#i am currently writing for my next chapter of facing your fate

[felixschokehold]

If I were to hypothetically open requests for one shots/imagines for the Volturi, would anyone be interested?

I am a little apprehensive of how well I can write them, but I would like to give it a try. I tend to write on the longer side but wouldn't mind trying out shorter stories. I also... don't know if I want to write straight smut and post it directly to my blog, but I might.

Note: I will not write for Alec or Jane as they are minors, unless it is a platonic mate situation. Edit: I will consider writing for the twins if the AU is they're 16+, and no smut.

[imagineinside]

Eternal Claws (Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader) Chapter 1

A/N (PLEASE READ): Hey guys! This is my first time writing for Wolverine... so please be nice, I am at your mercy lol. This is also an A/O/B fanfic, where the mutants also have a secondary gender that would have developed at the same time as their mutations (this is not the main part of the story though). My intention is for this to be a longer running fanfiction, as well as a verryyyyy slow burn :). If that doesn't sound like your cup of tea, then I will also be working on some oneshots soon, which you are more than welcome to give me some ideas to write about! Please let me know your feedback, I sincerely appreciate it!! :D

Summary: At a young age of 16, you find yourself saved from a group of hunters by no other mutant than The Wolverine, who reluctantly becomes your protector during your first heat. As weeks pass and you recover, a complex bond forms between yourself and the powerful mutant who had saved you.

Seven years later, now a confident young woman with refined mutant abilities, you encounter Wolverine again. Despite your growth and newfound strength, old feelings resurface as Wolverine returns from a secretive mission. As you navigate the challenges of your powers and your unspoken connection with him, you must come to terms with your past and the burgeoning feelings that might redefine your future.

Current Applicable Warnings: 18+ (not an explicit story yet, but there are hints of things in the upcoming chapters), canon-typical violence, age gap (like 200+ with a 25 yr old), Alpha!Logan, Omega!Reader, a/o/b universe, more to come.

Word Count: 2,884 we just getting started pookie

It was your unlucky day that The Wolverine was the mutant to find you alone out in the woods.

But it was lucky he got to you before the four hunters found you first, the sour tang of their arousal burning his sensitive nose. When he saw you laying in the fresh layer of snow, your body coated in sweat from your first heat (at least he guessed it was your first by how small and frail you were at the time), and your own honey-sweet scent drifting through the trees, he knew he was already in too deep with you.

“No,” you groaned, pushing against his chest in an attempt to protect yourself. The Wolverine would never admit it, but he actually felt a surge of empathy for the frail thing he held in his arms. 

He would definitely give Professor X a piece of his mind for selecting him of all mutants to go on this fetch quest to get you. Of course, there was no way of knowing you were on the brink of heat with a hoard of hungry men after you.

“The snow…” you mumbled as you grabbed onto the collar of his shirt with what little strength you had. You were so precious, your face flushed a bright pink, an image he would never forget. “It’s too hot…”

The Wolverine groaned in frustration as you pushed yourself out of his arms and flopped back on the cold, hard forest floor where the four hunters' dead bodies lay not far from you now. He watched as you slowly made a circle of snow around yourself, most of it melting to the touch with the heat of your body temperature. He had seen this dance too many times to feign ignorance.

“Hey, bub,” he called out as he squatted on a nearby fallen tree, “I need to take you out of here before more charming men come to find you.”

It was as if you didn’t even hear him as you continued your work on the ground, bunching the snow up to help with your heat.

The Wolverine sighed and hung his head, accepting his fate as your caretaker for the next week in the unforgiving Alaskan wild…

* * *

It’s nearly an exact week later by the time you are back to your full senses. And it isn’t alone, either. From behind you there’s a rhythmic breathing and a cold presence sedating the still-burning embers inside you. All your joints are sore and there is still an empty aching from deep inside you, though you do your best not to focus on that specific ache.

In one quick flourish of movement, you quickly grab your shirt that you had at some point ripped off from excess heat and shuffled away from the… beast laying next to you.

“Relax,” the giant man groaned, rolling onto his back, “I was just here to prot-”

Acting on pure instinct, having just woken from a daze, you reached out and slapped him–hard–across the face. Enough to make the man, who is at least a good foot taller than you, stop dead in his tracks.

You watched as the muscles in his jaws flexed over and over before he slowly flicked his eyes back to you, “Fuck you sure got a powerful slap on ya there.”

Catching your breath, you looked around at your surroundings. There were deep gouges in sets of three on the nearby trees, on the ground, markings left in the general area… the smell of a strong male everywhere. “You were protecting me…” you mumbled more to yourself than him, yet he still caught the comment from under your breath.

“Glad you caught on, sweetheart,” he grumbled as he stood and slung on his leather jacket that was laid across a nearby stump. “Listen, I chased you and those four guys,” he said, gesturing with his shoulders to a group of four very dead men on the outskirts of your nest, drawing a gasp from your lips, “through these woods to save your sorry ass. And now I’m going to take you back so I can be done with this mission.”

“I am not going anywhere with you,” you all but growled as you slung on your shirt in as much grace as you could muster with how your legs and arms still felt as if they were made out of Jell-O. 

“Uh, yes. You are.” The man insisted, quirking his thick brow at you.

“Listen, whatever you came here for, you obviously got the wrong person–” a sharp pain to the back of your head is the first thing you registered as you were shoved up against a nearby tree at what felt like the speed of light. Despite knowing it’s futile, you fought against the hold he held across your chest, wriggling to be free.

“I’m gonna cut right to the chase. You just presented as a young Omega, which also means you are a mutant. Now I don’t need ya’ to show me what you do or whatever, I don’t really give a fuck, I just need to get you to safety since. That. Was. My. Job.” He growled back at you, spit flying in your face with each punctuation.

He must have watched as the fire in your eyes died out, since his grip loosened and he set you back onto the ground, turning slowly to retrieve the rest of his belongings.

“You’re The Wolverine, aren’t you?” You called out after him, just as you moved to gather the remaining's of your bag’s contents which had been spilled out across the ground–a hairbrush, tampons, two small bottles of shampoo and conditioner, and you’re only reminder of the life you once had before your mutant abilities took it away from you, a picture of you and your brother. 

You heard a deep grunt sound off behind you before an even rougher, “I am.”

A shiver ran down your spine at knowing who you were in the presence of… who had taken care of you during your first heat.

“We didn’t,” you cleared your throat as you turned to look at the mutant behind you, “we didn’t… do anything, right?”

“No,” came the quick response as The Wolverine lit a cigar and leaned up against a tree. He must be waiting for you to follow him, most likely. “I don’t find satisfaction in taking advantage of people. Not like those four over there.” He once again gestured towards the four rotting corpses lying face down in the snow.

A gag threatened to spill what little food and water you had ingested over the past week all over the ground.

Heaving your bag over your shoulders, you took a few steps towards your savior–captor?–and began following him through the dense trees, out towards either your salvation or your doom. You weren’t sure which it was going to be yet.

* * *

It ended up being about an hour walk to a beat up old Chevy that was parked on the side of the road. Following your captors lead, you slipped into the passenger seat and watched as the world you knew went by in flashes of snow and trees.

It took another three or four hours–you weren’t really sure how long, since you were in and out of sleep for a lot of it–to reach one of the few airports in Alaska. Along the way, you also learned The Wolverine was taking you to a school for young mutants like yourself, where you could learn more about your abilities and how to use them. 

You weren’t sure you really liked the idea of using your powers ever again…

“Does it ever get easier?” You asked quietly with your head resting up against the window as you pulled up to the rental car return.

You heard him pull the parking brake and let out an exasperated sigh. Yeah, well I’m not a huge fan of you either, you wanted to snap at him. “What does?” He asked with a sidelong glare.

“Killing,” you whispered, as if the mere mention of it would bring death upon you. Flashes of your brother's screaming face play behind your eyelids every time you blink.

There was a long beat of silence, so long that you ended up looking over at the driver seat just to make sure he hadn’t gotten out of the car and left you there alone. “No, it doesn’t,” he whispered back.

You grabbed your only belongings and followed after your captor onto the tarmac, where the classiest and sleekest silver plane you have ever seen was waiting for you. If you weren’t so damn terrified of flying, this would probably be one of the coolest moments of your so-far short life. The second you boarded the private jet, The Wolverine beelined for the crystal jar full of some type of whiskey. You mentally gagged at the mere thought of the terrible taste of that amber liquid.

“Want some?” your captor asked as he poured himself a generous quadruple shot.

You shook your head violently as you took a seat towards the front of the plane against the wall, so you had a clear line of sight of the rest of the aircraft. The Wolverine sat on the opposite side of the small cabin. Or maybe he just made it look small with how his head scraped the top of the ceiling, and his broad shoulders were spilling over the seat.

“What will happen to me when I get there?” You dared to ask.

“Professor X will take care of you.” Perhaps he heard how your heartbeat picked up its pace as your hands gripped the armrests tighter, making the leather squeak under your sweaty hands. “Relax, not like that.” The man sighed in frustration as he chugged down his liquor and went for a second glass. “Here’s what will happen. Professor X will give you a chance to go on special mutant-safe inhibitors for your new…” the man flicked his gaze to you, “secondary gender, if you so wish. He’ll ask to see your abilities to see the extent to which we will need to keep you and others around you safe.” Once he finished pouring his glass, he returned to his seat, staring at you from across the cabin.

“There’s no one around me that I care to keep safe anymore, sir.” You whispered to him. “I failed all of them.”

The Wolverine seemed at a loss for words after your admission, instead he simply said, “Best for you to get some rest.”

And flicked off the lights.

* * *

You weren’t necessarily sure what you were expecting, but a giant mansion that looked like it was born for the Old-Money-Rich generation was not it. It felt like your head was on a swivel as you drove towards the complex. You saw people–mutants, like you–out playing in the spacious yard, in the pond, others in the sky. Which made you suddenly jealous of your own powers.

An even greater surprise were the friendly greetings thrown your way, or rather to The Wolverine standing beside you. You knew he was a well-respected mutant, but you thought it was in the way of “don’t cross me and I won’t kill you” way. Not in the, “six year old's love me” type way. Which was very much the case with the way the younger mutants were running up the grisly man and crawling up his legs.

“Not now, alright,” he grumbled as he peeled them one-by-one off his legs and proceeded to guide you towards a large door hidden in an alcove to the right. “Professor X is just through that door.”

He said it in a way that had your alarm bells ringing, and as he turned to walk away you reached out and grabbed his arm without thinking. “Stay.” You demanded, and then thought better of yourself and added, “please.”

You watched the debate go on behind his eyes, but with a deep sigh, it appeared this gentle giant decided to be your protector a little longer. Reaching forward, you balled your hand into a fist to knock. But before you could, a gentleman's voice called from behind the door, “Come in.”

Swallowing, you reached for the handle and strode into a quaint office room. The man who sat behind the desk was not at all what you had expected. You were expecting the monsters… the men who had taken your best friend… You shook your head to rid yourself of the thought. “Professor X, I’m–”

“I already know who you are,” the elderly man said, moving a joystick on his wheelchair to maneuver around his desk. “It’s an honor to meet you.”

You gave him a tight-lipped smile and a curt nod.

“I can sense your unease, but I promise you do not need to hide here. We are mutants, just like you.” The Professor moved his wheelchair further forward, until he was within reaching distance. “I know you have a power that is greatly sought after. May I see?” He asked, and tapped his head.

You quickly pieced it together he must be one of the psychic mutants, and you dully nodded your head. You closed your eyes as he reached forward, his pointer and middle finger coming to rest against your left temple. For a brief moment, you are fearful you will have to relive all the memories he is about to see. But when nothing comes flashing behind your eyelids, you let out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding.

After a couple moments passed, the Professor dropped his hand and opened his eyes, “I am sorry for the pain you have experienced in your short life so far.”

“I didn’t know at the time…” you began, but a sob threatened to come up your throat.

“You don’t need to talk to me about it, only if you are ready.” You nodded to him in gratitude before he turned back around to grab something from behind his desk. “I believe Logan should have told you about this,” Logan, that must be Wolverine’s real name, you thought to yourself, “but these are inhibitors for your secondary gender which would have presented the same day as your mutation. Please, only take these if you are comfortable. If not, we can make separate arrangements for your safety from other mutants.”

You reached forward and grabbed the small silver tin of round white pills and stuffed them in your bag. “What do you mean for my safety from other mutants?”

Professor X let out a sigh and eyeballed Wolverine–Logan–from over your head, “I see you left some of the harder questions for me to answer.”

“She wasn’t asking these questions to me, Professor,” was the snarky remark Logan bit back.

Professor X began calmly, “Well, you see, other mutants will have also displayed a secondary gender. Most of us are Betas, we do not experience heats or ruts and we are normal for everything but our mutant abilities. However, others are Omegas and Alphas. Omegas, such as yourself, need extra protection such as the inhibitors or being placed in a separate wing from the Alphas. The Alphas may also go on inhibitors, like Logan there, so an Omegas heat will not affect them.”

You shook your head violently, the words becoming jumbled in your mind. “I don’t understand. So I’m some fucked up other breed?”

“You are not ‘fucked up’, you are an additional step to evolution. Omegas are…” the Professor clears his throat, “meant to be very fertile, same with the Alphas.”

“I don’t want this,” You murmured, a single tear sliding down your face before you were able to swipe it away.

“I know,” the Professor replied solemnly, as if he could feel your pain and still-fresh grief. “All I want is to keep you safe.” Your mouth felt like it was running dry, your brain throbbing with all the information. “Now, would you be willing to show me what you can do?”

* * *

You had agreed to show the Professor your ability. He and Logan had taken you out to the courtyard, where a dead and brittle rose plant lay amongst the foliage.

“All I need you to do is revive the rose plant.” The Professor called out to you. Him and the Wolverine had stayed a good few yards away, upon your request. You didn’t need another person standing near you while this happens.

“Surely she can’t revive a dead plant…” came a response from Logan that had you gritting your teeth together. “That would mean she could revive a dead person.”

“With enough power and training,” you heard the Professor reply calmly, “perhaps she could.”

Little do they know, you thought spitefully.

Kneeling down to the ground, you placed one hand on the grass beside your feet, the other reaching upwards towards the rose bush. You let your mind fall somewhere between your burning rage and the feeling of cold serenity. As the flow of life began pouring through your arms, you saw flashes--images--of a younger Professor X. A younger garden. When this rose bush would have still been alive. You saw flashes of a blue girl with red hair and…

You felt your connection snap before your eyes opened, the rose bush now blooming with flowers and life. Revived from its grave.

But underneath you… the ground was withered and dead. The dirt like rough sand to the touch.

Your power. A life for a life.

[fanaticsnail]

You Kissed the Clown? Part 7

Ok, I am currently writing part 8 as we speak but I physically couldn't cut any filler as so much happens in the OPLA to get from point A to point B. I got a little bit upset with myself at not yet reuniting our star-crossed lovers, especially with the amount of words involved. Next chapter, I promise you!! Hopefully uploaded before 1am my time this time!

Part 6 back here

Word Count: 4,358

Upon arising from your slumber, you groggily rubbed the back your closed fist over your eyes before moving both hands to the corner of your mouth to remove any stale saliva from your lips. You adjusted your eyes to notice the rays of the morning sun filtering through the beams of the external wooden shutters. You slowly sat, removing the plush bedsheets from your torso and reaching yourself up in an overexaggerated stretch to relieve any kinks you acquired in the night.

Your blissful awakening was immediately dissipated at the arrival of your tri-sword wielding crewmate as his face littered with more emotion than you had ever seen his expression contorted to produce. He was panting slightly; eyes wide in worry before relaxing into a sense of relief before creasing his brows in rising anger. You creased your brows in confusion as to the interruption of your blissful ignorance.

It was only one seeing your unphased and well rested expression that Zoro erupted into a tirade of: “where were you?”, “were you sleeping this whole time?”, “we needed you!”, “you could’ve been killed-,” before growling, “-we were nearly killed!”. Your eyes widened in shock as you slumped your back into the bedframe, mouth opening and closing like a fish gulping in water.

He paced the room, abrasively describing the events that transpired throughout the evening. You continued to be perplexed by the informational transfer between the swordsman and yourself. You felt your eyes begin to well lightly at the continual berating tirade from the sword-wielder, not expecting to be reprimanded at this early hour.

You flung your sheets from your lower body and swung your legs to the side of the bed and abruptly sprinted to the swordsman and gripped his shoulders, bringing him into a sudden embrace. You held him to you, pressing your cheek against his chest and breathed in deeply as you felt him falter his stance and lean into your arms. He hooked his chin over your shoulder and laced his arms around your waist, allowing a wave of relief that his friend had survived through the night.

“We thought you had been slaughtered,” he whispered harshly into your shoulder. You breathed out and removed your head from its place resting on his chest and uncurled your arms from his shoulder.

“I am sorry, Zoro,” you apologised to him, “I honestly had no idea. I thought you had all gone in search for more food and thought you were all returning here later.”

He hummed and released your body from its friendly proximity against your own, no longer holding a chastising aura on his features.

“I should probably add,” he said, turning on his heel to exit the guest suite, “Kaya has given us a ship.”

You quirked your head slightly with a wide smile coming to your features. Your hands hastily shooed Zoro from the room so you could change into your travelling gear. You collected several tools you were gifted by Klahadore, now to be revealed as Captain Kuro of the Black-Cat Pirates. As you held the multitool in your hand, you shut your eyes; wincing at the thought that as you repaired the clawed gloves, you were inevitably sealing the fate of your crew.

You breathed in slowly, placing the object into your tinkering pouch and returned to join with the Straw-Hat pirates to set sail into the blissful unknown. You welcomed your new companion, Usopp, onto the deck of the ship as he placed a tender kiss upon the lips of your former host, Ms Kaya. You smiled at their youthful innocence before your smile was dropped from your face as Zoro leant into your ear.

“This is what kissing someone that’s not an absolute psychopath looks like,” he taunted you, causing you to turn and slap your hand into his chest with a huff. You turned on your way to bring your rucksack aboard and seek out your new quarters. Once you found a vacant room, you placed the large bag atop a desk and began to meticulously sort through your items and neatly place them in correlating areas accordingly.

You began to reflect on the events as Zoro had described them, noting that the beverage you would have consumed may have been laced with poison. Your eyes glazed over as you pondered the many: “could have been’s” with your interactions between yourself and the unnerving Butler before your movements were halted at the sudden explosion of ignited cannon fire and the impact it had on your newly acquired vessel. You sprung to your feet and sprinted to the deck where your crew had gathered collectively together from their place in the mess hall.

What Zoro had failed to mention in his ramblings was the fact that there were Marines actively pursuing them. The surprise written on your face as you all but leapt up the steps to join yourself beside Nami as she called to you, revealing the identities of the attacking vessel.

“Marines! We’re under attack!” she shouted to the crew.

She made her way to her post at the stern, managing the steering wheel as Luffy pulled his brass spyglass to seek out the identity of the helmsman.

“Grandpa?” he questioned while knitting his brows together. You joined with the other three members of crew as you uttered: “Grandpa?” in unison.

After processing that momentary shock, you all collectively sprung into action as you un-coordinatingly began to ready yourselves for ship to ship combat. You were well out of your depth as ships appraisal specialist, not engaging readily in manned combat let alone ship wide combat.

Nami began shouting directions:

“Zoro, sheet in and hard to port!” she ordered, pulling the steering rigging to change momentum of the ship. Usopp and Luffy were scrambling to load cannonballs into the steel barrel while Zoro began to process the directions Nami gave him, confusion knitted his face.

Nami expertly corrected both Zoro and Usopp in their tasks as you remained halted in place watching as the dooming Marine ship began to gain on you.

The cannonballs clanged against the wooden hull of the ship, prompting you to jump slightly before springing into action to aid in their collection. You could not fight, but you could lift a multitude of items in your arms at once; very much accustomed to multitasking in mastering your craft.

The crew collectively hung their heads in shame at their own shortcomings: Zoro with unsuccessfully untying the sails, Luffy and Usopp at their inability to load cannons, you in your own inexperience at being a battle-ready tinkerer and Nami at her own idiocy at choosing to travel with this crew of misfits.

You heard strict orders barked from the marine vessel, requesting your swift surrender to which Luffy screamed out his defiance in response.

You all became gobsmacked at his swift inhale of air, ballooning himself and shooting back the incoming cannonball and destroying the top foremast and immobilising the Marine’s foremast sails in the process. Nami directed your vessel into the grey smog to flee from the sight, assuring the crew of the need to disappear from the sights of the crew.

Now, although you were an experienced seaworn traveller; you were yet in all your voyages to experience something as truly wonderful as the sights that lay before you. Although you had heard of its renowned cuisine as rumours of its travel were flooded from port to port, you breathed in an air of enthusiastic surprise as you took in the view of the floating restaurant: Baratie.

After successfully docking against the make-shift port, Luffy declared his intentions to disregard Nami’s suggestion of hiding the ship to halt the Marines from knowing your location and order everyone instead to go into the wide doors of Baratie with an enthusiastic: “let’s eat!”

You chuckled into your chest slightly as you trailed after your captain, your own enthusiasm brimming from your wide smile. You took in the illuminated lights of the restaurant before trailing your eyes on the patrons attending and noticing the wide variety of guests. Pirates, sailors, upper-class and some Marines had all held their displeasure for one another to engage in the service provided within the doors of the large vessel.

Completely taken with the fine craft etched into the foyer, you paused your entrance to the venue. You smiled through parted lips at the intricate silver pieces as Luffy and Usopp bartered with the host at their stand, prompting Nami to step forward with a bribe to be seated at a table. You brought your smile to meet with the playful expression Nami threw your way as you rose to follow her to the table.

You made your way to be seated, watching with a slight cringe as Luffy crawled along the crescent shaped plush booth seats surrounding your rotund table. You couldn’t help but to release a slight snicker at Zoro’s attempt to find a comfortable position for his swords to hang from his hips as he seated himself beside you.

You opened the matte-leather menu and began to sift through the variety of ingredients; taking in their descriptors with enthusiasm. It had been a while since you were graced with some variety in your cuisine, only recently enjoying the hospitality of Ms Kaya as an exception to pickled rations.

You rose the menu to showed your face, leaning in to the wide variation of a multitude of beverages on their drinks section. “Honey Badger Blitz, The King's Blues Tonic, Smirking Priest Gimlet, Lit Sailor’s Delight” to list a few of the hard-liquor forward cocktails before looking to the ales and wines on the page. You continued to read through it, ignoring the chatter surrounding you before the waiter made their way to your table and began their introduction.

“Hi, welcome to our shitty restaurant,” he said with an arrogant sarcasm laced in his voice, “where the only thing worse than the ambiance is the food. My name is Sanji, what can I get for you?”

Your eyes halted their reading in surprise and bringing the leather menu from your features to gaze through knitted brows at the waiter in front of you.

“One of everything, please,” Luffy said, stuffing his face with a cloud-soft dinner rolls.

