#i am just WRITING about FICTIONAL demons eating FICTIONAL humans for fun. and kissing a bit they do that too

[burningcheese-merchant]

Sooo, I have a thought from an ask i saw about yandere beasts towards the ancients...

What if the Beasts became yandere towards YOU instead?

Although, the Ancients have the same feeling too, which may lead to high tensions in the air.

What would YOU in that scenario?

-A Self-Aware/Yandere lover Anon

Wait, me? Me specifically? Merchant? The person answering this ask? That's certainly an interesting thought...

If the Beasts became yanderes towards me, then I would fucking panic lol. I don't condone this kind of behavior irl, it's fun to write fictional crazy people but nobody wants to endure ACTUAL crazy people. Stalkers are sick and dangerous and need to be put away, and it's a damn shame it's not taken seriously by law enforcement anywhere (not until it escalates to violence, anyway, unfortunately)

With that said, let's terrorize Merchant for a little bit

IF THE BEASTS ARE STILL JUST COOKIES:

Step on them immediately, they're like 3 inches tall wait, would that work? They have powers and are crazy strong. What can they actually do against humans? Would stepping on them just break my fucking foot?

Send my dog after them no wait, I don't want them to hurt my dog. I love my dog very much. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to him. I'd never forgive myself if I let him try to eat them and he just got turned into flour or something

Pour milk on them ONE OF THEM IS MADE OF MILK ALREADY GODDAMN IT

Hide the box of cookies I like to get from the store, because they probably wouldn't appreciate the fact that I love to eat cookies (they're just like this 🍪 but still)

Try to trap them in the fridge momentarily, hope they don't destroy my nice fridge

Make a deal where they are allowed to live in and explore my house provided they damage nothing and hurt no one

Give them head scratches (especially Spice, his head looks Very Scratchable)

Give them tiny little kisses if they behave themselves (however, if I give one a kiss, I have to give them ALL kisses, or else the other 4 will retaliate against me out of jealousy)

I will also allow them to sit on my shoulders if they behave themselves and don't try to yank on my hair or my ears or something

Wait, do cookies know what sex is? Are they capable of sexual feelings? If so, how do they deal with them? Do they have the... equipment for that? WHAT IF THEY TRY TO HUMP MY FINGERS OR SOMETHING OH GOD-

Contact federal authorities and hope that they believe me when I say superpowered talking cookies are in my house, so they can come take them away and perhaps experiment on them

Probably never sleep again because there's a batch of little satanic cookies in my house that all want to fuck me for some reason (I'm ugly and a normie, wtf did I do to deserve this 💀)

IF THE BEASTS ARE HUMAN:

immediate death

panic x10000000000

I hc Spice as being at least 6'5''/198cm and 200+/90+ lbs/kg so I'm cooked 7 ways to Sunday just with him

Seriously I'm just a short nerd irl. Assuming they still have their powers, my life is literally over

Do everything in my power to convince them all my loved ones are dead so they don't go harm them out of jealousy (ESPECIALLY my SO, God have mercy, I'll probably have to tell him to go hide in his home country for a while)

Try to barricade myself in a church, hope that the "demons cannot set foot on hallowed ground/in God's house" rule applies to them, beg God to save my sorry ass while they try to break in and drag me back out

Can't call the cops because A) stalking and harassment are not taken seriously by police, B) they won't believe me when I say that 5 supervillains are trying to kidnap and marry me, C) by the time they realize I'm telling the truth, they will already have been hanged/put into a coma/beheaded/turned to flour/cut up into salt cubes

I actually only like men irl so I am in deep trouble with Flour and Sugar especially

Try to flee the country (probably won't work but I'll try anyway and hope they don't get too mad about it), hide out in the Yukon or some bumfuck nowhere village in Russia, I'd rather face a polar bear than these guys

Probably still be forced to let them live in my house in exchange for peace and obedience

...I don't know if tiny head scratches and kisses would cover it this time

Hope that they're all possessive enough to only harass me one at a time, instead of... more than one at a time, because that counts as sharing and yanderes don't really like doing that

Try to pit them against each other constantly. If they're too focused on arguing about who I belong to or whatever, then they can't focus on tormenting me

Would like to try to stab or shoot them but idk if conventional weaponry works on them at all

If I HAD TO pick one to say yes to, it would be Burning Spice. He is sexy af. Then, hopefully, I can weaponize this and get him to defend me from the others

IF THE ANCIENTS LIKED ME TOO, BUT WERE NORMAL:

Yay, sanity. I'll tell them to PLEASE get the Beasts away from me. They can sort out whatever they feel towards me later, we've got a bigger problem on our hands than that

