#i am in fact planning on drawing him more . this is motivating me . fanart for my boy oh my gosh 🥹🥺 tysm again 💖

[mobblespsycho100]

CADEN JUMPSCARE!!!! love this guy hes so friend. ignore the bad gold details i just made shit up

OUGGHH MY GOSH ??? THIS IS AMAZING .... OHH HES PERFECT??? TT__TT SOBBING CRYING ON THE FLOOR LOVE HIM SM TY!!! <33 UR COLORING !!! WAAAH I APPRECIATE THIS SM TY :> 💕💗💖💓💞

[emerxshiu]

tw: slight body horror, not much but it still is kinda there (also forgotten land spoilers)

Gemini Reunion

rlly long ramble next cuz i love talking why i did this and that and every detail unfortunately---

WAAAAAAAAHH this is definitly going into my top 3 favourite drawings i made, i didnt think it would end up like this!

i originally had a very simple idea, and well, i can never help myself with overdoing it can i? bad thing is i finished it around 5 am aka i barely slept, but i dont mind it at all, i just have been stupidly motivated to draw like i cant just put my tablet or pencil down for too long. fun fact: this was inspired by a fanart for something unrelated, but it reminded me of fecto and elfilin, and it ended up looking nothing like the inspiration lol

also if you've seen my other posts, yeah, that orb up there is indeed reused from another of my drawings, albeit edited to fit more here, the wings were just sketched as a silly thing, i wasnt planning to keep em but i really liked them. and those dots and lines at the very bottom are morse code indeed.

the two like, things that are between orb and fecto forgo are inspired by the weird like tentacles it uses to absorb the beastpack and elfilin, and also from antares, elfili's spear/cadaceus.

i really need to learn how to actually draw feet, ok i know that the only there is elfilin's with the sock but i actually drew the other one before i decided to make it melt into forgo, talking about melting, i only was going to do around the face, more specifically that chunk you see between its right arm and elfilin's hair was the only one i was really going to have, but then, i made it so the other side of forgo's face is also merging a bit with the hair, and then have one of the fingers of the other hand melt into the neck, and then the end of the tail and then parts of elfilin's legs.

elfilin is doing sign lenguage, it means help, poor guy.

also i really like changing elfilin's hair a bit to show how he feels, like, for example, i sketched him full so the little ahoge he has was also there, but like more stiff to show his fear, but had to erase it due to forgo, i also like doing this with the braid he has, if its like how i tend to draw it, then he a-ok! but here its very much almost undone to show his discomfort, and if its literally not even resembling a braid anymore, just like fully loose, either he was sleeping and the braid was anoying (i cant undestand people who sleep with their hair tied up, its way too uncomfortable), or he's like, really really like not there, like, um bad. i also made his tail a bit sharper and messy than usual.

that light orang-y thing sprouting from elfilin's forehead is based on the horns that fecto elfilis has, fecto forgo also has one here on the opposite side, but that one is more inpired from the horn coming out of leongar's head in the fecto forgo bossfight (yknow the chimera with like amalgamation and stuff)

also, forgo's tail is usually like, folded just like game but sometimes i like to like, extend it? (dunno how to explain) to have more expression and also for it to take more space cuz if its was like normal, it would only really have the upper part and a bit more visible since most of it is behind elfilin. also its not very visible but elfilin has the veins forgo has two in his chipped ear.

i was also going to use the blue eye scheme from when it fist opens its eyes for forgo but decided to go with the ones it has in isolated isles when morpho appears, mostly because they resemble the eyes of the beast pack when it absorbs them, and this drawing is very much inspired by those two cutscenes (Sudden metamorphosis and Gemini reunion ^▾^) i honestly dont know wich one to use for all forgo drawings ill make next, since in that cutscene it looks blue, but its body also looks blue, but its actually pink as indicated by the figurine and cutscenes in isolated isles and the chimera form, and also if you go out of bounds, lab discovera just has an effect that makes it all more blueish, so i dont know if the yes were actually like that or just the effect. i might alternate between them since i still like the blue option, it matches with elfilin.

also talking about forgo, i think it came out particularly very cute here, wich might add to the somethings off feeling, i mean it depends on who you ask.

the part at the bottom with like green and blue is based on the eternal capsule, it doesnt have bubbles in game, but it was to make it more obvious, and also because it looked nice to me.

you can probably decipher what it says at the sides without having to say it, i think its very much engraved into every kirby fan at this point, or at least, fecto elfilis/forgo/elfilin fans

i also made a version with the text in red cuz i couldnt decide, but now i like more the whiter version

i even made a version in yellow, but i stopped liking that one before i even saved it.

