk, talk,â he puppets his hand with the syllables and faces you. âThen you ran.âÂ
âI appreciate everything you did for me, but I wasnât ready--âÂ
âItâs been over a year so are you ready now?â He snickers as he comes closer, âI mean, thatâs rhetorical so...âÂ
Your lip quivers as he stops right in front of you. His gaze bores into you then slowly descends. He brings his hand up to run his thumb across your lower lip as he bites his own. You wince and he angles his hand to grab your chin gruffly.Â
âIâve waited longer than that. Iâve been patient.â He takes a breath and tilts his head dangerously. âIâve known where you are. I sat and I watched. Baby, I gave you all the time you need to get past that deadbeat husband.âÂ
Your lashes web with unspent tears as you pout. You can feel the heat in his hand, ready to singe at his smallest whim. He pulls you toward him and you tense. His breath sizzles around you.Â
He raises his other hand and the air whisks as flames jump to life around his digits. You watch them encase his flesh and the thick golden signet around his middle finger. His eyes follow yours to the spectacle of his fiery touch. He looms it closer to you and chokes a whimper for you. The air roils across your face.Â
He closes his fist and the flames go out. Heâs toying with you. You search his face for any hint of mercy. For any strand of the man you once believed he was. His blue eyes are icy even if his touch is searing.Â
He walks you back and you yelp as he lowers his hand to grab your hip. He spins you and you catch yourself on the armchair just in front of you. He jerks you as he tugs on your jeans, the button tugging before popping out to dangle on the thread. He bares your ass as you brace the frame of the chair.Â
You cry out as hot metal burns into your flesh. He presses his knuckles against your soft flesh as the ring brands a welt into your flesh. He keeps it there until your whining and writhing, his other hand still hooked around your neck.Â
He pulls you back until your spine arches. He steps closer and crushes his hand between your ass and his crotch. He huffs and snarls.Â
âThis time, you wonât forget who you belong to,â he twists his hand so the metal burns deeper into your skin. âNow stop fucking crying. Itâs a special day, we donât need you ruining it.â
There's voices from outside. You know them well. You flick your lashes as Johnny lets you go and swipe away your tears. You can't ruin today, not for your girls.
"That's a good girl. They wouldn't wanna see mommy crying," he heads for the door. "Especially for no reason. No one likes a drama queen."
You suck back the last of your horror. It's just what needs to be done. Not just to keep yourself safe, but to keep them safe. You were wrong when you thought running would do that.Â
#johnny storm#dark johnny storm#dark!johnny storm#johnny storm x reader#drabble#december daze#navy and roo's sleepover#advent calendar#fantastic four#marvel
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pairing. chenle x shy!reader
synopsis. the one where your affection-starved boyfriend keeps asking you for kisses
tags. established relationship, purely fluff, no specific prns used for reader, lmk if anything was missed :D
wc. 0.8k
notes. this is heavily self-indulgent (again) and i have no excuses. why can't all men just be chenle im so srs đđ also can we talk about the dreamies love me right stage like it was SO good (i am still here it is my roman empire),, anw likes and feedback are highly appreciated!
ę° m.list ęą
âbabe, kiss please.â
chenleâs voice is light and teasing, as though the request is the most natural thing in the world. his lips are already puckered, his chin tilted upward just enough to let you know heâs fully expecting to get his way. his arms are sprawled comfortably on the couch, legs stretched out, one sock-clad foot nudging yours beneath the blanket draped over both of you.
you glance at him, already feeling the warmth creeping up your neck. his confidence is unshakable, and itâs maddening how he knows you so wellâknows youâd never outright deny him, especially when heâs in one of these moods.
âbut le,â you stammer, your voice slightly higher than usual, âthatâs the tenth one today.â
your face is already flushed, the heat blooming across your cheeks as you avoid his gaze. you fiddle with the hem of the blanket, trying to appear unaffected, but the small, traitorous quiver in your voice gives you away.
âno one told you to keep count, baby,â he replies smoothly, his lips quirking into a grin that deepens the dimple on his left cheek.
âi know, butâŚâ you trail off, words slipping away as he leans closer, his eyes locked on yours with that mischievous spark that always sets your heart racing.
âkiss?â
his voice is softer now, more of a coax than a command. the single word lingers between you, playful and persistent, as if daring you to resist. his proximity is overwhelming, the faint scent of his cologne that vaguely reminds you of fresh laundry mixing with the warmth radiating from his skin.
you shift slightly, trying to steady your breath, but the couch feels impossibly small. âle,â you murmur, barely audible, and your eyes flit nervously to the muted television.
he tilts his head, his dark eyes wide with mock curiosity. âhmm?â
the late afternoon sunlight streams through the windows, casting soft, golden patterns on the walls. outside, birds chirp faintly, their song weaving into the cozy stillness of the room. the scene is peaceful, but the fluttering in your chest is anything but.
âi just thinkâŚâ you pause, your fingers curling tightly around the edge of the blanket. his presence is so close, so consuming, that forming coherent sentences feels like a monumental task. âi just think youâre doing this on purpose.â
his grin spreads wider, and thereâs a twinkle in his eye that confirms your suspicions. âmaybe i am,â he says, his voice low and lilting. his hand drapes casually over the back of the couch, fingers brushing lightly against your shoulder. âbut what are you going to do about it?â
you puff your cheeks slightly in frustration, your lips pressing into a thin line. âyouâre impossible,â you mutter, though your tone lacks any real bite.
âand youâre adorable,â he counters effortlessly, his teasing edge softening into something sweeter. his gaze lingers on your face, taking in every shy glance and nervous fidget.
the quiet stretches between you again, and for a moment, all you can hear is the rhythmic ticking of the clock on the wall. the weight of his attention feels heavy yet comforting, like a blanket wrapping around you.
