#i am so happy and now I will keep re-reading this for the rest of the evening 🥺

[yelenasdiary]

Hello…I didn’t expect to make this request, but I didn’t know who else to turn to, and you’re the most active writer I’ve followed for so long that is still around. (And I’m happy for that, sincerely)

Well, before I request something, let me explain why. I…I’m saying goodbye. (Not that way, don’t worry) I’m saying goodbye…to the fandom…specifically, to reading Natasha x reader fics. I tried for a while to hope for fics where Reader was more of the knight in shining armor, masc presenting woman, or the top in the relationship, but…well, that didn’t happen much. And I’m not bashing on anyone for writing reader as more of the opposite. Not at all, everyone is entitled to write how they want to write….but I can’t just keep coming here and continue to see it be the same troupe. And no matter how much I request for one (and when requests are asked and open) it never happens, and instead it’s something else I didn’t request. So…I think it’s best for me to bid farewell. I cant force writers to write what I want, that’s not how it works. It’s a dick move

Here’s what I want to ask…for my final Natasha x reader fic request:

Reader is a soldier for the United States Air Force. Natasha has been busy as an Avenger. Reader, on leave, tried to spend time with Natasha but was always met with rain checks. On top of that, Natasha has always treated reader as the frail, need to protect, girlfriend, and reader always made it clear she wasn’t much for the pillow process type.

Anyways, reader decides to re-enlist for another deployment and begin a new life, maybe somewhere in Germany I don’t know. But, as she’s packing to leave is when Natasha FINALLY decides to give her the time of day….but it’s too late.

Reader sits Natasha down and says along the lines this, “I’m not the person you want…and we’ve just become different people and are pursuing different things….” She’d go on about how as much as she loves Natasha, she can’t be the partner she expects of her. She’s tired of being made out to be this woman that’s made to be the trophy wife or something like that. That she should find someone who can connect and click with her. Be her true soulmate.

Natasha is heartbroken and wants to fix things. Not expecting this at all. Pleading for a second chance but reader stands her ground. No tears shed, but she’s not cold to her either. Reader leaves, Natasha follows her all the way to the airport, tries one last time but reader doesn’t give in….she bids the redhead farewell…and thanks her for the memories that were amazing. She wishes nothing but happiness for her and a happy life.

…that’s it. Write it, toss it away, it’s fine. I’m just going to leave this here, do with it what you want.

Thanks for the fics you made, specifically the ones where you portrayed reader as the knight in shining armor.

Signing off.

A Final Goodbye

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Masc! Reader

Summary: You take a step back and do what is best for you, and Natasha. 

Angst, Comfort

Warnings: None, if I missed any, please let me know | 1.1K

AC: Thank you for sending this in, I am sorry to hear that you’re leave and I do hope that you’re still around to read this. I do apologise for it taking me a while to get it out, I also just want to say that I do not consider myself a masc lesbian so I do apologise in advance if anything in this is not giving that representation. Rest assured, this is Reader being the lead in this. I hope you enjoy x

You took a deep breath as you zipped up the last duffel bag, feeling the weight of your decision settle across your shoulders. Your small apartment almost empty, leaving most of your belongings in storage. Carefully, you placed the duffle bag with the others before taking a moment to gather your thoughts. 

It had been playing on your mind for a while now, keeping you up at night while you tossed and turned endlessly, wishing things were different but too much had changed over time. You tried to spend time with her, but you only met with rain checks or last-minute cancellations. You missed her but you couldn’t stop thinking about the drift between you two. 

Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, the woman you fell for. At first, things were great, you both were on the same page and were very much in the ‘honeymoon’ phase almost every day but like all couples, there were things that you would argue about and there were plenty of things that made you both frustrated. One thing you couldn’t understand was why Nat would consistently treat you like a frail and need to be protected girlfriend. As much as you loved that she cared for you, you hated being treated like a pillow princess. It wasn’t you. 

You didn’t need saving; you didn’t need protecting. You needed somebody who understood you and loved you for you. You always made it clear to Natasha that the pillow princess type wasn’t you at all, you always reminded her that you didn’t need her to protect you from every little thing, after all, you were a soldier. But something about being firm with her just didn’t stick. So, you made the decision to re-enlist for another deployment, making sure that the next time you returned, things would be different. Not just for you but for Natasha as well. 

Natasha knocked softly on the door; it was time. You took a deep breath and reached for the door handle, meeting her soft green eyes for the first time in weeks. Her famous red locks still damp from the rain outside, her expression a mix of relief and uncertainty. 

“Hey,” she said softly, her eyes locking with yours. 

You couldn’t help the soft smile that pulled on your lips, “Hey, I’m glad you could come” you replied, opening the door wider for her. 

 “I’m so glad you’re still here. I… I thought you might be gone already.” She said softly, her eyes darting to the small pile of duffle bags. 

“I leave tomorrow” you replied, watching as Nat turned around to face you once more. “Can we talk, please?” She asked, her gaze locked onto you. “I want to give you time to talk but I really need you to listen to me first” you said as you gestured that the two of you take a seat. Natasha let out a soft sigh, deep down she knew she wasn’t leaving your apartment the same woman she came as. 

The two of you took a seat at the dining table, the cold surface somehow bringing a little comfort to you in this moment as you gently reached for Natasha’s hand. You looked into her eyes for a moment, taking in the beauty she held. 

“I love you so much, I always will but I need to honest with you, with us. This isn’t so much about the fact our schedules suck and the rain check are rain check. This is about us and how I’m not the person you want” you paused for a moment, taking a deep breath in before continuing. “We’ve become different people. We’re pursuing different things and different dreams. I can’t be the partner you expect of me. I’m tired of you only seeing me as this fragile person who needs to protect. I’m a soldier, I’m in the air force. I can hold my own and I want to be respected for that” you added. 

“Detka, I do respect you. You’re everything to me, I don’t mean to make you feel like that….I just, I care about you so, so much but I can’t deal with the thought if something were to happen to you” Natasha pleaded, tears pooling in her eyes.

You smiled softly, trying to keep your own tears from building up, “I know you respect me Nat, but, when you’re around others, you’re not the same. We go from being one to two different people and somehow, you think I’m the one who needs to protected and treated differently….” You paused for a moment, your thumb stroking her soft skin. “We both know that love is such a big, beautiful and powerful thing. It means a lot of things and one of those things is knowing when to let go. You deserve somebody who can give you everything you want, but we know deep down it’s not me” you added. 

A silence fell between you both, Natasha’s face falling, her defenses crumbling as you continued. “I want you to find happiness, even if that means without me. You deserve it.”

“But… what if we can work it out? I can be better, I promise” Natasha said, pleading, her voice breaking as her tears began to fall freely down her cheeks. 

“I’m sorry Nat, but it’s too late. I need a fresh start, and I think you need one too”

Natasha’s expression shifted from desperation to heartbreak as she nodded at your words. Wiping her tears on the sleeve of her shirt, she stood up. “I don’t want to hold you back” she said softly, barely able to look into your eyes. You stood up from your seat, swallowing the lump in your throat as she reached out to hug you one last time. 

“Please be safe” she whispered, “and write to me whenever you’re ready” she added, hugging you tightly. You hugged her back, allowing yourself to feel the love she has for you one last time, hugging her just as tightly back. “I promise” you replied in the same soft whisper. 

As you two parted, you smiled softly at her, hoping it would somehow ease her broken heart a little. “I know this wasn’t what you expected but I want you to know that all the memories we share and the time we had, it was beautiful, and I will forever cherish them. I want nothing but love and happiness for you, don’t hold yourself back from find another love. Be happy Nat, you deserve that” you said.

To your surprise the redhead returned a soft smile, “I will always love you” she spoke ever so gently. 

“And I will always love you” you replied. 

Natasha turned, and headed for the door. You watched her leave, closing the door gently behind her, taking with her a piece of your heart. You took a moment for yourself, part of you broken from the words shared but the other half excited knowing a new chapter awaited. The memories of Natasha would always be with you, reminding you that love can be found again.

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[milirii]

Blind Channel advent calendar

Day 17: „The Story of Wolffie and Verttie“

„You wrote me a story as an advent calendar gift. That is so cute“ Niko cooed at his boyfriend when he had just opened the 17th box from their couple advent calendar. It was their first time trying this tradition, and so far both of them liked it, even though Niko would never tell anyone about the gift Joonas had come up with on the 9th of December. It was hot not gonna lie there, but how did he… well never mind.

„Yes I did. And now give it to me so I can read the story to you. And hands to yourself mister“ Joonas playfully warned Niko, knowing his boyfriends mischievousness.

„Storytime“ Niko cheered handing the paper to Joonas and getting himself comfortable on their bed.

When Niko seemed to be ready Joonas began with his story…

„Once upon a time there was a little wolf. The cutest and littlest of them all. But sadly he was afraid of the big world he lived in, and of all the other creatures surrounding him. One day in this big and scary place that is called school he met his knight in a shining armor though. A fearless and sometimes also a little hyper robot.“

„I wasn’t that small Joonas! Also why did I get described as cute, little and scared easily while you described yourself as hyper and fearless?“ Niko chimed in, interrupting the story.

„Because it is true sweetheart! Now do you want to hear the rest of the story or not?“  Joonas asked Niko with a teasing tone in his voice.

„Yes I do…But can we maybe get Wolffie and Vertti? It is their story too I think“ Niko replied pointing at the worn out wolf plushie and the toy robot on the shelf.

„Of course we can“ Joonas quickly agreed, getting up to get them from the shelf. „But no more interrupting now please“ he said when he returned with the two of them.

Instead of answering Niko just nodded and pretended to lock up his mouth with an imaginary key.

„Okay so let’s continue…The little wolf and the robot grew close very quickly and had many adventures together. The robot was happy to see his wolf friend bloom slowly and open up to the scary world with the help of him. And the robot was also happy to have someone at his side who seemed to understand him better than he did himself. They were together through everything, through the good and the bad. They also found four other…well let’s say unique creatures that made their friendship circle complete, and together the six of them began living their dream. But with time the robot and the wolf both realized that their friendship was not enough for them, that there was more than that between them. This time it was not the fearless robot taking the first step though, because losing his wolf was his biggest fear. He knew he could never live without his wolf by his side so he would have stayed quiet about this forever. But it turned out his wolf was actually the bravest of the two all along, because he took the step and told the robot about his feelings. And here they are now, many years later, still side by side, still living their dreams together and loving each other more than anything.“ Joonas broke of, took a big breath and than continued with a nervous voice now...

„This isn’t the end of their story though. A few months ago the robot realized he wants more with the wolf. That he wants everything with him actually. And that is why he is about to take the next step now…“ With that Joonas looked up from the paper he was holding, and at Niko with a mix of love and fear shown on his face.

„My wolf do you want to marry me?“

- 🦋 wearing a santa hat

I really loved that little emoji drabble with Wolffie and Verttie, so I decided to try and make an advent calendar story out of it for you. It was way better in my head though... I hope you still like it. If not let me know so I can write you another one

OH MY GOD!!! If you guys are hearing a distand sobbing, don't worry, that is just me, reading my advent calendar story! 😭 (I GOT ADVENT CALENDAR STORY? I was not expecting to get one 😭❤️❤️)

This is the most perfect thing?! 🥺❤️ Look at them being cute and happy and in love! My heart is about to burst, this has everything I want from a story 😭 Thank you, thank you, thank you!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[dreamofjoys]

— 𝙇𝘼𝙔𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙀𝙂𝙂𝙎

Synopsis: Neuvillette has finally decided to lay his eggs in your womb

C/W: Oviposition, egg laying(5), afab, established relationship, a little bit of domestic moments, double d's cause why not, double penetration, mention of pain, belly bulging, cockwarming

A/N: Dragon people are into oviposition... i just know...

DO NOT READ / DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH SUCH CONTENT! I WILL BLOCK YOU IF YOU MAKE ANY NEGATIVE COMMENTS (esp when I already stated the warnings) minors go away please.

NEUVILLETTE was gentle when he spread your sticky thighs apart, allowing his shaft to easily re-enter your sex again due to the lubrication of your fluids. He had spent hours stretching your hole out with his fingers and cocks, resulting to you constantly cumming and making a mess all over him.

The hydro dragon doesn't seem to mind. Instead, he pushes your back to the bed, positioning you in a missionary position while he fucks you with both of his dicks. "Sh-shit agh Neuvi, fe-feels so good!" Your eyes rolled to the back when his dicks hits onto your cervix with dead accuracy, his balls slapping onto your folds providing extra stimulation, making you cum once again.

Your husband eyes on your fluttering pussy hole before slowly pulling out, to test if there is any friction. His face turns into a deep shade of red when the erotic sound of sqwueesh happens. Your walls suddenly clamp down on him, seemingly not wanting him to leave your sex. "Love, I think you are ready." Neuvillette comments, looking back at you who seems to be babbling incoherant nonsense, too fucked out and disorientated to register what was going on.

Neuvillette re-positions you again. Your back was pressed onto his front, your legs spread wide with his own as he slots both of himself back in ease, sighing when your walls start fluttering around him again. You moaned in delight when your pussy feels full again, throwing your head back onto your husband's shoulders, hazy eyes looking up at him.

"Will it hurt when you push the eggs in?" So you still remember the agenda of today's sex. " A little, but I will make it fast. Just 5 eggs, tell me if it's too much."

"Hehe, if my husband wants me to take in more than that, I will gladly do so!"

"Don't be ridiculous," Neuvillete leans down to give you a peck on the cheek, his silver hair falls down at his action, tickling your naked body. "There is a limit to your mortal body. I won't hurt you just for my own primal desires." "But you just said that it will hurt a little when the eggs enter me though?"

"I want to start a family with you." He rest his forehead on yours, ocean blue eyes staring down at you. "If you want to back out now, I am also okay with it. I would never want to do something that you are not comfortable with." Your heart skip a beat at his words. This was the very man that you have married to. A kind and gentle soul that was willing to deny his own happiness just for yours.

"Is okay, I told you before that I wanted this. So please, do as you wish, make both of us parents." Upon hearing your words, all the blood in Neuvillette's body seems to have rushed to both of his cocks. His pale lips came crashing down on yours, hungrily devouring you. You gasped when he pinches on your harden nipple, his tongue taking this golden opportunity to slip inside your mouth, exploring every inch of it.

Your eyes widened in surprise when you felt the tip of his cock enlarging, your walls expanding to accommodate the size as something big and round slips into your womb. It seems like one of his cock was responsible for pushing the egg in while the other was just there to keep you nicely stretched. You pulled away from Neuvillette, a string of saliva attached to both of your lips, whimpering when you felt another egg entering your womb.

This whole process was testing the limits of your vagina. You start tearing up at the constant stretching of your walls, instinctively wanting to close your legs but a hand was immediately placed at the back of your thighs, stopping you from doing it.

"It will hurt more if you close your legs." Neuvillette whispers into your ear, his other hand snacking down to toy with your clit, trying to divert attention away from the pain. Your tear stained face breaks Neuvillette's heart, but he could only whisper sweet little nothings to you, telling you that he is so lucky so marry someone as beautiful as you, praising you for being able to take both of his cocks so well. You gripped onto his hand that was toying on your clit, body shaking when you felt the last egg being pushed into your womb, settling itself in it like it was meant to be there.

You look down to see a big bulge on your belly. The eggs were finally nestled inside your womb, safe from the outside. "Mhmmm... is it over?" You rub your eyes sleepily, suddenly feeling exhausted.

"Yes it is, love." Neuvillette's hand had switched to rubbing your folds up and down. He hums an old lullaby, the vibration of his chest lulls your tired state into sleep. Your husband position himself to lean onto the headboard while you sleep in his arms. His dicks were still inside you, not wanting to pull out as he did not want the eggs to slip out - or it could be just an excuse to do cockwarming.

His hand rubs your belly, feeling satisfied at his eggs being laid inside your womb.

Neuvillette thinks hard about what he can do to relieve you of your pain when you have to lay the eggs next time, especially since it's going to grow in size inside your belly.

[normansnt]

The Prince

(Alastor x prince of hell!reader)

"HOLLLLYYY FUCKING SHIT (Y/N) (Y/N) (Y/N) GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER WE ARE VISITING CHARLIEEEE" yelled your dad while bursting into your room.

You looked up at your dad startled.

"Thats great, but why are you yelling?" You asked while raising your eyebrow.

"BECAUSE WE ARE GOING NOW COME OOONNN" he continued yelling while taking your hand and dragging you out of your room and off you guys were to the Hazbin Hotel.

When you arrived your dad almost run in before you told him to tone it down he is still the king of hell who has to keep up a certain image.

This was your relationship in a nutshell. You were not at all like your father and older sister. You were calm and collected and were there to calm them down. And why you stuck with your dad? Because he was broken after your mother left and you kind of got stuck being his mental support.

You never blamed Charlie for leaving you had the chance you do that as well but you decided to stay.

Your dad entered the hotel and immediately hugged Charlie. You just calmly walked in after him.

"OOOHHHHHH YOU BROUGHT (Y/N)" yelled Charlie as well excitedly and gave you the same bone crushing hug your dad gave her earlier.

"Yeah...'m here...sis....cant...breathe" you tried to get a sentence out.

"OH yeah of course sorry"

"Its fine Im happy to see you Charlie" you smiled at her while dusting your button up shirt.

After this encounter Charlie introduced you to the rest of the residents including her girlfriend, who you were delighted to meat since Charlie always rented about her when you guys would talk.

But of course your dad managed to make that encounter awkward as well to which you just sighed a little.

Unbeknownst to you a certain radio demon had his eyes on you from the moment you entered. It was one thing that your attire was something he himself would wear and it suited your figure perfectly, quite old fashioned just like he liked it, but when he saw that seemingly you were the distinguished one in the family you have won his interest.

The way you held yourself with a straight back chin up, truly befitting a prince. He noticed that you seem to either calm down or hint to your father on how to act. It was a sight to behold for sure.

"And this here-" started Charlie nearing the stairs where Alastor appeared. "-oh, this is Alastor our beloved building manager"

"Its a pleasure to meet you sir quite the pleasure" said Alastor while shaking Lucifers hand and wiping it in his coat after.

Not paying a second more of his attention on your father he looked immediately to you.

