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katerina-marie · 8 months ago

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The Tragedy of a Duality

Gojo Satoru x Female Reader and (Past) Ryomen Sukuna x Female Reader

Chp 1, Chp 2, Chp 3, Chp 4, Chp 5, Chp 6, Chp 7 (Final)

In the present, you are a sorcerer and the cherished wife of the Honored One. In an era long gone, remembered by only one, you were ordinarily human and the beloved bride of the King of Curses. How fitting it would be, in an evening of destruction, to have your heart torn in two.

Content: JJK Universe and Canon Events (tho tweaked to incorporate reader), Fluff, Angst, Flashbacks, Ambiguous ending, Violence, Death, Female reader but left descriptively vague, No use of y/n, True Form Sukuna in the past, Itadori Yuji is Sukuna's vessel in the present but nothing inappropriate b/n reader and Itadori as the vessel, Innuendos, Allusions to + Vaguely described sex so avoid accordingly. Will add more CW to each chapter if needed.

WC: 4.4k

A/N: A bit of a bridge chapter/transitive chapter, if you will.

Chapter 3

The distance between your village and the next largest market isn’t terribly far, but it still takes up a good portion of your morning on the best of days. When the sky begins to grey and thunder rumbles closer and closer, you know your trek is about to become even longer. The smell of wet earth and crisp air is always pleasant to you, but nothing about continuing a journey in robes that are heavy with moisture and cling uncomfortably to your skin sounds enjoyable, so you divert from the road onto a lesser traveled path.

Sanctuary from the rain under the cover of thick trees is your only option, so you wander and weave between them, cognizant of your general location but unaware of exactly where you might be. Droplets of rain occasionally splatter against your cheek as the sky opens up, and you can hear the droll of it against the foliage above you. Thankfully, you remain mostly dry, and you continue to walk slowly and hum to yourself while waiting for the weather to turn.

After a few minutes, you spot a bunching of trees that seem different from the rest, and upon closer inspection, excitement runs through you when you realize they bear fruit. You inspect the trail behind you and then side to side to ensure you are alone before hurrying over to one. It takes two or three attempts of you leaping from the tips of your toes before you are able to snag a pear from the lowest lying branch that is still almost beyond your reach. You rub it against your sleeve before taking a bite and relishing in the burst of sweetness on your tongue. You finish it rather quickly and are reaching for another when a voice from behind startles you.

“Do you have a habit of stealing fruit that doesn't belong to you?”

When you spin around, your face is contrite and your hands are held up innocently in front of your chest. You are ready to entreat the assumed owner of the land for forgiveness until your eyes fall onto who stands before you, and any logical words die in your throat. You immediately fold yourself into a bow and stare at the ground while you brace trembling hands on your thighs.

“I beg your forgiveness, my lord.”

Weeks ago, news of the being that usurped the ruling of the lands you live in reaches your small village. People whisper words of horror and fear about the monster that Ryomen Sukuna is. You know of his second pair of arms and the extra eyes that sit under the first ones. His size and strength set him apart from anything else, but it is his viciousness and ruthlessness that strikes terror in the hearts of anyone who goes near him. The description of him is something out of a nightmare, and the sight of him proves to you the truthfulness of what you hear.

“You may rise,” Sukuna tells you, but you are slow to stand back up, afraid to find out what happens to those who steal from the King of Curses. You keep your eyes downcast out of respect, but you can still see the white of his robes as he stalks toward you.

“Am I so repulsive that you cannot bear to look at me?”

You let out a squeak of alarm and fling your eyes upwards, and you aren’t sure what to make of the interest coloring his face.

“No, no,” you say placatingly, “that is not it all.” You pause before adding “my lord,” hastily.

Sukuna laughs, and it is deep and dark from somewhere in his chest. He prowls nearer to you, and you gulp in trepidation. While the image he makes is as intimidating and heart-stopping as you know him to be, there is something otherworldly and enticing about him. The white fabric of his robes are edged in blue and they split open across the great expanse of his chest. You follow the black tattoos from where they trail down his jaw, loop over his shoulder and then continue down his torso. They compete with the muscles of his chest to steal your attention.

“Tell me,” he muses, finally coming to a stop just an arms length away from you, “what brings you to my new estate?”

Your heart drops to your feet and you blanch. “Your estate?”

“The edge of it, to be exact, but yes—my estate.”

You contemplate whether making up some pitiful excuse could earn you mercy, but the thought of getting caught in a lie and the punishment that would follow has you choosing truthfulness.

“The r-rain,” you stammer. Sukuna looks at you expectantly, waiting for you to continue, and you step back in wariness. He pursues you, and his feet land in the place yours had just been. “I was on my way to the market in the town north of here when it began to rain.”

Your hands flit about in front of you before gesturing towards the sky, and you note curiously that while Sukuna’s main set of eyes follow the path of your hands, the ones lower trail over your figure before settling on your face.

“The trees would keep me dry while I waited for it to stop, but it seems I also felt a bit hungry,” you finish, and your arms flop ineloquently back against your sides.

In an effort to appear deferential, you quickly clasp your hands over one another in the front of your stomach and hope that Sukuna can’t see how tightly you clench the fabric of your robes between your fingers. He makes a noise in the back of his throat as he weighs your words, and you cast furtive glances over his shoulder or to your feet, anywhere that isn’t his eyes and the intensity of them. They are predatory in their observancy, and you would worry for your life if they did not trace the dip of your collarbones or linger at the curve of your bottom lip.

“How about you return with me?” he offers, and you jerk your gaze back to him. “You may wait out the rain in the comfort of my home and I will repay your company with a meal.”

No amount of critical thinking produces a plausible answer as to why Ryomen Sukuna is inviting you to his estate. You do consider your own mortality and how vulnerable it is in his presence, though you suspect that bringing you along to his home only to kill you would be excessive and unnecessary. In a similarly frightening, but shockingly alluring alternative, Sukuna could intend to make use of your company in a more salacious and carnal manner. Or it could be as simple as sharing food with one another and filling the time with conversation, maybe giving you the opportunity to deduce a possible explanation by the end. Either choice carries with it problems and difficulties to a varying degree, but the thrill of what is not yet known urges you to acquiesce.

To maintain some sense of propriety, you pretend to ponder his request just a little longer and let your focus flit about to the scenery around you, avoiding Sukuna entirely. From the way his eyebrow quirks upwards and his hands twitch at his sides, you suppose he has caught on to your teasing.

“I might find that agreeable,” you say, and that draws a sly smirk from him as his eyes flare wide. He moves toward you, but you hold up a hand to stop him. “However, I would like to request another pear before we leave.”

Sukuna doesn’t say anything, but he takes two large steps forward until his chest skims yours. You tip your chin up to keep a hold of his eyes as he stretches an arm above your head.

“Whatever you desire,” he croons, and when his hand appears again before your eyes, an unblemished green pear is trapped between his forefinger and thumb as he holds it out to you.

---

In the coming weeks, you are summoned back to Sukuna’s estate with some regularity after the first time he invited you in to ply you with food and drink while he peppered you with questions about your innocuous life.

A being appears at your door with white hair cut short and an odd strip of red around the back. You have to come to know them as Uraume, unsettling and uninviting in their demeanor, and they hurry you out each time with nothing more than a placid remark of, “it is Sukuna-sama’s request.”

This time, when the weather is a little warmer, you find yourself in the middle of an expansive garden. It stretches farther than your eyes can see, overflowing with abundance, and when Uraume vanishes after telling you Sukuna will arrive shortly, you take the time to study flowers and plants you are familiar with and wonder at the ones you are not.

“Why is it no surprise that I find you enamored by common weeds?”

Sukuna, as you have come to learn, makes no noise that alerts to his sudden appearances. His voice usually sends your heart racing and a gasp is ripped from your lips, though you gradually become used to the slight shift in energy that precedes him. As time passes, you might startle less and less, but until then, you give him an unimpressed look over your shoulder for the way he grins because he scared you, and for the mild insult.

“And why is it no surprise that you would think so lowly of them?” When he narrows his eyes at you, you smile coyly and bow your head just slightly. “My lord.”

Sukuna is by your side and offers a hand when you begin to rise from your knees. Once you are steadied, he crosses his arms and tucks them back into his sleeves.

“They are suitable decorations, I can admit, but that is the extent of which I appreciate them.” Sukuna lowers his head to peer into your eyes, and there is something playful and teasing lurking in them. “My interests lie in other more…invigorating pursuits.”

You cut your gaze from him, shifting a little to be back in reach of the flowers, anything to escape the underlying insinuation of his words and the way they make you flush hot. The sun is also warm on your back, and it is anyone’s best guess as to which is responsible for the way a bead of sweat drips down your neck.

“I acknowledge your opinion, but I do not happen to share it,” you tell him. You turn your back to him completely to brush your hand over a bush of varying colors. “Some of these are medicinal. Others have a pleasant fragrance that I tend to enjoy.”

You pause and pluck a particular flower from the bunch before facing Sukuna again. “And others simply serve no other purpose than being a beautiful sight to behold.” You lift your hand in front of his face, and cradled in your palm is a blossom the same shade of pink as his hair.

It delights you to see the way he fights a grin, and in a move that you do not perceive as normally characteristic of him, Sukuna plucks the flower from your fingers and slots it delicately behind your ear. His hand lingers to dance over the apple of your cheek, and when his thumb catches on your bottom lip, you bat your lashes at him coquettishly.

It is a powerful look you have discovered. The last time you pulled it from your arsenal, you had nipped a piece of fruit from Sukuna’s proffered fingers and let your teeth scratch over the joint of his knuckle. He kissed you breathless there after, and you yearn for it again now.

It seems to be successful. Sukuna’s hands cup your jaw and tilt your head up. A second pair of arms wind around your waist to drag you against his chest, and your eyelids flutter closed on their own accord when you feel his breath whisper over your lips.

“Tempting,” he says, and a chuckle comes next. Your eyes snap back open, and he taps your mouth when it turns down into a pout. “Worry not, I have a proposition for you.”

Your expression switches into one of inquisitive interest, and while waiting for Sukuna to continue, you twine your hands into the belt that keeps his robes tied shut.

“Wed yourself to me.”

---

Two pairs of elaborately decorated ceremonial robes lie discarded on the floor. The storm clouds outside darken Sukuna’s bed chambers and you can hear errant drops of rain hit the ground. Your belly is still full from the celebratory feast that took place after your wedding, but now a deeper satiation makes your body languid and warm.

You twine your arms under the pillow that cushions your head and stretch lazily against the bed. Your back is exposed to the cool air and it pricks at the drying sweat on your skin. Exhaustion is lowering your eyelids and sleep is beckoning. Before you get there, the side of the bed dips.

“Did you miss me while I was gone?” Sukuna murmurs, though it is playful and unserious. “I have returned to you now.”

A damp linen cloth drags over your lower back and legs before you can answer. You shiver at the chill it leaves, but the warmth of Sukuna’s hand follows behind to chase it away. The gentleness of it is a stark contrast to just earlier when you were under Sukuna and at his mercy to how his hands squeezed, and grasped, and kneaded your body.

A breath of laughter escapes your nose. “How can I miss you when you were only gone for a moment?”

Sukuna’s hands freeze and he grunts. “Cantankerous wife,” he mutters. But you smile into the pillow at the affection in his voice, and when he resumes his ministrations on your body, you let the feeling of his hands and the pattering of rain lull you into sleep.

---------------------------------

Four days pass before you see Itadori Yuji again.

Much like the afternoon following the incident, you spend the rest of the week proctoring the training of Fushiguro and Kugisaki while Satoru keeps Itadori hidden away for whatever it is that he and Nanami have him doing. You hear bits and pieces from your two students about how Itadori seems to be faring well despite the circumstances, and that the three of them are getting along just fine.

The scant details are enough to keep your worry mostly abated, and in the spirit of the approaching weekend, you release them from their training a couple hours early. Kugisaki is effusive in her rambles, and you barely catch whatever plans she describes as she hurries off. Fushiguro is much less excitable in his expression of gratitude and departs with a simple bow of his head. Their opposing personalities warm your chest with affection and leave you with a tranquil lightness as you head back to your shared office with Satoru (his insistence) to catch up on reports while you wait for him to finish his day’s work.

Through the window at your back, the setting sun casts looming shadows into the room, and you have to shake yourself awake as you feel your eyes grow heavy. There is a knock at the door that breaks your concentration from the computer screen in front of you. When you look up, Itadori is standing ramrod straight in the doorway. His shoulders are tense and his eyes are wide, but the expression on his face is friendly.

“Hello, Itadori,” you say as you lean back in the chair situated at your desk, and he waves at you. “Is everything okay?”

“Yup, everything’s fine.” Except Itadori’s voice is strained and he makes no move to step into your office, nor turn back to walk down the hall. Instead, he rocks on the balls of his feet and shoves his hands into his pockets. You purse your lips and fold your arms across your chest as you watch him expectantly. Itadori blinks back at you.

“Is there something I can help you with?” you prompt him. Itadori shakes his head, leaving you at a loss, but this time he walks forward and sweeps his eyes across your office. He shuffles to the towering shelves on the right wall and looks closely at a couple books before meandering across the room to pick up various knick knacks you have sitting on a hutch. Your eyes follow him the entire time, and you notice how he quickly moves his focus away from various photographs of you and Satoru over the years that you have pasted on a corkboard hanging on the wall.

With a sudden spin and jerky movements, Itadori finally comes to sit in the—in your opinion—unsightly black sofa that Satoru placed in the middle of the office and just a few feet in front of your desk so he would have something to nap on when he felt the urge. From it, all Itadori does is look at you. You glance at your computer, unsure what to do, and when the silence starts to feel awkward, you tap your nail against your thumb as you rack your brain for what to say.

“Are you sure there isn’t anything I can help you with?” you ask. “Or if you’re not comfortable sharing with me, I’m happy to call Nanami or Satoru for you.” You’re already reaching for your phone where it sits next to you on your desk when Itadori blurts out a hasty “no!”

Your hand freezes, and when you look back up at Itadori, he’s rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, and his knee bounces rapidly. “So, how did you and Gojo-sensei meet?”

The question catches you off guard, and you stammer as Itadori awaits your answer. It crosses your mind that the boy might simply be lonely and looking for some company now that the school day is over, but it’s nearing evening on a Friday, and you expect him to be finding a way to celebrate the incoming weekend. Just to be certain, you raise your brows in question, and even though Itadori grimaces briefly like he wishes he could take back his request, he nods at you in encouragement.

“Uh, well,” you start, blowing out a breath and clasping your hands together. “He and I were once students at the school here together…”

It’s not as if you haven’t heard about “the Honored One” before. You’d be hard pressed to believe that anyone in the jujutsu world could have existed presently without knowing of the infamous white-haired sorcerer. Of course you know of his talent, how he is considered the strongest, and you suppose such a title would allow for the level of arrogance he is known to carry. More so, you’ve been subjected enough to the whispered giggles and gossip from the other girls in your school to know that Gojo is—objectively, of course—as attractive as he is powerful, though you didn’t view that bit of information as anything pertinent.

When Geto Suguru spends two months at your school that was hours and hours away from his for some assignment, you find yourself paired up with him and thus privy to the details of his life as the two of you spend time getting to know one another. You resist asking him about Gojo Satoru in an effort to preserve your dignity, but curiosity gets the best of you, and you give in just a couple of days into the partnership. To your utter shock, as the two of you are walking back to the dorms after a training session, the first thing to pop out of Geto’s mouth about his best friend is to call him a “monumental pain in my ass—affectionately, of course.”

The words come out warmly, but they cause your jaw to drop nonetheless. Geto laughs and proceeds to tell you everything about Gojo Satoru that you have never hoped to know. He’s goofy and surprisingly awkward at times. His constant craving for sweets is borderline child-like and more akin to an addiction than a simple preference. He sometimes uses too many Digimon references in a sentence, and even Geto can’t always figure out what he means.

When the laughter dies down and the two of you stop at the doors of the dormitory, Geto’s face goes somber and his smile is weak. “Satoru can be a lot, but…he is the biggest burden to himself, and I wish it didn’t have to be that way.”

Now, half a year later, when circumstances move you to the Tokyo school, Geto Suguru looks mildly embarrassed as he walks you through the gates of the campus. The high bones of his cheeks are mottled red, though that could be explained away by the bitterness of the winter winds, but the hand that’s not carrying one of your duffle bags squeezes at the back of his neck as he chuckles nervously. You drag a suitcase behind you, another bag slung over your shoulder, and you’re grateful that Geto was willing to greet you outside the school to help you get settled in.

“I know I already kind of warned you about him, but I promise he’s actually harmless, if not a bit overly playful.”

“Trust me,” you say amusedly, “I remember what you told me about Gojo Satoru.”

“Yeah, well,” Geto mutters, “it’s a whole other thing to hear about Satoru versus actually experiencing him in person for yourself.”

You roll your eyes and are momentarily perplexed about how lovingly Geto disparages his best friend, but before you can question him about it, someone enthusiastically calls his name from across the grass, and the both of you look ahead in the direction it came from. Gojo Satoru waves erratically before breaking into a jog, and Geto turns back to you with a pointed widening of his eyes.

You ignore him in favor of watching Gojo eat up the ground with those long legs of his, and all those details come flooding back, even the ones you didn’t care to focus on. The blue of his eyes are breathtaking and unnaturally so. His height makes him lanky, and you figure that time will fill out the rest of his stature, but it doesn’t take away from the charmingness of his boyish grin and the fact that the girls at school are right; he is handsome.

“Suguru!” he exclaims in a greeting once he comes to a stop in front of you two, and Geto nods at his friend. He turns to you next, looking down at you over the rims of his darkened sunglasses, and the smirk on his lips gives you butterflies. And, maybe, you’re a little awestruck because he really is pretty and those eyes of his are unnerving, but you don’t particularly care and—

And then Gojo Satoru opens his mouth and the bubble bursts.

“Ha! He said that?!” Itadori crows, and he throws his head back in unabashed laughter and grasps at his chest.

You giggle along with him. “He certainly did, but luckily,” and you pause to lift your left hand and wiggle your ring finger so the metal on it gleams, “things worked out just fine.”

Slowly, both of your laughter disappears and you each look in different directions around the room to fill the silence. The clock next to your door says it’s nearly seven, and the grumbling in your stomach has you considering leaving Satoru to fend for himself in favor of finding yourself a meal. However, Itadori doesn’t make a move to get up, so you let go of your hopes for takeout and shake your computer awake with your mouse before typing away again at your nearly complete report. You’re happy to let the boy sit in companionable quiet if that’s what he needs.

“That was a nice story,” Itadori says a few minutes later, and you are so intently focused on your work that you’re startled into remembering that he is there. “Thank you for telling it to me.”

His hands slap against his knees and he springs up from the sofa, and you’re stunned by his abrupt departure. He’s nearly out the door when you finally find your tongue, and the firm way you say his name has him stopping in his tracks. You wait to see if he would respond, but when he doesn’t, you repeat his name a bit more gently this time.

“What is it?” you coax, and when he turns, his facade of unbotheredness falls, and his face is tired in its place. The sight breaks your heart a little.

“I don’t mean to waste your time,” he says regrettably and wrings his hands together. You shake your head to reassure him as his shoulders fall dejectedly. “He wanted to see you, is all.”

The meaning of his words don’t strike you right away, and Itadori raises a hand to tap at his temple. Understanding hits you like a truck when you realize he’s referring to Sukuna, and your mouth falls open.

“Sukuna was really adamant about it for the last couple hours. He’s finally quiet now,” he adds, “so I guess…”

Itadori trails off with a nonchalant shrug, and you find it entirely too casual for what he just said, but he seems unrattled by the request from the being inside of him.

“Oh,” you breathe out, stupefied and way too tired to formulate a sensible response or thought. “Well, uh…okay?”

The laugh that makes its way out of your mouth is a touch disbelieving and maybe a little unhinged, but it pulls a bigger smile out of Itadori, and he uses a hand to gesture vaguely over his shoulder as he begins to take a couple steps backwards towards the door.

“I’m going to go find Fushiguro and Kugisaki,” he tells you. “I’ll see you and Gojo-sensei next week!”

Now that you can see the tension has left his body and he appears lighter in mind and spirit, you’re content to return Itadori’s wave of goodbye as he hurries out the door. Once you hear his footsteps fade down the hall, you slump back in your chair and throw an arm over your eyes.

The King of Curses had wanted to see you, even if only through the eyes of his vessel, so much so that it seems he was willing to pester him into doing his bidding until Itdaori finally relented.

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A/N: Chapter count got upped by one, but it should still all come out in a timely manner. We'll get a part 2 to the Reader/Gojo flashback in the next chapter :)

Taglist (open): @kalopsia-flaneur

#gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x reader #ryomen sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jujustu kaisen

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2af-afterdark · 10 months ago

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HIIIII 👋 So, I read your WHB omega mc being pregnant and I've been trying to find more omegaverse WHB hcs and I want to ask if you could possibly make more hcs of that Au? Feel free to write what you want cause in the end I will surely eat it all up 💝 And I also like your writing. Thank youuu

I mean... If you want my honest whb Omegaverse thoughts, they are slightly different than that pregnancy ask. But I'm one of those people who can hold multiple headcanons in my head at one time. Uhhh, my genuine thoughts are closer to:

Only humans have second genders. Devils are closer to beats or monsters and angels are more similar to eldritch horrors.

Yes, human pheromones can set off devils. Like I said, devils are closer to beasts or monsters. It doesn't work quite the same as it would with a fellow 'second gender" human, but it can still rile them up.

This also means that devils go into heats and ruts just like alphas and omegas. Human pheromones can set off a devil's instincts, but a devil's pheromones cannot do the same. In other words: A human heat can send a devil into rut, a devil heat would not make a human go into rut. However, a horny devil asking to be fucked may still do the trick, it just isn't the pheromones at work.

MC is obviously up to the reader as every MC is different. Omega MC pheromones would makes devils go "mate??" while alpha MC would make devils go "competition!" and that changes the dynamics.

Minheyok gives beta energy (sorry my dude). But, if you are an angst enjoyer like me, that works just fine. No matter what, he gets this overwhelming feeling of loving MC, but their genders are not social compatible in the way he wants.

Solomon was definitely an alpha. Those devils saw competition and the competition won until they were basically kittens against him. God also fell for it.

Angels are largely unaffected by human pheromones. They can think humans smell sweet or spicy or nutty or whatever, but pheromones are just another scent to them. Nothing special.

Having said that, I do think MC would be an exception since they are the legacy of Solomon and God played favorites. God gave everything to Solomon, after all. I bet the angels called Solomon stinky. lol

LUCIFER IS A WHOLE OTHER MESS! Man went from alien thinking and expressions of affection to mostly bestial instincts. The first time he felt territorial was Paradise Lost, then his nobles, and so on. Since he's been another race though, he is more easily able to control himself than the other devils.