âhey.â
you glance up at him hesitantly, and he takes the opportunity to tilt his head slightly, his expression now devoid of the teasing smirk. âyou donât have to if youâre uncomfortable,â he says, his tone sincere in nature.
the sudden shift in his demeanor catches you off guard, and your heart skips a beat. you realize then, with the way his gaze softens and his teasing fades into genuine care, that this is why you never deny him.
your hand hesitates, but eventually, you reach out to brush your fingers against his cheek. his eyes widen slightly in surprise before his grin returns, smaller this time but somehow warmer.
âokay,â you whisper, your voice so quiet youâre not sure he hears you until he leans in again, this time slower, giving you all the space in the world to pull away if you want.
but you donât.
your lips press against his for the briefest moment, featherlight and shy, but itâs enough to make his heart swell. when you pull back, your cheeks are aflame, and you canât bring yourself to meet his gaze.
âsee?â chenle murmurs, his voice tinged with a mixture of pride and affection. ânot so bad, right?â
you swat at his arm, grumbling under your breath, but he just laughs, leaning back against the couch with a contented sigh. âeleven,â you mumble after a moment, counting softly under your breath.
âwhat was that, baby?â he asks, feigning ignorance, though the grin tugging at his lips tells you he heard every word.
you glance at him from the corner of your eye, a small smile tugging at your own lips despite yourself. âthatâs the eleventh one today.â
chenle chuckles, leaning over to press another quick kiss to your temple, his voice low and teasing.
âthen make that twelve.â
#nct fluff#nct dream fluff#chenle fluff#zhong chenle fluff#nct imagines#nct dream imagines#nct drabbles#nct dream drabbles
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am i what you wanted? | fred g. weasley
summary: casual. no strings. just something to forget the loneliness. right? word count: 7.6k masterlist
The air at the party feels heavier than usual, like everyone is trying too hard to pretend theyâre having a good time.
Youâve spent most of the night nursing a drink you donât particularly like, offering polite smiles to people you barely know. Itâs not your scene, but you came anyway because thatâs what friends doâthey drag you out, convince you itâll be âfun,â and leave you regretting it by the second hour.
Youâre just about ready to slip away when you spot himâFred Weasley.
Heâs leaning against the kitchen counter, casual and effortless as always, but thereâs something different tonight. The usual spark in his eyes is dimmer, his smile not quite as wide. Heâs talking to someone, but his gaze keeps drifting, like heâs only half paying attention.
You consider leaving without a word. After all, youâve spent years perfecting the art of avoiding him. Not because you dislike himâquite the opposite.
Your stupid schoolgirl crush on him hasnât quite fizzled out, no matter how much time has passed.
And of course, there was the matter of his latest relationship, a whirlwind romance with someone you considered a friend, Leah.
It would be wrong to approach him now, wouldnât it?
But then Fredâs eyes land on you, and thereâs no escaping. He gives you a faint smile, a shadow of his usual grin, and lifts his drink in a lazy sort of greeting. Itâs an invitation, subtle but unmistakable. Against your better judgment, you cross the room.
âFancy seeing you here,â he says, his voice low enough to cut through the background noise without effort.
You shrug, trying to seem unaffected. âAlicia dragged me out. Said I needed to get a life or something.â
Fred huffs a quiet laugh, looking down into his glass. âSounds like something sheâd say. George said the same to me, actually. Guess misery loves company.â
The comment surprises you. Fred doesnât usually talk like thatâso openly, so vulnerable. Itâs enough to make you pause, to glance at him more carefully. âYou donât seem miserable,â you say, testing the waters.
He doesnât answer right away. Instead, he takes a long sip of his drink and stares past you, like heâs trying to find the right words. âYouâd be surprised,â he finally says, his tone softer now.
Itâs an opening, one you hadnât expected but canât ignore. âWhat happened?â
Fred glances around, his expression unreadable, before gesturing toward the balcony. âDo you mind? Itâs a bit loud in here.â
You follow him outside, where the night air is cool and quiet compared to the chaos inside. He leans against the railing, staring out at the city lights, and you stand beside him, unsure of what to say.
âShe left,â he says abruptly, and it takes you a moment to realize heâs talking about herâhis ex.
âOh.â Itâs all you can manage.
Fred smiles faintly, but thereâs no humor in it. âYeah. Not the dramatic kind of leaving either. No big fight, no slamming doors. Just⌠stopped caring, I guess. Said it wasnât enough for her.â
The confession stirs something in you, a mix of sympathy and something sharper, harder to define.
Youâve never known Fred to be anything but confident, self-assured. Seeing him like thisâguarded, almost uncertainâitâs disarming.
âIâm sorry,â you say quietly, and you mean it.
He glances at you then, really looks at you, and for a moment, it feels like heâs seeing you for the first time. âItâs funny, isnât it? How loneliness sneaks up on you. One day you think youâre fine, and the next, itâs like you canât breathe.â
You nod, because you understand more than youâd like to admit. âYeah. Itâs awful.â
Fred studies you for a moment longer before offering a faint, almost wistful smile. âYou get it.â
The words settle between you, warm and unspoken, and before you can overthink it, you say, âMaybe weâre just terrible at choosing the right people.â
Fred laughs then, a soft, genuine sound that eases some of the tension in your chest. âMaybe we are.â
It feels like an unspoken agreement, a quiet acknowledgment of shared pain. And when he leans just a little closer, his shoulder brushing against yours, you donât pull away.
