#i am never drawing alice again (this is a lie i definitely will. i love him too much not to. even if i hate drawing his outfit.)

[eveningrainstorm]

prisoner

[leechonspeeddial]

Midnight Shift: The Serpent at Burger King - A Seduction of Kevins Summary: The Devil comes disguised as everything you want, Alice Cullen comes with fondue fountains and Bugattis. wc: 1.7k Read on ao3

There was one simple lesson I learned from a young age and quickly internalized while living as a Cullen.

Never play chess with a psychic.

You think a mind reader is a problem? No, you just have to add on geographical distance and then you're back on an equal playing field; as long as you keep apart, you can use your best strategies and winning is still possible. A psychic though, there is no distance you can go to be hidden from their sight. Once they get their teeth in you, your odds at winning are – for a lack of a better word – shit. So, as I held Alice's gaze at our local Burger King, I reminded myself this one very important rule.

Never play chess with a psychic.

Too late.

If you did find yourself playing chess with a psychic, the best course of action would be to become irrational and flip the board. You might not win, but neither would they and you'd save yourself the effort. I took a deep breath and assessed the situation. There were currently five humans with ten pairs of working human eyes at the restaurant; flipping the board would be disastrous, either people would die or they'd bear witness to vampiric activity. So that's out of the question, next strat.

Though Alice had gotten used to reading around the blind spots caused by me, she hadn't totally mastered it yet. My best choice was to act without thinking and take over the conversation as much as possible. That, well, that I could manage no problem.

"Well, well, well. What do you have to say for yourself, Mr. Assistant Manager?" I addressed Gay Kevin, hoping to also neutralize Jasper. Mr. Emotional Roofie was another obstacle here, trying to goad my coworkers so that they emotionally overwhelm him was my best shot. "Showing up two hours late to your shift with no warning?"

Gay Kevin looked exhausted.

"Please, not in front of the customers," he sounded embarrassed. Not Kevin snorted and took the interruption as an opportunity to make Milkshake boy his drink and get away from Alice. Meanwhile, Straight Kevin hopped over the counter and directly headed towards the old fries – if we didn't do our duty to eat them, they would be thrown out.

I also took notice of the guy that came in with the Kevins; he was shorter than Gay Kevin but slightly taller than Straight Kevin, he had thick black hair, but more importantly, he carried a video camera with him. He observed us, brown eyes full of amusement, and I sincerely hoped he was a vlogger.

"They aren't customers," I chirped with a predatory smile.

"I am a one though," Milkshake boy frowned. I waved him off.

"You're Not Kevin adjacent. You don't count," Gay Kevin looked increasingly irritated despite Jasper's attempt at giving chill vibes. He crossed his arms.

"So, what's this? You decide to throw a party while I was gone?"

I was about to retort when Alice interrupted me. I glared.

"There IS a party involved, but not here and not right now. Alice Cullen, nice to meet you, I'm –"

"Resentment's sister," Alice scrunched up her nose but nodded.

"Yup! And I came here to personally invite you, other Kevin, and Not Kevin to Nessie's party"

"You said you were born on 9/11," Straight Kevin's said accusingly with a mouth full of fries.

"It's not a birthday party," Alice tried to clarify, only to be drowned out by Not Kevin.

"You were born on 9/11?" I turned to address him and realized he was making Milkshake boy a chocolate shake, ruining all the hard work I put into my performance. Today was definitely not my day.

"I mean, yeah, but not like 9/11 9/11. I'm only 16," Not Kevin nodded but then his eyes widened as a realization seemed to hit him.

"Oh fuck. I forgot that was 20 years ago…"

"I wasn't even born 20 years ago," Straight Kevin added and it seemed to act as a punch to Not Kevin's gut.

"God, you guys are babies. I remember my parents picking me up from kindergarten early and being glued to the news for the rest of the day," Gay Kevin's statement also appeared to have a negative effect on Not Kevin, making him look even more miserable. Camera man looked like there was no place he rather be. Alice, well, she looked endlessly irritated.

"I feel so old" Not Kevin whispered, shell-shocked.

"You are old. What are you, like 50?" Not Kevin glared at me.

"What's 9/11?"

I blinked. Everyone went quiet and stared at Milkshake boy, who looked very confused. No one spoke for a full beat.

"Jack's 19 and, uh, Canadian," Not Kevin shrugged helplessly and said as if that explained everything. He handed the kid his milkshake.

"Hey, I thought there weren't any Oreos –"

"ANYWAY," Alice said loudly and we all looked at her, "it's not a birthday party. It's more like a celebration of Nessie's first job. Our family would love to have all of you for dinner"

"She means that we'd love to have you at the event. Not that we want to eat you for dinner," Jasper added unnecessarily and made me want to face palm. So, I did.

"I wasn't worried about possible cannibalism when she said it, but now I am," Straight Kevin took a wary step away from Jasper. Alice rolled her eyes.

"There will be plenty of free food and you can take as many leftovers as you want with you," Straight Kevin seemed to seriously consider this.

"I'm in," Alice handed him a pink envelope and smiled. Fuck.

Improvise.

"Speaking of customers. We have one right now," I pointed at Camera man, "so we can't deal with you right now," I tried to push Alice out the store but she held her ground.

"I'm also not a customer," he shrugged, "I came for the rats"

Shit.

"Tài…don't do this" Gay Kevin pleaded.

"My hands are tied. I promised my audience," so he was some sort of vlogger. This was admittedly the only good thing that has happened today.

"See, he's not a customer. I can stay," I groaned at Alice's smug tone.

"Technically, you're both loitering. So, neither of you should stay"

"I agree with the Assistant Manager"

Alice and I stared down at each other while Camera man and Gay Kevin had a silent conversation with their eyes. For the next while, the only sounds that could be heard in the restaurant were Straight Kevin loudly chewing, Milkshake boy slurping, and Olivia Rodrigo's drivers license playing on the speakers.

Suddenly, Not Kevin snapped his fingers, drawing our attention to him.

"You know, it occurs to me that since both Kevins are finally here, I can take my break. Come on Jack, I'm taking you home," he quickly made his way around the counter and grabbed Milkshake boy. "I'll make sure to call if I'm somehow two hours late," I smirked at Alice as her eyes narrowed. I greatly encouraged any action that made her look like that.

Milkshake boy tilted his head and didn't let himself be dragged out of the joint. I had half a mind to help Not Kevin.

"But dad said to –"

"Your dad will be ok with this as long as you don't set the house on fire. Again" Milkshake boy frowned.

"It happened once. I said I was sorry"

"Yeah, yeah. Come on bud, time's ticking"

Finally, that seemed to get Milkshake boy moving and heading to the door.

"Don't forget your invite!" Alice called out.

"We're good," Not Kevin responded with a hand on the door and the other pulling the teen along.

"Did I mention there will be a fondue fountain?"

Not Kevin hesitated by the door and I could only feel horror as my stomach dropped. Not Kevin was weak for cheese and cheese related by-products.

"Chocolate or cheese?"

"Both," I held my breath. It wasn't fair, it wasn't fucking fair.

"Shame, I'm on a diet"

"You aren't –"

And they were both gone before Milkshake boy could finish calling out Not Kevin's blatant lie. I fist bumped the air and stuck my tongue out at Alice, fully intending to gloat over this minor victory.

That is, until I saw Alice smiling.

Fucking psychics.

"What's got you so smug," I snarked, hoping to get a hint of whatever vision she just had. She smirked and I could tell she could see right through me. So much for not playing chess with psychic.

"I had a sudden revelation that everything will be alright," her eyes twinkled with mischief and, not for the first time, I was very jealous of Edward. Why the fuck did he get the mind reading powers? Tactile thought projection was so stupid and useless the majority of the time.

"You're so fucking annoying"

"I prefer the term persistent," I'd prefer if she was set on fire. "Which reminds me, hey boys"

Camera man and Gay Kevin stopped doing whatever the hell they were doing and paid attention to Alice, who was holding up one her dumb little pink envelopes.

"What do you say, a chance to eat fancy rich people food and see some fancy rich people cars," Camera man turned to Gay Kevin.

"Babe"

"Is this like, appropriate. Professionally speaking," Gay Kevin scrunched up his nose trying to figure out the etiquette of this weird ass situation.

"I'm more than happy to take you guys on a spin in my brand-new Bugatti"

"Babe"

"Why does this feel like bribery?" Gay Kevin narrowed his eyes at Alice, he seemed incredibly suspicious.

"Because it is," I growled and attempted to set Alice on fire with my stare.

"And I fully admit it. I just want to throw a good party, and guest are a very important part," she stretched out her hand towards Camera man, "think about it, that's all I ask"

Camera man and Gay Kevin shared a look, and Camera man grabbed the envelope. Ugh.

"Wonderful! Remember to R.S.V.P., we'll leave you to it," she waved and grabbed Confederate hubby.

They walked away and I could hear Alice speak, her voice far too low for human ears, but just the right volume for me.

"There's been a change of plans, we're meeting up Esme"

I scowled. I knew it was bait, I knew Alice wanted me to hear her, and it was driving me insane. Why would they need to see Esme? Why would Alice want me to know this?

I fucking hated my life.

[goldeneyedgirl]

2020 Fic Meme

It happens every year like clockwork. The Fic Round-Up Meme. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to it this year because I’ve written so much. As usual, compiled from ancient Livejournal fic memes. I like doing it as kind of a time capsule of my writing. If anyone else wants to take a crack, feel free. I love reading writers’ throughs on their own work. <3 No tagging because that is PRESSURE. 

Twilight

12 Days of Fic-Mas (Twilight, WIP) Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 + Christmas Eve Twelve days of fic extracts, previews, and drabbles focusing on Alice Cullen and Jess/Jasper Hale: Anathema, the KidFic, Married in Vegas, Daemons, Memento Vivere, Human Alice Kills James, Jess and Alice do Prom, Forgotten, Vampires in Vegas, Shadow to Light Missing Scene, Hybrid, Cowboys and Angel Solstice, and All These Broken Things

Afterglow (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G)  There were three things of which she was certain. The first was that her name was Alice. The second was that she was born an angel. And three, she was getting ready to die.

Against a Wall (Alice/Jasper, Human/Vampire AU, Romance, Angst, PG) If you asked anyone with the surname ‘Whitlock’, they’d tell you that the family was cursed. It was the Whitlock Curse to blame the day the bank took the ranch away from Jasper’s own father.      

And Found (Alice/Jasper, Soulmark AU, Romance, PG) The soul mark appears when Alice is six. It is a twisted ribbon of a mark, from the inside of her left elbow, up her arm, over her shoulder, along her clavicle, over her right shoulder and down to her right wrist. What ugly, soulless individual could inspire such a mark?

Jar of Hearts Pt 1 Pt 2 (WIP) (Alice, Emmett, Seth, MCU xover, Angst, PG) The snap came for everyone - “He said he’d never leave me,” she says in a wobbly voice. “He promised me.”“It wasn’t by choice,” Emmett rushes to tell her. “You were his last thought; he tried so hard to get home before he…”

Never a Question (Alice/Jasper, AU, Angst, G)  Carlisle is quite sure that he’s watching his son’s heart break into a million pieces as he stares at his human mate, slowly dying alone, not a single person allowed to hold her hand.

Hand in Hand (Alice/Jasper, AU, Fluff, G)  “Never,” he swears, pressing a kiss to her cheek that makes her beam -  “There’s not a single moment I can think of that cannot be improved by your presence, darlin’.”

Love & Duty (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G)  A trainee witch is sent to treat a wounded cowboy from her brother coven. 

Shadow to Light (WIP) (Alice/Jasper, AU Angst, PG) In 1918, Jasper lures the newborn known as Mary-Alice back to Monterrey. He is lost to her before it even begins. (Ch 6-8)

The Way of Things (Alice/Jasper, AU, Drama, M)  She truly doesn’t know what comes next. He truly doesn’t know if it will be good or bad. They will live this life for as long as it lasts, long may it last, surrounded by the people they love and trust. 

What You Say (Alice/Jessamine, Canon, Angst, M)  Edward might have thought Aro was their reckoning, but Alice knows for her, it is Jessamine’s hurt.

Total number of completed stories: ELEVEN. 

Total word count: 90,155 words were formally posted - not including snippets, previews (aside from FicMas) or anything that was shared on the Discord server. 

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? I fucking nailed it. Like, seriously. THREE chapters of Shadow to Light? Every single day of JaliceWeek AND FicMas? I mean, I think the lockdown definitely helped with free time, and not going to lie, the iOS shutdown of Fortnite probably assisted my productivity. 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? The Discord has so much to answer for. I wrote porn. Like, what. What. What. What. I find this bizarre and did not have ‘let’s just go full NC17 in 2020′ on my bingo card, but it happened. In fact, 2019 Lexie has just gone full spit-take and yelled, “WHAT?!” at the top of her lungs. 

And to make it more surprising, it’s both het and f/f porn. Like, mind-blown. Who am I anymore?

What’s your own favourite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest? The Way of Things, What You Say, And Found, & Afterglow. All fics that came together really well, that felt like *me*, and had hopeful endings. I’m really proud of them. 

STL doesn’t get an opportunity to be apart of this til it’s finished. 

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? The porn. 

Apparently, I can write it. Who knew? 

I definitely threw caution to the wind with JaliceWeek and just went for whatever crossed my mind and stopped worrying so much. Like, whatever, this is what I want to write so I will. I mean, the MCU crossover is happening in a slightly more obscure way than I initially envisaged it, it’s definitely a better fic for it.

I joined the Discord, and that’s been amazing. I’ve spent my last few fandoms existing in kind of a vacuum because of bad experiences and the fact I’m usually doing something niche, so having people to talk to who are so nice and welcoming and are happy to ignore my special brand of obnoxiousness is so lovely and has had such a good affect on my mental health. Sometimes you need people you can be your dorkiest self with. 

My instincts are pretty good as far as fic goes, people are awesome, and I can write sex scenes. It’s been a learning curve, let me tell you that. 

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the New Year?  I have to balance grad school, my business, and my writing, so that’s going to be interesting. I think I need to look at my fic more as downtime than a high-stress ‘job’ because I LOVE writing it. I love writing. I love reading. But I get in my own head and overthink. So my goals are BALANCE and RELAX. 

My best story of this year: Oh man, that’s not something I can judge. I am so incredibly proud of how Afterglow, And Found, and The Way of Things turned out. Especially considering I was so behind with JaliceWeek, and I think I was putting out a fic a day, and freaking out because I was lacking ideas, so when these three just came together exactly how I wanted them, it was a good moment. 

My most popular story: Shadow to Light. Look, if that’s my legacy to fandom, I’ve done pretty damn well. I’m really, really appreciative of how enthusiastic people are about this ‘verse. I don’t always understand it, because I can see how my writing has changed and how the story has evolved massively (first it was supposed to be a one-shot, then five chapters.) I hope that it ends up being satisfying for everyone because I have LOVED writing it, even if I am slower than molasses. 

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Everyone is always so damn enthusiastic about my writing. I think maybe Hybrid is kind of a big question mark for everyone at the moment because there are so many questions and no answers yet. 

And any of the Jessamine/Alice. That’s a new niche, I get not everyone is into it. But it’s happening and will continue into 2020.

Most fun story to write:  What You Say or Jess and Alice at Prom. Jess is a little snarkier than Jasper, less controlled, and the girls are super fun to write, even high-tension scenes. 

Most Sexy Story: Oh, I can answer this now! Um, maybe The Way of Things or Jess and Alice at Prom? Yup, those are my picks. 

Story with the single sexiest moment:  The Way of Things. This happened before the Discord Intervention, and I’m genuinely not sure if I’m happy with the end of the Prom fic, so it might be reworked slightly in the future. But The Way of Things I was really happy with because it covered so many ideas I had in a way that fit together well. 