“Any drinks?” Sanji continued with the same annoyed and abrasive tone, “one of our signature cocktails to help you choke down your meal?”

You remained completely taken aback at his rude nature, gawking at his misrepresentation of all of the praise you heard Baratie was renown for as Nami scoffed: “giving us the hard sell, huh?”

You witnessed Sanji’s complete demeanour change at the voice of your orange-haired associate as he quirked his head to the side and offering a smirk.

“Apologies madam, I didn’t see you there. Would you care for an apéritif to start?” he flirted, “we have several rare Micqueot reserved vintages in stock.”

You turned your eyes to meet with Zoro’s as you felt a slight giddiness at the attention he was paying your crewman. Zoro clicked his tongue a little and quirking his head to the side.

“Or perhaps you would like a glass of Umeshu?” he paused before adding, “you know, something sweet for someone sweet,” with a subtle wink.

Nami slightly rose her upper lip in subtle disgust; “is something wrong with your eye?”

“Just blinded by your beauty,” he continued with that same smirk adorning his features and shaking his head subtly. You almost applauded his skilled flirtatious craft, being one of your own negotiation specialties. You almost in that moment felt like you slightly missed your calling, enjoying the playfulness he had brought in the direction of your friend.

Zoro coughed, bringing Sanji’s attention toward himself.

“Waiter, can I get a bear and,” he began in a bored tone while he cocked his neck to direct the waiters attention to the rest of the crew, “something for my friends?”

“-two beers, I normally have three, but-” Usopp added, as to one-up Zoro in his macho exterior.

“And a milk,” Luffy said raising his hand, gesturing upwards as a schoolboy would in a daunting classroom.

“Three beers, and a milk. And uh, for Madam?” he again smirked at Nami.

“Water,” she said with a disinterested blink.

“Still, sparkling, mineral? With ice or without, cubed or crushed?” he questioned her, not threatened by her indifference.

“Regular water in a regular glass,” she said slowly, narrowing her eyes ever so slightly, “please.”

“Right away,” he said in a sultry tone. You decided in that moment to produce your order to the waiter.

“I’ll take that Umeshu,” you said with a sideward smile, placing the menu on the table in front of you and leaning ever so slightly against the table. You knew from experience that receiving no reaction from a potential guest in your establishment was almost a fate worse than death. Your eyes challenged him, almost taunting with an unspoken: “I’m happy to play along.”

His eyes widened and his one slightly more visible eyebrow cocked upward with a small smirk.

“Three cubes of ice, and one of the slightly fermented plums, please,” you said, turning your attention back to the menu, smoothing your hands over the pages with a slight bounce of your shoulders. As you did not choose to engage in that stiff drink earlier due to the anxiety of the task you were undertaking, but you felt you could surely use that drink now.

Sanji smiled at you and nodded his head at your order before looking again to Nami and producing that before seen flirtatious smirk. He made his way back to the kitchen, prompting Zoro to commence with the endless teasing towards Nami. Usopp let out a drawn out, “ah” and smiled upwards at the orange-haired navigator. She rolled her eyes.

“What?” she said in an annoyed tone.

“Nothing,” Zoro shrugged, before adding, “madam.”

This prompted you to giggle at the comment. Both Usopp and Zoro continued their taunts and teases at Nami as she rolled her eyes and choked back a small scoff. You scrunched up your nose, noticing Luffy had too enjoyed in the laughter, but seemed to more confused at the scenario and laughing in nervousness rather than engaging in the taunts.

“You guys are the worst,” she smirked around the table.

After eating the most delectable variety of food and felt your stomach almost uncomfortably expand at the pure density of the items presented before you, you slouched back into the seat and raised the slightly sweet, slightly sour plum wine to your lips and savoured the last remnants over your tongue before swallowing. You hummed at the candy-like flavour as the sides of your cheeks puckered slightly. You closed your eyes in pure bliss before reaching for the pickled plum in your glass and promptly placing it into your mouth.

You expertly peeled the flesh of the small fruit away from the pit with your tongue and moved the soft fruit to one side of your mouth to remove the pit from between your teeth. You placed the pit within your empty glass and began to chew at the fruit, enjoying the tang it produced before swallowing.

Luffy raised his glass to toast to your victory against the Marines, which caused you to nearly choke on the fruit.

Nami began to argue with Luffy about the truthfulness of his toast, indicating our sheer luck in that situation. After reiterating her point, she then began to berate him for the lack of relay of his family of origin. Zoro and Nami began to bicker slightly, only halting at the return of the waiter, Sanji, as he placed the bill down on the table.

Luffy smiled in a thin line with a small curt nod before taking the itemised bill into his hands and signing his name.

“Thank you, my good man,” Luffy said with a smile as Sanji picked up the bill in a silver platter and turned it to face himself.

He looked at the menu, eyes widening in sheer glee at what Luffy had written before adding, “No, sir. Thank you.”

He had a small, unnerving laugh escape from between his lips before journeying back to you assume cash the receipt.

“Zoro, would you mind if I could just-?” you began as you gestured to remove yourself from the booth. In order to successfully exit, you would either require the swordsman to stand up from his reclining position, or unceremoniously climb over his lap to exit the booth. As a lady, you would prefer the former of the two options, waving your hands in a slight ‘shooing’ gesture as you wordlessly expressed your intentions.

With a small smirk, he rest his back against the seat behind him and gestured for you to ungracefully maneuver your way over him to escape from the table. He brought the brown beer bottle to his lips and had a challenging expression adorning his eyes as he did so. You breathed out at his stubbornness with a slight growl but didn’t shy away from his challenge. You hoisted up your skirts to reveal dark short pants beneath as you swung your legs over his in an unladylike manner.

“Where are you going?” Luffy asked you as he continued to gnaw at the fleshless tomahawk bone before placing another bread roll into his mouth.

“I need to walk all of that off. Stretch my legs a bit, you know,” you said with slight agitation at how difficult Zoro was truly making this for you. You planted your legs on the ground and kicked the swords attached to Zoro’s hips slightly as you did so.

“Did you want company?” Nami asked you, leaning up a little.

“I’m happy retiring alone,” you shrugged, “although I might try to find the bar a little later.”

Nami gave you a small smile as you bid them all a small temporary farewell before exiting the restaurant to set your sights into the open ocean. Baratie swayed ever so slightly against the stilled water alongside the docked ships attached to its makeshift port.

It was there where, for the first time in a small while, you felt completely alone. No uneasy feeling of being watched, no company with your crew, no beady eyes of a potentially deadly threat and absolutely no thoughts of the clown captain you locked lips with all those many days ago.

As soon as you had those thoughts pass over your mind, you immediately scolded yourself with a groan as you were brought back to those flooding emotions. This is why you intentionally did not want to be alone, you gently reminded yourself. You stretched your arms over the railing before hanging your head back to stare at the different constellations in the night sky.

“It was one kiss, woman,” you uttered to yourself, mentally hitting yourself at your thoughts, “get over it. Move on.”

You turned back around and began to walk along the deck of the promenade to rest your sights on the Baratie bar located in a very large, carved fish mouth. You noticed the bar was relatively quiet as many of the diners were in the middle of consuming their dinners; much as you were moments prior.

You approached the bar and moved to take a seat atop an empty stool, pulling it from beneath the varnished surface.

“Apologies, madam,” the bartender called to you while actively polishing glassware, “we’re at a limited menu currently as we prepare between services. All I can do, unfortunately, is offer ale, wine and rum neat.”

“That is absolutely fine by me, sir,” you smiled at the bartender, “I feel like rum might be on the agenda tonight.”

He returned your smile and placed a short and wide crystal glass in front of you and poured 90mls of the dark amber liquid in your glass. You nodded to him, extended a few berry and took the crystal between your hands.

As you nursed your drink at the bar, more patrons came flooding in after dinner service was concluded. You rose your glass to your lips and tasted the spiced, burning liquid to your lips before swallowing it, hissing slightly as it passed through your oesophagus to reach the pit of your full belly.

You turned to make visual contact with your crew, which you noticed was missing your young captain. You arched your brow as they approached the bar together, looking to Nami.

“Our Captain-?” you asked her.

“-Was a little short on change,” she concluded your sentence, “so he’s helping out in the kitchen to settle it.”

You nodded a little, creasing your brows before requesting another drink.

“I’ll take another rum, and something for my friends please,” you asked the bartended once retaking his attention.

“-Beer,” Zoro added monotonously.

“-Water,” Nami nodded curtly.

“-A Mermaid Tail Fizz Whizz,” Usopp called from beside you, prompting the three of you to turn to look at him with a hint of confusion at the request.

“What?” he asked, “I saw it on the menu, and as long as you’re buying, I’m trying!”

You laughed whole heartedly at his comment before turning towards the bartender to confirm your order with him.

“A beer, a water,” you started before adding, “and two Mermaid Tail Fizz Whizz’s please.”

“Right away, ma’am,” he said with a smile, accepting your berry and turning on his merry way to retrieve your drinks. You turned to your friends and clapped a hand on Usopp’s shoulder with a smile.

“Shall we go and find a seat before the tables are full?” you asked them, gesturing to a white glass illuminated table at the rightmost corner of the crescent-shaped lip of the open mouth of the fish head. Zoro nodded once to you and gestured for you to lead the way.

“Oh, such a gentleman,” you mocked playfully as you hopped down from your place atop the stool and proceeded to take a seat, “where was this energy earlier?”

He scoffed at you, but chose to remain silent as you took your seat. You then invited Nami to sit next to you and Usopp, while Zoro placed himself on a solo stool in front of you.

A member of the wait staff came and brought over your drinks, placing them on the lit table in front of you. You smiled at them as they returned to the bar.

You reached for both your and Usopp’s large drinking vessels, noticing the sheer volume of liquid you were about to consume. Your eyes widened slightly as you brought one of the wide bowls to Usopp, who’s eyes were equally as convex as your own.

“I think I may have made a mistake,” you uttered quietly, looking into the bowl of turquoise liquid. You looked to Usopp, making eye contact first before bringing your lips to the three straws. You placed all of them in your mouth and sipped lightly.

It tasted so incredibly sweet, like the boiled candies of your youth with finely beaded bubbles. As soon as you released the straws from between your lips after taking the first sip, you placed the bowl on the table before you with your brows knit together in thought.

“Pace yourself,” Zoro warned Usopp as he hastily drank the sweet, nectar-like drink.

“I don’t even think there’s liquor in here,” he said, gesturing down while laughing, “it tastes just like candy.”

“Last time I said that, I woke up face down under a table,” Zoro offered off-handedly.

“I have definitely made a mistake,” you uttered, leaving the bowl in front of you, “that’s dangerous, that is.”

“You seriously don’t think what Luffy did was messed up?” Nami said, breaking your conversation away from your drinks.

“Yeah, he should’ve told us,” Zoro said, “but in case you haven’t noticed, we’ve been making enemies everywhere we go.”

“Psycho clowns,” Zoro said, looking directly at you as he said it, prompting you to bring your eyes down to the contents in your bowl, “killer butlers. What’s a Vice-Admiral gonna do to us?”

“No, you don’t get it. I can’t get caught, not while I’m so close-,” Nami began, halting her words as to withhold her emotions slightly, before looking back into her waterglass. She regained her composure before suggesting, “uh, who’s ready for another drink. My treat this time.”

Zoro hummed, “my favourite kind of drink.”

“I think I’m done,” you said, also rising to your feet.

“With your drink or for the night?” Nami asked you, halting slightly.

“Both I think,” you said with a small shrug.

“You’re returning to the ship?” Usopp asked you, almost upset.

“I am,” you said, “need to sleep off that amount of food and finally repair that little mechanical watch for you, Nami. Now that I’ve got a bit of time, I figured I’d give it one final go before I throw the bloody thing into the ocean.”

Nami allowed a small chuckle to depart from her lips at your comment.

“At that, I’m off. I’ll see you in the morning,” you said before turning to Zoro, “and please, don’t do anything stupid. No engaging in combat while I’m sleeping.”

“No promises,” Zoro uttered before bringing his glass to his lips and taking a large gulp.

“Tell Luffy goodnight for me,” you said as you turned on your way with a slight wave to your crew.

You shook your head at his comment before retiring to your quarters on the ship, turning to take one more look at the true majesty of the floating restaurant. You felt the air shift slightly as the wind blew against The Going Merry’s retracted sails. You furrowed your brows at this before continuing on your way to welcome another blissful evening of working with your tools, sleeping soundly through the night and not dwelling any more on the thoughts on your clown Zoro mentioned earlier.

You halted your thoughts, pausing as you fully took them in.

“Fuck,” you uttered to yourself aloud in a slight groan, longing for the fates to bring you together once more.  

Tag List:

@thesadvampire @a-phan-of-youtube @multifandombtch @plan3t-plut0 @tiredemomama @tfamidoingwithmylife @bimboshaggy @plan3t-plut0 @vixnicknacks

(I swear, prepare yourselves to be fully fed and watered later today 🫡).

Part 8

[brynnmclean]

in the core of everything drums a beat - snippets round up post

Actually, not a bad idea to have some kind of post with all the Hellblade fic fragments I've posted so far. In vague order of how they should fit together chronologically in the fic:

Chapter one

Rough draft of chapter one where Thórgestr is having a lot of fever dreams (there was an earlier post with a small section that I think is still my favorite in the chapter)

Also from chapter one, but I think @eisoj5 asking me for "and" as a word in that WIP meme remains hilarious, so here's that post

Chapter two

Part of chapter two and the introduction of my Irish healer OC Iseult

Thórgestr awake and making a very bad joke about getting stabbed, my beloved

First Senua Giantsbane name drop!

"Is my father dead?" "He's alive. He's an exile."

I'm really fond of Fargrímr and I do think he cares about Thórgestr, so this is a nice little moment for that

Chapter three

Intro to the chapter where half-asleep Thórgestr eavesdrops on a conversation between Senua and Fargrímr

There is so much in the game about Thórgestr's dad so why not feature a dream of his mother, here's her introduction

I gave her some very specific spirit vibes :)

You know, lot of emphasis on being your father's child, but Thórgestr is also his mother's son and I think that's important. Also I know surnames are patronymic, but there was that whole thing in the game about the importance of names, chosen names included, and so I really dig the idea of Thórgestr privately thinking of himself as Eindridson. (Also I like prophecies and love the idea of Eindrid as ghostly fate-spirit predicting how Áleifr will die... Honestly, chapter three is a fave!)

Thórgestr probably forgot what his mother's face looked like, so of course he's afraid to look away from her when she appears in his dreams

You ever write a bunch of fun images and then have a friend brainstorm plot developments with you later when you're at a loss on what kind of object you might need characters to go find, so of course your friend is like, "hey, you already wrote what you need." Just me? (thanks @allatariel <3)

Chapter four

The beginning of the chapter

Part of a midnight conversation between Senua and Thórgestr, early in the chapter

A moment I think is cute at the end of that scene

The beginning of an important conversation between Ástríðr and Thórgestr.

"Your father is gone. So is mine. But I’ll have what I’m owed. Tell me, Thórgestr," Ástríðr says, "what is your regret worth? What of your word?"

please I want the beginning of this next scene to be down, I've been struggling

working on another conversation between Senua and Thórgestr, but also this is a post where I ramble about some things I want to accomplish in this fic!

Senua first talks about Dillion

Senua finally gets a hug LIKE SHE DESERVES

Chapter five

Another spooky dream :) this one heavily referencing the beginning of the game in Reykjanestá

Chapter six because I have lost control of my outline again!!!

Sections from multiple chapters, but I'm putting this here: intro descriptions of OCs!

A funny part of a conversation with another OC, this one a Bjarg skáld who pitches a marriage of convenience between Senua and Thórgestr to his utter bewilderment

Chapter... uh, current outline says eight... JUST KIDDING it's Chapter ten now

One of my favorite parts I've written for the whole damn thing even now -- Thórgestr doing sword drills alone on a beach near Bárðarvik

Thórgestr and Fargrímr conversation snippets one and two that are actually part of a larger scene

Other posts:

My fanmix / fic playlist post

Others Narration transcription posts (6 total)

My video games screenshots tag

The overall tag for this fic is hertan writing tag

... also for my own reference, first mention of the fic, dated 04 June 2024 (sighs so heavily about how slow of a writer I am)

Feel free to author subscribe on AO3 if you want to catch the fic drop whenever that happens in the future

[hyperfixationsporfavor]

True Form Sukuna/Reader: A Moment in Time (Part 4- Fateful Warnings)

Author’s Note: Hello people! I’m back with a new chapter of this fic. It’s super short but I wanted to ease back into writing since it’s been awhile. I just started a new job so I apologize for the lack of updates. Hopefully I’ll be able to drop the next chapter sooner. Enjoy!

Warnings: mentions of blood, implied sex, referenced infidelity, sexism, Sukuna

“Recite it again,” Tengen instructed. 

A young Ryomen Sukuna let out a sigh, holding the parchment in his hand closer to his face to make out the text in the dim candle light. 

“When ending the life of a hostile sorcerer one must be wary that they will not come back as a curse, you must kill them with the usage of cursed energy.”

Tengen stood up from her spot behind the table to stare down at the unruly nineteen year old. 

“Correct, so why did you fail to do so earlier?”

Sukuna tossed the parchment on the stack of other scrolls and leaned back with a shrug. 

The instance she was speaking of had happened earlier that day. A curse user had been causing trouble in a small village up north, leading to the deaths of a few families. This is why they had personally reached out to Tengen in a plea of mercy, for the landowning lords could care less about the lives of a few peasants. 

She had decided to send Sukuna in her place, noticing how restless he was becoming these days, only for her protege to carelessly allow him to bleed out. 

“I had every intention of going back to finish the job,” he huffed.

She glared at him. “Yes you did, as soon as you got back from desecrating his wife.”

He brushed off the claims of infidelity with a wave of his hand. 

“She invited me inside while the ugly bastard was out, believe me the little whore was singing my praises joyously.”

Tengen blew past his odious sentiments with contempt. 

“Yes, only for her to meet her end when he returned as a vengeful curse to slice her throat.”

Sukuna rolled his eyes. 

“I was there.”

“Which is precisely why I’m failing to see how you don’t grasp the severity of the situation!” she snapped.

“What situation?” he argued back. “I used cursed energy to exercise him. It’s over.”

“After a completely preventable loss of life.”

Sukuna crossed his arms. “Are you talking about the wife? She was warming the bed of a man you wanted me to kill. Who cares if she lived or died?”

“It’s not just that Ryomen, it’s the way you’ve been handling everything as of late. Aggressively doing the tasks I give you with little regard for the wellbeing of others, blatantly ignoring my teachings, disrespecting my writings. How am I to trust you as my successor?”

Yes, the original reason she had taken the then young boy into her home. Being a woman, even as powerful as she, could only get Tengen so far. So she had begun relying on the presence of a male figure to act as a stand in for her. 

Played the part of Tengen while she operated from behind the curtain. Currently she had been using a fellow she had met decades ago by the name of Kenjaku, a person she had come to trust, but he was aging rapidly, feeling the affects of old age settling throughout his body. 

So a replacement was necessary, and that’s where Ryomen Sukuna came in.

When she had first encountered him she had sensed a powerful presence, verging on becoming predatory. Despite Kenjaku’s protests she decided to take him on as a student, perhaps she could harness his cursed energy and make him useful. 

But now, standing in front of him, Tengen was beginning to realize that not even she could control Ryomen Sukuna, and she feared a time would come when no one could. 

Sukuna stood up, glaring at his instructor. 

“I am not some puppet like that old bastard you have to keep around! And I’m tired of you holding me back!”

“Ryomen, your reckless actions will lead to your eventual downfall.”

He narrowed his eyes on her. “Are you threatening me?”

“No, I’m warning you. If you stray I will no longer be able to help you.”

He let out a bitter laugh and stormed out of the room, out of the house, out of Tengen’s life.

“I’ll never require your help.”

~

From then on Sukuna strived to grow stronger, and he did, evolving beyond a human body with an appetite that could only be appeased by the taste of human flesh. He lived how he wanted, ate when he wanted, and entertained only those who he found interesting. And at this current moment the one he found the most interesting, was you. 

~

“Damn him! Damn him!” the lord of the house howled.

His personal physician worked quickly to stop the bleeding while he screamed in agony. The other residents and staff stood around him anxiously, waiting to see if he’d live through the hour. 

The young servant boy was the only person whose mind was still on you and the terrified expression you wore as Sukuna had whisked you away. He trembled as he reluctantly approached one of the palace ladies who hovered next to the physician, the same one who had scolded you. 

“My Lady,” he managed to force out. “What is to be done about (Name)?”

She peeled her attention away from the grotesque scene to face him. “Who?”

He blinked in disbelief. “The maid…scheduled for execution.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “What do you think you imbecile? Nothing. Her fate is sealed.”

The palace lady turned her attention to one of the noblewomen next to her. 

“Better a low status maid than one of us.”

“You!” the physician called. 

The servant boy looked up to find it was him who he was speaking to. 

“More rags. Go now.”

~

The End. 

[yuujism]

Tainted Promises (geto suguru x reader)

Part 1: Tainted

| PAIRINGS: gojo satoru x gn!reader x getou suguru

| WARNINGS: suggestive, explicit language, smut soon (next chapter will have tags) woo plot, established relationship, cheating, toxic, revenge, angst, kinda modified so it can fit the story (implied to be set after riko's death and geto's spiralling but uhh...), reader's sex and physical appearance is never mentioned, grammar errors

| WORD COUNT: 2.1k

| A/N: i'm back but im not really back lol this is the first part of a small series I started writing like 2 years ago and found in my notes app so... why not publish it and let people read it even if i am not currently writing? anyway idk if people remember me but thank u for supporting my works even after all this time and liking them :) see you in 2 more years LOL (jk ... unless...)

They were the strongest.

Those words resonated as an echo in Suguru’s mind since that day, the meaning behind those words still a total mystery. Perhaps it was meant as a responsibility. An inevitable fate. 

An implicit promise. 

He didn’t think much of it before Satoru’s serious words struck him like a lightning inside the eye of the storm, coming back to Suguru in form of dreams. Nightmares. Images of welcoming bloody hands spread towards him, an invitation, perhaps even a threat, to join a lawless world dictated by the untouchable. The strongest.

No. That wasn’t Suguru’s ideal.

Who cared about being the strongest among all? Rules were necessary. Listen to the higher-ups, complete missions, save and protect humans, swallow curses, taint yourself. Swallow, taint, conserve the peace. That was the job of a jujutsu sorcerer. That was the job of Geto Suguru.

Responsible, dutiful, diplomatic and strong.

So why was Satoru—his teammate, his accomplice, his best friend—different from him? A rule breaker, a rebellious soul with god complex issues, an idiot, incapable of seriousness and apathetic.

Why, even with all those flaws to Suguru’s eyes, could Satoru get someone like you in his life?