&
The door slams shut behind you both, barely closed before Fredâs hands are on your waist, pulling you closer. His mouth is on yours again, urgent and consuming, and the world outside this moment ceases to exist.
Youâre not sure how it startedâor maybe you doâbut youâre too caught up in the feel of him, in the way he kisses like heâs unraveling a part of himself heâs never shown anyone.
Your back hits the edge of the couch, but Fred doesnât stop. He moves with you, stumbling through the dark like neither of you can think beyond each other.
You barely make it to the bedroom. A trail of discarded shoes and jackets marks the path, forgotten in the haze.
He pauses only briefly, just enough to catch his breath, his forehead resting against yours. âThisâŚâ he begins, his voice rough, barely a whisper. âThis is what I needed. Something⌠easy. No expectations.â
The words are quiet but land with a weight that sticks somewhere in your chest. You know what he meansâcasual, uncomplicated, something to dull the ache of loneliness he spoke of earlier.
Your heart lurches, but your mind, clouded with want and the intoxicating proximity of him, nods before you can think it through. âYeah,â you murmur, barely above a whisper. âMe too.â
The lie tastes bitter even as the kiss resumes, as his lips trail down your neck, as his hands find your skin. You tell yourself youâre fine with this. Itâs Fred, and itâs what he wants. Isnât it better to have this than nothing at all?
When morning comes, heâs gone.
Youâre not surprisedâhe doesnât strike you as the type to lingerâbut the silence in the room feels deafening. The sheets are cold where he was, and you stare at the ceiling, replaying his words in your head.
Something easy. No expectations.
Your agreement, muffled and uncertain, rings louder now. You agreed. This is what you signed up for. So why does your chest ache? Why does it feel like youâve made a mistake you canât undo?
You sit up, the mess of the night scattered around youâa shirt draped over the chair, an overturned glass on the table. Itâs all so mundane, yet it feels like the air has shifted in your room, like the walls are pressing in.
You bury your face in your hands, letting out a slow, measured breath. Maybe this wasnât the right decision. But you canât change it now. Fred was what you wanted for so long, wasnât he? Maybe this is all you get.
Maybe this is all youâre allowed to have.
You hope you can convince yourself of that.
&
The pub is buzzing, laughter and conversation spilling out from every corner as you sit wedged between Alicia and George.
Fred is across from you, casually leaning back in his chair, a pint of beer balanced between his long fingers. His laughter blends with the noise around you, effortlessly charming, as always.
Itâs easy to forget, in moments like this, that this is supposed to be casual. Easy.
You catch yourself watching him longer than you should, noting the way his hair falls into his eyes when he laughs, the way his smile lingers just enough to make your stomach twist.
You remind yourself to look away.
The conversation circles back to someoneâs recent breakup, a natural segue into a casual remark about Fredâs ex.
Itâs Angelina, sitting two seats down, who says it without maliceâjust an innocent mention of the girl who was once by his side.
âYou were so into her, Fred. Thought you two were endgame, honestly,â she says with a smile, tipping her glass toward him.
Fredâs expression flickers, just for a second, but itâs enough to change the energy at the table. The easy grin falters, his fingers tightening around the glass. âYeah, well,â he says, voice light but guarded, âthings donât always work out the way you think they will.â
The group catches on quickly, steering the conversation elsewhere, but you canât take your eyes off him. Thereâs something in the way his shoulders tense, in the way he avoids eye contact, that makes your chest tighten.
The rest of the evening is a blur of noise and small talk. You find yourself gravitating toward the bar, needing space, needing air. But you donât get far.
Fred appears beside you, leaning on the counter with a quiet sigh. His eyes are darker now, shadows of something unspoken behind them. He doesnât say anything, just glances at you, and suddenly the air feels heavier.
âCome with me,â he mutters all of the sudden, so low you almost donât hear it.
You hesitate, your heart skipping, but you follow.
He leads you down a narrow hallway, past the kitchen, until youâre standing outside the bathroom door. He checks once over his shoulder before pulling you in, locking the door behind him.
âFred, what are youââ
He cuts you off, his mouth crashing into yours with a force that takes your breath away.
Itâs messy, hurried, like heâs trying to drown something out. His hands find your waist, pressing you against the cold tile wall, and you can feel the tension in his grip, the desperation in the way he kisses you.
Itâs different this timeâmore frantic, less controlled. Thereâs no room to think, no space for words, just the heat of him against you and the quiet hum of the pub muffled beyond the door.
When itâs over, youâre both catching your breath, the silence settling around you like a weight. Fredâs forehead rests against yours, and for a moment, it feels like he might say somethingâsomething real, something vulnerable.
But then he steps back, adjusting his shirt, his eyes not quite meeting yours. âThanks,â he mutters, almost too softly, and the word hits you like a slap.
You blink, trying to find something to say, but heâs already unlocking the door, slipping out like nothing happened.
Youâre left standing there, the cold tiles against your back, your pulse still racing. You stare at the empty space where he was, your mind replaying the moment in vivid detail.
Something about this feels wrong. But then again, wasnât this what you agreed to?
&
Itâs late. Later than late, really, with the kind of stillness in the air that only comes when the rest of the world is sleeping.
But youâre wide awake, perched on the edge of your couch with a half-empty glass of wine in your hand, listening to the faint hum of the city outside.
You donât know why youâre waiting.
Or maybe you do, but admitting it feels like giving it more weight than it deserves.
Itâs been a few days since you saw Fredâsince he showed up at your door for the first time, with that crooked smile and a cocky, unspoken challenge in his eyes.
You hadnât known what to expect then, and you still donât know now. But when you hear the knock at your door, your chest tightens in anticipation anyway.