That’s where she makes good on her unspoken promises from aeons again, of their private victory celebration. She sits astride him, her hips rolling hard against his, drawing out his groans and growls as he grips her thighs almost tight enough to crack. Their gazes are locked the entire time, her tongue skimming over her lips, as she lets her emotions tell him everything that she wants and everything she plans to take.

He remembers fucking her in the dirt in Dacia; his mouth between her legs as she hollered obscenities in a Paris attic; and the urgent, passionate loving-making of a marriage finally consummated.

She remembers bloody emeralds looped around her throat and resting between her breasts as she gets down on her knees and takes him into her mouth, his fingers tangled in her hair; the delicious weight of him on top of her, their sweat mingling and cooling in the frozen night as their flimsy bed creaked against the wall; and his soft encouragement in her ear as he grasps her around the waist, their hands resting together on the gentle swell of her stomach. 

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: I think I restrained myself from anything too dark or twisted this year, actually. Oh, wait, Vampires in Vegas. That one has some pretty dark implications about Alice’s life, about the vampire underworld, and Jasper’s behaviour, especially as it goes one. No fic that deals with someone being put into sex work without educated consent is going to avoid being dark, and I think it’s logical that vampires would have their hands in a lot of illegal yet profitable areas. 

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: Anything with Jessamine/Alice because, like, Jess isn’t a name-swap of Jasper, and the relationship dynamic shifts with the slight personality shifts. And then you have to consider the family and social dynamic of two women in the relationship, so working all that out was fun. 

Jar of Hearts is another one, because I had to work out who the fic was going to follow and what was lost. And Emmett and Alice pretty much don’t interact in canon, but they were chosen for a reason. I’ve stripped them down to their worst, most isolated selves without their ‘true north’ (Rose and Jasper) or their moral center (Carlisle and Esme), or even their secret weapon (Edward). Seth, too, has been isolated from his family and friends, and is especially ‘other’ in this situation. This is an MCU crossover, so we’re kind of following a heroes’ journey with the last of Forks’ supernatural creatures.

Hardest story to write: Shadow to Light because of the way I have to use language, because of the plot strands from canon when I hate writing canon material, and how the characters have changed and how this new version reflects the old version. 

Against a Wall, as well, because of the in-verse time crunch I had - I needed Jasper damaged, military-minded, and changed by age 19. And I needed the boy broken. I’m happy with it, the story is done and dusted, but it didn’t quite turn out how I planned. And that’s okay, because I like this version. But I think I tackled something a lot bigger than I anticipated with it. 

Most disappointing:  Look, I love the verse and the set-up, but I think Love & Duty could do with another 2k words for build-up. I just ran out of time, honestly, to build up that mutual attraction between Alice and Jasper. 

Easiest story to write: Anathema, because Alice’s voice was so clear in it. Anathema!Alice knows exactly who she is, and that’s always fun. And the Shadow to Light Missing Scene; it wasn’t as long as I hoped, but it turned out exactly as I imagined it happening. 

Biggest surprise:  Everyone really, really liked Forgotten. And Vampires in Vegas, which I honestly thought were the weakest offerings during FicMas. 

Most unintentionally telling story:  The Way of Things. There’s so little dialogue, and it’s covering such a massive amount of time and story that it’s intentionally written to tell. 

Story I’d like to revise: Love & Duty, and Married in Vegas. A little polish, a little shine, it’s fine. For Love & Duty, it’s definitely the time crunch I need to go back and fix; for Married in Vegas, it’s just reflective of how long ago I started it. I’m a better writer, I know the characters more, and I’m less prone to overly dramatic plot twists. 

Story I didn’t write but will at some point, I swear: Look, let me lay the groundwork now so that no one who isn’t on the Discord isn’t startled. 

There’s going to be a Jess/Jasper/Alice threesome fic, and I regret nothing. 

I really, really want to get All These Broken Things redone and posted because it’s getting silly how long it’s just been sitting there. 

I want to actually write Monster, which is a fic I don’t talk about much but I want to write. It’s a question about who the monster of the story is, and I’m not sure I’m as skilled as I should be, to write it, but I want to try. 

And one of my numerous attempts at a Haunted House Cryptid fic. It has to happen, I have so many ideas!

[disneyphantomlover]

Thoughts on BATIM’s Crack-Up Comics, Part 1

 First, the Syndicated Comic Strips. Because yes.

Jesus, the audience loves to shit on Boris and Bendy. I wonder if that’s because Joey saw everyone as shitting on him and his creative friends...

BORIS. Boris, honey, how frikkin hungry are you?!

DUDE. Just cuz YOU can toss money into the fireplace doesn’t mean everyone can! The looks of dismay Bendy and Boris have... I feel it in my soul.

BENDY. Bendy, stop trying to profit off other people’s stuff!

The fact Bendy can’t draw for beans amuses me to no end. 

....Noooooot sure I like the implication that Boris and Bendy have 0% luck and exactly 1 brain cell. 

I do like fact that Boris is shown to be a liar and a thief! And he encourages and teaches the Wooly Trio to be better liars and thieves! ...Wait.

I almost feel bad that Boris just shames Bendy for sucking at stealing a pie. But I also wanna laugh because yeah, he does suck at stealing a pie. 

....WELL. That backfired. Never underestimate how hungry a wolf can be I guess. 

YIKES. I can’t tell if he’s just hurt or embarrassed, getting hit in the face sucks. And Boris is NO help. 

AGAIN. Bendy. You have the shittiest of luck. 

Okay, I laughed out loud. I have lived in deserts all my life and you KNOW it’s hot when the damn pool is too hot to swim in. 

....THE FUCK IS THAT PAINTING DOING?!

ALSO, how the FUCK are you making millions during the gd DEPRESSION?! You know what?? You keep stealing, Bendy. Boswell can afford it.

Not gonna lie, Rube Goldberg machines are so damn funny to me. DId not know that Rube Goldberg was a cartoonist himself. Or him drawing these machines pretty much started in 1928. OR that his first name was actually “Reuben”. I’m learning so much!

How...? How did you manage to give Boswell so much hair?!

I’m starting to see a trend of Bendy taking advantage of Boswell. I ain’t mad, but it’s a little unsettling for some reason.

Boris, you charmed an angel right out of the damn SKY. Dude’s got some great musical skills!

Alice is almost as mischievous as Bendy, I swear! She definitely gives off a sort of Betty Boop air though; she’s pretty and has a lovely voice, and is more than willing to tease. ....I am suddenly filled with dread.

.....Boris, why are you eating a heart? WHY ARE YOU EATING A HEART?!

.....AGAIN. BORIS. WITH THE SHIT LUCK. Just.... HOW?!

Boswell... You are throwing money away. My. GOD. If this is meant as an allegory to Nathan Arch, then there’s something there about Arch throwing his money away to Drew.

....Okay, this going from silly to rather upsetting with the way they’re treating Boswell. 

That’s rather interesting that Bendy does the Poor Yorick speech. A speech well known for addressing death as being inevitable. And Bendy gets booed off stage immediately. 

Awwww... These stories got endings. Though....Why the heck did it take a YEAR and 6 months for the Wooly Trio to show up again, and the Pie Lady almost 2 WHOLE YEARS. 

....Wait. WAIT. Some of these comics are out of order?! SON OF A BITCH I’m gonna have to see what the proper order is for these!

[one-leaf-grimoire]

“illusion”

Chapter 12

Finally, another chapter!!!! I think you will enjoy this one 0.0

Warning: VERY SEXY CHAPTER. ORAL SEX. :)))

I've never slept a whole night with someone before. Lawrence never stays after he's gotten what he wants, leaving me alone to curl up in my misery. Of course, Alice and I have had sleepovers where we shared the bed, but not like... this. When I open my eyes the next morning, stirred by the singing of the earliest bird outside, it takes me a moment to remember why someone's arms are wrapped around me so tight, their legs tangled with mine, and their face buried into the back of my head. Once the memory fades into my drowsy mind, I can't help but smile.

Because, despite how I arguably embarrassed myself last night, Julius is still here, holding me tight as he snores away.

None of it really makes sense, at least not yet. To be perfectly honest, I didn't know Julius would actually... feel something for me. The most I was hoping for was a one-night-stand, fueled by that fleeting moment of hunger in the hallway. The way he looked at me then, I knew I could get at least that much. I didn't expect him to grab hold and not let go, to show genuine interest in me, not just my body. It's foreign... something Lawrence never wanted to give me. Yeah, he would hold my hand, he would fuck me, but he wouldn't cuddle me at all, much less like this. 

Part of me warns against hope. But everything else is telling me to hold on tight myself.

Despite the warm feelings that flood my chest at the thought, I can't just hang around here forever. I crane my neck (pretty difficult in this position) and see that it's nearly 7 am on the clock. Breakfast is at 7:30, so people will be walking around the base soon. I can't be seen coming out of Julius's room in just my nightgown! If someone sees me, they'll talk, and before I know it, Lawrence is going to be knocking at the door demanding an explanation! UGh- There's nothing more I want to do than snuggle back next to Julius and sleep the day away, but it's too risky. With a heavy heart, I start to try and remove myself from him.

Emphasis on "try." The moment I move, Julius's grip tightens and he silently curls up around me. It's almost suffocating at this point, like some snake wrapped around its prey! "Uh- Julius- I need to go-" I whisper meekly, not sure there's anything I can do. 

"...no you don't." Julius finally speaks, his voice still weighted with sleep. His leg slides over mine and hooks around, trapping me further. "Stay here... just a few more minutes."

It's not like I have a choice, but something tells me that I was looking for a reason to stay. "Alright, fine." I relax into his hold, and I feel him smile against my skin, satisfied that he's won this small battle. His grip loosens, as if he's melting, and for a brief moment in time, I melt, too.

...but... I still don't get it.

I feel his lips again, this time on my cheek, the light touches like a butterfly alighting upon me. I have to squeeze my eyes shut and hold in a giggle at the sensation, a movement he picks up on. Julius chuckles to himself, still sleepy, his lips trailing down my neck and leaving delicate kisses behind. "How did you sleep?" he finally mumbles, his thumb drawing small circles over the hand he's holding. "I hope I didn't snore to loud."

"No, it was nice," I whisper back, his voice somehow grounding me more in reality. "Your bed is so comfy."

"You can sleep here every night, if you want. For- er- safety reasons."

I let out a soft laugh, and I hear him join me. "Maybe... we'll see."

"We'll see-" he repeats, then lets out a sigh. It's almost... sad. "Sorry... it's been a while since I slept next to someone."

Huh? Really? I have to resist the urge to turn over and look at his face. That's surprising... Julius has a lot of admirers, it would be easy for him to invite someone into his bed. But maybe, he has the same problem I do... the only love I knew was the physical kind, a selfish, lustful love that left me drained and disoriented. I remember the way Elia and the other girls talk about him, and how I even looked at him... like he was a piece of meat ready to consume.

He's like me, isn't he? He's... lonely.

"...I'm sorry."

"Hmm? For what?"

Love... I don't know if I'm ready to even say that word. Somewhere deep inside, the feelings coming off of Julius make something very clear... the potency of this feeling almost scares me. And for whatever reason, I'm the one in his sights, but instead of it being an honor, it seems like a burden. I'm a lost cause, right? My perception of love is skewed, ruined. And I know, if I turn around and look in his eyes... I'll get lost in them. I'll drown, because when it comes to love... I just can't swim.

"...nothing."

........................................

"So??? How was it!!!?"

Alice is waiting for me by the time I sneak back to my own room, promising to see Julius again at breakfast. "Um... good?" I deflect the question before turning to my dresser. "It went like you would expect it..." In reality, it did not go at all how I expected it, but at least now I don't have to lie to Alice. 

"Awww, come ooooon~" Alice whines, rolling over to keep watching me. "Tell me the deets!!! 

Uh oh. I avert my eyes and focus on stripping down and pulling on my uniform. "Well... it was very nice. But more than that..." I pause my dressing for a moment, a little smile playing on my lips. "He was nice... I don't know, maybe it's just because I've been with an asshole all my life, but Julius..."

"Ewww, never mind, if you're going to start talking about love stuff!" I turn and give Alice a disgruntled look, which causes her to peel back off into laughter. "Kidding! I'm happy for you, really." She sits up and swings her legs off the bed. "So, do you have a plan? Like- with Lawrence?"

"Not yet... I have to keep it secret for now," I tell her, pulling my robe over my head. "So you keep your mouth shut, you hear?"

"Got it!" Alice smirks and gives me a faux-salute. "And you keep your mouth shut, too... I'm sure it's hard to keep quiet when he's inside you-"

"ALICE."

Despite that just being a little joke, something starts to worry me as we make our way down to breakfast together. I feel... guilty. I know I shouldn't, but I do. God! If only I had held it together last night, I would have actually gotten laid... by a guy who actually cares about me, too. My ears start to heat up at the mere thought of it, but it's accompanied by a pleasant hunger in my belly that's definitely not the result of it being mealtime. I'm sure he meant it when he said he was fine with just sleeping, and he definitely enjoyed cuddling... but... I wouldn't blame him if he were a bit frustrated. Julius is lonely... I feel like I deprived him of something he needed.

It's a ridiculous thought, Julius hasn't demanded anything from me. But still... I want to give it to him. I want to know what it feels like with someone I actually like. Have I missed my chance?

No... there's going to be many more chances. Even today. It's only morning, after all! I'm sure another chance will come up if I'm patient.

Spoiler alert: I'm not patient in the slightest.

"Good morning, you two! My, you're looking radiant."

I thought Alice would be the one I have to rein in when it comes to my secret, but as soon as Julius sees us, I realize that it's him. He's already sitting at the table, fork in hand, but it falls to the table when his eyes land on me, and a big dumb smile becomes plastered on his face. Uh oh... don't be obvious, Julius!!!! I gulp and give him a nervous smile, hoping that none of the others already here will pick up on all the tension. "Oh... thank you! You look pretty good... yourself?"

Alice is nearly drawing blood as she bites her lip, dragging me to sit down next to her at the table. Julius simply chuckles a little to himself and thankfully remains silent, although his eyes don't leave my face the whole time. 

"What's got you looking so happy this morning?" Elia finally slides into the seat next to me, sourly looking at my face. 

"Huh? Oh-" I shrug, quickly busying myself with my food. "I uh- just had a good time at the lake yesterday."

Elia obviously doesn't believe me but doesn't pursue the subject. "Fine. Keep your secrets."

"Hey girls!"

We look over to see Giles and Nigel walking in, plates piled high with food. Those two are unmatched in how much they can eat. "Hey losers-" Alice counters. "Where's Wren? He usually comes down with you."

"Apparently he got called to a meeting with the captain," Nigel snickers. "Sounded kind of serious... maybe he's in trouble!"

"That would be funny," Elia adds, glancing at me out of the corner of her eye. "maybe he'll get kicked out."

"Or imprisoned!"

"Or exiled-"

More laughter comes from my friends, but I can't bear to join in. All I can do is smile weakly and eat, hoping that I'm wrong and one of them didn't drug me that night.

"Hey... look-" Alice grabs my shoulder, her voice hushed, and gestures casually down the table. More of the senior knights are here, but I know exactly who she's talking about. "Guess who hasn't stopped staring at you since we got here?"

Oh boy. Cautiously. I glance over and see that Julius is indeed staring at me, almost dazed-looking, his head tilted slightly as it rests on his hands. His food is going cold for sure by now, but... 

AhH! JULIUS!! Don't be so obvious... anyone looking at you right now will know something is up- His buddy Elger, who's sitting next to him, has noticed, and stares at Julius with a weird look on his face. I quickly look away before he can connect the dots, but it might already be too late. "Ignore him!"

Alice giggles. "My, you must have really rocked his world last night-"

"ALICE."

Even after the conversation moves on, I can feel those eyes burning into my skin. Butterflies swarm in my stomach, but at the core of it is excitement. It takes everything in me to not stare back at him, make bedroom eyes, and let him whisk me away somewhere private. Well... that's not such a bad idea...