COOKIES: I will keep them safe in my house under the same conditions as the Beasts: behave and do not harm anyone or anything

HUMANS: Look, can I just... send them back? How did any of these guys get here, anyway? Can I please just shove them back through the portal or whatever they used to get here? Even if I wasn't taken, I don't think I'd have the strength or patience to put up with anyone's shit. Can we just be friends? I'd love to be friends. I need a mom friend like Hollyberry in my life

If necessary, I am picking Dark Cacao. Seriously, I love my big, strong men. Merchant is a basic bitch at heart lol

IF THE ANCIENTS WERE YANDERES TOO:

Are you fucking kidding me

Am still picking Cacao, fuck all of you

[gingerbreadmonsters]

reminder: it's not technically cannibalism if they're not the same species 👍

[pokenimagines]

Okay okay okayyy, so I read that you do AUs so like, cold I ask for a Demon!Raihan x reader, where maybe he live disguised as a human and after being in a relationship for a while he feels the need to tell his s/o and he is scared they are gonna reject him? And maybe at first they are taken aback, but love wins? For demon I mean, horns, fire related powers, strength and stuff like that haha. It's completely fine if you don't want to!!! I know it's pretty strange haha :) thank you!! ♡

Hi, yes, hello, this was so much fun to write I can’t even tell you? Like I dunno just describing demon! Raihan was hmmm fun. Here’s some demon AU for your reading pleasure!

Demon!Raihan x Reader: Coming Clean

There were a good amount of things that Raihan had been expecting when he came to the mortal realm. He was expecting some people to hate him, some to love him, some to realize he wasn’t exactly…normal. He was a demon, after all, straight from the depths of hell where he somehow managed to seduce a high ranking demon who let him go to the human realm.

The thing Raihan certainly wasn’t expecting was to actually fall in love. He thought all those mortal feelings had died with him the first go around, but apparently, it hadn’t. He had somehow managed to fall for a pure human being who owned a damn flower shop. It was just his luck too.

Of course, he managed to get into a relationship with them, he was very charismatic, and they soon fell for him, and he was pretty content until he realized he’d have to tell them. It would be very deceiving of him, and he actually loved this particular human with all his being. He wished he didn’t, but he couldn’t help that they managed to steal his heart that he didn’t even realize he had.

So he sought out to make a game plan as to how exactly he’d go about telling them. He had many ideas flowing through his head, but most of them would definitely make them run and hide from him. Finally, he decided to just be straight forward. 

The next time they were together in the safe confines of his horribly run-down apartment, he decided to test it out, “So what’s your opinion on things like demons and angels?” Raihan asked as his human curled up into him and let out a yawn as they watched the Witcher on Netflix together.

“Hm, I’m not sure? Guess I don’t believe in that kind of stuff. Aren’t they just supposed to be concepts representing good and evil?” The human asked him, looking over into his eyes as they seemed to be swarming with uncertainty. 

“What if I told you I was a demon?” He said, gnawing on his bottom lip with one of his fangs. Most of him had been disguised perfectly as a human, but that one particular fang of his decided it needed to stay. Still, most people never really commented on it, thinking maybe he got it done cosmetically or he just was born with that tooth being really sharp.

“I’d believe it, you’re pretty devious.” The human laughed as they tangled their fingers with his hand, turning their attention back to the TV. They didn’t think much of it, just thought Raihan was going off and talking about random things like he always had.

“Hey, can you look back at me?” Raihan had said after a long pause, and the human didn’t know what he was getting at. They slowly turned their head, and their heart stopped as they stared into his eyes, which were typically just a brilliant teal, but it was now shrouded with black all around the whites of his eye. The two horns protruding from his scalp, his long and pointed ears. They could feel something wrapping gently around their leg, which, when they took a glance, was a thin, black tail.

The trainer went to open their mouth, and he quickly covered it, his claws almost slapping against the soft flesh around their mouth as he went to calm them, “It’s still me, shhh, it’s still me.” Raihan said, and the human could hear the silent plea in his voice as he tried to get them to calm down. The small human was shaking as they took everything in. They had thought demons were fictional, but looking at Raihan now…it was clear they’d been very wrong.

As soon as Raihan was sure they wouldn't scream, he let go of their mouth and flashed them a toothy grin, his teeth sharp and dangerous, “H-how?” The human managed to squeak out in their surprise, and Raihan looked over to the side as he tried tithing of the best way to explain it.