You set the glass down and cross the room, opening the door to find him leaning against the frame, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his jacket.
âBit late for a social call, donât you think?â you tease, though your voice wavers just slightly.
Fred grins, that easy, practiced grin that always feels like itâs hiding something. âThought you might say that. But then, youâre still awake, arenât you?â
You roll your eyes and step aside, letting him in. He walks past you, his steps slow and deliberate, like heâs taking his time to assess the space.
Itâs not the first time heâs been here, but he looks around like it is, his gaze lingering on the small details youâd never think to notice.
âYou always keep it this tidy?â he asks, turning to face you with a smirk.
âI knew you were coming, didnât I?â you shoot back, closing the door behind him.
Fred laughs, the sound low and warm, and suddenly the room feels smaller.
Itâs always like this with himâthis electric push and pull that leaves you feeling off-balance and exhilarated all at once.
He shrugs off his jacket, tossing it carelessly onto the back of a chair, and then heâs sitting on your couch like heâs been doing it for years.
You join him, keeping a safe distance between you, but it doesnât matter. The tension fills the space anyway, a quiet, unspoken thing neither of you is willing to address.
âSo,â Fred says, his eyes flicking to the wine glass you left on the table. âDrinking alone, are we? Rough night?â
You laugh softly, shaking your head. âNot rough. Just⌠quiet.â
Fred hums, leaning back and stretching an arm along the back of the couch. His fingers are close enough to brush your shoulder, but they donât.
âWell,â he says after a beat, âIâm good at making noise. Want me to liven things up?â
You turn to look at him, arching a brow at his choice of words. âThat depends. What exactly do you have in mind?â
He grins again, wider this time, and before you know it, youâre caught up in one of his ridiculous storiesâsomething about a prank that went wrong back at Hogwarts and ended with George covered in soot and screaming about cursed cauldrons.
Youâre laughing so hard your sides hurt, the kind of laugh that feels like itâs shaking loose all the tension youâve been carrying for days. Fred is laughing too, his head thrown back, his shoulders shaking.
And for a moment, itâs easy to forget the doubts gnawing at the edges of your mind.
But then the story ends, and the laughter fades, and the room feels too quiet again.
Fredâs laughter dies in his throat first. He turns his head toward you, the space between you charged, his expression softening as his eyes flicker to your lips.
âYouâre staring,â you whisper, trying to keep your tone light, but your pulse betrays you.
âAm I?â he murmurs back, his voice low and teasing, but thereâs something in his gaze that makes it hard to breathe.
You donât know who moves firstâmaybe itâs him, maybe itâs youâbut suddenly, the space between you disappears. His mouth meets yours in a rush of heat and hunger, and your body reacts without thought, your hands tangling in his hair as he pulls you closer.
He tastes like mint and something else, something unmistakably Fred, and for a moment, it feels like the rest of the world doesnât exist.
It starts like it always doesâfeverish and desperate, hands searching, breaths stolen. Fredâs hands find the hem of your shirt, tugging it over your head, and your back hits the cushions of the couch before you even realize youâve moved.
But somewhere in the middle of itâbetween the hurried kisses and the whispered cursesâsomething shifts.
His touch slows, his fingers trailing along your skin with an almost reverent softness. He presses his forehead to yours, his breath warm against your lips, and for a fleeting moment, it feels like thereâs more to this than just a casual arrangement.
Your chest tightens, and you open your mouth to say something, anything, but the words catch in your throat.
Fred pulls back slightly, just enough to look at you, his eyes searching yours like heâs trying to figure out if you feel it too.
But then the moment passes, and he closes his eyes, shaking his head like heâs dismissing some unwelcome thought. He presses a lingering kiss to your collarbone before shifting his weight and standing, grabbing his jacket from the chair.
âLeaving already?â you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
Fred hesitates, his back to you. âYeah,â he says, his tone lighter than the moment calls for. âGotta keep you wanting more, donât I?â
The grin he throws over his shoulder is forced, you think, but you donât call him on it.
You watch him leave, the door clicking shut behind him, and youâre left alone again, your chest tight and your mind racing.
This is what you signed up for, you remind yourself. Casual. Fun. No strings attached.
So why does it already feel like so much more?
&
The party isnât much different from the last one. A haze of laughter and music hangs in the air, the dimly lit living room thrumming with energy as bodies mill about. Youâre leaning against a wall, clutching a drink, when you spot him across the room.
Fred.
Your breath catchesânot because you didnât expect him to be here, but because itâs the first time youâve seen him like this since everything began.
In the few weeks since that night, heâs always shown up at your door under cover of darkness, a secret that slips away before the world wakes. Now, heâs here, among friends, out in the open. It feels⌠surreal.
His eyes catch yours, a flicker of something unreadable crossing his face before he looks away. You should probably do the same, pretend heâs just another person at the party, someone you barely know outside of shared jokes and casual conversations.
But something about seeing him here, the same Fred everyone else knows, tangles in your chest.
The game between you feels different now. Riskier.
You manage to avoid each other for most of the night, though youâre painfully aware of him. The way his laugh carries over the music. The effortless charm in the way he leans against the kitchen counter, surrounded by people.
But itâs when you least expect it that it happens.
Youâve slipped into the quiet hallway, hoping for a moment to breathe. He appears from nowhere, leaning casually against the wall a few feet away. His hands are shoved in his pockets, and he looks at you like youâre the only person in the world.
âYouâve been avoiding me,â he says, low enough that no one else could hear.
You swallow, refusing to meet his gaze. âYouâve been avoiding me too.â
A ghost of a smirk crosses his face. âFair enough.â
For a moment, neither of you speaks. The silence stretches, filled only by the distant hum of the party, the bass thudding like a heartbeat. Then he shifts closerâtoo close, considering the thin walls and prying eyes just a room away.