I still want him. Even if I have the rest of the day ahead of me, I want him now. 

"Hey, where are you going?"

"To wash my dish! I'm not that hungry." I smooth out my cloak after I stand up, making sure to talk loud enough that the other end of the table can hear. "See you guys soon." With that, I turn and sashay off, fighting the urge to glance back at the table. All I can do is hope that this vague plan works...

But of course it does.

"Heyya."

As soon as I finish washing my dishes, Julius is already up and leaning against the kitchen doorframe, his usual smile on his face. "Oh, hi!" I greet, giving him a smile of my own. My pulse quickens as I struggle to move onto the next phase of my plan. Luckily, he does it for me.

"Want to go talk in private?"

"...yeah!"

And so, we head off upstairs, to his office. The entire walk there is filled with tension, so thick I could choke. I barely notice when he shuts the door behind us, I'm so lost in my thoughts. Now what? I'm not used to taking this type of initiative... oooh, what if he thinks I'm being to presumptuous? No, no,of course not... well-

"So... I've been thinking." Julius suddenly speaks before I can get my first word in. "We should start seriously sizing everyone up, and figure out who might be our culprits."

"...huh?" I blink, so lost in my self-made adrenaline that I can't immediately catch up.

Julius frowns. "You know? The ones who attacked you?"

"OH. Right!" I connect the dots and let out a nervous laugh. Get yourself together! Don't look like an idiot, at least... "Right, right, right... it's not fun to think about, but I suppose I have to."

"I'm sorry." Julius moves over to his desk and leans against it, his feet planted firmly on the ground. My eyes drift over his strong legs before quickly flickering away. Now that we're having an important conversation, I can't just derail it by jumping him right now... despite how delicious he looks. 

"Are you okay?"

Fuck! I just started going off into another daze. I jump a little as I feel his hand on my shoulder, and I blush a little as I let myself look up at his concerned face. "I know it's overwhelming, but I want to get to the bottom of this, okay?" I nod slowly, prompting him to lean in and press a sweet kiss to my forehead. I can't help but let a smile flicker on my face for a moment. "You know what you mean to me now... we can talk about this more later, though, okay?"

"...okay..." I lean forward and press my face into his chest, a gesture he accepts eagerly. The safe feeling of his arms around me threatens to make me melt right then and there, but then I realize that I have an opening.

"Julius?"

"Mhmm?"

"I was... uh... thinking."

"Thinking? Really?" I pinch his arm as he teases me with mock-disbelief. "About what?"

"...about..." I gulp, glad he can't see my face right now. "er... l-last night."

It's hardly noticeable, but I feel his grip shift at the words, just enough to make me realize that he's been thinking about it, too.

"Is that so?" His voice hasn't changed, still calm and comforting. "What about it?"

"You know..."

He finally gives me a real reaction, a soft laugh that I feel more than hear. "Right... I had a good time, you know."

A little pang of guilt hits me again. "Did you?"

"...yeah!" He suddenly pulls back to smile down at me, his narrowed eyes taking in my embarrassed face. "I always have a good time with you."

"Yeah, but- uh-" I feel a little frustration. I don't want him to think I'm so timid after last night! That was just a fluke! He's being so careful with me... I need to be more aggressive! 

"I mean it, don't worry." Julius's hand lands on my head and strokes it softly, which incidentally gives me an idea. "I thought I made it pretty clear... you're special to me, and even though I'd love to go farther with you, I want to go at a rate you're comfortable with- AH! W-what are you doing-?"

Julius cuts himself off, his voice wavering nervously as I suddenly kneel down in the middle of his little spiel. "I'm showing you that I'm perfectly fine with this rate- or whatever-" I tell him quickly, willing myself forward before I chicken out. I run my hands up his thighs, my heart skipping beats with every band of muscle I feel. "I mean... if you want me to?" I look up at him through my eyelashes, my lip pouting just slightly. I might be naive about a lot of things... but I know how to get what I want. 

The concern in Julius's eyes fades slightly, not quite disappearing all the way, but it's replaced by something else. Almost like curiosity... but more than anything, want.

"... go on."

I give him a little grin, finally letting my hands continue sliding up. Julius sucks in a little breath, for the most part silent as he stares down at me, his mouth twitching just slightly as I avoid his crotch and go for his belt instead. The anticipation is killing me, and it must be doing the same to him, but I will myself to be patient and make him so hungry for it, he can't resist. I want him to let go of his fear, and let himself pull me close, to let me in. He's a lonely man, and I want to help... in whatever way I can. And right now, this is how I do it.

"Here, let me help-"

Julius is quick to reach down and make quick work of the belt I was fumbling with, the zipper quickly following. Last night, I got to feel him up but couldn't actually get a look at him since I... passed out and all. But now, there's nowhere else to look as he pulls the front of his pants down and lets his already-stiff cock spring out at me. 

Oh shit-

It's bigger than I remember feeling last night, and I can't help but stare for a long moment, my mouth slightly open. I'm drooling, yeah, but it's also very intimidating. And it doesn't help when I feel that hand on the back of my head, pulling me in. "Take your time... but not too much time." Julius bites his lip and glances at the door. "We are in a shared office after all."

He's right, and I give a little nod before finally leaning in and letting my tongue dart out. Julius nearly spasms when I go right for the sensitive tip, sucking once before pulling off and kissing lightly around the spot. "Oh, you have a little technique?" he asks, his voice still steady.

"What did you expect?" I mumble back, fighting off a blush as I catch a glance of him staring at me. "I'm not innocent... not that innocent." To express my point, I lick up his length once deliberately, finally getting a reaction. I feel his knees wobble slightly, and his hand suddenly knots in my hair.

"Of course not... you'll be good and innocent for me, though, won't you?"

The words send a pleasant chill down my neck, the soft growl in his voice, stirring many forgotten emotions within me. This is nothing like it is with Lawrence. It's not so much a demand when Julius pushes me down onto his cock, softly moaning as I finally get to work some magic. It's... a plead. "Ah- y-ou're good that this-" Julius breathes out, his hand pushing me faster, more deliberately. He's coming undone, a lot quicker than he expected, and despite the way his cock chokes me and tears form at the corner of my eyes, I almost smile. This is what I wanted, for him to feel good because of something I'm doing. He only pauses once to sit down in his chair, his limbs weakening. I take the opportunity to pull myself off and smirk up at him, my cheek resting against his inner thigh while my hand teasingly strokes him. "Enjoying yourself?"

"What do you think?" Julius, despite being out of breath, flashes me a grin, his hand stroking down to my neck once. "Don't tell me you're getting tired." I shake my head quickly. "Good girl."

I lean back down to continue, this time his hand restricting my movements, slowing them. Despite saying that we needed to be quick, Julius is taking his time now, determined to milk me (or- er- himself-) for all I'm worth. I can't help but think about Lawrence in the moment, how he would react one day once I leave him to take the arm of my gorgeous vice captain. How indignant he would be, how enraged to find out that I willingly pleasured this man. Every aspect of this experience...

It's thrilling.

He starts poking into the back of my throat, and I whimper slightly at the foreign feeling, struggling to keep taking it. Despite how I was talking before, my stamina is terrible and I'm not sure if I'm going to hold on for much longer. "I'm almost there, baby, I promise-" Julius grunts out, one hand gripping the side of his desk while the other starts setting an unmerciful place. I just weakly whine in response, my throat starting to burn a bit. "You're being so good- I'm going to make you cum so fucking hard after this-" The promise makes another jolt of adrenaline go through me, the thought of him doing this to me quite exciting. "God- ah-"

Just as he starts to lose himself, something grabs his attention. Maybe it's a sixth sense, or maybe he was using his time magic to check ahead, but Julius freezes up before he reaches a climax. I blink my eyes open to see his own widening, a look of shock and fear on his face.

"Fuck-"

There's no time to hide. Just as the word leaves his mouth, the door swings open and the other vice captain Malota walks in. Julius lets out a squawk of surprise and nearly jumps in his seat in a vain attempt to react, but only manages to knock his knee super hard against the bottom of his desk. "YOUCH-" The shout leaves his mouth as he panics, disoriented, horny, and scared.

"Julius-"

The only good thing about this situation is that I'm hidden behind his desk, and from where Malota is standing right now, she can't see me. But still, she stops in her tracks at Julius's reaction, arching a thin brow as he does nothing but sit there and pant, slowly turning red.

"Julius... were you-" A look of slight disgust crosses her vulture-like features, and her eyes just glance down at the table, very aware of the presence behind it, before rising back up to her comrade's embarrassed face.

"You know what... I don't want to know."

Without another word, Malota swiftly turns around and races out of the room, her face becoming indifferent again. A moment later, the door slams shut, and the two of us are left alone once again.

"... "

Neither of us dare to move. Julius's eyes stay fixed on the door as Malota's footsteps fade away, before looking back down at me. He lets out a soft sigh, the corners of his mouth twitching at the sight of me staring up at him with his cock still in my mouth (it's not like I had time to move! And plus, the hand on my neck is heavy-). "That was... close."

He finally lets go, and I draw in a shaky breath as I sit up, my throat awfully dry after the recent abuse it just received. "S-she didn't see me, did she-"

"No, no, she didn't!" Julius assures me, glancing at the door again, his fingers deftly brushing the hair out of my face. "Malota wouldn't care anyway, don't worry." he gives me a reassuring smile before licking his lips a little. "So... are you-"

Wait, he wants me to continue? After we got walked in on?! I blink a few times, too aghast to say anything at the moment. Julius laughs sheepishly. "I mean, she's probably not coming back, right?"

"...right..."

Somehow, I find myself smiling once again. Julius mirrors it, his pulse quickening as he grabs the back of my head again. "I think we're going to get along famously."

Julius doesn't beat around the bush this time. He thrusts down my throat again and again, his hips raising just slightly to meet my lips each time, his hands guiding me at his pace. I handle it a lot better this time, feeling satisfied every time he moans under my touch. He doesn't say anything, but I know he's getting close by the way his movements become sloppy, and his cock twitches needily. I give him exactly what he wants, sucking hard for a few thrusts. And that's it- With one last pleasured sound, Julius pushes me down and cums, hard. I wasn't planning on spitting anything out, but I still gag a bit as his release hits my throat, hot and thick and almost too much for me to handle.

For a few blissful moments, he just sits there, tensed up with his eyes squeezed shut. Then, finally, he lets go of me.

Not completely, though. His hands gently take hold of my shoulders as I sit up and cough a little, taking a few deep breaths through my nose. I'm a little dizzy and can't really see through my blurry eyes, but I feel overwhelming satisfaction. I did it... Julius, you're mine, you hear! I want to make him feel like this, again and again, and for him to do the same to me. Maybe love is something I can't handle right now... but I can let myself be close to him.

Eventually... love will follow.

The sensation of his fingers on my face pulls me from my thoughts. Julius chuckles, worn out, and traces the corners of my lip with a fingertip. "You missed some-" he states, swiping up the remains of his cum and pushing his finger into my mouth. I whine a little at the movement but get my revenge by sucking once. Julius sucks in a breath and quickly removes the digit. "Ah ah- don't tease me, or I'll have to punish you~"

"Punish?" I repeat, reaching up and rubbing my eyes. When I blink them open again, I can see just fine, the blur of the passionate moment gone. "I thought I deserved a reward."

"Oh, that's right. Here-"

Before I can do anything, his hands close around my waist and hoist me up, so easily that it makes me squeak out in surprise. The moment he set me down on the desk, his lips are on mine, his arms holding me as close as can be. I eagerly kiss back, my sore jaw enjoying the respite, and reach up to cup his face with my hands. Julius pulls back just enough to look into my eyes, and the look of sparkling admiration in his own catches me off guard. "What?"

"Hmm?" Julius seems to almost be lost in thought. "Oh, it's just... I like you."

"...?" I frown a little. Isn't that obvious? "Well, that's good to know."

A little laugh comes from his nose, and his goofy smile widens. "No, I mean- Ah, you're full of surprises, and I like that... not just with this... kind of stuff, but also with- you know-" Julius's words are fumbled, almost incoherent He finally spares himself and cuts himself off with a shake of his head. "Never mind, don't listen to me, I'm just being an old sap."

Despite his sheepishness, I somehow understand what he was trying to say. With just a little difficulty, I lean up and kiss his forehead softly. "It's okay... I feel the same way, Julius."

"...I'm glad. Thank you."

With that, he buries himself back into my embrace, our lips moving so perfectly that it seems like they were made for each other. I close my eyes and start to get lost again, pure joy overtaking all logic and guilt in my mind. For a brief moment, Lawrence doesn't exist, my attacker doesn't exist, nothing does... nothing in this world matters but him. 

At least, just for that moment. Because the door slams open a minute later.

"Julius! Sorry to interrupt again, but-"

Both of us scream and whirl around, still holding each other, to see Malota run in again. For the first time, the emotion on her face seems real, the shock of seeing me, a girl engaged to a prince, being kissed by Julius. We sit there in silence for a moment, but then, in true Malota fashion, she sighs deeply, all emotion leaving her face.

"...I won't ask... but-" She straightens up. "We're leaving."

"Leaving?" Julius repeats nervously. I can feel his heart racing through his chest. "What's happening?"

"Apparently the Diamond Kingdom's been attacking the border since yesterday-" Malota explains, shocking us both. "But the Crimson Lion Kings were sent to handle it in secret. Now we're being called in."

We're being called in... wait... A jolt of fear shoots through me. That means... the Crimson Lions failed! The Diamond Kingdom beat them?!

"I see- the whole squad is going?"

"Yes. Our briefing is in 2 minutes." We can hear footsteps all around the base now, thundering urgently in the rush to get ready. "Be down there beforehand."

"Right." Julius's face is stony now, but flinches slightly as Malota turns to leave again. "Er- Malota- about this-"

"Don't worry. I don't care anyway-" Malota assures him before disappearing once again.

With a deep sigh, Julius lets go of me, helping me get off the desk. "I'm sorry," he apologizes, still looking pale. "She saw us- I should have been more careful."

"Maybe... but we have a bigger problem now." That familiar pre-battle feeling is already coursing through my veins. Trying to ignore the dread balling up inside me, I reach down and take his hand one last time. 

The Diamond Kingdom...

Maybe, for a moment, the world didn't exist. But now, it's crashing down on all of us.

[a-k-a-loser]

1-69

1. are you religious?

nope! i was raised catholic tho and i still hold on to some of the weird catholic habits. i’d call myself aesthetically catholic

2. what animal do you think you’re most like?

hmmmmmmmm a cat?? or some weird bird maybe??????

3. how do you take your coffee?

too much sugar and some milk, i also like flavored coffees and cold brew!!

4. how old were you when you had your first kiss?

still haven’t had my first kiss yet actually!

5. museum date or aquarium date?

i work at a museum that has an aquarium, so neither! but aquarium definitely

6. do you have any tattoos or piercings? do you want more?

my ears are pierced and i have one tattoo! i want to get my nose pierced and i commissioned my friend to draw a new tattoo for me a while ago and i haven’t got it yet, i have a short list of some others i want too!!

7. favorite fruits?

raspberries! i’m actually not really a fruit person, i prefer vegetables

8. favorite vegetables?

zucchini!! squash, celery, asparagus, snap peas, it’s a very long list tbh!!

9. i’ll only date you if _____. (fill in the blank)

you’re taller than me lol idk actually??? the bar is so low

10. do you cry a lot?

yes, always, just assume i’m crying right now

11. who are your closest friends?

i don’t have a ton of friends, so i’m pretty close with all the ones i have, because there’s like 4 of them, but i think my closest friend might be my friend mckenzi, i’ve known her since the 4th grade and she’s the best

12. have you ever been a part of a protest or a march?

i haven’t! there aren’t a lot of protests or marches locally, so it’s not really easy for me to attend any, also my parents are p against the idea of protesting and i live with/am financially dependent on them rn sooooooo

13. do you play any video games?