I am probably missing something, but that's what I could think of at the moment. Does that make sense? Any other questions or asks? Sorry, I love omegaverse. It's one of my comfort genres. I'm just weird about it.

#❖ eliciana #love letters ❤️#talkin' whb #cw omegaverse

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burritoreviewsstuff · 2 years ago

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Okay I finally finished Good Omens 2 (S2) and here is what I think of it

So Let’s Talk about Good Omens 2

First off, I have to give a round of applause to you Tumblr. There’s no doubt in my mind S2 was inspired by this site’s carnal desire for angst and that our local cryptid, Neil took that into consideration when writing S2. So for all of the people broken and depressed over the ending, the only people you have to blame is yourselves.

Neil served what the fans wanted, what this site wanted. What you wanted.

Am I upset with how it played out? No…but the journey to the big reveal at the end had its highs and lows. The main thing that I didn’t like is that they saved all the answers for the final episode, and I do mean ALL the answers to the questions that came up in episode one. Although, the plot twists were good.

Anything unexpected that came out of the plot was just…good. I’m not going to list them all here to prevent spoilers, but the unexpected was never a letdown. Any unexpected joke made me laugh my ass off.

Like, who the hell was gonna expect Jon Hamm to just wiggle his butt like a lost puppy at the camera? The answer is no one.

I just noticed the gigantic fucking clue to the plot twist was that when Jim first met Crowley he was wearing that blanket like he did in the statue.

And it wasn’t until the end with Nina and Maggie that they were supposed to be a parallel to Az and Crowley that we will ‘wait and see’ what happens and that ‘no one should play a hand on how they live their lives’. The same could be said for what happened to Job. His entire life was ruined over a bet between God and Satan.

The low points of the series I definitely thought were the excessive human cast who kind of…were there? We really didn’t need to spend as much time on them as we did. Disclaimer: no I’m not saying this as an anti-LGBTQA+ statement, I’m saying this as a perspective from the plot. And that ‘seamstress’ joke was just…it wasn’t funny.

Overall, episodes 2-5.5 felt like filler and only episodes 1, the second half of 5, and 6 felt like it was building structure to the plot. Everything else in between was mostly filler. Nothing wrong with it, but when a lot of nothing goes on that doesn’t really add up to some threads being tied together is quite bland and boring when a manhunt for the Archangel Gabriel is how you begin the premise for the season. The Nazi Zombies? Never come up again and are still alive roaming the Earth for all we know.

But hey, any moment where Jon Hamm was doing absolutely nothing and being funny was an absolute delight.

I AM DISAPPOINTED BECAUSE I WAS NOT QUENCHED IN THE GABRIEL STRIPPING SCENE YOU MAKE ME ANGRY NEIL! (I’m kidding although…if there’s an deleted scene…can you like…share? 👀👀👀 Once the strike’s over of course) Let’s be real if they showed Jon Hamm stripping the show would turn into ‘Good Gabriels’.

I busted out laughing because I AM ASSUMING IT WAS A COINCIDENCE THAT HE ALSO HAD THE KEN FUR COAT YOU KNOW THE ONE

Like no one is talking about this and it makes me sad

I also want to figure out what the significance of Muriel having The Crow Road by Iain Banks at the end of the series and what it is supposed to represent.

I hope Shax gets some more development.

And Aziraphale and Crowley? I’m already calling it now because my deductions are never wrong, but by the end of it all they will ineffably out on Alpha Centauri enjoying each other’s company. Alpha Centauri has been referenced too many times to not be a staple plot point.

The ending didn’t really feel like an end. It was more of an intermission or Third Act Breakup.

So when Good Omens 3 comes up with the Rapture and Second Coming I really hope they just call this man up to play Jesus.

It would be hilarious that we expect Jesus to be this humbled carpenter who is all wise from Nazareth but after years upon years he just became some chill broski from Florida.

Overall, it was an enjoyable fun time. Upon giving out my thoughts, it’s ineffable that this is Part 1 of 2 seasons (at least). More than likely S3 was in the works, but the strike happened and put everything on hold. For now.

#good omens 2 #spoilers

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rollercoasterwords · 3 years ago

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on my knees BEGGING for dorlene ff recs cause ever since i’ve caught up on thtf i’ve been craving a fix

ngl i am also on my knees begging 🤧 i have not yet found like a longer multi ch dorlene fic that i personally vibe with so if anyone has recs please send them my way!! in the meantime here are my favorite dorlene single ch fics/oneshots

Hey Dorcas by moonymoment on ao3 (@blurryayse)

14k words, beautifully written friends to lovers fic that follows marlene + dorcas at hogwarts slowly growing together and falling in love. v sweet and good if you want a happy ending!!

let the ghosts sleep tonight by outlaw_baby on ao3 (if anyone happens to know whether they have a tumblr pls lmk so i can tag them!)

7k words, gut-wrenchingly poetic fic about dorcas and marlene getting together during the first wizarding war. rewired my brain chemistry but super heavy on the angst

As The Light Disperses by blanketed_in_stars on ao3 (@blanketed-in-stars)

4k words, following dorcas and marlene's relationship during the first wizarding war. also beautifully written, also very heavy on the angst

marlene mckinnon is not a coward. by AllThisAndLoveTooWillRuinUs on ao3 (@wishingitwerewolfstar)

6k words, also following marlene and dorcas during the first wizarding war so there is once again plenty of angst but this one has a slightly happier ending 💕

sweet as rot by vaindumbass on ao3 (again, if anyone happens to know their tumblr pls lmk!!)

7.3k words, au where dorcas and marlene are the ones to kill peter and go to azkaban instead of sirius. super super heavy angst but i love the writing it cracked me like an egg and scrambled me in a pan

'81 by an anonymous ao3 user

4.7k words, au where marlene survived the war but everything else stayed the same, so it's not dorlene so much as marlene figuring out how to move on after dorcas's death which...yeah heavy angst once again lol (but beautifully written, of course 💕)

#i am an angst enjoyer first and a human being second #this is my cross to bear #fanfic recs #dorlene #fic recs #ask

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hella1975 · 3 years ago

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heyyy hellaa, please tell us your favorite fics of all time, from any fandom, because i wanna know what makes your brain go vroom !!

WOULD LOVE TO OKAY:

haikyuu:

three sheets to the wind by fairycake - we have sakuatsu we have found family we have pirates we have a surprisingly coherent balance of plot and fun times we have a prank war we have miya twins content we have idiotic background sunaosa we have PIRATES there is literally nothing to dislike here when i read the description of this fic i thought it would just be dumbassery but it wound up being so much more and i got so attached so quickly and the ending was just so heartfelt if i could read this again for the first time i would

burden of blame by deathbelle - OUGH the writing of this one is just. jesus christ. atsumu's characterisation? kiyoomi's characterisation? protective miya twins? the miya twins interactions themselves? if you took away the yakuza angle id be CONVINCED this was all canon bc the author just Gets the characters. maybe my fav sakuatsu fic ever

the courtship ritual of the hercules beetle by kittebasu - iwaoi have entered the chat!!! one thing about me is i LOVE a good recurring metaphor, but a super niche one when you can tell the author knows their shit? respectfully i am drooling. this fic is just so raw and real and it really hit home for me and even to this day when i see it im all !!!!!! a must-read for anyone in the haikyuu fandom

jaywalkers by batman - multi-ship but im gonna say it was more gen for me than anything idk if that's just bc none of my big ships were in there (aside bokuaka <3) or if i just latched onto the gen aspects but yeah u really dont need to ship any of the couples in this to absolutely be blown away by this. like holy fucking shit. this is my last haikyuu rec but it is also my first and quite possibly my favourite fic of all time. if you read anything from this whole list, read jaywalkers. i have never had a fic impact me the way this did and ive never come back to a fic so many times as i have this one bc im very much one of those people that once ive read something i dont get much enjoyment from rereading it no matter how much i like it. but idk something about jaywalkers has me in a complete fucking chokehold and has done since i read it over a year ago. the way this author writes is just so effortlessly human? like it's funny and realistic and messy and in-character and BECAUSE it's got so much dumbassery it really hits you out of nowhere when the deeper shit comes in, but it still works perfectly. ive never seen a writer so perfectly capture humanity before. whenever im struggling to flesh characters out, i return to this work and see all the effortless ways this author does that, whether it be through kei's headphones or kuroo's hair or oikawa's chameleon or every tiny tiny detail that is important enough to warrant a mention bc it's what makes these characters real. im just. god. yeah. also the final author's notes actually made me tear up

jujutsu kaisen:

found in translation by hiraethia - kai kai kai kai. GOD all of kai's fics absolutely gut me but this one just really stuck with me. kai's got such a specific writing style where she just makes really poignant and beautiful metaphors flow very easily, so it's never jarringly deep until you actually take a second to think about what you just read and you're like what the fuck and then it very much IS that deep, and that means kai gets a perfect balance of fluff and fun as well as just heart-wrenching tear your hair out kind of angst, which ofc works perfectly for satosugu

two drifters, off to see the world by quietkids - you have to have a pretty strong stomach when it comes to angst if you're gonna ship satosugu and id say i qualify for that and i also very very very rarely cry over fics, but my god something about this fic just destroyed me. im too scared to read it again. i cannot even comprehend how devastated i was upon finishing this like it wasn't even the gross loud sobbing kind of devastated it was just this awful ache that followed me around for DAYS and that takes so so so much talent any and all kudos go to this author. the thing about college-era satosugu fics that anhialates me so much is the helplessness of it. it's all so tragic and 'there is no other version of this story'. you watch them try so hard to make it work and every time without fail you know it all goes wrong anyway, the love was there but it wasn't enough. and somehow this author just grabbed that sentiment and put it into words and i just. OW

at the end of the world by freckledgeto - hi two of the bestest jjk writers are my mutuals and im bragging about it. alia wrote the itafushi (+first year trio friendship) roadtrip au specifically to hurt me im sure of it. not to get into the incredible writing parallels of jjk, but just like their predecessors, itafushi is all about that helplessness, the knowledge of how this is going to end and still trying to fight it, but while satosugu is usually very deep and dark and heavy, itafushi are the younger, fresher version, and alia writes to accommodate that so seamlessly. it's fun and silly and they're so clearly KIDS in it, and it makes it all the more heartbreaking when it stops being so fun and silly. specifically itadori's character is done beautifully in this fic, but also megumi's characterisation gave me an entire new angle on him that id never had before. the whole thing makes me want to punch a wall

atla:

where the stars do not take sides by witchofendor - honestly any fic by this author is always so well-thought out like the worldbuilding is always INCREDIBLE, but i just lovedddd this fire siblings in this and just the whole concept of it. this is my canon. i actually really want to reread this fic when i get a chance

blue by blacklipscurse - this will always always be THE zukka fic in my opinion like just JKSHGKJSHDGJH i miss when this was updating. the zuko characterisation in this is beautiful zuko and iroh's relationship is beautiful but also one thing that really stuck with me from this fic is the fire nation girls' characterisation? like ive NEVER seen a fic get azula like this but also TY LEE really stuck out to me. like she WOULD be so terrifying with her cheerfulness while she literally attacked you and this is the first time i actually felt that

feels like we only go backwards by oldpotatoe - RUBY WE MISS YOU <3 the writing of this fic is absolutely exceptional like there's a reason this fic gets so much hype. the angst? the romance? the slowburn? the falling in love twice over? the sokka and katara moments? give it to me straight into my veins pls

ozymandias king of kings by think_of_a_wonderful_thought - the first zukka fic i ever read and it's really stuck with me. ive said before but this fic really inspired me and is the reason a lot of taob is the way that it is. i LOVE zuko's characterisation in this bc he's different to canon but in a way that makes perfect sense with the divergence we're given. i also really liked hakoda in this? like not that he was being mean to zuko but just that the author wasnt scared to make him a good leader in a REALISTIC way, aka very cynical towards a fire nation prince. you'd think it would be obvious but people get very aggy when you're mean to zuko lol

salvage by muffinlance - obligatory mention <3 beloved fic <3 what to say about salvage that hasn't been said before. it's just an absolute staple of the atla fandom and CREATED its own trope that i very much capitalised off. i just think the whole concept is so so brilliant and it's such a heartfelt fic. it'll always have a very special place in my heart

#missing so many fics that i love in order to make this pretty short but oh well #i read in other fandoms but it's just these three that seem to churn out the real chokehold fics #i also avoided one-shots for this list #here u go <3 #ask #fic recs #haikyuu #jjk #atla

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lilac-5ky · 3 years ago

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As cliche as it may sound can i get a headcanon or imagine for Takasugi-kun who's strolling in the streets of edo accidentally bumps into the supposed to be dead reader (he saw her died at joui war) and she don't have any memories of him :) how will he react when he saw his lover again?

A/N: I could literally write a book with just this storyline lmfao there is something very appealing about heartbreak ;-; Funnily enough this turned out to be like a belated birthday gift to you since it took me a million years to finish, but hey happy birthday :p

Warning: This is obviously angst. Mentions of blood, depression, alcohol and smoking are included. Oh and, not really a warning but, THIS IS VERY VERY VERY LONG. Longest request I've written.

Takasugi with a presumably dead S/O reappearing in his life

Throughout the history of mankind, it's been evident that humans enjoyed observing the things around them. From studying the nature in the form of bird or flower watching, to spending hours upon hours of watching programs in their little black boxes; everyone had their vice. Takasugi was no different. Perhaps more so than others, one of the things he enjoyed the most was people watching.

There’s so much you can discover about a person just by studying them in their natural environment. How they talk, how they walk, their gestures, their laughter, all those little things reveal a great deal of information. A man who walks with his hands behind his back tends to be secretive, whereas a girl who points her shoes at the one she’s discussing with is most likely interested in them.

Takasugi always took his time noticing and analyzing such patterns. In a line of work where everyone was out to get him, picking up on these subtle cues came to be his shield of protection. After all, his intuition had yet to fail him.

While he did find some enjoyment in this hobby of his, more often than not, the conclusions he came up with disgusted him. Why was it that everyone appeared so carefree and lively when they had to share their land with the Amanto or, even worse, those filthy Bakufu dogs at the top? How could they possibly forget about what was taken from them, what was lost in the war? How could they afford to live so shamelessly, going about their days with smiles on their faces? Sometimes, he felt as if he was the only one who remembered, the only one whose wounds had yet to heal.

After such sessions, all he was left with was utter bitterness, directed at no one and everyone all at once. He detested that the world had somehow managed to move on when he was left all by himself in the past. There was no place for him to stand and breathe freely anymore. A passerby among passersby, that’s all he was. Just like the family of three that walked to his left, just like the old man selling takoyaki to his right, and just like the woman who-

“I’m so sorry!” The woman bowed. Her hands were clasped together, frantically moving up and down as if she meant to atone for the great sin of bumping into him.

“I’m terribly sorry, I really am, I’m just in a great hurry! If I don’t share these by evening, I’ll lose my job.” She went on, dropping to her knees.

An assortment of purple colored fliers had spread all around, some being carried around by the wind while the majority were scattered on the ground surrounding the two.

Looking down at her, an odd sense of familiarity rushed over him. A curtain of ruffled hair was obscuring her features, making it impossible for him to take a proper look at her face, yet he could swear this wasn’t his first time meeting with her.

Though she was the one who bumped into him, Takasugi ended up lowering himself beside her, using the fliers as an excuse to sate his curiosity. He picked the ones that were over to his side, stacking them up in a pile.

“Here.”

“Thank you so much! Once again I’m terribly sorry and, uh, please, feel free to keep one of these for a free drink!” The woman said, handing one of the fliers back to him.

The second her fingers touched his, it was as if time froze around them, or rather, as if time sent him to a bygone era, one that lived in his memories alone.

“Gotcha!” The girl said, waving his stolen headband before his eyes.

In a rapid dash, she moved out of his sight, her chuckle echoing through the endless rows of trees. She was always like that, seemingly doing everything and anything in her power to inconvenience him. His expressions were too funny; that was her reasoning and perhaps she was right. There was no malice in his glares, no real animosity that was meant for her. Though he never admitted it, the little games she put up were quite entertaining for him too.

Even when he finally caught up to her, his arms caging her body in a tight embrace, she never stopped laughing, not even for a second. He couldn’t remember what he was trying to do. Retrieve the headband? Hold her close? Time had hazed his memory in a mist, yet the one thing he was able to remember was her face. The eyes he adored staring into; the lips he adored kissing; the hair he adored caressing; everything that defined her.

Suddenly, she stopped putting up a fight, her limbs dropping on top of his arms as she turned around to face him.

“How do I look?” She asked with a smug smile, showing off the headband that was wrapped around her forehead.

Stunning as always, he thought.

“You look like you’ll never grow up.” He muttered in a stern tone. After all, his thoughts rarely matched his words when she was involved, a fact he came to terribly regret.

This face… could it be her?

He was now standing in the middle of the battlefield, the vile stench of blood and smoke numbing his senses as he moved through the countless corpses and rubble. Nothing but pain and anguish remained in the once lively village. Everything was reduced to ashes thanks to Amanto technology.

Following the explosion, a constant ringing vibrated in his ears, only falling second to the cries of a child and the shrieks of an elderly woman. No one was able to predict such calamity, not his men and certainly not him.

With each step Takasugi took, the lump in his throat increased in size, a foolish hope being the one thing that kept his legs moving forward. He’d barely realized what had just happened, barely aware of what he was searching for until his steps came to a halt. A white headband -one identical to the one he was sporting- was flowing with the wind between the rubble, confirming his worst fears at once.

Before he knew it, he was on his knees, cradling your ashen face between his fingers. Your eyes were semi-closed, blood running from the corners of your mouth. He looked at you, unable to grasp the reality that lied before him, the reality that he was about to lose you.

“Sh-Shinsuke.” A cough cut his name in half. “You came.” A frail attempt at a smile only worsened things for you, blood spewing onto his jacket.

“As I thought, it always looked best on you-” You said, your fingers trailing all the way up to his face before slowly dropping to your side.

“What are you talking about?” He failed to hide his fury. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Not to him and certainly not to you.

“Y/N.” He spoke your name in a softer tone, but you didn’t reply.

“Y/N!” He called out again, hoping that his voice had simply gone unregistered amidst the chaos surrounding him.

“Oi, Y/N! Pull yourself together!”

By the third time, he was yelling at you, violently shaking your body to no avail.

Refusing to give up, Takasugi took your hand in his, desperately trying to get a hold of you. He squeezed at it harder and harder, as if he could keep you to life with sheer strength alone, but it was already too late. No pulse, no nothing. You were just gone.

“Takasugi, we need to go! There might be more coming, get out of there!” Even Katsura’s voice wasn’t enough to snap him out of it.

For a mere second, he wished to quit. He had seen enough carnage for a lifetime and he was tired. What were they fighting for? What was it all for if they couldn’t even protect a minuscule mountain village? How could they possibly save an entire country or, hell, even the whole world? The thought sickened him. At the moment, all he wanted to do was lie next to you, beg you to take him to wherever it was you were going.

No matter how much he wanted to do just that, Takasugi realized that such a luxury was one he could never afford. Not when so many people depended on him, not when he knew what giving up meant. No matter what, he had to keep going, with or without you. This was unfair. So unfair.

He leaned closer, his fingers slightly trembling as he pulled the headband off your forehead, replacing it with the cleaner one he was wearing. His words from that day held a different meaning now that he came to realize; you were never going to grow up. The life he dreamed with you was extinguished in a flash.

Bringing a hand to your chin, he rubbed at your skin carefully, trying his best to remove the blood from your face. You nearly looked as if you were sleeping, he thought to himself, a heartbreaking thought that only fueled the tears in his eyes.

Katsura’s yells were clearer now, meaning that he was approaching, but Takasugi was not done. He had to do this. Even when he was unable to share his true feelings with you, he needed to make sure that he could do this one thing properly, that he could give you the goodbye you deserved.

His palm made its way onto your forehead, slightly lingering before dropping above your eyes, shutting them once and for all. He glanced down at his other hand, taking a good look at the headband he retrieved. Its edges were painted in a bright scarlet color, blood having seeped through the fabric, your blood. Without thinking twice, Takasugi clenched his fist around the material, shoving it in his pocket. This was the only keepsake he could have of you, a reminder and proof of your existence.

With a sigh, he laid your body back down onto the ground, thinking that this was the last moment you shared.

Yet…could it be that it wasn’t? Could it be that this blood was fake? Could it be that those tears were fake? Could it be that the person whose eyes he closed were never yours? Could it be that the woman in front of him was, as a matter of fact, you?

By the time Takasugi snapped back to reality, the pink color of your kimono had nearly faded into the distance, leaving him utterly confused as to what he’d just experienced. He could call you out, run after you, yet looking at the flier in his hand, he got a better idea.

“Snack Smile bar? What a lackluster name.” He muttered, crumbling the paper in his fist.

“Come in, come in! Heaven’s sigh’s girls will leave you sighing!”

“Boss, how about a drink with us? We promise to take good care of you.”

“Would you like a nurse to check on your vitals or an officer to apprehend you? Whatever your fantasy, we can grant it!”

The empty promises of the hostesses served as ambient sound to Takasugi’s ears while he strolled through Kabukicho. With his hat lowered before his eyes, he attempted to blend in with the crowd, stealing a glance at the signs of the buildings as he passed them by. Many had the word bar or snack in their name, yet no writing matched the one in his flier.

If he was being honest with himself, he was unsure of what he was trying to do. Obviously, he was looking for you, but what good could possibly come out of it? Perhaps your encounter had been brief, giving you no time to realize who it was, but even so, there was no way you were unable to recognize him. Either you played dumb for whatever reason he failed to pinpoint, or he was once again chasing after the ghosts of his past. Whatever the case was, he needed an answer.

After what felt like an eternity, he finally found himself outside Snack Smile. A girl in a peachy kimono was standing by the door, calling out to any passerby who seemed interested enough to take a peek at the place. Her smile was bright, though it lacked verity. If anything, it looked as if she was trying to keep people away, rather than invite them in.

“My, are you new here? I don’t think we’ve seen your face before, dear customer.” She directed him with a sweet tone. “Please come in and we’ll make sure to turn that frown upside down!”

What am I even doing here, Takasugi pondered to himself. This was obviously a mistake.

Reluctantly, he brought two fingers to his hat, tipping it forward as a means of agreement. If anything, he was so close to his goal that he might as well walk the walk. The girl caught onto his gesture, beckoning for him to follow her to the entrance.

Unlike the rest of his subordinates and his comrades from the war, Takasugi wasn’t overly fond of such places. His visits to Yoshiwara or cabaret bars were numbered, mostly limited to the carefully timed opportunities he created to strike beneficial business deals. There were only so many men who could resist the cheap thrills a woman offered. Combine that with alcohol and you earned yourself an agreeable ally.

To be fair, Takasugi preferred his partners sober enough, turning to such tactics only when the occasion demanded it. On the contrary, when it came down to him personally, well, he found no reason to be visiting such places all by himself. He spared no time to play around with ignorant little girls, though somehow, he had now managed to surround himself with a dozen of them.

