#i am shit
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Was my singing really shit?
Yes
Will I keep trying because I won't get better any other way?
Yes
#You won't always be good at something first try#i've learned my lesson#i want to sing#i am shit#i will practice though :D
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Watching wieiads is so much better than thinspo personally., it makes me realise how weak i am. I dont have the willpower to fast for over 3 days, and thats pathetic, but im gonna try to get to 42kg by november so i look better when im outside
Im a little sad theres no winter here so i wont be able to get that pretty skinny winter aesthetic.. but at least even if my face is ugly i'll have thinner legs.
Height: 157.8cm
Sw: 59.5kg
Cw: 44.1kg
Gw: 42kg
Ugw: 35kg
And i cant start tomorrow. It starts now!! :3
#tw ana bløg#tw ed ana#tw ana rant#fat bitch#im fat and ugly#fatass#pathetic loser#shitpost#I am shit#i wanna kms#4nor3xia#4norexla#4n4blr#4n@diary#4n4rexia
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complain that im bored
when being bored is a privilege
act like im suffering
theres no suffering in this
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Need someone to flirt with me daily 🥺🥺🥺🥺
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I fucked up the library thing
#astral writes#I reserved my holiday reading books#it expired by the time I got there#so I had to do it again#this time I reserved it to my local library#not the one at the high street#I should collect it hopefully by Friday#i am shit
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Some random Crywank concert highlights <3
#crywank#jay crywank#jay clayton#james clayton#just a snail#screaming#the story of the lizard and the sock#privately owned spiral galaxy#i am shit#tomorrow is nearly yesterday and everyday is stupid#egg on face
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Somebody in headspace:
Tommy, there’s only so many times you can listen to “I Am Shit” you’re going to get sick of it (this is paraphrased like. I felt them thjnk it? Or say it? Didn’t actually hear it though but ik someone said it.)
My headphones (literally for an hour and counting): I am shit, I am shit, neh neh neh neh…
Ok but in my defense that neh neh neh part scratches my brain.
#tommyinnit fictive#osdd host#osdd system#dsmp tommy fictive#dsmp fictive#crywank#i am shit#i am shit crywank
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Man, I am a piece of shit.
I just got a year older. Ahhhh....
I want be a child. A baby .
No exams. Just sleep
Crying because of growing up
Help Help Help ......
Bye people 👋
#i am shit#oh fuck#today is my birthday#why am i alive#oh my god#what is happening#this is a crisis#for me#i wanna die#help lol#im cryin#ahhhhh#humans are weird#i need sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep#probably
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ENTRY LEVEL MEANS NO EXPERIENCE. IT MEANS NO PORTFOLIO OF RELEVANT SAMPLES. ENTRY LEVEL IS ENTRY LEVEL
#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GAIN EXPERIENCE YOU STUPID FUCKS#I HATE THIS I HATE JOB HUNTING THIS SYSTEM IS ABSOLUTE DOG SHIT
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today in church one of the priests referred to trans people as "those who are growing into the gender they were called to be" and i'm kind of enjoying the idea of like....divinely ordained top surgery
#if god thinks i should get top surgery he needs to venmo me $9000 usd#there was someone in the gay social hour who said she had gotten kicked out of multiple catholic churches (for being trans)#and her therapist recommended this church specifically....#going into affirming churches still makes me a little emotional if i am being fully honest. if you have an affirming religious space#i hope you can hold onto that shit with your life#anyway. charming way to think about it i like it more than the bread and wine one personally#me#edit: to clarify this was at an episcopalian church
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I think people should be allowed to sleep in the same bed in a non sexual and non romantic way. I think cuddles can happen non sexually and non romantically. I think most acts of affection are non sexual and non romantic until you make it sexual or romantic (other than the obvious things like actual sex is sexual)
#arospec#aspec#aromantic#asexual#5k#6k#7k#wtf why do you like this post so much#8k#wtf#WHY DO YOU LIKE THIS POST SO MUCH#WHY DO YOU LIKE THIS SHIT I POSTED AT TWO AM WHILE SLEEP DEPRIVED#LIKE I'M THANKFUL AND ALL BUT WHY#most of the tags are edits/additions#9k#whyy#10k
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One Piece final battle
poorly drawn extra:
#one piece#mihawk#dracule mihawk#one piece mihawk#akagami no shanks#shanks#red haired shanks#mishanks#akataka#redhawk#monkey d luffy#monkey d. luffy#one piece luffy#luffy#straw hat luffy#one piece fanart#roronoa zoro#zoro#one piece zoro#ronoroa zoro#zoro one piece#one piece art#one piece comic#sorry for another shit post comic ndjaksndjkas#i saw a b99 meme that was basicaly the first page of this comic and i had to do it#i wish i had made a final version with good linework etc but i actually have to work on the comics i am being paid to make#not ANOTHER shitpost for one piece ndjkasndjkas#and drawing mihawk's den den mushi sure was an experience#ugly ass thing lol
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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Rowling isn't denying holocaust. She just pointed out that burning of transgender health books is a lie as that form of cosmetic surgery didn't exist. But of course you knew that already, didn't you?
I was thinking I'd probably see one of you! You're wrong :) Let's review the history a bit, shall we?