âThis is risky,â you murmur, though you donât move away.
âSince when do you mind risky?â he counters, his voice teasing but quiet. Thereâs a flicker of warmth in his tone, a reminder of those moments when heâs let his guard down just enough to let you in.
You should push him away, but you donât.
Instead, you glance up, and for the briefest second, he looks at you like heâs about to say something important. Something real. But he doesnât. Heâs Fred, after all.
Instead, his hand brushes yours, a fleeting touch that sends a shiver down your spine. âYou know I shouldnât be here,â he mutters, more to himself than to you.
You hesitate, your chest tightening. âThen why are you?â
He doesnât answer right away. His fingers graze your wrist, light and hesitant, before he steps back, creating a distance that feels far too wide.
âI shouldnât be,â he says again, as though repeating it will make it true. Then, softer, âBut I am.â
The air between you feels heavier than it should. Heâs pulling away again, retreating into the shell of secrecy heâs so carefully built. It frustrates you more than it should.
âYou donât have to make this so complicated,â you say, surprising even yourself.
Fredâs jaw tightens. He glances at the door leading back to the party, his gaze distant, before his eyes flicker back to you. âYou think itâs that easy?â
You donât answer, because you donât know how to.
Instead, he leans in, his voice a whisper. âCareful. Someone might see us.â His words are teasing, but thereâs an edge of something sharper beneath them.
And then heâs gone, disappearing back into the crowd as though nothing happened.
Youâre left standing there, your heart racing and your thoughts tangled in ways you canât quite unravel.
The rest of the night passes in a blur. You donât see him again, but his presence lingers like a shadow, like a secret you canât escape.
And when you finally leave the party, stepping out into the cool night air, you canât help but wonder if this game youâre playing is one youâll ever winâor if itâs one youâll lose before it even truly begins.
&
Itâs been days since the party.
Days of wondering if Fred will show up again, if youâll hear that familiar knock on your door in the dead of night. He doesnât call, doesnât send any owlânot that you expected him to. But his absence still gnaws at you.
When the knock finally comes, itâs past midnight. You hesitate for a moment, standing barefoot in the hallway, staring at the door like it might vanish if you blink. Then, as if on instinct, you reach for the handle.
Fred is there, leaning against the frame, his hair tousled, his expression unreadable. He doesnât say anything, just steps inside, his hands finding your waist almost immediately.
Itâs fast, like always. A trail of kisses down your neck, murmured words you can barely catch, and then youâre stumbling toward the bedroom. Itâs almost routine nowâthe way he knows exactly how to pull you apart, the way he leaves before the sun comes up.
Itâs the same pattern, the same urgency, like heâs trying to chase away whateverâs haunting him.
Only this time, he leaves without saying much of anything. A quick glance back, a muttered âIâll see you,â and then the door clicks shut behind him.
The quiet that follows feels heavier than it should. You sit on the edge of the bed for a long time, staring at the empty doorway, wondering why the familiar ache feels sharper tonight.
&
Aliciaâs offer couldnât come at a better time. âYou need a reset,â she says, twirling her straw in her iced tea. âSeriously, this guy is perfect. Smart, funny, normal. Give it a shot.â
Itâs not like you have anything better to do, so you agree.
The date is fine. Fine. Paul is niceâcharming, evenâbut thereâs no spark. By the end of the night, youâre both laughing about how youâd make better friends than anything else.
Itâs late when you finally get home, the streets quiet and dimly lit. Youâre fishing for your keys when you notice the shadow near your door.
Fred.
Heâs leaning against the frame, his hands stuffed into his pockets. He looks up as you approach, his gaze flickering to the key in your hand before settling on your face.
âYouâre out late,â he says, his voice casual.
âI had plans,â you reply, matching his tone as you unlock the door. You donât elaborate, and neither does he.
Inside, the tension follows you, crackling in the air as you set your bag down and turn to face him. Heâs watching you, his expression neutral but his shoulders taut, like heâs holding something back.
âHow were the plans?â he asks, his voice steady, but thereâs an edge to it you canât quite place.
âThey were fine,â you say. âWeâre better off as friends.â
He nods, his lips pressing into a thin line, and for a moment, you think thatâs the end of it. But then heâs stepping closer, his hands finding your waist like they always do.
This time, itâs different. His kisses are rougher, his grip firmer, but thereâs something else underneath itâa quiet desperation, like heâs trying to claim something without admitting it. His hands linger longer, his lips move slower, and you let yourself lean into it, pretending not to notice the shift.
Afterward, heâs quiet again, lying beside you in the dark. The air feels heavier, and you can sense the walls going back up before he even moves to get dressed.
As he pulls on his shirt, he pauses, standing by the door with his back to you. For a moment, it seems like heâs about to say something, but instead, he runs a hand through his hair and exhales softly.
Then, just before he leaves, he glances back over his shoulder, his gaze flickering to yours. âLet me know when youâre too busy.â
Itâs barely a whisper, so quiet you almost miss it. But thereâs something in the way he says it, something unsaid lurking beneath the words, that lingers long after heâs gone.
You sit there in the dark, replaying the moment over and over, wondering why it feels like he just said goodbye.
&
Angelinaâs birthday party is already in full swing by the time you stumble through the door, only half-committed to being there. The laughter, the music, the clinking of glassesâitâs all too loud, too bright, too much.
But you came anyway, maybe out of habit, or maybe because part of you hoped youâd find a distraction in the chaos.