YES!!!!! i am a HUGE dragon age fan, dragon age 2 is my favorite! rn i’m playing a lot of rdr2 and i love it so much!!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

14. did you ever have an emo or scene phase?

i wanted to!!! really badly!!!! but my mom would never let me cut or dye my hair, and i didn’t get to wear any of the ~super cool scene/emo clothes~ and i’m a little thankful because no embarrassing scene phase pics but also :(

15. what color is most of your wardrobe?

it’s mostly dark colors, but i think other than black it’s a pretty even split between blue and green right now

16. what do you like to do for fun?

aaaaaaaaaa mostly video games, sometimes drawing, i like to go outside or go to the park on kinda cloudy days, when it’s cool and there are no bugs out!

17. what is your biggest fear?

geese probably, or dying alone, it’s a tossup really

18. name a subject you know a lot about.

i know a lot of useless video game lore stuff!! and some other weird random topics because i go on internet deep dives when i get really curious about stuff

19. favorite fictional characters?

AAAAAAAAAAAAA i have too many tbh, atm arthur morgan owns my ass

20. do you read a lot? what are your favorite books?

i don’t read as much as i used to, so i’m including comics/manga in this, i really like junji ito’s work. i have tomie, gyo, and uzumaki, i also really love les miserables! and i was really into warrior cats as a kid

21. how would you describe your style?

a mess, and not even a hot mess

22. did you have a favorite stuffed animal when you were little? do you still own it?

yes!! i have a stuffed animal of the three headed dog from harry potter (don’t know his name because idgaf about harry potter tbh) and i love him and i still sleep with him in my bed!

23. what’s something most people love that you hate?

ummmmmm idk brussels sprouts i guess????

24. do you think you’re a good singer?

no, horrible, as anyone who has ever ridden in a car with me

25. who do you live with?

my mom, my little brother, and our pets!!

26. favorite desserts?

CHEESECAKE

27. what is the best decision you’ve made in your life so far?

idk, yesterday i ate a bunch of honeysuckles i found in my yard and that was p good

28. favorite makeup brands?

not sure, i use drugstore makeup and i don’t really pay attention to the brand???? just like??? the cheapest matte full coverage makeup available at the store

29. favorite clothing stores/brands?

again not really, most of my favorite clothes come from goodwill, and when i buy clothes not from goodwill i’m looking mostly for stuff that’s comfortable and fits

30. what was your first job?

i still have my first job! i work at a children’s museum, i do kids parties, summer camps, and i tell people not to touch things!

31. do you take a lot of naps?

not really, but when i do sleep i can sleep for like 10+ hours sometimes

32. what is your favorite part about your body?

hmmmmmmmmmmmm??????? like maybe my nose??? or my shoulders?

33. are you more dominant or more submissive?

i stop typing when i see that the person i’m texting is typing, so i’m gonna day submissive

34. are you more outgoing or more shy?

it depends on like my mood and where i am, i can be very outgoing but i’m actually pretty shy in general

35. how tall are you?

5’5” ish

36. what is your body type?

lil chubby i guess

37. favorite flower?

hyacinth!

38. favorite planet?

venus!

39. what do you want to dress up as for halloween this year?

A WEREWOLF! or my finished taako cosplay!

40. do you prefer to date people the same age as you, younger, or older?

my age or older! anyone who is younger than me is a baby as far as i’m concerned!

41. describe the person you’re in love with/have a crush on in great detail.

i’d rather not

42. who is your biggest inspiration?

not really sure??

43. do you have any kinks?

nope

44. do you own any pets?

i have 2 dogs and 2 cats!

45. which celebrity do people say you look the most like?

none of them, this one time a guy who was cutting my hair said that short hair made me look like natalie portman but that is a lie

46. do you like sports?

sorta? i want to get into hockey and i used to play volleyball! when i was kid i liked to go to baseball games

47. have you ever seen a broadway musical?

no :(((((((( but i have seen some local plays!

48. what is your favorite kind of food?

vegetals

49. would you rather be a fairy or a mermaid?

fairy

50. what is your instagram?

a_k_a_loser

51. glossy lips or matte lips?

i don’t wear lipstick, but i like the look of matte lipstick!

52. do you like cherry, grape, blue raspberry, watermelon, or green apple jolly ranchers the best?

green apple!!!!!!!!!!

53. what are your best personality traits?

i can be very patient and i think i’m pretty loyal!

54. what is your ethnicity?

i am very white, but i’m also 1/4 puerto rican

55. what different hair colors have you had?

red, blonde, grey, pink, orange, silver, and right now it’s blue/green on one side!

56. favorite disney princess?

moana!

57. favorite album of 2017?

going grey!

58. have you ever had braces?

yes! and then i didn’t wear my retainer and now my teeth are fucked again!!

59. favorite holiday?

HALLOWEEEN!!!!!!!

60. post a selfie.

61. are you a good swimmer?

not at all!

62. do you wear jewelry?

sometimes, i don’t really wear earrings or necklaces very often because they make me feel too feminine, but i like rings and bracelets!

63. can you play any instruments?

no :((

64. do you have any siblings?

yes! i have two brothers! i’m the middle child

65. are your grandparents still alive? how old are they?

both of my grandfathers have passed away, but both of my grandmas are alive and in their 80s!

66. who knows the most about you?

uhhhh idk, probably my cousin @olds-paper

67. are you a more quiet person or do you talk a lot?

little of both?? it really depends on who i’m with!

68. what advice would you give to your 13 year old self?

DONT CUT YOUR HAIR TO LOOK LIKE ALICE FROM TWILIGHT, YOU WILL LOOK BAD

69. how many pillows do you sleep on?

5!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #205

forget picking song lyrics, i’m going the hell to bed now.