"And this magnificent creature is the prince of hell himself I'm sure" he said while taking your hand and softly kissing your knuckles.

Your face got a bit read while he straightened back up eye contact never leaving.

"I am, it is a pleasure to meet you sir, I quite enjoy your radio podcast" you managed to get out after re-gaining your composure.

What you said was true, though. You enjoyed his brodcast, his voice, and interestingly enough your taste in music was similar, the jazz part at least.

Alastors eyes lit up at that.

"Indeed? Well I'm honored the prince of hell himself enjoys what I do, and please do call me Alastor." he smiled at you and took one of your hands in both of his while you guys just stared at each other.

"Should we do something ooor...?" Whispered angel to Husk.

However the cat was to stunned to speak. He has never seen Alastor act like this with anyone before. The radio demon was literally flirting with the prince of hell.

"WOOOOWWW ooookkkkk nononono lemme just...squeeze in here" said your father while standing between you and Alastor which was almost impossible thats how close you two stood to each other but he managed.

"If you don't mind I believe my daughter was about to show us the hotel so see ya later" said your dad hastily while pushing you away from the overlord.

"Oh, no, we built the hotel together we should show it together, right Charlie?" Grinned Alastor at the princesse

"...Ok"

"I wouldn't mind at all to show the lovely little prince around" he smiled at you and offered you his arm which you gladly took.

All this while Lucifer was glaring daggers at Alastors back as you two walked off chatting happily.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WOOOOOOWWWW LOOK AT ME POSTING AGAIN YEAAHHHHH WHAT CAN I SAY I HAVE A PROBLEM

And you bitches too I literally uploaded my Hazbin Hotel posts minutes ago and yall are eating it up already.

I mean ofc thank you sm for all the love (🥹🧡) but DAMN yall good? Anyone need a therapist?

Haha, just kidding...we all do.

ANYWAAAYSSS

I HAVE SOOO MANY MORE IDEAS AND I CANT WAIT TO WRITE THEM AND SHARE THEM WITH YOU GUYS.

I'm also thinking about writing a pt.2 for this so lemme know if yall would be interested😎

I hope you enjoyed your reading ladies, gentleman and others, good afternoon good evening and goodnight🧡🦖

[januaryrabbit]

seventeen with a tall s/o who flusters them!! (๑>◡<๑)

pairing: svt x gn!reader

word count: 1.7k

warnings: mild cursing because i can’t be normal

other disclaimers/notes: author teasing/poking fun at svt LOL, barely proof read because i am sleepy and its 2am

a/n: hi everyone, I'M FINALLY BACK WITH ANOTHER POST lmao~ hope you all enjoy and THANK YOU MY TALL 😈 ANON HANNIE STAN FOR REQUESTING!! <3 i have more things in the works that i want to post soon, some svt, ateez and nct dream~ pls stay tuned, but for now enjoy!!!

✩‧₊˚seungcheol: SULK!!!!!!!!!!y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he will still try to protect you He Does Not Care. every time you get flirty with him he just starts pouting like “why are you treating me like this im a grown man…” kinda thing. he will literally try to reach things for you even though he can’t like he’s actively trying to beat you to the punch constantly LMAO!!!! he back hugs you a lot, and you just stand there awkwardly like “pls let me hug you, arent you uncomfortable with your face against my back???” and hes like “No im perfectly fine like this, i just want to give my s/o a hug thanks.” and hes like SO serious. it is actually is kinda uncomfy for his neck tho so after a while he gives in and lets you hug him LOL, but he;s not happy about it >___> (he is!)

✩‧₊˚jeonghan: this man lies for fun………..he messes with people like it’s his JOB…………so when his tall s/o flusters him he tries his BEST to just try to do it back. HOWEVER unbeknownst to you, jeonghan his having a fucking existential crisis over this in his mind. every time you tease him, it sends him into a spiral, questioning his entire god damn life. jeonghan literally lays down in bed one day after hanging out with you and he’s like “this feeling…………what is it……………………my face……..why is it WARM……………” he will literally google (in incognito mode. can’t have the bros seeing this after all) “what does it mean when you feel shy-embarrassed-butterflies in your stomach” because he this feeling is FOREIGN to him!!!!! once he realizes that this is what it means to be flustered he’s just like “oh my god. who have i BECOME!!!!!!!!!!!” and then his eyes widen. “am i the babygirl??????”

✩‧₊˚joshua: i feel like if it’s applicable to the situation, joshua is going to do everything in his power to try to repeat the gesture back to you to fluster you back. i swear to god joshua makes your relationship the Flustering Olympics. he will try to outdo you at any turn. one time you ruffled his hair and he was like You know what. and then he reached up to ruffle YOUR hair!!!! you kiss his cheek, he’ll reach back up to give you one too. he refuses to be the only one who’s constantly feeling shy and mushy - it’s gross and not fair. 

 ✩‧₊˚jun: he is STRUGGLING…..like. i feel like he’s oblivious to your teasing at first, like why are they always reaching to get stuff for me….what’s up with all the headpats??? do they think I’M ACTUALLY A CAT?????? i feel like jun would just straight up ask you that unprompted. like “y/n we need to talk, why do you keep petting me and pinching my cheeks, do you think im a real cat we need to get you checked out grandma.” and youre literally like WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT LIKE ACTUALLY, I JUST THINK YOU[RE CUTE AND SMALL………..anyway he gets real embarrassed after you say that and just accepts the babygirl title that has been thrust upon him

✩‧₊˚hoshi: he is the babygirl of seventeen so he is absolutely RELISHING in this. he will let you do whatever you want with him and he even plays into it too like tbh i think hoshi likes being taken care of even though hes part of hyung line and the performance leader :3 bro is giggling every time you lean down to pinch his cheeks or use his head as an arm rest lmao. this is his world and you’re just in it !!! always asks you to take pics of him when you;re out doing things together, and always gives you picture credit in his captions lol. is the type to drunk text you asking you to pick him up and drive him home from drinking with the boys, and is super clingy to you as you both say your goodbyes to everyone. yeah if you treat him as such, this guy will become a domestic baby girl for you LMFAO

✩‧₊˚wonwoo: quietly flustered at all times. this guy unironically does NOT know how to fcking react when you tease him like this….he’s seriously the type to be like “y/n stop this is seriously bad for my heart wtf” like one time you leaned down and kissed his cheek and he just froze. he was convinced that for a min he was Actually Not Breathing. he’s the type who’s always like ahhh why are they so cute… whenever you tease him…he’s literally so down bad for you!!! btw every time you ruffle his hair or make it known in some way that he’s smaller than you he will without fail crinkle his nose in embarrassment and shyness lol

✩‧₊˚woozi: angry cat vibes from this man. i have a feeling you two would have a tom/jerry type relationship where woozi WILL NOT tolerate you patting his head, bending down to his eye level, and ruffling his hair. he is a grown man. he might need your help to reach some groceries, but YOU’RE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT and HE WOULD HAVE GOTTEN IT OFF THE SHELF IF HE COULD. i feel like woozi may be one of the only members who would have to ask you to tone it down maybe and not tease him as much LOL. of course he appreciates you and likes affection, but i just think woozi would be like -___- i can take care of myself y/n -__- i can also take care of U y/n -___- let me take care of us -____-

✩‧₊˚minghao: a warmhearted man who just genuinely appreciates the gestures you display for him. sometimes will ask you to reach things for him first just because he knows you’ll do it and it just makes him feel cared for. doesn’t really get flustered per se, but i think he his heart would melt every time you show him any kind of affection :) i think he’s the type to appreciate his partner taking the initiative an equal amount in the relationship, so i think he’d be pretty happy w you doting on him a bit lol. he doesn;t realize your intention is to fluster him at all and you end up never telling him because the look of love he has when you pinch his cheeks is worth anything

✩‧₊˚dk: he’s literally svt #1 dude kisser like HE’S usually the one causing people to blush,,,,,......if someone behaved that way toward him, i think he would die because i don;t think dk 100% understands how easily he catches people off guard with his physical affection!!! so like when it happens to him he’s just like OH MY GOD IS THIS HOW WOOZI FELT WHEN I KISSED HIM………….i feel like if you bent down to kiss his cheek suddenly he would become quiet af and suddenly can’t look you in the eyes LMAO like YOU KILLED HIM!! HE’S DEAD!!! btw he reacts this way every single time 

✩‧₊˚mingyu: mingyu is puzzled. he wasn’t aware that these emotions were ones he would ever experience. he recalls seungkwan scolding him in the past for purposely doing things to fluster girls (i.e. flexing his muscles to people at the gym, flashing his smiles at baristas when theyre getting coffee, etc), and he never understood why seungkwan always told him to stop behaving like that until he started dating you. being constantly doted on like his was literally killing him…he;s never been on the receiving end of playful teasing like this before, and he;s literally so shy that he doesn’t know what to do with himself!!

✩‧₊˚seungkwan: he is crisis….he wakes up everyday looking in the mirror and is like “you will NOT get flustered today. you WILL be normal, and unphased, even if they kiss your forehead.” and everyday he fails himself. every time you hand him a mug from the top shelf, every time you slink an arm around him, every back hug you give him, he can’t help how warm his face gets - it’s actually kind of annoying how much of an affect you have him. one time he was thinking about the sudden cheek kiss you gave him before work while pouring himself a glass of water and it literally began to overflow. seungkwan remembers that day as a particular sickening reaction to your tomfoolery….

✩‧₊˚vernon: lmao i feel like the first time you like give vernon a headpat in his mind he’s just like “oh shit why am i getting nervous, i didn;t know i was into this lmao” dfjsdklfjsd. like every time you fluster him hes just pleasantly surprised and goes along with it because he kinda likes being the one taken care of. i’d say that he gets flustered most of the time you try to get a reaction out of him, but sometimes when his tolerance is particularly high, he’s able to flirt back to fluster you too. i think the longer you two have been together, the easier it is to throw back that behavior at you LOL. i feel like you both are always teasing each other and laughing all the time ~___~

✩‧₊˚dino: a BABY GIRL WHO WON’T ADMIT IT!!! bro talks a big talk to his friends about how he isn’t a kid anymore and how he’s a grown man now and yayayayayyayaya. but the moment you headpat him, he’s reduced to a blushy mess. i think if you reached down to boop his nose, he would literally Die on Impact. like. he really thinks he’s normal and the more dominant one in the relationship but lean down to make eye contact with him or rest your head on top of his and he will fucking pass away. after the initial resistance, i think hes someone else who would relish in being babygirl, but only in private!!!! there are things his hyungs do NOT need to know…………………..

[toointojoelmiller]

Have you ever consumed so many devastating TLOU fics that you your heart was at risk of being permanently broken? Does the thought of Part 2 being filmed right now and our collective timeline inching closer to *that scene* airing on HBO with Pedro and Bella make your palms sweat? Same!

My prescription for you is to read today's spotlight stories and remember that, actually, we can stop torturing these two at any time we'd like. (Personally, I won't, but reading Joel and Ellie father-daughter fluff once in a while is good for general mental health.) I'm always reading and writing angst and @becomethesun's fics always feel like a breath of fresh air - and, of course, makes me even more heartbroken at all of the what-could-and-should-have-beens that TLOU I promised and TLOU II used to torment us. She is currently writing a Sam and Henry live AU (Collaborators) that is an answer to my prayers. The two stories linked here are favourites of mine:

true blue by @becomethesun 18,505 words || 5 chapters featuring: family fluff, Ellie adapting to life in jackson, good dad Joel Miller, Ellie gets to be a kid

me and my dog (and an impossible view) by @becomethesun 6055 words || one shot featuring: family fluff, good dad Joel Miller, Ellie gets a dog

from @march-flowerr: "If I had to pick one fic only to re read for the

rest of my life, becomethesun’s “true blue is (it feels good to be known so well)” would probably be it. I’m hard pressed to think of a story that I hold dearer than this - five chapters, short but flush with all the small details and nuances of life in Jackson that we don’t get to see in the game. “True Blue” offers such a sweet catharsis while still holding to canon. Becomethesun gives us these compact, bright glimpses into Ellie’s daily life in Jackson: we get to see her goofing off with Dina and Cat, learning to relax into her relationship with Joel, finding her footing in her new family and community. It paints such a tender and clear picture of Ellie as a girl - not Ellie, the ex Fedra cadet, or Ellie the cure - but Ellie as a kid, with friends and questions and ambition and insecurities and a love for her little world so big that it is breathtaking.

In “me and my dog (and an impossible view)”, we’re introduced to Strelka, Ellie’s dog. She finds her as a puppy in an abandoned book store and brings her home to Jackson. Strelka sees her through her through her first rough days of school, sick days and snow days. I don’t really think much more needs to be said about this fic to illustrate just why it’s so good - Ellie gets a cute little dog that makes her happy. What more do you want, people??"

Re-reading these fics feel like coming home. There’s a lyrical cadence to becomethesun's words that I am drawn continuously to. I love the feel of her fics: the syrupy sweet way the story wends itself through from beginning to end, the way that all these intense emotions and elements are whittled down into simple, intimate moments, like making paper crowns with a friend or curling up with your dog after a long day. The real beauty of these fics is the way that becomethesun has chosen to take the small things - the mundane, the day by day - and has chosen to let them shine. To remind us that amidst real horrors - and let’s be real, TLOU has a lot of those - there is still good to be had, that the little things that make up a life well lived - the things we take for granted - are the most important things. That even when it feels like your world is ending, you can still sit on a porch with your family and feel safe. That at the end of the hardest days, you can always come home."

If you read and love this, please please show the author some love and leave a kudos / comment!! Happy fandoming y'all.

Joel Miller isn't dead if we keep him alive y'all.

[gremlin-girly]

Kinktober 16

Kink: Role play (Doctor + patient)

Pairing: Dean Winchester x f!Reader

warnings: SMUT, roleplay (doctor and patient), fingering (f receiving), oral (f receiving), dirty talk, would 10000% be medical malpractice, improper use of a stethoscope, established relationship, 20000% cheesy, laughing during sex (not in a kinky or mean way just bc Dean almost ruins the moment haha), not beta'd

summary: You and Dean introduce roleplay to the bedroom to try out one of his fantasies. Dr Sexy is in the house

word count: tba

As always I do not give permission for my work to be reposted, translated or copied. My warnings are non-exhaustive (even though I do try to capture everything) but please read at your own risk. I am not responsible for your content consumption.

I hope you enjoy; comments, likes and reblogs are always welcome!

A/N: I am SO sorry ... not really, happy Kinktober! Just a quick one :) - Love, Grem x

Prev | Next | Masterlist

You were worried you wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face when your boyfriend walked in with the doctor coat on and a stethoscope around his neck but, you managed it. It wasn’t until he announced himself as Dr.Sexy, that you bit back a smile and luckily,  Dean was too deep into character to notice.

He was shirtless underneath but unfortunately the coat was buttoned. For now.

“What can I help you with today?” Dean’s tone is low as his eyes rake your form, sat diligently on one of the dining chairs you had snagged from the common room earlier that day. You had worn a low cut shirt and a miniskirt, both of which left very little to the imagination and flaunted the top of your thighs beautifully. You’re not nothing, if not well-prepared.

You cast your eyes up at Dean, pouting slightly. “Well, doc, you see I’m having trouble with cumming.”

Dean, or Dr. Sexy, immediately tenses, watching you bat your eyelashes up at him. He fights desperately not to curse and break character, but shit, the way you look right now has him hard already.

You spread your legs a little wider, miniskirt riding up ever so slightly. Deans breath hitches at the sight of your bare cunt under the miniskirt and his throat is dry.

"Let's see if I can help," he says hoarsely, inching forward. He picks up the end of the stethoscope and presses it to your clit. You yelp at the cold metal on the heat of your clit, but the rush of desire you feel is

Dean slips one finger into your pussy, curling it to reach that sweet, spongy spot that makes your toes curl. You tilt your head back biting back moans when he adds a second finger, stretching you wider over his fingers.

"Fuck, Dean-"

"Doctor," he corrects smugly and your lip twitches.

"Oh, doctor," you mock back. Big mistake.

Dean's thumb brushes your clit sending a wave of pleasure up your spine that makes you moan loudly. Your pussy clenches around his fingers, making Dean hiss as he pumps you with the always present tenacity he has.

But then he removes his fingers entirely, leaving you hollow and panting. You bite back a small whine which turns into a loud curse when Dean sinks to his knees and buries his face into your dripping core without a second thought.

Your hand slips into his hair holding him in place as his warm tongue gently teases your folds before swirling your clit. You move your legs to rest on his shoulders, watching him eat you out like he hadn't eaten for days. His green eyes meet yours from where he sits and you can feel a smug grin form against your heated, wet skin.

"Trying out a different prescription," He teases. Your mind falters and you frown, about to hit him with a comeback, but Dean goes right back to sucking at your clit. You heave breaths, the sounds your both making turning you on even more. When Dean re-adds his fingers you half scream in ecstasy.

"Dammit, you're so tight." He murmurs, taking another long languid lick.

"Dean," you huff impatiently, your eyes pleading.

Dean pulls away from you, face covered in spit and cum, grinning ear to ear. "Maybe you need some vitamin D instead."

You grimace and kick feebly at him, biting back a grin of your own. "Shut up."

Dean chuckles, eyes twinkling up at you from between your legs. He presses a soft kiss inside your thigh before standing up to unzip his pants.

"Okay, okay. Less talking, more action. Noted."

[matthewswifeyx]

Laundry surprise

I had woken up out of my cozy slumber. I turned over and saw the curtains fluttering slowly. I didn't even realise Matt was staring at me. Smiling, admiring.

"Good morning beautiful." He mumbled.

"Morning."

I snuggled into Matt's chest and he wrapped his arms around me. Last night was wonderful. It was our first attempt at trying for a baby. It couldn't have been better. Matt had organised a whole day for us. Ever since I spoke to him about having kids he has been so eager to start trying.

Yesterday Matt had made breakfast for the both of us, he made my favourite a bacon sandwich with an egg on top. He told me that we would be going for a walk in our local park and come back to get ready to go to a restaurant. Then after the restaurant, we came back home we had a very romantic night together.

"How are you feeling?"

"Perfect. I really loved yesterday."

"I did as well. I loved it so much."