Tall, short, blonde, brunette, lean and curvy; every type of girl with conventional beauty had gathered up around him, pulling him towards an empty booth. They were so eager to tend to his whims, oblivious to the fact that he was feeling rather uncomfortable with their touch-y and intrusive behavior. They had completely misread his intentions, but then again, who visits hostess bars without indulging?

In an attempt to make him feel more comfortable, a girl grabbed onto the strings of his hat, his hand removing hers in time. It wasn’t as if he could afford to be spotted and arrested here, of all places.

“Master, what will you have?” One of the girls cooed in his ear.

“You are so good looking, won’t you have a drink with us?” The second girl chimed in after his lack of a response.

“What about some Dom Peri? Would that be to your tastes?” Another one followed.

That’s right. If he stood there without even ordering, he’d attract even more attention to himself. Sighing, Takasugi fished the crumbled up paper from inside his pocket, sliding it across the table.

“Oh, you have one of those? Let me show you how our reward system works!” The first girl, a blonde with a dark blue kimono suggested, scooting closer to him.

“Every time you visit our bar, you get a stamp, slowly unlocking milestones with certain rewards. The first one is a free drink of your choice, and then when you reach this one.” She paused, pointing at the middle of the paper. “You get the chance to play Uno with one of our girls, how exciting!”

Is that how hostess bars operate?

“The final reward is a free bottle of our finest Dom Peri, one that isn’t even watered down!”

Takasugi crooked an eyebrow, unable to tell whether this was some sort of deliberate joke or if this was an actual reward system they had set up. Uno nights and watered down bottles of champagne, was this really what Edo had turned into?

“How many visits till that Uno session?”

“Oh, you are interested?” Not in particular. “It’s five visits and you can choose any of the girls to play with. Will you choose me?” The same girl asked, batting her eyelashes at him.

Any girl, huh…

Though he’d been seated for at least five minutes, none of the girls around him, nor the ones that served the customers in the other booths bore any resemblance to you. Could he be mistaken?

The blonde kept pestering him, her one arm locked around his elbow, with her other hand rubbing at his shoulder. His patience was wearing thin, but causing a scene wouldn’t fix anything. After all, she was merely doing her job.

“Sake.” Takasugi said, hoping that her departure could at least get him some room for breathing.

Surely enough, the girl jumped on her feet, the other two maintaining their distance all the while eyeing him.

All of a sudden, the loud thump of a glass breaking forced his attention to shift to the bar. A man with his arms crossed over his chest was barking at a girl, something about salaries and final mistakes. Repeatedly, she bowed her head up and down, her clasped hands moving in sync with the rest of her body. She was frantic, spelling out one ‘sorry’ after the other. Eventually, the man, presumably the owner of this place, raised his hand to dismiss her, stepping away from the scene.

The girl stood in place, only turning around after she was left alone. The second Takasugi got a proper look at her face, the same feeling he’d felt earlier reappeared; the same sensation of having the air sucked out of his lungs was back. It was her, the girl from before, that girl… you.

“What a klutz.” The brunette next to him exclaimed with a scoff.

“I know, right? When will she finally learn? Boss is too lenient with her.” The second brunette sighed.

“I guess what they say is right, the pretty ones sure have it easy.”

“What’s with that girl?” Takasugi inquired.

“What? Her? She came about 5 years ago I think.” The blonde from earlier had returned, setting a tray of glasses and alcohol on top of the table. “She is such a weirdo, other than her appearance there��s not much going on with her. Just because she has a few regulars, she thinks she is someone, but truth is, she’s just a lost cause. A nobody.”

She poured a drink for Takasugi, then handed the rest of the glasses to the other girls. Bringing it to her lips, she downed it in one go.

“You know, there is something seriously wrong with her.”

Takasugi tilted his head towards the brunette to his left. It looked like both these girls held some sort of grudge against their coworker and while hearing them badmouth you irked him, he wished to find out why.

“When she first came here, she wouldn’t even give us her name. Claimed she had no recollection of that nor her past, but if you ask me, she is hiding something. Or else she wouldn’t put up with all the names people give her.”

“Aho-chan, Hidoi-chan, Kagome-chan, that’s how she goes by. What a pitiful creature.” The third girl commented, tipping her glass between her fingers.

No name and no background. That certainly was strange, though it would suffice as an explanation. Whatever happened to you back then, the only way for you to be unable to recognize him or seek him out in the first place, would be for your memory to get wiped out. An unlike scenario, but it was what it was.

“Now girls, let’s not bore our customer with such tedious talk. Master, whatever it is that you want, this girl won’t be able to deliver. Me on the other side…” The blonde mewled into his ear, one finger running along the hem of his yukata.

“How much?” Takasugi asked with a forced smile.

“Hmm?”

“How much should I give for you to keep your hands off ?”

The girl was stunned, her confident act dropping at once. Hesitantly, she retrieved her hand, returning to her own seat without any protest.

“That’s so mean, master.” She frowned, an awkward chuckle following her words.

Takasugi reached a hand inside his clothes, dropping a handful of bills on the table. He peered at the expressions of the girls; half disturbed, half excited at the sight of the money. They were all doing their best to keep their distance from him, scared of receiving the same treatment their friend did. Good leeches.

“This should be more than enough to cover your entire shifts. Leave.” Takasugi dismissed them.

Obeying, the three of them reached out to the table, each gathering their share before walking away.

“Not you.” He nodded at the blonde with his glass.

“Oh? Have you changed your mind, mas-”

“Add four more stamps to this, if you wish for a bonus.” He said, pushing the flier in her direction.

“But-

“This isn’t a request.” He cut her off, deliberately glancing down at the sword around his waist.

The girl slid a hand inside her pouch, pulling a red stamp out. Fortunately, she was smart enough to understand that he wasn't in the mood for playing around.

A game of uno wasn’t much of a reward, but adding you to the equation, he was left with no choice. If his theory was correct, then by his next visit, all the pieces to the puzzle would come together, or so he hoped.

“Please come again.” She muttered with next to zero enthusiasm, leaving his sight along with her bonus.

At last, silence.

For the rest of the night, Takasugi remained in the booth all by himself. A couple of girls attempted to approach him, though his previous companions managed to spread the word in time. ‘He is dangerous, he is crazy, he is… boring.’ He didn’t need to hear them to imagine the kind of things they were whispering to each other’s ears. After all, he was no stranger to such unimaginative discrimination.

A long while passed, and soon the only ones in the bar were him and a couple of merchants in the far back. Despite having consumed far more alcohol than the free drink he had been promised, he was feeling quite sober, his mind focused solely on you.

Following the accident you caused, your boss assigned you to a new post, forcing you to be on the move between the bar and the storage room. Each time you entered with a new crate, your expression seemed wearier than before, your legs on the verge of giving out. Judging from past experiences, lifting weights was never your forte.

Takasugi smiled right before his lips touched the glass. Some things never change.

By the time he finished his final drink, the bar had been completely emptied out, giving him the perfect opportunity to act out. He fixed his hat and clothes, propping his arm onto the hilt of his sword while he sluggishly made his way out of the store. He had no clue where said storage room was, but the probability of it being just past the back alley was pretty high.

It was dark and he couldn’t see much, the distant neon lights being the sole source of light. He could only stumble around, until his foot hit a crate, sending it flying towards a brick wall. The impact was followed by a shriek, one loud enough to obscure every and any sound that came from the bustling city.

Realizing what happened, Takasugi stepped in, his hands reaching out just in time to capture the falling champagne bottles from your hands.

“Thank you so much!" The voice exclaimed, belonging to none other than you.

If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t have tripped in the first place.

Picking up on some of the bottles, he did his best to share the burden equally between the two of you. They were quite heavy, he realized, three of them being enough to weigh him down. There was no way you could manage such a task all by yourself.

On the way to the front door, you kept asking him to let go, assuring him that he’d already done enough, but he was having none of it. He even assisted you with putting them back on the shelves, ignoring your pleas to let go. He wasn't helping you for the sake of helping you; he just couldn't stand the sound of another glass shattering. Or at least, that’s how he justified his actions.

After everything was in place and your duty was fulfilled, Takasugi excused himself, seeing no more reason to stick around. Having a conversation without getting the chance to rationalize this absurdity would not end well.

“It’s you, isn’t it?” Your voice made him freeze in his stead.

“You remember?”

“Of course I do!” He turned around, his eye searching for yours in the darkness.

“I’m so sorry for bumping into you earlier and running away like this.” He felt his own heart sinking, the glimmer of hope disappearing as fast as it appeared.

Even if it was dark, your face was perfectly visible to him. Everything appeared to be the same as he remembered, as if not even a day had gone by since he last saw you. Everything but your eyes, that was. You used to look at him with such endearment and affection, such that was enough to thaw his icy exterior without any effort, but now that's gone. You bore the eyes of a stranger looking at another stranger.

“Are you from around here? What’s your name?”

“Shinsuke.”

“Shinsuke huh… that’s such a nice name. Don’t think I’ve met anyone who goes by that before.”

“I… see.” Hearing his name coming out of his lips stirred something within him. He had missed that sound more than he could ever admit.

“What brings you here, Shinsuke-san?”

“I was looking for someone. A woman.” He specified.

“Hm? Have you come here for one of our girls? Who is it?”

“Y/N.” It had been so long since he’d last called your name out, especially to your face. Part of him hoped that hearing it would have the same effect for you as it did for him.

“Y/N… I don’t think there is anyone working for us with such a name. Could it be that she gave you a stage name or nickname?”

He was unsure of what to answer. Such a charade was ridiculous.

“I guess the person I’m looking for doesn’t exist anymore.” Takasugi mumbled, turning his back on you. There was no point in trying. The woman he once loved was gone. It was about time he accepted that.

As he was about to leave, his sleeve getting tugged downwards caught his attention. A pair of delicate fingers were holding onto it, with another pair of pleading orbs staring right into his.

“Some girls do that. They give fake names because the owners don’t allow us to give our real names to clients. I’m sure she didn’t mean anything by that. You said her name was Y/N, right? I’ll try asking around to see what I can find.”

“There’s no need for that.” He attempted to leave, yet your clutching kept him in place.

“I want to help! Compensation for crashing into you and uh… a thank you for your assistance.”

Takasugi placed his hand on top of yours, briefly stuttering at the softness of your knuckles before he pulled your fingers off his sleeve. Your persistence was making things harder for him, another leftover trait of your past self. This wasn’t you, he reminded himself. A person with no memories was not themselves anymore. This wasn’t you, this wasn’t you, this wasn’t—

“Come again soon, Shinsuke-san!”

Even when his steps were taking him away from you, Takasugi realized that sooner than later they’d be bringing him back.

“Uno!” You cheerfully proclaimed, slamming a wild draw four card on top of the pile.

Takasugi shook his head as he scattered his cards across the table, an assortment of green and yellow clashing with the dark cedar. This was the fifth round you’d won in a row and although he didn’t want to admit defeat, perhaps going for so long without playing the game had turned him rusty. He used to beat you with such ease back in the day that he wasn’t prepared to face any sort of resistance. Could it be that he was more preoccupied with figuring out what had happened, or did your amnesia come with a streak of luck?

“Again.” With gritted teeth, Takasugi shuffled and stacked the cards once more. He wasn’t intending to end this on a loss. Besides, the reward didn’t specify how many rounds of Uno he could play.

Dealing seven cards to each of you, he took his time to study your expression. Your eyes darted between your hands, a loose smile hanging upon your lips that he couldn’t decode. Was it possible that you had another draw four? Nah, that couldn’t be it right? Unless you cheated, there was no such way.

Before you started the round, you reached a hand to the sake bottle, pouring the two of you another set of drinks whilst holding onto the cards with the other. Unsurprisingly enough, you ended up spilling more alcohol outside rather than inside the glasses, making a mess out of the table. What a lousy hostess.

As he was about to take a sip, your chuckle forced him to turn around.

“Is this your first time playing, Shinsuke-san? You’re pretty awful at this.” You exclaimed in a gleeful tone, bringing the glass to your lips.

“Should hostesses be looking down on their customers ?” He argued, shifting through the cards in his hand. A wild card and a reverse card, not bad at all.

“Should customers be threatening hostesses with swords?”

Unaware of his action, Takasugi tightened his grip around the glass.

Up to that point, your behavior had been nothing out of the ordinary. Unlike the other girls who kept their distance from his table, you didn’t seem particularly wary of him. Considering your relationship with your coworkers, he had assumed that the rumor hadn’t reached your ears, but apparently he was wrong.

“Don’t worry about it. Kasumi-chan has a tendency of overreacting.” You assured, revealing the first card of the deck; eight red. “Hmm.” You played a two.

“What if she wasn’t?” He teased, dropping a four.

“Well…” You contemplated, carefully browsing through your hand. “You wouldn’t hurt her, would you?”

Green four.

“What makes you think I wouldn’t?"

“You helped me out yesterday. Even if you are a Joui or whatever, unless you had good intentions, you wouldn’t have bothered.”

Takasugi shrugged, dropping a 6.

“Besides…” He looked up at you, finding a slight smile tremble upon your lips. “You must have really wanted to play uno with me, huh?”

So she’d heard the full story. Admittedly, he shouldn’t have acted on such impulse, but then again why did that girl feel entitled to interfere with his personal affairs? Perhaps he should have dropped more than empty threats on her.

Returning his attention to the game, Takasugi tried to keep his cool, yet his grimace gave out how he really felt. With his lips curling into a scowl, he threw more alcohol down his throat, pushing the glass back to your side. This wasn’t the way he pictured this night going.

While he was caught up in his own thoughts, you acted upon your turn, dropping two green cards onto the pile.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” He growled, forcefully grabbing you by the wrist the second you played them.

You blinked, looking at him with confusion.

“Skip… card?” Your gaze fell onto the fallen cards below; a green skip and a green seven.

Oh.

In an attempt to save face, Takasugi released his grip, wondering how many more hits his pride could suffer before he snapped. If he didn’t know any better, he would have thought that your presence was the cause of jumpiness, but that couldn't be the case, right? A mere hostess, even if such was you, wasn't enough to make him nervous.

For the next 5 minutes or so, you kept on throwing cards one after the other in complete silence, the voices of the rest of the crowd filling in the gaps. To focus on winning or to focus on extracting information; Takasugi felt himself waver between the two choices. Whether he admitted it or not, your reappearance had left him in a distressed state that he absolutely detested.

"So are you?" You broke through the quiet, changing the color to yellow with a five.

"Hm?" Takasugi inquired, switching the color back to blue with a wild card.

"A Joui."

"What if I am? Will you report me?" He smirked.

"Should I?" You mused, browsing your hand before pulling a card from the deck, one you ended up not playing.

He shrugged, throwing a blue six. "It doesn’t matter if you do. I don’t intend to switch lanes now."

"Then… What is it that you intend to do?"

"Bring about an end to all this." He nonchalantly admitted, weighing your reaction.

He expected to find at least a glimpse of surprise or a hint of recognition, yet he spotted neither. Not only did he fail to reignite your memory, but it also looked as if you were completely unfazed by what he’d said.

"Sounds ominous." You said, at last.

"What about you?"

"Am I a Joui?" You pondered as you pulled another card. "I doubt it, though I can’t be too sure." Blue eight.

Takasugi raised an eyebrow, eager to hear the rest of the story. Finally, he’d brought you exactly where he wanted you to be.

"There was an accident many years ago. At least that’s what the people who found me said. In reality, I can’t remember anything. The accident, that place, the people I used to know, the girl I used to be… it’s all blank. Each time I try to recall such details, my head begins to tick like a time bomb." You admitted, going through your cards.

"It’s funny though. I could be someone’s daughter, someone’s friend, or someone’s lover and I wouldn’t even know about it."

There was sorrow in the way you spoke, a faint smile appearing and the disappearing in an instant. To have all the answers to your questions, Takasugi felt great guilt plaguing him. Your loss had always been one of the many he was responsible for, another regret to add onto the over-increasing burden of his soul. If he'd gotten there faster, if he’d gotten word of the attack before it happened, if, if, if…

He thought there was no way to change the past, but now that he saw the very same past unraveling before his eye, he was uncertain of what he was supposed to do. Perhaps it was better that you didn’t remember him. What one could consider a curse was in reality a blessing in disguise. There was no need for you to remember what was taken from you, what was lost because of him, or even him. Yes, it was better like this.

Reaching for his empty glass, he was quick to pour himself another drink, only to realize that the bottle was just as empty. The irony, he thought to himself, pushing it aside. No matter how much he tried to fill his own void, it would always come down to this, he realized.

"What about your name?" Takasugi sighed, drawing a card. Had he played his reverse card, then the game would have ended right then and there, but he didn’t mean to do that just yet. Not when you have yet to reveal all your cards for him to see.

Once his turn was over, you pulled two cards from the deck, glancing at your hand and then the eight he had previously dropped.

"I don’t remember that either. Everyone here gives me a different name, though most of them are pretty horrible." You said, earning a sympathetic nod from him.

"Oh, I didn’t mean to complain. It’s fine, really, I don’t mind at all. Feel free to call me however you want to."

"How about Y/N?" He suggested in a rather affectionate tone.

"Isn’t that the name of the girl you are looking for?"

"Didn’t you hear me?" He inquired, flicking the remaining two cards between his fingers. "That girl exists no longer."

"Y/N… it does have a nice ring." You beamed with excitement. "But are you sure it’s fine?"

"A pitiful hostess with no memories or name, and a ghost who only exists in memory. You might as well claim that name, she won't be asking back for it."

After all, it’s yours.

"Y/N." You said in a quiet tone. "Y/N," you said more confidently.

"It suits you." Takasugi nodded in acknowledgement, a hint of a smile spreading across his features. At least now he wasn’t the only one holding onto this name.

Peering at his cards one final time, he let the reverse one drop onto the center of the table. There was no point in stalling his victory any further, not when the outcome was already set.

"Uno."

"You win."

"Not bad for a first timer." He smirked.

Admittedly, Takasugi enjoyed his reward much more than he thought he would. Not once in a million years would he consider that he’d get the chance to glance at your smile or hear your voice ever again, let alone play a game of cards at a crappy bar in Kabukicho. It all felt so surreal, but for now, there was no doubt. It was really you.

"Another round?" You asked, shuffling the cards between your fingers.

At that moment, Takasugi stood up, attaching his sword back to his hip. It was time to go. Searching through his yukata, he fished a couple of bills out, sliding them towards your side.

"I’m afraid it’s time for me to make an exit."

"Shinsuke-san." You hesitated, your eyes darting between the table and his own.

"I enjoyed our game."

He nodded, attempting to make his way out when you stopped him again.

"Will you be coming again?"

It was his time to consider things. Perhaps other than your memory, you weren’t all that different, yet the same couldn’t be said about him. He wasn’t the same boy you fell in love with over ten years ago, the one who could afford to fool around and play uno with you as if he had no care in the world. What was left of him could barely make up for the person he used to be; scattered pieces of a vengeful and hollow beast pieced together into who he was today. Could such a man even dream of reconciling with his past?

Takasugi had no answer for that. At least not right now, when your eyes were pleading him to stay. He wanted to see you again, yet he doubted whether he should. For the first time in a while, his selfish desires were standing in his way, and he wasn’t sure how to handle it.

Without saying a word, he waltzed towards the door, wishing that the watchful gaze of the stars would prevent him from repeating any past mistakes, at least for the night.

The following days found Takasugi spiraling through an endless abyss of question marks, the weight of his choice following him throughout his affairs to the point where he could not concentrate on anything else.

If he told you all about your shared past and who you really were, that smile you greeted him with would be erased in an instant. The pain you’d escaped would cling onto you like it did to him, the clutches of a beast he could never escape. To subject you to such suffering, to bring such a future to you… how could he ever do that?

On the other hand, knowing that to you he was no more than a mere stranger, that all those memories you created together had scattered through the wind, Takasugi felt his heart aching. Even if it was selfish, he couldn’t help himself from showing up before you, day after day, hoping that somehow everything would get solved on its own. That he’d get to hold your hand and kiss your lips once more, just once, even if there was no tomorrow for him.

Perhaps that’s what it meant to love someone to death. As long as you are able to make a step towards them, as long as your hand can reach out, then nothing can stand in the way, not even death.

With his mind set on vengeance and his heart on you, the thin line between right and wrong became even thinner. He was more perplexed than he’d ever been, his inner conflict clouding more than just his thoughts. The sleepless nights he used to spend by himself in the comfort of his room had lessened, finding him among bottles of sake and the very same carefree people he loathed. Even when he couldn’t decide on what to do, he was adamant regarding his visits to Snack Smile, as if all the answers were hidden behind those eyes of yours.

Soon enough, the flier in his hands approached the dreaded tenth mark milestone. With each visit granting him another stamp, Takasugi caught himself counting the days down to his final reward. There was no point in going through all this trouble for a cheap bottle of champagne, he was well aware of that. But, earning himself such a trophy was far from being his actual reason. In reality, the flier served as some sort of countdown, putting a number to the days you had left. After all, he’d finally made up his mind; the day he received his final mark, would be the day he’d say goodbye to you, once and for all.

And so, with your days numbered, there was a certain bitter aftertaste that accompanied both his arrival and his departure, the heavy atmosphere that lingered feeling heavier than before. He’d already lost you once. This should have been easier, but it wasn’t. The end he sought after was sure to leave his tainted soul with yet another scar. Was that what it meant to do the right thing? He wouldn’t know.

By the end of the week, he’d visited your bar five times. A total of eight marks filled the boxes of the flier, making him wish that he hadn’t threatened that girl to speed things up in the first place. He only needed two more stamps to end things properly with you, yet as he marched his way towards his sixth visit, he started to get cold feet.

Standing outside the bar at the crack of dawn, he wondered what the hell he was doing there. For once, there was no way the bar was open at such an early hour. He was too late, or too early, depending on how one looked at it. But even if it wasn’t, what was he supposed to say? Why would the goodbye of a stranger be of any importance to you?

Being in such deep thought, he barely noticed your fatigued form coming out of the bar, with a pair of garbage bags dangling between your hands.

"Shinsuke-san? What are you doing here?" Your sleepy eyes came to life upon seeing his, your expression lighting up your entire face.

"Just passing by." He shrugged, feeling the strain in his throat as he spoke.

You walked past him, disposing of the bags as quickly as possible.

"We are closed for business, but… would you like to come in?" You suggested, pointing at the door with your thumb.

"I’m good." He shook his head.

"You came all this way, it’d be a shame to go without having a drink at the very least."

Unable to come up with another excuse, Takasugi glanced at the sky and then at you. The first morning rays poured over you like a halo, dousing your figure in a warm light. Even when your eyes were plagued with dark circles, you appeared more beautiful than ever.

"I won’t take no for an answer. If you don’t come in, I’m reporting you." A chuckle broke through your threat, your head tilting to the side. "Just one drink. It’s on me, okay?"