“I uh got tired of hell? Came here and didn’t expect to fall in love, but here I am?” Raihan seemed very unsure as he tried to just play it off like it was no big deal

“So, you’re a…demon?” The human tried to confirm, and Raihan just nodded, glad that this wasn’t going as bad as he thought it would. He was mainly worried that his partner would find out and immediately start speaking in Latin as they tried to exorcise him or something.

“Yes…a demonic dragon actually. This is still mainly a human form of mine.” He explained, and the human began smiling as the thought of a dragon being real.

“Wait…so dragons in hell are a thing?” The human asked, and Raihan blinked before laughing and nodding his head.

“Well, yes, there’s lots of different types of demons. You know, dragons had to come from somewhere. You humans always think you come up with these fantasy creatures, but most of the time, it’s just someone caught a glimpse of hell and saw us.” Raihan said with a small laugh, and the human began relaxing into him again.

“You won’t eat me…right?” The human asked, blinking a bit and making sure it would be fine, and Raihan just laughed, his teeth shining in the light.

“Well, not in the gruesome sense.” He implied, making the human blush as they shoved his chest a bit.

“Rai!” The human said, and Raihan just rolled his eyes. He was pretty happy that this was their response, it could’ve gone so much worse.

“I love you, you know that?” Raihan said as he went in and gave them a soft peck on their lips. He was warm, almost like a fire against them, and they grinned into the kiss.

“I love you too, you cheeky dragon.”

[just-an-angel-and-his-demon]

    Aziraphale had invented fanfiction. He’d been writing little snippets of things based off of his favorite books ever since humans first started writing their stories down. There was once that he spent an entire century compiling all of Emily Dickenson’s poems to loop them together through a story. He never shared that with anyone. Mostly because at the time no one else was doing anything like that. They were too busy making original works. And of course, Aziraphale could have passed it off as completely his own. He’d only written the novel based on the poems. He didn’t have to tell anyone that he’d used her poems to come up with it. But he felt wrong not claiming that. So he’d kept it hidden. 

    One can only imagine his excitement when websites like fanfiction.net began to appear. He wasn’t weird or alone. There were others who were spending their time writing things based off of things they loved. It could be anything he’d discovered. There were people writing things based on celebrities, books, movies, anything. He even found some that were a combination of real people and fictional characters. 

    He found himself, however, quite alone in the so-called fandoms that he wrote for. He found himself perfectly content with that. If they didn’t want to appreciate the books he liked, that was on them. It was a shame, but he wasn’t going to be able to change their minds. 

    Through the years, Crowley could tell that it was getting down on Aziraphale. Even in the community of other people who were busy writing and reading things based off of other things, Aziraphale was still alone. Aziraphale always tried to write for the things that he saw were popular, but he could never get into the media. It just was not his thing. 

    One night after hours of refreshing Ao3 on repeat, Aziraphale had had it. 

    “What is the point of this if no one is going to read it?” Aziraphale asked. “I have more practice at writing than anyone on this bloody website. I’ve been doing this before anyone else started doing it. This is a waste of my time.” Aziraphale closed the laptop lid, put it on his night stand, and crossed his arms. 

    “Why does it all of a sudden mean so much to you to have an audience?” Crowley asked. “You’ve never cared about that before.” Aziraphale sighed. 

    “I honestly have no idea,” he admitted. “I am an angel,” he shook his head. “I do so much for the world that this little thing shouldn’t matter. It’s selfish, I know.” Crowley shook his head. 

    “I don’t think it’s selfish,” he replied. He pulled Aziraphale into a hug. “You work hard,” Crowley said. “You deserve just a little bit of recognition. Even if it is for this thing that you do that feels stupid to you. I don’t think it’s stupid.” Aziraphale pulled away. 

    “You don’t?” Crowley shook his head and kissed the angel.

    “I don’t. I promise.” 

***

    Later that night, after Aziraphale had fallen asleep, Crowley crept out of bed and headed for the living room. He opened up his own laptop and pulled up this Ao3 website. By a miracle, he was able to create his account right away. He was careful to pick a username that Aziraphale would not recognize as Crowley. 

    He then looked up Aziraphale’s username and clicked on the oldest story. From there, he worked his way forward, leaving kudos and comments on every single one of the works. 

    Wow! I didn’t know anyone wrote for this! I’ve been looking for this!

    I really needed this.

    I didn’t know how much I needed this until I had it.

    Among other things, including a full essay on one of them dissecting exactly how much he loved that particular one. 