also elfilin still has the id-f87 in his neck, its just hard to see, forgo too has the 86 but you cant really see its neck, because i didnt draw it lol

fun fact 2:

i saved it up to 7 times in different files cuz i DID NOT WANT MY PC TO GO KABOOM. im still a bit scared to have lots of layers in a big canvas since the anniversary drawing for forgotten land, it did not explode but it went extremely slow, here at least the canvas was much much smaller, and the reason was mostly in case i need to delete something to not have as many layers or in case i wanna go back, i like to have backups of my drawings, aka a version with all layers that i can edit (.mdp, the file for firealpaca, for example for sai 2 it was .sai2, ah im remembering my sai days now) and a png file to post and also if i wanna look at my drawings.

if you are wondering why its called devilstrain [number] its because i was listening to that song while drawing and didnt know what to name it, in fact im actually listening to it rn as i write this, i really like it

i have some drawings started, mostly a chaos elfilis one, i think i already mentioned in a past post, i think im gonna stop that list i mentioned too since im feeling really motivated, maybe next time i feel bad about my drawings i can continue it, ah my eyes are hurting since yesterday wah

thank you if you decided to read my very unnecessary and annoying long ramblings, and also thanks if you didnt and just looked at the drawings, its undertandable (mucho texto i know)

Jambuhbye!

[motivatedtale-blog]

About Motivatedtale

.:Contents:.

.:Author’s Note:.

.:Summary/Idea:.

.:Characters:.

Motive

Unmotivated

.:Stray Facts and Resources:.

FAQ

Rules

.:Inspiration:.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

.:Author’s Note:.

   Hey, so I've noticed this a long time ago but I’m just now confronting it since I got my computer fixed- it seems pretty impossible to reach the “About Motivatedtale” on mobile, even with the literal LINK to the page (I could only sort of access it through some loopholes in a browser- and the link just took me to my Tumblr instead), so I wanted to compile the information that’s in there into a post for any mobile users who may follow this blog. I’ve got more followers here than my art blog-- so even if there’s not much interaction each post, I think there’s at least a few people who might not have access to an about page here. Changes are very likely to be made and things will be added occasionally :)

.:Summary/Idea:.

 “Have you ever wondered what happens to creations when a creator gives up?”

 Motivatedtale is essentially an abandoned AU with no finished story or a plot. Which, ironically, not having a story is the story itself. It’s a tale about how the lack of motivation (along with other things like self doubt and lack of interest) in a Creator leaves a story unfinished, and with no reason to exist, no story, the AU is crumbling into nothingness, as it is being forgotten by the only one who knows about its existence- the Creator. However, there’s two characters in it that have to deal with that burden of having no ending or reasons to exist. And they’re completely aware of what’s going on.

 At least, the first one that was created is aware, because they were made to be that way. They inform the only other character (Frisk/Motive) about all of this when they meet. They’re a Sans of course (which is sort of a self aware joke because a lot of people either start with the Sans of an AU when creating characters, subtly revolve around a Sans of an AU in a story, or the entire story literally and shamelessly revolves around a Sans. This is not an attack on anyone). This Sans goes by Unmotivated, and is quite bitter about existing.  These characters have no finished story, no destiny, and no purpose. Being self aware of this can be a great burden on hope and happiness; ignorance is bliss, after all.

 What the AU would’ve been if it was “completed” is unsure.

 How the story ends is not fully decided or meant to be disclosed (for now), but even if this AU is finished or not, it is already technically complete. It symbolizes a project that is given up on; a project that is abandoned, and what would happen if the characters in these types of projects were conscious about this- if our ideas existed somewhere out there, somewhere where our decisions, intentional and unintentional, have a serious affect.

 So, if this AU is abandoned, it’ll be quite ironic.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

.:Characters:.

Motive

    Motive is the Frisk of this AU, and one of only two characters that are in this AU. Motive was created after Unmotivated, but the coloring of their design was given up on towards the very end. Their sweater is unfinished because the creator gave up on them due to being overwhelmed with empty and destructive thoughts, but the outline/shape is still there. The sleeve usually is never shaded/effected by light.

  Motive is an optimist, and believes that their AU will one day be finished. They have the soul of motivation, which is outwardly visible and tied to the loose hanging strap of their overalls. They don’t have preferences in pronouns (though they/them is usually the default), and calling them by any pronoun is fine (she/he/they/it..it really doesn’t matter, honestly).  

  Motive acts impulsively a lot of times and does not think of the consequences of their actions…or, they do, but they choose to move forward with their actions anyways. Since optimism is one of their key traits and it’s exaggerated and simplified in their character and logic, it can result in some bad outcomes. The same goes for their impulsitivity. They’re not that serious natured, and act more like a child than a young adult (despite being 18). However, they do make a lot of (sometimes unnerving) jokes that could be considered uncomfortable, but they mean no harm. While Motive is quite intelligent and empathetic, they’re distracted quite easily and might say or do inappropriate things during certain situations.

  Since Motive is technically a new character and was not fully developed by their Creator (backstory, powers, etc), their underdevelopment as a character is actually a big part of their development as a character. 