How could he possibly say no when you put it like that? The moment Takasugi sighed, you both knew what his answer was. So much for his unyielding resolve.

Inside the bar, empty chairs were flipped on top of empty tables, the faint smell of alcohol and smoke having yet to dissipate. He followed you to an empty booth, setting his sword to the side before taking a seat. You told him to wait, returning minutes later with your drinks. If sake wasn’t his preferred choice, he would have thought that you were a cheapskate who couldn’t afford anything else. At least you didn’t seem to be one of those pushy Dom Peri girls.

"As expected, sake tastes best with good company." You exclaimed, drinking your first shot.

He smiled, following suit.

"I bet you have lots of good company to drink with."

"No one as interesting as an Uno loving samurai."

"Or a clumsy hostess with no recollection of the past." A chuckle followed his comment, the sound of your laughter echoing through the empty space.

"Y/N. What made you choose this path for yourself?"

"Hmm…" You pondered out loud, pouring the two of you some more alcohol. "Just like you said, I’m clumsy and have no recollection of my past. What could someone like me do to survive? Serving drinks and chatting with people is something anyone can do, me included."

"Do you like it here?"

You took your time before answering, glancing at him, your glass, the bottle, the table, the entrance, and then again from the top. Whatever answer you were planning on giving, it didn’t matter. After all, your reaction said enough.

"It’s okay. The pay isn’t bad and the girls are nice to me. Our boss is quite forgiving of my mistakes too, I manage just fine."

No, you don’t. If that was the case, you wouldn’t be forced to clean up their mess by yourself, all alone and exhausted.

Rather than argue back, Takasugi pressed his glass tight against his lips. He’d hoped that at least he’d leave you to a better fate than the one that awaited you with him.

Some time passed with the two of you drinking through the contents of the bottle together in silence, neither being too sure on how to proceed.

"There’s something I haven’t told you."

He raised an eyebrow, letting go of his glass for a moment.

"I asked around for the girl, the real Y/N."

Takasugi inhaled deeply before exhaling, his fingers clenching into a fist against the hard wood.

"There is no real or fake Y/N for you to find. What remains is only you. You are Y/N."

"But-"

He dropped his hand onto the table, the thump cutting through your words.

More silence.

"What was she like?" You had no intention of giving up. Unless he gave you some answers, you would keep on asking him.

Sighing, he reached for the bottle himself, giving you both a refill.

"A nuisance."

"A nuisance?" You asked, a hearty laugh evading your lips.

What was so funny about it?

"No one starts with a person’s negative traits unless it’s someone they care deeply for. You must’ve really loved Y/N, Shinsuke-san."

He looked up at you, at the eyes he so adoringly used to look at. Time may have erased your memory, yet it never managed to extinguish the love he held for you. For a second, he wished that you could share that sentiment, that his stare could somehow pour some of that emotion back into you. He didn’t want to be alone in this, not anymore.

"I’m sorry that I couldn’t find her for you." You sincerely said. "I was hoping you’d be leaving here with a smile."

Takasugi pulled his gaze away from yours, toying with the empty glass between his fingers. It looked like that goodbye had come up sooner than he’d anticipated.

"Then drink with me today. Until my own memory gets hazy, until I manage to forget, drink with me. Ignorance comes with bliss."

Slowly, you nodded at him with hesitation. If you could peer into his thoughts, you’d be able to see that such a thing could never happen. Even if all was lost, he could never forget nor forsake you. No amount of alcohol was capable of bringing him such deliverance. As long as he lived, he’d hold onto these memories like a martyr, making sure that there was at least one of you that remembered. After all, he was prepared to carry such a heavy cross the second he walked into that bar.

Just like Takasugi suggested, the two of you finished the first bottle of sake together, followed by another and then another. Your hand began to tremble halfway through, liquor spilling onto the table and the glasses. He did his best to finish his drinks before you finished yours, making sure that he was the one to drink the majority of the content. Drunk and exhausted was not an ideal state for you to be in.

Still, he forgot to take into consideration the fact that you’d been working all night long, most likely having finished many more bottles with other clients. It didn’t take long for you to collapse. The sun had fully come out now, bathing your skin in a lovely and vibrant light as you rested on top of the table. Your palms had turned into a makeshift pillow, with your cheek finding comfort within. The sound of your breathing befell the room like a quiet lullaby, your chest moving up and down in sync with it.

Takasugi kept drinking by himself, catching you squinting and quietly grunting from time to time. You were mumbling something incoherent that he failed to pick up on, yet once he brought his hand before your eyes, you went quiet. A smile spread across your lips, with a delighted sigh following right after. Takasugi muffled a giggle, propping his elbow onto the table so that he could keep on shielding you from the light with his body.

Unable to help it, he traced the outline of your cheek with the back of his finger, tugging a couple of loose strands behind your ear. You looked so peaceful, he thought as he dragged his index across your features. The last time he’d looked at you like this, he was the one to shut your eyes, unaware of the fact that you’d been fighting your way back to him.

He brought his finger down to your nose and then to your lips, ghosting over them in a light motion. You talked back at him so many times with this mouth of yours, bringing him headache more times than he could count.

Where’s that sharp tongue of yours now, he pondered, dragging your bottom lip downwards. Such a lousy hostess that can’t even handle her liquor, falling asleep before a man whom she barely even knows. What a pathetic sight.

So very... pathetic.

Before he even knew it, his lips met with yours, a feeling of utter bliss taking over him at last. Right or wrong, who was he to differentiate the two. In that final moment with you, nothing else mattered. He selfishly claimed this one final memory for himself, hoping it'd be enough to last him a lifetime.

I won’t take my chances with you anymore. This time… be happy. Be happy and never look back, not at your past and certainly not at me. If we ever meet again… No. Even if we meet again in this or our next life, walk past me as if we were strangers. Goodbye, Y/N.

And just like that, his ghost hunt came to an end.

By the time Takasugi reached the docks, the streets of Edo were bustling with the sounds of people. Some going to work, others returning, and then those who simply strolled around. Even more so than before, he felt like a fish out of water, unable to truly fit within the crowd. It was as if he was returning from a great battle, one that he'd inevitably lost.

Silently, he slipped back inside his ship, a couple of members from his faction bidding him 'good morning'. He nodded them off, unwilling to engage in any small talk. Such trivialities seemed rather pointless at the moment.

Just before he returned to his room, Takasugi made a stop by one of the common rooms, finding Matako and Takechi conversing, or rather arguing with one another as per usual. The two went quiet at his entrance, letting him say what he had to say without any disturbances.

Once that was out of the way, he was finally able to rest. Or at least that was his plan. He removed his bandages, neatly stacking them upon his nightstand. Bringing his palm above his destroyed eye, he traced his skin all the way to his lips, finding himself terribly missing your warmth. With his wish granted, he felt no better than he did before. If anything, water had managed to seep through the cracks of his void, threatening to drown him along with what was left of him.

Hoping for a moment of repose, Takasugi leaned back against the covers of his futon, yet such moment never came. Perhaps the daylight was too strong or his thought were simply too loud. Either way, he couldn't tell.

Giving up on that plan of his, he got up, the shamisen in the corner of the room catching his eye. Maybe if he could at least counter these thoughts with something louder, he could find some solace.

Time went by swiftly, with the light burning brighter and then fading into the backdrop. A dejected melody accompanied his equally dejected musings, with his fingers aimlessly holding onto the bachi. What his words could not speak, his music transmitted perfectly. A requiem of despair.

"Shinsuke, what's all this about?" The voice of a certain green haired samurai cut through his tune, followed by the thump of the door. "Matako told me we are leaving tomorrow, is that true?”

“What if it is.” Takasugi responded, refusing to look his way.

“I thought we’d be staying until the end of the month.”

“Something came up.”

“And that is?”

There was nothing for him to say to that. Whether they stayed in Edo or not, it didn't make a difference. He'd finally cut all loose threads, no point hanging around this hell hole of a city.

Bansai moved across the room, his steps taking him to the window where Takasugi was seated. Quietly, he observed him, listening to his song as if he meant to nitpick his intentions by the mere sound of it. He folded his hands over his chest, resting against the opposite side of the frame, with his head lightly moving along to the rhythm.

"Your tempo has changed, I daresay."

Most probably for the worse, Takasugi thought to himself.

“I have a gift for you.”

Holding onto the instrument with his legs, Takasugi reached a hand in his yukata, revealing the purple flyer. Nine marks stained its surface, only one requirement away from the "grand prize". He'd held onto this thing for days, but now he found no use for it. Disposing it while he could, was the only sensible choice.

“I’m not sure I’m following, Shinsuke.” Bansai mumbled, flipping the pamphlet between his fingers.

“There's no need to. Just accept the gift.” Takasugi said, his attention shifting back to the shamisen.

“This is very unlike you, I daresay.“

With the music picking up once again, Bansai moved outside of the room, taking his so called gift with him.

There was no telling how much time had passed, the never-ending melody stubbornly persisting. Takasugi felt numb, each of his thoughts melting away underneath his fingertips. By now, he should have met with you. Would you be disappointed that Bansai showed up instead of him? That was unlikely. Who'd be distressed over a stranger?

That's right. It didn't matter anymore. He'd given up on you, he had no right contemplating over such things. It was over. It really was.

“You’re back early.” His voice felt raspier after going for so long without speaking a word.

“I met with the girl.” Bansai admitted, stepping into the room. His tone was near suggestive, hinting that this was far from all he had to say.

Curious to see what comes next, Takasugi let go of the shamisen, an eerie quietness befalling the room as he set it to the side.

“… And?”

“And I must ask, who is that girl, Shinsuke?”

“A good for nothing hostess.” Takasugi sneered.

Bansai sighed, doubting that Takasugi was giving him the full story. More often than not, he was able to read into his thoughts with greater ease than most. Even if he didn't poke his nose into his business, he had no intention to let this one slide, and for once, Takasugi wasn't too appreciative of his friend's feature.

“That good for nothing hostess said I can’t accept it on your stead. You should know better than to give gifts one can't redeem.” He dropped the flyer onto the floor beside him.

“Is that so?" Takasugi inquired with zero interest, merely glancing at it and then looking away.

“There’s more to the story, I daresay." Bansai continued, his fingers browsing through his teal colored coat. "She asked of me to bring this to you. Said she’ll be waiting for you to return it one day.”

Takasugi glanced over at him, his eye widening upon receiving the item from his hands.

“I believe you recognize this. Then, I’ll leave you to it.” Bansai said before finally making his exit.

There was no way... right? This couldn't be it... right?

At the moment, Takasugi struggled to understand the meaning of it, seemingly lost as he studied the material. His fingers went over the fabric with great care, tracing each and every seam as if they were sacred. This was far from being the only one of it's kind, yet there was no room for doubt; this white headband could only be the very same that once belonged to him, the one he'd traded you all those years back.

"Such a foolish woman." He huffed in a low tone, his lips curving into a smile. Even when he'd given you a chance at happiness, you'd chosen to fall back into your own misery. What kind of fool does that?

Yet, such a foolish woman had managed to fool him. He wasn't any better, he realized to his dismay, guilty over the sudden rush of relief. Even by a little, the weight he'd been so adamant to carry by himself had been lifted, with or without his consent. He really thought that he could take it, but there you were again, stirring up trouble from miles apart. To think that he'd fallen for such a nuisance.

Lacing his fingers around the headband, Takasugi leaned back against the window. A sigh evaded his lips once he finally closed his eye.

Perhaps the destruction of the world was always meant to be celebrated with a cheap bottle of champagne.

A/N: Originally I planned to end it at this, but then I realized that the ending might be a bit unclear, so I'll add myself a mini QnA to explain certain things!

Q1: Did she know who he was all along?

A1: Nope. In reality she didn't reveal the whole truth to him. She had memories of a man and their times together, but she couldn't remember who that was or even his name. After she met Takasugi again, all those missing pieces came together and by the last time he visited her, she knew who he was.

Q2: If she still loves him, then why not tell him?

A2: Though Takasugi hasn't changed that much, she could tell that he had something going on that was bigger than their little love story. She knows him better than most and so she wouldn't want to stand in the way of his path.

Q3: Then why reveal it at the end?

A3: Takasugi may have been strong enough to stay true to his decision of ending things, but she wasn't. When he kissed her, she was able to feel it and when she realized that this was goodbye, she couldn't accept that this was their end. Even if it's harder for them to pine over one another, she hoped that by revealing her cards to him and giving him a place to return to, then one day he will.

Q4: So will he return?

A4: It might take some time, but he definitely will. After all, he has a headband to return and a drink to share.

Q5: Dom Peri is very expensive, why did you call it cheap?

A5: In comparison to his precious memories of her, Dom Peri feels very cheap to Takasugi.

#takasugi shinsuke #takasugi #takasugi gintama #takasugi shinsuke x reader #takasugi x reader #takasugi reader #takasugi angst #takasugi fanfiction #takasugi imagine #takasugi one shot #gintama imagine #gintama fanfiction #gintama oneshot #gintama angst #request

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arcadejohn127-9 · 4 years ago

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I read the Diavolos ball and angsty stuff, can I please please please get a happy ending to go with it?

This has been a highly requested and I must give my poor followers comfort after this straight up angst

So everyone, let's get into it! Some hurt and comfort to soothe your hearts

Warning: angst, long

I'll be putting this under readmore as it is long and I have had someone before say they wanted me to add it on long posts, I never really got any feedback about what I could do better and how this will help with people's viewing but I understand why, long posts can be annoying

If you guys think I should do this with all my long posts please comment or dm me or even state it in asks/requests - I wanna do what I can to make things enjoyable for people

Part 1 - beginning

Diavolo's ball aftermath

It's been a few days since they've seen you; they expected to find you in the dorm. Some fear you went back to the human world; there was no messages, no note - there was nothing. You were completely gone.

Everyone was losing it. The brothers got more aggressively with each other, no longer able to have you come between them. Your presence was so soothing to all of them but now you were gone. As soon as they realized you were gone the whole air of the dorm shifted. It wasn't right.

Mammon got desperate to know where you were. He handed one of his crows a necklace he got you, you promised to never take it off. His heart shattered when he saw it was on your desk. He wasn't sure what he did wrong - why did you take it off? What happened to you?

It wasn't long before the crow came back to the devildom; reporting that you were in fact in the human world. The brothers were devastated. They had to tell the others and they had to watch the hopeful shine in their eyes die.

They could all feel thankful you were unharmed but you were so far. You did this to get away from them. You didn't even leave a damn note!

Diavolo ordered everyone to go to the human world. They all split up into different parties to get you, whoever could get you first had to interrogate you. It didn't take a genius to understand that the Noble told you something horrible - why else would you have such a reaction? Barbatos was tasked to 'calmly discuss' that night with said noble but regardless of how rough and merciless he was; he refused to talk.

It was wasting time and energy. If he wasn't going to talk then they had to get the answer from you. A few were able to gather the gist of what he told you from your conversation before you disappeared; you were convinced you were being used and just a replacement, a pawn to them.

They wanted the full story. The whole reason. Anything! Just to understand why you would push them away and disappear like this. What have they done to make the nobles words feel so real to you? They needed to fix it.

The demon brother's split into a team of two; eldest and youngest, the royals stayed together and the elder exchange students were a double team aswell.

The crows lead the teams their way, splitting up to different routes to see if they could circle you so they could talk to you even if you decided to run.

In the end they found you, you were across the pavement, a train coming. The pedestrian stop dinged as it commanded people to stop but the men couldn't help themselves.

"(Y/N)!!!"

You whipped around, shocked. You thought your ears were playing tricks on you but there was the boys. Your boys. Tears bubbled in your eyes. You couldn't believe it. They followed you to the human world.

The world slowed down; the wind blowing against you as your eyes widened at the sight of them. They looked exhausted, some even with tear streaked cheeks. The more impulsive bunch being held back so they don't go running towards you. The street lights illuminated all of you; their appearance looked just as broken as their hearts.

The train rammed itself between you all. Disturbing the moment with its blaring horn, the screeching wheels ringing in your ears. It was the second you had to decide; do you run? Or do you stay?

To let them get you and finally face your emotions or run away, avoid everything and keep letting despair consume you.

You stayed. You couldn't move at all. It was if you were glued to the spot. But you knew it was just your heart aching for them; desperate to hold them and cry out your pain.

As soon as they could, they all rushed to your side. Hugging you, grabbing at your arms and head to pull you close to them. You choked on your tears as you let the 11 men hug you and check your face and clothes. All just wanting to make sure you were really there and unharmed.

You missed them all dearly and you were so happy they missed you too.

But then the big question was asked.

"what happened that night?"

"he said he was happy to meet me...asked for a dance and I said yes, I never should of, he kept telling me I was just Diavolo's pawn, Lilith's replacement and convinced me none of actually cared for me....I believed him.....I felt so unsure and he knew so much about us I just couldn't stop the doubts in my head....I'm so sorry-!"

Lucifer:

He couldn't believe that noble said that to you

He hastily grabbed your face, wiping away your tears

"You will never be and never have been her replacement, you are your own person, your connection to our sister means nothing other than comfort that she was able to be happy and that's it - I apologize if we have made you feel like you are a replacement and have compared you to her.... please understand we just miss her very dearly but we all want you in our life more than anything."

You buried your face into his shoulder

Sobbing your heart out as you kept chanting apologies and gratitude in a broken voice

He silenced you, holding you close

The prideful demon hid his face as best as he could and let tears drip down his cheeks

He was so relived to have you back

It seemed that noble wasn't only going to be visited by barbatos

Lucifer was not known for being merciful

Mammon:

He grabbed your arm and hastily tugged you towards him

His other hand cradled the back of your head

"Don't ever run away again, you understand?! I'm supposed to be the one protecting ya and how am I supposed to do that if you're off running in different realms without telling anyone??!! That noble doesn't know anything! I don't know how he knew about Lilith but you ain't her, you're (Y/N) And that's it! You are your own person - you gotta call out my dumbass-ary if I compare or make you feel that way, I would never do it on purpose! I like you and only you! I can't lose you again!"

He pushed his forhead against yours

A shaky exhale leaving him

You tried to apologize but he cut you right off, hugging you closer

He was going to make that Noble pay for ever making you doubt yourself like this

To doubt how much he loves you

Levithan:

He was already crying

He was crying before you even considered crying

He rushed to you and grabbed your hands

"I got so scared I did something, Don't listen to that normie! Normies are losers for a reason! There's no one else I would want as my best friend - no one will ever be a better game partner than you! You always make me feel happy and proud to be me-! I couldn't ask for anything more from you! I miss Lilith but I miss you even more! You're my favourite person, you're not some replacement, you're you! You're my player 2-! I'm sorry if I made you feel like you're not as amazing as you are, please don't leave again!"

It wasn't long after his speech he hugged you

Squeezing you tightly as he relished in having you back in real life 3D

since you were gone he kept playing as your game avatars

Using ai set ups to feel like he was with you again in VR

That noble will not stand a chance against his fury

Satan:

He wasn't sure if he was mad at you or himself

It was most likely both - mad you left and let someone just destory so much work and progression in one meeting

But mad at himself for not making you feel secure

He couldn't bring himself to hug you but that was because he was scared he wouldn't let go

"I knew that Noble was nothing but a menace-! You can't listen to people like him, he's just trying to get to you and tear us apart - I don't know why he would do that but he isn't right, he will never EVER be right! You are yourself and never will be Lilith, I didn't get to me her or really know who she was but I do know you will never be her and never were her! I care so much about you and I will make sure to keep my stupid brothers to never make you feel that way again, I've missed you so much (Y/N)."

In the end, he fell into your arms

Holding you tight as he let out his tears of frustration go

You apologized but he just told you to shut up, he didn't want you to be sorry for being the victim

He already had plans on what he's going to do to that noble, trying to push those thoughts away

Focusing on how wonderful it is to have you close

Asmodeus:

As soon as he could reach you, he pulled you into an embrace

Shaking his head as tears streamed down

His makeup already starting to to drip along work his tears

"No! No! No! Noooo!! Don't listen to that horrible noble! He isn't right at all, he doesn't know anything about us or you! He obviously doesn't know how much we care about you and like you as your own person, I never meant to make you feel as if you were some sort of replacement! Lilith was her own being and so are you, your connection means nothing! I i will always be happy knowing my sister got to live the life she wanted but you aren't apart of that, your life is your own and you are nothing like her! I love you because you're you! I couldn't imagine ever loving someone as much as I love you, please come back to the devildom!"

He nuzzled his cheek against yours

Thankful to have you back in his arms again

He didn't like getting his hands messy but no one was going to make you feel that way ever again

He didn't care about that demons status

Beezlebub:

His hand landed on the top of your head

You flinched not expecting such a gentle pat but it only broke his heart more

"That noble knows nothing about you or any of us, he's turned my sister into an enemy to our relationship and I will not let that go on for any longer! You are not her and not her replacement, how dare he make you feel that way! you're apart of my family and I'll have it no other way, I really love you and missed you everyday you were gone - I was scared I'd never feel full again, you make me feel complete and when you disappeared I knew I wouldn't be able to protect you, I would of never forgiven myself if you got hurt! I want to always be able to protect you and have you by my side and make you feel happy - I promise I won't fail you again."

He almost fell to his knees once he was done

He was ready to swear to you on one knee, like a true knight

But instead hugged you

Mindful not to squeeze too hard but let himself be selfish and hold you tighter than he would normally dare to

He was one prone to be violent unless it was in sports or he was starved - the Noble starved him of your touch and kindness

He'll break more than just rooms once he gets his hands on that Noble

Belphegor:

He spun you to face him

Demanding

Needing your attention on him

It was only a few days but it felt like forever since he's had your eyes on him

"You're no pawn and no replacement, you are you and that's all I want, I don't want any one else, I know I've made you feel like a replacement - i did something horrible to you and then tried to make it seem like it was all okay after, I'm always trying to make up for that day but I know that is something that will always effect us! I missed you so much....you are your own person and you've helped me be a better person, come back home and let me make this right......you're all I want and need."

He broke down crying

Hanging his head low and it dropped onto your shoulder

He loosely held your waist whilst you gripped onto him tight

If everyone thought choking you was bad, just wait until they see what he plans to do with that noble

He couldn't stand seeing you so upset anymore

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

He gently held your arm

Giving it a small squeeze as tears built up

"He said all that? I'm sorry he made you feel like that, to feel such confliction and dread, You are never will be or were my pawn, you're a fantastic student and wonderful person who's did more than I've ever imagined Someone could do, if I could have asked you myself properly to be apart of the exchange program I would of but the world is not yet ready to merge and be aware of our existence.... please you have my deepest apologies and regrets that you felt this way and I've allowed such a person in my court, I will do whatever I can to make this right."