Fred is here. You noticed him immediately. Heâs impossible not to notice, leaning against the bar, his easy smile tugging at something in your chest youâve been trying to ignore. He hasnât come near you, hasnât even spared you more than a glance. But that glanceâit felt like it saw too much.
You bury your feelings in your drink, letting the bitterness of it settle the knots in your stomach. It doesnât help.
âAlright, whatâs with the face?â Aliciaâs voice cuts through the noise as she drops onto the couch beside you. âYou look like someone just ran over your cat.â
âIâm fine,â you lie, swirling the last of your drink. âJustâŚthinking.â
âAbout your nonexistent love life again?â she teases, nudging your shoulder. âSeriously, you need to loosen up. Or at least stop picking all the wrong people.â
You force a laugh, but it feels hollow. Alicia doesnât know. No one does. Youâve kept Fred a secret, just as he asked. The weight of it presses heavier tonight, threatening to spill over as you down the rest of your drink and reach for another.
As the night goes on, the alcohol blurs the edges of everything. Faces blend together, voices turn to static, and youâre left moping in the corner, the ache in your chest louder than any song playing.
Fredâs there, somewhere. Youâve caught glimpses of himâhis easy posture stiffened, his smile more strained than usual. But he doesnât approach, and you donât give him the satisfaction of looking too long.
By the end of the night, most people have left, and the crowd has thinned out. Youâre sitting on the couch, staring at the bottom of your empty glass, when a shadow falls over you.
âLetâs get you home,â Fred says, his voice low but firm.
You look up at him, the alcohol dulling your usual instincts. âI donât need your help.â
âYes, you do.â His tone leaves no room for argument, but thereâs something gentler in his gaze, something that makes your chest tighten.
You donât resist when he helps you up, his arm steady around your waist as he guides you out the door. The walk home is quiet, the chill of the night air biting at your skin. Fred doesnât say much, and neither do you, but the silence feels heavier than usual.
When you finally reach your flat, he helps you inside, sitting you down on the couch as he disappears into the kitchen. He returns with a glass of water, kneeling in front of you.
âDrink,â he says simply.
You take the glass, your hands shaking slightly as you bring it to your lips.
âFred,â you start after a moment, your voice barely above a whisper. âStay.â
He looks at you, startled by the request. âIââ
âPlease.â The word spills out before you can stop it, raw and pleading. âJust for the night. I donât want to be alone.â
He hesitates, his expression flickering between something unreadable and something achingly vulnerable. Then, finally, he nods. âAlright.â
Relief washes over you as he helps you to your feet again, guiding you to your bedroom. Heâs careful as he tucks you into bed, his hand lingering briefly on your shoulder before he steps back.
âYouâll stay?â you ask again, your voice softer now.
âIâll stay,â he promises, his voice low and steady.
You donât remember falling asleep.
When you wake up, the room is quiet, the sunlight streaming through the curtains. For a moment, you lie there, disoriented, the haze of last night still clinging to your thoughts.
Then you notice itâthe bed is empty.
Your stomach drops, a hollow ache blooming in your chest as you sit up. The other side of the bed is cool to the touch, and for a moment, you wonder if he left as soon as you fell asleep. The ache sharpens, and you feel foolish for believing heâd actually stay.
Swinging your legs over the side of the bed, you bury your face in your hands. Of course, he left. Of course, this is what it always is with himâhalf-hearted promises and fleeting moments that never mean as much as you want them to.
Itâs only when you lower your hands that you notice it.
A glass of water and a small packet of painkillers sit neatly on the nightstand.
Your breath catches as you reach for the glass, the pieces falling together in your mind. The bed might be cool now, but the faint warmth lingering on the pillow tells a different story.
And then you hear itâthe faint click of your front door closing.
Your chest tightens, your heart pounding as you realize the truth: Fred stayed. He kept his promise.
The ache in your chest softens, replaced by something you canât quite name. Itâs not relief, not entirely. Itâs something more fragile, more complicated.
He stayed.
And for now, thatâs enough.
&
The pub feels suffocating tonight, the air heavy with laughter and music thatâs a touch too loud. Youâre sitting at the edge of the booth again, nursing the remnants of your drink while the conversation at the table flows around you. Fred is there too, only a few feet away but worlds apart, as always.
At least, thatâs how itâs supposed to be.
But tonight, something is different. Youâve caught him looking at you more than once, a flicker of warmth in his gaze that lingers just a moment too long before he turns away.
And then there are the little thingsâhow he slid the drinks menu your way when you couldnât reach, the casual way his hand brushed yours when passing the salt, and the faint smirk on his lips when you dropped your napkin, like he found your clumsiness amusing.
Itâs maddening. These small, almost imperceptible gestures that would mean nothing if it were anyone else, but with Fred, they feel like everything.
You glance his way now, trying not to linger. Heâs leaned back in his chair, his long fingers drumming lazily against the table, his attention seemingly on George, whoâs telling some animated story about a prank gone wrong. But then, as if he feels your eyes on him, Fred looks up.
The corners of his mouth twitch, and there it is againâthat fleeting, private smile that feels like itâs meant just for you.
Itâs a cruel kind of softness. The kind that makes you want more.
âLeaving soon?â His voice pulls you back, low enough that it barely cuts through the noise, and you realize heâs speaking to you.
Your heart skips. You shrug, trying to feign indifference. âMaybe. You?â
His smirk deepens, something unreadable flickering in his eyes. âNot yet.â
The words hang between you, unspoken but understood. The plan forms, unspoken as always. Youâll leave first, and heâll follow.
When the clock creeps toward midnight, you push yourself up, offering the table a vague excuse about an early morning. Fred doesnât look at you, but you can feel the tension, the way his fingers still against the table as you grab your things and step into the cool night air.