(More is to be added later)

Unmotivated

 The Sans of the AU, and the first ever character created (which again is poking fun of the idea that people usually start with the Sans of the AU for characters). Unmotivated is bitter and cynical towards his existence and his Creator, and is completely aware of the multiverse and AU Creators. A big fourth wall breaker. He’s apathetic, bored and often paints himself as emotionless and uncaring to hide any hurt/feelings of helplessness. He bottled them away a long time ago.  At first, Unmotivated was hopeful about his AU, but he was alone for an unspecified but long amount of time in his AU, and was driven to toxicity and bitterness during that time. He’s seen his universe grow, halt, and then slowly deteriorate- he has seen new ideas come and go, and is helpless to stop the rampant decay of his universe- his home- his story. He’s overall a pretty lonely character. 

When or why he got the nickname “Unmotivated” is unclear- but it’s definitely supposed to be a pun. He hates the name but finds it funny and ironic at the same time. 

  Unmotivated’s soul is held by a string that is woven into his rain coat. He considers this to be poor design choice but doesn’t really do anything to fix it. He often keeps his soul in his pocket for safe keeping.  (More is to be added later)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

.:Stray Facts:.

• The AU resets (sort of like an update) each time a new idea is added. This is how Unmotivated is generally aware of Motive when they’re created. • The “Creator” resembles anyone who has abandoned or given up on their projects or ideas. This isn’t meant to put people that do this in a negative light.

•The white of Motive’s sleeve isn’t meant to be shaded since it’s “incomplete.”

FAQ (most are from amino since not many people ask here)

- What was the AU supposed to originally be before it was abandoned?

 This is undecided and left up for interpretation. However, based off of the design of the current characters, it can be safely assumed that the AU was supposed to be more lighthearted and cutesy. There are random bits and ideas spread throughout the AU that give glimpses to what it could’ve been.

- Can I draw fanart of these characters?

 Of course! I’d be honored to receive fanart and would love to see it! Just please keep things appropriate if you do.

- Is Ink Sans or Core Frisk going to be in the comic?

No.

 I’ve gotten asked this several times, and the answer is no. Doing this would completely ruin the theme and point I’m trying to get across with this comic. This story revolves around a Creator and their Creations, and there will be no other characters made by other people.

- Are Motive and Unmotivated shipped together?

NO.

 It’s fine as a joke but please realize they aren’t. This isn’t an AU centered around romance and would distract from the goal of the comic if I had that. While I’m not anti-frans in any sense, I still don’t want it in my comic.

- How often do you plan on updating the comic?

  Each page is published whenever I finish it nowadays due to stress of a schedule. I post them in bulks of 2-3 on amino and twitter, and whenever I finish the page on deviantart, instagram and here.

- Is the Creator a character?

 Yes, and no. The Creator represents not only myself, but any artist that has struggles putting their creations out there due to insecurities or other causes. They’re more symbolic and fluent rather than a structured and identified character. Of course though, if there is any introduction of the Creator, I would have to give them some sort of design- and I do have general ideas of what they’d look like. However, they’re still supposed to represent a broader group of people than just myself.

- What does Unmotivated think about other AUs/Sanses?

 Unmotivated has an apathetic mindset when it comes to AUs and other characters like him. He’s incredibly self aware and sees a much bigger picture. He knows characters are just pawns to their creator, and won’t get fazed by any story. Sort of like watching actors in a movie while constantly reminding yourself that they’re just actors. However, he is quite envious of anyone with a complete and happy storyline, since that’s something he lacks but yearns the most. That’s something he wish he had.

 Keep in mind Unmotivated and Motive cannot interact or travel outside of their AU, and no one can interact with their AU except the editor/creator.

Rules

• Please do not publicly RP with these characters unless given permission. This might be changed after more of the comic is complete, but I do not want these character’s personalities to be strewn.

•  Please do not draw or write NSFW with my characters– I am a minor, and a large part of my audience are also minors.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

.:Inspiration:.

  Alright, this part is going to be a lot less formal and more personal. The idea for this AU came from my own self doubt and self destructive attitude as a creator. Doubting my own works and ideas has seriously held me back for a long time, and it STILL holds me back as I’m sure it has for many, MANY other creators like me. Musicians, artists, writers.. Almost all of us have that fear of trying out a new idea or making something you usually wouldn’t. Almost all of us have felt that crushing self doubt when you see someone better than you, and you tell yourself you’ll never be like them, your art will never be that great, you’ll never get that far…so on, so on.

  So, while I was trying to come up with an idea for an AU (which I had actually been considering for well over a year), the thoughts crept in.

“no one will like this”

“there’s enough AU’s”

“you’re unoriginal”

“this is a waste of time”

“the fandom is dying”

“you have horrible character designs”

“AU’s are overrated”

“this doesn’t fit your audience”

“people will judge you”

“you never finish anything”

“this is stupid”

“your art isn’t good enough”

“you’re not good enough”

“someone probably already came up with this idea”

“no one cares about your idea”

“no one would bother with your art”

  And ironically, all these thoughts gave me this idea.