You, just like Suguru, followed the rules. A professional sorcerer that cared for the weak, getting out of their way to protect the smallest and even the biggest. Top of the class after him, Yaga’s right hand, the favourite of the higher-ups, probably even more trustable than Suguru himself. However, now with your brand new relationship with Satoru? Not that much. He knew that way too well.

Tainted. Making a promise with Satoru would get anyone tainted. 

The probelms seemed to have started one month after the beginning of your story together. A few weeks later, they were too obvious for Suguru -or anyone- to ignore. Hints of sleepless nights appeared on your features and the memories of an unknown scent that followed Satoru’s clothes kept haunting you along with the jealousy and hurt in your body. Missed calls, ditched dates and  a small bruise on your lover’s neck. It quickly became toxic. Almost unbearable. Suguru knew it. You knew it. 

And you both played dumb.

Responsible. You had to be responsible for your actions. You made a promise after all, and, ever the diplomatic sorcerer, you were intending to keep it. Swallowing the pain and hatred, the sadness and sorrow, the embarrassment and anger, you decided to keep living with the lie that was Gojo Satoru as proudly as your shattered dignity allowed you. You were better than him but for how long? 

Rules were necessary. You followed the rules as a religion. But what good did that ever bring you? 

Suguru could already sense it, perhaps even before you noticed. The corruption that anger and impotence could bring you. It was unstoppable once it started spreading, taking over your thoughts and ideals to then consume your actions. Satoru was the strongest in almost every sense that he became a poisonous time bomb for the ones surrounding him. It just happened to explode in your face to suffer the majority of the consequences. 

But were you the only one living them? You certainly weren’t the only one ignoring the menace that Satoru was. And definitely not the only one involved closely with said sorcerer. 

Suguru vividly remembers the shared laughs between him and his best friend after the story of how Satoru cheated on you. Repeatedly. A good fuck, he described you, his favourite toy so far. But Suguru knew him too well, right? He understood him better than anyone to even expect him to get in a serious relationship, right? That’s why they were best friends, the strongest, the rulers of the new to come sorcery world. Right? 

Right. Satoru was right. Even if Suguru’s brain didn’t stop replaying images of you with clenched teeth and hands closed in a tight fist, angry eyes staring at Satoru’s figure from afar to quickly change into your usual loving and submissive demeanour when he turned to look at you, he agreed. Even if Suguru felt himself become worse than he ever was when you gave him the sweetest of smiles even after laughing at you with Satoru for the nth time behind your back, he agreed. 

Because Satoru was hard-to-swallow for Suguru, yet he kept indulging himself into the bittersweet taste that was that friendship over and over again. 

Rules, responsibilities, strength, empathy. None of that mattered when Satoru was in the picture. The only thing that mattered was a promise. At the end of the day, they were best friends for a reason and you were with him for a reason.

That didn’t change the fact Suguru could treat you so much better. Be so much better. His heart dropped at the thought. Was he in the position to even think that after being accomplice of Satoru’s actions? After playing along and laughing at you? At this point, he was as guilty as your current cheat of a lover. But he could still have a chance, could he not? He was strong, responsible and professional. Would he be any better than Satoru? He thought he would. He hoped he would. 

Suguru’s mind started flooding with questions once again, self-doubt dripping from every single one of them until his thoughts were flooded with insecurities and rage. Rage? Strange yet oddly familiar. The warmth travelling over his body felt nice for once. No longer suppressed and set free to quickly come down from that high to feel guilty once again. Why would he feel rage towards Satoru? He was his best friend.

Was he?

Oh, how Suguru missed that little voice inside his head. A voice that he silenced long ago. The one that told him to commit the unbelievable, that went against all his morals and ideals, the one that ordered him to swallow and swallow, not for the greater good but for him to become stronger. Because he could. Because he wanted to. The voice that was as tainted as his thoughts were right now.

And now, as his chest tightened with anger and his body ached with hunger of power, Suguru never felt more as himself as he did now. Strong and capable, the maker of his own rules and own world. A perfect world. He was right back then when he thought of the weak as simple as that: weak. And he was right to feel what he avoided to feel all that time.

Power.

Suguru had the power to ignore the responsibility that came along with it. He had the power to follow his own path with his own decisions without having to live behind someone else’s shadow. To get what he wanted whenever he wanted. 

Responsible, dutiful, diplomatic and strong. 

That was Geto Suguru. And right now, he wanted you.

And nobody noticed. Not Satoru, his proclaimed best friend, who kept playing around lost in the pleasure of both you and the freedom of being the strongest. Not the higher-ups who kept relying on him to keep an eye on the threat that was Satoru. Not his acquaintances that followed him mindlessly into a slowly growing empire. His empire.

Nobody noticed the power growth in Suguru. Nobody except you. 

Strong. Suguru was strong in your eyes. With sly movements, smug smile and a powerful stance. Completely overshadowed by the confidence of your current lover until the day he looked at you from above. Both figuratively and literally. His eyes held a promise, a completely different kind from Satoru’s that you understood way too well it scared you. 

Carnal, passionate and angry. That was his promise. A shiver ran down your spine at the mere sight of Suguru, responsible and respectful Suguru, smirking at you. Dark and dangerous. A different Suguru. Because you both shared the same ideal. Rules were necessary. And this time he was the one who made the rules. 

You weren’t interested. At least you tried to convince yourself you weren’t. Rules weren’t meant to be broken nor renewed, not by Suguru, not by you, not by anyone. So why did you feel excited at the thought of going against your own morals? To break, destroy and betray everything and everyone along with your lover’s best friend? It shouldn’t surprise you, in fact, you were not surprised. 

Your promise to Satoru started losing importance when you considered meeting with Suguru. You lied to yourself by thinking it would be to have a small talk, to ask for an explanation behind the meaning of that moment between the two of you and kindly reject whatever he wanted to propose. It sure didn’t matter anymore when you were under his dark gaze at the step of his door, mouth open in a silent gasp at the power Suguru, overshadowed Suguru, radiated, never losing his gentle and highly demanour as he let you in with a soft smile on his face and the smooth sound of your name leaving his mouth. 

A treacherous silence filled the room as time seemed to freeze between the two of you, staring at each other seconds after closing the door. 

You wanted to yell at him for even thinking he could get away with whatever he had in mind. For deeming you so low to think you would break the promise to Satoru and betray him when you were better than that. But were you when excitement was making your legs shake when Suguru’s eyes landed on your lips for a small second? Were you better when you couldn’t stop thinking in the way his large hands would feel on your body?

The answer was crystal clear: you weren’t. You never were. 

And realisation hit you. It hit you harder than Satoru’s cheating. And it sure hit you harder than the surprise you felt when you threw yourself at Suguru’s arms, lips crashing in a desperate kiss.  

Because all those times, Suguru could see through you and he was a great pretender too. He saw your hatred and your thirst for revenge, the constant fight within you to stop yourself from breaking the rules. To disobey the higher-ups. To betray Yaga. To hurt Satoru. They all deserved it. How pretentious of you to even think you were any better than any of them.

You and Suguru were the same. Responsible, dutiful, diplomatic and strong. Suguru just happened to be stronger.

As Suguru’s large hands roamed over your waist to push you closer to his own body as his tongue entered the warmth of your own mouth, you realised something else. You didn’t want Suguru and neither did he want you. What you both wanted was the power taht was long taken away from you. 

Power over a certain sorcerer.

It seemed Suguru noticed your change in demanour as your tangled your hand in his long silky hair and slightly pulled, the aggressiveness of your tongue along with his making him let out a groan that you swallowed with a whimper before he pulled away, a sly smirk on his face.

“You sure didn’t need any explanation, did you?” Suguru muttered as one of his hands traveled to your cheek, his thumb caressing your now wet lips as he eyed you. Such a gentle move yet so dominant. Expected from someone like Suguru. “Finally grew tired of Satoru cheating on you?”

That was unexpected.

Rage filled your body once again as you slapped his hand away from your face, glaring at him just the same way you’ve glared at Satoru when he wasn’t looking. Suguru chuckled as he grabbed your face once again, this time a little rougher as he turned you to face him again, other hand sneaking under your shirt to feel the soft skin under it. You held back a moan.

“Oh, come on. It was a small joke.” He playfully stated, long fingers drawing circles on the side of your waist as you grew impatient and angry. At what? You weren’t sure.

“An unfunny one at that.” You finally spoke and Suguru raised an eyebrow at the unknown and new stern tone your voice held. The sweet, professional and kind goody two shoes forsaken under his influence. “I didn’t come here for a stand-up show.” 

Your hands made their move again, landing on the collar of his shirt as you got closer again, anticipation giving you the confidence you lost before.

“I can see that.”

And just like that, your mouths crashes again, this time angrier, hungrier. Suguru’s comment about Satoru cheating on you lit an agressive fire within you that you tried to extinguish. But here, between Suguru’s arms and the feeling of his mouth now travelling down your neck, you finally felt free.

Next chapter (spicy) preview: "Your boyfriend likes sloppy seconds, did you know that? Should I just cum inside you and send you off to him dripping with my seed? Hm?"

[gilthairpins]

Book 2 Chapter 6: Who Will Forget First?

The last day of the 51st year of Emperor Kangxi’s reign was spent peacefully as everyone planned for the future. Late at night, I tossed and turned for a long time, but I couldn’t fall asleep. My mind was full of the scene of my sister and I facing each other in silence at the New Year Eve dinner.

Her eyes were blurred with tears and I felt guilty. She seemed to have a lot to say, but she could only sit there and wait for me to greet her before leaving. Eighth and Eighth Fujin, who were sitting next to her, talked and laughed as they passed by us, and then turned their eyes away.

The whole room was full of people talking and laughing, celebrating the new year, but my sister and I were looking at each other from a distance, both feeling sad.

I want to write my sister a letter. I tried to write several times but I couldn’t find the words. I told her not to worry about me, but how could she not worry about me in the current situation? I said I was fine, but I knew I couldn’t lie to my sister. After thinking it over, I was speechless. I am now completely confused about my future. I just live one day at a time and wait for fate to come.

Winter turns to spring, and spring turns to summer solstice. I am already 22. According to custom the next year will be the age to be released from the palace. I often think about when Kangxi will grant me the marriage.

Sometimes I feel so tired that I would like to know the matter sooner rather than later. But sometimes I pray that Kangxi will forget all about it and let me stay in the palace. Stay for a lifetime. Recalling that I still had the idea of leaving the Forbidden City and traveling around the world. I couldn’t help but smile bitterly. How could I have thought about it so wishfully? Now, being able to stay safely in the Forbidden City has become a longing. There are many momos in the palace who still serve them until old age, but I know in my heart that I will definitely not be one of them.

Kangxi went north to escape the summer heat. He was accompanied by Third, Eighth, Ninth, Fourteenth, Fifteenth, etc.

When I wasn’t on duty I would lead my horse and wander around the grassland. I was filled with suppressed sadness. This grassland carried too many memories for me. Fourth had kissed me forcefully, taught me to ride, and talked with me under the moon. Eighth and I traveled together galloping side by side, laughing loudly and crying painfully. Thirteenth confronted Minmin to save me, and the two of them laughed in the tent. Thinking of this I suddenly jumped on my horse, the whip made an empty sound and I flew out like an arrow.

Faster, faster, faster! I kept spurring my horse. The wind whistled in my ears. I was galloping on my horse when I heard the sounds of hooves behind me. Soon, another horse was galloping side by side with me.

“Are you crazy?! Riding so fast for no reason! Slow down!” Fourteenth shouted.

I ignored him and continued at full speed. He had no choice but to follow me. The horse gradually became tired and slowed down. My depression eased a little and I let the horse go at its leisure. I turned my head to Fourteenth and asked smiling, “How do you have the time to do this?”

He smiled and dismounted. I had to follow him.

“Would you like to sit a while?” He asked. I nodded and we sat on a patch of grass. I found some foxtail grass and started to weave something.

“Remember something unhappy?” He asked.

I nodded casually.

“Was it something Doctor Li said?”

I nodded.

“Some things have long passed and he said to let them go; some things are beyond your control and you have already done everything you can. And something are beyond your control, so why bother yourself?” He said.

I nodded.

He flicked me. “Just nodding. Are you listening to me when I speak?”

I smiled back and said, “Isn’t it just forgetting? I’ve got it!” I then handed him the thing I was weaving. “I’ll give you a little fox.”

He took it and played with the fox’s furry tail. “Why did you give me this?”

Why? There is a reason for doing anything. I just made it up and gave it away.

I laughed and said, “Because you are like it. Very smart and calculating, just for the farmer’s chickens.”

His face changed slightly. He stared at me and smiled again. “I’m not worried about it.”

I looked at him and laughed. “Ha! You admit you are a fox.” I got up and patted my body. “I want to go back.”

He sat still and said, “Go, but ride slowly.”

I smiled without saying anything and was about to mount the horse when he spoke up. “Someone will accompany you in a few days.”

I turned my head and looked at him.

“Zuoying and Minmin are coming.”

I held the reins in my hands and lowered my head in thought. I then lightly mounted my horse and rode off.

A few days later, Prince Zuoying and his wife Minmin, came to see Emperor Kangxi. I was just thinking about when to go and see Minmin, but Prince Zuoying had already sent his servant to call me. I walked into Prince Zuoying’s tent and before I could say anything, the servant standing beside me had already opened the curtain and said, “The prince is waiting for you, young lady.”

I nodded and smiled at him and entered the tent. Zuoying sat in front of a table and Minmin wearing bright red Mongolian robes stood beside him, leaning over to talk to him. Her beauty added a bit of feminine charm. I was about to greet her when she ran over and hugged me shouting, “My dear sister! I missed you so much!”

“I thought you were more stable after getting married! Why are you still so impetuous?” I pushed her and smiled.

Zuoying frowned and looked at Minmin, “If you keep running around like this I’ll have to find a few more maids to look after you.”

Minmin tilted her head towards him and giggled, wrinkling her nose. She then turned back to look at me carefully.

“I still have some things to do. You guys can talk slowly!” He said standing up. I saluted him “No thanks! No thanks! If I accept your gift in private, I will have trouble tonight!” Zuoying said quickly. He glanced at Minmin with a half smile and her face suddenly turned red. I smiled lowering my head pretending not to hear.

I stared at Zuoying’s departing back and said with a smile, “He treated you very well.”

Minmin suddenly stopped smiling and asked with a serious face, “Is Thirteenth okay? I heard he is in great misery.”

I didn’t want her to worry about this useless thing. Although Zuoying was generous, it wouldn’t be appropriate for Minmin to always worry about Thirteenth.

“Rumors are always exaggerated. He has someone taking care of him.” I said. She asked who.

I told her roughly about what had happened before Lu Wu and Thirteenth started dating. Minmin was silent for a long while and then said quietly, “How many people in the world can stand up to others even when they are in trouble and go through hardships together? She is worthy of Thirteenth. Thirteenth is blessed and so is she.”

I stared at her without saying a word.

“I’m just thinking of you as a friend. I have found my star and will cherish it. I will be happy.” She said looking up at me.

I smiled in relief and couldn’t help but hug her. People who cherish their blessings are truly smart people.

“Let’s not talk about me. What about you?” She asked.

My face darkened and I didn’t say anything for a long time.

“I think Eighth is now very nice to my sister. She is very gentle, but in her heart she is cold and distant. What happened to you? Why are you like this?” Minmin said.

I shook my head and said, “I don’t want to think about these things now. It’s so bitter. Let’s talk about something else!” I suddenly stood up. “I want to be happy on the grassland. Let’s go horse racing!”

Minmin pulled me and said, “I can’t race horses.” Her face turned red again.

“Why? Are you feeling unwell?” I wondered.

Minmin lowered her head smiling and I sat down. I suddenly realized what was happening and happily asked, “How many months? How come you can’t tell at all?”

“It’s only been a month, of course you can’t tell!” Minmin said.

I laughed and said, “I’ll be an aunt next year.”

She smiled happily and suddenly grabbed my hand. “Sister, why don’t we get married? Let my son marry your daughter in the future.” I smiled bitterly and said, “Don’t mention that I don’t know where my daughter is! Even if I knew I wouldn’t dare agree to you easily. Your son is the future prince!”

“Sis, when did you start talking about status? Oh, and let me tell you something. My father’s favorite concubine complained that my father did not leave the jade pendant to his own daughter, but gave it to a palace maid instead. My brother later asked my father about this. Guess what my father said? My father said, ��The person she marries will definitely be no worse than us in status, and may be even higher. It’s hard to say who will benefit from whom in the future.’” Minmin said.

I sat quietly without saying a word. A jade pendant was just a chess piece for the prince, diverting the prince’s covetousness towards Minmin; it was a way to show good will toward Kangxi and win me over; it was also a weather vane, but it was a huge rock in my life, stirring up many waves and causing me a lot of harm. But looking at Minmin’s innocent smile, I could only put aside all my complaints.

“Minmin, it doesn’t matter whether it’s status or not. In fact, the most important thing is that I hate this kind of thing where parents decide their children’s lives with just one word. You have experienced love yourself. You should know how painful it is to be forced to marry.” I said.

Minmin was stunned and said, “Sister, you are right! Sister is my only friend. I just thought that I can’t be with sister often. It would be even better for us to marry her daughter in the future. Besides, sister’s daughter must be one of the best. It is our blessing to marry her. But we forgot the children’s own thoughts.” Minmin frowned and thought a while. She continued, “Let them be. If they are not destined to be husband and wife in the future, it is also good to let them be brothers and sisters.”

I thought that everything was fate and there were many cases where parents were good friends but their children were not. But I didn’t want to ignore Minmin’s affection, so I smiled and said, “If I am lucky enough to have a daughter I will let her treat you the same way she treats me.”

“Okay!” Minmin said happily.

Days on the grassland always pass quickly and summer had passed before I knew it. Minmin and I were reluctant to part. Every time we parted I would wonder when we would see each other again. However, these last few months have made me completely reassured about Minmin and Zuoying. He really loves her. Maybe Zuoying does have the power and political considerations in his mind, but his feelings for Minmin are also sincere. I can only say that they are a match made in heaven, and Minmin does not have to face a man who is not as good as her.

When Zuoying makes a choice between the country and the beauty, there is no giving up or sacrificing between them because Minmin represents the country to Zuoying.

After Kangxi returned to Beijing, he lived in Changchun Garden. Not far away was Yuan Ming Yuan. Yuan Ming Yuan was a garden given to Fourth by Kangxi in the 46th of his reign. Kangxi would occasionally visit Yuan Ming Yuan.

Today, Kangxi was strolling in Changchun Garden. For some reason he suddenly got excited and told Li Dequan to go to Yuan Ming Yuan with a small group of people. Li Dequan saw that Kangxi was in a good mood and couldn’t dissuade him, so he had to agree. He sent someone to inform Fourth to prepare to receive him, and arrange for guards. Then Li Dequan and I served him in his carriage and left.

When we arrived at Yuan Ming Yuan, Fourth and his wives were already waiting at the gate. They were kneeling on the ground before the carriage had arrived. Kangxi got down from the carriage and said, “I just wanted to see the land you planted. I heard that you had planted a lot of fruit trees. Take me to see them.”

Fourth got up and accompanied Kangxi to walk slowly around the garden.

Because the old summer palace was very close to my school, I often went there for boating when I was in college. But I could only look at the ruins and imagine its former splendor. Now I had the opportunity to visit in person and my heart, which has long been indifferent to everything, couldn’t help but feel a little bit interested.

Unfortunately, I didn’t see many of the legendary famous scenes along the way, which made me feel a little surprised. Then I thought that those may have been build a little later so I wouldn’t have the pleasure of seeing it. For now, it looks like an ordinary garden, not worthy of the praise “Garden of gardens” and my initial excitement faded.

While Kangxi was looking at the fruit trees planted by Fourth himself, he was listening to him talk about the different methods of growing various fruit tree, as well as jokes that Fourth had made during the planting process. The father and son had a very pleasant conversation and for a moment people forgot that they were still monarch and subject.

Kangxi was in high spirits and walked a long way. Li Dequan and I looked at each other and frowned. It seemed that he was thinking about how not to spoil Kangxi’s mood, but to remind him to take a rest. Fourth was standing under a tree, answering Kangxi and he happened to be facing me. I made a gesture for him to sit down and take a rest. He seemed not to have seen it and continued to answer Kangxi, smiling. After they had finished, he said, “There are many chrysanthemums that you like planted around the front of the pavilion. Many of them are taken care of by me, father, please go and enjoy them.”

Kangxi smiled yes and the two of them walked towards the pavilion. Li Dequan smiled approvingly at me and we followed behind them. The servants of Fourth’s mansion saw his gesture and quickly left to prepare.

After Kangxi sat down in a rattan chair, Fourth stood to the side and pointed out to the chrysanthemums that he had been taking care of, explaining the origins and habits of each variety clearly. Kangxi nodded and listened. After a while, someone came to serve tea and snacks. I quickly took it and my tools that I had prepared in advance- poison testing. Li Dequan took them one by one. After some tests they were presented to Kangxi.

Kangxi was looking at the scenery around the pavilion, casually sipping tea and Fourth was chatting with him. The two talked about the chrysanthemums; Mr. Wu Liu, the Confucian spirit of involvement in the world, Laozi and Zhuangzi’s inaction, and finally returned to the hermit among flowers- chrysanthemums. Kangxi was in high spirits and commented on various poems about chrysanthemums. Li Dequan had not seen Kangxi so happy for a long time, so he stood by with a smile on his face. The pavilion was full of smiles.

Kangxi had drank a lot of tea but didn’t touch any of the snacks. After drinking tea and resting enough, the few of us got up and continued to stroll slowly. On the way, Li Dequan helped Kangxi to change his clothes and left. Fourth and I waited silently with other followers in the distance.

I looked into the distance without focus, strolling casually and passed Fourth. “His majesty didn’t eat any snacks just now and you would definitely be hungry after walking so much. Just looking at the crops and fruits that the son has planted with his own hands. It’s a bit lacking.”

He stood silent a moment and then turned to wave a servant over. After whispering instructions for a long time, the servant immediately ran away.

Once Kangxi returned, we walked around some more. Fourth saw that Kangxi was no longer interested so he invited him to rest a while before returning to the carriage. Kangxi smiled and nodded in agreement.

When he sat down, Fourth’s wife, Ulanara came in with tea and snacks. I took the tray from her with a smile on my face, but I had mixed feelings. I was testing for poison when she bowed to Kangxi.

“These pastries are definitely not as good as those in the palace, but they are made by me personally as a bit of filial piety. So I have to reluctantly ask the emperor to taste them.” Kangxi was very interested after hearing this. He took a cake from Li Dequan with a smile and tasted a piece. “Not bad. Very sweet.” He nodded.

As Fourth Fujin picked up the different cakes, she pointed out the different ones. “This chestnut cake was made from the chestnuts grown by the Prince. The chrysanthemum cake was made with the chrysanthemums that father emperor had admired outside in the pavilion…”

Kangxi was so happy that he tasted all of the cakes.