    He wasn’t exactly lying when he said these things. He did love Aziraphale’s writing. He’d always been supportive of it because he knew it meant a lot to the angel. Where the “lying” part came in was when he started talking about the characters specifically. Crowley wasn’t familiar with any of the books that Aziraphale had written about. He hadn’t even heard of half of them. He assumed that they were all older books. Aziraphale had never really liked the more modern way of storytelling, favoring the language of the past. This showed up in his writing as well. So when he made comments such as “[Character] was so in character and I could really tell you spent a lot of time on characterization,” he really didn’t mean it. Maybe it was true. Chances were it was true, but Crowley was only doing it to make Aziraphale feel better about his writing. 

    He spent all night doing this. Demons didn’t need sleep, so it was no trouble. Crowley quite enjoyed sleep, but he was willing to sacrifice it for his angel. Especially when Aziraphale was on the verge of quitting writing. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want that at all. 

***

    Crowley was in the middle of making breakfast when he heard Aziraphale stirring, finally awake. He knew that even though the angel had no hope of actually getting any attention at all on Ao3, he was still going to check it first thing. He heard something fall and Aziraphale crashing around the room. 

“Crowley look!” Aziraphale said. He pulled up his inbox on Ao3 and showed that someone had left fifty comments, one for each of the fics that Aziraphale had felt were good enough to post. He had lots of others, but he wasn’t nearly as proud of them as he was the fifty. 

Crowley did look. He didn’t want to let on to the angel that greencarlene was actually Crowley.  He knew it would shatter Aziraphale to know that this mysterious stranger was none other than his own partner through eternity. It was much better that it was a stranger. 

Aziraphale spent most of the morning gushing over the comments and reading them out loud to Crowley. Crowley faked enthusiasm as if he didn’t make the comments himself. Aziraphale would discuss with Crowley how to reply to the stranger, and Crowley gave his honest advice. That is, what he would have told Aziraphale if the person were an actual stranger. 

Once he’d finished replying to all the comments, he got started on a new fic. Getting this rush of praise had given Aziraphale the will to write again. Crowley was glad to see it back. He hated the idea of Aziraphale giving up something that he loved ever so much just because no one was giving him any sort of feedback. Aziraphale posted the fic proudly, excited to see what this person’s response would be. 

He spent the time after that refreshing the page. This time, it was with hope instead of despair. He didn’t want to run the risk of missing the second that the person replied. Crowley told Aziraphale that he was going out to set up a surprise to celebrate this mysterious stranger. The excuse was mostly to get himself away from Aziraphale in order to read the work and comment without Aziraphale becoming suspicious that it was Crowley who was leaving the comments. But he did think a little celebration was in order. 

He drove himself to the park first. Give him somewhere he could read without anyone bothering him about it. He left a quick comment as to not be away for much longer than he needed to be. His phone buzzed with a text from Aziraphale. 

Crowley! They replied again! Look!

With it, Aziraphale had sent a picture of his screen so Crowley could read the comment for himself. 

That’s fantastic, my love, Crowley sent back.

Crowley found himself in a grocery store trying to figure out how to surprise Aziraphale with a proper celebration. He found where some roses were being sold and quickly grabbed the nicest bouquet he could find. He wandered up and down the aisles and tried to think. What is a good celebration? If it were for him, it would be alcohol. No doubt about it.  The angel, however, was much classier than that. He loved drinking, but with something like this he wouldn’t want to get drunk for it. 

Crowley’s eyes landed on a pouch of Aziraphale’s favorite cocoa mix. That is when he had it. Cocoa and crepes. It was perfect. He grabbed a number of the cocoa pouches and quickly went through the store picking up everything they would need for crepes. 

Once he got back home, he forced Aziraphale back into their room so he would not see what Crowley was doing. After a few hours of work, Crowley was satisfied with what he had come up with. 

He’d put the roses in a vase and that was now in the center of their table. He’d artfully placed crepes on plates and had set them across from each other at the table. The good plates that Aziraphale insisted on saving for a special occasion. Crowley put on a playlist of all of Aziraphale’s favorite music. Crowley wasn’t a huge fan of it himself, he prefered music from the 1970’s. But this wasn’t about Crowley. This was about celebrating Aziraphale’s first fan (who did happen to be Crowley but they weren’t going to talk about that). He called Aziraphale out. 

Aziraphale gasped when he saw everything. He felt almost as if Crowley had gone above and beyond for this little celebration. He hummed along to the song that was playing (Handel’s “Messiah”) and sat at the table. He took a deep breath to take in all the smells of everything. He noticed his favorite mug was at the table. He took a sip from it. He closed his eyes as he was filled with the wonderful sensation that came with drinking his favorite cocoa. 

“Crowley, you didn’t have to do this.” Aziraphale said, though he was very thankful that Crowley did. It had been a long time since they’d had crepes.