We both lay in a comfortable silence facing one another. Matt couldn't stop admiring me. Who knew he would act like this the morning after?

"What?" I laugh.

"Nothing. You're just beautiful." He leaned in and kissed me passionately.

For the rest of the day, we stayed indoors, in bed and watching our favourite movies.

TIME SKIP

It had been a few weeks since that day and I was home on my own. Matt was out with his brothers. I suddenly remembered that my period was due sometime soon. So I went to have a look at my tracker.

9 days late it read. I couldn't believe it. I wasted no time walking, practically sprinting, towards the nearest drug store. I bought three pregnancy tests. I headed back home and went straight to the fridge to make myself a big cup of water.

A few minutes I was sitting in the bathroom waiting for the urge to pee. When I did I prepared the pregnancy sticks and used them. When i finished with all three tests I read the instructions to wait 15 minutes. To keep my mind elsewhere I decided to do some quick household chores then check the tests.

The timer goes off on my phone. My heart flutters. I really want it to be positive. I said a quick prayer to myself before I re-entered the bathroom. I flipped over the first test. Positive. I can't believe it. I flip over the second test. Positive. I gasp. I then reach for the final test and flip it over once more. Positive.

My eyes start to fill with tears of happiness. I can't comprehend any words to express my feeling right now. God, Matt will be over the moon. I can't wait to tell him. I am so overcome with shock that I didn't realise my hands were shaking slightly. I had to take a minute sitting down to calm myself down with nerves and butterflies. How will I tell Matt?

I stand back up and reach for the tests just to see if I wasn't dreaming. They were still the same. I placed them in the cupboard under the sink. I walk out to the garage and drive to the nearest shopping mall. I get out my car and start walking towards the variety of stores.

After waking for a while, I came across this baby shop. It must be new. Maybe a sign? I go inside and walk around until I am stood in front of the baby clothes. My idea was that I would be doing laundry with Matt, like we always do on Thursdays, and I would put the baby onesie in his folding pile. I found a cute green onesie with an elephant on the front. I though it was cute so I bought it and headed back home.

Matt would be back at 6 pm. Our usual routine was that we would get all of the laundry that needed folding and spread it across our bed, then we would find a movie to watch while folding the clothes. After that we would start a late dinner then eat it in bed and then eventually fall asleep.

TIME SKIP

Everything was set up. I had placed the baby onesie in the clean laundry basket for us to take to our bedroom.

My nerves were interrupted by Matt's keys jingling in the door. I went to the top of the stairs and Matt walked up them to take me into a warm embrace. I let go.

"Come on, this doesn't get you out of laundry night." I half joke. Matt groans.

"Do we have to do that tonight? I'm so tired!"

"No it doesn't!" I laugh. Matt groans again and follows me to the laundry basket to help me pick it up and take to our bedroom.

"What would you like to watch sweetie?"

"As always Matt, I don't mind as long as this laundry gets done."

Matt chooses a movie and gets to work. After about half an hour into the activity. I wondered if the onesie fell out of the pile. I ignored it and I thought that I would worry about it if the laundry gets done without Matt finding it. My thoughts were interrupted with a surprised Matt.

"Babe, did one of your shirts shrink or something?"

"Nope." I try to hide my excitement. "I don't even own any onesies. It looks like it would fit a baby anyway." I say.

"But we don't have a baby." matt was slowly catching on.

"Do we?"

"Do we?" Matt questions. I start grinning. I had the pregnancy tests in my hand behind my back.

"We do." I say and I pull out the tests and show them to Matt.

"Oh my God! Were gonna have a baby?"

"I found out this morning!" I nod and tears fill my eyes for the second time today.

"Oh my fucking god! I love you so much baby! I'm gonna be a dad!" He cheers and takes me into a loving hug. Matt pulls away briefly and kisses me lovingly. Just like he did on that night. He pulls away and I notice Matt's eyes also full with tears urging to drop.

"Oh Matt, it's okay to cry!" I laugh.

I pull him into my chest as he starts to sob.

"I have always dreamed of this Y/N." He mutters. "I love you s much and don't ever let me forget that."

While Matt was saying all of these kind words, a feeling of love and passion filled the room. I knew that Matt had wanted this pregnancy so badly and how much this meant to him and I. I know I made the right decision. I love Matt so much.

Hey guys! I hope you really enjoyed this fanfic! If you have any requests or suggestions then send me a message and I will try to get back to you asap! <3

[wheresmymilliondollarman]

aaron warner x ferrars! reader pt. 4

(continuation from part three)

who knew running a new country was so hard? spoiler alert: apparently everyone but you and your sister. your asylum days never looked so simple.

a/n: hi… i’m back 🔥🔥 i’d like to start by apologizing for the stupid long wait. it was unfair to my readers and i swear i had no intention to leave people waiting. i genuinely forget sometimes people really like my writing </3 and i truly am grateful to the people who read. let’s jus say i have been busy and yet so unmotivated for the littlest things. i won’t bore w the details i’m sure y’all are jus happy i finally posted part 4. again REALLY sorry for the wait and pls enjoy. also now adding borders to my fics (ill edit the old ones too)

word count: 9k

warnings: few plot changes, fights and feuds, violence and blood mention, castle slander, angst, buzzcut aaron 😣😣😣

things were finally looking up for the rebellion. you'd manage to overthrow the supreme commander and his army, the reestablishment no longer ruled over your part of the land - making it open to new possibilities of government.

you never wished you paid attention in your social studies classes until now.

there were so many regulations you had to learn, matters you had to discuss, and, of course, the never-ending paperwork. your least favorite part. it didn't help you were behind on learning the fancy terminology for topics. 'can't people ever just say what they mean?'

juliette's optimism for being a leader was diminishing every time she had to meet with castle on strategy. he poorly disguised his disapproval of leadership upon every encounter.

but you learned to ignore it along the way. it wasn't as if he was ever the perfect leader either, plus you'd get the gist of the whole leadership thing soon. you silently prayed.

in the midst of all the responsibilities, you had to keep aaron from killing kenji most of the time. they were originally getting on somewhat friendly enough terms, but that was before the incident occurred.

that day, kenji barged in with urgency into your room as you were looking over papers. he went on to say there was a 'serious' problem, and you worriedly assumed it had to do with the reestablishment. but it instead involved your boyfriend.

"seriously kenji? i thought we were under attack or someone died!"

"someone will die if you don't handle your boyfriend right now. hopefully better than you've been handling being supreme comm-" kenji was cut off by the click of a gun.

"i dare you to finish your sentence."

with the barrel to his head, kenji quickly defended his words with the barrel to his head. aaron and him bickered back and forth. kenji turned to you for help, but all you did was shrug and mouth 'karma.' then he hit kenji's head with said gun.

"okay, that's enough, can someone explain to me what the issue is here?"

"this is the issue." aaron then turned to reveal chunks of different sizes along the back of his head. you gasp at his ruined hair.

"oh my god, kenji what the hell did you do?"

"i gave him a trim just like he asked!"

this made another argument burst out between the two. kenji denying his mistake and aaron picking the gun back up and threatening to kill him.

"aaron put the gun down."

aaron reluctantly does so, but his glare at kenji doesn't drop.

"phew, thanks, princess."

"kenjii since you "trimmed" warner's hair, i think it's only fair that he does the same to yours." you proclaim.

kenji looks toward you in horror, "no way!"

aaron wastes no time in going to the bathroom and returning with a razor. he gives him a terrifying smile, "i'm only going to trim the edges."

kenji bolted out of the room a second later, complaining about favoritism on the way out.

aaron ended up having no choice but to shave the rest of his hair, leaving him with a military-style buzz cut. you would mourn the longer hair, but truthfully, it did nothing to tarnish his looks.

sector 45, after sending several invitations, finally received a rvsp for an international leadership conference held at your sector. from oceania, is what delalieu told you and juliette.

you started to come to the realization about the lack of history you knew about warner. sure, you knew him deeply now, but you knew so little about his past. castle made it evident when he mentioned to you and juliette his possible connection to oceania's leaders. castle, annoyingly, did not disclose anymore and insisted aaron needed to be the one to tell. yet, he judged how little you both knew about oceania.

warner being immersed into his work left little time for that. while aaron had been helpful in your learning some etiquettes, he'd been closing off his emotions since he father's death. even after many attempts of trying to get him to open up, he vowed he was okay. you had a slim to none chance of prying information about oceania from him.

you felt lost and angry. for being supreme commanders, you and juliette seemed to be almost always out of the loop. castle regarded you as experiments, seeing how two naive teenage girls could survive being leaders. the rest of the world wasn't any different.

you offered the idea of just reading castle's mind, but juliette thought it could lead to mistrust toward you. she believed you both needed to remain calm for the moment, which is what you have done so far. but you were getting a bit bitter playing nice for so long.

at times you felt juliette left you of the leadership issues. she insisted to be the one to tackle meetings and discussion with castle, she sometimes gave answers before even discussing it with you, and even delalieu seemed to report everything to her first before it got to you. you would never bring it up, and just wrote it off as her still getting the hang of everything. but in the back of your mind you worried it was only a foreshadow.

on the way to see the new headquarters, castle rushed to you. he begged you and juliette to reconsider taking warner with you to greet the guest downstairs. you had no clue what he was on about, but played along and told him warner wasn't needed. you quickly caught on to the situation.

you rushed back to your room, put on what you deemed appropriate clothing and freshened up your hair and face. you were still putting on your shoes when you left.

on the way, you thought about how odd it was juliette didn't even bother to inform you. even if you were busy, you both had pagers to contact one another for important events such as this one.

you hear sounds of greetings as you approach the reception. you luckily hadn't missed out on much.

you see kenji along side juliette and feel a pang of betrayal. juliette was subtly shocked and kenji was confused to see you. but you cover it up with a smile as you turn to see the guest.

"apologies for my delay, i was held up with some prior matters." you hold a hand out, "it's a pleasure to meet you, i'm y/n."

the guest introduces himself as haider, and you can't help but notice a glint of recognition as he looks you over.

but that was forgotten as you came to find out haider wasn't aware of the fact sector 45 had another supreme commander as it wasn't mentioned on the invitation. you told him it must've been a mistake, but you threw a questioning glance to juliette.

you felt yourself get lost as the meeting when on. haider didn’t make it discreet he knew warner very well. he made a brief comment on his relationship with the other supreme commander children.

“i’ve got to say, when i first heard about warner being involved with a girl — i had strong doubts. he has never been the relationship type. unless you count lena. oh, but i’m sure you know all about her by now. they were together for almost two-years after all.”

you had no idea who lena was, but you had a strong sense you wouldn’t like the answer. haider had obviously knew this, and faked ignorance with his comment.

“oh. he hasn’t mentioned his ex-girl friend?”

your heart dropped. you glanced at kenji and juliette from the side of your eyed and they held the same face of surprise. you did your best to remain unphased with a polite smile.

“must’ve just not been important enough to discuss. like right now. i’d prefer if we got back on track of the topic instead of digging into my personal relations.”

if haider was impressed or offended he didn’t show and shifted subjects. you tried your best to listen in as juliette spoke with him about dinner, but the thought of warner having an ex-girlfriend floated around in your mind for the rest of the meeting.

the second haider left the room, and you all burst into a discussion for the next step. dinner would be in less than an hour, and you were still filled in with little to no information about haider and his intentions. you knew the next step would be for you to talk to aaron about it, but you weren’t sure you could be alone with him with this newfound information about his past. you got juliette and kenji to come along with you to question him under the excuse that it would be easier than relaying whatever he told you.

before you three could do that, you didn’t forget their actions before this meeting. you knew it would be the worst time to discuss especially with how limited time was, but you spoke without thinking when you saw juliette heading towards the door.

“why didn’t you tell me about this meeting?”

she sighs and brushes you off saying it wasn’t the most important subject right now. but you already begin, so you thought you might as well get some answers, and pushed her for an explanation.

“we’re suppose to be in this together, how could you leave me in the dark—”

“because i didn’t think you could handle it, and quite frankly, castle agreed with me.”

“what?” you were dumfounded by her response.

“you’ve been so unruly lately, and i get it doing this whole supreme commander thing has been challenging — but i couldn’t afford anything with this meeting.”

“unruly? just because i don’t want to listen to every little thing castle says. news flash, he’s made it quite clear he doesn’t support us leading sector 45.”

“he knows far more than us, we should take what he says wisely.”

“j has a point y/n, castle has a lot of experience—” kenji intercepts.

“shut up! you’re just as guilty as juliette. i thought we were friends and then you help juliette hide this meeting from me!” you spit at kenji.

he stays silent, for once. but it says more than enough for you. you turn your bitterness back to your sister.

“was it his idea to only put down you as the supreme commander on the invitations, too?”

“yes.” she reluctantly admits. “castle wasn’t sure if the idea of two supreme commanders would go well over with orher sectors. i swear, y/n, i only found out once they were already sent.”

you didn’t care for reasoning. you were angry at it all. “i agreed to do this for you! it was you wanted us to do this together! ”

“and maybe i’m starting to regret that.”

your face dropped. juliette’s eyes widened as she realized the weight of her words. but it was too late to apologize.

you scoff, “alright. fine. go ahead and do it yourself. go and question warner about haider yourself and talk to castle and beg for his help for dinner. because i’m done being supreme commander. but it’s not like i ever was, right?”

you can’t help but leave a final comment before you stalk out the door, “you know what’s funny? i found out about the meeting because castle wanted me to tell you to not do it on your own, to bring warner, he said. guess you’re unruly to him too.”

with limited options of locations juliette, kenji, or warner wouldn’t be able to find you, you had to resort to being hiding in your old room you were once held captive in.

now less clouded by anger, you facepalmed yourself. perhaps just quitting being supreme commander had been a rash decision. you weren’t even quite sure if you could just quit like that. but you would rather be jobless than take back your words to juliette.

maybe she was right, you are quite unruly. but you had no plans to admit it to her.

you thought back to aaron. you wanted his comfort, but you still were upset about the ex-girlfriend situation. even if you said it was important, you had somewhat of a right to know when your boyfriend was in a past relationship.

you hated how castle was right about how much you lack knowledge about aaron’s history. and you know you should probably be there with kenji and juliette talking to aaron, but you were too prideful, and a little embarrassed to do so.

so you collected yourself as made your way back to your room (taking twists and turns to avoid anyone you didn’t want to see) to prepare yourself mentally and physically for the dinner to come.

unfortunately for you, aaron was sitting on your bed waiting for your return when you stepped into the room. you we’re unsure on how to greet him since he likely was informed about earlier events through juliette and kenji.

“oh my god, you scared me.”

“my apologies, amor. but i had to see you after you you didn’t arrive with kenji and juliette when they went to ask me about haider.”

you went into your closet as he spoke from your bed, picking out a nice dress for dinner. “got into a fight with them and it didn’t end well. then i dramatically quit being supreme commander.” you explained nonchantly.

he was taken aback, “you quit? just like that?”

“yeah.” you confirm walking out the closet with a lilac dress on arm, “you think this’ll be good enough, or it it too much?”

“you’ll look astonishing as always. but don’t change the topic, what happened to that headstrong nature of yours i admire? you can’t just give up after a silly fight.”

you groan, and toss the dress on tour bef next to him, “i really don’t want to talk about it right now. can’t you just tell me what shoes go with this dress?”

“amor.” aaron stands up and interwines his hands in yours, “please don’t shut me out.”

you bitterness rose back up at his words and you drop aaron’s hands. “that’s ironic coming from you.”

“amor, please don’t pick a fight with me.”

“castle once told me i didn’t know you as well as i thought. and he’s right, aaron. any mention of your past and you close right up.”

aaron sighs, “i’m not an open person, you know this. it’s harder for me to talk about my personal life than it is for you. but i mean it when i say i am trying for you.”

“really? then why didn’t you even bother to mention you knew haider. or how about the fact you have an ex-girlfriend! you know how embarrassing it was for someone from a different continent to tell you more than you knew about your boyfriend?”

“lena?” he asks furrowing his brows. “she was barely a girlfriend. haider likely only mentioned her to rile you up and it’s working, so please calm down.”

“oh my god. there you go again! you want to just sweep it under the rug, and i’m tired of it. all i want is a little more openness from you.”

“i have been open, there’s no one closer to my heart than you. please understand that just certain subject are—“

“hard to talk about, yeah i’ve got that.” you exasperated. “i just think it’s important to mention a two-year relationship.”

“it was purely physical.”

your heart stings. “so, physical relationships just mean nothing to you? everything physical we’ve shared hasn’t meant anything to you?”

“that’s not what i meant. i was different back then!”

you turn around, “just go warner. i’d like to be alone right now before dinner.”

aaron didn’t anything else, he knew your word was final. not because of his sense of your emotions, but by the fact you used his last name.

in less than an hour you managed to fight with every person close to you. and you had to see said people at dinner in less than ten minutes. somehow, you blamed castle for your luck.

delalieu knocked on your door to escort you to dinner. you weren’t sure of aaron had told him to or perhaps he had pity that you would be entering alone. either way you were happy to walk with someone you weren’t upset with.

luckily, you had arrived before the guests did. but unluckily, kenji, juliette, and aaron were already there. your usual spot was next to aaron and infront of juliette, kenji sometimes next to you or her. but juliette sat at the head of the table now, kenji to her right and aaron to her left. you had no choice but to awkwardly sit next to warner due to the limited seating. plus you’d rather not show haider theres issues amongst you four.

kenji and juliete silently conversed, your sister ignored you fully while kenji glimpsed at you with a small frown. you could feel aaron turn in your direction, but your gaze focused on the empty seat next to you.

haider arrived shortly, greeted aaron first with a hug, one aaron was visibly discomforted by. then discreetly spoke, both using arabic tongues. which none of you knew he had. ypu almost choke on nothing as he casually reveals aaron know seven languages. the rest of you greeted him curtly, and he took a seat in front of you.

haider wasn’t the only guest at the dinner, his sister nazeera showing up was a bit of a surprise to the rest of you.

nazeera is gorgeous, with her smooth carmel complexion, dark eyes and strong features. her face held diamonds percing; two on her eyebrow and one below her lip. she wore a wrap that covered her whole hair, and it did nothing to lessen her beauty — it enhanced it.

she stared at juliette before she turned to you. you were unsure of the expression she held, and part of you wanted to just find out yourself, but you knew better.

both you and juliette stood up to greet her, and she accepted politely. she gave aaron a mere nod then proceeded to sit down next to you, instead of her brother. but if anything it gave you more of a reason to not talk to the people beside you.

aaron started the conversation about her scraf, but kenji was the one who made an offhanded comment regarding her head scarf, which you learned was called a hijab, claiming it was banned to wear them since it was stabled with religion. nazeera didn’t shy away from answering, she stood her stance and didn’t care for reestablishment rules despite being a supreme commander’s daughter.

nazeera has a sharp tongue and kenji was not prepared for it. you tried to hide you smile as kenji got more flustered with his words. she was highly more likable than her brother.