The gentle and dignified Fourth Fujin spoke in a sweet voice. I turned my head and looked out the window calmly. When Kangxi finished eating, a maid brought in a basin of water. I was about to roll up my sleeves when Fourth Fujin personally helped Kangxi to wash his hands.

Kangxi glanced at me and said, “How come you are usually the most eloquent person on weekdays, but you have become a saw-mouthed gourd today?”

I bowed and pretended to be wronged. “Now that the emperor has a smart and clever daughter in law to serve him, he despises the crudeness of a servant.”

Fourth Fujin’s eyes flashed with nervousness and anxiety. She smiled and said quickly, “I have often heard that Miss Ruoxi is kind and elegant, and has been with the emperor for many years. Her knowledge and bearing are incomparable to ordinary people. If the young lady uses a crude word wouldn’t it be unfair to her? Are you embarrassing us?”

“Ignore her! She is just pretending to make me smile. She is not a petty person.” Kangxi said.

He continued chatting with Fourth and his lady after washing his hands. He then turned his head and asked Li Dequan, “Do we still have the jade ruyi that Burma sent as tribute?”

Li Dequan replied, “There were four in total. Currently there is one left. One is in the hands of the Queen Mother, one was given to Concubine Mi, and one to Princess Minmin.”

“Send back and give it to Fourth Fujin, Lady Ulanara as a reward.” Kangxi said.

Fourth and his lady knelt down on hearing his words to express their gratitude. Kangxi smiled and said, “I haven’t been so relaxed for such a long time. No matter how precious the things are, they can’t compare with your filial piety. Who says there is no family happiness in the royal family? Today, I am just like an old man in an ordinary family! I eat the snacks that my son had planted and my daughter in law has made.”

Kangxi had sat there a long while before returning to Changchun Garden with a smile. Fourth and his lady knelt, seeing him off. I sat in the carriage and lifted the curtain to see him kneeling in front of everyone. The carriage was moving further and further away. Just as I was about to lower the curtain, he suddenly raised his head and stared at my carriage. His eyes were like a substance nailing my heart. My whole body was stiff and I stared at him fixated. His figure became more and more blurred until he disappeared without a trace, but his eyes still covered me everywhere.

I lowered the curtain and covered my face with my hands. Tears seeped out between my fingers and silently slide on to the blanket in the carriage. They disappeared in an instant without a trace, like they had never existed. Because Kangxi loved chrysanthemums, there were fresh chrysanthemums placed in the house for him to enjoy when they bloomed. Over the years I didn’t know how the job of picking, arraigning, and displaying the chrysanthemums fell to me. Every few days in autumn, I would go to the chrysanthemum garden.

Most of the rattan baskets were filled with chrysanthemums. I held scissors in my hands and looked at the largest and most brilliant yellow chrysanthemum, hesitating whether to pick it or not. Forget it! Let it release its beauty alone! Just as I was about to leave with the basket someone asked, “Why don’t you want that one?”

I was stunned for a moment and then dared to turn after taking a deep breath. I bowed to Fourth standing under a tree. He walked over to my side and we stood together in silence. I bowed and was about to leave when he asked “why?” while staring at the yellow chrysanthemum.

“I couldn’t bear it. Once I take it off, it will fall off quickly.” I said.

“Why don’t you hate me?” He asked.

So this is what he is asking. I smiled bitterly. What’s the point of saying it now? I walked away.

“Ruoxi!” He called out from behind.

I paused for a moment and continued to walk forward. I could feel his gaze on my back, a constant entanglement. I felt more and more sad, so I suddenly stopped and turned to look at him. His eyes were stubborn and helpless, with a hint of sadness.

I lowered my head and sighed. I walked back to him. “Why should I hate you? Because you broke your promise? How ridiculous! Are you going to be like Wei Sheng who kept his promise until death? Not to mention that this matter also affects Thirteenth’s future? Even if it was just you and me, I would not want to die together. I would rather live separately!”

He said in a deep voice, “Lu Wu begged on her knees in front of my house.”

“I know! Lu Wu and I were praying for Thirteenth to have a slightly better life now, while you are praying for him to be rescued one day in the future. We have different goals and different actions. For the sake of long term plans we can only sacrifice the present.” I said.

“Since Thirteenth has been imprisoned, I haven’t visited his wives or children.” He said.

I said, “If you can’t be patient, you will ruin your big plans.

If we made a mistake now, we may never see each other again. We can only be patient and wait for the consequences. Only then will we be able to enjoy the happiness of family in the future.

We fell into silence. I stared at the prince next to me, his arms were stiff and fists clenched.

“It is precisely because you were close to Thirteenth in the past and that he had committed a crime under your name that you should avoid suspicion even more. What’s more, Thirteenth had admitted to doing this behind your back, which makes you appear unfaithful and unjust. Anyone would be chilled to the bone. How could you turn around and take care of his wives and children and forgive him so readily? I’m afraid even the saints in ancient times couldn’t do it.” I said.

I turned to leave after saying this when he stopped me. “Wait a minute!” He then reached out and plucked the chrysanthemum I hadn’t had the heart to cut and put the flowers in my basket.

“I will forget everything soon!” He said coldly and turned walking away.

“Me too!” I said to his back. I turned and walked the other way.

After some distance, my steps slowed and I walked as one who lost their soul. I told myself again and again that I would definitely forget it!

The chrysanthemums began to wither and fall. I stood in the flower bed and was surprised to see the withered chrysanthemums before I realized it was already the end of autumn. Kangxi had summoned all the grandchildren to practice archery in the training ground. It was another scene of open and covert fighting.

I was on duty and didn’t want to join the fun. I wanted to pick a few more chrysanthemums, but there were no more flowers, so I turned back listlessly.

I was walking carelessly when I suddenly saw Tenth Fujin coming towards me. It’s too late to avoid her, so I quickly stepped to the side and bowed to her. Mingyu walked by and just as I was breathing a sigh of relief, she turned back and stood in front of me.

She stared at me for a long while before allowing me to get up. I straightens up. “Follow me.” I had no choice but to follow her, just a step behind. She walked a while a bit before stopping under a huge locust tree. The trunk was so big that it took four or five people to hug it. Mingyu put a hand on it and circled the tree. I followed. After a while, she suddenly laughed and leaned against the trunk. “I have only had a fight once in my life. How about you?” She asked me smiling.

Thinking back to those days I felt so happy. I smiled and replied, “I have played several times.”

She looked at me in surprise and I continued, “When we were In the northwest.”

“I’ve heard the people in the northwest are tough, but…” She said nodding. She looked me up and down. “Your sister is nothing like you.”

I smiled and said nothing.

“I hated you so much back then. But now that I think about it, it’s funny really. I can’t believe I actually rolled on the ground with you! That was my first time fighting, and besides, compared to an old hand like you, my performance wasn’t too bad.” She said.

“I was too impulsive back then.” I laughed.

“I was no better. I was the first to say something rude.” She shook her head.

“I should apologize to you.” I said.

“Okay! We are all for our own sisters. It’s hard to say who is right or wrong. We just have different stand points.” She said.

I couldn’t help but sigh when speaking of my sister. She sighed too. We looked at each other and smiled helplessly.

“It seemed my sister had the upper hand on the surface, but in fact, your sister was the one who had the upper hand. Your sister did nothing, but Eighth took care of everything for her. If your sister has something, Eighth will never leave your sister behind.” She said.

“What advantage does my sister have? Chanting in the Buddhist temples?” I asked.

She sighed softly and said, “My sister has been very smart since young. She speaks fluently and behaves as well as men, so she is very much loved by my grandfather. When my grandfather discusses state affairs, he often held her on his knee and let her listen in. And she didn’t disappoint him. When he questioned her in private she often said surprising things. Her name, Minghui, was especially changed by grandfather. It was derived from the Buddhist scriptures to mean “to distinguish right from wrong, to make choices; to have indestructible wisdom and to know the falsehood”. The princess Minghui of the Forbidden City back then was by no means just a false name.” She looked at me and continued, “Your sister’s horsemanship is indeed extraordinary, but you have not yet seen my sister. If you had, you would know the Dao. Compared to my sister, your sister is just a show off. More delicate and pretty rather than practical and generous!”

I raised my eyebrows in disapproval.

“Don’t disbelieve me! My sister’s horsemanship was personally trained by my grandfather. My grandfather followed Prince Suwu Haoge to attack Sichuan and killed Zhang Xianzhong; when he was the great general of Xuanwei, he punished Tushetu Khan and Chechen Khan of the Khalkha Tribe; when he was general of Dingyuan Pingkou, he repeatedly defeated Wu Sangui. Which great feat wasn’t achieved on horseback? Grandfather required my sister to meet the standards of a man, so how could someone he trained be weak? That was archery by horseback among thousands of troops! If my sister were a man, she would be definitely be famous on the battlefield!”

“If you put it that way, of course I’d believe it.” I exclaimed.

Her pride suddenly disappeared and she dejectedly said, “But what’s the use? Women should be delicate and good looking, but men don’t care about that at all.”

“My sister is not what you think. She has never tried to please Lord Bei’le, nor has she ever thought of competing with your sister.” I said.

“That’s what I hate the most. My sister has been with my grandfather since she was a child and she is loved by my uncles. How many princes and nobles wanted to marry her back then?” She sighed and leaned close to me, whispering, “My father didn’t want her marrying Eighth. Although he is a prince, we Manchu have always believed that ‘a son is honored by his mother’. His birth was already a step behind other princes’.”

I nodded in understanding. This is indeed the case with the Manchus. The son is honored by the mother first, and only after the son has made achievements can the mother be honored by the son.

She whispered, “Father has high hopes for you. With our family background, your intelligence and looks, you can only do…” She suddenly realized and stopped talking.

“I understand.” I smiled.

“It won’t be unfair to you. But compared to the backgrounds of the other princes, Eighth is really…” She shook her head. “Father doesn’t want to, but you like Eighth. Since we were little, you the only one among us brothers and sisters who dared to go against father. But father always did as she wanted.”

She was silent a while and then smiled a little. “I didn’t understand before, but now I know that women are the stupidest. Even if they know there is a fire ahead, they will rush forward regardless of the consequences, just for the possible warmth. Sister is the stupid moth. Sister and Eighth rarely talk to each other. They had met a few times, but those few times made her determined to marry him.”

Mingyu glanced at me and said slowly, “Before my sister got married, she told me that she first noticed Eighth one spring day. She was about to leave the palace when she passed the marble bridge. Eighth was leaning against the railing to enjoy the view. From a distance, Eighth, surrounded by the white arch bridge and the green weeping willows, looked like a banished immortal. Untouched by the mundane world and people didn’t dare disturb him. My sister stood quietly for a long time in the distance before she had to cross the bridge. When my sister greeted Eighth, he turned around and smiled slightly, and turned away. Little did he know that my sister on the arch bridge had been watching him disappear for a long time and was still standing there. When he turned around a few traces of sadness in his eyes quickly disappeared made my sister’s heart, which had never known sorrow, feel lonely for no reason.”

She sighed and said, “From then on, she took every little thing about Eighth to heart. She would ask about his studies and his archery skills. When he won the emperor’s prize for his archery skills, my sister seemed happier than him. When Eighth was punished by the emperor for his poor handwriting, my sister practiced hard at home. That’s how my sister’s handwriting became so good. Because Eighth was smart and studious, he was favored by the emperor. When he was fifteen, the emperor ordered him to lead the Blue Banner Camp and accompanied the emperor to the desert. Later, because Eighth was brave and strategic, the emperor wrote a poem to praise him: ‘He personally takes charge of the army and never refuses to endure the wind and frost. He accompanies me day and night in the tent, and you should know about his hard work.’ When news got back to the Forbidden City from the desert, my sister copied the poem no less than a thousand times, chanting it over and over again, as if she had made those achievements on the battlefield. Eighth was conferred the title of Bei’le at the age of seventeen, the youngest among all princes. My sister, who never drank, was so happy that she got drunk at home. From childhood to adulthood, Eighth never knew my sister was there to accompany him in his every joy, sorrow, or anger and pain.”

I was stunned for a long time. These things had happened before I had arrived here. Eighth actually went to the battlefield himself? He was even praised by the emperor as “personally in charge of military affairs!”

“What are you thinking about?” Mingyu pushed me.

I came back to my senses. “I can’t imagine what Eighth looked like on the battlefield.”

“Yes! His appearance and temperament seem to be only suitable for drinking wine, discussing poetry and appreciating snow by the fire. But my sister said that Eighth is definitely not inferior to Lanling King on the battlefield.” Mingyu nodded and smiled.

I murmured, “He is a man of great talent and beauty, with a gentle appearance, but strong heart. Because his voice and appearance are both beautiful, he is afraid that he is not powerful enough. So he often wears a mask to face the enemy. He attacked the Zhou army at Jinyong City and with 500 knights he defeated the Zhou army’s heavy encirclement. He was the bravest of the three armies and the people of Qi admired him. They specially danced “Lanling King’s Battle Song” to imitate his appearance of commanding and stabbing.”

“No wonder my father and Fourteenth always say you’re so smart. I haven’t read much, but it seems to me that you said the same thing as my sister did back then.” Mingyu laughed.

I shook my head slightly and said, “I just picked up your sister’s words. I’m not the one who really understands.”

She lowered her eyes and remained silent for a long time, and then sighed. “From my uncle to my brother, I have done everything I could for Eighth. Even my marriage to Tenth was half because of him. But what about Eighth? His heart is not with you at all. What has your sister done? Even her smile is vague, although Eighth appears cold on the surface, he has always been protecting you in secret. That day my elder brother gave my sister a glazed screen with a unique painting on it. It was not an ordinary landscape, flower and bird painting, but a grassland scene. When your sister saw it, she gave it a few more glances. As a result, a glazed screen of the northwest Gobi scenery was delivered to your sister, not long after. Your sister was so angry that she immediately smashed the screen given to her.”

I sighed and said nothing. The two of us leaned against the tree trunk in silence.

“I can understand Minghui’s feelings, but she can’t take her anger out on my sister.” I said.

Mingyu snorted coldly, “Take out her anger? You really have never seen what taking out anger is. With your sister’s tactics and our family background, if she wanted to deal with your sister would she still be chanting in the Buddhist temples? It’s just that she can’t do it because of Yu Ping’er!”

I felt pity and anger at the same time. “My sister and Eighth are Rats so your sister can’t escape either.”

She stared at me and I stared back at her. We both burst out laughing after staring at each other.

She turned her head and said, “Even a clay figure has some anger, let alone someone as proud as you. You have been restrained enough!”

“I understand what you said, but she is my sister. It always hurts to see her being wronged, no matter how big or small.” I sighed.

“I understand. But now that we’ve talked it over, we shouldn’t argue any more, right? You don’t have to hide when you see me and he doesn’t have to be embarrassed.” Mingyu said.

I looked at her funny and asked, “He? Who is he?”

She glared at me with a smile, “Candied Haw Lu, how could you pretend to be stupid?”

I laughed. How things have changed in the world! Who would have thought that there would be a day when we would laugh at each other? As we laughed, we could hear the birds flying down from the trees, chirping in unison with our laughter.

She stood up and walked out from under the tree. “It’s time to go back.”

I followed her out.

She looked back at me and walked around the tree smiling. “Actually, I didn’t expect you to…”

Before she could finish speaking, a childish voice came: “There!”

I was about to look up to follow the voice, but my eyes blurred and a black shadow rushed in front of me. My waist tightened as I was quickly pulled aside. My mind was still numb when I heard the sound of Mingyu’s scream. I quickly calmed down and found I was tightly hugged by Fourth. The two of us were facing each other. We stared at each other in a daze. We stared at each other for a while and then we both suddenly reacted. I quickly got out of his arms as he violently let me go.

Still dazed, I looked around unconsciously. A white feathered arrow was nailed into the tree trunk, its tail still trembling. Mingyu was lying on the ground, hugged by Tenth. He helped her stand with a horrified look on his face.

In the distance, Hongshi, holding the bow and arrows stood blankly, a terrified look on his face. Two trembling eunuchs knelt at his feet.

Mingyu stood and patted her clothes. She angrily asked, “What’s going on?”

Tenth was three parts shocked and three parts frightened. He glared at Hongshi in resentment said angrily, “If I hadn’t come here by chance to look for someone, how much trouble would you have caused?”

The kneeling eunuch kowtowed heavily and replied, “I deserve to die! My master chased me here while shooting birds. I should have been more cautious! But I didn’t notice anyone behind the trees! I didn’t expect your wife to come out. I didn’t have time to remind the master and frightened her. I deserve death!”

Fourth looked at Hongshi coldly. “How long are you going to stand there?”

Hongshi was startled and hurried forward to kneel down in front of Mingyu. He kowtowed apologizing. Fourth looked at Hongshi kneeling and said solemnly, “You never checked carefully before doing anything. You just want to be the first.”

After paying her respects to Fourth, Mingyu said, “He didn’t do it on purpose. And no one got hurt. It’s no big deal if a child plays around.”

Fourth said, “Although Fujin does not mind, he still has to bear the punishment he deserves.” He paused and then shouted, “Why don’t you kowtow to show your gratitude?”

Hongshi kowtowed to Mingyu and then got up to run away.

Fourth said to the kneeling eunuch, “Go back to the steward and receive your punishment.”

The eunuch kowtowed and got up. He walked away with small steps.

I stood quietly to the side watching the scene in front of me, but my mind was elsewhere. Suddenly I saw a hand waving in front of me and I came back to my senses.

“Are you scared?” Tenth asked.

I smiled and said, “I’m just a little nervous. Nothing is wrong.”

Mingyu laughed. “Why is it that every time I’m with you, something always happens? I thought it would be different this time.”

Tenth looked at Mingyu in surprise. She glared at him and said, “Can’t I joke with Ruoxi! What’s the big deal?”

Tenth looked embarrassed, but also somewhat happy, and looked at Mingyu. Feeling embarrassed by his gaze she turned away. I burst out laughing. He came back to his sense, his face becoming more embarrassed. He scratched his head and said, “I’m leaving.”

He quickly bowed to Fourth and quickly walked away. I bowed to Mingyu and said with a smile, “Fujin, why don’t you go after me? You should be waiting in front!”

Mingyu glared at me and bowed to Fourth. She walked away slowly, she quickened her pace the further away she became, gradually disappearing from sight.

Fourth walk away. I shouted, “I have something to ask you!” He stopped but didn’t turn around. I approached him staring. “Why?” He was silent for a long time before answering bitterly, “Why? I don’t even know why myself. When I woke up I had already done it.”

I stared at the white feathered arrow in the tree trunk, feeling both happy and sad. It turned out I was still happy. At that moment he had chosen to block me. One moment was enough!

“You don’t have to think too much. If you give me time to think about it I will definitely not take the risk of doing this!” He said coldly.

I looked away and smiled. “I only know that you did it.”

He stared at me solemnly before quickly walking away. I turned around and smiled at his back. After he disappeared, I returned to the tree and gently stroked the feather on the arrow. Thank you, for finally making me understand and believe in some things!

I tried to pull out the arrow but it was stuck deep into the wood and I couldn’t move it at all. I wanted to find a small chisel, but I was afraid that someone might pull it out if I left. I had to pull on the arrow while looking around. Finally a eunuch was passing by in the distance and I called him over. He tried to pull for a while but wasn’t successful either. So he quickly went to find a chisel. After struggling for a long while we got the arrow out.

“Thank you so much!” I said happily. I wanted to gift him some money, but I had none on hand. “Were you on duty?”

He smiled and answered me clearly. I took note and turned, leaving with the arrow in my hands.

November 20th was the anniversary of Concubine Liang’s death. On the 21st we dared to go pay tribute and cut two bamboo branches to place in front of her palace gate. After the incident, I thought calmly, that her early departure was a good thing. When she left, everything was fine on the surface, although Kangxi was wary of Eighth. If she had witnessed Eighth being hated by Kangxi day by day, I’m afraid it would have been painful.

I was just day dreaming when I suddenly heard someone talking. I quickly hid behind a side wall. After a while, I heard footsteps stopping in front of the palace gate.

The voice belonged to Fourteenth. “The green bamboo on the ground don’t look like they’ve been thrown away casually. They must have been placed here on purpose.” There was no reply for some time. Finally Eighth spoke, “There are still dewdrops on the bamboo leaves. It seems that she had just left them not long ago.”

“It is unknown who released them. Someone who had previously held the concubine’s favor in private? It’s not clear if she had the intention now.” Fourteenth said.

Why did Fourteenth say that? But it’s fine. A long while had passed in silence and then I heard Fourteenth say to Eighth: “Brother, you have knelt for a long time in front of the concubine’s tomb yesterday, and today you are in such grief. If the Lady knew, she would definitely not want you to do this and hurt yourself!”

After another period of silence Eighth sighed and said, “Let’s go back!”

The footsteps of the two gradually faded away. I waited a while in the silence and then turned to the door. I walked back slowly.

[cinnamoodles]

hahahaha i hate myself so I have nine wips currently:

here they are!

wip one: chapter four, marigold

You were in no way enamored by him. Perhaps the many years of friendship you shared with the Viscount led your senses astray when it came to a man’s ability to charm a woman, but it was almost devastatingly clear that in that category, he had no ability. Perhaps he was interesting to talk to, but there was no future you could imagine with him, not like you would imagine with someone else. Perhaps if you escaped the country and joined a pirate crew, you could also escape whatever mess you had left your feelings in, ladylikeness be damned.

wip two: forever a priority

As if reading your mind, he smiled. “I know you were expecting your husband, but… he’s preoccupied at the moment. On the bright side, though, he’s got the fashion sense of a boiled potato, I think for your benefit, I’ll accompany you to the modiste.”

wip three: how you get the girl

You didn’t know if it was fate, perhaps, or the knot of anxiety in your stomach, eating away at your consciousness, or maybe the slow ticking of the grandfather clock in your room in your father’s house, monotonously droning on. It hadn’t ever bothered you before, but the heavy, thick droplets of rain and the concomitant thunderstorm merely accentuated the noise of the clock, pounding on your large, circular window.

wip four: insanity

It is another day. This day is no different from the last, and the day before that. This day will be no different from tomorrow. But who knows what mysteries today might hold? Whether I shall live another day? I am sorry, for whatever unfortunate circumstances you have been through to find me, and whatever remains of me. Perhaps I would have escaped here when you find me.

wip five: somewhere like this

The sun was blazing hot, no different from the other days. There seemed to be no end to the disparate hours of the day; the days were dusty and dry, while in the night, one could only huddle close to their blankets. In a town like this, some children chose to break free of the monotonous routine, soar high and escape through the glorious passage that one might call university. There were, of course, some who did not even attempt to travel down the path of academia, but they were never motivated throughout the course of their life.

wip six: love, unending

You’d met him on a warm summer’s day, when he was just beginning to master his horse riding. The breeze was cooling, but you, the hot headed, belligerent nine year old you were, couldn’t help but ask him for a race. In typical fashion for him, he challenged you that you wouldn’t even be able to stay on your horse the entire course. He was wrong, of course. He had been left in the dust, and you had ridden off, snickering.

wip seven: bananagrams

“Peel.” Her hand almost slipped off of her cheek, and she was sure her elbow was red from how long she’d been leaning on it.