  Even so, these thoughts have still been nagging me every time I even try to work on this, and it’s been taking a lot of courage to take on the heap of anxiety I have over something so harmless. I didn’t join the Undertale fandom for over a year simply because I was afraid of being judged for my interests,, fun fact. Never thought I’d be able to make an AU. I’m still quite nervous posting art of anything that isn’t Mario related for some reason.

  Putting all this to side though, I find the concept of what happens to unfinished and/or abandoned stories and projects interesting, especially if there’s an alternate reality that’s actually effected by your decisions. Kinda like you’re a god. I mean, imagine what it would be like if you had a creator and they just gave up on you, and you’re left with no purpose. Seems like it would suck, haha.

  So that’s basically my AU, Motivatedtale. If you have any thoughts or questions, I’d love to hear them. Thanks for reading if you did!

[grundalucious075-blog]

Fragments and Sparks: My Writing Origin Story

We're gonna break tradition a little and skip some parts at the beginning.

We're gonna skip my mom meeting my dad and eventually marrying him.

We're gonna skip the miscarriage she had with his child.

We're gonna skip the day I was born, and my formative years as a smaller-than-average child who loved to tell stories, even winning first place in a local children's writing competition with my illustrated "book", Zorn the Unicorn and Meal the Seal.

Instead, we're gonna skip to late 2007, being the weird kid who always started a week later than everyone else. When small arguments between my parents started to rapidly become explosive and toxic. When my bad luck of being an easy target for bullies started to come to a climax. When I turned to physical fights and scraps to make them stop with no real success, only injuries that were no longer hidden.

When I needed escapism the most.

I was already drawing: I was drawing Kingdom Hearts fanart (RokuNami and SoRiku were my main OTPs, at the time). I soon found myself with an urge I haven't felt in nearly seven years:

I wanted to tell a story.

I wanted to tell a love story.

But I was afraid to write fanfiction. I was worried that it wouldn't be good, that the characters would be too OOC (out of character), and that everyone would hate it. Not to mention the major hurdle of the toxic lesson of "don't try something new if you think you're gonna suck at it. It's best to always try if you know you're gonna succeed in every way possible" didn't make things easy. But I still wanted to write. So what was a smol bean like myself to do?

I created my own characters: Adam and Turk.

I created my own setting: a small, fictional city in Japan.

I created my own plotlines, my own antagonist and motives, my own story flow.

Soon, a year has passed, and Adam and Turk were all I wrote about.

They were my children. My lovely, simple, gay children. By the time I was a freshman in high school, I had a small binder filled with the stories about the two I printed, a folder with the countless illustrations I made, and a whole gallery on deviantART dedicated to the two. The stories and art never really got much attention, despite the amount of groups I submitted to...in fact, not a lot of mine got noticed except for a Pokemon SoulSilver Nuzlocke story I ran in 2010-2011 (completely in text, known as a Writtenlocke).

I was a little upset, I'm not going to lie. It felt like nobody wanted amything to do with my stories, and I usually got very little to no feedback. But, I had two things that kept me going:

I met my best friend shortly after the second semester started. I was drawing a cute picture of Adam and Turk (the latter kissing the former on the cheek, whishing him a good dau at work). A cute blonde girl noticed it and, with a gasp that rivaled Pinkie Pie, said "Oh my god, you like Yaoi? I LIKE YAOI TOO! You're my best friend now!"

And just like that, I had a best friend who also liked to write. I would try to illustrate her work, and she would help me with my writing. We encouraged each other. Even to this day, long after the horrible days of high school, long after she helped me discover I was bisexual, and long after our friendship blossommed into romance that was killed by a poor descion on my part, I value that time, and I truly miss them.

The second was that I discovered how happy I was. Even with my mother's attitude becoming increasingly toxic and abusive (especially after I told her I was bisexual), I found my happiest moments spent late at night, writing, drawing, playing music, listening to YouTube videos, and chatting with friends on deviantART. I loved the feeling. It lead to an epiphany about what I wanted to do with my life: to create.

It was vague, and admittedly, not well thought out. I was never very good at picking a "sensible" career path.

My mother seemed to agree. She had different ideas in mind that I don't wanna delve into too much, so I'll just say that my current full-time employment at a bagel deli is not only less-than-ideal, but also her getting the last laugh.

We're gonna skip some more bits to save some time and feels; mainly the parts about us getting evicted from our home, my mother's abuse and manipulation coming to an intense climax, and being forced into a college and life plan I had no real say in. Not for the first nor last time, I was shattered. I lost the will to create. Adam and Turk were nothing but fleeting, rose-colored high school memories. I felt empty.

I wanted to die.

One night, I was up very late. I had classes the next morning, but I didn't care. I was idling around on an ancient laptop that my mom got for me (after literal MONTHS of begging) when an idea struck me. I wanted to write something magical. Something with adventure and fighting! Something that still had romance.