“Of course I did!” Came Crowley’s reply. “We’re celebrating!” Aziraphale smiled and took another sip of cocoa. 

Once they’d both finished eating, Crowley put on their dance playlist. Of course there were a few songs that included the gavotte for Aziraphale’s sake, but most of it was more modern. Crowley had been teaching Aziraphale the ways of freestyle dancing that seemed popular. He was still learning to let go and allow himself to do that, but he was working on it for Crowley. Besides, he had to admit, it was quite fun to not have strict rules when it came to dancing. 

Their evening slowed down and Crowley decided it was time for the last song of the night. Crowley decided that John Legend’s “All of Me” was the perfect way to end the night. Wrapped up in each other's arms, whispering sweet nothings and giggling with each other. Even when the song ended, they didn’t pull apart. They continued to sway in each other’s arms even though there was no music. It was, Aziraphale admitted, quite nice. He had never in his life felt so loved, or felt so much love rolling off of Crowley. 

He couldn’t imagine spending this moment with anyone else. It was all just too perfect. Too perfect to be true. And he was an angel. He was supposed to know perfect. 

Later that night, the two stumbled into bed and fell asleep quickly. They both loved this little activity that the humans did, so why wouldn’t they? 

[obeymematches]

**Hi!Could I pls have a ObeyMe match-up?I’m 5’1, female&ISFJ. I see myself as an introvert with extroverted qualities. Bit socially anxious/shy in crowds/meeting several new ppl but good 1 to 1, heart still races but I fake it well. Can get anxious&overwhelmed easily. A bit OCD, especially with cleanliness. Scared of the dark, blood, anything horror but yet intrigued? I love mysteries but let's keep it fictional. Pretty awks and silly, likes to laugh a lot and make others laugh.**

**Talkative, rambly&sassy. Speaks my mind but careful of others' feelings. Emphathetic&good listener. The friend that ppl go 2 for advice. Very loyal to the people I love. Big foodie! Love to eat&cook, will take my partner out to yum eats&cook lots 4 them. Intellectual-studied most of my life&my career is intellectually stimulating. Passionate about improving the quality of life for marginalized communities&always educating myself so I can be self-aware&the best version of myself 4 me&every1.** **I work hard and am career&fam oriented-even if things are busy, fam/loved 1s come 1st!Hobbies are reading, karaoke, show-bingeing, fashion/shopping&playing video games. Likes to be teased by my partner but I wouldn't let them take it 2 far b/c I will tease/sass back. Always make it up after w/ hugs/kisses/gifts. Affectionate, romantic, says I love you often&touchyfeely. I always let my partner know how important&loved they are. I'm crafty&will make a lot of sentimental hand-made gifts.** **I express love w/ words/acts of services too. Basically I give lots in all the 5 love languages lmao-but will attend 2 what my partner needs most. Can be clingy&like to act cutesy w/ partner. Believe in open&consistent communication. I want a loyal partner that will be there for me through tough times&support me through life&I will ofc do the same for them! Someone to listen, love, laugh&enjoy life with. I date if I see potential for a serious relationship. I won't date casually/for fun.** **I do want to get married one day but whether the relationship does/doesn't end there, that's cool! I am Mammon-biased but am open&would love to hear what u think! Phew thx for encouraging long asks, this was so much fun for me to write and I hope it doesn't trouble you and you have a bit of fun writing back too! Pls take all the time you need and take care of yourself. You are priority! Really appreciate this and looking forward to reading it once it's up. Thank you so so much!**

Hii!! 

Oh i’m glad you enjoyed expressing yourself! 

Don’t worry, I take care of myself well <3 

Okay so I was thinking a lot and I had to make a hard decision. You’d be a good match to several characters, including but not limited to Beel, Simeon, Satan and Lucifer. 

But I also see it work out with Mammon! 

Out of the two of you, you are the more socially anxious and the less outgoing, but theres no shame in that. It just balances out the relationship, as Mammon will go out with you on the regular. 

I think he would be surprised to see you fall silent if his brothers are there too, but you seem to be doing fine when it’s just the two of you. He just thinks it’s because he is so great.

Oh he is also a scaredy cat, so this is a very cute couple. Whenever you watch a horror movie Mammon pretends to be chill but really both of you are scared to death. (Levi is going to tease the two of you a lot because of that)

Mammon can handle some sass, so that’s not a turn-off at all! 

He also tends to speak his mind, but he is anything but careful about his words, or at least not until you confront him about that. 

This demon really wants a loyal partner, I mean you are basically his only true friend. The relationship would be like being best friends, siblings, and partners at the same time because of that. 