“Peel,” was Val’s response. If Tiffany was in the mood, she would have pointed out that Caricaturistic was not a word.

She wasn’t in the mood.

wip eight: the mark

I wish I could be that joyful. It seemed she would be better at having the word “Joyful” than I am. School resumed the next day, as if nothing had occurred, though not very informative. They teach us, once again, about the history of our town, but mostly about why we get tattooed and why we have to stay in our place. If we don’t, the consequences are unknown, and according to my mother, nothing is more scary than the unknown.

wip nine: maelstrom

My heart seething,

My face unkept,

I could could have done anything,

But I just wept 

Abandon me, and go, be free

Forever I shall stay

Stuck under the sea.

please give me feedback on anything, (the last three are kind of old, if you want to see how my writing style has evolved), or tell me which wips you’d like to see completed! (please i’m so uninspired)

tagging: @eviesaurusrex @budugu @catastrxblues @avgvstlover @nix-rose @faye-tale @lucy-is-never-logical and open tag!

WIP tag game! Rules: Make a new post and post the latest line in your WIP & tag as many people as there are words (or as many as you feel like).

Thanks @hotgirleracas for the tag! 🖤 I'm still working on thee intersections of desire/isolation truck!fic (kneetouchnatural at this point), Astirism of a Ford F Series Pick Up.

He jerks away reflexively, and then with the careful precision of the slowly building heat, he eases his leg back over, until his knee and Cas' knee are lined up against eachother, knocking together whenever one of them shifts. It is probably a normal amount of touching, but he doesn't have a metric.

I know y'all have played already, but I'd love to get a lil update on anything else you've got in the works! @bloodydeanwinchester @ipromiseimawriter @luckshiptoshore (I know we *just* saw yours but I wanna see it again!)

Still don't have very many writing mutuals (that I'm aware of), so if you wanna repost and tag me I would love to read what you're working on!!! 🖤♠️

[gloryofroses19]

The Mixture

Iron Legacy Chapter 2

London, England - October 2012

Approaching the brunette furiously writing in a notebook, the man spoke “Good book?”

“I’m not sure yet” Samantha replied to the Cockney accent, not bothering to look up.

Attempting again to catch her attention, the man took a seat next to her at the bar,“Can I buy you a drink? My name is Neil.”

“No thanks, I’ve got one coming” was her response as she continued to write.

“Put it on my tab.” Neil said motioning to the bartender.

Finally looking up, Samantha turned to the man, “That’s very sweet” and continued to the bartender “but no thank you, I’m working.”

“Oh, a modern woman, I love a working girl. You can be Julia Roberts and I’ll play Richard Gere” Neil pressed on throwing Samantha a wink. “Maybe I should keep you company, so no other man makes the same mistake.”

Failing to suppress her eye roll, Samantha motioned to her notebook, “I appreciate how you want to be the savior of my reputation but I’m a little bust planning a drilling borer that uses sonic shock waves to help reduce our carbon footprint.”

“Schematic three really paints a picture” intoned an Irish accent.

Turning to the new voice, a smile broke out on her face, “what on Earth are you doing here?”

“Trying to escape the depressing eternal English rain.”

“I'm sure you know something about eternity.” Samantha mumbled taking in his devastatingly handsome disheveled leather clad form.

Enjoying the way her eyes took in his form, Druig ran a hand through his wet curls. “And then I walked in and saw you and thought I’d stop by to say hello so hello.” Druig said smirking at Samantha, “Goodbye” he finished to the man peering at the pair of brunettes.

Neither seemed to notice Neil leaving as they were too busy gazing at each other, blue ocean meeting the emerald earth. The few hours they spent together in Rio didn’t make them friends, but it did make them acquaintances and sometimes that’s all you need to want to know someone more.

“Want some company?” Druig questioned gesturing to the open seat next to her.

“I’d love it.”

“Then it would be m’honor.” Druig grinned as he sat down, “How long are you in town for?”

“Two more days, I have some meetings with European subsidiaries of Stark Industries.”

“I thought you didn’t run Stark Industries.” Druig replied before telling the bartender to bring him a pint.

Picking up her cup of tea, Samantha took a sip before explaining. “I don’t, Pepper is CEO, but Tony and I are still the owners while Tony continues to be the face and I sometimes help him invent things.”

“Like sonic drills.” Druig confirmed gesturing to her blue notebook.

“Like sonic drills” Samantha pushed the book aside.

“So why are you handling this instead of Pepper or Tony?”

“Pepper is currently napping at the hotel and Tony is on Avenger business about some crazy count in Italy and since shareholders tend to feel better when a Stark is present, here I am.”

Nodding along, Druig leaned in, “Well it seems that we were meant to meet again.”

Leaning in as well, Samantha raised an eyebrow at him, “I don’t know about meant to meet, it could just be coincidence.”

“Mmm I don’t know if the universe is ever that lazy.” Druig debated blatantly glancing at her glossed lips.

Beginning to feel warm under his heated gaze, Samantha moved back and rested her chin on her closed fist looking him up and down. “I wouldn't have ever put you down as someone who would believe in fate.”

“And why not?” Druig asked, feigning a wounded tone.

“Because you and your family literally set humanity on their current course. What we, mere mortals, would define as fate is actually immortals pulling the strings and placing us on a predetermined road.”

“That’s not true. Ajax never let us interfere with human conflict which is sadly the largest evolutionary catalyst. We merely pushed you in the right direction by killing Deviants thereby allowing you to procreate and helping inspire new inventions.” Pausing, Druig bumped his shoulder into hers, “For example, did I not just hear about two certain siblings creating a flesh healing serum which will revolutionize modern medicine?”

Laughing, Samantha nodded. “Yes, but it was largely born out of selfish pursuits. When you have a heroic older brother who decides to throw himself headfirst into fights, you’ve got to come up with methods to patch him up after.”

Noticing her bashful stare, Druig decided to push. “Plus, we ‘mighty immortals’ largely abandoned that job a few thousand years ago or were you too busy admiring my Adonis good looks last time we met to remember?” Druig couldn’t help but tease in order to enjoy the glow that was taking over Samantha’s cheeks. He couldn’t explain why ever since he had met her in Rio all those months ago, he hadn’t been able to get her out of his head.

“Can you honestly blame me though? It’s not every day you meet a tall, dark and handsome immortal promising to tell you about the wonders of the world.” Samantha teased back in an attempt to quell the butterflies in her stomach. Last time they met, his words had an immediate effect and Samantha was beginning to learn that this time was no different. It didn’t seem to matter that the feeling was familiar, it was the thrill of adrenaline all the same.

Druig chuckled to himself as he felt his cheeks warm under her mischievous stare. Living for as long as he has, Druig was no stranger to compliments. Whether it be from a thankful Babylon peasant who he saved from a beating to an Asgardian noblewoman looking for a way to find favor in Odin’s eye, Druig had heard them all. However, the compliment coming from Samantha felt different. Druig would go as far as to categorize it as dangerous, spreading seeds of something that could bloom into a garden.

“Oh, is that what I promised you? Then I seem to not be upholding my end of the bargain. And what wonder shall I regale you with today m’lady?”

Wanting to know more about the man in front of her, Samantha asked, “What’s your least favorite wonder?”

A smile broke out on his face, before responding. “I should have learned by now to expect the unexpected question when it comes to lovely, lovely Samantha.”

Druig knew the answer as soon as she asked it but he looked beyond Samantha to the pouring rain outside to buy himself time. “The ancient Aztec capital city of Tenochtitlan. It was the last time we were all together.”

Taking him in, Samantha noticed the faraway look in his cerulean eyes. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” Druig began sitting up straight taking on an air of haughtiness, “I left them for a reason.”

Not liking the display of arrogance being put before her, Samantha rebuffed his claim. “But you must be lonely, people in the village aren’t your family or friends. Surely you miss being around people who truly care for you.” Although she didn’t have the power to control minds, she was rich and that hypnotized people all the same. She was no stranger to people using and blindly following her in hopes of gaining favors and therefore, she knew how hollow it made you feel.

Turning to her, Druig’s Irish lilt took on a tone of cold indifference, “Tell me, do you miss your parents?”

“Not really… I barely knew them; I lost my parents when I was two. So, I guess you could say, I miss the idea of them more than them actually...”

Listening to her somber tone and avoidant eye contact, Druig felt immediate guilt for what he said. He knew she hadn’t meant harm in questions. If anything, he understood that she was trying to bridge the divide that had erupted within his heart caused by his family’s failures. In that moment, Druig realized that he had let his walls down without realizing around her and there was no time to build them again.

“I am truly sorry, losing family is never easy.”

Shrugging Samantha, met his gaze again. “It’s a sad part but not a sad life. I grew up in a loving family despite the tragedy. I had Tony and Jarvis and Anna and Rhodey and eventually, Pepper. I never felt like I was missing anything.”

“Anna?” Druig asked hoping to prolong the soft smile and light that had taken over her eyes as she thought of her family.

“Anna was Jarvis’ wife, the man, not the AI system named after him.” Samantha clarified with a laugh recalling Druig’s initial confusion. “She actually taught me how to cook, bake and all other necessary things a girl should know like always carrying a knife concealed in a lipstick tube.”

“Oh, I’d love to try it sometime.” A glutton for all things edible, Druig was curious to see what her skillful hands could come up in the kitchen. Plus, a promise of being able to see her again, was another treat that Druig couldn’t stay away from.

“My cooking or lipstick knife?” Samantha teased.

The brunette pair shared a laugh as they both eagerly waited for the opportunity to further understand the enigma in front of them.

A/N: Feedback is always appreciated!

Taglist: @7minutes-tomidnight , @keziahwrites , @carpediem1219 , @ofrosesandteacups , @bubblyyz

Link to Masterlist

[skiyoosmi]

if fate permits

⤷ chapter thirty: the thief and the fool

prev < masterlist > next

chapter notes. italicized texts are excerpts from the book yn is currently writing in the story

The universe, no matter how I look at it, is like a cylinder filled with incredulity, with things that always leave me flabbergasted. I won’t consider it a wonder because some of it definitely won’t put me in awe, nor would it be something I will be curious about. If anything, I am afraid of the universe and of what else it can bring to my life. It was, after all, the one that gave us this soulmate system, the very reason why I have this ragged black thread barely hanging on my pinky finger.

This system was probably a devil in disguise, an ocean with waves that will drown us until we no longer have air to breathe in, or maybe, it’s a black hole bound to suck up everything. If we ever manage to escape its grasp, we’ll still be left with no memory of the person who used to be that “everything.” It’s neither a gift, nor a curse; and it’s definitely not the magic little old me thought it to be.

It’s simply a thief— a thief who stole my angel, my buoy that kept me afloat no matter how scary and deep that ocean was.

For the umpteenth time of the night, you sighed as you read the words you have typed on your laptop. Fingers hovering over the keyboard, you felt the frustration building up inside you once again. For what reason? Everything– being unable to come up with a good storyline, your supposed-to-be soulmate, your missing memories and even the apparently inaccurate ones, and add that to the migration to a whole new country itself. Everything just felt so out of place.

“Writing got a bit too personal? It’s kind of all over your face, dear sister,” a very much familiar voice jokingly speaks from your doorway. Before you knew it, your body jumped out of your seat and ran towards your brother.

“‘Yoomi!”

He chuckles and due to the height difference between you, he manages to slightly lift you off your feet as he wraps his arms around your waist to return your embrace. He gives you gentle pats on your back like he once did when you were both still young, but all the sweetness comes to halt when he feels you beginning to shake. Releasing you from his hold, he takes a good look at your face, shushing you when he sees the tears cascading from your eyes, “Hey, hey. What’s wrong?”

“Everything’s wrong. I miss home and I just… I just want to remember, ‘Yoomi,” you replied to him, desperation evident in your voice. He only looks at you with sympathy, wanting so badly to just spill everything to you. But he was no god, he had no right to counter your fate. Even the simple action of coming here with Atsumu has already made him break the unspoken rule of going against the system.

“YN…” He trails off, “We already told you, there's a–”

“I know,” you cut him off, “There’s a reason why everything happened the way it happened. And I know you can’t tell me anything. Even mom refuses to do so and just keeps on saying that over and over again. But… don’t you think you’re all being too unfair right now? Just letting me be when clearly, I’m still suffering?”

But you were twins for a reason. If you were stubborn, it's only undeniable that Kiyoomi is too, if not much more. So without waiting for any of his replies, tired of hearing the same excuses you hear from your mother, you turn around and go back to your seat, “Sorry, ‘Yoomi. I guess I’m not really in the mood for some happy reunion right now. Maybe tomorrow. Please close the door once you leave.”

I wonder, what was it that was so wrong with me that we had to end up this way? Was I not pretty enough? Was the idea of being my soulmate so terrifying that you had to make me forget your entire existence? That you’d rather make me suffer like this?

It was foolish of me to believe this system in the first place. It said I wouldn’t be in agony anymore, that these feelings would be gone the same way as you and our memories.

But did you know? Did they know? Not being able to remember anything about you is much more painful than having an unrequited love for you. Because even if I know you will never look at me that way, I at least had our memories to cherish. So what am I supposed to do now that the only thing I had of you was taken away from me too?

After hearing the door shut, you bring your knees up to your chin, the cries you’ve been holding well just seconds ago finally escaping your lips, “You… just don’t understand.”

As he sat on one of the seats around the dining table, Atsumu can feel his heart hammering against his chest, almost as if it’s about to punch a hole out of it just so it could go to you. He knows that the moment you enter the room, he’ll only be met with nothing but disappointment. He already expects the frown on your face due to last night’s events that Kiyoomi told him, along with the look you’ll give him, the one where it’s as if he’s a stranger. Because technically speaking, he really is nothing but a stranger to you now. The love and care you once bore from him is nothing but fleeting memories for him now. Instead, in your heart, there is only indifference.

He’s ready, he swears, or maybe, he tries to convince himself he was. But one thing he’s sure of is that no matter how ready he was, it won’t lessen the pain he’ll feel once it actually happens.

He perks up upon hearing the light footsteps that are currently descending the stairs. From his peripheral vision, he can also see your brother gulping and your mother sighing, probably too nervous of what will be today’s outcomes. Seconds later, you came into view and Atsumu, this time certainly swears you still look as heavenly as the day he saw you as Cinderella.

Growing up, he has heard a lot of murmurs from adults about how they fell in love with their significant other in exactly three seconds. He thought it was foolish, impossible because how can someone fall in love so quickly with a stranger?

But as he looks at you, despite being in that childish Mickey Mouse pajamas you loved so much, he feels himself falling in love with you literally every second that passes, over and over again.

A light cough resonates from your mother, who was eyeing Atsumu, before she calls you over to eat breakfast. When your eyes finally landed on his figure, he was sure that his soul ascended to the where the gods were and his thoughts flew all over his mind, or maybe out of it, at this point he no longer has any idea what is happening. The only thing he sees is how you’re slowly approaching him, a lone tear falling down your cheek before you engulf him in a tight hug.

His eyes widened because this was not how it was supposed to go. You were supposed to just maybe bow to him out of respect then move on like nothing happened. So why? Why was he in your arms? Why are tears falling from his eyes too? Why are his arms tightening around you? Why can’t he let go of you?

“Samu…” you say, voice muffled, “I missed you.”

Oh.

“I…”

I love you, is what he wanted to say but as he returns to his reality, he finally spots your brother who was also shocked with your actions.

Right, you don’t remember me. You're not supposed to.

“I’m sorry but I’m not Osamu,” he mutters after pulling away from the hug and quickly wiping his tears away. A look of confusion forms on your face, brows furrowing. Kiyoomi quickly intervenes, “He’s Atsumu. Samu’s twin brother. He had to do something here in California that’s why I brought him with me.”

Your eyes lit up in understanding, immediately bowing in apology, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I thought… I thought Samu just lost his mind and dyed his hair blonde, I’m really sorry. To think I almost made fun of your hair, good thing Kiyoomi s- oh, wait no, you didn’t hear anything from me about your hair, it looks good on you I swear.”

Atsumu only chuckles, “It’s alright.”

In the midst of your apologies though, a realization dawns upon you, “Wait... I’ve known Samu since we were like, ten. How have I never heard of you?”

The two boys freeze, thousands of excuses running through their minds but none escape their mouths.

“YN, come now. We’ve made the food wait for too long now,” your mother gently calls but you don’t miss the way she tries to discreetly glare at Kiyoomi and Atsumu. You squint your eyes in suspicion, what are you all hiding from me?

The rest of your meal went by in silence, almost as if they’re too cautious to even let a word out in fear of spilling something you were not supposed to know. You were not dumb, and Kiyoomi was nowhere near being a good actor. His usual demeanor is still present but you still catch the way he looks at Atsumu, checking on him closely. If this was any normal circumstance, you would’ve simply let it go and just pass it off as a sign of concern for his friend.

But even your own eyes find themselves drawn to his presence. Maybe it was because he was the replica of Osamu, a friend very dear to you, and that you were just homesick. Or maybe it was for a different reason. But whatever it was, the longer you looked at the blonde, the more you felt determined to go through with your decision.

“One year,” you suddenly speak up, getting the attention of the three, “I’ll stay here for a year more and finish school but after that, I’m coming back home to Japan.”

Your mother gasped, “YN! You said you’ll stay here for go-”

“Whatever it is you’re hiding from me, whatever it is that you don’t want me to remember, I’ll make sure to find out. You don’t have to help me. I’ll remember my soulmate, even if it takes me my whole life doing so.”

Coming here, Atsumu didn’t really have any expectations. He just wanted to see you, that’s all. He just wanted to apologize even if you had no idea why. Just one smile is all he needed to finally let go of you. But as you spoke your words, instead of a proper goodbye, he finds himself uttering a thank you to the gods for giving him another chance instead.

ONE YEAR LATER, DECEMBER: HANEDA AIRPORT, JAPAN

The airport was as busy as the way it was when you left. Noisy chatters from different passengers were all over the place and while it was supposed to annoy you, it only brought a smile to your face and unlike the past months, you start to get filled with excitement once more.

You look up at the clear blue skies, trying to calm your heart that was rapidly beating, “Don’t be too happy yet, YN. After all, you’ve still got a soulmate to remember… or find.”

When I was young, I thought the consequences were just deserved. That it’s what you get for taking your soulmate for granted. But the more I mulled over it, the more I felt like the me who I have forgotten would think otherwise, that she’d think the same way I do now.

So even with these consequences, I refuse to concede with the fate that the universe gave me. No matter how many years it may take, be it a billion or even a gazillion, this heart is mine to control so, I’ll make it remember us. I’ll make it remember my love for you, the boy who once held my world, or rather, my universe. Because it’s you.

And because I’m a fool for you.

[buckysgoldenheart]

Angel in the Dark

Demon!August Walker x Reader

Summary: After a one-night stand, or what you thought would be one, a demon drags you to his world and forces you to grow wings like he has so you would have to stay with him, unable to permanently return to Earth.

Notes: (So this is like a one-shot that is little snippets/summary of something I might turn into a multi-chaptered fic. I’m not sure if I’m going to do that yet or if anyone would even like this idea, but if it seems a bit choppy, this is why.) I know its been an age and a half since i posted anything, but college, ya know? Also to those who have made requests, I have started all of them and they are to be posted next. I just started this fic a long time ago. I havent written anything for a while so it might actually kinda suck. 

Warnings: Implied smut, kinda. Unhealthy attachment on August’s end. If I make this chaptered then there would be actual smut. I think cursing. Eventual Stockholm syndrome if continued.

Words: 1713

 Angel in the Dark

You didn’t believe in fate, not really. You didn’t believe your life was predestined or anyone else’s to play with. It was yours alone, to make choices, good or bad. Only you decided when you did things and where you did them. And no one would have ever been able to convince you otherwise, until you met him.

Seeing him in that club, kissing him before you knew his name, now you couldn’t help but feel was in some way a trick, manipulated in his favor. That maybe bumping into him, quite literally, was his orchestration. Maybe whether you spoke to him or not, he had his sights set on you, and a one-night stand was never going to just get to be a one-night stand.

It was all too simple. Meeting you and not taking advantage, kissing you but following your lead, sleeping with you like you meant something to him. It didn’t add up. You could sense the kind of man he was; dominating and possessive. Too dominating and possessive to be as gentle with you as he had been. And all of it fell into a perfect line for what you now realized he wanted from you: not just sex, but more; nothing less than your life. But admitting all of that to yourself was entertaining the possibility that you were stalked like prey and any training at staying away from bad men had been a useless waste of time.

-------------------------------------------------

It was the third day, third of eight. August promised the pain would subside as the days passed, but so far he was proving to be a liar, not to your surprise. Every few hours, the wings ripped your skin wider to accommodate their size as they grew from the inside of your body pushing out. At three days, they were now the span of a couple feet, shining an opalescent white in the glare of the sun.

As you laid on your stomach, frozen in place against the mattress, wings bloodied and draped across your back with your eyes closed tight, you tried to understand the depth of the pain; how it was able to hurt the way it did. The feeling couldn’t compare to anything Earth may dare to offer. So different, so unnatural in its entirety, and indescribably excruciating. It was merciless, not letting you escape, not letting you find the will to walk without your bones threatening to crack. You could barely speak for fear fire would thrust itself up from your lungs and incinerate your throat. It was all-consuming, swallowing your body whole instead of localizing where the skin of your back had shredded open.

“Just a few more days,” August said, and you flinched at his voice. Every time he spoke it was a shock he was still there beside you, with his massive, black wings hanging over the back of the chair he sat in. Those monstrosities weren’t attached to his muscled back when you met him; nowhere in sight when he was in your bed.

August dabbed at your broken and bleeding skin with a cool cloth, eliciting little whimpers passed your chapped lips. “I know it hurts, Angel.”

“Don’t—" You forced out despite the heat in your throat, acid on your tongue, waves of nausea you knew would follow. “…C-Call me that.”

He sighed and continued to wipe the blood from your naked body. “I wish you wouldn’t say that. When the time is up, you’ll feel so much better about this, about me, and you’ll see how beautiful they are. You’re already so gorgeous, the wings will only add to your beauty.”

“I di-didn’t want--

“Don’t talk, Angel,” he said. “I know how you’re feeling about this right now, but humans are not allowed to live in this world. I had to do this so you can stay.”

You screamed as the wings tore your skin open a few more centimeters, and August quickly scooted his chair closer to brush the hair from your face.

He softly shushed you the way one might soothe a kitten, before leaning down and placing a kiss to your sweaty forehead. “It’s ok. I’m not going to leave your side.”