In March 2013, I started writing a series of stories that finally convinced me that I wanted to become a writer.

That series, is my beloved KoB.

I've faced a lot of hurdles that I'll discuss another time. My passion has waxed and waned as often as the moon, but writing, in some form, is still a large part of my life...and something that will always make me happy.

So now...here I am. In the dwindling hours before 2018 ends, and 2019 begins. Just looking back at it all makes me feel a certain kind of way--even with all the stuff I left out. The fact that, even though it's all been for one project, I've stuck to this stupid, silly fantasy set in the mid 2010s for over five years, is more than proof to me that this is where I belong.

This is a part of who I am.

And soon...2019 will be a part of that as well.

Happy New Year, everyone! We're all great! We all deserve love and recognition! Let's all work to make this year one of the best of our lives!

Aaaaand even if this year doesn't turn out so great, than it'll still be an important chapter in my life...and in everyone else's.

GRUNDY OUT!

[itstimetodrew]

All the Reasons Why I Like Drew

The Big Essay

To truly celebrate this Drew Day, I’d like to talk about why I like Drew and what he means to me. This whole blog is kind of dedicated to that idea, but it’s not all stated outright, and definitely not all in one post. So…. here’s the granddaddy of them all. Happy reading! :D

How I found The One

So, the matter-of-fact portion: How did I get into Pokémon? When did I decide I liked Drew as a character? It was mostly on accident. I remember I was 10 and getting over my big interest in the Tokyo Mew Mew/Mew Mew Power series. I always had some sort of Big Interest, and it was boring to be without one (it had been Yugioh before and original Pokémon before that, funny how all my favorite things came back). Since I had dropped early Pokémon for Yugioh, I didn’t care for Pokémon. It was old news, not that great, not worth going back to. But then one morning before school I went through the TV channels and stumbled upon an airing of Pokémon. All the characters except Ash and Brock and Team Rocket were foreign to me…and who was that green haired guy? I thought he was cute and needed a rebound anime crush.

By 10 years old I had started using the internet a lot, and so I found out about this new series of Pokémon, and that what I saw on TV was part of the Hoenn Grand Festival, which included that interesting Drew character. Then I found out about what a fandom was, fanfiction, AMVs, fanart, everything. It was hard not to get sucked into a fan base that had so much content and excitement surrounding it! I really doubt 10-year-old me would have imagined liking the same characters at age 21, but here I am! So, the next question…

Why Drew? (Let’s do bullet points for convenience.)

-        He’s smart and resourceful! He’s sharp enough to see through Team Rocket and Harley’s plans more than a couple times. His appeals and battle techniques can also be pretty neat…mostly. Sometimes it’s just a Petal Dance and he gets a perfect score for it pfft but stuff like that Dragonbreath + Razor Wind combo? Neato.

-        The snark…I love the snark. I like that Drew brings some comedy to the show and says what I sometimes think as the viewer (The infamous scene...

May: What’s extremespeed, Brock? 

Brock: It’s when a Pokemon uses its speed to the extreme! 

Drew, appearing from offscreen because he never misses a chance to make fun: Only an amateur would ask a question like that, May. 

(like honestly girl what did you think it meant))

-        Drew is helpful! He’s obviously a challenge and barrier to May, but he doesn’t want to see her fail. Drew helps to get May, Ash, Brock, and Max out of 4 situations with Team Rocket, and his eagerness to do what’s right is cutely summed up in his first appearance 

“No clue what’s goin’ on, but happy to assist!” 

He’s a gem and has a good heart.

-        He’s so talented! This boy is a winner plain and simple. …Ok most of the time. …Some of the time. It just isn’t onscreen. You know, it’s the attitude that counts. But really!! He got to the final round of his first contest? That he got the final round of his first Grand Festival (I assume)?? He’s a STAR. A prodigy.

-        He has realistic flaws: doesn’t like spontaneity, doesn’t display emotion well, not the best with some social interaction, stubborn, secretive etc. He is definitely not a perfect character, which makes him that much more likable.

-        Drew’s motivation and dedication inspire me. He’s so passionate and focused about what he does, and he’s worked hard to get where he is. It’s difficult for me to not want to see him succeed!

-        He’s polite and respectful! Drew isn’t a jerk to everyone, he just likes riling up May sometimes, and even then, he knows when to knock it off and be a friend. Also, when he’s uncomfortable around over-excited fans, he thanks them for their support and tries to make a quick but smooth exit. He could just as easily be mean or look down on people who think of him so highly, but he doesn’t take anyone’s praise for granted.

-        That aforementioned awkwardness around fans? Absolute plus. The irony of Drew pursuing a path that’s filled with glamor and style but being weird about personal compliments is adorable, 10/10. (But it does highlight how he loves contests for the sport itself, not for fame or vanity!)