The tears finally fell and he became selfish

Hugging you tight against him, his fingers brushing against any skin he could touch

He couldn't dare to think how he'll be when you finally do leave the program

But until that time comes he needed to make it a good experience for you

If what barbatos did to him wasn't enough to convince him then he will not go back on his word

He'll fix this and do whatever he can to make all the pain stop

Barbatos:

He sighed in relief seeing you in the flesh

Knees buckling as he stood before you

His knuckles bloodied and bruised under his gloves

"I should of been more comforting when I found you, if I had known that was what he said I would of never let him be apart of the lord's court or be at that party, believe me when I say you are not a pawn or someone's replacement - you are so much more than that, you are you and someone that's made me feel closer to the present, to act quicker and stop using endless time as a excuse, I will fix this and make him regret ever uttering a word to you, I promise you."

Your touch was as gentle as ever

He caved, leaning against you

Happy to be able to make amends and fix the situation

The nobles dealt with him once and no matter what he did it wasn't enough

But he was merely holding back to be a gentleman, even if that noble now looks like a beaten raisin

It seemed he will have to do much worse to send everyone's message across

Solomon:

His face was gentle yet scolding

He gently brushed your cheek, wiping away a stray tear

"don't run off next time something like this happens, your life is so short and I hate to think would could happen if I lost you because you felt isolated even from me, you though you could find solace as both of us are humans but I was slow to understand your needs - you are deeply loved by everyone, I envy how much love you get and that's why I can't stand to see you run! I also love you and your presence, you have been so kind to me and I still have so much to teach you- please believe me when I say you're no one's pawn or replacement, you're important because you're you."

You crumbled completely

He hugged you as you apologized, calling yourself an idioit

But it only made him tsk, rubbing your back as he filled your ears with praises

He was sure the demons were going to rip that Noble to shreds but he couldn't help but desire his own revenge

Seeing you like this hurt him so much

Simeon:

He was so quick and gentle you could of mistaken him as a feather

He embraced you, cradling your head and rubbed soothing circles between your shoulder blades

"I was worried about you, I took you home and then I learn you've completely disappeared! No warning or note behind, you ran away - your feelings are extremely valid and I understand why you did this, It must of been so conflicting and you needed space to think and reflect, you're so strong (Y/N)! but you are also smarter than this, I feel ashamed knowing I haven't showed you how much I appreciate you being in my life and make sure you feel secure in the Devildom, I want to look over you but I've failed you already, that Noble does not know what he's talking about regardless of the information he has! I would never let anyone use you or let anyone treat you as some replacement, we all care so much about you."

He slightly swayed with you in his arms

Overwhelmed by his fears and the emotions that were rushing through him

He promised to never harm an innocent soul

That noble did not have one

He will leave the more physically destructive rage to the others

Wanting to merely talk and show the noble the error of his ways

Bonus:

You were back in the Devildom, Everyone was making sure to spend extra time with you. So happy to have you back and wanting to work on making you feel more secure. You couldn't stop how fast your heart was beating from all the overwhelming joy you felt.

It felt so good to be back. But you nagging worry remained in your head; what was going to happen to the Noble? you wished you could go up to him and yell at him. Prove him wrong and make him regret ever making you spiral like that.

When you brought up the idea, the men all looked at each other. A knowing look in their eye.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N) but I think it's best you don't see him but rest assured, we've dealt with him on your behalf and understand your wishes - let us know how we can help you feel resolved from that situation if this is unsatisfactory."

Diavolo answered. If it weren't the state the noble was in they'd happily let you chew him out but your heart and mind have been through enough already. No need to add on to the hurt with seeing what was left of him. They couldn't stand to see you upset again.

But you agreed, thanking them for their support and handling the situation. Unaware of their true actions. They all wished you a great day before going back to their own private meeting.

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yostresswritinggirl · 4 years ago

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Do you do poly ships? :0 if not feel free to do these two characters separately lol May I get some hcs of Zhongli and Venti on a picnic date with the reader? Just a quiet day in the sun where the Archons can relax for a moment and watch the world go by :D (if you wanna insert some angst maybe they suddenly realize this moment is fleeting bc reader is mortal and won't be with them forever?? Up to you lol 👀) thank you in advance!!!

I actually don't :D kidding ahahah

What I meant to say was that I haven't wrote anything related to poly relationship before so this a cool, first experience for me! And like the dumbass that I am, I took on this request and butchered the heck outta it. Welcome to "A Day In The Life Loving Two Broke Gods"-

Rendezvous with the Gods

Picnic Scenario with Poly!Venti, Zhongli, and You

Background!

It's pretty WACK how you got two of the seven archons to be interested in you in a romantic level.

But I can imagine that the thing that attracted them the most to you is your sense of humanity. As ex-archons, what they needed now is a sense of normalcy and a grasp on reality, and with your knowledge and presence they've come to realize the ways of the mortals fairly easily.

But like, you got the two oldest archons in existence. Even the Traveler is in disbelief at this turn of events.

I think you somehow ended up in this situation when the two of them had a reunion after their retirement, and the conversation went like this: "Have you heard of the fair maiden, (Y/N)? Their existence greatly reminds me of Celestia!" "I had the honor of meeting them yes, how tantalizing they are, even the slightest sight of them invigorates me through the whole day."

They'd shower you with praises among one another, and you're forced to sneeze for an hour straight somewhere in Teyvat.

Preparation!

*wheeze*

First thing I thought was "How probable is it that Venti drinks Dandelion Wine at 4 in the afternoon?"

The answer is yes.

You three have planned this picnic days ahead, maybe even a week. As all of you have your own work and errands to deal with, probably not Venti tho, a gathering of this magnitude that requires you three to be present for hours are not as common as you'd think.

First order of business: location! The most obvious answer would have been Starsnatch Cliff, Windrise or even Dihua Marsh.

While thinking, Venti and Zhongli ended up sharing a look, and suddenly the location was settled.

No, you don't know where it is, and they tell you that they'll handle it.

You don't have to worry.

You are very worried.

Next, the food! Being in a relationship with two broke Gods made you the alpha in terms of Mora, and on this occasion, you're once again forced to put your foot down and provide.

With that in mind, both of them could only offer a guilty smile and a nervous laugh.

The outcome of your meal depends on your cooking skills really: if you're good or decent, what a heart-warming picnic that would be.

They must have tasted your cooking before so they would ask for requests on your delicious home cooking —

something light that goes with tea, said Zhongli.

something meaty and heavy to pair with wine, said Venti.

It's a wonder how you deal with these two together.

If you're absolutely terrible at cooking, like Suspicious Dish™ rating, you're gonna have to rely on your Mora to get takeout for this date.

Everything else you've pretty much wrapped up quickly, all you have to do now is wait.

Picnic Time!

Venti was the one to pick you up from your housing to guide you to the location, greeting you with a chaste kiss on the cheek before aiming for the picnic basket hanging by your elbow.

You don't let him; he might eat it on the way there honestly

Cute boy is practically shaking with excitement as he hauls you up over a cliff face and carefully nyoom! over the sea

Where is he taking you?

You didn't dwell much longer when you saw a small island in the distance, a rock formation by the edge and most notably, you're tall lover standing next to an elegant patterned brown and gold blanket placed over the sea of flora.

Welcome to Heart Island!

Very cheesy

The Geo archon greets you with a kiss on the hand before being tackled to the ground by a buzzing Venti.

How that was physically possible was beyond you-

You set up and laid down all the food you got for today's picnic: Fresh apples, 'Breakfast' Sandwich, Chicken and Mushroom Skewers!

You've also noticed a picnic basket to the side that wasn't yours. Noticing your stare, Zhongli pulled out his contributions: Mora Meat, a pitcher of Iced Tea, and a bowl of Mushroom Stew.

Out of nowhere, Venti manifests his own offerings to the table: Apples, Dandelion Wine and Mondstadt Hash Browns.

You have no idea how these two managed to prepare or afford such meals but you appreciate it nonetheless.

They had the whole week to save up Mora just for this picnic, how cute aww

The first to take a bite is Venti, defo. You and Zhongli would be prepping the utensils while the Anemo boy sneaks some food into his mouth, even if you smack his hand multiple times, he's not gonna relent.

A lot of catching up happens in this picnic: your wild commissions, Venti's recent performances, Zhongli's uh consultant stuff.

These are the rare moments where Zhongli isn't the one filling up the conversation more, satisfied with hearing the voices of his lovers and listening to their joys or woes.

The whole picnic is accompanied by Venti's lyre, strumming softly, unrelenting, to make sure all of you are enjoying the serenity of the island.

You and Zhongli take turns spoon feeding him cuz he just won't stop PLAYING

Zhongli made the Iced Tea

Very refreshing, right amount of sweet, would honestly be a good alternative for Venti's alcoholism

Speaking of, he's tipsy now

He's on a full-blown performance now, serenading and urging you two into a dance after eating "to digest the food faster"

Not really believable but you danced anyways.

Zhongli would decline first as he starts cleaning up

But give him a little more nudge, pull on his hand, he'll crave eventually

Rex Lapis is actually a pretty decent dancer

HAVE YOU SEEN HOW GRACEFUL HE DROP KICKS HIS SPEAR

Such a relaxing day off the three of you deserve

By the time the sun already dipped the horizon and you guys still had time to spare, you and Venti would be dozing off on the blanket while leaving the few remaining clean up to Zhongli. It was a tiring yet enjoyable day that's deserving of a nice and dreamy nap.

"Morax..." He'd hear an uncharacteristically somber voice as he makes his way over to where you both lay. Your back resting on the Anemo archon's chest as he spoons you. His teal eyes stare unmoving at your open palm of which the Geo archon takes into his as he sits down.

Little cuts litter your rough hands, from your adventures, some fresh from today to prepare your dishes. How frail and sensitive mortal hands are.

"I'll miss them, so so much." Venti confessed as his grip around you tightens, free-flowing tears erupt from his eyes that are unfocused, as if he was years away with that thousand yards stare that the other God had familiarized himself with.

For the second time in his whole lifetime, Rex Lapis found himself at a loss for words.

------

"Ohhh, a luxurious chest! What's it doing so far out here?" The Traveler lets the floating companion ramble as they pull the chest open, excited for the new artifacts they'll come by.

A teal goblet with gold accents worn out through the years from disuse as parts of its paint are chipped off as gray splotches, laid perfectly in the middle of a brown wool blanket with intricate gold and silver geometric patterns. On each side lays an Anemoculus and Geoculus, softly glowing yet dimming in pulses.

They pick it up with utmost care for safe-keeping, to ask for their archon friends in the future. Who knows, it might be the closure they needed.

This took some time and a lot of pondering wow! This is even more chaotic than the Albedo one ahahah I've made myself sad just thinking about this— anyways thank you so much for requesting and your lovely support! Please let our archon bbs be happy ywy

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justfor2am · 2 years ago

Note

2-8, 16, 17, 23, 26, 29, 37, 47, 49, + 50 for the ask game 4 writers or whatever the name is? u rbed it like .5 hours ago i think n i was gna send questions when u originally did but ive had a shit day so i didn't get to until now 😓 don't feel pressured to do them all btw since theres a lot of them!! n also for any of them w specific fics feel free to do whatever fic u want :3

HELLO you are my favorite ever. actually. omg. i hope you feel better soon, i answered all of them btw so i hope this helps

2 not rpf, not beta read, angst, hurt/comfort, yeah that all tracks 100%

3 touching…. big on non-verbal communication acting as whole conversations, big on flowery language (i'm trying to cut back so as to not seem pretentious lol) also scarian. i just wanna write about scarian. they are my everything i must put them into every scenario ever.

4 in 7th Sense how i named all the andriods. scar is GT-2319, numerical code for GTWS. doc, pearl and ren all have similar naming themes lol

5 i'll befriend you in reverse, why the hell is scar stuck in the woods? despite being a powerful fae, he can't leave the enchanted woods, they're like a physical part of himself that has its own sentience and desires. essentially, a deal he made when he was young turned sour, and now the forest follows him everywhere. the woods want scar to live as long as possible, because he's what keeps the woods alive.

6 so soon enough, you'll find you never knew me at all this fic could be seen as a companion to another i wrote, where grian's the second ever Watcher to be "born" and not "chosen". the "void" scar sees in grian? it's a Watcher-side effect.

7 a million dreams for the world we're gonna make, again lmao. this was my first ever HC fic, and i sometimes find myself thinking about that lonely citadel grian's floating on in the middle of the void, akin to a giant bird cage for him to grow up in, alone.

8 It's Never Enough by we are the dirt, i'm really tired rn but i'd be happy to go into why this BANGS if you'd like tmmr

16 idk if you can tell, but i am in fact an enjoyer of actor au!s. give me more, actually.

17 this is a fic i've been TRYING to write but chapter 2 eludes me still: grian's an avian in a world that fears and despises hybrids, he grew up raised by vexes because the rest of his nestmates and mother were slaughtered before he was born, he grows up causing minor problems for human villages to pass the time until he's eventually caught by a trapper, scar. here's chapter one

scar's a vex hybrid himself, but hides it in order to scam his way through life. grian, trapped, is now at the mercy of a mad scientist who, in his desire to quell society's fear of hybrids, wants to dissect him. grian blackmails scar into helping him stay alive and tries to escape, eventually the two finding common ground.

oh, also mumbo's the mad scientist. he makes dioramas of mobs and decorates his lab with them for fun.

23 honestly, a proper superhero au. at least a one shot, but specifically for the romantic tension.

26 no dialogue, easy. honestly i kinda wanna write one with no dialogue just as a challenge.

29 i made a couple of playlists for my actor au, here's some notable songs from grian's and scars':

grian: Don't Assume What You Don't Know by Grace VanderWaal jealousy, jealousy by Olivia Rodrigo You Stupid Bitch by girl in red

scar: SCOOP by Lil Nas X feat. Doja Cat Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High by Arctic Monkeys Boyfriend by Dove Cameron

(again, very sleep, happy to go into more detail later)

37 skeleton is the best fucking fic i've ever written and i will forever stand by that. yes it's short. yes it's a one-shot. please don't let that deter you, it's the best scar characterization i've ever done in my life. read it. please.

47 though i've closed my eyes, i know who you pretend i am is a pair of steel-toed boots. once perfectly shined and polished, a seemingly important royal crest stamped on the outer skin of the tongue, but the silver has seen better days, worn down from exposure to the elements. still, they are well loved, the original, now somewhat ratty laces tied in double knots, a bow on each shoe still low enough to threaten tripping. these shoes are still in continual use, despite being told a fancier pair would be a smarter choice. no, he quite liked these ones, thank you very much.

49 i'm meant to be working on chapter 19 of my actor au, butttt i've not started so have some bullshit i just came up with instead:

The pair had set up rules for a good reason.

"You're staring again."

One of them had a inclination towards a poor memory.

"Is that a crime?"

Grian could only hope Scar would try and remember.

"It's about to be."

50, answering 25 as a cheeky bonus: https://www.onelook.com/ is a GODSEND. the thesaurus page? heavenly.

[got a question?]

#justfor2am #justfor2talks #long post

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folkloreguk · 4 years ago

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❥ My Sweet Evil Heart (C.Chanhee)

A/N: I wrote this as part of an angel/demon collab for The Boyz! You can find the masterlist HERE. This was really fun to write and I got to live out my alternate universe dream in which I'm a detective...I hope you like it, I'm always welcome to any form of feedback!

genre: demon!Chanhee, detective!reader, angst, fluff, reader is constantly sleep deprived, Chanhee is the sweetest demon ever

synopsis: You, a highly respected detective in your department, are investigating a case of a very strange demon who seems hesitant to do evil...but can you trust someone who is supposed to be the personification of wickedness?

words: ~ 10.6k

Have you ever met someone deeply unhappy? Someone who seems to, at all times, be fighting a war inside of themselves? Have you ever felt empathy for somebody, even though they tested you, over and over, as if the worst part inside of them was trying to make them lose you on purpose? Did you hold on and never stop believing in them? Or did you say something to drive them away, making them think they would only hurt you in the process of you trying to make them see clearer?

This is the story of a demon, whose every cell demurred at his evil nature. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves and start with the basics.

Being one of the head detectives at the local police station was not an easy-going, nor an amusing job. Whilst working on serious cases, lacking proper sleep was not an uncommon occurrence for you, and in some instances, self-care came up short until the mystery had been solved and the guilty ones were locked away. Every case pulled you in and swallowed you whole, keeping you deeply invested for days and nights until your brain felt like it had turned to mush and your body worked on autopilot, until you functioned a little like a highly intelligent zombie. And yet, you couldn’t imagine yourself doing anything else in your life. The thrill was close to an obsession, and seeing justice being served thanks to your work was more addicting than any drug could ever be to you.

Most crimes in your world were committed by demons, of course. They were your worst enemies, the monsters you saw in your nightmares and the reason you never strolled down a street without a gun by your hip. It wasn’t forbidden for them to walk the earth, so long as they kept to themselves. Their evil nature made it almost impossible for them to uphold these terms, though. You wished you could lock them all away in some putrid prison cell, or better yet, send them back to where they crawled out from originally. But the law couldn’t convict beings before they had done anything wrong. So, it was on you to make sure you kept an eye on the sinister beings, figure out what they were up to and stop them before they could actually hurt somebody. Like that morning, when you were called to a liquor store to investigate a break-in.

“My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N, I am the lead investigator,” you greeted the store owner with a handshake upon arrival. “Can you tell me exactly what happened?”

“I came here this morning at around 7 to open up the store. When I got out of my car, I saw the broken glass of the window,” he explained.

“What was taken from inside the store?” you inquired further.

“That’s the weird thing. Nothing is missing from inside,” he said.

“We might just be dealing with vandalism,” you thought out loud. “Do you have security cameras?”

He did, and so you went along with him to the back of the store. It was true, the interior of the shop seemed completely untouched. You suspected whoever had done this had never even intentioned on entering. There was a college campus not too far from the store, and you recalled countless times you had witnessed careless vandalism done by some intoxicated students during a Friday night. It was a very human-like crime. Demons weren’t known to do things by halves. Their crimes were usually the go-big-or-go-home-type of crimes. But then, when you watched the security footage, you were stunned.

At precisely 3:29 am, a dark figure appeared in front of the window. They lifted their arms, swinging a baseball bat against the glass. And against your speculation, they did climb through the hole in the window. With no mask or disguise whatsoever, the demon man looked right into the camera in the corner of the room. The abyss of darkness in his pitch black eyes was unmistakable. He looked around, as if he was debating on whether he should have done more, but then, to your utter confusion, spun around on his heel and climbed right back out the window.

You assured the store owner you would be looking into this case. With nothing left to do, you headed back to the police station. You had taken the security footage with you, and the moment you arrived in your office, you played it on your computer screen. Over and over - only puzzling you more, with each rerun you saw. You worried this might only be a warning. Not seldom had you been a witness to demons playing with their prey, feeding off the fear of innocent souls. Was this one indulging in one of those little twisted games? Right away, you uploaded the demon’s face onto the database for criminals, even if vandalism didn’t compare to the serious allegations that stood against other faces on that list. While you turned your attention to other cases, his features wouldn’t leave your mind. Even when you left your office at night, he was still the most prominent person in your memory.

By the time you began your walk to your home, the sun had disappeared. You couldn’t help it, even if technically you could finish work earlier, your desire to solve your assigned cases was always higher. Had you just walked home at 5 pm, you were sure to end up on your computer at home, researching and digging around on the web to discover possible clues. This way, at least you had all resources you would need at your office at the police station.

Now, in the dark, the streets were rather abandoned, most shops had already closed, and the moon dimly cast light through the clouds. Those conditions were what made it a breeze for you to notice your shadow. The figure had been following you for 5 minutes now. Judging by how carelessly loud their steps sounded and by their not-so subtle choices of hiding spots, you could tell this wasn’t something they had practice in. Purposely, you didn’t turn around, so they wouldn’t realize you had caught on to them a while ago. Instead, only a minute or so from your home, you took a turn left into an abandoned alleyway. Your hand was on the gun in your belt.

Just as you had stepped into the alley, you turned. He was right behind you. With dark orbs glaring and teeth snarling he came at you, knife in hand. Your eyes widened – you recalled his face vividly – as you took in the situation in the blink of an eye. After all, you had watched the security tape of him breaking into the liquor store countless times only hours ago. But you had the upper hand from the very moment you had spun around. His build wasn’t particularly strong, but you knew you should never underestimate demons. You grabbed his shoulders and along with him, your body crashed against the red brick wall to your left. He struggled against your grip, but his determined and feisty expression was the by far the most intimidating part about him. His face was inches from yours but looking into the sort of darkness that were demon’s eyes did nothing to you. Your hand was around his wrist with the knife – which he was aggressively trying to bring down on you – but only at first.

Because suddenly, something uncommon occurred. So uncommon, in fact, that not a single cell in your body could believe it. He willingly dropped the blade. It hit the asphalt, the metallic sound echoing in your ears. He relaxed his arm in your iron grip. Demons never gave up. They fought until you had forcefully brought them to the ground or done worse to them. Their ironic god-complex and evilness didn’t allow them to step away from a fight – until this one had come along, apparently. And then, as if his behavior hadn’t already stunned you enough, he did the unthinkable.

“I’m sorry,” he said. Without a doubt you thought you had misheard him. Swiftly, you pulled your gun out of your belt and pointed it at his face. One thing you knew. You weren’t going to play along in his little games. In panic, he rose his hands, showing defeat.

“Quit playing games, devil’s son,” you hissed. “What is it you’re trying to achieve here? You’re sorry? For what?”

He was hesitant. With every second, your curiosity only grew. Either, he was a skilled actor or…you had no idea what else it could’ve been about him.

“I almost killed you. That’s what I’m sorry for,” he said. “Does that get me a prison sentence?”

Your eye twitched because this didn’t seem right at all.

“You broke into a shop and attacked me, but then stopped out of your free will,” you assessed the situation. “You’ll most likely get away with a fine and your name in our register.”

If you had been awaiting an evil grin or any sort of enjoyment in his face, you’d be waiting endlessly. If anything, he seemed to be…disappointed?

“But you’re a cop, right?” he said. “You can lock me up, can’t you?”

“Didn’t you hear what I said? You won’t be locked up if you don’t commit a crime severe enough. As much as I hate it, considering you demons are running free, it’s the law,” you said.

“You don’t get it,” he said. And he was right, you really had no idea. “I should be locked up. You need to get me to jail before I hurt somebody.”

His face was dead serious, but you didn’t want to believe a single word. How could you, when your daily life consisted of hunting down his kind, because all they brought upon the earth was chaos and death?

“Give me one good reason why I should believe you,” you said, unimpressed.

“I will tell you anything you want to hear,” he said. “If you bring me to a police station. You guys have these lie detectors, don’t you? I will take a test if that’s what it takes for you to believe me.”

So, that was how half an hour later you still hadn’t returned at home, but rather found yourself back at the police station. Almost everyone had gone home by now, so you took the liberty to choose the biggest interrogation room available. A few minutes and he was sitting in front of you, hands in handcuffs and his body connected to the lie detector.

“Okay, here’s how this works. I’ll start by asking some simple questions, and then we’ll get to the bottom of whatever your intentions are,” you explained.