You would have slapped at him, pushed him away with all your might if you had the strength, but your lungs were tightening, body burning as if it had been licked by the sun. You were dying, slowly morphing into a horrid creature from fantasies, leaving behind any trace of humanity. In your veins you could feel something coursing and altering your DNA. You knew you still looked like you, for the most part, but you weren’t you, not anymore. All because you met a man who got attached and wouldn’t let you go. All because he couldn’t remain in your world and decided with certainty that if he couldn’t be in yours, he would drag you to his. A place some believed in and some didn’t, a place no one could prove the existence of, now your iron cage.

 ------------------------------------------------

It was five more nights of torture before you felt like you could really breathe again, and even then, the oxygen was just as foreign as the pain you had trudged through, and you found little comfort in it fully filling your lungs.

“You’re awake.”

His smooth voice drew your eyes away from the scenery out the bedroom window; the first glimpse of true, heavenly beauty you’d seen since he brought you here. But you weren’t convinced it wasn’t an illusion crafted by his devilish fingers for your comfort. Much like his own beauty, a trick tempting you to call off your desire to leave this world and go home. You tried your best to ignore how perfect he looked; the curls of his hair, the scruff of his jaw, the black wings you first saw the night you met him when they had suddenly appeared only after you’d slept together.

“And you’re standing already. I hoped to come help you, but you’re clearly much stronger than I was after I had to grow my own wings.”

Your eyes flashed in anger before your tore them away from his, back to the rolling hills overlapping one another outside your window. The breeze rustling your hair, the chirp of the birds, the glisten of the sun off the small lake dotted in the landscape, distracted you from August’s approach. You stilled at his breath hitting the back of your neck, but when he slipped his rough fingers through the layers of your shimmering feathers you couldn’t contain the shiver that shot through your body. His own black ones ruffled when his skin touched his creation.

“So beautiful,” he whispered.

“I’m glad you’re proud of your work.”

August let out a puff of air, a weak laugh. “My work? Angel, this was all you. I knew they would be beautiful if they were going to be a part of you, but you really outdid yourself.”

Twisting your body fast, you met him chest to chest, your eyes burning with a heat to match the devil. “I outdid myself? You forced this on me. You injected me with that—that poison without my permission.”

“And you survived. Not many can say the same. You’ve come out stronger.” Fingers trailed through your feathers again and you ignored the heat it sent to your core.

“I’ve come out of this wanting to kill you more than I did before,” You said, shifting the wing back and away from his reach.

Without a moment to pass, August gently grasped your chin between his thumb and index finger as his gaze landed on your lips. “That will fade with time,” he whispered, then inched his face closer. You shoved him away just before his lips could meet yours, and August stumbled back with a chuckle. “Certainly stronger.”

“I’m not going to let you kiss me,” you snapped.

“Not today, it would seem.”

“Not ever again!” Somehow the words felt wrong, each one more sour than the last. Wrong, as if your lips called to his and a portion of your mind was so disappointed at the fight you were going to force it through by trying to keep yourself away from him. But it was a small portion, and the rest of you was much stronger.

“We will see, Angel,” He crossed his arms. “You and I have eternity. One day you will wake up and realize I am all you have, I am all you want, and this memory will be lost. All you will know is me and my touch and our world.”

As he spoke, his eyes held a gentle sincerity that you wished wasn’t there. You wished the blue of them wasn’t so calm and casual and certain of the way he was feeling. Shaking your head, you matched his stance. “You’re a monster,” you said. “You really are, and here I thought I’d seen the worst of monsters, but clearly not.”

August slowly stepped back into your space again, catching you off guard with a flush to your cheeks as he loomed over you. But you kept his stare, even with your back against the wall, wings spread against the stone. “You may breathe your sweet words all you’d like, Angel, but it changes nothing,” He said, running a knuckle down your cheek. “If I am a monster, I am your monster, and I’m not going anywhere.” Smiling, his eyes glanced at your lips again. “Luckily for me…neither are you.”

Tags:

@agniavateira​ @tumblnewby @forthebrokenheartedthings​ @summersong69​ @starlite13​ @mstgsmy​ @purplelove75​ @defffcc​ @the-soot-sprite​ @kissthatlifeaway​ @atomicpaperhairdouniversity​ @aquariuslavenderhoney​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @the-problem-of-leisure​ @amberlokabrenna​ @a-dlv​ @writing-about-current-obsessions​ @weallhaveadestiny​ @coffeebreathy​ @madbaddic7ed​ @petitefirecracker10​ 

[foilfreak]

Beauty and Her Beast: Summary and Ch.1

A Salvatore Moreau x Female!FishMutant!oc fic based on this idea I had the other day that a very specific subset of the fanfom went absolutely apeshit for, which I'm here for and decided to act on. I can't make any promises for consistent uploading or even a finishes product by the end of this, but so long as im still interested in working on it, I'll keep working on it, and if im not, then I wont, plain and simple. Anyways, here's the summary and chapter 1, please let me know what you think of the story so far, i hope you all enjoy (you'd better all enjoy), and I can't wait to see you all again for chapter 2. Bye! <333 (Link to ao3 posting will be in comments so check there if you want to read it there instead)

Warning: This fic is rated NSFW and contains graphic depictions of things some people may find disturbing or alarming, including, but not limited to: violence, gore, unhealthy family relationships, Oedipus complexes, gratuitous amount of pornographic literature, ableist language, physical, mental, and emotional abuse, etc. If you are someone who does not enjoy fiction with these elements in them, then I suggest you refrain from reading this, because this fic will have all that, and probably a lot more. So, this is your first and final warning to turn around and go somewhere else if stuff like this just isn't your vibe, because from this point forward, your emotional wellbeing is in your own hands, and I will not be accepting blame if you disregarded my warnings and ended up reading something you didn't like. Idk why I feel compelled to write one of these despite this being Resident Evil fanfic, but I figured I'd cover my ass just in case.

Summary:

Now, I’m sure everyone already knows the ancient tales that tell of a beautiful young woman slowly falling in love with a horrific monstrosity of a man. The pure and true love this innocent beauty comes to feel for him, despite his terrifying appearance, is the key that breaks the cruel and twisted curse under which he’d been kept prisoner. This allows the man behind the monster to not only return to his true human form, but then go on to live his Happily Ever After with the beauty who saved him. Everyone already knows of these tales, as well as the messages behind them, however that is not quite the way this particular tale plays out.

The tale I am about to tell bears many similarities to the one above, however there are also quite a few important differences. For while the original detailed a beauty falling for a monster because of the kind and loving man he was behind his hideous exterior, this is a tale of a beauty, with a few monstrous qualities of her own, falling in love with a kind and loving monster, not at all despite his grotesque appearance, but rather, in part, because of it.

This is a tale, where the Beast still falls for his Beauty first, but the Beauty is the one who will be pursuing her Beast.

Chapter 1: Mother's Gift

Few of those who lived isolated from the outer world, high up in the mountains of Romania, would expect anyone of reasonable sanity to be out traveling in this hellish sort of weather. The wind howling a demonic high pitched tune; snow, sleet, and hail pounding into the ground like an endless shower of bullets from the heavens; and hungry lycans still roaming the area, tirelessly looking for their next meal, would be enough to incentivize even the strongest of mortal men to seek shelter away from the deadly conditions of the outside.

A man by the name of Salvatore Moreau however, one of the 4 lords of this mountain region who lived in the reservoir just past the windmills, did not appear terribly concerned with what other people thought of the traveling conditions. Completely unbothered by the horrifying weather and threat of suddenly being ground into doggy food, the hooded man trudged his way through the dark and barely maintained snow paths. Starting at the reservoir and making his way toward the village, Salvatore moved as quickly as his deformed body would permit, an unusually chipper spring added to his lumbering hobble of a walk.

Mother had a gift for him.

Yes, a truly joyous day it was whenever Mother Miranda called upon him to join her and the other lords for a meeting. Miranda was usually so busy with her experiments that she rarely had time to visit her children outside of these ‘family meetings’ they’d been having recently. However, it would appear as though Mother has come up with a solution of some kind to this problem and wishes to share it with them in person. Whatever this solution is, the mutated man has no idea, as Mother Miranda had been quite vague in her message, however the fact that Salvatore was being given the chance to see his radiant mother AND receive a gift from her, all in one day, was more than enough to make up for how agonizingly lonely he’s been these last few months since winter set in, as well as how agonizing it was for him to walk in this weather.

Salvatore arrived at the usual meeting site just as the clock struck 8pm, precisely as Mother had instructed. However, much to the hooded man’s confusion, when he turned the handle on the large wooden door to enter the room, he quickly realized that he was currently the only one present. This was especially strange considering that, usually, at least one of his siblings was always present a little earlier than necessary, usually Alcina or Karl, but occasionally Donna with Angie in tow.

Mother had clearly said in her message that she wanted to start the meeting at 8pm sharply, so where on earth is everyone?

“Moreau” Mother Miranda’s voice called out, immediately pushing all thoughts from Salvatore’s brain as her powerful, yet lucious voice echoed against the halls of the room like a choir of angels.

“Y-yes! W-what… is it… M-mother Miranda? I-i-i came to you… j-just like you asked” Salvatore responds, bowing his head in reverence as he slowly crosses the room and approaches the otherworldly woman.

“So you did, though I suppose you coming exactly when I call makes the most sense. You always were the most obedient of my children” the woman remarks with casual disdain, her voice devoid of any sort of motherly affection or tenderness. Despite the clear disgust and disregard with which Miranda regards the hooded man standing before her, her words light Salvatore’s soul ablaze, filling his mangled body with intense feelings of heat and desire that melt his heart of the cold, icy frost that had frozen it over the course of the long winter.

“Y-y-yes, y-yes of c-course, Mother M-Miranda! I-i would… I would do any-anything... for y-you. A-anything you s-say... anything y-you n-need… I’d d-do it... f-for you. W-without question!” The deformed man says, practically getting on his hands and knees and crawling as he neared closer and closer to Miranda, stopping only when he’d arrived just in front of the steps the raven mother stood upon, his gaze trained at the ground as he knelt at her feet, awaiting his fate at his mother’s hands.

“I know you would, Moreau,” Miranda says cooly, gently brushing the palm of her hand against the black fabric that covers the top of Salvatore’s head, “which is why I’ve called you here today; to reward you for your loyalty and service to me thus far.”

Salvatore sinks sharp and jagged teeth into the flesh of his bottom lip, nearly drawing blood as he desperately tries to silence the needy whine that wanted to tear its way from the back of his throat. His body shivered and twitched in unimaginable delight from the sudden tender caress to his sensitive skin. How long had it been since someone had touched him so gently? How long since someone had spoken to him with such kind and soft words. Took the time to gather presents as a reward for years of faithful servitude? How long since someone had loved him like this?

‘Too long’ the disfigured man sighed to himself, reveling in the soft, gentle contact for as long as he is able.

“Moreau. Look at me” Miranda commanded firmly, and despite not wanting his beloved Mother to be forced to bear witness to his hideous face, he complied, lifting his head up and back to allow his gaze to lift from the floor and up at the glowing figure that was his Mother, his beautiful, incredible, intelligent, majestic mother.

The light shining down from above illuminates Miranda from behind. From Salvatore’s perspective on the floor, the light darkens her face and most of her torso and waist, giving a softened, almost ethereal glow around Miranda’s figure. This, along with the rest of her garb, makes Mother Miranda appear even more like the holy woman that Salvatore naively believes she still is. Despite her less than affectionate treatment of him thus far, Salvatore still stared up at the darkened face of Mother Miranda, his eyes shining with reverence, love, desire, and unending devotion.

“Y-yes... Mother?” Salvatore breathed, barely able to speak above a whisper as Miranda stepped away, gesturing for him to follow.

“Are you ready to collect your gift now?” The raven mother asks, speaking more softly than before and even holding her hand out to Salvatore, her pose and appearance mirroring that of a powerful god taking mercy upon her wretched follower, reaching out to reward the years of faithful servitude and worship.

Salvatore, barely able to keep himself calm as he stumbled to his feet, did not grace Mother Miranda’s question with a proper response, instead practically racing to take the woman’s outstretched hand in his own.

“I’m ready Mother… I-I’m ready for... my g-gift now… can I… c-can I have it n-now… p-please?” Salvatore begs, pulling at Miranda’s hand like an overly excited child, seemingly unaware of the disgusted twist of her face when the hooded man’s cold, slimy fingers firmly latched onto hers.

“Of course, my child” Mother Miranda says, pulling her hand back from Salvatore’s and instead placing it along the man’s hunched back, beginning to guide him to wherever it was the raven mother had hidden his gift.

As Salvatore limped next to Mother Miranda, the deformed man couldn’t help but wonder what exactly it was that Mother had gotten for him. Was it a new cloak, to replace the worn one he was currently wearing? Perhaps a new set of romance films so he didn’t have to rewatch the ones he already owned over and over again anymore? Or maybe it was something to help with his digestion?

It would be nice to get his chronic acid reflux under control again.

Regardless of what the gift actually turned out to be however, Salvatore was merely pleased that he was finally getting a chance to spend time with Mother Miranda all by himself for a change.

Maybe, if he was lucky, she’d even agree to hold him, just like she always did back when he was still undergoing cadou treatment.

Oh how wonderful that would be!

[candiedjellybean]

Currently very excited by my own writing, I just recently came up with this concept and it is taking over all thoughts!! Courtesy of me reading a ton of bkdk soulmate aus that led to this.

I now have a bakudeku fic in the works where Deku and Kats are soulmates but it's also very irregular. They keep breaking and reforging their soulmate bonds, and it's caused for the most part from their turbulent relationship. But even more interesting, every time they reinstate their connection, it's a different kind of soulmate bond.

And here's a snippet of a draft under the cut! Probably will get rewritten because it's definitely kind of word vomit right now, I am just super excited!! I got the fic up right here if you wanna read the first chapter.

Their soulmate bond had dissolved again when Izuku had received One for All. The words that were branded on their arms for months were replaced with one of the most common manifestations, identifying marks. 

Izuku saw the ink bleed back into the color of his skin and he felt a small prickle of electricity where All Might was patting his back. There was a yellow star, with 8 points around it in the center of his back. All Might's right hand now held the image of a bright green star with 9 points. 

"Huh. I guess we're soulmates,” Izuku remarked, “Did that happen with you and the last user of One for All?" 

"Yes, but may I ask, why did the words on your arms go away?"

"That's just how my soulmate bond with Kacchan works, I guess. It disappears and reappears as a different one. Nobody really knows why. It'll reappear as a soulmark whenever we see each other again." 

"As long as you are okay, my boy.”

“I’m fine! I can do the entrance exam and take that first step!”

“Speaking of which, it’s in 3 hours! Hurry up and go before you’re late!"

Izuku rushed off to take a shower at home and packed a bag before heading to the entrance exam. On the way in, Katsuki shoulder checked Izuku lightly, and he could feel the sharp electric burn of their bond reforging. He knew the mark would be on his shoulder, but resisted the want to check what it looked like. 

Realigning his thoughts, he set off to the building, but immediately tripped and nearly fell flat on his face. He felt a cool touch on his calf, and was staring at his future classmate, Ochako Uraraka. 

He didn't say anything but he pulled up his pant leg curiously as she apologized for using her quirk on him. When she noticed the image of a pink scale with one half of it seemingly upside down and being pulled up was on his leg. A soulmark.

"Woah! Are we soulmates?!" 

"Uhm… Yes?" Izuku said nervously. He wasn't too sure but the symbol was staring right back at him and it didn't feel like there was any other explanation, especially since his bonds were now all markings.

"Aghhh, this is so nerve-wracking! Good luck to us both, new soulmate!" 

She dashed off into the building. Izuku went in shortly after, not wanting to be late after running so much of the way and catching the train just in time. His nerves ate at his stomach, and the electricity buzzing under his skin left over from the 3 soulmarks that had manifested left him jittery. 

At the end of the day, he wasn't sure he passed, and was so busy he forgot all about the new soulmarks he'd earned that day, until he was in the bathroom ready to shower and then collapse into bed. He felt an odd surge of sadness and elation at the sight. The yellow star on his back, the pink symbol on his calf, and the one he refused to look at before now, the bright orange image of an explosion, complete with gray smoke sat on his shoulder. 

He loved the soulmarks adorning his skin, they were beautiful and were for connections he already had or were going to make. For the first time, Izuku absolutely dreaded the next time his soulmate bonds would dissolve. He never thought much of the process before, other than that it sucked and that he wished that fate didn't decide to get so fickle with him and Katsuki. 

Maybe he truly was cursed.

[yournameyn]

Feeling Deeply Chapter 5

Genre: Arranged Marriage Fic. Fluff turning into angst?

Pairing: Namjoon x OC

Summary: The story of two deeply feeling nerds who find themselves in an arranged marriage. (Details here). Our OC is called Brishti. It’s a Bengali name meaning rain. Namjoon calls her Rim (short for her pet name, RimJhim which means the pitter-patter of rain). She calls him Joon.

Warnings: NOT THE NAMJOON OF OUR DREAMS. Argument. Fight over tiny discrepancies that turn out to be a huge problem. Domestic violence. Not a happy chapter.

A/N: Have you ever felt this, reader? When you watch something and realise exactly what you need to realise in that moment? I’ve had that so many times - seeing my feelings mirrored in a show. That’s something that I’ve tried to have Brishti feel here. Also, this is how I see the natural progression of this Namjoon, the one who obliged to duty rather than his dreams. It took me a long time to write this but I love what’s come out. Let me know what you think!

Current Chapter: London, late 1963. Love fully blooms between Namjoon and Brishti. And yet, something’s not right. A visit to the ballet and a conversation brings forth realisations. The inklings that Brishti was trying to avoid transform into writing on the wall.

Previously in Feeling Deeply: Preface Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Chapter 5

The magic about new love isn’t really in romance or even in true intimacy. It’s in how violent new love is… and just how much time it takes us to feel it’s impact.

In the new love between Namjoon and Brishti, everything had been roses and honey, overflowing, swaying in a gentle breeze. They spent every second possible in each other’s arms. They had to tear themselves away from each other when they had to leave home. And even then, it hurt as though they were part of the same cloth.

Brishti had thought about how they had become woven, their souls an ornate tapestry. Namjoon had told her then about a Japanese tradition of weaving that was a sort of meditation and a kind of worship to a god called ‘Musubi’. The disciples say it is like being part of the cosmic tapestry. Being tied to each other.

“Just like we are… I felt a pull toward you and I followed it. I was scared… so full of doubts about who you were and how this was all going to go… I had promised myself that I would fulfil my duty… whatever happened ” Namjoon had said, petting Brishti’s hand gently, “And I… I still can’t believe it… It… you make me feel like I can… trust myself.” Brishti had looked at her genius then and wondered what a strange world it must be that made a man like Namjoon doubt himself, “Always, always trust yourself, Namjoon-ah.” and settled into the crook of his neck.

It was indeed a strange world that caused Namjoon to build an armour around himself. Because ‘London’ and ‘Lonely’ sounded just the same to him. His years alone in this strange place had been unkind, unrelenting. Brishti had been the only softness he had felt in a long long time. Armours built over years can break in an instant, though. For him, it was the moment when he and his wife had crossed the threshold to becoming lovers. High on the magic of new love, he had not realised it.

Sitting across from each other after that fateful evening, Namjoon and Brishti were both wide awake in the early hours of the next morning. Brishti buttoned up the shirt they never fully took off. Namjoon had tickled her with his toes. They propped their feet against the other’s to see just how vast the difference was (he melted seeing how small her feet were and hadn’t stopped playing with them since). Caressing each toe, he remembered something he wanted to ask -

“How did you know what Saranghae is?”

“Mm…” she stretched her arms, “I know what it means…” Brishti said.

“I know you know… from the way you… after I said it… You asked Yoongi about it?” Namjoon cautiously asked about the only other Korean Brishti knew. To his surprise, she nodded no, still denying him any information. Namjoon had to tickle her foot for the answer.

“Okay! Okay! Wait! Pleeeease!” Namjoon stopped and Brishti bent down to the bureau next to her bed and pulled out a textbook - LEARN HANGUL THROUGH ENGLISH. Namjoon looked more shocked than she had expected. “I asked Yoongi about the book-”

“You don’t need to Rim… I’m not learning Bangla, am I?” Namjoon said. He was touched but he didn’t want his love to do anything he couldn’t reciprocate.

“I would have asked you to learn it… if I wrote poetry in my mothertongue...” Brishti said. Namjoon was shocked. She went on, “You really think I didn’t know?”

Namjoon blushed and smiled and flopped over in Brishti’s lap. She brushed his hair as she explained, “You light up at the mention of lyrics and poetry, you keep a notebook by your side at all times, you’re moved by the things that people usually don’t pay attention to… I know you’re a poet, Joonie.”

Namjoon looked up at her and said, “No one has ever called me that…”

Brishti leaned down and kissed her gorgeous husband. “You are... From what I know, I bet all my books that you are a great one... And… I… I would love nothing more than to be part of your world of words, Joonie… It must be strange… to be understood but in a foreign language. If you would let me, I want to understand you in your language… Do you think that’s something maybe--”

He got up and all but jumped on Brishti, pinning her down to the bed with the cutest puppy-yell she had ever heard. “Yes! Of course, yes!”

They both understood that this was a proposal. The truest kind - a gentle request to explore Namjoon’s universe. They would later joke about how she proposed to him after a month of being married. Namjoon was completely delighted by this person with him, his person… one who really saw him.

He pulled her to him saying, “You’re the best part of my world, Rim...” and kissed her.

Each moment of love flowed through the next. When they had to be separated, they couldn’t wait for the next one, their moment again. On weekends they would visit museums and find their favourite paintings and sculpture or their favourite prehistoric relic and animal. Brishti hated the fact that Namjoon had to work overtime to compensate for these weekends and she often voiced how unfair it was.

In response Namjoon would just give her a peck and say, “As long as I have you, I’m happy.” This pricked her but she was too taken by the man before her to pay heed to it.

Namjoon was just about able to keep a straight face at work but everyone around Brishti was acutely aware of how much she loved Namjoon.

At one point, her colleague and best friend, Min Yoongi had yelled at her, “Yhaaaaa! Stop blushing?! It’s just a clock… what could be romantic about a clock?!” Sayuri-san, and she were hanging around Yoongi’s table when Brishti looked at his new flip clock and started blushing.

Brishti laughed along with everyone else but explained, “It’s involuntary… that’s what happens when you’re married to a poet.”

Sayuri-san corrected, “I know too many wives of poets to know that’s not necessarily true… It is true though, when you’re in love with a poet… Go on… tell us how exactly poet Namjoon makes you blush about a clock...”

Brishti blushed even more at that. Yoongi rubbed his arms and demanded, “Tell us because there’s some really weird things coming to my mind… like you guys have an exact time when...”

Brishti stopped his imagination, “No no no… it’s nothing like that… he loves digital clocks... because he loves to watch the time turn to 00:00… zero o’clock he calls it… and on days he feels sad, it’s like zero o’clock is always there to comfort him… like it’s a point when the whole world holds its breath and he can feel happy again… but these days… with me… he said he wants the clock to keep going after 23:59… he wishes time would stretch on… beyond 24:01…”

Yoongi sighed and sat back down, “You’re making me fall in love with Namjoon… ahhh that is beautiful. He should be published...”