The sharp contrast of the quiet street is a relief at first, but it doesnât last. Your thoughts churn, the familiar mix of guilt and longing rising to the surface. You shake your head, trying to focus on the walk home when you see her.
Leah.
Sheâs leaning against the wall just outside the pub, her arms crossed, the faint glow of a cigarette in her hand. She looks up when she hears you, her face illuminated by the streetlamp above.
âHey,â she says, her tone casual but her gaze sharp.
You freeze, your chest tightening. âHey.â
Her lips quirk into something thatâs not quite a smile, and she takes a slow drag of her cigarette before exhaling, the smoke curling into the air between you.
âYouâve been quiet tonight,â she says, tilting her head slightly.
She mustâve watched youâyou hadnât even noticed her in the pub. Had Fred?
You force a shrug, your voice tight. âLong day.â
She hums, her eyes narrowing just a fraction. âFred seemed to have been distracted too. Mustâve been one of those days for everyone, huh?â
The mention of his name sends a jolt through you, but you keep your expression as neutral as you can manage. âYeah, maybe.â
Leah watches you for a moment longer, her gaze unsettlingly calm. She takes another drag before flicking the cigarette to the ground, crushing it under her heel. âYou two seemed friendly tonight.â
Your stomach twists, but you donât falter. âWeâre all friends, arenât we?â
Her lips press together, her expression unreadable. âSure.â
The pub door swings open, the sound spilling into the street, and your heart sinks as Fred steps out. His hair is a little messy, his face flushed from the warmth of the pub. He glances around, his eyes landing on you almost immediately.
âThere you are,â he says, his tone light as he steps closer. âWhatâs taking so long? I thought youâdââ
His words die as his gaze shifts, landing on Leah.
His smile falters, and for a moment, the easy confidence he always carries slips. âLeah.â
âFred,â she says smoothly, her tone neutral but her eyes sharp as they flick between the two of you.
He straightens, shoving his hands into his pockets as the tension thickens.
âWhatâs going on?â he asks, his voice tighter now.
You feel like the air has been sucked out of your lungs. You glance between them, your chest tightening. You canât do this. The weight of the secrecy, the guilt, the unspoken accusationsâitâs too much.
âI was just leaving,â you say quickly, your voice steadier than you feel.
Fredâs gaze snaps to you, his brow furrowing. âWaitââ
âIâll see you later,â you cut him off, stepping away before either of them can stop you.
You wonât see him later, youâre sure of it.
The last thing you hear as you walk away is Fredâs voice, quieter now but still tinged with something you canât quite place.
âLeah, we should talk.â
You donât look back. You canât.
&
Youâre lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. The faint hum of the city outside is no comfort tonight. Itâs too quiet, too still, and your mind refuses to stop racing.
You picture them togetherâFred and Leah. You imagine their conversation, her calm but sharp gaze and his uneasy expression. Maybe theyâre sitting close, voices low and familiar, smoothing over the jagged edges of their breakup. Maybe theyâll work things out. Maybe theyâre already back together.
The thought is a knife to the chest, twisting deeper with every passing second. You roll onto your side, pulling the blankets tighter around you, but it doesnât help. The ache is relentless, carving itself into every corner of your heart.
Hours pass. The clock on your nightstand glows faintly, marking the time youâve spent wide awake. 2:47 a.m. Your body is heavy with exhaustion, but your mind wonât let you rest.
You try to reason with yourself. Fred never promised you anything. This was always supposed to be casual, meaninglessâa fleeting distraction for both of you. You knew that. You agreed to it.
And yet.
A sharp knock cuts through the silence, jolting you upright. For a moment, you freeze, your breath catching in your throat.
Another knock.
You stumble out of bed, heart pounding, and shuffle to the door. When you open it, Fred is standing there, his hair disheveled, his shirt wrinkled like heâd left in a hurry. The faint light of the hallway casts shadows across his face, but his eyes are clear, intense.
You canât speak. You just step aside, and he walks in without a word.
The door closes behind him, the lock clicking softly into place. He turns to you, his gaze searching, but whatever heâs looking for, he doesnât say. He just steps closer, his hands brushing against your arms before they settle on your waist, pulling you toward him.
There are no questions, no explanations. Just his mouth on yours, slow and deliberate, like heâs memorizing the way you feel.
Itâs different this time.
The usual rush of urgency is gone, replaced by something quieter, softer. He touches you like youâre fragile, like heâs afraid youâll slip through his fingers if heâs not careful. His hands linger, tracing patterns on your skin, and his lips trail down your neck with an almost reverent slowness.
When he lifts you, carrying you to the bed, itâs not hurried or thoughtless. He lays you down gently, his weight pressing into you as his lips find yours again.
Itâs almost too much. The tenderness, the quiet intensityâitâs overwhelming in a way that makes your chest ache.
Somewhere in the back of your mind, you wonder if this is goodbye. If this is Fredâs way of ending things, giving you something to remember before he walks away for good.
The thought makes your throat tighten, but you donât stop him. You canât.
When itâs over, you lie there in the dark, the sheets tangled around you, his arm draped loosely over your waist. His breathing is steady, his body warm against yours, and for a moment, you let yourself pretend that this is enough. That this could be enough.
But then he stirs, pulling away.
You turn to watch him as he sits on the edge of the bed, running a hand through his hair. He doesnât look at you as he stands, gathering his clothes and pulling them on with quiet efficiency.
Your chest tightens, but you donât say anything. You just watch as he moves to the door.
He hesitates, his hand on the knob, and for a moment, you think he might say something. But he doesnât. He just turns back to you, his expression unreadable, and steps closer.