In this case, what we're talking about is the Institut für Sexualwissenschaft, or in English, The Institute of Sexology. This Institute was founded and headed by a gay Jewish sexologist named Magnus Hirschfeld. It was founded in July of 1919 as the first sexology research clinic in the world, and was run as a private, non-profit clinic. Hirschfeld and the researchers who worked there would give out consultations, medical advice, and even treatments for free to their poorer clientele, as well as give thousands of lectures and build a unique library full of books on gender, sexuality, and eroticism. Of course, being a gay man, Hirschfeld focused a lot on the gay community and proving that homosexuality was natural and could not be "cured".
Hirschfeld was unique in his time because he believed that nobody's gender was either one or the other. Rather, he contended that everyone is a mixture of both male and female, with every individual having their own unique mix of traits.
This leads into the Institute's work with transgender patients. Hirschfeld was actually the one to coin the term "transsexual" in 1923, though this word didn't become popular phrasing until 30 years later when Harry Benjamin began expanding his research (I'll just be shortening it to trans for this brief overview.) For the Institute, their revolutionary work with gay men eventually began to attract other members of the LGBTA+, including of course trans people.
Contrary to what Anon says, sex reassignment surgery was first tested in 1912. It'd already being used on humans throughout Europe during the 1920's by the time a doctor at the Institute named Ludwig Levy-Lenz began performing it on patients in 1931. Hirschfeld was at first opposed, but he came around quickly because it lowered the rate of suicide among their trans patients. Not only was reassignment performed at the Institute, but both facial feminization and facial masculization surgery were also done.
The Institute employed some of these patients, gave them therapy to help with other issues, even gave some of the mentioned surgeries for free to this who could not afford it! They spoke out on their behalf to the public, even getting Berlin police to help them create "transvestite passes" to allow people to dress however they wanted without the threat of being arrested. They worked together to fight the law, including trying to strike down Paragraph 175, which made it illegal to be homosexual. The picture below is from their holiday party, Magnus Hirschfeld being the gentleman on the right with the fabulous mustache. Many of the other people in this photo are transgender.
[Image ID: A black and white photo of a group of people. Some are smiling at the camera, others have serious expressions. Either way, they all seem to be happy. On the right side, an older gentleman in glasses- Magnus Hirschfeld- is sitting. He has short hair and a bushy mustache. He is resting one hand on the shoulder of the person in front of him. His other hand is being held by a person to his left. Another person to his right is holding his shoulder.]
There was always push back against the Institute, especially from conservatives who saw all of this as a bad thing. But conservatism can't stop progress without destroying it. They weren't willing to go that far for a good while. It all ended in March of 1933, when a new Chancellor was elected. The Nazis did not like homosexuals for several reasons. Chief among them, we break the boundaries of "normal" society. Shortly after the election, on May 6th, the book burnings began. The Jewish, gay, and obviously liberal Magnus Hirschfeld and his library of boundary-breaking literature was one of the very first targets. Thankfully, Hirschfeld was spared by virtue of being in Paris at the time (he would die in 1935, before the Nazis were able to invade France). His library wasn't so lucky.
This famous picture of the book burnings was taken after the Institute of Sexology had been raided. That's their books. Literature on so much about sexuality, eroticism, and gender, yes including their new work on trans people. This is the trans community's Alexandria. We're incredibly lucky that enough of it survived for Harry Benjamin and everyone who came after him was able to build on the Institute's work.
[Image ID: A black and white photo of the May Nazi book burning of the Institute of Sexology's library. A soldier, back facing the camera, is throwing a stack of books into the fire. In the background of the right side, a crowd is watching.]
As the Holocaust went on, the homosexuals of Germany became a targeted group. This did include transgender people, no matter what you say. To deny this reality is Holocaust denial. JK Rowling and everyone else who tries to pretend like this isn't reality is participating in that evil. You're agreeing with the Nazis.
But of course, you knew that already, didn't you?
Edit: Added image IDs. I apologize to those using screen readers for forgetting them. Please reblog this version instead.
#transgender#trans history#transsexual#transphobia#Magnus Hirschfeld#holocaust#holocaust denial#book burning#j.k. rowling#jk rowling#just in case you missed what i mean by all this: go fuck yourself anon :)#trans people have always existed#and we will always exist#if you really wanna pick a fight with me over well-documented history then you better bring in some sources to back your shit#queer history#queer#lgbt+#lgbta+#lgbt#lgbt history#edit: i finally got around to those damn image IDs. i am so very sorry for totally forgetting that's my bimbo moment of the month#also real quick i thought about adding an image of the actual building but the only one i can find has a Nazi parade in front of it#it was taken the day of the book burning raid and honestly if i were to include it then i'd add it to the first few paragraphs#and i think the story's better told when you uphold the hope Magnus Hirschfeld and all the researchers he worked with had#also keeps being brought up: yes Hirschfeld was a eugenicist. it was a popular belief set that was only discredited after WW2#Hirschfeld died in 1935. he literally didn't live long enough to see science turn against those beliefs and practices#considering how he changed his mind on transitions i like to think he would've changed his mind on eugenics too if he'd lived
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i would say that, mentally speaking, i'm in a good place right now! physically of course, the crows continue their chanting,
#'weaving spells with beaks and talons' whatever u wanna call it. sounds like chanting to me#anyway yes. that is a thing that is happening#yes i am aware of it. stop asking.#am i taking steps to stop this thing from happening? how. how the fuck do u suppose i should go about doing that?#yea i've done some dumb shit in my life#no i am NOT about to go INTERFERING with the CROWS
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i am going to wake up from this nap on time feeling refreshed and not any worse than I do at this current time
#putting it out into the universe see u in 30 minutes ✌🏻#i have so much shit to do but i am sleepy 😔
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