“Imagine him saying this directly to you and you might know how I feel… I can’t stop talking about him...”

“Oh, we know. But honestly none of us care… your poet-librarian romance is getting us through our single-ness.” Yoongi reassured her.

The three of them continued to talk about the ways in which Brishti could repay Namjoon’s wordsmithing in graphic ways.

It was that evening, wasn’t it, when Namjoon had enveloped her back in the warmest hug as soon as he’d entered their flat. Brishti was in the kitchen when she heard him enter but hadn’t expected this. He kissed her neck while telling her the good news, “We got our first Korean client today… because of me… Mmmm… Why do you always smell so amazing?”

Brishti turned around and hugged him again, “That’s amazing! Namjoon-ssi! I’m so proud of you!”

“He’s from a wealthy family… so he can actually afford our firm… its not exactly the work I wanted to do--”

“It is a step toward that idea, right? It’s still good work, fighting for justice?” Brishti asked, stopping him from undermining his own work.

Namjoon nodded, “Yeah… He’s a dancer… Park Jimin. All the posh types know him as one of the best dancers in the Royal Ballet. They call him Jim… as if it’s too difficult to say Jimin?” Namjoon shook his head in disapproval. He began helping Brishti with the chopping and continued, “He was born in the UK and trained since he was 5... He got into the Royal Ballet but he’s been passed up to be a principal over and over even though everyone who has seen him dance apparently knows that he’s far far better… So recently he spoke to the director there... and of course the director made a racist slur and asked not to bother him with this again. He can’t even quit and work at another company because of the contract they have him on. There’s a non compete clause… meaning he won’t be able to dance with any other company. That’s all he wants… to be able to get out of that contract… I’m hoping to convince him to press charges on racial discrimination too. We’re not in the 20s anymore.”

When Brishti didn’t respond, Namjoon looked up at her. “That’s horrible… I’m so so glad you’re taking up the case. But please tell me what you ate when you were alone?” He looked down at the carrot he’d been failing to cut.

Namjoon scrunched his nose and admitted, “Canned food mostly.”

Brishti said, “I’m really really glad you’re getting to do work that you are passionate about, Joonie, you deserve it. Now, you should know how to cut a carrot.”

Namjoon pressed up against Brishti’s back. She reached back up to the nape of his neck and made him moan into her. Then… then Namjoon made her forget how to cut carrots.

He had these ways… Namjoon, with his touch, his voice, his languages both spoken and soundless. He was lighting new paths into her self. She loved learning him. Paths she didn’t know existed, that she’d been longing for.

The scars of the loneliness, emptiness that Namjoon had experienced had turned his longings into a kind of starvation. He needed to be nourished and also devoured. Brishti was just the creature to do it. He could feel her warm fingers trace rows of pleasure onto his skin. He felt them bear down and singe when the two of them had to move away from each other. He felt those ropes tug at him as the end of his workday neared. Namjoon closed his eyes each night at her touch, the feeling and fragrance of her body. He felt blooms of intimacy spring up like seedlings out of the soil of his skin. And deeper. In the earth of his soul. So he did the only thing he could. Reciprocate. Namjoon sowed his love, his desire, his need onto her, into her every night.

There were times, though, when she would feel his absence in the middle of the night and see him working in the dim light of a lamp. She knew he had to work hard to do what he wanted but she also saw he had to continually prove himself to people who weren’t even paying attention. The reason they weren’t paying attention was painfully clear to Brishti but she was yet to experience it’s full stab.

Namjoon wanted to shield her from it. He was counting on an armour that didn’t exist anymore to protect himself and his wife… the reason he liked his life again. Whenever she came out and switched on a brighter light, reprimanding him for straining his gorgeous eyes, he saw that it did prick her - this world and the unfairness he had to endure. She would say something small, an almost-complaint that alerted him… against her for some strange reason. She would say something that would be easy to ignore and yet would prick him, like - “I don’t know why they haven’t promoted you yet.” or “Why haven’t they taken up Jimin’s case yet? You’ve worked so hard on it.” Everytime she did that, he would have to pacify himself.

‘I’ve told her so much about the Jimin case… she’s just really invested’ Namjoon thought to himself. Just so he would avoid thinking, ‘I shouldn’t have told her.’

He would have to calm himself, give her a peck and try to convince her to stop worrying. “As long as I have you, I’m happy.” Namjoon would always say.

Then, Brishti smiled as she always did. While trying to understand why that sentence bothered her so much. After almost five months of exploring this wonderful man, some part of him still felt unfamiliar… like it didn’t fit in with the rest. Still, these things take time, she had heard from so many women over the years. Besides, she was blessed with a man far far above the norms. So, how could she prod? These are things Brishti had told herself - until the night she couldn’t stay silent.

The couple was coming up on their fifth month together and Park Jimin had gifted Namjoon a ticket to the final show of the season as a token of gratitude, for having heard his story.

Brishti was nervous about going to this kind of a gathering and had told her husband to meet her there.

She had enlisted the help of Sayuri-san to look appropriate for the event. Her slightly longer hair was clipped and her eyes were kohled. She wore a burgundy knee length fringe-ended dress that she had received from her gracious host, stylist and make-up artist - an inheritance of her brilliant life tucked into the black pearl beading and deco design. It was a big departure from the usual tie-die or band tees and jeans with her baggy coat. She had carried the coat but felt this strange sort of compulsion to stand in the cold air in the noodle strap dress, for him to see her.

She felt butterflies in her stomach and kept fiddling with the coat she had draped over her arm. It was electric when she saw him.

Namjoon looked gorgeous in a tux. All of Brishti’s nerves were soothed just by looking at him. He had brushed his hair back. Tall and dashing - better than any heathcliffe could ever be. And with his reading glasses, he looked like the lead of a romance novella that would make all the women swoon. Indeed she was swooning. Brishti was suddenly warm in the chilly, windy night. And when Namjoon saw her, blood rushed to her cheeks. Everything inside her was running helter skelter in a panic. Brishti felt everything drop in the few moments it took for Namjoon to reach the top of the stairs. Dolled up like this, outside of her element, she felt like an imposter. Some angel needed to be standing in her place. For the first time, feigning beauty, Brishti felt like she wasn’t worthy of her husband.

She was finally able to keep her feelings aside when he reached her.

Namjoon kissed her palm like a gentleman and whispered in her ear, “Let’s go home… I need a private kind of dance…” Brishti blushed. Namjoon put his arm around her and felt the chill that had settled on her skin. “Aren’t you cold? Why didn’t you wear the coat?” Namjoon asked. Brishti just shook her head no and the two of them walked in.

Brishti assumed that the ballet would be a welcome distraction from the storm that brewed within her. She had read up about the show, the piece they were going to perform -

Tchaikovsky’s venerated Swan Lake. The story of a young girl who falls in love with a prince who promises to save her but fails. Ofcourse there were finer nuances to the story but this was the basic plot. As the lights dimmed, Brishti felt pulled in by the music, the eerie beauty of it’s melody played in perfectly with the questions that were swirling around in Brishti’s mind -

Why do I feel wrong?

Is this what Yoongi was talking about? Anxiety…?

Why does Namjoon look so... different?

Why is he so quiet, so… distant…It’s like he’s keeping himself away from me despite being right next to me, arm in arm, like the true Namjoon is somewhere in a glass case? Deep deep beneath whatever this creature is who is next to me?

I’m thinking too much. No. What is this? Why am I feeling this way?

It’s the music… no its not just the music… something is fucking wrong because all I feel like doing is breaking that glass case that’s locked away My Namjoon and presented this fucking imposter. What the hell is going on?!

Brishti barely managed to keep it together. She kept her eyes on stage…

It was like seeing a moving painting being created by invisible hands and the music was the sound of the brushstrokes, amplified. Park Jimin was playing Rothbart, the owl-like magician who curses Odette into a swan until she finds someone who would promise to love her forever. The questions in her mind and the power of the spectacle before her forced her tears to keep flowing.

Namjoon saw Brishti cry and held on to her. But the more he tried to comfort her, the more uneasy she became, the more she coudln’t contain the tears in her eyes.

The curtain fell at the end of Act three when the prince realises he has been tricked. Brishti, somehow, mirrored his grief. The prince was cheated by Rothbart into believing that his daughter, Odile, was Odette. Rothbart relished his plan so despicably it made Brishti’s stomach turn. The prince had already declared to the ballroom full of people his vow to love and marry the maiden by his side - Odile, not Odette. Park Jimin played Rothbart so skillfully, so beautifully that despite being the villain, despite being covered from head to toe, he was the star. Rothbart giggled delightfully as he revealed to the prince that the girl in his arms wasn’t Odette at all. That Odette was waiting for her prince by the lake. The curtain fell as the prince felt the stab of betrayal and rushed to Odette.

Brishti rushed to where she did not know. She wanted to get away from Namjoon, from this feeling that she couldn’t understand, couldn’t explain. She was angry. She wanted to break something. Tears still flowing down her face, she found a corner that was hidden away in darkness. She went in. Brishti sat on the couch there, for what seemed like eternity, breathing heavily. Nothing made sense. It felt like her insides were twisting into each other. Suddenly, though, a door creaked open and out came an angel. A man, glowing, having just freshened up. He saw her, saw her fear and instead of pulling back in shock, approached with a strange kindness. He held her wrist and stayed silent for a moment.

His beauty was also a kindness to her. In that moment, Brishti could breathe a little bit better. He sat down by her knees, on the floor and when he spoke, his voice flowed like a tonic, “First time at the ballet? It’s overwhelming… I know. You’re okay. You are safe. Rothbart is not here. Talk to me… what are you feeling?”

The tears kept flowing. This man was different, she knew he understood what she was feeling like. She felt safe, but not as if she was with a saviour, rather as though she was with another victim.

“What are you feeling…” Park Jimin repeated. The pieces were falling into place in her head. This is Park Jimin, the man who danced as Rothbart. The man who should have danced the Prince. Who should have played Odette and Odile.

“I feel… rage.” Brishti trembled as she spoke. She could breathe again.

“Yes… Rothbart is… evil… I’m sorry-”

Brishti nodded her head no. “At the prince.”

Jimin was surprised. “Let it out. You can scream in here and no one would know.”

Brishti didn’t need another invitation, but her rage wasn’t a scream, it was a whisper - “I want to hit the prince. How could he not now? He couldn’t see that that girl was not Odette? Is he blind? The way she moved, the way she danced… which only means… it means that the prince knew… somewhere he felt doubt but he… He couldn’t fucking trust himself enough?! I don’t know why this is breaking my heart… Why can’t people trust in themselves?! It’s a pathetic fucking excuse and I can’t buy it… I just can’t. Why did the prince...” Her hands covered her face as she wiped her tears. She composed herself.

Jimin pulled out a kerchief. “May I?” Brishti nodded and he dabbed her face with care.

“The prince trusted his sight more than his soul. And now, Odette will die because of it. As always, the woman pays the price.”

“He dies too, you know.”

“What a waste…”

Jimin smiled, “Thank you… for watching the show, for feeling it so much.”

Brishti managed a weak smile, “Thank you.” Jimin stepped away and sat next to her, at a respectable distance. “I’m being lied to.”

Jimin nodded, “I know what that’s like. I feel that rage against the prince too. And still, we must be kind to our liars.”

Brishti clenched her teeth, “Why? Where’s the fairness in that?”

Jimin moves away, in a dejected kind of daze and pours himself a drink, “That’s the biggest lie, fairness. Cruel joke.”

Brishti walked toward the door. “I should go… Thank you.”

Jimin raised his glass to her.

Brishti wore her coat and walked toward the exit. She found Namjoon in a panic and suddenly felt like she could reach him. He looked so relieved to see her. She couldn’t help but feel awash with love as he crashed into her in the warmest hug. It was as if he was the one who was lost.

“Are you okay? Why were you crying?” Namjoon asked her as he stroked her head and held her in the hug for as long as she needed.

“I need to ask you something.” Brishti whispered as she pulled away. They began walking down the stairs of the theatre.

“Änything.” Namjoon replied.

“Your firm… they refused the Jimin case, right?”

Namjoon froze. His jaw locked up. “Let’s go home.”

The rest of the way, neither of them spoke a word. They entered their home in a cold silence. They washed the night off themselves and entered their bedroom, which was completely devoid of the heat and desire that usually filled it right up to the ceiling. What used to feel like an ocean, now felt like a vacuum.

When Namjoon walked in, Brishti reminded him, as kindly as she could,“I said I need to ask you something. You said, ‘anything’.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to talk about it.” Namjoon was cold again. Unfeeling. Unreachable.

Brishti tried her best to be calm… “When would you want to talk about it?”

Namjoon breathed in - “Why? Am I answerable to you?”

“Yes.”

“Well, we disagree. I don’t think I am answerable to you. What would you have done if I wouldn’t have told you about it in the first place?”

“I would still be feeling what I’m feeling… I would be even more furious though.”

“Fu- why would you be furious? I have to work there, I lost the account. I’m feeling hurt and disappointed in myself and instead of helping me, you’re angry?! What the hell could you be angry at?!”

“I’m being lied to. I’m being tricked.”

“What?!” the contempt on Namjoon’s face made her head throb. He was angry now.

“There are two Namjoons here. I’m being told there’s only one and--”

“That is some philosophical trash that you learned from one of your books. Real life doesn’t work that way. But how would you know?! You don’t have a real job. You have a hobby. A hobby of stacking books in order. You’re just plain lucky that someone is paying you for your hobby. That’s not a job. You of all people cannot tell me about the things I have to do to keep my job. I have tried my best to be as honest as I can be--”

“As honest as you can --”

“Listen to me!” Namjoon thundered. His loud voice might as well have been a punch. It rang through her body and rattled her bones. She had tears in her eyes but clenched them down as Namjoon continued yelling, “Enough… enough with the fucking tears. What the fuck are you so sad about?! I don’t need you to pity me. I don’t need anyone to feel sad for me. I have tried to be a good man - do you even know how much other men don’t even mention to their wives?! I told you everything. EVERYTHING. And now I’m being punished for it. Time and time again I tried to console you… even though I was the one hurting… I tried to be there for you and tell you… as long as I have --”

Brishti couldn’t take it anymore “Don’t. Say that.” She didn’t yell. Her voice was just above a whisper and yet it sent a chill down Namjoon’s spine. She wiped her tears. “I didn’t ask to be consoled. I was just… curious. If a few questions from me hurt so much maybe you should ask yourself why. I’m not lucky that someone decided to pay me for my hobby. It’s nice to know what you really think of my job. But whatever you think, I created my job. I created my life. I fought to come to london. I fought for the right to earn--”

“Oh please... spare me the feminist lecture...” scoffed Namjoon.

“Sure. Take up Jimin’s case.”

Namjoon felt the burn of white hot rage. He wanted to strangle her. He was so used to touching her… and she was his… in this bedroom, he had made her his. He wasn’t thinking. Namjoon strode toward her and held one massive palm over her mouth and the other on her neck and pinned her to the wall. “YOU WOULDN’T HAVE KNOWN ABOUT THAT IF I DIDN’T TELL YOU.”

It took him a few moments to realise what he was doing. Brishti was shocked and tried to scream but no voice came out. She was trying to get him out of his daze when he finally saw her, saw his Rim, horrified… by him. Namjoon pulled his hands back instantly. He saw a red bruise bloom where his hands were - on her face and on her neck.

“This is how you make your conscience shut up?” Brishti’s voice was hoarse. “You think this has nothing to do with your conscience? With the best part of you? The part that you made me fall in love with? Are you really telling me you don’t know that this is why you can’t write the way you used to… You’re killing my Joon and asking me to stay silent. I can’t.”

The searing anger still hadn’t died and it burst out of him, “Why are we fighting like this… over Jimin… why don’t you take up his case if you fucking love him so much?”

“What do you think I’m doing right now?”

“You… Why are you fighting for him against me?!” It was here that Namjoon realised his armour was gone. The idea of who he is... suddenly vanished. And the one thing that had made him feel safe, like his true self, was slipping away. “You’re saying… just tell me… you’re saying what I think you’re saying.”

Brishti did him the only kindness she had left in her, she explained, “Jimin wants to leave but can’t. He stays because he needs to dance. He stays because he cannot get out of his contract. You say you want to help people like Jimin, you roll your eyes at white people who can’t pronounce our names, you feel guilty for asians who have much less than we do… but then you also don’t raise an issue when your boss holds meetings in clubs where people of other races and dogs and women are not allowed. You work overtime for the privilege of weekends… You say you are trying but… as far as I know… you don’t have a non-compete clause in your contract, Namjoon.”

That hit him like an iceberg. Namjoon’s legs gave way and he just sat on the bed.

He watched as Brishti put on her coat and left, covering her bruises with a scarf.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 6 - to be posted.

[demoneyesanddamagedsouls]

Sparring Partners

Chapter 1: Office Politics

A/N: Oh my goodness hi! This is chapter one of quite a few of my first ever fanfic starring my absolute favourite Pedro Pascal’s Agent Whiskey. I feel like I haven’t seen enough fics with him in it and I thought I better write one myself. Feedback and comments are so welcome, I’d love to hear your thoughts, and if you’d like to be tagged for the upcoming chapters just let me know! xxx

Pairing: Agent Whiskey x F! Reader

I have also just created a playlist for ya’ll to listen to while reading. I hope it gets you even more invested! ✨COCKY COWBOY PLAYLIST✨

Summary: You and Agent Whiskey are long time rivals. As Statesman agents you both have been put up for the same promotion and this mission is your final chance to prove yourself. Have you got what it takes?

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Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: Slight Language

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CHAPTER 1: Office Politics

You and Tequila circle each other in the ring, moving expertly as the new recruits looked on, watching your every move. Darting forward you catch him with a sharp jab under the ribs, startling him. He makes his move aiming a strong blow at your jaw, but you duck away with seconds to spare moving just out of his range. Tequila turns around and smiles at you gesturing with his hand for you to come closer. You lunge at him aiming another devastating blow to his stomach, but he knows your play. Sidestepping your punch, he grabs hold of your arm throwing you to the ground and completely winding you. Your eyes go fuzzy as you try to regain your strength. You have to think on your feet. As he’s smiling at the crowd of recruits all of them cheering him on, a grin spreads across your face.

Idiot.

Lightening quick you lift your torso and wrap your legs around Tequila’s shoulder and chest, pulling him to the ground with such momentum it takes all the breath out of his lungs and he wheezes. You quickly throw your legs over his stomach, straddling him and holding him down.

“Alright, alright Vodka! I yield!” He laughs as he realises, he’s been defeated. Again.

You lift off him and help him to his feet. “That’s why you never celebrate before you know you’ve won.” You say addressing the recruits. You heard some snickers from the back, no doubt at Tequila’s expense at his quite sudden defeat.

“Now after Tequila catches his breath…” You chuckle, “we’ll start running through some of the moves we just demonstrated. Its important to tackle different opponents to learn how…” You trail off as Champ enters the training facility.

“I see you are all enjoying your training” Says Champ, his voice a booming presence in the large room, “a little more than I expected.” He smiles over at you and Tequila, “Unfortunately I need to steal Vodka away from you for a short while.”

He nods over at Tequila. Tequila responds in kind, then turns to the recruits. “Alright everyone let’s split off into pairs and practice some of those moves.” You hear him say as you walk out of the room.

You walk down the hallway next to Champ towards the elevator. Stepping in Champ leans forward and pushes the top button. We were heading for the main conference room. As the elevator clunks to life, you slowly leave the basement level and emerge into the bright glow of the afternoon sun. The glass capsule of the elevator allowing a full view across the Statesman distillery, a place you had come to call your home after 8 amazing years of working as an agent. You reminisce as you look out across the large estate, thinking about how you first got here. You were a young runaway, freshly 18, out of luck and out of money. To make ends meet you had become a great pool hustler… and an excellent thief. You were light fingered, quick and if you ever got caught you knew how to defend yourself. However, one day you picked the wrong pocket.

***

Seeing an easy score as you passed through the local fete, an older gentleman decked out in a dashing suit with a matching black Stetson, his wallet practically hanging out of his jacket pocket. You purposefully shoulder past him knocking him lightly, using the opportunity to sneak your hand into his jacket, relieving him of his wallet. Apologising quickly, you continue along, mindful to keep your head down so as not to be spotted later when the gentleman finally realised what had happened. As you rounded the corner to move away from the large crowd you stumbled headfirst into a tall foreboding man in a white Stetson. What is it with the cowboy look in these parts? You thought to yourself.

Attempting to move past him you suddenly feel the grip of a hand on your shoulder. “Now hold on there little one. Just what do you think your doin’?” The stranger drawled as he kept a firm hold on you.

“Nothing,” you said keeping your eyes trained on him as you continued, “Just lookin’ for my parents is all.”

“And what’s that wallet in your hand got to do with finding your parents?” He questions, a small knowing smirk creeping across his face.

You feel panic start to rise through your chest as you realise you might not be able to get out of this, you’re boxed in and the man currently holding you is not someone you think you can beat in hand-to-hand combat. You needed to think on your feet. Standing next to him, resting all your weight on your feet you quickly sweep your right leg forward and then straight backwards, the full force of your body colliding into the back of his knees causing him to crumple onto the floor, releasing his grip on you. He reaches for your ankles, but you see his movements just in time to tumble out of the way. Back on your feet you dash down the path behind the fete tents in a desperate attempt to flee.

You smiled to yourself as you wove your way along, hidden from the hustle and bustle of the fete. You got away you thought as you turned around, only to see the stranger once more. Your face distorting in disbelief and then suddenly everything went black.

Never celebrate before you know you’ve won…

…

You woke to find yourself sat in a soft leather chair in an office lined with rich mahogany bookshelves filled to the brim with books. Swivelling around you find a large window looking out onto a spectacular evening sky, the sun just setting, lighting up the clouds with beautiful orange and purple hues. Shit. How long have I been out? What the fuck happened? You swivel round again to find the door to the office, realising you can hear voices behind it.

“Why on earth did you bring her back here Tequila?”

“I thought she’d make a fine recruit.” That voice you recognised, the stranger from the fete. “She managed to take me down swiftly with no training at all. Not to mention she managed to elude your notice when she grabbed your wallet straight out of your jacket.” You heard a chuckle. So, the other voice must be the gentleman you stole from.

“Well, I’m inclined to agree with you Tequila.” A third voice chimed in, “We’re always on the lookout for new talent and she definitely has potential.”

What on earth had you gotten yourself into?

The three gentlemen entered the office to find you staring directly at them, your fight or flight response kicking in. The panicked look on your face evident as your muscles tensed up.

“Woah, woah, there sweetheart, we’re not here to hurt you.” The older gentleman spoke, “In fact we’re here to offer you a job.” He smiles at you giving you a long hard look up and down, sizing you up.