“Alright. Go ahead,” he said. This was your first time seeing a demon take this sort of test. Usually, you couldn’t be bothered because you knew all they did was lie whilst smiling you in the face.

“What’s your name?”

“Choi Chanhee.”

“Where were you born?”

“In hell.”

“Did you break into a liquor store last night?”

“Yes.”

“Did you intend on killing me tonight?”

“…Yes.”

“Is that your definite answer?”

“…No.”

“How come both of your last two answers are lies?” you asked. “You didn’t intend on killing me, but yes is your definite answer?”

“I can’t stop the evil in me but I’m trying,” he said. You were stunned. The answer was the most truthful of them all.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“I was never like the others since I came to earth. I’ve never felt a rush like they do, causing mischief and hurting humans. I don’t belong. It’s as if there was a demon inside of me, but it’s not controlling all of me, do you understand?” he said.

“I’m not sure, but go on,” you said.

“I don’t want to hurt anybody or destroy things. But on some days, I’m walking down the street and my body starts following the devil’s orders instead. I usually snap out of it quickly and stop myself. That’s why you’re still alive,” he explained.

“You’re telling me you’re some sort of good demon?” you asked. “Why don’t you go back to hell, if you’re struggling so much on earth?”

“I hate it there,” he said. “And either way, I’m banned from there forever.”

Your head raised as you stared at him.

“Banned?” you asked.

“I stopped a bunch of demons from killing a woman once,” he said. “Safe to say they weren’t happy to hear that, back at home. I couldn’t go back, even if I wanted to.”

“Can you tell me the name of the woman?” you asked. And he did. All this time, he really had been telling the truth. When you searched up the woman’s name in the computer, it only confirmed your suspicion. She really had been under attack when an unidentified person had interrupted and saved her life.

“I can tell you names of demons,” he said. “If you do me the favor of locking me up, I can sell out everyone I know about.”

You massaged the sides of your head and sighed. This guy really was one of a kind.

“I already told you, I can’t put you in jail for something you didn’t do,” you said. “That’s against the law, and then it’ll be me who ends up behind bars instead of you. I’ll have to let you go.”

“What if I mess up?” he said. The amounts of firsts you were experiencing in the timespan of an hour were giving you a headache. Never had you felt compassion for a demon before. But you were only human, and when you noticed the genuine concern and insecurity in his soft voice, you couldn’t stop yourself.

“How long have you been on earth for?” you asked.

“I don’t know, a few years, I guess?” he said.

“And in those few years, which of your deeds would you rate the most criminal out of all?” you asked. Any other demon would have been able to give you multiple answers, one more vicious than the other. He, on the other hand, took his time and even when he answered, he didn’t sound at all sure.

“I’ve broken into a house before, destroyed a car window and one time I stole a dog,” he confessed with his head tilted towards the floor.

“What happened to the dog?”

“I…gave it back,” he said. A laughter erupted from your throat against your will. In a friendly manner, you pat his shoulder before retrieving the keys to his handcuffs.

“Trust me, you’ll be just fine out there,” you said. “Whatever it is you’re doing to stop yourself from being evil, it’s working. I will let you go now."

Even though he wasn’t happy with your answer, he knew he had no choice but to comply. As you walked him through the hallways towards the exit of the station, you could only think of one thing: your beloved bed. Not only your body but especially your brain was drained from energy. You desperately needed a refill by getting a good night’s sleep.

“You’re the first person who’s been really kind to me,” he said, as you held the door open for him. The night air was cool, and you quickly zipped up your jacket to your chin.

“You gave me no reason not to be,” you replied.

“I almost stabbed you,” he said, bluntly.

“Almost.”

“For most people, me being a demon is reason enough to loathe me.”

“Well I guess I’m not most people,” you said. His smile was gentle, but his black eyes would always give him away. “I’ll be here at the station every day, if you have any concerns or need somebody to consult. But right now, all I want is my bed.”

“I understand,” he replied. “Thank you. Goodbye.”

“Good night,” you said, before you parted ways. Once more, you journeyed home. He remained on your mind until the moment you slipped off to dreamland that night.

The days passed without a trace of him. You followed your routine, but one thing you couldn’t help. You simply had to tell every person who worked with you about the changed demon you had met. No one really wanted to believe you. It was kind of understandable. Some thought you were testing their skills, seeing if they could figure out you were lying. Others went as far as to suspect your lack of sleep had given you hallucinations. But you didn’t let it go. And after all, you were a highly respected member of the police force. Some said they wanted to meet this demon gentleman, as they had renamed him.

But then you were called to a brand new homicide investigation and all of the jokes at the station were blown away by the intensity and buzz the case brought with it. You had a murder to solve. There was no place for sweet demon men in any part of your brain. Not for now. And as always, you slipped into old habits – staying up all night, living on coffee and quick meals – the toxic behavior was almost inescapable. Your fellow detectives tried their best to keep you healthy and most importantly, sane. They took you with them to get salad for lunch, invited you over for game nights (a futile attempt at giving you a break) and told you to go to sleep on time. After all, they needed your brain to function at full capacity for the case. You knew people were relying on your knowledge, and you weren’t doubting your capabilities. But a highly intelligent zombie was still a zombie. And so it happened that one Thursday night your boss sent you home. Not because you weren’t doing a good job – rather for of the opposite reason.

“You are allowed back at the station when you’ve caught a full night’s sleep. Do what it takes to take care of yourself,” your boss had said. Her tone displayed as much strictness as her eyes showed concern. Truth be told, you were too exhausted to even argue against her order. That’s when you knew. You really needed a rest. You dragged your body home.

“Hello sweetheart,” you greeted your pet bird, who chirped excitedly when you set foot into your apartment. “Guess what. I’m home early.”

As much as you wanted to drop into a slumber right away, your stomach growled. And you weren’t in the mood to wake up half-starved. As you prepared some left-overs from the fridge, you heard your bird call from the living room. “Peek-a-boo!” he sang. It caught your attention. He only played this game with you – when you were outside in your small garden and he was watching you through the window. So who exactly was he talking to, now?

You picked up a knife, because as a detective it was practically your job to be paranoid, and tiptoed into the living room. It would be harder for an intruder to spot you in the dark, so you pushed the light switch. Slowly, you advanced to the window and gently pulled the curtains aside. A shiver ran down your spine when you saw the figure standing between the trees. They didn’t seem to be hiding, if anything they were lazily resting their back against the garden fence. Maybe they weren’t aware you were watching them. Bold of them to assume they could intimidate you by acting so nonchalant. You cracked the window open slightly.

“If you don’t leave my property within the next ten seconds, I’ll have you arrested for trespassing,” you announced. The figure flinched. The moment he stepped into the moonlight and raised his arms, you remembered his face.

“Choi Chanhee?” You opened the terrasse door and stepped outside.

“Are you going to hurt me?” he asked, eyes glued to the knife in your hands. Quickly, you lowered your hand.

“What are you doing here?” you asked instead of answering his question.

“I didn’t know where else to go,” he admitted.

“And so you thought creeping around in a police woman’s backyard was an appropriate thing to do? Wait…have you been stalking me?” you asked. You should have cut back on the sharp tone, but you felt half-asleep and this was the last thing you needed. Plus, the immanent realization hit you, that you had not noticed him at all. You had been so caught up in your work that you had not recognized a demon lingering around your home address, watching you. It hurt your pride a little – and could have ended very differently, had it been a more malovent demon than the one standing in front of you. This one looked terrified, kneading his hands nervously.

“I thought you wouldn’t be upset with me…that maybe you would understand. Because you’ve been the only one who’s listened to me. I’m just trying to find a purpose,” he said, “And my head tells me you’re the right direction.”

Demons. They’ve always had a fondness for the dramatic. But his words tore at your heart strings. His behavior resembled a child who had done wrong and was in the process of being scolded.

“Do you have no home?” you asked, softening your voice.

“I’ve lived with other demons. But they don’t want me there, anymore,” he said. For obvious reasons, you thought. Your head was racing. There was no way you could leave him standing there in the cold. But letting a demon into your home sounded like you must have had a death wish. It’s not like you didn’t have enough space, though. With an extra guest bedroom that nobody had ever used before, he would be just fine. There was no excuse. You cursed your parents for making you get a bigger apartment “In case you got married and had children soon.” You never know what could happen, they had said. And how wrong they had been, but how right they had been on that last part.

“Would you say you’re a tidy person?” you asked. A gigantic yawn came over you, and once again your stomach grumbled.

“What? I mean…I think so?” he said.

“Are you hungry?” You were in disbelief. Maybe it was the zombie in you that had a heart so soft, it took pity on a demon.

“I’m starving,” he said.

And that was how you came to have dinner with a demon. Spoiler alert: It wouldn’t be the last time. You ate quietly, trying hard to fight tiredness but it was no use. Afterwards, you showed him the room he could stay in.

“How do I make this up to you?” he asked.

“We’ll think about that another time, alright?” you said, “I need to sleep now. I’ve got an unsolved murder case waiting on me tomorrow.”

That night, you locked your bedroom door and slept with your gun on your nightstand. Just in case. Even though you were almost fully convinced the demon in the bedroom across the hall was more harmless than a five-year-old, he was still a demon.

When you woke up and saw your boss’ message on your phone, you couldn’t believe it. She wanted you to stay at home for the day. Apparently, you needed the rest and she had no interest in getting into trouble for overworking you (which she obviously wasn’t, you were the one doing this to yourself). When you walked down the stairs, you had almost forgotten about the previous night. It felt a little like it had all just been one wild fever dream – that was, until you spotted the demon sitting on your sofa, your pet bird on his shoulder.

“I let him out, I hope that was okay,” he said. You were dumbfounded. “Listen, I just wanted to say…thank you. Tell me whatever you need me to do and I’ll get it done for you.”

You wanted to go to work. But you knew he would be no help making that possible. Your mind was already wandering off to your case, the tips of your fingers burning with anticipation to search the internet for clues. Your grumbling belly interrupted your eagerness.

“Um…you could go to the grocery store for me?” you asked.

You went back to work the next day. Unsure of what to do, you decided to keep your demon housemate a secret for now. The other detectives would have probably written you off as insane, and you needed them to take you seriously. To be fair, maybe you were a little crazy. But he had been really good on the first day. Only one incident, which involved him dropping an egg on the kitchen floor, stood out to you. Of course, that could happen to anyone. But any other person would not have apologized in the way that he did. Normal people wouldn’t have acted so guilty, had it been an accident. But as long as his malice remained to that extent, you could live with it. You almost laughed at the idea of him purposely watching the egg roll off the counter and not doing anything.

He sure was strange. But little did you know, his egg-dropping shananigans were only the beginning of his uncontrollable little pranks he would pull on you.

Once he let your bird fly out the window. When you came home you discovered him outside, talking to your bird, begging him to come back inside. Little did he know, all it took was a whistle and a few treats and you had him sitting on your shoulder, ready to go back inside. One night you returned home to find him staring at the ceiling in the dining room, a kitchen towel in his hand. When you asked him what he was trying to achieve there, he told you there was a mosquito sitting above him.

“So, why don’t you kill it?” you asked. He looked shocked.

“Kill it?” he asked, “We should probably just shoo it outside.”

That’s when you knew. Choi Chanhee wouldn’t hurt a fly. Literally. All those times you had worried about leaving him home alone with your bird vanished in an instant as you laughed.

“You’re right. Killing is one of the worst sins. But sometimes, especially when it comes to mosquitoes, you don’t need to worry about any consequences. If anything, I’ll be grateful,” you assured him.

Another instance made you think maybe you had been too quick to judge him as harmless. When you walked into your bathroom in the morning, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you almost jumped out of your skin. A red substance stuck to your mirror in what seemed to be random shapes. On impulse, you called his name. On second look, you realized what he had done. The red was merely ketchup, and the random shapes weren’t so random, but they spelled “meeting at 2 pm”. When Chanhee appeared in the doorframe, he already wore his sorry expression.

“What did you think you were doing here?” you said. “You know where the post-it notes are!”

“I- He- The demon in me wanted to scare you…I’m so sorry,” he said. It was difficult to be mad at him when he was so sweet. You had, after all, told him to remind you of your meeting you had that day. He was so easy to forgive, too. Whenever he went to buy groceries, he returned with a bouquet of flowers, and after he had figured out your favorite candy, he made sure you never ran out of your supply. You liked being alone, but suddenly it felt nice to have someone waiting for you at home. A warm sensation filled your heart whenever he asked you about your day during dinner.

Even if after dinner you had to argue with him as if he was your son, because the demon in him had decided to take on the form of a teenage boy who was too lazy to take out the trash. You were still seated at the table, rolling your eyes at the demon’s horrible attempt at being evil.

“Don’t make me ask you one more time,” you threatened him, although you didn’t know what you would have done had he continued to argue against you. Only when he reached for the knife that he had already put down tidily on his plate, your eyes widened. His knuckles were white around the metal and you leaned back instinctively. Your gun was still in your belt – you had sat down for dinner straight after returning home – but you didn’t want to use it. Not on him.

“Chanhee,” you spoke in a calm tone. His face was unreadable. He wasn’t making eye contact. Instead, his gaze was glued onto the blade in his hand, staring blankly. His eyes blinked, almost robotically. Something changed in his demeanor then. There was a tremble in the hand that was clutching the knife. It grew more uneasy by each passing moment. Your heart was pounding in your chest and you kept your eyes trained on him, trusting your reflexes.

“Fine,” he suddenly said in a grumpy tone. Then he dropped the knife. The metallic sound rang in your ears for seconds afterward. You let out the breath you didn’t know you had been holding on to, as you watched him get up and retrieve the full trash bag from under the sink. You had been sleeping with your bedroom door unlocked for weeks. Even though it pained you, that night you locked your door again.

At 3:28 am you awoke to the sound of breaking glass. You allowed yourself to yawn and rub the sleep out of your eyes for just a moment, then you were on your feet. Gun in hand, you opened your door. Across the hall, the door to Chanhee’s room stood ajar. Light came from downstairs.

“Chanhee?” you called quietly. No answer. But your ears picked up shuffling and the sound of shards of glass being moved around. You approached slowly, trying not to give yourself away. Then you heard the quiet sobs. Your arm with the gun dropped to your side when you stepped into the kitchen.

He was sitting on the floor like he was one of the shattered pieces of glass himself. When he saw you, he flinched and tried to dry away his tears. But it was no use. They kept coming, and you had already seen them either way.

“I dropped it on purpose,” he said, referring to the broken glass. Another sob went through his body, making your chest ache at the sight of him. “I’m sorry.”

“I have nine more of those. It’s alright,” you assured him. Gently, you sat down by his side. You put your arms around his hunched frame. He stiffened at first but calmed his muscles after a moment and let you hold him.

“Shh, it’s okay,” you said. Whatever it was that was hurting him so much, you’d be here to fight it off for him.

“I can’t stop the evil in me,” he cried. His weeps seeped through your skin and tugged at your organs. It felt like a thousand tiny, sharp needles in your heart.

“It’s a part of you. It’ll never fully go away. But look at you, you’re doing such a good job holding it inside of you,” you whispered. He shuddered.

“I tried to kill you,” he stated. “I don’t deserve you. You’re so kind. You do all this for me, and I tried to kill you.”

“But you didn’t,” you said. “And that’s what counts. We all have urges inside of us…but it’s what we end up doing that truly counts and makes us who we are.”

“But it’s so hard,” he cried. His face was in the crook of your neck as he sniffled. The small teardrops that touched your skin felt like ice. “And all I do is bother you. I’m an inconvenience. Why don’t you just lock me up with the other demons? Why give me another chance every time I mess up?”

You couldn’t believe he would hate himself so much. Chanhee had more compassion than a lot of the humans you knew had. Some days he sat and pet your bird for hours just because it made him happy, he always had money on him to give to the homeless people in front of the grocery store and he almost cried thinking he forgot to pay for an item at the store (which you had obviously paid for).

“How could you even compare yourself to other demons?” you said. “If you want, I will take you in to work with me sometime. Then you’ll see the atrocities others commit. Even among humans, you’d still be sorted into the best of the best. I believe in you and that you will do good.”

He only sobbed harder at what you had said, and you felt the need to pull him in just a little tighter. You softly rocked your bodies in an attempt to calm him down.

“I would fall apart without you.” Between the hiccups and tears his words sounded like a broken confession, but that’s why they hit so hard.

“You’re not alone in this. I’m here for you,” you whispered, lips right by his ear. Your hands were in his hair, stroking his head as if you could pour all your emotions into this one gesture. What else could you do to show him you would never abandon him the way his demon people had? And it seemed to do the trick. His fists that had been clutching your shirt loosened up and his sorrowful crying turned into mellow breathing on your skin.

“Aren’t you sleepy?” you asked. “Let’s get you back to sleep. Tomorrow things will be better.”

“I haven’t been able to sleep well for three days,” he said. “But I need to clean this up first.”

He let go of you and started to pick up shards of glass. There was still a haggard expression on him, and his cheeks were painted red and tear stained. And yet he was determined.

“Let me do this,” you said, touching his arm. “You can’t even keep your eyes open. Go to bed, Chanhee.”

This time, he didn’t argue. But his good behavior didn’t stop the apologetic, almost battered look at you. He knew you would be by his side no matter what – but what he needed most was his own forgiveness. And you could tell by the way he spoke about himself that it would take a while until he was ready to accept himself as he was.

You heard his heavy steps on the stairs as he walked to his room. Quickly, you gathered the biggest shards of glass and then used a hand brush to collect the tiny pieces. This wasn’t what you had signed up for when you had taken him in. You thought you’d have to argue with him daily and that you’d miss having your personal space and privacy. You knew it would be new, living with another person after living alone for so long. But nothing could have prepared you for the way Chanhee had swept you off your feet with his adorable charms. You didn’t need to fake excitement when you came home to him, nor did you ever have to force yourself to tell him about your day or have any conversation with him, for that matter. He was truly enchanting with the way he made you care so much. Especially when you had assumed all demons were your sworn enemies.

When you finally dragged your tired body upstairs, you softly pushed open the door to his room, only to see him lying wide awake.

“Can’t sleep?” you asked. “Even though you’re so exhausted?”

“No,” he spoke. Even his voice made no attempt at hiding the sleepiness. His look was pleading. “Can you please stay with me…just for a little while?”

There was no way you could say no to his lovely gaze and messy hair and outstretched arms. So, you crawled in next to him under the covers. Your faces were inches apart. The last time you had been looking into a demon’s eyes this close-up he had been lying face-up and dead on the side of a road. Those eyes had been lifeless, and yet you felt like they had still held so much ferociousness, even in death. Now you only saw concern and genuine care in the black orbs across from you. You admired his softly sculpted face. It was one that seemed like it would much rather belong to an angel.

“You’ve been working so much,” he whispered. “You must be much more tired than me.”

“I’m used to it,” you said, “I enjoy my work because I’m doing it to help others.”

“You’re a good person,” he stated. There was something in his voice you couldn’t make out. Regret? Admiration?Maybe it was both.

“So are you, Chanhee,” you said. Without second thought, you leaned forward and pressed your lips to his cheek. He didn’t flinch nor pull away. Instead, his pretty lips curled into a smile as he closed his eyes, ready to finally drift off to dreamland.

From that night on he seemed to improve a little, day by day. No more breaking things or having to argue about simple house chores. It occurred to you almost as if he had turned into something more human – so much that you dared to take him to work with you. People there had found the idea of your new demon friend strange, and you were sure some would take more than a little convincing to let down their guard around him. You couldn’t blame them for the prejudices – you had once been the same, after all. But Chanhee was okay with it, even when you had explained to him that some people might hate him, just because of his black eyes and what they meant to people. He had lived years of receiving that sort of treatment. Nonetheless, it pained you to think about how used he was to it. It took bravery and thick skin to walk into a police station the way he did that day. He was fascinated, looking behind the scenes. Perhaps you found it amusing how alarmed everyone was when they first laid eyes on him at the station. His ability to turn around their views of his species within twenty seconds or less was nothing but astonishing. He very willingly took it upon himself to walk down to the nearest coffee shop and order ten cups, also earning him the sympathy from the last few sceptics. When you were deep in conversation with another detective, discussing the possible whereabouts of a highly wanted demon, Chanhee suddenly interrupted you.

“I know an underground club where they like to go after…committing crimes,” he said. “Every demon in this city knows about it.”

At that moment you realized his full potential and what good he could really do. That was, if he was ready to sacrifice his people. But he just had – without even blinking. He could be an immense help to you.

“Young man I can see you have a bright future, should you ever decide to join the police force,” said your boss from across the room. Seemed like she had the same idea as you. Chanhee only smiled shyly but couldn’t hide the glint of pride in his eyes.

The following days you instantly made arrangements to get Chanhee an interview with the head of the station. He had been scared, at first.

“What if the other people there hate me?” he suspected.

“They might make assumptions about you in their heads, you know, because you’re a demon. They only know demons to be evil. But the moment they realize how good of a person you are, I promise they’ll change their mind,” you said. “You’ll be precious to us, and if you want to do good, the police is where you can be the most helpful. You’ll change lives, maybe even save people.”

“Yes, I want to help,” he said. “I’m done with my kind.”

“I’ll talk to my boss tomorrow,” you assured him. “If you’re too anxious to come in to the station, maybe she’ll allow you to work from home, from my office here. This is just a try, okay? If you really enjoy this work, you’ll have to learn and earn your badge.”

The way he looked at you filled you with so much pride. He seemed to have found some hope. Like he could finally spend his time in a productive and truly good manner. You couldn’t wait to see how he would do.

A tiring day and many discussions with higher-ups at workplace later, you returned at your home, late at always. Your fingers tingled with excitement and you wanted to yell for Chanhee the moment you walked through your door. You had managed to score an internship for him at your station. He was allowed to start as early as the following week. As you walked up the stairs, following the shuffling noise you heard, you imagined his face when you told him the news. You knew he’d be ecstatic. His smile would make you so happy, and you almost grinned at the mere thought of it. The noises were coming out of your office.

“Hi, Chanhee. Guess what my boss-,” you started. Then you fell speechless. Paper was scattered all over the floor. Drawers stood wide open. The orderly sorted piles of case files you had been working on were dispersed into every corner of the small room. Photos and pieces of paper were falling out of the folders. And in midst of it all stood Chanhee.

“Y/N- I’m so-,” he said, helpless.

“Don’t,” you said. Every ounce of excitement was gone from your voice, replaced by an ice cold tone you didn’t know you had in you. He flinched, but you couldn’t keep in what you had to say. “You’re impossible. I can’t fucking believe this! These are real cases, Chanhee! I’m trying to save real people here! This isn’t some broken mirror or a spilled cup of water. I can look past a shattered glass, but this is too much…I honestly thought you were getting better…”

Somewhere you knew you were being too harsh. But your job was your entire reason for existing. This was your life mission, laid out in front of you as if a hurricane had rampaged through the room. It would take days for you to rearrange the files. You weren’t even sure if you’d be able to find the correct places for each piece of paper.