“are all the other supreme commander kids like this?” you ask her.

“only the ones who aren’t insufferable.” she stands up from her seat, “so, no,” she tells you with a wink. nazeera then announces her departures and leaves the dining table.

you had a good feeling about her. and even though you and juliette were at odds, you knew she also admired nazeera already.

aaron and kenji bickered a bit before haider bid his goodbyes. aaron took the liberty of escorting him to his quarters. a job that likely should’ve been done by you or juliette, but frankly, you didn’t like the guy much to care.

now juliette, kenji, and you sat in an awkward silence. part of you wanted to mend things with your sister, but majority of you felt she should take the first step. kenji looked ready to say something, but held his tongue.

you figured it was the most you’ll get, so you mumbled a goodbye and headed off to your room.

half way there, you stopped. even if you felt you were the one in the right, you were ready to make the first move if it meant rehashing things with your sister and best friend. you rerouted back to the dining room.

before you could enter, you heard talking. you peeked through the slit of the open door and saw nazeera, juliette, and kenji talking.

suddenly, and ugly feeling boiled in your stomach. seeing them all conversing (mainly juliette and nazeera because kenji was mixing his words) made you realize how perfect the three looked together. almost natural. it made you think of how easy it would be to replace you. nazeera would be the one teasing and messing with kenji. nazeera would be the sister you imagined juliette wished she had instead — one who was confident, witted, and courageous. everything you lacked these days.

maybe they just didn’t need you nearly as much as you needed them.

you couldn’t even place your vexation on nazeera. you just met her today, and she was already someone you knew was amazing as she presented herself.

you never entered the dining room. you left before anyone could notice you dejectedly walking away.

the following morning wasn’t better. delalieu knocked on your just as the sun was starting to rise, your restless sleep did nothing to help wake you up. he informed you you’d been invited to accompany haider, and nazeera would likely be joininng. you nodded, thanked him, and sent him on his way.

as soon as the door closed, you grabbed the nearest pillow and screamed into it. haider was already being a pain, and it was his second day.

worst part was, delalieu failed to mention haider had also invited others.

you were unpleasantly surprised to see all three of the people you quarreled with arriving after you.

you weren’t sure who to walk aside. but on instinct you stood next to aaron before you could remember your vendetta. juliette was on one side of haider and you were on the other. nazeera and kenji followed closely behind.

it was unbearably silent the first few steps, there wasn’t a word uttered. the tension would’ve needed a axe to cut.

you couldn’t help but peek at aaron from the side of your eye. you quickly looked forward when you accidentally made eye contact. he sighed quietly after. you hated how badly you had to clench your fist to prevent yourself from latching it onto his.

haider broke the silence. he asked warner if he would be attending the continental symposium. you and juliette only knew briefly about it. no one ever mentioned the nature of the event to either of you.

but when juliette inferred haider about it, you both realized how big the event was.

“i wasn’t sure whether you’d both attend since the late supreme commander anderson has never attended public gathering.”

“we’ll both very much be there.” you add in quickly.

“of course, we aren’t hiding from the world,” juliette adds in, “when will it be?”

haider’s eye slightly widened as if she asked an incredulous question. but it made sense after he revealed it would be in two days. he innocently answered, but you knew he was satisfied having caught juliette off guard.

“it’s really my fault for that. juliette’s been so diligent with managing all other issues i thought it would be better if i took it off her shoulder’s and handled it. but silly me, i’d forgotten to keep her posted on the date.”

you jumped in with an excuse to defend your sister because even if you two weren’t on good terms, you wouldn’t let someone try to toy with her.

juliette looks to you grateful for the help, and you give her a small smile in return.

aaron added in, “she’s right, we’re finalizing the program with delalieu today, who is hard at work planning the details.”

you give his hand a tight squeeze as a ��thank you’. but as you try to let go, aaron’s hand engulfs your tightly to stop you. you try to wiggle your hand a little, but eventually it it be.

you bite the inside of your cheek to keep you from smiling.

aaron asks haider for his plans during the remainder of his stay. he mentions catching up with old friends then goes on to say juliette and you must’ve received numerous invitations from the other kids of supreme commanders.

“we haven’t gotten the whole group together in far too long,” haider says.

you raise a brow, “whole group? just how many of you are there?”

suddenly everyone stops as haider’s demeanor goes from unauthentic sincerity to ice cold. it almost scares you.

he harshly grabs aaron’s arm,wretching your hands apart, and pulls him forward. haider asks angrily if he’s shared little to nothing about ‘them’ with you.

“you turn your back on us for this — this child? how stupid could you be? you have to know it won’t end well, i promise you that.”

“hey! let go.” you protest.

haider scoffs and ignores you. “i thought it couldn’t be true you’d fallen for a psychotic girl’s insignificant freak sister. i defended you, just to find out it all true. what the hell happened to you?”

you’d had enough shoved him away with your gift, hard enough to cause him to stumble back a little.

haider was stunned by the sudden force then notices the red aura from your hand.

“what did you just do?”

you shrug, “how could a child like me do something? but if you touch him like that again you’ll end up just like the last supreme commander. i promise you that.”

“is that a threat?”

“why don’t you find out?”

haider laughs, almost delighted by the fact you threatened to basically kill him. everyone else unintentionally lets out a breathe they didn’t know they were holding, especially juliette who had been ready to intervene.

haider requested to speak with aaron alone, promising to keep his hands to himself. you and aaron shared a look, and you knew he’d be alright. he gives you a smile that was made for you, and you return it.

the fight from the say before was long forgotten. you knew no matter how many fights you’d have, you’d do almost anything for him.

part of you still hoped for a grand apology, but this would be more than enough. now, you hoped to eventually make amends with the other two.

you walked off, not quite sure the destination. you figured you might as well go on a walk yourself since the planned one got disrupted. but a hand grabbed your arm to stop you.

“hey, uhm,” it’s juliette’s voice, “do you think we could talk? i mean..later because we’re all so busy and obviously you have stuff to do-“

“yeah.” you smile, “i’d like that.”

you both share heartfelt grins. you wave at kenji and nazeera from your spot and walk back toward the base. this time, with a happier kick in your step.

a good few steps in — you felt it, an abrupt change in the environment. it was almost too eerie, and you realized there was no one in sight, not even the guards who are meant to follow you from a generous distance.

you came to the conclusion it was no accident when the first shot punctured your shoulder. the second through your side.

you scream in agony to as you attempt to flee from the open, but more bullets ensue. you manage to block a few with your energy, but the pain was painful enough to leave some to hit your busy, such as your thigh. but the one that made you topple over was a bullet near the chest, in almost the same spot anderson once shot you.

you managed to block it before it was a fatal hit, but it hit you enough to be painful and draw blood.

you were half conscious, the world foggy and blurry in your eyes. you felt someone approach you and kneel down to tower over your defenseless body. a sudden pressure on your neck woke you up enough to understand this person was choking you to kill you.

you used whatever energy you had left to try and push the person off of you. the lack of oxygen and the increase of black spots made it hard for you to focus on pushing the person off.

your adrenaline kicked in to created enough power to get the man off of you. as soon as he groan in pain, you started to feebly crawl away from the perpetuator. your blood likely dragging on the concrete now. but they composed fast, and grabbed onto your ankle. you fid what you could and grabbed the nearest rock and hit them on the head with it. but ir wasn’t enough to stop them from grabbing you again.

at that point you were worn out, too tired to even move a muscle. the loss of blood was starting to make you woozy, and the bullets seemed far more painful than you remembered. you couldn’t register you were on the verge of death.

but the pressure on your neck never returned. instead came the noises of violent punches and broken bones. a new person crouched beside you, you knew they meant you no harm as they assessed your wounds and chanted assuring words.

in your deliriousness, you babbled on about how they looked like your friend kenji, one whom you fought with and missed so much.

“i’m sure your friend misses you too.” kenji responds, doing his best to keep you awake.

you blacked when another person, stronger than the first, carefully carried you and rushed toward the base.

in the medical bay, you were in and out of consciousness. you remember sara and sonya hurriedly tending you, kenji freaking out in the back, and aaron worriedly beside you. your first thought was, ‘where’s juliette?’

unbeknownst to you at the time, juliette was getting her wounds treated as well. she had been shot too, but not nearly as fatal as you. she was caught off guard alone as well, but her attacker only aimed to disable her. nazeera had been near by when she heard the commotion and saved her.

juliette was shot moments before you, and aaron believed it was worked as a distraction so your assailant could successfully kill you.

kenji was the one to find you. after juliette had been injured, he went to find you and arrived in the nick of time.

it took almost two days before you could wake up fully without passing out every minute. the first face you saw was aaron — who was already at your beside, holding your hand tightly — almost like he was praying.

when he noticed you’d woken up, his face became relaxed. he pecked you on the lips before badgering you with questions about your state. you assured him you were alright, and had to repeat it over and over.

your body still ached greatly due to the poison laced in the bullets sara and sonya explained to you. your wounds were healed, but there were still possibility of hallucinations from the poison.

after asking for your sister, sara had informed you of her situation, but quickly told you she was alright after seeing your worried eyes.

the culprits had been caught and sent to the holding cells, but they had refused to cooperate. meaning there was zero information on who was behind both your attacks.

aaron was monitoring you intently, when you sat up he rushed to help. he hadn’t stopped holding onto you since you woke up, as if you’d disappear if he let go. his eyes were red-rimmed, but you didn’t comment on it.

you felt bad for giving him a near-death scare again, and berated yourself for leaving yourself vulnerable. even worse, since your sister had also been hurt. aaron put the blame on himself for leaving you unattended.

no matter what you said, warner seemed distraught. his eyes told you there was more to the issue, he was holding back. as he remembered what the issue was, he grew distant. his grip on your hand loosened.

“is everything okay?”

“as long as you’re okay, amor.” he smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “i have to speak with you about something.”

“about what?”

“not here. let’s get you out of here and cleaned up before we talk.”

you nod. you were more than ready to get out the the med bay. your thoughts went to the coming symposium, with you and juliette being temporarily mia, there was likely a plethora of things still needed to get done.

you were happy to finally get a chance to shower. the grime and blood were now down the drain. once done, you changed and went back into your room where aaron was waiting.

before he could get a word in, you embraced him tightly, and he didn’t hesitate to hold you. after almost dying, you just wanted the comfort of aaron. kenji would call you crazy for putting ‘comfort’ and ‘aaron’ in the same sentence.

you kiss him, after what’s felt like forever. it’s not fiery or rushed, but deliberate and emotional. everything was gone from your surrounding for a moment, it was just the two of you. you felt safe. but then aaron pulled away from you, and held onto your hands.

“amor, i need to tell you something. it’s important.” his eyes are looking at everywhere but you.

“you can tell me anything.” you reassure.

he takes a deep breath, running a hand through his blonde hair. your nerves begin to spike, you’ve never seen aaron so hesitant to speak, he’s almost scared.

“i’ll start from the beginning.”

and he did. he told you the start of the reestablishment, their campaigns, ideals, and plans to take over. then, he shifts to the ‘unnatural’s’ and how after they were discovered, they were exploited by the reestablishment.

aaron tells you about two girls who were willingly given over to the reestablishment to be experimented and tested on. you were getting confused on where the conversation was going.

“aaron, why are you explaining all this?”

“because one of those girls is juliette.”

you didn’t know what to say, you were thrown into a loop you still weren’t fully comprehending.

“i don’t understand..”

“the parents you lived with weren’t your biological ones. y/n, you’re both adopted.”

your reality was warped in a matter of seconds. you never felt connected to your ‘parents’, but finding out you came from a different family?

“w-wait… so the people juliette and i lived with for almost our entire lives aren’t our parents?” aaron nods.

“so where are our biological parents? are they alive? wait… who’s the other girl you mentioned before?”

your head was jumbled up, you were trying to get so many answering at once while still trying to process.

aaron closes his eyes for a second before the green is visible again. “that other girl is juliette’s sister. but it’s not you, amor. you and juliette are not biologically related.”

you were frozen, as if time itself had stopped. you free from aaron’s hands and distance yourself. everything had change.

aaron keeps speaking, saying he only knew of juliette’s real sister and parents and sister until recently. castle was the one who told him the information to put the pieces together. castle was the one who urged him to tell you because the reestablishment was was coming, very soon.

“there was no record of you before you were adopted, i had always assumed it was only juliette adopted. it was only after you came here and i ran your dna, along with juliette’s, did i find yours different from your parents.”

juliette wasn’t actually your sister. the parents and girl you grew up with aren’t related to you at all. everytime you talked to aaron about were grateful for juliette as a sister, he knew the truth the whole time.

it took you five minute of speak again. you didn’t care for the rest at the moment, you still had to have another question of yours answered.

“if juliette’s biological parents work for the reestablishment, where are mine?”

“i swear, i had no idea-“

“please. just tell me.”

the more you heart, the more your heart shatters. to stay and watch over sector 45 while his father left to the capital, anderson had him prove himself. it started with emmaline, juliette’s real sister. he was in charge of her imprisonment and torture. but then his father sent him one more task before he was supreme commander.

anderson transported a man and woman to sector 45, aaron was commanded to get information, by any means, out of them. it went on for a year, until anderson saw no value in keeping them anymore.

his father ordered a public execution, and aaron did as he was told. only when finding a journal of his father just hours before you woke up did he get the identity of those people. your parents.

it was the final straw to send you spiraling. you don’t know if you got on the floor or started yelling first. aaron knelt down next to you, trying to soothe you, but it was only making it worse.

you don’t even feel the tears are running down your face. aaron apologizes over and over saying, no matter how many times you told him to stop. you could only keep saying ‘why?’ over and over.

‘why did you keep this from me?’

‘why didn’t you tell me sooner?’

when aaron tried holding you, you roughly shoved him away. his touch no longer felt loving. instead, it became poisonous.

“don’t touch me.”

“amor, please. i love you, so much.”

“you don’t know how to love anyone. you’re a fucking coward.”

the room was suffocating you. you felt trapped and had to get out of there. you got up and booked it out the door, not stopping when aaron called out your name.

you keeping running and let your legs guide you to your destination. the moment you spotted the white door, you came to a halt.

you barge in with no warning, startling the two people in the room. you take big step toward your target and, without hesitation, you slap castle.

“oh my god— what the hell, y/n!”

kenji’s presence does nothing to stop you, “did you have your kicks keeping secrets from us this entire time?”

castle sighs, now unphased by your violence, “i assume warner told you.”

“we trusted you! and all you did was keep us in the dark about our own fucking life!”

“what the hell is going on?”

“does juliette know?”

“i talked to her not long before warner went to you.”

‘oh god,’ you thought. you worried that was the reason juliette has lacked to see you since you’ve woken up.

“miss ferrars, it was not my intention to cause pain to your or your sis— juliette.”

his error struck a nerve, “no, but it was your intention to be a liar and snake, screw you.”

you stormed out in a rage, not before doing a 180 on castle’s desk. you hoped he’d have the worst time cleaning up.

you ran. out of his office and out of the compound. away from it all. you finally stopped after being knee-deep into a forest.

not caring for your surroundings, you sat down on the nearest large rock. it was then you realized how much energy you exhausted. you took in deep breaths to regain your breathing stability. the oxygen filled your lung helped to calm you down for the first time in the past hour.

with no one around, you finally had the time to think straight without anger and despair clouding your judgement. you weren’t even sure if you could exhaust anymore tears.

but it turned out you did. going through the events of the past hour, didn’t help with processing as you thought it would. it only made you relive the heart-ache.

took half an hour to calm down your sobbing. but it was oddly comforting doing it in a place no one would hear you.

you decided didn’t wanna focus on everything you learned. not on aaron. not on being adopted. not on juliette not being your sister. not on your parents being dead before you got the chance to meet them.

you focused on what you could control — the coming continental symposium. it would be in less than a day. you had nothing prepared, not even attire; much less a speech.

you had no idea how you could show up and presume your personality from before. how could you face the supreme commander kids in a state like this? your thoughts wondered to juliette on what her plan would be. but then it hit you; how was juliette handling it?

when you thought about it, you hadn’t seen her all day. she didn’t see you when you woke up, nor before you and aaron talked. she likely didn’t take this news lightly, especially regarding her sister.

thinking about juliette having a sister, that wasn’t you, was painful. your bond wouldn’t be the same. you weren’t blood, juliette no longer had a reason to stand by your side.

despite telling yourself not to, you thought back to warner. his betrayal hurt deeper than castle’s. how could you trust him again? you couldn’t. it was over.

time passed like nothing being amongst nature. the once light blue sky, turned orange with pink hues, signaling the end of the day. you knew you couldn’t hide forever. you had to find juliette.

if your theory was right then juliette was not in her room. you brainstormed possible locations when you bumped into kenji.

“y/n? thank god, everyone’s been worried about where you went, and juliette—“

“where juliette? i need to see her now.”

“y/n… warner told me everything. i know it must be hard for you both, but i think typu both need some spac—“

you snap, “just tell me where she is kenji!”

“she’s not in the best state.”

“take me to her. now.”

kenji reluctantly leads you to the door of anderson’s office. when you saw it was locked, you pounded on the wood relentlessly.

“c’mon, let’s just go.” kenji persists.

“juliette! open the door!”

“go away.”

“juliette, please let me in. i wanna talk.”

“i don’t wanna speak to you.”

“well, i do.”

“you’re not my real sister, so leave me alone!”

“fine,” you scoff, “hopefully you treat your new sister a lot better than your treating me right now.”

“fuck you.”

“fuck you too!” you throw back.