Do you live by yourself? I live with my mom. Do you like cleaning? Does anyone???? Who is your favorite character from Harry Potter? I've never watched the series; not even a single movie, actually. So I don't have an opinion. Do you watch PewDiePie? Extremely rarely. He's funny, but I'm not interested in his channel's content anymore. Do you like "Despacito?" My sister showed it to me once when she learned I'd never heard it, and I found zero appeal in it whatsoever. Do you play Pokemon Go? It's a brilliant idea, and I really do wish I could play it, but here where I live, there are like ZERO PokeStops (where you get Pokeballs), even in cities, so it's pretty much impossible. Did you ever color your hair pink? No. Do you like Dr. Phil? I don't watch the show and don't know him as a person. Do you prefer to be inside or outside? Inside. Do you eat meat? Sadly. I'm HOPEFULLY quitting when I get to the weight I want; I wasn't getting the nutrients I needed when I was vegetarian to where my body was desperately clinging to what it had or something like that (basically, my weight wouldn't budge in a couple of months), but even still, I don't know if I could do it without depriving myself again. I'm just such a picky eater. Do you need to do the dishes? Yeah. Not desperately, but. Are you scared of clowns? No. Do you have any subscribers on YouTube? *checks* A very impressive 66. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes. Do you salt your popcorn? Yes. Do you like McDonald's? Don't even lie to me, you'll eat there. I don't mind it at all. Do you have a Steam account? Yes. Do you like gaming? Not as much as I used to, but yes. Have you ever played Five Nights at Freddy’s? No. I don't consider jumpscares to be genuinely "scary," but rather a natural reaction to surprise, but FNAF's are intense, and I know they'd have me jumping like crazy. That aside, the games aren't of my personal appeal to actually play (though it's a fun game to watch). Do you like horror movies? Yes. Do you like chicken nuggets? I love me my chicken nuggies hunty. Have you ever tried Akinator? Yes. Can you twerk? I don't know and don't care to. Do you like dabbing? It looks stupid to me. The meme of it makes me laugh, though. What was the last country you visited? I've never left the country. Do you know your phone number? No, actually. It is incredibly difficult for me to memorize sequences, and besides, it's not like I give out my number almost ever. Do you swear in front of children? No. What’s your opinion on Brexit? Shit, I don't even remember what it's about. So obviously I can't have an opinion. It doesn't affect me, anyway. If you want children, what are some of your reasons for wanting them? N/A When you cook a dish that has beans in it, do you prefer to use canned or dry beans? I don't cook, and you'll never see me willingly eat a bean. What were some fun experiments you did in science class as a kid? The two that sharply stand out to me are dissecting an owl pellet in elementary and a frog in middle school. Both were SO cool. What was the last strong emotion you felt? Excitement. After finishing a bowl of cereal, do you drink the leftover milk? Only ever if it's Cinnamon Toast Crunch that I ate. And even then, only sometimes. Do you use dry shampoo between washes? No. What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done? Overdosing. What’s the most severe allergic reaction you’ve ever had to something? Nothing severe, besides pollen allergies flaring up. What’s your favorite sub-genre of rock? Hard. Who was the last person to get frustrated with you, and why? Mom, but she was more than frustrated. We were having a serious fight about her attitude towards Dad and his wife. What’s something that makes absolutely zero sense to you? Anti-vax shitlords. What’s your phone background? Lock screen is Darkiplier, home screen is Sara kissing my forehead. :'> Have you ever lived with someone you didn’t get along with? No. Do you have a fitness tracker? No. What types of animals have you had as pets? A billion cats, dogs, snakes, lizards, rats, gerbils, guinea pigs, rabbits, fish, box turtles, hermit crabs... and probably more. How well do you understand economics? Have you ever taken an econ class? Not well at ALL. I had one my senior year. What was the last fruit you ate? I had two bites out of a watermelon 'cuz I was really hungry, but we didn't really have anything as a snack. (I fast daily, so I have to watch when my meals are.) I'm not a big watermelon fan, but I hadn't tried these cubes before, and at least it was something. Can you remember your first day of school? I believe I can very faintly... very faintly. I think I had a complete breakdown because of my insane separation anxiety regarding my mom, or it was the complete opposite... alskdfjaweiajr it's like I can kinda see it in the back of my head, but it's super blurry. What’s your favorite movie? The Lion King. It was my favorite as a kid and became so again as an adult just truly acknowledging how damn good and meaningful it is. Plus the soundtrack was a banger. Would you rather jump out of an airplane or go scuba diving? Scuba diving. Do you get bored looking at other peoples’ holiday pictures? Eh. If it's a whole lot, yes, but as a photographer, I enjoy noting which ones I like and why I favor them. Do you give money to charity? Not currently, no. I have no money to give. When I do have a paying job, I plan on definitely donating any time Mark does a charity stream. Are you more into music or movies? Music, easily. When was the last time you went to a swimming pool? WOW. It's been years. Either when I still lived in the apartment or once at Colleen's in-laws', I can't remember which was last. Would you rather have a pet snake or a pet turtle? I have a snake, and I'll take another for sure. Have you ever seen a band live? Who was the last you saw? Just Alice Cooper. Ma and I are seeing Ozzy next year (if the poor man ain't dead), tho!!!! And he's gonna be with Judas Priest and Megadeth. We are NOT going to survive. Do people who use massive amounts of emoticons annoy you? Yes. Emojis, more specifically. If you're writing a sentence and you use an emoji after each and every goddamn word, it drives me up a wall. What was the last clothing item you bought? Underwear, I believe? Or a bra? What does your washing powder smell like? Idk. Normal? Do you have a dishwasher or do you do dishes by hand? By hand, which I cannot explain how much I loathe. It feels disgusting. Are there any cobwebs in your room? I don't believe so, no. Have you ever used a pick-up line and had it work? Ew, I'd never use one to begin with. Have you ever entered a modelling competition? Would you? No to both. The current modelling industry is so, so harmful. Did you keep any drawings/stories from when you were younger? Like around two years ago, I remember going on a mass destruction episode of those super old things, as they embarrassed me horribly, even though I know it had no real reason. Just everything I create embarrasses me. My mom has old school stuff, though. Who did you last have an argument with? Mom today. When was the last time you cooked for yourself? If you include putting things in the microwave with few steps... not that long ago. Maybe two days back. Do you have a safe? Mom does. When was the last time you saw a relative? Mooonths ago when Grammy and her husband were driving through. My brother and his son are visiting real soon, though!! Do you shout out the answers at quiz shows? Yes, lol. Have you ever been in a TV audience? I've been to like three-four hockey games, so yeah. Have you ever entered the lottery? Won anything? No. Well, Mom or Dad would rarely get those scratch-off tickets at random, but the most we've ever got was just like five bucks or so. Do you prefer crosswords or word searches? Word searches. Have you ever drawn on a wall in your house? No. Do you like making collages? No. Have you ever kept a scrapbook? Yeah. What’s your favorite video-game? Silent Hill 2 and Shadow of the Colossus. Sigh, I want a PS4 SO bad to get the SotC remaster. I actually teared up when I saw the opening cutscene for the first time, and I just marveled through the EEEEEEENNNNtire playthrough I watched. It's unbelievable. Do you remember any inside jokes from childhood? Not off the top of my head. I'm tired, don't make me think. Have you ever made up a word? Well, as a writer, I've made up names and places. A word itself, I don't think so. Do you get nervous speaking to people you don’t know on the phone? VERY!!!!!!!! Are you scared of anything irrational? You mean like, half my fears? Do you have a passport? What’s the picture like? No. Have you ever had a full fringe? (bangs) As a kid I did. Is there anything you would never admit to liking? Don't think so. What’s the weirdest craze you can remember? Fidget spinners. Do you use bug spray or fly swatters? Fly swatters. Then we also have this hanging cylindrical sticky... thing that flies and gnats are apparently attracted to with the smell, I guess. Works like magic, though I agree it's pretty cruel. Just stuck there until you die. Are you a clumsy person? Boy, am I. Do you have tiled floors in your house? In three rooms. Do you listen to any movie soundtracks regularly? No. Do you bruise easily? Way too easily. Like normally something simple won't leave behind an obvious one, but even a normal poke in the arm hurts a lot and leaves the spot sore for a good while. I was tested for anemia, but apparently, I don't have it. What would you love to learn to do? Play the electric guitar. Do you prefer monkeys or lemurs? Ehhh... lemurs as far as cute goes, monkeys overall. Do you watch movies based on the actors or the movie plot? The plot. Do you have any phone charms on your mobile? No. What is your opinion on sex without emotional commitment? That's a big 'ole honkin' nope. Last time you puked from drinking? Never. Have you ever gotten drunk and danced on a bar? No. What is your favorite simple ice-cream flavor? Vanilla. Though sometimes I prefer chocolate. Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages? Only for dinner. I forgot the science behind it, but one of my meds for bipolarity only works to its full effect after ingesting at least 350 calories; I only get about a 20% effectiveness of the medicine when eating less. I know it sounds weird, but my psychiatrist is a goddamn genius, and I trust every word that comes out of his mouth. When was the last time you slept on the floor? Two years ago when I was living with Colleen and I didn't have a blow-up mattress yet. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos? When???????????????? do I?????????????? not???????????????????????????????????? Do you wear flip-flops? That's pretty much all I wear just about year-round... I remember in 7th grade, one of my teachers asked me about it a lot and I just told her I didn't mind the cold, which was true. Pretty sure she thought I was lying and was too poor to buy new clothes or something, as she gifted me socks one day, which I thought was incredibly sweet. I miss my 7th grade teachers. Best school year. Who was the last person to kiss you on the cheek? Pretty sure my niece Aubree when saying bye. What is your favorite sauce to eat with spaghetti? Normal Prego sauce, I think. Have you ever seen a magic show? A little one as a kid. When was the last time you vomited and why? Months and months ago when I was testing a medication. Quit that shit real fast, as it made me sick so many times. Where do you usually sit when you eat dinner? Uhhh I eat in my bed usually, lmao. We almost never sit at the table. I normally do if Mom's there, though. How often do you get headaches? Ugh, often. Why did you call the last person you called? I was calling back about my job application that I was supposed to hear about yesterday. How many windows are in the room you’re in? Two. Do you have Facebook friends that you’ve never actually met? Yes. When was the last time you had your photo taken professionally? Not since senior pictures, pretty sure. I hated how it came out. I have a lazy eye when I smile, gah. How long does it take you to get to school or work? Currently N/A. Let’s say you had a baby with the last person you kissed? We're both female, so. And neither of us want kids anyway. When was the last time you completely broke down? A couple weeks ago in a totally random and severe panic attack. Do you have someone you can spill your heart out to? Yeah. Is there a person that you would do absolutely anything and everything for? No. I'm not gonna, say, murder someone just because they want me to. What’s something you really want right now? To go and get my tattoo cleaned up by a more professional artist alsdkjfalwei. I got the approximate cost, I just have to wait until I can afford it. This tattoo is so so so important to me and it needs to be perfect. What is your relationship status? Taken. What was the longest time you’ve wasted on a certain person? Not even two weeks lmao. I said yes to dating mostly out of fear of hurting his feelings, and he QUICKLY proved he was NOT for me. Are you listening to music right now? Yeah, my iTunes is on shuffle. Anyone you would like to get things straight with? I wouldn't want to be friends I don't think, but I REALLY want to see Jason one final time to tell him how sorry I am. I recently acknowledged just how fucked up I treated him after the breakup; he wasn't the only one who made mistakes. I sure as hell did. He deserves to hear it badly. I do believe our last talk was a good ending, but I feel me finally admitting that I fucked up would be the perfect one. What was the best thing that happened to you today? Seeing Dad for his birthday. When was the last time you did something for the first time? I talk-talked to some WoW friends a couple days ago, though very very briefly. I couldn't figure Discord push-to-talk out and I ended up panicking lmao. What color are the last new pair of pants that you bought? Black. Is your room clean? I should dust and vacuum, but the latter doesn't currently work. List all the countries you’ve visited.  I've never left America. At what age would you allow your kids to dye their hair? Shit, whenever they wanted tbh. So long they sounded serious about it and it wasn't just a brief episode of "oh this would be cool." Which fast food place do you eat at the most? Hm. Wendy's or Sonic. When was the last time you weren’t lonely? Jesus fucking Christ, who knows. What kind of movies do you like? Horror, fantasy, Disney/kids' films, comedies, rom coms, and emotionally moving ones. Bats are not spooky or are they? They're adorable, omg. Do you think blue is a gay color? Fuck off. What's your opinion on gays? Fuck off harder. Do you like the song "Womanizer"? Don't even talk to me if you don't. Where is your favorite place to get fries? You can't live your fullest life without having Bojangle's fries at least once. Do you know anyone who was raised by their grandparents? Idk. Have you ever made your own pie from scratch? No. Who was the last person you had an in-depth conversation with? Sara. What was the last fast food item you ate? A hot dog. What is your favorite gaming console? You know PS2 was the best, you know it. What was the last major city you visited? Raleigh, if that even counts. Do you always have a stock of alcohol in your house? No. Have you ever had a pumpkin latte and if so, did you like it? I hate everything pumpkin-flavored. Is there an antique store in your town or city? I think so... Have you ever been to a baby shower? My sister's. Maybe others', but idr. Do you know anyone who has been to rehab? Pretty sure yes. How many romantic relationships have you been in so far? Genuinely "romantic" ones, two. Would you consider yourself to be a picky eater? I am 99% sure I am the pickiest human being to ever live. Have you ever lived in a house with a pool in the yard? Not a built-in one. What color is your toothbrush? Blue. Do you have gluten intolerance or know anyone who does? I know a few people. Have you ever slept in a car overnight? No. Have you ever fainted? Yes. Do you avoid conflict as much as possible? YUP. Do you like ice cream cake? I'm not a big fan. Have you ever made out with someone of the same sex? Yes. Where is your second home!? The place I'm second-most comfortable is probably Sara's. What song always makes you sad? I avoid listening to "The Mortician's Daughter" by Black Veil Brides unless I just really, really want to hear it. I always tear up due to memories. Have you ever played a game that required removing your clothes? No. Where is your favorite place to be kissed? Breasts and neck. Were you mean as a little kid? No. Who was the last person you hung out with? Dad. What is your mother’s name? Donna. What is your favorite song at the moment? I've been in true love with a heavy metal cover of "Invincible" from the WoW soundtrack for like a full month. What day will you never forget? The breakup night. Suicide attempt. My niece and nephew being born. Meeting Sara. Getting Teddy. First time hanging out at Jason's. 16th birthday. Alice Cooper concert. Putting Dale and Cali down. There's a lot. What was the last thing you took a picture of? Some crazy shit on FB to show Sara. Something you're looking forward to? Getting a goddamn job. What is God teaching you right now? Lul. What does Notre Dame Cathedral mean to you, and how has its fire affected you? I was devastated to hear about it; it was the one event that actually got me paying attention to the news. It is a monument of incredible art and history, and for Catholics, a house of their god. I am so thankful the damage wasn't too tremendous. What’s the last dumb decision you made that you beat yourself up over? I dunno. Surprisingly. What’s your favorite version of the Bible to read? N/A If applicable, do you underline verses in your Bible? N/A When was the last time you went to church? Not since Colleen had her extreme Christian phase two years ago. What’s the last song you listened to on repeat? "Radio" by Rammstein. That new album's gonna be bangin'. Does your town’s hospital have a good reputation? NOPE. It sure does not. I have no issue with the psychiatric care unit there, though. Every time I went to the ER for suicidal thoughts or the attempt, they were sweethearts to me. But as far as physical health, they do NOT have a good rep. I know someone's grandfather that nearly fucking died thanks to them, and I can't recall what it was exactly, but Mom had some complaints during her kidney cancer treatment. What is your hometown known for? Crime. Are you longing for and missing a toxic person? I honestly miss Colleen sometimes, but I can't go back to her. I can't. I'm done giving her more chances than she deserves. It was nice to actually have someone to hang out with, but she is just overall not a pleasant person. What’s your greatest longing? Financial stability, probably. Have you ever read a Bible verse and thought, “this isn’t true”? BOY HOWDY- What are you behind on? Being an adult. I am 23 and a SOOOOOORRYYYYYY excuse for one. Is there someone who’s stolen from you and never got caught? Yes. Someone stole our basketball hoop from my childhood home. Have you been lonely for most of your life? Most of my life, no. What color is your sleeping bag? I don’t have one. When was the last time you used a sleeping bag, and what for? When I lived with Colleen and slept on the floor for a bit. Do you live near the woods? Yeah, there's woods across the road. What do you want to be for Halloween this year? List 1-3 ideas. I wanna be the dumb blonde witch from Hocus Pocus, lmao. A pastel vampire would be pretty cool. And Rhett from the "Sleep Tight" video has instilled in me the great desire to be a steampunk toothfairy at least once. List five things people have been jealous of you for. Idk. List five things you have felt jealous of other people for. More than anyone, a friend of many friends' photography success when I can genuinely and modestly say I really think I'm better than her. That is easily the worst envy situation I've dealt with (and still do), as this is the one that is actually almost spiteful, wrong as that is. Then I have another friend who is a FANTASTIC photographer as well and is now a professional one in the fashion industry, I believe. Then there was a girl I went to school with called Cailin whose drawing skills were naturally INCREDIBLE since elementary school, and I remember back then, me and her would always get the most attention for our work, but she did moreso, but I wanted to be the "best" artist. Once I hit high school I just had great respect for her talent. Next, one of my former best friends Hannia was a natural GENIUS that got perfect scores on LITERALLY almost anything; she had the highest GPA in the entire school, while I was right behind her. And uhhhh five... I have been and still am jealous of my sisters for being proper, successful adults. What is your favorite shade of brown? Like a caramel tone, I guess? What color is your toilet seat? White. Would you rather live in an apartment or a house? Definitely a house. What’s one thing you had growing up that you miss now? Energy. Do you prefer kale, lettuce, or spinach? Lettuce. Do you listen to instrumental bands such as Hammock, Trentemoller, etc.? No. Have you ever gotten a manicure or pedicure? Just because my sisters went and Mom wanted me to hang out with them. I may have with my old friend, too. Have you ever self-harmed? Yeah. Never the answer. Do you have any eating disorders? No. I'm afraid of developing one once I (hopefully) get to the weight I want, though. Have you ever met a celebrity? No. Do you like Monster Energy or do you prefer other energy drinks? I hate energy drinks. They taste like poison. Do you plan on getting married? Yeah. Do you want kids? That's a big fat nope. What’s your sexual orientation? I don’t judge. Bisexual. At what time of day do you normally feel the best? The morning. Name one reason why someone should not commit suicide. YOU. CAN. GET. BETTER. Seek professional help if you feel suicidal, and after what I understand is a serious struggle, you truly can go into the light at the end of the tunnel. You've got, to our understanding, one shot at this. Don't end it when there is a possibility for a beautiful future. If you’re unhappy, what would it take to make you fulfilled? Have a job and be in school. Name someone you know who is a cancer survivor. My mom. Are you friends with any cancer survivors? I don't think so. Do you wish the sunrise and sunset lasted longer? Hm. Sunset, maybe. Idk. Name a country whose history you know nothing about. Lmao most. What is your favorite store at the mall? Hot Topic. Do you have a bed or do you sleep on a mattress on the floor? I have a bed. When was the last time you went for a run? Shit, not since high school gym. Do you keep Christmas lights up year-round? No. What did you win a scholarship for? Nowhere. What type of bug do you see the most often in your home? Flies. Do you put off things until the last minute? I tend to. Is your mom the same size as you? No, I'm smaller. Do you know any Christians who aren’t judgmental? No shit. Do you still think of that Gwen Stefani song when you spell bananas? Ha ha yup. Do you like the way your hair naturally is, or do you change it? It's fine. But I want it dyed badly. Do you know anyone who died accidentally by doing something stupid? Yes. How many different languages have you taken in school? Latin and German. How tall is your father? (Estimate?) Idk. Over six feet. Would you meet Miley Cyrus if you had the chance? No. What is your favorite slow song? Oh yeesh. Idk. Maybe "See You On The Other Side" by Ozzy. Do you believe in karma? No. Do you constantly check your cell phone? No. Only Sara or Mom ever text me, and I pick it up just if the green light is blinking (means I have a message). If there were aliens on earth, would you be afraid? Well yeah. If you could spend 1 hour 20 years in the future, would you? Yes. I want to see where I am, so long as I can change my behavior to improve that future if needed. Otherwise, I don't wanna know. Are your pets asleep? Teddy probably is, Bentley might be, idk where Roman is, but he likely is, I can't see Mitsu from where I am currently, Venus may be (no eyelids, so you never know) as she's in her rock, and Kaiju is awake. Have you ever wished you were an only child? Never. Have you ever hurt someone on purpose? Yes. Have you ever gotten hurt while sledding? No. Do you enjoy going through old pictures? It depends on the subject of them and my mental state. Kid pictures I'm always up for, high school ones are okay, though they can make me really upset with how healthy and skinny I was, and I deleted all photos I had on Facebook of Jason and me last year so I couldn't even risk looking at them ever again, as there's a good chance some would trigger my PTSD. Of all your exes, who do you think you had the deepest feelings for? Jason, obviously. Do you tend to have a lot of drama in your life? I have the most uneventful, bland life. No. When’s the last time someone was disappointed in you? Idk. What song are you listening to right now? Is this one of your favorite songs? "Alone I Break" by Korn. No, but I love it. What is something you have to explain a lot? My sweating issue. Gross to talk about, but I sweat seriously excessively, like you would not believe. It can be 70 degrees and I'll be sweating in seconds. People worry about it, and in VR, I've had to explain it so many times due to it affecting suitable jobs (I think we can all agree being drenched in sweat at work looks extremely bad). Hopefully I won't have to anymore when my doctor decides what to do about it. It's most likely a thyroid issue, which I have no clue about how to subdue symptoms of. There's really a shitload I have to explain lately between doctors and VR... Which compliment do you receive the most? From those that know me/see me, that I'm losing weight. From people in general, "I love your hair" or something like that. Who were you last on the phone with? My sister. What is one thing you have always wondered? Uh. Idk. I'm sure there's a lot, just nothing's coming to me atm... What do your friends think about the music you listen to? Your family? My friends and I like similar stuff, as do my parents, especially Mom. My sisters are the total opposite of me and don't enjoy metal and the like at all. Has anyone ever told you to grow up? Essentially. Do you believe people when they say they don’t judge people? Hell no. How many true friends do you have? Excluding family and my girlfriend as they're more than that, like... one or two, it feels like most of the time. Can you honestly say you’re happy right now? No. What is something you are exceptionally bad at? Doing math in my head or spelling up there. AND READING LIPS. Do you have a house phone? No. Who do you love more than anyone right now? Don't make me choose between Mom and Sara. How much money do you have saved up? I literally have $11. Do you like bright/neon colors? Yes, but I prefer pastel. What is your favorite wild animal? Meerkats. Do you ever eat breakfast? I almost always do. Do you remember who your first grade teacher was? Yes. Have you ever won any trophies? What for? Yeah, for A honor roll all through elementary school (save for 5th grade; I got one B and was so upset, lmao), then in all kid sports I played, everyone got lil ones, some from dance I believe, and I think there's one or two others I'm not thinking of...

[truxi-twice]

Whoo. Back from Disney. My phone wasn’t functioning properly for most of the week either. What did I miss?

Disney was fantastic! It was Sterling’s first time ever going, and I’m just really glad I got to show him all sorts of things I knew he’d love. After almost ten years living together, I thiiiink I’ve got a pretty good idea of what his cup of tea is.

And in this case, his cup of tea was definitely getting to meet Alice at the UK pavilion in Epcot.  And Launchpad and Scrooge in Animal Kingdom. And dancing with José and Panchito in front of the castle (maybe. A little bit. He’s not big on Big Displays, but I think he liked that last one. Definitely more than the time the Majesty Makers made him try to pull the sword out of the stone).  And just the entirety of TomorrowWorld and Future World.

I really want to do a write-up of the whole thing while it’s fresh, but I don’t even know where to start.  Let’s try some highlights

- Dinner at the California Grill our first night in before even getting to the parks. We finished dessert (a s’mores-ish thing with a banana-jam cream puff, a chocolate-filled cream puff, a graham crisp, and marshmallow ice cream, which is officially the greatest marshmallow flavor) just in time to go out on the balcony and watch the fireworks, and no lie, I straight up cried. And I don’t mean I teared up. I was just covering my mouth and almost sobbing once they started up with “Touch the Sky.”  I think it’s just that that’s when it hit me that we were really there, and that literal months of planning had finally come to fruition and that we were getting to do one of the Big Things I’d been looking forward to for over half a year.  Plus, they were beautiful. THEY HAVE FIREWORKS SHAPED LIKE BLOCKS AND MAUI’S FISH HOOK!

-Started off in the parks with Haunted Mansion. Sterling’s call since Peter Pan was closed. Turned out to be a good’un. No matter how many times I ride that ride, I love it.

- It rained all day the first day. While that kind of sucked because it meant we were wet and cold, and no one noticed our Darkwing&NegaDuck Disneybounds, it meant that we literally just walked onto a lot of rides in Magic Kingdom and Hollywood Studios. Including Slinky Dog Dash. Which, just... I have never seen a wait time of less than an hour, usually longer.  I didn’t even bother booking Fastpasses because it looked like an ok kiddie coaster. It was a blast! And the theming was so cute and clever! So we immediately got back in (the very short) line to do it all over again. 

-Epcot was wonderful. Epcot is always wonderful. I could easily spend two full days in Epcot, and with the festival going on, I wish we’d gotten even more time.

-We Disneybounded José and Panchito in Epcot and actually got some recognition--mostly in the Mexico Pavilion. One of the castmembers let us use the hats in his stand to take photos!