Well he is not the biggest foodie out there and you hanging out too much with Beel will surely make the greedier one jealous. So make sure he trusts you a lot! 

The fact that you get intellectual stimulation from your job means Mammon isn’t under pressure to keep you stimulated that way. So he makes sure all the other ways are also taken care of ;)

Also he would be really curious about your job. He would probably ask you directly how much you make. 

I think Mammon finds it a cute human thing to always try to improve yourself and become better. He might tease you about that though. 

He appreciates your career-orientedness, I mean you have to make cash, right? 

He might think your job is nothing you’d be able to get in the Devildom though (depends on the worldbuilding we don’t know much about..) so he might be a bit concerned about that. So that is why you need to become a model, thanks for listening to my presentation!

I think you share many similar hobbies, which is a good bonus! Going to karaoke together is always fun, right? he might not be too keen on joining you on your shopping tour, but it’s not like he would let you go with just Asmo. again, jealousy is something to talk about. 

His love language definitely includes gifts, so that’s also good! But you said you can adapt to your partners needs, which is why you’d be good with many. Aslo it’s good it’s handmade with sentimental attachment, thats not very easy to sell so he probably wouldn’t. (but watch out for that)

I think Mammon loves to hear that he is a good boy. 

He’s the best candidate to be cutesy and clingy with, and it’s nice that it’s not a turn off for you. This is the couple that is glued by the hips 24/7. 

As I elborated before, Mammon is going to be your best friend for life, you can trust him to support you though anything, even if it seems stupid for everyone else. On that note, hopefully you are prepared to support his ideas! I mean they are silly, most of the time, but they also work. 

Hmmm I think Mammon shouldn’t have too much trouble to commit to you, I mean he is as clingy as one can get and he also has jealousy issues. You might feel like you are married even before the actual proposal - but I mean it in a good way! 

Theres not many conflicts that could arise in this relationship, but you are skilled enough to communicate your needs and wants properly, and Mammon might not get it right the first time - but he is not going to stop until he steals your heart! 

[aenslem]

What do you think about Adam and Lilith?

im kinda not sure why you ask ME what i think about them cause ya know… i already said i don’t ship them  idk if you saw it but anyway I don’t think about them at all lmao but now i have to??/ i guess to answer this huh

i tried to answer to it a few times already and idk how to do it without going into much details or write it so i don’t get 1246 messages of how horrible i am for doing it just because i ship something else??? like, you ok? so here i go writing a lot which has 0 sense and idk you asked you get it

if you followed me since 2018, since i started watching caos, you would know that i don’t like the way adam was introduced in the show. at all. I am fine with adam being there, i have nothing against him and him and lilith together, even though i ship madam spellman, it doesn’t mean i automatically hate other ships and i kinda feel like that’s what everyone thinks while throwing stupid asks in my inbox or just writing about madam spellman shippers in general out there. 

the show itself stated (and i already mentioned it somewhere here) that mary wardwell lives alone, that she is alone, that was right in the first episode. no adam was mentioned before, nothing indicated his existence at all. so yes, when they said there will be mary’s fiance it was like “what? what the fuuuuck?” so this is the main issue i have with adam being there. if they, at least once, slightly, mentioned his existence - i would not throw tantrums about adam :D

and you know what? it took few episodes, a lot of time when you have just 9 episodes in part 2, so i don;’t think writers did not know what to write in part 2 and came up with this idea AFTER part 1, as we know it’s all just s1 and most of it should be written or at least the main ideas of it should be there in the beginning, if it was something small then yes, but it was not small thing, if so, then i think they just don’t know what they do with characters and what to do with them now, and we can get any possible shit in part 3 and 4. i mean, they have to have some kind of an idea of where they go with main characters…

and while yeah, i can excuse this with “this is caos, when they did something right at all???” but i should not, writers should do it so we don’t have such a plotholes. 

and if anyone goes here with: if you don’t enjoy don’t watch i will find you lmao 

i enjoy caos, i hate it but enjoy :’D it’s difficult 

so, to adam and lilith. 

adam himself is… meh :D he could be more, but he was there just to make lilith’s character deeper, he was… a tool. ok, i always write something is “meh” but never explain what does it mean. i mean he is not worth of my attention, he is there but i don’t care, he was not interesting enough for me to like him or hate him, he is just there. i just don’t feel anything towards this character… if he was something in the show without lilith, then maybe i would like him? yeah, he was nice and all, but also was not?? i did not like him kissing mary just because they are in relationship, even if you are in a relationship it doesn’t mean you go and kiss the other person when they clearly don’t want it. on the other hand he really tried to be nice, dinner and all, he at least bought flowers lmao at first i was really like ready to hate him because i will never stop going about it - he never existed before! and appears from nowhere. but somehow he was not that horrible to hate him :’D some scenes were funny, some were just to make it clear what lilith thinks about something like marriage, can’t remember but i guess he said back then that they will not do anything she is not comfortable with - which is like GOOD, you dude grow up, thanks. but i am glad he was not there to have funny scenes only. 