“…bad time to say i told you so?”

you rolled your eyes at kenji’s remark and walk away. your anger resurged, and you needed somewhere to blow off steam. training room had been unfortunate to be your victim.

when you saw no one in sight, you took it as a sign to proceed. in a matter of seconds, objects where tossed across the room through your levitation. weights were scattered, some broken, benches were bent out of shape, even a few treadmills weren’t so kindly spared. you’d feel bad about the damage later, but it felt so good in that moment to get angry.

it was dark outside when your adrenaline was closing to nothing. your only had energy to sit on a mat laid across the floor. you figured you’d take a quick power nap before going back to your room to sleep.

as soon as you closed you eyes, you were passed out. you’d hadn’t realized just how much of your energy you exerted.

aaron warner was getting back from his debriefing with delalieu, when the open door of the training room caught his eyes.

he was more than dismayed to see the damage done to what once was the training center. he was irritated that he’d have to replace basically all equipment. aaron assumed there was violent fight that happened, but then his eyes fell upon your form sleeping soundly on the floor.

now, he was more impressed than annoyed at the damage done. he would’ve been slightly proud of he wasn’t the reason for you to lash out so brutally.

aaron picked up your limp body in his arms, and carried you off to bed; taking advantage of holding you again. because he wasn’t sure the next time he’d be able to.

you were disoriented after waking up in your room, wondering how you ended up in your room when you’d fell asleep in the training room. you threw the possibly of sleeping walking to bed in, but then decides you didn’t care much for finding out.

it had been much later than you anticipated, and you were surprised no one woke you up. you dressed swiftly and headed out the door, despite a dreading feeling brewing in your gut.

first stop was to find delalieu, who actually found you first. he informed you the arrival of the newest guests and listened as he listed name. you stopped when he uttered the word ‘lena.’

“lena? as in warner’s ex-girlfriend?”

delalieu says nothing, but his eyes are looking at the ground. ‘so that’s a yes.’

great, you thought. you broke up less than twenty four hours ago and his ex already shows up.

then delalieu tells you juliette is already greeting guests, so your presence is not mandatory. he likely knows all of yesterday’s events, including your fight with her, so he’s likely trying to prevent conflict before the symposium.

a stronger person would’ve bitten the bullet and showed up anyway. but you weren’t that stronger person today. you would take to chance to avoid people you didn’t wanna see at any point.

perhaps it was a coward’s way, but you believed after everything, you were entitled to have at least one day.

you busied yourself in the office of your room; approving symposium plan and decor, looking through letters, and going through anderson’s old files — provided by delalieu.

kenji came to see you three hours before the symposium. you pretended to not here it the first couple times he knocked, but he was annoyingly persistent.

you weren’t mad at kenji, he didn’t know anything before you. but didn’t mean seeing him was easy, his presence always reminded you of juliette. you three had always hung out. now he was stuck in the middle.

kenji told you nazeera wanted to speak with you, so you granted her permission to enter. nazeera was quick to her point and told you the reestablishment’s plan; destroying sector 45. she advised you and juliette presented yourself strong at the event, to show everyone you’re a formidable enemy. plus, there was the possibility of sudden danger because of the plans the reestablishment had for juliette and you.

you found sudden danger was just always a given in your life.

you weren’t sure how you and juliette could show up united, you both were at odds and still processing everything you’ve been told. it would be nearly impossible to act as if nothing has changed.

were you even still supreme commander? you weren’t sure you ever ‘unquit’.

but, differences would have to be put aside. because everyone will be watching for your next move. and it may or may not lead to the demise of sector 45.

you missed just shooting and punching enemies.

kenji stuck around after nazeera left. you both discussed the danger to come. then, he filled you in on anything you missed, juliette’s buzzcut, warner sulking, the new guests, and, your favorite, lena being humbled by juliette.

apparently, she’d been ‘eager’ to meet you and asked juliette about your whereabouts. she referred to you as an ‘ex-girlfriend’ is what kenji told you. how she knew about the break up, you had no idea.

juliette looked her up and down before telling her you don’t waste your time with other insignificant to you.

you couldn’t help but laugh, maybe you were judging lena before knowing her, but based on that interaction; it told you enough.

once kenji left to get ready, you decided you’d do the same.

your nerves spiked the closer it got time for the big event. you spent a good hour deciding what would be best to wear. you hadn’t realized you relied on warner for fashion help until that moment.

you settled on a floor-length gown with beautiful embroidered and beaded details. you tried to avoid putting any accessories gifted to you by warner, but it was nearly impossible.

you attempted a makeup look, and you thought you did a pretty good job. and if not, kenji never frayed from being brutally honest to your face.

a guard knocked at your door to alert you that it was time. you cross your finger before exiting the room. time to face everyone you’d been avoiding.

everyone who was to go to the symposium was gathered outside the base, awaiting the vehicle to take them to the meeting location. as expected, everyone was dressed formally.

warner was quick to spot you and hurriedly walked to you. you power walked to get away from him, and hopefully find someone you liked at the moment. but, nonetheless, he caught up to you.

“i don’t wanna talk to you.”

“please, amor. hear me out.”

warner pulls you close to him, holding your hands hostage at his chest. you look into his eyes, and you can see how tired he looks. he’s hadn’t slept well, and it was obvious.

“what could you possibly have to say to me?”

“what could i possibly not have to say to you?”

“i’m sure you rather entertain you’re ex-girlfriend over day, glaring daggers to us.”

“you know that’s not true.”

“do i? i don’t know anything that’s true lately.”

“i love you. my hearts burns for you greatly, and a moment without you is one i can’t bare.”

“i don’t want to hear—“

“my heart has always been yours. i’ll never be able to take back everything i’ve done, but i refuse to lose you because of it.”

“aaron.”

“you can scream or yell at me all you want, if it means you’ll stay by my side.”

his forehead presses against yours. his eyes are focused on every feature of your face that hes already committed to memory.

“say you forgive me, amor.” he whispers so vulnerably.

you want to kiss him. you want everything to be magically better after. you want to believe this is another challenge you both can overcome.

but you can’t. at least no so soon.

you’re holding back tears, but aaron already has one going down his face.

“i can’t.” you distance yourself from warner. “every time i see you, i’m reminded of your betrayal. reminded how much heart-ache you’ve caused me. it can’t be so easily forgotten, aaron. not when i still love you so much.”

you were thankful to be distracted when the guards informed you the rides were here. but your thoughts switched as you noticed you’d have to be enclosed with aaron, juliette, and kenji for fifteen minutes, especially when you had to sit next to warner because juliette was just as mad at him as well.

you the were first out given the chance. you were overwhelmed by the amount of people who showed. thinking about juliette and you having to speak in-front of them all was intimidating. and likely all of them hoped for your demise. fun.

now, juliette took the podium, and you were next to her. you two have yet to discuss anything, so you’ll have to wing your speech to match the tone of hers.

but before she could start, the chaos begins. numerous people being protesting and berating both you & juliette and sector 45.

it was all getting jumbled, but there were various ‘traitors’, ‘you’re just children!’, and ‘freaks.’

to defend juliette, you move to the microphone and angrily demand everyone to quiet down, you do your best to yell over the voices rioting.

out of nowhere, the stage you’re standing on explodes. you’re both launched ten or more feet back. then chaos ensues.

theres a ringing in your ear, making it hard to hear anything; only you witness it all from the ground. people running left and right, the stage was now on fire, and men in uniform started invading the premises.

you see juliette lying on the ground not too far from you. you croak her name, then aaron’s and kenji’s, but you’re not sure if you’re even using your vocals.

you feel yourself being dragged away, you’re unmoving. you feel numb, not able to identify which parts of you are injured.

it’s all happening on slow motion in your vision.

you can see the same happening to juliette. with your head above the ground you see a new perspective. you finally see your friends, some are lying motionless, others are running.

you find kenji helping others escape and aaron with him taking down as many guards. then aaron spots you being dragged away, and his eyes widen. he’s on the move to reach for you, but his distraction leaves an opening for a soldier to take him down from behind.

it takes five soldiers to hold him down, he’s yelling your name, and you don’t react. they finally hand cuff him, not wasting a moment to inject him with something strong enough to incapacitate him.

kenji follow the same fate, not being able to get away invisible before nazeera knocks him out.

a man stands in front of you, blocking you from seeing the scene. you recognize the black expensive boots immediately.

“seems we both have a habit of not staying dead.”

anderson lunges the barrel of the pistol against your head — then it all went black.

you were so sick of seventeen.

taglist — @ravisinghs-wife @tom-pls-fuck-me @valeridarkness @fallonaurr @whatsupb18 @letspretendimnottrash @heart-an0n @mrsspector-grant @kikilarast10 @nina357 @lupinswolfsbanes (some aren’t tagging D: ) tysm for the support <3

[winniemaywebber]

It's Been A Long, Long Time: Lover, Come Back

Harry Crosby x Jean Crosby

There's a surprise waiting in the mail for Jean Crosby - the news of her husband returning home a four week furlough. How ever much happiness this brings her, she must contend with the sadness of her best friend and roommate, Jo, who is facing the harsh realities of her own sweetheart, Rosie, reupping rather than returning home to her.

A warm evening breeze sweeps past Jean and Josephine as they begin the short walk home from the bus stop. It was finally Friday, the two girls looking forward to a couple days of rest over the weekend. They liked to keep one weekend a month free of any plans, where they could just laze about the house in their pajamas and rejuvenate before entering the workforce reality again on Monday morning - this weekend, the final one of June, was the one they’d chosen for the month, both of them greatly looking forward to it.

As they approach the brown brick house in the middle of a neat cul-de-sac, Jean spots the flag at mast on the mailbox. “Get the mail, doll,” she smirks, knowing Jo was practically chomping at the bit for the next letter from her love. Robert Rosenthal had just re-upped, separating the couple for much longer than Jo had initially envisioned, the subject always covered with disdain and sharp words whenever it was brought up. Jean knew by now to avoid it unless Jo herself sounded off about it.

With a heavy sigh, she silently hands the stack of mail to her companion after quickly rifling through it, hoping to spot that familiar scrawled penmanship on an envelope. “Not today,” Jo says through subtly gritted teeth, holding her hand out for the keys and unlocking the door before throwing her purse on to the telephone table. “It’s been two weeks, what on Earth could he be doing? Do you think the letter simply got lost?”

“No, dear,” she sighs. “You know mail has been a little slow lately, maybe it’s just taking its time to get here from England.”

“You don’t think…” she gulps, pausing with the fear that grips her throat, “you don’t think he’s the one that is lost, do you?”

“Goodness, Jo, darling,” Jean comforts, wrapping her arm around her friend’s heaving shoulders as she sits down on one of the dining chairs. “Sweetheart, you know Binger would contact us at the first sign of any trouble like that, hm?”

“I guess,” Jo shrugs. “Get it over with then. What do you have?”

Jean flips through the envelopes, spotting the only other handwriting that’s familiar to her. Jo sees it too, her eyes widening with fear as they fill with tears.

“Now, doll,” Jean says, trying her best to keep a calm voice. “I’m sure it’s just him writing to me to tell me the goings on on base. Breathe, Josephine.”

“Mhm,” she nods, her brow furrowed with the effort of speaking through a closed throat. Jean tears the letter from its envelope and begins to read.

“Mrs Crosby,

I’ll be on my way home to you next week. I’ll be with you for four weeks and I can hardly wait.

See you in New York.

Binger.”

Jean’s mouth drops open, trying to formulate words that won’t come out.

“Well?” Jo urges, eyes darting across her friend’s face to gauge any emotion. “What is it?!”

“He’s–he’s…”

“Spit it out, Mrs Croz.”

“He’s coming home!” Jean squeals, the information finally sinking in and causing her to emphatically jump up and down, her heels clacking on the kitchen floor. It’s when she stops to smile at Jo that she sees her face fall, hand on her chest to steady the ragged breaths she’s pushing from her body. “Jo? Oh, darling. Come here.”

“Should be me hugging you, not the other way around,” she sobs, dampening Jean’s dress. She gulps and sniffs, Jean pulling a chair from the head of the table to sit next to her. “I’m sorry, I really am happy for you, it’s just–”

“I wasn’t being fair,” she says with a shake of her head. “Being that excited wasn’t right of me.”

“No! You should be excited; you’re about to see your husband after two years. It’s just…I don’t know, Jean. I’m so…”

“Angry?”

“Yes!” she blurts out, wiping at her face angrily. “How could he sacrifice the future we’ve been planning together because he’s just so prideful? It makes me so mad. So disgustingly mad.”

“I know,” Jean soothes, holding Jo’s head to her. “But at least you’ll worry less with Bing around.”

“How?” Jo replies, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

“He won’t lie to you. He’ll tell you what’s what. The truth about how Robert is truly coping.”

“That’ll help, I guess, but–”

“But you’d rather have him home,” Jean interjects. “To dance with at Minton’s and go home together.”

Jo nods sadly, fresh tears springing into her eyes. “I just want my Robbie home with me,” she weeps, whimpering like a small child.

“I know, darling. I know.”

“Ugh, I’m sorry,” Jo sniffs. “I really am happy for you, Jean. When will he be here?”

Jean pulls the letter out again, eyes rushing over the words. “Next week,” she nods. “Wants me to meet him in the city.”

Jo looks over at the note in her hand, scanning over it herself. She inhales, bracing herself for the reaction to what she’s about to suggest. “I’ll call Jules in the morning.”

“Whatever for?” Jean screeches, eyes narrowing.

“I can’t be here while you and Harry, you know…” she pauses, lips purse to try and hold in a juvenile giggle. “Make up for lost time.”

Jean releases the most girlish little giggle that causes Jo to break into the same laughter, the two girls holding each other as the amusement peels off them.

“While you’re correct - we absolutely will be doing that - it isn’t fair that you should have to go somewhere else. This is your home, Jo.”

“I’ll come right back after Harry has returned, mark my words. But, I don’t want to hear, well…all that making up for lost time!”

“No, no, I get it. You have to promise me you’ll come home though. Please?”

“Darling, I promise. Aside from Robbie, you are my person.”

“And you’re mine, too.”

***

With a heavy sigh, Jean exits her eerily empty house. When she had asked Jo to move in with her all those months ago, she could never have imagined an outcome where she was alone again after so long. Part of her understood why Jo had left, agreeing with the idea that the Crosbys needed some much deserved alone time after much time apart. However, the part that she hated was this; the underlying, constant loneliness until Bing was home with her again.

Josephine had kept to her word, calling Jules the day after the pair had received Jean’s good news. She had also received a call from Vika - the girl now an integral part of their little group since they’d met at the beach - offering Josephine a few nights at her family’s hotel.

“It’ll be like a holiday,” Vika had teased, sipping at a weak martini. “It’ll be fun, a way for us to get to know each other a little better.” Jo had agreed emphatically, Jean even spending a night there with her to have a little time with the girls before the big day.

Jean spots the girls waiting at the bus stop the moment the brakes of the vehicle hiss, them all waving at one another so enthusiastically that Jean is sure all their arms may drop off. They greet one another with a girlish, juvenile squeal, the girls pulling Jean into a tight embrace. Shouts of “Hi, Mrs Crosby!” and “Eeee, the big day is tomorrow,” echo across the busy city streets as they begin their jaunt to their favorite dress shop.

***

“Remind me again which ones you liked best in the magazine?” Jo asks as she picks through racks of beautiful dresses. She finds one that Jean falls in love with instantly: a mulberry swing dress with a sweetheart neckline.

“I don’t think I need to,” Jean exhales, taking the dress from her friend. “This is gorgeous.”

“So very you, my girl,” she smiles, going back to the rack in front of her. The hangars scrape as she leafs through, a furrow upon her concentrated brow. “Is it too premature to find one for when Robbie comes home?”

Jules seems to have the same idea, rifling through a discount rack at the back of the store as Jean scouts around to find where the dressing rooms are located. Jules holds a dress up to her body, sashaying this way and that in front of Vika.

“What do you think?” she asked, a worried tone to her voice.

“Hm, not really your color, Juliet. How about…” Vika rifles through the rack herself, finding a beautiful light green a-line dress that she knows will compliment her friend perfectly. “This?”

“Vika, you’re a dream,” she compliments, admiring how the color brings out her eyes. “Aren’t you looking for something?”

“Me?” she laughs, shaking her head. “I don’t have a sweetheart to dress up for, you know that.”

“Why don’t we find you one?” Jean asks, pulling the velvet curtain back on an unoccupied stall. “I’m sure one of the boys’ friends will be raring to have a date with you.”

“My goodness, yes!” Jo replies, eyes lighting up for the first time in a week. “Say, who was the man Olive mentioned in her first letter to you, Jules? Douglass and someone? Benjamin?”

“Bernard. Benny Demarco.”

“That’s the one!”

“I’m sure he’d love that. He’s with Johnny right now…” At the mention of his name, the reminder of where he is waiting out the remainder of this dreadful war, Jules suddenly lets out a little weep. “Sorry, girls, it’s just…sometimes I just forget and it all comes flooding back to me.”

“Oh, darling,” Jo coos, holding her. “I understand.”

“We all do,” Jean squeaks, making herself scarce behind the heavy drape. Once in there, she herself lets a thick cry escape her throat, covering her mouth to muffle the sound. Of course she understands; those endless nights without her husband, waiting for a phone call or a sweet love letter - though those had become scarce these last few months. She can’t stop the tears falling down her rouged cheeks, mascara falling down her face in thick, black trails as she pulls her chosen gown on her tense body.

“Jean?” Jo calls, her voice still wavering with emotion.

“Yeah?” Jean croaks in reply, her voice cracking again. “Be right out.”

Before she can wipe her face and make her exit, Jo scrapes back the curtain to find her friend in a hell of a mess: eyes puffy and swollen, lips red from where she had bitten them to keep the wails at bay, a stress rash attacking her pale neck. “Jean, whatever is it?”

“I don’t know, I just feel–I feel like an imposter. And I feel like I’ve let you all down and–”

“Oh my goodness, darling, come here.” Jo scoops Jean up from almost falling, sitting down with her on the dressing room floor.

“I feel like I’ve failed you all.”

“Now, what on Earth are you talking about?”