-(they really need to #bringbackDreamfinder tho. Or do literally anything else with the Journey Into Imagination. It’s just so...dated and unpleasant, and generally just...unwhimsical it is. I don’t want it to go away. I just want it to go back to being a true journey into imagination.)

-We wore our Legends of the Hidden Temple t-shirts for our Animal Kingdom day, and everyone recognized them. Got a lot of compliments, but the best was truly Launchpad at the character meet-and-greet. He pointed at Sterling’s, then mine, then back again for a bit like he was thinking. Then he made Sterling pretend to be sneaking and he grabbed Sterling from behind like he was a temple guard.

-Also, just...Animal Kingdom. That was probably the best day where Everything Went Right. We rode Everest six times. Near close we just kept getting back in line, usually with a lot of the same people, and you could just tell everyone was so psyched up. We just barely squeaked onto the ride before it officially closed for the night, and got to see the start of Rivers of Light from the top.  It was beautiful. Everyone clapped and cheered when the ride was over.  Then we got out with enough time to scurry to the bridge and watch the rest of it. (Also, Sterling bought an adorable plush yeti. We’ve named him Spag. Spag Yeti.)

-Actually, speaking of people being excited, that’s something else I love about Disney. Everyone’s just so nice. Not just the cast members. Even the guests. It’s like we all feel like we’re part of the experience, so everyone’s just a little more pleasant to everyone else.

- We rode Rockin’ Roller Coaster three times in a row on our second-to-last morning and then swooped on over to Tower of Terror.

- The last night there was kind of rough (I thought we could make Fantasmic and Illuminations. That was foolish. We got to Fantasmic late, so even with fastpasses, we had lousy seats, and then we booked it to Epcot on aching feet just in time to see the last bit of Illuminations. In retrospect, we should’ve just done Illuminations, since that’ll be gone soon, which is a shame. It’s beautiful). But on a whim I asked about pin trading at our resort and found a Horizons pin--Sterling’s favorite attraction he never got to see. It kind of made the night a little better.

-...maaaaybe I went overboard with pin trading after that.  I found one of the  José construction pins tho!

- Our last go-through of the Haunted Mansion, the ride broke down. But it broke when we were in front of the ballroom scene. Specifically in front of the dueling portraits.  It was kind of cool to really got to look at everything thoroughly.

- I still love It’s a Small World.

- I left some Disney Art Drops around the park. Most got picked up without a word, but two people did actually tag me in a post with their finds, so that’s nice. A little girl found my Basil of Baker Street in the hedgemaze! ...Figment didn’t get picked up tho, which made me a little sad, because I wanted him to find a good home. I didn’t feel good about leaving him where he was overnight (it was in some bushes near the color-change tiles), so he came back home with me.

- Actually, speaking about those color change tiles, I’m so glad I saw someone talking about them online. That’s another thing that just about made me cry when I found them. They’re very simple, but something about them plus Spaceship Earth all lit up at night brings me right back to the very best of childhood.

So...yeah. Eventful week. I am exhausted. And dreading the thought of Doing Anything. But also wanting to get back to drawing stuff again.

One little Spark of inspiration...

[thetygre]

30 Day Monster Challenge 2 - Day #23: Favorite Bad Movie Monster

Alright, so most of these movies aren’t really all that bad; they’re just kind of ‘meh’. But they would have been a lot worse without these cool and/or goofy monsters.

1.       Jabberwocky (Alice in Wonderland 2010)

I am prepared to disclose that Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland was not horrible, but 60% of that opinion stems from the Jabberwocky. (The remaining 40%is 30% the other monster designs and 10% lesbian subtext.) The Jabberwocky has always been my favorite part of the Alice mythos (surprise surprise), and not to sound petty, but I have dropped Alice movies just for not including the brilling beast. Burton’s Jabberwocky might not be my favorite, but it has a lot going for it. The way they treat it is basically as Wonderland’s Tarrasque; a living WMD, a legendary kaiju, the ur-monster in a world teeming with dangerous and crazy creatures. The way it wakes up is even a direct nod to Chernabog from Fantasia; they are literally equating this thing to the Devil.

Second off; Christopher Lee.

Finally, when the Jabberwocky meets Alice to fight, he says this thing about meeting his ‘old foe’, ‘the vorpal one’, in battle again. It is made explicitly clear that he is talking about the vorpal blade, not Alice. And that just… I don’t want to say that that changes the entire movie, but yeah, it kind of does. The implications here are that the vorpal blade and the Jabberwocky have fought each other countless time before in the past. The history of Wonderland is just the history of a dragon and a magic sword fighting. Is the vorpal blade sentient? How many times have these two fought? This kind of transforms everything about the setting the movie has established for the last hour and a half. It’s just so filled with so much potential to me.

2.       Torgo (Manos: The Hands of Fate)

Y’know, when you’re in a dark place, you have to find your own light. A source of motivation, something you can cling to to pull you through to the other side. Maybe that’s a dream, a goal at the end of the tunnel, or maybe it’s a hero, someone you can look up to. I’m not saying that Torgo is a hero, but he inspires me. There are weeks at work where I just don’t want to get out of bed in the morning. I come home at night to an empty room and fall asleep alone. It gets hard, is what I’m saying. But you know who never stopped trying, even though he hated his job and was lonely too?

Torgo. That’s who.

Everyday Torgo gets up, throws on his blazer and hat, and he goes out there and busses a haunted motel for a boss he hates. But he does it, every day. And if Torgo can do it, you can too. So you’ve got to get out there and be the best damn lackey you can. You’ve got put in the work to make it to tomorrow. And when the good times roll in and come shining down on you, you take a minute to remember the man who helped you get here. Take a minute to remember Torgo, looking down on you from Cloud No. 9, shedding a tear.

3.       Radu (Seventh Son)

The Last Apprentice series is actually a pretty cool (and grim) series of dark fantasy/horror young adult novels, kind of like junior’s first Solomon Kane. The Seventh Son movie based on the series has piss-all to do with it, and its only redeeming features are some cool monster designs and Jeff Bridges. Of those cool monster designs, the stand-out for me is Radua aka Muslim Dragon Kratos. He’s one of our villain witches chief thugs, and is unnecessarily cool for a side-character. He’s got this whole Nosferatu Zodd code of honor thing, and wields these two chain blades and probably could have been the villain in his own movie.

Now that alone would have been a neat detail, but then he can turn into what I honestly consider one of the more interesting dragons in recent cinema. I talked before about how one archetype of dragons was of being these unholy, scavenger type wilderness monsters, and that’s kind of the vibe I get from Radu’s dragon form. It’s all lanky and feral looking. It has too many limbs, and it walks around like it doesn’t know how. It’s another unnecessarily cool design for such a generic movie, and it’s definitely worth checking out.

4.       Krakensaurus (Jack the Giant Slayer)

I don’t want to be mean and discount Jack the Giant Slayer as ‘discount Ray Harryhausen’, but thems is the breaks, as the saying goes. The movie is kind of charming in how earnestly it plays to being a 1960s fantasy movie, with princesses in pink dresses and warlocks with goatees and a rhyming leprechaun. The movies stop-motion monsters don’t really live up to industry standards, though. But I can’t sit here and lie and say that I don’t have a special fondness for the sea monster at the end. The movie’s penultimate scene sees our heroes trying to escape the warlock’s castle, so the villain summons a two-headed giant (or ettin, if you know your monsters) which looks suspiciously like one of Ray Harryhausen’s cyclopes. Trapped in a sea cave, the rhyming leprechaun trapped in a bottle (roll with it) summons a sea monster to deal with the problem.

Sometimes it’s the little things in life, like watching two weird looking monsters fight to the death. Our sea monster is a blue-green mixture of kraken and allosaurus, and I’m pretty sure its toy had more detailing than the actual moving model. When this guy showed up on the screen, six year old me was hype enough to punch through a wall. I spent the next week drawing pictures of him so I wouldn’t forget him. This movie has 100% more sea monsters and singing leprechauns than The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad, and that almost makes up for its deficit skeleton warriors.

5.       Queen of the Lair (She Creature 2001)

Stan Winston was on the helm for this little lady’s monster design, and it shows. A mermaid queen, it’s hard to tell if her monster form is her real shape or just something she can morph into. Even her basic mermaid form is pretty interesting; the split tails remind me of sirens or tritons. Her monster shape, though, is pure Stan Winston gold. There’s more than a little bit of the xenomorph queen in there, between the crest and the fangs. Someone threw it into a blender with a sea serpent and a viper fish and what comes out is the most badass mermaid to ever slink across cinema. She rips people’s heads off, her tail is covered with bone spikes, and she can sing a siren song to summon up her mermaid swarm. Oh, and psychic impregnation powers. That part’s kind of important.

6.       She Creature (She Creature 1956)

Aforementioned sea monster queen was part of a series of horror films based on old b-movies, so this is the original She Creature. Even today, this is one of my favorite designs from the 1950s. Paul Blaisdell might just be the king of B-movie monster suits, and belongs up there with Ray Harryhausen in the great monster hall of fame. The she creature looks like the sum product of an orc, a lobster, and a scorpionfish. It’s a shame you only see her in monochrome, because her color scheme is a startling mix of green and pink. What I find most fascinating is the concept that this is supposed to represent some parallel evolutionary stage of humanity. This is supposed to be a different version of Homo sapiens that never left the sea. Stan Winston’s mermaid queen is great, but I would still love to see an updated and more articulate version of this design.

7.       Vampire Spawn (Van Helsing)

This raises so many questions. So the crux of Van Helsing is that Dracula needs Frankenstein’s monster to power a force-field that will allow his swarms of vampire spawn to survive past infancy. I bet you thought vampires reproduced by biting people, right? Well, apparently they also have egg-sacs. Just, massive, Aliens style egg-sacs full of bat/human fetus monsters hungry for blood. It’s so stupid that I love it. These things are horrible and adorable; they remind me of chupacabras. I want one as a familiar, or at least statted up for a tabletop roleplaying game. Just really try to avoid thinking about the whole egg-sacs thing and all the implications that brings to vampire mythology.

8.       Emperor Tyrannus (Attack of the Super Monsters)

I don’t… I don’t think I have the strength to really get into Attack of the Super Monsters. When I watched it, liquor was involved. Describing it reads like a parody of Japanese media that involves anime, men in monster suits, and giant robots meant to sell collectible toys. But it’s real, and the realest shit ever is Emperor Tyrannus. Emperor Tyrannus is literally a giant tyrannosaurus rex who is the evil mastermind of an underground civilization of dinosaurs. The dinosaurs talk, because shut up, and Emperor Tyrannus in particular talks with a villain voice that I just can’t really convey through text. I think the closest I can get is saying that he sounds like someone doing an imitation of Brian Blessed while having a stroke. Emperor Tyrannus shoots laser beams from his eyes that mind control the other dinosaurs into being evil, and watches them fight a hermaphroditic cyborg superhero in a drill/airplane. Look, you need to see this for yourself. I’m not doing this justice. Get your friends, find the DVD, and strap in for a wild ride.

9.       Witch Tree (The Last Witch Hunter)

The Last Witch Hunter is another guilty pleasure move where Vin Diesel brings what I’m pretty sure is one of his D&D characters to a movie and somehow ropes Michael Cain and Elijah Wood into it with him. Our villains are, in a surprising twist, witches that cook up some fairly grotesque magic. One of the creatures meant to act as the witches’ guardians is a magical sentinel, and it just goes so hard and so dark for what amounts to a stick golem. It’s the fine details that make this construct stand out. The extra limbs let it move faster and have extra attacks, the jawbones around the front form a crude mouth, and the branch rib-cage makes it look like something that used to be alive instead of something that was just magically summoned. There’s so much work poured into this one monster, and it’s definitely a treat to see it at the end of the movie. Rethink your golems, kids; treat yourself better.

10.   Giant Leeches (Attack of the Giant Leeches)

I used to be pretty intensely leech-phobic when I was younger (and by younger, I mean a couple of years ago), but even then I knew the giant leeches were lame. Incredibly lame. Like, honestly kind of pathetic. I kind of like them out of a bizarre sense of pity. Giant leeches should scare me, but these guys are just goofy. A leech isn’t a hard design; it’s a tube with a sucker on each end. But I am almost convinced that the person who designed these monsters had never actually seen a leech, or possibly even a worm. But the movie still treats them with all the dignity and awe of the Creature of the Black Lagoon. There are prolonged sequences of these guys swimming underwater, floating around like hungry garbage bags. These things are not, nor were they ever, leeches; they are some kind of aquatic octopus or confused anemone. That’s why they need our love, our protection; because they’re too stupid to survive by themselves.

[bugheadotp]

Betty’s a serpent (part 2)

(part 1)

Bughead fanfiction

Thank you all for the love on part 1. This chapter is slightly different and slightly longer with a few flashbacks but I hope you still like it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PREVIOUSLY 

“What’s with the Cooper-Jones sign?” Archie wondered

The couple looked between them before Betty pulled out a necklace with a silver ring on it. “Jughead proposed last month”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Veronica gasped whilst Archie just looked shocked. Kevin, who was the only one who could form a sentence, said “Let’s back up a minute. When did Betty become involved in all this? he gestured around him.

Betty, with the help of Jughead, had removed the ring from her necklace and was wearing it on her left ring finger “Since Jughead did” she took a breath “since he transferred to Southside High”

~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~

“Juggie?” Betty asked for the doorway to the trailer

“Bets” he choked out looking between the love of his life and his new family. 

“You got a girl in there Junior?” Viper asked. Sensing his nervousness, he dismissed the other serpents and asked if he could home in. Betty opened the door wider to let the two in. Removing his signature baseball cap as he entered, he extended his hand to the young blond “Viper, nice to meet you.”

“Betty. Betty Cooper” she introduced herself

“Cooper as in Alice & Hal Cooper?” 

The girl nodded “you know them?”

“Hal no, but I do know Ali. Hell the whole South Side knows little Ali” seeing the confused look on Betty’s face he continued “you do know Alice is from the South Side right?”

Both teens eyes went wide as they looked to each other then shook their heads no. Viper sighed then continued “Look you should ask Ali for the full story but i’ll tell you that she’s one of the best serpents we had. She had this feistiness about her that could silence even the biggest of the serpents. Just tell her we miss her round here. Enjoy your evening.” and he showed himself out.

Betty looked to her boyfriend, not sure what to say so he engulfed her in a hug and they clung to each other like they were the last people on earth. Eventually Jughead pulled away and kissed her forehead, taking her hand and leading her to his room. Heading to the small chest of draws by his bed, he pulled out an old t-shirt and gave it to Betty leaving her to change. 

Jughead headed back to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, returning to see her standing next to the bed. She smiled at him and kissed him “the last time I shared a bed was with Polly” which earned a smile from him.

“Sorry. This wasn’t exactly how I pictured the evening turning out” he climbed into the bed and Betty followed. Both laying on their sides to face each other Jughead whispered “you’re so beautiful” causing Betty to blush

“I’m already in your bed Juggie, you can stop with the sweet talking” she smirked moving forward to kiss him. 

The next morning, Jughead and Betty were making breakfast when there was a knock on the door, Jughead opened it to see Viper standing there with another jacket in his hand. He welcomed the older man in and Betty greeted him. “I don’t mean to intrude, I just thought you might like to have this Betty” he handed her said jacket and she opened it up to see the serpent logo on the back “look at the front” he told her so she did and saw the name Alice embroidered in it with the words 1st generation in brackets beside and underneath the name Betty with 2nd generation also to the side. “Your mom gave that back the night she married your father, I told my wife about you and Jughead and she stitched that in last night. It’s called a legacy jacket. It’s like Jughead’s one. Listen ultimately it’s up to your mom but she’s still family and Jughead is family which makes you family too kid.”