-        He means everything he says. Drew never once apologizes for his outbursts, which can be a problem and highlights a stubbornness in not wanting to admit he was wrong. But I think it also shows how Drew is careful in what he says and has little regret about his opinions, despite how they come across.

-        Drew is mature! It’s fun seeing him become more mature over the course of the series. At first he’s a typical brat and instigates conflict with May to an obnoxious degree, but by the end we see him and May having nice heart-to-hearts about losing and how to regain motivation to try again. Amazing.

-        His bond with his Pokémon. Drew is tough and not overly affectionate with them, but it’s those little hints of friendship that make it all the better. Especially him and Roselia. They’re my lifeblood. That he keeps Roselia out of its Pokeball to see fireworks? To sunbathe? Adorable. Look at them....

And knowing Roselia was Drew’s only Pokémon for the first few contests we see him, it makes his sadness over Roselia getting hurt that much more important. His small conflict and resolution with Absol is great, too. I kind of think May and Drew’s differing opinion during the Kanto Grand Festival is the same theme that goes on to compose a large part of Ash and Paul’s rivalry. That idea of what a ‘proper’ way to train is to get results. I’m getting sidetracked and wrote about this before but anyway!! They’re all great, the whole team is great. And I can’t believe Drew’s Roserade is making lovely teas for the whole region of Alola.

-        And of course……. he’s so cute. You know this point had to come in somewhere. But look at him! 

Those bright, sharp eyes. Those lovely lashes. That smirk and – if you can catch a rare glimpse – genuine soft smile. His hair, that signature hair flip he does when he wants to seem Really Cool, his controlled mannerisms, his clothes that are way too warm for Hoenn and I don’t know why he wears them but he obviously doesn’t care---- everything!!! He’s so cute and cool and lovely and 

I Adore Him.

He’s a bit of an idol of mine at this point. Some sort of ideal self. Which sounds weird since he’s a 10-year-old secondary anime character who hasn’t been seen onscreen in like 8 years, but whatever. I admire Drew’s drive to succeed, how he helps others, respects their feelings, and doesn’t change just to impress other people. I wish I could be as unconcerned with other people and follow my own path the way he does.

But his flaws are good to reflect on, too! His strict means of training make him inflexible, and I think his lacking ability to adapt is what holds him back a bit. It’s nice to know what you’re good at it, but if you focus only on your strengths, weaknesses become that much more obvious, and new opportunities for growth may be missed! I relate to this a lot because I’m afraid of doing new things because I’m so uncomfortable at appearing unskilled. But there’s no way to improve at something if you never attempt it!

His line about there always being someone better out there than you sticks with me, as well. I think Drew takes a different take on his own advice (“I guess there’s always someone better”) between the two grand festivals we see him in. In Hoenn, Drew uses the idea of someone always being better as a consolidation as to why he lost to Robert, he doesn’t seem too upset about it because I think it was more about the person he was facing. Robert is older, presumably more experienced, so it’s fine and understandable to lose to him. 

But when he’s faced with the prospect of May having a good shot at beating him, he’s agitated and nervous. Scared. Because May wasn’t just a ‘someone’ that could be better than him. He had seen her as a novice, and so the idea of losing to this kluzty beginner girl wasn’t acceptable. When Drew has time to sit and think about why he’s so upset, with Ash and Brock giving him some thoughts, I think Drew realizes that if he comes out of the competition stronger and more experienced than when he went in, having won or not, that is more valuable than focusing on being better than specific competitors. That’s what rivalry is. The end goal of a rivalry shouldn’t be to definitively be the winner in the relationship, but to keep challenging each other to become more skilled. You hope your rivals and friends help you improve, and you want to see them experience that same growth as well.

Pursuing any goal in hopes of being the best will get discouraging fast because there really is someone better than you, eventually, if not now. The most reliable thing is to just keep improving yourself. Hope that your past self would be in awe of what you can do now, and know that you still have a lot of growth and accomplishment ahead of you.

The reason I love Drew so much, and why this essay is so ridiculously long, is probably because I’ve locked myself into a bit of an echo chamber, honestly. Since I watch episodes with Drew most often and reflect on him a lot, he’s become extremely important and fascinating to me. I realize he’s a standard character from an objective view: the love interest and classy, arrogant rival…but after a full decade he’s developed a whole life of his own in my mind. Making headcanons and backstories and predictions for the future is so much fun! I know I build him up to be a lot more than he is in the series (I mean I usually get disappointed at the lack of depth he has when I go back to watch episodes) and it seems silly but…I’m okay with that silliness at this point. I kind of have to be after a solid decade lol

After all, I only picked up art again after wanting to bring fanart ideas to life when seeing a challenge for drawing favorite characters. Is that a laughable reason? Yeah! But do I enjoy art and I’m glad I decided to try again? Definitely!