“Here’s me saying I understand how you and Jules feel, yet what are we here for? To find me a pretty dress for my husband’s furlough. I feel like I just should keep my mouth shut. I feel so unfair towards you both and–”

“Now, Jean, that’s enough,” Jo replies sternly. “You are not to feel this way, do you understand? We are so happy for you, can’t you see that?” Jean nods, sniffing and wiping her tears away. “Of course we are a little envious - as would you be if it was Robbie coming home, not your Bing. The same would be said for if John were still with the fellas and he got furlough. You see?” There is a pause as Jean nods along, trying to formulate a sentence without her voice faltering. “While I am excited to see Croz, I do wish it were Robbie. I keep thinking about the life we were meant to start and he chose–”

It is Jean’s turn to comfort her friend, holding her close as they both weep together. “Look at the state of us,” Jean laughs, sniffling. “What a sight.”

“Yeah, well,” Jo weeps, pulling a handkerchief from her purse. “Nobody else I’d rather cry with, hon.”

“Me, too.”

“You’re my other half, Jean. Robbie is absolutely my soul mate, but you? Well, I thank this ghastly war for putting us together. You’re my person, Mrs Crosby. I am so blissfully happy for you.”

“Ditto. Jo?”

“Yes?”

“Love you.”

“Softie…I love you, too.”

***

Jean almost collapses all over again when she hears the price of the dress. After she and Jo had calmed down, Jo had buttoned her into it. It had fit her like a glove, the material clinging to her perfectly. “Jean!” Jo had gasped, hands on her cheeks. “You’ve got to have it!”

Now checking out, the price had taken Mrs Crosby aback just a tad. Rummaging in her purse for extra cash, Jo pointedly lays down a stack of notes. “Had a bit of a whip round,” she winks, placing a hand on top of Jean’s to stop her panicking. “It’s from all of us.”

“Josephine!” she gasps, clinging to her. “And girls, thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome, doll,” Jules replies. “I know Harry will fall to his knees the moment he sees you in that. Dare I say, you won’t be wearing it for long.”

“Juliet!” Vika urges, giggling nonetheless.

“What? Am I wrong?”

“Let’s hope not!” Jean replies, taking the dress’ garment bag from the teller. “Come on, I need a drink.”

***

The girls arrive back at Vika's family’s hotel just before nightfall, Jean carefully uncovering the hidden martini ingredients from her suitcase. “Sure is hard to keep cocktail making quiet,” she laughs as there is a sudden rap on the door.

“Shit,” Juliet giggles, stashing the bottles under the blankets. The four of them laugh like schoolgirls at a sleepover, Jean laying across the smuggled alcohol as Vika answers the door, shushing her friends.

“You need to stop!” she whispers, trying to be stern but the tone is cracked with a fit of giggles, Vika covering her mouth to stifle the laughter. “Girls, stop it, I’m going to crack a rib!” She waves her hand in front of them all, them all hushing immediately.

“Mammi,” she greets, her voice going an octave higher.

“Ruthvika,” she says, nodding towards the girls. “Please remember to keep it down, yes? We still have guests.”

“Yes, mammi, of course.”

Mrs Patel looks between her daughter and the girls, beginning to speak in Gujarati as her glance carries on going between them all. “Okay?” she finishes, walking towards the door. Vika nods again, running to open the door for her.

“Goodnight, Mrs Patel,” the girls all chorus, their warmth seeming to envelope the room. Jean can see that Vika feels it, her body seeming to relax the moment they speak.

“Goodnight, girls,” she replies, smiling at them.

Vika closes the door before leaning against it, exhaling and holding her chest dramatically. “That was close.”

“Sure was, doll,” Jules giggles, the bottles clanging as she pulls the blanket back. “Now, who’s up for a drink? We need to have one for our Mrs Crosby, who we are so excited for.”

“We certainly are,” Jules replies, holding on to Jean’s hand and grinning at her. “We love you, Mrs Croz. Truly.”

“And I love you all, too. So much.”

***

“This is it,” Jo says, as she and the group hear the whistle of a train in the distance. “Now, have you got everything?”

“I think so,” Jean replies, her voice tiny, tight and anxious. She chews at the inside of her mouth with worry, the nausea beginning to settle in with each moment the train draws closer.

“Enough of that, Mrs Croz,” Jo scolds as she sees her friend's eyes glaze over and continuously bite her lips. “You'll make yourself bleed.”

“Speaking of having everything,” Jules perks up, “do you have a book for the journey, doll?”

“I don't,” she squeaks, remembering the rushed packing she had done days ago. “I didn't even think of anything like that.”

“Well, luckily for you, I did!” She triumphantly smiles, pulling a small paperback out of her purse. “Thought you'd enjoy this one. It's one of my favorites - Olive’s too.”

“A Midsummer Night’s Dream,” Jean reads, stroking the titled cover. “Thank you, Juliet. So much.”

“And this is from Mammi,” Vika joins, handing her a small paper bag. “In case you get hungry on the way.”

“Oh, girls. Thanks ever so.”

The four of them look between one another, an awkward silence hanging in the air as Jean and Jo catch each other's eye.

“Come on, Ruthie,” Jules says, taking her by the arm. “Let's go wait inside, yes?”

“Fantastic idea. Bye, Jean!”

With Jean and Jo left alone for the first time in days, it takes everything in Jean to not break out into sobs. A moment of silence passes between them, the pair seemingly lost for words for the first time their entire friendship. Jean opens her mouth to say something, distracted by Jo pulling her into a tight hug.

“Have the most wonderful time, Mrs Croz.”

“Jo…I–I'm so sorry.”

“Enough of that, darling. You have nothing to apologize for.”

“But…”

“No buts, lady. I'll see you soon, okay?”

“I'll miss you so much.”

“I'll miss you, too. But, believe me, this is a good thing,” she sighs, pulling out of the hug, but keeping her hands on Jean’s shoulders. “For both of us.”

“All aboard!”

Jo hands Jean her suitcases, Jean planting a kiss on her cheek.

“Love you, doll.”

“Love you more.”

***

The train carriage feels stiflingly hot, Jean removing every layer she possibly can while trying her best to look calm. Her jacket is flung onto the seat next to her, followed by her silk scarf and pretty gloves, sweat dripping down her back and making her unable to get comfortable in the plush seat. She tells herself to try and keep breathing, taking shaky inhales and exhaling them as the train chugs on. Jean pays no mind to the scenery zooming past. It has all suddenly become so real, the reality weighing on her that she is about to see her husband for the first time in years.

Would he still love her? she wonders, as she pulls the book Jules gave her from her bag. Would he still think she’s pretty? Would he even be the same man? She wasn’t the same woman, that much was certain - she felt she had grown in great strides since he had shipped out, learning so much about herself in the time they had been apart.

The words begin to blur together on the page, Jean barely able to make a sentence string together in her mind by the time the train stops. The conductor calls out their location: “This is Grand Central Station. This stop is Grand Central Station.”

She feels the nerves bubbling up in her gut, the butterflies causing her to become weak at the knees and she hopes they can hold her up long enough to disembark the train carriage. As her foot touches the ground of the platform, she cranes her head up in the hopes of spotting Bing on the platform, the station seemingly the busiest it’s ever been on today of all days.

It’s when she cuts through a group congregating around a bench that she spots him in the distance - his hair looks different: slicked back to the side, his usually tousled curls combed into some new found submission, not tumbling down his forehead carelessly like they used to. He stands taller, hands less fidgety and his aura less anxious. Jean finds herself frozen to the spot, jagged breaths leaving her parted lips as she takes him in for the first time in what feels like forever. She’s not even sure she recognizes him at first; his sweet face is a little more aged from the stress and horrors he’s endured since leaving for England. But it’s his eyes - those big, brown, downturned cow eyes that send her heart aflutter and make her brain register that it’s really him. Those same eyes light up in recognition, his mouth slightly agape as she sees his chest fall at the sight of her after all these years.

She begins to run, closing the smallest space that’s been between them in years and leaps into his arms.

“Darling,” she weeps, her throat closing as tears fall onto him. “Darling, darling,” she repeats, her arms wound tightly around his neck.

“Jean…oh, Jean,” he murmurs into her, holding her just as tightly. “Let me look at you.”

He places her down on the ground gently, as if he were touching a precious antique. “My goodness, Mrs Crosby,” he says, taking her chin in his hand. “I could just kiss the face off you.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?” she giggles, the sound cut off by her husband’s mouth capturing hers in a tender kiss, neither of them wanting it to cease.

“I love you,” he murmurs into her mouth, never breaking the affection. “I’m sorry I ever went away.”

“I love you, Binger,” she replies, kissing him over and over, not caring who is watching. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

taglist: @sagesolsticewrites @blakelysco-pilot @hephaestn @manonsmanicmind @derry-rain @bobparkhurst @archival-hogwash @lestweforget5 @butterfly9012 @ptvstvrrr

[bettyfrommars]

hi loves

a wee announcement/bit of reflection below the cut

nothing heavy, just some thoughts & updates

First of all, I want to say I love this fandom so much. Truly I do. It has carried me though possibly the hardest, loneliest year of my life (and this ol' girl has been though some dark times). I've made friendships here that I hope to cherish for the rest of my life.

I came into fanfiction in October of last year, after not writing anything substantial for almost a decade. My dear friend at the time said she was looking for a specific Eddie Munson story, so I wrote it for her. I wrote it in first person because I didn't even understand how "reader perspective" was a thing, that's how wet behind the ears I was to this world. My friend, on the other hand, is a well-versed fic reader, and I distinctly remember messaging her like, "okay, what the hell is a Y/N??"

I spent that entire dark, cold winter writing and passing it to her in parts like notes in a classroom. The rush of getting back to something I loved so deeply after so much time away turned me into a monster. I lived and breathed that story. We sent endless messages back and forth every day about what each character would do next, imagining ourselves in that world, with Eddie. We made playlists, we cried. We screamed and giggled and kicked our feet when they finally kissed. We mourned the loss when it ended and moped around a bit before going back to read it all over again. Some 40k words and four months later I realized, holy shit, I think I write fanfiction now?

In a way, fanfiction saved my life. It brought me back to a part of myself I had buried, a part of me that worried it might never see the light of day again. It came crawling out of the ground, gasping for air like, "you better stretch your fingers bitch because I have a lot to say."

In April, I started posting here when the fandom was notably beginning to wane, but I was happy to see there were so many still going hard for our man. I kinda creeped in, like a little scuttling crab, and was grateful to find that a handful of you embraced me.

Long story short, I am NOT leaving, not at all. I know the tone is there, but that is not what this is, lmao. I will hopefully keep this blog for as long as you will have me. I plan to finish writing I'm on Fire and Death Becomes Us, as well as maybe another bit for gargoyle!Eddie, and nightmare!Eddie, but the other series I've started (or planned to start) will stay on hiatus for a while, possibly forever. I will continue to post blurbs and hc's and whatnot, but I won't be committing to any new series or long fics.

My masterlists will remain intact for the time being for those who want to enjoy what is there. That being said, The Nightmare Factory and Stop the World and Melt with You, might be taken down in the future only because I plan to re-work them into original stories. I have a second non-fandom blog in the works that is dedicated to monsters, nightmares, and magic realism, and I will let those who are interested know about it when the time comes.

Mostly, I wanted to let you know that, even if you notice some changes, I will continue to persist with "My 2 Joe's" delulu era, possibly until the earth swallows me up. I am no longer taking requests, but my asks will always be open for thots, blurbs, obsessions, etc. You know how much I love hearing from you.

That's all really. Perhaps this is simply one of those "end of year" thought dumps, but I also wanted to say a heartfelt Thank You to those who continue to support me, enjoy my work, and share it. My Ride or Die monsterfuckers and biker Eddie enthusiasts. My nightmare Eddie dreamers, my Twilight Zone Eddie pineapple heads. My gargoyle Eddie romantics who cheer on our Stone Boy, and my Hybrid Steve lovers who leave their windows open at night. My True Blood friends who appreciate a vampire Eddie who is nothing like Bill Compton. My darlings, my fellow rebel rousers and misfits, my friends.

This is a very symbiotic relationship, and I could not/would not do this without you ❤️

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Replies! About Jamil’s roommate, twst boys making each other jealous, Jade feeding Silver funny mushrooms (again) and some other twst stuff.

Anonymous asked:

hi i love ur art sm. i love how often u draw ortho bc some of the twst fandom always leave him out <//3 thank u and have a great day!!

Thank you, Anon!! It means a lot! <3

Ortho really is underappreciated, and I think a lot of people just aren’t sure what to do with him… and some people are genuinely uncomfortable with him lol But he has so much to offer and is so unique and interesting that I can’t really help it. He is a joy to draw, and I am always happy when people like drawings of him.

Have a great day too!

Anonymous asked:

I don't like your latest artwork at all. At all!!! It's smug aura mocks me...

that feeling when you realize you will never have a cozy morning jamil greeting you when you wake up. why even live

(DON'T READ THE REST of this ask if you don't want spoilers for his birthday vignette, I don't even know if what I'm going to say counts as spoilers or if you care about these kind of vignettes)

They briefly introduced Jamil's mob roommate, and of course we don't get to know a lot about him (he's a mob after all), but I thought it was funny that his main contribution to the vignette was sleeping through every noise Jamil makes (like drying his hair or when his alarm clock goes off). I like to think that he is the one mob student who just isn't interested in Jamil in the slightest. It's not that he doesn't think he is pretty, it's just that it does nothing for him. Jamil, you need to treasure him!

Ouch, Anon! But also, fair! There is nothing to like about that latest artwork! If anything, it’s offensive! 😤 (thank you so much <333 and also thank you for this existential dread; why even live indeed…)

I KEEP FORGETTING THAT THE MAJORITY OF THESE BOYS HAVE ROOMMATES OMG Jamil and his mob roommie!! 🥹 lol it really would be funny if he was that one (1) Scarabia student who doesn’t have the hots for Jamil. Poor Jamil really needs to have one person around him that doesn’t look at him like a hungry animal. And finding this one guy took so much luck from Jamil that he remained luckless for the rest of his life 😔 rip

But also maybe this guy is just very good at pining quietly…

Anonymous asked:

re: jack x epel, i can see epel hooking up with people (slut smh) and not wanting any strings attached, and although i think jack wouldn’t be into hooking up…sometimes deuce isn’t around when he’s unbearably horny and he does share a class with epel, who’s more than happy to help a hot buff wolf man…and sometimes deuce will hang around ace and it makes jack jealous so he recruits epel to make deuce jealous >:3

the drama!

Oh god, the first years just keep fucking each other to make each other jealous!! 😭 This is why romance is forbidden in this kind of schools, because otherwise this shit happens! (fun fact: I have a little comic about Ace recruiting Epel to make Deuce jealous, but for now it’s only been posted on ko-fi) In all seriousness, these boys really are horny and petty enough for all kinds of drama to happen.

Epel would also probably be very into the fact that he is being this cool and mature… he would expect to be more experienced by Jack but 😔

Anonymous asked:

So which of the twst cast would flirt with someone else to get someone jealous? Also who would do it for funsies, to get back at them as petty revenge or some other petty reason?

APPARENTLY THE ENTIRETY OF THE FIRST YEAR! Shame on them! Shame on these boys! Sebek is the only normal one! 😡

In reality though, I can see Ace doing it; Deuce wouldn’t do it intentionally, he just ends up in these situations that make Ace jealous. Epel would absolutely try to do it though. Ortho might too, actually, but he would just tease a little bit…

Azul would be petty enough to do it but he isn’t super liked by others, so there probably won’t be much flirting happening lol Idia might tease Azul like that though, but it would backfire horribly somehow. I wouldn’t call it “flirting” though because Idia isn’t much of a flirt, but complimenting someone for being good at board-games is enough to get Azul mad.

Jade would do it in a very obvious way, almost too crudely for how sneaky and manipulative he usually is. But that’s absolutely intentional.

Jamil probably would, but not with Kalim – he knows that this kind of thing wouldn’t really work with him, and they don’t have this kind of relationship… pissing Azul off would be funny to him though because his reactions are very obvious.

Vil might do it a little bit; I keep thinking about that one jp RookVil comic about Vil surrounding himself with the Savanaclaw mobs during Beanfest and thinking  “it wouldn’t hurt for you to get jealous every once in a while”. Not something he usually goes for, but if he is feeling a little bit petty (i.e. after the VDC)? Easily.

Rook and Lilia both do it a lot but it’s never their intention to make someone else jealous lol

Malleus would be petty enough to do something like that though. As someone who often feels left out and neglected, he would be overjoyed to see someone getting jealous of him and upset with him flirting with someone else. He made Lilia jealous a couple of times, and it’s always such a big win for him that he can’t stop grinning very smugly…

Anonymous asked:

So apparently there is a mushroom called caterpillar mushroom which works similarly to viagra....

Jade likes mushrooms

Take what you want from this ask..... 😈

Anon, the mushroom itself is both fascinating and disturbing at the same time. Jade would be enamoured by it; both by how difficult it is to grow it and how powerful it is. He absolutely will start growing some. Why do you have caterpillars in your room, Jade? No reason. What is it that grows on their little silly heads? Just a little project…

He will definitely take his time deciding what would be the best use for it, but since he has to check if it works or not anyway, he would need a guinea pig. I guess it means Silver is getting another risotto 🤤

m1lk-n-cook1es asked:

A little prompt I had after reading the  Sleeping Beauty alternate story "Once Upon a Nightmare" that I found on AO3

"Silver fell to a sleeping spell that lasts for nine months. During this time, Lilia nonconed Silver roughly, and Silver ended up pregnant. And after Lilia found out he was pregnant, he began banging Silver in his sleep. One day, during the last day of the spell, Silver woke up in pain (both from contractions and Lilia banging him). Lilia banged Silver as he gave birth to twins. Lilia was disappointed he woke up, but happy that he had kids and planned to play with Silver more"

What a lovely family these two are 🥹

Really makes you think about how fucked up the original fairy tale actually is. It really is the somnophilia story, and Silver is the absolute star of it! Thanks Lilia for being this horrible.

While the topic of pregnancy and giving birth isn’t something that I like, the dark fucked up vibe of this prompt makes it kind of fun…

Anonymous asked:

This but with Lilia: https://youtu.be/AD95PSX7ntE?si=DRQmAWJBuonRvATT

Oh my GOD this is literally Lilia NOOOO

With his silly dance and his historically accurate Exes!