Tears had started to form in Betty’s eyes “I don’t know what to say”

Viper smiled “Just tell Ali that we’ll take care of you” the girl nodded and hugged the older man.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

“wow and Alice was okay with this?” Archie asked “she didn’t even like me and I lived next door for 16 years.”

Veronica slapped Archie’s arm “this isn’t about you Arch. What did Alice have to say about you joining?” 

"She was actually really supportive” Betty replied

“why?” Veronica replied

“The serpents helped raise Alice” Jughead answered “her mom worked as much as possible but the serpents always helped out. Viper’s wife used to babysit her after school and on weekends then as she got older, her and my dad used to hang out causing trouble. Viper took them both in and helped them learn the ways of the world, how to avoid trouble things like that”

“Wow” Kevin responded “so how did you end up with your own office here?”

~~~~ FLASHBACK~~~~

Later on, in the same day which Betty had received her mother’s jacket, she and Jughead decided to see Alice knowing Polly and her father would be in Greendale baby shopping. Her mother knew that she was spending the night at Jughead’s after everything that had been revealed over the past few days. 

Arriving at the Cooper house, Betty let herself & Jughead in and headed for the kitchen where her mother was using the dining table as a temporary office. “Hey mom” she greeted, holding the jacket slightly behind her 

“Good morning Betty, Jughead” she nodded towards the boy

“Mom do you know someone called Viper?” Alice stopped what she was doing and looked up indicating the two to sit down. 

“I’m guessing you spent the night at the trailer park and met him there?” she asked

Betty nodded “and he gave me something that belonged to you” she pulled out the jacket and held it up “you were a serpent mom?”

Alice had an unreadable face deciding on whether to lie or tell the truth, she decided on the latter “Yes I was with FP actually and if I know Viper and your father, I’m guessing that you’re in his care” 

Jughead nodded “He also invited you to dinner whenever your free, said his wife misses your cooking”

Alice chuckled “I do make a mean meatloaf. If you met Viper and you have that jacket, I’m guessing you’ll have your own somewhere”

“Actually mom” she got up to show her mother the names “Viper called it a legacy jacket” Alice stood up to see the jacket closer, looking at the fresh stitching then looked into her daughters eyes. “What is it mom?”

“He didn’t explain the legacy jacket did he?” she looked between the two “It’s a really big deal Betty. It means not only are you in the serpents without any sort of initiation, but you have authority in the group” she looked at Jughead “do you have FP’s jacket?” he nodded “you both are in an amazing position with the serpents. It takes years to rise the ranks but you both have mine and FP’s old jackets so you’re effectively the new us”

“So what did you do mom?”

“FP & I were the number one team. We stuck together everywhere we went. People would come to us when they needed something doing fast and discreetly but we would also be the voice of reason. I took care of the books and FP, the planning side of things. He’d have to come up with a ‘Plan B’ then a back up plan for that just in case.” She took her daughters hands in hers “Betty I’m not going to object to you being with them, I know how family oriented these guys are but I’d like to see them before I say anything definite. We’ll all go round to Viper’s for dinner and I’ll have a talk with him” The elder Cooper approached Jughead “I know you love my daughter and I know how much she loves you but if you do anything to hurt her, I swear to God prison would look like heaven to you. Got it?” he nodded

“I’d never hurt Betty. She’s my whole world” 

Alice nodded “good” she turned back to her daughter “Come on Betty. I need to teach you this meatloaf recipe, you’ll be in Viper and Jackie’s good books for life” the mother and daughter walked towards the kitchen when the elder stopped and turned around to face Jughead “are you coming? I’ve seen how much you eat and learning to cook isn’t that bad” the boy eagerly followed them into the kitchen.

Later on Jughead and Betty led by Alice walked to Viper’s trailer door and stood at the door whilst the she knocked repeatedly.

“Alright I hear ya!” came a loud voice from inside as the door opened to reveal Jackie, Viper’s wife, who looked shocked to see her. “My my my, Alice Smith, sorry Cooper. It’s been a while, come here” the two women hugged “come inside” she invited the three in. “Viper, Ali’s here” which caused Viper to come walking in fast from the back room and he engulfed her in a hug too.

“So I hear you gave Betty a legacy” she asked smiling at the father figure. 

Wearing a proud smile he replied “If she’s anything like you Ali, we’d be honored to have her.”

“Let’s talk about this in the den” Jackie, Viper and Alice walked further into the trailer whilst Jughead and Betty stood awkwardly in the living room. A few minutes later, Alice emerged wearing a big smile and walked towards Betty taking her hands “as serpents; we loyal, trusting, and honest” she signaled Jughead to join the two and took his hands too “I am trusting you Jughead. If you’re anything like your father I know she’ll be loved. Viper and Jackie own a bar not too far from here called Scorpion, you’ll both have your own office and be able to do your school work, don’t mistake me letting you do this for me letting your grades slack. Both of you” the teens nodded.

“Come on then, let’s visit Scorpion” Viper said as he was putting his jacket on “we can re-heat the food later.” The five walked out and went to their respective vehicles.

Walking into the dim bar all eyes turned to Alice, who did appear more nervous than her usual confident self. Viper shouted to the group “Little Ali returns” which was met with a huge cheer followed by people hugging her. She looked at home.

Jackie had escorted Jughead and Betty to the stairs where she whistled to get everyone's attention “Y’all know Jughead is our legacy from FP” which again was met with a cheer “we now have our second legacy” she held Betty’s hand and raised it “Little Ali’s daughter Betty Cooper” which was met with a cheer of her name as the patrons raised their glasses. “No one should mess with these two specially not since she’s Jug’s girl” that was met with wolf whistles as the young blond blushed “on with our drinking folks” that received the biggest cheer as the serpents dispersed. “Come on” she turned and walked further up the stairs passed the ‘no trespassers’ sign. 

Jackie led the two to an empty room and opened the door leading them in. Viper and Alice followed shortly after with the elder man saying “We’ll change the locks so only you have the keys. You can decorate however you want. This is your space, we’ll be downstairs.”

Alice walked over to Betty and hugged her “I’ll see you soon sweetie”

“What do you mean mom?”

“You’ll be living with Jughead now” which was met with a confused expression “serpents stick together. With potential turf wars, it’s best if you stick together” she cupped Betty’s face “you are always welcome home okay.”

By this point Betty had started crying and hugged her mom “I love you”

“Love you too Betty” she turned to look at Jughead who was speechless “Take care of my girl” the boy nodded and was shocked when Alice hugged him too. “Well I’ll be off then” and Alice left with Viper and Jackie following leaving the two alone for the first time to process everything.

“So this is happening” Jughead looked to Betty who broke out in a huge smile “I love you so much” and the two hugged.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

“You live together? How did I miss that?” Archie wondered

“Wait skip ahead, when did Jughead propose?” Veronica asked "also don’t mistake me asking for me approving. I just want to know if he’s as romantic as you claim.”

Jughead placed a hand on his heart and looked at Betty “aww you think I’m romantic” which earned him a light slap on the leg and a giggle from the blond. 

“It was perfect for us”

~~~~ FLASHBACK~~~~

With Jughead still attending Southside High, he always arrived at Scorpion before Betty. Walking up to the newly decorated office he noticed something different. There was now a same tag on the door, reading it he smiled to himself and took a picture and walked in.

Betty was changing after cheerleading practice when her phone buzzed with a message from her boyfriend saying he had a surprise for her. Betty smiled widely at her phone which Veronica noticed “something good happen?” the raven haired girl asked

“What?” Betty asked still distracted from texting Jughead

“Your phone, you keep smiling” she explained

“Oh yeah, it’s nothing really”.

Deciding to let it go, the two continued changing in silence. “Wanna head to Pop’’s?”

Betty shook her head “no thanks, I have somewhere I have to be.”

“That’s fine! I can drop you off”

“It’s cool Veronica. I like the walk to cool down. See ya” she threw her bag over her shoulder and started on her walk to the bar.

Arriving, everyone greeted her by name as she headed upstairs. The first thing she was was the name on the door. Cooper-Jones. She ran her fingers over the grooves before walking in. Jughead got up and greeted her with a kiss “You saw it then?”

Betty nodded “did you do that?”

“Nope, but I did find this note.” He held out a piece of paper with scruffy writing that said ‘sorry i can’t be there to see your blossoming romance (no pun intended. i asked viper to make you this. p.s. jughead check the bottom right draw and answer the phone at 5′

Betty glanced at her watch to see they had ten minutes before the call. “Did you look in the draw?” Jughead nodded producing a black velvet box. Betty gasped. 

He took her hand and led them to the couch “Listen, I can’t promise you everything you deserve but what I can do is promise to stick with you through the good times and the bad, listen when you want to rant and be the shoulder you cry on. Help you when you need it, try and take the stress and pressure off you. Encourage and support you but most of all, I promise to love you forever.”

Jughead got down on his right knee and opened the box “this was my grandmothers ring. She married my granddad at 18 and stuck together through everything, the wins and the losses. That’s what I’ll do. I’ll stick by you.” At this point, Betty had tears rolling down her face “Marry me Elizabeth Cooper”

Betty nodded profusely “of course I will Juggie” he placed the ring on her finger and kissed her. They sat content on the couch for a couple more minutes before the phone rang. Answering it on speaker, they accepted the charges and was greeted with FP’s voice saying “hey there lovebirds.”

Betty chuckled “Hi Mr Jones”

“Please Betty, your Jughead’s girlfriend so it’s FP now”

“and what if she became my wife” the boy interrupted

“you proposed already? I hope you asked Ali first”

“of course I did and Hal. She was thrilled about it, he not so much but he did give his blessing”

“Well” FP continued “how’s my soon to be daughter-in-law feeling? Have you told anyone else”

“Really happy Mr Jones, I mean FP and no, you’re the first to know.”

“wow I feel honored. I spoke to your mother, son and she is willing to sign consent and if Ali and Hal are too then you’re free to get married whenever. Razor’s a minister and he’s up for it. Just say the word and you’ll get the official serpent wedding treatment.”

“and what exactly does that consist of dad?”

“um” FP paused “We’re working on that at the moment. Viper has all that we’ve come up with so far, he has access to my account to help pay and hopefully I can get a day release to see you both.”

“We’d like that FP” Betty smiled.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

Veronica and Kevin were crying whilst Archie sat there smiling. “Your happy?” he asked his former neighbour “truly happy?”

Betty nodded “I really am”

“Then I guess congratulations are in order” the three got up and hugged their friends, Veronica and Kevin inspecting Betty’s ring. 

There was a knock on the door and BP walked in looking at Archie “I’m sorry man” the younger boy nodded and they shook hands before he turned to Betty and Jughead “Viper wants to make sure that you’re happy locking up. Said Jackie’s on his back about date night.”

Jughead laughed “tell him that he can go”

BP nodded and walked out.

“wait” Veronica turned back to them “what about the wedding?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thoughts?

(PART 3 HERE)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #72

hey ya’ll, kinda conflicting moods in this survey; the earlier, dreary-sounding answers, please do not worry about them, as i took this over the course of longer than a week.  i was hospitalized this past week and am currently home safe again.  i just don’t feel like going back changing answers, lol.