And I thought AMVs with Drew on YouTube were so neat that I decided I wanted to make my own. So, I tried video editing, and I liked it! I still do video work and may incorporate it into a career. A career – from wanting to put clips of Drew and May to cool music. It’s so bizarre, but I’m glad that started me on this path!

Last year I also decided to finally get serious about learning Japanese which unsurprisingly, probably wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t so interested in the Pokémon anime and my doujinshis with you know……. Drew. Learning a new language is rewarding in itself because I think it’s so neat to develop the ability to communicate with an entirely new group of people. To share ideas and culture and conversation…it’s amazing! Speaking of which – the people.

I’ve met so many people because of my love for Drew. Quite literally all of you reading this. Otherwise my YouTube account wouldn’t have existed, this blog wouldn’t, the videos, the shitposts, the fanart, all the cards and packages sent to one another, the hilarious, thoughtful, bizarre, uplifting text messages, every interaction and friendship online…none of them would have happened. Not that I don’t have bonds built on things other than Pokémon (it’s hard to believe, but some people have no clue how much I like Pokémon, much less Drew lol), but it seems like a butterfly effect. Since I’ve loved him for literally half of my life and I’ve gone through my teenage and now early adult years with this Thing for him, I don’t even know how much of my own personality and experience living as myself would be different. It’s wild and weird. My time in the Pokémon fandom has factored into so much of my life that I can’t possibly imagine what my life in some Drew-less parallel universe is like. Not to say my life would be bad without this fixation, but it’s too much change and I love my life the way it is!

Although this Drew Day is entirely arbitrary and June 12th has no real significance for him as a character, it’s great to get all my thoughts and feelings focused on one date. It all probably sounds ridiculous, all the importance I put on Drew as a character, but I’m aware of that ridiculousness. I thoroughly enjoy it! Drew will likely always be my favorite character in all of media. Perhaps someday I won’t think of him much anymore, but I would have guessed that as a 10-year-old thinking of her 21-year-old self, wouldn’t I?

All I can hope for is that I continue to have a great time with the Pokémon series, and that maybe my love for Drew will end up leading me to new passions and interests even further in my life. I’m so thankful he exists as a character and that I’ve had such a great time discussing him in stories and jokes and art with so many others. So, thank you! Everyone!!

[xladymalice]

Time to answer some Asks! - Part 1

Gosh, cookies...

there’s so much love in my inbox and I am always to busy (or even not in the mood) of answering them... there are way too many open asks....

and I want to thank you all.. every single soul that writes me and posts me stuff there. I know that many of you are shy, but trust me... there’s no reason to be shy. I’m happy you follow me and like my stuff.

It gives me strength and motivation to do lots more!

So.. maybe this is not interesting for everyone, but if you want to, you can go and take a look there <3 (Especially ‘cause I finally looked up some of the older asks... haha...)

@stereo-cat & @sans4life7 Mwehehe! That’s all part of my master plan. I’m going to build up a gigantic cookie army! Glad you like it so much! I’m trying very hard on Sympathy <3 I’m staying super awesome! *sparkles in the moonlight* ha!

Anon 1: Hmhm, I’m not sure why you think like this. There is no real reason for him to hurt himself. He hasn’t got this self-destructive nature like Red. He would try to get his steam off in another way. Blue’s childhood is rather nice and warm, so he had no reason to hurt himself. But if something bad happened... he might not tell Pap about it....

Anon 2: Aww, thank you <3 I’m always trying hard! And if you like all of my stuff, then I can’t be any happier. After all not everyone is into my stuff that is not UT right now :3

Anon 3 & Anon 5 This is a rather old one. But I still want to react to this, since it annoyed me a little. I talked alot to cookies about this and friends and I don’t know. I hope people will not complain about it too much anymore. You have to consider that it takes honestly tons of time to decide on a constellation of panels, scenes... perspective and dialoge for a comic page like in Sympathy. (Since I do a manga-alike version). I am focusing on STORY, EMOTIONS and SCENES. I don’t bother much with the speech balloons for a reason. Usually the drawings should tell half of the story... the text is just the addition to get it right. So... I will try to make it less confusing for you guys. But srsly... I won’t put fucking numbers on the ballons and I refuse to draw arrows every time. IT makes the page look awful. I believed that the color of the ballons would help to get the order too, but I expected too much.This is still a fun project and I have no desire to bother on little shit like that. The most people should be able to find the right order after a while of reading it. So yeah. Not bothering much with this. I am happy that there are cookies like Anon 5 who respect my art and don’t complain about these stupid little matters. It did bug me at first but now I know that I will work on this just a lil’ bit more. Don’t expect too much tho.