You look back at the stranger who you now understood was named Tequila, the one who obviously brought you here. “There are better ways of doing that other than knocking a person out cold.” You shoot directly at him with a distasteful glare.

A loud chuckle erupted from the older man at your response. “That’s certainly true young lady.” Turning to address Tequila and the other man in the room, “You’re right she definitely has some fight in her.”

“Am I being held against my will? Or am I allowed to leave?” You shoot back, confusion still evident in your voice.

“Feel free to be on your way.” Grunted the man under the black Stetson, a bruised ego evidently still weighing on him. You smiled at the thought.

“You’re certainly able to leave if that’s what you’d like,” Said the older man giving him a hard stare, “No one will force you to stay. But I hope you’ll hear us out on that job offer I spoke of. I think its high time we introduced ourselves gentlemen. My names Champ, this is Agent Tequila,” Tequila dips his hat to you in response, “and this is Agent Whiskey.”

“Agent?” You responded, surprise registering on your face.

“Yes, Agent. This is Statesman, a secret independent intelligence agency.” Your mouth opens in shock as you listen to Champs explanation. “You’re currently sitting in my office in our Head Quarters in the fine state of Kentucky. And it seems that you may have what it takes to become an agent here if you’d be interested. It’ll take a lot of training and hard work but it’s a very rewarding path to take in life.” You brain running over everything Champ was saying at a 100 miles per hour. “So… what do you think? Are you interested in my offer?”

Purpose, that is what you had been searching for your whole life. Although, it seemed it had found you instead. “Absolutely.” You smiled, what had you got to lose?

***

“We’ve got a new op we need you on.” Champ says as you walk towards the conference room snapping you out of your thoughts. “We’ll run through the specifics when we get there. Now just remember that teamwork is vital here in Statesman and don’t you forget that…” You give Champ a quizzical look. As you open the doors you realise why, finding yourself face to face with the one man in Statesman who knew just how to get under your skin. Agent Whiskey. “Hey there sugar.”

Your confusion quickly changes to distaste as you stare up at the agent, a forced smile plastered across his lips under his black Stetson. His deep brown eyes smouldered with the same distaste you felt. Ever since your fateful first meeting he had disliked you, making sure to be nuisance to you whenever he was able. It’s not like you made it any better, you constantly made an effort to show him up whenever you were competing. Always reminding him of that day you first met especially in front of the other agents, a conversation which never failed to make Whiskey angry, a deep flush making its way across his cheeks, caused by anger or embarrassment you never knew. All you knew was that you loved to tease him and best him whenever you could. You both were professional when you needed to be, always putting the mission first, but your rivalry was always there.

“Hey there Whiskey,” You said through gritted teeth. “So… Champ what is this op that requires Whiskey and I’s expertise?” Directing your question to Champ with a quizzical brow, curious as to what type of mission would require the two of you specifically.

“Well, it seems we have a potential problem right here in our own backyard.” Champ starts as he gestures for the two of you to sit down. As the three of you take your seats, Champ at the head of the table, Whiskey and you across the table from each other, he continues. “We noticed that a few private hospitals and medical centres in the area have been bought up by a company that we had been keeping tabs on called CleanPlanet. They have been managing to stay out of the news, but the company has recently been responsible for some very dangerous drug trials which resulted in a large number of casualties.” He lets out an audibly frustrated sigh. “They have been paying people off and continuing to conduct these trials, and now they may just have the facilities to conduct them on a larger scale. I need the two of you to figure out what is going on, what they are testing at these facilities and what they are trying to achieve. You both have your own strengths that you bring to the table and I need both of you working different angles to get to the bottom of this mess.”

Champ turns to Whiskey, “I need you to infiltrate the higher ups of the company, find out who is running this operation and what they’re trying to accomplish. And Vodka,” He turns to you, “I need you to get a look into the hospitals, find out exactly what trials they’re running and what is happening to the patients of these tests. Make sure you both keep each other up to date on whats happening on your end so you both have all the information you need. Report back to me with any solid leads you have so we can figure out our next move. I need you both to work together on this one alright. So, remember to keep it civil.”

“Yes Champ.” You both say in unison.

“I’m glad to hear it.” He smiles, rolling his eyes. “I also need to tell you that I’ll be keeping a close eye on the both of you. I have thought long and hard about this and I plan on stepping down as the head of this organisation.” Shock registers on Whiskey’s and yours faces but Champ continues talking as if it was just another statement. “I’ve been working here and running this operation for most of my life and I’m gettin’ tired. I want to settle down with the misses on a nice ranch of my own to enjoy the time I have left with her, my kids, and my grandkids. Every minute of this job has been thrilling but I want to start stepping back and making time for my family. After much deliberation I believe one of the two of you would be the best fit for this position. So, consider this mission a final show of skills and strengths before I make my decision on who will be my replacement.”

Unable to wipe the surprise off your face you stutter, “T-Thank you for this opportunity Champ. Its an honour to be considered for this position… I won’t let you down.”

“Yes, thank you Champ it’s a real honour.” Whiskey says with a similar expression to yours evident on his face. For once he doesn’t exude the cocky energy he usually has.

Unfortunately, this doesn’t last long, as he turns to face you once more, a smirk forming on his lips. “Well then Vodka, it seems we have a challenge on our hands… May the best agent win.” You look deep into his eyes, a wicked glint behind them, his lips curled into a mischievous grin.

What an exciting challenge. I look forward to showing him who’s the boss. You think to yourself, an equally cheeky smile spreading across your face.

“Alright Whiskey… Let the games begin.”

*******************************************************

[ajaxwrites]

Genshin Impact Fanfic Rec List

(because this is my most current obsession~~)

The Narwhal of Dihua Marsh by GreyLiliy

Childe hears of a strong Adeptus living at the Wangshu Inn. Despite warnings from Zhongli that fighting Xiao would be a deathly mistake, Childe seeks out the Adeptus living in the Dihua Marsh eager for a proper fight.

However, Childe severely underestimates his opponent, and the consequences of his actions may keep him from returning home to Snezhnaya.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: This fic is interesting primarily because it's not necessarily what you would call an easy story to read. The content can surprisingly get quite heavy as the relationship between Childe and Zhongli isn't healthy and it becomes increasingly obvious as the story progresses. You swing between wanting to separate the two and also desperately wishing that they'll work out because there is something there. The story snowballs from what seems like an innocuous, if stupid and rash, decision on Childe's part to a complicated mess that you can’t help but be enthralled in. I went in expecting your typical romance and ended up in something that was more complex than I expected but also beautifully thought provoking.

Entirely Out of Spite by Bgtea

"Welcome to a new user experience! You have triggered this interface with the keywords, ‘Stupid game! Stupid devs! I want my f*****g money back!’ You are now bound to the character Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, codename: Childe! We hope you have an enjoyable user experience and we welcome you once again to Genshin Impact 2.0!”

Those are some of the first words Ajax, starving college student extraordinaire, has the misfortune of hearing upon waking up in a brave new world from what he's fairly sure is a very, very fatal accident involving water and a shit ton of electricity.

Okay, so he's not dead. That's good. But what's this about him being stuck playing the character Tartaglia? Tartaglia, as in the shitty, one-dimensional, cartoonish villain who met his untimely, gruesome death in the first act of the original game?

Fuck that noise. Like hell Ajax is going to share that fate.

And so begins one man's journey to unfuck himself.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Whenever this updates, I squeal. If you’re a fan of The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System or just transmigration/reincarnation plots in general, you’re going to love it. Bgtea does a beautiful job in balancing humor with the trauma that comes with the whole reincarnation plotline. The whole of it is beautiful written and watching Childe/Ajax interact with the other characters (and the perspective of those characters) is a delight! 

the sister by glassdrachma

The tragic and unexpected death of Zhongli-xiansheng of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor occurred to the sorrow of many and the deep skepticism of a few.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: glassdrachma has a gift for humor and romance. In short, Zhongli fakes his death for plot reasons and comes back as Jianlao, the bereaved twin sister. Shenanigans ensue, featuring overprotective Liyue-ians (?), chaotic gremlin Venti, and Kexing. Very light hearted, good for the soul.

The White Cicada Society by clementinesgulag

After his little brother is bundled back to Snezhnaya, Childe makes good on his promise to the traveller and takes the first boat out of Liyue Harbor. Any sense of homecoming lasts about as long as an uncooked steak in front of Xiangling, however, when his boat sinks, grounding him back in the mainland.

It's just as well, because the next morning, a body is found in the Northland Bank. A visit from a fellow Harbinger reveals a far more insidious plot than anything Childe could concoct with a god of the vortex and twenty minutes without supervision. The murders aren’t limited to the one Bank. They’ve been trailing down the Liyue border, getting closer and closer to the city. The Tsaritsa has a new mission for him: to figure out who, or what is targeting Fatui forces.

Against his best wishes, Childe is forced to see Zhongli again at the morgue. It becomes clear that he’s going to need a guide, and Childe resolves to quash his pride, and their differences to request his help to navigate Liyue and solve the case.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: A diamond in the rough that I slept on and then stumbled back to by accident. I had it marked for later on AO3 and forgot about it for like a good week to my utter self-disgust. It. Is. So. Damn. Good! The mystery is intriguing but I live for the realistic portrayal of the aftermath of the whole gnosis plotline. The betrayal, the bitterness, but ah, the sexual tension. The harbinger interactions in this fic make it gold though.

Lungs full of Roses by SecretlyACatLady

Childe had always assumed that he would die young. He had accepted that a long time ago, ever since he accepted the mantle of a Fatui Harbinger. However, he always thought that he would die in a glorious fight, his body broken but spirit relishing the strong opponent that had bested him. He was okay with that type of death.

Unfortunately, it seemed like Fate had decided to add one last insult to injury, because, here Childe was, dying because he had fallen in love with the ex-Geo Archon. The same Archon who seemed to have discarded him like an old toy ever since the Osial Incident. --- In which divine beings are cruel and a cursed Childe starts preparing for his inevitable death because no Archon could ever love a mortal.

…Right?

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: The fic that started it all for me, the one that sucked me into the fandom. This fic is heartbreaking. We always do love a hanahaki plotline but something about the way it frames the disease and the shame that comes with it...I highly recommend giving it a read. The angst is real I tell you.

The Bride of The Golden Dragon by Erika_Bee

“You’re to be sent on a special mission, Tartaglia.”

The young man’s eyes gleamed in interest. “How special?” He asked as he wiped the blood off his daggers.

His superior grinned. “Special enough to put your name in Snezhnaya’s history books.”

—

In which the Archon War ravaged the land of Liyue and to ensure the people’s survival, the God of Geo established the Harvester Contract: One bride per village, every year, in exchange for protection and a good harvest.

Or: Childe is sent on an undercover mission to kill the Geo Archon, but things don’t go as planned.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Don’t let the title scare you off--this isn’t one of those fics where they feminize one of the male characters and reduce their personality to a mindless submissive bobblehead to the point that I want to throw my laptop out of the window. Not that there’s anything wrong if you like that kind of thing, just not my cup of tea. This fic though---READ IT! There’s just something refreshing about the writing and the plot, the way that Childe’s character reads off the page. I live for the interactions between the characters and how the author has mapped the relationships. Warning that recent chapters have swerved decided into NSFW territory though.

the brothers grim by izabellwit

Left in an unfamiliar land with a mission he never wanted, a young Kaeya lies, survives, and somehow finds a family in the process.

Or: How Kaeya came to Dawn Winery, and why he left it. Includes lore, sibling bickering, found family struggles, and a more in-depth look at the years between Kaeya’s arrival and Crepus’s death.

Ships: N/A

Notes: Ahh, little Kaeya. Cheeky ass little shit that’s too angsty and adorable for his own good. I don’t have words for this fic. It makes my heart warm but also makes me want to weep because god, this fic covers exactly how traumatic Kaeya’s situation is and why child soldiers/spies just shouldn’t be. And the dynamic he has with Diluc and Crepus--do me a favor and read it. Screams found family.

the wind through the mountain tops by glassdrachma

Boredom brings Barbatos of Mondstadt to bother a certain ex-Archon of the Earth.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: A light-hearted, humorous and fluffy as hell piece. Short word is that Venti comes to Liyue for some fun, causes chaos, accidentally plays matchmaker, and steals some vegetables. A get-together fic for Childe and Zhongli that includes a surprisingly self-aware (if blunt and snarky) Zhongli and jealous Childe that gets increasingly flustered.

melt (speak or forever hold your peace) by anatakana

Falling into bed with Diluc was an unbelievably bad idea given their tumultuous shared history, but Kaeya’s impulsive urge to amuse himself knew no bounds.

It’s all fun and games until emotions got involved.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: THIS IS NSFW. With plot though? This is THE FIC that got me shipping the two (though the game did a good job on its own). The angst is real here and we love the sheer gal of both of these two stupid men.

Cascading (In a good way) by Hubbleablubble

Kaeya is a fascinating annoyance.

(Or: A series of events in which Albedo gets to know Kaeya, and they slowly go from strangers to acquaintances to something more.)

Ships: Albedo/Kaeya

Notes: Sweet fic. Not my typical ship pairing. Loved the Khaenri’ah mentions. Kaeya is Trans FTM here though it’s only briefly mentioned. There is also an incomplete sequel (as of May 2021) featuring an Overprotective Big Brother Diluc on a warpath giving shovel talks to everyone except apparently Albedo that’s also worth reading.

The Language of Flowers by Jules (Penwyn)

Kaeya Alberich has made a habit of lying—after all, the only truths he’s ever spoken cost him everything—but there are only so many lies a man can tell before the truth comes spilling out.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: Hanahaki! Except not! Basically, Kaeya pukes up flowers that say the truth whenever he lies. Cue, angst! Lovely and quick read--love Kaeya’s voice here.

i know i'm where i'm meant to go by paperclips (pastel_paperclips)

"Childe," Zhongli says suddenly. "I am enjoying myself greatly."

Childe’s face breaks into a grin. "Then-"

Zhongli gasps, grabbing his wrist and tugging him over to an unsuspecting peddler with a cart full of rocks. "Is that an intrusive igneous pegmatite formed in the Inazuma regions?"

Childe’s grin smooths into a small, adoring smile. He has all the time in the world to figure the other man out.

OR: Finding the Geo Archon is on Childe's to-do list but hanging out with Zhongli is significantly more fun.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Childe, you idiot. Humorous and funny, very light hearted. Makes you wonder if Childe has an IQ. He’s too busy pining/lovesick to realize that he told his target that he’s going to kill him for his gnosis. Zhongli and Liyue remain confused on how Childe still DOES NOT get it but half-ass hiding his Archon status anyway.

the bird without wings by Anonymous

"Kaeya!" someone yells. Small arms wrap around his waist tightly, red hair spilling out of the ponytail, and Kaeya's heart almost stops.

He's talked his way out of all types of situations. From placating international disputes to buttering up his informants, he's always had a quick response to everything.

But for once, Kaeya is speechless. He stares down at the boy with puffy cheeks, slightly crooked teeth and sparkling bright eyes.

Eight year old Diluc beams back.

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: Diluc gets de-aged and Kaeya gets angsty. The interactions between the two are heartwarming and will induce tears. Childe makes a brief appearence that *chef’s kiss*

call me "lover boy" by Anonymous

Zhongli turns back, eyes bright with amusement, a stray lilypad still stuck in his hair, and Childe thinks, wow. I want to kiss him stupid.

Childe's not into the whole "swooning maiden patiently waiting for his beloved to swoop down and smooch the daylights out of him" thing. Nah, that's not his style. He's Tartaglia, eleventh of the Fatui harbingers, and he's going to kiss Zhongli right now.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: FUNNY AS HELL. Childe is straight up just trying to plant one on Zhongli but fate and people just keep interfering. It’s a weird trope aversion where the character is actively trying to confess rather than avoiding it but life gets in the way. 

springtime in snezh-nya-ya by miaomaomei

Tartaglia’s body moves before he can even think about it. He arches his back and flattens his ears against his head, baring his teeth in a hiss. Considering he barely even reaches Scaramouche's knees — Scaramouche, of all people! The guy is practically the size of a fourteen-year-old — he doubts that he is cutting as imposing a figure as he hopes.

It isn't a surprise, though. No one could become a Fatui Harbinger if they were scared of a little cat.

OR

Tartaglia is turned into a cat and he goes to Zhongli for help. It goes about as well as expected.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: TOO ADORABLE FOR WORDS. This is just pure fluff I swear. Love how Childe is written and the interactions between the two are just ahhhh. A balm on the soul.

Melt by tanktrilby

“My name is Diluc,” he says. A scowl naturally furrows his brow, and Kaeya looks like he wants to laugh.

He’s looking at him through his lashes again, blue eyes teasing and warm. “Diluc,” he says. “A knight in overalls isn’t quite where I thought my preferences would lie, but here we are.”

(or: Kaeya loses his memories and makes some assumptions. Diluc can't honestly tell him that he's wrong.)

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

Notes: As the summary says, Kaeya loses his memories. Diluc plays babysitter for plot reasons. Meanwhile, Kaeya freaks out and has an essential crisis because his instincts freak him out which = angst. Simultaneously, sort of love confessions? 

you are cordially invited by ktenologious

When the Traveler receives a mysterious invitation from a Snezhnayan businessman, they seek out help from the only Snezhnayan they are on good terms with. They decide it is a wonderful idea to go to this business party in the middle of the ocean because, well, what could be better entertainment than watching a Fatui Harbinger at work? It is too bad Childe couldn't come with them...

Meanwhile, the Tsaritsa needs someone to track down the source of a brand new drug at a party on a cruise; it just so happens that she has two Harbingers who specialize in causing chaos and sinking ships. Scaramouche is a sadist and loves this, and Tartaglia... Well, Tartaglia just wants to know why is he the one in the dress again.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe, sort of Diluc/Kaeya & Scaramouche/Childe

Notes: Features a crossdressing Childe and Kaeya for plot reasons. Funny as hell. Love Fatui dynamics/interactions. Highly recommend. Go read it. I’m serious. It’s so beautiful, I can’t. Also Zhongli is so love-sick and jealous, it’s hilarious.

The Road to Snezhnaya by paranoid_fridge

Everything's done and over. Now, Zhongli only needs to adjust to living like an ordinary mortal. Or that is what he thinks until a familiar face shows up in Liyue. Teucer comes looking for his brother who failed to return to Snezhnaya on the Fatui ships. And as Childe's declared "friend", Zhongli must help Teucer find him.

Or: Teucer drags Zhongli on a cross-country goose chase looking for Childe. Zhongli just happens to find a bit more along the way.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: I have no words for this fic outside of the fact that it is clear that Teucer has the only functioning brain and should be Best Man because he obviously did all the work here. Features an oblivious Childe and overprotective Zhongli, plus bystander Kaeya that is getting allll of the gossip. And also the most destructive group of children ever.

basket of knives by oronine

“I just want to be loved,” Childe says to himself, to whoever is listening. “Is that too much to ask?”

They are on the roof once more, this time Childe’s foot touches the edge of the building as he daydreams of something that cannot be. The sky is blank and cloudy and perhaps Lumine fears it’ll all end when he takes a step.

“Not at all,” she says. It’s still the truth.

Contrary to popular belief, Childe hates his family but loves them all the same.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: TW for suicidal ideation, suicide attempt, self-harm, depression, etc. Not a light read by any definition. Set in a modern AU, not in the genshin impact universe. Features a Childe that is Not Okay, good friend but also probably traumatized friend Lumine (and her brother Aether), and Zhongli. Family dynamic is messed up as hell and explores mental health quite well in my opinion. I’m not sure how healthy necessarily Childe’s relationships are but I think that’s a given considering the context and how derailed his mental health is in this fic. Definitely angst as heavy, made me tear up quite a bit. Read, but pay attention to the content/trigger warnings as it does get quite explicit.

Bane of All Evil by tzitzimeme

When Chongyun unintentionally offends Liyue's second most powerful adepti, he vows to mend the thorny relationship between Adeptus Xiao and human exorcists-- even though no one has succeeded in currying Xiao's favor for over a thousand years.

His best friend Xingqiu offers to come alone, mainly because he's worried about what kind of trouble Chongyun will run into. Along the way, they receive help from others: Xiangling packs them meals for their journeys, while Zhongli gives them advice on what demons to track.

Childe is just there because he thinks the whole thing is hilarious.

Ships: Chongyun/Xinqiu

Notes: JFKLFJS I LOVE THIS. I love Chongyun’s characterization and the interaction between all the characters. The dynamic between Chongyun, Xingqiu, and Xiangling are to die for. Also, this line: “Stuck-up Persnickety Bastard.” Random note but Xiao throws Chongyun off a balcony yet is also 100% a softie.

Talks about Nothing by tzitzimeme

In which Zhongli unlocks the Memory of Dust, only to find out:

1. Guizhong is 100% alive (just disembodied) within it, 2. Guizhong has been watching over him this whole time, and 3. Guizhong is very excited by the prospect of Zhongli getting a cute Snezhnayan boyfriend.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe, Venti/Xiao

Notes: The pure judgment that Guizhong unleashes on Zhongli (as well as her sass in general) is pure comedic gold. The dynamic between Xiao and Venti are also adorable. Meanwhile, Childe misunderstands and also just wants to know what the fuck is going on.

xi wangmu by tzitzimeme

Xiangling scales entire mountains to satisfy the palettes of her two pickiest customers.

(Or, two men who are emotionally stunted by their own immortality inadvertantly turn an overly enthusiastic chef into their messenger pigeon.)

Ships: Zhongli/Xiao (?)

Notes: Not sure if it reads romantic exactly, can definitely be read as platonic. The fic boils down to Xiangling trying to expose Xiao to variety because just eating plain almond tofu is a no no. Zhongli gives advice/uses Xiangling as a messenger pigeon. Backstory is explored!

Falling (Fallen) by asinglecrow

It’s only when Childe finds himself in front of Zhongli, a spear protruding from his stomach, that he thinks oh I might have fucked up.

Or: The worst (best) day of Childe's life.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Funny and lighthearted! Gets sort of NSFW with passing mention of mpreg but otherwise, it’s just pure humor/fluff. Get-together fic featuring deadpan dragon Zhongli and Childe that is just done with everything. 

the louvre by morisuke

Here in Liyue, the air is filled with the ocean, and the sun shines through the mountains like it’s flowing through a crack in the sky. Here in Liyue, there is a man with no wallet at a vending machine that is going to waste the rest of his day showing a stranger around their school campus for a pocket sized can of iced coffee.

It’s interesting here in Liyue, Childe thinks.

or

Where Childe flirts with a stranger at a campus vending machine.

Ships: Zhongli/Childe

Notes: Set in a modern/college AU. This is a relatively quiet, soft kind of story. Childe comes to Liyue because reasons and falls in love quietly. It’s more of a snippet of life type of fic that’s sweet and peaceful. Love the change that comes over Childe as he finds a home.