are you currently distressed about anything?   yes, quite a bit.  i found the gem to the ring jason gave me, but i can't find the ring itself... i really wanna fix it and wear it.  i'm pretty damn upset about the situation, considering how much i cherish anything i've ever had from him. do you like your pop tarts toasted or cold?   i like them how they are in the package. do you like sitting in the front, back, or middle of the classroom?   i prefer the front, 'cuz i can see better and i feel more obligated to engage. what’s your least favorite flavor of candy?   orange do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before?   no. which is worse: living where there’s lots of tornadoes or lots of hurricanes?   tornadoes, definitely.  i live where there are plenty of hurricanes, and the last one we had that was truly devastating was floyd, and that occurred when i was a very young child.  tornadoes, meanwhile, are more immediately dangerous. have you ever seen a black rose?   no, but i would loooove to... do you like pie?   no, actually. if you died right now, how would you feel about your life?   it was a nightmare. do you have any morbid interests?   gore and guts.  bones.  death itself, kinda. if someone were to ask you if you were okay right now, are you?   no.  i'm currently waiting for the suicide hotline's online chat room to open up.  i've been a wreck all evening and google searched something i shouldn't have; google gave me the number to the hotline as well as the option to chat online.  i broke the fuck down.  i've been waiting for a spot to open for like ten minutes... have you ever thrown up from working out?   no, but i know i've been close. do you have any gay family members?   i think i have an uncle who is? would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn?   fuck yes i would be. (new day.) would you date someone who still lived with their parents?   uhhh, why wouldn't i...? would you have to sleep with someone before marrying them?   nope. would you enjoy a night of playing video games?   very much so. would you watch a porno with your partner?   absolutely not. would you be okay with your partner hanging with their ex as friends?   errr... i hate admitting this, but no.  it's suspicious. coffee or tea?   i have a strong dislike of both, really. when was the last time you climbed a tree?
   never; nc doesn't really have climbable trees, just pines. what clubs do/did you participate in at school?
   i was in the art club and shit, what was it called... it was for honors students... what is something you and your best friend say/do that seems strange to an outsider?
   act gay as hecke do you like to sleep near the wall, the middle, or the open side of the bed?
   open side. what’s the strangest rumor that has ever been spread about you?
   a rumor started in high school that jason and i had had a baby.  a rachel is who told the person who told me, soooo i'm not stupid.  i know which rachel started it. how involved were you in the drama of your high school?   not at all. do you like to cuddle while you are sleeping?   all night, no.  when jason and i were dating, i would usually begin sleeping cuddled with him, but would pull away during the night because i got hot. what are you favorite places to be touched?
   i'm guessing you mean sexually?  personally my breasts are very sensitive to touch. do you like lip biting?   again, in a sexual context?  sure. describe your first date.   jason took mom and me to see "ghost rider 2."  i personally thought it was very cute that he wanted mom to come, too. what really goes on in your head?   memories, poisoned with remorse.  i'm always looking back and missing how things used to be.  death and decay goes on in my head.  passions pass away, and the darkness that i try so hard to keep in the back of mind envelops its entirety more and more each time i weaken.  i don't mean to sound all dark or poetic, it's just... how i describe things.  i wish just one person would understand exactly what's happening up there. do other people’s opinions mean anything to you?   sometimes. have you ever just wanted to run away to see who would follow?   i have run away, and nearly got the police on my ass. have you ever had a hamster as a pet?   multiple times.  all were assholes. who do you really need in your life?   jason.  yet he's not here. way down in there’s any part of you sad at all?   all parts of me are sad. what’s your favorite type of insect?   i really love butterflies, moths, dragonflies, ladybugs... is there anything worrying you right now? if so, have you talked to anyone about it?   when am i not worried...  i'm so scared jason won't come back.  the last person i talked to about it was virginia, his mom.  i was suicidal last night and was very, very sincerely contemplating killing myself, and i wanted to talk to him, because i feel like he's the only one who can talk me out of it.  so i found their number and called their house past midnight.  i talked to virginia; jason had just gone to bed, and she didn't want to wake him up.  she's such a sweet woman...  she tried so hard to help, but it was all in vain. apart from sleeping, what do you plan to do tonight?   cry, i'm sure. does anyone see you as a role model?   i'm certain that's a no. what is something that you’ve recently learned?   it's very likely i have bpd. what is your most expensive possession?   the laptop jason gave me... but it's broken right now. what’s the worst sickness you’ve ever had?   aside from mental illness, the worst physical illness was just a REALLY bad stomach virus.  i've never even had the flu. are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day?
   if i ever get married... then yeah.  it's one of my fairytales. what kind of music do you tend to like?   heavy metal, some harder rock. do you have any mental disorders?   and they're going to kill me. do you believe everything happens for a reason?   fuck that. do you know anyone who married their high school sweetheart?   yes. do you live in the moment?   i live in the past. how many more minutes until you will next eat?   i should've eaten an hour ago.  but i'm too upset to be hungry. what do/did you normally get detentions for?   i only ever got detention for too many tardies. what do you currently hear?   "i don't love you" by my chemical romance, my typing, my sniffling, and my heart pounding in my head. do you ever worry about what the world will be like when you have kids?   i won't have kids anyway.  i don't even know why i'm spending my time doing this survey.  i'm procrastinating on looking for any sleeping pills in the house.  i'm done. do you like the band a skylit drive?   i like their cover of "love the way you lie" who’s someone you want to see right now?   jason.  he could stop this.  i know he could. have you ever been stung by anything?   no, i haven't. have you ever parked in a handicapped spot when you weren’t supposed to?   no, i fucking hate people who do that. are you paranoid?   only always. (next week) are you currently learning from anyone how to play any instruments?   nope. would you rather be able to teleport or freeze time? which one seems best?   hmmm.  teleport, i guess. do you like soda pop? if so, which is your favorite and least favorite?   i sadly do.  i loooove mountain dew, and i really hate pepsi. does it annoy you when surveys ask questions about controversial topics, or do you like arguing your point?   i like controversial questions, honestly.  i like making a point. are there any specific piercings you would never, ever get done?   the only piercing i would never get, even for a ludicrous amount of money, is around my private area.  nope. assuming you had sufficient funds, would you be capable of living alone, paying bills and looking after yourself properly?   honestly, no.  probably not. do you know anyone who had to have tubes put in their ears as a baby?   meeee! were either of your parents baptized?   idk the last concert that you were at, was there a mosh pit?   ha ha omg, a mosh pit at an alice cooper concert in north carolina... that'd be a sight to see. does your bathroom have a theme to it?   nope. when you are eating fast food, do you tend to get burgers or chicken?   burgers, almost always. are you self-conscious of your smile?   yes, because my eyes squint. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?   writing.  sometimes drawing. what color do you really want to dye your hair?   GRAY.  mom won't let me. :( sunrise or sunset?   sunset is prettier, imo. what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?   i love some of the petnames colleen calls me, honestly.  it's just sweet. what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.   socks suck.  period.  i avoid them at all costs. have you ever shaved in the kitchen sink?   how flexible you think i am, fam? do you play the wii?   very rarely. be honest, did fifty shades of grey arouse you in any way?   i didn't read/watch it, and i have no plans to. do have faith in yourself?   lmao did you parents know what gender you were before you were born?   i'm not sure, actually.  i do know, however, everyone first thought i was a boy; i always had my legs crossed in the ultrasound.  mom, however, "knew" i was a girl. does your mother still take care of you if you get ill?   not really.  like i guess if i called her to get me some ginger ale or something, she'd do it, but i kinda just take care of myself. is there a certain topic that you struggle to talk about, because it makes you feel uncomfortable?   not really. if you’re not in college, why?   because i mentally cannot handle the stress it causes. do you try to avoid burping in public, or are you open about it?  after all, it is a normal bodily function.   i'm very discreet about it normally, just because of social standards.  around family and very close friends, i don't give a shit. do you like regular peppermint candy canes, or do you prefer different flavored ones [fruits, bubble gum, cinnamon, etc.]?   i like the fruity flavors. what do you think is the dumbest / tackiest piercing?   i don't really know. have you ever requested a song on the radio?   no. would you ever dye your hair black?   i have before and i loved it. when did you last see the person you love/like? when will you next see them?   i saw him yesterday... and i probably never will again... is there a member of the opposite sex on your mind atm? do you think that person will be thinking about you too?   he always is, and i can absolutely guarantee he's not thinking about me. do you know the star sign of the last person you kissed?   he's an aquarius, like me. what’s the naughtiest thing you’ve ever done, and you got away with it?   got sexual on my parents' bed, i guess. who was the last person of the opposite sex to make you smile? are you attracted to that person?   jason, and yeah... do you currently have any medicine in your bag / purse / etc? if so, what kind?   no, i'm not allowed to.  i overdosed the other day. what do you like on your pasta / noodles? sauce, butter, grated cheese, etc.?   sauce, always. are you weary of displaying signs of affection for your significant other around adults? why or why not?   no, because love should be very openly celebrated. do you think teenagers can be in love?   absolutely.  i was and still am now from the same relationship as an adult. how fast does your mood change?   0-100 real quick, boo. at this moment in time if you HAD to have someone’s name tattooed on you who’s would it be?   uhhh... literally no one's.  i just wouldn't.  well uh, i guess if it was life or death, uhhh... probably jason's, honestly??  but realistically, i never would get anyone's?? what’s your all-time favorite COMEDY movie?   hm.  maybe "white chicks" or "rush hour 2" how old is your most recent ex?   he's 23. how many keys are on your key chain?   two how does your hair look right now?   it's all big and suuuuper curly!!!  chelsea did it. :D does your house have a white picket fence?   nope. do you wear bracelets?   no, never. when was the last time you had sex?   never. #regret do you have a wild side?   only j's seen it, honestly... heh. what is your favorite thing about going to your grandma’s house?   literally.  nothing. who did you last have an alcoholic drink with?   chelsea.  good day. where do you plan on living within the next few years?   probably the same 'ole north carolina. do you have an addiction?   debatably the internet, but i honestly consider it more of a dependence. if you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?   2016, absolutely. do you believe you should change who you are for the person you love?   to a degree, sure. when you’re home alone, do you still keep the door closed when you shower?   the bathroom door is open, my room door is closed. do you currently have a hickey?   i wish ha ha. now your cell phone, what color is it?   black. how many times have you gotten into a argument with the last person you kissed?   plenty of times. what color is your hair?   ruby red, with redder highlights and brown roots coming in. your parents are divorced/married/separated?   divorced have you ever let someone be your everything?   and i'm a broken person because of it. do you think that you’re good enough for the one you like?   no.  he made it clear i deserve to suffer for giving up. have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?   ahhh, yes. (: have you ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend who was depressed?   no. do you like sitting on the inside or outside of a restaurant booth?   inside.  feel safer/cozier. have you ever had sex or something like it?   something like it, sure, but not actual sex. have you ever worn fishnets?   i don't think so... but maybe for dance? do you always wear your seat belt?   yep. have you ever liked someone much older than you?   not seriously. are there any diseases/health problems that run in your family?   oh god.  heart disease, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, asthma, cancer, depression, bipolarity, more shit i'm forgetting... do you have asthma?   no. are tongue piercings slutty?   ... no? last person to take off your pants, besides you?   jason. when you get colds, do you use nasal spray to help get your nose unstuffy?   yep. what’s your second favorite color?   pink, probably. how many times have you been so drunk you didn’t remember the night before?   never. what sexual kinks do you personally enjoy, if any?   i actually had to look up some kinks bc idk if some things are considered kinks or not?  evidently even something as common as spanking is, and i'm into that very mildly.  anr (i think that's be abbreviation, probably wrong...) is something that's like guaranteed to turn me on.  i also like feeling/acting sexually submissive in general, but i deeefinitely wouldn't consider it to the point of the dom/sub kink. ever faked an orgasm?   no. own some type of work out machine?   not anymore. ever wanted to be a vet?   i did as a child, yes. ever flashed someone you liked?   i maybe have to jason, while alone with him, but even then i'm not certain i ever have. ever had a job? if so, what and for how long?   first job i had for a month or two.  second, like, four days. do you have a favorite sexual position, even if you’re a virgin?   missionary is all i've ever tried and i'm fine with that. ever done oral? with how many people?   yes, one. what condom brand do you use?   i don't use them because i don't have sex.  on the one occasion jason bought condoms just to be safe in case we chose to, i'm not sure what brand he got... do you use flavored/scented/glow-in-the-dark/neon/ribbed condoms?   again, i don't use them, but also once more, on the one occasion jason bought some, they were just normal. what about facebook - do your grandparents use facebook?   my maternal grandmother does. do you have any text messages from your ex, or have you deleted them all?   no.  the phone i've had i got after the breakup, so. tell me 3 facts about the first person you had a relationship with.   i've "dated" three people, but i've definitely only had a romantic relationship with one, so i'm using him in this question.  he loves games of all kinds, he's a huge joker (particularly heath ledger's) fan, and he's studying computer engineering/he's in his last semester. think about your last ex. do you still find him/her attractive?   he's very handsome, yes. do you regret kissing the last person you kissed?   i never will. have you ever wanted to be a teacher?   nope. if someone were to ask you out right now, would you say yes?   the only person i'd say yes to would be jason. what was the last thing you took medication for?   my tremors. if someone offered you sex right now, how would you respond?   again, i'd only yes to jason. do you think you’ve found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?   i don't think i found the person, i know i did.  yet i can't. be honest, what do you want more than anything at this moment in time?   i just want to cuddle with jason. have you had any conversations recently that made you feel uncomfortable or upset?   i talked to jason, face-to-face, two days ago to assist me in gaining closure.  very long story short, i was quiiite upset after he left. what’s the farthest away from home you have ever been?   michigan the last person you had a thing with calls wanting to hang out. what do you do?   say "of course!" in probably the most excited voice ever. what is your favorite shade of blue?   hmm.  navy, i assume. what ozzy lyric describes you best?   a suRVEY QUESTION REGARDING MY FAVORITE ARTIST???  HELL YEAH!!  anyway, i've felt a resonance with "you don't have to leave the lights on; i'm so used to being blind" from "tomorrow" for many years. what was the most important decision you made that screwed up your life the most?   giving up on just that: life. what is love really about?   it's science, but also something inexplicable.  it's the perfect combination of your brain's "happy hormones," and only that one person can achieve that certain mixture.  granted, there are different kinds of love, and each one is unique. what metallica lyric most describes your life?   wHO FUCKING WROTE THIS, ANOTHER QUESTION W/ ANOTHER FAVORITE ARTIST???  I WANNA MARRY THE SURVEY MAKER PLS.  um anyway let's see, i could really list a few.  first, i wanna say i feel a VERY strong connection to "the unforgiven ii" as a whole; all the lyrics mean very much to me.  but if you want a particular lyric, these couple mean the world: "how can i be lost, if i've got nowhere to go? / and how can i blame you, when it's me i can't forgive?" from "the unforgiven iii"  omgggg i could keep going on ;-; ever been to ozzfest?   girl, I WISH. what's the most illegal thing you've done?   just downloading music.  wait actually, probably downloading an expensive program illegally. ever have a tornado in your town?   i don't think so. what percentile of your class were you in?   idk about numbers, but the very top.  i got an award for it.  idk what ever happened... can you name every place you've ever had sex?   i've never had sex, but i've gotten sexual on my bed, his bed, the floor, the couch, the chaise... what forms of birth control have you used?   abstinence is... pretty flawless. handcuffs or rope :D?   errr, i'm guessing you're addressing being tied up sexually?  i'm... kinda into the idea of being handcuffed to something, maybe. *shrugs* ever grown any plants before? what were they?   habaneros, zinnias, sunflowers... how many times did you intentionally start to commit suicide?   three.  i was going to slit my throat on two occasions, and on the last, i overdosed. what is your favorite cover song?   "hurt" by johnny cash.  "another brick in the wall" by korn is a close second. ever raise a child that wasn't your own for more than 3 months?   nope. strangest medical procedure ever performed on you?   idk, i guess just getting tubes put in my ears. if you ever got a tattoo, where would you get it?   i already have three and want loads more like... everywhere.  most specifically though, i think sternum tattoos are drop-dead gorgeous. could you ever go vegetarian?   no.  i enjoy meat too much. how do you fall asleep? [i.e, listening to music, reading, daydreaming…]   just thinking... have you ever been chased by bees?   omg no. what is your opinion on homosexuality?   it's a mutation, but that does not make it wrong. what is your biggest fear in life?   being alone in life.  not being able to function properly in the "real world" is a close second. when was the last time you kissed someone?   2015 are you sick quite often or hardly at all?   hardly at all.  proud of that 'ole immune system. has anyone suspected you of being a different sexuality?   apparently. do you like chocolate or vanilla cake more?   chocolate, definitely. does it bother you to have blood drawn or not so much?   no, but i actually have noticed something: it began to bother me ever so slightly more after jason passed out from me getting my blood taken that one time.  i think it's because of how i look up to and see him in general, seeing him react to something like that, a part of my brain wants to believe "omg that has to be dangerous then."  but in general, i don't really have issue with getting my blood drawn. who would you say is your best friend at the moment?   colleen.  always. how long have you two been best friends?   over two years. do you sometimes think you aren’t as fortunate as others?   it's not something i dwell on, but i know i'm not. have you ever tried opening your eyes under water?   i have, and i'm bad at it. have you ever been admitted to the hospital?   only six times. what would you say is your favorite type of flower?   tiger lilies, i think. how old is your pet?   teddy is ten, cali isss... three, i think, bentley's not even a year, and lexi is around two, probs. do you listen to artists who consist more of guys, girls, or both?   i seem to prefer male artists. what’s your first tattoo?   a semicolon butterfly on my right wrist. what song do you listen to when you’re sad?   "perfectly flawed" by otep is common.  hence my tattoo. <3 is there a person in your life that can always make you smile?   not anymore. are you scared about the end of the world?   not really, because i don't think i'll be around to see it. will you ever get a tattoo?   i have three and want more.  my next tattoo will be an adaptation of "denialism" by deviantart's tatchit.  look it up, it is honestly a phenomenal work of art. when you get yelled at, do you yell back or let it go?   well first, i get triggered.  yelling triggers memories of my parents fighting so much.  odds are, i'll yell back, but it really depends. do you share a computer with your siblings?   nooo. do you have mood swings?   badly. do you have any bruises on you?   yes, from getting my blood drawn so much recently.  the iv left a good one. have you had sex today?   girl, i wish. has the last person you kissed ever made you cry?   plenty of times. be honest with yourself, are you proud of your actions?   some yes, some no.  it just.  varies.  for the most part, i guess so, like i can't deny i'm a fighter, but i just feel weak sometimes. if you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be?   honestly, i would get a tiny heart on the side of my face if it wasn't for societal standards and the strong odds of unemployment for having a tat on my face. what is something you find romantic?   flowers, picnics, walks in the park, oh man, i could go on for HOURS.  you can make SO many things romantic. what makes you attracted to the person you like right now?   his personality. what, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?   rape is #1 for me.  just don't. would you rather live in a castle or a spaceship?   castle, hell yeah!! has someone ever made you a build-a-bear?   OMG NO I WOULD DIE THAT'D BE PRECIOUS what are your initials?   bmd, or bmcd if you want my catholic name. what is your definition of “having sex”?   penal-vaginal penetration. who was the last person you were “in a relationship with” on facebook (including anyone you may have put “in a relationship with” for a joke)?   jason. do you think a relationship with a 16-year-old girl and a 35-year-old man would work out? do you think age differences like that (when they’re under 18) should be legal?   they should absolutely not be legal.  just... no.  i don't support big age gaps like that. what do you think of open relationships? if your partner suggested it, what would you say?   HA.  no.  and if he suggested it, i'd leave his ass. would you ever date out of your race?   mhmm. have you ever had a reptile for a pet?   i've had one lizard, two snakes. what kinds of alcohol do you like?   only ever tried mike's hard lemonade and smirnoff, and both are fine. did you have a swing set when you were a kid?   yup. state you most want to visit?   utah.  fucking gorgeous. were you popular in high school?   definitely not. would you rather be blind or deaf?   blind, definitely.  i once asked jason this and he said blind, too, "because i have to be able to hear your voice." ;;;-;;; where do you want to live when you are old?   in the mountains, in the woods, in the chilly weather, pls. have you ever been in love?   absolutely.  with reckless abandon. have you ever caught a fish?   many many times. what was your most recent ex’s middle name?   alex. do you put anything weird on your scrambled eggs? (like syrup)   just hot sauce. what is your states minimum wage?   $7.25, save us.