also, yes, lately i am so tired of hetero shit on screen that anything which is hetero is automatically OH FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE - AGAIN??? so i was not expecting anything here, only hate towards it all :D but i guess, since i was like that, that is exactly why i did not hate it. not good enough to love but i was not expecting anything good, so whatever it was - it was not bad. it was funny in some scenes, mostly because michelle gomez has incredible facial expressions and also, you can clearly see - she enjoys playing with another human being. oh poor thing, give michelle people to play with :’D 

as someone who is here because they love michelle and lilith, i look at adam from the side of how he affected lilith. and again, he would not be there at all without lilith, he would be nothing in the show, he would have nothing to do, he was just a tool for another character’s arc. I loved seeing her like that, not entirely, but most of the time, like she was not doing shit for dark lord, was not preparing herself to meet him, she was just drinking tea/coffee, doing school job, sitting peacefully, i loved seeing her smile. not that mischivious one, or that one where you realize, that’s it, that woman’s gonna kill me bye bye :D but that warm smile, let michelle gomez smile more!

let her play female joker

i mean no, not that kind of smile but it’s not a bad idea :’D dc take note

if adam and lilith would become a thing and dark lord would not kill him, i guess i would not care for the ship, i would not be against it, it would be just there. not my type of a ship… like there’s lois lane and clark kent and i don’t give a shit about them, they are there and let them be, they don’t touch me, i don’t touch them lmao but i do realize how much lois means to clark, so yes, i do realize adam means something for lilith, and i don’t erase it because i ship something else, there’s this thing… idk what it’s called, it’s when you ship something and ship another thing also, or just don’t hate it because you ship the first thing. aham, good thing by the way, ya all could use it.

there was this theory here, can’t remember who wrote it tho, that adam never existed at all and it was all dark lord’s plan to see if lilith is still on his side or something or torture her, good one, that would be such a great if it was real in the show, cause that would explain why he never existed before. and it would not erase her growth that we see, that soft (sOFT?) side of her, that domestic mother of demons/queen of hell side which walks on heels in her own house in the middle of the night to drink some water :D. it would be unfair to her, but dark lord already killed adam and made her eat him, so what could be worse?  i really did not want her to suffer that much :( she deserves so much better that what she gets… 

honestly, life is unfair to lilith so much, she was there all the time for dark lord, she did everything for him and he did not even hold his promise, he just gives the throne to someone who doesn’t even want it and clearly doesn’t deserve it, just because you are a daughter of the king doesn’t mean you deserve the throne. lilith really worked for it, she earned it! she deserves the crown and the throne. she was there for lucifer for so long and he just uses her… and once she gets something nice, something good, it’s taken away so brutally! so yeah, if adam never existed and was just dark lord’s manipulation of lilith, then yeah, it’s much worse but again, he already made her eat adam… none of other characters get so much shit in this show. if they make lilith suffer more i swear i will buy ticket and find them all and i will go to them with a chainsaw. 

anyway, i saw people going miles writing how madam spellman shippers are all like: lilith never loved adam for real. like i have not seen those shippers myself but somehow i saw everyone else writing how bad MS shippers are… like yes, we have idiots around, but which ship doesn’t have such an idiots? like dude, why do you even care? ship your ship and be happy lmao same goes for everyone, stop fucking fighting over something that doesn’t even exist. canon or not? why do you care, it’s all fiction in the end. just because your ship is canon doesn’t allow you to tell everyone else to shut up about something that is not. can we all just ship whatever we want and have fun??? like, if you can’t laugh at your own ship - then honey, you have a problem. like, i will be the first one making shitty jokes about madam spellman :’D wait, i already do it.  you can love something without being too serious, it can bring you joy and happiness, but you don’t have to ruin it with all the shit. 

be smart ffs everyone: IGNORE WHAT YOU DON’T LIKE, block it, scroll down, stop spreading hate. 

and ya know, if you say that YOU DON’T WANT TO INSULT SOMEONE/YOU DON’T HATE IT BUUUUUUUUT… and then go miles writing how you hate it and insult someone doesn’t mean that doesn’t count as an insult, just because in the beginning you stated that you don;t want to insult or you don’t hate it. you do! i don’t really remember what it’s called but it has a name…  

anyway

i can’t say she loved him, he was nice to her, he tried to make her happy, but i don’t believe in love which happens so fast, and events were going really fast in those parts. so i think she enjoyed that there’s someone who cares for her finally, and she cared for adam for sure, she liked him, he was someone who finally was good to her, something that did not happen for a loooong time. so yeah, taking it away from her was really unfair and i hate everyone for it.  but loved? not sure. bUT she was totally ready to give it a chance.

also, don’t comment, it was my opinion and i don’t need a conversations about anything here. you asked you get it. don’t throw your opinions here, don’t reblog to add what you think, make your own posts for it. please.  