Anon 4: Phew. Well.. this is a longer story. Let’s say I’ve got tons of theories how special characters would interact with each other. You will see some of these interactions in Sympathy alot. (e.g. Black/Red, Black/Edge, Stretch/Pup, Pup/Edge) Since Undertale is excluded there... I can only tell you what I personally think. Black and Pup can see alot in Ut!pap. They can read him liek an open book because they can interprete and see signals that others cannot see. E.g. They do know that he’s mostly putting of a nice and kind maskerade and doesn’t show you his true feelings. They are very neutral towards him since they don’t search for a fight with him. Uhm.. I’ve got other ideas too but it’s actually a topic for itself... maybe I’ll tell you more if you ask for it... haha..

@blue4thewin Welp, that’s a fucking good question. Didn’t I mention that my interpretation of SwapPap is actually a very dark and shitty one? He’s a real jerk, cookies. Don’t trust him... (I still want him to toy with me tho... fml). Glad you like my Black so much <3 He’s my favorite along with Pup at the moment. Can’t have enough Swapfell <3

Anon 6: I somehow never notice that I do it this “detailed” ... it happens... hah... as long as you take joy in looking at it, I am happy

@calley-alley-cat & @blue4thewin Thank you cuties <3 Keep practising tons, never lose hope and have fun! It’s never good to push yourself to your limits! Bit by bit you’ll improve and surely will get as good as you desire to be! I’m happy to inspirate you to draw more! Special thanks to you Blue4. I’ve read your asks and I am always happy to see them. I appreciate alot that you show so much understanding for me. As you noticed I don’t work on Sympathy regularly anymore. There’s much stuff going on in RL and I don’t feel good about forcing myself on lining the pages that I’m preparing. I do find it relaxing on doing smal doodles, artworks and short comics. Especially since I’m so eager to draw more stuff about Swapfell Dawn. So thanks alot!

@killikat Heya killikat! *bows too* Same for me! Glad you found my humble, weird blog! I’ll take a hug anytime, sweetie! But I’d be careful with the swapfell bros! Mwehehe! *huggles*

Anon 7: Current status: Blue’s sleeping. So far he seems fine. Or... uhm.. we don’t know that Pup might effect with his weird try on Soul Unification, hahaha ...

@fullm00ny Don’t.. please.. I tend to call him that and it’s no good.. xD (private reasons too, hahaha) Thank you sooooo much <3 I’m working hard on his looks, tho~~ I can only blush at the compliment. Take some smoochies! *kiss kiss chu chu*

Anon 8: I’m fucking sure that there is some shipping list for you guys... HECK NO I DON’T LIKE IT! (Yes I do.. but wtf xD Anon, you should slowly get to know me by now.)

@gootysapphire Thanks alot, sweet sweet cookie <3 I had tons of troubles with the Sanses and especially their heads. I still have troubles with their heads, but I get better bit by bit! Drawing them so much is sure helping X) I feel sooooo happy and relieved that you like my version of Sans since I do draw them different to others. My art.. make them kind of.. uh.. more human-alike? Almost realistic? I don’t like drawing them soo smol. It wouldn’t fit the topics I work with :<

@sans4life7 I do appreciate everyone who tried to save me. Currently it seems that I annoy dear, good Owl as some dirty parasite who tries to steal their Swapfells. After all their miiiiine, mwhhehehehehe >D But be careful... there’s an army of cookies who would fight u for me... hah!

Anon 9: You made me laugh a bit there, Anon. Don’t kick yourself out please, my mind is just as dirty as yours. We will see what Black will do with lil’ Blueberry. After all he did accept Papyrus’ request and took Blue for him~~~ You can dream as much as you want, tbh. Who knows what will happen <3

Anon 10: Fck, maybe I should put up some theorie stuff for Sympathy. I’d like to see and collect all of your ideas and theories, since I’m super interested in them. Something with xsympathy xtheory would be an option. So yeah. You’ve got an interesting idea there. But... I’m not sure if Black truly would accept Blue. I mean... he used to be like Blue yeeeeears ago... maybe he doesn’t like this fact? ;D

@dirty-little-franfricker Ohohoh, cookie. Come here... I’ll make sure you will fear me and beg me for more <3 You know what I’d give ya, right? *smiles* <3

Anon 11: I do but I don’t upload UT stuff there anymore. I kind of focused this blog on Undertale and welp... I think there will be rather original stuff and other fanarts on the other if I feel like it.

Anon 12: Darn right there, Anon. I’d believe in Santa myself to get that present. *coughs*

@soratayuya Damn it. I’ve wanted to answer you since I read your asks. I am so darn sorry to be always so late on replies. I’m happy you enjoyed the X-mas Special so much! I’ve put alot thought and love into it! (Even shitty, little details.. geez) I wanted to show another side of Swapfell and I did. I’m happy that you cookies like it so much.

And omfg. I love your comments on Sympathy alot. Like.. they give me strength to do more and they prove me that I do good on the little twists and hints inside the pages. I’d also be tense and pissed as Black when my fucking slave demanded more stuff from me after FORGIVING his fucking attempt on using SU (Soul Unification) on some random, shitty Sans. Oh dear, this will ‘Cause tons of problems <3

Uhh... Next part follows...