“I’m sorry,” he said, voice cracking because he was about to cry.

“I don’t want to see you right now. Please get out. I need to clean this up and you can’t help me with this,” you said, trying hard not to scream out of frustration. Your eyes were already scanning the floor. You had no idea where to even start. With low-hanging shoulders and teary eyes that were threatening to spill over, Chanhee slipped past you. He granted you one more look before he scurried out of the office like a frightened animal.

Even though your stomach was grumbling from starvation and you could barely stay awake – as always – you needed to get some of the cleaning done. Now. Or you would go insane. Plus, you needed time away from Chanhee. While you collected the paper from every inch of the wooden floor, guilt slowly started to nag at you. You had never raised your voice at him to this extent. And he was sensitive. It wasn’t his fault, that’s what you always told him when he blamed himself for messing things up. He knew that. You cursed at yourself. How could you be so impulsive? All too well you knew how he felt about his demon half. You were supposed to be there for him, to tell him he was doing a good job and to make sure he didn’t beat himself up. Now you had achieved the complete opposite. A dull ache in your chest accompanied your hungry stomach.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. In a haze, you stepped down the stairs and to the door. You needed to apologize to Chanhee. When you opened the door, a delivery girl from your favorite restaurant stood there, handing you an order. You were puzzled.

“Already payed for,” she checked with a beaming smile, “Enjoy your meal!”

“Thank you,” you said, voice numb. Before you knew it, she had turned on her heel and was on the way back to the car.

“Chanhee! Your food is here,” you shouted, assuming he was the one who had made the order. You got no answer. When you set the bag down on the kitchen table, you saw a note, addressed to you.

Y/N,

Words can’t express how sorry I am about what I’ve done. All my life I only wanted someone to love me. In you, I thought I might have found what I had been searching for all this time. But I messed up. I always do. I drove you away from what we had. I’ve wondered why I always end up disappointing people. Now I know it’s because it’s the only thing I’m truly good at. You deserve someone you can trust blindly, someone who will walk through fire for you, someone who will take a bullet for you. I can’t give you that. I can’t even trust myself. Thank you for giving me a home and for being the most generous person I have ever met. You will always be in my sweet evil heart. Don’t worry about me too much. I will find my way and you will find yours. Who knows, our paths may cross again. I ordered your favorite food. I know you’re always starving when you get home from work. Enjoy it and don’t let it go cold. Make sure you get enough sleep tonight, and don’t forget to take your water bottle with you tomorrow, you left it here this morning.

I’ll hold you in my happiest thoughts forever,

Chanhee

You only snapped out of your motionless state when one single tear dropped down your cheek and onto the note. A heavy blanket of sorrow and regret sunk into your whole body. The emotions seeped through your skin and before you knew it, you were a sobbing mess on the kitchen floor. You wanted to take him in your arms and tell him you forgave him. Hell, you had forgiven him minutes after you had yelled at him. You should have gone to him then. Had you only apologized quickly enough, perhaps he’d still be here. Then he’d be eating dinner with you, and although you’d be frustrated, you both wouldn’t be alone.

Your tears fell into your food while you ate it, unable to control your sadness and frustration you had against yourself. They mixed with the shower water as you stood in silence under the hot stream, overthinking everything. Your pillow was wet from the crying as you struggled to fall asleep. Like a broken-hearted zombie you trudged across the hall and into his room. Chanhee’s covers still smelled like him and you hugged them tightly, as if you could hold a piece of him and bring him back that way. But there was nothing you could have done. He had left, and it was alone your fault.

The next day passed like a vivid fever dream. While you were sat in your meeting, you couldn’t possibly focus on the case your team was discussing. Instead, you pondered whether your makeup was able to conceal your puffy face and the dark circles under your eyes. If it was obvious, at least people didn’t seem to point it out. Maybe they were so used to seeing you tired that it would take a lot more than some tiredness and lack of concentration to arise concern. It was the first time in years you really wanted to go home after work. In fact, you couldn’t stand the laughter and good mood at the police station for one more second. All you wanted to do was scream and cry, and seeing people joke around without any idea about your feelings only intensified your desire. Of course, you could have confided in somebody. But you were afraid they would tell you Serves you right or I told you. You don’t think you’d be able to handle those blatant assumptions and the mocking.

Your plan for the night was set: You’d sit in the bathtub for half an hour, then you’d wrap yourself into a human burrito in a blanket and fill your brain with some brutal movie that would make your life seem like it was mere child’s play. But as most things in your life lately, nothing went as planned. Because after only five minutes in the hot tub, your phone rang on the other side of the room. The first time you ignored it. You really tried. But then it rang again, and you looked up to see the caller ID. It was your boss.

You groaned and quickly stood up, not giving up on the prospects of a peaceful night just yet. But then you heard her message – a break-in at a bank, one dead bank employee, five hostages, a possible shoot out. They were calling for back up. And when there was a chance to throw bad guys behind bars, the most inviting bath or an exciting movie suddenly turned dull.

Not fifteen minutes later you had jumped out the bath, gotten dressed in your uniform, taken your gun and ammunition, and were pulling up at the scene your boss had ordered you to. The bank was in the city center, close to the main square. The police team was stationed in a side street. Some of the team had already been sent to the front of the bank, where the police was attempting to make contact with the robbers.

“They’re holding four hostages in the back of the bank. One of them is at the front, right by the glass doors for us to see. The robbers have guns to their heads. If we come closer, they’ll shoot them,” your colleague informed you.

“Demons?” you asked. Against your will, Chanhee appeared in your mind. You wondered how he was doing. Was he hiding out in somebody else’s garden right now? Had he found a bed to sleep in? Then you quickly shook your head. This was not the time for heavy emotions of any kind.

“Yes. Five of them,” your colleague added. You huffed.

“What do they want us to do? Are they demanding anything?” you asked.

“They want us to let them leave with the money,” she said. You grinned bitterly and nodded.

“What about the back entrance?” you asked. You knew the layout of this bank and had been there multiple times in the past.

“That’s our route. Besides the one at the front, the other demons are inside the bank. The entrance isn’t guarded. A team of four will go to the back and try to sneak up on them. When we have a clear line of fire on all the robbers, we’ll take them out at the same time,” she explained.

“Alright,” you nodded, fixing your bulletproof vest around your upper body. You were ready for this. To others, missions like these would have been nerve-wrecking, and you would have been lying if you said you were completely calm. But the adrenaline was already rushing through your body, and fear was something you hadn’t felt since your very first operation.

“All ready?” your colleague asked the other two members of the team who would go into the bank. You received nods and professional expressions. You had all trained together and were used to functioning like one unit. Sticking close together, you rounded the bank, using a side street so the demons wouldn’t see you approaching. In your ear, the voice of your boss was giving orders and checking in on you. The street was dark and devoid of any life except for your team. Multiple of the surrounding streets had been evacuated and shut off to the public. The scene had something straight out of a heist movie. Except this time, the robbers weren’t going to pull of the perfect theft and get away. You would make sure of it.

“We’re almost there,” you said. “Twenty meters to the entrance. Awaiting permission to go inside.”

“You have permission,” your boss spoke over your earpiece. One last look at your teammates, and you were on the move. Sneaking inside soundlessly was easy. The backrooms were all empty. As you passed abandoned offices, you saw knocked over office equipment and paper scattered on the floors. Lamps had been left on and you heard the faint buzzing of a running computer that was most certainly unoccupied. Moving swiftly, you walked along the corridors, guns pointed ahead at all times. Your teamwork was untouchable. One of you made sure the path was clear, then the rest followed.

“You are one room away from the entry hall,” your boss said.

“Understood,” you answered and slowed down your steps. A cat wouldn’t have been able to walk more silently than you did. Now your ears picked up voices. Somebody was crying. There was shuffling of feet on marble.

“Shut up!” a male voice yelled. The crying faded out into muteness. In the dark, you could make out figures. A few countertops and a good distance separated you and your team from the demons and the hostages. You nodded to your colleagues and they understood. The four of you parted ways, moving into the room and taking shelter behind the bank counters. Once again, you checked the situation. Close to you, four hostages sat on the floor. A woman was still crying, and you could tell she was struggling to keep herself quiet. Around them, four demons stood, dressed in black. Their ski masks kept their faces hidden, but their body languages told you enough. They were not to be messed with. By the far entrance, the fifth demon was positioned with the remaining hostage, and you could spot the police cars outside in the town square. From behind your hiding spots, each of your teammates had a clear line of fire on the demons. The fifth one would be taken out from police outside the bank. You were just about to send a signal to your boss to let her know you were in position. Suddenly, the scraping of feet on the floor alarmed you.

“What was that?” one of the demons barked. The noise had come from your colleague beside you, who was now flinching. You had no time to think. No time to complain about her mistake. If you didn’t act now, they were going to close in on you.

You jumped up, pointing your gun at the closest demon. Right away, the remaining demons had their guns aimed at the hostages’ heads. Your colleagues had done as you, guns held towards the demons. Now you got a proper look at them. They were towering over the hostages, who were crouched on the floor in intimidation. The one in front of you only chuckled. Humans didn’t laugh like this. It was pure malice and recklessness displayed in front of you.

“I thought we told you to stay away,” he began. The only thing you could truly note about him was his mouth. The rest was covered by his mask and where the white of eyes should have been, two orbs of darkness sat, eying you like prey.

“Let the hostages go and we won’t shoot you,” you ordered, with a surprisingly calm voice.

“And why would we do that when we can just kill them?” he asked. His gaze momentarily focused on his fellow demons, as if he was a stand-up comedian and he had just delivered the funniest punch line.

“You will die if you harm even one of the hostages,” you stated.

“Oh, is that so? Humans never learn, do they?” he said. This monster was completely insane. And suicidal too, it seemed. “Go on, shoot.”

First, you thought he was urging your team to shoot. Then you realized, he was looking at the demon closest to you. The very demon you had your gun pointed at. He was asking the other demon to shoot at the hostages. You were preparing to pull the trigger.

But then your mind started racing. You stared at him intensely as your heartbeat quickened uncontrollably in your chest. The dark eyes. The soft lips. His skinny frame and gentle hands. You knew exactly who this demon was. You’d be able to pick him out of any crowd. What the hell was he doing here?

“Shoot!” the bigger demon shouted again, but Chanhee didn’t budge.

“I told you he was goddamn useless,” one of the others said. “Get rid of him.”

“You don’t deserve any of this money,” the bigger demon snarled, and his hand went to his belt. You knew there were human lives on the line. What you were about to do could be considered not only stupid, but wildly imprudent. Emotions were supposed to be left out of police operations. But how could you not have been blind with shock? You were going to let your heart control your body over your mind, and if it was deadly so be it. The bigger demon was now raising his arm at Chanhee.

Before you knew it, you had jumped out from behind the counter. You mirrored the demon’s actions and you pointed at him, pulling the trigger. At the same time, his gun went off. Just in time, you had pushed your body between the two demons.

“Y/N!” Chanhee shouted.

The bullet hit your shoulder and you fell backwards. Burning heat spread through your insides as you stumbled and reached for anything, anyone to hold on to. You could only think of Chanhee, and how your bullet had pierced through the big demon’s skull perfectly. Then, your colleagues opened the gunfire. The shots sounded almost muffled through the intense amount of adrenaline in your blood and the initial effect of being hit. Your body fell to the ground with a heavy thud, and a wave of agony spread through you. You grimaced at the excruciating pain, hands grasping at your shoulder. All you could see was white, before you sank onto your back and the world went dark.

~approximately 18 months later~

“Y/N,” Chanhee said, for the sixth time within the last ten minutes. You pressed your phone harder against your ear, holding it up with your shoulder. Your hands were too busy writing a police report on your laptop.

“Chanhee, I promise I’m writing the last few sentences already,” you assured him. He liked it when you came home early, leaving enough time to relax on the couch with him, instead of falling into bed like a corpse. Today, he was especially insistent, urging you to stay on the phone with him until you had finally packed up your things and left the police department. You guessed he was just trying to make sure you couldn’t stop somewhere along the way and start working on something new. And maybe that fear wasn’t so far off the truth.

“I’m done,” you said. “Status report: I’m switching off the laptop. Now I’m taking my bag. I’m getting up. I’m locking my office behind me. I’ll be home in twenty minutes or less.”

His laughter on the other side of the line made you smile. You couldn’t wait to see his face and get to hug him.

“Alright. I can’t wait,” he said. “I’ll see you.”

The walk home was calm. A soft breeze went through your hair and in the distance, you heard sirens of an ambulance. Promptly you were catapulted back to your memories and into the vehicle after you had been shot. Going in and out of consciousness, you kept repeating one name: Chanhee. When you woke up in the hospital bed, you half-expected him to be sitting there, waiting for you to wake up. But of course that was not the case. He had committed a crime – or at least tried to commit one. The prosecution was in his favor. They acknowledged his compliance with the police and his hesitation to hurt the hostage. Plus, he sold out the other demons and showed no resistance at any point. His regret and sorrow was apparent, nonetheless his mistake caused him 11 months in prison – by far less than the other robbers got.

People had called you insane for standing by him. Others thought you brave and newspapers named him the first good demon in the world. Every week you visited him in prison, often more than once. You made the most of your short time to talk, and with your kindest words you let him know that you were still here for him. Every visit you learned a bit more about how he had ended up in that bank.

After he had walked out on you, he had nowhere to go. So, after strolling the street mazes for days he found himself in the very demon night club he had once warned you about. Most unsavory figures twisted his mind into thinking doing good was no use. They made him believe he would never be able to escape the demon in him, and he might as well embrace the malice. They more or less pulled him along to the robbery, while he overthought the whole thing. It hurt you, seeing him cry as he recounted how scared he was when he saw the hostages. Some of them ended up injured, but all survived. You knew he would have never forgiven himself, had one of them died.

The day you picked him up from prison was a day you’d never forget. Holding each other in your arms felt so right, and you had missed it tremendously. His months at the prison hadn’t been easy, but you made sure he felt loved and cared for when he finally returned. He almost refused to believe that you would open your doors to him again. It was no question to you. You’d always be here for him. Even when he insisted you keep your office at home locked at all times. You trusted him almost a hundred percent by now. His demon only came out rarely, especially in times of stress or intense negative emotions. But you only treated him with kindness, and he gave back just as much of it.

“Chanhee I’m home!” you shouted as you entered your home.

“I’m up here,” he spoke. You ran up the stairs, excited to see him. Your eyes fell onto the open door of your office. For a moment, your heartbeat quickened as you approached it. You must have forgotten to lock the door that morning. Slowly, you pushed it open.

“Hello,” he grinned. You only chuckled as you watched him, sitting by your desk, a book in his hands. “I hope you don’t mind me being in here. This chair is so comfortable.”

“It’s all good,” you said. “Do you know what day it is today?”

“Umm…Friday?” he asked.

“It’s been exactly two years since you first started living here,” you said. “I think we should get some take out and celebrate, what do you say?”

“I can’t believe it’s been two years,” he said. “I’d love that. And you know what? I think I’m ready to start the internship at the police station.”

You smiled proudly. He had put his book down and was getting up.

“You’re going to do good things,” you said, wrapping your arms around him. He finally had found his place. His home. And you were never going to give up on him.

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samdeancass · 4 years ago

Text

CandyFloss

Requested by Destiel's kiddo on Quotev.

Pairing: Jack x female!reader

Genre: Fluff, tiny bit of angst.

Characters: Jack, Y/N,

A/N: Y/N is Crowleys daughter.

Description: Jack and Y/N are visiting an amusement park, where he has his first taste of candyfloss.

Jack had been through a very hard time lately with his father taking his powers and Dean being possessed by Michael. He was becoming overwhelmed with grief and anger; he hardly left his room and was struggling to come to terms with his new way of living: being human.

You had tried everything to coax him out of his room and you were beginning to feel hopeless. You knew that a demon shouldn’t feel so strongly for another being, but Jack brought out the best of you. He made you want to be good.

After your father’s passing; sacrificing himself for the sake of the world, you felt anger that you had never experienced before. You wanted to follow in your father’s footsteps, you wanted to be able to save the world, but still have people in the palm of your hands that you could control. You completely changed when you witnessed your fathers death, and the Winchesters could sense it. The brothers and you had become really close thanks to your father. It broke them inside seeing you so broken.

All of the anger and frustration melted away though when you set your eyes on Jack for the first time. You stood still when he knocked Sam and Dean down, completely unfazed by the situation. He stood up and cocked his head to the side in confusion before running off into the surrounding forest.

It’s safe to say that Jack had helped you through the worst time in your long life, he gave you something to hope for, somebody to love. He made you happy and has helped you become the hero that you wanted to be. Just like there are bad angels, there are good demons.

Now it was time for you to help Jack through this terrible time. Jack was always fascinated with human enjoyment and always wanted to try new things, especially candyfloss. Castiel had once told Jack that when he was human, he tasted candyfloss and that it tasted like flavoured clouds, soft and sweet. Jack had mentioned it nearly everyday since, so you decided to find somewhere that would both be fun and have candyfloss.

After about a hour of searching, you managed to find a nearby amusement Park and you knew that it was the perfect thing to cheer Jack up. You ran towards his room and knocked on the door, waiting for a response. When you didn’t get one, you slowly opened the door and entered the room, making sure to close it behind you.

You noticed a figure lying down on the bed in front of you and suddenly felt very sad. All of the human emotions where still very new to you so you felt each emotion very deeply. You walked over and sat on the side of the bed, running your hand through Jack’s hair.

“Hey, you. How are you today?” You listened for a reply but got nothing. Sighing you walked over to the other side of the bed to face Jack and switched the bedside lamp on. “C’mon, Jack. We need to get you out of this room. It’s really not good for you to be by yourself.” Again, nothing. You stood up and slowly walked towards the door. “Alright then, Jack. I suppose we won’t go to the amusement park and taste some candyfloss.”

Jack’s head lifted up off the pillow with his eyes full of excitement and wonder. “I want to go. Please, can we go?” A large smile erupted onto your face and you turned around, nodding your head. Jack leaped off the bed and ran towards you, engulfing you into a hug.

You took a car from the bunkers garage and started the drive to the park about 10 minutes after telling Jack. He was bouncing up and down in his seat, a large, excited smile taking center stage on his face. He stared in wonder at the large rides as you pulled into the parking lot. You switched off the engine and sat in the car for a little while, just staring at the wonder before you.

“Shall we go inside, Jack?” He nodded his head and you both got out of the car, making your way towards the entrance, hand in hand. Once you paid the entrance tickets, Jack immediately wanted to find the candyfloss stall and made it his first mission.

After what seemed like forever, you finally found the stall and bought two. Jack licked his lips when the vendor handed him the sweet treat and immediately delved in. His eyes went wide as the first piece went onto his tongue, the sweet taste taking over his senses. You smiled at Jack, happy to finally see him happy.

“Y/N, Castiel was right. This does taste like clouds!” You laughed at your boyfriends excitement and took his hand to guide him along the twisting paths of the park.

Each ride that Jack spotted, he wanted to go on and of course, he pulled you with him. The bumper cars were his favourite, he loved riding around and bumping into different people without having any consequences. Although, he did like winning prizes at the stalls. The smile on his face when he realised he won was absolutely precious.

When it was time to head back you wanted to go on one more ride: the Ferris Wheel. You and Jack handed the vendor your ticket and sat down on the seats. The sun was beginning to set, which made for a very stunning view. As the wheel began to move, you and Jack stared at each other and smiled. Today was the best day the both of you had had in a long time and you could see the difference in Jack already. His shoulders were no longer slumped and he was very relaxed. When the wheel reached the top, it stopped for a little while for you to enjoy the view.

You looked out of the window and sighed at the beautiful surroundings that faced back at you. “Thank you, Y/N.” You turned back around to Jack who was staring at you with a sincere but happy expression. “There’s no need to thank me, Jack. I am helping you through your hard time, just like you helped me through mine. It hurts me to see you upset, Jack. I had to try some way of making you happy, and this way worked.”

Jack took your hands in his and kissed the top of yours before leaning in and placing his lips on yours in a sweet, simple kiss. You stayed like this for a few seconds before breaking away. “I love you, Y/N.” You stared at him in shock. You didn’t even know that Jack knew what love was. You stayed silent in shock for a few seconds before replying. “I love you to, Jack.” You both embraced in another kiss until it was time to get off.

You stepped off hand in hand and made your way towards the car to head back to the bunker. The ride home was filled with smiles and hand holding, gestures that would have made you feel sick a few years ago. Jack had changed you for the better and you never wanted to let him go.

Once you arrived at the bunker, you and Jack headed straight to your room. You both lay down on the bed and held each other in your arms. After a little while, you heard soft snores coming from Jack. You looked up and smiled seeing that he was asleep with a small smirk on his face.

It meant the world to you for Jack to be happy and you were going to spend every moment trying to make that happen. He was the most important thing in your life and he deserved all the happiness in the world.