(in all seriousness, I am stunned by the production quality and editing of this video lol very impressive!!)

[midwesternwitchery]

Hi I am obsessed with your Konig story I come back to re-read it all the time! Makes me kick my feet lol when do you think the next chapter will be? My cage bars need some gnawing

-🌮

Well Hello there. I know I suck Ive been gone such is life. Anywhooooo here's a thing. I hope you like it taco! I had almost given up on this fic as I have been kinda hard on myself lately just one of those impostor syndrome things so THANK YOU for your ask I love it when people interact in any way but literally this made my day! If you have any suggestions please feel free to send them my way anon or not!

Die Sonne - Part 5

a/n- Again I'm not totally happy with this and I swear smut is coming. MDNI

All of her belongings had been packed up carefully over the last few days. She groaned rolling over in bed, it was tempting to lay around in bed for another hour but she had things to do, places to be. Oh shit. She sat up in bed. It was today. THE day. She had been struggling a bit internally. The more time that passed from her meeting at the agency, the more she was doubting her decisions. 

She couldn’t dwell on it now though as whats done is done. She had let her omega make the decision for her. One whiff of his intoxicating scent and her omega was practically preening. It would have been embarrassing but she couldn’t help it, honesty it didn’t seem like he minded though. Her thoughts drifted back to the way he seemed to zero in on her even through the blindfold. His instincts have to be off the charts considering his apex status. 

She rolled out of bed heading straight for the kitchen for a cup of coffee first thing. Once she had that started she began picking out her outfit for the morning. She’d be meeting him for the first time without the blindfold. She wanted- no needed to look her best, she really wanted this to work. Settling on a light flowing skirt, a long sleeve scoop neck top, and her knee high boots she was ready. She didn’t want anyone with her on her way to his home. She was nervous enough she didn’t need to add another person into the mix. Her things had been sent over to his home yesterday, the rest went to storage until she decided what she was doing with them. 

She pulled up the address on her phone, fingers shaking slightly, either from her anxiety or too much coffee. He lived near the downtown center. Her eyebrows raised a little when she realized he was in one of the larger high rise buildings. Grabbing her bag and coat she navigated her way to the subway. The ride wasn’t long, then she was back out on the street, another few minutes walk and she found herself standing at the entry to his building. 

The doorman opened the door gesturing her inside. She clumsily thanked him as she stepped inside, making her way to the elevators. Glancing back down to her phone to check the floor number she pressed the button and whoosh she was off.

Ding.

Ding

Ding

The doors opened to a small entryway. There was another door ahead of her. She stepped forward trying to keep her breath steady, and knocked.

A few moments passed with no response. Anxiety clawed at her throat as she checked the address and floor number triple checking she was at the right door. She was. So she knocked again. Cringing the entire time.

The door opened and all she could see was skin. Wet skin. Slowly she looked up taking in the towel around his waist, the water running down his chest and abs. Craning her neck she looked up at his face realizing neither of them had said anything and she had been caught staring. 

“Maus?” His voice rumbled through his chest. 

She was still staring. She had to stop staring. She shut her eyes for a moment in a futile attempt to get her self under control, “Hello König. Did I interrupt you?” Glancing down at his chest again she blushed. He on the other hand seemed to have a mixed reaction to her. His chest puffed up a bit but quickly he deflated backing away from the door gesturing for her to enter. “A moment Maus.” He stuttered out, “I- Ich komme gleich wieder” Then his back was turned as he fled further into the apartment. 

It seemed the big bad Apex Alpha was nervous too. That put her at ease a bit, at least they were evenly matched in that area. She stepped further into the apartment down a short hallway which led into the open floor plan that was the main living space. A large plush couch sat on one side a large TV across from it. The kitchen and dining sat off on the other side of the living area another hall way branching off to the side. Assuming she had interrupted his shower she decided to make her self comfortable on the couch until he came back out. 

As she rounded the couch she noticed the entire space seemed off. Her brow furrowed as she sniffed the air, then after looking around a bit she sniffed the couch cushion. It smelled sterile almost, like everything was brand new and staged. A small huff left her. He didn’t have any belongings displayed that looked personal. Maybe this was a new place she reasoned, but the file she had on him stated this address as his primary for the last 3 years. Before she could think on it further he reappeared fully dressed this time. His hair was still 

‘I can show you around if you like?’ He motioned behind him back down the hallway he’d come from. Mina nodded and rose from the couch approaching him. He turned flicking the hall light on and stepping to the side motioning for her to go first and explore. As passed him she hesitated feeling the heat radiating from him, his scent was so strong spicy and clean from the shower. A low rumble startled her out of her daze, eyes flying wide she looked up at him realizing quickly she all but had her face pressed up against him sniffing him. 

His eyes were pure predator, sharp and focused on her. Mina sucked in a breath. Shit. That definitely didn’t help anything she thought as his scent enveloped her senses. She felt like she was on the edge of starting her heat, but that was a ways off still right? She couldn’t think straight enough to even begin to do the math right now. 

His hand came up and circled her throat, not squeezing, just resting there. It felt … possessive but also protective like he was laying some claim on her. Regardless it cleared her mind a bit as he pressed her back into the wall behind her. His dark eyes devoured her as he bent his head down to hers. Pausing briefly he spoke, his voice thickly accented. ‘I’ve though of nothing but this since you left that room, but I do not want to scare you Maus….many fear me. I do not want that from you.’

Blinking up at him confused Mina was trying to make sense of his words. ‘But I’m not scared of you.’ He smiled at her softly. ‘Good girl.’ he murmured and lowered his head fully into the crook of her neck. She let out a soft gasp of air as his sharp nose pressed to her scent gland, sending shocks of shivers down her body. Her arms raised to grasp at his shoulders while his other arm snaked around her waist raising her up to his height. Instinctively her legs raised to wrap around his waist trying to hold her self up as he pressed into her further. 

He groaned deep in his chest as his hips settled against hers. She buried her face into his neck inhaling his scent. His arms tightened around her, she should be panicking at that, but god it felt so good to be held by him. She should push him away, not that it would do much good against his much larger frame.

The truth was she should do a lot of things but for once she just didn’t want to. She liked the way his body felt against hers, the way he smelled, the way he looked at her like she was precious to him because she was Mina not because of her designation. She could almost envision a life with him, but that could just be the hormones. 

She arched her back, pressing further into him. This seemed to snap him out of it a bit and he stiffened for a tense moment, then raised his head and began to lower her to the floor. She tightened her legs around his waist, resisting his attempt to release her. His eyes shot to hers, it felt like he was looking straight into her soul. Finally with a heavy breath he said, ‘I have a room prepared for you. They said you would want your own space.’ 

‘Oh. I see.’ she murmured quickly releasing her legs from his waist suddenly embarrassed at her actions. What the hell was she doing? She practically threw herself at him, and she definitely climbed him like a damn tree. Her face flamed a bright red as she turned from him straightening her hair and clothing out. She didn’t want to look at him and let him see how much he had affected her. He had accepted her as a mate but she couldn’t help but feel a slight sting of rejection. 

Before she could escape to lick her wounds in peace his hand reached out and grasped her chin, tilting her face up to his. Stubbornly she kept her eyes on his chest, refusing his silent request to look at him. König ducked his head forcing her to look at him. After a moment he clicked his tongue, ‘Ah little Maus do not be sad. This is not a no.’ He paused for a moment looking for the words. ‘This is a not right now. You have just come to my home, alone at that. I wish for you to settle in, relax, there is no pressure here for you. You are safe with me.’ He said the last bit with a little growl. 

Relief washed over her at his words. He wanted her but he was right. She needed rest and to get accustomed to her new surroundings and mate. She nodded to him gesturing to the hallway, ‘I’ll follow you this time.’ she smiled at him and for the first time he smiled back like really smiled. And god was it brilliant. 

He showed her to her room down the hall to the right, there were two doors opposite each other. He gestured to the door on the left, ‘My room is here and yours is…here.’ He opened the door to her room gesturing for her to enter. All of the air left her body. Every surface was covered with flowers, a wild rainbow of color in every direction. Beyond that the bed sat in the center covered with overstuffed pillows and fabrics of all types, some soft and silky others more like a plush fur. To the right was the door to an attached bathroom with a sunken tub and on the left was a massive walk in closet. 

She turned in a circle in the center of the room, breathless at the effort he had put into her room here with him. When her eyes found his he stepped forward to grasp her face in his large palms, his thumbs brushing the tears she hadn’t noticed spilling over. ‘Maus why do you-Ah what is the word?- tears? No. Cry! Why do you cry?’ his words spilled out so fast she began to laugh. His face morphed into one of real concern at my emotional state. 

‘No I’m fine please I’m sorry I don’t mean to worry you its just… No one has ever put this much effort into anything for me. I guess its all a bit overwhelming.’ He nodded in agreement as he wiped the last of her tears away. He touched his forehead to hers before whispering, ‘Go. Take a bath and relax. I’ll have dinner ready when you’re done.’ Then he was gone leaving her to do as he said.

She waited until she was sure he was far enough away before squealing like a little girl and dropping face first into her new bed. Maybe this could work after all. 

Translations -

Maus - Mouse

Ich komme gleich wieder - I'll be right back

[redbreastedbird]

hello oh my goodness you're on tumblr 😭😭😭I don't really know how to convey how HAPPY your books make me feel. I re-read mmu books one through five for christmas and I intend to re-read the rest before mua three is out!

arkjdmsb I don't even know what to say except a huge big massive THANK YOU for creating this amazing universe where anyone and everyone can be gay and solve crimes. nuala holds a special place in my heart as we're both bespectacled autisic irish people. every time she speaks irish I gain like three years of life expectancy. I love hazel to pieces as well. when I was younger, she felt like a friend to me, like I had just accidentally picked up her casebooks and solving crimes alongside her and daisy (and of course the junior pinkertons!)

I will never forget reading the last chapter of the body in the blitz and coming to the realisation that like. almost everyone in this room is queer. and this is a kids book in an era of draconian book-banning legislation, and there are just queer characters right there. just being people, really really good people, existing almost a hundred years ago. neurodivergent, poc, disabled, queer and trans characters. yes!

I am just rambling oh my god 🤦love you lots and keep up the incredible, ground-breaking, joyous work <3

This is so nice?! Thank you so so much. And yes, this is everything I wanted to do with my books.

Sarah Waters has a line about how she writes historical novels about queer women because she wants to show her readers that queer women have always existed, and I really internalised that. It matters so much to be able to show that none of this is new - that humans have always been every identity they are today, it’s just that mainstream culture never wanted to admit it. I’m trying to put the reality back into history - honestly, I’ve probably underestimated the diversity, if anything.

I know I have said this a lot, but I grew up under section 28 in the UK, in a time when you basically could not show queer characters in a children’s book (the only queer characters I remember seeing were the angels in His Dark Materials), and so it took me a long time to really trust that I was allowed to put queer characters in my own books. Making Daisy on the page queer was one of the scariest things I had ever done, and I still sort of cannot believe I did it. But it means so much to me to just be able to put on the page now that oh, George has a boyfriend now, and for it to be a basically unremarkable thing. And also to create a trans character with Anna, who transitioned before the novel and is now just living her life!

I really hope that there’s a generation of authors coming up now who have grown up with books like mine and who will do this kind of thing even more readily than I have been able to. The world is such a scary place for people who don’t fit into the norm, but there are so many of us, just out there living our lives, and books help us see that.

Long story short: be gay solve crimes. ❤️

[lookatmysillies]

AREPH Main Facility - Eddy POV

Tallis was brought to the facility shortly after Round 7.

While his companion, the guard, Hayate, was dragged unconscious to the lower high-security floors that Eddy had yet to attain access to, Tallis was immediately transferred to the ICU. Usually, this space was reserved for injured workers, but Tallis was an exception. He was placed in the same bed that Eddy had been vacated from after a long rest and recovery following its near-death encounter with the target Solei. Or... whatever they were now. Eddy wasn't certain. It was still set on the idea that it could save them and bring them home after such a long absence.

While Eddy was slowly integrated back into the field, they lingered in Tallis's room during the long days. At first, they merely observed him; a real Alien Stage contestant, up close! It was a marvel. He was marked for death by his loss against the contestant Daiki with her edgy wit and charm, but AREPH must've had bigger plans.

Maybe they brought Eddy a friend after all this time. They hadn't had a friend for a very long time. Not since... not since him.

Eddy tried not to think too much about Sebastian most days. Some days they allowed themselves to look at his baby pictures and smile and tear up.

Tallis was a lot - well, bigger than Sebastian was, but he worked well as a friend all the same. Eddy clumsily re-braided his hair whenever his braids loosened in his unresponsive state. It checked Tallis's IVs and the bandages on his midsection, one for the first bullet (it definitely got him good, but only pierced the fatty tissue of his side) and another for the second, which had pierced his abdomen. The aliens who tended to Tallis's health joked that Eddy might as well be their boss, seeing as it was there even more than they were.

It read case files to Tallis to stimulate his mind, ate meals in his presence and told him that he would love the pudding from the caf once he woke up, studied his calloused fingers (how did they get so rough?) and gently wiped his face and neck with a wet cloth every now and then to keep him clean. When one day, Tallis was transported to the lower levels where Eddy couldn't go, it was sad to see its new best friend go. Waiting for him to wake up felt like it was taking forever.

When he re-emerged a few weeks later, he was still asleep - kept in a medically induced coma, the doctors told Eddy, for his health. They told him he should wake soon and put him in one of their medical observation rooms. Eddy couldn't braid Tallis's hair anymore, as it had been buzzed sometime when he was gone, but they could resume their usual routine.

Until Tallis did finally wake a few nights after Eddy monitored Round 16 to watch for Aurien and Solei.

And Tallis was not happy.

They got past the initial awkwardness after Tallis threw things at them the night he woke up and spit in their face. Tallis must've realized relatively quickly that he was surrounded by aliens and his best bet was to let the only other human stick around.

He rejected Eddy's friendly gestures for a solid week. He pushed away the warm washcloths and refused to eat much of the food Eddy offered him despite his gaunt, sunken appearance. The only times he addressed Eddy directly (or anyone, really) was to ask questions.

Where am I? The AREPH facility. Where's the facility? I'm so sorry, I can't tell you that! How am I alive? The guard saved you - I'm glad he did, too! Where is he, then? Undergoing treatment in the lower levels, then he'll probably be questioned. Are you going to question me? Soon, yes, we think you might have information pertinent to our investigations.

Tallis's jaw ticked at those words, and Eddy knew he knew what that meant.

Tallis had ties to high-profile figures.

(And that was the only reason he still lived, not because his life had any worth to anyone, but because he had information on the people who really mattered in the eyes of others.)

Which brought them to their first compromise.

Eddy wasn't technically allowed to show Tallis any information regarding Season 39 of Alien Stage. He was supposed to be in the dark.

But it broke Eddy's heart to reject him any information on his friends, Tov and Himei. He cared about them. He had a human connection with them, like Eddy had a human connection with Sebastian once upon a time.

"I'll be your friend if you tell me if they're okay," Tallis said ever so quietly one night from his bed, eyes wide and teary. "Just tell me if they're alive. Tell me how many of my friends are still alive."

And Eddy broke.

"Tov," Eddy whispered in his ear so no sound systems would pick up on it. "Himei, and all the others who won their rounds before you, all but Vera. Khoi." Tallis's eyes fluttered shut. "Lark, Akane, Jae, Lang, and Onyx."

Tallis's throat caught on a harsh swallow. "No Castor?"

Eddy hesitated, wishing not to have to be the one to confirm it.

"No Castor," it murmured, shrinking away when Tallis's face briefly crumpled, a single tear released from his eye. Then he wiped his face with his blanket like a small child might and forced a stoic look upon his face, though his lips still trembled.

"Tell me," Tallis said shakily, "who wins the next row. If you can."

Eddy couldn't turn him down again after that.

"I can."

AREPH had different plans.

Eddy didn't have to tell him one thing, because for Rounds 17 and 21, Tallis was placed on a chair in the observation room with wires and electrodes attached to his head. Eddy and a few others had already taken a few cracks each at getting Tallis to talk about his classmates and he had thus refused.

"Is this necessary?" Eddy whispered to the small alien named Yakun, chewing on the inside of their cheek behind their facemask. Tallis's face was nearly green with sick as the countdown to Tov's round whittled down, his friend about to meet the fate she was destined for either way.

Eddy hoped she won, for Tallis's sake and their own preferences. She was Eddy's favorite contestant. She was radiant.

"It is," Yakun told it. "If he won't tell us about his connections, we'll learn ourselves."

Tallis had already been irritable and jittery since he woke up from his coma. Now, he was downright mercurial as the round progressed live on a projector before him. He shook violently in his seat from the beginning till the end. When Lark hit the floor, he covered his eyes, his mouth moving in what could be some silent prayer. He only removed his hands when the announcer bellowed Tov's name.

Round 21 was worse. Like Round 17, Tallis's friend took the early lead and held it throughout, but also like Round 17, there was a wrench thrown into it. Instead of Lark falling to the ground, it was Himei, forced down by Noora. When Noora started raining punches down on Himei, Tallis, who had already been anxious the whole performance mouthing "something is wrong" promptly burst into silent tears, biting down on his fingers as Himei was hurt. The gunshot piercing Noora's neck almost seemed like a relief to him, making his teeth unclench from his flesh, dark bite marks left in their wake.

Eddy hated it.

That night, Tallis was utterly defeated, pale and shivering. He let Eddy clean his face, or maybe more accurately, he had no energy to resist it. He let them steal an extra blanket from an unoccupied room and put it on Tallis's bed.

Eddy watched over him that night, eyes fixated on his sleeping form, pierced by the familiar ache that came with connection.

Sebastian's pictures felt like they were burning against Eddy's leg where they rested in its pocket.

Not much more than a week later, Himei's long black curls were falling to the floor with each rhythmic snip of the scissors.

Daiki was dead. Himei had outlasted her. She won the stupid fucking game she was playing against herself.

But with every photoshoot and interview that came afterwards deeming Himei a member of the Elite Eight, declaring her better than Daiki, pitting her against Tov whose points count loomed ahead of her, Himei knew the truth.