[mero-senpai]

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end choose 25 people to be tagged.

Tagged by @babybarrie

LAST: Last Drink: Watee Last Phone Call: Dad Last Text Message: “Oh shit” Last Song You Listened To: Bring me the Horizon: Avalanche Last Time I Cried: A few hours ago

HAVE YOU EVER: Dated Someone Twice: Never dated Been Cheated On: No Kissed Someone and Regretted It: Never kissed a human Lost Someone Special: Lol loads Been Depressed: Still am ✌ Been Drunk and Thrown Up: I dont even drink lol

IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU: Made a New Friend: Yes Fallen Out of Love: Uhh no? Laughed Until You Cried: YES Met Someone Who Changed You: Yup Found Out Who Your True Friends Were: Hopefully Found Out Someone Was Talking About You: Yeah but that happens to everyone

GENERAL: How many people on Tumblr do you know in real life?: 4 Do you have any pets?: Yes, I have fish and they eat each other lmao Do you want to change your name?: I like my name as it is unique and cute What time did you wake up this morning?: well it is 11:54pm so…. 3 hours ago 😂 What were you doing last night?: Was at a flat party Name something you cannot wait for: Finding someone who can fully accept me for me Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yeah, one was a racist to me and the other is chill What’s getting on your nerves rn?: The fact i havent eaten in 2 days Blood type: Idk but probably a common one Nickname: Mero, Meera, Senpai, Annoying thing, Mithie (means sweets), Numchies, little demon, The devil, Satan, Black cat, Raccoon, owl and Batcoon Relationship status: Single and ready to die Zodiac sign: Aries Pronouns: omg this is a question? I don’t care hoenstly Favorite tv show: fresh Prince, Rick and morty, Friends and miraculous ladybug College: Well university, as I’m from the UK Hair colour: Dark brown/Black natural highlights Long or short: medium Do you have a crush on someone: Real people: No one really, I just finalky got over the last guy who fucked me over, but if its a famousish2 person, probably Cartoonz, H2odelirious, VanossGaming and Johnny dep (I’m trash I know) Fictional people: YOU SHALL NEVER KNOW What do you like about yourself: Idk I guess I like I have no idea what I’m doing while cooking and it still turns out ediable FIRSTS: First surgery: Had 4 teeth removed, does that count? First piercing: Ears  First best friend: He died, unfortunately. First sport you joined: Basket ball First vacation: Went to France First pair of sneakers: got these nice nikes from when i went to America 10 years ago Eating: Haven’t eaten in nearmy 3 days so… Drinking: Nothing I’m about to watch: Nothing, I was gonna go back to sleep Listening to: Drunk students outside my window lol Want kids: Yeah I love kids Get married: Not really in the mood for marriage talk rn Career: I am a broke ass student who is somehow still alive

WHICH IS BETTER: Lips or eyes: Eyes Hugs or kisses: Never been kissed so hugs? Shorter or taller: taller because I’m really short and I like a guy taller than me because it means we got a cool dynamic going on Older or younger: Older Romantic or spontaneous: Both sounds fun lol Sensitive or loud: Both or I would drive the sensitive lad insane Hook up or relationship: Relationship Troublemaker or hesitant: What? probably a mixture??

HAVE YOU EVER: Kissed a stranger: No Drank hard liquor: by accident lol Lost glasses/contacts: No  Sex on first date: Nein Broken someone’s heart: I really hope i haven’t, but if I have, I am sorry. Been arrested: Somehow no xD (JUST JOKING DON’T GET TRIGGERED DEAR GOD) Turned someone down: Yes, but not something I’d want to brag about Fallen for a friend: Yeah, it fucking sucks man

DO YOU BELIEVE: In yourself: LMAO HAHAHA not really. Love at first sight: No love is bullshit Heaven: Yes lol Santa Claus: No I was the fucker who went around school telling people he wasn’t real lol

@prince–jam @0supermegafoxxyawesomehot @sassingmaster (I can’t remember others so if you wanna do this, just say i tagged you or some shit xD)