Tags: @akshi8278 @stellastyless

#jack kline fanfiction #jack kline imagine #jack kline x reader #jack kline #supernatural imagine #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fandom #supernatural #supernatural family #spn #spn imagine #spn fanfiction #spn family #spn fandom

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wygolvillage · 3 years ago

Text

ok fuck it here we go

worst belmont: leon- i just dont care about lament of innocence lol. if my wife was turning into a vampire i would simply not kill her to power up a weapon

seventh best: juste- this pains me to put him this low bc i do like him and i absolutely love hod. i like his silly furniture collection its a very humanizing element. i just dont think hes all that interesting Narratively. hod is moreso maxims story imo

sixth best: trevor- hmm i find myself appreciating him a lot more than i used to lately? the cv3 gang as a whole is really good imo and i like the idea of him and sypha as a t4t couple... also bonding over how they were both kinda treated like shit until their skills were deemed useful... like trevor being exiled and then Asked To Come Back once he had a "use" has to feel somewhat dissonant to him. mostly i think hes made more interesting via the characters he allies with but i admit theres something there... i am a trevor enjoyer i would say, but there are just a lot of other belmonts i like more. he wouldbe way higher if i categorized him with the other cv3 protagonists though

fifth best: simon- in original cv he is a pretty standard action hero of sorts. HOWEVER most of my enjoyment is from his other game... cv2 is neat and has It Could Be That Deep vibes i think... i like how its kinda flipped with a belmont intending to resurrect drac for a sort of personal gain (curing himself of the curse) but its executed extremely differently from how richters arc was- richter is more of a tragedy whereas simon is a guy having to go to immense measures just to save himself in a kinda understandable way. he passes from town to town, always distant and never staying long, trying to outpace the quickly approaching death that awaits him. idk its just neat

fourth best: christopher (and also soleiyu)- its a shared position bc christopher is mostly interesting via his relationship to his son, but i think about them a lot... belmonts revenge has story potential. It Could Be That Deep. i think it's interesting that dracula was able to reappear so soon because christopher failed to kill him entirely the first time around, so i actually hc that christopher feels guilt that his son was probably targetted as a result of his mistake. soleiyu himself i think would feel a lot of Shame And Angst over the whole debacle since hes the first belmont to rlly bring shame to his family name and also hes 15 and rlly emotional lol. i have this whole narrative in my head about christopher and soleiyus relationship being really distant and fraught after belmonts revenge since theyre both so haunted and them eventually reconciling in the middle of a rainstorm or smth CHhfssfh. this is all headcanons and exists in my mind only but i think about belmonts revenge fairly often

third best belmont: julius- i was debating whether i liked him or christopher more but julius won me over by virtue of having actual dialogue lol and im sure if we ever got the 1999 game id like him even more... i like how his amnesia results in him realizing his role in the eternal struggle at the same time as soma realizing things about his past life as dracula its a cool parallel i posted about recently. he has a cool boss fight and is also rlly fun to play as in aria and he has cool gay uncle vibes

second best belmont: sonia- i just like her!! i think her backstory in the manuals is kinda interesting and i think she would be a good mom to trevor. i like her dialogue in legends a lot, and she deserved better than what she got. getting a game cancelled and being booted off of the canon timeline sucks man

number 1 best belmont: richter- i like how his whole character is like... you know that honorable family legacy this whole series has been building up? time to tear that shit down and show how it can absolutely destroy a guy. i like how in sotn he seeks to "make the battle last for eternity" because thats all this has ever been!! an eternal battle!! over the course of centuries!! hes like, the essence of Being a belmont turned up to 11 by shafts influences, and i could go on about The Greater Themes Of Cycles In Castlevania but i will not, but its very relevant to my reading of him... richters decision to give up the whip and take the belmonts into hiding after sotn (thus ending the cycle... and the belmonts we see in ooe right after this lead normal happy lives seperated from this idea of Being A Belmont its so interesting...) are smth i think about a lot... freeing his descendants from the same expectations that corrupted him... its Deep. and the post-sotn part of the timeline that ensues as a result of him staining the family name is my favorite era in the series. richter is awesome 😎

#this whole post is incomprehensible

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terrm9 · 4 years ago

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38 and 49 ethan and chiara 😊 from the i love u prompts

Dearest anon, thank you for the request and I am so sorry it took me so long. I truly hope you can still find this enjoyable.

Warnings: hurt/comfort, teeny tiny little bit of angst (maybe?), other than that just fluff

This is set in the time jump in Book 2 (after the gala)

Prompts: “I am not leaving you” & “If only you could see yourself the way I see you”

*** *** ***

It was 2:54 AM when the sharp sound of an incoming call interrupted Chiara’s already light sleep. All traces of it, however, disappeared the moment her phone started ringing, because nobody calls at three in the morning to tell you good news.

Cold sweat made her shiver and she felt like her heart skipped several beats when she noticed Ethan’s name on the display. What was happening? He was not working and he knew she wasn’t either. He would never call her knowing that she was sleeping if it wasn’t for something important.

Or serious.

“Ethan?” she picked up, holding her breath and biting her lip nervously. She was a second away from pacing her room.

“Chiara,” her name sounded like the most precious combination of letters that has ever been created in the moment.

There was no sign of panic or alarm in his voice as he breathed her name out, quite the opposite – was it relief? Could it be?

Why would it be?

“Are you okay?” they both asked at the same time.

Chiara decided to be the first to answer, as it became obvious that Ethan called her to make sure she was okay. She was beginning to understand what was going on and her heart dropped at the realization.

“Of course I am okay. I am at home, I was sleeping.”

The air around Ethan felt colder than he remembered from any other January in Boston and he wondered how big a part his feelings, his emotions, his state, played in the illusion?

It was not his most clever idea, to take a walk in the middle of the night. But the scotch was not working and he needed to escape his own mind - hoping to achieve that with the walk.

“I apologize for waking you up,” he said slowly and then, despite hating these moments of weakness, these moments that became more and more present in his life as of late, he dared to ask. “Could I come in?”

There was a long silence on the other side and he cursed under his breath, this was a terrible mistake, and then the door of her building opened and Chiara stood there, in her tank top and underwear, not caring that it was freezing, a sad smile on her lips.

Ethan stepped closer and he despised himself for being so uncertain, for hesitating before he reached out to her and cupped her cheek with his hand.

She took the hand and put a lingering kiss on his palm, the contrast between her soft and warm lips and his freezing skin so sharp he felt like the touch burned him.

It didn’t take him long to realize that he never wished to be burnt until now.

Without any words, Chiara interlaced their fingers together and led him into her apartment and then straight into her room, her expression soft and understanding and Ethan felt like a little boy that found his comfort and he hated that he needed to be comforted.

And he loved it too.

For a moment or two, Chiara felt the urge to ask him What happened? Are you okay? How long have you been freezing out there before calling me?, but she knew better now.

No matter how much Ethan hated to admit it – no, how much he avoided admitting it – under the mask of stoic, stable doctor, there was a man whose life was falling into pieces and he was failing to put them back together.

Chiara’s little encounter with death back in November was the first event that set Ethan off his axis and they both naively believed that it would be the only one, that they would get through it and life would go back to normal.

And then Luise crashed into Ethan’s life again.

And then the gala did not save Edenbrook and it was reaching its end.

Today, Ethan lost a patient. And it was the moment he insisted that Chiara spends her night in her apartment instead of his that she knew. She knew his night would be the one spent agonizing over what was, what is and most importantly, what will be. She knew that he would beat himself up for things he has no power over, but no matter how stubborn she was, Ethan managed to be more.

And so she left with Elijah after her shift and believed she would meet Ethan in the morning.

Just not three in the morning.

There was no point in asking him, because Chiara Ray knew exactly what was going on, just as she knew that Ethan was not okay.

She didn’t offer him a t-shirt as he took his clothes off, even though there were enough of his t-shirts in her room for him to pick up which one he would like to sleep in.

But Ethan hated sleeping in t-shirt almost as much as he hated talking about the emotions overriding him. And so Chiara didn’t offer him any and just quietly laid down next to him, putting her head on his chest.

“I am sorry for interrupting your night again,” Ethan whispered at last, his gaze pointed on the ceiling.

“I am glad you came,” Chiara smiled softly and put another gentle kiss on his chest, feeling his heart beat rapidly under her lips.

“We are going to be alright,” she spoke again after some time. “Not tonight and not tomorrow, but we are going to be alright one day. We are here and we are together and we are okay. I am not going anywhere, Ethan. I am not leaving you.”

His grip on her waist tightened, a silent acknowledgment of her words, a non-verbal thank you. It was all Ethan managed.

He knew her words were supposed to be soothing, that they had their purpose, a delightful lullaby of reassurance that should have brought sleep that was not marked by nightmares.

But just as Chiara knew without asking, Ethan knew exactly as much.

Ethan knew that her words carried more meaning that some sweet nothings whispered in the darkness of her room, Ethan knew that when Chiara says I am not leaving you, she means every single part of it.

And it scared him.

Did she realize how much was she putting into his arms? Did she realize the power she was giving him by promising to stay by his side?

The hospital was closing and what was he supposed to do? He cannot – he must not – jeopardize her career by expecting her to stay by his side, no matter what his next choice will be. She had the potential to blossom if only she could find the hospital that is worth her presence. And he cannot stop that.

Ethan could live with Chiara hating him for breaking her heart if it would mean that her career was as successful as it deserved to be. He cannot live with Chiara hating him for keeping her close and destroying her chances of becoming the diagnostician she aims to be.

What was he supposed to do?

“Stop doing it,” her soft, sleepy voice interrupted his thoughts and for a moment, he was confused.

“I haven’t done anything,” he defended himself, tilting his head slightly to have a better look at Chiara’s face – her eyes are still peacefully closed and hadn’t she spoken, he would think she was already back to sleep.

“You are spiraling. Analyzing your next steps, drowning in the sea of what if’s and what should’s and I know you think you need to break up with me in order to save my career.”

There was a long silence. Ethan wanted to ask how do you know?, but then he remembered it was Chiara he would be asking and so he didn’t.

In the months of knowing Ethan, Chiara was aware of the ways Ethan’s body responded to his anxiety. She could tell exactly how the fingers on his feet moved rapidly all the time and how a soft gasp left his mouth when an especially strong wave of uncertainty hit him.

“Don’t you ever dare to break up with me because you believe it would be better for me. I am capable of making my own decisions and I decided to be with you,” she went on, her voice sharper than she intended to. “We are not going to solve this whole situation overnight, but even in this moment I know that I want to be part of your life and I want you to be part of mine.”

There were so many things Ethan wanted to tell her. He wished to express his gratitude and he wished Chiara could feel how sorry he was for putting her through so much.

But words stuck in his throat and the only sentence that left him was not even on the list of those he wanted to say.

“I don’t deserve you,” he whispered.

Chiara let out a soft chuckle, the warm breath tickling Ethan’s ribs and despite everything, his lips twitched on the right side, a small smile forming on them.

“Life is hardly about what we deserve,” she whispered back. “Sometimes, we get more than we deserve and sometimes we get less. It is what it is.”

“I don’t think you don’t deserve me, though,” she added quickly, throwing a glance up only to find Ethan staring at her intently. “If only you could see yourself the way I see you,” she sighed but didn’t say anything else.

She didn’t need to, after all. Chiara was the first woman in Ethan’s life that never hesitated to let him know which parts of him she loved and for which she could tear his head off. He knew that in Chiara’s eyes, he was great. Worth love and worth happiness.

In her eyes, he was deserving.

There was another box of untouched thoughts in Ethan’s head and tonight, after he felt Chiara’s breaths getting steadier, he allowed himself to open the box.

Ethan was sure that there was no man, no woman, no person in this world that deserved Chiara. He was sure that Chiara was far too good for mere humans, with their flaws and their sins and their limits, to claim her as theirs.

He was more than sure that he was not deserving of her presence in his life.

But there she was, dedicated to stay, dedicated to show him the world the way she sees it. Dedicated to show him magic, because if Chiara was something, it was magical. Ethereal.

And in the chaos of his uncertainty, Ethan found out that there was one thought that he became certain of.

A frightening one, indeed. But certain.

He loved the woman.

#ethan ramsey #open heart #ethan ramsey x mc #open heart choices #open heart fanfiction

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jkbabiey · 4 years ago

Text

𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚔 𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎 ⤇ 𝙹𝙹𝙺

Words: 2.9K

Pairing: Jungkook x doctor!reader

Genre: angst; fluff; established relationship au ; minor character death :(((

Synopsis: “He would never make you feel any less for having a human side, a weak side. Instead, he would embrace it with everything he had. Always.”

Song Rec: End of a day - Jonghyun ; Breathe - Lee Hi ; That's Okay - D.O. ; Not Alone - NCT 127 ; Try Again - Jaehyun, d.ear ; Inner Child - V ; Through the night - IU ; Be Your Enemy - Taemin, Wendy

The heavy rain fell like never before. The streets were completely drenched and, unfortunately for your completely timid and, currently, partially stoic nature, completely crammed. Your shift in the hospital had just ended. You were exhausted and, on days like this, you couldn’t find your job as a cardiothoracic surgeon more bitter. You loved your job, after the many hardships you’d had to endure to get to the position you are in today and so much effort you had to put into it, you couldn’t have any doubts about your love towards medicine and surgery. And you didn’t.

But the truth is that doing what you do every single day - fighting death itself - wasn’t easy. It takes a colossal number of rocky roads to fully accept and understand that some lives are just too frail for you to save, and, sometimes death is just too stubborn and strong-willed to let you win.

You hadn’t travelled all those paths yet.

Today, you had lost 2 of your patients. Patients you had been following and helping for the last 2 years of your medical career. They held a soft spot in your heart, and they both had had surgical procedures today, with you as their surgeon, as always. But during their surgeries, there were several amounts of complications and your patients weren’t strong enough to handle all the fights they had yet to battle. Unfortunately.

You were still a 29-year-old girl. You were still a dewy-eyed silly over-emotional and easily-attached little girl. To lose 2 of your favourite patients in one day was still way too much for you. But, among your group of friends, you were the hardcore one and you hadn’t cried. Your weak and human side was the last thing you wanted to show to your colleagues. The competitiveness that ruled the medical industry wouldn’t allow you. You had worked hard to build up the reputation you held today among everyone in the hospital. The hardcore emotionless goddess of surgery.

And even though you were, indeed, a hardcore surgery goddess, you were far from emotionless. You cried watching sad movies and were one of the few doctors that actually spent some time of their day to get to know their patients. You were pretty sure, you were going to cry as soon as you got to your black G-class Mercedes Benz, closed all your windows and called your boyfriend. You were sure you would call him as soon as your ass landed on the driver’s seat, and you were sure you would start to cry as soon as you heard his soft boyish voice. Because, amongst all of the soft spots in your heart, he owned the softest of them all. And to talk to him was exactly what you needed.

So, when you got to your car and hopped into it, you looked for his name on your contact list on your phone, for the slightest seconds, because he was right on top of it, from how often you contacted him.

‘Dickhead <3’

Calling…

Call declined.

And that’s when you remembered the small petty argument you two had had the previous night.

The night before

You were still seating in the dinner table, a pout on your lips while you tried to count how many plates you’d have to wash. Your boyfriend had already abandoned you to play with his friend, Taehyung, leaving you and the uncountable plates you had to handwash because Jungkook had decided to ruin your dishwasher. You had had a long day and you really weren’t seeing any way you could handwash so many plates all by yourself. So you decided your boyfriend would be your best and most viable solution. So you stood up from the kitchen’s table stool and walked towards the living room’s sofa in tiny weary steps.

“Guk, can you please help me do the dishes tonight?” you asked after sitting next to him, using the cutest voice you could remember and the most adorable face expression you thought he would fall for.

“Nope, today’s your day,” he answered shortly, not tearing his eyes from the videogame one single moment.

“Babe, please, I had a long day.”

“Yeah, me too. Go do the dishes.”

“I helped you do the dishes last week and you never returned the favour,” you pouted.

“Are you seriously going to keep bothering me? I have one moment to relax by myself, and you have to come here and ruin it!”

Your eyes widened, not expecting him to snap at you so quickly, and for something so small.

“I had a hard day, and I haven’t had a moment for myself as well. Can’t you just help me this once?”

You knew you were being bratty and childish and, probably, a pain in his ass. You knew he probably had also had a very tiring day, after all, he’s Jeon Jungkook, Korea’s golden boy. But you were just so tired, and at least the presence of your boyfriend in the kitchen as you two did the dishes, would surely, make the task a lot more enjoyable.

“Is it so hard to do the fucking dishes? Are you that dim-witted?”

You knew he didn’t mean to call you dumb. If someone asked him, on any other day, about what made him fall for you, he would probably answer something about how intelligent you were, but this time you got affected by his comment. Probably because, that same day, your superior had said you weren’t good enough to be a surgeon due to you being late to his presentation – “A good surgeon is never late, maybe you should reconsider your options.”, those were his words.

“Fuck you Jungkook,” you finally said, turning your back on him, deciding to do the dishes by yourself.

“No, fuck you!” he shouted, throwing the controller to the couch after pausing his game.

He stood up, following you to the kitchen in quick heavy steps. He was looking for a fight. You weren’t in the mood to argue right now, so as soon as you got to the kitchen, you decided to forcefully close the door on his face.

He didn’t barge in as you expected - he could be quite explosive. When you finished cleaning the kitchen and went to your shared bedroom, he was already in bed, laying down only in his underwear and playing something on his phone. You took your clothes off - needless to say, he didn’t spare you a glance. Even the next morning, when you two woke up at 6 AM to go to work, you two never said a word and he didn’t kiss you goodbye like he always did.

Two could play that game.

But, truth is, you couldn’t play that game.

You loved him too much. But he had just declined your call and you didn’t know how to deal with that. So you drove home as fast as you could, still not a single tear on your cheeks, and when you finally barged into your shared apartment, you saw Jungkook laying on the couch and watching a movie. He, once again, didn’t spare you a glace, and his face was completely disinterested in your sudden presence.

“Stop being a dick!” you yelled at him, your voice cracking, from how long you had been holding back your tears. His eyes were quickly directed to you, and his eyebrows furrowed when he noticed the shiny look in your eyes, sitting up on the couch, and staying there, unsure of what was happening. Until tears started running freely along your soft blushed cheeks and you took both your hands to wipe them away. That’s when he stood up, and rushed to you, standing in front of you and softly holding your wrists, so he could pull them away from your face.

“What happened?” he asked softly and your sobs only seemed to intensify. He picked you up, holding you tightly in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist and your face hidden in the crook of his neck. Then he sat with you back in the couch and waited for you to calm down, not saying anything. Just rubbing your back and playing with the roots of your hair.

Then you finally calmed down and decided to pull your face away from his neck, to look him in the eye, for the first time in the whole day.

“What happened baby?” he repeated softly, nudging your still wet nose with his own and you looked down, playing with you fingers.

“My life sucks.”

“Why?”

“My week has been a nightmare so far and now you’re a dick and I really wanted to talk to you just now but you declined my call and I really can’t stand you,” you stated, your voice cracking numerous times, and Jungkook chuckled looking at how helpless you looked and you really wanted to slap him, but then he pecked your lips and grabbed the back of your head, bringing it back to his chest and laying down in the sofa, with you on top of him.

“C’mon, tell what got you all worked up…” he muttered playfully, lovingly looking down at you.

And that’s when tears started pouring out of your eyes once again. At some point, you were already uncontrollably sobbing in his chest, your fists grabbing his shirt and Jungkook’s grip on you tighter than before. The look on his face wasn’t playful anymore, and the furrowed brows and worried eyes were back, his full attention on you.

"I-i had the worst day Jungkook," you let out in a tremulous waver. Jungkook encouraged you to keep going, even though no else but him - that had met you for about 9 years now and knew you better than anyone else ever could - would understand a single word that came out of your mouth. "When I started working as a surgeon there were these 2 charts that were handed to me. An old grumpy man named Charles and a 16-year-old girl, Jessica, the typical teenager who thinks she knows it all. They had pretty severe heart diseases and even though Charles didn't even like me at first and Jessica called me an 'ugly bitch' the first day I met her, I took care of them. They went through a lot and they were so strong. I gave so much of myself to make them stay, you know? I worked so hard to keep them safe," you cried and even though Jungkook already knew what this was about, he prefered to let you let it all out, just humming from time to time. "They've been with me since day 1, they've watched me become a better surgeon and a better person overall. They were closer to me than my own friends” You stopped talking for a few minutes, while Jungkook kissed the crown of your head and your breathing calmed down

"Jessica was turning 18 next week. She was a total romantic. I used to talk to her about us." Jungkook smiled. "Most of the times me and you argued, she was the one to tell me what to do. I talked about you to Charles once. He didn’t really like you that much. But I think it was more of a protective instinct than anything else." you paused and Jungkook kissed your forehead, in a way of support. You closed your eyes and sighed.

"They had surgeries today. I mean, I'm not dumb, I knew by their vitals that they weren't going to last as long as I wanted them to, but I just wasn't prepared," you voice started cracking and wavering once again and the tear stains that had already dried out were once again freshly wet. "Surgery was too much for them, I shouldn't have done it," you cried out. " I am so sorry, this was all my fau-"

"It wasn't... It wasn't your fault. You're a surgeon, it's your job and unfortunately, this is a part that comes with it. It's not your fault. You're an amazing surgeon, they knew it and they trusted you with their lives for 2 years. You never let them down, but no one lasts forever and they were no exception. As you said, they all had severe diseases and even though you're a great surgeon, which was proven with how you kept them here for 2 whole years, you can't always conceive miracles. It was not your fault.”

You two kept quiet after that, you knew he was right. Of course, he was, he was Jungkook. You weren't crying anymore and a great part of that was due to Jungkook's back rubs and constant forehead kisses.

“You know, Jessica never had her first kiss” you whispered. “I used to tell her kissing was disgusting anyways, so she wouldn’t feel left behind by other girls her age” you giggled softly and Jungkook stroked your curly hair, smiling.

“Charles was pretty rude at first, we disliked each other for about 2 weeks and then he told me I reminded him of his daughter because she was also the feisty type. They didn’t get along very well. Haven’t talked to each other for two whole years and today I had to call her after the surgery and tell her that her amazing dad had just died on the table. What hurts the most is that she was so unbothered, I was probably way more devastated than her. He was almost like a father to me.”

"They sound amazing," he commented after you stopped talking.

"They were amazing," you muttered and smiled, sighing softly a bit after and looking up to your boyfriend, who was still massaging your back, his hand was underneath your shirt, directly placed on your skin. He knew his touch always calmed you down, even in the toughest of situations. He would always be the one to get to soothe your nerves. You had met him 9 years ago, but every single moment with him still felt like the first. He was the only one who got to see this side of you. He knew how it was behind the scenes. Behind the perfect and intelligent facade laid some painful experiences and he had lived every single one of them with you. He had experienced the sleepless nights before an exam. He had woken up in the middle of the night to find you seated on the living room’s couch with a cup of hot chocolate in your hands and tear-stained cheeks, all this coming from the constant doubt you would never be able to get rid of and that still haunted you today. ‘Am I good enough for this?’ And he would always stay up, reassuring you that ‘Yes, you’re good enough’ and he would repeat that as many times as you needed him to. Because he knew you were good enough. God, you were so much more than enough.

Jungkook loved you beyond question. You meant the world to him. And looking down at you, he couldn’t help but think about the topic that hadn’t left his mind for the whole week. And that had been the cause for the snappy temper you had been obligated to deal with these past days. He had been pestering his members with this same topic too, and they were already sick of telling him to ‘go for it’. He couldn’t stop thinking about it.

What if it’s too soon? How could it be too soon? He had met you 9 years ago and started dating you 3 years after that. Of course it wasn’t too soon.

What if you didn’t want to be committed to him in that way? Jungkook knew you had quite a problem with commitment, you were terrified of getting committed to something for a lifetime. But... damn... You loved him. He could see it behind your eyes whenever you looked at him. Or in the way you’d lay awake in the middle of the night staring at his face, illuminated by the moon’s shine, and thinking he was asleep. Or in the way you were so comfortable with him, to the point of laying on top of him, eating chocolate cookies, wearing white cotton panties and a t-shirt of his that looked way too large on you, probably because you measured only 5′1′’. You both knew that he was your safe space and you were his.

You would never break down like this in public, in front of your colleagues or your superiors. You couldn’t. But with him, you knew you could and you would anytime you needed to. Because with him you knew you were safe. There would never be any judging. He would never make you feel any less for having a human side, a weak side. Instead, he would embrace it with everything he had.

Always.

“Will you marry me?”

#jeon jungkook #jungkook scenarios #jungkook scenario #jungkok bayby #jungkook baby #jungkook masterlist #jungkook #jungkook doctor au #jungkook reaction #jeon jungguk #jungkoo #doctor au #doctor!reader #established relationship #established rp #would you marry me #marriage au #angst #fluff

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