Every time she glimpsed herself in the mirror and saw her bruised, sore face, she knew the truth.

Every time she laid eyes on Cirrus, whether in a magazine, on a billboard, or at mealtimes, she knew.

She didn't win.

She'd already lost, regardless of the outcome.

The morning of Round 24, she woke with a heavy heart.

She needed to see Tov.

Tagging time! Tov belongs to @ivanttakethis; Daiki belongs to @daiki1k; Sebastian belongs to @sotogalmo; Lark and Noora belong to @kamersona; Cirrus belongs to @cirrusoftheclouds. Everyone else is pretty much mentioned in passing, so I won't tag those people and spam their notifs, lol.

[milesdickpic]

His Little Girl | Bradley Bradshaw x Reader P. 73

Click here to see the master list

A/n: It's been a minute, huh Mav? Sorry for my absence, besties. There has been a lot going on. Thank you for all being patient with me. Without further ado, here is the next chapter! Thank you for being here! I love you all so much! ❤️ Happy reading and enjoy! 💕

Word Count: 3.5k

(sorry for all the grammatical errors, I did not re-read this 💀)

Warnings: cursing, crying, angst, anger, mentions death, panic attacks, talks about injuries, depression, TW: Blood in the picture below, if I missed any please let me know 🫶🏼

Please don't take my work, I will find you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(I really can't remember where I got this picture, I am sorry! 😭)

You sat up in a sweat. You were breathing hard. You had just woken up from a nightmare. You pushed your sweaty palms into your eyes. “It was just a dream.” You took a deep breath. Hangman came running into your room. 

“Y/n.” He was out of breath.

“Jake you’re home early from work. What are you doing here?” You looked at him concerned. 

“Where is Leia?” He looked around. 

“She’s with Evelyn and the girls. Jake what’s wrong?”

“Y/n.” 

You shook your head, “Jake." He looked down and blinked fast as his hands rested on his hips. He was lost for words. Your heart sped back up. "No you stop right now. What the hell happened?”Jake blew out an unsteady breath and shook his head. “He’s being flown back right now by the coast guard. Phantom and Phoenix are with him.” He came over to the bed and held your hands, “We need to go now.” He nodded.

Your heart fell to your stomach. You couldn’t breathe. Your chest was tight, “Is he okay?” Jake looked at you with a blank stare, “Is he alive Jake, please.” You pleaded with him. "Please..."

Jake held you tight, “I don’t know and I wish I did. All they said was that he was being taken to the hospital and that we needed to be there when they got there.”

You started to cry. You were trying to hold back your tears. You looked up and placed your hands on your head, “FUCK! JAKE! FUUUCK!” You started to sob. 

He hugged you tight, “He’s going to be okay. I know it. He’s Bradley Bradshaw. He always gets away with just a scratch.”

Jake helped you into the car. He called Evelyn and explained to her what happened, or at least what he knew. She agreed to keep Leia with her until you knew more about the situation. You arrived at the hospital, they brought you into a family waiting room. Hangman held you and comforted you the whole time as you waited. 

“Jake.” Your raspy voice whispered. 

“Yes, honey.” He rubbed your hack and kissed your head.

“I can’t do this without him.” You started to cry again. “I need him, Jake.” You started to shake as you cried. 

Jake pulled you into his embrace. “You won’t have to. I’ll make sure they do everything for him. I promise he will come home, honey.” He rubbed your hair and rocked you, “I promise.”

We sat in the family room for a couple of hours. Phantom finally emerged from the doors coming straight to you and Hangman. 

“Oh, Phantom!” You stood up quickly and hugged him. He held you tight.

“How are you, my dear?” He held you close and rubbed your back. 

You pulled back and wiped your eyes. You shook your head. “I just need to hear something. Please. Is he okay?” You pleaded with him. You just needed to know something and not be left in the dark. 

Phantom placed his hands on your shoulders. “My dear, I think we should sit.” 

You felt your heart fall. This wasn’t happening. You had just saw him yesterday. You had so much planned for when he came home… You tried to stay calm. It wasn’t just you feeling the pain, it was your boys too. You tried to steady your breathing. You sat down with Hangman again, Phantom sat in the chair next to you. Hangman wrapped his arm around you and comforted you. You held his hand and were shaking. Hangman pulled you closer to him and rubbed your shoulder. 

Phantom took a deep breath. “Bradley took the afternoon routes. Last week we had some issues with Bandits scaring our pilots by locking on them and triggering their tone buzzers to alert them. We noticed it would be an issue, so we changed protocols this week. Fly-out routes aren’t to be paired anymore, Instead, we sent out two leads and 4 supportive aircraft.”

You could feel Hangman tense against you. 

“Bradley was on a route with Phoenix, but then I had received a distress call from our other team. I requested for Bradley to meet with them. When he got there, they had been tagged with tone and didn’t know what to do in such situation. A lot of these pilots are new. Their first time being out there and not knowing all the ropes yet. Bradley took it upon himself to show leadership and sent phoenix away back to their original route with two supports. Bradley stayed back with the two who had tone on them. Take the lead.”

You dropped your head, “He always puts everyone before himself. That’s just Bradley.” 

Phantom leaned in and kissed your head, “He definitely gets that from his mother. She was the same exact way.”

You took a deep breath and looked back up at Phantom. 

“While they were flying, everything was fine. Then radio traffic came through. A lone Bandit was spotted, a second one coming opposite way started shooting. They took those down and more showed up. Phoenix and her team went to him as fast as they could. They were all being ambushed. One of the kids ran out of flares, He was panicking as a bandit was on his trails. Bradley cut him off and took the hit. All I could hear were Phoenix’s screams. They eliminated the rest of the bandits. We sent out a search and rescue team. They found him floating upright in the ocean. Thanks be to god for his floating devices. But he was hurt bad. Phoenix said as she watched him go down…” You stopped Phantom.

“Where is she?” Phantom looked at you with furrow brows. “Where is Phoenix?” Hangman sat up straight behind you. 

“She’s being evaluated. She’s really shaken up.” 

You rose to our feet. “I need to see her. I need to make sure she is okay, please.” 

Hangman stood up with you. “I’ll check on her, y/n. I’ll come back right away after I see her. I promise.” Hangman kissed your head and headed into the emergency room area. 

Phantom helped you sit back down. “Y/n. Are you sure you want to know?”

“I have to know. Please.” You begged with tears in your eyes. 

He nodded and held your hands, “Phoenix said as she watched him go down some debris from his plane came down and swiped his parachute. He was falling fast. The emergency chute deployed late. He hit the water hard. When they got to him he was bleeding out a lot. I’m guessing the debris went through the chute and knocked him as well.” He held your hands tight, “He was unconscious when we got to him. But they are doing everything they can to help him. He’s in surgery and they will update us as soon as they can.”

You broke down and buried your hands into your palms. “Phantom…” you sniffled and cried harder, “How am I supposed to tell my daughter. How am I supposed to tell her she might never see him again?”

He started to cry and put his head down. “Let’s hope and pray that will never have to come.” He cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead. “He’s a Bradshaw. He’s strong, He’s going to make it through.” Phantom pulled something from his pocket and handed it to you. They were very soggy pictures of you, Leia, and the boys. “They found those on him, clenched in his fist. You and your children are his strength and motivation. He’s going to make it back to you.” He caressed your cheeks and wiped your tears. “I’m not going anywhere until we have answers. Anything you need sweetheart, I am here. We are all here for you. The navy is here for you.” He pulled you into a hug. 

You nodded and held onto him tight. “Thank you so much, Phantom.”

An hour went by and you had fallen asleep on the couch in the waiting room. Hangman came back in the room and saw you asleep. He sighed of relief. “Thank god, her body needs rest after all this stress.” He let you sleep and when you finally woke up Hangman was sitting next to you rubbing your head. You got up and he rubbed your back. “I checked on Phoenix. She’s shaken up, bad. I’ve never in all the years knowing her, seen her like this.” 

“When can I see her?” Hangman pushed your hair from your face.

“Tomorrow.” He nodded. “I called Mav and Austin. They’ll be here in a couple of hours.” He cupped your cheek. 

“You called Mav?” You felt your heart drop. Oh god. You couldn’t imagine how he was feeling. First Goose and now Bradley? “Oh shit.” You squeezed your eyes shut.

“Hey, let me get you some water, honey. You need something in your system. What do you feel like eating?” Hangman rubbed your back. You shook your head. “No honey, you need to eat. Please. For the boys.” 

“Okay.” You said in a whisper. 

“I’ll bring you a sandwich and some water, okay?” Hangman kissed your head again before heading out of the room. 

You sat back in silence. Phantom was fast asleep on the couch across from you. You looked down at your belly and rubbed it. You closed your swollen eyes and focused on your breathing. Your body felt so numb. This had to be some nightmare, right? You’d wake up in your bed tomorrow and Bradley would be fine. You felt another tear slip from your eye and onto your cheek. Hangman came back and sat down next to you. You opened you eyes and looked at him with a weak smile. He was holding your sandwich to you. 

“Here, honey. You and the boys need to eat. Please.” You took the sandwich from Hangman and started to unwrap it. He placed your water next to you and he started to eat his sandwich. 

You laid your head on hangman’s shoulder as you ate. “He’s gonna be okay… Right Jake?” Your voice was solemn and raspy.

Hangman looked at you with sad eyes and sighed. He laid his head on yours and closed his eyes. “I know he will, y/n. He’s one of the strongest guys I know.” He kissed the top of your head. “I promise, I will make sure they do everything and anything for him.” 

You nodded against his shoulder and continued to slowly eat your food. 

A couple of hours had passed. You were laying on Hangman’s lap. You had a blanket draped over you. It was warm, but you felt so cold. Hangman was massaging your head. You were staring at the table in front of you, it was covered in magazines. You kept reading the Health magazine’s title over and over again. How to Overcome Anxiety.

The family’s waiting room door opened slightly. You and Hangman looked and saw the doctor coming in. You sat up quickly and Hangman helped you up. The doctor sighed and came to sit with you both. Hangman went to go and wake up Phantom. When he saw the doctor, he woke up quickly.

Once you all sat with the doctor they began to explain to you all what they did. 

“Mrs. Bradshaw, we had to staple and stitch up a gauge in your husband's shoulder. He had lost a significant amount of blood, but we were able to put 3 bags in him. We also had to go in and place a plate and a couple of screws in his left clavicle, it was broken into several pieces. We have him in a neck brace, just to keep him steady. His vertebrae were stressed, but we saw no damage to the spinal cord or vertebrae. He has a couple of broken ribs from the impact when he hit the water. We also had to stitch his thigh. We are assuming the debris that came down and hit his shoulder went right across and cut open his thigh as well. Thankfully, other than that. He just has some minor cuts, abrasions, bumps, and bruises. It could have been a lot worse, but thanks be to god it isn’t.” He placed his hand on your arm. 

You started to cry softly. You were thankful that there weren’t more complications. Especially after you had heard what happened to him. You were preparing for the worst. You placed your hand on the doctor’s hand. “Thank you so much.” You shook you head and patted his hand, “Thank you so much, doctor.” You looked up at him and gave him a hug.

He rubbed your back, “Of course. We will do anything to make sure he’s okay, Mrs. Bradshaw.”

You pulled back and wiped your face. “When can we see him?”

“You can come back and see him now. I must forewarn you. We do have him in a medically induced coma. We just want to give him time to rest and have his body heal before we have him up. He will be in a lot of pain, so we thought this would suit him best.” 

You nodded, “Can I please see my husband?” 

“Of course. You can all follow me.” 

You stood up and Hangman helped you up. He had his hand on your back and the other holding your hand to help steady you. He walked with you through the halls to Bradley’s room. Phantom branched off and went to go and check on Phoenix. 

“Lieutenant Bradshaw’s room. You are both welcomed to stay here.” The doctor opened the door. The curtain was covering Bradley, but you could hear all the beeping from the machines and monitors. The doctor opened the curtain and the sight in front of you nearly had you fall to your knees. Thankfully, Hangman was there holding onto you. 

“Holy shit…” You started to feel weak.

“Honey.” Hangman grabbed onto you. The doctor grabbed a chair and him and Hangman helped you into it. 

Your breathing was slow. Your heart wrenched in your chest. Your vision became blurry as you began to tear up. This wasn’t your Bradley. There had to have been some mistake. He was hooked up to so many machines. There was a tube going into his mouth and down into his throat to breathe for him. He was in a neck brace, his shoulder patched up, arm in a sling, he was swollen, had slight lacerations on his face, arms, neck, he had bruises, his thighs was bandaged up, his eyes still being held shut with medical tape, he had so many wires hook up to him to minter his oxygen, heart rate, blood pressure. There was no way this was him. You had just saw him no less than 48 hours ago. He was fine, laughing, giving you, your daughter, sons, and puppy good-bye kisses and hugs. This wasn’t your Bradley, you had no idea who this was. 

Hangman walked over to Bradley’s side and placed his hand on his hair. He leaned down and kissed his forehead. “We’re here, Rooster. Y/n and I are here. We’re not going anywhere, bro. We are staying here with you. I promise to take care of her in the mean time. I love you, Roo.” He laid his head face down next to Bradley’s. You could hear him crying quietly as he hugged Bradley. “Damn it, Bradshaw. What were you thinking. You put everyone before yourself.” Hangman sobbed into the side of Bradley. “Fuck man, we need you.” He was shaking slightly as he pleased with Bradley. 

You called over to Hangman in a shake voice, “Jake…” He got up and looked at you with red tearful eyes. You gestured for him to come to you. He came over and pulled up a chair next to you. You pulled him into a hug and held his head to your head, “He’ll be okay. Remember what you said? He’s Bradley, he’s going to come out of it.” 

Hangman chuckled and kissed your cheek, “You’re right. You are absolutely right, y/n.” He smiled at you and wiped his tears. 

You looked at Bradley on the bed, “Do you think he’ll fly again, Jake?” 

Hangman looked over at Bradley laying on the bed. “I really don’t know, but I sure hope he can. He’s damn good at it.” Hangman sighed. “So fucking good at it. I know for a fact that he would have beat my ass if we were in the same class for Top Gun.” He looked at you and chuckled, “But don’t tell him I told you that. He’ll never let me live it down.”

You giggled and wrapped your arm around his shoulders, “Your secret is safe with me, Jake.” You patted his shoulder. You started to stand up. Hangman helped you up, “I’m going to go and get fresh air. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Jake nodded, “Do you want me to come with you?” 

You shook your head, “Stay here with Brad. In case anything happens.” You smiled weakly at Hangman.

He stood up and gave you a hug, “Call me if you need anything.” 

You started to walk around. You made your way outside the front entrance of the hospital. You stood there with your hands on your hips. You ricked your hips forward and back to stretch your body out. The breeze felt good against you, it helped open up your tight chest. It felt so good to be able t to finally breathe. You turned around to walk back inside the hospital. But, before you could you could hear someone calling for you. You looked over your shoulder. You saw Mav and Austin running over to you. 

Mav comes running over to you. “Hey, sweetheart.” Mav’s face was full of hurt, concern, and guilt. He had his arms out to hug you. You turned around, super pregnant Mav’s eyes went wide. He looked down at your belly and had his arms out. “ Sweetheart…Are you pregnant?!” 

You laughed weakly and held your arms out. You started to break down crying “Surprise.” You dropped your head down into your hands. Mav pulled you in for a hug. He hugged you tightly.

“Sweetheart. God you look so beautiful! Congratulations!” He kissed your cheek over and over again. “Oh my gosh, sweetheart! This is so exciting and surprising! Why didn’t you tell me?” He placed his hands on your belly.

You chuckled and watched as he looked at your belly in amazement. “We wanted to surprise you. We hadn’t told anyone yet… Well besides Austin, Hangman, and Phoenix.” Mav looked at Austin with wide eyes.

“You knew before I did!” He chuckled.

Austin shrugged, “I promised I wouldn’t say anything.” Austin leaned in and kissed your cheek. “You look amazing, darlin.” 

You smiled at the both of them. “Thank you.”

“So, how is he doing, sweetheart?” Mav stood up straight and looked at you while blowing out a worried unsteady breath. He placed his hands on his hips. 

“He finished surgery 30 minutes ago. The doctor came to Hangman, Phantom, and I and explained the procedure. He has a lot of bumps, scratches, and bruises. He had to have a plate and screws put into his clavicle, it was broken into several pieces. There was some debris that cut a gauge into his shoulder that they had stapled and stitched up. He had some stitches put into his thigh from a cut. He has a couple broken ribs, he’s in a neck brace for stability, but no damage to vertebrae or spinal cord. They said he did lose a significant amount of blood so they transfused 3 bags into him.” You sighed, “But from what happened, they said it could have been a lot worse.”

Mav nodded and pulled you in for a hug, “I am so glad he is going to be okay. He has a long road to recovery, but he’s a Bradshaw. He’s going to be okay, sweetheart.” Mav placed a hard kiss to your temple. 

Austin came and gave you.a hug and kiss on the head, “He’s right. He’ll be okay, darlin.”

“What’s he doing now? Is he still asleep from the anesthetic?” Mav furrowed his brows. 

You shook your head, “They actually have him in a medically induced coma. They want his body to heal some, before they wake him up. They said he’d be in a lot of pain, so this was the best way for him to rest and recuperate.” You sighed. 

Mav gulped, “I am so sorry, y/n. I know his is so hard, sweetheart.” Mav gave you another hug. “But that’s really good that they went ahead and did that for him.” Mav rubbed your back and rested his chin on your shoulder.

You started to cry in May’s embrace. “I know, but I could have lost him. You could have lost him. Leia, the boys, everyone.”  You sniffled and held onto Mav tight. 

Mav let out a sigh, “I know, honey, but we didn’t he is still here, my love.”  

You laid your head to his, “I know and I’m trying to be so strong for him and the kids.”

Mav pulled you in closer to him, “And you are doing a great job of it, sweetheart. You are doing so good.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Keep the faith strong for our daddy Brad. ❤️ "He's Bradley Bradshaw. He always just walks away with a couple of bumps and bruises." "He's a Bradshaw." I'll see you in the next chapter, babes! ❤️

My support group is in the comments 🫶🏼