He leans down, pressing his lips to your forehead in a soft, lingering kiss.
Itâs the kind of tenderness heâs never shown before, the kind that makes your heart break even as it swells.
When he pulls back, his eyes meet yours for a brief moment. Thereâs something there, something unspoken, but before you can grasp it, heâs gone.
The door clicks shut behind him, and youâre alone again.
You lie there, staring at the ceiling, the ache in your chest heavier than ever.
This is goodbye, you think.
You close your eyes, but sleep doesnât come.
&
The weeks without Fred are a blur of emotions, each one more exhausting than the last. Some days, you manage to feel like yourself again, like the world might not actually end without him. Other days, the grief hits you like a wave, dragging you under with the weight of all the unsaid words and the things you wished couldâve been.
Your friends help, of course. Alicia keeps you busy with plans you donât want to make, and Angelina sends you pep talks at odd hours of the night. But thereâs a hollow ache they canât touch, a space inside you carved out by Fred and left empty when he walked away.
You try to fill it with distractionsânew books, long walks, even the occasional half-hearted dateâbut nothing works. Because no matter what youâre doing, your thoughts always circle back to him. To the warmth of his hands, the sound of his laugh, the way he looked at you that night before he left.
The worst part is the silence.
For weeks, thereâs no word from Fred. No knocks at your door, no teasing notes slipped under the frame. Heâs just⌠gone. And while you tell yourself thatâs what you wantedâthat itâs for the bestâyou canât stop wondering where he is. What heâs doing. If heâs with her.
And then, one day, the silence breaks.
Itâs mid-afternoon, and youâre home, though you have no memory of how you spent the morning. The hours have blurred together in a haze of restless pacing and half-formed thoughts, none of which have brought you any peace.
When the knock comes, you almost donât hear it. Itâs soft, tentative, like the person on the other side isnât sure theyâre welcome.
Your heart stutters.
You tell yourself itâs probably Alicia or Angelina, or maybe even Leah. But when you open the door, itâs Fred.
He looks different in the daylight. Thereâs no mischievous grin, no late-night bravado. Just him, standing on your doorstep, his shoulders tense and his hands shoved deep into his pockets.
âHi,â he says, his voice quieter than youâve ever heard it.
You stare at him, unsure whether to laugh, cry, or slam the door in his face. âWhat are you doing here?â
Fred shifts, glancing past you into the flat before meeting your gaze again. âCan I come in?â
You want to say no. You want to tell him to leave, to take all the chaos and heartbreak heâs brought into your life and walk away for good. But instead, you step aside, letting him in.
Fred moves to the middle of the room and stops, his eyes scanning the space like heâs trying to memorize it. He doesnât sit, doesnât relax, just stands there, his weight shifting from foot to foot.
âI didnât know if youâd let me in,â he admits after a moment.
âWhy are you here, Fred?â you ask, crossing your arms over your chest.
His eyes flicker with something you canât quite placeâguilt, maybe, or fear. âI needed to see you. To explain.â
âExplain what? That you left? That you couldnât give me what I wanted? What I needed?â Your voice wavers, betraying the anger youâve been holding onto for weeks.
Fred flinches but doesnât look away. âYes. All of it.â
For a moment, neither of you speaks.
âI was a mess when we started this,â he says finally, his voice low and steady. âLeah and I were over, but I wasnât okay. I told myself I didnât want anything serious, that I couldnât handle it. And then youâŚâ
You hold your breath, waiting for him to continue.
âYou made me feel like I could handle it,â Fred says, his gaze dropping to the floor. âAnd that scared me. It made me feel wrong, like I was moving on too fast. Like I didnât deserve it.â
You blink, his words sinking in.
âI pushed you away because I was scared,â he admits, meeting your eyes again. âBut that doesnât excuse what I did. I hurt you, and I hate myself for it.â
You swallow hard, your throat tight. âAnd now? Are you still scared?â
âYes,â Fred says without hesitation. âBut Iâm more scared of not being with you. Of letting you slip away because I was too much of a coward to fight for this.â
Your breath catches, your chest tightening with a mix of hope and fear. âAnd what happens when it gets hard again? When you start to feel like itâs too much?â
Fred takes a step closer, his expression earnest. âThen Iâll tell you. And weâll figure it out together. Because Iâm done running, and Iâm done pretending this doesnât mean something.â
The sincerity in his voice is almost too much. You look away, your hands trembling as you try to keep your emotions in check.
âWhat are you asking for, Fred?â you whisper.
He hesitates, and for a moment, you think he might not answer. Then he reaches out, his fingers brushing yours. âIâm asking for a chance. To do this right. To give you what youâve always deserved.â
You close your eyes, his words washing over you like a wave.
âOkay,â you say finally, your voice barely audible. âBut we take it slow. No more secrets, no more running. We do this the right way.â
Fred nods, a small, relieved smile breaking through his tension. âSlow. Got it.â
He steps back then, extending a hand like heâs meeting you for the first time. âHi. Iâm Fred. Nice to meet you.â
You laugh, the sound a little shaky but genuine. âNice to meet you, Fred.â
For a moment, you let yourself smile, the tension in your chest loosening just a little. Then you glance at his outstretched hand, raising an eyebrow. âThough I have to say, you look a lot like this guy I used to know. Total pain in the arse, but surprisingly charming when he wanted to be.â
Fred grins, his eyes lighting up in that way that always makes your heart skip a beat. âWell, Iâm hoping Iâm nothing like him. He sounds awful.â
âHe was,â you say, shaking his hand firmly. âBut I think you might be an improvement.â
Fred laughs, the sound warm and unrestrained, and for the first time in weeks, you feel like you can breathe again.
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